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Chapter Text

-Prologue-

 

Shi Qingxuan screamed.

 

“Don’t make me do it! I can’t! I can’t! Ge—please”

 

“Don’t be scared Qingxuan! Look at me—listen—this won’t hurt more than switching fates—go to General Pei, he’ll take care of you.”

 

Shi Wudu held out the blade.

 

Shi Qingxuan sobbed, writhing against his shackles.

 

He Xuan, who had been infinitely patient until that point snapped—lashing out with a kick. Shi Wudu hit the floor with a crack; coughing up blood.

 

Shi Qingxuan, fighting against his bindings, cried, “Ge!”

 

“Enough”

 

He Xuan’s tone was chilling.

 

“Your brotherly act won’t save you.”

 

Suddenly, Shi Wudu who had lain sputtering lungful’s of blood, leapt up and lunged towards his brother—seizing Shi Qingxan’s throat.

 

Shi Qingxuan struggled to draw in breath, he choked out, “…Ge?”

 

There was an almost hysterical gleam in Shi Wudu’s eyes, “Qingxuan! I can’t leave you by yourself like this! No—no we’ll both go—come with gege you wouldn’t survive anyway on your own!”

 

Shi Qingxuan’s lungs labored with gasps, death crawled in his ribs, icy cold fear poured down his spine.

 

Xie Lian was shocked.

 

Would Shi Wudu really kill his own brother?

 

Shi Wudu strangled him tighter—Shi Quinxuan’s sight spotted with black.

 

Then Shi Wudu’s forearms were ripped away.

 

For once, Shi Qingxuan did not call out for his brother.

 

The last thing Xie Lian saw was He Xuan’s dark gaze—before he was spit back into his own body.

 

Shi Qingxuan was now alone.

 

“I didn’t give you a third choice”

 

He Xuan’s voice was cold.

 

The air was thick with the stench of blood as Shi Wudu staggered back.

 

He landed on his knees, head bowed.

 

Shi Qingxuan’s eyes were blurry with tears.

 

“Ming X—He Xuan—please—I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry—we were the ones who sinned! We’re the ones in the wrong! It’s all my fault—you—your family—didn’t deserve this fate! It’s all because of me my brother tried to find a scapegoat—believed we could get away with it and never considered who would suffer on the other end please—He Xuan—I’m sorry.”

 

Shi Qingxuan would’ve kowtowed a hundred—no– a million times if he could, begging for mercy, forgiveness. But still chained as he was, all he could do was plead.

 

Slowly, He Xuan turned his gaze to Shi Qingxuan.

 

Shi Qingxuan’s breath caught.

 

Then Shi Wudu spoke.

 

His mouth was still stained with blood. The bloody stumps where his arms used to be were limp at his sides.

 

“My brother is right.”

 

Shi Qingxuan flinched—he had half the mind to tell his brother that this is enough, to tell him to stop—to ask, no–to beg him not to speak anymore.

 

But—“I have sinned.” Shi Wudu bowed lower, trembling as he felt He Xuan’s cold gaze landing on him

 

A sight to see, the once prideful Watermaster—begging for forgiveness.

 

He Xuan froze, slowly taking in the view.

 

“Ge” Shi Qingxuan hissed, fear so deep exhaustion had begun to seep in.

 

Then, He Xuan scoffed.

 

Shi Qingxuan’s went still, trepidation crawled up his spine

 

“You beg, like this, after you try to condemn your brother to death? You claim to love him, protect him, yet the first apology comes from his lips. I gave him so many chances but every-time he chooses you. Look at him now, still pleading for mercy on your life even after you try to kill him. Even after knowing the whole truth—he still chooses you.”

 

He Xuan kicked Shi Wudu square in the front, and Shi Wudu slammed onto his back.

 

He Xuan’s chest rose and fell rapidly, then he stepped closer and closed his hand around Shi Wudu’s neck.

 

Shi Qingxuan whimpered, not knowing how to respond, making his fair gorgeous beautiful baby girl delicate pleasing pulchritudinous angelic exquisite well formed (you get the point) face paler.

 

“Do you still choose him?”

 

He Xuan’s voice was low, almost pleading. 

 

“Even after all this, will you keep trying to save him? Why? After all that he has done?”

 

Shi Qingxuan lowered his head.

 

His tongue tangled in his throat, the sound of his heart thudded dully in his ears.

 

“He Xuan he’s my brother, I can’t—I can’t hate him.”

 

He Xuan’s back was turned, but Shi Qingxuan could still make out the strangling hold he had on Shi Wudu.

 

Shi Qingxuan closed his eyes. “He Xuan please”

 

He Xuan clenched his jaw, then shoved Shi Wudu to the ground and planted his foot onto the back of Shi Wudu’s head.

