Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

II gazed out at the sea, the cool water nipping at his ankles. It was grey and cloudy, the wind picking up every now and then. The weather had been the same on that day too. The day he had lost his boyfriend, the day he lost Vessel.

He thought they’d been steady, that Vessel was okay, but he had been wrong. Frantically arriving at the beach all too late. They never found his body. II lost a piece of himself that day, a part of his soul forever gone.

He didn’t like the beach, he didn’t like the sea. And yet..

“Papa!” A small voice called, a pair of small hands latching onto the Omega’s shirt. 

II looked down and smiled, reaching a hand down to brush back his daughter’s hair. 

“What is it, love? I thought you and Tommy were making sandcastles.” He said softly.

The little girl smiled wide in response, “Tommy is but I’m starving ‘n you promised to eat here!”

He chuckled softly. “Alright, alright. I’ll go get the sandwiches out then, you go fetch your brother, okay?”

She giggled and nodded, immediately running towards Tommy, her twin brother.

---

Sarah and Tommy. Twins.

A few weeks after Vessel’s death, the loss of his Alpha’s presence, he had near constant morning sickness, back pain and a noticeable change in his scent. II had been devastated upon the first realization he was pregnant with Vessel’s pups. He was alone and expecting. It was a vulnerability II never quite came to terms with, he didn’t even know how he made it through the long months, until the twins came into the world, but he had ultimately survived.

And oh, how they reminded him of Vessel. He saw it in Sarah’s green eyes, in the way Tommy took after him completely, save for II’s blue eyes.

From the moment he felt them in his arms, he knew he made the right decision in having them. It was hard work, it was exhausting but he loved his pups. He knew Vessel would’ve wanted him to keep going so he did. Over five years since Vessel was gone and II wouldn’t trade his children for anything.

Little over five years since his drum kit went into storage, almost six years since Vessel’s death and the upending of II’s life, and today, the twins’ birthday. Which, of course, they insisted on going to the beach regardless of the weather. They loved the sea, as had Vessel, and II, who could never say no to Vessel, couldn’t deny his kids that.

---

He managed to look away from the vast sea and tread back onto the shore, towards the large blanket on the sand, beside Sarah and Tommy’s sandcastles. A rather vast amount of sandcastles actually. He hummed, sitting down next to the picnic basket on the blanket, opening it to pull out several wrapped sandwiches, a couple little crisp baggies, juice boxes for the twins and water for II.

“Okay, you two, I thought you said you were hungry.”

Both of them came happily over, sitting across from their father. He handed them each a wrapped sandwich, a crisp bag and a juice box. Sarah preferred grape juice but Tommy preferred apple juice more. II noted the differences and similarities between them, and in an effort to make sure their small household ran smoothly, he did whatever he had to keep the twins happy. Even if it meant he kept two different types of juice boxes in the pantry, or made two different sandwiches for them to eat.

The lunch was a happy one and eventually it was getting colder, so II decided to call it a day and decided to bring the kids back home. They packed up the picnic basket, took pictures of the various sandcastles made, rolled up the blanket they sat on and put on their shoes before heading towards the bus station to take them home.

The rest of the evening was a blur to II as they watched movies, ate dinner, ate the birthday cake he had prepared the night before, and as he tucked the twins into each of their beds.

He closed their bedroom door quietly, letting his emotions bubble to the surface. He pressed his forehead against their door, breath hitching quietly. Five years since he had the twins and Vessel would never know his children. It stung. Tears formed in his eyes. It stung. He never truly mourned Vessel, nor accepted his death nor dealt with the emotions that came with all of that. How could he? He was so…busy. Two kids, a job, chores around the apartment. He only had himself to rely on, and he refused to burden the twins with any of it. They were children. He was an adult. He would not let his pups endure the childhood he had endured.

He took a deep breath, blinking the tears away as he pulled back and headed towards his own bedroom. He shucked off his jeans, grabbing a pair of black sweats and sliding them on instead. He crawled onto the bed, falling onto his back with a groan. Cold sheets, a cold bed. The same mattress he had slept on with Vessel back when they first moved into this very apartment. He curled up on his side, closing his eyes.

Tomorrow was another day.

