Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The hurried footsteps, the sirens in the distance, the loud thrumming of his heart and their heavy breathing. It was all overwhelming his senses, an anxiety settling in that not even Marcus' warm hand on his could calm.

They ran, and then they ran a little more discreetly, and when deemed safe, they stopped and Marcus dialed up Bill. They were tucked away safely on an empty alley, behind a parked white van. Matt let his head fall forward onto the older man's chest, as he tried regulating his breathing and calming down his hammering heart. 

How could Marcus sound so calm on the phone?

"He'll be here in 10 minutes. I told him to take a few wrong turns and loops just in case someone – the cops or Sebastian's men – try and follow him."

Matt nodded in understanding, and he felt Marcus' hands craddling the back of his head and his waist, pulling him closer towards him in a loving embrace. He took a deep breath in, finally able to relax in Marcus' arms, inhaling the smell of his colone clinging to his clothes. He was safe, for now. They were safe. And Sebastian.... Sebastian couldn't hurt him anymore. His- his brother-

"Bunny?" Marcus whispered, caressing the younger's sandy brown locks. Matt was shaking, sobbing in his arms.

"My- my brother is dead-"

Marcus held him even tighter, and Matt could feel the beating of his heart underneat his cheek. "I'm sorry, bunny. But he was going to kill you. He was never gonna stop until he killed us both."

"I know." Matt answered, sounding a little like a petulant child and hating himself for it. How could he explain, that even though Sebastian treated him so poorly the past few years, even though he hurted him and hurted the ones he cared about, even if he tried to kill him..... He still felt, deep underneat all the pain and anger, a silver of love and foundness for the man that was once like his older brother. The brother before the life of crime, who teached him how to play ball and who'd been all he had after his mother passed away?

Matt lifted his head, to look Marcus in the eyes. Those gentle, caring brown eyes. Which carried so many unspoken feeling behind them. "I don't blame you. I know, he'd hunt us down forever. It was his death or ours. And he- he was a terrible person." Marcus' thumb carressed his cheek, right above the bruise blooming on his jaw. "So now, at least, there's one less terrible person in this world."

"You're right, bunny." Brown eyes travelled from his, down his face, his body. Strong hands on his shoulders, down his arms. "Are you ok? Are you injured?"

Matt shook his head. "Nothing serious, I think. Scraps and bruises." Marcus nodded, still checking him over. As Matt was about to ensist that he was fine, a car pulled up to the alley. He recognized the model as the one Bill drove, although the license plates seemed to always change.

Marcus held his hand again, and pulled him towards the parking car. He opened the door for Matt to go in, before circling around and entering on the other side. As soon and they were both securely in, Bill drove away.

Marcus' hand found his, and held it gently. Matt felt the urgent need to be in the older man's arms again, and so he changed into the middle seat, laying his head on Marcus' shoulder, and pulling up his legs to be on top of his lap. The man let him, with a gentle smile, his arms holding him there, one around his lower back, the other under his knees.

They stayed silent for a bit, until the need to explain all that's been revealed today overwhelmed him.

"You know, Sebastian wasn't really my brother. He's actually my cousin, from my mother's side. He raised me after she died. I was 10 and he was 26. So he was always like an older brother to me." Matt took a shaky breath, trying to hold back the tears. "That was, until he got into the family mafia business and dragged me into it. To be his, as you said, little rat. Who could sneak everywhere and do as he said. Someone he had full control over."

"How old were you when that started?"

Matt gulped, willing away the memories of his first years. When he first learned how to fight, how to kick his way out of adult men's grasps. Sebastian would have him train with grown men, much stronger than him – and out of the bunch, only Dan ever went easy on him. The others always seemed pleased to punch and kick and hold down a panicked teenage boy half their size. "Uh, 15. I'm 20 now."

"Fifteen...." Marcus kissed the top of his head, then his forehead. Matt felt the tears roll down his cheeks. "That fucker is lucky he got such a quick end. He didn't deserve the mercy of a bullet between the eyes."

"I guess so...." Even now, it was difficult to admit. That he both grieved, and felt relieved, at the same time, that his brother was dead. "I'm not even a Vitarelli, you know. That's his father's side of the family. But he brought me into it anyways. And with that, made me owe the Vitarelli mafia a lot of money. A hundred thousand. He said it's what he spent on me, that now I was a man and had to pay him back. Even though I've spend the last 5 years working for him without making a cent."

"Do you think anyone will still come after you, with Sebastian dead? Will the Vitarelli still want money from you?" Marcus asked, his voice all business-like. Matt shrugged.

"I'm not sure. I never had anyone else come to me, but maybe they'll try now? I- I don't know."

He was scared, once again. That there would be people showing up at their- at Marcus' house, to threaten him. That he would be kidnapped again, or that Olivia would. That Marcus would be caught on the crossfire, that he'd be shot again because of him and that he might die because of him and-

"Matt." Marcus said, and the younger man raised his head to look at him. He'd never called him by his name before – actually, he didn't even bother to ask for his name before, until Sebastian had told him what it was. It was weird, hearing it coming from Marcus' mouth, given shape by the low timbre of his voice. "Everything will be ok."

"Marcus..." Matt whispered, trying out the older man's name as well. He felt more than heard the resulting sharp intake of breath from the man under him. And now that he thought about it, he was basically sitting on top of Marcus. He felt blush rise to his cheeks, his ears. Then, he felt the gentle touch of Marcus' lips on his, just a small peck, over as quickly and its started. "I'm sorry. I'm scared."

"I know, bunny. But I've got you."

The ride was soon over, and so Matt untaggled himself from Marcus in order for them to get inside. The older man lingered a little back, talking to Bill, but Matt did a beeline for his own room. He thought, for a moment, about going to Marcus' room instead, but he didn't want to intrude like that. Ok, Marcus liked him, and he liked Marcus, and apparently kissing is something they did now, but that still didn't mean he could just go into Marcus' private space like that. The room he, until so little ago, shared with his fiancée... For all Matt knew, Marcus was still his boss. And he was still just his slave.

He closed the door behind himself and started taking off his clothes. Now that he was coming off the adrenaline, everything hurt. He gasped as lifting his arms to take off his shirt resulted in a sharp stab in his stomach – he hoped nothing was broken. A quick glance at the mirror in the corner of the room showed him the bruises adorning his torso, from merciless boots and fists. His whole body ached. He'd been so kicked and thrown around lately, and now that it was over, it was all catching up to him.

A quiet knock was heard from the door. There was only one person it could be. Matt let out a quiet "come in" that must've still been heard, because in comes Marcus holding a pack of ice, a water bottle and a granola bar.

"I had a feeling you'd need this. And I was right." Marcus put the drink and food down on his bedside table, before coming closer to him with the ice pack at hand. Matt was still facing the mirror, with his back to the older man. "That's a nasty bruise on your stomach."

"He stepped on me." Matt shared, not sure why. No need to upset Marcus even more with more details. However, it seemed like his brain was tired of holding all his pain alone. Years, of keeping to himself all that Sebastian did to him. Now, he had someone to share his pain with.

"Let's apply this. Then, while you eat, I'll get you some painkillers."

Marcus came up behind him, and his arms circled his waist, touching the ice to his bruise. Matt shivered at the coldness on his warm skin, but he knew it would feel better soon. And it also felt good, emotionally, to have Marcus take care of him like this.

He leaned back, resting his head on the brunet's shoulder and baring his throat for Marcus, who left two gentle kisses on his sensitive skin there, before hiding his face on the side of his neck.

"I... Hadn't been that scared in so long." Marcus inhaled, taking in the smell of Matt's skin. "Seeing him touch that gun to your face... I thought I was going to lose you."

Matt opened his eyes, having closed them without even noticing. "I felt the same way, when he pointed the gun at you."

Marcus chuckled, but when his gaze met Matt's through the mirror, there were tears in his eyes.

"Were you jealous? Because you're the only one who can point a gun at me?"

The younger felt himself blush once again, and squirmed a little in Marcus' arms. He didn't like to think back to that moment, when he had held Marcus' life in his hands. He hated it, actually. He'd never do that again. But for the sake of a hot man flirting with him right now, he went along.

"Yeah." He smiled turning around in Marcus arms to face him, his bare chest touching the older man's covered one. There was something hot about it – being this vulnerable, partially undressed while the other was fully dressed. It furthered their power dynamic, in a way. It made something hot and viscous like lava bubble up inside him. He bit his lower lip, his eyes travelling down to Marcus' lips, and up to his eyes again. "Will you... Help me take off my shoes and my- my pants?"

