Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

At the start of spring one year, a mermaid took his first swim in the world in the dark of the night. The water so still it looked like a mirror, an infinite number of stars glinting in both the sky and the blank surface. The only sound for miles was the moans of pain his mother let out as she pushed him into the world, the blood washing away in the water. Safely enclosed in the amniotic sac the babe stayed clean, before it broke free and swam into his mother’s waiting arms. His name was Park Seonghwa, named for the stars keeping his mother company. 

Later that same year, at the start of winter, another boy was born in darkness. In the deep forest a woman dressed in white was surrounded by her coven, fires licking up into the dark sky as they sang around her. Voices melding and rising together, deafening the cries of the woman in the center. Her flat stomach grew rapidly and she wailed out her fear and anguish, but most of all her delight. Shadows danced and flew around her as blood ran down her legs, tainting her dress and the ground beneath her. Between one moment and the next all light died, as if the shadows themselves had snuffed them out. The woman laid dead in the center, the child sobbing between her legs. They named him Hongjoong.

The next year at the start of yet another spring a boy was born into a loving family. The mother had labored for two days, the birth slow as it was her first. The father stayed by her side throughout, wiping her sweaty brow and feeding her soup as she labored. The sun was just peeking over the mountains when the babe took its first agonizing breath, wailing as he was pressed between his parents on the bed. They held him close, safe and cocooned, even if it wouldn’t last. They named him Yunho. 

That same summer a nobleman was born into a wealthy home. Sweltering heat and cloying perfume stole the air from the room, warmth swelling as the sun rose higher and higher in the sky. The father waited for the ordeal to finish in his study, showing little concern for the whole affair. On silk sheets the newborn took his first breath, swaddled and given to the nanny before his mother even pushed out the placenta. As the third son, a spare of a spare, his parents saw little use of him other than strengthening their bloodline. He spent most of his time alone in a house too large for him, loved more by the servants than his family. The only thing they gave him was his name, Yeosang. 

Mere weeks after, at the height of summer and the sun at its highest, a hunter gave birth far up on a mountain. Alone and terrified she pressed her fist to her mouth, afraid that even there, so far away from humans, someone would hear her. Someone would see. The cool air of the mountain eased her pain, a balm for her troubled mind. After a moment the boy was pushed out of her, still and quiet. She cut him free of the sack, free of his heritage, and pressed him to her chest. Safe for now, safe as long as she had him right there. She called him San, after their safe haven. 

A month later a woman screamed and screamed, voice cracking up. Many births she had experienced before, but it never became any easier. As the temperature sank with the sun, another son came from her body, tiny and pink and so utterly defenseless. She held him tight as fear and exhaustion filled her, dirty cloths swaddled around them both. Mere hours later she left him and his siblings alone with their father, suffocating as her body convulsed in death cramps. Shortly before she went where he could no longer meet her, she named him Mingi. 

In the biting cold of winter that year, just as the sun began to set, another boy arrived early in the world. His mother believed he wouldn’t make it, arriving weeks before he was supposed to, but turned out he was just in such a rush. He arrived full of life, screaming and wailing to show everyone how healthy he was, flopping his limbs around. His mother laughed and held her boy up, showing him off to her husband and first son, filled with pride at the noisy little thing. His name was Wooyoung. 

Jongho was born in water, as was customary for both sirens and mermaids. Still enclosed in the amniotic sac, he was rocked gently by the waves around him, his siren mom swimming nearby. Keeping watch as he drifted up to the surface, into the waiting arms of his human mother. 

He broke the sac with the sharp talons along his spine, instinct guiding him to swim to his human mother’s chest. 

«Oh Hae he’s beautiful,» Soonbok sighed, holding her wiggling baby to her cold chest. 

The biting wind ruffled her wet hair. Her skin was almost blue from the cold, ethereal looking in the moonlight. Hae came up to the surface, in human form before Soonbok even looked up at her. 

«We settled on Jongho, yeah?» Soonbok asked, tremors flitting across her body. 

Hae nodded, stroking a finger over Jongho’s chubby cheek. Before long he’d change form for the first time, permitting them to take Soonbok back into the heat of their house. He would cry before they would soothe him, the pain of transformation and breathing oxygen harsh for one so little. 

Jongho was born almost a full year after Wooyoung, though Hae had yet to see how these other births had anything to do with her son.

              _______________________

Choi Soonbok lived a quiet life, far away from the nearest village. The only reason she saw other people was to trade and buy necessities, preferring her solitude. Society had long ago marked her as odd, other, an outcast, turning its back on her. While she could have conformed, lived as they all wished, she had long ago found that she would rather be happy in her own company than in strangers. 

After the new true royal family stepped into place, long before Soonbok was born, society had become more frigid. Her grandma used to tell her stories of her childhood, filled with adventure and colors. Where creatures such as mermaids and dokkaebis would be sighted often. People sought magic out rather than rejected it. The people Soonbok met rarely believed in creatures other than humans anymore, stating that the magic that did exist was evil and had to be reported immediately. 

Soonbok longed to actually see some real magic. She’d never tell a soul about it but oh how she wished she could see. She had searched tirelessly when she was a child, for ghosts, for witches, for dragons. She had yet to meet something definite, though she would swear that she had encountered a forest nymph once. 

Sustaining herself had become her main priority when she became an adult. There was no time for searching for creatures when you had to keep food on the table and heat in your house. Though she would always linger at the seashore and in the forest, hoping that if she stood still enough something would dare to come out for her to witness. 

One day, when she made it home from the market, she heard a song. Faint, melodious, haunting. She stopped in her tracks, slowly letting her bags slip onto the ground beneath her. The voice promised answers, to what happened to magic, what became of Soonbok's mother. Of if there was a love out there for her. 

She walked slowly down the hill, heading straight for the ocean. The sun was starting to set, casting a long shadow after Soonbok as she stepped on the beach, listening, waiting. She felt calm, surprisingly so. The song whispered that she had to step into the water, come far out from shore. Then she would get all the answers she needed.

The water was cold, not freezing but cold enough for goosebumps to rise along Soonbok’s skin. Her skirt flowed up around her as she went further and further out. Soon the water reached her chin. Her teeth chattered, breath ragged and shallow, but she continued to swim out from shore. 

She let herself sink beneath the waves, body lax and eyes wide open. The salt stung, but the song was louder, closer, and she couldn’t afford to not meet the thing calling for her. In everything between a second and a minute, she waited. 

Then, something moved closer to her in the depths. Something long, dark, and fast. Soonbok thought idly, -like she was looking at the situation and not living it, that she should be more scared. That she should feel something other than the calm she felt. The tranquility. The awe.

The being circled her, and she realized idly that it was what was singing to her. Lured her to the deep. Soonbok was running out of breath, but not once did she try to reach the surface. The thing stopped in front of her and Soonbok couldn’t help the smile her face broke out into. 

A mermaid. An actual mermaid. Or, maybe it was a siren? She didn’t actually know the difference. All she knew was that it was no shark or regular fish.

The face was long, with sharp cheekbones and so pale it looked blue. It had fins where the ears would be on a human, moving with the current around them. Or maybe it moved them to sense vibrations with them? The hands only had four fingers, with webbed skin and claws, taloned fins at the elbow joints and up to its shoulder. Every inch was covered in scales in varying sizes, tail long and black as the night with a paler underbelly. The gills were on the side of its ribcage, moving steadily as it breathed. 

Soonbok couldn’t tell if it was male or female, did mermaids have genders? It had long hair, way past its waist, that was both blue and white. Though the hair length didn't tell Soonbok much. Maybe mermen had long hair too? Though the most piercing thing about it was its eyes. 

Pale as milk, like it was blind, slanted pupils all that told her it could see at all. They were big, much bigger than was usual in a human face, almost bulging out of its head. A faint glow seemed to emit from them.  

It smiled at Soonbok, revealing a gigantic mouth full of razor sharp teeth. 

Hello little human. It spoke in her mind. You’re way too cute to eat. 

That was the first time Soonbok met Hae. 

            _______________________

When Jongho was five, he flew for the first time. He’d snuck away from his Eomma, waddling along the hills, thumb stuck in his mouth. His Mommy was away again, but he wanted to show her the pretty shell he’d found yesterday. His Eomma always got so sad when Mommy left so he didn’t wanna bother her. He was a big boy, he could find Mommy all on his own. 

His Eomma had braided his hair today, a thin little thing almost sticking straight out of his head like a tail. His hair was dark like hers, though when he changed it would often turn red. Or when it got long like it had now, the ends would redden so his hair was both black and red, almost like his fish tail. He loved when Eomma braided him, gentle hands so careful so it wouldn’t hurt. Eomma was always careful, though when she was mad she would press her hands hard over his ears so he didn’t hear the mean words she’d yell into the wind. 

«Jongho!» he heard his Eomma shout, voice carrying down the hills. «Where are you?» 

He picked up his pace. Mommy was usually by the sea, if he got there maybe Mommy would be there waiting for him. He clutched the shell in his tiny fist, making sure he didn’t drop it. They could swim for more shells if he found her it would be so fun. They could bring them to Eomma and she would be so so happy. 

«Jongho, you know Eomma gets scared when she doesn’t know where you are!» His mother yelled again. «Where are you little fish?» 

He smiled at the nickname. Jongho loved when he turned into a fish, it was funny. Though he wished it wouldn’t hurt so, but his Mommy said it was growing pains. It would get better when he was all big like his mothers. He hoped so, then he could turn all the time, even in the bath. 

«Jongho!» his Eomma screamed, startling him. She was so much closer now. 

He turned, lower lip wobbling. Eomma sounded angry now. It was scary. She was running down toward him. Her long skirts flowed in the wind behind her, short hair loosened from the tiny bun she usually kept it in. She looked scared, eyes glued to him. 

Jongho stumbled, and suddenly he was falling. He screamed as his tummy tangled up in knots when the ground disappeared beneath him. It was the cliff, he’d gone the wrong way. The way to the beach was on the other side. This was where he was never allowed to go alone because of the sharp cliffsides. He was falling straight down onto the rocks below and Eomma couldn’t help him. 

Pain erupted throughout his whole body. Everything felt yucky and wrong and he flapped his arms uselessly to make it go away. Only they were not arms anymore. 

They were wings, with black feathers. He looked down and his feet had become bird claws, the shell clutched in one of them. He was a bird. He was flying.

 «Jongho!» 

Jongho looked down to see Eomma standing at the edge of the cliff he’d fallen off. She was crying, hands fisted tightly in her hair. Her eyes were glued to the rocks beneath them, searching for him. 

«Eomma!» Jongho yelled, getting scared again. He didn’t like being so far up. He didn’t like when Eomma cried. «Help Eomma!»

His Eomma looked up, gasping when she saw him. 

«Jongho?» She yelled. «What…» 

He fell again. He didn't want to be up so high, he wanted to be with Eomma. 

Jongho crash landed into her, Soonbok catching him by instinct. From the tips of his shoulders and up he was the usual five year old, braid and all. Below he looked almost no different than a really big crow. Or maybe a raven. 

His Eomma covered his ears, though he could feel the vibrations of her words in her chest.  pressed his face in the crook of her neck, finally starting to sob messily. He didn’t want to be a bird and he didn’t want Eomma to be mad at him. 

«Aigoo Eomma's little baby,» Eomma shushed him, long fingers stroking gently over his feathers. «That was pretty scary for both of us huh?» 

She carried him back to their home, humming softly to him as she walked. He awkwardly tried to cling to her with his wings, crying louder when they just flapped uselessly. He didn’t like being a bird. 

Later, when Mommy came home, she helped him turn back to his human form. She explained that turning into a bird was something people like them could do sometimes. It was rare, and something he would have to keep extra secret, even from others like them. She almost seemed sad when she told him, like she wished he hadn’t inherited that trait at all. Though she smiled brighter than the sun when Jongho showed her the shell. 

            _______________________

As he grew older Jongho learned all sorts of things. When he was seven he started having funny dreams. He dreamt about where Eomma hid his sweets and when he woke up they were in that exact place. He dreamt about his Eomma with a round belly, writing names down on a paper, the name Jongho circled. When he asked about it his Eomma got a funny look on her face. 

He dreamt about strangers too, about other women that weren't his mothers and other children. He dreamt about a boy older than him being very mean and punching an adult, making blood run red and hard. He didn’t like that dream, it was yucky. 

When he was eight he had gotten so good at running he was faster than even his Eomma. Mommy said that as a siren, he’d have a stronger body, more flexible, than most humans. That his senses would be stronger as well, meant for hunting. Though Jongho didn’t know what he would need to hunt for, his mothers made all his yummy meals. 

When he was nine he got so good at imitating that he could imitate his mommy so well his Eomma actually thought it was her. The sounds around him were easy to make back if he really thought about it, almost like he was an echo. It was really funny, he could even talk to birds if he wanted to. Though he didn’t understand what they said, but it was still fun to pretend. 

His transformations got easier as he grew as well. Now he could turn parts of him to what he wanted, almost without having to think about it. His mom told him that when he was an adult he could even change his own appearance if he wished, though it would take a lot out of him. Jongho didn’t want that yet though. He liked how he looked, so much like his Eomma. Though Eomma said he was most like his mom. 

There were many things Jongho found confusing. Like how secret all of his abilities were. How he was never allowed to come with his Eomma when she went to the market. Never allowed to meet other little kids, or any humans really. Or how Mom would leave and come back after a few days or even weeks, never telling where or why she went. 

All his mothers would say was that the world was dangerous and they’d tell him more some day. 

