Chapter Text
“How did we get in this situation…?” Said every human Marinette in the large bedroom that Ironbug Nanobug had created, the teens laying around either on the floor in sleeping bags (Spots, Hopper and Leo) or on beds (Dupain-Cheng and Lucky).
All the various versions of Marinette (Dupain-Cheng, Spots and Lucky, Hopper, Nanobug and Leo) were in a shared bedroom, designed to fit them all.
“This can help us better understand each other. After all we are the same individual, just with different experiences.”
“Of course you think so Ironbug…” Muttered Marinette.
“I-It’s Nanobug!”
“No… I think I like Ironbug now!” Added Spots.
“Er… Girls?” Asked Lucky.
“G-Girls, let’s not be mean to each other…” Spoke Hopper.
“Oh but that’s the fun part isn’t it about being by yourself isn’t it! I’ve been mean to myself ever since I realized I am twice responsible for having this piece of shit cane! Once because I decided to play hero and save that dumbass Chloe and the other because the other version of me literally broke my leg!”
“Girls!” Spoke up Lucky again.
“’Dumbass’?! Chloe is our friend! Sure she’s mean and demanding, but she’s got a good heart and she’s misunderstood!” Exclaimed Leo.
“C-Chloe is not our friend! She’s belittled me ever since we were little and she’s been horrible to everyone, using her daddy’s name to get whatever she wants! Once she prank called the fire department and the whole school had to do cleanup! And all because she didn’t want to do some baking!” Replied Hopper.
“You call that mean?! Betterfly made a Kamiko out of that bitch and SHE HOSPITALISED MY DAD!”
“EVERYONE SHUUUUUUT UUUUUUUP!” Shouted Lucky, getting everyone’s attention. “I understand that we, being who we are, do not hold the nicest opinion about ourselves. I also understand than being heroes also meant that our self esteem, while developed, didn’t do so properly, or healthily. I also know that our experiences meant we have tried to treat everyone with kindness whenever possible— so— knowing this… CAN WE JUST PRETEND WE ARE DIFFERENT PEOPLE AND ACT KINDLY INSTEAD OF DRIVING EACH OTHER CRAZY LIKE WE DO WHEN WE’RE ALONE?!”
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“So how much bakery are you all into…? I usually help out my mama, papa and sometimes grandpa with baking and stuff since I don’t have any friends…” Asked Spots, surprising everyone with the tragic yet wholesome confession, the girl’s cheeks a bit red with embarrassment.
“Mels enjoys it more than me honestly. Too much standing up… but I do like helping my parents from time to time, mostly when they have big orders.” Revealed Marinette.
“My parents were not bakers. My mother did enjoy it as a hobby though. She used to say that it was the fun side of chemistry.” Said Ironbug.
“My parents are bakers, though I don’t do much baking myself. Not very good at it either.” Revealed Leo nonchalantly.
“I do it… but it’s kind of difficult since… you know.” Hopper waved her hand over her unseeing eyes.
“Oi, what did I say about putting ourselves down.” Grumbled Lucky. “It may be difficult and you may not be able to continue after our parents retire, but you can still do it as a hobby. And you can probably do other stuff!”
“Oi, oi— don’t try to get out of answering! Give us your response.” Ordered Spots.
“Uh… I’m a bit embarrassed to admit I’ve barely done any really… Being Ladybug has been exhausting, even though it’s gotten better after I beat Hawkmoth.”
“You beat Hawkmoth?! Who was it?” Asked Hopper.
“I don’t know if—“
“Gabriel Agreste. He got the Miraculouses when he went with his wife to Tibet, no?” Asked Dupain-Cheng.
“How did you…?” Asked Lucky.
“Same thing with my boss. Except he got the Cat instead. Oh and he wasn’t evil.”
“Gabriel Agreste was your boss?” Asked Leo.
“Yup! I was assistant fashion designer.”
“Oh you girls are fashion designers?” Asked Hopper.
“Not me.”/ “Not me.”/ “Not me.” Said Ironbug, Lucky and Leo at the same time.
“Okay I can kinda understand you two, I think...” Marinette nodded to the robotic heroine and Leo morpher holder. “… but what happened to you?”
“Well technically I used to be… Not anymore though. Just don’t have the motivation for it after… some events.”
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“Fucking hell we are so pathetic…! We can’t even have some nice sleepover talk without finding a way to insert shitty drama…!” Weakly exclaimed Spots.
