Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Flames crackled as sparks flew all around the air, debris from destroyed structures fell, constant explosions boomed in the distance.

Countless clanging of steel hitting each other rang, people screaming as their bodies were pierced.

Smoke covered the entire Capital City of Lugunica, bodies adorned with cultist robes, knight uniforms and even civilians alike laid limp on the ground.

- Betty, take care of those cultists there, please!

- Betty's on it, I suppose!

A girl with silver hair ordered, her hands holding a blade of ice. Then, the air around her went cold.

Many icicles formed out of thin air, then sent flying to a group of cultists in front of a civilian.

Two were hit, while the other three dodged or blocked. But without a moments notice, Emilia had already dashed over to them, slashing one in their torso.

Seeing their chance, the remaining two quickly attempted to counterattack.

Yet, as their blades started to reach her, air in front of her started to freeze.

An ice barrier formed, blocking their lunges. The blades clanged as they were slightly pushed back from being deflected.

- Don't think Betty will let anything happen to her contractor, I suppose!

Two purple crystals lodged in their hearts, their bodies falling unto the ground alongside their companions.

Their chest crystallized as the crystals dissipated.

- How is your side? Did you take care of them, Betty?

The girl with elven ears questioned, her voice slightly weak and tired.

- It's fine, I suppose...you must rest before we continue.

- No, no, I'm fine. We still have many more people needing help.

Beatrice sighed at her hard-headed contractor, rubbing her temples. She did not want Emilia to strain herself, she's been fighting for almost two days now.

Then, she smiled. That just meant that the girl had a kind heart, helping people even if it harmed herself.

That did not feel right. Like something was missing, a piece...

She shook her head, waving the thoughts away.

- Betty, are you alright?

- ...Betty is fine, I suppose. Now, shall we go?

- Okay!

Again...something in the drill-haired blonde didn't feel quite right. That unfamiliar word...

- What does that even mean...?

- Ahh...eh? I must've gotten it from Garfiel. Doesn't he like saying those idioms?

It's been like this for a few months, now. That feeling of loss, a piece missing.

- Oh well, shall we go now?

Emilia nodded her head, now sounding more energetic. The duo then continued their mission, finding and saving any survivor while fighting off Witch Cultists.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ever since the death of the Sin Archbishop of Pride and Greed a few months prior, the people of Lugunica had been living in a short period of peace.

Greed was slain, Wrath captured, but Gluttony and Lust escaped their grasp. The latter two mostly responsible for their current headaches.

The people with devoured name were due to the Gluttonies, and the poor souls who were unfortunate enough to meet with the Sin Archbishop of Lust, Capella.

Wrath couldn't be interrogated, she never answers. Yet, if she was ever harmed, they risked being caught in her authority.

She just monologues on, and on, and on, and on about love. About the boy who reeked with more miasma than them, the one most beloved by all.

The Sin Archbishop of Pride, the Great Spirit of Yin subdued the cultist who, according to her, lied that he was her real contractor.

He asked if they had a contract, her face burning with anger after confirming.

She had concluded that he used his power to temper with the contract she had with Emilia.

Enraged, the spirit casted multiple Minyas and he easily went down.

He was already in a very injured state, desperate and manic. Luckily, Emilia had managed to stop her from causing any more damage and allowed for the cultist to be imprisoned.

There, he was placed in an interrogation room, so he may have a chance to prove his innocence. A chance the half-elf gave her through the spirit's reluctance.

First, they were simply questions. He said he didn't know anything, he said his name was eaten.

But then Beatrice pointed out his miasma, completely screwing him over...and then as they searched him, a gospel was found in his pockets.

He tried to lie to them, saying it was to figure out anything about the Witch Cult.

That was clearly concrete proof that he was indeed a cultist.

After that, he was ordered to be vacated from the room and given a cell. Filthy, dark, cold. All forms of uncomfortable you could think.

Several people came to ask him questions, all of them from the Dragon Priestess' camps.

Ram asked him, expression showing scorn. She wanted to know how to turn her sister back to normal. He didn't know.

Garfiel questioned him, eyes glaring with anger. He wanted to heal his family, inflicted with Capella's authority.

Emilia. She was as she always was. Kind and considerate, but that didn't mean she was wary. She seemed always guarded near him.

She wanted to believe. That he was a kind person, not an evil cultist. She asked for a possible solution, yet he did not know.

Beatrice looked ready to kill him if he made any suspicious movement.

Julius wanted his name returned, the boy did not know how. He hoped that the knight would be able to see through him, to no avail.

Felix demanded a cure for his lady's curse. After suggesting he go to Crusch and try to solve it, the feline slapped him and stormed out, muttering something about a manipulator.

Of course, what knight would allow an archbishop near his sick lady?

This went on for another day, then another, and then another. Their frustration was getting clear to him.

Each day, he felt anxious. That they would finally snap. That their calm would finally break.

Each day, he sensed their rising malice. He slightly trembled when one of them attempted to question him.

What else could he do? He really knew nothing.

If only Reinhard was here...he could confirm that he was innocent. Yet, it was said that the Sword Saint was away on a mission.

Then, a week passed.

It was Felix's turn to interrogate him. Everytime they did, they made him go to a room with a table, cuffing his hands that seemed to nullify magic and strapped him to a chair.

This time he looked more desperate, trembling. He seemed afraid of something, maybe for his lady's health...or his failure as a knight.

He seemed unstable, mind too troubled to properly think.

- T-the cure...TELL ME! I NEED TO HEAL CRUSCH-SAMA, or I'll...

He yelled with boiling frustration, choking out his last words.

- I keep telling you! I'm not! I'm not a cultist! I'M NOT ONE OF THEM!

Subaru snapped back, his emotions finally spilling. He was frustrated, he was angry. Why must he go through this?

Why must he endure the cold, piercing gazes of his friends?

Why must he try to swat away that feeling of abandonment? Of loneliness?

Why? Why? Why?

- SHUT UP, YOU CULTIST! YOU DON'T KNOW! SHE'S...she's...

- THEN LET ME GO TO HER! I'LL HEAL HER, I'LL SAVE HER!

The healer's eyes widened, pupils dilated. His brows furrowed, baring his fangs as he gritted.

- You...WHAT KIND OF A JOKE ARE YOU MAKING?! DO YOU THINK I'M STUPID?!

Felix screamed, grabbing Subaru's collar tightly.

- I...If I was an archbishop, would I really be letting this situation happen?!

The raven-haired boy tried to argue, eyes glaring.

- HAH?! BEATRICE-SAMA CONFIRMED HERSELF!

The feline argued back, voice filled with certainty.

- YOU THINK YOU CAN FOOL ME?!

He formed a fist, aiming it to Subaru. The boy tried to face away from it, his body restrained in the chair.

- ...enough. Starting tommorow, i'll be in charge of you. Until you spit out the truth.

A shadow on his face formed, his fist dropping. He forced the boy away as he let go of his collar.

Subaru's heart beated rapidly, sweat dropping from his forehead.

He did not know. Truly, did he not. Yet, he still pays for the cult's sins. Him. Him. HIM. Of all people.

The days that followed were harsh, knights came to interrogate him. If he did not answer, he was beaten. If he said he didn't know, he was still beaten.

His friends from Emilia's camps were no different, they were more aggresive now. Garfiel resisted punching him full force, Ram almost casting her wind magic and ending him.

The few people he hoped would come didn't, Emilia was busy helping with the damages caused during Priestella's siege. Reinhard was away and probably won't come back for a while.

He was alone in the world, right now. Probably the most, out of all who existed. He was forgotten, no one remembered him.

His body hurts, being punched hurts, being kicked hurts, being beaten hurts. His bones hurt, his bruises hurt. It hurt. It hurt. It hurt.

Being forgotten hurt.

He laid on the floor, eyes showing clear signs of exhaustion ans fatigue.

He did not want to accept it, that he was abandoned.

They chained his arms, legs, and neck. All of which nullified any use of magic.

His face felt swollen, an arm broken, ribs shattered. A warm feeling enveloped him, a hand healing his injuries.

- This'll be all, archbishop. You need to stay alive, so we may continue to question you.

Felix muttered, soon leaving the room. Blood dried his tracksuit, now torned and riddled with small holes.

Another day passed, more pain for him to endure. More times for him to say he did not know.

Then another. And another. And another. And another.

Each passing day, the knights methods intensified. The feline just watching them, waiting for him to spill out anything.

They tried pulling out his nails, cutting off a finger, a hand, an arm, a foot, anything they could to inflict as much pain as they could.

They stabbed his eyes, riddled his body with needles, pour lava on him.

He screamed, and screamed, and screamed. Echoing into the dark, dirty corridors of the prison.

He can't break. Not now, not yet. It hurt. Everything hurt. He musn't give up. Endure. Endure.

Everytime he almost died, Felix healed him. Only to do it all over again.

And again. And again. And again. And again.

His vision seemed blurry, dark. He swore he saw a graying strand of hair fall atop him.

Garfield and Ram had finally stopped coming, even Emilia and Beatrice. He was alone, so alone.

He wanted to talk. He wanted a nice conversation. He felt cold. He wanted warmth.

The days ticked away, hours slipping his mind, minutes going unnoticed, seconds unexisting. It was only pain, merely pain.

Why? Why? Why? It hurts. It hurts.

Before he knew it, Felix had already joined in with the knights. His methods even more painful, more horrifying, more traumatizing.

It was as if fate was playing a cruel joke on him, or maybe this was what he deserved.

He tried killing himself, he tried biting his tongue, they managed to heal him and gagged his mouth.

He stopped himself from breathing, yet the knight that guarded him was quick to alert his allies. They healed him, and his attempt was in vain.

Ever since, one had always watched him, taking turns. They never took their eyes off of him. They never allowed him to die.

A cruel joke, indeed.

Because he was slothful, for he did not want to know that he had been forsakened.

Because he was greedy, for trying to save everyone, not wanting for it to turn out like Rem.

Because he was prideful, for thinking he could ever stand next to them.

Because he was wrathful, for letting his emotions take over him.

Because he was envious, for longing to be happy.

His blood was boiled, his nerves fried, cuts littered his skin, bruises around his body.

He didn't want to give up, he didn't want to believe, he didn't want to think.

That he was alone. He hoped they would come back and save him. Then, they would smile at him and tell him everything was okay.

Yet, they never did.

Atleast three months had passed, and all of them finally had enough. They looked at him like he was useless.

He knew what would happen. What they would do.

They had brought him out of the cell, finally giving him a bath. But, you wouldn't really call it that. They just poured cold water on him, then changed his clothes into one, huge cloth.

They covered his face with a mask, cuffing his hands.

He wished he could escape, yet they were stronger. His chains rattled as a knight pulled them, forcing him to somewhere.

A wooden door creaked open. In the distance, he heard chanting. Shouting. Screaming.

- DEATH TO THE ARCHBISHOP!

- DIE, YOU MURDERER!

The crowd yelled, throwing stones at him. He flinched back in pain, no one even trying to block for him.

He was Pride, so what else did he expect? But...

If only Garfield was here, to protect and shield him.

- DEATH TO PRIDE!

They continued, their voices echoing in unison.

If only Emilia was here, to comfort him and the pain.

- MANIAC! MURDERER!

If only Ram was here, to tease him and make him smile.

If only Rem was here, If only Beatrice was here. If only. If only. If only.

He stumbled, his eyes unseeing of the wooden stairs. The knight pulled him up on a wooden platform as he struggled, clutching the collar around his neck in pain.

They continued to stone him, hitting even the scars the cloth he wore hid.

- SILENCE, PEOPLE!

A familiar voice from a certain purple-haired knight rang.

Then, everything went quiet. The chanting stopped, the stoning seized, the insults paused.

- FOR CENTURIES, THE WITCH CULT HAS WON VICTORY AFTER VICTORY AGAINST US! Well...TODAY! MARKS NOT THE FIRST, BUT OUR SECOND VICTORY AFTER THE EMILIA CAMP SLAYED SLOTH!

It was eerily quiet, as if they had been waiting for this moment their whole lives. Their attention completely taken.

- TO THE DRAGON!

- TO THE DRAGON!

The whole crowd chanted, shouting in unison. They cheered as the boy felt something being tied around his neck.

...why...me...?

He only wanted the best for everyone, so he worked hard, so hard...

Why must he go through this? He has done his very best and gave it his all.

Maybe he was being too greedy, to ask for the perfect, happy ending.

Maybe he was too prideful, too stubborn to give up on everyone...everything he held dear.

Was he...ever enough? Was everything he did not enough? All that suffering...the pain...

In this moment, he could only feel the regret piling up in his chest.

Then, the footing under him broke. Everything going quiet instantly.

His neck snapped, his body hanging limp.

And then, light.

His eyes snapped open, the cold stone underneath him seeping into his skin. His eyes locked on the ceiling, completely exhausted.

A lone tear fell from his cheek, a lump forming in his throat.

And then another, and another. They flowed endlessly, his sobs echoing in the stone corridors of the prison.

Another three months had passed, not once during it did he die, only endure. And endure. And endure.

He died.

He woke up in the same cell, same floor, same ceiling, same walls, same bars.

Three months pass, not a single thing changing. Just endure, and endure even more pain. He hoped that they would come save him.

He died again. Faint hesitation in his belief.

He died again. Doubt starting to infect him.

He died again. Anger, he felt towards them.

He died again. Sadness, he felt for himself and his situation.

He died again. He had accepted silently, that no one would come for him.

And then, he died...once again. He just...felt hollow. Everything felt numb to him, whether it be mind or body.

Sometimes he just stared, doing nothing, thinking nothing. He only screamed when they began to torture him all over again. He just didn't want to do anything.

He had given up, he could feel nothing. His eyes were hollow, his breathing weak and slow.

They deemed him as useless and ordered for his execution. Once again. He just wished, that everything would stop.

He just simply existed, then they would hurt him again...rinse and repeat. Over and over again.

They starved him, dehydrated him. Nothing made sense to him anymore.

So when the day he would be executed publicly came, he didn't react. His body just moving on auto-pilot, the same knight dragging him by the chains.

The stones that landed on him didn't hurt as much as they used to. He barely noticed. Getting his blood boiled, nerves fried, limbs cut hurt more.

Then, they would heal him again. Over and over. Again and again. Forever.

Next time, he had to avoid this situation at ANY cost.

And so, when his body hanged in the air, he only remembered his parents.

- ...so...r...y...mom...da...

They were probably worried about their son, so caring and considerate of him. They deserved a better son for sure, one that wouldn't ever dissapoint them.

Someone more fitting than him, who had done nothing but leech off and off.

He wished...that he had done better for them.

And so, he took his last breath.

A month had passed since the death of the Sin Archbishop of Pride, Natsuki Subaru. Four months since their victory in the siege of Priestella.

Once again, the cult attacked the Capital City Lugunica. The battle was harsh, unforgiving. Civilians died, families were seperated, friends murdered, innocents lost their lives.

Lust and Gluttony attacked, leading countless members of the cult. Monsters wrecked havoc as the murderers killed everyone in sight.

Buildings were blown up, structures destroyed. It looked hopeless, yet they managed to win.

It was all thanks to the half-elf, Emilia, and her contracted spirit, Beatrice the Great Spirit of Yin. They slayed 2 of the Gluttony Archbishops, with Lust fleeing along with the rest of the cult.

They had no choice but to kill them, before more innocents died. The two took hostages, so it had to be done.

They did not know if the names of those lost will ever be returned, but their lives must continue on. One of them laughed mockingly, telling them that their greatest regret would soon come.

The half-elf ended him, freezing the second Gluttony archbishop and impaling him with her ice blade.

It proved to be quite challenging, the duo had to avoid calling each other by name while forming strategy after strategy.

The people and the knights cheered as the smoke cleared, the sky finally showing light. It shedded a new dawn for the people of Lugunica.

Many lives were lost, but now, many more would be saved in the future. Only Lust remained for them to eliminate, then they were finally free of the Witch Cult.

The people sang praises of each camp, for subduing the Archbishops and eliminating them. The Emilia camp being the most popular with their feats in slaying the White Whale and reportedly, the Great Rabbit.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Now, they had returned to the Miload mansion, since the one they were previously staying at was burned down to the ground by [REDACTED] just to save Beatrice.

Ram walked along its grand hallway, a duster in hand. She has been cleaning room after room, preventing any dust from accumulating.

Her supposed twin sister still laid on her bed, eyes closed.

She turned to a familiar room, the door knob turned, the door creaking open.

A blue-haired girl laid still on a small bed, a curtain being blown by gusts of wind. The room was very clean, she always made sure to tend to it.

She always changed that flower in the vase atop the nightstand, making sure that the room was fresh when the girl woke up.

Ram still didn't remember her name, but she knew they were sisters. Their connection making it clear.

The pink-haired girl sincerely wished that her sister would wake up soon. Her dear sister...

- ...Rem.

She muttered, as if her mind was lost for a second. Her eyes looked distracted.

Then, she felt her head splitting. Her memories were coming back, filling the gaps that Gluttony created.

Then, they widened. Her hand trembled, dropping the duster she held.

Rem's finger twitched, her eyelids slowly prying open.

- R-rem...Rem!

She ran to the bed, dropping to her knees as she held her sister's hand.

- Mnhng...

She tried to stop her tears from falling, but they overflowed.

She had forgotten, her precious treasure, her beloved sibling. Rem.

Rem's eyes opened, meeting with Ram's.

- s...-sis...

She couldn't speak. Every part of her body felt weak, since she hasn't moved for a long time.

- REM! Don't worry, just rest! Your sissy will bring you something warm and nice!

Rem was confused, she didn't know what was happening. She barely remembered what happened the last time her eyes were open.

She...she was fighting. Archbishop. Gluttony. Greed. Then, she saw only darkness.

What about Subaru? Where was he? Is he alright? Is he hurt?

She did not know how much time had passed, yet she remembered. Subaru's voice, always told her stories, she heard, her mind did as it remained trapped.

At times, he whispered to her of his worries. At times, his accomplishments. All while she remained asleep.

- S-s...syy...

Ram looked back as she started to exit the room.

- Rem...?

- S-sub...a...ru...

Wh-what? Subaru...who is...

Her eyes widened in confusion, then something on the night table caught her attention. A toy plush for each of them.

Rem. Ram. Garfiel. Emilia. Otto. Petra. Frederica. And everyone else.

Then, the one with raven-hair. The one she never noticed until now. Her head once again shook, memories filling her mind.

Oh. She had forgotten, too.

Not only that, she condemned. And punished.

A breath hitched on her throat, her arms limp.

- N-no. This...it can't be...

The toy plushie of Subaru fell unto the ground, pushing the vase with the flower along with it.

It cracked, shards scattered all over the floor. The flower and plushie fell, water spilled over them.

She had forgotten, they all had. They had left him behind.

Now, he was gone.

Chapter Text

A figure shrouded in the darkest shadows was smiling, the only things you could see from it was its two protruding horns on top of its head, its eyes and mouth being completely white. Its body outlined white as a mysterious aura of crimson red emitted from it.

Two card-like shapes formed in front of him, glowing in white. Each of them had a picture of two certain people along with text and numbers.

One of them showed a picture of a blonde demi-human with text below it :

- Garfiel Tinzel

"The Indomitable Shield"

- "I'm not lettin' ya past me!"

Health : 125 / 125

Stamina : 100 / 100

Walking Speed : 12

Sprinting Speed : 27

Stamina Loss Per Second : 10

Stamina Gain Per Second : 20

Passive :

"Iron Fortress" : Garfiel takes priority hit for near teammates 1 meter away or closer. This effect is shown when his shield blinks green continously, near a teammate. If activated, the damage he will take will be reduced by 25%. This reduces by 3% per activation and caps at 10%.

Active Skills :

"Block" : Garfiel uses the shields in each of his arms, bringing them together to block any physical hit. Projectiles and Area Of Effect ignore his block and he will be damaged. He will be slowed for 2 seconds if his block is missed. If the block is successful, he will gain 1 stack of "Shield Bash".

Cooldown : 25 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : N/A
Linger : 2 seconds
Length : 1 meter

"Fired Up" : Garfiel stands still and winds up, bringing his fists together and making his shields shine green, increasing his hit priority radius by twice for 5 seconds. Upon hit, Garfiel will then shove his teammate away and take the hit himself and reduce damage taken by 25%. This will be reduced by 3% every hit and caps at 10%.

Cooldown : 20 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 1 second
Linger : 5 seconds
Length : 2 meters

"Shield Bash" : Garfiel starts out with no stack of Shield Bash (only stacks once), and will only receive a stack right upon a successful block. Once activated, he will wind up with a shielding stance for 0.5 second and instantly charge towards any direction. If enemy is hit, they are stunned for 2 seconds. If missed, Garfiel will be left defenseless and slowed for 3 seconds. This will deal 20 damage.

Cooldown : 20 seconds
Damage : 20
Windup : 0.5 second
Linger : 2/3 seconds
Length : 10 meters

Then, beside him was another one that was white in color too.

- Otto Suwen

"The Unanticipated Variable"

- "Ugh..Why'd I have to drink so much?!"

Health : 100/100

Stamina : 100/100

Walking Speed : 12

Sprinting Speed : 27

Stamina Loss Per Second : 10

Stamina Gain Per Second : 20

Passive :

"Falling Feather" : Otto makes no sounds when walking or running. His breathing will be very low and hard to hear.

Active Skills :

"Insect Swarm" : Otto is slightly slowed as he requests, after 2 seconds, flying insects will be summoned and swarm around the killer if they are within his 30 meter range. They will be slowed until the killer removes this effect by swatting them away, slowing it down for 3 seconds or waiting until the effect is undone after 10 seconds. This will also deal 2 damage per second if in effect.

Damage : 2/1 second
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 10 seconds
Length : 30 meters

Cooldown : 25 seconds

"Frufroo, Protect Them!" : Otto yells, pointing towards any direction. After 2 seconds, The Ground Dragon Frufroo is summoned and instantly charges towards the pointed direction. If the killer is hit, they will be pushed back and slowed for 3 seconds. This will deal 20 damage. The charge will last 4 seconds if missed, or there are no obstacles in the way.

Cooldown : 25 seconds
Damage: 20
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger :4 seconds
Length : 20 meters

"Unforeseeable" : Otto silently calls out to flying insects for 2 seconds, swarming himself with them and going "Undetectable" for 10 seconds.

Cooldown : 40 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 10 seconds
Length : N/A

This was merely two of the many other that will come soon. Then, another card formed which glowed a crimson red.

In it, pictured a girl with flaming red hair, styled in a ponytail. Her eyes were a pearl blue. Half of her body was in complete shadow, a strange energy coming off of her.

- Theresia van Astrea

"Shadow of the Sword Saintess"

- "I swear I'll find you...Reinhard van Astrea..."

Health : 2000 / 2000

Stamina : 120/120

Walking Speed : 9

Sprinting Speed : 28

Stamina Loss Per Second : 10

Stamina Gain Per Second : 20

Terror Radius : 30 meters

Terror Theme : In Hell We Live, Lament (Instrumental)

Passive :

"Divine Protection of the Death God" : Whenever Theresia hits a survivor, they are inflicted with "Cursed Wound". Anyone who receives it will get a speed reduction of 5% when she is 5 meters near them. If this effect is taking place, the survivor will have a black shadow oozing out of their injury.

"Mad Obsession" : After chasing a survivor for more than 15 seconds, they are inflicted with "Mad Obsession". If a survivor with this effect tries to stun her, she will instead be greatly slowed for the duration of the supposed stun and an additional 1.5 second with less slow. After escaping chase, the survivor's "Mad Obsession" will be cancelled out. The core in her chest will glow if this is taking effect.

Active Skills :

"Sword/Scythe Slash" : Theresia summons her shadow weapon and slashes forth, causing 20 damage. If missed, she is then slowed for 1 second.

