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Chapter Text

Rome – June 2021

A warm breeze flows through the large, open windows in Eli Stabler’s bedroom as he looks around at the clothes scattered across his bed. He’s supposed to leave for camp tomorrow, but he's having some trouble getting organized. He puts his hands on his hips and takes in a deep breath, letting it out with a long whoosh. At the same time, his mother stops in front of his open door and settles against the door jamb with her arms crossed.

“How’s packing going, honey?” Kathy asks, sensing it might not be going well.

Eli lets out another sigh. "Not great so far, but I’ll figure it out."

"Did you print out the list they sent over?"

"Yeah, I did. So that helps at least. I’m just trying to remember what I brought last summer and what else I might want to have with me this year."

"Well, let me know if you need any help. I’ll be around."

"Thanks, Mom."

The pair exchange small smiles before Kathy continues down the hallway to the living room. A few minutes later, his father makes the same move and stops in Eli’s doorway to check on him. When Eli notices him, he raises his eyebrows and turns up the corner of his mouth as if to say, “What, did Mom send you in here?” 

"How’s it going, buddy?"

"I’ve been having a little trouble putting my stuff together, but I’ll figure it out."

"Did you print out the list the camp sent out?"

"Yup. Got it right here."

"Well, if there’s anything you do forget to pack, we can always pick it up once we get to New York.

Eli nods. "Okay, sounds good. Thanks." 

The pair again share small smiles. As Elliot goes to walk back down the hallway, Eli asks him a question.

"Hey Dad, what are you gonna do with all that free time while I’m at camp?"

Elliot sighs and his shoulders sink a little. "I’m not 100% sure. Of course, I’ll spend time with your siblings and probably hang out with Kieran and Seamus a lot since they’re not in school. I might try and reconnect with some old friends too."

"Oh, okay. Cool."

Eli hesitates slightly before continuing, "I’m glad you’re coming with me, Dad. It’ll be nice to have a little time with just us two."

"Me too, bud. Me too."

Although Eli was old enough to fly to New York on his own, Elliot decided to go with him and spend the summer in the U.S. That way, he could drive Eli to Camp Allerton himself and then visit him over the Fourth of July weekend. When anyone asked why he wanted to do this, Elliot would just say he wanted to spend more time with his older kids and grandkids. However, the real reason was that he just wanted some time away from his wife.

He thought being a dedicated detective who investigated vicious felonies was the root cause of his marital problems, but moving away and changing jobs still hadn't seemed to make things any better. After leaving the NYPD, an old friend from the Marines offered him a job working for his private security firm which had an outfit based in Rome. The pay was more than double his previous salary and the work was comparatively easy. But while Kathy thrived in Rome, Elliot struggled to feel like he belonged. Their apartment might look out over a fifteenth-century palazzo now, but their fights remained the same as ever.

The trio still made the occasional trip back to New York to visit the older kids, but now for the first time, Eli couldn’t wait to be back in the States to spend the summer with his camp friends. If nothing else, it would give him some respite from his parents’ constant bickering and sniping. Ever since they moved to Rome, Eli feels more like an only child stuck in the middle of a nasty divorce, even though his parents are still technically married. There, he had no one to run to who fully understood what it was like to be him.

Because he’s so much younger than his other siblings, he’s always felt a bit out of place. But during their last visit, Eli got to spend a lot more time with his siblings without their parents around, and the five of them had a lot of good heart-to-heart conversations. Maureen, Kathleen, Dickie, and Lizzie had all made it clear to Eli that he really did belong and that he could count on all of them to be in his corner. Ever since then, he's never felt so close to them even though they live on different hemispheres. Now, every time he goes to church, he prays that one day he could reach them in nine minutes instead of nine hours. 

Over the last few months, Eli has been talking with (and venting to) his siblings more regularly, especially Dickie. It’s clear to the five of them that their parents’ marriage is on its last legs. For real this time. They've all spent enough time in religion classes to know the Catholic Church does not love divorce and it's no secret that their parents take the Church’s teachings very seriously. But, on the other hand, religion classes and weekly mass also taught them that God loves everyone and wants what’s best for them. Eli logically knows that, for his parents at least, ending their marriage is not as simple as just deciding not to be together anymore.

Or is it? After all, how could it be God’s will for two people to be miserable together instead of happy apart? 

New York City – June 2021

Anything but a warm breeze flows through Olivia and Noah Benson’s apartment as the two review the camp packing list for the third time that day. It’s 85 degrees and muggy outside, so ice-cold air-conditioning is a must. Noah is sitting cross-legged on his bed amongst the various piles of clothes and toiletries while his mom stands at the end of the bed. Her newly-acquired reading glasses are perched halfway down her nose as she reads off each item. 

"T-shirts?"

"Yep, got 14 of 'em."

"Shorts and pants?"

"Yep"

"Hoodies?"

"Yep"

"Socks and underwear?"

"Yes, mooooom," Noah drawls out dramatically.

"Hey! I’m only trying to make sure you don’t have a repeat of our Florida trip last summer," Olivia quips back.

Noah hangs his head slightly, conceding that his mom may have a point. "Yeahhhh, I knowwww."

"You got your toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, body soap, and all that?"

"Yep"

"Phone charger?"

"I think I’ve got everything, Mom. We’ve been over the list three times now."

Olivia drops her shoulders and tilts her head when she looks back up at Noah. "I know, sweet boy. I guess I’m just a little nervous about you being so far away from home for so long."

"But you said this camp was safe! And there’s so many fun things to do there!"

