Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

PW: “mr rok iz lonely” 

Pete Wentz had been ‘taking care’ of the small piece of Middletona rock that Mikey had given him during the band trip, frequently sending updates via text. 

‘You are such a dork, Pete’ Mikey thought to himself as he opened the text, quickly typing one back. 

MM: “r u feeding him? he’s a growing boy”

PW: “well fed as always, but u should visit him”

Mikey tried hard to conceal his grin, knowing Illi would tease him if she saw Pete Wentz was making him smile. 

MM: “now?”

PW: “ur welcome anytime, mcmlln”

Mikey was sure his cheeks were pink, but he didn’t care. He laid back in his bed, staring up at the ceiling, hoping and praying Illi was engrossed enough in whatever she was doing to not question him when he left. He got up, sliding down the ladder of his bunk bed, looking down at his sister. 

“Hi Mikey.” She didn’t look up from her phone. 

“Hi. I’m going out.”

“Where?” She vaguely turned her head to him, “To Pete’s?”

Mikey blushed, “No..?”

She snorted, “Okay, liar.”

“It’s none of your business where I’m going.”

“Jeez, god forbid I love you and want you to be safe. When are you gonna be home?” Illi asked, fully looking at him now. 

“God, you’re not Mom. Stop interrogating me.”

“Just.. don’t be stupid. And text me if you’re gonna spend the night.”

Mikey huffed, “And what if I don’t?”

“I’ll send Frank over to ruin your sleepover.” Illi stuck out her tongue at him. 

“Fine. I’ll let you know. I don’t even know if anything is gonna happen.” Mikey spoke nervously, knowing it was most likely a lie. 

He didn’t know exactly what was going to happen when he went to Pete’s. He had never been to Pete’s. He had also never made out with a boy before the trip. If Pete was a chick, he knew he’d be getting laid. It was the logical next step. But Pete? The expectations were entirely unknown to Mikey. 

“Don’t let him push you into doing something you’re not comfortable with.” Illi put her phone down to stare her brother down. 

“I- I won’t.” Mikey felt open and exposed, “I’m nervous, Illi.”

“That means you care, Mikes.”

Mikey nodded, taking out his phone, typing back a response. 

MM: “wats ur address?”

Pete was quick to respond, and Mikey found himself speed walking towards the bus stop, mp3 player blasting music through his cheap earbuds. Pete’s home was on the nice side of town, and walking down his street felt like an entirely different town from where Mikey and Illi lived. 

He counted the houses, finally arriving in front of Pete’s. It was a huge house, with a fresh paint job and ornately trimmed hedges. Mikey nervously stepped up to the front door, giving it a timid knock. 

Pete opened the door quickly, a huge grin on his face, “McMillin! You made it! I was starting to wonder if you got lost.”

“I kinda felt like I was lost when I turned onto your street.” Mikey chuckled, “You live in a big house.”

“That I do.” Pete sighed, “My folks are never around so it feels pretty big and empty most of the time.”

Mikey nodded, and stepped through the doorway, taking his shoes off, as he was trained to do when entering a new house. Pete was padding around in his socks, showing Mikey around the house. 

“And here’s the pool. I think I’m gonna throw a few parties over the summer so we can actually get some use out of it.” Pete gestured grandly, “My folks are gonna be in Italy during the Fourth of July, so that’s, like, the perfect time to throw a rager.”

Mikey nodded along, “Would I be invited?”

“Of course you would, McMillin, you and your sister, Frank, Ray.. I’ll probably invite Trick, Andy and Joe.”

“Patrick? Really?” Mikey snorted, “He seems like the type to call the cops on a house party.”

Pete chuckled, “I know, he totally does, but Patrick is really fun when he’s drunk. He always drinks the punch and pretends like he doesn’t know it’s spiked, even though I spike it every time.”

Mikey observed Pete as he led him upstairs, and into a large bedroom. Warm sunshine enveloped the room, peaking through the partially opened curtains. In the middle of the room against the back wall was Pete’s bed, his blankets haphazardly spread across to give the illusion of a made bed. Pete moved to his bookshelf, picking up the Middletona rock lookalike. 

“Look, our son.” Pete handed the rock to Mikey, who smiled. 

“Aww. Our sweet little dude.” Mikey turned it around in his fingers.

“Sweet little dude? That’s adorable. That should be our gang name.”

Mikey snorted, “Our gang name?”

“Yeah. Just for the two of us. Sweet little dudes.”

“And Mr. Rock.”

“Eh, he’s too sweet to be in a gang. But us? I think we would make a good gang.” Pete took the rock from Mikey, placing it back on the shelf. 

Pete walked up to Mikey, looking up at him. Mikey felt his heart begin to race as Pete’s hands touched his waist.

“Hi.” Mikey squeaked out.

“Hi~” Pete smirked, “Y’know.. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”

Mikey inhaled shakily, feeling incredibly nervous, “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you either.”

Pete’s mouth hovered just in front of Mikey’s, “Should we.. do something about that?” 

Mikey pressed his lips against Pete’s, catching the shorter boy by surprise, and he smirked against Mikey’s lips. Mikey threw his arms over Pete’s shoulders, pulling them closer together. 

Mikey wasn’t sure what took over him, but he copied what Pete had done last time, hooked his fingers through the loops of Pete’s jeans, pulling their hips together. Pete let out a groan, almost like a purr, as their hips rubbed together, friction building between their jeans. 

Pete’s fingers ran along the bottom of Mikey’s t-shirt, his fingertips grazing the sensitive skin of his waist, causing the other to shiver in delight. Mikey let his fingers trail up to Pete’s waist, pushing his shirt up. He let go of Mikey, raising his arms above his head to allow him to take his shirt off. 

Mikey stared at his body, taking in his slim, tan figure, and his abdomen tattoo: the heart with bat wings. Mikey couldn’t help himself, he brought his fingers to the tattoo, tracing it, watching as Pete tensed beneath his touch, biting his lip. 

“I swear to god.. you’re such a tease.” Pete breathed. 

Mikey paused, pulling away from Pete to remove his own shirt, looking down at Pete. Their eyes met and Pete’s warm brown eyes were filled with pure lust. He opened his mouth for a moment, then closed it. 

“What?” Mikey smirked at him.

“I- I probably shouldn’t.”

“No, go on.”

Pete looked nervous for a second, then took a deep breath, “I don’t wanna scare you off… but fuck, man, I’ve been craving you.”

Mikey felt his face go hot, “Craving.. me..?”

“Your body against mine- fuck- I can’t stop- it’s totally distracting me in everything I do.”

Mikey closed the gap between their bodies, their bare chests and waists touching, “I can satisfy your craving.”

Their lips met again, Pete leading in passion, rubbing up against Mikey. He guided Mikey to the bed, laying him down sweetly before bringing their lips together again, grinding their hips together. 

Pete started pressing kisses down Mikey’s neck, nipping and sucking along the sensitive skin, causing Mikey to groan beneath him. If Pete could replay those sounds on loop forever, he would. His kisses trailed down further, down his chest and to his stomach. 

“Y’know, I’ve joked for years that I’m gay above the belt…” Pete spoke as he kissed along Mikey’s waist, “But.. you make me wanna try below the belt.”

Mikey was absolutely blushing the hardest he had ever blushed before as he brought a hand to Pete’s hair, running his hand through it, “I.. I would be willing to try.”

Pete paused, looking up at him through his dark hair partially covering his face, “I only wanna do this if you're absolutely sure.”

For a moment, the world stopped as Mikey and Pete stared at each other, silence hanging in the air as Mikey hesitated, trying to find the right words to say. 

“I’ve never been with a man before, Pete, I’m scared.” Mikey finally blurted out, “What am I supposed to do?!”

Pete lifted himself up to look at Mikey, “You’ve been doing everything well so far, handsome.”

“Just- I- I don’t- I think I’m a little overwhelmed.”

Pete nodded, laying down next to Mikey, "That's alright, dude, I don’t wanna pressure you.”

Mikey stared up at the ceiling, reaching over and squeezing Pete’s hand. Everything was so new to him, and even though he liked it, the thought of Pete touching him below the belt was terrifying in a way he couldn’t describe. 

Pete’s arms wrapped around Mikey’s bare waist as he cuddled into his side, pressing soft kisses on Mikey’s jaw. He felt as Pete tapped out the rhythm to whatever song was in his head onto his skin, and Mikey started tracing patterns into the skin of Pete’s shoulder, pondering what he should do next.

Chapter Text

“So, this is Pete’s house?” Illi asked as Ray’s car pulled into the driveway, “Mikey, you failed to mention that Pete was rich.”

“Never seemed important.” Mikey shrugged, sitting uncomfortably in the backseat of Ray’s beat up honda civic. 

“I feel like my car is bringing down the property value by parking here.” Ray joked, pulling the parking break. 

“Good, let’s bring down property value.” Frank flashed a toothy grin, “I’m pretty sure this party is gonna bring down the value too.”

Illi wasn’t even sure why she was at this party. She could’ve been reading comic books, or drawing comics, or writing comics… Ray opening her car door shook her from her comics thoughts. 

“Oh, thanks, Ray.” She chuckled, stepping out of the car, looking up at him, “Always the gentleman.”

Ray’s cheeks flushed pink, “Anything for you.”

Frank leapt out of the car, scoffing loudly, running around to the back and popping the trunk. They each grabbed their swim bags and wandered up to Pete’s front door. Mikey tried the door without knocking, and it swung open. Mikey wandered in like it was his own house, and Pete noticed him immediately.

“McMillin! You made it!” His grin was that of a totally in love idiot, “Ray didn’t get lost?”

“Nope! I tend to not do that.” Ray quipped, but Pete’s attention was fully on Mikey. 

“We successfully made it.” Mikey offered Pete a small smile. 

“Great, well, welcome!” Pete finally turned to the rest of the group, “Feel free to keep your shoes on, I don’t care. The pool is in the back, there’s a hot tub, and Mikey and I are gonna get the snacks and drinks started.”

Illi snorted, causing Mikey to glare at her. Mikey hasn’t helped in hosting a party ever. He was allergic to helping their mom do anything. Illi saw right through that lie, and Mikey knew it. 

“Sounds good, thanks man.” Ray grinned, “Where’s the bathroom, by the way?”

Illi watched as Pete gave directions, then started to make her way to the back of the house through the living room, taking in the sights of the house. Upon entering the living room, she noticed a large painting above the fireplace of Pete’s family, of his mom, his dad, and Pete at about age 5. 

“Look at that dumbass.” Frank pointed and laughed, “He was such an ugly baby.”

“It’s kinda haunting, in a way.” Illi ignored Frank’s comment, “Have you ever heard about Pete’s parents?”

“I mean, he told me once that they’re never around.”

Illi nodded, “It’s just.. I don’t know.. I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

“Does he kinda remind you of Batman?” Ray appeared behind Illi, and she turned to look at him. 

“I think that might be it.”

“Well, my parents aren’t dead, but if you’re calling me dark, mysterious, and sexy then I’ll take it.” Pete called from the kitchen, grinning. 

Illi chuckled, “I think we’re just calling you rich, dude.”

