Chapter 1: The Truth Circle
Chapter Text
Shiro and Allura took inspiration from Pidge’s reveal and the trust she’d put in the team and, soon after, called the defenders of the universe to a meeting in what passed as an alien lounge room. With everyone seated Allura cleared her throat.
“Shiro and I have realized we haven’t given everyone a chance to divulge any secrets they might have.” She announced, gaining raised eyebrows all round.
“What Princess Allura means to say is that, to form Voltron we need to be able to trust each other and we need to be sure we’re safe.” Shiro clarified. “And we realized we haven’t given everyone a chance to clarify or explain anything that might not come up in casual conversation and might affect how well we can form Voltron.” He explained. “So we thought we’d take the time to give us all that chance now. Is there anything anyone wants to say?”
Lance hesitated at the question, he’s pretty sure everyone did. He wasn’t entirely sure his secret would really affect Voltron, but then again he was hiding a big part of himself from people he was meant to trust. After a long moment of silence, the blue pilot took a deep breath.
“I’ve got something.” He said before he could chicken out. All eyes turned to him and Lance bit his lip, looking at his knees. He had to say it now. “I’m not, well, I’m kinda not really all human.” He said, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m a Selkie.” He braced himself and really, he shouldn’t’ve been surprised by the response of his team.
“Lance, take this seriously.” Shiro frowned at him in disapproval.
“What’s a ‘Selkie’?” Allura asked, whose own frown was one of confusion.
“They’re mythical creatures, humans that can turn into an otter or something. They’re not real.” Pidge answered her and Lance tried not to get mad at her butchered definition, although he couldn’t help but be a little bit annoyed.
“A seal Pidge. Selkie’s are a type of ocean Fae that look like seals, however we can shed out pelts and look human. And we are real.” Lance fixed the definition, stressing the final two words.
“Oh really? There where’s your pelt?” Keith rolled his eyes, also clearly on the not believing bandwagon.
“Oh gee Keith, let me just pull it out of thin air!” Lance replied sarcastically, glaring at his self-proclaimed rival. “It’s not like I really got time to pack before Blue took us through the worm hole.”
“Lance, please, can you just take this seriously?” Shiro sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“I am being serious Shiro! I’m a Selkie!” Lance protested, annoyance in his tone. “You believe me, right Hunk?” He turned to his suspiciously silent best friend.
“Well… I mean…” The yellow pilot trailed of.
“Hunk!” Lance frowned.
“Lance, it’s just, Selkies are myths. Magic isn’t really a thing…” He mumbled.
“The lions are magic!” Lance snapped. “The castle is magic! The Galra have a druid!”
“That’s not the same! That’s all alien stuff, and not like, from Earth.” Hunk claimed.
“That doesn’t make any sense!” Lance groaned.
“Lance, that’s enough, alright? If you have something honest to add by all means do but let’s move on from this.” Shiro sighed. Lance opened his mouth to protest yet again but the glare he was given shut the blue pilot up, huffing and leaning into the back of the couch, arms crossed.
He wasn’t going to give this up, he told himself, he’d keep mentioning it until one day they believed him.
Chapter 2: All Selkies Are
Summary:
The second time the team doesn't believe Lance
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“You’re really not as pretty as you think you are Lance.” Pidge sighed as Lance came back to the wallflower after flirting with yet another member of the alien race they’d liberated. One of the newer planets to have been conquered the people here weren’t at risk of not knowing what to do the way the Balmerans had been. They also knew how to throw a brilliant celebration, in Lance’s opinion.
“Of course I am. Selkies are always incredibly attractive.” Lance grinned at his friend. Since revealing his species to the other Paladins Lance had become a lot more liberal in mentioning it, even if nothing he couldn’t seem to get through to his team members that he was telling the truth.
“Not this again.” Pidge rolled her eyes, taking a sip of a drink Shiro had first checked wasn’t alcoholic before allowing his team, especially the youngest, to drink. As far as Shiro could tell, the alien drink was fine. Alike to a soft drink, really.
“Maybe if you guys would just believe me I wouldn’t feel the need to mention it every other minute.” Lance huffed.
“We’re not going to fall for your joke Lance.” Pidge glared.
“I’m not joking, it’s the truth.” Lance protested for what might’ve been the hundredth time.
“What’s going on here?” Shiro asked, concern on his face as he came up to the two team members.
“Lance is going about the Selkie thing again.” Pidge told him.
“Lance, we’ve talked about this, the joke is old and it was never funny, just drop it.” Shiro sighed.
“It’s not a joke!” Lance snapped. Both Paladins looked ready to argue with him so the blue pilot turned on heel and stormed off back to the castle.
He was getting sick of his team not trusting him not to lie to them about this.
Notes:
Some Selkie lore for you:
Male Selkies are very attractive and very good lovers. They also have the ability to seduce females. Lance doesn't like using magic to seduce people though, because he's not a sucubus. (his sisters reponse to that is 'of course not, you have a dick')
Chapter 3: Seasick
Summary:
The third time the team doesn't believe him
Notes:
Some uncle coran for you
Also Seasick, homesick, get it.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It wasn’t quite the ocean but the alien water was close enough to make Lance sigh, missing the waves and currents of his home off shore.
“You alright there chap?” Coran sat with him, making the distracted pilot jump. “You’ve been sitting out here for a couple of your Earth hours.”
“I have?” Lance asked, dragging his gaze from the sea to look at the alien. “I didn’t even notice.”
“You did seem to be in quite the trance.” Coran nodded in a way he probably thought was sagely. “Missing home again?”
“Yeah.” Lance sighed, leaning back a bit more. “I wish I had my pelt. I’ve never been in my human form for so long.”
“Ah, yes, I’ve heard much about this pelt from Shiro.” Lance groaned at that.
“Don’t listen to Shiro. He thinks I’m lying, they all do.” He huffed.
“I don’t think you’re lying. I can’t imagine Altean’s like myself were the only shapeshifters in the universe.” Coran hummed.
“It’s not like that.” Lance sighed, continuing before Coran could ask. “My pelt is like a body part, and when I shift it’s not like I’m disguising myself the way you and Allura can, it’s not for that. It’s… I can’t explain it, it’s not like anything else.”
“Ah, well, perhaps I can see it one day? Maybe that will help me to understand.” Coran offered and Lance smiled. It was nice to have someone who didn’t think he was playing some dumb, too long joke.
“You got it. As soon as we get back home and I have my pelt I’ll show you.” Behind him he heard a scoff and his smile dropped.
“Don’t hold your breath Coran.” Keith told the other, earning himself a heated glare from Lance. “He’s not a Selkie, they don’t exist.”
“You shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss your fellow Paladins Keith.” Coran scolded. “Voltron is formed out of trust. If Lance is assuring you he’s a Selkie you have to trust that he’s telling the truth.”
“I’ll believe it when I see it.” Keith rolled his eyes. “Hunk says the foods ready.” The red pilot headed back into the castle without another word, not checking to see if Coran and Lance were following him. Coran got up to follow but Lance turned his head back to the sea.
“Come on Lance, a Paladin needs his strength.” Coran encouraged but Lance just sighed.
“I’m really not hungry Coran.” He mumbled. He didn’t think it was a convincing performance but Coran left him alone all the same.
Lance ended up watching the ocean until Hunk eventually dragged him back inside the castle.
Notes:
More Selkie lore for you:
Selkies that are on land often gaze longingly off to the sea, espically those that are unhappy.
Also, unhappy selkies = unhealthy selkies
Chapter 4: Stolen
Summary:
The fourth time the team didn't belive Lance.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Lance could feel it, the unwelcome touch of something, someone, taking his pelt. It hurt. The pelt was with his family, safe and sound and waiting for his return from school. Or it was meant to be, but then it was awaiting his return from space, and now it wasn’t at home. He was sure of it.
Lance didn’t know what that meant. He didn’t know if his family was okay and safe, if it’d been a random robbery, or maybe someone trying to find a way to get his scent for search dogs he wasn’t sure. All he was sure about was that it hurt, like someone had yanked all his hair back and slammed the back of his head into a table or a wall or some other solid mass.
“Lance!” Someone was calling his name. Shiro, he eventually realized.
“Lance, buddy, what’s wrong?” That was Hunk’s voice. The team had been training, fighting the gladiator, before it had happened. At the back of his mind Lance wondered if they’d believe him now.
“What happened?” Allura demanded, worry clear in her tone although the princess clearly attempted to hide it.
“I’m not sure, Lance just… doubled over and collapsed. I don’t think the gladiator was even near him.” Shiro reported.
“Lance, come on, deep breaths.” Keith urged and Lance tried to do as he was told. Everything still hurt, but now it was more of a throbbing rather than the initial sharp pain.
“Lance what happened?” Pidge asked. So many people talking at once, Lance tried to focus, finding it hard.
“My pelt.” He managed to mumble. “Someone’s stolen it.” That earnt him groans from everyone who immediately switched from being worried to claiming he was trying to get out of training, maybe find a way to get them to fall for the trick. Lance wasn’t paying attention to them anymore as a thought struck him, one that made him sick to the stomach.
Lance was bound to whoever had taken his pelt.
Should they ever find him, he’d be forced to stay with them. His mother had described it alike to how marriages had once worked before woman had had any rights at all. Wives had been seen as their husband’s property. It wasn’t an exact explanation of what it was, but it was the simpler version she’d given a younger him to scare Lance into keeping a very, very close eye on his pelt.
And now someone had it.
Without responding to the annoyance of his teammates Lance ran from the training room to the nearest toilet, just in time to lose the meagre lunch he’d had to be forced to eat earlier that day.
Notes:
This isn't lore that I've managed to find, however, i thought it would make sense that a selkie can feel what happens to their pelt, as it is like a second skin, and therefore if you are incredibly rough with their pelt (like this thief was), they'll feel it.
Chapter 5: Distrust
Summary:
The fifth time the team doesn't believe Lance.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Voltron could only be formed by 5 Paladins who trusted their team to back them up and be there for them. The Black Lion’s pilot had to be sure they could lead their team and that their team would look to them for leadership, the Red and Green Lions had to be piloted by two who were sure they could fight for their fellow Paladins and that their team would fight for them as well, the Blue and Yellow Lions had to be at the hands of two that were sure they could support their team and would be supported in return.
The problem was, Lance couldn’t find it in him to trust his team, could no longer pretend to think they would support him no matter what.
He’d been trying to, as hard as he could, but there was only so many times people could claim you were lying when you weren’t before you couldn’t take it anymore and his team had gone well beyond that number.
If he was honest, Lance considered it a miracle they’d managed to form Voltron for as long as they had. This, he thought, was a long time coming.
“What’s going on?” Shiro asked, frustrated and confused as the lions remained five and not one. “We need to transform guys.”
“We know that Shiro!” Pidge replied, confusion wasn’t a good mood on the green pilot who liked to understand and know everything.
“I don’t know what’s going on.” Hunk frowned. “I mean, I feel like a leg. Do you guys feel like a leg? Or uh, an arm or a head I guess.”
“Clearly at least one of you is out of synch with the others.” Allura sounded just as frustrated as Shiro and Pidge.
“It’s me.” Lance told her because, really, who else could it have been? No one else was having their very existence ignored and denied over and over again.
“Argh, this better not be anything ‘Selkie’ thing.” Keith groaned over the coms.
“It’s hard to be the supportive leg of a team that won’t even believe you.” Lance huffed, not in the mood for an argument, even though he knew that was what was going to happen no matter what he said. They just wouldn’t believe him.
“Lance, Voltron is more important than some stupid joke!” Pidge snapped.
“I’m well aware of that Pidge! Do you really think I’d risk the fate of the universe over a joke?!” Lance snapped back. He let out a yelp as he felt his second skin being injured again, like a large paper cut. The person who’d taken his second skin must know what they had, Lance was sure of it. Whoever they were they were constantly damaging the pelt with cuts and heat, and while Lance wasn’t sure how bad the damage looked he certainly knew how bad it hurt. Lance wondered, sometimes when there were less important things to think about, if they were trying to force the bound Selkie to find them. He hoped not, since he assumed whoever they were they were on Earth and he was certainly not.
“We don’t have time for this!” Shiro exclaimed. “We’ll have to deal with not transforming later, for now let’s just finish them as quickly as we can, it might be a bit harder now that we aren’t Voltron but I’m sure we can do it.” Lance wasn’t sure he could even manage to feel guilty about it. It wasn’t his fault they wouldn’t believe him.
The fight was bad. They’d won, eventually, but some of the lions had been damaged and a lot of hostility had been thrown in the direction of the Blue pilot. It wasn’t his fault, he reminded them every time, it was there’s for not trusting him. That, of course, didn’t go down well.
When the fighting had finally ended and the lions were safely in their hangers the team was meant to go to the dining room. Shiro had announced they’d have a late dinner and discuss what was going wrong. Lance was annoyed by the idea. He’d told them what had gone wrong.
Instead of joining them, Lance stayed in Blue. He ignored Hunk and Pidge when the two tried to come get him. He even ignored Coran, the only person in the castle to believe him, when the other came to check on him and bring him some food.
The pain of his pelt being damaged that woke him when he tried to sleep in the hanger of his lion was nothing compared to the fact that his team didn’t trust him.
Notes:
Again, i reckon if your rough with a Selkie's pelt they'll feel it.
Chapter 6: The Theif
Summary:
The one time the team realizes he was telling the truth.
Notes:
anyone ever hear the phrase it has to get worse before it gets better?
Also thanks to everyone for the kudos and the comments, they're really great and lovely and you're all wonderful
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Everyone on Voltron, maybe even everyone in the universe, knew that Pidge would do anything to find her family and have them safely returned. It came as a surprise to no one that the gadget she’d made to track Galra supply ships and invasion messages could also intercept any message contain the words ‘human’ or ‘prisoners’.
“Allura the planet isn’t that far from here! I can go alone and get my family and come back without alerting anyone.” Pidge protested Allura’s refusal to let her, or anyone, go for the rescue mission.
“No. Pidge, I understand that you want to get your family back but we can’t save two people and leave the rest on the planet to suffer.” Allura sighed. “And since you still can’t form Voltron there is little chance of being able to free the planet with how guarded it no doubt is. I’m sorry Pidge.”
“It’s not my fault we can’t form Voltron!” Pidge protested and Lance couldn’t help but flinch slightly. He was trying, really, but no amount of food fights and mean Allura could make him trust a team that refused to believe him. He didn’t say anything as the group listened to the women argue. Over the months Lance had become withdrawn and quiet, barely eating and barely sleeping.
“Pidge, the answer is no and that’s final.” Allura said.
No one was surprised when Pidge headed to Green after everyone had presumably headed to bed. In fact, they were so unsurprised that Shiro, Keith, Hunk, and even Lance were waiting for her.
