Chapter Text
HORROR HIGH
Chapter Ten
By Senashenta
The next day Cas let himself sleep in until almost eleven o’clock. He was feeling much better, true, but he wasn’t back to one hundred percent yet, and Dean was right that he needed his rest.
When he came downstairs after getting ready for the day it was almost noon, and his father gave him a surveying look as if he was making sure Cas wasn’t still ‘sick.’ Evidently, he decided that his son was alright, because he didn’t actually say anything except to ask what Cas wanted for lunch.
After lunch, Cas spent a couple of hours working on homework to finish it off, because he knew he was going to be busy that night into the next day. He listened to music on his mp3 player (Dean had yet to make him a playlist, too distracted by the whole jorogumo thing) while he worked.
Around four, his father called up to him to tell him that Dean was at the door, and Cas dropped what he was doing to hurry downstairs and pull the older boy inside, dragging him into a pleasant, warm kiss. “Hi.” He said with a smile when they parted.
Dean just smiled back at him. “Hey.”
“Boys, please close the door, we’re not trying to air condition all of Florida.” Chuck called over from the living room.
“Sorry, Chuck!” Dean called back and reached over with his free hand to swing the door closed behind himself before returning his attention to Cas. “Well, you certainly seem like you’re in a good mood.”
“Yes,” Cas agreed. He adjusted himself to slide his arms around Dean’s waist a moment later, the smile still on his face. “I’m going on a date today. It’s kind of a big first for me.”
“Was that today?” Dean laughed and slid his own arms around Cas as well. “I told you, I’ve never really been on a date either. Not a real one. Not one that mattered, anyway.” Then a fond look and he added, “this one matters.”
The two of them stood there by the door together until Chuck finally told them to just go upstairs, already, at which point they climbed the stairs and ducked into Cas’s bedroom, heading over to climb into the bed, Dean on his back and Cas tucked into his side comfortably. They didn’t talk much, instead just soaking each other in in silence, enjoying each other’s company, just the fact that they were both there. Something they were both going to miss immensely.
About an hour later, Cas patted a hand on Dean’s chest and informed him that it was time for them to leave—they had to walk to Maggie’s Diner and at this rate they wouldn’t make it before the place closed for the night. Normally he would have been fine with just staying cuddled up with Dean for the rest of the day, but today they actually had real plans.
Despite their best efforts, it still took another half an hour for them to get out the door because they got waylaid by a minor make-out session before they left the comfort of Cas’s bed. But once they did get moving, they were downstairs and out the door in five minutes flat, with just a brief pause to tell Chuck where they were headed.
The walk to Maggie’s took about an hour, but only because they got a little lost along the way. They did eventually make it there, though, and Dean seemed pleased by what he saw: cushy booths, retro décor and even an old school jukebox in the corner. Cas wasn’t particularly familiar with diners, so he just took Dean’s word that it was a good one.
They found a booth along the back wall and slid into their seats, facing each other because they couldn’t be counted on to keep their hands to themselves, and the waitress came by quickly to drop off menus and take their drink orders, returning a short time later with their drinks and to take their food orders.
Once their food arrived Dean began eating like he was starving, the same as always, while Cas just smiled into his drink at the sight.
“So how are you liking your first date, so far?” Dean asked when he took a break from his burger for a drink of his cola.
“It’s good.” Cas was mostly finished with his own burger and picking at his fries now, “it’s just nice to spend time with you, though. It’s always nice to spend time with you.”
Dean gave him a smile. “Yeah, it is.”
“You’ve been a lot of firsts for me, you know.” Cas admitted softly, “first date, yes, but also first friend at Caspar… first boyfriend. First relationship at all. First kiss. First… time.” It was no wonder that Dean meant so much to him, given how many firsts he’d had with the other boy. Cas smiled absently, eyes on the plate of fries in front of him. Then his smile widened a little and he glanced up before adding, “first monster Hunt.”
Dean frowned at him just slightly, halfway to a bite of cheeseburger. “Not funny.”
“I thought it was funny.” When Dean continued to frown at him, Cas sighed, “I guess we’re not to the point we can joke about it, yet.”
“It’s only been like a week.” Dean pointed out, this time around a bite of burger, “you’re still hurt. No joking until the hurt is gone.”
“…okay.” Cas finally agreed, and went back to eating his food, “sorry.”
“Don’t gotta apologize.” The older boy shrugged and reached across the table to snag a couple of fries off Cas’s plate. He had already finished his own. Dean’s appetite would never fail to amaze him. “And we can talk about all that other stuff, if you want.”
Cas tilted his head slightly, curiously, and asked, “why did you approach me… on that first day, in the cafeteria?”
“Because…” Dean paused with a fry halfway to his mouth and frowned slightly before giving him a frankly adorable grin; “because you were cute.”
“Dean, you’d never liked a guy before. You can’t say you took one look at me and instantly turned gay.”
“Bi.” Dean corrected, “and I’ve always been, I just… never acted on it before. Also, you looked really lost, and I knew exactly the kind of shit those assholes were going to try to pull at lunch. I couldn’t ignore that.” He shrugged, but then gave Cas a genuine smile again, “but yeah… Cas, I liked you right from the start. Why do you think I started walking you home and everything?”
“But… I kissed you, first.” Cas stated almost blankly.
Another shrug. “I would’ve made a move, you just beat me to it.”
Cas was completely blindsided by this new information. He just stared at Dean for the longest time, trying to digest everything he had just learned, while Dean continued to help himself to Cas’s not-quite-leftover fries. And he had been nervous about his crush on Dean. Worried about how the other teen would respond when he found out. And all along, Dean had been…
That was about when the waitress, blonde and pretty, approached the table again. Dean was still pilfering fries, but looked up long enough to give her a winning smile and ask, “do you guys have pie?”
“Cherry or apple, hon?” She smiled back.
Cas privately didn’t like the way she was smiling at his boyfriend but kept it to himself. He knew it was her job to be friendly. Dean just tipped his head and said, “oh, definitely cherry.”
“I can do that, sweetheart.”