"I know, sweetheart. But worrying is just what moms do. "

"I guess so," Noah says with a shrug. " So what are you going to do the whole time I’m gone?"

"Hmm, you mean when I'm not missing you like crazy? I’m not quite sure yet. I mean, I’ll still have to go to work, of course."

Noah replies, "Eww, that’s boooorrrrringgg! Won't you be lonely when you come home by yourself afterward?"

Olivia chuckles at Noah's dramatics. "I suppose you have a little bit of a point." She then decides to sass him right back while poking his belly to make him laugh. "Although, I guess I will have time to do all the stuff that I like to do that you don’t. How’s that?" She continues tickling him until tears almost come out of his eyes.

It takes Noah a couple of minutes to regain his composure after giggling so hard. "Hey, I mean, now’s your chance, right?"

"I guess so. But after this summer, I might never let you leave the house again, mister," Olivia says with a cocked eyebrow. While the threat is fake, she can tell Noah has still fallen for it by the way his mouth hangs wide open in shock. "Now, can you help me get all this stuff into your bags?"

Olivia and Noah start to pack his things into the large L.L. Bean duffel recommended for purchase by Camp Allerton. Noah originally heard about the camp from two of his friends at school, and after running CIA-level recon on every person even remotely associated with the place, Olivia acquiesced and signed him up. The camp was geared towards city kids who didn’t get to spend much time enjoying nature in real, living color. He would spend the next eight weeks living in a cabin with a dozen other boys his age with little to no access to TV or video games. Instead, the goal was for campers to fill their days playing games outside, making art of all kinds, and learning valuable life skills. Junior campers were also buddied up with senior campers for the first few weeks, at least until their parents came to visit over the Fourth of July weekend. 

It had cost Olivia a pretty penny, but she knew that her son would be just as well-occupied and well-looked after if he spent the entire summer with Lucy. She secretly hoped that spending so much time outside in nature would give him the chance to feel more like a “normal” kid who lived on a suburban cul-de-sac rather than a twelve-story Manhattan apartment building. Being a city girl down to her core, she also knew this might be Noah’s only shot at learning how to build a bonfire, fish, and pitch a tent because there was no way in hell she was going to teach him. 

She finds Noah’s concern about her being lonely both endearing and pitiful. However, what Noah doesn’t know is that Olivia has lined up a truly spectacular summer for herself. As much as she loves her son, being an NYPD captain and a mom doesn’t always leave her time to just be Olivia. In Noah's mind, “the stuff I like to do” is mostly just going to art museums and shopping for new shoes. What he doesn't know is that this category of activities also includes watching copious amounts of Bravo reality shows, going out to fancy wine bars, and calling up one of the men (or women) on her current roster of casual sexual partners. But, given that he’s only eight, it would obviously be inappropriate for him to know that. And while she wouldn’t trade her life now for anything, it would be nice to have a little less to worry about on a daily basis. Or at least to have someone else to share those worries with her.

As he helps his mom pack his duffel, Noah can't help thinking about whether his mom will be lonely while he's gone. He knows that it's not really something he needs to worry about, but his mom can't really spend the whole summer going to art museums and shopping for shoes, can she?

He then thinks back to the photographs he found in his mom's nightstand a few nights ago. Noah knows he's not supposed to snoop through Olivia's things, but Lucy was sleeping over that night and his curiosity had gotten the better of him on his way back from the bathroom. He found a handful of pictures of his mom with a man he didn't recognize. The man was a few inches taller than her and had really short, brown hair. He looked like he could probably pick up some really heavy stuff too.

Noah also liked how happy his mom looked in all the pictures. It was the same look she gave him after his dance recitals or when he gave her a homemade card on her birthday or Mother's Day. It was a look that always made him feel special, like she was literally pouring love into him.

Noah could tell that Olivia was a lot younger in those photos, which told him the man probably wasn't someone she was dating in secret either. For as long as he could remember, the two of them had been the exclusive members of Team Benson. Noah has vague recollections of when his mom dated Tucker and he got to go to Paris, but as far as he knows, she hasn't dated anyone else since. Of course, Noah loves his mom no matter what, but that still didn't stop him from also wishing he had a dad or a sibling to play with at home sometimes. Maybe this would be the summer that finally changed… Maybe he would finally get to meet the mystery man from those photos…

Vermont – June 2021

As he enters his third hour of driving, a weak but cool breeze flows through Calvin Arliss’s ancient Honda Civic. While the car's air conditioning was truly pathetic and there was a small open hole in the backseat floor, he was grateful to his grandparents for helping him get it in the first place. Calvin was doing his best to support himself through college, but even with a full tuition scholarship from Fordham University, student loans, and part-time jobs, it never seemed to be enough. 

That was why he was spending yet another summer as a counselor at Camp Allerton and not working as an unpaid intern fetching coffee for “important” people. He enjoyed his summers at camp, he really did, but Calvin couldn't help but worry that it wasn’t what he should be doing. He tried to quell the fear that he was missing out on potential post-grad opportunities by reminding himself how far he’d already come. After all, a kid with an upbringing like his was far more likely to be out on the street, strung out on drugs, or both.

Calvin was also trying his best to take solace in the fact that, as a veteran counselor, he was all but guaranteed a top-notch job assignment. Gone were long, hot days outside wrangling pre-teen boys away from things that can hurt them. If his boss made good on her promises, then Calvin was looking at eight weeks working in the infirmary, where he would have access to consistent air conditioning and a shower that didn’t have tree branches poking into it.

