Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It rained the day after the Idol Awards. Storm clouds bellowing over the city lights, leaving wet streaks across Seoul like smears of paint on canvas.

Their first day of hiatus. A 3 month break.

Zoey had suggested they go stock up on snacks and pile onto their couch, settling into the lull of movie marathons, take out, and spending time together on their hobbies. They tracked droplets into the entryway of their penthouse, shaking off coats and dropping wet plastic bags on the rug.

Mira only wanted to help, to offer a gentle gesture of affection. Something to ease the tension between them.

She gently grabbed the shoulders of Rumi's coat, attempting to shed it and hang it up for her.

Mira felt her heart shatter when Rumi recoiled away gasping, clinging to her coat. Her chest heaved and pushed out shallow breathes. Mira drew back her own hands as if she had burned Rumi by touching her. Zoey came slowly to Rumi's side.

"Hey hey Rums.. it's okay. You're safe." Their maknae soothed.

"S-sorry I just..sorry." Rumi mumbled, arms tight to her chest.

Mira wordlessly stepped away, an unpleasant sting working it's way into her eyes. She turned, taking all the bags to the kitchen. Her long pink hair formed a curtain to hide her face, tucked underneath her ball cap. Mira unpacked their goods, hands shaking ever so faintly. She could hear Zoey comforting Rumi still, coaxing her to hang up her own coat.

"We.. didn't see what happened on stage." Zoey picked at her fingernails. "Do you..want to talk about it?"

"No..no." Rumi whispered. "Not right now Zo."

Mira's pulse crawled into her throat and radiated down through her sternum uncomfortably. She gripped the counter-top tight, knuckles turning white. There is was again, that burning roar deep in her that she hated. The deep, aching burning in her eyes was her only warning of angry tears to come. She walked off to her room, alone.

"Mir?" The small, dark haired girl called after her. "Where are you going?"

"My room. Don't wait up just-" she swallowed down the break in her voice. "Just enjoy yourselves yeah?"

Mira tucked inside her door before Zoey could pursue her, leaning back against the door and releasing a shuddering breath. Now in the familiar, lonely quiet of her own space. She shed her wet clothes, hanging her hat and cleaning her glasses off. She collapsed into bed in a soft, oversized shirt and her panties.

"I'm sorry." She hissed into her pillow, to nobody who could hear her.

The cold rain had settled into her bones, so she nestled into her blanket. A buzz from her phone incited a jolt from her, but she reached for it regardless. Just a notification of a news article on the upcoming fashion week lineup for autumn.

Oh right, she's supposed to walk that. Bobby sent the contract over a week ago. Probably should look it over soon.

"Mira?" Rumi knocked softly, voice carrying through the door.

"One sec." She scrambled to pull joggers on, softly opening the door after.

"Hi." The lavender haired girl whispered.

"Hey."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..react like that I-"

"Rumi." Mira held up her hand. "Its okay."

"I know in my head it wasn't you guys up there. I guess my body just…doesn't…not yet at least."

"Really it's okay. I get it." Mira crossed her arms, gripping them tight. "I'm sorry I scared you.

"I know you didn't mean to." Rumi stepped forward. "It was a really sweet gesture."

Mira felt faint heat creep into her cheeks. Rumi was close enough to reach out to, to hold the soft hands off. That ache and yearning, which had long settled into her body, reared its head as she looked at Rumi. Her normally confident and radiant Rumi had looked so small these days, shrunk in on herself. Seeing her on the stage, demon patterns jagged and purple. The way she acted like a cornered animal. Mira could still feel when the honmoon shuddered at Rumi's desperate voice in her soul.

"Will you come back out?" Rumi pleaded.

Mira had never been able to say no to Rumi. Not when she got like this, her puppy eyes shining and lip pouting. It's been that way since they first became friends after they met. Was that a manipulation too? No no she's being paranoid now. Rumi cared about her. She knew she did.

"Yeah of course." Mira felt her own face soften.

Rumi lit up, both metaphorically and physically, her patterns flashed opal like color the second her eyes brightened and her smile returned. Mira's heart skipped over itself, stumbling into the messy feelings she has clutched to herself for years.

"Zoey got the snacks set up, all our favorites pulled out!" Rumi clapped lightly, her big grin showing.

"Sounds perfect. I'm going to grab a sweater and I'll meet you out there yeah?"

"Okay." Rumi turned and practically skipped down the hallway.

Mira stepped back, gripping her shirt over her heart. Oh how her heart gnawed at the rib cage bars holding it back. What a rabid, wild thing.

"Down girl." She whispered to herself.

She flicked through her closet and settled on a oversized charcoal grey hoodie. Using a silk ribbon, she knotted her hair half up. Enough to keep her hair out of her face, leaving the back down against her shoulders.

Time to..be normal..pretend that Rumi hasn't been able to hide demon marks her entire life.

"Mira!" Zoey leaned over the back of their couch. "Come join us under the blanket."

Rumi and Zoey were covered in a large blanket, the maknae arranging snack bags into piles. Rumi patted the couch next to her.

"Want to sit with me?" She asked sheepishly.

Mira nodded with a weak smile, sitting just close enough to brush their knees together. Her body still melted like warm candle wax at even the faintest brush of the patterned girl's touch. Her eyes traced over the lattice of opalescent lines adorning Rumi's body. The angry magenta glow gone now, replaced with something very..Rumi honestly.

Zoey put on the first of their movie marathon, a favorite of all of theirs, Mamma Mia. They belted their favorite songs, laughed and ate, until Rumi slowly leaned closer. Her head plopped lightly onto Mira's shoulder. She risked a glance downward, Rumi just chewed her chips and rested against her without a care in the world. As if nothing had happened and they had always been like this.

It was the most comfortable she had looked in months. As if she could hear Mira's thoughts and wanted to prove her wrong, she relaxed deeper into her side. Their bodies were practically flush together now.

"Oh oh Mira it's your favorite song!" Rumi grabbed her bicep softly.

Mira could only weakly laugh, too busy choking her heart back down into her chest. Rumi was absolutely ruining her without even trying. The guilt was weighing down from the night before. She didn't deserve this tenderness with Rumi. They hadn't discussed anything that happened. Why was she the only one not okay?

Rumi suddenly tucked her arms under the blanket, sitting up straighter and shrinking inward. Mira refocused, realizing she had been staring at Rumi's bare arms in her disassociating. Did…did Rumi think she had to hide them still? That guilt stung worse than her unresolved anger in this moment.

"Hey." She whispered gently. "You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine." Rumi's voice pitched up, her smile wide despite not reaching her eyes.

Mira recognized that tone now. The one that had slipped past her for years now.

Rumi was fucking lying.

She was lying again.

Mira stood up abruptly. She needed air. Needed space to cool herself off before she let this bubble over again. She made her way towards the elevator.

"Woah Mir, where's the fire?" Zoey yelled, startled by her exit.

"I just remembered I was supposed to work out." Mira responded flatly.

"Right now?" Zoey stood, following her.

"Yeah just, enjoy the movie I'll be back later."

"Mira hold on." Zoey tried to grab her.

"What Zoey?" Mira whipped around.

Zoey's eyes grew wide, the outburst causing her to retreat into herself. Just like last night when Mira left her alone.

"Zo hey I'm…I-m sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you." She tugged the younger girl into a hug.

Zoey eased into the embrace, tucking herself around Mira's waist tentatively. She buried her head into the taller girl's collar bone. Mira rubbed the back of the girl's head softly, soothing her. Rumi looked longingly at them from the couch.

"I'm so sorry I left you last night." Mira whispered. "I never should have gave up on you."

"I forgive you." Zoey squeezed tighter. "I know you were hurting extra."

Mira relaxed her grip, pulling away to wipe a single tear off Zoey's cheek. Her small sniffles broke apart the quiet anger Mira had been feeling.

"Will you at least finish the movie? You'll miss the ending." Zoey tugged her sleeve back towards their couch and Rumi.

The faint, deep blue glow emanating from Rumi stopped Mira short of answering. She had curled her knees up to her chest, arms tight around herself. Mira took a deep breath and moved back towards the couch, sitting gently next to Rumi. When their leader didn't react, she slipped her arm around her.

"Hey." Mira cooed.

Rumi slowly looked over, eyes red and teary. She wiped them away quickly, falling into her mask.

"Hi Mir." She smiled, not nearly as big as before.

"You okay?" She rubbed soft circles on her back.

"Yeah I'm fine, just worried about you two." She gritted through her newly fanged teeth.

"Is that really all?" Mira pressed, pulling back her hand.

"Yeah of course..why wouldn't it be?" Rumi paused.

"Well a lot happened. I figured you might have a lot more to say." Mira let some of her irritation soak in.

"No I'm okay." Rumi lied more. Mira could easily pick up the signs now. "I forgive you both really. I'm not upset."

"That so?" Mira challenged.

"Guys please stop." Zoey begged.

They both froze, Zoey stood a few feet away with her shoulders tense. Her hands gripped the hem of her shirt, clearly struggling to get the words she wanted to out.

"She said we're okay Mir..please." Zoey pleaded.

"Okay." Mira forced the air out.

She leaned back against the couch, no longer touching Rumi. Zoey sat up against Mira's side, cuddling up to her unnie. The movie resumed, no longer filled with their joined singing or laughter, but uncomfortable quiet. Mira felt her body heating up, repressing the urge to shout and run off and confront.

Until she saw Rumi shaking, so slightly it was easy to miss, goosebumps crawling over her patterned skin. Mira tugged off her hoodie, carefully handing it to her friend.

Rumi looked up at her, to the hoodie, then back. The hope that glimmered in her eyes made Mira feel lighter. Mira nodded, pushing it into her hands. Rumi gave a small, gentle smile and slipped her hoodie on.

"Thank you." Rumi whispered to her.

Mira gave a warm look back, lifting her other arm slightly. An invite.

Rumi cuddled under her arm and rested her hand on Mira's hip, her head tucked against the tall girl's neck. So Mira swallowed her anger and irritation for the moment, and just held Rumi and Zoey tight to her sides. Both girls nestled into her sides like they were carved to fit into her, like puzzle pieces.

"Who's your guys favorite dad?" Zoey piped up softly. "In the movie."

"I really like Sam." Rumi laughed softly. "Even if his actor isn't that great at singing. He really loves them so easily..and I'm a bit of a sucker for big gestures of affection in things."

"Mine is Bill." Zoey giggled. "The scene he's just wearing an apron makes me laugh so hard. Reminds me of my goofball dad."

"What about you Mir?" Rumi rubbed her thumb over Mira's stomach, sending a flutter up her body.

"Oh um..I always liked Harry best. He was so happy to just be there for Sophie without ever knowing if he was her dad..I always liked that about him." She mumbled tenderly. "The whole ending scene about being even a third of her father always makes me tear up."

"And he sings your favorite song." Zoey added.

"Yeah." Mira smiled. "I do love that song."

They settled into a more comfortable quiet, Rumi's thumb kept rubbing gently against her hip, driving Mira up the wall it was so tender. How could she be so affectionate after what happened…what Mira did when Rumi begged her for help. Mira's eyes grew heavy surrounded by their warmth.

Mira's hoodie was warm and soft on Rumi's skin. The smell of Mira's perfume soaked into it. She smells like cloves and incense smoke with a hint of cherry blossom notes, warm and floral and…comforting. Like a soft, autumn spiced embrace. She could hear Mira's heart beat and breathing steady, she brushed over her body slowly with her thumb. She could tell Mira was mad. She always could see right through Rumi's walls, but before she had Mira's trust in her word keeping her safe.

Now she broke that.

There was no way Mira trusted her anymore.

She had to earn it back. She had to.

I can't live in a future where you aren't there.

"Rumi look." Zoey whispered, tapping her. "Mira fell asleep."

She looked up, serene beauty plastered across Mira's sleeping face. How was she so pretty? Rumi sat up slowly, moving her cheek to rest against Mira's toned shoulder.

"I'm sorry there's so much tension.. because of me." Rumi muttered.

"Its all of us Ru. Its okay." Zoey reached to touch her arm. "We'll be okay. You guys will be okay."

Zoey gave her a knowing look. What exactly she knew, Rumi wasn't sure of.

"Mira's really mad at me.. isn't she.." Rumi mumbled.

"Well she can't be that mad if she's asleep with you cuddled up to her." Zoey giggled quietly, stifling her laughter from rising.

Rumi blushed, soft pink glow emanating from her patterns. She nestled tighter into Mira's side, indulging herself just a bit to enjoy the rose haired girl's comforting embrace.

"I'm glad she dozed off though. I don't think she slept last night. I heard her really late a couple times."

"Really?" Rumi looked up to her, now noticing the bags under her eyes thinly veiled by make up. "I didn't really sleep well either."

"I think I just collapsed from exhaustion." Zoey sighed.

"Yeah I bet." Rumi cast her eyes downward to Mira's hands.

"I'm gonna go play a game I think." Zoey whispered, slowly unfurling herself from Mira's arm.

"What are you gonna play?" Rumi nuzzled against Mira's chest.

"I was thinking of streaming Hollow Knight or something." Zoey stretched her arms above her head.

"Oh is that the one with the little beetle knight guy?" Rumi looked up.

"Yeah!" She beamed.

Rumi giggled, holding her finger up to her lips to hush them both. Zoey playfully zipped her mouth shut, skipping back to her room. The living area was now quiet except for Mira's soft breathes and the pattering of rain on glass. Rumi pulled the blanket over both of them tighter, her own eyes starting to drift closed from the cozy warmth of being cuddled up to Mira.

This felt good. She liked this. Rumi had to fix things between them so she could keep this. She gripped Mira's shirt, brushing the tip of her nose against her neck. The weight of Mira's arm around her was grounding. Rumi closed her eyes, resting into the soft blanket cocoon around them.

""Don't leave.. don't leave!" Rumi screamed, stepping towards them, her hand twisted into a purple claw. Mira and Zoey backed away, barely taking full steps from their leader.

Patterns..

Demon patterns…

Rumi was covered in them. Glowing and angry and jagged all over her. The mark of their sworn enemy and reason they're together.

"I can still FIX IT!" Rumi's voice ripped out of her with a harsh gravel, sending a magenta flare across the Honmoon. Mira could feel it in her gut.

Mira felt her eyes go wide. Her heart throbbed in agony, seeing Rumi like…this.

All this time..all the…lies.

She just watched Rumi rip holes in the Honmoon with her voice alone. Working with demons..Jinu...the train..all those people. Gone.

Rumi trusted a demon she just met more than her teammates. More than her. Mira fought back tears and choked down any pleas she had in her. She had to protect everything they stood for.

Her hands shook despite her efforts to steady them, her Gok-do tucked under her arm in a manner that wouldn't let her use it properly. She didn't want to hurt Rumi. She wasn't sure if she even could. All she could hope for was that it would be enough to make her not lash out at them. Rumi's eyes fell to the weapon, tears forming in her eyes. She ripped her half demon eyes back up to Mira, searching for any sign of comfort to be given.

"Zoey please…" Rumi begged, turning to their maknae and stepping forward.

Zoey sniffled, holding up two shin-kal.

Rumi moved towards them, arms outstretched. Mira moved in front of Zoey.

"Stay back." she pointed her weapon further, her voice trembled so deeply within her that it hurt.

"Mira don't..please." Rumi stretched for her.

"Rumi.. don't make me do this." Mira choked out.

Rumi moved closer, going to step around the glowing weapon towards her.

She doesn't know why it happens. The blade sliding through Rumi's sternum with a sick, rattling crack. Mira's hands gripped tight as she twists, snapping open Rumi's sternum like a walnut breaking. Zoey backs away from her, hand covering her mouth. Rumi collapses to her knees, pulling the Gok-do deeper, Mira closer.

"I knew you had it in you..violent, pretty thing." A voice nothing like Rumi's echoed out, a wicked grin plastered across her fanged face.

Rumi felt Mira shaking beneath her cheek, waking her from her slumber. She sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes. Mira's face was contorted, her breath uneven, she was slick with sweat. The blanket was tightly balled in her hands as they squeezed closed. Rumi reached gently to brush her cheek.

"Hey Mira?" She caressed softly. "Wake up Mir."

Mira twitched against the touch, flinching. Rumi shifted above her, brushing her damp hair back.

"Hey hey love it's okay." Rumi ushered.

Mira jolted awake, eyes wide, her hand flew over her mouth. She practically threw Rumi off of her, running to the nearest bathroom and slamming her knees into the tile. She vomited into the toilet, shoulders shaking and heaving as she started to be aware of her surroundings. Rumi knelt next to her, pulling her hair back for her.

"Shh shh it's okay Mir I got you." She soothed.

"Please don't-" Mira scooted back. "Please don't touch me I just..I need a second."

"Oh I'm..I'm sorry." Rumi recoiled.

"Sorry just…nightmare." Mira let out ragged breaths. "I just..need to collect myself or I'll get overstimulated."

"Okay." Rumi sat with her hands in her lap. "Is there.. anything I can do?"

"I'll be fine." Mira leaned back, sweat sticking hair to her face.

Rumi looked her over, she looked sickly and scared. Rumi wasn't used to seeing Mira as anything other than a tall, powerful goddess of a woman. To see her slumped on the bathroom floor, having nightmares so bad she throws up, it made a sharp pain twinge Rumi's heart.

"Mira I.." Rumi stammered.

She tilted those sharp, crimson brown eyes upward towards her—looking through her eyelashes. There were faint glimmers of wet in her eyes, like she could cry at any moment.

"I'm sorry..about all this..about..me." Rumi covered her arms with her hands.

"Don't hide." Mira muttered. "Don't think for a second I want you to hide those again."

Rumi lowered her hands, sliding closer across the floor. Mira's mouth remained in a steady line, eyes scanning over her intently. Rumi felt those siren eyes taking in every micro expression, every breath, every sigh. She wouldn't be able to hide anything anymore. Especially with her patterns displaying her deep emotions for all to see.

She didn't like it.

"It wouldn't be new to hide them. If they're too much I mean." Rumi leaned against the sink cabinet.

"You aren't too much." Mira offered softly. "You have this free ability to tell me what you're thinking and feeling whenever you want to..only if you want to."

"Thank you." Rumi sighed, shoulders relaxing slightly.

Mira slowly pulled herself up, spitting into the sink and rinsing her mouth out. Rumi stood, giving her space, but ready to comfort her if need be.

"You look sleepy." Rumi tentatively stepped closer.

"Yeah." Mira leaned on her palms against the sink. "A bit."

"Do you..want to lay down again? I could stay with you..if you want." Rumi tried not too sound too hopeful.

"I think I'll go downstairs to the gym a bit." Mira rubbed her eyes. "I need to blow off steam."

"Do you want company?"

"Not right now Ru.." Mira wouldn't meet her gaze.

Rumi shuffled in place, debating if she should say what she's really wondering. She decides to ask, even if the answer may burn too much for her fragile heart to bare.

"Do you hate me?", her voice barely above a whisper.

Mira whipped her head towards her, eyes wide.

"Did you seriously just fucking ask me that?" She scoffed. "Wait do you actually think I could hate you? After everything? After being friends since we were 16?"

"I-I don't know you've just been kinda distant today and I was worried-" Rumi mumbled.

"I've been distant?" Mira barked out a laugh. "That's rich coming from you Rumi."

"That's not fair." Rumi bit back.

"No you know what? What's not fair is you and Zoey being able to pretend to forgive and forget all this while I'm stuck here feeling like the only one still angry about this!" Mira's voice started to rise.

"Mira I'm just trying to move forward!" Rumi matched her volume.

"You haven't even acknowledged the thing you're moving forward from!" Mira spat. "You lied right to my face for years Rumi."

"Fine okay yeah I'm angry!" Rumi grit her teeth. "Is that what you want to hear?"

"No I want to know why..say why you're mad!" Mira looked over her darkly.

"Mira I don't-"

"Say it Rumi."

"Mira please-"

"Say it."

Rumi kept quiet, patterns lightly glowing magenta. Her nails dug into her palms, leaving deep creases in her porcelain skin.

"Say it!" Mira shoved her lightly.

"You raised your weapon at me!" She finally let herself roar. "You turned on me when I was begging you to listen to me and then when I ran away you stayed behind!"

"You have no idea what I was feeling then!" Her face came inches away from Rumi's. "Fuck I spent months, no years worrying about you. All the long sleeves and layers and I thought..I thought you were-" her voice cracked higher than Rumi had ever heard it.

Rumi kept quiet, letting her continue.

"My entire world came shattering down on me last night. Fuck I wasn't even sure it was you at first until you..y-you looked so scared and I..I wanted it to be fake. I wanted it to be a trick, but then you came backstage and I saw. You." Mira gripped herself tight, coughing out words in her low rumble. "You worked with demons before you trusted us, trusted me! You lied to my face when I asked what was going on and after everything that happened I had no idea what your intentions were."

"I was trying to fix me..so we could all be together and save the world and..and.." her throat stung. "I thought if I could convince Jinu to help me I could..finally be free. I paid the price for it..he betrayed me in the worst way he could think of."

It was Mira's turn to still. Rumi watched her stand up rigid. Her mind spiked with the memory, still fresh and raw. Mira and Zoey tearing at her, shoving her. Demons using Mira's voice to call her a mistake. Zoey's to sing their hateful lyrics at her. All the words Jinu had heard her say at their meet above the city, with the exchange of a bracelet. Of hope.

Used against her with the voices she loved the most and cherished.

Mira tugged her against her chest suddenly, Rumi jolted with the touch, tensing under the taller girl's arms for a moment.

"I'm sorry for what happened." Mira whispered to her gently. "I know you're hurting too just…please…talk to me about it. Don't hide from me anymore I can't bare it."

Rumi clung tight to the back of Mira's shirt, sobbing into her chest. Even when Mira was furious with her, she still held her. Both with her strong arms and her soft clothes enveloping Rumi now. Her patterns angry shade dulled to a soft periwinkle, her head tucked against Mira's neck. She could see her tears staining the pale blue fabric on her torso. Mira didn't seem to care as her hand caressed the back of Rumi's head.

"I never wanted to lie." Rumi squeaked out. "I wanted to tell you for so long."

"So why didn't you?"

"Celine said nothing could change between us until the patterns were gone..that you guys wouldn't understand."

"We haven't lived under her roof for 5 years now Rumi."

"I never needed to hear Gwi-Ma's voice in my ear..I had Celine's." Rumi whimpered. "My whole life she told me the patterns needed to be fixed. I believe her."

"We could have helped you. I would have helped you if you had just..talked to me."