---

II blinked and glanced down at what he was doing. Oh. The dishes. He was scrubbing the breakfast plates and rinsing them. Pancakes were their usual Sunday routine. He’d let them spend the morning watching cartoons in their pajamas, before insisting they get dressed so they could head to the park and get some energy out before lunch. It was hard keeping two five year olds entertained but he managed far better than he had ever expected.

A sudden knock at the door startled II out of his thoughts and he frowned. They never got visitors. II didn’t really have friends and he had all but shut his family away when he moved out. Wearily, he turned off the sink and dried his hands, tossing the dish towel over his shoulder as he headed to the door.

He told Sarah and Tommy to stay where they were as he unlocked the door and slowly opened it. He opened his mouth to speak but any words got stuck in his throat when he saw who was standing outside his door. His eyes widened and it felt like all the air got knocked out of his lungs.

“Vessel..?”

Chapter Text

II couldn’t believe his eyes. He was sure he was hallucinating, that he had finally gone mad. There was no way Vessel was in front of him right now. He was dead. Gone. He swallowed hard, taking a step back.

“Vessel, you’re…you’re supposed to be dead…” He blurted out before he could stop the words from leaving his mouth.

Vessel seemed to wince at that. He looked almost sheepish, standing there in nothing more than a windbreaker, jeans and a shirt. He still looked the same, as if almost six years hadn’t passed. As if he hadn’t gone off and drowned himself in the ocean. The taller swallowed hard and took a deep breath, as if trying to gather his thoughts.

“I…have a lot of explaining to do, I know that. Just…I am here, II. It’s me, I’ve come back. I know it’s a lot but please believe me.” 

His scent was so familiar, a scent he had almost forgotten. Even his voice matched Vessel’s. II’s entire world was flipped upside down and he couldn’t even begin where to think or start. His boyfriend, the father of his children, was right there. In front of him. Breathing and alive, completely not dead.

Raw panic and anxiety filled II in such a way, a way he had only known before back when he realized he was too late in saving Vessel.

“I don’t…you…you’re supposed to be dead, I was at the beach, there was no body, you just..” He was trying hard not to just..implode. Tears started to fill his eyes. “You can’t be real, you…you’re not really here, you can’t be..”


Vessel shifted nervously, taking a step forward. 

“Please, II, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, it’s me, I promise. I know a lot happened, please. I’ll tell you everything, I just-”

A soft voice cut Vessel off and both he and II looked down at where Tommy was standing, tiny hands clinging to his father’s hoodie, pressed close. Sarah stood not too far behind, more curious than anything.

“Papa, who’s this?” Tommy asked quietly, staring at Vessel with those big blue eyes he had gained from II.

II took a deep breath, gently stroking his son’s hair.


“Papa will explain later, why don’t you and your sister go watch your cartoons, hm? I promise we’ll talk more, love.” He said gently.

The little boy looked between Vessel and II before nodding and going back to his sister. The twins glanced at their father and the strange man there before returning back to sitting on their blanket and watching Sunday cartoons.

II let out a long, tired sigh. He ran a hand through his hair.

Vessel blinked and slowly looked at II. “Pups? You…you had pups? And they’re…”

II nodded, crossing his arms and closing his eyes as Vessel let the news sink in.


“Yes, Vessel, they’re yours.” He bit his lip. “Ours. Uh, just turned five yesterday.” He explained. “You…you’ve missed a lot..”

Vessel nodded slowly, a guilty look in his eyes as II explained everything. Kids. Twins. And they were his. “II, I…if I had known, I wouldn’t have..” He trailed off.

The other shook his head. 

“I didn’t even know myself until weeks after your death. Neither of us would’ve known.”

The Omega glanced back inside, hesitating. “You…can come in, then. Since the kids know you’re here.” He took a deep breath. “I’ll make us some coffee and you..” 

He looked at Vessel, eyes softening as he took him all in. It was a lot for anyone to handle, to deal with.

“You can explain everything to me. From the beginning.” He finished, opening the door a bit more.

The Alpha nodded and slowly entered, looking around and taking it all in as he followed II to the small kitchen. If this was any normal situation, II would’ve found Vessel’s presence and scent comfortable, inviting even. Now, it felt strange. Foreign even. So many emotions he had tried to push away but Vessel was back. The one Alpha that II would’ve dedicated his entire life to was now standing in their- his..kitchen. A ghost. 