“Don’t try to talk me out of this.” Pidge said firmly when she saw them.
“We won’t.” Shiro assured. “We’re coming with you.” Pidge hesitated before nodding.
“Alright.” The five of them piled in and Pidge used the small wormhole generator she’d made for her lion to take them right to the planet.
When they landed it was suspiciously empty. The group couldn’t see any guards, let alone prisoners.
“Maybe everyone went home for the holidays?” Hunk offered.
“No, somethings wrong.” Shiro frowned as he looked around.
“It doesn’t matter. If there’s a remote chance that my family is here we need to check.” Pidge said firmly. “This place no doubt has computers, Shiro you come with me in case I need a power source.” She decided. Shiro hesitated before agreeing.
“Alright.” He said. “Hunk you look around for any sign of people working, Keith you head that way, see those things, they’re probably holding cells and there might be people in them, Lance you come with us in case we need someone to watch out for guards. Everyone be careful, just because we haven’t seen any Galra doesn’t mean they aren’t here. Use your coms if you find anything.” Shiro instructed. Everyone agreed and spilt up soon after.
Lance stood at the door to the main control room as Pidge tapped away at the computer inside, Shiro keeping it running.
“My family was here.” He heard Pidge say. “But not for a long time.”
“I thought you said the message was about the human prisoners being moved in a week.” Shiro frowned.
“Exactly. So why are we actually here?” Lance zoned out from their conversation. Something felt… he wasn’t sure how to place it. It was like a string drawing him away from where he stood to somewhere down the hall.
Before he realized it Lance was in front of a door. He wasn’t sure how he’d gotten there and he wasn’t sure if Shiro and Pidge had noticed he was gone. He told himself he should probably go back to the control room.
Instead he found himself opening the door to the room and stepping inside. The door slide shut behind him but Lance didn’t notice, too focused on a mass of white fur in the middle of the room. The coat was cut up, with fur missing in bits, and some of it soot coved and slightly burnt as though it had been held too close to a fire, but to its owner it was still as recognizable as the back of his hand. Lance grinned, rushing over to pick the coat up.
He couldn’t touch it.
Lance’s mind caught up with the situation and the grin slipped from his face, replaced by a thick dread in the pit of his stomach.
A stolen pelt must be willingly returned. He was bound to whomever had stolen his pelt.
His stolen pelt was on inside a Galra building.
His pelt had been taken by the Galra.
Lance gulped.
“G-guys?” He tried to speak over his coms, voice shaking almost as much as his hands were. No one replied.
“Do not bother.” Lance jumped and turned to find a woman standing in front of the closed, presumably locked, door. “Your communications have been cut off Selkie, you team cannot hear you.”
“You’re saying it wrong.” Lance mumbled. “It’s Selkie, not se-licky or whatever it was you just said.” He looked at his feet, tense and shaking. She ignored him.
“Tell me ‘paladin’,” The way she said it made Lance flinch she spoke as though he didn’t deserve the term, as though he made a mockery of it. “You are bound to the one who has stolen your pelt, are you not?” Lance bit his lip. There was no reason to lie, no reason to withhold the truth. It wasn’t like if he did they could go separate ways.
“Yeah.” He mumbled, the dread in his stomach growing as he admitted it, as though speaking the words made it worse, more real.
“Excellent.” The other chuckled. “Lord Zarkon will be pleased. My name is Haggar, child. I am the one who took your fur.” Lance felt like he was going to be sick. He recognized the name. He’d been told she was the right hand of Zarkon, no doubt the reason he was still alive after all this time.
“What? I never would have guessed.” Lance faked a gasp, quick to try to hide his fear behind sarcasm, although the tone wasn’t quite right.
“Silence.” The druid frowned. “Do not forget child, you are mine now. It would do you good to learn some manners. Tell me, how does the Champions arm fare?” She smirked and Lance gulped again.
What was he going to do?
“You will bring me your Lion.” The witch demanded and Lance almost relaxed hearing it, hoping that meant that she had no idea how to control a bonded Selkie.
“I won’t.” He said, the firmest sentence he’d managed since he’d entered the room. “One, I can’t, she’s not on the planet.” Silently Lance was thankful for Shiro’s insistence that they all take the Green lion instead of their own, despite the awkwardness of the trip. “And even if she was, that’s not how it works. You can’t order me around.” It wasn’t quite that straight forward, but Lance had no desire to elaborate. The witch frowned again, staring at him for a long moment before deciding to accept his statement.
“No matter. The Blue Lion will not choose another pilot while you remain with me, Voltron cannot be formed without you.” If Lance hadn’t been terrified he’d have laughed. Voltron couldn’t be formed with him either it seemed. “Come, child, it is time to meet your new master.” The witch smirked and Lance’s heart dropped again. She walked around him, taking his pelt harshly and carelessly, sharp nails digging into the Paladin’s second skin.
Of course he knew that would have happened, of course he’d known since he felt his pelt be stolen that he may face a day he’d have no choice but to leave Voltron, but Lance had gotten very good at ignoring that.
“How did you get it?” Lance asked, hoping to stall if only for a moment.
“If you are worried for whomever was watching it fret not. I had no need to travel to your despicable planet to take your weakness. Rest assured, however, that they like everyone else in this disgusting universe will soon be under Lord Zarkon’s control.” If one good thing had happened at least, Lance though, he was sure now his family was safe. Haggar began to walk out of the room and though Lance desperately didn’t want to follow, he had no choice.
They’d been walking for a few minutes when the coms came back on.
“Lance!” Shiro called out to him. “Where are you?!” Lance hesitated a moment, watching to see if Haggar had noticed somehow. She hadn’t.
“Shiro, listen to me, you have to get away from here, okay? Leave me behind, just g-“ He was cut off by the furious druid in front of him sending him into the wall. His head hit the metal and everything went dark.
He last thought was to hope, desperately, that they believed him now. That his team knew he wouldn’t go with Haggar willingly.
Pidge and Shiro hadn’t noticed at first that Lance had left them, much too focused on the computer in front of them.
Pidge frowned at the screen as she tried to figure out what sort of trap she was sure they’d walked into. She’d stopped scrolling through the files on the computer for a moment, just… staring at the screen because what she’d found made no sense.
“Is that…” Shiro trailed off, frowning at the file the cursor hovered over.
“Yeah.” Pidge answered. It made no sense. Why would a Galran computer have a file labelled ‘Selkie’ on it? After a moment Pidge opened it.
According to the file, someone had overheard what the team was sure was Lance’s idea of a joke and reported it to the Galran empire. Apparently Haggar had heard of it and she had done her resource.
Apparently Haggar had found Lance’s pelt.
“But… that would… I mean if…” Pidge wasn’t sure how she was meant to finish the sentence.
“He was telling the truth.” Shiro did it for her. To his side his human hand was clenched.
“And this was a trap for him.” Pidge mumbled as she read through the rest of the file. Both turned to the door where they had thought he was but Lance had already left.
“Lance!” Shiro shouted before turning to the coms. “Lance, come in!”
“I thought Lance was with you guys.” Hunk responded.
“Is everything alright?” Keith asked.
Lance was silent.
“Pidge, try to find Lance in the security footage.” Shiro instructed. “Keith, Hunk, get back here now.” He ordered the two. “This whole thing was a trap to take Lance and so far it seems to be working. We need to find him and we need to free him.” He ordered. “We... guys he wasn’t lying.” He mumbled softly.
“What?” Keith responded, confusion clear in his voice.
“Lance is a Selkie.” Pidge answered when Shiro did not, distracted by the screen.
“Please tell me you guys aren’t getting in on the joke too.” Keith groaned but there was a slight bit too much uncertainty in his tone.
“You want the proof we have Galra files explaining that they found his pelt.” Shiro instantly shot him down. “We need to find Lance now so hurry up and get here.”
“We should have believed him.” Hunk mumbled into his coms. “If we’d believed him he wouldn’t be in trouble.”
No one protested Hunk’s claim.
Not when Lance was knocked out half way through a message on the coms. Not when they were too late to stop the ship that took him away. Not when they watched the footage of what happened. Not when they had to explain what happened to Allura. Not when Coran didn’t say ‘I told you so’.
Notes:
Some Selkie lore!
There's different lore when it comes to the return of a Selkie pelt. Some lore says that a Selkie can steal their coat back however there's a lot of lore that says a Selkie's coat has to be willingly returned (historically this is accidently done by their unwitting children but thats not going to happen for Lance)
If the latter had proven to be true Haggar had planned to knock him out and hide the coat because Haggar is unaware of what happens when a Selkie regains their pelt.Its actually really hard to find lore that explains what it means for a Selkie to be bonded to the person who stole their coat and I have zero about stolen male Selkie coats, so the way it works is more my interpretation of a few stories and it'll be explained more in later chapters. The way I understand the staying with the person is that they have to be somewhere the person with the pelt has taken them (on Earth this usually just means the theifs home.)
Also Lance is basically Haggar's wife now.
I do apologize if any of my lore is incorrect, the internet is vast but not always correct.
Chapter 7: Forbidden
Summary:
The first bonus, Lance's first experience's Zarkon's prison or really, in Haggar's 'work' room.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The first thing Lance saw was purple. He groaned and sat up, rubbing his temples to try to quell the throbbing in his head as he tried to place where he was.
“Oh.” He mumbled, remembering what had happened. He looked around at the empty room he was in and assumed it had to be a cell. Three of the walls were plain, the last was made of electric like bars and the blue paladin didn’t even bother to attempt to touch them. Beyond them the hall was empty, not even a guard. Lance gulped and stood, a task a lot more difficult with his hands handcuffed behind him.
What was he going to do?
He could try to escape, he supposed, but he wasn’t exactly going to able to get far considering his current… situation, and he no longer had his armour or his bayard. The uniform he’d been gifted had been replaced with rags similar to the ones they’d found Shiro in. Lance sighed. That whole situation felt like a life time away from here.
He could pretend to still be knocked out, but he wasn’t sure what good that could do for him.
Really all he could do was wait.
With a sigh Lance began to pace the small cell he’d been put in and when that wore thin he sat against the wall of the cell and stared at the barred wall. On occasion a guard had walked past but at most they gave him was a smirk or a glare.
At some point he fell asleep but when he woke up the only thing that had changed was that food had been left out for him.
Lance guessed that a few more hours passed before Haggar appeared. He glared at her but didn’t do much else. What could he do? She had his pelt.
“Come Selkie.” She ordered as the bars vanished with a zap. Lance waited as long as he could before getting up. At least this time she pronounced it right.
Lance was led by Hagger with two guards behind him through a maze of halls to an intimidating looking door. Lance gulped as it opened, no sound despite how large it was. The guards shoved him into the room when he didn’t immediately follow Hagger inside. He wasn’t surprised, really, to find Zarkon sitting on his throne behind the door. He looked back at the guard, glaring, if only to avoid looking at the menacing self-proclaimed lord of the universe.
He was forced to stand in front of Zarkon but Lance couldn’t managed to make himself look up at the alien ruler, staring forward instead, which had him looking at Zarkon’s chest.
“So, this is the Paladin of the Blue Lion?” The alien spoke and Lance tensed. He certainly had a voice that matched his form. The emperor stood and walked towards him, circling Lance like a prized dog, or seal really, at a pet show. It took almost all of Lance’s will power not to flinch. “He doesn’t seem like much of a Paladin. I assume he’s the runt of the group.” Lance held his tongue at that, only because he felt like saying ‘uh, actually Pidge is the runt of the pack, and Shiro’s the only one of us that actually looks like a Paladin was probably not the best idea. “Where has the Blue lion been placed?”
“Unfortunately there was no way to get the lion without risking the interference of the other Paladins.” Haggar reported and Lance, against every life preserving instinct he had, scoffed.
“Yeah, because there was no way I was going to just hand Blue over to you.” He said, surprising himself in how calm he sounded. Lance was one to use sass and sarcasm to hide his fear and though he was sure it wouldn’t do him any good it was a hard habit to kick.
“Haggar, I thought you said you could control him.” Zarkon was probably frowning. Lance wasn’t sure if he should be glad he’d made the evil space lord frown or not.
“There are some… complications Lord Zarkon. It would seem the conclusions we drew about the term ‘bonded’ were incorrect.” Haggar informed him.
“These things have rules, duh.” Lance rolled his eyes, his mouth continuing to move despite his brain screaming at him to stay silent. “Aren’t you meant to be like, a space witch or something? Shouldn’t you know these things?”
“Silence.” Zarkon growled and this time Lance did flinch. “What are these rules child?” He determined.
“Oh sure, let me just to tell you the exact way to control my every action. Make sense.” Lance scoffed. “Not gonna hap-“ He was cut off as Zarkon’s fist collided with his chest, possibly breaking a rib as it winded him.
“I’ll give you one more chance.” Zarkon said calmly. “Tell me.”
“I’d rather not.” Lance said, breathless as he spoke. He screamed as Zarkon took his hand and broke his wrist.
“Perhaps some time alone with Haggar will loosen your lips.” The alien emperor suggested, moving from the Paladin and returning to his throne. “Remember, keep him alive. We don’t need the Blue lion choosing another, more qualified, Paladin.”
“Of course Lord Zarkon.” Haggar smirked. Lance had time to gulp and register the now almost ever present dread in his stomach before one of the guards used the butt of their gun to knock him out.
-
When Lance opened his eyes this time he looked up at a purple ceiling, somewhat obstructed by a machine he couldn’t begin to describe. He tried to move but found his arms and legs firmly restrained. He guessed the surface he was against was a bench or something similar. He began to struggle against the restraints but when he moved his right wrist Lance yelped as pain shot through the broken bone.
“I do not suggest struggling child, it will make this worse.” Haggar smirked to his side, repositioning the thing above him.
“What is that?” Lance demanded, trying his hardest not to worsen the pain in his wrist.
“You will find out soon enough.” The druid told him. Before Lance could reply she turned the machine on. Lance screamed as a purple beam seemed to penetrate through to his very core and tear a piece of him away. When it finally stopped the Paladin was panting, sweat covering his face, and his wrist completely forgotten.
Above him sat a contained essence, icy blue in colour. Lance could barely focus on it, his vision blurry.
“I took more than I meant to.” Haggar commented, taking the essence from above him. She eyed Lance beneath her. “But you’ll survive.”
“What did, what did you do?” Lance breathed, words almost too quiet to be heard.
“I harvested some of the quiescence inside you.” Haggar answered. “It’s quite interesting, I wonder if that is due to you being an Earthling or because you’re a creature of magic.” She inquired, speaking to herself now. “I will have to have one of the Earth prisoners sent here so that I may compare it.” As she spoke a thought came to Lance. He was a creature of magic. A creature of magic able to force others to fall in love with him in some form or another. He didn’t often use the magic all his kind had but he still had it and he couldn’t think of a better way to use in than this.
