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look me in the eyes (you'll never have to hide)

Summary:

"henry...come here" Ray asked, and Henry let the softness of his voice embrace him for a second. He loved the way ray talked to him..he sounded like a father talking to his kid, the kind of voice henry never got to hear.

But that feeling of warm was replaced with one of panic
𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰𝘥 henry though
𝘋𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸? 𝘋𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵? pure panic formed in his stomach, he wanted to throw up, thoughts run like hell in his mind without stopping. He could feel a knot of anxiety and panic tightening his heart 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘥𝘰? 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘶𝘱? 𝘰𝘮𝘨 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘦! 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘪𝘵- 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦? 𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰-"

"henry." Ray's voice snapped him to reality, his eyes were filled with concern

𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵

Notes:

Hi everyone!! This is the first story I write, I hope you like it and I'm sorry in advance for eventual bad grammar since English isn't my first language. I love ray and henry so much and I couldn't not write a fic, so here we are. By the way henry is 15 in this. Any comment are appreciated!!

Chapter Text

It was around 4:45 pm when henry was finally heading home after school, normally he would just go straight to work to avoid his father, but he's been so busy with being ray's sidekick that he didn't have time to study properly for his algebra test, and he failed it. And obviously due to his wonderful luck, his father had to sign it.
God he hated him, like he hated what he was supposed to call "home", every time he couldn't be with Ray or his friends and he had to stay home he felt like a bird in a cage, trapped without a way to escape. Jake has alway been violent with them, ever since he divorced his mom and she just left without saying anything to her kids, leaving them with an alcoholic with anger issues. But fortunately henry was most likely to hit his nerve which was a good thing so he wouldn't touch his little sister, he alway made sure that she was at a friend's house everytime he wasn't home to protect her. So basically henry took all the hits, but it was okay, he was used to being hurt anyway. He fought with criminal twice his size all the time when he was kid danger, at this point it was regular that he came back from patrol with bruises, broken bones, bloody nose and all that. (Well in some cases it was actually his fault because ray always tried to convince him to get checked from schwoz before going back home but henry always waved him off saying stuff like "you don't need to worry" "I'm okay" "I have bandages at home".

The thing is that he hated when ray was worried about him, he really didn't need to be, but he was all the time even if he tried not to show it.) But that didn't mean it hurt less when he was in pain because of his father, who was so busy with the need of taking all his anger off, that he forgot there was his son in front of him, the one he should've loved with all his heart, the one he hit every chance he got just because he felt like it. And..well, sometimes, he just couldn't take it. All the pressure he felt by being captain man's sidekick, the weight on his shoulders every time he was too slow and someone else got hurt, man, all the nightmares he had these past years that he didn't have the gut to tell Ray, all his father's words still stuck in his head no matter what

sometimes, the one who hurt Henry, the one who managed to do worse than anything he could handle,

was himself.

That is why hiding his pain from the only one that could see it, that could see him, was becoming a lot harder than before. The truth is that ray was one of the reasons he hated to go home, because henry knew that ray was the closest thing he had to home, ray was his home, like a father to him.

But this time he had to face his father before going to work because of that dumb sign his teacher wanted for tomorrow, and normally henry would've waited until dinner to tell him but that day Jake had to work late and he wouldn't be home....so he had to do it now.

And that's why he was in front of the door, trying with shaky hands to unlock it knowing what would have come the moment he stepped into the living room, and how he would have covered the bruises from Ray. Finally he manage to open it, he took a deep breath and started scanning the room searching for jake.

"dad?" he hated the amount of fear he had in his voice, but he just couldn't hide it.

"henry? is that you?" the voice of his father came from the kitchen, and for a moment henry though he was..calm, that maybe he wasn't in a bad mood for once.
So he walked into the room, and leaning on the counter there was his father. Expect he could see the rage in his face.

"Do you mind to....explain to me WHY your teacher called me?" his father yelled, he was furious, anyone could tell. And henry was petrified by him, he alway has been.
"Um..just, you know-" he didn't get to finish, cause Jake was already marching towards him.
Henry tried to back away, shuttering what was meant to be an explanation more than ad apology
"Dad- I..I'm sorry, please don't-" that's when his father's fist connected to his face, more precisely, his left eye. The impact made the kid lose his balance, but his father caught him with a grip on his hair before he could fall.

"Don't you even try! I raised you, I did everything for you! and how do you repay me?" Jake's word felt like blades, slowly sinking into Henry's heart.
"P-please, just liste-" he was cut off by another fist, this time straight in the ribs
"by failing the only thing you should succeed! but you're good at nothing!" He just didn't stop, other punches came but henry could barely feel them, Jake tightened the grip on his hair anytime he tried to get away from the pain, every part of his body ached with pain, he just couldn't do this anymore, it was like this all the time, why couldn't his father just love him? was he that bad?

Henry was on the floor for a while know, his father smacked him across the face, punched him in the gut, kicked him when he would curl into a ball in a desperate way to feel less pain, he felt so pathetic. He was kid danger, a superhero but couldn't even protect himself from his own father? Ray really should've fire him and get himself a better sidekick that him, at the though of ray his chest felt a little bit warmer, a stark contrast to the cold floor he was laying on, praying that his father would leave him alone for once. He just wanted to get out of that place, go to the man cave and finally get to hug ray wishing that it was all over. Because that was the feeling he would have every time he hugged the man, when he was in his arms, everything outside the embrace would get blurry and for a moment he didn't have to worry about his father or the stinging feeling on his arms, all the nightmares, all the words stuck in his head would disappear and his mind would get quiet for once. He could feel tears forming at the sides of his eyes as his father took a step back and said

"I will sign your dumb grade, but next time I get a call from your school you're not getting up from the floor" He talked like there was a monster at his feet, someone he didn't recognize as his child, and the realization that his father though of him like he was just a burner, a failure and nothing more hit henry like a brick in the face.

Ray was pacing around the man cave, worry filling every inch of his body. Henry should've been here like 2 hours ago, where the hell was he? Ray tried to call him several times but henry didn't answer, he called Charlotte and she told him that he would probably be late due to a teacher wanting to talk to him, he shouldn't be so worried because henry will be here any second now but sometimes ray would just find himself get so worried even if he shouldn't be, he just couldn't shake off the feeling that the kid got hurt, specially when henry would never tell him if he ever was. Just when he was to call him again, he heard the doors of the elevator open and a figure walked into the room, hood covering his face with the eyes glued to the floor.

"Henry! where were you? do you know what time is it? you were supposed to be here 2 hours ago! you didn't even answered my calls" even a deaf could hear the amount of concern in his voice, ray wanted to say that he was glad the boy was okay...but he wasn't so sure of it, just when he was about to ask, henry spoke

and God, his voice sounded like a whisper

"I'm sorry..I, uh..made you worry, I didn't mean it"

Ray was hit by a whole new level of worry, scanning the kid to understand as much as he could without him talking. The hood over his face, him staring at the floor, the uncertainty of his voice, and the constantly pulling his sleeves down that he saw the past few days, he didn't want to make henry uncomfortable, but there was a limit to his silence, there was a line that shouldn't be crossed when it came to this stuff, especially when it was henry they were talking about. So he carefully took a step forward, and he tried to be as gentle as he could.

"it's fine kid, is everything okay?"

Henry was visibly uncomfortable, as he started walking towards the round couch at the center of the room while Ray followed him with his eyes.

"Um yeah, something came up at school but it's nothing, sorry for..being late.." he smiled, trying to be as casual as possible, but ray wasn't buying it.

"So...what's up with the hood?" He asked as he reached henry that was standing next to the couch, but stopped as soon as he was at the other end of it, facing him.

"Nothing Ray..I'm just a bit cold that's all" He told his boss as anxiety grew in his voice as he spoke.

He obviously wasn't letting this slide, henry was his kid, and if really there was someone of something that was causing him pain or stress, he wanted to know, he wasn't going to stay here and watch while henry was hurting just because he didn't know how to ask for help.

"henry...come here" Ray asked, and Henry let the softness of his voice embrace him for a second. He loved the way ray talked to him..he sounded like a father talking to his kid, the kind of voice henry never got to hear.

But that feeling of warm was replaced with one of panic
𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰𝘥 henry though
𝘋𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸? 𝘋𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵? pure panic formed in his stomach, he wanted to throw up, thoughts run like hell in his mind without stopping. He could feel a knot of anxiety and panic tightening his heart 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘥𝘰? 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘶𝘱? 𝘰𝘮𝘨 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘦! 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘪𝘵- 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦? 𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰-"

"henry." Ray's voice snapped him to reality, his eyes were filled with concern

𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵

"right...um.." He stayed silent for a moment, he genuinely didn't know what to do. A part of him wanted to run away from ray as far as he could, he hated that the man could see through him so well. The other..he wanted to tell him everything, every thought in his mind, every pinch of anxiety he felt, every word stuck in his head, every cut curved in his skin, each one a word frozen in his throat that he was too afraid to let go. He wanted him to know how much he was hurting and how tired he was, so that ray could let him sink his head on his shoulder and keep him close with his embrace so that henry could finally rest.

But he couldn't. He couldn't let the burdens he was tied to fall on the only person who cared about him, it wasn't fair, those were his problems
not ray's.

Henry stayed where he was, despite the other's request. He just didn't get it, why did he care so much anyway? It's not like henry did something for him, he wasn't even good at being his sidekick, so why?

"Please, you know you can talk to me. Whatever it is just let me help you" Ray said taking a step ahead, at witch henry took one back.

"I don't need any help, I told you nothing happened" his voice was sharp, made to bury all the pain he was feeling, creating a wall between him and his boss. But ray could see through it, he knew what the boy was trying to do and he wouldn't let him so easy, he knew something was up and he needed to know what it was even if henry didn't want him to.

"Charlotte told me your teacher wanted to talk to you? You said something came up at school, what happened?" he asked, henry stayed silent for a bit, trying to find an excuse that made sense.

"Why is this so important to you? can't you just drop it?" he said clearly nervous, knowing ray wouldn't drop it unless he convinced him somehow, which was impossible. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't get himself to lie to him, because he simply didn't really want to, he could never lie to ray, he loved him too much to do that.

"why is this important? because you are! It's you we're talking about hen, not just some random kid. And why would I want to drop it when it's obvious something happened?" ray answered, voice increasing with concern over the fact that henry still wouldn't tell him anything.

"because nothing happened! I'm fine ray!" he snapped

"oh you're fine? then since you're so fine and there's nothing to worry about take the damn hoodie off!" his boss was starting to lose patience. Henry's mind became silent for a second, he was hesitating, unable to move his body

but he did that anyway, he put his fingers on the soft fabric, pulling it down. Henry's eyes stayed on the floor for a while, until they met those of his boss's.

