Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The night air is chilly and Dean shudders where he stands outside the club waiting for Benny. Dean doesn’t know what the fuck he is so late for, but he’s getting pissed off just standing here like a chump waiting for his friend while everyone else giggle their way past him.

It’s Friday night, another weekend started after a long week and Dean is so fucking ready to just get a drink and have some fun. Backbreaking work at the volunteer firefighter station combined with a few extra shifts at the auto shop toiling on old clunkers that Dean had no business taking has really beat him down. Well, the money will be good in the end but that doesn’t stop him from being tired both body and soul right now.

He glances at his phone to see absolutely no new messages from Benny and then throws a wink in the direction of some fine ladies who walk past him on their way to the club. They smirk at him, sashaying their hips unnecessarily and he feels that twinge inside him. The one that tells him it’s time he finds himself someone to spend the night with. Dean isn’t one for relationships and all that shit, not like his little brother Sam who has been with the same girl for about a lifetime now, but he would be lying if he said he isn’t interested in sharing a bed once in a while.

In fact, those women looked too fine to pass up on and Dean is just about to turn and walk after them when his phone goes off.

“Hey,” he more or less snaps when he answers, annoyance clear in his tone.

“Hey brother,” Benny says on the other end and fuck, Dean can already hear in his voice before Benny even continues that the night is ruined. “I’m sorry, my car broke down.”

“Take the bus.”

“Dude,” Benny has the galls to chuckle. “It like broke-broke. I gotta fix it before work on Monday.”

Dean rolls his eyes. Music and laughter come from the club up the street, and above him he can see the first snowflakes of the season blowing past the streetlamps. It’s so fucking tempting to just hang up on Benny and go to the club on his own. Wouldn’t be the first time anyway. And he needs that damn drink or something, needs to take the edge off.

But no matter how much of an asshole Dean can be, he’s not that kind of douche.

“Want help?”

Benny sucks on his teeth and Dean waits with bated breath, hoping for the answer he wants.

“Nah,” Benny eventually says and Dean feels his body sag with relief. He has spent the whole damn week fixing cars and he just now got the grease stains off his hands. He’s not keen on adding more just yet. “I think I can handle it.”

“Well don’t change your mind and call me later,” Dean retorts dryly. “I plan on getting drunk as fuck.”

Benny chuckles. “I figured. Have fun and have a beer for me too.”

“Yeah,” Dean mutters. “Next time, huh?”

“Of course, brother.”

Whatever. Dean pouts to himself after they have hung up, considering his options. He knows very well that he can have fun by himself and if things go the way he wants, he wouldn’t be alone too long anyway. But he only feels annoyed now, and indecisive. Maybe he should have gone to Benny’s to help him? That way he at least would have had some company.

“Fuck it,” he mutters, scuffing his boot against the ground. Yeah, fuck it. Guess he’ll just go home and have some beer on the couch, maybe watch some TV. He is behind on every show ever anyway, maybe he just ought to rest.

He looks lamentingly at the club, feeling irritated and pathetic.

“Excuse me?”

Dean turns, confused and surprised to find a man standing behind him. He looks about Dean’s age, maybe a few years older, sharp in a three piece suit and trench coat, thick black hair combed back, and a kind half-smile making his face look handsome and inviting.

“Uh, me?” Dean asks stupidly because even though there are people milling about the club, he and the man are standing pretty much to themselves. But fucking hell, why would someone who looks like that want to talk to a blue-collar guy like Dean? Maybe he thinks Dean is working as a valet or something.

“Yes,” the man says, his smiling widening. “I’m sorry for eavesdropping but would it be right of me to assume that your plans for the evening were cut short?”

Dean might need a fucking crowbar to unstick his eyebrows from his hairline but damn, now he’s even more confused.

“I, uh—yeah I guess?”

The man tilts his head to the side, regarding Dean. He is actually just about Dean’s height but suddenly he feels taller. Maybe it’s his whole aura making Dean feel small, Dean doesn’t know but he sure as fuck doesn’t like it.

“Then, are you free for tonight?”

“Oh okay,” Dean holds up a hand, stopping the man. Okay, now he knows what this is about. “Yeah, no thanks I’m not interested.”

The man blinks but doesn’t look perturbed. “Wouldn’t you like to hear my proposal first?”

Dean snorts, putting his hands in his jacket pockets, huddling against the cold. “Please, I ain’t dumb enough to be getting mixed up with the mob or whatever. Thank you, but I don’t need a job.”

“Mob?” the man asks and then laughs a surprisingly intoxicating laughter. It’s kind of contagious but Dean tries his best to not even smile. “Gracious no,” the man shakes his head, grinning. “I was simply going to ask if you would like to engage in something of a more sexual nature,” he taps his own chest. “With me.”

Dean is so dumbfounded he doesn’t even know where to start with that. Truth be told, he has been straight his whole ass life but yes, he has been approached by guys before. But not like this.

“You think I’m a hooker or somethin’?” he almost snarls and the man tilts his head like that again. Like a fucking puppy.

“No,” he smiles indulgently. “I think you’re a handsome man who has an hour or so to spare, and I would very much like to suck your cock.”

Dean’s whole fucking body jerks and he looks wildly around them. This has to be Candid Camera or some shit like that. Things like this just don’t happen in real life.

“The fuck you on about?” he hisses, stepping close to the man. For what purpose he doesn’t know. Presumably to intimidate him for some reason, but most likely it’s because Dean doesn’t want to be discussing this so loudly and so publicly.

The man’s smile turns lecherous and his eyes darken as he leans in a little bit more. “I’m saying I’ll pay you sixty dollars if you’ll let me suck you off,” he stares right into Dean’s soul. “Or a hundred if you let me jerk off while I do it.”

Almost a full minute of stunned silence passes between them. Around them, the snow begins to fall harder, people walk by laughing and cheering about their party night, and the scent of the man’s cologne wraps around Dean’s senses.

“Do I look like I’m that desperate for money?” he eventually asks in a low tone; voice unsteady because what the fuck kind of offer is that?!

The man smirks. “No. But you look like you wouldn’t mind getting sucked good and well, and money is the cherry on top.”

Well damn. Not like Dean can argue that.

*****

They go to a hotel but fuck, Dean can’t remember which or what room the man leads him too. He’s still too stunned by the fact that he accepted the man’s request and now here he suddenly is, alone in a nice though admittedly generic hotel room.

The man turns to him as soon as he has flicked on some lights. Ambient light, maybe, but Dean isn’t in the right headspace to appreciate something like that. The man is certainly inviting, but Dean nonetheless feels hesitant.

“Do you want to take off your jacket?”

Dean clears his throat. “Um…”

He shrugs, as if righting his jacket on his shoulders. The man shakes his head, chuckling softly.

“I get it, but you don’t have to be nervous,” he takes off his trench coat and tosses it carelessly on the bed before retrieving one of the pillows and coming over to where Dean is standing in the small hall. “I won’t force you to do anything, and if you don’t want to take anything off, you don’t have to.” He smiles again, tilting his head like that. “I just thought you might get warm.”

Dean is already warm, for several reasons but yes, one of them is that he is inside with a winter jacket on.

“I, uh, okay.”

Fuck it, there’s a coat hanger literally within arm’s reach of where Dean is standing. He hangs his jacket there, barely moving from his spot. The man only smiles again before unceremoniously tossing the pillow to the floor between them.

“Tell me,” he says calmly. “Is your hesitance born from the fact that a stranger approached you for sex, or because I’m a man?”

“Both,” Dean answers staunchly. “I’m straight.”

The man nods. “Well, just to put your mind at ease: I promise I won’t try anything with you.” He reaches in and touches Dean lightly on his hip and to Dean’s surprise he doesn’t want to shove off the man’s hand. “I promise I will only touch your hips and thighs for purchase, and of course your cock and balls. For more pleasant reasons.”

Fuck, the way he says cock does something to Dean. He can feel his dick tingling and it’s that nice sensation before it starts taking a real interest in whatever is happening.

“That’s fine,” Dean mumbles. “Just, uh, I’m not gonna touch you or anything. No kissing either.”

The man’s eyes cut down to Dean’s lips for the slightest second. “Of course. Have you decided, then? Sixty or a hundred?”

Dean purses his lips. “I don’t mind you jerkin’ off if I don’t have to touch you. Hundred is good.”

Good money if nothing else. Might mean he’ll at least be able to treat himself to some good meat next time he goes grocery shopping.

The man positively beams and okay, that’s a good look on him.

“Great,” he says and reaches into his suit jacket to a pocket from where he pulls a wallet.

Dean can see that he has way more than a hundred dollars tucked in there and the fleeting thought of asking for more is just that: fleeting. A hundred dollars is already a decent amount of money, good enough since it doesn’t seem like Dean has to do anything other than let this man suck his dick. Well, he does consider the fact that he might not get hard because let’s be real. The man is objectively handsome, Dean is smart enough to see that, but he is straight so maybe his dick won’t work.

On the other hand he hasn’t had any good sex in a while and his dick is already sort of invested so what the hell, right? Dean has never been a leap of faith kind of guy but maybe he ought to be this once.

“Thanks,” he mumbles when the money has exchanged hands and he has pocketed the bills. He feels kind of seedy but in a sexy way, strangely. Maybe because he knows he isn’t a hooker and he knows the man understands that too.

“My name is Castiel,” the man says then, tone friendly. “But you can call me Cas.” He leers. “It’s not a prerequisite, but I like when my partners say my name.”

Dean swallows. “Gotcha. I’m Dean.”

“Great,” the man—Cas—says and promptly slinks down to his knees.

Just—fuck—just kneels in front of Dean as if someone looking like that, in an expensive suit and everything, has any business kneeling for anyone, let alone a dumbass like Dean.

He feels a rush at the sight, a sense of power and superiority washing over him and okay, fuck yeah okay, Dean can see himself enjoying this after all. His dick sure as fuck likes what he sees and when Cas dives right in and starts opening Dean’s belt and jeans as if he simply can’t wait any longer, arousal curls lazily around Dean’s balls.

“Eager, are we?” he says gruffly and watches with dark eyes how Cas’ body seems to react to either his voice or his words.

“You know,” Cas murmurs, looking up to meet Dean’s eyes. “You’re free to touch me as much as you want. I don’t mind things like face fucking.”

Dean grins to hide his surprise, feeling more arousal go through him, like a heavy fog blanketing his body. Pleasant and cloying at the same time.

“I bet you don’t.”

“Just don’t hurt me,” Cas says and looks down again, at what his hands are doing. Opening Dean’s jeans just enough that he’ll be able to reach in and grab Dean’s dick and balls.

“Of course not,” Dean snorts. He isn’t that kind of guy and anyway, if he was, the time for that has passed. 

If he didn’t jump the man on the way to the hotel, or when they got alone in the room, or even when he saw Cas’ fat wallet, then he sure as fuck isn’t going to do it now that they’re here. And Cas is about to suck him off.

He’s already half-hard when Cas frees him from his underwear and he can’t help but smirk at Cas’ hungry stare. He knows he isn’t too big but he thinks he’s a decent size and he has usually gotten positive reactions from the women he has slept with. And apparently that applies to men like Cas too, go figure.

“You’re already hard,” Cas moans then and more or less plants his face against the base of Dean’s dick, mouth open as he breathes Dean in.

Suddenly Dean is aware of two things. Any mouth is a good mouth as far as his dick is concerned, and he hasn’t showered since this morning. Fuck, he has to stink.

“Maybe I should just go wash up,” he murmurs when Cas audibly sniffs him.

“No,” Cas groans. “You’re perfect.”

And before Dean can even gather his goddamn wits, Cas has licked his semi into his mouth. It’s wet and hot and Dean’s hips feel like melting. Fuck yeah, he loves getting blown. Looking down, he can see Cas with his nose buried in the coarse hair at the base of Dean’s dick, an expression of pure bliss on his handsome face.

“Hungry for it, hm darlin’?” he drawls without thinking, brushing a thumb over Cas’ cheekbone.

It makes Cas groan deeply and Dean hisses at the pleasure that blooms in his gut, traveling like sparkles up his spine and making his scalp tingle. Fuck. Guess Cas is the kind of cockslut that likes any dick as long as they work, size and scent be damned. Or maybe Dean’s dick is just that good? 

Yeah, he thinks as he watches Cas pull out, only to plunge back in, choking himself on Dean’s hard dick. Yeah, it’s definitely his dick that’s good enough to render this man delirious with want. Goddamn, it’s such a rush. Cas sounded so eloquent earlier, conducting himself like an important man, like a well-educated gentleman. And now here he is, clearly enjoying sucking the life out of Dean’s dick.

He has his hands on Dean’s hips, leaning slightly on him, fingers framing Dean’s crotch as his thumbs brush against Dean’s throbbing balls. The inside of his mouth is soft and inviting, and the way he curls his tongue around Dean’s dick, prodding the slit at the swollen head, feels fucking divine. There’s a desperation in Cas’ movements that doesn’t yet translate to the way he swallows Dean’s whole length but Dean can feel it there, simmering under the surface and it feels so fucking good. Knowing that he, that his dick, makes this man feel good makes pleasure pump through Dean.

It has always been like that for him, when he has sex, that he gets pleasure from seeing his partner get off on him, but there’s just something about this situation, the covert seediness of it, that makes it better. It’s sloppy and urgent and Cas seems caught between wanting to savor the moment and his yearning for Dean to come down his throat.

In his eagerness, Cas does a little abortive motion with his head that pushes Dean that last bit down, so that the head lodges at the back of Cas’ throat. It makes Cas moan wantonly and Dean’s whole damn body sags against the wall.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he grunts, putting a hand on the back of Cas’ head. “I know you want it bad but don’t actually fucking choke yourself.”

His hips tremble and he gets an insane urge to thrust against Cas when the other man looks up, meeting Dean’s eyes while his face is stuffed with Dean’s dick. Cas’ throat makes a clicking sound and Dean feels a swoop in his stomach when Cas tries and mostly fails to swallow with Dean so deep down.

