I’m sorry I used the phrase “massive hunk of man meat”
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She Works Hard for the Honey by abbykadabbra for DrPansyParkinson, shakespearedidnothavecumsh0ts (loginhasbeentaken)
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
21 Nov 2024
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Summary
Inspired by a Twitter thread between @starkozovasslag and @DrPansyP (no longer on X, find her on bsky!)
Bee suggested that Neville hires an escort for a ministry party and it ends up being ex-classmate turned wizarding world famous icon Pansy Parkinson and then DrPansy added that Neville had actually described Pansy to the agency when he was booking and that he hired an escort in the first place because he’s still a virgin (due to his enormous dick that he can’t find anyone capable of handling) 🫠
Thank you both for your beautiful brains!!
This is the first work I’ve ever posted to AO3, so please please let me know if anything additional needs to be tagged or something looks off.
I also used google translate for a few phrases, please let me know if they’re wrong, I would love to update if they’re inaccurate!
I wrote this at work and it feels like it was a spectacular use of my time 🥰
Oh also, it’s always fuck JKR!!