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Chapter Text

Hope is a wish everyone wanted to believe in. 

It comes in another form that all creatures yearn for: freedom. It wasn't a simple desire but a definite need. A creature, caged for too long, longs for a deeper need to be free and Zhu Yan understood that feeling better than anyone.  

He longed to be free, desperately so.

He wasn't meant to be caged in a single place for so many years. The very feeling for freedom started to turned into a flame of hope. A flame that burned until it stopped burning; for fire needed wood to continue burning. It will burned till nothing but ash was left.

It was the very same empty feeling Zhu Yan felt in his ashy heart. The reason: being chained and caged in a place called the Zhuo mansion.

He wanted to return to the place he came from. He was a creature that ran freely on the grassy plains in Dà Huāng. He would climb the tallest tree he could find, drink the freshest of waters that flowed through streams, and eat the sweetest wild fruits that grew.

That was what freedom was like for him. 

In a world where freedom was sometimes taken away for what secondary genders were, Zhu Yan kept his secondary gender a secret. He presented as an omega and kept it quiet by covering his scent of peaches and apple blossoms with dirt and leaves.

Zhu Yan could never imagine his life with a mate. He felt it would chain him to a single place, forced to bear pups and be docile. He was none of those. He never liked the idea of being kept in waiting for his mate to return or even care for a pup. He could barely care for himself with the likes of being a vessel for malicious energy.

He never wanted his own pups to bear that weight. A vessel to contain the worlds malicious energy was a greater burden. But he was never the kind to follow the rules. If he were to find a mate, he would rather court them instead of the other way round.

Zhu Yan built his life and reputation with ruthlessness and power. He earned the title as a Great Yāo, learning to control the malicious energy swirling in his vessel body. He was mistaken as an alpha from the covered scent and he kept it as that.

It wasn't until he went into heat, curling in his home with the heavy scent of peaches and apple blossoms on him that changed his life. It was this very same sweet scent that attracted a lone alpha who carried the scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth. An alpha that was equal in strength as him, carrying the title as a Great Yāo too.

Zhu Yan avoided the alpha as much as possible but they crossed path more than often. The pagoda flowers and fresh earth started to pull him in. Sometimes he would follow the scent unconsciously or the alpha would track his scent, vice versa. It became a game for them, chasing one another.

The land would shake when they chased each other. Rings of power was felt when they fought together and Zhu Yan found the thrill of it. His hand collided with the alpha's. Willow shaped eyes bore into him with a little smirk. It should be infuriating for Zhu Yan but he felt desire and excitement filled him.

Eventually, Zhu Yan learnt of the alpha's name, Li Lun.

Li Lun gave a low kick at Zhu Yan's feet. It struck the omega's heel, causing him to topple backwards. An arm slid around Zhu Yan's waist, pulling him close to pressed up against Li Lun's side.

Pagoda flowers and fresh earth engulfed Zhu Yan's senses and it made Zhu Yan's inner omega purr in delight. The scent, the feel of Li Lun's body pressing up against Zhu Yan's, sent a growing blush to the omega's cheeks.

Over time, the pagoda tree yāo was the one Zhu Yan fell in love with. It was unexpected for him but he didn't feel the disgust as some alphas tried to court him before. Li Lun was different and Zhu Yan appreciated his calmer demure.

Strong and steady like the very pagoda tree yāo he is.

Li Lun courted Zhu Yan differently. It wasn't the usual gifts or sweet honeyed words to entice him. It was the mock fights they have. A clash of power bursting between them before Li Lun cornered Zhu Yan up against any surface.

They were once caught in the rain. Heavy rain fell on them and Zhu Yan pulled him to the nearest cave he knew. Their clothes were soaked with rainwater, weighing them down and shivering with cold. They built a fire, to dry their clothes and warm their chilled bodies.

The closeness and their scents wafting in the air, mixing together was what made them inch closer. No words were spoken till Zhu Yan was pressed up against the smooth stone wall with Li Lun claiming his lips in a hungry kiss.

The kiss was nothing what Zhu Yan expected but it made him crave for more. He wanted to claim Li Lun as his alpha. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with him and the briefest of wanting a pup flashed in his mind. The thought of having Li Lun's pups made his abdomen clench with desire.

He kissed back with hands trailing over Li Lun's muscled back. Zhu Yan felt the growing hardness in Li Lun's pants but chose not to comment. Even his own body gave way to his desire. His cunt grew wet and his cock hardened too.

They broke their kiss to pant against their lips, staring into each other. Firelight cast a low glow in their eyes. Zhu Yan huffed an amused laugh and leaned forward, taking Li Lun's lips again in a slow but pleasant kisses while they wait for the rain to stop.

~~~

Zhu Yan dislike his heats when he went through it alone. The pain, the burning need to have something fill him, the aches that followed and the exhaustion. Things were different when you have an alpha with you. Li Lun spent the week with him during his heat. Zhu Yan had allowed Li Lun into his nest in his home, the very first person to enter and Li Lun promised to help him through.

The alpha left kiss marks and bites all over Zhu Yan's body. Three fingers slipped into his went cunt easily and spreading him open with globs of slick spilling out. His moans drove Li Lun mad with lustful hunger and it almost triggered the alpha's rut. Li Lun pushed Zhu Yan's legs apart, leaning down to lick a long strip from the base of his cunt to the tip of his cock.

Zhu Yan was no victim to pleasure, crying out sweetly. He writhed in his nest, tangling his fingers into Li Lun's hair and tugging on it for each lick. He moaned and groaned, giving signs for Li Lun to continue. It brought him to a quick orgasm. Cum spurted from the tip and slick gushed out, drenching Li Lun's lower face.

It was the first for Zhu Yan. A first of many things and it only continued to grow from there.

The day his heat ended, tangled in the sheets with Li Lun plastered to his back, Zhu Yan softly traced the back of Li Lun's hand. A nose buried in his neck, causing little goosebumps to rise on his skin. The air was heady with their scents, mixed together in making a harmonious blend of a spring garden.

Zhu Yan loved the scent. It brought him the sense of comfort, confidence and belonging. He felt happy for the first time of his life. He brought Li Lun's hand close to his chest, nuzzling it with a soft smile.

He felt and heard the low rumble on his back. He joined in with his own soft purrs and Li Lun recuperate by hugging him tightly.

Zhu Yan gifted Li Lun his most prize gift that he own: the Truth Eye, a few days after his heat. They sat by the stone beach, feeling the cold sea breeze ruffling their hairs when Zhu Yan stood behind Li Lun. He curled his fingers into a intricate circle shape and placed it over his eyes.

The sudden gift stunned Li Lun when Zhu Yan transferred the power over to him, pulling his hands away.

"Are you sure?" Li Lun asked with a furrowed brow. "You've seen through all of my disguises and tricks. You've even helped me perfected it, so why give me the one thing you can use against me?"

"Because I have you," Zhu Yan said. "There isn't anyone worthy to have my Truth Eye but you. You're the only one that I've wanted to give. Considered it as part of my own courting gift to you."

Li Lun huffed, pulling him down into his lap to steal a kiss. "Cheeky monkey," Li Lun teased and Zhu Yan settled nicely in his lap.

Li Lun left him for a few days alone before returning with his own courting gift. A bracelet made from the finest green jade he owned. A gift that was uniquely theirs with cravings of their yāo markings.

Li Lun slipped the jade bracelet onto Zhu Yan's left wrist. It was nearly as thick as Zhu Yan's thumb size in width but it was a gift that Zhu Yan treasured for life. It rested beautifully on him, heavy and grounding.

Li Lun pressed a kiss against Zhu Yan's fluttering pulse and scent gland. He gently nipped on it, coaxing for a taste of peaches and apple blossoms. It bloomed on his tongue before peering up at Zhu Yan's blushing cheeks.

A treasure they both held. A silent promise they made as their inner instincts chose each other.

Their love continued to bloom like a flower in spring. It changed with the season for the years they've lived but they would always return to one another. A pull that they've never felt before.

No matter how much they fought, playful or scathing, they would find each other again. Zhu Yan sat next to Li Lun underneath the Dianmu Divine Tree. The very same tree that they grew together, vowing as one to protect Dà Huāng as the Great Yāos.

But Zhu Yan isn't here to lecture or fight Li Lun. He's here as a courting mate and Li Lun silently stared at the ground. Zhu Yan rested his head against Li Lun's shoulder, feeling the minutely shift to be more comfortable for him. A small smile graced Zhu Yan's lips.

"What were we fighting about anyway?" Zhu Yan softly asked, feeling the rise and fall of Li Lun's shoulders.

"Human realm," Li Lun answered curtly before sighing again. "What do you even see in that world? They are nothing like us."

"They do carry the same as us. Secondary genders," Zhu Yan pointed out but he knew what Li Lun is feeling. "They have little exciting things to see. Something different from Dà Huāng."

"And better alphas," Li Lun mumbled but Zhu Yan heard him clearly.

Zhu Yan pushed up, cupping Li Lun's cheek in his left hand where the jade bracelet shifted. It caught Li Lun's eye but he chose to lean into his touch. Zhu Yan's lightly stroked Li Lun's skin with his thumb, studying his expression.

"My jealous alpha," Zhu Yan commented and Li Lun visibly shivered. "You're the only alpha that I want. The only alpha that I need and," he leaned close to Li Lun's ear. "The only one who can satisfy me for my heats."

Li Lun's eyes darkened. "Cheap trick but you're the only one that I have ever wanted to be with."

It warmed Zhu Yan's heart. He nuzzled the tip of Li Lun's nose, earning a playful growl before being kissed as deeply and sweetly, forgiving and wanting. As courting mates, they've helped each other with the cycle and Li Lun's cycle was no different from before.

Zhu Yan rode Li Lun hard and deep, feeling the thick cock spreading him open. He moaned loudly, tossing his head back and arched his back when hot hands roamed all over his body.

"Li Lun," Zhu Yan keened. "Li Lun, faster, faster."

Zhu Yan cried out in pleasure when Li Lun grasped his hips, rolling them over. Zhu Yan made a strangled noise in the back of his throat, feeling Li Lun snapped his hips hard and fast. It wasn't long till Li Lun's knot grew, locking them together.

A burst of warm cum flooded Zhu Yan's cunt, filling him up till he was heavy and full. Zhu Yan moaned weakly and his cock spurted cum along with his cunt gushing slick out. A mixture of cum and slick dribbled down Li Lun's cock and balls.

An arm wrapped around Zhu Yan's waist, pulling him down till Li Lun rolled them over to their side. His knot drove deeper followed by a twitch and a spurt of hot cum. Zhu Yan moaned again, curling forward till his back was pressing against Li Lun's chest.

Their hair stuck to their sweaty napes and Li Lun brushed Zhu Yan's hair away. He buried his nose into the same spot he's come to love the most. His fingers brushed the underside of Zhu Yan's chin where he felt the faintest rise of skin. He traced the line, gauging it was a scar that never healed.

Zhu Yan softly whined, pulling his chin away and pressed harder against Li Lun's knot. It brought Li Lun back to the present and he pressed a kiss to the back of Zhu Yan's nape.

"Be my mate," Li Lun whispered harshly against Zhu Yan's nape, feeling Zhu Yan freeze in his hold.

It was a question that they've been avoiding to ask for the years they've been courting each other. Zhu Yan has never thought of settling down till now. The answer was on the tip of his tongue and he glanced over his shoulder.

Li Lun waited for his answer with dark willow shaped eyes. Eyes that seemed to plead and Zhu Yan couldn't think of anyone other than Li Lun to spend his life with.

"Yes," he breathed, whispering the answer and Li Lun kissed him with a deep passion.

Their cycles synced up on a new moon night. Zhu Yan pulled Li Lun down into their nest, tangling fingers into his long black hair. Li Lun devoured him, kissing with every hard bite as their instincts drove them mad with the need to mate.

Their scent glands, swollen and red was the only indication that their cycles were in sync. Their teeth grazed their swollen gland on their necks. Flavours of peaches and apple blossoms, pagoda flowers and fresh earth. It was them.

Li Lun sunk his hard dripping cock into Zhu Yan's own soaking wet cunt. A low guttural moan left their parted lips. Li Lun set a pace for them, driving his cock deep and hard. He shoved Zhu Yan down into the soft nest.

Wet squelching filled their home—a cave that they found, hidden and deep—combined with Zhu Yan's moans, echoed deeply around. Li Lun grunted hard, fucking Zhu Yan. It filled them with passion and pleasure, tingling and nerve burning till Zhu Yan's cock throbbed and cum spurted.

Slick and cum, mixed together, spilled from Zhu Yan's stuffed cunt. When Li Lun's knot grew, locking them tight together, the alpha sank his teeth into Zhu Yan's swollen scent gland.

It was like fire burning their skin (metaphorically). It was hot, sending pain and pleasure racing through Zhu Yan's veins. It felt like a rush of being high on peach wine, the adrenaline racing through his nerves. It lit a part of him, connecting a more deeper instinct where his inner omega crooned in delight.

It purred, letting Zhu Yan know the feeling of an alpha's claiming bite was what he needed all along. Li Lun released him from his bite, pulling away to lick the blood from his teeth. Zhu Yan tilted his head and bit in return.

Something in them clicked like it was always meant to be. A bond was form. Both of their instincts rejoiced at being together, crooning and purring as one. Their feelings for each other was felt.

The love they have for one another bloomed bigger like the growing trees reaching for the sun. Their souls were intertwined like twisted roots of an ancient tree; neither could tell where it started or ended.

Zhu Yan licked the bite on Li Lun's neck, purring in happiness. He's finally claimed an alpha. Someone who viewed him as an equal and he kissed Li Lun before the alpha renewed his thrusting, grinding hard and deep till little pulses of pleasure and cum filled them.

Their marks will heal but the scar would stay.

They were forever bonded for eternity, for as long as they lived. Zhu Yan felt like he was home with Lun. Their mating marks were proudly shown. Human or yāos would turn their heads to see with jealous looks or giddy squeals.

A mated pair is always a sight to see.

Their union, in honesty, was nothing but a quiet proof between themselves and one of the Mountain Gods of Kunlun, Ying Zhao.

Marriage was a strange concept for yāos, never quite believing in it but Zhu Yan never cared for marriage. They were forever marked as one. Everyone knew and so did they.

But with happiness comes with despair. And a mistake that could never be undone.

~~~

Zhu Yan committed the gravest of sins—in his standards—of slaughtering humans and yāos. The reason was because of the tragedy that fell on his little family.

The price for this sin was death but being one of the Great Yāo's of Dà Huāng, he was pardoned from it. But the Baize Goddess made a decision that changed both Li Lun and Zhu Yan's lives forever.

"Rules are set for a reason," she said with a pity look in her eyes, despite knowing their union. "Even if you both bore the marks, Zhu Yan's sentence is heavy and this choice will ensure he lives. It'll keep him alive too."

"Lives?" Li Lun hissed, holding onto Zhu Yan tightly despite his ragged and injured self. "You're sending him to a different kind of death sentence. Demon hunters are what tore my family apart and it is them you are sending my mate too."

Zhu Yan's gaze slowly went up to stare at the Baize Goddess' face. Warm brown eyes on a kind face. But to him, there wasn't anything kind about being separated away from his mate. He switched his gaze to his fuming alpha and felt the fury through their bond.

Blood coated the side of Li Lun's face, dripping sluggishly and falling to the ground. Li Lun was favouring his shoulder and Zhu Yan knew why. His alpha tried to stop him but he injured him instead, scorching him with malicious energy, knowing that trees are afraid of fire.

Tears welled up in his eyes. He hurt his mate, his beloved and friend. Li Lun sensed his pain. His willow shaped eyes darted at him and Zhu Yan gripped Li Lun's hand tightly.

"To keep you alive," Zhu Yan said, cupping Li Lun's face, brushing the dirt away. "Is all I need right now. I can't lose you after…" his voice trembled, closing his eyes to stave off the grief. "I agree to it." He announced, opening his eyes with a determined look. "In return, no harm falls onto my mate," he hissed.

"Zhu Yan," Li Lun growled but his lips were sealed by Zhu Yan's own lips. "I'll find you. If I have to tear apart the whole world, I'll find you," Li Lun promised against Zhu Yan's lips when they broke away.

The only thing Zhu Yan could do was to keep his mate safe. So he smiled one last time despite the tears flowing. He nuzzled Li Lun, hugging him tightly and let the warmth he felt be the last to treasure.

He made his choice and was caged in a golden cage.

All in the name of a peace treaty between Dà Huāng and the human realm in terms of marriage. In other words, a contractual marriage but Zhu Yan felt it was more of a forced marriage than a contractual one.

A union between him and one of the oldest clan from the human realm. A clan that is said to be the descendants of the Bing Yi clan.

The esteemed Zhuo clan.

“A sign of good offerings,” the Baize Goddess smiled at them and they nodded in agreement. 

“In good will,” one of the Zhuo family members replied, glancing at Zhu Yan standing next to the Baize Goddess.

Zhu Yan wanted to spit at them but he held his tongue. He's grateful for the red veil over his face. A cover to hide his sneer and the tears shimmering in his eyes. Li Lun was locked away as punishment while he was dressed in clothes of red robes, waiting to be married.

He felt like an sacrifice offering instead of a bridal offering. After all, this was his own doing. His own punishment. His own choice.

An eternal punishment.

He was trapped in a pampered cage that he will never call home. 

As part of the agreement for this marriage, Zhu Yan, as an omega, was to birth an heir for the Zhuo clan. The reason was so that a Zhuo could wield the Yún Guāng sword, the heirloom that is passed down through the Zhuo generations.

A happy union as it should be. A mix of both bloods in hopes of awakening the sword. But the colder truth was Yún Guāng sword could never be wielded by the Zhuo clan.

Zhu Yan has seen the sword, laying dormant in the Zhuo hands. No matter what the Zhuos would do; prayers to cleansing to cultivating a perfect flow of meridians, they could never draw the power from the sword.

Yún Guāng was wielded by Bing Yi, who was said to be the greatest demon hunter—Zhu Yan knew that he wasn't human—and the sword was forged from Ying Long's bones and horns. The quieter truth was the sword has a temper no one expected and it chose to be wielded only by Bing Yi.

When Bing Yi died and the sword was passed down through the descendants, the sword laid silent. The Zhuo clan believed it will choose its new wielder one day. But such a temperamental sword made it harder for the Zhuo clan to harness its power.

Zhu Yan wondered if the sword can sense him and his current predicament. He shook the thought away as he was escorted to his room through the quiet hallways of the Zhuo mansion.

The room was sparsely decorated with the bare necessities from what Zhu Yan can see. The bed was large to accommodate two or three people and Zhu Yan hardly spared it a look. Curtains long and light, hung from the ceiling. It was a mock display of being airy; hardly provided any cover or protection. The doors were pulled shut with loud creaking.

Zhu Yan saw between the doors gap was an empty courtyard with a little tree sapling planted in. He knew what they were doing. Isolating him and keeping him confined to his room was their way of telling him, he's nothing but a tool.

Zhu Yan still dressed in his wedding robes, sitting obediently on the bed but he knew no one would come through the doors. After all, he is just a bride to them.

They never fulfilled the marriage and Zhu Yan was left as a bride in waiting.

The room Zhu Yan was locked in was called Frost Pavilion and it lived up to its reputation. The sun barely shone through the gaps of the trees and partings of the curtains. The temperature of the room remained cold from the cold mountain air breezing in.

He missed the warmth from his home and Li Lun pressing up against his back. Zhu Yan never felt cold but for the first time, he felt it in his bones. The clothes he was gifted—luxurious and soft—barely kept the chill away.

The first few months was cold and boring. Zhu Yan spent most of his time lying in bed or sitting by the veranda, chasing the sun. The doors to his room unlocked one day when he was sitting by the low table.

The Zhuo alpha walked in with a lacquer box. Zhu Yan was wary but he greeted the man he was betrothed too. A smile, small and knowing, was given to him.

The lacquer box was placed on top of the table and the cover was opened. Twin gold bracelets were sat on a black velvet cushion. The Zhuo alpha—a name Zhu Yan has forgotten and never bothered to learn—slipped the gold bracelets on Zhu Yan's wrists. One sat next to his jade bracelet and the colours were a bright contrast.

Unfit to be near Li Lun's gift.

The gold bracelets glowed brightly, making Zhu Yan suspicious when trails of inscriptions suddenly appeared. It wrapped around the length of his arms. It slithered around slowly like a coiling snake, never tightening or releasing. The gold inscriptions were hard to decipher from what Zhu Yan can see.

“A gift from us to you,” Zhuo told him with a lying smile but Zhu Yan never believed it.

It wasn't a gift but a shackle. A way to bind him to them.

A golden punishment.

~~~

Zhu Yan made his first attempt of escaping after many years of being confined in the room.

He was agitated, pacing the floor like an anxious animal. He didn't dare leave the room for in fear for Li Lun's well-being. He doesn't know how his mate is and it was slowly driving him mad. Only through their bond that he can feel Li Lun's quiet emotions.

Peace was upheld. He hasn't heard any bad news or gossip of yāos running to Tiandu and Zhu Yan silently felt relieved. In truth, he could easily break free from here but he promised himself to keep Li Lun safe and never dared till now.

The sun was barely shining into his room and he shivered from the sudden cold draft. He heard the door to the kitchen in the pavilion unlocked; an unused little kitchen that was covered in dust.

He quickly hid in the shadows, plastering himself as close to the wall as possible. The years he's lived here, he hardly saw anyone entering to attend to him. The maids or servants that came in would run the moment they spotted him. No one dared to serve him and Zhu Yan preferred it that way.

He's memorized the timing of when the kitchen door would be unlocked. The very same for the servants would scurry through when they see him. Like clockwork, the servants would come to quickly change the sheets and fill the well of water for him in the kitchen.

They entered with fresh sheets in their arms while looking for him. When they didn't see him, they began their job with hurried movements and Zhu Yan took his chance.

He slipped through the open door. There was hardly anyone around when he did a quick scan. He didn't want to waste a single moment, he ran through the open halls. His long red wine hair fluttered behind him like a red river. His almond shaped red eyes were locked on the path ahead of him.

He wanted to see Li Lun again. He wanted to hear his reassuring voice and scent his comforting scent. It was Zhu Yan wanted and he sent that very same emotion through the bond. It was recuperated with Li Lun's own longing.

So Zhu Yan ran.

He saw the front doors in front of him, left ajar with sunlight spilling through. He smiled a small smile, hope filling him. He reached for the door handles when the gold bindings on his arms lit up with a bright gold glow. Pain suddenly seared through his skin. 

He collapsed to the ground with a cry of pain. It felt like fire was scorching his skin and it continued to burn. His skin started to blister from the heat, turning black around the edges.

The doors closed shut, blocking the light from him. His eyes widened at the light disappearing. No, he thought. It dawned onto him that it was a trap. A show of how easy it was to subdue him in this place.

He closed his eyes, wincing in pain and groaned quietly. Echoing footsteps stopped behind him, alerting him of his alpha. A fistful of his hair was grabbed hard. They pulled him up, wrenching his head back without a care. Zhu Yan snarled at the burning pain, snapping his eyes open and glared at the Zhuo's angry eyes. 

“Where do you think you're going, yāo?” Zhuo spat. “Did you think you could escape from here? Those binds on your arms will stop you from escaping. Quite a unique gift, hmm? A way to alert me if you try something."

“Why…” Zhu Yan groaned, feeling his neck stretched further than it should. 

“I know of the lives you killed. This is a precaution and to keep you in check, yāo," Zhuo growled, dragging Zhu Yan along and the white ape yāo screamed in pain. “Did you think I would marry you? Fulfil the agreement? I would rather gouge your eyes out than have you birth me an heir!” 

"Then you shouldn't have agreed to the fucking agreement!" Zhu Yan screamed at him.

"Wretched yāo."

Zhu Yan clawed at Zhuo's arm. He spat curses, scrambling to free himself but the binds glowed brightly. Pain rippled through him and it was agonizing. The more he clawed at Zhuo's arm, the more pain he felt until Zhu Yan stopped clawing him.

It really was a weapon to use to prevent him from hurting Zhuo.

The path felt long and slow. Zhu Yan felt his hair was being ripped from the roots but he waited until they reached Frost Pavilion. He was heedlessly tossed back into his room. He curled into a tight ball on the floor like a wounded animal. He wanted the burning pain to end and the gold light dimmed for the burning stopped too.

"As your first punishment," Zhuo growled, lifting Zhu Yan's left arm up and slipped the jade bracelet off. "I'll be taking this. A priceless jewellery on you is worthless."

"No," Zhu Yan weakly cried, reaching for the bracelet before he was shoved back.

"You should have thought better than to escape."

His room doors slammed shut with a lock locking. Zhu Yan gasped in relief when the gold light disappeared. He pulled his sleeves away and found his skin blistered and burnt. He hissed in pain when he moved and glared at the closed doors. 

He felt empty without the jade bracelet. The only gift he had from Li Lun that he could keep was now gone. His wounds healed from the low malicious energy and Zhu Yan slowly stood up with clenched fists.

His life has changed and Zhu Yan grew to hate it. 

~~~

He hated his secondary gender even more. Being an omega in heat in an unfamiliar place has made his inner omega whined with distress. He hadn't thought much about his cycle, always knowing it will start the same time as Li Lun's ruts would. Without Li Lun around, Zhu Yan has to rely on his own instincts and gauge the days.

He wondered why his heat didn't come on time, and put it as possible stress and grief from being separated from Li Lun. His heat cycle finally came and he wished it didn't.

The familiar burn in his abdomen was low and simmering. His heat scent slowly thickened; a way to entice any alphas to come when his body thinks his mate is dead. He felt an ache in his limbs and the deep desire to build a nest.

He ignored those needs, not knowing if building a nest—something so private would be allowed—would cause an uproar by the Zhuo alpha. He groaned softly as his back started to hurt as he laid in bed. He mentally braced himself for the day his heat would start.

The first night of his preheat, he was trying to rest when he felt slick oozing from his cunt. The low simmering heat burned hotter till it was a full heat. He curled into a fetus position, wrapping his arms around his aching abdomen and his cunt pulsed with slick. His hard cock dripped with precum, creating a growing wet spot in his pants.

It grew uncomfortable as more slick and precum soaked his pants. His clothes began to stick to his body, making it even more uncomfortable.

He bit the bottom of his lip, stopping himself from moaning softly. He can't afford to make a sound. He doesn't want his body to be touched by Zhuo or anyone but his mate.

He buried his nose into his arm, pretending it was the scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth. He squeezed his eyes shut, closing his legs tightly together, feeling slick spreading over his inner thighs.

Zhu Yan remembered how Lun's hands would rub against his back, helping to ease the ache. The alpha yāo would lay kisses against his heated skin, gently wiping him down with a cold washcloth to cool his heated body. When his heat would spike higher, Li Lun would slowly fuck him, making sure he was comfortable before fucking him hard and deep when he begged for it.

All of it was nothing but a past and memory. He laid in his room, alone and shivering from heat. There is no one to help him and Zhu Yan wished for death for the first time.

On the second day of his heat, Zhu Yan managed to build a messy small nest of blanket, sheets and whatever pillows he could find in his room. He built it in the furthest corner of his room, away from any prying eyes to avoid alerting Zhuo. He hid in a corner—behind a folding screen—where light doesn't stretch far.

Zhu Yan laid in the pathetic nest. A small part of his instincts softly crooned at the little comfort. He longed to lie in the silk and soft cotton sheets Li Lun used to gift him. The material hardly made his skin itch during his heat.

But now his skin felt itchy and his hair stuck to his sweaty skin. He whined softly in annoyance before hurriedly taking his clothes off and tossing it away. He laid naked in his nest with an easy sigh.

The cold mountain air helped to cool his heated skin, even for a brief moment. The heat continued to burn and the need to be breed. He slipped his own three fingers easily into his soaking wet cunt. He moaned softly, slapping a hand over his mouth to stop himself from alerting anyone.

His heart thundered loudly in his ears but no one entered his room yet. He kept his hand on his mouth, fingers sliding wetly to find a short moment of relief. He thrusted his fingers in an offset rhythm, imagining it was Li Lun's fingers. He shuddered when slick rushed out, drenching his fingers at his first relief.

He sighed through his nose softly, pulling his hand away from his mouth. The room doors were suddenly kicked open. He pulled his fingers from his cunt, grabbing the blankets and pulled it over his naked body.

Loud shouts and pleas could be heard. Zhu Yan, in that moment of clarity, smelt a new scent. A scent of wood and water, an alpha scent. Zhuo's alpha scent.

Zhu Yan's eyes widened. He quickly wrapped the blanket around his body, pressing himself close to the wall in hopes of staying quiet.

Sounds of thrashing nearly made him whimper. He bit his bottom lip but knew his heat scent would give his spot away. The gold binds on his arm lightly lit up and he shook his arms. A shadow fell above him. He glanced up and found Zhuo standing in front of his nest.

A red flush decorated the man’s cheeks with the thickening scent of an alpha in rut. Zhuo's clothes were dishevelled, like he was pulling on it to find some sort of relief.

Zhu Yan didn't like his current situation. He internally cursed at this fate. To be in heat while the Zhuo alpha was in a rut. What a terrible way.

“Leave us!” Zhuo yelled and servants scrambled to leave them, closing the doors shut. “You're the only omega around here,” he said and Zhu Yan felt dread swelling up. “And we're going to uphold the damn agreement.” 

“No!” Zhu Yan cried when the alpha growled, lunging at him and pulled the blanket away. Zhuo grabbed hold of Zhu Yan's wrists, holding him tightly. “Let me go!” Zhu Yan yelled, struggling against the hold.

He threw a hard kick to the alpha’s head. His wrists were released. It brought him some time and in his heat weakened state, Zhu Yan scrambled out from the nest. He ran on shaky legs towards the door, ignoring his naked state.

He needed to escape from the room. He needed to leave and return back to Dà Huāng. 

Zhu Yan crashed hard against the room door. He fumbled for the door handle. It rattled from his actions but the door never budged. His eyes widened. The servants had locked the door, trapping him with Zhuo.

Zhu Yan cried out loudly when his hair was grabbed, turning him around. A slap resonated loudly in the room. It stunned Zhu Yan with a stinging cheek, and left him disorientated. The gold binds lit up in response to Zhuo's anger.

“Fucking omega,” Zhuo growled, pulling Zhu Yan along. “I told you, you can't run away. Not when the binds are still on you and we are completing the treaty here and now!” 

“I'll never mate with you, human!” Zhu Yan snarled and he was thrown onto the floor. 

"We'll see about that," Zhuo hissed. "If you weren't an omega, I wouldn't have cared about you but yet you're the only one who can end this rut faster."

"Get off! I thought you wouldn't dare fuck me." Zhu Yan grinned, feeling the need to rile the alpha man.

"The current situation has changed," Zhuo growled. "Hold still, fucking yāo."

Zhu Yan fought desperately against the man’s hands, kicking and screaming at him. Zhu Yan threw a hard punch and he received one in return. He didn't care when his abdomen clenched with pain or the way his sweet heat scent had taken a bitter and sharp scent of fear in it.

All he needed to do was escape.

“Stop.” 

Zhu Yan froze. He felt the ripple of the alpha command sink through his limbs, making him stiff. His eyes widened at the alpha command given to him. He couldn't believe the human alpha had used an alpha command on him.

What's worse was his body responding and recognising the command easily. Treacherous omega instincts that curled in desire to obey. The only difference was the command would last a few seconds since it wasn't his mate's alpha command.

That few seconds was enough for Zhuo to climb on top of him. 

Zhu Yan's arms were pinned above his head. Zhuo leaned down, pressing his nose against Zhu Yan's swollen marked scent gland and gave a lick. Peaches and apple blossoms along with pagoda flowers and fresh earth bloomed on his tongue. It was sweet and lovely, making his alpha instincts rumble with desire and need to breed the omega below him.

The mistake Zhuo made was lifting his head up. A mated omega can easily break free after a few seconds.

Zhu Yan headbutted Zhuo and shoved the man off when he groaned in pain. Zhu Yan scrambled to his hands and knees. He felt weak from the alpha command but forced himself to crawl on the floor to get away. Slick dripped down his thighs and knees, making the ground slippery for him to move. He slipped a few times, cursing at his own body.

“Freeze, you stupid yāo.”

Zhu Yan's body froze again. He slipped on his own slick, crashing to the floor with a pained grunt. A hand grabbed the back of his neck, squeezing it to prevent him from moving, and his hips were pulled up. He was held down like a helpless animal. His knees were shoved open by Zhuo's own forceful actions until the tip of Zhuo's hard cock grazed Zhu Yan's wet cunt. 

“You're going to take it and be quiet,” Zhuo snarled with another alpha command and shoved his whole cock in one hard thrust. 

Zhu Yan choked on his voice and the sudden burning stretched of his cunt. He felt the command rippling through his body, making him feel sick. He clawed at the ground, suddenly wishing his heat hadn't come.

He couldn't even scream. The alpha’s command had a choke hold on him this time with the multiple layers. It made his nerves burn in agony and his instincts screamed at him that this wasn't his alpha. 

It wasn't Li Lun. 

Forceful hard thrusts sloppily filled Zhu Yan's cunt. Squelching and Zhuo's loud moans was disgusting to listen.

Zhu Yan's instincts twisted with a disgusted feeling. It told him to fight and he struggled but the tight hold on his neck prevented him from doing so. He felt helpless as his heat continued to burn. His cunt was abused and stretched by the large growing knot.

Zhuo moaned loudly, filling Zhu Yan with a flood of cum. It locked them together and Zhuo grinded his hips against Zhu Yan's cunt, pulling him closer. Zhuo's cock throbbed and spurts of cum joined with the growing feeling.

Zhu Yan felt vile and disgusted. He hated how his body responded by cumming too. His cock pulsed with cum and cunt dripping with slick. He heard Zhuo chuckle, muttering how much of an omega whore he was.

It made Zhu Yan feel sick.

The next few days was agonizing for Zhu Yan. His heat burned and Zhuo's rut continued. The days felt long and cold, despite the amount of sex they had. Zhu Yan's instincts went silent after the fourth round of sex.

He laid on the floor, moving in time with Zhuo's thrusting. He felt like he a chained animal, unable to escape with the gold binds glowing on his skin. Their cycle ended, and Zhu Yan laid on the dirty floor covered in slick and cum.

"You're really nothing but a whore to use," Zhuo said, tying the strings to his robe with shaky fingers. "But I'll give you credit, you're good to have to end this rut cycle. Clean yourself up, yāo," leaving Zhu Yan with a hard slam of the doors.

Zhu Yan shifted his legs before biting his bottom lip tightly. A flood of cum gushed out from his overly abused cunt. He grimaced at the sticky feeling and he hated it. 

He hated everything about his own situation. He weakly cleaned himself from a bucket of cold water he pulled from the well. He used the water sparingly, unsure of when the servants would fill the well again. When he was done, he hide in the shadows, nursing his aching body, and the servants came to clean his room.

He naively thought it was the end but it wasn't.

~~~

Zhuo's rut cycle had synced with Zhu Yan’s heats. Sex was inevitable since Zhuo hasn't found a wife yet. On their synced cycles, Zhu Yan found himself being held down and his cunt was fucked sloppily. It never gave him any sort of relief and he took it with a blank gaze.

He was nothing but a pleasured omega to be used and from the coupling pregnancy was inevitable.

"That bride yāo is pregnant with the master's pup," a servant whispered to others, having spotted Zhu Yan's abdomen swelling with a pup, despite his efforts to hide it.

It angered Zhuo when he came barging in.

Zhu Yan snarled at him, wrapping a protective arm around his swollen belly where their child—his pup—was growing. His instincts were in overdrive. It screamed at him to protect his pup. It was too dangerous to be in here.

Zhuo pulled Yún Guāng Sword out, pointing at Zhu Yan's pregnant belly. “How dare you!?” He yelled and Zhu Yan gripped the edge of the wooden railings of his room. “How dare you carry an abomination!?” 

“What did you expect when you fucked me during my heats?” Zhu Yan answered with a hard growl. “Isn't this part of the treaty? I birth an heir for you,” he grinned. “And this is the result of our union.” 

“The moment that monster is born, I'll kill it!” 

“I dare you!” Zhu Yan challenged. “You can't wield the sword nor even use its powers. It's useless in your hands.” 

“I'll rip it out of your bloody womb and kill it in front of you!” 

“Get out!” Zhu Yan screamed and his eyes glowed red.

His scent turned protective and his finger tips glowed red. He flicked his fingers, sending Zhuo flying out of his room. Another flick and the doors closed shut.

The gold binds activated. Inscriptions twirled around his skin, burning him as punishment. He groaned in pain but his only thought was to protect his child. He breathed through the pain, holding onto the railings tightly to steady himself.

"I won't let you die here," he whispered to his unborn pup, cradling the underside of his pregnant belly. "I'll find a way for us to be free."

He needs to leave this place.

His pregnancy progressed smoothly and he grows tired each day. His room door was locked and no one opened it. He's heard the low whispers of Zhuo having found his mate from the servants standing outside his door.

He didn't care about the gossip but he knew his time was coming to end soon. If Zhuo's new mate births him a heir, Zhu Yan would be disposed of. He wracked his mind to find a way to escape. He's too big and heavy to escape now. It'll make being caught easier and Zhu Yan felt a growing fear from his bond.

Li Lun was feeling his emotions throughout the entire time and was sending him mixed feelings. Panic, fear, agitation frustration, longing and worry.

Zhu Yan touched the mating mark, suddenly wishing Li Lun was here to help him again. Over the years, Zhu Yan has only felt little emotions from Li Lun through the bond. It grounded and reassured him whenever he needed it.

Zhu Yan wanted to see him again.

The day he went into labour, he heard the sound of cheering and bells of marriage. He knew who was getting married. He didn't have to think when pain rippled through his body in the agonizing long hours.

He stuffed a ball of cloth into his mouth to stop himself from screaming in pain. He can't alert anyone about his current situation. His thighs shook from the strain of parted open. He felt the burning pain of his cunt slowly dilating for the birth.

Each minute was torturous and he forgot how much labour hurts. The first child he had with Li Lun was smooth. Li Lun's steady touch and scent grounded Zhu Yan during the labour. Their little baby was born until tragedy struck their little family.

A hard contraction snapped him from his memories and he reached down to feel the baby’s head was crowning. He couldn't do this and started to panic.

Hot tears streamed down his face with his hair plastered on his sweaty forehead. He wanted Li Lun so badly and felt a pulse of reassurance from the bond. It helped to steady him, pausing the panic and was what he needed.

He grunted at another contraction. He felt his body and instincts guide him in this birth. Without Li Lun by his side, Zhu Yan has to rely on his instincts heavily. He pushed when he felt the need to. Each push was torturous and painful.

He grunted in pain, reaching down for the final push when the baby slid out of him. He caught the baby, quickly lifting the newborn pup and spat the cloth out.

The baby's cry was loud and good, making him smile. The little thing was covered in a mess of birth fluids and blood. Zhu Yan silently picked up a clean cloth beside him and gently cleaned the baby. He found out he had given birth to a baby boy. 

His baby boy's eyes opened, revealing a pair of grey blue eyes. A trademark of the Zhuo clan. His son closed his eyes with another loud cry. Zhu Yan quickly wrapped the newborn in a soft blanket before softly groaning when another contraction happened. He bit his bottom lip when something else slid out. 

The after birth.

He panted hard, forgetting about the umbilical cord still attached to him and his son. Zhu Yan let his instincts guide him again, shakily tying a string around the umbilical cord before slicing it with a sharp clawed fingernail. He hushed his baby tiredly, lulling it to a quiet coo when he heard a loud gasp and a tray clattered to the floor. 

His head shot up, finding a servant staring at him with wide eyes. She must have come through the kitchen door and found him in this state. She ran out of the room.

Zhu Yan didn't know which was better. Her fleeing away or Zhuo coming in to find out he had given birth to their son. 

The latter was worse.

Zhuo appeared at Zhu Yan's door with his human omega wife. Their eyes were wide at the sight of Zhu Yan sitting in a pool of birth fluids and blood. A newborn baby cradled in his arms. He watched their movements warily, looking for signs of hostility.

Zhuo never disappointed him. The alpha's anger appeared faster than Zhu Yan could think. 

The man stormed his in with Yún Guāng Sword drawn. Zhu Yan feared for both himself and his son’s life. He clutched onto his son tightly, slowly shuffling back despite the ripples of pain pulsing through his exhausted body. His son was jolted awake and he cried loudly.

Zhuo raised Yún Guāng Sword high above his head, ready to strike the pair down.

“Wait, master, wait!” A servant yelled, grabbing tightly onto Zhuo's arm, preventing him from going further. “You mustn't!” 

“Move! I'll get rid of that abomination!” Zhuo screamed.

“Not on your wedding day, master. It'll be but an omen if you do. A terrible curse fill fall onto you,” the servant begged and Zhuo's new wife gently touched her husband's arm. 

“My love, it's our wedding night,” she said, glancing at Zhu Yan and the baby. “At least give them a few days.” 

A small but tight mercy. 

They left, leaving Zhu Yan alone with his crying son and he made his plan to escape back to Dà Huāng soon.

~~~

Zhu Yan let his exhausted body heal for two days before his son's imminent death before escaping again. He knocked a servant out when they entered his room with his one word spell. His son stayed asleep after being fed and despite Zhu Yan's aching body, he carefully picked his son up and ran.

He ran through the silent hallways like a ghost, hiding in the shadows. He checked on his son and the pup continued to slumber before he bolted out. If he encountered any patrolling servants, he cast a spell on them. He continued to pave forward, hoping to escape this hell.

He ran across the empty hallways, almost reaching the front doors when he screamed in pain. The gold binds on his arms burned brightly. Hot tight pain ran up his arms and his son, barely a few days old, cried his lungs out from being startled awake.

Zhu Yan fell to his knees, cradling his baby close to his chest as he breathed hard. He tried to hush his son's cries but the swaddling cloth was suddenly grabbed.

"No," Zhu Yan gasped, scrambling to grab his son back before collapsing in pain. “Don't hurt him! Don't,” he begged, clawing the floor tightly.

Zhuo held his baby by the swaddling cloths and glared at the baby. Zhu Yan glared at him in fear and anger.

“I warned you,” Zhuo hissed. “That I'll get rid of this abomination. You've had your few days to say goodbye.” 

“Leave him alone!” 

“Be quiet!” 

Zhu Yan gasped and felt his voice gone. The alpha command rippled like a layer on top of him. He couldn't scream any words or fight back. Over the months, his body had gotten used to Zhuo's commands.

He could only watched in horror as the tip of Yún Guāng Sword pierced the swaddling cloth. His baby's cries went louder and it broke Zhu Yan's heart at the sight of blood blooming on the cloth. 

“Wretched thing!” Zhuo cursed, throwing the baby up.

He swung his sword up in a high arch motion. The blade neatly decapitating the baby's head from his little body when it descended down.

Zhu Yan's vision tunnelled down to his baby's body falling in front of him. The swaddling cloth was soaked in blood. It landed with a wet splat with blood splattering on the floor. The smaller cloth was caught by Zhuo. 

“Here,” he said with a cruel smile. “Your son.” He tossed the baby’s head and it rolled in front of Zhu Yan. "Someone come and clean this mess up. Lock his room doors and do not let him out from there without my orders," he barked the order before leaving the mess behind him.

Zhu Yan, along with his dead son, was thrown into his room. A lock with gold bindings, chained the room doors and he was sealed in there.

Zhu Yan quickly crawled over to his son on weak arms and legs. Heavy tears streamed down his cheeks. His son's face was etched in a frozen scream and trails of blood tears stained his little cheeks.

Zhu Yan gathered the two wet bundles to his chest. He cried heavily, unable to scream for his grief from the alpha command's hold on him for a few more moments before it broke.

The first loud sob escaped his mouth. He rocked himself along with his son. His little baby boy, barely seen anything but his mother's face had his life taken from him.

His dead son became the first grave he's dug that wasn't in Dà Huāng. It was in the garden of his room. He dug with his hands with tears flowing. The grave was deep despite being cut and the small wounds bled. But the biggest wound was in his heart.

Grief was a familiar friend. It stayed with him, accompanying him as he buried his son’s body and head together. They sat by the grave for many days. 

Eventually he was summoned and Zhu Yan hardly remembered about meeting Zhuo at the courtyard or what was spoken. Everything felt like being underwater. The little things he's heard were tea and heats.

He was thrown back into his room and a cup of tea was shoved into his face. He was forced to drink the tea and he didn't fight back. He learnt it was a suppressant tea to be taken every month. It was Zhuo's way of preventing another incident from happening again.

For years he took the tea and his heat cycle became irregular. He could no longer tell when his heat would come. It drove him slightly mad from guessing. Eventually he gave up.

On a new moon autumn night, he heard whispers from the servants that Madam Zhuo had given birth to a healthy son. An heir was born.

Zhu Yan felt anger swirl in his body. His own son was robbed from life, hardly given a chance to grow and the Zhuo had a newborn human son.

Zhu Yan grew angry at everything. Angry that he was chained to this room and the mortal realm. Angry that he was nothing but a tool for a treaty. Angry at Li Lun for never coming for him. Angry at the Baize Goddess and the whole of Dà Huāng along with everything else in the world. 

Anger birthed malicious and it was a power that fuel him. A blood moon appeared on the night the Zhuo heir turned ten, all the malicious energy of the world came slithering to him. He felt it fill his inner core and his eyes glowed red with power.

Zhu Yan smiled at the gold binds glowing, unable to stop him. Nothing could stop malicious from getting revenge.

He snapped his room's lock easily and walked along the halls of the Zhuo's mansion. Servants ran from him and they dropped dead from a single spell. He hunted for this target and found him whimpering in his room.

Zhuo tried to wield Yún Guāng Sword, swinging it around wildly and used alpha commands to make Zhu Yan obey. It fell on deaf ears.

Zhu Yan grabbed hold of Zhuo’s neck, staring at him with a gleeful look in his eyes. He snapped Zhuo's neck easily with a single move. A cry of “father!” was loud in the room. Zhu Yan turned to see the Zhuo heir huddled with his mother and sister in one corner.

Yún Guāng Sword fell from Zhuo’s slack fingers, clattering to the floor. Tears streamed down their faces and the Zhuo heir glared at him with hatred in his eyes.

Zhu Yan casually tossed the dead man aside and picked Yún Guāng sword up. It glowed brightly in warning before casually tossing the sword in front of them. They flinched from it.

He tilted his head like a curious animal, watching with a dark light in his eyes. “Learn to wield that sword and avenge your father,” Zhu Yan said with a grin. “If it chooses you, then you can have your revenge by killing me." 

He left the Zhuo family alive; needing them to free him but slaughtered whoever crossed his paths. He bathed the hallways with blood flowing like little streams and bodies littered the floor.

When the blood moon ended, Zhu Yan was given twenty lashes in front of the surviving Zhuo family. He didn't care about the heavy glares given to him. Nothing could be felt.

This was his first official punishment from the Zhuo family. The surviving Zhuo son's hatred burned for Zhu Yan but Yún Guāng Sword never chose the boy, remaining dormant in his hands. 

~~~

For generations Zhu Yan watched the Zhuo clan failed to wield the sword. They failed to kill him. He was used as a rut pleasure, taking their hard cocks and making him plump with children. They forced tea into his mouth, causing miscarriages and turning his heat irregular until it stopped completely.

One particular Zhuo generation didn't like his yāo appearance. He picked up a lock of red wine hair, studying it with a disgusted look after fucking Zhu Yan in his pseudo heat.

"I know yāo's have a human form," the Zhuo said, twirling the lock of hair. "Silver suits you better, whore."

Zhu Yan's hair was pulled back, forcing him to tilt his head backwards. A wet tongue licked the column of his throat and a low rumble vibrated from the Zhuo alpha. Zhu Yan knew better than to disobey him, so he changed his appearance to please them. 

Red wine hair turned into silver hair. His red eyes became almond brown and his yāo marks disappeared. His cheek was touched, making him turn his head and a hum of approval was heard.

"If you weren't a yāo, I would have married you in a heartbeat," Zhuo said wetly, rutting his cock against Zhu Yan's thigh. "Beautiful."

They told him he has charmed them with his human appearance, beautiful and alluring like a untouchable pretty maiden. The very same generation glared at his bond mark on his nape. They touched it, making Zhu Yan flinch from their touch and visibly shivered.

They grabbed the back of his neck, forcing him to tilt his head to the side and expose his mating mark. His chest heaved with terrified breaths. He felt their breath ghost over the mark and teeth grazed the flesh. They did the one thing even humans will never do.

They broke his bond. Teeth sunk into his mating mark. Zhu Yan choked on the white hot pain searing him all of a sudden. His soul flickered with another alpha claiming him. It felt like fire was burning his connections with Li Lun away.

Panic filled him and it transferred through the bond—the remaining part of the bond. It continued to burn. It kept crawling, burning until whatever last emotion he felt from Li Lun was gone.

His bond with Li Lun was shattered and it left him spiralling into a deeper sense of grief he's never felt before. Losing his bond and never knowing if Li Lun was alive or dead, was worse.

"There," Zhuo muttered, releasing him and gave the mark a lick. "For each of my family who comes in here will claim you. We will never marry you but claiming you with a mark is something that can be done."

Tears flowed from Zhu Yan's eyes. He lost the only thing he had with Li Lun. The last thing he was holding onto and everything disappeared from this single bite.

For years Zhu Yan longed to be free. He watched the clouds pass by each day with a look that gave up on life. He stopped resisting the Zhuos, letting them do as they wish with him. It became a repeated cycle over the years.

Fuck, pregnancy, miscarriage, and repeat.

One generation had learnt how to create barriers. They erected a barrier in front of his door. The orange golden glow shimmered in front of him like fire light. Inscriptions floated around and the gold bracelets on his arms lit up in tune with the barrier. He tried to touch the barrier but he felt pain instead. It rippled but never allowed him to pass through. 

Some days he would sit by the door, looking at the courtyard where he watched the magnolia tree grow from a sapling to a mature tree. He watched the seasons change and the graves he's dug grew. His hatred grew and some years later it frizzled out to emptiness.

He stopped caring about his life. He stopped caring about being used as a breeding omega and he stopped caring when each Zhuo would spit curses at him, blaming him for being unable to wield Yún Guāng Sword. 

And he grew to hate the sun.

Years blended for him, hardly noticing when the generations had changed. On a winter day, Zhu Yan was summoned to meet the new Zhuo heir. He glanced at the rows of servants coming into his room—the barrier was gone—carrying trays of clothes and hair accessorises.

They dressed him up in brand new clothes with intricate stitches. The clothes were thin and shimmering, hardly blocking the cold, and he narrowed his eyes at the demon hunters standing guard in his room. They eyed him warily and the servant girls smelt of fear. They hurriedly dressed him and did his hair, twisting his silver locks into loops and braids.

Hair beads and hairpins decorated his hair luxuriously. His lips were painted with light red lip tint. A thin face veil draped over his face and the demon hunters brought him to the current Zhuo master. It was the first time he's been out of the room in so many years and Zhu Yan didn't even bother to look up. He stared at his bare feet, finding the floor to be very cold.

A small shuffle caught his attention along with the sweet scent of milk and honey—only young pups were associated with. Zhu Yan lifted his head up to see the young pups. 

A pair of brothers, young and innocent, stared at him with wide eyes. Something about their innocent gaze was different and Zhu Yan blinked at them.

When was the last time he wasn't looked at with hatred in their eyes? When was the last time he wasn't spat or cursed at?

Zhu Yan has forgotten what the feeling was like. It was the first time he's seen nothing but pure curiosity from the Zhuo children. They clung onto their mother's robes, staring at him. Zhu Yan can smell the sickness that clings onto their mother like another scent. She placed her hands on her children's back, comforting them.

Zhu Yan glanced away as it reminded him of his little one. Voices blurred for him but this time was different. He learnt of the two pups names before he was escorted back. He looked at his room doors that was purposely left open but the barrier sat shimmering in front of him.

He was trapped again and Zhu Yan laid in his bed to stare up at the ceiling. The suppressant tea sat waiting on the table, waiting to be taken. He'll take it later he tells himself. There wasn't a point for him to take when his heat was gone and his womb laid dry and empty. He closed his eyes, letting sleep claim him. He dreamt of running freely beside Li Lun at the stone beach of Dà Huāng.

The dream shattered. His eyes snapped open when he felt the bedsheets shift. He whipped his head to the side, finding a small face peering up at him with big grey blue eyes and rosy cheeks. The scent of milk and honey came from the little child, no older than five, and Zhu Yan was puzzled as to how a young child managed to enter his room. 

He slowly sat up, staring down at the little boy dressed in the finest fluffy winter robes he's ever seen. The boy was well loved as it was shown. Zhu Yan tilted his head to one side, letting his hair beads sway from the action.

Neither said anything to each other before the little boy scampered off like a skittish mouse. 

Zhu Yan didn't think much of the boy, recognizing him as the youngest Zhuo heir he just met, Zhuo Yichen. Zhu Yan changed into something better for the winter months. He dons a thick black winter robe with gold stitching embroidered onto the cloth.

It was a mocking gift gifted to him. The previous generations loved to give him beautiful robes to make him wear for entertainment. These robes were never worn outside but he kept it, preserving it with a little magic. The robe was warm and Zhu Yan lit a brazier (he charmed a servant to bring for him) to keep himself warm.

His room was cold and lonely.

Zhu Yan sat by the veranda one day, watching the snow fall when he felt the air shift. Someone has entered his room and he turned his head to find the same boy again. Zhuo Yichen didn't say anything and this time he smelt of herbs and milk.

Zhuo Yichen slowly approached Zhu Yan like a cautious animal.

Zhu Yan stayed still, watching him with a sharp blank gaze until Zhuo Yichen placed something on the floor. It was within an arm’s reach for Zhu Yan and Zhuo Yichen scampered off again.

Zhu Yan found him strange, looking down to find a single pastry wrapped in oiled paper. He blinked with surprised eyes. 

No one has given him pastries since he entered the Zhuo mansion. The pastry skin was a deep golden colour and it smelt of lotus paste and oil. It was fresh and hot when Zhu Yan touched the pastry. He wasn't sure if it was filled with poison or a trick being played on him.

Zhu Yan hesitated, recoiling his hand from the pastry. He left his spot to lie in his bed, leaving the pastry to the cold winter air. The next day when he woke up, finding a few birds pecking at the pastry. They enjoyed eating the little snack.

He watched them and nothing happened to the birds. The finished the pastry, leaving crumbs behind and Zhu Yan watched the birds fly off. 

Maybe he could believe in that little boy. 

Maybe he could believe in the small kindness in this generation. 

~~~

Zhuo Yichen's arrival was unpredictable. Zhu Yan could never guess what day he was coming. Whenever he did, Zhu Yan would stare at him and the little Zhuo would leave little things for Zhu Yan. Trinkets of dried leaves, shiny stones and sometimes food that Zhuo Yichen could sneak in. 

Such a strange boy with his little strange gifts. 

Their interactions were quiet and short, never more than ten minutes a day until one day Zhuo Yichen ran into Zhu Yan's room, hiding from his caretakers. 

“Second young master!” The caretakers’ cried, rushing around the hallways. "Second young master!"

Zhu Yan heard the commotion but he didn't move from his spot by the veranda. One of the caretakers dared to peek into his room but they never stepped through the barrier before shaking their heads in denial. They left, calling for Zhuo Yichen and Zhu Yan waited until he couldn't hear any of them. 

“You can come out now,” Zhu Yan softly said and he watched as Zhuo Yichen, dressed in spring robes, warm and light, in colours of pastel blue and white, crawled out from the side of the bed. 

“Are they gone?” Zhuo Yichen asked, trying to peer over the bed frame. 

“They won't come in here,” Zhu Yan said, curiously watching Zhuo Yichen stand up and brush his robes. “Why are you running from them?” 

Zhuo Yichen wrinkled his little nose and Zhu Yan found it cute for a moment. “They weren't going to let me play with ge.” 

Ge, would mean the eldest Zhuo child and Zhu Yan's next betrothed. Zhuo Yixuan was his name

Zhu Yan hummed in reply, leaning further back against the pillar he was leaning on. 

“And you ran here instead?” He asked and Zhuo Yichen shuffled on the spot like a child being scolded. “Why?” 

“Because pretty gege looked lonely and here feels safe,” Zhuo Yichen answered, stunning Zhu Yan with his answer. “Why are you? Do you want to play outside?” 

Zhu Yan looked away from Zhuo Yichen's curious face. “No, I don't want to play outside,” he lied and Zhuo Yichen stepped closer to sit next to Zhu Yan. 

“Why?” 

“Because I can't leave here.” 

“Are you being punished?” Zhuo Yichen asked innocently but it sent Zhu Yan's instincts snarling and curling pitifully in his chest. “Baba scolds me when I don't listen. I don't like being scolded.” 

Zhu Yan glanced at the little boy. “Oh?” he questioned with a playful tone, masking his pained look. “Did you get scolded today? What did you do to make your father scold you?” 

Zhuo Yichen pouted, drawing invisible circles on the floor with his finger. “That I shouldn't cry. I'm a big boy now and-and-and men shouldn't cry.” 

Zhu Yan's eyes softened. “Just men or alpha men?” 

Zhuo Yichen glanced up with a shy look. “Alpha men,” he answered and Zhu Yan resisted to roll his eyes. Typical. 

“Men are allowed to cry, you know,” Zhu Yan said to him. “Alpha men or omega men or anyone in general. It's okay to cry.” 

“Pretty gege, did you ever cry?” 

“No, because I wasn't allowed to.” Because I would be whipped and fucked even more than I should. 

Zhuo Yichen suddenly crawled closer to Zhu Yan and sat by his side. “Can I stay here?” 

Zhu Yan's lips quirked up in a quiet smile. “You can stay…stay as long as you like, Xiao Zhuo.” 

Zhuo Yichen stayed until it was time for his lunch. The little boy leaned against Zhu Yan's arm. They watched the birds fly into the garden together, chirping away. 

“Didi, where are you?” A voice called for Zhuo Yichen and Zhu Yan figured it was Zhuo Yixuan. “Didi, it's time to eat.”

Zhuo Yichen perked up excitedly. He quickly got up, rushing off to find his brother and Zhu Yan watched him pass through the barrier easily. It made Zhu Yan curious to see. He headed for the barrier, finding nothing has changed on it. He placed his hand, feeling the barrier’s coldness against his palm. 

The gold shimmering inscriptions rippled in front of him and through the ripples he found a pair of grey blue eyes looking at him. Zhuo Yixuan bowed in greeting and it left Zhu Yan hesitating in greeting back. Zhuo Yixuan's attention was stolen by Zhuo Yichen pulling on his hand and the two Zhuo brothers left Frost Pavilion's compound. 

Zhu Yan found his day to be moving faster than it did before. It startled him that he didn't mind Zhuo Yichen's presence or touch. His mind told him because Zhuo Yichen is still a pup who hasn't hurt him at all. Zhu Yan shook his head, sitting back in his spot again and his hand touched the area where Zhuo Yichen sat. 

It was warm with the faintest trace of milk and herbs lingering on the spot. It wasn't unpleasant and Zhu Yan felt it suited the little pup for now. 

