Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Taehyung had a great life. He was living in a beautiful, big house and he had an amazing and loving husband who was earning so much that Taehyung didn’t have to work. Some might think that being     home all day would become boring, but Taehyung didn’t mind. He actually loved taking care of the house, doing chores and cooking and making sure everything was in order, because that was the least he could do for his husband that was providing for both of them. They didn’t have children, but they had a dog, small chihuahua, that was keeping Taehyung company and that he often cuddled with in the evening when his husband had to stay late at work.

He managed to do a lot today, he did laundry, from putting it in the washing machine and drier, folding it and ironing what had to be ironed. He also cleaned both bathrooms in the house and he even managed to bake muffins and cook a nice dinner and he finished just when he heard his husband’s car pulling up on the driveway.

“Good evening, honey, how was your day?” he greeted with a wide smile when, few minutes later, his husband came to the kitchen that was next to their spacious living and dining room.

“Evening, darling,” his husband returned the smile and came to him, pecking his lips in greeting before he answered the question: “I had few exhausting meetings, but I am good now that I am with you.”

“You are always so cheesy,” Taehyung chuckled.

“And you love it.”

“I do,” he admitted.

“What are we having today?” his husband wondered, peeking over Taehyung’s shoulder to see what he prepared for tonight.

“Well, I usually cook Korean since we both like it, but you know I like switching it up sometimes, so I made pasta.”

“Oh, is it Carbonara? You know how much I love it!”

“You know it is,” Taehyung chuckled at his husband’s enthusiasm: “It is ready, I will just put it on plates, you go wash your hands and change from the working clothes.”

“You are so bossy,” his husband laughed, but he left the kitchen to do what Taehyung told him.

Taehyung smiled to himself. He really loved his life and he loved his husband. There was a five-year age gap between them, Taehyung was younger, but he didn’t mind, it was never an issue, they were getting along really well ever since they met. They have been married for two years now after two years of dating and Taehyung couldn’t truly be happier. He felt so blessed because his husband was always so good to him, they never fought, they were never mean to each other, they had that kind of relationship that everyone dreamt of. And on top of that, his husband was also very handsome, tall and strong and with a pretty face, and if that wasn’t already enough to make everyone envious, he was also great in bed.

Taehyung snapped from his daydreaming when he heard his husband come back downstairs since he went to their bedroom to change and so he grabbed the plates and carried them from the kitchen to the table that was right across from it. He already prepared something to drink, water and white wine, since they liked to open a bottle every now and then with their meals and finish it while watching a movie.

That was the case also that evening, they ate and then snuggled on the sofa in the living room and watched a romantic drama that Taehyung chose.

They concluded the night with slow and sensual love making in their bed before they fell asleep and just before it happened, Taehyung thought that it was yet another perfect day.

*

Everything was amazing, Taehyung had no reasons to complain about his life, and he thought he couldn’t be happier, but then something started happening, something very strange that made him feel guilty.

He started having strange dreams that he didn’t understand at all. It all started one night when his husband had to stay at work all night, so he went to bed alone and maybe that was the reason for the strange dream he had, maybe he was just missing his husband lying next to him.

He felt like he couldn’t breathe even when he gasped and tried to take in a deep breath. He nearly started to panic, but then he realized that he couldn’t breathe properly because his face was buried in a soft pillow.

He had no idea what made him gasp so suddenly, but then it happened again and he felt his fingers gripping silky bedsheets that were under him.

It was like his brain was too slow to know what was happening and it was slowly becoming clear. He felt heat at the pit of his stomach and then he felt something pushing so deep inside of him that it felt like it was reaching his core.

He raised his head and let out another gasp that was accompanied by involuntary moan and that was when he fully realized that there was something warm and firm inside his ass, moving in and out and stroking his sensitive walls.

He moaned again when he finally understood what was happening, it wasn’t anything unfamiliar, and for a moment he thought that his husband came back home and they started making love, but he was too tired and passed out for a while. But he didn’t remember it happening and even though his mind felt clouded, he could somehow tell that the cock that was moving inside him now wasn’t his husbands. It was different, it was bigger and thicker and it was pressing so impossibly deep and it was teasing his prostate incessantly.

He let out a whine that sounded foreign to his ears, he didn’t know that he was capable of making such a sound, it sounded so desperate and needy and he realized that his body felt like that too, it felt like it was on fire and he wanted to burn.

He suddenly felt a strong arm wrapping around his waist and his backside was raised and pressed against a pelvis and he dropped his head back on the pillow on his forehead, fingers gripping the soft bedsheets tighter when he felt a short shake wreak through his body.

His head started spinning when he suddenly felt warm, sturdy chest press against his back and then he felt a warm breath on his ear. He shivered and that feeling got stronger when he felt soft lips caressing his earlobe before a quiet, breathy voice said: “You are so needy today, baby.”

Taehyung felt a strange sensation run through him, not from the words, but from the voice that spoke them. It felt familiar yet foreign at the same time and he had no idea what to make of it. He was somehow sure that didn’t know this man that was continuing to fuck him from behind in just the perfect tempo, but at the same time he had this strange feeling that he knew him.

“Please, don’t stop,” he got out in a whimper before he could stop himself. It was like the words came out on their own accord without him really wanting to say them, like his brain just decided for him what to say, but when he felt the man starting to grind deeply into him, he couldn’t bring himself to care, because it just felt so good.

“I wouldn’t dream of it, angel,” the soft voice replied in his ear and Taehyung felt a pang in his chest upon hearing the pet name. Something about it just pulled at his heartstrings so hard it almost hurt.

“God, you feel so good, baby,” the man groaned and it was one of the most erotic sounds Taehyung’s ever heard.

“Please,” he whimpered again, not even sure what he was begging for, he just knew that he didn’t want the feelings that were running through him to stop.

He let out a loud moan and his body tensed when he felt a hand wrapping around his heavily hard cock that was hanging between his legs and just when it started stroking the shaft, the man behind him sped up until he was fucking him quickly and with purpose.

The orgasm that washed over Taehyung was powerful, his whole body was shaking and he was moaning and whining like he never has before and all that felt even more powerful when he heard that soft voice whisper praises in his ear.

He gasped when he felt the cock stopped moving inside him and then he felt something warm and sticky flooding him and that’s when he realized the man wasn’t wearing any condom.

Taehyung wanted to turn around so badly and take a look at the man, but he felt so pleasantly exhausted like his body was made of jelly. So he just closed his eyes, feeling small, dope smile playing on his lips.

Taehyung woke up with a gasp and it took him nearly a minute to recognize his surroundings and know that he was in his house and his bedroom and his bed. His husband’s side of the bed was still empty, which told him it must be the middle of the night.

His heart was pounding in his chest and he was breathing heavily as if he really just reached an orgasm.

But then he realized it didn’t happen just in his dreams, when he moved, he felt wetness in his pants and he grimaced when he realized that the front was stained with drying come.

For a moment he panicked and thought that it wasn’t a dream, but that it really happened, so he was expecting to feel lube and come in his ass, but it was completely dry and also tight, which was an indication that he didn’t just have sex.

He got up and headed to the bathroom, taking off the dirty pyjamas and washing his dick and then face.

He looked at himself in the mirror, unable to believe that he just had a wet dream, because that hasn’t happened since he was a teenager whose body was raging with hormones. And he knew that he shouldn’t feel guilty because he couldn’t control what he was dreaming about, but he couldn’t help it. He had an amazing husband that was giving him everything he wanted and needed and more, so it just seemed unfair for Taehyung to cheat on him even in his head.

But when he lay back in the bed in clean pyjamas few minutes later, he couldn’t shake off the strange feeling that the dream brought. It felt so powerful and so real, it felt like it really happened, maybe not in this life but another, and…part of him really wanted to dream about that man again and find out who he was.

*

He thought that the strange erotic dream was just a one-time thing, but he started having similar strange dreams. It wasn’t every night, but once in few days, usually when his husband was sleeping next to him, he went to the dreamland where the stranger was.

Most of the dreams were consisting of sex or kissing, there were never normal situations when he’d talk to the man from the dream and every time he tried to open his eyes or turn around and see the man, he woke up as if his brain didn’t want him to see the stranger.

But then one night he had a dream that was different from the others.

He was standing in some kind of laboratory, there were no windows and there was lots of furniture made from stainless steel. There were also some devices, most of them electronic, but he had no idea what their function was. It looked like he was in some kind of office where someone was creating these devices.

When he looked down, he noticed that he was standing in front of a table and his hands were holding components of a device that was lying there. Was he the one making those devices?

His hands started moving as if they knew what they were doing, it was like his brain wasn’t giving orders for him to work, it was just happening automatically as if he was in someone else’s body and not his own, as if he was just a silent observer trapped in a body of someone who clearly knew what they were doing.

He heard some noise behind him but he didn’t turn around as if he was too immersed in the activity and he was startled a little when suddenly two arms wrapped around his waist and a firm body pressed against his back. He had no idea how, but he knew it was the stranger that kept appearing in his dreams.

“Baby, don’t you think it is time to go home?” the soft voice that has become familiar asked quietly.

“I’m working on something,” Taehyung replied but it felt like those weren’t his words, once again, it felt like he just said it automatically.

“I can see that, but it is very late.”

“What time is it?”

“It’s nearly eleven, you have been here for fifteen hours. Did you even take a break to eat something?”

“I had a sandwich,” Taehyung replied. He didn’t remember eating a sandwich though, it must have happened before he got here in this body that he wasn’t even sure belonged to him.

“You should eat properly,” the man reprimanded him softly: “You have to take care of yourself, angel, I know you are very passionate about your work, but you won’t be able to do your job if you are gonna be exhausted and hungry.”

“I am fine, baby, really, don’t worry,” Taehyung replied with a chuckle in his voice. It wasn’t the first time he has called the stranger with a pet name in his dreams, but it always sounded so strange. It also sounded strange when the man called him pet names, which he has noticed was happening a lot, it felt strange because he liked it, it always made him feel warm on the inside.

“All I’m saying is that I barely get to see my husband these days, it hasn’t been that long since we returned from our honeymoon,” the stranger said.

Honeymoon? Husband? Taehyung was shocked by the revelation, eyes instinctively slipping to his hands and really, he saw a golden band on his finger that he hasn’t noticed before. Has it always been there in all his dreams or was this the first time?

“You work a lot too, you have nothing to blame me for, Mr. agent,” Taehyung replied again without consciously wanting to say it. Mr. agent? Was that some nickname or was it a position?

“I don’t blame you for anything, but I think it is time to go home, mm?”

“I guess I can finish it tomorrow,” Taehyung sighed, putting down the parts of the unfinished device and bringing hands to his eyes and rubbing them, realizing just how tired he actually felt and that his…husband was actually right, he was exhausted and hungry.

“We can stop for a take-out, it is not healthy to eat this late, but it is better than to go in bed with an empty stomach, I haven’t eaten anything for hours either,” the man suggested.

“That sounds great, let’s go,” Taehyung smiled and started turning around.

He held his breath, wondering if he was going to wake up again like usually but he was turning and turning and nothing was happening, so he became hopeful and his heart actually started beating faster in anticipation. Was he finally going to see the face of the man that has been appearing in his dreams for the past three weeks or so?

He ended up facing the man, but he instantly looked away due to the bright, white light that suddenly blinded him. He looked back at the stranger through his fingers, eyes watering, but instead of seeing a face, he only saw a bright light enveloping the man’s head, making it impossible to make out any features.

“Why is this happening?” he mumbled to himself.

“Come on, aren’t you gonna give me a kiss?” the man asked and Taehyung felt a hand on the small of his back pushing him closer to the other, but the light started getting brighter and he realized that the man’s voice sounded strangely far away.

The white light got almost unbearably bright and it enveloped the stranger and then the rest of the room and then also Taehyung.

And he woke up with a small gasp in his bed, with his husband lightly snoring next to him. He had no idea what just happened and what the bright light was since that hasn’t happened before. It was like something or someone was preventing him from seeing the man, but he didn’t understand why. He’s had countless dreams in his life, but his brain never tried to prevent him from seeing something or someone, so why was it happening now?

*

Taehyung continued living his life, which pretty much consisted of taking care of the house and his husband when he came home from work. He loved doing it, he was glad that he had free time and didn’t have to go to work like many other people, he was truly privileged that his husband was earning so much for them to live more than comfortably.

But the strange dreams continued and they were more frequent too, sometimes he had one when he was just taking an afternoon nap of the sofa in the living room and the more dreams he was having, the more questions he had, not only about the dreams and the strange man that was appearing in them and whose face he still hasn’t seen, but there were also new questions about his real life. But it was like something was forcing him not to think too much about his life because it seemed like every time he was awake and started having certain doubts, something distracted him and he forgot all about his previous thoughts.

The dreams he was having were of all kinds. Sometimes he had straight up wet dreams and he felt ashamed to admit it, but the sex he was having in those dreams was great. It felt like the man he was sleeping with knew exactly what to do and where to touch or kiss or push to make him come apart. But he also had dreams that were more romantic and some felt just random.

He remembered one dream where he was lying on a blanket on a field with beautiful view of mountains and forests and he was snuggled to the stranger. They weren’t even talking, they were just lying there and the man kissed the top of his head from time to time and Taehyung felt so good that he refused to try to look at him because he knew that if he did, the man would disappear in the bright white light as always. But he wanted to know his face and his name so badly, it was like somewhere deep down he knew answer to those questions, but they were slipping right through his fingers and he couldn’t grasp them.

Another dream that he remembered was when he was in a car, sitting in the passenger seat, looking out of the window at the illuminated streets of a big city while the car was filled with a soft music coming from the radio. He refused to look at the driver out of fear of waking up, so he just continued staring out of the window, smiling to himself when he heard the man singing quietly to the song. His voice was so nice and comforting, it was wrapping around Taehyung like the fluffiest blanket and he never wanted it to end.

He eventually always woke up, of course, always in his bad and next to his husband, sometimes with their dog snuggled to his side and it usually didn’t take long for the alarm to go off and wake his husband up for work. He usually got up and went to prepare breakfast and some lunch for his other half since that was the least he could do for him.

One day he was watching TV after lunch that he ate alone as usually. He felt pleasantly sleepy after the meal and before he knew it, he fell asleep and was teleported to the now familiar dreamland.

He was standing in a small kitchenette that looked too sterile to be part of any house and even though he has never been there, he figured that it was probably a kitchen attached to the laboratory in which he has appeared few times before. He was making himself a tea.

“Taehyung-ah, are you here?” someone suddenly called. That voice was unfamiliar, Taehyung knew it wasn’t the usual stranger with whom he has been spending weeks in his slumber, but somewhere inside on instinct he knew that this person was his colleague.

“In the kitchen, hyung!” he called back and as always, it felt like those words didn’t come out of his mouth.

“Did you finish the thing for me? I don’t wanna pressure you, but I really need to move on with my project.”

“It’s on the main worktable!”

“Oh, okay, found it!” the man yelled back: “You’re the best, Taehyung-ah, what would we do without you?”

“Lots of our great discoveries and missions wouldn’t be completed without me,” Taehyung replied back with a chuckle.

“That is very true,” the colleague replied: “Hey, did you hear? The new guy is here, Namjoonie is just giving him the tour of the building, I think they will come here soon too.”

“Oh, the new agent? Did you see him?”

“Just briefly, he’s young and inexperienced, but Namjoonie said that he looks very promising. And he doesn’t look bad either, he is pretty handsome and he is close to your age.”

“Hyung, I told you to stop hooking me up with people,” Taehyung retorted with mixture of annoyed and amused tone in the voice.

“I am trying to hook you up with people because you barely leave this lab, how else are you supposed to meet someone? I just want you to be happy, you know that,” the other man replied from the other room just when the electric kettle finally turned off and Taehyung grabbed it to pour the boiling water in the prepared mug with a teabag.

“I know, hyung, but I highly doubt that I am gonna fall in love at first sight with some random new agent,” Taehyung scoffed, taking the mug to go to the lab.

He was actually surprised when he saw a tall, handsome man standing there in white lab coat. What shocked him was the fact that he could actually see his face, although it seemed strangely blurry as if he suddenly needed glasses. He could still make out some features, he could tell that the man was very handsome, almost impossibly so, and he was smiling widely.

He didn’t know how, but he had this strange feeling that he knew the man. It was like he knew him in his past life or something.

The door to the lab suddenly opened and another man walked in. It was the same, his face was a little blurry, but Taehyung had a feeling like he knew him, not just shallowly as in seeing him somewhere before, he felt like he knew both of these men quite well, it felt like…they might have been his friends.

“Hi, Taehyung-ah, sorry to interrupt you, I know you don’t like it when you work, I just brought the newest addition to our team to look around so he knows where everything is,” the man that walked in said as he walked into the room and then stepped aside.

Taehyung’s heart started beating faster, which told him instantly who this new addition was and sure enough, he saw someone walk in but as always, his face was impossible to see due to the bright white light.

He was still staring as if he could see the man or some part of him could and he felt something squeezing at his chest. It was so strange and so powerful and he wished he could finally see that stranger that he was thinking about even when he was awake.

“Taehyung-ah, this is the new agent that is joining us,” the tall man that came with the stranger said: “Meet Jeon Jeongguk.”

“Jeon Jeongguk,” Taehyung got out in barely a whisper, heart speeding up even more as if that information was the most important thing. And it was important because for the first time since he started having those strange dreams, he heard the man’s name.

“It is nice to meet you, Dr. Kim, I have read a lot about the work you do for the company,” the man, Jeongguk, said and stepped closer and for a brief moment, Taehyung could suddenly see his face. It was just a flash, it lasted only a second, but he saw the glimpse of two big, dark eyes, nose, lips, sharp eyebrows and black hair. But before he could even properly store it in his memory, it was gone and the light started getting brighter and that meant only one thing.

He opened his eyes, for a moment blinded by the light from the TV since he left it turned on before he fell asleep.

He felt breathless as if he was running for a long time without a break, which was strange of course, since he never even got up from the sofa.

He turned to his back and stared at the ceiling and there were only two words on repeat in his mind over and over again.

Jeon Jeongguk.

After weeks of having those strange dreams, he finally knew the name of the man and it sounded so, so familiar, even though he was sure that he has never seen him before. But what about those two other people? That was the first time he saw anyone else than Jeongguk, and in their case, he was even able to see their faces, not well, but at least a little and he was absolutely sure that he knew them.

The dreams have been incredibly confusing already, but this one was probably the strangest one yet.

He has already figured out that the random scenes or wet dreams that he’s had weren’t in any chronological order, it was like they were just random glimpses of what he thought might be his past life or something. As crazy as it sounded, it was one of the possible explanations because he refused to believe that they were just normal dreams because they definitely weren’t. It wasn’t normal for anyone to dream of just one particular person all the time, dreams were usually much more random than that.

One of the reasons why he knew that the dreams weren’t chronological was that he started paying attention to his hands. He always glanced at them and sometimes he saw that there was the golden ring and sometimes there wasn’t, so he was convinced that some of those dreams must be from the time before the wedding and some were from after.

Today’s dream was special, not only because he got the glimpse of the man’s face and learned his name or because there were two other men as well. It was special because, somehow, he knew that this was the first time he met Jeon Jeongguk and their love story evolved from there.

Chapter Text

The dreams continued, some were very confusing, others were quite clear. But what started to concern Taehyung was that he actually started looking forward to those dreams. He didn’t understand why, he had a great husband and a nice house and he had a great life, so he was confused why being in a dreamland with a stranger was so intriguing. It was like something was pulling him to Jeongguk and he wanted to learn more about him, he wanted to see his face and figure out why he was dreaming about him almost every day.

It felt like he was going crazy, he had all kinds of theories about those dreams, some were straight up insane, some were more plausible, like the one that he was just trying to escape the reality. He didn’t know why he would want to escape it though.

A small blessing quite literally came to his door one day.

He just made himself an afternoon coffee when the doorbell rang. He was confused because he usually didn’t have any visitors, but he was too curious to not find out, so he went to see who it was.

“Jiminie!” he gasped with wide eyes, staring at his best friend.

“Taehyung-ah,” the other grinned widely.

“What are you doing here?” Taehyung got out, genuinely shocked to see the elder, even though his visits weren’t uncommon. They didn’t happen very often, but Jimin was basically his only friend who stopped by sometimes.

“Well, we haven’t seen each other in a while so I figured I might come and see how you are doing,” Jimin shrugged: “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, of course!” Taehyung nodded and stepped aside to let Jimin inside. He told him to go sit on the sofa while he went to the kitchen to make him coffee and put some cookies that he baked yesterday on a plate so they had something to snack on.

“You always come unannounced, would it kill you to let me know in advance?” Taehyung reprimanded his friend when he finally sat down next to him. He wasn’t really upset, of course not, he was happy to see his friend, it was actually what he might just need.

“You know me, I like surprises,” the slightly older man grinned: “So how are you doing? Is everything okay around here?”

“Oh yeah, everything’s great, my husband is great, the dog is great…”

“Why do I have a feeling that there is something troubling you?” Jimin eyed him suspiciously. It was like a gift he had, he could always tell when there was something on Taehyung’s mind that he really needed to talk about.

Taehyung wasn’t sure he wanted to talk about it though. He loved Jimin and he trusted him, but everything about his strange dreams was just crazy, he was worried that he would sound like a complete lunatic.

“You know you can tell me anything, Taehyung-ah, I am not gonna judge you,” Jimin said softly as if he could read Taehyung’s mind.

“I don’t know…it is probably nothing…” Taehyung sighed.

“If it bothers you then it is not nothing.”

“If I tell you, you might think that I am crazy.”

“Aren’t we all?” Jimin laughed: “Come on, I promise that I won’t judge you.”

Taehyung bit his lip. He would never talk about the dreams with his husband, how could he when he was essentially cheating on him in those dreams? But this was Jimin, his best friend who was really good at listening and also at giving advice. Taehyung always felt lighter after his visits.

“It’s just…I have been having these weird dreams lately,” he started slowly, gathering his thoughts and trying to figure out what to tell Jimin, if he should just tell him everything or if he should omit some things.

“We all have weird dreams sometimes.”

“But I have them all the time, it started slowly and randomly, but now I have them almost every time I sleep.”

“When did it start?”

“Weeks ago, I don’t really remember.”

“Alright, and what are those dreams about? Are they nightmares or something?” Jimin wondered, trying to help his friend.

“No, not nightmares, but I have never heard of such thing. What is strange about them is that I keep dreaming about the same person over and over again,” Taehyung revealed.

“So you are having the same dream every night?”

“No, they are different dreams, but this man keeps appearing in all of them,” Taehyung explained and then he proceeded to tell Jimin pretty much everything. He told him about the man and about the things they were doing together in those dreams, he told him about being unable to see him, he told him about the strange white light and how he always woke up when he tried to see what Jeongguk looked like. He knew he probably really sounded insane, but he felt also relieved that he could finally talk about it with somebody.

“Jeongguk, you say?” Jimin asked with raised eyebrow: “You know his name?”

“I only learned it recently in one of those dreams,” Taehyung nodded: “What do you think it might all mean?”

“Honestly, Tae, I don’t know,” Jimin said with a sympathetic smile: “You said that in most of those dreams, you are on some kind of a date or you have sex, or it’s just some nice little moments, right?”

“Yes.”

“I think you don’t need a shrink to analyse you then, I think that maybe…you feel lonely, so your mind has created this guy because you might feel like your marriage isn’t that great.”

“But my marriage is great! My husband is amazing and we have sex that I enjoy!” Taehyung protested.

“Alright, but maybe you are missing romance. Do you even have date nights?”

“Well, he usually comes from work and we have dinner and then watch TV or something…”

“That is not enough though, is it?” Jimin pointed out: “You don’t even need to go out, but spending more time together and talking more might help. How about spending an evening without TV? How about taking a nice bath or something?”

“I mean…when you put it like that, it is true that we are lacking some romance,” Taehyung admitted. What Jimin was saying made sense, but there were still may questions about the dreams that he wanted explanation for, so he went off: “I can see why I’d have dreams about romance and sex, let’s assume that really is the case. But what about all those other things?”

“What other things?”