Fuck his dick is hard now. Way harder than he ever thought he would be with a dude but fuck it, there’s just something about the wanton way Cas gives himself over to pleasure that does something to Dean. It makes arousal flare hotly inside him and he feels a kind of earnest longing, a need to fill up this man.

A primal want to own.

“Fuck,” he grits his teeth, unable to stop his hips from thrusting shallowly.

Cas moans deeply, and it sounds garbled as he continues to bob his head on Dean’s dick. Up and down, faster, sucking harder and shit, fucking shit, he is pawing at his own crotch now. He wants to jerk off, Dean realizes with a kind of explosion of pleasure. Sucking Dean off made this man want to pleasure himself.

He doesn’t look, mainly because he doesn’t want to, but also because he can’t really focus now anyway. Besides, he doesn’t need to look. He can sense it in the way Cas’ body moves all of a sudden. A jerky kind of motion that indicates that he is stripping his dick fast and hard. 

Arousal burns inside Dean, emanating from his crotch, his balls tight now and his dick so fucking hard it’ll be a goddamn surprise if Cas doesn’t come away with bruises inside his mouth. And fuck, his mouth. So hot and wet, so sloppy now, slurping noises mixing with Dean’s labored breathing and the sound of his blood rushing in his ears. 

It’s like a snap inside him, like a rubber band reaching its limits and then suddenly there he is, at the precipice, at the edge waiting and willing to tumble over. He feels it gathering, feels his whole body going taut, his dick expanding as if it has any business getting any harder.

“I’m coming inside, darlin’,” he grunts, one hand on Cas’ cheek halting his movements. 

He digs in his thumb against the side of Cas’ mouth, prying it open just the slightest. Cas looks at him with unseeing eyes, drool running down his chin as he shifts his tongue around, prodding and licking Dean’s dick. He looks completely out of it and the only thing moving on him is his hand, continuously stroking his dick. If Dean had looked, he would have found it red and leaking, but he doesn’t, instead too focused on his own pleasure.

A choked off groan escapes him as he starts thrusting shallowly again, rubbing the head of his dick against the roof of Cas’ mouth, one thumb pressing down on Cas’ tongue to open his mouth wider.

“You be good and take it for me,” he presses out, pleasure making his body burn, sweat beading. 

Cas makes a little hiccupping, needy sound and then Dean feels the other man’s body jerk. It’s a jerk all men know. That telltale signal that the body is caving in, the pleasure having successfully taken over. And shit, it’s all because of Dean.

It’s all he needs, that final push that lets him sail off the cliff as well. He tries to say something more, wants to be suave in this moment where Cas has shown him such grace, but fuck if he can. All he accomplishes is a sharp intake of air and a little grunt and then he’s fucking flooding Cas’ mouth. Deep down his throat, all the way inside, giving the man as much as Dean can give and then a little extra because it was that fucking good.

Cas moans, sounding so fucking happy it sends another jolt of desire through Dean, and he slumps back against the wall while Cas tenderly but eagerly licks him clean. 

“Damn, dude,” he murmurs after a moment. 

He is startled when Cas opens his eyes and they are coherent all of a sudden. He pulls off Dean’s softening dick, smirking to himself, and when he rises to his feet it feels as if he towers over Dean who is still leaning against the wall.

“That was just as good as I thought it would be,” he says cheerily, his already rumbly voice only a little wrecked. By Dean’s dick. Being lodged down there.

Fuck.

“Yeah, you seemed to, uh,” Dean waves to Cas’ crotch where his dick is still hanging out of his suit pants. “Really enjoy it or whatever.”

“I did,” Cas states enthusiastically, as if they’re talking about literally anything else. “And don’t worry, I seem to have managed to miss your boot,” he points down and Dean only now looks at the floor between them. And there, in front of the pillow Cas had used to cushion his knees, are the clear stains of evidence of Cas’ enthusiasm. “I got a little carried away,” he chuckles and steps to the side, going to the bathroom.

“Uh-huh,” Dean harrumphs, wondering how he should feel about that as he listens to Cas turning on the faucet. Disgusted, he supposes, but they’re just globs of come, just like his own.

“I was supposed to catch it in my hand, I usually do that,” Cas states, still sounding like they’re talking about something completely normal. Or maybe this is normal and Dean should just calm the fuck down. “But I kind of lost myself,” his eyes linger on Dean’s dick and fuck it, there’s a goddamn tingle in his spine again. “Anyway, thank you.”

With that, he kneels down and wipes off his come stains with some paper he took from the bathroom. Dean stands there like a chump, dick out and legs spread, while Cas is basically in the same position he was in a few minutes ago, when everything felt glorious. 

An insane urge to grab Cas and shove his dick back inside the man’s welcoming, greedy mouth comes over him but he of course remains still until Cas is finished. Only then does he go into the bathroom and clean himself up.

When he comes back again, Cas is standing by the bed and his trench coat, rifling through his wallet.

“I have to be honest with you,” he says without even looking up. “Without exaggerating, you were the best I’ve had in a long time.”

Dean swallows. The way Cas can shift from this well-spoken, calm guy to the absolute cockslut from before, and then back again is both unnerving and intriguing and he doesn’t know what to do with that.

“Thanks, I guess?” he throws Cas a grin for good measure when he looks at Dean. “You were pretty decent yourself.”

Was fucking fantastic but Dean isn’t ready to admit all that. 

Cas’ beaming smile throws Dean for another loop. “You know what they say. When you love something…” he makes a little Tada-gesture with his hand and Dean has to suppress a smile.

“So what? It’s like a kink or something? To suck off strangers?”

“I’d say it’s exactly a kink,” Cas states confidently, without a shred of embarrassment. Dean envies him at that moment. “Of course, it doesn’t have to be a stranger. I just like sucking cock.”

Dean clicks his tongue, contemplating Cas while he looks through his wallet again, clearly searching for something.

“Why not get a boyfriend or whatever then?” he shrugs when Cas tilts his head, looking confused. “I mean, then you’d have free access to a dick, right?”

“Oh yes, that would be nice,” Cas nods, smiling. “But I’m a very busy man. Work takes up too much of my time so it’s much easier to engage in quick little things like this.”

Dean nods. “I get it, I guess.” Well he doesn’t guess, he knows exactly what Cas is talking about, but he feels weird about relating too much to this man. They’re just too different, and not just because of the dick-loving aspect, and it’s making Dean tense. Or maybe it’s the fact that he liked seeing this man ruffled that’s making him anxious as fuck, who knows? “And hey, if it works for you then I say go for it.”

“I’m happy to hear that,” Cas grins. “Because I wouldn’t mind having another go at your cock specifically.”

“Uh…”

“I mean,” Cas chuckles, waving his hand. “Nothing serious. Just if you feel like getting a good sucking again some time you can call me and maybe we can arrange something? Oh but I seem to have run out of business cards,” he huffs, throwing his absolutely loaded wallet on the bed and turning his back to it as he goes over to the desk opposite the bed.

Dean stares long and hard at that wallet. It would be so easy to just nab it and make a run for it. Cas seems like he’s in good shape but Dean is a pretty recent runner and he is pretty confident he could out-run Cas. Because damn, there is a lot of money in that wallet. Either Cas is actually rich as fuck and he doesn’t care even if Dean takes it or he is a careless dumbass. Well, he did invite a random stranger to a secluded hotel room, maybe it’s a little bit of both.

Dean closes his eyes for the barest second, collecting himself. He isn’t the kind of guy who would steal something from anyone so the temptation isn’t really there. But still, he thinks when he looks up to see Cas studying him through the mirror above the desk, it’s a part of Cas’ character and motives worth thinking about.

“Here,” Cas says then, smiling when their eyes meet. He turns, holding out a paper to Dean. “Have my number.”

It’s indeed a number, with Cas’ name written above it. Dean takes the note and looks at it for a moment, trying to figure out if the number seems legit or not.

“I probably won’t call,” he says but pockets the note anyway. He brushes the hundred dollar bill when he does and feels a rush inside him. 

“I’ll be happy if you do,” Cas says, still smiling slightly.

Dean nods. “Probably won’t, though.” Cas nods as if he is agreeing but somehow Dean feels as if he’s not. “Okay, I’ll be going then.”

“Do you know your way back from here?”

“Dude,” Dean snorts. “It was only a couple of blocks.”

Truth be told, no Dean doesn’t know his way back since he had walked here in a goddamn trance but he isn’t about to fucking admit that. Instead he simply slips out of the room, follows the exit signs and turns on Google Maps as soon as he is outside. 

Turns out he wasn’t wrong and it is only a few blocks from where the club is, not that it matters much since Dean isn’t going back there. He considers it, thoughts straying to his newfound money, and then he considers going to his favorite bar instead and getting something to drink straight from the tap. But he feels illogically lonely and the weather has picked up too, the wind blowing harder and carrying more snow than Dean cares to acknowledge.

With a huff, he starts walking to where he parked his car but is stopped in his tracks when his phone dings with an incoming message. Irrationally, his mind first goes to Cas, as if he had gotten Dean’s number in return and would be texting him immediately. Well, he did seem thirsty for cock so maybe that wouldn’t have been too far-fetched if Dean had actually left his number. But he didn’t so he doesn’t know what he is feeling disappointed for when he sees it is only Benny. Did he want to bust his balls this soon again, even though they feel like wrung-out peaches, or is he disappointed that Cas didn’t text about getting a beer or something instead? What a dumb fucking idea.

No, instead it’s Benny who happily declares his car fixed. Good job Ben, it only took about two hours and a blowjob. Dean stops to text his friend back, something congratulatory because he is happy for Benny. He knows all too well how it is when cars break down and you’re fucking stranded, and not only because it’s part of his job to fix messes like that.

Suddenly, looking at Benny’s happy texts, Dean doesn’t feel like being alone anymore and he knows a quick question will fix that but also knows he won’t ask. No matter the fact that Benny stood him up tonight, his friend is always there for him when he really needs him but Dean can’t bring himself to ask tonight. Maybe it’s his shame over not immediately jumping on helping Benny, or maybe it’s a sense of that seediness from earlier that’s seeping back and making him feel less sexy now that he is alone, but something stops him from asking Benny if he can come over to celebrate.

It’s fine, he thinks as he pockets his phone and makes his way back to his apartment instead. He should really go home, have a shower and maybe think about his life choices, be a grown-up and all that jazz. And maybe in the morning he won’t feel as bad about using the money, or as nervous about looking at Cas’ phone number.

Chapter Text

Dean doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about what happened with Cas but it’s there, at the back of his mind, like an incessant gnat gnawing on him. It’s just that it’d felt too good, like it had no business being that good.

And there was Cas, with his goddamn deadpan expression. I’d say it’s exactly a kink. 

Yeah okay, but what a kink indeed. Truth be told, Dean does kind of understand him. Understands that itch and the need and how it feels both time-consuming and hollow to find someone new every time. But then, Cas’d said he and Dean wouldn’t be exclusive, right? He specifically said they wouldn't be serious even if Dean called him for another booty call. So he would be going out and finding someone new every time. Only Dean supposes it’s much easier to offer someone money to suck them off real quick than to actually flirt with someone.

But it must be dangerous, right? What if he came across the wrong dude and got beaten up for even suggesting something like that. Some people are real homophobic assholes like that, Dean thinks sourly. Although he supposes the proposal could feel indecent enough without someone being homophobic. Shouldn’t warrant a beating but what the fuck does Dean know.

Honestly, he’s still confused why he even said yes. Even if he doesn’t think he’s the kind of asshole that would go around beating people up, that doesn’t mean he had to agree to getting his dick sucked off by a clear man. And it had no right feeling that good. Kind of maybe the best he has ever had, perhaps? He doesn’t know, isn’t quite ready to admit stuff, even if he can feel the note with Cas’ number calling out to him.

“So I got one for you,” he says to his friends when they are all hanging out at their favorite bar, occupying a booth and drinking beer and cheap whisky while watching compilations of Peter and the guys from Family Guy giving each other would-you-rather scenarios.

“Shoot,” Benny says, cutting off the video on his phone and pocketing it. He is smiling widely, clearly a little drunk and happy. Another long week of work done, another chance to escape the dreariness for a while.

Around them the bar is packed with likeminded people and their presence is both comforting and annoying. But in the context of what Dean is about to say, maybe he is happy to be in public. To be just another dude in a sea of dumbasses.

“Would you rather…” he has to pause to gather his thoughts even though he has been thinking about this for fucking ages. “Would you rather get sucked off by a man or Pamela Anderson in her prime, but,” he holds up his hand when Benny, Garth, and Lee all make faces as if that’s a no-brainer. “Pam has the worst case of herpes you’ve ever seen.”

Garth scrunches up his face, hunkering down over his beer. “Herpes?”

“How bad?” Benny asks and Dean kind of loves his friends for taking this silly thing so seriously. It’s definitely what makes the game fun just like in the Family Guy skits, but Dean of course has an ulterior motive for his question.

“Like full on pus scabs,” he says, gesturing to his mouth. “Blister City over here.”

Garth gags. “The guy, I’d take the guy.”

“For real now?” Lee barks out a sharp laugh that stomps out any kind of flaming excitement inside Dean’s goddamn chest. “A guy?”

“I’m not subjecting my willy to any of that,” Garth states, appalled, and Dean kind of loves his friend a little more for sticking to his guns. Garth was always cool like that, taking no shit from nobody.

“Alright, alright,” Benny waves his hand when it looks like Lee is going to protest. “What about the guy?”

“What about him?” Dean asks inconspicuously, taking a sip of his whisky. “He’s a normal guy. Objectively good-looking, I s’pose.”

“Nah, I mean is he clean?” Benny elaborates and Dean has to fight a blush about calling Cas—the hypothetical guy—good-looking.