One day when he was thirteen, his mom sat him down on the beach to have a serious talk with him. She explained more about what they were, and why he was so important to keep secret. That he was rare because he grew up with his human parent, that he spent so much time out of the sea. That he was different because he wasn’t part of any siren community.  

Originally sirens like them only had their bird form, but as time went on they evolved because of a need to hide in the sea, most losing their wings after some time. Their closest relatives, the mermaids, later sprung from them, and usually you couldn't immediately tell the difference between them when a siren was in its mermaid form. But they were not the same species. 

Sirens had the gift of sight. The things that were, had been, and even things yet to come. A powerful siren could with only one look see what a soul most yearned for, and then lure the soul to it to be consumed. Sirens had mostly hunted in groups before, their combined song a stronger lure and an easier way to get bigger meals. 

Mermaids could also transform into humans. Though they could never stray far from the ocean, needing to change back into their original form or suffer grave sickness, even death. They couldn’t mimic, or change their appearance, but just as sirens they were intersex. They didn’t eat people, and were more in touch with the sealife. Their song healed instead of lured. 

Jongho had been appalled when he learned of luring. He didn’t want to eat anyone. The thought made his insides churn. But when he told his mom this she only smiled sadly at him. 

«I didn’t either Jongs,» She sighed. «But when you become an adult you will have to. If you wait too long the hunger will consume you and you’ll eat anyone. Even the people you love.» 

Hae went on to explain that he wouldn’t have to eat human flesh often, once every six months would suffice. Though, eating so little would also weaken him. Transforming would be more painful, luring almost impossible. His sight would continue to be sporadic and not something he could control. 

«Do you eat often?» he asked after the silence had stretched for some time, almost afraid to know the answer. 

«Not since long before you were born.» His mother stroked her hand hesitantly through his hair. «We are a cursed species Jongho, the beings we need to consume are the only ones that we can have children with. Mermaids are the same, and in these times, we are going extinct.» 

His mother had grown up with other sirens, but one after another they had been plucked. The hunt for magical creatures had begun long ago, sirens getting caught only to never be seen again. Lost forever. All magic was hunted, and if humans weren’t careful, it would disappear forever. 

«Some humans are greedy Jongho,» Hae said. «They will stop at nothing to get what they want, even if they already have plenty.» 

So Jongho listened, his moms never leading him astray before. Even in human form he could still be identified as a siren, vast markings adorning his skin. His mom told him most believed the patterns were scars from transforming, swirls and spirals and faint scales. Though not eyecatching, someone who knew would be able to identify them. 

«That is the one good thing about the constant propaganda about magic,» his Eomma said, tracing one of them fondly. «Most people don’t even know what to look for.»

When Jongho was fifteen he finally got to go with his Eomma to the market, under the promise that he’d never leave her side. However, should they run into problems she had made him swear to escape and leave her behind if she told him to. 

The market was loud, and stuffy, and people smelled funny. Within minutes he was tired and wanted to go home, but also ecstatic over finally meeting other people. He stayed quiet as he trailed after his Eomma, soaking it all in like a sponge. 

At first, everything was going okay. Then they got to the square. A group of people had gathered around, and his Eomma suddenly froze, the hand holding his wrist hard as steel. 

«Oh no,» his Eomma whispered. 

It was an execution. A woman was tied to a pole, silent tears falling down her cheeks. A man was riling the masses up, spewing that the woman had let herself be seduced by a demon, becoming a witch. That she had tried to taint them all to the ways of sin and depravity, marking them all for the underworld. The town would be cleansed when she was burned, saving them all. 

Jongho wanted to leave, but Soonbok stopped him. 

«Look at her Jongho,» she whispered. «She needs someone to see her last moments that hold no hatred for her.» 

«Is she actually a witch?» Jongho asked. 

«No. Then she would’ve been given to the authorities, not burned in this tiny town.» his Eomma looked around them. «This is what happens to outsiders Jongho. They get used, and then murdered to spread control and fear.» 

She squeezed his hand as he felt horror well up in his chest. This was awful, how could people be privy to this and not try to stop it?

«Remember this Jongho,» His Eomma said. «Remember this feeling of helplessness. Of despair. Remember and think. Who is the real enemy?» 

The woman screamed when the flames took her. 

Jongho got to come to the market if he wanted to after that, though he mostly declined. 

When Jongho was sixteen he dreamt about his mom’s death. He saw her get trapped in a net, dragged onto the deck of a ship. He saw the pirates hold her down and cut into her tail, blood seeping into the wood. He watched how they leered at her when she had to transform to breathe, naked and wounded at their feet. He heard the profanities they spewed. How they spoke of her like cattle, how their hands strayed freely over her body. Jongho watched as his mom cursed them before she grabbed one of their guns, and shot herself. Limp body falling to the floor when the back of her skull blew off and smeared one of the pirates with her blood and brain.  

Jongho woke up screaming. Violent sobs wrecked through his body as he yanked at his hair, unable to take in enough air. His Eomma was there in a matter of moments. Or was it seconds? He couldn’t remember. She tried to comfort him, tried to get him to tell her what happened. 

When he finally calmed down enough to tell her, her face crumbled, head shaking vigorously. She insisted it didn’t have to be, that it was only a possible outcome. Maybe it hadn’t happened yet. But Jongho knew she didn’t believe it. Neither of them did. 

And they were right. Because his mom didn’t come home. Not ever again.

            _______________________

Jongho was long past seventeen when he first ate a human. The hunger had ravaged though his body for weeks. No matter how much food his Eomma gave him he was starving. Without even realising it he would turn his teeth into his canines, eying their chickens with a lustful stare. 

«Jongho-yah,» Soonbok called for him, startling him out of his trance. The loss of Hae had aged her, her body more tired, more wrinkled. Though she would always be Jongho’s beautiful Eomma. «I think it’s time.»

He didn’t want to, he’d never wanted to. The thought made him sick to his stomach, but at the same time couldn’t forget his mom’s words. If he waited too long, the hunger would consume him. He could risk eating Eomma. 

If that were to happen Jongho wouldn’t be able to live with himself. 

That night he went for a swim, warring emotions inside of him. If he thought too long about what he was about to do he’d start retching, but on the other side he was just so hungry. Everything and anything looked appetizing at that point. Even his own two hands. 

Jongho swam to a nearby harbor Eomma had shown him on a map, hoping this would go smoothly and effortlessly. The docks were silent when his head surfaced, turning only his head human. His plan was just to take a lonely fisherman, making the death fast and painless. This didn’t have to be more messy than it had to be. 

He started making his way toward one of the smaller boats. Then his whole body locked in place. Tied to the docks, only a little way away from him, was a hauntingly familiar ship. The pirate ship that took his mom. 

Jongho didn’t even get to think. Between one moment and the next he was right by the ship, inspecting it. Claws replace his tail, wings his arms. He flew to where the pirates’ lookout had fallen asleep, flask clutched weakly in his hand. 

It was a young man, not many years older than Jongho. He had stood in the back when Hae had been brought on deck, scared and thrilled at the same time. Jongho ripped his throat out with his teeth. 

When asked later, Jongho couldn’t say he remembered the taste. Instinct took over and all he could remember was the feeling of finally being full, being sustained. The power that came with every sloppy bite. 

After the watch had been taken a few bites out of  went below deck, starving for more. Most of the pirates slept soundly in their hammocks, never even seeing Jongho coming. He moved through them like a shadow, leaving bloodied footprints in his wake. The blood had been smeared all over his face and chest, hands soaked in the sticky liquid. 

One by one the pirates got chomped. Most of them never woke up, still asleep when Jongho bit into their jugular. 

However, some of them did wake up. They were the first people Jongho lured. One he changed himself into their lost love, one he told about what happened to their dad. 

The captain was last. Him Jongho did not even eat. The pirate didn’t even deserve to be food. All he deserved was his worst nightmares come to life. With the amount of people Jongho had eaten, the filthy captain was an open book. 

The captain was a man in his forties and had spent most of his life trampling on anything and anyone to gain power. He thrived on the pain of others and kept his men in check through fear and desperation. He had sold Hae’s corpse to three different aristocrats, to be eaten or hung on display, it didn’t matter to him. 

Ironically, the captain’s biggest fear was drowning. So Jongho tied him up to the anchor and dropped him in the sea while he was awake. Wide eyes stared at Jongho, pleading with him without words. Useless. Jongho wouldn't spare him.

He stood there, watching as the sea stilled, the taste of metal turning sharp on his tongue. The blood was drying on his naked skin, scratchy and dirty.  

Jongho didn’t regret it, not really. But it hadn’t made him happy either. He felt weirdly empty considering the amount he had eaten, but he knew that it wasn’t really a physical feeling. The slaughter hadn’t made him miss his mom any less. 

Not that it mattered. He’d killed some of his enemies, he’d avenged his mother. He hated pirates. He would never forgive a single one of their kind. Even if it tore him up inside. 

               _______________________

Eomma hadn’t been happy about the deaths, but that had been because of the risk rather than the action itself. Jongho was surprised. He had expected her to be disgusted with him. 

«You knew more about their sins than I do Jongho-yah,» She said as she detangled his hair with a comb. Newly washed to get the blood out of it. «But before you do something like that again, please think about who you wanna be. You are our legacy, and I will always love you, but I want you to love yourself as well.» 

Jongho stayed silent, lips pressed tight together. It brought him some comfort, to know the men responsible for the death of his mom were no longer out there to kill someone else’s mother. It was comforting to know that there were fewer pirates out there. 

However, the knowledge that he was capable of that kind of violence was a heavy burden to bear. Maybe what actually bothered him was how little the horror weighed on him. He’d seen how the pirates had seen him, naked with clawed hands and sharp teeth, covered in their friends' blood. Like a monster. It hadn’t just made him feel disgusting. It had also made him feel… powerful. 

«Do you think I’m a monster?» he asked after a while, afraid of looking at his Eomma. 

«We are all capable of great monstrosities, Jongho,» She reached down and grabbed his hand. «Everyones behavior makes sense to them. Sometimes it is because they are inhumane, sometimes because they don’t know any better. I can’t judge you for what I myself might have done in your shoes.» 

She turned his head towards her. Gentle fingers stroking over his cheek. A motion she had done for as long as he could remember. 

«I look at you, and I see the baby who refused to sleep anywhere other than my chest. I see the six year old who saved a crab from seagulls. I see the eight year old who followed me like a shadow when he learned the gravity of death, afraid of losing me.» She smiled, tears welling in her eyes. «I see my beautiful son, the best of me and the best of Hae. To me, you could never be a monster.» 

Jongho let himself be held, letting Eomma's words sink into him. He somehow doubted she’d say the same if she’d seen the depths of what  had committed. Some of the pirates, despicable as they were, had families that loved them like his Eomma loved him. Just or not, it wasn’t a good thing he’d done. 

«Have you ever hurt anyone, Eomma?» he asked. 

«Yes,» She answered without hesitation. «Some accidental and some on purpose. Everyone makes mistakes, Jongho.»  

«Do you think mom made a mistake pulling the trigger?» The question had bothered him for over a year, but Jongho hadn’t dared to ask before then. «She might have made it, been able to escape I mean. To come home. If she… if she hadn’t.» 

Soonbok heaved a long sigh. 

«I can’t say.» she bit the inside of her cheek. «I wish she hadn’t left us like that, but maybe she knew what they had in store for her would be worse...» 

Soonbok suddenly gripped Jongho’s hands, a fearful look overtaking her features.

«Jongho, I want you to promise me something,» He tilted his head, nervous about the fierceness in her eyes. «Never let them catch you, you hear me? No matter what you have to do or say. If you have to do as Hae, let it be a last resort. But don’t ever let them get you.»

«…okay.»

«No, promise me properly.» Soonbok fell down to her knees beside him on the floor, hands hard on his shoulders. «promise me, Jongho. Even if I’m long gone and you only have to do it for yourself. Even if you have to kill hundreds. You’ll never let anyone take your freedom. Never.» 

«I promise Eomma.»

              _______________________

When Jongho was eighteen he found the remains of his Eomma in the woods. This time around there were no dreams warning him beforehand. Eomma left for the market, like she’d done a million times before, and simply never came back. 

He went into the woods looking for her, and find her, he did. Her body laid sprawled out on the forest floor, blood splattered on the flowers around her. 

Everything froze.

How long Jongho stood there, staring at her, was impossible to say. It could have been seconds, it could have been days. Tears fell steadily down his cheeks, dripping down onto his chest as his body was locked in place. Unable to move, to think, to breathe. 

«Eomma?» He asked weakly, feeling like a child as he just stood there, waiting for her. 

Eomma didn’t answer. She was dead. Of course she was dead, look at the blood Jongho. But how could she be dead? She’d been alive yesterday, how could she be dead now? How could the world have remained on its course, uncaring that she had died? How could the world continue to exist, when Jongho’s whole world had just shattered?

She couldn’t be dead. He would have seen it, he would have known. It had to be someone else, his Eomma wouldn’t just leave him all alone like this. She would never have left him. It had to be someone else. 

Jongho took tentative steps towards the body. He didn’t want to know, he didn’t want to see. But he had to. What if it wasn’t Eomma, and she was out there and needed him? Jongho could fix this, he could save her.

There was an arrow sticking out of her back, like someone had hunted her down. Flies swarmed the body, their buzzing the only sound Jongho could hear. 

He turned the body carefully, and screamed. No no no not Eomma. Please please please not his Eomma. 

Jongho pressed her body into his chest, hugging her close as he rocked back and forth. She was cold, freezing to the touch, and stiff as a rock. He held her in his arms, draped over his lap, like she’d held him his whole life, hoping that somehow if he just held her close enough, she’d wake up.  