Rumi pushed away from her slowly, letting her arms fall to her sides.

"Would you though?" Rumi let an edge deep down sharpen her voice. "Or would you have just put me down like a rabid dog.."

Mira scoffed, disbelief painted into her sharp features. Her mouth formed a scowl.

"Seriously?" Her voice was dangerously low. "If you think the way I reacted last night is at all how things would have been if I had known, if you hadn't lied to my face nights ago, then maybe you don't really know me at all."

Mira shoved past her, leaving Rumi staring at her own blurry reflection through tears. It hurt worst than hatred.

It hurt because there was boundless care and tenderness in every moment she shared with Mira before this. The harmonic echo she heard the moment they met still warms her to this day. The Honmoon pulled them tight together until their souls bled into new colors she couldn't even fathom or put words to, just feelings.

She clung to them now. The semblance of Mira's essence that was absent when she left. She felt empty where her hands had been, caressing her and holding her tight.

How could she possibly fit so many shards of glass back into a mirror?

Mira had secluded herself the last few days. She hated how she handled things, how she boiled over. Why didn't she know how to be more gentle, softer? Rumi deserved to know more than the angry surface thoughts. She was hurting and sad and lost in heartache. Why can't she ever just let light shine on her negative thoughts?

Pathetic.

Her fist plastered against the white leather of the punching bag.

Weak.

Another strike, harder this time. Her hand stung with the force.

Coward.

A crimson splatter broke out of her bare knuckle against the white leather, obscene in contrast. It burns.

Violent fuck up.

The blood smeared over her other knuckles, painting a vulgar blush to her skin.

You should've been there.. should've chased after her like your heart begged you to.

More burning, the portrait of violence bloomed broader across the bag. Old sting faded and blended into the new, continuous in its relentless jolts.

You don't deserve her. Never have. Never will.

Her hands started to drip now, droplets speckling the floor.

You are nothing.

The splatter grew outward, splattering and flinging all directions.

She'll hate you as much as you hate yourself now.

Mira let out a scream laced with agony and ache, collapsing against the bag, hugging it to herself. The blood soaked into her sports bra, stained her skin, and smeared against her face. Her hands felt numb and wet, the sticky blood beginning to clot between her fingers.

"Fuck.." she sobbed out.

Her tears made rivers through the blood, clearing pathways in the carmine mess she had made here.

She had seen the footage now. The Idol Awards Takedown performance. Visages of her and Zoey as they tore Rumi open on stage. She could still hear Rumi's begging cries. The scream that shattered the lights. God it hurt.

She would rip those demons limb from limb for handling her so shamefully.

Why did she raise her Gok-do..

Why did she stand her ground when all Rumi needed was to be held and comforted. She should have gone to her and let her collapse. Let her fall apart in safety. Once again her anger and fury had clawed its way to the surface and made her make the worst possible decisions. She was hurt and hurt Rumi in return.

Why did Rumi have to fucking lie?

And why did it not make her love her any less.

She was still hopelessly smitten with her. Standing here, beating the shit out of herself like a brute, she remembers the first time Rumi made her heart sing.

"Mira are you busy?" Rumi leaned in her room.

Mira pulled her headphones down, turning in her desk chair to face Rumi. She always looks so pretty. Her long pink hair and perfect make up, the way her muscles rippled during training. Rumi gripped the box tighter in her hands.

"No just writing some lyric and choreo ideas. What's up?" Mira's sultry voice like cello.

"I uh.. Celine mentioned it was your birthday." She thrust the box forward awkwardly.

"You..got me a gift?" Mira spoke slowly, hands carefully taking the package.

Rumi watched her gently unwrap the paper, careful like it would shatter in her grasp. It was sweet, the tenderness she hid away until they were alone. In the year they've known each other, they've butt heads several times over practice and training. Mira used to snap at her often, annoyed at her perfectionist nature. Now, in quiet moments, Mira got comfortable enough to be herself around Rumi.

"I hope you like it." Rumi offered, a knot forming in her throat.

Mira pulled out the soft, velvet choker from the box. Rumi had noticed her looking at it the last time Celine took them all out. The fabric necklace had a small, silver charm hanging off of it. Mira rubbed the velvet between her fingers, twirling the charm.

"How did you know I wanted this?" Mira asked softly.

"I saw you looking at it. It's not often you go out of your way to look at something when we're out. You don't seem to treat yourself much." Rumi stepped in closer, resting her hand on Mira's shoulder tentatively.

Mira didn't say a word, just stared down at the jewelry in her hands. Rumi pulled away, suddenly feeling a pit drop in her stomach.

"Mir-" she started.

Mira stood and took her into a huge hug, nearly lifting her off the ground. The long, strong arms took up her whole torso and brought them flush together. Rumi's body suddenly felt very, very hot. Not quite like her usual anxious heat.. something different. Something new.

"Thank you." Mira's breath tickled her ear, sending chills down between her hip bones.

"N-no problem." Rumi was practically holding her breath now.

She indulgingly gripped around Mira's waist, bringing their hips together. The taller girl's breath hitched in her throat. Rumi inhaled her perfume, heady and warm. The mixed notes of spices and autumn florals on her slightly sun-kissed skin.

"Can I..put it on for you?" Rumi asked sheepishly.

"Y-yeah." Mira pulled away, her cheeks flushed in a way Rumi only saw when they trained.

Rumi slipped the choker around Mira's neck, noticing how soft her skin is. Once it was clipped in the back, she stepped away to look her over.

"It looks really good on you Mir." Rumi smiled.

"Yeah?"

Mira moved to her mirror, inspecting her new accessory. Rumi saw the normally stern face of her teammate melt into something soft. Relaxed brows, an upturned mouth, even her alluring sharp eyes had a roundness to them as her pupils dilated. She turned back to face Rumi.

"This..means a lot to me. I'm not used to getting things I actually like for..days like this." Mira cast her eyes downward.

"Um day like this." Rumi corrected.

"What?" Mira snorted a laugh out, brow raised.

"You said days plural, but there's only one you. So only one special day dedicated to you..to me at least." Rumi made sure to catch her eyes on the final words that left her tongue.

Mira's face went as pink as her hair.

"That's um..wow okay." She stuttered. "Thank you Rumi."

Say my name again. Say it in that way you speak like you're uttering prayers.

Rumi sat in her room reminiscing, flipping through photo albums as her fingers rested on the picture from Mira's 17th birthday. She looked so soft and happy in it, arm slung around Rumi. The choker that she still wore all the time looked so young and new here.

She flipped the page and lingered on another memory, one of the first time Mira beat her while sparring. Mira stood sweaty and worn out, gok-do slung over both shoulders as she made double 'rock on' hand gestures.

Rumi flicked her saingeom effortlessly against Mira's strikes, parrying each swing with poise and strength. Her shoulders buckled from the powerful force Mira wielded. It was impressive to say the least, the way she used such a heavy weapon so elegantly. Mira fought like a ballerina, graceful and precise. Rumi dodged beneath a swing, knocking the hilt of her sword into Mira's ribs.

"Fuck!" Mira coughed out.

"Too slow." Rumi teased.

"You are insufferable." Mira resumed her stance.

"Yet you train with me every other day like it's your favorite thing."

"Oh please like you don't come knocking on my door if I try to skip out." Mira smirked, striking forward with a twirl.

"T-that not..always true." Rumi blushed, she slipped on the block slightly.

Mira swept her leg low, taking out Rumi's legs. She hit the dirt, back flat to the ground as Mira straddled her. The long handle of her weapon pinned Rumi down, with Mira leaning over her.

"Ha!" Mira panted, "I finally got you!"

Rumi's heart pounded against the ground, reverberating through her entire chest. She was painfully aware of how warm Mira's thighs felt locked around her hips. Her face was flush and sweat gripped above her, mouth partially open in a grin as her breath escaped her. Mira sat back, dissipating her weapon and brushing stray hairs back into her ponytail. Her hips rubbed forward slightly as she moved, causing white hot ache to form inside Rumi just below her.

"Y-you sure did." Rumi choked out, arms itching to reach for the hips perfectly perched on her.

"Don't worry princess the score is still Mira 1 and Rumi 1000." She laughed lightly.

Rumi swallowed hard, eyes glossing over Mira's lithe form. Strong and elegant and beautiful.

Oh how she longed to touch without an excuse. To let Mira touch her without an escape ready for the eventual problem of hiding her patterns.

Mira stood carefully, offering her wrapped hands to Rumi. The second their hands clasped it was like the Honmoon was reaching to tie them together. Rumi ached to hold on, but gripping someone so tightly would only end in claw marks when she ripped herself away.

"Zoey mentioned wanting to go to the bath house. Do you want to join us?" Mira pleaded.

Yes absolutely I want to do nothing, but be close to you always. I need you. Just say that I'm yours.

"I think I'll skip and just get a cold shower. I'm pretty sore and overheated already." Rumi lied.

"Okay..well, offer is there if you change your mind." Mira looked downcast as she walked away.

Rumi couldn't help, but watch the sway of those hips and smooth glide of her stride. Mira was intoxicating. They hardly fought these days, not like when they first met. Now it was all playful, competitive nature and affection.

Rumi knew right there that any chance of her falling for someone else had rot away, leaving only space for Mira's soul to nestle into hers.

Someday, once these patterns were gone, maybe she'd have a chance.

The warmth that spread through Rumi at the memory was precious and made her feel whole. She hadn't actually seen Mira in days since their fight. Zoey saw her briefly in passing, but could never get Mira to hold still long enough to talk.

So instead she flipped through photographs, giving herself the vague sensation of Mira's presence. A way to see her ardent grin when it made an appearance. Mira has only grown more beautiful with age. Each year that passes as Rumi flips through is a new level of attraction developed towards her. Features getting sharper and more mature, her body more toned and svelte in all the right ways.

There was a soft knock at her door.

"Come in!" She called from her chair in the corner.

Zoey poked her head in, a worried expression taking over her usual color. Rumi sat up stiffly.

"What's wrong?" Rumi implored, dropping the album.

"Can..can you come downstairs with me a sec?" Her voice was broken and quiet.

"Yeah of course." Rumi followed her.

The elevator ride was quite, Zoey folded in on herself. Rumi stayed near and waited patiently for her to explain.

"Mira is out right now so the gym is free." Her voice was a gentle lull. "So I thought I'd do some cardio earlier."

"Okay?" Rumi raised a brow.

"There's.. something you should see."

"Zoey what is it?"

"You need to see I can't-" The younger girls voice broke.

"Okay okay I'll look." Rumi locked up.

They arrived at the gym floor and stepped in, the sterile cleaner and faint sweat smell in the air. Zoey grabbed her leader's hand, pulling her towards the smaller back room.

"In there." Zoey stopped short of entering.

Rumi rounded the corner and scanned the room. Weights stacked along the wall, a pull ups bar mounted, towels folded on the shelf and-

Her eyes locked on the dried scarlet mark on the punching bag.

"Wha-" Rumi went close, touching the leather bag just around the stain.

"I..I saw Mira a couple days ago…her hands were bandaged." Zoey teared up. "She.. she's hurting herself Ru."

Rumi didn't have words, her eyes glued to Mira's blood all over the bag. Layered and caked on itself from days of use. Her perfect, soft hands were somewhere else in tatters. Just past the bag she could see bloody rags and shirts heaped into the trash can on the wall.

"Mira." Rumi whimpered.

"You guys need to talk about this." Zoey interrupted her thoughts from the doorway.

"I know." She sniffled.

"I don't want to watch you two fall apart any further. You both care about each other too much."

"I miss her so much." Rumi broke, hand resting next to the stain.

"Then go to her. Make her see you and talk about this."

"Okay." Rumi rubbed her cheeks, smearing her tears away. "I will."

Chapter Text

The afternoon sun warmed Mira's shoulders through her maroon bomber jacket, her usual ball cap keeping it out of her eyes. The streets were quiet and low volume for a week day, which worked in her favor to get her shopping done. She had run out of medical supplies in her personal first aid kit. The bandages peaked out from under her fingerless gloves, for the most part tucked out of sight just in case.

"Okay med supplies, pain killers, and now I just need more whiskey." She mumbled, reading her list off her phone.

She crossed the intersection to the liquor mart. The harsh white lighting in these stores always hurt her eyes. She scanned over the selection, settling on a Ki One single malt. The cashier gave her a look as he checked her out.

"Are you in that idol group? Hunters or something?" He grumbled.

"Never heard of em." She shrugged.

"You look just like the mean one in that group."

"Unlucky me I suppose." Mira grit through her teeth.

She grabbed the bag and sped out, shoulders hugging her ears. Her foot tapped aggressively on the sidewalk as she waited to cross.

"Fucking mean one? Seriously?" She mumbled to herself.

Mira let her face scowl up, until she felt a light tap at her arm. She turned, seeing a young girl in a Huntrix hoodie. She really wasn't hitting the jackpot on not getting recognized today.

"Excuse me," the girl asked sweetly. "Are you really Mira?"

She smiled warmly, leaning down onto her knees to be eye level with the girl.

"Yes I am sweetie. What can I do for you?" Her voice syrupy and soft.

"Could I get your autograph? A-and maybe a picture?" She asked shyly, notebook in hand.

"Of course love, do you have a pen?" She set her bags down.

"Yes! I even have a pink one." She handed a pink glitter pen over. "I really like your hair."

"I see that." She twirled the small pink streak in the girl's hair. "The color suits you well."

"T-thank you!" She squealed.

"Now what's your name sweetie?" She uncapped the pen and took the notebook.

"Nari." She bounced on her heels.

"What a pretty name for a pretty young girl." Mira complimented. "Are you in school Nari?"

"Yes I'm year 2 in middle school this year."

"Oh that's a big one. What's your favorite subject?"

"Literature!" She pushed her book club pin on her backpack forward to show Mira.

"Oh man that was my favorite too." Mira chuckled. "And obviously music as well."

"H-here!" The girl rifled through her bag, pulling out a matching pin. "You can join our book club! The school posts our monthly reads."

She took the pin, handing the sweet girl back her notebook. She popped the pin onto her jacket, right above her heart.

"I am honored. I'll be sure to bookmark the page and read what you're getting into." Mira patted the girl's head, noting the school logo on her bag. "Now how are we taking a picture?"

"My phone please." She handed it over unlocked, a photo of Mira dancing on stage was her wallpaper.

"Alrighty say Golden!" Mira beamed, giving a small heart sign in the photo with her fingers.

"Golden!" Nari smiled big, a small gap visible now where she was missing a tooth.

"Okay now you get home safe Nari. I'll do the same yeah?" Mira held out her pinkie.

"I promise!" Nari took Mira's pinkie in her own, squealing excitedly.

The girl ran off, notebook and phone glued to her face. Mira smiled and took her bags, feeling lighter than she had in days. The rest of the trip home was peaceful, warm. Mira felt like she let out a breath she had been holding.

The elevator took her up to their penthouse, which was…eerily quiet. Not a sound from either girl's bedrooms. Rumi was pretty quiet, but Zoey? There was always something playing or she was streaming just.. something.

Mira pushed into her room, tossing her hat and jacket aside, and opened up all her bags, heading to her bathroom. She popped open the whiskey, taking a sharp swig. It burned her throat and warmed her chest, giving her a little boost for the hard part.

"Okay…let's see." She sat on her stool.

She tugged her gloves off with a bit of struggle, the leather catching on the bundled up bandages. Slowly, she unfurled the sticky, day old bandages she hadn't had the supplies to replace this morning. She winced as she got down to flesh, gauze tugging at her flayed and tattered skin. On both hands she had busted each knuckle now, the middle ones being the most gruesome. What had been able to form of scabs ripped away, oozing fresh crimson onto her porcelain skin.

"Shit-" she hissed through her teeth.

Moving the tendons caused an uncomfortable pop as she opened fresh gauze and dabbed antiseptic onto a cotton ball.

"Okay..3..2…1.." she pressed the liquid into the wounds lightly, the sting immediately causing her to wince.

"Fuck that hurts." She shook out her left hand as she took another long drink.

She washed the rest away with warm water and soap, inspecting the wound once it was dabbed dry. The gashes were angry and red, hinting at possible infection on her middle knuckle. Fuck that one was deep. She pressed fresh gauze into her hand, wrapping the bandage carefully around it. The pain was her reminder. It would make her better. It had to make her better. She deserved to be punished.

"You deserve this." The belt snapped over her hands, her father glaring down at her.

She bit her lip till she tasted iron, forcing her tears back. The two streaks of pink hair framing her face the only color in the room that matched her knuckles.

"This is what happens when you do wrong Mira. Remember this pain. Use it to fix your mistakes." He spat.

Another strike across her knuckles, flat against the table. Mira winced hard.

"I have to fix it." She wrapped her hand tighter.

"I deserve this." Another tight curl of bandage. "I don't deserve her."

Mira looked in the mirror, cracked from her outburst the other night. She could be mistaken as a corpse with these dark circles. She was sunken, bleak.

She grabbed the whiskey bottle, stumbling to her balcony. She slumped down to the floor, back pressed into the glass. The city laid beneath her, lights twinkling and sounds echoing up to her ivory tower she's locked herself in. The sun was setting now. The sky bled into a beautiful watercolor, warm with rose and persimmon hues. She let liquor burn her throat until her eyes got heavy enough to force her into sleep.

Zoey leaned against the gym wall, perched on a long bench as Rumi paced back and forth.

"I don't even know what to say to her." Rumi wrung her hands.

"Please stop bleeding all over the gym would be a good start." Zoey tugged at her shirt.

"What if she doesn't want to see me?"

"She always wants to see you."

"That can't be true." Rumi laughed half-heartedly.

"Its totally true Rumi she's such a simp for you."

"Wait what?" Rumi turned around, her pacing halted.

"You seriously didn't pick up on that?" Zoey snickered.

"No?" Rumi rubbed her face. "How was I supposed to know it's not like I've ever..done this before."

"Rumi people flirt with you all the time."

"Yeah fans flirting and other idols sure, they don't know me well enough to go beyond surface stuff. I know I'm pretty. I was raised to be an idol. To be everyone's type..but Mira…she knows all the ugly things about me now." Rumi shrunk inward. "Why would she still like me at this point?"

"I'm sorry what 'ugly things' are you referring to? Your patterns? Cause those aren't ugly Ru." Zoey gestured pointedly.

"I'm a half demon compulsive liar with bad communication skills what on earth could she want me for." Rumi spit out.

"Wow okay damn." Zoey whistled. "I didn't think you the pity party type."

"Pity party?" Rumi scoffed.

"Rumi." Zoey raised her brow. "Come on seriously. Do you think Mira really only sees you that way?"

"I-I don't know."

"The answer is no..she doesn't. Mira see's all of you. You two have always been close one way or another. It hurt us both, learning what a big secret you kept. But Mira is especially feeling the gut punch of it. You know how much pride she has in her ability to read people, for you to have effortlessly fooled her for years, it's a big blow."

"Zoey I-" Rumi sat with her. "I'm sorry I lied for so long."

"I understand why you did. You were scared we would see you differently."

"I was scared you'd hate me."

"Never."

"I couldn't know that." Rumi sniffled.

"I know unnie." Zoey hugged her tight from the side. "I'm sorry I didn't trust you when you needed it most."

"I'm sorry I broke your trust." Rumi gripped the younger girl's arms.

They sat there a moment, tears welling in both their eyes as understanding was found. Zoey pulled away, wiping her eyes.

"My trust isn't broken, just so you know." Zoey admitted softly.

"How isn't it?" Rumi rubbed her own thighs.

"It just.. isn't. I'd still put my life in your hands if I needed to and feel safe." Zoey shrugged. "And I hope, with some time, you can trust me again."

"Doesn't it bother you..the idea that I..I don't entirely?" Rumi looked to her.

"It does, but..I know it's not permanent. We'll all be okay." Zoey smiled with that summers day warmth she contained.

"You are ridiculous." Rumi laughed.

"Yes, but you both love me so." She giggled.

"Why can't talking to Mira be this easy?" Rumi put her head in her hands.

"Because our girl kind of came to us 3 levels of traumatized already." Zoey offered. "She kind of depends on clear communication to function, you know how she is."

"Yeah I do." Rumi rubbed her temples. "But she's also so wonderful."

"She is." Zoey leaned back on her hands "tell me what you love about her."

Rumi blushed with a soft rose hue, patterns matching with a gentle pulse of light. Zoey tilted her head, waiting for the answer.

"I..I really admire her passion. The way she dances and sings..it mesmerizes me." Rumi started. "She is so genuine and kind at her core. Even in my worst moments, just her touch is so comforting to me. She always looks so pretty and smells so nice. I like her smile, the real one where her nose crinkles."

"I know what you mean." Zoey chuckled. "She hates it."

"But it's so cute." Rumi spoke more enthusiastically now. "Oh and her laugh where she snorts a little. I like that too."

"You two are so competitive you're even competing for who is more smitten." Zoey nudged her.

"I think I win that one." Rumi giggled.

"I don't knowwww." Zoey drawled. "Mira said some pretty flowery, poetic shit about you when I asked her."

"Wait when did you do that?" Rumi smacked her arm.

"The world tour." Zoey grinned. "I got bored just watching her stare at you all the time."

"So…what did she say?" Rumi tucked her head between her knees.

"Ask her yourself." Zoey stood up, stretching. "Let's go back up and wait for her."

"Ugh no fair." Rumi clasped her hand. "You better not tell her what I said."

"My lips are sealed."

They stood at the elevator, expecting it to open right away. Zoey watched it return down from the top floor.

"Mira must have got back while we were gone." Zoey muttered.

"Do you really think she…that she'll forgive me?" Rumi hugged herself tight.

"Do you think you'll forgive her?" Zoey retorted.

"…Yes." Rumi assured.

"Then she will do the same."

Mira couldn't let go of her weapon. It was as if her hands had fused to it. The thrum of Rumi's fading pulse echoed into her bones.

Rumi was pinned beneath her, Gok-do thrust all the way through her stomach and into the ground. Blood seeped out into the dirt beneath them.

"Please let me stop!" Mira begged, yanking against the pull of her weapon.

The blood coiled into tendrils, crawling up the weapon and Mira's arms. Their vice-like grip left inky, maroon stains on her skin. Rumi sat up slowly, the blade cleaving upward through her with a wet, obscene sucking noise.

"You'll never stop hurting me Mira." The odd imitation of Rumi's voice uttered.

Her clawed hands grasped Mira's face, pulling them close together, her fanged mouth only a breath away.

"We both know you've always been doomed." She grinned, all fangs and malice.