There was something incredibly peaceful about being in such a remote place and Calvin could feel himself becoming more relaxed as he got closer to camp. Even though he really wanted to spend his summer back in New York, he knew that a summer at camp would help restore his sense of peace and connection with nature.

Calvin liked to let his mind wander on long drives like this, thinking about anything and everything. On this particular drive, he found himself thinking about a book he had read as a kid - The Phantom Tollbooth. It had been one of his favorites and he had read it countless times at this point. His mind drifted to a quote from the book that had always stood out to him.

You may not see it now…but whatever we learn has a purpose and whatever we do affects everything and everyone else, if even in the tiniest way. Why, when a housefly flaps his wings, a breeze goes round the world; when a speck of dust falls to the ground, the entire planet weighs a little more; and when you stamp your foot, the earth moves slightly off its course.

Calvin often thought about how his life might've been different if one breeze had blown differently or if one speck of dust had landed in a different spot. What would his life have been like if his mother had never gotten hooked on drugs? What if Olivia Benson had never come into their lives? What if he had never been taken away from her? What if he got to change his name to Calvin Benson for real? What if?

As he turned onto the long, winding road leading to Camp Allerton, Calvin wondered to himself about what adventures this summer might bring. When he finally parked his car and hopped out to stretch his legs, a butterfly flew by right in front of his face, furiously flapping its wings. That had to be a sign, right? Perhaps this summer would unfold differently now because of it?

Unbeknownst to Calvin, if this summer were a lake, this butterfly was like throwing in a giant rock, creating ripples as far out as the eye can see.

Chapter Text

Vermont – Saturday, June 12, 2021

As Olivia turned onto the gravel road leading to Camp Allerton, Noah asked for the 38th time that day, “Are we there yet?” He could fully read the sign they had just passed and was now just trying to rile his mom up. Olivia rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh, “Yes, Noah. We’re here.” She found a space in the gravel parking lot and made sure the doors were locked so Noah couldn’t jump out before she could give him one last cautionary warning.

"Now, remember what I told you yesterday, Noah. If any person, whether it’s an adult or an older kid, touches you or says something to you that makes you feel uncomfortable, I need you to tell me. Please. Even if the other person tells you not to tell anyone else. And if you’re scared or uncomfortable talking to me about something for any reason, you know you can always call Uncle Fin and talk to him."

"Yes, Moooooom," Noah replies dramatically.

"Noah, I’m being serious. It’s my job as your mom to make sure you are safe and I can’t do that if something bad happens and you keep it a secret."

Noah's attitude quickly changes when he hears the serious tone in her voice. "I know."

"Also, it’s okay if you feel homesick too. That doesn’t make you a baby. I know you won’t always have your phone with you, but please remember that you can call me at any time for any reason. And I will make extra sure I’m available during phone call time right before bed every night." 

Olivia had been extremely hesitant to get Noah a phone at all, but she liked the idea of him having a more private way to contact her while he’s away. Noah claimed that some of his friends already had smartphones, but after Olivia discreetly talked to the other dance moms,  she confirmed Noah’s claims were exaggerations at best. She refused to budge and only allowed Noah to have the most basic flip phone she could find. Of course, Noah was irritated at first, but he actually had a lot of fun when Olivia tried to teach him how to text on a T9 keyboard “like they did in the olden days.” 

"Okay, Mom, I’ll remember. Can I please get out of the car now?" 

Olivia presses the button to unlock the rear doors. "Yes, you can. Let’s go get you checked in." 

Noah puts on his backpack once he hops out of the car and starts walking with Olivia up to the camp's main building to get checked in. He can’t help but feel a little nervous as he walks up to the check-in table, gripping the straps on his backpack a little tighter than normal. Olivia quickly noticed this and put her arm around his shoulder in an effort to comfort him. In truth, she was feeling just as apprehensive, even though she knew he would be perfectly safe. He was still her baby after all, no matter how big he got. 

The pair walked up to a friendly, older woman named Judy who was marking off campers’ names and showing them where their cabins were located. “Hi there! Welcome to Camp Allerton! Checking in?” 

"Yes, we are. This is my son, Noah Benson, and I’m his mom, Olivia."

"Wonderful! We are so excited you’re here, Noah. Let me just find your information here real quick." 

Judy starts looking through her printed spreadsheets to find his registration information and spots it on the second page. 

"Aha, here we go! Alright, Noah, it looks like you’ll be in Cabin 14 and I’ll mark that right here on this map for you. The counselor in charge of your cabin is named Colin. He’s great! And it looks like your senior camper buddy is named Eli. He'll be like your big brother while you're here. You’ll meet him tomorrow after all of the senior campers arrive."

Noah smiles at Judy, feeling a little bit better now. Judy then turns her attention to Olivia, who is still a little stunned at how chipper this woman is. 

"And just to confirm, Ms. Benson, you’re the first person to contact in case of any emergency?" 

"Yes, that’s correct. And you have Fin Tutuola listed as the backup contact?"

"Yes, we do. I’ve got his information right here just in case we’re unable to reach you." 

Just as Olivia thinks she's done, Judy continues, "Now, here is a map of the entire camp. We’re in this building right here and Cabin 14 is right over where this star is. You’re welcome to bring Noah’s things to his cabin, unpack everything, and explore the campgrounds. Lunch will be at 12:30 over in the pavilion. Parents are welcome to stay for lunch and then we'll have an information session afterwards where we’ll answer any last-minute questions you have." 

"Okay, that sounds great. Thank you so much, Judy." 

"You're very welcome!" 