Cooldown : 2 seconds
Damage : 20
Windup : 0.5 second
Linger : 1.5 second
Length : 2 meters

"Maddened Dash" : Theresia takes a moment to wind up, for 2 seconds, then shadows will form around her. Soon after, she will be given a speed boost by 15% percent. This effect will last for 10 seconds and she will be slowed down for 2 seconds right after.

Cooldown : 45 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 10 seconds
Length : N/A

"Shadow Pierce/Death's Greeting" : Theresia winds up for a short period of time (0.5 second), quickly getting into a stabbing stance and summoning shadows around her blade. Then, she will stab her shadow sword straight while slightly dashing forward. This will inflict those hit with "Bleeding" for 4 seconds. If "Death God", is activated the skill will change into "Death's Greeting", where she will standsl still and charges up power. After 2 seconds, she will release forth a horizontal "Area-of-Effect" projectile that slices through the air while dealing 65% more damage. She will be slowed for 4 seconds if missed and 2 seconds if hit.

Cooldown : 25 seconds
Damage : 20/33
Windup : 0.5 second/2 seconds
Linger : 2 seconds/ 5 seconds
Length : 3.5 meters/ 30 meters

"The Goddess Of Death" : Theresia stand still for 4 seconds, the shadows on half her body will stretch to cover her whole and oozes out around her as an aura. Her eyes will glow a bloody red and her shadow sword turns to a scythe with spiky shadows. Her strikes will be longer in range, but she will be slowed for 2 seconds if missed. This will only stack once when all survivors are inflicted with "Cursed Wound", and will last permanently.

Cooldown : N/A (one-use)
Damage : N/A
Windup : 4 seconds
Linger : N/A
Length : N/A

"No Escape From Death" : Theresia stands still for 2 seconds as her eyes flashes a bloody, glowing red. For a period of 8 seconds, she can see anyone as long as they are not undetectable.

Cooldown : 35 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 8 seconds
Length : N/A

This was one of the fewer red cards that will soon be created in the void. The entity stared at them thoughtfully, the same sadistic smile plastered on its face.

It had been planning for a while now, ever since the boy's suffering overescalated. The place had so much negative energy, that it was irresistible to him.

It'll milk this out as long as he can, dry out all the negative energy he could receive then kill them all for real.

After they were dead, it will simply move on to the next world. For years...maybe centuries...it had been doing this.

Over and over, with glee.

- This is all thanks to you, Natsuki Subaru. Heheheh...HAHAHAHAH!

Several bodies floated right behind him, all cased in shadow. One of them was the previous Sword Saint, Theresia van Astrea, located in the outermost left.

Her eyes were closed, a dark core embedded in her chest as a red light shone.

In the middle, an all-too familiar figure floated, hair slightly gray. The same orb lodged in his chest, emanating a red glow.

They were two amongst the few others. Each orb in their chest shining a different coloured glow.

All of them were connected by a chain alike energy, shining black and white. It all connected towards the entity who observed the cards.

In its hand, it formed another card, text being written by a mysterious flow of energy.

- Now that the pieces are all here, it's time to place them in their positions...

It grinned widely, its energy oozing out. Its excitement showing in its face, a white curved line shaped to a smile.

What reactions would they have? It wondered. It wanted them to despair. To regret. To suffer. So it may attain power. More power. It wanted more. It thirsted for more. Hungered for more.

And so, it laughed.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Garfiel and Otto stood outside the huge mansion, in its yard. The demi-human was beating his frustration out on a standing wooden log.

The merchant was busy drinking away his sorrows and guilt with a bottle of wine he got from the cellar.

- Is this...really okay?

The boy dressed in a green outfit muttered.

- ...Huh?

- Can we ever forgive ourselves for this...?

Otto's eyes tensed, taking another sip at the bottle.

- What? Ya think I've forgiven myself?!

The blonde demi-human rebuked his words, determination clear.

- Damn it...! HOW USELESS ARE WE?! COULDN'T WE DO ANY MORE FOR HIM?!

He threw his bottle away forcefully, shattering as it landed on the ground.

- ...
Garfiel was stunned, his usually calm and collected friend lashing out at him.

- HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW?! I JUST...I didn't...I didn't want this to happen-

He gritted his teeth, clenching his fists so hard they threatened to draw their own blood.

- WHY COULDN'T YOU AND RAM DO ANYTHING MORE?! DIDN'T YOU VISIT HIM?!

- HUH?! ARE YA REALLY BLAMING US FOR THIS?! WE DIDN'T EVEN REMEMBER SHIT! WHAT ABOUT YOU?! Not once...NOT ONCE DID YOU EVEN COME, SO YOU DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO-

- I GET IT! ALRIGHT?! I didn't go...I didn't visit once...I just, I just let him die.

Otto muttered as he clutched his hair tightly, his tears falling to the ground..

- It's...It's our fault...

- ENOUGH, YA BASTARD! Shit...I'm leaving! Damn it...!

His captain had left him, like his...

The blonde demi-human yelled in fury, recalling something he should've...something he should've moved on from. The log broke as he punched it, leaving it in pieces.

The two glared at each other as Garfiel left, regret and guilt flashing in Otto's expression.

- To hell with this camp...SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!

Otto kicked the ground, face still red from the wine. He didn't want to be here any longer, Subaru was the one who gave him his place here, so why should he stay when he violated their friendship?

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was supposed to be only a normal day for the people in the Miload Manor. Except for the fact that they had forgotten and condemned the one that every resident considered their friend.

Natsuki Subaru.

The half-elf's knight, the spirit's true contractor, the sleeping girl's hero, the maid's little brother, the shield's boss, the merchant's friend. The mage's missing piece.

Otto had already announced his retirement from the camp and left a black tome to Roswaal. He simply couldn't bear to continue this any longer, the guilt was too much for him.

They gathered around the dining table seated, mood noticeably sorrowful and somber. No one spoke, couldn't whisper out any words in the deafening silence.

Shame and regret burned in their hearts, even in the court magician's.

For years, he has planned and planned. All so he may achieve his goals, to revive his beloved teacher. It costed him alot. His humanity, his morals...his everything.

He gave it all up so he may bring her to life once again.

Emilia and Beatrice were a mess, too. Tears still flowing out from their eyes, the latter lowly muttering out pleas for forgiveness, all going unheard. The half-elf had to resist lashing out and letting her magic run wild as she sobbed.

Ram looked unusually down, yet she has to stay strong. Not for herself, but for her sister, who right now was mourning Subaru's death in her room.

She can't get up yet, her legs had no strength, so she had to rest and couldn't be included in this meeting.

Garfiel looked like he was about to punch himself, his own stupid self. For believing that his captain could ever be one of those cultists. For lashing out at his friend Otto.

The servants stood still, their expressions stern.

- You servants may leave. The meeting will now begin.

Roswaal ordered, voice commanding. There was no hint of amusement or play in his voice or gesture he usually had, just serious and tense.

Each of them exited one by one, Petra still crying as Frederica and some of them tried to comfort her.

He failed his boss and his family. Could he even call himself their shield?

How could they ever forget? When he had helped them so much, this was all he was getting in return?

A betrayal. One that stung even the soul, one that probably hurt the most for the raven-haired boy.

No one could ask for forgiveness, he was now a corpse? So, how could they?

- ...what the hell is this meeting even for?

Garfiel choked out lowly, yet slightly audible to the people around him. He looked pretty drained, just getting into a fight with his friend. And that caused Otto to leave.

- Roswaal...why?

Emilia asked, trying to dry away her tears with a handkerchief.

- I didn't want to inform you all of this so soon, but we must act quickly.

- H-huh?

Garfiel, to be honest, was shocked. Act? On what? Their captain was dead. Subaru was dead. So what else could they do?

- Oi, clown. Are ya jokin' with us right now?! What kind of bullshit are you coming up with this time?!

The teen lashed out, anger burning in his face. Then, the mage stood up, grabbing a familiar tome from his pocket. He opened the book, scanning and skipping its pages.

- Natsuki Subaru will return.

The mage stated clearly, loud and simple enough so they may understand...yet...

-Roswaal, What do you mean by...that?

Emilia asked lowly. An understandable question, given the situation.

- But...Roswaal-sama, I swear I saw it burn before my very eyes...

The pink-haired maid reasoned, trying to find a cause of how the book even continued to exist.

Then, the court magician smiled.

- Otto-kun managed to get it repaired, though he had already announced his departure. A loss, but we must simply continue on.

- That doesn't explain how Barusu-

- No, he's alive. I'm verryyy~ sure of it.

He knew it. Believed it. That the boy would overcome even death. After all, he was the one who had braved through Roswaal's challenges head first.

Silence, even more deafening than earlier. The shield of the camp's eyes widened, disbelief clear in his expression.

The others around the table looked at him with bated breaths as he slowly opened the tome.

In that instant, Emilia got up, practically jumping and leaving the chair lying on the floor.

- You're...not lying to us, right?

Roswaal nodded, a smile forming on his face. Tears fell from her eyes as she wiped them away.

- I-is this true?! Roswaal, is this really true?!

- Betty's...Betty's Subaru is alive?

The spirit choked out the question, tears still streaming from her eyes. There was no way of her knowing since she had severed what she thought was a false contract. An act that betrayed her very self, and most of all, her true precious contractor.

- Yes, Beatrice. I know all of you are in disbelief, but we must act quick and look for him. Before someone else finds him.

The drill-haired spirit wasn't very excited to hear that, what spirit would? She betrayed and condemned her contractor who only wished for happy moments with her.

Atleast, he is still alive. That's what mattered to her, for now.

It didn't matter if she wasn't forgiven, as long as he was safe. She wouldn't care if he told her to die, she will gladly do it to her miserable self.

She remembered those nights. His ceaseless scratching, his whimpering, his sobs, his regrets, his failures.

The betrayal probably, no...it hurt him for sure. More than she could ever imagine. So she couldn't imagine being forgiven, much less forgive herself.

Beatrice eyes were still red from crying, tear marks around them and on her cheeks.

She regretted alot, they all did. So they all silently vowed, that they would find and protect their dear friend.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Time had passed, and each of them were in their respective rooms, either doing their duties...or just contemplating their choices.

One of the latter was Ram and Roswaal, seated as the maid stayed on his lap. His hand tracing her forehead, a faint light glowing from it.

The girl sighed in relief, as if a weight was off of her shoulders, giving her a little bit of strength.

- ...Roswaal-sama. Can Ram, no, all of us really trust that book?

She questioned, voice low and worried.

She was concerned that it may leave them to even more precarious circumstances. After all, it has caused more trouble than none.

- I've seen it, Ram.

- Huh?

She muttered in confusion.

- How he got through all the obstacles I set for him. All dating back to before he even got here.

Roswaal answered, expression thoughtful. The maid listened silently.

- I thought I had won perfectly, but he flipped the table around so magnificently. He's done the impossible, this time he's merely won against death.

- But...that doesn't explain how he even...

The girl argued, trying to reason things out. She simply couldn't believe it was possible. Or maybe...

- A divine protection?

- Precisely. I commend you, Ram. He may have the Divine Protection of the Phoenix, allowing its user to regain their life after death.

Ram nodded, understanding the implication, yet a doubt lingered in her mind.

- But, Roswaal-sama. Knowing how...he had been, we'd know if he had a divine protection or not.

Recalling him felt painful, undeserving. She had severed the very bond he created for them, she had no right ever remembering him.

Yes, it was Gluttony's fault, but she was the one who made the final decision to make him her enemy.

- Ohhh~ you don't know, dear Ram. Subaru-kun is hiding more than you'd think.

The magician smiled creepily, as if he had saw into the boy, if even just a little.

The girl did not know what he kept from them, knowing how friendly and...carefree he was. She considered him as her little brother, someone she could tease.

Now, she did not know how to view him. An unfortunate soul? A victim?

She remembered the few times she visited the boy in his cell, still forgotten. He seemed withdrawn, as if his spirit had tired and gaven up.

The last time all of them saw him was in the day he was executed. Although, he was masked and his identity kept hidden by the Wise Men's orders. His movement seemed lifeless, as if everything didn't matter to him anymore.

Some rats they were. They were always ready to use and throw him away. They didn't want to risk being near an archbishop, but at the same time, did not want to be in a risky situation if he did turn out to be innocent.

It played out in their favor, the identity of the Archbishop of Pride was kept hidden. Now, that his name was returned, no one would even know that they had watched him die. Except for the few ones, which was some of the people in each camp.

What could they do? Tell the people the truth? But it would damage the Royal Selection, and may reduce Emilia's standing in the competition...and it felt disgusting. That she was still thinking of this when she let a tragedy like that happen.

She regretted...no, all of them probably, what they had done for him. Nothing. Nothing but insults and malice thrown at him.

After getting no response from the supposed Archbishop, they decided that it would be wise to find a solution themselves.

They abandoned him, lending no help or any consideration whatsoever. They were sure, so sure, that he was an archbishop.

And that proved to be their biggest mistake yet.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Emilia laid still on her bed on her stomach, eyes lost and distracted. In her hand, was a plushie of Subaru.

After all this time, there were still no signs of Puck showing up.

She held it so tightly, as if it could dissapear at any moment. She remembered when he made and gave one of these toys for each of them.

He made twice of each and keep the rest in his room. He said it was so he could remember them anytime he wanted to. While they could keep their own as a gift.

The half-elf sobbed, clutching the tightness around her chest. As if a knife had pierced through her heart.

It hurt. It hurt her. She abandoned him. The one who always tried to help her. One of the kindest soul she'd ever met. The one who professed his love for her.

The tears wetted the pure white sheets under her, overflowing nonstop.

A storm of regret surged in her heart. A traitor, she was. A liar, she was. They promised they would help each other, yet it seemed that it was only the boy that kept his side of the promise.

Was she really a good girl? She couldn't be. She couldn't keep her promise.

What would she say when they met again? Sorry? After all they've done, a sorry wasn't enough. She wished there was more they could do for him.

Sorry is not enough, and will never be.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Inside the mansion, in a room previously owned by Subaru and Beatrice, a figure with blue hair laid on the bed. Another one with spiraling hair sat on a chair beside her.

Rem was expressionless, her expression unreadable. The spirit was still sobbing, bringing her knees and head towards each other as she sat.

- What was his last...words?

The blue-haired girl asked, voice down and somber.

- ...Betty...she does not know...sorry, sorry...

- I see...

She looked at her hands, clear and free from any scars or calluses. They still remembered Subaru's touch, its warmth, its texture.

Then, Rem sobbed.

- Why hadn't...Why hadn't anyone done anything?

Ram told her that Subaru would often come to her room and tell her stories while she was in a coma. He didn't give up ever, he endured for her. He didn't forget her, not even Gluttony could make him.

So why? Why were they so useless? Why...why was she so useless? Why was she just sleeping around while he suffered?

She tried to wipe away her tears, an attempt useless as more and more continued to fall.

- Thank you...and sorry...Subaru...Rem loves you...

He never gave up on her. So now it was her turn to pay back the favor.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In the servant's break room, several of them gathered around Petra including Frederica. They comforted the young girl who was grieving Subaru's loss. The news kept secret from them.

- He's...he's dead...

- Oh, I'm so sorry, dear Petra...

She sat on a chair, the others gathering around her, trying to ease her pain any way they could. Frederica hugged her as tightly as she could.

- L-look, I'm doing the Subaru pose!

A male butler named Shed Lee T. Sky imitated the hero's supposed pose while forcing a smile. He twisted his body, pointing up to the sky.

- Dude...are you stupid?

His friend Onex O. Nekks reprimanded. Petra's sobbing intensified, causing the blonde maid to glare at them. Their spines shivered for a moment.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Each and every one of them battled with something from the inside.

Their failings. Their shortcomings. Their failures.

All of this happening while the Entity watched in amusement, excited for what's to come.

- First up...is you.

The body of the previous Sword Saint emanated the same dark energy it exhibited.

A portal-like crack formed in front of him, showing a structure similar to a tomb, made of mostly stone. It gave off strange feelings. It was located near a field of flowers, outside the city of Lugunica.

Inside it, held the physical body of Theresia van Astrea. Her soul held captive by the mysterious entity.

On surface, it seemed nothing was wrong. But something was waiting. Waiting for its chance to strike.

The night still continued on, the Miload residents now retired in their bedrooms. Each of them thought, what else could they do? Other than find Subaru?

Must they plead for his forgiveness once they meet again? Will he ever forgive them?

None of them knew, but one thing stayed true in their hearts. That they wouldn't forgive themselves for what they did. What they allowed to happen.

The thoughts didn't stop until their eyes finally closed, escaping into the dream world.

A half-elf sat on the grass in their previous mansion, the boy laying just beside her. They were chatting, bantering like they always did.

He always liked teasing her, making the girl scold the boy and pout.

Then, everything turned dark. The moon that dimly shined dissapeared, darkness devouring her world.

Her knight dissapeared into the shadows, only nothing remaining.

- ...why...?

A pained voice rang, distorted in tone.

Emilia's eyes darted everywhere, trying to find its source.

- why...whywhwhywhywhywhywhywhy-

The voice grew increasingly louder, more distorted and glitchier.

- WHY?!

Her ears rang loudly from the scream, causing the girl to cover them with a pained face.

Then, it grew quiet. Silence enveloping the void. The girls uncovered them, looking for anything that may be in her vicinity.

A figure appeared from under the shadows, its darkness covering its body.

It was completely vantablack, darker than even the void around them. Its face started to crackle, creating a crack that distorted for a moment.

- crackle...crackle...crackle...Em...Emili...tan...sav...m...pl...se...

- SUBARU!

In that instant, the girl reached out to him as she summoned her ice blade. The girl had leaped towards him, or it, in great speeds.

- GIVE HIM BACK!

She yelled in anger, slashing the figure in shadows. But it merely phased through, causing a part of its body hit to dissipate like smoke.

The crackling on its face ceased, only showing its white elliptical eyes and smiling mouth.

It had two horns atop his head, dark energy flowing out like an aura.

- Heheheheh...just try if you can, mortal.

- You...

Emilia gritted her teeth, anger clearly present in her expression.

- WHAT DID YOU DO TO SUBARU?!

- Who knows? Maybe I've taken his soul hostage~ along with a few vengeful others...

It laughed mockingly, finding amusement in her rage.

So pathetic she was, it thought. They only cared once they had realized they made a mistake.

They were so...SO PATHETICALLY MORTAL.

What a great feeling it was. To receive all the anger and regret they felt. The sorrow and dissapointment.

It was exhilirating. And it's all thanks to the boy they've forsaken.

- If you want to save him...come find the boy's resting place.

- Resting place...? His grave...

She remembered that the archbishop's body was stored somewhere in the Capital. All attempts of getting rid of it was futile, even the Sword Saint couldn't. Shadows that were pretty much indestructible covered him the instant any attempt in harming it was tried.

So, it had to be sealed away. So that the Witch Cult may not get their hands on the supposed Archbishop of Pride.

They concluded it was part of his authority, maybe making his body unable to be vanquished after death so his underlings may find a way to revive him.

How foolish they were. They've basically betrayed who the people called a hero and who they called their friend.

- Good luck...mortal. Let us have a fun game.

The entity laughed lowly as the shadows started to dissapear.

- Remember. Not even death will save you.

Everything turned blindingly bright, until Emilia's eyes snapped open.

She immediately jolted up, pupils dilated, sweat forming on her forehead. She looked around the room, now bright with the morning light.

The wind blew against the flowing white curtains, her plushie of Subaru on top of the night stand beside the bed

She must tell everyone this information. It was crucial, for Subaru...and maybe the others who had been taken hostage.

They had to save him, else they would be failing him all over again.

- Please...don't leave me, Subaru...

She kissed the plushie's forehead, a tear falling on it.

Emilia brought it into her arms, embracing it tightly in her lonesome.

She must bring him back. Bring Subaru back, and say sorry as much as she could.

No matter what.

Chapter Text

Otto sighed, yesterday was not his best day. He found out that he had basically abandoned his best friend, Natsuki Subaru, after being forgotten. He heard that they kept him imprisoned, but he never really bothered to check on him. Not that he had any memories of the boy then, but it still stung.

He left the Emilia camp, his place there had already been destroyed the moment Subaru died. He was the one who gave the merchant a chance to get that position, so it would've been shameless of him to stay.

Right now, he rode on his carriage. His ground dragon, Frufoo, muttering words only he could understand. No doubt he was trying to comfort Otto, the dragon's loyal friend. They had been through alot together, even getting chased by a literal archbishop.

- Ugh...why'd I have to drink so much?! I really lashed out at Garfiel there...

He whined, his leash on the ground dragon unstable. Frufoo wiggled his head around, causing the merchant to focus once again.

- Alright, alright, sorry!

Still, that means he had broke off his connections with everyone there, the demi-human included. No way in hell were they meeting ever again...after that.

The carriage constantly kept rumbling as they trudged along the rough path, the trees and grass surrounding them. Only the moon, their lantern and the occasional torch that lit up the way for him, so he had to rely on his divine protection to call on some insects that emit light.

After that, he was just quiet. Just thinking and thinking. What if he had done something sooner? What if he had taken a look at Subaru even once? What if...what ifwhatifwhatif-

His thoughts ceased as the carriage bumped up due to a large rock. He needed something to distract himself with...

Then, in the distance, he saw a tomb. Large enough that he could see it, it looked grand...even more so under the moonlight. Maybe he could try checking it out for a moment. A break from his uncomfortable seat didn't sound bad, either.

So he went towards it, its size growing bigger as he got closer and closer. He noticed that there was a statue of the Sword Saintess, Theresia van Astrea constructed just outside of the tomb.

Otto stopped the carriage, getting off and letting the ground dragon free from the carriage. Frufoo laid on the ground and rested, its eyes closing.

- Oh, you must be tired. Well, just sleep and I'll come back in a bit.

The ground dragon huffed as a response and continued his slumber. Then, the merchant walked towards the structure. The entrance to it had to be accessed through its stairs, so he got up them.

Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step.

As he finally got near its entrance, he looked at the statue. A girl dressed in knightly robes holding a sword in her hands, its blade connecting to its stone base. It was accurate down to every detail, completely imaging the Sword Saintess.

- Huh? You are...

A familiar voice rang just behind him, their presence made clear to him. This caused Otto's eyes to immediately flicker towards them.

- Uh...wait, you are...Wil-Wilhelm van Astrea?!

The merchant yelled in shock.

- No need to be so frightened. Otto-dono, was it?

The old butler greeted, bowing to the boy in the green outfit.

- Yeah...are you visiting your wife's grave?

- I've already done it. I merely wanted to check on her tomb here.

Otto nodded, his earlier panic finally settling down. God, that fight really was still affecting him until now.

- Wait...Astrea-san, isn't her grave...supposed to be here?

The boy questioned. What he knew was that this particular structure was built solely as the resting place for the Sword Saintess, who had died in battle against the White Whale. It was made to honor her time of service to the kingdom.

- Yes, that is true. But my wife has never been one to ask for such grand things. Although, her body is kept here, I've asked for a grave to be made for her in a separate location long ago.

The old man responded, his voice reminiscing of his deceased partner.

- Oh, sorry for bringing it up!

- Worry not, Otto-dono. I'm not one to get sensitive over questions like that.

Though, he might stab you if you insult Theresia or something. Maybe.

- You really are different from the rumors, huh, Astrea-san.

Otto commented, recalling that people called him the "Sword Demon". Or that he may kill you on the spot if you get on his nerves or something.

- One shouldn't ignorantly believe such baseless words...Like what had happened to Natsuki-dono.

Wilhelm muttered, clenching his fists as he remembered the boy. He struggled to keep the anger from flaring in his eyes, particularly aimed towards a certain healer.

- ...Yeah, that's true. Even now, I still regret it. If I had done something, maybe that wouldn't have happened.