Their lips crashed together, Mira fought to pull away, but the fangs bit and pinned her in place. The taste of blood and liquor was harsh on her lips. Tears streamed down her face.

"Please stop.." she cried weakly. "I need to save you. Please I need you."

Mira was trapped there, caught in a painful kiss of sanguine violence. This wasn't all she was. It couldn't be. She had to be better. Be braver.

"Please." She sobbed, gripping Rumi's body to her chest, the cold seeping in.

Rumi knocked at Mira's door again, still no answer. She wasn't a heavy sleeper, the knocks and calls should have woke her if she fell asleep.

"Mira?" She said louder.

No answer. Should she?

Rumi gingerly turned the door knob, leaning her head in the door. The light were off, Mira's bed untouched. Rumi was about to close the door when a cool breeze carried a quiet sob to her demonic enhanced ears.

The balcony door was open.

She clicked the door shut behind her. The cold night air bit at her skin once she moved onto the balcony. Mira was curled up in a ball, sobbing in her sleep, whiskey bottle empty next to her. Rumi knelt down slowly.

"Mira?" She whispered gently.

The way Mira flinched awake was so aggressive it was startling. Rumi blinked away her alarm, taking in Mira's flush cheeks and bloody bandages.

"Get the fuck off me!" She shrieked, throwing the empty bottle.

Rumi ducked, the bottle shattered against the floor. "Mira it's me.. it's- it's Rumi."

"No no no you're lying. Rumi's gone I killed her." Mira sobbed out. "I killed her…I killed her. I'm a m-monster."

Rumi felt the horror settle into her face. What on earth was happening right now? Mira was completely drunk and rambling. There were harsh red marks down her arms where she seems to have been clawing at herself. She moved closer slowly. The pink haired girl lurched suddenly, vomiting off the balcony. Her head pressed into the metal bars.

"Mira? Can I touch you?" She asked softly.

"But you're so gentle a-and I don't…I don't deserve it.." she slurred, calmer for a moment.

"You do deserve it." Rumi teared up. "Please come here Mira, let me get you to bed."

Mira gripped her head, shaking it back and forth.

"No no I can't." She trembled. "I have to stay with her she'll get too cold."

Rumi heart cracked. What could she have possibly been having a nightmare about that warrants this? What broke her into such a fragile state? She had to try and out logic Mira in her drunken, illogical state.

"Hey Mira, can you look at me love?" Rumi grazed her jaw with her fingertips.

"Rumi?" She turned, deep grey marks under her eyes. "Y-you're okay?"

She collapsed forward, barely able to sit up. Her arms snaked around Rumi's waist, tugging her close. Rumi felt heat crawl up her spine from where Mira's hands rested.

"I am okay." Rumi hugged her back. "Can you come inside with me I'm…getting cold out here."

Mira staggered up without a thought, pulling Rumi up with her. She slumped backwards into the wall, forcing Rumi forward against her. Rumi felt her leg dip between Mira's and her face hit the tall girl's chest.

"Rumi I'm so-sorry I hurt y-you." She cried against Rumi's hair, twirling the braid around her fingers. "I'm s"pose to keep you safe."

"You do keep me safe Mira." Rumi tried to pull back to look at her, but apparently liquor made Mira ten times stronger. "Let's get you inside."

They shifted together, Mira's weight difficult to balance for Rumi on her own with their height difference. They staggered into the room, closing the balcony door and broken glass behind them.

"Alright you need to get to bed missy." Rumi heaved them towards the mattress.

"No.." Mira slurred. "I don't sleep anymore."

Her voice was so broken, wavering with a somber falter. Rumi wanted nothing more right now than to get her a good night's sleep. Not worry about talking. Not amend things right now. Just for Mira to sleep.

"Come on Mir, into bed you go." Rumi moved her onto her mattress edge.

She lifted the blankets, easing Mira onto her side beneath them. Her head thudded against the pillow. She lightly pulled on Rumi's wrist.

"C'mere." She mumbled. "I gotta keep you warm..I promised."

Before Rumi could protest, her drunken strength kicked in and Rumi found herself fully wrapped in the love of her life's arms..in her bed..under her blanket.

"Uh I..uh." Rumi stuttered. "Mir I don't know if I should stay."

"You don't want to stay with me?" Mira's lip quivered in a manner Rumi had never seen.

"No no I'm sorry I…I really want to stay." Rumi admitted, tucking her face away.

"So stay." Mira noted with finality.

She hugged Rumi flush to her, Mira's knee parting Rumi's own to bring them closer. Rumi tucked herself into the warm chest in front of her. She smelled different tonight, like whiskey and vanilla rather than her usual spiced florals. Different, but still nice.

"You're so pretty Rums." Mira stated randomly.

"I..I think you're really pretty too."

"I like your patterns a lot." Mira mumbled. "I want to touch em."

"You do?" Rumi gripped Mira's waist.

"They remind me of Kintsugi." Mira smiled sleepily against her head, lips brushing her hair. "Like you were all cracked and purple before, but our love fixed you up and now you're shiny..like ..what's it called.."

"Gold?" Rumi chuckled.

"No no…like..Oh!" She half yelled the last part. "An opal."

Rumi didn't even try to resist the blush forming on her cheeks, patterns definitely glowing bright pink under her hoodie.

"I really like opals." Mira continued. "They remind me of the moon…you're pretty like the moon Rumi."

"Miraaa." Rumi groaned, hiding her smile against Mira's sternum.

"What I'm just saying.." Mira laughed sleepily.

"You have no filter right now don't you?" Rumi teased.

"Nope." Mira popped her lips on the p.

"I'm not used to you being so..I don't know open? Not sure what to call this."

"Mhmm." Mira snuggled them somehow closer.

Rumi felt Mira's breathing even out, she rubbed circles on the small of Mira's back. Part of her felt guilty for enjoying this.

The other part was literally riding a euphoric high of cuddling in bed with Mira, just the two of them. Even if Mira was drunk for it. Maybe someday she could have this in full, with a sober Mira and her sweet words. Though her silly giggles as she spoke half slurred words was pretty cute.

Rumi wrapped her arm tight around Mira's waist, fingertips brushing bare skin.

Just for tonight, she felt okay to be selfish and enjoy this for herself.

Mira's head throbbed as consciousness clawed it's way into her. The taste of liquor and bile stung her throat and tongue, she definitely didn't remember throwing up at all. The sun was spraying across the room in beams when she finally cracked an eye open. The light stunned her back into ache and throbbing. She was very, very hungover.

She felt warmth against her chest.

Hair tickled her cheek.

The soft smell of lavender surrounded her.

No.

Surely not?

She glanced down, arms shifting slightly to feel Rumi snuggled up against her. Fast asleep.

"Holy-" she breathed out.

Now how the fuck did this happen? Rumi had her hand up Mira's shirt, resting lightly against her side. Their legs were tangled and their bodies pressed completely together. Mira thinks she may have actually drank herself to death last night.

Her and Rumi haven't spoken in days, let alone warranted an impromptu sleepover just the two of them. Not that she was complaining. She used the most featherlight touches possible to brush Rumi's loose hair out of her face, her long braid cascading in a beautiful curve behind her.

Fuck she was pretty.

She looked so soft when she slept. Rumi was angelic in the morning sun rays. Golden hues always complimented her well. Mira could stay like this all day. She rubbed the length of Rumi's back with her hands, earning a content sigh out of the patterned girl.

Rumi pressed forward against her, shifting Mira onto her back as the lavender haired girl practically climbed onto her chest. She paused a moment, giving Rumi time to change her mind and wake up if she needed. Once Rumi settled down into her, head gently nuzzling into Mira's neck, she resumed her soft back rub. Rumi exhaled and hugged tight to her, eyes fluttering open.

"Hey sleepyhead." Mira had raspy sleep thick in her voice.

"Hi." Rumi shifted. "Are you feeling okay?"

Her patterned hand traced over Mira's collar bone tentatively. God her hands were so soft.

"I have a splitting headache." She grumbled.

"Yeah drinking yourself stupid will do that." Rumi gripped at Mira's shirt.

"I never do that honestly. I don't know what came over me. Really rough night I guess." She rubbed her eyes with one hand, leaving the other on Rumi's waist.

"Please don't do that again." Rumi pleaded, "I was really worried about you."

"I'm really sorry Rumi. You didn't need to deal with me."

"You aren't something to deal with." Rumi retorted. "I wanted you safe."

"I would've been fine." Mira stared off.

"You fell asleep drunk on the balcony Mira." Rumi sat up, blanket falling off her shoulders. "It was cold and could have rained..and your hands."

Mira fiddled with the bandages, unable to look at Rumi.

"I'm sorry." She rolled away. "Thanks for helping me."

The bed shifted behind her and Mira felt her back warm. Arms slipped over her as Rumi spooned her. Her pulse quickened so loudly she swore Rumi had to be able to feel it. The soft breaths tickled the back of her neck and ignited that passionate flame over her heart.

"I came last night to talk." Rumi whispered. "About the Idol Awards."

"Can I ask how we ended up cuddling first?"

"We cuddled on the couch the other day. Why..is this weirder?"

"Not weirder just..you know…in bed and alone." Mira mumbled.

"O-oh..right." Rumi tucked her face into Mira's hair. "You kinda just…invited me to stay and I did."

Silence blanketed over them, still and slightly warm. Not uncomfortable just..charged. Mira spoke up first.

"I'm sorry about yelling at you the other day. You were right..it wasn't fair to be mad at you for hiding your patterns." Mira offered softly. "I'm more hurt by the lying to my face and working with Jinu than I'll ever be mad about you having patterns."

Mira failed to mention how violently jealous it made her to see them side by side.

"I didn't mean for it to happen." Rumi rubbed her fingers over Mira's stomach anxiously. "Jinu found out at the bathhouse. He cut my sleeve and saw. So when he reached out to talk.. curiosity got the better of me."

"Did you.. really have feelings for him?" Mira thought back to the RuJinu posts.

"I don't really have words for what I felt." Rumi pondered. "I guess I was just relieved to have someone to talk about my patterns with? I wanted us to save each other. I guess in a way, we did."

Mira relaxed her shoulders, causing Rumi to cuddle closer. Mira decided to be brave and wrapped her hands around Rumi's.

"Can you forgive me?" Rumi whispered. "At least for that."

She was still so angry, so hurt. All it had done for her was isolate her. Maybe, just this once, for Rumi she could try to forgive and forget. As best she could.

"Yes." Mira replied after a long pause.

"Thank you Mir." Rumi squeezed her.

"I hate what he did to you with Takedown." Mira hissed out. "Regardless of him saving you from Gwi-Ma..if he was still here I'd have beaten the hell out of him."

"Speaking of.." she flipped their hands so hers were on top. "Can I see these?"

"I…I guess." Mira sighed.

They sat up together, Rumi gently pulling Mira's hands over her lap. Her fingers unraveled the bandage with the care of someone handling an injured bird. She kept her lip firmly in her teeth as she revealed the ghastly wounds. She froze inspecting them.

"Oh Mira.." she breathed out shakily.

"I know."

"Doesn't it hurt?"

"Terribly."

She touched around the reddened skin, causing Mira to wince.

"Sorry!" Rumi pulled her thumb away from the bruised knuckles.

"It's okay. I probably deserve it after how I've been behaving."

"Hey no. I don't like when you talk like that." Rumi pouted.

"Sorry." Mira didn't meet her eyes.

"Are we…okay?" Rumi breathed out softly.

"Can you promise no more lying?"

"I promise." Rumi held Mira's hand to herself.

"Then yeah.. we're okay I think." Mira gave a soft smile.

Mira couldn't resist the way her heart swelled as Rumi tackled into her, arms tight around her neck. Mira laughed warmly, hugging her back as she practically sat in the taller girl's lap.

"I missed you so much." Rumi muttered into her ear.

"I missed you too."

They held each other for quite a while before either decided to let up. Rumi took her battered hand in her own again.

"Can I help with this?"

"Yeah that's fine."

Mira sat while Rumi grabbed all the supplies from the bathroom. Despite her doing the exact same thing that Mira did last night, it hurts far less when Rumi held her aching hands through it. Mira's heart leapt up into her throat as Rumi lifted her hands to her lips and pressed a soft kiss into each once she finished.

"There." She blushed. "All better."

Mira softened and locked eyes with Rumi, her aureate brown eyes were glimmering with something Mira couldn't find the bravery to name out loud.

The both jolted as they felt a ripple over the new Honmoon.

"Was that?" Rumi climbed off the bed, running to the balcony to look out.

The Honmoon cascaded over the horizon in swirling multi-colored hues, but Rumi pin pointed the distinct magenta tear in the distance.

"Demons." She muttered.

"Let's go." Mira put her hand on Rumi's shoulder, turning her towards the door.

They ran out of Mira's room right as Zoey left her own, their younger member paused and raised a brow at Rumi.

"Not now." Rumi shoved Zoey along.

They crossed rooftops and wires with ease, practically gliding along the shingles together. Zoey was the first to spot the cluster, scavenging a group of homeless people in an alley. She sprang into action, launching Shin-kal rapidly.

"I count 15 small guys and 5 medium." Zoey called back.

Mira leapt down from above, Gok-do pointed downward as she rode the blade down into a group. A wave of Honmoon threads burst from around her as her blade struck the ground. Her bandaged hand gripped the handle as she spun with a kick around it, before pulling it up and twirling it forward into a medium size demon.

Rumi staggered down, kicking demons aside as she summoned her sword. The new weight was too unfamiliar, dragging her down to the ground off balance.

"Shit." She sputtered, lifting it with two hands instead of one now.

A medium demon spared no time crawling at her, smashing into her ribcage with a clawed fist. She stumbled, swinging the new blade downward with a slam. Within seconds, the familiar pole-arm blade shot past her, taking out the demon.

She turned to thank Mira.

"I knew it was too good to be true" echoed out.

Rumi shrieked and stumbled backwards, the flash of Mira in her Golden outfit overtook her vision. Mira's weapon pointed at her.

She fell backwards, wincing at any touch towards her. The Gok-do flickered as Mira's horrified expression came into view. She stared at Rumi, eyes deeply pained.

Her weapon vanished in smoke.

Rumi crawled away, her heart pounded with pure adrenaline. She clawed at her chest, breathe ragged as it left her.

Zoey looked over, flipping over the larger demon with a swift slice of her knives. She ran over.

"What the fuck is going on?" She called.

Mira moved to draw her weapon back.

Nothing appeared.

"What-" she gasped, demons sprinting towards her. "Oh fuck."

Mira punched a small demon away, sending searing pain through her knuckles. Her teeth grated together as she sucked in air for another strike. Each punch and elbow swing stung and rattled her bones fiercely. Zoey skidded in, throwing blades to finish them off.

"What are you doing Mira?" She shouted. "Summon your weapon!"

"I-I can't!" Mira cried out, genuine fear in her voice.

A demon lunged, latching onto her shoulders. She gripped behind her, throwing it forward as it tore her shirt open.

"Mira!" Rumi yelled frantically, running towards her.

She gripped the heavy sword, bringing it down hard in front of Mira to destroy the demon that had clung to her. Rumi ran to Mira, gripping her.

"M-Mira I'm so sorry are you okay?" Rumi ran her hands over her, checking for injury.

"I'm fine Ru, what about you?" She held her close.

"Fine too." Her impulse spat out.

She let Mira fawn over her, checking her for cuts and scrapes. Her fingers gently pressed at her painful spot on her ribs, before she brought Rumi into a desperate hug.

"I'm so sorry Rumi I wasn't thinking when I came over I-"

"No no Mira please it's okay." She clung to her. "Neither of us knew that would happen."

Rumi winced with each squeeze. Zoey tackled them both, sending deep ache through her.

"What happened out there? You two are never out of sync." Zoey checked them both.

"Its my fault." Mira uttered.

"Mira no-" Rumi cut in.

"Yes. It is." She was harsher in her cut off this time. "You saw me with my weapon pointed towards you and froze. We all know why."

They all stood quiet.

"Mira you..you can't summon your weapon?" Zoey inquired softly.

She stretched out her arm, focusing into the Honmoon threads to draw it out. It flickered in her hands a moment before fading away completely.

"Fuck." She hissed.

"But..why?" Rumi moved closer.

"I don't know." Mira gripped the air.

"Let's get out of here." Zoey tugged Mira.

Rumi lifted her shirt up in the mirror, the deep burgundy stain on her skin forming. Her heart tumbled in her chest.

She lied.

She lied.

She lied.

Mira was going to know.

She was going to hate her again.

Rumi sniffled as the tears started. She tugged the shirt down. Her eyes burned and ached to close, but she knew she wouldn't sleep.

She wanted Mira next to her again.

Needed it.

Rumi doesn't even remember going to her room before she was knocking. Mira opened the door, wearing her ridiculously cute polar bear sweater and shorts that always made Rumi want to touch her legs. Rumi clung to herself, tears streaming.

"Hey Rumi what's wrong?" Mira immediately pulled her in, closing the door behind her.

"I'm sorry." Rumi sobbed. "Please don't be mad I didn't mean to."

"Mean to what?" Mira came closer, reaching for her.

"I lied." She started to hyperventilate. "I-I-I lied."

"Hey hey shh." Mira soothed her. "Let's sit."

They sat on Mira's soft bed, she felt a blanket be draped around her. Mira rubbed her back and leaned their heads close.

"Breathe Ru." She cooed. "I'm here it's okay."

"But..but..I…b-broke my p-p-promise." She practically hiccupped through the words as she sucked air in.

"Tell me what." Mira held her face tenderly, far too tenderly. "And tell me why. That's it."

Rumi slowly lifted up her shirt, showing Mira the ugly bruise. She bent down, softly touching the mark so sweetly it didn't even hurt. Why didn't it hurt?

"Are you saying you lied about not being hurt? Is that it?" Mira's voice was so kind and warm.

"Y-yeah." Rumi sniffled. "I'm sorry."

"Can you tell me why?" She wiped her eyes for her. Too carefully.

"I guess i-impulse?" Rumi sniffled, leaning into the soft touches. "I always did s-so I did it without t-thinking again."

How did Mira always calm her so quickly? Her eyes were soft. She didn't look angry. Not at all.

"You always hid your injuries?" She sounded sad. Rumi hated it.

"Yeah…patterns." Rumi shrugged.

"I see." Mira brought her in close. "Are you okay to not do that anymore? Do you feel comfortable telling me?"

"Yes." Rumi cuddled into her.

"You'll let me take care of you? Like you did for me?" She held the back of Rumi's head, fingers tangled in pretty, mauve hair.

"Please." Rumi gripped onto her.

"I will." Mira pressed her cheek to Rumi's forehead. "I promise."

Rumi buried her head in soft skin and silky hair. She exhaled against the gentleness and comfort.

"Let me go get you an ice pack." Mira stood. "You can stay here as long as you want."

Forever?

"Thank you." Rumi elected to say instead.

Mira brushed her thumb over Rumi's jaw as she stood, sending fluttering into her stomach. Rumi watched her walk out and she was suddenly alone in Mira's room.

She looked around, taking everything in. Mira's grey and black bedding, her walls plastered in vinyls and professional photos of Huntrix. Over by her vanity was more private photos. Rumi rose to see them. Mira's make up was perfectly arranged in its display, but living the mirror corners were only pictures of Zoey and Rumi.

Actually a lot of Rumi. Candids.

Rumi laughing while eating ice cream.

Her cuddled up with a book on the couch.

Her sitting on her phone in the dressing room.

All these soft moments that Rumi never thought mattered, printed out and taped where Mira goes every day.

To the left was probably every single hand written note she or Zoey had ever written her.

On the right along the wall was a perfectly alphabetized book shelf.

A record player.

A sewing machine.

Incense and perfumes tucked on a shelf.

A singular purple tiger plushie Zoey had got her.

All the things she's never let herself pay attention to, but they were all so deeply entangled in Mira's being.

The soft, warm smell of cinnamon and coffee wafted in Mira's space. Her smell always reminded Rumi of Autumn. Warm and spiced, with a crisp refreshing sweetness hidden.

"Alrighty here we go-" Mira paused, looking over Rumi in her room. "Uh.. looking for something?"

"Oh no just looking at your pictures and stuff." Rumi pointed.

"I see." Mira sounded off. "I brought the ice pack."

"Thank you." Rumi took the cold bundle and held it to her aching side. She scanned over the bookshelf.

"Do you have a favorite?" Rumi pointed.

Mira hesitated a moment, pulling out a small blue book that looked well loved and annotated. She held it out to Rumi.

"This is how you lose the time war?" Rumi read out.

"Yeah. Its letters between two women on opposite sides of a time travel war."

Rumi tucked the ice pack under her arm, flipping open the small book. There were red and blue highlighter marks all throughout it, alternating chapters. Mira had scribed her own notes and poems along the edges in her pretty handwriting. The book itself was romantic prose, metaphorical, and oh so very Mira. Rumi found her fingers glancing over each written thought.

"Can I read it?" Rumi turned towards her.

"Maybe I'll get you a copy that I haven't ruined with all my nonsense so you can form your own opinion of it." Mira chuckled weakly.

"Well first of all, not ruined. I would happily enjoy this with your thoughts for company." Rumi pouted. "And second I am okay with my own copy, but not if you belittle yourself."

"You'd.. really want to read this copy?" Mira scanned her face.

"I'd love to. If that's okay?" Rumi touched the book softly.

"Yeah okay..I uh…I hope you like it." Mira blushed a faint rose hue.

"I'm sure I will." Rumi smiled. "You have always had excellent taste."

A beat rested between them a moment. Rumi looked over all the other books, asking questions about them and complimenting covers. Mira followed along, answering every one with warmth and doting attention.

"Um.." Rumi fiddled with her fingers.

"Yes?" Mira asked fondly.

"Could I.." Rumi took a deep breath. "Could I stay here again? Tonight I mean..to sleep?"

"Of course Rumi." Mira rested her hand on the small of her back.

Rumi let out a relieved sigh and turned, snuggling into Mira's arms. "Thank you." She mumbled into her chest.

"It's no problem." Mira chuckled. "I uh..I like having you over."

Rumi smiled, sighing into Mira's pounding heart. She liked how Mira felt wrapped around her, so tall and enveloping.

Another soft knock at the door made them both turn as Zoey's head popped in.

"Heyyy." She grinned, scanning over the two of them hugging. "Glad to see you've made up."

"Yep." Mira muttered.

"So uh…are we going to talk about the whole Mira not having a weapon thing?" Zoey walked over to them.

"I'm not sure what to even start with there." Rumi looked up to Mira.

