Chapter Text
dear shikamaru
whattaya mean, temari was the admirer?!
why didn't you tell us?!
- naruto
Dear Shikamaru:
You could have told me, I wouldn't have said anything to anyone!
Your best friend,
Choji
Jerk, you could have told us BEFORE we went medieval on that stupid butcher.
And I'm with Temari on this one, it WAS funny. :)
~Tenten~
That was anticlimactic.
- Shino
Dear Shikamaru,
What the hell do you mean, it was your girlfriend?!
I spent a whole WEEK doing community service and smelling dead animals at that meat place, and you couldn't have dropped a line?
That's the last time I try to help you out in a pinch!
Your 'supposed' friend,
Kiba
How absurd!
And you better not be lumping me in with the rest of these idiots when you mention your insane 'friends'!
Neji
DEAR SHIKAMARU
YOSH, WOMEN ARE QUITE DIFFICULT!
I'M SORRY ABOUT YOU AND TEMARI!
YOUTHFULLY YOURS,
ROCK LEE
They're still together, Lee.
~Tenten~
OH. SORRY AGAIN.
STILL YOUTHFULLY YOURS,
ROCK LEE
Um, sorry Shikamaru. At least it all turned out for the best, right?
~Hinata Hyuga
~Dear Shikamaru~
You're a dead man when I get ahold of you~! ♥
~Ino
Dear Shikamaru,
I mean, you've got a lot of NERVE talking smack about us when all we were trying to do was help you! And it wouldn't have killed you to simply TELL us that your back-stabbing manipulative girlfriend was the one that tricked us!
Someone who was TRYING to help,
Kiba
What am I even doing?
- Sakura
Committing sacrilege on Shikamaru's journal.
- Shino
Why?
- Sakura
~Because we're mad at him
~Ino
Okay...?
- Sakura
Just go with it.
- Shino
People just keep writing in this and giving it back to me, how did you guys even get ahold of it?
- Sakura
Naruto found it and decided to share with the group.
Neji
dear shikamaru
he's lying
also, your underwear drawer is a really stupid hiding place
-naruto
I sincerely hope you aren't serious, Naruto.
Neji
Dear Shikamaru,
And FURTHER MORE, why wouldn't you want to tell us to begin with? Because you were embarrassed your girlfriend was smarter than you? Like that's NEWS?!
Still pissed off,
Kiba
Where IS Shikamaru, anyway? We've been passing this around for a while, and usually he's gotten his panties in a wad by now.
~Tenten~
Dear Everyone:
He was finally cleared for missions last week, and he's been out on one ever since.
Your friend,
Choji
Oh. That explains it.
So when does he get back? This is kind of boring if he's not here to react to it.
~Tenten~
~It should be sometime in the next few days, Tenten.
~Seriously, Naruto?
His underwear drawer?
~Ino
i was trying to catch him before he left, and his parents invited me in!
-naruto
☺
~Sai
Go away, Sai.
- Sakura
:(
~Sai
I am not weirder than him.
- Shino
Sorry, he thought he was signing a get-well card.
- Sakura
Dear Shikamaru,
MEAT! I'm STILL smelling freaking MEAT! EVERYWHERE! And all because I thought I was doing you a stupid favor!
Wishing you and your girlfriend endless suffering,
Kiba
You still owe me for those toys!
Neji
dear shikamaru
oh and i already knew about your mom not liking temari, she told me in the kitchen that day i spent with you after you fell asleep and i wanted a snack
-naruto
Heads up guys, he just got back!
~Tenten~
Dear Shikamaru,
I'm not speaking to you until you apologize, jackass. My dog even smells like liver.
Screw you,
Kiba
P.S. Your girlfriend is a sadist.
Dear Journal:
I'm never writing in this again.
Your now friendless author,
Shikamaru