Chapter Text
There was nothing stranger than the presence of another living being in his space, to Xiao. Especially one that was becoming increasingly common in his life— their constant calling of his name for trivial matters, such as trying a new recipe of almond tofu and helping to grab a cat from a tree as a commission. Pitiful, he had originally thought to himself, for someone to be lonely enough to call a demon for conversation and comfort. But Xiao had found a weird sentiment deep in the crevices of his heart, one he hadn’t felt since the days of the other Yakshas. He had found himself enjoying— no, not that far— standing this ‘traveler’s company.
“Call out my name, Adeptus Xiao. I’ll be there when you call,” had been a promise he had given to many of Morax’s friends in the past. Anything to help out his newer master’s needs, for he found his hands itching to assist when the old god said, ‘That’s all.’ He was annoyed at first when the traveler and his fairy pet had started to call him for things other than battle— what the original promise was for— but Xiao had gotten used to it. Solitude was his preference, but the feeling of being helpful was almost a little greater.
Up on the balcony of Whangshu Inn, the old spirit stood, his eyes fixated and sharpened on the blade of sun that was just peaking through the clouded mountains west of the building. The traveler would be here soon, if Xiao could guess; every morning for the last month, the mortal would climb up to the inn and call out his name expectantly, either with a gift of some sort or a mindless task for him to help on. Perhaps he is weak, Xiao considered; the commissions may be too much for him to stand. He might need my help just to get through them. He bowed his head and shook it. No, that wasn’t it. Xiao had seen the traveler pounce into battle without any hesitation before, like a mother bear to her cub, especially if a fellow mortal was in danger. He could hold himself in a fight just fine… so why did the young man attach so heavily to Xiao’s side for assistance? Maybe it was a human practice the adeptus wasn’t too aware of; from the chuckles of Morax, it seemed to Xiao that his knowledge and understanding were limited even in the eyes of fellow immortals.
“Oh,” a soft voice behind him spoke; Xiao turned knowingly. There was the traveler, bright-eyed and mildly surprised, like a child caught with his hand in a cookie jar. “Hi, Xiao!” The sort of… fairy thing behind him chirped gleefully, her floating form just above enough to not bump into the man’s head. Nothing was different from the countless times the traveler had come to bother him— besides, well, the man’s hair. Usually wrapped in a deceptively tidy braid, it wasn’t today. “I was going to call you… But it seems you already expected us.”
“What do you need now, traveler?” Xiao responded bluntly, but not harshly. Suspicious, with the way the traveler was shifting nervously on his heels.
“Dumb question,” the traveler started, as Xiao took a breath of air to stay patient with the mortal, “could you help braid my hair today?”
The adeptus couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow, his golden eyes flickering in mild confusion and maybe with a little irritation. Another trivial task. “I’ve seen you braid your hair every other day I’ve seen you. Why must you ask for help just now?”
“Well… I want a certain braid. There's a small festival going on today, and my friend, Xinyan, told me to wear ribbons in my hair, but I can’t get it right. I thought because you are from here and all, and have watched many celebrations from afar, maybe you’d know. You’ve seen how they’ve done them, right?”
Xiao sighed before he turned to pull out a chair, waiting patiently for the traveler to bend down, his hands itching slightly to do something other than just the childish act of braiding another’s hair. But the traveler smiled gratefully, albeit a little guiltily, as he pulled from his bag a bundle of red ribbon. Then a hairbrush. Then an assortment of wooden braiding tools.
Useless. Xiao couldn’t help but glare lightly at the supplies; there was no way that the traveler couldn’t do this himself, but Xiao couldn’t help but relent. The man’s hair was beautiful, Xiao couldn’t lie. Silky soft and healthy in a way that didn’t require the traveler to care for it barely at all. It reminded Xiao of the curls of a particularly soft fleece, primed into perfect blond strands. “Thank you,” the traveler gently whispered under his breath as Xiao grunted wordlessly in response. There’s no reason to this, Xiao wanted to say, as he gathered his untrained fingers through the blond’s hair to make three strands. He often paused, contemplating where he should turn and twist, and even if he was doing it right. Traveler’s companion, Paimon, rattled on about something about festival food, Xiao’s pointed ears twitching in mild annoyance at the shrill voice; it thankfully soon haltered, as the little spirit drifted off, held tenderly in the traveler’s arms. A long few minutes turned into silence, the only sound being Xiao’s fingers on ribbon and hair. Xiao coughed awkwardly a few times, a little uncomfortable with the silence; quiet while alone was one thing, but he never knew the traveler to be anything but a quiet presence. Without the chatter of Paimon or others though, there was nothing. Just the sound of another breathing. He opened his mouth to speak a few times, but found little things to say to the man as anxiety crept on the nape of his neck.