Marcus nodded without a word, and handed him the ice for him to hold to his own stomach before dropping to his knees-

"What- what are you doing?!"

Marcus smiled, looking up at him, while his hands did for quick work untying his shoelaces. "Helping you?"

Matt nodded, and let the man undo his laces and pull his sneakers off, one and then the other, and then his socks, before standing up to tuck it all away neatly by the door. All the while Matt stood there, shirtless and holding an ice pack to his boot-shaped bruise. And when Marcus came over to him again, he felt like a little rabbit, stuck in place by fear, being approached by a lynx.

Except it wasn't fear that stilled his body. It was that lava inside his tummy, stronger than any "butterflies" he's ever felt. It was a pull, like him and Marcus were polar opposites of the world's strongest magnet.

When Marcus finally got close, his hands instantly went for Matt's belt. The younger man took a shaky breath, as skilled hands quickly undid his belt, then the button and the fly. Only then, did Marcus' eyes find his again, but not before exploring his whole body as if he wanted to eat him whole-

"Think you can do the rest?" Marcus asked, with a quirked eyebrow. He kept doing this – this pushing and pushing only to pull back when Matt was craving him the most. "You have some comfortable pajamas in the second drawer, I got them for you."

"Why... Why don't you finish what you started?" Matt asked, sounding strained, almost needy. He wanted Marcus. He craved him, his touch and his kisses and all he could give him.

"Not tonight, bunny." Marcus' left hand held the side of his face, while the other gently rested on top of his own, where the ice pack eased away his pain. "You need to rest. But... We have all the time in the world. Don't rush it." 

Matt changed into the pajamas, and discarded the mostly-melted ice to settle on the bed, and snack on his granola bar. He knew Marcus was right – he was hurt, he was sore. He couldn't even lift his arms or bend down without his eyes sprinkling with tears. What was going on in his head to think it'd be a good idea to try and... And have sex with Marcus? Marcus who, he had to keep reminding himself, had a fiancée-

"Is it any good? Sorry, I didn't know what you liked." Marcus took him out of his thoughts as he walked back into the room. He sat down on the edge of the bed, close to Matt.

"Yeah, it's good. Thank you."

Marcus smiled, so genuine. He extended a hand with a white pill for the younger to take, and so he swallow it down with a sip of his water before finishing up his bar.

"I'll leave you to rest now. But if you need anything, either come get me or call out. My room's right down the corridor. I'll hear you."

And with that, he leaned down, and kissed Matt. Matt's hands came up to his face, as Marcus nibble his lip and deepened the kiss. They just enjoyed the moment, kissing slowly and basking in each other's touch for a few minutes. Soon though, Marcus left him with a quick kiss on top of his head and wish for a good night's sleep. And it was with the memory of the man's lips on his that Matt rested his hand on the soft pillow, and quickly fell asleep.

Chapter Text

Morning came with the soft rays of sun breaching through the gaps in the blinds.

Matt slowly stretched his body, aware of the few aches still lingering after yesterday. And what a fucking day had yesterday been – all he wanted for today was to be able to have some peace without having to fear anyone he cares about dying. That couldn't be too much to ask for.

He got up and went straight for the shower. The warm water helped ease away the uncomfortable sensations in his muscles, and it felt, in a way, like he was washing away all that's bad that's lingering in his mind.

He thought about Marcus. About how he risked his life to save him.... About how he pulled him into a desperate hug the moment they were safe. How he confessed and kissed him. It made Matt smile like a teenager with his first crush – and in a way, it almost was.

He'd had school "crushes" before. Of course, it's a bit difficult to develop any relationships when you're being explored by the mafia, but there had been a few friends and classmates along the years that had made his heart pump faster. Mostly girls, but a couple of boys too. Boys, which he'd shared quick hidden kisses with, in the school bathroom, afraid anyone would know, afraid the word would get around. What would people think? But now, after meeting Marcus... He didn't care anymore. This.... This shame was pointless.

"I only care about what brings me pleasure", Marcus had said.

And he was different. Matt had never been in love but, this was probably the closest he's ever been. And the thought alone shakes him to his core.

After drying himself, and innitially planning on just putting yesterday's clothes back on, Matt decides to check out the drawers again first – he was sure he had seen some other stuff there last night. And sure enough, there was a clean change of clothes his size, just a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt, the usual stuff he wears, black underwear and socks. He didn't know when or why Marcus had decided to keep spare clothes and pajamas at his guest room for Matt, but he was very greatful for it.

Taking a last look at himself in the mirror while fixing his hair, he noticed the bruise on his jaw was already turning yellow on the edges. He couldn't wait for it to disappear, so he didn't have to think about Sebastian every time he looked at himself in the mirror.

As he exited the room, he chanced a glance at Marcus's room, the door at the end of the hallway. It was closed, but he was sure the man who slept there was already awake. And the smell of freshly toasted bread that hit his nose the next second made that clear.

Marcus was in the kitchen, in plain grey slacks and black t-shirt. His feet were in expensive looking leather slippers, and his hair still looked wet from a morning shower. His back was to the door, so he didn't immediatly notice Matt as he stood there, by the door, taking in the view of a domestic Marcus making them breakfast. It felt a little surreal.

"Good morning, bunny." Marcus greeted, as he turned around with a plate of buttered toast. "How are you feeling? Any better?"

Matt startled back from his thoughts, a little flustered. "Uh, yeah, much better. Thank you for everything, boss."

Marcus smiled, shaking his head as he put the plate down on the table. "I'm glad to hear that. I hope you're hungry too."

Matt made his way to the table, a little shy but a little guidy, and stood in front of Marcus to give him a quick peck on his lips before pulling the chair and sitting down. "You treat me too well."

The older man rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing a little in a comforting manner. "You're the one giving me all I could want." He said, with a soft almost dreamy tone to his voice.

It didn't go unnoticed by Matt. It could only have something to do with his ex-fiancée, and their past relationship. Matt didn't know, what went wrong. He had felt bad for her, the moment he met her – he could tell, Marcus didn't love her. He imagined there was a time he did – Marcus didn't strike him as the type to propose with no love involved. But, some time between then and now, something went wrong.

Either way, it was not his place to ask. Not now, when they didn't even know where they stood with each other, what they were to each other.

"You lose yourself in your head so easily." Marcus commented, putting down the jugs of juice, milk and a coffee pot on the table, and sitting opposite of Matt. "Are you sure you didn't hit your head?"

That made Matt laugh. It was true, wasn't it? He kept getting lost in his thoughts. And it was all because of the man in front of him, taking a bite of his own toast.

"I didn't hit my head. Not yesterday, at least. I just... Have a lot on my mind."

And that was answer enough for Marcus, at least for now. They proceeded to eat their food, the older man telling him he was increasing the security and surveillence in his house so that if any stupid Vitarelli tried anything, Matt would be safe; that he had ordered Bill and his other men to go and pick up all of Matt's stuff from Sebastian's house. How did he even know that the younger lived with his cousin? He had no idea.

"That's actually something I wanted to talk with you about." Marcus started, brown eyes fixed on blue ones, a stern look on his face. Matt nodded for him to continue. "The necklace I gave you. You wore it all this time."

Matt looked confused. "Yeah, I- I thought I was supposed to. And it looks nice, anyways."

"You were supposed to. Because there's a tracker inside of it." Matt's eyebrows jumped, and he instinctively touched his right hand to the necklace. He certainly didn't know about that. "That's how I found you. But that's also how I knew you lived in Sebastian's house."

"Ok... Makes sense." Matt's gaze strayed away, as he worked his lower lip between his teeth. "I-... Could you remove that? I want to keep wearing it but... I don't want to be constantly observed-"

Marcus quickly nodded, extending his hand as an invitation for Matt to hold it. And so he did. "Of course, bunny. That's why I'm telling you about it. You... Don't have to follow the rules anymore. Do you understand, what I mean?"

Something in Matt's chest cracked and broke. Did Marcus not want him anymore? Was this it? He should have known, that yesterday's kindness must just have been just that – kindness. And now, Marcus was letting him down gently. He tried to take his hand away from Marcus', but the older grabbed it before he could go any further. "I could just give it back to you. Who knows when you're gonna need it for a new one."

Marcus' gaze darkened a little bit, almost imperceptible. But Matt noticed. "I want you to keep it. To wear it, all the time. I like seeing you wearing it." The older's eyes went from his, to his lips, down his neck to where the blue stone rested above his heart. "I don't want you gone, bunny. There's no "new one". I want you. I thought I had made that clear." Marcus' free hand cupped his cheek, thumb caressing his skin gently. "We like each other, don't we?"

