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Oh my god they’re stuck in a cabin in the woods. AND THERE’S ONLY ONE BED!
***
Kakashi had lived a long life. Probably longer than he should’ve. He’d been cut and hurt and tortured, he’d lost friends and killed a few too—and there was that one time (only for a little while)—that he’d actually literally died.
He’d lived a long life. He’d survived a lot of bullshit. Too much bullshit. And so it made sense, he thought, that he was going to die on a bed in a cabin in the Land of Snow, wedged between the rough wooden wall at his back and the soft, shivering form of Sakura at his front.
“Why is it so c-cold?”
She shivered a little more violently as she spoke and Kakashi clenched his jaw behind his mask. They were huddled as close as they could get, pressed against each other on a sad little bed with an even sadder fire burning in the fireplace across the room—and still, everything was freezing.
“Maa, Sakura-chan,” Kakashi said. “Think warm thoughts.”
He’d sounded aloof. Or, he hoped he did. If he was going to die, at least he’d sound like himself. And then he’d be in hell, where he’d promptly be roasted for sharing a bed with his former student—and worse, for having wanted to be in this exact position for years.
Years. Too long. Ever since he’d turned thirty-eight and realized out of the blue, like some sort of twisted birthday gift, she was pretty in the mornings. And also the evenings. And also midday.
Hell, Kakashi figured, was what he deserved for this.
“Why did we decide to take a mission in the Land of Snow?”
“Dunno,” Kakashi shrugged. “You were the one who agreed to it.”
Sakura twisted her head around to glare at him. He could barely see her in the dim light of the fire, but her eyes were bright as ever. “You suggested it.”
Kakashi raised an eyebrow at her. “Naruto suggested it,” he corrected.
“Naruto suggested it and you agreed—”
“No, you agreed—”
“—whatever, it’s cold!”
Kakashi rolled his eyes. Sakura was still glaring at him, but he thought the effect was rather lessened as she continued to shiver. She could knock him across the room if she wanted, but here she was—glued to him in the middle of this stupid cabin they’d stumbled across in the middle of the night, huddled up for warmth.
At least hell would be warm, Kakashi thought mildly. It even sounded pleasant, compared to this. He’d be able to think freely about how nice it felt to have her pressed up against him.
“Sleep,” he murmured, because he couldn’t think of anything else to say. Maybe if they fell asleep, he’d wake up and discover that this stupid mission had only been a dream. Maybe he’d wake up and it would be a decade ago and she’d be in love with Sasuke again.
That would also be hell, Kakashi thought. An entirely different sort of hell than the one he was about to go to.
“Sleep,” he said again, more decisively than before. His fingers were numb with cold, stuck somewhere between Sakura’s back and his chest.
Sakura blinked at him once before she turned her head away from him. She settled down onto the threadbare pillow they shared, and he definitely— definitely —didn’t think about the way her body shifted against his as she moved.
“Sorry,” Sakura said softly, in a sleepy, shivering voice.
Kakashi huffed a laugh. He felt a vague temptation to work his fingers out from between them and wrap his arm around her. He could probably get away with it under the guise of body heat—she’d be warmer if he pulled her closer.
He forced himself to keep still.
“‘S okay. We’ve been in worse situations.”
Sakura laughed too. It was quiet and muffled, and her breath fogged in the air. “Yeah, sensei. I guess we have.”
His eyes slipped closed. He didn’t quite mean to—but his head shifted forward, just enough that his forehead rested against the back of her hair. Appropriately, her hair smelled like cherries. It was almost enough to make him laugh again.
He was pretty sure he loved her. Pretty sure. A feeling deeper than lust, and more confusing than friendship, or mentorship. And the absolute certainty— absolute certainty— that she was too good for him.
Whatever he felt would stay a feeling. Something dormant, never acted upon, never brought to daylight. It was…the right thing.
Maybe, Kakashi thought sleepily, as he shivered faintly in the cold air and breathed in the scent of her shampoo, he didn’t even need to die to go to hell. Maybe he was already there.
***
Sakura couldn’t sleep.
Sleep, Kakashi had said. Think warm thoughts.
Easy for him to say. She could feel him behind her, shivering faintly even though his body seemed to radiate warmth. His breathing was soft, regular—
He was sleeping. Sakura breathed out a sigh of relief, and relaxed slightly. Maybe it was a mistake, because she sank a little further into his body as the tension left her muscles.