“A strange pup you are, Zhuo Yichen.” 

~~~

Over the months and seasons changed, one particular season changed everything in the Zhuo household. Zhu Yan learnt of Madam Zhuo's death. He remembered her as the omega woman who held her sons when they first met. He's seen Madam Zhuo around, sickly and pale. She carried the harsh scent of herbs and blood. Zhu Yan had watched her cough hard into her handkerchief with the thickest scent of blood coming from it. 

The omega woman loved her children dearly but she couldn't live any longer before her illness claimed her life. Human lives were shorter compared to yāos. A pity, he thought. She was a woman who cared for her sons' safety and well-being. She never harmed Zhu Yan either.

If things were different, he wouldn't have mind having tea with her while Zhuo Yichen played around them.

He only knew of her passing was from the white lanterns hanging from the edge of the roof tiles and the broken sobs of Madam Zhuo's attendant. The funeral procession was long and tiring. Grief hung heavily in the air and Zhu Yan wondered how the little pups were holding.

Their well-being isn't his concern. He watched the funeral procession before heading to his bed to lie in. He turned to his side and stared at the garden, watching the little stream flow around it when the barrier rippled with a presence.

He knew who it was. He didn't have to look.

Zhuo Yichen appeared before him, standing in front of his bed. His little cheeks and eyes were red with loud sniffles coming from his red nose. He was dressed in funeral white robes and Zhu Yan's eyes softened for the pup. 

Zhu Yan shifted backwards on his bed to make space. He petted the empty spot and Zhuo Yichen quickly climbed onto the bed without hesitation. He laid as close as possible to Zhu Yan. The omega yāo gently carded through Zhuo Yichen's hair, untangling the little hair bun. He tried his best to comfort the upset pup. 

A sniffle and Zhuo Yichen's eyes shimmered with tears. His grey blue eyes glittered like cool stones. A colour Zhu Yan found to be beautiful.

“No one will hear you or see you cry here. It's okay to cry for your mother,” Zhu Yan said and heavy tears glistened in Zhuo Yichen's eyes. “Cry for her, Xiao Zhuo. She loved you very much.” 

The dam broke from Zhu Yan's words. Zhuo Yichen burst out crying. He pressed his face into Zhu Yan's chest and clung onto the white ape yāo's robes.

“Mama, I want mama,” he cried and Zhu Yan held him close to his chest, whispering comforting words to calm him the distressed pup.

“I want mama,” Zhuo Yichen sobbed. 

“I know,” Zhu Yan whispered. “I know.” He hummed a children's lullaby while rubbing Zhuo Yichen's back.

Zhuo Yichen continued to cry until he fell asleep in Zhu Yan's arms. The omega yāo stroked Zhuo Yichen's head, scenting him with the comforting scent of peaches and apple blossoms. He hummed a soft lullaby, making sure that Zhuo Yichen can feel his presence. Zhu Yan stopped his actions, sensing someone was coming and he pulled himself away from Zhuo Yichen. 

He quietly padded on the wooden floor, keeping his steps light and soft. Zhu Yan used the shadows to hid in the corner of his room when Zhuo Yixuan stepped through the barrier. He looked frazzled and his red rimmed eyes indicated he was crying for his mother too. Zhuo Yixuan found Zhuo Yichen on Zhu Yan's bed and quickly lifted his brother up. The little Zhuo clung onto his brother's shoulders and Zhuo Yixuan left Zhu Yan’s room without a word. 

Zhu Yan stepped out from the shadows. The air was heavy with salt and grieving pups. It was a sad week for the Zhuo children.

Over the week, Zhu Yan could only provide whatever comfort he could give to Zhuo Yichen when the pup has started to make a habit of finding Zhu Yan. Maybe it's the familiarity of an omega scent or it was the motherly moments Zhu Yan would offer for Zhuo Yichen. A pup should never experience the death of a parent and vice versa.

Five years have passed and Zhuo Yichen turned ten. Zhu Yan watched him grow from a little pup to a slightly older pup. Zhu Yan had managed to shoo Zhuo Yichen out from his room when the kitchen door opened. A servant quickly placed the suppressant tea and scurried away.

Zhu Yan smelt the scent of herbs. The brew today was heavier and darker. He knew why. Tonight would be the blood moon and if he wasn't subdued, many lives would be lost. He picked the bowl and quickly downed it. The bitterness of the tea was heavy on his tongue.

He felt the effects take root immediately. His vision started to double and he swayed heavily on the spot. He hurriedly placed the bowl down, stumbling away to find a corner to lean on. He slid down onto the floor, staring blankly up at the evening sky.

It won't be long and when the moon rose, it turned red and Zhu Yan's eyes slipped closed. He felt like he was underwater. Floating and swaying. Hands pulled him up, dragging him somewhere he knew he could easily escaped but the drug was heavy. Despite the malicious energy slithering towards him, he could barely move. Even his finger couldn't twitch.

Zhu Yan was chained in the dungeon, subdued from the drug concoction, to keep him from harming anyone. He was gagged and blindfolded. He sat on the stone slab, still as a statue and would tilt his head minutely whenever he heard the sound muffled shuffling feet.

When the night has passed and the blood moon was gone, they unchained him, dragging him back to his room. They unceremoniously dropped him to the floor, removing the gag and blindfold.

He laid on the cold floor, staring blankly at the ceiling, waiting for the effects of the tea to leave his body. He closed his eyes, deciding that the floor was a better place to lie on. 

“Why are you lying on the floor?” 

Zhu Yan sluggishly opened his eyes. Zhuo Yichen peered down at him from his little squat by Zhu Yan’s head. The omega yāo didn’t want to interact with Zhuo Yichen today, and he sighed softly and wearily. 

“Because I fell,” Zhu Yan lied and Zhuo Yichen hummed, shifting to lie next to Zhu Yan. 

“Then I’ll lie with you, pretty gege.” Zhu Yan slowly turned his head and Zhuo Yichen smiled cutely at him. “But the floor is cold.” 

“It is cold…” Zhu Yan said. He watched Zhuo Yichen sit up to pull Zhu Yan’s blanket down to cover them both. “It’ll get dirty,” he lightly said but had no heart to scold the pup who tucked the blanket around Zhu Yan’s shoulders. 

“Then we’ll wash it later,” Zhuo Yichen answered with a determined look and he laid back down again, snuggling close to Zhu Yan. “Pretty gege, why are you crying? Did you hurt your head?” 

Zhu Yan’s bottom lip quivered. He thinks it’s the drug’s side effect but choose not to answer. He nodded and Zhuo Yichen gently patted Zhu Yan’s head in a comforting manner only a child would copy from the adults.

"It's okay, pretty gege. I'm here," Zhuo Yichen whispered loudly and Zhu Yan nodded in answer.

They laid on the floor together, doing nothing but wait. Zhuo Yichen played with Zhu Yan’s hair, coiling the strands around his fingers and hummed a lullaby in an off tune manner. They waited until the omega yāo could move. 

“You should go, Xiao Zhuo,” Zhu Yan gently nudged Zhuo Yichen’s hand. “Before they find out you snuck out again.” 

Zhuo Yichen wrinkled his nose and pushed himself off. He seemed reluctant to leave but he knew the consequences of being caught.

“Okay,” he whispered and patted Zhu Yan’s cheek in farewell. “Don’t fall off the bed, pretty gege,” he giggled and scampered off before he was found. 

“If only…” Zhu Yan whispered, feeling the small warmth on his cheek fade away. It made him smile softly. “If only it was like that.”

Chapter Text

The afternoon sun hung high up in the sky making the air feel warm. It was a nice day to lie on the grass, basking in the warmth of the sun but for Zhu Yan, it was an annoyance. He retreated further back into his room, deciding today wasn't a good day. Some days he would sit underneath the sun rays and some he would hide in the shadows.

Today was the latter.

He leaned against the cool wall of his room, letting the chill seep into his skin. The darkness's cold feeling was welcoming and foreign at the same time. Cool and black like a certain alpha yāo. It reminded him of Li Lun.

The pagoda tree yāo was cold to touch but strong to hold, always dressed in colours of black and dark brown. A small smile appeared on Zhu Yan's face, reminiscing the feel of Li Lun hugging him tightly around his waist and pressed soft kisses against the side of his neck. 

Zhu Yan sighed softly, feeling Li Lun's ghostly arms around his waist and shoulders. He felt his heart clenched painfully at the feeling. He closed his eyes and hugged his knees tight to his chest, pretending it was Li Lun holding him in hopes of bringing a small comfort.

But it wasn't. His ears picked up the sound of little bells jingling nearby and knew who it was. 

Zhu Yan didn't feel like entertaining Zhuo Yichen today but the little pup was a good distraction for him. Zhuo Yichen probably escaped from his studies again, knowing the little rascal.

The barrier rippled with the pup's presence and Zhu Yan peeked around the wall, finding Zhuo Yichen dressed in the thickest of winter robes. A fluffy white cape was draped over the boy's shoulders, nearly engulfing him.  

Ah, winter is here, Zhu Yan thought, forgetting the season has changed but he hardly felt it. Time in this room was different.

A cold breeze blew in, ruffling his hair and the edges of his clothes. He looked down at his thick silver robes, feeling lost for a moment. He wasn't sure when he changed clothes to suit the cold season but he pushed the thoughts away when Zhuo Yichen called for him. The little pup never knew his name and would call with the little nickname he gave Zhu Yan.

“Pretty gege,” Zhuo Yichen called, heading towards the veranda where Zhu Yan usually sits on. “Pretty gege, where are you?” 

Zhu Yan watched Zhuo Yichen look around the veranda through half lidded eyes. He didn't dare move to avoid giving his presence away. The little pup spun around on the spot, looking for him yet was unable to find him.

Zhuo Yichen stood next to the low table by the veranda. An incense burner sat on the edge, burning with a scent Zhu Yan doesn't know and the smoke tickled Zhuo Yichen's nose. He sneezed once and rubbed his itchy nose. The sight was cute.

An amused thought trickled into Zhu Yan's mind. He decided to play with the pup and see how Zhuo Yichen would react. Zhu Yan quietly pushed himself up, blending in with the shadows. He walked with quiet steps, using the darkness to disguise himself until he stood behind Zhuo Yichen. 

The little pup didn't sense him and Zhu Yan's eyes glowed red. His claws appeared, long and sharp. He wanted to know if Zhuo Yichen would bleed red like his pups.

Would the little pup be afraid of him? Would he cry out at the sight of Zhu Yan's form? The thought of hurting Zhuo Yichen didn't sit right with him but he pushed the thought away. Maybe, just maybe he can let this cold feeling go away, if he ever sets foot out of the room.

“Pretty gege? Where did he go?” Zhuo Yichen mumbled when a shadow loomed above him.

A hand reached out with thick black claws and a pair of glowing red eyes stared down at Zhuo Yichen. 

“Pretty gege,” Zhuo Yichen called again when Zhu Yan's hand landed on his head. 

Zhuo Yichen jumped from the sudden touch and spun around; his face lit up with a wide smile.

“Pretty gege!” He excitedly called and Zhu Yan chuckled lightly—the red glow and his black claws disappeared—but his chuckle never reached his eyes. His gaze was nothing but a blank and dull look.  

“Hello, Xiao Zhuo,” Zhu Yan greeted, ruffling Zhuo Yichen's hair. “You're early today.” He commented, heading for the veranda cushion seat and table. 

His robes of silver white trailed long behind him, like a river sparkling in the moonlight. His silver white hair was loose and wavy today with strings of golden hair beads weaved into his hair. A reminder of Li Lun's golden hair beads.

Zhuo Yichen rounded the table, immediately sitting next to Zhu Yan. A teacup of plain water—a habit Zhu Yan had made to keep a teapot of clean water—was poured for Zhuo Yichen. Zhu Yan rested his chin on his closed palm, watching the little pup drink his water.

“Escaped from your studies again?” He asked with a knowing look. 

“No,” Zhuo Yichen defended himself. “I wanted to see you because ge said I can't stay late today.” 

“Oh? Your brother warned you about staying late?” 

Zhuo Yichen nodded. “He said he'll explain to me when I'm older.” He didn't see the way Zhu Yan’s eyes dimmed in the sunlight and a blank mask slipped on. 

“Your brother is right, Xiao Zhuo,” Zhu Yan said, pouring himself a cup of water. “You better head back early today. It won't be…good if you stay longer.” 

“But why?” Zhuo Yichen argued, pouting like the little child he is.

Zhu Yan chuckled, reaching out to gently poke Zhuo Yichen's cheek, finding it squishy like soft cotton balls. “Little pup, you must listen to the adults.” 

“But ge isn't an adult yet either."

"Then aren't I an adult? You should listen to what I say."

Zhuo Yichen wrinkled his nose. "Pretty gege, are you a yāo?” Zhuo Yichen asked and Zhu Yan pulled his finger away. 

The air around them turned heavy and it rippled with yāo energy. It should have terrified the child, where adults would flinch and run from him. But yet a small child, like Zhuo Yichen couldn't comprehend what was happening.

Zhuo Yichen decided he didn't like the look on Zhu Yan’s face. A face that seemed to darken like the overcast sky and eyes that were devoid of any sparkling light. A smile and laughter suited Zhu Yan better. 

Zhu Yan smiled emptily, having heard Zhuo Yichen's question and he shifted away from the table. “Come here,” he called and Zhuo Yichen, despite the rippling air of tense power, immediately crawled into Zhu Yan’s lap. “If I tell you what I am, would you hate me?” Zhu Yan asked, hugging Zhuo Yichen.

“Depends,” Zhuo Yichen answered, feeling safe and warm in these arms and Zhu Yan huffed an amused laugh. 

“I am a yāo,” Zhu Yan answered, glancing down to find Zhuo Yichen looking up at him with big grey blue eyes. “A powerful yāo.” 

“I know,” Zhuo Yichen said. “You look powerful, I think.” 

“Oh? Yet you still sneak into my room every time? Aren't you afraid, Xiao Zhuo?” 

Zhuo Yichen shook his head, looking down to fiddle with Zhu Yan's fingers. “If you were mean, I wouldn't be here feeling like I can talk to you or how safe it feels. Ge wouldn't let you live either if you were a mean yāo. I'm not scared.” 

Zhu Yan’s eyes softened for the brave pup. He leaned down and rested his chin on top of Zhuo Yichen's small head. “Do you want to hear a story?” 

Zhuo Yichen lit up, sitting up straight before leaning against Zhu Yan’s chest. He made himself comfortable, pulling Zhu Yan's arm to his little chest. He heard Zhu Yan chuckle at his enthusiasm for a story.

Zhu Yan shifted to make them comfortable. The omega yāo leaned back against the veranda's pillar, pulling Zhuo Yichen closer to him.

“What kind of story?” Zhuo Yichen asked eagerly. 

“A story about how two great yāos formed Dà Huāng or do you want a different story?” 

“The great yāos,” Zhuo Yichen said with wide fascinated eyes and the white ape yāo couldn't help but to nuzzle the child in his lap. 

“Dà Huāng is a land, far and wide…” Zhu Yan began his tale and Zhuo Yichen eagerly listened to it. 

~~~

Night has fallen and the lanterns that hung around the edges of the rooftops were lit. The hallways were cast in a soft orange glow. Footsteps, strong and light, walked down those hallways, and his shadow was distorted from the pillars.

Zhuo Yixuan headed to the one place he never liked going into. Ever since he came of age, being fifteen as the elders put it, he was given the heaviest responsibility. He was betrothed to Zhu Yan. Something he never thought would happen.

But the thought of his little brother being betrothed to Zhu Yan didn't sit right with him either. He was the better choice. Zhuo Yixuan stopped in front of Frost Pavilion's bedroom doors. He took a deep breath and pushed it open.

The doors swung quietly and the golden barrier shimmered in front of him. Rows of inscriptions floated around, like talisman paper tied to a rope. Zhuo Yixuan took a deep breath and stepped through. It rippled, recognizing his presence as a Zhuo and allowed him to pass before it stilled.

The room was dark with no candle in sight. Only the moonlight lighting the room up in a silvery light. Zhuo Yixuan felt the chill in the room, realizing how it lived up to its name. There was not a single brazier in sight and he wondered how did Zhu Yan ever stand the cold. He headed deeper into the room, passing through long cloths that draped from the ceiling and rounded a corner where a large bed sat.

The person he was looking for was sitting by the veranda, humming a child’s lullaby quietly. Zhu Yan was leaning against the pillar on one side with a thick blanket covering his lap.

Zhuo Yixuan frowned for a moment but dismissed the pitying thoughts in his head.

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yixuan called softly, heading closer and Zhu Yan turned his head to see him with a pair of glowing red eyes. 

“Young master Zhuo, you're here,” Zhu Yan said quietly. “Are we still proceeding with tonight's endeavours?” 

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yixuan sounded exasperated, like he didn't want to be in here.

Zhu Yan hushed him immediately with a finger to his lips. A silent gesture to be quiet. It stunned Zhuo Yixuan for a moment and confusion filled him.

“You wouldn't want to make a fuss now, do we? We have a little guest in this room,” Zhu Yan whispered. "I would hate it if he woke up." He faced in front again, returning to humming the lullaby loudly.

Zhu Yan resumed his stroking of something in his lap. Zhuo Yixuan feared for a second, that he had came into the room. He quickly went over, stopping in front of Zhu Yan when his gaze landed on the bundle in Zhu Yan's lap. His breath hitched at the sight of his brother, curled up in Zhu Yan's lap. Zhu Yan continued to stroke Zhuo Yichen's hair and the little pup snuggled deeper in his sleep.

“You wouldn't want to wake your brother up, hmm?” Zhu Yan said with a slight threatening tone in his voice. “It would be a pity to wake him up when it's already this late.” 

“What did you do to him?” Zhuo Yixuan hissed with a narrowed gaze.

“Nothing. I only entertained him with stories of old and fed him dinner. Only because he charmed one of the servants to hand him the tray before he came to my room,” Zhu Yan rolled his eyes. “I wouldn't harm a defenceless pup. whether they are a yāo or human, a pup is still a pup."

Zhuo Yixuan clenched his hands tightly. He always had a feeling that Zhuo Yichen had found Zhu Yan. He remembered entering Zhu Yan's room when they were younger, searching for Zhuo Yichen after their mother's death and found him curled up in Zhu Yan's bed. He never thought much about it, only cared for the well-being of his brother.

"You should take him back to his room," Zhu Yan said quietly, breaking Zhuo Yixuan's thoughts.

Zhuo Yixuan immediately picked Zhuo Yichen up. The sudden shift of position caused Zhuo Yichen to whine softly. Zhuo Yixuan coaxed Zhuo Yichen back to sleep by muttering soft words and his little brother nuzzled into his neck. Slow, quiet even breaths ghosted over Zhuo Yixuan's neck and the older Zhuo immediately left the room.

"Young Master Zhuo," Zhu Yan called, halting him in his steps. “Don't worry, I didn't harm him at all. I don't see a point in harming your brother.”

Zhuo Yixuan left the room with Zhuo Yichen in his arms. He feared Zhu Yan had done something than just entertaining his brother. He stopped in his tracks when Zhuo Yichen sank further into his hold.

He hefted Zhuo Yichen further in his grip, huffing at his brother's heavy weight and soft scent. He detected another scent that laid on top of Zhuo Yichen's soft milky and honey scent.

Peaches and apple blossoms.

Zhu Yan's scent was laid over, barely noticeable unless he pressed his nose close to Zhuo Yichen's hair. Zhuo Yixuan didn't want to think any further, remembering Zhu Yan's words. He resumed his journey to his brother's room and gently pushed the room doors open. It creaked silently with a few candles lit. He headed straight for the bed, laying Zhuo Yichen down and tucked his brother in.

Zhuo Yixuan brushed Zhuo Yichen's forehead in a soft and gentle touch before checking for any yāo energy with a low spell. He found nothing abnormal. He sighed reassuringly and quickly left to head back to Zhu Yan. 

Zhuo Yixuan didn't want to enter but he needed to fulfil the duty tonight. He didn't have much choice when the elders made sure he was thoroughly briefed on what to do for each month.

By the time he reached Zhu Yan's room, the omega yāo had moved to his bed, waiting patiently with his outer robe draped over his shoulders.

The silver outer robe was stunning if the situation was different. Zhuo Yixuan carefully headed in with measured steps and Zhu Yan glanced over his shoulder to face Zhuo Yixuan with a smile that barely reached his eyes. A smile that was devoid of anything but a practised mask. It made something in Zhuo Yixuan curdled that no human or yāo should look like that.

“Did he wake when you carried him?” Zhu Yan asked casually, watching Zhuo Yixuan with a devoid gaze.

“Why was he in here?” Zhuo Yixuan stressed out and Zhu Yan shrugged. “Did you lure him?” 

Zhu Yan raised an eyebrow, almost scoffing at the thought. “Why would I lure him? He found this place without me needing to prompt him,” he said, leaning back onto his hands and crossing his legs when Zhuo Yixuan realized Zhu Yan was naked. He spied milky white skin on display in a way to entice him. “I’m rather interested in what we are going to do tonight, pup," Zhu Yan purred.

Zhuo Yixuan shivered from the tone.

Zhu Yan grinned seductively, pushing himself up and slowly allowed his outer robe to fall away, revealing his naked body. A body that was fit for an omega yāo. Slender hips that fit perfectly in an alpha's hands and an awaiting womb, ready to be filled and grow a pup in.

Zhuo Yixuan looked away, unable to stand the indecency when fingers grasped his chin, forcing him to look back. Zhu Yan's grin widened.

“You're here. Why not enjoy what is given to you.” Zhu Yan leaned in close to nuzzle Zhuo Yixuan's ear. He blew hot air against the shell, earning a twitch from the teenager. "Like every alpha in your family did."

Zhuo Yixuan closed eyes. The reason he was in Zhu Yan's room was because the elders thought it would be faster if he presented with a omega in heat. Something about triggering an alpha's rut with the sweet heat scent of an omega. But Zhuo Yixuan disliked this hidden custom and Zhu Yan seemed to not care about it.

Not only was he sure he'll present as an alpha too.

Zhuo Yixuan silently counted in his head before pushing Zhu Yan away. He pulled his outer robe off and quickly draped it over Zhu Yan's shoulders. He secured the robe with quick fingers, glancing up to see Zhu Yan's eyes softening for him. 

“Young Master Zhuo,” Zhu Yan said, reaching out to cup Zhuo Yixuan's cheek. “This wouldn't help me soon.” 

Zhuo Yixuan detected the faint scent of herbs on Zhu Yan's fingers. He glanced over his shoulder where an empty teacup sat. He knew what it was.

Heat inducing tea, and it was obvious that Zhu Yan had drunk it. Why would Zhu Yan even drink that tea? Zhuo Yixuan looked back, unable to stop his glare at the floor.

"I can't help you…" Zhuo Yixuan said and Zhu Yan pushed him back a few steps.  

“My heat will start any minute now,” Zhu Yan said and Zhuo Yixuan can see sweat beading on Zhu Yan's forehead, and a red flush creeping to his cheeks. "You should leave."

"The elders will know like last time," Zhuo Yixuan said, remembering when he was thirteen and fled the first time Zhu Yan went into heat after drinking the heat inducing tea. He was scolded by the elders and Zhuo Yixuan learnt to just sit in the room and wait.

Zhu Yan sighed softly. "Stupid alphas," he cursed softly. "Forcing a teen pup to present."

Zhuo Yixuan's lips quirked slightly at the protective tone in Zhu Yan's voice. He doubted the omega knew what he was saying but he can smell the slow thickening of Zhu Yan's omega scent: peaches and apple blossoms. It has become a scent that he grew to like ever since he sat through Zhu Yan's heat. Zhu Yan sat back down again and leaned a leg away from Zhuo Yixuan.

“Then we'll keep doing as we have always have, Xiao Xuan,” Zhu Yan said, purposely lifting his leg to caress Zhou Yixuan's chin with his toes, forcing him to look at him. "Just watch."

Zhu Yan's sweet heat scent thickened further until Zhuo Yixuan could taste it on his tongue. Peaches and apple blossoms were thick and heady. Despite not presenting yet, Zhuo Yixuan realized how thick Zhu Yan's scent was, almost like he was forced to produced a thick scent to entice alphas. It felt like a sick and cruel way of forcing an alpha and omega together.

He couldn't take his eyes off from the red blush darkening on Zhu Yan's cheeks. It made the omega yāo look beautiful. Like red apples on a winter floor. Zhuo Yixuan leaned back when Zhu Yan surged up, pushing him down to press feather light kisses on his cheeks and neck.

The faint touch of Zhu Yan's lips on his skin made him shudder. Zhuo Yixuan was young and he was not immune to his own body responses of what pleasures are.

Zhu Yan pulled Zhuo Yixuan's robe collar open. Sharp teeth nipped against his skin with a hand slipping through the gap in Zhuo Yixuan's clothes. He flinched from the touch, pulling Zhu Yan's hand out before pushing the omega yāo down. Zhu Yan's robes parted open, leaving nothing to be covered.

The light laugh escaped from Zhu Yan's parted lips, briefly reminded Zhuo Yixuan of his brother's hair bells. He shook the thought away and glanced down to see Zhu Yan tilting his head back, exposing his marked neck where a mating bite sat. 

Zhuo Yixuan wondered why Zhu Yan, a mated omega, was in his family's clutches but he never voiced the thought.

Zhu Yan shifted beneath him. He couldn't help but to trailed his gaze down from Zhu Yan's face, over to his neck and down his chest where dusky nipples stood erect. He continued looking until Zhu Yan parted his legs open, showing him the hidden treasure. Such an obscene display of making an alpha go mad with lust but Zhuo Yixuan was neither of that.

He knew Zhu Yan was toying with him. The omega yāo was looking for a reason and a way to trigger Zhuo Yixuan's presentation but nothing happened despite his very thick heat scent. Zhuo Yixuan saw Zhu Yan's hard cock, standing proudly with precum dripping along with his cunt, oozing with slick. 

Zhu Yan purposely moaned loudly when he trailed his own hand over hard nipples and sculpted abdomen. He scratched his fingernails lightly on his skin, making his cock twitched.

Zhuo Yixuan watched the omega yāo grasped for his hard cock. Slender fingers stroked the length of his cock, coaxing it to be harder.

Precum spilled from the tip and Zhu Yan smeared precum over his fingers before slipping his wet fingers into his slick cunt. His fingers sank in easily, earning a loud pleasured moan. He spread his legs open wider, showing how wet he was.

A display to fool both himself and the Zhuo elders.

The ease of his fingers sliding in and out of his own wet cunt made the tip of Zhuo Yixuan's ears burn red. No matter how many times Zhu Yan does this, fucking himself with his own fingers, it never ceased to make Zhuo Yixuan embarrassed. He could never take his eyes off from Zhu Yan's ministrations. It felt like a indecent show to witness but he continued to watch.

Zhu Yan’s thrusting fingers made loud slick sounds. It combined with the omega yāo's pleas of “faster. Ah, ah ah!” in a strange synchronized music. Almond shaped eyes slipped closed, tilting his head back further with every finger thrusting he gave himself. Moans of pleasure made Zhuo Yixuan listen. Zhu Yan stroked his cock at the same time, hoping to reach his peak soon. His silver hair spilled around him in a silver halo like glow.

Beautiful and erotic.

Zhu Yan thought of hands, large and warm, stroking his cock. Black hair that spilled over a pale strong back would mix together with Zhu Yan's own silver hair. Willow shaped eyes that darkened with lust, enjoying the view of Zhu Yan reaching his peak soon. Fingers would pull Zhu Yan's fingers out and replaced with a hard dripping thick cock instead. The thickness alone would fill him in all of the right edges.

It made Zhu Yan whimper with pleasure. He fucked himself hard, bringing himself to a closer edge. Zhu Yan thrusted his hips up, letting his imagination continue. He ignored Zhuo Yixuan in his bed. It seemed unfair to an outsider but Zhu Yan could never let an unpresented pup help him through his heat.

He curled his fingers upwards, pressing his sweet spot that he knew would bring him to a faster end. He stopped thrusting his fingers and tapped hard against his G-spot. He nearly cried out loudly when a burst of hot pleasure shook through his limbs.

Zhuo Yixuan clenched his hands into a tight fist against his dishevelled robes. He never once touched Zhu Yan when the omega yāo was in heat. He knew the next words that would fall from those peach coloured lips. A name that isn't his. 

A name that Zhuo Yixuan has been secretly searching for in Dà Huāng since the first time he heard it. 

“Li Lun,” Zhu Yan breathlessly gasped out. He thrusted his fingers hard and fast. It echoed together with the slick sounds of squelching in the room. “Li Lun, please. Please.” He begged loudly.

Zhuo Yixuan grimaced when Zhu Yan's cries became faster, louder and needier. The red flush had grew from Zhu Yan's cheeks to his shoulders. It painted a pretty picture. Such a needy omega seeking for a faster end.

Zhuo Yixuan's cheeks pinked when Zhu Yan cried out with an orgasm reaching. Slick gushed out from Zhu Yan's cunt, drenching his fingers with it. His cock twitched with spurts of white cum splattering against his abdomen.  

Zhu Yan panted softly, stroking his cock to milk himself as much as he could. A few more spurts of cum weakly shot from the tip before he released his cock and pulled his fingers out.

He breathed hard, letting his hand drop to his side. His chest heaved with air, greedily sucking in as he slowly came down from his high and the heat simmered to a low warmth in his abdomen. He opened his eyes to blankly stare up at the wooden ceiling. His cunt clenched emptily in the cold air, reminding him of the emptiness he's missing.

A rustling of clothes alerted Zhu Yan of his audience. Zhuo Yixuan carefully rearranged his front robes, shifting away from Zhu Yan.

Zhu Yan chuckled bitterly. He shifted to watch Zhuo Yixuan move again, pressing his thighs together and Zhu Yan eyed the tent of his pants.  

“Young Master Zhuo,” Zhu Yan called, tilting his head to the side. “Did you enjoy that? Your body is very honest." He playfully teased Zhuo Yixuan but there was no playful tone in his voice.

Zhuo Yixuan avoided his gaze by staring out at the dark garden, choosing to stay quiet. He recite a mantra in his head, hoping to calm himself. He avoided answering Zhu Yan, knowing that he'll be asked or teased to answer. A foot caressed the underside of his chin, forcing him to face Zhu Yan.

A hooded gaze was given and Zhuo Yixuan swallowed hard. His throat bobbed at the sight of white cum splattered on Zhu Yan's abdomen. His perky hard nipples stood out in display and a wet cunt clenching openly for him to see.

Somewhere along the process, Zhu Yan's robes had fallen open, displaying the omega in a seductive manner.

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes tracked a glob of slick oozing out from Zhu Yan's exposed and stretched cunt. Another pull of Zhu Yan's foot to his chin made him glance up to meet an amused gaze.

Zhu Yan released Zhuo Yixuan's chin to trail his foot down Zhuo Yixuan's chest before pressing on the bulge of his pants. His toes curled around the outline of Zhuo Yixuan's cock, kneading it to coax him for some hardened pleasure.

Zhuo Yixuan caught Zhu Yan's foot and lifted it up from his pants. Zhu Yan chuckled amusedly, wiggling his toes to try and bully Zhuo Yixuan but his foot was gently lowered down to the bed. He stopped wiggling his toes, studying Zhuo Yixuan before pushing himself up.

Zhuo Yixuan startled like a twitching animal and Zhu Yan pushed him down. The teenager sucked in a quiet breath when Zhu Yan climbed onto his lap.

Zhuo Yixuan shuddered at the feeling of his hard cock rubbing against Zhu Yan's still sensitive wet cunt. 

"I can help you," Zhu Yan grinned, deciding on riling Zhuo Yixuan up. "Let me ride you. Give you the release that you want," he said, rocking his hips and moaned at the sparks of pleasure. "Don't you want it, Young Master Zhuo?"

His hips were grasped, halting his movements. Zhu Yan studied Zhuo Yixuan from his spot and the teenager sighed softly.

"I know what you are doing. You're trying to rile me up so I would…" he grimaced at the unfinished sentence but shook his head. "My answer is no and I haven't presented. It isn't right…None of this is right."

Zhu Yan searched Zhuo Yixuan's face and he carefully moved off from his lap. They sat next to each other with their knees touching one another. The quietness between them grew, turning from awkward to a polite silence.

Zhu Yan stared out at the night sky where the moon sat high and Zhuo Yixuan stared at the garden, waiting for his hard cock to soften. 

“You're different,” Zhu Yan started to say, never taking his eyes off from the night sky. “So different from your ancestors and everyone else.” 

“It's…” Zhuo Yixuan said and he felt Zhu Yan turned his gaze onto him, waiting for him to continue. “This isn't right.” 

Zhu Yan huffed an amused laugh. “It was never right to begin with.” 

"Did they make you do this before? Forcing a presentation?"

Zhu Yan shrugged. "Can't remember but yes. I've lost count of the number of teens like you I had to force them to present early. Idiots, your ancestors are."

"But yet you still do it."

"Zhuo Yixuan, Zhuo Yixuan," Zhu Yan said with a tilt of his head. "Unlike you who can get an easy punishment, mine would be different." His gaze turned dark, remembering the feeling of being held down as he was whipped in punishment. He shook his head at the memory. "Maybe you might be the one who would marry me," he joked.

“I'm not the one you want to be with.” 

“Oh? What makes you say that? I've been chained to your family for years, Zhuo Yixuan,” Zhu Yan said, lifting his arms up.

Zhuo Yixuan saw trails of thin gold binding on Zhu Yan's skin. It was bright and stark in the night but it also felt like a leash.

“I can never run from your family. I can never return to where I'm from.” 

“I'm sorry,” Zhuo Yixuan apologized. Zhu Yan gently poked his cheek like he did with Zhuo Yichen. "I'm sorry for what happened in the past."

“You weren't the one who chained me or caged me,” Zhu Yan stated. “But you are the first to deny fucking me for this forced presentation.” 

“If I knew how to break the chains, I would have done so when I first entered this room to meet with you but I never knew how.” 

“Why would you want to break these chains? Do you really want to set me free, Zhuo Yixuan? I'm a yāo and like everyone of you that thinks the same, a yāo is the same as every other yāo.” 

“You're…” 

“Or you could just end me." Zhu Yan grinned bitterly. “Slit my throat and stab me in the heart. Go deeper and you'll hit my inner core. You can destroy that and set me free that way.” 

“You know I can't,” Zhuo Yixuan immediately answered. “I can't end your life or destroy your inner core. Not when—"

“Yún Guāng Sword didn't choose you.” Zhu Yan pulled away, choosing to lay back down. “The heat hasn't worn off yet. It's going to start again soon. You can leave now, Young Master Zhuo. I can take care of this myself.” 

Zhuo Yixuan saw Zhu Yan's cock hardening again and his cunt clenched emptily. A soft sigh as Zhu Yan move to spread his legs open. He reached to grab his cock again but Zhuo Yixuan caught his hand without thinking. It shocked the two of them before Zhu Yan glanced at Zhuo Yixuan. He studied the teenager.

“There are other ways of helping me besides fucking me. I can teach you how to pleasure me," Zhu Yan whispered softly, pushing himself up to lean closer to Zhuo Yixuan.

Zhuo Yixuan blushed hard and Zhu Yan grinned at him. He moved fluidly like water flowing. His silver hair trailed behind him, spilling over the edge of the bed like little silver waterfalls.

"Would you want to learn?" Zhu Yan purred. "How to pleasure an omega. It can be useful for you."

Zhuo Yixuan shook his head and Zhu Yan chuckled lightly at him. Zhu Yan grabbed hold of Zhuo Yixuan's arm and tug him down as they both fell back on the bed. The young alpha landed on top of Zhu Yan's body. Their cocks brushed against each other when Zhuo Yixuan shifted, causing both of them to moan. 

Zhuo Yixuan quickly slapped a hand over his mouth. Embarrassment grew on his face and Zhu Yan cooed at how adorable he is. Another tug and Zhuo Yixuan was guided up to hover above Zhu Yan, avoiding their cocks from touching each other.

It didn't take long for Zhu Yan's eyes to glaze over with heat. The red flush had returned and the sweet scent of peaches and apple blossoms thickened. Zhuo Yixuan looked away but Zhu Yan grasped the bottom of his chin, making him look down.

“Kiss me," Zhu Yan whispered.

Zhu Yan felt Zhuo Yixuan's lips claimed his in a virgin kiss. So sweet and clumsy but it was something new for Zhu Yan too. It was the first of their intimate moment and Zhu Yan's numb instincts reached up before retreating back.

Ah…maybe this would be different, Zhu Yan thought and closed his eyes to pull Zhuo Yixuan down further, guiding him in how to deepen the kiss.

~~~

A few days since their kiss and his heat ended, Zhu Yan heard loud commotion outside his room. He didn't want to be curious till he heard the name of Zhuo Yixuan being muttered. Curiosity won over.

Zhu Yan headed for his door, letting a small flow of yāo energy to push the door open. He peeked through the gap and witnessed servants rushing back and forth with chunks of ice and water.

"The young master presented today," one of the servants whispered and Zhu Yan heard her clearly.

"I heard he presented as an alpha," another said.

"The elders are happy about it. Do you think he'll…" she said and Zhu Yan knew what she meant by her silent question.

Claim him as his new omega and carry a heir. He purposely made the door swing wider, startling the servants when they turned. He bared his fangs and curled his fingers into fake claws. They flinched at the action before scurrying away like scared mice.

He hummed to himself when he was alone. So Zhuo Yixuan presented as an alpha. He figured the young teen—a man—would carry the alpha genes. He never told Zhuo Yixuan that he had smelt the slight change in his scent that night, where cedar wood and sandalwood was starting to bloom.

Woody and musky, like what an alpha is.

He sighed softly. Over the years, he's had alphas and omegas in the Zhuo family but mainly alphas. The few that were born as omegas were more fascinated with him, asking him questions and techniques to please an alpha.

Those years when a Zhuo was born as an omega, Zhu Yan found it pleasant but as soon as they were mated with an alpha, he was forgotten again. A cycle he can never break free.

He almost flicked his fingers to close the door when he spotted Zhuo Yichen wandering the halls aimlessly. It seemed like the little Zhuo was shooed away from his brother's room. The little pup looked close to tears. He continued to wander before turning down the familiar path that heads to Zhu Yan's room.

Zhu Yan left the doors open for him, moving to sit on his bed. He felt the air ripple and a loud sniffle before he met with big watery grey blue eyes staring up at him.

"Pretty gege," Zhuo Yichen whined softly.

Without needing any words, Zhu Yan patted the bed. Zhuo Yichen quickly hauled himself up and plastered himself to Zhu Yan's side. Small fingers clutched onto his robes and Zhu Yan wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

"What's wrong?" Zhu Yan asked, sensing the little pup's need for comfort. "Why are you crying?"

Zhuo Yichen sniffled again. "Ge looked to be in pain," he said, burying his face deeper into Zhu Yan's side. "And they won't let me see him."

Zhu Yan hummed, running a comforting hand through Zhuo Yichen's hair. "Do you know why they won't let you see him?"

"Something about presenting. Ge smelt different too."

"What do you know of presentation of secondary genders?" Zhu Yan asked him, pulling them down till they laid in his bed.

Zhuo Yichen frowned cutely. "There's alphas and omegas, and–and–and betas." Zhu Yan offered him a small smile, nodding to encourage him. "That we have different scents. Pretty gege, what is yours? You always smell sweet like flowers and fruits."

"Omega," Zhu Yan answered and he grinned but his grin was less happy and encouraging. "An omega that is meant to have pups like you."

Zhuo Yichen looked up at him quizzically and took it as an answer. He wiggled until he faced Zhu Yan and played with the edge of Zhu Yan's robes. He seemed to be in thought and Zhu Yan poked his little cheek.

"What are you thinking?" He asked and Zhuo Yichen wrinkled his nose.

"I don't like this presentation," Zhuo Yichen said and Zhu Yan nearly laughed at him. "It seemed to make people sad or happy. I don't understand."

"You don't have to," Zhu Yan answered him, tucking a lock of hair behind Zhuo Yichen's ear. "Just take it as it is. When you're older and have presented, you'll understand one day."

"Do you think I will be an omega?"

"Is it that bad to be an omega?"

"Pretty gege doesn't seem to be happy being an omega." Zhuo Yichen's words pierced Zhu Yan's heart.

The little pup wasn't wrong nor was he being mean. Children are honest in their opinions, never knowing how to filter their words.

Zhu Yan swallowed once, offering a small smile. "Am I?" he teased and Zhuo Yichen couldn't answer him. "Like I said, when you are older, you'll understand one day."

Zhuo Yichen nodded, deciding to shuffle closer and press his face deeper till he could only smell Zhu Yan's scent and nothing else. The warmth, the sweet soft scent and the comfort the older omega was giving him, slowly but surely lulled him to sleep.

His brother's presentation was pushed to the back of his mind. He only woke up when Zhu Yan shook him awake and the day was falling into evening. The youngest Zhuo slipped off from the bed, stopping once to hug Zhu Yan before scampering off and away from the cold room.

~~~

Zhu Yan leaned against the veranda’s railings with his legs pulled up to his chest. The sun was high and warm today. The cool breeze from the mountains felt good and it was one of the rare days he decided to bask in the sun's warmth. He watched the leaves on the tree sway in the wind. His hair was tied into a braided ponytail and the blue silver robes he wore flared out behind him like a peacock’s open tail. 

He continued to watch the leaves sway and the scent of flowers and earth brought a fond memory to him. Days like these, Li Lun would be found basking in the sun, like the very tree yāo he is.

Zhu Yan used to tease him but he would sit next to him or even leaned against Li Lun's arms. Ghostly arms wrapped around him in a tight hug bringing in the faintest scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth to Zhu Yan's nose. It made his eyes watered with fresh tears at the alpha scent.

Tears he didn't know he could still shed and Zhu Yan smiled a small smile at the memory. He closed his eyes to see it play in his mind. Willow shaped eyes that would glare at anything but would soften for him. Fingers gently traced Zhu Yan’s cheeks and markings. His face would be tilted up and Li Lun claimed his lips in a deep kiss that made him breathless. 

“Li Lun,” Zhu Yan mumbled and Li Lun grinned knowingly at him.

Zhu Yan would lean into Li Lun's touch, nuzzling his palm. It warmed his heart at the softness given to him. Softness was something Zhu Yan has come to miss. It was a gentle part that shaped his heart, given to him from his alpha. The gentle touch to his marked scent gland on his neck made him shiver.

The only alpha that he loved and the only one whose seed took root in Zhu Yan's womb.

A little seedling grew. 

Zhu Yan rested a hand on his flat abdomen where he carried his first pup. His first born. He stroked his abdomen with a touch that used to caress the swell of his abdomen growing with each week till he gave birth to their little plant. 

A little blossom with Zhu Yan's cheeky grin and Li Lun’s willow shaped eyes. His little blossom that would get into mischief, chasing after butterflies with giggles. She would get her way by fake crying and everyone who has met her, would spoil her rotten. She would beg her father to carry her and Li Lun would do anything for his little blossom. 

Anything. 

Li Lun turned the whole world into chaos, unbalancing it for what they have done to their little blossom.

Zhu Yan still remembered how he had found her. He searched desperately for her when she didn't return home. He trudged through ponds and mud, calling for her while Li Lun would look for her deep in the thick forest before returning empty handed.

Zhu Yan's clothes was rumpled, stained with mud splatters and the edge of his robes was soaked with water. It dragged through the dirt as he shuffled along. His hair was loose from its half bun. His hairpin nearly falling out from his hair and strands of hair stuck to his face.

He looked dishevelled and stressed.

He turned on the spot, calling her name when he spotted something laying by the edge of the stream. A small circle of lesser yāos had gathered, looking nervous and skittish. They glanced over their shoulders, scenting his presence before they scrambled. They ran away but Zhu Yan's eyes were glued to the still body on the river stone floor.

Zhu Yan stumbled his way over. His heart wouldn't stop beating hard till he stopped in front of the body. His eyes were wide as he stared down at his little blossom's cold body.

She laid by the river with cloudy eyes—once filled with life—staring up at the greying sky. Zhu Yan knelt by her lifeless body; an arrow protruding out of her chest. Her skin was grey and blackened around the edges. Her mouth was opened and Zhu Yan saw her swollen tongue, blocking her throat.

"Bǎobè," he softly called out to her. "Mama is here."

He fell to his knees, ignoring the river water soaking his clothes. "Bǎobè, mama is here," he whispered again before he screamed in agony. 

Li Lun appeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves. He had heard and felt Zhu Yan's pain through the bond. He twirled around to find Zhu Yan kneeling on the river edge, holding onto their little blossom's lifeless body. It froze him on the spot. Their little girl with her cheeky grin, laid in a cold heap in her mother's arms.

Zhu Yan screamed at the whole world for taking his little flower away. He screamed in anger, agony and grief for her life was stolen before she turned fifty or an equivalent to a human child years, a five-year-old.

Her little body started to break into little golden and red dusts, returning back to the earth as they believed.

Zhu Yan desperately tried to hold onto her disappearing body. He begged wetly at the world to give her back to him. To at least let him see her cheeky smile and wide sparkling eyes lit with happiness and love for her parents, once again.

But the heavens never listened and Li Lun, his alpha, his mate, had set the world on fire. 

Li Lun descended onto the human realm in a storm of pagoda leaves. Black as the shadows and looming like the twisted trees in the night forest. Li Lun was unforgiving. His roots grew and slithered on the dirt floor, searching for the one who shot their daughter.

Humans—innocent and not—were killed as he searched for the demon hunting group that stole their daughter's life from them. He killed men who fought him, snapping their necks with his roots and vines.

Blood was shed and Zhu Yan watched it all happen with a blank gaze. He should have stopped his alpha. He should have stopped Li Lun for seeking revenge but Zhu Yan let him. He did nothing but absorb the continuous flow of malicious energy until he was full and satisfied. 

He followed Li Lun in the search. He slaughtered any human that has killed yāos and others. He killed those he thought were wrong, yāos included and he didn't care. 

He didn't care when a human struggled against his grip. He didn't care when he killed a young yāo, accidentally crossing in his path before getting killed.

He didn't care at all when his heart was broken. 

He didn't care when all the warmth he felt was gone, turning his veins and feelings into ice, and allowing the cold to flow through his veins. 

His omega instincts screamed at him for the pup he had lost, and his mind twisted itself, telling him how he couldn't protect his own pup. One night, his mind tortured himself with whispers of failure and hurt.

He couldn't save his only pup. He couldn't protect her at all.

He lost her when she went playing outside.

He left her alone when she needed him the most.

He failed her.

He failed his mate.

He failed as her mother.

He clawed his own arms, shaking his head and screamed at himself for not doing enough. He screamed at his reflection in the bronze mirror before throwing it against the wall. The mirror shattered, lying in broken pieces and he saw himself twisted in many of the reflection.

He dug his claws into his arms, dragging it down the length of it. He tore his skin, letting the malicious energy twist and sew like stitches that held his wounds. It breathed life into him, taking a form that was too great and uncontrollable. It birthed a new side of him that wanted blood and turned the whole world into his own desired playground with a twisted bloody smile. 

Then the blood moon happened.

More bloodshed spilled on the earth, bathing the land in red. The soil drank the blood, human or yāo, as if nourishing the life for it. Zhu Yan stood at the top, laughing hysterically at the destruction. The malicious energy twisted him even more. His yāo markings grew and spread all over him.

It clouded his vision with hatred and revenge.

Li Lun, his beloved, could only stay away from him after being injured. He waited until the blood moon had ended. The alpha watched the world unfold before him. Screams and cries of pleas to stop went unheard and he turned to his mate that he doesn't recognize anymore. His mate had allowed madness to seep in.

Malicious energy rejoiced in Zhu Yan until the world felt right. Zhu Yan stood, wearing a layer of red, as he licked his lips before the red haze covering his vision disappeared. The moon turned silver and the hissing of hatred and revenge disappeared for the night.

Zhu Yan swayed hard on the spot, feeling sick and tired. He collapsed into Li Lun's arms and curled into his mate's chest. The scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth brought tears to his eyes.

Their life has changed since then.

They met the Baize Goddess—who wasn't Zhao Wan'er—who heard of the killings. She found them huddled together beneath a pagoda tree with blood staining their robes and skin. She heard of the death of their daughter and the blood moon. She had a look of pity in her eyes.

Zhu Yan hated that look. He wanted to rip her eyes out. He wanted to hear her scream in pain and Li Lun's hand gripped his arm tightly, shaking him to stay grounded. He was slipping into the coiling feeling of anger and hatred again.

They caused the world to be in chaos. They've caused the humans to suffer and in return the Baize Goddess chose a route no one expected. 

Li Lun was taken away from him, chained somewhere in Dà Huāng, probably locked in his birthplace.

Zhu Yan's life changed. Imprisoned as a bride for the Zhuo clan. Graves he's dug in the garden for the pups he's lost throughout the years. Pups he's birthed in many disfigurement forms from different stages.

Too many. 

Zhu Yan never saw freedom. 

Zhu Yan never saw Dà Huāng. 

Zhu Yan—

“Pretty gege?”

Zhu Yan's eyes snapped open. His eyes darted to the side to see Zhuo Yichen standing next to him with a small tilt of his head. Zhu Yan sniffled once, quickly blinking his eyes to get rid of the tears until a small hand touched his cheek, wiping the drying tear tracks.

“Why are you crying?” Zhuo Yichen asked and Zhu Yan huffed wetly. “Are you in pain? Does it hurt anywhere?”

Oh such sweet and kind words.

Zhu Yan's bottom lip wobbled and he bit his bottom lip to stop himself from crying in front of Zhuo Yichen. Of all the men in the Zhuo clan, he's never met someone like Zhuo Yixuan and Zhuo Yichen. Their father has never laid a hand on Zhu Yan nor has he even met the man. Zhu Yan thinks they've inherited their parents' small kindness. 

“Pretty gege, don't cry,” Zhuo Yichen tried to wipe Zhu Yan's tears. “Don't cry…” he sniffled, tearing up as well and Zhu Yan chuckled wetly. 

He pulled Zhuo Yichen into a soft hug and the little pup melted into his embrace. Zhu Yan wondered if his little blossom would get along with Zhuo Yichen if they ever met. If things were different. He closed his eyes, pushing the memory of his mate and dead daughter away. 

They stayed together in a hug. The floor grew uncomfortable and Zhu Yan picked Zhuo Yichen up carefully. He brought the ten-year-old to his bed, setting the pup down and Zhu Yan laid on his side. Zhuo Yichen followed suit, laying his head on Zhu Yan's pillow and grinned in greeting. 

“Did you run from your studies again?” Zhu Yan asked, stroking Zhuo Yichen's chubby cheek. 

“No. I don't have lessons today,” Zhuo Yichen chirped happily, grabbing Zhu Yan's hand and holding it tightly. 

He shuffled forward, pressing his hand onto Zhu Yan's chest, making a throwing gesture. He did it a few more times while Zhu Yan looked fond. 

“What are you doing?” Zhu Yan asked amusedly. “Are you trying to steal my heart?”

“I'm throwing the pain away,” Zhuo Yichen answered and Zhu Yan's smile froze. “Pain, pain go away,” he said, repeating the gesture and mumbling the lines over and over again. “Does it still hurt?” 

He peered up at Zhu Yan with expecting eyes and the white ape yāo's eyes softened. Zhu Yan nodded, pulling Zhuo Yichen close to his chest. He tucked the little pup in, making sure he was comfortable and felt the pup snuggled in his hold.

“It doesn't hurt,” Zhu Yan said, stroking Zhuo Yichen's fringe. “What do you want to do today?” 

Zhuo Yichen thought for a moment, leaning closer to Zhu Yan's chest. “Can we stay like this?” 

“I don't mind. Are you lonely?” 

“Mhm but not as lonely as pretty gege.” 

“I've noticed you've always called me that, Xiao Zhuo.” 

“You never told me your name.” Zhuo Yichen frowned, sounded accused.

“You never asked,” Zhu Yan teased. “Do you want to know my name?” 

“What's your name?” Zhuo Yichen asked, looking up at Zhu Yan. 

“Zhu Yan.” 

Zhuo Yichen mouthed the words and Zhu Yan waited for him to announce his realization of who Zhu Yan is. Instead Zhuo Yichen shook his head. 

“Pretty gege sounds better,” he told Zhu Yan and the omega yāo burst out laughing. 

“Xiao Zhuo, Xiao Zhuo,” Zhu Yan laughed. It brought an unfamiliar warmth to his cold dead heart. “Don't ever change that kindness,” he whispered and tucked Zhuo Yichen closer to his side. 

If anything, Zhu Yan would keep Zhuo Yichen by his side, holding him close and making sure he'll be safe but fate was never kind to him. Fate never granted anything for him except misery and chaos. 

His room doors were kicked open and a row of demon hunters streamed in. Zhu Yan sat up immediately, pulling Zhuo Yichen close to his side with a protective arm. He snarled at the demon hunters from the Zhuo clan, all staring at him with different levels of glare but Zhu Yan can smell the hesitation pouring from them. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Zhu Yan snarled again. “I've never broken any of your rules.” He pulled Zhuo Yichen tighter and felt small hands clinging onto his robes tightly. 

“But you have charmed my son.” Zhuo Yichen's father stepped forth with a hard glare. “And you hold him like he's your pup! Release my son, yāo!” 

“Baba,” Zhuo Yichen mumbled, scared and staring at his father pleadingly. “Baba, don't hurt gege. He didn't do anything!” 

“Chen'er, come here,” his father called sternly. Zhu Yan could see the high worry in his eyes. “Zhu Yan, let him go,” he hissed, ready to grab his son and Zhuo Yichen felt Zhu Yan's arm tightened around him. 

The air was tense and Zhu Yan knew Zhuo Yichen's safety came first. He slowly lowered his arm, glancing at Zhuo Yichen and secretly nudged him forward. Zhuo Yixuan made his way through the group, stepping in front of everyone, as close as he could stand in front of Zhu Yan. He smelt of cedar wood and sandalwood with post rut too and looked exhausted.

“Xiao Chen, come,” Zhuo Yixuan urged with an outstretched hand and Zhuo Yichen looked at Zhu Yan. 

The white ape yāo nodded minutely but one of the demon hunters—skittish and nervous—took it as a wrong sign. When Zhu Yan gently pushed Zhuo Yichen's arm with a clawed (unclawed) grip, the demon hunter yelled. 

“He's attacking the second young master!” 

And chaos erupted. 

Zhuo Yixuan shot the hunter a glare. He reached for his brother, ready to snatch him and Zhu Yan froze when the hunter lunged for them. Zhu Yan's eyes widened when the image of his little blossom overlapping with Zhuo Yichen's terrified face. 

Voices overlapped one another with scents of fear and anger. Neither knew who was shouting or what was going on. The demon hunter swung his sword at Zhu Yan but the angle was wrong.

Zhu Yan felt the world slowed down. The blade, sharp and strong, won't harm him but Zhuo Yichen was in the way. A child was an easy target and defenceless. Easily killed by the blade.

Zhu Yan's eyes slowly glowed red. His instincts screamed at him, to protect the pup that reached out to him with one hand. Childish giggles echoed in Zhu Yan's ears. His daughter's giggles and voice overlapped with Zhuo Yichen's voice. 

“Gege!” 

“Mama! Look!” 

“Zhu Yan, don't!” Zhuo Yixuan cried out.

“Baba, up! Up!” Li Lun huffed but lifted his daughter up with a single pull.

“Stop him!” Zhuo Yichen's father yelled.

“Mama. Mama, I'm here." His little blossom ran to him with a wide grin.

“Pretty gege,” Zhuo Yichen's soft voice broke Zhu Yan's spiralling consciousness. 

His eyes snapped towards Zhuo Yichen watching him with wide eyes. He saw the glinting sword tip closing in. Zhu Yan reacted without hesitation.

He grabbed Zhuo Yichen's arm, pulling the pup behind him and catching the blade in his hand. The hunter let out a yelp when Zhu Yan pulled the blade free. He threw a large spell that sent everyone falling backwards with a loud cry. He held Zhuo Yichen in his arms and the cut on his palm healed instantly. His yāo marks appeared and his silver hair was replaced with a veil of red. His eyes glowed red, darting at each face in anger and he breathed hard. 

His scent of peaches and apple blossoms was replaced with a scent of an angry omega. Sulphuric and ash like. Gone was the gentle omega Zhuo Yichen knew and the one standing in front of him was a yāo who could easily tear him apart. 

“Pretty gege…” Zhuo Yichen whimpered. Zhu Yan glanced down at Zhuo Yichen's wide eyes. “Zhu Yan, please.” 

Zhu Yan's harsh breathing slowly slowed down. A hand came into Zhu Yan's vision and he snapped his head towards the hand with a low snarl. He found Zhuo Yixuan in front of him, waiting patiently with a calm gaze.

Zhu Yan stared at it before slowly handing Zhuo Yichen to him. The brothers hugged each other and Zhu Yan didn't want Zhuo Yichen to see the next thing that would happen to him. 

Zhu Yan maintained his gaze on Zhuo Yichen's face and muttered a one word spell. “Dream.” Zhuo Yichen's eyes slipped closed and he sagged into his brother's hold. 

“Chen'er!” Their father cried, rushing towards them and carefully checked his youngest son. “Zhu Yan, what have you done to him!” 

Zhu Yan grinned at him. A grin that made him look mad with insanity and his eyes smiled in crescent shape. He laughed loudly, daring anyone else to talk but no one said anything until Zhuo Yichen's father stood with Zhuo Yichen in his arms. 

“Chain him! Bring him to the hall!” 

Hunters hesitated but obeyed. They rushed in, throwing ropes laced with yāo numbing powder over Zhu Yan's body. He felt the burn from the powder and he collapsed onto the bed. He couldn't move or do anything. Zhuo Yixuan looked torn between going to his brother and overseeing Zhu Yan's submission until their eyes met. 

Zhu Yan's eyes darted towards the retreating back of Zhuo Yichen's father. Zhuo Yixuan understood. He nodded and raced after his father. Zhu Yan closed his eyes, letting the little humans chain his arms and dragged him to the hall. 

The echoes of his daughter's laughter still rang in his head and Zhu Yan pushed the memory further away. 

Chapter Text

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yixuan's father spoke loudly and Zhu Yan felt all eyes on his kneeling form, including Zhuo Yixuan's. “All the years that we've allowed you to live here. We've never harmed you.” 

Zhu Yan wanted to laugh. The irony of not being harmed yet they've chained him to this wretched place for eternity. He stared blankly at them, refusing to answer. He wanted them to burn, to feel his pain.

“Give him twenty lashes!" The order was given.

The gold chains on his arms glowed brightly and Zhu Yan held back a hiss. It was the only power that can subdue him. His shoulders were grabbed, forcing him to be still. He was stripped down to the waist and Zhu Yan felt the torn clothes were such a waste. The braver demon hunters held him down, pulling his arms back and someone approached him from behind.

Leather, thick and heavy, with the scent of dried decaying blood made Zhu Yan's nose twitch in wariness. Zhu Yan knew the leather whip has been soaked in yāo's blood that he does not know. He didn't make a sound when the first crack was given and pain burned his skin. He didn't flinch when the lashes continued.

The only sound in the room was the sound of the whip cracking against flesh.  

“Strengthen the shield and do not let my son enter the room ever again!” 

Zhu Yan's gaze stayed blank and it got dimmer and dimmer until it was nothing. A gaze so blank that it made Zhuo Yixuan suck in a quiet breath. It was the same gaze he's seen when he returned to Zhu Yan's room at night, carrying a wooden tiffin.

Zhu Yan sat on the floor with his torn robes barely hanging on his shoulders. His hair, no longer the silver that Zhuo Yixuan knew, was all red wine. Zhu Yan heard Zhuo Yixuan approach but didn't react.

Zhuo Yixuan carefully set the basket down. “Zhu Yan,” he softly called and for a moment he released his own scent of sandalwood and cedar wood. 

Zhu Yan's nose twitched at the scent. He slowly blinked, turning to face Zhuo Yixuan. It took Zhu Yan a moment to realize someone else was in the room. 

“Young Master Zhuo,” Zhu Yan greeted with an empty tone, devoid of the usual playfulness or sarcasm. “You're here.” 

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yixuan called again and sat next to the yāo. He glanced at Zhu Yan's back and saw blood soaking the clothes with a frown. "May I?"

Zhu Yan tilted his head, pulling his hair over his shoulder and dropped the clothes. It fell onto the floor and Zhuo Yixuan saw dried blood caking the open wounds.

“You're still bleeding," Zhuo Yixuan said, examining the wound.

Zhu Yan chuckled dryly. “Whatever yāo's blood they use, it prevents me from healing properly.” 

“It's a whip mixed with poison and a dying yāo’s blood. Chongwu gifted it to us as a token of…friendship,” Zhuo Yixuan explained, opening the wooden tiffin top. “It'll slow the bleeding down preventing you from healing. It'll take a few days for it to stop bleeding completely.” He rummaged through the bottles of medicines.

“For torture. You humans have such strange ways of torturing us yāos,” Zhu Yan grinned but he hissed when Zhuo Yixuan gently wiped the blood away with a soaked towel. 

“Sorry. Please endure it.” Zhuo Yixuan continued to wipe away as much blood as possible, carefully dabbing the open wounds. “This will help to stop the bleeding," he tapped the bottle of blood coagulating powder.

Zhu Yan sat still, waiting for Zhuo Yixuan to be done. He heard the sound of ceramic clinking together. A pop, and the strong scent of some herbal liquid. He heard rustling and waited for the next step.

"This will sting," Zhuo Yixuan warned and pressed the soaked cloth onto the wound.

Zhu Yan hissed at the sharp stinging pain. Pain is something he knew very well and pain is all he's felt. When the burn finally subsided, Zhu Yan slowly breathed a sigh.

They sat in heavy silence. Zhuo Yixuan wrapped Zhu Yan's wounds with a clean bandage with precised movements. Almost like he's done this many times for others and Zhu Yan felt it was.

Zhu Yan watched the garden with the very same blank stare. Neither wanted to break the silence and neither wanted to talk about what happened earlier today. It felt it might shatter the space around them.

Zhuo Yixuan pulled his outer cloak off and draped it over Zhu Yan's back. He smoothed the fur out, making sure it wouldn't tickle Zhu Yan. He was letting himself be busy, refusing to dwell deeper onto the outcome.