“Wouldn’t it be normal to keep seeing more people rather than just one guy?”

“How do you know it is the same guy when you have never seen his face.”

“His voice is the same,” Taehyung explained: “And I just know, I can’t explain how, but even when I don’t see him, I just somehow…feel him.”

“Maybe your brain just thinks he is the man of your dreams, literally,” Jimin chuckled.

“Even if that was true, why am I not able to see him, huh?” Taehyung continued. Now that he told Jimin everything, he didn’t want to let the opportunity to properly talk about it slip through his fingers. He had lots of questions and now he could finally say them out loud and hope that Jimin might give him some advice or at least some insight.

“It is not completely unusual to not see faces in dreams, Tae, it is not unusual for them to be blurry. I read somewhere that everyone you see in your dream is someone that you have seen before, sometimes it can be just some stranger you saw on a street and whose face your brain remembers, because brain isn’t able to come up with someone just like that, it needs model to base the people in our dreams on.”

“I know, I have heard that somewhere before, but what’s up with that strange light? It just feels like my brain or something else is preventing me from seeing him and then I am forced to wake up.”

“Why do you even want to see him so badly?”

“Well, isn’t that normal to want to know what the guy that I am dating or married to in my dreams looks like? I am just curious and it is getting stronger and stronger, it is so strange, sometimes I feel almost desperate,” Taehyung revealed.

“I think that you are overthinking it,” Jimin sighed and gave his friend a small, sympathetic smile: “You are at home almost all the time, you are alone most of your days and you are probably missing romance with your husband like we concluded earlier. They are just dreams, Taehyung-ah, this is your real life, don’t get too lost in your head, it might be dangerous.”

“You are probably right,” Taehyung sighed but then he added another thing that has been on his mind for a long time, it was one of his crazy theories about the dreams and even though he knew Jimin was probably going to laugh at him, he needed to say it. He took a deep breath and said with serious expression: “I just can’t shake off this feeling that those dreams feel like they might be from one of my past lives or that…they are old memories of a life I lived before.”

“Tae, that is just ridiculous,” Jimin scoffed: “You didn’t live any life before this one, maybe there are past lives that we all lived, but we don’t remember them.”

“You are right,” Taehyung mumbled, looking away. He should have known that Jimin wouldn’t take his theories seriously, but somehow he had a feeling…it was like with everything he said today, Jimin was trying to convince him that those dreams had no deeper meanings. Was his friend just trying to help him, or was he trying to convince him that nothing strange was going on here?

Well, ironically, it just made Taehyung more paranoid and more convinced that something strange was really going on. But what was it and why would Jimin be part of it?

*

Maybe two months after Taehyung started having those strange dreams a real breakthrough happened.

At first, he tried to follow Jimin’s advice and spend more romantic time with his husband, and it was nice, but the dreams didn’t go away. And he was more and more convinced that his brain was trying to tell him something, maybe he was just getting paranoid, but he started having this strange feeling that there was something seriously shady going on, not just with the dreams but with his real life too.

For example, he noticed that his days were very repetitive. Sure, that wasn’t a very strange thing, especially since he didn’t have a job and was a stay-at-home husband, but he started paying more attention to his actions and realized that it felt like there was really weird pattern to them. He seemed to be doing most things in exactly the same way and at exactly the same time without even realizing it. Was it possible for anyone to have such perfect biological clock to start cooking lunch at exactly eleven thirty? Or was his brain somehow programmed, even though that thought was completely crazy?

The breakthrough happened one evening. He was lying in the bed next to his lightly snoring husband. They made love and it was great, but just like with almost everything lately, Taehyung realized that even their sex life was very repetitive. They were changing only few positions, they never got into anything exciting or new, it felt good but it was always the same. Perhaps that was a normal thing though, lots of married couples had sex like that, right? But considering there were other things that Taehyung has noticed were strange about his life, he was convinced that this wasn’t a coincidence.

It took him a while to fall asleep since his mind was too occupied with all kinds of thoughts, but after some time, he finally started feeling sleepy and boneless and it didn’t take long for him to get transported into the dreamland.

He opened his eyes, noticing he was in a bed in spacious yet somehow still cosy room. There was a big window letting in sunlight and it was opened so warm, summer breeze was getting in.

He has been in this room before so it wasn’t completely unfamiliar, it was this room where lots of the sex escapades were happening, but this time around, he was completely alone.

He heard noises in the apartment coming from some other room and he was too curious to continue lying, even though he felt really comfortable.

He got up, noticing that he was naked, but he spotted a silky robe so he grabbed it and wrapped it around himself, walking out of the room barefoot.

The details of the hallway were slightly blurry, but he didn’t care about them so he paid it no mind. He walked in what he presumed was a living room, but it was blurry too so he couldn’t really make out any details.

When he turned his attention to the kitchen though he saw it clearly. It was connected to the living room, separated from it by an island, but what really caught his attention was the man standing with his back to him at the stove, presumably making breakfast.

He couldn’t smell anything even though he heard sizzing of meat or eggs or something, but he wasn’t really surprised since some senses were suppressed in dreams. He paid it no mind though because his vision was focused and he realized that for the first time, he could clearly see Jeongguk’s body. He couldn’t see all of it because he was wearing a t-shirt, but he didn’t have any pants, he only had black boxer briefs on, but it gave Taehyung good opportunity to see his long, strong legs.

What caught his attention and what he never noticed before was that one of his arms looked darker than the other and for a moment, Taehyung thought that there was something wrong with it, but then he realized what it was – Jeongguk had a tattoo sleeve. He couldn’t make out any shapes and pictures though, it was like his brain couldn’t truly register, or perhaps, remember them, so for that reason he couldn’t really see them.

He could also see the back of Jeongguk’s head with no bright light enveloping it, but it wasn’t useful since he wasn’t facing him. All he could see was black hair cut quite short, but that didn’t tell him much.

“Oh, you’re up,” Jeongguk said over his shoulder, glancing shortly at him but it was so quick that Taehyung couldn’t see his features: “I wanted to bring you breakfast in bed, you’ve ruined it.”

“Mm, breakfast in bed? What’s the occasion?” Taehyung asked, just like usually without really wanting to say it, so he knew that his other self must have said that.

“I don’t know, maybe because I am happy that you agreed to marry me last night?” Jeongguk chuckled.

Taehyung glanced at his hands, seeing a ring there, but it was a different one than what he was used to seeing. This one wasn’t golden, this one was silver and there was a small diamond on it, so there was no doubt that this was an engagement ring and based on what Jeongguk said, they got engaged last night.

“It is not real,” Taehyung said with a sigh, more to himself than anyone else: “This is just a dream, we didn’t get engaged because I am already married to someone else and now I am sleeping.”

He looked up at the other’s back, feeling strange sadness settling in his chest and for that reason, it took him a minute to register what just happened. He realized that he just spoke for real, it was him and not his dream self, those were truly his thoughts and this was the first time he voiced them.

“You are not real, are you?” he asked louder, looking at Jeongguk. Small part of him was hoping that he would react to his question which would tell him that he could understand and that they could actually communicate, but Jeongguk continued cooking as if nothing happened.

“You can’t hear me, can you?” he asked again with joyless chuckle: “I am just talking to myself here because you are doing your thing and you have no idea that none of this is real.”

“Baby, you don’t need to wait here, just go wash up,” Jeongguk said, confirming what Taehyung just said. He had no idea what Taehyung just told him because that wasn’t part of the original script or whatever it was.

“You were too lazy to take a shower last night and I wiped you a little, but I know you hate being dirty,” Jeongguk added with a teasing chuckle: “And you sure are dirty after what we did all night long, so go take a shower and don’t worry, the breakfast is not ready yet so take your time.”

“But I don’t want to leave you,” Taehyung said, unsure if it was him speaking or his other self, but something was telling him that this was him, it felt like he had more control over his mind and body than in his previous dreams.

And he decided to use that opportunity and act and do whatever he wanted so he took few steps forward until he was standing right behind Jeongguk and then he wrapped his arms around his waist and hugged him. It was a strange feeling though, he couldn’t really feel his body and the warmth he knew it was surely emitting and he realized that it was probably because the dream Taehyung, at this moment, was gone to take the shower, while he decided to do this. But he couldn’t feel Jeongguk and Jeongguk couldn’t feel him because this wasn’t supposed to happen.

“I don’t know why you keep coming back and why I see you every night. I just know that leaving you is becoming harder and harder and that I want to really talk to you. I want answers, because I know that something weird is going on here. Can you please talk to me? Can you feel me and realize that I am really here?” he asked, voice sounding desperate even to his own ears, but weeks of these dreams were slowly driving him crazy. He had his life in real world, but he has realized that he started to really look forward to going to sleep and being with Jeongguk.

But he didn’t reply. He just continued cooking like Taehyung wasn’t there and Taehyung was sure that he would soon wake up, because he has broken the pattern of the dreams and started talking. And sure enough, he noticed that the room started being swallowed by the bright white light, so he just closed his eyes and tried to enjoy this moment for as long as he could before he would wake up in bed next to his real husband.

*

“So this is your apartment?” Taehyung looked around a rather small space that was consisting of a sofa with TV, kitchen and small table. There was a small bathroom with a door from a tiny entry hall and through the door next to the sofa he could see a bedroom.

He was in the familiar dreamland and just like most of the times, he was talking automatically as if his brain knew what to say, as if he’s said this before and he was just reciting a script.

“Yeah, I warned you that it was nothing fancy,” Jeongguk replied behind him.

“It’s nice, cosy and clean, maybe a bit too clean,” Taehyung teased.

“I might not look like it, but I am a pretty tidy person.”

“I just thought that a special agent could afford a bigger place.”

“Well, I haven’t worked in our company for too long, I suppose I don’t earn as much as the renowned doctor Kim,” Jeongguk chuckled as he watched Taehyung walk around and getting to know his place. He was glad he was doing it, because he was hoping to have him over much more often.

“I suppose I do earn more than you, you have to work for it,” Taehyung said.

“I just don’t see a reason to have a big apartment when I live here alone, you know? Sure, in the future, when I earn more and when I have someone to live with, I would want to move to a bigger place.”

“Would you?”

“Yeah, I always wanted a nice and light apartment or a house, maybe with a dog or two and maybe children as well.”

“You are full of surprises, who would have thought you are a family man?” Taehyung smiled, feeling warmth spreading inside his chest, because what Jeongguk just described was something he’s always wanted as well.

He had no idea how he knew this, but he somehow knew that right now they were in an early stage of their relationship. First, there wasn’t any ring on his finger, and he gathered from their conversation so far that this was the first time he has been to Jeongguk’s place and the first time that he learned what the agent wanted from life.

He wanted to look at Jeongguk so badly, he wanted to see what he looked like and he wanted to see especially what he looked like when he smiled or laughed. Whenever he did so, Taehyung could feel the warmth radiating from him, he was sure that his smile was beautiful and contagious. But he knew that as soon as he’d look at the other, he would disappear as always.

“Make yourself comfortable, turn on the TV if you want, I am gonna cook us dinner like I promised,” Jeongguk said as he went to the kitchen.

“You were bragging about being a good cook, so I am curious to see if that’s true,” Taehyung grinned as he sat on the sofa.

“I have to make an impression if I want to woo you.”

“Oh, you want to woo me?”

“Of course, I do, this is our fourth date, baby, I have to step up my game and make sure you want more,” Jeongguk chuckled lightly. That answered Taehyung’s previous thoughts, they were at the beginning of their relationship now, it was one of their first dates and he already knew the outcome. There were going to be many more until Jeongguk proposed to him and then they were going to get married.

He didn’t wake up, but it felt like there was some strange time jump. He didn’t remember much of the date, he didn’t remember Jeongguk cooking and then them eating. The next thing he knew, they were lying in a bed with half their clothes discarded on the floor and they were kissing quite heatedly.

“We can slow down,” Jeongguk panted as he started kissing his neck, making Taehyung let out a small gasp of pleasure: “We don’t have to do this and go all the way tonight.”

“We are not some young teens, Jeongguk, we don’t have to wait,” Taehyung replied, closing his eyes when the other moved to kiss him on the lips again.

“I know, and believe me, you have no idea how much I want you,” Jeongguk whispered against his lips: “But I want to do this right, I like you, Taehyung, you are not just some hookup to me.”

“I feel the same way,” Taehyung reassured him, moaning when Jeongguk lowered his hips and their hard cock rubbed together. He had a hard time speaking, but he did and added breathlessly: “I want this, I want you, so show me what you’ve got, Jeongguk-ssi.”

“Oh, I will, I will make you feel so good, darling,” Jeongguk promised.

Taehyung knew that this was their first time, not only because it made sense since this was just their fourth date, but he felt it. He felt that they were about to become one for the first time and even though he’s had lots of wet dreams about Jeongguk in the past weeks and knew that he was, in fact, very skilled, he was giddy to feel them being together for the first time.

It was just as beautiful as he imagined it would be. Jeongguk was a giver, he was pampering him, kissing and touching everywhere he could, telling Taehyung to let him do the work and make him feel good. So Taehyung did, he lay there with closed eyes and let the other do anything he pleased.

When they connected for the first time, it was just beautiful. He felt outburst of emotions in his chest, he felt like he has never before or after. He felt like at that moment he knew that Jeongguk was the one. He made love to him, slowly and sensually and Taehyung felt so loved and cared for it made him want to cry.

A while later, they changed positions from Jeongguk lying on top of him and it was Taehyung on top now while Jeongguk was lying on his back.

Taehyung’s hands were back on Jeongguk’s thighs, supporting himself as he rocked his hips back and forth. His back was arched and head thrown back so he was facing the ceiling but his eyes were closed anyway and he was just enjoying the sensation of feeling Jeongguk’s cock deep inside him.

“God, baby, you look so fucking sexy like this,” Jeongguk groaned and his voice sounded thick with want.

“Yeah?” Taehyung moaned: “You like watching me like this, riding your cock?”

“Hell yeah, it is already one of my most favourite things in the world,” the other chuckled breathlessly and moaned when Taehyung clenched around him, but then he continued: “I hope to see you like this more often, whether it’s on top of me or under me.”

“Really?”

“I told you before, you are not just some hookup to me, I like you, Taehyung,” Jeongguk reassured him, gently caressing his hips: “Why don’t you look at me, baby?”

Taehyung opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, suddenly brought back from the state of mind he’s been in. He has been enjoying himself, not thinking about anything really, but now that moment was disrupted and he realized what was happening here. None of this was real, it was all just in his head and if he attempted to look at Jeongguk, he would disappear in that white light as always.

“I can’t,” he whispered, continuing to move his hips but only a little and much slower.

“Why not? Just look at me, silly, this is our first time, I want to remember what you looked like when I remember this moment in the future,” Jeongguk said and cupped his cheek and Taehyung felt his eyes stinging. He had no idea if he had a control over his body or if he was going to work on autopilot and he would eventually look. But it felt like he had control over his body and he shook his head reluctantly, refusing to look at the other.

“Taehyung, look at me,” Jeongguk insisted and his voice sounded more urgent and insisting now.

“I can’t,” Taehyung whimpered, feeling a single tear slide over his cheek: “I want to, I want to see you so much, but if I do it, you will disappear. You are not really here, you will disappear like all those times before and I want to enjoy this for as long as I can.”

“I won’t disappear, I am right here, baby,” the other replied and strangely, his voice sounded slightly different and clearer than ever before.

“You aren’t, you are just my dream, you are not real.”

“I am real and what we have is also real,” Jeongguk said and caressed Taehyung’s cheek: “Just trust me, baby, I won’t disappear this time, I am really here, so just look at me.”

There was something so strange about Jeongguk’s voice and the whole situation. And Taehyung realized what it was, he couldn’t be sure of course, but he was pretty positive that this conversation wasn’t part of any already written script. He doubted that they would talk like this during their first time and it has already happened that he managed to speak on his own as if he broke this character of Taehyung that he was playing in his dreams, but he realized that Jeongguk was responding to him as if he broke the character as well and was truly here.

“Please, angel, please, I have finally managed to get to you, but I am not sure how much time we have,” Jeongguk said urgently.

Taehyung had no idea what that meant, what did it mean that he finally managed to get to him? He was scared of waking up, but that was the worst thing that could happen, he thought, and he was too intrigued to not to look. If this time was somehow different than all the previous dreams, he wanted to know and he might get the answer to his questions, or at least one of them – he could finally see what the man that’s been appearing in his dreams for weeks looked like.

Jeongguk sat up and wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s waist, holding him close and Taehyung knew that if he just stopped staring at the ceiling and looked down, they would face each other.

“You promise that you won’t disappear like always?” he asked, feeling hopeless because it has happened too many times before.

“I promise I won’t, so come on, look at me, Taehyung.”

He took a deep breath and moved his head, but before he did, he squeezed his eyes shut. He could feel the ghost of Jeongguk’s face, their noses were almost touching and he could feel his warm breath too, it felt so real that it made him think for a second that this wasn’t just a dream. He wrapped his arms around Jeongguk’s neck, touching his warm skin and caressing it a little, feeling muscles under his palms, which wasn’t surprising because he knew that Jeongguk was fit.

“Come on, open your eyes for me, baby,” Jeongguk whispered and Taehyung couldn’t resist any longer.

He slowly let his eyelids part and at first his vision was slightly blurry, but the bright light he was expecting to see wasn’t there.

He felt his heart physically jump in his chest and his breath caught in his throat when he finally saw him. He was seeing the man of his dreams clearly, not like he saw Seokjin and Namjoon once in that one dream where their faces were blurry.

Jeongguk was here, looking at him, and he was real, realer than anything Taehyung’s has seen before.

He wasn’t surprised to see that the man was handsome, he knew he would be. His features were soft and sharp at the same time, his eyes were big and kind and there was a small smile on his lips that matched the kindness he has always heard in his voice.

There was a white light coming somewhere from behind Jeongguk so his head was kind of illuminated, but perhaps that helped Taehyung to see him so well and clearly.

He took a breath since he was holding it until now and then he moved one of his hands, gently touching Jeongguk’s cheek, noticing there was a small scar on it. He was mesmerized for reasons he didn’t understand, he didn’t know why he felt so emotional from seeing Jeongguk, why he felt suddenly filled with so much love and deep, sad longing. It was like his whole being was begging for Jeongguk, like it was begging to be with him, really be with him, and he had no idea what it meant.

“Hi,” he got out dumbly.

“Hi,” Jeongguk said and his lips stretched into much bigger smile and his eyes crinkled. He had a beautiful smile, like Taehyung imagined, it was that kind of smile that could pull anyone in, a smile that was filled with warmth and love and devotion.

“You are here,” Taehyung whispered.

“I am,” the other nodded, but then he got more serious: “I have been trying to reach you for a while, but until now I could do nothing but watch silently what was going on inside your head.”

“Watch me? I don’t understand, you have been here this whole time, you are my dream.”

“I am not just your dream.”

“I am sleeping now, I will wake up soon and be with my husband and you will disappear like you always do.”

“Your husband? You mean someone that isn’t me?” Jeongguk frowned.

“You are my husband only in dreams, and only sometimes, we are not husbands now.”

“Well, that is true but, Tae, baby, you need to know something…”

Taehyung frowned when the light behind Jeongguk started getting brighter and he saw the other’s lips move but he couldn’t hear anything.

“What is happening?” he asked confusedly.

“I am losing you, you are waking up,” Jeongguk said and looked at him with a gaze filled with pain, pain so big it made Taehyung shiver and he didn’t understand a thing. Jeongguk spoke quickly as if he knew they didn’t have much time: “I will get through to you again, I promise, I will come back and we will talk, you have to understand what is happening here, you have to remember.”

“Remember what?” Taehyung frowned, but the light was becoming more and more unbearable and soon it enveloped Jeongguk’s face so he couldn’t see it anymore. He wanted to stay, he had so many questions now, even more than before, but he couldn’t fight it. The light was just too bright for him to continue looking into it, so he looked away and closed his eyes.

And just like always, he woke up.

Chapter Text

Jeongguk took a deep breath and opened his eyes, blinking few times and looking around confusedly. That was a normal side effect, his brain had to get used to the rapid change of environment, but since he was in a familiar place in the lab, it wasn’t hard to adjust.

“Are you okay?” someone asked him and it sounded like from a big distance at first. This wasn’t his first rodeo though so he knew this was normal too and that soon he was going to see and hear everything clearly.

“I finally got to him,” he said, feeling how dry his mouth was so he reached for a glass of water that was resting on a table next to him. Another side effect.

He heard someone come to him and touch him, taking off the electrodes that were on his head and chest. The wires led to a machine that was glowing with light blue light, which was an indicator that he was plugged off.

“I should take your blood and run tests,” the same voice as before said and when he turned around, he finally saw the man in the white lab coat.

“I am fine, Jin-hyung,” he said and tried to get up from the chair he was sitting on, but his head started spinning and he collapsed back on it.

“Yeah, I can see that,” Seokjin said with sarcasm dripping from his voice: “You have been injecting yourself with that crap and plugging yourself to that machine for two weeks now, I have to make sure that everything is in order. Remember, this is a new technology and we don’t really know what it does.”

“Alright,” he sighed and rolled up the sleeve of his shirt and offered his arm to the elder, watching the syringe being placed to the inside of his elbow and red liquid gushing into it.

“I finally broke the barrier, hyung,” he said, looking up at the biochemist.

“What exactly happened?” another voice asked and when he looked to the door, he saw Namjoon that just walked in.

“Well, you know what I told you before,” Jeongguk said: “I kept seeing him reliving memories about us.”

“Yes, we have concluded that he is probably dreaming and his subconsciousness is showing him those images,” Namjoon nodded.

“It is pretty confusing, there is no chronology, they are coming randomly.”

“That is understandable,” Seokjin hummed: “Human brain is complex and random, it is not like playing a movie where the plot would happen in chronological order.”

“That doesn’t matter though, I adjust to it quite quickly when I recognize the memory,” Jeongguk said: “You know what I told you before, I was usually there as a spectator, it was like watching him and myself, kind of like an out-of-body experience.”

“Well, they are his memories, they already happened, you are only watching him relive them.”

“Yes, but he was reliving them at first too. Remember last week? He broke from the memories, he started talking to me, or well, that me from the memory.”

“His brain is probably very confused,” Namjoon said: “It is demanding answers, so it is slowly breaking through.”

“Yeah, but today I managed to really get to him,” Jeongguk revealed: “At first I was watching the memories like usually, it was one of our early dates. But then suddenly, it was like I was sucked in the body of my past self and I could talk to him.”

“You really talked to him?” Seokjin asked with wide eyes and there was hope in his eyes, same hope that Jeongguk felt now, because this was a big breakthrough.

“Yes, I was really speaking to him, not my past self,” the agent nodded: “And for the first time, he could really see me. I have no idea what has been happening, but anytime he tried to look at me in those memories, I lost him, he woke up. Not this time though, when I told him to look at me and told him that I was really there, he could see me.”

“Did you get to tell him what is happening? Or ask him?”

“No, it only lasted for a while and then I lost him again,” Jeongguk sighed, but then he added with more hope: “But it is a progress, that means I can get through to him again and help him get out.”

“We are still not really sure what exactly is going on, Jeongguk-ah,” Seokjin pointed out.

“Well, we have a theory that makes sense. It is safe to say that he is plugged to this device,” Jeongguk nodded towards the small box with the blue light: “He said that I am only his dream, that means those memories must be happening when he is sleeping, or when he thinks he sleeps. But what is happening when he is awake?”

“They hold him in a prison of his own mind,” Namjoon said: “That is our theory, he is living a different life, that is why he doesn’t remember you and why you are only part of his dreams when his brain is trying to make him remember.”

“I think I can get to him again, I have been making progress,” Jeongguk said confidently: “I have to tell him what is happening, I have to tell him that nothing of what he is living right now is real, I have to get him to wake up.”

“If they keep him plugged to this thing and injecting him with the serum, it will be hard. They are pretty much keeping him in a coma,” Seokjin argued.

“I am able to wake up on my own though.”

“Yes, because we only inject you with a small amount that has a short duration, but if they keep pumping that stuff inside him, it keeps him from waking up.”