Ray froze, his face...was a mess. There were bags under his eyes, and the left one had a light shade of purple mixed with red, it must've hurt since henry couldn't open it. Ray could feel his chest raising with rage, his eyes darkened. He carefully started walking towards the kid, 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘥, who's face had clearly been used as if it was a punching bag, just the thought made him sick.
He was in front of henry now, he could see the shame in his eyes filled with tears that he was trying not to drop. Ray cupped his cheeks raising his face so he could have a better look of it.

"kid...what happened to your face?" as soon as the words left him henry launched himself wrapping his arms around ray's neck, making him lose his balance a bit, he steadied and returned the hug as tight as he could wrapping his arms around the shaking boy, who silently sobbed into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry-, ray? I'm so sorry" henry whispered gripping the limb of his shirt.
"I-I tried...but" he was sobbing so desperately ray wanted to find whoever did this to his kid and he would've haunt them for the rest of their life
"he just didn't stop...I didn't stop him I-...I'm so sorry I didn't tell you anything but...you know, I-"

"It's okay kiddo" Ray interrupted him "everything's fine, I'm here and I won't let anything happen to you, I promise" he said running his fingers through his blonde hair and drawing circles on his back while henry broke crying again

After a couple of minutes ray could feel him growing heavy in his arms, he must've been exhausted, poor kid.
"you're tired huh?" he didn't expect an answer as he lift him up, so that he could carry him in the guest room that was practically Henry's.
"damn kid, you're getting big" he muttered while the boy tightened the arms he had wrapped around his neck while ray started walking his way to the bedroom.

Chapter Text

Henry woke up two hours later, it took him a moment to realized what happened. Thoughts started running in his mind, he could feel an headache already, but at least this time he didn't have a nightmare which was a little weird. He remembered the fight he had with his father and now that he thought of it, he wasn't in his bedroom, he was at the man cave...so that meant he fell asleep? Suddenly memories from the whole day started to make their way to Henry's mind, he remembered everything. And one thing out of all made him shiver...

𝘙𝘦𝘺 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸.

But wait, did he? Yeah he saw his face but henry didn't actually say anything about it, he just cried. God it was so awkward, did he actually cried like that in in front of his boss? That definitely wasn't supposed to happen, henry built walls for a reason, he couldn't let anybody know what really did happen. How much of a jerk his father was and how much he feared him, nobody knew it and it had to stay that way or the boy was certain Jake would've killed him.

So when he reached for his phone placed on the nightstand and he unlocked it looking at the time, he swore he could feel every part of his body froze with horror. Everything around him started spinning, his vision blurred, and he felt his heart beating so loud it could've burst out of his chest at any second. His eyes were locked on the device as he tried to formulate how late it was.

One in the morning? He felt like there was no oxygen in the room, he couldn't breath, he couldn't-..

𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘪𝘵.

He didn't know what to do, he didn't wanna go home but his sister was there and he couldn't leave her alone or he-..he would've-..oh god, he couldn't breathe. Panic was starting to spread on every inch of his body and without thinking, he started to pick at his wrist with his nails, scratching it with uncontrollable rage until blood started to come out of small slashes. In that moment hurting himself was the only way he could think of to stay focused from all the things he was feeling, but somehow he still couldn't concentrate properly, he added pressure on his wrist, in a desperate way to shut down all the thoughts that were spreading in his mind without letting him think at all. But he needed to think- or....he needed something sharper, he needed- ..crap.

He was screwed. He knew it, he needed to get out of there as fast as he could, and maybe he would've got home in time before his father was back, his head hurt like hell, he needed to think. A ring coming from his phone brought him back from his thoughts, his sister was calling him? He took his fingers off his wrist without looking at the mess he made, he couldn't bring himself to realize he did that unconsciously, by instinct, again. The guilt was already making his way to his chest, creating a void he couldn't escape. But he shut that down, picking up the phone.

"piper?"

"henry! Where are you? Do you know what time it is?" his sister was worried, and he hated that.

"yeah sorry, there was a..uh..situation at work and I lost track of time. I'll be home as soon as I can, are you okay? Did you eat?"

"I'm fine, I ate at Marla's. Please be home before he does, you know I don't want you getting in trouble"

"yeah I know, see you soon. Click"

"okay, click"

He hung up, and took off the covers before standing up from the bed, the black spots threatening his vision reminded him that unlike piper, he didn't eat anything at dinner, or at lunch since his father wouldn't bother to give him money for school's lunches. And he refused Charlotte's offer to eat some of her meal. But he could live with that, it wasn't a problem. Not until ray would've found out at least, was he even awake? He hoped not but it didn't really matter, he needed to go home no matter what. So he carefully opened the door and walked down the hallway, ending up in the main room of the man cave. Fortunately ray wasn't there, which wasn't so strange since it was late in the first place, he breathed a sigh of relief and started to make his way to the elevator, when he heard a voice coming from behind him.

"henry?" it was ray, obliviously. "Where are you going?" he asked

𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥.

"hey..I'm going back home" he answered, voice uncertain.

"In the middle of the night? Can't you stay over just for today?" Henry could feel he was already starting to worry, and he didn't want to deal with it at the moment. He had to get to his sister before it was too late.

"My parents would get worried so...I really can't, I'm sorry ray, perhaps another time" he said hoping ray would've bought it.

"fine kid, but I'm giving you a ride home" He offered (except henry couldn't say otherwise) pointing his finger at him before grabbing his keys.

 

"Here you go" his boss said pulling the car over.
"Thank you ray, I appreciate it" henry told him with a smile, at which ray ruffled his hair before returning it.
"Go to sleep kiddo, you have school tomorrow"
"I will" he said, then got out of the car

"and eat something, you didn't have anything for dinner" he added, with his usual fatherly tone he would have anytime he reminded henry to take care of himself
" yeah yeah, see you tomorrow" he waved goodbye as ray drove away back to the store. Henry checked his phone, 1:46. Technically he made it in time, but he chose to use the window to get inside anyway. Then he will go to sleep.

He woke up with a gasp, eyes wide open from horror. He was drenched with sweat and the bed covers were all over the floor. Another nightmare, 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵, he changed to a sitting position running a hand through his hair trying to calm himself down, he checked the time from the alarm laying on the nightstand, it was 5 in the morning and he had to get up in two hours. He knew there were no chances that he would've go back to sleep, that was his problem about nightmares, they woke him up in the middle of the night or early in the morning and then even if he was exhausted he couldn't go back to sleep. So he got out of bed, and changed into a blue shirt with a black hoodie and black jeans as well. He reached for the window opening it and in no time he was out of the house. He just wanted to walk a bit, it was still dark outside but it didn't bother him. He had to be back by 7 tho, so he could get to school in time.

It was 5:20 in the morning when henry was heading to the park of his city, walking at that time of the day felt like heaven for him, there was nobody else around and it helped him keep his mind together when he had the worst nightmares. But he also liked being alone so that he could think in peace. He walked for about 15 minutes when he finally reached the park.

At the moment he was sitting on a bench while thinking about his boss. They didn't talk about what happened the day before but henry knew ray was going to ask questions, cause he always worried so much about him, and he just couldn't put his fingers on 𝘸𝘩𝘺, why was he so worried all the time? Why did he care so much henry didn't know. He always asked himself if ray loved him as much as his sidekick did, it was like ray was the best thing that ever happened to him, but how did his boss feel about him? Did he really cared? Did he actually loved him?

But that train of thoughts ended when his mind fell on the memory of his mom..he didn't know where she was, how she was doing, was she better off without them? Why did she leave her family like that? He could understand leaving her husband, but her kids?.

He remembered being a kid, how much his mom loved him despite the mess that his father was, she always reassured henry. No matter what happened in that family kris always remained strong for her babies, she treated them like they were her world, the most important things in her life, protecting them with all she had was her only goal. So why did she left? Henry could never understand that, why did his mom left him like that? Did she saw him as a burden, a failure, an ungrateful child like his father did? Did she really thought that? But why? What did he do to give them that idea of him?

 

Maybe he was a burden after all, maybe he deserved this. Maybe he didn't deserve a mom like her, and that's why she left, maybe she couldn't take it anymore..of how much of a failure his boy was, despite all the things she did for him. But he loved her, so much. And it hurted. A lot.

 

Tears rolled down his cheeks, he was so tired. He wanted ray.

He just wanted to talk to him, maybe he could've understand. Did he even deserved him? What if he would leave him too, like his mother did. Well, if he did that he wouldn't blame him, but now he just wanted a hug from him. Hearing the way his voice would softener just for henry, a stark contrast to the constant yelling he gave everyone, but not him. He never yelled at henry except when he was worried sick, ray was the only one that could make him feel loved. He missed him, when it was almost 6 am and he was on a bench alone, starving, out in the cold..and his wrist hurt 𝘴𝘰 𝘣𝘢𝘥 he wanted to cry, with thoughts that were draining him until there was nothing left, he just wanted to be with ray.

So he reached for the phone in his pocket out of instinct, and he scrolled till he found his contact. He almost called him, letting his feelings of loneliness and the need to be with someone he could trust take control over him, but just when he was about to tap on the call button, he heard a scream not too far from him. He immediately forgot everything that was happening in his head as he stood up from the bench and hided behind a tree to blow a bubble. Not even a minute later he already was on the scene, there were three muggers threatening a lady in an dark alley. The first he saw was at least 2 feet taller than him, but the second one had a knife in his hand and he was pointing it at the victim, while the other was at least 3 times his size. 𝘞𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘶𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘭, ,but he could do this. So first of all he screamed to get their attention, hoping the lady would take the opportunity to get out of there.

"Hey! We're picking on ladies now? That's not very gentlemans of you is it?" he said with a cocky grin, he loved being kid danger, it wasn't just that helping people would heal something in him, everytime he had the chance he would've pushed his limit so that they could be safe, he loved giving people hope, the one he lost a long time ago. But when he wore his mask, when he was kid danger, he became everything henry hart couldn't be. He wasn't an helpless kid, that failed everyone and couldn't do anything right. Kid danger was better than henry in any way possible.

When he was in his suit, every mistake he made in his life didn't matter anymore. He couldn't save himself not even in the easiest thing, so he would try to make everything better for the city he loved. He was a hero, a real one.

But being a superhero also meant that now, he had to fight these guys possibly without getting hurt, take the girl to the police and be home in less than an hour, witch was a little hard.

One of them launched himself towards him, fist raised in the air ready to hit him. But apparently they didn't know that kid danger has hypermobility, so he dodged that without any effort, hitting him in the head violently as his enemy hit the ground. He didn't have time to check if he was still conscious (but he probably wasn't) that the second guy was already on him, trowing as much punches as he could and at every part of his body without mercy, he tried to fight back but he was too strong and too big, henry was sure his shoulders where twice as captain man's. So let's just say henry wasn't in the best situation when the guy he thought was out snuck behind him grabbing his arms, pinning them behind his back so that he couldn't fight, meanwhile the other didn't stop hurting him, pulling his hair so that he could get a better aim at his face..it kinda reminded him of Jake. Henry spit up blood as the criminal laughed at his face.