 

He pressed harder as Shi Wudu struggled beneath him.

 

Then he slowly met Shi Qingxuan’s gaze.

 

“Him?” He Xuan dug his boot further into Shi Wudu’s skull.

 

“Or me?”

Chapter Text

The sun slowly creeped up from the horizon of the plaza, signifying another busy day ahead. Mice ducked back to their shadows, birds started to chirp their early morning songs and the leaves gently rustled in the warm sea breeze. Cold misty air gathered onto leaves and petals, dew glistening like diamonds in the sunlight. The sky, painted in soft pink and orange hues, tinged with delicate blue and purple, cast its pretty colors down to the houses and streets below. The scenery was untouched by wanderers, save for a hardworking farmer setting up his stall.

Shi Qingxuan had finally finished arranging his produce. He sat down to take in a deep breath of the crisp, early morning air. It was late autumn, and the golden osmanthus were in full bloom, filling the street with its bright fragrance. The ginkgos had also turned into a gorgeous shade of yellow, signifying the end of autumn, and withered down the empty streets.

 

Shi Qingxuan sighed, tilting his head up to the sky as vibrant leaves fluttered to the ground.

 

It was… peaceful here. Quiet. Hard to believe just days ago...No. He wouldn’t go there.

 

Shi Qingxuan closed his eyes, hoping for a few moments of rest before the morning began, only to slip into a light sleep.

 

He dreamed of a familiar voice, and dark eyes—flashes of blood—anger—

 

“Old Feng!!! How’ve ya been!!” A cheerful voice greeted him.

 

Shi Qingxuan flinched awake, startled, but settled his composure to respond with a pleasant smile.

 

“I’ve been alright, how have you been holding on Mr. Yang?”

 

“Well, thanks to your generous help the other day, we managed to fix the cart and bring the shop back up again. Do tell me whenever you guys need some extra rice, we have plenty to spare.”

 

“Old man Yang… All those times I thought you were a stick in the mud, turns out you can be real nice sometimes.” Shi Qingxuan teased.

 

“Oi brat, I was being nice, don’t ruin the moment.” Mr. Yang joked back.

 

Shi Qingxuan laughed before practically shoving a bag into the old man's grasp.

 

“Thank you so much old man, tell your wife and kids I said hi. Here's some fresh radishes, take them home will ya?”

 

“You… Then take some of these chestnuts, they’re just in season. Send your family my regards as well. Be careful, the path is going to get less and less forgiving when winter hits.”

 

With that, the old man fondly waved Qingxuan goodbye before trudging off into the distance, radish bag in tow.
____________________________________________________________________________

 

‘UGHHH it's so freaking HOT- how do people do this everyday…’

 

Shi Qingxuan internally screamed into the void.

 

Normally, he’d lean on “Ming Xiong’s” shoulders and-

 

He stilled.

 

That normalcy will never come back. His days dilly-dallying with “Ming Xiong” as the beautiful Wind Master are officially over.

 

He looked at himself through the reflection of a nearby puddle.

 

His once delicate and smooth hands were now rough and calloused from farming, his fair and glassy skin had been smothered and tanned by the sun. His hair- which had been silky and soft thanks to the various hair oils that he and Ming Xiong—no He Xuan had tested together, lost their shine, turning his locks greasy and dull. His once full frame was now hollowed out quite a bit and… and his face! HIS FACE was now covered in DIRT and GRIME.

 

All he could do was laugh along at his pityable state. How foolish he was…

 

“Hello, some of these radishes please!” A young girl approached. Her hair was long and straight, a deep black color, and her eyes were a soft shade of violet; twinkling in the sunlight. She looked barely fourteen, and exuded a youthful energy.

 

“Of course! Let me pack those up for you, here's the change.” Qingxuan jumped up and hurriedly packed everything into her bag, throwing in some extras alongside the plump snow-white radishes.

 

Feeling the girl's intense stare burning a hole through his back, Shi Qingxuan quickly turned around.

 

“Gege, are you new? I've never seen you around these parts before. These radishes look tasty, your hair is so pretty, what's your routine? Tell me your name.”

Being blasted with questions after questions, Shi Qingxuan didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry, he finally decided to just answer the girl’s random inquiries.

 

“My name is Old Feng, I'm not from this place, I'm just coming here to sell some vegetables. As for my hair, I use rice water to wash it.”

 

“Old Feng? That's such a weird name, I never met anyone who actually has “Old” in their name before.”

 

Now Shi Qingxuan really didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

 

“Well thank you for the radishes, my older sister will love this.” With that, the little girl ran off, vanishing fast from his view.