“He can wake up though, he is stronger than you think,” Jeongguk said confidently: “I just have to get to him and push him, his mind is strong enough to overcome this, he is the smartest person I know.”

“No one is doubting his intelligence, Jeongguk-ah, but this is a new technology that we don’t know much about. He is the only person that really knows how it works, it is his invention, but he is not here to help,” Namjoon sighed.

“Does that mean I should just give up then?!” Jeongguk exclaimed and stood up without any trouble, his mind and body have finally adjusted to him being back in reality. He looked at Namjoon and then Seokjin and continued: “We are close, I can feel it, I have to continue because it’s been working. They have taken him nearly two months ago, should I just leave my husband and hope we will find him some other way?”

“You know that we are doing everything we can, almost everyone is on it, we have some intelligence that has given us some clues,” Namjoon reminded him.

“I know, hyung, but I really think that this is the key, this is the main component.”

“Even if he manages to wake up then what though?” Seokjin asked: “They are holding him god knows where, that is what everyone in this damn company has been trying to find out and without success.”

“We will eventually find him, but at the very least, if he wakes up, he won’t be under influence of that damn thing. You said it yourself, we don’t know much, this is a new technology, you just took my blood to run tests to make sure that everything was okay. What damage do you think it could do to him if he has been plugged to that thing and given that serum for weeks?” Jeongguk argued.

“I am just as worried about him as you are,” Seokjin retorted: “He is your husband, but he is my friend, you know? I want to find him just as much as you do.”

“I know, hyung,” Jeongguk sighed, calming down and rubbing his face. He just felt so exhausted, he has been barely sleeping ever since they kidnapped Taehyung and they were not close to find him at all, they didn’t even know who was behind it.

“We will find him,” Namjoon came to the agent and rubbed his back soothingly: “I know this has been really hard for you, we all want him back, but it is understandable that you are affected the most.”

“I have to find him, it was me who screwed up in the first place,” the younger mumbled.

“You should stop blaming yourself, there was nothing you could have done.”

“There was though, I could have fought harder!” Jeongguk retorted: “I was with him when it happened and I failed him, I just watched him get stuffed in that car. I am trained for this, I have been in worse actions, but I couldn’t stop my husband from being kidnapped?”

“You were alone and there were at least ten of them, like you said, not even our best agent would succeed to protect Tae,” Namjoon argued.

“I am your best agent though,” Jeongguk pointed out.

“Yes and that is why I am saying that you couldn’t have done anything.”

“I still have to find him, not just because I let him down but because he is my husband, I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to him.”

“We will find him and save him,” Namjoon said with strong voice and determined eyes and that alone made Jeongguk feel slightly better. Namjoon was his superior, he was the leader of their unit and Jeongguk respected him immensely, so when he gave him the reassurance, it really meant a lot.

“I have to keep doing this though, even if that doesn’t help find out where they hold him, it will bring him back in reality. Jin-hyung, you said it yourself that being plugged to this and being injected with that crap might be dangerous, we can’t just let him stay like that for months,” Jeongguk insisted.

“Do what you have to do, you have my permission,” Namjoon sighed eventually when he knew that there was no changing Jeongguk’s mind, he could be terribly stubborn, but he could relate because he too was stubborn when it came to the safety of people he loved. If what happened to Taehyung happened to Seokjin, he would react just like Jeongguk, he would want to find his husband.

“We will keep running the tests though, alright? I want to make sure there is no damage done to you,” Seokjin said.

“Okay, that sounds like a good compromise,” the agent nodded.

“But not just blood tests, we should do MRI and CT too, this technology influences the nervous system the most, that is not something that can be really examined with blood tests.”

“Whatever you want, hyung, we have everything we need right here, so when you say you wanna run some tests, I’ll do it. But in the meantime, I will continue trying to help Taehyung and get him out of whatever world they put him into.”

“I think you’ve had enough for today though, you should go home and get some rest,” Namjoon jumped in.

“But-“

“You are not gonna help him if you exhaust yourself to death, besides, there are other people that you are responsible for, not just your husband.”

“They have been asking for you,” Seokjin said with a sad smile: “You know that we don’t mind watching them, but we can’t replace you.”

Jeongguk felt a pang of guilt and pain in his chest.

“They need their dad, Jeongguk,” Seokjin stepped to him: “They are already super confused about what is going on, don’t make this even harder for them.”

“They need both of their dads,” Jeongguk spoke: “And that is exactly what I am doing here, I am trying to bring Taehyung back. I know that they don’t understand this just yet, but they will in the future, they will understand that I wasn’t there for them because I was trying to save Taehyung. I promised them I’d do it so if I fail, Taehyung is not gonna be the only one that I let down.”

“They are smart, they understand that you are doing whatever you can,” Seokjin reassured him: “But in the meantime, they need you, they already lost one father, don’t make them go through even more stress and miss you too.”

“You know you can come to our place anytime,” Namjoon patted his back: “You should come see them and show them that you haven’t forgotten about them.”

“Of course, I haven’t forgotten them,” Jeongguk frowned: “I am doing everything I can to find Taehyung, not just for me but for them as well.”

“We know that, but maybe they don’t, they are still too little to understand everything, so you should come see them and remind them that you are still here.”

“I will,” Jeongguk nodded: “But I am tired now, I should go get some rest.”

“Sure, do whatever you have to, resting is important, but they are your responsibility, I would argue that they are more important than anything, so get your head out of your ass and come visit them soon,” Seokjin said with a small glare and after that, he turned on his heel and left the lab.

“We will find Taehyung and you will bring him home and you will soon go back to normal,” Namjoon gave Jeongguk one last sympathetic smile and pat on the back before he followed his husband and left Jeongguk alone in Taehyung’s lab.

*

Jeongguk felt slightly nervous when he got out of his car on a driveway of a lovely house. It wasn’t far from his and Taehyung’s, it was still the same neighbourhood, but this was where Seokjin and Namjoon lived.

He was nervous, but he was also excited to see his children for the first time in nearly two weeks, he really missed them, but right now his main priority was to find Taehyung and bring him home, so he had to make this sacrifice.

“Jeongguk-ah, hi,” Seokjin smiled when he opened the door.

“Hi, hyung, Namjoonie-hyung is still at work?”

“Yeah, he went to that meeting with an informer, you know, he told you about this.”

“Yeah, the informer apparently has some news on Taehyung’s whereabouts. I wanted to go with him, but he didn’t let me,” Jeongguk grumbled as he walked inside.

“You know he doesn’t wanna involve you in this since it is personal to you and you might get emotional…”

“I only beat up one guy and that happened a month ago!”

“Yes, and Namjoonie still remembers it,” Seokjin chuckled.

“We have done much more questionable things in our work than beating up people,” Jeongguk pointed out.

The company they worked for was a private investigation and research agency, but it often worked with government on matters that the politicians didn’t want to be tied with. They were operating in a very grey area, often fighting criminals and investigating bribed judges and policemen. He and Namjoon were secret agents, Namjoon was the leader of the department. Seokjin and Taehyung, on the other hand, were working in the science department, Seokjin was a biochemist, while Taehyung was an engineer, always working on some useful gadgets. One of those technologies was the one Jeongguk was plugging himself to and that the people that kidnapped Taehyung were using against him.

“Still, he thinks this informer might actually be onto something, so he didn’t bring you with him to ensure everything went smoothly and diplomatically,” Seokjin argued.

“Whatever, let’s hope that this informer actually knows something and not like all those before him.”

“You didn’t come to talk about work though, we can do that in the company. You came to see Taemin and Jihyo.”

“Where are they?” Jeongguk looked around, realizing that the house was strangely quiet.

“They are in the backyard, playing with Chanyeol and Buddy,” Seokjin informed him and nodded his head towards the sliding door leading from the kitchen to the backyard.

“Of course they are, they love being outside,” Jeongguk smiled a little, not surprised that the twins were in the backyard with Namjoon’s and Seokjin’s son and their dog.

He’s always wanted children and Taehyung wanted them too and the best way for same sex couples to have them was through adoption. Sometime over three years ago, they adopted twins when they were just two months old, a beautiful girl and boy, and they were their everything.

It was strange to watch Taehyung reliving their memories, some of them seemed like a lifetime ago. He joined the company right after college, and he fell in love with Taehyung at first sight. It took him some time and getting to know Taehyung to finally ask him on a date, but when he finally did, it turned out that they were really made for each other.

They started dating nine years ago, got married after three years and then decided to start a family together and that’s how Taemin and Jihyo came into their lives.

Since Taehyung was kidnapped, Jeongguk was doing anything he could to find him, so he was spending most of his days and nights in the company. For the first few weeks, he was focusing on investigation and he and other agents went on few missions that turned out to be useless, until he got the idea of using Taehyung’s latest invention. He had no idea that the kidnappers were using it on Taehyung, he just thought that if he plugged himself to the machine, it would help him reach Taehyung’s mind and he’d find out where he was. Soon he found out though that Taehyung had no damn idea where he was or what was going on, he didn’t even remember him and the past nine years they’ve spent together.

Since he was unable to really take care of the twins, Seokjin and Namjoon offered to take them in and Jeongguk was really grateful for that. He felt guilty because he felt like he was neglecting them, but he firmly believed that the best thing he could do for them was to find their beloved papa for whom they have been asking all the time.

“They have no idea that you are coming, they will be so happy to see you,” Seokjin smiled.

Jeongguk looked outside, hesitating.

“I know you feel like you have failed them, you promised them to find Taehyung, but I am sure that they will understand when you explain that you are still working on it,” the scientist said as if he could read Jeongguk’s mind.

“I just hoped the last time I saw them that the next time I’d come here, Taehyung would be with me,” the younger sighed.

“I know, but like I told you before, they are already suffering because they miss Taehyung, don’t make them suffer more by removing yourself from them too.”

“You know I left them here with you because it is the best thing for them, I can’t really take care of them right now.”

“I know that and I understand, Jeongguk-ah, but they are still just toddlers, they don’t think like we do. They understand that Taehyung is gone, but they have no idea what is really going on here.”

“Do you think I am a shitty father for not coming earlier?” Jeongguk looked at Seokjin with regrets and pain in his eyes.

“No, that’s not what I think, I know that finding Taehyung is the best thing you can do for them because they will only truly be happy when you are all together. And I understand that coming to see them more often would be painful for you, because the more often you leave them, the more it hurts to say goodbye,” the elder said with a sympathetic smile: “But don’t worry, they are okay, they are asking for you and Taehyung, but they are mostly happy.”

“I am glad to hear that,” Jeongguk smiled and finally took a step towards the glass door. The closer he was to the backyard, the more longing he felt to see the twins and he was excited because that was going to happen in the next few seconds. He really missed them, he loved them more than anything in this world, so having to leave them really hurt him, but just like Seokjin said, the most important thing for him right now was to bring Taehyung home so their family could be complete. He had to make this short-term sacrifice if it meant they were reunited and happy in the long run.

He walked outside, it was beginning of summer and it was perfect temperature, not too hot yet but not cold either.

Before he even saw them, he heard them and their happy laughter ringing in his ears. That instantly made him feel much better, it was a like a cure for the heaviness he was feeling in his chest almost nonstop since that evening Taehyung was kidnapped. They were on a date together, the twins were home with Hoseok who was watching them, and they went out for a dinner. Even after years in a relationship, they still made sure to go on dates and take care of their relationship and maybe that was the reason why they still loved each other as much as they did years ago. They left the restaurant and went to their car to go home when they were ambushed by ten masked people. Jeongguk had an excellent training, so he was fighting them off, but it wasn’t enough. He still remembered Taehyung’s protests and his wide, scared eyes when they grabbed him and stuffed him in a car without a licence plate and drove away, leaving Jeongguk alone with couple of bruises and busted lip.

He was brought back from his thoughts by another round of loud laughs and he shook his head to focus. He was there to see his children, it was no time to think about his fuck ups and about the fact that his husband was god knows where.

He finally saw them, they were on a swing, playing some silly games together with Chanyeol while Labrador Buddy was running around them and occasionally barking.

They celebrated their third birthday just half a year ago and they were growing every day, Jeongguk swore that they have changed since the last time he saw them. They were both happy and loud children, Taemin was a bit timider than Jihyo, she was a real ball of energy, but they were both very lively and they were very smart too. Jeongguk always joked that they took their intelligence after Taehyung, to which his husband always responded that it was bullshit since they were adopted, but Jeongguk really thought that their papa’s brilliance was rubbing off on them.

“I see you are having lots of fun!” he finally spoke, loudly enough to break the sound barrier of their laughter.

“Daddy!” Taemin gasped as he was the first one to turn around and see him.

“Daddy!” Jihyo squealed and jumped down from the swing and they were both running to him.

He squatted down and spread his arms, nearly falling back as they ran into him and hugged him. They were holding onto him so tightly it made him ache, because it looked like they were scared to let go and that made him realize that they truly missed him and that realization just made him feel guiltier.

“Daddy, you are here!” Jihyo mumbled against his neck as he got up with them, each on one hip. They were quite heavy, but it was no problem for him, he was frequently working out since his job required it and he could lift up and carry Taehyung too, so two toddlers were no problem.

“I am sorry that I didn’t come sooner, I was very busy,” Jeongguk said as they pulled back from the hug and looked at him with eyes sparkling with happiness.

“It’s okay, daddy, you are here now,” Taemin said with a cheeky smile and Jeongguk was impressed. Children truly were remarkable, usually not holding grudges like adults did. He was sure that they have been upset that he hasn’t stopped by for so long, Seokjin told him that they were asking for him and Taehyung and that they were even crying sometimes, but it looked like the moment they saw him, that sadness completely disappeared.

“Uncle Seokjinnie told us that you work a lot,” Jihyo said, sounding like a small adult which was always endearing.

“Are you having fun here with uncles and Chanyeol and Buddy?”

“Yeah, uncle Seokjinnie is baking us cookies and pies almost every day!” the girl announced.

“I bet he does,” Jeongguk chuckled. Normally he wouldn’t be very happy about the twins eating baked sweets almost every day, but he could let it slide now since these were different circumstances and anything that made his babies happy was good.

“And the nanny Jia is nice too!” Taemin revealed. Jeongguk knew Jia, since both Namjoon and Seokjin worked, they had to have a babysitter, even though Seokjin was working less since he and Namjoon adopted Chanyeol around the same time he and Taehyung adopted the twins. The boy was older though, he was one year old when they took him home, so he was nearly a year older than Jihyo and Taemin.

Jeongguk sat on the ground in the grass and spread his legs so he had one child on each thigh, it felt so good to just hold them and see their pretty faces.

“Did you find papa, daddy?” Taemin asked with a little frown and wide and curious eyes and Jeongguk knew that now came the time he was going to break their little hearts. They missed Taehyung just as much as he did, so he wasn’t happy about bringing the bad news.

“I am still working on it,” he admitted since there was no point in lying: “I haven’t found him yet, but I will soon.”

“I miss papa,” Jihyo mumbled with a sad pout: “I miss his funny bedtime stories.”

“I know, me too, sweetheart,” Jeongguk smiled sadly. Bedtime stories were Taehyung’s speciality, he himself sometimes sang lullabies to the twins while Taehyung was there and listened, but the scientist was more into storytelling, always coming up with silly, funny stories that made the toddlers giggle. He was changing voices and doing silly faces and Jeongguk was always there, sometimes just standing in the doorway of the twins’ bedroom, listening with a stupid smile on his face. He missed Taehyung with his entire being, but these stupid little things were what he missed about him the most and he only realized how precious they were to him when he lost him.

“Will you bring him back, daddy?” Taemin asked hopefully.

“I am trying, everyday, you know that is why you have to stay with the uncles, it is because I don’t have time to be with you,” Jeongguk said heavily: “I miss you every day, but I really have to find papa, I know you are smart and you understand.”

“Yes, daddy,” Jihyo reassured him: “But when you find papa, we will all go home together, right?”

“Yes, I promise,” he reassured her: “I will find him soon and we will go home. You know what I was thinking? That when I finally find papa and we are all together, what if we got a dog?”

“A dog?” Jihyo gasped.

“Like Buddy?” Taemin grinned.

“Yes, just like Buddy, or some other dog, that doesn’t matter. Would you like that?”

“Yes!” the toddlers said in unison and started babbling about the promised dog. Jeongguk thought that anything that helped getting their minds off the current situation was good and he and Taehyung have been talking about getting a dog for a while now, so it wasn’t just an empty promise to distract them, it was just something for them to look forward to, it was a reward for them for being so patient.

He spent two hours with them, but then he had to leave. He wanted to go to the company and get himself plugged to the device again since he felt that he was so close to helping Taehyung. He knew that it wouldn’t help them find his husband, but at least it would bring Taehyung back from the state they were keeping him in, at least he would remember Jeongguk and their children.

It was hard to leave, when he said that he had to go, the twins started crying and begging him to not go. That was one of the reasons why he didn’t want to come see them very often, because goodbyes were hard and painful for all three of them. Seeing their little faces all sad and tortured was breaking his heart and he knew it was hard to console them afterwards, Seokjin and Namjoon always had a hard time putting them to sleep that day.

Seokjin finally managed to get the toddlers from Jeongguk, telling them to go wash up for dinner.

“Do you know where Namjoon is now, hyung?” Jeongguk asked when Seokjin went to see him off to the car.

“I don’t know, probably on his way home now.”

“Tell him to call me, please, I wanna know if he got some useful information from that informer, okay?”

“Of course, you know that he will always let you know when there is some breakthrough,” the elder nodded: “You are going to the lab?”

“I have to,” Jeongguk nodded.

“I don’t like you being plugged to that thing so often.”

“We’ve talked about this, hyung, I have to do this. We can run all the tests you want in few days to make sure that my brain hasn’t suffer any damage, okay?”

“Fine,” Seokjin sighed and said that he had to go back since leaving the three rascals alone inside wasn’t wise.

Jeongguk’s heart felt heavy as he watched the house disappearing in the rear-view mirror, he was glad that he got to see his babies for a while, but it was hard leaving them. He knew they were in good hands though and that was a great consolation, he knew that they had everything they might need in Seokjin’s and Namjoon’s house. Now he had to focus on the mission and keep his promise and get their papa back.

Chapter Text

Jeongguk sat in the chair and put the electrodes on his body and then grabbed a syringe filled with the special serum. One could not work without the other, the serum helped the brain to properly wire to the machine.

Jeongguk wasn’t unfamiliar with it, he was actually Taehyung’s guinea pig when he made the technology few months ago. It was a big breakthrough that could really change the world in many ways. It would obviously take years and years for it to be used in all kinds of everyday settings, but for starters, it could be easily used in military and special forces and agencies like theirs.

The technology allowed to basically programme anything into someone’s brain, it was little bit like dreaming, only much more complex and almost impossible to tell that what was happening in one’s head wasn’t real. It could help with fighting the crime, for example, if criminals were wired to the technology and they were put into a made-up world, it could help with investigation. It was truly an amazing technology, but like with most great technologies, the problem was that they could be quite easily misused. It already happened and ironically, it happened to the person that invented it.

Jeongguk couldn’t insert himself directly into the world that Taehyung was in since he didn’t have the programme and had no idea where the kidnappers put him. But since they had such strong emotional bond, he managed to somehow connect to Taehyung’s mind, although it didn’t work like he thought it would. He had a theory, he was sure that Taehyung started having those dreams of the memories before Jeongguk got to him, so when Jeongguk was searching for his husband, his subconsciousness somehow led him to the part of Taehyung’s brain that was trying to make the scientist remember his real self and the real life. So Jeongguk found himself in Taehyung’s dreams, but he could only watch everything without interfering. He was trying to scream at Taehyung in hopes of being heard, he tried to get into his old self from the memories by blending in but that didn’t work.

And then somehow, he just was in that old body and he had Taehyung on his lap, he had no idea how it happened and it could probably be explained, he just wasn’t smart enough to do that. It didn’t matter how it happened though, he just needed to repeat it. He needed to get to talk to Taehyung for long enough to make him understand that whatever was going on in that world he lived in while he was ‘awake’ was all fake.

It took a while for the serum to start working, when it did, the light on the small machine turned from blue to red, which was an indication that it was working.

He closed his eyes and focused with his whole being on Taehyung, forcing his brain to find him.

When he opened his eyes, he wasn’t in the lab anymore. It was like he was surrounded by a strange mist, which was the telltale sign that he succeeded and was now in the alternate reality of Taehyung’s dreams.

He looked around and it only took him a short moment to recognize this memory.

They were in a beautiful garden of a countryside villa and there were few dozen people around them. It was a beautiful day and everyone looked so happy.

There were tables with people sitting around them, but there were also many people standing around tables that were almost bending with food and drinks.

There were people standing in a circle on a small impromptu dance floor in front of a stage with a life band.

He walked over to the circle, knowing what he was going to find inside. He himself still had very vivid memories of this day, it was arguably one of the happiest days of his life, it was the day he truly got to call Taehyung his. It was their wedding.

He saw himself and Taehyung slowly dancing to the jazz music in the middle of the circle of people watching them. They were completely immersed in each other, gazing into each other’s eyes lovingly. Taehyung looked absolutely breathtaking in his light beige suit and with the blonde hair. Jeongguk smiled when he remembered how the elder got it dyed specifically for the wedding, telling him that he really wanted to have light hair on their big day.

His heart ached a little as he watched the Taehyung and Jeongguk from the memory, they just looked so incredibly happy and he chuckled when he remembered how their friends often teased them for being disgustingly in love.

He tried to focus to repeat what happened once before. He wanted to get in the body of the past Jeongguk to get a chance to talk to Taehyung. But whatever he did, no matter how much he tried and prayed, it didn’t work.

“This is our wedding day, huh?” Taehyung suddenly spoke and that made Jeongguk stop trying and focus on him. He could tell that his husband escaped the memory trance and it was really him talking, while his memory self’s eyes were slightly glazed over. This already happened, unless he got in that Jeongguk, he was going to act and say exactly what he did back then.

“I have been wondering what it was like, I mean, I have seen the ring on my finger many times,” Taehyung continued: “It is confusing since it is so random, one time I am married, then another night we barely started dating. But it is nice to see this and live this.”

“You have already lived this,” Jeongguk said, hoping the elder would hear him, but from his previous attempts, he knew it wouldn’t work.

“I am not even sure if you really talked to me the other day or if I just imagined it,” Taehyung said sadly: “But I can finally see your face now without that annoying light and without you disappearing and me waking up. I guess that I somehow broke that curse and when it happened once, it can happen again. I am glad I can see you though because you are really damn handsome.”

That made Jeongguk smile. Even though Taehyung didn’t remember him, or at least not consciously, he still thought that he was handsome, that was endearing.

“Can’t you speak to me again? Can you say something, please?” the scientist asked sadly.

“I want to,” Jeongguk said, watching the pair continue slow dancing, wishing he could truly hold Taehyung in his arms and not just watch his past self have that privilege. He sighed: “I miss you every day, baby, but you have no idea because you don’t even know that everything you see and experience here in your dreams is real. But I am real and I swear that I will get to you and bring you home, I made a promise to someone very important and I can’t let them down.”

He knew that he wouldn’t be able to get through to Taehyung today, he had no idea how, but he just felt it. It was okay though, because he wasn’t going to stop trying and he knew that sooner or later he was going to succeed because he already did it once. In the meantime, he could enjoy watching the memories and cherish them. He knew that it would be wiser to get unplugged from that damn machine, but he wanted to stay with Taehyung for a while longer, at least until that one doze of the serum wore off.

So he just stood there and watched as Taehyung put head on the other Jeongguk’s shoulder and they continued dancing and he thought it was ridiculous that he was so jealous of himself. Because that other Jeongguk got to hold Taehyung while he couldn’t.

*

Taehyung opened his eyes, waking up in a familiar bed. It wasn’t the first time he has been here in his dream in the spacious house that he hasn’t had the chance of exploring entirely.

He felt well rested and just so comfortable and so happy. There was bright sunlight coming in the room through the big window and small breeze coming in where it was slightly opened.

He didn’t ever want to get out, not even when he realized that he was alone and there were no signs of Jeongguk.

But then something caught his attention as his senses started getting clearer.

He heard a squeaky laughter, laughter that very obviously belonged to children and it was coming from the outside.

