Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Ian woke up to the soft pitter patter of rain hitting the roof and sliding down the window. Another wonderful Chicago day. He rolled over to see his boyfriend was already up.He stretched his arms above his head then fell back lazily against his pillows.

“Hey you’re up.” He turned to see his boyfriend Craig standing in the doorway staring at him with a wide smile, his brown hair freshly slicked back, and hazel eyes magnified by his wire rimmed glasses. He liked Craig. They would be together 2 years this October which was the longest relationship he’d been in. It’s not that he was a serial dater, he just didn’t date. His life revolved around his store and his friends. Dating never crossed his mind until he met Craig.

.

“I made you breakfast. It’s a kale and chia seed smoothie.” Craig handed him the blended concoction.

He bunched his nose and shook his head passing it back “No thanks. It smells like grass..”

Craig closed his hand around the glass pushing it back towards him. “Trust me. You’ll love it.” His boyfriend kissed his cheek then headed over to the door. “Going to be late for a meeting, got to run. See you for dinner?”

“Yep. I already made reservations. Angelos 8pm” he replied as he tested out the witches brew.

Craig waved to him then he heard the closing of the front door.

Finally.

He jumped up from the bed and walked into the kitchen rinsing the smoothie down the sink. Nasty. It wasn’t even blended all the way. There were clumps of kale and protein powder falling out in small puke green globs. He likes smoothies and all but that was a little too much for his taste, at least add some fruit or something. Craig was a health nut. In fact he had a column in the Chicago Tribune dedicated to health and fitness. Craig was kind and funny but a little self absorbed. Let’s be real, he was very self absorbed. He had a habit of looking down on people who didn’t share his outlook on life and fitness.

He met Craig at the gym down the street from his apartment. Craig was doing a workshop on maintaining a healthy weight and the importance of portion control which was something he’d been fond of since moving out on his own. He would take a nice fresh cobb salad over a greasy burger anyday. It had been years since he had a french fry.

He walked over to the window and peered out checking to be sure his boyfriend was gone. He wasn’t sure why he felt the need to be so elusive, he wasn’t doing anything wrong. Not really. It was just chatting. Maybe it was because he felt a connection when he read the messages on his phone that he’d never felt with anyone before, including Craig.

He didn’t do it on purpose. When he downloaded the messenger app it was to talk to fellow nerds about comics. How was he supposed to know that hiding in the corners of the internet he would find what could only be described as his soul mate? All he wanted was someone to talk shop with. Craig wasn’t a fan of comics. He didn’t rag on them but he couldn’t sit there and discuss the latest X-men either, which was upsetting because that’s all he wanted to do. He loved comics. He owned a comic book store called Comics & Characters.

He unlocked his screen and his lips turned up into a toothy grin when he saw the bright red 1 above his messenger app. He clicked on the message then walked over to his closet to pick out something to wear.

B0$$B0y_420: I like when the skies all dark and cloudy. It seems like you can get a better sense of self when you’re not followed around by a big ass ball of sunshine. Don’t get me wrong, I can get down with a beautiful day as much as the next guy but somethin about an overcast sky just puts me in a happy place.

Ian buttoned his flannel, grabbed his keys from the table and locked the door behind him. He zipped up his jacket and headed down to the garage phone in hand, his fingers hastily buzzing over the keyboard.

**

ComicB00kL0v3r:  I get it. I love the way the air smells after it rains. Nothin like it. They try and mimic it with candles and air freshener but nothin compares to that first breath of fresh air after several hours of hard rain. I think my favorite thing is how the sun reflects on the leaves of the trees after, like a thousand tiny crystals.

Mickey stared out the window absently tapping the corner of his phone on the table. It really was beautiful. He already was a fan of the darker skies but now he was noticing the raindrops as they slid down the window. Something he would have ignored if a certain someone hadn’t mentioned the beauty in the rain. He usually didn’t have the time or the urge to stop and smell the roses but that was something he found himself doing more and more these days.

The grand opening of his store was in two weeks and today he’s doing the final walkthrough. It’s about time. He’d been waiting on this moment for over a year since he decided to move back to Chicago from New York. With a little help from his Grandfather and his father he was able to open the first location of hopefully many in Chicago. He was the owner and founder of Milkovich Graphics and Gifts . His store sold everything from video games and gaming supplies to graphic novels and comic books. He also carried novelty supplies like journals, stationery, art and gift sets. It was pretty sweet.

His business exploded in New York because of his unique atmosphere incorporating a coffee shop into his store. That small difference took his shop from a suite in a strip mall to a multimillion dollar company. It took 10 years but now he was back home and intended to do the same, opening stores throughout Chicago. Turning the MIlkovich name which used to be associated with crime into a legacy.

“Seriously Mickey! Why are you still sitting there?” He turned to see his boyfriend Blake running around frantically.

“What else am I supposed to be doin?” He clicked open the app on his phone re reading the last message. It was so poetic and abstract, like whoever was behind the keyboard.

“Where are my keys? Oh my fucking god!”

He rolled his eyes and reached forward grabbing the keychain from the table. “Keep sayin you should get a fuckin lanyard for those, maybe then you wouldn’t lose them all the fuckin time.”

“I’m just nervous. I don’t need a lanyard.” Blake walked over to him and he quickly clicked off his screen then turned to accept a kiss. “My book is being released today and I’m hoping we can get a tour set up for this year.” Blake opened the front door and grabbed his thermos from the end table. “Wish me luck.”

“Good luck.” He smiled and waved goodbye to his boyfriend. He felt a cold nose against his leg and looked down to see Baxter staring at him with big pathetic eyes. He reached down and pet his smooth fur eliciting a loud whimper from the German Shepherd. Baxter ran over to the front door and pawed at it, loud whimpers filled the apartment. “All right dude, hold the fuck on.” He looked around for his shoes then grabbed Baxter’s leash and jacket. “Time to go potty aint it. Who's a good boy?”

**

B0$$B0y_420: Baxter almost caught a squirrel. His ass chased the fuckin thing around the courtyard but the little shit got away. One of these days he won't be so lucky.

ComicB00kL0v3r: Jesus! Poor squirrel.. What could it possibly have done to deserve such a violent death sentence?

B0$$B0y_420: He teases him through the fuckin window. All night I sit at the table workin and watch him talk shit. Then Baxters dumb ass barks and barks until the little fucker runs away. The thing I wonder is how he knows which squirrel it is you know?

Ian laughed picturing the face off between Baxter and the mischievous squirrel.

ComicB00kL0v3r: Maybe he’s psychic.

“Ok, that it.” His friend Janine walked over to him with arms folded and a raised brow then leaned against the counter. “You’ve been grinning like the Cheshire cat all week Ian, I demand details. Spill.”

“I have not!” He walked behind the counter and opened the register. “It’s nothing really.”

“It’s not nothing. That’s the look of love. You are so in love!”

“Jesus Janine.. love really?” He wrote down the dollar amounts as he counted the register. “I’m not in love.”

“Then what is it then?”

“Nothing. Can’t a guy be in a good mood?”

Janine pursed her lips “Fine. Be that way. I’m just going to stand here until you tell me.”

“But we open in 10 minutes.”

“Sucks for you cause I’m not moving.” Janine swept her blonde hair behind her neck then leaned over the counter eyes glued on him.

He took in a deep breath, feeling his heart swell as a smile crossed his lips. He folded his arms and leaned over the counter meeting his friend. “Is it cheating if you’re involved with someone online?”

Janine laughed.“You dog! Have you had sex?”

Ian held up his hands in defense “What? No.. i..it’s not like that at all.”

“You mean you haven’t sexted? There’s been no what are you wearing or...dick pics?”

“Oh my god really Janine?” He scoffed and closed the register door grabbing his clipboard. “No we haven't sexted, he’s not like that. He’s sweet and charming.”

“Charming? You’re not in a romantic comedy Ian, nobodies charming these days.”

“He is.”

**

Mickey walked around the store with his best friend and advisor Scott. “I don't know man, I just can’t get this guy off my mind.” He leaned against the wall and pulled out his phone, re reading the same message from this morning. “He’s smart, funny, and the way he talks about shit...it’s fuckin enchantin.”

“Enchanting?” Scott laughed and took a sip of his coffee. “He’s enchanting? Does he live in a tower and have an evil stepmother too?”

“Fuck off.” He slipped his phone back in his pocket. “What can I say man, the guys gets to me.” He walked over to the window and stared out at the busy street watching the people passing by. “Where’s Danny aint he supposed to be here by now to install the lights?”

“He should be here but he got another DUI last night. Megan called me an hour ago, says she’s working on finding a bondsman.”

“Again? Fuckin moron. How many times I tell him, you can’t pass out drunk in your fuckin car.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “So no lights today, fuckin great, how bout the shelves? We got them done down here all that’s left is the upstairs.”

“Yea...about the shelves.” Scotts averted his eyes so he raised his brow.

“Go on..”

“The oak we’ve been using is on backorder so Terry is looking around for another supplier.”

“Another..” He kicked the trashcan by the entryway. “Another fuckin supplier! Awesome, fuckin sweet.” He shook his head and walked over to Scott and grabbed his shoulder. He fixed their eyes with a desperate stare. “We open in two weeks.”

“I know.”

“Two fuckin weeks Scotty!”

“I know. Don’t worry.” Scott reached out grabbing his shoulders and shaking him. “We got this shit man. You’re fucking  Mickey Milkovich and soon this place will be the talk of the town just like New York.”

He nodded and let go stepping back and looking around the room. “Damn straight.” He straightened his jacket and felt his phone buzz. He pulled it from his pocket and sighed. “Ugh I’m late. Gotta meet Terry to go over some figures. Call me when you hear from Danny?”

“Sure thing Boss man.”

“That’s right..” He walked out the door brimming with a sense of pride. That’s why Scott was his best friend, not only did the guy stroke his ego when he needed it but he was his voice of reason whenever he started to revert back to his old ways. You can get anything done with threats and violence, but a successful business man uses his words and reputation. He was well known in New York and Scott was right, soon the city would be his.

**

ComicB00kL0v3r: Saw a ladybug today on the sidewalk. I thought it would be too cold but there she was. Or he.. wow. I wonder how many dude ladybugs fly around thinkin if you call me a lady one more fucking time lol..

Mickey rolled his eyes and smiled. Fuckin guy was too cute. Who thinks about shit like that? He heard someone clear their throat and turned on the couch to look at his Father and Grandfather. He slipped his phone back in his pocket. “Did you hear the news Dad? That gamin store on 59th, the one with all the D&D supplies, dice and shit” he licked his lips as smirk crept across his face. “Looks like they went out of business.”

Terry laughed and pulled a cigar from the box on the table. “That’s such a shame.” His Dad leaned back in the chair. “Poor bastard never stood a chance against you.”

His Grandfather nodded his head in agreement “You may be a queer but you’re a fuckin shark kid.”

Mickey rubbed at his nose. He hated when they used that word but at least he and his family were on speaking terms again. His Grandfather was even more old fashioned than Terry and that was saying something. They may be working together, but he still made a point to remind him how he felt. He didn’t care. They could go suck a dick. He single handedly took the family business from dealin drugs and guns to buyin up the competition and absorbing what they sold into his business model. He had nothing to do but grow. One day he hoped to be the largest and most well known in the gaming and comic  world. One stop shoppin for everything.

His dad Terry, had the connections, he knew the market and how much people made around town. He was the key to understanding his competition. His Grandfather Charlie helped him manage his money. God forbid shit took a turn and he went outta business Charlie made sure he had money stashed here and there so he could keep up his lifestyle. At face value it was a family business but they knew and respected who was boss.

“Yea well sink or swim right? Fucker sank. Not like I didn’t give em a fair offer for the place first. They chose to go bankrupt so I say fuck em. Now we’re the only ones this side of town who sell gamin shit. He stood up from the couch and walked around leaning his back against it. He folded his arms across his chest. “We can keep the locals too. Gonna offer a class twice a week on drawin up characters.”

Charlie’s brows knitted and the man glanced over to his father then back at him. “We in the drawin business now? Thought you sold books? Or is this one of your artsy fartsy gay things?”

Mickey scoffed and let out a small laugh. He raised his brow at his Grandfather.. “Dungeons.And.Dragons.” Charlie still looked dumbfounded. “Holy fuck Gramps. You're supposed to be the smart one. Characters? Like role-playin and shit. People build characters and worlds for the game and we’re gonna offer a class for beginners. Like a tutorial..”

“Ohh. Ok. Sorry son, all that fantasy shit sounds like fairy business. Goes over my head.”

“You two better get educated, cause that fantasy shit is our bread and fuckin butter.” He walked back around and plopped on the couch. “Anyway, now that place is outta the way we only got two more to go.” He grabbed his smokes from the table lighting one up. “There's uh.. this little shack of a place that sells video games, or attempts too. They have a very limited selection so I think we can buy em out.” He took a drag of his cigarette and let it dangle in his teeth as he grabbed his phone from his pocket. “Then there’s that little place round the corner Characters & Comics or Comics & Characters doesn’t fuckin matter. ”

“Oh yea..” Terry smiled and puffed on his cigar. “Monica's store. That women was one of a kind. A real firecracker but that’s what made her so special, she had an outlook on life that was..unique.”

Mickey smiled setting down his phone and turning to look at his dad “You knew her?”

“Knew is a loose term. We talked now and again, danced a few times back in the day. Best lay of my life.” Terry laughed. “Had my eyes on her before I met your mom, but some college prick swooped in and married her. She passed about 10 yrs ago. Cancer. Her son runs the place now I think.”

“Hm” he mused trying to picture his father dancing. “Sucks for him then don’t it.” He laughed wickedly and took another drag of his cigarette. “We done here? I’m fuckin starvin.”

“I think..” Terry was cut off by a knock on the door then the room was being flooded with different flower arrangements.

“Ugh” Mickey bunched up his face in disgust. “Still can’t believe you’re marryin that whore.”

Terry grabbed an arrangement and sniffed it. “That whore is the mother of your child Mikhailo.”

He smacked his hand down against the desk. “No fuckin shit. I might’ve been piss drunk when I fucked her, dont mean I blacked out for the last 8yrs. That’s my fuckin point. It’s fuckin weird.”

“She’s pregnant Mikhailo..”

”Yeah with his kid,” he pointed to Charlie. “Since when do you care so much bout family values. You’re the asshole who hooked us up in the first fuckin place. You fed me so many fuckin shots..”

“Watch your tone boy. There was a time I thought a good fuck might save you from your faggy fuckin lifestyle but I was wrong. Don't mean I’m gonna let good pussy go to waste.”

“She fucked him. She’s a whore!”

”That was before we hooked up. She’s gonna be your stepmom so watch uour fuckin mouth.” 

He shivered and shook his head “What the fuck ever. Do what you’re gonna do, I'm gonna bounce before I puke on your fuckin bouquets.” He turned and walked briskly out of the office and down the stairs. Fuckin stupid people. He walked over to his car then headed to get some much needed food before he snapped on the wrong person. He still had business to attend to, best to keep himself in check. Hard to do when you’re hangry.

**

B0$$B0y_420: ever wonder why they created drive thrus? It’s supposed to speed shit up but it don’t fuckin work. I think when you’re in your car, not a care in the world, you take longer than if you were standin in line with someone tellin you to hurry the fuck up. I mean they have cars behind them but it’s not the fuckin same. You know what I mean?

Ian racked his head against his steering wheel. All he wanted was a panini and a salad. He should have just parked. It had been 10 minutes and he was still 2 cars behind the pick up window. He sat back in his seat and pulled out his phone. His anon chat buddy always seemed rushed yet still had the time to chat with him. He wondered what it would be like to live like that. He didn't like waiting 10 minutes for food but it wouldn’t ruin his day. The world was bigger than that.

ComicBookLov3r: Sometimes I think people move too fast. Everyone's too caught up in their own bullshit to notice the world moving around them. We are just one part in a giant machine. We put too much value on our own personal existence and forget to appreciate the little things that make up the big picture.

**

Mickey took a bite of his panini. Chicken Bacon Ranch...so good. He sat in his car with the window down and listened to the sound of the cars passing as he closed his eyes and chewed his food. He should be heading back to the store to follow up on Danny and worry over deadlines but instead he was trying to slow down take his mysterious friends advice about appreciating the little things. He wondered what he looked like. Had he seen him before? With a personality like that was he single? He opened his eyes and drew in a deep breathe because he should stay away from those thoughts. He had Blake. He was annoying, narcissistic and able to keep up with his attitude. C0micB00kL0v3r was too sweet for the mess that was his life. He seemed put together but really he was on a constant search for something, more money, power..who the fuck knows. He knew he would never be happy until he found it. He didn't have the same methodical view of life as the man behind the keyboard but that didn't mean he couldn’t pretend for a moment. Everyone needs a little fantasy.

**

Ian parked his car then walked inside his store to see Matty, Janine and Sheila all standing by the door. “What?” He looked over his coworkers in confusion. “I..is there something on my face?” He wiped at his face then scratched behind his neck. “Can you guys say something you’re freaking me out.”

“You walked right by it Ian.” Matty opened the door and he followed him outside and around the corner. “How did you not see it, the sign’s huge.”

He scoffed. “How did I not see..” he paused feeling his mouth go dry. There, in big black letters on the side of what he thought was going to be a baby gap or maybe an Anne Taylor, was none other than the book conglomerate that tore apart New York one shop at time. Milkovich Graphics & Gifts .

“We’re doomed” Janine leaned her head on his shoulder. “I might as well call my parents and tell them I’m moving back home.”

“You and me both. I should probably start signing up for day labor.”

“What?” Ian shrugged his friend off his shoulder. “You guys are insane.” He let his eyes trail over  the giant building. “They have nothing to do with us. They’re big, impersonable and we know more about comics then all they’re sales people combined. I’m not worried.” He turned and started to walk away, stopping when he noticed his friends were still standing on the corner. “Come on you guys. We have a store to run.”

Chapter Text

Mickey wiped the grease from his hands with a rag and took a sip of his beer as he leaned against the wall. He was almost there. Just a few more parts and an oil change and the piece of shit bike his brother passed off on him would be a masterpiece. His brother Jaime owned a parts and repair shop, when he moved back home he gifted him with a pile of scrap metal. In his free time, which was few and far between, he liked to hang out at the shop enjoying a cold beer, the occasional joint and the sweat of manual labor. He may have traded in his cut off shirts for a suit jacket but his blood was South Side through and through.

He lit up a cigarette and started to go through the bucket of wrenches when he heard a sound that made his heart melt.

“Dad!” No sooner did the words fly into his ears small arms were wrapped around his waist. He turned to see Svetlana holding Charlie's son Xavier and staring at him with her usual judgemental stare. He could be a millionaire, which he was damn near was and the women would still look at him like a street thug.

He put out his cigarette then reached down and lifted his 8yr old son up from the ground and held him against his side. “Hey there kid. I missed ya. You miss me?”

“Always Dad. Mom says you’re gonna take us to the carnival tomorrow and..and we get to spend the night. Is it true can we go? Can weee?”

“I am, am I?” He turned to Svetlana. “New to me. Ain't you supposed to be takin them to the Zoo? No one told me anythin about it.”

“I was” Svetlana replied staring at her nails. “Plans change now you take. I go look at cake with Nika today and tomorrow I look at dress..”

He didn’t even notice the skinny blonde standing behind the women. She was russian too but looked like she’d done one too many drugs.

“If problem I tell Charlie. I take Yev and son, give to daycare.”

Svetlana handed Xavier to Nika then attempted to take his son from his arms. He backed up and stuck his hand out. “Whoa. Relax..it’s fine.”

“No I take. You’re too busy playing with toys. No time for flesh and blood. Give Yev. Come.” Svetlana gestured towards her chest. “Give.”

“No.” He walked up to the women “I said it’s fuckin fine. I’m gonna take my kid and Xavier. We’ll go see a movie or somethin and tomorrow we’ll go to the fuckin carnival.” He turned back to the little boy in his arms and kissed his cheek. “And we’re gonna have a blast aint that right Yevy.” He tickled his stomach and the boy giggled causing his face to break out in a prideful grin. Svetlana was a one night stand from a confusing time, but the gem that came from their drunken mishap was perfect. The light of his life. He would go back and do it all over again if he had to.

“Fine. You go” Svetlana conceded. “No candies yes? Their teeth will rot.”

“Come on Svet” He set his son on the ground in exchange for Xavier. “What's a carnival without cotton candy.” He smiled at the women meeting her eyes “Little sweets never hurt anyone.”

Svetlana walked up to him then leaned down, her lips brushing against his ear. “I want candy too” she whispered in what was meant to a seductive manner but only made him nauseous. She stood up and hooked her arm in Nikas. “One Cotton Candy yes? That’s it and they share Mikhailo..”

He raised his brow at the bold gesture. He HATED when people called him by his full name. His Dad got away with it, because he fuckin named him but that was it. “Yea sure I got it. You can go now. Bye.” He waved away the two women. Svetlana turned up her nose, then the two walked out of the shop. He looked down at his son. “Here’s the plan Yev. First we gotta go to my house so I can change, then you can pick out whatever movie you want and we can get pizza and popcorn! You in?”

“Yay, let’s do it Dad!” Yev jumped up and down in excitement. “What about you little man?” He bounced Xavier in his arms. “You ready to have some fun?”

“Uh huh. I want pizza!” He held up his hand and received the tiniest of high fives.

“All right boys, let’s roll.”

**

Ian flipped through the channels on the Tv trying his best to find a distraction from the voice in his head telling him it was over. Mikovich Graphics & Gifts has only been open for a month and already they were losing business. According to Sheila this week alone he made 1500$ less than he did the same time last year. At this rate they wouldn’t last to see the New Year.

“Maybe I should close the shop. If I do it now, then maybe we won't be completely broke.”

Craig sat down next to him and set his hand on his leg. “You can’t do that Ian. People need you.”

He scoffed throwing his hands up. “Why Craig? Why do they need me. I’m just the guy who runs the comic book shop. What is it that I even do?”

“What do you even do?” Craig stood up and rubbed his chin. “What you do Ian is provide an escape. You help create friendships you..you are a lone reed.”

He glanced up at his boyfriend “What are you even saying right now?”

“I’m saying... You’re a lone reed Ian.” Craig pulled out his phone and held it in front of his face. “A lone reed waving boldly in the corrupt sands of commerce.”

“I think it get it.”

“What you’re doing Ian by not backing down is taking a stand. You’re noble and you’re showing the people of this town that you won’t go down without a fight.”

He laughed and rolled his eyes. “Ugh...you’re right. I’m not gonna let this asshole come into my town and run me out of business. I won’t do it.”

“That’s the spirit babe. I’m gonna go fetch us some dinner.”

“Go to that little thai place on the next block. They have the best noodle bowls.”

“Chicken?”

“Yup.” He waited until he heard the door close then slumped back into the couch. Where did it go wrong? He went to bed one night on top of the world then the next day everything he worked for, his whole existence was being threatened. What would Monica do?

***

It was the perfect day a carnival. The wind had a slight chill but the sun was shining and the leaves were just starting to turn colors. He had stopped by the store to get a quick rundown after the carnival then they walked across the street to the ice cream shop. No sweets my ass. He bought his son a double chocolate milkshake with snickers bites and little Xavier ended up with plain vanilla, however he did steal all the brownie pieces from his bowl of rocky road. He missed spending time with his family. Svetlana had full custody of Yevgeny because he ran.

He took the money he had from working with Jaimie at the shop and whatever he could fit and a suitcase and ran for New York. He wasn’t ready to be a dad, he was barely ready to be himself back then. When he came out to his dad, he almost killed him. His brothers intervened but that was a wakeup call. He would either die of some methodically planned out hate crime or spend his life in juvie for a sellin and doin drugs. He did what he needed to.

New York was unlike any place he’d ever been. People were brash but not mean. There was a place for everyone. He got a job at a small bookstore doing inventory the first week. Sometimes the owner would let him have the clearance books but what drew his eyes the most were the graphic novels. The first time he sat down and read one he was hooked. The format, the art, just everything about it. It was like reading a book and watching a movie at the same time. He started buying one with each paycheck and soon he had a whole collection. The only problem was the bookstore only had so many titles and he knew there were more out there. He’d seen them at other shops but never stayed long enough to check them out. Most of the stores he went to were empty except for the guy at the counter who clearly lived with his mother still. Those that did have a few people were worse. The staff would linger around those select few, most likely friends, and ignore everyone fuckin else. They were dark, some were musty. It made the whole experience suck.

That’s when it hit him.

He was in New York. The city of dreams. He had a job with decent pay and his record had been closed since he turned 18. He found a bank and after endless mounds of paperwork and 6 months of inspections, permits, and research, he opened his first store. That was 8 years ago. Now he was back home working with the people who drove him away and his wallet was happily lined with cash and plastic. His family would never want for anything. He had 4 stores in New York and this one in his hometown would make 5. Life was good.

They finished their ice cream and now they were heading to the car. He still had the rest of the afternoon with the kids. He was thinkin another movie and a big bucket of popcorn.

“Daddy look!” He looked up to see his son standing in front of a sign.

The Comic Book King Presents

Cookies and Comics

2:30pm - 3:30pm

“Can we go please Dad? I wanna hear a story pleaase!” He smiled at his eager son and checked the time on his phone. It was 3:15pm so there was still some time before it ended. Enough to satisfy an 8 yr old.

“We gotta hurry. Come on.” He walked over to the door holding it open for his son, Xavier comfortably resting in his arms. He caught the name as he walked in. Comics & Characters hmm..ironic. “Hey wait for me” he called after the running child.

He caught up to his son who was standing in the back of a small crowd of maybe 10 children and their parents. They were all armed with a cookie and what looked like a placemat.

“Here you go sir.” He turned to see a man mid 20’s with spiky black hair and a nose ring. “Here’s your print out and a couple cookies for the little ones. Go ahead and pop a squat anywhere. It’s easy to catch up.”

“Uh thanks..” He grabbed the small baggie of cookies and the laminated paper and sat down in the back. Yev sat next to him and Xavier sat in his lap as they listened to the Comic Book King explain why Garfield hates Mondays.

“Poor Garfield looked around his cat bed. It was a Monday and nothing had happened yet..maybe the dark days were gone.” The man stuck his hand out flat in front of his face lost in the role he was playing. “He looked this way… and he looked that way.” His eyes met with green ones and for a moment he forgot how to breath, then the man smiled. “Looks like the coast is clear. Hmph” the stranger straightened his shoulders and set his jaw as he read “Garfield stood tall and looked at Odie. ‘Mondays don’t scare me anymore friend.’ SPLAT!!!  A pie came shooting across the room knocking garfield onto his back. Garfield furrowed his brow and crossed his arms  ‘Nope I’m not scared of Mondays but they really cheese me off.’ The man closed the comic and leaned forward resting his head in his hands. “And that my friends is reason 104 for why Garfield hates Mondays.” The room broke out into a mixture of childish laughter and heavy applause. He watched as parents walked up to the mysterious man hugging him and shaking his hand.

He looked over to see his son was no longer next to him. Sneaky little shit. He stood up grabbing Xaviers hand and slowly made his way around the shop. It was cute. They carried a wide array of comics but the atmosphere was geared more towards kids. There were murals on the walls with different comic characters and action figures of all sizes displayed around along with randomly placed bean bags and funky painted benches. This is where he found Yev. He was sitting on a bean bag in the corner flipping through a graphic novel. “You like that kid?” He pushed up the boys hands so he could peak at the title. “Calvin & Hobbes that’s a classic. Good thinkin.” He flipped through a few of the book surprised to see several titles they didn’t carry.

“I want..” Xavier pointed to a comic with a bright red cover and yellow lightning bolt. “Can I have that oooone?”

“The Flash.” A gentle voice came from behind him and he turned to see the man from earlier, a plastic crown still on his head. Instead of standing he was crouched down next to the 5 yr old. “He’s one of my favorite Superheros.” The man pulled down the comic and flipped through it. “It’s a pretty big read for such a tiny human, you like to read?”

“My daddy buys me comics all the time.”

The man looked up at him and smiled a cat like grin that made his palms sweat. “Well isn’t that nice of him.”

Xavier looked at him then back at the man “No. that’s not daddy that’s my nephew.”

Green eyes looked up at him with a raised brow then back to the small child and laughed “I don’t really think that he could be your nephew.”

“No i..it's true” He watched as the stranger stood up from the ground. His face was speckled with tiny freckles and his red hair was combed back yet still messy under his crown. “Um.. Xavier is my Uncle. Ain't that right Uncle Xaiv..”

“Mmhmm that’s right.”

“Guess who I am!” Yev walked between him and the beautiful stranger. “Come on guess.”

The man looked at him and tapped his finger against his lips in thought

“Let me think...You must be his grandfather.”

Yev shook his head.

“His brother?”

“No” the little boy laughed then wrapped his arms around his waist. “I’m his son.”

“Oh. Well isn’t that nice.”

Mickey rubbed at his nose noticing the glimpse of confusion and disappointment in the man's eyes. “You know how it is. Yev here is my mini me and Xavier is my Grandfather's son.”

“Your Grandfather's ...son…”

“Money buys love.” He laughed and grabbed both boys hands. “Haven’t you heard?”

The red-haired man laughed and batted his green eyes as he walked behind the counter to the register. “It might buy love, but it can’t buy happiness. Not true happiness.” The man looked up at him. “You know what I mean? Have you ever been truly happy? I have. I used to come here with my mom after school and I would sit and read, losing myself in epic battles without a care in the world…”

Mickey stood there hanging off every word. He must have been drooling because the man started to apologize. “I’m sorry. I don’t normally...I got a little deep there didn’t I?”

“Yea..ya did but…” He was tongue tied. “What’s your name?” The question was blunt and to the point but rolled off his tongue with ease.

“Me?” The man smiled and grabbed the books from the counter scanning them. “I’m Ian. Ian Gallagher. This is my store, and you are?”

His eyes went wide and he stood up straight. “Uh Mickey. You can call me Mick. Th..This is your store?”

Ian nodded. “That’s right Mick. My mom left it to me and when I retire I’m gonna leave it to my son.”

“You have a son?”

Ian glanced away then met his eyes again with a shy smile playing at his lips “Not yet but maybe someday.”

He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see the man from earlier. His nametag read Matty. The man looked at him and stuck out his hand. “Thank you for coming in today man. You gonna come back for Cookies & Comics next week?”

He looked over at Ian who was staring at him with his lip sucked between his teeth as if they were both thrown by the question. “O..Of course. Yea we’ll be back. Kids loved it.”

“See.” Matty walked around the counter and patted Ian on the shoulder. “That’s why we're gonna be fine. Customer loyalty.”

Ian nodded his head and turned to him “I don’t know if you’ve heard but they’ve opened a Milkovich Graphics & Gifts across the street.”

“Milkovich!” Yev ran over to the counter “Milkovich that my d..”

“Wait.. is that a deadpool action figure?” He snatched the box from the display shelf next to the register and shoved it at his son. “Look how cool he is, he even has the button to make him talk.”

“Wow cool!”

“Yea so go over there with Xavier,” he pointed to a blue bench covered in red spiders… cute  “And play with it till I’m done ok.”

“Ok Dad.”

He turned back to Ian and laughed “Sorry bout that that. Kids. I’ll take the action figure too.”

“No I understand trust me. Don’t have my own but helped raise 3.”

“Really?”

“Mmhmm I’m the the 3rd oldest out of 6. It’s a kinda confusing but my Uncle turned out to be my Father so I can relate to your situation.”

“I like you” Mickey regretted the words the moment they left his mouth. Something about Ian was drawing out words and emotions that he wasn’t comfortable with. “You..I mean..You’re unique.” He averted his eyes wanting to duck and hide under the counter. He was never like this, he didn’t compliment people. Usually it was the exact opposite, he had a wicked tongue and could easily bring you to your knees with only words.

“Thank you Mick. I like you too, and that’s another reason we don’t have to worry.” Ian swiped his card and handed him the receipt. “Customer Service. Building relationships. We take the time to get to know you here Mick. We care about our customers like family. Milkovich Graphics and Gifts is about one thing. Money. They don’t care about their customers, they’re just walking dollar signs. No..that store doesn’t have a chance.” Ian's eyes darted around then he leaned over and whispered “Between you and me Mick, they can take their discounts and fancy coffee shop and go straight to H.E.L.L .” Ian leaned back and grabbed his bag setting it on the counter. “We don’t need corporate America to ruin what makes this town special.”

“Mmhmm.You do know every cooperation starts as a small business right?” He licked his lips and rubbed at his nose. “They don’t just blow up over night.”

Ian scoffed. “That may be, but there’s a difference between expanding and selling out. In taking pride for putting people out of business. Trust me I know these types. I read all about what this franchise did in New York.”

“That’s too bad aint it.”

“Yea, well I’m not gonna let that happen to my store. No way.”

Mickey grabbed his back and fixed his gaze with Ian’s. “You’re not goin down without a fight are ya?”

Ian smiled and leaned forward again “Not a fucking chance.”

He laughed and clicked his tongue grabbing up his bag. “That was a nice chat Ian. Really nice, but it’s time for us to go. Got a movie to see..” Ian was his competition and he was just rudely reminded of that. “Come on Yev. Xavier come here buddy.” He picked up the little boy and grabbed his sons hand.

“Bye Mick..”

Ian’s voice was drowned out by the bell on the door as they left. He started down the sidewalk and glanced back before they turned the corner. Sorry Ian. It’s not personal, it’s business.

Chapter Text

Ian sighed as he poked at his salad. He was losing. He smiled each day making his friends feel a blanket of security but inside he was falling apart. The store was more than his only source of income, jobs come and go. It was his livelihood. His legacy. He’d been working around the Comic Book shop since he was 6 yrs old. It was more like home than his own apartment.

When his mother passed he thought his Brother would sell it like the rest of her assets but no, she left it to him. She trusted him despite the place he was in at the time. There was a time where he couldn’t look himself in the mirror, where he hid from his family and preferred the company of strangers, but then he lost his mother.

Monica.  

The one person on this godforsaken planet who had any idea how it was to live life with bipolar. The store was his salvation, he wanted to take care of it and to do that he had to take care of himself. Now 10 years later, he was a completely different person. He was stable on his meds, with only the occasional episode. He was in a committed relationship and his life was dedicated to Comics & Characters . What would he do if he lost it? Why did the big bad wolf have to move into his neighborhood and try and knock his house down? He sighed feeling defeated and pulled out his phone.