He was out of practice and exhausted but Lance focused on Haggar, on her heart and her mind and on changing her emotions.
He could feel it starting to work and grinned. Until Haggar turned to him with fury in her face.
“How dare you try such tricks on me?” She screamed, raising a hand to him. Pain flooded his body as a purple lightning struck him. “You are forbidden to attempt your magical foolery on me, do you understand?!” She demanded. Had it not been for the way his eyes widened, the way he tensed up at her words, she might have missed it. Instead, Haggar smirked at the Paladin’s reactions. “You are forbidden from moving until I say you may.” She said. Lance shut his eyes tightly as he felt the restraints release.
He didn’t move.
“So, that is your secret.” Haggar chuckled. She moved from his sight and Lance couldn’t so much turn his head to watch her. He screamed as he felt something slice through his second skin. “I don’t believe Lord Zarkon needs to know that, not just yet.”
Lance guessed he remained unmoving on Haggar’s bench for hours. She spent that time testing the limitations of his connection to his second skin through pain. His once beautiful pelt was now barely more than a rag, torn apart and ripped with parts burnt black and a lot of fur missing.
When the Blue Paladin next faced Zarkon he couldn’t stand, exhausted and still in pain from Haggar’s mistreatment of his pelt he was forced to kneel at the feet of the emperor.
“Well done Haggar.” Zarkon praised the druid to his side as he watched the creature at his feet.
“It was my pleasure.” Lance barely managed to scoff at that and the witch’s response was immediate. “You are forbidden from showing such disrespect child.” Lance didn’t react, glaring at the ground in front of him. “Lord Zarkon, allow me to continue my experiments on the boy. I believe his connection to his fur may pose a way to give your army and yourself a way to negate all injuries dealt.” It was silent a moment.
“Keep him alive.” Zarkon said. “But otherwise he is yours to do as you desire.”
Lance almost felt glad. If Haggar needed his pelt she wouldn’t burn it and as long as even a scrap of his pelt remained there was a chance it could be returned to him.
But then, that was only if his team came to get him.
And only if they believed him.
When he was shoved back into his cell Lance felt a little piece of his heart break at the thought that his friends might came for him and not believe him, or worse yet, that they’d never come at all.
Notes:
Some interpretation of Selkie Lore:
I can't find lore on the exact nature and extent of control one gets over a Selkie by stealing their pelt but I can find a lot that have similar themes of Selkie's not being allowed to do things and so thats how I've taken to understanding it.It's not as clear cut as 'i forbid...' however, there are still things that can't be forbidden
Chapter 8: A Familar-ish Face
Summary:
One time Lance is believed.
Notes:
Have a long chapter were my precious child Lance sees some shit and where Matt deserves better.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Lance would have guessed a week or two had passed. He sat in his cell, sitting as best he could without bothering his injuries. Haggar was brutal in her so called experiments, though Lance believed meaningless torture was a more fitting description, as opposed to the ‘meaningful’ torture he received when Zarkon had him integrated.
The two had been incredibly mad to discover they couldn’t simply forbid Lance from keeping things from them.
It left Lance almost completely covered in bruises. He nose was no doubt broken, his left ankle had been badly sprained, and he’d guess at least three of his ribs were broken. He was covered in scratches and cuts that varied in depth, the worst of which had been roughly and harshly stitched so that they wouldn’t kill him.
Lance sighed and leaned back against the wall of his cell, wincing slightly. The cell was his favourite part of the ship. It was large, empty, and often silent. Normally he’d hate the silence but after hours of screaming or hearing only Zarkon and Haggar it was more than welcomed. His favourite part of the cell, however, was the fact that Haggar wasn’t there to control him. He still had to obey the rules she’d already set but he didn’t have to worry about more being added. It was a blissful relief, the last sense of freedom he had, and the irony of that was not lost on the blue paladin.
The silence of his cell was shattered as footsteps began to echo throughout the hall. Lance frowned, they didn’t sound like robot footsteps so he prepared himself for the worst. Slipping a smirk onto his face and, painfully, moving into a nonchalant position he tried to portray an aura of calm and cockiness.
The act was for nothing. The guards that eventually came to view were escorting a prisoner. The prisoner, Lance realized very quickly, was human. Human and very, very familiar.
“Pidge!” He panicked, gaining the attention of all three. Both of the guards glared at him but kept pushing the limping prisoner, who frowned at Lance, along.
Lance watched them go, confused and worried. With more than a moment’s thought he realized the human was too tall and too skinny to be Pidge, they looked as though they’d been a prisoner for much longer than Lance, and besides Pidge didn’t have a limp.
But, Lance remembered, Pidge’s family was captured by the Galra Empire with Shiro.
Lance gulped as he remembered something else, something Haggar had said the first time Lance had been in her work room.
“I’m so, so sorry Pidge.” He mumbled to himself after the guards and prisoner had long since passed him.
He wasn’t sure if he expected to see the possible-Pidge relative again or not, but he was surprised when, Lance guessed a day or two later, the prisoner was shoved into his large and empty cell. Lance was quick to move to catch the falling human with his good hand since he didn’t have handcuffs on but the tripped human did.
“Thanks.” They mumbled as the guards turned the 4th cell wall back on and left without a word.
“You alright?” Lance asked after watching the guards walk away.
“Yeah.” They sighed, nodding. “Just, really tried.” Lance helped them to sit down probably and by the time they were the other human was asleep. The Blue Paladin couldn’t help but follow suit soon after.
Lance woke up screaming and doubling over. It felt like his pelt was burning and fear gripped him. When finally the pain subsided Lance remained doubled over, tears brimming in his eyes.
“Please no.” He whimpered. “Please, please no.” He didn’t even register his own pleas, hoping desperately that his pelt was still intact, that he hadn’t really been severed from it. It took him a few moments to realize there was a hand rubbing his back, repeat soft and soothing words to him. It took a few minutes but he managed to calm down, sniffling and wiping his eyes.
“Sorry I woke you.” He mumbled to the possible, probable, Pidge relative.
“It’s alright.” The other spoke just as softly as they had while soothing him. “Are you okay?”
“I…” Lance wasn’t sure how to answer that. No, was the answer, no he was not okay. If his pelt has been turned to ash he didn’t think he’d ever be okay again. But how was he meant to say that? How was he meant to explain that?
“Sorry, dumb question.” The other gave him a smile that seemed mostly not forced.
“Are you alright? You didn’t seem very okay when they threw you in here.” Lance decided to change the topic.
“I’m feeling a lot better.” They answered. “Thanks for catching me.”
“No trouble, I’m always there to save damsels in distress.” Lance joked. It was just a little too forced, tone just a little too heavy, but it was nice all the same to act like it wasn’t. His new cellmate rolled their eyes but seemed amused all the same.
“How come you called me Pidge?” They asked.
“Huh? Oh, well, you look a lot like your little sister. I’m assuming she’s your little sister.” Lance said but the other just frowned.
“My little sister’s name is Katie.” He said.
“Katie?” Lance frowned. “But you were on Kerberos mission with Shiro weren’t you?”
“You’ve seen Shiro? Is he okay?” The other’s eyes widened. “I heard rumours that he got out, do you know if they’re true?” They asked. Lance was almost taken aback at how quickly the other boy gained real life at just Shiro’s name.
“Yeah, he’s fine.” Lance grinned, the others energy contagious. “Actually, he’s better than fine. Have you heard of Voltron?”
“Uh, yeah. The older prisoners sometimes tell stories about it. Some massive robot, right? What does that have to do with Shiro?” They frowned.
“Shiro’s the head!” Lance grinned. “He’s one of the five Paladins of the lions.”
“Wow.” The human smiled. “I’m glad he’s okay.”
“Just so you know, I’m the Paladin of the Blue Lion.” Lance grinned. “Lance McClain at your service.”
“Matt Holt. It’s nice to meet you.” The two shooks hands.
“Okay so, if you were on his mission you’d have to be Pidge’s older brother.” Lance said. “She’s one of the other pilot’s too. And she’s looking for you and your father.” He added. Matt’s face dropped at that and Lance frowned.
“What happened?” He asked, softly.
“I don’t…” Matt mumbled. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Lance hesitated but nodded. They slipped into silence, neither one feeling up to going back to sleep.
“So, what’s your favourite colour?” Lance asked as the silence stretched on. He preferred the silence of his cell to time spent with Zarkon and Haggar, however he hadn’t realized how much he’d longed for a proper conversation. It felt like a small piece of his heart mended as he and Matt talked on and on about nothing in particular.
Matt was a different person when Haggar came to their cell. He smiled and joked and even laughed with Lance, some of it was forced and there was a lot of tension in the air but when they heard the footsteps Matt tensed up and went silent.
When Haggar appeared Matt started shaking and tried to make himself smaller, hiding behind Lance some. Lance was more than happy to be between Matt and the druid, glaring at her feet since he couldn’t glare at her directly. For a moment he despised his race and the curse it brought. When that moment ended he despised himself for ever thinking such a thing.
“Come with me.” She instructed. Behind him Matt whimpered. Lance knew they didn’t have much of a choice so the Paladin stood. “Both of you.” She added and Lance was pretty sure her smirk grew when Matt flinched. Lance helped the older boy stand on shaking legs. They began to walk, Haggar in front and two guards behind. Matt was limping, not quite able to keep up with Lance and Haggar, and the guards behind them seemed to be taking a lot of pleasure in shoving the human ahead. Lance glared behind them at the guards and put a hand around Matt’s waste, helping him to move a little faster.
By the time they reached Haggar’s little workshop of horrors Lance was almost worried Matt was shaking so much he’d fall over if the Paladin let go. Lance’s stomach dropped when he saw what was on the bench.
A robotic leg. It was almost like a matching set to Shiro’s arm.
“I’m not going to let you touch him.” He said, keeping Matt behind him. Haggar chuckled.
“You forget your place Selkie.” She smirked. “I forbid you from interfering.” Lance clenched his hands into fists so tight that his nails dung into his palm. “However, I will give you a choice.”
Lance doubted he was going to like it.
“Answer Lord Zarkon’s questions about Voltron and he’ll remain in one piece.” She offered. Lance hesitated. He wanted to protect Matt, he really did. Lance had seen the way Shiro looked at his arm sometimes, like he wanted to tear it apart piece by piece, like it made him less than human. The blue Paladin didn’t want that for Matt.
But he couldn’t betray his team like that, not when the fate of the universe rested in their hands.
Lance’s shoulders slumped. “I’m so sorry Matt.” He mumbled.
“No, please no.” Matt whimpered behind him. The guards moved from behind the two, taking the human boys arms. Lance could do nothing, watching them restrain the struggling, terrified teen. Lance wasn’t surprised they didn’t so much knock him out before Haggar took a laser to cut Matt’s leg off at the knee. He screamed, there as so much blood, Lance could see bone.
The selkie felt like throwing up.
It lasted hours, and when it was finally, finally over Matt had passed out. From the pain or blood loss Lance didn’t know, wasn’t sure he wanted to.
Lance was returned to his cell.
Matt was taken somewhere else.
Lance felt a piece of his heart break away. He’d let someone be hurt, let Pidge’s brother be hurt and he’d done nothing to help him.
The Blue Paladin was taken to Zarkon the next day. Lance was silent, ignoring Zarkon completely as the alien demanded answer after answer that Lance refused to give. He didn’t even have the energy for snark or to even glare at Zarkon’s feet.
“I won’t tell you, no matter what you do I won’t tell you anything.” Lance claimed eventually, mumbling softly.
“You are forbidden from lying child.” Haggar instructed from Zarkon’s side.
“I won’t tell you anything, no matter what.” Lance repeated firmly. Just barely, out of the corner of his eye, he could see Haggar frowning.
“You will break Paladin. You will not last forever.” Zarkon claimed. “Your friends haven’t come for you, you mean nothing to them. Why protect their secrets?”
“I won’t betray them.” Lance said firmly. “And since I can’t lie now why don’t you just give up?”
By the time he was returned to his cell Lance had a new set of stitches over his shoulder. He was rolled on his side, watching the wall.
Zarkon had been right about one thing. His friends hadn’t come for him. Did he really mean nothing to them? Lance knew they didn’t trust him but would they would they leave him here to rot?
Metal echoed loudly in the ship but flesh not so much. The two sounds contrasted greatly as whoever was walking came closer. There were more sounds, boots hitting the hall maybe, but Lance wasn’t awake enough to register much more than that.
The cell’s electric entrance was shut off and the metal steps and skin steps stumbled in. The cell’s electric entrance turned back on with a zap and a crackle. The boots walked away. Lance shifted in his sleep, waking a little.
“Lance?” Lance wasn’t sure how he hadn’t placed it before. The footsteps should have been a dead giveaway. He shot up and winced as a chain reaction caused his whole being to hurt. Lance stared, wide eyed, at Matt for a moment before looking down and then away when he spotted the metal, Galran leg. Lance guessed it’s been a few days since he last he saw the human and a few days since his shoulder had needed stitches.
“I’m sorry.” He mumbled. “I’m so sorry.”
“Shiro’s the one that stabbed my leg.” Matt said, so much calmer than Lance expected him to be. “When we were fast captured Shiro and I were meant to fight. I’m not much of a fighter, Shiro knew that. I didn’t know what he was doing at first but stabbing my leg sent me to a work camp. It was the lesser of two evils I guess.”
“That was different.” Lance mumbled. “I wasn’t saving your life.”
“Voltron’s meant to save the universe, right?” Matt asked.
“Yeah.” Lance nodded slightly.
“I don’t know if you know this but I happen to live in the universe.” Matt teased. Lance couldn’t help but smile, just a little bit, despite his attempts not to. “I’ll be fine Lance.” Lance hesitated but nodded. Matt sat next to him, leaning against the wall. Lance didn’t lean back, his shoulder hurt too much.
They sat in silence again.
“I’m glad you’re okay, I was worried.” Lance sighed.
“I was just in a different cell.” Matt said. “But I guess there are too many prisoners to have two people in solo cells.” It was quiet again. “So… you’re not human, are you?” Lance tensed up hearing those words. Lance knew the Holts were a smart, scientific family. Could he really tell Pidge’s older brother he was a selkie? Pidge hadn’t taken it very well at all.
“…No.” Lance mumbled before he’d really even decided if he was going to tell Matt or not.
“The druid called you a Selkie.” Matt prompted when Lance didn’t continue. The Paladin took a deep breath.
“Yeah.” He mumbled, looking away. “She has my pelt. That’s how I got into this mess.” He explained.
“Okay.” Matt nodded.