“Squeaky clean,” he presses out. “Like, he has a doctor’s note if you want it.”

“I’d definitely take the guy,” Garth states with emphasis, throwing Lee an amused look.

Lee rolls his eyes. “I ain’t letting a dude suck me off.”

“You gotta do something to him?” Benny asks, clearly contemplating things.

Dean shakes his head. “He doesn’t want anything from you. Other than to choke on your dick.”

“And Pam?” Lee interjects, leering. “Can I do stuff to her?”

“You can do anything but she’s got herpes all over.”

Garth makes a gagging sound, shaking his head.

“Still the lady, then,” Lee states confidently.

“Are they good?”

Dean looks at Benny again, ignoring Garth and Lee’s staring match. “They’re both equally good.”

Because why wouldn’t they be? Why would any of them be better than the other? Aside from having more practice and fucking gusto, Dean supposes. And would they? Would Pamela Anderson in her prime look as blissed out to have Dean’s dick lodged in her throat as Cas had? Hard to say, since he won’t ever get a chance with Pamela from her Baywatch era but Dean can’t help that gnawing gnat gnawing harder. Cas had looked like he really fucking enjoyed it, after all.

“See?” Lee states, slapping the table with finality. “Why go for a dude when there’s a willing and good woman at hand? Makes no damn sense.”

“Because he’s clean,” Garth argues.

“I think the G-man is on to something,” Benny says solemnly and Dean doesn’t know why, but he feels relief to hear Benny say that.

He has been Dean’s best friend since forever and hearing him say some stupid shit about Dean’s recent life choices would have been hard. And let’s be honest, having two of his friends kind of on his side feels great. Feels like Dean doesn’t have to be ashamed. Although what he specifically feels ashamed about, he doesn’t fucking know. Some internalized homophobia or some shit, he supposes, but it’s not like he is going to dwell on that.

“So you two would rather get sucked off by a man because the woman who is offering has a little herpes?” Lee snorts. “Alright.”

“Men can be good too,” Garth argues in his harshest tone, which isn’t specifically harsh at all, but still. 

Benny raises his beer bottle to Garth. “And I’d rather keep clean.”

Dean feels a kind of warmth inside him when Garth clinks his glass against Benny’s bottle.

“I guess,” Lee mutters, rolling his eyes again.

“What if he paid you?” Dean asks Lee, feeling the bill he has yet to spend burn a hole in his wallet.

Lee raises an eyebrow. “Upping the stakes? Okay. So he’s willing to pay to suck my dick off and she isn’t? They’re both equally good, but he’s a man and she’s contagious?” he shrugs when Dean nods. “Still the woman, I ain’t no sissy.”

“Why would it make you a sissy to get your dick sucked off by anyone?” Garth asks heatedly and Dean can feel this experiment has run its course and he anyhow doesn’t want his friends to get into an actual argument.

“I’d so get paid to get blown,” Benny laughs. “What a dream job.”

“Like a hooker?” Lee drawls, to which Garth bristles.

“Okay I got another one,” Dean grins to dispel the potentially bad mood. It hasn’t quite gotten that far but it’s simmering under the surface. “Would you rather eat the world’s saltiest chip or the world’s spiciest?”

“That’s a boring one,” Lee starts to say but before he can even finish, Benny jumps on the question, clearly sensing what Dean did, bless him.

“Garth would go for saltiest because he can’t handle spicy food for shit.”

“Hey!” Garth exclaims but the banter is friendly again now, grins being thrown around and Dean feels himself relaxing.

They talk at length about the chip challenge, even though Lee had proclaimed it a boring topic, and Dean almost manages to forget about Cas and his perfect blowjob and the money and that goddamn note with his fucking number.

But only almost because of course he calls when he has gone from tipsy to drunk and of course Cas answers and of course they arrange to meet up.

It’s another hotel, this one close to the bar, and Dean isn’t surprised because there are a lot of hotels in this town and whatever, it’s good privacy with a bathroom. A sense of comfort without being too intimate, too familiar.

“Sorry,” Dean mumbles when he stumbles a little as soon as they are inside the room, alone. “I’m a little drunk.”

He came here directly from the bar, managing to lose his friends as they were splitting up to go home for the evening. Well, Lee had already gone, having found a woman and clearly feeling inspired by their conversation from earlier, and Garth had been yawning for a while before they decided to call it quits. It was mainly Benny who Dean had to shake but when Dean proclaimed to be too beat to want a drunken burger, Benny had thankfully taken Dean seriously and immediately accepted that he would be eating alone. 

It was only after they had all parted that Dean really understood his own actions and words, understood why he’d felt the need to leave his friends, and he had dialed Cas’ number mostly on autopilot, like a damn robot. Or a moth to a flame.

“Too drunk to do this?” Cas asks and Dean considers being angry at how prim and proper Cas seems even though it’s so fucking late.

He straightens, rubbing his face. “Fuck. I don’t even know why I called.”

Cas throws him a lecherous grin, once again going over to the bed to put his coat there. “Presumably because you want to get sucked good and well.”

Dean snarls silently and shucks off his jacket to hang it on the same hook as last time. Or a similar one since they aren’t even in the same hotel. Whatever.

“Just get one of them pillows and come kneel for me,” he says gruffly, opening his belt.

A shudder seems to go through Cas and it catches Dean off guard so much that he stops moving for a moment.

“You’re more forceful today,” Cas murmurs, coming over with a pillow in hand. He deposits it in front of Dean, who once again ends up with his back to the wall, this time beside the bathroom door.

“Yeah? You don’t like it, you gotta say so.”

“I didn’t say I didn’t like it,” Cas says in his curiously rumbly voice, kneeling down and looking up at Dean with already hooded eyes.

“Fuck,” Dean swears low, under his breath. A surge of desire goes through him, surprising him. But it must be the anticipation of the blowjob, right? Because now he knows how much he enjoyed it last time so his body can’t wait. Makes sense.

“How do you want it this time?” Cas asks and only then does Dean realize time has stood still for a moment. Fucking hell, he feels transfixed. “Sixty or—”

“I don’t fucking care if you jerk off,” he snaps, unnecessarily harsh. “Just gimmie a hundred and get to sucking.” His dick is already hardening, given room by the way he has already opened his pants like a fucking chump.

Cas makes a little sound at the back of his throat, close enough to a moan that an arrow of want goes through Dean. Fuck yeah, to make a man like this moan for him, to make him cry from how good he feels, yearning for more, what a goddamn rush!

“Yeah, you like that, huh?” he murmurs when Cas pulls out a hundred dollar bill and sneaks it into Dean’s jeans pocket. “Bet you’re in control all the time in your life, must feel nice to just relax.”

He barely resists hissing when Cas pulls his dick out, the man’s fingers clever and warm as they cup his balls and pull on him to make him fully hard in no time.

“Bet you’re the same,” Cas says lowly, flicking up his eyes to meet Dean’s. “Only the other way around.”

Dean contemplates for about half a second if he should feel offended or angry about that statement but decides against it almost immediately. Partly because it’s basically true, and partly because his lizard brain is taking over and he wants that pleasure. The one Cas gave him last time and that he hasn’t reached again in the week that has passed.

With a grin, he takes his dick in hand and bops it against Cas’ lips. “Open up now, darlin’. Talking’s done.”

Cas does moan then, opening wide, and it sends a pleasurable shiver up Dean’s spine. Fuck yeah he wants it. Wants Dean’s dick deep inside him again. The rush from last time comes back, choking him with arousal, and Dean feels fucking alive like never before when he feeds Cas his dick.

The wetness and warmness that comes over him, that covers his dick as soon as he has it inside Cas, should feel like any he has felt. But it doesn’t, it’s better. This is hardly the first time Dean has been sucked off, definitely not his first casual fuck, but there is just something about how Cas does it. Maybe it’s the enthusiasm, or maybe it’s the way his fucking throat seems molded to fit Dean specifically.

“Huggin’ me so tight,” he grunts, hips bucking once, dick straining.

Cas looks up at him with those eyes again, the blissed-out, tear-stained eyes and fuck, is he actually beautiful right now?

Dean grits his teeth and puts his hands on Cas, much rougher than perhaps intended but fuck if he is conscious of that. No, he just grabs the back of Cas’ head with one hand, the other cradling his jaw to feel the movements there, pinky down to tap against Cas’ throat where he thinks he can feel himself.

And then he starts thrusting.

“Breathe through your nose, damn,” he mutters when Cas gags, but he does thrust shallower after that.

Cas for his part keeps up really fucking well. He had said he didn’t mind getting face-fucked so maybe that’s why. Or maybe he actually likes choking on dick as much as he proclaims. Like the proper cockslut he is.

Arousal rages inside Dean, guiding his movements and he loses himself in the movement of his hips, the slow and steady rocking. It hits him all too fucking fast, how close he gets to coming from this alone. But he can’t help it, the physical pleasure is addictive, not to mention the mental pleasure. Insane.

There’s just something about this visual, about this man kneeling for him, getting hard for him, all because he likes to blow Dean’s dick. Well, Dean isn’t fucking stupid. He understands that Cas would look like and behave like this with any other man too and that’s fine. The point is that right now he is here, with Dean, because he wants to be. Because he likes this.

“Fuck,” Dean grunts, pulling out and holding Cas back when he aims to follow. “Fuck, maybe I am too drunk.”

“You about to come?” Cas asks, voice all scratchy. Dean’s dick bobs, slick from saliva and precome. “Do it on my face.”

“Fucking hell, man,” Dean mumbles, grabbing his dick by the base and smearing the head against Cas’ lips.

He opens up a little, moaning and chasing Dean’s dick with his tongue. Little kitten licks that have no fucking business feeling good but that rile Dean up right now. The pleasure is coiling tightly inside him, making everything feel taut, and he eagerly chases that high. Then Cas’ tongue catches on the glands under the head and Dean fucking melts. He sighs, spreading his legs a little and leaning heavily on the wall, holding his dick still for Cas to lap at like a goddamn lollipop.

It looks ridiculous but it’s also so fucking hot. Cas is squirming, thighs pressing together as if he is testing himself. Pushing to see how far he can go before he simply can’t anymore and has to pull out his dick and jerk off. Yeah, that shit’s hot, Dean isn’t going to lie about that. He’s no stranger to edging and it’s unexpectedly hot seeing another man do it to themselves.

“C’mon now,” he says when his body catches up to his thoughts and a fresh wave of pleasure crashes over him. “In you go.”

Which it to say, in he goes, because Cas happily swallows Dean’s dick again, moaning around him and fuck yeah, Dean can hear the clinking of Cas’ belt now. Guess even he can’t stand it for too long, not when his mouth gets stuffed like this.

One hand on Dean’s hip to steady himself, Cas starts bobbing his head as he paws his pants open to pull out his own dick. Dean doesn’t look this time either but he can feel a definitive shift in Cas when he at last has a hand around himself. His whole body jerks and tenses in time with his strokes and fuck, there’s suddenly his thumb against Dean’s balls, brushing over them in a surprisingly tender move.

Dean shudders, feeling the effects of the alcohol he had before coming here take over and shit, usually that means he has a hard time coming but not this time. Fuck no, this time he feels like he’ll bust way before Cas and maybe that doesn’t have to matter? It feels like it should, feels like Dean should care, but fuck, is this even a competition?

“I’m fucking close,” he grits, only then realizing that he has one hand on Cas’ shoulder and the other against the wall for some fucking reason. “I’m—ah fuck—”

The pull is strong, relentless and Dean wants it so bad. It feels so fucking good, the way Cas takes all of him, chokes on him, licks his dick like it’s the best thing he has ever tasted. Dean can’t stop dripping precome but what the fuck does it matter when Cas just laps it off before it can even go anywhere?

“Shit, Cas, I’m—”

He gasps sharply when Cas abruptly pulls off and starts stroking him fast. “On my face,” he groans, looking expectantly up at Dean. “I want it.”

“Fuck yeah you do,” Dean groans, fisting Cas’ hair and holding him still, unable to stop himself or the force that pushes through him at that moment.

The pleasure crests painfully but for some reason Dean can’t make himself look away. Instead he holds Cas’ gaze and in the next moment the coil snaps and fuck, he’s coming all over Cas’ face. Thick pearly ropes of come shoot out and splatters on his chin, up over one eye that Cas barely has time to close. He has his mouth open, tongue out to catch most of it and Dean shudders and shakes, body jerking with his orgasm, breath leaving him in small stutters as he watches himself coat Cas like this.

It's too primal, more than Dean has ever done before and this isn’t even the first time he has done facial. But fuck, Cas just looks so pleased. As if the very pinnacle of living is kneeling right here and letting Dean come on his face.

In the corner of his eye he sees Cas’ arm moving, slowly and deliberately, but before he can say or do anything, Cas sighs out a content moan and there’s no mistaking that. Getting a facial from Dean made him come. Right there on the floor. Again.

Fuck. Dean needs to sit down.

“That was great,” Cas says later, calling out from the bathroom while he washes his face.

Dean is sitting on the bed, feeling dizzy from the orgasm, the alcohol, the fucking everything.

“Yeah,” he answers after too long. “Yeah, uh. It was good.”

Cas comes out, towel in hand, head tilted that way he does. As if he is trying to understand a great puzzle and maybe that is what Dean is to him. The straight man who is slowly getting addicted to getting sucked off by men. No, a man. By Cas.

Dean shakes his head, rubbing his hands over his face. It’s only been two times. Two times mean nothing. Nothing.

“You okay?”

“Just, uh, the beer’s catching up to me.”

As good an excuse as any. Cas seems to accept that explanation anyway.

“Want me to call you a cab?”

He should say yes, but Dean doesn’t want to accept kindness from Cas. Sam should be up anyway, since it’s a weekend.

“Nah, I got my, uh,” does he want to tell Cas about Sam? They aren’t getting to know each other, it’s not that kind of relationship. Right? “I got it.”