“Oh, I know.” Pete chuckled, “The size of the house reminds me.”

Illi, Frank, and Ray made their way to the pool, where Andy, Joe, and Patrick were already enjoying themselves. Upon seeing them, they waved, and Patrick swam up to the edge of the pool, eager to chat. 

“Hello Illi, Raymond, Franklin.” He nodded at each of them, and Frank rolled his eyes in response, “Care to join us?”

Illi shrugged, “Sure, let me just go get changed.”

She had her swimsuit on underneath her clothes, but the idea of removing any article of clothing in front of a pool full of teenage boys felt particularly strange. She padded her way back into the house and to the bathroom. 

After removing her skirt and shirt, she stared at herself in the mirror. Her black and white striped swim top pulled all the way down, and her cute little black shorts covered up all she wanted to cover, but left her pale legs exposed. 

‘I hope I don’t tan.’ She thought to herself, ‘I wanna stay pasty forever.’ 

As she exited the bathroom, she decided to sneak past the kitchen, tiptoeing as to not be heard. She peeked from around the doorway to spy on her brother and his lover and she immediately regretted her decision. 

Pete had Mikey pushed up against the kitchen counter, his hands gripping Mikey’s waist. Mikey had his hands tangled in Pete’s dark hair, and she swore she could hear Pete moaning. 

‘Okay, yeah. I don’t know why I expected anything else,’ She thought, immediately turning away and leaving as quickly as she could.

As she stepped through the back door towards the pool, she immediately felt multiple pairs of eyes on her. “Is there something behind me? You’re all creeps.” She said lightheartedly.

“No, no!” Ray’s face was red, “Sorry!”

“Come join us, Illi.” Patrick grinned, “The water is warm~”

Illi fought the urge to roll her eyes as she sat down at the edge of the pool, sticking her feet in the water. Ray swam up, sitting next to her in the shallow part of the pool, looking up at her and smiling. 

“Why aren’t you getting in?” Patrick called out to her, “We don’t bite!”

A huge wave of water washed over the group as Frank took a cannonball leap into the pool, drenching everyone nearby.

After shaking out his wet hair, Patrick swam up to Illi, grabbing at her ankles to drag her into the pool. She yelped, kicking at him before she hit the water, splashing about manically. 

“No! Patrick! She can’t swim!” Ray called out as Illi was smacking at Patrick’s arms, cursing loudly. 

“What? What kind of 17-year-old can’t swim?” Patrick asked, still being hit by Illi. 

“Me! I can’t swim!” Illi shouted, finally getting her bearings as Ray helped her back to the shallow end and she could touch the bottom of the pool. 

“Why?” Patrick pushed, and she glared at him. 

“I don’t know! I just can’t!” She spluttered. 

”Why would you come to a pool party if you don’t know how to swim?”

”It’s a 4th of July party, Patrick.” She retorted, “The pool is just here.”

“I can teach you how to swim if you want.” Patrick had this weird grin on his face like he was attempting to smirk. 

“Uh.. I’m good.” She let out a nervous chuckle, looking over at Ray for help. 

Ray stood by her side, looking at her, then over at Patrick, then back at her. The conversation was interrupted by Frank spraying Patrick directly in the face with a Super Soaker, cackling. Andy and Joe joined in on the fun, grabbing at whatever water guns were available around Pete’s pool, squirting at each other and at Illi and Ray, who were just trying to hang out in the shallow end. 

Ray eventually stepped out of the pool and made his way to the hot tub, Illi following shortly after him. They sat together, Ray’s arms along the back of the tub. They only had a few moments of peace before Frank stepped in, wincing at the heat of the tub. 

“Why do you guys even like this thing?” He pouted, barely ankle deep in the hot water, “It’s too hot.”

“It’s relaxing.” Illi blinked at him. 

Frank finally eased his way in, sitting across from Illi, staring at her and Ray. Silence rang between them as Illi closed her eyes, letting her head lull back. 

“It’s boring here.” Frank whined, and Illi opened an eye to peer over at him. 

“Nothing is keeping you here. You can leave whenever you want.” Illi responded. 

“But I wanna spend time with you, Illi! I feel like I haven’t seen you all summer.” Frank’s voice cracked slightly. 

“Summer just started, dude.” Illi sighed, “And we literally just hung out like 2 days ago.”

Frank pouted, “You’re always hanging out with Ray by yourself. Why don’t we ever hang out?”

“Illi and I have known each other since we were kids.” Ray offered, “We hang out a lot.”

“So why don’t I get to spend time with Illi alone?”

“First off, you’ve never asked me.” Illi started counting, holding up her fingers, “Second, what would we even do?”

“I don’t know! Just like.. walk or something?” Frank huffed, “There’s, like, nothing to do around here.”

“There is nothing to do around here.” Illi confirmed, “So I don’t know what you want from me.”

“Who wants snacks?!” Pete shouted, and everyone turned to look at him, “And we’ve got punch!”

“I’ll bet you 10 bucks the punch is spiked.” Ray turned to mutter in Illi’s ear. 

“I’ll bet you 10 that Mikey’s gonna get wasted.” Illi whispered back. 

Frank nearly jumped out of the hot tub, making his way to the table where Pete was setting up the snacks and drinks. Illi watched from her spot in the tub as the boys crowded around the table, filling paper plates up with chips and candy and solo cups with mystery punch. 

Mikey padded up to the hot tub, looking down at Illi and Ray, adding, “There’s Dr. Pepper in the cooler under the table.”

Illi smiled at her brother, “Thanks, Mikes.”

“I know you don’t drink, so I made sure Pete had something non-alcoholic.” Mikey then turned to Ray, “I don’t know what you like to drink… I think there’s some other soda in there.”

“I’m fine with anything, man, thanks.” Ray gave him a big grin that could light up a room. 

Mikey stepped back over to the snack table, and Pete pulled him back into the house. ‘No doubt for another round of whatever that was I saw earlier.’ Illi thought to herself. 

“So… something’s happening between Pete and Mikey.. right?” Ray muttered in Illi’s ear. 

“Absolutely. I saw them making out in the kitchen earlier.” She responded softly as to not be heard by others. 

Ray raised his brows, laughing, “No way. Like crazy style?”

Illi shuddered at the memory, “Ugh. I don’t wanna think about it.”

Ray got out of the hot tub first, making his way out and towards the towels, taking one for himself, and then brought one back for Illi. 

“For the lady,” He offered, and she rolled her eyes. 

“Oh yeah, a real lady.” She grumbled. 

“You’re a lady to me.” Ray gave her a soft smile, “And you always will be.”

She stepped out, graciously taking the towel to cover herself, “Thanks, Toro.”

They made their way to the snack table, grabbing their sodas and snack food, joining the group sitting on various lawn and patio furniture. The discussion amongst the group varied, but was mostly useless nerd stuff, with the occasional school gossip. Illi kept an eye out for her brother, and found it a bit suspicious that he and his lover didn’t make another appearance. It wasn’t until the pizza arrived that any of them saw Mikey and Pete again, as they marched outside with multiple boxes, to the cheers of tipsy teenagers.

Chapter Text

After eating, Mikey was quick to slip Pete away from the crowd, barely making it out of eyesight before he smashed his lips against Pete’s. The punch had given him the confidence boost he needed to get past his nerves. Pete grabbed Mikey’s hand, leading him up the stairs to his bedroom, hearts pounding. 

“Can’t even keep your hands off of me?” Pete teased, and Mikey only pulled away to close the curtains, keeping them hidden away from prying eyes outside. 

“Shut up.” Mikey breathed as he pushed Pete up against the door. 

“Make me, McMillin.”

Mikey started kissing down Pete’s neck, locking the door behind him as he kissed along his now dry skin, previously wet from the chlorinated pool. Pete groaned, shifting his hips, running his hands through Mikey’s spikey dirty blond hair. 

Pete ran his hands along Mikey’s exposed waist, as they were both just in their swim trunks still. Mikey shivered at the touch, and Pete was desperate to feel every inch of the boy in front of him. 

Pete’s obsession with Mikey came hard and fast from their moment together at Middletona Rock. He had always thought Mikey was kinda cute, but he had reserved himself to never having him, as Mikey was very much into girls. Well, at least, he was. All of Pete’s thoughts had been replaced with thoughts of Mikey: His endearingly strange hair, his thin glasses, that beautiful smile that only peeked out when you earned it, his intoxicating waist and hips, the awkward way he did practically anything. Pete was drawn in, hook, line, and sinker. His physical journals were full of entries about Mikey, locked away to never be seen. His online journals were full of poetry about him. 

But being here in person with him was all the sweeter, having him kissing along his neck, just as passionate as he was.. He wanted to capture this moment and keep it for whenever he was sad. But he knew he couldn’t. Deep down he knew Mikey didn’t want this captured. 

He pushed Mikey off of him, catching his lips in his as he pushed him down on the bed, crawling over him, looking down. Mikey’s hazel eyes met Pete’s warm brown eyes, both of their chests rising and falling breathless from the earlier kissing. 

Pete ran his hands along Mikey’s waist, watching the other boy for his reaction as his hands trailed further down to his hips, then to his thighs, then back up to his hips, his thumbs peeking under the waistband of his trunks. 

“What do you think, McMillin?” The invitation was open, lustful, but respectful. 

Mikey knew Pete would stop if he asked him to, he knew he would. But Mikey was just drunk enough to swallow his fear, and nod curtly.

“Now, now, that’s not gonna work for me.” Pete smirked, “Tell me you want it.”

Mikey’s eyes met Pete’s, flickering across his torso and waist, seeing his tattoo, and he looked back up at Pete, “I’m ready.”

~

Downstairs where the rest of the party was, Patrick found himself feeling increasingly more giddy and reckless, as the punch was a lot stronger than he thought it would be. He approached Illi, who was sitting next to Andy, discussing.. well.. he wasn’t sure. 

“Miss Illi.” He sat next to her, feeling his vision going a little wobbly, “How are you tonight?”

“Better now that you’re not trying to drown me in the pool.” She chuckled, “How are you, Patrick?”

“I’m doing.. greaaat.” He was trying not to slur his words, but was failing, “I wanted to ask you.. some questions…”

“Go for it?” She looked apologetically at Andy, who was gleefully amused by the free entertainment that was drunken Patrick. 

“So.. what else do you play besides the bassoon?” He leaned against the back of his chair, taking off his hat and putting it back on. 

“Uh, I don’t really play anything else.” She blinked after him, “I guess I started on the clarinet, but I hated it.”

“I thought I heard you singing on the band trip.” Patrick grinned mischievously, “You know.. we’ve been looking for altos in our choir.”

“Oh god, no, I don’t wanna be in the choir.” She chuckled nervously, “But if I was I would want to be a soprano… because I am a soprano.”

Patrick let out a laugh, and Illi glared at him. He quickly shut himself up, “Sorry, it’s just.. you’re definitely not a soprano.”

“Does it even matter? I wanna be a soprano.”

“But you’ve got a deeper singing voice. You should be an alto at least, maybe even a tenor-“

“A tenor?! No. That’s where boys sing. And I’m not a boy.” She shook her head, “Soprano all the way. And I’m not gonna join the choir.”