Dean grinned up at her. “Thanks.”
“Stop flirting with the waitress.” Cas finally muttered with a small frown.
Dean blinked slightly and returned his attention to Cas, looking surprised, even as the waitress gave Cas a knowing little smile and told him in an almost conspiratorial whisper, “don’t worry about it, darlin’, your boyfriend here’s obviously only got eyes for you.” Then she spun around and headed off, presumably to get Dean a slice of pie.
Cas watched her leave, still frowning a bit, before looking back at Dean. “Sorry.”
But Dean was just regarding him with the utmost fondness in his eyes. He grabbed Cas’s plate and shoved it to the side, then reached across the table to take hold of one of Cas’s hands, squeezing gently. “You’re totally jealous right now.”
“I—” Cas wanted to deny it, but it was pretty obvious. He frowned some more. “Stop flirting with the waitress and I’ll stop being jealous.”
“I wasn’t! …at least not on purpose. Was I?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, well, I mean, that’s just kind of bad habit I picked up on the road.” Dean gave him an apologetic look, “I’m sorry. Don’t be mad.”
Jealousy was a new emotion for Cas. He had never been in a relationship that might require it, until now. It was strange and awkward and an uncomfortable feeling deep in his chest. He didn’t like it—but at the same time, he couldn’t exactly help it, either. “I’m not mad,” He said quietly after a brief consideration. He moved his hand in Dean’s, threading their fingers together, “just try not to do it anymore when I’m around? It makes me uncomfortable. I don’t like it.”
“I really am sorry. I won’t do it again.” Another apology. Dean squeezed his hand again. “You know you’re it for me, Cas.”
Cas glanced down, then back up with a little smile. “I know. Same.” Then a pause before; “you ate all my french fries, Dean.”
Dean laughed and grinned. “I’ll share my pie with you. And trust me when I say that’s not something I offer up lightly.”
Cas gave a soft chuckle at that. “I know about your legendary love of pie.”
“Legendary?”
“According to Sam, yes.”
“I’m not that bad.” Dean protested.
“You are.” Cas confirmed, but then allowed softly, “but I understand why.”
They continued talking, just quietly between themselves, and when the waitress brought the pie around, she winked at Cas, not Dean. Cas just blinked back at her, and she walked away laughing. Dean grinned over the entire scene before handing Cas a fork and waving for him to have the first bite—which Cas did, but then left the entire rest of the slice of pie for Dean, because he was obviously having a torrid love affair with it and Cas couldn’t bring himself to break up the party.
When they were finished with their food and Dean had paid the bill, they vacated Maggie’s and headed out into the evening air. The sun would go down in an hour or so, but for now they had the last bit of daylight to enjoy before the stars came out in full force. But either way was fine with them, really.
They wandered the streets for a while after that, just randomly, enjoying each other’s company, talking and laughing—until they realized they were completely lost and had to use the maps feature on Cas’s phone to find their way back to his street. Even having lived there for a couple of months, neither of them had any clue of the layout of the city, not really.
“I recognize this street,” Dean declared finally, after what felt like hours of walking around in circles. Not that it had been unpleasant, the entire idea had been for them to go for a walk together, like a ‘normal’ couple, and just pretend that everything wasn’t as screwed up as it actually was in reality, but they did have to get back to Cas’s place at some point.
Now they were on Lachley Street, which was only a couple of streets off of James, which crossed King, which of course was the one Cas lived on. Cas put his phone (and its’ maps) away and reached to take hold of Dean’s hand again with a hum. By now the sun had well and truly abandoned them and they were walking by the moonlight alone, not that that was a problem for either of them.
“When you leave,” Cas said after another half-block of walking in silence, “will you say goodbye?”
“What? Why would you even—” Dean cut himself off with a shake of his head and offered a smile, “of course, Cas.”
“Promise?” Cas tightened his hand in Dean’s slightly. For some reason, this felt important. The idea of Dean taking off without even seeking him out to say a final goodbye made something in his gut clench up. Was almost painful. “I don’t want you to go without saying goodbye first.”
“Cas,” Dean tugged him to a stop and pulled him in to bump their foreheads together lightly, “I promise, okay?”
Cas just looked at him for the longest time before nodding. “Okay.”
A little, gentle kiss. “Okay. Now lets’ get back to your place. It’s getting late.”
The younger boy smiled again, just a little, fond quirk of his lips, and they headed off.
--
--
When they got back to Cas’s house it was after nine o’clock and Cas just went straight inside, pulling Dean along with him. There was no standing around on the front porch exchanging little, lingering kisses until Dean finally had to leave like usual. Cas’s father was in the living room watching television and glanced over when they came in the door. He paused when he saw Dean and raised an eyebrow.
“Hello, Dean.” He was more a question than a statement.
“Hi, Chuck,” Dean greeted, not quite meeting his eyes.
Chuck turned his gaze to Cas, who just said, “we’re going upstairs,” and then followed that up by stating matter-of-factly; “Dean is staying the night.”
Chuck made a surprised noise. “Cas—”
“I’ll be eighteen in six months, Father.” Cas had already taken his shoes off and urged Dean to do the same, though Dean was hesitating because he was half expecting to get kicked out any minute now. “I’m old enough for my boyfriend to sleep over.” Then, after a pause, “besides, it’s not like we haven’t already done things. You’d be a little too late to stop us, now.”
Chuck’s eyebrows practically shot into his hairline, and he asked, half-seriously, “who are you and what have you done with Castiel?”
Cas actually smiled at that. “I’m growing up. I think it’s about time.”
There was a long, drawn-out silence, and then Chuck waved a hand and turned his attention back to the television. Cas finally got Dean to take his shoes off and they headed upstairs—only for Chuck to call out, when they were halfway up the staircase, “USE A CONDOM!” And then; “DO YOU HAVE CONDOMS? I CAN GIVE YOU SOME MORE IF YOU DON’T HAVE ANY—”
“NO!” Cas half-tripped over a step, face turning red, and called back, “we’re good, thanks!” Then he hurried the rest of the way up the stairs and hustled Dean into his room, closing the door firmly behind them before his father could say anything else. That had been embarrassing to say the least.