“Okay?” Lance frowned, turning to look at him for the first time since Matt had entered the cell. “You believe me? Just like that?”
“Well you’re telling the truth, right?” Matt asked.
“Of course! It’s just… no one else did.” He mumbled.
“I’ve spent more than a year imprisoned with aliens, and I’ve seen the druids and what they can. A selkie isn’t that unbelievable.” Before the Paladin was sure what he was doing he had his arms wrapped around Matt and a smile on his face that wasn’t even slightly forced for once. Matt seemed a little surprised before genteelly hugging back.
“Thank you.” Lance all but whispered. “You have no idea how much that means to me.” He said, burying his head into Matt’s neck. He hadn’t realized how much he needed to hear that.
“I need to thank you Lance.” Matt mumbled. “I thought… I thought Shiro was dead. I was scared I’d never see my sister again. Knowing they’re both alive and out there saving the universe? I’m just… I don’t know how much longer I was going to last in here. Not without Dad, not with Haggar.” He sighed. Matt brought up a hand to his chest and Lance knew Haggar had taken some of his quintessence.
“It’s my fault you’re here.” Lance mumbled. “Haggar mentioned wanting to compare a selkie and human.” Matt shook his head.
“It’s her fault, not yours.” He said. “Geez, you have a complex for blaming yourself.” He teased, shoving Lance genteelly in the wrong shoulder. Lance winced and Matt frowned.
“It’s okay, just a little sore.” Lance grinned before Matt could say anything. “Hey, you should tell me some embarrassing stories about Pidge, uh, Katie.” He suggested, quickly changing the topic before his cellmate could press the issue. Matt hesitated a moment before smiling.
Two days, maybe, later Matt was once more dragged out of the cell. Lance tried not to think of what that meant for the prisoners that had been in his cell earlier.
Haggar and Zarkon were very good at keeping his thoughts away from probably massacred prisoners.
Notes:
I'm kinda of nervous about how i made Matt act.
The way I see him, he's fine in a cell because he's use to that, and while he's not going to provoke the guards he's not going to shy away in fear.Haggar, however, terrifies him. As does Zarkon.
Also, I reckon he's acts a lot like Pidge but with a dash of something solely Matt. He's also incredibly understanding of people, you give him two seconds to get over tramatic experience and he'll understand the motives and then decide if he can forgive you. Kinda like this:
"Shiro stabbed me! Oh wait I get it, yeah I forgive him."
"Lance could've saved my leg! No he couldn't've, he's protecting Voltron which includes Shiro and Katie. Of course I forgive him, actually i feel bad for ever being mad."
"Katie ate the last cookie! That's it, disowned, unloved, never forgive, never forgot."He'll probably change a bit if they get out though.
Chapter 9: Little Ray of Hope
Summary:
One time when Lance admits he's dying.
Notes:
In case you also thought Lance hadn't been though enough.
Also thank you so much for all the kudos, comments and hits, it's really great to be getting so much support!
Now let's all appricate the fact there has not been a single curse word in this (minus A/N) cause that like never happens with me
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Lance’s winced as Haggar poured the healing substance over his chest.
“I would not complain if I were you child, no one else gets this kindness.” The druid commented, looking down at him none too kindly.
“Cutting my chest open is not something I’d consider ‘kindness’.” Lance growled. Haggar stopped pouring the refined quintessence over his chest despite the cut not being completely healed, he wouldn’t need to have stitches at least. It wasn’t his own quintessence for once, the druid had taken to testing his quintessence on someone else, or no one as far as Lance was aware. She did still extract it from him as regularly as she was able however so he assumed she was doing something with it.
The druid placed the bottle out of reach and left, leaving Lance unable to move or even glare at her as the door closed upon her exit. If he’d kept his mouth shut she’d had finished healing his chest, maybe even some of his other injuries so he was in peek condition for his next torture session, and he’d have been shoved back into his cell. Of course the Blue Paladin had never been capable of keeping his mouth shut and he wasn’t going to start now, being disrespectful included things like glaring and directly bad mouthing her and Zarkon, not voicing opinions or being snarky. Haggar couldn’t forbid him from that, much to her annoyance.
Besides, even if he was returned to his cell, he doubted Matt would be back yet and it was much worse being in an empty cell than being trapped on Haggar’s bench.
Matt had quickly become Lance’s last and only shred of joy in the life he was otherwise starting to lose any hope in. They didn’t share a cell always but the selkie looked forward to when they did. Sometimes he managed to forget that they were in an alien warlord’s prison, losing himself in Matt’s eyes and Matt’s voice.
They talked about anything and everything. They’d compared the different alien’s they’d met, Matt had won that by a landslide, the weirdest food they’d heard of or see, surprisingly Matt had relented victory to Lance after hearing about Coran’s paladin speciality, and the worst advice they’d been given, another win for Matt.
They even talked about home. Lance adored being able to tell someone his true history, no little white lies. He even told Matt his real age. Matt believed all of it, which was the best thing anyone could have ever done for the selkie.
Matt often liked talking about the technology he’d seen on the ships, the things he’d heard about on other planets, how he wished he could’ve really seen it all.
The one thing neither of them did was talk about what they would do if they ever go out. Lance was losing faith he would ever get out, terrified Haggar had burnt his pelt and starting to believe that Zarkon was right and his friends weren’t even looking for him, but he hated that Matt seemed to believe he wouldn’t get out either. Lance really wanted Matt to be free. To get to go home and tell the world he was one of the first three humans to prove aliens existed, even if the Galra weren’t exactly interested in peace and small chat. But there really wasn’t anything he could do about it and Lance knew that.
The blue paladin tried to sit up and wasn’t surprised when nothing happened. It was unfair, he thought, because no human would have been able to do this to him. Haggar just had to be a super powerful space witch that wasn’t half as restricted as a normal pelt thief. Most pelt thieves could forbid a selkie from leaving a house or entering a room, very few have the ability to be as precise as Haggar.
Then again, that was sort of the least of his worries. Which, really, was saying something.
When Lance eventually did return to his cell Matt wasn’t there. He had no idea where Matt was taken when he was out of Lance’s cell and the sometimes-cellmate hated it. For all he knew Matt was being tortured by Zarkon, or thrown in with some less than friendly and sane prisoners, or in the gladiator ring. For all he knew Matt could be dying.
It was a stressful time for Lance.
Matt did return that night, sporting a few new bruises that made Lance frown. They didn’t comment on it though, they never did. Lance had it so much better than Matt. He was sure that if his death didn’t mean the rise of a new Paladin that he wouldn’t still be in one piece. He wouldn’t be granted so much ‘kindness’. Matt had no such assurances.
“Hey.” Matt sat down carefully next to Lance and Lance had to resist the urge to hug him tightly.
“Hey.” He mumbled instead. “I’m glad you’re okay.” As okay as anyone could be on this ship. Anyone but Lance, the paladin added to himself bitterly. It wasn’t fair. “So, tell me about your ships AI.” It’s where their last conversation, a couple days ago, had ended.
“The first thing you should know is that Shiro did not get along with them.” Matt began, deciding not to comment on Lance’s mood that had peeked the day they meet and was progressively getting worse and worse. To Matt it was only to be expected, after all Lance had less of a chance to escape than he did.
Lance still hadn’t spoken even the most insignificant of secrets to Zarkon and by now he could tell the usually emotionless and cold leader was becoming impatient with him.
It was probably the claw that cut deeply enough into his cheek that it’ll no doubt scar that gave his impatience away.
He was reminded, once again, that his friends hadn’t come for him. In fact Zarkon mentioned a planet that they’d freed instead. Apparently a planet the Galra deemed practically worthless meant more to them than him.
“I suppose they’re just wanting for you to die.” Zarkon told him. “That way they can replace the disgraceful Paladin you once were with someone capable of piloting a lion.” Lance hadn’t had a response to that as the murderer of countless innocents spat it in his face, clawed finger trailing down from his newly cut right cheek to his throat, squeezing just enough to threaten he could do worse.
“I won’t betray the safety of universe just because my friends don’t care about me.” He tried his hardest not to believe that sentence despite everything Zarkon told him day after day but the words sounded much more honest than he’d thought it would.
It did hurt, thinking they might not have even tried to go after him.
“In my empire you could matter.” Zarkon offered, something he hadn’t done yet. It had been endless threats and pain but never once had he offered something to Lance. The offer didn’t even make the Paladin pause, staying firmly silent. “I could give you power and importance. Even offer training so you aren’t quite so useless.” Even when offering he couldn’t help but be cruel, Lance thought to himself. “Haggar has informed me you’re quite the creature of magic. Surely she and her druids could help you become so much more than you are.”
“Not going to happen.” Lance claimed, stretching his neck slightly with Zarkon’s pressure increased.
“No? Not even if I offered the same to the human?” He asked and Lance tensed up. “He would not be able to have power and influence, but if you were to help me he could be free by your side, out of the cells and untouchable by even Haggar.” Lance considered it, really truly considered it. He wanted Matt to be free and safe and somewhere no one could hurt him.
But he knew it wasn’t that simple. They wouldn’t be ‘free’ so easily. And besides, that freedom could not come at the price of his friends, Matt’s best friend and sister, the fate of the universe.
“No dice.” Lance refused after too long a pause. He wanted to spit in the emperor’s face, tell him to go to hell, but that unlike snark and sass that was disrespect.
Lance felt more claws slice his left cheek as Zarkon reacted. Those ones were unlikely to scar, but they still hurt.
“Take him away. Handcuff him and make sure he’ll live, otherwise do as you wish before returning him to his cell.” The alien overlord instructed his guards, returning to his throne. Lance’s arms were handcuffed behind his back, making the boy wince as his still broken wrist was maneuvered. Once, before all this, he’d have found the pain unbearable. As it was his broken wrist had nothing on Hagar’s experiments and machine.
The guards took him down a route he hadn’t taken before, shoving him and causing him to trip and stumble. As they walked passed a hall of cell’s the guards decided to have voices.
“Even if Lord Zarkon did make you a free man you’d always be human trash.” One of the Galra mocked him. “What a disgusting race, they don’t even desire to be fixed like everyone else for all they’ve done to their planet.” He continued with another harsh shove that sent Lance to the ground despite all his best efforts. “Pathetic.” The guard mocked.
“Screw you, I’m a Selkie not a human.” Lance responded, earning himself a kick to side.
“Yeah, magic aint liked here either.” The second guard, the one who’d kicked him, said.
“Some paladin you are.” The first contiuned, bringing a foot done on Lance’s back and broken wrist. Lance barely kept himself from crying out, grunting as quietly as he could instead. “If the rest of Voltron is like this Lord Zarkon’s going to have no trouble destroying it.” Lance heard mumbles around them, no doubt the other prisoners whispering among themselves, and understood what was happening. Zarkon must think him broken enough to make an example of him, one to crash the hopes of the people Zarkon was no doubt going to send to their deaths.
Too bad for Zarkon that Lance had always put others above himself. So what if it felt like almost every part of his heart had broken to pieces? He had to give these people hope. He turned his head and made eyes with a small prisoner clinging to the legs of another. He was even more firm in his resolve, seeing a child.
“You know your boss had to pull cheap tricks to catch me, right?” Lance hummed. “And besides, all the Paladin’s of Voltron are strong. I think you guys have heard of the champion? Well, he’s fighting for Zarkon’s defeat, and he’s not even the strongest of the Paladins.” That was a lie, he supposed. Shiro was no doubt their strongest fighter but the others were all strong in their own rights, even Keith, even if they all hated him. “And they’re not alone. Planets everywhere are joining them.” He wasn’t talking to the guards, he was grinning at the alien child, looking back at him with hopeful eyes.
The guards set about trying to beat his resolve out of him. After a good few minutes they stopped, properly convinced they’d won. Lance managed, on shaking legs, to stand up despite his bound hands. He grinned back at the guards, at the prisoners. “Do what you want but Voltron will still win.” He said. The guards attempted to hit him again but Lance was quick to dodge this time, his body protesting his movement. “And besides I can pay it back when I get rescued.”
“No one’s coming for you prisoner.” One of the guards claimed.
“Voltron will. Today, tomorrow, in a few months, maybe a few years. It doesn’t matter how long it will take, Voltron won’t stop until everyone here is free.” He grinned.
That child looked at him so hopefully. Even as the guards were quick to take him back to his cell and shove him in, Matt asleep in the corner.
Now, Lance thought as all the bravo and confidence of his act abandoned him, his friends just had to come rescue him and everyone else.
When Lance woke up it was to Matt trailing a finger over the cut on his check, worried expression obvious on his face.
“What happened?” He asked softly. Lance pulled his face away from Matt, looking at a different wall. They didn’t talk about it. But then again, he supposed, most of his worst injuries were under his clothes.
“The same thing that always does. I didn’t tell him what he wanted to know.” Lance shrugged, wincing. “It’s no big deal.”
“Yes it is, you look as bad as I do.” Matt frowned and that stung because he was probably right and it wasn’t fair that Matt was treated like this no doubt every other day while Lance was only this once.
“It’s nothing Matt just drop it.” Lance muttered. He didn’t want to tell Matt that he’d probably feed false hope to the last people that needed it, that he’d almost give all the universe to Zarkon so Matt wouldn’t be hurt anymore even after letting Haggar saw off his leg.
Zarkon and Haggar were right; he was the most undeserving person for the title of Paladin.
“Lance.” Matt frowned a little deeper but Lance refused to look at him. The young scientist sighed after a few more minutes of silence. “Whatever it is Lance, you can tell me.” Lance was still silent for a while. He didn’t want to tell Matt about this, but he’d met Pidge. The Holts were a stubborn bunch.
The selkie sighed, he supposed there was something else he should tell Matt.
“Matt… I’m dying.” He mumbled. Matt looked confused by the confession, waiting for Lance to continue. He went to run a hand through his hair but his wrist didn’t budge. Lance could remember how his sister had explained her shattering heart when her wife and son went missing but he’d never truly understood until recently, still that wasn’t really the way to explain it to a human who had no idea how a selkie worked.
“What do you mean Lance?” Matt prompted when Lance took too long trying to place his words.
“Selkies… we can, die, from sadness.” He mumbled. “And I… I guess I started dying when the team didn’t believe I was a selkie.” He sighed. “But now it’s worse. I’m pretty sure Haggar burnt my pelt Matt, I’m not ever going to be free. The others they’re… I don’t even think they’re looking for me, you know? Like, they should be here by now but instead they’re off saving random planets and that’s so selfish of me, because of course they’d save a planet over me. They don’t trust me why would they want me to come back? Even if they did come save me, would they even believe me? What if they thought I was lying? And my living is making everything worse, if I died Blue’d be able to pick a better Pladdin.” All his words were coming out so fast, before he could stop them.