“Okay,” Cas says and smiles, unexpectedly walking over to Dean.

He bends down and Dean jerks, heart leaping when he at first thinks Cas will try to kiss him, but then he feels the man’s fingers around his limp dick, putting him back in his pants. And don’t fucking ask why Dean is okay with that but not kissing because Dean has no fucking answer right now.

“I’m happy you called,” Cas murmurs warmly.

“Okay,” Dean mutters, avoiding eye-contact.

“Would you be okay with me calling you too?”

Dean’s body surges. Desire, arousal, need. Confusion.

“Yeah,” he says weakly, not nearly as nonchalantly as he hopes. “I guess that’d be okay.”

*****

Cas doesn’t call but he does text, and it’s not even a week later. It makes Dean smirk in the middle of work and he answers without a second thought. Because what’s there to think about anyway? Cas likes sucking Dean off and Dean likes getting sucked off, he even gets money for his services of just standing there like the horny dumbass he is. Granted, he hasn’t used the money for anything yet but it’s good to have a little extra. The holidays are coming up, would be nice to be able to buy Sam something good, just saying.

Cas texts him an address and time and when Dean arrives it turns out to be the same hotel that they went to the first time. Come to think of it, even though they have been to two different hotels they have been very similar, maybe even the same chain. Well, it’s not like Dean cares, but he does think about it when he rides the elevator up to the right floor.

There, inside a room Cas has paid for like the two previous times, he gets the blowjob of his life for the third time and somehow this time, when he isn’t nervous like the first or drunk like the second, it’s even better.

Good enough that Dean thinks maybe he should stop thinking so much, huh? Cas obviously likes this, he shamelessly gets on his knees and opens up, and he looks like a fancy businessman. So if someone like that can enjoy this and still be proud of himself, then so can Dean.

That’s a good enough argument for Dean, and his goddamn dick rejoices the moment he decides to stop fighting so much. Because shit feels good, Dean. In fact, it’s so fantastic that it’s him that contacts Cas the two following times and he is pleased when Cas accepts his requests both times. And so, as the winter drags on, Christmas approaching, Dean finds himself getting steadily addicted to whatever it is that they are doing here. And curious about how far it can go.

“What if I said no?” he asks the sixth time they meet up.

Cas pauses, hand outstretched with the now customary hundred dollar bill. “Well then you’d be free to leave of course.” He tilts his head to the side, studying Dean. “Although I wouldn’t mind an explanation as to why you came here to begin with?”

Dean smiles. “No I mean, what if I said no to that?” he gestures to the money. “What if I said I only want sixty? And you can’t take your dick out or jerk off.”

Cas lowers his hand, straightening a little. “That has happened with other men,” he says calmly. “And with them I sucked them off until they came, got hard but didn’t do anything about it, and then I jerked off alone after they left,” he suddenly grins, the look so predatory that it sends a shiver of carnal lust through Dean. “But with you I imagine I’d come in my pants.”

“Shut up,” Dean laughs, waving his hand to dismiss Cas’ words. “That’s not real. Grown men don’t do that outside of pornos.”

Cas licks his lips, eyes cutting down to Dean’s crotch and back up again. “I don’t see it being too difficult, with the right incentive.”

Fucking hell, the absolute fire that sets in Dean’s body is insane. It’s like nothing he has ever felt before, like fucking wildfire spreading with no hope of ever being extinguished.

“Good to know,” he says gruffly, throwing Cas a smirk and snatching the hundred dollar bill from his lax grip. “Now get on your knees. My dick ain’t suckin’ itself.”

That’s the first time Dean sits in a chair in the room instead of standing in the hallway while Cas kneels for him and Dean can pretend all he wants that he chose that because it’s damn difficult to be standing while orgasming, but he knows it’s not only about that. And when Cas looks up at him, eyes dark and glossed over, his mouth stuffed with Dean’s thick dick, he thinks Cas knows that too.

*****

About a week before Christmas Dean gets the absolutely ridiculous idea that maybe he should get Cas something? It’s immediately dismissed, of course, since they have no relationship outside of these semi-regular cock-sucking sessions. Not even a burgeoning friendship or anything. Although sometimes it kind of feels like they could have? A friendship, at least.

Which is to say, only a friendship. Because Dean is fucking straight. Yeah.

“Fuck,” he mutters, almost tossing the tie in his hand back to the table where it was on display. He’d started thinking about Cas when he saw it, only because Cas usually wears a tie, so yeah, that’s the only reason Dean thought about something so stupid as buying Cas a gift.

Plus he supposes he’s getting wrapped up in the general frenzy. He’s out Christmas shopping with Sammy who apparently intends to have a proper Christmas celebration or what-the-fuck-ever. Dean doesn’t know what’s wrong with what they usually do but okay, dinner with Jess and her family does sound nice.

“We can have our traditional eggnog on Christmas Eve,” Sam had suggested and Dean doesn’t even know why he is pretending to be grumpy about this.

Maybe he’s becoming like dad. What a depressing fucking thought.

Although Dean supposes dad would never have let another man suck him off, for any amount of money, so there’s that.

“What are you looking at?” Sam asks, materializing beside Dean. “Ties? For someone?” since Dean doesn’t wear ties, obviously. “Oh, Garth might look good in this color.”

“I ain’t buying a tie for Garth,” Dean snarls but immediately regrets his tone. Sam didn’t mean any harm, and he for sure doesn’t fucking know what kind of storm is raging inside Dean. “No, I was just looking,” he sighs. “I’m bored.”

“I’m almost done,” Sam says in a tone that suggests that’s a lie.

Well, Dean lied too so he guesses they’re even. He’s not bored at all. In fact he loves hanging out with his little brother and doing most things. And it’s good for him to get out of his apartment for anything other than work or the bar. Or getting sucked off by Cas, he supposes.

He checks his phone as if on reflex, but no, there are no new messages from Cas. Dean thinks he’s being a bit stupid but after the last time he had decided not to be the one to contact Cas. He initiated it two times in a fucking row, he needs to check himself. Because if there’s one thing Dean Winchester isn’t, it’s needy.

“What do you have left?” he asks Sammy when they leave the store and Sam brings up his little Santa list. Cute.

“I still need something for Jess,” Sam sighs. “It’s so hard.”

Dean smirks about the obvious joke but doesn’t say anything about it. “You’re making it worse than it is. Just get her jewelry, chicks dig that shit.”

“It’s a wonder you’re single,” Sammy retorts dryly but he does start walking in the direction of the nearest jewelry store, much to Dean’s amusement. “Come to think of it, I haven’t seen you with a woman lately.”

Dean purses his lips. Haven’t had a woman since he met Cas. Why go to the trouble of finding someone else when Cas is so eager and available? And so fucking good. Makes no damn sense. Not that Dean will admit that.

“Haven’t really gone out much lately.”

“Benny said you were out two days ago.”

Tattle-tale… Dean wants to snap at Sam, ask what he and Benny are so chummy for, but he of course knows they are friends too. It’s kind of inevitable with how long Benny has been in Dean’s life.

“I dunno what to tell you, maybe I lost my touch.”

Sam shakes his head, stopping outside the jewelry store and looking at the displays. “I guess I was kind of hoping you’d say you found someone.”

Well in a way he has but come on, Dean with Cas? What fucking nonsense. Cas doesn’t want a relationship anyway and Dean isn’t gay. It’s not about feelings. It’s about pleasure. And money, a little but not really.

“Not everyone needs a partner like you do.”

Sam throws him a slanted, eerily contemplating look. “Too bad,” he mumbles and yeah sure, too fucking bad Sammy. “Anyway, what about that necklace?”

He points to some dainty thing but Dean’s eyes catch on a thick bracelet that he thinks would suit Cas, judging by the expensive watch he wears. Imagine him in only that bracelet, naked and begging for Dean’s cock, and…

Damnit.

“Yeah,” he mutters, hands in his jacket pockets. “Perfect.”

Absolutely fucking perfect.

Chapter Text

It’s December 22^nd the next time Dean meets Cas and he is more excited this time than he has been before. Mainly because it has been a while now, over a week since their last time, but also because he has taken some time to self-reflect. It’s not his strong suit but Dean is pretty damn proud of himself and how he has come to terms with his own desires.

He grins at Cas when the man stops just inside the hotel room’s door, pulling out his wallet.

“Hey,” he says, putting a hand on Cas’ wrist, catching his attention before he can pull out the money. “I wanna do something different today. If that’s okay with you?”

Cas tilts his head to the side and Dean realizes this is probably the closest they have been, aside from when Cas has his face planted in Dean’s crotch. Fuck okay, just thinking about it is making Dean’s dick twitch. Yeah, his body knows what’s coming, whether Cas says yes or not they’re in for a good time and Dean is excited.

“Will it still involve your cock in my mouth?”

Dean’s grin turns lecherous. “Yeah.”

“And you won’t physically harm me?”

That makes Dean frown. “Dude, no,” he states, the words harsh with how much emphasis he puts behind them.

It makes Cas smile. Damn, what kind of fucking partners has he had before? Well, considering he pulls people off the streets Dean supposes he is bound to end up with an asshole now and then.

“Then sure. What do you have in mind?”

Right. Focus, Winchester. Dean has been thinking about this for a while now, ever since their last time if he’s being honest and he’s slowly getting to a place where he wants to be. Where he can admit to things.

“Take off your coat and jacket,” he says, walking past Cas to the armchair in the corner opposite the bed. It’s a different room again, always different but always so similar at the same time. Chucking off his own jacket, he smirks when he sees Cas obeying without question. “Get one of them pillows and come kneel down for me.”

He sits down, legs spread, his belt clinking when he opens up, relieving pressure from his growing dick.

“Damn,” Cas murmurs, coming over and kneeling on the pillow like ordered, a small smile playing on his lips. “Is this where I start calling you Daddy, or Sir?”

Dean feels a jolt at the thought alone. Fuck, being called Sir by someone like Cas, in a setting like this? Yeah, Dean wouldn’t fucking mind that.

That’s kind of a huge realization for him, though, especially since he has never wanted something like that before, so for now he just glosses over how it makes him feel. All the need and raw desire set aside.

“Just Dean is fine,” he grunts, feeling arousal wash over him when Cas turns his blue eyes up on him, watching him silently. Waiting for his command. Fuck. “Now, for tonight we’re gonna do stuff a little differently.”

“Okay.” Cas slumps a little to the side, leaning on Dean’s right knee and Dean is man enough to admit that he likes that. Likes that Cas has gotten familiar enough with him that he dares to touch Dean so casually.

“Tonight you’re gonna suck me off, be the good little cocksucker you usually are,” he smirks when Cas seems to preen at the praise. “But you can’t take your dick out and jerk off.” His smirk grows when Cas’ brow draws tight with confusion. “Tonight you’re gonna keep it in your pants. You’re allowed to get hard. You’re allowed to stimulate yourself and to come, I encourage that.” He jostles his knee a little, bumping Cas. “But you can’t use your hands and you can’t take it out. D’you understand?”

Cas breathes out slowly, his whole body sagging a little, jaw going slack. Fuck, he’s getting off on this, on getting told what he can and can’t do, Dean can’t not notice the obvious signs and goddamn, that’s so fucking hot he has to pull out his dick and stroke it once.

“Yes,” Cas nearly hisses, pulling on the S in a way that makes it almost sound as if he was about to add Sir there at the end after all.

Dean’s body is already pumping with pleasure and he reaches greedily for Cas. “Good,” he grunts. “Now c’mere, darlin’. Put those pretty lips of yours to good use.”

The way Cas moans then, the hunger in his eyes, fuck it makes it all so much better. And then he swallows Dean’s dick, chokes himself on it, and yeah, Dean is in heaven right now. It’s not just the heat and the suction, the velvety embrace of Cas’ mouth, it’s all of that combined with how much Cas gets off on this too. Dean has never felt so fucking wanted in his life and it’s addictive, enticingly so. 

“Yeah, just like that,” he murmurs, thrusting lazing with Cas’ movements, following him, one hand on the side of Cas’ face, cupping him. “You take it all now, nice and slow.”

Every part of his dick, inch by inch, going in and out and it’s so fucking tight, so fucking hot. Dean feels his hips twitch, knows his body wants to slam in fast and hard but no, he wants to savor this moment. Because Cas has already started squirming and Dean watches greedily, eager to see what will happen. If Cas will make good on his promise and come all over himself, inside his pants.

If sucking Dean off really is special, good enough to make that happen.

Heat sears through him at the thought alone and it makes him hiss, scalp tingling with the pleasure that follows in the wake of that heat. Cas works his tongue so fucking cleverly, eliciting pleasure that Dean has never experienced before. Soft and wet, it pokes and prods, against the vein on the underside, around the sensitive head, pressing against the glands and fuck, there he suddenly goes, choking himself on Dean’s whole dick again.

It’s so fucking tight down there that Dean chokes himself. How can it still be so tight? How can he still after so many times, still react so much to this? A blowjob is a blowjob, no?

Definitely no, Dean knows that now. Has always known that skill makes a difference, of course, but there’s just something special about the way Cas does it. The wanton way he so eagerly sucks Dean down, the submissive looks he gives Dean while doing it, the way he reacts with such visceral pleasure to having a cock in his mouth

Having Dean’s cock in his mouth.

“Lookin’ so pretty like this,” Dean growls, brushing his thumb over Cas’ cheek, wiping away a stray tear from the corner of Cas’ eye. “How you doin’ down here? Feeling good?”

He shifts, intending to only nudge Cas’ inner thigh or crotch with the toe of his boot but the way Cas reacts almost makes Dean think he kicked him in the nuts. He pulls off Dean’s dick with a slopping wet sound, moaning so deeply his whole ribcage ought to be rattling. Bending over, he plants his face in Dean’s crotch, one hand holding Dean’s dick and the other shooting down to grab onto Dean’s foot, holding him still as he grinds up.

