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An absolutely self-indulgent One Direction au but gay and polyamorous without shitty management and toxicity. This idea all came from a short discord convo I had about One Direction. This is not X-Factor canon, there are some differences (mainly because the Wiki was incredibly sparse about the process). Includes hidden relationsips, two-sided beard relationships, and lots of humor, drama and fluff. It's also the shorted fic I have written in years! Not 150k+ words! Anyways, enjoy!

Shoto was not nervous. He was in line behind an older woman, with Enji breathing down his neck, about to perform in front of both a crowd of people, and have it be televised for the world. But he had no stakes in this. Enji wanted one of his kids to be famous, and Shoto had an alright voice that his father wanted to capitalize on. He didn't know that Shoto had already been accepted by a community college. 

He did that to piss off the man once Shoto was outdone, kicked off the show, and could live his own life telling Enji, “Hey, I tried. I wasn't good enough.” Then he could fuck off to community college with his own money from working through home schooled high school, and find some roommates or something. Anything to get away from his father. 

“Now, don't embarrass me.” Shoto ignored him, face blank as he stared ahead. The woman in front of Shoto and the teenage woman behind them looked at Shoto in pity. It was easy to tell he didn't want to be there, and by his father’s behavior, that it was his idea. “And make sure you smile! Don't look apathetic to the judges.” 

“Why don't you go out and perform how you want to?” Shoto asked blandly. The woman in front of them snickered into her hand, before she was called onto stage. Shoto started to feel nervous butterflies. He didn't really know anybody who would make fun of him in real life if he did poorly, but he was still getting nervous. 

The woman performed pretty poorly, and Enji looked pleased. There were some really good performances so far, and Shoto knew he wouldn't compare to the energy they’d brought to the stage. 

Shoto walked out on stage when a man waved him forward, walking out into the sight of the four judges with a nervous breath intake. He already passed the ghost audition to see if he was even worth being televised. He’d be okay. 

He was wearing a dress shirt and jeans, and stiffened just slightly when the crowd, sounding like mostly women, started screaming. “Hello,” Hizashi Yamada greeted. 

“Hello,” Shoto responded with a polite nod. 

“What’s your name and why are you auditioning?” Shouta asked. 

“My name is Shoto Todoroki. I’m auditioning because my family wants me to.” The judge blinked, with Nemuri Kayama snickering to herself, while Shouta looked unimpressed. 

“Do you not want to be here?” Yamada asked, sounding genuinely worried. Shoto knew Enji was fuming right now. He didn't really care. 

“I'm fine with being here. I'm good with either passing or not passing. So don't worry about hurting my feelings if you don't like my performance,” Shoto answered politely. 

Shouta was watching him closely, and saw his eyes drift to the side of the stage. Shoto assumed Enji was looking pissed or arguing with the stage guard. Shoto didn't look. “Tell us a bit about yourself,” Shouta said. 

“I just turned 18 and if I don't pass this, I’m going to a community college.” 

“To study what?” 

“I don't know yet. I don't know what I want to do or be yet. I've been pretty sheltered so I think going out and meeting new people will be good for me and give me an idea of what kind of future I want to have,” Shoto explained. He was surprised when Shouta smiled, looking pleased. Yamada asked what song Shoto was performing, and it was one that he hadn't told Enji about. It was his favorite song. Enji hated that Shoto liked “girly” songs, so forbade him from singing anything sung by a woman. Just another “fuck you” to him.

The music started in the background, and Shoto took a deep breath. He wasn't too nervous, because he honestly did not care if he did poorly and was not moved forward. He sang, stiff on the stage, no body movement. Shouta grinned, while the other three judges seemed surprised for some reason. 

Usually they cut off early, but they let Shoto sing the entire song, getting to the very end with the hard to hit note that he was able to reach. Once he was done, he let out a breath. The crowd was silent, before he got a standing ovation, which stunned him. He didn't think he was that good. Even the judges were standing up. Shoto wiped his sweaty hand on his pants, feeling suddenly very untethered. He didn't expect people to actually like his voice. 

“You look surprised," Nemuri said with a smile. Shoto pursed his lips, unsure how to respond. “Your voice is beautiful, and that kind of range for a male voice is pretty rare unless you’ve had years of vocal coaching.” Shoto’s cheeks flushed. He was not used to compliments from people. "I'm saying yes.” 

“It's a yes from me,” Hizashi offered, also grinning. 

“I wasn't expecting much from your performance based on your energy, but you proved me wrong,” Sekijiro Kan offered. “A yes from me.” 

Shoto numbly looked at Shouta for the last answer, even though it didn't matter what he thought, Shoto had three yesses. “Is this what you want? Because your voice is something special. Do you want this?” Shoto nodded. “Then it's a yes from me, too. Looks like you’ll be meeting plenty of people from now on. No more sheltered life.” 

“Okay. Thank you,” Shoto said stiffly, and left the stage, handing the microphone off to the person who took it from him. Shoto knew he had to face his father soon. 

Someone came after him, “Mr. Todoroki. Shoto.” 

“Huh?” Shoto asked, still shocked by a whole room liking something he’d done. 

“This is the last public audition. Meaning Bootcamp starts soon. You need to know where to go for that.” 

“Oh, right.” Shoto gathered himself together, and found Enji already talking with the producer about where Shoto would be going next. He had gone into this expecting Enji would hate him for not making it in. Now that Shoto was progressing, his father was going to be a pain in the ass. Or, this could be Shoto’s way to get away from him. He had no idea. For now, he’d just go with the flow.

Knowing Shoto had to fly to New York for the Bootcamp portion in two weeks, meant quite some time away from Enji. He had to just not get eliminated and go back home. Maybe by the end of this, he’d be fully independent. Know how to talk to people and the whole thing. 

He could do it. 

-x-

Things were tense. Shoto had made Enji both look good and bad. And he was being very passive aggressive to Shoto in the two weeks they were in the same place. Shoto’s siblings were proud of him, but less because he’d sung well and more because he’d made subtle digs at their father. He was the only one still living at home. His siblings had all left the moment they could, and Shoto supposed he was doing the same thing. 

But being the youngest sibling, the rest having cut off their father, made Shoto the last chance for Enji to have access to one of his children. Shoto was overworked and controlled for this reason. He was forced to take advanced classes and discouraged from socializing. He halfheartedly took music classes, but didn't really bother with them. 

He was so busy with trying to keep away from Enji and looking at past seasons of the X-Factor for context that he paid no attention to social media. He didn't have any in the first place, but he didn't notice how much his performance had blown up online. He had no idea. And that was for the best. 

-x-

Shoto had his suitcase and backpack on as he boarded the plane. Touya had set Shoto up with someone to meet him on the other side, so he had thrown Enji’s boarding pass in the women’s bathroom trash can so he could get away from him. The last few days he’d been awful. Controlling, yelling at Shoto for any little thing to disobey him. So, at this point, he was trying to escape him. Best to stay with the show as long as possible so he really didn't need to go home so soon. 

Enji dug around in his bag for his boarding pass, and as he frantically searched, Shoto slipped into the crowd, pulling a baseball cap on to hide. He made his way onto the plane, and into his assigned seat. First class, sitting tight and tense until the plane started to take off, without Enji on it. 

Shoto was ignoring his phone blowing up, and once it was time to put the phone on airplane mode, he didn't need to deal with his father’s abuse anymore. The texts were unhinged. Yeah, he didn't want to go back anytime soon. 

For most of the three hour flight, Shoto slept, utterly emotionally exhausted after walking on eggshells with Enji the last two weeks. When he landed, he called Touya, who had him call the man he set up Shoto to stay with as he tried to become something. Shoto was generally very stressed, because he finally blocked Enji’s phone number, and just felt… off balance and nervous. 

It was easy to find the man, Keigo, because he had a big poster with Shoto’s name on it. He had a friendly smile, wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses. “Hey, kid!” Shoto was sure this man was only a few years older than Shoto, and he was much taller, but wasn't too offended. 

“Hello. Thank you for helping me.” 

“No problem! Follow me,” Keigo said with a blinding grin. Shoto rummaged in his bag, making sure he had everything, even if it would be too late at this point if he didn't have everything, but no, he had everything he needed to continue on the program. “So, Touya fill you in?” 

“He said you are his long distance partner that I was unaware of.” 

“That’s me! I saw your audition, you have some real talent!” 

“Wow, you saw that?” Keigo turned around and lowered his sunglasses, looking shocked. 

“Shoto, that performance blew up. It’s the highest viewed audition from this season.” 

“Oh… really? I don't have social media.” 

“Oh yeah, people liked it a lot and have high hopes. Though a lot of the popularity comes from your general appearance and behavior. A talented, handsome, very awkward young man.” 

“I’m not awkward,” Shoto argued halfheartedly. 

“Also the fact Shouta Aizawa already seemed to take a liking to you. Big deal.” Shoto sighed. They took a cab to Keigo’s apartment, which was very nice and likely pretty expensive. “Do you know who I am?” Keigo asked. 

“Touya’s long distance partner.” 

“Yes, but do you know what I do?” 

“No, I don't.” 

“Right. Touya did say you spaced out hard about the outside world. I'm an actor.” 

“A good one or a bad one?” Shoto asked. Keigo snorted. 

“A good one, I’d hope! I don't have any Razzy awards,” he laughed. “Anyways, my apartment is a safe space from the public in case you blow up big while filming.” Shoto thanked him sincerely for his help. “No worries. Touya wouldn't set someone up to stay with me for a couple months if either of us would drive the other insane. The spare bedroom is right down that hall and to the left.” 

“Right. Thank you,” Shoto said, and picked up his suitcase and went to the spare bedroom. It was massive with its own bathroom. Touya had done so much for Shoto despite not seeing him for a long time. Maybe this was his apology for leaving him to live with Enji alone for the last four years after Natsuo left, too. 

It had been lonely and isolating. Shoto never wanted to go back. 

-x-

Keigo drove his own car to the place the Bootcamp would take place. It was basically a mid-sized hotel with performing areas, and it had been reserved for showings. None of the Bootcamp would be recorded live. Shoto was wearing his baseball cap, but he was still very recognizable, with the giant scar on his face and heterochromia. 

He was getting a lot of nasty looks from other contestants. That sucked. 

Keigo checked in with him as support, but left before he went into the room with every other contestant. “I’ll see you in a few weeks, kid.”

“Thank you,” Shoto said sincerely. Keigo smiled, winked, and then left. It was nice to know there was someone who would help him if he called. And he didn't need to risk meeting Enji outside, since they were not leaving the hotel until a few weeks had passed. 

Shoto turned around and ran straight into a much shorter guy his own age. Well, he barreled into Shoto. All of their things clattered to the floor. Both immediately apologized and bent forward to pick their things up, only to collide with each other’s heads, and fall on their asses like complete morons. 

A blonde teen also around the same age started to laugh at them, while others openly snickered. Shoto sat up, and grabbed his things, mostly unbothered. But the one who collided with him looked near tears, humiliated. Maybe this was a usual thing. “Are you okay?” Shoto asked, still sitting. The other hadn't stood up yet, so Shoto hadn't either. 