 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

The sun slowly began to set, the fiery sky bruising in deep purples and blues, adorned by swirling white clouds. Leaves slowly fluttered to the ground, making the path home look like it was raining flames. Gentle breezes brushed against Shi Qingxuan’s hair, reminding him of what was once his life. All he could hear was the rustling of leaves and the crunching of grass as he pushed his cart back through the mountain pass. After a while, he paused at a cliff. Over-looking the edge was the vast ocean below. Waves crashed against the shore, and black stones jutted from its surface. He took a deep breath, the salty air stinging his skin, before he continued his way home.

 

For Shi Qingxuan, after everything that had occurred, even glancing at the shore made him sick. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he looked right at those deep waters, the irony being he’d lived beside the same seas for all his childhood. And now, all he could think about was the swirling storm in the ocean below—so similar to those once-familiar eyes. How he’d braved those seas with his best-friend. And the blood that now dilutes their history. Ming Xiong—to Shi Qingxuan he’d always been Ming-Xiong—and he couldn’t help but think, was it really all a ruse? He Xuan’s grand revenge—yet he’d been by Shi Qingxuan’s side for so long. Though it all made sense now, Ming Yi had always seemed to harbor unreasonable animosity towards Shi Wudu, made all sorts of slights towards the Watermaster—when really Shi Qingxuan couldn’t think of a single time the two had even spoken more than a word to each other. But—that couldn’t be it, could it? All threads just snapped. Ming Yi—He Xuan had cared hadn’t he? What was it he told him—”I gave you every chance.” And for a selfish, dark moment—Shi Qingxuan wondered why things couldn’t go back the way they were. Ming Yi or no—irrefutably in the end—Shi Qingxuan’s best friend had been He Xuan. And Shi Qingxuan, he found himself thinking back to the manor; how things had ended, how He Xuan had—

 

Shi Qingxuan slammed full force into a solid figure.

 

The impact sent him reeling to the ground, unceremoniously knocking his head into his wooden cart.

 

Shi Qingxuan held a hand to his temple and winced as he looked up at the stranger he’d rammed into.

 

“Ah! I'm so sorry… Sir?”

 

The stranger in front of him paused. After a moment, he finally spoke.

 

“It's fine. Are you… alright?”

 

At the sound of that rich voice, Shi Qingxuan glanced up, getting a clear view of the man. He was young, probably in his early twenties. His eyes were the deep blue of the sea at dawn, emanating a youthful glow. His hair was long and silky, fashioned in a neat braid that was tied off with a cerulean ribbon.

 

Shi Qingxuan finally stood, brushing leaves off of his back and ducking his head in embarrassment. “I’m okay. I’m sorry about that.”

 

"Be careful next time.” The young man mumbled

 

“I’ll try, knowing my recent luck though… Aha, nevermind. Thank you.” Now Shi Qingxuan felt really awkward.

 

The man offered a stiff nod. “It's getting dark, stay vigilant.”

 

Shi Qingxuan threw another wooden smile towards the young man, before hurriedly grabbing the cart and making his way back down the mountains.

 

Yet it seemed Shi Qingxuan’s poor fortune prevailed. The last of the sun had slipped behind the twin peaks, and the path ahead of him was pooling with darkness. Shi Qingxuan lit up his lantern, a shudder passing through him as he watched the crowding shadows shift in the light. Now, it wasn’t only the water he feared, but the rippling darkness cast under the stars as well. Normally, Shi Qingxuan would have no need for such a reaction, on his trips down the mountain he’d be accompanied by the travelling group of vagabonds. They’d puff their chest and swear to defend him against any demons in the dark and Shi Qingxuan would feel so lightened by their remarks he’d lose any hint of dread.

 

Many of these vagabonds, forever thankful of the Rain Master’s kindness for the shelter she offered, decided to work in her village. Some settled there, content with that steady life, while others continued to travel from the royal capital to trade produce, or wander to aid more vagabonds. Yet, even as these vagabonds parted with their varied lives, the group remained tightly knit and ensured to keep in contact with one another.

 

And it was in this group of vagabonds that Shi Qingxuan and Shi Wudu had resided with for so long.

Chapter Text

Shi Qingxuan and Shi Wudu stumbled onto the rocky ground of the royal capital. Still trembling, Shi Wudu fumbled to bring Shi Qingxuan close to him. Where his hands once were, Shi Wudu now only had bloody stumps and they bled rich red onto Shi Qingxuan’s muddy clothes.

 

Shi Qingxuan fingers scraped against the front of Shi Wudu’s robes. Then, after a moment, Shi Qingxuan finally spoke up.

 

“Ge…” His voice quavered, but for the first time in a while, it was not out of fear—but hot anger.

 

“I know. I know everything I did—it was wrong. However…”

 

“However what? You took his fate into your own hands, traded it like cattle, exchanged it like you had the right to. It was his. Not mine.” Shi Qingxuan argued indignantly. His voice was sharp, almost rising with his vexation.