"Yeah." Matt could barely respond with the lump in his throat.

"And we... Kiss. And last night, you even wanted more."

Matt felt his heartbeat speed up and his face flush at the mention of more. "And you don't? Want more?"

Marcus let out what could only be described as a growl as he leaned forward above the table, cursing the damn thing in his head for being in the way of him getting closer to Matt. "I do. I want all of you, all to myself." Matt gasps, as Marcus's thumb goes from his cheek to tracing his bottom lip. "But, before we take things any further, we need to clear some things up." The brunet's hand suddenly disappears from his face, startling Matt into a more attentive state. Yeah, he should probably be totally focused for this next part. "You are not my slave anymore, Matt. You can leave anytime. I won't go after you. And, you don't have to do what I tell you. You have free will. I- I can't be your boss anymore if we do this."

Matt had that kicked puppy look on his face again. It still somehow felt a little like a rejection. "W-Why?"

"I've... Been there before. I couldn't have been older than you. The kid who catches the eye of the older, powerful man." There's a small pause, a dark silence hanging in between them, as memories seem to flash before Marcus' eyes. "Except, he didn't have even half the morals I do. And he didn't care, that I couldn't say no to him, or I'd be risking my life."

And Matt, Matt was out of words. "Marcus-"

"What I'm saying, bunny, is that I... Really like you. And I want to do this with you. But not if you're my slave. Not if you feel like you can't say no."

Matt understood. God, he really understood – the power imbalance of their previous relationship couldn't really translate into a safe and consensual enviroment for anything sexual to develop. Marcus had held too much power over him, had owned him... And all because Matt was being forced into that position. Marcus might've never done anything to hurt him during that time, quite the opposite, he had gone the extra lenghts to save him multiple times. From the moment they met. However, it was still there – the threat to his life, forcing him under Marcus' nail. A worst man could've taken the chance to take advantage of this position. However, Marcus didn't, and had no interest in doing so. He wanted fair, equal ground, for them to stand on. He wanted to make sure Matt was truely safe.

And Matt, well... He had never really had any sexual experiences except for some making out sessions that never went below the belt. But he couldn't lie and say he didn't know what he liked, and what he wanted from Marcus – all those times he had been grabbed, shoved, manhandled by the older man... It certainly had made him feel something.

"I understand. I can leave, I can say no. I'm not your slave." Marcus nodded along every word, agreeing with what the younger was saying. Matt stood up suddenly, going around the table to stand in front of Marcus. His hands instinctively found Matt's hips and pulled him towards him. Matt let himself be pulled, opening his legs to straddle Marcus and sit on his lap. "But... I'm still yours."

Marcus hummed, low and dangerously under his breath, strong hands grabbing and squeezing Matt's thighs. A shiver ran down his spine. "The same way I'm yours."

They kissed, both leaning at the same time until their lips collided. It got heated fast, Marcus' tongue breaching into Matt's mouth as the younger let out an embarassing whimper at the intrusion. Marcus' hands didn't still at his thighs – they held his hips, groped at his ass, grabbed his waist, travel up his back and down to squeeze his ass again. Matt felt a little delirious, squirming and whining and moaning as he felt Marcus' rough hands exploring his body, his lips stealing his breath before kissing down his neck, his beard tickling the sensitive skin.

"Bunny..." Marcus practically growled next to his ear, as Matt felt confident enough to grind down on his crotch, wanting to feel more and more of the older man's strong body under him. "You're making me go crazy. Do you know, how hard it was? Having to control myself around you? Having to hold back?"
Matt pulled Marcus' face away from his neck with both hands, coaching him to look him in the eyes. The brown of his irises had disappeared behind his fully blown pupils, a hungry look to his eyes. Matt knew his had to match in intensity – he had never felt this much want before.

"Then stop holding back."

That was all Marcus needed to hook his hands under Matt's thighs and stand up, taking them both to his bedroom.

Chapter Text

The sheets in Marcus' bed were black and silky, just like the ones in his bed were. It fit the man – his dark and ostentatious character. A rich man, who dwelt on shady business. Who exuded power and sensuality in his every move.

And now, he was closing the door behind them and laying Matt down on his black silky sheets and crimson duvet. The curtains on his windows were closed, casting the room in a warm dim light. There were about 6 pillows on the king sized bed, comfortable under Matt's head and back – it was like falling in a pile of clouds.

For all of Marcus' want and desire displayed before, he was being gentle and thoughtful with him – they both hadn't forgotten that Matt was still partially hurt. The wince he let out when he raised his arms so Marcus could take off his shirt made it all very clear. 

"Everything ok?" Marcus checked in, drawing circles with his hands on Matt's naked torso. The younger nodded, eyes semi-closed and lost between the gentle touch and the comfortable bed all around him. "Use your words, bunny."

"I'm ok. Way more than ok, actually." He smiled, hands travelling up Marcus' strong arms, up to his firm shoulders and down his back. "You know... I had wanted to come here, last night. I wanted... To sleep in your bed, with you. But I didn't know if I was allowed to."

Marcus frowned a little, still keeping up with the gentle caresses to Matt's soft skin. "You're allowed to. But thank you for respecting my privacy." He leaned down, but instead of his lips, he kissed Matt's flushed cheek. "From now on, just ask. Anything you want, ask me. I'll do the same."

Matt nodded, before remembering Marcus wanted him to use his voice. "Yes, boss." 

The name came more as a reflex than anything, but Matt instantly noticed his mistake. Marcus shook his head, fixing him with a stern look. "Not your boss anymore, remember?"

Matt shrugged, sneaking his hands under the older man's shirt, longuing for some skin-on-skin contact. "I do like when you boss me around." He gave him a teasing smile, or at least that's what he aimed for. It must've worked, because Marcus dove in for a heated kiss, biting at his already redden lips and exploring his mouth with his tongue. 

"You do, of course you do." Marcus hummed, beginning to kissing and suck at the sensitive skin of Matt's neck. The boy squirmed under him, running his nails down Marcus' back. "And then you do exactly as I say, because you're my good boy. Aren't you?"

Matt whined, embarassed, shy, confused, he wasn't sure, but he whined and then he nodded enthusiatically because yes, he'd do everything Marcus told him to do because he fucking wanted to.

Unable to wait any longer, Matt grabbed the hem of Marcus' shirt and gestured for him to take it off. The older chuckled but did just so, throwing it to the ottoman at the feet of the bed, where Matt's shirt had also been thrown to earlier. The first touch of their bare skins had been electric, as Marcus encouraged Matt's legs open so he could position himself between them and lay on top of the younger man, chest to chest, their mouths finding each other and silencing the moan escaping through Matt's lips. 

"I've thought about this... Ever since that day, with the lie detector." Matt confessed, whining when Marcus sucked a particularly hard hickey on the skin just below the bruise on his jaw. Making bruises of his own. Ones born from pleasure, and not from pain. "When you told me to take my clothes off. While you were standing there, shirtless and angry at me. I wanted you to pull me and hold me against your chest-" Matt took in a sharp breath as Marcus licked one of his nipples, then the other. His hands went to Marcus' shoulders for support, squeezing the strong muscles. "I wanted to feel you-"

"Me too." Another lick, and then a strong suck. Matt's back arched off the mattress as he whimpered in response. "What else, baby?"

Matt moaned at the petname. "When... When you bent me over the table-" He couldn't say it. He was pretty sure he was blushing down to his chest, his palms were sweaty as he clawed at Marcus' shoulders and he kept unconsciously trying to close his legs to get some friction, or maybe hide how much this was affecting him, only to be stopped by the sturdy man between them, kissing his way up and down Matt's body. It was all so overwhelming, Matt felt like he might just have died and reached heaven. 

Marcus had the audacity to laugh, his voice deliciously low and manly, while he nibbled at the skin of the boy's stomach. "No rough handling this time, bunny." He left wet kisses all over the bruising there, so close to the waistline of the younger's jeans, before sitting back on his heels. "I'm treating you like a prince today."

Marcus took his sweet time taking in the view of Matt on the bed in front of him. His sandy brown hair sprawled on the pillows, his lips wet and flushed a deep red, his rosy cheeks and his blue irises swallowed by his pupils, dilated from arousal. Marcus' necklace, resting on top of his rapidly beating heart. The contrast of his pale skin on the black sheets. A delicious thin layer of sweat covering his body, and the hickeys Marcus had left behind. His nipples perked up and the clear erection straining at his jeans.

His opened legs around Marcus's hips, the way their bodies fit so nicely together, like they belonged like this.