He’s so fucking hard. Dean’s breath hitches at the mere feeling of it. Hard enough that he can feel it through his goddamn boot.

“Dean,” he whimpers when Dean puts even the slightest pressure on him. “Dean.”

“Fucking hell, darlin’,” Dean mumbles, completely transfixed.

He feels Cas’ dick jumping, straining, and afterwards Dean will reflect on how not disgusted he’d gotten. But right now he is too immersed in how fucking great this feels. How goddamn superior he feels and, suddenly more than that, how stoked he is that Cas can feel such pleasure just from sucking Dean off. Just from doing sexy things with him.

The next thought hits him without any conscious deliberation: what else can they do together that will make Cas feel good? How else can Dean satisfy this man?

“If you keep—ah—keep doing that…”

Dean is pulled out of his trance at Cas’ words. Arousal crashes over him and he grabs Cas’ hair, pulling his head back so that their eyes can meet at the same time as he presses down harder on Cas’ desperate dick.

“Or what?” he asks, grinning lewdly. “You’ll come?” his body surges with pleasure when Cas whimpers wordlessly. “C’mon now, darlin’. Don’t forget why we’re actually here.”

Arching his back, he juts his hips out, smearing the head of his leaking dick against Cas’ cheek. It makes Cas moan so fucking throatily Dean can’t even think straight, and then he melts against the chair again when Cas takes him back in his mouth. He has both hands up on Dean’s hips now, holding on while he bobs on Dean’s dick. Down below them, out of view for Dean now, Cas is grinding against Dean’s foot and fuck if Dean is about to remove it.

It feels so fucking good, the way Cas sucks him off and uses his body as a toy to get off on. He feels a rush of power and desire, mixing deliciously, dangerously, and fuck, he’s so close now. His balls are tight, tingling every time Cas goes deep enough that his lips and chin bump them.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, spreading his legs. “Yeah, just like that.”

Cas whines when Dean moves his foot and he can’t help but grin predatorily down at him. Just to make sure Cas really understands Dean isn’t leaving, he rubs his foot gently against Cas’ dick. It makes him moan, and a string of saliva connects his lips to Dean’s dick when he pulls off.

“I can’t…”

“Can’t come like this?” Dean smirks. Fuck he wants to come. Wants to do it all over Cas’ face again.

“Can’t hold it,” Cas chokes, hips moving in short little aborted thrusts.

His hand squeezes Dean’s dick and it’s the only fucking thing keeping Dean from nutting all over right then.

“Do it,” he growls, grabbing Cas by his neck and hauling him closer. “Come now and I’ll follow you.”

Cas makes a choked off little sound and sinks down on Dean’s dick, throat clicking and tongue lapping greedily. His desperation makes it clear how close he is, more than how his lower body squirms, and it makes Dean’s pleasure shoot through the fucking roof.

It’s tight, it’s hot, his whole body is taut and sweaty and he wants to be naked and wants to touch Cas more. Touch him differently.

“Fuck,” he grunts, thumb pressing in against Cas’ neck and that’s apparently all Cas needs.

The last little push before his whole body jolts and then he sags against Dean and the armchair, hips jerking and Dean would have been able to feel the warm wetness that spreads in Cas’ crotch if only he hadn’t had his boot on. Why the fuck does he even have boots on?

“Good,” he groans. “So fucking good, Cas.”

One half-hearted attempt at swallowing is all Cas has to do and fuck yeah, Dean feels his orgasm not as an explosion but as a tidal wave, washing out of him, bringing only feelings of greatness. It feels so fucking exhilarating that Dean can do nothing but slump down in his seat and breathe out with a smile.

Cas takes everything like the good little cockslut he is and Dean finds himself combing his fingers through Cas’ hair as the other man licks him mostly clean.

“Damn,” he murmurs after a moment spent trying to regain his senses. He’s not successful but fuck it, he doesn’t have to make sense when he is with Cas. “You really did it, huh?”

“When the cock is good enough and the person pleasing enough,” Cas grins up at him, holding Dean’s softening dick in one hand. “There’s really no stopping it, right?”

“I guess,” Dean mumbles, looking down at Cas with contemplating eyes. He still has his foot gently resting against Cas’ dick, even though he can’t feel it anymore, and it feels kind of nice, touching even after the fact. “So, uh, it was good?”

Or was it too forceful, is what he is asking but he doesn’t have the means to voice his concerns right now. Cas anyhow seems pleased enough and he even kisses Dean’s dick once before sitting back, leaning on his hip and Dean’s leg again.

“It was great,” he says happily and Dean feels a twist inside him that he hasn’t felt before. Not with Cas and not with anyone else. “And hey, you should know I wouldn’t mind having your thick cock in my tight ass, if you were inclined to try it with a man.” He winks and gets up on visibly wobbly legs. “I mean, I know you’re straight and all, but the offer is there.”

Dean stares with wide eyes, heart thumping hard for some fucked up reason. “I, uh, thanks.”

“Any time,” Cas grins and then turns towards the bathroom. “I gotta go wash up, you can leave if you want to. Oh, and my wallet is in my coat. Merry Christmas, Dean.”

He slips into the bathroom with that and Dean is almost too stunned to leave before he comes out again, but he does manage to unglue himself from his seat. Not too stunned to leave, but definitely too stunned to remember the token money, as he will discover later when he is alone in his apartment and reflecting on Cas’ offer. And how much he wanted to fucking accept right then and there.

*****

Because of everything that has happened, Dean spends a disproportionate amount of time thinking about sex with Cas. Thinking about anal, about how different it might be with a man compared to a woman. Thinking about it so hard that he almost misses out on Christmas with Sam and Jess but no, he’s not that distracted. Christmas is important to him, especially the time spent with Sam, but it’s a close call.

In the end he does manage to stay normal, spending an awesome holiday with his little brother and Jess’ family, but afterwards he reverts right back to his pre-Christmas state and spends too much time imagining Cas hanging off his dick, begging for Dean to do him good. Fuck him harder, faster, to touch him like only Dean can. It’s some distracting fucking images, Dean’ll tell you that.

It's enough to get his body going and he finds himself jerking off more than is appropriate. He wants desperately to meet up with Cas, to at least get blown good and well in the interim, while he decides on what to do with that goddamn offer. But to his displeasure Cas texts him back to tell him he is a few states over, visiting family for the holidays.

“When the fuck are you back, then?” Dean grumps, feeling his dick rioting already.

Turns out Cas won’t be returning until after New Year’s and Dean is at once annoyed at the wait and pleased that Cas so readily relayed that information. As if they can text about mundane things like that too, as if something more than just sex between them can be a thing.

Happy New Year’s then, Dean texts back just because and can’t help but smile at Cas’ little You too. It doesn’t mean anything, of course, and yet it means a lot and Dean feels himself becoming distracted in a whole different way, because of something other than imagining fucking Cas good and hard.

For New Year’s, Dean goes out with his friends like he usually does. Sam of course spends it with Jess and Dean doesn’t resent him that, even if he is slightly jealous. It’s a first for him, that feeling in regard to something like this, always having prided himself in being a lone wolf who basically sleeps around to satiate that primal need. This year he feels deflated, somehow, for reasons he is yet to grasp, and it makes him sullen and quiet.

“Are you okay?” Benny asks when he comes back to the booth Dean has been holding for them.

They’re at a busy and fucking awesome club, Lee having already found someone to distract him. Benny and Garth are still around, thankfully, even if it seems Garth has been momentarily delayed at the bar. Or maybe he went to the restroom? Dean shouldn’t be drinking too much right now, not in his state of mind.

“I’m peachy.”

“Uh huh,” Benny says, definitely not believing Dean. He takes a swig of his beer, eyeing Dean pointedly.

“I’m, uh…” to be honest, Dean doesn’t really know what he is. Confused about Cas’ offer and how much he wants to accept, maybe? Definitely weirded out by how much he kind of actually would like Cas to be here, right now. But only as a cockwarmer. Sure, yeah.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me,” Benny smiles, that open and companionable smile that always puts Dean at ease. “It’s just that you’re quiet and I’m pretty damn sure that brunette that Lee is talking to was flirting with you first.”

What brunette? Dean hadn’t noticed shit.

Downing the last of his Old Fashioned, Dean comes to a decision.

“I’m thinking about anal.”

Okay, maybe he should have decided on a better approach before he started talking…

Benny takes it in stride, though, bless him. “I vote yes,” he smirks. “It’s tight and nice.”

Dean swallows, looking into his empty glass rather than the eyes of his best friend. “Does it matter with who?”

“Whom.”

“What?”

Benny laughs, slapping Dean on his back. “I’m just messing with you. No it doesn’t matter! Or do you mean like one of those Family Guy things? Would I rather with a goat than a constipated woman?”

Dean scrunches up his nose. “What the hell kind of question is that?”

Benny laughs again, the sound almost drowned by the cheer that arises from the crowd in the club when the DJ starts playing the latest hit of mindless dance music. Dean watches Benny as if in slow-motion, knowing he has had too much to drink and starting to feel loose and good about that. As if talking about this doesn’t have to be too hard after all.

“Come on, then,” Benny clinks his beer against Dean’s empty glass. “Hit me with yours.”

Dean shakes his head. “It ain’t nothing like that.” Sighing, he decides to take the plunge. “There’s this, uh, person…” that doesn’t feel right. Feels inadequate to call Cas a “person” and nothing more.

“Go on.”

Dean grimaces. “Look, here’s the thing. I’ve been, uh, meeting up with… With a guy.”

Benny straightens a little and it’s clear that he tries to shake the brain fog the booze has brought on. Dean is immensely happy they’re still alone in their booth.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, uh, it’s been… Like, it’s been nothing, okay?” he doesn’t even know why he is trying to rationalize this or explain it. “It’s just that he likes to suck cock and like, I have one that will, uh,” he gestures to his crotch, hidden by the table they are leaned on. “That works for him, okay?”

For him. For Cas. Maybe not for other men, Dean wouldn’t know and he doesn’t care to find out.

Benny nods slowly. “Okay. Sounds like a mutually beneficial setup.”

“Yeah!” Dean exclaims, snapping his fingers and pointing at Benny. “Thank you, yeah. Nothing weird with that, right?”

Benny shrugs, taking another swig of his beer. “Not that I see.”

Okay, good. That certainly makes Dean feel better. Judging by how Benny and Garth had reacted when Dean offered the theoretical blowjob scenario with a man or Pamela Anderson, he kind of figured Benny would be cool with this too, but it feels nice to hear it out loud.

“Yeah, great.”

He jerks when Benny puts a hand on his arm.

“Dean, brother, were you concerned I would start spewing some hateful shit?” Benny looks softly at him. “I’d hoped you know me better than that.”

Dean nods, swallowing. “Yeah like, I do. I know you’re not an asshole. I’m just…” he shakes his head, sighing. “I just feel weird.”

“Weird how? Because you like to get sucked off?”

“By a man,” Dean clarifies but Benny shakes his head.

“What difference does it make?”

Dean honestly doesn’t know. “It’s just so much fucking better, okay? It’s weird how much better it is with him.”

“Maybe he is just better? Experience and all that shit.”

Dean purses his lips, brow drawn tight in thought. “I used to think that too. Because believe me, he is enthusiastic.” He shakes his head. “But that doesn’t explain why no one else draws my attention anymore and why I feel irrationally irritated at the thought of him finding someone else to suck off when he’s not with me.”

That makes Benny smirk. “Getting possessive?”

“He’s away over the holidays,” Dean states heatedly. “He could be finding all sorts of men right now.”

“Yeah. So?”

Dean stares incredulously at Benny. “So—” he cuts himself off because Benny has a point, of course. What does it matter?

“Is he a sex friend or a boyfriend?” Benny asks seriously and Dean is thrown for a loop.

Cas, his boyfriend? This conversation was just supposed to be about whether wanting to have anal sex with a man would make him gay or not, and if it does, if that is a bad thing or not.

“I’m not there yet,” Dean mumbles weakly, looking at Benny with a spooked expression.

It seems to catch Benny off guard and he looks surprised before smiling kindly. “That’s fine. Just askin’. What were you asking, though? About anal? You wanna try it with this dude?”

Dean instantly starts sweating. “It’s just that he…” Dean stares wildly at his friend for a moment, mind replaying Cas looking all pleased like he usually does after orgasming, asking that with such a straight goddamn face. “He offered,” he finishes lamely.

Benny seems to contemplate this and Dean pretends he isn’t nervous as fuck about this whole discussion.

“So lemme get this right,” Benny taps his finger against the neck of his beer bottle in thought. “You’ve got this guy who likes to suck off your cock. And you like it when he does that, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Dean hates how squeaky his voice is but clearing it after speaking seems pointless.

“And now he has offered to what? Do anal with you?”

Dean swallows and suddenly this conversation feels insanely private. It was just between him and Cas, right? But fuck it, he has come this far now, too far to turn around.

“He basically said he wouldn’t mind it if I wanted to fuck him,” he says in a low hush, low enough that Benny has to lean in a little. “He wants me inside him.”

Fuck it feels good to say that out loud though. Hell yeah Cas wants him inside, wants Dean to fucking mess him up.

Benny nods, shrugging. “I’d do it.”

“What?”

It can’t be that easy, it just can’t.

His no doubt stupid face makes Benny grin. “Why the hell not? If you like doing sexy stuff with this guy and he likes doing it with you so much he offers to do more, then why the fuck not jump on the opportunity? You’ve done anal before, I know you have, so you know you like that, right?”

Dean swallows, remembering those fumbling attempts at college with Rhonda Hurley. Awesome but faraway and seemingly nothing compared to Cas.

“Yeah…”

“Are you just concerned because it’s a dude?”

Of course that’s it, why the fuck else would Dean be hesitating? Although as soon as that thought enters his mind and he bristles about it, he instantly regrets his own reactions and biases. Because why the hell would it matter? A hole is a hole, right?