"Hey wait what happened there?" Zoey pointed at Rumi's side where the ice pack was pressed.

"Oh uh, just a sore bruise is all." Rumi rattled off.

"I thought you said you were okay earlier?" Zoey raised a brow, an edge tucked into her sweet voice.

"I thought I was.. adrenaline must have made me not realize." Rumi wouldn't meet her gaze.

"Okay.." Zoey drawled out. "Well regardless, should we call Celine about you Mira?"

Rumi tensed hard in Mira's arms, her patterns flaring magenta quickly.

Mira noticed. Of course she did it wasn't a subtle reaction. Her eyes latched onto Rumi's faster than she could hide her face.

"Yeah..maybe we should.." Mira looked her over hard, searching for a reason. "I'll see how I am in the morning."

"You sure?" Zoey placed her hand on Mira's bicep.

"Positive." Her eyes didn't leave Rumi.

"If you're sure." Zoey rubbed her arm. "Well goodnight you two."

They opened their hug, dragging Zoey in. The elicited giggles that followed warmed them all, melting the tension away briefly. Once Zoey had been thoroughly squeezed, they freed her to return to her room. As soon as the door closed, Mira turned.

"So what the fuck was that reaction for?" Mira inquired carefully.

"Its..it's nothing we're just…not on the best terms right now." Rumi stuttered.

"Why?"

"Disagreement." Rumi replied sternly.

"That's it?"

"That's it." Rumi didn't budge.

"You're sure you don't want to talk about it?"

"I'm sure."

Mira let out a deep breath, moving to get ready in the bathroom.

"Can I still stay?" Rumi felt her voice crack.

"Yes Rumi." Mira nodded. "Of course you can still stay."

"I'm gonna go brush my teeth and stuff." Rumi clutched the book to her chest. "Thanks for letting me borrow this."

"Always." Mira cooed.

Rumi had left a moment ago, leaving Mira clutching her bathroom counter.

She tensed so badly…her patterns flared. What possibly could have incited such a strong reaction. Disagreement her ass.

Her mind fought between fury and the understanding softness she so desperately wanted to have. Had Rumi lied again? Or was she just exercising her right to privacy. Rumi was trying so very hard to be close again. Mira liked being close and not fighting, even if it meant swallowing her anger.

Rumi deserved that much.

Mira heard the door open and close. When she came out Rumi had her hair down, adorable pajama pants on, and one of her hoodies. She looked so..soft. Vulnerable.

Mira climbed into bed, sitting up slightly. Rumi stood frozen.

"I don't bite hard." Mira teased.

Rumi went beet red at the foot of the bed before crawling over to Mira, nestling herself into her arms. It felt as simple as breathing to relax into her warmth. Slender fingers began to twirl long hair and scratch at Rumi's scalp, earning a contented noise from the half demon.

Then a vibrating sensation.

Deep from Rumi's chest as she settled.

"Are you..purring?" Mira's voice pitched up in adoration.

"Oh um..a-am I?" Rumi stammered.

"Yeah you are." Mira laughed. "Its cute."

She dragged her nails over Rumi's scalp and nape, earning another round of the soft purrs and a tiny whimper. That shot a bloom of heat in her core she wasn't prepared for.

"I can't help it." Rumi whined. "That feels really good."

"I could make you feel so fucking good right now."

"I-I'm glad." Mira forced out instead. "Except when we're sparring and you're being a brat." Mira mocked.

"Hmm I don't know, you seem to take it easy on me compared to when you practice with Celine." Rumi teased, breath tickling her neck.

"Yeah cause Celine might actually kill me if I don't." Mira snorted. "I have to defend myself."

"I like your laugh." Rumi whispered.

Mira froze, processing what Rumi just said. Her laugh? Her weird snorting laugh?

"You do?" Her voice barely a whisper.

"Yeah?" Rumi giggled. "It's really cute."

"It is?" Mira blinked.

"Yes?" Rumi looked up at her, blushing as their noses brushed. "Do you not think it's cute?"

"I got told it was unflattering and weird." Mira replied flatly. "Pretty much constantly in high school and middle school."

"Well they're dumb. I think it's adorable." Rumi affirmed.

"I think you're adorable." Mira blurted back without thinking.

Rumi tensed now, looking over Mira's face for any sign of a lie it seemed. Mira let her eyes drift downward to that perfect, pretty mouth inches from her own. She imagined how soft those lips are, hints of two new fangs poking. She wouldn't be opposed to letting Rumi use those on her either.

"You think I'm adorable?" Rumi breathed out, minty still from her toothpaste.

"Incredibly so." Mira exhaled softly.

Rumi bit her lip. For fucks sake Mira was going to die in this bed. She was practically throbbing now, fighting off the urge to just make out with Rumi till her lips were bruised and she couldn't breathe.

"Can I kiss you?" Rumi whispered.

"What?" Mira blinked, she must be dreaming.

"I..I asked if I could…could I kiss you?" Rumi stuttered. "I've never done it before, but I..I want to."

Mira leaned down, pausing just before their mouths met. Her hands tangled in Rumi's hair pulled back to caress her cheek, thumb brushing over her bottom lip.

Mira kissed her as softly as a psalm in a chapel.

It sent lightning through her, electric and energizing. Rumi moaned softly, melting into the kiss as their lips brushed. Rumi gripped the collar of Mira's shirt, her warm mouth rolling against her own.

She was really Rumi's first kiss.

Her heart beat so hard it was nearly out of its cage in her chest, desperate to claw to Rumi.

She was in bed.. languidly kissing Rumi..right now..

This was happening.

Fuck her for feeling angry all this time, this was worth it. She had to be better. Had to choke down the rage to keep this.

She didn't deserve to have this and be angry.

Rumi sighed again, chasing her lips to kiss her more.

More, more, more.

"I'm yours." Her heart screamed.

"Nobody else will touch me again."

"I'm yours. I'm yours. I'm yours."

"You are my everything. I will do anything for you. Rumi. My Rumi. Please belong to me too."

Mira tugged at Rumi's waist, pulling her in tighter. She has no idea how long they've been kissing here, just lips. No tongue yet.

Unfortunately she needed to breath.

So she broke them apart with a soft, wet sound as their lips caught.

"W-wow." Rumi was such a scarlet shade she looked feverish.

"Good first kiss?" Mira coughed out as suave as she could manage.

"I..I could never have imagined..that's what it feels like." She panted. "That was…wow."

"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Mira swallowed her anxiety, nuzzling their noses together.

"That tickles." Rumi giggled, pressing in close again.

"Can I..have more?" She asked shyly.

Mira didn't hesitate this time and came in ready. Their lips danced off each other again, warm and wet and sweet. Was it too much to try for tongue?

Fuck it.

Mira as gently as possible took Rumi's bottom lip in her teeth, dragging the tip of her tongue across it. Rumi moaned in response, clearly receptive. Mira pressed a bit further, teasing her tongue between her lips. Rumi parted them ever so slightly, unsure of what to do if she had to guess.

"Is this okay?" Mira whispered.

"Yes please more." Rumi whined.

Mira returned and fully slipped the smallest amount of tongue into Rumi's mouth. She swiped lightly until Rumi's tongue found her own and white hot heat pooled between them. The kiss deepened and mouths opened more. Rumi was fully moaning with each pass of their tongues over each other, quiet in the back of her throat. Mira was being driven wild.

Rumi tasted like mint and tea, the hint of honey left on her tongue. She tasted like everything Mira has ever wanted and ever will want. Her hand gripped the nape of Rumi's neck, holding her tight to her. Rumi's hands had wandered down to her waist, holding on like she was afraid Mira would disappear. Rumi pulled away first this time, panting and flushed.

"I-I think I need a break." She chuckled.

"Too much?" Mira tested.

"No no just..really really good." Rumi nuzzled into her neck. "I feel…flustered though."

"Do you..like that?" Mira rubbed her shoulders as they cuddled.

"I do." Rumi grinned against her. "I think I just..need some time before I..act on it…if that's okay?"

"Its so okay." Mira said rapidly. "So very okay."

"Okay good." Rumi sighed. "But..I would like to kiss more..when you're up for it."

"Literally any time Rumi I'm serious." Mira slipped out.

"Zoey is right, you are a simp." Rumi giggled.

"What?" Mira scowled playfully. "Zoey told you?"

"Kind of." Rumi shrugged sheepishly. "I was telling her how I felt and she may have hinted that you liked me too."

"Unbelievable." Mira shook her head.

"Thank you." Rumi looked up. "For this."

"I should be thanking you."

"Why?" Rumi chuckled. "I can't be a good kisser compared to all the people you've mentioned you have been with before."

"You were the only one that mattered." Mira cupped her cheek.

Rumi went pink again. Her eyes widened and Mira found their lips together again, like that's where they belong. Rumi was hungrier this time, more forward in her movement. Her tongue slipped between Mira's lips and they traded off the lead. All warmth and tenderness and affection.

"I feel like I'm being spoiled by your good kissing." Rumi laughed them apart. "I'm guessing you're a little above average?"

"Oh I'm well above average tiger." Mira let some confidence slip in.

Rumi actually squeaked deep in her throat. So confidence was a positive, noted. The striped girl snuggled hard into her sternum, fully burying her face and pretty lips away. Mira hugged her close, pulling the blanket around them. Rumi had fully melted into her tonight.

"I like sleeping here." Rumi muffled into her.

"I like you sleeping here too." Mira chuckled low.

"Your blankets are so soft and you smell so nice." Rumi gripped her sleep shirt in her hands against her back.

"You smell good too." Mira smiled. "Like lavender and tea leaves."

"You make my face hurt from smiling."

"You make me feel safe."

Their confessions hung in the air, bright and gentle as fireflies in the dark. They embraced each other tight. Mira let one hand tease the hem of Rumi's sweater, brushing along bare skin. Her other cradled Rumi's head under her chin with the amount of precious care she felt.

There was no anger tonight.

Just her aching heart soothed for once, for the first time truly.

Tonight she would sleep with no nightmares.

Chapter Text

"Guys!" Zoey banged on Mira's door. "Bobby's here!"

Mira lurched upward, hands dragging down her face. Rumi was curled up with her back to her still.

"Be right out!" She called back.

She leaned over, shaking Rumi lightly.

"Wake up sleepyhead."

Rumi only groaned, grabbing Mira's wrist and tugging her back down into spooning her again. She wiggled backwards, rubbing that perfect ass a little too close to home plate for Mira to stay composed.

"Rumi." Mira coughed out. "Bobby is here."

"Mmm." Rumi groaned, pulling Mira tighter to her back. "Bobby isn't warm cuddles."

"If you get up with me I'll make you whatever breakfast you want." Mira offered.

"Anything?" Rumi opened her eyes finally.

"What are you craving tiger?"

"Blueberry pancakes."

"I can do that." Mira chuckled.

Rumi rolled over, tucking her face into Mira's chest. She inhaled deep, working up the energy to sit up fully. Mira pulled her upright with her, arms still tucked around her.

"Go get dressed." Mira playfully shoved her.

"Ugh fine." Rumi crawled out from under the covers.

Mira watched her walk out, turning the corner and shutting the door behind her.

The mask faded immediately.

The last few nights Rumi had spent every night in her bed, wrapped up in Mira's arms. She claimed she was fine, that she just liked the feeling and the warmth.

Mira had heard her shuddered breathing.

The way she trembled late at night.

Nightmares she claimed didn't exist.

Every night she forced away the negative heat. Intent on simply enjoying Rumi's company for the first time. Teenage Mira would pass out if she was told they had kissed and cuddled. Repeatedly. But the gnawing emotions kept trying to claw their way up her throat like bile.

She hadn't been able to summon her weapon still. Felt empty without it. Without the Honmoon threads tangling in her fingers.

She swallowed the fear down. Tugging a dark green knit cardigan on over her tank top. Time to see Bobby.

"Morning girls!" He beamed at Rumi and Mira as they joined the two at the counter. "I brought coffee. Everyone's favorites."

He slid a iced black coffee over to Mira

"Black cold brew with brown sugar syrup for Mira. Peppermint tea with honey for Rumi. And a caramel macchiato for Zoey." He rattled off.

"Thanks Bobby!" They all said in unison.

"So I know you're all on break for Huntrix right now, but some solo gigs have been offered that I figured I'd bring up." He opened a folder, passing out contracts.

"Zoey you got requested to do a main feature with Sub Urban on their new single 'Freak'."

"Did they send a demo?" She leaned over.

"Yep emailing it now." He nodded. "Rumi you were offered a cameo in a new fantasy K-Drama. Looks like filming would only be a few hours next week."

"That sounds good." Rumi smiled.

"And last, but certainly not least Mira." Bobby flipped his pages. "Calvin Klein commercial for a new product called 'girlfriend boxers' that they picked you out for."

"They send pics?" Mira sipped her drink.

"Pics and a product sample." He pulled out a tamper proof bag with their logo on it. "They said you'll be in varying degrees of undress from just undergarments to full dress."

"Sounds good, let me see what we're working with."

She tore open the bag, pulling out a pair of lean cut boxer shorts. The crotch was smooth and tight unlike men's cuts. The fabric was incredibly soft and stretchy.

"Okay yeah these are fire I'm down." She held up the fitted sports bra to pair with it.

She looked past them to see Zoey humming out lyrics from the packet.

Rumi's eyes were glued to Mira, her face crimson. Another reason to do this ad. She swallowed hard, thumb rubbing against her cup of tea. Mira smirked at her, causing her to quickly immerse herself in the script she was given.

"How has the break been anyway?" Bobby asked sweetly.

"Good." Zoey grinned. "Watching lots and eating even more."

"And what happened here?" He knit his brow and pointed to Mira's hands.

"Oh um..burned them cooking." Mira stammered. "I'm okay though, Rumi's been taking care of me."

Rumi grinned, hiding her mouth behind the papers as her aureate brown eyes squinted in glee. Mira might explode if she was any cuter.

"Well let me know if you need me to have any doctors over to check the healing. Our visual needs her hands." He joked.

"Will do Bobby." Mira saluted.

They all chuckled. Bobby offered to order them food, but Mira held up her hands.

"I already promised that pancakes would be made."

"Sounds great! I'll leave you too it. Call if you need anything else and I will set up those solo gigs today." He waved from the elevator.

"So pancakes huh?" Zoey raised her brows.

"Only way to wake Rumi up." Mira accused. "She sleeps like a corpse otherwise."

"Hey!" Rumi tossed a ball of paper at Mira.

Mira settled into a familiar routine of bowls and spoons mixing batter. Cooking was therapeutic for her. One of the few things that she genuinely felt calmed by. She watched the bubbled form on top of the circles of batter, waiting until they fully covered the top before flipping to a perfect golden brown.

"Those smell amazing." Rumi came up behind her.

"Yeah good call I'm actually really craving pancakes now that I see them." Mira chuckled. "Could you stir the compote on the stove for me?"

Rumi moved and grabbed the spoon, carefully scrapping the bottom of the pot. The syrupy sweet scent filtered into Rumi's nose.

"This smells so good. What is it?" Rumi leaned down, inspecting the deep purple sauce.

"Sugar and water reduced to a syrup, then I added blueberries, lemon zest, and cinnamon and slow cooked it into sauce."

"We should get you on a cooking show with your skills."

"Awe what's wrong, don't want to see me half naked all over Seoul in a Calvin Klein ad?" Mira teased.

"W-well I didn't say…I don't.. whatever furthers your career I mean-" Rumi rambled off, cheeks flushed a soft pink.

"Cute." Mira nudged her.

Mira wanted to stay in this moment. As if everything was normal and there were never any lies or hurt just…infatuation.

"Okay y'all this song is actually kinda banger!" Zoey yelled over the music only she could hear in her headphones. "Different from anything I usually do, but sick!"

"That's good to hear." Mira pulled one side of the headphones up, letting them snap back down.

"Oh right!" She tugged the headphones all the way down. "Is your weapon back yet Mira?"

She felt herself stiffen before she could suppress it. Rumi looked over at her, concern knit into her brow.

"Um..no..not yet." She admitted quietly.

"So…can we call Celine about it yet?" Zoey's shoulders hiked up.

At the mere mention of her name, Rumi flinched. Something big happened, but what. Mira decided to test the waters.

"Yeah I'll.. I'll call her today." Her eyes glanced to see the reaction.

Rumi whipped her head at Mira, as if offended she would even consider it. There was pleading in her eyes. Mira searched those golden pools for anything at all as a clue.

"But first, let's have pancakes and hang out yeah?" Mira changed the subject, eyes still locked with Rumi's.

Her patterns, though mostly hidden beneath a hoodie, still had a magenta tinge of glow crawling up her neck. The flow died down as Mira nodded to her, a minor assurance.

She relaxed and offered a small grin, one that barely hinted at her dimples. Mira loaded up a plate of pancakes and handed it to her. The same was done for Zoey and then herself. As Rumi ate she seemed to grow happier, the faint sheen of opalescent light shining through.

"That was so freaking good Mir." Zoey belched.

"Zoey!" Rumi giggled, shoving her lightly. "Say excuse me."

"I never excuse greatness." She leaned back.

"This is why we don't take you anywhere." Mira poked her side.

"Not true at all!" She giggled, shuffling away from the touch. "You took me to the aquarium for my birthday."

"Yeah and you got into an argument with the handler about proper turtle diet." Rumi covered her mouth wheezing.

"Okay, but he was like, totally a dick about it!" Zoey cackled.

Mira laughed low, watching Rumi unwind. After a bit more chatter, Zoey excused herself down to their studio to do a trial run of the song she was featuring on. Mira locked eyes with Rumi, inhaling deep before speaking.

"Rumi. I can tell you don't want me to see Celine." Her body tensed again. "Can you at least explain to me why? I'm more than happy to try other things, but I need to know why I'm doing everything except the obvious choice."

"I told you we had..a falling out." She mumbled.

"You said a disagreement before." Mira raised a brow. "That's a bit different than falling out."

"We just haven't..made up is all. Its awkward between us right now."

"Why does that affect me and Celine? Why couldn't I just see her alone?"

"I.." Rumi seemed to not have an answer.

Mira waited, giving her time to piece her words together. Her hands clinched beneath the counter, careful not to alert Rumi to her rising frustration just tingling under her skin.

"I'm scared she'll tell you something about me..that we discussed privately. And you'll..look at me differently. Like I'm…fragile." Rumi's voice pitched up the longer she spoke, cracking on her final word.

Mira stood, moving around to Rumi's chair. She pulled her to lean her head against her stomach, holding her lightly.

"I don't see you that way Rumi. I don't think I could. You've been tough through so much..it's hard not to think of you as invincible." Mira brushed her hair with her fingers.

Rumi hugged her waist, keeping her close.

"Promise?" She whispered.

"I promise." Mira nodded. "If Celine says anything, I will talk to you about it first okay?"

"Okay." Rumi hide her face in Mira's abdomen, tucked between the flaps of her cardigan.

"Thank you. For being honest with me Rumi. I know its new to not hide."

That deep blue glow peaked out the back of her neck, subtle, but enough to tell Mira that not everything was out in the open.

Just breathe. Give her time. She's ingrained to be secretive. Mira kept repeating to herself.

Give her time.

Let her breathe.

She'll choose truth.

Please chose truth.

Please.

The line rang several seconds before it clicked, the familiar soft voice of Celine wafting through.

"Mira?" She called out nervously. "Is everything okay did something happen with Rumi?"

What would have happened with Rumi? Celine never questioned when her or Zoey called before. Always just polite formality before whatever topics needed discussed.

"Rumi's fine just..I have a problem and I'm not sure how to fix it."

"What is it dear?"

"I uh.. can't summon my weapon right now."

There was a pause, she could feel the weight behind the response coming. Celine knew exactly what was wrong with her.

"Can you come to Jeju Island? Stay a few days?" Celine replied cautiously.

"Uh yeah.. I can. When?" Mira inquired.

"As soon as possible."

"Okay. I'll have Bobby book me a flight."

"Will..will Rumi be joining you?" Celine's voice wavered slightly.

"I'll ask her. She has a show to cameo in, but maybe she's free before." Mira already knew the answer.

"Okay. I'll make up the bed in your room."

"Thanks Celine."

The quiet in her room was thick and swirling like smoke. Her fingers drummed against the desk. Celine seemed desperate to connect with Rumi and fix..whatever happened. Maybe Mira could convinced her.

Rumi paced in her room. Celine was on the phone a room over. They hadn't spoke since..since she-

"DO IT!" Echoed out in her memory. The feeling of her sword in her hand.

She winced, hugging herself, remembering that dark place she never dared speak about. The one with silence so loud and so lonely that she would lock herself way just to keep anyone from seeing it.

Until the idol awards.

When she lost everything.

Her Panic Room.

Years ago..before Huntrix was built..

Celine was out there again. At her mother's grave. It had become a nightly ritual now. Rumi cleared the dishes and washed them, putting away the ones she could reach.

Her shirt had gotten all wet from the sink.

She padded down the hallway to her bedroom, small and lightly decorated with plants and bears, her own small book nook Celine had built her. She pulled the soggy shirt over her head, catch a glimpse of the patterns.

"Demons are evil creatures, we hunt them down and send them back where they belong." Celine's voice echoes in her ears.

"Everything that has patterns?"

"Cover those up."

Rumi knew since the day she was old enough to retain memory that she was a mistake. A hunter with patterns. Something that shouldn't exist. The reason her mother was gone.

She was a monster.

And hunters kill monsters.

Celine always told her she was a hunter..

She needed to be rid of these patterns. Then she'd be perfect. Be worthy. Celine could finally be happy and not so sad all the time. They hadn't yet found the other hunters needed to seal the golden Honmoon. So Rumi had to try other methods.

The first time was the gentlest.

She sat in her room, make up all set out, trying to cover up the patterns as best she could. Blending purple into skin tone was easier said than done.

"That's unrealistic to do every day Rumi." Celine has accosted her. "Just wear clothes that cover them as needed."

The second time stung.

Rumi had drawn a bath with steel wool in hand, scrubbing at her skin until the water tinged pink and red swirls. She ripped through raw layers of skin, the flesh growing red and torn.

The marks were untouched, skin took a few hours to heal over with her rapid regeneration.

The third time burned.

She filled the gas tank for the lawn equipment with Celine. When she switched between bottles, her arm slipped, getting soaked in gasoline.

She meant to wash it off.

She really was going to.

But then Celine lit incense and the spark came to her. She ignited the patterns on her arm.

It was agony. The way the flames licked at her flesh and filled the house with a charred flesh scent. The patterns remained.