- Otto-dono, I would advise against that way of thinking. What had been done already happened, there is simply no turning back time. You can only make up for him by living your life as you see fit.

The merchant looked down thoughtfully, thinking about his choices. What else could he do in the future?

- There is no need to rush your thoughts, take your time. You are still young, after all.

For a moment, the sword demon smiled as the boy reminded him a bit of Subaru.

- Thanks, Astrea-san.

- I humbly accept your thanks. But, what could you be doing here, of all places? Were you perhaps a fan of my wife?

Wilhelm blurted out "fan", which was clearly a Subaruism exclusive to their camp.

- Uhm...Did Subaru teach you any words...? Any strange words?

- Indeed. He has taught me a variety of spoken words the young ones use nowadays.

Otto couldn't help form a small smile, Subaru had always been like that. Even the renowed Sword Demon had been affected by him, his antics, his friendliness. He remembered when the boy bragged about being friends with Wilhelm.

Those days will never return. He sighed, expression down in energy.

- Otto-dono?

The old man called out, noticing the boy had spaced out.

- Oh...! Well, actually I just wanted to take a break and maybe look around the place.

He snapped out of his thoughts, surprised by the sudden call.

- Hmm...would you perhaps like to come with me? I'm here to visit her tomb, after all.

- Well, if you're okay with it, Astrea-san.

The old man nodded. He walked towards the entrance, gesturing the merchant to come follow him.

- Then, let us go.

Otto smiled, walking just behind the Sword Demon. Maybe...some company would distract his mind for now. He really needed to get over his thoughts of Subaru, else he'd spiral all over again.

The gate of the tomb creaked open, its luxuriousness showed off. It only had one huge room, the inside being pretty spacious, and even designed with golden furniture and items. Paintings of the Sword Saintess' feats plastered against the walls, the blades she had used in battle were placed like items in a museum.

The room was dimly lit with blue crystals, their only source of light other than the moonlight from the windows.

And in the middle, was her tomb. It was black and yellow in color, with a red gem alike the dragon priestess' insignias in the center. He looked at the ceiling, where a radial glass window was placed for the moonlight to seep through.

- Wow, this place is impressive.

- Though, my wife wouldn't ever approve of this. It was by the kingdom's order for it to be constructed.

They walked towards the Sword Saintess' tomb, their footsteps echoing loudly. Otto noticed the sudden chill he got, but ignored it.

- So this is it, huh?

- Yes, here lies the body of my wife, Theresia van Astrea. In the past, we hadn't recovered it, but after the witch cult's attack and doings, we had finally recovered her.

After all those years of him chasing after the White Whale, seeking for a chance to get revenge, he had finally done it. They were even able to retrieve her body after the events of Priestella.

Wilhelm's eyes tensed as he remembered the Siege of Priestella, where he found out that they had stolen the Sword Saintess' body and used it for battle. Where the boy was forgotten and caught in the middle of a battlefield.

Maybe he regretted it too, of not being able to do anything for him. Subaru helped him to avenge his wife, a debt so huge he wouldn't dream of repaying it. That was why he hated Felix now, for his rash actions. The feline hadn't thought about it at all, and acted on impulse.

Sure, the healer was in a panic. His lady was sick and cursed, and he couldn't do anything about it. His only source of information was the supposed archbishop, who constantly "lied" and never told him anything. But, couldn't he give more consideration? Couldn't he do anything else other than to torture?

If anything, the blame should be pinned on the archbishop. He caused all of this from the start, so it was his doing. He shouldn't blame Felix for...

It's difficult, it's complicated. It was clearly the archbishop's fault, yet why couldn't Felix be more moral? He had breached his own code as a healer and used his magic to hurt, rather than to heal. Even if he should show sympathy for the healer, he had gone too far.

Otto had noticed the man's silence, the evergrowing bloodlust emanating from him.

- Uhm...Astrea-san?

No response.

- Astrea-san?

Wilhelm regained his focus as the merchant called him for the second time, the first one being completely inaudible to him.

- Oh...Forgive me for that, Otto-dono. It seems the situation has stressed our minds out. Shall we just leave?

- Well, I guess enough time has passed. I also need to look for a job now...

- Hm? Did anything happen with your camp, Otto-dono? I've heard from Felix you were the Head of Internal Affairs.

The old man questioned, why would the boy need another job? Did he perhaps cut off his connections with them?

- It's not really a fun story. I just didn't want to be there, I don't feel like I deserve to...after his death.

- I see. A choice I can understand. Subaru-dono had always told me about you and his other friends. It must feel terrible for you.

Otto grimaced, terrible indeed. The worst kind of terrible. His friend was forgotten and tortured, and none of them did anything about it. It's all because of that damned Gluttony, if he could, he'd strangle that vile crap even if it killed him.

- I guess we should go now. It's already so late.

The old man nodded, looking up at the dark night sky above. The stars still continued to twinkle, the moon shining, the air brushing across everything. Even after Subaru died, time can only continue to move. The least they could do is to live happily for him.

Otto did not want Subaru to see him, not ever again. He didn't want his friend to glare at him hatefully, he was scared of that. He didn't want to think about it.

As the two turned their backs, a shadow crept up from behind. Unknown to even the Sword Demon, ignoring the warrior's sense of danger.

- Andd.... Where the hell do you think you are going~?

- Huh-

A distorted voice rang from behind, surprising the duo. As they quickly turned around, only darkness met them.

- HAHAHAH! CAUGHT YOU!

The entity laughed, covering them in its shadows. It felt suffocating. He could feel all the negativities it emitted. Hatred. Sorrow. Guilt. You name it all. It was like he was underwater, dark and heavy.

Yet, everything felt heavy. He felt like his flesh could rupture at any moment, the amount of pressure could kill anyone, but they were still alive. His body dropped down, failing to function properly. Wilhelm could barely stand, and couldn't even talk. He was gritting his teeth, trying to resist the pressure.

His vision started to go dark and blurry, the only last thing he saw was the Sword Demon slowly succumbing alongside him.

And then, darkness.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The demi-human Felix Argyle hadn't come out of his lady's room ever since Subaru's name came back. His hands couldn't resist themselves from trembling when he looked at them, he remembered every time he used his healing magic to...

He didn't want to remember...He didn't want to. he didn't want to.

- F-Felix...what of th-the boy...?

The duchess asked, having regained her memories. Still, she was afflicted with the curse that flowed within her. The woman could barely mutter any words out, her expression weak.

- Crusch-sama...I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...He...We killed-

He sobbed, unable to finish his words. He tried to cover them, not wanting any tears to fall, yet they merely slipped through his fingers.

Subaru might've really been the only one that could save his lady. What would the other knights think of him now?

What should he do...? What should he do, what should he do, what should he do-

- Killed...Is he...

- Felix is sorry...I'm sorry..I'm sorry...!

No one could comfort him right now, but would he even deserve it? He's tortured someone using water magic, something a healer shouldn't ever do. He was desperate...his lady needed help. He had to do something, but he wasn't thinking right.

- Enou...h...I will...I will decide on w-what to...do with you...later...

Crusch had already passed out from the pain and exhaustion, the healer trying his best to ease her pain any way possible with his magic. With the same hands he used to torture a friend.

Wilhelm wasn't here so he had to stay here to guard and heal her, since their lady wanted to give him a chance to rest for the night. The butler barely left her side ever since she was cursed and was always guarding her, so she wanted him to rest if even just a bit.

For hours, he hadn't returned. But that wasn't something he had to be concerned on for now, he had to focus on comforting his lady at all costs. He can't heal her, so it was the best the healer could do.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The next day, all of the residents in the Miload manor were gathered outside, the servants, maids, and butlers seeing their masters off on a mission to the Capital to find and retrieve Subaru.

- Then, we humbly pray for your safety.

All of them said in unison, bowing as the group consisting of Emilia, Roswaal, Ram, Beatrice, and Garfiel made their exit. None of them said a word to each other, their thoughts drowned by the possibilities they overthought of.

What will Subaru think? Will he want to see them again? Will he hate them? Will he push them away?

The atmosphere in the carriage was tense, like knives were pointed at every direction. Not a single word has been uttered, just silence and the constant rumbling of the transportation.

- If...Roswaal, If Subaru is really alive, would he...even want to meet us?

Emilia broke the silence, asking the question they've been comtemplating all morning long. There were still tear marks on her cheeks, her expression downcast.

- I do nooot~ know, Emilia-sama. But, if his loyalty to you still holds, then it is merely up to us to make up for our wrongdoing~.

The clown answered, now gaining his usual demeanor back. It seems the chance of getting the boy back on their side had fueled him. He remembered all the crap Subaru pulled for Emilia, so maybe...just maybe he could still get his piece back in place.

- It doesn't matter if Betty's Subaru...doesn't forgive us. Betty merely wants to see him alive and well, that's all that matters, I suppose...

- Don't be so down nooow~, Beatrice. We have yet to see him, so-

Roswaal tried to reassure, he really wants them to really try and get Subaru to join them back. At any cost.

- QUIT LYING, I SUPPOSE! B-betty...We made a promise, that we would always hold hands, and create memories Betty would never forget. But...Betty abandoned him! BETTY WILL NEVER BE FORGIVEN!

The spirit spilled out, her face red as tears threatened to fall.

- ...Yes, you may be right. Subaru-kun may never forgive us, but would you be able to forgive yourselves if he's harmed while he's away from you?

The magician argued, causing Beatrice to glare at him. She looked down with an unreadable expression, clenching her fists.

- I suppose...Betty can atleast see this up until the end...

- I want to convince Subaru to come back...but if he doesn't want to, then...

- No, no, no. Save those thoughts for wheeen~ it happens, Emilia-sama.

Ram was very quiet, just silently absorbing whatever she could. Beatrice was conflicted, should she meet Subaru? Will he be angry at her? What could she do to repent? Atleast, that's what her expression was saying.

Emilia seemed...determined, angry even. She seemed impatient to see him again, the constant look of worry and concern flashing in her face. Roswaal just...seemed like his usual self, but what could he be truly feeling in the inside? Anxious, maybe? He really liked masking his emotions so it's hard to tell.

As for herself, she just felt lost. How should she view Subaru now? Every time their eyes met in that cell, his always seemed dejected. Can she really allow herself near the boy?

Her sister felt anger towards them and for herself, for letting this happen. To calm her down, she told Rem about Subaru's situation and managed to ease her wrath.

- Uhm...say, did any of you have...a weird dream?

The half-elf finally questioned, as if confessing something she had been keeping. Her heart felt heavy trying to recall it.

- About what, Emilia-sama~?

- Uhm...there was this weird figure...and it said it was keeping Subaru hostage.

The other three in the carriage looked at her thoughtfully, trying to recall something.

- Hm...I'm afraiiiid~ not, but I do remember dreaming about a certain alleyway in the Capital just located near the market district. Perhaps that's where we're being pointed to?

Roswaal responded, finally remembering the strange dream...or memory? If he had to describe it, he was lying down on the floor as Emilia healed him. He couldn't really look around, as if he was seeing from someone's point of view. Strange, really.

Perhaps...I may have touched a little of the surface his ability has.

- But I vividly remember the entity mentioning his...resting place.

- Hm...then, we'll go check that first, then move on to the alleyway if we still don't find Subaru-kun.

The two then looked towards Beatrice, wanting to know if there was anything she has to say. The spirit looked at them with a hesitating expression, clearly troubled.

- Betty won't...Betty won't tell you anything...her memories with Subaru is only for herself.

- Beatrice...you're trembling. Are you alright?

Emilia whispered, noticing how the spirit's body had suddenly started to shake.

No, no, no. She did not want to remember, she didn't want to. It hurt, too much. Just recalling it caused a phantom pain in her belly, the pain of being sliced open. The horror of dying. It hurt, it was scary, she did not want to remember.

- Please...just ignore Betty. Betty will be fine...

The half-elf looked at her in worry for a moment, then sighed. She still had Subaru to worry about, and she did not want the spirit to get angry again.

- Then, if you say so, Beatrice.

The mage looked at the blonde spirit for a moment, scanning her every gesture, her expressions.

A small smile played on his lips, his mind trying to piece a puzzle.

- Oi! We're here.

Garfiel called out, opening the carriage's door. The demi-human seemed upset and unstable, his every movement felt like it had anger mixed with it.

The four got up, leaving it one by one, the teen closing it forcefully. They looked around the surroundings, the ground dragon and carriage parked in the stable along with many others in each space. They exited the stables, located just near the Capital's castle.

The castle just in front of them was as grand and luxurious as ever, the guards overlooking its front gates carrying a menacing aura. They constantly stopped those expensive-looking carriages and inspected the supposed visitors. Then, they looked towards the city.

Civilians walking about, dragon carriages trudging along the street, vendors selling their products and inviting customers in. There were many buildings, too many for them to count.

It took them a while, but they had finally found the place where they had kept his body. Knights constantly strolled around the structure, patrolling and guarding it. It didn't look any different from when it was first built, a colorless gray. Mold had started to form around the walls, no sign of any cleaning done since.

It seems the Wise Men hasn't made the news public, probably for the Royal Selection. It would completely destroy the event if everyone in the kingdom knew the truth, so it had to be kept hidden for now.

- How should we get inside?

Ram asked, brainstorming for any possible solutions. Should they wait until night where security may be most vulnerable?

- Simple! I'll blast 'em away while you go save captain!

- As much as I'd like to do that, we must do this discreeeeetly~, as to not attract any unwanted attention~.

The mage snickered for a moment.

- Huh?! Th' hell are you on about, clown? We have to save captain right no-

- Garfiel, please, just listen to Roswaal-sama.

Ram interrupted before more ideas could form in his mind. The teen spat on the ground, glaring at the magician fiercely. He looked very angry and impatient, he was barely able to contain himself.

- Right now, the supposed Archbishop of Pride's identity is hidden. The knights being here is to serve that purpose, to guard the body until they can officially announce his death in a safe period of time. Most probably some time after the Royal Selection, so that it can continue on without any more disturbances.

- B-but this isn't right, Roswaal. Aren't we lying to the people?

Emilia asked hesitatingly, she looked conflicted in what to do. Risk her standing in the Selection and tell everyone the truth, or keep it until it was safe to do so. The latter seemed more logical, but she wasn't comfortable with it. It wasn't right, not moral, not how she was taught.

- Emilia-sama, please just trust me this once. After all, you still have a goal to become queen, right?

The mage reminded her of the forest she had yet to unfreeze, and the discrimination she wished to cease.

- Alright...

The girl accepted with faint doubt, questioning her entire identity. What she was doing didn't feel right, but she must still do it anyways.

- I imagine that they won't give even the camps a pass inside, so we have to look for another way in. They are mostly vulnerable at night, so we will take the chance to sneak in and take a look.

The group nodded, they understood that doing it in daylight pretty much risked exposure so it was night, or maybe midnight that they could take their chances.

- In the meantime, shall we look at the alleyways?

- I suppose...We might find Subaru somewhere in this city rather than here...

Beatrice silently agreed, it was better than waiting until night time. Right now, time was better spent distracted rather than waiting. She didn't want to remember THAT.

- Then, let us depart~

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The hours ticked away as they searched around the area, scanning every nook and cranny for any signs of the raven-haired boy. The group had pretty much searched the entire area, down to every corner, except for this last one.

The group approached the empty area, hearing inaudible sounds from within.

- Jus...wh...s...thi...pla...any...ay-?

A voice from a young man rang, someone all too familiar with them. The moment she heard that, Emilia sprang up and immediately sprinted. Garfiel followed as he dashed, while the last 3 of them followed, faces noticeably tense.

The two running towards the source of the voice turned the corner, sweat dropping from their foreheads. A figure dressed in black, orange and white sat on the small set of stairs.

Then, their eyes met, his hazelnut and her amethyst pupils.

- SUBARU!

- CAPTAIN!

- Huh...?

The girl didn't think twice to dive towards him, pinning the boy on the concrete ground. She locked her arms around his neck, embracing him as tightly as she could. Tears streamed from her eyes, the boy completely stunned.

- I'M SORRY! SUBARU! I'm sorry, i'm sorry! I'm really sorry! I won't leave you anymore! I promise! I'm so sorry for leaving you alone!

She repeatedly apologized, sobbing as she did.

- CAPTAIN! YOU...You're...

As much as Garfiel wanted to join in, he had to respect the reunion between the two. He stood there in shock, a wave of relief washing over him. So, it was really true...Subaru was still alive.

- Uh...

The raven-haired boy muttered, sounding utterly confused and surprised. But hey, a hug from a girl wasn't a bad start to his journey, right? But why was she apologizing? Did she mistake him for someone else?

- You guys...

The last three of the group arrived at the alleyway, faces in disbelief except for the tall man with dark blue hair. The blonde girl looked at him with a longing expression, The pink-haired one stared at him with downcast eyes, as if guilt hid beneath them.

- Who...

The boy dressed in a tracksuit muttered, silencing them.

- Who is Subaru?

Their hearts dropped in that moment, as the boy looked at them troubledly.

Chapter Text

The group looked at the boy strangely, clearly hiding something from him. He did not know, but he could somehow sense it just from the atmosphere alone. The surprised look on their faces only served to fuel that feeling. The girl who had embraced him had stood up, away from him.

Weird people, he thought. He shouldn't get involved with them.

- I'm sorry, but I have to go now-

- WAIT! Please...at least hear us out.

The girl with silver hair begged, her tears still streaming down as they fell to the ground.

This wasn't good, he shouldn't make a girl cry like this. Well, he can follow them for a bit and see what happens.

- Oh, alright then...I can trust you guys...right?

He asked with worry and concern for himself, he remembered nothing, he was confused. Now these people somehow arrive in the perfect time to help him, something was probably at play here.

The group felt bad as soon as he questioned them, he was clearly suspicious of them, something that terribly hurt. But it was only deserved, it was karma at its finest.

- ...you can trust us, Subaru-kun. We won't hurt you. Please, follow us.

Said the man with blue hair and clown make-up lowly. The boy nodded, face still anxious. He just silently hoped that nothing bad will happen. He followed the clown as he exited the alleyway, the group following them silently.

They trudged along the sidewalk of a street in the market district, getting glances from onlookers and passerby's. Though, none of them approached the group. He noticed the many vendors and stalls, along with the weird signs and symbols on each product.

- Uhm...so was I mistaken for someone else or?

He queried, wondering why they had reacted like that towards him earlier.

- No, no. Uhm...we don't know how to tell you this...

Emilia responded lowly, her eyes down on the ground.

- Subaru-kun...that is your name. Tell me, do you remember nothiiing~?

- No, afraid not, clown guy.

"Subaru" scratched his head, utterly confused on what was going on. First, he had found himself in this strange kingdom. There were many demi-humanoid creatures walking about, and the architecture of the city didn't feel...familiar. As if it was foreign to him.

- Th-this is terrible...but don't worry, Subaru...we will help you, okay?

- O-okay? What's that mean?

The girl with silver hair glanced away from him with an unreadable expression, hiding her clenched fists.

- We will worry about thooose~ words later, for now, let us escooort~ you back to our mansion~.

- A...mansion? Like one of those grand, huge houses?

Roswaal nodded, a small smile playing on his lips.

The other two three following behind them hasn't spoken any words, just silently following. Their faces looked pretty down, and didn't seem to have any courage to talk to him.

None of them felt like they deserved to interact with him, but here they are, granted another chance to start again on a clean plate. This wasn't okay, atleast that's what their conscience screamed. But they couldn't just leave him to fend for himself, either.

That's what they did, and won't ever do again.

Garfiel wasn't as energetic as he used to, just quiet and somber. His failure to protect Subaru, his fight with Otto leading to his retirement from the camp...he felt too guilty.

Ram couldn't get any chances to talk with him, her thoughts flooding her mind. She made Subaru into her enemy, so was this alright? If Subaru left, she didn't want to know how Rem would react, how Roswaal would be broken. So, this had to be done, for her sister and master.

Beatrice felt lost. She should've been happy, glad that he truly was still alive. Yet the fact that they would lie to him like this wasn't right, they were basically dragging him back to his hell. If there was one thing she wished, it was for the boy's happiness. To just live his life away from this political selection.

The spirit remembered his sleepless nights, his ceaseless scratching, his countless sobbing. She remembered what he felt in that loothouse, belly sliced, blood pooling under him.

Was...that the truth of his ability...? She prayed it wasn't, that it was only a nightmare. Just a mere nightmare, ones that always haunted him. Else, she'd had hurt him more than she could ever imagine.

The group had already arrived at the stables, entering and boarding the dragon-drawn carriage. The ground dragon huffed as Garfiel prepared to set off, controlling its movement by the rope.

Its wheels rolled as the creature moved out of its area, exiting the stables. The carriage bumped up and down as they rode along the streets of the Capital, making their exit to go back to their mansion.

- Uh..this is a weird question, but, do you all know me?

The boy questioned, recalling their strange reactions to him like he was familiar to them.

- Hm...yes. It seems you have lost your memory, but I assuuure~ you, Subaru-kun...we used to know you.

- Subaru...that's my name.

The mage nodded, wearing the same unreadable smile.

- Don't worry, Subaru...we'll take care of you until we get this problem fixed...so please, don't...leave us.

Emilia pleaded, wanting to redeem herself for forsaking the boy to his fate.

- Huh? What happened before I, well, lost my memories?

Silence, no one had the courage to utter any words. The group looked at each other, waiting for someone to speak out for them.

- Something terrible~. You must be very confused, but you playeeed~ a vital role in our camp.

- Terrible? Vital? Wh-what...?

The boy's head ached, a feeling of nausea washing over him. It was like his head was being slammed into a wall, he clutched his head in pain.

- Subaru! Are you alright?! Sh-should I heal you?!

Emilia who was sitting in front of Subaru leaned towards him, concern flashing in her face. Hands awkwardly postured, overthinking of what to do.

- N-no, I'm alright...now. Just a headache. Been having those ever since I got here.

- Oh...well then, if it's what you want...

The half-elf leaned back to her position hesitatingly. The blonde girl looked at him for a moment, immediately glancing away as he noticed and looked at her.

- Erm...hello.

Subaru smiled awkwardly, waving at the little girl. Beatrice looked at him with faint hesitation, not knowing how to respond.

- G-greetings...

The spirit lowly greeted, almost inaudible to the boy. Boy was she cute, probably a shy, sheltered girl.

- Are you Roswaal-san's daughter or something?

In that moment, the girl instantly denied.

- N-NO WAY, IN FACT! Oh! Sorry, sorry, sorry...Betty didn't mean to yell-

- Woah, woah, woah, relax. Hahahah...sorry about that. So, you're his little sister?

She shook her head rapidly, her spiral-styled hair flinging around.

- Hm...he's your guardian?

- No...Roswaal is just...he's a friend of Betty's, I suppose.

Subaru nodded, smiling at the blonde girl. Then, he looked at the pink-haired maid giving her the same smile.

- And you are?

Ram looked at him conflicted for a moment, then sighed.

- You may call me Ram, sir.

That's right, she didn't feel like she had the right to call him by name after condemning him to that fate. Right now, they were strangers, so she shouldn't act so familiar with him.

- "Sir"? No need to be so formal! Aren't we all supposed to be-

His words cut short, a gap in his memories trying to fill itself, yet in vain. The boy looked down in thought, wondering what just happened.

- Subaru?

A voice alike silver bells chimed, bringing his attention to the situation back.

- A-ah! Sorry, just memory problems.

Subaru sighed, rubbing his temples. Emilia and Beatrice looked at him with concerned expressions, wanting to help in any way possible but they couldn't gather the courage to.

- Don't worry about it toooo~ much, Subaru-kun. We will help you recover them if you wish so~. But for now, let us wait until we arrive at the manor~.

The mage assured, trying to lend assistance to the struggling boy.