How could this happen, how could Eomma die like that? How could she leave him?

«Please Eomma,» Jongho sobbed, his warm tears falling down on her cold skin. «Please wake up.»

She didn’t. She couldn't. She was dead. She was dead. Jongho was alone. Eomma was dead.

She was dead. 

«She was your mom?» A voice asked. 

Jongho scattered away from the voice, back pressed up against a tree. He still had his Eomma clutched tightly in his arms, having scurried off with her still held fast.

It was a young man, a soldier, that had snuck up on Jongho. He looked to be in his early twenties, short black hair and a round face. He was watching Jongho with sad eyes, eying the corpse the siren held like it was a treasure. 

«I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you,» the soldier continued, arms raised placatingly. «I’m Kim Jihyun.»

Jihyun waited, as if he wanted to see if Jongho would answer him. Jongho didn’t, only stared at him with wide terrified eyes. What was a soldier doing here?

«She was your mom?» Jihyun asked again, eying Soonbok’s body. 

Jongho nodded stiltedly, fresh tears gathering in his eyes. 

«Oh I’m really sorry,» Jihyun said, looking genuinely heartbroken. He stepped towards Jongho carefully. «Do you know what happened?» 

Jongho shook his head, watching Jihyun approach like a hawk. He seemed to sense Jongho’s apprehension and stopped a little away from the siren. Jihyun sat down on the ground, legs crossed and posture lax. 

«What are you doing here?» Jongho asked, voice cracking. 

«Someone reported an injured woman running into the woods,» Jihyun said. «We’re investigating.»

«We?» Jongho asked.

«Yeah, me and my squad,» Jihyun scratched the back of his head, smiling sheepishly. «I kinda… got lost.»

«Well you found her,» Jongho gulped down another sob, he didn’t want this stranger to see more than he already had. «You can go home now.»

«Don’t you… don’t you want to know what happened?» Jihyun asked, a surprised look on his face. 

«She’s dead,» Jongho’s voice broke, tears flowing once more. Saying it out loud just made it seem so real. «What does it matter how?»

«We can bring justice to whoever did this to her,» Jihyun said, confused and gentle eyes piercing Jongho's. «C'mon, walk with me to town. We can figure something out.» 

«No,» Jongho shook his head, arms shaking with effort around his mother’s body as he adjusted her away from Jihyun. He didn’t want anyone else touching her. Didn’t want to let strangers near her. «Just go.»

«You don’t have to let her go. You can carry her.» Jihyun laid a gentle hand on Jongho’s shoulder. «She wouldn't want you to be alone right now.»

At the gentle touch Jongho started crying again. Jihyun was right, he didn’t want to be alone, but now he wouldn’t be anything else but alone. He wanted his Eomma, the last person that actually knew him. But she was dead, and Jihyun was the only one here. 

Jongho rose on unsteady feet, Soonbok held still in his arms. He didn’t want to jostle her. Jihyun patted awkwardly and gently along his back, shushing him like he was a child. It was oddly comforting. 

«It’s gonna be okay,» Jihyun said, giving one last squeeze to Jongho's shoulder. 

Jongho felt oddly torn, unsure what he was actually feeling. On one hand, he was so scared of going to town with Jihyun. He hadn’t been around humans without Eomma except the one time he’d eaten them. What would it be like to be anywhere knowing his Eomma couldn’t help him? That she wasn’t home, waiting for him? 

On the other hand, he really, really, didn’t want to be by himself. To be in their home, where it would be empty, where everything reminded him of her. Stranger Jihyun might be, but he’d been kind so far, and Jongho just wanted somebody. 

They walked a little, silent and peaceful. Jongho felt weirdly attached to the stranger ahead of him. But then the air shifted. All his life Jongho’s mom had told him how important instincts were. How for every species, not only sirens, instinct was their most important tool. It kept one alive, more than anything else.

Jongho didn’t know what changed, but something was wrong. He stopped walking, heartbeat picking up. Fear gripped him tight, and it was like a switch had been turned in his brain. Like his grief wasn’t clouding his ability to think anymore. 

Why exactly had a squad of soldiers been sent into the woods? Wouldn’t a pair have sufficed? Soldiers in these numbers weren't usually in their town. And hadn't Jihyun said he was lost? Then why was he the one leading them, with steady unhalting feet, straight back to town. His Eomma had run from someone, away from town. 

«Jihyun-ssi, where are your friends?» Jongho asked, taking one step away from the man. 

«What do you mean?» Jihyun asked, turning toward Jongho. «I told you, I got lost.» 

He was lying, Jongho could smell it. There were people lurking in the woods far ahead of them, trying to stay still, but Jongho could hear them now that the blood had stopped rushing in his ears. 

«Did you do it?» Jongho hissed. Canines fell into place as his eyes turned slitted, glowing purple. «Did you kill my Eomma?!» 

«Oh my God,» Jihyun said, mouth open wide. «It was true, you are a monster.» 

«Answer me!» Jongho growled, the teeth making speaking more and more difficult. 

«It wasn’t me,» Jihyun said, raising his arms. «Our commander, he caught up to her. He thought you might come, if it were true, if she actually had brought a demon into the world.» 

«How did you know about me?» Jongho asked, setting the body down gently. He would need his hands for this. « You killed her to get me?»

«We didn’t mean to…» 

«Don’t lie to me!» Jongho shouted. 

«Fine alright we thought the wench would willingly give us your location after some… persuasion!» Jihyun yelled back. «But the bitch wouldn’t budge so we let her think she’d escaped to follow her, but she was too goddamn fast! We had to kill her or we’d lose sight of her!» 

«How did you know?!» Jongho pressed, claws out as he stalked closer to Jihyun. 

«There was a report of people getting eaten in a harbor nearby, we did some digging and the townsfolk told us there was this lady living far out of town. That she was a queer, never seen with a man, but some of them had seen a young boy with her. Maybe her son…» Jihyun looked down at Jongho’s dead mother. «Look man, I told you everything. I was just doing my job. I swear. Please let me leave, I won’t bother you again.» 

Jongho did. In just the same manner as they’d let his Eomma go. 

When he was done with all of them his skin was more red than brown. His hands shook as he picked up his Eomma again, and staggered home. He might’ve just eaten, but he'd never felt more empty in his life. 

Choi Soonbok got buried in the sand, not far away from where she first met Hae. Flower crown after flower crown getting laid over her mound as  braided one after the other. Jongho sat by her grave the whole night, letting everything sink in as his hands kept working. 

Some things were indisputable facts. 

His Eomma died because of him. Because he had insisted on taking revenge for his mom. This was his fault. 

He deserved to be alone, forever. He was a monster, and he deserved his solitude. 

But, if he was a monster, humanity was the devil. 

Jongho hated humans, and he hated himself. 

               _______________________

Jongho was lost for a while after that. At first he had problems leaving Eomma’s grave, just sitting by the sea with her. He’d manage to take care of their livestock, but otherwise he’d just sit in the sand, sometimes braiding more flower crowns. 

It almost felt like his moms were there when he sat like that, the waves soothing to listen to. Some part of him worried that more soldiers were going to come near his home, but he’d just kill them as well. He wouldn’t allow them to disturb Eomma’s slumber. 

He wished he had been able to find some of his mom’s remains, wishing he could have buried them next to one another. Or that Mom’s remains at least had been claimed by the sea, where she belonged. Not with some filthy humans. 

The question of what he was meant to do now kept bugging him. He knew Eomma wouldn’t want him to sit there, wasting away slowly, but he couldn’t just leave her, leave them.

He could explore the world maybe, but what good would that do when he had no one to share his explorations with. No one that cared whether he lived or died.

What are you supposed to do, when you become an orphan? 

Supposedly he could try to find others like him. Other sirens, or maybe mermaids, even fox spirits. But what good would it do? They weren’t going to be what he wanted. Jongho wanted his mothers. 

Jongho longed for them. He longed for their touch, their voices, their smell. He wasn’t ready, how could they leave before he was ready? There was so much he wanted to know, wanted to ask. Who were they, before they became his moms? What had their childhood been like? What did they think of humans? Had they always wanted children?

So many things Jongho now would never get to ask them. Because they were gone and they’d left a crater behind, a void. A venomous monster in him that ate him up and stole his breath. 

He would never, ever, see them again. 

Jongho didn’t know what to do with that. 

He felt stuck. Like someone had nailed him fast. To his body, to the beach, to his life. Everything around him kept spinning, kept moving, kept living. The sun rose and sank, the waves beat into the shore, the birds kept flying. But Jongho couldn't. 

Jongho couldn’t move. He was frozen. 

He couldn't be in their house, haunting memories plaguing him, the beast inside feasting on his sorrow. He couldn’t leave. He had nowhere to go. He was stuck and it would never ever be better. His moms would never come back. 

He just wanted his moms. 

Jongho thought idly that he could just disappear. Who’d even notice? And if he died, maybe he could see his moms. He didn’t know if he believed in an afterlife but there was a chance right? There was a chance of seeing his moms, if he just disappeared. Laid down and vanished. 

However, he kept thinking what they’d say. If he died then, not even nineteen years old. How disappointed they’d be. They would never want him to die, even if they had to spend eternity without him. 

Promise me Jongho. 

He supposed not even himself was allowed to take his own freedom. Besides, he had a responsibility. As far as he knew, he was the only one alive that remembered them as they were. As they would want to be remembered. If he disappeared too, Hae and Soonbok would be truly gone from the world. 

So Jongho lived. Frozen still, locked in the sand. But he was alive. 

After two months of sitting on the beach, the weather started to turn colder. His birthday must have been approaching, his first one alone. There would be no more flower crowns he could make then, and if he didn’t move soon, he’d starve in the winter. 

The loneliness hit him again like a tidal wave, he’d have to do everything alone now. There would be no help, no one he could ask, about anything. There would be no other voices but his own, everything so so quiet. Except when he slept.

Everyday life suddenly switched up on him then. He had the realization that he could see his mothers. There was a way for him to do that. Not talk to them but he could see them. 

The sight. 

How could he not have thought about that before? If he ate enough, he could control it. He could dream of them, he could see them in the past, every night. 

There was no telling just how many people Jongho ended up eating. For over a year he ate someone at least once a week, then he’d do the bare minimum to stay alive so he could sleep. He slept and slept and slept, living in the past. 

He saw his moms grow up, the challenges they’d have to overcome. How his Eomma was thrown out by her father when she declared she’d never marry a man. How Mom’s siren parent was deceived by a human to come on land, only to get eaten. He saw how lonely his parents were before they found each other, how scared Hae was of becoming a mom. 

«The child would never be safe, Soonie,» she had said in one of the memories. «We could never make the world safe for it. Do you want that?» 

«I want a baby with you,» Soonbok had replied. «I want at least one more siren in the world, and Hae baby you’d be a great mom. We can do it together.» 

Jongho saw how Soonbok had been pained by how alone Jongho was, without even knowing it. 

«He doesn't have a single friend,» she said, head on Hae’s shoulder while Jongho of three played in the sand. «I know it’s too dangerous but I worry he’ll be alone and sad. What if he never has anyone but us Hae?» 

«He will,» Hae said, a far away look in her eyes. «He’ll have his own family someday. One with people that love him and will do anything to protect him.» 

The most interesting thing Jongho learned was where his mom had disappeared to when she was away. Both his moms had been part of an organisation to bring magic back to the world. Saving magical creatures and relocating them, pushing back against the people oppressing them. 

Jongho saw how many times his mom almost died to save others. He saw the pain the government brought with them. How it wasn’t just where they lived, but everywhere. The whole world had the same disease.

Power hungry people wanting magic for themself. To use and abuse as they saw fit. Not wanting to feel inferior, not wanting to share. Not wanting their stupid little ego hurt. How they’d even tear up their own kind to get out on top and stay there. 

Jongho hated them. He hated them all.

He woke up one day long after he’d turned twenty with fury in his heart. Those people didn’t deserve to live. Not with all that they’d done. 

Jongho knew revenge wasn't something that would make him feel better. When even the sight only dulled the pain for a little while, he believed nothing had that power. Nothing could bring back what he’d lost. 

But vengeance would give him a purpose. He could make the world just a little safer for others, making sure some of them didn’t have to feel what he felt. He could rid the world of the devils. make the world safer.

He might have still hated all humans, they had let one of their best perish without caring. But the ones on the bottom among them were suffering too. The rich were the ones who made all the decisions, that decided what the masses thought.  

Who is the real enemy?

Jongho knew, and he was going to kill them all. 

                ____________________

Turns out, the aristocrats were some slippery slimy old fuckers. Guarded and kept safe by wall after wall of soldiers willing to lay down their life for them. Blinded by loyalty or pay. 

Jongho couldn’t slay the entire military. He was only one siren after all. But he could join it. For two years he blended in, he lived as a normal human. He enlisted, marking himself as one of their best, but not the best. Wouldn’t want too much attention after all. 

For years Jongho bit down insults, he pretended, he became a boot licker. He looked down when his superior passed in mock respect, when it actually was fear they’d see his eyes flash purple. He cut his hair short, became more masculine, and hid his skin beneath layers of clothes. He became a shadow.

One Duke he killed by dropping poison in his wine, another he shot. Never traced back to him. Jongho was patient, he was meticulous, and he was ruthless. 

The king was going to die by Jongho’s hand, and until then, the siren would let nothing stop him. He’d kill everyone that stood in his way. 