 

“You make excuses after excuses but here’s the truth—you ruined his life. Every moment since you meddled he’d lost any chance of a happy ending. His parents? Dead. Sister? Dead. Fiancee? Dead. They’re all gone because of you. While I lived blissfully unaware and practically bathing in good fortune he’d taken on my name without even knowing and suffered a fate that wasn’t even his. He was supposed to ascend Ge—ascend and probably become a god better than anything I was. I’d say every action he took in revenge—he had every right to do it.”

 

Shi Qingxuan shoved out of Shi Wudu’s hold and angrily rubbed at his eyes.

 

Shi Wudu narrowed his brows. “You know what I don’t understand Qingxuan? Why you can’t comprehend that I did this for you. I saved your life, I gave you a chance to ascend. I risked every chance just so you could live happily. And you did, didn't you? And we’re still alive now aren’t we? So don’t get mad at me, all of it was for you anyway.”

 

Shi Wudu averted his gaze, his mouth pressed into a thin line. “You were scared sick Qingxuan. And you would’ve spent the rest of your life like that if nothing had been done. You would have

 

amounted to nothing, every effort our parents put in to keep you safe and hidden would have been wasted away. I gave you a life to live, I gave you happiness.”

 

Frustrated tears welled up, making Shi Qingxuan’s vision blurry. “That’s not the point and you know it. I didn’t ask for my fate to be switched, not even once. I could’ve been content with living the life I had. I would’ve been FINE, worshiping you and him. Staying in the middle court could have been the best thing for me.”

 

“...”

 

“I didn’t ask for this. I never did.”

 

“Look, I’m sorry-”

 

“BUT YOU’RE NOT.”

 

“I thought it was what you would’ve wanted.”

 

“Well it wasn't."

 

“I know that now.”

 

“It was selfish.”

 

“It was.”

 

“He was my best friend.”

 

“I know.”

 

“You’re still bleeding”

 

“I know that too.”

 

“…”

 

He Xuan… hadn’t been able to switch Shi Qingxuan’s fate. Even after the way everything had gone down—Shi Qingxuan was the same, fate not swapped back —and Shi Wudu, he was… relatively alive.

 

But both were significantly weakened, Shi Qingxuan, from getting his divinity drained by the Reverend of Empty Words, and Shi Wudu worn out from failing his tribulations and debilitated by He Xuan. And they felt the crushing curse of mortality before they knew it. Pangs of hunger nearly crippled them, their bodies exerted—but they managed to stumble further before passing by a merchant whose cart had broken. Shi Wudu, who had previous knowledge of all things mechanical, hesitantly walked Shi Qingxuan through repairing the wheels. The merchant, terribly grateful, gave Shi Wudu some spare fabric and herbs to wrap up his arms and stop the bleeding, and rationed a few buns for them to eat.

 

Finally with some food, and Shi Wudu cleaned up to look less like a walking massacre, Shi Qingxuan and Shi Wudu ventured through the capital, where they found themselves bumping into a group of vagabonds. Shi Qingxuan was quick to befriend them, the vagabonds taking to Shi Qingxuan’s charming personality, despite Shi Wudu's wholly unfriendly demeanor.

 

To ensure that no word of their existence spread, Shi Qingxuan took the name of Old Feng, and managed to compel an entirely reluctant Shi Wudu (read threaten) to take on the name Old Shui. And—maybe because they were pitying him, thinking Shi Wudu had a few screws loose as he raged on and on on how he was a god—the vagabonds allowed Shi Qingxuan and Shi Wudu to travel with them

 

Now, in the company of the lighthearted vagabonds, Shi Qingxuan and Shi Wudu had made it another day of traveling. And after securing a spot to rest, the group finally took a much needed break. They camped near a river bank, setting up some mats to lie down more comfortably, and under the darkening sky, their discussion continued.

 

“I’m telling ya, that's some bull. If you’re a god you wouldn’t be here rolling in the muck with us.”

 

“Is not! I might not have power now but I used to be a god still! Show some respect!” Shi Wudu remained indignantly defending his case.

 

One of the vagabond sighs, “Old Shui is blabbering again…”

 

“Was not!”

 

Another questioned, “Who allowed Old Shui to touch alcohol?”

 

“How did we even get alcohol?”

 

“Some wine merchants gave it as a thank you gift for the “god” over there because he helped fix something.”

 

“That stick in the mud is actually helping people?”

 

“I know right.”

 

“To think yesterday he was all uppity, looking down on us.”

 

Shi Qingxuan laughed, it was rather nice seeing his brother being leveled down on. Especially when the ones doing it were the very same people Shi Wudu wouldn’t have been caught dead with as a god.