“Fuck,” she whispered, and squeezed her eyes shut.
She was so, so stupid. Naruto had suggested this stupid mission and like an idiot, she’d agreed.
A solo trip with him, to the Land of Snow. A solo trip with him, and the weather had turned colder than predicted. A solo trip with him, and they’d needed to take shelter in this stupid cold cabin.
A solo trip with Kakashi, using his body heat to keep warm.
You’re fucked, her inner-voice informed her placidly. Suuuuuper duper fucked. Sakura clenched her jaw, because the voice was right. Of course it was. It only ever manifested when it had something to yell about.
She was fucked. Inarguably, irrevocably, fucked. He was going to wake up eventually—he was going to wake up eventually, and he was going to smell—
Sakura took a deep breath. She scooted forward a little, but the front of the bed was so cold that she slid right back into Kakashi’s body to keep from shivering.
She wasn’t sure when it happened. Truly, she wasn’t. She thought it had just started one day, maybe back when he’d been Hokage and she’d gone to drop off a report in his office. He’d looked the same as usual—wild hair, one eye closed out of habit instead of necessity, his robes slung messily over his shoulders, and—
She hadn’t been able to help it. She’d looked at him, and he’d suddenly been Kakashi, instead of Kakashi-sensei. She’d suddenly noticed how long his fingers were, and how they moved rather gracefully when he signed reports. She’d suddenly seen the way one errant strand of hair hung over his forehead, and itched to push it back out of the way. She’d suddenly felt flustered when she looked at him, when he’d never made her feel that way before.
Fuuuuuucked, her inner-voice chorused happily.
Sakura took another deep breath. It didn’t really help, because she only inhaled the scent of him, soft and clean.
She was pretty sure she loved him. She wasn’t sure when it had happened, or why, but she was pretty sure. Very sure, in fact. She knew what love was. She knew what it felt like. She knew what it meant when it hurt to think of him, and when it hurt not to think of him. She knew what it felt like to dream of sleeping with him and then to dream of waking up next to him in the mornings after that.
It was ironic, Sakura supposed, that that was exactly what was happening now. She would sleep next to him, and she’d wake up next to him in the morning. And then he’d smell how wet she was, and the secret would be out.
She wasn’t embarrassed about it. She’d already decided that. It was just—
“Fuck,” she whispered again.
It was just that it was him.
She convinced herself, as she lay stiffly next to him and tried desperately not to move, that she wouldn’t be able to sleep. It would be smarter not to sleep. That way she’d be ready when he woke up and the secret would be spoiled. She had a response ready and everything, perfectly planned out.
Yes, I like you. It’s okay. It’s been like this for a while, and things are fine.
She knew how to say that. She knew how to say that, and she knew how to move on afterwards. It would take a while, and it would hurt a little bit every time she looked at him—but eventually, it wouldn’t hurt anymore. She’d be able to look at him as Kakashi-sensei again instead of as Kakashi , and it would be okay.
It would be okay. She’d gone through this before, because she’d never really been able to help herself when it came to falling in love.
Still, it made her feel a little sad. It made her want to not sleep, because then the morning would come and the moment would pass. But Kakashi was warm and solid behind her, and she could feel his breath ghosting across the back of her neck every time he exhaled.
She didn’t mean to do it—but slowly, Sakura fell asleep.
***
She came to awareness slowly—gradually, like she was stepping out of a dream.
Actually, maybe—maybe it had been a dream. Maybe everything—a mission in the land of snow, and a lonely cabin deep in the icy woods—had all been a figment of her imagination.
Except, Sakura thought, it couldn’t be a figment of her imagination. The mattress she laid on was too stiff and unfamiliar for that, and she wasn’t wrapped up in the fluffy comforter that lived on her bed at home. The air around her was too hot, almost stuffy—like someone had left a fire burning all night long without blowing it out.
And there was an arm wrapped around her, curled over her chest, tucked under her ribs. There was a face pressed into her hair, breathing softly. There was a knee wedged between her legs. And there was a body behind hers—long and solid.
Even if she’d been dreaming, she would’ve known who had wrapped around her unconsciously, unintentionally, in his sleep. She’d been dreaming about him for a while now, maybe years, and so this was familiar.
So stupidly, achingly familiar.