"And you should be a hero? What a shame. And where's captain dad anyway? He's not going to save you this time is he?" the guy backed away a bit just to keep laughing, but in that fraction of time henry could see what was happening behind him, and it made his blood boil with rage. The young woman, that was at max 20 years old, was on the floor trembling with fear, and not only did they emptied her purse that was nowhere to be found, but the guy..he was reaching for the button of her jeans, obliviously trying to take them off. In that moment, looking at the girl's eyes, something inside henry snapped.

He started kicking the guy that was beating him, aiming his crotch, due to it being the weakest spot he could thing of, and thanks to his superpower he was so fast that the mugger fell on the ground, tears pocking his eyes. Then he stepped on the foot of the other behind him so that he could free himself from his grip, kicking him in the stomach so that he would back away, buying himself time for sprinting to the last one, taking him off the poor girl and starting punching him so hard that he broke his nose. Unfortunately the guy still had the knife with him, but henry didn't seem to notice that, too focused on protecting the girl behind him that was tapping something on her phone, hopefully calling the police. He needed to get her safe, even if his face hurt like hell and he probably had a broken nose too. He launched himself on the guy and they started fighting, trowing punches and kicking at every chance they got, henry hit with everything he had and he was faster than anything they ever saw. But there was a limit to his speed, and if you kept in mind that henry didn't eat for more than a day, you could see that he was starting to slow down without realizing, but his enemies saw it. And even if they were indeed exhausted, the one twice his size managed to grab his arms again after hitting him in the head.

Henry was too tired to move, and for a moment he didn't realize what happened. But he could definitely feel it, he could feel the stinging pain that spread in his body. With an awful sound the mugger extracted the blade from his side, blood started draining his blue shirt while white spots covered his vision, everything became blurry and it was like the time stopped for what felt like an eternity. The ringing in his ears was so loud he didn't hear the beeping sound of the sirens attached to the police cars. But he could see that the guy with the knife started to run in a panic, screaming at the other to follow him. And that's when he realized it

 

𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘦𝘥.

 

Not even a second later the multiple police cars pulled over, as the criminal that had a hold of the boy dropped him, henry immediately stated to fall,

Except he didn't hit the ground.

Two strong arms caught him, and the familiar blu of his mentor's suit came to his vision. He looked up, but he wish he didn't. Ray's eyes were full of panic, pure panic mixed with pain, concern and...

was that rage? Was he mad? No, he couldn't-

"What the hell are you doing here?! Are you insane??!!" He yelled at him, he wasn't just mad, he was 𝘧𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴, even if it was clear that his voice broke mid talking because of the worry in his eyes.

But henry didn't answer him, he couldn't even stand. And in a fraction of second he lost consciousness, becoming limp in captain man's arms, who lifted him up keeping his kid close to his chest while he rushed to the ambulance. They had to patch him up before ray could take him to the man cave, trusting Schwoz more than any doctor on the planet. And in that moment, while he stared at the mess those pieces of shit did to the kid he swore to protect, all that blood and bruises he had...Ray wanted to kill each one of them, limp by limp. Because they made him fear for a moment that he would've lost him, lost the only one that mattered to him.

They should be grateful that the cops were here. Or he didn't know what he could've done.

Chapter Text

Ray was sitting on the couch, he drove henry home and was back at the man cave for a while now. He couldn't get his mind off the kid, something was up. Why was he so worried about getting home? He could literally see the fear in his eyes when he asked him to stay overnight, and on the ride back he was so nervous ray was afraid that if he spoke the kid would've had a heart attack.

But that wasn't the only reason ray was lost in his thoughts in the middle of the night. When henry was tense he would always pick at his nails, he had that bad habit ray supposed was because of anxiety, and that's when he saw the tips of his fingers, they were dried with blood, he was sure of it. And he definitely didn't forget that the kid literally came to work with bruises all over this face, yep, something was definitely wrong, and he would've found out what even if that meant he had to ask henry directly the next day when he was at work. He knew henry would get anxious and maybe he wouldn't tell him but it was worth to try. Ray fell asleep on the couch while trying to figure out what was happening with his kid.

He jolted awake when he heard the emergency call set off, meaning someone was in trouble. Ray didn't even remember falling asleep, he got off the couch and reached the monitors answering the call.

"Hello? This is captain man's hotline what's your emergency?" he asked sleepy, it was 5:45, not exactly the time the woke up normally.

"Captain man? I'm here with kid danger, he's fighting some guys and- and they tried to rob-" he could hear the voice of the woman on the phone trembling with fear and clear emergency, but he had to cut her off

"what? Kid danger? Ma'm I think you've made a mistake" It didn't made sense, henry didn't know if there was an emergency unless Ray called him. Did that mean he was out by himself before she called him? He hoped she was wrong, she had to be. He didn't want to belive that henry would've jump in a fight without calling him first, he knew the kid, at least he thought he did.

"I swear it's him, please come quick, I already called the cops but he's wounded and I don't know if he can make it before they get here. Please." He knew when someone was in danger, and when they were desperately asking for help. He could feel it, but he still hoped henry wasn't there because if it was true, the boy was in deep, deep troubles.

 

He arrived to the scene at the same time as the police, let's just say the lady wasn't lying like he wished she was. He sprinted towards henry as soon as he got there but it was too late, he saw that jerk deepening the knife into Henry's side while the other criminal had a grip on him, at the moment the guy was trying to get away, dropping the kid that almost hit the floor.

But he caught him.

He grabbed him by the arms so he could use Ray as a support, he was covered in blood. His lip was split, his face was covered in bruises and he definitely had a broken nose.

"What the hell are you doing here?! Are you insane??!!" he yelled at him, henry raised his head, sending ray an apologetic look and it seemed like he wanted to say something, but not even a moment later he fell into his arm.

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘥.

Did He seriously thought he could fight three guys at once without his help? Why didn't he call him and why was he there in the first place? It was 6 in the morning and his house was at least a 10 minutes walk far away. He didn't want to think about it but obviously henry snuck out of his house early in the morning. While he had school? Ray needed to talk to him as soon as possible, henry crossed a line. Running in dangerous situations like that..god they stabbed him, he could've..

He wouldn't let this happen anymore, didn't matter if henry was okay with it or not. He picked him up rushing him to the ambulance.

The paramedics did their best patching him up, now he needed to take him to schwoz immediately. He carried the kid to the car, placing him in the back seat so that he could be more comfortable, then he took the driver seat and called schwoz while starting the car.

"Ray?" he answered with his strong accent

"hey schwoz, I need you to prepare the mad bay, fast" he said, voice trembling.

"what? Did something happen to henry?" he could feel schwoz getting worried because of the cracks in ray's voice

"they..he was.." he couldn't get himself to tell him, he didn't want to believe it and he knew that it was his fault. If only ray would've got there in time none of this would've happened.

"Just get the mad bay ready, it's bad" he gripped the wheel, feeling sick at the sight of the blood on his hands, Henry's blood. His vision was blurring, he just hoped schwoz would've fix this.

"Understood, be quick ray"

"I will" he said pressing the accelerator and ending the call.

 

"Is he gonna be okay?" ray asked his friend, it's been an hour since he brought henry back to the man cave, schwoz had just finished treating Henry and had left the mad bay, he gave him a nervous look before he talked

"he's fine ray, but there's something I need to tell you"

The beeping sound of the machines was the first thing henry heard when he opened his eyes. He could feel the pain in his side, he remembered ray being the last thing he saw before passing out so he had to be in the man cave. He woke up 2 minutes ago but his heart already felt heavy in his chest, he was sure Ray was pissed now, he knew how much he worried when it came to "superhero things" so watching him passing out due to a stab wound wasn't clearly the best thing. But he wanted to see him anyway, so he got out of bed and exited the mad bay making his way to the main room, just to find Ray leaning on the console. As soon as he saw the kid he sprinted towards him and wrapped his arms around henry, so tight that he almost left him breathless but still careful not to hurt him.

"Henry! Jesus kid, you scared the shit out of me" he said, ray never hugged him like that because he was afraid to be clingy. So henry knew he really did scare him, and he tried to hide how guilty he felt about it.

"I'm okay ray" henry spoke after a while, hoping to reassure the other even if every inch of his body hurt like hell

"what were you thinking henry? Jumping into a fight you clearly couldn't win!" he said, voice shifting from relieved to serious in an instant while he took two steps back and crossed his arms.

Here it comes, he hated when ray basically scolded him like he was the reckless thirteen years old kid he used to be when he first met him, sometimes he had the feeling that ray didn't realize henry wasn't a child anymore

"they were attacking that girl! What did you excepted me to do? Sit there and watch?" he said starting to lose his patience, he had a headache, his side was literally burning like the blade was still there and he was exhausted. He didn't eat or sleep properly in days, he didn't want to fight with him because he just did what he thought was right. He was a hero, he had the right to interfere when something like that happened and if he got hurt so what? It's not like he died or something, it wasn't that big of a deal goddammit.

"You should've called me!" he yelled, like that was obvious, like it should've been the first thing to cross Henry's mind

"why do you care so much?!" henry yelled back, he just wanted him to stop, stop acting like he didn't just do his job like they did everyday

"they 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘦𝘥 you henry! And I had to carry you praying that you would've make it!" his voice made clear that carrying the boy while he was unconscious was the most gut wrenching thing ray did in all his career as a hero.

Well..he had a point, henry stayed silent not sure how to react, and ray took it as a lead to keep talking

"what if somebody died tonight? Different story cause that's on 𝘺𝘰𝘶"

he said, pain clear in his voice

"and if you die, I feel like that's on me"

that took henry by surprise, did he really feel that way? He thought that what happened was his fault? He could feel the sense of guilt that he tried to shut down so bad devouring him, creating a deep void in his chest. He hated how much he cared, he hated it.

"I..I'm sorry I scared you" he finally said after a moment. Tears forming at the sides of his eyes but he wouldn't dare to let them fall.

"What were you doing there in the first place?" ray asked, he could feel his concern in his bones.

Damn it, he couldn't tell him all the truth. He never talked to him about his nightmares, he was too scared to do it.

"I was just walking" he answered, he knew where this conversation was going and he was already panicking. He didn't want to do this, not now. But he knew that one way or another ray would've found out because he saw trough all his lies

"at 6 in the morning on a school day?" ray asked annoyed, he knew he wasn't saying the whole truth, and henry stayed silent. He couldn't tell him even if he wanted to, it was like his lips were glued together and he felt a knot in his throat.

"What's going on with you hen?" ray asked, he was worried sick. But he couldn't say anything, he didn't have the gut to open up, what if he found out about his father? He didn't want to go into foster care, his mother would've never let him go with her, and if ray would've found out how miserable he was he didn't know if he would've been able to ever look at him again, ray knowing even the slightest thing was his worst nightmare.