Zhu Yan let him to be. He smiled in thanks when Zhuo Yixuan was done, but the smile never reached his eyes. Grey blue eyes looked away, unable to stare into those blank brown eyes.

It didn't feel right and Zhuo Yixuan clenched his hands tightly. He had heard of the gossip from the elders. They said Zhu Yan had placed a spell in Frost Pavilion, for anyone who entered was easily charmed. They blamed Zhu Yan for luring Zhuo Yichen in, hoping to use the little pup as a bargaining escape.

But Zhuo Yixuan knew it wasn't true. Zhu Yan has never charmed anyone or lured them to his room. The full truth was Zhuo Yichen had found Zhu Yan by himself and has been coming to visit the white ape yāo. 

“3 years,” Zhu Yan suddenly spoke. “I'll give you 3 years and if you can't find a mate by then, you'll have to claim me as a mate. You can't keep avoiding it.” 

“My father has done it," Zhuo Yixuan pointed out.

“Your father never stepped foot in this room when he was your age. I've never seen him until now.” Zhu Yan looked at him with a slow tilt of his head.

“He…”

“Zhuo Yixuan, I hope you can wield Yún Guāng sword one day and kill me,” Zhu Yan said. “Death is but a luxury for me to have and it's something that I want.”  

“What about Li Lun?” Zhuo Yixuan asked, giving Zhu Yan his attention and he saw the hardened mask Zhu Yan wore, cracked and splintered.

Zhu Yan's eyes widened. “How…you…where did you hear that name from?” 

“You always call that name out whenever we have our endeavours. You whisper that name and he was your mate, wasn't he?” Zhuo Yixuan eyed the mating mark on Zhu Yan's nape, old and scarred before looking at him.

“We are no longer mates,” Zhu Yan said, breaking his gaze to stare up at the moon. “Your family made sure of that."

"My family?" Zhuo Yixuan frowned.

"Oh? Did the elders not tell you?” Zhu Yan watched as Zhuo Yixuan's eyes widened in horror. “They severed my bond with my alpha. Each time your ancestors take me, they lay their claim on me,” he tapped at the scar, feeling the ridges of teeth and how the bite no longer healed properly.

"Until they die and another takes my alpha’s place. So when it's your turn, Zhuo Yixuan. I'll be yours until death do us part.” 

Zhu Yan grinned but his gaze seemed distant and unclear. Almost like he was being pulled into the swirl of darker memories. Darker than life he's lived. It was agony to know when something you've had was severely taken away from you.

Nothing will defeat the feeling of having your mating bond severed by another alpha. 

Zhu Yan remembered the feeling of having his nerves burn. The bond that was the only connection he had with Li Lun, keeping him sane when he was a prisoner here. He remembered feeling most of Li Lun's emotions. The anger, pain and longing for one another until it was severed. 

The hollow feeling in his chest became deeper, growing in a way that replaced the warmth to an emptiness that can't be described. The unexplained feeling of not knowing about your mate's feeling was like walking in darkness without a light. Not knowing where he was going or feeling. 

Each time they bit him, renewing the bond, Zhu Yan be in agony. He writhed in bed, feeling hot fire filled his veins, changing, twisting and tightening the new bond until he couldn't feel anything but the Zhuo alphas.

It left him weak and in pain for days. The bite never healed properly and Zhu Yan rejected the new bonds. It made him sick and pale, vomiting blood when he refused to accept the bond. They laughed at him. No matter how many times he's rejected the bond, it can never replace the bond he had with Li Lun.

They used him, played him and even used the bind on his arms to hold him down. He tried to fight but pain had left him weaker than a newborn yāo. Over the years, he accepted the pathetic bond, feeling their emotions through it.

He knew of their lust over him and the mates they married. He knew of their panic when Yún Guāng Sword never chose them. He learnt of their plans, some twisted and some indecent. He knew how some wanted to be rid of the family burden but none had ever thought to care for him.

He dug his own sharp nails into the bond mark, hoping to peel it off. He felt his nails catch against the ridges. He pulled, nicking himself but he never got far when his mate came barging into his room, stopping him. Screams of threats echoed in his ears and it disgusted him to the core.

Zhu Yan felt a faint touch to his cheek, snapping him out of the dark memories of trying to claw his neck and breaking the bond. He felt concerned grey blue eyes and the scent of sandalwood and cedarwood in the air.

“Are you okay?” Zhuo Yixuan whispered softly and Zhu Yan could only blink his eyes at the soft concern. “You smelt…like you weren't here.” 

Zhu Yan's eyes softened for the young alpha, the only one who has been kind to him. Zhuo Yixuan never treated him badly or degraded him as a breeding omega to lose the unborn pups.

He reached up to gently touch Zhuo Yixuan's fingers, feeling his fingers twitched underneath his touch. A small smile appeared on Zhu Yan's face. A smile that hovers between devoid and emotional.

“Maybe…if it's you…” Zhu Yan whispered, studying Zhuo Yixuan's face. “Maybe enduring this wouldn't be so bad…” 

~~~

Zhu Yan felt alone—despite being locked up for so long. He had gotten used to Zhuo Yichen’s presence and the pup's chatter. It was his little presence that made the coldness and loneliness feel less depressing and brought a sense of comfort.

But he should have known better than to allow himself the small sense of comfort. He was never meant to hold onto a small hope. Fate as he thought, is a cruel woman.

Zhu Yan laughed to himself that night, lying on his bed. He covered his eyes with his arm, allowing his tears to roll down his cheeks before wiping them away. There is no point in crying over something like this. He snarled at himself. He should have been more careful, more colder to push Zhuo Yichen away but a small part of him had wanted to believe in hope again.

He kept tossing and turning, unable to stop the gnawing worry in his chest. He felt trapped again and dislike the feeling. He got up from his bed, pacing the floor before inspecting the new gold barrier.

The difference was obvious, after having spend many times staring at it. It stood thicker and shimmering with scriptures running on it. It flowed like a slow lazy river. He touched the barrier and it rippled. His gold binds lit up, letting him feel the burn on his skin before he pulled his hand away. 

He can’t escape.

He can never escape. 

Zhu Yan flicked his sleeves with an irritated sigh and headed for bed. He pulled his blanket over his head, sinking into the cold darkness but was illuminated by the gold binds. The gold light dimmed until it left him in the dark.

He closed his eyes, hoping sleep would take him or so. A deeper part of him wanted to know if he'll ever see Zhuo Yichen again. A part of his instincts that seemed to settle whenever the pup was near but he knew better than to trust it again.

“Pretty gege?”

Zhu Yan slowly pulled his blanket off, squinting at the sudden brightness in his room. The contrast of light and dark almost blinded him but he blinked his eyes and waited. Wasn't it night just now? The sunlight felt like a mocking joke to him.

"Pretty gege?"

Zhu Yan heard Zhuo Yichen's voice by the barrier. He wanted to rush over, to check on him too but slowly stood up instead. He softly padded to stand by the edge of the wall where he could see the barrier and doors.

Zhuo Yichen stood in front of the barrier with his hand on it. He looked sad and so small that Zhu Yan felt the urge to comfort him. Old habits are hard to get rid off.

Zhu Yan sighed to himself. His once dead maternal instincts quietly resurfaced and he couldn't bare to see the little pup looking upset.

Zhuo Yichen looked at his feet with teared filled eyes.  “Zhu Yan…” he softly called, sniffling when he felt a ripple around his hand. It felt bigger. 

His head shot up and found almond shaped brown eyes looking at him softly. Zhu Yan's silver hair was tied in a loose low ponytail that draped over one shoulder. His robes were dark in colour with silver stitching embroidery. Gold hair beads weaves into his hair and it swayed when he tilted his head. 

Zhu Yan moved, sitting on the floor and Zhuo Yichen followed. The omega yāo leaned against the door’s wooden frame with a melancholic smile with Zhuo Yichen leaning against the other side of the door frame.

They both knew Zhu Yan couldn't reach across to brush those tears away. They knew that this would be how they would greet each other, through a barrier, and Zhuo Yichen hated the feeling of being separated.

“Why are you crying?” Zhu Yan asked. “Are you that sad to see me, Xiao Zhuo?” 

“No,” Zhuo Yichen sniffled loudly, wiping his nose with a little hand and looked down. “I'm sad that I can't hug you anymore.” 

“And I can't wipe your tears away.” 

“I'm sorry…” 

“What are you sorry for?” Zhu Yan asked, pulling his knees to his chest and laid his arms on top.

“That if I wasn't caught in your room that day, father and the elders wouldn't have put up a barrier.” 

Zhu Yan's soft chuckle made Zhuo Yichen look up. “Silly little pup. The barrier has already been there for a long time. You are too young to notice it.” Or that the barrier recognised him as the master. 

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yichen pressed himself closer to the doorframe. “Will this change anything for us?” 

“I don't know, little pup. I don't know.” 

Zhuo Yichen placed his other hand on the barrier and leaned against it. It rippled hard but it never broke or allowed him to pass through. He glared at the barrier with shimmering wet eyes. He curled his little hands into small fists and Zhu Yan thought he would injure himself.

Zhu Yan couldn't comfort him like how he usually did. He released his scent to calm Zhuo Yichen down. It worked when those tightly clenched fists unclenched and fell to his sides. His little glare relaxed and only the smell of a sad pup was permitted.

“Xiao Zhuo, you better return before someone sees you,” Zhu Yan warned and Zhuo Yichen glared at the barrier again. “You can still come and see me. I'll always be here.” 

“Promise?” Zhuo Yichen asked, looking up at Zhu Yan with a little hope in his eyes.

Zhu Yan smiled and nodded. “I promise,” he lied but Zhuo Yichen didn't need to know.

He urged the little pup to go, promising him again and Zhuo Yichen left after nodding in agreement.

Zhu Yan stared at the spot where Zhuo Yichen sat. He leaned heavily against the doorframe before lightly flicking his fingers, and the doors of his bedroom closed. The sight of the open hallway was like a call to him and he closed the scene away, blocking his temptation to escape.

~~~

Zhuo Yixuan entered Zhu Yan's room. Since presenting as an alpha, the elders of his family have been urging him to claim Zhu Yan. They wanted him to lay his bite mark, hoping to get the deed done before he could find a mate.

Zhuo Yixuan refused with a polite smile. He gave excuses, unlike his mellow personality, but his eyes flashed a bright blue glow in warning. It stunned the elders are first before hope grew. They whispered of Yún Guāng Sword choosing Zhuo Yixuan as the new master but the sword laid quiet in Zhuo Yixuan's hands.

He walked through the barrier, carrying a couple of boxes. Zhu Yan was sitting by the veranda again, watching the moonlight before turning to greet Zhuo Yixuan. The omega yāo warily eyed the boxes.

Zhuo Yixuan smiled at him, flipping one box open and showed Zhu Yan the heavy candle. "It's very dark in here," he said, lighting a few candles and placing it on the dusty candlesticks. "There, now we can see better."

The room was lit in an orange glow. The flames flickered lightly and the silver moonlight reached to join with the flames light. The room looked different when there was actual light and Zhu Yan didn't know what to feel.

"Is it necessary?" Zhu Yan asked, pulling his legs close to his chest and hid his toes underneath his robes.

He felt he didn't deserve to have candles in his room or any light for the matter. He glanced at the doors, waiting to see if he would be caught with having candles.

"Don't worry. I made the order to have candles in your room," Zhuo Yixuan said, keeping the rest of the boxes in a empty cupboard. "No one is going to come in accuse you of stealing."

Zhu Yan snorted an amused laugh. "I don't even step out from here," he pointed out. "But I'll be accused of charming you."

"I'm afraid it won't be that simple to charm me," Zhuo Yixuan teased with his own smile and it stunned Zhu Yan.

A huff of a laughter before Zhu Yan chuckled. "Young Master Zhuo has learnt to be witty with his comebacks."

"Someone was a bad influence."

A smile graced Zhu Yan's lips. He felt his cold heart flutter before it stilled. He didn't take notice at first, chalking it to being amused. He rested his chin on top of his knees, watching the candle flames flicker from the light wind.

"Can I sit next to you?" Zhuo Yixuan asked and Zhu Yan raised an eyebrow. "Basic politeness."

"You and your brother are the same," Zhu Yan pointed out but waved his hand. "Please. You can sit anywhere you want, Young Master Zhuo."

"Hearing you call me that when we are alone is a mouthful." Zhuo Yixuan sat beside Zhu Yan, rearranging his robes to be more comfortable. "I—"

"I've heard the elders are pressuring you to claim me," Zhu Yan said, cutting Zhuo Yixuan off. "And that Yún Guāng Sword has chosen you."

Zhuo Yixuan shook his head. "No it didn't. Its still…quiet."

Zhu Yan hummed and they lapsed into a growing comfortable silence. Zhuo Yixuan closed his eyes to meditate and Zhu Yan turned back to watch the moon.

"Do you play Go?" Zhu Yan asked softly and Zhuo Yixuan cracked an eye open to peer at him.

"I do. Do you want to play a game?" Zhuo Yixuan asked, watching Zhu Yan nod. "I'll bring a set the next time I come."

As promised, Zhuo Yixuan brought a Go chest set over when he came. Zhu Yan wasn't sure how he managed to smuggle the board and stones but he was grateful for the distraction.

He set his black stone down and Zhuo Yixuan followed with his white stone. They played over warm tea and flickering candle lights. Zhu Yan placed his black stone in a move that used to make Li Lun grumble. A complex move he was told and Li Lun would yield for not being able to win.

Zhuo Yixuan studied the pieces. His eyes darted from corner to corner, studying the strategic layout that Zhu Yan made.

"Giving up?" Zhu Yan teased, folding his hands into his sleeves to watch Zhuo Yixuan's expression.

The young alpha picked up his white stone, slowly twirling it between his fingers before a victory smile graced his lips. He set his piece down and the final clack of the stone was heard.

"I won," Zhuo Yixuan exclaimed and Zhu Yan peered at the board.

"You are the first person to defeat that move," Zhu Yan said, studying the pieces and it's maze like pattern. "Impressive."

"It was a tough position to crack but I did enjoy it."

"Another game, Zhuo Yixuan?"

Zhuo Yixuan smiled. He nodded and they cleared the board to restart the game. Zhu Yan laid his piece down and the sound of the stone hitting the board, felt like a stitch popping from his wounds.

Maybe he could believe in this lie.

Maybe he could let himself feel something again.

~~~

Over the last years, they played many Go games and little more trinkets have started to appear in his room. To liven it up as Zhuo Yixuan told him. He kept those little trinkets away, making sure it was never to be found by anyone but himself. It was a little treasure he felt he could hold, along with Zhuo Yichen's little odd trinkets when he was a pup.

Zhu Yan studied the Go game in front of him. It was one of their last games before Zhuo Yixuan had left for a case. The teen—no longer a teen—had turned eighteen a few weeks ago. As promised, Zhuo Yixuan was supposed to lay his bite on Zhu Yan but the alpha hasn't done it.

Zhu Yan expected that the young man was trying to stall. He twirled the stone piece between his fingers before placing it in a corner, far from the main design. The barrier rippled with the scent of sandalwood and cedarwood.

"You're back early, Young Master Zhuo," Zhu Yan said, looking up to find his vision being engulfed in a sea of white and blue.

Arms wrapped around his shoulders, freezing him on his spot. His eyes slowly widened with his arms in an awkward angle. He felt them tightened around his shoulders, puzzling him by the sudden action.

"Young Master Zhuo?" Zhu Yan asked and the scent of sandalwood and cedarwood took to a slight burnt wood scent. "Zhuo Yixuan, what happened?"

Zhuo Yixuan reluctantly pulled back, refusing to meet with Zhu Yan's questioning gaze. His grey blue eyes seemed troubled and the minutely shake in his hands was evident to his repressing emotions.

"You learnt something new," Zhu Yan stated openly, causing Zhuo Yixuan to flinch. "That has something to do with me. Did they tell you?" He moved, picking up a white stone and setting it on the board.

The loud sound made Zhuo Yixuan clenched his hands into a fist. He couldn't answer Zhu Yan and the omega yāo took it as it is. Another stone was placed and another. It felt an endless sound of an echo, repeating itself.

"I can make a few guesses," Zhu Yan continued, fiddling with the stones, thinking for his next move. "That the tea they give me every month is a suppressant and a heat inducing one." A clack of a stone. "And if I do get pregnant, a tea to induce miscarriages."

Zhuo Yixuan gritted his teeth. He just learnt from his father that the teas they brew for Zhu Yan are all drug to control his cycle. It's a reason why he keeps seeing Zhu Yan drink it or why he never mentioned of when his cycles start and it's a miracle that Zhu Yan's scent remained the same.

"You don't have to worry about a pup being born," Zhu Yan said, rummaging through the stone pots. "They don't make it to full term."

"Wha—"

Zhu Yan shrugged, picking up a white stone and placed it on the board. "You also learnt that I am to birth you a heir to wield Yún Guāng Sword." A glance to Zhuo Yixuan's shocked face. "And to keep me subdue in here. You are not the first to discover your family's secret nor the last."

"You…" Zhuo Yixuan didn't know what to say. He felt he was being told a deeper secret and Zhu Yan seemed unbothered by it.

"That I am nothing but a treaty tool." Another clack of a stone. "A simple whore omega to birth you an heir, to keep the peace between here and Dà Huāng, and to be married to you."

A final stone was placed on the board. It rang between them like a bell being rung.

"Why…" Zhuo Yixuan trembled with repressed anger. "Why do you just accept it? Why don't you rebel or fight? I know you're powerful to break free so why do you stay?"

Zhu Yan slowly lifted his head up from staring at the board. He turned to the garden, where the graves he's dug laid covered by new grass. The sunlight was bright and it shone with a warmth Zhu Yan loved and hate.

"Because," Zhu Yan said. "This is my punishment. I've committed a grave sin, Zhuo Yixuan and I can never be free from it."

Zhuo Yixuan frowned. "What did you do?" He asked but he felt like he knew the answer. He's heard of a yāo slaughtering humans and yāos before the Baize Goddess sent the yāo into imprisonment.

It wasn't hard to put the two together.

Zhu Yan grinned widely. His eyes were devoid of emotions and his eyes glowed red. The gold binds on his arms lit up in warning before the red glow disappeared.

"I wonder if you'll find the truth for it," Zhu Yan said mysteriously. "I'm forever tied to your family. I can never break free, Zhuo Yixuan. That is I stay." And to keep Li Lun safe.

"Don't you want to be free?"

Zhu Yan's hand paused in reaching for a black stone. Memories of being mock, belittled and used flashed before his eyes. Alphas after alphas laying their claim on him. Pups born dead and graves dug. He hid in the shadows, hating the sun or chasing after the warmth and despising the cold.

Memories of him and Li Lun standing in Dà Huāng's open field. Mock fights between each other, helping Ying Zhao on festivals, and being tangled in Zhu Yan's nest with kisses and roaming hands. Whispered words against their skin and promises made. Moments of happiness, gratitude and being one with another.

"Freedom is but a price to pay," Zhu Yan said, picking up a black stone and setting it on the board. "I hope you would fulfil the agreement, Zhuo Yixuan. Your three years time period is done."

~~~

Zhu Yan sat by the veranda, leaning against the pillar. Zhuo Yixuan had left that day in a swirl of emotions. He didn't even bother to say comforting words and decided the man needed some time to cool off.

Zhuo Yichen was being kept watch closely and hasn't managed to slip out to visit. Zhu Yan didn't mind that the younger pup be kept away. It was better that way.

A few days have passed and Zhu Yan has kept his room in darkness, never using the boxes of candles Zhuo Yixuan gave him. He didn't see the need when Zhuo Yixuan wasn't around. It suited him fine, preferring the cool night more than the day.

His doors were pulled open and Zhuo Yixuan stumbled in before the doors were slammed shut. Zhu Yan frowned at Zhuo Yixuan's slumped figure. From the shadows, Zhu Yan could make out the young alpha's distressed posture and then, he smelt the most tantalising scent of sandalwood and cedarwood, along with a musky scent of a rut.

Zhuo Yixuan is in a rut and he's in Zhu Yan's room. The omega yāo sighed softly, rolling his eyes at what the elders were doing. He slowly pushed himself from his spot and headed to Zhuo Yixuan's slump form against one of the pillars.

The closer he got, the stronger Zhuo Yixuan's rut scent was smelt. Zhu Yan slowly crouched in front of the fallen alpha, hearing the soft panting. The moonlight provided very little light and Zhu Yan waved his hand. Flame burst onto the candle tips, illuminating the room in a soft orange glow.

Zhuo Yixuan peeled his eyes open. He breathed in hard and smelled peaches and apple blossoms. He found Zhu Yan looking at him with a tilt of his head. The omega yāo rested his chin on top of his knees.

"You're in a rut now," Zhu Yan pointed out and Zhuo Yixuan softly groaned.

"The elders sent me here," Zhuo Yixuan explained, closing his eyes again when he felt a clenched in his lower abdomen. "I don't…"

"To make us mate so your rut can end early."

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes suddenly snapped open. He growled low in anger and Zhu Yan almost shivered from the sound. The young alpha was angry at his family, for the things they've done to Zhu Yan. He gasped when Zhu Yan suddenly pushed him down, climbing onto his lap and sat down heavily on his aching cock.

"No," Zhuo Yixuan huffed out. "I'm not letting you mate me."

"We don't have much of a choice," Zhu Yan said, grinding his hips down and sighed at the feel of a hard cock up against his clothed cunt. "Your three year time limit is over, Zhuo Yichen. And this is a faster way to end your rut."

"No," Zhuo Yixuan growled out but Zhu Yan refused to listen.

Zhuo Yixuan's lips were captured in a hard searing kiss. He couldn't help but to melt into the kiss. Zhu Yan deepen the kiss, coaxing Zhuo Yixuan to open his mouth. He felt the hesitation, the reluctance and he soothed the alpha by cupping Zhuo Yixuan's cheeks.

Zhu Yan traced the outline of Zhuo Yixuan's bottom lip with his tongue. A sudden hitch of breath and Zhuo Yixuan parted his lips in a silent gasp. Zhu Yan took that chance to slip his tongue in. He swiped his tongue against Zhuo Yixuan's, playing with him and he felt himself grow wet.

He's not in heat but his body is responding to the pheromones of an alpha's rut scent. Zhu Yan pulled Zhuo Yixuan's face closer, deepening their kiss until Zhuo Yixuan grasped Zhu Yan's hips.

The omega yāo felt a thrill run down his spine. Zhu Yan purposely grinded his hips down, feeling little twitches from Zhuo Yixuan's hard cock. He was suddenly pushed back, breaking the kiss with a wet pop. A string of saliva connected their wet lips and Zhuo Yixuan's pupils were dilated with lust.

Zhu Yan grinned. He's got the young alpha where he wanted. He gasped when he was flipped over. Zhuo Yixuan hovered above him with a dark and lust filled eyes. It made his cunt throb with heat, something that has never happened before—only with his time with Li Lun. He spread his legs open, accommodating to fit Zhuo Yixuan in between his legs. His hair splayed out around his head like a silver river, giving the look of moon god.

He reached up to untie Zhuo Yixuan's hair string, watching as black silky hair tumbled over the alpha's shoulder. Zhu Yan grasped at the headband, ready to pull when Zhuo Yixuan suddenly jerked away from him. The alpha shoved himself away, shaking his head and tried to steady his breath. He touched his headband, making sure it was secured but Zhu Yan had other ideas.

The omega yāo sat up, slipping his outer robe off. It fell like silken sheets, catching Zhuo Yixuan's attention. A hard whine escaped from the alpha's lips before grey blue eyes darted to look away. Zhu Yan found it amusing, shifting forward to touch Zhuo Yixuan's headband again. A low growl of warning but Zhu Yan hushed him with a burst of his omega scent, calming him and enticing.

"Why the hesitation?" Zhu Yan purred, nipping on Zhuo Yixuan's earlobe. "Just let me handle it."

"No," Zhuo Yixuan stressed out again and it was a word that Zhu Yan found amusing. "I can't…"

"It'll end the cycle faster. You don't have to restraint yourself when we are here. It's just you and me."

"I'm not going to do what my ancestors did to you."

Ah, Zhu Yan thought, feeling a small burst of warmth in his chest. "Little pup," he whispered, pressing his nose into Zhuo Yixuan's swollen scent gland. "When I pull this headband off, just let your instincts guide you." He pulled the headband off.

Zhuo Yixuan gasped, reaching to grab his headband back but Zhu Yan tossed it somewhere behind them. His grey blue eyes snapped at the omega yāo when arms wrapped around his neck. Zhu Yan had grin, hooded eyes boring into him and Zhuo Yixuan's inner alpha rumbled at the docile omega in his arms. Like a candlelight burning out, Zhuo Yixuan lunged for Zhu Yan, taking his lips into a hard and biting kiss.

Zhu Yan moaned into the kiss, pulling Zhuo Yixuan down for more. His clothes were pulled apart but Zhu Yan's eyes snapped open. Forced movements, harsh breathing into his ears, being held down as he was fucked hard, came crashing onto him like a wave. He shoved Zhuo Yixuan hard, scrambling back to grip his front clothes tightly.

His breathing was erratic and uneven. He swallowed hard, forcing himself to gulp air but he felt he couldn't. His eyes were wide and unseeing.

"You're nothing but a good omega whore."

Zhu Yan gripped the sides of his head. He covered his ears, hoping to block their voices echoing in his head. He couldn't breathe.

He couldn't stop the feeling of hands grabbing his wrists.

He couldn't stop the ripples of alpha commands sinking in him.

He couldn't stop hands roughly pushing his legs apart or a hard cock shoving into him.

He couldn't breathe. He gasped and dug his fingers into his scalp. He whimpered slightly, shaking his head and screamed inside at himself to stop.

Their laughter rang in his ears. They goaded him, whispering words of slurs and fake promises. They shoved him down to the cold floor, holding him as their hips chanted forward, hard and deep till they filled him.

He shouldn't be feeling like this. He shouldn't let the memories cloud him. He's here to help Zhuo Yixuan. He's here to help, to—

A gentle grip to his wrists stopped him from sinking his nails deeper. His head shot up to find Zhuo Yixuan looking at him. Sandalwood and cedarwood were thick and it was obvious the younger alpha was holding himself back from taking Zhu Yan.

"We don't have to do it," Zhuo Yixuan said softly, understanding shown in his gaze.

Zhu Yan shook his head, letting his hands fall to his sides. "No," he swallowed. "I'm fine. Just a lapse of…memory."

"Zhu Yan," Zhuo Yixuan almost whined and Zhu Yan cupped his cheeks. "Don't force yourself. I don't need you to make my rut cycle end faster."

Zhu Yan tried to crack a smile but it was more of a grimace than a smile. "I'm fine," he said. "Just don't pull my clothes."

Zhuo Yixuan sighed roughly through his nose. He nodded and Zhu Yan pulled him down for a kiss. They moved in sync, breathing through their noses as they deepened the kiss. Each swipe of a tongue, gently probing their lips, and the opened to let themselves taste each other.

Zhuo Yixuan was the first to break the kiss. He breathed hard, chest heaving and Zhu Yan looked slightly dazed. The younger alpha pressed his face into Zhu Yan's chest, wrapping his arms around the omega yāo's waist.

"I don't think," Zhuo Yixuan whispered. "I'm going to stay coherent soon."

Zhu Yan felt arms tightened. He returned the gesture, wrapping his arms and pulled Zhuo Yixuan as close as possible. He felt the hard outline of the alpha's cock and the blooming wetness.

"Then," Zhu Yan gently grasped Zhuo Yixuan's chin, lifting his face up and peered into dilating pupils. "Lay your claim."

~~~

Zhu Yan moaned loudly, tilting his head back when teeth nipped against the length of his throat. He wasn't sure when they took off their clothes but the feel of Zhuo Yixuan's hard body against his felt good.

Sandalwood and cedarwood was heady and smelt very different from the alphas he had grown used to. Something about Zhuo Yixuan's scent seems to call to him. It wasn't unpleasant or made his skin crawl.

It reminded Zhu Yan of Li Lun. Strong, woody, and very alpha. His inner omega, silent for so long, purred softly in agreement. He gasped when Zhuo Yixuan gave a hard thrust into his wet cunt.

The alpha's throbbing cock was hot, stretching Zhu Yan deliciously and it made the omega yāo's eyes fluttered close. For a young alpha, Zhuo Yixuan had a good size and it made Zhu Yan's wet cunt oozed with more slick. Zhu Yan's cock twitched when a particular hard and deep thrust made him see white dots in his vision.

He shivered at the hot pleasure snapping at his veins. Zhuo Yixuan was hardly holding back, panting against Zhu Yan's throat like a dog. His hot breath ghosted over Zhu Yan's skin. He jerked when Zhu Yan wrapped his arms around Zhuo Yixuan's neck.

It brought the alpha to rumble deeply. He held Zhu Yan's waist, pulling him down harder in time of his thrust. It will leave bruises but Zhu Yan could hardly think when it was just pure, hungry and hot pleasure filling him. It raced through his veins like malicious energy filling his inner core.

Hot, electric and it felt so good.

Unlike all of the fucks Zhu Yan had, where he was used to chase pleasure, hardly being given a release, Zhuo Yixuan was mapping his body like a treasure map. Bites and deep sucks were placed on what bare skin Zhuo Yixuan can find.

Zhuo Yixuan grunted when Zhu Yan clenched around his thrusting cock. He pulled back, letting Zhu Yan's arms hang around his neck, to glance down. The sight of seeing his hard cock disappearing into Zhu Yan's wet cunt was obscene and dirty. Globs of slick spilled out. Precum dribbled heavily from the tip of Zhu Yan's hard cock, wetting them further and it made the slide between them better.

Wet, filthy, loud squelching.

It seemed to fill the room. Zhu Yan mewled loudly, throwing his head back. Zhuo Yixuan set a rough hard pace, feeling his knot growing fast. He won't last long soon. He can feel his orgasm approaching. His cock throbbed and his knot caught against Zhu Yan's cunt.

It was hard to push in. Zhu Yan dug his nails into Zhuo Yixuan's back. A hard shiver from Zhuo Yixuan and he grinded his hips hard just as his knot locked them together. The burning waves of pleasure pulsed through them. His cock spurted long and heavy ropes of cum.

Zhu Yan's limbs shook when he came. His cunt squirted from the force of Zhuo Yixuan's cum filling him up. His cock spurted ropes of cum, splattering on his abdomen. Static buzzed in his ears and head. He moaned softly, feeling Zhuo Yixuan's cock throb and another spurt of cum had him arching his back, pressing their hips closer.

Zhuo Yixuan groaned lowly, falling forward but caught himself before he crushed Zhu Yan with his weight. His knot was large, locking them tight and he shivered when he cummed again.

Zhu Yan huffed a tired laugh. He's never squirted before, not even when he had sex with Li Lun, and found it to be wet and messy. He was dizzy from the rush, feeling his limbs shake from the high.

Zhuo Yixuan pressed his face into Zhu Yan's neck, finding the spot to be calming. Peaches and apple blossoms was strong and he carefully laid on top of Zhu Yan, wrapping his arms around the omega's waist.

Neither said anything, choosing to bask in the silence before Zhuo Yixuan's rut starts again.

For the first time, Zhu Yan didn't feel the repulsion whenever he was fucked by the alphas. He sighed softly, maybe it will be different, being with Zhuo Yixuan might change things.

Zhu Yan returned the hug, pulling Zhuo Yixuan down further until they were tightly held. Sticky and wet, but Zhu Yan closed his eyes, pressing his cheek against Zhuo Yixuan's hair and sighed softly.

~~~

Zhu Yan knew Zhuo Yixuan's rut would end earlier. They lasted two days until the younger alpha was better. The exhaustion was seen on his face and the scent of post rut too. They laid in Zhu Yan's bed, tangled in the sheets with their clothes laid scattered on the floor.

Zhu Yan found the warmth by his side to be nice. His pliant body melted in Zhuo Yixuan's arms. It brought him the memories of laying in Li Lun's arms, basking the afterglow of their cycles. It was the same with Zhuo Yixuan.

"Pretty gege?" Zhuo Yichen's muffled voice called from the door.

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes snapped open with wide filled horror. Zhu Yan seemed unperturbed by Zhuo Yichen's presence, finding it cute how the older Zhuo panicked. He got up from the bed, picking up his robe and tying the knots loosely.

Zhuo Yixuan's hand grabbed his wrist. "What are you doing?" He hissed quietly, gaze darting between the door and Zhu Yan.

"Greeting your brother," Zhu Yan answered, peeling Zhuo Yixuan's fingers and flicked the younger's forehead in punishment, and walked over to the closed doors.

He flicked his wrist and the doors creaked open enough for Zhuo Yichen to see Zhu Yan's face. They whispered to each other that Zhuo Yixuan couldn't hear before Zhu Yan bid Zhuo Yichen goodbye. He headed back to the bed, sitting on the edge and played with the ends of Zhuo Yixuan's hair.

"Your brother had an interesting expression on his face," Zhu Yan said, glancing at Zhuo Yixuan's wrinkled expression. "He might present early. I can smell a budding scent on him."

"Can you really tell when someone is going to present?" Zhuo Yixuan asked, peering up at Zhu Yan. "From the scent alone?"

Zhu Yan shrugged. "It depends but not always." He leaned down to steal a kiss before getting up to draw water from the well.

He heard Zhuo Yixuan following him with a curious low croon. Zhu Yan found it amusing that Zhuo Yixuan doesn't realized what he was doing. He pulled the bucket of cold water, dumping a washcloth in to soak.

"What are you doing?" Zhuo Yixuan questioned but he knew the answer.

"Washing unless you prefer to be walking out smelling like post rut and sex," Zhu Yan commented, squeezing the excess water out. "We are washing."

Zhuo Yixuan didn't question any further. He understood but it didn't make him feel any better. It was better to not ask and Zhu Yan kept it that way, wiping himself before Zhuo Yixuan took the cloth from his hand.

Zhuo Yixuan made a silent vow to himself, to find a way to set Zhu Yan free. It is a but a silent vow, dipping the washcloth and wiped Zhu Yan's arms. He continued his ministrations, catching Zhu Yan's unreadable look but the omega yāo let him clean him and was stopped before they went further.

Zhu Yan watched Zhuo Yixuan leave when the morning sun turned evening. Neither questioned the prolonged stay and neither said a word. Life continued as it always have for Zhu Yan, sitting by the veranda or by the door, listening to Zhuo Yichen babble away.

A changed in things started when Zhuo Yixuan's rut began in the next month. Zhu Yan took his knot, moaning into his mouth as he rode Zhuo Yixuan. The third month of Zhuo Yixuan's rut cycle, the heat inducing tea was given to Zhu Yan and he took it without hesitation, hiding it from the younger alpha.

Slick and dripping wet. His heat scent grew thicker, enticing the younger alpha who fucked him as hard as he could. Zhu Yan racked his fingernails over Zhuo Yixuan's back, drawing red lines on it. He mewled in pleasure.

His legs wrapped around Zhuo Yixuan's waist, bringing the alpha closer. His waist was held in a tight grip, pulling down to meet in time of Zhuo Yixuan's thrusting. He jolted from pleasure, feeling more slick gushing out and his cock twitching with precum dribbling from the tip.

Pleasure twisted Zhu Yan's face. His mouth fell open with moans that spurred Zhuo Yixuan to go faster. Skin slapping against skin was loud. It sounded like it was bouncing off the walls and Zhu Yan thinks it's just his own mind. He was brought back to the present, cumming with throb and Zhuo Yixuan locking them together with his knot.

Zhu Yan waited for Zhuo Yixuan to sink his teeth into his neck, claiming him in a bond. It never happened.

Zhuo Yixuan groaned softly, burying his nose into Zhu Yan's swollen scent gland. His instincts told him to claim the omega but he refused to do so. Zhu Yan shouldn't be tied to his family anymore and he won't claim him. He lifted his head up, claiming Zhu Yan's lips in a mewling kiss.

It was all he could do before they continued to tend to their cycle. And a seed so small was planted in their own souls. A seed that had little roots of fondness growing between them would be the downfall for their future.

~~~

Zhuo Yixuan's seed took root in Zhu Yan's womb after their synced cycle. Zhu Yan felt the bubbling of anxiety in his heart. He hardly had any pleasant memories of being pregnant in the Zhuo mansion. His heart raced with the thought of having Zhuo Yixuan discovering his pregnancy.

Would he be accepting? Would he threatened Zhu Yan? Would he kill his pup when he gives birth?

Flashes of his son being decapitated flashed before his eyes. A little face etched in a frozen scream. His unborn pups in little forms of life. Fetuses the size of a peach laid in his bloody palms. Still born pups curled in a fused state. Umbilical cords wrapped around their little necks, twisted and suffocating.

Zhu Yan gasped loudly before he scrambled to the edge of the garden and promptly vomited. When he stopped vomiting, thoughts swaying between morning sickness or the sick anxiety churning his stomach. Could be both and he placed his hand on his flat abdomen.

He clenched his robes in a fist. He should keep this pup safe. He should try to tell Zhuo Yixuan when the alpha comes back from a case. He should tell as Zhuo Yixuan deserves to know, having done nothing but shown him kindness and mercy.

He waited by the veranda, leaning against the pillar and watched the little stream in his room flow. A light breeze blew in, ruffling his hair when the scent of sandalwood and cedarwood wafted in. Zhuo Yixuan has arrived and the alpha set a tray of sliced peaches.

A different scent was brought in. Zhu Yan slowly turned his head to face Zhuo Yixuan. The alpha carried the scent of something different. Something that isn't part of Tiandu.

Dà Huāng.

It was the scent of yāo energy hanging on Zhuo Yixuan's shoulders. He looked up at Zhu Yan with a fond smile and a tilt of his head. Zhu Yan's gaze shifted to the plate of peaches. Peaches that grew in Dà Huāng and he wanted to ask but couldn't.

"What's wrong?" Zhuo Yixuan asked, breaking Zhu Yan's staring. "They are freshly picked and sweet. Do you want to try?"

Zhu Yan smiled, getting up with a small sway and to steady himself from the sudden dizziness. He should tell Zhuo Yixuan and made his way to the table. He sat down, not touching the peaches and studied Zhuo Yixuan's face. There was only a worried frown on the alpha's face and Zhu Yan felt he could tell him. But not without words.

"Zhu Yan?"

Zhu Yan grabbed Zhuo Yixuan's hand and gently placed it on his still flat abdomen. The confusion on the young alpha's face reminded Zhu Yan of Li Lun when they first found out he was pregnant. The confusion still remained and Zhu Yan lifted his arm to press his scent gland against Zhuo Yixuan's nose.

The alpha flinched but froze when he smelt a different scent on Zhu Yan. Beneath the peaches and apple blossoms was the faintest hint of milk. Milk that shouldn't be there and it dawned onto Zhuo Yixuan.

He looked at Zhu Yan in alarm. “You're pregnant?” He whispered and Zhu Yan slowly nodded. 

There was neither happiness nor tears of joy, only the air of confusion and uncertainty. They both knew the pup will never survive here and Zhu Yan felt conflicted. His buried instincts clawed at him to keep it safe. His mind told him to find a way to escape and most of all he wanted to know if the pup will live after it was born.

“I-I…” Zhuo Yixuan stammered but he didn't remove his hand nor did Zhu Yan pull away.

Zhuo Yixuan's voice was stuck in his throat and Zhu Yan was holding himself from ripping Zhuo Yixuan's touch away. They couldn't say anything to each other. It was a situation that they didn't know what to do.

Zhu Yan was so used to being threatened for his pregnancies. Zhuo Yixuan stared wide eyed at Zhu Yan's flat abdomen. Zhu Yan shifted, reaching over to take a piece of peach and bit into it. Peach juices spilled on his tongue and lips. He licked it with an unreadable gaze, finishing the slice.

"It's sweet," Zhu Yan said, breaking Zhuo Yixuan's daze. "You should eat it."

A silent tone to not question any further. A finality that they should leave it be, despite Zhuo Yixuan's uneasiness. He nodded, taking the peach and moved away to give Zhu Yan some space.

Zhu Yan continued to eat the peach and deep in him, he yearned for Li Lun. He wanted his mate to be here with him, holding him and helping him but it was all a wishful thinking when he doesn't even know if Li Lun was alive or dead.

They kept silent about the pregnancy but Zhu Yan couldn't hide it forever. Summer was a hard season for Zhu Yan to hide his abdomen swelling. He could hide it for now until the later months, he would start showing the obvious swell.

Zhuo Yixuan could only do so much to offer his support but they knew word will spread. They've forgotten briefly about Zhuo Yichen finding out Zhu Yan's pregnancy.

The young teen—now thirteen—sat outside the doors again, watching Zhu Yan absentmindedly stroke his abdomen. There was the slightest of curves to be seen and Zhuo Yichen's gaze flicked upwards to find Zhu Yan staring off into the distance. 

“Pretty gege,” Zhuo Yichen called, frowning at Zhu Yan's blank gaze. The omega yāo didn't answer. “Zhu Yan," he tried again.

“Hmmm?” Zhu Yan blinked his eyes and turned his gaze towards Zhuo Yichen's. “Oh, Xiao Zhuo. What's wrong?” 

“You're staring into the distance,” Zhuo Yichen said, shifting to lean against the doorframe. “Are you with child?” 

Zhu Yan's hand stilled. “What makes you say that?” 

Zhuo Yichen pointed to the obviousness. “Because I can see the difference. I'm not blind and I know you've been helping ge with his cycle. It was bound to happen. You also smell of milk."

Zhu Yan hummed, cracking a small smile. He can tell my scent has changed too. "Xiao Zhuo has gotten smarter." He heard the little annoyed huff and resumed his stroking again. “I am with child but it probably won't survive the full term.” 

“Won't survive? Zhu Yan, what are you talking about?”

“Nothing…” Zhu Yan shook his head and gave Zhuo Yichen his full attention. “Did anything interesting happen? It's been awhile since you've visited.” 

Zhuo Yichen knew Zhu Yan purposely changed the subject but chose to not voice it. There was a reason for it and he gave Zhu Yan's abdomen one last look. He huffed and whined about his brother going out demon hunting more often than usual. It made the younger Zhuo lonely and Zhu Yan understood that loneliness better than anyone. 

Zhu Yan listened to him, throwing jabs back and getting the teenager all riled up before Zhuo Yichen heard his name being called.

Zhu Yan watched him scramble to his feet, waving at him before darting off to escape from being caught. Zhu Yan huffed an amused laugh but stayed in the spot, stroking the small bump. He stared at the open courtyard where the magnolia tree sat.

A bird landed on the branch and Zhu Yan watched it with a blank stare. The bird tweeted loudly, calling for its mate and Zhu Yan saw another bird land next to it. It nuzzled its partner, huddling close together.

Jealousy bubbled in his chest at the sight. He wanted that comfort. The feeling of his alpha nuzzling him and Zhu Yan closed his eyes to remember the feeling of Li Lun's arms. He tried to remember the way he raced with Li Lun on the rocky beach of Dà Huāng.

He wanted to feel the grassy plains with his bare feet. He wanted to breathe in Dà Huāng's air, feel the breeze going through his hair. He wanted to sit by the rocky sea shore, watching and listening to the waves crashing with Li Lun.

He wanted all of that.

“Li Lun,” Zhu Yan whispered. “I want to see you again, my alpha.” 

~~~

Zhu Yan knew nothing will go smoothly for him. His pregnancy progressed normally until it didn't. He groaned at the stabbing pain rippling though his body. It was happening for awhile and he's growing tired from it. He was heavy and big but hardly due. He clutched onto the wooden railing, leaning heavily on it for support.

He breathed though the pain. He should have known that his body decided to choose the day Zhuo Yichen would visit. Not long ago, they've discovered that inanimate objects were easier to pass through the barrier. Since then Zhuo Yichen has been secretly passing all kinds of trinkets towards Zhu Yan.

A sharp pain made itself known and Zhu Yan cradled the underside of his pregnant belly. He didn't know if Zhuo Yichen appearing would scar the boy or disgust him. He panted in pain when he felt the trickle of something against his inner thighs.

He stripped himself from his pants, finding the edges slowly soaking with blood. More blood dripped down and it puddles beneath Zhu Yan's bare feet. He's forgotten how miscarriages can be but he wasn't expecting it to be this late. Pain made his body remember and his expression twisted. His felt a contraction, and carefully lowered himself to the floor.

“Zhu Yan!” Zhuo Yichen's voice sounded from the door. "Zhu Yan, what's wrong?"

Zhu Yan glanced up to find the teen staring at him with wide eyes. A wooden tiffin sat next to his feet and he slammed his hands against the barrier. The omega yāo couldn't answer him and he tore his gaze away to grip on the side of the railing and leaned forward from the pain.

Zhu Yan groaned, kneeling with his legs spread apart. This never got easier. His hair stuck to his sweaty face and the pain kept rippling through his body. He couldn't let his voice be known and he couldn't scream for help. He breathed through the pain when another ripple of contraction hit him. The scent of iron was strong and he curled forward, hoping for the pain to stop. 

He felt time has slowed but the pain kept increasing, along with the flow of blood. The golden blinds on his arms glowed, joining in adding more pain to his already pained mind. His grip on the railing tightened, squeezing his eyes shut and hoped for the best when he gasped at the sudden pop of pressure. 

The pain had stopped and something slid out from him. He panted for air, heaved for it. He carefully and slowly bunched up the bottom parts of his robes, lifting it up to peer down.

He stared blankly at the dead pup. Tears burned his eyes. It never gets easier. The pain and grief never stops. 

The pup laid unmoving with the umbilical cord still connected to Zhu Yan. The little thing was hardly a baby, Zhu Yan thought, judging from its features. It hardly had a face, destroyed with a layer of skin covering it. Its arms were fused as one, curving in front of it like single limb. Its curved back was nothing but ridges and Zhu Yan can make out its ribs.

Legs that should be there was deformed in a distorted way. One leg was bigger than the other. One had no toes and the other had no foot. It was more of a creature covered in human skin and blood.

Zhu Yan felt the malicious energy had distorted the baby's body, causing it to be formed like this. 

Or, it's your own body who didn't want it. Zhu Yan's twisted mind told him. His shoulders shook at the irony of it. He gathered the mess of a baby, cradling it close to his chest.

The barrier's ripples caught his attention form the corner of his eye. He carefully turned to see Zhuo Yichen staring at him with wide eyes and tears streaming down his cheeks. 

Zhu Yan didn't have any energy left in him to comfort the teen or even the thought of moving would send ripples of pain. He couldn't even smile reassuringly and he didn't know when his own tears fell. 

Exhausted and grief filled his body, Zhu Yan's eyes slipped closed. His body tilted to the side and he collapsed with his pup cradled close to his chest. Blood and other fluids soaked his clothes and Zhu Yan knew nothing but the cold darkness. 

He woke up to something wet touching his hand. It was night and the moon sat high in the night sky. He found himself to be lying on his bed, dressed in a fresh pair of clothes and water dripping from his fingers. He slowly turned his head to find Zhuo Yixuan cleaning his hands with a wet washcloth. 

A bundle of white laid on the table. Blood stained in patches and the room still smelt of iron. Zhu Yan knew who it was.

Zhuo Yixuan cleaned Zhu Yan up silently. He dipped the washcloth again, wringing it out and continued to clean the dried cakes blood in Zhu Yan's fingernails. They didn't say anything to each other and Zhu Yan felt his mind buzz with warning.

“Xiao Chen told me what happened,” Zhuo Yixuan whispered, never taking his eyes off of Zhu Yan's hand. “That…you went into premature labour.” 

It was more than that. Zhu Yan's body had rejected the pup, he thinks.

“The pup was already dead inside of me,” Zhu Yan croaked. “There was nothing to be done.” 

An angry glare appeared on Zhuo Yixuan's face. His scent took a fiery tone, matching his current feelings. It was the first time Zhu Yan saw Zhuo Yixuan being frustrated and angry.

The young alpha threw the wet cloth into the basin next to them. He gave Zhu Yan a hard glare. So unnatural on his usual calm face and Zhu Yan felt it didn't match his usually softer and kinder demur.

“Nothing to be done?” Zhuo Yixuan said, flabbergasted. “That—the pup was ours, Zhu Yan. Yours and mine. We could have saved the—” 

“The pup?” Zhu Yan prodded. “You can't save what's already dead. Even if I had given birth to the pup after full term, it would have been a stillborn. There's nothing you could do."

"Nothing? We could have done something! Anything to—"

"Miscarriages happen. It's natural." Zhu Yan said with a very blank look, not wanting to explain further.

“How can you…is it worth it?" Zhuo Yixuan suddenly questioned. "Saying that like you're alright with letting your own body kill your own child.” 

Zhu Yan's eyes flashed red. “Worth it? Do you think I wanted this? I live in fear if you would reject the pup. I live with the thought of you killing my pup, born or unborn,” he hissed, remembering his son's death and the multiple pregnancies over the years. “These bindings chain me from doing anything! I can never get any peace from you and you wanted me to bear you an heir to wield the sword.” 

Zhu Yan laughed pathetically. It sounded so hollow and empty like his heart. His eyes were devoid of any light and it was growing with a different kind of madness. 

“Zhuo Yixuan,” Zhu Yan said, pushing himself up and leaned close till they were nose to nose with. “Everything that happens here is because of your family. Everything that has happened to me is because of the fucking peace treaty between your family made and the Baize Goddess!” 

In a fit of anger, the first of an unfamiliar emotion burst in Zhu Yan's chest, he grabbed Zhuo Yixuan's front robes and pulled him closer than he already is, revealing a past that he never shared.

“It's all your fault! If none of you hadn't killed my blossom! If none of you hadn’t torn me away from my mate! If none of you had chained me to this prison. Everything is your fault! It's all your fucking fault!” Zhu Yan shoved Zhuo Yixuan away. “Get out! Get out!” He screamed and Zhuo Yixuan obeyed, never seeing the alpha.

Zhu Yan was left alone for the next few days. He refused to see Zhuo Yichen who sat by his door, waiting and watching from the corner. The omega yāo had curled up in his bed, staring blankly at the soaked dirty white cloth that had started to smell of rot.

It would go bad if he waited any longer. Decaying bodies were disgusting to clean up. Zhu Yan pushed himself off from the bed. He stood on shaky legs, picking up at the bundle. He ignored Zhuo Yichen's voice calling him.

He cradled the rotting body of his dead pup and slowly made his way to the garden in front of his room. He climbed over the railing. He heard the sound of rustling clothes and hurried footsteps.

It wasn't his problem to care currently.

He started to dig a grave with his bare hands once again. The countless graves he’s dug over the years have grown and he hardly remembers whether he’s buried his dead pups on top of the other.

He hardly remembers if they were fully formed or not. He remembered lowering their wrapped bodies into the graves and this current one was the same. He dug deep, ignoring the stinging bites to his fingertips until he felt the grave was deep enough.

He gently picked up the wrapped body. He slowly lowered it into the grave and pushed the first soil over it. The more he pushed the dirt, the more he felt like he was burying his own heart all over again.

He buried his pup and sat in the spot. He didn't have any more tears to shed. There wasn't anything left to cry. He stared blankly at the small mound of dirt, wishing it wasn't like this.

The clouds had turn grey and the sound of thunder boomed across the sky. Zhu Yan stayed in the spot even when the rain began to fall. The rain was his tears. It flowed down his cheeks in a mock set of tears. His clothes were getting soaked.

He couldn’t get sick and he didn’t care at all. 

He hasn’t cared for anything since he was trapped here. 

He hasn’t cared since his little blossom died.

He hasn't—

Rain stopped falling on top of him. He blinked his eyes a few times to get rid of the rain water. He waited for more rain but felt nothing. He wondered why and glanced up to find an umbrella hovering above him.

Someone was holding it and his gaze followed the length of the dark blue oiled paper umbrella until he found the person holding it. Zhuo Yixuan stared at him from above and Zhu Yan simply stared back. 

Zhuo Yixuan didn’t say anything, choosing to kneel next to Zhu Yan. He looked at the freshly dug grave and closed his eyes at the burning of his own tears. His child, his flesh and blood was now one with the earth. He sent prayers for his child, hoping it would be free from any grievance.

They sat together, watching the rain soak the soil.

Time moved but the rain continued to fall. Zhuo Yixuan slowly stood up, gently grabbing Zhu Yan's arm. He guided Zhu Yan into his room and past the folding screen. A steaming hot bath was ready—a first to be seen.

Zhuo Yixuan carefully stripped Zhu Yan from his wet robes, letting it fall heavily onto the floor. Zhuo Yixuan continued to guide Zhu Yan to sit in the wooden tub, and began to pour water over Zhu Yan's hair.

They didn’t talk nor comment about the domestic kindness. Zhu Yan’s eyes were downcast, staring at his reflection with broken ripples from the water falling on him. He hadn’t noticed how terrible he looked and Zhuo Yixuan’s gentle comfort made his heart ache terribly.

Zhu Yan slowly blinked when something reflected in the water. Something new and never seen in his room before. He looked up from his reflection, staring straight ahead.

He found what was new. Sitting innocently on a small table was a white flower vase by the open window of the garden. He didn’t care what the vase was but only the content sitting in it; a bouquet of pagoda flowers.

Zhu Yan lurched forward, startling Zhuo Yixuan and the omega yāo quickly climbed out of the wooden tub. Water cascaded down his naked body. Goosebumps rose from the mountain air chilling his skin but nothing could deter him when he rushed towards the bouquet. 

Its white small flowers fluttered in the cold wind and Zhu Yan’s eyes were wide. Underneath the scent of the mountain was the scent of pagoda flowers. Zhu Yan’s heart twisted painfully.

Li Lun’s smile flashed in his eyes. The memory of them lying against the pagoda tree, tangled in its roots, hiding from any straying eyes, was their little sanctuary. Li Lun’s touch ghosted over his bare skin and Zhu Yan felt like he couldn’t breathe. 

His fingers trembled to touch the pagoda flowers but he pulled his hand back. Tears, hot and fresh, started streaming down his cheeks as he slowly sank to his knees.

A cloak was draped over his naked body, and Zhu Yan curled inwards, nearly resting his forehead against the wooden floor. 

“Li Lun,” Zhu Yan choked his mate's name. “Li Lun, Li Lun.” He repeated the name over and over, like a mantra.

He called for his mate who will never answer him and Zhu Yan cried silently. He was pulled into Zhuo Yixuan’s embrace, who quietly held him.

Zhu Yan let himself cry for everything that he hadn't cried before. He cried for the pup he just lost. He cried for the freedom he lost. He cried for the mate whose name he calls for. He cried for his little blossom and he cried for the kindness comfort Zhuo Yixuan is giving him.

Zhu Yan cried when he thought he couldn’t cry anymore. 

Chapter Text

Zhu Yan gently stroked Zhuo Yixuan’s cheek as the young alpha slept. The young alpha was no longer eighteen and had reached the age of twenty. His features had changed, matured till he was a young man. Zhu Yan's fingers gently glided over Zhuo Yixuan's eyebrows, smoothing out any frown, and continued to stare at him.

Their last Go game laid in the middle of the room. Black and white stones showing their half completed game before Zhu Yan pulled Zhuo Yixuan's headband off, snapping the alpha into pulling him down for a hard kiss.

Zhu Yan remembered the hot touches on his body. Clothes falling off from their bodies as they clumsily made their way to the bed. Three fingers slipped into his cunt easily, finding him all wet and eager. Zhuo Yixuan scissored him open with Zhu Yan moaning that made Zhuo Yixuan hard like he was having his rut cycle.

Zhuo Yixuan didn't hold back, grabbing Zhu Yan's hips and pulling his fingers out. His cock, hard and throbbing, slid in easily. It filled Zhu Yan, stretching him with a shudder and he bite back a moan that would make Zhuo Yixuan twitch in him. A slow drag of his cock out sent Zhu Yan keening.

A set rhythm, slow and deep, pushed Zhu Yan further into the bed as Zhuo Yixuan dragged his orgasm in a slow point. Zhu Yan arched his back with a low guttural groan, dragging his fingernails down Zhuo Yixuan's back.

It made the alpha groan in return, snapping his hips up and pushing his cock deeper. Gasps and mewls sang along with pleas. It drove them mad with lust, neither in heat or rut, just chasing after the high pleasure they were seeking.

Zhu Yan tilted his head back, exposing his neck and the scared bite. He urged Zhuo Yixuan to claim him, to renew the bond between a Zhuo and him. But Zhuo Yixuan never claimed.

The alpha never gave his bite, choosing to nuzzle and lick the scared mark. He mouthed and bite the skin, leaving bruises all over like a necklace of purple gems.

Zhu Yan whined loudly, closing his legs around Zhuo Yixuan's hips, and threw his head back. Zhuo Yixuan's back muscles rippled with his movements, making Zhu Yan scrambled to hold onto till they felt their orgasms approaching.

A cry was swallowed with a bruising kiss. Zhuo Yixuan's knot inflated, filling Zhu Yan up with each grind of his hips. A bursting warmth filled Zhu Yan with a low moan. His legs shook when he cummed too.

Zhu Yan's cock twitched with each spurts of cum and his cunt clenched around Zhuo Yixuan's knot and hard cock. Slick and cum dribbled over, staining Zhu Yan's thighs and Zhuo Yixuan's hips. Another deep grind forced Zhu Yan to spread his legs open, stretching himself wider and Zhuo Yixuan's knot went down after a minute or two.

They panted into their mouths, stealing kisses along before they started another round. They laid together in a tangled mess of legs, blankets and pillows.

A sizeable collection of pillows and blankets were accumulating in Zhu Yan's room, enough to build a comfortable nest on the bed, and Zhuo Yixuan wondered why.

Zhu Yan would hide the collection in the cupboards in his room or hand it over to Zhuo Yixuan to keep away. It wasn't until Zhuo Yixuan watched his little brother sneakily passing the softest pillows to Zhu Yan through the barrier and Zhu Yan would humour the teen.

Over the two years, Zhu Yan's relationship with Zhuo Yixuan had changed and developed since the burial of their pup. Grief and sadness still hangs over Zhu Yan like clothes that can never be taken off, heavy and exhausting but each time Zhuo Yixuan smiled at him, visited him to play Go, it slowly warmed Zhu Yan's cold heart. 

Zhuo Yichen wasn't allowed to enter but it didn't deter the younger alpha—presented when he turned fourteen as Zhu Yan suspected—to spend time with Zhu Yan. The little boy—no longer a boy—carried the scent of snow and fresh water. Different from his brother but Zhu Yan had no qualms about the scent, finding it pleasant.

Between the two Zhuo brothers, Zhu Yan found his current life to be slightly interesting and less painful. Whenever Zhuo Yixuan heads off for a case, he would consult with Zhu Yan about the different types of yāos.

Zhu Yan could only provide so much information but Zhuo Yixuan took it with a grateful smile, laying a kiss on Zhu Yan's cheek before leaving. Like a ritual, Zhuo Yixuan would return, bringing back a stalk of fresh pagoda flowers. 

It puzzled Zhu Yan at first, taking the fresh pagoda flowers and replacing the dead flowers in the vase. It felt like a courting gift, like the time Li Lun braided flowers and twigs into Zhu Yan's hair.

A memory that felt old and far.

Zhu Yan wanted to hate the gifts but each new stalk was a reminder of his old mate and it made the absence of Li Lun a little easier. Sometimes when he was completely alone, without Zhuo Yixuan or Zhuo Yichen looking for him, he would whisper to the pagoda flowers, delusional himself that he was talking to Li Lun.

"You know," Zhu Yan said, sitting by the vase and staring out at the garden. "He reminds me of when you used to court me." He smiled a small smile with the barest hint of warmth. "He's sweet, sweeter than you."

A wind breezed in, ruffling the pagoda flower petals. Almost like Li Lun was agreeing with him. He huffed an amused laugh. He leaned further onto the railings, letting the breeze ruffle his hair too.

He breathed in deep, finding his room pleasantly mixed with the scent of sandalwood, cedarwood, peaches and apple blossoms.

It smelt like a small mixed of forest and garden meeting together. Two different kinds but yet feel the same.

Zhu Yan blinked his eyes a few times, finding the scent to be pleasing. His inner omega, so quiet and skittish, crept up slowly. A broken purr was sounded at the scent. It startled him, silencing his purring with a clamp to his mouth. His eyes widened with a dawning realization.

Oh, he realized. He's slowly falling for the oldest Zhuo.

He knew the moment he started to care for Zhuo Yixuan, waiting for his return and checked him for any injuries, was the moment he developed feelings. He felt like a fussy omega wife and Zhu Yan almost growled to himself. Zhuo Yixuan was amused and patient, allowing him to fuss over and in return, Zhuo Yixuan gave Zhu Yan a new pagoda flower stalk and treats.