Sakura left her eyes squeezed firmly shut, and wished her heart would slow down. It was racing, beating so furiously that she wondered if Kakashi could hear it, even in his sleep. Her breath was a little shaky and she didn’t even try to regulate that—it was a lost cause. Maybe it would be a lost cause forever, because she could feel him. All of him. She could feel his cock, the insistent press of his erection, directly against her ass.
Good morning, her inner voice said pleasantly. Gooooooood mooooooorning, very good morning, excellent morning I’d say —
Sakura exhaled sharply. She immediately wished she hadn’t—she’d moved slightly in doing so, and Kakashi shifted slightly against her, holding her more firmly against his body as if he were trying to keep her still.
Fuck, fuck fuck —
She could go back to sleep. Sakura weighed the option, because it felt like a valid one. She could go back to sleep and then maybe he would wake up and be so horrified that he’d scramble out of bed, and then she could wake up again to the much more manageable situation of Kakashi sitting by the fireplace in the cabin, probably reading a book.
Yes, that would be more manageable. Maybe. Her heart would lurch at the sight of him, but she was used to that.
Sakura didn’t fall back asleep. She couldn’t. She could only lay there, eyes closed, trying to breathe, and trying even harder to ignore the insistent, blazing heat between her thighs. And then everything got so, so much worse because Kakashi stirred behind her, sighing in his sleep and then stretching, as if he might wake soon.
Fuck, fuck —
He stiffened. The easy, warm breaths against the back of her neck turned quick, and then stopped altogether. Sakura left her eyes firmly squeezed shut, even though surely he could hear how fast her heart was racing.
“Shit,” Kakashi breathed. She felt the word fall into her hair, because he hadn’t pulled away from her yet. “You fucking idiot—”
It happened, then. That thing she’d been waiting for, inevitable and damning. He inhaled, and she knew—she knew —that he could smell what she’d kept hidden for years.
Yes, I like you. It’s okay.
Sakura practiced the words in her head again and again and again as she waited for him to jump out of bed. She was ready. She’d prepared for this. And so it was entirely bewildering when she felt him stiffen behind her again, and then slowly, gradually relax.
The easy breaths against the back of her hair resumed. His arm, which had shifted upon his waking, tightened slightly around her waist. He even snored once—the very fakest snore Sakura had ever heard in her life.
Her eyes cracked open, disbelieving and a little irritated. He was— pretending to be asleep?
Kakashi gave another horribly fake snore. Sakura rolled her eyes. Across from her, all the way on the wall opposite to the one the lone bed in the cabin rested against, she could see that their fire had burnt away, lost to ashes.
Yes, I like you. It’s okay. It’s been like this for a while, and things are fine.
She parted her lips to say it, but only a soft exhale left her. Her eyes slipped shut again. And maybe it was unintentional—or maybe not—but she sank into him a little, just the smallest amount. Enough so that his arm tightened around her again, and pulled her a bit closer to his body.
One minute passed, and then another. Sakura kept track of them, because for some reason it felt like it mattered.
He was so warm behind her. Heat seemed to roll off of him, enough to make her wonder if all the snow outside had melted. She tried not to think about how he hadn’t rolled his hips away from her, and how she could still feel the press of his erection against her ass.
“You’re awake,” Sakura whispered, so softly that she hardly heard herself.
A shiver of movement passed through Kakashi’s body. He was so close to her that Sakura felt the echo of it in her own body.
“So are you,” he breathed into her hair.
Goosebumps broke out across the back of her neck. “Should we—should we get up?”
“We do have an assignment,” Kakashi said, like he was agreeing with her.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“Okay,” Kakashi echoed.
Neither of them moved. Not an inch, not a mile. Until, slowly, Kakashi’s hand slipped out from beneath her ribs. Sakura, aching, felt the blow of the loss of it—but he didn’t pull away entirely, like she thought he would. Instead, his fingertips skimmed slowly across her hip, burning hot even through her clothes.
Sakura’s breath hitched. Kakashi’s hand froze—but then it moved again, sliding upwards until his fingers pressed lightly into her low belly.
Her own hand moved—she gripped his wrist, pressing into him with all five fingers. Beneath them, she could feel the throb of his pulse. It was heavy, just like hers.