Jongho was soon twentyfour when a rare opportunity fell in his lap. Another troop had fallen sick, leading to Jongho’s troop being picked at the last minute to go with their commander to the capital. They would help guard one of the king’s most trusted advisors, a clan head who was practically the land’s second leader. 

If Jongho could kill him, it would throw their society into chaos. He would be one step closer to the king. How perfect. 

They had traveled for two weeks, weather amicable as they made their way across the sea. Jongho had to fight the urge to take a dip, it had been a long time since he had allowed himself to turn to his ocean form. 

«Liutenant Choi!» someone called him. «The commander wants you!» 

Jongho sighed, taking one last look out on the vast horizon one last time. The weather was good that day as well, except the fog creeping in behind them. 

The commander was usually to be found below deck, pondering over his plans. Jongho wasn’t fond of being below deck, it felt too confining. Too few escape routes. 

The commander was a big man, bearded and stern. He always looked like you had done something wrong, even when you were certain that you hadn’t. Like he could see your wrongdoings. 

«Ah Lieutenant Choi come in,» he said, waving  in when he knocked. «What do you think of our travel so far?» 

«Pleasant enough Commander Lee, the weather has been favoring us,» Jongho replied, waiting for the pleasantries to be over and done with. 

«Excellent, excellent.» The commander looked unwavering at Jongho. «Are you excited to see the imperial town Lieutenant?»

«Of course, it’s a sight to behold I’m sure,» Jongho fought raising an eyebrow at the commander. What did he want? Surely he hadn’t called him down just to chat. 

«Please sit Lieutenant, we're just having a conversation.» The commander smiled, but it didn’t come off as warm. «Have you traveled a lot before?» 

Yes. 

«No commander.»

«You grew up with your mother, correct?» 

Both of them, yeah.

«Yes, that's right.» 

«And your father?»

Don’t have one. 

«Never knew him Commander. Lost at sea when I was a toddler.»

The commander continued to stare and Jongho was getting irritated. What was with the interrogation? 

«Have I done something wrong sir?» Jongho asked, trying to seem nervous, keen to please. 

«No, that’s just the thing.» The commander wasn’t smiling anymore. «You haven’t done a single thing wrong, in the entirety of your military career.» 

Jongho cocked his head, genuinely confused. 

«Everybody is bound to screw up at some point,» the commander explained. «It’s the seemingly perfect ones that are good at hiding their mistakes.»

The commander stood up, looming over both his desk and Jongho. 

«What are you hiding, Lieutenant?» 

«You think I’m hiding something because I don’t mess up?» Jongho laughed. «Isn’t that a bit paranoid Commander?» 

«In my experience, those who are too good to be true are just that,» the commander said. «You come from nowhere, we have almost nothing on your background. Like you spawned out of the earth. Yet you are the perfect soldier. You don’t socialize, you don’t make mistakes and you don’t get too emotional.» 

The commander whipped out his gun, pointing it right between Jongho’s eyes. 

«You are the perfect spy.» 

Humans could be so fucking stupid and paranoid. Who would Jongho spy for, a ruler just as deserving of death as their own? Please. 

Jongho tried to answer, to come up with something that would win the Commander’s trust. To do something that wouldn’t lead to him getting shot right then and there, bleeding out at the enemy’s feet. 

He opened his mouth, just as the drun of a cannon rocked the whole ship. The Commander stared at the ceiling, gaze sharp. Thundering footsteps sounded, and one of the soldiers barged in, out of breath and panicked. 

«Commander! We’ve been breached!» He yelled. «It’s the black pirates!» 

Oh fuck. 

The black pirates were notorious. Unknown identities, in and out like shadows. Many believed they were the ghosts of a pirate crew killed long ago, haunting the sea as they searched for the afterlife. They were a thorn in the navy’s side, and right now, Jongho’s saving grace. If he could get out of there. 

The black pirates didn’t tend to leave any survivors after all.

The sound of fighting was audible even below deck, shots ringing and swords clashing. For Jongho it sounded like he was in the fight itself, the smell of death so pungent he could almost taste it. 

Then again maybe he was just hungry. 

The commander swore and stomped out of the room, Jongho long forgotten. He took a deep breath, trying to think. If he could just get above on deck without being seen, he could jump the railing and swim off. It would be a major set back but at least he’d fucking live. 

Damn it he hated pirates. 

Jongho started to move, silently and fast. But he had barely made it to the stairs when he heard a gun being cocked, right behind him. 

You’ve got to be kidding me. 

They’d already made it down?!

He turned. The pirate had all black clothing on him, even gloves and a mask. His eyes were hidden beneath the brim of his hat, no features distinguishable. 

The pirate motioned for  to go up, and since that was where Jongho wanted to be as well, he made no protest. 

Above it was chaos. All the pirates were in the same getup, and they were wrecking the navy. Bodies laid slewn everywhere, and in the first few seconds  immediately knew they were down to their last numbers. Yet he couldn’t see one fallen body of a pirate. Odd. 

The pirate behind him hit the back of his head with his pistol, making him fall face first into someone else’s blood. Disgusting. The pirate tied his hands together while Jongho was distracted, taking the siren with him to be positioned where he wanted him. 

The pirates were lining the survivors up in a row, kneeling at their feet. One man from Jongho’s squad was beside him, praying under his breath. Most of them were crying. 

They were all going to die.

Jongho saw their commander at one of the pirates’ feet, gun against his brow. 

It’s not fun is it? Jongho thought spitefully before a shot rang out, the commander dead at the pirates’ feet. 

«Your leader would rather choose death than freedom,» the pirate shouted. «And has therefore commanded all of you to follow his example.» 

A pirate went up behind them one by one, slashing their throats without a moment of hesitation. They fell like dominoes, the whole deck painted red at that point. The one beside Jongho screamed and pleaded, like all the others in line. 

Jongho wouldn’t give them that satisfaction. 

The cold steel of the blade kissed the skin of his neck as his head was wrenched backwards. Jongho pressed his eyes shut, refusing to let the last thing he saw be the face of the man murdering him. Instead the last thing he would see was the blue sky, infinite and vast, and his next destination depending on your belief system. 

«San wait.» 

The hands holding Jongho froze as the order rang out. He stayed perfectly still as footsteps approached him, boots against wet polished wood. The siren could tell they stopped right in front of him, probably inspecting him up close. 

«What’s your name?» the man who’d given the order asked. 

Jongho remained silent. 

«He asked you a question.» the one holding him, San, growled. He kicked the back of Jongho’s shin. «Answer.» 

Jongho opened his eyes and glared. The man before him was tall, exceptionally so, and lean. He had lowered the mask they all adorned, revealing surprisingly soft features, like his soft lips and round cheeks. He’d painted his eyes with kohl or something, smudging the dark paste around so the whites off his eyes were extremely visible and off-putting. 

«Your name,» the tall one demanded again, squinting down at Jongho. 

«It’s usually more polite to give your own name before demanding others’» Jongho spat. «Or has your depravity made you forget basic decency already?» 

San shifted the blade at Jongho’s throat, the threat clear and effective as a trickle of blood escaped Jongho’s skin. The tall one was staring at Jongho’s exposed neck, a sliver of something Jongho couldn’t determine in his eyes. 

«I’m Jeong Yunho,» He said, stepping closer to Jongho. It somehow made him seem even taller. «Your turn, little one.»

Now that was just rude. Everyone was little compared to that man. Jongho pressed his tongue against his cheek in annoyance, letting the silence stretch just a little before he answered. 

«It’s Jongho, Choi Jongho,» Though he refused to hope for salvation, giving out his name couldn’t hurt. At least they’d have a name to his face when he haunted their dreams after they murdered him. 

Yunho looked at San, a smile almost playing at his lips. San huffed out a breath but didn’t comment on it, the hand holding the blade steady as iron. 

«What are the markings on your neck there Jongho?» Yunho asked, leaning down so Jongho could feel his breath on his face. «Those almost look like… scars.» 

Jongho could feel his heartbeat picking up the pace again. To even notice the markings was one thing, usually people didn’t pay that much attention to Jongho or his neck. But if these pirates knew, if Yunho knew the significance of the markings, he would have been better off dead. 

«Hyung,» San mumbled, wrenching Jongho’s head further back so he too could see them. «You don't think…»

San also had black smudged around his eyes, which were slanted and feline looking. The rest of his features were hidden behind the mask, but Jongho could see blonde hair peek out from under the hat. 

«You’re a siren,» San gasped, a smile evident even underneath the mask. «Hyung we found one!» 

«A what?» Jongho laughed, maybe a bit too maniacal as the two exchanged excited looks. «A mermaid?» 

«Not a mermaid. A siren.» Yunho said, a long finger suddenly moving over Jongho’s marks. Jongho tried to flinch away but San’s grip was too strong. «Where have you been hiding all this time little one?» 

«You’re crazy,» Jongho continued laughing. His heartbeat was steadily increasing. «There are no such things as sirens or mermaids or whatever you want to call it!»

«Oh yes there are,» Yunho mumbled, looking at Jongho like he wanted to eat him. «And you’re one. One that has fallen right in our lap.» 

San removed the blade from Jongho’s throat,  letting go of his hair just as Yunho grabbed his collar. The pirate wasted no time ripping Jongho’s shirt to shreds, revealing more of the marks the siren had tried desperately to hide. A large hand trailed over the scars the gills left behind on Jongho’s ribs, so gentle it almost felt like a breeze. 

That was more than enough thank you. 

Jongho headbutted Yunho hard, sending the pirate’s long body sprawling out on deck. He rolled away as San threw himself after him, kicking the other’s legs out from under him. San rolled with his fall, getting back on his feet swiftly and gracefully, almost cat-like. But Jongho had also gotten to his feet, and was already heading for the railing. 

«Stop him!» San yelled, sprinting after Jongho. 

Pounding footsteps sounded behind Jongho, and he could hear shouting and swords being drawn. There was a long time since he had fed, so his water form would be the safest option, less chances of getting shot as well. 

Jongho flung himself over the railing, bones snapping and rearranging underneath his skin which was cracking up and hardening. It had truly been a while, the pain familiar and oddly comforting. 

Before he even hit the water his legs had molted into a long, powerful, black and red tail. His skin had turned scaly and darker, his gills opening along the sides of his ribs. His ears melted into holes, taloned fins rising along his spine and arms, cutting through the ropes. 

The first breath of saltwater stung, it always did. His mom had said it was because he’d spent too little time in his fish form, but he thought it was because the transition was never complete until he breathed. Like everything else about transformation, it was just simply unpleasant. 

Jongho pointed his face down into the dark of the sea and kicked his tail. He wouldn’t have to swim far before the pirates could no longer see him, and then he could just wait and see where they went. Whichever way they took their ship would be the opposite direction of where he would swim. He’d escape, start anew, and continue with his plan. Maybe change his name for good measure. 

Just when he started to slow down his descent he heard something. Or rather, felt something. His hearing underwater wasn’t the best, but his talons picked up every vibration in a 2 mile radius. Something was moving towards him, something fast and… similar to him. 

He spun around just in time to see a mermaid swimming towards him. It was pink and white, probably from southern waters, and bigger than him. It had long black hair, maybe to its waist and had… rope clutched in its hands. 

You got to be fucking kidding me. Jongho thought angrily. The black pirates had a mermaid amongst them? No wonder they knew what to look for, mermaids were the beings with the most knowledge about sirens other than sirens themselves after all. Of fucking course the first time Jongho got to meet one it would here. 

Jongho growled at the mermaid, letting it know that it was seen and considering an enemy. The mermaid didn’t slow down, only made a clicking sound which could almost pass as swearing. Oh so it was frustrated? Imagine how Jongho felt after working for years to get on that ship only for it to be plundered by fucking pirates.  

The mermaid stopped just short of where Jongho had halted. Mermaids were as a rule faster than sirens, living most of their lives in the sea after all, usually bigger in size as well. No way Jongho could outswim it, especially in his weak state. Fighting it would be. 

The mermaid pointed at the surface, a pleading look in its eyes. It was pretty, round eyes and full lips, a long nose. Someone Jongho would have loved to meet in any other circumstance. He’d wanted to meet someone else like him after all. Nevertheless, Jongho wouldn’t go with it willingly. Not when it was working for the pirates. 

Jongho shook his head, baring his teeth. A sad look passed over the mermaid’s face, before it fell away. In a flash it swam right into Jongho, smashing a hand over one set of Jongho’s gills. Jongho felt his breath leave him making black spots dance in his head, but he still managed to sink his claws into the flesh of the mermaid’s biceps, tearing at it. The mermaid made a sound of pain but wasted no time biting at Jongho’s neck, blood darkening the water around them. 

They thrashed around, claws, teeth and sharp  fins clashing. Jongho could feel sharks approach them, but didn’t have time to dwell on it. He’d worry about being eaten by sharks if he got away from this godsdamned place.

The mermaid kept hitting his gills, making him more and more dizzy. If it kept it up he’d lose consciousness. He tried to retaliate, but the mermaid was too fast, too strong, blocking most of his hits. 

Jongho growled in both anger and frustration. He didn’t want to kill the mermaid. He didn’t want to be captured by these filthy pirates. He didn’t want to be here at all, he wanted to get away. He wanted his moms. 

Once again Jongho was left in a situation where he could only lose. 

He lunged forward, teeth bared and mouth agape as he bit into the mermaid’s chest, flesh tearing under his fangs. The bloodlust almost made him lose it, but he wouldn’t take a bite out of the mermaid. No way in hell. He wouldn’t eat it. 

The mermaid was crying out in pain again, but it didn’t try to dislodge Jongho. Instead, fast and without Jongho understanding what was happening, it coiled the rope around both of them. From tail to torso it swirled around them both, tying them together. Jongho opened his mouth, going for the mermaid’s jugular in a desperate attempt to distract it. 