 

Though the night had barely begun, Shi Qingxuan couldn't help but feel tired. In the chilled air, he drifted asleep under the twinkling stars.

Chapter Text

“Do you want to work for my village?”

 

Known for her reclusiveness, Shi Qingxuan could count on his fingers the amount of times she even showed up in the Heavenly Capital back when he was a god. However, she’s known to be such a kind person, more than willing to help those who she cherished. Maybe that was why she showed up in front of his crew, offering him and his brother a chance to restart.

 

Her simple, humble, down to earth nature, made her easily blendible into the background among the seas of egoistical gods and goddesses who flaunt their wealth, fame and power in the Heavenly Capital. Yet here, she was downright ethereal. Hair tied back by a simple white thread, dark strands cascaded down her back, her skin—sunkissed from hours of labor in the fields—glowed warmly. She wore a simple set of verdant robes, yet they accentuated her lithe figure. Accompanied by her loyal companion, the black ox, she graced the royal capital.

 

Her voice was airy and soft, and she spoke in a slow manner, full of warmth. Shi Qingxuan’s anxious mind shut down almost instantly, washing away his distress.
…

 

Shi Qingxuan blinked. The fire in his lamps wavered, and he could feel weary exhaustion creeping in his bones as he closed the distance to the abode down the trail. The fireflies flickered in the darkness of the night and the cool wind brushed against his thin cotton shirt.

 

The rocky, mountainous path was eventually replaced with a smooth, worn, road. Shi Qingxuan tiredly slowed his pace as the rattling of his cart died down. The scenery couldn’t better match its owner, ethereal and tranquil. Even after all this time, Shi Qingxuan still couldn’t help but stop to marvel at the small cozy village tucked below the high mountain peaks.

 

Past the entrance, Shi Qingxuan could see the clutter of houses lit warmly by amber lanterns. The series of old houses sturdily stood against the hardship of time—living proof of the resilient people who stayed in them. Worn down but well loved. The cold mist of the nearby waterfall sliced Shi Qingxuan right along the face, jolting him out of his reverie. Further down the road, a pavilion, located right beside the waterfall, gave off the lovely aroma of heated spices and savory food.

 

Noticing his arrival, a figure perked up in the distance.

 

“Qingxuan, over here!” A voice called out from the dark. The man had the appearance of one in his late twenties, dressed in shabby clothes, his eyes were deep blue and his long, silky hair shimmered. As Shi Qingxuan approached, he could make out what were mechanical devices simulating those of arms attached below the man’s elbows.

 

“Ge! What's the occasion?” Shi Qingxuan replied in confusion as he pushed his cart through the sturdy bridge that connected to the pavilion.

 

“I’ve finally managed to configure these devices so that I can control these digits, and I’d thought what better than to test them through whipping up a few dishes?”

 

“Must have been difficult…”

 

“I’d say it's still better than no arms at all. I got those two over there to help of course. Either way, we decided to celebrate a little with the dishes I made and some fresh fruits from Rain Master’s orchard. She even helped to pick the ripest ones.”

 

“Hurry up, the meals are cooling down!” A voice interrupted. It was a tall and (un)composed young man, maybe in his late teens to early twenties, with golden eyes that shone starkly against his raven hair. Though Shi Qingxuan’s opinion of him had soured due to his whole drama with dianxia, it was clear he’d felt entirely apologetic for the ruckus caused, and after residing with the Rain Master, it seemed he’d even tempered down. All of which made Shi Qingxuan consider him in a better light once more.

 

And standing beside the yellow-eyed man, was a slight, younger girl with dimmed violet eyes. Though she seemed of shy nature, Shi Qingxuan had to make a mental note to remind himself of her past deeds. Silent, but could kill me before I even blinked, definitely don’t want to get on her bad side for sure.

 

A wave of exhaustion finally hit Shi Qingxuan as he slumped down into one of the wooden chairs set up around a table. Then, nostalgia slammed him like a brick.

 

It has been hundreds of years since his ge had personally cooked.

Why would he when he had all the wealth in the world? Being the water tyrant and all, it had been even longer since Shi Qingxuan had an actual “family” dinner with Shi Wudu.

 

Recently, his brother had become infinitely more soft spoken, helping with menial chores and cooking. Seeing all the people around him, Shi Qingxuan began to feel emotional. While there were many gods and goddesses whom he called friends in the heavenly realm, there were only few who truly thought of him as the same. Like Xie Lian and …

 

“Qingxuan? Are you alright? You’ve barely touched your soup.” Shi Wudu’s voice cut through Shi Qingxuan's train of thought, and he found his brother’s face tinged with worry.

 

“Maybe he’s just tired from the trip back. By the way, when is the Rain Master coming?” Pei Xiu asked.