II made two cups of coffee on instinct, brain on auto-pilot as he tried to gauge how exactly Vessel was standing before him. He tapped his fingers against the counter before picking up one of the mugs and handing it to the other. He took his own mug into his hand and took a scalding sip, ignoring the way it burned his tongue. He just needed that distraction.

“So..” II started, looking at Vessel pointedly.

Vessel cleared his throat.


“So, you were right. I did die. I did…kill myself that day, but I..” He licked his lips. “When I woke up, I was in this…other world and there was this goddess, named Sleep. She told me she would bring me back, back to life, if I agreed to be her First, a vessel for her. I agreed, only time passed so fast here. It was only a couple months in her world but when I came back here, nearly five years had passed. I…I didn’t know it’d take so long, I went to find you immediately.” 

Vessel looked at II apologetically. “I’m so…so sorry, II, really, I wanted to come back. I had to come back and see you.”


II didn’t know what to make of this. A goddess named Sleep? It was a lot to take in, and it sounded so unreal, yet why did it sound like Vessel was telling the truth? He truly didn’t know what to believe. He was so overwhelmed, he was drained. Everything was a lot right now.

“I..feel like I failed, Vessel. You died that day and..I lost you, I lost everything.” He looked down at his coffee. “Five years I thought you were dead, thinking I failed to protect you, that if I had just known sooner, I could’ve stopped you.”

Vessel’s gaze softened and a small silence washed over them for a moment before the Alpha spoke up again.


“It wasn’t you, II. You never failed, it was never your fault. You did everything you could, I promise.” He set his mug on the counter. “I came back to explain to you, to see you again. I missed you so much.” He looked towards the living room. “Do the kids know? About…me?”

The Omega took a long sip of his coffee and gave a small nod. “Tommy and Sarah. Those are their names and they do. Sort of.” His brows furrowed and he bit his lip as he thought of what to say.

“They know about you being their father but they think you’ve gone. That you just…were gone one day. I think they know the topic makes me sad so…they don’t really ask.” II murmured.

That made Vessel’s heart at the thought.

“II, I-”

II cut him off, “Do you want to meet them? Your pups?” He finally asked. 

A pause, as Vessel took in the question. A nod followed and II nodded in return, setting his mug down. 

He gestured for the other to follow him into the living room, where the kids immediately turned their attention to their father, waiting patiently to see what he was going to say, and if he was going to introduce the man he was with.

II knelt down, with Vessel joining him. He took a deep breath and smiled a little.

“Tommy, Sarah, I…want to introduce you to Vessel. He’s…your other father. He’s come back and he wants to meet you both..” He ran his hands over his jeans in an attempt to self soothe and quell this anxiety.

Sarah hesitated, looking at Vessel. “Are…you going to leave again? Or…is Daddy going to stay?” She asked in a small voice. 

She and Tommy never knew Vessel but oh how they wanted their father happy, and to meet their other dad one day. Now it was happening and it was a lot for a five year old to handle. All they knew was that Daddy was back and Papa was introducing them.

Vessel’s heart broke and he moved closer, offering his hands out to her and Tommy both.

“I’ll stay for as long as you and your father want me to stay. I promise, I won’t go anywhere.”

With that, Sarah slowly took Vessel’s hands, holding them tightly. Tommy though, didn’ say anything, just reached out and place a small hand on Vessel’s arm.

They had a long road ahead of them and II wasn’t quite sure what to expect, but if Sarah and Tommy really wanted Vessel around again, he’d make it work. They still needed to talk more. About this goddess, about…everything, about them. The two of them.

But that could wait for later, II thought as he watched his kids and Vessel. For now, he wanted his kids to finally meet their other father.

Chapter Text

Vessel ended up staying the rest of the day, catching up with the kids, eating lunch and dinner, just soaking all of it in. Suddenly he was glad he and II hadn’t gone through with being properly mated. Otherwise, the pain the Omega would’ve felt having their bond severed…

No, Vessel didn’t want to think about that. 

Instead, he couldn’t believe II had done this by himself for five years. Raising two kids alone. It made the guilt in him all the more prominent. He killed himself all those years ago, unable to endure the pain of it all, and to relieve II of the burden of dealing with him. He just couldn’t stand it, any of it.

Of course, when he woke up in Sleep’s Realm that day, he regretted it. When offered the chance to be her First, to bring back Sleep’s name and worship her, he agreed. Anything to be brought back. To go back to II, to promise he’d never leave again. He wanted nothing more than to make it up to him.