Celine started hiding the lighters and matches.

The eighth time she used a knife.

Trying to carve away the ugly, jagged marks.

Celine took her to the hospital.

Rumi had to stay in an uncomfortable facility for a while. The food was bland and there were people with marks similar to her own. Except theirs didn't heal over like new a day later. A nice man asked her lots of questions about herself.

The fifteenth time she woke up crying.. because if the marks couldn't go, she had to.

The cliff had been jagged at the bottom.

Her back screamed in agony when she moved.

She still hears her bones snapping back together.

This time would work..it had to.

It didn't.

Again.

Again…

She's exhausted.

Make it stop.

Please…

Stop…

"Rumi?" Celine called out. "I'm back with the girls. Clean up and come down."

Finally a real chance. She'd failed enough. Finally the real training begins. She can finally be worth something. Finally be rid of her patterns and be free. Truly free. No more pain.

What she wasn't expecting was the prettiest, most intense girl she had ever seen.

Zoey was bouncy, energetic, fun. She made Rumi laugh and feel like sunshine was a person.

But Mira..

Oh Mira was like a roiling storm. Thunderous and intense and consuming. Rumi liked the pink streaks that framed her face. She should dye all of it that color.

Much like a hurricane, Rumi eventually found the eye of the storm.

Oh how tender Mira could be.

Rumi jolted from the knock at her door. Derpy lifted his head from his spot on the floor. She ushered him and Sussie out onto the balcony.

"Coming one sec!" She yelled over her shoulder.

She threw the curtains closed. Adjusting her sleeves down on impulse before opening the door.

"Hey." Mira smiled softly.

Rumi grabbed her hand, pulling her in. Once the door was closed behind them, she looked up to Mira.

"Can I?" Her fingers brushed Mira's mouth.

Mira nodded, leaning down and taking her waist in her hands. Rumi could taste coffee and berries on her lips. Mira's lips were so very soft. Softer than she ever imagined. Her hands found their way to Mira's neck, holding them close together.

She had realized a few things about kissing she liked. Whether they were specific to Mira or not she didn't know.

She liked when it started tender and soft.

She liked the small passes of tongue. How warm they made her body feel.

This she knew was specific, but she liked the low moans that left Mira when they kissed. The way Mira always melted into her and let out a deep breath as if she'd been holding it her whole life until her lips found Rumi's.

She knew they were small gestures, stolen moments alone between them.

But oh how she longed for it to be more.

Rumi wanted to deserve this.

Deserving someone so wonderful and powerful and absolutely doting.

She forced herself to pull away, even if her heart begged her to take those few steps backwards to her bed with Mira on top of her.

"I am still not used to this." Mira chuckled softly, brushing her knuckles over Rumi's cheek. She lingers on the patterns now when she touches Rumi.

"The patterns?" Rumi mumbled.

"No you goof." Mira poked her cheek. "Kissing you just like, casually."

"Do the patterns bother you though?"

"No they don't." Mira traced one down her jaw. "They're quite pretty."

Rumi remembered with heated cheeks how Mira had compared her to an opal in her drunken state. It was a comfort to hear she liked them sober too.

"I didn't expect them to react to touch so much."

"They what?" Rumi blinked.

Mira huffed out a laugh, rolling Rumi's sleeve up. She trailed her fingertip light as a feather along a jagged mark down her forearm. A soft, iridescent glow followed her touch, just a breath behind. Rumi felt her brows lift as she watched Mira's hand move along her.

"See? Pretty." Mira smiled warmly, eyes crinkling slightly.

Rumi flopped into her chest, burying her face in Mira. Her whole body felt too warm.

"I'm going to Jeju." Mira breathed out. "Celine asked if you were joining me."

"I.. I don't know.." Rumi mumbled.

"I won't make you Ru." She cupped her cheek. "But I wanted to make it clear that Celine sounded worried if you were okay or not."

Rumi curled inward, clinging tight to Mira's back. She didn't want her to know. She'd only worry if she knew. She wouldn't be interested in Rumi anymore.

The thought of that made her feel like she couldn't breathe properly.

Her chest felt too tight. It ached to inhale, so she choked on her exhale.

"Hey hey." Mira soothed. "Ru it's okay. I promise you don't have to go."

"Zoey's going to be gone recording." Rumi teared up. "I don't want to be alone."

"I can try to delay the trip until Zoey gets back. If that would help?"

"Won't you miss the Calvin Klein shoot then?"

"Yeah, but like whatever right?" Mira offered a weak smile. "Other jobs will come along. I can say a family emergency came up."

Mira was really bending over backwards doing anything except telling Rumi she should go. She didn't want Mira to give anything up for her sake. Maybe if she went she could have a chance to talk alone with Celine and ask her not to say anything.

Then she'd have to acknowledge all the missed calls and texts she's ignored.

But maybe, just maybe the prospect of laying next to Mira at night would ease the pain enough to make it worth it.

"I'll go with." Rumi whispered.

"Rumi don't force yourself to-" Mira started.

"I want to go with you." Rumi clarified. "I want to be near you."

"You sure?" Mira looked intently at her.

"I'm sure."

"Okay. I'll text her."

The fresh mountain air on the island whipped under Mira's hat, flinging it off her head.

"Got it!" Rumi jumped up, catching it with ease.

She beamed as she ran up, tucking the hat snug onto Mira's head. She snuck a quick peck onto her sloped nose.

"You are too cute." Mira laughed.

Rumi fell in step next to the tall woman. Mira had their luggage firmly in her hands, standing straight as if the weight didn't bother her even slightly. Rumi had slung her oversized backpack on and continued to walk brushing their arms together. Mira was still getting used to a Rumi that was very touch oriented.

Or touch starved rather.

Definitely starved.

Any opportunity to be touching now, Rumi wanted it. Always sweetly asking or just lightly brushing up until she got what she wanted. It was endearing to say the least.

"Hello girls." Celine greeted them at the gate.

Rumi froze in place, staring forward at Celine. Mira stopped a few steps ahead looking back.

"Rumi I-" Celine reached out.

"Hi Celine! Great to see you! Did you get new porch plants? They look great. Usual rooms?" Rumi snapped into an eerie chipper attitude that had been missing not half a glance ago.

She waltzed right by Celine, up into the compound and around the corner that would lead to Mira's room.

Celine turned to Mira, their expressions matching in levels of bewilderment.

"Uh hey Celine." Mira walked forward, setting down the luggage to hug her.

"How was your flight?" Celine glanced back towards the house.

"Good. Good." Mira nodded. "…Okay yeah no I can't do this."

"Do what?" Celine seemed on edge.

"What the fuck was that?" Mira gestured to where Rumi once was. "What happened between you two?"

"She..she didn't tell you?" Celine's brow sank.

"No I have no idea what any of this is. She won't talk about it. Says you had a disagreement?" Mira crossed her arms.

"A disagreement?" Celine half laughed, hand flying to her face. "That's what she called it?"

"Yes she did. What would you call it?" Mira stepped forward.

"Mira she..the night of the idol awards she.." Celine fully covered her mouth, barely stifling a sob.

Mira had never and I mean never seen Celine like this. She was always stoic and steadfast. Always calm and level headed. To see her barely containing actual tears was unheard of. And how had Rumi gotten here the night of the Idol Awards and then back in such little time?

"Let's go inside." Mira stopped her. "I'll talk to Rumi. Then you and I can talk privately later."

She rubbed her mother figure's back steadily, a bit of a role reversal for them. Celine nodded, holding open the door for Mira as she carried their luggage to her old room.

The compound was a timeless place. Every art project and furniture piece and book exactly where it belonged. It was like she was 16 again, walking into the living space when an awkward, purple haired girl was suddenly staring at her.

Rumi was cute even then, but Mira had built too many walls at that point.

She pushed into the bedroom. Rumi was staring out the window, hands tight around herself. Mira set their luggage down, coming up behind her.

"You okay?" She offered tenderly.

"Yeah I'm fine." Rumi smiled.

It was her idol smile. The one meant for paparazzi and weird fans. Not for Mira.

"You aren't fine Ru." She stepped closer. "Its okay to not be fine."

"No no really." She pressed her smile wider, it almost looked painful. "I'm happy to just hang out and let her help you with your weapon issue."

"Rumi." Mira pressed.

"Mira!" She gestured outward. "I'll unpack for us." She brushed past to open the bags.

"Are you actually just going to pretend you're okay all of a sudden?" Mira barely whispered.

"I'm not pretending." Rumi didn't turn around.

Mira took a deep breath. This was going to have to branch into more direct territory. She held tight to the memory of them curled up last night before the flight, kissing softly. It might be the last one if this breaks into a fight again.

"Are you lying to me again?" She didn't let her voice waver.

Rumi froze now.

"Look at me when you answer me." Mira pushed.

Her hands were shaking, gripping one of Mira's hoodies. She hugged it to her chest as she stood slowly. She started to turn. Mira could already see the bright magenta spreading over her patterns, coating the opalescent rivers in the gritty, inked purple.

"I'm sorry." Rumi's cheeks looked like windows in the rain.

"Why?" Mira resigned herself.

"I don't want you to know." Rumi choked down a sob. It took everything in Mira to not rush over and hold her.

"I'm just trying to understand Rumi. Its frustrating because I keep telling myself you aren't keeping secrets anymore, but then you lie and gaslight me again." Mira paced, talking with her hands.

"I'm not trying to keep secrets, but some things are private and you told me that was okay." Rumi hugged the sweater, her voice raising. "I don't have any privacy anymore with my stupid patterns lighting up like a mood ring every time I feel something."

"I..I didn't think about that." Mira sat down. "Is that why you started wearing long sleeves again?"

"Well that and I get cold..and I like your hoodies. They're really soft and.. they smell like you." She sniffled.

"Can you come here?" Mira patted next to her on the bed.

Rumi silently stepped over the duffel bag, still holding the hoodie to her chest as she sat down. Mira turned to face her, setting her hand gently on Rumi's thigh. She exhaled deep.

"If you don't want me to know what happened, I won't ask. I won't bring it up. You can chose to tell me or not later on." Mira looked in her eyes now. "But I need to make it very clear that I am trusting you not to lie about it. If I ask about something and you don't want me to know details, I will trust you."

"Really?" Rumi's wet eyes grew rounder.

"But if you ever try to gaslight me about something again. I am done." Mira made sure to keep level on this. "I cannot be around someone who would do the same shit my family did to me my entire life. I can't feel like I'm losing my mind anymore. I can't."

"I never wanted to be like them." Rumi sobbed out. "I hate them for how they treated you."

"I know Ru."

"I'm really sorry." She hiccuped. "I won't pretend anymore."

"That's enough." Mira nodded. "C'mere."

Rumi practically climbed into Mira's lap. She sobbed against her chest until Mira felt her shirt grow damp. She pulled Rumi onto her lap, holding her sideways. Rumi tucked into her neck. She nuzzled her softly, mumbling damp sorrows into her skin.

"I don't want to be far from you." Rumi choked out. "I don't want to lose you."

"I'm here Ru." Mira soothed, kissing her temple.

"Can I sleep in here with you? I'm sorry I didn't ask before I came here." She pressed into her neck tighter.

"Yes Rumi. Its cute that you ask every night. You can just join me though. I don't mind." Mira rubbed her back.

"I want to keep asking until…until we're like..you know.." Rumi hid her face further.

"Okay." Mira chuckled. "Just letting you know."

Rumi sniffled and pecked Mira lightly on the neck, sending a hot jolt through her entire body. She shuddered into the touch, gripping Rumi's waist so tight she let out a small yelp.

"S-sorry." Mira cleared her throat, face bright pink.

Rumi smiled against her skin, giggling at the reaction she elicited.

"Well um- Celine is expecting me so I'm gonna..go." Mira patted Rumi's legs.

"Can I have a kiss goodbye first?" Rumi teased.

Mira leaned in, giving a quick peck before pulling away. In a moment of confidence, Rumi grabbed her chin.

"A real one." She pouted.

Mira swallowed hard. "You are trouble." She mumbled.

She leaned in, letting Rumi's grip on her jaw guide her. Rumi went for a deep, tongue slipping kiss. Mira felt yearning ache build in seconds. She would give anything to just flip Rumi onto the bed and taste her till she sees stars right now.

But alas, she had actual things to attend to.

"You are driving me crazy." She rubbed their foreheads together.

"Me too." Rumi blushed.

"See you later. Will you be okay here?"

"Yeah just..come back soon?" She held onto her shirt a lingering moment.

"Trust me, I will." She winked playfully.

Rumi hid her face behind the hoodie she had in her lap. Mira gave her one last glance before she slipped out.

Something deep in her chest burned.

"Again Mira." Celine commanded. "Concentrate on your connection to the Honmoon."

"I'm trying." Mira after explaining the problem had stripped to her tank top, now drenched in sweat from their intense training. Celine had certainly steeled herself from her disheveled form earlier.

She tugged the threads, picturing her weapon perfectly in her mind. She could feel the weight, but nothing formed fully. She squeezed her eyes shut, drawing deeper to past sensations of swinging her Gok-do. It burns the longer she strains her very soul.

"I can't." She roars, dropping her stance.

She collapsed to the ground, legs spread wide in front of her. Celine walked over, crouching down next to her.

"Do you remember the first time you summoned your weapon?" Celine mused.

"Yeah I do." Mira smiled. "You helped me channel my anger into protecting the girls."

"Where is that anger now?" She asked gently.

Mira stood up, brushing her hair back into a ponytail with her hands. She shook her arms out, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"I'm trying to be less angry."

"And how have you been going about that?" Celine circled her.

"Just..not overreacting and keeping the anger down." Mira replied carefully.

"You're repressing it?"

"I guess."

"When did you first lose the ability to summon?" Celine pushed.

"When we last fought demons."

"What specifically?"

"..I scared Rumi." She whispered.

Celine stopped hard, turning to look at Mira. She reached for her shoulder.

"What do you mean by that?"

"The…the night of the idol awards."

Celine flinched.

"When Rumi ran off stage. We saw her patterns. She shouted at us when we tried to back away and she wouldn't answer our questions. It rippled the entire Honmoon and I…I..I raised my weapon at Rumi." Mira heaved out with a choked sob.

"What?.." Celine breathed out

"I know..I don't know why I did it I just..reacted." Mira wiped her eyes. "When we were fighting the demons my weapon struck past Rumi and she looked so startled and scared. I haven't been able to summon since."

"You feel guilty about your instincts." Celine rubbed her back.

"Y-yeah actually."

"What else are you feeling?"

Mira shrunk in. The anger was bubbling up again. Tearing its way up and out her throat.

No no no please.

"Sad I guess." Mira shrugged.

"Sad?" Celine rolled the word on her tongue, grimacing as if it tasted wrong. "Is that all?"

Don't say it.

"Well I-"

Don't fucking say it.

"I'm.."

Lock it away or you'll lose her.

"Mira. Its okay to feel negative emotions, even if they're hurtful towards the people we love." She cooed. "Rumi isn't exempt from your feelings just because you care about her. It doesn't mean you care about her less."

"I'm angry." Mira muttered through her teeth.

"Say it firmly Mira. Feel it."

"I can't." She hissed.

"Mira your anger is some of the most potent I have ever experienced. I have seen what you can use it to do. You have kept Rumi and Zoey safe for years with it." Celine gripped her shoulders now. "Right now you have shoved it into a box deep down, but that has not stopped you from burning up."

Mira pursed her lips into a thin line, holding it back as best she could. Her hands shook.

"You're burning Mira."

"I'm not burning." She whispered.

"You are burning." Celine pressed.

"I'm not!" She shoved Celine away. "This isn't all I am this..there has to be more to me…there has to be." Her voice broke.

"Mira I-"

"I've had enough tonight." Mira turned away.

"Mira please just-"

"Not tonight Celine. Please just..no more."

Mira trudged through the gravel, tears falling freely to the dirt. She doesn't know how long she walked until she finds herself beneath the tree. Hunter graves were the only company here. She sat against the trunk.

Her mind reeled and unwound itself here, threads of Honmoon untangling a song from her chest. She let her voice barely breach her lips as she sang to herself.

If you see the girl I used to be

Could you tell her that I'd really like to find her

And if you see the shell that's left of me

Could you spare her a little kindness

Tears fell silently as she closed her eyes.

'Cause I've been high and I've been low

Spent a thousand nights alone, tryna hold on tight

And feelings come, but they won't go

Please won't someone take me home before I lose my mind

She choked out a sob, gripping over her heart where blue threads gathered.

Am I broken?

Am I flawed?

Do I deserve, a shred of worth or am I

Just another, fake fucked up lost cause

And am I human?

Or am I something else

'Cause I'm so scared, there's no one there

To save me from the nightmare

That I call myself

Mira felt the Honmoon drape a warmth over her shaking body as she sang.

I've tried everything and anything

But nothing seems to work quite like it should

Between the madness and the apathy

Seems there's nothing left inside of me that's good-

The crunch of gravel made Mira quickly choke down her song and wipe her eyes. Celine came around the gateway, pausing before fully entering.

"Mira?" She called.

"Yeah..yeah I'm here." She brushed her tapered cargo pants off.

Celine stared at a spot just ahead of her. Mira steps forward and is bombarded with an agonizingly loud voice.

"ALL OF ME!"

Mira falls to her knees, gripping her ears. Celine does the same, gripping her heart tightly as if it will fall out if she does not hold on. The voice it was..warped and reverberating in her ears, but undeniable.

It was Rumi.

Chapter Text

Rumi flipped through This is How you Lose the Time War, curled under a blanket with Mira 's hoodie on her pillow like a pillowcase. It didn't ease that ache that wanted to listen to Mira's heartbeat underneath her. Rumi found herself really immersed in the poetic language and metaphorical speaking on the book. It was such a Mira book it hurt.

I love how I have no armor here.

Rumi traced over red highlighter of that line. She wanted that. To hide nothing from Mira and be comfortable with it. To give Mira every intricate, broken piece of her. Mira would carry each one like the world would fall apart if she let go.

So why did she have to grip her pieces so hard they cut her own hands?

Mira had jagged edges too. She knew the dangerous beauty of them. So why wouldn't Rumi just let her in?

Why was it so scary?

She lurched upward as her heart was yanked by threads as if on a leash, a blood curdling sound echoed out over everything. She fell out of bed as magenta thrummed across the Honmoon.

"Mira..Mira no.." Rumi panicked, crawling towards that feeling of panic and dread she felt smothering her.

The door nearly broke off its hinges as her patterns flared and she ripped it open, sprinting out towards the pull.

"Please be okay..please be okay…please be okay."

She wasn't sure who she was begging to.

Anything that would listen and let Mira be safe.

She shouldered the front door open, eyes scanning every direction for a sign. She pulled towards the tree, iridescent threads coiling into a tornado there in the distance.

Rumi ran harder than she ever has. Her weapon appeared in her hand, dragging through the dirt and carving a path to Mira.

Celine was in the dirt, pressing towards the threads, trying to get through.

"What's happening?!" Rumi screamed over the roar of echoes.

"I-I don't know!" Celine's voice like a dropped plate on concrete. "She was leaving to join me back at the house and this just started!"

"Mira she's-"

"Inside." Celine nodded. "My connection to the new Honmoon is too weak, I can't weave through."

"Let me try!" Rumi pressed forward.

Her fingers met with white, burning intensity. Not quite pain and not quite heat, something else, something raw. The threads caught and tangled on her fingers as she clawed through the swirling wall. She was close enough now that she started hearing glimpses of voices, memories she recognized.

You're keeping something from me!

We are hunters, voices strong..

Why couldn't you love me?!

Didn't you see it? See the gold?

I left them!

I knew it. I knew it was too good to be true.

How do you have patterns?

You told me to cover up, to hide!

Look, I'm kind of a difficult person.

ALL OF ME!

It was so much, too much..how was Mira in this? Her hand cut through a gap, and she finally heard the raspy, choked screams of Mira.

Her voice was torn and tattered, even over the noise. As if someone has gripped her vocal cords and scraped them raw. Rumi squinted through the threads and caught a glimpse. Mira was curled up on the ground, hands gripping her ears, sobs clawing out of her. The threads were curling into her chest, wrapping around the deep purple core at her center.

"Mira!" Rumi called out.

She didn't respond, just pressed her forehead into the dirt as she cried out.

"Mira I'm here! Reach for me please!" Rumi forced her hand through.

Rumi's fingers stretched for one of the threads attached to Mira's soul. They barely glanced off before she finally managed to tangle it in her grasp. She pulled it taut towards her. Mira lurched forward, collapsing on her elbow.

"Mira please!" Rumi shrieked, pulling more.

Mira glanced up, eyes glowing fully like opals. Upon seeing Rumi, they flickered back to their crimson brown so briefly. Her expression shifted as she dragged herself to her.

"Rumi?" She sounded shattered.

"I'm here Mira just reach please!"

Mira crawled to her, ground cracking underneath her as if there were 4 tons of brick weighing her down. Her elbows and knees buckled into the cracked earth.

"Its…too much..too heavy…I can't."

"You can Mira!" Rumi begged. "You can, I know you can! You're so strong!"

The threads sharpened to a razor edge, slicing faintly at her skin. She gritted her teeth and held out longer.

"Rumi just leave me!" Mira broke down, her hands in the dirt.

"Never!" Rumi lunged forward, grabbing Mira's wrist.

She threw them backwards, tumbling out of the funnel covered in small cuts and bruises. Mira collapsed on top of her, breath heavy and ragged. She crawled to the side and started to retch, leaving their comforting touch.

"Mira dear are you okay?" Celine came to her side, patting her back as she vomited.

"We're here Mir. We're here." Rumi cried softly.

They draped over her back, all crying over each other. Mira hadn't spoken yet. Still spitting and heaving into the dirt. Her tears falling down her face like a dripping faucet. Mira was mumbling so quietly they could barely make out the words.

"..all my fault…she could have been……I should have noticed…."

"Mira?" Rumi rubbed her back.

"…I don't deserve to feel anymore…I can't be angry anymore…can't be here…she didn't want to be…"

"Mira hey.." Rumi leaned down. "Mira I'm here."

"The Honmoon shows me everything…whether I want it or not……it hurts…….make it stop…" Mira rambled, eyes wide.

Rumi moved in front of the mumbling form of Mira, tilting her head up. She froze, pink strands falling into her eyes. She let out a broken sob.

"I'm sorry." Mira's voice tore like paper. "I didn't mean to see.. didn't mean to know.."

Rumi stilled, sitting back into the ground.