Safely inside his room, Cas leaned back against the closed door for a moment to catch his breath. His father had always been one to tease, but that was excessive even for him. Meanwhile, Dean just shrugged out of his jacket and tossed it over the desk chair like usual, then wandered over to the chronically-unmade bed and climbed in, settling himself amongst the pillows and blankets and patting one hand against the spot beside him, waiting for Cas to join him.
Once he wasn’t quite so red in the face, Cas pushed away from the door and headed over to crawl into the bed with Dean, settling beside him with a little pleased noise, one arm curled up so he could toy with the front of the older boy’s shirt like usual and his head pillowed on Dean’s shoulder comfortably.
“I’m sorry about my Father.” He apologized after a moment.
“Chuck is… a lot, sometimes.” Dean agreed, grinning up at the ceiling. “But he’s nice, and he obviously cares about you. I think he’s a good Dad. You’re lucky. There are a lot of people out there with way shittier parents than you have.”
Cas supposed that was true. His fingers traced little, absent circles over Dean’s chest, and he glanced up at him slightly. “You almost sound jealous.”
“Oh, don’t get me wrong. I love my Dad, and I respect the shit outta him.” Dean’s eyes flitted away from the ceiling, down to Cas, and he smiled, “but sometimes I do wish I’d had a more… normal. Childhood. That everything with Mom never happened and me n’ Sammy just got to grow up like regular kids.”
“I understand. You’ve had to go through terrible things.” Cas’s fingers paused and his hand smoothed out over Dean’s chest, “but you know, if you’d had a normal upbringing, we never would have met. Just like if I hadn’t moved around so much with my Father, same thing. So at least one good thing came out of it all, right?”
There was something fond in Dean’s eyes when he leaned in for a kiss. “Right.”
Cas echoed that fondness in the kisses that followed, deep and slow and progressively more heated until they had to break apart to catch their breaths and Dean took the opportunity to gently push Cas down onto his back and settle over him, careful of his ribs the entire time.
And that was the thing with Dean—he always took special care not to hurt Cas in any way, especially now that he was injured. He was always gentle and careful in everything they did, which was why Cas had no reservations about being in bed with him, even though he was still technically wounded. Dean would never do anything to hurt him. Dean cared about him too much for that, and Cas trusted him implicitly because of it.
Now he sank down onto his back, letting Dean come to rest comfortably overtop of him, and looped one arm around the older teen’s neck to pull him down for more kisses—because kissing Dean was warm and deliciously addictive, and he never wanted to stop once they got started.
Dean just settled with his weight resting on his forearms, holding most of his bulk off Cas’s chest, even though Cas would have been more than fine with Dean all but crushing him. The closer he got to the other boy the better, as far as he was concerned, which was pretty much why he let go of his grip on Dean’s neck and slid both his hands down to grab at Dean’s shirt, rucking it up and pulling at it until Dean finally broke off the kissing and sat up long enough to strip it off properly, tossing it to the side a second later.
Cas took a breath to just look at him, hands wandering up Dean’s abdomen to his chest and then farther until he could cup his jaw and drag him down for another kiss. “Has anyone ever told you you’re beautiful?”
A muffled chuckle against his lips. “Beautiful is for chicks, Cas.”
“I don’t think that’s true. You call me beautiful.”
“That’s different.” Dean didn’t offer any real explanation, just began trailing his lips along Cas’s jaw and Cas tilted his head to make it easier, even as Dean’s hands started pulling at his shirt. Cas pushed him back for a moment to wiggle out of it, discarding it afterward. Then he just pulled Dean back down to kiss him again.
“Are you sure we should be doing this?” One of Dean’s hands had come to rest on the bandages that still covered his ribs and concern tinged his voice.
Cas sighed and kissed him again. “Are you planning on hurting me?”
A frown against his lips. “Of course not.”
Another kiss. “Then we absolutely should be doing this.”
Because they might not have another chance, and Cas was damned if he was going to let this one slip through his fingers. As much as they talked about meeting up after Dean left Jacksonville, it couldn’t be guaranteed, and if this was all he could have of Dean he was going to take it and run.
Dean understood that, even if he didn’t say as much out loud. Instead, he just returned Cas’s kisses, propped on one elbow and the other hand sliding in between them to fumble with the button and zip on Cas’s jeans. He wasn’t getting very far one-handed, though, and finally Cas batted him away and just undid them himself, then quickly moved on to doing the same for Dean’s pants, pushing them down over his hips a moment later.
The older boy was back to kissing along is jaw and throat, nipping at the crook of his neck, and muttered, “I think we’re gonna have to get up to get the rest off.”
Cas laughed softly, just the slightest bit breathless, and pushed a hand against Dean’s chest, easing him back. “Up.”
Dean gave him a cheeky grin. “I’m already up.”
Cas rolled his eyes. “You’re horrible. Just take your clothes off before I change my mind.”
So, Dean rolled out of the bed to strip his pants and boxers off, while Cas just stayed where he was and shimmied out of his own jeans and boxers, kicking them off the end of the bed when he was done. Then he closed his eyes and slid one hand up to give his already aching cock a few cursory strokes, just to take the edge off, his head falling back, blue eyes closing over and a low groan in his throat.
When he opened his eyes again and glanced at Dean, the older boy was looking at him the way a starving dog would eye a porterhouse steak, gaze intense, absolutely riveted. Cas licked his lips and held a hand out invitingly. “Come here, Dean.”
Dean didn’t need to be told twice. He practically dove at the bed, and Cas laughed while Dean climbed over him, Cas easing his legs apart so Dean could settle between them. Cas moaned softly at the feeling of Dean’s cock pressing against his own and let his head fall back again, even as the other teen began grinding into him, all hard heat and slick precum, the drag and friction just this side of painful and all the more delicious because of it.
One hand grabbing at the sheets, Cas wrapped the other arm around Dean and dug his fingers in, kneading for a moment before dragging his fingers down to the small of his back, his head still back and Dean mouthing at his throat, muttering quiet curses under his breath in between the kisses.