"You are beautiful." He said, so earnest, running his hands up Matt's thighs. "So beautiful, laying here in my bed, wearing my necklace, all mine." The hands stopped at the waistline, fingers threatning to dip inside. "Tell me, bunny. Do you want me to take these off?"

Matt tried to think it over, to not be impulsive. But, truth be told, he couldn't wait any longer. He had almost felt like exploding when Marcus left after undoing his jeans last night. And now, he knew the action would be followed by something else – something more. And, god, he wanted more.

"Yes, please." He answered, biting his lower lip, barely containing his excitement. 

Marcus let out a low chuckle, and his hands went to work. "So polite, bunny."

He undid Matt's button and zipper, and then with a collective effort they managed to get the pants off his legs, taking his socks with it, and leaving Matt only in his underwear. It was so obvious, through the thin material, how hard he was right now. Matt groaned, and he couldn't help but bring his arms up to cover his face and close his legs together, being able to now that Marcus had scooted a little further down in the bed in order to take off the boy's jeans. His body trembled as he pressed his thighs together, giving himself some relief. That's when he felt hands on his knees, holding them still, but not pulling them apart.

"Bunny." Marcus' voice was a little stern, and a shiver ran down Matt's spine. "Can you open your legs for me?"

It took him a deep breath and a few seconds to calm himself, but Matt relaxed his legs under Marcus' touch and let his knees fall apart, the older man moving himself back between them, hands caressing his now bare thighs. "That's good, baby... Now let me see your face." 

Matt slowly parted his arms, letting them fall to the pillows above his head. Marcus' face was centimeters away, his body covering his, looking down at him like he was the most precious things he'd ever seen. It made Matt feel even more shy, and he had to fight the urge to cover his face again. He didn't want to imagine, how many beautiful people Marcus had been with. How many people he'd be compared to. Meanwhile, Matt had never been with someone. He had no experience. He felt lost, and embarassed, and-

"There's that beautiful face." Marcus' voice took him out of his spiraling thoughts, and he leaned in to kiss Matt's cheek, then his lips. "Why are you hiding, bunny? Talk to me."

Matt swallowed, shifting his gaze to some blank space on the ceiling right beside Marcus' head. He couldn't look at him right now. "I- I feel embarassed. Being so... Naked, in front of you."

Marcus hummed, nudging Matt's cheek with his nose. "Look at me." And the boy obeyed, blue eyes meeting brown ones. "I imagine you've never had sex before." It wasn't a question. Matt nodded in agreement anyways. "It's normal to feel shy the first time – even the first few times. But I find you very beautiful and very attractive. You don't need to hide... Not from me. And, besides that" Marcus gently grabbed one of Matt's hands still resting above his head, and brought it down, down, down the sturdy muscles of his chest and abdomen, past the waistline of his pants, until he was holding Matt's palm against his crotch and- Oh. "There's no need to feel ashamed of your desire. I feel the same way."

He'd barely done anything but still managed to have that effect on Marcus. A sudden surge of confidence striked Matt, and he slowly squeezed the older man's erection in his hand. Marcus growned, kissing Matt with a renowed heat and urgency, his tongue exploring his mouth and licking at his lower lip. 

Marcus undid his own pants before shoving them off down his legs, followed by his underwear. Matt couldn't help but stare at Marcus' cock, standing hard and big, so close to his own clothed cock that if he just raised his hips a little bit... 

"Bunny" Matt looked back at Marcus' face, eyes big and mouth slightly agap. "Can I take yours off, too?"

He nodded his head enthusiatically, murmuring yes under his breath, and the older nodded back, before ridding Matt of his black boxers. He stared at Marcus' face, trying to... read his reaction. Looking for something to sooth how insecure he felt inside. And when Marcus looked up from his cock back to Matt's face, eyes travelling his entire body now that it was finally free for him, and only him, to see, he wore a teasing smile, but somehow his eyes looked even blacker, pupils blown wide with the want burning inside him.

"All of you is beautiful." He leaned down, leaving a gentle peck on Matt's cheek, before kissing him properly. "And only mine to see, isn't that right?" He murmured against the boy's lips.

Matt swallowed, his hands travelling the expanse of Marcus' back. "Yes. I'm all yours."

"Good boy." Marcus hands went for his thighs, taking a hold of each one as he sat back on his heels, opening Matt's legs further. The boy whined, his hands grabbing the duvet on each side of his body. He felt so... Exposed. But also so incredibly willing to be... Marcus, sitting there, naked, spreading his legs, with his cock so hard and big... It sure was a view Matt wanted imprinted in his memories forever. This feeling, of wanting someone so much, of wanting to belong to someone so badly... It almost brought tears to his eyes, however stupid that might be.

Marcus kept running his hands over his legs, eyes locked with Matt's. "I want to take things slowly with you, bunny." With a hand under Matt's knee, he raised his leg until it was hooked on his shoulder, leaving Matt even more open and exposed than before. Marcus looked down, admiring the view before quickly wetting his lower lip, as if Matt was the most delicious meal someone's ever put in front of him. 

"You... Like what you see?" Matt joked, trying to at least turn some of his insecurities into confidence. Fake it until you make it and all that. 

"I do. A lot." Marcus answered, and started to kiss and suck at the skin of Matt's inner thigh. The boy moaned, his back arching off the mattress involuntarily as he tighten his grip on the duvet. "You're so reactive, bunny. I can't wait to discover all the sounds I can get out of you." 

"Marcus-" Matt whimpered, as the older man got closer and closer to his crotch. His thigh was laddered with kisses, hickeys and bites, and there was nothing Matt could do but squirm and whimper as he felt his cock start to leak. "Please-"

Instead of touching him where Matt wanted him the most, Marcus switched to his other leg, letting the other one fall from his shoulder. "Are you going to tell me what you want, baby?"

Matt's cock twitched where it lay hard against his lower belly, and he bit his lip so hard it almost bled. Could he ask for it? For Marcus'... mouth, on him, around him... Making him feel so good. The older man had told him, to ask him when he wanted something. And Matt wanted this really, really bad.

"I... I want you to use your mouth." He confessed, feeling the way his cheeks heated up. Marcus kissed up his thigh, up, so close... "Please, Marcus-"

"You want my mouth... Where, exactly?" Marcus asked, amused, with a stupid teasing grin on his face, running his hands up and down Matt's leg still on his shoulder. "I fear you're gonna have to be a little more specific, bunny. Because I think I've been using my mouth on you, if your body covered in marks is anything to go by."

Matt huffed, bitting at his lip, embarassed. Marcus was enjoying teasing him like this. Fuck it. "On my cock." He said it, doing his best at mantaining eye contact with the older man. 

Marcus' smile widdened, and he finally stopped abusing the skin of Matt's thighs in order to drop to his elbows between his legs. Matt gasped, his whole body almost trembling in antecipation. "Is that so?" The brunet asked, in the same teasing tone. Matt nodded, and he was about to voice his consent when a hand finally wrapped around his cock and oh god.

He had to take a deep, deep breath in, or he was sure this would end too soon.

Marcus moved his hand slowly, up and down, thumbing at the head of his cock, spreading the wetness around, before moving closer, his lips only a couple of inches away. "Keep your hands by your sides, but be as loud as you want. If anything feels wrong or you want me to stop, just say it. I'll stop immediatly. Understood?" His voice was serious but gentle, the commanding tone that made Matt feel like melting into the bed.

"Yes, understood." 

"Hmm, good boy. And so hard and wet for me already... Can't leave you waiting any longer, now, can we?"

Matt whimpered, squirming under Marcus' touch. "No, please--" Marcus' hand stopped, holding him at the base of his cock, before he finally leaned in and wrapped his lips around the head. A loud moan left Matt's mouth, and the boy tried his best to keep his hips still, tightening his grip on the duvet, his knuckles turning white. He almost closed his eyes, but when Marcus started taking more and more of him in his mouth, how could he look away from the sight of the man's lips around his cock, his hair stuck with sweat to his forehead, his eyes looking up at him to watch his reactions? And the way he was sprawled on the bed between his legs, the sturdy muscles of his back, his arms, his ass, his legs.... 

When Marcus started bobbing his head up and down, Matt was reduced to a mess of gasps and attempts at moaning his name that always got lost to a incoherent moan midway. He couldn't stay still – he arched his back off the bed, his legs trembled and flinched and almost closed around Marcus' head. The older man had to hold his hips still with a hand, the other one still holding and working on his cock, in order for him to not fuck back into Marcus' mouth. It felt heavenly, not even close to when Matt would touch himself alone. The wet, hot, velvety drag of his tongue... The way he'd suck on his head before taking all of him inside his mouth again.

Matt never stood a chance in lasting more than a few minutes.