"..what did you see Mira?" Rumi's voice pitched upward to a thread ready to be cut.

"That night…here…..the tree you-" Mira covered her mouth. "You asked Celine to-"

Rumi's heart sank, plummeting down into that dark place she didn't let anyone into.

"Its all my fault…I could've lost….you were just trying to…" Mira rocked back and forth.

Celine held Mira close to her. She brushed her hair back and soothed her. Rumi couldn't do anything, but stare. Her heart beat too fast, she felt it in her entire chest.

"Mira…can you summon your weapon at all?" Celine urged.

"I…I can't feel the Honmoon.." Mira shattered into deep, wretched sobs. "I feel empty Celine."

Rumi crawled over. She held Mira's hand. The tie that she felt to her it…it was gone..

"We'll…we'll fix it Mira.." Rumi stammered.

"I don't deserve to be a hunter.." she whispered.

"No Mira that's not true." Celine held onto her.

Mira stood shakily, shoving Celine off of her. She held her chest tight, a haunting vacancy taking over her face.

"I am nothing." Mira said firmly. "Rumi wanted to be gone because of me. Someone stronger should stand next to you. Someone who deserves your…affections."

Mira turned away, walking with the steady crunch of gravel echoing loudly in the sea of silence left.

"Mira no where are you going?" Rumi ran after her, grabbing her arm.

"I don't want to hurt you anymore." Mira tugged her arm free.

"You're hurting me if you leave!" Rumi grabbed her more firmly. "Mira please let me explain."

"You don't need to." She kept her gaze down. "I felt it. All of it. The despair. Anguish. Self-loathing. You were so lonely." Mira whispered. "You lost everything and I let you run away."

"But I found you both again. You were the first soul to reach back for me at the tower." Rumi pleaded.

"I fell apart. You and Zoey almost died because of me. Because I saw you and saw an enemy, for even a bitter moment." Mira sniffled softly. "How do you not hate me?"

"I could never hate you." Rumi hugged against her back, pressing her cheek into Mira's tense shoulders. "Never ever."

"You should." Mira didn't turn around, didn't hold her like normal. Rumi wanted the normal she needed that normal.

Turn around please

Hold me, kiss me, tell me you love me.

I'm begging you to love me despite what I am.

Please love me in spite of my endless lies.

"Mira what was it like? In there?" Celine came closer. "Talk to us."

Mira didn't answer for a long time, Rumi kept firmly attached to her back. Letting go felt like giving her up. It felt like never getting Mira's warmth or care again. It was agony.

"There was..so much noise." Mira started. "The threads were all intersecting, I couldn't tell what was memory and what was thought. I could see nightmares and visions of the past. It was like I was living them. Over and over and over again."

"Keep going, what else was there?" Celine urged her on.

"A box." Mira shuddered. "Chained and locked away in the center."

"The feelings you were repressing." Celine affirmed. "That's what the Honmoon was trying to give you."

"I don't want them. They ruin everything."

"But they're yours regardless."

"Not anymore."

Mira gripped Rumi's hands and ripped them away, walking forward towards the compound. Rumi went to pursue her, but Celine held her back.

"Give her a moment." Celine brought Rumi to her chest, embracing her. "Are you okay love?"

Rumi unraveled into Celine, sobbing and clawing and aching all at once. Celine only soothed her gently. The woman she begged to end her life was holding her tight now, like she was precious.

"No..no I'm not." Rumi admitted.

The center of the Honmoon had been silent.

So deadly quiet, even Mira's breathes felt muted and heavy in the dark.

There was a single pale light. Right in the middle. Swaying softly over that ugly crate.

The box of mismatched materials and colors, jaggedly welded together. Chains clinging to it cold and sturdy.

Mira could hear the thrashing.

Like something drowning.

The chains lurched and buckled holding it closed. Keeping that ravenous, hateful thing contained. Mira felt the key in her pocket.

Waiting.

Expecting.

Hungry to taste that wicked padlock.

She threw it into the storm. It only came back.

She wouldn't ever be rid of it.

So all she could do was sit with her back against it, feeling the bruises bloom on her back with each violent thrash and roar from inside. The force bobbed her head forward each time.

She couldn't recall when her glasses had cracked like spiderwebs.

She took them off.

And left them on the gnarled, filthy crate.

Rumi stared down into her tea, steam curling up to brush her cheek. Celine sat quiet across from her.

"Rumi.. I'm sorry." Celine murmured. "That night I..I shouldn't have.."

"Its okay Celine." Rumi interrupted.

"No. It isn't." Celine steadied herself. "I never intended for you to hate yourself. Never wanted you to feel like a mistake. I failed at that."

Rumi sat quietly, listening to each word.

"When I lost your mother. It felt like I lost my ability to love and all I could taste was grief. But I had this baby, this little precious girl would reached for me like I was her world."Celine laughed softly at the memory. "You had such tiny little hands."

Rumi chuckled half-heartedly, mildly warmed by hearing Celine talk so fondly.

"I promised to love and accept you the way your mother would have. The way you deserved. But I let my own subconscious prejudice affect how I spoke of your patterns. I disregarded them. Treated them like they were some separate filthy part to you."

Rumi tugged her sleeve down instinctively.

"I should have let you tell them."

"No." Rumi spat. "You were right."

"Rumi no I-"

"You weren't there." Rumi pressed. "Once they saw it was me they decided I wasn't on their side anymore. Mira and Zoey didn't think I was an imposter. They didn't ask if I was okay. They just..became afraid of me."

"Rumi I'm sure they were confused and hurt.'

"I begged them you know." Rumi said slowly. "I begged them to stay and they pointed their weapons still. I was nothing, but a monster to them now."

"You're not talking like yourself."

"Why? Because I'm not just saying what people want to hear?" Rumi pursed her lips tight. "Because I've done nothing, but try to be agreeable and play along and now the only person I've ever had feelings for is walking away from me."

"She isn't walking away Rumi. Mira has always adored you. She'll be back to you. She always does." Celine reached for her hand. "Remember your first fight? Mira disappeared for hours and you were so worried you were out there with a lantern looking for her."

"I got lost." Rumi mumbled, fingers scrapping the wood of the table.

"Mira had gotten back before you. The second she heard you were alone outside she sprinted out after you." Celine smiled fondly. "She carried you back herself and wrapped your sprained ankle."

Rumi felt the corners of her mouth quirk up. She was a flustered mess being carried by Mira. Her hands on Rumi's thighs, her panting breathes up and down the mountains, even the scent of her sweat as Rumi laid on her.

"I brought her into this house, but you and Zoey became her home." Celine affirmed. "The Mira I know, always comes home."

Rumi absorbed the thought. The idea of being someone's home. What home felt like for her.

"We have to get angry with each other…don't we?" Rumi barely let the sound escape her.

"You have both been bottling up quite a lot." Celine nodded. "You are going to say hurtful things. It will make things tense between you for a while. It will feel broken. But you love each other. No negative experience has ever changed that for you two."

"She has been uncharacteristically level these last few days." Rumi chuckled sadly.

"You need to give her space to feel the anger."

"I know."

"And you need to show her yours."

"I know." Rumi's voice cracked.

"She isn't going to feel it without our support. It will feel like too much alone."

"I'll be there."

"Let's give her the night to rest. We'll try again tomorrow."

"Do you think I can check on her?" Rumi pouted.

"I think she might like that." Celine rubbed Rumi's arms and stood.

Rumi sat there a moment, following the grain of the wood in the table. Mira was just back in her room.

Only a short walk away.

Mira didn't remember getting into bed. She felt cold.

No that wasn't right.

Devoid.

Her only company was the sound of that fucking banging. The ugly crate grating across the floor. Her own distorted voice resonating outward.

What? Are you scared of me?

Mira shuddered and closed her eyes.

You don't like the prison I built you?

The faint opening of a door.

Look at me.

The dip in the bed behind her.

Fucking look at me coward.

Warmth.

You're embarrassing.

Lavender.

You'll never bury me. You can't dig deep enough with your bare hands.

Soft lips on her temple.

You'll only fall apart.

"Mira." Her sweet voice reverberated through her. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm not." Mira's voice was flat, empty even.

"You are."

"I won't."

"We have to Mira." Rumi nuzzled into her. "I'm scared too."

"Right now?" Mira's voice cracked.

"No." Rumi rubbed her side softly. "No tonight just…just sleep Mir. I'll be right here."

"I'm sorry…about the idol awards." Mira's breath shuddered.

"Tomorrow Mir." Rumi soothed. "We'll talk tomorrow."

Rumi snuggled close to her, letting sleep take them both into dreamless night.

Mira had been awake since dawn.

Her old spot on the roof, looking out over the compound with a perfect view of the sunrise. The iridescent sheen of the honmoon over the mountains melted into the warm tones of sunlight. Faint threads followed her finger tips when she reached. Nowhere near the strength of bond she was used to.

"I see you still seek height when you're upset."

Mira turned slightly to receive a steaming mug from Celine, who took a seat next to her. Celine had dark circles under her eyes. Sipping the mug rewarded Mira with hot coffee and creamer.

"Rumi asked you to to kill her." Mira stated bluntly.

"She did."

"Why did she think you would?" Mira stared forward at the sunrise.

"I.. don't entirely know. I know I made her hate her patterns, but I..I thought I had loved her enough to…stop those habits." Celine spoke slowly, restraint heavy on her voice.

"Habits?" Mira suddenly felt a twinge in her heart, something aching.

"Rumi has been.. complicated for a very long time. I should have realized sooner. And maybe a part of me did know and just.. wasn't sure how to handle it." Celine explained. "She always had this, rapid healing. I'm sure you and Zoey have experienced it."

"She did always take care of her injuries herself. She got a huge bruise the other day and it's already gone." Mira informed flatly.

"When she was younger, Rumi would try to..remove…her patterns."

Mira's eyes went wide. Her head turned to face Celine for the first time fully in the morning light. To see her mother figure, with sunrise illuminated tears running silently down her face, is enough to shake Mira.

"She hurt herself?" Mira's voice wavered over a question she knew the answer to.

"Yes." Celine breathed. "I thought she had stopped, but now I think…I think she just got better at hiding it."

"..fuck." Mira mumbled, head falling into her hands. A half drank mug abandoned beside her.

"She didn't truly seem better until she met you and Zoey." Celine touched her back. "You brought out a playfulness to her I hadn't seen since she was little."

Mira wiped her eyes, sitting back up fully.

"I'm so scared to let it all out Celine." Mira choked.

"I know dear." Celine hugged her into her side like a small child. "We'll be there."

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"Once it's all out in the air, we can begin to talk it through."

"What if I can't do it?" She cried softly into Celine's cardigan.

"Then we try again another way."

Celine keeps her arm around Mira a while, rubbing her shoulder until the tears stop.

Rumi woke up alone, the empty space in front of her that carried the memory of Mira's scent. She blinked away heavy sleep, pulling Mira's abandoned hoodie on. The sunbeams reached through curtains, sprawling across the bed.

Just days prior a morning like this she'd be tangled up with Mira warm and ignorantly happy. She misses it. Now she just had this bitter taste she had to deal with.

A light knock at the door.

"Come in." She called.

"I made you tea." Celine stepped in, taking in Rumi's messy braid and somber expression.

"Thanks." She sipped it. "Have you seen Mira?"

"She is on the roof."

"The..roof?" Rumi raised a brow.

"Watching the sunrise." Celine moved closer. "Would you like help with your hair?"

"Yeah..yeah actually that'd be nice." Rumi relaxed her shoulders.

She sat at the foot of the bed between Celine's legs, her hair slowly unraveled by knowing fingers who had created and memorized the shape of it.

"How is she?" Rumi whispered, elbows on her knees.

"She is afraid." Celine wove the strands together on top of her head.

"I wish this was easier." Rumi tucked her face.

"I know my dear." Celine soothed. "You both deserve peace."

"What if this breaks us?" Rumi sniffled. "And I lose her forever."

"I trust Mira's resolve. She is one of the strongest souls I have ever felt. She will not go far from you. You are her gravity."

Rumi quieted herself, sitting as her hair was woven into a neat braid behind her. She felt so tired. So ready to close her eyes. She missed Mira helping her sleep.

The Honmoon rippled magenta.

"Mira." Rumi sprang up, running out of the room. She could hear Celine close behind.

They burst outside to see the fuchsia typhoon roaring and tearing out in the field past the tree. Mira was doing this alone.

"No. No." Celine ran behind Rumi.

Rumi felt each violent jolt up her legs as she ran across the stones. The storm roiled and cracked loud above them.

"Mira!" She screamed in.

Rumi took a breath, pressing into the swirling tangle of threaded agonies. Celine gripped her shoulders, following her in.

The force with stronger, harder to get through. She barely made it a few steps in before a pulse thrummed over them.

Rumi felt intense burning in her chest, her eyes stung and throat clenched. Every muscle felt charged, ready to explode outward. The grinding of her own teeth and bellicose heartbeat overpowered the roar of the storm.

Another pulse over them.

Pain. This one ached like a bruise being pressed on. Tearing and gnawing beneath her skin so much that she wanted to claw it away. Her knuckles hurt.

The next wave was furious and white hot, blinding and bleak and overwhelming all at once. Her knees buckled as if weighed down with anchors.

It was so much.

Too much for one person.

She had to get to Mira.

She fell forward into still dirt, Celine at her side. The threads dissipated, leaving just Mira with her back to them. The storm gone.

Mira collapsed to one knee.

"Mira!" Rumi sprinted over, sliding to her knees next to her, ignoring the burning tear at her skin. "Mira look at me."

She touched her cheeks, turning her to look her way. The empty look from last night was kindling for the returned spark in her eyes now. Those crimson eyes that saw everything.

"I'm okay." She swallowed hard.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" Rumi shouted. "We have no idea what we're working with Mira. You should have waited for us."

"I can handle myself." Mira stood, helping Rumi up with her.

"Mira you could have overwhelmed yourself so easily. I have been worried sick about you and promising we'd do this together and then you just run off alone? Seriously?" Rumi pushed away slightly.

"You shouldn't have to fix me Rumi. I got it." Mira affirmed. "I didn't need or want to rope you into all my bullshit negativity."

"Maybe I needed you!" Rumi shoved her. "Okay! Maybe I wanted to know what you're thinking together. Not all of us can just read people like books Mira."

"If you want my thoughts, I will tell them to you." Mira stepped forward. "You can trust me not to lie."

"Unlike me right?" Rumi spat. "Just like a demon to tell lies and keep secrets is that it?"

"Rumi no that's not what I'm saying. I just don't want to tuck everything away anymore. I want to slowly let myself feel it." She took Rumi's hand. "I want to be better for you."

"Then stop leaving me behind." She took a shaky exhale.

"I have done nothing, but run after you Rumi. Seeking you out and checking on you. I gave you everything I could to make sure you're okay." Mira gestured with her hands.

"Except the one time I needed it most." Rumi's patterns flared.

"That isn't fair after what you did and you know it." Mira stood taller, looming. "I tried to come to you. I tried to tell you that I felt like you were keeping something from me. You promised me you weren't. I gave you every fucking opportunity to tell us. To tell me. And you just made me feel crazy. You blamed my insecurities!"

"I begged you." Rumi teared up. "I just had my worst nightmare play out in front of thousands of people and instead of holding me you threatened me."

"We tried talking. We asked you where the patterns came from. We asked how we were supposed to trust you. You didn't answer any of them and then you snapped at us. You weakened the Honmoon Rumi." Mira growled.

"I couldn't think clearly! One second the Honmoon was almost gold and the next thing I know you and Zoey are tearing me apart!" Rumi cracked out a roar. "I was so relieved when I realized it wasn't you saying those things to me. Then you just stared at me like some rabid animal that needed put down."

"I didn't know what to think anymore. I thought everything between us was a lie. All I knew was that I needed to protect Zoey and the fans and-"

"What about me Mira?!" Rumi sobbed. "You let me run off and didn't come get me. You always come get me. Always."

"You broke my heart Rumi!" Mira's voice rattled her bones. "You lied to me constantly for years! You betrayed us and worked with some pretty boy demon! You pushed and pushed and pushed and I always let you. All you had to do was say what you really wanted."

"I wanted to fix me! I wanted to save the world and be together! That's why I pushed. I did it for us! I worked with Jinu for us! I wanted us." Rumi pushed back.

"If you had just talked to me you would have known you weren't something to fix!"

"Yeah cause you finding out about my patterns went so great the first time!"

Mira stilled, jaw ticking.

"Fuck you." Mira spit.

"Excuse me?" Rumi gasped incredulously.

"Fuck. You." Mira scowled.

"Seriously?" Rumi scoffed. "You're doing this now?

"You're treating me like I've done anything before this, but adore you." Mira hissed. "I did nothing, but be proud of you. Be there. Be an option you never wanted. I fell apart when you left. I gave in to Gwi-Ma immediately. I left Zoey. I was ready to hand my soul over when I thought my family was build on lies.

"I wanted you more than anything." Rumi retorted. "You would never have loved me with my patterns. I was born carrying a shame that wasn't mine and raised to think they were this ugly, dirty part of me to be hidden away."

"I do now!" Mira ran her hands over her face. "Your patterns were never the thing keeping us apart. You were just Rumi. I knew you so long you were always just Rumi, you'd never have been a monster."

"You can't say that like you know." Rumi crossed her arms. "You have zero idea what would have happened."

"I know that I have spent years using every single day to find things I love about you. Even now I look at your patterns like this beautiful gilded piece of you. All I needed was your trust. To know you hadn't made a deal with our sworn enemy. Instead you hid away and let me stay an arms length back always."

"I wanted to tell you."

"But you didn't!" Mira ran her fingers through her hair. "Even after we didn't live under Celine's roof anymore you kept secrets. Hiding your patterns, your injuries, your voice faltering."

Rumi didn't respond a moment.

"The lying isn't what bothered me. It was how easily and effortlessly you lie. You can look me right in my eyes and convince me you're telling the truth without batting an eye." Mira trembled. "I regret raising my weapon at you more than anything I've done. But I know I never would have actually hurt you. I could never have killed you like you weren't just Rumi."

"Maybe you should have."

"Don't you fucking dare." Mira's voice was dangerously low. "How fucking dare you think there is any reality I want you dead in."

"Oh how dare I feel worthless?" Rumi spat, her patterns a white hot purple. "But you can beat your hands to a bloody pulp and that's what you call well adjusted?"

"That's not-" Mira stopped short.

"And you still never told me why."

"Because I felt like shit okay? I hate how aggressive and rough I am. I care about you so fucking much it aches when I'm away from you. All I do is trigger your bad memories and start fights and get under your skin. The pain was the only way I felt like I was earning your forgiveness. That maybe I could deserve your affection."

"You've always deserved my affection. I don't want you to hurt yourself you idiot. Its not good..I know it doesn't fix anything..not really." Rumi bit her lip. "When we built the new Honmoon, I thought if I just became okay that you would want me."

"I always have." Mira whispered. "I still do. I just don't feel like I deserve you yet."

"I'm sick of other people deciding what I deserve. I've told you I want you. But you've still not laid any claim to me. Not called me yours. Or become mine." Rumi pouted involuntarily. "You let me kiss you and be in your bed every night, but you won't call us more than friends."

"I didn't know if you wanted more than just comfort. I've always been physical distraction for people. I was afraid that's all I was again."

"I wanted everything you'd give me."

Rumi turned away, arms tight around herself. The magenta glow of the patterns stark against her pale skin.

"Rumi." Mira reached for her.

"Don't." Rumi's shoulders scrunched, fading to dark blue glow.

"Rumi.." her tone softer this time.

"I can't do this." Rumi croaked out through tears.

Rumi closed her eyes, vanishing in a cloud of opalescent smoke.

Chapter Text

"Uhhh Rumi?" Zoey sat with her mouth hanging open, cereal falling off her spoon. "How did uh…how did you just appear in the kitchen?"

Rumi stood from her knees, a dull ache forming from her landing. She was home..how was she home?

"I might have…teleported?" She looked around, no Mira with her.

"Like how the demons do?" Zoey sat back, gathering up her half finished bowl to walk over. "Hey you okay?"

Rumi felt her bottom lip betray her as it trembled. She turned towards Zoey, eyes glassy and blurring at the edges.

"I-I think I just ruined everything." A broken sob forcing itself out.

"Hey hey hey, come here unnie." Zoey set her bowl down, open arms wrapping around Rumi's shoulders.

"Zoey." Rumi choked into her shoulder, gripping the smaller girl tight.

"I got you Ru." She rubbed her elder friend's back in firm circles. "Tell me what happened."

They sat together on their couch, it felt less full without Mira's long legs stretched out across it. Rumi cradled the cup of tea Zoey had made her. She filled Zoey in on their trip, how she'd been sleeping in Mira's room and they had kissed a few times, the odd events with the Honmoon swirling possessively around Mira, and finally the verbal fight they had before Rumi prompted wanted to be away from it all so badly that her demonic nature kicked in and brought her home.

"You just left?" Zoey gasped.

"Yeah." Rumi tucked into herself. "I didn't entirely mean to. Not all the way here at least."

"Are you going to go back"

"..no." Rumi set her chin on her knees. "I don't think I can right now."

"Well.. I'm happy to see you." She rubbed Rumi's shoulder.

"I'm happy to see you too." Rumi smiled shyly. "How was the recording?"

"Ugh so fun!" She crossed her legs on the sofa, turning to face her more. "I really like how it came out. They're gonna release it in a couple weeks."

"I can't wait to hear it." Rumi relaxed slightly.

"Its different for me, but I think I did really good!" Zoey clapped.

"Did you have any plans for today?" Rumi shrugged.

"I was actually gonna just chill and hit up a party tonight." Zoey leaned back. "You want to come? Or we could do something here together since you're in the feels."

"I could try a party." Rumi shrugged.

"We will get you dolled up and looking hot tonight." Zoey assured. "Maybe a drink or two."

"Yeah okay." Rumi smiled.

"Yay!" Zoey tackled her into a hug, their cheeks squishing together.

"Let's party?" Rumi shrugged.

"Fuck yeah." Zoey squeezed tighter.

Rumi could barely hear herself think over the loud music. Multi colored lights and strobes flickered at her eyes, irritating them slightly. Her drink was okay, fruity and light. Nothing to write home about. Mira usually picked out their drinks for them. She knew both their tastes so well that any decision was as easy as a snap to her.

Damn it Rumi was supposed to not be thinking about Mira tonight. She had promised to let loose and have fun with Zoey.

But she was a bit occupied making out with some androgynous figure on the dance floor. Good for her.