“But please???” Patrick whined, “We need a strong voice like yours.”

“No! I don’t have enough time to do it anyways.” She huffed, “I’m thinking of auditioning for youth orchestra.”

“Traitor!” Patrick pointed his finger, looking around for Pete, who was missing, then turned back to her, “Only traitors play in orchestra.”

“Ray plays in orchestra.” Illi countered, “Is Ray a traitor too??”

“I didn’t know that! Ray is a traitor too!” He exclaimed, “How dare you!”

Illi giggled, “I do it just to piss you off, Patrick.”

~

A dare from Andy later and the house filled with the sound of wet feet slapping against the ground as Frank ran through the halls, eventually finding the balcony that overlooked the pool. 

“I could totally make it into the pool from here,” he thought, climbing up onto the railing.

The teenagers below began a chant of “jump, jump, jump,” as they pointed up to the boy on the balcony. Frank grinned and launched himself as far as he could, landing in the pool with a massive splash. 

His body buzzed with electricity. He had no idea what was in that punch but it felt great. He’d had alcohol before, but this was his first time being properly drunk. He ran through the halls a few more times to repeat the jump before Joe and Andy started to join him.

Illi rolled her eyes at the boys’ antics from her spot in the hot tub, standing in the middle and crouching low so everything but her head was covered by the water. She slowly turned in a circle, getting lost in her thoughts as she enjoyed the warm water.

Someone sat down beside the hot tub and dipped their feet in. It took her about two rotations before she realized that it was Ray and stopped, looking up at him.

“Having fun there?” He asked with a smile, “Don’t you get dizzy with all that spinning?”

“Yeah, it's nice. You know what, you’d be surprised. I’m really not dizzy at all.” She replied, walking across the hot tub to sit beside his feet.

Ray finished the handful of chips he had grabbed from the snack table and lowered his whole body into the water next to Illi. He rested his arms on the deck outside of the hot tub and Illi moved a tiny bit closer to him, but not too close. He couldn’t help but be reminded of the day at the hot spring when she had gotten close and the way that their faces were both flushed from the heat. 

They sat like that for quite a while before Illi got too hot and decided to go sit on the pool deck in the shade. Ray excused himself to use the bathroom but promised her he would be back.

~

Frank stumbled over to where Illi had taken a seat in the shade on one of the pool lounge chairs.

As Frank sat beside her, Illi could smell the alcohol on his breath. “You’ve been drinking the punch?” She asked him, taking a sip from her soda.

“Yeah, why? It’s really good. Have you had some?”

“No, I don’t like that stuff.”

“Why not?” He whined, leaning in closer to her.

“I just don’t, I don’t know.” Illi really didn’t want to get into the details of how she didn’t drink because she was afraid of losing control of herself, especially when Frank was clearly very drunk.

“Soo…. Where’d Ray go?” Frank asks, raising his eyebrows, a dumb grin pulling across his face. “I’m finally getting my chance.” He thought to himself.

“I’m not really sure, I think he went to the bathroom.” She responded as she took another sip of soda.

Frank’s grin only grew and he scooted a little closer to Illi. “We finally get to spend some time alone together then.” He murmured, more talking to himself than to her.

“I guess?”

He leaned over, pressing his lips against her cheek in a wet, sloppy kiss. Illi froze for a second in shock before putting a hand on his chest and pushing him away.

“What the hell Frank?” She asked as he moved away from her. She wiped his saliva off her cheek with a slightly disgusted look on her face.

He moved away from her, his brown eyes wide and hurt looking. “What’d I do wrong?” He asked, softly at first, “What did I do wrong? I don’t understand.” The volume of Frank’s voice was starting to rise and he scrambled to stand up.

“I know we’ve only known each other since September and you’ve known Ray since you were little, but why are you so different around me?” He asked again with slurred speech, not waiting for her response. His voice was on the verge of shouting.

“No matter how nice I am, how many times we talk or do things together you always fucking brush me off! The whole band trip I was trying to spend time with you and you just ignored me like I didn’t fucking matter to you. You never said anything nice, you only made fun of me!”

Illi leaned back away from him, trying to put some distance between the two of them. She really didn’t know what to say to this and just stared at him, her expression landing somewhere between shock and confusion.

“Why don’t you like me the way you like Ray? I’ve had a crush on you for months but you’re too fucking self-absorbed to notice that! Am I not good enough for you? Is it my height? Because I’m not fucking tall like Toro?”

His shouting was able to be heard throughout the yard and she could feel the eyes of all the other boys on her. It made her cheeks burn. Illi reached out to grab his hands and interrupted his rant, “Frank, Frankie, Frankenstein,” she started, voice calm and even, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’m not interested in you. You’re like an extra brother to me, it would be weird to date someone younger than Mikey.”

Frank scoffed and ripped his hands from hers, “Why the fuck are we even friends if you hate me so much? You’re a cold and soulless person, Illi McMillin!” He turned and stormed off, stumbling a few times as he made his way around the pool, grabbing his backpack and skateboard, and headed out of the yard.

Illi stared on in shock, tears pricking at her eyes but she refused to let them fall. Not here, not with everyone watching. She desperately wished they’d find someone else to stare at but she couldn’t bring herself to say anything about it. Sandals scuffed the ground and a gentle hand was placed on her shoulder. “You okay?” She heard Ray’s voice ask.

The only response she could muster was a minute shake of the head, one that would be almost invisible to those farther away.

“I should go catch him, he’s really drunk and it’s not safe for him to skateboard home like that. I’ll drop him off and then come right back, okay?” Ray said, giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” Illi muttered, still staring off blankly into the distance and trying to keep control of the tears threatening to spill. He didn’t want to leave her like this, but he was afraid Frank would get himself hit by a car. Ray gave her one more squeeze on the shoulder before he left, pausing only for a moment to grab his car keys and wallet from his bag.

Illi sat there for a few minutes more before she got up and walked towards the house, head held high. She ignored the other boys as they tried to talk to her about what had just happened and continued walking, pace quick and intentional. 

Once inside, she wandered around, eventually finding her way to the basement bathroom, which she thought was probably one of the farthest places away from the pool. She closed and locked the door and climbed into the large shower, turning on the water as hot as she could manage and sitting down on the tile bench against the back wall. It was only then that she allowed herself to break. Tears streamed down Illi’s face as her body shook with soft sobs. 

She held her head in her hands, pulling on her hair to try and keep herself grounded. “Way to ruin a friendship, Illi.” She told herself, voice hiccuping between sobs, “Mikey told you about Frank’s stupid crush months ago and you didn’t fucking believe him. God, you’re so stupid!”

Illi stayed downstairs until she had cried herself dry and her eyes were looking a little less red.

Chapter Text

“Frank!” Ray called after the younger boy, who was nearly tripping as he ran out into the street, “Frankie, wait!”

Frank continued on, rage pounding in his ears, seeing too much red to even notice Ray’s shouting.

“Frank!” Ray finally caught up to him, grabbing his shoulder and whipping him around to face him, “Frank, you are not skateboarding home.”

“Fuck you!” Frank shoved Ray back as hard as he could, “I don’t wanna fucking see you right now, Toro.”

“I don’t fucking care!” Ray grabbed him by the front of his damp shirt, “I don’t care how mad you are, Frank, I’m gonna make sure you get home safe.”

He dragged Frank back to his car, practically wrestling him into the back seat of the honda civic, cursing to himself that he was probably gonna have to wash puke out of the seats again. 

“I fucking hate you!” Frank hissed at Ray as he sat down in the driver’s seat, starting the car swiftly. 

“You’ll get over it, Frankie, you’re drunk.” Ray turned to look behind him as he backed the car up, eyes briefly flickering to Frank’s. 

The silent tension in the car was palpable as they drove away from Pete’s, Frank muttering to himself in the backseat. He knew Ray was pissed at him, because there was no music playing in the car. Ray had only ever turned the music off in his car once, when Frank and Mikey were fighting in the backseat, and Ray pulled over, turned the radio off, and lectured both of them like he was their dad; Illi had watched from the passenger seat. 

Hot tears spilled down Frank’s cheeks as he thought about Illi: how beautiful she was when she turned back to him from the passenger seat, her raven hair tucked behind her ear, laughing at his jokes. He wanted to hear that laughter again, but instead, he was trapped in a car with a pissed off Ray. 

Ray Toro… he was so mad at Ray Toro. ‘Stupid fucking Ray Toro.’ He thought to himself.

They pulled into the parking lot of the local grocery store. Frank looked up at Ray, who had cranked his windows down just slightly. “I thought you were bringing me home.”

“You’re too drunk, I don’t wanna send you home like that.” Ray’s voice was stern, “Your mom would kill you, and probably me too. I’m gonna get you something to eat and you’re gonna sober up.”

“I don’t fucking wanna sober up, I wanna go home.” Frank crossed his arms. 

“You don’t have a choice, Frankie. I’ll be right back.” He climbed out of the car and locked the door behind him then headed into the grocery store.

Ray was gone for a few minutes before he returned with a bag of tray dinner rolls and a bottle of water which he tossed into the back at Frank. “Get eating, buddy. And please try not to puke in my car.”

Frank stared at the bag of buns sitting on the seat next to him, “Seriously? Dinner rolls?”

“Carbs are supposed to sober you up.” Ray shrugged, “If you weren’t vegetarian I’d get us burgers.”

Frank sighed, cracking open the water bottle, taking a small sip, “You’re an asshole, Toro.”

“Yeah, yeah. Tell me something I don’t know.” Ray chuckled, “You really caused quite the scene there, Frankie.”

Frank closed the water bottle, tossing it onto the seat next to him and glared up at Ray, “It’s not my fucking fault. She pushed me away.”

“Well, dude, kissing people without asking kinda gets you pushed.”

“It was on the cheek! How is that so bad?” Frank slammed his fist into the seat, breathing heavily, “This is all your fault!”

Ray snorted, “My fault how?”

“You! Illi fucking loves you!” Frank was shouting again, “If you weren’t around, she would love me instead! You and your fucking stupid hair and your stupid height! And your stupid guitar playing-”

Ray ran a hand through his hair self-consciously, muttering, “Stupid…?”

“-and the whole ‘we’ve known each other since we were kids’ thing! I fucking hate you!!” Frank spat at him, “I hate you! I wish I never met you! You stole her from me!”

A deep sigh escaped from Ray as he looked back at him, “I’m not going to take any of that to heart because you’re so fucked up right now. Just eat your buns and we can talk about this tomorrow if you’re that passionate about it.”

“You’re such a cunt!” Frank kicked the back of the driver’s seat.

The absurdity of the situation made Ray laugh. The boy was kicking and screaming in his backseat like a toddler having a tantrum, tears streaming down his face.

They sat in the grocery store parking lot for nearly 20 minutes before Frank had calmed down enough for Ray to feel comfortable starting the car up and driving towards his house. It didn’t take long to get there, and Ray stepped out of the car to walk Frank to the door. Frank wasn’t resisting Ray’s help anymore, seemingly tired from his earlier breakdown. As Frank unlocked his front door, he turned back to Ray. His eyes were big and watery, and he was chewing on his lip ring, staring up at him.