 

“She’s coming back soon, I think she was wrapping up some last minute harvesting.” Banyue answered, however her attention had also caught on Shi Qingxuan, “Maybe you should go rest, you look tired.”

 

“I'm fine, don't worry. I was just thinking a bit, that's all.” Shi Qingxuan replied, trying to keep his tone level.

 

“...” Shi Wudu fell silent before stating matter of factly, “You were thinking of him, weren’t you.”

 

“...” Now it was Shi Qingxuan’s turn to fall silent.

 

Shi Wudy exhaled, then simply told Shi Qingxuan, "Get some rest. It’s been a long day for us all.”

 

Shi Qingxuan stood up, sweeping off his ragged robes as if it would brush away his memories along with it.

 

“Then greet the Rain Master for me, I’m going to bathe.”

 

Shi Qingxuan silently made his way into the small cabin, mouth unconsciously set into a mild frown, small candles flickered with warm light as Shi Qingxuan gathered a rag and a bundle of cotton clothes before going on towards the bathhouse behind the abode.

 

The bathhouse was stale with the air of cold, the water as well a freezing kiss against his skin. Shi Qingxuan closed his eyes, fighting against the shivers that wracked up his spine. He flinched as the icy water singed his open cuts and fresh bruises, opening his eyes briefly to see layers of grime and dirt swirl in the water. He winced as his skin went numb, but as flares of inner heat spread beneath his bones Shi Qingxuan found himself settled into the bath. Normally, Shi Qingxuan would heat the water, but today, he just needed a moment to feel the spikey pain of living. Shi Qingxuan watched strands of his hair damply stick to his skin. Slowly, he raised a hand to swipe away the wet beneath his eyes, and sunk lower into the cold water. Shi Qingxuan wished it would wash his feelings away as well. He remembers, back when he was the Wind Master, he’d take the warmest baths, peppered with flower petals, he’d soak for long relaxing hours, his vast amounts of merits allotted him the greatest of luxuries. Shi Qingxuan tipped his head back. Another memory of a life long gone. And, well, the frigid water reminded him of his lovely Ming-xiong. The Ming-xiong Shi Qingxuan had believed he’d known in and out, only to find he’s never known the real one. The Ming-xiong who’d stooped in his life, made himself a permanent perch irremovable from his place in Shi Qingxuan’s heart, who’d gone along with his every whims, who’d sat with him beneath the swaying flowers of a cherry blossom tree, and bickered with him at every waking moment. All of it a facade, an illusion, a lie. His Ming-xiong would never be and never was the real earth master. The real Ming Yi, who Shi Qingxuan had never known and yet had thought he had for the entirety of his god-hood never was. Would he have been the same? Would he have allowed Shi Qingxuan to call him his best friend and turn himself into a woman and go along with his wishes? Ming-xiong had been a charade of the real Ming-Yi… would they have been the same—or was there something real in the lies of He Xuan. Maybe the real Ming Yi could have never made Shi Qinguxan love him as his Ming-xiong had. Shi Qingxuan missed it. All of it. Even if it had been his worst fear set in the skin of his supposed best friend all his life, he wished the facade had never ended. Where did he go wrong? What should he have done? Should he have refused to go to Shi Wudu? Should he have stayed with Ming-xiong? Maybe then they’d still be together. Maybe then things would have stayed the same.

 

“Qingxuan?” A voice called outside.

 

Shi Qingxuan sank further into the water. It was his ge.

 

“...”

 

Shi Wudu hesitated, and Shi Qingxuan was sure, if he could see his ge’s expression right now it would be a complex mangle of contradicting emotions.

 

“I’m sure you can hear me well and clear Qingxuan,” Shi Wudu finally said, “just…just don’t wallow in something you can’t control. Of all of it, I’d think you’re the one with the least blame. It–wasn’t your fault.”

 

Qingxuan didn’t reply.

 

Shi Wudu sighed, “What I mean is... wounds need time to heal, especially ones that have struck deep. It's getting late, wrap up and get some rest.”

 

Shi Qingxuan took a deep breath, water sloshing as he rose.

 

“... Good night ge.”

 

“Good night Qingxuan.”

 

Shi Qingxuan rinsed himself off and watched the soapy water swirl down the drain. He’d decided to walk the long way back tonight, just for a moment to collect his thoughts. Thanks to some kind merchants Shi Wudu helped, and the Rain Master’s generosity, they managed to get a sizable hut with two rooms. While nothing as extravagant as his old life, it was still better than camping out in the wild like before.

 

Lying down on his straw mat, Shi Qingxuan inhaled the late, crisp autumn air, before slowly drifting asleep.