"What do you mean" he answered, clearly avoiding the question, his anxiety was killing him but he had to stay focused

"you don't know what I mean?"

"I really don't, ray." he said, he needed to pretend everything was fine, he had to. He knew Ray could see that he was lying, but nothing prepared him for the awareness of how much his boss really knew.

"What happened to your arms?"

 

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵?

Henry could feel his entire system shutting down, his mind froze. Everything stopped for a second and he was sure his heart skipped a beat.

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭?

Not even a moment later it was the complete opposite. His head was about to explode for how much panic invaded his mind, he'd never been so afraid of the look of someone. It was like an alarm snapped in his brain and everything was so loud he couldn't function properly. Did ray..did he-..did he figured it out? Just like that? How was that possible?

𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰𝘥

 

How- how did he-

Henry instinctively looked at his-...oh fuck. He didn't realize that he was wearing a black short-sleeves shirt, and there was bandages. Bandages all over his fucking arms. How could this happen? Why? Why did they look at his arms? What the hell made them thing they could do that?!.

Henry felt like he was going to die on the spot, that was literally the worst thing that could've happened, it was worse than finding out about his father.

"how.." he was speechless. He didn't know what to say, he couldn't even lie anymore, ray would've never believed him. Was he mad at him? What if he was going to tell his father? Was he going to fire him? Henry was definitely panicking now, his breath wasn't steady, the room was spinning and the pain in his side wasn't helping at all

"schwoz had to check if there were other wounds, so he took your shirt off." his boss gently explained

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬

He couldn't think- fuck he was going to die, he was sure of it. His vision was completely blurred and his thoughts were completely out of control. He felt like a deer in the middle of the streets at night, with bright headlights pointing at him making sure he knew that they caught him, that whatever he did from now on was useless because they knew everything that was written in his eyes and carved in his skin.

"I..-" he wanted to get out of there. Ray was so upset but he didn't mean it, he didn't mean any of this! He wasn't supposed to find out, and now he did and he didn't know what to do- he felt awful, he felt so guilty. He didn't want his father figure to be involved in his problems, henry knew that if he found out how bad it really was he would've left him like everybody did.

"Henry..." Ray looked at him like he was scared the kid was going to pass out again, witch could be an option since he felt worse than when they stuck a blade in his flesh.

He hated that look, he didn't need anyone's pity, he was fine. And he knew ray didn't care that much so what was the point? Why didn't he drop the act already?

"are you harming yourself? On purpose?" ray didn't want to belive it, he hoped this was all a mistake but deep down he always feared something like this would've came out. But, yeah, he never thought it was that bad, he wanted to belive that henry had little bruises on his arms from little arguments with other kids at schools, and that was why he covered arms. Ray was going to ask anyway but he feared henry would've got mad.

"What?! Of course I'm not" he knew he did that on purpose, he had the feeling for a while even if he wasn't sure, but now that he saw it he wasn't going to step back. He wanted to help him at all cost

"don't lie to me kid" he said, aware of all the walls henry had, and determined to break every inch of them

"it's none of your business, stay out of this" henry wasn't going to let that happen. Letting Ray in? So that he could see the mess that he really was? Absolutely not, if his boss thought it was so easy to let him talk he was wrong

"for how long did this thing go on?" ray kept asking questions, and henry kept avoiding them

"I told you it's not your problem, I can handle this" he said, he knew he wasn't handling anything. But he didn't want ray to know a thing about it, that was it

"quit avoiding my questions henry, please just talk to me" ray was starting to get tired, he just wanted to help him. When did the kid got so defensive?

"quit asking them then, I don't wanna talk" if ray didn't drop this conversation for another 30 seconds henry was going to loose it.

"I want to help you with whatever is going on with you, I don't care what you say. I don't want you hurting yourself anymore or coming to work like someone used you as their personal punching bag. This conversation isn't over until you understand that I'm done seeing you get hurt, doesn't matter who's the reason behind it."

And at that, henry was starting to feel his cheeks getting wet. Tears were falling and he didn't even notice. He hated this, he hated when people pretended to care about him because it made him feel like when he was a child begging for his father to love him. He didn't need anyone, witch was weird to say because he remembered wishing with all his heart that someone would've noticed him, noticed all the pain he was hiding and all the scars he had because of a bad coping mechanism. Because he couldn't take it anymore, watching Jake growing out of love with him and starting to hate his kid, hurt him, rejecting him. So at some point he came to the realization that he deserved it, he deserved to feel that pain and in some ways it helped him. The pain made him forget everything, it was like every issue would just vanish and his mind was finally free. That's why he didn't get Ray's concern, he was fine, he didn't need to stop, he didn't want to.

What it felt like ad endless time, but it was just a couple minutes alter, ray spoke again

"I just want to help you hen" voice filled with hope, hope that he would've let him in

"I don't need your help! I don't need you, I can do this myself" he snapped, he couldn't take it anymore. He just wanted to sleep and instead he had to stay here and listen to his boss rambling about all that "I can help you" " talk to me" shit. He didn't believe him, cause nobody could help him, he was a mess, not someone you can deal with by saying "just open up and everything will be fine" it didn't work like that, he didn't

"but you don't have to, henry! You don't have to be alone" ray yelled still trying to get the boy to understand, unsuccessfully

"I'm fifteen years old ray! I'm not five, I said I don't need you or your stupid help" at this point he didn't know what he was saying anymore, words came out before he could control it. He was so tired and mad he just wanted ray to stop all this crap

"I really don't care hen, you may not be five but you're still a kid" he said back, and it was true. He shouldn't be in that situation at his age, he was too young for all the pain he had. And ray wanted him to be happy, to live his teenage years without hurting like that, he hated to see him in that state. He was crying, he definitely wasn't sleeping and now he found out that he hurts himself? 𝘖𝘯 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦? He just wanted to know why, he worried about henry like he was his own son and he couldn't bare to see him like that, he loved him too much to do nothing about it, to just ask a question and drop it if he didn't want to answer.

"And so what? I can take care of myself!" he said, he was pissed

"and you call this taking care of yourself? Seriously henry? Cause I think you're just destroying yourself with your own hands, and why? Because you refuse help like it's going to kill you if you let your guard down for two goddamn seconds!"

He could see how much Ray was worrying about him and for a second he considered his words, but that feeling was gone as fast as it came.

"What is wrong with you?! Why are you so concerned?" henry yelled, he was crying again but he didn't know if by sadness or anger. He didn't know how to feel about all of this

"because it's not worth it to be in this state if I can help you! God henry you're just a kid of course I worry about you" ray tried to explain how much that kid meant to him, but it was useless. He didn't even know if henry was listening at this point, he understood his frustration but he honestly expected anything but the answer he gave him.

"Yeah but I'm not 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 kid Ray! You're not my father so stop acting like you are! Quit pretending like you care!"

The room fell into an endless silent, nothing like the storm of feeling that crashed in Henry's chest.

He regretted his words as soon as they left him. He felt like someone had a grip on his heart and was squeezing it just to cause him pain. Why did he say that? He didn't know it.

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬! 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥? 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘐- 𝘰𝘩 𝘨𝘰𝘥. Ray was going to hate him he knew it he was sure and there was nothinghecoulddobecausehe- he scre-

"Is this how it is?" Ray's voice was low, disappointment was written all over his face. And there was so much pain in his eyes henry wanted to trow up at the thought that he caused it. He wanted to deny everything, tell him that he was wrong and he didn't know what's gotten into him. That he was exhausted and had no control over his words. He wanted to scream how ray was more like a dad to him than his own.

But nothing came out, he was just staring at him petrified. Like he forgot how to speak.

And unfortunately, ray took it as a yes.

"You're right henry, I'm not you're dad."

𝘕𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘰- this couldn't be happening, say something say something sa-

"but I'm still you're boss" he said, his voice was something henry never heard. It was cold, sharp, without the softness and the love he was used to.

Henry wanted to shoot a bullet in his mouth. Ray wasn't just his boss, he was better than his father. He loved him like he loved no one, he couldn't loose him like this.

"ray-" he wanted to reason with him, talk to him. But his voice came like a whisper and ray didn't hear him.

"If something like this happens again, you're fired"

 

Henry swore he could feel something break inside him. As ray walked towards his bedroom and left him in the room, alone.

Chapter Text

It was 9 am when henry was on his way home. Technically he was still in time go to school, even if late. But you know, when you got a stab wound going to school isn't exactly the best idea, so here he was. The only bad thing was that he had to go through the door this time.

He hoped Jake wasn't there, he just wanted to eat something and then go to sleep. He wanted to forget the fight he had with Ray, his words still echoing in his head.

"𝘐𝘧 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥".

𝘍𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥

He couldn't believe it, his job was everything to him, 𝘳𝘢𝘺 was everything to him. He couldn't just loose it, loose 𝘩𝘪𝘮.

His mind felt like it was empty, to shocked to formulate what happened. Thoughts run in his head but he couldn't hear them, it was like he was numb to every feelings. He wished he would've woke up and everything that happened was just a nightmare. He was so tired, his side hurt from walking his way to the house and so did his arms, even if schwoz apparently patched them up. Tears formed on the sides of his eyes, he knew what he needed, 𝘸𝘩𝘰 he needed. But he tried to forget it, forget everything. He ran a hand to his face drying his eyes as he unlocked the door.

And jake was right in front of him

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬. 𝘊𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘦?

"I was waiting for you." he said, voice sharper than a blade

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘮

"what do you-" he tried to ask, but Jake cut him off

"I got another call from you're school, says you weren't there" jake's eyes were filled with hatred, his voice was calm but henry knew it was all a cover. The calmest he seemed the more pissed he was.

Henry stayed quiet, he was afraid to talk to him. When he acted like this every little things could've make Jake burst out, making him the most angry man he knew. Then he would've start hitting him, and henry learn that it was best to shut up, but not too much or he would've make him mad anyway.

The older man took his silence to keep talking

"Well, in fact you're here. Care to explain why? Mh?" he asked.

Henry could feel his body froze with fear, he couldn't move, he couldn't talk. But he had to get away from him. He looked at the top of the stairs, if only he could run to his bedroom. He didn't know if he could do that, his side hurt too much to run. But he had no choice, he also couldn't take to get more beat up in the state he was. He had to think.

He tried to talk, come up with an excuse. But nothing came out. He couldn't think properly, he was too hungry to think at anything besides food.

"Is this a joke to you henry? No really is it?" Jake was starting to loose his patience as he started walking towards the boy.

henry took 2 steps back, slowly moving so that he could stood at the lower step of the stairs, maybe he could've just slowly start to make his way up. But to his luck, the man noticed

"where do you think you're going?"

𝘚𝘩𝘪𝘵

He reached henry and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, trying to get him far from the stairs.

But henry had enough. He had an argument with ray, the worst argument in his life if you asked him. A random guy stabbed him in the street at 6 in the morning, he was hungry, tired and now he had to fight with his "father" too? No way, no way in hell.