That was definitely new, until now, everything he’s always seen or heard in this strange dreamland was Jeongguk and his voice, apart from that one time he was in the lab and talked to his colleagues. Even when sometimes there were other people, like recently when he dreamed about the wedding, he never really heard anyone, it was like they were only in the background and all he could focus on was Jeongguk.

But the laughter and muffled talking and yelling was intriguing, it was like some invisible force was pulling him towards the window to see what was happening and it was so powerful his chest actually hurt.

He got up from the warm bed, noticing he was weaking some silky pyjama bottoms and nothing else, and he stood up and slowly walked over to the window. As he was approaching, the chattering and laughter got louder and clearer.

When he finally looked out and saw two little toddlers, he gasped when powerful dull pain shot through his body. He couldn’t really describe it, but it was like some strong longing, different from the one he sometimes felt with Jeongguk.

There was a backyard with a little playground where the little kids were playing. Boy and girl, both loud and lively, and even though they were quite far away so he couldn’t truly see any details of their faces, he could tell that they weren’t blurry like he would expect.

The dull ache that shot through him was now settled in his chest and he felt so emotional for no apparent reason. He felt a strong urge to go to the backyard and see the kids, watch them run to him, see their smiles and feel their warmth as he held them in his arms.

He didn’t know how he knew this, but he was sure that these were his and Jeongguk’s children. This was the first time he saw them so he figured that on the timeline of this strange world, this must have been very recent and really, when he looked at his hand, he saw the familiar wedding ring.

He turned his attention back to the backyard when he saw someone walk out from a room under this one and by the black hair, he recognized Jeongguk.

“What are you two up to?” Jeongguk yelled with a smile apparent in his voice.

“We are playing, daddy,” the girl replied cheekily. The way she addressed Jeongguk confirmed Taehyung’s theory, these were their kids.

“I can see that,” Jeongguk chuckled and even though Taehyung’s couldn’t see his face since his back was to the house, he just knew that there was a bright smile on his face, the face that he only recently started finally seeing without that annoying bright light obscuring it.

“You are very loud though, I told you that papa was still sleeping, you are gonna wake him up,” Jeongguk reprimanded the children.

Papa.

Taehyung felt like his legs turned weaker and his heart sped up. That addressing felt so strangely familiar, it felt like it was his second name that he didn’t remember. Was that how the cute toddlers were calling him?

“No, we can’t wake up, papa, we want to bring him breakfast in bed!” the boy gasped.

“Yes, that’s the plan, the breakfast is ready now, so come on,” Jeongguk urged them and the kids instantly squealed and zoomed inside the house.

Taehyung was expecting to hear noise and voices inside the house and he was expecting the toddlers running inside the bedroom with Jeongguk behind them, carrying a tray with the breakfast. But nothing of that happened.

He felt huge disappointment that he couldn’t describe and understand. He wanted to see the children so badly, he wanted to put them on his lap and listen to their excited babbling as if it was something he was doing every day.

“They are beautiful, aren’t they?”

Taehyung gasped and jumped a little, startled by the voice coming from behind him. He turned around and saw Jeongguk, but that didn’t make any sense since all this time he has been looking at the door and no one came in.

“Where did you come from?” he asked.

“I don’t even know, honestly, this hasn’t happened before,” the other replied: “That one time I talked to you, I appeared in the body of that other Jeongguk. But he is still downstairs, making sure the breakfast is ready.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because I remember this day, it happened not that long ago.”

“What do you mean that it happened?” Taehyung frowned.

“I don’t really have time to explain, I have to talk to you,” Jeongguk stepped closer and his gaze was urgent: “I have been trying to reach you again since the last time but never succeeded. I don’t know what changed today, but that doesn’t matter.”

“I don’t understand anything.”

“I am not surprised, all this is very confusing and you think that you are dreaming.”

“I am though.”

“What does your world look like? You think that you are dreaming now, so that means you have a life when you wake up, what does it look like?” the black-haired man wondered.

“Um, well, I have a husband.”

“I suppose it is not me.”

“No, it’s not,” Taehyung shook his head.

“What is his name? What does he look like?”

“Well, he is very handsome and kind.”

“And what is his name?” Jeongguk insisted.

“His name? I just…I call him honey or dear or just…husband.”

“And that doesn’t seem strange to you?” Jeongguk asked with raised eyebrow: “Don’t you think that you should know the name of your husband?”

“I don’t understand what you are trying to say,” Taehyung’s confusion rose.

“What do you do during day when you are not asleep?”

“Well, I wake up, I make breakfast and then clean up and cook and wait for my husband to come home from work,” the brunette revealed.

“So you don’t work? You are at home every day?” Jeongguk wondered.

“I don’t need to work, my husband is earning enough money for both of us, I just take care of him and make sure that he has everything he needs.”

“And you are content with that?” Jeongguk scoffed: “The Taehyung I know is one of the most restless people, you like creating and developing and inventing, you could never be at home, you would go crazy.”

“What are you trying to achieve with all these questions and analysis of my life? Why are you doing this?” Taehyung asked.

“I know that this is hard to understand and accept, but whatever life you are living out there is not real.”

“That is just ridiculous.”

“I know that I am your dream, so it does sound ridiculous, but tell me, haven’t you noticed anything strange about your life? Isn’t it too repetitive, do you even go out?”

“Well…” Taehyung said hesitantly, feeling first doubts filling him. He did notice in the past that his days seemed awfully repetitive, but he always thought it was just due to habit and that he liked doing things in order. But Jeongguk was right about going out, he didn’t really do that and now that he thought about it, that was definitely weird.

“I don’t have time to explain everything, but you are under influence of certain technology. You told me before that it’s still in diapers though, so it is far from perfect and it is impossible to create elaborate world and details at the moment. It can be perfected, but it needs time, so for now it is impossible to create lots of people and places for them to be believable.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Taehyung asked, frustrated now: “What technology, what worlds?”

His eyes widened when the familiar white light appeared behind Jeongguk and started growing and getting brighter.

“I can’t hold on for much longer,” Jeongguk said: “But I will get to you and talk to you again, I promise. In the meantime, just think about what I’ve told you, pay more attention to your surroundings and details, because you have to believe me, Taehyung, I have to get you out of here.”

“Out of where?” Taehyung wondered, but it was too late. Jeongguk couldn’t reply because he was swallowed by the light and disappeared and soon after that, Taehyung woke up in the bed next to his husband. Husband whose name he didn’t know and never realized that, and for the first time he felt like there was truly something terrible going on.

*

What Jeongguk told Taehyung the last time they truly spoke was stuck in Taehyung’s head for days. He still continued having those dreams every time he fell asleep, but Jeongguk didn’t manage to directly speak to him in any of them.

But when Taehyung was awake, he kept thinking about Jeongguk’s advice, he kept paying more attention to his life and surroundings and it was all becoming more and more confusing and suspicious.

His days were almost all the same, he cooked different meals and he didn’t do things at exactly the same time of the day, but he realized that he was doings pretty much just few actions every single day.

The fact that he didn’t know, or couldn’t remember, his husbands name was bugging him and it all became more disturbing when he realized that he didn’t know the name of their Chihuahua either. He always called the dogs with some pet name, but no matter how hard he thought about it, he couldn’t figure out the real name.

He also started realizing that the strange dreams he has been having for months now were actually more vivid and life in them seemed richer than the one he truly lived. In those dreams, even though they were revolving around Jeongguk, he found himself in different places and settings. The most dreams were occurring in one of two apartments or the house – apartments presumably his and one Jeongguk’s before they moved in together and then the house was where they moved in sometime around the time they got married. But apart from those three places, he recalled some others, like the laboratory in which they met for the first time, or the wedding venue, one or two restaurants and even a supermarket.

But when he was awake, he didn’t go anywhere. The terrible realization started sinking in, he genuinely couldn’t recall going out. He didn’t have any memories of going grocery shopping even though the fridge and pantry were always filled with food, he didn’t remember running any other errands or going out to a restaurant or for a simple walk. Hell, he didn’t even walk the dog, he always let him out to the small backyard behind the house and that was it.

He felt like he was going crazy because he didn’t know what the reality was anymore. He was trying to convince himself that he was overthinking and that perhaps he had some sleeping and mental problems and that all this was just in his head, that his life was completely normal and he just had trouble with his memories. But there was something telling him that something truly vicious was going on, it was a feeling in the stomach that he had nonstop now, and he started thinking that the dreams about Jeongguk felt realer than the life he was living.

He saw the children again, although he never learned their names. But he got to see them from up close, he saw the beautiful face of the girl and the cute chubby cheeks of the boy. He got to be called papa by them and he got to have them sit on his lap.

It was the first dream that made him want to cry, he felt such strong longing in his chest that he thought he might pass out.

And when he woke up like he always did, he realized that his cheeks were wet and that he truly cried and then during the day, he caught himself wishing the children would be real and there with him. It felt like he missed them deeply, but was it possible to miss something or someone that you’ve never had in the first place?

He wanted to talk to Jeongguk so badly, he needed more information and more answers. He tried to go outside one day, opening the door and looking left and right on the familiar street of big houses, but when he wanted to step out and see what was at the end of the street, it felt like his legs were rooted in the ground and he couldn’t move and he felt unexplainable fear.

He shared his feelings and crazy thoughts with his husband and he didn’t laugh at him, but he told him that everything was alright and that this was their life and that they were happy.

But why didn’t Taehyung feel happy?

He tried to talk to Jeongguk on numerous occasions, breaking through the words that felt like were already said and speaking on his own, but the black-haired man never reacted, which told Taehyung that it wasn’t the real him.

*

He was sitting on a blanket, it was a beautiful summer day. His fingers were running through something soft that was resting on his lap and when he looked down, he saw that it was Jeongguk’s head and he was running the fingers through his hair.

“Is this one of our dates?” Taehyung asked and looked around. They were in some park, there were people around them with children and dogs, but he didn’t really see or hear them, which was normal since his senses were always apparently focused only on Jeongguk.

“Looks like a very nice date,” he added, glancing at his fingers and seeing the wedding ring there and he was quite impressed that they seemed to be so happy and loved up in marriage.

“You don’t hear me, do you?” he sighed, looking down at the other’s handsome profile. He was used to seeing Jeongguk now, but he still hasn’t gotten used to seeing just how beautiful he was and how it made him feel every time he lied his eyes on him. He looked sexy yet soft at the same time, it was such a strange but pleasant combination that Taehyung really loved.

“I wish you would talk to me,” he sighed again: “I want to understand what is going on here, you were right, my life outside of this…place just seems so strange.”

“I am glad that you finally see that.”

His head whipped around so quickly he was worried he might snap his neck, but he couldn’t help himself when he heard the familiar voice and sure enough, he saw Jeongguk standing just few meters from him.

When he looked down on his lap the other Jeongguk was gone, it was like he just disappeared into thin air, but he didn’t have time nor desire to question it.

“Are you really here? Are you really talking to me?” he asked eagerly and stood up. He didn’t dare to come closer to Jeongguk, but the other took few steps towards him.

“I am, I am sorry it took me so long, I have seen all your dreams and heard you call for me and talk to me,” Jeongguk nodded with apology written all over his face: “I have no idea how this works and why I can speak to you only sometimes, if you are doing it or I am.”

“You were right about my life, I have noticed some strange things.”

“I know, I heard you, I have been here the whole time, you just couldn’t see me.”

“You…you are not a dream, are you?” Taehyung got out slowly and carefully and he wasn’t sure if he wanted the answer to that question. Frankly, he didn’t know what he wanted to hear, did he hope that Jeongguk was real or that he just dreamt him?

“These are not dreams, Taehyung, these are your memories,” Jeongguk revealed with serious expression.

“Memories? I think I would have remembered if I was married before and had two kids,” Taehyung scoffed, but something in him knew that Jeongguk was telling him the truth.

“I didn’t want to tell you directly, I had no idea if revealing the truth wouldn’t hurt your brain, but I think I have no other choice. And your brain is the most brilliant one I’ve ever known, so I will hope that it can handle it.”

“Handle what? Tell me.”

“Like I said, these are memories and me and everything you have seen is real and it happened,” Jeongguk started: “The life you live when you think you are awake is not real. Do you remember what I told you about the technology the last time we spoke?”

“Something, yes, what is the technology about?”

“You invented it, it is a technology that you can be connected to and it will programme anything you want in your head, even fake memories and worlds.”

“How do I know these are not fake memories though?” Taehyung asked sceptically.

“Because these memories are detailed, aren’t they? They are not repetitive unlike your life when you are awake, that is because that life is just a program, not a very good one, but the technology is not perfect yet.”

“But why would I be connected to that technology?”

“Because you were kidnapped,” Jeongguk revealed: “I have been trying to find you ever since and I have found the way to reach you with that technology.”

“Why would anyone kidnap me?”

“Well, you are a world renowned scientist, Taehyung,” the black-haired man said: “You are brilliant, you have invented many things, so my guess is that someone really wants you to work with them and maybe they plugged you to this technology to brainwash you and make you forget about your previous life, I don’t know.”

“That sounds just crazy,” Taehyung shook his head.

“I know that it is hard to believe, but it makes sense. Your brain still remembers, your subconsciousness has been probably trying to let you know with these dreams about what is going on, your mind is trying to make you remember.”

“The kids…are they real?” Taehyung asked, holding his breath.

“They are, they are our kids, we adopted them more than three years ago and they are just as precious as you’ve seen them.”

Taehyung felt his eyes burn a little. He wanted to believe this so badly, he wanted to believe that he actually had some beautiful life where he had children and an interesting job and a husband that seemed so caring just from few of their encounters. But what if this was really just a dream?

“I am sure that it will all become clearer soon, but what I want to tell you right now is important,” Jeongguk said urgently.

“What is it?”

“You have to wake up, Taehyung, you have to get out of that fake world.”

“You mean…the one when I’m awake?”

“Yes, it is important because we have no idea how much damage it can do to your brain to be connected to that technology for a long time.”

“But how do I wake up when I am already awake?” Taehyung wondered.

“You will figure that out, I know you will, maybe…try to go out,” Jeongguk suggested.

“I have tried and I couldn’t.”

“Then that is a sign that you’re on the right way, the program is just trying to stop you, you need to fight it and leave!”

The annoying, white light appeared behind Jeongguk and they both knew that their moments was over soon.

“But what will I do…if I wake up for real? If I really was kidnapped then I am held somewhere,” Taehyung asked shakily.

“I don’t know, we will figure that out, but I promise that I will find you, baby, I will!” Jeongguk reassured him.

Taehyung stretched out his hand, wanting to touch the other, but before he could do that and feel the warmth of his face against his fingers, everything was enveloped in the light and he woke up.

Chapter Text

The bedroom was still dark when he woke up, which was a change since usually there was some sunlight going in. He checked the clock on the bedside table and saw that it was nearly six in the morning, but he has noticed that he usually got up at seven.

That was the routine, he and his husband got up and while he went to prepare breakfast, his husband went to take a shower and get ready for work.

They ate together and at eight, his husband left.

There was a part of him that wanted to go back to sleep or that just wanted to lie there for another hour to not break that routine. But there was also some reluctant, rebellious part of him that wanted to break the routine and get up right now and those sides were fighting inside him for a while.

His limbs felt heavy when he finally dragged himself out and he thought about what Jeongguk told him – about the programme trying to keep him in check and doing whatever it could to prevent him from acting out of order.

But he thought about Jeongguk’s other words too, about the advice to fight it and about how Taehyung’s mind was strong and brilliant. He didn’t really feel it, he couldn’t imagine that he was some super intelligent scientist, he was just a normal guy that stayed at home while his husband was providing for them.

He got out of the bed and went to the bathroom, thinking about everything Jeongguk has told him. It all sounded just crazy, how could this life be fake? He was here, his husband and their dog were here, he has been living this life for so long.

He realized that he didn’t really remember much, those thoughts were on his mind before, when Jeongguk told him to pay attention to details, but now all of it seemed even more apparent. He honestly couldn’t remember anything, he couldn’t remember anything about his life and family, about his childhood or teen years, hell, he didn’t even remember anything about his husband, their dates or their wedding or how they moved into this house. It just felt like…he suddenly appeared here one day and that was it.

He was scared to try to do something different, there was this unexplainable anxiety to break to routine, but perhaps it was really the programme in his head trying to prevent him from acting. But he thought that he had nothing to lose, right? What could really happen if he tried to go outside and see what was out there at the end of the street? If his crazy dreams weren’t real, if Jeongguk and everything he told him wasn’t real, then surely nothing bad would happen.

“Honey, why are you up so early?” his husband asked when he came back to the bedroom.

“I just couldn’t sleep anymore,” Taehyung replied.

“Come back to bed, there is no reason to get up just yet.”

“I don’t want to.”

“There is still time.”

“Why do you insist so much?” Taehyung turned to face the other, looking at him suspiciously: “What does it matter when I get up? Is it because it’s against the programme?”

“What programme? What are you talking about, honey?” the man looked at him with a frown.

“Of course, you wouldn’t know, if you are part of the programme, you have no idea what is going on here.”

“Taehyung, darling, you are not making any sense.”

“Maybe, but I am not going back to bed, you suit yourself and stay there until seven, I am going to the kitchen.”

He left the bewildered man behind and left the bedroom. For some strange reason, the house just seemed different, and Taehyung thought that it was perhaps because he has never seen it at this hour. His brain wasn’t used to it, it wasn’t how the programme was created.

He was scared to find out if Jeongguk was real and if he was telling him the truth. Not only would it mean that he was kidnapped and he had no idea what would happen to him if he woke up, but he was scared mostly because he wanted it to be true. He wanted to believe that he was married to Jeongguk and they had two children together and that he was more than just a househusband. If none of it turned out to be true, he knew that he was going to be terribly disappointed.

He stayed quiet and tried to hear if his husband was getting up or not. He figured that if the wanted to attempt to get out of the house, it was best to do it while he wasn’t close because he might attempt to stop him. He knew that he could just wait until he left for work, but he was done waiting. He didn’t want to spend more time in this world if it was really fake, he wanted to get out.

He walked over to the front door and opened it.

“Taehyung, what are you doing?”

He jumped with a gasp and when he turned around, he was facing his husband. He didn’t hear him at all, it was like he appeared out of nowhere and that just supported the whole crazy theory about this all being just some programme that was uploaded in his brain.

“I wanna go for a walk,” he replied casually.

“Why would you want that? You never go out,” the husband retorted.

“Yes, and that is why I want to go, I am bored of sitting around all day, I wanna go for a walk now,” Taehyung said stubbornly and stepped outside.

The street looked normal, there was nothing out of ordinary and that encouraged him to go for it. His legs felt heavy but he decided to fight against the instinct to go back inside, following Jeongguk’s plea and willing himself to pull through and see what was out there.

He was startled when his wrist was grabbed rather harshly and when he looked at his husband, he was glaring at him: “You can’t leave, Taehyung, you have to make me breakfast.”

“You can make it yourself for once,” he retorted and freed himself from the grasp.

“You can’t leave, Taehyung,” the man repeated and there was something so unsettling in his eyes that it made Taehyung move. He didn’t just walk, he started running, he turned to the left and sprinted as fast as he could towards the end of the street. He had no idea if he was being followed, he didn’t look back to see, he didn’t want to slow himself down. So he just focused on his goal and ran over the empty road.

He was out of breath when he got to an intersection that he has never seen before. He looked around, not sure which way to go, but then he figured that it didn’t matter. So instead of going left or right, he just ran straight.

He felt strange pressure when he got to the middle of the intersection, it was like there was some invisible barrier, it was like he was trying to get through some really thick fog, he could walk through it, but it was hard.

He kept going though, groaning in determination as he pushed through the invisible fog with eyes fixed on the other side of the intersection. He couldn’t see anything there, only the road and he was absolutely sure that it was the way out.

Finally he made it, it felt like the fog disappeared so he was free to move normally again and he stepped on the road that he didn’t know where it led.

Suddenly he felt dizzy and some kind of darkness appeared and it was all around him, slowly closing on him and threatening to trap him. He was scared and he was shaking a little, but he took a deep breath and just stood there, wanting to see what happened next and accepting his destiny whatever it was.

The darkness enveloped him whole until it felt like he didn’t exist.

He let out a loud gasp and sat up abruptly, opening his eyes. Part of him was expecting to see the bedroom and his husband sleeping next to him, part of him expected to see that it was seven o’clock and he just woke up from another dream. But that wasn’t what happened.

He looked around, completely confused to find himself in an empty white room with nothing but bed and some machines plugged to his body. He heard rhythmical beeping and then saw a screen that was showing his pressure and heart rate, he saw IVs with some fluids inserted into his veins and felt catheter inserted in his penis.

The beeping started getting faster just when he felt his heart do the same and his head was spinning as it started processing what was happening.

Then the single door leading to the room opened and some nurse ran in.

*

Taehyung was perfectly confused, his brain didn’t manage to process all the new information as he woke up in what looked like a hospital room.

The nurse that came started examining him and she started pulling out everything that was in his body, she also took off the electrodes that were on his head and chest.

“What is happening? Where am I?” he asked shakily, but she didn’t reply, acting like she didn’t even hear him.

He looked frantically around, taking in his surroundings, but there wasn’t much to go by. He noticed a big mirror on one of the walls that reminded him of those one way windows behind which someone could watch him.

The door opened again and a man walked in. Taehyung was shocked and even more confused when he realized that he knew this one.

“Jimin?” he breathed out, looking at his friend that he knew from that fictional world. Now he was here, in flesh, walking to him.

“What are you doing here? And where am I? What is going on here?” he instantly bombed Jimin with questions that were popping in his head.

“I will explain everything,” Jimin said with a kind smile that had calming effects on Taehyung’s frantic mind. He came to bed and gently touched Taehyung’s forearm: “But first, you have to calm down, your heartrate is going crazy. I understand that you are confused and scared, but you really need to breathe, alright?”

Taehyung nodded, trying to focus on the task of breathing and he started instantly feeling better.

“The nurse will take everything off,” Jimin told him: “So just stay calm and let her do her job. Then she will bring you something to eat, you haven’t had a normal food in ages and then she will show you the bathroom, I bet you will really want to take a shower.”

Taehyung just nodded, eyes still frantically looking around.

“I have to go now, but I promise I will come soon and answer all the questions you have, alright?” Jimin said soothingly.

“How come you are here? I thought…you were just in my head.”

“Like I said, I will explain everything.”

“Alright,” Taehyung breathed out. He was still feeling slightly dizzy because it was so confusing to wake up in this unfamiliar room, and there was just so much on his mind. It turned out that everything Jeongguk told him appeared to be true, he really was in some fake world, and that must also mean that he really was kidnapped. That would mean that he could trust no one around here, not even Jimin, especially not him. But he also wanted answers to all his questions and he doubted he could just run away when he didn’t even know where he was, so all he could really do was listen to what Jimin had to say.

Jimin left the room when he was sure that Taehyung was calm enough to not go into a panic attack that he looked to be close to. He went back to where he came from, walking into the room next to Taehyung’s and stood next to two men that were looking at Taehyung through the one-way-window.

“I think he is calm for now,” Jimin announced.

“What a shame that he already woke up,” a man in a suit replied.

“I warned you he would,” Jimin retorted: “Even since I plugged to him and he told me about having those dreams, it was just matter of time before he’d break free.”

“That doesn’t matter now, it is time for plan B,” the man said and glanced at the other man standing by his side: “Come, both of you, we have to quickly discuss the plan before he starts demanding answers.”

They went to a small meeting room, they have already discussed the plan B, but they needed to agree on some details because it was crucial for the story to be believable.

“Jimin, you know what we previously agreed on, let’s go with that,” the man in the suit who was the boss said.

“I’m counting on it,” Jimin nodded.

“But what if he remembers now? When Jimin talked to him a while ago, he already had doubts, we have no idea how far it’s progressed and what knows,” the third man pointed out.

“That serum you were working on, is it ready?” the boss asked.

“Yes, I just finished it few days ago.”

“Then we will use it on him.”

“Boss, in all respect, I haven’t had time to test it, we don’t really know if it works.”

“You get the chance to test it on him, Yoongi.”