"I'm fine. I’m sorry for embarrassing you,” the freckled teen quietly said in shame. 

“It’s okay. I’m Shoto.” 

“Izuku…” then he looked up, and finally saw who he’d run into. “Oh! You're the - ohhhh…” 

“The oh?” Shoto asked. 

“The one who didn't care either way! You really aren't mad about - about this?” 

“It was an accident. And a little funny,” Shoto admitted. The remaining tension on Izuku’s face disappeared, and he smiled in relief. He was… pretty. Very pretty. “We should probably get up, now.” 

“Of course!” Izuku held out a hand to help Shoto up, which he accepted. They ended up walking to the room every other contestant was in together, and it felt a little safer to be with someone else. Izuku seemed awkward in a different way than Shoto, who was a quiet awkward. Izuku mumbled the entire time. It didn't bother Shoto at all, so he said nothing. 

While he already knew how this was going to be working, it was a relief to have everyone who passed the first auditions rounded up and explained what would be going on for the next six weeks. He had six weeks here, safe from Enji. That sucked, but was also fine. He was fine. Maybe the dust would settle by then. 

“So, we wake up at 5:30, have breakfast, then vocal lessons. Group sessions, private sessions, until lunch. Then more lessons. Then dinner, then more lessons. I hope we get a chance to get some exercise,” Izuku mumbled. That didn't sound very different from Shoto’s life already, so he was fine with that. He could adapt. It would just be singing lessons instead of school lessons. And no Enji still made it much better than at home. 

Shoto ended up following Izuku around all day. The whole process would start the next day. Shoto was a silent but calm presence. “Where are we going?” he finally asked. 

“I was following you!” Izuku cried. 

“But I was following you.” 

“Oh my god. We share the same brain cell.” 

“Must not be a very big one,” Shoto mused, earning peals of hysterical laughter from Izuku. Shoto smiled and scratched his cheek. “Um. Do you want to be friends?” 

“Yes! Oh, but we’ll be competition!” 

“Not for another six weeks,” Shoto reasoned. “Besides, if I don't make it far, I’ll still have made a friend,” he said, shy, worried the competition would be a dealbreaker. But Izuku just smiled a bit wider, and held out his hand to shake. 

“Then we’re friends.” Shoto shook his hand; it was a little sweaty, but soft. Then, the door they were standing next to opened, and the blonde guy who laughed at them earlier walked out in pajamas. 

“Ugh, you two again,” he groaned. “Listen, just cause your performance got a couple million more views than mine means jack shit!” 

“Okay. I’m Shoto.” 

“I know that! Everyone knows that!” 

“This is Izuku.” 

“Hello! You were Katsuki Bakugo, right?! Hizashi liked you!” 

Katsuki frowned, looking Izuku up and down critically. “I don't remember your audition.” 

“Ah, that’s kinda reasonable. The lady behind me bombed. She made a real impression and I was kinda forgotten, haha,” Izuku said scratching the back of his head. 

“Why are you in pajamas?” Shoto asked. “It's daytime.” 

“So? I wasn't planning on leaving my room until I heard you weirdos outside my door,” Katsuki said critically. “What are you even doing here?” 

“I was following him but he was following me so we ended up here,” Shoto said honestly and matter of fact, while only Izuku looked embarrassed, and hid his face in his arms. Katsuki just looked at them in stunned silence. 

“Wow, I don't need to worry about you two idiots being my competition at all, do I?” 

“Not for at least six weeks,” Shoto replied, unoffended. “Izuku, we should find our rooms.” Izuku nodded hastily, and started speed walking away. “Wait, there’s a map over there.” 

“Where?” 

“The way we came.” 

“Which way did we come from?” 

“Yeah. You're not a worry for me at all,” Katsuki said, and shut his door. 

It turned out he did need to worry about them because the roster that was emailed to them all with the list of who would be assigned to which vocal coach showed all three of them spending the next six weeks in the same vicinity. Even if their hotel rooms were far from one another. He met up with Izuku for breakfast, and everyone else seemed too nervous to glare at him for having his audition go viral. 

“Shoto!” Izuku called once he saw him standing by the entrance. “It's so early, I’m going to die.” Shoto wasn't that socially clueless, he knew he wasn't really going to die. 

“Let’s hope the food wakes us up a bit.” It was a buffet style, like most hotels, but they were allowed to take a lot of food. They both piled their plates up, and found the edge of an already full table. They barely fit at the edge, so they had to find somewhere else to sit if they didn't want their necks breathed down the whole meal. 

Everybody was cranky at what time it was, so they opted to eat in the hall, and balanced the trays on their knees. “So, got a supportive family?” Izuku asked. “Are they keeping in touch with you?” 

“No, I blocked my father for now. He was supposed to take me to New York, but I tossed his boarding pass in the trash so he couldn't come with me. My brother set me up with someone in New York to have my back if something goes wrong.” 

Izuku stared at him in shock and horror. “Oh. You said you lived a sheltered life. Did you mean… a-abusive?” Izuku whispered, whipping his head around to look if anyone was listening in. But there was nobody, and they weren't wearing mics or anything. 

“I guess. You're the first friend I’ve ever made, so that explains some of it,” Shoto mumbled. “My first rebellion was the audition. My dad made me come because he thought my voice was good. I was supposed to sing a different song, but I went behind his back to sing a song I chose. But he was extremely unpleasant the two weeks from the audition until the plane ride. My three siblings cut off contact when they turned 18, and I’m the youngest, so it wasn't great for me to be alone and the last one he possibly can have control of,” he explained. “I figured I have six weeks until I possibly have to see him, so hopefully stuff can mellow out during that time.” 

“Did… he ever beat you?” 

“Not for a long time. But he was really, really bad when I was little. He abused my mom so much she went insane. When I was five, she poured boiling water on my face because she thought I looked like him. After that, I never saw her again. I don't know what happened to her. We just never talk about her. I don't know if she’s dead or not,” Shoto explained. 

Izuku’s jaw was dropped, until he snapped his mouth shut. “W-well, maybe we could room together once we get out of here! Then you don't have to go back to him. We can find somewhere else.” 

Shoto’s eyes widened in shock. “But… you just met me? What if I’m actually a wacko?” 

“Like you said, we have six weeks to see,” Izuku said kindly, beaming. “And, I’m really sorry your parents are bad. My mom’s a single mom - we have nobody. My dad died a long time ago, so it was just us.” 

“Is she good to you? You like her?” 

“I love my mom a lot. My awkwardness kinda kept people from becoming my friend. So I was bullied a lot. So she’s protective of me.” 

“Thats surprising. You seem really smart and nice so far.” Izuku blushed up to his ears, smiling to himself. “Oh, we should probably start eating soon.” 

“Right!” The pair scarfed their food down just in time to be called to go to lessons. Izuku wasn't scared away by Shoto’s shitty childhood. This was a real friend, right? That meant, even if his voice sucked, Shoto would be encouraging. And he found out it, in fact, did not suck. 

A lot of people were “meh” but Izuku wasn't one of them. The boy’s group was mentored by Shouta Aizawa, so everyone felt super uncomfortable while singing; it was like he stared into your soul. He was also a lot harsher on TV than in the lessons. By the time they got to Shoto, everyone was feeling comfortable enough with him, but it was with each other that there was strife. 

Shoto really didn't know if he did well, but nobody laughed at him, so he took that as good. Izuku was beaming brilliantly. Shouta was smiling, too, and then moved on to the next. He was testing their range capabilities. And the only other man in the room who was able to go as high as Shoto was Katsuki, but his voice was a completely different experience from Shoto’s. Raspy and intense and harsh but still very nice to listen to. 

He smirked at Shoto and Izuku’s looks of surprise. 

Shouta pushed them hard. So much so that every single one of them left for lunch with their throats sore. “You were surprised, jackass,” Katsuki said, shoving his way in front of Shoto in the lunch line. 

“I didn't watch any of the other auditions,” Shoto replied. “I was surprised. By you and Izuku.” Izuku stammered something neither of them understood. “It sounds like you gargle rocks, but in a good way.” 

“Hah?! What the fuck kind of compliment is that?!” 

“I agree! What kind of rocks, do you think, Shoto?” Izuku asked, clearly mocking Katsuki. 

“A fancy rock. Like a geode or something.” 

“You two are fucking idiots.” 

“I thought we established that when we got lost yesterday.” 

“Oh, that made it clear you're both fucking dorks. But today… I can't rule out you being talent competition. I'm gonna surpass you so hard it’ll kill you dead,” Katsuki threatened. 

They ended up sitting together outside, and talked about the others in their group. It was mostly men in their twenties and thirties, and the three of them were the youngest, just barely out of high school. “That just makes us more durable.” 

“Our brains are underdeveloped. Do you think that’ll be to our disadvantage?” 

“Hah?” Katsuki barked at Shoto. 

“Brains aren't fully developed until twenty five.” 

“Nah, our brains are growing, while their clunky ass’s are declining. We’re better off.” Shoto hoped that was true. 

The second batch of vocal coaching had to do with a lot of breathing exercises. While Izuku couldn't hit the highest pitches, he was able to sing the longest notes, at least out of the three of them. Katsuki had the hardest time with breath control, but seemed fully ready to jump in to improve. 

By the time dinner came around, all of the men, regardless of how developed their brains were, were exhausted, and while they were hungry, they were also tired, so ate at a slower pace. They finally were released at 7 PM to go off on their own. Izuku immediately headed down to the gym, with Katsuki following, arguing that he was stronger than either of them. 

Shoto knew that was true of him, because he wasn't super into working out, but he didn't want to be alone, so he went with them. Well, they all changed clothes, first. And it looked like most people didn't end an exhausting day with a workout, because there were few people in the gym. 

Finding a vending machine attracted all of Shoto’s attention, and as Izuku and Katsuki competed with who could do more pull ups, Shoto ate an extra large Twix bar, sitting by the window. He could see the city lights from where they were. 

“Are you not going to work out, Shoto?” Izuku asked. 

“No. I’m already tired,” Shoto replied. 

“Are… are you eating a candy bar?! While we’re working out?” 

“The caramel in the candy bar is giving my jaw a work out. Shouldn't that count?” Izuku was horrified while Katsuki started laughing. 

“That does not count. You have to keep healthy, Shoto!” 

“I really don't think one candy bar is going to hurt me. I usually eat a very strict diet regimen.” Realization came across Izuku’s face; this was not the norm for Shoto. He relented, but threatened him with consequences if he ate sweets every single day. Shoto raised his bicolored eyebrows. “What kind of consequences?" 

“Hmm. I’ll have to think about that,” Izuku said, with a mischievous grin. Shoto didn't think it would be anything bad or painful. He ate his candy in peace, and they eventually headed back to their own rooms to decompress and sleep. Shoto took a long shower and collapsed into his bed. 

He smiled into his pillow. If Izuku didn't get tired of him, he had somewhere to go after all of this died down. Because he didn't really see himself becoming some super star. He wasn't super star material, which was what this show wanted to produce. 