He's always been afraid of him, and he still was of course, but he couldn't take it anymore. How in the world could he possibly manage to go to school? He was literally limping, he didn't even know how Jake didn't notice that. Or maybe he did and he just didn't care, which wasn't weird at all. He remembered half of his nightmares being about him, because of how much he scared him, or how terrified he was at the chance that he would hurt his little sister, what if the boy was at work and she ended up in trouble? He would've never forgave himself, he spent his childhood protecting her when his mom wasn't there. Piper was everything to him, he remembered her going in his bedroom when she couldn't sleep, he knew that she had trouble sleeping too. Even if he was the one that got hit, she was always forced to pretend nothing happened, or their father would've got her too. And the boy knew it was a lot to handle at 9 years old.

Henry didn't remember a single moment in his life that didn't got ruined by jake. He spent fifteen years living with constant fear, panic and anxiety just because of him, because of what he did to them.

That's why he cared about Ray so deeply, he was the opposite of his father. He was supportive, loving, caring...he couldn't remember a single time in his life where ray made him cry with fear, he'd never been afraid of him, ray never hit him, never screamed at him. He always made sure that henry was okay, that he didn't walk his way home when it was dark, he always hugged him when he noticed something was wrong, but he didn't push him If henry didn't want to talk about it. He always ran to ray if something was wrong, and he was there for him, every single time.

"𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘥"

He wanted to cry, because 𝘩𝘦 said that to him, he was the one that pushed him away just because he wanted to help him. He was sure ray didn't want to see him anymore. Not after he said those horrible things to him, would he ever see ray again? What if he fired him before henry could mess things up again? He hated himself, ray was also the only one that noticed everything about him, how much he was hurting.

He just wanted to sleep. He didn't care what Jake said, he surely wasn't going to school. So when he started to drag him away from the stairs, he tried to free himself from his grip.

For the first time in fifteen years, henry was finally fighting back

"let me go!" he yelled, fixing his feet to the ground

"shut up! I'm sick of this behavior. You're going to school, end of discussion!"

But henry wasn't going to drop it

"I'm not going to school! I don't care what you say." he spoke, all the panic he was feeling was clear in his voice.

His father's eyes darkened, If a glare could kill he would've been dead.

"what did you just said?" his voice voice was low, dangerously low. As he stopped dead in his tracks.

"I'm not going to school" he said like a whisper, but it was enough to get Jake to drop his grip. Just to receive a punch on the face with the same hand. Henry took a step back from the impact.

"School should be the only thing that matters in you're life, the one that you're wasting being the useless son you are!" jake words were like venom, but even if he could feel them chocking him, he was used to it. Used to being treated like garbage from his own father, in his own house. He hated how it still hurt to hear this type of things even after years and he didn't know what brought Jake to act this way towards him

But one thing was sure.

"I'm not your son." he said, voice barely a whisper, his body trambling with fear once again.

Jake heard him, and he stared at him with horror in his eyes. Before walking to him, fists clenched.

"say that again." he told him, rage in his voice masked with how quiet it was

"I'm not your son 𝘫𝘢𝘬𝘦!" he snapped, tears in his eyes.

He couldn't deal with this shit anymore. He was done listening to him rambling about how disappointed he was, when henry would literally neglect himself everyday, just so everyone around him could be safe. He felt like he wasn't even living anymore, at this point he just tried to get to the end of the day without going insane. He couldn't care less about what he thought of him, didn't matter that now he was crying in front of who was supposed to be his dad. Jake was nothing to henry, he never was and never will be.

"you're crying? Really? For God's sake henry you're a man!" he yelled at him.

Henry just turned around and started to make his way up the stairs, trying to walk the fastest he could. Jake didn't follow him, but he kept talking.

"and don't you ever dare to say that again!" he was practically growling.

"do you understand me? I'm you're 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 henry!" the boy just pretended he didn't hear him, as he reached his bedroom and slammed the door behind him, locking it.

As soon as his back was on the door, his legs collapsed. They were trembling so much he couldn't stand. His breathing wasn't steady, his heart was exploding. His head was hurting so bad and he had a heavy feeling in his chest, it weighed him down. It was the first time he stood up from Jake, and the anxiety he didn't feel before, crashed all at once creating the worst panic attack he ever had.

He couldn't breathe properly, he couldn't think. nobody in that house ever dared to talk back at him. And now he almost picked a fight with him? Yelling in his face that he wasn't his son? He knew jake, he knew that the only reason why he didn't do anything to henry, was because he was too shocked to process what he said to him. But as soon as he would've got out of his room, he would've 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 him. Of course he would've, beca--

"𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘐 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘳"

Henry just kept panicking, he remembered his words. He was definitely going to die, he was sure of it. And if things got out of hand he couldn't even go to ray. He wasn't going to save him this time. He felt so lost and without hope, he couldn't do anything but cry.

Henry cried until there weren't any tears left. He was so exhausted and he just wanted ray, but he screw up everything he had with him. And God he was so 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘳𝘺, he couldn't even go downstairs to the kitc-

Wait, suddenly henry stood up, black spots came to his vision but he ignored them. He walked to his backpack close to the end of the bed, opening it.

𝘠𝘦𝘴! 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦. There was some sort of sandwich he made a couple days ago for school, for some reason he ended up not eating it, but right now? He was starving. He ate the whole thing in less than a minute, it wasn't much but it was enough. Then he just got on the bed, after taking his shoes off, and as soon as his head hit the pillow he was fast asleep. His last thought being the hope that ray would've called him, saying that he was waiting for him to go to work. Then henry would've show up and hug him like nothing happened, maybe in the end it was just a nightmare.

 

Speaking of him, ray was sitting on the chair close to the computers. checking if there were any emergencies, but his mind was elsewhere.

"𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝘬𝘪𝘥 𝘙𝘢𝘺! 𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦!"

everytime he remembered Henry's words, he could feel a knot in his chest. Ray didn't realize that he basically started acting like he was the kid's parent, and he felt horrible about it. Who was he to act that way? But the worst thing is that he probably made henry feel trapped, by asking him that many questions. And he hated that he made hi-

𝘵𝘩𝘦 kid uncomfortable, he had no right to do that. But he couldn't stop worry, for how long did henry harm himself like that? Every seconds that passed ray just kept getting more concerned, he hated that henry wasn't in the room, so that he could keep an eye on him. He just had to wait till he showed up for work, even if he would've never let him go on patrol, schwoz still had to check his wound. Another thing ray couldn't stop thinking about, why in the world was he "walking" there so early that day? He hated that henry kept so many things from him. He just wanted to help him.

He knew that he wasn't Henry's father, of course he knew it. But he couldn't help but feel disappointed when he said that, he couldn't explain why, he just felt rejected in a way. He just hoped henry would've show up, saying that he regretted his words. That way Ray could've hug him and make sure that he was okay, that he didn't hurt his self in any way again. He swore that from now on he would've checked him, everytime he saw him. He really hoped henry was okay, even if ray was a bit mad at him, the kid was still his sidekick and superpowers or not, he couldn't just jump into a fight like that. He literally ended up in one of the worst way possible, he had to wait for an hour before he knew henry was fine, but to ray it felt like a decade. He couldn't bare to see the boy hurt like that, what if he would've been late? What would've happened?

He needed to make sure henry understood that.

It was now 16:30, henry should've been here anytime. For a moment ray thought he wouldn't show up, but he heard the doors of the elevator open.

But still, it wasn't the boy he waited for the whole day that walked into the room. It was Charlotte.

"hey ray" she greeted, looking around the man cave, like she was looking for someone.

"Hi Charlotte, where's henry?" he asked, walking towards her.

"uh, you tell me. He wasn't at school so I thought he was here with you" she told him. Ray couldn't help but feel anxious, now he refused to show up to work? Really? The kid had a terrible injury, it wasn't the time to play the "I'm mad at you so I'll ghost you till I can't anymore" game.

but he could guess why he wasn't here. Ray let out a frustrated sigh.

"Did something happened between you two?" she asked, when ray was that anxious it was always because something happened to henry. And of course she figured it out in an instant, in the end, Charlotte was one of the smartest kid he knew.

"So...here's the thing"

Ray explained what happened that day, how henry was stabbed by some muggers, and the argument they had. Of course he didn't tell her about his self harming, he figured henry didn't want anyone to know about it.

"and that's it, I was hoping he would've show up today. He has to change the bandages and stuff, but I'm glad he didn't go to school." he said, still on edge for the boy that wasn't in the room with them.

"yeah me too" Charlotte told him, she looked shaken. She was obviously worried about her best friend, ray knew how much she cared about henry.

"it's not just that char, I think there's something wrong with him" he said, concern in is voice.

"why would he be in the streets at that time? And the fact that he looks like a ghost? He's always tired, he looks like he doesn't eat, and he's always distracted"

Charlotte stayed silent, letting Ray open up about all the worries he had when it came to henry.

"I think it's because of his job" he said, finally letting out the theory that felt more like a weigh on his shoulders. In the end, 𝘳𝘢𝘺 gave this job to Henry. If this was really the reason, it was indeed his fault.

"his job?" Charlotte asked, surprised

"what if I put too much pressure on him, and that's why he fought those guys without calling me? Maybe he wanted to impress me Charlotte, think about it. He must be so stressed out that he doesn't sleep or eat anymore." Ray told her

What if 𝘩𝘦 was the reason henry cut himself? And that's why he didn't wanna tell him?

Just thinking about it made his stomach twist. Thoughts started running in his head, he didn't have any other reasons to think of, it made so much sense. And he felt worse than before.

"it's not your fault ray" she told him, voice soft.

But ray didn't answer, he couldn't stop thinking about it.

"okay, I've had the same thought for a long time. I know henry isn't in his best state, and I tried to talk to him but he pushed me away so many times, I stopped. I was afraid he wouldn't talk to me anymore." she explained to him, remembering all the times henry slept through classes, refused to eat at school and looked like all the light he had was sucked out of him.

"but it's going to be okay ray, let me talk to him" Charlotte proposed

"I'll go to his house, I'll tell him that if he doesn't show up here you'll send schwoz to check his side. Sounds good?" she said, knowing that henry couldn't let home someone his parents didn't know about

"yeah, thank you char" Ray smiled at her, she returned the smile and started walking to the elevator.

 

Henry woke up at 3 pm, blinking a few times annoyed by the light in the room. He changed to a sitting position, rubbing his eyes.

As soon as he was fully awake he reached to his phone in the nightstand. As he expected , ray didn't call him. He didn't even know if he should go to work, what if ray didn't want him there? He couldn't blame him, it was Henry's fault anyway.

"𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝘬𝘪𝘥 𝘙𝘢𝘺!"

Everything he said to him wouldn't leave his mind. Why did he say that? He could never forget the look on rays face, God he looked so betrayed. But what he said wasn't the worst part

"𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘥"

It was 𝘳𝘢𝘺'𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳

The more he thought of it, the more it felt like his boss was 𝘭𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨. He felt like those words didn't come out of ray, they felt wrong.