Noah and Olivia leave the main building, and after a quick stop back at the car, they head over to Cabin 14. Olivia is a bit overwhelmed by the beauty and serenity of this place. The grass and trees are greener than anything she's ever seen before. She can hear the waves off the lake crashing into the rocky shore and imagines how nice it would be to fall asleep to that sound every night. 

When they reach Noah's cabin, the pair is greeted by his counselor Colin. 

"Hi there! I'm Colin! Are you in Cabin 14?" 

Olivia gently places her hand on Noah's back as a way of encouraging him to introduce himself. "Yep, I am. My name's Noah Benson." 

"Well, it's very nice to meet you, Noah. Is this your mom?" 

Noah smiles as he turns to look up at Olivia. "Yep! It is." 

Olivia reaches out to shake Colin's hand. Her mind is put at ease when he looks exactly like the photo she found during her recon. "Hi Colin, I'm Olivia." 

"It's nice to meet you too, Ms. Benson. I can show you around the cabin a little bit and then I'll give you two space to get unpacked and settled in." 

Colin takes his time showing them around the cabin, giving Noah plenty of time to look around and take it all in. He's seen other campers do this before, especially the younger ones. Some kids just needed to scope out the scene before they felt more comfortable. The cabin's main room has six twin beds on each side. At the head of each bed, there is a small storage unit with drawers and shelves where campers can store their clothes and personal items. There are two doorways along one wall; one opens into a tiny bedroom where Colin will sleep. The other leads to a small, three-season porch where there are a couple of couches and tables. Olivia is pleased to see a stack of board games and puzzles in the corner without a screen in sight. She can't picture herself staying here, especially given the detached, communal bathroom situation, but she imagines that won't make a difference to Noah. 

Olivia and Noah take their time unpacking Noah's duffel bag and making his bed just like it is back home. Once they're finished, they decide to take a walk around the camp and get a lay of the land. After a while, they decide to take a break and sit on a bench overlooking the nearby lake. 

"So, Noah, what do you think so far?" 

Noah smiles as he looks up at his mom. "I was a little bit nervous when we first got here, but now I feel a lot better. So far, everyone here has been really nice." 

"I agree. I felt a little nervous too, but you're right, everyone here has been friendly and helpful. I'm still going to miss you like crazy, but I think you'll have a lot of fun and make a lot of new friends." 

"I'm going to miss you too, Mom. But I hope you get to have fun. I don't want you to be sad the whole time I'm here." 

"I appreciate you saying that, honey. I really do. I promise I'll be okay. And before you know it, I'll be coming to visit for the Fourth of July!" 

Noah leans against Olivia and rests his head against her arm. "I love you, Mom. Thank you for letting me come here."

Olivia is grateful her son is still willing to show her this type of affection, but she's under no assumption that this phase will last forever. Olivia moves her arm to wrap it around Noah and pull him in close to her. Their eyes remain focused on the water in front of them. "I love you too, my sweet boy. So much. And you're very welcome. I hope you have so much fun and I can't wait to hear about all the adventures you have." 

They continue to sit and talk until it's time to eat lunch and say their final goodbyes. Afterwards, Noah is whisked away to join in the welcome activities with his fellow campers and Olivia joins the parents' information session. As dry as it was, it put her mind further at ease and gave her some last-minute reassurance. 

After spending the night in a nearby town, Olivia begins the long drive back to New York on Sunday morning. To her surprise, she didn't cry herself to sleep, nor was she a blubbering mess as she drove even further away from her baby. Make no mistake, a few tears were shed when she said her last goodbye to Noah, but more than anything, she can't wait to see what lies in store both for herself and her son. Something tells her this is one summer neither will surely forget…

Vermont – Sunday, June 13, 2021

Eli wakes up slowly on Sunday morning to the sound of birds chirping sweetly outside his window. He savors the fact that he wasn't woken up by an obnoxiously loud siren or someone shouting on the street for once. After being back in the States for almost a week now, he's mostly gotten over his jet lag too. He and his dad spent a couple of days at Maureen's house out in Jersey and then a couple of days at Dickie's place in the city so the three of them could go to the Mets game together. 

Eli is also thankful that they drove up to Vermont the day before, so they didn't have to hit the road at 4 am (which honestly saves them both from the other’s wrath). Instead, he and Elliot took their time getting ready and then found a quaint breakfast spot where Eli could get a humongous stack of blueberry pancakes and Elliot could get an absurd amount of egg whites and veggies. 

Even though his dad can be a pretty intense guy, Eli loves getting one-on-one time like this. He knows he gets a lot more of this than his siblings ever did growing up, but tries his best to remain grateful, nonetheless. After breakfast, they make the short drive out of town to Camp Allerton. 

This is Eli's third summer at camp and he would spend every summer for the rest of his life here if he could. He loves the peace and serenity of the lake, the trees, and the wide open spaces. Is the Mediterranean Sea bluer and sparklier? Sure. But it pales in comparison to spending a late July evening sitting around a bonfire with your best friends watching the sun set over the dark blue lake. 

He’s awoken from his daydream when his father shifts the car into park at the end of the long, winding road leading to camp. Ellot looks over at his son as he quickly shakes his head. "Alright, here we are. Let's get you all checked in, bud."  

As the pair walks up to the camp's main building, Eli recalls his first time making this walk. He remembers feeling a little apprehensive about what lay in store and praying with all his might that his parents could get through the day without snapping at each other. 

As soon as Elliot and Eli walk in, Judy immediately spots them from the other side of the room. 

"Eli! Welcome back! It's so good to see you!"

He can't help but smile at Judy's enthusiasm. "Hi Judy! It's good to see you too." 