After a couple of minutes of that, Cas finally slid his hand around to Dean’s hip, patting there urgently before stretching—with only the faintest of winces when the motion pulled his wounds—and fumbling in the nightstand. He pulled out the tube of lubricant and pushed Dean back, shoving it into his hand. Dean swore, but his hips stopped moving and he sat back a bit. And then—
“Where’s the condom?” Dean asked, still breathing hard and staring at the lube almost blankly.
“Dean… you already swallowed, remember? And so did I, kind of. I think we’re past that.”
“I—” He couldn’t really dispute that, but still. “Are you sure?”
Cas gave him an overly fond look, “are you having sex with anyone else?”
“Well. I mean. No. Of course not. Not for like a year, almost. And I was safe then, too. But no, you’re the only one I—” And then, again, “no, I’m not.”
“Then, I’m sure.”
“Your Dad very specifically told us to use a condom, you know. Yelled it, in fact.”
“He doesn’t need to know, does he?”
“Cas…”
“Dean.” And then a pause, and Cas tilted his head and asked, “would you rather we used one?”
“I just… I don’t want to screw things up between us, and this seems like a big deal.”
Cas regarded him fondly for a few breaths, then just stretched to reach into the beside table drawer again and pulled out a condom, holding it out for Dean to take. “Here.”
“Really?” Dean took the condom, already looking relieved.
“Yes, of course really.” Cas confirmed. It may not have made logical sense to him, but he didn’t want Dean to be uncomfortable. Cas reached to drag him into a kiss and Dean went willingly, already relaxing against him again. “I just want you to enjoy this as much as I do.”
“I will.” Dean promised with a grin, already opening the lubricant and smearing a good amount onto his fingers, condom discarded safely to the side for the time being.
He spent the next few, long minutes prepping Cas, stretching him out, first one finger, then two and finally three—and though Cas started out squirming, the same as the first time they had done this, by the second finger he was arching into it and starting to groan, and by the third he was head-back moaning. Loudly. Dean was getting better at finding his sweet spot and it showed, and he had already been good at it to begin with. Cas pulled at the blankets and panted until Dean finally decided he was ready and tugged his fingers away.
Cas actually collapsed back into the pillows with a whine, already completely debauched, cock leaking wetly against his stomach. “Dean.”
“Shit, Cas,” Dean’s voice came out low and rough, and he fumbled for the condom, ripping it open and quickly rolling it onto his own straining dick.
But as urgent as his movements started out, the instant it came to actually sliding into Cas’s body, Dean eased off, one hand petting down Cas’s injured side gently as he rolled his hips and fucked himself into the younger boy, slow and deep—and that set the pace for everything that followed.
Cas laughed breathlessly, delighted when Dean picked up a slow, hot rhythm, wrapping his arms around the older teen and sliding his hands up and down Dean’s back as Dean rocked their hips together, a kind of pleasure that crept up his spine and made his limbs feel loose and tingly, made his cock throb in time with Dean’s thrusts. When Dean lifted his head, Cas pulled him into a kiss, long and drawn-out and matching their movements.
Dean just continued rolling his hips into Cas’s, fucking into him slow and deep, so much differently than he had the first time, one arm braced against the bed next to Cas and the opposite hand up and rubbing gently up-and-down Cas’s injured side.
Cas lightly scored his nails down Dean’s sides, leaving little, white trails in their wake before resting his hands at the small of Dean’s back to feel the smooth roll of his muscles, kneading there while Dean continued moving inside him—and then buried his face in Cas’s shoulder, whispering soft little curses and oaths under his breath. Cas just turned his head to pant into Dean’s hair, his own breath coming heavy and harsh.
Everything was slow and heated and kinetic, soft touches and whispered words. It was perfect.
And they both knew what it was. It wasn’t just sex. But neither of them would say it—they couldn’t. Not now. Maybe not ever.
So, for now they just allowed themselves to get lost in each other for what felt like an eternity—until things came to their inevitable conclusion, anyway.
Cas came first, almost startlingly fast when Dean snaked a hand in between them to jerk him off in time with their movements, head thrown back and mouth working silently, come smearing between them—sticky and needing to be cleaned up—but later because Dean wasn’t there yet, so Cas hooked his legs around Dean’s hips and dragged him into a series of deep, hot kisses, rolling his own hips faster to keep the older teen moving.
It was only another minute or two before Dean was thrusting harder, and then pushing in deep and holding there, entire body taut. Cas stroked his hands along Dean’s back, then smiled to himself when Dean finally collapsed on top of him, completely boneless, and muttered into his shoulder, “you’re the actual best.”
Cas laughed breathlessly, “you probably say that to everyone you have sex with.”
But Dean lifted his head to frown down at him. “I really don’t. It’s just, that was—I mean, it was seriously—just.” And then, “it was just.”
When Dean broke off, Cas smiled up at him. “It was, yes.”
A return smile from Dean, and then the other boy dropped his head back onto Cas’s shoulder with a huff. Cas chuckled softly and brought one hand up to stroke through Dean’s sweat-damp hair, just gentle affection, enjoying Dean’s weight over him and the feeling of him breathing. After another couple minutes, though, he tugged at Dean’s hair and shifted his hips.
“Dean… you need to get out of me.”
“Don’t wanna.”
“Dean.”
Dean muffled a laugh against his neck and dropped a kiss there before easing back and pulling away finally, rolling to the side and sitting up. One hand lifted to ruffle at his own hair before he just got up and crossed the room, disappearing into the bathroom. When he came out, the condom was gone, and he had a washcloth in his hand.
Cas made a soft surprised noise but didn’t complain when Dean came back over and began cleaning him up, wiping the cooling cum away from his abdomen. It occurred to him that Dean was a considerate partner when it came to things like this. More so than he would have thought if he’d considered it when first meeting him. Now that he really knew him it didn’t seem so odd, Dean was a caring person, but back then Cas wouldn’t have pictured this.