“Is it a good idea though? He is one of the best scientists in the country, do we really want to risk causing some brain damage with my untested serum?” Yoongi said with a little frown.

“We don’t have other choice, that is my last word,” the boss said with finality: “Bring it to the nurse so she can inject him with it, Jimin knows what to tell him about it, we have discussed that too.”

“But what about those dreams? He will be surely asking, if Jeon managed to tell him something, he might not believe us,” Jimin pointed out.

“We will go with what Yoongi suggested the other day, you will tell him that it was another program that was supposed to test how strong the main one is, you will tell him that none of it was real and that those dreams were inserted by us as well. Along with Yoongi’s serum, it should work out the way we want it.”

“And what will we do with him from now on?”

“What we have planned since the beginning, remember, he is our best scientist and he can help us finish that project that has been just lying there for months because no one could make any breakthrough.”

“You think he can?” Yoongi wondered.

“He has invented many impressive technologies, I don’t know about anyone in this country being able to finish it if not him,” the boss said with sparkles in his eyes.

Jimin and Yoongi exchanged quick, subtle looks, but they didn’t comment on it, it was not their place to question anything.

“Go get ready to talk to him, when you explain everything, you can take him to the lab, his desk there is ready so it might help him trusting us,” the boss looked at Jimin.

Both him and Yoongi got up and bowed their heads when the man in the suit stood up, making it clear that the short meeting was over and without any other word, he walked away.

“I have to go get that serum,” Yoongi told Jimin quietly.

“I have a feeling that this plan is not going to go as smoothly as the boss imagines,” Jimin whispered.

“What else are we supposed to do though? We have to go with it.”

“Even if it was working, Jeon and others are still looking for him.”

“They don’t have any leads to us.”

“As far as we know, but remember, he has that technology and he will continue trying to get in Taehyung’s head.”

“Well, let’s hope my serum is strong enough,” Yoongi sighed and that’s how they parted ways.

The shower made Taehyung feel a lot better, it felt like he hasn’t taken one in ages and it was probably true. He had no idea for how long he was lying in that bed, plugged to all those machines, some of them he couldn’t even identify.

The nurse led him back to the room and there was food waiting for him. He felt like throwing up just when he looked at it, but she urged him to eat something and take it slow since his only nutrition came from the IVs for some time.

He sat at a table that appeared in the room while he was gone and started slowly eating, there were still like hundred questions running around in his head.

The door to the room opened after a while and Jimin walked in like he promised before.

“How do you feel?” he asked with caring expression as he sat opposite from Taehyung.

“How do you think?” Taehyung retorted bitterly.

“I understand that you are confused and I am here to explain everything. I was asking about your physical health though,” Jimin said calmly without any traces of being bothered by Taehyung’s snarky comment.

“I feel slightly sick to my stomach, but I guess that is normal since I wasn’t eating normally. How long it’s even been, for how long was I in that bed?”

“About eight weeks.”

“What? Two months?!”

“We made sure you had everything you need, don’t worry, you were getting enough vitamins and minerals and all the other nutrients.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? What the hell was that even about?” Taehyung demanded to know.

“That is why I am here now, I told you that I was going to answer all the questions you have.”

“Then maybe you could start with explaining who the hell are you? How come I saw you…in that other place and what are you doing here?”

“I plugged in few times to check how you are doing, I posed as your friend in that reality so you would trust me and talked to me honestly,” Jimin revealed.

“Oh, so you were posing as someone else to gain my trust, huh? That really makes me feel better now,” Taehyung retorted sarcastically.

“I know that you are really confused now, but you have to understand one thing, Taehyung, I am not your enemy,” the elder said with serious expression.

“That is something I am not so sure about. Do you remember the dreams I was telling you about?”

“Yes, I remember.”

“That guy from them told me what was going on here, he told me that it was a fake world that I was held in. He told me that the people that did it to me kidnapped me.”

“You weren’t kidnapped, Taehyung,” Jimin chuckled lightly: “Actually, all this was your idea, you are the reason why you were in that bed and plugged to that technology you yourself invented. You wanted to test it on yourself.”

Taehyung stared at the other with parted mouth. Nothing really made sense now, everything he has experienced in the past two months was fake and now he was learning that he put himself through it voluntarily?

“That just doesn’t make any sense,” he got out.

“It will when you hear everything, it is understandable that you have a hard time remembering, your brain is having a hard time with processing all the information and distinguishing between what is real and what is not, you yourself told me about this, you said that this is going to be a very likely side effect of that thingy over there,” Jimin nodded his head towards a small box that was glowing with light blue light with wires with electrodes coming from it, they were previously on Taehyung’s head and chest when he woke up.

“What exactly is that thing?” Taehyung eyed the box.

“Your invention, don’t ask me how it works, I don’t really understand,” Jimin snorted: “But to put it simply for you to have some answers now, it creates kind of a virtual reality in your brain, it is possible to upload pretty much any program in it.”

“Like a programme of having a husband and a dog?”

“Yes, like that,” Jimin nodded: “It is still a very new technology so it is not capable of much, but the idea for the future is for it to be perfected to the point it would create elaborated, amazing worlds.”

“So that is why I could never leave my house and why there was just that one street outside?”

“Yes, it’s because of the limitations.”

“Just like not knowing my husband’s and dog’s names,” Taehyung scoffed: “That is pretty stupid, although I must be stupid too since I didn’t realize sooner.”

“It’s all about what information your brain wants,” Jimin shrugged: “You didn’t care about their names because you didn’t have the need to, they were just your husband and your dog.”

“And you? Were you some projection and part of the program too?”

“No, I was really there, I plugged myself to the box as well and entered in that program, so we really talked together.”

“I see,” Taehyung hummed: “But I still don’t understand, you said that I invented this thing and that I wanted to test it…”

“Yes, you signed yourself up for this, you even joked about being your own guinea pig,” the elder chuckled.

“Isn’t it dangerous though?”

“That’s what I told you, but you didn’t listen, you wanted to test it. I can show you a document that you signed about this experiment, it is a safety guard of this company so you wouldn’t sue them or said that they did something against your will.”

“A company? What kind of company?”

“You work here, just like I do,” Jimin explained: “We even live here, it is in a very remote area.”

“But what do we do here?” Taehyung asked, intrigued to learn the new information. He was still very confused and there were still lots of doubts on his mind, but the more he was learning, the more it was making sense to him.

“It is a private research company developing, testing and selling new technologies. We’re talking about very elaborate and futuristic technologies and you are one of our main scientists, you are specializing in engineering and neuroscience, that is your domain.”

“And you?”

“Oh, I am not a scientist, I am…well, what you would call a head of security, I suppose, but I collaborate with all departments of the company and do lots of things.”

“So I am a big brain, huh?” Taehyung looked around.

“Yes, you are,” Jimin nodded with an amused smile: “Come on, you might get some memories back if you go and see your lab.”

“But why can’t I seem to remember?”

“Well, you were worried prior to the experiment that the new technology might have some negative effect on your brain, especially the memory part. I suppose you were right, but I think that it might be just temporary, I think that when you get adjusted and your brain accepts that this is the reality, your memories will eventually come back,” the security agent said and got up, telling Taehyung to follow him.

They walked through a grey corridor and from what Taehyung has seen so far, the place looked quite cold and impersonal, but he supposed some research building would probably look like that. He wondered about his living quarters, Jimin said they lived there, if that was true, he hoped those were a lot nicer than this.

They walked in a laboratory and for a moment Taehyung was expecting to see the one that he has seen in his dreams couple of times, the one where he and Jeongguk met for the first time, the one where he talked to Seokjin as well.

“Where is Seokjin? Is he here?” he wondered.

“Seokjin? There is no Seokjin here,” Jimin said with raised eyebrow as he led Taehyung to a desk. It was very tidy and there were some things lying around, what caught his attention was a frame with a photo. He took it and looked at it, seeing himself, Jimin and one other man, smiling at the camera while hugging each other around shoulders.

“Who is this?” Taehyung asked, pointing at the third man.

“That is Yoongi, my boyfriend that works here, you are gonna see him soon. He is a scientist too, you often work together.”

“It looks like we are close.”

“We are friends, yes,” Jimin nodded.

“I am so confused,” Taehyung sighed, rubbing his temples and sitting on a chair next to him. When he woke up, he thought he’d be in the reality he hoped for, he knew that he wouldn’t see Jeongguk if what he told him was true and he was kidnapped. He was glad that he wasn’t kidnapped, but now he was finding out that he had a completely different life than what his supposed husband was telling him about. Well, at the very least, he could be hundred percent sure now that the reality with the husband and the dog whose names he didn’t know was fake, but what about this and the reality with Jeongguk?

“That is understandable, you should take a proper rest,” Jimin squeezed his shoulder: “It will take time for you to adjust and you need a good quality sleep too. The boss will come to talk to you and you will return to work as soon as you feel like you can.”

“I don’t remember anything about my work though.”

“You will soon, your brain and your hands remember it, this is what you have been doing, it will come back to you.”

“There is something I still don’t understand,” Taehyung looked at the other: “Can you be honest with me and give me a clear answer?”

“Of course, that is what I am here for,” Jimin nodded and his eyes were so sincere it didn’t even cross Taehyung’s mind that he could be lying.

“You said it was really you that was talking to me in that virtual world, not just some projection. Do you remember what I told you about the dreams I had?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Well, those dreams progressed a lot since the last time I spoke to you,” Taehyung admitted: “I managed to speak to that guy, directly, not to his dream self.”

“His dream self?” Jimin asked with raised eyebrows.

“I don’t really understand it, but he told me that he was able to somehow connect to me. He told me many things, it was him that told me that I was actually plugged to some device and that I should get out. He told me that I was kidnapped.”

“I told you that you weren’t, Tae, if that was true, that would mean I am lying here to you,” Jimin said and Taehyung honestly couldn’t read him.

“He told me that I was a scientist.”

“Yes, you are.”

“But he told me that he is my husband and that he is looking for me, he told me we adopted kids together and I saw them…” Taehyung said with clear hope in his eyes.

“Taehyung,” Jimin sighed: “What you dreamt of sounds wonderful, it really does, but that was all fake too.”

“I don’t believe it,” Taehyung frowned. He felt somewhere deep inside that Jeongguk and the two kids were real, he just knew it, it felt like they were part of him. But he also felt like it was probably too good to be true and he didn’t know what to believe.

“You work and live here,” Jimin repeated.

“But what were those dreams about then? Don’t tell me that my brain is so damn brilliant that it made up this guy and everything so vividly that it made me escape from the alternate reality and wake up!”

“Tae, those dreams were just another program that you created,” Jimin revealed.

“W-what?” the younger got out, instantly feeling hopeless and defeated.

“The program with the husband and the dog was the main one, the dreams that you were seeing was a counter-program created to test how much it would take to convince you that you were living in a fake reality.”

Taehyung just stared at the other, he didn’t want to believe it but it also made sense. It would make sense that they wanted to test how strong the main program was and what it would take for his brain to accept that he was plugged to some machine and wake up.

“I am really sorry,” Jimin smiled apologetically: “But Jeongguk isn’t real, he was just someone that you developed, as well as the children and all those images you thought were memories.”

Taehyung felt defeated, he wanted to believe so badly that there was really someone that loved him as much as the dreams were suggesting. When he was having them, the way Jeongguk treated him, it was just so beautiful. And now he was just supposed to accept that it was all fake as well?

“I am tired,” he mumbled: “And I am starting to have a headache.”

“I understand, I will show you your room and you should rest. Someone will also come and give you an injection.”

“What for?”

“For the device to work, you developed a serum that stimulates the brain to be wired correctly, again, don’t ask me how that really works, you are the inventor,” Jimin explained: “You developed another serum too for when you woke up, since we don’t really knows the side effects of the device, you need a boost to make sure that your brain and nervous system is adjusting correctly and that there is no damage. We wouldn’t want your genius brain to fry.”

“Whatever, I will take anything you tell me,” Taehyung shrugged and stood up from the chair. Right now, he didn’t really want to think about anything. He just needed to be alone and rest and think about everything he’s just learned. If he woke up and remembered everything from before he was plugged in to that device, it would have been much easier, but apparently he had at least a temporary amnesia so that was making everything even harder.

Jimin showed Taehyung his bedroom, it was spacious enough for a bed and even a sofa and a desk with chair, it also had a nice, private bathroom.

“If you needed anything, mine and Yoongi’s room is just across the hallway,” Jimin pointed at one door.

“Thank you,” Taehyung nodded lifelessly and that was Jimin’s cue to leave him alone.

It was an evening so it was after working hours, he knew that Yoongi wouldn’t be in his lab anymore, so he headed straight to their room. Sure enough, he found his boyfriend on a sofa, reading some scientific book that Jimin would never have a chance of understanding. Even when he wasn’t working, Yoongi was still dedicated to science, always educating himself on different topics to gain knowledge that he could use on future projects. Jimin really admired that about him, but right now, he really needed to talk to him.

Yoongi closed the book when Jimin flopped down on the sofa next to him with a heavy sigh. They have been together for years for him to know when Jimin needed to rant, so he gave him his attention without saying anything, but his gaze was enough for the security agent to understand.

“It’s exhausting to pretend like I am friends with someone I barely know,” Jimin grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You are the best candidate for this, you are the only one that Taehyung knows since you were plugged to that thing with him couple of time,” Yoongi replied calmly, knowing that the other was going to get a lot more passionate.

“I know, I just don’t like this,” Jimin groaned: “Telling him all these fucking lies, I can literally see how damn confused he is with everything. It’s not enough that he was plugged to that device for two months and that alone could have fucked him up, but now we are lying to him about his identity and even injecting him with that shit you developed to ensure that his memories are not gonna come back.”

“I don’t like it any more than you,” Yoongi reassured him: “I am a scientist and I have huge respect for Kim Taehyung, he is the best of the best in the field.”

“Even better than the genius Min Yoongi?” the other teased.

“Yes, he is better than me and I am not ashamed to admit that. That is the reason why the company wanted him so much, you know that.”

“Yes, well, when a company wants someone to work for them, they usually reach out to them and offer them a good salary and bonuses,” Jimin scoffed: “But kidnapping? Babe, I haven’t signed up for this, we are crossing a big damn line here.”

“I know,” Yoongi sighed: “It is fucked up, but what can we do? When the boss decides something, it is hard to go against him.”

“I just think this is wrong,” Jimin mumbled sadly: “He has a husband and kids and he was taken away from them by force and now his brain is turned into a mush of memories and doubts. When I imagine that something like this would happen to you, I get angry, it just isn’t right. These corporations are going too far, they have no regard for human life, they just want the best people to develop new technologies for them. So they will keep Taehyung’s head empty and they will have him work for them because there is no one that knows how to move with that big project.”

“Taehyung is possibly the only person that might.”

“Yeah and that is the reason why they are doing all this.”

“You know it’s for the best to keep our mouths shut and just do whatever they want, they are not fucking around, it could end badly for us,” Yoongi warned his boyfriend with a worried look.

“I know,” Jimin sighed and snuggled to Yoongi’s side: “I just hate this, it is wrong, but what other choice do we have than to continue doing what they want?”

Chapter Text

“You are still trying?” Seokjin sighed when he walked in the lab and found Jeongguk plugged to the machine that he has been using to communicate with Taehyung.

“Should I just give up and move on?” the younger asked sarcastically.

“Of course not, but you haven’t reached him for days,” Seokjin pointed out: “You would be more productive if you were searching for him in the real world and not in the dreams.”

“If I reach him in his dreams, I can find out where he is,” Jeongguk said with conviction: “We have been looking for him for weeks and we haven’t been successful, we still have no idea who took him, let alone where they hold him.”

“I came to talk to you, I was just checking the results of your tests.”

“And?”

“There is something on the MRI scans of your brain that I don’t like.”

“Is it something unusual? Maybe it is usual for me.”

“I wouldn’t say so, I compared it to the scans we have done before and this is new,” Seokjin said, handing Jeongguk two sheets of brain scans. He looked at them and he could see that they were different, but he had no idea what that meant.

“Hyung, I am not a neuroscientist or a doctor, I have no idea what I am looking at,” the agent reminded him.

“You don’t really need to know all the technical stuff, you wouldn’t understand it anyway,” the scientist said: “You just need to know that there are some anomalies that worry me and I am pretty sure that damn machine is doing it.”

“Is it dangerous?”

“That is hard to say, I personally think that it is just temporary and when you stop using that machine, it will all go back to normal. But there is a huge probability that the longer you use it, the more damage it might be causing. Do you feel tired lately? Do you sleep enough and well?”

“My husband was kidnapped, what do you think?” Jeongguk scoffed: “I think that no one in my situation would sleep well.”

“I think that the machine is messing with your sleeping cycle too, it’s not just stress and desire to find Taehyung. You should take a break for a couple of days and rest and then we will run new tests.”

“Hyung, I can’t stop now,” Jeongguk protested: “Do you know what I think? Why I can’t reach him? I think he woke up.”

“Well, that would be good news, god knows what it has done to him to be plugged to that thing for so long. But if you are right and he is no longer plugged then how do you expect to reach him? You were only able to do that because you were somehow able to get on his frequency,” Seokjin frowned.

“That’s not how Tae designed the thing though,” Jeongguk shook his head: “He never designed it to work only if both subjects were plugged to it, it should be possible to get in his head even when he is no longer ‘online’ as he used to call it.”

“Then maybe someone else could do it so you can take a break, maybe Hobi, or even I can do it.”

“No, it has to be me!” the younger snapped. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose: “Sorry, hyung, I didn’t mean to snap.”

“It’s okay.”

“I just…I know this will sound stupid, but I think that only I can do it, you know?” Jeongguk looked at the other: “Maybe anyone can reach him in his dreams, but I think that only I can really get through to him and talk to him.”

“Well, it is not stupid to think that, you have a stronger connection with him than anyone,” Seokjin admitted.

“And he already knows me, well, if he remembers me from when he was plugged in that fake reality. If he really is awake, that means he is probably imprisoned, what else would they do with him? If I can reach him and talk to him, he might describe to me his surroundings and that might help us find him.”

“If he really is held somewhere, I doubt he really knows where he is, Jeongguk-ah.”

“I know, but every little thing can help. We have nothing to lose, do we? I just really wanna find him,” Jeongguk sighed, feeling mentally and physically exhausted. Every day that Taehyung was gone was miserable, not knowing what was happening to his husband was terrifying, he had no idea how dangerous the people that took him were, he had no idea if they would harm him.

“We all do, Jeongguk-ah,” Seokjin sighed: “We are all here for you, but you won’t be able to help him if you keep overworking yourself so much.”

“I guess taking a day or two off can’t hurt,” the younger gave up: “I could stop by to see the twins.”

“Yeah, you could, they will be happy to see you,” Seokjin smiled: “Go home now, take a shower, eat some big, unhealthy dinner and go get some sleep. Do you want me to give you some sleeping pills?”

“No, I think I will have a beer or two, that will help knock me out and it is healthier than pills.”

“I don’t condone alcohol abuse but having a drink here and there doesn’t hurt, just don’t make it a habit to help you sleep, that could lead you down a rabbit hole.”

“I can’t afford to become an alcoholic, you don’t have to worry about that,” Jeongguk chuckled and then he turned more serious: “Thank you for everything, hyung, especially for having Taemin and Jihyo and taking care of them, I don’t know what I would do without you and your support.”

“We are all here for you, Jeongguk-ah,” the elder patted his back softly: “We are a family and we don’t leave anyone behind, you know that everyone is doing whatever they can to find Tae and we will.”

“I hope you are right,” Jeongguk nodded with a sad smile. It was one of those moments when he felt the lack of Taehyung’s presence strongly, ever since they started dating, they haven’t been apart for that long and he really missed him and he prayed to whatever gods were out there to protect his husband and bring him back to him.

*

“Dr. Kim, I am glad to see you are finally feeling better and working again,” a man in a suit said with a smile when he came to the laboratory. He added: “I am Choi Taejoon and I am in charge of this facility.”

“It is nice to meet you, sir,” Taehyung bowed and eyed the other man that came with the boss. He recognized him from the photo on his desk, it was Yoongi, Jimin’s boyfriend and, apparently, his close friend.

“I see you are busy with that machine of yours,” Mr. Choi nodded at the little box that was lying on the lab table, half dismantled.

“Well, I still don’t remember much, but I was told that I invented this, so I wanted to take a look to see how it works.”

“I am sure it will all come back to you again.”

“It seems familiar,” Taehyung nodded: “I don’t know how, but I recognize the components as if the memories of it were somewhere at the back of my mind.”

“I am glad that you are trying to see how it works, it is a very sophisticated and useful technology,” Mr. Choi nodded: “You wanted to test it to see what it can do and what adjustments it needs.”

“The problem is that I messed up my brain and memories, so I guess that has set me back,” Taehyung replied.

“Like I said, it will all come back to you and then you will be able to work on perfecting it. There are people that are very interested in that technology, especially now that we know how it works since you tested it.”

“How exactly do you or the people expect it to work? What do you want to do with it?” the scientist wondered.

“Well, it has a big potential in many fields,” the man replied: “We can upload all kinds of programs in it, not just made-up lives like the one you were part of, but it can be used for training. The army would be interested in something like this, just imagine how effective the training would be if soldiers could be plugged to it and receive training that way, they could train combat in the field without actually being there and getting hurt.”

“Of course, the army,” Taehyung scoffed.

“The army is one of the clients that are very interested in new technologies,” Mr. Choi shrugged.

“I was thinking it could be used more for educational purposes, not for war.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“Well, imagine if every school had this, there could be educational programs so the students would learn history, biology and so on practically,” Taehyung suggested: “Or it could be used for elderly and really sick people, so they could continue living their lives.”

“Those are all very good ideas and I agree with you, just because the army is interested in it doesn’t mean it couldn’t be used in different fields. This is an amazing technology that I am sure could be used by almost everyone. I hope you will remember how it works so you can keep working on it, your testing has shown that it is still not perfect and that the programs that can be uploaded in it are limited. We have also been working on a technology that can’t work without this one.”

“What technology?” Taehyung wondered.

“I have developed a microchip fit for implantation,” Yoongi spoke for the first time: “The idea is that the microchip would send information straight to the brain, but we have trouble figuring out how to connect it to the neurological system. That is where your technology and you come in, you are the specialist in neuroscience.”

“There is a difference between plugging yourself to something with electrodes and uploading it into a small microchip and having it send impulses straight to the brain though,” the younger frowned.

“Yes, and that is why we haven’t figured out how to do it yet and that is why we need you,” Yoongi nodded.

“I am not sure how I feel about it,” Taehyung admitted: “That sounds very dystopian, injecting people with microchips and having information sent to their brains, you could upload anything there, you could rewrite their memories and opinions.”

“That is the idea,” Mr. Choi said.

“I am sure that the government would be very interested in such an invention,” Taehyung scoffed: “They would surely be happy if people that don’t support them were basically brainwashed into changing their mind and have undying trust and loyalty to them.”

“It is not our place to decide what to do with the technologies we invent, we are only developing them, it is up to buyers what they want to do with them,” Mr. Choi pointed out.

“I might not remember much, but I do remember that I have integrity, sir,” Taehyung said coldly: “I am a scientist, I love inventing new technologies, but I want to do it to help humanity and not to destroy free will. I don’t want to invent another atomic bomb and watch everything we know change into a terrible dystopia.”

“Dr. Kim, it is not your place to-“

“I will help Taehyung to remember this technology,” Yoongi jumped in and pointed at the small box: “I had time to study it while he was testing it, so I know quite a lot about it and that information might help him remember everything.”

“Yes, you do that,” Mr. Choi nodded, giving Taehyung one last pointed look before he left the lab.

“I don’t like that,” Taehyung grumbled: “I don’t want our inventions to be misused by greedy and powerful people.”

“I agree with you,” Yoongi reassured him: “But we are still just working on it, we don’t even know if we will be able to finish it and if it will be sold and put to use. And even without proper memories, I am sure that you know that if we don’t invent new technologies, someone else will, so one way or another, it can’t be stopped.”