“I’ve lost the ocean, my pelt, my friends, my freewill. I can’t even glare at the a- j- argh! I can’t give insult Zarkon and Haggar! All because my pelt had to get stolen by the most powerful god damn witch in space. It’s not fair. And I can’t even complain because you have it so much worse, everyone does. So what if I can’t even kiss you like I want to, at least I know I won’t be murdered painfully by two of the universes most feared murderers.” Lance paused to take a deep breath to continue but Matt cut him off. Lance wasn’t sure when he’d looked back at Matt but suddenly he realized he was staring into wide brown eyes.
“Why can’t you kiss me?” Matt asked, mumbling. He flushed once the words were out of his mouth and Lance flushed once he’d realized what he’d said.
“I…” Lance hesitated before sighing. “Selkies are lovers, not fighters, or experiments, or pets.” He started. “When someone steals our pelt we’re, it’s basically the most extremely screwed up 1800’s marriage you can think off. We have to be faithful.” He mumbled. “No matter if we want to or not.” They were silent a moment before Lance continued, speaking softly. “You’re all I have left Matt. Right now you’re the only happiness I have and it’s literally killing me.”
“I won’t leave you Lance.” Matt promised. “And, I’m sure I saw you’re pelt last time I was with… you know.” He added. “So there’s still a chance. We could get out.” Lance didn’t reply, didn’t have the energy. He leant his head on Matt’s shoulder and fell asleep.
The next time Lance woke up Matt was gone. The Paladin panicked at first but there wasn’t anything he could do. He noticed food left out for him but ignored it, he wasn’t going to even attempt to stomach it without being able to use his hands.
Lance guessed two or three days passed. He didn’t see anyone but the robotic guards that patrolled. Not even Haggar or Zarkon.
He was getting incredibly worried about Matt.
He practically jumped up when guards arrived. Haggar wasn’t with them so he wasn’t surprised to find himself entering Zarkon’s thought, nor to find the emperor smirking on his throne.
He was surprised to find the Galran leader holding a terrified Matt by the neck, high enough that Matt’s feet couldn’t touch the ground and he had to cling to Zarkon’s hands to keep himself from choking. Lance was sure it’d take no effort at all for the murderer of countless innocents to snap the human’s neck.
Lance was frozen, staring at Matt who seemed paralysed with fear. He wasn’t even struggling.
He was also bleeding a worrying amount.
“I suggest you tell me something worthwhile or I’ll make an example of him.” Lance gulped at the threat that passed so weightlessly from Zarkon’s mouth.
Oh god, what was he going to do?
“I’m waiting ‘Paladin’.” Zarkon used the term the same way Haggar did, like it was a joke to call Lance that. Given the current situation he all but embraced the mockery. How could he choose between a friend he’d admitted to crushing on and the universe? He knew he had to choose the universe but he didn’t want to. He couldn’t just let Matt die.
Apparently, Matt thought he could. Even terrified and blooding in the hands of the worst mass murder in the entire universe he managed to force a small smile for Lance, the tiniest hint of a thumbs up.
“I’m growing impatient.” Zarkon growled and his grip must have tightened because Matt let out a gasp.
“Wait! Wait, okay! I’ll tell you something!” Lance quickly gave in. Matt’s eyes widened while Zarkon’s smirk broadened. Lance looked to his feet like they had all the answers, frantic and nervous. “We, okay, so, Voltron… we have a contact that gets us information.” He claimed. “I don’t know what species they are or really anything but this name they gave us and I don’t even know if that’s just a codename of not. They’re uh, they’re called Rug Start.” He said. Zarkon frowned.
“That’s not enough for his life.” Zarkon said. Matt started choking.
“Stop!” Lance screamed. “I wasn’t done! They, Voltron, well… If Rug Start sends a message about a meeting place or a mission, they’ll,” He paused, gulping. “They’ll go to it.” Everything was silent for a moment.
“If this is a lie I will tear this boy limb from limb and you’ll be forbidden from looking way.” Zarkon threatened and Lance flinched at the thought.
“I can’t lie, remember?” Lance mumbled after managing to find his voice again.
“I forbid him from it a while ago Lord Zarkon.” Haggar said. Zarkon thought for a moment and then dropped Matt, who screamed as he hit the fall. Lance went to rush to him but a guard yanked him back by his hand cuffs.
“Well then, we’ll have to send Voltron a message from this Rug Start.” Zarkon smirked.
Lance was the one forced to write the message, Matt kept close by as a threat to the Paladin. From the glare he was getting Lance was sure that, if not for the fact that Matt was terrified of Zarkon and Haggar the other would be screaming at him.
Once the message had been sent the two were thrown back into their cell again.
Almost instantly Matt punched Lance harshly in the chest. It didn’t hurt much, Matt didn’t have the strength, but he did hit a bruise and Lance whimpered.
“How could you?!” Matt screamed. “You’re leading Pidge and Shiro right into a trap! And what about the others, huh? The ones meant to be your so called friends!”
“I couldn’t let you die Matt.” Lance said, mumbling.
“And yet you could let my leg get cut off without so much as a second thought!” He accused. Lance flinched, not sure what to say to that. It was true after all.
“Get some sleep Matt, please.” Lance sighed softly.
“Screw you Lance.” Matt growled in response. He sat on the other side of the cell.
Lance pretended not to hear the other cry himself to sleep. He had one thing left. He hoped they understood.
It was impossible to find Haggar without so much of a breadcrumb, and even if they’d had one they still didn’t know how to handle the pelt situation.
So Voltron couldn’t go after Lance and none of them were happy about it.
The whole team was so subdued without their Blue Paladin. The large castle was so quiet, fights broke out so easily, everyone felt guilty and angry and horrible. Especially knowing that, despite everything, the last thing Lance had done was try to warn them.
All their time was spent trying to find a way to get to Lance. Every mission they went on was thought through as they tried to find someone, anyone, who had the slightest hint were Lance might have been taken or where Haggar was. So far nothing had come of any of it.
It was when Coran was on watch duty that the message was received. The royal advisor frowned and instantly called the whole team to him. None of them were asleep so they didn’t take long for everyone to arrive.
“What is it Coran?” Allura asked.
“Have you found Lance?” Hunk asked, he was still so, so hopefully while everyone else had long since given in to frustration. Or maybe he just acted that way for them.
“No… I had to ask. Do any of you know a Rug Start?” Coran asked, frowning. He received similar frowns in response so he gestured to the screen.
TO: GAINT SPACE CATS
FROM: RUG START
MESSAGE: PASSWORD – MACE, LANKY, LOTS, HAPPY, MUM
SO, COOL CATS, NICE TALKING TO YOU AGAIN. SO, LIKE, I’VE GOT SOME GREAT NEWS FOR YOU. FOUND A LOCATION OF THIS IMPORTANT SHIPMENT, I LINKED THE MAP. IT’LL ONLY BE THERE FOR A WEEK SO HURRY AND COME TO THIS LOCATION, KAY?
“What is this?” Allura frowned.
“It’s obviously a trap.” Keith claimed, glaring at the screen like he wanted to murder it.
“Pidge…” Hunk trailed off, hesitating to voice what he thought that was.
“Yeah Hunk, I know.” Pidge mumbled.
“Do you know who this is Pidge?” Shiro frowned, looking at the two geniuses who quickly came up to the screen.
“It’s…” Pidge frowned before taking a deep breath. “Back in the Garrison Lance used to like do a lot of things we weren’t allowed to. We also liked doing it in front of the Garrison’s faces. He’d start conversations about the next or last time we snuck off campus or he’d pass us notes.” She explained. “He came up with this system, he’d use the opposite of a word to name it so no one would know what we were talking about. Mace was what he decided what he was called. I was Lots because apparently Pidge means smidge and Hunk was Lanky.”
“Then whose Happy and Mum? And whose Rug Start?” Shiro frowned.
“I… I’d guess Happy is Keith and Mum is you but I don’t know who Rug Start could be.” Pidge frowned.
“The location on the map isn’t anything important. Actually it’s probably the best place to have a sneak attack.” Coran reported.
“We could track the message though.” Pidge said. “I could at least. Find where it came from.”
“And that would lead us to Lance?” Keith asked.
“It should.” The youngest Paladin nodded. There was silence.
“Pidge, are you sure this is Lance?” Shiro asked.
“Yes. I’m sure.” Pidge nodded. Shiro hesitated only a moment before nodding back.
“Alright get to work.” Pidge didn’t wait for him to finish the sentence before she got to work. The other Paladin’s weren’t sure what to do. For the first hour they stayed. After that Allura went for breakfast, taking everyone but Coran and Pidge with her. After breakfast Keith and Shiro went to train and Allura began making sure the castles systems were at peek condition. Hunk returned to Pidge and Coran, giving them their share of breakfast.
“Hey Pidge.” Hunk spoke to the coder softly as not to enlist a violent reaction.
“It better be important Hunk.” She snapped.
“Do you reckon… Holt kinda sounds like halt, right, and that means stop. I guess I mean, starts probably the opposite of halt, right?” Pidge froze for a second. “And rugs and mats are kinda just two different words for the same thing but he was probably under a lot of pressure, right? So maybe…” Hunk didn’t need to finish the sentence. Pidge once more began to follow the breadcrumbs to the prison where she knew Lance, and maybe Matt, wanted for them.
Hunk went to Blue, and then his own lion making sure Yellow was ready to fight.
In his cell, if Lance had been in a better mood, the Blue Paladin would have smiled.
Who’d ever heard of a selkie unable to lie anyway?
Notes:
Some Selkie Lore:
According to some lore, Selkie's are immortal however they can die from sadness.
Also all selkie lore mentions selkie becoming the thiefs faithful wife, keyword faithful.I wasn't kidding when I said Lance is basically Haggar's wife
This chapter is 4,200 words and that makes my nerd heart happy.
Chapter 10: A Rescue Most Needed
Summary:
One time the team made it up to Lance
Notes:
Some notes on the code names:
- Hunk is Lanky because a hunk is a hella attractive muscluar man and Lance wasn't gonna even jokingly call his best friend ugly
- Pidge is Tall because Lance had no idea what a Pidge is and by the time he thought of something better/less obvious it was too late, Tall had stuck
- Lance is Mace cause whats more different then a long spike than a ball on a chain or stick?
- Keith is Happy cause Lance likes to tease that Keith's Emo
- Shiro is Mum because Shiro is the space dad, long hand he's Earth Mum
- Allura would be Repeal because her name contains the word Lure and also so Lance can make a joking flirt about her luring him in. If she ever dates Shiro she'll become Earth Dad
- Coran would be SoWalk simply because of the Ran in his name
- Matt is Rug because Lance has no idea what the oppisite of a Mat is and also Rug Start sounded alien enough
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
When Matt woke up he wouldn’t even look at Lance. The Blue Paladin wanted nothing more than to tell his cellmate the truth at the face Matt was giving the floor. He looked hopeless and hurt, and Lance hated that it was his fault Matt looked like that. He couldn’t risk telling him though, because that would risk his lives of his friends, and Matt. So instead Lance beared the silence and tried not to let it bug him. Voltron would come soon, he told himself, his team would come and Matt would realize that he hadn’t betrayed anyone.
He told himself the same thing the next day.
The third day, he guessed, when Voltron hadn’t come yet it was harder to tell himself his friends would come. Did they not understand? He thought he’d made it as clear as he could when he added the code names for Shiro and Keith. Maybe he should have added one for Coran and Allura to? Maybe mentioned the Garrison?
Or maybe they had understood and that’s why they weren’t coming. The thought made Lance flinch. The idea that maybe his friends knew exactly who was messaging them and didn’t want to save him made him feel sick. They wouldn’t do that, right? Shiro wouldn’t want anyone to face what he had, right? Even… even if they did well they surely understood that Rug Start was Matt, right? And Pidge would definitely want them to save Matt. There was still four days until his ruse was found out.
Unless they didn’t believe him about Matt being there.
The fears and uncertainties were starting to make Lance feel sick. He wanted to throw up but he hadn’t eaten in… he couldn’t remember actually. He should probably eat. Actually there was still two bowls of food there, hadn’t Matt eaten yet?
“You should eat.” Lance said, voice hoarse from disuse.
“Don’t talk to me.” Matt snapped.
“Please Matt, you need to eat.” Lance mumbled, he couldn’t really talk it wasn’t like he’d been eating.
“What do you care? You just sent my sister to her death.” Lance flinched at the glare he was being given.
“Pidge isn’t going to die.” Lance mumbled. “The teams better than that.”
“It doesn’t change that you sent them into a trap!” Matt snapped. A protest was on the tip of his tongue but Lance held it back. He couldn’t tell Matt, he didn’t know if anyone else could hear them and he couldn’t risk it if someone was. And he wasn’t even sure they were coming anyway.
“I’m sorry.” He mumbled instead. What if they didn’t come? Would Zarkon kill Matt as brutally as he threatened? Lance didn’t doubt he was capable of it.
“Whatever.” Matt muttered. He’d die hating Lance too.
“I… I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you but I couldn’t trade your life, not for anything.” Lance mumbled. That was the best he could manage without revealing anything. Maybe they’d come for Matt and leave Lance. Lance could handle that, he supposed.
He shut his eyes and slept for the first time since that moment in the throne room, not quite sure he’d wake up.
Lance didn’t wake up when the explosions started. Matt was still awake, trying to convince himself that his sister wouldn’t fall for the trap he was sure Lance had sent her and the others towards. He couldn’t believe that Lance had done that to them.
The explosions that rang out shook him out of his thoughts. It sounded like a full scale battle had begun outside the ship, which is exactly what had happened. Confused, Matt got as close to the bars as he dared to try to see even a little of what was going on. He could see the soldiers that still remained on the ship running around, hear them shouting about an attack, but nothing more than that.
Who was attacking?
It couldn’t be… Matt bit his lip at the thought. He should have thought of this, he and Pidge used to play games while Matt was away. The younger of the two would figure out where he was by the source of his messages, or cheating and hacking into the records.
But…
Oh wow. Matt felt an ass. What had Lance done that hadn’t been about the bigger picture? Nothing. He should have thought Lance lying was a possibility. He should have given Lance the benefit of the doubt.
“Lance.” He said, speaking softly. “Lance they’re here.” He turned when the boy didn’t respond. A cold dread gripped him all of a sudden. What had Lance said? That a selkie could die from sadness? That Matt was one of the last things he had left. Thinking back now, the last words he’d spoken had been suspiciously alike to a goodbye. He turned from the bars, brushing his hand by one and gasping as it burnt. He was quick to drop to his knees next to Lance, fingers resting against his neck. His pulse was still there, faint but still there and Matt let out the breath he was holding. “Lance, wake up, please.” He tried, shaking Lance lightly. “Please, they’re here Lance.” He added, relaxing only when blue eyes fluttered open, slowly, to look at him.
