1 - 20 of 50 Works in Astroglide: The Official Lubricant of the Our Flag Means Death Fandom

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Устраиваем романтический пикник у моря, напоминающий наше первое с Эдом свидание

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    304
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    34
    Hits:
    149
  2. Tags
    Summary

    After a lifetime to doing what was expected of him, Stede Bonnet finds himself jobless, disowned, divorced (happily) and newly out. He runs to the one place he had always felt safe: his late grandmother's summer home in Purple Bay, Nova Scotia where they had spent most of Stede's summer's together when he was a child.

    It isn't the same without his grandmother Anne, of course. Stede misses her, misses his children, his ex wife Mary and even Mary's boyfriend Doug. Can he make a new life for himself here in this small town, can he carve out some happiness for himself? Can he make lasting friendships? Can he survive Ed, his neighbour across the road? He's easily the most beautiful person Stede has ever seen...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    61,733
    Chapters:
    27/?
    Comments:
    488
    Kudos:
    425
    Bookmarks:
    81
    Hits:
    11,719
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Stede has a crush, and there’s nothing he can do about it except watch from his usual spot on the playground at 3pm on Fridays as Mr Teach opens the classroom door.

    In which Mr Teach is Louis’ school teacher and Louis adores him, but Stede only gets to see him from afar on his Friday pickups… until something happens at school and Mr Teach needs to talk to him about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    225
  4. Tags
    Summary

    It's finally here! The Our Flag Means Fanfiction podcast will be coming to you every 2 weeks focusing on a new character or trope. An ever-evolving team of fic writers offer their analysis and hilarity while sharing the favorite fics we've been reading. It's all about turning poison into positivity!
    ----
    Episode 1 - THE IZZY EPISODE! (we also talk about #Renewasacrew). We will get a season 3! Manifest with us! And hear what we want to see of Izzy in both fic and on future episodes of the show!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,817
    Chapters:
    29/29
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    668
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Seasoned pro cyclist Edward “Blackbeard” Teach is counting down the days to his retirement when his swansong at the Tour de France is thrown off-course by a starry-eyed newcomer. Can Stede Bonnet’s enthusiasm remind Ed why he loves cycling, and perhaps help him find some joy in his personal life too?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    238
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    13
    Hits:
    187
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Professor Ed Teach is planning to spend his spring break with Professor Stede Bonnet. What nonsense will these two lovebirds get up to?

    The one bed prof boys return, with art in several chapters by Sailor’s Ruin.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,336
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    417
    Kudos:
    183
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    2,900
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Podfic of Rinse and Repeat by YellowMustard

    --

    Stede draws his attention back to the head massage, alternating pressure from the kind of bruising that’s enough to knead a migraine away, to gentle, delicate strokes through his hair. He grows almost meditative with it, forcing his eyes away from Ed’s face and simply enjoying the feeling of body heat and cool, damp-silk hair against his palms. Truthfully, he could do this for hours, rather than the usual three-to-five minutes that’s usually afforded to customers when they…

    When…

    It’s been longer than three-to-five minutes.

    A quick glance at the clock reveals it’s been far, far longer than three-to-five minutes.

    Stede doesn’t mind, obviously. And Ed doesn’t seem to be about to question it. But the snide little Lucius-like voice in the back of his mind points out that almost twenty fucking minutes is maybe a bit of an overkill.

    Stede yanks his hands away from Ed’s hair like it’s covered in bleach.

    “Okey-doke!” Stede manages, voice shrill and a little strangled.

    From across the salon, the real Lucius snorts.

    (OR: Stede's a hair stylist. Ed shows up for an appointment. And shows up. And shows up. And shows up...)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    76
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    36
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1,205
  8. Tags
    Summary

    It's the first snow day of the school year, and Ed is ready to spend time with his roommate/boyfriend after both of them have been busy. Stede has his own plans for their day, and is ready to go that extra step with Ed

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,378
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    101
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    729
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Stede Bonnet returns to the office from a dreadful lunch date, and his assistant, Lucius Spriggs, coaches him through the finer points of online dating apps. They scroll, swipe, and snipe together, and they each set a date for that evening. What could possibly go wrong?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,145
    Chapters:
    2/4
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    363
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Ed really does need to get Kraken washed, though, and there’s only one free spot down the end. He gets waved down that way and drives down, but he can’t see who’s down there…

    Until he does and… oh. Oh. Everyone else Ed has seen, here and maybe ever, falls away. Ed’s mouth goes dry and he swallows as he drives towards the hottest, leggiest blond he’s ever seen. Holy shit. He feels lightheaded. Has Ed in fact discovered the hottest person alive, living here in his unassuming new neighborhood? What are the odds?