Those moments, where it wasn't all about pain and being used, hated or spat on, were what he craved the most. Little soft moments that were kind to him, slowly mended the fractures in his fraying soul.

But currently, in this moment, Zhu Yan continued his light tracing on Zhuo Yixuan's face. The alpha slept peacefully and without any worries. Zhu Yan found it adorable how easily Zhuo Yixuan found a small solace in Zhu Yan's room—the same as Zhuo Yichen.

A trace to Zhuo Yixuan's nose made the alpha stir from his sleep. He slowly blinked himself awake and found almond shaped brown eyes watching him fondly. He blinked sleepily, tilting his head to nuzzle Zhu Yan's palm.

A quiet chuckle felt warm to his ears.

“Decided to wake up?” Zhu Yan teased and Zhuo Yixuan groaned softly. "The sun has risen high now."

“I am not sure where you even have the energy to be awake." Zhuo Yixuan huffed, rubbing his eyes and yawned. "I made you cum twice and yet you wanted more. I didn't realize yāos have so much stamina,” Zhuo Yixuan grumbled, rolling onto his back with a sigh. 

Zhu Yan rolled his eyes. “I wasn't the one who actually slept for a whole day. You've caused Xiao Zhuo to panic when you didn't arrive for breakfast and wasn't in your room.” 

Zhuo Yixuan grimaced. “Xiao Chen will…understand one day…” 

The reluctance in his voice told Zhu Yan everything he needed to know. Zhuo Yichen was to be spared from this treaty. The older alpha didn't want his brother to be subjected to the events. A life as innocent as Zhuo Yichen should be spared.

Zhu Yan doesn't like the feeling of seeing those grey blue eyes shrouded in darkness. It didn't suit any of the Zhuo brothers. It wasn't right and he wanted it gone. He felt his heart warm at the protectiveness the brothers had for each other. It reminded him of Li Lun.

A small twinge in his heart was felt. He felt like he was cheating on Li Lun but he doesn't know if the pagoda tree yāo was alive or not. He's chained to his room, never seeing anything further than the magnolia tree growing.

He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to Zhuo Yixuan’s forehead. The surprised look on Zhuo Yixuan's face made Zhu Yan grin. Fingers slipped to the back of his head, pulling him down for a kiss. He tilted his head to the side, deepening the kiss and softly moaned.

They carefully broke away. Zhuo Yixuan gently stroked Zhu Yan's cheek when loud furious knocking came from the main bedroom door shattered the atmosphere between them.

“Ge!” Zhuo Yichen called, voice muffled from behind the bedroom doors. “Are you finally awake? Are you decent enough? Ge leave Zhu Yan alone to rest more."

Zhu Yan laughed when Zhuo Yixuan suddenly rolled out of bed. He watched the alpha scurried for his clothes, hastily putting them on.

Dignity be damned if he gets caught naked by his younger brother, Zhuo Yixuan thought. He slipped on his inner robe, tying the strings and pulled the second thick robe on.

Winter was coming soon and the air was getting colder. He shivered from the cold breeze while Zhu Yan seemed unbothered by it. He wondered why he didn't feel cold when he spotted a brazier sitting next to the bed. Little orange and red ember burn the charcoal, keeping them warm.

Zhu Yan must have convinced Zhuo Yichen to smuggle the brazier to him or they would have been sleeping in the cold.

“You do remember that he can’t enter my room right?” Zhu Yan reminded him, lazily stretching on his bed, showing his naked and bruised body.

Zhuo Yixuan glanced over, wanting to admire Zhu Yan's physic but he saw the purple bruised kiss marks and bites littered all over Zhu Yan’s body. The sight was erotic in a strange way and his inner alpha rumbled in delight. Seeing his marks laid on Zhu Yan's skin, telling everyone who decides to peak in, will know Zhu Yan currently belongs to him.

He quickly shook his head, getting rid of the thoughts. Zhu Yan doesn't belong to him—technically he does—and he isn't an object that is easily cast aside like a toy.

Zhuo Yixuan quickly looked away, slipping his outer robe on and tied the strings quickly. He can smell Zhuo Yichen's impatient scent. The young teen hasn't learnt to control his scent yet. Zhuo Yixuan ran a hand through his hair to make himself look decent enough. 

“It wouldn’t hurt to be decent,” Zhuo Yixuan said and Zhu Yan rolled his eyes. The omega yāo pushed himself off from the bed, standing up with the marks displayed on his body. “I…didn’t hurt you, did I?” 

Zhu Yan raised an eyebrow. “Zhuo daren, I think it's a bit late to even ask that question. I didn't know you were keen on covering me with your mark," he teased. "Even if you did hurt me, I can heal myself."

"Ge, are you done yet?" Zhuo Yichen said out loud with a tint of frustration in his tone. "We better hurry before father catches us."

"You better leave before Xiao Zhuo figures out a way to get you out of my room," Zhu Yan chuckled, picking up his outer robe and slipping it on.

Zhuo Yixuan sighed and nodded. He quickly tied his hair into a half ponytail and headband around his forehead. He smoothed his front down, making sure he looked decent enough. He turned to find Zhu Yan casually tying his robe and ran a hand through his hair.

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes softened slightly, stepping closer and Zhu Yan offered him a raised amused eyebrow and smile. He threaded his hand behind Zhu Yan's nape and pulled him down for a kiss. The omega yāo pressed closer to him, chasing his lips before lightly tapping Zhuo Yixuan's cheek.

"Go before you start to strip me off from my clothes again," Zhu Yan teased and Zhuo Yixuan shook his head.

Zhu Yan watched him leave, opening the room doors. A soft, "finally," was heard from Zhuo Yichen. It made Zhu Yan chuckled quietly, deciding to freshen up, heading to the little covered corner he reserved for a bath.

A wooden basin sat on a stand, filled with cooled water and he dipped the wash cloth into it. Dropping his clothes, he cleaned himself up, touching the bruises made from the alpha. Memories of Zhuo Yixuan's slight rough handling made his cheeks flushed red.

He huffed to himself, pulling on one of his dark red robes and casually tied it. He brushed his hair with a comb Zhuo Yixuan quietly gifted him. A wooden black comb and Zhu Yan held it with a precious grip. He left his hair loose and headed for the veranda to wait for Zhuo Yixuan's return later.

~~~~~~

Zhu Yan casually rolled the black stone in between his fingers, contemplating his next move for the Go game he was playing by himself. A bowl of heat suppressant tea sat next to him. He hasn't touched it yet, deciding his move.

He set the black stone and picked up the bowl. The bitterness of the medicine was smelt. A stronger dosage today. He placed his lips against the rim when the bowl was suddenly snatched from his hand.

It dangerously sloshed to the tip, almost spilling over. He blinked at his empty hand. He looked up to find Zhuo Yixuan staring at the bowl with a closed look. Zhu Yan watched him pour the medicine out in the garden and set the bowl with a controlled sigh.

"They'll just give another one," Zhu Yan said, digging through the bowl of white stones. "There really isn't a point to throw it away."

"Do you know what it does to your body?" Zhuo Yixuan stressed out, frowning deeply. "The consequences it will have."

"I think it's made known for a long time," Zhu Yan answered, placing the white stone.

"It doesn't mean you have to keep taking it. I've watched you drink it every month without fail."

"And it's always been like that for the years I've lived here. What difference does it make now?" Zhu Yan studied the board, ignoring Zhuo Yixuan's sudden spike of sour scent.

"You…" Zhuo Yixuan grimaced and Zhu Yan sighed loudly, turning away from the game.

"It doesn't matter if I drink it or not. It stays the same."

"And I'm not allowing you to drink it. It destroys your body."

"Zhuo Yixuan," Zhu Yan said, tilting his head to the side and studied the alpha. "You're not really my alpha. You haven't made your claim on me.

"That's—"

A soft sigh and Zhu Yan stood up, abandoning his game. "Fine, I'll not take the suppressants if that pleases you." He circled around Zhuo Yixuan. "But that's if you make your claim on me. You need to remember, Zhuo Yixuan. You still need to uphold the contents of the agreement."

Zhuo Yixuan clenched his hands into a tight fist. His scent had turned more than just sour. It smelt like the ashy and burnt bark. An angry alpha was something Zhu Yan was used to over the years.

It reminded Zhu Yan of what Li Lun smelt like when he was angry. The pagoda tree yāo would simmer in anger, growing new trees or plants and Zhu Yan would pull little twigs out from his long hair. It felt the same with Zhuo Yixuan—minus the twigs in the hair—and he felt fond of it.

It felt like he had gained a piece of himself that was lost and broken. A simple act of someone being angry for him. A broken shattered piece of his soul was mended and Zhu Yan wanted to protect Zhuo Yixuan till the end of Zhuo Yixuan's life.

Zhu Yan stopped in front of Zhuo Yixuan, studying his tight expression. Zhuo Yixuan's gaze looked deep and troubled, almost like he was trying to figure something out. Zhu Yan cupped Zhuo Yixuan's cheek, startling the alpha and brushed his skin lightly.

His lips quirked upwards in a quiet smile. "I won't take it," Zhu Yan said softly, letting his scent of peaches and apple blossoms softly fill the air between them. "You've shown me enough. If time and situation was different, I wouldn't have mind staying with you."

Zhuo Yixuan caught Zhu Yan's wrist, thumbing the gold bracelet and gave it a soft glare. He disliked what the bracelets does to Zhu Yan. A leash for keeping him in this place and a way to control him.

"If there is a way, I'll find out how to break this," Zhuo Yixuan said and Zhu Yan slowly pulled his hand away.

Li Lun promised the something similar and it has been a long time since then. Zhu Yan's heart trembled, making his emotions swirl between hope and bitterness. He stepped away, pulling from Zhuo Yixuan's touch.

"Don't make promises you can't uphold. We don't know what the outcome will be," Zhu Yan warned. Or if you'll set me free.

"Ge," Zhuo Yichen's voice called from the door, catching Zhuo Yixuan's attention. "Father wants to talk to you."

"Not now Xiao Chen," Zhuo Yixuan said, wanting to continue but Zhuo Yichen sighed loudly.

"He said it's important."

"Go," Zhu Yan said, moving to sit in front of the Go board. "It sounds important."

"Zhu Yan," Zhuo Yixuan gritted his teeth and Zhu Yan placed a black stone on the board. "I made a promise and I'll keep that promise. You know I won't break it."

"You sound exactly like Li Lun," Zhu Yan said, stunning Zhuo Yixuan. "He made a promise to me but it has never been fulfilled. So do not make promises that can be broken both physically and figuratively."

"I—"

"Ge!" Zhuo Yichen yelled out. "Father is waiting. I can't give any more excuses for you."

"Go, Zhuo Yixuan." Zhu Yan's tone meant the argument was done and he heard the alpha sigh again. "Don't worry, I'll be here waiting for you," he said, looking up to offer a smile.

Zhuo Yixuan nodded, hesitating to move before leaning down to press a kiss to Zhu Yan's forehead. He left with the lingering scent of sandalwood and cedarwood. The barrier rippled as he left and Zhuo Yichen stood by the front, fidgeting.

"Do you want to play a game of Go, Xiao Zhuo?" Zhu Yan asked, hearing the pouting huff from the younger alpha.

"You're not going to play that hard strategy again, are you?"

Zhu Yan chuckled. "You make it very easy," he teased. "If you can win this game, I'll tell you the secrets of it."

~~~~~~

Zhuo Yixuan returned to Zhu Yan's room a few hours later. He found the omega yāo and his brother playing a game of Go by the door. Judging from Zhuo Yichen's frustrated expression, he had lost a game with Zhu Yan.

"Xiao Chen," Zhuo Yixuan called, breaking the game up. "Go and practice your sword. I saw how sloppy your movements were."

Zhuo Yichen wanted to protest but he took one look at his brother and felt something was wrong. He hastily got up, nodding in agreement and left to practice. He grumbled softly but obeyed his brother's orders.

Zhuo Yixuan faced Zhu Yan with a pursed lips. Zhu Yan wisely avoided his gaze, cleaning up the mess. He picked up the board and put it back by the table while Zhuo Yixuan entered the room.

"You seemed troubled," Zhu Yan said, setting up a new game. "A hard case?"

Zhuo Yixuan shook his head. "No, I have to go to Mount Kunlun."

"Ah," Zhu Yan said, clenching his grip over the black stone. "Dress warmly. It's colder around this time of the year." He said, placing the black stone harder than he should.

He assumed it would be about the treaty. About him. He was never given any information about further contents of the treaty, choosing to remain silent about it. He tilted his head, releasing his scent to calm Zhuo Yixuan down.

"A game before you leave? Just a quick one." Zhu Yan looked up, smiling at him.

They played a game, as quick as they wanted but was left unfinished when Zhuo Yixuan was called. He left with a touch to Zhu Yan's cheek and the omega yāo knew the younger alpha wouldn't be returning anytime soon. He left his seat to sit by the veranda again.

The bowl of heat suppressants still sat by the table, empty and dry. He felt he should have taken it but seeing the worry in Zhuo Yixuan's face made him believe it's not worth it. And it became a mistake on their part when the night came.

A night that would turn into tragedy one.

And it was a mistake on their part. A mistake that could never be undone. 

The moon turned red before Zhu Yan's eyes. He scrambled to stand up with wide eyes. He hurried inside, grabbing the bowl and sniffed it. The heavy scent of herbs was smelt and he licked the bowl to taste the contents. It was heavier, bitter and most of all was the only drug that would subdue him on a night like this.

"No," Zhu Yan whispered, dread filling him. He ran to the closed doors, slamming his fists onto the barrier. "Someone! Get the—"

He stilled. Arms fell to his side and his gaze went blank. The malicious energy hissed in greeting, slithering and covering him in a layer of red. His eyes glowed red and his yāo markings appeared. His silver hair disappeared, turning back to it's true colour.

His rational mind was gone and all he felt was the infinite desire to kill. Whispers of revenge and anger whispered into his ears. The familiar sensation of a beast looking to satisfy its blood lust. He breathed in slowly, grinning at the power pulsing through him like a familiar warmth. 

His fangs lengthened and he licked his dry lips, wanting to taste blood once more. Blood he was denied for so long and he hungered for it. 

He hungered to paint the floor red, to hear the agonized screams of his victims as he kills them. He straightened his back in front of the barrier. It rippled from his presence and the gold bracelets lit up in warning. It burned him but pain was nothing to him.

After all, the blood moon was only the time when he was at his peak without the heavy drugs.

His eyes glowed red. "Break," he said his one word spell and the barrier shattered into a million pieces. 

He carefully stuck his hand through, feeling it passed by. His eyes widened with excitement.

He's free.

He’s no longer caged like the beast he is. He stepped through, breathing in the sweet scent of the night and his blood sang with joy. He was going to get his revenge.

He stalked the halls like a hungry predator. 

Demon hunters ran through the hallways, yelling out orders and cries of him being loose. They pulled their swords out and Zhu Yan stopped in his tracks. They surrounded him, hoping to stop him and he grinned at them.

“Blind.” 

They screamed in pain when their eyes started to melt in their sockets. Blood drenched their faces in running bloody tears. Their agonized screams continued until they dropped dead to the floor one by one.

Zhu Yan stepped over them easily like they were nothing but thrown toys scattered on the floor. He continued along the way, choosing to dye his hands in blood or muttering his spell. He grinned, soaking up every single pained screams and malicious energy that started to grow.

He stopped in front of the main doors and decided on the one place he wanted to go. 

Mount Kunlun. 

The place that stood between the Dà Huāng and Tiandu. The one place that would make him free once he steps out. He disappeared in a swirl of red energy, appearing on the destination in mind. His bare feet touched the snowy caps of Mount Kunlun. The winter cold breeze cut through his thin robes but it didn’t deter him at all. It only made him excited even more. 

He took a step forward and another and another. Nothing was going to stop him. His hands dripped with blood and the gold bracelets continued to glow brightly. He grinned when he stood at the open courtyard, ready to head deeper in where the door to Dà Huāng laid.

“Zhu Yan, stop!”

A voice yelled at him from behind. A voice he knew in his blood lust mind. He slowly turned around, finding a group of demon hunters standing before him with their swords drawn out. 

How cute, he thought. More victims for him to claim and he grinned wildly. Anger hissed in his ears. His eyes sharpened into a deadly stare. He heard a few gasps when they saw his blood covered arms. But the one he listened to was a quiet breath and the wide eyes of the alpha in front of him.

Zhuo Yixuan stared at what stood in front of him. A vessel of malicious energy. The one vessel that had disappeared, who killed humans and yāos in that story and Zhuo Yixuan realized it was Zhu Yan.

The Zhu Yan he knew, whose smiles and teasing remarks were gone. 

“We have to subdue him,” his father said and Zhuo Yixuan nodded. “The binds on him are still intact and it's still restricting his powers.”

"It's the only thing holding him back?" Zhuo Yixuan asked.

His father nodded. "If he steps out of Mount Kunlun and into Dà Huāng, the binds will kill him but in this state, the best we can do is subduing him before we return home."

Zhu Yan isn’t fully free yet and Zhuo Yixuan wanted this night to end fast. He nodded, making hand gestures to the other hunters. They moved, protecting the two of them.

Zhuo Yixuan and his father made different hand gestures, pouring their cultivation into the spell to subdued Zhu Yan. The gold bracelets glowed brighter and a formation lit up around Zhu Yan. Gold inscriptions circled around Zhu Yan's arms, clamping it and gold chains shot out. It buried deep into the snowy floor and wrapped around the pillars.

The white ape yāo snarled at them. 

Zhuo Yixuan poured more of his cultivation power into the spell, hoping for Zhu Yan to fight back. The gold binds burned Zhu Yan’s skin but it didn’t stop him from grinning at them. 

Zhu Yan didn’t move from his spot. He didn't care that his arms hurt or that the humans in front of him were desperate to chain him. His eyes glowed a bright red.

A powerful force blasted around him, sending Zhuo Yixuan and everyone around flying backwards and landed on the floor. The spell broke. The chains shattered and fell into golden particles. The inscriptions dimmed and Zhu Yan stood taller with a gaze that looked down on them.

He casually walked past the fallen humans till he stopped in front of Zhuo Yixuan. He tilted his head like a curious animal, staring down at Zhuo Yixuan.

The scent of sandalwood and cedarwood invaded his senses, making Zhu Yan’s fingers twitch with a frown creasing his forehead. He seemed to hesitate when he kept staring at Zhuo Yixuan.

The air around them grew tensed curiosity. Zhu Yan's usual scent of peaches and apple blossoms took a different note. Something ashy and burning like fire and lava of a volcano.

“Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yixuan whispered and the white ape yāo’s fingers twitched again. “Zhu Yan, it's me.” 

Zhu Yan looked like he almost didn't want to harm Zhuo Yixuan and the alpha hoped the hesitation would last until the blood moon passed. He never thought this would happen.

Zhuo Yixuan slowly pushed himself up. His movements slow and cautious. He knew any movements would have a disaster happening.

Zhu Yan watched him with a sharp gaze that seemed to pierce through Zhuo Yixuan's soul. His eyes narrowed when Zhuo Yixuan stood up, standing still with a calm breath.

The omega yāo studied Zhuo Yixuan’s face, finding it familiar. His heart seemed to beat faster, wanting to be closer to the alpha that smells nice. Zhu Yan took a step forward, one hand reaching up to touch Zhuo Yixuan’s cheek.

Zhuo Yixuan held his breath, not daring to make a move in case Zhu Yan decides to kill him.

It was the most gentlest touch the white ape yāo has ever gave him. Zhu Yan caressed Zhuo Yixuan's cheek, letting his fingers trail down to his neck when Zhu Yan suddenly lurched forward.

Zhuo Yixuan glanced down to find the tip of a sword piercing Zhu Yan's shoulder. Zhuo Yixuan’s eyes widened. Oh no, Zhuo Yixuan thought, sensing the air changed from curiosity to anger.

Zhu Yan’s confused gaze instantly morphed into anger. The sword was pulled out and blood spilled onto his robes. He whirled around, grabbing his attacker around their neck.

They struggled against his grip, He felt their struggle, clawing at his wrist. He pulled them closer, finding the man staring wide eyed at him and Zhu Yan snapped their necks like a twig. He dropped the body casually and Zhuo Yixuan's eyes tracked the limp body.

"Father…" Zhuo Yixuan mumbled, feeling his eyes burned with tears at the eyes of his father staring lifelessly at him. He glanced up to find Zhu Yan looking at him, healing his own wound and the red energy cloaking him grew in thickness.

It was a sign and everyone around them yelled as one. They rushed towards Zhu Yan with swords drawn, ready to strike. 

“NO, STOP!” Zhuo Yixuan yelled at them. “Zhu Yan, don't!" He warned.

But it was too late. 

“Stop.” Zhu Yan muttered his spell and everyone’s hearts stopped.

Zhuo Yixuan felt the spell rippled through him. His body froze and his heart stilled like everyone's. He tipped forward like a puppet whose strings were cut. His fingers grazed Zhu Yan’s robes as he fell and his other hand held onto Yún Guāng Sword tightly, as a last fleeting hope.

Zhuo Yixuan’s eyes glazed over with death when his body landed on the snowy floor. He stared lifelessly into the distance, no longer seeing the mountains and snow falling. His life was taken away so easily, like a candle flame blowing out.

The crystal on Yún Guāng Sword glowed brightly before dimming into a clear crystal ornament again. 

~~~~~~

The blood moon passed, bringing its red haze away and pale silver moonlight cast over the snowy floor of Mount Kunlun. The red haze that covered Zhu Yan’s eyes faded along with the red energy covering him.

He blinked his eyes, finding his vision doubling before shaking his head to get rid of the daze he was in. His head hurts like a growing headache and his arms throbbed painful. His feet were cold and he shivered from either the cold or the exhaustion he felt.

“Mount Kunlun?" He mumbled, finally seeing where he was.

He’s unsure of what happened or how he even got here when he felt something trickled down his fingers. He glanced down finding blood staining his hands. His hands started to tremble and he looked around, freezing at the scattering of dead bodies before him.

His eyes widened at each body, finding their features familiar and one had eyes staring at him. Zhuo Yixuan and Zhuo Yichen's father laid dead before him in an awkward heap. He stumbled backwards, realizing what he had done when the back of his feet grazed against something cold and sharp. He looked down and sucked in a loud breath. 

The colours of the robes were familiar. Gold and white. Black hair spilled around and a thin layer of snow slowly settled on top of the body.

He slowly and carefully knelt down, gently turning the body over. He choked on his voice, unable to tear his gaze from Zhuo Yixuan’s eyes staring emptily at him. A cloudy film had glazed over in his eyes, completely devoid of any light or life.

Zhu Yan shook his head in denial, feeling tears burn his eyes. He couldn't talk and his mouth moved without sound. He managed to choke his words out.

“Xiao Xuan…no…please,” Zhu Yan begged, hands fluttering over Zhuo Yixuan’s body, unsure of what to do. “Please wake up…please.” 

He eventually picked Zhuo Yixuan up, cradling him close to his chest as he sat on the snow floor. Yún Guāng Sword fell from slack fingers.

Zhu Yan rocked on the spot, burying his nose in Zhuo Yixuan’s hair with the lingering scent of sandalwood and cedarwood clinging onto him. 

“Please, Xuan’er, please," he begged again. "No, I can fix this…I can fix it."

In a moment of clarity and slight delusion, he healed Zhuo Yixuan’s wounds; the lack of wounds would have been obvious but Zhu Yan was losing himself to the climbing grief.

He poured his energy into Zhuo Yixuan’s heart, hoping to restart it. He wanted to feel the strong heartbeat beating when he listens whenever he laid his head on Zhuo Yixuan’s chest. A sound he's come to slowly love over the months and years.

Nothing happened. There was no heart beating when he checked. He tried again and it stayed the same.

Grief gripped into him like the familiarity it was, sinking its claws deep in him. The first slide of tears made the emotions he wanted to deny, broke.

“No, no please, Xuan’er," he begged and when Zhuo Yixuan didn't respond, Zhu Yan spiralled into grief. "Wake up, please!” Zhu Yan screamed. “You promised to free me! You promised to break these binds! Don't fucking die on me.” He shook Zhuo Yixuan’s body and the alpha’s head lolled around like a broken toy. 

"Zhuo Yixuan!"

There was no response.

Zhuo Yixuan's head was tipped backwards like he was deep in sleep.

It dawned on Zhu Yan that the alpha was never going to wake up. He's never going to see that warm smile directed at him or hear the soft laughter. He won't be able to feel Zhuo Yixuan’s warmth and those arms wrapped around him.

He won't be able to play another game of Go again or tease him nor receive new pastries to try.

He won't get to feel those lips against his skin, laying his mark and making him shiver with desire. But most of all, he won't be able to escape from his glided cage.

“Xuan’er…” Zhu Yan whispered, pulling Zhuo Yixuan towards him and hugged him tightly with tears streaming down his cheeks. “I’m sorry.” 

Zhuo Yixuan's head landed on his shoulder and Zhu Yan screamed in pain.

His heart was shattered once more with the death of his betrothed alpha and he killed him.

~~~~~~

Zhu Yan doesn’t remember how he returned to the Zhuo mansion or back into Frost Pavilion. He doesn’t remember the feeling of heaviness of the golden bracelets on his wrists. He couldn't even feel the searing pain of the binds, trapping him forever in the room.  

Zhu Yan laughed at the his failed attempt of death. He laughed at himself that someone stopped him. They wanted him to live and his freedom was once again taken away.

Someone gave the orders and he felt like he knew who. But the grief that clouded his mind told him otherwise, that he deserved to be locked away. He watched the doors to his bedroom closed shut and the barrier was erected again, stronger and tighter.

His doors will never be opened again. 

He's trapped here forever. 

He’s never going to be free again. 

In a fit of anger and grief, he clawed his arms and body. He clawed at the golden bracelets, having his fingertips burn from the touch. He pulled hard on his hair, messing it up and strands were ripped from his scalp.

He screamed at every moving shadow and thrashed his room like a wild beast.

He ripped the pillows off his bed, throwing it onto the floor. He tipped the table over and the bowl of suppressants that should have subdued him, broke on the floor.

He laughed at everything. He laughed at himself for being deceived that he would be free. 

He laughed at his own life that he couldn't take. He laughed at the kindness the Zhuo brothers showed him and he laughed at his own heart for falling in love all over again.

Since being separated from Li Lun, losing his pups and finally the death of Zhuo Yixuan, Zhu Yan fell into a deeper pit of grief than he had before. 

He raised his arm with a cup in his hand. He wanted to smash it against the Go board sitting innocently but froze. The last game he played with Zhuo Yixuan sat unfinished.

He slowly lowered his arm, feeling tears burn his eyes. The cup slipped from his slack fingers, shattering into half by his feet.

Tears fell and he went to his bed with a staggering step. He fell onto his sheets, grabbing fistful of it. He pressed his nose into the sheets, hoping to feel a warmth he had lost.

He clung onto the sheets that smelt like Zhuo Yixuan. He kept the last pagoda flower gifted to him alive, preserving it with his own powers despite the small backlash he received.

He didn't care that the last thing Zhuo Yixuan gave to him was the pagoda flower after a case.

Human life was so very short and time is infinite.

Zhu Yan lost track of it. He sat by the veranda one day, dressed in his blood stained robes and dried blood flaked from his hands. He hasn't cleaned himself up, feeling lost in what to do next.

He leaned against the pillar of the veranda, blankly looking up at the morning sky. The day felt new but he was trapped in the same cycle as before.

He started to hum a children’s lullaby. He softly sang the lyrics before forgetting the next verse. He stopped singing. He doesn't remember the old words to the lullaby, only the tune. 

He starting humming the tune instead.

He watched the day passed by till he washed the blood away in the stream. He doesn't remember when he changed his clothes or burying it next to the grave of his dead pup.

He hummed the tune again, watching as the day moved on but he was forever chained to the room, never to be free forever.

Chapter Text

Dà Huāng, Li Lun thought, was both a home and a prison for many yāos. A place that some wanted to escape from, with how desolated it is while others never wanted to leave; him included.

But there is another feeling that goes further than wanting to escape. It's a grave. A kind of tomb that holds every emotion one felt. Life, hatred, love, grief, happiness and so on but majority was freedom.

Any yāos could run freely. Chase the clouds if they wanted too. Fly high above the trees or swim deep in the rivers and lakes.

Freedom also comes with a hefty price and Li Lun learnt it the hard way.

He was imprisoned in a single place that felt more like a grave than a home. But he knew no other place that was both familiar and foreign. Maybe he's forgotten what it was like to be free, to stretch his arms up and feel the open air in Dà Huāng.

He doesn't need much—truly—only the need to walk around freely like the roots of trees searching for water. He felt the same as that. Reaching, searching and grasping at anything even if it would destroys things. He shifted on the spot where he sat on the large stone slab.

It was cold and damp, something that he liked but now he felt the dampness sticking to his clothes. The truth was he doesn't have to stay in one place when Huaijing Valley has many caves he can move around. But the chains wrapped around his ankles and wrists were a hindrance to him.

Thick heavy chains glowed with inscriptions kept him in a single place. It made him resent the situation he was in with a low growl. A careful reminder of his own cage and he glared at it.

He’s been locked in his birth place. He felt the heavy chains dragged against the floor when he walked. It rattled like an annoying toy. He could have been able to break it but the Baize Token power was etched in the inscriptions, making it impossible to do so.

Li Lun sighed, leaning back against his perch. He closed his eyes, breathing in the scent of earth and dewdrops. It reminded him of when he first ventured out of his home.

He was but a little sapling born from the locust root. An old tree that bloomed flowers every year. When he first grew a conscious, he wanted to know what it was like to walk. To have a form that could explore the surface.

He was determined to grow and have his own body. He cultivated over the years—long and silent—perfecting his flow and energy till one day, he opened his eyes for the first time.

He felt heavy and dizzy, unused to what he was. He lifted his arms up, staring wide eyed at his hands with ten fingers. He wiggled them and his toes. It felt foreign to feel it move.

He touched his face, feeling his cheeks and lips. Sharp and soft. He explored his body with a new touch that he's never felt before. He shivered when he brushed his fingers over his clothed chest.

Very foreign, he thought, and dropped his arms by his side. Clothes felt strange on his skin but he didn't mind it at all.

Feelings were neutral. He never bothered to learn what emotions are or even understood it. He's a pagoda tree that doesn't feel, or so he thought.

A feeling bubbled up in his chest when he stared at his feet. Different and unsure. He wanted to know what it felt like to stand up.

He pushed himself up, standing on unsteady legs like a newborn, in one of the caves in Huaijing Valley.

White flowers hung above him, swaying gently from the light wind. The large tree that grew in the middle with roots dangling down, twisted and gnarled was reaching for the rushing yāo waters below. It felt like it was watching him, urging him to move.

His hand rested against the tree's trunk. The grooves of the bark was felt underneath his fingertips. It felt new and it was Li Lun's only single comfort and sturdy anchor.

He took a step forward, fumbling with swinging arms before falling back against the trunk. He huffed in annoyance. A few strands of hair fell into his face and he blew them off.

He glared at his feet, finding them useless and bothersome but he really wanted to feel what it was like to run in the open field.

He's heard the little chatter from the bird yāos that come to sit on the old tree branches, whispering about feeling the stones and dirt in their feet or the water yāos who would dip their bodies into the cool lake waters when they passed by. He even heard from the other beast yāos, talking about the best fruits to taste. It made Li Lun want to try it all, to experience it.

He tried again, pushing himself up. His legs shook but he grew determined. He took an unsteady step first, getting his balance right then took another step, putting one foot in front of the other till he was walking.

He managed to walk in a straight line, a triumph grin on his face. He spun around too fast, tripping over his own feet before falling backwards. He laid sprawled out on the ground. The leaves rustled like laughter and he stared up at the large hole in the ceiling where the top of the tree reached.

Freedom was just an arm's reach away and failure was not on Li Lun's list.

Over the weeks, Li Lun learnt to walk properly, stumbling around before gaining strength. It wasn't easy as it looked since his form is a tree.

The first time he stepped out of Huaijing Valley was the first he's ever felt excited. The skies were blue, the air smelt clean and rich with soil. Water flowed freely and he felt like a leaf fluttering in the wind. He followed his instincts, urging him to run.

His bare feet felt the gravel, digging into his soles but he didn't care. Not when he finally could breath the air and taste the cold fresh waters. He took a deep breath and ran.

He felt free, running through the open fields. His feet splashed water and his clothes fluttered behind him. He felt the wind in his hair and a large smile appeared on his face.

Li Lun grew to master his own powers, controlling roots and vines, growing little trees and saplings. He learnt how to change forms, inhibiting yāos. He grew his reputation too, becoming one of the Great Yāos and he presented as an alpha.

An alpha that carried the scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth, like the pagoda tree growing in his home.

He first met Ying Zhao with a curiosity burning in him when he climbed Mountain Kunlun. He's never seen snow before and the cold winds ruffled his long hair and robes. He walked through the hanging bridge with bells ringing.

He didn't seemed interested in it till he stood in the middle of an open courtyard and Ying Zhao greeted him with a kind smile.

"Hello," Ying Zhao greeted. "You must be new."

Li Lun peered behind Ying Zhao. Two yāos smiled widely, waking into the temple and disappeared. Ying Zhao noticed his curiosity.

He chuckled quietly. "If you have the Baize Token, you can leave to visit Tiandu," he explained.

Li Lun frowned like the words itself were foreign. Tiandu? Baize Token?

"Can you talk?" Ying Zhao kindly asked Li Lun, noticing the quietness from the alpha. He smiled widely, and stepped down to stand in front of Li Lun. "You must be young, very young."

Li Lun instinctively took a step back, narrowing his eyes at the man. The calm scent of tea tree and peppermint made his nose twitch but it pulled him in like the forest he explored not that long.

"I am Ying Zhao." Ying Zhao waited and Li Lun parroted after him.

"Yi…ng Zh...ao," Li Lun stumbled and Ying Zhao chuckled. He knew his name, having it being whispered by the pagoda tree and he tried to pronounce it. "Li…Luun…"

"Li Lun?" Ying Zhao said and Li Lun nodded. "Come little one. If you're going to want to explore Tiandu, you would first need to learn how to speak, read and write at most. Don't worry, it won't take you that long to master it."

~~~~~~

It took Li Lun less than six months to learn how to speak, read and write under Ying Zhao's guidance. The first time Li Lun went to Tiandu, he followed the Mountain God like a little disciple. He was dressed in robes of white in his first human disguise.

Black hair tied in a short half ponytail with a plain hairpin. His eyes were bright with wonder, carefully following Ying Zhao like a little duckling. But like a tree he is, he started to feel the crowd to be overwhelming and people kept brushing against him.

His wonder turned to dislike, inching away from people brushing against his arms. He ended up sticking closer to Ying Zhao and the older alpha noticed his distress.

Taking pity on Li Lun, Ying Zhao gently handed him a package of his purchase to carry. He pulled the younger alpha to his side, making sure Li Lun was close by and brought him to the quieter side of the busy market. Li Lun still held a slight wonder in his eyes but he figured he dislikes the crowd more than anything.

Eventually he grew used to it when Ying Zhao sent him for errands. The older alpha followed along to make sure the pagoda tree yāo would handle it without incident.

Li Lun left Mountain Kunlun when he learnt enough and grew tired of Tiandu. Ying Zhao chuckled, waving at him goodbye. Li Lun would visit Ying Zhao every month for tea and each time he would bring a different kind of fruit he discovered as a gift.

When his rut came, he went into hiding in Huaijing Valley, in the tree where he built a hanging nest of vines and soft mosses. His scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth thickened and his cock hardened till it wept with precum. He curled into himself, panting and shivered with an ache he never knew he had.

His rut ended and he felt exhausted for the first time, curling in his nest to sleep. He visited Ying Zhao with his scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth. A couple of omegas lingering in the courtyard seemed interested in him.

Tall, dark and alluring as they whispered to each other. Ying Zhao was amused with how Li Lun seemed uninterested in them. The young alpha never seemed to be searching for a mate, brushing off any advances or he'll wrinkle his nose at their sickly sweet scent.

A snarl and they would back off. He was unapproachable and omegas grew scared of him from both his status and reputation.

"Are you not interested in them?" Ying Zhao asked Li Lun, pouring tea for the pagoda tree yāo. "They seemed to be very interested in you."

"Why would I be interested in them?" Li Lun asked back, frowning at the teacup. "Their scents are too sweet."

"Are you truly not interested in finding a mate?"

Li Lun sipped on his tea, frowning deeper and thought of his answer. He's never thought of finding someone to settle down. Someone who wouldn't be in awe with his status or use him to grow their own reputation.

"No," Li Lun answered immediately. "They'll just end up using me as a stepping stone for their own gain."

Ying Zhao chuckled, nodding along. "That is understandable but when you do find the one, you'll know."

"How would I know?"

"If their scent is pleasing to you, doesn't irritate you or as you say, sickly sweet, you'll know. Scent is always important for us and your instinct would let you know too."

Li Lun took it as it is, sipping on his tea and spent the rest of the time learning new things from Ying Zhao or borrowing a new book to practice reading.

Over the years, his life was always the same. Lesser yāos quiver before him, flinching from his great power or cold gaze. He explored Dà Huāng with his dark blue and black robes trailing behind him. He climbed the highest mountain top, looking at everything with a gaze that seemed bored and half interested.

He walked along the stone beach, listening to the crashing waves when he smelt the most delightful sweet scent he's ever smelt before. He smelt peaches and apple blossoms that was hidden beneath dirt and leaves.

Sweet like a fruit and flowery like flowers blossoming in spring.

He was intrigued.

An omega was disguising themselves as an alpha.

He followed the scent like a moth to a flame. He stepped round a large stone, walking on the edge of the sea shore when he saw him.

Li Lun stopped in his tracks. His eyes drank in the sight of the omega standing in front of him, watching the waves too. Red wine hair fluttered in the breeze with a half bun at the back. The omega was dressed in black cotton thread robes, giving him the look of a poorer yāo but Li Lun can sense the great power emitting from him.

The omega sensed him and slowly turned to see. Almond shaped red eyes stared at him before narrowing in discontent. A low snarl came from the omega and he turned away with a flick of his sleeve.

Li Lun watched him leave with only the scent of peaches and apple blossoms in the air, faint and light. He didn't chase or stopped the omega. He simply let him leave.

He thought he won't see the omega again when he stumbled upon him one day. Li Lun was tending to a peach tree where the sweetest peaches grew. He was harvesting a few for Ying Zhao when he smelt the scent again.

He peered over the branch he was sitting on, finding the omega studying the peach hanging from above. Li Lun watched him silently, hiding his presence.

The omega flicked his fingers where the fingertips were glowing red. The peach landed perfectly into the omega's waiting hand and Li Lun watched him scent the fruit first before taking a bite.

Sweet juices dribbled down his arm and the omega licked a long strip, savouring the sweet juice. He left with a quiet him, a small smile graced his features and Li Lun liked the smile.

Li Lun thinks the universe is pulling them together. They found themselves crossing paths more often than it wasn't much of a coincidence. The omega would snarl at him, pretending to be an alpha and walked away with his head held high.

Li Lun wasn't fooled, smiling slightly at the display. He didn't realized that he would seek for the omega's scent, wanting more of it or being found by the omega instead. It ended up becoming a game of hide and seek between them and Li Lun found it amusing.

He learnt of the omega's name from Ying Zhao.

Zhu Yan.

Li Lun felt it fitted the omega quite well. Ying Zhao noticed Li Lun's interested look and chuckled quietly. He didn't questioned either, preferring to let Li Lun discover it himself.

Li Lun finally understood what Ying Zhao meant. His inner alpha was pleased to sense Zhu Yan or when they met by accident. It didn't disgust him or annoyed him from Zhu Yan's scent and presence.

The first time he fought with Zhu Yan was on the same place they first met. Rings of power burst forth, sending stones flying and water rippling. The land shook and yāos would run from the strength of it.

Li Lun managed to topple Zhu Yan down, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulled Zhu Yan close to his side. His inner alpha rumbled with pleasure.

The sweet scent bloomed and Li Lun wanted to capture the scent, keeping it in a bottle so he could breath in whenever he wanted. But he liked the blush that grew on Zhu Yan's pale cheeks.

Zhu Yan's blush deepened further and he pushed the alpha away. He turned around before leaving hurriedly with an embarrassed scent.

Li Lun felt the lingering warmth in his arm and how it felt right to hold Zhu Yan. He wanted that feeling again and he sighed softly to himself. He left as well, returning in exploring Dà Huāng again.

He met Zhu Yan by chance at the desolated white tower. It felt cold and lonely and Zhu Yan stood in the middle of it. Li Lun made his presence known by purposely making his scent stronger. Zhu Yan slowly turned around, blinking at him in surprise.

"Oh, Li Lun," Zhu Yan greeted and Li Lun held back a shiver. It sounded right to hear Zhu Yan call him.

"Zhu Yan," Li Lun greeted in return and he watched Zhu Yan bite his bottom lip to prevent himself from making noises.

Good, I'm not the only one affected then, Li Lun thought, climbing up the stairs to stand next to Zhu Yan.

"What is this place?" Zhu Yan asked, turning his attention back to the tower.

"White Tower. It's been like this since the dark ages," Li Lun explained. "No one comes here."

Zhu Yan nodded. "It would be a waste for it to be left like this."

"It would," Li Lun agreed and Zhu Yan turned to him with a glimmer in his eyes—something Li Lun learnt later was to be taken seriously.

"I don't know any other Great Yāo besides you," Zhu Yan said, gaining Li Lun's full attention. "And if this place was rebuilt, wouldn't it be fun to meet here?"

It was the start of everything for Li Lun and they rebuilt White Tower together. It was the first place Li Lun fell for Zhu Yan hard.

~~~~~~

Li Lun grew to love Zhu Yan as they courted each other. He's heard of alpha courting their partners with gifts of flowers and food, to show their desire and ability to care. But he doesn't follow the rules. He presented a white bottle with green swirl pattern on the body to Zhu Yan. The omega looked confused by it, taking the bottle with a cautious look.

"It's Yāo waters from Huaijing Valley," Li Lun said, watching Zhu Yan's eyes widened with realization. "This is my gift to you. I know you don't need flowers or food or any sort thing. Between us is equality and understanding, am I right, Zhu Yan?"

Zhu Yan held the bottle carefully. He clutched it to his chest and nodded. A faint blush had bloomed on his cheeks and Li Lun leaned down to press a kiss to Zhu Yan's cheek. The soft gasp and Zhu Yan's wide eyes made him cuter in Li Lun's eyes.

Over the years of their courting, little gifts grew in their own little treasure and Li Lun loved each one of it. He kept the little trinkets Zhu Yan brought for him in a wooden box.

As courting mates, it was common for them to help each other during their cycles and Li Lun adored the sight of Zhu Yan begging for more underneath his touch. It was a beautiful sight of him, seeing red wine hair spilled over the edges of the nest, legs parted open for Li Lun and a pretty mouth gasping with moans and cries of pleasure.

Li Lun was brought to a hot spring pool by Zhu Yan after his heat ended. The pool was hidden from anyone, isolated and quiet. It sat deep in the forest, something Li Lun had discovered before but left it alone.

The omega stood in front of the pool, slowly stripping himself from his robes. He dropped it by the edge, looking over his shoulder to tease Li Lun and stepped into the pool.

A soft sigh and Zhu Yan groaned as his muscles relaxed from the comforting heat. Li Lun huffed an amused sigh, sipping on the flask of water but never took his eyes off from Zhu Yan. The white ape yāo threaded the water lightly, pouring handful of water over his shoulders and arms. He turned around, tilting his head to the side where Li Lun left deep kiss marks on Zhu Yan's neck. Purple bruises littered his neck like a necklace and Li Lun felt his cock twitched in interest but he held himself back.

Zhu Yan grinned when he smelt pagoda flowers and fresh earth tinged with arousal. He crooked his finger in a come motion. Li Lun sighed loudly, putting the flask away and stood up in a flourish of robes. He dropped his clothes easily, letting his full body come into view.

Li Lun saw Zhu Yan swallowed hard, drinking in the sight of Li Lun's sculpted body. Water climbed up against Li Lun's body when he dipped himself into the water. He purposely made his way slowly, letting his hair trail behind him like a black stream until he stood in front of Zhu Yan.

Zhu Yan had to look away to hide his blush. Li Lun chuckled, wrapping an arm around Zhu Yan's waist and pulled him close to his front. He brought them to sit by the edge, holding and soaking in the hot water and Zhu Yan relaxed in his hold. It was just the two of them and Li Lun enjoyed the feel of Zhu Yan in his arms.

Their bath was done and Zhu Yan did something Li Lun never expected to receive. Zhu Yan's prize skill, the Truth Eye. Li Lun wanted his gift to Zhu Yan to be special after the white ape yāo had given him. The most priceless gift Li Lun has ever received and Zhu Yan gave it to him so easily.

The white ape yāo grinned at his stunned look and Li Lun left him for a few days with a kiss to Zhu Yan's cheek and a robe draped over his shoulders. Zhu Yan was buried in Li Lun's scent and outer robe, making the pagoda tree yāo rumble in delight.

He searched for a perfect gift, something to match Zhu Yan's gift. He knew nothing could match the gift and Li Lun felt he had to make it on par or so.

He found what he wanted in a land with cracks all around. He crouched down, examining the cracks when he found green stones lining in the cracks. He knew what it was, having heard in whispers in Tiandu whenever he followed Ying Zhao down.

Jade.

He doesn't need much, placing his hand on top of the plate and poured in some power, enough to break a square shaped jade stone. His fingers gripped the edge and he pulled it out carefully. He held the jade in his palm, the size of a rough square, examining the colours in it.

A deep green that reminded Li Lun of the dark forests leaves with swirls of lavender, white and green in the mix. It was beautiful, reminding him of Zhu Yan that was a mix of all.

Li Lun grinned to himself, clutching onto the jadeite with eagerness. He left the place with his prize, heading straight back to Huaijing Valley in a swirl of pagoda leaves.

He set to work; designing, moulding, and carving the jadeite into bracelet. He carved his and Zhu Yan's yāo marks into the body, making sure to show the design for anyone to see.

He held the finished bracelet up, feeling proud of himself of the design. He left his home in search for Zhu Yan, following the scent of peaches and apple blossoms. He found his omega waiting by the Dianmu Divine Tree, tending to it like how they do together.

Zhu Yan perked up when he scented Li Lun's scent, spinning on the spot with a wide smile, still wearing Li Lun's outer robe like his own.

"Li Lun!" Zhu Yan excitedly exclaimed, rushing towards the approaching alpha and threw his arms around Li Lun's neck. "You're here. Welcome back."

Li Lun's breath stuttered for a moment but he returned the hug tightly. "Mhm, I'm home," he said softly and Zhu Yan chuckled. "Give me your left wrist."

Zhu Yan pulled back with a puzzled look but placed his hand into Li Lun's. Li Lun pulled the jade bracelet out, carefully slipping it on and he heard Zhu Yan's breath hitched when he pulled his fingers away.

The bracelet sat nicely on Zhu Yan's wrist and Li Lun liked that it fitted his omega. He brought Zhu Yan's arm up and pressed a kiss to the fluttering pulse and scent gland. The sweet taste of peaches and apple blossoms bloomed on his lips and he missed the scent so much.

It felt right and Li Lun found something worth keeping. He brushed Zhu Yan's hair from his face, tucking it behind an ear and pulled him close for a kiss. Zhu Yan eagerly returned the kiss, moaning softly before nuzzling Li Lun's neck with a pleased sigh.

Li Lun brought Zhu Yan to meet Ying Zhao for the first time. He felt the omega's nervousness and tightened his grip on Zhu Yan's hand reassuringly. He presented Zhu Yan as his courting mate and waited for the older alpha to refute or something but received a chuckle and a pleased smile.

Li Lun could never hide anything from Ying Zhao.

They were invited for tea and Zhu Yan looked around the temple with fascinated eyes. Li Lun watched him with a pleased air and Ying Zhao chose not to comment about it.

Zhu Yan pestered Ying Zhao with questions of the knowledge the older god knew and Li Lun enjoyed the sight of Zhu Yan's curiosity burning more and more.

"Ah Li Lun," Ying Zhao called as they were leaving. "I would need your assistance for tomorrow. It's time to restock the shelves," he smiled.

Li Lun nodded. "Restock?" Zhu Yan questioned. "From where? Dà Huāng has nearly everything that you need."

Ying Zhao chuckled. "It does but there's some things only Tiandu has that we can get from."

"Tiandu? Li Lun, what's Tiandu?" Zhu Yan asked, turning his attention to his mate and Li Lun looked unsure if he wanted to tell him or not.

"The human realm," Li Lun answered after Zhu Yan prodded him. "Tiandu is a place in the human realm. But you can't enter it without the Baize Token."

"But you don't have the token, do you?" Zhu Yan asked again.

"No, I don't but I'm given a temporarily sign when I leave with Ying Zhao."

"Can I come?"

Li Lun shot him a look. His answer was on the tip of his tongue when Ying Zhao beat him to it.

"More hands are much better than this little tree," Ying Zhao said, smiling warmly at Li Lun's narrowed look.

Zhu Yan smiled widely. He squeezed Li Lun's grip in a reassuring grip and it was the first time Li Lun saw Zhu Yan's human form. Red wine hair was transformed into silver hair. His red eyes changed into a brown colour. It reminded Li Lun of tree barks warming in the sun.

Zhu Yan stood waiting for Li Lun when the omega yāo stepped out in white robes—the same as Li Lun's—and his hair was loose. Zhu Yan spun around on the spot, showing off his new human form.

"Do I look human enough?" Zhu Yan asked and Li Lun lifted a lock of silver hair.

"Needs something," Li Lun said, pressing a kiss to Zhu Yan's hair and the omega yāo flushed red.

Li Lun pulled out a string of pom poms and made Zhu Yan turned around. "This would be a sign that you are a disciple from Mount Kunlun. We'll get a token before we leave also," he explained, braiding Zhu Yan's hair with the pom poms.

Zhu Yan stood quietly, waiting for Li Lun to finish. He fiddled with his sleeves and felt the braid fall nicely on his back. He gently touched the braid, pulling it over his shoulder to see.

He smiled softly at Li Lun's handiwork and nodded in thanks. He took in Li Lun's human form and found the pagoda tree yāo to be even more handsome than before.

They both received the token, a glowing gold stamp on their hand and Zhu Yan stared at it in fascination. Li Lun made sure he had a tight grip on Zhu Yan's hand, feeling the jade bracelet against his skin.

They dutifully followed Ying Zhao, carrying the packages until a human alpha approached Zhu Yan with stuttering words. Li Lun narrowed his eyes at the alpha, disliking the scent of fresh grass and soil. Li Lun almost growled in warning and Zhu Yan's smile was small but tight. The human alpha gave Zhu Yan a flower, red carnation with a blush on his face.

The carnation was placed in Zhu Yan's hand before the omega was pulled away by Li Lun. They left without a word and Zhu Yan stumbled behind Li Lun. The scent of an angry alpha was easily detected and Ying Zhao knew something had happened. But the incident was not the first for them later on.

The times Zhu Yan managed to drag Li Lun to visit Tiandu, the omega was flocked by all kinds of alphas or people in general. It made Li Lun displeased by it, tightening his hands into fists and watched as Zhu Yan received gifts. Li Lun huffed with anger, flicking his sleeves and walked away. It was the first time he left Zhu Yan alone and the omega ran after him hurriedly.

"Li Lun, wait," Zhu Yan cried out but Li Lun only walked fast. "Wait!"

Li Lun turned down the dirt path, heading up for Mountain Kunlun. He heard Zhu Yan chase after him with cries of his name. His inner alpha urged him to stop, to wait for his omega but the image of other alphas' handing Zhu Yan gifts made Li Lun's mood sour. He climbed up the stairs, walking past Ying Zhao who waited for them and Zhu Yan quickly handed Ying Zhao the packages.

"Li Lun! Oh for heaven's sake, stop right there!" Zhu Yan yelled but Li Lun continued to move. "Freeze."

Li Lun's legs froze, forcing him to stumble forward. Zhu Yan caught up to him but Li Lun managed to break through Zhu Yan's one word spell. He growled low at Zhu Yan, shoving him back and disappeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves.

"Li Lun!"

~~~~~~

Li Lun knew he was jealous. He was displeased by the fact that other alphas, humans or not, could easily snatch Zhu Yan away from him. Is it because he hasn't claimed the omega as his? Is it because Zhu Yan was beautiful in both forms that no one could tear their eyes away from him?

It made something sour in Li Lun's stomach, curling in his nest in Huaijing Valley. He took to hiding from Zhu Yan, sensing the white ape yāo looking for him. He was stubborn, preferring to hide away from the problem instead of addressing it. He left his nest after he a few days and felt his inner alpha was agitated for not having seen Zhu Yan in awhile.

He sat underneath the Dianmu Divine Tree, feeling the old tree pulse in greeting. The comforting feel of the tree's power was welcoming and it calmed something in him. He heard approaching footsteps and felt a head rest on his shoulder. His tensed shoulders sank down in greeting and he sighed softly. He glanced over to find Zhu Yan fiddling with the jade bracelet.

Li Lun felt he was harsh, pushing Zhu Yan away in a fit of jealousy. They talked and Zhu Yan made it known that only he was the alpha Zhu Yan wanted. It was that moment, when they kissed, that Li Lun wanted Zhu Yan to be his omega. If he's going to have other alphas lusting over Zhu Yan, he's going to make it very known that Zhu Yan belonged to him, only him.

A week or so, Li Lun's rut started. Zhu Yan was with him, helping him for this cycle. It was a gorgeous sight to see Zhu Yan naked and whining for him. The omega yāo rode Li Lun's hard cock with vigour. Zhu Yan's sweet cries and moans filled Li Lun's home. They were in Li Lun's hanging nest in Huaijing Valley. Zhu Yan threw his head back, arching his back when Li Lun's hot hands roamed all over Zhu Yan's body.

Zhu Yan keened in pleasure. It made Li Lun's cock throbbed hard in Zhu Yan's stuffed cunt. He grasped Zhu Yan's hips, pulling him down in time of thrusting up before rolling them over in the soft nest. Zhu Yan grabbed the blanket underneath. A low strangled noise was made by Zhu Yan and Li Lun groaned at the sound. He snapped his hips hard, pulling Zhu Yan down along and it felt good.

Pleasure was racing in their veins. The sound of their voices bouncing off the stone walls and Li Lun's tree was the only witness to their coupling. Zhu Yan cried out in a high pitched tone when Li Lun's knot began to grow. They've done this many times for their cycle, but each time felt new and nerve jolting.

Li Lun loved the sight of Zhu Yan's back. He leaned down, trailing a wet tongue against the ridges of Zhu Yan's back. He gripped the back of Zhu Yan's neck, shoving the omega down and pulled his hips higher to fuck Zhu Yan's cunt. Loud wet squelching along with skin slapping skin as Li Lun picked up in rhythm. His hips stuttered when he reached his orgasm. His knot caught in Zhu Yan's cunt, spreading it open to accommodate for his size and he groaned when his cock pulsed with cum.

Zhu Yan moaned between Li Lun's name and alpha. Li Lun breathed hard, releasing Zhu Yan's neck to hold his waist and rolled them over to be in a comfortable spot. The action made Li Lun's knot went in deeper followed by a twitch and a spurt of hot cum. He heard Zhu Yan moaned, curling till his back was pressed against Li Lun's chest.

The alpha pulled him closer and Li Lun brushed Zhu Yan's hair from his nape. He found what he was looking for and buried his nose into Zhu Yan's scent gland. Peaches and apple blossoms was heavenly mixed with pagoda flowers and fresh earth was divine. Li Lun couldn't get enough of the scent and he wanted more. He pushed his nose further, hoping to draw out another deep scent. His fingers brushed the underside of Zhu Yan's chin, feeling the scar beneath his finger pads.

He's seen the scar whenever Zhu Yan throws his head back. The omega yāo would shrug when Li Lun asked about it. Zhu Yan doesn't remember how he got it and Li Lun left it but Zhu Yan never liked when Li Lun touched the scar. He figured it was something about Zhu Yan's past and he pulled Zhu Yan tighter.

He was brought back to the warmth in his arms when Zhu Yan pressed against his knot. Li Lun softly groan, letting another burst of cum into Zhu Yan before pressing a kiss to Zhu Yan's nape. The awaited question that he's been wanting to ask.

Li Lun felt nervous and excited. He wanted to see Zhu Yan as his mate and he hoped the omega yāo would feel the same. They've spent many years courting each other. They knew what the other liked and disliked. They knew a few of their secrets and the exchanged of the priceless gifts they gave each other was more than enough. They've looked for a place to live together too, in areas that felt hidden and isolated just for them.

"Be my mate," Li Lun whispered and he felt Zhu Yan froze in his hold.

His heart beat loudly in his ears. He's never felt so scared in his life before. The question that hung above them, avoiding from asking when they were waiting for each other to be ready. Li Lun would respect Zhu Yan's decision if the omega rejected him. He would return Zhu Yan's gift and leave him alone. It would take awhile to mend his broken heart for trees will remember the hurt.

"Yes," Zhu Yan whispered and Li Lun felt the air leave his lungs.

It was everything Li Lun wanted and he kissed Zhu Yan deeply like his life depended on it.

They moved into their new home that Zhu Yan had chosen. A cave that was big and deep but felt airy in some ways. Li Lun set their things down, exploring it while Zhu Yan smiled like he had won. There was a forest that lead to many paths hidden for them to explore. Trees with wild fruits growing for Zhu Yan to eat to his hearts content and a stream that ran not far from the cave.

Natural light spilled into the cave making it bright and warm. Zhu Yan wrapped his arms around Li Lun's waist, grinning when Li Lun didn't reject the place immediately like before. It was perfect for them and Li Lun turned in Zhu Yan's hold to kiss him.

They slowly made the cave their own. A fire hearth was made, filling the cave with warmth and light. They would sit by the entrance of the cave, looking at the night sky where stars dotted the background. The moon was bright, casting a silvery glow onto the waters and Li Lun found it peaceful. Zhu Yan was pressed up to his side, wrapped in a warm blanket with Li Lun's arm draped over his shoulders.

Li Lun looked down to find Zhu Yan peering up at him. The omega yāo smiled sweetly and Li Lun rested his cheek on top of Zhu Yan's head. A soft purred was heard and Li Lun returned the purr with his own rumble. They were happy and content.

The night of a new moon, their cycles synced up. It was then that Li Lun claimed Zhu Yan as his mate in their nest that Zhu Yan built.

He sunk his hard cock into Zhu Yan's slick cunt. Moans left their parted lips when they were joined. Li Lun set a pace for them, thrusting his hips in a rhythmic tone. It drove his cock deeper into Zhu Yan's cunt. Little gasps and mewls filled the cave. It drove Li Lun mad and his cock grew thicker, making Zhu Yan gasped in shock and spread his legs wider.

Li Lun grunted when he wanted to go harder. He did. He fucked Zhu Yan hard and deep. Squelching, wet and filthy, combined with Zhu Yan's cries filled their cave. It made Li Lun shiver like everyone could hear there was an alpha claiming an omega in deep passion. The new moon watched them sink their fangs into their swollen scent glands and a bond was formed.

Li Lun felt the bond in him. It connected to his inner alpha and he felt it rumble and purr—something he didn't think was possible. He released Zhu Yan's scent gland, licking the blood away and moaned when Zhu Yan did the same. They both felt their passion and heat, jolting them in surprise.

Li Lun grinned and Zhu Yan laughed.

They were united, claimed as mates and it showed when it healed.

Li Lun didn't grow jealous when other alphas or omegas looked at Zhu Yan's neck. He knows they could never take Zhu Yan away from him. A mated mark was sacred and Li Lun wrapped an arm around Zhu Yan's waist, feeling proud and happy. Zhu Yan felt his emotions and elbowed Li Lun but Li Lun felt Zhu Yan's excitement too.

After all they are mates and being one meant they had an additional one too. Li Lun has never thought much of pups. He never thought he would be a father either when he learnt of Zhu Yan's pregnancy.

Li Lun found Zhu Yan vomiting behind a tree near their home one day. He had felt his omega's distress through the bond and went looking for him. Li Lun grew worried when he found Zhu Yan's pale face, catching the omega when he was done.

"I've got you," Li Lun whispered, brushing Zhu Yan's hair from his sweaty face. "Shh, I have you."

A soft whine and Li Lun carefully carried Zhu Yan back into their nest. He cleaned Zhu Yan up, wiping his lips and dabbing his face with a clean washcloth and fresh cool waters. Zhu Yan slept in their nest, feeling ill and tired. Li Lun grew even more worried when Zhu Yan didn't get better over the weeks and he sought out Ying Zhao's help.

The old alpha ushered them in, laying a thicker cloak on Zhu Yan's shivering shoulders. The omega thanked him with a tight smile before quickly leaving again for another round of sickness. Li Lun followed, holding him tightly and soothed Zhu Yan with his scent. When they returned—shuffling slowly to not upset Zhu Yan's stomach—they found a pot of ginger tea and ginger candy.

"It's alright," Ying Zhao chuckled, pouring a cup for Zhu Yan. "I can smell the changes in your scent, Zhu Yan. You're pregnant."

Zhu Yan's eyes widened and Li Lun looked confused. Ying Zhao chuckled again.

"You didn't even noticed your own mate's scent changed," he chided Li Lun who gaped for a moment. "Seems like you'll be having a little one joining you."

Zhu Yan turned to Li Lun with tears in his eyes. Li Lun could only nod, feeling unsure while Zhu Yan sipped on his ginger tea. He grabbed Li Lun's hand, shaking in excitement and nervousness.

They are both going to be parents and Li Lun was the one who is most afraid of all. He knew nothing about pups or beast yāo's pregnancies. He only knew how to care for trees and plants, never a creature with legs.

Zhu Yan sensed his feelings through the bond and sent a wave of warmth to him. Li Lun took a deep breath, sending warmth and reassurance in return. They listened carefully to Ying Zhao's instructions and the old alpha waved them goodbye.

Li Lun took care of Zhu Yan with tenderness and attentive. He watched as each week went by and Zhu Yan's abdomen swelled with their growing pup. The little movements shocked Li Lun when he felt a little hand pressed against his. His willow shaped eyes were wide, looking at Zhu Yan with disbelief and awe. He cradled his mate close in their nest, keeping Zhu Yan warm and comfortable.

When Li Lun thought Zhu Yan was asleep, he would hummed a soft lullaby to their unborn pup, caressing Zhu Yan's skin with tenderness. Li Lun pressed a kiss to Zhu Yan's head, scenting the new scent Zhu Yan wore.

Milk, honey, peaches and apple blossoms mixed with Li Lun's scent.

It made Li Lun rumble in content, easing Zhu Yan into an easy sleep.

The day of their pup being born, Li Lun had to be strong and steady for Zhu Yan. Each pained cry that tore from Zhu Yan's lips, made Li Lun's heart ached. Unlike humans who had midwives to help the birth, yāos trust in their instincts and mates for guidance.

Li Lun would help Zhu Yan shuffle around the cave, to help with the contractions and fed Zhu Yan sips of water. The omega yāo cursed at Li Lun but it did nothing to deter the alpha away. After all, this was their pup.

Zhu Yan whimpered and cried in pain with each contraction until Li Lun helped him down and stripped him from his clothes. Zhu Yan was propped up against the nest walls with a blanket underneath him.

It was time.

Li Lun's steady voice guided Zhu Yan in what to do, remembering Ying Zhao's instructions. Each push was hard and Li Lun stood strong for Zhu Yan. Sweat dripped down their faces and the fire crackled behind them on a spring night.

Their daughter was finally born, crying her lungs out and Li Lun was quick to wrap her in soft blankets. He quickly tied the umbilical cord with a vine and neatly cut it with a hot blade.

His daughter cried and Zhu Yan's tired laughter joined. Li Lun's arms were drenched in blood and birth fluids but he felt proud and happy to see their daughter. A little thing that was their world and Li Lun didn't know he could love both Zhu Yan and his daughter.

His little blossom as they called her. They would give her a proper name when she was older but for now she was known as their little blossom—Xiao Hua. She was everything to Li Lun.

He rocked her in her arms, letting Zhu Yan sleep after a hard night of trying to feed her when she was a few weeks old.

"You really are like your mother," Li Lun commented softly, watching her blink her eyes—the same as his—and gurgled happily. "Really a menace."

She smiled at him before becoming fussy for food. Li Lun sat down by the table with a bowl of warm goat's milk that Li Lun bought from Tiandu. He gently spooned the milk into Xiao Hua's mouth, watching her eat eagerly. He huffed at her when she finished the small bowl and burped her to slowly rock her to sleep. She yawned cutely, snuggling into the blanket and Li Lun hummed the lullaby to her.

He laid her in the nest, next to Zhu Yan. He sat by the nest, watching them sleep with a content look. The same look he had when Zhu Yan woke up. His mate smiled sleepily at him before checking on their pup.

"She ate already," Li Lun told Zhu Yan, helping him to sit up and handed him a slice of peach he harvested. "A menace like you."

Zhu Yan rolled his eyes, eating the peach slice. "She has your eyes," Zhu Yan said softly. "Something I adore the most on her."

They adored their little pup. Li Lun was always by her side, never taking his eyes off her. Zhu Yan commented on how protective he is and Li Lun shot him a look. Their Xiao Hua tried to speak when she was old enough to learn and both of them were eager to here her first words.

"Say mama," Zhu Yan urged, smiling at her. "Come on, say mama."

"I doubt she'll say mama as her first word," Li Lun commented. "Baba might be it."

Zhu Yan shot him a look. "And who was it that carried her till she was born?" He said and Li Lun knew he could never win that argument.

"Buuuuu," Xiao Hua cooed, giggling at her mother.

"Mama. Come on, my Xiao Hua. Say mama."

"Baba," she said and Zhu Yan's mouth fell open in shock.

Li Lun burst out laughing, hearing their little blossom call him.

"Baba, babababababa," she repeated, bouncing on her spot and Zhu Yan never felt betrayed by his own pup.

"I have been betrayed by my own pup," Zhu Yan whined and Li Lun snickered.

"Mama," she said next and Zhu Yan perked up.

"My little bǎobè," he cooed, picking her up and squeezing her tight to his chest.

Over the years, Xiao Hua grew up, seeking for Li Lun for any help and mischief but she would run to her mother more often. She was loved by them.

Li Lun loved her so much, gifting her a handmade token with both Zhu Yan's and his yāo marks as the design. She cooed in delight, gently touching the token.

"Baba, put it on," she said, bouncing on the spot eagerly. "Baba please."

He could never deny her. He tied it around her belt, watching it dangled against her clothes. The token was made out of jade in lavender colour. It suited her well. Li Lun pressed kisses to her chubby cheek and she giggled loudly, hugging him until everything was taken away.