Chapter Text

The sun burned brightly in the sky. Shi Qingxuan and Ming Yi had just come back from the palace of Ling Wen for a mission brief, ready to descend once more.

 

“Ming Xionggg I’m tireddddd.” Shi Qingxuan whined to his lover, slumping his head onto Ming Yi’s shoulders with a groan.

 

“What now?” His Ming Yi looked back, his voice sounded irritated, but warm adoration was laced in his tone.

 

“How about we go to the Royal Capitol after this?” Shi Qingxuan chirped, turning to fully wrap his arms around his darling Ming-Xiong.

 

Ming Yi sighed long sufferingly, but replied, “Fine. You’re paying for snacks, though. And don’t cling to me like that!”

 

Even as he complained, Shi Qingxuan didn’t feel his love genuinely rejecting his advances, so he just giggled before squeezing closer to Ming Yi’s solid form.

 

“Of course! Anything for my dear Ming-Xiong.” Shi Qingxuan said in a singsong voice.

 

Suddenly, an idea popped into Shi Qingxuan’s mind.

 

“Ming Xiong! Ming-Xiong!” Shi Qingxuan squealed eagerly, jabbing at his Ming Yi.

 

“What. What. Ow! Don’t poke me like that.” Ming Yi attempted to catch Shi Qingxuan’s fluttering hands to no avail.

 

“How about we disguise ourselves as women! Since we’re going to Banyue Pass and all, there’s basically going to be no one to see you anyway if you’re worried. Besides, Banyue Pass is supposedly extremely dangerous, and we all know I’m waaayy stronger in my female form!”

Shi Qingxuan told him excitedly.

 

Ming Yi stared at him blankly for a few seconds.

 

“...What now?!”

 

Seeing how his Ming-Xiong had to actually pause for a moment, Shi Qingxuan declared triumphantly: “Twelve extra chicken skewers!”

 

Ming Yi just sighed once more; something almost akin to a fond expression flashed across his face. “Anything for you.”

 

“Yayy!”

 

The scenery suddenly changed, fizzing out into a darker, grimier scene. All Shi Qingxuan could see while falling was the raging tides. The water that was once calm now swirled angrily, pulling him down further and further beneath the waves. Shi Qingxuan wanted to scream out for help, yet he felt as if his mouth was stuffed with cotton. The air was suffocatingly tense. He landed harshly onto damp, muddy ground, restrained by cold metal chains, blood and tears smearing his face.

 

“H-He Xuan-gongzi- p-please…” He found himself sputtering.

 

Ah, he’s back to that fateful day. Shi Qingxuan could see his past self, reduced to groveling on his knees, hair disheveled, face marred. His ge was not far, pinned to the floor, sliced up and battered like a goat to a slaughter.

 

His past self then continued, “Ming Xio—He-gongzi, please let us go. My brother and I will atone for our crimes, just please.”

 

Shi Qingxuan tried to close his eyes, bracing for the inevitable. He knew what happened next, as indelible as the blood in his veins. Every single night since that day—

 

Crunnchhhh— The sounds of breaking bone, crackling one by one beneath the heel of the Black Water. Shi Qingxuan does not know if he’s ever heard such sickening sounds come from the Water Tyrant.

 

“This does not even make up for even tenfold of what you deserve, after what you did to cause my sister—” He Xuan’s voice breaks. “To take her own life—after you grieved her with my family’s destruction.” His eyes were sharp and cold. “She was only ten.”

 

The sharp sound of a slap recoiled in the air.

 

Shi Qingxuan’s past self screamed out for his ge, trails of murky tears mixing with the crimson on his cheeks.

 

“And for my fiancée, who was killed while she begged for mercy.”

 

He Xuan kicked Shi Wudu sharply, and the Water Tyrant cracked against a wall.

 

Blood stained his clothes, the room, the air, the stench of hot iron overwhelming.

 

Shi Wudu pooled in a puddle of deep vermilion.

 

“And my parents—who did all they ever could to raise my sister and me, who gave everything just so we could live a better life. My parents, whom you killed without a second thought.”

 

The Black Water stalked closer to Shi Wudu

 

Shi Qingxuan’s throat singed with the memory of his hoarse voice.

 

His past self’s hair fell in scraggled strands around his face. Shi Qingxuan remembers the way the sweat and tears stuck uncomfortably against his skin. Shi Qingxuan remembers never feeling more desperate. It had choked him, the fear, the ache, the want, and the need for this all to finally end.

 

If only he could just be the one getting killed instead.

 

And that was when a thought struck Shi Qingxuan, stilling his haphazard mind.

 

If he could convince the Black Water to a seemingly unfeasible bet, a lose-lose challenge for him and his brother. If he could scrounge up the last of his courage, the last of his strength, to attempt an escape.