Yes, I like you. Yes, it’s okay —
Slowly, Sakura let go of Kakashi’s wrist. He exhaled into her hair—it sounded shaky, uncentered. And then his hand was moving again, slipping beneath her shirt and upwards, over her ribs and to the soft, sensitive skin just beneath her breasts.
She hadn’t worn a bra. She hadn’t even thought about it—it would’ve been stupid to have on underneath the 14 layers of clothes she needed to be warm in the land of snow. She was especially glad of it now, as Kakashi made a sound in his throat that sounded like a groan.
His thumb inched upwards, and brushed softly over her nipple. Sakura gasped, and pressed her hips backwards into him so sharply that he groaned again. His other hand moved to touch her, grasping her hip to hold her steady.
“I—”
Sakura broke out of hold and twisted around, and suddenly found herself face-to-face with him— Kakashi —and the messy silver hair she’d come to love. His eyes were dark, foggy, and a little wild in a way that made her ache. His mask was up, firmly in place, just like always.
“Sorry,” he said immediately, and something like furious guilt cut through the fog in his eyes. “Fuck, sorry—”
“I like you,” Sakura blurted, which was not at all the script she’d been practicing. Not at all. “I’ve liked you for a while—and your stupid hair—and it’s all your fault, you’re not supposed to be Kakashi, you’re supposed to be Kakashi- sensei, and I can’t stop looking at you, and—”
Sakura’s eyes widened, horrified and a little exhilarated. Her only reprieve was that Kakashi wore an equally surprised expression—and…and that she could tell, because every inch of her body was flush with every inch of his, that he was still hard.
He blinked at her in a slow flutter of long silver lashes. Sakura’s heart twisted—she liked his eyelashes.
“Say that again,” he said, in a voice quite unlike his usual nonchalant tone. His hand gripped her hip again, tighter than before.
“I—like you,” Sakura breathed.
Kakashi stared at her. His fingers squeezed her hip, digging into her skin.
“You like me,” he repeated.
Sakura nodded slowly. Yes, I like you. It’s okay. It’ll be fine. The words echoed through her head, but she didn’t say them.
“Yeah,” she said instead, softly. “I—yeah, sensei.”
Kakashi made that sound in his throat again, and closed his eyes. “Sakura.”
It’s okay. It’ll be fine. She knew that. She’d been through something like this before, because she always loved more than she was allowed. He’d go back to being Kakashi-sensei eventually, and that would be good.
It would be good. It would.
Kakashi’s right eye opened—his left eye remained closed, even though he’d lost the sharingan years ago.
“I like you,” he said a little hoarsely. “You’re pretty all the time. It’s infuriating, I try to read and I think of you, I take missions and I think of you, I try to sleep and I think of you —”
He cut himself off with a soft shake of his head. Sakura felt something warm and steady beneath her fingertips—she’d reached forward to grip his shoulder without realizing it.
“You—”
Kakashi nodded before she could finish her sentence. Then, without even the pretext of hesitance, so casual that it could’ve been something normal and not something that she’d been waiting for him to do since she was a girl, he reached up and slid his fingers beneath his mask, and smoothly tugged it down to his neck.
“I like you,” he said again. “Sakura.”
She liked his hair. That had been the first thing that had made her look at him differently, on that day she’d gone to drop off a report in his office. His messy hair, and the way one strand of it rebelliously hung over his forehead while all the rest stuck straight up. She liked his fingers, because they looked graceful.
She liked his face now too. She liked his cheekbones, and how they were higher than she thought they’d be. She liked his lips, and how they weren’t anything like what she had expected—they looked soft, parted slightly, sensuous. She liked the shape of his nose, straight like a knife’s edge.
Really, she loved it. She’d always loved more than was allowed.
Sakura’s lips parted. Kakashi’s eyes flicked down to watch, and then flicked back up to meet her gaze.
And maybe— maybe —she was dreaming, because he tipped his head forward, and kissed her.
***
If he was going to hell, at least he’d enjoy it. And he was being practical, pragmatic even, because it felt like an inferno to kiss her—and more importantly, to have her kiss him back—so he’d be ready for the flames.
Hell, Kakashi decided, wouldn’t be so bad. If hell was his punishment for this, then to hell he’d go.
She felt so good. She kissed like he’d imagined she would—with a soft whimper and enough force to crush a man if she wanted. The scent of cherries was everywhere; it surrounded him as he slid his fingers through her hair and grabbed a handful of it, and pulled her head back so he could kiss her more deeply.