ComicB00kLov3r: Sometimes I wonder about my life. I wake up every day with the same routine and until now I never stopped to think about what would happen if that routine changed. I lead a fairly normal existence, almost insignificant. I feel like I have one purpose in this life and I wonder what would happen if that one thing was suddenly gone. Would I be brave enough to try and find myself again, to stand up and start over? I don’t want an answer I just want to send this cosmic question out into the the void. So there it goes, goodnight dear void.

**

He stared at the message on his phone as he walked around the store. His usually upbeat friend was in trouble. He seemed lost and confused and he wanted to help. Only he wasn’t the one people turned to for advice so he didn’t know what to say. Instead, he would wait for a defining moment in his day when his dog knocked over a vase or his son glued his fingers together and use that to distract his friend from whatever shit storm they were dealin with.

It didn’t help that his life was going better than he expected and he didn’t want to brag. The neighborhood not only welcomed his store, they praised it. Now they had a place to sit and read comics, joke around and make friends. The D&D classes were a huge hit and the never-ending flow of coffee and sweet treats made it easy for someone to hang out all day and talk shop about the latest and greatest in the world of Superheroes. All those things plus the consistent and heavy stream of money coming in. He was on top of the world.

Tonight he and Blake were attending a party hosted by the Chicago Tribune. They wanted to do a piece on his boyfriends newest project and Blake insisted that he go. Normally he would say fuck off but he told himself if he wanted to wear the suit it was time he started to act the part. He was already skilled in business and devilishly good at closing a deal. The skill he lacked was networking. Terry did that for him but it was his store. He built it from the ground up and he was its face. Therefore, he should get exposure, spread his name around town. If going to a couple fancy pants parties did that, then fine.

He was sipping on his jack trying his best to follow along with Blakes interview but once his boyfriend got talking it was hard to listen. Blake had to be the most self-absorbed person he’d ever met. How it became more than a one night stand he didn’t know but it did. They had a townhouse together and a dog. Sounds like commitment.

“Get me some more wine will you?”

“Mickey?”

He was pulled from his thoughts by the glass in his face. He stepped back and grabbed the glass. “Watch where you put that thing”

“Pay attention then. I’m still talking with Randy, wine please.” Blake flashed a smile the bunched his nose. It was more of a smirk than anything. Fuckin prick.

“Sure thing.” He rolled his eyes and turned away from the conversation. He’d only taken a few steps when his body froze and the wine glass threatened to fall from his fingers. There, only a few feet away stood Ian Gallagher. The man whose smile and voice had been floating in and out of his mind since they met a few weeks ago. Ian Gallagher, the owner of the shop he was trying to put out of business. He made a beeline for the bar hoping, no praying that the red-haired man didn’t see him.

“Whiskey neat and a Merlot.” He leaned against the bartop and pulled out his phone. He ran his fingers over the screen trying to think if he wanted to say something. It’s not like he was cheating, just chatting...didn’t mean anythin. Buuut if he was textin on his phone all night Blake would make it a thing and he did NOT want to deal with that. His boyfriend was a bitch regularly, when he was in a mood he was insufferable. He stuck his phone back in his pocket and tapped his fingers against the marble surface. How long did it take for two drinks?

“Mickey?” He turned his head and there smiling at him holding his own empty glass was Ian. “You might not remember me. It’s I..”

“Gallagher. From the Comic book store.” He set a 20$ on the counter and grabbed his drinks. “I remember.”

Ian laughed and a hint of pink spread across his dimpled cheeks. “So how’s your Uncle?”

He grabbed the two drinks from the counter and smiled. “He’s good. Not much to complain about yet bein 5..”  Ian was standing there so innocent and naive staring at him. He took a sip from his jack. “ Look I got a diva with a thirst for blood waitin for me so..” he held up the glass of Merlot. “Nice seein ya.”

“It was..”

He was gone before the man could finish his sentence. What kind of sick joke was the universe playing on him? Not only was Ian his competition, he was doe-eyed and sweet. All the others he didn’t care for. He either wrote them a check or watched as they crumbled. He didn’t like that the latter was Ian’s choice. Charlie already tried the check and Ian ripped it up and slammed the door in his face. Now he had to tear apart the beautiful man's store piece by piece.

**

Ian stood there in a stooper. He wasn’t planning on running into Mickey. When he did he certainly wasn’t expecting to be dismissed. He shouldn’t care. He was with Craig and he had a wonderful friend online to fill in the gaps. It was better this way. He grabbed his rum & coke and started to walk back over to his group.

“Ian! Hey, how are you?” He looked to see Adam standing in front of him.  Adam was one of Craig's friends. He wrote the political section at the Tribune. Nice guy.

“Hey you.” He gave the man a friendly hug then stepped back. “I’m great just another holiday party.”

“Don’t I know it. Rachel has me going to 4 Christmas parties this year Ian. 4!”

He laughed and shook his head “Wow, you’ll be filled with the spirit of Christmas in no time.”

“So what’s the deal, man? I can’t believe you were talking with the enemy.”

He scoffed at the accusation “What? How was I..what are you talking about?”

“I don’t blame you. He’s charming, but he’s a snake.”

Ok, now he was getting annoyed. He folded his arms across his chest. “Are you high or something Adam? I told you not to do acid anymore. It fries your brain, clearly..”

“Good one but no. I saw you, Ian. You were talking with Mickey Milkovich at the bar.”

His face fell and his eyes went wide. “W..what Mickey Milkovich?”

“Mickey Milkovich..”

“As in..”

“As in he’s gonna take over everything.” Adam shrugged his shoulder then walked past him whispering in his ear. “Good luck.”

How could he be so stupid? How could he just...he sat there and talked shit..he...

Oh.no Mickey Milkovich.

No hiding behind cute little kids this time. He scanned the room until his eyes landed on his target. He stormed over to the dessert table where Mickey was standing. He grabbed a plate and walked up next to him. “Milkovich?” He laughed and scooped a spoonful of berries onto his plate. “Your last name is fucking Milkovich?”

Mickey looked up at him without out the least bit of concern on his face. “Yup. That’s my name. Don’t wear it out.”

“Ugh,” Ian scoffed and reached for a little dish of frozen yogurt. “ Mickey Milkovich...You really had me fooled. I didn’t...I” He scolded himself for how open he was those few weeks ago. “I didn’t know…”

“Who you were with?”

He furrowed his brow “What?”

Mickey laughed awkwardly “You know.. ‘I didn’t know who you were with’ “Mickey’s voice was gruff and his brow raised. “Come on Gallagher really? It’s from the Godfather. You know, when the movie producer realizes that Tom Hagen is an emissary of Vito Corleone? Just before the horses head ends up in the bed then he wakes up with the bloody sheets and he like ‘ahh ahh’..”

Ian stared blankly at the man because he had no idea what he was talking about and what it had to do with their conversation. “Just forget it.” Mickey started to walk away.

“Not so fast Milkovich.” He walked around to the other side of the table. “You were spying on me admit it. I thought you were so cute with your 5yr old Uncle. I bet they weren’t even your kids.”

Mickey laughed and rubbed at his nose “Why would I be spyin on you hm?”

“Because I’m your competition and you’re a snake slinking around pretending to be a good person.”

Mickey rolled his eyes as he slid a piece of cake on his plate “You’re wrong Gallagher, I wasn’t spyin on you and that was my Son and my Uncle.”

“Oh, yea? Then why were you there?”

Mickey started to scoop the mini Oreos from the side of the cake the popped one into his mouth “Cause I was spendin the fuckin day with my kid. I like to do fun shit with my family Gallagher. The kid wanted a story and a fuckin comic book. You have the best selection. For now...”

Ian stared with wide eyes watching Mickey as he spoke. “You know those cookies are part of the cake, they’re for everyone, you can’t just take them all”

Mickey shrugged his shoulder completely disregarding him and continued to pick at the little cookies with his fork and drop them on his plate next to his cake. “You got it pretty good at that little store don’t you Gallagher?” Mickey popped another stolen cookie into his mouth “It’s cute with the paintins and the toys. You bring in what around 350k a year am I right?”

Ian took his spoon and started scooping the cookies back onto the cake stand. “ I knew it.” He scoffed then walked to the other side of the table to grab some som nilla wafers for his yogurt. “I just… I knew it. You were spying on me!”

Mickey rolled his eyes and walked up to him. He leaned against the table setting his plate down, his blue eye locking in on his. “You’re right Gallagher. I got a ‘ super secret ’ list back at the office of the sales figures of a certain Comic Book store so inconsequential yet full of itself that I had to rush over there and spy on it for fear that it might put me out of business.” Mickey grabbed up his plate “Cause I like waistin my free time with fuckin espinage on a store that don’t even fuckin matter, get outta here with that shit.”

“You know what Mickey, my business does matter. People know they are going to get compassion and intelligence when they come to my store.”

“Intelligence? Yea sure whatever you say, man. How would they know if you were actually fuckin smart or just blowin smoke up their ass. Your main demographic is kids. They’re not stupid but they’re easily impressed”

“I.. You’re really something Mickey Milkovich. I can't even...”

Mickey stepped up to him leaving only inches between their face. “Can’t even what Gallagher, form a sentence?”

“You..you are just...” he stammered and backed away. “You...It doesn’t matter what you say, Milkovich. My shop was there before you and it will be there long after. People like you come and go, but stores like mine make this city.”

“Don’t fool yourself Gallagher. Stores like yours have an expiration date.” Mickey approached him again popping an Oreos in his mouth. He could feel his blood boil beneath his skin. He stared into wicked blue eyes but no words came out. “Only a matter of time til you have nothin but a few comics sittin on a shelf and a for sale sign on the window. When that happens..” Mickey leaned up, his breath hot against his ear, “I’ll be there" he whispered. "Might wanna be nice to me or I won’t be so generous when I snatch it up”

He started to speak but only a small surprised gasp came out. No one talked to him that way in a long time and he didn’t expect the man in front of him with his Armani suit and Drakkar Noir cologne to be so callous. He stood there stunned trying to summon the words to tell this man he would not back down and this means war but his mouth wouldn’t cooperate.

“What?” Mickey stepped back and raised a brow. “Cat got your tongue man, fuckin say somethin, you're creepin me out.”

“Is everything ok over here?” He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Craig standing there.

He picked up his plate and looked at his boyfriend “Yea we’re fine. I was just leaving.”

“Hi I’m Craig Davenport and you are?” Craig extended his hand to his nemesis and Mickey excepted.

“Mickey Milkovich.”

“Oh. Okay.” Craig looked between the two of them. “You’re the famous titan Mickey Milkovich? The destroyer of small businesses and liner of greedy pockets. Tell me Mickey, how do you sleep at night knowing you’re ruining peoples lives?”

“Easy..” A man with light brown hair gelled back hooked his arm in Mickey’s. “We sleep on a California king under a skylight, with a down blanket for those extra chilly nights.”  

He recognized the glass of Merlot. This was Mickey’s boyfriend? The man looked him over then turned to Craig and his eyes went wide. He let go of Mickey’s arm and walked right up to his boyfriend.

“You’re Craig Davenport aren’t you? I saw your picture in the Tribune!”

“Why yes, I am.” His boyfriend was starting to turn a light shade of crimson. “And you are?”

“Oh my god, I’m Blake Thomas of Thomas books. I have to say Mr. Davenport I’m a huge fan. That piece you did on understanding Ketosis was amazing. Who knew that high fat foods could lead to such amazing weight loss, I’m just..it’s such a pleasure to meet you.”

He looked over at Mickey who was staring at his boyfriend with the same look of confusion and annoyance that he was feeling towards his own. “Come on Craig let’s get back to our table.” He grabbed his boyfriends arm and turned to walk away.

“Nice to meet you, Blake.”

“The pleasure’s mine Mr. Davenport, thank you!”

He walked silently over to the table and sat down. Craig resumed conversation with his friends as if he’d never left. He played with his berries occasionally glancing up to see Mickey sipping his whiskey and laughing with his boyfriend and their group. How could he have been so stupid? His brother always told him he was a bad judge of character but this was one misstep even he couldn’t believe. Well, look out Mickey Milkovich because this was his town and no one, no matter how much money they had was gonna take it from him.

***

1 week later

Ian Gallagher. Ian fuckin Gallagher. How was someone so sweet such a pain in his ass. The man refused to close, so naturally, he was slowly putting him out of business. Normally this didn’t bother him. If people refused the buyout then fuck em. It was their fault if they lost everything, he tried.

He’d been playin hide and seek with Ian over the last week. He felt bad for how he spoke at the holiday party. Kinda... Maybe it was the lack of a response that was picking at him. It didn’t seem like a fair fight, more like an attack. Once he started on the warpath it was hard to stop. Here comes Mr. Nasty…

Now,  just like when you finally find the name of that song stuck in your head then it plays on every station, he was seeing Ian everywhere. Not just a glance from across the street but it felt sometimes like they were the only two people in the city...what the fuck? How is it he’d been back in Chicago a fuckin year and never laid on the redheaded man but now, when they’re at odds he couldn’t avoid the guy?

The universe is a fuckin asshole. That’s why.

First it was the grocery store. He shopped on Tuesdays, it was just part of his routine. He went around 8pm because there were hardly any people on the road or in the store. After a quiet shopping trip, he’d grab a redbox movie, hit up the liq and call it a night. That’s how it went.

So why was he duckin, and dartin into random aisles to avoid Ian fuckin Gallagher. He was around every damn corner. He almost decided to leave but then he would have to come back again and he already had a full cart. Not to mention he might be a dick, but he wasn't heartless. Some poor sap would have to put all that shit back. Instead, he grabbed a magazine from an endcap and carefully maneuvered his way through the rest of his shopping trip.

That wasn’t the only time though. No that would be too fuckin easy, and nothing for Mickey Milkovich was easy.

He needed some oil for his car. Middle of the fuckin day and the fucker decides to over heat. It’s fuckin November, what piece of shit car overheats in November? The autoparts store was only a few blocks from his office so he decided fuck it and went for a walk. He found what he was lookin for easily. He paid for it and made his way to the door when who other than Ian and that Matty guy pull up. They stepped out of a dark blue Honda Accord and walked towards the entrance. What he should’ve done is walked right past the fuckin guy, giving him his best glare and the devilish smirk he was known for that said ‘you don’t wanna mess with me, give up’ but nope. Not today. He scurried to the back of the small store and pretended to look at steering wheel covers until the cashier directed Ian to the part he was looking for.

Pussy.

It was the night before Thanksgiving. Blake wanted a pie but not just any pie. A black bottom pecan pie. It was the most delicious pie he’d ever tasted, with pecans, cinnamon apples and chocolate served in a flakey glazed pastry crust. It was worth the extra stop. Pies and Pastries was the only place that carried it. He decided to feed his personal sweet tooth as well. Blake might be in to all that diet and fitness with the rare exception but not him. He worked out but he ate whatever he wanted. Lifes too fuckin short to not take what you want and right now he wanted these lemon tartlets. There was a glass of milk and a spot on the couch waiting at home for him to sink in and indulge. Everyone does it. Shut up.

He looked at his phone. He’d been in line for 10 fuckin minutes. What’s the hold up? He stepped slightly from his place to see fuckin Ian Gallagher. He scoffed and licked his lips. “What the fuuuck?”

He rolled his eyes as he watched the man pull out his wallet, then reach into his pockets. He had 3 pies and a box of scones...maybe he forgot his card. He turned to the old women behind him and smiled “I’ma see what the hold up is, save my spot will ya?” The women nodded and now he was walking up to the register.

“It’s 50 cents. I come here all the time.” Ian voice was laced with frustration but he surprisingly calm.

“I’m sorry sir but you have to put something back” the cashier retorted not an ounce of sincerity in her voice.

“You can’t...” Ian scratched the back of his neck. “Jesus. It’s 50 cents!”

“Aye there Gallagher.” He walked up to the man and placed his hand on his shoulder. “What’s seems to be the problem here?”

Ian shrugged him off and rolled his eyes. “It’s fine Mickey. I don’t need your help.” Ian looked back to the cashier. “Let me check my pockets again I always..”

“Dude just put somethin back” The man behind Ian jeered. “We all got places to be.”

A very flustered looking Ian dug his hands in his pockets.

“What you forget your card or somethin?” He looked at the cashier and read her name tag Felicia..of course. “What’s the damage Felicia?”

“$26.50.”

He went to give the women his card when Ian shoed his hand away. “I don’t need your dirty money.” Ian turned to the cashier “Here is $26, I come here every week.”

“Im sorry sir but the policy..”

“Buh buh buh” He leaned against the register and smiled staring into the womens eyes. “Felicia right? That’s a pretty name.” The girl blushed. He might be gay but he could charm the pants of anyone...almost anyone. “Look Felicia, it’s Thanksgivin. It’s 50 cents beautiful” his eyes darted to the tip jar in front of the register. “How bout you take two quarters from that jar and this” he grabbed the cash from the counter and placed it in her hands. “And we can all go home and you don't lose out on a $10 sale. Whatcha say hm? Can you do that for me?”

“Y..yea sure.”

“Thank you, Felicia.” He turned to Ian and his eyes betrayed him taking in every feature on his face “Happy Thanksgivin.” He turned and walked back to his spot in line leaving behind a speechless Ian Gallagher...yet again.

When he finally got home he put the pies in the fridge where he found a note from his boyfriend saying he would be home late. He didn’t care.

He poured himself a glass of milk and sat down on the couch with his box of tarts. He should be happy with the outcome tonight, he came of as the chivalrous gentleman but even if Ian was impressed it wouldn’t take back what he said at the party. He was in business and it was a dangerous game. He wasn’t a bad guy, this is just how the world worked. Survival of the fittest. Ian was too sweet to survive a head to head with him, didn’t mean he had to make it more viscous than it already was. He took a bite of his sweet treat slipping into a tiny moment of bliss then pulled out his phone.

B0$$B0y_420: Ever say somethin so fucked up that immediately after you wonder how you could be that mean? Someone just pushes your buttons and provokes you. In that moment you know you should just walk away but instead, you tear them a new asshole because you can. Now, that’s all the person will ever see, some prick instead of the real you. I’m sure you have no idea what I’m talkin about..

C0micB00kL0v3r: No, I know what you mean. I wish I had that problem. When I get angry I get tongue tied and freeze like an idiot. It’s like I can’t think of what I want to say. Like this guy...no, this bottom-dweller I met the other day. I just stood there and let him belittle my existence. Even now days later and I got nothing…

C0micB00kL0v3r:   I bet whoever you went off on deserved it. You’re sweet and funny, they must’ve pissed you off pretty bad lol.

B0$$B0y_420: Yea lol they kinda did. Doesn’t matter now, not like it can take it back.

B0$$B0y_420: Wouldn’t it be cool if I could give you some or my trash talkin skills? I mean you gotta be careful, like I said. Shits not as fun as it sounds but then you could say what you need to say to your guy and I could take a chill pill for once lol.

C0micB00kL0v3r: Hm that would be nice..

Mickey stared at his phone screen. He knew he shouldn’t, he was playin a dangerous game but for some reason, he was drawn to the man behind the keyboard. Somethin happens when they talk, he feels….it’s like the man behind the keyboard knows more about him then he does. He’s shared his deepest secrets and they’ve been there for comfort. A stranger. He needed to know who he was and see if maybe...he could be more. He liked Blake but love was not in the equation. It was like they went on one bad date after the other until they decided to move in together. Yea..he didn’t get it either but it happened. Here goes nothin.

B0$$B0y_420: You wanna meet up..Christmas Eve maybe...?

C0micB00kL0v3r: I’d  really like that. Have you heard of Lulas?

B0$$B0y_420: Who hasn’t? They got the best pancakes known to man lol.  7pm?

C0micB00kL0v3r: I’ll have my book with me, you know the one I told you about.

B0$$B0y_420: Blankets..yea. That shit was deep. You should make one of those paper flowers you told me about..

C0micB00kL0v3r: Paper flowers? You mean Origami. Yea ok lol. So 7pm, I’ll be there with my book and a paper rose smh. #Gay

B0$$B0y_420: Lmao :).  #SuperGay #ItsADate

Mickey let out a deep breath and set his phone on the table. He was in it now. It’s a date…

Chapter Text

Ian eyes lingered on the over the ornament in his hand. His mother was beautiful. Her smile was like sunshine warming anyone she met. The little ornament made from popsicle sticks held his favorite memory of that smile. The day she took him to his first club. They had drinks and danced together, taking selfies all night. Monica was always the life of the party. She was wild and free. She opened Comics & Characters on an impulse, but it turned into much more. It became her sanctuary from the outside world. Under that roof she was Monica Gallagher the Comic book queen, bringer of adventures and giver of cookies. He missed her, god did he miss her.

He was losing money with each passing day. His regulars frequented less, and everywhere he looked he saw people carrying black and white bags from Milkovich Graphics and Gifts.

Kara Kelly, one of his favorite authors had deserted him too. His store was her go to for promoting her comics but not this year. She jumped ship to Mickey like everyone else. He thought that with their reputation and what he thought was a connection with the community they would stay true to him, help him stay alive. He was wrong. Like sheep they flocked in the masses, to the giant trying to tear down his kingdom. Life really was like a fairytale, only he didn’t think prince charming could save him from this one, no matter how much his words lit up his heart.

C0micB00kL0v3r: You know that song Landslide by Fleetwood mac? One verse keeps playing in my head lately.

“ Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?

Can the child within my heart rise above?

Can I sail through the changin' ocean tides?

Can I handle the seasons of my life?”

Such a lovely song but so sad. It really makes you think about how short our lives are you know, how little time we have to make an impact, leave behind a legacy. My mother, she made an impact. I usually miss her around Christmas but this year I wish she could be here with me. I have so many questions and I could use her advice.

B0$$B0y_420: I’m sure your mother would be proud of you. You’re pretty fuckin amazin. I think you make an impact on people you just don’t know it. You made one on me. Got me stoppin to look at fuckin raindrops man, I don’t do that shit. As for advice maybe I can help? Not the best but…

C0micB00kL0v3r: I wish you could but it’s complicated.

B0$$B0y_420: Whose life isn’t? Come on man, gimme a shot? What’s goin on? Is it love?

C0micB00kL0v3r: Cute but no. My business is in trouble.

B0$$B0y_420:   Fuckin lucky for you. I’m a master at business. It’s what I do best. What kind of business?

C0micB00kL0v3r: Nope. We said no personal details remember not till we meet.

B0$$B0y_420:   Ok. Not a lot to work with but I get it. Can’t really help though cept to say this, when it comes to business you gotta  “Go to the mattresses.”

C0micB00kL0v3r: What??

B0$$B0y_420: It’s from the GodFather. It means you gotta go to war.

C0micB00kL0v3r: What is it with men and the GodFather?

B0$$B0y_420: What??? I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that cause the GodFather is a fuckin classic.

C0micB00kL0v3r: Wow ok then. What? You want me to make them an offer they can’t refuse? Lmao!! See. I know a little...

B0$$B0y_420:  That’s the spirit. Whoever is threatenin your business needs to know you ain't backin down. Show em what you're made of.

C0micB00kL0v3r: I don’t know.

B0$$B0y_420: Nah don’t be a bitch man. You got this, trust me. Just remember it’s not personal, it’s business.

C0micB00kL0v3r: It’s not personal it’s business.

B0$$B0y_420: That’s right. Now go show that fucker who’s boss all right ;)

Ian set his phone on his nightstand and crawled under the covers. He turned to his boyfriend who was reading one of his fitness books. “I was thinking...maybe Adam could write an article.”

“Really?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe, I think it’s a good idea. It could get the word out you know, let people know what’s really happening in this town. It’s time to go to the mattresses.” He tilted his head searching for confusion on Craigs face but the man kept his nose in his book. “You know what that means right? Go to the mattresses?”

Craig laughed and turned a page, “Of course I do babe. It’s from the GodFather.”

Ian rolled his eyes and leaned back against his pillow. B0$$B0y420 whoever and wherever you are, you’re responsible for this. He felt a burst of confidence and pride he thought he’d lost. Oh it’s on Milkovich. This means war.

It’s not personal, it’s business.

***

It  was Christmas Eve and it had been months since Ian saw so many people in his store at one time. Everyone was commenting on how great his mother was and how much they loved his store. It was a staple in the community. Adams article about Big Business threatening small town life and local commerce really did some damage.

Sheila held up the article “And so we do not have to look to usual places where good and evil face off we have the perfect example here on the South Side where the cold cash cow Milkovich Graphics & Gifts threatens a legacy that we have all known and loved for many years. Save Comics & Characters, and keep the history in our town alive.”

He shook his head in disbelief. The article got so much attention he was about to do an interview with channel 2 news. “It’s not personal, it’s business.” That was his mantra as he spoke his feelings about Mickey’s store. He told the reporters that Mickey’s store may be bigger, offer perks and discounts but when it came to quality, Comics & Characters had them beat. Not only in product but in service.

When his interview was over he handed the reins over to Janine. It was 5:30pm, he had 30 minutes to get home. Then he had to decide what to wear. He couldn’t believe the day was finally here. He’d given Matty and Janine the screen name of his date and the location upon their insistence. They were obsessed with thinking he was being catfished or going to be killed and someone would wear his skin. He hoped that wasn’t the case because he didn’t get dressed up for just anybody, he liked his chat friend. He was ready to see what could happen. He’d bounced the idea in his head over the last year, even before he went onto the chat rooms. He loved Craig but he wasn’t in love with him. Who knows maybe B0$$B0y_420 was his shot at love...

***

“That fuckin asshole!” He wiped the sweat from his face and turned up the button on the treadmill. He just finished watching Ian trash talk his store. Sweet and innocent my ass. The horns holdin up his halo were showin now.

“Can’t believe you said that on air Mickey.” Scott sighed and looked at him with a raised brow. “You called your own products cheap man.”

“No!” he pushed pause on the machine and leaned on the arm rail “I didn’t say they were cheap. I did but I said more than that.” He threw his hand up “I said ‘we don’t need high prices. We sell cheap products with the same quality and a social atmosphere. Not just we sell cheap fuckin products stupid fuckin news bullshit.” he took a drink of his water and picked up his phone. It was 5:15pm.

“That Ian Gallagher looks nice, how have you not bought him out yet?”

Mickey laughed “Scotty my friend, looks are fuckin decivin. That guy ain't nice, he’s conniving. Don’t be fooled by those cute little freckles and big green eyes no, don’t underestimate the fuckin guy.”

“Sounds like you like him.”

“What?” He turned off the machine and stepped down taking another swig of water and grabbing a wet wipe. “Nah man. Sure he’s cute and shit but he’s a prick. Plus I got a date tonight.”

Scotty powered down his machine and started to wipe it down. “Really? You’re actually going through with this Mickey?”

“Yea I am. I don’t know man, I just got a good feelin bout this.”

“Uh huh.”

They walked to the locker room and showered. He dried his hair then turned to his friend who was getting dressed. “I got a favor to ask you.”

Scotty pulled his shirt over his head then reached in the locker pulling out his gym bag “And that is?”

“Want you to come with me tonight.”

Scotty set down his bag then turned to stare at him with confused eyes “ You want me to come on your secret affair blind date?”

“Just to see you know. Make sure he’s legit.”

“You mean hot. You want me to spy on him and make sure he’s up to your standards.”

He shrugged his shoulder “Yea man. Just fuckin look through the window for me. That’s it.”

“Fine but you owe me.”

“Whatever. Let’s go. I’ma be late, still gotta stop by the office and get ready.”

Scotty threw his gym bag over his shoulder  “Why the office?”

He gave the man and “are you serious” look waiting for the gravity of his question to sink in.

“Wait..Blake...I get it now.”

He shook his head “oh Scotty. Tonight’s the night. I just know it.”

**

Ian was seated at a table in the center of the restaurant. He wanted to be in plain sight. He decided that for a first date he was just gonna be himself. He was 28 and liked comics. He was a big kid and proud of it. He decided on a denim button up with a red shirt underneath, his skinny black jeans and grey vans. He had his graphic novel in front of him with a black and red origami rose he made from a PC GAMER magazine. He was ready.

*

Mickey stood outside the restaurant “I don’t know man. I’m freakin out. What if he’s not the same in person? What if he completely different. What am I doin. I have to..”

“Whoa Mickey.” Scott grabbed his shoulders. “That’s why you brought me along. I’ll check him out for you just breathe.”

He nodded “go then, i gotta know man. Shits makin me fuckin itchy.”

“All right. I’m on it boss man.” Scotty walked up the stairs to the front entryway of the cafe. He peered in through the window and his eyes went wide. “What did you say he was wearing?”

“Don't know. He’s got a book and some kinda paper rose thing though..”

Scott stepped back and turned to him “He’s cute. Kinda looks a lot like Ian Gallagher..”

Mickey scoffed and crossed his arms “Fuck no he doesn’t. Ian Gallagher is wolf in sheep's clothin. He’s a fuckin dick.”

“Yea but you said he was attractive didn’t you?”

Mickey rubbed at his nose “Yea man. The guys hot but I don’t fuckin like him.”

Scott walked over to him “Well if you don’t like Ian Gallagher I doubt you’re gonna like this guy.”

“Why?”

Scott drew in a deep breath “Cause boss. It is Ian Gallagher.”

He didn’t hear that right? No that wasn’t...how? No fuckin way. He pushed passed his friend then stalked up the stairs and peeked in the window. His eyes scanned the room until they landed on the center table. There, looking eagerly at the door was Ian, graphic novel waiting on the table topped with a beautiful origami rose. “Nope. not doin it.” He ran down the stairs. “Fuck that guy. FUCK!” He clenched his fist. “NO FUCKIN WAY!” God damn it. Fuckin sick fuckin universe. What gives? Who the fuck did he piss off up there to earn this shit huh? “Fuck!” He looked over to his friend. “I need a drink i’m fuckin outta here.”

“Wait Mickey you’re not gonna just leave him are you?”

Mickey laughed because duh. “Why the fuck not? I wanted to know and now I fuckin know. Ian or ComicBookL0ver whatever the fuck he is, they can go fuck themselves. I’m done. D.O.N.E done!” Without another word he stormed off down the street. “Son of a bitch!”

He got two blocks away before he stopped to let the reality of the situation sink in. Why? His little chats and random sentiments were the best part of his day. He’d been talking and having feelings for the man behind the keyboard for almost a year. A FUCKING YEAR! When he came back to Chicago, he met Blake. Then hde reconnected with his family and had to jump into the business role and never leave. He had no time for friends so he went online. That’s where he met..Ian… “Fuuuuck” He leaned against a street lamp. They were the same person. What was he supposed to do with this information? His phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out and scanned over the message feeling a stabbing in his heart.

C0micB00kL0v3r: I hope you’re ok….it’s 7:30. We did say Lulus right? I’d feel like such an idiot if you meant somewhere else. I’m looking forward to meeting you, got on my Sunday best. lol ,not really but...hit me up.

He shoved his phone in his pocket and pinched the bridge of his nose. Ian was the man behind the keyboard. He cared about that person even if he didn’t care for Ian. Fuckin assbackwards logic but what else was there. He could go home and hurt Ian’s feelings, leaving him alone or he could go to his date and offer some company. Who knows maybe C0micB00kL0v3r would come out to play leaving Ian Gallagher at home….He rolled his eyes and pulled a cigarette from his suit pocket. He was all gussied up. You don’t have a name like B0$$B0y and not look the part. “Fuck it.” he lit up his smoke and started back down the street to the restaurant.

*

“More coffee?”

Ian looked up from his phone at the server and politely shook his head “no.” He looked back to his phone. It had been almost an hour since he sent that message. He was hungry but nothing sounded good. He felt like a fool. What was with him and choosing the wrong guys? He couldn’t catch a break. B0$$B0y was supposed to his escape, his light at the end of the tunnel yet here he was, after a month of planning sitting all alone on Christmas Eve. Any other night and maybe it wouldn’t pull at his heartstrings but he told his chat friend how he felt about the holiday this year, how torn up he was about his mom. He assumed the guy picked Christmas Eve so he could listen to him and offer him comfort. So he wouldn’t have to face his failures alone.

“Ian Gallagher...” He looked up with wide eyes to see Mickey Milkovich standing in front of him. “What a coincidence.” Mickey smiled and pulled out the chair across from him “Mind if I sit here?”

Ian scoffed and reached for his things “Yes Mickey I do mind actually. I’m waiting for someone..” He looked around the snake in front of him but only saw a group of carolers walk through the doors.

“You been waitin long?”

“Why do you care? Can you just go please. He’ll be here any minute.”

The server returned to his table “Can I get you something sir?

“No he’s not..”

“Yea man I’ll take a Breve latte with a shot of carmel.” Mickey licked his lips and turned to look at the door then back to him “ So you like this guy?”

Ian tapped his fingers on the table. This was not happening. He was not about to talk boys with the villain in his fairytale. “I do and I would really appreciate if you would leave. Please Mickey just go. Haven’t you ruined my life enough?” Mickey rubbed at his nose then reached out and grabbed his book. “Put that down. You don’t..that’s a limited edition.”

“Oh” Mickey flipped through the pages. “Nice illustrations.”

“How would you know?” He went to grab his book back but Mickey pulled it out of his reach. “Jesus. You have to actually read the thing for any of the artwork to make sense. Give it back.”

“For your information Gallagher. I have read this shit, two times actually. Bet you just love that Raina don’t ya. Bleedin heart just like you am I right?”

He lunged forward and grabbed his book, saving it from Mickey’s evil grip. “For your information Raina was just a normal girl who fell out of love. Not everyone lives happily ever after Mickey.”

Mickey stared back at him then reached for his rose bringing it up to his face and studying it “That why you’re here Gallagher? You lookin for that fairytale endin, searchin for your prince charmin to come and fuckin rescue you?”

“I don’t..I.” Mickey laughed as he continued to twirl his rose in his fingers. “Everything's a joke to you isn’t it Milkovich. Do you care about anything other than yourself?”

“What?” Mickey set the rose down. “Where is your sweet prince anyways hm? Been here 15 minutes now and you were here when I got here. Maybe his white horse took a wrong turn.”

His ears were hot and his heart beat against his chest. “You know what Mickey. You’re wrong. I’m not looking for a prince to rescue me cause i’m not a fucking damsel in distress. As for my date he’s just running late. His phone is probably dead or lost or something.”

Mickey tilted his head and a smirk crept across his face “That right? I’m guessin this date isn’t the leadin expert on health and fitness is he?” Ian averted his eyes at the question. “Not Craig then. Hm well this mystery guy..you gonna be mean to him too?”