-x-

It appeared Katsuki was a friend now, too, because they spent most of their days together. He bickered a lot with Izuku, while Shoto just existed, for the first time, content in some chaos. The quiet moments were peaceful, but the noise was also a good distraction. And they both seemed to like Shoto enough to keep him around. It felt wonderful. He had friends. And Shoto didn't plan on going home after this, so he wasn't going to say goodbye to them forever or anything. 

As long as he didn't mess things up with them. 

Days passed, and Shoto found himself enjoying his life for the first time. Singing was fun when he wasn't doing it alone and at the order of his father. Shouta had a lot of faith in him, it seemed. Shoto was of the idea that the man could tell he had a difficult upbringing. Just… the way he looked at him sometimes, it was like he was encouraging him in a different way than everyone else. 

It was nice, to have an adult seem to actually care about him, even if it was just trying to turn him into a professional music artist. 

A week in, they started having to harmonize with each other, and sang duets. Some people sounded awful together, and Katsuki was clearly working very hard to not laugh. But he wasn't laughing when he sounded like shit with everyone else, too. His voice didn't match with anybody, but he didn't seem too bothered by this. He wanted to go solo. 

Shoto dominated over the people he dueted with, while Izuku got lost with stronger voices. When it finally came to see if they were as compatible as singers as they were as strangers running into each other, Shoto was pleasantly surprised that he and Izuku sounded very good together. Shoto’s voice was stronger but Izuku’s was extremely complimentary. They grinned at each other.

“Katsuki, you try with them,” Shouta said bluntly. Katsuki seemed reluctant, but with a firm look, he acquiesced. They tried the same song, but Katsuki stepped in when he was told to, and he ended up fighting Shoto for dominance, and the three of them together were really powerful. 

The room was shocked, and Shouta grinned in a feral way. “I want to be a solo artist,” Katsuki said quickly. 

“We’ll see.” 

The blonde looked unhappy and worried. It was okay, Shoto and Izuku were both happy they sounded good together. Even without Katsuki. 

At lunch, they sat at the same table with a few of the girls, who seemed to be in the same situation as the trio. Three of four were fine being a possible group in the future, while the fourth wanted to solo. 

Shoto asked Izuku, “You want to be solo, right?” 

"I'm fine either way! As long as I like a bandmate. I wouldn't want to work with someone I didn't like. But I like you a lot! Singing with friends would be really fun.” Shoto smiled shyly. “How about you?” 

“I never really thought I’d even get this far, but it sounds fun.” Then he turned to Katsuki, who stiffened under the attention. “It’s cool if you want to go solo. I'm sure you can do it,” Shoto said, fully sincere. The blonde’s shoulders relaxed just a bit at the statement. “But why are you averse to a group?” 

“I barely know you two. Sharing my career with two near-strangers isn't a promising idea,” Katsuki said defensively. 

“Oh, that’s reasonable,” Izuku nodded. “Well, we have a month left. But if Shouta tells us we have to or we can't go forward, we’d have to make some hard choices.” Katsuki nodded, and said nothing more, while Izuku and Shoto talked about ideas, how both of them had never really tried serious song writing. And Shoto started to picture a future he actually looked forward to. 

-x-

They had a sleepover one night, staying in Katsuki’s since his room had the best view. They were playing with fire, staying up late when it was mandatory to get up at 5:30, but they just wanted one night of “normalcy”, though a sleepover with friends was anything but normal for Shoto. 

They had spare blankets and pillows on the floor while Katsuki was on the bed, and they watched a movie. Shoto fell asleep almost immediately, but when they woke up, it was clear both of his friends had stayed up later, as they consumed an alarming amount of coffee.

And their performance suffered. Shouta looked at them in disappointment. “What on earth is going on today?” 

“We didn't get much sleep,” Izuku admitted shamefully. 

“Why not?” 

“...” 

“We had a sleepover and watched a movie,” Katsuki sighed. 

“Shoto is fine.” 

“I fell asleep early in the movie.” 

“I see. You two, go sit down. You're out for the rest of today. I don't want you damaging your vocal cords.” The two walked to the chairs in the corner, heads bowed. Shoto realized quickly he enjoyed singing with Izuku far more than solo, even if he was still good at it alone. His friends moped in the corner all day, and vowed to have no more sleepovers if they had to get up early in the morning. 

During dinner, Shoto asked, “So, how was the movie?” and earned a middle finger from Katsuki, and a suffering sigh from Izuku. 

-x-

There was a lot of drama in week four. Shoto got sick after breakfast, vomiting his guts out in the toilet of a random bathroom on the first floor, while Katsuki tried to track down a doctor on set, of which there were few. 

Shoto was obviously exempt from any work that day, and Izuku and Katsuki stayed with him all day. He had blood taken when poison control came when Shoto just could not stop vomiting. It was very scary, especially when it became clear Shoto’s food had been spiked with Ipecac, resulting in every room being searched. 

By the end of the day, one of the men from their coaching group was arrested. Shoto spoke to police, but didn't want to press charges, because that was a headache he just didn't want to deal with. The guy was still taken out of the hotel in cuffs. 

Shoto recovered in a few days, but singing was out of the question for a few more. His throat was raw beyond belief. Thankfully, Izuku and Katsuki didn't stick with him the entire time, so they had some training time while Shoto just lounged around in his room all day, bored but taking advantage of the opportunity to rest. 

-x- 

Week five, things started to get real for everyone. Nervous, knowing they only had one week left until they knew whether they were staying or not. Shoto worried for himself, hoping that he and his friends either all passed or all didn't. He didn't want to part with them. But most people had improved a ton since the training started, so the quality had changed. He couldn't point at the same people as from the start that he didn't think would go far. 

And it became clear the trio were going to be paired together at the end. They started having sessions with Shouta after everyone else was done as a group. Shoto hoped Katsuki wasn't too upset. They did sound really good together, but it was a little more complicated to sing with three people than just a solo. They had to figure out which parts to sing. 

"I'm putting you three in a group,” Shouta announced to them at the end of a night session in the middle of the final week. “How do you feel about that?” 

"I'm good with that!” Izuku said excitedly, with Shoto nodding in agreement. They looked to Katsuki, who sighed. 

“Alright.” 

“Good,” Shouta grinned. “The three of you are all individually talented, but as a group, you excel. I expect great things from you three.” 

“Thank you,” Shoto said politely. Shouta nodded, and dismissed them. They headed to Katsuki’s room, and just sat on the bed and couch in silence, before Shoto spoke. “Sorry that this isn't what you wanted, Katsuki.” 

The blonde sighed, flopping onto his back on the bed. “It’s fine. I like you guys. Maybe being in a group will be fun. I don't know. We’ll see. Besides, we could all be fine on our own, probably. If the group breaks up later.” Shoto nodded. “Guess we need to come up with a band name.” 

“Oh, yeah!”

So, they brainstormed, trying to come up with some mix of their names that worked. But they were coming up short. Until Shoto looked at their reflections in the hotel window. “Traffic Light,” he said, interrupting Izuku’s babbling. 

“Hah?” Katsuki asked, baffled. 

“Our hair. We look like a traffic light.” Both of his friends and future bandmates looked stunned, before they started to laugh. Shoto wasn't sure if that was a yes, until they both vehemently agreed, absolutely loving it. 

In the morning, Traffic Light told Shouta their chosen band name, and for the first time in the last nearly six weeks, he laughed. “I love it. Alright, Traffic Light.” Shoto smiled. 

The week passed quickly, and soon they were due for their Bootcamp auditions, which would help the judges decide who was progressing to the next stage, the Judge’s Houses. Shoto was pretty confident Traffic Light would pass. He also was fairly sure of which of the guys would pass, considering the trio were now in the group category.

It was probably going to be Mirio, Shinso, Neito and Ken, who was the oldest. They were the best of them. All a couple years older than the trio, but still in their twenties. 

-x-

The day came to do their Bootcamp audition after all their training. Shoto was very nervous, as was Izuku, but Katsuki was sure they were going to kill it. Their chosen song was approved by Shouta, and he seemed pretty confident in their potential. They unfortunately didn't get to watch the other auditions, but that meant they wouldn't have an audience for their first real group performance. Which was good for now. But if they passed this, and the judge’s house, they’d be singing in front of massive crowds, on TV. 

That was very scary, but also, at the same time, Shoto wouldn't be alone during it. That was a relief. 

When they walked out onto stage, all the judges were happy to see them, pleased they’d become a group. They each had a mic, and when the music started to play, they did their very best. And while they clearly sounded very good together, their stage presence was not great. Especially Shoto, who stood in one spot the whole time while Katsuki was all over the place, and Izuku just shuffled around. 

But what mattered most for now was their sound. They could work on the rest of the performance later. 

“Good work, boys,” Hizashi praised. “You sound very good together.” 

They were not told if they passed or not, and left. “Our stage presence sucks,” Izuku said. “We gotta work on that.” 

“You both gotta work on it. I was fine,” Katsuki argued. “You both gotta learn to move around! Just standin’ still is boring as fuck.” 

“How’d you learn to move around like that?” 

“I can't stand fucking still for long.” 

“ADHD powered stage presence,” Shoto mused. Katsuki slapped his shoulder, and Izuku laughed. “Do you think we’ll pass?” 

“Yeah,” Katsuki said confidently. Shoto latched onto his confidence, and by the end of the evening, everyone had gathered, and were either cut or approved to move on. And Shoto’s prediction about the boy’s group was right. Katsuki’s prediction of their own status was also correct. 

They passed onto the next phase. 

And their mentor would not be Shouta this time, but Nemuri. She was working with the groups. Traffic Light was the only boy’s group this time. The rest were women, mostly in their 20s and 30s, but there was a surprise group of older women. Again, the trio were the youngest. 

Two of the groups auditioned together, while Traffic Light and Rainy Season were put together during Bootcamp. “Why Traffic Light?” Ochako asked while they were waiting to check out of the hotel. There would be a two week break before the Judge’s Houses, which Nemuri was in Barcelona. So Shoto was flying out of the country. 

“Our hair looks like a traffic light,” Shoto answered. Those in the vicinity who had passed laughed (the ones who hadn't were too morose to laugh) at the news. 

“I think it's great,” Izuku beamed. “So, your group gets along?” 

“Yeah! We made friends. It seems like you guys did, too.” 

“Yes, we became friends on day one. Day two for Katsuki.” 

“You guys sound good together?” Mina asked. 

“Hell yeah we do,” Katsuki bragged. 

“Our stage presence needs some work,” Izuku admitted with a bashful smile. 

“Oh, us too! I was all over the place, Tsuyu just stood still.” That was nice, they weren't the only ones who needed to work on that aspect. 

When they left the hotel, Shoto grew depressed quickly. Izuku and Katsuki would be returning to their homes until the next flight. “Are you staying safe somewhere?” Katsuki asked, filled in on Shoto’s shitty father. 

“I hope. Keigo might let me keep staying with him.” 

“Keigo Takami?” Izuku asked, shocked. Shoto nodded. “How on earth do you know him?” 

“My brother is his long distance boyfriend. I hope he’ll let me stay.” 