Rumi wandered along the walls, scanning the environment carefully. She bumped into someone enough to stop her.

"Woah sorry sweetheart." The tall man grunted, stumbling slightly.

"Its okay." Rumi moved to go past him.

"You're like, so hot." he grinned.

"Thank you."

She knew that much. Idol training demanded she be attractive. Perfect body, make up, skin, and hair. Rumi herself was like a toxic plant, colorful and deadly, patterns displayed on her pale legs beneath her tight skirt.

"Can I buy you a drink?" He slurred.

"I'm okay for now, but that's kind of you."

"Hey come on I'm just being friendly." He blocked her.

"And I don't want to sit right now."

He grabbed her waist, sending a shudder up her body. The grip lacked any softness or aching care. Nothing like the way she had gotten used to. Nothing like how Mira held her. She shoved at him, sending him toppling over a stool and crashing down.

"Fucking bitch." He groaned.

She stepped back slowly, eyes all drawing towards her now.

Her pulse leapt into her throat.

The sudden flash of stage lights.

"No." She muttered, stepping backwards, it was too hot. Her long sleeve marbled top clung to her skin like it was sewn in.

The audience yelling out as lights darken.

"No no no." She stumbled, feeling bodies at her back in the crowd.

Zoey and Mira ripping her jacket off of her.

"Please stop!" She shrieks, hugging herself.

She felt arms wrap around her, pulling her out of the crowd and towards the door. She couldn't breathe. Everything was too much, too loud, too strong scented.

Her stomach flipped and she retched, swallowing down bile she didn't dare let out in public. Her face met cool night air and the relief was a rush. Two hands gripped her face, drawing her gaze toward warm brown eyes—familiar to her.

"Rumi it's okay you're safe." Zoey soothed. "Its okay I'm here."

"Zoey I-I want to go home." Rumi whimpered.

"Not a problem baby girl let's go." Zoey put her arm around her, leading her away from the noise and liquor and cigarette smoke.

"I'm sorry." Rumi sniffled, bundled in a blanket on the couch.

"Don't you dare apologize." Zoey plopped down next to her. "Are you feeling better?"

"A little." She snuggled the blanket around her, pulling it over her head till just her eyes were visible. "I miss Mira."

"Want to call her?" Zoey peeked in the blanket.

"What if she doesn't want to talk to me?"

"Pfft, have you met Mira?" Zoey snorted.

"Is it too soon?"

"I doubt that." Zoey hummed.

"Will you talk to her first?"

"Yeah I can." Zoey gave a reassuring smile.

She pulled out her phone, moving up against Rumi's side.

"Ready?"

"Yeah." Rumi bundles herself tighter, holding her breath.

She called.

The line rang on quite a while. Until Mira's voicemail tone broke out.

"Its Mira. Leave it."

"Hey Mir it's Zoey! Just checking in, give me a call back when you're free. Love you bunches."

She tossed her phone next to her, circling her hand over Rumi's blanketed back.

"I'm going to go lay down." Rumi stood, letting the blanket roll off like a dark wave.

"Let me know if you need anything." Zoey grabbed her hand gently.

"I will." Rumi nodded.

She trudged back to her room, ready to collapse into bed and forget the night.

The smell hit her first.

Sweet spices and fragrant florals.

She hadn't even processed walking right past her own room to Mira's. The bed was still pristine—clothes hung in order of sleeve length, then color. Rumi wandered in the dark, demon eyes reflecting like an animal's in the mirror.

She traced along Mira's dresser, glancing over the framed photo of the three of them at their favorite restaurant for Rumi's birthday.

Mira's jewelry box sat unopened next to it, an antique looking ring gently resting.

"Huh. Never noticed you before." Rumi used her nails to pick it up, rolling the cool metal and stone in her hand.

The ring was what felt like real silver, twisting and ornate like ocean waves coming to a crest around a sapphire polished to a regal shine. It was definitely old, but wonderfully well cared for. Rumi couldn't recall Mira ever wearing it. Actually, it looked too small for her.

Rumi slipped it on.

It was a perfect fit.

She held it close to her chest, a warm thrum echoing out through her. Her heart finally slowed to a comfortable lull.

"Pretty." She spun it on her ring finger slowly.

Her pacing continued around Mira's space, consuming every detail she hadn't before like she had been starved of them.

She was starving.

She paused at a shelf of odd random objects in the corner. Paper, trinkets, and crafts. She saw a small framed drawing of Mira in a cartoonish style, scribbled with messy handwriting.

I want to dance like you some day miss Mira.

From Eunji

Rumi remembered this picture. Their first signing. A teenage girl was the only one to come up to Mira. She gave her this exact paper.

She looked at the shelf again, deeper.

A toy key chain she was gifted in Japan.

Letters from the ballet academy girls in Seoul.

A bracelet woven with pink and black thread from their US tour.

The whole shelf was gifts from their fans. Mira kept every single one. All neatly displayed for her alone. Rumi smiled, brushing her thumb over the ring.

The subtle edge of comfort she obtained from just being in Mira's space brought sleep to her eyes. She was very careful to place the ring back in its spot, grabbing a sweater out of Mira's closet to put over the pillow next to her.

She crawled into Mira's bed, snuggling her face into the pillow and soft hoodie. The smell wrapped around her, but the absence of Mira's body heat and soft rubs brought quiet sobs out of Rumi.

She missed her so much it ached.

Zoey flipped through the comic in her lap, headphones firmly latched over her ears. She couldn't resist the guilt that gnawed at her, having left Rumi alone at the party she invited her to.

Her heart cracked a little watching Rumi sadly shuffle into Mira's empty room.

She's known about Mira's feelings for Rumi longer than Mira knew herself. Even through all the bickering and rough sparring matches there was always a tender look left in Mira's eyes for Rumi. And her two, but the faintest glimmer of a difference was enough for her to puzzle it out.

She felt a faint buzz at her side.

Mira was calling, she scrambled to pick up.

"Mira hey!" She played casual. "What's up girl?"

"I was doing some training with Celine, didn't have my phone. You okay?" Mira's voice was hoarse.

"Yeah I'm fine." She was only slightly dancing around that truth. "How is the trip?"

"Eventful." Mira's tone was defeated.

"…How so?" Zoey tested.

"Zoey…is Rumi there?" Mira strained to keep her composure, even over the phone.

"Yes."

"Is she safe?" Her voice cracked on the final word.

"Yeah she's safe. Asleep in your room."

Silence flowed through the phone for a beat, Zoey wasn't sure when was the exact time to cut in. She just sat a moment till it felt right.

"Are you okay?" Zoey asked softly.

"What?"

"Are. You. Okay?" Zoey said slowly.

"I will be." Mira sighed. "Thanks..for asking."

"Of course. How you're feeling matters too Mir."

"I forget that sometimes so..thank you."

"What are you doing now?" Zoey curled on her side, phone to her ear tight.

"I just made tea and ran a hot bath to soak my muscles." Mira groaned. "Celine has been brutal to say the least."

"Well that's not new." Zoey giggled. "When do you come back?"

"The Calvin Klein shoot is in a couple days in the afternoon. I will probably stay in a hotel a few days around some other jobs Bobby lined up."

"You aren't coming home?" Her tone was worry laced.

"I think…Rumi seemed like she wanted space. I just want to give her everything she needs."

"She misses you real bad." Zoey whispered.

"I miss her too." Mira croaked out.

"Speaking of." Zoey rolled onto her back. "What's all this cuddling and kissing between you two? I thought you didn't want just that because it hurt too much."

"She's worth it."

"Mira.."

"I mean it." Mira affirmed. "Every word. She is worth it."

"I need to get ready for bed, but keep in touch?"

"Of course."

"Can I…also make a uh..selfish request?" Zoey chewed on her lip.

"You've never been selfish a day in your life so.. absolutely." Mira hummed.

"Can we not tell Rumi about us talking..for now?" Zoey shifted. "I'm worried it'll upset her that I'm talking to you without her."

"I can do that." Mira affirmed.

"Thanks." Zoey let her breath out. "I appreciate it. Really I do."

"Its no problem at all. Sorry you're stuck in the middle..I..I know you hate that." Mira cooed.

"Honestly it means a lot just to hear that acknowledged. I know you try to solve stuff without me mediating." Zoey exhaled.

"Bare minimum thing." Mira said sharply.

"Ugh fine I know. Bare minimum." Zoey chuckled.

A habit Mira had formed between them. When one of them thanked the other for something the they think is a basic necessity, you simply declare it so. Zoey had been confused the first couple times Mira had done it, until eventually Mira explained it.

Now it felt like a sweet little mark of their friendship.

"I'll let you go." Mira echoed through softly.

"Okay." Zoey stretched, elongating her vowel. "But I mean it you better text me and update me on your days."

"Okay okay I will." Mira let out her first quiet laugh of the call.

"Love you Mir."

"Love you too Zo."

The line went dead, resuming Zoey's music at full volume with a start.

"Shit!" She yanked them off.

Zoey tossed the headphones and comic onto her table, stretching out her body as she stood. Time to shower and plot out operation: keep Rumi distracted.

3 days later…

"So..what is this place?" Rumi quirked her brow.

Rumi gazed up at the neon plastered, odd carpeted building in front of them.

"I told you it's an arcade! We're gonna play games and eat!" Zoey bounced.

"Its very..bright?" Rumi shrugged with an awkward smile.

"And greasy! Come on! Kaja kaja kaja!" Zoey tugged her along.

Everything was boisterous, the smell of junk food and alcohol tinged the air. Rumi wasn't quite sure where to start.

"Wanna do food or games first?" Zoey gripped her hoodie sleeve.

"Whichever is fine with me." Rumi smiled.

"Let's go play that shooter!" Zoey pointed.

"Okay-" Rumi's breath was left behind where she had been standing, unable to keep up with the force of Zoey.

She held the plastic gun in her hand, twisting it lightly and flicking over the screen. Some kind of…zombie hunting game? Zoey aimed at the menu, selecting their game start options.

"Okay you just gotta aim and shoot the zombie when they come at us." Zoey saluted playfully with two fingers, winking with toy gun in hand.

"Got it." Rumi pointed the controller at the screen, tracking the crosshair with her eyes.

The game dropped them in, the volume dramatically increased as hordes of undead lumbered towards them. Zoey aimed with precision, tongue hanging out of the corner of her mouth. Rumi kept up okay, mostly overstimulated by all the blood splatter and loud metal music.

Mira likes this kind of music. Its usually blaring in the gym while she's alone.

She had probably been alone, blaring music, and beating her knuckles open down there for days before Zoey found the stains.

The thought made Rumi's aim sink, the gun dipping slightly with her eyes.

"Ru?" Zoey dropped her controller, prompting a game over screen seconds later. "Hey what's up? Not liking this game?"

"Its not that just.." Rumi set the gun back in its spot on the game.

"Thinking about your girl?" Zoey nudged her.

"She isn't mine though." Her eyes started to sting at the edges.

"I'm not sure about that." Zoey tilted her head. "There's a reason Mira has never dated anyone for long. Mostly hook ups and casual stuff when she needs it. You've always had dibs on first place, whether you knew that or not."

"That can't be the only reason why." Her hands shoved into her hoodie pocket, shoulders inching up.

"Look I'm not trying to like dish out all of Mira's personal stuff, but you need to know that the feelings are mutual between you two." Zoey touched her shoulder. "I'm serious. I have spent all our teen years watching Mira dote on you in her own ways."

"I don't get why though. Especially now." Rumi leaned back against the machine. "All we've done recently is fight. I'm just pent up with all these mixed feelings right now."

"Do you want to talk about them?" Zoey nodded. "Perhaps over disgustingly high priced nachos?"

"Yeah okay." Rumi let out a soft laugh. "Nachos and feelings it is."

"Go grab us a table, I'll order the spread." Zoey pushed her lightly.

Rumi carefully dodged running children and drunken adults alike, making her way to a tucked away table in the corner. As she sat down she pulled out her phone.

No missed calls or texts from Mira.

She pouted, plopping her cheek into her palm as she scrolled her socials. Zoey had been taking her all over the city every day. It was sweet of her to try and cheer her up, but she worried about being too much of a downer all the time. She scrolled until she nearly dropped her phone.

The Calvin Klein stills dropped early from the video they filmed.

Mira was casually leaned back on the hood of some fancy car, jeans unbuttoned and showing off the new boxers she was hired for. She wore a cropped, baggy top and her hair was completely down. She looked…really good. Rumi couldn't help, but linger on her smooth stomach a bit.

She swiped to the next one. This time Mira was only in the logo clad boxers and sports bra. She sat sideways in a lounge chair, legs elegantly crossed as they hung over the edge of one side. Her head was thrown back over the other, hair cascading down and hands up in the front brushing it back. The curve of her ribcage and sharp hip bones on full display. Rumi swallowed hard, suddenly feeling far too warm in her oversized hoodie.

She froze on the next one.

Other models were practically hanging off of Mira, her sitting wide legged in the middle while two gorgeous women had their hands on her. One model had her leg over Mira's thigh, her hand teasing the waistband of the boxers. The other was pressing a manicured hand across her stomach while the other tilted Mira's chin up slightly.

Hands all over Mira.

Other women's hands all over her.

Rumi was fine.

This was fine.

Its just work.

Who cares if instead of being as not okay as Rumi, Mira was half naked with models.

"Uhh…Rumi? You..you good?" Zoey appeared with a tray of food and drinks.

"Fine. Why?" She huffed out.

"Cause you cracked your phone case and you look pissed as fuck?" Zoey sat down slowly.

"What?" She released the tension in her grip she hadn't realized she was using.

Zoey leaned over, plucking the phone from her hands, her eyes went wide.

"Okayy." She drawled out. "So this was a learning experience that you are the jealous type."

"I'm not jealous." Rumi sat back, crossing her arms. "She can have whoever she wants feeling her up on billboards and socials..and videos and…everywhere…"

"This isn't the first time she's had more intimate photo shoots." Zoey handed the phone back. "Do they always bother you this much?"

"Not when Mira was coming home and making us dinner and having couch cuddles after." Rumi pouted. "What if she's off with them havi-…kissing or…whatever."

"Wow you are down bad." Zoey chuckled. "Ru seriously, I'm sure she isn't hooking up with random models right now."

"Then why isn't she home already?" Rumi sniffled, a scowl fighting to stay on her face. "The shoot was yesterday and she hasn't even texted me or called me or.. anything."

"Bobby mentioned lining up other things for her in the same area. She's probably doing that." Zoey fidgeted uncomfortably across from Rumi, not meeting her gaze.

"I really ruined my chance didn't I?" Rumi choked out softly. "She doesn't care about me anymore."

"Rumi no." Zoey reached across the table. "Not true even slightly. I promise you."

"Evidence is pointing differently." Rumi wiped her eyes.

"Want to go home and talk?" Zoey rubbed her hands over Rumi's.

"Y-yeah." Rumi sniffled.

They gathered up their purchases and Zoey lead Rumi out with a comforting arm. The walk to the car felt endless. She hardly noticed them move once her and Zoey were in the backseat of their company car.

She sobbed quietly against the window. Zoey's hand rubbing her shoulder the whole way.

"Let's get upstairs." Zoey ushered her into the elevator. "Get comfy yeah?"

They made it up, Zoey quickly got lights on and tea brewing. Rumi trudged back to her room to change. She shoved the door open.

Her suitcase was in front of the bed.

"Mira?" Rumi called out, turning to go further down the walls.

She jogged down, Zoey peering down now as well. She flung Mira's door open.

Empty.

Just how Rumi had left it this morning.

"Rumi what are you doing?" Zoey rounded the corner, concern knit in her brow.

"My suitcase is here from Celine's..I thought maybe…"

"I just saw a text from Bobby, Mira arranged it be brought for you since she's still working in the city." Zoey rambled, looking off in the distance.

"God I'm pathetic." Rumi collapsed to the floor. "Waiting for her like a lost puppy."

"Hey hey nothing wrong with wanting to see her."

"She doesn't care about seeing me though." Rumi mumbled.

"She does Rums. She's just busy." Zoey offered.

"Sure."

"Come on." Zoey sat next to her. "Talk to me "

Rumi scooched closer, seeking the comforting rubs Zoey had been offering recently.

"Its just…I have this weird blend of feelings about her right now. Part of it is definitely affection. I miss her warmth and she kisses me like…like she needs it to breathe. She makes me feel wanted..and special." Rumi hugged her knees. "But then there's this..bitterness. like I almost feel angry that I'm more of a mess than her and I wanted her to feel upset about me running off."

"That makes sense to me. I don't think she's as okay as she seems, but it makes sense how it's making you feel." Zoey rubbed.

"I don't know if I can hold back when I see her." Rumi cried quietly. "I'm so mad."

"Its okay Ru."

"It doesn't feel okay." She leaned into her maknae.

"I know unnie." Zoey hushed. "I got you."

Later that night, Rumi unpacked to find that all of her clothes had been washed and folded.

Except Mira's hoodie she added in.

7 days after Rumi returned to the penthouse..

Rumi rolled over in bed as sunlight poured directly into her puffy, red eyes. Her hand slapped around her bed to see if she could convince Zoey to make breakfast. The reply was fast.

Zozo: There's already breakfast out on the counter. Good luck

"Good luck?' Rumi rumbled.

She staggered out of bed, Mira's hoodie snug to her hips. The sleeves stretched past the length of her arms. She rubbed her eyes of sleep as their living room came into view. The smell of pancakes wafted in the air, melodic music echoing out.

Mira.

Rumi stopped short in the doorway of the living area. Breakfast was laid out across the island counter, Mira sat at the table gently plucking pomegranate seeds out of the ruby fruit. The sun rays caught in her hair, bathing each rose tinted strand in gold. Her glasses were resting perfectly in place on her sloped nose. She looked good. Really good.

Her hands were so delicate with each small gem she removed from the fruit. Not a single one broken and leaving juice. She looked so incredibly soft in this moment. Rumi's heart leapt into her throat. What she wouldn't give to just drop all the pain and settle into Mira's lap.

Rumi stepped out tentatively.

Mira looked up with a warmth and hesitation.

"Hey pretty girl." Her voice was honey sweet and quiet as she moved to stand.

She had so much in her head. She wanted to scream and shout at her, but Mira's soft lips were an arms reach away. She wanted her embrace and her apology and her care. She wanted to apologize and sooth and kiss Mira and tell her she loves her.

But bitter tastes are always the hardest to get rid of.

"You were gone so long." Rumi sniffled.

"I know Ru. I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to be." Her voice was soft, timid even.

"Why didn't you call or text all?"

"I d-." Mira seemed to choke back her reply. "I'm sorry."

""Is that it?" Rumi scoffed. "We have a huge fight and I run off a-and you can just show up a week later making pancakes like nothing was wrong?"

"Rumi I-"

"No!" Rumi cut her off. "No, you've been gone all week without a word. I teleported away and you didn't even check if I was okay! You didn't call Zoey back or text us or anything."

"I.. I'm sorry." Her eyes cast downward.

"Stop just apologizing!" Rumi urged. "Shout, get mad at me, do literally anything. You're never this subdued."

"I don't want to shout at you." Her voice was barely audible.

"You should be mad at me." Rumi sobbed out. "I ran away and said hurtful things a-and I-"

"Come here." Mira said firmly.

Her arms slipped around Rumi's heaving shoulders, pulling her flush against Mira's warm front. Rumi's arms instinctively shot around her waist, gripping her shirt in her fists.

"Why are you so okay?" Rumi heaved. "Why are you running around working and making breakfast like it's nothing? But I've been stuck sobbing and panicking every second you're gone and feeling so angry. Its not fair. I've been here feeling like a terrible person because I wanted you to be hurt by me leaving and you're just opening fruit like you have all the time in the world."

"I'm not okay Rumi." Mira tried to adjust to see her, Rumi buried deeper. "You..you left me behind and I was worried sick."

Rumi shoved them apart, a low boil building in her cheeks. That bitter bile threatening to rise in her throat.

"Worried sick enough to not call? Worried sick enough to be at a photo shoot getting felt up by beautiful women instead of here with me?"

Mira seemed to tense tightly. Her eyes shifted ever so faintly. Rumi pressed harder.

"Suddenly you have nothing to say?" Rumi scoffed. "

Mira paused a moment, seemingly on the brink of falling apart. She awkwardly shuffled, gripping her arm with hand. She swallowed hard, hand coming up to the back of her neck as if reaching for something.

"I wanted to be here with you." Mira murmured.

"Then why weren't you?!" Rumi rasped. "Why did you stay away from me? You didn't come home, you didn't check in, I-..do you hate me now? Did I ruin this too?"

"Rumi, no never." Mira rushed forward, taking Rumi's cheek tenderly in her hand. "I'm so sorry I've been away. There was a reason I promise you, but that reason was never your fault Rumi."

"Why won't you just tell me?" Rumi rubbed her face into the touch. "Why hide away from me?"

"Seriously?" A slight edge returned to her voice, familiar, storming. "You're lecturing me on keeping secrets?"

"Well I.." Rumi stuttered. "I'm sorry I just figured that if I wasn't allowed to have secrets anymore that..you wouldn't too, but…I guess I thought wrong."

"I never said you weren't allowed secrets I just asked you not to lie to my face anymore." Her volume increased such a faint amount. "I am not lying to you. There is a reason I stayed away, that is the truth. I just don't yet want to say what." Mira strained against composure.

"I'm trying Mira." Rumi felt the tears burn her cheeks. "I really am it's just hard to break the habit that protected me for so long. I'm just asking for the time and patience I need to-"

"I have always been patient with you." Mira retorted. "I have always given you space until I worried you were hurting and alone."

"You pushed me. You were patient until you wanted answers you weren't owed. Coming to my room, pressing me on the train, always wanting me to give you everything."

"I was worried you were hurting yourself and not asking for help Rumi!" Mira finally spat. "I watched you wear more and more layers over the years and I thought-"

"I was fine."

"No you weren't Rumi!" Mira roared. "You were scared and lonely and I just sat around waiting."

"I've never been more lonely than this week!" Rumi screamed back. "I have slept cold and alone every night since I learned what it was like to have someone share a bed with you!"

Mira took a deep breath, exhaling fully. "I have too Rumi."

"Oh I'm sure your model friends would keep your bed warm." Rumi hissed.

Mira leaned back to her full height, eyes suddenly soft and glassy. Her bottom lip quivered ever so faintly.

"..is that what you think of me?" Mira whispered.

Rumi suddenly felt a deep wave of guilt in the pit of her stomach. Mira turned and walked towards the elevator.