~~~~~~

Li Lun will never forget that moment. The moment it all tore him and Zhu Yan apart.

Xiao Hua had gone off playing by the river and it was the only time Li Lun took his eyes off from her. He knew the forest was safe. The whole area was safe since they cast protection spells around and a barrier to keep her safe. But it all fell apart when she disappeared from them.

"Where's Xiao Hua?" Zhu Yan asked, returning from collecting water by the stream and Li Lun frowned at him.

"Is she not with you?" Li Lun asked. "She said she was going to find you by the river."

"I didn't…see her…" Zhu Yan said and his eyes slowly grew wide.

Li Lun felt his heart beat fast in fear. He felt Zhu Yan's fear through the bond as well. They took off looking for her, yelling her name out before meeting back at home.

"How could you lose her!?" Zhu Yan yelled at Li Lun. "You never took your eyes off her!"

"I saw her headed for the river where you were," Li Lun shot back. "I knew you were there."

"But she didn't come!" Zhu Yan screamed, breath coming out short like he couldn't breathe. "She didn't! I didn't see her. I thought she was with you. How could you let her go like that!? How could you!?"

"Zhu Yan!" Li Lun grabbed his mate's shoulders, shaking him when he felt Zhu Yan's hyperventilating breaths. "Breathe. Just breathe."

Zhu Yan nodded his head. Worry and fear was spilling through the bond and Li Lun pulled him into a tight embrace. He felt Zhu Yan grasped his robes tightly, sucking in air and his scent before the emotions slowly subsided.

"Keep looking for her. I'll ask Ying Zhao if she went to him. We both know she knows how to use the teleportation spell," Li Lun said and Zhu Yan nodded. "We'll find her."

Li Lun left in a swirl of pagoda leaves, landing in front of Ying Zhao. The old alpha startled in shock till he took notice of Li Lun's distressed look. It was easy to spot Xiao Hua by the black and blue robes Li Lun and Zhu Yan dressed her up. She wore a little red ribbon in her black hair with a blossom clip. He knew her scent would be theirs and Li Lun didn't see her in Mountain Kunlun.

"Li Lun, what's wrong?" Ying Zhao asked, sensing Li Lun's agitated scent. "Is everything okay with Zhu Yan and Xiao Hua?"

"She's gone," Li Lun blurted out. "Did she come here?"

Ying Zhao looked alarm as well. "She's not here. I would have known and would have brought her back to you."

Li Lun swallowed hard and nodded. He left, searching for his pup in places he knew. He looked everywhere. Every forest, stream and cave. He looked in mountains and even in Huaijing Valley and Zhu Yan's cave.

There was no sign of their daughter.

He returned home empty handed and so did Zhu Yan. It was the first heated fight they've had in so long and Li Lun took off again, searching for her. He would not stop till he found her.

He didn't expect to feel Zhu Yan's agony pain through the bond. It staggered him in his steps. The immense pain and grief that flooded him. He knew something was wrong and he immediately went to where Zhu Yan is.

He wasn't expecting to see his mate sitting by the river and holding their daughter's limp body with an arrow pierced through her chest. Zhu Yan's agonized screams echoed in the air and Li Lun stumbled towards them with trembling fingers.

No, Li Lun screamed at himself. Not her!

He knelt next to Zhu Yan, reaching out for Xiao Hua when her body started to break into particles. His eyes widened and Zhu Yan tried to grab hold of what's left of her disappearing body.

"No!" Zhu Yan screamed, grabbing the last particle of Xiao Hua's body before his hand fell limply to his lap.

Li Lun stared at the arrow clattering to the wet ground. The single arrow that stole their daughter's life.

Anger, fiery and hot, like the lava that spills onto the land, burned in Li Lun. His eyes darkened with rage. He slowly stood up with a low snarl and his eyes glowed green and gold. He clenched his hands into tight fists.

Whoever did this will die by his hands.

He leaned down, picking Zhu Yan up in a bridal carry and felt his mate leaned heavily on him. Li Lun felt the deep grief between them. The wound was too fresh and Li Lun took a deep breath.

They disappeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves and Li Lun gently placed Zhu Yan into their nest. His mate was unresponsive and it tore Li Lun's heart to see Zhu Yan so devastated. None of this was supposed to happen.

Li Lun pressed a hard kiss to Zhu Yan's forehead and felt no movement at all. When he pulled back, all he saw was a blank gaze and Zhu Yan's scent had turned muddy with grief. Li Lun left in a swirl of pagoda leaves, appearing where their daughter just died. He looked for the token on her belt, hoping to find it and give it to Zhu Yan.

At least something for them to remember her by.

He searched for it and found nothing. The token was gone and Li Lun felt tears fall. He fell to his knees, landing on the water and the sky darkened with heavy grey clouds. Rain fell, drenching him with rainwater and his tears mixed with it together.

Li Lun looked up to the sky and screamed the hardest for the first time. The sky rumbled with thunder, echoing his grief and pain.

He returned home, finding Zhu Yan still in the same position and Li Lun did the one thing he has never done to Zhu Yan.

He crouched in front of the nest, leaning forward with rainwater dripping down his chin. He pressed his lips against the shell of Zhu Yan's ear and hoped it was the right thing to do.

"Sleep," Li Lun commanded with an alpha tone and Zhu Yan's eyes slipped closed.

His body sank against the walls of the nest and Li Lun carefully rearranged him. "I"m sorry," Li Lun whispered. "I'm so sorry."

~~~~~~

Li Lun appeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves and darkness in Tiandu. His skin was bare from the Baize Token and he knew he had broken many rules. The arrow that killed his daughter's life was held in his hand. Anger was all he felt and he channelled his power into finding the person who killed his daughter.

The arrow quivered in his palm. It hovered an inch above his palm and it spun in a circle before slowing down till it stilled, pointing in one direction.

Li Lun's gaze followed the path it pointed and he marched his way down with roots slithering beside him, hunting, searching. He was the predator now, hunting for his prey. He slowly swayed his arm like a compass till the arrow stopped spinning and pointed in another direction.

He sent out his roots. It snagged onto something and dragged a person. The man screamed and Li Lun snapped his neck with ease. People started screaming when they saw him but Li Lun didn't care.

Not when he was on a hunt. Each time the arrow stopped and Li Lun sent his roots to drag someone back, he killed them. He killed men—ordinary and hunters.

Someone landed next to him. His eyes narrowed and he threw a hard punch but stopped mid hit. Zhu Yan stood in front of him with a blank gaze, hardly caring he was about to get hit.

A group of demon hunters yelled loudly, charging towards them with their swords raised. Li Lun wasted no time in killing them. His vines and roots wrapped around their bodies, pulling them down and snapping their necks with an ease twist.

Li Lun paused when he sensed malicious energy being swallowed and he followed it to find Zhu Yan absorbing the energy. Blank red eyes met Li Lun's and Li Lun turned back to feed Zhu Yan the power he needed.

Their path of revenge had sent them to punishment when Zhu Yan ended up killing yāos and humans. The first time Zhu Yan snapped a bird yāo's neck, Li Lun knew this wasn't revenge anymore.

It was a killing spree and Zhu Yan was acting his hatred and revenge on anything. They fought with an innocent bystander caught in between and Li Lun didn't want to harm his mate. He felt the pain, grief, hatred and everything else that Zhu Yan was feeling swirl through their bond.

“You're killing yāos, Zhu Yan!” Li Lun yelled at him, throwing a hard spell with vines and roots to hold Zhu Yan down. 

“What does it matter!? They killed our pup! She's dead because of them!” Zhu Yan was lost in grief, barely able to tell between a yāo and a human. 

The dog yāo that was caught in between their fight, whimpered in fright. Li Lun gritted his teeth and slammed his palms onto the ground. Thick vines and roots shot out, grasping Zhu Yan into a tighter embrace. 

Li Lun briefly shifted his gaze to the dog yāo on the ground. “Go,” Li Lun hissed at the dog yāo and they scrambled to run. 

Zhu Yan's eyes flashed red in warning. Li Lun may have immobile his body but his lips moved, uttering his one word spell. Li Lun couldn't stop Zhu Yan and the spell swept passed him.

“Drop.” 

The dog yāo fell face first to the ground. Their body convulsed before stilling. Their life was taken and Li Lun watched with an unsettled look. His breath shuddered and he did what he thought would stop his mate, even though it'll hurt them.  

He flung Zhu Yan against a hard slab of stone. The loud gasp of pain made Li Lun's heart twisted in pain. A deep ache to his back made itself known.

Zhu Yan coughed harshly, spitting out a mouthful of blood before he laughed at Li Lun. “You actually harm me?” Zhu Yan grinned. “Your own mate.” 

“Stop it Zhu Yan,” Li Lun growled. “This has to stop…this isn't right.” 

“Who are you to tell me what's right or wrong!?" Zhu Yan screamed. "You're just the same, Li Lun. You're the one who went on a path of revenge, killing them and we got it,” Zhu Yan said, eyes were wild with blood lust. “They had to die. They had to suffer for what they did to our pup! She didn't deserve death!” 

“She doesn't want her own mother to spiral into this.” Li Lun's words pierced Zhu Yan's heart and he can feel the staggering emotions through the bond. “Zhu Yan, please,” Li Lun begged. “Come here,” he softly said and Zhu Yan's lips wobbled with suppressed tears. 

Zhu Yan took a step forward till he suddenly stilled. Li Lun's eyes widened at the malicious energy swirling around Zhu Yan's feet like an obedient puppy.

He looked up to find the blood moon in sight. This was worst and Li Lun pulled a shield up immediately to protect himself. Zhu Yan's power slammed into his shield and his mate's face rushed up to meet him.

Zhu Yan smiled cruelly. Li Lun threw a high kick and Zhu Yan spun away, avoiding getting hit. Li Lun can't win against Zhu Yan during a blood moon and it always tore his heart to see his mate struggle after the outcome.

Zhu Yan lit his palm up with his power. Li Lun can smell smoke and his heart thundered in his chest. Fire was a tree's weakness and Li Lun is afraid of it for many reasons.

He dodged Zhu Yan's attacks, leaning away to avoid getting scratched or burned. Li Lun threw vines to draw the flame away, hoping it will catch but Zhu Yan knew him well.

Zhu Yan pulled his hand back, transferring to the other palm. They fought hand to hand, side stepping away from each other or swiping clawed hands to injure.

Li Lun hissed when Zhu Yan landed a blow against his shoulder. Hot pain burst on his shoulder and the agony of a fire burning wood. He was stunned that Zhu Yan injured him and he was too late to dodge Zhu Yan's elbow slamming into his face.

He gasped in pain. Zhu Yan grabbed his face and slammed him down against the gravel floor. Stone and sharp twigs cut into Li Lun's face. He wrapped a root around Zhu Yan's ankle and pulled him down.

The white ape yāo went falling, crashing onto his back with a groan. Li Lun pushed himself up, wrapping more vines and roots around Zhu Yan to subdue him. He quickly gagged Zhu Yan with a thick root, making sure no spell would be uttered.

He felt blood dripped down the side of his face and he ignored it. His main focus was Zhu Yan. Li Lun hugged him from behind and brought Zhu Yan to the base of Dianmu Divine Tree in a tornado of pagoda leaves.

They collapsed against the thick roots and Li Lun coughed harshly. He breathed through the pain lacing his shoulder and blood dripped down his head.

Zhu Yan thrashed in his binds, knocking Li Lun down with malicious energy. But Li Lun stayed still, tightening his hug around Zhu Yan with the roots and his arms.

Zhu Yan screamed behind his gag, collapsing onto Li Lun's chest and they waited for the blood moon to end. Li Lun kept a tight grip even after Zhu Yan returned. Li Lun didn't dare let him go and Zhu Yan sank deeper into his hold.

They stayed together in the same position, unmoving, until the Baize Goddess found them and separated them nearly forever. 

Li Lun watched Zhu Yan leave while he was chained and imprisoned in his birth place. He doesn't know if it was mercy or a death sentence.

~~~~~~

Li Lun looked up at the hole from his cave in Huaijing Valley. What little light that could come through was weak and flitting. He soaked up whatever sunlight he could grab, making sure to warm his body and he closed his eyes to continue cultivating. 

He’ll escape from this place, he told himself. He’ll escape and find his beloved omega. A delusional dream to have but Li Lun wanted proof that Zhu Yan was once alive.

He remembered the feeling of little emotions seeping into their bond. Li Lun returned the feelings with reassurance and strength, hoping it was enough for Zhu Yan.

Then he felt their bond breaking. It felt like his soul was snapped in half, torn from his body. He collapsed to the floor, twitching and gasping in pain before curling into a ball.

It was agony, feeling the last few emotions from Zhu Yan was nothing but fear and pain. It made him think that Zhu Yan died, leaving Li Lun behind and Li Lun cried for him.

His sobs went unheard by no one. He cried for his daughter. He cried for the lost of his mate and he cried for losing everything he had with Zhu Yan.

He needed to see Zhu Yan, to confirm that his mate was dead before deciding to destroy his own core. If he destroys his inner core, he could be with his daughter and mate again. He told himself they were waiting for him. 

After all, a dead bond means a dead mate.

So, Li Lun waited and cultivated. 

The years had passed and time felt irrelevant to him.

He leaned against the stone slab, staring at the emptiness of his prison. He can hear the Yāo waters flowing beneath his place. The barest of comforts for him as a way to steadily grow his power. 

In truth, he felt unbalanced without his mate by his side. The dead bond was a hard pill to swallow and Li Lun felt like drowning without his anchor.

He’s dead, his mind screamed at him. And it is your fault that you ended up like this.

Shut up, shut up! Li Lun snarled to himself.

He pulled against his chains and it stretched as far as he could go. His inner alpha growled at him. It snarled and roared at his own failure at protecting his family.

He gave a loud yell. It echoed in the cave, bouncing off the walls and Li Lun wished Zhu Yan was by his side again. 

He wanted to feel his mate's warmth, to hear his teasing laughter and the soft whispers of his name. He wanted to breathe in Zhu Yan's comforting scent, to hold him and bury his nose into the marked scent gland.

He wanted the ache in his chest to stop. He wanted this spiralling feeling to stop descending into madness from a dead bond. 

Li Lun slammed his fists into the stone, ignoring the feel of his skin splitting. An unknown presence suddenly entered his domain.

Unknown and powerful.

His head snapped up, slowly turning around. His fingertips glowed blue and gold, ready to attack despite the inscriptions glowing in warning. He wasn't expecting anyone to come here and a woman wasn't it.

She wore clothes dressed in white, holding a white flute in hand. Her doe-like eyes met his gaze and Li Lun narrowed his eyes when he didn’t recognize her.

He searched her face for any familiarity but found none except for the power in her. His gaze dropped to the white flute. He knew that flute and it was the caused of everything for him.

“Baize Flute,” he muttered, gaze snapping up at her face.

He instantly knew who she was. “Baize Goddess,” he said loudly, straightening his back to stand tall with anger in his eyes. “Why are you here? Came to extend my punishment?” he mocked and the Baize Goddess shook her head, confusing Li Lun.

“No,” she said, voice soft and melodic. “I’m here to free you. I have heard of your punishment from the previous Baize Goddess—"

Li Lun wasn’t really in the mood to play games with her. “Why should I believe in your words?" He snapped. "You put me in here with chains that bind me. You separated my mate from me with a treaty that brings nothing to us. Isn't that punishment enough?” 

The Baize Goddess gave him a melancholic look. “Not everything has to be punished," she said softly, as if understanding his pain.

Her words seemed cryptic to him. He’s not a human to understand her gaze either and he turned around from her.

She brought the flute up to her lips and played the song. The song that sometimes haunt him with the memories of Zhu Yan leaving him.

Li Lun tensed, ready to reject the Baize power even if it meant hurting himself when the chains fell from his wrists and ankles. He looked down at the opened cuffs. The gold inscription dimmed until it was just ordinary black chains laying on the floor. He stared at it, rotating his wrists to feel it lighter.

He doesn't understand. He turned around, looking at her with a blank stare. 

“Will you help me keep the peace between Dà Huāng and the human realm?” She asked and Li Lun frowned, his fingers twitching to snap her neck.

"What for? What do you need me for?" He asked her with a low growl, debating in killing her. "You've already sent one of the Great Yāos to Tiandu as part of the treaty."

"I'm in need of a Great Yāo. Someone who can share half the power of the Baize Token and help in protecting Dà Huāng. Tiandu has one, yes, but Dà Huāng doesn't."

Li Lun scoffed again. "There isn't a need to share it. I do not want half of your power."

"But it will grant an easier passage for you to Tiandu."

Her words made him paused. His fingers stopped twitching and his thoughts halted. If he agrees to her demand and has half the Baize Token, he could easily go in and out of Tiandu. He could find Zhu Yan without having the need to get a Baize Token stamp from her every time he needs to go down.

He lifted his head up high and stared down at her.

“Dà Huāng is still under my protection whether you are the Baize Goddess or not,” Li Lun stated and the Baize Goddess nodded in agreement. “What’s your name?” 

The Baize Goddess looked at him with a kind gaze and her smile widened. It reminded Li Lun of Zhu Yan’s knowing wide smile when Li Lun agreed to something, and it brought an ache to his cold heart.

“Zhao Wan’er,” she said and Li Lun felt it suited her well. 

“Great Yāo,” Zhao Wan’er said softly. “May I know your name?” 

Li Lun thought of refusing but he doesn't want to be called Great Yāo either.

“Li Lun,” he said, stepping down from his stone perch. “Zhao Wan’er, I do not acknowledged you as the Baize Goddess.” He refused but in time he'll grow to be fond of her.

A tree remembers the past and the hurt would show on the barks before settling into a place it will call home.

Zhao Wan’er only nodded along and it didn’t grate on Li Lun’s nerves like the first Baize Goddess. Maybe it’s because Zhao Wan’er wasn’t the one who imprisoned him. Maybe it's because her gaze reminded him of Zhu Yan.

Whatever it is, he's free and he took his first step out of his home. 

Chapter Text

Freedom is like a dual edge sword, Li Lun felt. It can be given and it can be taken.

He stood outside of his home, feeling the warmth of the full sun for the first time in so long. He closed his eyes, relishing in the feel until he heard the sound of gravel crunching behind him.

He opened his eyes, waiting for Zhao Wan'er to stop a few paces away from him. She was bright in his eyes and he avoided looking at her. He doesn't believe in her words but he needs to find Zhu Yan.

"I'm giving you a fair warning," Li Lun said to her. "If you do something that will cause a hindrance to my duty in protecting Dà Huāng," he turned to her, reaching to grab her neck but stopped in a threatening manner. "I will snap your neck."

Zhao Wan'er blinked at him and his threat. She seemed unfazed by it and nodded in agreement.

"I was warned of you liking to threaten people and yāos," Zhao Wan'er smiled at him and Li Lun pulled his hand back. "Freedom can be taken away, Li Lun."

He grunted in answer, looking away from her and sighed loudly. "The Baize Token, what do I need to do?"

Zhao Wan'er reached for her forehead where a golden sigil lit up. Li Lun watched her pull tendrils of Baize power until a token was formed. An S like curve was formed in the middle of the token. It snapped in half, following the shape and she sent one of the token towards Li Lun.

Gold inscriptions swirled around his arms before settling into his skin. He felt the Baize power filling him, mixing with his yāo energy as well. It felt warm and whatever blocked meridians he had was suddenly smoothened out by the Baize Token.

He lifted his right hand up and found a light golden Baize Token stamped on his skin. Unlike the usual Baize Token he receives when leaving Dà Huāng, this one shimmered with a darker gold. He knew it was a permanent token.

His life was going to be different now.

He looked down at himself, finding his robes open in the wind. A flick of his wrist and his clothes disappeared until he was dressed in a full set of clean robes. Dark blue and black with light gold stitches stitched in patterns of roots and leaves.

Zhao Wan'er chuckled lightly and Li Lun narrowed his eyes at her. He felt like pushing her but the Baize Token on his hand lit up in warning before dimming.

"We need to visit Mount Kunlun. I have to present to you to the Mountain Gods that I have found a Great Yāo to help me," Zhao Wan'er said and Li Lun stiffened.

Mountain Kunlun. He hasn't been there ever since…He swallowed visibly. His shoulders were stiff. His scent took a slight spike of panic before he stamped it down with a deep breath. He nodded at her.

There was someone he hasn't seen in a long time also.

~~~~~~

Ying Zhao looked the same to Li Lun. The older alpha blinked wide eyes at Li Lun, slowly stepping down from the stairs to stand in front of him.

Li Lun stared back, clenching his hands tightly into a fist. His mouth couldn't work all of a sudden and his thought laid empty in his head. He wanted to tell Ying Zhao many things and enquire about Zhu Yan. But he felt like a baby yāo in front of the old mountain god.

It reminded him of the first time he met Ying Zhao and Li Lun felt that same sensation again. It was a different mountain god who broke the atmosphere with scepticism and uncertainty.

"Baize Goddess, this won't work," one of the mountain gods spoke. "He was imprisoned for a reason."

"And I chose him as the other protector for Dà Huāng," Zhao Wan'er answered. "There is no other Great Yāo that lives in Dà Huāng. Li Lun has the knowledge and maybe more about the yāo's and the land."

"He killed humans!"

Ying Zhao sighed, knowing the actual truth. Stories and rumours have circulated about Li Lun descending onto Tiandu with greed and blood lust. Ying Zhao felt the grief when he learnt of Xiao Hua's death. He understood the pain of losing a pup and he shared that pain with Li Lun too.

"Would you not want to find who killed your own child?" Zhao Wan'er suddenly asked and the room fell silent.

Li Lun's gaze snapped towards her. Ying Zhao quickly gripped Li Lun's wrist in a silent warning to stand down. Zhao Wan'er stood tall, looking at each mountain god and her eyes were understanding in her own way.

"Death is never easy," she said. "Death leads many to different paths and a death of a family," she turned to Li Lun. "Is painful as it is."

Something about her gaze told Li Lun she was more than understanding towards yāos. It felt like she had went through the process.

"And I personally picked him," she continued. "If he didn't agree, I wouldn't be standing here before you."

The mountain gods looked troubled and only Ying Zhao seemed to be in agreement.

"Li Lun's birthplace is where the Yāo waters run and it's what keeps all things flowing," Ying Zhao said, shifting his grip to hold Li Lun's shoulders. "Without him maintaining it, Dà Huāng would have perished a long time ago."

Li Lun's eyes shimmered briefly with tears before he blinked it away. Zhao Wan'er nodded sagely too. She faced him with a smile and continued to persuade the other mountain gods. Only Ying Zhao and Zhao Wan'er stood beside him until everyone reluctantly agreed.

He was given another chance. He couldn't dwell further when Ying Zhao gently patted his shoulder.

"There is something I would like to show you." Ying Zhao led Li Lun into the temple, away from the usual sites until Li Lun recognized the plaques.

Memorial plaques.

They stopped in front of one memorial plaque, decorated with cravings of flowers and leaves. Li Lun read the name carved on the plaque.

Xiao Hua. Beloved daughter of two great yāos.

Li Lun's fingers trembled when he slowly reached for the plaque. His legs couldn't hold his weight and he fell to his knees. His bottom lip wobbled, gritting his teeth hard to stop himself from crying out loud.

Ying Zhao left him to have his moment of peace. Li Lun cupped his hands together in a prayer and bowed before the plaque.

"Baba is sorry. I couldn't protect you and left you when you needed us the most," Li Lun said, blinking his tears away. "I'm so sorry, my bǎobè. Baba is very sorry I couldn't save your mother too."

A light breeze blew in and Li Lun heard a light child's giggle. It was gone before he could even say anything. He sat in front of the plaque, staring at her name until he quietly left with a promise of visiting her again.

~~~~~~

Learning to use the Baize Token together with Zhao Wan'er was a hard learning curve for the two of them. There were a lot of mishaps when they tried to use it.

The first time they tried to seal a rogue yāo, the Baize Token wrapped around Li Lun instead and hung him up. Li Lun cursed and killed the rogue yāo with his roots instead, saving both himself and Zhao Wan'er.

Another time was both of them were flung into the lake when the two Tokens opposed each other. Ying Zhao chose not to say anything when Li Lun carried a dripping wet Zhao Wan'er. The pagoda tree yāo was drenched as well and his clothes stuck to his body like a second skin.

"This isn't working," Li Lun growled out, flicking his wet sleeves before peeling it off to hang above the fire.

Zhao Wan'er was wrapped in a thick dry blanket while her clothes were being dried too. Ying Zhao poured them both some hot tea. The Baize Goddess smiled in thanks, sipping on the hot tea while Li Lun grumbled.

"It isn't working because the two of you don't have a connection," Ying Zhao said, sitting down. "There needs to be a connection or some sort of understanding between the two of you."

"What kind of understanding?" Li Lun narrowed his eyes, taking the offered cup of tea.

"In previous generations of the Baize Token, a connection between the chosen Baize Goddess and a Great Yāo in the form of understanding or a deeper level would the Baize Token work," Ying Zhao explained.

"A deeper level?" Zhao Wan'er mumbled before it dawned onto the two of them. "Oh."

"No," Li Lun stood up, ignoring his half dressed state. "I am not falling in love with you."

"It doesn't have to be love," Ying Zhao pointed out and Li Lun almost broke the cup in his hand.

"Zhu Yan is the only one I love," Li Lun hissed and Zhao Wan'er quickly covered her face with the blanket.

The tips of her ears were red and her shoulders were trembling from suppressed laughter. Li Lun growled at her, fingertips glowing with blue and gold energy before Ying Zhao sighed loudly.

"There are other forms of understanding besides love," Ying Zhao said, pulling out a bamboo thin stick and hitting Li Lun on the side. "Put that down. Have I not taught you any manners?"

Li Lun dispersed his power and sat down like a petulant child. He huffed and nodded for Ying Zhao to continue.

"Other forms such as love for a family, friends. The fondness of a disciple and master. The care between comrades. These are the kind of understanding. If the two of you reached up to a certain level than the Baize Token will work fine."

Li Lun studied the fire embers crackling at the top. A mutual understanding between them would have been better but he still holds his hatred for what the previous Baize Goddess did to him and Zhu Yan.

He sighed, running a hand through his semi dried hair. He should forgive but he couldn't and he knows it's what holding him back from accepting Zhao Wan'er.

Ying Zhao left them, pottering around to reboil the water for them to drink. Zhao Wan'er pulled the blanket tighter to her body and Li Lun said nothing to her.

"I know what it is like to lose someone," Zhao Wan'er said, gaining Li Lun's attention. "To lose someone close to you is devastating."

"What do you know about losing a mate and pup?" Li Lun sneered to her.

"I lost my brother," she said and Li Lun's mouth snapped shut. "We were young and he was the only family I had."

Li Lun looked away, not knowing what to say. Zhu Yan always knew what to say or even comfort someone like their upset daughter. Li Lun sighed, suddenly feeling like he judged Zhao Wan'er too fast, as Zhu Yan always scolds him for.

"How?" He asked, an unspoken question and Zhao Wan'er smiled a small smile.

"A couple of thieves broke into our home," she answered, clasping her hands together and her eyes went misty with memory. "We didn't have anything and we lost our parents very early. He tried to protect me and he was stabbed."

"His name?"

"Zhao Yuanzhou," Zhao Wan'er answered. "But it's been a long time since then. So I do understand what it means to lose someone close to you. Like your mate and daughter, my brother was everything to me."

Li Lun chose not to say anything when Ying Zhao returned with a fresh pot of hot water. The atmosphere between them was different and Li Lun knew he could learn to trust her. It will take time, he told himself, but briefly he could see Zhu Yan laughing and smiling along with Zhao Wan'er and their little daughter toddling around.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to let someone in again. Someone who wasn't his mate and Zhao Wan'er felt different from the other Baize Goddess.

They tried again, hoping with the little information Zhao Wan'er shared was enough for them to form a connection.

Zhao Wan'er played the flute and Li Lun made a hand gesture to summon the Baize power. Swirls of inscriptions swirled around his wrists and they managed to trap a snarling snake yāo from wrecking havoc in Tiandu.

Ying Zhao chuckled when they stared at each other. Li Lun didn't expect the Baize Token to work and Zhao Wan'er smiled a wide smile. The type of connections they formed was more of a mutual understanding and Li Lun will take it as it is.

He knows he won't fall for Zhao Wan'er and vice versa. Li Lun looked down at his wrists, watching the gold inscriptions slowly die down until it was just his bare skin. He clenched his hands into a tight fist.

With one less thing to worry, he could start to plan to find Zhu Yan in the mortal realm. Determination burned in his chest and he won't stop until he finds Zhu Yan's status.

"Now that you two have managed to form and understanding, all that's left is strengthening the star formation," Ying Zhao said and Li Lun's thoughts halted immediately.

"Star formation?" Li Lun questioned, feeling like there was more than just a simple formation.

Ying Zhao nodded. "A star formation that holds Dà Huāng and prevents it from breaking apart. Without it, Dà Huāng would have been destroyed a long time ago. After all, it was Bing Yi who defeated Ying Long and set up the star formation before he vanished."

"And for generations, the Baize Goddess and a Great Yāo have been strengthening the star formation," Zhao Wan'er said, glancing at Li Lun with a knowing look.

Li Lun sighed roughly. He shouldn't be brash in his thinking about finding Zhu Yan so soon and he's still under the other mountain gods scrutiny. It would be a bad idea to descend to Tiandu. So he waited and learnt how to strengthen the Star formation.

The other mountain gods helped as well, watching for any signs of abnormality. When the formation was done, he left Zhao Wan'er alone, heading to the memorial plaque and sat in front of his daughter's plaque.

He didn't say a word, just sat quietly. Another presence appeared, kneeling a foot away from him. He knew Zhao Wan'er's scent of lilies and water that she uses. For a beta, she smells nice, Li Lun's mind told him but not as nice as Zhu Yan's scent.

Zhao Wan'er gave her respect, bowing in front of Xiao Hua's plaque. When she sat up straight, they sat together in silence, neither wanted to say anything. With a little bravery, Zhao Wan'er gently touched Li Lun's pinky finger with her own, waiting for his reaction.

He didn't push her away nor did he pulled back either. He let her, sitting quietly with an understanding growing between them of the loss of family.

Grief, Li Lun learnt can be shared and let go little by little. He realized the more he spent his time with Zhao Wan'er, the more he learnt to let go. Maybe it's the void in his heart that yearns for his mate. Maybe it's the little invisible wounds on his body that he received that needed healing. He touched the scar that Zhu Yan gave him on a blood moon as the last thing he received from his mate.

~~~~~~

Tiandu looked the same to Li Lun. He had followed Ying Zhao and Zhao Wan'er for errands. He wore his human disguise of white robes and tied his hair in a short half ponytail. Ying Zhao chuckled at his form and Zhao Wan'er smiled knowingly. His only reaction was a raised eyebrow and no words were said.

He followed behind them, casting warily glances at every human face he saw. He felt agitated and he had to stamp his inner alpha from snarling at every brush of shoulder against his. He felt it was too soon for him to come here.

The rain must have felt his mood because it came pouring down all of a sudden. They took shelter underneath a medicine shop, waiting for the rain to pass.

Li Lun flicked his hands from the rain water and Zhao Wan'er dabbed at her face with her handkerchief. Ying Zhao sighed, studying the dark clouds when Li Lun suddenly stiffened, catching their attention.

"Li Lun?" Zhao Wan'er softly called and Li Lun slowly turned around, eyeing the back door of the shop. "What is it?"

"I smell blood," Li Lun said, pulling Zhao Wan'er behind him. "Yāo's blood."

Zhao Wan'er and Ying Zhao looked alarm. "Stay here," Li Lun warned them, heading towards the back door with caution.

He slowly pushed the door open, hearing it creaked loudly and stared at the dark staircase. The scent of blood was stronger and he wrinkled his nose. He carefully crept down the stairs, heading deeper into the basement.

Bells tinkled above him and he knew what they were. Demon repelling bells. He almost snarled at it, walking past the barely lit hallway until he came upon a large stone room.

Blood coated the walls in large streaks. Cages lined up closely to each other in different sizes. Li Lun felt sick to his stomach. Some cages held dying yāos while others had blood covering the floor. Bodies of children yāos and adults sat in the cages. Some were in different states of injuries while others were gasping for air as they slowly bled out.

Li Lun balled his hands into a tight fist. He had to take deep breaths to stop his hands from shaking but the stench of blood was very strong. He moved down the narrowed path, looking at each cage with a tight expression.

The ends of his white robes started to soak the blood up, dying the white cloth red. Each yāo—alive or not—looked at him with a dead look. Some reached out weakly towards him, whispering words to be saved.

He couldn't save all of them.

"I'm sorry," he whispered to the weaker yāos and silenced them with a simple killing spell.

A mercy killing for them and he sent his roots out, snapping their necks to end their misery until he stopped at one cage. The Yāo was alive and well enough—minus her wounds—staring at her clawed hands with a feline look.

Li Lun stopped in front of her cage, smelling of sulphur. He watched the yāo slowly turned her attention towards him. Her yāo markings was stark on her skin in shapes of stylised triangles.

A shape shifter yāo.

Thick chains cuffed around her wrists and ankles. She scuttled backwards, baring her teeth at him when he dropped his human disguise for a moment. His yāo markings appeared and the female yāo's eyes widened.

Li Lun pulled his human disguise back on, snapping the cage's lock easily. He sent out a sharp root, breaking the chains around her and offered his hand to her.

"Come with me," he said and she immediately grasped his hand without hesitation.

He easily lifted her up in a bridal carry, feeling how light she was. The female yāo clung onto his shoulder with a quiet gasp and beneath the sulphur scent, Li Lun could smell an alpha's scent.

Pandan and lemongrass.

He hefted up higher, climbing up the stairs. He ignored Zhao Wan'er and Ying Zhao's shocked looks at his state of dress and the yāo in his arms. The rain was easing up and he rather not stay in this place any longer.

"I'm leaving now," he said and he felt hands grabbed hold of his arms before they left in a swirl of pagoda leaves.

He learnt that the female shape shifter he rescued was called Ao Yin. He also learnt she was very good at following him everywhere. Ao Yin wouldn't leave him alone, choosing to trot behind him when they were in Mountain Kunlun.

Zhao Wan'er found it amusing that Li Lun has gain a little follower when they returned to the White Tower. He dumped Ao Yin next to Zhao Wan'er and disappeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves, leaving the two women behind.

Li Lun wanted some time alone, tending to the plants and trees in Dà Huāng and checking them for any issues. He spent his time, breathing in the sea at the stone beach. He walked through the stone sands, stopping at the spot where he first met Zhu Yan.

Memories of their time together flooded his mind. Li Lun closed his eyes, feeling ghostly arms wrapped around him and Zhu Yan's happy chirp of "Li Lun!" echoed in his ears. He missed the feeling.

He missed his mate so much that it physically hurts.

Their bond is gone and he clutched onto his chest, fisting his robes tightly. He slowly lowered himself to the ground, dipping his head low until he felt the stones dig into his forehead. Tears fell from his closed eyes and he silently cried for the deep longing for his mate.

He returned to The White Tower after a few days of wandering the places he went with Zhu Yan. He climbed up the stairs, expecting silence as his greeting but he didn't expect to find Zhao Wan'er putting hair pins into Ao Yin's hair after dressing her up.

"Oh, you're back," Zhao Wan'er said, sliding the last pin in. "Ao Yin, look."

Ao Yin scrambled to stand up, bowing in greeting with a tight posture. "Master, welcome back."

Li Lun's eyebrow twitched and Zhao Wan'er held back a laughter. He nodded stiffly at Ao Yin and sat down in front of Zhao Wan'er. Ao Yin quickly made her way over, pouring tea for him and he sighed loudly.

"You don't have to serve me. I set you free for a reason. You can do what you want," Li Lun told Ao Yin and the shape shifter yāo shifted on the spot.

"I'm grateful that you saved me," Ao Yin spoke and Li Lun looked at her. "I don't have anywhere else to go and I'm in your debt. This is my choice in serving you."

Li Lun studied her. "How good is your shape shifting?" He asked and she hesitated.

"Not good enough." Ao Yin clenched her fists tightly and Li Lun hummed.

"Then train until you can perfect it," Li Lun said, picking up his tea. "Then maybe I might consider keeping you around."

Zhao Wan'er clicked her tongue but Li Lun ignored it. He saw Ao Yin's face brightened and she nodded furiously. He couldn't help but to smile at her, hiding it behind his cup of tea. He gained more than just a follower. He gained someone who could help him.

~~~~~~

Ao Yin trained hard, perfecting her disguise and Li Lun walked around her, studying her perfect copy of Zhao Wan'er. Zhao Wan'er was impressed, clapping excitedly at the display and Li Lun hummed.

"Not bad," he said, tapping her back to stand straighter. "Speak."

"I am Zhao Wan'er. Baize Goddess of Dà Huāng and I hold the power of the Baize Token," Ao Yin said in Zhao Wan'er's voice.

"She does sound like you," Li Lun said and Zhao Wan'er can see the amusement in his eyes. She nodded in agreement. "Change back."

Ao Yin changed into her human form, hiding her yāo marks. She wore a simple robe with earrings and a single hairpin Zhao Wan'er had gifted her. She stood ready to listen to Li Lun and he flicked her forehead at her eagerness.

"Zhao Wan'er, give her a Baize Token," Li Lun said and Zhao Wan'er frowned. "I need her to look for someone for me."

Zhao Wan'er wanted to protest but she saw the look in Li Lun's eyes. She waved her hand and the Baize token stamp appeared on Ao Yin's hand.

Ao Yin blinked at the stamp, watching it shimmer when she tilted her hand sideways. She was mesmerized by the stamp until Li Lun huffed.

"Does this have something to do about your mate?" Zhao Wan'er asked softly and Ao Yin stared at Li Lun with wide eyes.

"Yes," Li Lun answered without hesitation. "I need her to find him for me."

"Li Lun, he's with—"

"I just need confirmation," Li Lun suddenly snapped and Ao Yin flinched. His shoulders sank. "I just need to know how he's doing."

Zhao Wan'er couldn't refute Li Lun's request. She signed softly too and stood up to brush Ao Yin's clothes down. She righted Ao Yin's hair pin until she was satisfied.

"I don't know his name," Zhao Wan'er said and Ao Yin nodded. "But that he's with a Zhuo. That's all I know. If you can find his whereabouts, report back to us. Don't do anything that will compromise yourself."

"Okay. What is his name?" Ao Yin asked, turning to Li Lun.

"Zhu Yan," Li Lun answered and Ao Yin changed into a human man. "Don't get caught." He warned her and followed her to Mountain Kunlun to see her off at the border.

Years have passed and Ao Yin returned empty handed. Li Lun nodded at her, letting her do as she wants but she stayed close to him and only left to deal with her own rut cycle. Overtime, Li Lun settled in his role as the Great Yāo with the Baize Token until Zhao Wan'er brought something home.

A someone to be precise.

Li Lun stared down at the little ten-year-old girl peeking from behind Zhao Wan’er’s skirt in the White Tower. The girl was human and Li Lun wrinkled his nose at the sight of her. He looked at Zhao Wan’er smiling brightly at him. Li Lun should have stayed home, he thought.

“Who is that?” Li Lun roughly asked and the little girl flinched at his tone, hiding behind Zhao Wan’er. “Why is there a human girl with you?” 

Zhao Wan’er maintained her smile but her eyes flashed with warning. Li Lun huffed at the warning, feeling non threatened by it. Even Zhao Wan'er knew she couldn't intimidate Li Lun.

Li Lun waited for Zhao Wan’er’s answer and she placed a calming hand on top of the little girl’s head. She smiled warmly, almost motherly, at the girl peering up at her. 

“This is Wen Xiao,” Zhao Wan’er said, petting Wen Xiao’s head. “My apprentice.”

“Congratulations on gaining an apprentice," Li Lun said in a deadpan voice. "Why am I here?” he asked, standing still like the tree he is despite wanting to leave. “If this isn’t important, I’ll take my leave.”

He needed to escape. He can sense Zhao Wan’er's mind of wanting to use him. He felt her hand quickly grabbed his arm. 

Fuck.

“It is important,” Zhao Wan’er said. “I have to see Ying Zhao in Mount Kunlun and I cannot bring Wen Xiao with me.”

Li Lun’s eyes narrowed at Zhao Wan’er. “Are you asking me to play…babysitter to your human apprentice?”

Zhao Wan’er nodded. “You’re the only one I can trust, Li Lun.” 

“You’re playing a fine line, Zhao Wan’er.” But he didn’t refute her either when she gently pushed Wen Xiao to be in front of Li Lun. "Ao Yin would be a better choice."

"Ao Yin is on an errand for you, remember. Web Xiao is just a child. Look after her properly," Zhao Wan'er said but there was a hint of warning in her tone before she took off to Mount Kunlun. 

It left Li Lun and Wen Xiao alone together. They stared at each other, unsure of what to do. Li Lun, despite being a father before, knew very little of what to do with a human child. He can hear Zhu Yan’s chuckle in his ear.

"Don’t be so awkward, Li Lun," Zhu Yan said and Li Lun sighed loudly, making Wen Xiao flinch from him. 

“Do not fall behind,” he warned her and turned around to head in to check on the Dianmu Divine Tree. “And do not touch anything," he said as an after note.

He climbed up the steps of the White Tower, hearing little feet chasing after him. Judging from the sound, he knew Wen Xiao was following him. He stopped in front of the stone grave marked with an oath of protecting Dà Huāng together with Zhu Yan.

And a place he kissed Zhu Yan too.

Li Lun flinched when Wen Xiao collided into the back of his legs. He almost fell forward and he whirled onto her with a hard glare. 

She scrunched her nose up with eyes filling with tears. Of all the human children Zhao Wan'er picked up, she chose a crying one.

"Don’t be so mean. She’s just a little pup," Zhu Yan chided him and Li Lun thinks he’s going mad, listening to his imaginative mate’s voice in his head. "Be gentle with her."

Li Lun breathed a hard sigh through his nose, willing his anger away. He faced the Dianmu Divine Tree, ignoring Wen Xiao. If Wen Xiao can stay still, he wouldn't mind. He made different hand gestures, sending a pulse of yāo energy towards the large, ancient tree and it pulsed back in greeting.

The familiar energy sent a wave of warmth through him. His tense shoulders instantly relaxed from the familiarity. His gaze trailed up to the tree and its height brought the memory of Zhu Yan’s love of climbing high places.

The gold lines pulsed through the tree bark, creating golden river like patterns. It glowed in greeting him, like an old friend. His lips twitched upwards in a fond smile.

“Pretty,” Wen Xiao mumbled and Li Lun stiffened.

He had forgotten about his human audience for a moment. 

He glanced down at her to find her staring at the tree with wide curious eyes. Her gaze reminded him of his little blossom. Large with burning curiosity and so alike with Zhu Yan’s gaze. If his little girl was here, would she be the same age as Wen Xiao?

Would they explore Dà Huāng together? Would they even be friends?

Li Lun looked away from Wen Xiao when he felt the imagination of his daughter overlap with the human girl. He flicked his sleeves, turning away from the Dianmu Divine Tree and headed to stand by the steps.

Wen Xiao trotted after him, choosing to stand away. They weren't sure how long Zhao Wan'er's meeting with Ying Zhao was, so they waited in tense silence.

Li Lun's time as Wen Xiao’s babysitter was short, much to his relief. Zhao Wan’er had returned faster than expected. She found the two of them standing away from each other with a large distance in between.

She found it a little amusing but chose not to comment. Wen Xiao perked up at the sight of her. The little human girl ran down the steps and hugged Zhao Wan'er's waist in greeting. Zhao Wan'er returned the hug with a gentle smile.

Li Lun left without a goodbye. The pagoda tree yāo hoped to never babysit the human child again as he returned home. But fate had a better plan for him.

His wish was pointless when Zhao Wan’er had come for him again with Wen Xiao in tow. He doesn't know what he did wrong to be saddle with a human pup.

He’s done his duty as the Great Yāo. He hasn’t killed anyone in a long while. He hasn't descended onto Tiandu with malice. He hasn't sent Ao Yin out to look for Zhu Yan for awhile too. So why is he suddenly tasked as a babysitter again but in his own home this time.

Zhao Wan’er smiled at him, dropping Wen Xiao’s bag in Li Lun’s hand. It felt heavy in his hand and he gripped it tightly.

“There’s a meeting between the Mountain Gods and I. With Wen Xiao being very young still, I can't take her with me,” Zhao Wan’er explained. 

Li Lun frowned at her, thinking she was just making excuses but he knows it was the truth. He hasn’t been fully involved in any of the meetings. The other Mountain Gods haven't fully trusted him yet—besides Zhao Wan'er and Ying Zhao—despite what he's done for them.

Wen Xiao seemed less happy to be near Li Lun and he shared the same sentiments too. He couldn’t refute Zhao Wan’er either and the Baize Goddess nodded at him approvingly before leaving them alone.

They stared at each other again, similar to their first encounter.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Li Lun warned Wen Xiao, dumping her bag onto the groove of the pagoda tree roots. 

He leaped up, disappearing into the thick leaves of his tree without a look back. Wen Xiao could only stare up with wide eyes before she huffed loudly. Li Lun heard her soft mutter of, “Stupid tree,” and he shared the same thoughts too.

“Stupid human," he mumbled, laying on his branch and watched her shuffle on the spot.

Despite his warning, her curiosity won over and she started to explore Li Lun’s home.

"Don’t let her get too close to the edge or she’ll fall," Zhu Yan warned him. 

“Let her fall,” Li Lun replied. “It’ll teach her a lesson to not wander around after being warned.” 

"Really, Li Lun? She’s just a pup and pups get up to mischief without supervision."

“I’m watching over her, aren’t I? If she falls, then good riddance.” 

He heard Zhu Yan's sigh and he turned to his side where Zhu Yan would have been. The spot was empty and his eyes misted over with emotion.

The omega yāo would have taken care of Wen Xiao better than Li Lun. Zhu Yan always seemed to know what to do and say. Li Lun longed for his mate once more.

Wen Xiao’s soft gasp alerted him. He peered over the branch to see her steadying herself from tripping over a root. She quickly brushed her front robe down and continued exploring. 

He watched her with a sharp gaze. She tethered close to the edge where the rushing Yāo waters were. One misstep and she would fall to her death.

Li Lun scoffed at his own heart beating fast when Wen Xiao wobbled too close to the edge for his liking. Maybe somewhere in him, he wanted to see her fall. Maybe he should give her a little push but he felt Zhu Yan’s disappointed gaze on him. He stopped himself from entertaining the idea further.

Of course the little human girl failed to listen to Li Lun’s warning. She slipped on a smooth rock, tipping over the edge. She flailed her arms and fell over. Wen Xiao screamed and Li Lun groaned to himself. 

“Why do human pups never listen?” he grumbled. 

He flicked his fingers and vines shot out, rushing towards the falling human child. He felt his vines snagged around Wen Xiao’s waist and her screaming stopped mid scream. He curled two of his fingers, pulling Wen Xiao up.

He glanced over to see her head popped up from the ledge. He carefully moved his fingers, dragging her above the ground before dumping her onto her bag. Her loud yelp was his answer.

Another flick of his fingers and a large ball of roots and vines was formed around Wen Xiao. He made a caged ball for her.

“Stay there and do not even think of trying to escape. I’ll let you fall next time,” Li Lun warned and he heard Wen Xiao huffed loudly before throwing herself against the root wall. 

He rolled his eyes at her. “Ungrateful brat,” he muttered when Wen Xiao softly spoke.

“Thank you,” she said and Li Lun looked down to see her still in the same position, refusing to meet his eyes. 

Li Lun grunted in acknowledgement and the two fell into an awkward silence. Li Lun leaned further back into his perch and Wen Xiao pulled her bag to rummage through it. 

“You didn't let her fall to her death,” Zhu Yan said. Li Lun felt Zhu Yan's arms wrapped around his waist and a ghostly weight landed on his chest. “You should watch over her more.” 

Li Lun frowned. “I'm not going to watch over the brat,” he muttered, hearing Zhu Yan's soft chuckle against him. “She's human. She's not like our little blossom.” 

“She's still a young pup. Be kinder to her, my alpha.” 

Li Lun sighed softly. He glanced down to where Zhu Yan would be but found no one but himself. Wen Xiao's little voice hummed a soft children's tune. Something only little children would sing.

Li Lun peered over to see her entertaining herself with her books and whatever snacks Zhao Wan’er packed for her. At least she was smart to not escape and he left her alone.

When Zhao Wan’er returned, she wasn't expecting to find her apprentice soundly asleep in a caged ball of roots. Soft mosses pillowed under her head and a handmade blanket stitched with different kinds of cloth was draped over Wen Xiao. 

Zhao Wan'er looked up to find Li Lun leaning against his branches with his eyes closed. She knew he wasn't asleep, merely resting as he would grumble. She approached the ball of roots, hoping Li Lun would release Wen Xiao when the ball opened up like a flower blooming in day. The roots laid silently open and Zhao Wan’er crouched in front of her sleeping apprentice. 

“Wen Xiao,” Zhao Wan'er softly called, shaking Wen Xiao's shoulders. “It's time to go.” 

The little girl slowly woke up, rubbing her eyes sleepily. Zhao Wan'er smiled at her, gathering her things and took Wen Xiao's hand into hers.

Li Lun still had his eyes closed as they quietly made their way to the front of the cave. Wen Xiao suddenly stopped, halting Zhao Wan'er from moving. The little girl turned around, looking up at the pagoda tree and squinted hard.

“Bye bye, tree,” Wen Xiao called and Zhao Wan’er bit her bottom lip to stop herself from laughing. 

“Bye pesky human,” Li Lun said and he opened one eye to watch them leave his home.

~~~~~~

Li Lun strolled through the place he had called home with Zhu Yan before. A place where Li Lun had claimed Zhu Yan as his omega, keeping him close and filling it with Zhu Yan's cries and pleas. And where their daughter used to run around, giggling sweetly.

What stood before him was no longer a home. It's been a long time since he came here and it took him awhile to find it.

Li Lun pushed aside the vines that had taken its claim at the entrance of the cave. Its lush green leaves felt both like a greeting and mockery. He stepped in, letting it fall behind like curtain.

The home was in shambles. Lesser yāos had ransacked their home, taking whatever they could grab and left with gleeful looks on their faces—something Li Lun could picture.

The things he and Zhu Yan had steadily collected over the years were gone and Li Lun felt anger grow in his chest. 

The nest Zhu Yan had built was pulled apart. Soft blankets and cotton silks that Li Lun gifted Zhu Yan were torn into shreds. Pillows sat haphazardly on the stone floor with moss growing on top. Teacups laid shattered and teapots were upturned. 

It didn't look like a home anymore and it didn't smell like one. The scent of peaches and apple blossoms mixed with pagoda flowers and fresh earth used to fill the whole cave, has been replaced with a musty and damp scent.

It no longer smelt like them and Li Lun stood at the centre of the cave. 

He could picture what it used to be like. Their home was always neat and in an organized mess. Zhu Yan's clothes mixed with Li Lun's. A kettle sat boiling in the kitchen with Zhu Yan washing some fresh peaches he had picked. The crackle of firewood warmed the cave, keeping the moisture away. It felt welcoming and warm. 

Li Lun turned to face the entrance, seeing a ghostly past of his younger self carrying a bucket of fresh water, collected from the stream beside their home.

"Li Lun, you're back," Zhu Yan's wide smile greeted him when he sat the bucket next to his mate.

He wrapped an arm around Zhu Yan's waist, eliciting a soft laugh from his mate. Almond shaped eyes softened for him and Li Lun pulled Zhu Yan in for a deep kiss. 

The memory shifted from kissing Zhu Yan to pressing him up against the cave walls. Frenzy hands pulling against their robes and tossing it somewhere in the corner. Li Lun grabbed hold of Zhu Yan's thighs, lifting him up easily in a show of strength and power. It made Zhu Yan gasp and giggle, wrapping his arms around Li Lun's shoulders. 

Their hard cocks rubbed against one another when Li Lun decided they needed to get to their bed. He carried Zhu Yan easily, feeling Zhu Yan's legs wrapped around his waist. Moans from his omega made him shiver and rumble in return. Zhu Yan's cunt dripped with slick and his scent turned heady and thick. 

Zhu Yan parted his legs open, letting his alpha pushed his hard cock into Zhu Yan's awaiting wet cunt. They moaned together and Zhu Yan's cries filled the cave walls with every deep and hard thrust Li Lun gave. Their hands tangled with each other. Messy kisses were given and Li Lun bit every patch of skin he could find on Zhu Yan's body. He marked and claimed the omega underneath him.

The memory faded with the sound of Zhu Yan's cry of Li Lun's name. Li Lun brushed the dust from the stone seat. He sat down, and ghostly images of Zhu Yan, heavily pregnant with their pup, waddling around their home with twitching fingers. Li Lun watched Zhu Yan toss blankets and pillows into one corner. The pregnant omega was fussing over the nest, building it and tearing it down to rebuild it. 

Zhu Yan stuffed some of Li Lun's clothes in corners together with his own robes. A child's stuffed toy in the shape of a misshapen monkey was gently placed in one corner. 

“You shouldn't be moving around so much,” Li Lun chided, crouching next to Zhu Yan to help him lie down. “The pup is due anytime.” 

Zhu Yan chuckled and stroked Li Lun's cheek. “You worry too much, my dear alpha. I just wanted to build our nest.”

Li Lun sighed, knowing better than to argue with a pregnant nesting omega. He climbed in, spooning behind Zhu Yan and heard the loud purr of content.

Li Lun watched the memory change to their little blossom, crawling around the cave with wide eyed wonder. She crawled too close to the hearth and squealed when she was lifted up by Zhu Yan. 

“Cheeky little thing,” he cooed and Li Lun rolled his eyes. 

“And who does she take after?” Li Lun teased but took their daughter into his arms when she reached for him. “You're exactly like your mother.” 

She cooed at him, giggling and bouncing in his arms. Their little blossom was loved. She would hold onto Li Lun's fingers when she learnt how to walk. Crying for Zhu Yan when she was upset or begging Li Lun to rock her or carry her everywhere. 

She was dearly loved by them until they found her lifeless body by the stream. 

Li Lun clenched his hands tightly at the memory, gasping at the hard pain in his chest. It haunted him to see his beloved daughter, lying dead on the ground when she was so full of life. Zhu Yan's agonized screams haunted his heart and mind. It will forever be seared into his body of the immense pain his mate felt—they both felt.

Li Lun groaned from the pain, shaking his head from the memories. Zhu Yan's desperation to hold onto their daughter's body. His vengeance to kill the hunter who killed his daughter. Zhu Yan killing humans and yāos.

Them fighting together and Zhu Yan injuring Li Lun. They were separated and Li Lun was locked in his own home before he was freed.

He fell to his knees, slipping off from the chair. He curled into himself, clutching onto his chest tightly and breathed through the painful memories. His daughter's laughter, Zhu Yan's voice and all the happiness he felt, burned away.

He panted for air, shaking his head. He slowly stood up from his spot, ignoring the ache in his body. He took one last look of his home when he spotted a hair clip on the floor. He went over, kneeling down to pick it up.

It was a peach blossom hair clip. He felt tears burned his eyes. He had bought this for Xiao Hua. She loved the clip so much, always begging Zhu Yan to pin it for her. He clutched onto the clip tightly, breathing in deeply before keeping it away.

He left the cave, stopping in front of it. He lifted his hand, glowing with blue and gold energy. The home he built with Zhu Yan is no more. There's nothing left in that cave and he crushed it with a single blast.

Their memories, grief and loss of their pup would be buried here. Li Lun watched the entrance crumble with sand and stones. The only thing he has left was his daughter's hair clip and he quietly left the destroyed cave to head back to the White Tower.