“You can come with me for now if you need to. Should call him first,” Izuku encouraged kindly. So Shoto did, but Keigo was already in the parking lot to pick him up. Shoto was allowed to stay with him until the next stage. Shoto was filled with relief, and the man seemed genuinely fine with Shoto staying with him. 

He hugged Izuku and Katsuki goodbye, planning on talking on Facetime as much as possible, and promised to see each other in two weeks. They would keep practicing on their own, and on video calls. 

Shoto was still very sad when they drove away. He’d miss them. He’d become so quickly attached to them both. 

They each texted once they’d gotten home, Katsuki taking the longest since he was the furthest. 

Shoto realized the only way they could stay in proximity was to make it in this, and become a band. So, his practice took center stage in the break. Keigo wasn't home much, so Shoto singing didn't bother him, and he was otherwise a good guest. 

When his siblings texted him, asking how it went, they were surprised but happy he’d made friends. 

Man, Enji’s gonna be pissed you’ll share the stage with two other people, Natsuo texted. 

You still have him blocked? Touya asked. 

Yes. I haven't been contacted since I blocked him on the flight. I don't want to speak to him. Plus, even if the band thing goes nowhere, Izuku offered to live with me as roommates in the future. 

That’s great, Sho! I'm so happy you made friends! Fuyumi said. 

Thank you, I am, too. I hope I don't have to see Enji for a long time. 

He got agreement emojis from his brothers, before the conversation ended for now.

Chapter Text

The trio did Facetime every night and sing, finding songs they thought they could do together well in case they got to choose for the Judge’s Houses. Not all of them were sung by multiple people originally, but they had a couple made for more than one person. Boybands were usually more than three people, so they were at an awkward amount when it came to finding previous music. Duets and four or fivesomes were the most common. 

Well, they’d make it work. 

Shoto missed them, but was very glad they kept in constant contact. They texted each other a lot, too. They still wanted to be friends with Shoto. Distance didn't sour everything. It was all okay. Shoto’s fears weren't warranted. 

-x-

Shoto’s first international flight was nerve wracking. He had a baseball hat and sunglasses on. His performance fame had died down, so he felt safer. The show wasn't airing currently, it wouldn't until the live performances started. Fuck, that was scary, too. But again, he wouldn't be all alone. 

When he landed, he knew a minimal amount of Spanish and made his way to the right place with a long car ride. He wished he could have met his friends at the airport, but it wasn't long until he could see them again. 

The house they were at was gigantic, big enough to house the four groups for now. Shoto stepped out of the car, and heard Izuku shout his name, he and Katsuki waiting on a bench by the front porch. Shoto beamed, and Izuku jumped him with a hug. He was nice and warm. But Shoto didn't hold onto him too long. "I'm so glad we’re all together again!” 

“Me, too,” Shoto said sincerely. “I missed you guys.” 

Katsuki rolled his eyes at their excitement. “Time to get to work again, huh?” Shoto nodded, and Izuku grabbed his suitcase while Shoto had his dufflebag. They headed inside, and found they would be sharing a large guest room, with bunk beds. Shoto was super excited to have a sleepover every night. 

Hopefully they wouldn't be up at 5:30 every day, even if they’d all gotten used to it eventually. The two week rest period was much appreciated, though. He just missed his friends, not the extreme routine. 

They explored the property, which was up against the beach. Katsuki had told Shoto to bring swim trunks, so if they had the free time, they could go into the water at some point. 

-x-

Without the hotel making food, it was up to the contestants to make their own meals, which they were informed of that night. Shoto had never really cooked for himself before, so he was immediately nervous. 

“Thank god,” was Katsuki’s response. Izuku and Shoto blinked at him in question. “I like to cook, and I’m fucking good at it.” 

Both of their eyes lit up in opportunity, and the blonde rolled his eyes. “Yes, I’ll cook for you two losers, too.” 

“Thank you!” Izuku cheered. 

Nemuri smiled at them all, and said, “You’ll be here for four days. I'll be picking which two of your groups will be continuing. I'll have you each perform alone and separately, and have interviews with each of you as well as you as a group. We’re trying to make super stars out of you. Not the kind that are jerks and don't deserve fame.” She winked, and Shoto felt very uneasy. 

Katsuki also looked nervous. They were released to have dinner, and Traffic Light would be evaluated first in the morning. At least they didn't need to stew in their nervousness for too long. They went to the kitchen, or one of the kitchens, the one they were welcome to use, and started on a dinner with the abundance of food they had there.

Katsuki made some spicy smelling dish, and served generous amounts to the three of them. “Now eat it and worship me,” he said cockily, starting on his own food. Shoto and Izuku shared a look, and then tasted the meal. It was delicious. “That’s right. Better than some rando hotel staff.” 

“When did you learn to cook?” 

“Been doing it since I was a kid. My dad thought it would help with my anger issues,” he admitted. “They did.” 

“Anger issues, huh?” Izuku mused. 

“I was a brat as a kid.” 

“It’s good you can reflect!” Shoto nodded in agreement. "I'm still surprised I haven't like, driven you guys away yet! You're my first real friends.” 

“Me, too. I don't really expect anything cause I don't know any different. And you’re fine with my weirdness,” Shoto offered in support. Izuku smiled at him. “And you put up with our oddities well enough.” 

“I guess. You're both… just genuine. I don't really see any ulterior motives, or anything underhanded. And you being openly weird is refreshing.” Izuku giggled, and Shoto smiled. They finished their food and left when the Rainy Season group came in. Shoto then realized just how early they’d eaten, but wasn't too bothered. 

The trio headed into their shared room, and Izuku said, “What are we going to say in the interviews?” 

“Don't we just want to be ourselves?” Shoto asked. 

“I mean, they’re probably gonna ask what we want to do long term. We’d want to be on the same page. I’d like for us to be good enough to not be voted out instantly, and get a contract of some sort. Performing is fun as shit. For me at least. You losers need to work on it.” 

Shoto nodded, knowing this. “That sounds fine. The more we perform the better and more relaxed we’ll get.”

“We’re all pretty different, I think that’ll work to our advantage,” Izuku said with a grin. “And… um, well, you're both very handsome. So we’ll have that going for us. Not that I really would care about that kind of attention, but I know how boybands usually go,” he rambled. 

“You're nice looking, too,” Shoto complimented. Izuku’s face turned bright red, and Katsuki snorted. 

“Gonna have to get used to having people leer at you.” 

“I don't think I was leering. I was being honest.” 

“Yeah, yeah I know, but blushin’ for dumb reasons is just gonna make people wanna press your buttons more,” Katsuki said, waving his hand dismissively. 

Izuku pouted and crossed his arms. “Well, I think Shoto will be the most affected by the fangirls.” 

“Why?” 

“Your looks and voice,” both of them said, Katsuki in a much more annoyed tone. Shoto scratched his cheek. 

“I’ve never been really flirted with or anything,” he admitted. “I don't think I've ever even really talked to a girl besides my sister.” 

“Bros before hos,” Katsuki stated. Shoto cocked his head in confusion. “Means each other comes before women.” 

“Oh. Okay,” he agreed easily. 

Katsuki nodded, satisfied, and leaned back on his bed. “So, what the hell we singing for the group audition… again.” 

-x-

The individual interviews were first, and Izuku and Katsuki both went ahead of Shoto. He was nervous, sitting in the hallway, cursing the expensive and thick walls of this mansion since he could hear nothing of their one on one time with Nemuri. 

Shoto was called in next, without seeing his friends. Nemuri was sitting at a long table, but not at the head of it. Shoto was meant to sit directly across from her. She already was smiling, so surely that was a good sign.

“Hello, Shoto.” Shoto nodded politely, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants. “I have some questions for you.” He nodded again. “What kind of artist do you want to be?” 

“I want to sing in a band with my friends. I don't really know what kind of music we want to make yet.” 

“I still really like your honesty,” she said, still smiling. “Do you think you and Izuku and Katsuki could handle the pressures of stardom without turning on each other?” Shoto frowned. That was an unpleasant thought. 

“Yes. I think we’ll be okay.” 

“You won't have total control of your music if you were to sign a record deal.” 

“I know. I did more research on how it all works. None of us are very good at song writing so far. Maybe we’ll learn better later, but it would be less stressful with some professional’s help behind the scenes and all.” 

She nodded, and flipped through some papers in front of her that Shoto just noticed. “You lived a fairly lonely life before this, didn't you? Few friends and family members?” Shoto frowned deeper. “Would you care to comment on your childhood?” 

“No, thank you. I thought this was about music?” Shoto said, brows furrowed. 

“Bingo! That was the response I was looking for. Can't have you blowing up at interviews. Well, two of three having reasonable responses was better than last season.” 

“So… it was a test?”

“Yes! When interviewers press on inappropriate questions, you want to shut them down professionally, even if they didn't behave professionally,” she winked. Shoto was a little startled, but nodded. He hoped they could just move on through this. “So, what do you think of your bandmates? You didn't come into this competition intending to be in a group act.” 

“Theyre my friends. We made friends before we knew we sounded good together. I think performing by myself would be lonely. And make me more anxious. They're really cool and nice, so I’m really happy to be sharing the stage with them.” He had a little smile on, thinking of performing with them, working with good friends making music. Nemuri’s smile dimmed just a little. Shoto noticed it, and looked questioning at the change in tune. 

“Well, I have high hopes for you three. Don't disappoint.” Shoto nodded, and started to leave, before he heard her heels clicking after him in a hurry. “Shoto, come here. Over here. And turn your mic off.” He blinked in surprise, but did as he was told, and followed her into a bathroom. A big bathroom, but still a bathroom. 

“I need to be brutally honest with you, hun.” Immediately, he was on edge. “Do you like either of them? Romantically?” Nemuri asked him very seriously. Shoto blinked in shock at the question. 

“I… I don't know. Why would you ask?” Shoto questioned, his face burning.

“The way you looked, talking about them. I'm not going to tell you that it is wrong to feel that way, but it will ruin your career.” Shoto felt like a bucket of ice water was dumped over his head. “So, you either need to not show your emotions, or play with fire and hide any relationship expertly. I would recommend the first option.”

“Okay,” Shoto mumbled. 

Nemuri looked regretful. "I'm sorry. I just see a lot of potential in you three, and wanted to give you some actually useful, if not unpleasant, advice.” She left the bathroom first, looking apologetic. Shoto left after her, and a lifetime of hiding his feelings finally came to use. 

If he let anyone know he even could feel that way about them, which he didn't know if he did, truly, then he could ruin all of them. 

Hopefully he never developed those feelings. Hiding his pain all his life hurt more than words could say. Shoto didn't know what hiding romantic love would feel like. 

-x-

When he got back to the shared room, it had been half an hour since his interview. He’d gone on a short walk around the property, just letting everything sink in. He was better prepared now. So, since he knew it was a bad idea to develop any feelings like that, he wouldn't. It should be easy to avoid that kind of thing knowing ahead of time that it was a bad idea to do so in the first place. 

“You've been gone awhile,” Katsuki commented. 

“I went on a walk,” Shoto said, kicking his house slippers off by the door. Izuku was immediately asking if his interview went badly. “No. It was just… I don't know. It went fine. I don't think I did poorly.” 