Seeming to read his mind, Marcus pulled back, his lips impossibly red and wet from the use. Matt couldn't help the whimper that left his mouth at the sudden loss of touch right when he was so close. "How are you feeling, bunny?" Marcus asked, his hand previously holding his hip travelled up his navel, his belly, to his chest, and Matt promply rested his own hand on top of it, holding Marcus' palm on top of his rapidly beating heart. 

"I'm so close, Marcus-" 

"I know baby, I know. I wanted to ask you something." Matt nodded, just wanting him to spit it out so they could continue. "I want to ask, do you want me to eat you out?"

Oh. Matt's mind short-circuited, his breath coming in as a gasp. He'd never even touched himself there, and before meeting Marcus, he wasn't even sure if he'd ever have any interest in trying. He knew, it was tied to his... Internalized homophobia, or whatever it was called. Even when he was with boys, he never thought of himself as a bottom, or submissive. That wasn't how men were supposed to be, right?

But, again. All of that was before Marcus. It was really a changing point in his life – before and after meeting Marcus. And now, thinking about it... About Marcus, touching him there, with his tongue and his lips... with his fingers. Opening him up, making him feel so stretched, the two of them so impossibly close to each other, with Marcus inside of him and fucking him-

It sure was a possibility he was considering now. 

And Marcus eating him out... He had no idea how it'd feel, if he would like it. But there was only one way to find out.

"Yes." Matt nodded, his hands going for Marcus' shoulders against the older man's previous orders, but Matt felt so excited, so anxious, so fucking needy that he forgot about it. He squeeze his shoulders, digging his shorts nails into the skin. "Yes, I want it. Please."

Marcus smiled, kissing the bruised skin on Matt's lower belly. "You're so polite bunny, even when telling me you want me to eat that gorgeous ass of yours."

Marcus' mouth was absolutely foul, every time he said something sexual to him Matt felt his toes curl and his face burn and he needed that dirty mouth on him immediatly. Marcus grabbed the younger's legs under his knees and bent them to his chest, asking Matt to be a good boy and hold them there – and so he did, ignoring how embarassed he felt at the fact that he was somehow even more exposed than before.

Matt took a deep breath in, trying to relax again against the comfy bed and pillows below and around him, even closing his eyes for a couple of seconds. He needed to relax, to let himself have this, without worrying anymore about his body and what he was doing. It was just Marcus and him, in the intimacy of his bedroom. It was nobody else's business. Why care, about what anyone would think? He was Marcus', and this moment was theirs.

The brunet went back to sucking his dick, dragging his tongue and blowing softly on the head just to make Matt's body shiver with it. His lips travelled down to his balls, down his perineum, until he groped Matt's ass, squeezing it in his hands while he groaned before Matt felt the first touch of Marcus' tongue to his hole. Just a slow, long lick, followed by a few others, like he was tasting him and enjoying every second of it.

Matt whined, nails digging into the back of his thighs. He tried to sit up a little bit more, wanting to see it better, see how Marcus was licking at his hole and bitting his inner thighs and buttocks before going back for more. It was sinful, the hottest thing he'd ever seen. And he wanted more.

"More, Marcus, please." He pleaded, his lower lip stuck between his teeth. The grip Marcus had on him, where his ass meet his thighs, tightened. "More-"

And the older man delivered, the tip of his tongue circling Matt's hole before he breached in, fucking his tongue in and out and sucking at his rim. Matt moaned his name, tears prickling his eyes at the overwhelming everything, the touches, the feelings, the realization. 

And Marcus was in heaven too. The boy was a walking piece of desire he couldn't seem to ever get enough of. And now he was here, laying at his mercy, so willing to please and be pleased, and oh, how much did Marcus want to please him... Be the reason for all the beautiful noises coming out of the boys lips, and of all the pleasure written in his face. 

He couldn't wait to see the face he'd make when Marcus finally made him come.

And so he kept eating the younger's plump ass while one of his hands started stroking his cock. Matt cried out, his hips bucking up and his legs shaking in his own grasp. He was holding himself open so nicely for Marcus... Such a good boy. The fucking best Marcus had ever had, with the most beautiful ocean blue eyes and the most delicious ass.

It was getting painful, how hard Marcus was. He humped into the mattress, trying to get some relief while thinking about how it would feel to grab his cock and fuck it into the tight heat of Matt's hole. How the boy would moan and claw at his back, how he'd hide his face on his neck and beg him for more. 

Marcus thumbed at the wet rim while he sucked Matt's cock back into his mouth – he wanted him to come like this, down Marcus' throat and with a tease of what it'd be like to have Marcus fucking him. He pushed with his thumb, without ever breaching in, while doing his absolute best to give his boy the best blowjob he would ever receive. Ruin any other man for him, because none of them could please him like Marcus could. 

Matt was his now. Truly his, not like before.

And the boy was close, he could tell even before he gasped the words between moans. He nodded and hummed in acknowledgment, bobbing his head faster and taking Matt all the way in just as his legs started trembling and he came with a loud moan.

Matt had held on for as long as he could before he finally let go and came inside Marcus' throat, his back arching off the bed as the pleasure travelled through his whole body. It was the best orgasm of his life, it had never been like this – a slow built-up of pleasure, filling him up until he was overflowing with it and then exploded. He was pretty sure he lost a few seconds there, sent to another whole plane of existence, floating away somewhere, all thanks to the man between his legs, that then sucked him through his orgasm and stopped right before it got to be too much, pulling away slowly.

Matt had his eyes closed, but he whimpered and opened them at the loss of touch – only to see Marcus sitting on his heels looking at him with the loveliest smile he'd ever seen. He was pretty sure his heart skipped a beat.

Marcus grabbed both of Matt's hands still holding up his legs, and pulled them away, easing his legs back down. They were a little numb from holding the position for so long, but the older man massaged the life back on to them. Matt felt like he was in the clouds, in heaven, some place like that, lost in the bliss that was this bubble they had made for themselves. Marcus held himself above him, and kissed his lips gently, holding his face, caressing his hair, his arms, his waist – it felt so nice Matt could cry. He couldn't remember the last time he felt cared for like this. The last time he felt this loved.

"How are you feeling, bunny?" Marcus asked, laying now on his side next to him, an arm still around his waist and drawing circles on his skin.

"Like I'm in heaven." Matt answered, genuinely. He lifted his hand to touch Marcus' cheek, feeling the prickle of his beard and the softness of his skin. He loved the contrast. "I loved it."

Marcus chuckled, leaning in to steal a quick peck. "I'm so happy to hear that. I wanted it to be perfect for you. Wanted to treat you like my little prince today."

Matt blushed, feeling flustered at the man's words. After everything they'd just done, sweet words like these still made him blush. The power this man had over him had to be studied. "Thank you, Marcus." He circled his arm around the brunet's neck, and pulled himself closer, chest to chest, in a hug. Marcus held him back, arms tightening around his waist.

Matt could feel that Marcus was still hard, his erection pressed against his leg. He was so greatful that the older man had given him his time to recover from the absolutely mind-blowing orgasm he'd put him through, but Matt wanted this to end with both of their pleasures. He wanted Marcus to feel good too, and above all, he wanted to be the reason he felt so. 

And, after all that, the man sure deserved a reward. 

Matt kissed Marcus one more time, before pulling back. "How about you?"

Marcus swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing with it. "You don't have to do anything. Like I said, I wanted to pleasure you, and that's what I did. You don't have-"

"I know." Matt cut him off, smiling as he caressed Marcus' cheek with his thumb. "But I want to. I want to... make you come." The frown between the older man's eyebrows eased a little bit, and his hand previously on Matt's waist travelled down, stopping on his ass, and squeezing. Matt barely held back a whimper. "Can I touch you?"

"Go ahead, bunny." He answered, his voice low and teasing. Matt bit his lip, feeling Marcus squeeze his ass again. The man really liked his ass it seemed. Matt wouldn't complain about that-

(The feeling of his tongue going in and out, teasing his rim, his finger threatning to go in... Matt was gonna have dreams about Marcus fucking him, that was for sure.)

Matt pulled away a little bit so he could look down at the erection previously pressed against his leg. Marcus had gone a little soft, but was somehow still hard after all of this. Matt had already figured, from the way he had humped the bed while eating him out, that he got off off doing it, but now he was certain. And he was big, bigger than Matt at least, big enough that when Matt finally circled his fingers around it, his fingertips almost didn't touch. 