- Yeah...thanks, Roswaal-san.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Time had long since passed since the boy arrived in the mansion, the light from the moon seeping through his room's windows. The wind blew against the curtains, causing them to sway around and around.

He had been introduced to the other residents in the manor, noticing that they had about the same reactions the group who accompanied him did. Shock, disbelief, as if they had seen a ghost.

A young maid with orange hair had sprinted towards him, crying as she hugged him. The boy patted her head awkwardly, as an older blonde maid got her off of him.

He remembered meeting that blue-haired girl, she looked at him like she had missed him for years. The moment he revealed he remembered nothing, it was as if her world was broken.

The night stand beside his bed had a lamp turned on to dimly light the room along with some other wall lamps. Not to be exaggerating, but the room was quite large and luxurious, decorated beautifully with expensive furniture and designs.

On the walls, several paintings were plastered to showcase even more wealth of the family.

Subaru couldn't sleep, every time his eyes closed, an unknown feeling of fear and dread always haunted the depths of his mind. As if anything could harm him at a moment's notice, he didn't want to sleep...

Sighing, the boy got his warm blankets off and stood up from the bed, sweat brimming from his forehead. He picked up a small lantern and walked.

- Thirsty...

His footsteps thudded against the wooden floor, making his way to the door. It creaked open as he turned the knob and pulled. Subaru looked at the dark hallway, no lights on. The furniture and paintings didn't help to give the place an eerie feeling.

- This place looks haunted at night...

The boy trembled as he walked along the hallway, turning on the lantern to light up the surroundings. Moonlight entered through the open windows, serving as a secondary light source for the boy.

He passed along room after room, trying to find the kitchen.

- Let's see...it should be here somewhere.

The room was the last one in the hallway, a dead-end. The boy stopped in his tracks, opening the door. It revealed the kitchen which was equipped with many tools and ingredients.

- Oh, there we go. I just need some water...

Subaru entered the room, his feet stepping on the cold floor. He looked around trying to find a water container and glass, his eyes scanning the counters. He noticed the display shelf with numerous glasses and walked over to it, grabbing one.

He looked for a water container or vessel to get some, and found one near the sink. The boy opened its lid, scooping up water and drinking it.

- PHWAHH! Water's good!

The raven-haired boy cheered, his thirst finally being quenched. He placed the empty glass on the counter, wiping the sides of his mouth.

- Still...this place is so big! And they told me that I was a knight here or something? Seems pretty impossible to me...

He sighed, remembering how much they had praised his past self before losing all of the memories he had. All those amazing achievements...did he really do all of that? It was unbelievable to him.

Something deep inside of him genuinely believed he was incapable of doing anything useful, something that told him he will never match up to their expectations.

It was too much pressure for him, he was the supposed hero who had brought down legendary creatures and figures that had plagued the world. So, he has to regain his memories so he won't dissapoint any of them. They helped him after all, when he was lost in that place.

His mind felt heavy, a feeling of exhaustion washing over him.

- H-huh...? I feel so...sleepy...

He felt a strange presence behind him, but he couldn't turn around. His body merely dropped on the ground, his vision darkening. His eyes felt heavy, trying to resist them closing was basically impossible.

Then, darkness took over his world, only the void existing for him to see.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was already early morning, the birds chirping as the gentle wind whistled through the atmosphere. The scent of grass, flowers and trees flowed through the Miload manor, a smell relaxing to the mind.

Several people had gathered around a lying figure in the kitchen, each looking in worry.

- S-Subaru? Wake up.

A voice chiming like silver bells rang, his eyes slowly opening. His vision slowly adjusted to the bright light surrounding them, a hint of white and purple on their knees just beside him.

- Emilia...? Wh-what...where am I?

- You're in the kitchen. Were you sleepwalking, perhaps?

He slowly sat up, his back terribly aching. It seems sleeping on the floor wasn't a very pleasant experience for his body. His eyes scanned the people gathered around him, looking at the boy bewildered.

- Did you find me here, Emilia-san?

The honorific slightly hurt the half-elf, she wished he would call him that nickname once again. But she had other things to worry about right now.

- No, but the butler there found you lying on the ground. Thankfully, he was quick to inform us of this. You could've caught a cold, you know?

Emilia looked at him with worried eyes, not wanting anything to happen to the raven-haired boy.

- Oh, well...thanks.

Subaru scratched his head, smiling at the half-elf. She nodded, expression unreadable. He got up from the floor, dusting away at his clothes.

- You too there, uh...?

He looked at the butler with brown curly hair.

- You can call me Letsky or Shed, glad I could help.

The man waved at the boy, getting another as a response.

- And you...

He looked at the other butler with green hair beside Shed, which seemed more serious and quiet. The butler with curly hair pushed his arm beside the green-haired butler.

- Onex, sir.

- Ah, I see. Then, nice to meet you, Shed, Onex. Let's be friends, alright?

Shed gave him a small smile, Onex responding with a humble bow.

- You got it.

- I will serve you with my utmost best.

The raven-haired boy scratched his head awkwardly, their uptightness stirring him mentally quite a bit. Then, he glanced at the hint of orange hair and red ribbon beside them.

- Petra-chan, right? Nice to meet you.

Subaru smiled, reaching a hand out to her to shake. The little maid looked at him with trembling eyes, like she was about to cry.

- H-huh?! Oh, what's wrong?!

- Nothing...I'm just glad you're alive, Subaru-nii...

Petra sniffled as she sobbed lightly, some few tears escaping her eyes. Emilia walked over to her and crouched, giving her a hug. The girl warmly accepted it.

- Ah, ahahah... I'm sorry to worry you.

The boy patted her head hesitantly, not knowing how to control the situation as a sweat formed on his cheek.

- ...Y-yeah.

She sniffled, trying to wipe her falling tears. Then, the door opened, a blonde maid entering the kitchen. She looked pretty baffled at the strange gathering. Subaru was trying to comfort the crying Petra, while Emilia and two other butlers stood around them

- My! What have we here?

- Frederica-san! We got a bit of a situation, but Emilia-san's trying to ease it.

The two pulled away from the embrace as the half-elf stood up, facing Frederica. The tall maid smiled at the girl, getting to her level as she leaned down.

- There's no need to shed any more tears, my dear junior. Subaru-sama is here safe and sound, after all.

She reassured Petra, opening her arms for a hug. The girl nodded, a small smile forming on her lips, her cheeks still red.

- Thank you, Frederica-neechan...Emilia-neechan...

- You don't have to thank us, Petra-chan. We're always here for you, and for each other...from now on.

Forever. She won't ever let go of Subaru again, she will repent for what they've done and redeem herself. At any cost. She will keep him, and them safe as long as she remains alive. She won't ever forget Subaru again, she promises to herself.

A promise she vowed to never break, even at the cost of her life. After all, Subaru had paid with his own.

One by one, they had left the room, getting back to their duties and tasks. Petra and the other employees of the mansion had to continue overseeing its cleanliness, and to prepare for breakfast. Emilia had to go talk with the spirits, as it was pretty much part of her daily routine now.

Subaru was left behind in the room, an unreadable expression on his face. Then, a small smile played on his lips.

A faint red glow emitted from his eyes.

Chapter Text

- DAMN YOU! LET ME OUT! GIVE ME BACK MY BODY!

Subaru banged his fists against the indestructible cage of shadows, no sounds emitting from them.

- Nuh-uh~ I still need your body to do my bidding, after all. Just sit there and be a good boy for me, alright?~

The entity clad in darkness mocked, its mouth formed into a wide grin. His anger clearly showed on his face, his pupils glaring with fury he'd never experienced before. After all, his body had been stolen, and all he could do was watch.

The creature fooled the Miload residents quite easily, manipulating them into thinking he was amnesiac and the good person they thought he was. Subaru did not know what was happening, he just randomly found himself in this world of darkness with no memories.

He watched the entity create card after card, either red or white, but the latter mostly greater in number. He did not know what they did, but he knew it wasn't something good. He had to do something, he has to break out somehow, yet there was nothing he could do.

He noticed the floating bodies caged beside him, all of their eyes closed. There was an old butler with multiple swords, and a gray-haired boy around his age dressed in green. He noticed the cards of pure white floating for each of them just in front of their cell.

There was an image for the old man with text below :

- Wilhelm van Astrea

"The Sword Demon"

- "Do not give up for even a second, a moment, or an instant."

Health : 120/120

Stamina : 100/100

Walking Speed : 12

Sprinting Speed :27

Stamina Loss Per Second : 10

Stamina Gain Per Second : 20

Passive :

"Refined Battle Senses" : This will activate when Wilhelm is in chase for more than 25 seconds. When in effect, a faint red aura will appear around him and his abilities are much quicker to release. This will deactivate when not in chase.

Active Skills :

"Old Warrior's Sense" : Wilhelm is given a brief time period of wind-up, then this ability will activate. Once activated, he will be able to dodge any attack or projectile except for Area-Of-Effect abilities. If his passive is activated, there will be no wind-up. If missed, then he will be slowed for 2 seconds.

Cooldown : 35 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 0.5 second/N/A
Linger : 1 second
Length : 1 meter

"Counter-attack" : Upon activation, Wilhelm will be greatly slowed and will get into a defensive stance. If a physical attack is launched at him, he will then parry it and counterattack with a slash, stunning the killer for 1.5 second. If his passive is activated, there will be almost no-wind up. If a projectile lands, he will only parry it away and be given a 3 second speed boost.

Cooldown : 30 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 1 second/0.5 second
Linger : 2 seconds
Length : 1 meter

It was a new card that the entity had made, as one had already been made for Garfiel and Otto. So which one should he make next? It wondered, its eyes scanning the screen-like rifts in space in front.

Then, an idea popped into his head. A white light emanated from nothing as he held out a hand, a familiar rectangular shape forming. The card had a white line separating it into half, an image of a girl with blue hair in the left and one with pink hair in the right.

- Rem/Ram

"The Demon Sisters"

- "Together...my sister and I will survive!"

Health : 80/80

Stamina : 100/100

Walking Speed : 12

Sprinting Speed : 27

Stamina Loss Per Second : 10

Stamina Gain Per Second : 20

Passive :

"Clairvoyance" : The sisters Rem and Ram are alerted to the killer's location when a survivor is hurt or killed, while also revealing the survivor's location for a period of 5 seconds.

Active Skills :

"Two In One" : Rem/Ram will stand still, and a white light will envelop them. The two sisters are able to switch between each other for their singular body. If it's Rem, then they will have blue hair, while pink hair if it's Ram. Their eyes will be different colored, pink and blue either way.

Cooldown : 25 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : N/A
Length : N/A

Rem :

"Healing Hands" : While near another survivor, Rem can interact with them and give them "Healing" for 10 seconds. A total of 50 HP will be recovered if they are not interrupted within the 10 second period but they are left defenseless unless the ability is forcefully cancelled. While healing, a bright blue light will envelop them.

Cooldown : 40 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : N/A
Linger : 10 seconds
Length : 1 meter

"Demon Horn" : Rem uses 1 stack of "Demon Horn" and activates this ability. She is slightly slowed for 1 second, a pink glowing horn growing on her forehead. After that, she is given a great speed boost for 4 seconds. The horn will dissipate after the time period and remove the speed boost. You can only get a stack upon healing a survivor with "Steamed Tato". Caps at 2 stacks.

Cooldown : 30 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 1 second
Linger : 4 seconds
Length : N/A

Ram :

"Steamed Tato" : Ram will throw a boiled tato to any direction she desires, if a survivor is able to pick it up and eat it, they are healed by 20 hp instantly and will continue to heal by 5 for a period of 2 seconds every 1 second. If the survivor is hit within this period, then the extra healing will stop. This totals to 30 HP recovered if not interrupted.

Cooldown : 30 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 1 second
Linger : 2 seconds
Length : 20 meters

""Fura!" : Ram is briefly slowed and casts a Fura spell to form a wind blade, it will shoot towards the direction she wants and will slow the killer for 2 seconds and cause "Bleeding" for 5 seconds if hit. The spell will dissipate once it has passed 30 meters or lands into a wall.

Cooldown : 25 seconds
Damage : 10 and 2/second
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 2 seconds
Length : 30 meters

Then, he looked at the two other besides him which had a crimson red card each. There was a girl with flaming red hair, wearing knightly robes and a...demi-human? A girl too, perhaps? Either way, the one with the animalistic features wore the same outfit as the girl.

Now the feline had a red card in front of her...or him. An image of them and text below.

- Felix Argyle

- "The Ruined Torturer"

- "It's all my fault that she died...so I will recover her at any cost."

Health : 2000/2000
Stamina : 120/120
Walking Speed : 9
Sprinting Speed : 27.5
Stamina Loss Per Second : 10
Stamina Gain Per Second : 20
Terror Radius : 20 meters
Terror Theme : The Murderer (Dusttale)

Passives :

"Flames of Sorrow" : Due to the flames that envelope Felix's body, he will leave off a trail of fire wherever he steps on. Those who touch this fire other than him, will be given the "Burning" effect for 3 seconds, dealing a total of 2 damage per second. They will also be given a speed reduction within the time period, and the timer won't reduce if they don't step out of it.

"Unassailable" : While "Desperate Hunt" is activated, if Felix is stunned during its period, the duration of the stun will be decreased by 1. This decrease can be reduced even more for every time this passive is activated by 0.2. If there is enough reduction to cover the whole duration of the stun, he will only be greatly slowed of its supposed effect period and given a speed boost for 5 seconds.

Active Skills :

"Searing Claws" : Felix will slash his burning claws towards a survivor, dealing 20 damage and causing "Burning" for 3 seconds. The "Burning" effect will deal the afflicted survivor 3 damage per second. If missed, he is then slowed for 1.5 second.

Cooldown : 2 seconds
Damage : 29
Windup : 0.5 second
Linger : 1.5 second
Length : 2 meters

"Blood Boiling" : Felix will lunge forward and attempt to catch a survivor with his claws, if caught, he will then use his magic to boil their blood, dealing a total of 50 damage. If missed, he is left in place for 2 seconds.

Cooldown : 35 seconds
Damage : 50
Windup : 1 second
Linger : 1.5 second
Length : 3 meters

"Hell's Fire" : Felix pierces his right flaming claw on the ground, creating a line of bursting or erupting flames that will form towards any direction he desires. This can also curve to catch survivors off-guard. This will also cause the "Burning" effect upon hit for 3 seconds, slow the survivor down for 1.5 second and give Felix a speed boost for 2 seconds. This ability can also hit multiple survivors if lined right.

Cooldown : 20 seconds
Damage : 10 damage and 3/second
Windup : 2.5 seconds
Linger : 5 seconds
Length : 35 meters

"Devil's Footprint" : Felix smashes his foot into the ground, creating a field of magma that will slow down and cause "Burning" for 3 seconds to any survivor who steps on it. He will also get a speed boost of 3 seconds if they step on it. He can only create 3 "Devil's Footprint" at a time and will destroy the last one if cast again.

Cooldown : 10 seconds
Damage : 9
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 50 seconds
Length : 5 meters

"Desperate Hunt" : Felix stand still for a moment, clawing the area around his eyes as his pupils burn with flames. While activated, he can see the auras of any survivor as long as they are not "Undetectable" and be given a speed boost for its duration of 8 seconds. His passive "Unassailable" will also activate.

Cooldown : 35 seconds
Damage : N/A
Windup : 2 seconds
Linger : 8 seconds
Length : N/A

Subaru looked at the cards with a haunted expression, not knowing what secret they held, their text unknown to him as he couldn't remember anything. He didn't know any of these people, but if they were in trouble, it was only normal he tried to help them, right?

So he had to do something, but these cages wouldn't budge. So he couldn't do anything.

- Don't tell me you think you can break out, mere mortal~? HEHEHEHAHAHAH! No one's here to save you, you stupid brat. Just like how they abandoned you!

- Abandoned? What the hell do you mean by that?!

The entity in front of him laughed, finding amusement in his resentment towards it.

- You'll find out soon~.

It looked back towards what it was watching, something like cracks in space which showed multiple people in different places. He didn't know why he was being kept here, just that this thing was planning something evil.

Finding no fruit in his efforts of breaking out from the bars of shadow, the feeling of fatigue finally got to him and he fell sitting.

- Aww~ is our poor Subaru tired? No friends to help you? HAHAHAHAHAH!

The entity ridiculed, its darkness growing stronger as the boy's anger grew. Then, it leaned towards him, its smile gone.

- No one's coming. So be quiet, brat.

Subaru gritted his teeth, his frustration growing more and more. Their eyes locked, the entity's blank and his in fury. It walked away from his cell of darkness, the entity creating a portal of darkness as it transformed into how he looks. Raven hair, sharp and hazelnut eyes, black and orange tracksuit.

The fake Subaru batted an eye towards the true one, giving him a mocking smile. It entered the portal, teleporting back to Lugunica as his fake.

He looked down, a feeling of hopelessness washing over him. He couldn't escape. He couldn't do anything...and somehow it reminded him of something he didn't want to remember.

He clutched his head as it ached terribly, bile rising up his throat. He stopped himself from throwing up due to the nausea. Something in his mind was trying to piece itself back, his memories.

Maybe he had lost them due to the amount of damage his soul took, and now that he was back, he was slowly recovering them.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Befriending the people of the Miload manor proved to be quite easy. This is mostly due to the recent events surrounding the boy, their guilt and regret made it doable for the entity to get through unnoticed. It was like he had blended in his natural environment, a household of negative emotions.

None of them ever considered he wasn't Subaru, just that they were glad he was alive. Even that clown. Even that spirit. None of them knew. It smiled.

It had already been a few days since he arrived there, and he was familiar with the residents that lived in the manor. But it still wasn't enough, he needed it to hurt them. He really wanted it to hurt them as much as it could when "Subaru" betrays them and traps them in a world of darkness. He needed that, thirsted for it.

He will elevate that pain and hurt when they found out their old friends had went insane and destroyed the very kingdom they were supposed to protect.

And not one of them will even know it wasn't the boy that they've loved, that they've forsook. Just the painful betrayal of a boy they wanted to form a bond with once again. Then, he will gain power from their suffering.

It was already evening, and he wanted her to join them for dinner. He walked towards a certain room that housed a blonde girl that couldn't bring herself to leave it. He had barely met and interacted with Beatrice so it was the perfect chance.

The knob turned, the door creaking open. Subaru smiled and waved at the two who had looked towards him.

- Hey, there. How are you feeling?

He noticed that the room was a bit messy, some random toy plushies scattered across the floor and a bed that looked like it hadn't been tidied for days.

- S...Subaru...?

A voice almost inaudible called out, belonging to a certain spirit. The raven-haired boy walked towards her, who was sitting on the chair in a fetal position. Her eyes locked with Subaru's, blood-shot and tear marks around them.

- Beatrice! Are you alright? You're crying...is anything wrong?

The boy wiped her tears, worry flashing in his expression.

- Betty...Betty doesn't know....She doesn't know what to do. Betty doesn't deserve to meet Subaru...

She choked out her words, sobbing lightly and sniffling. Subaru smiled at her with an assured expression.

- I know. But that's something I don't remember anymore. So, you don't have to feel bad, alright?

- But...what Betty did was still real...She can't ever forgive hersel-

More tears fell as the spirit continued to cry, but in that instant, the boy had pulled her into an embrace.

- I know, I know...It must've hurt, right? You must've been very lonely...

Beatrice's eyes widened in shock, her arms unable to respond with a hug back, her guilt disabling her to.

- ..W-what...?

- You said that you can't forgive yourself, but for me, you have done no sin at all. I don't remember any of that, and I don't want those feelings of yours to separate us.

The girl looked up at him, who had still continued to hugged her, wrapping the spirit in his warmth. He felt the coldness her skin had.

- If you still can't accept it, then promise me something. Please...always stay together with me. Beatrice...please be my friend.

Subaru pleaded, his eyes showing only genuineness and honesty. She felt how honest and true his words were, the coldness that made her body shiver slowly warming up.

She felt her heart strings tug, as more and more tears fell. Even after she had betrayed him, abandoned him, he would still return to her. To be together, like they promised.

- ...SORRY! BETTY IS SO SORRY! BETTY WON'T EVER LEAVE HER SUBARU ALONE AGAIN! NEVER AGAIN! B-BETTY PROMISES...!

She was so sorry...and so thankful that he wouldn't leave her, that he would still stay with her. Her hands wrapped around him, her soft hands clutching into his tracksuit.

- There, there.

Subaru patted her head, comforting the poor, sobbing spirit. Then, he gently scooped her up into the air, holding Beatrice in his hands.

- From now on, we'll be together always, okay?

The raven-haired boy smiled, the blonde spirit's lips slowly curling up. Then, she smiled, for the first time in a while.

- Always!

Some moments later, the boy and the girl had walked out of the room holding hands with a small smile present on the spirit's face. Tear marks still stained around her cheeks and eyes.

The two walked along the grand hallways of the manor, some servants glancing and greeting them with a smile. Subaru smiled back, waving at each and every one of them as he held Beatrice's hand.

She was still sniffling, trying to dry away her tear marks with a handkerchief.

As they approached the door to the dining room, the spirit's heart wavered. What would they think of this? Would they approve of her regained friendship with Subaru?

Even if she did, she will fight for it, because it was the boy himself that had pleaded her for this.

She was so happy, yet so scared at the same time. Since they still held the feelings of guilt and regret in their hearts, the rest of the people here might not approve as they pretty much thought of each other as undeserving of his friendship, even to their very own selves.

Subaru then opened the door, the light from the room blinding the two for a moment.

- Oh, Subaru! You're here! Dinner's ready, you know?

A voice from the silver-haired half-elf called out, greeting the raven-haired boy.

- Beatrice! It seems you've joooined~ us for tonight's dinner. It's a joooyful thing that you've finally come out of that room~.

A voice from a dark blue-haired man played for the blonde spirit, its usual playfulness ringing.

Ram, Frederica, Petra and the other servants placed each plate of food on the table with grace. Smiling as they did so. Garfiel sat on the table silently, just eyeing the his table and not on anyone.

- See? Everyone's here for you. for us. So, you don't have to be scared, Beatrice. It wasn't even your fault to begin with...

Subaru looked down at the spirit as he smiled, their hands together. His warmth burnt away all of the coldness she felt ever since that fate befell him.

- So let's start over from scratch...No, from zero!

The boy proclaimed, once again bringing a few lone tears from the spirit.

- Th-thank you...Subaru. Betty promises, Betty vows...that she will never leave you.

Beatrice smiled, the boy patting her head gently. The two then walked to the dining table, sitting just beside each other. All of them dug into their food, conversing with each other as they did so, trying to mend their broken relationship with the boy.

She's been given a second chance, she won't fail this time. She'd waited for this for 400 years, so she won't be making another mistake. She'll keep Subaru safe no matter the cost, be it her life and everything.

Their time together had already passed, each of them returned to their rooms for the night. Subaru stood on a balcony in the manor under the moonlight, the wind brushing against his hair and skin gently.

A strange glow of crimson red shone dimly in his eyes, his expression lost and distracted.

Faint footsteps echoed behind him, their shine gone. His lips curled up slowly, as if practiced.

- Subaru?

- Emilia-san. What brings you here so late at night?

Subaru turned around, leaning against the railing of the balcony. The stars shining just above them.

- N-nothing. I just thought...I wanted to gaze at the stars for a bit. Does it seem silly...to you?

She panicked, inducing a snicker from the boy. He smiled brightly at the girl.

- Hahahah. No way! The stars look pretty beautiful, so I understand too, Emilia-san.

The silver-haired girl exhaled, smiling back at the raven-haired boy.

- Yeah. You always liked saying that, Subaru...I guess some things never change, huh?

She sighed, looking down in regret and shame with a downtrodden expression.

- Please, don't be so down, Emilia-san. I told you that you don't have to worry so much about it.