Too late. It blocked him with its hand, with the other it yanked on the rope three times in rapid succession. Immediately the rope tightened around them as the pirates began dragging them up towards the surface again. 

Jongho thrashed aimlessly, crying out in frustration and panic. He bit and clawed at the mermaid, tried to sewer the rope, to wiggle loose, to do anything. But before he knew it they crashed through the surface, bodies smashing against the side of the ship. 

Arms hauled both of them onto the deck, where Jongho tried and failed to flop them back into the water. He heard muffled voices, shouting, and felt arms pry him away from the mermaid. His tail smashed into someone as soon as he was free of the ropes, though he couldn’t see if it did any lasting damage. He hoped it did, and that it hurt. 

Jongho was trying so hard not to panic.

He couldn’t see, couldn’t hear, couldn't breathe. His ocean form was not meant for land. Jongho would need to turn back to his human form soon or he would suffocate. Maybe that would show them; the siren they so desperately wanted chokes to death the second he’s in their grasp. 

Someone was grabbing at his shoulders, shaking him. More muffled shouting, vibrations off people running back and forth. All he could see were black figures, these uniforms were really effective in hiding their identity.  

It didn't matter. He’d kill them all. He wouldn’t end up as his mom, he’d eat them all first. 

In the end Jongho didn’t even get to think about turning. His body stole the control from him, a survival mechanism after realizing why it couldn’t breathe. One moment he was flopping around like the fish he was and the next he was gasping in air and kicking his feet around. Naked and helpless like his mom had been.  

«He turned!» someone shouted. 

The return of sound was so sharp it ringed in Jongho’s head. He let out a sound of pain, grasping his head between his hands in an attempt to shut the noises out. The mermaid got him good, his body still throbbed with pain, stinging where it had bit and clawed him.  

«Cover him up!» A soft voice called out. 

How considerate of his abductors to think of his comfort. He would rather not be there at all but at least they wouldn’t leave him butt ass naked on their deck to be stared at. Maybe they thought they could keep him as some sort of pet. 

Something, probably a blanket, was thrown over him. It was soft, and huge, and covered him from head to toe, muffling their incessant shouting and dulling the harsh sun. He stayed still, heaving for breath with lungs that were probably bruised from the feel of it. Maybe a couple of cracked ribs as well. 

«Seonghwa, maybe you shouldn’t…» someone said, far too close to Jongho for his comfort. 

The blanket was lifted slightly, just enough for someone to peek at Jongho’s face. It was the mermaid. It was just as pretty in its human form, wet hair sticking to tan skin, long eyelashes adorned with droplets that glinted like pearls.  

«Hey,» The mermaid said softly, he was the one that had told them to cover Jongho up. «I’m sorry…» 

«Seonghwa get back from him,» someone barked. «He may lash out again.»

Seonghwa, that was the mermaid’s name. Seonghwa gave whoever gave the order an angry look, scooting a tiny bit closer to Jongho. They were also wrapped in a blanket, lithe shoulders all that was visible.  

«I’m Park Seonghwa,» they said. «I’m really sorry about all of this. We just really need your help.»    

«Seonghwa, stand back!» the same one ordered. 

«He’s scared, Hongjoong,» Seonghwa snapped. «maybe if we just explained…»

«He’ll run away the first chance he gets!» someone else interfered. «We can’t afford that and you know it.»

Okay, so when Jongho escaped he wouldn’t kill Seonghwa. Seonghwa at least had some decency. The rest were fair game.

Jongho ducked his head up from the blanket, refusing to let them talk about him like he wasn’t there any longer. At least five guns were pointed at him, everyone had their swords out with the clear exception of Seonghwa. 

Yunho was recognizable still, even with the bloody nose, as well as San. Four others were standing closely around Jongho and Seonghwa, while the other pirates kept their distance. The smallest pirate was the one who stood the closest. He had a long red mullet, with long bangs covering his painted eyes. He had more piercings than Jongho was able to count and a red band tied around his upper arm. The only one with a splash of color added to their uniform. He had to be the captain. 

«Why haven’t you healed yourself?» The captain asked him, looking at Jongho’s bleeding neck. «Seonghwa has already recovered from your little tussle.» 

«Because I’m not a fucking mermaid you dimwit,» Jongho snarled. «Isn’t that the bloody point?» 

Someone laughed, and from the corner of his eye Jongho could see it was a pirate almost as small as their captain.  

«So sirens can’t heal the same way as mermaids?» the Captain asked, a dangerous glint in his eyes. «Excellent. That makes this easier.» 

He stepped a little closer to Jongho, smiling when Jongho hissed. There was something off about the pirate, he smelled wrong. Almost like rot. 

«Tell me, little siren, will you make this difficult?» The captain had cocked his head. «Or will you swear not to try to escape again? Do you swear you’ll assist us in freeing the world?» 

Jongho squinted at the man. What kind of maniac was he? Did the man actually think Jongho would keep his word even if he did swear to him? 

«I was raised by witches, you see,» the captain continued. «If you swear, I’ll hold you to it. Break your promise, and you’ll end up right next to me again.» 

«And if I refuse?» Jongho asked, eying the gun in the captain’s hand. They weren’t going to kill him, that much was obvious. However Jongho refused to be enslaved to any of their delusions. 

Promise me. 

The captain went still, features cold and hard as though they were carved out of marble. Jongho could tell that this was someone used to getting his way. Too bad. 

«Then I will shoot you in the leg and chain you up below deck until you do.» 

Seonghwa gasped and grabbed Jongho’s shoulder. Touch firm but not hard. 

«Hongjoong you can’t…» the mermaid began, almost moving like they wanted to hide Jongho behind him. How sweet. 

«It’s his choice.» Hongjoong shrugged. «I won’t do it if he swears he won’t escape until our mission is done.» 

Jongho could see some of the pirates shifting uncomfortably. Some even looked away. There was discord regarding their leader’s decision. Good. Jongho could work with that. He could sow the discord big enough for him to slip through the cracks. 

«Screw your mission,» Jongho spat, already steeling himself for pain. He wouldn’t promise the little pirate shit. «And screw you.»

Hongjoong looked at him for a long time. Jongho could see anger, sadness and admiration flit over the captain's features. Like he could see where  was coming from, but couldn’t afford to sympathize. 

Then he pointed the gun down at where Jongho’s legs were laying beneath the blanket, ignored the protests coming from Seonghwa, and fired the shot. 

Chapter Text

The siren passed out a few seconds after the bullet pierced his leg, falling limply into Seonghwa’s waiting arms. Hongjoong couldn’t blame the siren for passing out, the pain had to be excruciating. Hongjoong had never been shot before but he had felt the kiss of a blade more times than he would like to count. 

The mermaid patted the siren’s head gently, comforting the siren even though he couldn’t feel it. The siren looked so young, wrapped up in the blanket like that, held close to Seonghwa’s chest. 

«This is too far,» Seonghwa stated, the look he gave Hongjoong was cold as ice. «How did you imagine this would help?» 

«Seonghwa…» Hongjoong began but Seonghwa cut him off. 

«No. I don’t want to hear it.» Seonghwa rose to his feet, gathering the siren in his arms as though he was carrying a child. «Not everything needs to be so rushed, Captain.» 

They all watched as their mermaid stomped below deck, the siren clutched protectively in his arms. Hongjoong wouldn’t be surprised if Seonghwa defied his orders and healed the siren of all his injuries, including the gunshot. Though he would think Seonghwa would know Hongjoong was capable of doing it again if need be.  

«The side of your bed is gonna be cold today Cap,» Wooyoung chuckled, removing his mask with a long whistle. 

Hongjoong gave the younger one a glare, which Wooyoung ignored as per usual. He knew many of them hadn’t agreed to shooting the siren, but they would wait until Seonghwa stopped being angry to say something, wanting to keep conflict to a minimum. Keeping the peace and all that. 

Hongjoong might have been inclined to agree that he was being hasty, but he’d seen the siren boy’s face before. It was hauntingly familiar, appearing often in a couple of Hongjoong’s other lives. The siren would either bring them salvation or doom, and until Hongjoong knew which it was he wasn’t going to play fast and loose with his loves’ lives. No way.  

Besides, the siren had already proven to be dangerous and unpredictable. Without enough knowledge about his species Hongjoong would prefer the siren to be weakened and locked up below deck until a deal was struck. If that made his loves angry then so be it. He’d bear the burden of their anger. 

Hongjoong sighed and removed his hat and mask, ruffling his hair as he looked over at Yunho. 

«You okay?» He asked his quartermaster. 

«Oh, yeah.» Yunho smiled sheepishly, tapping his bloody nose. «It’s not broken or anything, he just banged it up good.» 

Hongjoong stepped toward him, reaching his hands up to inspect the injury closer. Yunho leaned down as their captain approached, a soft smile on his lips at their leader's protectiveness. 

It had scared Hongjoong, when Yunho had laid on the enemy’s deck with blood all over his face. The Hallows were usually a shield between them and the ships they plundered, meaning they didn't even get a scratch most of the time. Injuries thankfully kept to a minimum.

If Hongjoong got to decide none of them would step foot on the other ships, safer aboard the Outlaw. Too bad for him that they were impossible to control. They all refused to stand back and let the Hallows get to have all the fun, as they said. Hongjoong had learned long ago that he couldn’t argue with all of them at once, so he had made his peace with their involvement. 

Most of the time. 

«How did you even find the siren boy?» Hongjoong asked Yunho after he had inspected him enough to know he was truly okay. «When I turned around you were down and Sannie was almost over the railing trying to catch him.» 

«I saw the marks right before San slashed his throat,» Yunho said, laying a large hand over Hongjoong’s tiny one on his face. Then he smiled ruefully, ducking his head as if embarassed. «Got a little too excited, didn’t realize he would lash out before he did.» 

«Can’t blame you for that,» Hongjoong mused before he felt his face break out into a large grin. «We have one Yunho-yah.» 

«We do, finally,» Yunho said happily before he pecked Hongjoong on the forehead, practically bouncing on his feet with joy. He looked like he wanted to say more, but he looked off behind Hongjoong, eyes turning fond and gentle. «It’s okay Mingi baby, it looks worse than it is.» 

Mingi’s large frame came up behind Hongjoong, looking like a kicked puppy. He was like Hongjoong about injuries; extremely worried and anxious. Still not used to their injuries being prioritized, even after all this time. Even with Seonghwa with them. 

Hongjoong reached out and grabbed the little giant’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. He left the two towers alone, looking over his shoulder to see Yunho playing with Mingi’s platinum hair while Mingi fretted around him. 

«Sink the ship,» Hongjoong ordered the Hallows, the navy ship forgotten until then. Then the captain turned to San. «Did you learn anything about the siren?» 

«What, Yunho didn’t tell you?» San asked, already stripped down to his bottom layers and clinging to Yeosang like his life depended on it. The latter pretending he didn’t like the attention. 

«No, we got interrupted,» Hongjoong looked behind him at the giants now interlocked in a kiss so deep and intertwined he didn’t know who was who. «Mingi was worried.»

«Uhuh I can see that,» San smiled before he pursed his lips as he thought, holding a wiggling Yeosang back from escaping his clutches. «Well he didn’t really say much, mostly glared. He said his name was Choi Jongho though. Dunno if that is his actual name or not.»  

«Would he lie?» Hongjoong asked, this would be so much easier if they had the siren’s true name. Then Hongjoong could bind him to the ship without a promise ever being made. Not great for cooperation but good for eventual escape attempts. 

«Dunno. He’s probably good at lying with being a siren in the army and all. But it wasn’t a situation I think he expected to escape from. He’d have no reason to lie when he thought he was going to die.» San bit down on Yeosang’s shoulder, if it was to play or keep him still was difficult to say. 

Yeosang yelped and looked at Hongjoong with pleading eyes, his long black curls long since escaped his ponytail. 

«Sangie, we all know that if you didn’t like it you’d simply push him off,» Hongjoong laughed as the two started mock fighting. «Good job on the fog by the way.»

Yeosang perked up. Hongjoong had permitted him to try out more demanding spells lately, as long as the younger promised to be careful. Usually the pirates used fog to sneak up on their targets, making it easier to take the enemy by surprise. Today had been Yeosang’s first time trying it, and as was to be expected, he was a natural. 

«You think?» Yeosang gave up and let San bite him up his shoulder and jugular. «I thought it was a bit too thin in places.»

«Not at all,» Hongjoong reached out and ruffled Yeosang’s hair fondly. «Keep this up and you can even take over for me with the Hallows.» 

Yeosang preened under the praise, looking like he wanted to say something. But just then Wooyoung returned on deck and tossed himself over Yeosang and San, probably distressed that they were playing without him. 

Hongjoong left the screeching trio alone, not wanting to get dragged into it. He had an angry mermaid to deal with after all. 

The sound of cannons followed Hongjoong below as the Hallows heeded his command. The siren, Jongho, was the only survivor of the navy ship after all, so Hongjoong felt confident he didn’t need to supervise. 

Seonghwa's singing could be heard even through the noises outside the Outlaw, gentle and soothing. As Hongjoong descended through their decks the song picked up in volume as the captain got closer to the source. 

While they were not someone who usually kept prisoners, they had two furnished cells in their stores. Though unlikely, should the siren break through the metal bars he’d still have a hard time leaving the ship. Any escapees would have to crawl up past where Hongjoong stashed the Hallows for the night at the gun deck, then the main bedroom his loves used when they wanted to be together. 