“Ooh! Why don’t we talk about boys! I read in a book that’s what happens at a sleepover!” Exclaimed Ironbug, everyone else turning to her. Even Hopper sits up to ‘look’ at her.
“Is that not a real thing…?”
“It is…” Began Spots.
“It’s just that you made it sound like it’s just a… story?” Finished Hopper.
“Well to me it is.” Explained Ironbug.
“… And I thought my word was shitty!” Exclaimed Spots.
“We’re having a girl talk!” Exclaimed Marinette.
“Wooo!”
“… and he’s just so charming and gentlemanly and cool and ARGH DRAKE IS SO AWESOOOOOOOOOOOME!” Yelled Hopper.
“You really… really like your partner.” Commented Spots after twenty full minutes of Hopper gushing after Weather.
“But isn’t that how he behaves when he’s transformed? Like an act he puts on?” Asked Marinette.
“I thought about it… But now that I know who he is I remember all those little moments where he’s exactly the same without the mask and which were so obvious in retrospect—”
“Okay my turn!” Cut in Lucky, preventing another gushing session. “<Clears throat> I had a little crush on Adrien, but he… well has anyone ever dealt with one Lila Rossi?”
“Humiliated her. Girly thought she could lie and get away with it.”
“… Right. Well she did mostly succeed in doing that to me.”
“Wait, you had Chloe and this Lila person on your back?” Asked Spots.
“Well Chloe had stopped succeeding in bullying me since I became Ladybug and… befriended Alya— Nope! No drama! Let me get back to what I was saying—! So this Lila person lied a lot. She mostly ruined my reputation with the class and Adrien, who I liked, decided he wasn’t going to get involved. He was too busy ‘keeping the peace’.”
“Shitty doormat tactics…” Muttered Marinette.
“Kinda. He did it because he was Chat Noir and he didn’t want anymore Akumas… or I hope that’s his reasoning—”
“Okay… but what does that have to do with your girlfriend?” Asked Ironbug, hoping to steer the discussion back into the intended direction.
“Well Kagami… her and I met a while earlier, when I tried out for the fencing team? We became sort of rivals but after Adrien started playing peacemaker—”
“—Doormat—” Cut in Spots.
“— she kinda lost her interest in him. I had at that point relegated a huge chunk of my time to Ladybug duty since that was the only time when I felt like people actually liked me— but then Chat started being much more pushy than usual, which was obviously because he was doing the same thing I was trying to do as Ladybug— except he was being inappropriate about it— and so I ended up fencing with Kagami. Kagami… she was the only person willing to cut through all the angst going on and speaking with me honestly, being supportive. And she was doing the same thing with Ladybug! She wasn’t looking at the heroine that was saving Paris, placed upon a pedestal, but as a person that happened to have a big heart and helped out! It was so… so wonderful! Plus she’s really pretty so how could I not, you know~?” Finished Lucky with a fears, realizing that perhaps this was a bad idea. Anyone could tell Tempest this stuff and embarrass her. Marinette’s made embarrassing oneself an elite sport, after all.
“Doesn’t sound too different from my experience… Except, obviously my pain was self imposed. Chloe and I dated—”
“What?!” Asked Hopper and Spots.
“— oh shush. The Chloe from my world wasn’t that bad—”
“—Team Good Chloe for the win—!” Whooped Leo.
“—Yeah basically. Anyway I saved her from…”
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“Did something happen?” Asked Hopper, wondering why Marinette stopped talking. Lucky turned to the girl, only to her look at the ceiling pale-face.
“I-I am t-three t-times responsible f-for this f-fucking leg…!” Muttered Marinette unevenly, with a broken smile upon her face.
“Why?” Asked Leo.
“The event that caused me to have my leg broken was me saving Chloe from an attack… conducted by Chai. A villain that was positioned at an earlier point in the timeline than he should have been at… meaning we need to fucking go back into my timeline and have the attack happen so my leg gets fucked…” Marinette pulled the pillow from under her head and screamed bloody murder into it for what felt like five minutes.
“Are you alright? Are you in need of more medicine?” Asked Ironbug as Marinette, after falling silent, pulled out her pill bottle and downed the last Vicodin in it.