Marcus took a sharp breath in, and started kissing Matt's neck, inhaling his scent, licking the sweat off his skin, while the younger man worked his hand up and down his length. He hummed in approval of the boy's actions, who in return seemed to get more confident in his movements. Matt had never given anyone a handjob – but he'd done it enough times on himself to know what felt good. At least to him. What Marcus prefered, he'd learn along the way.

"Matt-" Marcus moaned his name, low and growly right next to his ear, and Matt could feel his own cock gain some interest again. He squeezed in an upwards motion, before smearing the wetness over the head, just to hear Marcus moan again. His voice was sinful, groaning in his ear, as his hand grabbed Matt's thigh, pulling it over his hip. "You're doing amazing, baby."

Matt felt the compliment wash over him, relishing in it. He liked it, when Marcus told him he did good, that he was a good boy. God, he really wanted to satisfy Marcus. He wanted to be the only one making him this hard and leaking, wanted to be the one that made him growl and hump the bed like a fucking animal, wanted to be the name he moaned like this.

With the hand that wasn't working on his cock, Matt pulled Marcus face away from his neck so he could kiss him, shoving his tongue in his mouth, wanting to taste him, to feel him, to never part their lips ever again. 

It didn't take much longer afterwards, Marcus having already been so on edge from the time he spent negleting his cock. The older man came with a loud groan, white spurts of cum covering Matt's hand and a little of his belly. The boy's eyes we're fixated on it, commiting the image to his memory, just like he wanted to comit the sound Marcus made when he came. Matt was trembling and breathing fast and half-hard. Just from seeing the man orgasm. Fuck.

Marcus swiped his hair away from his sweaty forehead to leave a kiss in there, before pulling the younger towards him in a hug. Matt rested his head against the man's chest, both listening and feeling the way his heart was hammering. Just like his was. 

"Thank you, bunny. You did so well." Marcus whispered, petting his sandy brown hair. Matt sighed, happily.

"I enjoyed doing it. It was... Really hot, to watch you come." Matt looked down at his hand, still covered in the man's cum. He did that.

Marcus laughed, lightheartedly, and kissed the top of his head. "I could say the same about you, bunny."

They stayed in each other's arms for a couple more minutes before Marcus got up, coaching Matt to do the same so they could go clean up in the en suite bathroom. Cleaned up and dressed, the pair shared a couple more kisses against the closed bedroom door, too distracted by each other to be able to make it out of the room. It was like the past few weeks of built-up desire had catched up to them and now they had to make up for all those times they didn't kiss, even though they both had desperately wanted to.

Finally out of the room, they made their way to the living room couch, where Matt had asked for them to just cuddle for a little bit more before Bill and the men arrived with his things and he had to go make himself at home in his new room. His room. In Marcus' home. 

He had a place in Marcus' home. It was his home too, now.

And even though it was still morning, he felt himself doze off where he laid against Marcus' chest, the older man petting his hair and kissing the top of his head.

If you had told any of them two days ago that this was their new reality, their new lives, they wouldn't have believed you. It would've been too good to be true.

But it was. And as Matt felt asleep, Marcus soon followed, leaving it for Bill to wake the pair up when he arrived only an hour later.

Chapter Text

You could tell a lot about a person by seeing their bedroom. It was as if a piece of their soul had been materialized, contained between 4 walls. Or so Matt thought.

He could remember, the first time he saw Olivia's room – they were 9, still young enough that their parents wouldn't forbid a boy and a girl visiting each other's rooms. She had a hot pink accent wall covered in a mess of random stickers, and a white cat plushy she slept with to this day. He didn't make fun of her then, but he did when he secretly visited her room again, when they were 16, and Matt had ran away from Sebastian after a nasty fight that had ended with his cousin slapping him in the face for the first time.

The first of many.

And it had also been the first of many nights he spent laying down in a room that wasn't his, but which felt more like home and safety than his own could ever feel.

Perhaps his room was a piece of his soul, anyways. Empty, dark. The room he had moved to, when he was still too young to understand how his cousin had so much money at such a young age, when his mother had been poor her whole life. When he was a kid, he loved it – it was bigger than the one in his childhood home, and Sebastian had given him full control to do whatever he wanted with it.

But after he was forced into the mafia and became a prisioner in his own home, it didn't feel that way anymore. It felt closed up, always too hot or too cold, it felt dark and it felt scary. The whole house was unsafe. He didn't even have a key to his own room, he couldn't make it a safehaven – nowhere in the house was safe. And his walls stayed empty white, and his furniture was the bare minimum, and all Matt kept that was truly of value was a photo album from his childhood featuring his mother, and a couple of polaroids of him and his friends, especially Olivia, that he kept in a shoe box under his bed.

And now, Matt held the box in his lap. He was thinking about putting the pictures up somehow, in his new room, so they'd be displayed instead of hidden. He thought about inviting Olivia one day, so she'd see it. See a piece of his soul like he'd seen hers. His one true sibling – who he had put in harm's way. And yet, she still cared for him, texted him relentlessly to make sure he was okay staying with Marcus. Telling him, that her house was always open for him – that he didn't have to stay with Marcus just because he didn't have a house. Like he had to with Sebastian.

And he assured her, it wasn't the same. He wasn't staying out of fear. Not a single bone in his body feared Marcus Gravano. What compelled him to stay... It was something else. A want, a need he couldn't yet name. 

The good thing about not having much, was how easy it was setting up his new room. He recovered all his clothes, yet Marcus still insisted in them going shopping afterwards, so Matt could buy anything he wanted, including other personal products and even some food he liked.

He was so greatful, obviously, but at the same time, it didn't feel right. He didn't have any money to pay back. Hadn't it been for Marcus, he'd have no money to buy food for himself. He had no house, no job, and an impossible to pay debt towards Marcus. Marcus, who was now spending even more money on him.

It didn't feel right. It almost made it look weird... Like Marcus was his sugar daddy or something.

He grimaced at the thought. He hated it. Especially now that they had gotten intimate with each other... It made it feel like sex work. Like he was a prostitute Marcus kept around in his castle.

That had to change.

"I want to get a job." Matt commented, on day 4 of living in Marcus' house. They were having a nice dinner in, nicely cooked by Marcus himself. Matt couldn't cook to save his life, but the older man promised to teach him some. "I can't be dependent on you. I need to have my own money."

Marcus nodded, cleaning his mouth with a napkin before speaking. "I agree. I'm here to help you in whatever you need, especially in this time of your recently-gained freedom. Yet, for you to be truly free, you need your own money, as you said. I think it's an excellent idea. Do you have any ideas on what you'd like to do?"

Matt thought about it. When he was a kid, he had wanted to be an astronaut, then a veterinarian, then a zookeeper. And as a teen, biology had been his favorite subject. But Sebastian had wanted him to go work for him full time after he finished highschool, so he never got the chance to go to college. And he never had a job besides thief and liar.

Professional rat. He should write that on his CV.

"I don't know. I guess I could go job hunting around the city, start with something close-by. It's my first... Real job, if you know what I mean."

"That's good, bunny. But find something you like – enough of being forced into a job you hate, don't you think?"

Matt chuckled, shaking his head. "Couldn't agree more."

And that was that. The next day, after a quick goodbye kiss from Marcus, Matt made his way out the door and towards the bus stop. Marcus had offered for Bill to drive him around because he'd be busy today so he couldn't do it himself, but Matt declined – Bill wasn't exactly found of him, and neither was Matt found of the henchman. He didn't blame Bill, the man was fiercely loyal to Marcus, and really protective of him, and he had correctly sensed that Matt had been up to no good in the beginning. But now, even after everything, he still couldn't spare even the faintest of smiles towards Matt. So, no thanks, he'd rather take the bus.

They lived in a fancier side of town now, compared to where Sebastian lived, so he was hoping he could find a well paying job that wasn't terrible to do. He wanted to be making enough money so that two months from now he'd be comfortable enough to not depend on Marcus at least for food. 

Two months from now... Thinking about the future made him anxious, especially when it came to their unnamed relationship. They weren't dating. There hadn't been an "official" proposing of any sorts. They had just confessed they liked each other and wanted to stay together, they started kissing and... did other stuff, but they didn't call each other boyfriends or ever said they were dating.

Matt wasn't even sure people Marcus' age did that. Was that normal, for Marcus? To just like... start dating without saying anything? Marcus was the one with experience after all. 

But maybe... The part of Matt that was still, and perhaps would always be, deeply insecure, told him that maybe Marcus didn't want to date him. He had just cancelled his marriage only a few days ago... Maybe he wasn't ready for another relationship.

And... Matt could be ok with that. Could try to be ok with that. Yes, he had never felt this way for someone... and he had never wanted to be someone's boyfriend so bad. But, for Marcus, he'd wait. They were together most of the time, and they did kiss freely whenever they wanted to so... Maybe that was ok. He could wait.