“Then what’s with being all morose?” Katsuki asked sharply. Shoto shrugged. “You're not gonna tell us?” 

“Probably not.” 

“Okay,” Izuku said, sending the blonde a stern look. “Is it something that we’re gonna maybe see aired on TV later?” he asked kindly, so kindly. 

“No. She made sure of that.” 

“That’s even more ominous!” 

“It’s not bad. Can you just drop it?” Shoto sighed. Katsuki instantly silenced, but both of Shoto’s friends were looking worried. Really, he wasn't even sure why he was so sad. He didn't love either of them like that. Maybe it was just the fact, if he did turn out being gay, he’d ruin everything for them. Maybe he should warn them, too. He didn't know their preferences. But they weren't dumb and clueless like Shoto. Surely they knew?

No, better to be upfront and warn them. “None of us can be gay,” Shoto blurted bluntly. Both of them just stared at him, openly confused. “I guess I came off as a little gay, and Nemuri took me aside and said anyone knowing I was gay would ruin us.” 

Katsuki’s face grew red, and Shoto thought it was embarrassment, but it was fury. “Why the fuck would she tell you that?!” 

Shoto blinked in surprise at the reaction. “She said she has high hopes for us, and wanted to give a fair warning.” 

“Why did she think you were - were gay?” Izuku asked, stuttering a bit at the end. 

“I don't know. I don't even know if I’m gay,” Shoto said honestly. “But neither of you came across as gay, so I guess I’m the possible bomb or something,” he shrugged, but his face didn't convey casualness. Izuku rubbed his shoulder in sympathy. 

He gave Shoto a supportive smile, and said, “If it makes you feel any better, I’m bisexual. If you end up crushing on another guy, we’ll keep it a secret!” Shoto nodded, deciding not to tell them the whole truth - it wasn't just that Shoto possibly being gay would ruin everything. Being gay for them was the biggest no-no.

The group interviews came a day later, but they weren't first this time. The group portion was a lot less uncomfortable, at least. 

“So, Traffic Light. Who came up with the name and what does it symbolize?” Nemuri asked with a little laugh.

“I came up with it because I looked at us in the window when we were trying to come up with a name. Our hair looks like a traffic light, ignoring the white in my hair,” Shoto answered. “They thought it was funny, so now it's our band name.” 

She laughed again. “Love it! You three were put together in the Bootcamp session, when all of you planned on being solo. Positive or negative feelings on that?” Shoto didn't see why anyone would answer negatively to that question. Izuku answered positively for them, though, which was the honest truth. 

“We made friends in the first week! Before we knew we sounded good together. So it was easier to be paired with only near strangers, not complete strangers.” 

“How’d you meet?” Nemuri asked conspiratorally. Shoto answered that he and Izuku ran into each other and fell down while Katsuki laughed at them. “Haha! What a meeting!” Katsuki sent Shoto an annoyed look. “What was the decision to move forward as a group like?” 

“I wanted to be solo at first. They were cool with being a group when it ever became clear we  might all be paired together. But eventually, I liked them enough to trust they wouldn't make my professional life hell,” Katsuki explained bluntly. “Besides, we do sound hella good together,” he added with a cocky smirk. Izuku giggled, and Shoto smiled peacefully. “Just you wait, we’re gonna kill the live shows.” 

“Once I’m better at not standing perfectly still,” Shoto commented. 

“Don't argue with my confident statement!” 

“There’s nothing wrong with needing to improve on yourself.” Izuku just laughed. Their interview was over on a positive note, since Nemuri seemed to really like them. And Katsuki and Izuku didn't let on that they were annoyed with what she told Shoto in private. But to a degree, he did appreciate her telling him early. So he wasn't angry. Sad, yes, a little. But not angry. It wasn't a dealbreaker, anyways. He wasn't in love with either of them regardless. 

The performance section was later that evening. The three of them had been practicing with this song over video call and once they arrived at the house. The walls were thick enough to not bother anyone else by practicing in their room.

They even choreographed a little bit, just so Shoto didn't stay perfectly still. They were outside, on a gazebo. It was a little weird, to sing and move at the same time, but Shoto didn't think they were terrible. Well, their singing was good. The movement was alright, in his eyes. 

Nemuri’s eyes were bright and vibrant, a grin on her face. “Fantastic!” The trio shared glances and grins. “You’ll know by the end of the night whether you're going to the live shows.” 

They headed to the kitchen, and Katsuki said, “We're making it to the next section.” Shoto couldn't help but agree with his confidence. 

-x-

They did indeed make it to the live shows, along with Rainy Season. Their group really seemed to have chemistry as well, so they were true competition. They were also all really nice. Ochako, Mina, Tsuyu and Toru. So there was a girl band and boyband, both formed during the competition. 

They packed their things and were heading straight to the contestants’ house, where they’d be staying for the rest of their time on the show. They went to the airport together, on the same flight, and were headed straight to the next location. No long break between sections. They were on camera most of the time outside of their room, but they’d be performing live in front of so many people, and there were stakes now. 

The first time Shoto performed in front of a crowd, he hadn't cared what they thought of him. But now he did, and they would be voting who got to stay and who didn't. One slip up and they were toast. He was nervous, antsy. 

“What’s up?” Izuku asked, sitting between Shoto and Katsuki in the middle seat. Katsuki had the window seat. 

"I'm nervous about the live shows. When I performed the first time I didn't care either way. Now, I don't want to lose.” 

“Heh, well said. We’re not gonna lose,” Katsuki replied with a nasty, sharp grin.

“If we do get voted out, can we still stay friends?” Izuku asked. Shoto felt a little better he wasn't the only one with that worry. 

“I want to,” Shoto answered. 

“We’ll form our own YouTube band, do it as a side hustle while going to school or some shit,” Katsuki agreed. Both Shoto and Izuku’s faces lit up in relief. Katsuki rolled his eyes, a little blush on his face. Shoto felt much better after getting confirmation everything wasn't over if they got voted out early. 

They were grabbing their luggage when Shoto’s phone buzzed. It was Keigo. Shoto read the message, and while he didn't think his face changed at all, the color did drain from it. Katsuki noticed easily. “Yo, what’s up?” 

“My dad is at the airport somewhere.” Izuku pulled his hoodie up over his head, and put it on Shoto, pulling up the hood. 

“What’s wrong?” Toru asked. 

“Shoto’s shitty dad is here and that’s not great.” She pulled off her own sunglasses and handed them to Shoto. 

“Hold up! He needs more,” Ochako insisted, and pulled him into a small hallway, and the brown haired young woman dabbed concealer over Shoto’s very obvious face scar to hide it. Tsuyu pulled his bangs out of his face with bobby pins, so he wasn't as easily recognizable with the hood up. 

Then, they walked him out in a protective circle. Shoto was terrified, he knew Enji would be furious, and cause a scene. Shoto didn't want any of it caught on camera. He walked with his head down, one of Katsuki’s shirts wrapped around Shoto’s luggage to hide the familiar suitcase from the man who’d bought it in the distant past. 

And Shoto saw him, but he didn't notice them. He probably didn't expect Shoto to have made any friends, given he never learned how to be social with his isolation and sheltered childhood. When they got into the two cars, Shoto sagged in his seat, feeling so very tired. Izuku rubbed his arm. 

“I saw him, but he didn't notice us,” he sighed. “Thanks. The girls were nice, too, to help.” 

“I hate to admit it, but they're good people. I'm gonna feel bad crushing them under us as we climb to the top,” Katsuki said, a little snappish. “You okay?” 

“I know he’s so, so mad at me. I don't think he’d do anything to derail our success because no matter if he’s involved, if I become successful, he’ll still be able to claim some responsibility. I don't want to see him, and especially not be alone with him. I'll need to speak to him eventually… Maybe when things are settled at the contestants’ house I can have a phone call with him and my siblings,” Shoto said quietly. 

Katsuki huffed, and grumbled, “Well, good thing about being in a band, it's all three of our choices - and the manager or whatever - so he’s way less likely to assume any control over shit instead of it just being you.” Shoto nodded silently. “Hey. Don't worry about it, we’ll have your back.” Still, he was embarrassed. “That dickhead’s not touching you as long as we’re around.” 

“I took Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu if that helps.” The image of Izuku wrestling Enji on the ground startled a laugh out of Shoto. Izuku’s face lit up, but he looked playfully offended. 

"I'm sure you're very good at it, but he’s 6’5 and like, 250 pounds. I don't know how that would go,” Shoto replied.

“Hey, that’s the point of Jiu-Jitsu! Not to overpower, but subdue. I just need to get him on the ground and then I can take him out,” Izuku said confidently. Shoto ducked his head, smiling. Who thought doing what his father had intended for him, and he had no intention of taking seriously, would actually make him real, loyal friends who appreciated Shoto’s awkward quirks. 

He felt like crying, but managed to just smile to himself instead. 

Once they were at the mansion to house them and the other contestants, Shoto found a private area in the backyard and called his siblings. It was just him, with everyone else unpacking their things. The groups were in shared rooms, but that was fine with Shoto. Katsuki was very clean, Izuku was the only one of the three who used the floor as a hamper, so they wouldn't mix up their things. 

Shoto called all his siblings on a video call. All three were very excited to see him. He smiled tightly at them. “Hello. I’m at the contestants’ house right now. My group made it through to the live shows.” 

Fuyumi squealed in excitement. "I'm so proud of you, Sho!” 

“Your group still good?” Natsuo asked. 

“Yes. They're wonderful people. I’m sure you’ll all like them.”

Touya smiled at him in sympathy, but also pride and guilt. “You calling about Enji?” 

“Yes. He was at the airport. Some of my fellow contestants acted quickly with Keigo’s warning and disguised me so he didn't recognize me. I have him blocked currently. I don't know what to do. I think I need to speak with him,” Shoto explained. His siblings looked nervous or apprehensive, but also agreed that Shoto needed to speak to their father that he ghosted nine weeks ago. 

He was no doubt furious. So, Shoto asked, meekly, if they would stay on the call with him, and not make him do it alone. His wording brought looks of guilt and shame across their faces. They had left him alone with Enji for years for their own freedom. And while Shoto didn't hate them for it, and was used to being alone, it wasn't great. It wasn't the best thing they could have done, to abandon him to an increasingly more controlling father. 

But, Shoto felt like he had been saved. Saved by two complete strangers that he might spend a very important chunk of his future with. He made friends. He made acquaintances, too, who helped him when they stood to gain nothing from it. So, he wasn't completely broken and soiled. He could be someone other people cared about. 

A deep, deep relief. He would be alright. 

-x-

It was the same night that Shoto and his siblings planned to call Enji. After dinner, he told his friends he was going to be making a family phone call, and not to wait up for him. 

“Want us to come with you?” Izuku asked in concern. 

“No, my siblings will be on the call as well. I won't be alone.” Izuku still looked worried, but nodded. Katsuki was glaring, but not directed at Shoto. He went back out to the backyard, making sure there were no cameras around, and he didn't have a mic on, so he was fairly sure he was safe to have a private moment. The show was a reality TV show, but they wanted to make a successful star/stars out of it, so Shoto didn't really know how airing family drama would help Shoto’s cause. Maybe he was naive, but where else was he supposed to go? 