Elliot then takes the opportunity to chime in, "Hey! What about me?" 

All three of them share a laugh and Judy turns her attention to Elliot, "It's great to see you too, Mr. Stabler. Don't think I’ve forgotten about you.” She pokes her head around Elliot’s shoulder, thinking maybe Kathy was hiding right behind him. “Where's Mrs. Stabler?" 

Elliot squirms a little at the question. He scratches the back of his neck as he tries to think of a polite way to explain that Kathy hates his breathing guts and refused to sit next to him for another nine-hour flight to New York. "Uhhhh, ya know, she decided to stay in Rome this year. Just couldn't get the time off work. And since my job's more flexible, I'm actually spending the whole summer over here." 

"Ahh, I see. Give her my best, will you?" 

"Of course, Judy. Will do." 

"Alright, let me just find Eli's registration info here… Aha! There we go. It looks like you'll be in Cabin 13 again this year and Andy will be your counselor again too. You also get a junior camper buddy for the first time this year! It looks like you're paired with Noah from Cabin 14. You two will meet later today. He's also from New York City and it’s his first time coming here." 

Eli nods in understanding. "Okay, awesome. Andy's the best!" 

"I know he's looking forward to having you in his cabin this year too. Now, I think you two know the drill. You have the rest of the morning to get settled in and lunch will be at 12:30 over in the pavilion. Of course, Mr. Stabler, you're welcome to stay and then the parent information session will be held right after that." 

"Sounds great, thanks, Judy," Elliot says with a soft smile.

Eli and Elliot then turn to leave the main building and head towards Eli’s cabin. As they make their way towards Cabin 13, Elliot can’t help but admire just how green everything is here. Sure, the parks in New York and Rome have some admirable greenery. Hell, he’d even kept their strip of grass in Queens looking pretty healthy for nearly two decades. But this place is something else. 

When they reach the cabin, they’re greeted by Eli’s counselor Andy. 

“Hey Eli! Welcome back! Are you in my cabin again this year?” Andy asks as he reaches out to give Eli a fist bump.

“You know it! I was so pumped when Judy told me.” 

“Aww, that’s great, man.” He then turns to Elliot, looks him square in the eyes, and reaches out to shake his hand. “It’s great to see you too, Mr. Stabler.”

“Thanks, Andy. Good to see ya again.” Elliot secretly thinks Andy is a little too much of a square, but even so, Elliot has no problem trusting him because he’s a good, responsible kid (at least according to the thorough background check Elliot ran on him last year). And he can shake hands like a grown man, which will always win a guy points in Elliot Stabler’s book. Plus, he managed to keep Eli out of any trouble last summer, so he really can’t complain too much. 

Andy then turns his attention back to Eli. “I think a couple of other guys from last year’s cabin are in here this year too. But you’re the first one here so far. Feel free to choose whichever bed you like, get settled in, and let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.” 

“Thanks, Andy. Will do.” 

Eli and Elliot step into the cabin and Eli looks around at the twelve empty beds lining each wall. He chooses a bed right underneath one of the large windows and plops one of his duffels down. 

“Home sweet home, huh, bud?” Elliot asks, smiling down at Eli. He can see how much more at peace his son is after just a short time here. 

Eli looks up at his father, “Sure is, Dad. Thanks for letting me come back this summer.” 

“You’re welcome, son.” Elliot waits a minute before taking a chance with his next question. “How do you feel about getting paired with a junior camper this year?” He sees how good Eli is with Seamus and Kieran, but it’s not like he has much of a choice either. 

“I’m kinda excited about it, actually. I think it’ll be fun to show him the ropes just like my senior campers did with me. I guess it’ll kinda be like having a little brother or something.” 

Until now, Elliot had never really considered the fact that Eli has never been a big brother before. Being the youngest of five, and almost 15 years younger than Lizzie and Dickie, he’s always been the (oops) baby of the family. Sure, he’s Uncle Eli to his two young nephews, but being a big brother inherently carries a different type of responsibility. “Maybe it’ll be good for him to get some practice. Who knows, he might need it someday,” Elliot thinks. Now, where did that thought come from? 

Chapter Text

Vermont – Monday, June 28, 2021

Life at Camp Allerton was not rigidly structured like other camps might be. At the beginning of each week, campers signed up for the activities and classes they wanted to participate in. The options were nearly endless, from drawing and pottery classes to basketball tournaments, canoeing on the lake, and even overnight camping trips. The only mandatory activity was “Telephone Time” (colloquially known as “TP Time”) every evening, where campers were required to make some kind of contact with their families, either by calling or texting. From 7 to 8 pm every day, a chorus of chatter rang through the trees as campers regaled that day’s adventures to their families.

Meal times were also more structured than the average camp. It was one of Camp Allerton’s long-standing traditions that every meal was eaten family style around real dining room tables. This was to give the kids both a sense of normalcy, like they were sitting around the dinner table at home, and a sense of responsibility and respect for one another. Each day, a pair of students at each table was in charge of setting out the silverware, grabbing food and drink refills from the kitchen, and cleaning up. It was pretty hard to be rude to your fellow camper after they served your eggs and bacon or fetched your favorite cereal just for you.

In the two weeks since their arrival, Eli and Noah have settled into their own little routines at Camp Allerton. They were both surprised at how quickly they fell into a comfortable rhythm with one another. While Noah spent most of his days taking dance classes and playing baseball, Eli spent his playing soccer and taking drawing classes. But, like magnets, they always seemed to find one another during break times, taking turns showing off their new drawings and dance moves. When it was their turn to serve meals, they were effortlessly in sync as though they’d been rehearsing for days.