“Thanks, Ray.” He muttered, barely audible.

“You’re welcome, Frankie.” Ray brought a hand up to ruffle the other boy’s hair, “Goodnight, bud.”

~

It was nearly 45 minutes before Illi came back out to the backyard. She had found herself a new spot in a chair beside the pool and was sitting off to the side, away from the others as she half-heartedly picked the pepperonis off a slice of pizza. She stared down at the table and her pizza slice, eating each individual pepperoni piece bitterly.

She had been enjoying the party, but that fight with Frank had really soured her mood and she now found herself counting down the seconds until she could leave. Of course, that wasn’t entirely her decision, as she had to wait until both Ray and Mikey were ready to go home, and guessing by the fact she had no idea where either of them were, that wasn’t any time soon.

Patrick had tried to call her over to join them in the pool again several times but she just ignored them. She found herself feeling like an outcast, a feeling she was all too familiar with, but it was particularly shocking to feel like that when you’re surrounded by other social outcasts. 

The sound of a metal chair scraping across the pavement and an all too familiar voice shook Illi from her thoughts.

“Jeez, what’d that pizza ever do to you, Illi?” Mikey said as he sat down on the chair, “Where’d Ray and Frankie go?”

“Ray took Frank home because he was causing problems. Where the fuck were you?” She asked, her gaze remaining fixed on the pizza slice. She didn’t want to risk eye contact with Mikey in case he noticed that she had been crying.

“What kind of problems?” He asked, cheeks going bright red when his sister questioned where he had been for most of the party. “Um, I’ve been busy.” He squeaked.

“Problems that I don’t want to talk about.” Illi glanced up briefly to see her brother’s face and let out a hollow laugh, “Michael James!” 

She smacked him on his stomach with the back of her hand, “I don’t need to hear details; I accidentally saw you two in the kitchen when we first got here and then I needed to bleach my eyeballs.”

“Ugh, don’t be so dramatic.” Mikey rolled his eyes, “You.. you didn’t tell anyone though.. Did you?”

“Why would I ever do that, dearest brother?” She finally looked up at him, leaning her chin on her hands. She had told Ray, but she trusted that he would keep it quiet. 

“I don’t know, I just- “ he sighed, “I can’t explain it. I don’t want everyone to hear. Just in case.”

If Mikey had noticed that her eyes were still a bit red and puffy he didn’t mention it, which she was grateful for. He reached over to steal one of the pepperonis off her pizza.

“There’s more over there, get your own!” She said, smacking him playfully on the hand, “Just in case?” 

Mikey paused, looking down at the ground, his glasses hanging at the tip of his nose, “It’s just… you know… not everyone is cool with that.”

Illi knew better than anyone there that ‘not everyone is cool with that’ was an understatement. She didn’t want Mikey to hide, she wanted him to be out and proud with Pete. Well, maybe not to the point where she could see them making out, but she didn’t want him to be ashamed of his affection for Pete.

She simply nodded in response.

“Are you having fun? You seem kinda sad,” he asked, then nudged her with his elbow, “Is it because Ray isn’t here?”

“It’s fine, I was having lots of fun earlier. I think I’m just tired.” She explained. It always felt bad lying to her brother, but she’d rather not drag him into her issues when he wasn’t even there to witness them. “Shut up! No, it’s not because Ray isn’t here right now!”

“Surrrre…” Mikey dragged out the word for emphasis, staring back at his sister as if he could read her mind. She rolled her eyes, and he stood up to get his own pizza, “Do you want anything?”

“I think I’m good, thanks.”

Chapter Text

PW: hey mcmillin

PW: think u need to come over

PW: like rn

MM: rn?

PW: rn. i’m waiting for u in the hot tub ;)

Mikey sprang up, jumping down from the bunk bed. 

“Gross. You’re off to Pete’s?” Illi looked up from her sketchbook. 

“Shut up! You’re literally doodling Ray right now. You don’t get to make fun of me.” Mikey flipped his sister off as he dug through the dresser looking for his swim trunks. 

“Am not!” She retorted, “Not every boy with curly hair is Ray.”

“Nah, but that one is for sure.” Mikey chuckled, “It’s a good one. Looks a lot like Ray. What’s he doing?”

She slammed her sketchbook shut, “Shut up, Mikey, just go over to your boyfriend’s house.”

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Mikey rolled his eyes, finally finding his shorts. 

“He might as well be, you’re over there every day you’re not at work. Does Pete not work?” She grumbled. 

“No, he’s rich.”

“His parents are rich.” She snorted, “Must be nice. You get to make out in an air conditioned mansion.”

“Oh come on, that’s not a mansion.”

Illi flipped him off, “Just go, Mikey. Will you be home for dinner?”

He flipped her off right back, “Probably. I’ll text you when I’m on my way home.”

~

Mikey opened the door, stepping into the now familiar foyer of Pete’s house. He stepped towards the back of the house, stepping outside to see Pete sitting in the hot tub, reading a book. 

“Hi Mikey~” He spoke in a low voice, smirking, “Come on in. And lose the shirt.”

Mikey was quick to ditch the shirt, stepping into the hot tub, sitting right next to Pete. Before he could speak, Mikey pressed his lips against Pete’s, causing the other boy to let a noise of surprise slip, kissing back as passionately as the other. 

“Did you miss me, Mikey?” Pete smirked against his lips.

“Of course I did.” Mikey muttered into his mouth. 

Pete pulled away, placing his hands on Mikey’s shoulders, moving to straddle his hips, sitting in his lap. He smashed their lips together again, pressing up against the other. Mikey placed his hands on Pete’s waist, keeping them close. 

“Y’like this, McMillin?” Pete spoke as Mikey kissed down his neck. 

“I do…” He murmured against Pete’s tan skin, “I think we might need to move.”

“Move upstairs?” Pete ran a damp hand through Mikey’s hair as he kissed against his sensitive skin. 

“Yeah…” Mikey nipped at the nape of Pete’s neck. 

Pete grabbed Mikey’s face, looking at his fogged up glasses. He removed them carefully, placing them gently at the side of the hot tub. 

“You’re hot without your glasses. I mean, you’re hot with them..” Pete blushed. 

Mikey smirked, “Shut up.”

“Make me.” 

Mikey’s grip on Pete’s waist tightened, “Yep. Let’s move upstairs.” 

~

“Y’know what I’ve been thinking?” Pete spoke as Mikey laid in his arms, and Mikey hummed in response, “This has been really nice.”

Mikey nodded, pressing his lips to Pete’s chest, “It has been.”

Pete stared up at the ceiling, a sigh escaping his lips, “Sometimes I dream about the future.”

“What about it?” 

“I dream about a life where I wake up next to you every morning. I dream of a life where I’m not in an empty house all the time. Like you’re cooking breakfast or something, and I’m watching you from the counter, sipping coffee.”

“Definitely the other way around, I burn everything I cook.” Mikey chuckled, “I’m the one sipping coffee, and you’re definitely shirtless making eggs.”

“I do like being shirtless.” Pete kissed the top of Mikey’s head, “And you love it.”

Mikey buried his face into Pete’s neck, “I do.”

“Anyways, and you and I live together, obviously. And we have a dog. It just sounds so perfect, doesn’t it?”

“It sounds really nice.” Mikey pressed soft kisses to Pete’s neck, “Do you think about that a lot?”

“Yeah. I do.” Pete stretched his neck to allow Mikey more space to kiss, “I think about you all the time. And I think about wanting to show you off.”

Mikey paused, “Huh?”

“Like… the idea of us dating, and me being able to show you off. Like having a picture in my wallet and when people ask I can be like ‘Yeah, that’s my handsome boyfriend.’”

Silence rang between them, and Pete squeezed Mikey’s shoulders, pulling him in close. 

“I- I know you don’t want pictures of us together. But.. but a few wouldn’t hurt.. right?”

Mikey didn’t like to speak when he wasn’t sure what to say, and that killed Pete. Pete was one of those guys who ranted to fill the space, but Mikey waited, hesitating as to not say the wrong thing. 

“I- y’know, I’m sorry. I- I know we’re not dating and I shouldn’t ask that of you.”

Mikey trailed his hand along Pete’s chest, staring off into space, not speaking. 

“Mikey, please. I- I just wanna know. Why.. why won’t you take a picture with me? I want to take pictures. I want to remember this- remember us.”

“We took some pictures together at the party.” Mikey spoke in a monotone voice, “Isn’t that good enough?”

Pete sighed, “I guess… I don’t know. I want more of just us.”

Mikey hummed, laying his head on Pete’s chest, “I just don’t want people to know, y’know? They’re assholes.”

Pete nodded, running his hand through Mikey’s hair, “They are. I guess we’ll just have to wait until things get better.”

~

Over the past year it had become a tradition that the core four group meets up on Wednesday evenings in the McMillin’s basement and watch movies and this had continued on into the summer. Illi really hadn’t expected Frank to show up, especially considering the fight they had had just a few days earlier at Pete’s party, but he did, scraggly as ever. She stared at him through the peep hole and then opened the door to let him in. They said nothing to each other as Frank brushed past and headed down to the basement, greeting Mikey and Mikey only.

“Hi Frankie.” Ray called out from the couch, looking over at him. 

Frank only acknowledged him with a nod. He wordlessly went to his usual spot on the floor in front of the coffee table, sitting down and opening his backpack to pull out a mostly crushed bag of chips.

Illi came down, her arms awkwardly piled with soda cans and set them down on the coffee table as best she could. She wiped the condensation off of her arms and then took her seat, nestled in the corner of the couch where the armrest and the rest of the chair meet.

“I hereby declare the weekly meeting in session,” Mikey said as he sat and leaned back in the armchair, “Same orders as always?” 

The group nodded, Illi and Ray looking over at each other, sharing a look, silently communicating about the tense energy in the room. It wasn’t that they had hoped he wouldn’t come, but they had certainly been surprised when he showed up at the front door today.

Mikey made a quick call to the pizza place and then hung up his phone, turning back to the rest of the group. “So guys, what do we want to watch today?” He asked.

“Kill Bill.” Illi spoke from her spot on the couch, hugging a pillow.

“Any objections?” Mikey asked, and Ray shook his head.

“I don’t wanna watch that.” Frank muttered.

“Well, what do you wanna watch?” Mikey offered, but Frank just mumbled something incomprehensible. “Well, if you don’t have a better idea, we’re gonna watch Kill Bill.”

Frank rolled his eyes, “Sure, side with Illi if you want.”

Mikey stared at him, “Uh? Yeah? She’s my sister.”

“What happened to us, Mikey?” Frank pointed at him, “I thought we were best friends.”

Mikey blinked at him slowly, “Nothing happened to us, Frank, you’re the one who’s acting weird.”

Illi sighed loudly and got up from the couch, inserting the DVD into the player and getting it started. 

~

When Ray left to go pick up the pizza, Illi paused the movie, leaving her, Mikey, and Frank in tense silence. She decided to get up, feigning needing to use the bathroom so she could leave the two alone, hoping that her absence might put Frankie in a better mood. 

She stopped in the kitchen to extend the time away, opening the fridge and staring into it blankly, counting the condiment bottles. Out of the corner of her eye she caught movement as Mikey popped his head into the room.