That’s it. He was done with this conversation. “No Mickey because unlike you this guy doesn't have a unkind bone in his body.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“I don’t?” He leaned forward and stared at the blue eyed man “I know that your brain is a cash register and your heart is a bottom line. I know that you could care less about the people in this city. All that matters in lining your pockets by destroying the legacy of others. As long as you make money who cares what happens to everyone else.” He smiled and took a drink of his tea. “Wow. For once I was able to say exactly how I feel, and I have you to thank for that.”

Mickey nodded his head “Yup. Congrats. It was the perfect blend of poetry and meanness.”

“I’m not mean Mickey. I only speak the truth it’s not my..”

“Relax Gallagher. I’m just tryin to give you a fuckin compliment.”

“Well I don’t need your compliments. What I need is for you to leave me alone. Go away Mickey. I know my date will be here soon.”

Mickey leaned back in his chair and folded his arms “Yea well I’m here now. So you wanna keep talkin shit or put your big boy pants on and talk like adults hm?”

“Fuck you Mickey” He scoffed and smiled in disbelief locking his eyes on his enemy. “You come in here and sit there with your breve latte and your rolex acting like you’re better than everybody else. You got what you wanted Mickey. You’re taking my store but you can never take the memories. People will remember Comics & Characters and they will remember my Mom because unlike you she cared about people. She loved and people loved her. No one's going to remember you Mickey Milkovich. You’ll come and go like everybody else, because all you care about is money. You’re a mean, selfish, vindictive child who runs on greed and in the end...you’ll be forgotten because you’re not a legacy Mickey, you have no humanity. You’re a walking dollar sign, just another suit.”

He kept his gaze fixed on Mickey’s and was surprised to see his blue eyes falter. Mickey glanced away then back at him and for a brief moment he swore he saw pain behind them. “I think that’s my cue.” Mickey reached into his pocket and pulled out a $20 bill and without another word stood up and walked away.

He sat there for another 20 minutes before deciding he was wasting his time. He shouldn’t have come out, he should be at home with his boyfriend watching some stupid satire comedy on network tv. Instead he was here being stood up by some phantom love he thought he’d found. For all he knows he could have come and gone. He had no idea what his mystery man looked like. He could be the man alone in the booth by the door or maybe he was the guy outside smoking a cigarette when he first walked in. Maybe he saw him and decided this was a bad idea. Maybe he built up this perfect vision in his head then saw him and ran away in disappointment. Whatever the reason, he’d never felt more alone.

Chapter Text

It’s been two weeks. Seven days since Charlie wrote the final check, the small gesture at an attempt to save his soul. At first Ian was reluctant. He held onto his store with everything he could but it was no use. He had no customers, and the longer he stayed open the harder it would be to recover. He didn’t want to be an evil monster. He might have done some fucked up things and yea maybe he was selfish but he still had morals, he still had a heart. Ian wasn’t innocent but he didn’t deserve being left with nothing. He made sure when Charlie wrote this check Ian couldn’t say no. It was way more than his store was worth and enough to give him and his friends some cushion to start over. He’d never say it out loud but Ian broke his heart with those words. The truth hurts.

**

This was it. The end of an era. He walked around his vacant store and felt a piece of him fall away. He was overcome with a sense of emptiness that he didn’t think he would be able to fill. This store was his home. It held the best days of his life in its walls.

He slouched against the wall and felt the salty sting of tears as his eyes welled up. Everyone preached that change was a good thing. That he should welcome it, but he knew better. Change was just another way of saying you failed and now you have no choice but to accept the outcome. That was the truth.

He failed.

He was letting his mom’s store disappear. The sole thing that kept her feet on the ground and gave her a sense of purpose when everything else was falling apart. She held onto it for over 20 years and it only took half that time for him to run it into the ground and eventually iisell out.

He stood up and walked the aisles running his fingers over the wood of the barren shelves. He remember the first time he got a splinter. He was unpacking boxes and helping stock the shelves. He moved to quickly and the shelf bit him. He fell to the floor like any 6yr old and started to cry. His mom came over and scooped him up taking him to his spiderman bench. She sat his down and used her manicured nails to rid his finger off the intrusion then soft lips kissed it making it all better. After that his mom picked up Garfield. It was his favorite. He sat their in her lap and listened to her read until he fell asleep. He wiped his eyes. His missed his Mom. His heart ached for her warm embrace, for her tender kiss on his forehead. He wanted to hear her voice tell him that everything would be ok, because he didn’t believe it. Not anymore. His life was in upheaval. His relationship was a lie and the only two things that were holding him together were gone.

He hadn’t talked to his cyber friend since that night. He didn’t know someone without a face could hurt you the same as anyone else. He needed a friend, his mom, anyone who would listen. His family was wonderful, they were supportive but they always blamed his emotions on his Bipolar. It was hard for him to be sad or angry around them unless he wanted to be berated with questions.

He was lying to himself. When he went into that chatroom it wasn’t to talk shop. It was to make a friend. To find someone who he could be completely honest with who wouldn’t judge his every decision. Someone like B0$$B0y…..why did he stand him up? Honest he could get over it, meeting was a big step but he ignored him. Every message that night went unanswered. That is what hurt the most. They’d been talking for almost a year, everyday. They shared hopes, dreams, and laughs together. What if something happened to him? He was craving something. Wanting someone to hold his hand and guide him through this dark time, incidently, his wayward stranger was the at the top of the list. He should try again. The worst thing that could happen would be nothing.

**

He sat at his desk flipping through a stack of papers. He was on his way to the top. There was no more competition, at least on this side of town. He should be over the moon but there was something eating at him.

C0micB00kL0v3r.

He missed seeing those messages when he woke up in the morning. He liked the way a few simple words could carry him through his day and keep a smile on his face. If we are being perfectly honest, it made sense that Ian and C0micB00kL0v3r were one in the same. He would have never suspected but now that two and two had been pieced together,  it was blindingly obvious. When he first met Ian at his store months ago he felt something. The way he carried himself, the way he spoke, he had him captivated until he trashed his business. That was the moment it all changed and he was reminded of the battle he needed to win. That didn’t stop Ian from being mesmerizing, in fact the small bit of affection he had for the red haired man only seemed to fuel his desire to conquer. Ian hurt his feeling before he even knew they were there. He didn’t get offended easily, but the first and last encounter with the man left him feeling like less of a man. Now that the battle was one, he felt worse. He needed Ian to know he wasn’t this tyrant he was painted as. He was South Side. So he made something of himself...isn’t that everybody’s dream? The American dream? Why was he being persecuted for it? He took all the appropriate steps to avoid ruining people's lives. He offered buyouts. In the end they were his competition and he worked too hard to let his store fail. Why couldn’t people see it like that? That’s right, he was an asshole. Maybe if he walked around smiling with a kitten on his shoulder people would be more forgiving but he was Mickey Milkovich. He was a fighter, he didn’t back down and he demanded respect. He earned it. Why couldn’t Ian see that? He wasn’t just a suit. He was as much a person trying to navigate this crazy world as he was.

Bzz bzz bzz

He glanced over to his nightstand where his phone was charging. It was 11:45pm. Who would be messaging him at this time? Blake was passed out on sleeping pills and Scotty knew better. He sighed and stood up from the desk. He walked over to his phone and unlocked the screen. His mouth went dry when he saw the red 1 above his messenger app. He set his phone down and walked away. He was sure he had a brownie mix somewhere. He needed something sweet, something decadent to distract him from whatever was lingering on his phone.

An hour later, 2 brownies deep and full from one large glass of milk he felt satiated. He loved chocolate. He needed to add an extra 15 minutes on the treadmill but he didn’t care. He walked back into his room and like nothing had happened, like he’d never left, he was drawn to his nightstand. He picked up his phone unlocking it and stared at his screen. He clicked open the app and read  inbox 1. No. He set his phone down then grabbed his keys. He needed a drink, maybe that would let him forget. He grabbed his keys and headed to the door where he was met with big brown eyes.

“Hey there Bax.” He crouched down and pet his dog receiving a lick in the face. The dog stared at him and it was as if he knew. “Don’t look at me like that man. You don’t understand.” Baxter tilted his head and he scratched behind his ear. “I can’t do it. Aint right” he replied. “Look at me Baxter. I’m goin fuckin crazy huh? Huh boy.” He stood up and stared down at his dog, those big eyes seeing through him. “Fuck fine. Just stop with the guilt trip.” He tossed his keys on the kitchen table and walked into his room and over to his nightstand. He unlocked his phone again and with reluctance he opened his message.

C0micB00kL0v3r: I thought about deleting this app. Pretending like you never existed, then I thought about how much I miss you now. If I deleted this app, who knows if I’d find you again. I know things moved fast, too fast and meeting was probably too soon. I get that, I really do but...I thought you were my friend? Why did you blow me off? You just ignored me like I was nothing to you. If that’s the truth then I’ll accept it and move on but if there’s any other reason then I’m willing to listen.

His fingers missed the memo sent from his brain. His brain was screaming put the phone down. Just walk away but his fingers, they had a mind of their own.

B0$$B0y_420: You’re not nothin to me. I’m sorry I blew you off. Somethin came up and I had no choice.The thought of meeting you was one of the few things gettin me through a tough time but ...my lifes too crazy now. I’m sorry.

*

Ian’s eyes traced over the words on the screen. Whatever happened to his friend he understood. He knew how life surprised you with chaos and ruin when you least expected it. He was just happy for a reply. He didn’t need anything else.

C0micB00kL0v3r: Don’t apologize. I get it, I really do. Life has a way of sneaking up on you and knocking you down. I’m happy you’re ok. Not to be cliche but I was worried about you lol. #Gay

*

Mickey laughed feeling that smile only these conversations could bring spread across his face.

B0$$B0y_420: You were worried bout me? Why when there are so many other things to worry about? More important things..

*

Ian scoffed. “More important?” He shook his head wanting to shake the man on the other end of his phone.

C0micB00kL0v3r: More important than the one person on this great big ball of gas that seems to keep me grounded? Nope. You’re kind of at the top of the list. I missed you. I needed you when my world collapsed. Just you. Now you’re here and it already feels like the sun might come out again. Might...

*

He walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch stretching out his legs. He hated the heaviness in his heart. Ian was in pain and he was the cause, but now he was given the unique chance to try and mend what he’d broken.

B0$$B0y_420: Don’t kid yourself man. You’re stronger than you realize, you got a fierceness about you. I can tell. You say your world collapsed, are you gonna try and rebuild it? What are you gonna do?

*

Ian wiped at his eye as a single tear escaped.

C0micB00kL0v3r: If only it were that easy. I lost my business, my moms business. The one thing that kept me connected to her memory. When I hung that closed sign, it was like losing her all over again. I know there’s other jobs, other opportunities out there. I’ll find one, but there’s a hole in my heart now, and I don’t know if I can fix it.

*

Mickey drew in a deep breath. Maybe he was the monster. He took a beautiful, inspiring person and reduced them down to this. A lost soul with a hole in their heart.

B0$$B0y_420: I know it doesn’t change anythin but I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you feel that way. I wish I could fix it for you. You did everythin you could, you stood your ground. Not your fault if it was pulled out from under you. Don’t let this destroy you. You’re unique, sweet and strong. You’re one of the nicest people I’ve ever talked to, you can get through this.

Ian smiled and laid his head on his pillow. Maybe there was hope. He didn’t understand how a few sentiments from a complete stranger could start to patch up his delicate heart but they did. He set his phone down and closed his eyes. He could get through this.

Chapter Text

Ian’s woke up with one thought on his mind. He wanted to run. Everything was crazy, he felt himself slipping and the fresh air and soothing ache in his joints and his feet bounced off the pavement seemed the best remedy. He took a shower and changed into a tank top and shorts. He grabbed his iPod and put on his workout playlist. Now his body and mind were buzzing and he was ready to do this. He jogged down his steps and then one foot in front of the other he ran. He breathed in the smells of the city as he dodged around people making his way to wherever he feet would take him.
His heart was pounding against his chest, and his legs felt like noodles. It had been too long since he just let go and ran. He crouched down to catch his breath breathing in for 3 and breathing out for 4 until his heart slowed down. He stretched his arms then took turns stretching his legs. He was good to go. He ran several more blocks before stopping again. This time he wasn’t short of breath, the air had been taken from him.

His eyes narrowed as he stared at the offending building looming in front of him. He had been battling the urge to turn and bolt down the street. Instead, he walked up to the door.

He could do this.

It was just a bookstore. That’s it. Well...not really. It was the bookstore that put him out of business and crushed his reality, spinning his world on its axis. He owed it to himself to find out what all the hype was about.

He walked in expecting to see a room filled with inattentive robots but instead, he was greeted by smiling faces.
Hmm...
Anyone could smile, that didn’t mean they knew what they were doing.

He strolled over to what looked like a lounge area. There were people sitting with their computers, some with books all relaxing on couches and reclining chairs. The coffee bar was filled with teenagers and college students gossiping. As he looked around he felt the disdain he carried towards this “big box store” slowly slip away. People seemed to be enjoying themselves.

So maybe he didn't hate it like he did when this adventure started but it still stung to see his regulars, his customers sitting there instead of where the belonged, with him. He continued his venture. He browsed through the aisles taking note of familiar titles, some that were hard to find. You’d have to have a passion for comics to know them. He didn't expect that. Mickey didn't seem like the type. He seemed like he knew one thing through and through, money.

He was approaching the staircase when his eyes went wide. There at the bottom was a bookshelf and in the middle was a fish tank. A freaking fish tank...He wasn’t sure what to think about that. At first glance, it seemed like overkill, but as he stood there gazing upon the multitude of colors painting the water he felt a calm flow through his body.

After several minutes he was able to tear himself away and headed up the stairs. He looked around and his heart sank.

It was beautiful.

There were character ink prints framed on the wall and the benches looked like comic book pages. He sauntered over and smoothed his finger over the wood. The texture was smooth and polished under the pads of his fingers yet with the unique craftsmanship it appeared to be homemade. One more thing in the list of unexpected.

He plopped down in a giant bean bag letting his body and his experience sink into the soft material. The place was great, amazing even. Every idea and assumption he had in his head about the store had been erased.

So why was he so disappointed?

It could be that he wanted to be right... He wanted to see a harsh, cold environment, a cookie cutter mega bookstore like he was told, but instead, it was warm and inviting. He wished the selection was lacking but to his surprise, it was the opposite, filled with titles he himself collected.

He didn't understand. If this place was such a godsend why did Mickey have to be such a tool? This was his store after all. How could someone house this much creativity and also so much spite at the same time? He threw his head back and stared at the ceiling. This was too much for one day. On the one hand, he was happy he saw the store, but there was a nagging voice in his head telling him he should have stayed tucked in his bed at home. He closed his eyes trying to block out that voice when he overheard a customer requesting When the Past is a Present. To say he was surprised they didn't carry it was an understatement. Why have such a complex selection but not stock the popular titles? Sure he was a collector, but a store isn’t to serve your own personal needs, it's for the customer. The salesman was struggling to try to find the title and it was embarrassing to watch, he had to step in.

“It’s the Amelia Rules series” he spoke softly. “By Jimmy Gownley. You should be able to order them in a box set, that's what I carried.” The salesman thanked him and brought his customer over to the information desk. Well...that’s enough for one day. That small moment was enough to place him back in his downward spiral, his quiet apartment was sounding better with each breath.

There was only one problem to fix before he could fully relax. It wasn’t really a problem more like….an inconvenience. He’d been tossing the idea around over the last few months but now that he was starting over the realization was blinding.

Craig.

What were they even doing? They had nothing in common and to be honest the guy was a bore. He was always talking about the newest fad diet and trying to feed him weird concoctions. If it didn’t involve health, he didn’t want to hear it.

Don’t get him wrong, Craig had his good qualities too. They just seemed more like qualities for a friend rather than a partner. He pulled out his phone and shot Craig a text to meet at the coffee shop by his apartment.

He stirred his coffee waiting eagerly for his boyfriend..whoops, ex-boyfriend to arrive. After about 15 minutes Craig was pulling out the chair across from him.

“Thanks for meeting me” He reached out and touched the man’s hand. “We need to talk.”

Craig pulled his hand back and took a sip of his Americano. “I think I know what you want to talk about Ian so I’m going to go ahead and tell you it’s ok. I understand.”

Ian laughed and glanced at the table before looking up at the man. “I’m not sure you quite understand Craig. I think we should take a break. I love you, I really do but more like a really good friend. I don’t see this going any further for us.”

Craig crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair a smirk on his face. “I agree 100%, Ian. I was waiting for the moment to bring it up but you beat me to the punch.”

“Really? You’re ok with this? We can still be friends?”

“Of course. You’re a great guy Ian but it’s just not the right fit.” Craig stood up from the table. “I’ll have my stuff out this afternoon. You going to your sisters today? I can do it then.”

Ian scratched his neck. He was happy at how smooth the conversation went but a little off put by it at the same time. He didn’t know the feelings were mutual..all this time wasted. “Uh, yea. I’m just gonna drop in and have lunch so that should be fine, you can leave the key on the nightstand.”

“Great!”

**

Mickey held his jacket over his head as the rain poured down. He and Blake had just gone down the street for dinner and cocktails when the storm hit. Blake bein the diva he was didn’t want to wait for the rain to stop because his show was about to start. Seriously who decides to walk 5 blocks in a fuckin rainstorm just so they don’t miss The Real Housewives of Atlanta? He wasn’t even a fuckin housewife. Never would be.

“So you know that Ian Gallagher you put out of business?”

Mickey rolled his eyes as they crossed the street. “Yup.”

“Weeell” Blake clicked his tongue. “I’m thinking about hiring him. He knows so much about comics, children's specifically.”

“Books and Comic Books are different man.”

Blake scoffed “Don’t be so dense Mickey. He knows what kids look for, he would be a great addition to the marketing team. Maybe once he has a job again you can stop sulking around like someone pissed in your cheerios.”

He stopped outside their apartment building. “The fuck did you just say?”

“Don’t get that tone with me, Mister.” Blake shoved his umbrella at Raul the doorman as they walked inside. “You mope around here like you weren’t the one that signed, sealed and delivered the death of that store. It’s annoying.”

“You know what’s fuckin annoyin?” He licked his lips and rubbed at his nose. “The sound of your fuckin voice. Can you at least pretend not to be a fuckin bitch for 5 minutes, that’s all I’m askin. 5 minutes without you suckin the life out of the room with your fuckin bitterness.” He heard a snicker from Raul as they walked onto the elevator. “What makes you think he’d wanna work for you anyway huh?”

Blake laughed and leaned against the wall “What other choice does he have? It’s not like he has a college degree.” His lips curled up into a sneer “I guess he could probably work at McDonald's. Would that be a better alternative Mickey?”

“Blake I’m so fuckin.” he paused. “What the..” He gripped the rail going around the wall as the elevator lurched then came to a dead stop. “No please..come the fuck on.”

“Fantastic.” Blake scoffed then looked at him “Well do something!”

He shrugged his shoulders and turned to see Raul unlocking the panel and pulling out a red emergency phone. “I’ll take that.” He grabbed the phone from Raul who appeared happy to pass over the responsibility.

“911 what’s your emergency?”

“Uh yeah we’re at the EnV lofts on West Kinzie and the elevator broke down. There’s uh” he looked around “There are 5 people.”

“Ok, Sir please just remain calm. We’ll get a team out there to assist you as soon as we can, maybe 30-45 minutes, in the..” Blake snatched the phone from him.

“You need to get someone out here NOW! What do we pay you people for? This is an emergency I can’t wait 45 fucking..”

“Holy fuck!” He shoved his boyfriend away. “Thank you for your time. We’ll be here.” He hung up the phone then sank down on the wall next to Raul.

“Maybe they’ll move faster. I have to watch my show. Not to mention Izzie needs to be walked and I’m sure she’s made a mess of things.”

He rubbed at his brow feeling mentally exhausted. He didn’t even try a comeback. It was a fuckin cat. She would be fine. He threw his head back and closed his eyes waiting for this nightmare to be over so he could go home and prepare for the next one.

“When we finally get out of here I’m going to get frozen yogurt.” He opened his eyes to see the women holding a suitcase sink down to the floor. He heard a whimper and released it wasn’t a suitcase at all, it was a carrier. “I’ve never had it before. Always thought about it but now I’m going straight to Menchies and I’m gonna see what the fuss is all about.”

“Si” Raul nodded. “It’s very good. When I get out of here I’m going to ask my girl to marry me.”

“Aww” the women cooed.

Raul turned to him and pulled out his wallet “This is Marisol.” He showed him a picture of a woman in a bright yellow dress with a wide smile and curly black hair. “She’s been asking me for years if I will marry her. She’s the one I was just scared you know of commitment but life’s too short.”

Mickey nodded his head. “How do you know she’s the one though.”

“Something you just know Mr. Milkovich. I can tell when I look at my Marisol that I want to spend my life with her.”

Blake laughed “When I finally get out of here I’m opening up a Pellegrino and watching my reality show, or what’s left of it.” His boyfriend turned to him “I told you we should have left earlier but no. You had to had to get that slice of meringue pie. Honestly, Mickey, I don’t know how you can eat like that and expect me to stay with you when you balloon up. It’s a good thing you have money so you can get it all sucked out when it happens. It will happen, Mickey, you…..”

He put Blake on autotune. There was a good person deep DEEP down, a sexy person even but he was long gone. He licked his lips then looked over at Raul then back at Blake. If he had to trapped in an elevator with one other person who would he chose? It was obvious but he’d tried to ignore it. The fact that they still talked on a daily basis wasn’t helping his cause. It would be Ian Gallagher. It would always be Ian. “You’re right Raul, life’s too short.”

***

He thought he’d stayed away long enough but when he pulled up Craig was loading the last of his boxes into his truck. He gave him a friendly smile but didn’t stop to talk. There was no need, everything had been said. He shut the apartment door and peered out the window watching until his ex pulled away and out of his life.

He walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottled water from the fridge. He closed the door and leaned his back against it staring out into his seemingly empty apartment, his eyes constantly drifting back to the small pile of dishes in his sink. What the heck. He was gonna take a nap but fuck it, he could do a little tidying up first. He slammed down his water and tossed the bottle into the recycle bin before approaching the sink.
He turned on the faucet and poured soap on his sponge then began to wash. First the plates, then the bowls and glasses, finishing with the silverware. When he was done he towel dried each dish placing them in the perspective spot in his cupboards. He’d only put away the plates and bowls when he stopped. There in front of him was a dirty glass. It has smudges on it. He took it out and held it to the light. Yup. It was dirty. He rubbed at his forehead feeling a nagging feeling. If this was dirty then everything must be dirty right? He started pulling out his glasses and set them on the counter, this was followed by his bowls and plates and even his silverware.
“What a mess.” He decided then and there he had to rewash everything to make absolutely sure. He filled up his sink and started to scrub vigorously at the glass, washing it, drying it then washing it again just to be sure. He repeated this cycle determined to make sure everything ended up clean and in his place. He needed things to be in their place or else it would just be chaos and he didn’t need any more chaos in his life. He just ended a long-term relationship with someone who was happy to jump ship and his business was long gone. His life was spinning out of control...but not his kitchen. Once he was done with the dishes he would tackle the oven, it been too long, then maybe the floor. No, definitely the floor. When he was done his kitchen would be sparkling clean and then who knows. If his kitchen was a picture of perfection then maybe he should clean the rest of his apartment. He had too much clutter anyways, it was taking over his apartment his life. He just wanted things to be clean, organized and in their proper place, it wasn’t a big deal. He turned and looked at the dishes stacked on his counter. It would probably take him 2 hours to wash and dry everything. Then he’d have to run to the store and buy cleaner for the oven...maybe he could use regular soap if he scrubbed hard enough, that would only take a couple hours too. Fuck Mickey, Fuck Craig, and his family could get off his back. He had everything under control, he didn’t need anyone. He just needed to clean.

Chapter Text

Mickey blinked his eyes open to the dark room. He rolled on his side and before he knew it he was tumbling down to the floor.

“Motherfucker!” He stood up from the cold ground and collected his bearings. His twin sized bed in his childhood home was a far cry from the condos California king, however, anything was better than spending one more minute with that harpy Blake Thomas.

After his little stint in the elevator he decided his life was fuckin hectic enough without adding on a toxic, dead end relationship with a self absorbed douchebag. He broke up with Blake and in turn needed to buy a new dish set seeing as plate after plate had been hurled at his head as Blake chased him out of the apartment.

It had been a week since he moved back into his old room, in his old house with his brothers and little sister. It was only temporary. He would find another place soon but to be honest being around his family again and being South of the yards, smokin joints and kickin it, made him feel like his old self. He was feeling like the Mickey Milkovich who didn’t shop by thread count, and have a watch worth more than the average person's rent. You could take him out of the ghetto and give him a fancy car but it was a relief to know you couldn’t take the ghetto out of him. He was proud of his roots. He might parade around with money in his pocket and business on his mind but in the end he would always be the boy from the wrong side of the tracks. He was more than a suit.

He sat down on the bed and looked at his phone. His lips curled up in a smile when he saw the bright red #7 above his messenger app.

He opened the app and clicked on his inbox. He furrowed his brow when he noticed all the messages were from the last 15 minutes. It was 4am. He didn’t want to be awake so why the fuck was Ian up so early??

C0micB00kL0v3r: You ever wonder about the Universe? Like how it all began? Was it god who created it or were we just some cosmic anomaly from the Big Bang?

C0micB00kL0v3r: I wonder if we’re really alone out there. It’s so vast, it’s kind of selfish to not believe in aliens. That’s like saying the only country in the world in the United States. Have you been out of Chicago? Have you traveled? I’ve never traveled but I really want to. I think about how small we are in this universal machine and it seems a shame to not venture outside of our own little world. Think about how many different cultures and languages are out there? Do you speak another language? I’m trying to learn German but it’s a hard dialect to master and there are a lot of ways to say the same word. I’ve learned some basics though. I want to go to Berlin. How cool would that be? I think it would be awesome. Not as awesome as space though. How cool would it be to be an astronaut?

Mickey re-read over the message 3 times trying to follow Ian’s train of thought. It was like he had so many ideas it was hard for him just to focus on one. If he didn’t know any better he’d think he was on meth of somethin. Why else would he be up so early talking about 4 different things at once? He took in a deep breath then nervously clicked on the next message.

C0micB00kL0v3r: Coffee or Iced T? I like tea personally but not hot only iced. I only like certain hot drinks and hot chocolate is my favorite. You know what goes good with hot chocolate? Apple pie and vanilla ice cream. Chocolate ice cream is good too but Vanilla is my favorite. Ice cream or frozen yogurt? Have you even tried frozen yogurt? It’s insane and delicious. I don’t like yogurt though which is funny. Did you know yogurt is a living organism? Just like you and me. There was this time in highschool we took samples on a petri dish and studied it and yep. ALIVE. Lol. I guess that’s why they are called active cultures. You think they eat yogurt in other places or is it an American thing? You think they eat it in Germany? OH MY GOD….do you think they eat in in space?

Ok. Something was definitely up. Ian was always philosophical but this was on another level.

C0micB00kL0v3r: I have waaay too much clothes. Who would've thought one guy could have this much crap?

C0micB00kL0v3r: Aww I found my yearbook. I was such a ginger

C0micB00kL0v3r: I’m still a ginger but I don’t look like Raggedy Andy...not anymore lol

C0micB00kL0v3r:  Look at this sunset

Mickey rolled his eyes. It was too early for this whirlwind of conversation and Ian was worrying him. Why was he up and why was he so...boom boom boom with his messages? It seriously was like he was on something. It wouldn’t be a surprise cause his life was flipped upside down thanks to him but Ian didn’t seem the type. He rubbed at his nose and ran his finger over the keyboard on the screen.

B0$$B0y_420: Yea...that’s real nice man.

C0micB00kL0v3r: You’re awake!!

C0micB00kL0v3r: Isn’t it? I took it myself. I love how the colors mix together. It’s almost like a watercolor painting right? Do you like to paint? Sometimes I do but mostly I like to take pictures. Wanna see another one?

Wait? He took this picture? So he was outside at almost...4am.

B0$$B0y_420: I gotta get a few more hours in before the day starts. You should too. You sleep at all?

C0micB00kL0v3r: Nope. Not tired. That’s ok though. I’ll take some more pictures and you can look at them later. Xo

C0micB00kL0v3r: Ignore that I didn't mean xo, I meant x. No kisses here lol not yet. Goodnight!

His cheeks warmed as a blush crept across them. Hugs & kisses. Hmph..what a fuckin dork. He smiled and lay back against his pillow. Ian Gallagher..what was your story?

B0$$B0y_420: Sure thing man. GO TO BED lol. Xo ;).

He set his phone on his chest and lay the restless. Ian….

After 20 minutes he decided he was a liar. He couldn’t fall back asleep. Ian had stimulated his mind and now all he could do was read and re-read the messages on his phone. Ian was right. The sunset was beautiful and if he took his conversation piece by piece the man had some interesting points, it was the volume and the sparactiness that originally made it hard to decipher. That didn’t change the fact he was concerned. He felt a tug at his heart drawing him to his past nemesis. He hadn’t talked to him since the night at the coffee shop. Charlie had handled all the nitty gritty with the paperwork and the payment. Ian had called him out that night and even though he’d like to say it was all bullshit...it only stung because parts of what the redhead stated were true. He didn’t want to be that guy anymore. “ The Destroyer of Small business” he just wanted to be a legacy, to be remembered and to make his name represent more than the criminal and social poriah it had become.

He took a long hot shower to clear his mind and made the decision. He was going to see Ian. He had too. This morning felt off and he needed to make sure the man wasn’t doing anything stupid. He’d seen too many people lost to tragedy because they were sucked into the web of self destruction.

It took a few weeks but he was able to clearly see Ian as his C0micB00kL0v3r. Ian complaining to him about him was partly why, but more so he thought back on their first interaction. When he took the kids to Cookies & Comics, he was struck dead by the way Ian’s smile lit up the room as he read his Garfield comic strip. He felt nervous and his hands beaded with sweat when Ian looked up at him with his sparking green eyes as he talked with his Uncle and Son. It was a domino effect of affection he’d never felt before.  Ian talked to him at the register about his passion for comics and his legacy of the store, and though he knew deep down it would end in tears, for just a brief moment he felt what could only be described as the cliche’.

Love at first sight.

He’d only felt that warmth in his heart one other time. The way Ian smiled made him feel the same fuzzy feeling as when Comic Book lover talked about the world, the way he made him appreciate the little things. Ian & C0micB00kL0v3r were the same and at first it broke his heart. He had no chance with Ian. None.

He had been the villain in Ian’s fairytale.

Then he realized he was being to hard on himself. Before he knew the truth he was Ian’s white Knight, his prince guiding him through the battlefield. He helped him tend to his wounds and congratulated him on his victories. He cared for Ian every second even when he was the one causing him pain. If he could get past the situation and look at the person, the man behind the keyboard, maybe Ian could too.

Maybe they stood a chance…

**

.The sky was snow white and the wind was biting at his face as he stood there staring at the door holding a box of sugar cookies and a cup holder with two cups of hot chocolate. He didn’t have a plan but, who could say no to cookies and hot chocolate? He took in a deep breath and pressed the buzzer.

“Hello? I..if you’re selling anything I don’t want it.”

There was a panic in Ian’s voice that he found amusing. He almost claimed to be the Avon lady but it was cold and he could barely feel his fingers. He laughed “Na man it’s me. Mickey….Mickey Milkovich.” There was a long pause and he was leaning in to press the button on the intercom when he heard the static. Ian was still there. “It’s fuckin cold out here Gallagher. Let me up.”

“I..I can’t. Go away Mickey. I don’t wanna talk to you and..and my apartment is a mess. I’m cleaning and you..why are you even here? I don’t want you here. Just leave me alone.”

He deserved that but as Ian spoke his worry was creeping back in. “Just let me talk...just 5 minutes. That’s all I want I..” He stopped when he saw a woman and her two sons approaching the door.

“My bad.” He smiled and backed away from the door. The women returned the gesture then entered in a code and opened the door. She held it for her her boys but he was nice enough to take over. She thanked him then walked down the hall to her apartment. The universe was on his side today. He shut the door behind him and walked over to the elevator.

When he stepped off on the 3rd floor he felt all the confidence drain from his body. This was a bad idea. Ian had made it clear he wanted nothing to do with him. He only felt this way about Ian because he knew the truth. What if Ian found out and hated him even more? Was having Ian as Ian worth losing the soulmate he had found in C0micB00kL0v3r?

“Fuck..” He shook the thoughts from his head and collected himself. They were the same. If he wanted one he would get the other. He walked up to Ian’s door and knocked. Several seconds later the door opened.

“What do you want Mickey?” Ian’s hair was sticking up on his head and he was scratching at his neck. “I..I told you, I have nothing to say to you. You’re wasting your time so just please...leave me alone. I don’t want you hear. GO!”

Ian looked tired yet his words came out fast. “I uh..” he cleared his throat “I get it but I came bearin gifts.” He held out his hands showing Ian the goodies he brought. The redhead looked at him suspiciously. “It’s just hot chocolate.” He opened the lid letting the smell of chocolate and melted whip cream waft into their noses then took a small sip. “Not tryin to pull one over on you. Just wanted to see how you were doin you know..with..”

“With you ruining my life?”

Ian snatched the cookies from him and turned around leaving the door open. He followed and gently shut the door. He walked over to the kitchen and stopped, his eyes darting around the apartment. It was a wreck. There were piles of clothes on the couch and smaller piles on the floor. There were magazines next an empty box and stacks of papers next to empty file folders. Everything was everywhere..

“You just move in or…”

Ian grabbed his hot chocolate and handed him a paper plate with a cookie before walking over to the couch. “No. Why? I’ve lived here 10 years. This uh..this is just  I needed to do it ok. It was messy and I have so much stuff, and I needed it to be organized.” The redhead shoved a cookie in his mouth and chewed silently as his eyes scanned the room, moving back and forth over the chaos.

He walked over to Ian after seeing an empty spot on the couch. “For sure man.” He set his drink and plate down on the table careful not to disrupt the pile of...receipts? He peeled off his jacket and tossed it over the back of the couch.