"𝘐𝘧 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥" "

That was possibly the most awful thing he heard from him. Henry always thought that he wasn't the best sidekick for captain man, yeah maybe now he had his superpower, but without it? What if something happened and he lost it? He always feared that his boss would've fire him in one way or another, and now he should be more sure than ever. But..it was like he couldn't convince himself this time because....somehow, ray seemed...𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 to him.

It's a thing henry always noticed, he couldn't help it. But it's like he never truly believed it. He always thought that maybe ray felt responsible for him, due to the boy being relatively young for a sidekick, and he wasn't indestructible unlike the hero. But it wasn't just that, sometimes Ray acted..like he was..a parental figure, almost like a father.

There was this one time, where he started being Ray's sidekick like a month before. It was his first time fighting crime at night, and it took a lot of time too, normally they were done after an hours max, but this time they stayed in the streets till 4 in the morning. Henry had school the next day and he was so tired, his eyes could barely stay open. Of course Ray noticed that, and after taking a look at him, he just smiled at Henry and proceeded to pick him up in his arms, carry him the whole way back to the store, and let him sleep the night at the man cave. Then, if that wasn't enough, the next day he even gave him a ride to school.

He could never forget that from that day, sometimes henry would've literally pretend to be asleep so that ray would pick him up. And it was obvious that half of the time his boss knew he wasn't really tired, but he carried him anyway. He remembered doing that trick for a whole year, until he fiscally became too big for Ray to carry him

"𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘬𝘪𝘥, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘪𝘨"

Memories of the night before came to his mind. Going to work right after the "argument" with Jake, because he feared Ray would've worry too much if he didn't go to work. Just to get the same scenario he wanted to avoid so much. But he knew that, facing reality, he 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 him to notice. He wanted him to realize something wasn't right, just..the moment he did notice, henry was too scared to tell him, to open up. He couldn't get himself to do that, even if that was the whole point, he felt horrible about it, because that way he really just scared ray, and nothing more. But he realized how much he needed him in that moment, that's why he tried to tell him. He wanted his boss to comfort him, hug him, and let him rest even for 10 minutes. And that's exactly what ray did.

He cared so much about him, henry knew that. But that was the point, it scared him. He was just afraid that if he did let his walls break, he would've regretted it. What if ray would've left him? He was sure he would've never recover from that. But was it really worth it? Being so defensive, and loosing the opportunity to let him help? To let him in, to let ray care for him. The opportunity to stop being so alone in everything he went through?

Well, there was no point now. He didn't have the chance anymore.

he kept remembering all the times his boss wasn't just his boss, he was the only one who could understand him, the one that got his back no matter what. He was always there for him, even if henry didn't want him to.

Just now he realized how much Ray cared, all the time he was so protective of him, from letting henry stay behind him when criminals would be too big, or when they had crazy weapons. To the point where he seemed personally affected at the knowledge of Henry's self harm.

He still felt guilty about that, he didn't know that ray would've cared so much, that's why the argument went that way. He wasn't ready for it, he didn't imagined he would've figured it out that way.

He felt horrible, the more the thought about it the more he wanted to hurt himself. He didn't deserve ray, he didn't deserve any of this. He was right to hurt like that, he deserved it.

He literally treated him like garbage, yelling every awful thing that came to his mind. How could he do something like that? Of course Ray didn't call him, why would he want to see him? He didn't even know why he didn't already fired him.

He didn't actually recall everything that happened the moments later, it felt like a memory

His head was spinning, tears were falling from his eyes. His mind was empty as he stared at the blood dripping down his arm.

Chapter 5

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Henry was on the floor of his closet, he didn't even know how he got there, everything that happened was like a fever dream. The room was quite dark, except for the light that came from the crack of the door. Which didn't help with the sense of unreality that the boy was trapped into, like he was stuck in his own mind.

At the same time, his whole system shut down, like he wasn't feeling anything beside the familiar void nailed in his chest. His eyes were drained from every sort of light, as he stared at the bloody mess he made. He couldn't even see the damages he did to his left arm, due to it being covered by a sheet of crimson.

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥?

He couldn't actually recall much from his memories, like he just snapped out of his brain for a moment and ended up...like this.

𝘋𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴?

It wasn't much of a question, he already knew the answer. 𝘖𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 he did, because it always ended up this way. He was thinking about Ray, how the stubbornness of his actions leaded him to rot, hoping this was just a fucking joke. Him being the reason they were apart, mad at each other, was ray mad at him? In each case, henry knew that ray wouldn't be more angry at him than the boy already was. He couldn't stand all the hatred towards his person, that led him to hurt himself once again, which only made him feel worse, because if you think about it, this was the reason henry got so defensive.

Because his mentor found out. And when ray switched the conversation into that way henry couldn't think straight anymore. He was in so much panic everything was blurred from anxiety. Because just the thought that he saw what he did, or just that he knew it was enough for henry to snap. He and ray argued almost regularly, it was just how they were. Ray was always scolding him if he got hurt because of his recklessness or because he didn't call for help just to "prove that he could do it himself" as ray stated, at witch henry realized it was quite true, he was always trying to impress the other, and he believed that the hero knew it and that's why he always got so mad, admitting that he didn't want the boy to get hurt for this "useless bullshit".

And sometimes henry would seem to get annoyed by his overprotective behavior. But in reality he just didn't want to get him mad or concerned over him, he didn't want to disappoint ray, if anything he tried to do the opposite basically everyday.

So it wasn't so strange that they argued a couple times. But actually 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 like they did? That never happened. He never yelled at him like that, just rethinking of everything he said to ray made him want to smash his head backwards into the wall behind him. Did ray actually wanted him gone? Was he being merciful or he already decided that he wanted to fire him? Just the fact that he would've possibly never see him again...

He breathed sharply, his vision blurred from tears again.

His hands were trembling, as he couldn't help but sink the blade into his skin again. He couldn't help it, it was the only thing that stopped him from going insane, from actually believing that ray didn't care for him anymore, that he hated him, that he screw everything up and there was no way he could go back. He let him down, he couldn't forget the pain in his eyes as he told him that he...wasn't his father, he just couldn't, cause those words probably hurt him as much as they hurt ray.

His arm just kept getting worse, everything that haunted henry was making it's way to his mind like a non-stopping train. He disappointed him, he deserved this. How could he do that? Pushing him away, like he wasn't the only person that could've reach henry when he didn't want anyone to get to him? He didn't want that, he didn't want him to go away, even if he started it. But now Ray seemed so far from him, that he didn't know how to get him back, how to stop feeling like he lost him.

Each bloody line he created represented all the feelings he couldn't speak. Cause It wasn't true that he didn't feel a thing, he felt everything. Every cut was meant to free all the pain he had, but in reality, he was just trying to shut it all down, by making sure he was too blinded by pain, that he could forget what he was really feeling, focusing on the way his arm burned so much he couldn't think of anything else. Cause that's what he wanted to do, burn down every little thing, and maybe he could've forget the regret of his own words eating him alive, making sure there was nothing left of him but the memory of his body burning with pain.

tears kept falling, there was so much blood and his head started spinning. It hurt so much he could barely move it. He couldn't think, his mind was overwhelmed by all the pain he was feeling.

He had to get up, but his legs were trembling and his side was giving him nightmares. Every time he had a bad injury, ray would've let him stay at the man cave a couple of days so that he could've check on him. If maybe he couldn't walk properly or he had a broken bone, when they weren't lethal but there was no way he could've convince Ray to just let him go home, like he usually tried to do. But this time he basically ran home as soon as the hero wasn't in the room with him anymore, and he was starting to feel it.

He just wanted to stay on the floor, close his eyes and hopefully ray would've show up at his door, saying that he forgave him for what he told him, that he knew he didn't mean it. And then he would've hugged henry reassuring him that everything would've been fine and they were going to fix it all.

But ray wasn't anywhere near his house, near 𝘩𝘪𝘮. Henry knew that.

His hero wasn't going to rescue him, as the boy bleed on the floor, unable to find the strength to get up.


But, a couple a minutes later, he was able to find that strength as soon as he heard the ring bell, and piper's shouting from downstairs.

"henry!! It's Charlotte!!"

𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦!? 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬?!

He instantly panicked, as he suddenly stood up from the floor, witch caused his legs to give up for a second. But that wasn't important right now, Charlotte was here and he had to be fast enough and try to hide the fucking mess he made.

Bandages, he needed bandages.

He remembered having the ones that schwoz used at the man cave, he had to take them off in order to-..

 

He closed his eyes by instinct, he didn't wanna think about it, there was no time now.

He took a breath, and started to scan the room searching for them. His eyes landed on the floor, they were there...well..at least what was left of them.

Apparently, he ripped them off.

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬

He didn't have time to carefully take off the ones that were on his other arm. He actually didn't have time to do anything at all

"Henry? Are you there?" this time it was Charlotte who yelled.

𝘚𝘩𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵

He sprinted at the back of the room, opening the drawer and quickly putting aside the clothes that were there, grabbing something at the end of it.

He always kept some extra bandages just in case. He un rolled it out and started to cover every single slash. He didn't have time to find scissors so he just used all of it. In theory, it would've been fine like this.

So He just walked out of the closet. Putting on the first hoodie he found, and unlocked the door of his bedroom.

"I'm here."

His voice was low, cold. He wasn't letting anything out, like he alway did. Because Charlotte didn't have to notice a thing, even if he was fighting with all he had to not break down crying, crying by the physical pain of how many slashes were violently carved in his skin. All the hatred he felt for himself, written in cuts.

He walked down the hallway until he was standing at the top of the stairs, eyes locking with his friend's, as she climbed the stairs.

"About time" she greeted him with a smile, even if he could see the concert written in her face.

"Alright guys, I'm gonna head over to Marla's" piper said, looking at henry. "I'll see you tomorrow hen" she concluded, but there was unspoken words in her eyes as she stared at her brother.

Wich didn't go unnoticed by Charlotte.

"Have fun pips" henry forced a reassuring smile to his sister, trying to shake off her worries.

Piper walked towards the door and exited the house, as soon as she left, Charlotte's face became more serious.

"I need to talk to you" she said, visibly shaken by the state his friend was in. He really did look like a ghost.

Henry didn't actually expected it, but he knew deep down that Charlotte wasn't going to stay out of this, just because he asked her to. She was the first person to notice that something was going on with him, and even if henry didn't want her to do anything, he couldn't expect it to be that easy. They were best friends, of course she cared

Henry didn't answer, he didn't know what to say. He obviously couldn't escape this, but he didn't even have the energy to talk. As he was about to say something, maybe convince her that they would've talked the next day at school, maybe during lunch break. Charlotte spoke again

"It's about Ray"

 

𝘙𝘢𝘺?       