Once he was done, Dean set the cloth to the side on the bedside table and then climbed back into bed, easing up to Cas’s side and wrapping him up in his arms once more, one hand sliding down to rest against his bandages almost absently.
“How’s your side? We didn’t pull it or anything, did we?”
“No.” Cas shook his head against Dean’s shoulder. “It feels fine. You were very gentle.”
“Well, I… of course I… I mean, what just happened was…” Dean trailed off, hedging for time, then just asked softly, “do we need to talk about this, Cas?”
Cas hesitated before shaking his head again, “not if you don’t want to.”
Dean was quiet for a while, just rubbing his hand against Cas’s side gently, and Cas allowed him time to think because this was a sensitive topic at best, and an absolutely forbidden one at worst. If he was honest with himself, he was a little afraid of what was about to happen—what might happen if they had this conversation.
“You know I care about you, Cas.” Dean said finally, speaking over Cas’s head, as if eye contact was a deadly dangerous thing, “more than I can even—” He cut himself off, then, and made a frustrated noise before burying his face in Cas’s hair. His voice was muffled when he spoke again, “probably more than anyone ever.” He admitted softly, “but I can’t—I’m not—with the way things are—”
Cas shifted around, adjusting to pull Dean into his arms instead and leaning in to press a kiss against his forehead. “I understand, Dean.” He said softly. “Really.”
“But it’s not fair to you, I—”
“You can’t help how your life is.” Cas assured him, voice quiet and a gentle smile on his face, “I promise I understand. Please don’t feel badly because of this. You already treat me like…” Trailing off, he considered before finishing, “like I’m something special. Something to be protected. It’s a novelty for me. No one has ever treated me the way you do, not even my Father. So, when I say I understand, please believe me.”
“Cas…”
The younger boy hummed and leaned their foreheads together so he could look into Dean’s eyes. “You know how I feel about you, right? I don’t have to say it, either?”
Dean looked like he wanted to break eye contact, but to his credit he didn’t. Instead, he swallowed a little before replying, “I know, yeah.”
“Then we’re okay.” Cas smiled fondly and settled back, Dean still wrapped up in his arms. They were both quiet for a little while before he spoke up again to say, “I hope we were quiet enough. I was… kind of loud. A couple of times.”
“Well, your Dad didn’t come banging on the door, so I’d say we did alright.” Dean seemed relieved by the topic change. That had been Cas’s plan all along. He gave Cas a wry little smile. “Guess we’ll find out at breakfast.”
“Mm.” Cas wasn’t looking forward to that inevitability. Sighing, he traced the fingers of one hand down Dean’s arm, just feeling out the muscles and enjoying the way they shifted under his touch. “Hey, Dean? Is it very different… having sex with me compared to a girl?”
“Cas!” Dean squawked, flushing red all the way down his neck, “that’s not—I mean—why would you even ask me that?”
Cas just blinked at him. “I’m curious. I’ve never slept with a girl, so I have nothing to compare it to, but you have. So.”
Dean buried his face Cas’s chest and muttered to himself about his clueless boyfriend for a moment but when he lifted his head again Cas was still staring at him expectantly, so he heaved a sigh and pushed up to roll onto his side and face the other boy properly.
“I…” Rubbing at his hair almost awkwardly, he cleared his throat and willed the blushing to go away with little success. “Okay. I… there’ve been… a few. Girls. And they’re all different, but… I guess they’re… softer? I don’t know if that’s the right word for it, but that’s how it seems in my mind. They’re softer and smoother, more pillowy, where your body is all hard planes and lean muscle. It’s a huge difference.”
“Oh.” Cas pondered that for a moment before asking softly, “do you prefer girls?”
“Cas,” Leaning forward, Dean bumped his forehead against Cas’s and gave him a little, conspiratorial half-smirk, “I’m gonna tell you something, alright? You. You feel amazing, every inch of you. And you take me so well, did even the first time. You’re so incredibly hot and sweet and pliant. And our bodies fit together perfectly—like you were made for me. Like we were made for each other. You turn me on like crazy and get me off like no one has before. You are hands down the best I’ve ever had. You take my breath away.” Ducking in, he gave Cas a quick kiss, then added; “so no, I don’t prefer girls. Or even other guys, not that there’ve been any. I just prefer you. So, you’d better get used to meeting up with me in cheap motels because I’m not letting you go any time soon.”
By the time he was finished, Cas was looking positively dumbfounded, just staring with wide eyes—until a flush of red began to creep across his face and down his neck all the way to his chest. Dean counted making Cas blush as a win. “I didn’t… realize. I knew today was… but…” Cas’s blue eyes glanced sideways before flicking back to Dean again. He swallowed and licked his lips. “So… after the first time, when I told you I saw stars? I wasn’t—being figurative. Things were so intense, and you were so amazing and perfect and my vision just—blacked out for a minute, near the end, and I saw literal stars.” He swallowed again and brought one hand up to touch at Dean’s chest, fingers dragging there lightly. “I’m glad you don’t prefer anyone else because I—don’t—want to share you, Dean. You know that. Not when you can make me feel like that. Like you always do. Like I feel now.”
“Not when we fit so well together.” Dean agreed softly.
This harkened back to their earlier conversation but felt easier somehow.
“It’s selfish of me, though.” Cas murmured, pressing his hand flat against Dean’s chest to feel his heartbeat under his palm. “It seems like the whole world could use some Dean Winchester, and I just want to keep you all for myself.”
But Dean shook his head at that. “It’s not selfish. I feel the same way about you.”
“But what use am I, really, other than wielding a fire extinguisher on the odd occasion?” Cas countered with a smile and one of Dean’s hands lifted, up and around to smooth over the bandaged gashes on Cas’s ribs again almost absently; “you’re out saving the world almost every day. I’m nobody special.”
“You are special, I’ve told you that before.” Green eyes peered into blue—and then Dean sighed and shuffled around to pull Cas back into his arms again. Cas went willingly, accepting the trade-off and settling against his chest with a hum. “Just because you’re not a Hunter doesn’t mean you’re not special. To me you’re the most precious thing in the world. And I can tell you’re gonna do great things, Cas. Important things. I can feel it, deep down inside myself. You could be President some day.”