"Where are you going?" Rumi called after her.

"I need a minute." She choked out. "I'll be back later."

"Coward." Rumi barely let out under her breath.

Mira stopped in place.

"I know." The words left her like paper ripping.

She vanished past the elevator doors, leaving Rumi alone again. Rumi collapsed at the table, head pulling forward into her hands as choked cries poured out of her. Why did she always do this? Why couldn't she just let go?

"I uh..heard yelling.." Zoey muttered from behind her. "I'm guessing y'all didn't make out and make up then."

"No. I fucked it up again." Rumi shook her head. "She was even trying to stay calm and I got the rise out of her because I couldn't handle how tender she is to me when I don't deserve it."

"I need to be honest about something." Zoey sat next to her. "In regards to what I heard.'

Rumi turned her salt stained eyes to Zoey, lip shaking. She moved herself closer.

"Mira did check on you..every day.. multiple times a day…with me." Zoey admitted carefully.

"What?" Rumi snapped up, voice cracking.

"Since day one." Zoey sniffled. "She called me back after you had gone to bed."

"W-why didn't she say anything?" Rumi coughed out. "She j-just stood there while I screamed at her a-and-"

"That's my fault I asked her not to say anything." Zoey heaved out. "I didn't want to get caught in the middle and I asked her for a selfish request that ended up getting her more hurt. I'm so sorry Rumi."

"I need to find her." Rumi stood, moving towards the elevator. "I was awful and I need to apologize."

"Can I come too?" Zoey muttered.

"Please." Rumi sniffled. "I think she needs us both right now."

Zoey followed her into the elevator, the weight of their conversation on Rumi's shoulders made her feel as though the floor would plummet out beneath her. Her heart pounded in her throat, unwilling to be swallowed back down into her chest. She needed to find her.

The streets were relatively empty this time of morning. Rumi jogged ahead, scanning for any signs of Mira, begging for any pull of the Honmoon towards her.

None came.

"Mira!" She screamed out.

No answer.

"Mira please!"

Nothing.

She ran forward into a side street, scanning for pink hair in the small crowds. Not a pop of color was seen in the inky wave of dark haired people. Zoey stayed close, hands to her chest nervously.

"She couldn't have gone far right?" Zoey offered.

"I don't know." Rumi shook.

"Hey hey." Zoey hugged her close, her citrus perfume overriding her anxieties ever so slightly. "We'll find her, or she'll come home. We can wait for her. Just like we always waited for you."

"Y-yeah okay." Rumi wiped her eyes with Mira's long sleeve. "Maybe you should go back. I'll keep looking for a bit."

"Are you sure?"

"I just want to look a little more, but I want to know if she comes home." Rumi nodded. "Can you check her room and the gym?"

"Yes of course." Zoey touched her shoulders. "Be safe?"

"I will."

"I trust you." Zoey nodded, the words carrying more weight for Rumi than she probably realized.

"Thank you Zo." She gripped her hands, letting them slide off her shoulders as she leapt up the side of the buildings.

Rumi scanned below for Mira. She's always been faster that Mira so even if she got far, she wouldn't stay that way. People littered the busier street below, shopping and cycling through the crowds. None of them were the one her heart grasped for.

"Where are you?" Rumi breathed out.

She climbed and hopped higher still.

Please be somewhere close. Do not have gone far from me again.

Please come home to my heart and let me hold yours properly, tenderly, achingly.

"Any luck?" Zoey stood from the couch as Rumi finally returned.

"No." Rumi flopped face first into their couch.

"You need to rest and eat." Zoey moved towards the kitchen. "You've been out there for hours."

"Yeah." Rumi sniffled into the couch.

"Want some pancakes? I can heat them up."

"Sure." Rumi mumbled.

She let her eyes drift closed, tears slipping out like water over rocks. She nails scratched the couch beneath her, desperate for anything grounding.

Mira was her ground. The steady surface she fell too. Any water she found herself drowning in became shallow when she was near, giving her a place her feet could touch.

Her ground was crumbling away from her and she wielded the hammer smashing it apart.

"Here." The sweet smell of Mira's cooking filled her nose as Zoey held the plate out. "She even cut up strawberries the way you like."

"Extra thin." Rumi chuckled, sitting up.

She poked at the fluffy, warm cake and fruit. Her chest bloomed at the taste, so inherently cinnamon spiced and sweet maple mixed into the batter—exactly how Mira always made them. Rumi felt her shoulders release for the first time today, only as the sun is setting and the taste of warmth spread across her tongue.

"Feeling better?" Zoey rubbed her leg.

"Yes actually." Rumi smiled softly. "Why did I have to push her this morning?

"You were feeling a lot of things Ru."

"But I didn't need to be so mean. So bitter." Rumi's smile faded. "If I had another chance I'd have come out and hugged her, eaten breakfast together, talked to her in a more gentle manner. Maybe then we'd be curled up on the couch together instead of having no idea where she is."

"Rumi." Zoey soothed.

"No…no I did everything w-wrong again. I've spent all this time telling her everything she did wrong. I didn't..check on her either. I didn't reach out a-and tell her I was okay. I just got mad that she didn't do the same." Rumi blubbered.

"Oh Rumi." Zoey hugged her close.

"W-why can't I chose right?" Rumi wailed into Zoey's shoulder. "I chose w-wrong to hide my patterns….I chose wrong with J-Jinu..I broke Mira's h-heart."

"Rumi it's going to be okay." Zoey cradled her close. "Mira will come home. She always does."

"What if this is the first time she doesn't?" Rumi sobbed.

"I don't believe that one bit." Zoey brushed Rumi's hair back.

Rumi felt the Honmoon tear and ripple out.

Demons clawing through the new barrier.

"Oh for fucks sake." Zoey groaned. "Will you be okay to move?"

"Never better." Rumi stood. "We need to go."

They ran out full sprint, following the ripples like drips on steady water. Rumi's thoughts ran faster than her legs could as they crossed rooftops.

Please be okay.

Please be okay.

Please..

They crashed into the alleyway, demons flocking around limp bodies left on the ground, sinking slowly through the Honmoon down below to their new tyrant.

"There's…so many.." Zoey exhaled, tossing Shin-kal rapidly through a crowd of them.

"We can do this." Rumi summoned her newer sword, heavier than she had gotten used to.

But she was strong.

She had to be.

"Zoey take out as many smaller demons as you can. I'll start on the bigger ones." Rumi commanded, her tone of leadership returned to her after days of pathetic whimpering alone.

"On it Unnie!" Zoey sprang forward.

If Mira was her storm than Zoey was the lighting. The way she flew through them in flashes and swift blinks of movement. Knives flying through demons and carving small pathways along patterned bodies that dissolve into magenta particles and smoke.

Her sword was heavy, cleaving, and brutal. Gone was her speed and precision, replaced now with brute strength unfamiliar to her. She felt a pull and burn in her shoulders with each swing, the fatigue of today becoming more prevalent to her. They thinned the numbers quickly, reducing them to one small crowd. Zoey off to one side, Rumi to the other.

"Rumi! There's a huge tear!" Zoey shrieked.

Rumi looked up at the ripple, a much larger creature clawing its way out with sick, twisting movements.

Its tusks curled wickedly past its serpentine head, multiple eyes trained on Rumi as clawed hands tore through the Honmoon. The dense thud as it landed only to immediately bolt towards Rumi. She raised her blade flat in front of her, launched backwards with the force of its bladed blow.

"Shit." She kicked off the brick wall behind her.

Her arms strained, but the blade did not lift. Buried partially in the ground from the force. She yanked as hard as she could to no avail.

The creature barreled down, fangs gnawing at the air and hooked claws flailing.

No no no no no no.

She pulled harder.

"Fuck." She cried out, her patterns flaring as she tried to will herself the strength to do anything.

The next thing she felt was warmth.

An arm, around her waist.

Her back pressed into a taller shell around her like armor.

The smell of incense and orchid petals.

"Mira?" She barely choked out.

In moments like this, time typically felt slow motion. As if a chance to change things could be offered by some higher power.

This was not how this felt.

It was too fast.

Too loud.

Too violent.

She felt everything all at once, so quickly she could hardly process what had happened.

She heard Zoey scream.

Against her back, through Mira's body, she felt the vulgar, wet strikes. Rapid. Vicious. Her head would have bashed against the wall from the force had it not been for Mira's arm separating the two surfaces. The thuds rippled into her body, softened from Mira's.

She heard a crack..felt it.

Mira's breath gasp out of her.

The thrashing beast stopped.

It only took seconds.

She could see the particles falling over then like dark snow. Zoey's rapid footfall behind them as she yelled.. something..

What was she saying?

Mira's body went lax over her, draped like a blanket, barely clinging to her waist. Her warm voice exhaled into her ear.

"You…okay?" She croaked out, voice both wet and drowning.

The wet slop that hit the ground behind her was a sound that would haunt her.

It only took seconds.

Rumi turned around, met with Mira eye to eye she was so hunched over. Her normally vibrant crimson tinted brown eyes were dull. Her breathing was ragged and dripping red down her lips.

It only took seconds.

"Mira..Mira!" Rumi scrambled to collect her torso in her arms. "No no no no no.."

Zoey stared wide eyes behind them, hand over her mouth as tears flowed in a downpour.

"Mira please stay awake!" Rumi felt her throat burn. "I have you, please please don't go!"

Mira choked out something, words not able to form properly on her gashed face and neck.

Then Rumi felt the blood on her back. The sickening sensation of shredded flesh tangling itself around her hands.

It only took seconds.

Too much blood.

It only took seconds.

The ground was a maroon lake at her feet.

It only took seconds.

"Zoey help me!" A strained version of her own voice tore out, desperate.

"Oh god." Zoey cried, propping Mira's arm up as both of them quickly became familiar with the wetness of Mira's ichor.

"Zoey what do we do I-I can't think." Rumi choked out rapidly.

"W-well we need to get the bleeding stopped. We need to get home."

"Zoey I can't breathe." Rumi panted.

"I know, I know Ru." She tugged Mira higher. "Do you think you can teleport us?"

"I-I don't k-know I can't concentrate." Rumi could hardly keep her breath in.

"We can't carry her that far she'll bleed out." Zoey pulled to lean Mira against the wall.

Rumi gripped onto Mira, her scarlet blood coating her hands completely. Her eyes half open, fluttering.

"Please no." Rumi whispered, cupping Mira's in tact cheek with a coagulated hand.

A blue glow behind her, purring and soft.

"Derpy." She breathed. "Hey boy."

Zoey stepped back, unsure of what to do with a giant blue tiger.

"What the fuck Rumi?.." she breathed out.

"I'll explain later." She turned to look at the tiger. "Can you get her home with us?"

He tilted his head, nudging Mira's hand. She groaned weakly, a dark stain growing against the wall. The glowing, soft creature turned, flattening his back for them.

Rumi carefully lowered Mira across her lap as she mounted the tiger, Zoey snuggled into her back. Mira's head bobbed into her neck, her long legs limp over Rumi's thigh.

"You're gonna be okay Mir." Rumi held her tight.

Derpy bounced upward smooth and light, rippling the Honmoon with efficiency she had never seen in him before. Zoey clawed into her stomach, squeezing against Rumi. She was shaking. Mira coughed a splatter onto Rumi's neck with a wretched, pained hack.

"I got you baby, it's okay." Rumi stroked her pink hair, pressing a gentle kiss into her temple. "You're gonna be okay. You have to be."

"I see the tower." Zoey mumbled into Rumi's shoulder.

"We're almost home Mira. W-we'll fix you up." Rumi cooed into Mira's hair.

Derpy bounced into the living space of the top floor, sliding gently until bumping up next to the kitchen island. Zoey hopped off first.

"Okay I need to get towels and the med kits, just..hold her there a sec and we'll get her laid down." Zoey stumbled running down the hall.

Rumi cradled Mira's body close, the blood soaking through every layer of her. Her body felt colder.

That was wrong.

Mira never felt cold.

"Mira? C-can you hear me?" Rumi tilted her head up slightly with a delicate press of fingers to jaw.

Mira nodded faintly, reaching with blood fingers towards Rumi's braid.

"I'm so sorry." Rumi gushed, tears falling. "This is all my fault I'm so so sorry Mira."

"…no." Mira groaned weakly.

"I should never have said all those horrible things." Rumi sobbed, holding their foreheads together.

"..shhh….s'okay." Mira croaked out.

"You're not a coward Mira." Rumi kissed her forehead. "You're so wonderful and I'll do anything for you to stay….please stay with me."

Zoey sprang in, arms overflowing. She threw the towels in layers over the counter top. Popping open the large med kit reserved for serious injuries that Celine had built.

"Okay let's…let's get her up…on her stomach." Zoey panted, absent-mindedly running her drenched hands through her hair.

"O-okay." Rumi kissed Mira's temple one more time, rubbing her thumb over it.

Together, they carefully lifted and lowered Mira onto the counter. She collapsed forward with a groan, suddenly more awake from the pain. Zoey set out various bottle and clean cloths and syringes around their workspace. Rumi kept close to Mira's side, ushering comforts to her when she reacted in pain. Derpy curled in the corner of the room, watching patiently.

"We need to get her shirt off." Zoey scanned the area. "We'll probably have to cut it."

"Okay." Rumi nodded.

Zoey carefully peeled away the fabric, snipping at it gently. Mira let out a half yell in pain when the fabric pulled on her shredded back.

"I know baby, I know." Rumi soothed.

"Oh god." Zoey retched into the sink behind her from the gruesome sight.

"You okay?" Rumi called over.

"Should..should we call Celine?" Zoey sobbed, trying to keep her eyes clear with her arm.

"I'll…I'll get her.." Rumi gritted.

"Do you think you can?" Zoey returned with a bowl of warm water.

"I have to." She bit her lip. "I'll be right back."

She kissed Mira's knuckles, standing and letting the torn up arm rest against the counter top. She steeled herself, picturing Celine as clearly as her adrenaline worn mind could manage.

She suddenly smelled incense.

Celine stood abruptly, dropping her cup to the floor with a start. Her eyes narrowed.

"R-Rumi?" She stepped closer.

Rumi hadn't really considered the fact that she'd be appearing out of nowhere absolutely covered in blood.

"M-mom." Rumi cried, staggering forward.

"Oh my little lilac." Celine caught her, bloody body and all. "What happened?"

"M-Mira, she's really hurt." Rumi rambled out, clinging to Celine. "P-please we need help."

"Alright let me grab supplies. What kind of wounds Rumi?" Celine moved swiftly to her closet.

"Gashes..really big ones….all over her left side."

"What happened?" Celine gathered supplies into a large duffle bag, sweeping shelves clear.

"She p-protected me.." Rumi sniffled. "Threw herself over me when a demon lunged at me."

"I see." Celine reached high for some bags of clear liquid. "Has she lost a lot of blood?"

"Yes."

"Is she conscious?"

"She was when I left. She's fighting." Rumi felt Celine's presence and knowledge steady her.

"Good. We need to keep her that way." Celine zipped the bag. "Ready."

Rumi took Celine's hand, calloused and calming. Her thoughts rapidly pictured Mira, bloody and torn. She shook her head, squinting. She must picture something sweeter.

Mira's crinkled eyes when she smiles and laughs for real.

Her gentle hands sewing the hole in Zoey's sweater.

How it feels to sleep surrounded by her.

There were screams when they arrived.

Mira was gripping the counter top, towel held between her teeth as Zoey dabbed at the freshly mopped up wounds with sterile solution.

Mira screamed in agony, her back tensing under the stinging liquid, muffled by the towel she bit down through. Celine moved quickly to assess her.

"My god." She pulled up her sleeves, rolling them and tying her hair back.

"I tried to clean it as best I could Celine." Zoey cried out, hands trembling.

"You did wonderful Zoey. My brave girl." Celine affirmed. "Rumi come here."

"Yes I'm here." Rumi moved forward, pressing her hand over Mira's.

"Set up the local anesthetic syringes for me, in my bag." She nodded.

Rumi practically ripped the bag open, screwing the needle in place and priming it as Celine had taught her. She carried it over to her.

"Inject it here." She pointed the the heavy cluster of sinew and tattered skin at Mira's shoulder. "Prepare 3 more syringes after."

"Okay okay." She breathed to herself, pressing the needle till she felt the small pop of the muscle.

"Zoey can you prepare the suture kit for me?" Celine looked up.

"Yes I got it." Zoey turned around, opening a smaller case at the other counter.

Rumi injected each syringe one after the other, exactly where Celine directed her too. Celine was surgical, clean, and efficient. Mira broke apart the procedure with occasional grunts and cries of pain. Zoey brought over the needle and suture thread.

"I'll need you both to help me line up the skin so I can sew it back correctly. Wash your hands." Celine looked between them.

They both nodded, moving to the sink. Zoey went first, leaving Rumi unable to tear her eyes away from Mira. She watched her back rise and fall steadily as the numbing agent took hold. Seeing her torn apart had tied a string around Rumi's lungs, keeping her breathes shallow.

"Here." Zoey tapped her, hands cleaned now, handing her the soap bar.

Rumi took it, lathering under warm water until it ran clear. She staggered back over to the counter where Zoey was pressing edges together like a morbid quilt of muscle and skin.

"That's perfect Zoey." Celine nodded, running the needle through steadily. "Rumi?"

"Here." She coughed out.

"Do you feel steady enough to stitch?" Celine kept her eyes trained on the bleeding skin.

"Y-yes…yes." Rumi took her first deep breath.

"Start on her face, then her arm while I finish her back and neck."

"Okay."

Rumi kicked a stool over, perching next to Mira's head. Her eyes were closed, breath steady. Rumi brushed her hair out of her face. Those mahogany eyes fluttered open, dazed and seeking.

"..Ru-" she started to cough blood.

"Hey hey hey easy." Rumi shushed her, thumb circling her temple.

"The Honmoon will help with the internal damage once we seal these lacerations." Celine comforted.

"Her connection is strong enough again?" Rumi turned to face her.

"Its the strongest it has ever been." Celine paused only a second as she smiled fondly.

Rumi nodded, turning back to face Mira. The scratches on her face were far less deep than the rest. A few of them she could even just butterfly clip and bandage. She was careful with her stitching, pulling the soft skin of her pretty face as close to how it was as she could.

She moved back and forth, grabbing the butterfly strips and bandages and thread until Mira was half a mummy. Finally once her back was done, Celine and Rumi lifted her torso while Zoey wrapped it.

It had taken them 2 hours and 17 minutes to sew her back together as best they could.

"Okay." Celine wiped her forehead with her arm. "That's all we can do tonight. We can move her to her room."

"Derpy?" Rumi whistled.

"Der- oh?!" Celine startled, moving back as the large cat stalked over.

"Um so..this is Derpy. He's some kind of spirit..he was Jinu's…there's also a bird.."

"A bird?" Zoey raised a brow.

"..with a tiny hat." Rumi mumbled.

"With a..tiny hat." Celine echoed.

"Well anyways let's uh…let's get her on the tiger." Rumi cleared her throat.

They carefully shifted Mira to Derpy's back. She gritted her teeth gruffly, body tensing with the movement. The tiger took soft, gentle strides alongside Rumi to Mira's room.

Rumi could hear Celine and Zoey's muffled conversation behind her, the dark hallway stretching out ahead of her. Mira's room was as she left it from when she last slept here, bed slightly unmade. She adjusted the pillows and blankets to make a spot for Mira on her stomach, head turned slightly.

"There we go." Rumi cooed. "You're safe. I got you. I got you Mira."

Mira's breathing was unwavering, faint. Sleep seemed to take her.

"I promise I'll be here when you wake up." Rumi smiled weakly. "I'll be the first person you see."

Rumi felt fresh tears adorn her cheeks once more. Mira's sharp features, softened by exhaustion, were all she could see through her blurred vision.

"I'm gonna get cleaned up and fresh clothes." She scratched Mira's scalp. "Then I'll come lay down okay? I'll be back as quick as possible. I'll ask Celine and Zoey to watch you though so you don't get lonely."

She stood, Derpy laid next to Mira's bed as sentinel, Sussie flew in the open balcony door and perched just above Mira's head on her headboard. Two guardians at Rumi's unspoken behest.

"All settled in?" Zoey called to her.

"Yeah. Can one of you stay with her while I get changed and shower though?" Rumi let her own exhaustion tinge her voice.

"I will. I want to set up an IV bag for her anyways. Try and keep her hydrated and replenish the blood she lost." Celine nodded. "Zoey you should clean up too."

"That sounds good." She nodded, eyes puffy.

Rumi is unsure how long she stood in the shower, watching the water faded clear of blood, dirt, and tears. She scrubbed till her skin became raw and sensitive, desperate to remove the memory of the sticky, thick blood caked through every layer of her. The steam circled her, hot water soaking through to her aching muscles. Her own herbal shampoo scent filled the space. The bloody clothes, Mira's bloody hoodie, stared back at her from the pile she had made. She blinked heavily, sleep clawing at her.

"How was your shower?" Celine turned as she opened the door.

"Nice. I'm just really tired now."

Mira had been rolled onto her right side, bandages facing upward now. The IV drip in the back of her hand followed a tube that was clipped to her bedside lamp. Rumi didn't even care that Celine was there. She crawled under the blanket in front of Mira, tucking herself carefully under her bandaged arm. Her forehead pressed against the layers of white gauze wrapping Mira's chest. Rumi felt the blanket get pulled higher over them.

"Get some rest my dear." Celine soothed. "I'll come in a few hours to change the IV bag."

"You can sleep in my room." Rumi mumbled from Mira's chest.

"Thank you. Do you need anything?"

"Just wanna sleep here." She shifted up, nuzzling into Mira's neck.

"Alright dear." Celine patted her head, did the same to Mira, and flipped the lights off on her way out.

In the darkness, Rumi tucked in as close as she could without grabbing at Mira's bad side. The heartbeat against her cheek thrummed strong, consistent.

She was okay.

Mira was going to be okay.

Rumi pressed a soft kiss just below Mira's jaw, nuzzling her with the bridge of her nose after.

"I'm sorry." She whispered into Mira's now again warm skin.

Celine took in the bareness of Rumi's space. Her old teddy bear, a few pops of color, but overall just..quite drab compared to the other girls. She touched a plant on the night stand fondly.

"Hm." She chuckled. "Like mother, like daughter."

Her mind drew her back to Mira, who for all purposes was another daughter to her, and how fragile she looked. After the week she's had.

Celine is hopeful it won't be too much.

Mira was already so close to breaking only days prior. She couldn't witness that again.