- B-but...aren't you angry? At us?

Emilia argued, still in disbelief at how the boy had come to quickly accept his situation. When they told him of his past, he was shocked. But, he had slowly accepted it and moved on, in such a short amount of time.

Yet she couldn't, her mind couldn't rest easy. Her thoughts wouldn't cease. Her memories of his time in that cell, his beaten body, his hollow expression. She couldn't forget, ever.

She tried to mend their relationship, but it wasn't easy. Her guilt always dictated what she would feel every time she interacted with the boy. Even after all the events that had happened, doubt still lingered in her mind.

- I am. But, that doesn't mean it was all of your fault. That's why I'm giving all of you a chance, one last opportunity to fix our friendship. I won't let some stranger sever that unjustly.

He stated clearly, feelings true. The boy looked at the girl determinedly, that fire in his eyes that she'd grown accustomed to. The flames that assured her everything would be alright.

- A-alright. Thank you. Thank you so much, really. You're too kind, Subaru, always had been.

Emilia felt a tug in her heart, a lone tear escaping her eye. The girl wiped it with her finger. She was so glad, that Subaru had given them consideration, even if they didn't deserve it.

That's why she will earn his trust, his recognition, his love once again no matter what. To redeem herself for what she had done, for what they've done.

- Don't worry about it! I'm accepting cheek kisses. Heheheh.

The boy teased, pointing at his left cheek with puppy eyes. Emilia snickered, laughing lightly at the boy.

- You're still quite the dunderhead, huh, Subaru?

- Why the sudden insult?!

He whined, which caused even more giggles from the girl. It felt like they were finally returning back to normal, like how they used to. That's why she couldn't resist her tears from overflowing immediately. Emilia tried to wipe each of them, yet they continued to fall.

She sobbed, not out of sadness, but of relief. That even if slowly, everything was gradually being fixed.

- Don't worry, Emilia-san. Everything will be back to normal soon, I promise.

He reassured, smiling brightly at the half-elf girl.

- Thank you...thank you...!

She thanked, for his endless kindness that he had given all of them.

The two continued to talk for a short while, then returned to their room to rest for the night. Day still long before breaking, the sky dark as the moon illuminated while the stars twinkled.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Subaru walked along the hallway humming, trudging his way towards the kitchen for some snacks. His belly demanded that it get some boiled tato. Well, it was pretty tasty so he liked it. Beatrice silently followed beside him, their hands locked together.

It was almost afternoon, the light from the sun shining through the windows. Servants went about their duties whether it be cleaning rooms, furniture or maintenance of the tools and the large yard outside.

The door to the kitchen was already open, the warm aroma of his beloved tatoes inviting him in. The boy immediately walked in, looking at the pink-haired figure holding a pot full of steamed tatoes.

- Hey there, Ram-san! Got some for me?

- Subaru's such a glutton, I suppose...

The spirit beside him smiled slightly, reminding herself how much the boy loved to dip that tato with that weird condiment he made.

The boy grinned, eyeing the steamed vegetable. A trail of drool leaving his lips.

- Oh, sir. Here you go.

She picked up one from the pot and handed it to the boy, who accepted it with no second thoughts.

- That's quite a lot, I suppose. Are they for someone recovering?

Beatrice asked, noticing how the pot had looked heavy.

- Correct, lady Beatrice. They're for my sister who is currently recovering her strength after a coma.

Ram answered, voice monotone and professional.

- Hoh...Rem, was it? How is she feeling?

Subaru asked, wondering if there was anything new with the girl, after all they've only met once in his first day in the mansion. Now, it was almost a week since he had stayed here.

It seems it was time he visited the blue-haired girl too, just see how she is doing.

But if Ram had to describe her, it was terrible. She really wanted to meet Subaru again, but the older sister is worried if the boy might hate the idea. She doesn't know how to ask him, wondering if it was even alright in the first place.

- ...She's doing fine, sir. Although recovery is a bit slow, it's gradually getting better.

- Hmm...Hey, if it's possible, could I go see her with you?

The raven-haired boy requested, which surprised the pink-haired maid. It was quite literally the perfect timing, just like him. But...is it okay to just accept his help like this?

- Um...are you certain? Ram and her sister doesn't want to be a bother to our dear guest.

- Well, you two are not a bother at all. I just want to talk with her, you know? Maybe, make a new friend.

Subaru tried to convince, reassuring her that he did not mind doing so. Ram looked down for a moment, thinking about it.

If possible, she really wanted him to meet her sister so that Rem can at least feel positive and eat something. The girl refused almost all of the dishes she was given and only ate when she was severely hungry. It was incredibly unhealthy, and Ram can't bear to watch it. She wouldn't even let Ram inside, except for Petra and Frederica.

This was probably because she was very angry at them for condemning Subaru to that fate, and only viewed the two other maids as innocent since they played no part in his suffering.

Well, she deserved it for being so stupid, anyways. Why had she been so rash and quick to judge? Was it because she had already made up her mind that he was an archbishop by Beatrice's words? Most probably.

There's no time for her to be hating herself, she needs to decide now.

- I apologize, sir. But we don't really want to be an inconvenience to you.

- Inconvenience? Don't kid me, just tell me what you want.

Subaru argued, Ram looked away from him with a troubled expression.

- You there, maid girl. Subaru himself has said that he doesn't mind visiting your sister, so there's no need for you to be so uptight.

Beatrice added for the boy, finally convincing the pink-haired maid to let him meet her sister once again.

- I-I understand, lady Beatrice. Please, sir. Let me lead the way.

The maid offered, the boy nodding as he followed along.

The trio exited the kitchen, closing the door as they left. They walked along the mansion's hallway, Subaru trying to converse with the maid anyhow he could. Trying to get to know her was difficult, as she was way too uptight, too serious about her work.

After a while, they had finally arrived at the room Rem was currently staying in, having to move out of Subaru's room as he was back in the camp. Ram pleaded the boy to give the tatoes to the girl as she couldn't bring herself inside the room.

- Hey, Rem. It's been a while. Here's some steamed tatoes for you~.

The girl's expression quickly changed as she noticed the raven-haired boy enter the room.

- Subaru-kun! Thank you. How are you doing?

Rem greeted, a smile playing on her lips.

- Never been better! But more importantly, how about you?

The boy greeted back as he walked towards her. Subaru sat down the chair near the night stand and looked at her, placing the pot full of steamed tatoes on the nightstand.

Beatrice merely sat on his lap while eating a steamed tato.

- Rem's...fine, her strength is almost back now.

The girl answered with a downtrodden expression, not knowing how to feel about the people who had let that terrible thing to happen. This includes even to herself, who had done nothing but sleep while he braved through obstacle after obstacle.

How alone he must have felt, she wondered.

- I see. If anything's wrong, then just tell me, alright? I'll try to help any way I can!

The boy assured, offering her a helping hand if she ever needed it. Rem couldn't help but smile at his kindness. Some things never change, she thought. Even if he had no memories of their time together, the old Subaru still lives within him.

- Thank you, Subaru-kun. Rem is glad to talk to you like this.

She was being honest, truly. The first time they met after a while, Subaru didn't even know her name and it ached her heart terribly. So, now that things were slowly getting back on track, she was relieved.

- Mhm. Don't hesitate to tell me if there's anything you want to say, alright? I'll be here always for you.

- Well...if you don't mind, Subaru-kun. There's something I want your help with...

Her expression tensed as she looked down with a regretful face.

- Tell me, Rem.

- It's about Rem's sister...Rem been acting to rude to her until now, because of well...what happened to you. And...Rem hates to ask this...but Rem was wondering if you could...maybe give her this?

The blue-haired girl requested, slightly choking out some of the words as her anxiety grew. She'd treated Ram horribly out of frustration and anger, so she wanted to make it up to her somehow.

She handed a pink hair pin that suited her older sister's hair perfectly to Subaru, its smooth texture feeling like it was just newly made.

- Did you make this yourself? It's beautiful.

- Thank you...Subaru-kun. Yes, Rem made it herself as a token of apology for her sister.

Subaru smiled at her, clutching the pin in his hand.

- As much as I would love to honor your request, I think it's best you give it to her yourself, Rem.

The raven-haired boy tried to convince, as avoiding her sister entirely wasn't beneficial for their relationship at all. Communication is key, so the two sisters had to talk about their problems with each other by themselves.

He held her hand, opening it and dropping the pink pin on her palm. Rem looked at him with a surprised face, but quickly accepted it.

- You're right, Subaru-kun. Avoiding her won't do us any good, so I have to meet her myself and talk about it.

His lips curled upwards at her choice, his smile brightening.

- There you go! How about a hug, eh?

The boy opened his arms widely, gesturing for a hug with the blue-haired girl. She merely smiled back, her cheeks reddening a bit.

She immediately leaned towards him, wrapping her arms around his chest and resting her head on his shoulder. A warm feeling enveloped her heart.

- Oh, we have quite the strong hugger!

Subaru hugged back, wrapping his arms around her too.

The two continued to talk for a while after. Subaru had left the room with Beatrice to go on about their day. That evening, Ram was told by Subaru to visit Rem and the two sisters had a proper conversation after days.

Rem revealed her frustration not only towards them, but also to herself for damning Subaru to that fate as she did nothing. Ram felt guilty for not realizing that the boy had been innocent, but she had no memories of him at the time due to Gluttony.

So, Rem understood that it was something that spiraled out of control. Something out of their reach. But that didn't mean they were forgiven yet, they still have to redeem themselves.

They promised to protect everyone that was important to them, and never let such a thing to happen ever again.

That was when that they had finally found peace between each other, their previous situation finally solved. All they had to do was talk, to lay everything they wanted to on the table so there were no misunderstandings.

Rem and Ram hugged each other as they finally made up, relief washing over them.

In a room away from them, Subaru laid down on his bed while Beatrice laid just beside him. The spirit truly did not want to separate from him.

His eyes that were closed snapped open, glowing a crimson red as his lips formed a smile.

Chapter Text

Felix walked through the hallways of the Karsten estate with a frigid face, fingers trembling.

- Hey...Isn't that Felix-sama? He doesn't look well.

Asked a servant who served the household concernedly.

- Didn't you know? It seems that the archbishop he was in charge of keeping captive looked like...Natsuki Subaru.

A young butler with bright green hair responded immediately, having heard of it from a friend who served as a knight.

This was only possible because of Felix constantly bringing a squad of knights to help "interrogate" the supposed archbishop.

- THE Natsuki Subaru?! If that's really true...then I fear for our lady's standing in the Selection.

- Yeah, if word gets out, then her current standing will worsen.

The two servants took notice of the healer approaching and tightened their expressions, bowing as he passed by.

They noticed that the feline had messy hair, bloodshot eyes and his cat-like ears drooping.

As soon as he was far away, the two relaxed, looking at the healer warily.

- Hopefully, it's not true.

- Yeah. HOPEFULLY.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Felix didn't feel very well, in fact, he was sickened. Not because of a sickness, or someone. If anyone, then it was himself he was disgusted with.

He had broken the healer's code, using his magic to hurt instead of to heal. Not only to an innocent, but to a hero beloved by the people, a boy he could call a friend.

Even if he was far away, he could still somewhat hear their murmuring. Maybe they had found out the truth. But he couldn't afford to answer them for now.

He had to take care of his lady who was on the verge of death, her condition worsening by the day. Every time he used his healing magic, a faint doubt in himself glimmered.

Something in the healer told him that he didn't deserve to use healing magic, yet he had to, for his lady's sake.

The feline could see it, that all-too familiar door. The scent of upcoming death lingering in it. He held the lump in his throat, his pupils dilating.

As soon as he got in front of it, Felix hesitated. Could he still face her? Even after all his failures?

No, no, he can't think like this right now. He has to heal her. Comfort her pain. It was the least, and at the same time, the most he could do.

His only choice, his only option.

- C-Crusch-sama. It's me, Felix...May I come in?

Felix asked with a trembling voice, the hesitation clear.

- F...Felix. You...may...

He held the knob of the door in his hand, his heart beating rapidly. A panic attack was threatening to come for him.

Was this okay? Does he deserve this? He's done so many terrible things, so why was he still here?

Remembering Subaru in that cell, that hollow expression, his constant screaming, he did not want to remember.

A sweat dropped from his forehead as they formed, the knob turned slowly.

The door creaked open, a small ray of light seeped through the window to enter the room.

It was well-kept and clean, yet looking at his lady...Crusch...the healer clenched his fists. There was nothing he could do, nothing but ease her pain and that was it.

Her body was riddled with bandages, her skin turning a dead brown, veins bulging.

The best healer...what a load of shit. Maybe his last hope was the boy he had gotten killed, the boy he tortured. Yet, he was already dead.

He berated himself mentally, for being the monster he is. For letting all of this happen. For letting his desperation get the best of him.

Now, he is left to pick up the pieces left.

- I'm here to heal you, Crusch-sama...

He walked over to the side of her bed, sitting on the chair. The duchess looked at him and nodded, lying on the bed in pain.

- P-proceed.

Felix's hands reached over to Crusch, shining a dim blue light.

He could still see it, that disappointment in her eyes. He really wanted to ignore it, to force it down into his mind. But he couldn't. He can't. He has to bear it.

Else, he would truly become a monster.

- H...How are your memories, Crusch-sama?

The healer asked with worry, after all, the duchess memories finally returned to her. Along with a certain boy's name.

- Remember...I can re-remember...all...

The duchess answered with a weak voice, the feline's hands trembled.

- Ah...I see. Felix is glad...

But that would mean things are not gonna be good for him. If not for the sake of her health, then he might've gotten a very severe punishment. Maybe even death.

He was the only healer capable of easing her pain after all. The rest can't even budge the dragon blood's effects.

- Wilhelm...where is...he?

The healer's eyes widened as he mentioned the old butler. How could he answer?

Wilhelm had been gone for days now, was he still upset of Felix? Is it because of him? He didn't know...but judging how the man viewed Subaru, then he most likely was.

He resisted biting his lips there, not wanting to anger his lady.

- Wilhelm...he's...I'm sorry, Crusch-sama. I don't know...

Felix answered with hesitation, regret glimmering in his expression.

- I..see. Have...people...go search for him.

Crusch ordered, still a bit weak. The healing had taken some effect now.

- B-but, Crusch-sama! The mansion...Someone has to protect you!

The feline argued, worried for his lady. If he took the knights with him, then who would defend the mansion if they're attacked? The servants can't fight as well as them, so no one would be able to keep Crusch safe.

- Don't worry...Leave some to guard the...mansion.

Some? Was that enough? But he has to obey, she's already compromised, so he shouldn't say any thing more...but...

- P-please, Crusch-sama...I'm worried for you. Felix will look for him alone, so please...! Let the knights stay to guard you!

He can't, he doesn't want her to be alone, or to have only a few keeping watch for her. He can't feel safe if not. What if someone knew the truth? What if they decide to attack Crusch because of that?

While no one can protect her? While she was defenseless?

Then he could never forgive himself.

- E-enough...This is an order...Obey.

In that moment, the healer's thoughts ceased. His hands dropped to his sides, the healing light dissapting as he looked down.

- Yes...Felix will do it.

He gave up, he did not want to anger her. He did not want to disappoint her any more than he had. Crusch knows, and hasn't punished him yet. He has to obey. Obey. Obey.

The feline stood up from his seat with an unreadable expression, and started to walk out of the room.

- W..wait...

Crusch called out, which stopped the healer in his tracks. Felix looked at his lady with a somber expression.

- Crusch-sama? Did you need anything else...?

He asked with a low voice.

- The Emilia camp...how are they...doing?

Fear flashed in his expression as soon as she questioned him, he did not want to know. He was scared, too afraid to face them.

He tried to gather the courage to reach out to them, even tried to send a letter. But he could never finish the final sentence, something always stopped him. His fear, his regret, his failure.

Then, he would crumple the paper and throw it away.

He couldn't do it.

- Sorry...I'm sorry, Crusch-sama. I-I don't know...

Felix answered with a lump in his throat, his eyes snapping away from her.

- Send...out a letter...greet them...See how they are doing...

The duchess requested the feline, hesitation and doubt clear in his face.

- B-but, Crusch-sama...Is it alri-

- Do it...Felix. It's the least...we could do...

Crusch interrupted the healer, knowing how he would react. It was only expected, he was scared of reaching out to them.

He was scared not for himself, but for her. Because they might know. Because they might take revenge.

- ...Then, Felix will...try. I'll go now, Crusch-sama...Please take care.

The duchess' eyes slowly closed from exhaustion as the healer got out of the room. The door slammed close and Felix ran along the hallway as his heart beat rapidly.

A faint shadow loomed beside her bed, growing with each second.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A lone knight who leads a squad stood in front of Felix's office, having been called out specifically.

- Felix-sama? Have you called for me?

The young man asked from behind the door, confused by the sudden summon.

- Ah, yes! Come in, please.

The healer's voice rang from inside the room, permitting the knight to enter.

The door knob turned and it creaked open, the office was a bit messy. Some crumpled papers on the floor and on the table, compiled sheets left in an unorderly manner on the feline's desk.

- Did you need anything, Felix-sama?

- Crusch-sama gave orders to look for Wilhelm van Astrea, so could you send out a team to search for him?

Felix stated politely, not in an authoritative tone. Yes, he was higher in standing than the knight, but it's honestly better to have good relations with who he's working with.

- But, who would be in charge of guarding the household?

The knight questioned in concern, if his squad of knights left to look for the old butler, then who will protect the Karsten estate?

Since the rest of the knights stationed in Crusch's camp were not really great in numbers, mostly due to the rumors spreading around. They didn't want to risk working with someone who supposedly killed a hero.

So, they voluntarily quit and requested to be stationed back in the Royal Castle.

The ones who stayed were people who had known the duchess or either helped by her, not wanting to "betray" Crusch in a time of need.

- Maybe, we could take a part of them to each guard and look for him?

The healer compromised fairly, as his lady told him to.

As much as he didn't want to lessen the estate's security, in this dire time, he has to obey her orders.

Someone might know the truth, and that someone might want revenge for Subaru. It was too scary.

But, orders are orders. If he can't take them, then he might as well quit.

- Understood. Then, I shall get going posthaste.

- Please.

The knight exited the room in a haste, jogging across the hallways into the knights' barracks to inform his team.

Felix sighed as the young man got out of the room, the stress and exhaustion finally coming back to haunt him. He leaned towards the table, resting his head on it.

Under him was a paper with letters written on it, still incomplete.

He looked at the multiple crumpled ones littered across the room, showing how much he's been trying to create a letter that wouldn't...aggravate the Emilia camp.

- What should I do...?

The feline truly did not know what next course of action to take, except for the order he has to obey.

Yet, that doubt and hesitation halted him.

Because he was scared, of course. How would they view him? Would they attack them the next day to avenge Subaru?

No, no, he has to write the letter. He has to complete it. He has no other choice.

Obey. Obey. Obey.

So the healer, despite his fear and hesitation, opted to complete his letter so he may send it out.

It contained their greetings for the Emilia camp, wishing for their wellbeing, condolences for their loss, and so on.

They knew, that he had taken part in the boy's suffering and death. So, a negative reaction should be expected.

As soon as he finished his letter, Felix got out of his office and had stridden across the hallway. He stopped in the Karsten estate's lobby, looking for the head maid.

That's probably the only person he can trust to not spread any gossip about the letter to the Emilia camp.

Not finding her there, he walked out of the household, looking for any sign of her in the garden.

- Felix-sama? What brings you here?

The head maid was in charge of taking care of the plants today...he almost forgot.

- Could you please have this letter be sent out to the Emilia camp?

The healer requested with a serious expression and voice as he handed the letter, to which the woman nodded to.

- Understood.

The head maid bowed and received the paper. Judging by her expression, she already knew what to do.

Don't tell anyone about it, keep it a secret.

- Then, I will get going right away. Take care, Felix-sama.

She bowed once again before taking off to do his request.

Felix stood alone in the garden, the gray cloudy skies up above barely giving out any sunlight. It seemed to perfectly mirror the way he felt right now. Foggy, lost, and scared.

This was the best course of action, he had to do it. Whatever way they react, he has to face it. He has to be strong.

Not just for himself, but for his lady too.

He tried to ignore them, not wanting to know how they view him now. A monster, perhaps?

More than that, he feared that their hate might be enough to get everyone he loved killed. His lady, Wilhelm, his friends...

Right now, their relationships were in the verge of breaking, and he had tried all he can to keep them tied. But he's struggling, so much so.

It was like he was in the middle of a void, sinking under the deepest layer of a lake.

Breathing felt heavy, his eyes even heavier. There was this pressure on his shoulders, on his back. Something pulling him towards something, somewhere.

Then, in that moment, a loud explosion occurred from the estate.

His heart dropped, his head quickly snapping towards it.

Smoke formed and started to fly to the sky, a huge pillar of flame covering a large part of it.

Don't tell me...is it them-

- CRUSCH-SAMA!

His legs had moved before he even realized, guiding him to the entrance of the household. The doors had been busted, allowing an entrance for the healer.

Without hesitation, Felix entered the burning building. He coughed as he inhaled the smoke, flames covered pretty much everything. The paintings burning away, the furniture breaking, the walls slowly breaking down.

He navigated across the fallen debris and avoided the flames, looking for Crusch's room. He ran, faster than he had in his life.

Felix didn't want to fail her any more than he already had. He didn't want to disappoint the duchess more than how she already was.

But most of all, he didn't want to lost Crusch forever.

He wouldn't be able to forgive himself then, he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

In the burning hallway, he noticed a young man with blonde hair and cross-shaped scars on his face. He had emerald green eyes, and sharp teeth.

The boy had an unreadable expression, stopping the healer in his tracks.

- You...you damned devil. It was your fault captain...captain died...!

Garfiel Tinsel? The Shield of the Emilia camp...someone he was familiar with. Did he do this for revenge?

- WAS IT YOU?! DID YOU BURN CRUSCH-SAMA'S ESTATE?!

In a state of anger and disbelief, the feline screamed at the blonde demi-human.

Even if he understood, even if he accepted, that he was a monster deserving of this...his lady had taken no part in it. She was innocent, so why?

- WHO CARES?! THIS IS REVENGE! I AIN'T LETTIN' YA SAVE HER!

Garfiel shouted back with fury flashing in his eyes, a faint red glow shining under them.

- Tch...OUT OF MY WAY!

Felix sprinted towards the demi-human quickly, tackling him to the ground.

They both grunted as they hit the floor, then the healer attempted to get up and get to Crusch's room.

The blonde boy grabbed his left foot, making Felix fall back. He noticed the flames growing closer and closer to them.

He has to save Crusch quick, or they'll get to her first.

- LET GO! LET GO! LET GO!

He tried to kick Garfiel time and time again, trying to get his hand off.

But the boy was unwavering, he kept holding on as his face was repeatedly kicked. As the healer slowed down from exhaustion, the blonde slowly got up as he held the feline's foot.

Finding an opening, Felix tried to escape, but the boy was quick to hold his wrists. Garfiel pinned him on the floor, stuck helpless.

Felix tried to break free, his arms flailing around. All in vain.

- DIE, SCUM!

Garfiel opened his mouth, attempting to bite the flesh of his neck off.

In that instant, Felix kicked his stomach. It caught the blonde off-guard and gave a chance for the healer to push him away.

The feline instantly got up and made a run to Crusch's room.

Garfiel landed on the floor as he grunted, gritting his teeth. Not wanting the healer to escape, he stood up and chased after the healer.

Felix jumped above fallen debris and broken furnitures, avoiding obstacles that hindered him. Meanwhile, the blonde didn't even care.

There was this animalistic rage in his eyes, a red glow emanating from his body.

He continued running, careless for what stood in his way, he stumbled often, but it didn't stop him from gaining balance quickly and continue on.