(He didn't allow himself to think about the possibility that Marcus could decide that he'd never want to date him. That it was a casual thing, and as casual things go, it would soon reach its expiration date.)

His first stop was a coffee shop. As cliché as it sounded, it was the likeliest place for him to find a job, as a 20 year old who never worked before. And if he could pick locks and shoot guns, then learning how to cashier and make beverages couldn't be that difficult, right?

Except they weren't accepting any new staff, as told him the store manager after he'd asked. Ok, thank you, have a good day.

There were more coffee shops in the city anyways.

No? Oh, ok, thanks, have a good day.

No, I don't have any experience. What? Oh... Yeah, thank you. Have a good day.

Yeah I'm new. Uh... I've made coffee at home. Yeah, yeah.... Well, thanks anyways. Have a good day.

No, I don't.... Ok. Thank you.

No coffee shops then. Matt crossed the street to get into a grocery store, but they weren't hiring either. It made him even more frustated, passing by the cashiers and seeing they were all around his age. As were the people stocking the shelves. He should be one of them. A normal young adult with a normal job. Why couldn't he have that? Some semblance of normalcy in his life? Something he hadn't had since he was 10 years old. 

The walk back to the bus stop was embarassing, with tears pooling in his eyes, tears he felt too stubborn to spill. Crying because he couldn't get a fucking job. Crying because all he was good for was serving a man who was now dead and rotting underground. 

Almost out of hope for himself, Matt spotted on the street corner ahead of the bus stop a store sign he hadn't seen before. Taking the risk of missing his bus, he decided to walk up to it to check it out, following whatever sudden curiosity had sparked inside of him.

It was a pet store.

And right there, on the front window, was a sign that read "Now hiring! Come join us."

Matt couldn't contain his happiness as he wiped his cheeks clean of any tears and entered the shop with the brightest smile on his face, a bell above the door chiming. At the front desk was a woman with straight black hair and bangs, and a shirt with a black and white cat pattern. Her name tag let him know that was Julia, Store Manager. This had to be it.

"Uh, hi! My name is Matt. I saw you are hiring?" He approached Julia, feeling a bit more insecure now. Afraid of the rejection. Afraid he got his hopes up for no reason.

But Julia looked up from her computer and smiled at him, dimples adorning her chubby cheeks. "Hey, Matt! Yes, we absolutely are. We just opened this week and are still a little understaffed. More people seem to love our store than we were expecting." She joked. "So, are you looking for a job?"

Matt cleared his throat, fingers playing nervously with the ends of his sleeves. "Yeah! It's my first job and I've been looking around and so far, no luck."

Julia cooed at him, but unlike what Matt was used to, her sympathy seemed genuine, and not like she was making fun of him. "I feel for you, Matt. I've been there. And it was because someone gave me a chance that I was able to start working and now, I finally opened my own store."

Matt raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You're the owner?" 

Julia laughed. "Yeah. But that sounded a little meh on the name tag, so I went with manager. It's technically true as well. And I do some shifts as a cashier. Or should I say... I did some shifts. Now that you're here, you could be our new cashier, if you're interested?" She arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow, leaning a little over the desk in expectation.

Here it was. His chance. His normalcy. His new beginning.

"Yes! Yes, I'd like that very much, thank you so much-"

"Hey, calm down!" Julia raised her hands, laughing as she then reached below the desk to grab a paper sheet, and offered it to Matt, who eagerly took it. "Fill out this form. If you bring it to me tomorrow, I'll get you working the next day." 

Matt thought he'd start crying any moment again. This time, though, for a totally different reason. "Thank you so much, Julia. I'll bring it first thing in the morning. And I promise I won't disappoint you."

"You got it, buddy. I can see it in you, that you're a hard working boy. See you tomorrow?" She extended her hand for a handshake.

Matt smiled, gladly shaking her hand. "See you tomorrow."

Although Matt did end up losing that one bus, it was infinitely worth it. He texted Olivia and Marcus as soon as he sat down on the next bus, telling them about his new job at the pet store. Olivia was happy for him, joked that this might be her sign to finally get the pet of her dreams (a white cat, just like her plushie), and use Matt for discounts at the store. He shook his head in amusement as he typed back, smiling the whole way back home. He loved Olivia.

Marcus didn't answer, but that was ok. He did say he was going to be busy today, whatever it was that he did – Matt wasn't very sure to be honest. He knew that it wasn't drugs, and it wasn't human trafficking – the horrible stuff Sebastian dealt with, and had wanted Marcus to join him in, because Marcus' clan ruled the richest neighbourhood in the city, and so, owned the richest costumers. 

Matt also knew he owned a club. The club where Dan had almost taken the three of them out with a fucking bomb, all because Sebastian had told him to.

Matt would never have done that. He'd never put Dan's life in risk like that. But he was starting to see that the way he cared for Dan, was different from the way Dan cared for him. And it hurt. When Matt was forced to join the clan, Dan had been the only person there to ever have a kind word or gesture for him. He'd insist to be the one training Matt so he knew Matt wouldn't be used as a punching bag for the other goons. They grew close, Matt confiding in him, Dan helping him sneak out of Sebastian's house multiple times. Yet, his loyalty to Sebastian seemed to always come first when it truly mattered.

He didn't know, how long Dan had been under Sebastian's claws, how he got there in the first place. He tried having empathy, tried understanding – and yet, he couldn't. It just felt like betrayal. And it had hurt him deeply.

The ride home soon was over and so Matt made his way to Marcus' house. Bill's car was parked in the front, along with another car he didn't know, but perhaps Marcus had arranged a meeting at his house or something. Matt would get in quietly just in case, he didn't want to disturb the older man while he was working. 

And yet, he was unable to supress the surprised gasp he let out at seeing Amanda, looking as gorgeous as always, walking out of Marcus' room.

Marcus' room, which used to be hers too. Marcus' room, where Matt had laid his body and his soul bare for Marcus to see, for Marcus to take. 

She came to a stop as soon as she saw him, and then laughed, bitter and mean. "Oh, don't worry, I'm on my way out. He's all yours now – that is, until someone else comes along and he gets tired of you." She sighed, waving her perfectly manicured nails at him. "Enjoy your fun while it lasts, you homewrecking whore. I hope it was worth it." And just like that, she stormed out of the house. 

Matt didn't know what to say, what to think, what to do. His vision got clouded with tears and he almost crumbled the form sheet in his hands. Marcus had been... Busy, with Amanda. In his room. 

Feeling the tears run down his cheeks, Matt entered his room and locked the door behind him – he didn't want Marcus to see him like this, and very honestly, he didn't want to see Marcus right now. He put his things down on the bedside table before toeing off his shoes and crawling under the covers of his bed.

He let himself cry freely for the first time today, his whole body shaking with each sob. He felt heartbroken, but at the same time, like he had no right to feel so. Marcus and him, they weren't dating. They were housemates that kissed, they didn't even sleep in the same room! Matt had no right to be angry, or sad, unlike Amanda, who had lost her future husband to a kid who got into their home to spy on him and who tried to kiss him under their own roof.

She was right. She was. And Matt had deluded himself to think that Marcus... That Marcus could maybe love him.

Foolish. Naive. Stupid.

Then there was a knock at the door. Matt didn't answer, however childish that was. He was allowed to be a little childish as he desperately tried to glue back the pieces of his heart that had been broken.

"Bunny." Came the dreaded voice, muffled by the door and the covers above Matt's head. "Can I come in?"

No, he said in his mind, but no words left his mouth. He imagined Marcus standing on the other side of the door, with his hair disheveled by manicured hands, his shirt still half unbuttoned. Did he mark her skin like he had done with Matt? Did he go down on her on those same black silky sheets like he did to him, that one morning?

Hell, they had done all that countless times before. He had probably fucked her in every room in the house, perhaps even in the same bed Matt now slept on. And Matt had no right to feel jealous of that. He was only getting a taste of the same poison he brought on Amanda first.

"Matt." Came the voice again. Marcus used his name very deliberately – he usually called him bunny, or more recently, baby. But when he really wanted to get Matt's attention, when he really wanted him to listen, to understand – he called him Matt. "Amanda came in just 10 minutes before you arrived. She was waiting for me at the gate when I got here after my meeting. She had left some earrings in my bathroom and came to retrieve them, scream at me a little more, and then leave. And that's when she came across you." Even through the door, Matt could hear Marcus sigh, could hear the nervousness in his voice. "Whatever else you might think happened, I can assured you, it didn't happen."