They were now in Henry's room, sitting on his bed. Henry had his gaze down on his hands, that were currently fidgeting with the lace of his hoodie, meanwhile Charlotte had her eyes fixed on the boy, trying to figure out what was going on in that head of his.

Henry was surprised at first, he indeed expected his friend to show up at his door at some point, Charlotte never was the type to just let him suffer by himself, so he knew that eventually she would've want to talk to him about that. But ray being the topic of the conversation? Henry didn't even think about the chance of Charlotte being involved in their argument, if that's the reason she's here.

"So...what about him?" henry asked, eyes still glued to his hands.

"He's worried about you hen" she said, "and I'm worried too" Charlotte added, speaking her thoughts.

Henry's eyes widened for just a second, before he steadied himself immediately. Ray was worried? He stayed silent for a while, but thinking about it, of course he was. It was so stupid of henry to think he wouldn't be concerned, he knew that. But cmon, it clearly wasn't his fault, sometimes his whole over thinking everything blurred away what was supposed to be obvious.

So of course he didn't think that ray would've worry, as he mentally slapped himself for his obvious dumbness.

"He is?" he asked, knowing the answer, his voice uncertain.

"Are you serious?" Charlotte leaned her head to the side, trying to get a better look of his face. Ray talked to her for 40 minutes straight about how much he cared for Henry and how worried he was. And that boy didn't even 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 of it?

"You know how much he cares about you. When you didn't show up at work he basically freaked out" she tried to explain, recalling the talk she had with the man earlier in the evening.

But henry didn't get this, so he wasn't mad? He literally walked out of the room the very same day saying that he would've possibly fire him. That sentence was literally haunting him for hours, and ray on the other hand, was freaking out because he wasn't at work? What did he even expected? For him to show up like nothing happened?

"But why?" he didn't know what to think of it.

"Why? Because you've been 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘦𝘥 henry!, that's why! You could've 𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘥!" she snapped, getting quite mad at him for being too stubborn to understand what was literally obvious.

Her voice shifting from dead serious to basically yelling, made henry raise his gaze, eyes now looking at his friend's.

It wasn't weird that ray told her about that, henry assumed the man needed someone to talk about how what happened scared him to death. And he didn't blame him for that, beside, he didn't got problems with Charlotte knowing anything.

"You need to go to the man cave. That's why I'm here" Charlotte was surprised at the boy locking his eyes with hers, but she didn't let it distract her from the reason she was it that room. Henry needed to get to ray.

Henry didn't move an inch, but she saw his eyes flinch at the mention of anything related to the hero.

"Yeah..not gonna happen" he said, voice sharper than a knife, trying to hide how his chest hurt at the thought of ray, and the fact that he wouldn't see him.

He wasn't going anywhere, it wasn't that he didn't want to see ray...he didn't want 𝘳𝘢𝘺 to see 𝘩𝘪𝘮. Specially because he relapsed, and unfortunately, he knew ray, he knew that he was going to see through him, reading his eyes and living in his mind. He didn't want the man to see him in that state, or henry feared he would've broke down every wall that he built so far, just to feel the warmness of the man's arms, and the safety of his words.

Because he 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 to see ray, but he couldn't let that happen. He didn't want him to know how horribly messed up his "little habit" became. He didn't want ray to worry more than he already did. And he didn't know if he was ready to face him so early, like...all the things he said, he didn't want to face yet how disappointed ray was.

"Oh so what did you expect us to do? Sit there and do nothing, while you're out there with a damn slash in your side? Henry this is getting out of control. You need to stop with this shit." he never saw Charlotte so mad, she was clearly tired of seeing her best friend refuse every help offered, he may though that he didn't need it, or deserved it, but she cared about him and she was done seeing him lying to everyone that he was okay when he was literally destroying himself. She wasn't going to stay silent anymore, even if henry didn't want to talk about his personal issues, him not giving a fuck about a stab wound meant crossing a line.

"You know" she said, taking a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second "ray blames himself", she said, sadness in her gaze fixed on the boy once again.

Charlotte let the room fell into silence, as henry processed her words. Not wasting time trying to hide the pain in his eyes.

He just hoped that he heard the wrong thing. As the statement of his boss blaming himself made his stomach ache.

He was speechless. That couldn't been real, why would he do that? Because of the fight he had with those guys? But there was no rea-....

 

𝘖𝘩

Suddenly, memories of their fight came into his mind, he couldn't forget Ray's face when he..found out. Could it be? Was he thinking that it was because of him? Or because of Henry's job?

Obviously, Henry's self-harm had nothing to do with anything related to ray, in fact, the man was one of the not so many reasons why henry didn't do it. He remembered the times going to work, or just being with Ray was a distraction to all the negative feelings in his head.

"w..what do you mean?" he asked Charlotte, maybe there was another reason? Maybe it wasn't what henry feared, but if it really was, then that meant Charlotte knew? What if Ray told her? Would he do that?.

If ray believed that it was his fault, the boy would've never forgave himself

"Please don't act like you don't know" she began, and henry could feel a knot of guilt forming in his throat, along with the anxiety that came with the chance of Charlotte knowing a little too much. But he hated lying to her, he was just so used to it that it came before he could think about it.

 

" Henry you don't eat, you clearly don't sleep. You basically look like a ghost. You need to stop pretending like you're fine when it's obvious that you're not"

The boy released a breath that he didn't know he was holding. At least she didn't know that. He thought, mentally thanking Ray.

"That's why ray is so concerned. You literally have a wound. Please, just come to the man cave" she asked him, trying to convince henry to just let them help him.

"I'm sorry char. But I can't" he said, praying that she would just give up and go away. But knowing at the same time that it would've never happen in a milion years.

"Then I'll let schwoz know that he can come over here, so that you don't have to move a finger." She told him, voice firm.

"𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵?!" henry immediately answered her, without thinking about it, raising his tone a bit with his eyes reveling his shock.

"You know he can't come here". The boy continued, voice more steady than before. There was no way. Right now Jake wasn't home, but he was going to be before schwoz could get here. And if his father found out he would've been furious. He didn't want other people in his house that weren't Charlotte or Jasper

"Yeah I know" she said, with a grin on her face.

 

𝘜𝘯𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦.

Henry was visibly stressed out, but then he thought about it. He didn't want to fight with his father again, or argue with Charlotte until she couldn't take it anymore and leave. Realizing it would've been bad if his wound wasn't treated properly, and he really didn't want to deal with another problem. He just gave in

"Fine"

Notes:

YOU THOUGHT that I abandoned this fic! But here I am🙈. I'm incredibly sorry for literally disappearing for nearly a month, and I know this isn't the best chapter, along with it being shorter than the other. Forgive me🙏, I just started school and I hope I can keep up with the updates, but I promise you that I'll try. Also THANK YOU SO MUCH for the 1000 hits!! I love you guys so much, take care💗💗💗💗

Chapter 6

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The whole ride to the man cave was silent, no one was talking, as henry stared at the window, the sun was going to set any minute while his last rays were hitting on the boy's brown/greenish eyes, who were currently deep in thoughts.

As henry agreed with Charlotte, saying he'll go to the store with her, she typed something on her phone, and proceeded to walk out of the room after giving him a grateful look, relived that he finally gave in. Henry stayed in there for a few minutes, sitting on his bed waiting for Charlotte to come back. She called her parents, assuming that henry (obviously) couldn't walk the whole way there, and asked them for a ride to work. He didn't know what she told them, since she already had gone to junk and stuff that day for work. He didn't question it, cause from the moment he told her that he was going to go, his mind was already drifting away starting his familiar train of thoughts, that stole him from reality blocking him in his own head.

That didn't stop when he was in the car, half way through the man cave, and he just didn't know what to think, or what he'll do once they were there. He didn't see or called ray the whole day, obviously, why would've he? Besides, the man didn't call him either..well, that's why he didn't want to go there in the first place. What would ray do? Was Charlotte lying, or was he really worried? Like, how much? Was he going to hug him? Or ignore him like nothing happened?

It just worried henry, 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩, that one day he would've saw that look of hatred that was permanently fixed in his father gaze, in the eyes of the man that he cared about so deeply, and that seemed to care about henry too.

Once again, he found himself to hope ray wasn't mad. He knew he wasn't going to be, he was sure of it. But this was one of the many scars Jake left, except they weren't in his body, they were carved in his whole system. He feared that ray would've hit him, scared him to death, that he would've threatened the boy if he didn't do what he wanted, and how he imposed it. He couldn't help it, when you grow up in a dysfunctional, abusive house, some things are stuck with you, and this was just how it was. He didn't control it, he couldn't control the anxiety he felt as they stepped out the car, and made their way to the building.


Henry expected ray to be worried, relived, maybe sad because he knew that he had a bad wound?, he thought that ray was going to bombard him with questions, saying that he needed to be careful and that he worried him so much, like he was usual to say. That he would've been with him the whole time schwoz was checking him, making sure that henry wasn't anxious of anything, by telling him that it was going to be okay. Maybe they would've talk things out about their argument, ray would've told him that he wanted him to stop harming himself, if he did that henry knew he would be crying his eyes out, opening up to ray and talking to him about how much it hurt, that he didn't even know if he was crying because of actual pain or because how much it destroyed him to see his family falling apart while he dreamed about being loved by his father. So that he had the chance to tell the man how much he thought of him as the only figure in his life capable of reassuring him, and that he would always run to ray when things got low and how many times he did and he didn't even realize it. Maybe ray would've tell him that he didn't blame the boy for what he said, that he would've never fire him because he cared too much to see him gone. Maybe even if ray didn't want to hug him they would've watched a movie like they always did when there was no emergency calls.

 

Or maybe not

 

Maybe instead, ray was going to be the maddest he ever saw him, maybe he was going to be so mad that he didn't even want to see him in his cave, that he would've send him away to an hospital just to see him out of his sight. And even if henry cried, letting out all the tears he could possibly have, he still wouldn't bat an eye while the boy begged him to just talk to him so that they would've fix everything the way ray alway told him about. Or henry would've just stayed silent, lips glued, while ray let his whole rage out on him, screaming at him, yelling the worst things he could think about, and henry would've just let him, not saying a word like he did with his father all his life. That way maybe ray would've been more calm and at least let him stay there for the time needed for schwoz to help him with the damn stab. The fucking stab that caused this whole fucking mess.

But even if he would've never forget it, and it would've caused a brand new trauma to the boy, he was fine with Ray being mad, maybe not like the worst of ways, but still mad

It would've been fine. Ray could've reacted in all the way possible, and henry was going to be okay with it, he would've forgive him accepting the consequences of his actions. Because he preferred Ray to be mad at him, he preferred Ray to be something, anything

But Ray wasn't even there

As henry walked to the man cave, expecting anything from the man the he would've find on the couch, or leaning against the console, or literally everywhere goddammit. Ray was nowhere to be found

He didn't even have the time to feel the familiar twist in his chest, cause looking at the room, he spotted a certain brunette walking out the door opposite of the elevator, near the console.