~~~~~~

Seasons have changed and Li Lun watched it all move. Ao Yin met Wen Xiao and she was sceptical of the human girl. Much to Zhao Wan'er's amusement of seeing Ao Yin making a face, similar to Li Lun's, the two girls formed an unlikely friendship.

"Ao jiejie!" Wen Xiao cried happily, rushing over to hug Ao Yin after she returned from her search for Zhu Yan. "Did find who you were looking for?"

Ao Yin shook her head but she returned with snacks for Wen Xiao. The little girl was delighted and Li Lun rolled his eyes at her.

"One of these days, your teeth will rot and fall," he commented and Wen Xiao huffed at him.

"And you're just a stupid tree who only broods," Wen Xiao argued.

"I will throw you into the river," he argued.

"Make me," Wen Xiao fought back with a small snarl and Ao Yin didn't know who to defend or side with.

Li Lun never threw Wen Xiao into the river. He did toss her into a pond once and Zhao Wan'er scolded him for days. He felt his ear was going to fall off and he begrudgingly apologized to Wen Xiao. He doesn't want to repeat the incident again. He can still hear Zhao Wan'er's scolding in his ears until now.

Li Lun watched Wen Xiao grow from being a child to a cheeky teenager who seemed to enjoy making Li Lun's life ‘miserable’. Despite her attempts, Li Lun would wrap a vine around her mouth.

Her muffled cries would bring Zhao Wan'er over, giving him a disapproving look, like a mother chiding someone. Her apprentice would whine and pout when Li Lun released her.

Zhao Wan'er wasn't sure if Li Lun would physically harm Wen Xiao when he seemed annoyed with the girl. But the pagoda tree yāo has saved Wen Xiao many times whenever he has to look after her. Wen Xiao, despite her attitude with Li Lun, would always run to him for help and the pagoda tree yāo would protect her. 

Their relationship was a strange one and Zhao Wan’er doesn't question it.

He has finally gained the trust of the mountain gods when a rogue yāo appeared. The foaming bear yāo roared at Wen Xiao when she followed them to Mountain Kunlun. He charged straight at her.

"Wen Xiao!" Zhao Wan'er cried out, rushing to pull her apprentice but she was too late. "No!"

Wen Xiao fell back onto her hands. She scrambled backwards with a whimper. Fresh tears filled her eyes with fear.

"Master!" She cried out too and squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for the pain to come.

It never did.

She opened her eyes to find a wall of roots and vines wrapped thickly in front of her. A vine wrapped around her waist, dragging her back and she was tossed into Zhao Wan'er's arms. Wen Xiao clung onto Zhao Wan'er, watching Li Lun hold the bear yāo in a tight grip of roots and the golden inscriptions of the Baize Token.

"Zhao Wan'er," Li Lun called and Zhao Wan'er gently pushed Wen Xiao into Ying Zhao's arms.

Zhao Wan'er stood next to Li Lun with the Baize Flute ready. She played the tune and Li Lun binded the bear yāo. They sent the bear yāo to a life of imprisonment and Li Lun watched it all with a detached look in his eyes.

He closed his eyes when it ended, feeling the Baize Token power disappear. He left without a word to anyone, heading away that isn't the White Tower. He didn't see Wen Xiao reaching for him nor did he hear her soft, "Li Lun, come back."

He disappeared for a few days, needing to clear his head from the incident. It felt the same when he was imprisoned and the scars still run deep in his body. It was a painful reminder for him and it was the first time Zhao Wan'er waited for him to return to the White Tower.

"The Mountain Gods decided you are fit for the duty and are allowed to attend the meetings if needed," Zhao Wan'er said and Li Lun nodded.

He took to his duties well, attending meetings if needed but he mostly tuned them out. Whatever input he gave was met with understanding and nods. Li Lun would secretly roll his eyes but he stayed longer to sit with Ying Zhao after the meetings.

The few times they had to bind and imprison yāos whose punishment was severe, Li Lun would disappear for a few days.  

In those few days, Zhao Wan'er would wait for his return with a warm welcoming smile. Wen Xiao would fidget in her spot beside Zhao Wan’er, waiting for Li Lun too. The pagoda tree yāo felt perturbed by their actions but it slowly grew on him.

He returned to them, silently ruffling Wen Xiao's head. “Pesky human,” he called to her, never saying her name and tossed something at her. 

Wen Xiao fumbled, catching the object and looked down. A plump peach sat in the curve of her palms. The sweet scent of the fruit made her mouth watered and she beamed at Li Lun with a wide smile.

Li Lun glanced at her, walking straight into the White Tower without a word and Wen Xiao chased after him. Zhao Wan'er chuckled lightly, following them when Li Lun turned towards her. 

She blinked at him and he placed something into her palm. He disappeared somewhere deeper into the tower after giving his gift. Zhao Wan'er looked down and her smile softened at the sight of a hairpin. 

It was rare for Li Lun to gift them things and she treasured each gift.

Li Lun sat in his room in the tower, sighing to himself. He felt Zhao Wan'er's presence before he saw her. She glided into the room like the goddess she is and sat down at the stone chair. Li Lun had prepared cups of tea for them and Zhao Wan'er hummed in thanks. 

“There's a human,” she said, picking up her teacup and scenting the sweet floral scent of jasmine and osmanthus. “That has been enquiring about you.”

Li Lun frowned at her. “A human? About Me? Why?” He gruffled said, willow shaped eyes narrowing. “The only human I know who is pesky enough is your apprentice.” 

“She has a name,” Zhao Wan'er politely said but knew the answer would be a scoff and an eye roll. Li Lun and Wen Xiao always acted like siblings and Zhao Wan'er found it humorous. “He never said why. Just that if I have heard of your name.” 

“When did he arrive?” 

“A few days after you left.” Zhao Wan'er set the teacup down and frowned. “Li Lun,” her tone sounded important and he gave her his full attention. “He asked if you were alive and if you had a mate before.” 

Li Lun's eyes flashed a green gold glow in warning. “My mate is dead,” he hissed and Zhao Wan'er’s mouth opened but Li Lun cut her off. “The bond is dead and we've been separated for four thousand years, Zhao Wan’er.” 

“I didn't answer him,” she told him and his gaze softened slightly. “But he will return again. He's been searching for you in Dà Huāng and in the mortal realm.” 

Li Lun glanced away. His thoughts started playing with him and he wondered why a single human was looking for him.

Why would a human even bother to know if he's alive and is enquiring about his mate?

Zhu Yan is gone, despite his efforts and Ao Yin's to find him. Li Lun clenched his hands tightly. 

“His name?” 

Zhao Wan'er toyed with her teacup. “One of the Zhuo clan. He carries the Yún Guāng sword with him. I don't know his name and he hasn't introduced himself.” 

“Where is he?”

“Back at the mortal realm.” 

Li Lun stood up from his seat.

“Li Lun, don't,” Zhao Wan'er warned him. He glanced over his shoulder to see her looking at him worriedly.

“I won't do anything stupid,” he said, leaving in a swirl of pagoda leaves. He landed in front of Mount Kunlun's entrance. 

It was the only place that holds the portal to cross between the two realms. Li Lun climbed up the snowy steps and headed in. He needed to find Ying Zhao when he heard Ying Zhao's old amused chuckle. An unfamiliar voice spoke after and Li Lun hid himself behind one of the larger walls. 

The scent of sandalwood and cedarwood was faint in the air, mixing nicely with the scent of snow from the mountains. Li Lun felt slightly drawn to the scent like it reminded him of the lusher green forest in Dà Huāng where the other tree yāos reside. 

He peered around the corner, just to satisfy his curiosity—Wen Xiao is rubbing off on him—and he caught a glimpse of a young man, older than Wen Xiao with a high half ponytail. The sword in his hand, Yún Guāng Sword, was the famous sword that all yāos feared.

Li Lun saw the crystal glowed blue, sensing his presence.

The Zhuo glanced down at the sword and immediately looked behind him. Li Lun pulled himself back before he was caught and disappeared into Ying Zhao's quarters. The pagoda tree yāo flicked his long sleeves with a soft sigh when a whimper caught his attention.

A crib sat in Ying Zhao's hall and little chubby arms waved up in the air with another whimper. Li Lun grew curious, approaching cautiously until he peered down into the crib. A baby yāo laid in the crib, blinking large eyes up at Li Lun. The baby’s whimpers turned into little gurgles. 

Chubby arms and wiggling fingers tried to grasp at Li Lun's hair. The pagoda tree yāo's eyes softened for the baby, summoning a baby rattle. It was worn and old but still usable. He twirled the rattle in his hand and the little beads drummed against the base. The baby squealed delightfully, trying to reach for the toy. Li Lun handed it to the baby. 

He sat by the crib, slowly rocking it just as the baby shook the rattle. The continuous beat of the rattle brought old memories of Xiao Hua rattling the toy. She would squeal loudly at Zhu Yan, shaking the toy hard to get his attention and blowing spit bubbles too. 

His mate would laugh at her, wiping her drooling lips and chin before pressing a sweet kiss to her forehead. She giggled, grabbing Zhu Yan's hair and tugged on it, forgetting about her toy to play with her mother. 

The rattle continued to beat, bringing Li Lun's attention back to the present. He looked up to find Ying Zhao casually entering his home and slowly sat down beside the crib. They didn't say anything to each other with only the sound of the rattle and the baby’s giggling. 

“Whose child is this?” Li Lun asked, watching the baby. 

“My grandson,” Ying Zhao replied, chuckling at his grandson. “Ying Lei, do you like that toy?” 

Ying Lei shook the toy hard, giggling away and stared up at Li Lun with bright eyes.

“The young man has left,” Ying Zhao said, gently wiping Ying Lei’s drooling chin with a soft cloth. “He asked about you.” 

“I've heard,” Li Lun said, looking away to glare at the wall. “Why is the wielder of Yún Guāng Sword inquiring about me? Even Zhao Wan’er mentioned him just now."

“He wanted to know about Zhu Yan's mate.” Ying Zhao glanced at Li Lun, scenting the air where pagoda flowers turned sharp and the earth smelt moist. “Li Lun.” 

“Zhu Yan is dead,” Li Lun softly snarled, mindful of Ying Lei. “Our bond is gone and I don't know where he was last seen.” 

Ying Zhao sighed. “Zhu Yan is still alive,” he said softly and Li Lun shook his head. 

“If he was still alive, then why is our bond dead? What other explanation is there? I've searched for him and found nothing. Ying Zhao, I can hardly remember what his scent was and I'm seeing ghosts of him.” 

“My dear child,” Ying Zhao patted Li Lun's shoulder. “The treaty between Zhu Yan and the Zhuo clan is still being upheld. It means he's still alive. Without the treaty, Dà Huāng would have been in distress."

"What's the point of a treaty if it means being ripped away from my own mate?"

"Time and fate has been unkind to the both of you.” 

Li Lun's shoulders sank. The scent of tea tree and peppermint was calming and Li Lun always felt better whenever he scented Ying Zhao's scent. The old mountain god cooed at his grandson and Li Lun stood up.

“He can keep the rattle. It's better than lying somewhere collecting dust,” Li Lun told Ying Zhao with a soft look in his eyes at Ying Lei. “I'll take my leave now.” He bowed, ready to leave. 

“His name,” Ying Zhao said, halting Li Lun. “Is Zhuo Yixuan.” 

~~~~~~

The first time Li Lun met Zhuo Yixuan was when a certain Baize Goddess apprentice went missing. The pagoda tree yāo growled to himself when he stepped foot into the mortal realm.

Zhao Wan'er had sent Li Lu to look for Wen Xiao when the teenager didn't return to Zhao Wan’er’s side after their very short trip to the mortal realm. The reason they went was because a yāo had caused mayhem, stealing from the human traders and Zhao Wan'er went to investigate.

Wen Xiao followed her dutifully. She went off exploring the market after she was given free time. The teenager didn't return at the designated hour and Zhao Wan’er grew worried. 

Zhao Wan'er returned with a frazzled look. It alarmed Li Lun and even Ao Yin. Li Lun ordered Ao Yin to stay in case Wen Xiao returned and he left to find her in Tiandu.

“When I find her,” Li Lun growled, making his way through the crowd of humans. “I'm going to lock her in a ball of roots and dangle her from the Dianmu Divine Tree.” 

“Isn't that a bit harsh?” Li Lun heard Zhu Yan's voice in his ear.

He glanced to his side, seeing the ghostly image of Zhu Yan walking beside him. His silver hair was braided into a ponytail. The human form he takes whenever he heads to the mortal realm.

“She's never stepped foot in the mortal realm in so long. Let her have some fun.” 

“The definition of fun is making Zhao Wan’er worried. That girl can't tell who is dangerous and who's not.” 

“And who didn't teach her how to tell the difference?” Zhu Yan pointed out. “You were always telling our little girl what to look out for.” 

“That's different,” Li Lun hissed to the imaginative Zhu Yan who hummed. “That pesky human isn't our child. She's worse than Xiao Hua and I always have to clean up that pesky human's messes." 

Zhu Yan chuckled. “But it hasn't stopped you from saving her. Stop denying yourself, Li Lun. You care for the human pup, otherwise you wouldn't give her a nickname.” 

“Pesky human is hardly a nickname,” Li Lun pointed out. “At least she responds to it.” He heard some commotion from up ahead and he narrowed his eyes. “And a trouble magnet.” 

He quickly made his way to a small crowd of people. He spotted Wen Xiao in the middle of the crowd. Her wrist was held tightly in a man’s grip and Li Lun felt the burning anger surged in his chest.

How dare this lowly human touch his pesky human!

The imaginative Zhu Yan grinned at Li Lun’s silent rage and watched the alpha yāo make his way through the crowd. 

Wen Xiao struggled against the man’s grip. She had her own glare directed at him and her pretty face was twisted into a snarl. Very unladylike. She stomped her foot against the man’s foot and yanked her hand out from his loosened grip. She threw a punch and it landed directly into the man’s eye, missing his nose. 

Li Lun smirked at the man's pain. He felt proud for a moment. At least she knew how to defend herself a little bit.

“I didn’t steal from you!” Wen Xiao yelled. “You didn’t see who stole it and put the blame on me just because I was standing in front of your stall. Did anyone see what I stole from him?” 

The crowd murmured, looking at each other and nodding. Li Lun was almost close to her when a young man stepped forward. His face was gentle and his smile was welcoming but his eyes held the sharp look of someone to be respected. His scent was calming–sandalwood and cedarwood–that made Li Lun’s eyes narrowed dangerously.

He knew who this was. 

The young Zhuo who visited Ying Zhao.

Li Lun stopped at the edge, waiting to see what would happen.

Zhu Yan whistled. “Oh? Someone decided to save your little human pup. Shouldn’t you enter and grab her before it’s too late?” 

Li Lun didn’t reply, wanting to see the scene unfold. Zhuo Yixuan stepped beside Wen Xiao and Li Lun tensed. His fingers twitched, itching to summon his vines to grab Wen Xiao and pull her to his side.

Zhuo Yixuan smiled at Wen Xiao, gently handing her a clean handkerchief and she looked at it with scepticism. At least the girl was smart enough to be wary. 

“Miss,” Zhuo Yixuan said politely. “For you to wipe your hands.” Then he turned to the stall vendor with a sharp look. “Sir, the thief that stole your stack of merchandise ran that way. Fortunately, we manage to upend the culprit. A little thieving yāo.” 

Gasps and murmurs spread around the crowd like wildfire. Li Lun glanced at each one of them but willed himself to stay put. His gaze shifted towards Wen Xiao who looked ready to fight with Zhuo Yixuan. Zhu Yan leaned against Li Lun’s shoulder, wrapping an arm around Li Lun’s and hummed. 

“This might be interesting. The little thief they caught was the one Zhao Wan’er brought back to Dà Huāng. I wonder…”

“Accusing a lady without proof is unbecoming of a gentleman's manner, sir,” Zhuo Yixuan smiled and the stall merchant looked sheepish. “I believe the lady deserves an apology, no?”

“I wouldn’t want to get on his bad side. I wonder what he’ll do if we make him angry enough.”

“Shut up,” Li Lun hissed quietly and he gained two odd looks from the people around him.

Zhu Yan chuckled and Li Lun felt his weight disappear. He refused to look but kept his gaze on Wen Xiao.

The stall merchant stammered out an apology and Wen Xiao nodded curtly. Zhuo Yixuan waved the crowd away and he turned to her with a softer smile. Wen Xiao stared up at him with wide doe eyes. 

“Are you alright, miss?” Zhuo Yixuan asked and he spotted the forming bruise on her wrist. “You’re injured.” 

Wen Xiao flinched from his fingers, taking a step back. She looked frightened and her eyes darted everywhere, looking to escape.

Li Lun sighed, sensing her courage diffused immediately. She stumbled over her words in front of Zhuo Yixuan like a shy girl.

“Wen Xiao,” Li Lun called and Wen Xiao twirled around with wide eyes at him. “Come.” 

Wen Xiao ran towards his side, grabbing his hand and he felt the small trembles in her grip. The adrenaline was wearing off and Li Lun huffed in annoyance. Zhao Wan’er wouldn’t be pleased about the bruise either.

Li Lun curled his fingers around her fingers, squeezing her hand tightly. He nodded at Zhuo Yixuan. Li Lun eyed Yún Guāng Sword in Zhuo Yixuan’s grip and turned around, dragging Wen Xiao with him. 

Just as Li Lun was far away, he dropped the spell that hid his yāo energy. He didn’t say a word and neither did Wen Xiao.

The stalls got fewer in numbers and the crowd had lessened the further they went. They crossed past the archway gates and followed the dirt path that led them away from Tiandu. They moved fast and Li Lun didn't want to know if Zhuo Yixuan was following them. 

When there wasn’t anyone around, Li Lun pulled Wen Xiao close to his side, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and they disappeared in a swirl of pagoda leaves. They landed at the entrance of the White Tower and Li Lun turned his glare onto Wen Xiao.

He flicked a finger on her forehead, ignoring her loud whine of pain and grabbed her injured wrist. He poured yāo energy onto the wound, healing it and the bruise was gone. 

“Stupid pesky human,” Li Lun growled and Wen Xiao flinched at his angry tone, knowing she was in trouble. “Do you have any idea what you nearly caused? Where’s that sense of danger you’re supposed to have? Do I need to come and save you every time you cause trouble? Zhao Wan’er is worried about you and you decided to wander off without returning back to the designated place.” Li Lun scolded her. 

“I was only looking for new books to read,” Wen Xiao tried to reason but she flinched again when Li Lun flicked his sleeve. 

“If your brain was a book with pages, it would be all empty. No sense of danger, no sense of direction. If I hadn’t stepped in, what would that human boy do to you? Not every human is nice like him.” 

Wen Xiao kept quiet, letting Li Lun scold her like an angry mother before he clicked his tongue.

“Zhao Wan’er was worried sick. Pull that stunt one more time and I’ll cage you in a ball of roots and dangle you from the Dianmu Divine Tree, understand?” he threatened. 

Wen Xiao nodded. She looked up at Li Lun with wide eyes.

“You called my name back there,” she said with an awed look then she looked away shyly. “Can I call you Li Lun?” 

“No,” Li Lun answered immediately. “I only called your name because I do not want to give my identity away. Not when that man is carrying that sword.” 

Wen Xiao looked confused. “What sword? The pretty sword with the crystal top?” 

“Remember that sword, pesky human. Yún Guāng Sword is not to be played with and so it’s wielder. If you ever hear the family name Zhuo, do not talk to them, understand.” 

“Yún Guāng…Bing Yi’s sword?” Wen Xiao asked. “The sword that all yāos fear?”

He nodded. “Go before I change my mind and decide to cage you right now and dangle you from the tree.”

Wen Xiao immediately scampered off. “Bye Li Lun. Thank you for saving me!” she yelled from the front entrance just as Zhao Wan’er walked out to see. 

Li Lun clicked his tongue at her and left the two women alone. He felt a headache forming and the beginning of his cycle starting. It would be an agonizing few days to deal with his rut. He headed straight to his home, closing the entrance with tightly weaved roots and branches. 

It was going to get a very long week for him.

Chapter Text

His rut cycle without Zhu Yan to help him was agonizing. The pain seared through his body, making his blood boil and he growled at the ache in his hard cock. No matter how many times he furiously stroked his aching cock and brought himself to another round of a weak orgasm, it wouldn’t take the edge off.

His cock weakly spurted cum. His knot inflated, making his cock twitch with a pulse of cum but it still felt the deep urge to fuck someone.

Li Lun laid back down on his bed, ignoring his still throbbing cock and closed his eyes. 

It’s been so long since he laid with Zhu Yan and his cycle never got easier. Mated pairs when separated would have hard ruts and heats to endure. The pain and ache they felt would drive them mad and the desperation to fill that emptiness in their souls.

Sometimes those madness would cause fatal deaths. It was never easy.

Li Lun has endured that pain for so many years. 

Each time his rut cycle started, he would curl into himself, hoping the cycle ends soon. In these moments, Li Lun's imagination decided to help him in a way he knew was unhealthy but he desperately needed something to help with his rut.

He dove deep in his memories, bringing out particular memories that was seared deep in his soul. His mind brought him back to the time when he and Zhu Yan fell into bed together. A time where their heat and rut cycle synced up as one. The night that Li Lun made Zhu Yan cry his name out in the caves walls.

A faint touch to his chest jolted Li Lun awake. There shouldn't be anyone in here. It's only him. He looked up to find Zhu Yan leaning above him with a playful smile. His omega whose hair was spilling over his shoulder in red tresses.

Zhu Yan looked beautiful and Li Lun felt his heart soar at the imagination.

“Are you in need of some help?” Zhu Yan asked, placing his hand on Li Lun's cheek and the alpha leaned into the touch.

“Obviously,” he growled with his cock twitching in need. “Desperately so.” 

Zhu Yan chuckled. “Then let me help you. It won't be the same as the real thing but it'll be close enough, my love.” 

Li Lun nodded, letting himself feel the ghostly lips of Zhu Yan's pressing against his. Li Lun moaned softly, feeling the faint weight of Zhu Yan crawling on top of his body and deepening the kiss in the way Li Lun loved.

Li Lun reached up to touch Zhu Yan but the imaginative Zhu Yan pulled away. Li Lun softly whined at the loss. He wanted to touch Zhu Yan.

“No touching,” Zhu Yan said. “You can do that for me, right, my alpha?” 

Li Lun groaned, nodding minutely. “Zhu Yan,” he whispered his mate’s name, feeling light kisses pressing up against his throat. 

Zhu Yan's touch continued further down, nipping sharply on Li Lun's nipples and abs. His little nips changed into light kisses and his breath ghosted over the dip of Li Lun’s hips until he reached for Li Lun’s hard cock, dripping with precum.

The tip of the cock head was an angry red. Li Lun let out a soft whimper when Zhu Yan pressed a light kiss to the tip, flicking his tongue out to taste a little bit.

“You're so hard and wet,” Zhu Yan purred. “So eager for me. What do you want, Li Lun?” 

“I want you to suck me off,” Li Lun panted with his eyes still closed, picturing Zhu Yan’s smile. 

“Of course, my love. Just stay like this and remember, no touching.” 

Li Lun could see the image before him. How pretty his omega looked with his lips wrapped around Li Lun's throbbing cock. Pink lips that stretched to fit around the cock head with a hooded gaze.

Zhu Yan would lick the cock head as if it was a hard candy, toying with the slit with his tongue. He eagerly licked the precum Li Lun produced, drinking ever bit like a hungry yāo.

Zhu Yan moaned, sending Li Lun's cock twitching with desire and Zhu Yan lowered himself down. He took Li Lun's cock as much as he could into his throat. 

In Li Lun's imagination, his hand fisted into Zhu Yan's hair, tugging on the strands. Fingers tangling with red locks and tears beading in the corner of Zhu Yan's eyes, making his red eyes shimmer like red rubies.

Li Lun thrusted his hips upwards, forcing Zhu Yan to take more of him. He pushed Zhu Yan's head further down until Zhu Yan's nose was buried in Li Lun's pubic bone. 

A loud groan and praise fell from the alpha's lips along with a muffled moan from the omega. 

Li Lun could feel the wet heat of Zhu Yan's tongue playing with the underside of Li Lun's cock. He moaned loudly, tightening his fist in Zhu Yan's hair when Zhu Yan gave a hard suck. Li Lun couldn't stop himself, wanting to chase after the building pleasure. He thrusted his hips up, pushing his cock deeper until he felt the tip of his cock touching the back of Zhu Yan's throat.

A hard suck was enough to make him cum with a loud groan. Zhu Yan swallowed Li Lun's cum, drinking each spurt like drinking wine from a flask.

The wet heat Li Lun felt was pleasurably good. He opened his eyes, finding himself to be alone. He glanced down at his softening cock. His hand was wrapped around his own cock, covered in his own cum. 

“Fuck,” Li Lun groaned. It was nothing but a dream that made him cum and he felt alone all of a sudden.

He forced himself out of his nest, heading towards the water basin and washed his dirty hand. He felt a cold hug pressing up against his back. He knew who it was.

“Was it good? Was I good?” Zhu Yan purred into his ear.

Li Lun pursed his lips tightly, refusing to answer.

He told himself he shouldn't be indulging his imagination. But he missed his mate terribly that he's sinking into this desperate imagination.

The imaginative Zhu Yan sighed loudly, sounding disappointed at Li Lun's lack of response. The cold weight on Li Lun's back was gone. The alpha yāo didn't realize how tensed his whole body was until he felt his shoulders slowly relaxed. 

He tossed the dirty water onto the ground and refilled the basin with fresh water. He poured himself a cup of cold water and drank it. The icy water cooled the flames in him but it did nothing to stop his rut.

He ran a hand through his hair, untangling some of the messy strands that got caught in the golden hair beads. He grumbled to himself, untying the strings and dumping it onto the table.

Exhaustion started to set in his body. He sighed tiredly, heading for his nest. He leapt up, landing softly on the soft nest and curled onto the sheets that smelt mostly of him.

He wanted the mixed scent of his and Zhu Yan’s. The wonderful blend of peaches and apple blossoms with pagoda flowers and fresh earth. It made the nest feel more welcoming and homely.

He closed his eyes, picturing Zhu Yan lying next to him. The white ape yāo brushed Li Lun's cheek with a gentle touch. Zhu Yan's soft smile and his almond shaped eyes softened just for Li Lun.

The alpha yāo wrapped his arms around Zhu Yan's waist, pulling him close to his chest and nuzzled Zhu Yan's hair. Zhu Yan's giggles were sweet and fresh, like drinking sweet fresh water from the stream near their home. 

A memory that happened with Li Lun draping himself over Zhu Yan's shoulders and ignored the soft grumbling. It was one of their peaceful moments.

Li Lun dreamt of taking Zhu Yan into their nest with lips kissing each other furiously. Li Lun spread Zhu Yan's cunt open with familiar fingers. Zhu Yan's soft pleas and cries spilling from his mouth was music to Li Lun's ears.

Zhu Yan begged Li Lun to go faster and the alpha would thrust his fingers in. His rhythm was hard and deep, going as far as he could go.

“Li Lun, Li Lun, Li Lun!” Zhu Yan cried his name in different pitches. 

Tears of pleasure spilled from his pleasure clouded eyes and Li Lun pulled his fingers out to bury his hard cock in Zhu Yan's stretched cunt. Soft moans turned guttural and Zhu Yan's eyes fluttered closed, tilting his head back to expose more of his neck.

Li Lun buried his nose into Zhu Yan's neck. He nosed at the marked scent gland and gave sweet nibbles to it. 

He tasted sweet peaches blooming on his tongue and the light scent of apple blossoms filling his lungs. Li Lun moaned against Zhu Yan's neck and slowly dragged his cock out, letting Zhu Yan feel each slow push and pull.

Zhu Yan clenched around Li Lun's cock, moaning loudly at the slow pace. He tossed his head side to side, feeling the slowness was too much.

The tight wet heat enveloped Li Lun's cock was heavenly. 

Li Lun groaned, shifting to pull his cock out before slowly pushing it back in, inch by inch.

Zhu Yan choked on his moan, reaching up to grip onto Li Lun's forearms to steady himself. 

“Fuck, fuck. Fuck, how are you so big?” Zhu Yan gasped but he spread his legs wider to accommodate for Li Lun's hips. “Ah, ah, ah, Li Lun. Oh gods…don't…faster…” 

Li Lun chuckled. “Which do you want? For me to stop or for me to go faster?” 

“I…don't…ah, ah right there! Ah, ah!” Zhu Yan shook his head, unable to choose and he screamed when Li Lun decided to go with a sudden hard deep thrust.

Li Lun grabbed each of Zhu Yan's legs and threw them over his shoulders. Li Lun pulled Zhu Yan down by his hips until Li Lun's cock was buried to the hilt.

Zhu Yan's moans were loud, echoing against their home walls. Li Lun changed his pace, going for a harder and faster rhythm until the sound of skin slapping skin was bouncing off the cave walls.

Wet squelching filled in too. It made Zhu Yan blush a deep red. It sounded obscene when the squelching was louder than Zhu Yan's moans. It brought a burning embarrassment to Zhu Yan. It made Zhu Yan suddenly self conscious, thinking that any yāo would be able to hear their loud coupling.

He covered his face with his arms but Li Lun stopped him. Li Lun pulled Zhu Yan's arms away, letting him see Zhu Yan's embarrassed expression.

“Let them hear you,” Li Lun purred. “So they'll know that you are mine and no one can take you away from me.”

Zhu Yan cried out loudly when his cock was grabbed. Li Lun's hand was immediately smeared with precum leaking from the tip of Zhu Yan's cock. It made the slide of Li Lun's hand on Zhu Yan's cock easier, making it felt good for the omega.

Li Lun's knot was starting to form. It rubbed against the tight wet walls of Zhu Yan's cunt. 

Zhu Yan's limbs trembled with twitching muscles and toes curling from the burning pleasure. He felt his cock leaked with more precum than before. Slick was oozing out, dripping around Li Lun's thrusting cock and onto the bedsheets.

“You're so wet, my sweet omega. Are you that excited to have my seed in you? Waiting to be plump and round with a pup?” Li Lun whispered into Zhu Yan's ears, thrusting faster and harder.

His knot grew larger, catching against the stretched rim of Zhu Yan's cunt until he couldn't pull his cock out. It tugged snugly for Zhu Yan to moan.

Li Lun gave a few shallow thrusts while stroking Zhu Yan's cock at the same time. Li Lun could feel Zhu Yan's walls clenching around his cock, sucking him in until he felt Zhu Yan's cock twitched in his hand.

Li Lun knew Zhu Yan was close. He looked down, finding tears streaming down Zhu Yan's cheeks and his eyes were glazed with pleasure. Zhu Yan's hair laid around him like a red halo, looking beautiful with a red flush standing out from his pale skin.

Zhu Yan was biting his bottom lip, preventing himself from screaming. The look of pure pleasure etched on Zhu Yan's face was seared into Li Lun's mind. It was a sight that only Li Lun was able to see. Only him and no one else.

Li Lun nipped against Zhu Yan’s ear lobe before moving to kiss him. His sweet omega moaned into the kiss, earning a shiver between them.

Li Lun pulled away with his lips hovering centimetres away from Zhu Yan's.

“Cum for me," Li Lun whispered, bringing Zhu Yan to an orgasm.

Zhu Yan arched his back, pressing his chest against Li Lun's when Li Lun claimed his lips in a deep kiss. His alpha squeezed his cock, swiping a thumb over the drooling cock head and toyed with the slit. It was enough to make Zhu Yan cum.

Zhu Yan's cunt gushed out slick and Li Lun pushed his cock deeper in until Zhu Yan thought he felt Li Lun's cock head pressing against Zhu Yan's womb.

The new sensation brought Zhu Yan squirting around Li Lun's throbbing cock. Li Lun groaned, cumming with large spurts of cum filling Zhu Yan's womb with the promise of a pup.

They both moaned together. Zhu Yan panted for air and Li Lun grinded his hips, feeling his cock twitch and cum spurted out again. His knot locked them tightly together and it'll be awhile before Li Lun could pull himself out.

Zhu Yan wrapped his arms around Li Lun's neck, letting his legs slip off with a pained groan. 

“I feel like you're going to break my spine,” Zhu Yan whined but he moaned again at the feeling of more cum filling him up. “Are you that eager to put a pup in me?” 

“I'll stuff something else into your mouth when our cycle starts again,” Li Lun threatened and Zhu Yan grinned. “Just shut up and wait until my knot goes down.” 

“I didn't say anything else,” Zhu Yan grumbled but he shifted his grip to cup Li Lun's cheeks and kissed him deeply. “My alpha, my mate,” Zhu Yan purred, hugging him tightly. 

~~~~~~

Li Lun moaned, leaning further back into the nest to watch Zhu Yan bounce in his lap. His omega was lost to his heat, rocking his hips and crying softly as he chased after his climbing orgasm.

Zhu Yan’s face was flushed red and the sight of his dusky nipples stood erect. Li Lun slid his hand up against Zhu Yan's abdomen, tracing the dips of his abs and up to his chest where he flicked the hard nipples. 

Zhu Yan whined softly and his cock drooled heavily with precum. Zhu Yan's precum dripped over Li Lun's own abdomen, letting the pearlescent liquid roll down the grooves of his muscles. If fell over letting itself be soaked up by the bedsheets. 

Zhu Yan groaned, rocking his hips faster and bouncing harder in Li Lun's lap. He threw his head back, exposing his neck for his alpha.

Li Lun groaned at the sight. He reached up to wrap his hand around that beautiful throat. He placed his fingers against the fluttering pulse and squeezed Zhu Yan’s neck. The gasp followed by a low guttural moan told Li Lun he had hit the spot for his omega. 

He released Zhu Yan's throat, giving him a few minutes to breathe and squeezed again. Zhu Yan shuddered, clenching hard around Li Lun's cock until he cummed all of a sudden. His cock shot ropes of cum against his own chest and Li Lun's abdomen. His cunt spazzed, gushing out more slick with Li Lun's cum.

Li Lun released Zhu Yan’s throat before grasping Zhu Yan's hips and rolled them over. Zhu Yan’s face was pressed into the pillows and his hips were propped hips. The position exposed his dripping slick cunt. 

“I'm not done yet,” Li Lun growled, grinding his hips to let Zhu Yan feel his own hard cock. "You haven't made me cum. Tsk, such an undeserving omega."

Li Lun fucked Zhu Yan without any mercy.

He ignored the loud wailing or the way Zhu Yan cried in pleasure into the sheets. Li Lun found the sight to be extremely pretty. He knew Zhu Yan could take another round and he will bring Zhu Yan into another round of hard orgasm.

Li Lun's pace was hard and fast. He felt his orgasm approaching, judging from his growing knot. He grinned, feeling close and he continued to drive his cock deeper until his knot locked them together. 

Li Lun leaned forward, groaning with his twitching cock and a flood of hot cum filled Zhu Yan up. Li Lun bit hard on Zhu Yan’s marked scent gland. It brought the omega yāo into a hard round of climax.

Zhu Yan’s loud cry jolted Li Lun awake.

The pagoda tree yāo laid in his nest, panting hard. His eyes were wide and darting around. He wasn't in his home with Zhu Yan.

He was in his birthplace. He own home. He took a deep breath before wrinkling his nose at his own scent of sex and rut. He looked down to find he had cummed and his knot was throbbing in the open air. He groaned when his cock twitched with spurts of cum shooting from the tip. 

He actually cummed from a dream.

“Fuck,” Li Lun huffed, grabbing his cock and slowly stroked himself. 

He's going to hate this cycle. He wished for it to end faster. 

It took a few more days of agonizing torture of dreaming and fucking into his own hand for his rut to end. When his rut ended, he was exhausted and unwilling to move from his nest.

He wanted to sleep for a week but Zhao Wan’er had called for him urgently through a paper bird messenger. It was something Ao Yin has come up with.

A technique that allowed them to pour a little bit of yāo energy into a paper and transformed in into a bird. It could travel for miles until it reached the destination.

A panther yāo had gone mad with grief after losing her mate to a demon hunter. Zhao Wan'er couldn't suppress the yāo herself and needed Li Lun's help.

Zhao Wan'er's message sounded urgent and needed him to use the Baize Token. He sighed loudly, pushing himself off and nearly tumbled out from the nest. He managed to wash himself clean but his post rut scent was still thick. He slipped on a pair of clean clothes and quickly headed to the White Tower in a swirl of pagoda leaves.

When he arrived, stepping through the open doors, he froze at the scent of sandalwood and cedarwood.

A bright blue glow caught his attention and so did the sword’s owner.

Li Lun knew who it was. He doesn't need any words to say. Zhuo Yixuan slowly turned around to see Li Lun. Li Lun took in the sight in front of him.

Zhuo Yixuan was dressed in gold and whites. His half ponytail was tied neatly with a hair pin and hair cuff. He stood tall with strength covering him. Yún Guāng Sword was held in one hand with the tip of the sword resting against the panther yāo's shoulder.

The rogue panther yāo knelt in between Zhuo Yixuan and Zhao Wan'er. Wen Xiao stood behind Zhao Wan’er, clutching onto her sleeves like a scared child.

Li Lun felt his instincts rose high. The need to protect Wen Xiao from Zhuo Yixuan was strong. He clenched his fists tightly, ignoring Zhuo Yixuan as he headed towards Zhao Wan’er.

The Baize Goddess nodded at Li Lun and she glanced down at the panther yāo with a pitiful gaze. 

“I'm sorry for your loss but what you did is unacceptable. Leaving Dà Huāng and killing a human child is an unforgivable act,” Zhao Wan’er said and Li Lun could see the pure grief and remorse on the yāo’s face. 

He understood her feelings. Losing a mate wasn't easy. It never was.

Li Lun was probably lucky that he hadn't gone mad in his prison. The panther yāo slowly blinked her eyes, staring at the floor with an air of grief and defeat.

Li Lun noticed the mating mark. It looked fresh like it was a few days old. He figured their bond hadn't fully settled yet. It's what caused her madness and there was no hope in saving her.

A fresh bond is unstable and it needs for a few weeks before it settles. It's why Li Lun always kept Zhu Yan by his side and in the nest. Mated mates are protective of one another.

But mates who lost one another through death when the bonds are fresh, would drive themselves mad to suicide. It is a sad death.

Li Lun knew a better way than imprisoning her. 

Zhao Wan'er has a soft heart but Li Lun already knew what her final decision. She looked at him and nodded.

Wen Xiao clung onto Zhao Wan'er’s arm with hot tears in her eyes. Her soft whimpers broke Zhao Wan'er's gaze to comfort her quietly.

Zhuo Yixuan looked puzzled by their actions. He sensed something was happening but knew nothing.

Li Lun was going to show him what the punishment Li Lun was going to give.

The panther yāo slowly looked up when Li Lun approached her. She smelt his post rut and her gaze landed on his old scarred mating mark when his collar slipped open. Her gaze went back to him and she knew what would become of her.

In that moment, she bowed her head in apology.

Li Lun gave her a moment and she sat up straight with a nod. He placed his hands around her neck, feeling her pulse.

She tried to stay still but she snarled at him when he touched her bond mark. Her bond flared up and he used that moment to immediately snap her neck. 

Zhuo Yixuan cried out at Li Lun with wide eyes. Wen Xiao sobbed loudly and Zhao Wan'er closed her eyes.

The panther yāo slumped in Li Lun's hold. He summoned a dagger. His eyes glowed with the Truth Eye—Zhu Yan's last gift to him—and located where her inner core was. He stabbed her chest, deep and hard.

The blade broke the core and he sent a pulse of his yāo energy. He felt it shatter from the low detecting spell.

Li Lun gently laid the panther yāo, closing her eyes and her body started to break into dust particles.

Zhuo Yixuan stood stunned, unable to say anything. All of them watched the particles fill the air until the panther yāo’s body was no more. The air was filled with a silent grief and Zhao Wan'er opened her eyes.

Li Lun stood up, watching the last speck of coloured dust disappeared into the air before he turned away to head back home. 

“Li Lun,” Zhao Wan'er softly called but Zhuo Yixuan heard it. 

“My rut just ended,” Li Lun told her. “I'm going home to sleep. Don't disturb me.”

He left in a swirl of pagoda leaves, missing Zhuo Yixuan's look of realization.

That was Li Lun's second meeting with Zhuo Yixuan. 

~~~~~~

The third time Li Lun met Zhuo Yixuan when Li Lun was saddled to babysit both Wen Xiao and Ying Lei. Zhuo Yixuan happened to be around and he ended up helping Li Lun to babysit in The White Tower.

Li Lun found it slightly suspicious but he never commented. Zhuo Yixuan sat next to Wen Xiao, watching Li Lun rock Ying Lei to sleep. 

“Of all days, both Ying Zhao and Zhao Wan'er chose to make me babysit a bunch of children,” Li Lun grumbled, pacing the floor, rocking a fussy Ying Lei. 

“I'm not a child,” Wen Xiao grumbled, falling into the familiar routine of arguing with Li Lun. “Stupid tree.” 

“Pesky human,” Li Lun hissed but turned to shush Ying Lei when a whimper was heard. “You're very fussy today. What's wrong?” 

Ying Lei whined, wiggling in Li Lun's hold. The pagoda tree yāo tried nearly everything to put Ying Lei to sleep but he was lost to what the half yāo half god child wanted. He briefly thought of Zhu Yan who would knew what to do. 

Zhuo Yixuan chuckled, slowly standing up and setting Yún Guāng Sword to rest against the table edge. He stepped down and stopped in front of Li Lun. He raised his arms and waited.

Li Lun shifted his grip, narrowing his eyes at Zhuo Yixuan and Wen Xiao watched with a bated breath. 

The two alphas stared at one another until Ying Lei let out a loud wail, startling both of them. Li Lun tried to hush him but it seemed to make it worse. The alpha grew frazzled by the minute.

Zhuo Yixuan made a grabbing gesture with a quiet patience. “May I?” He asked.

Li Lun contemplated for a longer time, keeping a tight grip on Ying Lei's wiggling body.

Wen Xiao rolled her eyes. “Just hand the baby to him,” she argued and Li Lun shot her a hard glare before relenting.

He carefully handed Ying Lei to Zhuo Yixuan. The fussy baby's cry dwindled as Zhuo Yixuan slowly and carefully rocked Ying Lei. He rubbed Ying Lei's back and hummed a soft children's lullaby.

Ying Lei sniffled, resting his head on Zhuo Yixuan's shoulder. The young alpha human continued to hum, rubbing soothing circles on Ying Lei’s back until they heard a loud burp coming from the baby. 

Soft coos were heard and Zhuo Yixuan glanced over to peer at Ying Lei’s head. Wen Xiao grinned brightly and Li Lun huffed.

Ying Lei continued to coo, grabbing fistfuls of Zhuo Yixuan's hair. He tugged on the strands, gurgling with happiness. He seemed to amused himself with Zhuo Yixuan's hair.

Zhuo Yixuan tried to pass Ying Lei back to Li Lun. 

“You hold him,” Li Lun said, choosing to sit down beside Wen Xiao. “He likes you so you can keep holding him.”

Wen Xiao poked Li Lun’s arm but her eyes were trained on Zhuo Yixuan's quiet and gentle actions in handling Ying Lei.

“How did you know he needed to burp?” She asked, tilting her head and continued to poke Li Lun. 

Zhuo Yixuan chuckled, bouncing Ying Lei a few times and the baby giggled. “My brother is the same. He was a fussy baby too.” 

“You have a brother? Where is he? Is he with you now?” 

Zhuo Yixuan smiled softly at her before heading over to a free seat. He sat down with an expert hold on Ying Lei.

“No, he's at home. He's still young and can't follow me everywhere," Zhuo Yixuan said, shifting to rock Ying Lei.

Li Lun scoffed but his gaze was trained on Ying Lei, ready to snatch the baby if he needed too. Zhuo Yixuan's gaze turned towards Li Lun and the pagoda tree yāo could see the burning question in them.

Ying Lei sneezed loudly, breaking everyone's staring. He sniffled once until he spotted Li Lun. Ying Lei reached for Li Lun instead, making grabby hands motion. 

“How old is he?” Zhuo Yixuan asked, passing Ying Lei to Li Lun. 

“At least a few hundred years old,” Li Lun answered, shifting Ying Lei so he faces Wen Xiao. “He'll grow up fast when he hits a certain age.” 

Ying Lei cooed, playing with Wen Xiao's wiggling fingers. Li Lun heard Zhuo Yixuan choke on air.

“Ho—”

“Dà Huāng time and the mortal realm are different.” Li Lun glanced at Zhuo Yixuan. “Time doesn't matter to us.” 

“But it's okay,” Wen Xiao answered, taking Ying Lei from Li Lun and carefully held the baby. She let Ying Lei stand on her thighs. “Mortals aren't affected by time in Dà Huāng. But Ying Lei dìdi is different, aren't you?” She said, rubbing the tip of her nose with Ying Lei’s and the baby squealed in delight. 

“Dìdi?” Li Lun scoffed. “He should be calling you mèimei. He's older than you.” 

“But he's a baby!” Wen Xiao whined.

“For now. He'll hit a growth spurt soon and Ying Zhao is going to have his hands full from this little yāo.” 

Zhuo Yixuan chuckled quietly. “They do tend to grow fast,” he said, reminiscing Zhuo Yichen's growth spurt. 

Wen Xiao grinned. “Young master, I still don't know your name. I'm Wen Xiao and this is—” Li Lun clicked his tongue and halted her words. She glared at him for being impolite. 

“Zhuo Yixuan.” Zhuo Yixuan answered, ignoring Li Lun's rudeness and glanced at the pagoda tree yāo with a smile. “You remind me of someone.” 

Li Lun narrowed his eyes but didn't say another word. Ying Lei started to rub his eyes sleepily. Li Lun took him from Wen Xiao's arms to put him down for a nap. 

“Don't do anything stupid, pesky human,” Li Lun said, heading to the spare bedrooms. “And don't go anywhere before I cage the both of you and dangle from the cliff,” he threatened, disappearing into the room. 

“Maybe I should ask master to turn you into a twig and stick you into a pot!” Wen Xiao threatened back and she yelped when the floor mat underneath her seat was yanked away by one of Li Lun’s vines. “Li Lun, you stupid tree!” 

Zhuo Yixuan carefully hid his smile but helped Wen Xiao up. Her grumbling made him chuckle quietly.

“Sorry about his rudeness. He’s like that to everyone. Prickly tree,” Wen Xiao grumbled. 

“He’s just worried about you,” Zhuo Yixuan helpfully said. “I would be the same if my brother was with a stranger.” 

“But you aren’t a stranger. You saved me back at the market and I haven’t thanked you yet. Thank you, dàgē."

“It’s alright. It’s better that you were safe and Li Lun was there, wasn’t he?” Zhuo Yixuan asked and Wen Xiao nodded. “So his name is Li Lun…” he mumbled.

“Do you know him?" Wen Xiao questioned, pouring them some tea. "You look like you know him.” 

Zhuo Yixuan shook his head. “A friend of mine knows him. I’ve only heard of his name in passing,” he lied but Wen Xiao narrowed her eyes in the same way Li Lun does.

Zhuo Yixuan didn’t comment on the mannerism, waiting for Li Lun to return. He sipped on his tea and Wen Xiao badgered him with more questions.

~~~~~~

Li Lun stopped in his tracks as he walked through the path in Dà Huāng. He summoned a ball of yāo energy and threw it to the back. He heard the sound of a sword blocking the attack followed by a low hum of energy. He turned around, standing tall and glared at Zhuo Yixuan smiling at Li Lun. 

“Why are you following me?” Li Lun hissed with a narrowed gaze.

“Li Lun, was it?” Zhuo Yixuan didn’t flinch when Li Lun suddenly appeared in front of him.

Li Lun wrapped his hand around Zhuo Yixuan’s throat and squeezed it tightly. The alpha human glanced at him with a smile on his face.

“I’ve heard of you,” Li Lun growled. “You’ve been asking about me. I am very tempted to break your neck right here. No one will ever find your dead body in Dà Huāng. They will have to scour every mountain, lake and land to find you,” Li Lun threatened. 

Zhuo Yixuan didn’t make a sound. He glanced at Li Lun’s angry gaze. He knew he was balancing on a fine line when he was asking about Li Lun’s whereabouts but he didn’t expect the pagoda tree yāo would be the Great Yāo.

He has to thread this very carefully. 

“Zhu Yan is alive,” Zhuo Yixuan said, holding back a wince when Li Lun squeezed his throat tightly. 

“How dare you speak his name!?” Li Lun roared, flinging Zhuo Yixuan to the side and his eyes blazing with pure anger. “Zhu Yan is dead. You people fucking killed him and tore him away from me!”  

Zhuo Yixuan managed to stop himself from falling. He breathed hard through his nose. The scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth had taken a more sulphuric scent. It made Zhuo Yixuan’s nose hurt. An angry yāo is not to be played with and Zhuo Yixuan is playing with fire now. 

“Zhu Yan…” Zhuo Yixuan tried again but he scrambled to free his throat when Li Lun grabbed his throat again, squeezing it tightly. “Is…alive…” he choked in between his choked breath. 

“No!” Li Lun yelled. “He’s dead! What do you know of a dead bond!? What do you know of having your mate taken away from you! And this is all your fucking fault. If you hadn’t killed our child! If you hadn’t–” Li Lun threw accusations, blending the dead demon hunter together with Zhuo Yixuan.

He was losing himself to the hatred that had been brewing in his heart. “If none of you entered Dà Huāng and killed our child, Zhu Yan wouldn’t be ripped away from me!” 

Sweet peaches and apple blossoms bloomed in the air, faint as it is, made Li Lun pause. He could smell the sweet scent of his omega. He blinked the angry haze from his eyes.

Zhu Yan’s scent brought him back to clarity and he looked around. He saw no one but them. Li Lun released Zhuo Yixuan’s throat, stepping away from him. The human alpha gasped hard for air, coughing harshly and rubbed his bruised throat.

“Zhu Yan is alive,” Zhuo Yixuan croaked.

Li Lun closed his eyes, feeling the imaginative Zhu Yan appear next to them.

“Liar,” Li Lun muttered, suddenly feeling drained and opened his eyes to see Zhu Yan crouching in front of Zhuo Yixuan. “Don’t ever ask about me or find me. My mate is dead and that’s the end of it.”

He walked away, leaving Zhuo Yixuan behind and hoped to never see the human again. Zhu Yan trotted after Li Lun with a wistful smile. 

“Why won’t you believe him?” Imaginative Zhu Yan asked, looking at Zhuo Yixuan from over his shoulder. “He probably speaks the truth.” 

“You are dead,” Li Lun hissed. “All humans lie and my bond is dead. What truth is there when I can’t feel you.” 

“Then aren’t you living a lie too? You’re talking to someone who is dead but yet…” 

“I’m going mad then.” Imaginative Zhu Yan chuckled. “Losing you was hard with the bond breaking and the pain that came with it. I’ve lost parts of myself and you’re just a figure of my own desperate need to keep you alive.”

“In memory? Oh, my sweet Li Lun.” Li Lun felt Zhu Yan’s arms wrapped around him in a hug. 

The alpha felt the soft nuzzle and the scent he longed to scent was gone. Li Lun returned home, closing the doors to his entrance with a flick of his hand.

He laid in the nest he built up in the branches of his tree. He curled into a ball, holding his shoulders and felt Zhu Yan’s head rest on his shoulder. Zhu Yan hummed a children’s lullaby, lulling Li Lun to sleep. 

~~~~~~

Li Lun thinks Zhuo Yixuan is a strange human with a stubborn streak. He kept returning to Dà Huāng, waiting for Li Lun at the White Tower and would return home before repeating again.

Li Lun felt his hackles raised when Zhuo Yixuan quietly followed Wen Xiao to Li Lun’s home the first time. Li Lun almost threw Zhuo Yixuan into the rushing Yāo waters below.

Wen Xiao stopped him and he caged the two of them in a ball of roots, dangling them from the cliff. 

Zhao Wan’er had to rescue the two of them when Wen Xiao sent a bird messenger. Li Lun refused to come down from his nest, ignoring Zhao Wan'er's soft voice.

Zhuo Yixuan could have freed himself but he didn’t, choosing to sit in the caged roots. He meditated while Wen Xiao threw insults at Li Lun. The teenager pouted and stomped her feet when they were free and she glared at Li Lun's back. 

Li Lun refused to appear for a few days. Zhao Wan'er grew worried and sent Wen Xiao to coax him. Coaxing wouldn't work when it was Wen Xiao.

“Stop sulking!” Wen Xiao yelled at Li Lun the next time she came with Zhuo Yixuan. “Zhuo gē did nothing to you. Why are you behaving like this!?”

Wen Xiao’s mouth was sealed and she screamed through the spell. She angrily pointed at Li Lun who hid in the higher parts of his tree branches.

“Leave,” Li Lun shot back, flinging them out of his home but he cushioned their fall with soft mosses blooming before the entrance was shut. 

“Li Lun, you stupid tree!” 

Zhuo Yixuan didn’t say a word, escorting Wen Xiao home. He came again without Wen Xiao and managed to catch Li Lun who ventured out of his home.

The pagoda tree yāo threw roots and vines at Zhuo Yixuan. The two fought—one sided—and Zhuo Yixuan blocked the attacks with Yún Guāng Sword expertly. Li Lun wrapped a root around Zhuo Yixuan's ankle and pulled him down. 

Li Lun descended onto him, holding his neck with a claw grip and snarled at Zhuo Yixuan.

“Why the fuck do you keep returning? Zhu Yan is dead and I don't need you to tell me he's alive!”

Zhuo Yixuan didn't say anything, slowly pulling something out from his sleeve pocket with a calm look. Li Lun squeezed his neck in warning. He glanced at the white handkerchief.

The scent of peaches and apple blossoms was faint but there on the cloth. It was the scent that Li Lun had longed to smell and bury his nose into Zhu Yan’s soft hair.  

It made his heart ache for his mate. Li Lun stared at the handkerchief like it was a mesmerising stone. When he didn't squeeze Zhuo Yixuan's throat, the human alpha slowly unwrapped the cloth and showed Li Lun the contents. 

A single lock of silver hair laid on the white handkerchief. The very same silver hair that Zhu Yan wore as his human form.

Li Lun could picture his image. Long wavy silver hair, decorated with golden hair beads and little soft white pompoms. Almond shaped eyes that would light up when Li Lun followed him and the sweet scent of peaches and apple blossoms brought the feeling of home. 

Li Lun didn't realize tears were falling from his eyes. He slowly pulled his hand away, hesitating in taking the handkerchief. The human alpha handed the handkerchief quietly and Li Lun held the cloth like it was the most precious thing. 

Zhuo Yixuan sat up just as Li Lun sat on his knees, staring at the silver lock.

“He really is alive,” Zhuo Yixuan croaked and Li Lun didn't move. “I'm sorry for what had happened to you and him.” 

Li Lun blinked his eyes furiously, trying to stop the tears. “Apologies won't fix what happened,” Li Lun said.

“I know it won't…” 

A sudden urge to disrupt Zhuo Yixuan bloomed in Li Lun's chest. “How sure is this silver lock of hair is Zhu Yan's and not someone's else? Or that you sprayed peaches and apple blossom oil on the lock to trick me?” Li Lun accused the human alpha.

Li Lun wouldn't want to be deceived but he ached to touch the hair. He wanted to know that this was really his mate's hair and Zhuo Yixuan wasn't lying. 

“I…can't exactly bring him here…” Zhuo Yixuan answered and Li Lun scoffed, curling his hand over the lock of hair. “He calls your name when he's alone.” Li Lun glanced at Zhuo Yixuan. “He calls you ‘my alpha' and about a pup called ‘Little Blossom.”

Li Lun's sudden intake of breath made Zhuo Yixuan gaze at him. No one calls their pup little blossom except for Zhu Yan. Their daughter, their

“Xiao Hua.” Li Lun whispered, believing the truth. “He's…alive?” Li Lun asked with a small hint of hope. 

Zhuo Yixuan nodded. “He is. He's living in my family's home.” 

Li Lun narrowed his eyes. “Your family would treat him terribly for what we are.”

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes took on a sad look and he looked away. 

“He has his own room,” Zhuo Yixuan said. “But he's binded to the room. He can't leave it.” 

“In other words, a fucking prison.” Li Lun growled, grabbing the lapels of Zhuo Yixuan's front robes and pulled him forward. He took extra care not to crush Zhu Yan's hair. “Your family caged him and he's trapped there.”

“And I want to free him,” Zhuo Yixuan said, earning a laugh from Li Lun. 

“Free him? How? You can't do a fucking thing, whelp. He's imprisoned for years and I don't trust you to just free him either.” 

“Then help me free him,” Zhuo Yixuan asked with fire burning in his eyes. The scent of sandalwood and cedarwood took a sharper scent and Li Lun grew curious. “I can't do it alone and he thinks you're dead.” 

“Who wouldn't?” Li Lun growled. “Our bond is severed and dead. We both think each of us is dead.” 

“But you're not,” Zhuo Yixuan pointed out. “You're both not dead and I need your help to convince him that you're alive.” 

“There isn't any way,” Li Lun shoved Zhuo Yixuan. “Don't try. Once Zhu Yan believes something, it'll be hard to convince him.”

He turned away, holding the lock of hair in his hand and left Zhuo Yixuan alone. He hoped it was the last time he would see the human alpha.

Zhuo Yixuan didn't give up either. He kept returning back to Huaijing Valley, never stepping foot into Li Lun's home and waited outside.

Li Lun grew annoyed at first but slowly over the weeks that turned into months, his annoyance tapered to curiosity.

Li Lun was leaning against the Dianmu Divine Tree, feeling the old tree pulse with power. He watched Zhuo Yixuan practice his sword stance at the open courtyard of the White Tower, delighting Wen Xiao with the display. 

“Your footing is wrong. The sword won't respond to you with that kind of sloppy moves,” Li Lun said, startling both humans. 

Wen Xiao glared at Li Lun. “What would you know?” She huffed. “Do you even know the moves?" She grinned, thinking she won and Li Lun rolled his eyes. 

“Your right foot is slightly off. The direct flow of your stance isn't right. Your arms aren't steady enough. Is this how they teach you how to wield the sword? No wonder your family is in decline,” Li Lun pointed out with a bite and Zhuo Yixuan sighed loudly, knowing the partial truth. 

“The sword doesn't respond to me,” Zhuo Yixuan said, lifting Yún Guāng Sword up, staring at his own reflection. 

“Bing Yi’s sword is temperamental. You can't force the sword to obey you. It will choose who the wielder is and obviously it isn't you.” 

“Don't be mean,” Wen Xiao said, looking at Zhuo Yixuan's polite smile. “Be more polite.” 

“I'm not being mean. It's the truth. Yún Guāng Sword is a sword that will deem the wielder worthy to be wielded. It's a known fact passed down for generations, isn't it? And not one of them was chosen.” 

“It is the truth,” Zhuo Yixuan said, stopping Wen Xiao from arguing. He twirled the sword in his hand and let the tip point upwards to the sky. “It hasn't chosen anyone and yet…” his answer left them hanging and he smiled at them. “It officially didn't choose me.” 

Li Lun gazed at Zhuo Yixuan with an unreadable look. He stepped forward, grabbing Zhuo Yixuan's wrist and lightly kicked his feet to get him into position. Zhuo Yixuan followed, knowing better than to fight Li Lun. 

“Just follow my lead. Let the energy flow through you through your meridians. You'll know from the feeling,” Li Lun said, guiding Zhuo Yixuan through certain steps. 

They danced to the stances. It flowed like water flowing through cracks and land. Zhuo Yixuan felt Yún Guāng's energy slowly flow through him.

Li Lun's steps were light and precise, making sure Zhuo Yixuan felt it. Zhuo Yixuan felt his body being stretched further than he ever had. The flow in his meridians were like icy water following the river’s path. 

Cold and constricting but it felt right for him.

Zhuo Yixuan allowed Li Lun's hold to correct his stance, lifting the sword up and thrusting forward. An icy burn flowed through his veins and Zhuo Yixuan’s eyes glowed briefly with an icy blue glow. His scent of sandalwood and cedarwood took an icy scent, sharp like a winter night. 

Zhuo Yixuan blinked his eyes and the glow disappeared. He breathed hard, glancing over his shoulder to find Li Lun looking at him with an unreadable look.

Their eyes met and the air between them grew with something else. They only broke apart when Wen Xiao gasped out loud. They looked at her with different degrees of expressions.

“Look, my tea has turned into ice! Zhuo gē, did the sword choose you?” She cried out excitedly and Zhuo Yixuan looked at Yún Guāng Sword. 

He felt empty and the cold feeling from before disappeared. “No, it didn't.” Zhuo Yixuan slowly put the sword away and Li Lun stepped away from him. 

Li Lun left without another word and Zhuo Yixuan watched him leave. They both knew something had changed between them in that moment.