“So you are saying that we should just try to be the first,” Taehyung sighed before he stretched his hand towards Yoongi: “I am Taehyung, by the way, I know that we are friends, so introducing myself is stupid, but I don’t remember almost anything.”

“It’s fine, I am Yoongi,” the elder said and, for the first time, he gave him a hint of smile.

“My brain is still a mush, but I feel very intrigued, I guess that is my curious, scientific mind. I want to relearn how this works so we can move forward,” Taehyung said and walked to the small machine.

“I am glad to see your curiosity is coming back, that is what makes you a great inventor,” Yoongi said: “I will tell you everything I know about this thing, but it is your invention so there are still things I don’t know.”

“I wish my memories came back, it would be much easier.”

“Let’s hope that will happen soon,” the elder nodded, but he knew that wasn’t very likely to happen, not when Taehyung was being given injections of his serum every day.

*

It’s been two weeks since Taehyung woke up from that strange alternate reality. He took the first week to rest because he felt physically strange and exhausted, but then he started feeling bored and so he started working. It was strange, he didn’t have his memories back, but somehow his brain and hands still knew what they were doing.

He was slowly getting adjusted to this reality, accepting that it was his real life. The problem was that it didn’t feel like it.

He felt weird, he felt like a stranger in that scientific facility. People had meals three times a day in a canteen so they didn’t have to cook and he was usually sitting with Jimin and Yoongi, but he had a feeling that other people were often watching him. It didn’t feel like anyone really knew him here, or was it normal that everyone was so cold and distant?

He was trying to accept this life. Now that he knew he had spent two months in a simulation, the life he lived there with the husband and the dog suddenly looked incredibly fake and he couldn’t believe that when he was there, he didn’t actually see it.

But it still felt like he was supposed to live a different life, not be closed here in this building that was in the middle of the woods as Jimin revealed to him.

What made everything hard was the fact that he just couldn’t stop thinking about the dreams he had in that alternate reality. Jimin explained to him that they were fake as well, that it was just a counter-program to test how strong the main one was and how much it took for Taehyung’s brain to start questioning the reality and it sounded logical, it was a good test. But he couldn’t shake off the feeling that those dreams weren’t just dreams, it didn’t make sense for them to feel so real and so detailed when the main program was so limited. In those dream sequences, he has been to multiple places, he was outside and in a house and in a lab, while in the main program he was inside of the house the whole time.

But he started accepting the reality and he was telling himself that he only wished for those dreams to be real because they were so beautiful. Jeongguk seemed so nice and loving and what they had was beautiful and passionate and strong. They were married and even adopted children together and that was something Taehyung longed for deep down. In this reality, he didn’t have it though, in this reality, he was just a scientist without a social life, living in a closed-up space with other people, living and breathing only for work.

During day, when he was working, it was easy to just focus on whatever he was doing and not think about anything else. But when he was alone in his room in the evening and at night, he felt lonely and he wished almost every night to fall asleep and go to that dreamland where he would meet Jeongguk again. But two weeks have passed and that didn’t happen.

Until it did.

He was confused when he looked around and was standing in a lab. There wouldn’t be anything weird about it, but it wasn’t the lab that he has been working in lately, it was different.

It took him a while to realize that this was the lab that he was seeing in his dreams before, the lab where he saw Seokjin and Namjoon sometimes and where Jeongguk was coming to see him too.

His heart started beating faster and he was immediately filled with excitement, because he was back. He wished to have these dreams again and he did.

He was soon disappointed though, because he kept looking around and he kept waiting, but no one was coming. He was alone, just standing there in the white lab coat over his clothes.

Was this just some residue memory of the program he still had in his head? Did his brain remember those dream-like sequences and because he wished to go back for days, did his brain hear his wish and send him here?

He was startled when the door behind him opened. He was scared to turn around, but he did, he needed to see who it was.

His heart skipped a beat when he saw the familiar man with black hair and strong build. There wasn’t any annoying white light, he saw Jeongguk clearly and it felt so uplifting, it made him feel better than anything else in the past two weeks.

“Jeongguk,” he breathed out: “You are here.”

“Hey, baby, why am I not surprised that you are still here? I’ve been calling and texting, you are ignoring your phone again.”

“This is not real, is it?” Taehyung got out sadly, looking straight at Jeongguk, but he wasn’t looking back at him, not really. Taehyung realized that it was one of the usual moments when the man didn’t really see him, it was one of those moments where everything was happening like according to some script and Jeongguk wasn’t there to talk to him like he did the last time they saw each other.

“Can you hear me?” Taehyung asked just to be sure and when he got no answer, he knew what it meant.

It was frustrating, but he still felt happy that he was seeing Jeongguk again. So after short contemplation, he just decided to go with the flow and let the script happen like it was written. He just wanted to be with Jeongguk and enjoy the dream for as long as he could.

He turned around to face the table. There were some gadgets on it, probably something he was working on and then, without really meaning to, he said: “You know I have the phone on silent when I work.”

It was that strange feeling like someone was talking through his mouth, he didn’t really want to say those things, but he did and he couldn’t stop it. He didn’t want to though, he let the other Taehyung take over so he could just enjoy this beautiful life that was so much better than the one he lived.

“Let’s go to my place, it is late. We can order a take-out and cuddle before we go to sleep,” Jeongguk said as he came to the other from behind and hugged his waist. Taehyung’s eyes slipped to Jeongguk’s and then his hands – no rings. That meant that whatever these dreams were, they weren’t married yet and they didn’t even live together either since Jeongguk just said they should go to his place.

“I want to finish this,” Taehyung replied and when he looked down, he saw he was fiddling with one of the gadgets without even knowing it.

“You work too much,” Jeongguk sighed and then, to Taehyung’s surprise, started kissing his neck.

“It is not unusual for me to be here at this hour, you know I like working at night when no one is here, but what are you doing here so late?”

“Me and Hobi just returned from the job I told you about.”

“The job with the gang?”

“Yeah, gangsters tend to meet late and since we infiltrated them and are pretending to be the members until we find proofs that we need to arrest them, we gotta play along. I was trying to get in touch with you, but when you weren’t responding, I figured you would be here, so here I am,” Jeongguk hummed, continuing to kiss Taehyung’s neck playfully as his hands started roaming over his stomach and hips, caressing them sensually.

“W-what are you doing?” Taehyung got out weakly.

“Mm, I don’t know, what does it look like?”

“Jeongguk, I am working,” Taehyung whined.

“You can’t blame me, baby, you know I want you all the time,” the other whispered in his ear huskily as he stepped closer. Taehyung could feel his body against his backside, just that alone felt so good and it started having immediate effect on him.

“You are so horny,” he retorted, making Jeongguk bark out a laugh.

“I guess I still haven’t gotten enough of you,” he replied when he stopped laughing: “We have been going out for a few weeks and I want you more and more.”

“Jeongguk,” Taehyung got out, in half whisper, half whimper when the agent pushed his hips against his ass and he could feel clear arousal that was hiding in his pants.

“There are only night guards at this hour, don’t tell me you have never thought of fucking in the lab, I think it is hot.”

“There is a camera,” Taehyung pointed out, eyes slipping to the device in one corner of the ceiling that was aimed directly at them: “I am not opposed to experimentation, but exhibitionism isn’t anything I’d be into, I don’t wanna give the night guards a free show.”

“You’re right, I wouldn’t want anyone ogling you,” Jeongguk hummed, hands slipping under Taehyung’s t-shirt and touching the bare skin of his stomach as his hands continued roaming around. He added quietly: “I wouldn’t want anyone to see what you look like when I fuck you, how beautiful and desperate you are, that is something only I can see.”

Taehyung felt like he was losing his goddamn mind. He closed his eyes, enjoying the proximity of the other, more than happy to immerse himself in the dirty dream. He has had few dreams of Jeongguk fucking him before, and it always felt so good, he wasn’t opposed to experiencing it again. He didn’t care where and how it would happen either, it was a dream after all, he didn’t care about the damn camera.

But his dream self and Jeongguk obviously did, because Jeongguk suddenly said: “There are no cameras in that small kitchen over there.”

“Jeongguk-ah, we shouldn’t, it’s unprofessional to do this at work,” Taehyung protested without really meaning to, and it was clear that was what the ‘other Taehyung’ said.

“What is life without a little risk?” Jeongguk chuckled in his ear.

“You are like a devil on my shoulder, you are going to corrupt me.”

“Maybe, but at least I am a sexy devil.”

“Do you think so?” Taehyung teased.

“I know, at least that is how you see me and that is enough for me,” Jeongguk replied and started leading Taehyung towards the kitchen. The walk was slightly awkward since they were pressed together and Taehyung’s back was still to the other’s front, but neither of them cared enough to separate and walk normally, so they just wobbled to the kitchen counter.

He closed his eyes for a moment and when he opened them again, it was like someone pushed a flashforward button and ten or so minutes went by.

Now he was sitting on the tiny kitchen counter with the white coat and pants and underwear lying on the floor. His legs were wide open, Jeongguk was standing between them and fucking him.

“Oh fuck, go deeper,” Taehyung moaned, throwing his head back as he gripped Jeongguk’s shoulders for support. One of the agent’s arms was wrapped around his waist, securing him and at the same time holding him in an angle he could deliver his powerful thrusts perfectly.

“Aren’t you enjoying this too much for someone that didn’t want to do it here?” Jeongguk chuckled breathlessly before he leaned in and crushed their lips together in a messy, heated kiss.

“I-I said that you are going to corrupt me,” was all he could reply as they separated and Jeongguk started kissing his neck.

Taehyung closed his eyes and focused on the incredible sensation, it was almost insane just how perfect it felt when Jeongguk fucked him. He was just naturally so good, and even though they haven’t been apparently dating for very long, it felt like he knew all his sensitive spots and weaknesses.

“Ngh, I’m almost there, baby,” Taehyung moaned brokenly, feeling the heat pool in his stomach. Even though he was sure this wasn’t going on for very long – although he didn’t know for sure since the dream skipped some parts – he was very close to the edge. That was just an effect being with Jeongguk had on him.

“I’ve got you, angel,” Jeongguk said breathlessly and softly as he pulled back and looked at Taehyung with the gentlest smile. Taehyung felt a physical pain in his chest at that moment and he was fairly sure that this was the moment he knew he was deeply in love with Jeongguk and Jeongguk felt the same. This was the moment he knew that Jeongguk was the one and he never wanted them to be apart.

Taehyung felt like he was falling when the other wrapped a hand around his rock hard cock and he closed his eyes, ready to embrace the sweet, explosive height.

When he opened his eyes with a gasp, he was lying in a bed. For a moment, he was confused about where did Jeongguk and the laboratory go, but it started all coming back to him. He was never there, he was never with the black-haired man, he never left the bed and the scientific facility he called his home.

When he shifted, he felt uncomfortable stickiness in his pyjama bottoms. He didn’t have to investigate to know what happened, he had a wet dream and came in his pants like a teenager.

He sighed and looked out of the window, the sky was turning dark blue, it was just before sunrise.

He chuckled joylessly, thinking about how damn sad it was that all he had were wet dreams about a man that probably didn’t even exist. He was lonely and instead of living a proper life filled with love, he apparently dedicated it to science and work.

He was unable to stop thinking about the dream though, it just felt so real, and he was also sure that it wasn’t just a memory of something a program planted in his brain before. He didn’t believe that a program could ever come up with something so vivid and beautiful and he wasn’t thinking about the sex.

What he kept thinking about and what filled him with doubts about this life he was living was the look Jeongguk gave him shortly before he woke up. He could accept that his brain was able to imagine anything, even the most vivid and crazy and elaborated scenarios. But he refused to believe that his brain – however brilliant – would be able to show him something so real, deep and pure like the look Jeongguk gave him. That was something no brain or computer program could ever come up with and it couldn’t create the feeling he had in his chest when he saw the love in Jeongguk’s eyes, that was just too beautiful to be just an imagination.

Chapter Text

“Is something wrong?” Jimin asked with worry written all over his face as he watched Taehyung playing with the breakfast on his plate across from him. It has become a habit that they and Yoongi ate together, sometimes they were too busy to meet for lunch, but breakfasts and dinners, they usually spent them together in the facility’s cafeteria.

“It’s nothing,” Taehyung mumbled, looking at the scrambled eggs on the plate. When he came, he couldn’t wait to have them, but as he took a few bites, they tasted like ashes in his mouth.

“Doesn’t look like nothing, do you sleep well?” Jimin insisted. Over the past two weeks, they were spending quite a lot of time together, since he was the head of security and was tasked to watch over Taehyung. Yoongi worked with Taehyung a lot too, so all three of them were together a lot and Jimin couldn’t help it but create a bond with Taehyung already, because the slightly younger man was so likeable.

“Yeah, pretty well,” Taehyung reassured him, but then he sighed, put the chopsticks down and leaned back in the chair: “But I still keep having those dreams.”

“What dreams?” Yoongi asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Those that I had when I was plugged in that virtual reality,” Taehyung revealed: “It is damn confusing, I’ve been thinking about it, how come I still have them?”

“You mean those dreams you told me about? The dreams about, what was his name, Jeongguk?” Jimin wondered.

“Yeah,” the youngest nodded: “It doesn’t make any sense though, you said that it was just a counter-program to test the main one, right? I understand how I had those dreams when I was plugged, but why do I keep having them now?”

“Maybe you still remember them, it is normal to dream about stuff over and over again,” Jimin shrugged.

“But I never dream about the same thing, they are not just memories of those dreams I had while plugged to the device, those dreams are never the same, it is always something different.”

“Maybe it is just residue of the program,” Yoongi spoke, offering the fellow scientist some logical and scientific explanation since that was their world: “When you were still plugged, it might have uploaded a lot into your brain and even now when you are awake, it is coming to you, brain is complex, there is still so much we don’t understand about it and we never might.”

“I mean, that would make sense,” Taehyung hummed, because that sounded plausible. It wasn’t far-fetched to assume that the counter-program uploaded more information into his brain and it was still coming back to him when his brain was in the most vulnerable and relaxed state while he was sleeping.

They were quiet for a while, but Taehyung was still clearly in deep thought, looking down on the eggs with a little frown. Jimin shortly glanced at Yoongi, knowing they both thought the same thing – Taehyung was highly intelligent, there was a reason why the company wanted him, he was one of the biggest geniuses in the country, so it was not surprising that he was overthinking and doubting, it was in his nature. But they had to make sure that he didn’t discover what was going on, powerful people wanted Taehyung on their side for their projects and him asking questions was not good.

“There is one thing that I don’t understand and I keep thinking about it,” Taehyung spoke again after a while.

“What is it?” Jimin encouraged him to speak.

“The main program, the one where I lived with that husband and the dog was full of flaws. Sure, it tricked my brain at first, nothing seemed strange, but when I finally started doubting, it became painfully obviously that everything was weird. I didn’t even know the guy’s or the dog’s names, I never went outside, I lived every day pretty much the same.”

“You said it yourself even before the experiment that it was far from perfect,” Yoongi pointed out.

“Yes, which is why it doesn’t make any damn sense why that counter-program that was supposed to test me and see how long it takes me to realize that I was in a simulation was so much better than the main one,” Taehyung argued: “That world when I thought I was sleeping and dreaming was so much more detailed and in many ways almost perfect. It wasn’t repetitive and it felt so…so real, Jeongguk felt so real.”

“Taehyung-ah, I understand that it is all still confusing,” Jimin said with a sympathetic smile, putting a comforting hand on Taehyung’s: “I can’t even imagine being put through that, being awake now must feel so weird and it is normal that you are thinking about it and that many things don’t make sense. I am not a scientist so I am the last person to lecture you, but isn’t all of this normal? Isn't that what new inventions and science is about, about trying to understand things?”

“It is,” Taehyung nodded.

“I think what you need to do is to just try to focus on work and on the real world and, well, if you still keep dreaming about Jeongguk then that is fine, but don’t forget that they are nothing more than dreams.”

“It’s just…they are so nice, you know?” the younger mumbled, looking away because he felt slightly embarrassed, but he still continued: “I love science and I love working but…I can’t describe it, but what I do here and how I live, it just doesn’t feel right. I wake up and eat here with you and then I work all day and then return to my room and I am alone.”

“I suppose it is nice to dream about someone that cares about you,” Jimin nodded in understanding.

“That life I seem to have there when I sleep, it is so beautiful,” Taehyung admitted with a sigh, meeting eyes with Jimin: “The kids, Jiminie, you should see them, they are gorgeous. And Jeongguk…he is like a perfect guy, so loving and caring and kind and funny and…he just makes me feel so special.”

“That sounds wonderful, but like I said, don’t forget that none of it is real,” Jimin said, looking Taehyung straight in the eyes.

They were both slightly startled when Yoongi suddenly put his chopsticks down and stood up.

“Where are you going?” Jimin asked.

“I am not hungry anymore, I am just gonna go to the lab,” the elder replied and walked away.

“What was that about?” Taehyung frowned in confusion at Jimin.

“He can be grumpy sometimes, don’t try to understand it, I have been with him for years and I still don’t,” Jimin said with a dismissive chuckle: “Anyway, I gotta go too, the boss wanted to see me, I’ll see you around.”

With that, he left slightly confused Taehyung in the cafeteria and walked out quickly, heading to his and Yoongi’s room because he knew that the elder didn’t go to the lab.

“What the hell was that?” he hissed as soon as he entered and closed the door behind him.

“I just couldn’t listen to more of that bullshit,” Yoongi retorted.

“What bullshit?”

“It seems like lying to him is almost too easy for you.”

“It is not easy at all,” Jimin protested: “But I don’t have any other choice.”

“He is a good guy,” Yoongi sighed: “I work with him every day and I really like him and all this lying is starting to piss me off. We are holding him here against his will, we are keeping him away from his friends and family, from his fucking husband and kids!”

“Not so loudly!” Jimin hissed.

“It’s just not right, Jimin,” the elder frowned: “This is inhumane and it is not what I signed up for when I started working here, I don’t wanna participate on keeping someone a prisoner, and it is the serum I developed that is preventing him from remembering, so it is my fault.”

“It is not your fault, you had no choice, we have to follow the orders,” Jimin said grimly: “You know just as well as I do that if you try to go against them, it doesn’t end well. Would you want to disappear like all those people that have over the years?”

“Of course not.”

“Then we have to play by their rules and do whatever they want. I hate this as much as you do, but it is what I have to do.”

“Where do we draw the line though?” Yoongi said seriously: “When are we gonna come to the point when we say that enough is enough?”

“I don’t know,” the younger sighed, wondering the same thing. To what lengths was he going to be forced to go to disregard another human being’s life like this? Was he willing to go that far and lose his principles and lose himself for people that were chasing after fame and power?

*

The continuing dreams were driving Taehyung crazy, but after a while, he just decided to embrace them and enjoy them. His real life seemed quite bleak, there was really nothing exciting, just work that he enjoyed, but there was nothing else. So when he went to sleep and appeared in the dream world with Jeongguk, it was a nice escape from reality.

When he fell asleep and woke up in yet another dream, the first thing he heard was sound of waves and when he opened his eyes, he saw that he was on a beach. It was really strange, because he could literally smell the salt, he could feel the breeze and the heat, it was remarkable just how detailed his brain made everything. He could even feel the heat of the sun, despite lying under a sun umbrella, but what especially stood out was that he felt so comfy, his head was lying on something that was both soft and hard and he felt fingers stroking through his hair, giving his head a light massage.

He looked up and smiled when he saw Jeongguk, finally realizing that he was laying his head on the man’s lap and it was his hand that was gently stroking his head. Jeongguk just looked down and smiled back at him and his eyes were filled with fondness and love that Taehyung became familiar with over the weeks of having these dreams. He couldn’t believe that he or anyone else could ever create a program that could create something like this, something that looked so deep and pure, something Taehyung always imagined true love looked and felt like.

He closed his eyes and let himself enjoy the moment of absolute peace and happiness he felt, because he knew that sooner or later, he was going to wake up in the bed in the complex with no windows and he was going to go to breakfast and then work until evening like every day.

“I don’t even care if this is real or not anymore,” he said out loud, surprised that those words actually came out of his mouth since in ninety percent of cases, it was the other Taehyung speaking, it was the other Taehyung that did or said things without him really having any control over it, but there were these rare occasions when he could actually say something.

“My life here seems so much better than the one I have for real,” he sighed, not really talking to anyone in particular since he knew that Jeongguk couldn’t hear him, Taehyung doubted that he would be so lucky to have the other talk back to him like he has on those few occasions, that was before though, that was when he was still plugged to his own invention.

“Maybe this is just my subconsciousness giving me what I’ve always wanted,” he continued, knowing that he could say anything he wanted: “Maybe I am so desperately lonely that I made up this beautiful life where I met you and we got married and adopted kids, because my real life sucks.”

He chuckled bitterly, feeling suddenly choked up and his chest got tight.

“This will sound fucking insane but…I feel like I miss you so much,” he got out with slight difficulties, talking to Jeongguk but not looking at him: “Somewhere deep down, I miss you, but how can I miss something or someone that I never had in the first place? How can I miss someone that is not real?”

“I am real.”

Taehyung froze, hesitantly opening his eyes and looking up just to meet Jeongguk’s eyes and they weren’t glazed over like usually, he was looking at him like he was really seeing him.

“I have no idea what they did to you and what they are still doing, angel,” Jeongguk continued: “But I am real, everything you have seen and felt is real and I miss you too, so much you can’t even imagine. I have tried to reach you for a while and I think I finally succeeded because you called for me, you spoke to me just now and wanted me to respond.”

“Stop it,” Taehyung whined, sitting up with his back to the other, wrapping arms around his legs: “This is not real, I am sleeping and it is either still the fucking program or I am dreaming, either way, it is just happening in my head.”

“It is, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not real and that it didn’t happen,” Jeongguk moved closer and Taehyung closed his eyes, feeling tears rolling down his cheeks when the other kissed his neck.

“I remember this day, we went on vacation on our first year anniversary and we spent the whole day at this beach,” Jeongguk added.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Taehyung sobbed, covering his eyes with the palms, feeling like he was breaking down.

“You have to continue fighting, you can’t give in and believe the bullshit that they feed you, wherever you are, you don’t belong there,” Jeongguk said urgently: “You belong with me and our kids and our friends, don’t trust anything they tell you, don’t trust anyone, even those that might seem like good people.”

Taehyung shook his head with a sob, he was so fucking confused and tired and it was becoming too much, the fact that he still didn’t remember anything of his life before he woke up in the hospital bed plugged to that damn machine wasn’t helping.

“Be careful and cautious, pay attention to everything and everyone around you, you are the smartest person I know, you will realize and figure out what is really going on and I will find you. I never stopped looking for you, baby, and I never will, you just have to hold on,” Jeongguk added, but his voice was becoming weaker like it was coming from a big distance and Taehyung could see from the corner of his eye that there was the familiar white light shining behind him and that told him that Jeongguk was disappearing. The light eventually disappeared and then it was quiet, he could only hear the waves of the sea and his own quiet sobs and despite being happy that Jeongguk actually talked to him, it just made him even more desperate and confused.

*

It took Taehyung about a month to even find out how the device that he supposedly invented even worked, because of his memory loss, he had to essentially take it apart and start from the beginning. His memories still haven’t come back, which was weird, but it seemed like his hands and his mind knew what they were doing, at least when it came to his expertise.

It was just a bit before dinner time and he was in the lab just like every day, working with Yoongi on the microchip technology that the company was hoping to develop and be able to sell. Yoongi explained to him all the technicalities and it was honestly really impressive, but the more Taehyung learned about this thing, the less he liked it. He was a firm believer in free will and he didn’t like anything that could be used against people to brainwash them. His own device could already become a dangerous weapon if the wrong people got their hands on it, but people still needed to be physically plugged to it. Microchips were different, more dangerous, because they could be implanted once and people could be controlled and he didn’t believe that they lived in a world that was good enough for such technology to not be misused.

He hissed and dropped his forehead in his palm and he leaned against the stainless steel table as sharp pain shot through his head.

“What’s wrong?” Yoongi asked worriedly, frowning.

“N-nothing,” Taehyung got out, taking a couple of deep breaths until the pain got smaller and he looked up: “I just have been having these headaches lately, they are constant, mostly dull, but sometimes there is this sharp pain.”

