1 - 20 of 210 Works in Sarcastic Harry Potter
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Harry's just a boy with a cupboard for a bedroom, a scar he doesn't understand, and an overprotective magical cat who seems to think Harry needs guarding from everything. But when he's pulled into the world of magic, he finds more than spells and flying brooms - he finds people who care, secrets that refuse to stay buried, and a destiny that's far more complicated than anyone expected.
Also, there's an annoyingly persistent blond boy who keeps showing up wherever Harry goes, claiming they should be friends. Or rivals. Or something in between.
Oh - and the cat? The cat has a past. And claws.
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The boy who lived, the chosen one, the freak, the black sheep ; these were the names given to him from birth. He was a bit too much like someone many people feared but he himself, wasn't afraid at all of this so called devil. That was because he knew what it felt to be 'different' he knew what it felt to wait every day for his parents to knock on the door of this hellhouse and just tell him everythings going to be okay. Harry James Potter was as much broken as Tom Marvollo Riddle.
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anemoia
(n.) nostalgia for a time you have never known
It’s the Summer between Fifth and Sixth Year and Harry has been introduced to the concept of being Locked Out. Uncle Vernon has quickly become bored with tormenting a unresponsive Harry and decided to Lock him out after he finishes his chores, this left Harry with lots of free time before school would start again in nine weeks.
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Harry has finally found his people, but school is starting up and he really doesn’t know how he will hold up without them.
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Secrets in Emerald Dusk by Didistar
Fandoms: Wednesday (TV 2022), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
24 Oct 2025
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Nevermore Academy has always thrived on secrets, shadows, and monsters — the perfect hunting ground for Wednesday Addams. Prophecies whisper of ruin, a beast tears through the woods, and her family’s hidden past drags itself back into the light. Yet in the midst of every hidden plot, the strangest enigma may just be the strange boy with green eyes: Harry Potter.
And Wednesday knows very well, mysteries have a quick way of turning deadly.
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Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? (you should be) by Snoweylily
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
24 Oct 2025
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“No post on Sundays” Uncle Vernon announced happily, “No damn letters today-”
Something came whizzing down the kitchen chimney as he spoke and caught him sharply on the back of the head. The next moment, thirty or forty letters came pelting out of the fireplace like bullets.
“That does it!” he snapped, his beady little eyes focused solely on Harry, “It’s you that they want. And they won’t stop coming after us until you’re… gone”.
Harry didn't like the sound of that.
“But Vernon, we can’t! You heard what that- that despicable old man told us!”
“Don’t worry, pet” Vernon said, his nasty grin triumphant, “I’ll leave him someplace so far away that those freaks will never trace him back to us. There’s an institute up north, for these- these hopeless cases and whatnot - St Brutus's Secure Centre for Boys. I’ll leave him there, and then we can get back to our nice, normal life”.Or, the one where Harry doesn't attend Hogwarts in first year but finds his way to the wizarding world anyway, and this changes everything.
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Adventures of a Suicidal Gentleman by House_of_Shells
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
23 Oct 2025
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Draco muốn tự tử, nhưng hắn cố không làm quá về chuyện đó. Harry muốn ngủ với Draco, nhưng anh không muốn bày tỏ quá lộ liễu.
Hiểu lầm! Day dứt! Đau buồn! Ghét bản thân mình nhưng theo một cách quyến rũ chăng?
Cùng với sự có mặt của: Gia tinh Misty sẽ không để ai bắt nạt mình, một Astoria có những ý định bí ẩn, một Draco quyết định dùng sự hài hước cho qua mọi chuyện và một Harry không biết mình muốn gì, ngoại trừ việc muốn chạm vào khuôn mặt xinh xắn của Draco.
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Harry Potter had lived as a shell of a person ever since he arrived that faithful night as an orphan on the Dursley family's doorstep. A child that never laughed, never cried, and never wanted to. He went to school, did his chores, and went back to the safety of his cupboard. He had no friends, a family who never wanted him, and no emotions to really care about it all. The only thing with substance in his life were the glimpses of gold behind his eyes when the night became too dark, and the sounds of faint laughter ringing out when his cupboard was too silent. He lived for these moments, as they were the only light in his life. That all changed on the eve of his 7th birthday . . .
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Just before the start of his fifth year, Harry Potter gets expelled for using underage magic in front of a muggle. Dumbledore, however, reinstates Harry, but as a formality, he has to get re-sorted. What nobody knew though, is that the sorting hat fully intended to get what it wanted this time, just like it wanted for Harry in his first year.