He just never imagined time would pass so fast and differently in reality compared to Sleep’s Realm. What was mere months there, turned out to be several years. He was devastated, so sure II would have moved on. Only, that wasn’t what he had found.

Here he was, helping II tuck the twins into bed, looking at the other often to make sure he was doing it right. He was a father now and he had missed so much. No first words, no first steps. It was all starting to hit him. He just sat on Tommy’s bed, watching as his son and daughter dozed off so easily. 

Part of himself wondered if he should even bother getting involved, especially given he was probably bothering II by being here, but part of him wanted to be here. He wanted to experience being a father, he wanted to grovel at II’s feet and beg for forgiveness and plead for him to let him come back into their lives for good.

Vessel looked at II, who nodded towards the door and he slowly got up, exiting the bedroom with him. The door closed behind them and he followed the Omega into the kitchen again, sitting down at the small table as tea was being made.

II poured Vessel a mug first, gently setting in front of him, made exactly how he always took his tea. Vessel picked up it and sipped it, almost crying as he did. It was such a familiar thing. He forced himself to set the mug down as II sat across from him with his own cup of tea.

“So, you’re…really here..” II murmured, finally breaking the silence between them.

Vessel gave a nod, taking a moment to compose himself.

“Sleep, she…she saved me, II. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true. I promise. I’m better now, I’ve healed and I want to be here, I’ve always wanted a family with you, even if it seemed impossible at the time. I understand if you don’t want me around, if you’ve moved on, but I do want to be here. For Sarah and Tommy…for you..”

II bit his lip, looking down at his mug before he spoke again,

“I’ve never moved on. I never could, you…were everything. The kids remind me so much of you, I could never just let you go.” He licked his lips anxiously. “I don’t want you to feel like you’re obligated to stay. I work so much, the kids have school and activities, I have so much to do, to keep up with the housework, but you don’t have to do anything. You’ve…got this goddess now, you’ve got plans I’m sure, I’d just be holding you back.”

The Alpha’s eyes widened and he reached a hand out, resting it on top of II’s.

“That’s not true. When I came back, I told Sleep I needed to see you. You were the reason I came back and why wouldn’t I want to be here now?”

“I..thought you would want a clean break. A new chance to start over, especially if you’re…better now.” He sighed, looking away.

That hurt Vessel but he knew it was his fault that he had hurt II like this. He resolved to change that. He would spend his life making it up to II.

“I promise, I’m here now, going forward.” Vessel insisted, squeezing II’s hand. “Actually, I…I wanted to talk to you more about what it means, serving Sleep, worshiping her. She said you’d become her Second vessel, that you would help me in spreading her name. I thought a band would be a good way to do so, Sleep agrees and I want you to play drums, like you’ve always had.”

He was excited at the idea of properly starting a band with II. Kids were involved now, yes, but that didn’t mean much had to change. Or so he thought. It might’ve been slightly naive, but Vessel hoped II would see his plan, the plans he had for the future, for everything.

II hesitated though. “A band? I…I don’t know, Vessel. I haven’t played the drums in years, I work so much and looking after the kids..”

“You don’t have to work anymore, Sleep’s promised to provide for us. I’ve been staying in a manor of hers, it has plenty of room for you, for the kids, for the others she wants to bring into the collective. There’s a lot of land for the twins so run around and explore, it…could be our new home.” Vessel said softly. 

The fact that II hadn’t played drums this entire time hurt. He knew he loved playing them, and the fact he gave it all up so he could raise Sarah and Tommy? He swallowed hard.

“I’m sure you can pick up right where you left off on the drums, II. You’ve always been talented.”

“I..don’t know. Uprooting the twins and moving, joining this…Sleep…its a lot..” II murmured. He swallowed thickly, taking a sip of his tea. “Can I think about, Vessel? Please?” He asked after a moment. 

Vessel’s heart sank a little but he understood. It was a lot to ask after all. He nodded and gave II a small smile.

“Think it over, II. Let me know, okay? No matter what, I still want to be apart of the twins’ life, your life. Would that be okay?”

II gave Vessel a small smile in return and gave a little nod. 

“Of course you can.”

If this was some sort of second chance, who was II to reject it? The two of them sat for awhile, in silence, drinking their tea. A moment of peace between them, before Vessel went back home to the manor, and before II crawled into bed, in need of making a big decision now.