Cas laughed at that suggestion. “I seriously doubt that but thank you.”
Dean grinned at him. “You know what I mean, though.”
“Yes, I know what you mean.”
The rest of the night was spent just spending time together, each one basking in the other one’s light, talking about whatever came to mind, making out—and yes, having sex twice more during the long hours they were passing. When they finally did go to sleep, the sun was just cresting the horizon and they were tangled up in each other’s arms, warm and comfortable and pretending, at least for the time being, that things were going to stay that way.
--
--
When Cas woke up later that day, the clock on the nightstand read two twenty-three p.m. and Dean’s breath was soft on the back of his neck, the other boy’s arm slung over his waist, heavy and warm. Cas closed his eyes again, then rolled over to cuddle into Dean’s chest, humming a contented sound to himself. He could get used to this.
And the same as last time, he hadn’t had any nightmares, with Dean beside him in the bed. Dean really was like his own personal dreamcatcher, only far more effective. Cas was just idly considering that idea when Dean began to move, shuffling slightly and then tightening his arm around him.
Cas pressed a kiss by his collar bone gently. “Good morning.”
“Mm. ’Morning.” Dean still sounded half-asleep, but he still adjusted to hold Cas against his chest, “how’d you sleep?”
“Good. The same as last time you slept over. What about you?”
“I could use a couple more hours. Last night was intense.”
“It was.” Cas agreed and looked up at him to study his expression. “But good, too, I hope.”
Dean chuckled, low in his chest. “So good, Cas. The best.”
Cas brightened considerably at that. “Great, so then you can’t be angry with me when I tell you that we have to get up.”
A long groan and Dean flopped his head on the pillow. “Why?”
“My Father,” The younger teen explained, “is probably waiting for us to make an appearance downstairs at some point today, and it’s already two-thirty.”
“Your Dad…” Dean stared at him, then swallowed hard, “I have to face your Dad after last night? After what we did last night? I mean it was amazing and everything but…” Then; “what if I just sneak out your window, instead?”
Cas smacked his arm. “No.”
“Cas.”
“My Father likes you,” Cas pointed out, even as he began to untangle himself from Dean and sit up. “And he knows we’re sleeping together, obviously. If he’d had a problem with it, he would have kicked you out last night when I told him you were staying over. He won’t do anything.” Then a pause and he amended, “I take that back, he will probably tease us. A lot. But that’s just how he is. I’m used to it.”
“I’m not.” Dean grumbled, but sat up anyway, stretching and running a hand through his hair. He wasn’t always good at dealing with the parents of his conquests after the conquesting. He usually cut and ran before there could be any confrontations. Not that Cas was a conquest by any means, which made going downstairs and actually talking to Chuck after he had spent an entire night debauching his son an important thing to do. Awkward, but important.
Cas leaned over to give him a brief kiss. “We’re showering first.”
“’We’re’?”
“Mm, you’re coming with me.”
“Cas, you know what happens when we shower together.”
“I know.” Cas shuffled over to the edge of the bed and climbed to his feet, glancing back over his shoulder at Dean. “Are you coming?”
Dean didn’t really need to think about his decision too hard, not with Cas standing there completely naked, asking him to join him in the shower. That seemed like an easy one. Like, so easy it could be a trap of some kind. In the end Dean decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth and just got up to follow Cas into the bathroom.
When they emerged from the bathroom almost forty-five minutes later, Cas had a little, almost smug, self-satisfied look on his face and Dean’s knees felt wobbly, but they were otherwise clean at the very least, and Cas had fresh bandages on. They got dressed quickly after that, paused by the door for Dean to drag Cas into a series of long, deep, grateful kisses—and then headed out into the hallway and down the stairs to the main living area.
Chuck was standing in the kitchen, leaning against the island, his glasses on and reading the paper, a cup of coffee sitting by his elbow. He didn’t even spare a glance up when they approached and Cas started rattling around in the cupboard for coffee cups, checking to make sure the pot was full, and pouring a couple of mugs for himself and Dean. He added cream and sugar to his, though of course just handed Dean a cup of black coffee. Dean uttered a soft ‘thank you’ and gave him a smile.
“I was beginning to think you’d died.” Chuck drawled finally without looking up from his paper, “I wouldn’t be surprised, considering the goings on last night.”
“Hello, Father.” Cas replied, pulling out the bread and dropping two slices into the toaster. “How are you, today?”
“I would be better if I’d had earplugs last night, who could sleep with the racket you two were making?”
Cas sighed. “Father.” While Dean muttered, “we weren’t that loud.”
Chuck finally looked up from his reading, reaching to pick up his coffee and take a drink, and eyed the two of them for a long moment before deadpanning; “it was six o’clock this morning when you two finally quit it. Did you run out of condoms? I thought you’d never go to sleep.”
Another long-suffering sigh from Cas. The toast popped and he buttered it, then added jam and passed a slice to Dean, who was doing his absolute best not to look Chuck in the eye. “We weren’t that bad, and you know it. Also, I happen to know that you do own earplugs.”
“And sound-cancelling headphones,” Chuck broke into a huge grin, “they came in handy!”
“Father,” Cas protested around a bite of toast.
“Hey, no, real talk here, Cas,” Chuck set his mug down again and looked between the two of them, “I’m glad you seem so happy. I’m glad you found each other, as it were. I can overlook the underage porn happening under my own roof, just—Dean?” And when Dean’s eyes finally flicked up to meet his, Chuck gave him a serious look; “don’t you dare break my son’s heart. I will bring the almighty wrath of God down on you, I swear it.”
Dean had been chewing a bite of toast, but swallowed it quickly, eyes widening. “I—” He swallowed thickly, glancing at Cas and then down before back up at Chuck again, expression serious and voice firm; “I told you before, and I meant it. I would never knowingly hurt Cas. I care about him too much for that.”
A little, fond smile quirked at Cas’s lips, and he hid it behind the lip of his coffee mug. “I trust him.” He told his father softly, “you should, too.”