The flames continued to grow stronger and stronger, more and more debris falling to the ground.

Garfiel grew closer and closer, a testament to his superior strength above the healer.

Then, in an unexpected way, he pounced forward. They fell down on the floor once again, the healer pinned down on his back.

- DIE! DIE! DIE! JUST DIE!

He punched Felix's face repeatedly, causing the feline to spit out blood.

- ARGH!

The healer grunted as Garfiel tried to bite him again, the healer tried to hold his head away. He struggled to keep the blonde from killing him. So...

Then, finding his opportunity, the feline's hands shone.

- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

The blonde demi-human cried out in pain as his blood boiled from the inside. His body gave out, his consciousness fading.

The boy landed on the ground unconscious, Felix's eyes widened in shock.

He'd done it. Again.

His pupils were dilated, his hands shaking rapidly.

No, he can't afford to sit around like this. He has to save Crusch quickly...

Felix got up from the floor, leaving Garfiel as the flames grew closer to consume his body. Yet, as they did, his body slowly turned black and disappeared like smoke.

He kept coughing as he navigated across the burning hallway, finally finding her room.

The walls of the room were partially destroyed, its door completely broken and burning.

As he quickly sprinted into the room, a faint fear grew inside him. Something telling him that the worst had happened...All he could feel was desperation.

His eyes widened as he saw a figure of a person on the floor, no signs of movement.

- CRUSCH-SAMAA!!!

Tears fell as he dashed towards her body, his hands trembling.

No, no, no, no. This can't be. This can't be happening...

Why? Why? Why? She was innocent, so why?

She didn't deserve this...She saved him...she was a good person...it was his fault...so why?

- AHHHHHH!!!

Felix screamed out in pain as he sobbed, holding her in his arms.

His tears fell on her, melting away on her skin.

Why...? Of all people, even him, why her?

Garfiel said he did it for revenge, he himself, not by order. But of his own volition.

So it was Felix's fault.

It was his...Oh...He understands now. It was all his fault, right from the start.

He realized in a moment that felt like stopped time, the flames growing closer and closer.

The healer continued to cry, holding the dead duchess in his arms. She was gone, and he felt so alone. He felt sorrow, stronger than any other.

As the pillar of flames finally came close to consuming them, Felix closed his eyes. He accepted, that he deserved this. This misery.

A monster like him did.

He failed not only Wilhelm, but himself too. And most of all, he failed his lady, Crusch. So he should only die alongside her.

Because in the end, nothing really mattered. All that he's done, whether good or bad, was nothing in front of death.

All that he'd done for her, was for nothing. Everything was in vain.

That realization broke him in many ways, so he did nothing but to accept it.

Debris fell around them, the fires growing stronger and stronger.

Then, a faint shadow formed behind him.

The next thing he only knew, was darkness...and only darkness. He could feel nothing, see nothing, hear nothing.

Before they could be burned alive, before the fire could melt them away, darkness covered the two.

It caught the healer, separating the duchess from him.

The entity smiled as it caged Felix in its darkness.

- Not so quick now, my dear kitten~.

Chapter Text

Subaru has been watching, observing the entity as it watched strangers with its strange space rift-like cracks.

He noticed that it specially was wary of the one with flaming red hair and blue eyes, a young man wearing gallant and knightly clothing. It seemed he was equipped with a blade akin to a legendary sword.

Alike those in fairy tales.

The raven-haired boy also noticed the purple-haired knight and merchant that it seemed to be interested in.

For some reason, the said knight didn't look too well. Like something terrible had happened to him recently, not something physical... but mental.

Like he was traumatized. But why?

Subaru didn't know, but the most he knew that the monster was targeting specifically people with some form of authority or power in that place.

Then, it gazed back at him as it noticed the boy staring. How did it even know?

- I can feel your malice, BOY. None of these trash are gonna save your sad, pitiful self, so quit staring.

It growled as it gazed back towards its potential targets.

He looked down at his hands, somewhat bruised from all the slamming he did against those indestructible bars of shadow.

Frustration boiled from deep within, the humiliation of being imprisoned...only to watch seemingly innocent people get caught in its traps.

He didn't know them, truly. His memories felt very hazy, like a huge gap had replaced all of them. The boy could only barely remember the time he left his house, and went somewhere...then blank after that.

How was his parents doing? Were they okay? They're probably looking for him right now...very worried for him. Their son.

As much as he did not want to concern them, there was nothing else he could do but watch. He feels terrible. They probably are thinking their own child had left them after they took care of him for so long.

In their eyes, would they look at him like trash now? Do they still...love him? Will they hate him now?

He hoped not, no matter how selfish it was. In the past, maybe he would be glad...that a burden like him was off their shoulders.

Yet, after being here for an unknown amount of time...He'd come to appreciate every little thing that he experienced, that he took for granted.

In that moment, something in his head felt like it broke. It started to ache very terribly.

Subaru clutched his head in pain, gritting his teeth.

- Wha...

A familiar voice echoed in his mind, like something was trying to fill it. It was somewhat inaudible, but the tone was...familiar.

"Wait....there...I'll...come...save....you...!", he heard. From who he heard it, sounded like he was in a lot of pain. Like he was DYING.

An unfamiliar memory played out as the sentence played. A hand reaching out for another, blood pooling under them. Moonlight seeping through the broken roof, a hint of orange and black. A hint of white and purple beside him.

Subaru barely resisted bile from coming out of his throat, covering his mouth as sweat dropped. The acidity forced tears out of his eyes, drool escaping his lips.

The entity knew, after all, in this void...its eyes are everywhere.

It smiled sadistically, noticing the boy's memories slowly recover.

- Yes, that's it...Suffer. Suffer.

Then, it frowned. It's expression unreadable.

- So, I may revive her.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Birds chirped their morning songs as leaves flew by, the curtains blew against the windows. Flowers and grass fluttered as wind brushed against them, the gentle sun bathing the world with its morning light.

- Heya, Emilia-san!

Subaru greeted as he entered the dining room, waving at the silver-haired girl. A blonde girl held his hand and followed behind.

- Oh, Subaru! Good morning!

Emilia greeted with a smile, waving back to the raven-haired boy with energy.

- What a great morning, isn't iiiit~, Subaru-kun~?

Roswaal cut in with his usual exaggerated grace, giving the boy a smirk.

- Captain...Mornin'.

Garfiel looked at him, a small smile on his face. Though, it looked pretty forced.

The demi-human seemed pretty sad and somber, something must've happened. Subaru walked over to the table, taking a seat as Beatrice sat beside him.

He looked at the blonde boy thoughtfully, before a smile played on his lips.

- Hey, Garfiel! How about we hang out this afternoon? I'm free, you know?

Subaru offered with friendliness, sticking out his index finger.

Garfiel looked at him with a mixed expression, like he wanted to, but yet he couldn't at the same time.

- What's wrong?

The raven-haired boy asked with worry along with Emilia. Ever since Otto left, he's been like this. Like he was a husk of his former self, his usual energetic self was nowhere to be seen.

- N...nah, nah. It's nothin', captain. I don't wanna bother ya.

Garfiel answered with hesitation, catching Subaru's attention.

- Oh, come on! Let's hang out, please? For maybe...20 minutes?

He pleaded with puppy eyes, to which got a surprised look from the demi-human.

As much as the demi-human wanted to accept, he didn't feel like he deserves to. Not only had he fought with Otto, leaving in a bad note...He had wronged his captain in the worst way possible.

There's no forgiving himself from that.

- Garfiel...there's no need for you to hesitate. It's Subaru himself who is asking, so what's the harm?

Emilia reassured the boy who was probably guilty and angry with himself.

For making his friend leave, for abandoning his captain and letting him die.

- ...well...I...

Yes, if his captain is the one asking why should he hesitate?

- Damn it...ALRIGHT! I want to! I want to hang out with ya!

He shouted in an outburst, cold sweat forming from his forehead. He practically jumped out of his chair, slamming his hands on the table as if he had released days worth of stress.

Subaru smiled with satisfaction.

- Heheh, that's a promise, alright?

The raven-haired boy indicated, clear enough that it would go through his thick skull.

Garfiel wiped some tears with his arm as he nodded.

- Y-yeah!

The demi-human sat back down his chair, his shoulders finally relaxing. His tension slowly dissapating.

Roswaal clapped his hands up in the air, the doors opening as maids entered with their meals for breakfast.

- Now~ without further ado, let us diiiine~!

Plates clanged against the tables as they were gently placed, the warm aroma of food spreading across the room.

The group conversed as they dined, chattering as they ate. Little by little, Garfiel started to join alongside the group.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footsteps thudded on the cobblestone path, the sound of the wind blowing. It had already been dusk when Garfiel arrived, it took him so long to gather the courage to face Subaru.

Orange, red, and yellow painted across the skies, the sun on the horizon dimly lighting the area.

He knew it wasn't good to keep him waiting, but the anxiety kept stopping him.

- You're here...as promised.

Subaru called out, sitting on the stairway leading down to the large yard. He looked back at the blonde demi-human behind him, which looked tense and nervous.

His captain didn't look mad at him for being EXTREMELY late. In fact, he had a very patient and understanding expression.

- Garfiel. Come, take a seat.

Gulping, the blonde walked over beside the raven-haired boy. Clearly anxious for whatever may happen next.

- Uh, what'd ya want to talk 'bout, captain?

Garfiel asked with clear hesitation.

- Take a seat.

The demi-human got down to sit on the stone stairway, beside Subaru.

- Listen, I'll be straight with you, alright?

He nodded at Subaru's straightforwardness. Maybe the scary-eyed boy just knew that the demi-human could better use a pep talk rather than mere comforting words.

- I don't remember any of you. All of you know that.

- ...yeah.

How lucky they were, and so ironic at the same time. Such a grave sin, an unforgivable act...forgiven and forgotten so easily. As if it was nothing.

This was why Garfiel didn't know how to interact with him, because he was lost. Confused. Everything was so sudden, like it was just passing wind. Everyone around him seemed to have accepted this so quickly.

And there he was, still stuck. Still regretful. The only one who couldn't accept it.

An outcast.

The past few days, every time he looked at them. Sometimes having fun, sometimes talking their hearts out...He felt so alone. So excluded.

Was it because he was still weak? Because everyone around him was much more mature?

- But you know, why are you so adamant on being alone?

- That's...

Yes, why?

Every time, they tried to invite him. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to. When he looked into his captain's eyes, it was as if everything that they experienced together...was just gone.

Spending time with him? Like any of them had the right, after what they had done? That didn't sit right with him.

- Hm?

- Well...I...uh...

He hated it. The fact that everything that happened seemed like it was just ignored, swatted away like a fly. As if they've never done anything wrong. How could they accept it so easily?

Was there something he was missing?

- You...feel guilty, don't you?

Subaru questioned, his eyes piercing into the blonde's soul. He was trying to read into Garfiel. Those sharp eyes that always told him that everything was gonna be fine, the fire behind them.

Even after all of this, they still remained.

- ...How in the hell wouldn't I...?

Garfiel muttered lowly, eyes on the ground.

- Yes. I heard from Beatrice about everything.

He swallowed a lump in his throat, cold sweat beginning to form.

What does his captain think? He must want him out of the camp, right? After all, he had failed to protect him. He was supposed to be the camp's Shield. But, in that time, he didn't even protect Subaru.

He viewed the raven-haired boy as a villain, a cunning mastermind who leaded the Witch Cult alongside the other Archbishops...wearing a seemingly innocent mask.

A mistake, so fatal that it might as well have broken their ties. Their friendship, their bond.

So, why? Why were they given a second chance as if they deserved it?

He remembered Otto's words. "WHY COULDN'T YOU AND RAM DO ANYTHING MORE?! DIDN'T YOU VISIT HIM?!". He was right, and Garfiel didn't want to accept it.

That he was the one who made that mistake.

Not only that, he had the gall to blame Otto, someone who couldn't even get the chance to see Subaru for himself.

So shameless. Maybe that was why he felt like he didn't deserve to be with them.

- I'm angry.

Well, that he could accept at least. What he could do for Subaru is accept his fury, and take whatever punishment he gives.

- But, that doesn't mean I should blame you.

Disbelief flashed in Garfiel's expression as he heard that. His eyes widened, clearly confused.

- H...huh?

He felt like his heart dropped in that moment.

- I mean it. I know that none of you remembered me by the time it happened.

- B-but...that ain't change the fact that we still caused it-

The blonde tried to argue, his mind unable to accept Subaru's words. Was this really happening? Was he that kind? No...

Subaru was always kind, the kindest he'd ever known.

His captain would always charged head on to danger, knowing damn well he was in too. And that made him the freaking coolest guy he knew.

- You caused it? No. Did you forget who you should blame?

- Blame...?

He looked at the boy with a conflicted face.

- That damned archbishop of Gluttony. The one who took away my name!

Subaru growled out the title in anger.

Ah...that's right. He almost forgot. It's not that it was their fault from the start, it was the source of all that pain. The source of Subaru's suffering and end.

He had been blaming the wrong ones all along. The feeling of failing his friends really blurred that simple fact up.

It blinded him from the true source of it all. The source of all their regrets and sorrows. It wasn't their fault. It was the archbishop's.

Yet...something inside him told him...couldn't they have done better?

- I know, it's not that easy to accept it. To forgive yourself and live with it.

Garfiel nodded, what Subaru was saying is right. He can't just make his own self forgive his own actions just like that.

- But just like everyone else...I want you to prove yourself. That we can still fix this.

His eyes widened in that moment, a realization hitting him. Something so simple, yet didn't ever cross Garfiel's mind. Self-hating doesn't answer that, it only makes it worse.

To hate himself would be to run away from his true feelings. To face his captain head on would be the courage to face his problems head on.

He remembered that night Subaru fearlessly charged into the Great Rabbit's ground, no hint of fear or hesitation. Just that damned cool smile that makes any person admire him.

The courage and determination to face anything.

It was what he needed right now, what he needed the most.

Garfiel looked at Subaru with determined eyes, his heart unwavering.

- Yeah.

But how? What must he do to earn it?

- Heh, I knew you'd snap back to yourself quickly.

The raven-haired boy smirked, a small smile playing on the demi-human's lips.

- So let's start again, from scratch.

Subaru reached out a hand to Garfiel, as the blonde looked at him bewildered.

- The name's Natsuki Subaru. And you are...?

Oh, that's what he was doing. He wasn't fixing their relationship. He was restarting them.

There was no point in fixing something so broken, it couldn't even be fixed in the first place. So, just start on a blank slate. It doesn't matter if you have an ugly start, because a painter would say...

...to make it exist first, then just make it beautiful later.

What a guy. Garfiel's smile turned into a wide smirk, his hand clapping with the raven-haired boy's.

- Heh! I'm Garfiel Tinsel, better not forget it, captain!

- You got it.

The two shook hands, both of their hearts strong and determined.

He won't fail Subaru this time, he WILL protect him. He WILL protect them. Everyone he cares for is under his protection as long as he lives.

As if they had made a vow to start anew and protect it until the end, the two promised to each other in that moment.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Multiple footsteps thudded on the floor, a door creaking open. People murmured as they entered the lobby of the Miload manor. As always, it was as luxurious as it could be. Furniture that seemed to be made of quality material, red carpets, extravagant wallpapers, paintings from famous artists. You name it all.

It had everything an aristocrat should have.

- Uh, what's happening?

- Dunno. Subaru-sama called us.

Onex and Shed chatted as they entered along with the other servants.

- Subaru wanted to say something to us!

- Oh, isn't that great, dear Petra?

Petra cheered as Frederica followed her from behind, smiling at the young girl.

- Did Subaru-kun tell you anything, sis?

- Nothing of note, sissy.

Rem and Ram looked around the lobby, both wearing their maid outfits now. Rem had made a complete recovery and came back as a maid, which her sister, Ram, was really glad for.

- Is Subaru-kun planning something agaiiiin~?

- Subaru's not a naughty boy, he wouldn't!

- I'd be more afraid of you plannin' somethin', clown.

Roswaal, Emilia, and Garfiel entered the room last, seemingly more comfortable with each other now. That previous tenseness when Subaru was gone...it was slowly calming down.

- I do not knooow~ what you are talking about, dear Garfiel-kun~...

The court magician shrugged his shoulders, smiling innocently as if he knew nothing.

- You think the great Garfiel's an idiot?! Ya know what I'm talkin' about!

The demi-human pointed at him in outrage, clearly annoyed.

- Guys! Calm down, calm down.

The half-elf tried to de-escalate the situation.

As if on cue, the doors to the entrance slammed open. A familiar raven-haired figure cheered as he went in waving his hand, and holding his other, was none other than Beatrice.

- YO! How are you all?

He greeted with enthusiasm, which was met with surprised faces, then smiles.

- Doin' good!

- Well enough, Subaru-kun.

- Fine.

- I'm doing very much fineeee~.

- Perfect!

- Who cares?

Yeah, who cares-

- WAIT, WHO SAID THAT?!

Subaru shouted in an outrage, pointing to the crowd. All of them looked away at the same time, thinking who the hell said that too.

- Well, I'll find out later.

The raven-haired boy cleared his throat, catching their attention once again.

- So, I know all of you are surprised for the sudden call.

He clapped his hands together, winking at the group.

- Sorry about that.

- Hey, Barusu. What did you want to say?

- Hmmm~ Do you have an important announcement to make, perhaps~?

The master-servant duo asked the boy curiously.

- Well...I noticed that things have been getting stale lately.

Some of them raised an eyebrow in confusion. Stale? Was Subaru bored of his current schedule in the mansion? Well, he's always been a very energetic and outgoing so it was possible.

- Are you gonna create a new game, Subaru?

Petra wondered, he's always had such fun and interesting games and ideas. Especially that snow festival that they did...it was so fun. Shame they hadn't been able to repeat it since.

- Yes!! That's it, Petra-chan! 500 points to you!

Subaru pointed at the orange-haired girl with excitement.

Then, the residents looked at him bemused, but nonetheless, anticipating.

Unknowingly, a shadow had been growing slowly in the Miload Manor...stretching across the entire lobby they were in.

In that moment, Roswaal's expression changed...looking at the boy warily.

Little by little, his eyes started to glow red.

What was happening? He felt odd, he sensed an unfamiliar coldness spreading across the room.

Then before he knew it...everything had turned black.

- H-huh?!

- What the...

- Where are we?!

Each of them shouted in confusion as they had noticed that they were gone from the Miload Manor, and instead in some form of void.

- Let's play a game of tag. If you lose...

Subaru's body started to go static, then slowly turned into a dark being. It was completely made of darkness, its two horns, white eyes and its whole body outlined the only visible thing.

- Your dear Subaru...is dead. Heheh~

A crack formed in the darkness, showing the raven-haired boy in a cage of shadows, clutching his head in pain.

- SUBARU-KUN!

- You...WHAT DID YOU DO?!

- CAPTAIN!

The entity merely chuckled in sadistic glee, finding their reactions amusing.

- Those questions can be answered later. For now, just take a nap~.

An unknown pressure forced them down, their consciousness blurring instantly. It was as if gravity itself was forcing them down the ground.

None of them could resist its power, as it had grown stronger and stronger...feeding off what they felt.

Rem held her sister's hand as her eyes started to close, Frederica tightly held Petra in her arms. None of them knew what was happening, but one thing was in common.

All of them were in real trouble, specially Subaru. Imprisoned and captured...once again.

Like that time. When none of them were able to help.

Their eyes started to close...

...and then, darkness.

Chapter Text

Anastasia-sama has been supportive for the recovery of my well-being. It's a debt I can never hope to repay. She has been patient, observant, and understanding. I feel guilty for everything she had done for me, and so grateful at the same time.

She believed that I was her knight even if she didn't remember, and accepted me into her camp once again. Conversations were awkward at first, but things had slowly gone well over time.

I was given the status of knight after proving my strength and intelligence, someone worthy beside my lady. I was tasked to "interrogate" an archbishop, so I simply did so.

It was perfect, he might've known how to return my name. I just had to beat that information out of his mouth, simple enough. I did so, months and months passed. No information, no words. I grew more frustrated with each day. Why wouldn't he budge?

His eyes looked hollow, his breaths considerably weakened. He looked like a corpse sitting against that wall, hands and neck cuffed. Whenever our eyes met, a strange uncomfortable feeling always flared up within.

I realized in our final meeting, that he was not stubborn. He had simply given up. His soul was crushed, his hopes of ever feeling the wind forever lost.

Just a few days later, his execution was announced, and I was given the "honor" to execute the dreaded Archbishop of Pride. I felt proud, like I had achieved something.

But ever since that very day, the day his name returned...It was as if I had lost my sense of self, as if I was some stranger in this foreign body. Had I really done it?

I announced to the people of Lugunica of his misdeeds, all false, all forgotten. All unnoticed.

No one knows, and no one else has told the truth. That we killed him. No, that I killed him. I have lost my sense of self, the sense of pride I had as a knight. I had told her that I would resign from the camp.

Yet, Anastasia-sama told me to stay. She smiled at me with the most forgiving smile I had ever seen, like a saintess. Like a goddess forgiving her believer who had sinned. After that, she promised that she would do her very best to help me.

I feel conflicted, I feel like scum. I was the one to live, and he who died. Not only that, I have suffered no consequence, no punishment, no words of malice.

My name might've returned now, but I shall never recover from my mistakes and regrets. It will forever haunt me, and I can only do nothing but sit and observe. My lady's promises keeps me strong, but it only dwindles with time.

I always see his face in my nightmares, I always hear his pleas for the pain to stop. I can't sleep, I can't sleep. It haunts me, he haunts me. My wrongdoing haunts me.

That's why I...I-

- Mimi's entering!

The door slammed open as the orange haired demi-girl forcefully entered the room, arms up in the air. It seems like she had kicked the door open.

Julius' thoughts were cut as he she entered the room, the small shard of glass in his right hand dropping on the table.

- Wh...what are you doing here?

The purple-haired man stood up, hiding away his left hand in his back, something dripping on the ground.

- Oi, bro! What're ya doin?!

Mimi asked with enthusiasm, her tail wagging around.

Julius' eyes darted away from her in guilt, he ignored the heavy thumping of his heart, thinking of how to answer. Mimi tilted her head as she waited for his delayed response.

He looked at the girl, his lips curling up slightly to form a small smile.

- Nothing. I was merely looking at the view from the window.

- Ohhh! Mimi wants to see too!

She instantly ran towards him, jumping at his face and hugging his head, like some kind of cat. Well, she may be. Partly.

- mfbfffsf...

No words could form properly due to Julius' mouth being blocked off completely, but it was clear he wanted her to get off of him.

- Wow! The view here's kinda great, bro!

She cheered as she took in the view from the window, literally on his shoulders. It was night, the moon shining a dim blue whilst the stars shined.

The young knight gently grabbed Mimi's waist and carried her off his face. Julius placed her back on her feet on the ground, her tail still wagging.

- Sniff, sniff, sniff.

What was she up to now? Wasn't this enough chaos now?

Mimi crawled around the ground, trying to sniff out something.

- Wait! Why is there blood here?! Are you injured, bro?!

Julius panicked, his pupils darting around everywhere, trying to think of an excuse.

- I...Uh...I accidentally dropped a glass and...cut my hand.

She audibly gasped and grabbed his hand, inspecting the wound.

- Ah! You were careless, bro! This is why you should be careful around sharp things!

Mimi scolded the purple-haired young man, eliciting a small forced laugh from him.

- Ahahah...I apologize, Mimi. I didn't want to worry you. I promise to be careful next time.

- Hmmm...Pinky promise with Mimi, and she'll forgive you!

The girl held out a pinky finger towards Julius, looking at him seriously. He grinned at the girl slightly, his hand shaking slightly as they shook their pinkies together.

- Forgiven!

- Thank you, Mimi.