“Are you okay? Things seem kinda weird between you and Frankie.” He asked, interrupting Illi from her inventory of the fridge.

“I’m fine, Mikey.” She closed the door of the fridge and turned to him. “Frank’s just in a mood.”

“Y’know, I learned that when girls say they’re fine they’re usually not.” Mikey leaned against the doorframe.

She glared at him, “Wow. How observant, Michael James.”

“Woof, I struck a nerve…” Mikey muttered to himself, “Sorry.”

Illi sighed, placing her back against the fridge door, “Frank was out of line at Pete’s party. And I think he’s still annoyed about it.”

“What did he do? Nobody’s telling me.” Mikey frowned, adjusting his glasses, “I feel very out of the loop here.”

“I’ll tell you about it later. Promise.”

The sound of the front door pulled their attention from each other to Ray, who entered the house with a stack of pizzas, his keys jingling between his fingers, “Hi! Did I interrupt a sibling meeting?”

“No.” They spoke in unison, and Illi stepped forward to take the boxes from him. Her cold fingers brushed against Ray’s and he felt his cheeks heat up with a blush. He wished their hands could touch longer, rather than just a fleeting moment over a pizza box.

Ray raised his eyebrows a bit at the immediacy of the siblings response, but quickly brushed it off. “Oh, thanks Illi! Do you want me to grab anything from up here to bring down?” 

Illi initially shrugged but then changed her mind and called out to him as she started to go down the stairs to the basement. “There’s more chips in the cupboard above the microwave, you should have no problem reaching them. Oh, and the bottle of ranch from the fridge, too.” She asked, turning and walking down the stairs before she could hear any response.

Ray did as he was told and grabbed the chips and ranch, but he also tucked the roll of kitchen paper towels under his arm and brought that too.

The four of them huddled around the coffee table eating their slices of pizza off of grease stained paper towels. The room was mostly silent as they ate, which was a little unusual, but Mikey brushed it off as people just being hungry. 

“Mikey,” Frank said, breaking the silence, “can you ask your sister to pass me the chips? She’s eating them all herself.”

“Ask her yourself, dude.” He responded, crinkling his eyebrows at the other boy.

Frank shook his head, crossing his arms. “C’mon Mikey. Seriously.”

Illi sighed loudly, practically throwing the bag of chips at Frank.

“Stop being such a weirdo, Frank. I get it, you’re angry about me not wanting to date you, but that doesn’t mean you get to come to my house and pretend like I don’t exist.” She said, crumpling up her paper towel and standing up. “If it’s so bad for you, fine I’ll leave. But just don’t be a fucking asshole about it. Enjoy movie night, everyone.”

Illi quickly climbed up the stairs from the basement and went to her bedroom, closing the door firmly behind her.

~

Illi stared up at the bottom of Mikey’s top bunk for what felt like an eternity until there was a knock on the door and Mikey came in.

“Can you please explain what that was about? Why was Frank trying to use me as a messenger?” He asked, shutting the door softly behind him and sitting down on the end of Illi’s bed.

“Frank got really drunk at Pete’s party and kissed me on the cheek without asking. When I pushed him away and told him that I’m not interested and that he’s like an extra brother to me he got really upset and started yelling at me because of it. I think he’s jealous of me and Ray even though we’re just friends.” She took a deep breath, “Anyway, that’s why he hasn’t been talking to me since.”

“Yeesh.” Mikey said simply. “Will you come back downstairs? Me and Ray miss you. And probably Frank too.”

“I guess.” She got up, ruffling her brother’s hair on the way past and out the door. 

~

They finished the movie without many more issues and eventually Ray and Frank had to go home. Although that tense silence still made the air heavy, and Illi wanted nothing more than to leave the suffocating room. 

Illi could almost swear she heard Frank mutter a “sorry” as he left, tossing down his skateboard the second he made it off their beat up walkway and riding off down the street to his house.

“Hey, Illi, talk to me outside for a second?” Ray asked as he shrugged on his leather jacket. 

She nodded wordlessly, and they both stepped out to the front porch. She felt herself relaxing a bit in the fresh summer air. Even though it was hot, it was so much better than in the basement. 

“That… That was rough.” Ray chuckled softly. 

“It was… I don’t understand how this is all my fault.” Illi frowned, and Ray placed his hand on her shoulder. 

“It’s not your fault, Ills, it’s all him. He’s the one acting weird. He’s the one who blew up at you.” Ray sighed, squeezing her shoulder comfortingly, “I was hoping he would come talk to me… but nothing.”

Illi nodded, “I guess he’s mad at you too. It’s so stupid. I wish Frankie never liked me. Romantic feelings just make everything so complicated.”

Ray’s cheeks flushed pink, “Yeah. I think I know what you mean.”

Ray held her gaze for longer than he usually did, taking in her features in the fading daylight as the sun had already set, darkness enveloping the town, streetlights flickering. Her hazel eyes were watery with tears threatening to fall, and he cursed Frank internally for messing everything up. 

He let go of Illi, opening his arms up for her. She gladly accepted the hug, happy to be enveloped in Ray’s warmth. His strong arms held her tightly as he leaned his head against hers. 

“Take care, Illi.” He spoke softly as they pulled away, “Text me whenever.”

“I will.” Illi smiled, “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Illi. Say bye to Mikey for me too, please.” He grinned, turning around to find his beat-up Honda Civic parked on the street.

Chapter Text

The more Mikey came over, the more Pete wanted. He was craving that love he was so desperate for, one that he felt like he deserved. He was head over heels for Mikey, more than just a crush. He wanted to be with him more than just under the sheets. 

“McMillin?” He squeezed the other boy’s hand as they laid in his bed, limbs tangled in the blankets. 

“Yeah?” Mikey looked up, his hazel eyes sparkling from behind his glasses. 

Pete bit his lip, “I- I have a question for you. And you might not like it.”

Mikey looked away, “Oh.”

“Is.. is there a possibility of you being my boyfriend?” Pete’s voice shook slightly, “Or am I just…”

“Just what?” Mikey’s voice was firm. 

‘Just waiting for nothing. For disappointment. For heartbreak.’

“I want to be more than a hookup to you, Mikey. I want us to be together.” He finally spat out, “Fuck, McMillin. You won’t let me take any pictures of us. You won’t let me take you on a date. You sure as hell won’t hold my hand in public. Is.. Is that so much to ask?”

Mikey let go of Pete’s hand, curling in on himself, and Pete continued. 

“Fuck, I like you. I like you a whole lot. I- I don’t know what to say to make you feel the same. I hope you do. Fuck- tell me you feel the same, Mikey.”

Mikey felt his heart racing in his chest, “I like you too, Pete. I’m just scared.”

“Scared of what?” Pete spoke up at the ceiling, “Are you scared of dating a man, or are you scared of me?”

Mikey felt tears prick his eyes, “I’m just scared, Pete. God. It’s not always about you.”

“It is about me if it’s us, Mikey. You’re scared of something and you aren’t telling me what. You can trust me, I’ll take your secrets to my grave. I just want you to be honest with me.” Pete sighed, looking down at Mikey, “I- I want you to trust me. I want to be the person you come home to and tell everything to. No matter what.”

Mikey sat up, suddenly, ripping himself from Pete’s warmth. He started looking for his shirt. 

“Are you seriously gonna leave, Mikey? Again?” Pete’s tone was wobbly, “You’re just gonna run away when conversations get tough?”

Mikey didn’t speak, he just pulled his shirt on, standing up. Pete reached out, grabbing his arm, getting up to his feet. 

“Don’t leave, Mikey, we can figure this out-“

“Let me go, Pete.” Mikey glared at him. 

“I’m not letting you go again, Mikey. I can’t.”

“Pete.”

“Fuck, Mikey, I love you. I love you and I want to make this work. Why are you making this so difficult?!”

Mikey gasped quietly, watching Pete’s warm brown eyes well with tears. He hadn’t been expecting that from Pete. 

“I can’t be with you Pete, I’m sorry.” Mikey breathed, “It’s just not gonna work out.”

“So you’re just gonna let me spill my guts?! And leave me here?!” Pete’s voice was raising in volume, “Fuck, Mikey, please don’t leave me. I’ll get on my knees. I’ll do anything.”

Mikey took a step back, watching as Pete reached out to him again, tears streaming down his face, “I’m sorry, Pete.”

“Do you love me, Mikey?” Pete’s voice cracked, “Just lie to me. Tell me you do.”

Mikey’s silence spoke volumes as he put his hand on the door handle, looking back at Pete. He was wiping tears from his eyes, shirtless, hair messy from their previous make out session not 20 minutes earlier. He looked pathetic, and felt like it too. Mikey felt his stomach flipping, everything in his body telling him to run away. 

“Mikey. Please don’t leave. Let me fix this.”

“I don’t think I can stay.” Mikey finally broke his silence. 

“Then go.” Pete‘s voice broke, “Then leave me. Leave this all behind.”

Finally giving into his instincts, Mikey flung the door open, heading down the stairs and out of the house, barely having his shoes on before he paced down the sidewalks, starting the long trek back home. 

Mikey knew he fucked up, but he didn’t know what else to do. Trapped like an animal in a cage, cornered and scared, he only had one response: flight.

~ 

Pete felt more alone than he had ever felt when Mikey left. After sobbing for what felt like hours, he dragged himself off of his bedroom floor, forcing himself to the bathroom to shower, taking along a pair of pyjama pants. No sense in trying to do anything else with his fucked up day. 

Once he was in the warm, bordering on hot, shower, he found himself sobbing again. He let him go- he shouldn’t have. He should’ve fought harder. 

Once he was back in his room, his eyes and his chest hurt from crying, so he had to do what he knew best- write about it. He typed the entry through tears, not caring if it made any sense:

‘lately i’ve been into believing fictional stories like the ones about me and you being happy. they’ve gotta be science fiction cause how else can you have a monster fall in love with a boy with no heart? actually i’m pretty sure you have a heart, but i’m just as certain it’ll never be mine. i can tell you’re willing to be loved somewhere on the inside but that doesn’t do me any good when i’m still seeing things through thick curtains over windows and padlocked doors on the outside…’

~

Patrick knew something had happened between Pete and Mikey because suddenly Pete had completely isolated himself. Him and Pete were close, and he expected his eccentric friend to at least shoot him a text daily. But over 2 days of radio silence plus that doozy of a livejournal entry? Patrick knew he had to visit Pete. 

And so he stood at Pete’s door, bag of cookies in hand, ringing the doorbell, but got no response. 

Patrick called him, and that’s what finally got a response, “Pete. I’m at your front door.”

“Hey Trick, I- I know you are. I just- I don’t wanna see anyone right now. I’m sick.”

“I brought cookies. My mom helped me so you know they’re good. We can watch whatever movie you wanna watch, I’ll sit through anything. I just don’t want you to be by yourself, Pete.”

Pete knew he couldn’t lie to Patrick, even if he wanted to. He hung up the phone, forcing himself out of bed to trudge down to the front door, opening it and staring at Patrick. 

Pete looked like shit, and both of them knew it. Patrick stepped in, placed the bag of cookies down on the dresser next to the door, and flung his arms around the other boy. 