    The blond is wearing the tiniest cut-off denim shorts Ed’s ever seen, so most of his museum-worthy, freckled, toned legs are on display. He’s got on a little white tee shirt, tight across a broad torso.

    The man spots Ed’s car heading his way and he gives a happy little wave, smiling broadly. Oh no, he’s adorable as well as hot. He’s got a fucking dimple and everything. Ed can’t see his eyes behind his aviators, but he bets those are nice too.

    Ed is deeply fucked.

    Well, hopefully. If he still remembers how to turn on the charm.

    ~~~~~

    Five times Ed Teach saw Stede Bonnet in sexy little outfits and wanted to (but failed to) ask him on a date, and the one time he did.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,959
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    160
    Kudos:
    326
    Bookmarks:
    45
    Hits:
    2,738
  11. Tags
    Summary

    1718. The Golden Age of Piracy.

    Former pirates Stede Bonnet and Edward Teach retire to run an inn on land.

    Things do not go as planned…

    This is a story about growth.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    90,031
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    406
    Kudos:
    347
    Bookmarks:
    77
    Hits:
    8,134
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Are you down and out because your co-captain-slash-situationship told you he’d meet you on a dock, but then completely ghosted you?

    Are you feeling empty, emotionally drained, but also kinda horny about it?

    Then boy howdy, does Lucius Spriggs have the perfect solution for you!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    42
  13. Tags
    Summary

    And now a word from our sponsors…

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    41
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Stede Bonnet attempts to step outside his comfort zone and ask out his ridiculously handsome new coworker. Things do not go as planned.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    63,031
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    128
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    2,132
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Professors Ed and Stede have to return home to their own lives after the fateful conference that brought them together. How will they cope with being apart? And how soon can they see each other again?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,821
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Comments:
    962
    Kudos:
    280
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    5,701
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Are you down and out because your co-captain-slash-situationship told you he’d meet you on a dock, but then completely ghosted you?

    Are you feeling empty, emotionally drained, but also kinda horny about it?

    Then boy howdy, does Lucius Spriggs have the perfect solution for you!

     

     

    Written for "Tortured Pirates Department" Day 9: "Guilty As Sin" - Taylor Swift's moodiest bop about sad wanking.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    398
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    122
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Ed’s not a good person. A good person wouldn’t fall head over heels in lust with their new, very married, neighbor. A good person wouldn’t stare with hunger every time that neighbor takes his kids (his fucking kids!) to the local pool dressed in tiny swim trunks. A good neighbor wouldn’t imagine that married man’s incredible tree trunk legs wrapped around him while they—

     

    No, stop that. Stede is married.

     

    Ed sometimes wonders about his marriage, though. He’s heard Stede and his wife, Mary, fighting, echoes carried on the wind as he sits in his backyard. And he’s seen Stede give him a look sometimes, and Ed wonders if he’s not completely straight.

    But even so. Married. To Mary, who’s pretty cool, actually. And they’ve got kids. Two of them, cute little munchkins, too.

    Ed knows all this. He knows it, as well as he knows his name or that his knee hurts a bit first thing in the morning or that the sky is fucking blue. But it doesn’t stop the desire. The yearning.

    Worst of all, knowing it doesn’t stop the dreams.

    ~~~~

    Ed is plagued by sexy dreams of his new neighbor. As time goes on, he starts to suspect that they're not just dreams, but memories.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,621
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    96
    Kudos:
    238
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    1,592
  18. Tags
    Summary

    I got Rhys Darby's birth time! So let's talk about astrology—the astrology of Our Flag Means Death and how the show's astrology intersects with the astrology of all of us: the fans! Joining this week is: Ringa Sunn, Tessa, Chloe, and Me, Carly Heath.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    263
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    33
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Ed Teach, new to the the town of Revenge, stops by the lemonade stand across the street from his house every Friday. It's definitely because he loves Alma's lemonade, and definitely not because he's got a crush on her absurdly hot dad.

    Or: It’s a lemonade stand meet-cute!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    274
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Bug nerd Ed and YouTuber Stede have been navigating the peaks and troughs of living together. What will this fall and winter bring?

    A fic based on ofmdmicrofic’s prompts for the month of May. The plan is to update daily. Smut will be tagged and skippable.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,386
    Chapters:
    31/31
    Comments:
    1,194
    Kudos:
    213
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    5,098

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