Chuck grumbled something under his breath before accusing, “you two are making it really hard to be the stern Dad, here.”
“Sorry.” Cas shrugged.
“You are not.” Chuck adjusted his glasses and went back to his reading. “Leave my presence now, your puppy love sickens me.”
Cas’s expression shifted to something unreadable for a moment because… this wasn’t puppy love, what was happening between him and Dean. They had established that the night before, even though neither of them had said the actual words. But his father had just reminded him that it was there, always there, and would still be there after Dean left. And it would be hard. So hard. To say goodbye to him. (Even with the promise of visits and video chats.)
Blinking back to reality, Cas took a sip of his coffee, watching Dean from the corner of his eye. The older boy seemed a bit more relaxed now, drinking his own coffee and finishing off his piece of toast—not much of a breakfast but better than nothing—while the three of them just kind of… existed. In surprisingly comfortable silence, all things considered.
After a moment, Cas transferred his coffee from one hand to the other and dropped his now-free hand to take hold of Dean’s, squeezing gently. “What do you want to do today?”
“Something that isn’t sex?” Chuck piped up, and Cas next thing to glared in his direction.
Dean coughed out a laugh. “We could go somewhere. We have a few hours before I told Sam I’d be back.” Then he paused just long enough to thread their fingers together before adding, “or we could just hang out here. Maybe watch a movie or something?”
Cas set his half-empty mug on the counter and smiled at his boyfriend. “I think we should stay in.”
Because Dean would be leaving any day now, and Cas wanted as much quality time with him as he could get, even if it was just cuddling up on the couch and watching Netflix while his father teased them about it. Going out on another date would be nice, but it wasn’t… private enough. He wanted Dean all to himself. He always wanted Dean all to himself. (And he knew in the end that his father would only tease them a little and then disappear into his study, anyway.)
“Pizza and Netflix it is, then.” Dean agreed.
“Pizza?” Cas blinked. No one had said anything about pizza.
“Definitely pizza.” Dean confirmed, “I mean that was some good toast, I’m not knocking the toast, but I am starving.”
“You used up a lot of energy last night,” Cas reasoned with a quirk of his lips, then; “we can order pizza if you want.”
Dean at least had the presence of mind to be embarrassed over Cas’s comment, glancing at Chuck, who was steadfastly ignoring them now. Leaning in close to Cas he whispered, “and this morning, thanks to you.” Cas tried not to look smug and failed rather spectacularly. Dean just grinned and offered, “I’ll pay for the pizza.”
With a fake credit card, Cas knew, the same as always. “Of course.”
So, they ordered pizza, and while they were waiting for it to arrive, they browsed through Netflix to find a movie to watch, though if he was honest Cas really didn’t mind what was on the television as long as they were together. He would probably be paying more attention to Dean, anyway.
Eventually they settled on an old thriller that Dean had seen before—though to be fair, Cas thought Dean had seen all the movies before. In any case, Dean swore uphill and down that it was a classic and that Cas would love it. Cas was skeptical. He wasn’t really into movies, not the way his boyfriend was. They had already established that he was more of a book person. Hence the disused television in his bedroom.
Once the pizza arrived and they had both eaten their fill—and shared with Chuck, who ate and then disappeared into his study as Cas had privately predicted—they settled in the living room to watch their movie. Dean was leaning into the corner of the couch with Cas tucked into his side and everything was warm and comfortable again immediately.
And Cas was right, the movie didn’t interest him. Dean seemed to be enjoying it, but half an hour in Cas was far more interested in the other teen than he was the film playing out in front of them.
He tilted his head and started pressing kisses along the curve of Dean’s neck, just little and light, eyes closed as he nuzzled into Dean’s throat with a sigh. After a moment Dean made a soft sound that rumbled in his chest and turned his head—and the next kiss that Cas dropped was met by lips instead of soft skin.
“Mm.” Cas smiled into the kiss, and when Dean pulled back again, he offered, “sorry. I’m really not interested in movies.”
“I know. It’s just an excuse to cuddle up with you, really.”
Cas laughed, already shuffling them around so Dean was sprawled out on his back, and he could settle over him. He crossed his arms over Dean’s chest and leaned his chin down on them, smiling up at the older boy for a long moment. “Where do you think you’ll go?” He asked softly, “when you leave here.”
Dean hummed and brought one hand up to card his fingers through Cas’s hair, the other resting against his side gently. “There’s no way to know. Wherever we’re needed, I guess. Wherever Dad decides to take us.”
“And you’ll help out on the Hunts, now that you’ve done one of your own?”
“Hard to say.” Dean hedged, “Dad is pretty pissed at me right now. He might bench me because of all…” He waved a hand between himself and Cas before returning it to Cas’s side, his other hand still toying with Cas’s hair; “this. I broke all the rules on my very first solo Hunt.”
Cas leaned into the touches in his hair, eyes closing over, “I’m sorry. You’re in trouble because of me.”
But Dean just shook his head, smiling down at him, expression soft. “You’re worth it, Cas.”
“Worth defying your Dad for?”
“Definitely. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”
Blue eyes opened and Cas looked up at Dean—then pushed up to kiss him. “I adore you.”
Dean smiled against his lips and managed, “I know. I… I mean. You know. Same.”
That was the best he was going to get, but it was good enough for Cas. He understood how Dean felt, just like Dean understood how he felt. They just weren’t actually saying it. Because saying it made it too real, saying it… you couldn’t take that back, once it was out in the world. Even telling Dean that he adored him was pushing the boundaries a little.
Maybe some day they could say what they actually meant, but not today.
In any case, for now Cas just settled over Dean again, resting comfortably with his head tucked under Dean’s chin, and they spent the rest of the day—until Dean had to head back to the motel—with various Excuse Movies playing in the background while they generally ignored them, spending the time wrapped up in each other instead.
At seven, when Dean reluctantly announced that he had to leave, Cas grumbled but allowed it, untangling himself from the other teen and climbing off the couch, then reaching a hand out to help haul Dean up, too.