Neither boy had the words to describe this sense of kismet that drew them together. When their hands met for the first time on the day Eli arrived, it was as if some kind of magical spell had bonded them together, almost like they were long-lost siblings or twins separated at birth. Their six-year age gap did not seem to stop them from forming a brotherly bond unlike anything they’d experienced before. While neither would say it out loud, both Eli and Noah were secretly dreading the end of camp when they’d have to go their separate ways, potentially forever.

One Monday afternoon, Eli and Noah were both signed up for that day’s basketball tournament. Senior and junior campers would each take turns playing short 3-on-3 games until one senior team and one junior team had been crowned the winners. When one group wasn’t playing, they were cheering on and “coaching” one another from the sidelines.

As Noah’s team was playing a game in the second round, Calvin was working in the infirmary a short distance away. The infirmary was part of the main camp building where check-in had been held two weeks earlier. There was one large screened-in window that directly faced the basketball court, which was just a raised concrete slab with two hoops on either end and two small bleachers on the side.

Calvin stood directly in front of the window, watching the basketball tournament while he organized supplies. Six young boys, including Noah, were playing much the same way eight-year-old boys would in a schoolyard or on someone’s driveway. No real plays were being run, passes were frequently missed, and shots were often taken from between the legs instead of their chests.

Calvin watched as Noah scored his first basket of the game, and in his excitement, he started pirouetting and leaping toward the other end of the court like he was doing an “across the floor” exercise in dance class. While the two supervising counselors are deep in conversation, a few senior boys whose junior buddies were on the opposing team start taunting Noah from the sidelines.

One boy, Alex, scoffs and yells out, “Hey, since when did they let fairy princesses play in this tournament?” This gets a few of the other boys to start laughing along.

Another boy, Nick, adds his own quip. “Yeah, last time I checked this wasn’t a fucking princess tea party.”

Noah stops what he’s doing and looks over at where Alex and Nick are sitting. He’s a bit flustered that he’d been singled out like that, but he’s also not sure how or if he should respond. He’s only ever heard curse words like that when his mom stubs her toe and thinks he can’t hear her; he’s never heard them used in anger like this. Thankfully for Noah, Eli stands up and chimes in just in time. “Hey man, knock it off. He’s just a kid. Leave him alone.”

Alex glances around at Nick and some of the other guys before getting up and walking over to face Eli head-on. “Nah, I don’t think I will. Basketball’s not a game for princesses, and this ain’t fucking dance class.”

All six boys on the court stop what they’re doing to look over at the bubbling commotion. Noah, frozen in place, is even more embarrassed now that he’d potentially started this whole thing by accident.

Eli then steps up to face Alex and Nick man-to-man. They were practically bumping chests, and he could feel his blood start to boil underneath the surface. A small group had now formed around them too, as if this was a face-off between the Sharks and the Jets on the Upper West Side. “Look, dude, I don’t know what the hell your problem is. But leave. Him. Alone.”

“Or what? You gonna tattle on me to your daddy? Gonna call the cops on me?” Alex jeers with a whiny, mocking tone.

“Yeah, nah, that’s not really my style. I prefer to handle problems on my own. Like the old-school guys back in Italy taught me.”

Being an Italian kid from Long Island, that should’ve been enough of a warning to Alex not to fuck with Eli (even if he is lying about learning to fight from mobsters). It’s at that point that Noah unfreezes, sensing that the situation is going nowhere good. He runs over and tries to put his small body between Eli and Alex’s larger ones. “Eli! Don’t! This isn’t a good idea!”

Alex completely ignores Noah and spits back, “Well, good. So do I. And we’ve got a BIG problem here. This is what you get for defending little fairy princess gay boys!” He then lunges forward and tackles Eli off the concrete court and onto the ground. As soon as his back hits the ground, Eli gets met with a swift jab to his left cheek. “Motherfucker,” he mutters to himself as the adrenaline continues to build and pump blood into his muscles. Without hesitation, Eli puts that energy to use and flips Alex onto his back so he can “return the favor.”

At the same time, Calvin runs out of the infirmary and shouts to the two counselors nearby. He’s got no clue how they haven’t noticed what’s going on until now. By this point, the rest of the senior boys have all chosen sides and are pairing off into squabbles of their own. Calvin and the other two counselors work quickly to pull the boys apart and separate them from one another. When the adults finally get to Eli and Alex, they’re still throwing jabs and rolling around in the grass.

Calvin gets to them first and yells out, “Hey! HEY! Knock it off!”

It takes two full-grown men to pry the two teenagers apart and at least 20 yards of separation for them to finally start cooling down. Calvin takes hold of Eli and starts walking him towards the infirmary. One of Alex’s blows managed to slice his cheek open, and Calvin can see his knuckles are pretty beaten up. Since he can tell Eli is still seething, he turns the younger boy to face him and looks him directly in the eyes.

“Hey man, let’s calm down. Take a deep breath.”

Eli complies, but there’s still steam coming out of his ears. “God dammit! He was just pissing me off so bad! Didn’t you hear all that bullshit he was saying about Noah?”

“I did, and I’m not saying I condone that either. But throwing punches and cursing at each other is not a productive way to solve problems. Now, let’s go get you patched up. Come on.”

Calvin taps Eli on the arm, and as the two start to continue walking again, they hear a soft whimper coming from a few feet away. They both turn and see Noah kneeling on the grass next to the basketball court, holding his stomach while rocking back and forth. Eli immediately starts jogging over to him with Calvin close behind.