Leaving unnoticed would be almost impossible. 

When Hongjoong entered the stores Seonghwa had his back to him, inside the cell with the siren who was still knocked out. Seonghwa had dressed in a couple of big pants that looked to be Mingi’s, a loose shirt tossed on top. Clearly the mermaid hadn’t fussed with his clothes, just dressed in a hurry with the items closest to him. 

The mermaid’s hair had curled slightly from the water, sticking to Seonghwa’s back and shirt. Jongho was laid on the bed in the cell, wrapped tightly in the blanket while Seonghwa patted his head gently, singing the siren’s body back together. Even after all the years together Hongjoong would never get enough of Seonghwa’s voice. 

«What is it?» Seonghwa sighed, not turning around to look at Hongjoong. 

«Thought I’d give you a chance to yell at me without the kids hearing it,» Hongjoong said. 

Seonghwa hummed unhappily. 

«Where was this consideration for the siren?» Seonghwa asked, taking out a roll of bandages from his pocket. 

«Seonghwa I know we don’t always agree on my methods…»

«I wouldn’t have jumped after him if I knew you were going to shoot him!» Seonghwa cut him off, glaring at Hongjoong over his shoulder. «We have no idea what he’s been through Hongjoong, and his first meeting with us has only been blood and violence. The people on the navy ship might have been near and dear to him and we killed them all!» 

Seonghwa sighed angrily and lifted the blanket off the siren’s foot. 

«You can be so incredibly short sighted it’s infuriating Hongjoong.» 

Hongjoong exhaled slowly, letting the mermaid’s words wash over him. He knew Seonghwa was right, it would be that much harder to strike a deal with someone who hated your guts, but Hongjoong couldn’t afford to play nice. 

«How did you even think he’d want to help us now?» Seonghwa continued. «We are strangers who have hurt him and scared him and you didn’t even try to explain.» 

«He hurt Yunho, and you,» Hongjoong deflected. 

«Oh please Hongjoong Yunho-ah and I are both perfectly fine,» Seonghwa rolled his eyes as he bandaged up the gunshot wound, which looked more like it was a week old rather than a couple of minutes. «I have been patching you guys up for almost a decade and we’re all fine… physically at least.» 

Seonghwa tightened the tied bandage before he wrapped the blanket back around the siren’s legs. The siren was still out cold, but now he was wrapped in a blanket burrito so tightly Hongjoong could almost fool himself into thinking he was asleep. 

«He might have done more,» Hongjoong said. «He might still be dangerous Hwa…» 

«Everyone is dangerous!» Seonghwa turned, hands on his hips and cold rage on his face. «We have been through this so many times, Hongjoong. You can’t protect us against the whole world.»

«I can try!» Hongjoong barked. «I need you, all of you, to be safe. I can’t live with the thought that something might happen to you and it will be my fault for not protecting you.» 

«You can’t control everything Hongjoong,» Seonghwa sighed, walking out of the cell and closing the door behind him. «If he should ever wish to help us now it will take time and patience. If he does help us at all.» 

Seonghwa stepped forward and laid his hands on Hongjoong’s shoulders, bending down to lay his forehead against the Captain’s. It was a habit the mermaid had, like he was trying to tell Hongjoong he still loved him and just needed Hongjoong to hear him. 

«You’re being very impulsive Hongjoong,» Seonghwa whispered, breath ghosting over Hongjoong’s face. «You act like this when you’re scared. Please, just tell me what it is that’s bothering you so.»

Hongjoong exhaled wistfully, grabbing Seonghwa’s hips to bring him closer. The mermaid smelled of salt and sea and something that was distinctly Seonghwa. Hongjoong could hold him close forever and it would never be enough. 

«I’m just afraid something might happen when we’re this close to the Sopro,» Hongjoong breathed into the space between them, eyes falling shut with the partial lie. «I just want you safe.» 

«We have time my love,» Seonghwa hugged Hongjoong close. Kissed his temple with more force than necessary. «Stop fretting so, and stop being so impulsive. We’re a team, we’ll make it together.»

But that was just the thing. They didn’t have time. If Hongjoong didn’t find the Sopro soon, the goddesses only knew what would happen to his loves when he could no longer keep them safe. When he would have to leave them without any certainty that they would be okay, be safe, be happy. That they wouldn’t be left in the clutches of those seeking harm upon them. 

When Hongjoong turned twentyseven, he’d die, no way out, no way to undo. Courtesy of being in a world you weren’t meant to be in. His coven had basically conjured him into existence and as a being not meant to exist he would fade away. He had known that his while life. But the crew didn’t, he hadn’t told any of them. He couldn’t. 

He couldn't tell them.   

             ____________

Jongho woke up angry. At first he didn’t remember why he was angry but as he blinked up against an unfamiliar roof with unfamiliar scents the memories washed over him. The commandor, the slaughter, the mermaid, the fucking pirates. 

That fucking little shit, he’d actually shot him. Jongho had been confident he would but was somehow still surprised that it hadn't been a bluff. Maybe it had been a farfetched hope about not having a bullet lodged in his leg. 

Jongho sat up carefully, taking in his surroundings. They’d put him in a rather well off cell, the bed he laid on comfortable and large, the mattress soft and sturdy. The cell was located on the storedeck or seemed, large barrels and wooden boxes stacked outside his cell door. Curiously enough, there were no instruments of torture in sight. But then again perhaps they would prefer to bring it along themselves, taking him by surprise. 

He was still naked underneath the blanket, which looked to be the same one they had wrapped him in on deck. It was somewhat comforting to know they hadn’t done anything to him while he was knocked out, not even dressed him. However, that might also be to keep him as vulnerable as possible. 

Jongho removed the blanket from his feet carefully, finding his right shin tightly wrapped in a clean bandage. It didn’t hurt as much as he would have thought… actually, his whole body felt better than it had for a while. 

There was no stiffness in his joints or muscles, no pain when he drew breath. It felt like he’d been on vacation for a month and just relaxed, not fighting below the sealine with a mermaid. 

Ah, the mermaid.   

Astounding, so they did really have healing abilities, and not just for themselves. Every ache and wound was erased from his body, like it had never been there. Well, with the exception of the gunshot wound, but he suspected it was healed somewhat with how little it hurt. Could mermaids control how far along to heal something then? Fascinating. 

«Hello,» Someone suddenly said. 

Jongho jumped, head whipping around to see who it was. Who had managed to sneak up on him. A rarity. Jongho usually heard or smelled when people approached him, his senses attuned to everything around him. He didn’t think someone had actually managed to sneak up on him before. 

It was an unknown pirate, porcelain skin with long dark curls to his shoulders and a big muscled body. He was pretty, features delicate as if carved out of stone, with a birthmark by his eye as a sprinkle on top. 

Why were these pirates so attractive? The other pirates Jongho had met hadn’t been anything like these.

«I’m sorry I startled you,» the pirate said, fumbling with the sleeve of his shirt. «I’m Yeosang, I was told your name was Jongho?» 

Jongho gave a curt nod, thrown off balance by the politeness. Seonghwa had been polite as well, but the pirate before Jongho was human. He shouldn’t be talking to Jongho like he was a friend, like he viewed him as a being on the same level as him. Was it a trick to foster a rapport? 

«Would you like me to fetch some clothes for you?» Yeosang asked. «We only have our own onboard, but we can look for clothes for you the next time we are in a town.» 

Was it another trick? Make Jongho tell them what he wanted then do the opposite? Did they want Jongho to feel grateful if they got him clothes, so he’d help them? Did they want him to like them, like they were friends? Did they expect something in return for the clothes?

«It’s not a trick question,» Yeosang had a tiny smile in the corner of his mouth. «If you want me to get clothes for you I will, if you prefer to be nude, I’ll simply avert my gaze from you when we speak.» 

Jongho knew he had been squinting at Yeosang ever since the pirate had introduced himself, but now he also tilted his head. Yeosang still had no particular smell, it was off-putting and really disconcerting. It made the pirate so much harder to read.  

«I would prefer to be clothed,» Jongho eventually answered when it became clear Yeosang wouldn’t leave until he replied. 

The pirate gave a brief nod before he turned on his heel and walked up the stairs, still without making a sound. How peculiar these pirates were, almost nonhuman. 

Come to think of it, they even had a witch as a captain, or was he simply raised by witches? Something was off with the captain that was for sure. He had smelled wrong after all, he couldn’t be human. Were any of them human then? Surely, the captain could just be a sympathizer to the regime. 

Yeosang stepped back into the storage deck, starting Jongho once more. He had a pile of clothes in hand, looking like a larger amount than one outfit. 

«I grabbed a couple, all clean so you could have something to pick from,» Yeosang informed him, sliding the clothes through a chute in the celldoor. «The captain asked us to tell him when you were awake, would you like me to wait a couple of minutes before I fetch him?» 

Jongho looked from the pile of clothes to Yeosang then back at the clothes like they were poisonous. The thought of wearing the pirates’ clothes was unsettling, he’d still smell them on them no matter how clean they were. But roaming around naked was much worse. 

As for his meeting with the little captain…He couldn’t really say if he preferred to meet with the pirate captain right away or later, though he supposed in the grand scheme of things it didn’t matter. Though he hoped he wasn’t going to be dressed in something ridiculous while the captain demanded gods only knew what from him. 

Yeosang politely turned around when Jongho approached the pile of clothes, the blanket held up like a shield. Surprisingly, the gunshot wound didn’t hurt that badly to stand on, more a dull ache with the occasional flare of pain. That would be handy whenever he managed to get out of there. 

Jongho picked out a pair of dark pants that looked big enough for him, and a long-sleeved blue sweater that was too big for him. The neck of the sweater was wide on his shoulders, revealing more of his neck and clavicle than he had in years. Though, since the pirates already knew he was a siren he supposed the need to cover every inch of his skin was gone. 

«You can just get the captain now,» Jongho sighed when he was fully dressed. The new clothes felt weird on him, so used to his uniform. But it felt good as well to be in something less formal.  

«Alright, we’ll be down shortly,» Yeosang gave him a onceover, eyes lingering at Jongho’s exposed clavicles. «You look good in blue.»

What the hell was that supposed to mean? Jongho furrowed his brow but the pirate only smiled before he walked away again. 

Jongho shook his head before he folded the blanket and put it on the bed, the rest of the clothing soon following. The act of making things neater soothed him somewhat, probably a force of habit after years in the military. Though he couldn’t help but feel nervous.  

No matter what the little captain wanted he wouldn’t give it to him. No way, he would never be in service of a pirate, witchy or not. But what would they do when he refused? Torture? They couldn’t make him, but what if they simply killed him if he refused? He didn’t want to die, and he had promised Eomma he would live, but he wouldn’t enslave himself to them either. 

Caution was probably the best option. They seemed intent on coming of as nice people so Jongho would let them. Their facade would break when Jongho refused to be fooled, but then he would know what truly laid in store for him. 

Jongho heard the captain’s footsteps on the stairs, and smelled the weird earthy smell that followed him. At least this confirmed there was nothing wrong with Jongho’s senses, Yeosang was just special. 

The captain was clad in more casual attire now, the uniform they’d adorned stripped off. How much time had passed since Jongho passed out? A day? More? It was difficult to tell. 

The captain had red and black slacks on, tall boots and a leather jacket. A myriad of necklaces laid over a red shirt in a way that somehow looked both intentional and messy, giving the tiny captain an unpredictable vibe. His red mullet was messy and free, bangs still hanging over smoky eyes. 

He looked good, Jongho had no qualms about admitting that inside his own head. Though he’d never show that appreciation so anyone could see it. Wouldn’t want them thinking they could use his functioning eyes as leverage. At the captain himself Jongho only stared, trying to look relaxed where he sat on the bed.  

«I think neither of us want this to drag on,» The captain began, sitting down on one of the barrels. Jongho only scoffed in answer. Somehow he doubted the captain cared much what Jongho wanted. «Have you ever heard of the Sopro?» 

Jongho didn’t have to fake perplexity on that question. 

«It’s a stone, a ruby, said to hold the power to unite people’s feelings.» The captain continued, watching Jongho’s face intently. «I want to use it to stop the oppression of magic.»

Jongho blinked at the little captain. 

«That sounds like bullshit,» Jongho scoffed. «There isn’t any such object in the world.»

«No?» Hongjoong cocked his head. «I thought sirens were supposed to be all-knowing.» 

«If I was all-knowing, do you really think I’d ever be captured by you?» Jongho rolled his eyes. Stupid pirate. 

The corner of the captain's mouth lifted in a tiny smirk. He was clearly amused. 

«No, I suppose not,» The captain said. «But you have the power of sight then?» 

Jongho remained silent. Giving the pirates more knowledge about him was the last thing he wanted to do. The less they knew the better, the chances of escape infinitely heightened as well. 

«Alright then, keep your secrets,» the captain shook his head. «The Sopro is real, and I intend to find it. The slaughter and harvesting of everything magical has gone far enough. If you help us find the Sopro we can finally put an end to it.» 

Jongho couldn’t smell a lie on the captain, but he’d met people before who could lie without detection. The pirate might believe what he was saying but that didn’t mean it was true. It didn’t mean one of the other pirates wouldn’t want the  supposed stone for something more nefarious. It certainly didn’t mean Jongho believed him or his cause. 

«So if I tell you where to find your stone, you’ll let me go?» Jongho asked. As if they would ever let a siren slip them by. 

«Almost.» The captain leveled Jongho with a stare so intense Jongho felt as if the captain looked right through him. «I don’t trust you to not just lie and send us on a wild goose chase, hence why I asked you to promise me you wouldn’t escape earlier today.» 