Shoto unblocked Enji, and waited in the gazebo far from the main building and out of the view of any bedroom windows. He was more likely to get murdered out here than spied on from the main house. 

Touya called him, and Shoto knew this was it. What he’d been avoiding for over two months. Shoto answered, and saw the small faces of his family in the corner of his phone screen. Enji was stone faced. 

“Hi,” Shoto said meekly. 

“You're done ignoring me, then?” Enji asked coldly. 

“I got into the live performances. So I won't be coming home yet. Or… or soon, really. I met some people, and we’re gonna stay together even if we get voted out-” 

“Are you going to apologize for throwing my boarding pass out and abandoning me at the airport? Or are you just going to pretend you didn't do something so utterly childish and selfish?”  

Shoto averted his eyes. He wasn't going to apologize. He was done bending over backwards to avoid his father’s anger. He couldn't get here. "I'm not going to apologize for that, no.” Touya and Natsuo’s tiny faces lit up while Enji snarled. “I would never have gotten this far if you were breathing down my neck the entire time.” 

“Gotten far? I’ve heard you would have gotten nowhere without the presence of two complete strangers! On your own? What a joke.” 

"I'm happy to be in a group. That’s not an insult to me, I’m having more fun doing it with friends than I would have doing it to please you,” Shoto replied, even if his voice was shaking from nerves of all of this. 

“I made you what you are today-!” 

“No, you didn't. You never let me have friends. You never helped guide me into people enjoying my company. You didn't give me my voice. Everything I’ve done since ditching you has been on my own merit. I’d appreciate it if you got used to me not crediting you for every small bit of good in my life and future.” 

Enji was speechless, stunned that Shoto talked back to him. Maybe because he had distance, he didn't live with him right now - and hopefully never again. He wasn't in physical danger or discomfort. 

“Are you disowning me, too?” 

“I don't know. For now, I don't want to see or talk to you, though. I want independence, to do this on my own. If I get voted out instantly, or I stay until the end, it won't change that I no longer want to live in the house.” 

Enji glowered. His last remaining shred of relevance to their “family” was drifting away, too. "I'm going to go, now.” 

“Love you, Sho,” Touya said, voice full of pride and warmth. 

“Love you guys, too.” 

“Good luck on TV! And tell your bandmates we say hello,” Fuyumi said sweetly. Shoto nodded, and hung up. He slipped his phone into his pocket, and curled his hands around the gazebo railing, bending forward, and just breathing, in and out, watching his breath puff in front of him. That was both very difficult, and easier than he expected. He’d been the most obedient child. He’d had nobody but his father, no way to escape, nobody to save him. 

So much had changed in such a short amount of time. And, in a few months, those changes might get even bigger. But, no matter how Traffic Light fared in the live performances, he had a chance of freedom and happiness through friends. 

When Shoto finally returned to his room, he was exhausted emotionally. It was past midnight, but his friends didn't listen to him, and were still awake, clearly waiting for him to come back. He’d made a smoothie in the kitchen and had just sat and processed it while slowly drinking it. Both of them looked questioningly at him. 

“It went alright,” Shoto sighed, and flopped onto his bunk bed. “I told him I didn't want to see him again, and that nothing I’ve done since ditching him at the airport was his own merit and that no matter how far I go in the competition, I don't want to live with him again,” he said into his pillow. He felt his bed shift as Izuku sat next to his head. Shoto turned onto his side, and saw his friend’s green eyes blazing with pride. The look sent a blush spreading up Shoto’s face and into his hairline. 

“You did so well, Sho,” Izuku said quietly, absolutely beaming. 

“It was uncomfortable. I needed some time to calm down after. I made a smoothie.” 

“Still, you did it. Been dependent on him up until two months ago. Huge fucking improvement,” Katsuki said, also grinning proudly. 

“Only thanks to you guys. If I didn't have something to do, or somewhere to go after this, I couldn't have done it. If I was going back to live in that awful house with him on his dime, I’d still be a caged bird.” 

“The safety net is thanks to all of us, but everything you did tonight was your own actions,” Izuku insisted. 

“He looked down on me for being in a group act, but I’m much happier with you two at my side. So I shut him down.” 

“Well, if he won't be proud of you, my mom will be proud of you.” 

“Same, my mom and dad are gonna love you. Far better behaved than me,” Katsuki said with a teasing grin. 

“Uh oh, are people going to come out of the woodwork to slander you?” Izuku asked, also teasingly, but Katsuki’s smile disappeared. He looked away, shame blooming across his face. “Katsuki?” 

“In elementary school, I was a bully. I was kicked out of one school. Was put in therapy, got better. I just hope that nine years old is young enough that it won't be held against me. I wrote letters of apologies to the kids I bullied. I don't know. I'm sorry if drama does come up about me,” he admitted, hands balled in his lap, sharp brows furrowed. 

“You stopped being a bully as a kid?” 

“I stopped being a bully as a kid. I didn't have many friends because I was snappy in junior high. In high school I had a couple friends but not in the sense that we stayed in contact at all after graduating.” 

“Then it should be fine. I’ll defend who you are, now,” Shoto said. Katsuki’s face turned even more red, and he nodded sharply. "I'm tired. Sorry for keeping you up. I told you not to wait up.” 

Both Izuku and Katsuki were already in pajamas, but Shoto wasn't, so he went to his bag and changed into sleeping clothes. They’d been changing in front of each other fine at the judge’s house, so Shoto felt it was fine. Though, that had been in a much bigger room. The room they were sharing was much more cramped. 

He pulled his shirt over his head, kicked off his pants and then pulled over a loose shirt and basketball shorts. When he turned back to his bed, he caught Katsuki jerking his head away so Shoto didn't see him looking. He was looking. Why? Shoto didn't dare ask, though, and managed to fall asleep with complete ease. It had been a tiring evening. 

-x-

Breakfast was cereal. Some good, expensive cereal, but still cereal, much to Katsuki’s ire. And Shoto finally noticed something about Izuku, a mannerism he thought had to do with nerves or antsiness. He rubbed his wrists and fingers. After he was done with his cereal, he started rubbing the hand that had been holding the spoon.

“Izuku?” 

“Hmm?” 

“Why do you rub your hands?” Shoto asked quietly, in their small corner. The house was cramped with all the people. Seven people from the groups, four soloists from both the girls and boys, and four over 28s, the older people. All in one house. It was a little cramped, no matter that the house was a mansion. 

Izuku hunched his shoulders immediately. Shoto started to take back his question and back off, before Izuku let out a deep breath and relaxed his posture. So Shoto stayed silent. “I have Juvenile Idiopathic Arthritis in my fingers.” 

“Arthritis?” Shoto asked in surprise. He’d never heard of someone young having arthritis. 

“Yeah. It comes and goes. I’ve had it since I was twelve. It usually gets worse for me when I’m stressed. Why I can't really reliably play instruments.” Shoto frowned to himself. 

“Will it go away?” 

“For a lot of people, it does go away. But for me, it usually comes back, so I don't get my hopes up anymore. Heat helps a lot, and I take pain killers when it's at its worst.” 

“I'm sorry, Izuku.” 

“Yeah. It sucks, but it is what it is, y’know? I don't want you or Katsuki feeling bad about it for me, though!” 

“Why hide it?” Katsuki asked, frowning himself. 

Izuku ducked his head. “Its embarrassing. I'm not even twenty and I have arthritis. Not even from an accident or anything. Just bad luck.” 

“If we perform, we’ll make sure to get those ear piece mics so you don't have to hold something for a long time,” Shoto assured, earning a really soft, gentle smile from Izuku. Prettier than his big giant grins. 

“Or we’ll get super expensive mics that warm your hands,” Katsuki added. “When we’re super stars, we’ll be able to afford it.” Izuku laughed, warm and happy. Shoto looked forward to that. 

Chapter Text

Going back on live TV was nerve wracking this time because, again, Shoto felt there were stakes now. Personal stakes. The contestants were driven to the performance center made for the show. And there were crowds outside already, but they all were brought inside before it became a Thing. And it would become a Thing with a capital T. 

Shoto had sent a group photo of himself, Izuku and Katsuki together to his siblings, and Fuyumi’s reply was: oh goodness. Be prepared, Sho. You guys are going to have SO MANY FANGIRLS. And she’d sent him enough One Direction fan clips that had Shoto sweating. 

So he knew it would be a Thing. All three of them did. 

Shuffled inside, they were immediately all separated to be taken care of by hair and makeup. And outfits. Shoto’s dresser tutted over his hair. “It’s so 2010s. Just a mop on your head.” 

“I don't think I’d look good with a buzzcut.” 

“There’s a lot of in-between between a mop and a buzzcut. You'll soon have stylists assigned to you.” She did some makeup on him, but it was difficult to cover his face because of his scar. He was insecure about it, but it was nice that she didn't comment on covering it up. It looked like a port wine stain, not a burn scar, so there was no tragedy to be fished out about it too easily. His siblings and father wouldn't tell anybody about it. 

And he didn't think Katsuki or Izuku would either. They were the only outsiders aware of the Todoroki tragedy. The tragedy that started long before Shoto was disfigured. 

When he met back up with the other acts, it was clear the women were much more doled up by makeup than the men. Shoto was glad he wouldn't sweat anything off on stage, so they were lucky. 

“They wanted to cut my hair,” Izuku said. 

“My stylist called my hair a mop,” Shoto said in consolidation. 

“I like your hair! It’s fine.” 

“I like your hair, too. I like how all of us have really different types of hair,” Shoto agreed. Izuku was flexing his hands, and Shoto wished his hands were super warm so he could warm them up, but he usually had colder than average skin, especially his hands. He’d be of no use. 

They were getting glares from the other men, which Katsuki returned in full force. Shoto just averted his eyes. They were especially getting glares from Ken Takagi, which was generally unpleasant, and Shoto was unsure how far he’d get in with his rude personality. He didn't have the charm that Katsuki’s gruffness carried. 

“Alright, everyone, come out as you're called. You’ll be asked a few questions by the judges, and then come back off the stage that way.” They all nodded in varying degrees of nervousness. 

The groups were saved for last, both young groups pacing back and forth. Rainy Season went off first, and Shoto wished he could hold hands with his group members in solidarity like girls could. But he had read that men holding hands was different than women, which didn't seem fair, but it was the world’s rules, unfortunately. 

Then, they were ushered out, and shared one look of resolve with one another, before walking out to immense cheering. Shoto worked very, very hard to relax his gait, and soften his resting bitch face. He knew he still looked stiff, but he was better than the first time he walked in front of a crowd. 

The judges all looked very happy to see them, but they could be performing for the cameras. Three mics on stands were set out for them, and Shoto stood in the middle of them. 

“Good afternoon, boys.” They said hello, or nodded. “Traffic Light,” Shouta said with a laugh. “You’ve come a long way since your separate auditions. How are you feeling about being a group?” 

“Good!” Izuku cheered. 

“I’m satisfied,” Shoto said calmly. 

“It’s cool. They're good people,” Katsuki stated gruffly. 