 

Though in the back of Shi Qingxuan’s mind there were whispers of doubt; too many variables left to consideration, the actual escape, the improbability of He Xuan ever letting them go—but he had to try. Shi Qingxuan had no other option.

 

He looked up, eyes glossy with tears, and spoke tremblingly.

 

“He gongzi, please, I—I have a proposition.”

 

Every muscle in Shi Qingxuan’s body was tensed, and he rapidly blinked his wet eyes as He Xuan slowly met his gaze, one hand outstretched to Shi Wudu’s throat.

 

Coldly, the Black Water dragged his eyes down from Shi Qingxuan’s face to the shackles binding him to the wall.

 

“I would think you are in no position to make any deals,” He said.

 

Shi Wudu groaned lowly where he lay limp against the floor.

 

Shi Qingxuan swallowed through his dry throat.

 

“Please. Just listen to me, you—you can switch my fate if you don’t find it favorable.”

 

He Xuan merely raised a brow.

 

Shi Qingxuan's breath stuttered.

 

This was it, all or nothing. He couldn’t mess up now.

 

“Let my brother and I try to escape. Give us just ten minutes to do so. If—When we fail,” Shi Qingxuan shot another nervous glance at Shi Wudu’s limp form, “we’ll be at your hands anyway.” Shi Qingxuan finished in a breath barely above a whisper.

 

He Xuan sneered cruelly, “Oh, and why should I let you do that?”

 

“Please, He gongzi—just one chance and—and—” Shi Qingxuan inhaled with a shudder, “we won’t resist anymore.”

 

He Xuan's eyes were cold, but Shi Qingxuan could see him contemplating. He watched the ghost king’s gaze wander to Shi Wudu, who could make no movements to antagonize the Black Water, then trail back to Shi Qingxuan, smeared in filth and tears.

 

He Xuan did not smile when he stepped towards Shi Wudu and kicked his limp form.

 

Shi Wudu did not stir.

 

Shi Qingxuan gasped.

 

“Fine.” The ghost king said, “Run as far as you can.”

 

The bindings on Shi Qingxuan’s limbs disappeared, and he landed on his knees in a staggered motion.

 

Shi Qingxuan scrambled to get up, joints burning with the painful feeling of pins and needles.

 

“Ge,” He said with half a breath, gritting his teeth as he heaved his brother up. Shi Wudu let out a pained groan, and Shi Qingxuan worked as fast as he could to drag the weight of his brother onto his back.

 

And when Shi Qingxuan threw a glance behind him, He Xuan stood there, bathed in shadows, eyes clouded with an unreadable emotion.

 

He forced his gaze back in front of him and ran as hard as he could.

 

The fabric of Shi Qingxuan’s tattered robes caught and tangled around everything, and Shi Wudu could hardly help him in any way, a dead weight.

 

“Ge, ge please, I need your help.” Shi Qingxuan sobbed between haggard breaths, just trying to keep one foot in front of the other.

 

Shi Qingxuan could feel his strength slipping, adrenaline giving way to exhaustion. He knew that all of this was pointless. There was no way to get off this island, and no one out there to help them.

 

Once their ten minutes were up, He Xuan would come for them, and Shi Wudu was close to death anyway. There was no telling how much worse the ghost king could do to them.

 

“Please,” Shi Qingxuan begged into the air, “please, anyone, help—help us we’ll atone for our sins I swear—” Shi Qingxuan choked on his breath as he stumbled over a tree root prodding out of the soil.

 

Who was he kidding? There was no one out there who could save him. No one who would want to.

 

Shi Qingxuan crumpled, just managing to keep Shi Wudu from slamming into the earth behind him. He panted harshly, tears burning his eyes, and gazed into his hands.

 

If only, if only he had any last drops of divinity in him, some power he could dredge up for his brother’s sake, for the chance to make everything right.

The winds picked up, and Shi Qingxuan paid it no mind, even when the trees began to shake violently as he embraced himself, pressing his tearstained face into his arms, bracing himself for the inevitable, shuddering at the whipping gusts.

 

Wait—what? Shi Qingxuan’s head snapped up, pupils wide as torn leaves swirled around his frame, and an odd feeling crept up in his chest.

 

Shi Qingxuan reached for his brother as his hair flew wildly in the wind, “Ge, ge, what’s going on? Wake up!”

 

And despite all his outermost confusion, deep down Shi Qingxuan had a feeling this was no one else’s doing but his own.

 

Shi Qingxuan could not describe it, no matter how he tried. Still, it was almost akin to the power of his Windmaster fan, the strength it carried in a single flutter, nearly as if the very wind gathered him up, along with the form of Shi Wudu’s limp body in his arms, and carried them away.

 

Until they were dumped onto the rocky ground of the royal capital.