“NO!” Ian jumped up and grabbed it. “What are you...you can’t just put your stuff anywhere Mickey Jesus!” Ian gestured around the room. “Everything has a place ok. This is for long sleeves shirt a..and this” he pointed to what looked like the same pile but clearly he was wrong. “This is for short sleeved shirts.” Ian continued to explain the piles. He had one for belts, shoes, socks, short, jeans, dress pants…

“I get it” He interrupted Ian. “Where do you want me to put this?” He held up his jacket and raised a brow.

Ian scoffed. “Weren’t you listening Mickey” Ian grabbed it from his hands and walked over to what used to be chair but now was a mound of jackets. “Here. It belongs here. It’s safe here in its spot.” Ian stalked back over and sat down grabbing his hot chocolate. The redhead looked at him and shook his head. “This is wrong. You can’t be here Mickey. I have to clean and  can’t focus with you here.”

He wasn’t sure what to say. He was not expecting this. Ian’s eyes weren't dilated. He wasn’t on anything so what was goin on? He didn’t want to leave, especially after seeing how Ian reacted with his jacket. He swallowed thickly and glanced around the room. His eyes stopped on something shiny peeking out from the bottom of Ian’s coffee table. He reached down and pulled out a small binder. It was covered in grey glitter and there were superhero stickers decorating its border. “What this?”

Ian looked at the book then grabbed it from his hand “This is a photo album.” The man cleared his throat and he could see the twinkle of tears in his eyes. “My mom..she uh...she made it for me.” Ian stood up from the couch “It doesn’t belong there it belongs here.” Ian walked over to his book shelf and slid the book in his spot. He watched as Ian scanned over the other books then before he knew it books were being pulled off and stacked on the floor and Ian was mumbling about it being all wrong.

“Whoa there Cinderella.” He made his way through the maze of clothes and over to the bookshelf. “One thing at a time man, you don’t gonna fuckin organize everythin at once.”

“Yes I do because if I don’t then it won’t be complete. What would be the point if I did some and not all of it.” Ian sank down to the ground and  started to sort out his books.

Mickey  looked around the room then down at Ian and let out a frustrated sigh. Whatever was going on with Ian scared him but he couldn’t leave. He felt something for the man mumbling and sorting on the floor and right now that man needed him..even if he didn’t want him. He crouched down beside Ian and folded his legs. He picked up an book “Where does this one go?”

Ian pointed to a spot on the shelf next to the photo album. He didn’t get a chance to look at the album before Ian put it up which was disappointing. He wanted to know more about the man next to him. He pulled his lip between his teeth then as he set the book in it’s proper spot he moved quickly and “accidently” knocked the album off the shelf. “Shit sorry! Here let me..” he leaned down and picked up the book that had landed upside down face open. He flipped it over to see a cute freckled face boy maybe 8 years old with a goofy grin that lit up the page. He smiled and looked at Ian “is that you?”

Ian grabbed the book and held it in his lap a wide grin spreading across his face. “Yea.. that’s me. I was a...”

Mickey laughed and snatched the book from his hands “ a real life raggedy Andy..” he looked over at Ian who was taken back by what he said. “I mean look at ya Gallagher. The little hat and that shirt..”

“Shut up” Ian shoved him then stole his album back flipping through the pages…

“Wait” he reached out and flipped back a few pages “Is that your mom?”

Ian nodded and his eyes softened as a faint smile lingered on lips “Yeah. Thats...that’s my mom.” He smoothed his thumb over the page and sniffed. “She was one of a kind you know? This was her re-marrying my stepdad.” Ian laughed “That night was crazy. She was really sick and uh.. She just wanted us to come together one more time. I almost didn’t come I was so mad at her.”

Mickey raised a brow. All he’d ever heard were good things about Monica. “What she do?”

Ian licked his lips “She was the only one who knew how it felt to be me and I guess I blamed her. If she didn’t uh..” he cleared his throat. “It’s stupid I know but I thought it was her fault I was having issues. One day I was on top of the world, doing good in school, ready to move onto senior year then the next….” Ian trailed off then looked up at him, his eyes drenched with silent tears. “I’m really glad I did go. It was the last time I saw her. She had brain cancer and died from an aneurysm a few days later..”

“Ian I’m sorry.” He reached out his hand and set it on Ian’s leg smoothing his thumb, trying to offer even the slightest comfort. He looked down at the photo of Monica and Ian’s stepdad dancing. “You have her smile you know. She has this glow about her...you have that too.” Ian met with his eyes and for a moment he felt like he did that day. His heart was pounding in his ears and his throat was dry. Ian’s eyes were laced with tears making them shimmer like emeralds. He leaned in “You’re unique Ian Gallagher,” he said softly.

Ian’s hand moved over his and he leaned in until they were close enough to feel the heat from each others breath. “I’m not” Ian whispered. “I’m a failure.” Ian pulled back and closed the book. “My mom…” He laughed softly and placed the book on the shelf. “She was special.” Ian turned to him “I..I have to clean Mickey. I..I can’t..I told you to leave.” Ian jumped up from the ground and walked swiftly over to a the pile of shirt on the couch and began frantically going through them but he seemed to have no destination, just moving things for the sake of moving them. He stood up from the ground and cautiously approached the man. “Which ways the bedroom?”

“What? Why?”

Mickey grabbed a shirt from the pile “Unless you wanna just keep movin shit back and forth I’ma grab some hangers and get shit put away.”

“Oh ok...sure.” Ian pointed down the hall.

“Sweet thanks.” He started to walk to Ian’s bedroom when he noticed it was eerily quiet. He walked through the door and took yet another deep breath. Ian’s room was in as much disarray as the rest of his apartment. That was ok though. He was here and he was not goin anywhere until Ian could rest comfortable knowing everything was in it place. He grabbed the hangers from the closet and walked back into the living room. “You got a smart TV? Like you get YouTube?”

Ian scoffed. “Yea Mick. Why?”

“Cause this” he gestured around the room “is gonna take all day so two things are gonna happen.”

“Really? And what’s that Mickey?”

He smiled and grabbed the remote “Most important you are watchin The Godfather and I don’t wanna hear any complaints.” He looked over to Ian who’s hands were folded across his chest. “Trust me It’s an offer you can’t refuse.”

Ian laughed and sat down next to his pile the hangers sliding into his lap. He grabbed one and  start flicking his nail over the wire “And what’s the second thing?”

“I’m orderin us some fuckin food.” Ian had told him how much he loved Thai food and he knew what he would order. “I was thinkin that little Thai place down the block...could get a chicken bowl and soup or somethin?”

Ian glanced to the ground then slowly back at him “Uh ok. That’s my favorite.”

“I know.” He scolded himself “I mean..who doesn’t like it..”

Ian laughed and he could already see some tension leaving his body. He was still fidgety and his eyes were scanning the room but now they would land on him and it seemed to right things if only for a moment.

Chapter Text

He sat there staring at his phone re-reading the messages he’d sent to

B0$$B0y. He was mortified. He didn’t even remember writing most of it but then again he was manic. It only took a few days of non-stop cleaning and his brother dropping by to have a beer before he realized it...More like until it was pointed out and he was escorted by Lip to his psych to get a med adjustment.

There was one thing he remembered clear as day, manic or not he shouldn’t have let it happen. Mickey.

Mickey Milkovich.

The guy came to his apartment with cocoa...why? He seemed like he just wanted to talk and in that state, he could have cared less as long as he wasn’t distracted. Now though, he can’t shake it. Mickey hung out with him all day. He brought him breakfast then ordered him lunch. He helped him clean and they watched the Godfather...it was like they were friends rather than mortal enemies but he knew and Mickey DEFINITELY knew that wasn’t the case.

He was fully dressed in his black and white shorts with his white tank top. His phone was holstered on his arm and his head was safely covered with a black beanie. He opened the door than he was gone.

He didn't usually have a destination for his runs. Sometimes he would end up at his Brother’s and other times downtown. It depended on where the beat took him. He had a running playlist and after hitting shuffle he would drown out the chaos of the world and sink into his own little bubble. It was strange that at this moment though he couldn’t hear anyone and he seemed to have a one-track mind, that he found the most clarity. He could smell the nectar from the flowers or the freshly cut grass. It was like all his other senses were enhanced, and it made a simple run turn into something magical.

After a good solid mile, he stopped. He should have stayed on the track team in high school, he could be an Olympian by now….maybe not. He was a smoker and it took a hell of a lot longer to run this mile than it did running with the team. He took a deep breath letting his legs adjust to being in a solid standing position. He bent down popping his back then turned to each side touching his toes and letting out several satisfied sighs. It was a good morning. The only thing missing was coffee and conversation.

Coffee black, two sugars, and if he was feeling extra fancy a dollop of whipped cream. It added the perfect amount of sweetness and took the chill from his bones. He sat down at the counter by the window and sipped his coffee, occasion licking at the whipped cream for that much-earned feeling of indulgence. He strummed his fingers impatient with himself. He needed to text B0$$B0y again, but he was too embarrassed. He hadn’t spoken with him since that day. Maybe he scared him off. He hoped that wasn’t the case...He really liked his cyber friend and that was using the smallest sentiment. He could say how he really felt but it scared him just to think about.

Love.

What is love? The question everyone asks themselves. Does he love me? Am I in love? The movies show you the fairy tales, the cliches of love at first sight, the soul mates. Is that really love? What he felt with B0$$B0y could be compared to the way you feel when you see the couple meet at the end of the movie. She doesn’t get on the plane because he’s there waiting at the airport...He objects at her wedding and professes his undying love in front of the world. That tickle in your heart when after watching your favorite show for 3 seasons you favorite characters hold hands or even kiss...that was the feeling he got whenever he saw that red 1 above his messenger app.

The thing about love..(if that was truly what he felt)..is aside from the sunshine and rainbows it was terrifying. What could be worse than having someone brought into your life who made you float on air only to find they’d rather you just walk beside them. What if B0$$B0y was just a normal guy. He could be married with kids and just like having a friend to talk too. He was assuming he was gay but looking back he realized that had never been a topic of discussion. The words never crossed his fingers and most certainly not his cyber friend. It would be just his luck to build this into something it wasn’t. He might front like he has his shit together but the one thing he wanted more than anything was to find that special someone who could not fill but maybe patch the hole in his heart left from his mother and every other failure in his life. Someone to tell him it was ok when the world collapsed in front of his eyes as it had done so many times.

C0micB00k_L0v3r :

Why couldn’t he just do it? He rolled his eyes and shoved his phone back into his pocket.

He finished his coffee and was ready to head home when he felt eyes on him. He turned and no one was behind him. Weird. He turned back to the window and “Jesus” he shouted nearly jumping out of his skin. There laughing and shaking his head in amusement was Mickey. He lips betrayed him offering up a wide grin and a warmth spread through his cheeks.Apparently, that was the same as saying “Come on in..” because within seconds the man looking in was now walking up to him.

“Gallagher” Mickey looked him over as he pulled out a stool and sat down. “Long time no see man. How you feelin?”

He glanced away. It was ironic how embarrassed he felt by text messages yet didn't stop to think Mickey had physically seen him in a full-blown manic episode. “I'm fine, thanks.” He flicked his nails wishing to have some sort of distraction from the piercing blue staring at him.

“You?”

Mickey laughed. “I’m feelin pretty good considerin. My back hurts a little bit but no one ever raved about sleepin on a twin mattress did they.”

He raised his brow in confusion. Mickey was practically a millionaire, why the hell would he sleep on a twin. He must have had said that out loud or his face was in a screwed up position because Mickey rolled his eyes.

“I know, doesn’t fit the picture right? Big bad boss man sleepin on a twin mattress, but it’s not so bad.”

“What happened to the California King?”

“I left it. Thought it was an upgrade but really it was just a lie. Despite what you think you know about me Gallagher, I don’t need all that shit or the baggage that comes with it to be happy.”

He scratched at his neck. It was apparent Mickey wasn’t just saying hi, he looked like he was there to visit… “Uh..can I buy you a coffee?”

Mickey smiled and he felt his breath hitch. He didn’t pay much attention before but now it was dangerously obvious... Mickey was hot as fuck. He was hot in a mysterious kind of way. He seemed to have multiple personalities. The prick who took his business and this person. Down to earth, sleeps on a twin mattress, not dressed to the nines. That was honestly the first thing that he noticed. Mickey was usually in a full monkey suit. Jacket, dress pants, tie. Business all the way. Right now though, he was wearing jeans, a Nirvana t-shirt, and a black leather jacket. He looked human. “I’m gonna get a refill, breve latte right? Shot of...vanilla?”

Mickey’s eyes widened and a small smile crossed his lips before he sucked the bottom one through his teeth leaving him feeling weak in the knees. Snap out of it Gallagher. Enemies. Maybe Frenemies but that was a hard maybe.

“Carmel.”

He stood up with his cup “Breve latte with a shot of Carmel?”

Mickey nodded “Can’t believe you remembered that shit. I can’t remember what I had for lunch yesterday.”

“Hmph well,” Ian averted his eyes. The night had been on repeat in his head. What he said, how Mickey acted just the entire disaster. To top it off, his heart was broken even if it was unintentional. “It was Christmas Eve. Hard night to forget.” He turned and walked briskly over the line and waited for the next available barista.

When he approached he noticed they had cupcakes on display. How did he miss that? He already had his whip cream but something about the frosted confection was drawing him in. Call it emotional eating but he needed it. They were red velvet and devil's food. Two of his favorite flavors. He ordered one of each then grabbed their coffees and walked back to the counter.

“Pick your poison.” He held out the two bags giving Mickey first pick. He shouldn’t be eating it anyway, so it didn’t matter what he got. Mickey snatched the bag from the left and pulled out the devil's food. His face fell. Maybe he did care. He sat down and pulled out his red velvet.

“Wanna trade?”

He looked at Mickey and raised a brow “What? You don’t like devils food? Are you insane?”

“Nah man, it’s good but red velvet is where it’s at.”

Ian set down his cupcake on the napkin and the two exchanged.

“Mm see” Mickey licked the cream cheese from his fingers before taking the first bite “Fuckin legit.”

He laughed and took a bite of his “Jesus” he mused licking his lips and reaching for his coffee. “This is fucking fantastic.”

“You act like you never tasted chocolate before man, what's wrong with you?”

He wiped his face with the napkin and looked at Mickey feeling slightly embarrassed. “I've had Chocolate Mick, I don't live under a rock. I have an apartment and everything.”

“so what's with the mouth-gasm?”

mouth-gasm? That's not even a word.”

Mickey took a sip of his coffee and propped his elbow on the bar ”Actually it is. It's my word. Means mouth orgasm as in the act of sexual stimulation by something you put in your..”

“Ok ok..” he reached out and pressed a finger to Mickey’s lips. “Shut up.” He pulled back and grabbed his coffee. “I just don’t eat sweets and pastries and stuff like that. It's more of a treat.” He laughed at himself “It’s been a long time since I had a cupcake but I don’t know, it felt right. Like I needed it..”

Mickey licked his lips “Did you really just shush me?”

He shoved the brunette playfully “That’s all you got from that conversation?”

“What? So you don’t eat sweets.” Mickey took the final bite of his cupcake and balled up the wrapper. “Just gonna have to change that..” he set the wrapper in front of his fingers then flicked it at him.

”next time we’ll have to go all the way.”

He cocked his head and laughed lightly “um what did you say?”

“I said next time none of this cupcake bullshit man. You and me are gonna eat the king of cakes...cheesecake.”

“You would like cheesecake wouldn’t you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean Gallagher?”

He shook his head and leaned back staring at Mickey. “It means your cheesy.”

“Maybe I am. What of it.” Mickey stood up and held out his hand. “Gimme your phone.”

He furrowed his brow and looked up at the man “And why would I do that Mick?”

Mickey rolled his eyes then reached down and snatched his phone off the counter. “Hey! What….give me.”

The man brought it close to his face then backed away. “Hold your fuckin horses man god damn.” He watched as Mickey typed something. “Stop starin at me like I’m hackin your bank account Gallagher. Just puttin in my number...my cell and uh” he handed him his phone “my office.”

Ian took his phone and stared at the new contact. “The Boss? Are you really that arrogant?  You know I will never call you that right?”

“Sure. Everyone calls me Boss Man.”

He looked Mickey up and down and could see he was serious. “More like boss boy short stack.”

“Hey” Mickey held up his hands in defense “It’s just a name alright. Change it, call me That Guy for all I fuckin care. You got my number.”

“Yea. I don’t know why but..yea.” He glanced away then back at Mickey. “Why? Why do I have your number? We’re not friends Mickey. You ruined my life remember?”

Mickey’s smile fell and he rubbed at his nose “That was business, Gallagher. You may think you know me but you don’t. That” he gestured towards the phone in his hand “That’s for when you realize what we both know.”

“And what’s that Mickey?”

Mickey laughed “I can’t change the past Ian. All I can do is try to make now more bearable. So….when you wanna hang out again, you got my number.”

Mickey turned and walked away. When he reached the door he threw away his coffee cup then looked over his shoulder giving him a two finger salute. He quickly averted his eyes gluing them to the counter. He opened the messenger app on his phone feeling the need to spill every emotion running through him and there was only one person who he trusted with the information.

C0micB00k_L0v3r: I’m Bipolar. That’s why I texted you all that stuff and I was acting so strange. I take meds but sometimes stress or big changes can fuck with my chemicals and my meds don't work as well. Losing the shop and breaking up with my boyfriend where all my brain could handle and I kinda lost my shit. I’m good now though and I’m sorry for being so weird. If you don’t wanna talk to me any more than I understand. I just wanted to say thank you for being a friend and helping me through a hard time...I hope we can still be friends. xo

Chapter Text

Should he answer? He should. It had been several weeks since Ian sent him the confession filled message. He re-read over it at least 50 times, his fingers, mind, and heart at war with each other. Truth is, as soon as he left he wanted to reply to the message but he was afraid he would give himself away. He had to consider the longer he waited to write back the more Ian would suffer wondering what he did wrong when in fact, he did nothing. It wasn’t Ian’s fault that he, Mickey Milkovich, was too much of a coward to say he was B0$$B0y_420.

No. He wasn’t a coward. He had a plan, there was a difference.

He was going to slowly back off online and become more present in the real world...the one that mattered. If Ian could fall in love with him through a touchscreen, he could win his heart in person. That was the goal.

First things first, he needed to write Ian back. He didn’t want him to feel guilty for somethin out of his control. After they parted at the coffee shop he spent most of his free time filtering through the internet, tryin to learn what Bipolar was. What mania was. He was so overloaded with mixed information, he didn’t know where to start. It affected everyone different and the cause was unknown. Some articles said it was genetics, others said it was a from a chemical or hormone imbalance. There were many factors that contributed to the disorder, it was hard to understand how anyone could live with it.

But Ian did.

That beautiful red-headed man walked through each day trying to be his best self, yet inside he was fighting a constant battle. In the texts, it said he was manic when he came over. That explained the fast talkin and jigsaw puzzle of clothes and furniture in his apartment. At least he took his meds. They just stopped workin..

He didn’t get that.

Aren’t meds supposed to fix shit? They should be reliable. How was it Ian’s fault? How was any of it Ian’s fault? He sounded so dejected in his message like he was expectin him to just toss him aside. Had people done that before? Did he do that? It had been two weeks. If he did reject him it wasn’t intentional, he just needed time to process. He could never toss Ian aside, if he could life would be much more simple.

He grabbed his phone from the charger on his kitchen table and clicked on his messenger app.
Ian was amazin. A pain in the ass, but he didn’t take shit lyin down and he respected him for that. Hell, he was fallin for the asshole because of his passion. Ian needed to know he wasn’t alone and if he couldn’t say anythin as himself then Boss Boy needed to step up and make things right.

B0$$B0y_420: Hey there ;p I been super busy with work so I just saw this message. Don’t worry bout that shit man. 4real. You got nothin to be ashamed about, you kick ass. Don’t know how you live with shit like that and still survive each day. You must be Superman.

He rolled his eyes after he hit send. He shouldn’t have said he didn’t see it. The messages had read receipts. Maybe Ian wouldn’t notice. This was a time when he wished he could delete a message. Even more so when Ian’s little icon appeared next to his message. Two fuckin weeks and that’s what he came up with? Superman?

C0micB00kL0v3r: He speaks..
C0micB00kL0v3r: 2 weeks later….just saying :/

He rubbed at his nose and leaned back in his chair as he read over the message. Ian was upset or shall he say ComicBookLover was. He’d shared very personal information with him and he waited too long to respond.

B0$$B0y420: Yup..Guess I didn’t know what to say. I was tryin to avoid sayin some stupid shit cause I like you…didn’t wanna fuck it up.

C0micB00kL0v3r: I like you too..
C0micB00kL0v3r: I was afraid I scared you off. I was really hoping that wasn’t the case because who would I talk to about the disaster that is my life lol. Just kidding. I’m actually doing ok now thanks to a little guidance from a certain someone ;)

He could feel the blush creep across his cheeks as he read the message. He was certain Ian meant Boss Boy but a part of him hoped he was referring to the rendezvous in his apartment. He didn't know if that day had any impact on the red headed man but for him it was the first step in a long series of moves calculated to win his heart. Ugh. He shook his head. When did he get so fuckin sentimental? He blamed Ian, if it wasn’t for his big been eyes and tiny freckles bein so damn sweet and fuckin mezmerizin then maybe he wouldn’t feel like his heart was in his throat every time he saw him.

B0$$B0y420: You can talk to me bout anythin. Don’t want you to question that. I’m not here to judge you.

He waited about 20 minutes but there was no response. He put his phone down and picked his duffel bag up from the floor. He stuffed it with a clean towel and a fresh change of clothes for when he finished his workout. He got a new outfit in the mail and this was the perfect excuse to wear it. It was a Friday night and if Scotty didn’t try and drag him to the bar after he would be surprised, he always did. He needed a good night out. Charlie and Terry were up his ass about their next venture. He was looking for another company to invest in to get more play in the shark-infested waters of his town. He couldn’t decide which way he wanted to go. There were so many options. Ian was stubborn but not everyone was happy with their small business, some people were waiting for people like him to save them from mountains of debt from some failed venture. Hmph. Maybe after a hard work out and a few stiff drinks he’d have a better idea of what to do. He grabbed his water, made sure Baxter had plenty of food then headed out the door.

**
Ian swiped up through his google results with a click of his tongue. Why was every decent gym in his area so fucking expensive? He liked to have a clean facility, with up to date equipment...nothing fancy. He didn’t need the spa, or the movie theater, or the tanning salon. Just give him a treadmill for cardio and some weights and he was good. He switched over to the second page of results when he found Sonny's. It looked decent from the pictures. The machines were all white which must be a pain to clean but he could see that had the basics; treadmill, elliptical weights, and a lap pool. To top it off it was only 25$ a month. Hell yea. That was perfect. He used to swim in highschool. That and Rotc kept him in shape.

He needed to get in shape. Not for anyone else, but for himself. Who knows, maybe a good workout a few times a week would help ease him back into the real world. His life had consisted of work and home, that was it. He and Craig didn’t get out much when they did it was usually related to books or some sort of health fair.

He’d been ready to workout for a few weeks now. Since he fell off the wagon and brought home a box of donuts from the grocery store..and yes, he ate them all. They were on sale and his sweet tooth wouldn’t let him say no. Not to mention he was about to start a new, more sedentary job. He spent hours running around his store before and now he would be glued to a desk drawing cartoon characters for children's books. It was a good gig, but it just solidified his decision to work out daily.

He jumped up from his bed and grabbed up his gym bag. He was ready to take on this new life, he didn’t really have a choice.

The sign-up process had to be the most annoying part out of the whole experience. He sat with a woman named Sophia who told him all the rules and went over the classes and perks. After about 30 minutes he was ready to go work out. He thought he would start with the lap pool. He walked across the green floor and towards the changing rooms. He picked out a locker and unloaded his stuff then changed into his swim trunks. Cardio and the freshness of the water was the perfect mixture. He showered off then made his way out to the pool area.

The water was ice cold, chilling him to the bone just how he liked it. He pulled his goggles over his eyes then dove hands out into the freezing cold water letting it awake his senses as he began his first lap.

**
“Fuck” he huffed wiping his forehead with the small towel on his shoulder. That workout was long overdue. He’d been distracted by work and had been slackin on his physique. Lemon bars, pie, brownies and ice cream. All that shit he loved, especially when his sister made them. But when he stepped on the scale and saw he gained 5lbs he realized he needed to hit the gym and hit it hard. There was a reason he could eat whatever he wanted and still look amazing.

Exercise. Exercise. Exercise.

He was ready to go sweat off the last few pounds then finish off with a nice shower.

Fuckin Scott bailed. Another reason he put the pedal to the metal. He was used to havin a workout buddy and light conversation. On the rare occasion Scott flaked out he would put his headphones in and drift away into the music as he worked out, his focus purely to beat whatever goal he set in his mind. Today was a good run. He did 30 minutes on the treadmill at a running speed, 30 minutes on the elliptical, 15 on the leg press and lastly 25 on the rowing machine. That last one kicked his fuckin ass.

He walked across the room to his locker and peeled off the shirt sticking to his back. He tossed it in his gym bag then headed to the steam room.

**
He shook the water from his hair and gripped the edge of the pool to catch his breath. His teeth chattered and his heart was racing. His head felt like a balloon as he tried to steady his breath. This proved two things. One, he smoked too much...he really should quit. Two, he was out of shape and in desperate need for a workout routine. Sixteen year old him would talk so much crap if he saw him here struggling to breath after only a few laps. This was supposed to be the start of his workout but he was throwing in the towel. He was done for today. He read a sign on the wall in the locker room saying there was a steam room. He’d never done that before but he’d been told it was great for after a workout, helped with circulation, stiff joints and best of all burned calories. That followed by a nice shower sounded like the perfect way to end the day.

He walked to the locker room and grabbed a fresh towel then walked down the hall to the steam room. When he opened the door his body was encompassed in steam and his nose filled with the smell of eucalyptus. “Mmm” he hummed letting the invigorating scent flow through his body. He squinted and could make out two..maybe three more people. The room was smaller than he’d expected with one long bench on either side. He walked over to the bench where he saw only one body. He closed his eyes, stretched out his legs before resting his head against the wall.

The room was too quiet for him to really relax. He wondered if maybe he could bring his Bluetooth in here but that question was answered with the word steam. If he had a waterproof one maybe but he didn’t so damn.

He moved his head side to side letting a melody fill his mind. It was stupid. This song had been stuck in his head for days yet it had no significance to him at all, still, he couldn’t seem to erase it from his memory. “Hmm mm” he hummed “call me a thief hmm left with her heart hmm no apologies..Mm darkness shadows hmm heartless..”

“Yo!” Someone shouted next to him. “Aye asshole. Shut the fuck up, some of us are tryin to relax here not attend your fuckin solo show.”

His eyes popped open and he sat up. He knew that voice. He narrowed his eyes squinting but couldn’t make out a face through the steam. “Mickey?”

“Gallagher?”

He scooted down on the bench until he was next to the solemn figure and now it was clear who he was. “Mickey Milkovich, I should’ve known that was you. The hostility was a dead a giveaway.”

“Uh huh well,” Mickey licked his lips “who sings in the fuckin steam room?”

“People who can actually sing. You don’t like my voice?” He cocked his eyebrow mocking him. “I don’t think it’s awful. Maybe not the best but I shouldn’t keep it to myself.”

“You should if you’re in a tiny fuckin room surrounded by people who want to relax not be fuckin serenaded.” Mickey breathed in a deep breath “Why you even here Gallagher? I never seen you around before?”

“Wow, didn’t know I couldn’t be here.” He’s already over this conversation. Mickey’s incapable of not being a douche. Just the way he says things rubs him wrong. Not to mention what he says is rude. “It’s affordable and runnin distance from my house. Thought I’d give it a try.”

Mickey leaned back against the wall, turning his head so he was looking at him. “So it has nothin to do with the fact that this is my gym and you been dyin to see me? You followin me now Gallagher? 1st the coffee shop now this?”

Um...Mickey was the only who sat by him at the coffee shop. What followed was just him being polite. It’s not like he could’ve told him to go away. So he bought him a cup of coffee...who cares? “Yep you caught me Mickey. I’m obsessed. I just can’t stay away from the person who ruined my life” he said sweetly. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Don’t bother me none.” Mickey sat up and scooted closer to him. “Nice seein a fresh face around here. Not like you need it though.” His eyes landed on his chest “Look pretty good to me.”

He scooted over. Close proximity be damned. Why couldn’t this room be bigger? He should just leave, staying was asking for trouble. That’s all Mickey was. Trouble in an Armani suit. “Thanks but can you not” he said annoyed that he almost liked what Mickey said.

Mickey sucked his bottom lip between his teeth and turned to look at the wall. “So..you like Ansel Elgort? Not bad. You seen Baby Driver?”

“You know Ansel Elgort? That’s surprisin. Would’ve pegged you for the classic rock type.” He looked away wondering when is the polite time to leave. Does he have to be polite with Mickey? “Baby Driver was pretty good”

Mickey studied his face and for a moment he wondered if he could tell he was lying. He liked the song but he’d never seen the movie. He’d been asked about it several times though so he decided fuck it, why not say yes.

Mickey licked his lips “Maybe I do. I like a lot of things Gallagher.” The brunette leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes letting out a deep sigh. “You’d know that….” he turned to look at him “If you took the time to get to know me.”

His eyes scanned Mickey’s body briefly until he realized what he was actually doing. Whatever... you can think someone’s attractive and still dislike them. Looks don’t drive personality. “But I do know you Mickey. You’re a tyrant set out to ruin small businesses includin mine. That’s all I gotta know. The rest of it doesn’t matter much cause the results still the same.” It was harsh but true. Nothing could give him back what he lost. The memories, the long days and laughter filled night doing inventory. He lived for that shop and now it was gone. Like it never existed. Just another torn out page from Mickey’s checkbook. After he went to Mickey’s store he could see why it was so popular. Kudos for building a successful business but at what cost? Were his giant fish tank and couture ink paintings worth his integrity?

Mickey’s eye went downcast before he looked over into the distance as his lips pulled into a straight line. The man rubbed his nose with his knuckle. “That was business Gallagher.” Mickey still couldn’t meet his eyes. “ I’ll agree it could’ve gone better but I’m not the bad guy here. I paid you 2x what that store was worth.” Mickey turned and fixed his gaze. It was heavy and his eyes were laced with remorse and something he couldn’t quite read. He didn’t want to read. Now he wished the brunette would’ve continued to look away. “If you’d have taken my offer when I first made it, stead of playin games then you wouldn’t have lost so much. Either way, I’m sorry it had to happen. I know it meant a lot to you. Believe me or don’t..”

He doesn’t or at least doesn’t want to. “Guess money makes up for takin one of the things that matter most to me.” He laughed and shook his head. “Didn’t know money bought happiness but it’s just business.”

Mickey shook his head then jumped up from the bench “What do you want from me Gallagher? What’s done is done.” The man let out a frustrated laugh and licked his lips “I..I don’t know what else to do man but this hot and cold shit isn’t cool.”

Hot and cold? When was he ever hot? Maybe there was a time but that had long passed. Now when he saw Mickey he saw betrayal, lies. How could he ever trust him again?

“Either you hate me or you forgive me, there’s no in between.” Mickey walked back to the bench and plopped down. “If you hate me then stop talkin to me, lose my number. If you don’t then give me a fuckin chance. I told you before I can’t change the past.”

“You’re right. You did tell me that.” He looked away then down. It would be so much easier if he could decide if he truly hated Mickey. His feelings are...complex. At times the man seemed genuine. He would forget about their differences and live in the moment but something always ruined it and he was left with a bitter taste in his mouth.

Mickey looked at him and past over his face briefly, was it sympathy? “You’re lucky I don’t give up easily. If I did I wouldn’t be the tyrant as you so eloquently put” Mickey laughed. “Gotta use charm and you know, the mob to get what I want” he was silent. “That was a fuckin joke Gallagher. Gotta laugh every once in a while. It’s good for you. Plus you got a nice smile” Mickey shrugged. “Better than that kicked puppy look. C’mon laugh. I got more bad jokes, I could keep goin.” He couldn’t help the laugh that slipped past his lips. “See fuckin feels good don’t it. Should try it more often. Might actually enjoy yourself.”

He scoffed and folded his arms. Why did that cocky grin get to him? Mickey was such an arrogant asshole yet..when he looked at him now he saw Mickey, just call me Mick. The guy who made him laugh and whose blue eyes left him flustered when he walked out of his store. He was still blown away by his dual personas. He glanced away thinking of what to say next then his eyes lifted to meet with blue eyes. “It was pretty bad” he laughed “please don’t tell another one.” He let out a deep breath in defeat as he felt his anger slipping away. “I got a confession.” Mickey tilted his head and raised a brow. “I never saw Baby Driver” he smiled again “Everyone has told me about it but I’m a slacker. Now Predator...that’s a movie I’d spend money to see.”

“You should. It was fuckin good. Both of them were. Bit of a movie buff. Even if I fuckin go by myself a lot of the time”

He liked movies too. There were quite a few he’d been wanting to see but his busy schedule would never allow it. Now with his job illustrating, he would work from home. He’d have more time to do that kind of thing. He sucked at his cheek and tapped his fingers against the bench “I’ve never seen the rest of them. Only the most recent one.” He laughed “to be honest I didn’t even know it was a series. I like action movies and sci-fi movies. I’m just really behind. At least I watched the Godfather. Not understanding those references was getting annoying, between you, Craig and Matty .” He leaned back and continued to chew nervously. This is why he didn’t relax around Mickey. It was too easy… “I don’t really like mafia movies, I don’t get the hype, never have.”

Mickey’s eyes went wide with surprise and that cock grin surfaced once again.“No mafia movies? You’re missing out man. I like every type of movie except romance.” Mickey scratched his neck and looked off into the distance. “I’m super picky with that. All that fuckin love at first sight, can’t eat, sleep, or breathe without a person don’t make no sense.” The man met his eyes again and a small smile crossed his lips. “Don’t get me wrong Gallagher, believe in love, but some of those fuckin movies are ridiculous.”

“Yea they are” he mused pulling his hands into his lap. He twirled his thumbs and averted his eyes feeling Mickey gaze boring into him. He didn’t believe in that stuff either...not really.

Ok, maybe a little.
Maybe a lot. What could he say?