Shouta looked at the tallest of them once more, and asked, “Shoto, the first time you stood on stage, you didn't care either way. How do you feel, now?” 

“I want us to win,” Shoto answered, earning another eruption of mostly female sounding cheers. 

“What changed?” 

“When I auditioned, I was doing it to fulfil familial expectations. Now I want to win for me and my friends.” More cheers and clapping. Shouta looked at the other two, and asked the same. They answered in the general same way, Izuku much more chipper, and Katsuki with his sharp, challenging grin. 

“Well, we look forward to seeing more of you three!” They headed off stage, Izuku offering the crowd a shy wave, and then hurrying up off stage, while Shoto walked at a steady pace. 

Their time on the show for that episode was very limited, but the rest of the day was spent filming the clips that would show multiple times. Like the intro to each contestant. The trio were told to be themselves, Shoto was not asked to smile. He had an idea they wanted to showcase the wide range of personality between the three of them. 

There were small interviews, but luckily they didn't try to dig into Shoto’s family life and past. They did mention he had no online presence, and he really didn't. Zero social media and an email that had nothing to do with his name. 

It was kind of exhausting, so once they got into bed that night, Shoto passed out immediately. 

Then, the real work began, and the glimpse into the three’s future with the public became apparent. 

-x- 

Shoto woke up to noise outside. Izuku was across from him with a pillow over his head, awake and looking annoyed. Shoto blinked in exhaustion and looked out the window, looking between the curtains. A crowd of people outside, many holding signs with Traffic Light on them. Fangirls. The first of many. 

“It’s bad,” Izuku said sagely. “They have posters of all three of us.”

He seemed shocked by this. “I told you you were handsome, too,” Shoto stated, earning a blush. Katsuki was managing to sleep through it all, somehow. Though the two were speaking softly to not wake him up. They got dressed, and quietly talked about past performances until Katsuki woke up, and then they headed down for breakfast. 

“Based on what’s going on outside, you three are so gonna get stalkers,” Neito sneered at Traffic Light. 

“Izuku knows Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. He’ll protect us,” Shoto replied. Ochako choked on her food in a laugh. Izuku flushed and stammered awkwardly until he snapped his mouth shut, while Katsuki was grinning in amusement. 

“Did you know there are cameras in our rooms?” Rumi asked, one of the above 28s. 

“I guess nobody should masturbate while here,” Shoto said bluntly, earning more stifled laughter. Katsuki just openly erupted into laughter, and Shoto smiled to himself. It was nice, making people laugh because he said something amusing and not embarrassing.

Soon enough, it was time for their mentors to introduce them to their vocal coaches, and tell them what theme they were going for that week. The three headed into the room with Rainy Season, and were given their prompt, with the vocal coaches for each team having a list of music to choose from. 

The theme was a mean one to have for the very first live performance. A power ballad. Their vocal coach was a very tall man, with many tattoos. Yawara. He recommended Rolling In The Deep, which the three were fine with. So, training started. And Shoto had a lot of fun with it. 

-x-

Nobody shared what song they were doing with one another, so it would all be a surprise when they performed. Most of the contestants were not insufferable, barring Neito, Ken and the only unpleasant woman so far, Intelli Saiko. What a know it all, rude person she was. 

At some points they were forced to go out and interact with the fans camped outside of the house, making a lot of noise. Shoto didn't enjoy it, but it was a necessity to learn how to interact with future (and present) fans. They signed autographs and took photos. Izuku was the most charismatic of the three, and though many latched onto Shoto, they liked Izuku the most by the end, at least by personality. He smiled the whole time, nervous but happy to interact with people. 

Shoto and Katsuki were awkward and stiff. But Shoto was glad Izuku was well liked. He was on a high the rest of the day. 

They Facetimed with their families, ate dinner, and passed out, exhausted. And the next day, it started all over again. 

-x-

Part of their training included choreography and stage presence. They weren't expected to move a ton until later in the show when their breathing got better, and they were more used to performing in front of a giant crowd on a giant stage. 

The week passed quickly, and soon they were in the cars heading to the venue. Izuku was very antsy, his hands hurting, so he had hand warmers in them for now. They’d asked for ear mics, and were allowed for them. Shouta personally requested them after Izuku confessed the reason why. Shouta was the group mentor, even if he wasn't their vocal coach. He was kind of their manager while on the show. 

When they were in the back rooms, the three were dressed in three pieces, and they looked very nice. Thankfully, their hair was not criticized this time. Shoto discretely looked his bandmates up and down - they looked very handsome. He caught Izuku looking at Shoto through the mirror, but made no show of it. 

It wasn't gay to think your guy best friends were hot. Perfectly normal friend things. Shoto assumed. 

Backstage, they watched each performance, and the judging was mostly gentle this time, for their first performance. The only one before Traffic Light went up that was criticized was Intelli for coming across as incredibly cocky and full of herself the entire performance. And while none of them were awful, it was clear who was a weaker performer. Shoto was very glad he wasn't going to be on that stage all alone. 

Then, halfway through the roster of candidates, Shoto’s group was called. Their mics were clicked on, and they shared a nervous but excited glance. It gave Shoto a little more confidence that they were smiling, too. Even if they sucked, and were voted off after one performance, it would be a memory for the rest of Shoto’s life. 

The music started, and they walked out with confidence. Izuku was too far from the audience for them to see his hands were shaking. They had been taught what to do with their hands since they were not holding microphones. 

This song wasn't really a song to dance to or move about the stage too much, but they did part, making space between them during the performance. And Shoto could feel how much he’d improved since his last live performance. His voice was stronger, more confident, and he wasn't glued to one spot the entire time. He also could feel his face making at least some expressions. 

He was thrilled at how good their combined vocals sounded at the chorus and powerful parts. They each had a couple solo verses, but all came together with the strongest moments. By the end, Shoto was hopped up on adrenaline to the extreme. 

The audience screamed and cheered, and Shouta looked beyond smug. So, he thought they did well. And maybe he was thinking his decision to put them together was definitely the right decision, and Shoto agreed with that thought. They were meant to be on stage together. Solo, they’d be fine, but together they were really good. 

At least, that’s what Shoto thought. He’d see if that was true next week. 

Nemuri spoke first. “Boys, you have the absolute looks of a sensational boyband. Just based on your performance two weeks ago, you’ve improved drastically, especially in your stage presence. I’m still stunned you were three strangers a couple months ago. Your chemistry on and off stage is beyond endearing. I have extremely high hopes for you.” 

“Thank you,” they said, grinning, having trouble staying still. 

Hizashi then gave his opinion. “The versatility of your voices, individual and together, I think will be able to tackle many styles. Wonderful performance!” 

Kan said, “When you three walked on stage for your auditions, none of you carried the confidence you had during tonight’s performance. Impressive improvements.” The three nodded, sharing smiles with each other. 

Shouta leaned back in his seat. “I think putting you three in a group was one of the smartest decisions I’ve ever made. Keep up the good work and you’ll go far.” 

The host, Shinya, stated the number to vote them for, and the trio walked off stage amid more cheers. 

They collapsed into some of the chairs backstage, taking their mics off, and just letting all the adrenaline flood out of their bodies and into exhaustion. There was a TV showing the stage performance, and they watched their fellow group perform. They sounded really good, too. Shoto didn't think either of them would be voted off this week. 

After the last performance, they were shuttled back to the house, and some didn't even make it to their rooms before passing out on the couches. 

-x-

They only had to wait three days to find out who was eliminated. It was both good and bad there was basically no time to really see who would be voted off by social media opinion, if that was even a reliable way to know. 

Everyone was antsy and scared to be voted off, and Shoto wished he could hold his friends’ hands like the girl’s group did, but he just shoved them in his pockets instead. They were very sweaty. 

But, it was Tsutsutaka who was voted off. Traffic Light made it through. Thank goodness. If they got voted off the first week, that would have been so disappointing. Onto week two they went!

-x-

Izuku and Katsuki kept up with social media, and since Shoto had no account, he was shown memes and reels about them through his friends. Izuku’s social media was already privated, and Katsuki quickly privated his own once they moved on from the judge’s house. 

There were already pages dedicated to fangirling over Traffic Light. Memes about them and their differing personalities and presentations. A spectrum, which Shoto liked a lot. Being diverse. The girl’s group was also super popular, along with Rumi, Neito, and Nejire. The over 28s hadn't made too much of an impression, either good or bad. The worst performers were Intelli and Tsutsutaka, in Shoto’s opinion. 

Some of the contestants were filmed within the house, and there was a whole lunch segment of Katsuki cooking for the people he liked. He was irritated with being filmed, but didn't protest too much. 

Being on camera in the house felt a lot more like reality TV. After the cooking, some of them gathered around the couch to play cards, and Shoto kept winning with his blank face while Izuku lost continuously because he wore his heart on his shoulder. Plus, the muttering to himself didn't help. It was really cute. 

Every day was filled with practice and training, with their next theme being basically “sing a sad song” week. Shoto knew his fair share of depressing music, and with the new discovery of Katsuki being actually pretty good at rapping (which wasn't all too surprising), Shoto had a good idea of what song he thought they should pick. 

“I have an idea for a song.” His bandmates looked surprised, but nodded to listen, and Shoto pulled up a song he’d cried to in private multiple times. “It’s called Paralyzed, by NF. Has a sort of rap segment Katsuki could do.” 

Shoto no longer cried when listening to it, so he didn't embarrass himself. “That’s perfect,” Izuku said. “Super depressing but also with good range, and Katsuki can show off his rapping!” 

“Agreed. That’s our song,” Katsuki said with a grin. So, they practiced that, and Shoto was looking forward to performing again. It was far more enjoyable than he anticipated, and really, he could get used to it. 

-x-

Time seemed to move faster the rest of the week, and soon they were dressed and ready to perform.

Some of the songs performed didn't actually feel too sad, some were even upbeat. The only really depressing one was As The World Caves In, performed by Mirio, which was very, very well done. 

Then, Traffic Light’s turn came up, and there was much less energy from them in this one, planned to just walk around slowly. It felt so strange, singing this song in front of thousands of people, and millions on TV, when it had been something he resonated with so much growing up. He channeled the sadness into his part, and moved aside when the rap portion came in so Katsuki could take over, before Izuku and Shoto joined back in with him at the end. 

For the first time with this song, Shoto felt like crying out of happiness instead of sadness. 

The judges were again happy, and Nemuri even wiped a tear from her eyes, but she’d teared up with Mirio’s performance too, so they weren't special. 

“That was a very versatile performance,” Shouta said after some general “good works”s from the rest. “Showing off the fact you have a possible rapper in your group. I really felt the emotion in that song, especially from Shoto.” He flushed a bit, and scratched his cheek shyly. “I hope you stay deep into the competition, because I want to see just how many styles you can do.” 

They thanked him, and headed off the stage. Izuku hugged Shoto once they were out of view of cameras immediately. “It was a good pick,” he said quietly. 

“Thanks. I’m glad we went with it.” 

Another performance solidified that this was what Shoto wanted to do in life. It had nothing to do with what his father wanted. A small blessing that he’d never fool himself into thinking he was pressured or coerced into it. And it was all thanks to Izuku and Katsuki. And he was already excited for the next song they’d sing, whatever it was. The theme was the 80s. 