To Matt's own horror, he realized it made no difference to him. The damage was done – the other shoe fell. He was confronted with what he had done, to Amanda, to Marcus. To himself.

"Go away." He said, a little too weakly for Marcus to understand the exact words that were spoken. But he sure understood their meaning.

"I can leave you alone if that's what you want, bunny. But if that's what you think you deserve, I have to let you know that's not true."

The silence hung in the air as neither of them moved away or spoke. Matt let the words echo in his mind. Did he think he deserves to be left by Marcus? Did he think he deserves to never be loved? Did he feel guilty of Marcus' separation from his ex-fiancée?

Yes.

Did he want to talk this through and finally settle for once and for all the thoughts that have been plaguing him for the last five days? 

Yes.

Matt pulled away the covers, and got up from the bed. His shirt was crumpled and his hair was a mess, not to mention how red and puffy his face must be – but he didn't care. He needed Marcus, he needed to talk with him. He needed to know.

With a turn of the key, Matt unlocked the door and came face to face with Marcus. And, unlike what Matt had imagined, he looked perfect, wearing matching black slacks and suit jacket, a crisp white shirt with the first two buttons tastefully and purposefully left open by himself, this morning. Matt knew, he saw him wearing it like this in the morning. Not a hair out of place, no lipstick smudges or hickeys on his skin. No perfume of a woman lingering in him. Just the smell of his cologue, the one Matt daydreamed about everytime they were apart for more than 10 minutes.

He did go to a meeting. He didn't get back with Amanda.

Another one for the list of reasons why Matt is fucking stupid.

He cleared his throat, quickly swiping at his cheeks to dry any tears. "I'm sorry. I'm- I'm overreacting and you owe me no explanation." 

Marcus frowned, and his expression was all worry. Matt's stomach sank – he didn't want Marcus to feel bad for him. "You're not, bunny. I know what it looked like, and what you must've felt like. Can I come in so we can talk?"

Matt simply nodded, making way for Marcus to get in before closing the door behind them, and going to sit on the bed, hugging his knees to his chest with his back leaning on the headboard. Marcus sat on the side of the bed, giving him a little space. 

"I believe you, just so you know. I'm sorry I assumed you and Amanda had..." He trailed off. Marcus knew what he meant.

The older man nodded, before offering his hand, palm up, for Matt to take. He hesitated, before ultimately taking a hold of his hand, a small anchor, a small comfort. We're here. We're in this together.

"I..." Marcus started. It was rare, for him to be at such a loss of words. "I wronged Amanda. I'll always admit I did. We had been together for 3 years and it felt like getting married was the logical next step. I'm not exactly getting any younger-"

"You're not old." Matt felt the need to interrupt.

Marcus laughed, squeezing his hand. "Yeah, but you know. There's a certain pressure. Especially when it comes to... Heterosexual relationships. And Amanda wanted it, she kept mentioning it, asking when I would gain the courage to purpose. All while... While I was thinking about gaining the courage to break up. Yet, instead, I thought perhaps an engagement would really be the spark we needed. We went on a vacation and everything... Everything that took me to understand and accept the truth, which was that I didn't love her anymore." He sighed, his eyes travelling from Matt's to their locked hands. "But I once did. I really did. It just wasn't meant to be. But my inability to break it off, the way we dragged things... It made us bitter. Made us mean to each other. Sometimes she'd look at me and I could see it – even she didn't love me anymore. She just wanted this, this dream relationship. So she kept up the illusion for as long as she could. As did I." Marcus' looked up at Matt again, perhaps to see his reaction, try to read his thoughts. The boy only nodded in acknowledgment for him to continue. "So, no, bunny. We didn't break up because of you. We were doomed long before you ever showed up. You just... Made things clearer."

Matt frowned, confused. "What do you mean?"

"You made it easier. For me, who now was certain I had no more interest in staying with Amanda when I could... When I could be with you." He smiled, and Matt felt his heart skip a beat. "And for her, who was able to accept that, no, what we have isn't genuine anymore, and we'd be better if we parted ways."

Matt felt some of the unbearable invisible weight on his shoulders lift off. But yet, some guilt remainded. He sighed, pulling his hand free from Marcus', who looked every bit heartbroken by the gesture. "Amanda is still right about me. I... I wanted to kiss you, even when I knew you had a fiancée. I tried kissing you in your own house, with her in the next room."

Marcus frowned. "What do you mean she's right about you? What did she tell you?" He sounded protective, angry. 

"That... I'm a "homewrecking whore". Her exact words." He hid his face in his arms, the shame too great to look at Marcus now. Homewrecker. Whore. It was all true.

"I am the one who stayed with a woman I didn't love. I brought you inside the house. I..." Marcus hesitated. "I wasn't totally innocent when we sealed our deal. I felt attracted to you the moment we met. Your kiss... Lingered in my mind every moment. And everytime we were close, I could only think about kissing you again. Those... Cherry red lips." He joked, referencing Matt's cherry lipbalm Marcus loved, the one he was wearing when they first kissed. "And I almost gave in. When you leaned to kiss me. I wanted to, so bad. I didn't want Amanda. I wanted you. And I made you feel responsible for taking care and worring for a relationship that wasn't yours. If anything, I'm the whore."

That got a little huff of a laugh out of Matt, who looked up from his arms to see Marcus looking at him, eyes full of hope, and extended his hand again. Matt laughed, wet with the tears falling from his eyes again, and this time when he took the older's hand, he pulled him forward, pulled him closer, so Marcus got at kissing distance and he could hold his face and join their lips. 

When they parted, Marcus pressed his forehead to Matt's, and held both his hands in his. Matt let himself relax, let himself have this – guilt free. He was not responsible for any failing soon-to-be marriages. He just got here on time to witness it fail. 

"Are we dating?" He asked, because fuck that. He wanted this man to be his. Like he had never wanted anything so bad in his life.

Marcus pulled away a little so he could look him in the eyes, brown meeting blue. "Are you asking me to be your boyfriend, Matt?" He asked, amused.

"If I was... Would you say yes?" Matt asked back, his heart in his throat.

Marcus barely answered with a whispered but firm Yes before he was pulling Matt in for a kiss, one hand holding the side of his face, the other one on the back of his neck. Matt grabbed the lapels of his suit jacket, feeling the need to mess him up, to unravel him, so anyone who looked at him right now would know what they've been doing, and that it had been Matt the one to do it. No one else. 

He taggled his fingers in Marcus' hair as he deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring the older man's mouth, relishing in his taste, his presence, his touch. Marcus' hand travelled from his nape to his neck, not squeezing, but holding him there, and Matt let out a muffled moan. Marcus pulled back, but kept his hold on his neck firm. His lips were red and his hair was a mess.

Good.

"I have the prettiest boyfriend." Marcus commented, eyes travelling between Matt's eyes and his lips. "I'm sorry I didn't ask before. I've been wanting to, since you moved in. But I didn't want to pressure you."

Matt smiled, trying to focus on the heartfelt conversation at hand and not on how Marcus' hand on his neck was making heat pool in his lower belly. "It's ok. I was just... A little insecure with all of this. I thought perhaps you didn't like me like that."

Marcus chuckled, shaking his head a little. "We really need to get better at communicating, bunny. I really, really like you. And I'd say yes to you any day."

Matt felt his heart flutter, and he pulled the older man by his jacket to kiss him again. Yeah, they were idiots, idiots who should learn to talk to each other instead of overthinking things and spiraling down.

They kissed for a little bit, sharing gentle touches and caresses along the way, enjoying each other's presences. Marcus was Matt's boyfriend. The boy almost couldn't contain how giddy he felt, as he giggled between kisses.

They ended up with Marcus sitting with his back to the headboard, with Matt sitting between his legs, leaning on his chest. Marcus was kissing his hair, his neck, his shoulder – anywhere he could reach, really. He just couldn't get enough of the boy.

Matt remembered what he'd been doing before the whole Amanda fiasco, and picked up the form sheet from the bedside table, holding it in front of him. He felt Marcus' smile against the skin of his neck.

"Congrats, bunny. I know you'll do great." He said, and squeezed Matt tighter with his arms around the younger's waist. 

Matt relaxed further into the touch, feeling like he was in heaven. A job and a boyfriend? And not just "a boyfriend", but Marcus-

The man he lo- liked, liked a lot.

Later that day, after filling out the form and managing to put his polaroid pictures all up on the wall of his room, Matt facetimed Olivia to show it to her, and talked about everything that had happened today. The girl, although still a little unsure about Marcus and his intentions with her best friend, was so happy for Matt.

And Matt had never felt this happy as well.