“I’m fine… Anyway~! After I had my leg bones practically smashed to pieces I decided to cut off my relationship with Chloe and cut myself off from the world— I was a pretty sporty person, having learned both fencing and martial arts, part of it being out of a desire to protect Noo— Anyway~!” That ‘anyway’ sounded even more forced than the other one. “Mels was the only person that didn’t make me feel like shit. She was so… understanding. She didn’t pity me. She didn’t offer me help when I didn’t want it even though she always wanted to help. Most importantly her reserved demeanor turned into this, frankly, cool determination to be by my side. She won me over completely and utterly when she confessed. I mean if somebody loves you at your worst, then that person is a saint— not saying that you should be the worst, but you girls get what I’m saying, right?” Asked Marinette awkwardly.
“Yep.”/ “Completely.”/ “Don’t even get me started…”/ “Yeah.”/ “Yes!” Agreed Leo, Ironbug, Spots, Hopper and Lucky.
“… I don’t have anyone that I like actually. I used to life Adrien, but he was really… boring? He wasn’t much for conversation. Felt like he was suppressing himself. It was kinda sad and I honestly didn’t have the will to try and ‘fix’ him, you know?” Admitted Leo after a while.
“We’re not fictional characters, so I get your struggle.” Replied Marinette.
“So who’s left?” Asked Ironbug as she looked over to Spots.
“My Adrien’s an ass… But a nice ass~” All the Marinette’s laughed at that along with Spots. “ In all serious though, the two of us spent most of our time taking our frustrations out on each other, but after learning who we were, we started to kinda… mesh? We’re both lonely and while Adrien is literally isolated by being homeschooled I was isolated at school, so it’s basically the same thing. He’s also got a goofy side to him, which I like.”
“So we had our girl talk. What’s next Ironbug?” Asked.
“Eh? You’re asking me? Also it’s Nanobug! Nanobug!”
“Well you were the one to have us do this. I guess it’s a nice bonding experience, but I can’t say that I don’t feel weird talking to what is basically myself.” Pointed out Leo.
“Oh… I see. Hm… How about…?”
“ ♪ Miraculous! Simply the best! ♪
♪ Up to the test, ♪
♪ When things go wrong! ♪
♪ Miraculous the strongest around! ♪
♪ They are more than earthboooooound~! ♪
♪ The illustrious leader, Drake! ♪
♪ As fast as air, ♪
♪ Master of gale! ♪
♪ Just like water: he's untrappable ♪
♪ Indestructible! ♪
♪ And like lightning, he's powerful ♪
♪ And he'll be successful! ♪
♪ Miraculous! Simply the best! ♪
♪ Up to the test, ♪
♪ When things go wrong! ♪
♪ Miraculous the strongest around! ♪
♪ They are more than earthbound! ♪
♪ And with Epona by his side, ♪
♪ Unshakeable aid to provide ♪
♪ With her portals Paris needs no guide, ♪
♪ To safety they will gallop ♪
♪ The city, him and his lady! ♪
♪ Miraculous! Simply the best! ♪
♪ Up to the test, ♪
♪ When things go wrong! ♪
♪ Miraculous the strongest around! ♪
♪ They are more than earthbound! ♪
♪ Ooooh, the Akumas they will break! ♪
♪ One day Hawkmoth they'll overtake! ♪
♪ And this conflict will reach its daybreak! ♪
♪ They will bring back peace! ♪
♪ And this conflict they will ceaaaaaaaase~! ♪ ”
“WOOOOOOO!”/ “<Whistling>”/ “<Applause>” Everyone cheered as Hopper finished her song, the girl blushing.
“See I told you there is something you are good at!” Exclaimed Lucky.
“It’s n-not y-yet finished t-though! T-The measure isn’t q-quite right…” Replied Hopper bashfully.
“Well I’m not good at singing, but I do play violin. I think it’s okay for someone with, what I assume, is no formal training.”
“W-Wait, how did you know?” Asked Hopper.
“Couldn’t afford a tutor. The fact you can’t see means many expenses went into making your home more friendly for you so it’s unlike your parents could afford singing and guitar lessons on top of that. That basically means that you used that enhanced hearing you got overtime to develop an ear for music.”
“Thank you~! <Yawn>”
“<Yawn> You said it…!” Added Spots. “G’night…”
“Oh right—! You need to sleep. I shall take my leave. Good night everyone.” Bid Ironbug as she left.
“Good night!”/ “Sleep well!”/ “Nice dreams!”/ “Have a comfortable sleep!”