His blood still continued to flow out, it made him feel pain. Something he absolutely deserves. Yet, Mimi and the others continued to smile at him as if he had done nothing.

Because aside from his lady, no one else knew the truth. He was ordered not to tell anyone, so he kept quiet. If the whole kingdom knew of this, then the Selection will go into more chaos than it had been.

They couldn't afford that right now. As much as those who knew felt regret, they had to continue on.

He couldn't continue on, he simply lived because his lady needed him. Aside from that, he would gladly allow himself the release of death at any moment, like the blood that dripped down into the ground.

- Let's get this patched up! Come with Mimi!

The demi-girl held his hand gently, leading him to a bathroom. She looked for a bandage in a closet, she pointed at Julius as she grabbed it and closed it.

- Mimi will wash your injury! Tivey told me it's important to clean the wound before wrapping it with a bandage!

- Oh, I see. That is certainly helpful to know.

Julius walked to the sink in the bathroom, while the girl struggled and kept jumping to reach out for his hand. She's too short...

- AHHH! This is annoying!

- Let me assist you.

The purple-haired boy picked her up and placed her on his right arm, She smiled as she reached out to start the water.

- Heheh, Mimi and Bro makes a good team! But not as good as Tivey and Hetaro!

- Thank you.

Mimi started to wash his injury, leftover blood flowing out slightly. Julius smiled as she watched her wash his wound, like a parent observing their child. She was a sweet kid...well, chaotic...but sweet.

She reminded him of Suba-

Even now, that memory still haunts him. His hands started to shake, going colder than it was already. He stared into nothing, his eyes hollow.

- Bro? Bro! Ya there? Why're you spacing out?! Mimi's done, ya know!

The orange-haired girl screamed out to him, snapping the man out of his thoughts. Julius' eyes widened as his attention was brought back to the moment.

- Ah! I apologize, Mimi. I was just tired. I may need to go rest in my room after this.

He apologized, the girl pouting at him.

- Hmph! If you're sorry, then Mimi forgives you.

- Thank you, Mimi.

The two smiled at each other, the boy placing her back on her feet on the floor.

- Now, for the final touch...ta-da!

Mimi started to wrap the bandage around the cleaned wound, doing it very carefully.

- Ah, the pain's finally gone now.

- Heheh! It's all thanks to Mimi!

She proudly pointed to herself, her ears twitching and tail wagging.

Julius, in that moment, patted her head out of instinct, because simply...she's cute.

- Yes, thank you, Mimi. This is thanks to you.

- Mmm! Praise me more!

The purple-haired boy continued to give Mimi her deserved praises and pats for almost a minute, then stopped so they could get out of the bathroom.

- Then, I shall get going now. Take care, Mimi.

He bid farewell, starting to open the bathroom dooor. Then, Mimi stopped him in his tracks.

- WAAAIIT! Mimi almost forgot why she came into your room!

The girl called out to him loudly, as if she had realized something.

- Did you need something?

Julius looked at her with a polite expression, while the demi-girl tilted her head and put a finger on her cheek.

- Oh, yeah! Our lady told me to bring bro to eat dinner with us!

Mimi responded in realization, finally remembering why she even went to Julius' room in the first place.

- I see, then let us head to the dining room.

The door creaked open as the knob turned, a faint flash of purple and white in the other side.

- What're ya two up to? I heard some weird noises, and it turns out ya were slacking off here!

Anastasia scolded the two, bringing her hands on her hips.

- I-I apologize, Anastasia-sama. You see...

- Mimi was healing bro's wound! His hand got cut, so Mimi helped him!

The purple-haired woman nodded in understanding, a smile playing on her lips.

- I see, I see. But, did ya really injure yourself, Julius?

She asked with some slight worry, knowing not much could really injure her trusted knight.

- I apologize for worrying you, Anastasia-sama. I promise to do better in the futu-

- No, no, no. Ya don't have to say sorry, Julius. It's normal for people to make mistakes, so don't beat yerself up too much 'bout it!

Anastasia smiled at him reassuredly.

- ...Thank you. Really, I am really thankful to you, Anastasia-sama.

She had done a lot for him, and he was really thankful. She has been very understanding and patient ever since that day, ever since he didn't feel like the Julius everyone knew.

His lady didn't give up on him, and told him to stay. That together, they would resolve this.

- Now, let's go! Dinner's waitin' for us!

- Yay! Mimi wants to eat!

- I shall follow.

The three went on to the dining room, smiles plastered on their faces. The others had been waiting for them, conversing as they did so. Dinner was a homely experience. Hetaro and Mimi created chaos, Tivey constantly calming it down, Anastasia and Ricardo laughed at the trio's shenanigans.

It felt warm, too warm for someone like him. His smile was always tense, always forced. It felt disgusting, that he of all, was allowed such a privilege. To be given so much, despite deserving nothing of it.

He can't forgive himself, he wouldn't ever. This was the hell of his own making, and it was something he should be experiencing. Because it was the only way he could compensate for his mistakes.

They felt so distant, so close, yet so far away. Like an invisible infinity was drawn between them, and only he could feel it.

He felt like an outsider, someone that shouldn't be there in the first place. Yet, he was. No consequences, no punishments, just rewards. For committing a grave crime, to Subaru...and to himself.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

- Then, I'll get goin' and get back to workin', Julius.

Anastasia bid farewell as she started to walk towards the direction of her office in the hallway.

- Wait, Anastasia-sama. Are you sure you don't want me to-

- Ah, ah. I already told ya, Julius. Recovery first before work.

The purple-haired merchant interrupted the worried knight, pointing out a finger, having already promised him to let him rest before continuing his duties.

Not that he could help much in his current state anyways, his mind was a jumbled mess, and that would just get in the way of Anastasia's work.

- I see...I understand. I shall go rest in my room then. Take care, my lady.

- Right, see ya later, Julius.

The young man politely bowed before slowly walking away, heading off to his quarters.

He didn't feel very well after that, he has yet to recover back a stable state of mind, one currently in shambles due to trauma from Subaru's death. He had done it, with his own hands.

Living with himself was difficult, and only the others that supported him kept him strong.

This was not just about his friendship with Subaru, but his beliefs and value as a knight...and as a virtuous person. Or atleast what he thought he was. Remembering how he had felt back then, he questioned his own self.

When things get desperate, was violence the only thing he could resort to? If things turned ugly, will he reveal the deepest, darkest emotions that always surfaced in himself? In everyone?

He wanted to convince himself, that it was merely a natural reaction. But that didn't mean he was safe from the disgust he felt for himself.

Julius arrived in front of his door, entering the room with an exhausted expression. The walk towards his bed was a slow one, his sight glued to the ground. As soon as he got beside it, his body merely dropped on the bed defeated.

Being miserable sucks, but it was the least he could experience to repent. No...It's not repent. It's a just punishment. Although light, too light for what he had done.

He fell on his back, his body thudding against the soft mattress of the bed. His eyes looked at the ceiling hollowly, a thousand thoughts brimming in his mind.

What else could he have done to prevent it? What would've happen if he realized sooner? What if he had trusted that uncomfortable feeling when he saw Subaru? What if...What if...

Regrets, far deeper and stronger than what he may have felt before surged.

He didn't want to close his eyes, because he would just be met with that same nightmare.

A wooden platform, a rope, a body hanging. Cheers, joy, achievement. Terror. Regret. Shame. Fear.

He laid on that same position, unmoving. His breaths were slow, as if taking each one of them was shameful to even attempt.

If they knew, they are sure to be angry. They are sure to punish him severely. No one knew, Anastasia silences him. It was advantageous, logically. Morally, it was degrading.

He could barely think of himself as a knight, only because his lady desired him to be so.

Cutting his own hands sounded like a good idea to keep these thoughts away, because the pain always made him get his bearings back. He remembered Mimi.

Julius doesn't want anyone to know, it's too risky...He doesn't want them to be disappointed of him anymore than now.

The knight laid on the bed with a tired face, continuing to think...and think and think...and think.

Before he even knew it, he had finally snapped back to reality.

Sighing heavily, Julius got up on the bed, leaving the room in a very slow and tired manner. The hallways were now dark, no lights on. Only the moonlight seeping through the windows provided for his vision.

How long had he laid there? It didn't feel too long for him, but it seems like all of the people had retired to their rooms. He was probably in that same position for a while, just thinking.

He can't sleep. He doesn't want to. He wants to look for an excuse not to sleep, so he headed for the balcony, enough to keep him awake at least.

The purple-haired young man walked along the hallways, his footsteps thudding lowly. He opened the door for the balcony, closing it as he got on it. The view was as refreshing as ever...the mountains, the grass, the trees, the night sky, the stars, the moon, and Ricard-

- Oh! What're ya doin' here so late?

The demi-human asked enthusiastically, just leaning against the stone railings of the balcony.

- Ricardo. I apologize for the interruption.

- Ahahah! No worries! But, why're you here? Gettin' some air or somethin'?

Ricardo questioned once again, finding the appearance of the knight in here so late at night strange. He'd never seen Julius be up so late, much less outside of the mansion. Probably because of his knightly virtues crap...like "always sleep early!".

- Just...I can't sleep.

Julius answered, breathing in and out deeply. Like he was mustering out the courage to answer.

- Hm...are ya perhaps having some terrible nightmares?

Terrible? That might be the worst understatement of his whole life.

- Yes. I fear closing my eyes would...give me them once again.

The knight answered tiredly.

- Oh, sorry for the sensitive question. There anythin' I could help ya with?

The demi-human politely offered a helping hand, noticing something was clearly bothering the purple-haired man.

- No, you don't have to. I'll try to fix it myself....

Receiving more than he already had didn't sound like a very good idea for Julius, after all, he's a knight. He has to be independent, strong.

Getting so much help from his lady, his comrades, his friends...while Subaru received nothing...he didn't want to receive any more.

- I see. Then, good luck with whatever yer battlin' with.

- Thank you.

Julius smiled at Ricardo, to which was given a smirk as a response.

- So, what brings you here, Ricardo?

The purple-haired knight asked, as he had thought that all of the others might've gone to sleep by now.

- Ah, nothing too important! Just reminiscin' some old stuff with the triplets.

The demi-human answered with a nostalgic smile.

- Oh. Come to think of it, Mimi helped me clean and bandage my wound.

- Heh! That's what I'd expect! But, what'd get ya injured?

The mercenary wondered, as Julius was pretty much one of the strongest in the kingdom, with his status as a spirit knight. He didn't hear of the knight getting sent off to some quest or something, too.

- I...blundered and cut myself with a piece of glass.

Julius responded, a panic almost escaping him. He got too careless with his words, he doesn't want him to find out.

- You..wha...Ahaha...AHAHAHAH! So, even a great spirit knight like ya can still make silly mistakes from time to time, eh?

- Erm...yes.

Ricardo aggressively started patting his shoulders, laughing out loudly.

- Still...from a shard of glass? I thought it was some assassin or something!

- One would think so ordinarily.

That didn't stop the demi-human from continuing to laugh. In fact, it merely fueled it even more. Seriously, Julius was TOO uptight.

This didn't feel too bad for Julius though, to have someone to talk casually with...like...

- ...and what're yall doin' out here so late at night?

A voice from the hallway called out, instantly catching their attention.

Julius and Ricardo tilted their heads towards the entrance of the balcony which slowly opened. Anastasia entered the balcony with a smile, greeting the two. Her left hand rested against the fabric of her scarf, as if trying to comfort herself.

- Oh, my lady! Get this! Julius here...

His voice started to drown out, his mind overflowing with thoughts. Even now, his face still haunts Julius. He won't ever leave, he'll keep on torturing him like this, something that the knight deserved.

He really thought for a second there, that Ricardo could've been like Subaru, someone that could call him Juli...someone he could drop his knightly act with. Someone he could tell stories to, someone to listen to him.

The knight wished for a connection like that once again, because unconsciously, he wanted help. Something he was always trying to reject, because he felt undeserving of it.

- ..lius! Julius!

His lady's calls made him snap out of it, finally bringing himself back to the situation at hand.

- Oh, I apologize, my lady!

Julius expressed his apologies quickly, having not heard her.

- Ya were spacin' out! Tired? Ya should go back to your room and sleep.

Anastasia looked at him with some slight worry.

- ...yes, I will do so, my lady.

- Good night then, brother.

Ricardo bid goodbye as Julius bowed to them.

- Then, have a nice evening, Anastasia-sama. Ricardo.

The purple-haired merchant waved as a response. Julius exited the balcony, walking back to his room with a somber expression. He was really thinking of it, huh? A close friendship.

Ricardo didn't seem too bad. The knight didn't really have much of a good image with mercenaries, but the demi-human didn't really make that image. In fact, it was the opposite.

He was pretty professional, except for him using such casual words with his employer, Anastasia. But she wasn't complaining, so maybe it was alright.

Talking with him didn't feel too bad too, it was pleasant. Far more than just wallowing in his own misery and nightmares.

Julius opened the door to his room, entering and heading straight to his bed. The door was slightly open, but he was too tired to open it back again. Sleep. That's right, he needed to.

The window was left open, moonlight shining from it. The wind blowing against the flowing curtains.

That's what he needed, right now. He just hoped that this time...he wouldn't be getting those nightmares again.

The purple-haired young man closed his eyes, slightly anxious. Before he knew it, fatigue and drowsiness had already caught up to him, and he was fast asleep.

Unbeknownst to him, a faint glow of blue pupils flashed in the slight opening of the door. Purple and white slightly visible in the shadows. Their look was focused, solely on the sleeping figure of the knight.

- Not enough. Not yet.

It whispered, a quiet, female tone. A distorted voice, as if possessed. Their hand resting on their white scarf.

Without even knowing, something or someone had already made its appearance in their camp. Their home.

Chapter Text

More and more time had passed for the people in Anastasia's camp, but for Julius, it was as if time was stopped.

There seemed to be no hope in ever recovering from the darkness he was experiencing. He tried. He tried very hard to keep those thoughts away. To forgive himself, and to forget.

But the nightmares always haunted him every night, and it grows worse and worse with each passing day. Guilt and regret weighed down on him, chaining him, keeping him still in that stopped time. Forever.

The only thing that stopped them momentarily was cutting himself, and that proved to be less and less effective the more he did so. Not only that, his disappointment in himself was increasing the more frequent he committed the act. Misery claws his mind like a hungry wolf, growing more vicious as he suffered in silence.

He doesn't want to burden them, yet he wants to ask for help. For support. Empty promises, empty words...that was all he could get, because asking for any more help was shameful.

Because he's already weighing them down right now, he's done nothing to help, and has shown no signs of recovery.

The bedroom that he once felt was safe in, was starting to feel more like a prison. A hell of his own making.

Was this how Subaru felt too? No...It was probably even worse, not even adding the fact that he faced terrible torture every single day. Except for that, the raven-haired boy was isolated, all by himself.

He wants to leave, to get out and talk to someone about this. But right now, facing anyone in his current state...the idea just dissipates into nothingness. He wholeheartedly believed that they were disappointed in him, he doesn't see it...but he feels it.

That's why he doesn't want to go out, because he would have to face them head on, and see that disgusted look in their face. He doesn't want to see it. The outside world was starting to grow farther and farther away from him.

He only laid that on that bed, wallowing in his own misery. Every time he felt that surge of regret, every time he remembered his mistakes, he had the urge to just grab and rip out his own hair.

He wants to cut himself, and save himself the misery, but someone might find out...someone might know. It was a close call with Mimi, if she found out, then everyone would've known that he was harming himself. Then, they'd grow more and more disappointed with him. They'll be disgusted with him.

He doesn't want anyone to know, he doesn't want them to hate him.

Julius still hears those pained screams, every time his blood was boiled, every time his nerves were fried, every time his limbs were cut. Even now, he can still hear them in the back of his mind.

So he tries so hard to cover his ears, hoping for them to stop. Yet, he wouldn't.

The purple-haired boy laid on that bed in a fetal position, covering his ears. He muttered pleas for them to stop, to give him peace he was desperate for. A lone tear escaped his eye, his hands shaking terribly.

Knock, knock.

Someone had knocked on his door, followed-up by a voice from a woman. His lady.

- Julius? I heard ya haven't went out since yesterday.

Wiping away his tear, the purple-haired knight quickly got up to rush to the door. He quickly opened it, revealing the messy state he was in. Unkempt hair and eyebags.

- You...are ya alright? ya ain't lookin' particularly well.

Anastasia asked with worry flashing in her expression.

- ...Please do not worry about me, Anastasia-sama. You must be busy with work.

Julius responded with a tired voice, eyes on the ground.

- Ya look terrible.

The merchant commented with concern.

- I apologize for my appearance, I'll fix it post-haste.

The knight apologized politely, bowing to his lady.

- Ya better! Your meal's ready, so go to the dinin' room once yer done.

He almost forgot that he hasn't eaten since morning, he should fix himself up and eat his lunch.

- Yes. Thank you, Anastasia-sama.

- Also, I've got a meeting ta go to later, so come join me, Julius.

Julius wondered if it'd be alright for him to be there, considering his unstable state of mind. He hoped he wouldn't get in the way or something along those lines.

- Are you sure, Anastasia-sama?

She nodded at him with a smile.

- Yes, so make sure that ya look yer best!

- Then, I shall.

Julius reluctantly agreed, if it's his lady's wish, then there is no room for no's. He is her knight, so he must simply obey.

- I'll get goin' now, so take care, Julius.

- Understood. Please remain well, Anastasia-sama.

She started to walk away, into the direction of her office. Julius closed the door lightly, walking in to his room. He walked up to the mirror, looking at his messy appearance.

He didn't really look well, she wasn't exaggerating. That proud knight he saw in himself was gone, reduced to this miserable, hollow man.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The meeting went well for both Julius and Anastasia, much to his expectations. He feared that he might slip up at some point, but nothing of note happened. The purple-haired knight maintained his composure throughout the whole thing, and merely guarded his lady.

But that did not help make him feel any useful, all he did was stand and watch. Occasionally adding in if his lady asked for his opinions.

He was just a bystander, an onlooker. He didn't feel like a proud knight, he didn't feel like himself. The robes that he wore, the knightly attire he should be pride in...it feels alien. Strange, unfamiliar.

Many hours had passed by then, yet for some reason, a lingering sense of suspicion he had felt towards Anastasia. She didn't feel like the lady he knew, a little different from it. Those calculating eyes, that gaze that reads your every expression...they were all lost.

The sharpness and accuracy of her words against traders and merchants, it all didn't feel the same somehow.

There was this soulless gaze in her eyes sometimes, as if peering into the nothing, into the void. She doesn't even hold her prized scarf anymore, knowing how much she valued it.

But this suspicion that he felt, it felt criminal for him. Doubting his lady, the one he should loyally served. Why must he feel this way? He doesn't like it.

He hates it. He hopes it was all wrong, and that she was simply changing like any other human being.

Because to doubt Anastasia, would be to betray his whole and only belief of staying as a knight. He should be loyal, he should have more trust in her than anyone in the whole world...so, this suspicion he was feeling. It's criminal, it's taboo for him.

Yet, he can't help but feel it. There was something off about her. He just can't prove it yet.

Julius opened the door of the carriage for her lady to exit, then he guided her out of the transport as he gently held her hand.

- Thanks, Julius.

- Yes...You're welcome, my lady.

He closed the carriage's door as its coachman drove it off in the distance.

- Let's get inside! I'm dyin' for some food!

- Yes, Anastasia-sama.

The two walked towards the entrance of the household, Julius holding the door open for his lady to enter.

- Eh, still quite the knight, aren't we?

- I'm merely acting as I should, my lady.

Anastasia teased the purple-haired knight, to which he blushed and coughed with his fist.

- Don't be so uptight now. Let's head inside.

- Understood.

They both entered as the young man closed the door, the sunset from outside blocked off. It was already almost evening when they arrived, just perfect timing for dinner.

Ricardo, Joshua, the triplets, and the servants greeted the two as they entered the lobby.

- Heya, m'lady.

- Oh, the boss' finally here!

- G-greetings, Anastasia-sama.

- You shouldn't talk to our lady so casually, Mimi.

- We greet you, Julius-sama, Anastasia-sama.

The servants bowed and smiled as they greeted the two.

- We're finally back! I trust dinner's been made?

- Yes, Anastasia-sama.

- Then, let's go eat.

The whole group then went to the dining room to have their dinner. The servants placed the plates and utensils for them, the fragrance of the freshly-made and warm food filling the room.

Dinner was as always, lively, with the triplets around. Long after, the sun had already sunk below the horizon. The sky is as dark as deep ocean waters, the moon enveloping the world with its dim light.

For some reason, Anastasia wouldn't let Julius help her with work. So, the latter had retired to his room once again, stuck in his own thoughts. Didn't he do good during the meeting?

He thought that his lady would have more confidence in him and let him work now. Yet, she wouldn't. She insisted on his recovery first.

Julius really wants to help, to be useful. This feeling of uselessness was not comfortable for him. He wanted to do something for his lady.

Is it because he's not enough? Is he still useless for her to use? What can he do? What should he do?

The feeling of doubt and suspicion he had for her made him feel even more guilty, that her supposed loyal knight would not believe in her. Not only that, he couldn't be of any use to her.

Yet, she was still kind enough to let him stay. To continue to be her knight, even if in name only. If she didn't, then he would leave and disappear from society. Because he can't find any reason for him to continue being himself, for he had already betrayed what he had believed himself to be.

- Why...? Julius...

A faint, familiar face in the distance. Fog covering most of his vision in what looked to be a forest. A figure with raven-hair and hollow eyes. His hair seemed colored a gray.

One he didn't want to see, no courage to face. The person he had committed the gravest sin he had ever done.

- Believe me...Why didn't you believe me?

If only he did, if only he trusted his intuition...then things wouldn't have ended up like this. He was foolish then, and even now, he still is. He dares to doubt his lady now.

- If not for you...! If not for you, then...!

It was all his fault, he should've done something. He should've helped instead of making it even worse. He was the one who extended his suffering, and ended it. Harming himself was not enough to pay for this sin.

- ...I would've lived! I would have lived! I WOULD HAVE LIVED!!!

As Subaru screamed, Julius' eyes snapped open. Sweat was forming on his forehead and around his body. It was still late in the night, the crickets chirping.

He looked at his own hands, his wrists riddle with faint scars. No matter what he did, he would still fall asleep, and he would get the same nightmare...again and again.

Julius' hands were shaking, his pupils dilated. He could hear his heart beating loudly, his ears ringing.

That nightmare was worse than the last one. He has to forget it, he has to.

The purple-haired boy wiped away the sweat from his forehead, getting off his bed. He felt thirsty from all the sweat he was producing, he should leave and drink something. It'll be bad if his lady noticed and scold him again.

The door creaked open as he exited his chambers, his feet thumping lightly against the fabric of the carpet of the hallway.

As expected, everyone had already fell asleep by now. The whole estate was dead silent, only the nocturnal creatures and insects making sounds. The light from the moon seeping through the windows in the dark hallway.

He noticed a light still open in a room, it was his lady's. She was still awake at this hour?

Maybe, she was working still. Either way, it was a great chance for him to talk to her about it.

- Anastasia-sama...? It's me, Julius.

No response. Only silence.

- My lady?

Julius tried to call out again, yet no voice would answer. Did she fall asleep? No, she wouldn't leave the lights open...

He's worried that something might be up, so the purple-haired boy hesitantly clutched the knob of the door, twisting it.

- I'm...entering, my lady.

There was no response. The door of Anastasia's room opened lightly, in hopes of not waking her up if she was sleeping.

In the desk were piles of paper, ink and writing tools. The chair was positioned in a way that seemed like someone had got up from it.

His eyes scanned her bed, expecting the merchant to be sleeping on it. Yet, she was not there.

- Anastasia-sama?

