Basically Josh is in denial about a lot of stuff
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Summary
He hasn't always loved her, but he almost wishes he had. Because maybe if these feelings had always been buried in his heart he would know how to deal with them, but they weren't and he doesn't. As Josh stares up at his ceiling, with heartache pounding in his chest, he involuntarily finds himself rethinking his history with her. Trying to pinpoint when he fell in love with her.
One-Shot. Joshaya. Josh-Centric.