It was much too intimate for him.
“I’m being to quiet, aren’t I?” Xiao jumped slightly at the sudden voice, clearing his throat again as he nodded. The traveler looked up carefully, giving a soft, more genuine smile to him. “I have to admit. I didn’t really need your help doing this.”
Xiao nodded again, more sure. “I know.” He mumbled, before another silence took the two. The traveler chuckled softly, his eyes avoiding Xiao’s in a way that he didn’t understand. “I… I’m sorry. It was a bit of Paimon’s idea. You see… I haven’t had anyone else braid my hair in a while. My sister used to braid my hair with a ribbon.”
Xiao’s mouth opened once more, his words failing him once more as he nodded dully… three times must make him look like some type of wordless idiot. “Oh,” was the only thing that came out, as his hands faltered. He took a breath, a discomfort curling in his stomach, but he couldn’t help the curiosity in his expression. Comfort was what he needed, yet the adeptus had never known how, or even the feeling, of comfort. The traveler sighed, looking down and obscuring his face from Xiao, a frustrating move.
“I kind of missed someone doing my hair. I must be bringing you away from your duties for such a dumb ask, but… you’re the only one not to ask questions about it. I can braid my hair just fine with a ribbon.”
“I know,” Xiao repeated, the only words that would come out.
“I mainly just come here because… You seem lonely. You remind me of… I mean, I think its nice to just…”
“I know.”
Both went silent again, and Xiao wondered if he had said the wrong thing. “Thank you.” The traveler spoke, before reaching over his shoulder and squeezing the adeptus’s hand. He blinked— the weight, even through Xiao’s gloves, was apparent. The feeling of another, the… scent of another. Suddenly, Xiao felt something heavy be lifted off his heart— his discomfort gone in an instant. A sudden… It's okay . Yet it was no flute sung at the end of the battle, nor the freeing touch of his master, Morax. It was simply just a touch from a mere stranger. A no one in the big scheme of his life. Yet, Xiao couldn’t let go.
“Thank you.” The traveler repeated. “You’re a good person, Xiao.”
Xiao gulped as he let go, his hand immediately itching for more of that fleeting touch. If Xiao wasn’t so trained with hiding his words, his emotions— Xiao could almost cry at the lack of it. Instead, Xiao only coughed, as if it was nothing, and the heavy weight sat back on his shoulders as if that moment had never happened. My karmic debt… Xiao almost mentioned, as he looked up to the morning sky as if to hide the pained expression. It was a fluke, of course. In some moments where Xiao found himself distracted, he could close to ignore it, but it never faded completely. But there… it felt weaker, and all Xiao wanted in a pathetic moment of fragility was to grasp back at that hand and hold his arm close like a scared child.
The traveler, as embarrassing as it was, seemed to notice the change in tone, as he tried to get up. “Xiao?”
Xiao only stammered, an agonized grunt escaping him without it meaning to, before a convenient interruption— Paimon. “Huh? Are you guys done braiding yet?” She mumbled, wiping her eyes and looking curiously at the two. “Xiao?” She spoke, gliding over to see the tenseness of Xiao’s face. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine… your hair is done, traveler.” He muttered, trying to gather himself once more. Halfheartedly, he tied the end of the traveler’s braid, gripping at his temple for a moment. In the side of his blurring gaze, he saw the worried expression of the other man, a heartless thing to do to Xiao, as the face only made him grip his head harder. “My karmic debt is just acting up… I can deal with it myself. Go.”
Stay, a sudden voice yelled in his mind, frightening him for a moment before he realized it wasn’t a verbal one. “Xiao…” The traveler’s voice mumbled fretfully, painfully fretfully, as if Xiao was weak. He stiffened his jaw, his eyes hardening their gaze in insistence. “Leave me. I will be fine.”
The blond, obviously in protest, opened his mouth before Paimon pulled on his messy braid. “C'mon,” she muttered softly, the two giving a knowing look at the adeptus. “ Leave me,” Xiao strained out once more, as finally, the two hesitantly started to leave. Tears of agony threatened to spill, as the voices only got louder, the pain on his heart and wrists squeezing with its unnatural grip. Between the blurring lines of his vision, he could see the shotty work of traveler’s hair, braided into a tangle of lack of practice and shaky hands— but there was a light there. Something in his eyes, something there that Xiao couldn’t explain.
Xiao sighed in pain, forcing his hand to the ground, darkened swirls of anemo magic coming from his palm to hide himself away in needed solitude.
That touch, the last of his sane mind called, and soon, Xiao’s presence on the inn’s balcony was gone in an instant, only a cool breeze left in his memory.