Sakura whimpered again. Kakashi shuddered at the sound, and pulled harder at her hair.
Possibly, he could drown in her. Actually, he’d quite like that.
“I’ve liked you for a while,” he muttered into her mouth, confessing his sins. He rolled onto his back and she didn’t even give him a moment before she climbed on top of him, and kissed him again. “So many meetings with you sitting there across my desk, and I couldn’t look away—”
“You couldn’t look away?” Sakura drew back from him, eyes wide. They were brighter than usual, almost electric. She looked at him skeptically, and Kakashi stared back bluntly. He slid a hand up her body and palmed her breast unabashedly.
“Yes,” he said, watching how her eyes began to fog over as he touched her.
Sakura leaned back down to him. “I thought—I thought I couldn’t look away,” she whispered into his mouth.
Kakashi bit her lower lip and grunted when she moaned. He was so hard it hurt—and worse (or…better, he supposed. Definitely better)—he could smell, beneath the cherries of her shampoo, the softer, muskier scent of her arousal.
He caught her gaze again—bright, electric green. The sight of her made something inside him ache; maybe with guilt, or maybe with longing.
He could see it in her face too, the longing. So much so that he wondered how he’d missed it before—maybe for years. He’d always admired that about her; Haruno Sakura, who was as open as he was cagey, wore her emotions on her sleeve.
He loved that about her. Really, he did.
It happened slowly, in the cabin hidden deep in the snowy woods. Kakashi kissed her again, and gripped her hips so tightly that surely she’d be bruised from it, and he didn’t think about how he’d go to hell for that too. He pulled off her clothes and made her come with his fingers between her legs and his mouth against hers, panting her pleasure.
“I want you,” she said after that, with eyes that were still bright, still electric, still wanting. Kakashi buried his head into the crook of her neck, and mumbled out something close to please hurry.
He watched her face when he slid into her—because it seemed important to him; wildly, stupidly important that he see any regret the very moment it formed. It would come, surely. Even when he was inside her. But Kakashi didn’t see the regret he’d been waiting for as he sank deep, as far as he could go. He only saw a flush spread over her cheeks, and her eyelashes flutter in satisfaction.
“Fuck,” she gasped, and he laughed roughly because he’d never heard her sound like that before. “Kakashi—”
He’d make her sound like this again. Her voice, all rough and desperate and pleased, murmuring his name. He’d make her scream it, maybe.
Definitely.
She came before he did, but it was a near thing. He’d slid his hand between her legs again, and she’d arched when his thumb brushed over her clit, and—
He loved her. Kakashi told her as much, even though he’d promised himself he wouldn’t. He whispered it in her ear as he fucked her into the threadbare, hard, frozen mattress in the cabin. And wildly enough—Sakura said it back.
Sakura, who was still too good for him, inarguably too good for him, said it back.
After, they lay much the same as they had laid in the night—curled up together, with his face pressed into her hair, and her body flush with his. It was different now, though, because she smelled like his cum and she was covered in it, sticky from it.
“Did you mean that?” Sakura said after a long, quiet moment had passed. She rolled around to face him, and Kakashi grinned a bit as her tits pressed into his chest.
“Hmm?” he asked sleepily, and pressed his face into her hair again—at the crown of her hair now, where her scent was strongest.
Her body stiffened—he felt it stiffen. “Did you mean it? When you said—that you loved me?”
Kakashi pulled away enough to peer curiously down at her. She had a little nervous crease between her brow—he touched his lips to it to smooth it over.
“Yes,” he said. “I meant it. Did you?”
“I always mean it when I tell someone I love them,” she said softly.
He touched his lips to her forehead again, because he knew that already. And kissing her must’ve been the right thing to do, because he felt the stiffness in her body slowly dissolve back into sleepy, relaxed satisfaction.
He was still going to hell, Kakashi thought. Probably. Could he, if she loved him too?
“I love you,” he murmured, even though he’d already said it. It felt right to say it again. It felt permanent that way, more solid.
Sakura’s body relaxed even further against his as she buried her face into his chest. Kakashi could feel the shape of her smile against his skin.
“I love you too,” she whispered, like she really did mean it.
***
Happy Valentine’s day everyone!! <3 some happy silliness for valentine’s day, and we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled angsty fics next week 😆