Mickey pegged him right away. He liked a little romance but he was no damsel in distress. He wasn’t looking for prince charming to come and save him..not anymore. He thought he found his Prince but then he had to go be himself and ruin it. Boss Boy acted like he was ok but now he knew the truth. The guy lied, he read his message right after he sent them. He could tell it was too much for him to handle and he would eventually stop talking to him.They all did, it’s just the way things went. That didn’t mean he couldn’t dream and try to drag out his fairytale for as long as possible. “Who needs love anyway” he looked back to the brunette. “It’s not like love lasts forever so why do we search so hard for it. What’s the point in the end?”

Mickey rolled his eyes then scooted closer to him, a little too close. The brunette slid his hand across the bench and grabbed his own, pulling him free from his anxious habit. “What kinda fuckin attitude is that hm? Thought you were about love? Just because it seems fuckin pointless doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try right?” Mickey looked in the distance through the steam and he felt a light squeeze on his hand. His breath hitched and he had to fight the urge not to pull away. “Look at all those old fucks that have been together for like 50 years” Mickey turned back to him a sweet smile painted across his face that made his stomach flutter. “Loves hard to find but it’s not impossible hm. Don’t give up. One day your prince will come.”

Ok, that was it. Too close, too much...just “it’s too hot in here” he stammered slowly pulling his hand away. He stood up “ I feel like I can’t breathe, I...I have to go.”

“Uh ok. Nice seein ya Gallagher. Try not to sing slow loud next time. Or at least pick a different song”

He laughed, “thought you liked that song.”

Mickey stood up and started walking to the door. “I do, when the person who wrote it sings it. Not when you’re playin steam room karaoke.” He looked over his shoulder at him “Look Gallagher, you’re pretty, you’re smart and you can draw really fuckin good, you don't need to sing.”

He licked his lips swallowing his comeback and jogged over to the brunette who was swiftly walking out the door.

*

Despite the earlier conversation moments ago, the walk to the shower was eerily quiet. He felt like he could choke on the tension between him and his dark-haired nemesis. He could taste the slight twinge of iron on his tongue and noticed he'd been chewing on his cheek since the steam room. With the steam gone, his eyes stayed glued to the door at the end of the hallway because the alternative was seeing Mickey in his swim trunks with drops of sweat sliding through the maze of ridges that made up his toned chest. His mouth went bone dry and when he tried to swallow it was thick and heavy. He’d never felt this way before and he’d seen men naked. Mickey was still decent if you could call it that.

“What gives Gallagher?” A firm hand squeezed the back of his neck as they passed through the door into the locker room. “You need to eat a fuckin sandwich or somethin? Looks like you’re bout to pass out on me man.” Mickey walked past him over to a locker in the corner and with a few turns opened the combination lock and pulled out his towel.

“Is that a Ninja Turtles towel?”

Mickey smiled at him and spread the towel so he could view the full picture. “Sure is.” His lips turned up into a wide grin at the sight before him.

Mickey raised a brow then turned his towel to face him “What? You don’t like the Ninja Turtles?”

“No, it’s not that.”

“Whatever man. The Turtles rock.” Mickey pushed passed him. “I’ma take a shower.” Blue eyes trailed up his body “You probably should too. Steam is good but makes your skin all fuckin sticky and shit.” He saw something in the brunette's eyes as he spoke that left him speechless. He stood there like a mindless idiot and watched as Mickey not walked but sauntered around the corner to the showers.

He took in a deep breath and rolled his shoulders back. “Shake it off” he coached himself. He didn’t just need a shower he needed a cold shower. Maybe that could wash this tantalizing feeling from his body, and the guilt from his skin. There was no way he could have any feelings for that Titan. Mickey could play nice all he wanted and he could play along. There was no harm there, why make things more complicated with spite? That didn’t mean that he saw the older man as anything more than a friendly acquaintance, friendly was putting a stretch on it. He walked around the corner and picked out a stall. He hung his towel on the shiny metallic hook and reached inside to turn on the water. As he stepped inside to wash away the filth caking his mind and body, he noticed the stall next to him. It had a Ninja Turtles towel hanging beside it. “Come oooon” he whispered in despair and shook his head. Whatever. It was just a shower. Everyone showered. He stepped into the hot water and let it run down his face before combing his fingers through his hair to rinse out the chlorine. As the warm water slid down his body his mind started to slip away until he was face to face with the man next door. Only Mickey wasn’t looking at him. Instead, he was running a sudsy bar of soap over his chest leaving tiny bubbles to be washed away by the waterfall of the shower. His eyes popped open and he took a step back until the cool tile pressed against his back. His heart was beating against his chest as he allowed his mind to wander again. Mickey. He was soaping his body and rinsing his hair in the stall next to him. At that moment the man was vulnerable and he had the ultimate control. He could see him clear as day in his mind and Mickey would never know. It didn’t mean anything. The man was hot, in a self-centered, arrogant asshole kind of way. He was only human and it had been weeks since he felt any release. With Craig out of the picture he was left to fend for himself, and the adjustment of his meds left him wanting. That’s all this was. Pure, basic, raw human need and he was entitled to it after all he’d been through. He tilted his head back and let the stream from the shower wash over him as his hand slid slowly down his wet skin. His fingers lingered scared to cross this line but his fear only meant he had feelings. He didn’t. This was just for him and he was putting way too much thought into it. He reached down and licked the water from his lips turning his head so his cheek was against the cold tile and his eyes were trained on the wall diving him from the brunette on the other side. Maybe the guilt is what made this simple act feel like a firestorm but now his hand was moving with vigor and his legs felt like noodles below him, limp and weak. He sucked his top lip into his mouth to hold back the sounds that were fighting to escape as he pictured piercing blue eyes, dripping wet ivory skin and a sculpted chest covered in soapy suds and water droplets. He balled his fist and squeezed his eyes shut as the feeling took over like an eruption coming from his toes and vibrating through his entire body. He tossed his head to the side, his chest heaving as his labored breath filled the stall. His eyes blinked slowly open just in time to see his release washed down the shower drain. Goosebumps patterned his skin leaving him feeling not relieved but disgusted. Mickey was not his friend, he was not his lover, he was the man who destroyed his life.

He was going to have to find a new gym.

“Yo Gallagher? You drown in there or somethin?”

How’d he know it was him? Was he..did he hear him? “N..no” he stammered. He reached a wet hand out to grab for his towel. He felt around but no luck.

“Here.”

The soft fabric was placed in his hand and he slowly pulled it into the shower. “Shit” he smacked the handle turning off the water before his towel became a wet mess the same as him. He patted himself dry then wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped out. Mickey was standing there with a raised brow fully dressed in his designer denim shirt, sleeves rolled up. His black sweat pants had racing stripes up the side but it was hard not to miss the Valentino logo that outlined each leg. His eyes wandered down to a simple pair of white vans causing a frustrated laugh to leave his lips.

“What?” Mickey looked at his shoes. “You never seen shoes before?”

“Not that” He walked over to his locker simply pulling it open. He had nothing of value, why waste the money on a lock. “You just...you amuse me, Milkovich.” He pulled his backpack out and unzipped it. “You go to a local gym when you’re rich enough you could just buy one or better yet have a a fleet of personal trainers.”

Mickey smiled “Actually I did and I do.”

He furrowed his brow now thoroughly confused. This man was one conundrum after the other. He pulled his Bears t-shirt over his head “What? You own this gym?”

“Technically, I’m a silent partner.” Mickey walked up to him and set his hand on his shoulder “You didn’t think it was just comic books, did you? I got investments Gallagher”

He shrugged away from the older man, suffocating in his cockiness. “So how many other businesses you steal? Was this a family owned gym before you sank your teeth into it?”

Mickey rolled his eyes “Just because I own somethin don’t mean I fuckin stole it. You’re makin me sound like a broken record here, business is business, man. I told you, it aint personal. Anyway, since you asked so nicely..” Mickey pointed to a picture on the wall. There were several black and white photos and one more recent one. Two had the gym and people posing in front of it. The third was an older Italian man. He recognized him from the website. He was cutting a ribbon in front of the door to the lap pool. “That’s Sonny Archuletta. He and Charlie go way back.”

“Charlie?”

“Yea. The old guy who gave you the check you rudely tore up, he’s my Grandpa.”

“Oh.” He set his jaw and crossed his arms “this matters why?”

“It matters because…” Mickey froze in mid-sentence then averted his eyes as crimson crept across his cheeks. It was only when he felt the cool air touching his legs, h looked down to see his towel had fallen leaving him in nothing but a t-shirt and slightly at attention. As if the shower incident weren’t enough...

“Jesus!” He turned around and snatched his jeans from the bag then hastily pulled them on. “Don’t be all weird Milkovich, we’re guys. We have penises.” Even as he spoke he wanted to run and flee in the other direction. “ What um...what were you were sayin..”

“Uh yea..” Mickey looked back over to the wall avoiding his eyes “Sonny owned the gym but the bank was tryin to take it. See Sonny didn’t believe in payin taxes so Charlie asked me how I felt bout buyin the place from him so he could get out of debt.” Mickey’s face started to glow as he spoke “I grew up here. Went to this gym after school sometimes with my brothers. Even spent the night a few time when Terry got too fuckin drunk. I didn’t wanna see a nice old man like Sonny out on the streets so I bought it. Sonny retired and his son Luca runs the joint. Sophia his sister handles the memberships. As for me..” Mickey turned to face him. I take 30% I think...Charlie handles most of the books.”

“Wow.” He clapped his hands dumbfounded by the irony. “I finally have the time to get out and go to the gym and I chose the own owned by you.”

“By Sonny. Did you not hear what I said?”

He scratched behind his neck “Yea...I heard Mick. That was a nice thing you did. Maybe you’re not doomed after all.”

“Told you.” Mickey stretched his arms above his head “There’s more than meets the eye Gallagher. Can’t judge a book by its cover.”

“ I read the book and don’t think it needs a sequel, so if you’ll excuse me..”

Mickey blocked his way walking directly in front of him. “I’m thirsty and I could eat. Scotty and I usually hit the bars after a long workout but as you can see his bitch ass bailed on me. You down?”

NO. Say no. Just push him out of the way and leave. You don’t owe him anything. “I should really get…”

“Come on Gallagher” Mickey raised a brow “Don’t wanna make go all by myself do you? Someone might try and take advantage of me.”

“We wouldn’t want that.” He laughed and ran his tongue across his lips. “Sure. I guess I could use a beer. He was weak. Honestly, a beer sounded great and his stomach was growling. Today was supposed to be relaxing and get him back into some sort of life routine but it only seemed to shake things up worse.

Mickey licked his lips and glanced away with a coy smile before pulling open the locker room door “Great follow me then.” The brunette disappeared but his voice echoed behind him.“I know a place a few blocks from here that has killer nachos and plenty of pool tables.”

He heaved his backpack over his shoulder and shuffled out of the locker room to keep up with Mickey as the man walked to the exit. “Slow down. Pool?”

Mickey looked behind him “Seriously Gallagher? Pool?” he sighed. “Green table, 9 balls, you hit them with sticks to get them into the pockets?”

“I know..” he let out a small laugh feeling his stomach churn. This was too much. What is he doing. Just go home. “I..I know what pool is Mickey. I thought you just wanted to grab a drink not..”

“Hang out?”

“Yea.”

“When are you gonna realize Gallagher, you and me, we got chemistry. Besides, it’s just pool and some beers. Not like I’m askin you on a date or nothin. Just two guys, doin guy stuff.”

That made sense right? He didn’t do guy stuff. He did book stuff, health stuff and family stuff. He didn’t have friends outside of the shop and his family. He played pool at the Aliby a few times when he was younger but that was it. He wasn’t a bar guy. “Ok, Milkovich.” They walked outside and the sun was starting to set. He looked over to the man beside him as his black hair shined in the shadow of the sun. “You’re on.”

Chapter Text

“Mm no way!” He popped a chip into his mouth as he stared down the redhead. “Michelangelo is the best hands down.”

“You’re crazy Milkovich, It’s Donatello.” Ian crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, his lips pulled into a smug grin. “He’s the whole package. Brains and braun.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose “That doesn’t..Michelangelo has nunchucks dude. You know how hard that is to master? All Donatello has is a staff.

“It’s a Bo staff Mickey, and he has 2. I thought you knew about this stuff.”

He scoffed and reached for his 3rd beer. “Uh huh. Well what does your online lover think? He even know who the Ninja Turtles are?”

Ian sat up straight and reached for his phone. He watched as thin fingers tapped against the black screen. “What? Sore subject? Thought you two were a thing or whatever.”

“It’s not...we are..I think.” Ian rolled his eyes and pulled his phone closer to him almost protectively. “He loves comics. We met in a comic chat room.”

“Ask him then.”

“I don’t want to. It’s stupid and he’s probably busy.”

He could see that Ian was getting uncomfortable talking about his online persona and he wanted to know why, maybe this was his chance to lead him away from the computer screen and into his arms. “It’s not stupid. It’s a valid question and you said he likes this shit. We talked about it..wait argued about it” he laughed. “Plus if this guy likes you, he’ll probably take your side anyways.”

“Maybe, I know he likes me.” Ian glanced away then back to him. “Some things just happened and I don’t know if I freaked him out. He doesn’t talk as much as he used to and I..” Ian sighed. “Why are we talkin about this? It’s really none of your business.”

He reached his hand across the table and slipped his fingers into Ians warm grip. “Maybe it is. Maybe I think you and me are friends and I care about my friends.” He smoothed the sft underside of Ian’s skin with his thumb. “Personally I think online datin is dangerous.” He stared at his hand intertwined with Ian’s lost in the moment. “I mean..how do you know who you’re even fuckin talkin to? Could be some fat guy in his …”

“Stop!” Ian yanked his hand free and placed it with his phone in his lap. “It’s not like that Mickey. Not everyone is scheming to get what they want like you.”

He let out a heavy sigh as his romantic moment crashed and burned. He sat back and clicked his tongue “How do you fuckin know that Gallagher?  You watch the news. People are fuckin shady, especially online. They just arrested a dude for havin body parts in his fridge uptown. That’s sposed to be the good area, you gotta be careful.”

Ian narrowed his eyes, his gaze hard and heavy then slowly it fell and the boy laughed lightly offering him a slight smile. “If you find my body in an ice chest somewhere Mick then you can say I told you so..”

“You’d be dead but I’ll still say it.” He took a sip of his beer then stood up from the table. He took off his imaginary hat and rest it across his chest clearing his throat. “Here lies Ian Clayton Gallagher,” he sniffed and wiped away an imaginary tear, “killed by some perv he met online because he didn’t listen to his bestest friend Mickey Milkovich who knew better. Rest in pieces….I told you so.”

Ian clapped slowly, “Very heartfelt. Touching.”

“Yea. I thought so” He sat down then reached for another chip. “For real though. Why don’t you wanna talk to this guy. He say somethin wrong or?”

Ian’s chest heaved up and down then the man leaned forward resting his elbows on the table. “You know how you came over a few weeks ago and I was all over the place?”

Game face Mickey. This is it, this is your chance. “Yea and? Everyone has those days…”

Ian looked away “Not everyone Mick. I have Bipolar.” Ian sat back and twisted his fingers fingers into the sleeve of his shirt. “My mom had it and when I was 16 I had my first episode. It came out of nowhere. I take meds and they usually help even things out but a few weeks ago they stopped working and I..I was manic when you saw me, when I wrote him.” Ian sighed and he could hear the sadness lacing his voice. “I said some crazy shit and... think I spooked him. He says I didn’t but he waited so long to talk to me and…It just feels diff”

For the second time since he met Ian, he pressed a finger against his soft lips. “You worry to much Gallagher. If this guy likes you,  genuinely likes you, then that shit don’t matter. He can handle it.” He locked eyes with Ian “He can handle anythin..”

Green eyes broke contact and averted to the ground “I don’t want him to handle it.”

“What if he wants to..” Oops. Did he say that out loud. Ian looked at him blankly and he knew he needed to say something. “I  mean, who are you to decide whether or not he can handle something like that? You deserve love and shit. Bipolar or whatever don’t define you. How you deal with it does and from what I seen you know what your doin.”

“You didn’t see much.” Ian replied his voice wavering. “It took him two weeks to talk to me. He told me I was amazing for dealing with it my whole life. He said I was like..”

“Superman” he mused.

Ian’s eyes went wide and he could see his adam's apple bob as he swallowed his curiosity. “Exactly.”

The mood changed at the table with Ian’s last words. It became to deep, emotion was rolling from Ian’s eyes like a tidal wave but the man looked composed. He was Superman. Living and breathing in all his red headed glory. He was having a hard time finding a balance between tearing Boss Boy down and building himself up since Ian’s online lover was in fact the same person. He needed to lighten the mood either way.“Hmph..the guy sounds alright but..what if he’s married? He might not be a serial killer but he could be a liar. Could be like those guys who just collect wives and shit. You could be a collectors item just like your comics.” Not the humor he was going for..

Ian rolled his eyes “He’s not married.”

“You ask him?”

“No but..trust me. He’s not.” Ian brought his phone up from his lap and set it on the table “I’m gonna ask him to meet again. I know he’s not like the horror stories, I know he’s not married or some fat guy in his moms basement..... I need him to be real.”

“What makes you think he’s fake?”

Ian scoffed “Other than you telling me he’s an axe murderer or a Polygamist?” The man laughed and caressed his phone. “He’s perfect. He knows all my darkest secrets and still comes back for more...even if it takes him a while. I need to know he really exists.”

“He does..” The urge to reach across the table and pull Ian into a passionate kiss was strong. He wanted to show him how real his cyber lover truly  was but not yet. “Come on” he stood up and held out his hand. “There's a table open.” Ian hesitated for a moment then grabbed his hand standing up.

They made their way across the bar to the pool area. He racked the balls and called his color. He was always stripes. He took a shot “Fuck!” He got the purple solid in.

“Nice!” Ian wiggled his brows then leaned over the table lining up his shot. “Looks like I’m stripes.” The man pulled back on his stick then made his shot and the ball bounced off the table.

“Jesus Gallagher. I thought you said you played before.”

Ian shrugged his shoulders and his face turned a bright shade of pink. “I did. When I was a kid...”

He picked up the ball and walked around to where Ian was standing. “Unexceptable man.” He set the cue ball down on the table behind the starting area where it was previous. He stood next to Ian, “first you line up the shot.” Ian leaned forward and lined his stick with the cue ball, it looked like he was going for the 11. “Ok now” he reached and touched Ians hand where he was holding the stick. He could feel heart his heart thump against his chest when Ian turned to look at him. He licked his lips and felt the warmth of blood flowing to his cheeks.“Look at the ball Gallagher not me.” Ian turned back to his shot. He walked behind him and touched his waist scooting him more to the left. “Now focus on the angle, don't try and hit it dead on when its a corner pocket.” He moved his hand over Ians so that he was aiming his shot to hit the right corner of the 11. “Keep your stick off the table like this” he lifted the tip so it was resting between Ian’s thumb and forefinger. He stepped to the side again to avoid getting hit “Now take the shot.”

Ian pulled back the stick, aimed and with a loud smack shot the 11 into the corner pocket.

“Holy shit Mick!” Strong arms wrapped around him and he swore he was standing on his tiptoes. “I made it.”

“Yup, good shot man.” He looked up and green emeralds met with his eyes,  their face mere inches apart. “Glad to be of service” he said softly as his eyes drifted to study the pillowy pink lips before him. He met with Ian’s gaze once more and felt a spark. He squeezed the younger man and leaned forward about to close his eyes when he heard the sound of the Imperial March from Star Wars fill the air.

“Shit” Ian let go of him and rushed over to their table where his phone was going off. The younger boy went to grab it and dropped it on the floor. “Fuck!” Ian bent down to grab it but then could not push accept in time.

He reached out and curled his fingers over Ian’s shoulder “It’s ok, just call them back”

“No Mickey, It’s not ok!” Ian shrugged his hand off and stepped away putting distance between them. Ian eyes scanned the room frantically then landed back on him before he reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. “None of this is ok. I’m sorry.”

His eyes widened at the 20$ in Ian’s hand.“Don’t even worry bout that shit.” He scoffed at the audacity. He was rich, Ian was not. It was simple. “I got it..”

“No! Take it.” Ian tossed the money onto the table. “My money is as good as yours ok. Just…” his phone rang and he could see the name DEBBIE on the screen. “I gotta go Mickey.” The redhead turned and bolted to the door..

“Ian” he followed swiftly behind him and out the door. “I can give you a ride..” he shouted after the man but Ian only gave a thumbs up his ear glued to his phone before he began to jog down the sidewalk. He leaned back against the wall of the bar…what the fuck was that? What happened? What did he do wrong? They were so close to sweet perfect fuckin surrender and now it seemed Ian was further away than he’d ever been before. There was only one thing he could think of. He pulled out his phone and opened his KIK.

B0$$B0y_420: Hey. How's your day goin? Anythin fun? Mine was pretty crazy but all in all a success I think….

His heart was caught in his throat as his eyes stayed glued to his screen. Finally after about 5 minutes the thought bubble appeared and began Ian typed his response.

C0micB00kL0v3r: Feels like I can’t breathe lol.

B0$$B0y_420: Why? Are you ok? What happened?

C0micB00kL0v3r:   I’m fine, just ran home. My little sisters here. She called and told me my brother Carl got arrested again. This time we can’t bail him out either...

Perfect! Actually no.. not really but this was a way he could help Ian.

B0$$B0y_420: Why? How much is it? What he do?

C0micB00kL0v3r: He really fucked up this time. He’s going to prison. Fiona is losing her mind and so is Debbie. I’m getting ready to take the bus over there.

C0micB00kL0v3r: He tried to steal a car….from a dealership. His bail is 20k, even if she put her house up there’s not enough equity. We’re fucked.

B0$$B0y_420: That sucks.

B0$$B0y_420: I gtg but I’ll hit you up later

C0micB00kL0v3r: Ok...I don’t know why I’m so freaked. It’s not like he hasn’t gone to juvie but this feels different

He shouldn’t...he really shouldn’t fuck with Ian’s emotions but this was the game and it was his turn to play.

B0$$B0y_420: It is different. He’s committed a felony.

B0$$B0y_420: Like I said I’m busy but we’ll talk later. Just wanted to check up on you...gtg

He laughed wickedly, he knew Ian was staring at his phone feeling betrayed by his confidant. It was ok though, he didn’t need Boss Boy. He had him and he was he was a pro at this kind of thing. Everything would be ok because he was going to take care of it. He clicked on his contacts and waited as the phone rang.

“Mickey how’s it going kiddo.”

“ Aye Martin. I’m good. How’s Vanessa?”

“Better than last week. She loved that chicken soup Mandy made. Ate the whole pot. We had to keep her and out for a week though to be sure it was gone. I’m on patrol Mickey, what can I do for ya?”

“got a friend who was arrested recently. Today actually. Need to know what his exact charges are.”

“What’s his name?”

“Carl Gallagher. He’s 19, white..Grand theft auto I think.”

“Yup found your boy. Looks like he and his girl tried to steal a Mercedes from over on Westmont.”

“There's a girl?” Great. Twice the money. “ You got the dealership info?”

“Sure. I’ll text you. What are you scheming there Mickey? I don’t got to worry now do I?”

He laughed “ Nah man. I got you.You’re family. Tell Richard I said hi and I’ll see you guys for poker on Saturday aight?”

“Alright Mickey. Be safe kiddo.”

He hung up the phone and pulled his cigarette pack from his pocket. He and Martin went way back. He was the officer who didn’t arrest him when he came out and a bar fight broke out. The man made a comment about not being able to go home to his husband so he knew he was gay and on his side. Shortly after he went to the station to bail his sister out for shoplifting and who was there but Martin. They talked, he shared. He didn’t like to share but Martin had that friendliness about him that just drew out information. He was the good in good cop, bad cop for a reason. Martin ended up tossing Mandy’s ticket and letting her off with a warning. She promised to bake him brownies. Since then they kept in touch and exchanged food. Now that he was on top he paid Martin to help him in certain situations….like these. Carl, Ian and anyone else involved could just sit back and let him do what he did best. He was a shark after all.

**

He stood there eyes wide as he watched his little brother walk through the front door arms linked with his girlfriends. He didn’t understand how this was possible. “How are you here right now?” He put down cigarette and rushed over to the door wrapping his arms around Carl in a tight embrace. “I don’t... what happened man, thought you were looking at 5yrs? That’s what the D.A told Fiona.

Carl laughed and patted his back before squirming away from his bearlike grip. He walked over to where his cigarette was smoking and plucked it from the ashtray and placed it between his lips. “Don’t know Ian. One night I’m bein shown my cell then 2 days later this guy I never seen before comes in sayin he’s my lawyer.”

“Lawyer? You mean Mr. Flannigan? The Public Defender?”

Carl shook his head and ashed his smoke “Nope. Different dude, this one was old like 70 or somethin. He told me he was paid already and that I was goin home. Apparently, the dealership owner dropped the charges.” Carl let out small laugh and a smile spread across his lips “I guess he told them he forgot he gave us permission to drive the car and that we lost the keys...it was wild man. I just agreed to everything and so did Cassidy.”

If his jaw had dropped any lower than he would be licking the carpet. How? A real lawyer, dropped charges and the clearly bullshit story...Mickey? No. He scoffed and sucked his lip between his teeth. Not possible. No one outside of their intimate circle knew. It wasn’t even on the news. The only person he told was Boss Boy and of course Kev and Vee. He didn’t understand any of this. Cassidy walked over to the table and sat down in Carl's lap.

“Doesn’t matter anyway way sweetie. We got away with it” she kissed Carl's head and petted his hair “next time we won’t get caught.”

“Next time?” Carl raised a brow then looked over at him briefly. Carls girlfriend was fucking psycho. She had Carl whooped. He was not about to let this retired debutante come and ruin Carl so she could play cops and robbers.

“Shouldn’t you tell your parents you’re home or something?” He walked behind Carl and pulled the chair from the table tipping it forward. Cassidy stood up to avoid falling to the floor. “You should go do that. Carl needs to stay out of trouble, at least let this all blow over before you two go do some other stupid shit.”

Cassidy rolled her eyes then looked at Carl “You gonna let him talk to me like that?”

His brother froze then jumped up “I think…. I swear I hear Fiona calling me” Carl looked at him “You heard her right?”

He nodded and laughed “Yea I heard her. Better go explain yourself and prepare to live in your room for the next century.” Carl turned and ran up the stairs. He returned his attention to the pouting princess. “Carl's gonna be a while and he probably won’t be able to speak to you for a long time so you can go on home.”

The girl stomped her foot then walked over to the stairs “I love you Carl. Call me!” She glared at him then walked out the door slamming it behind her.

He waited, grabbing another cigarette from his pack then sat down. After a few seconds he heard the creak of the stairs “I..is she..”

“Yea Carl, your bitch of a girlfriend is gone.”

His brother let out a sigh followed by a loud laugh “I don’t know what it is but she just” Carl smiled “She gives really good head”

He nodded “We have a tendency to attract crazy kid, just be careful, please. No more boostin cars like a moron. You got lucky this time.”

“I know.”

Carls eyes were downcast and he looked like a scorned puppy. He grabbed his phone and flipped it around. He was looking at the Comic-Con website, pricing the tickets. He went every year but he wasn’t sure about this year. “Wanna go with me?”

Carl grabbed his phone “Comic-Con? Isn’t that where losers dress up as my little pony and have orgies?”

“No” Ian grabbed his phone back. “Maybe... Some people are weird but to each his own. I go to look at cool costumes but mostly comics. It’s called Comic-Con because of the comics.” He flipped through the website. “I thought you might wanna go...but if you’re too cool for it I can go by myself..”

Carl rolled his eyes “Shut up. I’ll go. I’m not dressing up though.”

Ian smiled “You say that now but wait until I tell you my costume. Plus there's a costume contest.”

“Cash prize?”

“Cash prize.”

**

He walked through the crowds of people enjoying the high fives and posing for pictures. Comic-Con. He loved it. New York’s was bigger but this was still pretty intense. The rooms were crowded but not packed and the smell of pizza and chili dogs filled the air.

He decided to be The Riddler.

Mr. Edward Nygma.

He’d always been fond of the character because of how much people underestimated him. They didn’t take a second to think that maybe the smart little lab rat could become their worst nightmare.

He was Nygma. People underestimated him his entire life. It wasn’t until he proved how much of a force he was by working his fuckin ass off to be a big fish, that people took notice. He was always just Terry’s faggot son. The pole smoker, the queer that ran away. Then when he came home with a million dollar company, a self made man, everyone wanted a piece. To bad for him he was a family man, he secretly and not so discreetly wanted his father and Grandfathers approval. He laughed at the thought. That would never happen, they would never approve of his tastes but they sure as hell would respect him. He signed their paychecks, without him the Milkovich name would mean nothing, there would be no legacy.

Here at Comic Con he was able to pretend, to escape into yet another character. You would think two faces would be enough but no...he needed the third. This one was the perfect mix of dominance and whimsy. A balance he couldn’t get a  grasp on in the real world.

His brother Iggy walked beside him dressed at his sidekick Solomon Grundy. Sidekick was pushing it, lets just say both characters liked chaos and in this duo he was brain and Iggy was the muscle.

He was running his fingers over the glass countertop. Below were comics on display, all collectors editions. First prints, autographs...the perfect gift for that special Comic Book lover in his life. “Funny” he smiled and licked his lips.

“What?” Iggy walked behind him and rested his hand on his shoulder “what’s funny?”

He rolled his eyes “nothin man.”

“But you said funny. That means somethin is funny.”

“Holy fuck it was just an expression” Mickey flagged down the owner of the booth then turned to his brother “just thought of somethin in my head that made me laugh. Its comic related, you wouldn’t get it.”

“I’m the Hulk Mickey, I can take anythin you got.”

“Yeeeah...just proved my point Iggs. That's Marvel and you’re Solomon Grundy..” Iggy stared at him blankly. He took in a deep breath “DC...dude come on we went over this.”

“You’re a nerd Mickey.”

“Yea but A rich one.” He pulled out a credit card “go open a tab and I’ll meet up with you.”

Iggy smiled and happily snatched his card before wandering back through the crowd of people.

“Ahem”

He looked to see a man maybe 55, long hair pulled into a ponytail with a Grateful Dead t-shirt staring at him.

“Can I look at that one” He pointed to an Avengers comic in the far corner. From here it looked like it was autographed but he wanted to check. Ian loved the Avengers. He would treat this with respect. The man reached under the counter and pulled out the comic handing him the frame. “Holy shit” he stared in awe. This was cooler than he expected. Ian would have to take somethin else. He wanted this for himself.

“Wow #57 in mint condition, that’s incredible”

He turned to see a man dressed as the Joker and a boy maybe 16 dressed as Penguin. “Yup. It’s autographed by Stan Lee” he replied. “Right fuckin there.”

“Jesus. That’s...wait, Mickey?”

What? He was too enamored with the comic to really give the man more than a quick glance but now the rugged jawline green eyes shown through the white face paint. “Gallagher?” He looked to the younger boy “You must be Carl then.”

“Who are you?”

“I’m Mickey. I…”

“How did you know his name?” Ian looked at his little brother then back up at him “I never told you that.”

He scratched at his neck “Uh yea you did at the bookstore remember?” Please say yes. Please say yes..

“No but I guess it makes sense.” Ian’s eyes moved to the comic in his hands “You’re not really going to buy that are you?”

He looked down and furrowed his brow. Did Ian not like it? “What? Why not? What’s wrong with it?”

Ian grabbed the frame and pushed passed him sitting it on the counter “Excuse me man how much is this going for?”

The man studied the frame then looked between him and Ian “2k$.”

“I’ll take it” he reached for his wallet but Ian smacked his hand.

“It’s a comic Mick.”

“So” he laughed then gestured around “this is fuckin Comic Con Gallagher. Besides I thought you were comic book lover..” he rubbed at his nose. He did mean that slip.

“I...wait what did you say? Did you call me comic book lover?”

He turned back to the man handing him his debit card “You are a comic book lover right? I mean the store, your ringtone…”

“O..oh that” Ian looked away then back at him. “Obviously.”

He nodded “Ok then. I spent enough money this weekend on bullshit, I deserve this.” The man handed him the comic in the frame, boxed up and bagged. He thanked him then turned to Ian. “You want a drink?”

“We should get going actually.” Ian looked at Carl “We entered the costume contest.”

“Iaaan seriously. What the fuck” Carl grumbled and kicked at the ground. 16 going on 6, it was hilarious. “Told you when we got here I changed my mind. I’m not doin it.”

He reached out and patted the boy's shoulder “Come on Carl don’t be a poor sport. You’re lucky to even be here right now.”

“Ok, I can't do this” Ian grabbed his arm and pulled him to the side. “It’s you isn't it?”

He shrugged his shoulders and felt a shy smile cross his lips “what?”

“Don’t play dumb Mickey. It has to be you. You paid that lawyer.”

“Thaat..” he felt a sadness squeezing his heart. He hoped Ian was referring to something else. “What if it was?”

“Jesus Mickey!” Ian stepped back and averted his eyes. “How did you even know?”

“I have my ways.”

“You should have left it alone.” Ian ran his fingers through his green hair causing the paint to flake. “We can’t repay you. This is too much..”

“Breathe Gallagher.” He reached out and touched Ian’s arm. He was surprised when the man did not pull away. “All I did was pay the guy at the dealership. The lawyer was pro bono” he clicked his tongue moving his hand down Ian’s arm slowly and stepping up to him, “family friend. Plus I needed a new car anyways.”

Ian looked away and started laughing. It seemed like laughing, but then he noticed the man's eyes were red and little black lines were appearing on his snow-white painted face. “Why are you cryin man.” He brushed a tear from Ian’s eye getting white on his thumb, that was when Ian pushed him away.

“You can't do this Mickey,” Ian said with a cough his voice cracked. “You can’t..just stop. Please.” Ian turned and walked through the crowd leaving him with his brother.

“Dude” Carl walked by him and squeezed his shoulder “Nice goin. How’d you make him cry? It’s weird.”

He turned to the boy “You never cried before. Fuckin really?”

“I have, just never see him do it.”

“Fuck” he shouted earning a few stares. He breathed in deep. “I’m gonna go find him. Go head over to the bar, there's a dude dressed like Solomon Grundy. Tell him I sent you he’ll buy you a slice and a soda. I’ll be there once I find Ian.

“Sweet.”

He turned and started in the direction that Ian fled his eyes searching for the crowd. He looked and looked but there was no Ian in sight. There were however several jokers just not the one he needed. Fuck! He adjusted his pants. He had to take a piss.