~~~~~~

Li Lun twirled a stick between his fingers. He waited for Zhuo Yixuan to arrive at the designated place Li Lun had chosen. An area in Dà Huāng that was mostly quiet and remote.

He thought back over the three years since Li Lun taught Zhuo Yixuan the sword technique for Yún Guāng. Something had changed between them and it was like Li Lun's inner alpha wanted to know about Zhuo Yixuan.

Li Lun didn't think much, letting the human alpha enter his space and in return Li Lun entered Zhuo Yixuan's.

"Li Lun," Zhuo Yixuan called and Li Lun looked up, dropping the stick. "It really is remote."

Li Lun nodded, glancing over Zhuo Yixuan's shoulder to find Ao Yin standing far away. He nodded at her and she hesitated in leaving him. After a few moments, she left them alone and Li Lun took Zhuo Yixuan to continue teaching him Yún Guāng's techniques.

Overtime, their closeness grew. Each time Zhuo Yixuan visited, he would give Li Lun something that belonged to Zhu Yan.

A piece of cloth from Zhu Yan's clothes, drenched with his sweet scent. A hairpin that Zhu Yan no longer uses. Tea that Zhu Yan liked. Anything and everything Zhuo Yixuan brought to Li Lun.

It was amusing but deep in Li Lun's heart it healed a small part of himself that yearned for his mate. It wasn't until Zhuo Yixuan gifted Li Lun a lock of Zhu Yan's hair again.

Li Lun shoved Zhuo Yixuan up against the pagoda tree trunk in Huaijing Valley. Li Lun had allowed Zhuo Yixuan to enter his home and was immediately crowded up against the tree.

Zhuo Yixuan held his gaze with Li Lun who leaned close to him. The pagoda tree yāo trapped Zhuo Yixuan with his height and size.

Zhuo Yixuan isn't afraid of Li Lun and the pagoda tree yāo knew it too. Li Lun leaned closer until his nose was touching the tip of Zhuo Yixuan's ear.

“You smell like him,” Li Lun commented and Zhuo Yixuan knew who they were talking about. “Did you fuck him?” 

Zhuo Yixuan jolted on the spot. He wasn't expect the question and Li Lun pulled back. The pagoda tree yāo seemed to know from Zhuo Yixuan's expression.

A light blush coated Zhuo Yixuan's cheeks and Li Lun knew he hit the mark. The pagoda tree yāo cornered Zhuo Yixuan even further up his tree, leaning closer until he scented Zhuo Yixuan's scent gland. 

“You definitely fucked him,” Li Lun said, smelling peaches and apple blossoms mixed with sandalwood and cedarwood. “I can smell him on you. Was he good?” He whispered, moving to nip against Zhuo Yixuan's ear.

Zhuo Yixuan shifted on his spot, trying to turn his head away but Li Lun's fingers caught his chin, forcing him to gaze into Li Lun's eyes.

Willow shaped eyes stared at blossom shaped eyes and neither broke their staring. Li Lun found he enjoyed Zhuo Yixuan's scent mixed with Zhu Yan's. Something about it seemed almost right.

A blend that was unique to itself. He wanted to add his own scent to it. A blend of a forest and garden, sweet, intoxicating and harmonious with all three of them.

He could picture it. Zhu Yan's bright laughter and Zhuo Yixuan's soft smile and Li Lun smirk. All three of them in one place, living together.

A unity between Dà Huāng and the human realm.

“Maybe if it's with you…” Li Lun whispered so low and Zhuo Yixuan heard it.

Zhuo Yixuan's eyes widened and he searched Li Lun's face for any information. Li Lun covered Zhuo Yixuan's eyes with his hand, leaning further down until his lips hovered in front of Zhuo Yixuan's parted lips.

Li Lun needed to just lean forward and he would have kissed Zhuo Yixuan. But he pulled away, dropping his hand from Zhuo Yixuan's eyes.

“Show me your stances again,” Li Lun said, walking away to stand in a corner, and let Zhuo Yixuan gather his breath. 

“Mhm,” Zhuo Yixuan nodded, ignoring his slightly shaky limbs and pulled Yún Guāng Sword out. 

He showed Li Lun the stances, practising them until the pagoda tree yāo was satisfied. Li Lun watched Zhuo Yixuan leave and felt his heart beating fast in his chest. He almost felt like he was a young yāo again, learning to know what falling in love meant.

“You should love him,” imaginative Zhu Yan said, standing next to Li Lun. “Why didn't you kiss him?”

“Because I didn't want to,” Li Lun answered, turning to head to a corner to drink some water. “It wasn't right.” 

“For who? You or me?” 

“You're still my—”

“Mate? But I haven't been your mate for four thousand years. It's time to let me go, Li Lun.” 

“But that means giving up on you. If I can't see you anymore,” he said, feeling Zhu Yan leaned against his back and arms wrapped around his shoulders. 

“Lun’er, let me go. Let this version of me go and find your mate. The real Zhu Yan. You don't have to cling to the past like this.” 

“I can't…” 

“You're afraid that the Zhu Yan you find isn't the same. You're not the same Li Lun either. Time has changed us and we can't keep clinging to the past.” 

“Zhu Yan…” Li Lun closed his eyes and felt Zhu Yan pressed a kiss to his cheek. 

Faint and empty. The weight he felt on his back was gone with Zhu Yan's lingering words in his ear. When he turned around, he found no one but himself and the little things that belonged to Zhu Yan. 

Li Lun wanted to see Zhu Yan but the thought of fighting the Zhuo clan to meet with his mate felt too much. It would be a hassle and bring nothing but pain and grief again. He doesn't want to be imprisoned in his home for a long time again.

Li Lun sighed, finding himself sitting in the White Tower. He glared at the koi fishes swimming in the pond. Wen Xiao came over to sit with him and she leaned against his arm. 

“Are you okay?” She asked him and Li Lun shrugged, nearly dislodging her. “I won't tell master. Is it the duties or…your mate?” 

“You've been eavesdropping,” Li Lun pointed out and Wen Xiao shrugged. “You wouldn't understand.” 

“I'm not an alpha or an omega but I know you,” Wen Xiao gently nudged Li Lun's shoulder. “You get sulky when you're this deep in thinking.” Li Lun scoffed at the truth. “I think Zhuo gē would let you see your mate if you ask him.” 

“It's not easy,” Li Lun said. “From what he told me, my mate is imprisoned in his own room, never stepping out from it. I won't be able to sneak in either from the arrays or barriers surrounding the area. It's too risky."

“Then what about meeting at Mount Kunlun? It's a neutral territory and neither side can't argue about it.” 

“It's an idea but convincing your own mate that you're still alive is harder.” 

“Then what will you do?” 

Li Lun didn't answer her and she didn't ask any more questions. They sat silently together, arms pressing against each other.

Li Lun continued to watch the koi fishes swim lazily around. He sighed again through his nose and Wen Xiao knew better than to ask again. She laid her head on his shoulder and they sat in a quiet silence only they understood.

~~~~~~

Human lives, Li Lun thought, were fickle and weak. They resembled like candle flames, easily blown out and it was something he never knew he would experience.

He has experienced love, happiness, grief, vengeance, longing, hatred, friendship and the first bloom of love again until it was ripped away from him once more. 

Two years have passed and Li Lun’s crush on Zhuo Yixuan has grown until he couldn’t stop it from growing. Zhuo Yixuan wasn't helping either, letting Li Lun get as close as he could and indulging the pagoda tree yāo . 

Small touches that Zhuo Yixuan could steal like a finger hooking with Li Lun's or standing slightly closer until Li Lun's scent rubbed on Zhuo Yixuan's clothes.

The rough kisses Li Lun gave Zhuo Yixuan were intoxicating when the alpha yāo finally caved into his feelings. Zhuo Yixuan gasped against Li Lun’s bruising kiss, feeling a need to tangled his own fingers in Li Lun's soft long black hair. 

They growled at each other, wanting to dominate one another but they never fought. They never ventured further besides kisses that Li Lun could steal. It carries on fine until one day Zhuo Yixuan’s scent smelt wrong. 

The human alpha smelt of sadness and grief, the kind that he had lost something important. Li Lun understood that fried perfectly. Sandalwood and cedarwood smelt burnt and dry, like it was set on fire and burnt to brittle. 

“What happened?” Li Lun asked, sitting beside Zhuo Yixuan when the human alpha stumbled into his home like a drunken person. 

Zhuo Yixuan never cried in front of Li Lun before, always standing strong. The first slide of tears was an indicator that something was truly wrong. 

“He…They…fuck,” Zhuo Yixuan cursed and Li Lun raised an eyebrow, finding it surprising at the curse. “Zhu Yan…he’s pregnant…and…"

Li Lun frowned. “And?” He felt he knew where this was going.

Zhuo Yixuan buried his face into his hands and leaned forward. “The baby didn’t survive…” he said. “It didn’t…he's so angry…I don’t know…”

Broken sentences. A broken scent. A grief that was thick until Li Lun could only smell was salt. Losing a pup was never easy and it was something Li Lun knew very well.

The loss and pain of finding your child’s dead body but Li Lun thinks the pup Zhu Yan carried would have a proper burial unlike their daughter. 

“It’s never easy,” Li Lun said, looking up at the pagoda tree and all of the flowers blooming. “The pain doesn’t go away either.” 

“I…didn’t expect him…Li Lun, his scent is all wrong and it hurts.” 

“It will always hurt but Zhu Yan is hurting more than us. Unlike you and I, Zhu Yan had to carry the pup and his grief is thicker than ours. He needs time.” Time that Li Lun knew would slowly destroy Zhu Yan. “But he can’t be alone either.” 

“Is…my words would mean nothing to him right now. If it’s something from you, maybe, it can help,” Zhuo Yixuan said, pulling his hands away to look at Li Lun. “Something that would remind him of you.” 

Li Lun’s eyes glazed over in thought and he slowly stood up. “Remind him of me, huh?” He mumbled, allowing wisps of his yāo energy to form in his palm until a stalk of pagoda flowers rested on it. 

He rubbed his fingers against his scent gland on his wrist, letting his scent thicken and rubbed the flowers against it. He scent-marked the flowers before handing them to Zhuo Yixuan. 

“This is as much as I can do for him,” Li Lun said. “Whether it helps him or not, it’s entirely up to him.” 

Zhuo Yixuan took the stalk of flowers, gently holding it and nodded. “Thank you,” he said and Li Lun nodded. “I better return soon.” 

Zhuo Yixuan stood up. He felt his lips captured in a hard kiss. Li Lun kissed him, tangling his fingers in Zhuo Yixuan’s ponytail before pulling away. 

“One for the journey,” Li Lun told him. “Until I see you again.” 

Zhuo Yixuan smiled softly at him. “When I figure out how to free Zhu Yan, maybe…” 

Li Lun sighed. “Maybe is just wishful thinking but if we are thinking the same, the thought of being with you and him doesn't sound so bad.” 

Zhuo Yixuan smiled, nodding once more before leaving Li Lun. Li Lun stayed in his home for the day, letting the wishful thinking grow in his mind.

Over the weeks when the pagoda flowers would wilt and die, Li Lun would give Zhuo Yixuan a new stalk. It became a weird habit for them. It was an indirect way of letting the two mates be close to each other until the night of the blood moon happened. 

Zhao Wan’er received news of a fight happening at the bridge, just before the portal to allow yāos into Dà Huāng when Li Lun was at the White Tower.

"Master?" Wen Xiao softly called and Li Lun looked up at the red sky.

"Stay here," he warned them and left in a swirl of pagoda leaves to head to Mount Kunlun.

Li Lun always hated the blood moon. He remembered seeing his beloved mate snarl and grin evilly at everything. How the malicious energy would fill his mate’s body and Zhu Yan was nothing but a vessel for malicious energy, lost to the hatred of everything.

Li Lun didn’t expect to see his mate again or what’s left of him. The blood moon always tore Zhu Yan’s sanity and it would take weeks for Li Lun to slowly piece him back together.

Tonight was different. 

Tonight was the first time Li Lun learnt how fragile human lives were. 

He heard snow crunch underneath the sole of his shoes when he landed at the gates of Mount Kunlun. He ran as fast as he could when the scent of blood was growing thick in the air. He heard the heart wrenching scream tearing loudly in the cold air. 

He knew that scream and he ran faster. The sight that greeted him was different yet it wasn't. It’s been more than four thousand years since Li Lun last saw him. 

Four thousand years since he scented Zhu Yan but the scent before him was very wrong. 

And the scene before him was also very wrong. 

Li Lun felt his breath caught in his throat. His heart shattered at the sight of Zhu Yan cradling Zhuo Yixuan's limp body in his arms. Li Lun watched from his spot at the edge of the bridge.

Zhu Yan desperately shook Zhuo Yixuan, screaming at him to wake but it all fell on deaf ears. Li Lun saw the change in Zhu Yan's eyes, from desperate pleas to a manic laughter. 

Zhu Yan laughed hysterically, placing Zhuo Yixuan down and reached for Yún Guāng Sword. The sword glowed brightly, thrumming with power at the sense of a yāo. Zhu Yan gripped the sword’s hilt. It burned his palm but the white ape yāo didn't care. 

Li Lun's eyes widened and the sense of dread filled him. Zhu Yan's eyes were glazed and unseeing like grief overridden every rationality in Zhu Yan's mind.

The way the omega yāo stood up on shaky legs, holding the most powerful sword in his hand and it looked wrong. The blade sang loudly in warning and Zhu Yan placed the sharp blade against his neck.

He smiled to himself, bracing himself and he swung the sword. 

Li Lun did what he knew would stop Zhu Yan from descending further.

“STOP.”

The alpha command rippled through Zhu Yan. It sank in easily and his movements stopped. Li Lun breathed hard and Zhu Yan waited for his next alpha command like the good omega he is. 

“Drop.” 

The sword fell with a clatter and Zhu Yan fell to his knees. Snow slowly melted around Zhu Yan, soaking his robes. His eyes were blank and glazed over from the command.

Li Lun can't give another harsh command or he'll send Zhu Yan into an omega drop. It'll be disastrous for the both of them if Zhu Yan does drop.

Li Lun ran towards him, kicking Yún Guāng Sword away. He dropped in front of Zhu Yan and his stuttering breath was loud in his ears.

Zhu Yan continued to stare blankly at him, hardly recognizing his alpha at all. Li Lun pulled Zhu Yan into his arms. The omega followed, resting on Li Lun’s body and his alpha hugged him tightly. 

The scent of peaches and apple blossoms were faint but the scent of blood was thicker along with salty tears. Li Lun placed a hand on the back of Zhu Yan's head, pressing Zhu Yan's face into Li Lun's shoulder.

“Sleep.” Li Lun commanded.

He felt Zhu Yan sagged into his arms and Li Lun sat down in the snow. Li Lun finally had Zhu Yan in his hold even when the scenario was wrong. He glanced at Zhuo Yixuan and Li Lun felt his heart tore in half again.

Zhuo Yixuan’s eyes stared lifelessly up at the grey skies. Dead and clouded. It no longer held the life or the gentleness in them. Li Lun was unable to stand the sight and gently closed Zhuo Yixuan's eyes.

Li Lun closed his own eyes. He doesn't know how long he sat there. He only felt the heavy weight of Zhu Yan's body with his slow breathing. It grounded Li Lun in a way strange comforting way.

He heard snow crunching somewhere behind and a loud gasp followed next.

Li Lun opened his eyes and looked up to find Zhao Wan’er looking at the massacre of dead bodies around them. Her eyes were filled with horror until she met Li Lun's stare.

Ying Zhao hurriedly came over before he stood in shock. He looked at each body with a pitiful gaze until his gaze landed on Zhuo Yixuan's body and the silent Yún Guāng Sword. 

Li Lun tightened his grip on Zhu Yan's shoulders. “Don't,” he warned them. 

“Li Lun,” Zhao Wan'er breathed, taking a step forward only to be held back by Ying Zhao when Li Lun snarled at them. 

“Don't fucking come near us,” Li Lun growled out. “You're going to take him away from me again.”

“Child,” Ying Zhao called softly and Li Lun turned his angry gaze at the old mountain god. “Zhu Yan shouldn't be here.” 

“Then I'll take him back with me,” Li Lun said, shifting back and Zhu Yan's nose was pressed against Li Lun's old mating mark. “Don't take him away from me.” 

Zhao Wan'er carefully came forward until she knelt in front of Li Lun. The distance between them was a few steps but she gave him some space to breathe. Her eyes glanced at Zhu Yan, seeing the bruised lining underneath his eye and tears staining his face.

The sight made her heart clenched at his pitiful look. 

A low glow of gold caught her attention and she looked down at Zhu Yan's arms. Gold bracelets rested on his wrists. Those bracelets belonged to the Zhuo clan. She knew because it shimmered with inscriptions and a power that was familiar with Yún Guāng Sword.

Inscriptions crawled up Zhu Yan's arms. It was a sign that he was away from where he was supposed to be.

Zhao Wan'er's shoulder sagged at the indication. 

Zhu Yan can never be free. 

“Li Lun,” she said softly and Li Lun grunted at her. She looked at him with a gaze that seemed old and forgiving. “He can't stay. If you bring him to Huaijing Valley, the bindings on him will kill him.” 

Li Lun's eyes darted down to Zhu Yan's arms and he nearly cried in anger. The binds shimmered and glowed and it continued to swirl around Zhu Yan's arms.

Li Lun held onto Zhu Yan like a stubborn child. He couldn't bear to be separated from his mate again.

Zhao Wan'er and Ying Zhao understood his pain and longing.  

They have been separated for so long and this wasn’t the kind of reunion anyone wanted. 

“Then free him,” Li Lun argued. “Free him from this!”

Zhao Wan’er shook her head. “This is something I can’t undo. These bindings are older than us, even older than the Baize flute and only a Zhuo can undo it.” 

Li Lun’s eyes darted to Zhuo Yixuan and he felt his heart plummeting even more. He looked down at Zhu Yan. The despair he felt fell on him. He’ll never get his mate back and Li Lun felt hopeless again. 

“Li Lun,” Ying Zhao muttered, placing a kind hand on Li Lun’s shoulder. “We have to take him back.” 

Li Lun knew it was the right thing to do but he refused. He hugged his mate tightly, letting himself soak Zhu Yan's warmth. He would have continued to hold Zhu Yan until Li Lun's shoulders suddenly dropped.

He slipped an arm underneath Zhu Yan’s knees and lifted him up in a bridal carry. Zhao Wan’er stood up, warily watching him but she trusted him.

Li Lun held Zhu Yan with a tight grip until his knuckles hurt. Zhu Yan's head rested on the crook between his neck and shoulder.

“Then I’ll go and send him back,” Li Lun said. “I’m not letting you rip him away from me and he’s under my alpha command right now. Only I can release him from it.” 

Ying Zhao sighed and nodded at Zhao Wan’er. “Permission then?” Zhao Wan’er nodded. “We’ll follow you to the Zhuo mansion.” 

Li Lun could have done it himself but he knew he would flee with Zhu Yan in his arms. He nodded at them. It was the only way to keep Zhu Yan alive.

When they arrived in Tiandu at night, making their way to the Zhuo mansion with the moonlight as their guiding light. The Zhuo mansion was in an uproar about the news.

Li Lun didn’t like the feeling of chaos. He pressed Zhu Yan closer to his body, hoping to shield the omega away.

Three people ran up to them as they waited at the entrance. An older man with eyes that reminded Li Lun of Wen Xiao. Kindness and understanding was heavily seen in those brown eyes.

“I’m Fan Ying,” the man introduced himself and Li Lun felt he had heard that name before. 

Fan Ying’s eyes darted over to Zhu Yan’s unconscious form and he sucked in a breath. “He’s not supposed to be out here,” he whispered so lowly and Li Lun heard the whisper. 

Li Lun's eyes flashed with warning. He doesn’t like it that he's going to hand Zhu Yan over. He wanted to return to Dà Huāng immediately with Zhu Yan. But he stayed.

Fan Ying hesitated and turned to one of the people next to him. He whispered furiously about something and the man quickly took off.

Li Lun tightened his grip on Zhu Yan. His scent spiked with protectiveness, making Ying Zhao grunt at him in warning. Li Lun's eyes narrowed at Fan Ying.

“Is he…” Fan Ying asked, eyeing Zhu Yan and Zhao Wan’er shook her head.

“He’s still alive but unconscious right now. We’re returning him as the treaty is still being upheld,” Zhao Wan’er said and Fan Ying seemed to sigh in relief. “He’s under a heavy command currently and only his alpha can release him from the command.” 

Fan Ying frowned at that moment. “His alpha…Young Master Zhuo never took him as his–” he muttered when his eyes widened at the sudden realization. His eyes darted up at Li Lun. “His alpha…” 

“Li Lun,” Ying Zhao softly urged and Li Lun glared at Fan Ying. 

The pagoda tree yāo carefully set Zhu Yan onto his feet and held him tightly. He leaned down to whisper against Zhu Yan’s ear.

“Awake.” 

Zhu Yan’s eyes fluttered open but it still held the glaze look in them. He stood up straight and Li Lun slowly released his hold on Zhu Yan’s shoulders. The omega yāo swayed on the spot with unseeing eyes stared blankly at Li Lun.

Li Lun curled his fingers into a tight grip. “Head back to your room. Once there, the command will be released.” 

Zhu Yan nodded sluggishly. He started walking, heading into the Zhuo mansion like a puppet being pulled by its string.

Fan Ying watched him disappear around the hallway and one of the hunters quickly followed Zhu Yan until Li Lun couldn’t see or smell him anymore.

Fan Ying bowed to them and hurriedly returned with a quick thank you and goodbye.

Li Lun’s heart squeezed tightly when the doors closed in front of them. Zhao Wan’er placed a gentle hand on his shoulder but it was nothing of a comfort.

It would be the last time Li Lun ever saw Zhu Yan or so he thought. 

~~~~~~

Three years have passed and Li Lun researched on the gold bindings on Zhu Yan’s arms. He knew that they were ancient, older than the years he’s lived. He found nothing about the bindings or the inscriptions.

Wen Xiao tried to help him, but she was clueless about it. Her training as the next Baize Goddess went smoothly and Li Lun watched over her growth.  

Wen Xiao was sent to the Demon Hunting Bureau. It was to make a deeper connection with the Zhuo clan as every Baize Goddesses have done.

For the treaty as Zhao Wan’er told Li Lun but he disagreed to it, never voicing his thoughts. Wen Xiao would travel back and forth between the mortal realm and the White Tower. 

Fan Ying had adopted her as his daughter and Wen Xiao had needed a guardian during her stay in the mortal realm. It made sense as he’s directly involved with the Zhuo family.

Li Lun disliked the idea but it kept Wen Xiao out of trouble when he couldn’t be there for her. 

Three years have passed since the death of Zhuo Yixuan and Li Lun never knew he would miss the human alpha’s presence more than anything. He has lost both his mate and his friend.

Li Lun tended to the Dianmu Divine Tree when he smelt the scent of snow and fresh water from behind him.

Cold and fresh. An alpha.

It was like the first winter fall and Li Lun tensed immediately. He turned around, throwing a single sharp vine when a blue shield burst in front of him.

The familiar thrum of a sword he recognized thrummed with life. The once transparent crystal that laid dormant for its previous owner was pulsing with a bright blue glow.

“Oh?” Li Lun said, pulling his hand back and the blue shield dropped. “Yún Guāng Sword has chosen its wielder.”

He looked up, finding himself looking into a pair of phoenix shaped grey blue eyes glaring at him. The colour was the same as Zhuo Yixuan. Li Lun could make a clear guess of who this man is.

Yún Guāng Sword pulsed loudly and the young alpha twirled the sword in his hand. 

“How do you know about this sword?” The young man said, narrowing his eyes.

Li Lun scoffed. “I know the previous wielder couldn’t awaken it. It seems like you did and you must be a Zhuo then.” 

“You knew my brother?” 

“Zhuo Yixuan,” Li Lun said and watched as the young man flinched with a deep frown and tears shimmered in his eyes. “Was your brother. He was–” 

“Killed by Zhu Yan,” the young man hissed. 

“Then why are you here?” Li Lun held himself back from snapping at the young alpha. “What’s your point of being here?” 

“Wen Xiao told me I could find you for help,” the young man said and Li Lun raised an eyebrow. “There’s a tricky case I need help in solving.” 

“And why do you need my help? The pesky human is offering help when she shouldn’t.”

“She said you would say that too.” Li Lun thinks Wen Xiao is enjoying toying with him from this distance. “She said you'll help since it involves her too.” 

Li Lun sighed loudly. “What has she done now?” 

“A case that involves a yao that might potentially harm her. We need the help of a Great Yāo and you’re the only Great Yāo that can help us.”

“Potentially?" Li Lun frowned. "And what’s in it for me?” 

“The whereabouts of your mate.”

Li Lun’s eyes narrowed. “The whereabouts of my mate? What do you know of my mate?” He growled lowly and the young man held his gaze without flinching.

A brave pup, this one is. 

“I can tell you where your mate might be but that's if you help us.”

“And if I refuse?” 

“Wen Xiao said you won't refuse because it involves your mate's well being.” 

“You’re playing with fire, little Zhuo. You and Wen Xiao. What’s your name?”

“Why should I tell you my name, yāo?”

Li Lun scoffed but he grinned. He liked the cautious look in the boy’s eyes.

“Fortunately, Wen Xiao has a habit of telling me everything and I know about you, Xiao Zhuo Yichen," Li Lun said loudly.

Zhuo Yichen clicked his tongue and glared at Li Lun. “Do we have a deal or not? I can do this mission alone even without your help.”

“Stubborn like your brother. I’ll help you since that pesky human is involved or I’ll snap your neck if you annoy me."

“Wen Xiao said you would threaten me,” Zhuo Yichen mumbled. “Fine," he agreed.

Li Lun might hate this joint help but he’s intrigued to what this Zhuo Yichen would do. He eyed the Yún Guāng Sword and hoped to find the answer in freeing Zhu Yan from the binds.

Li Lun didn't expect he would end up being saddled with another pesky human and he could picture Wen Xiao’s winning grin. He sighed roughly.

Maybe being imprisoned for longer sounded better than this. 

Chapter Text

Zhuo Yichen remembered how his childhood was. It was lonely, isolated and different. He was only five when he learnt how mean children could be.

Other children won’t play with him, sometimes calling him names that he was a demon child. An offspring between a yāo and a human.

He scrunched his nose up at the bullying. 

It hurts.

He wanted to yell at them to stop bullying him but he could never voice it out. He ran to his brother for comfort, climbing into his lap and hugged him with fat tears rolling down his cheeks.

Zhuo Yixuan quietly hugged him in return. It did comfort him a little bit but he wanted his mother more than anything. He watched her grow sick each day and his father grew distressed over it. His older brother looked sad at their mother's condition before he was saddle with responsibilities.

Their mother used to have a lovely scent of clary sage and lavender that he loved before it grew sickly like dying flowers. Her scent changed with a thick overlay of herbal medicine and blood.

Zhuo Yichen disliked her new scent but he would peer through the ajar door, watching her coughed blood into her white handkerchief. Those days would leave her weak and exhausted on her bed. On days when she felt better and was able to sit outside, Zhuo Yichen would run up to her. He climbed up the steps to her room and sat beside her before laying his head in her lap. 

“What’s wrong, Chen’er?” she asked softly, stroking his hair when he buried his face into her stomach, gripping her clothes tightly. “Oh, my sweet pup," she chuckled weakly. "Did those children bully you again?” 

He nodded, clutching onto her. He could smell the faint traces of her former scent.

“What did they bully you about this time?” she asked. 

“That I was a demon child,” he mumbled, feeling her tensed. “Mama,” he said, finally lifting his face up from his spot. “Am I a demon child?” 

His mother’s expression broke. She cuddled him close to her chest.

“No, my pup. You are not a demon child.” She gripped him tightly.

“Then why do they keep calling me that?” 

“It’s because of what our family is.” Zhuo Yichen pulled away to peer up at her. “The surname Zhuo carries a lot of weight,” she explained. “You know your brother is learning to wield the Yún Guāng Sword, right? That sword is special and it can kill any yāos, making it a fearsome sword. That's how powerful it is.” 

“It can kill yāos?” 

Zhuo Yichen’s mother nodded, stroking his cheek. “Yes and our family has hunted yāos for generations. We have a promise with the Baize Goddess.” Zhuo Yichen rested his cheek on her chest, listening to her heart beat. “When you're older, you will wield that sword one day. You'll become the most powerful demon hunter in the world."

She tickled Zhuo Yichen’s sides, eliciting a cheerful giggle before she erupted into harsh coughing. 

“Mama!" Zhuo Yichen cried out worriedly. "Does it hurt, mama?” he asked when his mother’s servant quickly came to give her some water. 

“No, it doesn't hurt,” she lied and Zhuo Yichen shifted to sit next to her instead. “Do you want to hear a story?”

He nodded. She began her tale of brave men and goddess. He listens to her voice, letting it lull him to a quiet comfort. He gripped her robes, leaning into her side as she stroked his hair.

The first time Zhuo Yichen met Zhu Yan or as he was known as ‘The Bride’ by the people in his family, was the first yāo he’s ever met. It was on a winter day when Zhuo Yichen met Zhu Yan. He clung onto his brother’s hand and mother’s fingers.

Zhu Yan knelt in front of them, dressed prettily that barely kept him warm in this winter. Zhuo Yichen wondered if Zhu Yan felt cold. Zhuo Yichen shivered from a cold wind breezing in despite the thick cloak he wore.

He didn’t know Zhu Yan was a yāo and only half listened to his father’s words. But Zhu Yan’s presence seemed to draw him in. Something about Zhu Yan compelled him to take a closer look.

His mother’s hand tightened around his small hand, halting him from getting closer. Zhuo Yichen's nose twitched at his father's sharp scent. The older alpha man looked angry and Zhuo Yichen wondered why.

Zhu Yan continued to kneel, staying still as a statue until he slowly lifted his gaze up at them. Zhuo Yichen couldn’t see through the veil but he thinks Zhu Yan must be pretty. It's only what he could think for his five-year old mind.

When Zhu Yan was escorted away, his brother looked conflicted. Something that was rare to see on his face and Zhuo Yichen felt Zhuo Yixuan's hand tightened his grip. His mother erupted into a coughing fit and his father was immediately by her side.

Zhuo Yichen's curiosity on Zhu Yan continued to grow. He stared at the spot Zhu Yan was last seen until he was allowed to leave to play. The adults were going to have a meeting and Zhuo Yichen was too young to be a part of it.

His mother was brought back to her room. She was exhausted after her coughing fit, leaving her unable to look after Zhuo Yichen.

Everyone had left him to entertain his own self. He played games by himself with invisible friends. He pretended to chase them, eliciting his own giggles before he grew bored.

Playing a game by himself wasn't really very fun. He wandered over to the family's fish pond and tossed a small stone into it. The water rippled on the surface, breaking his reflection in warped waves. It chased the koi fishes away, leaving him alone again.

He shuffled on the spot, pulling tightly on his winter cloak. A few servants spotted him, bowing in greeting and addressed him as, "Second Young Master."

They hurried off, leaving him behind without a look back. He's one of the heirs as his father told him before. He's meant to be next in line but he didn’t like the title. It made him feel shy and distant.

He scrunched his nose up, sneezing once from a cold breeze. He gave the pond one last look before scurrying away. He ran around the hallways with his little cape fluttering behind him like a butterfly koi fishtail. He ran though the empty paths, sneaking past servants and giggled to himself when they didn't see him.

He continued his little game of hide and seek until he stumbled upon the one place he was forbidden to enter. 

The Frost Pavilion.

It was the only place he wasn’t allowed in. Whenever he was caught lingering near the path to Frost Pavilion, he was always ushered away. He was given a light scolding before being left alone again.

Today, he decided he wanted to see what was inside. He looked around the quiet hallways, seeing nobody around him before dashing towards the courtyard. He hid behind pillars, crouching low to stay hidden. He crawled underneath the tables that he could squeeze through, placed in corners where no one could find him.

The doors to the bedroom were open. He peeked inside to find a fully furnished room. Drapes of blue cloth hung from the ceiling and fluttered in the cold wind. A large garden was seen stretching around the bedroom and a little stream of water ran around it. Cold mountain winds blew in and Zhou Yichen shivered from the cold. He spotted a big bed with a lit brazier sitting next to the bed.

Someone is in here and Zhuo Yichen wanted to know who. He glanced over his shoulder to check. When no one came to chase him away, he stepped through the open doors.

He softly padded into the room, finding it different for some strange reason. He’s never been to this part of the room and it felt like time was frozen in here. He made his way deeper until he stopped at the edge of the bed. 

Someone laid on the bed. Silver hair draped over the pillow. It seemed to shimmer from the dim light, like snow on the first early mornings.

Zhuo Yichen has never seen anyone with silver hair before. It looked pretty.

The person was asleep, dressed lightly and Zhuo Yichen wondered if they were cold. He saw a blanket sitting at the edge and pulled on it. It didn't move. He tugged hard, losing his balance in the last moment. He scrambled to hold onto something and ended up gripping onto the bedsheets. 

The person’s eyes opened, turning his head to the side, spotting Zhuo Yichen. They stared at each other with different degrees of surprise.

Zhuo Yichen found them to be very pretty. Silver hair tumbled over their shoulder. Almond shaped brown eyes; wide and curious stared at the sight of him. The man—Zhuo Yichen figured—slowly sat up.

Zhuo Yichen carefully released his grip on the bed sheet too. They continued to stare at each other when the man tilted his head to one side. Gold beads swayed from the movement, earning a look of awe on Zhuo Yichen's little face. He felt the tip of his ears burn hot before he scampered off. 

He didn’t expect to find a pretty man in the room. He ran as fast as he could until he crashed into someone’s legs. He fell back. Arms flailing around before being caught by a pair of strong hands. He looked up. His father steadied him before raising an eyebrow. 

“Chen’er,” his father said with a light scolding tone but softened his gaze when Zhuo Yichen hugged his waist. “What’s wrong?” 

Zhuo Yichen wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell his father about his little discovery. He shook his head. He buried his nose into his father’s abdomen, scenting the familiar scent of maple wood and apples. A hand landed on his head, stroking it in comfort. Zhuo Yichen let out a small purr, something only pups make.

He was lifted up by his father. “Are you lonely? Do you want to play with A-die?” Zhuo Yichen nodded, hugging his father’s neck.

His father chuckled, moving off from their spot. Zhuo Yichen glanced over his father’s shoulder, seeing the path to Frost Pavilion get smaller with each step.

~~~~~~

The first snowfall started when the temperature dropped lower than before. Zhuo Yichen stood at the open doors of his mother’s room, staring up at the grey sky in wonder. Little snowflakes fluttered to the ground.

A thin layer of snow covered the surface of their home. It looked magical for him.

“Chen’er,” his mother called and he scampered over to her side where she sat peeling mandarin oranges for him and Zhuo Yixuan. 

His brother smiled widely at him, pushing a plate of sweets piled high.

“Eat, didi,” Zhuo Yixuan urged and Zhuo Yichen took a big bite into the first pastry he grabbed. 

Their mother chuckled, brushing crumbs off his stuffed cheeks. She chided him to take smaller bites before offering an orange slice in exchange for the pastry.

Zhuo Yichen took the offered slice, biting into the soft flesh and watched the snowfall from the doors. Their father came in not long after and Zhuo Yichen was excited to see him. Everyone was here to spend their time together.

Zhuo Yichen squealed in delight when he was picked up. He was set down on his father’s lap. Zhuo Yixuan grinned at him and their mother smiled sweetly. The room was filled with warmth, happiness and laughter, along with the smell of oranges and brewed tea.

Zhuo Yichen soaked up the moment as much as he could. He ate his fill of pastries and oranges. He drank a light sweet tea his mother had made. His parents rubbed their wrists on him, scent marking him as a reminder that he was still loved.

He snuggled in their hold, refusing to let go. Zhuo Yixuan huffed an amused laugh before being roped in to play with Zhuo Yichen. They chased each other around the room until Zhuo Yichen was satisfied.

He grinned at his older brother but his gaze kept returning to look out at the garden. The image of the pretty person all alone in the room was seared in his mind.

He grabbed a slice of lotus pancake that was individually wrapped in oil paper. He hid the pancake in his pocket. He’ll get a scolding from his caretaker for dirtying his clothes but he wanted to give the pretty person something to eat. 

He contemplated grabbing another when Zhuo Yixuan sneakily passed him another wrapped lotus pancake. His brother gave him a knowing smile and they busied themselves trying to hide the little treat. Their parents noticed their little plan but chose not to say anything. 

They shared a smile above their sons’ heads and continued to watch them giggle at each other. Zhuo Yichen returned to his room with his little snacks in hand. He waited for his caretaker to leave. Once she stepped through the open doors, he quickly dash to the side. He peeked out from his room door, finding no one around and quickly took off. 

He ran towards Frost Pavilion, checking again for anyone following him before slipping through the half opened doors. He made his way in. He looked around for the pretty man until he found him sitting by the veranda, watching the snowfall too. 

Zhuo Yichen slowly approached the pretty man and almond shaped eyes met his gaze. He stopped short from getting closer, pulling out the oiled paper. He crouched slowly, placing the pastry down and looked up to find the pretty man tracking his movements with his eyes.

Zhuo Yichen quickly stood up, knowing he couldn't stay long and immediately took off. He squeezed past the half open doors and ran straight to his room before he was caught. 

He couldn’t stop smiling; his caretaker questioned him nicely. He shook his head, refusing to answer. His caretaker undressed him, helping him into the wooden tub for his bath. He played with the water, thinking of meeting the pretty man again. It felt like a secret game that only he was a part of and no one will know.

During the day, Zhuo Yichen pretended he was on an adventure, seeking treasure or fighting ‘yāos’ in the garden. He mimicked the stories his mother told him about, swinging a stick around and pretended it was Yún Guāng Sword.

The servants found it cute when he dashed around the hallways. Sometimes he would crouched by the garden, digging through the sand and stones and getting his clothes dirty. His mother would lightly scold him but her hands were gentle when she cleaned his sandy streaked cheeks with a handkerchief.

In his adventures, he would find little things that reminded him of the pretty man. A smooth marble stone that shimmered in the light. It was like the pretty man's silver hair. A leaf with yellow patterns that resembles the gold hair beads. A handful of almond nuts like the pretty man's almond shaped eyes. A blossom flower was like the scent he smelled when he sneaks into the Frost Pavilion.

Each time he enters the room—sneakily as possible— the pretty man sat by the veranda as if waiting for him.

Zhuo Yichen felt excited as any little child would. He gifted the pretty man his little gifts, never staying any longer than he should. The pretty man would watch him, never saying a word and Zhuo Yichen wonders if he can't speak. 

The pretty man glanced down at his latest gift, a white magnolia flower, held in Zhuo Yichen's little hand. Zhuo Yichen watched the way his eyes would soften a little bit. He held the flower out, waiting to see what the pretty man would do. His little arms started to waver and Zhuo Yichen slowly lowered his arm when fingers, long and slender, gently took the flower from him. 

Zhuo Yichen smiled widely at the pretty man and left with a little wave. He never asked for the man’s name, afraid that if he finds out, he'll tell his family by accident. The man never asked for his name either. It became a silent promise between them and Zhuo Yichen felt like he made a real friend. 

“You seemed happy, Chen’er,” his mother commented, spooning a barley dessert for him. 

His mother felt well enough to have lunch with her sons. They were both excited and happy to eat with her. She prepared their favourite dishes and Zhuo Yichen kicked his little legs from the stone chair.

Today they were eating underneath the magnolia tree with a cool breeze breezing by. 

“Did you make a new friend?” She asked hopefully but Zhuo Yichen shook his head. 

He hardly steps out from the home. The children was still mean to him and he refused to play with them.

“They still call me names,” he muttered and Zhuo Yixuan rubbed his back gently in comfort. 

“Oh,” their mother said sadly. “Then…did you have fun with your little adventures?” she smiled.

She has seen him play in the garden. His little adventures could be heard from her open room doors. She's caught glimpses of how careful he was whenever he picked up his little ‘gifts' before scampering off to places she couldn't see him. Her youngest child reminded her of dandelion seeds, flying off whenever the wind took them.

He'll come back with dirt on the edge of his robes or sand streaked cheeks but his eyes would be bright, filled with excitement and happiness. She isn't sure what changed but she adored the look on his face. It suited him very well. She chose not to question him further and plated their plates with food. 

“Mhm,” Zhuo Yichen answered, eating his food with great delight. “Mama, I like this one.” He pointed to the braised meat patty with a slice of lotus root on it. 

“I'll make it for you another time,” she smiled and Zhuo Yichen happily ate. 

When they were full and satisfied, Zhuo Yichen had pocketed a few pastries. His mother took note of it and grew curious. He was never really a sweet person and like any mother was, she followed her motherly instincts to find out.

Zhuo Yichen eagerly left like he was in a hurry. He didn't realized his mother was quietly following him with careful steps. He dashed across the empty hallways, carefully carrying his pastries when he turned down the familiar path.

Frost Pavilion. 

Zhuo Yichen's mother hurriedly went after him, suddenly afraid for her son. She couldn't keep up with his little speed. She watched in dawning horror when he slipped past the barrier. Her heart sank.

The one thing stopping her from catching him was the barrier. She couldn't get past it even if she wanted too. She isn't a Zhuo and she could see her son standing by the veranda.

There is only one person she didn't want Zhuo Yichen to be with.

Zhu Yan quietly sat by the veranda, watching Zhuo Yichen. They stared at each other until Zhuo Yichen opened his little hands and showed Zhu Yan the pastries. 

Colours of golden brown, pastel green and pink sat in his palm. Zhuo Yichen waited, standing still in hopes to not scare Zhu Yan away. He doesn't know the story of why Zhu Yan was in here but he waited patiently like how his mother always told him to be.

Zhu Yan eventually took the pastries from Zhuo Yichen's hand and looked at it. His expression looked surprised and fond.

"For you," Zhuo Yichen said softly, shifting on the spot with a little blush on his cheeks. "It's tasty."

Zhu Yan lifted his head up when he spotted Zhuo Yichen's mother by the door. His eyes darted back to her son. He nodded at him. 

Zhuo Yichen smiled again. "Bye bye," he chirped, waving at Zhu Yan and quickly headed out of the room.

He didn't see his mother when she hid herself again. He ran past her with a wide smile. As soon as he was gone, she stepped out, glancing back at the open doors. She watched Zhu Yan lightly bit into one pastry when a single tear fell from his eyes. For the first time she felt the cruelty and pitifulness for Zhu Yan being locked in the room. She turned, ready to leave and glanced at him one last time before following Zhuo Yichen.

Ever since that day, Zhuo Yichen's mother kept a closer eye on her son. She never questioned him but softly hinted about it. Zhuo Yichen refused to answer, nodding when he wanted to or keeping quiet.

She never pushed him. Zhuo Yichen never asked either. She would watch him play by himself, seeing the mirror image of the loneliness her son and Zhu Yan had. It was achingly sad to witness.

She followed him whenever he dashes off into Zhu Yan's room. Every time she peeked in, Zhu Yan did nothing but accept his little gifts. 

She's never seen her son smile so widely and happily. Her little son who was bullied and called a demon child had befriended a yāo locked in their own home. In return, Zhu Yan entertained her son, allowing him to enter and leave whenever he pleases and Zhuo Yichen never said a word about it. 

She hid herself again when Zhuo Yichen skipped past the barrier, humming a happy childish tune. She watched him leave, rushing off once he reached a certain point. She turned to find Zhu Yan standing by the door, looking at her. She flinched and neither said anything. 

“I won't hurt him,” Zhu Yan whispered to her, slowly turning away. “I have no reason to hurt him.”

“Why?” She blurted out, wanting to know. 

“Maybe…” he trailed and she felt the sadness in his voice. “He hasn't hurt me at all.”

He left her alone, heading to his bed and she left with his words in her ears. Pain was a powerful tool and she saw the invisible cracks on Zhu Yan's body.

~~~~~~

Zhuo Yichen kept his little secret for months. The winter season has ended and spring has come. He wanted to play with his brother, tugging on Zhuo Yixuan's hand with soft pleas. 

“Gē,” he whined, pulling on Zhuo Yixuan's hand. “You promised to play with me today.” 

Zhuo Yixuan looked helpless for a moment. He did promise his brother but their father called him for an important meeting. He was going to receive Yún Guāng Sword today but he didn't want to disappoint his brother too.

One of the caretakers came, gently untangling Zhuo Yichen's fingers. Zhuo Yichen shook the caretaker's hand away.

“No!” Zhuo Yichen cried out stubbornly and turned to Zhuo Yixuan. “You promised!” 

“Didi, I—” 

“Xuan'er, come,” their father called, interrupting them and headed over.

Zhuo Yichen teared up at the sight of his father. “Baba, gē promised to play with me today,” he said but his father gave him a stern look. 

“Chen'er, today is an important day for your brother. He'll play with you another time. Listen to your nanny.” 

“No!” Zhuo Yichen yelled.

“Didi…” Zhuo Yixuan muttered softly, torn between comforting him or gently pushing him away.

“Chen'er!” His father raised his voice and both boys flinched. “Enough.” 

“What's going on?” Their mother said, slowly approaching them.

She heard the commotion and came to investigate. She suddenly doubled over, coughing harshly into her handkerchief. She swayed on the spot, almost collapsing.

“Mama!” Both boys cried, rushing towards her and their father quickly steadied her. 

“I'm fine,” she smiled but everyone smelt the coppery iron from her lips. She cleared her throat again. “Chen'er, why don't you play with mama today?” 

“You're in no condition to entertain him now,” their father said, looking worried and perplexed at her. "He's old enough to not be entertained.” 

She shot him a stern look. “He's only five,” she whispered harshly and Zhuo Yichen suddenly felt invisible for his young age.

“He's old enough and shouldn't be crying. Alpha men shouldn't shed tears when things don't go accordingly.” 

“Dear!” Their mother growled lowly before turning to cough into her handkerchief. 

“Baba, mama,” Zhuo Yixuan softly said. “Mama you should go back. It's alright baba. Didi is still too young to understand." He turned to Zhuo Yichen with a placating smile. "Didi, we'll play tomorrow okay?”

Zhuo Yichen went quiet. He softly nodded in agreement and neither of them liked how quiet he was. He smelt of curdled milk and salty tears.

Zhuo Yixuan reached out to try and comfort him but Zhuo Yichen took a step back. Tears filled Zhuo Yichen's eyes. He bolted from them. They cried his name out but it washed over him when he felt hurt and lonely. 

“Second young master!” His caretakers cried out, chasing after him.

Zhuo Yichen willed his legs to move faster. He ran to the one place he felt safe from everything. He slipped past the barriers and headed to hide behind the big bed.

He saw Zhu Yan glancing at him before he heard the voices calling for Zhuo Yichen. The little pup hoped Zhu Yan wouldn't announce his whereabouts.

Zhuo Yichen stayed silent, hearing their voices calling for him. He knew they wouldn't dare step foot into this room. It's the one place everyone was forbidden to enter. He waited until it was silent. 

“You can come out now.” 

Zhuo Yichen jolted from Zhu Yan's soft voice. It sounded amused and sad at the same time. He crawled out from his hiding spot, staying still before waiting.

“Are they gone?” he asked, trying to see over the bed frame. 

“They won't come in here,” Zhu Yan answered, watching Zhuo Yichen stand up and brush his clothes with precise movements. “Why are you running from them?” 

Zhuo Yichen wrinkled his little nose. “They weren't going to let me play with gē.” 

Zhu Yan hummed in reply, leaning further back against the pillar he was leaning on. “And you ran in here instead?” Zhuo Yichen shuffled on the spot. “Why?” 

“Because pretty gēge looked lonely and here feels safe,” Zhuo Yichen answered and his answer stunned Zhu Yan. “Why are you here? Don't you want to play outside?” Zhuo Yichen asked curiously.

Zhu Yan looked away from Zhuo Yichen's curious eyes. “No, I don't want to play outside,” he lied and Zhuo Yichen stepped closer to sit next to Zhu Yan. 

“Why?” 

“Because I can't leave here.” Something about Zhu Yan's answer seemed to displease Zhuo Yichen. 

“Are you being punished?” Zhuo Yichen asked and he looked down at his shoes, playing with the edge of his sleeve. “Baba scolds me when I don't listen. I don't like being scolded.” 

“Oh?” Zhu Yan questioned with a playful tone. “Did you get scolded today? What did you do to make your father scold you?”

Zhuo Yichen pouted, drawing invisible circles on the floor with his finger. “That I shouldn't cry. I'm a big boy now and-and-and men shouldn't cry.” 

He didn't see the way Zhu Yan's eyes softened.

“Just men or alpha men?” Zhu Yan asked.

Zhuo Yichen glanced up with a shy look. “Alpha men,” he answered and Zhu Yan’s expression made Zhuo Yichen pause. 

“Men are allowed to cry, you know,” Zhu Yan said to him. “Alpha men or omega men or anyone in general. It's okay to cry.” 

“Pretty gēge, did you ever cry when you're punished?” 

Zhu Yan didn't answer him for a long moment. “No, because I wasn't allowed to," he eventually answered.

Zhuo Yichen suddenly crawled closer to Zhu Yan and sat by his side.

“Can I stay here?” he asked, looking up at Zhu Yan with pleading eyes. 

Zhu Yan's lips quirked up in a quiet smile. “You can stay…stay as long as you like, Xiao Zhuo.” 

Zhuo Yichen's eyes lit up. He made himself comfortable by Zhu Yan's side and rested his little weight against Zhu Yan's arm.

They ended up watching the birds fly into the garden, chirping away. Zhuo Yichen softly named the birds based on their colours and Zhu Yan hummed in agreement. Zhuo Yichen didn't know how long he would stay with Zhu Yan but he felt comfortable by the yāo's side.

He found the peaches and apple blossoms scent to be comforting and pleasant, making him lean closer to Zhu Yan. The omega yāo did nothing. Zhuo Yichen rubbed his eyes in a way that showed a pup was tired until they heard someone's voice calling him. 

“Didi, where are you?” Zhuo Yixuan's voice echoed down the hallway. “Didi, it's time to eat.”

Zhuo Yichen perked up in excitement. “It's gē!” He quickly got up, sadness forgotten and rushed off to find his brother.  

He briefly forgot to bid Zhu Yan goodbye but returned later in the evening with a handful of pastries.

“Pretty gēge,” Zhuo Yichen said, rushing in with a wide smile. “Look, I got snacks for you." He presented the pastries to Zhu Yan. 

Zhu Yan had a plate prepared for him beforehand and Zhuo Yichen carefully plated the pastries before presenting it to Zhu Yan again. They sat by the table this time. Zhuo Yichen started telling Zhu Yan about his afternoon until night fell. He scurried off after bidding Zhu Yan goodbye.

The fight from this morning was forgotten. He was brimming with happiness that no one wanted to break. Zhuo Yichen's mother knew why. She followed him one day to see what he was doing in Zhu Yan's room. She peeked around the doorframe, watching Zhuo Yichen teach Zhu Yan how to play a child's game. 

The yāo looked confused and tried to follow. He messed up a few times, eliciting a bright giggle from Zhuo Yichen.

Zhuo Yichen's mother covered her mouth. Tears gathered in her eyes. It's been awhile since she's heard her son laugh like that. The other children wouldn't let him play and he's always by himself and alone. 

Zhuo Yixuan tried to make time but between learning how to wield Yún Guāng Sword and his studies, he didn't have much time to play with Zhuo Yichen. If this was a secret her son wanted to keep, then she'll keep it to herself.

Zhu Yan hasn't harmed Zhuo Yichen as promised and he continued to entertain the little pup. She felt the connection they had together and chose to keep it quiet.

With that, their secret died with her. 

~~~~~~

Spring was nearly ending and the trees were turning green after blooming with flowers. Zhuo Yichen found a stalk of cherry blossoms in full bloom on the ground. The light pink colours of the flower reminded him of his mother and he wanted to show her. He ran to her room, knocking on the door and called to her. 

“Mama,” he said, pushing the door open and waved the stalk of flowers. “Look, I found pretty flowers for you.” 

He entered the room with a bright smile when he was met with silence. He tilted his head in confusion, stepping through the doors. His smile slowly fell where he didn't expect to find his mother's current state of health.

The cherry blossom stalk fell from his slack fingers. Delicate petals fluttered to the ground. 

“Mama?” He called to her but received no answer in return. “Mama, why are you on the floor?”

He went to her and sat down by her lifeless body. She laid haphazardly in a way that her limbs looked twisted. Her bowl laid shattered on the floor with medicine puddling around her hand. Blood stained her fingers. Her arm looked stretched out, as if she was calling for someone or reaching for something.

Her head laid in an awkward angle, having fallen off from her bed. The stench of blood was thick in the air and Zhuo Yichen wasn't sure if it was old or new. Her clothes were dyed in red, turning it into a different colour.

He stared at her before shuffling over to sit where her face was laying. He thought she was playing a new game with him. He slowly brushed her hair away from her face and blinked his eyes. 

Blood drenched her lips and her eyes were closed but she felt cold to touch. His little hands moved to shake her shoulders. He felt her blood stained his fingers. It felt sticky and he didn't like the feeling of it.

“Mama, wake up,” he said, shaking her again. “Mama, the floor is cold.” He spotted a wet cloth beside her and grabbed it.

He tried to wipe her bloody mouth. “Are you in pain mama?” 

She never answered him and he continued to shake her. Why wouldn't she wake up, his little mind asked. The more he shook her, the more blood seeped out from her mouth. 

“Mama is dirty,” he mumbled, wiping her mouth clumsily. 

He kept wiping her mouth, smearing the blood on her chin until it was more red than clean. His tears started to fall from his eyes. 

Why wasn't she waking up?

He didn't know what to do. 

“Mama,” he sniffled loudly and dropped the wet cloth. Blood has started to seep into his robes, dying the white colour into pink. "Mama," he whined.

“Mama, Chen'er is sorry,” he apologised for no reason. “Chen'er is sorry. Chen'er won't cry again. Chen'er won't play in the dirt—mama, wake up.” 

He didn't know what to say but kept calling for her. 

He kept calling until he coughed harshly. He called and shook her hard before pressing his little nose against the side of her neck where the scent of clary sage and lavender used to be. 

He picked her hand up, placing it on his head in an attempt to mimic her comforting head pats. Her hand fell from his head.

“Mama…” he cried, sniffling again with fat tears rolling down his cheeks.

Then he screamed loudly. 

His screams echoed through the house and it startled everyone within hearing distance. Servants and demon hunters ran to her room with urgency.

Their feet thundered loudly like a thunderstorm. Zhuo Yixuan and his father ran with them. They burst through the door thinking a yāo had broken in or worse, Zhu Yan broke free, but the sight they found was not what they expected. 

Zhuo Yixuan cried for his mother and their father stood shocked in his place. Zhuo Yichen clung onto his mother's shoulders with his face buried in her neck, wailing for her. Zhuo Yixuan's hands fluttered around with fat tears rolling down his cheeks too, unsure of what to do.

The Zhuo family experienced the grief they hadn't experienced in so long and it was Zhuo Yichen's first grief to be felt.

~~~~~~

Grief was something Zhuo Yichen never understood. His mother's death had shocked him, making him distant from his father and brother. But Zhuo Yixuan gripped his hand tightly, never letting go. The funeral procession was long and tiring for him. He doesn't remember much of it but tried to keep his tears at bay. 

He couldn't. His father once tried to stop him from crying before the man himself broke down in a quiet corner. Zhuo Yichen dislikes the colour white. It didn't suit his mother. Soft colours like pastel blue or green, even pink or lilac suited her more.

He was so young to even understand but he knew his mother will never return. He'll never get to feel her warm hugs again or eat the food she would cook for them. He'll never get to hear her sing to him or kiss him goodnight. He won't be able to show her the little things he would find nor would he be able to hide behind her skirt whenever he has to meet someone new. 

He wanted to see her again.

He wanted his mother and Zhuo Yichen didn't realize he made his way to the one place that felt safe and comfortable. 

He stood in front of Zhu Yan's bed and the omega yāo shifted to pat his side of the bed. Zhuo Yichen climbed onto the bed, laying his head on the pillow.

Peaches and apple blossoms were strong and it brought a sense of comfort and safety. He felt Zhu Yan's fingers gently carded through his hair in an attempt to comfort him. 

It hurts, his little mind told him. It hurts and he wanted his mother so badly. 

“Cry. No one will hear you or see you cry. It's okay to cry for your mother,” Zhu Yan said and tears glistened in Zhuo Yichen's eyes. “Cry for her, Xiao Zhuo. She loved you very much.” 

Those words were enough for Zhuo Yichen. No one told him to cry and he kept listening to the words of, “You are strong. Men shouldn't cry.” 

More tears glistened in his eyes. He couldn't keep his emotions hidden anymore. He burst out crying. He pressed his face into Zhu Yan's chest and clung onto the white ape yāo's front robes. 

“Mama, I want mama,” Zhuo Yichen cried, feeling himself being pulled closer to Zhu Yan’s chest. “I want mama,” he sobbed. 

“I know,” Zhu Yan whispered softly. “I know.”

Zhu Yan hummed a children's lullaby, trying to soothe the crying pup. He kept stroking Zhuo Yichen's hair. 

Zhuo Yichen continued to cry, soaking Zhu Yan’s robes with his tears until he hiccuped loudly. Zhu Yan kept comforting him. He rubbed soothing circles on Zhuo Yichen's back.

Zhuo Yichen sniffled and clung onto the omega yāo, whimpering if Zhu Yan shifted but never once did Zhu Yan let him go. 

Zhuo Yichen's tears continued to flow. Gentle fingers brushed his tears away and Zhu Yan fed him water. The arms wrapped around him were warm and gentle; his mother's hugs were the same. He stayed in Zhu Yan's hold until he fell asleep to the comforting scent of peaches and apple blossoms.

Zhuo Yichen woke up in his brother's arms. He whined in his sleep, shifting until his brother softly hushed him. He was rocked back to sleep. He woke up again in his brother's room and turned to find Zhuo Yixuan awake. His brother’s eyes were red and his cheeks were wet. 

Zhuo Yichen cried again, pressing his small face into his brother's chest and Zhuo Yixuan hugged him tightly. They curled into each other, seeking the comfort they needed.

Life around the Zhuo mansion was solemn after the funeral. The death of Madam Zhuo was still fresh in everyone's hearts. Servants were extra quiet. Some still cried for the kindness of her and others kept busy to hide their own grief.

Zhuo Yichen sat quietly at his mother's courtyard. Her doors will never open and he still waited for her to open it until Zhuo Yixuan came to get him for lunch and dinner. 

His caretakers tried their best, trying to engage him in playing but he refused. He would run to his mother's room, sitting by the door. He would place the little trinkets he found in front of it, telling her about how he found them.

It painted a picture of sadness for those witnessing it.

Zhuo Yixuan sat next to his brother one day and they stayed in the position, leaning against each other. They watched the clouds go by, whispering so softly no one heard them.

The weeks went by and Zhuo Yichen slipped into Zhu Yan's room. He softly padded in, finding Zhu Yan sitting by the veranda. 

Neither said anything to each other and Zhuo Yichen crawled into Zhu Yan's lap, leaning heavily on his chest. Arms wrapped around him, bringing him close. They stayed in that position until night fell.

Zhuo Yichen repeated the same thing over the next few days and it made everyone worried. Whispers of him being traumatized floated around and his father yelled at anyone who spoke. A child's grief was the hardest to mend and only time could heal it.