He, in fact, did not expect to see Jasper sprinting to his way as soon as he saw the boy.

"Henry! 𝘖𝘩 𝘨𝘰𝘥" he wrapped his arms around the young hero, closings his eyes, clearly relived to see his friend

Jasper was his best friend since they were five years old, and along with Charlotte he meant so much to henry. He knew that he was worrying too, since henry didn't even show up to school in the morning.

Henry was surprised at first, but he just hugged him back.

"Hey jasp" he greeted him, voice soft trying to calm down at least a bit of all the thoughts jasper must've had.

"Schwoz told me what happened, you don't know how much you scared me! Are you okay? Can you walk? How did you get here?" he started with his usual train of question, jasper couldn't really keep things to himself unlike henry, that basically hid everything he felt and thought all the time. Jasper was much more open about his feelings than henry ever was, so of course when it got to things like this, the brunette didn't even think twice before letting henry fully know how much he was scared that he got hurt. And henry tried everytime to reassure him, in the end he was a superhero's sidekick, so unfortunately getting hurt was kinda part of the job.

"Calm down curly" Charlotte spoke, making her appearance in the room while walking towards the boys. "My parents drove us here, don't need to stress yourself out". She told him playfully, causing the blonde kid to crack a smile.

"I'm fine man, don't worry about it" henry said stepping out from the hug. "don't want you to hurt your dummy head"

He told him as he ruffled his hair, earning a smile from Jasper. But henry could see that he was still concerned.

"I think we should go to the mad bay now" Charlotte told them, as they walked where schwoz would check on Henry.


The scientist needed concentration, his wound wasn't that bad, but Charlotte and Jasper still had to wait outside.

That's why there was only henry and schwoz in the white room, where the boy was currently sitting on the light/blue blanket of the cot. The walls of the bad bay, along with the light being bright white, made the whole room look like some sort of asylum. Henry was blinded by the too bright light every time he opened his eyes, that he was forced to close for how much pain it caused him to have a needle passing through his skin (apparently, his wound was a little bit open on the top, and he needed to do another stich or it wouldn't heal properly).

The burning feeling of the edges of his wound being reunited together, plus the several slashes on his arm sent , it hurt a lot. And while henry tried not to scream as schwoz fixed his stitches, he thought about how much easier it would've been if ray was here, like he wished he was for the whole day, only to be disappointed by the loneliness he felt as soon as he walked in the man cave. He just wasn't used to not seeing him for so long, and he knew it wasn't just that. He and ray didn't always see each other every single day, but they still were in touch or at least when they didn't it wasn't because they fought, wich was what happened this time. That's the difference, they weren't talking because they were both kinda mad at the other.

Or at least that's what henry thought about himself

Deep down, henry knew that he wasn't really mad. How could he be? When his stomach would have knots of pain just thinking of what he told ray that day.

Henry wasn't mad, because guilt was eating him alive, he thought that he didn't want to see ray but that wasn't it. He wanted to cry thinking that ray wasn't in the man cave because of their argument, he didn't want to see henry? Was that really the reason?

He must've been stuck in his thoughts, since he didn't notice schwoz started talking to him, until the scientist snapped his fingers in front of his face.

Henry snapped out of his head, immediately closing his eyes trying to adjust them to the light. God, couldn't they just change it? Who even picked it?

"Hey! Did you listen to what I just said?" schwoz asked with his strong accent, as he quickly took away the stuff he used to treat him, still looking at henry.

"Uh..sorry, I was thinking" he said apologetically, he didn't notice that he basically drifted out. Not hearing a word schwoz said.

"Yeah I noted that, is everything okay?"He asked, with concern in his tone.

Henry thought about it for a while, was everything okay? No, no nothing was okay. He just couldn't get over the fact that Ray wasn't there, and since schwoz was probably the closest to the hero besides him, he found himself to ask..

"He's...not here, is he" his voice was lower than he expected, he didn't even know if the scientist heard him, but his very own question made him realize that no, ray was indeed not here. And it pained him, a lot. But even if he could've guessed it, it didn't hurt less when schwoz revealed him the reason.

"Ray? He's on patrol henry..I thought he told you" He frowned, but still, his eyes were telling the boy that it hurt to be the one to tell him that. Henry could feel his heart 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘬, the only bit of hope that he was wrong, that it was all a lie crushed on his shoulders, weighting him down.

He's on patrol, 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶.

That's what henry heard. And he could feel his eyes start watering.

Of course Ray went on patrol without him, he had a wound so of course he didn't call him. That's what the boy was telling himself, that it was normal, it was okay.

 

Except not a single inch of his body believed that.

 

He could've at least call him, why? Why didn't he?

Did he just go? Like that? Or at least he thought about calling his sidekick? Did he not care anymore? Or he just decided that he didn't need henry at all?

"Don't worry about it, he should be back in a bit" schwoz's voice brought him back to the present, as he took a couple of steps, so that he was standing in front of henry "anyway, your wound is fine. You should be completely well in a week or so, but to be sure come back here in a few days, if you want"

Henry didn't answer, he knew that if he spoke tears would fall endlessly, and he wouldn't be able to stop them.

"Hey, I'm sure you and ray will figure it out soon. You can stay here and wait till he comes back, don't worry." he said, starting to make his way to the room near the mad bay, probably to wash the utensils he used.


Henry eventually got up from the bed. His head was slightly spinning as he stands, he must've lost track of time, for how long did he sit on the cot? It honestly felt like forever, still, there were no signs of the hero. At this point, Henry wasn't sure if he was able to remain in the man cave any longer, he was starting to feel like the walls of the structure were becoming smaller by the second, and if a whole extra minute passed they would've crush him.

He wanted to stay, he wanted to wait for ray..he really did. But even if he wished to see him the whole day, he couldn't wait anymore. He didn't want to see him, now or ever again. Henry just wanted to disappear, he had enough of this fucking thingy. He didn't wanna feel the guilt choke his heart anymore, he didn't want to think about what he said a moment longer. He was done waiting for Ray to show up and save him

𝘚𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘸 𝘩𝘪𝘮

He probably would've regret thinking that, he could already feel the weight of those words sink into his chest. But he was tired of feeling like he couldn't even breathe properly.

So he just got out.

He didn't even look at Charlotte or Jasper, as somehow he found the energy to move his legs, as the back of his throat started to ache, meaning that tears were already founding their way to his eyes. He stepped in the elevator, not daring to look back at his friends, even if he could hear them trying to call his name. After a couple seconds, he was out of the store. He didn't know if it was the right thing, but he just felt like if he stayed in that room for another second he would've gone mad. He needed to get out, so he didn't bother to look at anyone, knowing there were no chances that someone could've convinced him to stay.

The sun wasn't up in the sky anymore, as henry let the darkness of the night embrace him. It was cold, and he couldn't help but feel the distance between he and ray grow more each second than passed. He felt his eyes stinging, as he looked back at the sign where junk and stuff written on it, was the only thing glowing on the streets, besides the few streetlights that weren't even that bright.

He walked away, far from the only place that could give him the hope that the hero would've come back, that henry could still sort it out with him.

His side was doing better now, but the stinging of his arm was just the remainder that nothing felt better than before. So here he was, in the middle of the street, walking alone while his sobs echoed through the quietly of the neighborhood. At this point the moon was the only source of light, as henry climbed up the tree (even if he shouldn't) and made his was in his room.


Henry was sitting on the grass, back leaning against the willow tree in the middle of swellview park. The breeze was getting warmer by the days, since spring was around the corner. It was hot enough that a few people were in a T-shirt, but henry? Henry couldn't.

The familiar red lines were covering his body, accompanied with the bruised that Jake left every time he returned home. Since he said that thing to Jake, it's like his father became more angry than ever, he yelled at him like he was disgusted by his presence. And with the hatred of his own father that grew more every day, plus the fact that he still didn't sort things out with Ray, his arms were the worst he ever saw them. Cuts marked his shoulders and the whole way down to his wrists, scars were forming on his thigh, and the now healing wound on his side, wasn't the only thing on his stomach that he had to take care of. But he didn't care, in fact..it was comforting, to have them. It made him feel valid, like they were the only thing that was certain in his life, no matter what happened, they were always there, like in a way he could've count on them to be with him. Sometimes he thought about what ray would've said, if he saw what a mess he became when henry himself didn't think he could get any worse, guess he was wrong.

Thinking of ray made his heart ache, he didn't want things to end this way.

It's been a week since he saw him.

When Charlotte made him go to the cave, he didn't show up at work the next day, or the other..or the ones after. Since he walked away without saying anything, he didn't go back.

Not seeing ray in the man cave, like he wished him to be for the whole day, was like a brick in the face. It hurt him so much that henry didn't have the gut to show up again, even if schwoz asked him to, cause of him being afraid that he wouldn't find ray again. So here he was, after school, sitting there alone cause he didn't want to face his boss, and going home wasn't an option either.

Why? Because nothing changed since a week passed..expect for one thing.

Jake.

He was always in a bad mood, and henry learnt to live with it. He was always going to get mad at the boy, and he grew to be fine with it as long as he didn't touch piper. But something was off this time, even if he didn't show it, henry always kept an eye on jake, studying his action, what he said and how, because in a way it helped him knowing how mad he was and why. But this time he could tell that instead of being mad like he was all the time, he was nervous like there was something that bothered him. And henry could only wonder what was really going on, since he didn't dare to even think about asking.

Even if the idea of going back home made him sick, it's not like he could stay on the street all day. So he slowly got up from his spot, and started to walk away from the park. The sun was high in the sky, and he just wished that he could take his hoodie off as he stepped on the grass, hoping that things will change soon so that he could go back to the man cave after school. Instead of being forced to choose between staying in public park or go back to the house where he could only hope he wouldn't get beat up.

He had a bad feeling, his breath was stuck in the back of his throat as he tightened the grip on the phone. Henry was trying to call piper, as anxiety was growing every step he was taking that made him closer to the house. His sister wasn't answering and that was a bad, 𝘣𝘢𝘥 thing, there was one rule between the two of them that they made because of Jake. Always, answer, the phone, if the other is calling you. And that was how it worked, neither of them ever steeped on that promise for the sake of the other.

Henry was now running, his devise now back in the poket of his jeans, cause he could hear screaming at the end of the road, where their house was.

He got in front of the red door, and didn't even think before slamming it open. The view in front of his hazel eyes took every breath out of his lungs.

He was ready to scan the room searching for his sister, but his gaze was now fixed on the two people that instantly stopped arguing as soon as they saw him. His whole body froze, he swore he didn't feel himself breathing, but he found the strength to move his lips just enough to let the shaky voice fill the silence in the room.

 

"Mom...?"

Notes:

This chapter took FOREVER. And it's not even good like a wanted it to be😤. I swear the next one will be better, take care guys💗💗