He sighs deeply, rubbing his face.

“Maybe I’m just a bit homophobic?” he murmurs, feeling tired as fuck.

“Nah, I think you’re just not being honest with yourself.”

That makes Dean glare at his friend but Benny just grins, drinking from his beer.

“The fuck does that mean?”

“It means you think it feels nice but you’re too stubborn to admit it feels like that because of underlying feelings you’re not ready to admit to yet.”

“What feels nice?”

Dean jumps when Garth joins them but judging by how Benny decidedly does not react to their friend sitting down at the booth with them, Dean is the only one self-absorbed enough to not notice his surroundings.

“Anal,” Benny grins.

“Oh,” Garth looks a little lost and shy. Cute, maybe, but Dean isn’t going there. “I’ve never, um…”

“You’re missing out,” Benny winks, saluting Garth by raising his almost empty beer bottle.

“Okay,” Garth says, smiling. “I’ll believe you.”

“Great,” Benny elbows Dean in the side, grinning. “Right, Dean?”

“You’ve done it too?” Garth asks in a conversational tone, as if they’re discussing that new pizza place downtown. “Or you wanna try it?”

“I’ve done it,” Dean grunts, then shakes his head. “No I mean I wanna try, no like…” he sighs roughly, making Garth’s eyebrows shoot to the roof.

“He’s done it but he wants to try it again,” Benny says in a teasing tone. “But the situation is outside of Dean’s usual spectrum this time.”

“Okay,” Garth smiles benignly. “How so?”

“It was a guy that offered,” Dean grunts, sneaking a glance at Garth and seeing the meaning of his words sink in slowly.

He nods after a slow inhale that Dean might or might not have imagined. “Then what’s the problem? Are you getting hung up on his gender?”

“I dunno,” Dean grits out, hands to his sides, feeling exposed and vulnerable. “I wanna fuck a dude, doesn’t that make me gay? Or something, I dunno—”

“Bi-curious?” Benny suggests but Dean ignores him.

“Doesn’t it mean something I should take into account?”

The look Garth gives him then is possibly the most serious look Dean has ever seen on his friend.

“It doesn’t have to mean anything and it won’t make you anything other than what you already are. You are you, no matter your sexuality,” he states clearly and more soberly than the drink in his hand suggests. “So you wanna try having sex with someone of the same gender, so what? And like, is this about a special man or just any guy?” he fiddles with his glass, taking a sip and looking to the side.

“I—” Dean straightens, momentarily stumped.

It’s Benny’s cheery guffaw that pulls Dean into the present again. “I think it’s a special guy, right Dean?”

“Uh, yeah.”

Calling Cas special is nothing short of an understatement, Dean thinks but he doesn’t elaborate on that, no need to make himself seem fucking infatuated or something stupid like that.

“Okay then,” Garth says, smiling. “Maybe you’re just a little heteroflexible then.”

“Hetero-whatnow?” Dean asks and feels Benny pat him reassuringly on his arm.

“Flaxy,” he says confidently, as if that’s the right word.

Garth rolls his eyes. “Flexible. It’s a part of the sexuality spectrum,” he elaborates kindly. “It basically means you’re mostly straight but you can go gay for this special person.”

“So bi?” Benny asks, curious.

Garth shrugs. “More like mostly straight.”

“That’s like you,” Benny exclaims happily, slapping Dean on his shoulder. “Mostly straight, except for this one dude who likes to suck you off.”

“And who you apparently wanna bump uglies with,” Garth offers, sipping noisily from his drink.

It’s impossible not to imagine it then. What it would feel like to be inside Cas, to be on top of him as Dean fucks him slowly, deliberately. To hear him moan and beg for Dean, to feel his hard dick against Dean’s own. To maybe even touch him like Cas touches him, to suck him off. To kiss him.

“Yeah, okay,” he mumbles, feeling as if he is in a trance. “Yeah, maybe that is me.”

“Are you imagining fucking him right now?” Benny asks with fake disgust lacing his words. “That’s for the bedroom, dude.”

That makes Garth giggle and Dean listens to his two best friends’ banter for a while, feeling an inner peace settle over him.

“Is it really okay, then?” he asks in a low tone, just as Benny is about to get up to get a new round of drinks.

“What is?” Garth asks at the same time as Benny answers, “Yeah I’ll get this one and you can get the next one.”

Dean shakes his head at Benny, who sits back down, looking confused.

“I mean, are you really okay with me wanting that?”

“Dean,” Garth says, tone bordering on exasperated, though he is smiling. “Of course we are.”

“Are you asking because of…?” Benny trails off, gesturing to the vicinity of the bar. The last place any of them saw Lee this evening. He looks grim when Dean nods. “Dean, I assure you, we are more than okay with it.”

“Yeah,” Garth says and smiles sweetly. “You know what I always say. As long as it’s between two consenting adults in a safe environment, anything goes,” his brow draws tight in thought for a moment. “Or two consenting teenagers of the same age, I suppose. Ah you know what I mean. Consent is sexy!”

Dean nods, smiling. “Thank you.”

“And he’ll come around, should anything happen,” Benny says, almost dismissively, and then starts inching his way out of the booth again. “Don’t you worry about that.”

“Do you think anything will happen, though?” Garth asks when they are alone and Dean frowns at his question. “I mean,” Garth continues. “I have a feeling you wouldn’t really have brought it up if it was just about sex. So, do you think you want more with this special man of yours?”

“I, uh…”

Oh fuck, does he?

*****

The next time Dean and Cas meet up is the week after New Year’s and there is a strained sort of urgency to the whole thing. A kind of electricity that seems to anchor the two men together, that heightens every sensation, physical or otherwise.

As soon as they are inside the hotel room of choice, Cas rounds on Dean, pressing him up against the wall. Dean, in turn, grabs Cas and hauls him closer, much closer than needed for what they usually do. There’s a scant inch between them, eyes locked and breathing rougher. Dean licks his lips and Cas parts his and fucking hell, Dean wants it.

But then suddenly the moment is broken by Cas stepping back, chuckling unevenly and carding a hand through his already tousled hair.

“Sorry,” he grins, shrugging off his coat and tossing it on the hook next to the door. “I guess I’m just eager.”

Dean swallows with a click and removes his own jacket while Cas slinks to the floor. No pillow this time it seems, no time for trivial things like that.

“Yeah?” Dean says gruffly, cupping Cas’ chin with one hand and using the other to stop Cas from opening his jeans. “You hankering for some cock?”

“Yes,” Cas moans and Dean can see it on his face, in the way Cas’ pretty eyes dilute with desire. Fuck, he feels it in himself too, already too fucking invested and all they have done is walk side by side to this goddamn room.

“Didn’t get any while you were away, did ya?”

Stupid question to ask really. It makes him seem weak and needy in his own eyes and he isn’t even sure what he will do with the answer. Be happy if Cas says no? Be disappointed if he says yes?

“No,” Cas states, shaking his head, and Dean experiences a kind of out of body sensation brought on by relief mixing with a weird kind of hope.

Huh, guess he got his fucking answer right there.

“No?” he mocks because he can’t not be an ass. Dragging his thumb over Cas’ lips, he smirks down at the man kneeling for him. “Because you couldn’t find a cock good enough, or because you didn’t have time to try?”

Cas shakes his head again, fingers flexing against Dean’s crotch, but he doesn’t pull out of Dean’s lax grip.

“I don’t want another cock,” he says then, voice deliciously rumbly. “I haven’t wanted it for a long time. I like your taste.”

“That’s right,” Dean grunts, valiantly trying to ignore how Cas’ confession makes him feel, and what the implications of it can be. “That’s fucking right, darlin’. C’mon now, take what you want.”

Cas makes a needy kind of noise at the back of his throat and he is quick to work Dean’s jeans open, fingers clever as they easily find Dean’s already hardening dick and pull it out so that he can lick it into his mouth.

“Fuck yeah,” Dean sighs, stroking Cas’ soft hair. “You too, c’mon.” He nudges Cas’ knee with his boot, grinning when Cas peeks up at him, mouth full of Dean’s dick. “Jerk off for me.”

A shudder goes through Cas’ body and he seems to sag a little. It’s a small cue Dean has learned over the months now, something that tells him Cas is going deep into his pleasure and Dean fucking loves seeing it, especially like this. Would that be different in bed then? When Dean is buried balls deep inside Cas’ little hole? Would Cas go all slack for Dean to manhandle as he wishes, pliant and needy at the same time?

Pleasure crests painfully and so suddenly Dean almost sees stars. Shit, okay, maybe he is a bit more pent up than he had thought. But whatever, it’s fine. They’re here to feel good together anyway and Cas seems just as desperate as Dean feels. He is already stroking his dick fast and hard, whole body moving as he sucks Dean off sloppily while pleasuring himself.

Dean stares, transfixed, at how Cas touches himself. How rough and urgent his movements are, how his body seems to yearn for absolution so much Cas can do nothing but surrender to the pleasure. Fuck it looks good.

Good enough that Dean kind of forgets his own pleasure for a moment and all he can think about is how he wants to touch Cas too. It runs on a loop in his mind, clouding his senses. Faster and faster, eyesight growing fuzzy, mind blanking out, dick and balls aching with the kind of heat that’s completely and absolutely unstoppable.

IwannatouchIwannatouchIwannatouch. I. Want. To. Touch.

“Aw, fuck,” he groans, one hand holding Cas still as he empties inside the other man.

Cas jolts with surprise and some of Dean’s come spills out to dribble down his chin, but he moans wantonly and swallows dutifully. It feels so good, the way Cas just accepts him, takes all Dean has to offer and still yearns for more, and Dean can barely breathe for a moment there. Caught on the edge, dick pumping, fighting to stay conscious enough that he won’t just slam all the way inside Cas and actually hurt him. But fuck how he wants to be inside.

“Fucking hell,” he sighs when he can finally breathe again. He still has his semi-hard dick inside Cas’ mouth and the way Cas suckles him makes it seem as if he is hoping for more. Or maybe it’s Dean who needs more. “Now you,” he grunts, nudging Cas with his boot again. “Come now, darlin’. Do it for me.”

Cas pulls off with a little “phaw” sound, seemingly gasping and choking at the same time, and then he comes wetly on the floor between Dean’s feet. The splattering sound is loud in Dean’s ears and suddenly, irrationally, all he wants is to feel it on him.

“That was really good,” Cas says with a little chuckle that brings Dean out of his spiraling thoughts. “I needed that. Damn.”

He gets up on legs that seem unsteady enough that Dean has to hold him so he won’t fall. He chuckles again and their eyes lock once more. The urge to kiss Cas, even though his whole mouth is probably full of Dean’s own taste, is so strong Dean sways on his feet before he manages to turn away.

“Hah, yeah,” he says, smiling and hoping it doesn’t look weird. “Me too.”

“Sorry I didn’t ask what you wanted to do before we started.”

Dean shakes his head, feeling suddenly very conscious of the fact that he still has his hand on the small of Cas’ back and they are standing this close with their dicks out.

“It’s fine. We’re, uh, we’re fine.”

Cas’ smile is blinding. “Great. You can help yourself to my wallet while I wash up, and don’t forget to take money to cover last time too.”

“Yeah, uh,” Dean closes his eyes for a moment, swallowing. “I think we both know I ain’t gonna do that.”

Cas is looking intently at him when Dean opens his eyes again. The moment stretches on, the implication of Dean’s words ballooning between them.

“Okay,” Cas says then, smiling in a secret little way that Dean wants to own. “I’m going to feel good about that.”

Dean doesn’t know what he means but he can’t help but grab Cas’ shirt when he moves to walk away.

“What you said last time,” he starts when Cas looks questioningly at him. “About my cock in your ass. Does… Does that offer still stand?”

A look of pure and raw primal desire passes over Cas’ handsome face and Dean feels his whole body surge hotly with arousal.

“Now more than ever,” Cas rumbles and surprises the fuck out of Dean by leaning in to brush his lips against Dean’s cheek. “Do with that what you will.”

What Dean does with that is think about it so intensely he fucks up at work, forgets to go to his usual gym workout with Benny, and manages to fucking think himself into an orgasm late at night in bed.

Come prepared next time, he texts Cas after that stupidly spectacular orgasm, and then subsequently rubs another one out after Cas sends an affirmative back, along with a time and day.

Chapter Text

It’s altogether too long until they meet next time and at the same time exactly how long Dean needs to calm himself down. He is both excited and nervous, and very annoyed with himself. Feels like a fucking pussy for being nervous about sex, just because Cas is a man. Or is it just that?

No, Dean thinks as he enters the assigned room and Cas turns with a smile, it’s not just about Cas’ gender. It’s Cas. He puts Dean on edge, makes him keep guessing about his next emotional response to whatever Cas does, and Dean fucking loves it. Feels fucking alive.

“Dean,” Cas says, throwing his coat on the armchair. The armchair, not the bed, because that will be used for other things. Dean swallows. “I just got here.”

“Good timing, then,” Dean says gruffly, throwing a cocky smile mostly for show.

He shrugs off his jacket just as Cas crosses the distance between them and he barely has time to hang it on the hook by the door before Cas is all up in his damn business. It’s similar to what happened last time and Dean feels his body surge for that kiss now, stronger than before, even if he had been the one to say no to kisses to begin with.

“I’ve been looking forward to this,” Cas murmurs, eyes already blowing out. “Can’t wait to feel you like this.”

Dean huffs out a smirk and grabs Cas, spinning them around so that he can press Cas’ chest up against the wall while Dean drapes himself over the other man’s back.

“Only it won’t be like that,” he growls against Cas’ ear, bringing Cas’ hands up to plant them on the wall. “It’ll be like this,” he emphasizes his words by grinding slowly against Cas’ butt. This position, this level of control afforded Dean. “And you’ll like it.”

Cas looks at him over his shoulder, eyes dark. “Yeah,” he breathes out, body shuddering in Dean’s grip. “Yeah, I will.”