Update: (10/10/2025) There is going to be 32 chapters total, not 1, I just can't change it yet sadly as it won't let me
Update: (22/10/2025) will be in the chapter notes
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You can do better by HadrianPeverellBlack
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Supernatural (TV 2005)
22 Oct 2025
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Voldemort hissed. "Do you think your sarcasm will protect you from my wand, Potter?"
"I don't think I really need to be protected from your wand." Harry retorted. "Since, historically, you're terrible at trying to kill me. Really, you're terrible. You should ask someone for help."
Series
- Part 36 of Cultober 2025
- Part 52 of Jerk, Bitch & Brat series
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Driver picks the music ~ I'm sorry, are you the one with the broken ankle? by HadrianPeverellBlack
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
14 Oct 2025
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Whoever said breaking a bone didn't hurt must have never broken a bone.
And, besides, he'd better stay far away from Harry at that moment, because he'd shoot him if he tried to say anything like, It's not that bad, or, It's okay.
It was that bad and it wasn't okay at all.
Series
- Part 20 of Cultober 2025
- Part 36 of Jerk, Bitch & Brat series
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it's kinda cute by HadrianPeverellBlack
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
14 Oct 2025
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from Happiness can be found even in the darkest moments, when Harry falls asleep in the airplane.
After the first time he met his brothers
Series
- Part 19 of Cultober 2025
- Part 35 of Jerk, Bitch & Brat series
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What's The Worst That Could Happen? by Katherinexx
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
11 Oct 2025
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Harry was fairly sure he’d seen everything the wizarding world had to offer, but he was not prepared for two Hermiones.
One, of course, was his Hermione.
The other was blonder, sharper and less of a girl but sounding just like her.
Or the war is over and Harry thought he would be free but suddlenty he finds himself attending an exceptional eight year where Hermione decided to befriend sodding, bloody Malfoy. And Harry, as usual, had no choice but to live with the consequences.
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Harry Potter has been used as a pawn before.
Not this time.
Reborn as Hadrian, armed with centuries of power and bound by fate to Tom Riddle, he will shatter Dumbledore’s lies and restore wizarding Britain to the Old Ways—where light and dark walk in harmony, and balance is forged in fire. Ready or not, the world will change.
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Sometimes Fairytale are Warnings by HadrianPeverellBlack
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
09 Oct 2025
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Harry, Sam and Dean deal with the Tournament and with the demons that escaped the Gate of Hell.
Dean's time is running
Series
- Part 2 of Jerk, Bitch & Brat series
- Part 22 of Fandom Free Bingo
- Part 1 of Post July Bingo 2025
- Part 30 of MultiFandom Flash Bingo 2023
- Part 2 of Square by square
- Part 1 of Character Plus Bingo
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Five Jedi and a Very Lost Wizard by OliviaLH
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Star Wars - All Media Types
08 Oct 2025
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Harry Potter, the Master of Death and tired beyond all measure, performs a ritual to find a quiet life in another dimension. Instead, his traumatized magic spits him out into a galaxy far, far away, where his every attempt at a simple spell causes a catastrophic, reality-defying incident.
Now, five of the most powerful Jedi in the Republic are filing five completely different, utterly contradictory reports about the series of anomalies plaguing their war effort: an unethical mind-controller, a pyromaniac super-weapon inventor, a vandal with a grudge against pristine floors, a ghost who smells of burnt sugar, and a man who summons aggressively cheerful spirit animals.
They're all hunting for a different person. They're all about to find the same one.
Series
- Part 23 of Harry Potter Oneshot
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Do you think they would bring me back? by HadrianPeverellBlack
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
05 Oct 2025
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Harry, Sam and Dean, missing scenes from Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things
Series
- Part 5 of Cultober 2025
- Part 21 of Jerk, Bitch & Brat series
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At six years old, Harry Potter's life takes an unexpected turn when he's saved and adopted by his enemy. A turn for the better where he finds himself surrounded by a new family and friends that gave him everything he wanted, needed, and could hope for.
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unexpected by sarcasticlord
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
27 Sep 2025
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harry escaped the graveyard but the portkey didnt take him back to hogwarts. cedric wasn’t at the graveyard.
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There comes a day when even the Dark Lord is terrfied.
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After the Battle of Hogwarts, Neville Longbottom only wants peace, plants, and a little quiet. He’s spent years being invisible, clumsy, and shy—but now he is a hero, one of the war kids, yet he’d rather stay out of the spotlight.
Pansy Parkinson, once Slytherin’s queen, wants to reclaim her crown and prove she’s untouchable. When a bet is made that she can make Neville fall for her, what starts as a game quickly becomes far more complicated. Because Neville isn’t the boy everyone thinks he is—and Pansy might be the one who’s falling instead.
Enemies? Lovers? Friends? In a school still haunted by the past, sometimes the quietest hearts are the hardest to conquer..