Julius looked around the room, walking to the side of her bed. Then suddenly, he clenched his nose.

The smell of blood and rotten flesh.

It was reeking from that closet, which had blood splatters on its handle.

What was this? Is it a dead animal? But what is it doing in the closet? How did it even get inside the estate in the first place?

Eager to know, for his lady's safety, Julius opened the closet.

As soon as his eyes met the sight, he almost vomited. It was not he was expecting, not at all. It was not what he thought he would see.

It was what the last thing he would want to see.

Tears came out from his eyes as he backed away in disbelief and horror.

His eyes dilated, his whole body shaking. He almost fell on the floor in shock.

There hanging in the closet, were chopped limbs of many humans, strewn about like they were in a meat market. This was only something a true monster could do, something with no heart.

Rotten guts and bone clattered in its small space, hanged or dropped.

Dried blood was splattered everywhere inside the closet, and the stench could knock anyone unconscious.

They already looked so rotten, as if it had been a while there. But that's not what shocked him.

It was the decapitated heads of his friends, of his brother.

There were no eyeballs nor teeth, and there were numerous scars around their face. As if they were tortured for a while, then killed.

Two of the triplets, Ricardo...

Who had done this? Why? Why?

He's failed them again, what could've done this? How could have he let this happen?

How much useless was he going to be? He was sleeping like he had no problems while this happened, while they were suffering.

The flurry of emotions hit Julius like a wave, its current dragging him deep into its waters.

No, no, no, no. This can't be it. He just saw them a while ago, and these looked weeks old. They were alive, they were smiling! This can't be, this couldn't be...

He has to make sure, he has to check on everyone in the mansion.

Julius attempted to make his exit out of the bedroom, the feeling of horror and desperation clear in his expression.

- Oh dear, you found that?

A familiar voice echoed, which stopped him in his tracks. In the doorway, a figure with purple hair and white robes stood soullessly still. She seemed to be holding something in her hand.

- A-anastas-...No, who...WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!

There was a wicked smile on her face, her eyes a deep glowing red.

- How mean...that's not how a knight should act, dear Julius...You shouldn't bully your lady, you know?

- SILENCE! I NEED TO KNOW! WHERE ARE THEY?! WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY?!

Julius screamed with anger flashing in his face. What happened to his lady, where are his friends? Where is everyone?!

- Heheh...Let's just say...somewhere far.

His eyes widened as she responded heartlessly as if she was mocking all of them.

- WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?! WHAT DID YOU DO TO THEM?!

- Nothing~ I just paid back what's due, my friend-murderer, Julius-kun~.

- YOU!

In that instant, he tried to charge towards her blinded by fury. But he stopped as she threw something towards him, a faint glimpse of orange hair was enough to stop him.

Julius hit the floor and grunted, catching what she threw at him.

- ...no...

It was Mimi's head, decapitated. Her eyeballs and teeth were missing like the others.

- No, no no, no...NO!

He held it in his arms as he sat up, his tears flowing out. The shock, the anger, the sadness, it was all to overwhelming for him. Too huge of a burden to carry.

- NOOOO! JOSHUA! MIMI! EVERYONE!

There was no else but him. All of them were murdered, and he knew nothing about it. Those people he spent time with, they were not his friends...they were illusions created by whatever this monster in front of him was.

They were already dead weeks ago, and he couldn't even do anything. He was only holing up in his room, being useless.

It was true after all, his instincts were right. That something was wrong with his lady, with Anastasia. No, was it really her? It wasn't...

Something was possessing her body, and it killed everyone he knew.

- AHHHHH!!!

Julius cried out in sadness and anger mixed together, holding what was left of Mimi tightly in his arms.

- Stop crying like a baby. You deserved this, after all, you're just USELESS TRASH!

The possessed Anastasia mocked the knight with its distorted voice, her smile widening.

- ...you...YOU! I'LL KILL YO-

Julius placed Mimi's head on the ground, getting up to pounce in anger at the merchant. His hands reaching out to strangle her neck.

Yet, he couldn't make it.

He simply fell down on the floor, the glimpse of his arms and hands being cut the last thing he saw.

This monster...what manner of monster was he facing...? He couldn't even do anything...

His lady, his brother, his friends...they were all gone. All because of him. Because he had done nothing. Because he killed Subaru.

Everything was his fault, and now he dies in vain.

- How disappointing. It's this easy when you're blinded by rage? Either way, I've gotten what I needed.

The entity sighed as Julius' body stopped in the air. Then in an instant, it was cut up into tiny small pieces, his blood spraying all around the room.

It disappeared after absorbing some form of negative energy that only it could see.

A day later, it was reported that the whole Anastasia camp was wiped out by seemingly an unknown force. All that was left were corpses and blood in the dead estate, the servants were all killed in a brutal manner.

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In the world enveloped by the void and darkness, the only one conscious in it was the raven-haired boy. The rest were caged like him and in an unconscious state.

Subaru couldn't believe it. It was that easy...for that monster. It killed all those people with such terrifying ease and calculation. It planned everything ahead before executing it.

He couldn't stand the sight of those innocent people being tortured and murdered so brutally.

Why would this monster do such a thing? What did it want?!

It appeared once again in the world of shadows, this time, the purple-haired boy's body appearing and caged in shadows.

Like the others, a white card appeared in front. Before he even knew it, the entity was already in front of him.

- What the hell are you looking at, you shit?

- Huh?! Shut up, YOU MANIAC!

It looked at him with slight annoyance, its smile gone.

- You better silence before I make it worse for you, trash.

- Oh yeah?! Try me then, pussy!

Then it frowned, its white dotted eyes turning a blood red.

- Oh...the things I would do to you if I could...Don't test me.

- HAH! That's a pussy for you, huh?! ALL BARK NO BITE!

It frowned even more, then it paused. A small smile started to form on its face.

It reached its hand out towards Subaru, a strange dark energy flowing out of its body, then to the raven-haired boy.

- Wha-what the hell is thi- ACK!

Subaru clutched his head in pain, a torrent of memories flowing in his mind.

A memory of that loothouse, of that mansion, of that field, of that accursed city...It all slowly came back to him.

And then, that hellish prison.

- I-I...Wha...

He looked at his hands, trembling and shaking. He could remember it now, the memories which he should've forgotten.

The raven-haired boy's eyes looked at the unconscious figures in the void in shock.

- What the hell is this...Wha...

He threw up as more and more memories filled up in his mind.

- Stop...STOP...!

His body dropped from the mental exhaustion and fatigue. He could remember his deaths, his pain, his traumas. Why must he remember? He didn't want to. It was better not knowing.

He doesn't want to remember. He doesn't want to remember the pain, the betrayals, the sacrifices...It hurts, it stings...

Dying hurts, dying is scary. He doesn't want to remember...

Subaru clenched his head, his ears ringing loudly. His vision started to blur and darken.

His eyes started to close slowly, his mind shutting down. He lay fetal as he started to passed out, trying to cover his ears.

His whole body was shaking, his heart beating quickly.

He could only see that shitty entity smiling as if he had won before passing out.

And then, darkness.

Chapter Text

The entity sat upon its dark throne, looking upon the various cities of Lugunica in its space-rift screens.

- Now, that all of the pieces are gathered. It's time I set up the stage.

It smirked, as its body started to flicker away from the void, teleporting back to the dragon kingdom. Watching him from behind was the hollow Subaru, his back against the shadowy bars of his cage as the entity disappeared.

He was silent, his eyes completely losing their light.

Subaru finally remembered, who he was and what happened to him. He saw what happened to them, at first, he felt like he was avenged...now he was disgusted of himself for feeling that way.

That incident...it wasn't their fault, right? It was Gluttony's. But, he can't help but feel that they could've a least listened to him...considered the possibility he was innocent.

He laid his body, his eyes completely distracted. He covered his ears, not wanting to hear anymore thoughts. They wouldn't stop. He can't stop thinking.

This darkness, being inside of this cage. All of it was starting to get to him.

That evil monster, he did so many brutal, cruel things. But there was nothing he can do. He's weak, he's incapable, he's too useless right now.

The thought of helping them wasn't comfortable to him, he felt petty towards them. He doesn't want to be involved with them. He HATES them. But it is true that they were innocent in all of this. In the grand scheme.

His parents wouldn't approve of him not doing anything for these people. Even now, he knows they are worried for him. They might still be looking for their foolish son.

Why had he distanced himself from them? Why couldn't he be honest?

If only he did, he would've lived with them in happiness...He wouldn't have to suffer for these people that only betrayed him in the end.

But it wasn't their fault, right? It wasn't...it wasn't. He wished it was. So at least he could justify this hate towards them.

So, the least he could do...was to do whatever he could. To hinder the entity for as long as he can.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was a very cloudy day, the streets were somewhat dark even during the day. Rain could pour at any moment. The people of Lugunica murmured in the streets as they were gathered around a board with news on it.

- Is this really true? Unbelievable...

- Yeah! It seems the Emilia camp, Crusch camp, and Anastasia camp had been ruined! All of their important figures are gone! The servants are all dead!

The onlookers discussed with each other with shocked expressions.

- Then, what about Subaru-sama?

- We don't know...he hasn't been mentioned in this article at all.

Most of all, they were worried for the young man they called a hero. One of the greatest knights to have ever lived in Lugunica, helping with the death of multiple Archbishops and two of the three Great Mabeasts, even killing the Great Rabbit and Sloth with his own hands.

It's safe to say that he had earned their love and trust, by ridding the world of these calamities and making it safer for people to live in.

Rain lightly started to pour from the sky, the sky growing darker and darker.

Then up into the air, in the heights. A figure floated, coated in its own darkness and energy. It had a twisted smile on its face, its palm directed at the city and the citizens.

- Hey! What's that up in the air?!

- H-huh?!

Some knights gathered and looked at the entity in the sky in wariness.

Before they knew it, countless balls of fire had been summoned to its sides, each one as massive as a building.

- Watch. This is the kingdom you all protect...and it will soon fall. Heheh...HAHAHAH!

They all saw those massive fireballs, capable of destroying buildings with ease.

- WHAT THE HELL?! RUN!

The citizens began to run away from fear, the knights standing still in horror of its immense power. Only a Great Spirit...or Roswaal was capable of magical prowess like this.

No, maybe even more than the magician.

It laughed in glee as the immensely large spheres of flames were fired at the city in great speeds, not giving anyone a chance to escape.

- AHHH!!!

People screamed as they grew closer and closer, the knights growing more desperate to get them somewhere safe.

A serious of huge explosions played out as all of them landed on the city. Buildings fell and caught fire, their debris falling on the ground and even on people.

- MOM! MOM! HELP!

A child called out in fear as her leg got stuck, crushed by a huge fallen concrete. His mother nowhere to be found, most likely dead due to the explosions.

- SOMEONE HELP! PLEASE!

A woman cried out as she covered her ears, her body laying on the ground.

Knights ran about as they tried to help as much as they could, and the entity merely observed with a wicked smile on its face.

- Don't think its over, yet...HAHAHAHAH!

It laughed gleefully as it fired more and more of its flames. The city being quickly overwhelmed by its power.

- Damn it...WHERE'S THE SWORD SAINT?!

A knight screamed out as the entity merely continued its attacks with overwhelming force and speed, seemingly neverending.

In the fiery distance, a burning figure walked like predator hunting its prey. Their body burned with flames, yet their stride remained strong. There were burning claws coming out of their knuckles, their eyes were burning a bright red and bloodlust was clear from their expression.

- I have to find them...I'll kill them...then It'll save Crusch-sama...

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In the Astrea household, Reinhard gently grabbed Felt by her shoulders as he kneeled, his face showing concern and worry for her.

Some part of it had been destroyed due to the explosions and debris flying everywhere.

- Felt-sama...I'm afraid I cannot leave yo-

The golden-haired girl gritted her teeth, pushing his arms away from her.

- Cut it out!

- B-but, Felt-sama...

The red-haired knight tried to argue, knowing that his lady wanted him to leave and protect the people. But her safety was his priority, he can't just leave her defenseless in this dire time.

- I don't care! Reinhard, you're supposed to protect the people!

She gritted her teeth in frustration. Even now, he was still being like this? Simply unbelievable.

- Get off your ass and help them, then! You're the Sword Saint, aren't you?!

- But as the remaining two of the dragon priestesses, your safety mustn't be compromised...It is only you and Lady Barielle that remains.

Reinhard reasoned, not wanting to leave Felt to fend for herself without his protection.

- And so? You'll just leave those people by themselves? To die?!

- N...No. I can't...I have to protect...

He looked down on the ground, contemplating on what he should do. He can't leave her behind, yet he can't just abandon the people of Lugunica in their time of need.

What could he do? What must he do?

- I'll go somewhere safe...so just go on! Do your job, you bum!

Reinhard swallowed the lump in his throat, he didn't want to regret losing someone he held dear because of him. But at the same time, he cannot forget his own code as a knight. He has to protect the citizens.

- I...Felt-sama...Please promise me that you will be safe.

He held her hand gently, looking into her eyes with concern. Hoping she would reassure him of her safety.

- I got it! I promise I won't die! I promise I'll be safe!

She assured her knight, knowing she would be fine with her capabilities.

- Take care, my lady...

Reinhard let go of her hand. He disappeared in a red blur, taking one last look at Felt as she smiled at him.

- You too, Reinhard.

In the fiery city, a flash of red blurred across with great speeds, saving civilians before they knew it.

A civilian looked in shock as he was saved from being crushed by falling, burning debris.

- Please get to somewhere safe.

Reinhard pleaded as he resumed his unbelievable dashes. Saving all that he could.

The knight took a look up above the sky, the entity still showering the defenseless city with its powerful fireballs. He noticed that the other knights were trying their best to help the innocents.

- Reinhard-sama!

One of them called out in surprise, hope filling up in his eyes.

- All of you, please coordinate with each other and save every civilian that you see. I will go and stop that thing.

Reinhard ordered, the knights nodding in response.

- Understood, Sword Saint-sama!

- Then, I wish all of you well.

The red-haired knight leaped up into the air towards the entity, the knights looking at him in awe.

- That's the Sword Saint for you...

- This isn't the time to be idling around! Move!

- Let's go!

They all got moving as soon as one of them made them snap out of their thoughts. The knights went back to assisting the panicking civilians any way they could. Because of Reinhard interfering, the entity had stopped firing his fireballs and engaged in a battle.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Back to Felt, she stood in the damaged Astrea mansion in her lonesome. There was a thoughtful expression on her face, looking into nothing.

- Hm...I gotta try and help somehow...Innocent people shouldn't be dying cause of that thing.

She muttered to herself, clutching her chin. Then an idea popped into her head.

- That's right! The knights must be busy helping the people now, so I just gotta create a safe place for 'em! I'm so smart!

The golden-haired girl grinned to herself as she looked around her surroundings. A small part of the mansion has been damaged, but it was still functional. The yard was a great place to place any injured in, now that the assaults of flames has been stopped. Reinhard must've attacked that entity by now.

- Just gotta place all the necessities and it should work out.

She was sure there were many medical resources stored up somewhere in the mansion. She'll have to get their servants to help her out.

- Felt-sama!

A man with a huge stature called out as he exited the estate in a hurry.

- Oi! We gotta prepare to take casualties in, so help out!

- Huh?! Shouldn't we go to somewhere safe instead?

The man reasoned, as it may still not be safe for them yet.

- Listen to yourself! Reinhard's battling that monster so there'll be no attacks to the city anytime soon.

Felt spat back with determination, knowing she could help people who were struggling unlike before. She lived her life trying to survive in the slums, then she was suddenly given such a huge change in her life.

She became a candidate for the throne, much to her dismay, but it is true that it has taught her many things. Even if that nagging Reinhard was annoying and irritating. For the people who did not have as much luck as her, the least she could do was help.

And this time was one of those.

- Felt-sama! We gotta go now, please!

A man with a slim build and grey hair pleaded with the golden-haired girl.

- Yeah! Let's go!

A young man with a short stature and bowl cut added in. They were TonChinKan.

- Ahh! Shut up, you fucking cowards and help me!

Felt screamed in frustration, giving the three chills in their spines.

- Yes, madam...

They whimpered in unison.

The four worked together to create a small safe point for any injured and casualties, putting all of the necessary medical materials in the yard.

From there on, they went to the city and had the knights help them escort the civilians, injured or not, to their small evacuation center. It took a while, but it had finally been filled up.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

As this went on, the air quaked in tension. Reinhard moved with such lightning-fast speeds and unbelievable power that it threatened to destroy his surroundings, his slashes leaving cracks and dents wherever it landed.

Their battlefield had been abruptly changed as he kicked the entity into the outside of the city, though it proved that it did no damage. At least, the city won't be taking any more damage.

The forest was noticeably damaged and leveled due to their clashes. Even Reinhard had pulled the legendary blade out of its sheath.

It didn't seem interested in the knight, nor in the destruction of the city. It was looking for something, or someone. After all, why damage it when it had the power to eradicate it? Because there was something it needed.

- Why attack Lugunica? I don't understand, with so much power, why do you not choose to protect?

The entity smiled, its darkness growing.

- Ah, Reinhard. Still quite the good boy, huh? No matter which universe I visit, you are always the constant.

Reinhard looked at it thoughtfully, wondering what it meant by those words.

- What do you mean by that?

- You don't need to know, doggie. After all, you'll soon be eradicated.

Both of them glared at each other, ready to battle again at a moment's notice. The creatures around them had run away moments ago, sensing their power and danger.

- You are powerful enough that even the dragon sword Reid approves of you as an opponent. Only a few in the whole world are able to achieve this, so I won't be holding back.

- Of course! If you did, you wouldn't notice! All I had to do was to just distract you away from your beloved lady.

Reinhard clearly and slightly frowned from that, a slight worry flashing in his heart.

- From Felt-sama? Don't tell me...

- AHAHAHAH! You let your guard down, knight! Maybe if you just stayed by her side, she would still be alive!

The red-haired knight looked at him in confusion, yet he sensed no lie in his statement. Something must've happened to Felt. He has to go back right away. He has to return to Felt. To his lady.

As soon as Reinhard turned around to go back to the city, the entity blocked him off with its darkness. Gritting his teeth, Reinhard slashed away at it in formidable speeds, turning it into a dissipating mist of shadows.

- Too late! Too late!

The entity disappeared into the air, laughing at Reinhard as it slowly faded away.

Reinhard ignored its taunt and dashed forward to the city, turning into a red blur alike a lightning bolt.

- Felt-sama...please be safe.

He muttered to himself, a tinge of worry and suspense clawing away at his heart. If she really was...dead. Or if she was hurt. It'd all be his fault.

The fires had yet been put out, still burning strong. He looked around the ruined city, devoid of any civilians or knights. There were bodies lying on the ground, a sight similar to the one during Priestella's siege.

The cloudy sky refused to let any light seep into the world, darkness embracing everything. Reinhard finally arrived at where he left Felt at, at their home. The Astrea mansion.

A figure in the large yard appeared, its silhouette the only thing visible due to the flames around. It had cat ears, and flaming claws. In its hands, a young girl with red hair. Her lifeless eyes closing, blood dripping out of her mouth. Her heart impaled.

Around them, Gaston, Rachins, and Camberley laid on the ground dead. Their torsos impaled by the figure's searing claws, their blood pooling on the ground, amongst countless other corpses from both civilians and knights.

- No...

It looked at the red-haired knight, blank expression with blood splattered on its face.

- ...Felix? Is that you?

The two stared at each other, as the flames continued to burn around them. Reinhard looked at him in disbelief, a small smile playing of the demi-human's lips.

- Ah...Reinhard. Hello, friend.

He threw away Felt's body on the ground, thudding. Felix responded in a blank voice.

- Why...? What have they done for this to happen?

Reinhard asked in a low voice, glaring at the demi-human. His fists clenched up, the expression on his face tensing.

- I have to do this. For lady Crusch to return.

The red-haired knight felt a knot in his heart, regret forming inside of it. He looked at his lady, presumably dead. Why had he left her behind? Now, she was dead because of him.

Because of his slothfulness, because he didn't stay by her side.

As soon as Felix blinked, Reinhard had disappeared. The demi-human looked behind him, seeing the knight carry his lady's unmoving body in his arms. Her eyes were closed, as if she was merely sleeping peacefully.

The young knight wiped away the blood near her lips, an unexplainable feeling welling up inside him.

How monstrous he was, even after seeing this, he was still unable to shed tears. Maybe this is why he didn't deserve to have any friends, to have any meaningful bonds with anyone.

He killed his grandmother, his father and grandfather hates him, and now he gets his beloved lady killed. Because he wasn't there for her when she needed it most. Why was he always late? Why couldn't he arrive on time? Why can't he save anyone he loves?

- I won't let you go, Reinhard van Astrea...

A distorted voice called out in the distance, its feminine figure lighten up by the burning flames of the city. She held a blade made out of darkness in her hand, half of her being completely shrouded by shadow.

Her flaming red hair left messy, her eyes glowing a bloody red like the demi-human's.

The clouds darkened to almost pitch black, rain starting to pour down into the city. Reinhard gently placed Felt on the ground, an unreadable expression on his face.

Now, with no one left to comfort him, he must face his greatest fears. Facing his own friend and his grandmother. His blade remain sheathed on its sheath, unable to be drawn.

If only he stayed. If only he was insistent. If only he was rebellious.

He couldn't. He had to obey his lady's order...But, in the end, it was all for nothing. All of it was in vain.

The rain started to put out the fire slowly, pouring down at the three in their stand-off. Then, a mist of shadow appeared out of thin air. The entity smiled as it observed thoughtfully.

All of it was his fault, because he didn't do enough. Because even with all of his strength, he still wasn't enough. He was never enough.

If only...If only Subaru was here, then things wouldn't have turned out like this. He wished Subaru was here, to make things alright. After all, he was the only one capable of handling these disasters.

Casualties were always low if it was him, and he would always turn the table around if fate didn't feel like it was on their side.

He wasn't, he was dead. Because of his slothfulness. Because Reinhard didn't help Subaru in his time of need, because he was away on a mission that proved to be in vain.

Why was he still called the Sword Saint? People called him that, yet he couldn't feel like one.

Everyone he ever loved either died or disappeared. Because he was insufficient, he let all of this happen while he was away.

A faint voice called out in his mind, a memory with her amongst countless others that he wouldn't ever forget.

- Listen, Reinhard...you're too kind for your own good! If you don't do anything, people will take advantage of you!

Even if he can't see her face in that memory, he still vividly remembers her voice, her tone.

- I apologize...I don't follow.

- What I'm trying to say is...if you really are mad. Then feel free to get mad! It doesn't matter if people think badly of you because of that! Stop blaming yourself for everything!

She grabbed his shoulders and looked at him dead in the eyes.

- Because I know you'll only ever get mad for good.

That unexplainable feeling inside of him, started to burn. As if his body was burning with life and emotion. He could feel it himself, the glare forming in his eyes. The frown on his face, which was always masked with that hollow smile.

Oh, he was angry. For the first time in his life.

The entity felt chills for the first time he was in this place. It wasn't expecting Reinhard to be like this, this shouldn't be happening. This can't be.

He was supposed to give up, facing his own failures.

Power bursted forth from the knight's body, his dragon sword Reid drawn from its sheath.

- You've angered me, entity. You have done too much to this kingdom, so I shall have you pay in full.

Reinhard glared at his three opponents, ready to battle and clash.

I promise, my lady. I swear I'll uphold your words and live true to it.

The entity had surrounded him in its darkness, placing them in a whole different dimension to battle. It can't risk getting its stage destroyed so soon. It left Theresia and Felix in the city, waiting for the captured camp members to be placed there.

The two clashed, shaking the very dimension to its limits.

In the capital city of Lugunica, the camp members were teleported to different locations. Three killers actively hunting them down.

Now, the game begins.