Fuck, Dean thinks when a rush of carnal desire rips through him, fucking hell.

“Good,” he murmurs, dick definitely responding when they move with each other, small little circles that make heat travel all over. “Good.”

Cas licks his lips and Dean wants to kiss him again. “Just let me wash up first,” he begs in a hush, neck craning to keep eye-contact with Dean. “I want to be fresh.”

“Fine,” Dean says, unnecessarily harshly since he has no real objection to Cas taking a shower. “You go and doll yourself up for me,” he lets Cas go with an almost feral smirk. “I’ll wait here.”

Cas makes a little choked off sound at the back of his throat and even though Dean steps back, he remains plastered to the wall for a second longer. As if he needs to collect himself. Yeah, Dean likes that thought.

He crosses his arms, still smirking as he watches Cas try to calm down. It takes a moment, but then Cas throws him a furtive glance and shuffles into the bathroom. Fuck, okay, Dean could really get used to the high Cas’ responses to him gives him. It’s addictive and alluring and Dean can already feel pleasure and arousal mixing inside him.

He waits until Cas has closed the door and he hears the shower turn on. He had told Cas to come prepared but doesn’t really expect Cas to hang on his every word like a command so he doesn’t know what to expect here. Maybe Cas just wants to shower off the day’s sweat and grime or maybe he needs to do the prepping.

Dean has only had anal once and it was back in college but Rhonda had insisted on doing the prepping herself. Dean takes a moment to wonder if he would have minded doing it with Cas, for him. It feels like a gargantuan leap, though, so he doesn’t entertain the thought for too long. Or how well his body responds to images of Cas squirming on Dean’s fingers while Dean whispers filth in his ear.

“Damn, okay,” Dean grunts, rubbing the back of his head harshly before going over to the armchair.

Whispering filth… Just like he had done now? You go and doll yourself up for me, where had that even come from? Dean has never spoken to anyone like that, not the women he has slept with before and certainly not to any man. But he’d been caught up in the mood and Cas seems to like it when Dean gets a little rough like that.

Muttering to himself, a little confused and still aroused, he starts undressing. He doesn’t think he needs a shower too, since he had one right before leaving and he doesn’t think he will have started smelling after only the short car ride here. Guess he’ll check with Cas when he comes back out.

Undressed down to his underwear, Dean hesitates. Should he get fully naked? Cas will probably be naked, right? Coming out of the shower and walking directly in here. It seems logical but he nonetheless keeps his underwear on for now, the last vestiges of some kind of dignity in case Cas has managed to change his mind in there. Or maybe it’s Dean who is on the cusp of changing his mind, this whole situation feeling absurd compared to the reality he usually lives in.

But then there is no more fucking time because that’s Cas, coming out of the bathroom with only a towel around his slim waist and shit, Dean didn’t even notice that the shower had turned off.

“Feeling good?” he asks only because the silence is suffocating him.

“Yes, thank you, I—” Cas cuts himself off the moment he looks up and his eyes land on Dean, standing mostly naked by the bed. “Oh shit,” he chokes, putting a hand over his mouth and instantly looking to the side.

“What?” Dean asks, almost looking behind himself as if Cas spotted something over there in the corner behind the armchair. “Are you okay?”

He walks over to Cas and sees how his eyes cut to Dean and then away again. A sickening feeling starts at the pit of his stomach, something about Cas not liking what he sees. Dean has been complimented on his face and body before but that was from women, what the fuck does he know what a man would want?

“Yes,” Cas rasps, clears his throat and then speaks in an equally raspy voice. “Yes, I’m—hm. It’s just that you…”

“Me what?” Dean asks, demands, and stops right in front of Cas when he puts out a hand to keep Dean from coming too close.

Maybe it’s the scar, he thinks. The starfish scar that stretches over his left pec and up over his shoulder. Some people think it’s a little off-putting but Dean has always been proud of that scar. He’d saved a little girl from a burning building when he got it, and now it serves as a constant reminder that even he can do good things. That and the postcards the girl, now teenager, sends to the fire station now and then.

Cas surprises him by closing the distance, palm flat against Dean’s chest, close to his scar.

“You look so good.”

Dean is taken aback by the raw sincerity in Cas’ words. Strangled, almost unintelligent words that spill out in a rush, Cas’ eyes wild when they meet Dean’s surprised stare.

“Oh?” he finds himself quickly, smirking. “You like what you see, darlin’?”

Cas’ fingers flex on Dean’s chest. “Do… Do you work out or something?”

Yeah, Dean is enjoying this. Enjoys it a whole fucking lot. Cas is usually so calm and confident it’s intoxicating to see him lose his cool like this. It’s different to how he becomes when he’s choking on Dean’s dick, but also similar in so many ways.

“I go to the gym,” he shrugs. “The Fire Chief wants us to keep in shape.”

“You’re a firefighter?” Cas almost fucking squeaks and Dean’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead for a second.

“That something that piques your interest, darlin’?” he drawls, stepping in closer and putting one hand on the small of Cas’ back to pull him in so that their bodies align.

“Ah, don’t,” Cas nearly moans, one hand grabbing Dean’s arm and the other fisting against his chest. “I’m—”

He moans for real when Dean presses a leg between Cas’, feeling the hardness there.

“What’s this then?” he murmurs, leaning in to ghost his lips along Cas’ jaw. “Already getting excited, hm?”

Cas breathes out unevenly, melting against Dean. “I’m sorry.”

“Naughty,” Dean chuckles darkly. “Startin’ by yourself. What did you really do in that shower?”

“Just-just washing off.”

True enough, his skin is a little damp and his hair is slicked back. Dean has no doubt Cas was just rinsing off and maybe checking his allegedly tight little hole, but it’s too much fun teasing him for Dean to stop.

“And how are you feelin’ now then?” he asks, putting a hand between them without thinking. Cas gasps and bucks into Dean’s touch. “You ready to go?”

“Y-yeah,” Cas says breathily and it doesn’t strike Dean that he’s touching Cas’ dick for the first time until he pulls away.

Fuck, that fucking escalated, didn’t it? Well Dean isn’t about to be sorry for that and if he’s going to have a gay panic, he will reserve that for later. Right now he can think of nothing other than pressing into Cas’ tight heat. He smirks when Cas looks at him with hooded eyes. There’s a little touch to the back of his hand and then Cas is walking unsteadily over to the bed. The beckoning, the shy look, even if it’s fake, sure as fuck amps up Dean’s arousal and he follows, a certain swagger to his step now that absolutely does not go unnoticed by Cas.

He breathes out, as if steadying himself, and then turns his back to Dean before removing the towel. It’s weird, until Dean realizes Cas is being considerate of Dean’s supposed sexuality. No matter how much he seems to want Dean’s touch, how much he enjoyed Dean rubbing him over the towel, he still has enough sense to think about the fact that Dean is a straight man about to sleep with another man for the first time.

Well fuck, that won’t do. Dean wants Cas to become a sloppy mess, to forget all sense of decorum and to completely lose himself in the pleasure.

Stepping up to Cas, he presses against the man’s back similarly to how he had done it by the door less than thirty minutes ago.

“Tell me,” he growls against Cas’ ear, arms circling his chest, hands roaming. “Tell me how you want to be touched. How you wanna be fucked.”

Cas sighs, leaning back against Dean and fuck, maybe Dean is in a little over his head because he can’t really bring himself to look down at Cas’ dick. Even though he has seen it multiple times now.

“Do me from behind,” Cas rumbles after a moment, eyes searching when he looks over his shoulder. “I like that.”

Does he? Or does he want to please Dean, who stated earlier that he would fuck Cas from behind? Fuck it, Dean thinks, avoiding eye-contact by stepping away, the time for hesitance and overthinking is done. He needs to do this now, needs to let his dick speak for him.

“On the bed, then,” he says gruffly and waits until Cas is on it before he moves over.

“The nightstand,” Cas says then, gesturing to the one next to him. “I didn’t know what size.”

Several packages of pre-lubed condoms are stacked there and Dean grins. How considerate. He can almost picture Cas standing there in the aisle, contemplating Dean’s size.

“Shouldn’t you know?” he asks mockingly and picks the size he usually wears. “Having choked on it enough times.”

Cas only moans, hanging his head and fuck okay, that makes quite the scene. Cas is on his knees, leaned down on his forearms, ass canted up and a pretty blush spreading down his curved back. Between his legs, Dean can glimpse his hard dick and the urge to touch is almost overwhelming. What will it feel like? How will Cas react?

“Fuck,” he mutters, surprised by his own arousal, the level of it.

Cas makes a questioning sound but Dean ignores him, instead pulling off his underwear to roll on the condom.

The bed dips when he gets on it and Cas moves with it, seemingly seeking out Dean’s heat. It’s a kind of neediness Dean has never seen in his lovers before and something he instantly yearns for. Wants more of Cas relying on him, seeking him out for comfort and pleasure.

Cas hums when Dean drags his hands up and down his back, feeling how hot Cas is, how smooth his skin is. Blemish-free and pretty, nothing like Dean’s own, and Dean finds himself marveling at how beautiful this obvious man is. He is sitting on his knees behind Cas, dick just shy of rubbing against his ass and he can practically feel how much Cas wants him to lean in. To thrust, to grind.

Dean grins to himself, pleased at how much Cas wants him. It’s that familiar rush again but somehow more significant, not so gloating and arrogant anymore.

“You like my hands on you, darlin’?” he drawls, smacking Cas’ left cheek lightly. The way Cas jolts and moans and the slight impact makes Dean think there could be something there. Fuck yeah, bet Cas can come up with all kinds of dirty shit Dean has never even dreamed of. “Lookin’ good,” he grunts, smirking to himself as he starts groping Cas’ ass. “And what’s this here? ‘Tight hole’ was it?” he presses both thumbs in deep, deeper than he ever went with Rhonda.

It's fine now, she’d said, grinning. You can just go in. I’m ready.

Maybe neither of them had been ready, but Dean remembers it with great pleasure. With Cas it’s different, though, because of course it is. Everything is different with him and Dean finds himself getting drunk on the prospect of exploring what that means, what it can mean for the future.

“God, Dean,” Cas moans wantonly when Dean thumbs his hole.

It’s slick and hot and it’s going to be such a tight squeeze Dean feels his own ass constrict at the thought. His dick jumps, egged on by how Cas wriggles for him, and it bumps Cas’ ass.

“Yeah,” Dean says breathlessly when Cas moans something unintelligible. “You feelin’ how hard I am for you?”

“Want you inside,” Cas groans, voice sultry and seductive and Dean feels like he can’t take it anymore.

Everything is tight and hot, his balls fucking quivering and his dick aching to relieve the pressure and wants to do it by squeezing tight, tight. Tight in a way only Cas’ ass can be.

“Fucking hell,” he grunts, stunned by how goddamn aroused he is. It’s like he can taste it at the back of his throat, the very need itself manifesting inside him like a crazed beast yearning for release. “Stay still now, darlin’. Wouldn’t wanna hurt you.”

“I’m—ah—please, I want…”

“Wanna get fucked hard, hm?” Dean grins, rubbing the head of his dick against Cas’ hole, enjoying the feeling of the furled, soft skin there even through the condom.

It’s not so much to tease Cas but mostly because Dean likes the feeling, although it of course serves a dual purpose. Cas is shaking and Dean can see him fisting the sheets. Fuck yeah, he is reaching a breaking point and Dean can feel it inside himself as well. A little choked off fucking mewl from Cas is all it takes to push him into action. Never would he have thought a man could make such a sound and even less had he thought he would like to hear it.

But Cas’ desperation is so evident in his whole body and all of his sounds, the way his breathing has grown labored and how his hole twitches, and Dean can do nothing but absolutely fucking love all of this.

“I gotcha,” he says gruffly, aligning himself, one hand needlessly guiding his dick while he holds Cas’ hip with the other. “I gotcha, darlin’.”

Cas moans outright when Dean first presses inside and there’s an initial concern that he is hurting the other man, but one look at the rapture on Cas’ face and the way he pushes back, eager for more, is enough to calm Dean. He slides in slowly, enjoying each inch, breath pushed out of him when he bottoms out. Fuck that feels amazing. Cas is indeed tight, just right for Dean’s dick, squeezing all of him. And the feeling of his balls pressed against Cas’ taint is surprisingly snug, in a way that’s less cozy and more pleasurable.

Arousal licks his spine now, his desire for Cas making his whole body hot and sensitive, and he grins down at Cas’ quivering back, raking his fingers down it and feeling the responding heat in the other man.

“Feels fuckin’ incredible,” he sighs out, content. “You doing good?”

It’s a fair question because for all of Cas’ sounds, he is eerily silent now, body practically quivering beneath Dean. When he doesn’t get an answer, he thrusts abortively, more to elicit a response than for the purpose of fucking.

“Ah!”

Dean grins at the obvious pleasure in Cas’ voice, hands flexing on Cas’ hips. “Yeah, you’re good.”

“Dean, wait.”

Cas turns a little, patting Dean on his thigh, but Dean is already pulling out.

“Wait for what?” he asks, feeling a kind of calm settle over him. Sure, he is feeling good enough to want to just pound into Cas a handful of times until he comes, but there is something in this slow teasing that he can’t help but relish in. “Does it hurt?”

“No, but I—” Cas’ groan is perhaps the filthiest sound Dean has heard to date and it’s such a fucking turn-on he almost snaps.

“C’mon now, darlin’,” he almost snarls, completely taken by his arousal. He bends over Cas, placing a hand on his chest so that he can pull him up, chest to Cas’ back. “You’re the one that wanted my cock in your ass.”

Cas is definitely shaking now, his whole damn body vibrating. “Yes, but I’m—”

“You backin’ out now?” Dean moves one hand up, cupping Cas’ throat and jaw, his other hand traveling low on Cas’ stomach, close to touching his dick. “Just say the word, darlin’.”