Eli crouches down as he approaches and places a hand on Noah’s shoulder. “Hey Noah, what’s going on? Are you okay?”

Between sobs, the younger boy manages to choke out, “I got knocked down somehow and now my tummy hurts like I’m gonna throw up.”

Calvin quickly chimes in, “Uh oh! That’s not good. Why don’t you come back to the infirmary with me and Eli so I can make sure you’re okay?”

Noah looks up at Calvin and frowns, tears still sliding down his cheeks. “Okay.”

Eli helps Noah stand up and continues holding his hand while the three of them walk to the infirmary. Inside, there are two small cots side-by-side with the backs elevated. Once the younger boys hop on them, Calvin passes Noah a popcorn/vomit bowl to hold in his lap before crouching down in front of him.

“Noah, is it just your tummy that hurts? Or did you get hurt anywhere else?”

Noah holds his hands out to show the small scrapes on the heels of his palms. “I scraped my hands and my knees when I fell down too. I felt a little dizzy too, but not anymore.”

“Okay… Ahh, yeah, I can see that. Do you know who knocked you down or maybe hit you in the tummy?”

“No, I didn’t really see. It all happened so fast once everybody started fighting. Before I knew what was happening, I felt somebody elbow me and then I got spun around as I fell onto the basketball court.”

“Ahh okay, I gotcha. I’m sorry that happened though. Must’ve been scary.”

Noah juts out his bottom lip as he nods affirmatively, a couple of errant tears still trailing down his cheeks. Calvin assesses the scrapes, and once he applies some antibiotic ointment and a couple of band-aids, he moves on to patching up his next patient.

Eli has finally calmed down and looks up at Calvin with a sheepish look as he applies more ointment and band-aids. “Umm, do you know if Alex got badly hurt at all?”

Calvin quickly glances out the window before answering. “I didn’t get a good look, but I don’t think so. Just a couple of scrapes.”

“Okay, that’s good, I guess. I really didn’t mean to hurt him that bad or anything.”

“I know, man. While I can’t promise you won’t get in any trouble for this, I do think my bosses will understand where you were coming from. They’re not unreasonable, but they’re also responsible for everything that happens here, good and bad.” Calvin then gets up and walks over to the filing cabinets underneath the large window to start looking for Eli and Noah’s emergency contact forms.

“That’s fair, I guess.” Eli then throws his head back against the cot. “Ughhh, my dad is gonna be so pissed though! I mean, my brother said our Dad used to get in all kinds of fights when he was a freakin’ cop, but still.”

Calvin turns his head away from the folder he’s searching. “Hey Eli, speaking of which, what’s your last name again? I am gonna have to call your dad to let him know you got hurt.”

“Stabler. I think my dad’s name and number should be listed on my form. He’s the OG Elliot Stabler.”

Calvin briefly chuckles to himself. Then, all of a sudden, just as he spots Eli’s form, he gets an unsettling feeling of déjà vu and pauses. He knows he’s heard the name Elliot Stabler before, but can’t quite remember where until–

“No… There’s no way it’s the same guy… It can’t be…,” he thinks to himself. He quickly shakes his head back and returns to the present moment.

“Okay, got it. Yeah, I see his info here.”

Calvin lays Eli’s form on top of the folder and then starts shuffling through the folder with the junior campers’ forms. Somehow, there’s only one camper named Noah this year, so that one was easy to find. When he finds the parent info section, he does a double-take. 

Parent Name: Olivia Benson Relationship: Mother

“What the hell? There’s no way…,” he thinks. 

Calvin turns his head over his shoulder towards Noah. “Hey Noah, can you remind me of your last name?”

“It’s Benson.”

“Okay, got it. And your mom’s name is Olivia, right?”

“Yeah. But sometimes her friends call her Liv.”

Suddenly, a light bulb goes off in Eli’s head. He and Noah hadn’t talked much about their families or lives back home, but they knew the basics. Eli knew Noah lived in New York City with his mom, and Noah knew that Eli lived in Italy with his parents, even though they were American.

“Wait, Noah, your mom’s name is Olivia Benson?”

“Yeah. So?”

“Is she a cop in New York City?”

“Yup. She’s been a detective for like, ever.”

“Dude! I think I knew your mom when I was little! She and my dad used to work together, I think, and she was one of my dad’s best friends. They stopped working together a long time ago, though, so I haven’t seen her in forever.”

“Whoa! Really?!”

Now Calvin is starting to put some of his own puzzle pieces together. “If Eli belongs to Elliot Stabler and Noah belongs to Olivia Benson, and both parents are cops, then….” Before his brain has a chance to think for one more second, he turns around and blurts out–

“Wait, you two didn’t already know each other?” 

Noah and Eli look at each other and then at Calvin with confused looks on their faces. 

Eli replies with a shrug. “Nope. My parents and I moved to Rome when I was, like, three or four? And my dad never really talks about stuff that happened before then, so I doubt he’s kept in touch with anyone he used to work with.”

“Huh. Wild…,” Calvin says, briefly letting himself stare off into space.

“What’s wild?” Noah asks, confused about Calvin’s response.

Calvin realizes he has to think of a kid-appropriate way to explain how he knows Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson. Eli is definitely older than he was at the time, but Noah is probably too young to hear about most of the awful shit he went through as a kid. He puts his hands in his pockets as he leans against the filing cabinets.

“Sooo, ummm, I actually knew both your parents when I was a kid too. My mom used drugs on and off when I was growing up, and she went through a particularly rough time when I was like 10 or 11. I think she had been a victim of some kind of crime, and they both were trying to help her. I even stayed with Olivia for a little while when it wasn’t safe for me to be at my own house.”