So it was the same day. Wild, it felt like at least two days. Crazy to think about how Jongho was seconds away from death at least three times only a couple of hours ago. This was a really long day. 

«If you remember I’m not going to swear you shit,» Jongho looked down at his bandaged leg demonstrately, before he looked back up. «I am not about to make a deal with you seeing as I don’t trust you. I don’t make a habit of cooperating with the enemy.» 

«How exactly are we enemies?» Hongjoong asked. «I want justice for all magical creatures, that includes you. Shouldn’t it be something you strive towards not from?»

«I don’t like pirates,» Jongho said. «Especially those who abduct me go figure.»

«Desperate times calls for desperate measures» The captain shrugged. «I do not trust you to stay put and you’re too dangerous to let loose, a deal is the best thing for both of us. Believe it or not we are on the same side.»

«We are not.» Jongho stated firmly. 

«No?» It was the captain’s turn to squint at Jongho. «So you would rather let the way things continue the way it’s going? You can’t expect me to believe you were on that ship safely in uniform because you support the regime.»

«And if I was?» Jongho quipped. 

Hongjoong let out a loud high-pitched laugh, throwing his head back as the coils of laughter wracked through his body. He had good teeth, Jongho noted. It seemed like these pirates had good hygiene at least. 

«You might be a good liar, little siren,» Hongjoong chuckled. «But you’re not that good. You have not raised a single objection to our treatment of your comrades, nor have you shown any grief for them.» 

Hongjoong stood up, walking closer to Jongho’s cell, but not near enough for Jongho to reach him. Smart little pirate. 

«You were not in the army because of loyalty,» Hongjoong continued. «Whatever your motives, you are not loyal to the regime. But apparently you’re not loyal to your own kind either when you refuse to help them.» 

«The problem little pirate is that I hate your kind,» Jongho hissed, some of his canines falling in. «You think me a liar, and I think you are a fucking snake. You will not let me go, and I will not help you. We are at an impasse.» 

Jongho stood up, steady on his feet despite the shot of pain coming from his leg. He would not let himself appear weak in front of this man. 

«What is your next move little Captain?» He asked, holding his hands on his hips in faux relaxation. «Torture? Execution?»

Hongjoong stayed still for a moment. Once more the pirate captain had that hard steely expression on his face. Jongho almost expected him to take out his gun and shoot him right then and there. 

Instead Hongjoong’s features smoothed out in a blank mask, not a single sign of any emotion on his face. 

«You’d like that wouldn’t you?» Hongjoong asked. «Then you’d win, and I would prove we’re your enemies.» 

The captain turned away from Jongho and started walking toward the stairs. At the foot he halted, turning his head slightly toward Jongho again. 

«We won’t harm you anymore unless it’s in self-defence,» The captain continued, ignoring Jongho’s look of disbelief. «I hope you’ll change your mind soon, lest you go stir crazy in there.» a mocking smile filled the pirate’s face. «Nonetheless, welcome aboard the Outlaw Jongho-ssi.»

Jongho grimaced, sitting back down on the bed as he was once more left alone. As if they wouldn’t torture him or hurt him if he was diffcult enough. When they realized Jongho wouldn’t fawn at their feet just because they had the capabilities for politeness they’d break and show their true side. 

Their captain was rotten, the rest of the crew had to be too. Pirates were all the same, just as humans. They couldn’t trick Jongho, he’d seen what their kind was capable of. He’d never fall for such easy tricks. 

The problem was how the hell he was going to get out of there. He’d rather escape before he had stretched their patience far enough for them to break. Escaping injured would be so much more difficult. 

Then there was the issue of feeding. Jongho had timed the next time he would need to feed to when they got to the imperial city, seeing as there would be people everywhere for him to pick and choose from. But if he was going to be confined to this little cell…

Jongho would not tell them about his need for human flesh. They could use any and all information against him and this particular fact was like a flaming achilles heel. He would not show them any of his weaknesses.

Though, if he didn’t feed when two weeks had passed he risked the bloodlust consuming him. He risked the pirates seeing him at his most monstrous. Not that it mattered if they thought him a monster… did it? 

It was the part of himself Jongho still had the most issue with, the part he thought most unseemily. It had never gotten easier, though he had stopped feeling remorseful. Humans didn’t deserve better anyways. 

However, it still just felt so incredibly unnatural. Though he supposed that was to be expected of what could classify as cannibalism. Or was it? Jongho couldn’t really say but it was icky at the very least.  

Nonetheless Jongho needed to get off the ship and far away from the pirates before two weeks had passed. He supposed he could eat one of them but that would include staying longer on the ship than he wanted and he needed to be able to leave swiftly. Preferably without any of them knowing. Damn pirates, he couldn't even swim away from them when they had Seonghwa. 

Jongho still felt trepidation about using his bird form. Mom had emphasized how important it was to keep it a secret, and she wasn’t one to excaggerate the danger of anything. Plus it was way easier for people to spot him and shoot him if he flew. He liked flying alright but it still didn’t feel as natural as swimming. If he was to fly away from the pirates he’d have to do it without them seeing him, making it trickier. 

Jongho was alone with his thoughts for maybe an hour or more before he heard steps on the stairs again. He sat up a little straighter, eying the foot of the stairs with a thumping heartbeat. 

It was the mermaid. They had black slacks on now, with tall boots with quite the heel. As they descended Jongho saw that they wore a tight black corset over a flowy white shirt one sleeve missing but on that hand the mermaid had put on a high black glove. Their hair was braided down their back, short pieces framing their face. Jongho realized they had long bangs that complimented their face perfectly which had been hidden when their hair was wet. 

They looked extraordinary. 

Jongho pinched his own thigh harshly. This was not the time to think about pretty mermaids, no matter how pretty they were. Honestly all the pirates he’d met so far were very pretty and it was really unfair. Maybe he’d just had a dry spell for too long… Yeah that was it. When he was out of there he just needed to find someone to hook up with so he could get his head right again. 

«Hello,» The mermaid smiled softly at Jongho, who just then realised they had brought him a tray of food. «I thought you might be hungry?»

Jongho was. The smell of whatever Seonghwa had brought down woke up his stomach which coiled like a beast. Jongho licked his lips subconsciously, the act eliciting a soft laugh from the mermaid. 

«I’ll take that as a yes,» They stepped towards Jongho’s cell, sliding the tray of food through the chute. 

It was bulgogi, still wafting off steam and it looked so good. How these pirates managed to get and keep these types of ingredients out at sea was beyond Jongho but right then he couldn’t give less of a shit. Navy food sucked. 

Jongho pushed down all caution about whether the food could be tampered with and promptly sat down, sliding the tray into his lap. He really hoped it was as delicious as it looked. 

Jongho took a bite and had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop any noise of appreciation from escaping his mouth. Whoever was the pirates’ cook was really, really good and they should protect them at all cost because they would be kidnapped in an instant with these types of skills. 

«Do you like it?» Seonghwa asked, who had sat down on the floor as well, watching Jongho intently. Almost endreaingly. 

Jongho halted his chewing, before he gave a tiny nod before he continued eating. The mermaid lit up at the motion, eyes almost sparkling. 

«I’m glad,» Seonghwa looked down at their hands, right hand dragging their glove off then on again, like they were nervous. «I wanted to apologize for being so… harsh when I brought you back on the ship. I didn’t know Captain would be so… stubborn.» 

Jongho swallowed, inspecting the mermaid. They did look truly apologetic, and he couldn’t smell any lies on him. Strange, were they at odds with the captain? Were they kept here against their will too? Must be. No mermaid would willingly join pirates. 

«It’s alright,» Jongho said, setting down his empty plate. Whoa he must have eaten fast. «You healed it, didn't you?» 

Seonghwa nodded, big boba eyes looking at Jongho once more. Jongho could tell they were fascinated by him. He could understand that, he too was intrigued by the mermaid. Their species was related after all, Jongho wanted to know what similarities they had. 

«Is it true you heal through song?» Jongho couldn’t help asking, shifting closer to the mermaid without thinking about it. 

Seonghwa nodded again, bangs swaying gently back and forth. 

«How does it work?» Jongho asked. 

The mermaid was quiet for a moment, clearly lost in thought. They pursed their lips together, looking up as they thought. Cute. 

«From what my mother told me we manipulate time through our song,» Seonghwa said. «We can turn the broken body back to where it was before the injury, but it’s better if we turn it forward, speeding up the healing. Turning the flesh back too far can be very hard on the body.» 

«Oh?» Jongho was fascinated. Mermaids could change time? How extraordinary. «What happens if you turn it back too far?»  

«Worst case, they die,» Seonghwa looked forlorn. «The body isn’t meant to be disconnected from their time. If I heal a single part by taking it back too far the body might reject it. Causing further injury or their death as the parts can’t coexist.» 

«So you turned my body forward when you healed me?» Jongho asked, one hand feeling across the once broken ribs. They didn’t feel different. 

«I did, or to put it in another way; I tricked the energy in your body into thinking weeks had passed so it healed rapidly,» Seonghwa motioned at Jongho’s hand on his ribs. «This is draining for both your body and me. I can push and put my own magic into injuries but it’s peoples’ own body doing most of the work. Therefore there are limits to what even mermaids can heal.» 

«Fascinating,» Jongho mumbled. No wonder his body felt so good, Seonghwa had pushed it into thinking Jongho had relaxed for weeks. 

«Thank you,» Seonghwa beamed at Jongho. «I thought sirens could heal too? But you said you couldn’t?» 

Jongho shook his head.

«It’s something only mermaids can do according to… uhm, my Mom,» Jongho suddenly felt sadness creep into his chest, making his once pleasantly full stomach feel heavy and too hard. 

How long had it been since he had talked to anyone about her? Had he ever talked to somebody about her, without lying or having to hide what she was? 

«Your mom?» Seonghwa asked, their tone suddenly very soft. «Is she… is she no longer with us?» 

Jongho gulped, suddenly feeling panic in his chest. Was he about to cry?! Come on Jongho it was nearly eight years ago he shouldn’t be tearing up as soon as someone mentions her passing. He shouldn’t be showing any vulnerability to anyone. 

«I’m so sorry,» Seonghwa said, and it sounded like they really meant it. «I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose your mom.» Jongho pressed his fingers so meanly into his own thigh he knew it was going to get bruised. «Is there anyone else, your other parent perhaps, who you’d like me to send a letter to? Let them know you’re okay?»

Jongho shook his head again, looking down at the empty plate of food. He couldn’t bear to see the emotion, the empathy on the mermaid’s face. It made him feel like he would burst. 

«No one?» Seonghwa pressed, sounding horrified. «What of your pod? Surely they…»

«Don’t have one,» Jongho interrupted. «I was… raised on land. With Eomma and Mom. There was never anyone else.» Jongho didn’t want to talk about this anymore. «Anyway. I have meant to ask, is there any gender you prefer to be called by?»

Jongho glanced up at Seonghwa again. The mermaid still looked so incredibly sad but a second later the mermaid schooled his features, thankfully taking the change of topic. 

«I prefer male pronouns,» Seonghwa suddenly looked shameful. «I have just assumed the same for you. I hope that is correct?» 

Jongho nodded. Seonghwa looked relieved, his features open and relaxed again. He was kind, at least it seemed so. Jongho liked how the mermaid could understand him, in ways no one really could after his Mom died. Could he be trusted though? 

Could he be Jongho’s way out of there?

«How long have you been on this ship?» Jongho prodded. 

«Well Captain purchased this particular ship six years ago, but I first met him when we were both fifteen,» Seonghwa said. «They helped me find my pod, then I kinda got attached.» 

«Attached?» Jongho could feel dread creeping into his stomach. «You showed him your pod?» 

«Well yeah?» Seonghwa gave Jongho a perplexed look, clearly feeling the way the air shifted. «You look upset.» 

«How could you get attached to a pirate?» Jongho could feel the volume of his voice rising. «They’re vile, and evil. Them as well as humans, how could you be attached to that? Show your family to them? Don’t you know the danger?!»

«What are you talking about?» Seonhwa asked, looking genuinely taken aback. «All pirates aren’t like that, and certainly not all humans.»

«Yes they are!» Jongho didn’t know why he was so upset. 

The mermaid could be as delusional as he wanted, it didn't matter to Jongho. It didn’t matter if the mermaid hadn’t experienced what Jongho had. It didn't matter if Seonghwa was here of his own free will, it didn’t. But how could he? 

Humans and pirates were vile, disgusting beings. How could someone like Seonghwa, who should be so similar to Jongho, not see that? 

«Jongho-ssi, do you mean to tell me you hate all humans?» Seonghwa asked. «That you hate someone purely based on what they are?» 

«Of course I hate humans!» Jongho spat. «They’re selfish evil beings that will wipe our kind out any second. Pirates are the same, don’t you know that?» 

«Not everyone is the same,» Seonghwa said, suddenly looking sad again. «If you blindly hate everyone, how can you be different from the people trying to wipe us out?» 

Jongho felt the anger rise in him like a storm. How dared he?

«I’m not fucking like them, you are!» Jongho rose to his feet. What was the matter with the mermaid? How could he be so blinded? «You are the one fraternizing with the enemy, the one showing them where your family is! You’re a fucking traitor to your own kind and a monster!» 

Seonghwa is quiet for a moment. Jongho expected the mermaid to lash out. He was a pirate who would hurt Jongho, especially now when Jongho had given him reason to. He knew he was right, they were all evil. 

Instead Jongho saw tears gather in Seonghwa’s eyes. 