“Wow, Trick, miss me that much?” Pete attempted a joke, but was secretly incredibly grateful for Patrick’s arrival. 

Patrick let go, giving Pete a faint smile, “I just had to come visit you. Radio silence is weird, even for you.”

Pete hadn’t even realized he hadn’t texted Patrick at all. Time hadn’t seemed real since it happened. 

Patrick slipped his shoes off, walking confidently into Pete’s living room, like he had lived there all of his life. Pete trailed behind, and was instructed to find a movie. He did as he was told, inserting the Dirty Dancing VHS into the player, and Patrick came back into the living room with a tray of cookies, two glasses of milk, and a blanket. He wrapped him and Pete up, because despite it being summer, Pete’s house was always cold, and Pete finally felt himself relax for the first time since it happened. 

It didn’t take long for Pete to open up, he could never resist Patrick’s big, watery, curious eyes, “Mikey and I broke up.”

“I’m sorry, Pete.” Patrick felt as Pete laid his head on the other’s shoulder. 

“It- it fucking sucks. I don’t know what I did wrong.” Pete’s voice cracked, “I loved him, Trick, I really thought that was going somewhere.”

Pete, ever the romantic, had gone through many breakups before this. But something about this felt different than the others, and Patrick sensed it. Him and Pete had known each other since middle school, he knew Pete’s moods and how they flickered, but this was entirely new. 

Patrick held Pete close as he continued, “And he just.. left. It was cold, it was heartless… Did.. did he ever even like me??”

“I’m sure he did like you, Pete, he was here all the time.” Patrick tried not to let the hint of jealousy he felt peek through his words. 

“Or was he just using me??? Was I just an experiment to him?” Pete’s voice was wobbling again, “Fuck, I’m sorry Trick, I’m gonna cry all over your shirt.”

“It’s okay, Pete, you can cry all over me. I don’t care- I mean- I care about you, I don’t care about my shirt.” He stumbled over his words, “Mikey sounds like he sucks.”

“He didn’t! I don’t know what happened.” Pete countered, “But I know I fucked up too. I told I loved him. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“But you didn’t fuck up, you were just being honest.” Patrick ran a hand through Pete’s messy hair, "Don't beat yourself up about being honest.”

“I shouldn’t have, Trick, I should’ve kept things cool.”

“You’re not a ‘keeping things cool’ kinda guy, Pete, and that’s what I like about you. You feel things as fully as possible. I wish I was like that.” Patrick kept his eyes trained on the movie, “You’re so authentically yourself.”

Pete nuzzled into Patrick’s neck, wrapping his arms around the other boy, “I love you, Trick.”

“I love you too, Pete.” 

~

Unlike Mikey, Patrick was more than happy to stay the night at Pete’s place, and Pete was very appreciative of the company. But of course, Patrick eventually had to go volunteer at one of the local music venues concession stand, so Pete found himself alone yet again. 

A text, however, totally rocked Pete’s world as he stared down at it. It was from Mikey. 

MM: Hey

MM: We still cool?

Pete nearly chucked his phone out the window. “We still cool?!” He yelled out into the empty hallway. “Are you fucking kidding me?!”

He hadn’t honestly been expecting Mikey to answer. He had texted him a few times since their breakup, trying his best to recover what they had. He really didn’t want them to be over, he was head over heels for Mikey. He typed out a few responses, deleting them before he sent them, cursing aloud to the posters on his bedroom walls. 

PW: help

PW: help me right now

PW: i just broke up with someone and they texted asking if we’re cool

PW: joe

PW: joe

PW: what do i do

PW: joe

PW: please

Pete texted Joe in a series of panicked messages.

JT: fucked up man. u wanna come over? andy’s here

Pete ran down the stairs, nearly tripping as he grabbed his skateboard. As he skated down the streets, he didn’t even listen to music. His mind was racing with thoughts of Mikey and what had happened, and how the hell he was gonna respond to that vague text.

He knocked on Joe’s door, brushing his sweaty palms against his jeans, anxiously awaiting Joe to open the door. As soon as he did, Pete flew into the house, running down to the basement where Andy was sat, gamecube controller in hand.

“Guys! I fucked up!” Pete held out his phone to show the text to Andy, who took it to examine it closer.

“Is… Is that Mikey?” Andy raised a brow, “Seriously? We thought this was a hot girl.”

“It’s Mikey McMillin?!” Joe groaned from the doorway, “Seriously? You’re losing it over that nerd?”

Pete whipped around to point at Joe, “You’re one to talk! You don’t understand- Mikey and I had something special.”

“I can see that by the way you’re freaking out on me.” Joe retorted, “Come now, tell us everything.”

“Actually, I don’t know if I wanna know.” Andy sighed, handing the phone back to Pete.

“Okay well maybe don’t tell us everything everything. But hit the main points.” Joe sat down on the couch next to Andy, crossing his arms as he looked up at Pete.

“So, basically, we kissed on the band trip. And then after the band trip I invited him over and we kissed again. And then at the fourth of July party we- uh- we did more than that. And we kept doing that, he was coming over almost every day. And then I asked to be exclusive, and he freaked out on me. And then maybe I accidentally confessed my love and we had a really big fight and he left me.” Pete was out of breath by the time he finished his explanation, looking to Joe and Andy for a reaction.

“So that’s why we couldn’t find you at the party.” Andy mused, “It’s all making sense.”

“The McMillins are really causing some drama, huh?” Joe chuckled, “First Illi and Frank, now you and Mikey…”

“Wait, what happened between Illi and Frank?” Pete raised his brows.

“Oh, dude, huge fight.” Joe leaned back into the couch, “Like, drunk Frank screaming about ‘why couldn’t it’ve been me!’ and shit like that… I think he even kissed Illi. I kinda caught the tail end of it, and then Frank ran out and Ray chased after him.”

Pete exhaled deeply, “That’s… not good.”

“Oh, and Illi disappeared for a while.” Andy added in.

“We don’t know where she went but she eventually reappeared just in time for you and Mikey to show your faces again.” Joe rolled his eyes, “Now I know that was a hickey! Andy, you owe me 5 bucks.”

Andy grumbled, reaching into his bag to fish out a crumpled $5 bill out of his wallet, “Fine. I’m a man of my word.”

“Oh come on. You bet on it? Fuckin’ losers.” Pete scoffed.

“You’re the one who ran to us! Where’s Patrick?” Joe exclaimed.

“He’s at work, and he’s been listening to me for the past day. I didn’t want to bother him again.” Pete put his head in his hands as he spoke, further messing up his already messy hair.

“So, what? You’re gonna come bother us now?” Joe snorted.

“You asked me to come over! So are you gonna help me or what?” Pete whined, looking down at his phone, “He said ‘Hey. We still cool?’ and we are definitely not cool… So what do I say?”

“Tell him to fuck off and he broke your heart. There. Problem solved.” Joe suggested.

“Or just don’t respond to him. Easy.” Andy chimed in.

“I can’t just not respond, this is the first time he’s texted back.” Pete sighed.

“How often have you been texting him?” Andy asked timidly.

“Uh. A little bit.” Pete lied.

“Knowing you, you’ve been spamming him and probably also spamming your blog.” Joe chuckled.

Pete went red. He was caught.

“I say don’t respond. Don’t give him the satisfaction of getting to you.” Andy nodded, “Hopefully this’ll all blow over by September. I don’t particularly want to deal with an even pissier Mikey McMillin in my section.”

“I don’t know if it will…” Pete grumbled, finally plopping himself down on the couch, “Whatcha guys playing?”

“Melee.” Andy offered his controller to Pete, but he turned it away.

“Nah, I’ll just watch you guys play.” Pete offered a small smile, “Better than being home alone.”

Pete found himself drifting off to sleep as he watched his friends fight each other in the game, listening to them trash talking each other and laughing. 

~

When Patrick got off shift, he saw he had a text from Pete. 

PW: call me when ur off shift plz

Patrick hurriedly called Pete’s number, worry filling his stomach as he walked towards the bus stop. 

“Hello?”

“Pete! Are you okay?” Patrick let his worry seep through his voice. 

“Trick! I’m okay- I’m- I’m just. Mikey texted me. And I can’t stop overthinking it.”

“I can be there in like… 30 minutes?” Patrick looked down at his watch, then up at the bus schedule, “Ugh. Might be more like 40. I’m sorry, Pete, is there anything I can do now?”

“Tell me about work?” Pete sounded like he had flopped down on his bed. 

“Really?” Patrick chuckled, “My boring day?”

“I just need to hear your voice, Trick, don’t.. don’t make it a big deal.” Pete scoffed, “How was the show?”

“The show was great, from what I could hear from the concession stand.” Patrick chuckled, sitting down at the bus stop bench, “What did you do today?”

“I stopped by Joe’s. Him and Andy were playing Melee.”

“Aw man, I need to play melee again. Will you play with me, Pete?”

“Nah, man, you’re gonna hand my ass to me.” Pete’s laugh made Patrick smile. 

“Maybe Mario Party, then? Or Double Dash?” Patrick suggested as he watched a couple walk by holding hands. 

He frowned- He wished that was him. But Patrick couldn’t get a girl to give him the time of day, let alone get one to date him. He debated asking Illi out, but based on the fight he witnessed at Pete’s party… plus the whole Mikey and Pete thing.. it was best not to engage with her, or any McMillin for that matter. 

“I can definitely whoop your ass in Double Dash.” Pete teased Patrick through the phone. 

“You absolutely cannot!” Patrick laughed, “You say that every time, and every time I whoop your ass!”

Pete’s giggles were so infectious as Patrick sat alone at the bus stop, giggling back into his phone. They continued to chat until Patrick got on the bus, and he promised Pete he would be there as soon as possible to spend the night. Just for Pete.

Chapter Text

‘The music in here sucks.’ Illi thought to herself as she took another book from her cart, sliding it onto the shelf in its place, ‘If only I was allowed to listen to my own music. I bet Ray gets to listen to whatever he wants at the record store.’

“Uh- excuse me, Miss? Do you think you could help me find something?” 

She turned quickly at the familiar voice, grinning as her suspicions were confirmed.

“Hi Ray.” She tilted her head at him, “What are you doing here?”

“I was looking for a new book to read.” He placed his hand on his chin, trying to hide a smile, “And I thought, what better place to go than the local book store?”

“You’re such a dork.” She chuckled softly, “Are you looking for anything in particular, sir?” 

Her tone was playful, tucking a piece of recently washed dark hair behind her ear. He noticed because it was fluffier than usual. He had always wondered what it would feel like if he ran his hands through it, but never dared to ask. 

“I was looking for something, but I can’t remember what it’s called. I think it had a movie made about it…” Ray thought aloud as he pretended not to remember the book he was looking for, tapping his finger against his chin with a grin.

“That could be almost anything, Toro, you’ve gotta give me something else.” She gestured vaguely to the shelves of books around them, “Do you have a genre??”

“It’s an old book, that’s for sure. Like the kind that they make us read in English class.” He suggested. In all honesty, Ray knew exactly which book he was looking for and was just acting like he couldn’t remember to spend more time with Illi.