Noah’s eyebrows shot up, and he exclaimed, “No way!”

Eli’s eyes are similarly bugged out. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah. And back then, I would’ve sworn she and Elliot would be partners forever. That’s why it’s so crazy to me that they wouldn’t be friends anymore.”

Noah furrows his brow in confusion once again, “Why’s that?”

“They just seemed so inseparable, so in sync with one another. Like they were practically glued together or something,” the older boy explained somewhat wistfully.

Noah giggles quietly to himself, imagining his mom doing something as silly as gluing herself to some big, tough police officer like the ones on TV.

“My parents weren’t married, but a lot of my friends’ parents were, and Elliot and Olivia acted just like them. Like they couldn’t get sick of spending time together if they tried. I thought they totally had crushes on each other too.”

“Really?” Now, Noah couldn’t be more intrigued.

Meanwhile, Eli has been quietly trying to sort through his own memories of that time. He remembers that he loved getting to visit Dad and Livvy at work. He remembers vividly how he would go from playing with Lego figures on her desk to being held while he dozed off to chasing her around the bunks after he woke up a couple of hours later. The memories brought a smile to his face as he tuned back in to Calvin and Noah’s conversation.

“… I mean, I would have thought any two kids named Benson and Stabler would have been just as inseparable.”

“Wow, that’s so crazy you knew my mom before I did!”

“Yeah, I guess it kinda is,” Calvin says with a soft chuckle. “I remember we’d have squirt gun wars all over the apartment, and Olivia would always pack me the best lunches. It was pretty awesome! I was so sad then when I couldn’t stay with her anymore, because my real mom was never gonna do any of that kind of stuff with me. Olivia was, and is, the best mom I’ve ever had.”

Calvin grimaces inside at his inadvertent admission. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed per se; it was just that he had never admitted that out loud to anyone else before. Living with his own mother had been nothing if not turbulent, and while Olivia's life wasn't perfect either, she provided a sense of protection and stability Vivian never could. Things did get a little better when he moved in with his grandparents, but a piece of him always wished he could have become "Calvin Benson" for real.

Noah lights up at Calvin’s stories, and they remind him of some of his own favorite memories. He can’t help but smile brightly, as if he wasn’t knocked to the ground and elbowed in the stomach 30 minutes earlier. “We have squirt gun wars at our apartment! And Mom always packs fun stuff in my lunch too! She always makes sure to pack my favorite chips, and sometimes I get a huge brownie if I do good on a test.” He pauses, considering the last thing Calvin said. “I mean, I’ve really only had one mom, but I agree, she's totally the best.”

Then Eli chimes in. “I remember I would come visit Dad and Olivia at work sometimes as a special treat. I thought his job was so cool! It was like he got to be a real-life superhero and fight bad guys all day! Livvy would always let me play with Legos at her desk, and sometimes we’d play tag in the bunks upstairs. I especially liked when she would hold me when I fell asleep or sneak me candy out of the vending machine when my dad wasn’t looking.”

“Mom lets me play Legos on her desk sometimes too! But I’m not allowed to have candy when I go to work with her. She says it makes me ‘too hyper.’” Noah attempts to make air quotes as he imitates Olivia, which makes all three boys laugh.

“Maybe she learned her lesson dealing with you, Eli,” Calvin jokes, though he immediately worries he’s gone a step too far.

Thankfully, Eli takes it in stride. “Hey, you’re probably not wrong,” he says with a chuckle, causing all three to share another laugh.

Just as the laughter starts to subside, another lightbulb goes off in Eli’s head. “Wait, Calvin, did you say you thought my dad and Noah’s mom ‘like liked’ each other?”

Calvin shrugs. “Yeah, I mean, I was only like 11, so what do I know, but it definitely seemed like it to me at the time.”

“Huh. Well, I wonder if something happened that made them not be friends anymore. My dad has literally never talked about Olivia since we moved to Rome. At least not when I’m around.”

Now bells are going off in Noah’s head, and he turns to look up at Eli. “Now that I think about it, sometimes Mom talks about stuff she used to do with her best friend Elliot. But it’s weird that I would have never met him because I think I’ve met all her best friends.” He pauses for a second, giving his brain a chance to catch up to his mouth. “Wait! Okay, I don’t think I’m supposed to know this, but Mom does have pictures in her nightstand with some random guy I’ve never seen in real life before. Maybe that’s Elliot? I think they’re from way before I was born, but I remember she looked super happy in all of them.”

“Actually, that reminds me, before I left for camp, I was helping my dad organize some storage boxes, and I found a whole shoebox full of pictures of him and Liv along with little notes she’d written to him. He told me not to tell my mom he still has them.”

Calvin can’t quite believe how Eli and Noah’s stories mesh together so perfectly. This sparks an idea that he thinks is either brilliant, idiotic, or both. “Hey guys, I don’t know if you’re interested in my two cents, but if neither of them threw out those photos, I’d bet they could still be friends again one day. Like, why keep the photos if you never want to see that person again?”

Eli contemplates the question for a moment. “Yeah, that’s a really good point.”

Calvin then decides to take a chance on his potentially stupid idea, “Do you know if either of them are coming to Parents Weekend in a couple weeks?”

“Yeah, for sure!”

“Mom said she definitely was!”

“Well then, I think I might have an idea.”

It’s evident from the smiles on Noah and Eli’s faces that they’re all in as Calvin starts to lay out his idea for how to help Elliot and Olivia reconnect. Who knows, maybe they could all get their happy ending after all?