“Matt?” He mumbled. “What’s going on?” He asked, taking note of all the noise and chaos.
“They’re here. Voltron’s come to save us.” Matt answered. “God I’m so sorry I doubted you.” He mumbled, burying his head in Lance’s shoulder. Lance relaxed and wrapped an arm around him.
“It’s okay.” He whispered softly.
“The guy said he was down this way.” They heard someone say. “Lance where are you?” It was the Red Paladin calling out.
“In here!” Matt called back. “He’s in here!” He stood up, walking back to the door. He was limping, Lance wasn’t sure if the new leg still hurt or if it was slightly too big or small or if it was just a habit now for Matt.
“How are we going to- oh.” Pidge and Keith had appeared in sight, staring at the cell door that shut off during the former’s sentence. There was a pause where no one did anything, everyone staring at each other, before Pidge threw her arms around Matt.
“Katie.” Matt breathed, smiling and holding their little sister close. “You cut your hair again.” He commented.
“It’s uh, a long story.” Pidge said. “Oh my god is that blood?!” The two siblings took stock of each other while Keith went to Lance. Lance was staring wide eyed, not sure what to do.
“Come on Lance, time to go home.” Keith smiled at him, helping Lance to his feet. Lance felt like he couldn’t breathe. It was too much all at once, an overload of happy and hope with that terrifying fear at the forefront.
Did they believe him yet? Would they believe him? Would Keith roll his eyes if Lance said he needed to get his pelt?
“N-no, no poder.” He managed to stumble his way through the words of his native tongue, barely able to take the breath in to speak. He could feel himself shaking and he hadn’t it. He was making a fool of himself in front of a team he believed already considered him a failure. Keith looked confused, not understanding, and looked between Lance and the Holts.
“His pelt.” Matt supplied in Lance’s place, making the selkie tense up. “Lance can’t leave without his pelt.” There was a protective tone in his voice.
“We know.” Pidge said.
“We’re going to get it we just don’t know where it is.” Keith added. Lance couldn’t believe the words he was hearing. They knew? Did that mean they believed him? Were they just humouring him? Maybe they thought him delusional?
“It’s… the witch’s room, I can lead the way I remember it.” Matt offered. Pidge and Keith nodded and the group began to walk. Pidge held Matt as much as she could but Keith had to all but carry Lance to the source of his nightmares.
“Here.” Matt answered, though he hesitated to move forward. Pidge took the lead instead, opening the door quickly and looking around. She almost felt the need to throw up. Lance and Matt hung back, letting the Paladin’s go first. Neither wanted to enter the room un-affectionately named Haggar’s workshop. They forced themselves to though, flinching at almost everything they saw.
The four tore the place apart trying to find the white fur but they couldn’t find it anywhere. Just as Lance was about to give up and accept it had been burnt the druid of his nightmares appeared in the centre of the room. She seemed furious but Lance’s attention was drawn to her hand where she held his pelt.
“Selkie, I forbid you from letting them leave here alive.” She said, tone even but dark. Lance shook his head, watching his friends tense from the corners of his eyes.
“You can’t.” His voice was even, something that surprised himself. Lance let out a scream as Haggar dripped something onto the pelt. It felt like his pelt was in the middle of a fire. He thought he heard someone shout his name and Lance was vaguely aware of the person being sent into the wall by Haggar’s magic. Pidge maybe?
“Then I will burn it. You’ll be bond to me forever and I will continue my research when Lord Zarkon conquers your world.” She threatened. Lance gulped from his spot, crumbled on the floor and only vaguely aware of when he got there.
“Burn it then.” He said, once more his voice that unexpected calm. “I won’t fight them.”
“So be it.” Haggar’s hand lit up in a dazzle of flames, purple flames. Lance could feel himself shaking.
Apparently the Red Paladin’s presence had slipped both their minds because the two of them were taken aback when Keith rushed forward, grabbing Lance’s pelt in the same moment he went to strike Haggar. The druid was forced to teleport away, not able to take the pelt with her. Keith threw it in Lance’s general direction when she reappeared, the Red Paladin quickly heading towards her to attack again.
“Lance! Take it!” Keith snapped when he turned his head to spot Lance staring at the pelt but not reaching for it. His sword sliced through the air but was blocked by a stream of purple lightening.
“I can’t.” Lance mumbled. He wanted to, desperately, but throwing a pelt towards a selkie didn’t count as giving it to them willing.
“What do you mean you can’t?!” Keith demanded. Lance looked up to see that Pidge had joined the fight and Matt was on the opposite side of Haggar, neither in a position to give him his pelt. This was it, Lance thought, this was where the line was drawn and his team was about to admit they were humouring him.
“It has to be given to him.” Pidge answered when it became apparent that Lance wasn’t going to answer. Keith let out an ‘oh’, not cruelly and without any hint of the slightest rolling eyes. Lance was more than a little surprised. Haggar disappeared and reappeared close to the pelt. Lance couldn’t stop her as she reached for it. This time Pidge attacked with her bayard, swinging the roped edge towards the druid. Keith barrel rolled, taking the pelt.
“Now Hunk!” He screamed into his helmet. “Don’t hold your breath.” He instructed Lance. Lance frowned, confused, before the head of the yellow lion broke into the ship. Hunk rushed out and grabbed Lance while Pidge continued to fight with Haggar, her height and long distance weapon working in her favour. Matt ran, as best as he could, for the Lion and Keith shouted for Pidge to join them. Once all five were on, Yellow was quick to pull her head from the Galra ship.
“Wait, there were other prisoners!” Lance said, remembering the cells he’d passed days before.
“God you idiot.” Keith snapped. “Think about yourself for once Lance! You’re injured; we need to get you to the castle and into a cyropod.” Lance looked to Pidge hoping for an actual answer, the youngest sighed from where she sat slumped against Matt.
“We found them while we were looking for you. Red and Green took them to the castle.” She told him and Lance relaxed.
“I’m so glad you’re back buddy.” Hunk grinned. Lance hesitated. He couldn’t go far unless Keith handed over the pelt he was holding protectively. Luckily the Red Paladin caught his staring and sighed.
“Here, I’m giving you this willing.” He said, holding it out for Lance. “Will that work or…” He trailed off but Lance grinned up at him as he took back his second skin.
“That’s perfect.” He said. His fur looked... still worse for wear but in a different way to before. Burns and cuts and missing fur littered its form but they weren’t in the exact same spots as they had been when Lance had seen it last. Lance frowned at it but decided to let it go, the important thing was that he had his pelt back. He let the white fur drape over him and sighed contently.
The adrenaline of his escape was quick to leave his system and in its place came the pain, exhaustion, and hunger that Lance hadn’t let catch up with him in the prison. Now though, in the comfort of his pelt and with Blue close enough to purr her welcome in his head, Lance was too content to stay in fight or flight mode. His eyes slipped shut and the darkness of sleep took him almost instantly.
Notes:
Guest appearance from Keith's father because hell yes Galran Keith
Chapter 11: Home Sweet Castleship
Summary:
One time Lance tries to remember what it's like to feel part of the team.
Notes:
So we're nearing the end of the story guys sorry this update took so long I was redoing the cover art for an orignal story of mine which you can (and should cause it'd be much appricated) read here: https://www.wattpad.com/story/85079972-imperfect
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Lance could confidently say he despised the cyropods. The first time he’d been in one reminded him of almost dying, of his team being more concerned about time than making sure he didn’t fall, of the truth circle where they all called him a liar. The second time he’d been in one came with memories of the castle trying to kill him, of the terrifying sensation of almost being blown out an airlock, of Allura having to destroy the last fragments of her father, her planet, her whole life before Voltron.
They weren’t fond memories.
The third time he stumbled out of one all he could think off was purple walls and the constant sound of electricity. Strong arms caught him and he thought of the Galra first, flinching away and hitting the pod again.
“Lance, calm down.” The voice that spoke was familiar but distinctively not Galran. Lance’s first thought was that it was Matt but Matt hated him, didn’t he? And besides, his second thought was that the voice was not Matt.
Then it came back.
Lance rose a hand to the comfortable weight on his shoulders and felt fur. He let out the breath he’d been holding and actually looked at the room he was in. It was bright, not naturally so but not harshly like the prison. It was large, with room to breathe and stand and rest against the form of a cyropod without fear.
And there were people, too. Lance wasn’t sure if he was dreaming or dead because this couldn’t be real. Hunk, Pidge, Allura, Keith, Shiro, and Coran all stood around him with the biggest grins, like they’d won the lottery. But that couldn’t be possible, because they were looking at him.
“Guys?” He managed to mumble, voice hoarse and quiet in a way that made him wonder how long he’d been asleep for. The word, apparently, was the only thing the group needed. Suddenly Lance felt himself being bombarded. Arms were wrapped around him, bodies were close enough that he could feel heat surrounding him, heat like that that seemed to radiate off the prison cells. They were talking but he couldn’t make out words just a constant buzz, like the electric bars. He felt trapped he couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t move, they were holding him too tight.
They were touching his pelt.
“Guys, back off! He needs to be able to breath.” The voice was strong and familiar but still too human to be Galran. The arms and bodies back off and Lance was sure he could hear ‘sorry’s and curses in between the buzzing sound. Lance started to take deeper breaths, not sure when he’d started hyperventilating, or when he’d curled in on himself, or when he’d started clutching his pelt tightly against him.
“Lance.” His name. His name was so good to hear, no one but Matt called him by his name on the ship, it was always ‘Paladin’, or ‘Selkie’. Oh god Haggar had turned two words of pride into insults into the names of a prisoner oh god oh god oh god oh g-
“You’re alright Lance, you’re safe now.” Lance looked past his fear and his realizations. There was a cold presence on his arm, not touching his pelt but touching his human skin. It wasn’t a human hand, it was Galran and metal but that was okay because the Galra didn’t use hands like that. They gave them to other prisoners. Like Shiro.
Like Matt.
Lance felt himself collapse against a solid chest, sobs racking threw him. The cold hand, the metal hand, rubbed his arm genteelly.
“Shiro.” Lance whispered against the chest.
“I’m right here.” The head of Voltron, in every sense, confirmed and Lance relaxed a little more because he needed to hear that. He needed the affirmation that this was who he thought he was, not an illusion. The illusions weren’t solid, nor did their tones lack in hatred and malice. Shiro, so far, was three for three.
He was safe and sound; in a place they wouldn’t hurt him. All the emotions he’d refused to let himself succumb to were catching up with him and for the life of him Lance couldn’t hold them back anymore. He sobbed into Shiro’s chest and as he did the elder hummed, Lance able to feel the sound. At the back of his mind a second voice joined in calming him, Blue’s purring always good at doing just that. Shiro didn’t touch his pelt, and his metal hand kept the heat from suffocating the younger’s form.
“Matt.” He managed to choke out at one point.
“He’s still in a cyropod, the one right next to yours.” Shiro answered softly and that was enough for the moment.
When Lance had finally calmed down he found that he and Shiro were on the ground, Lance vaguely remembered Coran forcing the rest of Voltron to leave to give Lance some privacy and he was glad. He couldn’t believe he’d freaked out on them like that. They’d saved him, him that didn’t deserve it, and the first thing he did was go into a panic attack.
“Feeling better?” Shiro asked and Lance was so glad he didn’t ask the Blue Paladin if he was alright, he couldn’t lie to Shiro right now. Lance nodded a little, because he was feeling better, at least he didn’t feel like he’d break if his team touched him now.
“I’m sorry.” He mumbled out, not sure if he was apologizing for the freak out or being kidnapped or the no doubt risky rescue mission, or his less than secure and safe method of telling them where he was or if he was apologizing for all of it or something else he couldn’t currently recall.
“You have nothing to be sorry for Lance.” Shiro assured, in that same tone that he’d used to tell the others to give him space, the tone that left no room for argument. So Lance didn’t argue, but that didn’t mean he agreed. “I’m so glad you’re home again. We all are.” Was this really home? The sea was always home and this ship in the middle of space was not the sea. Some said home was where the heart was but was his heart here? Blue was here, his pelt was here, a lot of people he cared about were here because no matter how much he was sure he didn’t deserve them or that they didn’t trust him he did care deeply for his team.
Yes. This flying castle somewhere in space far, far away from Earth could be his home.
“Me too.” Lance said, and he did believe that.
They sat for a while longer before Shiro suggested they see the others. Lance nodded, taking Shiro’s offered help in regaining his feet. Before they left he looked to Matt and breathed a shy of relief to see he was healing.
Everyone had waited just outside the room. Well, everyone but Keith. Lance tensed when they were all suddenly there but they didn’t crowd him this time. It was silent for a moment before Hunk stepped forward.
“I missed you so much buddy.” He grinned and Lance smiled back. A small part of him didn’t believe that but the whispering insecurity wasn’t half as loud as his own joy at seeing the man who’d been his best friend for as long as he could remember.
“I missed you too Hunk.” He smiled back, expression a little forced and a little strained but the closest to a real smile he’d had in a few days. Hunk took a step forward before hesitating, looking to Lance for permission. Lance hesitated a moment before slipping his pelt from his shoulders, the fabric peeling off where it had been attached to real skin, and letting it instead rest around his waist, holding it there. Then he nodded to his friend. Hunk hesitated a moment more, all of them staring at his pelt in a way that made Lance flinch, before the yellow pilot moved forward and wrapped his arms around Lance. Lance hugged him back with one hand, taking in breaths of the smell of Earth that seemed to cling to Hunk, despite their distance from the planet.
When Hunk pulled away he was replaced by Coran. “It’s so good to see you Lance, the castle hasn’t quite been the same without you.” He grinned and Lance gave him a slightly sheepish one back. He doubted that was a bad thing, but he kept that to himself.
“Yeah.” Pidge agreed. “It’s been too quiet.” She added, there was a tense tone to her voice that Lance couldn’t quite decipher the meaning behind. Coran squeezed Lance one more time before releasing him. There was a momentary pause and then Pidge had all but leapt into Lance’s arm, Shiro’s arm catching his shoulder so the two didn’t fall. She sniffled against him and Lance was… shocked to say the least. Hesitantly he wrapped an arm around her.
“Pidge?” He mumbled and the girl buried her face into his form.
“Thank you.” She whispered. “You brought Matt back. That message was, so risky and stupid and brilliant and I’m so sorry that it took so long to trace. I’m so sorry I couldn’t find you without it.” She mumbled, sniffling again. Lance wasn’t sure how to respond. He didn’t deserve the thanks, it was them that found him and brought Matt back, Lance had barely participated in that. And he’d cost Matt his leg, almost his life. He didn’t deserve her thanks.