She led him swiftly to the classics section, and started listing off book titles as she thumbed through them, “Great Gatsby? Fahrenheit 451? Pride and Prejudice?”

“Nope, nope, and nope.” He grinned as she sighed in exasperation. 

“Okay. Do you have, like, a theme? Anything that’s particularly memorable about this book? Give me some help here, Toro.”

He laughed, “It seems like something you’d be into.”

She groaned, “I’m into a lot of things!”

“Start picking out your favourites.” He suggested, leaning against one of the shelves.

She gave him a small shove and then started looking through the titles, running her finger along the spines of the books as she looked for one, sliding it out when she found it. “Animal Farm?”

Ray simply shook his head, sending his curls bouncing.

Illi was quick to reshelve the book before pulling another one off the shelf, “Lord of the Flies?”

“I liked that one, but no.” He smiled, “Keep going.”

“The Picture of Dorian Gray?” She slid the book out, and his brows raised.

“You’re getting warmer.” He said and then paused, “I feel like you’re missing one of your favourite things here, Illi.”

She paused, slowly slipping the novel back onto the shelf, muttering to herself, “My favourite things…”

Illi slid her finger along the spines of the books again until she eventually stopped, exclaiming, “Oh! I don’t know how I missed this before.” She pulled a copy of Dracula off the shelf and passed it to Ray.

“Please tell me that’s what you want.” She groaned, but quickly broke into a grin.

“That’s exactly it!” Ray beamed, “I knew you’d get it.”

Illi stared him directly in the eyes, “You weren’t actually confused, were you?”

Ray laughed, “What? No, me? How much longer do you have in your shift?”

She glanced down at her watch and was a bit surprised to see how quickly the time had passed. “15 more minutes.”

“Would you want to grab something from the food court with me after?”

Illi smiled, feeling her cheeks go a bit warm, “Yeah. That would be great.”

“Cool.” Ray said and held up the copy of Dracula that she had helped him find, “I’m going to go buy this and then I’ll meet you just outside the store?”

“Sounds like a plan. I’ll see you shortly, Toro.”

She watched as he stepped towards the counter and out of her sights. She sighed in content, starting to walk back towards her abandoned cart when she almost ran straight into her brother.

“You two are disgusting.” He poked her shoulder, his head tilted down so he could stare at her from above his glasses.

“You’re one to talk. I literally watched you flirt with some chick over by the CDs for, like, 30 minutes.” She rolled her eyes, “Besides, that wasn’t even flirting. That was just Ray being playful.”

Mikey gave her a slight shove and pulled a small piece of note paper from the shirt pocket of his uniform. “It wasn’t just flirting - I totally scored. And you can keep telling yourself that all you want about Ray, but I saw he had big cartoonish heart eyes when you two were talking about your stupid nerd book.”

“Dracula is a classic!” She scoffed, shoving Mikey back, “It’s not a stupid nerd book. You’re a nerd too! That’s nerd-on-nerd violence, Michael James.”

He discreetly raised his middle finger at her before noticing that someone had messed with the CD display again. “Ugh, that’s like the third time I’ve had to fix that today and I’m not even halfway through my shift.” He groaned, shuffling his feet a bit as he made his way back to his section.

She chuckled to herself as she finally made her way back to her cart. She shelved as many books as she could before her shift was done, rolling the cart to the back to be someone else’s problem later today. She punched out, stepping into the employee locker room to change before meeting Ray outside. 

Ray had found a seat on a bench outside and was currently squished between a grandma, and a very stressed looking mother who was rolling a stroller back and forth next to him to try and calm the crying baby inside. He was quick to get up and practically ran over to Illi when he spotted her.

She was dressed in a long, dark purple skirt that flowed down to her mid-calf, paired with a pair of beat up combat boots. Her mismatched socks peeked out from the boots, complimented by the metal heart belt that was loosely draped around her waist. She had layered a black tank top and a black mesh top that hung just over the shoulders. Of course, she brought it all together with her signature messenger bag. 

“Sorry that took me so long, Mikey distracted me before I could leave.” She smiled at him, “What do you think of the outfit?”

“I think it’s- I mean- I think you’re beautiful as always.” Ray smiled, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, hoping his hair would cover his rapidly blushing face.

She leaned into him as they walked, “You always know how to make a girl feel special, Toro.”

They eventually made their way to the food court, Illi rambling on about stories from work: about the girl Mikey was flirting with, the old man who was flirting with the cashier, the young girls that bought a ton of books from The Boyfriend Club series… There was never a dull day in retail, especially at a bookstore.

He loved watching her ramble about whatever came to her mind. He liked to observe the way her hazel eyes lit up when she got passionate, and the way her hands moved around to emphasize her points, and how she gave each character in her story a silly voice.

He was so head over heels for Illi McMillin, and he guessed by the glares he was receiving from Mikey, and the blow-up from Frank, that his little crush was becoming more obvious than years previous. He was fine with that, he didn’t care what they thought, he just hoped Illi felt the same way. Obviously he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, he was aware she was receiving a lot of unwanted attention, but Illi always made time for him, and somehow, that meant he was doing the right thing. 

~

“I can’t believe you dragged me out to the mall to go gift shopping.” Pete groaned, “Buying a gift for Joe is easy - just get him beer!”

“I want to get him something thoughtful, Pete! Buying him something just because isn’t the same.” Patrick replied, “And we aren’t even able to get beer anyway.”

“I have my sources.” Pete chuckled, “So, where to first, Trick?”

“Let’s stop by the record shop.” Patrick grabbed Pete’s arm, dragging him down the crowded halls of the mall.

As they entered, Patrick looked to see if Ray was working the counter, which he was not. He breathed a sigh of relief, thankful to not have to interact with any member of the McMillin group. Even though Ray was nothing but nice to them, he still didn’t really want to engage. 

Pete travelled down to the CDs while Patrick checked the vinyls, thumbing through the metal section, seeing if anything particularly struck him as Joe Trohman. 

”It’s looking pretty bleak here,” Patrick called over to Pete, “Any luck with the CDs?”

“Eh, nothing he doesn’t already have.” Pete shrugged.

“Curse a guy with a big collection.” Patrick chuckled. 

“Wait. I struck gold.” Pete held up a CD, “It’s an album called Locust Abortion Technician by a band called The Butthole Surfers.”

”There’s no fucking way that’s what it’s called-“ Patrick said, rushing across the shop to look at the CD Pete was holding. “Oh my god.”

“I think this is gonna be my gift to Joe.” Pete held up the CD with pride, marching over to the counter to pay.

‘Still leaves me empty handed…’ Patrick thought to himself, ‘Guess we’ll keep going.’

Satisfied with his purchase, Pete walked with a bit more of a bounce in his step as he followed Patrick around the mall. 

“Bookstore next, I need to at least get a card and maybe a book or something…” Patrick spoke as they made their way to the familiar store.

“You think Joe reads?” Pete pushed Patrick’s shoulder playfully.

“Of course he reads!” Patrick retorted, “The only person who doesn’t read is you.”

“Ouch, Trick.” Pete chuckled, “You’re so mean to me.”

“Oh shut up.” Patrick’s cheeks went pink, “You make it sound like I bully you.”

“Spousal abuse is an ugly thing, Trick.” Pete sighed dramatically, “I will stand your verbal abuse no longer.”

“Oh my god, you’re such a drama queen.” Patrick groaned, cheeks bright red. 

The pair entered the bookstore and after a quick pause at the front display table, Patrick made a b-line to the card section. He flicked through the options, opening each one to see what the message inside said. There were lots of good options, and he found himself struggling to decide between a really nice sappy card about how nice it was to be friends and a funny card with some old people in bikinis and speedos drinking beer on it.

Meanwhile, Pete wandered his way from the horror books to the CD section, where he was met with an all too familiar face. Mikey McMillin, his ex-lover turned mortal enemy, was standing between the bins of CDs, dressed in uniform, talking with a girl around their age. He was smirking, his hazel eyes staring directly into hers with that sparkle that Pete knew used to be reserved for him. His heart dropped to the floor as Mikey looked up and made eye contact with him, and the other boy gave a half-hearted wave. 

“Hey, Pete.” Mikey’s voice filled Pete’s ears, causing every thought in his head to spin around like tub draining water, all coherent thoughts and actions swirling down the drain.

Pete turned suddenly and sprinted down to the card aisle, grabbing Patrick aggressively by the shoulder.

“Trick!! We’ve gotta go!” Pete whisper-yelled, “We have to go now!!”

“But I’m just trying to decide which card to get-“ He started, holding both options up to show his friend.

“Just pick one! We’ve gotta go!” Pete grabbed his arm, dragging him towards the entrance.

“No! Pete, just tell me what’s going on.” Patrick dug his heels in, stopping Pete from moving him.

“Mikey’s here! And he’s flirting with a girl!” Pete hissed, “And he said hi to me and now we need to exit immediately.”

“Okay! Okay!” Patrick chuckled, “Pick a card and we can go.”

“The- the fuckin’ old people card! I don’t care!” Pete exclaimed, “I’ll meet you outside.”

“I was thinking that too.” Patrick sighed, mostly to himself, “I’ll write a heartfelt message on the inside. It’ll be perfect. I’ll meet you outside, Pete.”

Pete dashed out of the store and into the crowds outside. He leaned against a pillar, watching the front of the bookstore like a hawk as he waited for his best friend. Once Patrick stepped out of the store, Pete glued himself to his side as Patrick led them out of the mall and into the warm summer air.

“How’re you feeling, Pete?” Patrick asked, looking over at his friend.

“I feel like shit.” Pete sighed, looking back at Patrick, “I’m really glad you’re here, though.”

~

As August started to reach its end, it was time for the McMillin siblings to get some new clothes and have a bit of a wardrobe refresh. The pair had chosen to come to the thrift store so that the small amount of money they had each saved up from their minimum wage jobs at the bookstore would spread farther. Sure, it was a little bit embarrassing to be doing back to school shopping at the thrift store, but it provided lots of options for new to them clothing.

Illi had to practically drag Mikey back to the rack of dresses along the back of the thrift store. He hovered behind her shoulder awkwardly as she shifted through each hanger on the rack, the metal hooks scraping across the rod with the sound of metal on metal. 

Some of the things on the rack were instant skips - the dresses with lots of frills and ruffles, in bright purples and pinks - but there was one that stuck out, which Illi pulled out and passed to her brother. Mikey had long resigned himself to his role as the item holder and took it without a comment. His arms were full of clothes like a glorified coatrack. They were mostly Illi’s choices, with only a couple shirts and a few jackets of his own in the pile, but he didn’t mind.

Mikey stared down at the dress that his sister had picked out and commented softly, “That one seems nice.”

”That’s why I picked it, dummy. I think I’m going to try it on.” Illi replied, turning to glance over her shoulder at him as she continued to look through the other dress options that they had.

A few minutes later, Illi turned to her brother and reached to take some items from his arms. “I think I’m done looking, but I want to try some of this stuff on.” She said as she walked towards the small area dedicated to changing rooms. Luckily one of the rooms was open, if you could even technically call it a room. It was more like a closet with a mirror inside, big enough to fit only one person, with a curtain door that stopped at about ankle height.