“I—”

“Me? I’m feeling fucking fantastic inside you, though,” Dean growls in Cas’ ear, grinding his hips against Cas’ ass, dick jumping inside him.

“Oh shit,” Cas gasps, one hand grabbing Dean’s arm in a tight grip. Hearing him swear like that stalls Dean for a moment, overtaken by pleasure. “Oh shit.”

Dean’s eyes cut down Cas’ body at the exact right moment to see his dick jumping, his whole body jerking and his hole clenching around Dean’s dick when a spurt of something comes out of Cas.

“What’s this, darlin’?” Dean smirks against Cas’ neck, his whole being soaring with the pleasure that’s pumping through him. “You feeling good enough to squirt?” Dean didn’t even know men could do that, what a fucking rush. “All over the bed too. So fucking naughty.”

“Please,” Cas suddenly sobs, turning in Dean’s embrace, searching for more contact. “Fuck me.”

“Fucking hell, Cas,” Dean grunts, leaning in to lick along the side of Cas’ neck. “So fucking sexy.”

There’s really no stopping Dean after that. He moves with a single-minded purpose, hips rolling against Cas, their movements somewhat hindered by the fact that Dean absolutely refuses to let Cas go but Cas is clearly beyond caring for that. Judging by his continuous moans, he is getting whatever he seeks in this encounter.

When Dean changes his grip, ghosting his hand over perky nipples, Cas mewls cutely like that again, setting Dean’s skin on fire. There is so much he wants to say, teasing, praising, he wants to do it all but right now he can barely focus beyond the heat that’s inside him. The coil in his lower stomach, the tightness, the pleasure so sharp it threatens to cut his sanity in half.

Cas is clenching around him, sucking him in every time Dean pulls out to thrust back in, and he keeps breathing hotly against Dean’s cheek. So close, enough to kiss if Dean would just turn his head but fuck, there is something about that that holds Dean back.

It takes Cas grabbing Dean’s hand and pressing it against his hip, whining needily, for Dean to realize he won’t kiss Cas because if he does, he’ll come and he wants Cas to go first.

“Shit,” he gasps under his breath, hand moving on its own, following Cas’ silent request.

Cas’ dick is scalding hot and so hard Dean feels his own dick ache in sympathy. In this position it’s easy to stroke Cas’ dick using all the tricks Dean usually likes to do to himself but there is no pretending it’s his own dick and he doesn’t want to either.

“Dean,” Cas moans at Dean’s first touch and Dean wants to bottle up the sound and keep it forever.

His head swims, his vision blurring as he stares down at his own hand flying over Cas’ dick while he fucks Cas’ tight little hole and shit, he’ll come like this. It has been building slowly, surely, but it’s suddenly so there Dean can’t help but choke on his own pleasure, feeling raw and exposed in that moment.

And then Cas turns his head just the slightest and Dean seals their lips together. It’s perhaps the most forceful and sloppy kiss Dean has ever experienced but it’s fucking perfect. Lips pressing and tongues tangling, it’s wet and hot and it makes Cas come.

He moans into the kiss, body jerking once and then Dean can feel his dick hardening that much more and then it’s pumping out of him. His ass clenches around Dean’s own dick in time with his spurts and there’s really no fucking way Dean can resist his orgasm any longer. Overwhelmed by Cas’ heat, taste, scent, Dean empties into the condom with a grunt that Cas greedily swallows.

“Fuckin’ hell, Cas,” Dean murmurs against Cas’ lips when they eventually pull apart. Cas is sagging against him and Dean finds he loves supporting Cas, holding him like no one else can. Like no one else is allowed to.

He closes his eyes at the thought, swallowing hard.

“That,” Cas says, pausing to collect himself and then smiling at Dean. “Was amazing.”

“Yeah,” Dean says weakly, looking deeply into Cas’ eyes. They are still glued together, Dean’s hand still around Cas’ dick and his own dick still in Cas’ ass. “We have crazy chemistry, huh?”

“I’ll say,” Cas says, still smiling, and then he turns, breaking Dean out of his trance. He pulls away slowly, groaning a little when Dean slides out of him and ends up sitting on his hip.

“You okay?”

“Better than ever.”

Somehow Dean doesn’t believe him, wants to check for himself, feeling protective in a way he has never felt before.

“Hey, Cas,” he murmurs, sitting back and barely managing to resist the urge to take Cas’ hand when he looks attentively at Dean. “What say we stop all this business thing and like, uh,” fuck he feels stupid. “Date?”

Cas blinks twice. “Each other?”

Dean experiences the dual sensation of hope and crushing defeat at the same time. “Yeah like,” he huffs out a smile. “I know I said I’m straight and you said you don’t really have time for a relationship but like, I dunno,” he rubs the back of his head. “I’m starting to feel a little possessive over here. And all this fucking usually makes me hungry so maybe we could go out for dinner or somethin’ sometimes too?”

But now that he thinks about it, why would someone like Cas want to date Dean anyway? Such a stupid thing to ask. Post-nut clarity is catching up to Dean in the worst kind of way, but to his surprise Cas is smiling, looking all shy and cute in a way no grown ass man has any business looking.

“Truth be told,” he says, voice low and sweet. “I just said that thing about me not wanting a relationship because I was always dumped every time I tried because I focus too much on work. So I guess I’ve turned into a coward.”

Dean swallows. That’s not a rejection. “I understand that,” he shuffles closer on the bed. “Like, I understand you’d be hesitant. But I don’t think it’s bad that you focus on work, I do that too. I wouldn’t be too needy.”

Cas’ smile is a little self-deprecating then and Dean gets it. His words, not wholly unexpected, were crude and didn’t really convey his true feelings. He knows there’s nothing overly needy about wanting to see your partner once in a while, or to have them prioritize you over work, but he is bad at expressing himself.

“Truth be told,” Cas almost whispers, putting his hand on Dean’s chest, fingers playing over his scar. “I would love to get to know you more. To date you. But I’m scared of hurting you, or of you hurting me.”

“Because I’m straight?” Dean asks in an equally low tone, as if they are sharing secrets and maybe they are. He smiles when Cas nods. “Well you know what? I just learned about this thing called heteroflexibility and so maybe you’re it for me, Cas.”

Cas smiles too then. “Well you do touch me much more boldly than I thought you would during sex.”

Dean can’t help but smirk at that, putting a hand on Cas’ knee. “Yeah? How did you imagine me touchin’ you, darlin’?”

“I didn’t dare imagine it,” Cas says coyly, looking at Dean with suddenly hooded eyes and fuck, is he up for another round? Dean wouldn’t mind it, if he’s being honest.

“Not at all? You sure about that?”

Would be hot, is all Dean is saying. To know that Cas pleasured himself to thoughts of Dean in bed. Like Dean has done for the past couple of nights.

But Cas shakes his head. “It would have been pointless to think about,” he smiles a little crookedly. “It would only have made me sad to think about something I thought I couldn’t have.”

Dean’s chest seems to swell, all his sudden emotions ballooning inside him, threatening to spill out. He leans in, capturing Cas’ lips in a slow kiss more because he can’t stand not kissing him anymore. Cas makes a sweet little sound and leans into it.

“And now?” he whispers when they pull apart. “Do you think you can have it now?”

Cas smiles a wobbly little smile. “I wouldn’t mind you proving me wrong.”

“Guess we’re boyfriends now then,” Dean smirks. “We’ll start slow, dontcha worry.”

“How about your full name?” Cas chuckles and allows himself to be pulled down when Dean lies down. He snuggles up with his head on Dean’s shoulder just like Dean had hoped. “We don’t really know much about each other.”

“Dean Winchester,” Dean recites dutifully. “Car mechanic and volunteer firefighter. And you?”

“Castiel Novak,” Cas states as if that should mean something to Dean.

“And?” he murmurs, jostling Cas slightly. “What’s your job? Something fancy I bet, with those suits and everything.”

Or like the money Dean has yet to spend. He should give it back, or spend it on a date with Cas.

His question makes Cas look up, surprised. “Dean,” he chuckles when Dean gives him a blank look. “I’m the Novak, of the Novak Heavenly Hotels chain.”

Dean’s whole system freezes. Before his mind’s eye he sees flashes of the big NHH signs on all the hotels they have been to, accompanied with memories of Cas’ loaded wallet and the fact that he always managed to get a room without hesitance.

“Wait…” Dean’s mind is too fucking slow, goddamn. “Heavenly Hotels? The hotels that are in every town in every goddamn state?”

“Yeah,” Cas grins, snuggling in again. “Me and my older brother started this chain after business school. I’m filthy rich.”

Dean feels like he’s swimming off on an ocean of impossibleness. That’s not even a word Dean has ever used before, that’s how fucking impossible this situation is. So much that he had to spontaneously expand his fucking vocabulary.

“Are you sure you wanna date a fucking scrub like me?” he almost goddamn chokes.

“I am,” Cas states confidently, hugging Dean tightly. “Even more so now that I know you didn’t just say all the right things because you knew I’m rich.”

Dean’s stomach swoops and he grabs Cas’ chin gently, tilting his head up so that their eyes can meet.

“Hey,” he murmurs. “I’m an asshole sometimes but I wouldn’t do something like that. I meant what I said.”

“I know,” Cas mumbles, fingers dancing over Dean’s lips as he smiles at him. “I believe you.”

And Dean, in turn, believes him. If nothing else, the heated and loving kiss Cas gives him solidifies their mutual feelings.

*****

A few weeks later, Dean finds himself celebrating his birthday together with his closest family and friends, including Cas. In the few weeks, Cas has met Sammy twice and by the way Sam has reacted, Dean feels confident enough to introduce Cas to his friends. He is fucking stoked that his little brother absolutely adores Cas and even though he pretends he is grumpy, he is actually secretly happy that Cas and Sam have fun together teasing Dean about not recognizing Cas as Heavenly Hotels’ CEO when Sam immediately remembered him from some article or another.

Tonight, the three of them are all gathered in Dean’s favorite bar, occupying a booth together with Jess, Benny, Garth, and Lee. Benny and Garth are mostly interested in getting to know Cas and Dean could fucking cry with how great they are about this whole thing. Neither of them seem to have a problem with Dean dating a guy, as long as he is a good person who treats Dean nicely.

Lee, on the other hand, seems to be of a different opinion.

“I just don’t see the appeal.”

“Well you don’t have to,” Jess snarks, never having really liked Lee to begin with.

Lee grimaces at her, taking a sip of his beer. “It’s like you’re giving up, Dean,” he says instead. “No woman wanted you, huh?”

Dean sighs, pretending the jab doesn’t hurt. Truth be told, Benny is the friend he cares the most about losing in a case like this, but he had hoped all of his friends would want him happy. And granted, he and Cas have only been an official couple for a few weeks and Cas does spend a lot of time at work, like Dean was warned, but he is so fucking happy he feels fit to burst. Doesn’t that matter?

“Listen,” Cas snaps before anyone can say anything. His tone is completely different now, suddenly not the sweet little darlin’ Dean has in bed, or the jovial charmer that he is with everyone else. This is CEO Mr. Novak getting fed up and Dean would lie if he said he isn’t a little intrigued by this side of his man. “I have been sitting here listening to your shit all night and it ends here,” he stares viciously at Lee, who looks like a fucking deer in the headlights. “You can insult me all you want, but I will end you if you let your pathetic insecurities affect Dean any longer. Don’t test me.”

“End me,” Lee snorts, though he does sound a little nervous all of a sudden. “Such a gangster thing to say.”

“Do you know what money can buy?” Cas asks haughtily, looking down at Lee in a way that makes it clear Cas knows Lee’s worth. “No, I would expect not. So shut up.”

The mood around the table is pressed by now, everyone looking awkwardly at each other. Cas sighs, shaking his head. “I’m sorry. I can stand for a lot, but even I have my limits.”

To everyone’s surprise, it’s Lee who speaks up. “No,” he clears his throat, refusing to meet Cas’ icy glare. “I’m the one who’s sorry. You’re, uh, you’re right.”

“Lee,” Garth says, clearly moved, but Lee waves his hand to quiet Garth.

“It’s just that everything is changing,” he turns to address Dean more directly. “I guess what I’m saying is that I’m not really upset about you being into this dude, but more because like, well,” he shrugs. “I’ll lose my wingman.”

Oh, so Lee is more upset about Dean getting in a steady relationship than anything else. Well, that Dean can deal with.

“Lee,” he says kindly, putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Stop being such a selfish prick.” He grins when the rest of the table makes appropriately surprised sounds and Lee jerks. “I won’t stop hanging out with you, you doofus.”

“No?” Lee asks, surprisingly vulnerable.

Dean shakes his head. “Will I be spending a little less time with any of you? Sure, because I have added a new person to my inner circle, and a damn important one.” He squeezes Lee’s shoulder. “But I won’t ever leave my friends.”

“And if you think about it,” Sam says cheerily, leaning over the table. “Gay men make great wingmen.”

“That’s true,” Cas smiles at Lee, to Dean’s relief. “We won’t ever steal your girl.”

“I guess that’s true,” Lee chuckles after a stunned second. “Thanks, guys.”

“Aww, that was sweet,” Garth says, leaning his head on Benny’s shoulder in a sudden display of emotions.

“Sure was,” Benny grins, saluting Lee with his drink while Jess makes a similarly happy noise, hugging Sam’s arm.

“And if you think about it,” Cas says accommodatingly. “It’s not so strange that you would feel left out, hanging out with all these couples.”

That makes Benny and Garth splutter something about absolutely not being a couple, which makes everyone else laugh while Cas only looks confused and surprised.

And Dean thinks, looking at the people closest to him, including his fucking boyfriend, that he is damn happy he took Cas up on his first proposal, and followed his instinct to keep meeting up with Cas. Never had he thought his life would lead him to this moment but fuck, he supposes sometimes it’s a good thing to take a leap of faith.