Shoto never really listened to 80s music so he wasn't going to be picking this one.

-x-

Shoto woke up with a gasp, jerking upright in bed, holding his hands over his left eye. A nightmare memory, his mother pouring boiling water over his eye. The pain had been unbearable, and it was the last memory of his mother he had, of the crazed look of hate and fear on her face as she permanently scarred Shoto. 

If she hadn't disappeared, Shoto could have forgiven her. But he never got the chance before she was gone for good.

“Sho?” Izuku asked sleepily from his bed across the room. “Are you okay?” 

"I'm fine… bad dream,” Shoto muttered back. 

“Wanna talk about it?” Izuku offered. 

“Just a memory dream. About - about how I got my scar,” Shoto replied, and laid back down. He heard the creak of a bed, Katsuki snoring away, while Izuku walked over to Shoto’s bed. He made a “move it” motion, and Shoto scooched back, confused, until Izuku pulled up the blanket, and crawled under next to him, making Shoto freeze in shock. 

“This okay?” Izuku asked softly. Shoto nodded, sharing the pillow and bed with one of his best friends. In the most platonic way. At least, that's what he tried to convince himself as he watched Izuku quickly fall asleep, perfectly comfortable. 

Friends, friends, platonic care. 

Friends. FRIENDS. 

He was so warm. He smelled good, too. Well, it was just once. It would be fine. Shoto allowed his body to relax slowly, closing his eyes. It was nice, sleeping next to someone. He’d never done it before, at least, not that he could remember. His siblings never stayed with him, and he’d never had a friend before. 

Shoto drifted into a dreamless sleep. 

When he woke up, it was to Katsuki shoving at Izuku. “Oi, there’s cameras, get out of his bed before they turn on,” he insisted. Izuku jumped out of bed, but the red light on the camera in the room was off. “Why were you in his bed?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow. 

“He had a nightmare. I thought it would help,” Izuku answered. 

“Well, did it?” Katsuki asked Shoto, who nodded. Katsuki shrugged it off, seeming to have no problem with it. Shoto did his very best to forget about Izuku sleeping in his twin bed with him. They didn't cuddle, but had been very close. Shoto’s face heated at the memory, but they didn't notice as they all dressed for the day. Shoto grabbed a towel from the cupboard in the corner to go take a quick shower. 

Once he came back out, he picked apart his dufflebag for a brush, and ripped it through his hair. “Oi! Use a fucking comb when it’s wet!” Katsuki said, yanking the brush out of Shoto’s hands. 

“I don't have a comb,” Shoto said, not seeing the problem. Katsuki huffed, and glanced at the brush, before he snorted. 

“I guess mixing red and white makes pink, huh? Your hair looks like cotton candy,” he teased. Shoto rolled his eyes. “Don't give me attitude as you rip your hair out. Hang on.” He grabbed a comb from his own backpack, and started to comb out Shoto’s hair gently. 

This wasn't fair. Why were they both being all gentle and caring? Was that truly a friend thing guys did? When he googled affection between men, it had just been those clap hugs and hand shakes. Which didn't feel so personal. He needed to ask, because he was unsure. So, when Katsuki was done with his hair, making sure his part was perfectly, neatly split, he asked. 

“Is sharing a bed and brushing hair a thing guy friends do?” he asked, sounding so innocent. Katsuki took a small step back, and swore. 

“Fuck. Not really.”

“You didn't think it was weird when you woke up and saw us. Would other people?” 

“Yeah. Probably,” Katsuki sighed, running a hand through his hair. It made an uncomfortable flutter in Shoto’s chest. “Probably should work on that, especially if we’re being filmed.” He sent a glare at the corner of the room.

“Sometimes, when we go out on stage and I’m nervous, I’m jealous that the girls get to hold hands in comfort and we can't. It’s dumb,” Shoto said, looking at his hands in his lap. 

“You're so fucking sweet,” Katsuki huffed. “In complete privacy… we can hold hands.” 

“As friends?” 

“Yes. Who the fuck cares what people who don't know will think? It’ll just be us.” Shoto smiled at him, and nodded. Katsuki huffed, but smiled back. Then Izuku walked in, ripping a brush through his own curly wet hair. “Oh, for fuck’s sake! You, too?!” 

-x-

They picked Anyway You Want It for the theme, but Shoto was distracted all week. It didn't impact his work ethic, or voice, but he kept finding himself watching his best friends. And his heart was a little erratic all week. It was getting annoying, and he worried he was ill. Being ill wasn't going to be great for a singing competition. 

He was frustrated with it, and when he scowled at the floor when seeing Izuku change into pajamas the night before their next performance made his heart skip a beat again, they both noticed his expression, which was one he very rarely wore. “What’s with the sour look?” Katsuki asked.

"I'm having heart palpitations.” 

“What?! When did that start? Do you have health problems?” 

“No. I don't know what’s wrong. It started on Tuesday.” 

“What triggers it?” 

“I don't know! But it's really annoying. It’s like my heart skips and my face gets all hot.” 

“Oh. Does it happen when you look at someone else?” Izuku asked, sounding upset, and looking upset.

“You guys. Which means it's happening all the time and it's pissing me off.” 

“Oh… oh,” Izuku said, putting his hands over his mouth. Katsuki ran his hands down his face, cheeks red up to his ears. “Uh oh.” 

Shoto frowned deeper. “Do you think I’m sick?” he asked in fear. 

“No. Uh, no, it’s not a sickness. Oh gosh.” Izuku just stared at Shoto for a long moment, before his face turned beet red, and he slapped his hands over his face, face planting in his bed, kicking his feet into the mattress. Katsuki eyed the camera in the corner, but it was off right now. 

He took a deep breath and sat down on Izuku’s bed, who was muttering into his pillow at rapid speed. Katsuki looked at him with a huff, and then walked to sit next to Shoto, and took his hand, alarming Shoto. Was it some awful sickness, and he was going to die? “Am I gonna die?” 

“Shit, no. You're not sick.” 

“Then why are you guys acting like I’m terminally ill.” 

“You… have a crush on us.” 

“No I don't,” Shoto said instantly. 

“It’s fine. It’s fine if you do,” Katsuki said, looking awkward. He threaded his fingers through his, squeezing, his palm sweaty and warm. “I do, too,” he whispered, looking ashamed. 

“You both, too?” Izuku asked from his bed, eyes bright, wide and watery. Katsuki gave a tiny smile, and a nod. “I… I do, too.” 

“Really? We all… romantically like each other?” Shoto asked softly, shocked. 

“Looks like it. But it’ll ruin our fucking career before it even starts. Even… if it was just two of us. And there was a third wheeler. We cannot act on it,” Katsuki said firmly, sounding genuinely upset. “Nemuri was right. It would ruin us. It sucks. I mean, maybe if we rent a place together, keep the windows closed and shit, maybe someday. But it’ll always be a secret.” 

Shoto was very sad, but understood why. Katsuki kissed the back of his hand. “You gotta learn how to ignore it, or hide it. We all have to. We can't let anyone figure it out. We’re best friends only. Even if… even if it feels like we’re more. Like we’re supposed to be more.” 

“Agreed,” Izuku said, pain in his voice. “As long as we’re in this house, we can't do anything romantic like. Shoto, that means… means no longing glances, holding hands, kissing, or embracing. Okay?” 

Shoto nodded, eyes a little teary. In relief, and sadness. Relief they didn't hate him, weren't uncomfortable by his feelings. Sadness that they all liked each other like that and could never, ever show it. 

And Shoto was not about to ruin three futures because he finally developed the ability to truly feel. Requited but rejected love was painful. 

-x-

It was a good sign that nobody caught onto their melancholy the rest of the week. They didn't let their feelings impact their practice, behavior or expressions. Nobody had any idea they’d had a confession and mutual agreement to bury their feelings, at least for now, and forever in public. Shoto’s heart didn't stutter as much, and now that he knew what it was, he wasn't scared and too stressed. 

Nobody caught on. They were okay. They would be okay. Shoto wished they didn't feel these things for each other, because it would be a lot easier and less bittersweet that they were putting their career before their feelings. But they wanted this too much to derail things for a relationship. Friendship was wonderful. They didn't need romance, too. 

But Shoto was apparently wrong in his assumption that nobody would notice and it wouldn't affect their performance, because after they did their song for the next live show, all four judges commented that they seemed more down, and less energetic. Their performance wasn't as alive, excited and genuine. 

“Whatever’s got you down, fix it and come back stronger next week.” The judges all got boos for their criticisms, but they were rooted in reality. The three of them were down. They had to fix it. 

But how the hell do they “fix” it? What the hell were they supposed to do? And it didn't help that the next song they would be doing was a love song sung by a female artist. But before they picked a song, they needed to fix this before they were voted off for repressed feelings. 

“What do we do?” Izuku asked quietly. 

Katsuki was gritting his teeth, glared at the camera, which was not on, and walked over to it, shoving a sock over it, and stormed up to Shoto, fisting his hand in his hair and attacking his mouth. Shoto gasped in the kiss as he was pushed down on his back. Katsuki pulled away, and barked at Izuku to get over there. Izuku got up instantly and hurried over. 

It was awkward, messy, but not uncomfortable as they took turns kissing each other, very careful to leave no marks, nothing to show evidence. They slept piled in the same bed, Shoto squished against one wall, with Izuku basically lying on top of both him and Katsuki. They set their alarms early to remove the sock from the camera, and check themselves over for marks. 

Clean. Safe. 

And it worked, because they were back in the game, and their slip up was not the end. They weren't voted off. Safe for now. 

They chose a song that didn't really have anything to do with Them with a capital T. So they didn't somehow perform so good people got suspicious that they were in a relationship, any of them, with anyone. Not just each other. It was a bit of a thrill. 

They picked Young and Beautiful, because it had a unique sound they wanted to attempt. There were no solos in this one, as all three of them at once the entire time. It matched the original vibe of the song. They were feeling much more confident, now. There were no cravings to kiss them or even send a loving look. They would be safe, no slip ups. 

-x-

Out of the performers left, Shoto had an idea of who would end up in the finals. He was pretty sure, if the three of them got their mojo back this time, they, Rainy Season, Rumi, Mirio, and Nejire would be in the finals. Then, it was a toss up between them and Shoto had no idea who of those would get booted first and who’d stay last. 

When the three walked out on stage, they had dark suits on, completely black with black shoes. They stayed in the same spots during the song, but weren't completely motionless given their hands were free. They were still using the ear pieces, after all. 

By the expressions of the judges, they had gotten their mojo back. But Shouta had a comment that irked Shoto a bit based on his past comments. “Every week you come out sounding different. Is there a goal to this? I'm not getting a real sound of you.” 

“We’re trying multiple sounds out. We haven't decided what we want.” 

“Or if we’ll stick to one thing,” Katsuki added. 

“It’s fun doing different things!” Izuku said. 

“I see. Well, you got your mojo back. Glad to see it’s returned, and I hope it stays.” 

Shoto wanted to kiss them both so bad, but nobody was the wiser.