“I missed you Pidge.” He whispered back instead of responding to her words. “Your hair looks great long.” Lance added because she was growing it out and it was even longer than Keith’s at this point. The comment earned him a lightly chuckle and a light shove as she let go.
“I’m glad it’s got the McClain approval.” She smiled, only a small trace of teasing in her voice.
“It’s wonderful to see you well Lance.” Allura cut in and the Blue Paladin was glad, he was struggling to find a witty response. When did words get so hard?
Probably when Haggar forbid him from speaking them any way he wanted.
But he didn’t have to obey her anymore, did he? His smile was just a little less forced as he realized it.
“It’s always wonderful to see you princess.” He grinned. “And can I just say that Lord Fartkon smells, is a big bag of dildos, and couldn’t manage an empire even if it consisted of nothing more than a couple dustmites.” Lance added. He couldn’t make himself say Haggar’s name, even now knowing he could disrespect her all he wanted, he just… couldn’t. The team looked confused and Lance’s smile faltered.
He didn’t want to explain to them what Haggar had forbidden, wasn’t sure if they did believe he was a Selkie, even after the rescue, and if they did he wasn’t sure how far that belief would extend.
“Well, I certainly agree to that.” Coran nodded in a way that he possibly thought sagely. “Perhaps that is what we can have be a part of the tale of his defeat. Voltron defeats Zarkon, known bag of smelling dildos.” Lance couldn’t help but laugh at his words, and soon everyone was laughing as well and for one moment everything felt right, so right and okay.
And then Lance remembered Matt was in a cyropod and Keith wasn’t there. Did Keith not actually care that he was back? Probably, Lance thought. Not bitterly, not angrily, instead with a level of acceptance he probably shouldn’t have.
“Shiro, you go get Keith. Hunk and I whipped up a special welcome home feast for Lance and I fear we’ll have too many left overs if not all Paladin’s are in attendance.” Coran announced and Lance’s stomach growled.
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but even food goo would be better than the stuff the Galra give their prisoners.” He joked although he couldn’t really remember what the prisoner food tasted like. Or the last time he’d eaten actually. He decided not to mention that.
“Yeah, it tasted like soggy newspaper used for a kittens litter box at best.” Shiro agreed. “I’ll get Keith and met you all in the dining room.”
Lance walked with Hunk to the dining hall, glad that everyone else held conversation in place of him. He added comments every so often but it was nothing compared to what he was like before all of this started, before he’d told them his true identity.
The spread looked amazing, especially for the standard of space food that Lance was used to. Soon after they sat down Keith and Shiro joined them. Keith took the spot next to Lance without a thought, no one else having sat there yet.
They began to eat and Lance was surprised that the food tasted just as good as it looked, perhaps even better. He had to be dreaming.
“No one pitch me, I don’t want to wake up.” He said. Almost immediately Keith pitched his shoulder and Lance yelped. “I said don’t pitch me.” He glared.
“Well, now you know it’s not a dream.” Keith shrugged, taking his own share of the food. He was right of course, and Lance was sure illusions couldn’t do actual damage and the dead can’t feel pain. He smiled as he returned to eating.
“I don’t understand.” Allura frowned. Shiro leaned across the table to explain it to her and Keith turned to Lance slightly.
“I’m glad you’re back Lance.” He said, no hint of anything but honesty in his tone. Lance almost completely believed him.
Lance couldn’t manage to eat more than a plate of food, and even then he felt a little sick.
“I think I’m going to head for a shower.” He announced, standing up. He was still in the Galran prison clothes and he wanted out of them.
“I can walk you there.” Hunk offered, although almost everyone else but Shiro seemed ready to offer as well.
“No, Hunk, it’s okay. Thanks man. And thanks for the food.” Lance forced a smile. He didn’t want to be escorted, not here. It’d be the same as there. He also wanted to be away from all the noise. It was too much too fast, and though he was glad and thankful to be home he needed a moment to himself.
“If you’re sure.” Hunk hesitated, sitting back down.
“He’ll be fine Hunk.” Shiro assured. He smiled at Lance, gave him a nod, and Lance relaxed a little before leaving and heading straight to his room. He almost got lost in the way but soon Lance reached it and slipped inside. He hesitated to close the door, to lock himself inside, and instead opted to leave it open before slipping into his bathroom. This time Lance did close the door.
Lance almost screamed when he looked in the mirror, not recognizing the person reflected back at him. Their cheeks were sunken in, their eyes dull, their hair was clumped and unkempt, and their lips had a worryingly blue tinge. It took Lance too long to realize he was looking himself.
Lace sighed, running a hand through his hair. He wasn’t going to cry again, he refused to.
A soft purring in the back of his mind helped him calm enough to look away from the unfamiliar face. He hesitated to get undressed, hands resting against his pelt. He needed to wash his human skin but he didn’t want to remove the second one.
Lance took a deep breath and checked the door was locked, double checked it, triple checked, before removing the pelt and resting it in a place he could watch from the shower. He wasn’t nearly as hesitant removing his other clothes and slipping into the shower.
It’s amazing how refreshed hot, running water could make you feel. He spent a good hour, maybe two, under the spray. Washing his body and his hair. There were scars still, on his shoulder and where his chest had been cut open most noticeably but there was also discolouring on his chest that didn’t look like a scar but felt like one. Lance almost wished there was more of a scar. That spot was where the machine had pulled his soul out of his body, the spot Haggar forced changed pieces, corrupted pieces, back. He didn’t realize he was clawing at the section until he heard Blue in the back of his mind. Calling him to her. He moved and realized he’d scratched his chest enough for it to be bleeding lightly.
Lance got out, not bothering to dry off. He took his pelt, wrapping it around him. It stuck, clinging comfortably to his skin, although it looked like it flowed over him like a robe would. Lance didn’t bother to put on clothes. Leaving his room in his pelt he made his way to Blue.
The lion greeted him calmly. He felt her joy at seeing him, her pride at seeing him in his pelt, every happy emotion she felt upon seeing him. He moved over to her paw, leant against it and the metal moved to rub like a normal sized kitten would do with their head.
‘I’d never replace you’
It was impossible not to trust Blue, not to believe Blue.
“I missed ya girl.” Lance sighed. He entered the cockpit and sat with Blue, bonding again after so long apart. This was good, he thought, he could handle this and then maybe it’d be easier to handle the others and take things one step at a time.
Blue approved of the thought.
When Lance finally left Blue it was to enter the medical bay. Inside he found Shiro, staring ahead at Matt in the cyropod. The same reason Lance had come by.
“Shiro?” He spoke from the door. Shiro tensed as he turned but relaxed at the sight of Lance.
“I told Pidge I’d watch him while she went for a shower. She’s barely left this room since it happened.” He told Lance. The Blue Paladin nodded and stood next to him. He watched Matt, wishing the other would open his eyes and see the world again but knowing it was better they wait.
Lance looked over to Shiro and noticed his eyes staring at Matt’s leg. The one that matched his arm.
“That, uh, that wasn’t your fault, you know.” Lance mumbled, looking away.
“I’m the one that hurt him.” Shiro replied, mumbling slightly.
“I know.” Lance sighed. “But… Haggar gave me a choice. Betray you guys or watch Matt’s leg get chopped off. I couldn’t betray you. So it’s not your fault.” He could still see it all, the blood and bone, and he could still hear all the screaming. “And he’s not mad at you for hurting him, he knows you had to.” He added, more as an afterthought to distract himself from his other thoughts.
They were silent, watching Matt heal.
“It’s not your fault either.” Shiro said softly afterwards.
The silence continued until Pidge returned. She seemed surprised to find Lance there as well, watching Matt. Her eyes drifted over his pelt for a moment before she spoke.
“You should get some rest Lance.” She suggested but Lance shook his head.
“How long until Matt wakes up?” He asked.
“15 hours.” Pidge responded.
“Then I’ll get some rest in 15 hours. I just…” He sighed, running a hand through his hair.
“We get it.” Shiro nodded. The silence returned.
An hour or so later they’d all sat, and Pidge began to tell stories of Matt as a child. Shiro joined in with stories of what Matt was like on his trips and Lance occasionally added bits that the two left out that Matt had told him when he’d told the same stories.
Lance relaxed slightly, tucked into his pelt. Matt would be alright, he’d wake up and find out that he was home and even if he still hated Lance that would be okay. He had every right to hate Lance.
Right now nothing was fixed, Lance was still sure his team didn’t need him even if he was starting to think they didn’t hate him as much as he’d thought. He couldn’t be certain they trusted him yet either. But sitting there, sharing stories and knowing for certain that Matt was safe, that he himself was safe, something felt like it was starting to mend.
Notes:
Some more Selkie lore:
Some legends tell that once a selkie's pelt is returned they can not be found by the one who stole it for 7 years.
Haggar is unaware of this factALSO AGAIN I'D BE GRATEFUL IF YOU HAD A LOOK AT THIS THING: https://www.wattpad.com/story/85079972-imperfect
Chapter 12: An Irreplaceable Feeling
Summary:
One time Lance proves himself.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
When Matt’s cyropod opened he stumbled out and into Shiro, who caught him without a thought.
“Hey Matt.” He smiled down at the other who blinked the sleep from his eyes before smiling up at Shiro.
“Hey Shiro.” He said, hugging his best friend. Since waking up Lance had discovered that very few of the prisoners had gone in the cyropods in the same moment they arrived. Lance had, because he’d passed out, but Matt had had time for a reunion with Shiro and Pidge before he’d been put under. He’d been injured but the druids had stabilized him while Lance had been sending the message to the team, a ‘reward’ for Lance’s cooperation as Zarkon had put it.
“Feeling better?” Pidge asked, quickly at her brother’s side. Matt grinned, wrapping an arm around her.
“Heaps Katie.” He smiled. They stayed that way a long moment before eventually breaking away. When they did, Matt finally got a look at the others in the room. Hunk stood, smiling, and next to him Lance was curled in on himself slightly, eyes focused firmly on the fall. For all he knew Matt still believed that Lance had betrayed them, even if that ‘betrayal’ had led to their saving.
That possibility flew out the window when Matt’s arms were suddenly around him, holding him tightly and burying his head in Lance’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry Lance.” Lance had put clothes on but his pelt still hung from his shoulders, he had barely taken it off since getting out of the cyropod much less let it out of his sight. He’d let no one else touch it, either. But Lance found he didn’t really mind that Matt was running his hands through the fur. “I should have known you wouldn’t betray them.” Lance was silent a moment, wrapping his own arms around Matt.
“I’m glad you’re okay.” He said softly in place of responding to the apology he didn’t think he deserved from Matt.
“Is this your pelt?” Matt asked, pulling away enough to look at the fur that meant the world to Lance.
“Yeah.” Lance nodded, a little shyly. “It’s, uh, not quite what it used to be.” It didn’t look as bad as it had when Haggar last held it, the cyropod having been surprisingly capable of healing the magical fabric, but it wasn’t flawless. Where once the fabric had been toren or cut it now was bumped and scared, where it had been burnt the fur was now discoloured, and in spots the fur had had to grow back it had grown slightly bristled instead of unnaturally soft.
“It’s awesome.” Matt grinned. Lance couldn’t help but blush a bit. His team had done their best to ignore the fabric, hearing such a compliment made his heart swell.
“Come on, let’s have some breakfast then we need to meet with the others.” Hunk announced, offering a plate of left overs for everyone. Allura, Coran, and Keith had all gone to help the other prisoners who were waking.
The five sat down and began to eat. Almost instantly Matt and Pidge began to discuss the workings of the cyropods, Hunk joining in when his mouth wasn’t full. Shiro and Lance both had no idea what they were talking about, eating in silence. Lance watched Matt and he couldn’t figure out how the other was handling it. The first thing Lance had done upon exiting the cyropod was breakdown but Matt seemed fine. Come to think of it, Lance couldn’t believe how well Shiro had handled everything. Shiro had been a gladiator for a year and the moment he got back he was swept back into a life of war and fighting, probably incredibly alike to the one he’d escaped from.
Lance had always respected Shiro but somehow that amount of respect managed to grow knowing how the other must feel about this all.
“What’s wrong?” Speak of the devil, apparently. Lance looked up from his food, which he’d been glaring at, to face Shiro.
“I just… I have no idea how you’ve been able to handle… well, everything.” He admitted, looking back down to his plate.
“I’m not handling it all that well, but I know I need to put that aside for everything else.” Shiro said, talking almost too soft to hear. “Actually I’m glad we’re in space and not on Earth. I don’t know how I would’ve handled trying to go back to a normal life, I don’t think I could’ve.” He added, running a hand through his hair. He finished his plate and sat it down, smiling at Lance. “I want you to know that I’m here for you though Lance.” Shiro said with a smile. “I know I haven’t been the best to you, none of us have. But I promise I’m here for you now.” Lance gulped slightly, nodding.
It was the first time any of them had even indirectly mentioned the Selkie thing.
15 minutes later the group left the medical bay and headed towards Allura. Upon their arrival everything froze. The prisoners they’d rescued turned to them and stared, more specifically they stared at Lance. Lance tensed as one of the many stepped forward, not sure what to expect and completely clueless about what was happening. Did they hate him? Had he done something wrong?
“Praise for the Blue Paladin.” Lance’s eyes widened slightly. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting but that wasn’t it. Behind the prisoner the others cheered.
“Praise for saving us.” Lance heard them cheering as someone, Hunk, lead him closer to the crowd. Someone’s palm rested against his arm. He didn’t deserve that, it was the others of Voltron that had saved them not him.
“Praise for giving us hope.” Someone else called, once more receiving cheers. But that hope could have been false, why were they praising him?
“Praise for standing against Zarkon.” A third person shouted and the cheers were almost deafening.
“Praise for the Selkie, Praise for the Blue Paladin.” They began to chant. Lance wasn’t sure what to do. He felt too crowded, too hot, like he didn’t deserve the attention. A hand, alien in texture and shape but probably a hand, grabbed his fingers and tugged genteelly. Lance looked down and saw the alien child he’d seen days before.
“Thank you.” The alien and Lance smiled back. He sank to his knees to give the alien a hug.
“You’re safe now.” Lance smiled at them. The cheering once more exploded.
It took a while for everyone to calm down and it probably didn’t help that the others were all grinning as they asked for quiet. When order was finally regained the aliens all spoke to the Princess or Coran before coming to Lance to thank him personally and then preparing themselves for travel. Their ships course was set for a settlement outside the Galra’s reach although a few lucky souls would, from there, be able to head home to their planets either freed by Voltron or not yet fully controlled. Lance was happy to say the child, their name Ma’irj, was one of those few.