He spotted the bathrooms at the end of the hall. When he walked in he saw several people in a circle and a makeup kit on the counter. He walked to the urinal and did his business. When he approached the counter to wash his hands he looked at the reflection in the mirror and saw the person being fixed up was none other than his runaway love. He walked up to the small group. “I..Ian?”

“Go away Mickey.”

He looked at the men and gestured to the door “you mind?”

“Keep that palet honey. You might need it again.”

The 3 men glared at him then shuffled past and out the door. Ian walked over to the sink to examine his eyeliner and touched up face. “What are you doing Mickey?”

He walked up and leaned against the sink next to Ian “I wanted to make sure you were ok. Kinda freaked out back there Galla..”

“No Mickey!” Ian smacked the counter then turned to look at him, his arms folded across his chest. “That’s not what I mean and you know it. What is this?” He gestured between them “Why are you bein so...why are you bein so nice to me. We’re supposed to hate each other remember.”

He stepped close to Ian so their noses were almost touching “But I don’t hate you Ian.” He grabbed the man's shoulder gently then ran his fingers down his arm “I like you. A lot.”

“Mickey..”

“Ian..” he stepped back “Tell me Gallagher will it kill you not to hate me? Hm?”

Ian glanced away.

“I’ll make you laugh” he stepped up again “I’ll always tell you-you're pretty, besides not bein a doctor I’m the perfect catch.”

“No you’re an idiot” Ian smiled and licked his lip “That’s what you are Mick. Fuckin A.” Ian stepped away and went back to checking his makeup. “I don’t hate you, Milkovich. I should” Ian turned to him “but I don’t and I don’t understand it.”

“Then don’t. Just go with it.”

“Fucking Nike now?” Ian lifted his eyes to the ceiling and blinked several times before meeting his gaze. “How’s my makeup?”

“You look hot.”

“Yea? You like that psycho killer thing I got goin on?”

“Mmhm turnin me on man”

Ian shoved him playfully “Jesus Mick, shut up” he huffed pushing past him.

He was frozen in place watching Ian walk away, his confidence sky high as if he wasn’t just in here crying. He was truly a paramore, he was incredible. He was..

“Mickey!”

He jumped then rubbed at his nose. Was he staring? Did he space out lost in the thought that maybe Ian could be his? “Calm your tit, Gallagher. I’m comin.”

*

When they approached the bar Ian turned to him. “Is that your brother?”

“Yea.”

“I see” Ian mused, “I think since you decided to spoil my day with your company, you two can join us in the costume contest.”

“Not happenin” Iggy called out.

“Yea no fuckin way Gallagher.”

Ian sat down and pouted his lip “Oh well...here I thought you wanted us to be friends” he said over dramatic. “How stupid could I be..”

“Shut the fuck up man. Fine!”

Ian smiled and he felt his heart skip a beat. He would enter 1000 costume contests to see that smile.

“Great! We have to add you to our sign up. We will be the Villains of Arkham.” Ian stood up and started walking fast through the crowd. The man looked over his shoulder and smiled “Come on Mick.”

Chapter Text

It had been a long week. His new job was great, but the deadlines were demanding. He was having the hardest time drawing this stupid comic character, Ella the Wonder Mouse. She was coming out too simple for a superhero, not enough pizzaz. Finally, with the right angles and a few blended shades of pink and gold, the white mouse jumped off the page and he was able to submit the cover to his boss. He hated deadlines. They were something he wasn’t used to having, but with time it would get better. It helped he’d been able to vent to his online lover..or future husband. That could happen. They were so in sync with each other….

He was going to do it, take the leap once again and hope he landed safely. Valentines Day was Friday and what better day to meet with the man of his dreams. That’s what he told himself as he typed the words on his screen.

C0micb00kLov3r: I’m thinking dinner...maybe a movie to end the night. I think it’s time we put the keyboard to rest.

C0micb00kLov3r: What do you say?

He stared at his phone waiting for a response, his stomach was churning and though it was only minutes, they were long and drawn out. He breathed deep and flicked at his nail anxiously awaiting the response. B0$$B0y’s thought bubble populated the screen and he was met with the   …… of a pending message. He couldn’t breathe. What if he said no? He shouldn’t because they talked almost every day but there was still that chance, no matter how small.

B0$$B0y420: I’d like that. How bout Lulu’s? I owe you a date there, don’t I?

His face warmed as a bright crimson spread across his cheeks, he did owe him, didn’t he? The bitterness from multiple cups of coffee followed by the sour taste of rejection from that night still lingered on his tongue. His cyber love had an excuse, but that didn’t make being stood up hurt less. Luckily Mickey had been there to save the night….did he say save it? Hmph..he meant ruin. That night went down in his memory as a huge fail and he hasn’t stepped foot in Lulu’s since.  This is what he wanted though, he needed to take this step. With shaky fingers, he typed his reply.

C0micb00kLov3r: Yeah that sounds great...Lulus it is. 7 pm Friday, sound good?

B0$$B0y420: Peachy. See you then x

**

“Too much?” He looked over at his friend who insisted on watching him prepare for his date. His eyes trailed his reflection in the bathroom mirror as he undid 3 buttons on his grey button-up showing chest.

“It’s just a date, Ian. You look great.”

“It’s not ‘just a date’ Janine. It’s the date. Years in the making and it’s finally here. Let’s not forget it’s Valentine's day, everything has to be just right. ” He looked back to the mirror, “Fuck. I can’t wear this.” He pulled off the shirt tossing it into the pile of bad choices next to him then grabbed a blue striped t-shirt and tossed a denim jacket over it. He turned to Janine, “How about this one?”

“Aces, Ian. You look great!”

He studied his friends face, “Ugh it’s terrible.” He threw the jacket then smacked his counter, “Why is this so fucking hard? I know how to look good, so why is nothing working?”

Janine walked up next to him and squeezed his shoulders, “You’re trying too hard Honey.” She stepped back and gestured over his body, “I mean, look at you. You’re tall, toned, and have a bone structure that most would kill for. You don’t need to be nervous.” He watched as his friend walked over to his closet, “No...no...ah.” She snatched down a shirt then walked back and draped it in front of him “Try this one.”

“It’s boring.”

“But you’re not. Just do it.”

“Fine.” He grabbed the shirt tossing the other one into the reject pile. He pulled it over his head and down his shoulders. It was a simple slate grey henley with ¾ length sleeves. He stepped back and ran his fingers through his red hair, “Not bad,” he laughed, “Think we have a winner.”

Janine pulled her fist down through the air to ring an invisible bell, “Ding Ding Ding!”

He smiled and turned back to the mirror. The shirt fit well, tight at the top but tapered the rest of the way.

He squirted some gel in his hair and combed it through until he had just the right look. After rinsing his hands he grabbed his phone to check the time. It was 5:56 pm he needed to get a move on. He still needed to catch the train. He was about to look up the schedule when a message came through. He clicked it open and his breath stuck in his throat. Not again.

B0$$B0y420: Hey there. I’m sorry to bail on short notice, but I’m stuck at work. It’s gonna be a late night. Raincheck?

He threw his phone on the bed then slumped back against the wall, “Raincheck? Fucking Raincheck Jesus!” He looked at himself in the mirror and rolled his eyes. What a fucking joke.

“Whoa there tiger.” Janine walked over and leaned against the bathroom counter, “What’s wrong?”

“He blew me off that’s fucking what.” He scoffed and tried not to let the tears brimming in his eyes fall. “Not the first time either. Who does that shit? So casual too...just like ‘Raincheck?’ Come on!”

Janine pursed her lips then walked over to his bed and sat down, “At least he texted this time..”

“Yea,” he let out a sigh feeling his anger slowly dissipate, “I guess you're right. He apologized and said he was stuck at work.”

“See,” she handed him his phone and gave him a reassuring smile. “He wanted to see you, not his fault something came up. You know how that goes.”

He scratched at his neck. He did know. He bailed on plans with his family and friends for many late nights of inventory,“I really like this guy Janine.”

“I know you do.”

“I think he could be...the one.”

Janine reached out and touched his chin smoothing her thumb under his jaw “Then you make it work.”

He nodded and opened the messenger on his phone.

C0micb00kLov3r: Raincheck :) How about tomorrow?

B0$$B0y420: Possibly, I’ll get back to you on that. Gtg x

“Unbelievable,” he handed his phone to his friend, “Take it away from me before I say somethin I regret. I’m gonna take a shower and we can order takeout from down the street.

He waited for his friend to leave his room then shut the door falling back against it. Why did he feel so pathetic? Oh yeah...he was chasing a figment of his imagination. What if Mickey was right? What if BossBoy was just some troll trying to fuck with his emotions? “No that’s..,” he stood up straight and wiped a stray tear from his eye. Damn. “Don’t let him get in your head. He is real and he likes you. Things happen...over and over again but that’s just life.” He laughed with frustration as another rogue tear slid down his cheek, “Great. I’m talking to myself now. Jesus Christ.” He walked over to his shower and turned on the water then started to undo his pants. He peeled them off slowly checking out his body in the mirror. He wasn’t conceited but he had a nice body. He took care of himself and hit the gym every day if not every other day. BossBoy was a fucking idiot because he hadn’t been laid in months, who knows what would have happened. It was Valentines Day.

Work? Really?

Whatever. Janine was right. He kicked off his pants trying to focus on the positive aspects of his cyber lover. He was pushing down his boxers when he noticed a face behind him, “Oh my god!”

Janine laughed and shielded her eyes, “Sorry but I thought you might want this. It says Boss on it…”

He quickly pulled up his boxers and snatched the phone from his friend. He had expected to see a new date from BossBoy but instead he saw The Boss, “This isn’t him” he said softly but clicked open the message.

“You know two people who refer to themselves as the Boss?” Janine cocked a brow, “That’s a little weird don’t you think?”

He folded his arms and scoffed, “No. The guy I like is BossBoy, this is Mickey and he’s The Boss . There’s a difference.”

Janine shrugged her shoulders, “If you say so, maybe put Mickey so it will be less confusing to simple minds like mine”

“He put it in there, not me.” He thought back to that day at the cafe. It was actually a nice date...day. It wasn’t a date. Never. He told himself that over and over, he just bought Mickey a coffee. That’s it…

“So...you going to answer or..”

“What? Oh.” He looked down at his phone and read the message.

The Boss (6:25 pm) Douchebag bailed on me again. Wanna grab a beer?

“He wants to get beers.” He searched his friends face for an answer but she only stared back at him expectantly. They were at a standstill, “What should I say?”

Janine clicked her tongue, “What do you think Ian? You should mope around here and eat take out with your best friend, obviously.”

He nodded, that made sense. Why would he even consider going out with Mickey on Valentines Day? It was out of the question. “Ok.” He went to text a reply when his phone was ripped away from his hands, “What the hell?”

“Don’t be stupid. Mickey is hot, go have a drink.”

He bunched up his nose in over dramatic disgust, “Mickey is not….hot, not at all. He’s just a friend. Kind of.”

“A hot friend is the best kind.”

He smiled and rolled his eyes. His friend saw right through him “Whatever. So he’s a little hot. He’s still an asshole.”

“Again...the problem is?”

He threw up his hands then walked over and shut off the shower. He reached down for his jeans then sat on the counter and pulled them over his legs, “I know he’s your boss now so you have some kind of employee loyalty but he and I will never happen.”

“You’re loss.” Janine stood up straight and walked up to him, “Seriously though...you should go.” She ran her fingers through his hair, “Let yourself have some fun, Ian. That was the plan to start with, the only thing that’s changed is the person.”

He swatted his friend's hand away “And the plan. This is beers. Plain and simple, not a date.”

“Aye Aye captain. Call it what you want, just text him back before he changes his mind.” She pressed his phone against his chest with a gentle shove then stepped away and walked out the door.

Gallagher (6:40 pm) Same place?

The Boss (6:41 pm) 431 N Agate St, Chicago, IL 60654

That was like 45 minutes from where he was if he took the train. Why did Mickey have to pick a bar so far? This was stupid. He pushed the call button and waited.

“Sup Gallagher?”

“Let’s just meet at the place by the gym. They had good beer…. and we can play pool.”

“Nope. This place is better. Trust me.”

He pinched his nose and walked over to the bed to sit down. He was not going to go then. It was simple. Why should he spend the time and money to go hang out with someone he barely liked anyway?

“That’s ok. Thanks for the invite but it’s too far for me. You enjoy your night and I’ll enjoy mine.”

“Why not just Uber there?”

“Contrary to popular belief Mick I’m not made of money like you.” He rolled onto his stomach and started to pick at his comforter “ Don’t want to go out anyways. I had plans for tonight and they went to shit.”

“Then come out with me.”

His legs bounced against the bed as he thought about it, was it worth the trip? Mickey had been fun to hang with at the convention but he also had Carl there. It didn’t matter, that bar was on the other side of town. If he had a car then maybe but he doesn’t. So here we are. “ Pick a closer place.”

“No. Just say yes.”

Whatever schoolgirl moment he was having was gone. Mickey was so unreasonable, “You know what? Drink by yourself, I’ll be here.” He pulled the phone away and was second from disconnecting the call when he heard Mickey’s voice.

“Wait...Ian? Ian?”

He rolled on his back again and closed his eyes the phone pressed to his ear. “What, Mickey?”

“I meant why not use the Uber I ordered. It should be there in like 5 minutes.”

He sat up quickly and rushed to the bathroom putting his phone on speaker “What? I…. 5 minutes Mick! Are you kidding me?”

“Shoulda said yes faster. Better hurry up, don’t wanna be late.”

Mickey hung up the phone leaving him in a stun stooper. This was typical Mickey. He was already dressed so he ran a comb through his hair and spritzed on some body spray. Please don’t let this be a disaster.

**

The UBER stopped in front of a large building with cursive red letters, “Rose Charlies?” He looked at the driver then back to the building. There was a man at a valet booth in a white button up and black slacks, this wasn’t a bar. “Uh this isn’t right. I’m looking for a bar? You know like a sports bar...maybe a tavern.”

The driver turned and looked at him “431 N Agate St?”

“Yea but…”

“This is the spot dude. I can take you to a bar if you want but this is the address I was given.”

He rubbed both of his temples in disbelief “ok. Thanks.” He climbed out of the car trying not to slam the door behind him but he was annoyed. He walked in the front door and was greeted by a young women in a red dress and black jacket.

“Mr. Gallagher?”

He looked around the room taking in the ambience. There was a chandelier above the host station and all the tables were black with white table runners and red napkins  folded like fans. This was leagues away from a bar. He could see there was a bar in the back, but this was an upscale chophouse not a sports bar. He took in a deep breath turning back to the hostess “That’s me. How did you know?”

“Mr. Milkovich gave us a description. My name is Tanya, welcome to Rose Charlies. Right this way.”

He followed Tanya thought the dimly lit restaurant filled with people eating steak and scallops. She walked him through a row of black booths until he saw Mickey sitting there talking on the phone. Mickey must have noticed him approaching because by the time he reached the table he was off the phone and standing up.

“Marcus will be your server this evening and he will be with you gentleman shortly.”

“Thanks Tanya. Can you have the bar send over a pitcher of uh..Miller Lite and two glasses.”

“Sure thing, Mr. Milkovich.”

He watched in aw as the woman smiled then walked off leaving the two of them standing. He sat down slowly trying to think of what to say.

“You look good Gallagher. You get all dressed up for little ol me?”

He glanced away then back at Mickey, “If you must know I was stood up.” He reached for the water glass and took a sip, “Again.”

“Hmph.” Mickey sat down and leaned back in his seat studying him, “Sucks for that guy. Look at you. Who would waste time with work when they could have all this,” he gestured over his body. “Guy must be straight or fuckin dumb.”

Mickey was trying to be charming. The mans lips were curled up revealing his pearly white smile, soft and seductive..it was distracting. He laughed then paused scratching at his neck, something about Mickey never added up, “I didn’t say he had to work. I said he stood me up again.”

Mickey leaned forward and rested his arms on the table before taking a sip from his water. He set the glass down then rubbed at his nose his blue eyes firmly locked on him, “Yeah you didn’t but why the fuck else would he ditch you?”

He didn’t want to think about the reasons why. His head would start naming off reason after reason for why he didn’t deserve love, why BossBoy didn’t want to meet with him. He tucked down his emotions and cleared his throat, “It doesn’t matter.” He sat back in his seat and picked at the underside of the table afraid to even continue the conversation. This was unexpected, his night went an entirely different direction and this was FAR from the beers and pool he anticipated. “What matters is whatever the fuck this is?” His eyes darted around the dimly lit room then landed back on the raven haired man. He was so caught up in the ambience, he didn’t have a chance to take in what Mickey was wearing. There were times more often than not that Mickey came off as pretentious and over confident, however, seeing him now in his designer black leather jacket with a simple white t-shirt, a rolex, and several rings over his tattooed fingers he looked handsome, hot. Too hot. “This is not a date” he blurted out.

“Real smooth Gallagher.” Mickey laughed and sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. “I never said it was.”

“I know but you in…”

“Welcome to Rose Charlies. My name is Marcus. Here is your pitcher of Bud Light, two glasses. Can I get you two started with an appetizer? I recommend the stuffed mushrooms or the Veal Osso Bucco Raviolis, I had them for lunch and they were amaazing.”

“Can you ask the chef if he can make us like a sample plater of everythin?”

“Of course. I’ll be back shortly.”

Mickey nodded then turned back to him “Just two friends havin dinner. You eat dinner right?”

He rolled his eyes “Yea Mick, this is like a 4 star restaurant. We could ‘eat dinner’ anywhere.”

“You deserved a nice dinner after workin so hard this week.” Mickey grabbed the pitcher and poured a glass passing it across the table. “You don’t have to fight me every step of the way Ian. I like the chase but I always win.”

There it was again. How did Mickey know he had a hard week? They hadn’t talked about his week. They started to text more but mainly about comic books. He was actually surprised at how much of a geek Mickey really was under his business facade. “It was a long week” he replied finally. “I barely made the deadline for the cover of Captain Crash Bang Boom.”

Mickey laughed nearly spitting on the table. “Crash Bang Boom huh? What kind of name is that?”

“It’s a children's comic. He’s an Elephant with superpowers but he’s really clumsy. Always making a mess wherever he goes until Ella…”

“The mouse, cute.”

“Ellas a mou..wait. Seriously how did you know that?” He pushed away his beer and folded his arms. “Are you fucking spying on me? Are you like tapping my phone?”

“What? No. Why would you ask that Gallagher? I’m in the business too. I heard about it.”

“From who?”

“Don’t matter.”

Mickey smiled at him and whatever suspicions he had continued to jump around his brain. He tried to push them away but every other word coming from the man across from him just made his body tingle. It was like he was sitting there visiting with someone else. That was impossible but this was too easy. It was always easy with Mickey now that they weren’t competitors. He was the one that made it difficult, like Mickey said he tried to fight the chemistry that was there because it hurt his heart to think he could ever EVER have feeling for someone like Mickey. He was the epitome of all the things he hated about corporate America. If he was attracted to the man what would that say about him? He felt like he would be losing all over again, only this time it would be his values and his pride...not his store. He needed to stop overthinking. He just wanted to have a good night and drown out this week. “You’re right, Mick. It doesn’t matter. Thanks for inviting me out.”

“Thank you for comin.” Mickey ran his finger in a circle around the rim of his glass with a thoughtful look on his face before taking another sip. “I come here often. It’s my favorite steakhouse. They have the best fried calamari. Fuckin delicious.”

“Calamari?” His lips curled up into a small smile, “I didn’t see you as the fish eating type. You seem more like a steak and potatoes guy.”

Mickey raised a brow and licked his lips, “Oh yeah? Why’s that?”

He shrugged his shoulder and stared into crystal blue eyes, “I don’t know, just do.”

“What do you like? What does Ian Gallagher eat for sustenance?”

Sustenance? He laughed and rolled his eyes. What a fucking dork. “Well, I’m not big on fried anything really. I like sauteed Calamari sometimes but I prefer sushi. Veggies are good too. I like roasted root vegetables, like broccoli or cauliflower. I love roasted squash. Any kind of salad except pasta salads, I like lighter foods...Hey!”

Mickey’s eyes popped open and he sat up straight. “Oh wait what were you sayin?”

Rude. Mickey eyes had dropped until the were finally closed with an overdone snore.

Mickey yawned, “I’m sorry but that was so fuckin borin I fell asleep.”

“You’re the one who asked.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you ate like a fuckin bird. You gotta let your hair down Gallagher, have a cheeseburger now and then..”

“I’m not a bird thank you. I like lots of things I just like to take care of myself.

“You worry to much man. You’re in great shape. The muffin top is hardly noticeable.”

“What? I do not” He jumped up and looked at his stomach touching it, Mickey was laughing. “That’s not very nice asshole. Stop worrying about my muffin top and maybe think about getting that nose fixed.”

“What this?” Mickey ran his finger down the length of his nose “All the better to smell that bullshit. Just wait, the food here is gonna knock you off that perch. You’re gonna love it.”

As if summoned Marcus appeared carrying 3 plates of food. The aroma of garlic, and spinach, butter and cheese, it all mixed in his nose tantalizing his taste buds.

He reached for a piece of grilled artichoke and took a bite causing his mouth to orgasm. He started to make himself a plate, tasting

a little of everything. The appetizers were decadent and plentiful as they continued to be placed one by one on the table until there was barely any room left. The coconut shrimp was juicy and the lobster fondue with the house bread melted in his mouth.

He let Mickey do most of the talking because his brain was on overdrive. He sat there picking pieces from various plates and soaked in everything Mickey had to say. With every word and blue eyed glance, he found it harder to accept the distance between them. He was learning things he never expected. Mickey told him once he made himself who he was today but he thought he was referring to the devious shark that he was known for being. As he used a small fork to skewer a stuffed mushroom and Mickey told him about his life in New York he realized he was wrong. Mickey really did come from nothing.

“So then I moved out here.” Mickey downed the rest of his beer and flagged down the server for their 3rd refill. He didn’t usually drink beers, he was more of a wine person, vodka occasionally but he was enjoying himself.

“That’s incredible. I can’t believe you lived 5 minutes away from me and we never met.”

“The world is a funny place Gallagher.” Mickey took a bite of a scallop and chewed with a thoughtful look. “Who knows how things woulda been if we had.”

“Yeah,” He pushed his mushrooms around with his fork before stabbing another “Who knows.”

“Told you.” Mickey raised a brow and reached a fork out stealing a piece of Calamari from his plate then went in for another, “You thought you knew me, you didn’t. Still think I’m the big bad wolf?”

He blocked Mickey’s fork with his own, “No..hey stop it.” He laughed and pulled back his plate “Eat your own food.”

Mickey pouted his lip “But I ate all mine and you got the rest. Don’t be stingy.”

“Stingy! You’re made of money order more.”

Mickey shrugged his shoulders, “But I want yours.”

He couldn’t help it. He took his fork and grabbed up the last two pieces of Calamari. He popped one into his mouth watching as Mickey gave him a tipsy lopsided smile. “There’s only one left.”

“Eat it then.”

Mickey sat back and Marcus came by with a new pitcher that they really didn’t need. If what he was about to do next was any indication of how inebriated he was, they should be cut off. “Mm no.” He turned his fork around and held it in front of Mickey’s face. “You have it.”

“Don’t want it now.” Mickey reached for their glasses and poured another round. “Probably better, it would ruin my girlish figure.”

He rolled his eyes and waved the fork in Mickey’s face, “Eaaat it.”

Mickey chuckled and pushed his fork away with his own, “Don’t tell me what to do, Gallagher. I’m the Boss remember?”

He reached for his beer and took a long swig. Mickey couldn’t be more wrong. He’d thought about it and now was almost certain from that coy smile that he could bend him over tonight. Blunt but true. When he found out Mickey was a bottom he thought it was a lie. He had to much bravado but that was just him being ignorant. He needed sex and Janine was right. Mickey was hot and willing, the guy took him on a date the least he could do was fuck him. Hopefully. Maybe then he could figure out what it was he was feeling.  “Ah” he licked his lips and his lips pulled into a provocative grin, his eyes locked on Mickey.“Oh yeah, Boss boy? You begged for it now take it.”

Mickey stopped and a smile split across his face that warmed his body. That look aroused him, it made his heart skip a beat, “Look at you Mick. All I did was call you Boss and you lit up like a jack o lantern,”

“It was more than that,” Mickey’s cheeks were reddening as he shifted in his seat. “You know it.”

He dropped the fork and leaned in, “Can I tell you a secret?”

“hm?”

He grabbed Mickey’s hand that was resting on the table “You don’t know it” he whispered, “But, I’m the boss not you. Me.”

Mickey gave him a confused look and he swore he saw the disappointment in his eyes. Why? He was so drunk he probably sounded like an idiot. That was ok though. Mickey wasn’t picking up on his signals even though he felt he was wearing his thirst like a neon sign. He would just have to surprise him, no way Mickey would turn him down. The guy wants him, it’s obvious. Mickey was going to pay for this lovely over priced dinner then they would take an UBER to his apartment and he would show Mickey once and for all HE was the boss.

Chapter Text

Mickey stepped out of the car and held the door open for his date. Ian said it wasn’t a date but the man was fooling himself, deep down they both knew the truth. The younger man had spent the evening laughing, blushing and sharing stories with him like they’d known each other for years. Technically Ian did know him he just didn’t know it yet.

Ian looked over his shoulder, a tipsy smile beaming across his face. He was ready. Sitting across from Mickey all night had been torture. The man was very attractive and when he wasn’t being an arrogant egomaniac, he was fun to be around. They were able to talk tonight and get to know each other to a point where he wouldn’t completely hate himself for sleeping with him. Friends with benefits….people still do that kind of thing don’t they?
He was about to, He turned around and locked eyes with Mickey who seemed lost in deep thought, “Come upstairs” he said with a giggle as he reached out and grabbed his hand.

He looked Ian up and down then averted his eyes to the sidewalk. He wanted to. He wanted to take the redheads hand and never look back, just not like this. Ian was so drunk he was wobbling as he stood in place. He wasn’t thinking clearly. He didn’t need to add taking advantage to the list of reasons Ian already had not to trust him. “Not tonight,” He pulled out his phone ready to order another car to take him home. He could have just sent Ian home alone but he didn’t want to.

Ian watched as Mickey looked away and groaned. Just follow him, It wasn’t that hard. He had to want this as much as he did if not more. Mickey was the one that concocted this stupid evening leading them to this moment. “Seriously Mick. Pretty please?”

Ian’s pink lips were in a full on pout. He looked like a puppy waiting to be rewarded for his good behavior and he was the treat. Goosebumps flooded his skin as he took in the fact that Ian’s fingers were intertwining with his, Ian’s lust and alcohol-fueled eyes were boring into him causing his heart to flutter. “No Gallagher. You’re drunk.”

He yanked Mickey and the man stumbled forward putting his hand against his chest to keep from toppling over,“You’re fuckin drunk too!”

Mickey’s face broke into a small grin. He was pretty fuckin tipsy. He felt like he was walking on a cloud.“I know” he laughed standing up straight, “ That doesn’t matter thought. Just go sleep it off and call me tomorrow?” It was more of a question, he was hoping that a sober Ian might still want his company.

Ian scoffed and ran his fingers through his hair. The one time he wants Mickey company he is treating him like a child. This wasn’t his first rodeo, he just had a lower tolerance. “Don’t insult me Mickey.” He narrowed his eyes slightly before grabbing Mickey’s waist and holding him flush against his body. “I might be drunk, but I’m a fucking adult. “ He reached up and traced Mickey’s lips with his finger then leaned down and sucked his earlobe into his mouth. “If I tell you I want you to come upstairs” he whispered, “Then you come upstairs, don’t stand there and make up excuses.”

His breath hitched as Ian’s warm breath tickled at his skin. Was he going to do this? Slowly he looked up taking in Ian’s hunger filled eyes. He licked at his lips and thumbed his nose, “Ian” he paused then looked away upset that once again he was finding a reason to say no. “I don’t want you to regret…”

“Jesus Christ Mick…” Ian grabbed Mickey’s hand roughly then turned pulling him towards the security door. He needed to take charge if Mickey was going to take him seriously. After months of not getting laid and the surprisingly incredible evening, he was feeling frisky. Why not? They were both consenting adults. Mickey needed to stop reading into it. He put in his code then they walked inside and over to the elevator.
Once the door closed he caged Mickey against the wall. His heart was thumping against his chest as he stared at blue eyes and pink lips soft and tempting.

The walls seemed to be closing in on him under Ian’s gaze. He thought about lunging forward and attacking his lips but Ian had the same look on his face, he wanted him to make the first move. That would keep his conscience clean. Ian’s strong hands held him tight but the younger man only stared into his eyes studying him. It was torture. “You uh...you gonna kiss me?”

A cat-like grin split across Ian’s face as he lifted a hand and combed his fingers through Mickey's black hair watching it effortlessly thread through his fingers, “You want me too?”

“Why else would I be here?”

“Good point.”

Ian leaned in the heat from his breath tickled his lips but before they could close the distance they were interrupted by the loud ding of the elevator followed by the soft sound of crying. Ian pushed off of him and rushed from the elevator. He took a deep breath trying to steady his breathing and calm himself down. That was hot and now Ian was just gone. No kiss, just ran out of the elevator. He was afraid this would happen. He should just close the elevator door and go home, save himself more rejection and embarrassment. He ran the pads of his fingers over the silver button letting them linger on GROUND.

He turned around expecting to see Mickey behind him but instead the man was standin in the elevator looking confused. He ran down the hall and stopped in front of the elevator, “Why are you standing there come on!”

Ian was staring at him with a raised brow a sense of urgency in his voice.
“I thought you…” he shifted feeling very confused, “You ran out man. What was I sposed to think?” Ian rolled his eyes then grabbed his hand again leading him from the elevator and down the hall to his apartment.
The crying sound from earlier grew louder as they turned the corner. It was only then that he discovered the source. Leaning against Ian’s door in a crumpled crying mess was a girl no more than 15 or 16. The freckled skin and red hair were identical to Ian’s and he knew immediately from their online love affair who this was. He walked up to the girl and touched her shoulder causing her to look up, her red and wet with tears, “You must be Ian’s sister Debbie. I heard a lot of good things about you. I’m Mickey.”

He pursed his lips and pondered Mickey’s words. He couldn’t think of a conversation they had tonight or at all that involved his little sister. “I’ve talked about Fiona, not Debbie.” He unlocked his door and the 3 walked through.

“Nah man. I’m sure you told me she was your favorite.”

“I..is that true?” The young girl smiled wiping her eyes “Am I your favorite?”

No he didn’t! How did Mickey always know so much about him? He knew money was power but sometimes he felt like maybe Mickey was stalking him. It was a stupid thought that normally passed, honestly it was flattering but sometimes like now it just made him feel crazy. He had enough things doing that on a daily basis he didn’t need another one. He glared at Mickey but then his eyes softened and he walked up to Debbie wrapping his long arms around her. “Course it is Debs. You’re the baby.”

“Not uh. Liam is the baby.”

Mickey laughed, “That don’t matter kiddo. You’re his baby sister, that makes you the baby. The favorite. Trust me I know. I got a sister too.” He took off his jacket and hung it over the kitchen chair. “Names Mandy. She’s a real pain in my ass but I’d kill for her.”

Debbie walked over to the couch and sat down pulling her legs up underneath her. “Would you do that Ian? Would you kill for me?”

“Way to go Mickey. Now she wants me to murder someone.”

He walked over to where the girl was sitting and gently sat down beside her. “Why you cryin kiddo hm? Who made you cry?”

Debbie wiped her eyes then looked at Mickey, “It’s my fault. I was too clingy and I texted too much maybe. It’s not his fault.”

“His?” Mickey sat up straight and cracked his knuckles. He looked up briefly at Ian who was leaning against the counter watching them. “What did he do? Tell me.”

“He dumped meeehee” Debbie turned and buried her face in his shoulder, tears streaming down her face. “W..were supposed to go o..out tonight then he canceled and..and I got mad and told him just forget it and..and he said fiiine it’s over.”

He watched Mickey comfort his sister and felt a warmth flow through his body. It was sweet. He walked over and sat on the other side of the couch with the pair. “Aww Debs, that’s not your fault Sis. Guys are dumb.” He petted Debbie's back as she sobbed into Mickey’s shoulder. “Trust me I know. I got stood up tonight too.”

The pain in Ian’s eyes was evident as he spoke. He thought maybe their date would replace whatever he was hoping for with BossBoy but for a second he thought the younger boy might cry.
“Yeah, but he had an excuse..” He looked around Debbie locking eyes with Ian, “Isn’t that what you said? So it’s different, you got rescheduled. This guy though, he sounds like an asshole who needs his ass kicked. Plain and simple.”

“It’s not different” Ian countered surprised that Mickey had gone from fuck that guy to his defense. “Not at all. Excuse or not it’s still a dick move and it still makes you question if you’re good enough.” Ian rubbed Debbie's back then looked at Mickey with his designer watch and perfect fucking smile, “Something you know nothing about.” He was getting off topic. How could he go from wanting to fuck Mickey to throttling him in less than 5 minutes? Guy probably never had to deal with rejection, not like they had. He looked back to his sister and gave a small hopefully convincing smile. “Guess what Debs, it’s his loss. We are amazing people and you are beautiful. That boy is going to regret that he ever stood you up. You’re going to find something better..” Ian’s voice lowered almost as if he wasn’t talking to his sister but to himself. “Love comes when you don’t look for it. Someone out there will love you for you.” As he spoke he tried to believe the words, Debbie was young and naive. She still had so many of life's first to experience. He, on the other hand, had been there and done that. It felt like maybe, his time had come and gone.

“Because you’re beautiful” Mickey added eyes locked on Ian as he soothed himself and his sister.

“What?” He leaned forward and his eyes met with Mickey’s. The man was staring at him in a way that made him wonder what he was missing. Had it not been just the 3 of them in the room then he would assume there was a masterpiece standing behind him, but that wasn’t the case. No, that look was directed at him.
He rubbed at his nose and reached out to touch Ian’s hand that was resting on Debbies' legs, “Said your beautiful.”

Mickey’s hand lingered on his leaving him feeling faint. He wasn’t sure what was happening but he was positive it wasn’t the alcohol. He looked back to his sister and smoothed a thumb over her cheek, “Yeah, you’re beautiful.”