“That could be a sign of something bad,” the elder pointed out.

“Might be just a side effect of me being plugged to an experimental technology for weeks.”

“Yes and that is the reason why you should get a proper medical check-up, we cannot know what that thing did to your neurological system.”

“They ran thorough tests after I woke up.”

“And they should run them again, some things and some damage can show later.”

“I guess it can’t hurt to see a doctor,” the younger sighed.

“You do that,” Yoongi nodded: “Besides the headaches, have you had any other problems?”

“Well, it takes long for me to fall asleep and sometimes I am having these panic-like symptoms when I finally manage to relax enough and start falling asleep,” Taehyung admitted: “And…few times I felt really disoriented, like I suddenly didn’t know where I was or why I came somewhere and it took a minute or two for me to remember and calm down. I guess that is connected to the memory loss.”

“Yeah, probably,” Yoongi nodded, but even as Taehyung started working again, he kept watching him and thinking, having a bad feeling in his stomach.

After dinner, when Yoongi came to his and Jimin’s bedroom, he told the younger about the incident in the lab and about Taehyung’s problems.

“You were right when you told him it might be side effects of his thingy,” Jimin commented when he heard everything.

“Or it might be the serum I developed and that they are injecting him with every damn morning after breakfast,” Yoongi grumbled, sitting down on the sofa with a heavy sigh.

“If that’s the case, it is not your fault,” Jimin said, sitting down next to the other and rubbing his leg comfortingly.

“It is though, because I made it,” Yoongi protested: “And sure, I was ordered to keep making it and provide it for the nurse to give it to him, but it is experimental, it was never properly tested, I didn’t even manage to run any trials on mice and they immediately gave it to a human with one of the most brilliant brains without knowing how it can fuck him up.”

“It is not your fault,” the younger repeated.

“I am sure it must be connected to my serum, when he talked about the disorientation, that especially concerns me, that serum is keeping him from remembering so it is effecting the part of brain where memories are stored, so far it’s been working on his long term memory, but what if it will affect him in other ways too? I don’t want the kid to get hurt, he is a good person.”

“I definitely agree with that,” Jimin sighed, leaning back: “The longer and the better I know him, the more I like him and no one deserves this. He has no clue about his life, we fed him bunch of bullshit about living and working here, when he was forcefully kidnapped and taken from his loved-ones.”

“Not that long ago, you were saying that we have to do what we are told,” Yoongi raised an eyebrow: “Have you had a change of heart?”

“Maybe a little,” Jimin nodded: “I never signed up to do illegal shit like this, kidnapping and holding people against their will and messing with their brains, that is fucked up on so many levels and all in the name of progress and money, because they want to develop their big inventions first.”

“We might not be able to get him out,” Yoongi said slowly and quietly: “But I am still the only one that knows how to make that serum so…I might make it less strong.”

Jimin bit his lip: “We could get in a lot of trouble.”

“Maybe it is worth it if it saves our conscience, sometimes risking is better than to sell your soul.”

“I don’t want him to suffer and if you say that he has some medical issues, that might lead to bigger problems soon,” Jimin said, looking suddenly determined: “No one deserves to be treated like this and be kept prisoner in their own mind, especially not someone as good as Taehyung.”

*

Taehyung went to see the main doctor of the facility and she ran tests again. When he went to see her again for results, she told him that he was fine and that there were no anomalies, but something about her face told Taehyung that she was lying and that she actually found something abnormal. But if that was the case, why didn’t she want to tell him and start an appropriate treatment?

It just made him more paranoid and he kept thinking about the dream from a few days ago, the dream of the beach where Jeongguk directly talked to him and urged him to trust no one and to look around for clues. Jeongguk believed in him, he believed that Taehyung was smart enough to figure it out even with his messed up head and memories, so Taehyung thought that he had to at least give it a try, because he had a feeling that there was something shady going on and that no one was sincere with him, not even Jimin and Yoongi who were supposedly his friends and who were treating him nicely.

He continued working as he was told, but he started paying more attention to people and things around him.

It was one day when he was alone in the lab that he noticed something that was definitely strange. He decided to take a little break from working because his eyes were tired and he felt another headache creeping on him, so he just sat back and put everything down.

His eyes landed on the photo frame on the table, the one he saw the first day he was walking around with Jimin. It was a photo of him and Jimin and Yoongi, that’s when Jimin told him that they were close friends, and Taehyung never really looked twice at the photo, but now that he was looking at it, something seemed off.

He grabbed the frame and brought it closer to examine it. It was a photo of them in front of a concrete wall, there were not really any details to tell him more about surroundings, but he supposed it could be this building from the outside, he wouldn’t know because he never left the inside.

The photo looked strange though, it looked like their faces didn’t match their bodies, it was like someone photoshopped the picture. He frowned when he realized that Yoongi was as tall as him, but unless he was standing on something, that was impossible. Yoongi and Jimin were about the same height, they were several centimetres shorter than him, yet here the eldest looked taller than Jimin. Was this photo not real? Who would have a reason to put a fake photo in his lab? Was it to convince him that he belonged here and that he and Yoongi and Jimin were close when they really weren’t? Was this done to make him trust the two men?

He noticed another strange thing one evening in his bedroom. He was just lying on the bed, reading a book since that was pretty much the only thing he could do in his spare time to kill some time when he noticed something on his ring finger.

He put the book down and brought the hand under the lamp on the bedside table, gulping when he realized that there seemed to be a part of his skin that was slightly lighter than the rest. The part was between two knuckles, maybe one centimetre thick, and it wrapped around the whole finger. His mind went instantly to the ring he kept seeing in his dreams, it became a habit to always check his finger to see if the ring was there or not and this little piece of lighter skin made him think about it. Did he use to wear a ring? Where was it now though? He previously went through his personal belongings here in the room since he didn’t really remember anything in hopes of remembering and he didn’t find any piece of jewellery apart from a simple silver necklace and a watch. If he was wearing a ring before, where was it now? And was it just a normal ring or was it a wedding band?

He leaned back and sighed, thinking about all the dreams and everything Jeongguk had told him when he spoke directly to him. The black-haired man was trying to convince him that he was not dreaming, he told him that what Taehyung kept seeing were memories, he claimed that they were married with children and that Taehyung was kidnapped and held against his will. But if he was kidnapped, would he be allowed to wander around freely?

He didn’t really remember anything from before he woke up in that bed, he only remembered that virtual reality, but what life did he lead before? Where did he grow up, where were his parents, did he have any siblings? What school did he go to, how many friends did he have, when did he get his doctorate in science? Has he ever dated and loved anyone? All those questions were rising in his head but he couldn’t find the answer. Was it possible that his mind was trying to make him remember when he was sleeping and his mind wasn’t occupied with work and reality? Was everything he saw a window to his past instead of the counter-program that Jimin and Yoongi claimed the dreams to be? And what role did the two of them play in this? Were they lying to him, were they actually his enemies? He didn’t have a bad feeling about them, he could tell that they were good people, but did that mean that they were sincere with him?

He rubbed his temples, feeling another headache coming and he knew it was for the better to stop thinking so much. Trying to remember and being stressed just always seemed to make it worse, just the other day, he nearly threw up from the migraine he had, it was so bad he had to excuse himself from work and come here to rest.

He grabbed the Bluetooth earbuds and then his phone, going to the music app to put on some relaxing music that always seemed to help, he had to stop thinking and trying to remember. Was that perhaps intentional too? Were the headaches preventing him from remembering, was he being held a prisoner not behind bars but by his own mind?

Chapter Text

It was one of those dreams where he was just a silent observer, he was in the body of the dream Taehyung, but he couldn’t do anything and he couldn’t talk, it was the dream Taehyung that had control over the words and actions. But Taehyung didn’t really mind that much, especially because of what was about to happen.

“I can’t believe that we passed,” he said, turning his head to look at Jeongguk. They were in a car, Jeongguk was driving while he was sitting in the passenger seat and the car was moving on a highway. He saw a city landscape when he looked out of the window, but his brain that suffered the memory loss couldn’t recognize the place.

“It was a long process, I am glad it is over,” Jeongguk sighed.

“It was worth it though, it is finally happening,” the dream Taehyung replied and the Taehyung in his body wondered what was happening, he could just tell that they were both slightly nervous and tense, but at the same time giddy and excited.

“We both have good jobs, we have savings, we are good candidates for adoption,” Jeongguk replied and that made Taehyung finally understand what they were even talking about.

“I always wanted my own family, when I realized that I was gay, I thought that dream was over,” Taehyung said: “So when the law about same sex couples and adoption was passed, I couldn’t believe it.”

“I feel the same.”

“And we are finally going to meet them, I just wish we could take them home immediately, I already know that I won’t be able to leave them.”

“We still need to sign some papers and it is for the best that they stay in the hospital for now, they were premature, they need proper healthcare to be strong and healthy,” Jeongguk argued with a soft smile.

“You are right,” Taehyung hummed.

It took only a few minutes that were spent in comfortable and giddy silence for them to arrive to a hospital. Taehyung didn’t really pay attention to anything around him, he wasn’t looking for any clues to see where they were, he couldn’t really focus or care about anything else when he knew that this was a dream about them meeting their adorable twins for the first time.

He worked on autopilot and let the dream Taehyung guide him as he and Jeongguk entered the hospital and went to the reception and then to some office. He wasn’t paying much attention to what the doctor and the lawyer that they met were saying, none of that mattered anyway.

What mattered and when he became focused was when they finally led them to a little private room with a sofa and told them to sit down and wait. Neither of them sat, they were too excited to wait patiently, so they were just marching around the room without talking.

They both turned around when the door finally opened and a nurse came in with a hospital baby bed on wheels. He held his breath as she came closer and finally stopped in front of them and he saw the two tiny bundles wrapped in blankets, sleeping.

His chest instantly became tight when he lay his eyes on his children for the first time, they were adopting them, but to Taehyung, they were already his and he already knew that he was going to love them and care for them for the rest of his life.

“They are beautiful,” Jeongguk whispered, standing behind him and squeezing his shoulders and Taehyung felt tears on his face, overwhelmed with emotions.

“You can hold them if you want,” the nurse smiled at the couple.

“Yes, of course,” Jeongguk replied for both of them since Taehyung was at a complete loss of words.

Only a minute later, Taehyung was holding the tiny baby dressed in pink while the boy in blue was almost getting lost in Jeongguk’s big arms. For a moment, Taehyung was looking at his husband with the tiny human, feeling so much love he thought he might burst.

Then he looked down at the girl, gulping through the lump in his throat when she yawned with her little mouth. She was so gorgeous, so perfect, so amazing and so his and he felt such a strong surge of emotions rush through him, it was unlike anything he felt ever before, it was so powerful and so real and at that moment, he was absolutely sure that this couldn’t be a simple dream or a program created by a computer, because what he felt was so pure, no computer or the most brilliant brain on earth could have ever come up with it.

He woke up in the familiar grey room, feeling tears on his face. He shortly glanced at the clock, noting that it was just four in the morning, but he knew that he wasn’t going to be able to sleep anymore. He was just thinking about the twins and the moment he held the girl and then the boy for the first time. He was thinking about watching Jeongguk and his fond, love-filled gaze that made it clear that he decided to protect the babies from anything bad.

And Taehyung…he was convinced that all three of them were real, it was hard to accept the harsh reality, because that meant that he really was kidnapped and held against his will away from his family, but at the same time, having that realization also made him feel light because that meant that he had something beautiful waiting for him outside.

He just couldn’t comprehend what technology would ever be able to make him forget about the man he loved more than anything in the world and about their children that they were raising together and that Taehyung saw in the previous dreams have grown up into lively and healthy toddlers. And what he especially couldn’t comprehend was what monsters would ever want to separate him from his family and make him believe that he had nothing and no one? Why did they kidnap him and what did they want from him? He knew that it had something to do with that microchip and his own technology and he would be damned if he continued helping those fuckers in destroying free will and humanity.

*

After that dream of holding the twins for the first time, Taehyung was convinced that this life in the facility wasn’t his life. He was supposed to live a different life, one with a loving husband and gorgeous kids, not working every day from dawn till dusk. He still hasn’t gotten his memories back, but he knew that he loved his job. He knew that he loved thinking and inventing, but he knew that work wasn’t everything he had. He knew that somewhere out there, there were people that loved him and that he loved back just as much, not just his husband and kids, but also his friends that he has seen in some of the dreams.

So he decided to go on a mission, he was determined to find out what was really going on and where he was, he was determined to get confirmation that he was being held here against his will and he understood that it was because of his expertise.

He started lurking around and he paid attention to everything, every little detail could be important and show him that he was, in fact, a prisoner. He had no idea what he was going to do once he found out, because he was sure that escaping wasn’t going to be easy, but he decided to take it one step at the time. First, he needed to really get to know his surroundings and people and find some proof that he didn’t belong there.

He quite liked Jimin and Yoongi, they have been both nothing but nice to him, but he knew that sharing anything with them might be dangerous. It hurt to know that these people that were pretending to be his friends were lying to him, he knew that he couldn’t really trust them, so he didn’t talk about his dreams or doubts anymore and pretended like everything was fine.

He kept seeing Mr. Choi every now and then, understanding that he was the boss of the facility. He just had no idea what this facility was, was it part of the government or was it a private organization? And who was really in the lead? Because Taehyung doubted that Mr. Choi was the big boss, he surely wasn’t behind everything.

He knew where Mr. Choi’s office was, he kept seeing him coming in and leaving and he was sure that he could find something in that office, but he needed the key card. He owned one and it unlocked most of the doors for him to freely move around the facility, but he was sure that Mr. Choi’s office was out of reach.

He knew it was very risky, but he decided to steal the boss’ card and take a look around. It turned out to be quite easy, he got the opportunity one day when Mr. Choi came to the lab to check on him and ask him and Yoongi if they had made any progress on connecting the microchip to Taehyung’s technology.

Taehyung spotted the key card, just hanging on a thread from Mr. Choi’s suit pocket – everyone had their cards on those threads, most people just wore them around their necks – and when the man was distracted, talking to Yoongi and Taehyung was standing next to him, taking the card and putting it in the pocket of his lab coat wasn’t hard.

“I need to take a bathroom break and eat a bit of something,” he told Yoongi when Mr. Choi left and Taehyung was praying to all the gods above that the man wasn’t going directly to his office, because he would have noticed immediately that his card was missing.

“Yeah, that is probably a good idea,” Yoongi nodded: “You still keep having those headaches, you never say it, but I can see it. So go eat and drink something, I am sure it helps.”

“Do you want to bring something?”

“Maybe just some fruit.”

“Okay, I’ll be right back,” the younger nodded, holding the stolen key card in his pocket as he gave Yoongi an innocent smile and left the lab.

He rushed through the hallway, thankful that Mr. Choi’s office was not far from here, so he didn’t look suspicious. There were guards, here and there, the ones that Jimin was the head of, and Taehyung was always wondering why there was any need for guards to be inside. He understood that they might want to protect the facility from the outside, but why here? Was it possible that he was not the only person against his will here? Were these guards tasked to watch people and maybe even eliminate them if they started making trouble?

His heart was hammering in his chest when he finally approached the door of the office, looking around to make sure that he was alone. He put the card to the little box on the wall and watched red light turn into green and then he took the handle.

He slipped inside and closed the door, quickly looking around. The office was nothing special, just a small room without windows, a desk and a couple of bookshelves.

Taehyung honestly had no idea what he was even looking for and what he was hoping to find. He knew that the chances of him finding some folder about him were almost non-existent since at this day and age, everything was stored in computers.

He still went to the desk and opened the drawers one by one, but he didn’t find anything strange, apart from a small handgun, but Mr. Choi probably had it for protection. The computer on the desk was, of course, unlogged and there was no way for Taehyung to guess the password.

He sighed, thinking that his little mission impossible was going to be futile, but then his eyes landed on a little book on the desk, it looked like a journal or a diary. He took it and opened it, holding his breath when his eyes quickly scanned one page and his name caught his attention.

‘As we expected, it was just a matter of time before Taehyung would wake up, it was still a success that we managed to keep him in for weeks,’ Taehyung read silently in his head and even though the sentence was quite simple, it felt eerie. It was disturbing that Mr. Choi could write so causally about holding him hostage in his own brain that was plugged to a program that made him forget about the real world.

He turned a couple of pages until he found his name again and read.

‘I believe that Taehyung will be important for our programme, although without his memories, everything is slower. It is necessary to keep giving him the serum though, because without it he would not be so willing to help.’

Taehyung frowned, feeling something heavy settling in his stomach. What serum was Mr. Choi talking about? And why would he not be willing to help if he was a part of this team, as everyone was trying to convince him?

He turned a couple of pages and his heart nearly stopped when he read the following sentences.

‘Thanks to our intelligence, we know that they are looking for him. Thankfully we have no information that they would be on the right track, so finding the facility is very unlikely. We still need to be careful and watch out for any signs of them coming for TH, from the information I have from reliable sources, it appears that JJK is trying to communicate with TH, most likely using the same neurotechnology that TH has developed.’

Taehyung felt like he was hit in the face with a brick. He let the words sink in and understand what they meant. There was someone out there that was looking for him, although without success for now. There was also someone close to him that told Mr. Choi that someone has been trying to communicate with Taehyung in his dreams – those informants were most likely Jimin and Yoongi, since he hasn’t talked about it with anyone else.

His eyes returned to the text, landing on the three letters and he was staring at them. JJK.

At first his brain didn’t make the connection, but then it hit him. JJK. JJK as in Jeon Jeongguk. Jeon Jeongguk was looking for him and that meant that Jeon Jeongguk was real.

Taehyung felt an outburst of happiness and relief, because for the first time in weeks, he got a physical and written confirmation that the man he has been dreaming about and even talking to a couple of times was real and he wasn’t just a product of a computer program or his brain. Jeon Jeongguk was out there and he was looking for him and he was really communicating with him, using the same technology that Taehyung developed. He was out there and he hadn't given up on Taehyung, because Jeongguk loved Taehyung, because they were husbands and they had two beautiful kids.

He felt happy and relieved and hopeful, but at the same time angry and betrayed, because despite not finding out anything specific here, those few sentences he read were enough of a proof that everything that Jeongguk told him was true. He was kidnapped and he was held a hostage here, away from his real, beautiful life. But what was the serum that Mr. Choi mentioned? Taehyung was sure that there would be something written in the journal about it, but he couldn’t risk staying any longer, not knowing when the man would notice that his key card was missing.

So for now, he had to be content with what he found out and leave.

He opened the door to a crack, looking out to the corridor carefully to make sure there were no guards or other people in the vicinity. When he was sure that he was alone, he quickly walked out and locked the door, marching quickly back towards the lab, letting the thread with the key fall from his fingers and onto the floor, hoping that Mr. Choi was going to think that it just fell out of his pocket when he was leaving the office.

He returned to the lab, breathing slightly faster than normally, thankful that he made it back. One look at Yoongi made him feel angry though, the man was just standing there, working, and Taehyung hated it that he was just so casual while lying to him on a daily basis. He knew that he had to keep his emotions in check though, he couldn’t let anything show, otherwise god knows what they would do to him.

So he just took a deep breath and walked to the table where the elder was working and joined him.

“You didn’t bring anything?” Yoongi eyed him.

“What?”

“I told you to bring me some fruit.”

“Oh, right,” Taehyung got out, eyes widening a little as he remembered that he came back empty handed and that was suspicious. Thankfully his genius brain was obviously good for more than work, so he made up a quick, plausible lie.

“Sorry, I went to the bathroom first, but then I got another one of those migraines so I stayed there until it passed and I wasn’t hungry anymore. And I completely forgot about you, that damn pain is messing with my head.”

“It’s fine, I am not that hungry anyway,” Yoongi nodded, giving him a sympathetic smile that looked sincere: “I suppose the pain gets bad sometimes, it’s not weird that it makes you forgetful or slightly disoriented. You should go see a doctor again if it’s not getting better.”

“I am fine, I will go to the doctor if it gets worse, I promise,” the younger reassured him and he wondered if Yoongi’s care was genuine or not, but it seemed like it was. He didn’t know what to make of it though, because now he knew for sure that Yoongi and Jimin and everyone else around here was lying to him, so why would the scientist even care how he was doing?

*

Taehyung knew for sure that these people he was surrounded with didn’t have good intentions when one day, two men in uniforms came in the laboratory with Mr. Choi. He served in the military like all Korean men, but he was sure it was a long time ago and he still didn’t really remember much of his past, but he was certain that one of the two soldiers was high ranking.

Mr. Choi introduced him and Yoongi and they both bowed.

“We have come to see if there has been any progress in the technology,” the lower rank said.

“I am sure you read my reports about Dr. Kim here that was testing the technology,” Mr. Choi said, reminding Taehyung of the weeks he spent in bed while plugged to the machine that made him think he was living a completely different life.

“Yes, we’ve read everything,” the higher-ranking man said: “It impressed me, I am not going to lie and even though I understood that it was far from perfect and there is still a lot to work on, it seems like it is a breakthrough technology.”

“Dr. Kim is the best of the best,” Mr. Choi nodded and Taehyung might have thought that he was even proud of him if he didn’t know that he was a bad guy.

“We could find use for the little machine,” the soldier said: “It could be useful during training, but it would be much better in combination with the microchip.”

“We are still working on that, sir,” Yoongi spoke: “I don’t want to disappoint you, but I don’t think we are anywhere close for the microchip to be really used, it will probably take years.”

“There are many people that it can be tested on in the army.”

“With all due respect, I am not sure how I feel about making soldiers your guinea pigs,” Taehyung spoke coldly, looking at the man: “And I am not sure I want the army to get their hands on this kind of technology.”

“Who else than the army could have a use for it?” the man replied with hard eyes.

“Schools, for starters,” Taehyung retorted: “It would be amazing and incredibly useful if doctors or firefighters could train in a safe environment and later they would use it to save lives.”

“You don’t think the army saves lives?”

“In my observation, the army usually takes them.”

“Dr. Kim is sceptical, and I understand that, but don’t worry, he is committed,” Mr. Choi jumped in.

“You don’t really have a choice in that matter, Dr. Kim,” the soldier said, taking a step towards the scientist: “You are an inventor and I admire you for that, you must be very smart, but at the end of the day, scientists do not decide how their inventions are going to be used, do they?”

“Maybe they should,” Taehyung said, glaring at the man.

“Let’s go take a look around the facility, there are more labs where we are developing new technologies, you will be interested in those,” Mr. Choi said: “But first, I am sure you are hungry as it is a lunch time, Jimin will take you to the canteen.”

As if on call, Jimin walked through the door and invited the soldiers to follow him, Mr. Choi didn’t go with them though, he just watched them leave and when they were gone, he turned to Taehyung with a cold and angry expression on his face.

“Dr. Kim, I don’t appreciate you talking like that to our guests.”

“Your bosses you mean?” Taehyung retorted, starting to feel angry as well. He has said nothing until now, he knew it was better for his safety, he had no idea what these people might do to him if he revealed that he knew he was imprisoned, that he knew the truth, but he was reaching his breaking point.

“We don’t work for the army, they are our customers, as many,” Mr. Choi replied: “But we might lose them if you keep talking like this, you can’t just tell them that you don’t want the army to use our technology.”

“You mean my technology!” Taehyung snapped: “I don’t remember anything and I don’t know why, but you said it yourself, that thing I was plugged to is my invention and you are just using me to work on it so you can profit from it. I don’t want to participate on anything that could bring harm to millions of people around the world, I don’t want politicians or the army to have this kind of technology that can turn people into dumb sheep, that can plug them into a virtual reality and hold them imprisoned like you did with me!”

“You yourself wanted to test that technology-“

“I know that is a lie!” Taehyung yelled, finally erupting. He couldn’t help it, he was done.

“I didn’t volunteer to have weeks of my life stolen to lie in a bed and live in a reality that just fucked up my head!” he went off: “I never wanted to work for you, I don’t remember much and I know that is your doing too, somehow, but I do know that I don’t belong here, you hold me here against my will when there are people out there that matter to me. How far are you willing to go for money and fame? Is kidnapping people and brainwashing them alright to you? If so then I don’t want to have anything to do with you and this facility and anyone around here.”