They possibly spent too long saying goodbye, standing at the front door exchanging little kisses until Dean finally wrenched himself away and disappeared into the night for the long walk back to the motel where his brother was waiting.
Cas turned off Netflix, after that, and went up to his bedroom to tidy things up from the night before.
--
--
The next day was Monday, which of course meant school for Cas, if not for Dean, but after the events of Friday, spending time with the friends he already had and making new ones, he wasn’t actually dreading walking up the steps to Caspar High the way he had before. He knew he wasn’t alone, even if Dean wasn’t there anymore.
Charlie, Jody and Garth met him by his locker like they had on Friday, but this time Jo and Kevin joined them, and Cas chatted with them for the short time before the first bell rang to send them off to class: for Cas it was geography.
His morning classes went by smoothly enough, though there were the occasional whispers behind his back. It happened in every class except calculus, as if Charlie warded the negativity off. He sometimes wondered why Charlie didn’t get the same treatment, considering she was just as gay and out as he was. Maybe it was more socially acceptable to be a lesbian? Who really knew.
In any case, lunch hour was spent at the Weird Kid table in the cafeteria. This time Cas had remembered to only pack one sandwich—not an extra one for Dean. It was a kind of bittersweet moment to open his bag and find just one lunch inside instead of two. Cas shook it off and settled in to eat anyway.
Right after lunch was his beloved calculus class. Beloved not because he liked calculus all that much, but because it was the only class he shared with his friends. He made himself comfortable in his seat behind Charlie and beside Garth, diagonal from Jody, and pulled his books out.
The four of them talked amongst themselves until the teacher arrived, at which point they buckled down for math.
But only ten minutes into class, Cas’s cell phone beeped from his bag—and he stealthily picked it up to check the message. It was from Sam:
[We’re leaving. NOW. He’s cleaning out his locker. If you run, you can catch him.]
Cas dropped his cell back in his bag and scrambled for the door, ignoring the teacher calling after him and Charlie shouting “what the hell, Cas!”
Dean’s locker had been in the science hall, which was all the way in the other end of the building. By the time Cas got there it was a ghost town, Dean was gone. So, Cas did the only thing he could think of—he sprinted for the front of the school, hoping to head Dean off at the pass. Because he could handle Dean leaving, he had come to terms with that, but not without saying goodbye. They had agreed to that.
When he got to the lobby it was empty, but Dean was outside, making his way down the steps in front of the school.
“Dean!”
Dean was just about to get into the idling Impala when Cas burst through the front doors of the school, frantically calling his name. He immediately turned around and hurried over—the two of them collided halfway between the building and the car, Dean grabbing Cas by the collar and pulling him into a desperate kiss. Cas returned it in kind, not stopping even when a car horn honked and an angry voice called after Dean.
When they broke apart there were tears in Cas’s eyes and he brought his hands up to rest against Dean’s chest, fingers hooking in the fabric of his shirt, tugging gently. “You promised you’d say goodbye.”
Dean shook his head, then winced when the horn honked again and Sam’s voice could be heard demanding just give him a minute, Dad! “I’m sorry—just—my Dad, and you were in class—there was no time—”
Cas smiled sadly. He understood. His hands slid up to cradle Dean’s face, thumbs brushing over the scratchy stubble of his jaw; “listen to me, this is important: You are a good person, Dean, no matter what other people might say, no matter what your Dad might say, no matter what you might think of yourself sometimes. You’re good, and kind, and generous, and so, so caring. You’re the most caring person I know. I’m better for having known you. And you are destined for great things, world-changing things, even if I’m not there to see them. Remember that there’s always someone out there rooting for you and remember that being a Hunter doesn’t have to define you.” Then a small, sad laugh, and; “and remember that texting and video chats are a thing.” Cas was still smiling, but now tears were streaming down his face. He took a shaky breath before continuing; “and know that I love you, Dean Winchester. I love you.”
Dean sucked in a sharp breath, then let it out, shuddering, and pulled the other boy close again, closing the distance to kiss him once more. “Cas, you know I—I—”
“I know.” Cas murmured against his lips, “you’re not ready. You may never be ready. But I had to say it.” Stepping back a bit, he wiped at his eyes and looked toward the car; “you should go. Sam and your Dad are waiting.”
Dean shook his head, mouth working but no sound coming out for a long moment. Then he reached out to take hold of Cas’s hand and squeezed firmly before letting go and turning around, heading over to the Impala and climbing in. The car door closed with finality and Cas blinked back more tears as it pulled out—
—only to almost immediately screech to a stop again just a few feet later. Muffled, raised voices sounded from inside the vehicle for a moment before the passenger door flung open once more and Dean clambered out again, striding purposefully back over to where Cas was standing, giving him a completely baffled look. “Dean, what—?”
Grabbing hold of him, Dean dragged him into another kiss, then pressed their foreheads together and offered up a breathless grin; “I am ready. And I love you, too, Cas. I do. I think ever since I met you.” Dean’s smile was bright and happy; “I couldn’t leave without telling you. I never would’ve forgiven myself.”
Blue eyes blinked, shocked, but then a wide, delighted smile stretched across Cas’s face, too. The kind of smile he didn’t offer up very often. Dean soaked it in like the rays of the sun, and they stood there like that for the longest few moments before his dad honked the car horn again, bringing them back to reality. Dean lifted a hand to stroke through Cas’s hair gently and Cas leaned in for another kiss—and this time when they said goodbye it wasn’t sad or heartbreaking, it was only tinged with the slightest bit of melancholy and brimming with the hope and joy that newfound love brings to everything it touches.
When Cas got back to class a short time later, there was already a new text on his phone:
[Butte, Montana. Werewolf. Yes, they’re a thing. I love you.]
Cas smiled down at the screen and quickly typed out a reply, the teacher glaring at him the entire time:
[Be safe. I love you, too.]
--
--
Chuck finished typing his latest page and printed it out, then plucked it from the printer and held it up with a satisfied grin on his face. “I knew I should have introduced them earlier. High School AUs are in this season!”
THE END