“Smart”

“Funny”

“And you deserve to be loved. Never forget that.” Mickey pulled his hand back and wrapped his arms around Debbie. His skin brushed against Ian’s and he tried his bests to keep his focus on anything but the warmth of their touch as they each held Debbie in a comforting embrace. He leaned his head on Debbies, “You wanna watch a movie?”

“No” Debbie sniffed. She sat up and wiped at her eyes, “Can I have a cookie?”

“Cookie?” Mickey licked his lips, “What cookie?”

Ian laughed then stood up from the couch, “She means the cookies I baked for my date.” He made his way into the kitchen and came back with a red box. It only took him 3 hours but no big deal. He had a whole after date scenario planned but right now he didn’t want to think about that. This moment here and now is where he wanted to be. He sat down and pulled off the lid. “It’s nothing fancy. I added Valentine m&ms and some almonds. Help yourself.”

Mickey stared at Ian in amazement. Cookies? Did he bake for him? Not really but technically he did. This guy was sweeter than the candy pieces in, “They look good” he reached in for a cookie but stopped when his fingers crossed with Ian's’, “Go ahead.”

“No, it’s ok.”

“O..ok” He quickly grabbed two cookies and sat back. He took a bite then glanced at Ian who was staring right back. His heart was pounding against and he felt like such an ass wishing that Debbie wasn’t there. She was though and probably staying overnight. He popped the rest of the cookie from his mouth then stood up, “I had a good time tonight, I think I should go.”

“Why do you wanna go?” Debbie looked at Mickey then back at her brother “Oh my god are you on a date? Did I ruin it.” The girls' eyes filled with tears again. “I can’t believe of course you are. It’s Valentine's Day.”

“Debbie no..”

Ian gave him a deadly look that screamed ‘sit the fuck down’.
“You didn’t ruin anythin” he added obeying Ian unspoken command. “This..” he gestured between the two of them, “We..this wasn’t a date. Right, Gallagher?”

He hesitated because truth be told, yes. This was not only a date but the best one he’d been on. It was amazing and he couldn’t believe that it was with someone who long ago he claimed to hate. “Right” he replied walking behind where Mickey was sitting on the couch. He reached down and gripped his shoulders feeling the need to touch. “Mickey and I are just two friends hanging out. You can stay here as long as you want.”

Chapter Text

It used to feel like he was glued to his phone. It was either in his hand or on a table or countertop close by. He didn’t use social media much, Twitter just wasn’t his cup of tea. Anytime he tried, he either offended somebody or was offended himself. It wasn’t worth the hassle. As for Facebook and Instagram, he didn’t need it. To him social media was like an obligation to be always available and to be honest, he didn’t have the time to keep up with such things.

There was only one reason he was engrossed with the tiny black screen in his hand, and that was B0$$B0y420, at least it used to be.

It started shortly after Valentines Day. As predicted, the date had yet to be rescheduled because his cyber lover was always too busy. The thing is now he was busy too. He had work sure, but what took up the majority of his free time was an anomaly, something that he never expected to happen. Not in a million years. When he reached for the phone it wasn’t to check on what B0$$B0y had for lunch or how his day was, instead he was talking to Mickey.

Yeah, that’s right. Mickey Milkovich.

The arrogant, self-proclaimed millionaire was the one lighting up his phone these days. Who would have guessed they had so many things in common apart from the obvious? Mickey’s clothes sometimes were more expensive than his apartment yet the guy could sit there eating Hamburger Helper and play Nintendo 64 with him for hours. They could binge watch South Park and Mickey was showing him the joy of old gangster movies. B0$$B0y made his heart flutter at the thought of meeting him. He gave him butterflies in the stomach and a floaty feeling when he would say just the right thing but with Mickey it was different. They were spending more and more time together and that sinking feeling that was in the pit of his stomach when they crossed paths at the gym had long been replaced by a warm, relaxing feeling that made spending time with Mickey…..comfortable.

Hmm..

This was too confusing, his brain and his heart were playing tug of war and he didn’t and all he could do was wait for the outcome. He felt like some old classic rock song, Torn between two lovers only he didn’t love Mickey…did he? He hoped the side glances and the gentle touches were just in his mind. He wasn’t falling for Mickey. He couldn’t. He’d grown to see a sweeter side of the man but there was still a sourness that would creep in like a bad aftertaste and he could honestly say he didn’t know if or when it would ever go away.

He heard the buzz of his phone and put down his color pencils grabbing it off the coffee table. He clicked open the message.

The Boss (9:15 am) You know what’s fuckin stupid? Workin with your family. Why purposefully put yourself in a stressful fuckin situation if you can avoid it. I should fire my Dad & Charlie. Homophobic pricks always talkin shit

He laughed lightly and leaned back in his chair typing away.

Gallagher (9:17 am) It’s your company, Mick. You shouldn’t have to deal with that bullshit.

Mickey had complained to him several times in the last week about his father. He was an asshole always commenting about how Mickey was a fag but it was ok because he made money. His grandfather was the worst, which was no surprise considering what he had heard about Terry. Charlie was old, racist, homophobic, just a nasty bundle of intolerance. He had a lot of hate for a little of everything.

The Boss (9:20 am) Yeah but you don’t know my family. They would never speak to me again.

Gallagher (9.22am) And that’s a bad thing? I’m confused. They’re a bunch of old assholes Mick. You don’t need them.

The Boss (9:25 am) Says the family man….You’d think that but they’re all I got lol. Gtg see you tonight? 7:30?

Gallagher (9:30 am) I’ll order the pizza you bring the beers. That place on Lawrence has a good selection of IPAs, maybe something floral

The Boss (9:33 am) Floral?? Fuckin pussy .(:

The Boss (9:34 am) I’ll get your fruity fuckin beer...

He smiled, he didn’t know what it was they were doing. There was no way they could be together. Forget the fact that Mickey single-handedly destroyed his mother's legacy, they were just different. Mickey was rich, and that was being modest. His clothes, his watches, his cars. Everything. His lifestyle was not something he would ever be into. He liked his South Side roots, he was proud to be thrifty. How would a bargain shopper and someone who owns Armani gym shorts be compatible?

Mickey was slowly becoming his best friend. It was more than he expected and Mickey knew about his bipolar. He’d helped him through it, so for that, he earned bonus points. As long as he kept that mentality of ‘just friends’ everything would be ok. That meant he needed to figure out what B0$$B0y wanted. Did he want a relationship or a glorified pen pal?

The fact they had chosen to meet several times and something always came up was really starting to bother him. B0$$B0y was his soulmate, he could feel it in his bones but….maybe that was wishful thinking. Either way, he was giving him one last chance. They needed to meet. No delays, no excuses.

**

“Come on Mickey” Debbie whined looking at him with a pout on her lip. “It’s my turn, you’ve played 3 songs!”

He laughed and paused the intro credits. “Yeah because I advanced each time. I can’t help if I’m a badass Debs.”

Ian scoffed and he turned to look at him “Got somethin you wanna say, Gallagher?”

“Mmm just that you're not as amazing as you think, I can play on Expert and you Mick, are only on Hard.”

He raised a brow and a cocky grin spread across his face “Is that right? Care to test that theory?”

“Wait,” Debbie stepped in front of the TV “That’s no fair it’s MY turn!”

“Calm the fuck down Peppermint Patty, here.” He handed the guitar to the girl and folded his arms. “Enjoy it while it last cause after I kick your brothers' ass, I’m gonna beat this game.”

Debbie slipped the strap over her shoulders and pulled her hair up into a ponytail “Not if I beat it first” She put on her song and Korn’s Freak on A Leash started to play.  After the first verse, he had to cover his ears. She sucked, there was no nice way of putting it.

“I thought you said this was your favorite game” he shouted holding his hands over his ears. Every other chord was wrong and the song was being butchered.

“I just need to warm up” Debbie called back her fingers moving fast over the buttons and her eyes glued to the screen, “I always suck in the beginning just wait.”

News flash, the song was almost over. He looked over at Ian who laughed and shrugged his shoulders. He returned his attention back to Debbie and shook his head. “You missed the whammy!”

“Yeah, I don’t do those they’re too hard. I just like to focus on the chords.”

He was about to say something when the crowd decided for him.  The loud sound of jeering boos filled the room.

“You did good Debs.” Ian walked over and grabbed the guitar from his sisters' hands. “You got further than last time and this mode was harder. You just gotta work on the endin a little more, then you got it. Practice makes perfect.”

“Yeah, soon you’ll be able to beat your brother too” he boasted. “ You ready Gallagher?”

Ian lifted the shoulder strap over his head and walked up next to him. He grabbed the other guitar from the couch.

“You talk a big game, Mick, let’s see what you got.”

“I can walk the walk man, don’t worry bout that. I was just warmin up.” He clicked through the songs and chose No Sleep Till Brooklyn on Expert.

“Beastie Boys,” Ian smiled and lightly tapped his fingers against the buttons,“Good choice. Classic.”

“Fuck yeah it is.” He took a deep breath and steadied his fingers. He got into his playing stance and Ian did the same. The countdown began and then it was on.

Red, green, yellow repeat, repeat

The song was playing perfectly. Ian was playing in sync with him and it was starting to make his heart warm. He knew this song like the back of his hand so he was able to look over and watch as Ian’s fingers moved in perfect time along with the silent words escaping his lips. Fuck it, why have a competition when they could just rock together? “Look at you go Gallagher” he cheered as they passed the 50 note streak and unlocked star power.  “NO SLEEP TILL..”

Ian’s mouth split into a smile wide enough he thought his face would crack. He had a beautiful smile. “ BROOKLYN!” Ian moved his fingers and bobbed his head to the beat “Everyone knows the chorus Mick, how about the rest of the song?”

“That a challenge Gallagher?”

Ian’s eyes lit up as they played the rest of the chorus then to his surprise the redhead sang

“ Foot on the pedal,

Never ever false metal

Engine running hotter than a boiling kettle

My job ain't a job

It's a damn good time

City to city I'm running my rhymes. ”

Ian winked at him and he knew it was his turn

“ On location

Touring around the nation

Beastie Boys always on vacation

Itchy trigger finger

But a stable turntable

I do what I do best

Because I'm willing and able. ”

They went back and forth singing and playing in harmony. They probably looked like a bunch of idiots but he didn’t care. It was like he and Ian were the only ones in the room and his heart was about to explode. The chorus came and he turned to Ian their fingers clicking away but their eyes locked on each other

“NO SLEEP TILL BROOKLYN” he leaned back getting into the song and enjoying the moment. “NO SLEEP TILL BROOKLYN!”

“Nice man” Ian was dancing and rocking with his guitar. He was laughing and singing along, both of them still hitting every note.

When the whammy’s came they rocked out together. They were all over the place dancing and singing, eyes floating from each other to the screen and back again. Not at all what he expected when he started the round but he wouldn’t trade it for the title of winner.

The was far better than winning, this was fate putting the pieces back together.

****

Here he was again studying himself in the mirror. how many times was this? He and B0$$B0y were supposed to meet by the bleachers at his old high school, apparently, his cyber lover played baseball too when he was in high school. He never asked B0$$B0y how old he was but it would be crazy if they were on the same team. Before his date, though he was meeting Mickey for coffee.

He was tempted to cancel.

He couldn’t tell who he was getting ready for. He’d spent 20 minutes on just his hair and another 30 picking out his outfit, no peanut gallery this time. He had told himself over and over, repeated the mantra in his head that he and the suave millionaire were just friends but his heart was calling him a liar. At night it would keep him awake analyzing every smile and slight touch of the hand from the raven-haired businessman. Mickey liked him, that was obvious from the day they met. Even when they were rivals the attraction was palatable.

So then why meet for coffee? If all went well he would have lunch with his online love and then take him back home for dinner and dessert. Don’t even get him started on that. It had been 8 months since he and Craig parted ways. He could easily go out to the bar and find someone to take home but he wasn’t about that life, not anymore. He’d only wanted a quick fuck once and that was because he was ditched on fucking Valentine’s Day.

Hmmm. What a day.

It started so bleak and ended with him and Mickey nearly crossing that line. That would have made things complicated. like they weren’t now. He laughed to himself then gave his body several spritz of cologne. Here goes nothing.

**

He sat at the bar staring out the window. When Ian told him he wanted to meet here his stomach fluttered at the memory. That was a good day, some (meaning he) might even call that their first date. It was only fitting that he spilled the news to Ian someplace where they could create more memories.

He wondered if Ian knew.

The days of accidental hints were long gone and he found himself not watching his words or mannerisms. He was so comfortable around Ian it was hard to pretend, the facade was gone, even if he didn’t say so, Ian had to know. Only minutes after B0$$B0y secured a date did Ian texted him and ask him to coffee. He’d been waiting for B0$$B0y to set a date for weeks...the only logical explanation for this impromptu coffee date was that  Ian was going to confront him. He was ready. He had a plan. Either Ian would confront him and then realize how much they were meant to be together or Ian just wanted to spend time with him. He hoped for the latter because he wanted to spend time with Ian. He wanted to show him that there was more to him than the money in his wallet and the shark in his eyes.

He was so lost in thought about how the day would proceed he neglected to notice when a certain redhead crossed the street and entered the coffee shop. There was a tap on his shoulder and he turned to see Ian standing with a wide grin on his face. “Gallagher” he licked his lips and his eyes lit up as he took in the younger boys form “What I tell you bout sneakin up on me man?”

Ian laughed before pulling out a seat next to the brunette and sitting down. He scanned the table and saw a cup of coffee and a devil's food cupcake. “This for me?”

Mickey nodded and leaned one elbow on the table before pushing the drink over to Ian. “Yup black coffee, 2 sugars.”

He scoffed and felt a blush creep across his cheeks. He’d never ordered in front of Mickey except at lulus and that wasn’t his regular drink. “How did you know?”

Mickey quirked his brow and shrugged his shoulders, “I have my ways.”

“Uh huh...very cryptic.” he wiggled his fingers “Very dark and mysterious. It’s just a cup of coffee, not a hidden treasure.”

“Whatever Gallagher” Mickey rubbed at his nose then fixed his gaze on Ian, “You order the same shit every time you come here, all I had to do was say that tall redhead with a stick up his ass” he laughed. “The barista knew exxxxactly who I was talkin bout.”

“Fuck you” he pushed Mickey playfully.

“Yeah..you wish.”

Ian rolled his eyes and his lips curled up into a wide smile.

Mickey tilted his head the study the younger boy, “Is that….are you blushin?”

“I’m not...ahem” he turned away shaking his head. He held up his finger, “Anyways. Today’s the big day.” He regained his composure and turned back to his friend. “We’re meeting after this.”

“Oh,” Mickey replied dejectedly. He thumbed at his nose trying to hide his disappointment. His idea of this moment completely deflated by four words. He thought Ian knew or maybe….just maybe, Ian would want him, not B0$$B0y . His online persona had complicated everything. “So that’s still a thing then?”

Ian peeled back the wrapper on his cupcake then took a giant bite. “Mmhm yeah, Mick” He took another bite then pushed the whole thing into his mouth. He was emotional eating don’t judge. With his mouth still full he licked the frosting from his fingers “Wh..” he finished chewing and swallowed “Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Fuck if I know” his good mood was spoiled in a matter of seconds. “Do whatever you fuckin want, just think it’s stupid. Why chase after someone you don’t even know is real?”

Ian rolled his eyes. “He is real Mickey. We’ve been over this. He has to be real or I’ll have wasted the last two almost three years of my life.” He took a sip of his coffee, “I...I don’t know if I could handle that.”

He could see the fear in Ian’s eyes and reached out his hand encompassing the fingers that started to tap nervously on the countertop. “I didn’t mean to freak you out. You know what’s best for you right? You say this guy is the real deal then who cares what I think.” He smoothed his thumb over Ian’s knuckle, “So I was wonderin... You wanna come downtown with me? To the Flea Market?”

He wasn’t phased by Mickey’s touch. He’d learned the man was very hands-on with his affection and to be honest, he found it both calm and comforting. The butterflies in his stomach were from thinking about his date, not the feel of Mickey's skin against his or the way his blue eyes stayed focused lingering on him. No that wasn’t why he was at a loss for words... He would keep telling himself that until he believed it again.

“So?? It’s a date or…”

Ian fell back into the moment and pulled his hand free, “I’m sorry what? I wasn’t, I…”

Mickey licked his lips letting out a small laugh then took a sip of his coffee. “I asked if you wanted to go to the Flea Market with me.”

“The Flea Market? You?” Ian rose a brow in disbelief. “What business would Mickey Milkovich have at the Flea Market?”

He pulled out a 20$ and set it under his empty coffee cup then turned and signaled the barista before standing up from the table. “Come with me and find out.”

“I can’t I have…” Ian looked at his phone. It was already 10:30. “We’re supposed to meet for lunch.”

Mickey laughed and straightened his jacket, “Mkay well most people eat lunch around noon, this guy stood you up how many times? Make him wait. It won’t be all fuckin day just a few hours.”

He sat there staring at his friend then back at his phone. He wanted to go, seeing Mickey so out of his element sounded like a treat in itself but he was also a huge fan of thrift stores and the Flea Market. His sister Debbie had a booth one summer selling jewelry.

“Suit yourself Gallagher” He pulled his phone out and with one click ordered an UBER. “I’m out. Have fun with your date and shit.” He turned and walked out of the cafe. “Fucking damn it!” he kicked at the ground. Whatever. They were meant to be so things would work themselves out. He over thought this day too much. So he had a whole date planned to show Ian the real him, maybe he could see that already, maybe not. He pulled his cigarettes from his pocket and lit one. He had 5 minutes until his ride came. He took a deep drag filling his lungs then leaned back against the wall.

Ian’s fingers trembled. What if he cancels? What if he’s too busy? What if…….what if he forgot? He could see Mickey through the window staring into the distance with a thoughtfulness painted on his face as his lips wrapped around the butt of his cigarette. He really was a mystery. Every time he thought he was getting a grasp on the man, another piece popped up throwing off whatever perception he’d concocted.

C0micB00k_Luv3r: Hey. Something came up and I was wondering if maybe we could do a late lunch….or an early dinner. Say... 4 pm?

Mickey felt his phone vibrate and looked around, there was no car. He pulled his phone from his pocket. 5 minutes had turned to 8 and there was a bright red 1 over his messenger app. He clicked open the message and his heart filled as he read the message.

B0$$B0y_420: That works. How about  6 pm? Same place. xo

Ian smiled when he saw his phone light up. He jumped up from his chair and walked briskly out the door.

He turned when he heard the bell above the cafe door. Ian was walking towards him. “I can get you a car home if you need it.”

“What?” Ian rolled his eyes then snatched the cigarette from Mickey’s lips and took a drag. “Thought we were goin to the Flea Market.”

A black Audi pulled up and honked the horn. He pulled the cigarette from Ian’s finger tossing it on the ground and stepping on it. “Let’s ride.”

Chapter Text

“Oh my god” Mickey smacked his lips, his eyes rolling back as he savored the tangy mixture of diced onions and relish smothered in mustard. “This is fuckin amazin.” He wiped his face with the back of his hand. “Can’t remember the last time I had one of these.”

Ian smirked as he watched Mickey eat his very messy hot dog. There were small piles of green and yellow clumps leaving a trail behind them as they walked. “Didn’t they have hot dogs in New York?”

“Yeah, but if I’m gonna eat street food, it’s gotta be deep fried and covered in powdered sugar.” Mickey laughed. “That, or filled with something creamy and delicious. You know, like a deep fried twinkie or a cheese danish mm” he clicked his tongue, “Can’t beat it.”

Ian took a bite of his Chicago dog, unlike his counterpart he was careful not to lose any of the precious toppings. They walked along the stands looking over trinkets new and old as they ate and Mickey continued to give him a list of all the things you could deep fry. His arteries were clogging just from the conversation but he enjoyed the way Mickey’s eyes lit up as he talked, so instead of changing the topic, he listened watching every raise of his brow and curl of his lips.

“They got Oreos, mm and cookie dough, fuckin bananas..” 

“Bananas?”

Mickey tossed his empty plate into a nearby trash can then looked over at his date. Yeah, this was a date, whether Ian knew it or not. “You never had a deep fried banana?”

“No” 

Mickey’s eyes went wide. “Come on man for real? You haven’t lived till you’ve tried one.” He scanned the stands suddenly craving the creamy treat. Big Nic had a nice setup and he was usually open on Saturdays. His eyes were eagerly combing over the crowd when he spotted the blue and white sign.“Follow me, Gallagher, I’m about to rock your world.” He started to walk turning around occasionally to make sure Ian was following him.

“Mickey you know I don’t do fried foods. I eat healthily.” Ian crossed his arms, “At least I try. That cupcake this mornin, this hot dog” a cheeky grin crossed his lips, “You know, every time we hang out I have to double my time at the gym?”

He stopped in his tracks and turned around before walking up to Ian so they were mere inches apart and studied his face. He had so many freckles. Most were faded but there were a few that stood out like tiny gems. 

“What are you doin?”

Mickey locked eyes with Ian then reached out letting his fingertips rest below the collar of Ian’s shirt and curl along the undone fabric. He gently ran them along the buttoned front and down his chest. He could see the twinkle of confusion in the younger boys eyes and it made him want to lunge forward and attack his pink lips.  “You and your 6 pack can eat a fuckin deep fried banana. Pretty sure you could eat a whole fuckin cake and that shit wouldn’t make a dent.” 

Breathe. BREATHE. The words were repeating in Ian’s mind but for some dumb reason, the command wasn’t connecting to his body. Mickey was standing very close. The smell of his cologne mixed with the slight aroma from the cigarette he smoked earlier mingled in his nostrils. When Mickey’s fingers touched his chest he could swear that the world stopped turning and it was just them in color. Everything else faded to grey, “Y..yeah” he breathed out feeling his body shiver. GET IT TOGETHER. “I mean..” he cleared his throat. “I can try it.”

Mickey stepped back a wave of embarrassment crashing over him. His previously fixed gaze wavered as he questioned his blatant public display. He’d always been straight-forward but maybe that was too much. “Cool,” he said with a playful smile to mask how mortified he was by his actions. Without saying another word he turned and continued to his destination, this time, not checking to see if the redhead was following him. 

He blew it.

 He was going to scare Ian right into the arms of a phantom he created. Way to go.

 The thoughts were racing in his mind, and with every step, they became increasingly more critical.

“Jesus, Mick.” Ian panted trying to keep up with the brunette as he weaved through the crowd of people. It was hot and Mickey was fast. It was like he was trying to keep up with himself. He squinted and saw the back of Mickey’s blue jacket. “Fuck,” he picked up the pace increasing his speed from a fast walk to a jog, when he got closer he reached out and grabbed the mans shoulder spinning him around. “What the hell Milkovich? Why did you run off?”

“I didn’t run off,” he countered before rubbing at his nose with his knuckle. “I’m just faster than you is all.” He looked at Ian and a smile tugged at his lips, “You might be right” he clicked his tongue, “Maybe you should lay off the sweets.”

“Fuck you.” Ian shoved Mickey and the older boy pushed him back.

“You keep sayin that but I’m not feelin the love. Maybe buy my dinner first and we’ll talk.”

“You’re a freak.”

Mickey wiggled his brows, “You have no idea.”

Ian let out an exasperated sigh then pinched the bridge of his nose, “ Remind me how we are friends again..” 

“Mikhailo!” A gruff voice echoed between them and Ian looked up to see a man walking towards them. He had on a white tank top stained with grease and what looked like either blood or strawberry sauce. Based on his size and the slick back of his salt and pepper hair he voted blood.

“Nic!” Mickey walked over to the man who pulled him into a warm embrace. He gave him a few rough pats on the back then pushed off straightening his shirt. “Nice to see you’re still around. My friend Ian here told me he never tried a fried banana and my first thought was Nicolo.” He turned to Ian, “You’re in for a real treat, Gallagher. Nic here has been in the business for 30yrs. Aint that right?”

“Yeah, yeah it’s all true.” Nicolo walked up to him, “You livin under a rock kid?” 

The burly man draped his arm over Ian and started to walk towards a little bodega with a blue and white banner that read, ‘ Dolci’.  

Nicolo smelled like powdered sugar, coffee, and fried dough. He looked over to where Mickey was walking along the other side his fist curled into a ball pressed against his lips at an attempt to stifle his smirk. It was a failed attempt. He opened his hand and aimed a low middle finger at the man who only laughed. Nicolo let him go as the approached the front of the store. He waited for Mickey who only shrugged then walked passed him. He rolled his eyes following the brunette inside. He looked around feeling his mouth start to salivate. The walls were littered with displays of sweet treats of all shapes and sizes. There were macaroons and macarons, devil dogs? Napoleons...and oh so many cookies. Next to the register was a display case with probably 25 different types of cookies. “Holy fuckin shit Mick.” He walked behind Mickey and grabbed his shoulders squeezing as the temptation to devour the entire store plagued him. “I’ve never seen so many desserts all at once.”

“Desserts are my favorite and Nic here makes them like they do in New York.” Mickey wandered over to the register, Ian following close behind him. “Let me get a two-pound box with a little of everythin and two fried bananas.”

“You want Strawberries?”

Mickey laughed lightly, “Come on Nic you know me, that even a real question?”

“Go ahead and grab them. I trust you.” Nicolo rang up his order then grabbed something from the fridge underneath the register. “I made these for Ms. Amanda.” He handed him a small box, “They are raspberry & dark chocolate. You goin to her shop?”

“Yeah, we’re makin our way over there.”

“Give these to her and tell her she is my guinea pig. I’ll be back with your order.” He looked up at Ian, “Nice to meet you, Ian.” 

Ian nodded then watched as the man walked to the back of the bakery and Mickey walked around the counter. He cautiously followed. It was weird being behind the scenes. He’d grabbed a beer or two from behind Kevin's bar back in the day but he didn’t know Nicolo. “So...you gonna tell me how you know this guy?”

Mickey grabbed a large box sticking paper in it then walked over to a scale, “You mean Nic? He’s an old friend. Met him when my sister started workin down here. They were neighbors.”  He grabbed some tongs and slid open the display case door adding a little of everything into his box. “She thought he was weird cause he always tried to talk to her, give her treats, always offered her a ride home..” he popped a butter cookie into his mouth.  “She was only 15 so of course she asked me to start comin with her. I was prepared to give this guy a beat down but when he came over he had fried bananas and his daughter.”

“He has a daughter?” 

“Yup Ariana, she was 13 at the time, always stayed in the back of the shop helpin him decorate so Mandy never saw her.” He placed another layer of paper in the box then walked over to the dessert cooler with the Devil dogs and brownies, “Once Mandy saw her it kind of all clicked into place. Nic was just a Dad. He saw Mandy by herself all day and wanted to give her food and make sure she got home ok. She and Ari are best friends now.”

Ian leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms, “That’s insane. I assume he went from bein that creepy guy to like a Dad to you right?”

Mickey turned to Ian, “You know what they say about assumin, Gallagher?”

“Yeah, I know. Pretty sure we had this conversation before.”

“Then maybe don’t do it so much.” Mickey closed the box, “He’s not like a Dad. He’s just a cool old guy who bakes treats and tells good stories.”

“Ok boys I have these.” Nicolo walked up from the back with two red and white paper baskets lined with food tissues. Inside each was a fried banana cut and topped with cinnamon sugar, whip cream, and a fresh strawberry compote.

“Never stop makin this shit..” Mickey mused before reaching his fingers into the bowl. He pulled out a piece of banana and popped it in his mouth. “Mm...SO  FUCKIN GOOD” he licked his lips then started on another as they walked out of the shop.

Ian looked at the sugary confection. Delicious yes but he was certain it would give him diabetes.

“Go on, Gallagher, try it.” Mickey looked to his date, “Just fuckin grab a piece and eat it. It ain’t poison trust me.”

Ian licked his lips then grabbed a sugary disk and took a small bite. “Mm,” he shoved the rest of the piece into his mouth. The crunchy cinnamon coating mixed with the luscious hot banana and the tangy strawberry danced across his tastebuds….it was making his head spin. “WOW, that’s some good shit.” He laughed and fixed his gaze with Mickey. “You win again Milkovich.”

Mickey drew his bottom lip between his teeth and felt his breath quicken. Ian’s eyes were like green fields, so easy to get lost in. They made him want to throw caution aside and just say ‘ Ian, I love you. Forget about him..’  He stepped forward. “Look, Gallagher..” 

“What is it??”

Nope..He couldn’t do it. Ian would reject him and then there would be no going back. Not for him and not for B0$$B0y. He averted his eyes to break the spell, then took another bite of his food. “When you gonna learn I always win? That’s kind of my thing.” He saw Ian’s smile slip and lost whatever confidence he had moments before.  He kept setting himself up to win only to fail. If only Ian knew how full of shit he was. Why would he say something like that? He tossed his empty plate into the trash and smoothed out his shirt trying to muster up some of the confidence he dropped seconds ago. “Come on, there's more to see.”

Ian gave Mickey a half smile. He was having such a good time then Mickey had to mention being a winner. Was he referencing the shop? Discreetly reminding him of his place, of the fact that he lost. He looked down at what was left of his confection and tossed it in the trash. He’d lost his appetite. What was he doing here? He was playing around in waters he would never be able to navigate when he should be with B0$$B0y. Someone who he knew really cared about him, he wasn’t sure what Mickey cared about. He didn’t understand him and was unsure wanted to.

The change in Ian’s demeanor was drastic. His body was stiff and his eyes looked far away. They only were a few feet apart but it felt like miles. This was his worst fear, Ian would never forgive him. He would never truly see him as Mick, Mickey...just the guy who destroyed his mother's legacy. The big bad Milkovich wolf.  “So this guy you’re seein...what's he like?”

Ian raked his fingers through his hair. Why was Mickey asking about his date? Why did he care so much? He knew the older man didn’t agree with his choices so why pry into it? ”Uh, you know.”

“I don’t know that’s why I’m askin.” Mickey plastered on a fake smile, “You obviously like the guy, he’s important to you so I wanna know about him.”

He shrugged his shoulders, “I don’t know Mick...he’s sweet. He’s smart and likes comics. He has a dog and he’s just ...” Ian felt a smile cross his lips, “He’s kind of perfect minus the work thing.”

“What work thing?”

“He seems to have a busy schedule, I don’t know if I could take him cancelin on me again. There’s busy then there’s...avoidin. Maybe he doesn’t want to meet me.”

“What?” Mickey walked next to Ian and pressed a cigarette between his lips, “Don’t ever think that man, who wouldn’t wanna fuckin meet you.” He lit the smoke and took a drag before handing it off to the redhead. “What’s his name?”

“I don’t know.”

Mickey’s eyes went wide in false surprise, “You don’t know his name? I thought you two been talkin forever.”

“That’s just it, we have but only online. I know his screen name and that’s it.”

“Ok I’ll bite..” he pulled the smoke from Ian’s lips and with two fingers placed it between his own, “What’s his handle.”

Ian laughed and shook his head, “Its...Bossboy..’

“BossBoy? Sounds a little kinky.”

“Shut up.” He pushed Mickey with one hand then glanced around as they passed a shop with jellies and jams. He stopped and grabbed a red jar with green flecks. Raspberry Jalapeno. His favorite.  “You don’t know him,” he said softly as he scanned over the other goods. He could feel Mickey behind him so he looked over his shoulder, “You also didn’t let me finish asshole. His name is BossBoy420 so he’s gotta be fun. He smokes weed.” 

“Or he’s like 420lbs, ever think of that?”

Ian paid for his jam then turned to the older man, “Unlike some people, I’m not shallow. I don’t mind a little extra meat on the bones.”

“A little extra? Guy probably has to be lifted out of his house with a crane.” Ian laughed and unscrewed the lid on the jam he bought. “I’m just sayin. It could also be the number of clown dolls he has in his house, or barbies even. Sick fuck.”

“The number of cars he owns.”

Mickey smirked, “Or the number of cars he’s stolen.”

“Why did I even tell you this?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “The number of cats he owns. The number of times he wakes up to go pee. Oh, I know. It's the number of people he’s slept with. Gross Gallagher. He might be a fuck boy.”

He rolled his eyes, “How about the number of comics he’s read, or maybe the number of conventions he’s been to..”

“I’m gonna stop you there, Gallagher,..not funny.”

He swiped a finger through his jam and sucked it into his mouth, “Mm fuck off man, it doesn’t matter anyway. All I care about is the work thing and the Motorcycle thing. My only concerns. Everythin else is whatever..”

“Uh huh..” He was trying not to watch as Ian ate his jam off his finger but it was mesmerizing. “Wait what do you mean Motorcycle thing?”

“I could never date someone who owned a motorcycle,” Ian said simply. 

Mickey scoffed, “I own a motorcycle.”

“Oh..well It’s a death trap.”

He crossed his arms, “Guess that settles it, we could never be together” he punched the air playfully, “Darn.” He turned to look at some old video games displayed across a table. “I could never be with somebody who likes Fleetwood Mac.” He looked back at Ian, “I took my love, I took it down

Climbed a mountain and I turned around’...what does that even mean? Is she a hiker? If she is why climb mountains just to turn around? What a waste of time, it doesn’t make fuckin sense.”

He was speechless for a moment, something about that song.. He personally loved that song. Fleetwood Mac was one of his mother's favorite bands and that song specifically resonated with him. It was weird that Mickey would choose that example but...Landslide was a very popular song. Everyone knew it so maybe it wasn’t that weird.

He followed Mickey and continued to talk about anything and everything. He listened to him try and defend Motorcycles and that went in one ear and out the other. They talked about the next convention that was coming. It was an Anime Convention and he was thinking about volunteering. Debbie liked Anime so he could bring her along. 

“Hmph?” Mickey looked around but his sister was nowhere to be seen. She had a sign up saying she was on lunch. Stupid. He told her to be here. “Guess you’ll have to meet her another time.”

He furrowed his brow in confusion, “Meet who?”

“Mandy, my sister. She’s the one that does all the artwork in my store. She was sposed to be here but..” he looked down at the box in his hands. “Good news is we get to eat these now.” He opened the box and handed a macaron to Ian then took a bite of his own. “Nic you sweet bastard you did it again.”

“This is delicious.”

“Mmm I know right?” He held up the box filled with cookies. “Let’s go back to your place to divvy these bad boys. Pretty sure Debbie and Carl would love that.”

“I bet they would.”

**

Ian pulled a Tupperware container from the cupboard and walked over to the living room table where Mickey was sitting. “That’s all you Mick, show me what you got.”