«I’m not a monster,» Seonghwa mumbled, voice tiny. The mermaid suddenly looked so incredibly small and vulnerable. «None of us are.» 

This wasn’t supposed to happen. The mermaid wasn't supposed to get sad. He was a liar, a traitor, he had no reason to be sad. The people who pretended to care were the most dangerous, Jongho learned that though Jihyun. The mermaid had to be trying to trick him. He couldn’t be sad. 

Seonghwa rose to his feet as well and Jongho shuffled backwards, expecting the mermaid to finally drop the act. Instead he saw a single tear fall down Seonghwa's cheek, more soon following before he walked away and towards the stairs. 

At the foot of it the mermaid halted, just like the captain had. 

«When mermaids heal people we connect with their spirit,» Seonghwa's voice was thick with emotion Jongho knew he didn’t fake. «We see and feel physical injuries as well as emotional ones. I know something has hurt you deeply Jongho, that it is still doing it.» 

Seonghwa turned to Jongho. 

«I know how easy it can be to shut people out, to think everyone is the same as the people who hurt you…»

«You lot sure are!» Jongho interrupted. 

«Maybe, but you won’t even see the world for what it is,» Seonghwa turned again. «Your human parent, your Eomma. Was she as evil and vile as you claim all humans are?»

Jongho’s breath stuttered, the question stealing it right out of his lungs. How dare he talk about Eomma, he didn’t know what they’d done to her. He didn’t know anything. 

He was about to bite back but the mermaid was already gone. 

Jongho sat down on the bed, his leg throbbing angrily. He felt hollowed out, like the mermaid had put a curse on him. It hadn’t felt good to hurt him, not like Jongho had wanted it to. It hadn’t felt just, or cathartic or even satisfactory. It had just felt mean. 

Whatever, Jongho didn’t owe the mermaid anything, certainly not an apology. If the mermaid wanted to be in denial then so be it. Jongho wouldn't stop him. He could just be with these slimy pirates if he wanted. Jongho would get out without his help. 

He’d get out and continue with his plan, the King was going to die by Jongho’s hands. Jongho would make it off this goddamn ship and never offer these pirates a thought. He’d see it through, no matter what they dished up for him. 

___________

They were going to be the death of him. Jongho was going to die. 

Hongjoong had lied. Their plan was to torture Jongho into compliance. He had prepared himself for the worst, but somehow they had managed to exceed all his worst nightmares. 

One by one they came down to Jongho’s cell to torture him with their never ending incessant chatter. No matter how little Jongho answered them they wouldn’t stop talking. 

Jongho was used to solitude, he was used to quiet. He was used to not speaking for days, not paying attention to the things around him. He had become an expert at disappearing into his own head, but that didn’t work when these bloody pirates wouldn’t leave him alone. 

Day in and day out at least one of them would walk down to his cell and talk about fucking nothing for at least an hour. Honestly didn’t they have godsdamned things to do?! Did the ship sail by it-fucking-self? 

That was another thing, there seemed to only be seven of them. How could a ship operate with only seven sailors? Jongho knew he had seen more but somehow they were neither talked about or graced Jongho with their presence. Did they keep slaves or something? 

Of the seven you had Hongjoong of course the fucking little rat and Seonghwa the traitor. These two were the ones who visited Jongho the least. Hongjoong probably because hopefully the captain of this godsdamned ship was busy at the very least. Seonghwa was probably still hurt over Jongho’s harsh words, he had at least made himself scarce. Jongho chose to ignore how guilty that made him feel. 

The other five were the main culprits of keeping Jongho in a constant state of hell. They just asked so many unnecessary questions and no matter if Jongho responded or not they would just keep at it. If it had been attempts at interrogation Jongho would understand it, but no interrigator would ask Jongho what is fucking favorite color was or would tell so much about themselves. 

Without wanting to, Jongho learned a lot about the pirates keeping him prisoner. 

He learned they all had a fondness for Yeosang, if they came down in pairs it was usual for them to hang onto his shoulders like they couldn’t stand on their own feet. Unnecessary clingy if you asked Jongho. 

Mingi, who was almost as tall as Yunho -rude- rarely came down alone, big frame often enclosing whoever he was with. He wore his hair in a platinum color, almost silver looking, with long bangs he styles away from his face. He was a careful one, but the second he was near one of the others he became so loud. 

They were all loud if Jongho was being perfectly honest. Loud and obnoxious and so incredibly pestering. The loudest of them all being their youngest Wooyoung, a short man with a high pitch laugh and shoulderlength black hair. 

Jongho was horrified when he learned Wooyoung was their cook. How could someone so freaking annoying make such delicious food? 

«You like my cooking?!» Wooyoung had shrieked when Jongho hadn’t been able to hide his obvious delight at the flavor. At least the pirates kept Jongho wellfed with at least three meals a day. «That’s so sweet! Do you have a favorite dish? Something you want me to make you?! Just tell me what it is and I’ll make it for you!» 

Wooyoung had then proceeded to talk about food for an hour straight. Jongho must have passed away and gone to hell, it was the only explanation for this. 

Jongho also learned the pirates genuinely cared for one another, he’d be a fool not to see that. He learned they had been together for quite a while, their demeanor speaking of years of closeness. He learned Yeosang loved chicken and Mingi scared easily. Hongjoong apparently hated vegetables according to Wooyoung and their youngest was a known menace. 

They didn’t get angry with Jongho when he didn’t answer. Didn’t push him to speak. Didn’t try to make him help them. They just made sure he was not alone for long and kept being polite. They talked to him like he was their friend and it was infuriating. 

Yet, despite their friendly attitude Jongho could tell they were being cautious around him. Not standing too close to the bars of the cell unless they had to, always bringing weapons with them. So they weren't completely inept, but it made things rather difficult for Jongho.  

The days ticked by and Jongho’s deadline approached. He had to get out of there. But he couldn’t. He was strong yes but not enough to bend the metal bars away. There was no way to get out without making some noise but if he made noise they heard. 

They were always close by and it was becoming a problem as Jongho grew more and more hungry. It had already started to consume his sleep and thoughts, the pirates themself becoming more and more appeticing. They were all healthy, beautiful men and Jongho wanted to eat them. They all smelled better and better the more time went by, like a piece of steak waiting for him. 

Jongho was appalled at the thoughts but the longer he was trapped there the worse it got. He could feel saliva pool in his mouth like he was a beast when he heard one of them approaching. His stomach grumbled no matter how much food he studer himself with, growling like the monster Jongho felt like. 

«You seem really hungry,» Wooyoung said one day, squinting at Jongho who sat on the bed clutching his stomach. «Do you want me to bring you more food?» 

Food food food. Jongho needed food. He needed he needed he needed…

But no he wouldn’t tell, wouldn’t ask. Shameful. Didn’t want them to see. To know. Monster. Monster. Monster. 

Jongho broke.

The hunger was everywhere. 

Jongho’s fangs fell in, pricking his bottom lip. As soon as the metallic taste of blood filled his mouth his stomach howled, filling his while being with want. He moaned at the taste, sucking more of it down his throat. 

He needed to feed, he needed food he needed. 

He should have told them. Fuck his stupid pride and shame they could have fed him. They had no qualms about killing people they could have found someone, anyone. 

Jongho needed to feed it had never been so bad before. 

The smell of blood oozed from the bandage on his leg and Jongho wanted. He wanted his leg, he wanted blood, he wanted flesh. 

He smelled them all up there, the pirates, those fleshy snacks just waiting for him to sink his terte into them. 

Jongho smacked a hand against his forehead. 

Stop it! He thought desperately. It’s just the hunger talking. Stop!

Jongho pressed his hands to his stomach, curling up on the bed in a fatal position. He was going to die. The hunger would kill him. He was going to die. But surely that would be better than this.

Jongho wailed in agony before everything went black. 

               _____________

Yeosang was the one who heard the commotion first. He woke up, groggy and confused, wondering why he had woken up at all. Mingi was curled up around him, long arm draped over his waist as he snored peacefully. Wooyoung was on his other side, face down on his stomach with limbs spread like a starfish. 

Yeosang was about to turn around and go back to sleep when he heard it again, a distant mess of noises. A snarling growling sound, banging against wood and metal. It was coming from below, like the sea itself was crying. 

Slowly as not to wake his partners, Yeosang rose to his feet, bare feet shuffling over the deck. Was something wrong with one of the Hallows? Was Hongjoong’s spell going haywire? 

He grabbed one of their swords on the way down, just in case. The room the Hallows were in was quiet, those of them there sitting eerily still in row after row. Not moving even a breath. It wasn’t them. The sound was coming from deeper still. 

Oh shit. The siren. Jongho. 

Yeosang ran down the stairs, sword ready in hand. What if the siren had found a way to escape? What if he had called someone there to help him? They still knew so little about him, he could have friends out there who would come for him.  

When Yeosang hit the store deck the smell of blood hit him in the face like a punch. It smelled like a slaughterhouse, metallic and heavy, making Yeosang gag. But the smell didn’t prepare Yeosang for what he saw. 

If Yeosang hadn’t had the training he had, he would have dropped his sword at the shock of the sight welcoming him. 

The siren was eating himself. Or at least, he seemed to try to. 

Jongho’s eyes had become larger, glowing purple in the dim light and slitted pupils flying around as if he was possessed. The whole cell was covered in blood, but Jongho was dripping in it. His teeth were sharp and huge, too big for his mouth as he kept biting down on his own hands, his chest, his legs. 

As soon as his own teeth pierced his skin, the siren would wail in pain and let go. As if he didn’t know who was causing him pain. Only to growl and lap at the blood like a dog, before he snarled and hit his head against the wall. Again and again and again, like he wanted to make himself pass out. 

Even from where Yeosang was standing he could hear the crack. Was it Jongho’s skull or the wood?

«Stop!» Yeosang yelled. What the fuck was happening?

Jongho’s eyes landed on him and Yeosang felt fear shoot up his spine. That wasn’t Jongho. That was an animal. A rabid animal that was starving. 

Jongho flung himself against the bars, clawed hands trying to reach Yeosang through them. Yeosang jumped back, even though he was at a safe distance, clutching his sword close. 

The siren smashed himself against the bars once, twice, thrice... he didn’t stop. He broke one of his own teeth trying to bite through the bar, seemingly not feeling pain anymore. Yeosang watched in horror as Jongho broke his own hands against the bars, bones sticking out of his skin and blood splashing on the wooden floor. 

Yeosang ran upstairs, shouting for help. The door to the shared bedroom flew open, revealing most of his lovers still in their sleepwear and ruffled from sleep, but all of them had their swords at the ready. 

«What’s going on?» San asked, looking around Yeosang for the danger. 

«There's something wrong with Jongho!» Yeosang ran further up, they’d need everyone. «We have to stop him!» 

Yeosang was up and over the deck, wrenching open Hongjoong’s door in a matter of moments. The captain bolted to his feet at the sound of his door banging open, Yunho not far behind him. 

«It’s Jongho! Help!» Yeosang heaved before he turned on his heels, still barefoot, and screamed for Seonghwa who had the watch in the crow’s nest. «Seonghwa! There is something wrong with Jongho!»

When they all got down to Jongho’s cell it had gotten even worse. The siren had smashed his head so viciously into the bars the bones in his face had to be broken. Jongho was just a mass of beaten flesh and blood, breaking himself more and more as he seemingly couldn’t stop smashing his broken body against the metal. 

Hongjoong swore and started casting a spell, but whatever he cast did nothing. Jongho just snarled and started biting at the bars again,  completely feral.  

«What the fuck is going on?» Wooyoung screeched, looking to Yeosang for answers. 

«I don’t know! He was trying to eat himself when I found him!» Yeosang gestured wildly at the siren. «He started trying to bash his head in when he noticed me!» 

«What do we do?!» Mingi asked, looking at Hongjoong with panicked eyes. «If he continues like this he’ll die!»  

Hongjoong stood frozen for a moment, but only for a moment, before he snapped his fingers. A dozen Hallows marched down to the already cramped cell, sword ready in their hands. Hongjoong gave the key to the cell to one of them, then ordered; 

«Stand back! They’re going to try to restrain him!» 

They all shuffled backwards, for once not keen to be in the front. As soon as the cell door was open Jongho flew at the Hallows like a rabid dog. 

In the blink of an eye Jongho was on top of one, jaw open as he ate at the Hallow. One big chunk of meat after another the siren feasted on the Hallow, blood spraying everywhere. 

The other Hallows still tried to restrain Jongho, but the siren wouldn’t let his meal go. Mouth almost seemed attached to the bloody meatsack that could no longer be identified as a human. 

Yeosang thought it would be over when Jongho had eaten his fill but the siren just attacked another one. Their attempt of force only being taken as an invitation to be his next meal. 

Wooyoung grabbed Yeosang’s shoulder, the other hand over his mouth. Yeosang saw the others have similar expressions of horror and disgust, Mingi looking like he was two seconds away from throwing up. 

When five Hallows had been torn apart and swallowed, Jongho finally seemed to calm down. Hongjoong stopped the remaining Hallows from grabbing the siren when he slowly sat back on his heels. Their captain was clearly weary of Jongho’s next move. 

They all watched as Jongho’s teeth and claws disappeared, retracting back into his broken body. One eye was swollen shut, the other seemed to slowly wake up, blinking sluggishly. 

Yeosang saw the exact moment Jongho returned to himself, eye staring at the bloody chunks of flesh around him. The siren moaned in pain and sank into himself before he looked up at the spectators he’d had during the whole ordeal. 

«Oh fuck,» the siren mumbled. Then he fell over before any of them had time to react. Limp as a corpse.