“Taehyung-“ Yoongi stepped to the other, putting a hand on his shoulder, but Taehyung shrugged it off and stepped away.

“Don’t touch me, I know you are in on it too!” the younger snapped at the elder scientist: “You all lie to me, you act like we are colleagues and even friends when that is not the case.”

Taehyung was panting as he stopped with the rant, it felt good to finally let it out, but he also knew that it was not going to be without consequences.

“You know a lot,” Mr. Choi spoke and his voice was menacingly quiet: “I don’t know how much you know and how it happened, but it is a shame, because I was hoping you could work for us. Maybe you could still help us in some ways, just not here in the lab.”

“What does that mean?” Taehyung glared at him.

“It is clear that you are not going to help voluntarily, fortunately there are methods that can make you help us, maybe a little confinement will make you change your mind.”

“So you are going to lock me up?” Taehyung scoffed: “Well, go on, you already hold me here without a chance for me to leave, you might as well imprison me for real, because I am telling you here and now that I am not going to continue doing anything for you, I am not going to continue with the research, I am not going to help you connect my technology to that damn microchip so you can put it in people’s bodies.”

“Very well,” the boss said coldly.

“Mr. Choi, I don’t think there is a need-“ Yoongi tried to protest.

“If Taehyung wants this, he shall have it.”

Taehyung watched the man take out a radio from his pocket, calling Jimin with a few other guards. He was scared of what was going to happen, on the outside he appeared to be a lot calmer and braver than what he felt on the inside, but the defiance felt good, he couldn’t lie.

He watched as the door opened and Jimin and three other men walked in.

“Did you call, boss?” Jimin turned to Mr. Choi.

“It appears that we will have to get to another part of our plan,” the man in the suit said: “Dr. Kim here is not willing to participate in our research and who are we to force him?”

Jimin’s eyes flickered to Taehyung, there was a bit of fear and worry in them and Taehyung could tell that he wasn’t happy about this plan, whatever it was.

“Take Dr. Kim back to the hospital room, he is very familiar with that,” Mr. Choi ordered and then turned to Yoongi: “Bring the machine, Dr. Min, you know what to do.”

Taehyung watched the fellow scientist nod hesitantly and then walk to the machine he invented, the one that was holding him captive for weeks and he understood what was happening – they were plugging him to it again. They were going to send him to some new virtual reality, probably making him forget again about everything. He was terrified, but there was one consolation that he felt as the guards grabbed him and started leading him from the lab – he knew that whatever reality he was in, Jeongguk was going to find his way to him and he was going to make him remember again if needed. Because from Mr. Choi’s journal, Taehyung knew that Jeongguk was out there looking for him and Taehyung knew that he was not going to give up, because if everything he has seen in those dreams was real, if those were memories of his real life, he knew that Jeongguk’s love and devotion was too strong for him to forget Taehyung. They were eventually going to reunite, Taehyung was sure of that.

Chapter Text

“JK, you and your unit go that way and you Hobi and your men go there,” Namjoon pointed in two different directions.

The special force unit of their company was in the woods North of Seoul, because they finally got a decent lead on Taehyung’s whereabouts a few days ago. Jeongguk was ready to go in action right then and there, but Namjoon reasoned with him that they needed to plan this properly. So for a couple of days, twenty of the best men of their agency spent in a meeting room, going through maps and satellite photos of the area around the building that belonged to the Black Star corporation, which was one of their biggest rivals, especially in the science field. It was their best lead yet, because it made sense that their rivals would want Taehyung to work for them since he was one of the most brilliant minds in science in the country.

“We know that they have their own special unit,” Namjoon reminded his men since he was in the lead of the agents and it was his responsibility to make sure that the mission was successful and that no one was harmed.

“Be careful, the place is going to be guarded, we have to be quick and smart about this,” he added, looking around before his eyes stopped at Jeongguk: “Don’t be reckless, no matter what, we all want to get out of here in one piece.”

Jeongguk gave him a curt nod, but his gaze was determined. Weeks and weeks he has spent working day and night to find his husband, he even sacrificed the time with their kids in order to get Taehyung back and now, finally, he had bigger hope than ever. He has been nervous, because he hasn’t managed to reach Taehyung for more than a week and he knew that there might be innocent and logical explanation to it, but he had this ugly gut feeling that was telling him that his husband was not doing well. So he was going to do anything he could to rescue Taehyung, if it meant he had to take out every fucker in that building, so be it. He was one of the best agents, agile, fast, strong, good at close combat as well as shooting and he was glad that this mission was deemed special enough for them to be allowed to kill if necessary. They worked in a very grey area of the law, but they hardly ever resorted to taking lives, this time though, they got permission from the higher-ups and he couldn’t say that he was going to feel sorry for anyone he shot today.

Namjoon gave the order and they finally attacked, all twenty men carrying heavy rifles and moving like soldiers. All of them served in the military, some were even professional soldiers prior to joining the agency, and all of them were good at what they did.

They surrounded the building with no trouble, no one noticed them, which was because they had disabled the outside security cameras with a great device that Taehyung invented about two years ago and that put all cameras out of order with a push of a single button on a small. That moment of surprise gave them a bigger chance of success.

Hoseok went to the heavy metal door, covered by a few other men in case someone attacked, and he attached a small explosive to it.

The door broke open one minute later and they threw in tear gas grenades, putting on protective goggles with a special filter over the nose and mouth, which was another one of Taehyung’s brilliant inventions, because it was much more practical than the usual gas masks.

Jeongguk went in amongst the first, shooting the first target as soon as he saw a movement. They moved through the building quickly and smoothly, eliminating everyone that they met and they got deep inside the facility before the rivals started even returning the fire.

When they did, things became harder and messier and the advance slowed down, because they had to take cover and get in the crossfire.

Jeongguk himself was on a mission of his own, he separated himself from the rest of the group and went door to door, looking for his husband. His heart was beating fast, partly from adrenaline and partly from hope, because he might finally see Taehyung in person for the first time in months.

He managed to shoot or knock down everyone he met, but thankfully it seemed like most of the local guards fell for the diversion that the rest of his team had caused in the spacious cafeteria, so that’s where the fighting was going on. He met some people in lab coats too, they were unarmed, so he only knocked them down with a couple of precise kicks or punches, he didn’t believe in harming unarmed people and scientists, he wouldn’t want anyone to shoot Taehyung or Seokjin if they ever attacked their facility.

He checked a couple of laboratories, disappointed that he didn’t find Taehyung in any of them. He had no idea where the other might be, were they holding him locked up somewhere or was he free to walk around? Surely now that the attack was going on, they dragged him somewhere to hide him, but he hoped that the two men that stayed outside on the watch would prevent the fuckers from sneaking Taehyung into a car and leaving.

The facility was not big and there weren’t many more doors to check and his anxiety was rising with every passing minute. Before going in, he was so sure that he was finally going to get his husband back, but now he had a bad feeling in his stomach.

He walked around a corner, not as focused as he should be since he kept worrying about Taehyung. That was his mistake that nearly cost him life, but when he heard the gun shots, it was too late.

His back hit the wall when he felt sharp pain in his shoulder and the impact pushed him back. He quickly ducked down though to cover himself from the shower of bullets from the rifle, but his arm started feeling numb and he couldn’t lift it up and he couldn’t really return fire with just one arm.

Before he could do anything, the attacker got to him and he didn’t even manage to look up, he only saw legs and then a knee that hit his face and then everything went black.

*

He woke up with some rhythmical beeping in the background, but he felt dizzy and couldn’t really comprehend what was happening.

“You’re up,” someone said and he had to blink a couple of times to focus, not understanding why he felt so tired and light-headed.

“I pumped you with sedatives, so you are high,” that voice said to him and when he finally focused, he recognized a familiar face.

“Hyung,” he said, voice raspy as Seokjin in a white lab coat came to him and handed him a glass of water, holding the back of his head to help him drink.

“Namjoonie called me on your way back, so I rushed here since none of the other doctors that work here were at work so late,” Seokjin started explaining. Now that Jeongguk looked around, he recognized the agency’s infirmary, he had been there before with some injuries, although this was the first time that he woke up in the bed, plugged to a heart monitor and with tubes sticking from his hands.

“You lost lots of blood,” Seokjin added: “From what Namjoonie and Hobi told me, they found you knocked out and eliminated the guy that was standing above you, thank god they got there in time, I can’t even imagine what else he might have done to you.”

“I was shot.”

“Yes, I am aware, I pulled a bullet from your shoulder an hour ago and gave you a transfusion.”

“He knocked me out with his knee,” the younger commented.

“That would explain the ugly bruise on your nose, you are lucky it’s not broken.”

“How about the others?”

“Everyone is fine, I guess they were more careful than you,” Seokjin said, scolding him softly: “I told you to be careful and less reckless, you hardly ever lose focus and get hurt, Jeongguk-ah, but I knew that you were gonna be distracted this time.”

“What about Taehyung?” Jeongguk suddenly gasped, remembering what the whole mission was about and why he got hurt. He sat up, cringing in pain, but he ignored it as he looked around the room, hoping to find his husband there.

“Where is Taehyung, hyung?” he asked more urgently and more loudly, piercing the elder with an insistent gaze.

“He wasn’t there,” Seokjin let out a long sigh.

“What do you mean he wasn’t there?!”

“You need to calm down, your body just went through a shock, you have to relax and rest.”

“How can I relax and rest when you are telling me that my husband was not found?” Jeongguk snapped: “Did they get him out and escaped with him?”

“We will have to wait for more information but Namjoonie thinks that Taehyungie was never there,” the scientist revealed.

“So it was another false lead?”

“Well, probably not,” Seokjin shook his head: “Namjoonie is convinced that Black Star is behind it, I mean, it makes sense that they would want Taehyung on their side, they are specializing in inventions of new technologies, especially of military type. But they surely have more than one secret facility and they didn’t hold Taehyung in there.”

“So all of this was for nothing,” Jeongguk sighed, leaning back against the pillow, feeling exhausted, not because of his injury, but because of how fucking hopeless and helpless he’s felt all this time.

“I wouldn’t say,” Seokjin said, giving him an encouraging smile: “If it’s Black Star then we are onto them, we managed to capture some people alive, they were brought here and locked up for later questioning and Namjoonie ordered the facility to be searched for any documents and clues that might help us.”

“Well, I will gladly have a friendly chat with those captured fuckers,” the younger said with hard eyes.

“No one is gonna stop you, but now you need to rest and heal,” Seokjin said seriously: “The injury is not serious and it hit your shoulder and not your stomach with all the organs, which is good, but you still need to take a break for a while to recover.”

“How are Taemin and Jihyo?” Jeongguk suddenly asked, calmer and quieter.

“They are doing great,” Seokjin reassured him: “They miss you, of course, once you get out of here, you can come see them, it would do all three of you some good to spend an afternoon together.”

“Yeah, I think it is a good idea,” Jeongguk nodded, because he couldn’t deny that he missed the twins. He felt guilty for leaving them with his friends, but he felt also guilty for not being able to bring their papa home, every time he came to see them, they were asking for Taehyung and he felt like such a failure that he hasn’t been able to find him and bring him home where he belonged, to his family.

“Great, now go to sleep, I am gonna give you more sedatives, it will help with pain and with the healing,” Seokjin said as he grabbed a syringe with a clear liquid in it that he had prepared on a small stainless steel table next to the bed.

Jeongguk felt a slightly uncomfortable prick in his arm a moment later and then, after just a minute or so, his eyelids started feeling heavy. And he didn’t want to fight it because god knows that he hadn’t slept well in weeks, so the prospect of a calm, all-night sleep was actually welcomed.

*

Jeongguk recovered rather quickly thanks to the best and most modern medical technologies that were invented here in the agency. That was one of the perks of working there, even inventions that were not commonly used and were still in testing phases were available to the employees much sooner than to the companies they collaborated with.

He went to question some of the Black Star company members that they have managed to catch during their mission, because Namjoon told him that they didn’t get anything from them, but it turned out that Jeongguk wasn’t going to be any more successful than others that have already tried. Not because he or his colleagues would be bad at questioning, but because these people had no idea about Taehyung’s kidnapping or his whereabouts. It wasn’t that surprising, really, the less people knew about the whole thing, the smaller were the chances of someone breaking the secret. These were all just common employees who had no idea about their bosses’ plans and antics.

The documents and computers that their agency confiscated and thoroughly searched showed nothing either and Jeongguk started getting frustrated again. He and others firmly believed that Black Star was behind Taehyung’s disappearance, they had the finances, the means and the reasons to have Taehyung, but there was no lead that would help them figure out where he was.

So Jeongguk thought that the best way to help his husband was to continue trying to reach him through the neuro-device, because he has managed to connect with Taehyung through it before.

He was spending days and nights in Taehyung’s lab, sometimes not even going home and sleeping on the small sofa that was there. He went to see the twins and spent a lovely afternoon with them, but they continued asking about their papa, so when he left, he was just more frustrated with himself, because he felt useless.

Seokjin kept telling him to not be plugged too much, worried about the neurological consequences the fairly new and unexplored technology might have on him, but Jeongguk just told him to continue testing him and monitoring his health, so far there didn’t seem to be any dangerous or irreversible side effects.

He was wandering in the nothingness most of the time, it was actually a bit scary, all the darkness that was surrounding him when he was plugged to the device. But he didn’t lose his hope, because from time to time, he heard Taehyung’s voice, he couldn’t really make out what he was saying, but he was there somewhere, he could be found and Jeongguk was determined to do just that. Sometimes he heard Taehyung whimper and even scream in pain, it always made blood freeze in his system, because he had no idea what was happening and what those fuckers were doing to him and if it was happening in real life or in Taehyung’s mind.

Finally, nearly two weeks after the mission, when he plugged in and wandered through the darkness of his own mind, he saw a dim light in the distance. He started running towards it, feeling in his chest that this was it, that he finally found Taehyung.

He found a door that was not completely shut, he opened it and entered a small room that looked like some kind of basement without windows.

His heart fell into his stomach when he took in the scene. Taehyung, shackled to a stone wall with blood covering several parts of his body. He saw a man in front of him, laughing as he created a cut with a sharp knife, making Taehyung scream in pain. The sound and the visuals were gruesome, it was breaking Jeongguk’s heart to see the love of his life like that, helpless and tortured.

The only consolation he had was that he knew it wasn’t real. Because he had only seen Taehyung while he was plugged to the device or when he was sleeping, so he knew that this was either a terrible nightmare or – and that was more probable – they plugged him in virtual reality again and this was a program designed to literally torture him. The good thing was that it meant that Taehyung’s body wasn’t truly physically suffering, he wasn’t really injured, but his brain thought it was real, so the pain he felt was real.

He came to the torturer and tried to tear him away from the elder and punch him, but when he wanted to grab his shoulder, it was as if his fingers closed around air. It made sense, if this wasn’t real, he couldn’t really touch the man. He could only feel and touch Taehyung in this strange world in their heads before, because the two of them were real and not part of a program.

He had to get through to Taehyung somehow, because he could tell that for now, he couldn’t see him. It happened before, Jeongguk was there with him before but only a few times he was able to actually talk to the scientist.

He talked to Taehyung, telling him that he was here and that he was not going to suffer for much longer. He knew that most of what he was saying were just empty promises, because he still had no idea where Taehyung was and how to find him, but he needed Taehyung to maintain hope and keep holding on.

After what felt like forever, the torturer finally left so Taehyung was in the room alone. He was softly sobbing and Jeongguk wanted to hug him so fucking much, kiss his head and tell him that he was there and that he was going to be okay. Taehyung was one of the kindest people he’s ever known, he didn’t deserve to be put through all this shit just because one greedy company decided they needed him for their research and kidnapped him.

“Tae, baby, I am here,” he spoke again after he cleared his throat, determined to break through the invisible barrier that was separating them and make the other see him.

He cupped Taehyung’s cheeks, relieved when he could actually touch him, although it didn’t seem like the elder felt anything.

“None of this is real, you are in VR again, I don’t know why, you probably started causing some trouble and they punished you,” he continued, putting two and two together. He knew that Taehyung woke up before and was in reality and they kept meeting in Taehyung’s dreams. But now he was obviously plugged in again and Jeongguk wondered why? If they wanted Taehyung to help them with some project, it surely didn’t do anything to keep him here and torture him, that meant that Taehyung must have done something that they didn’t like. Maybe he discovered the truth, maybe he finally remembered and knew what was going on, so they imprisoned him in his own mind with no way to escape.

“Tae, angel, I am here and I am not gonna leave you,” he spoke again, brushing Taehyung’s cheeks gently, looking at him intently and hoping that the strong emotional bond they had was going to make Taehyung see him again.

Taehyung suddenly twitched a little, almost closing his eyes as if they suddenly hurt and he was staring right at Jeongguk. And the younger remembered Taehyung talking about the bring white light that prevented him from seeing him before, was Taehyung seeing that light again?

Then suddenly Taehyung’s eyes opened wider and focused on him and Jeongguk knew, Taehyung was looking at him, really looking.

“J-Jeonggukie,” he got out, voice raspy.

“I am here, angel,” Jeongguk nodded, covering his cheeks completely with his palms and by the way Taehyung leaned into one of his hands, he could tell that he felt his touch and warmth.

“Y-you’re here,” Taehyung got out, eyes filled with a mixture of pain, exhaustion but also happiness and hope.

“They plugged you to that thing again.”

“I know.”

“You do?”

“I remember,” Taehyung nodded and it looked like a bit of his strength came back just from talking to Jeongguk: “They didn’t make me forget this time, I think they want me to know that I am being punished.”

“Punished for what?”

“I refused to work on their project,” the elder explained briefly: “I guess I wasn’t a good puppet that they needed for this. I started looking around too and I found some things…I know that…you are real.”

“I am,” Jeongguk smiled.

“Will you come for me?” Taehyung got out, the pain in his voice making Jeongguk want to cry.

“I have been trying, darling,” Jeongguk promised: “I have been trying every day and every night, I never stopped looking. But I don’t know where they hold you, is there anything you have noticed about the place that you are in that could help me?”

“I don’t know,” Taehyung shook his head with a heavy sigh: “I just know that we are in the middle of the woods but…I haven’t found anything that would tell me where we are.”

“That’s okay, it’s fine, I will still find you,” the younger reassured him.

“Jeongguk?” Taehyung got out, squinting again and Jeongguk knew what it meant. He was disappearing in that light.

“Just hold on a bit longer, I know you can!” Jeongguk said loudly, hoping the other would still hear him: “I will come for you, okay? I promise, love.”

“I will be waiting!” Taehyung yelled just before Jeongguk was suddenly pulled back by an invisible force, back into the darkness and when he opened his eyes a moment later, he was sitting in Taehyung’s lab.

He had no idea how to find his husband, but he knew that he had to, especially now that they were putting him through literal mental torture. He needed some miracle though, otherwise they would have to search all the woods in the country and that would take months.

*

Surprising yet welcomed help came only two days later. Jeongguk was at home, which wasn’t very common since he spent most nights in the lab. He came back about an hour ago and opened a cold beer, he didn’t drink a lot, but sometimes it helped with the piling stress he’s felt ever since he watched his husband being taken from that parking lot while he failed to protect him. The guilt was eating him alive, he had the best training, he belong amongst the most elite agents in the country, yet he could do nothing when those fuckers came to kidnap his husband.

He looked at his phone when it started ringing, wondering who it might be. Seokjin and Namjoon sometimes called to make him talk to the twins, but it was too late for that tonight, Taemin and Jihyo were fast asleep by now.

For a moment he thought it was someone from the agency with some news about Taehyung, but when he looked at the screen, he saw that it was a hidden caller.

“Hello?” he accepted the call, heart speeding up a little, because of the mysterious number that he couldn’t see and that could be hardly traced. Whoever was calling him, it was clear that they didn’t want him to track them.

“Jeon Jeongguk?” a male, unfamiliar voice asked on the other side of the line.

“Yeah, and who are you?” Jeongguk sat up, feeling slightly jittery.

“My name isn’t important, in fact, I’d prefer for it to stay unknown to you,” the guy replied. He was speaking quietly, almost whispering, which told Jeongguk that he didn’t want to be overheard. He has learned many things during his training and career as an agent, it wasn’t just about action and fighting, it was important to know how to read body language and emotions too and he couldn’t see the guy, but just based on the tone and volume of his voice and the speed of his breathing, he could tell that he was nervous.

“Why are you calling?” Jeongguk pressed when the man didn’t say anything for a while.

“I’m calling about Taehyung.”

Jeongguk stood up, unable to remain sitting calmly when the man mentioned his husband’s name.

“You are one of those fuckers, aren’t you?” he growled into the phone: “Are you calling to mock me? Listen here, you piece of shit, I am gonna find Taehyung and I am gonna find all of you who have been holding him and you will regret being born.”

He wasn’t usually so easily aggravated, he wasn’t emotional, especially when it concerned work, but he couldn’t help it when it came to Taehyung. He has been stressed as hell for months, so it actually felt good to be speaking to one of them and use them as a punching bag. He would much rather be punching him for real, but even cursing him helped a little.

“I guess I deserve that,” the guy mumbled: “Listen, I don’t have much time, they can’t know I am calling.”

“They? Your bosses?”

“I have seen what they are doing to Taehyung,” the guy continued without answering the question: “And believe me, I never agreed with how they took him in the first place. I know that you have been talking to him through that device, so you have some idea what is happening to him. Have you seen him lately?”

“Just two days ago, in a small prison of his mind, being tortured,” Jeongguk growled out.

“I saw him too just today,” the guy revealed: “I wanted to know…what they were doing to him. He pissed off some people and they punished him for it and I might work for them and be a piece of shit, but I am not a complete asshole. I like Taehyung, he doesn’t deserve this.”

“That is very nice to hear, but why are you calling?” Jeongguk asked impatiently: “Unless you are gonna tell me where I can find my husband, I think this conversation is over.”

“I wanna do more than that,” the guy breathed out: “I am gonna set him free.”

Jeongguk blinked, silent for a moment, because that was not what he was expecting.

“What’s the catch?” he asked.

“There is no catch, I just wanna maintain some clean conscience, it is wrong that he was taken away from his family and friends, from you…”

“Thanks for your sympathies.”

“I will help him escape, he will be weak but he can manage to run for a couple of kilometres, I am sure,” the guy started with his plan: “I have access to all doors due to my job, letting him out won’t be hard. I will disable the cameras around the object too, it will give him some advantage.”

“So you are just going to let him out into unknown woods?” Jeongguk scoffed: “He will get lost, he might get injured.”

“He won’t get lost when you come for him.”

“I am listening.”

“I will tell you where to drive and where to wait for him, I will tell him in which direction to run and I will give him a flashlight to turn on once he is far from the facility, that way you will be able to see him.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Jeongguk admitted, almost feeling touched. There was some humanity left in this world after all. This guy knew and liked Taehyung and he didn’t like what they were doing to him and he was ready to risk his career, maybe even life for helping Taehyung escape.

“There is just one thing I want from you.”

“What is it?”

“Take one or two men, get Taehyung and get out of there,” the man said: “Don’t go in the woods to look for us.”

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?”

“I help your husband, you won’t come for our asses,” the guy said: “I think that is a fair deal, don’t you think? I know that you and your agency won’t let it slide, I know that you will come and search the woods, I am just asking for you to not do it immediately. Once they find out that Taehyung is gone, they are gonna evacuate the place, we will all have a chance to escape.”

“And I should agree with this why? Taehyung will be free but you will escape justice!” Jeongguk argued.

“Isn’t having him back most important to you?”

Jeongguk hesitated. He knew that Namjoon and the higher-ups would never agree with this, they wanted Taehyung back, but they wouldn’t let the opportunity to storm the facility slide. But that guy was right, for him, the most important thing was to get Taehyung back and he didn’t care about anything else. If Taehyung was safe and with him, he didn’t care if those fuckers got away, they were going to have other opportunities to get them, hopefully.

“When and where should I come?” he asked with determination, knowing that there was nothing to think about. He was finally going to bring Taehyung home like he promised to him and their children.