Zhuo Yichen laid his head on Zhu Yan's chest, playing with the silver threads on Zhu Yan's robes. The omega yāo had wrapped his arms around the little pup, leaning against the wooden pillar and they watched the birds play with the river water. 

“Mama…” Zhuo Yichen whispered and feeling Zhu Yan shift to look at him. “I found mama on the floor.” 

Zhu Yan hugged him tighter. “You found her?” 

“Mhm. She had blood on her face,” he continued. “I tried to wipe it off but…Pretty gēge, where do you think mama is now?” He shifted to look up at Zhu Yan. “Did mama leave because Chen’er was bad? Did-Did-Did mama leave because—I…hic…because Chen’er is a demon child? Is it…my fault? Is—” 

He couldn't see Zhu Yan's face through the heavy tears and his voice cracked from his hiccups. He was immediately pulled towards Zhu Yan's chest. He felt hands gently holding the back of his head.

“No, Xiao Zhuo,” Zhu Yan said. “It's not your fault. You weren't a bad child. You are not a demon child. You are human, Xiao Zhuo,” he stroked Zhuo Yichen’s head. “Your mother will never return because she died from an illness, not because of you.” He pulled Zhuo Yichen away, cupping his cheeks. 

“Listen to me, Xiao Zhuo. You are a good child. You were never bad and your mother would never blame you for her death. Because none of this is your fault.” 

Zhuo Yichen burst out crying again. He buried his face into Zhu Yan's chest and clung onto the omega yāo's robes. He tried so hard to be good, to understand what it all meant but everyone kept their distance. He didn't understand anything or that he'll never see his mother again.

He buried deeper, hugging the only person who didn't shun him away. Zhuo Yichen wept until he couldn't.

Zhu Yan kept hugging, rocking and comforting him as much as he could and scent marked Zhuo Yichen with the faint scent of peaches and apple blossoms. It was the only way to calm a distressed pup.

“It's okay, Xiao Zhuo. It's okay,” Zhu Yan whispered, rocking them together until Zhuo Yichen had fallen asleep in Zhu Yan's arms. “It'll be okay…” 

And Zhuo Yichen believed in Zhu Yan's words. 

~~~~~~

Seasons changed and the years went by. Zhuo Yichen has grown in the past ten years. The incident when he was ten had made his relationship with Zhu Yan changed. He was caught by his father and could no longer enter Zhu Yan's room like he used to.

Instead, he would sit by the doorframe with Zhu Yan on the other side. The barrier that he couldn't see before, glowed and rippled in front of him. He felt like he was looking at a cage for Zhu Yan. 

No one shouldn't be caged like this and Zhuo Yichen felt the need to free Zhu Yan. He wanted to see the omega yāo smile freely, wishing the sadness and distant grief that hangs over Zhu Yan to go away. He wanted to comfort the omega yāo like how Zhu Yan used to comfort him. 

There were a lot of things Zhuo Yichen wanted to do for Zhu Yan but he couldn't. He could only hope that their relationship wouldn't change at all when he grows older. He presented as an alpha at the age of thirteen with the scent of snow and fresh water.

His father was proud. Zhuo Yixuan smiled at him. They both knew nothing could be done and Zhuo Yichen felt slightly conflicted. He never voiced his thoughts out, keeping it to himself.

He is an alpha and there are expectations he has to uphold.

Zhuo Yichen was fifteen when his brother brought him to his room with a hard look in his eyes. Zhuo Yichen felt something was wrong and his heart beat with anxiety.

“Gē, what's wrong?” He asked his brother and Zhuo Yixuan looked at him with a complicated look. 

“Xiao Chen, do you know why Zhu Yan is here?” Zhuo Yixuan asked and Zhuo Yichen shook his head. 

“You said you would tell me when I was older. Gē, what is going on? Is Zhu Yan hurt?” His scent of snow and fresh water grew sharp and Zhuo Yixuan's eyes softened for him. 

Zhuo Yixuan shook his head. “No. Zhu Yan is…” he sighed, shoulders dropping. “Xiao Chen, I need you to listen to me carefully. In case anything happens to me, Zhu Yan's well-being will fall onto you and I need you to promise me that you'll help free him.” 

“Gē, you're not making any sense right now. I'm not like you. I can't free Zhu Yan just like that."

“Zhu Yan isn't a guest in this house. He's a bargaining chip between Dà Huāng and the mortal realm,” Zhuo Yixuan explained and his words shocked his brother. “He's what holds the treaty between Tiandu and Dà Huāng in place, as a bride in terms of marriage.” 

“Marriage? Who is—Gē, are you going to marry him?” 

Zhuo Yixuan grimaced and it was very different from his usual calm looks he always wore. “As per the treaty, our family hasn't fulfilled it. I don't think marrying him would free him and he'll be forever chained to us if we do. Xiao Chen, what has Zhu Yan told you?” 

“Nothing. He has never told me anything,” Zhuo Yichen said. “What treaty is this? How come I've never heard about it?” 

“It would be safer if you didn't know or get involved. Father didn't want you to know previously but since he found you in Zhu Yan's room those years ago, things have changed. Zhu Yan's main purpose here is to birth an heir that can wield Yún Guāng Sword but you remembered that day when he was pregnant.” 

“He lost the baby, didn't he?” Zhuo Yichen asked softly, remembering the twisted pain on Zhu Yan's face and blood.

Zhuo Yixuan nodded, blinking his tears away and took a deep breath. A serious expression took over his face.

“Xiao Chen, our family has imprisoned Zhu Yan in that room for four thousand years. He hasn't left since then and they severed his bond with his alpha.” Zhuo Yichen's eyes widened at each word. "It's a complete mess and it feels impossible to free him right now.” 

“Why do you want to free him?” Zhuo Yichen asked.

Zhuo Yixuan looked at his brother with tears gleaming in his eyes. “Because he's like a trapped bird with severed wings and it isn't fair to him."

"Gē…" Zhuo Yichen knew his brother was right.

Zhu Yan was like a trapped bird. Pretty and lonely in his cage.

"His mate is alive. I found him," Zhuo Yixuan said with a burning fire in his eyes.

“You did?” Zhuo Yichen knew his brother was looking for something every time he left for a case and Zhuo Yixuan nodded. “How are you going to free him?” 

“The gold bracelets on his arms. I don't know anything about it. There aren't any texts in our family archives about the gold bracelets and,” Zhuo Yixuan lifted Yún Guāng Sword up to look at it. “We don't need him to give us an heir. Yún Guāng Sword will probably never choose a master in this generation and so on.” 

Zhuo Yichen remembered his mother's words in a distorted voice, of how he'll wield the sword and become its master one day. But he never told anyone of her story.

He believed in his brother's words and nodded. He wanted to set Zhu Yan free too, having seen how trapped the omega yāo was. He couldn't stand being stuck in his room for so many hours, so he was amazed at Zhu Yan being able to stay in the same room for four thousand years. 

“Gē” Zhuo Yichen softly called. “Father wouldn't agree to what you're planning to do. What if he kills Zhu Yan? Wouldn’t the treaty be dissolved and a war will break out between Dà Huāng and here?”

“Father won't kill him. He's important for the treaty and Zhu Yan can’t die unless I kill him with Yún Guāng Sword but it’s pointless if I can’t wield it. Without its power, there is no chance of killing Zhu Yan.” 

Zhuo Yichen grew silent, contemplating his thoughts. He felt the deep need to free Zhu Yan. All the years the yāo sat in the same spot, entertaining Zhuo Yichen until now. It wasn't fair at all.

“Okay, I’ll help you free Zhu Yan, gē.” Zhuo Yichen looked determined and Zhuo Yixuan smiled at his brother.

“Just remember this, it isn’t Zhu Yan’s fault if anything happens. There’s very little that we know of him and he refuses to tell me anything either.” 

“He’s stubborn.” Zhuo Yichen huffed and Zhuo Yixuan agreed too. “But I wouldn’t blame him if something happens unless he hurts you. That is a different story.” 

“He won’t hurt me,” Zhuo Yixuan chuckled, looking fondly at the floor and Zhuo Yichen decided he didn’t want to know about his brother’s growing attraction to Zhu Yan. 

It was the last words that Zhuo Yichen ever heard from his brother and the last time he would see him too.

Zhuo Yixuan was called away urgently and it left Zhuo Yichen alone again. He completed his studies for the day and he was returning to his room when the night had turned red. He looked up at the sky with curiosity. Few servants and demon hunters were awake, watched the moon turned red too and murmurs of fear started to spread.

He heard them, frowning deeply. A blood moon was always ominous. His heart beat erratically like danger was approaching. Zhuo Yixuan had gone to Mount Kunlun with their father and a few other demon hunters.

Something didn't feel right. It reminded him of the day he found his mother's dead body. It felt exactly the same, that looming sense of dread.

Someone screamed loudly and Zhuo Yichen ran to the source, finding servants and other demon hunters standing around the floor.

"Move!" Zhuo Yichen yelled and they parted.

He froze at the sight of bodies lying scattered on the floor. He knew some of them.

They were demon hunters who greeted him and watched him when he was growing up. They laid on the floor, bleeding from their eyes and mouth. One of the demon hunters near by, knelt down and touched their necks to feel for their pulse. He immediately pulled back with a look of alarmed.

“They’re dead,” he said and others started to panic.

Zhuo Yichen’s eyes widened, glancing around at the bodies and fear started to sink its teeth into his heart. He bolted from the spot, heading towards Zhu Yan’s room.

He found the barrier was gone.

He stuck his hand through, finding he could enter. He stepped in with hurried steps. 

“Zhu Yan!” Zhuo Yichen called, looking for the omega yāo. “Zhu Yan, where are you?” 

He hoped to find the yāo but received no answer nor could he find him. 

“Zhuo daren!” Someone yelled for him. “Zhuo daren!” 

His brother and father aren’t around and the house was left to him. He ran out, nearly crashing into a frantic demon hunter who looked to be on the verge of tears. 

“Zhuo daren, terrible news!” 

“What is it?” Zhuo Yichen asked, looking at him frantically and the demon hunter swallowed hard.

“News came from Mount Kunlun. Everyone…is dead…” Zhuo Yichen’s eyes widened and his heart thundered loudly. “Zhuo daren, I’m sorry.” 

“My brother? What about my brother?” He grabbed hold of the demon hunter’s front robes and shook him hard. “Where’s my brother!?” He screamed.

He dreaded the next answer when someone started yelling.

“Zhu Yan is loose! Zhu Yan broke free!” 

Zhuo Yichen’s head whipped up and saw Zhu Yan walking towards them. He shoved the demon hunter away, running towards Zhu Yan. He wanted to ask the omega yāo where was he when Zhuo Yichen froze.

Something was off with the way Zhu Yan walked. It looked like he was under an alpha command. There was the briefest thought, the command was his brother's.

Zhu Yan's eyes were glazed and he walked past Zhuo Yichen like he never saw him. Zhuo Yichen caught a whiff of an unfamiliar scent. It smelt like flowers and earth but he couldn’t decipher what it was when Zhu Yan entered into his own room and collapsed onto the floor. 

Zhuo Yichen wanted to rush over but a group of demon hunters ran and stood guard, preventing anyone from entering with their swords drawn. Fan Ying appeared. He was second in command besides his father and someone Zhuo Yichen trusted the most.

Zhuo Yichen couldn’t hear over the sound of his beating heart when Fan Ying presented him Yún Guāng Sword. The sword was wrapped in the familiar white robes of his brother. 

“I’m sorry, Zhuo daren,” Fan Ying whispered. “Zhuo Yixuan died in battle.” 

“Who…how…” Zhuo Yichen sobbed, taking the sword into his arms. The scent of sandalwood and cedarwood was heavy on his brother’s robe and Zhuo Yichen wanted to keep the scent alive. “How did he…” 

Fan Ying swallowed hard. He glanced at the guards standing outside Zhu Yan’s door.

“Zhu Yan…killed him and your father," Fan Ying said softly.

Anger, hot and boiling suddenly burned in Zhuo Yichen’s veins. His eyes widened and he slowly turned his head to Zhu Yan’s room. The one person he thought wouldn’t harm his brother. 

The one person he called as a friend. 

The one person who didn’t harm him at all was the one who killed the last of his family.

He felt sick. He felt angry. He felt hurt and betrayed. He felt emotions he didn’t know bubbling in him. He wanted to scream at Zhu Yan, to beg and hit the yāo's chest. He wanted to throw insults but begged to bring his family back.

It was an impossible thing to do even for a powerful yāo.

“I’ll kill him. I’ll kill him!” Zhuo Yichen screamed, lunging for the door but Fan Ying quickly grabbed him around his waist and held him in place. 

“Zhuo daren, you mustn’t,” Fan Ying pleaded and Zhuo Yichen turned to him with hurtful and tearful gaze. “The treaty is important. You cannot kill him.” 

“He killed my brother!” 

“I know but Dà Huāng and the mortal realm cannot go into war. As the last remaining living Zhuo, his well-being falls onto you now.” 

In a fit of anger and grief, Zhuo Yichen made the rash decisions that would destroy his bond with Zhu Yan now. But he didn't care. He didn't care when his world was shattered with hard grief and sadness. 

“Then lock him up in the room. Close the doors and don’t ever let him out. He can rot in the room for all I care!” 

“Zhuo daren, please think carefully. Once the order is given, Zhu Yan can never step out again.” 

“I don’t care what happens to him,” Zhuo Yichen growled. “He can kill himself in there.”

The promise he made with his brother was broken. Fan Ying slowly released him and he fell to his knees, hugging Yún Guāng Sword tightly to his chest. Zhuo Yichen sobbed brokenly.

He was alone again.

Fan Ying felt sorry for both of them; for Zhuo Yichen and Zhu Yan. He gave the order and the strongest barrier was erected. 

Fan Ying looked at Zhu Yan’s prone form by the door. He remembered the moments that happened before. Willow shaped eyes bore into him, holding onto Zhu Yan tightly.

Fan Ying knew that this treaty has done nothing but harm everyone around them. He closed the doors, watching as Zhu Yan's form disappeared behind it and locked it.

Chapter Text

Zhuo Yichen sat in his room alone with the deep feeling of heavy sadness in his heart. He stared blankly up at the night sky; crying every night for his brother. The moon was clear tonight and the cold breeze from the mountains blew in. He hugged his knees tightly to his chest when someone entered his room. 

Light robes fluttered behind the person as they sat next to him in one fluid motion. He slowly turned his head, finding a girl; maybe older, smiling at him with a kind smile. Her cheeks were rosy red from the cold winds and her doe-like eyes seemed understanding and kind. 

She held a small bouquet of flowers in front of him. His gaze shifted to stare at it. He's never seen these type of flowers before. The only knows he knows were the magnolia flowers and the pagoda flowers in his home.

The latter was what his brother used to give Zhu Yan. It brought an ache to his chest. Fresh tears spilled from his eyes again, trailing down his cheeks.

The girl jerked her hand at him, indicating he should take it. He took the bouquet, brushing a finger lightly on the delicate small flowers. The petals were in colours of dark purple, blue and white. Their scent was soft and earthy like the scent he smelt on Zhu Yan that day. 

“They are from Dà Huāng,” she said, breaking Zhuo Yichen's thoughts, making him face her with his tear stained face. “They are wildflowers, only grown there.” 

He looked back at the flowers. “Is it?” He asked softly, voice hoarse and dry. 

The girl nodded. She pulled her knees close to her chest, similar to Zhuo Yichen’s position. “Yea. They are very sturdy. They grow in the harsh environment of Dà Huāng and still look very pretty."

She rearranged her skirt, hugging herself to fend the cold off but it didn't deter her at all. "Despair brings grief and sometimes we lose our way in the harsh time but it doesn’t mean we have to stay in misery.” 

Zhuo Yichen faced her fully again. Her words seemed to pierce him. But he didn’t feel the anger that should come from her words. It seemed right to hear it from her.

She looked at him and smiled again. 

“It’ll be hard but the outcome will be better. Like these wildflowers. Sometimes it’s okay to stop and sometimes it feels like the road is hard but giving up to be drown in, isn’t right either. I think you can do it," she said.

Zhuo Yichen huffed a wet laugh. “Who are you? You shouldn’t be in my room.” 

She grinned. “I’m Wen Xiao. I’m Fan Ying’s daughter…adopted daughter technically, I'm the Baize Goddess apprentice.” 

“The Baize Goddess…” Zhuo Yichen whispered and Wen Xiao nodded. “I’m Zhuo Yichen.” 

Wen Xiao glanced at the Yún Guāng Sword sitting on the sword display stand in front of them. “I knew your brother.”

“You did?” 

“He was looking for someone in Dà Huāng. Your brother saved me once before too.”

“My brother was looking—” Zhuo Yichen's eyes widened. “His mate," he mumbled and Wen Xiao pretended to not hear the light whisper.

She contemplated her next choice of words. “Xiao Zhuo,” she tested and Zhuo Yichen flinched at the nickname. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—” 

“No…it’s just….someone used to call me that," Zhuo Yichen looked away with a grimace. "It’s fine, I think it’s okay if you call me that.” 

Wen Xiao grinned at him. She suddenly thrusted her hand out for him to take. “Then, Xiao Zhuo. Let’s be friends.” 

Zhuo Yichen’s eyes stared at her in shock. She wasn’t afraid of him nor did she call him names. He glanced at her hand and back up at her. Her gaze spoke more than anything before he softly grabbed her hand. 

“Okay, Wen Xiao.” He smiled at her for the first time since the death of his family.

~~~~~~

Wen Xiao managed to coax Zhuo Yichen out of his room. It was the first time he stepped out since he locked himself in there during his grieving. Fan Ying stood outside, waiting patiently until he saw the two of them.

The look of relief on his face made Zhuo Yichen feel guilty. He didn't want to worry the older beta and felt he failed in that line. Fan Ying smiled reassuringly at him.

"It's good to see you, Zhuo daren," Fan Ying greeted and Zhuo Yichen's eyes shone with unshed tears.

"Thank you for running the bureau in my stead," Zhuo Yichen said, clasping his hands in front and bowed in thanks.

Fan Ying gently held his arms, stopping him from going down further. The older beta shook his head until he spotted Yún Guāng Sword tied to the side of Zhuo Yichen's belt. The gaze didn't go unnoticed.

Zhuo Yichen untied Yún Guāng and held onto it in a tight grip. He pulled the marked strings off the sword, letting the silk cloth fall like liquid trickling down to the ground. He gripped the sword’s hilt and the crystal suddenly glowed. Fan Ying’s eyes widened and Wen Xiao looked surprised as well.

“It has never glowed like that,” Fan Ying said quietly. 

Zhuo Yichen looked surprised by the sword's reaction to him. For all the years, he's seen the sword being unresponsive in his brother's hand; it finally responded to him. He wanted to laugh at the irony of things.

Wen Xiao suddenly grinned at him.

“Xiao Zhuo, how do you feel?” She asked and Fan Ying raised an eyebrow at the casually way she addressed Zhuo Yichen. 

“I feel a power flowing through me,” Zhuo Yichen said and he looked at Fan Ying for guidance. “I’ve never seen it like this before. Is this supposed to happen?” 

“The sword chose you,” Fan Ying answered. “You’re the owner of Yún Guāng Sword now.” 

Zhuo Yichen stared at the sword. He felt the sword thrum with power as if greeting him in familiarity. The blade pulsed with a blue glow and power with an icy feeling, flowing through his veins, before settling in his meridians. It felt new and foreign to him.

No one knew how to use the sword and Zhuo Yichen was lost for a moment. There has never been a chosen sword wielder for Yún Guāng for many generations.

Zhuo Yixuan's words rang in Zhuo Yichen's memory. That he never wanted Zhuo Yichen to wield Yún Guāng. His grey blue eyes blazed with a cold burn. Since Yún Guāng Sword has chosen him, he'll train hard to harness its power and avenge his family.

His inexperience in wielding the sword was obvious. No matter how he tried to use the sword, it fell from his grip or he'll injure himself. He cannot give up just because he doesn't know how.

Zhuo Yixuan used to chuckle at him, always praising him when he decided to put his mind to it. Zhuo Yichen sat in the library, studying the correct ways to hold a sword with Wen Xiao by his side. He grew to like her company, finding the calmness in her presence.

Fan Ying found a sword master for him and he was taken under the master's wing. Zhuo Yichen trained hard. He has to make it perfect. He had to master Yún Guāng Sword to at least protect himself and his new friend.

His friendship with Wen Xiao grew even more as a year passed by. He's gotten better in wielding Yún Guāng. He knew simply practising the movements won't help him if he can't use it in actual combat.

He made the decision and joined the demon hunting recruits. The recruits gave him a wide breath of space, fearing him as the Zhuo heir. The only heir.

He tampered his emotions down, ignoring their fear of him and trained hard. He practice using Yún Guāng Sword, feeling it grow in power along with him as he used it in actual combat. He studied about yāos with Wen Xiao, learning from her and how vast her knowledge was about them. 

He didn't think that he'll be left alone again so soon after more than a yea has passed. He had found comfort in Wen Xiao's presence but didn't want to keep her away from whatever duties she has as the Baize Goddess apprentice.

“Where are you going?” He asked her one day when he followed her to the front doors of his home.

“To Dà Huāng. I have to see my master and report back to her,” Wen Xiao smiled.

“How long will you be gone?” He softly asked and Wen Xiao found his quiet pouting cute.

“I don't know. Maybe a year,” she hummed, clasping her hands behind her back. “I've been here for two years, Xiao Zhuo. I'm just visiting master and I'll be back.” 

“Okay…” 

She smiled. “Try and make some more friends,” she said, finding how similar his reaction was to a certain pagoda tree yāo. 

“It's…not—that…” he fell silent and Wen Xiao knew how he is.

It isn't the lack of trying but she considered how his past was. Nearly everyone feared him and the sword he wields. It is a dual edge feeling for Zhuo Yichen. 

She gently pat his shoulder. “Do you mind following me to the outskirts of Tiandu?” 

Zhuo Yichen frowned. “That area is dangerous and—” 

“It's okay. There's someone waiting for me.” 

He didn't questioned further and escorted her out to the outskirts of Tiandu. He could have left after sending her there but curiosity burned in him. He wanted to know who this person picking Wen Xiao up was.

He hid behind a thick row of trees. He slowly peered around one of the tree trunk and found Wen Xiao waiting by the edge of the treeline. Something dark flickered from the corner. Wen Xiao turned to smile widely at someone standing in the shadows. 

Zhuo Yichen couldn't see. Wen Xiao said something softly and walked straight to the person. Zhuo Yichen quickly stepped out from his hiding spot and followed them. He rounded the corner only to find no one there. He crouched down, finding leaves of a pagoda tree on the floor with a very faint scent of pagoda flowers and fresh earth in the air.

He headed back to the Zhuo mansion, a place he used to call home. But now it felt empty and lonely. The servants that used to work for his family had ran away, leaving only the demon hunters or what's left of them.

Despite being reputable before, the Demon Hunting Bureau has started to decline in reputation. Those who left his family had run to the Chongwu Group and Zhuo Yichen could not care less about their loyalty or so.

He doesn't need people. 

He doesn't need others. 

He allowed Fan Ying and Situ Ming to handle the accounts of the Demon Hunting Bureau. It wasn't his forte to keep track but he's grateful for the updates they give him. The only thing he could do was train.

He kept practising with Yún Guāng Sword. He practised until blisters formed on his fingers. The sword's rough hilt was not designed to be wielded for long but Zhuo Yichen didn't give up.

When he was done with his training, he walked down the empty hallways with a frown on his face. People avoided him like a plague. He's heard whispers of how he had hardened his heart and turned cold in expression. He ignored them and their whispers.

Words can't hurt him right now. Not since the death of his family.

He turned down the hallway, heading for his room when he suddenly stopped in the middle of his path. He accidentally turned down to the one area he hasn't stepped foot in two years. The one place he used to think was safe—even until now—where he ran past open doors to the one person who didn't shun him away. 

He glanced at the familiar closed doors. A barrier and seal was placed on it. The glowing gold barrier felt like a stain in his life. The yāo that lived in the room was still alive; Zhuo Yichen felt anger and hatred at once for Zhu Yan. 

Angry tears burned in the corner of his eyes. He glared at the closed doors, gritting his teeth hard. His brother will never return alive and it was all Zhu Yan’s fault. He turned around angrily, quickly making his way to his room. 

The hatred continued to burn hot in his heart. His scent of snow and fresh water turned so sharp that he could smell it too. He can't let his emotions run amok because of Zhu Yan. He felt betrayed and hurt that no comforting words could mend his broken heart. He took his anger out during practice.

He swung his sword at the invisible enemy, imagining it was Zhu Yan. He fought against clawed shaped hands. He could hear the gleeful chuckle from the omega yāo.

Zhuo Yichen parried the next invisible attack. He dodged swiping claws and thrust his sword forward before swinging it in a high upwards arc. 

He twirled on the spot, avoiding Zhu Yan's attack. He dropped and rolled on the floor with Yún Guāng Sword pointing upwards to block a clash of a sharp knife. Zhu Yan leaned close with blood stained teeth. He grinned menacingly at Zhuo Yichen. 

“Can you kill me?” Zhu Yan hissed and eyes glowed red. “Can you really kill me to avenge your family, Zhuo Yichen?” 

“I can,” Zhuo Yichen whispered, glaring at Zhu Yan. “I will kill you for what you did to my brother.” 

Zhu Yan's smile seemed to spread wider. He looked wild like a mad yāo. Zhuo Yichen thought it suited him very well.

“You're nothing but a killer.” Zhuo Yichen shoved Zhu Yan back, twirling Yún Guāng Sword around his hand. “And it still hurts that I feel like I could still run to you for help.” 

Zhu Yan tilted his head to one side like an observing creature. “Oh?” He said in a mocking tone.

Zhuo Yichen shook his head to get rid of it. He knows it's his imagination but it felt real. All of it felt too real.

“Then why don't you open the doors and step in? I can't go anywhere since I'm stuck here. Weren't you the one who closed my doors? Didn't you give the order to keep me locked away for good?”

“Because you deserved it!” 

“Did I? Didn't you promise your brother to free me? That I was a caged bird trapped in a cold and lonely room.” 

“If you hadn't killed my brother, I wouldn't have been forced to make that order.” 

Zhu Yan laughed in his face. “Forced? No, Zhuo Yichen, nobody forced you. You gave that order immediately. You were warned but you didn't listen. So now you've trapped me in here just like how you and your brother did!” 

Zhuo Yichen stabbed Zhu Yan through the chest with ragged breathing. Blood dripped from Zhu Yan's grinning lips.

Zhuo Yichen looked up to see no one and the imaginative Zhu Yan was gone. Yún Guāng's blade was clean. It glowed a light blue before dimming to nothing. 

Zhuo Yichen breathed hard, stepping back and took a deep breath. He felt slightly disoriented from the practice or whatever it was. His own mind played tricks on him and it used Zhu Yan as his target. He shook his head and left to change. Sweat was dripping down his back, soaking his collar and he grimaced at the feeling. 

His limbs felt heavy and he shook to get rid of the feeling. Wen Xiao has been gone for a few hours and he felt the cold loneliness creeping in. 

Wasn't he used to this feeling? The feeling of being alone.

Wen Xiao's presence was like a comforting balm for him in his dark road and he was afraid of being alone again. He sighed, putting on a clean, fresh robe and tied his hair into a ponytail. He needed to stop thinking about Zhu Yan. Just the thought of the omega yāo had soured his mood. 

Over the few weeks, he steadily climbed up the ranks and completed his cases easily. It was both impressive and terrifying. He took solo missions not because of the other recruits being afraid of him but more of not wanting to lose other people. He doesn't like working in teams. It was a hard feeling of being silent and awkward with them. It makes it harder to communicate too.

He preferred working alone and no one could argue with him on his choices.

He grew his reputation, earning the respect and fear from the people of Tiandu. He didn't care about his safety when he chased after a bull yāo down the night streets of Tiandu. He raced on top of rooftops, leaping off at the edge and swung Yún Guāng Sword in a decapitating arc. 

The bull yāo’s head flew in the air while its body twitched in a short spazz of momentarily living before falling to the ground. The bull yāo’s body began to disintegrate into fine coloured dusts as how yāo’s die.

Zhuo Yichen watched the coloured dust ascend up to the air until the body was completely gone. 

He knew yāos feared him but they mostly fear the sword in his hand. Yún Guāng Sword is a terrifying weapon and yāos would flinch from the sight itself. Zhuo Yichen wondered if he could kill Zhu Yan with the sword. He also wondered if the omega yāo would disappear in coloured dust like the bull yāo. 

It was a dream and a silent promise to his own heart for revenge. He will kill Zhu Yan.

~~~~~~

Zhuo Yichen never thought he would require help from a yāo. Not just any yāo but one certain pagoda tree yāo. His meeting with Li Lun wasn't how he expected it to be.

Wen Xiao had returned after a year in Dà Huāng, earning a wide smile from Zhuo Yichen. She was excited to see him too. They easily fell into a simple routine together and Wen Xiao demanded he take her on any case.

They teamed up to solve cases—as few as they received—and Zhuo Yichen found it easier to work with Wen Xiao. She would sprout facts, making the connections of which yāos they were looking for. People began to view them as an unstoppable duo.

Much to Fan Ying's headaches whenever his adopted daughter was involved. Zhuo Yichen protected her, sometimes getting injured and incurring her anger. He knew better than to argue with her as she tended to him and bandaged his wounds.

Everything was going well until they received a particular harder case to solve.

Bodies of their comrades were brought back to the bureau and Fan Ying was nervous. Zhuo Yichen and Wen Xiao hurried over where Fan Ying stood in front of the covered bodies.

"Father, what happened?" Wen Xiao asked, avoiding looking at the row of covered bodies.

Zhuo Yichen lifted the cloth up to inspect the bodies. It was gruesome image and Zhuo Yichen grimaced.

"A yāo had cornered them," Fan Ying answered. "Their hearts and other body parts were taken."

Wen Xiao gasped and Zhuo Yichen dropped the cloth. She turned to him and he nodded in answer. Blood slowly seeped into the white cloth told Zhuo Yichen it wasn't long that their comrades had died.

"What did the report say?" Wen Xiao asked, willing her lithe frame to not tremble.

Zhuo Yichen stood next to her in silent support. He pinched her sleeve, letting her know he's here with her. She took a deep breath, trying her best to put on a brave mask and willed her tears away.

"A yāo had slaughtered a whole village outside of Tiandu. It claimed the place as its territory. Whatever remaining survivors are there, ran away," Fan Ying explained. "I advised you both to not take this case. Our men can't handle it and it's too dangerous."

"Then I'll go by myself," Zhuo Yichen said and Wen Xiao shot him a look. "It'll be easier when it's just me."

"Xiao Zhuo, don't be stupid," she hissed. "We don't know what kind of yāo it is and it's too dangerous even for you."

Zhuo Yichen glared at the floor. He could never glare at Wen Xiao. "Then what do we do? Let the yāo continue killing the rest of the villagers? It's already taken our men and other innocent lives. We can't have another taken just because it's dangerous for us."

"What about—" Wen Xiao paused and both men can see the gears turning in her head. "He'll hate me for this," she whispered but Zhuo Yichen heard her clearly. "I think we need help from someone else."

"Who is going to help us? Chongwu group isn't going to casually offer their help. It's because of them that we are in this state. The report was sent to them first before they gave it to us to solve." Zhuo Yichen crossed his arm, holding onto Yún Guāng Sword tightly.

"Not Chongwu group," Wen Xiao said. "Someone from Dà Huāng."

Zhuo Yichen froze. There was only one he could think off and the doors were sealed. The one yāo that is powerful. Zhuo Yichen refused to think about him. He doesn't know how powerful Zhu Yan is since he hasn't seen him fight before. He doubted Zhu Yan would listen to him but something about seeing Zhu Yan stepping out of the mansion made Zhuo Yichen feel conflicted.

"He'll know what kind of yāo it is but we'll have to bargain to get him to work for us," Wen Xiao sighed. "Prickly tree," she mumbled. "But I can't go since I just returned from the White Tower. He'll be suspicious if I head back there again."

Then she turned her gaze towards Zhuo Yichen. Even Fan Ying followed her gaze. Zhuo Yichen glanced up, noticing their silence and staring.

"Why are you looking at me?" Zhuo Yichen stepped away from them. "I'm not going to bargain with a yāo to help us. I'm never going to work with them after what they've done."

Wen Xiao looked pitiful at him for a moment and he looked away from her. "Not all yāos are evil, Xiao Zhuo."

"But they kill without feeling anything. They are nothing but creatures who don't understand basic human emotions."

"They do," she said. "They do understand but up to a certain level. Please, Xiao Zhuo. He will help us."

"How sure are you he won't just turn around and kill all of us? Maybe he's tricking you."

"He wont because it involves my safety too. He has an agreement with the Baize Goddess to keep me safe. He can't go against the agreement, lest he'll suffer from it. He'll definitely agree to help us."

Zhuo Yichen studied Wen Xiao's expression before relenting. He can never fight with her and his shoulders dropped with a loud sigh.

"Fine. How do I find him? What kind of yāo is he?" Zhuo Yichen asked and Wen Xiao smiled widely at him.

"Zhuo daren," Fan Ying suddenly spoke, reminding the two about his presence. "Be careful about negotiating. He'll need a Baize Token if he agrees to help to cross over to Tiandu. Without the Baize token, it'll be trouble if humans saw him."

"Oh, he won't be needing the Baize Token," Wen Xiao said and both men looked at her with wide eyes. "He's a Great Yāo and holds half the Baize Goddess' token with him."

"That's—" Fan Ying's eyes widened when he suddenly remembered a certain yāo that came, carrying Zhu Yan in his arms. "Him?"

"Father, did you meet him before?" Wen Xiao blinked at Fan Ying and the older beta man nodded with a sigh. "He never told me he met you."

"He didn't but it is complicated."

"Wen Xiao, where can I find him?" Zhuo Yichen asked and Wen Xiao grinned.

"He might be at the Dianmu Divine Tree or at Huaijing Valley. Your best choice would be Dianmu Divine Tree at the White Tower."

Zhuo Yichen nodded. He's going to make an impromptu trip to Dà Huāng it seems. He left when he was ready. He followed Wen Xiao's instructions, crossing roads and climbing up a certain path until he found Mount Kunlun.

The winter breeze reminded him of Frost Pavilion. Zhu Yan's room never had much warmth to begin with.

He frowned to himself, shaking the thought of Zhu Yan from his mind and trudged through the heavy snow. Bells rang when he walked past the hanging bridge. Just hearing the bells, reminding him of the hair bells his brother used to tie in his hair. Zhuo Yichen climbed up the stairs when a little blur came heading towards him.

"Ying Lei, you little brat!" An elderly man hurried ran after the little blur. "Come back here."

The blur suddenly turned and crashed into Zhuo Yichen's legs causing him to fall as well. They tumbled to the snow with loud groans. Zhuo Yichen wanted to grumble loudly and scold the little blur. But he held his tongue, blinking his eyes open.

He felt something touching his cheek. He glanced up slightly and found a little face, probably older than ten years-old, staring down at him with wide golden eyes.

The child's hair was a mixture of light brown, black and golden, reminding Zhuo Yichen of a tiger. The child moved away from him when he saw Zhuo Yichen awake. Zhuo Yichen sat up, feeling snow powder fall from his shoulders and the child continued to stare at him with wide eyes.

"Who are you?" The child asked but yelped when his ear was suddenly pulled and twisted. "Yèye, it hurts!"

"It's supposed to hurt, you little brat," the elderly man grumbled before noticing Zhuo Yichen. "Oh, young man, what are you doing here?" He asked curiously.

Yún Guāng Sword's crystal glowed a light blue and everyone glanced down at it in surprise. Zhuo Yichen immediately tensed. His eyes darted between the two people in front of him in wary.

Ying Lei quickly shuffled to stand behind his grandfather, clinging onto his dark blue robes. The elderly man looked unfazed, as if he had seen many things in his old life and Zhuo Yichen wondered if he was a yāo.

"So the Yún Guāng Sword did choose a master in the end," the elderly man said.

"Who are you?" Zhuo Yichen asked, standing up and holding Yún Guāng Sword's hilt tightly as a way to ground himself before attacking.

"I'm Ying Zhao."

Zhuo Yichen's eyes widened for a moment. He's heard of the name. Wen Xiao mentioned he was a Mountain God living in Mount Kunlun, guarding the passage between Dà Huāng and Tiandu. Zhuo Yichen quickly scrambled to bow in respect, knowing better than to anger a god.

"Forgive this one's rudeness," he said and heard an amused chuckle.

He felt weathered old hands touch his arms, gently urging him up. He slowly stood up to see Ying Zhao smiling kindly at him.

"You remind me of someone," he said, looking down at the sword. "Who once wield that particular sword. Are you also looking for someone?" He asked knowingly and Zhuo Yichen could only nod.

Ying Zhao chuckled. "Who are you looking for?"

"A Great Yāo," Zhuo Yichen answered and Ying Zhao hummed, petting Ying Lei on the head. "That holds half the Baize Token."

"Ah, him," Ying Zhao said, nodding. "He should be at the White Tower."

Zhuo Yichen bowed in thanks, hefting his bag up higher but paused in confusion. Ying Zhao smiled knowingly. He gently pushed Ying Lei forward.

"Take him to the White Tower," Ying Zhao told Ying Lei and the little child nodded his head.

He grinned at Zhuo Yichen and skipped forward, waving at the human alpha to follow him. Zhuo Yichen sighed through his nose and followed Ying Lei. They didn't talk throughout the short journey. Ying Lei brought him to the border between Dà Huāng and Mount Kunlun.

"I can only go this far from here," Ying Lei said, pointing to the tall white tower in front of them. "Li Lun should be there."

Then he scampered off, like a little tiger cub.

Zhuo Yichen glared at the tall tower, glowing with a bright light and huffed. He's doing this for Wen Xiao, he told himself. He headed down to the entrance of the White Tower finding it empty. No one greeted him. His instincts went on high alert, and he took cautious steps until he entered the White Tower.

He stood in awe at the White Tower's interior. A pool of water circled around where he stood and koi fishes lazily swam around. Mist floated above the water, giving it a mysterious aura. Zhuo Yichen could feel yāo energy coming from the waters.

He followed the steps, taking in the white smooth walls with thick white roots that curled and hung low against the walls. Its roots felt old, probably ancient. He wondered what kind of tree it was but didn't stop to idle.

He kept going until he scented a scent that felt familiar and vague. It was the same scent that used to cling onto his brother's robes whenever he returns from his missions.

Pagoda flowers and fresh earth.

He felt like he was back in the garden of his home. The magnolia tree that grew in the centre and how he used to play around it. It also reminded him of his mother's garden. He brushed the memory away and continued forward until he stood at the top.

His gaze fell upon the figure standing in front of a large tree. A tree with twisted gnarled branches and roots, in colour of deep black and brown, with gold ley lines pulsing through the tree's bark. He suspected the tree was the Dianmu Divine Tree as Wen Xiao mentioned.

The figure was dressed in black and dark blue clothes like a tree painted with the night sky as its background. Gold hair beads hung from the figure's hair. It brought a reminder of Zhu Yan wearing those same gold hair beads.

The figure heard him or even sensed him. They slowly lifted their head up. Zhuo Yichen tensed, gripping onto Yún Guāng Sword's hilt tightly when the crystal light up. An only indication that the person is a yāo. Zhuo Yichen quickly threw a shield spell in the nick of time to block a spell of dark blue and gold yāo energy.

“Oh?” the figure said, putting his hand down and Zhuo Yichen dropped the blue shield. “Yún Guāng Sword has chosen its wielder.” 

Zhuo Yichen glared at him. This must be the Great Yāo both Wen Xiao and Ying Zhao mentioned. The yāo stood tall with dark willow shaped eyes staring at him. Dark wisps of hair hung in front of the yao's sharp face. If it was on different circumstances, Zhuo Yichen would have found the yāo to be handsome even, maybe on par with Zhu Yan's beauty.

Zhuo Yichen narrowed his eyes further. He dismissed the thought, growling to himself for thinking astray.

Yún Guāng pulsed with power, giving Zhuo Yichen a hint of its feeling. He twirled the sword in his hand and glanced at it. He felt the ache of his brother who wield it.

It never chose his brother as the owner. If it did, his brother would still be alive. Zhuo Yichen felt Zhuo Yixuan was a better choice, someone who could lead and handle situations like these easily. Better than him.

Zhuo Yichen looked up at the pagoda tree yāo with a burning look in his eyes.

“You seemed very familiar with it." Zhuo Yichen pointed out. "What do you know of it?” he asked, narrowing his eyes even more.

A scoff came from the pagoda tree yāo. Zhuo Yichen bristled with anger.

“I knew the previous wielder couldn’t awaken it. It seems like it chose you and there's only one explanation. You must be a Zhuo then.” The pagoda tree yāo continued to stare but something in his gaze looked melancholic.

It surprised Zhuo Yichen for a moment that his brother knew this yāo. But he kept his emotions at bay not wanting to give it away.

“You knew my brother?” he asked.

“Zhuo Yixuan,” the pagoda tree yāo said.

Zhuo Yichen couldn't contain the flinch. He felt tears burned in his eyes at the mention of his brother's name.

It was always been a very sore spot for him. He loved his brother dearly and it tore him apart when his brother died.

The yāo continued. “Was your brother. He was–” 

“Killed by Zhu Yan,” Zhuo Yichen hissed, feeling angry all of a sudden. Because of Zhu Yan, my whole family is dead.

"Isn't it?" Zhu Yan's voice purred in his ears. "The misery you felt and endured. The hatred that festers in you. Zhuo Yichen, you can kill this Great Yāo in front of you and show him who's more powerful."

Shut up, Zhuo Yichen screamed at his own mind. He ignored Zhu Yan's chuckle and his ghostly touch disappeared.

“Then why are you here?” the pagoda tree yāo said, withholding himself back from snapping at Zhuo Yichen. “What’s your point of coming here? To show me that you're the new owner of Yún Guāng?"

Zhuo Yichen took a deep breath through his nose. Wen Xiao was right. He really has to bargain to get the yāo to agree.

Time for him to pull the ultimate card. Wen Xiao's little mischief is rubbing off on him.

“Wen Xiao told me I could find you for help,” he said, noticing the pagoda tree yāo raising an eyebrow. “There’s a tricky case I need help in solving.” 

“And why do you need my help? Surely someone as esteemed as you from the Zhuo family can solve the case," the yāo said. "The pesky human is offering help when she shouldn’t," he mumbled.

“She said you would say that too.” Zhuo Yichen saw the disgruntled look on the yāo's face. Wen Xiao must have terrorised the yāo during her childhood.

“She said you'll help since it involves her too," he pushed on.

The yāo sighed loudly as if resigned to whatever Wen Xiao's disaster luck has caused.

“What has she done now?” The pagoda tree yāo grumbled.

“A case that involves a yāo who might potentially harm her. We need the help of a Great Yāo to clear this case and you’re the only Great Yāo that can help us.” 

“Potentially?" The pagoda tree yāo frowned. "And what do I gain from helping someone like you?” 

This is where Zhuo Yichen has to thread lightly. He's making assumptions based on his brother's words. He has to gauge if he would make it out of here alive or not.

"The whereabouts of your mate," he bravely said.

Zhuo Yichen knew he hit the mark when the yāo suddenly narrowed his eyes.

“The whereabouts of my mate?” the yāo growled in warning.

Zhuo Yichen held his gaze without flinching. “I can tell you where your mate might be but that's if you help us.”

“And if I refuse?” 

“Wen Xiao said you won't refuse because it involves your mate's well being.” 

“You’re playing with fire, little Zhuo. You and Wen Xiao. What’s your name?” 

“Why should I tell you my name, yāo?” 

"Fortunately, Wen Xiao has a habit of telling me everything and I know some things about you, Xiao Zhuo Yichen.” The yāo took a step forward and Zhuo Yichen tensed.

He clicked his tongue, glaring at the yāo.

“Do we have a deal or not?" Zhuo Yichen snarled. "I can do this mission alone even without your help.” 

“Stubborn like your brother. I’ll help you since that pesky human is involved. You both better listen to what I say or I’ll snap your neck if you annoy me."

“Wen Xiao said you would threaten me,” Zhuo Yichen mumbled but the yāo heard it, judging from his scoff. “Fine.” Zhuo Yichen agreed as well.

He's going to hate this case a lot and judging from the yāo's loud sigh, he is too. Zhuo Yichen turned around ready to leave again when the yāo flicked his hand.

A vine snapped out, wrapping itself around Zhuo Yichen's hand and pulled him over. He reacted harshly, throwing a punch and a twirling kick at the yāo who dodged it with a side step.

"We are going to take a shortcut," the yāo said.

Zhuo Yichen was pulled hard and collided against a strong chest. His whole vision was covered in a swirl of pagoda leaves.

The sudden pull and change of scenery made Zhuo Yichen lurched forward. It felt like someone was pulling on his hair, tugging him along like the children that used to bully him. He landed on his hands and knees, gagging hard. Someone called his name but he couldn't hear over the loud ringing in his ears.

He swallowed hard, willing the nausea away. He felt a cool touch to the back of his neck. It comforted him for a moment. Someone was holding his hair back and he gagged again.

"Li Lun, you know you aren't supposed to do that to a human!" Wen Xiao's voice started to filter through the ringing and Zhuo Yichen took slow breaths to calm his racing heart and rolling stomach.

"It was faster than going through the longer route," Li Lun commented. "He'll be fine."

Zhuo Yichen felt like running his sword through the yāo's hard chest.

"Fine would be an understatement," Wen Xiao argued.

"Zhuo Yixuan was fine when I did it." Li Lun grumbled and noticed Zhuo Yichen pushing himself up.

"That was different—Xiao Zhuo, are you okay?" Wen Xiao asked, gently rubbing Zhuo Yichen's back when he felt his stomach settle and the room stopped spinning.

"Fine…" Zhuo Yichen grumbled and a small piece of ginger candy was given to him.

He gratefully took it from Wen Xiao's hand and bit into it. Zhuo Yichen looked up to see Li Lun studying him.

The pagoda tree yāo looked away when their eyes met. Li Lun examined the state of the house. He started to slowly stroll through the main path to enter the Zhuo mansion. Zhuo Yichen slowly stood up, breathing deep and slowly until Li Lun turned to face them with a blank look in his eyes.

"What kind of case is this, pesky human?" Li Lun asked and Wen Xiao rolled her eyes.

"A yāo had taken a village as its territory and killed most of the villagers. They killed our comrades…" she said with tears suddenly filling her eyes and her bottom lip wobbled.

Death was never easy for Wen Xiao. She could never get used to the sight of death after witnessing her own father killed in front of her.

A brush of a finger underneath her eye made her glanced up to find Li Lun wiping her tears away. Zhuo Yichen watched the silent exchange, feeling he was witnessing something he shouldn't have.

He felt his heart twisted at the sight. The easy relationship Wen Xiao had with Li Lun reminded him of his relationship with Zhu Yan before it was broken.

It was the same.

Zhu Yan was tender in his actions, brushing Zhuo Yichen's tears away and comforting him when he needed comfort. Li Lun stepped away once Wen Xiao's breathing had even and she sniffled loudly.

"Anything else?" Li Lun asked, turning his gaze towards Zhuo Yichen instead. "Surely there's more than just killing your comrades."

"Their hearts and limbs were taken," Zhuo Yichen answered, standing tall with a glare. "We've received reports of silk threads hanging from the tree branches."

"Silk threads?" Li Lun murmured to himself, thinking before he sighed. "Sounds like you're dealing with a Zhizhujing."

Wen Xiao's eyes widened and Zhuo Yichen looked stunned.

"A Zhizhujing? This far out? She's not supposed to be here," Wen Xiao said and Li Lun hummed.

"She crossed over without a token." Li Lun continued to stare at them, as if waiting for something.

It sounded off, like Li Lun knew. Zhuo Yichen narrowed his eyes, pulling Yún Guāng Sword out and pointed it towards Li Lun. Wen Xiao hissed his name but he ignored her. The same willow shaped eyes stared at him unflinchingly with the blade tip resting just slightly underneath Li Lun's chin.

"You knew, didn't you?" Zhuo Yichen growled. "You knew a Zhizhujing was in Tiandu but you did nothing to stop it."

"So what if I didn't do anything?" Li Lun questioned. "Would it have made a difference if I did something?"

"Innocent lives are gone. A yāo is still a yāo. Killing without any remorse." Zhuo Yichen's anger was felt through the tone of his voice and the way he tightened his grip.

Anger filtered through Li Lun's eyes. He knocked Yún Guāng Sword tip away from his neck with a single finger. He lunged forward, grabbing Zhuo Yichen's throat with a tight grip. Li Lun pulled Zhuo Yichen close until they were nose to nose.

"Li Lun!" Wen Xiao cried out. "Stop, don't hurt him!"

"Killing without remorse?" Li Lun snarled. "Typical of a human who would say it. Your kind is just the same. You've killed yāos without any remorse as well when we have done nothing to you, yet you take away innocent lives too! Zhuo Yichen, you're just the same as well. A human is still a human."

"Enough!" Wen Xiao screamed. "Let him go, Li Lun."

Li Lun tightened his grip on Zhuo Yichen's throat. "I can break his neck right now," Li Lun grinned, eyes blazing with a knowing look and his scent thickened with a hint of blood lust in it. "What's the point of keeping him around when all he does is question me?"

Zhuo Yichen clawed at Li Lun's arm. He couldn't breathe. The grip tightened further as he struggled.

No, I can't die here! He screamed at himself. He lifted a leg up and kicked hard against Li Lun's chest. It sent the pagoda tree yāo reeling back, releasing his neck.

Zhuo Yichen dropped and rolled to the side, coughing harshly. He sucked in air greedily. There was a small ache on his throat, knowing it will bruise later on.

"You're the same as Zhu Yan," Zhuo Yichen wheezed. "Killing people just for fun."

Li Lun's eyes flashed a green gold glow. "And it's because of you humans that I can never see him again!" He roared.

Zhu Yan's name slipped from Li Lun's lips but Zhuo Yichen wasn't paying attention to hear it. Li Lun lunged at Zhuo Yichen with a twirling kick.

Zhuo Yichen caught Li Lun's leg with a blue shield protecting him. He flipped Li Lun off and twirled around to avoid getting hit again. Li Lun leaped at him with vines and roots shooting out, ready to pierce Zhuo Yichen when Wen Xiao suddenly stepped in front of him.

"Wen Xiao!" Zhuo Yichen cried out.

Li Lun immediately pulled the vines and roots back. A cloud of white powder burst in Li Lun's face. He swayed on the spot before falling to down to one knee. He coughed hard and glared weakly at Wen Xiao like she had betrayed him.

"Pesky…human…" he stuttered before collapsing to the side.

Wen Xiao poked Li Lun's foot, finding him unconscious and she sighed loudly.

"It won't hold him off for long but it will do for now to calm him down," Wen Xiao said, turning to Zhuo Yichen. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine …" Zhuo Yichen answered, staring at Li Lun's unconscious form. "What did you do?"

"Huanling powder," Wen Xiao said. "It's used to capture yāos. It's easier to subdue the weaker yāos with it but not for the stronger ones. It'll give us a couple of minutes before he wakes up."

"You made it?"

Wen Xiao nodded. "Li Lun has been my test subject for a while. I still haven't perfected the measurements for a Great Yāo."

"Will he still help us?" Zhuo Yichen rubbed at his throat when Li Lun slowly woke up.

The pagoda tree yāo pushed himself up with a grumble, glaring at Wen Xiao.

"Throw that powder at me one more time and I'll toss you into the white lake," he threatened and Wen Xiao glared at him in return.

"If you didn't harm Xiao Zhuo, I wouldn't resort to using it on you," she argued. "You better help me with this case."

"No," Li Lun grunted, glancing at Zhuo Yichen with a hard gaze. "One pesky human is enough and now there's two of you."

Wen Xiao smiled at Li Lun. She hooked her arm around his and pulled him down to her mouth. Whatever she whispered to Li Lun, the pagoda tree yāo was pulled away, leaving Zhuo Yichen alone. He sighed loudly, straightening his robes and decided he needed to sleep.

Maybe he should take the whole day off instead.

"I'm tired," he grumbled, heading to his room .

~~~~~~

"How do we capture a Zhizhujing?" Wen Xiao asked, walking in between Zhuo Yichen and Li Lun. She doesn't trust them to be civil or to not lunge at each other like hissing cats. "Do we even know where it is?"

"Zhizhujing's will hide in caves mostly," Li Lun answered. "She'll pick a place that is more secluded and away from the main houses and roads."

"So a big abandoned house that no one wants others to see and find."

"Or a house that is half covered in silk threads," Zhuo Yichen pointed out.

They found the house wrapped in silk threads in a very obvious sign that a yāo lives here. It looked eerie with silk threads hanging from the tree branches and large cocoons hanging down.

Zhuo Yichen felt the cocoons weren't just for decorations. The shape of it was slightly humanoid.

The Zhizhujing was bold, displaying their web out in the open for all to see. Zhuo Yichen thought it was a form of aggression display but he doesn't know much about Zhizhujing's personality or anything.

Li Lun touched the silk threads hanging beside him. He rubbed at the sticky thread before flicking his hand to get rid of it.

"It's fresh. She hasn't been here for long then," Li Lun stated when he sensed something.

He grabbed Wen Xiao's arm, halting her from moving further.

Yún Guāng's crystal suddenly glowed blue and the whole sword lit up with a low hum. A sign that a yāo was closed by. Zhuo Yichen was immediately on alert.

“Is Zhizhujing powerful?” Wen Xiao whispered. 

“It depends whether she has fed or not,” Li Lun implied, slowly scanning the area. “Do not leave my side.”

He felt Wen Xiao grip his sleeve. She always did that when she was scared. He glanced once at Zhuo Yichen, making sure he was on alert too.

Zhuo Yichen scanned the area with an intense gaze. He guided Yún Guāng Sword, making it like a detector for them. It would alert him by glowing brighter or humming loudly. No yāos could escape from Yún Guāng's detection.

Li Lun found the technique to be very useful. The crystal glowed brightly when Zhuo Yichen tipped it upwards. He looked up. 

The Zhizhujing leaped out from the branches with her arms outstretched and claws ready to harm him. He leaped back while Li Lun pulled Wen Xiao away, bringing her to a safer spot. Zhuo Yichen blocked the next attack from the Zhizhujing. She hissed at him and he saw her yāo marks on display. 

Web like patterns adorned her forehead. Her eyes were a bright purple colour, unusual for a human but natural for a yāo. Her black hair was tied in a loose bun with a hairpin pinning it. Her robes were in the colours of black and purple with the edges torn and frayed, giving it a textured feel as if webs were hanging. She leaped away from him, staring at Yún Guāng Sword and snarled.

“Yún Guāng blade,” she muttered and her eyes darted up at Zhuo Yichen. “You?” 

Zhuo Yichen glared at her without saying a word. He threw a short blast of spell and she dodged it with a wave of her hand. Webs shot out to protect herself.

Zhuo Yichen placed his palm on the sharp sides of the sword and drew blood. He coated the blade with his blood, a technique he accidentally discovered.

Yún Guāng Sword hummed loudly, brimming with life and Zhuo Yichen swung the blade in an upright arc. Zhizhujing dodged the attack but she couldn't dodge the thick vines hurling towards her. It snagged on her arms. She shrieked at the roots wrapping itself around her ankles and trapped her on the spot.

Zhuo Yichen spun with his sword thrusted out. He pierced Zhizhujing's shoulder deeply. She cried out in pain as more vines started to wrap around her. She struggled against her binds but the blade dug deeper into her shoulder.

Zhuo Yichen pulled Yún Guāng Sword out before levelling it on parallel to his eyes. He took a deep steady breath and drove the blade straight into her chest. 

She spluttered, blood dripping from the corner of her mouth. Zhuo Yichen and Yún Guāng worked together and he sent a deep pulse of magic through the sword. He knew this would destroy Zhizhujing's inner core, killing her instantly.

He pulled Yún Guāng Sword out and she gasped in pain. She fell to her knees when Li Lun released his vines and roots off her. Her body started to disintegrate into fine dust in gold and purple. Zhuo Yichen took a step back, watching her wither and die. He felt the fight was too easy. 

Like the Zhizhujing wasn't putting any effort in fighting at all. It couldn't be that easily to subdued her with Li Lun working with them.

“Jiejie! No!” Someone screamed.

Zhuo Yichen turned around, finding another Zhizhujing running towards them. She was dressed in loose robes. The tail ends fluttering behind her until Zhuo Yichen saw the swell of her abdomen.

His eyes briefly widened and the memory of Zhu Yan gentle caressing his own swell of his pregnant belly. The memory fractured and stuttered, causing cracks like a broken mirror of Zhu Yan cradling the underside of his pregnant belly, blood staining his clothes and a silent scream fell from Zhu Yan's lips. 

Zhuo Yichen quickly moved back, blinking his eyes hard to get rid of the memory. The pregnant Zhizhujing landed on her knees, grabbing hold of her dying sister's hand. 

“Jiejie, no, please,” she begged and her sister smiled at her. 

“Go…run…” her sister croaked. “Run…” 

“No jiejie. No. Don't leave me,” the Zhizhujing cried. “You promised we would look after the pup, A-jie.” 

“S-S-So-rr…y…” her sister brokenly said before her eyes slipped closed with the last trace of her hand disappearing from her sister's grip.

The Zhizhujing sobbed uncontrollably for the death of her sister. "Jiejie…" she brokenly wept.

Zhuo Yichen wondered if he should end her life or not. Li Lun walked over, stopping beside her. The Zhizhujing looked up with a hatred glare but her expression faltered when she saw Li Lun. 

“You…I…” she stuttered, knowing who he was.

Li Lun crouched in front of her, taking in her current state. “Why are you out here without a token, especially when you're like this?” 

The Zhizhujing looked away, biting her bottom lip hard to avoid answering until she felt the cold blade of Yún Guāng against the side of her neck. She followed the line of the sword, finding grey blue eyes glaring at her. 

“Why did you kill the villagers?” Zhuo Yichen asked. This is too easy. Something isn't right.

“Because…my child needs their father,” she said, letting her tears fall. 

“Father? A human?” Li Lun questioned her again and glanced at her pregnant belly. “The pup is half human then.” She nodded. “This is even messier," he clicked his tongue.

“What is?” Wen Xiao asked quietly, stepping out from her hiding spot. “She's pregnant. What's messy about it?” 

“Zhizhujings don't leave their partners alive." Li Lun stood up. “She's looking for the father so she can feed him to the pup but instead you and your sister ended up killing everyone in this village.” 

“I…” the Zhizhujing paused, unable to answer. 

“So you killed everyone to find the child’s father?” Zhuo Yichen asked, pressing the blade deeper and a soft whimper escaped from Zhizhujing's lips. “And fed everyone to your baby instead?”

“If I don't feed my baby, I'll die. My baby needs human blood in order to survive. What my baby is…a mistake on my end,” Zhizhujing explained. 

Her words seemed to pierce Zhuo Yichen’s heart, making him remember Zhu Yan's words of pups and mistakes. How his pup was a mistake till the miscarriage happened, leaving Zhu Yan in pain and smelling of grief. 

“Li Lun, what do we do? We can't kill her,” Wen Xiao softly asked.  

“She came here without permission and killed the villagers,” Zhuo Yichen answered. “She falls under Tiandu’s jurisdiction.” 

“Xiao Zhuo.” 

“But she still falls under the Baize jurisdictions also,” Li Lun cut in, glaring at Zhuo Yichen. “I'll take her back and let Zhao Wan’er deal with her.” 

Zhuo Yichen gritted his teeth. Wen Xiao looked at him pleadingly and he pulled Yún Guāng Sword away with a step back. Li Lun studied him, grabbing Zhizhujing's arm and hauling her up in a tight grip. He lifted his hand, summoning gold ropes wrapping around Zhizhujing. They left in a swirl of pagoda leaves and Zhuo Yichen felt angry and frustrated all of a sudden. 

“Xiao Zhuo…” Wen Xiao softly called to him, watching him take deep breaths to calm himself. 

Maybe it was the sight of the pregnant Zhizhujing that threw him off or maybe it brought unpleasant memories of Zhu Yan's pregnancy and how the omega yāo had a look of lost hope.

A baby wasn't a mistake unless the parents deemed it to be. He felt he understood the Zhizhujing unborn baby and turned away from the house. 

“Let's go home,” he said to Wen Xiao.

They walked away from the quietness of the village with a report ready to explain to the emperor. Zhuo Yichen would bury himself with practice to erase the sudden feeling of wanting to visit Zhu Yan.