Things settled by the night and almost everyone seemed to be relaxed and happy at dinner, even Lance seemed to be acting alike to his old self and everyone was better for it. It wasn’t until the group retired for the night that issues arose.
Matt had been offered a room near Pidge but far away from Lance. He’d agreed but both were on edge after it.
It was stupid, Lance told himself. They weren’t on the Galra ship, Matt being out of his sight didn’t mean he was being tortured.
And yet it unnerved him to not be able to pinpoint Matt’s location.
He tried not to show how relieved he was when he found Matt, holding a pillow and a blanket, outside the door he hadn’t closed since returning.
“Can I, uh, can I stay with you?” Matt asked. “I just… I’d rather spend the night with someone else.” He mumbled, looking at his feet.
“Of course, that’s fine.” Lance agreed quickly.
“Thanks.” Matt mumbled, clutching the pillow to his chest and slipping into the room. He stood in front of the bed awkwardly, so much more subdued then he had been all day.
“It’s no problem.” Lance assured him. “I’m uh, kind of glad really.” He admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “Do you want the door closed or open?”
“Closed.” Matt answered. “I like finally having privacy.” He justified, mumbling. Lance hesitated a moment before letting the door slip shut. He opened it again and then reclosed it, just reminding himself he was able to do that.
“I’m just going to get changed. Make yourself at home, you know. You can sleep on the bed, no need to hurt your back on the floor.” He said, darting into the bathroom to change. Lance left the bathroom in just his pyjama pants, pelt clinging to his chest and shoulders. Matt was lying a little awkwardly on the bed and Lance moved to grab the pillow, planning on taking the floor. The human caught his wrist and Lance flinched before remembering that the injury had already fully healed.
“Sorry, I don’t want to take your bed, we could share.” Matt mumbled, letting go. Lance hesitated before nodding. Matt gave him room and Lance climbed over him to take the spot closest to the wall. Almost as soon as he was settled in Matt turned to face him, hands tangling in his pelt and head down, eyes focused on his hands. Lance was surprised but didn’t push him away. They were both silent for a long moment before Matt sighed and leaned into him so that his head was resting on Lance’s chest as well.
“I’m sorry. I just…” Matt sighed, not sure how to end the sentence but Lance was sure he understood. He wrapped an arm around Matt.
“I know.” He mumbled.
“When I couldn’t wake you up right away I was so scared because you told me I was all you had left and then I just… cast you aside like that.” Matt continued, hands clutching a little harder but not enough to really hurt Lance.
“You had every right too. It looked like I betrayed them. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it, I didn’t want to hurt you like that.” Lance sighed softly but Matt shook his head.
“Don’t be sorry.” He mumbled, continuing again before Lance could butt in. “And when you passed out in the lion I was just… scared that we wouldn’t get you into the cyropod in time and I’d never be able to thank you for getting us out of there.”
“I didn’t though. I just sent a message.” Lance mumbled.
“Without you sending that message Katie wouldn’t be able to find us.” Matt mumbled. “And if you haven’t lied to him I would’ve died. I don’t… I know I couldn’t’ve done the same thing for you Lance, I’d be too terrified.” He sighed. “So thank you for saving my life.” Lance wasn’t sure how to reply, just sighed and leaned into Matt.
“I’m glad you wanted to sure rooms.” He mumbled. “It’s stupid but I get really worried when I can’t see you.”
“It’s not stupid.” Matt said softly. “I’m the same.” They were silent again and Lance started to think Matt feel asleep against him, settling in a bit more to do the same. When he shifted lightly Matt spoke up again. “Did you mean it when you said you wanted to kiss me?” He spoke so softly it took Lance a moment to properly understand the words. When he did the Blue Paladin blushed darkly. For a second he contemplated lying but decided against it within the same second.
“Y-yeah.” He admitted, mumbling and looking over at a different wall in the room. He felt Matt shift on his chest, equally red face turning to look up at him.
“Can you now? I, uh, I mean now that you have your pelt back, and um…” Matt trailed off, seeming to fight with himself about looking away from Lance’s face, ultimately his eyes remained on the Blue Paladin’s face.
“If, you know, if you want me too.” Lance’s face was as red as Keith’s lion as he spoke.
“I do.” Matt breathed, proud that he managed to keep himself from stuttering the words. Lance took a deep breath than turned to look back at Matt. The kiss was soft and chaste, both nervous in the way their lips meet, but it was nice and Lance was grinning like an idiot when they pulled away. Matt was too. “Your lips are cold.” He commented. “Is that a Selkie thing?” Lance’s smiled faltered at the question and Matt frowned slightly.
“It’s not.” Lance mumbled. He’d noticed it since waking up. He was colder than normal and his lips were practically blue all the time, he’d thought maybe it was because a side effect of the cyropods but Coran had informed him the alien healing pods had reported no side effects of the sort in any species ever.
“Oh.” Matt mumbled. “Sorry.”
“It’s alright.” Lance said, forcing a small smile. “Coran says I should let Allura give me a check up to see what she did but I, uh, I guess I just... don’t want anyone pocking around again, you know?” Matt nodded against his chest.
“We can try to figure it out together.” He offered. “And I don’t mind that your lips are cold, it’s not bad.” He added with a smile that Lance thought might also be at least a little forced but the Blue Paladin didn’t mention it. He just nodded. “Uh, good night kiss?” Matt suggested, making Lance blush again and chuckle a little. He complied though and the two settled into a dreamless sleep, tangled together.
In the morning, when Hunk came to wake Lance up, he decided to instead let the two sleep on.
--
A week passed by before Lance could really tell it was going. In that time there was a tenseness within the castle that no one seemed to be able to break. Lance was getting better at acting like his old self, though he didn’t feel like his old self. He had yet to take his pelt off, and he flinched whenever someone else closed a door, but he started to eat properly and talk to his teammates again.
He hadn’t started training them again yet, however. He knew the others were training but he couldn’t find the courage to ask if he could join them. He was talking to the team again, and he was even starting to accept that they believed him, but he couldn’t convince himself they trusted him or didn’t want a better Blue Paladin.
Blue’s response to such fears was usually to assure him that there was no better Blue Paladin and while he trusted that Blue believed that he had trouble believing the team did.
Matt seemed to be having as much trouble as he was. He’d confided to Lance that he didn’t like the silence of the castle, that before being in the cell with Lance he was used to the sound of the workcamps, of the excessive amount of prisoners in them. And the cell that he was in whenever he wasn’t with Lance was near the other prisoners cells, close enough that he could constantly hear chattering. The castle, with its eight residents, wasn’t near as loud as his last year and a bit had been.
It didn’t help that he suddenly found himself free but with nothing to do. Sometimes he’d help Pidge or Hunk but they didn’t really need to the help and Matt often found he didn’t have the enthusiasm he needed to brainstorm and create. Other times he’d talk to Coran, about different species and their cultures which sometimes went amazing, and other times brought the two to the topic of the Galra having conquered those planets or to what Coran had lost.
It just all felt like the cogs of the castle were trying to run together but they weren’t quite in synch.
Shiro had them all sat down for another Truth Circle in hopes he might be able to help that.
“I know this went horribly last time,” Lance flinched slightly and the leader was quick to continue. “Because we let Lance down but not trusting him as we should have. But I thought it might be good to clear the air, properly this time. It doesn’t have to be a secret but just something you want to get off your chest.” It was quiet, no one was sure how to start. Lance stared at his knees, he didn’t particularly want to be here at all.
“I feel horrible for being so closed minded.” Pidge spoke up. “I mean, Lance was right, we’re practically surrounded by magic and I choose to decide Lance wasn’t taking this seriously because the other option was that he was a mythical creature? It was stupid to dismiss it so much, especially considering how obvious it is that he wasn’t lying.” Lance was practically speechless.
“I feel the same.” Keith sighed. “Lance isn’t that great an actor and he practically collapsed in that fight when he said his pelt was stolen. Besides, no human can like the ocean as much as he does.” They were kidding right? They weren’t actually apologizing for everything, they couldn’t be.
“Yeah, and like, I’ve know you practically my whole life Lance. I should be able to tell when you’re joking, right? And I should’ve known there’s no way you would joke about something like this, cause you wouldn’t and I know that but I still didn’t trust you and that was stupid.” Hunk added, gesturing as he spoke.
“I’m meant to be leading this team. I should have been able to tell how negatively all of it was affecting you and I should have trusted and listened to you Lance, you’re important to Voltron and important to us. I should’ve trusted you without a second thought.” Lance felt like he was going to explode or start crying, maybe both.
“I feel the same. My people are meant to be open to all species; I shouldn’t’ve dismissed your species simply because another said it wasn’t real. Not after I’ve read all the history books on such cases.” It was once more quiet.
“Well we have none of that to be sorry about, right Coran?” Matt said. “I believed you from the start, aren’t I the best?” Matt’s tone was lighter than everyone else, teasing and breaking some of the heavy mood. Lance let out a soft laugh, grateful for Matt’s input. He wasn’t sure how to handle all the apologies. He didn’t want to say it was okay because it wasn’t. He’d told them his biggest secret and his team hadn’t trusted him. But he wasn’t going to not accept their apologies. So he’d rather not have to say anything about them.
“Yeah, you’re the best Matt.” Lance said, bumping their shoulders together and trying to quickly and discreetly wipe his eyes. He took a deep breath. “Is there any chance this planet we’re on has a lake?” He asked, looking over to Coran who grinned, instantly registering the meaning behind the question.
“Why indeed it does! The information we have even suggests the lake is wonderfully charged with quintessence.” The word made both Lance and Matt flinch but no one commented on it.
“Cool. I, uh, I want to show you guys.” Lance said, standing up. He was nervous about this, but he wanted to do it, both to prove it to his team and to finally be able to feel his first form again.
“You don’t have to prove it Lance, we believe you.” Shiro assured, standing. Lance took another deep breath and grinned.
“I know you say that but I’m not going to be able to convince myself it’s true unless you see it. Besides, I want to show you guys.” The group seemed hesitate before nodding. Lance didn’t realize he was shaking until Matt took his hand.
“Alright, follow me Paladins!” Coran announced, leading them to the lake.
It was a short but tense trip and when they arrived Lance looked to the group. “Could you guys, uh, give me a minute? Kinda can’t do this with clothes on.” He mumbled.
“Why not?” Keith frowned and Lance snorted.
“I have heard enough horror stories about clothing being trapped in the middle of a tail, I don’t want to risk finding out if it’s true or not.” The group quickly turned and Lance undressed, never letting his pelt leave his sight or even his form fully. “Done.” He called and they all looked back. Lance’s pelt engulfed him and you couldn’t tell how it clung. Lance took a deep breath and flipped the hood up before back-flipping into the lake.
He was pretty sure he heard Pidge mutter ‘show off’ as he did.
The water claimed him and it felt wrong, not quite like home but not different enough to be anything but water. He tried not to focus on it, instead his attention was on his body. With a few seconds of concentration he felt it shift. It wasn’t painful, or uncomfortable, in fact just the opposite.
When his head poked out of the water he was a seal again. For the first time in way, way too long he was a seal. Lance was grinning as much as he could in the form.
“Oh my god he’s adorable.” Pidge’s comment made him grin more.
“That was a spectacular show! You were right, it’s nothing at all like altean shapeshifting. Much more like the Gaogn from Goa.” Coran began to ramble but no one’s attention was on him.
“Lance you are so cute!” Matt all but squealed and if seals could blush Lance would. He swam closer to them and Matt instantly pet the top of his head, Lance moving into the touch contently.
“Lance. Lance this is so cool. You are so cool and cute.” Hunk praised, giving Lance another pat.
“I must admit you are rather aesthetically appealing in this form, much in the same way as the mice.” Allura smiled, joining in on the ‘pat Lance’ train. This wasn’t so bad. His body was still cut and scared, and he was no longer perfect but this was his pure form the form that he hadn’t been hurt in.
“That’s… really cool.” Keith mumbled. Shiro looked so proud, moving closer to scratch under Lance’s chin. Lance purred softly, voice joining Blue’s Purr in the back of his mind, and Matt practically squealed again, causing Lance to laugh as well as he could in his form.
He pulled away from them a bit and watched their faces as his skin grew loose and he shifted back into his human form.
“There’s one other thing I should tell you guys.” Lance grinned. In this moment, with his pelt on his form and surrounded by water, Lance felt more at ease then he had in a long time.
“Is this the age thing?” Matt cut in, causing Lance to roll his eyes.
“No it’s not the age thing Matt.” He huffed good naturedly, sending a splash of water to the other. Lance wasn’t sure what they were, they shared a bed every night, they had started making out in private, they held hands on occasion and cuddled pretty often, but they hadn’t put a label to their relationship yet and Lance wasn’t sure how to bring it up. It felt like it was obvious that they were dating, but he wasn’t sure and he didn’t want to be wrong about it. “It’s a completely different thing, I wasn’t going to mention the age thing.”
“The age thing?” Pidge asked, looking about as confused as everyone else.
“It’s nothing.” Lance quickly said as Matt opened his mouth. “What I was going to say is that Haggar won’t be able to see me. Not for the next seven years.” He revealed.
“Why not?” Shiro asked, the teams confusion hadn’t gone away yet.
“’Cause she stole my pelt and I got it back. She can’t see or feel me for the next seven years which would be really helpful with the whole saving the universe thing.” He shrugged, swimming around slightly in the water. He was more relaxed here than he had been for a while but as his friends continued the silence he started to fret. They aren’t going to believe it, he thought, biting his lip. They’re going to think I’m lying again.
“You’re right. That could come in quite handy.” Allura spoke, hand on her chin as she contemplated the new information. “Perhaps not for a while, but surely it gives us an advantage.” Lance couldn’t help but grin widely.
They believed him.
They trusted him.
Maybe not everything was fixed, but it felt like things were on going in the right direction.
Notes:
At some point i might add an epilogue maybe
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FullmetalDude1 on Chapter 1 Sat 31 Dec 2016 05:12PM UTC
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OnceABlueMoon on Chapter 2 Tue 26 Dec 2017 11:54AM UTC
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boredomsMuse on Chapter 2 Thu 15 Nov 2018 12:22AM UTC
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AngstApocalypse on Chapter 2 Thu 15 Nov 2018 02:23AM UTC
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FullmetalDude1 on Chapter 4 Sat 31 Dec 2016 05:18PM UTC
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YourGaygerBoi on Chapter 4 Fri 18 Aug 2017 12:30PM UTC
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nonnie (Guest) on Chapter 5 Thu 27 Oct 2016 03:33PM UTC
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M (Guest) on Chapter 5 Thu 27 Oct 2016 08:32PM UTC
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Ceraphi (Guest) on Chapter 5 Thu 27 Oct 2016 11:19PM UTC
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