Mickey opened the cookie box and went through each cookie telling Ian what flavor and type they were. “This one is a Mexican weddin cookie, don’t get it confused with this one though.” He held up a small cookie ball covered in powdered sugar. They look almost identical to the other except there were small specks of yellow poking through. “This one is a lemon drop, completely different.” 

“Look at you, Mick.” He laughed, “the cookie connoisseur.”

“Yep..that’s me.” Mickey closed the lid on the Tupperware and leaned back on the couch, “So how’s the drawin comin along?”

He grabbed the cookies and leaned back on the couch pulling his legs up beneath him. “It’s goin really well. I actually got an email this mornin about doin a series. I guess they really enjoyed Ella the Elephant.”

“That’s cool, Gallagher. I’m happy for ya.” He pulled out a joint from his pocket and lit it up. “You’re really fuckin good at it, I think you’ll get along aces with my sister.”

“Me too and I been thinkin none of this would have happened if I hadn’t had all this extra time you know? Time for myself. It’s like he says everything happens for a reason.”

Mickey rubbed at his nose and sat up, “He? Like BossBoy?”

“Yeah.”

He scoffed and took another drag of his joint so he didn’t say something stupid.

“I’m supposed to meet him at my old high school, it’s only 15 minutes away from here. I can’t believe he’s been so close this whole time.”

“Crazy” he mumbled. “I mean who knows you could have been seein him every day.”

“That’s too much to even think about.”

“It’s true though. You could have talked with him already and not even fuckin known it.”

“I..I guess. Maybe.”

“This guys a real piece of work.” He sat up resting his elbows on his knees, “He’s got you all ready to jump into his arms. Got you thinkin he’s the only person you could ever fuckin love.” The weed and the conversation were a bad mix and he could feel his mask slipping away. He turned locking eyes with Ian’s. “I can’t help but wonder if I hadn’t been Milkovich Graphics & Gifts and you Comics & Characters ….”

Ian drew in a staggered breath “I know..” he whispered.

“If we met different just as you and me. I would have asked you out for beer and a burger and you’d have ordered a fuckin salad.”

Ian laughed, “I probably would have.”

“Yeah, then the only thing we’d have to argue about would be DC vs Marvel...Batman vs Superman. We would go to all the fuckin conventions and spend our lives together….”

He blinked away a stray tear, why was this happening? How could Mickey’s words be prodding at his heart so deep they cut. “Who would fight about that?”

“We wouldn’t.” 

“No..it’d be silly.”

He reached for Ian’s hand, “Because we know they are both badasses. Like us.”

“Mickey I..” Ian pulled his hand back and looked away. This was wrong. He couldn’t do this. 

“If only..” he stood up from the couch and grabbed his cookies. “I should go.”

“Yeah...you should. I have…” he turned to Mickey, “I have to get ready.”

“For sure man.” Mickey walked out the door and turned around, “I hope he’s everythin you want him to be.”

Ian stood up and wiped at his eyes then walked over to the door, “He will be Mick” he said softly before shutting it. 

He pulled out his phone and saw it was already 5:15 pm. He was going to be late if he didn’t get dressed and leave now. He felt sick to his stomach but he made his choice. He needed to follow his head, his heart would only get him into trouble. His heart wanted this too right? He was sure of it. If it didn't before it was clear now...he wanted B0ssB0y.

Chapter Text

The crickets chirped in time with his heartbeat, it had been over 20 minutes and there was no sign of Boss Boy, he should have never come. He let out a deep sigh and leaned against the cold steel beam of the bleachers staring up at the fading night. He should have worn a sweater or hoodie but he wanted to look his best for his date so instead, he wore a simple light green t-shirt and dark blue jeans. The wind bit at his face and his fingers were starting to go numb. It was nice earlier then out of nowhere the storm clouds rolled in. Go figure. The sky was ominous with scattered shades of grey and blue swirling together like the gut-wrenching feeling of uncertainty bubbling inside him.

He knew this was too good to be true. He turned down Mickey so he could stand in a baseball field in the dark, cold and alone.

What an idiot.

As he walked towards the exit a warm tear escaped his eye and creeped down his cheek before his hand brushed it away. There was no time for that. He’d already wasted too much on this guy, he wasn’t about to cry over him.

This was it, he was done.

He thought Boss Boy was the real deal. The way he made time stop when they talked, more so how long it lingered when they didn’t. He wanted this with his whole being to be something. It didn’t have to be everything...just a block for him to build on. Was that too much to ask? It must be because now he was left with nothing once again, at least before when he lost everything he had BossBoy. What did he have now? Where did he go from here?

He turned and walked down the row of bleachers to the exit then bent down and stepped out into the bitter night. He trudged through the green field lost in his thoughts wondering what he said or did wrong. How could he have misjudged the situation this much that not once, not twice but three times he was left with the only person he could ever count on, himself? Heat pooled in his eyes, then he lost the battle and tears began to fall. “Fucking crybaby, Jesus.” He stopped to wipe at his face when he heard the faint jingle of a bell echoing in the distance and the sound of running feet.

This was it. He was fucking here! He went to wipe the tears from his face but before he could put his hands down he was knocked to the ground by 40lbs of grey and black fur. He put his hands up to protect his face but instead he was met with loving licks and a cold,wet nose prodding at him.

“Damn it Baxter get off of him.” There was a clap of hands and like magic, the dog left him to stand up.

He had to have hit his head hard because that voice was eerily familiar. He stood up and brushed off his pants before looking up and into the stormy blue eyes of Mickey Milkovich.

Wait...

No. How was this? What was he doing here? No... no just no. This was not happening!

“N..no Mickey?” His voice was broken as the man's name escaped his lips. “M..mickey why are you.. What? I don’t...” his eyes darted around frantic scanning the man and they landed on his dog now sitting at his feet. “Baxter?” Baxter! “No Mickey..Bo..this can’t be...you can’t..” The tears that he’d wiped away now crept back and a small stream slid down his face. This WASN’T happening. It couldn’t be.

Mickey studied the younger boys face and every fear he’d predicted at this moment was coming true. Fear, hate, betrayal...pain, hurt, disappointment. They were all there each one just as visible as the last. Ian’s heart had been ripped from his chest in a matter of seconds and could feel it still warm and beating in his hand. He took a step forward, “Ian I can explain...”

He immediately stepped back. “D..don’t touch me. You can’t.” He shook his head, “You’re not..Why are you here?”

Mickey gave him a warm smile then wrapped his arms around him. He tried to break free but those arms were familiar and warm. He liked the smell of his cologne and he could feel his heart racing like a hummingbird. “Why are you here?” he repeated softly though he already knew the answer. He needed to be sure.

Ian was like a piece of broken china in his arms. If he let go he could break but if he held him tight enough he might be able to glue the pieces back together. “I’m here for you.”  

Mickey pulled back and stared at him, his eyes were wet and sincerity and fear lingered behind them. Mickey slid his finger down his face and when he tried to look away he held his chin forcing him to confront those thunderstorms he called eyes once more.

There was a clap of thunder then he felt the raindrops bouncing off his skin. Breathe Milkovich, just a little rain. Just do it. “It’s ok ComicBookLover,” he said softly smoothing his thumb over Ian’s jaw. “It’ll be ok. I love you.”

Ian’s eyes went wide and he felt his body explode with emotions. What was hiding under the surface came pouring out and he lunged forward “I wanted it to be you,” he whispered then closed the distance between them. When their lips collided everything came to a stop. Mickey tasted sweet like honey and spearmint gum and his lips were like two soft pillows as they moved in tandem with his own. His arms were strong as they held him and gentle fingers combed through his hair setting his body on fire.  “Mickey” he sighed his hand moving down to Mickey’s waist, pulling him closer as he fell into a feeling he didn’t know could exist “I lov…”

No. He couldn’t say that. Mickey couldn’t say that...not after..

He pushed away from Mickey violently and hugged his arms across his chest.

Mickey caught his balance and started back over to Ian, “Aye what’s wrong? You ok?”

No! No he was not fucking ok. He wasn’t. He felt fucking violated. He stormed over to Mickey and wound back his fist.

“Holy fuck Gallagher, what the fuck?” Mickey held his nose and he could see a small trickle of blood.

“You lied to me” he cried feeling the anger dissapate. There was nothing to hide behind and all that was left was pain, hurt, and humility...“Y..You used me Mickey, you played games with me.”

“No Ian it’s not..”

“How long?”

“Calm down.”

He pushed Mickey hard, “How FUCKING long?” He wiped at his eyes as the salty tears ran free. “How long have you known it was me and don’t you fuckin lie to me either B0ssB0y.”

Mickey looked up at Ian the best he could still holding his nose, he blew it. “Christmas Eve, we were supposed to meet and I saw you with the rose.”

He laughed weakly and his face broke into a feeble smile. He was so foolish. “Un-fucking-believable. I can’t.. I just,” he threw his hands up in surrender. He was done with this conversation. He locked eyes with Mickey, “I never want to see or speak to you again Mickey or B0ssB0Y, whatever you call yourself.” His voice cracked and he averted his eyes hearing the finality of his decision. “You broke..you broke my heart.” He turned and ran one foot in front of the other. Don't look back, don't stop. He ran as fast as he could, not knowing where to go. His world was crashing down around him again but this time his heart took the damage. It was broken into a million tiny pieces. He didn’t know what was real. Why would Mickey lead him on like this? Was this all a game? He was B0ssB0y and B0ssBoy was Mickey it was making his brain spin and he needed it to quiet. There was only one thing he could think of to numb the pain. Alcohol and lots of it.

Chapter Text

Some people emotional eat. They think maybe a donut will ease the pain so they eat one, then two, pretty soon they go back for the whole box giving them a short lived sense of accomplishment. Then, instead of feeling satisfied, they feel even more like a worthless piece of shit then when they started. He didn’t binge on donuts. No he buried his wounds in something far less sweet but just as indulgent. 

Vodka.

McCormicks to be exact. The stuff that had the good burn. Some people say boo to cheap vodka and to those people he would say fuck you. His vodka might not be top shelf  be but there was plenty of it, enough to drown the pain shot after shot and in the end that’s what mattered.

His phone kept going off. The screen was currently lighting up, the buzzing sound filling the room like a pesky fly that wouldn’t go away. It had been two weeks since his encounter with Mickey. Two weeks since he felt the affliction of a broken heart, something he’d only experienced this once. He stopped caring about anything outside the 4 walls of his apartment. He was ignoring everyone and when he wasn’t taking shots of vodka he was sleeping. Lonely days turned into cold nights where he would toss and turn, lost in wayward thoughts of inadequacy where he would question the meaning of his existence. He couldn’t remember the last time he took a shower or when he ate something other than the pop tarts, if he ate those at all. Eating wasn’t on his agenda, neither was drinking unless it burned his throat going down and even then he was finding the copious amounts of alcohol might be able to drown out his thoughts but they did nothing for the emptiness growing inside him.

The one thing he was consistently doing even though it seemed pointless, was taking his meds. It was too hard to find the right dose and he didn’t want to face the 3 D’s of med adjustments; drowsiness, dizziness, and dinginess. He didn’t understand why he was taking them though. They didn’t keep him from sleeping 16 hours a day, they didn’t force him to pick up his phone or answer his door, and they certainly didn’t shut down the voices in his head whispering about what a failure he was. He probably lost his job but that wasn’t a concern to him. His soul felt vacant and no amount of money or comic books could fill the void.

He wasn’t stupid, he knew the signs. It would be nice to think he was depressed because he was hurt, because his heart was shattered. That was a big part of it but the honest truth was he was in a low and he didn’t want to get out of it. What was the point? Why try to face a new day when the future held nothing special? B0ss B0y was supposed to be his future. They were going to conquer the world together, maybe even have a family. He’d thought about it when he was younger, he loved being a big brother and he would make a good dad. With Craig the thoughts became suppressed but they still lingered. How was he supposed to be a Dad and teach a small mind the novelties of life when one bad day could put him down for weeks or worse lift him up to the point where he could eat bad decisions for breakfast followed by no sleep for lunch and dinner? At least with a partner, someone who cared about him, understood him, he could come out on the other side semi-stable. Feeling human. The thought of this being his life and facing it alone was enough to keep him  in his bedroom curled up under the covers in a warm cocoon of despair and anxiety. The what-ifs plagued his mind leaving him paralyzed to do anything but think and cry. It was a vicious cycle of misery, pain and self-loathing.

Today was like yesterday and the day before, and the day before that. He woke up to a dark room, his shades had been drawn to leave him in complete darkness. He was to the point the depression was relatively comforting because throughout everything in his life, it was one of the few things he could always count on. People were wrapped in balls of mystery and deceit but his emotions were constant.They never pretended to be something they are not.

He had bad days where he through on a fake smile but he still felt like he was dying inside. Then there were the days when he sat in a room filled with people, looking emotionless and void that he could be feeling brief moments of happiness. He could still catch a glimpse or two of serenity, or contentment and he used that to keep going but sometimes it just didn’t seem worth it. He would never be normal, never be able to think, feel and act the way others believed he should. When he was leveled out he didn’t feel like himself but for the most part he felt ok, the thing is it never lasted. Nothing did.

B0$$B0y420 was Mickey Milkovich. His heart twinged with a sharp pain when he thought about his betrayal. He couldn’t conceive why Mickey let the charade go on so long. The man enjoyed his power, he thrived when he had the upper hand but he thought there was more to him then the shark he appeared to be. 

Over the last year he’d grown to see a side of Mickey that was making him question his values, his moral compass was off kilter. There were nights clouded with dreams of skin touching skin where he would wake up with his chest drenched in sweat and his cheeks rose red. He had wondered if he was falling in love with someone who stood for everything he was against, the tyrant who destroyed his livelihood and his mother's legacy? How could any sane person see past those things?

 He did.

 He began to see an entrepreneur, a smart businessman who liked nice things but liked to treat others. A kind soul whose roots were buried deep in the dirt from the back of the yards and who walked the same streets as he did. Mickey worked his whole life to earn the reputation of ] that followed his name. He was beginning to believe the man wasn’t vindictive snake, he just won the coin toss. It’s not personal, it's business. Where Mickey ended and Boss Boy began was blurring in his mind. When it was revealed that his confidant for the last two years was the same man he was trying so desperately not to fall for, it made his heart swell with a warm happiness that was short lived. Once the inflated feeling traveled from his heart to his brain it deflated into a shriveled mess because Mickey knew the truth. He knew that he was Comic Book Luver. Not the whole time but when he found out he kept it a secret like a coward. If he would have told him then maybe he wouldn’t have wasted his time. Instead, he fell in love with both the man and the screen name leaving his heart to be trampled on and torn to pieces. How could he be so oblivious? All the signs were there but he was blinded. How could he be so stupid? Mickey’s mannerisms, the things he said, the things he knew, the truth was sitting in front of him this whole time and he refused to see it. He chose to ignore the little signs, that itchy feeling that had a small voice in his head asking..could it be you? What did you just say? How did you know that? These were the thoughts that circled in his brain. He chose to dismiss them because it was impossible. It couldn't be.

He couldn’t sleep anymore. He turned onto his back and stared little bumps on his ceiling. His body was stiff from to much sleep and his stomach rumbled from the lack of food. He drew in a deep breath and grimaced when the smell of dirty dishes, vodka, and his own self wafted up to his nose. He was in serious need of a shower and maybe a new set of sheets. 

He groaned as he sat up and faced his reality. He let one foot slip off the bed then another onto the cool wooden floor. He looked over to the nightstand where his phone was resting, the flashing light of missed calls and messages signaling him like a beacon. Yeah... Not yet. That was a step for another day, right now he needed to focus on basic maintenance and maybe try to eat something. His hole was deep, dark and already the nagging thoughts started telling him to lie back down. He needed to try but it would be a slow climb out of it.

**

He checked his phone again. Nothing. He shouldn’t be surprised. He texted Ian every day for two weeks. He called and left voicemails but not a peep, he’d been ghosted. 

He understood why Ian was hurt but he didn’t get a  chance to explain himself. Ian saw this as some villainous game to toy with his emotions when that couldn’t be further from the truth. When he turned around and walked back to Lulus that night it wasn’t so he could fuck with Ian Gallagher and get in the last laugh, no it was because C0micB00kLuv3r was his soul mate. He could feel it in his bones. The man brightened his dark days and put a smile on his face when he forgot how to do it himself. He  couldn’t imagine not having him in his life.

Ian didn’t do anything to him except stand in his way, he was stubborn and determined. What he did wasn’t personal, it was business. How was he supposed to tell Ian he knew. He was expected to explain how before the takeover, the drama and tears they there were just two men who met online. Was he supposed to tell him that every day for the last year, the thing he looked forward to more than the money and fancy restaurants, were the text messages about ladybugs and sunsets? Should he have told him even though you don’t like this side of me I know your in love with the real me, the side I save for the people that matter? Was he supposed to expose himself and lay it all out on the table? 

No fuckin way.

Ian would have shot him down in a heartbeat. He didn’t know the real him back then and the guy didn’t want to. Even now, he was still kept at arms distance though it seemed with each day that distance became shorter. That was all in the past. Now it spanned across space and time. Ian Gallagher would become the one that got away and he would grow up telling the woeful fairy tale of two star crossed lovers to grandchildren. 

He’d been fighting the urge to go see Ian. The constant feeling pulled at him in the night when his mind would settle from the day and he would picture Ian huddled alone on the couch or in his bed. The worst was when he pictured them together; playing guitar hero, eating cookies or watching movies. He would reminisce on the gentle touches and flirty glances that made his heart jump, and the goofy smile became a permanent part of his wardrobe whenever he was around the redhead. Those moments that were lost forever. 

What would he say? Where would he start? He couldn’t bare the thought of Ian not being in his life.The  boy wasn’t talking to him and he told him pretty clearly to fuck off but his number was still in his phone and his pain was still in his heart. Ian was very much with him even if they hadn’t talked in two weeks. If he saw the boy and the truth came out then Ian could tell him he never felt the same, it was all a mistake and to go their separate ways. 

That….he couldn’t handle that.

“Did you hear a damn thing I said boy?” Terry slapped the desk making him jump from his seat.

“Fuckin what? Say it again!” He folded his arms and leaned back in his desk chair. He hated these meetings. Terry and Charlie would sit there pretending to play nice when he knew the truth. They despised him and only followed his rule because of the money.

“Whew boy,” Charlie licked his lips and glanced at Terry giving him a look of disapproval. “You’re Daddy ever talked to me like that I’d tan his hide.”

He clenched his jaw and glanced at his phone, hoping in the ten seconds that passed he would see a text message but again there was nothing. He looked back to his Grandfather, “Good thing we’re all fuckin adults here then aint it? I’ll talk how I wanna talk and if you got a fuckin problem there’s the door.” He rubbed at his temples and scanned the room until his eyes landed on the clock. The client would be here in 10 minutes. There was a new product being released by a company he worked with. He might hate meetings because it meant being in the same room with two homophobic pricks but he enjoyed his work. It made every day exciting even when his mood was sour and his mind was consistently drifting to the unanswered calls and messages that he carried with him in a tiny box in his pocket. He needed a good distraction.

 The company he was meeting with sold magic classes.

Yeah...that was a thing.

His logic was if people are interested in superheroes and Dungeons and Dragons then why wouldn’t they be interested in magic. Make Your Magic not only had a full collection of do it yourself magic and how-tos, but they offered hands-on classes that could be taught on location. They wanted to do a magic show for the public to advertise the classes and release their products. 

Charlie tapped his pencil against the table then sighed, 

“Kid I don’t understand why you are waistin your money on this magic shit. No one is goin to pay to learn somethin they could see on the RedTube. They can learn it for free.”

“Dad,” Terry chuckled and patted his Grandfather's leg. “It’s YouTube. Red Tube is a porn site.”

“Ha! So it is. Even better.” Charlie wiggled his brows then turned to him. “You should check out some of that porn Mikhailo, maybe it’ll get you off that aids track.”

“I’ve been tryin to get him right for years Dad, no amount of pussy will do it. He just wants to suck dick and fuck fairies, fuckin disgustin.”

“Holy fuck.” He tossed his head back and closed his eyes trying to drown out the all too familiar conversation. “Can we not, we have people comin up here any fuckin minute.” He lifted his head and looked at his family with a stern face, “You can’t say that shit when they’re here. It’s fuckin ignorant for one and offensive. People aren’t a bunch of homophobic assholes like in your day Charlie.” He narrowed his eyes on his father, “Please control him. I can’t have some stupid bullshit spoutin off that could ruin this.”

 Charlie eyeballed Terry. “Just tryin to save the kids soul son. A little porn could fix him right up. I mean it. I saw plenty of faggots drop dead from that HIV.” His Grandfather locked eyes with him and gave a shrug of his shoulders, “You ask me, that’s what you get for bein an abomination, that and an eternity in hell.” 

“Jesus fuckin Christ I can’t listen to this anymore!” He jumped up from his chair just as the door opened. “Get out, both of you. I’m done.”

Terry looked at his grandfather then back at him, “Think about what you’re doin boy. You can’t kick out blood. You’d be nothin without us.”

“HA!” He laughed dryly then rubbed at his nose, “That’s fuckin funny. Hi-larious actually.” He walked around the table to where the pair was sitting and leaned down. “I made this fuckin company from nothin. I built it with my money, my fuckin time and MY effort,” He lowered his voice to a whisper, “Now get your homophobic asses out of my office. You’re fired.” He stood up straight, “Terry you’re a terrible fuckin person, I spent so much time tryin to get your approval I forgot to recognize that. I don’t need or want anythin from you, go infect someone else.” He looked over at Charlie, “And you..you’re worse then him which I didn’t think was humanly possible. You may be a wiz with money Charlie but your a shit human bein, I’m glad when I came back I finally got to meet the man who made this,” he gestured to his Dad in disgust, “And now it’s been my much awaited fuckin pleasure to tell you yes I’m a fuckin faggot. I suck dick and I’m currently in love with someone who I want to bend me over this fuckin table.” He wrapped his knuckles against the wood earning wide eyes from his family, “Yeah you heard it right. This fairy takes it up the ass and guess what?” He leaned back down touching the back of both chairs, “I fuckin love it. Now get out and leave me to my faggy ways and my multi million dollar company.” He pushed their chairs hard then stepped back pointing to the door.

Charlie stood there glaring at him. “You’ll burn for this Mikhailo. God sees everything and you will burn.”

Terry grabbed his grandfather and headed to the door. He looked over his shoulder as they walked past the client. “You’re no Milkovich. As far as I’m concerned I have two sons. You’re dead to me.”

“Fine! GET OUT!” He watched as his family walked out the door and even though his words were harsh and confident...his heart hurt. He rubbed at his nose then the room filled with the sound of applause. He looked around to see the Make Your Magic team clapping with wide smiles on their faces. His lips turned up and he let out a small laugh. “Thanks. I didn’t want you to see that shit. My apologies” He smoothed out the non-existent wrinkles in his suit jacket then walked around to his chair, “Thank you. Please take a seat.”

*

How did they make Lucky Charms taste so magically delicious? It could be his lack of food over the last two weeks but after one bowl he needed a second then a third. He watched Ink Master on Spike TV and laid on his couch. He was starting to feel more human. The shower helped. It was refreshing and felt like he was washing away more than just dirt. It was like he was shedding his skin and preparing to re-enter the world very...very slowly.

 His most daunting task was still lingering but he was finding it harder and harder to ignore. Everytime he would walk by his room he saw his phone on the charger. The facebook notifications, the missed calls and texts, the emails from work. The responsibilty. It was enough to make him curl back up into a ball and wish it all away. Too bad it didn’t work like that. 

Some people say depression is just a state of mind but it’s far more than that. No one wants to sleep all day and listen to their mind criticize and crucify their very existence. He came out of a low and thought nope not ready lets do it again. It was like a blanket that wrapped you up tight until it suffocates you and you fall into it’s mercy. You can fight back and sometimes you can push past it but when it feels like you can’t move, can’t breathe, cant ...anything. That’s not a state of mind, it’s a state of being. When he woke up this morning the blanket seemed easier to move in and as the day progressed he could feel the life slipping back into his body enough to start trying to push it off.

That being said the phone could wait another day. He had explaining to do for just falling off the grid and that meant acknowledging what happened and he just...he wasn’t ready. He wanted one more day to find his big boy pants and his paint brushes so he could wear his mask and try to move on.

*

He couldn't wait anymore. He wanted to see Ian. The pull was too strong. After that meeting, he felt adrenaline, a confidence he hadn’t felt in a long time. He said it before and he’ll fuckin say it again.

Ian was his soul mate.

He got into his car and drove the 20 minutes to Ian’s apartments. He parked and walked over to the front door and pushed the buzzer.

“Noo ugggh” Ian groaned as he crunched down a spoonful of cereal. The sound was deafening as it echoed through his apartment.

 Not. Gonna. Happen.

 Today was for sweatpants and takeout. It’s was his pregame. He wasn’t ready for whoever was on the other end of the buzzer so he decided to ignore it.

“Fuck,” Mickey kicked at the door then turned and leaned against the wall. He didn’t really think this through. What was he supposed to do now, stand around like a creeper and wait for someone to not pay attention and let him sneak in behind them? 

He could do that.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it up and taking a deep drag. Who knew how long he would be fucking standing here. He planted the smoke between his lips and pulled out his phone to check the time. It was 6:30pm. Ian had to be home, the guy owned a bike and took the train everywhere. Nothing in his schedule would make him home later than 5pm. He pulled his cigarette from his mouth and ashed it before returning to the buzzer panel. He pushed on Ian’s number relentlessly but still nothing. “Ugh Damn it!.”

“Um excuse me?” A small voice came from behind him and he turned to see a girl maybe 11 or 12. “Mr you can’t smoke here see.” She pointed to the sign against the building. 

He rolled his eyes and dropped his smoke snuffing it out with the toe of his shoe against the pavement. “Sorry, locked myself out and I’m waitin for my friend to come let me in.”

“Oh,” the girl smiled and pushed passed him entering a code into the door. It clicked and she held it open. “Here you go. I hope you find your friend and remember you can't smoke it’s against the rules and it’s icky and stuff ok?”

He laughed, “Ok, thank you.” He walked down the hall to the elevator. Once he stepped inside there was no going back, no pussying out. It's now or never.

 The metal doors opened and he walked through them trying to remember the sense of confidence he had earlier at the office. If he could tell Terry and Charlie how he really felt he damn sure could tell Ian. 

The elevator dinged and he took a deep breath before stepping out. “You got this Milkovich, be honest. Show him he loves you too. He has to love you.” He walked around the corner and to the end of the hall. When he reached Ian’s door he could hear the sounds of TV laughter and loud voices. He rapped his knuckles on the door.

Ian froze. Who the hell was at his door? It wasn’t his family because they would make way more noise, Fiona would be talking into the door and Lip would be chastising him to open it up. He sat there closing in on himself and stared down the door until it was all he could see. He didn’t want to open it, he didn’t want to acknowledge whatever real life problem was behind it.

“Gallagher I know you’re in there, I need to talk to you.” Mickey knocked again. “I aint leavin.”

“Go away!” No way was he talking to Mickey. He never wanted to see the brunette snake again. He told him this, so why was he here. What could he possibly have to say to him that would change what he did. There was no justifying his actions so why would he let him try? “I don’t want to talk to you, Mickey. We’re done ok just...” he pulled his legs to his chest. “Leave.”

Ian voice sounded frail, like he hadn’t talked for days. It was soft and fragile making his heart ache all over again like it did that day on the baseball field. “Ian please, 5 minutes. That’s all I’m askin.” Ian said nothing but now that he knew he was home he wasn’t going anywhere without saying his piece. “Damn it Gallagher,” he knocked again, “Just open the door. Let me say what I gotta say and I’ll fuck off. I promise you’ll never hear from me again, if that’s what you want.”

His feet were moving before his heart had the chance to tell them no. He turned the lock on his door and pulled it open to reveal Mickey standing there with a furrowed brow and a worried look in his eyes. “That is what I want.” He crossed his arms and stared down the man in front of him. “You got 5 minutes.”

Mickey scratched at his neck, “Can I come inside at least? You’re neighbors don’t need to know our fuckin buisness.”

Ian breathed in deep clenching his jaw then stepped to the side. When Mickey stepped in he shut the door and leaned against it. “3 minutes.”

“But you just said 5 minutes 10 seconds ago.”

“2 minutes.”

“Holy fuck ok.” Mickey walked over to the couch and sat down. “Can you at least sit down?”

Ian rolled his eyes and walked over to the couch sitting down next to Mickey, he made sure to sit as close to the edge as possible.

Mickey could feel the distance between them and it was bigger than the one person gap on the small couch. He pulled his smokes from his pocket and lit one up before turning to Ian, “Want one?”

“Talk or leave,” Ian said bluntly. He was not in the mood for a serious talk with the man who broke his heart, let alone chit chat.

“Okay, okay.” He took a drag and glanced away. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I was a coward alright. I didn’t think you’d be able to see past all the shit that happened.” He looked over at Ian, “That’s it. It was nothin malicious, I wasn’t tryin to scheme or pull a fast one I just..”

“You what Mick huh? You what? There’s no excuse for what you did, how can I ever trust you? How do I know what was real?”

“It was all real damnit.” He snuffed out his cigarette and turned to face Ian, “All of it. That was me. I am B0ssB0y and I am Mickey Milkovich. The only difference is you didn’t know that someone who can talk for hours about comics and food and mindless bullshit could also be a ruthless, take no shit businessman. That never occurred to you did it?”

“No it didn’t.” He stood up from the couch and crossed his arms. “Why didn’t you tell me? That night at Lulu’s instead of making me feel like you didn’t want me why didn’t you tell me Mickey.” He laughed lightly and ran his hand through his hair, “You lied to me. You sat there and lied to my face.”

“I saw you in the window that night and I turned around to leave. I was going to stand you up and never talk to you again.”

He knew he shouldn’t but he couldn’t stop himself. He walked over and sat on the couch fixing his gaze with sapphire blue eyes, “Then why didn’t you?”

“Because I was in love with C0micB00kLuv3r.” He grabbed Ian’s hand. “The thought of not seein those stupid messages about the weather and squirrels ..you made me see things differently. Then I thought back to that day in the bookstore when I watched you read Garfield and I knew it..”

Ian swallowed thickly, “Knew what?”

“That I loved you Ian, not your screen name so I turned around and went to meet you but you didn’t want to see me. The look on your face when I walked up to your table” Mickey let go of Ian’s hand and scoffed, “It was like I was a monster, a disgustin villain or somethin so I decided to play the part, be an asshole. 

“You thought that would make me like you?”

“I didn’t care if you liked me, the minute you saw me every sweet part of you left and all that we were left with was enemies. I knew if I told you it would ruin everything.”

Ian turned away in disbelief, “You ruined everything anyways.”

“No, I love you.” He reached out to touch Ian’s shoulder but the man cringed at his touch. “I wanted you to fall in love with me, that’s why I did it. Even if I was an asshole I still liked you. I thought if I backed off online and showed the real me in person you would fall for me instead. I wanted to tell you Ian.”

Ian raised his eyes to meet with Mickey’s. “You could have told me. I wouldn’t..I..”

“What? You tellin me you wouldn’t have hated me even more if I told you before you got to know me? Don’t kid yourself Gallagher.” He scooted closer to the redhead, “I couldn’t risk loosin you, not online or in person. I love you, You’re under my skin man,” he grabbed Ian’s face, “The fuck can I do?”

He pulled his face free from Mickey and stared at the ground. He didn’t know what to feel or what to say. He wanted to curl back into his bed and close his eyes. Erase this last year and start over. 

He felt his eyes prickle and decided that it was time to go. He did his part, he laid it out on the line for Ian and that was all he could do. He stood up and walked towards the door, “Told you this before Ian, I can’t change the past. All I can do is try and make it up to you now.” Ian sat there head down still avoiding him, it was like he was completely shut off. “Fine. Done is done then. Said what I had to say.” 

Ian sat there watching as Mickey walked towards the door. If he let him leave then that was it. Goodbye BossBoy, goodbye Mickey Milkovich. No more late nights filled with the man’s laugh and popcorn being thrown at each other, no more long days brightened by a simple text on his phone about pizza toppings. Mickey poured his heart out to him and for the first time since that night two weeks ago he felt like that empty hole inside him wasn’t so deep. When Mickey walked in his apartment to begin with, it hurt his heart because a part of him knew he loved him. He was done fighting that part. It might take a while for him to trust the man like he did before but if he could do it after everything that happened with his bookstore, he could do it with the belief that Mickey was his soulmate. His mother used to tell him that the best things in life usually come with the highest price and that didn’t mean money. It meant sometimes you have to leave yourself vulnerable and trust your instincts to discover true happiness. 

Mickey went to reach for the door handle when he felt a hand on his shoulder and he was being spun around to face Ian. 

He studied Mickey’s face then closed the distance between them pressing their lips together in a hungry yet passionate kiss. “Never lie to me again,” he sighed then pushed Mickey up against the door roughly. 

“Never.” Mickey wrapped his arms around Ian taking in the warmth of his body pressed against him. He lifted his hand to cup the side of Ian’s face as there lips moved with one another.

Ian pulled back and grabbed Mickey’s hand firmly before turning around pulling him back to his room. It wasn’t until he entered that he immediately regretted it. His room was trashed. You could tell he’d been living in it for quite some time. “Sorry..I didn’t know you were..I wasn’t expectin..”

Mickey pulled Ian back towards him and pressed his fingers against his lips “Shut..up.” His eyes scoured the room then landed back on Ian. “Don’t apologize for shit.” He climbed onto the bed with Ian and lay down next to him. “So this is it. You know everythin Comic Book Lover.”

Ian took a deep breath then reached out pulling Mickey close, “Yeah, and so do you.” He laughed lightly and ran his fingers through Mickey’s hair, “You really want to get involved with this hot mess BossBoy?” He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling, “My life is a rollercoaster.”

Mickey turned on his side and rested his head in his hand as he studied the man next to him, “I’m ready to ride Gallagher.” He reached out and grabbed Ian’s hand, “That means for better or worse, sickness and health and all that other shit.”

He turned his head to meet Mickey’s, “You’re a fuckin dork.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss against his lips, “And...I think I love you.” 

Mickey pulled back and raised his brow, “You think?”

“Shut up.” Ian grabbed Mickey pulling him close again and rested his forehead against Mickey’s, “I love you.”

“Good.” Mickey closed the distance between them.

 This was it. That moment in life's puzzle where you that missing piece that connects everything together. Money, notariety, fear...it meant nothing when compared to love.