Illi dropped her pile of clothes onto the floor of her dressing room, coming back out briefly to check through what was left with Mikey to see if there was anything she was missing before she started trying things on. She quickly went back in, tugging the curtain closed behind her.

She picked up the dress and stared down at it, running her fingers over the soft velvet of the bodice, interrupted occasionally by the bumps of sequins that were scattered across the top like stars. She couldn’t explain why, but going out and trying on a dress like this at a store felt so much different than when she had borrowed them from her mom’s closet. After a few deep breaths, Illi pulled the dress over her head.

She turned to the mirror and finally looked at herself. The stretchy black velvet of the bodice clung to her body but not in a way that felt uncomfortable and like it emphasized the things she didn’t want to notice. The skirt hung in a straight up and down column style, made of a sparkly black chiffon, reaching down to the tops of her feet. Illi was quiet as she turned back and forth in the mirror, trying to see every angle she could.

”Mikey,” She called softly, “You still out there?”

“Yup.” He responded simply.

”I’m going to show you something, can you help me decide?” Illi knew that it was risky asking him to assess what looked good, as he was a bit notorious for his questionable fashion choices, but if there was anyone who was going to be dead honest with her it would be Mikey.

”Please be honest,” She said as she slid the curtain back and stepped out into the main area.

Mikey was silent for a moment, taking in the garment, looking up at his sister, “It’s very pretty.”

“Y’think?” She twirled, watching the fabric of the skirt, “Does it seem like me?”

He nodded, “Looks like you’re gonna go on a date.”

”Shut up about the date stuff! You never know when you’ll need a nice dress, and I have prom this year so maybe I’ll save it for that.” She said, but the way her cheeks flushed red gave her away a bit. She hoped that maybe she’d have a chance to wear something nice like this on a date, but knew that probably wouldn’t be anytime soon.

Chapter Text

As September rolled around, the days got a bit shorter, and the McMillin siblings were filled with dread, but for entirely different reasons. 

Illi was dreading the beginning of her senior year. She knew this was considered an important year, and of course, she added more to her workload by auditioning and getting into youth orchestra. There goes her Saturday mornings… But she knew she’d be okay, because she had her best friend Ray. Her… best friend… that she had a massive crush on. 

Mikey was dreading the idea of being trapped in a room with Pete again. He only saw Pete once since the breakup, one time at work, and of course, it almost cost him that cute chick’s number. But Mikey’s whole day was ruined after seeing Pete, especially so briefly, and Pete looked so hurt. Mikey felt incredibly bad for how things ended, and wanted nothing more than to attempt to make friends with him again. 

As the McMillin siblings walked into band, Illi with bassoon in hand, she breathed a sigh of relief. Band was her safe space amongst the chaos. 

“Ray!” She called out, and Ray turned around to give her a big smile.

“Hi Illi! How are you?” He stood from his chair, pulling her into a big hug. 

“I’m good, I’m excited to be back in band.” She giggled a bit as he lifted her up as he hugged her tight. 

“Me too. Are you excited for youth orchestra?” He held onto her arms as he let her go, “I’m so excited for you.”

“I’m a mix of excited and nervous.” She spoke a bit softer, looking down at Ray’s chest, where his clean blazer sat atop his always ironed shirt and tie.  

“You’re gonna do so well, but I understand being nervous.” He turned to grab a chair for her to sit next to him. 

She did, comforted by Ray’s warm presence as they sat, chatting about whatever came to mind. 

Meanwhile, Mikey and Pete were having a stare down. Mikey had made his way to the percussion section in the back, as he usually did, grabbing a chair so he could sit behind the percussion cabinet. 

As he looked up, he made direct eye contact with Pete, who was almost unashamedly staring right at him. Mikey gave him a small wave, and Pete turned quickly back to Patrick, whispering something in his ear. Mikey hated that. He understood him and Pete weren’t on good terms, but he missed his buddy Pete. 

“How was your summer, Mikey?” Andy spoke in his usual soft tone. 

“It was.. good. I guess.” Mikey turned to Andy, trying to read the expression on his face. Did he know? Did Pete tell all of his friends?

“Good, I’m glad to hear it. What kinda pieces do you think we’ll get this year?” He asked, trying to get some conversation going. If Andy knew, he was making sure Mikey didn’t. 

“I don’t know. Hopefully something good.”

Andy nodded, “What’s good to you?”

It was a strangely pointed question, and Andy stared back at him through his thin glasses. Mikey thought about how they had really similar glasses now that he was actually making eye contact with Andy.  

“I like the Smashing Pumpkins.” Mikey blurted out. 

“Cool. I’ve heard their stuff. They’re cool.” Andy nodded, “I’m more into metal myself.”

“Really? But you’re so good-” Mikey gestured around them, “-at band stuff.”

“What can I say? I’m multi-talented.” He teased, pulling up a chair to sit next to Mikey. 

Down in the trombone section, Frank had wandered in almost late, instinctively pulling a chair to the trombone section, and found himself sitting alone. Everyone had sat with their friends and not in their sections. 

“I’ll sit with you, loser.” Joe pulled up a chair next to him. 

“Hey, Joe.” Frank nodded at him, “Happy birthday, I think?”

“It was yesterday, but much appreciated.” Joe chuckled, “How was your summer?”

“Eh. Pretty good.” Frank shrugged, “Yours?”

“Yeah, pretty good. Same old same old.” Joe chuckled, “Played video games and hung around with friends. That’s- like- the dream.”

“Something like that.” Frank let out a small smile. 

Joe looked like he wanted to ask something else, but hesitated, keeping his mouth shut. 

“Have you ever played guitar?” Frank asked, surprising both him and Joe. 

“Uh, yeah, sometimes. Why?” Joe tilted his head at Frank. 

“I was just thinking of playing more guitar… maybe making a band?”

“That would be fun. We already have a drummer too.”

“Andy?” Frank raised a brow. 

“Yeah. He’s actually a drummer in a metal band right now.”

“Whoa, seriously?” Frank looked back at Andy, whose appearance gave that of a bookworm, “Him??”

“Oh yeah. Wicked drummer. Like you wouldn’t believe the sounds that guy makes.” Joe nodded. 

“Huh. I had no idea.” Frank turned back to Joe. 

“Anyways, what’re your favourite bands?” Joe asked, unintentionally releasing Pandora’s box as Frank proceeded to yap his ear off about bands he liked until Mr. Maven called everyone’s attention to the front. 

“Hi senior band, welcome back to school!” He grinned, “We have some new, but familiar, faces as we have some Grade 9s who became Grade 10s.”

Illi turned back to point at Frank, who rolled his eyes and flipped her off.

“Anyways, I have new music for you up here at the front. Your seating chart is here on the whiteboard-“ He moved to the side to show the chart, “-and your part assignment is over here on the cabinet.”

He turned to Patrick specifically, “Stump, I sorta just put you where I needed you. Are you cool with that?”

“I’m so cool with that!” Patrick called back, "Wherever you need me, Mr. Maven.”

“Cool. If you need a folder, I’ve got a stack of paper ones from the local music store. Go forth, friends, get your parts, then we’ll talk about the syllabus.”

The band all lurched towards the stacks of paper, chaos erupting among the students as they chatted loudly about their summers and what repertoire they were playing, how easy or hard the parts were, all anything in between. 

Illi filled her professional hard cover black folder with bassoon music, taking her seat next to Ray as he collected his assortment of clarinet parts.

“Looks like I’m mostly bass clarinet this time.” Ray spoke as he sat down, “I’m fine with that.” 

“Bass clarinet is cool. Only cool people play bass instruments.” She puffed up her chest, “Right??”

“Of course!” Ray chuckled, “And we get to sit next to each other.”

“We get to sit next to each other and be the coolest, most important members of the band. It couldn’t get much better than that.” Illi grinned back at him, looking over at his parts.

“We get to sit next to each other in youth orchestra too.” Ray reminded her, “So you don’t have to be nervous for that.”

She sighed in relief, “That’s actually great news.”

“You’ll get to sit behind the oboes. You’ll have double reed buddies!” He bumped her shoulder, “Just promise me you won’t abandon me.”

“Toro, you know I would never.” She leaned against his shoulder, resting her head on him, “We’re inseparable.”

“A two for one special.”

“Exactly.”

~

As Mikey trudged down to his last class of the day, English, he was exhausted. Not that the day was all that strenuous, he just wasn’t used to being awake so early and for so long. As he entered the class, he immediately made eye contact with the ever-familiar Pete Wentz.

‘Fuck my life. Pete? Again?’ He thought, fighting back an eyeroll, looking over at the writing being projected onto the projector screen, ‘Oh god, as if this day couldn’t get any worse.’

On the seating chart, he was supposed to sit next to Pete. He took a deep breath, exhaling heavily as he made his way over, adjusting his glasses as he sat down next to the other boy. Pete was staring at him through his black hair, black eyeliner faded from when he saw him earlier in band.

“Hi.” Mikey decided to speak first to get it out of the way.

“Hi.” Pete squeaked, cheeks red.

Mikey sighed. Pete looked really cute when he was blushing. He tried really hard not to think about that as he took out his English binder, placing it on the desk. Pete had a notebook in front of him, his hand covering it, as well as a binder.

“How was your summer?” Mikey asked, “Besides- uh- the thing.”

Pete visibly flinched at the memory, taking a moment to think before responding, “It was fine. Could’ve been better. I spent a lot of time with Trick.”

“That’s good.” Mikey released a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding.

“How was yours?” Pete looked as though the conversation hurt viscerally.

“Pretty good. Worked a lot. Played video games.” He looked up at the projector, “Y’know why we have assigned seating?”

“No clue.” Pete sighed, “I wouldn’t’ve chosen to sit here.”

Mikey rolled his head back, muttering, “I’m sorry, Pete, there’s nothing I can do about that.”

“I-I know. I’m sorry.” Pete put his head in his hand, “It’s just- it’s really hard to see you.”

Mikey wanted to place his hand on Pete’s shoulder, but restrained himself. He loved the time he spent with Pete, he really did. It was just all too much too soon.

“Good afternoon, class.” The teacher, a young blonde, stood before the class, “Welcome to English 11. I’m Ms. Fielder.”

“Is she new?” Mikey whispered to Pete.

“I think so.” Pete muttered back.

After going over her class rules and the syllabus, she went on to explain her seating chart. 

“I know you’re probably not all thrilled by the idea of assigned seating, but it’s much easier for me to remember your names this way.” She chuckled, “And it works out perfectly, because the person you’re sitting next to is conveniently your partner for our first project! Isn’t that great?”

Mikey and Pete looked at each other, sighing. Fuck their lives.

“Each pairing has a number next to it, if we look here at the overhead-” She pointed, “-each number corresponds to a Shakespeare play. I suggest you highlight the one you’re assigned on your syllabus.”

Pete was muttering something to himself as he looked down the line of plays on the class outline, looked back up at the projector screen, then back down at his paper.

“Fuck me…” Pete muttered under his breath.

Mikey finally looked down, searching for the play they got assigned, grumbling when he came to the same conclusion as Pete, “God dammit, we got Romeo and Juliet.”