Archive of Our Own ^beta

My hands dragged restlessly along the back of the sofa as I braced my weight against it. The embroidery was a soft emerald velvet that rose and fell with the designs painstakingly etched onto the fabric.

I let my nails catch on the elevated parts of the artistry, if only to distract myself from the scene unfolding not more than 10 feet ahead of me.

Cal stands with his back to one of the many columns aligning the circumference of the room, one hand gripping a glass of what looked like hard liquor, the other resting idly at his side. He’s wearing a simple black suit, not even a tie. Instead, the top of his suit remains unbuttoned, loose and comfortable.

Unlike the rest of the delegation, he didn’t dress to impress.

I almost smirk at the thought. While nearly everyone else came to either gawk or get gawked at tonight, more concerned with appearances than their own well-being, Tiberias Calore couldn’t care less.

Unfortunately for me, his casual appearance did little to subdue his attractiveness, if anything, it only intensified it.

And it would be a lie to say that it went unnoticed.

Why else would I be straining my ears trying to hear the conversation he was having with the pretty representative who’s been running her mouth for the past 20 minutes?

As if sensing my gaze, she shifts to peer up at him through her lashes.

She’s petite, not much taller than me, so when she looks up without moving her head, the motion seems ridiculously exaggerated.

If not for the circumstance, I might laugh.

Instead, I grit my teeth, trying even harder to decipher the words they were exchanging.

Though to my dismay, the room was overflowing with useless chatter, and any attempt I made to sift through the rubbish was futile.

Of course, it wasn't that I cared what she said or even what he said, for that matter.

I knew how he felt, and how he had no problem making those feelings explicitly clear to me every night he spent in Monfort.

And I knew that no amount of polite smiles or nods at random women would change that.

Yet, there was still a scared, reckless part of me deep within. A part that just couldn’t ignore the way she looked at him.

The way she touched him.

I watch her gently trail a pale, manicured hand down the lapel of his suit before letting it linger on his abdomen for a few seconds. Smirking salaciously up at him when she finally let it drop, never tearing away her gaze.

I swallowed down the urge to vomit all over the pristine marble floor. Immediately, my face heated, shame quickly replacing nausea.

The simple interaction shouldn’t have been enough to provoke such a reaction out of me.

Yet it was.

There was no reason for me to be angry, or even jealous, I reminded myself, despite not being fully convinced.

Not truly, at least.

Desperate to trigger a shift in my train of thought, I inhaled sharply and turned my gaze to the far end of the room, meticulously arranged with furniture and decor that could make a high lord gawk.

The premier had chosen a lovely wing of his residence to host the international representatives coming to cast reports for their respective countries. The purpose of their visit was to detail “the current state of the Republic”.

So he had made it a point to choose an even lovelier room to place the representatives coming from the countries he considered to be the greatest threats.

And of course, no threat was greater than that of the Lakelands. And her royal highness, Iris Cygnet, has made it apparent that she enjoyed being a nuisance in more ways than one.

While most of the representatives were drab middle-aged men decorated with bland suits and even blander looks, the Cygnets opted to send a young brunette with questionable intentions.

Although the young woman came well-dressed and looking the part, she clearly struggled to stay on task…

…and to keep her hands to herself.

Stop it.

Gathering up my willpower, I forced myself not to look back at the horrendous scene, and instead lifted my gaze to the intricate crown molding and chandeliers that lined the dome ceiling.

It was undeniable that there had been no skimping on grandeur, every inch of the room was nothing less than magnificent. I’m sure both Davidson and his husband made sure of it themselves. These people were reporting back to royals after all. And Davidson has made his point clear;

You can have equality AND marble floors.

Who would’ve thought?

Now, if only the representative paid more attention to the polished marble floors like she was supposed to, instead of being hell-bent on ogling a particular abdicated king.

…

By the time his former majesty was done conversing with the masses, my feet had begun to ache mercilessly. After all, I probably hadn’t moved from my spot on the floor for the better part of the never-ending event.

To my embarrassment, I had been too busy glaring at Cal and his insufferable companion to notice that my feet were seconds away from fusing to the floor. And it definitely did not help that Gisa had chosen the most uncomfortable heels known to mankind for me to wear that evening.

They were dainty little things, black with thin straps that went slightly above the ankles. Seemingly harmless at first glance, but after a long night of pleasantries and repressed rage, they were nothing short of vicious.

Shifting my weight, I attempted to alleviate some of the pain that was rapidly beginning to build. And as I bent down to adjust some of the straps that were surely cutting off circulation by this point, I spotted a broad figure approaching me out of the corner of my eye. I didn’t need to look up to know who it was. His warmth was announcement enough.

“Hey,” he says softly with a small but genuine smile. Then his brow furrowed slightly, his face a mixture of amusement and perplexity. “Have you been standing here this whole time?”

Grumbling, I moved over to the sofa that I realized I probably should’ve taken advantage of a long time ago. I debated taking my shoes off for a few seconds before realizing that there were still a number of representatives insistent on overstaying their welcome, and the last thing I wanted was an etiquette lesson from Carmadon.

Dimly, I wondered if the representatives thought we were guests too, maybe that’s why they haven’t left yet. If that was the case, then we probably should’ve left a long time ago.

A shift in the cushions and the brushing of knees against mine draws me out of my thoughts, announcing Cal’s presence next to me.

Turning to look at him, I noticed just how exhausted he looked. Under his eyes, hollow circles that weren’t there a few hours ago, have begun to form.

At the sight of them, some of my agitation dissipates.

I really shouldn’t bring it up, it wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t like he did anything wrong. Besides, he looked like he was ready to drop, and if I was being completely honest, so was I.

But despite my best efforts to reason with myself, I couldn’t get the image of him and that woman out of my head. Her face angled up towards him, a lascivious smile dancing on her lips as his eyes briefly lingered on her décolleté. They had been inches apart for at least a few seconds before he even thought to step back or avert his gaze.

Didn’t do anything wrong, my ass.

And judging by the subtle scent of liquor on his breath and his far from exemplary behavior from earlier, he must have been drunker than I thought.

My expression must have unintentionally changed at the thought, because he frowned slightly.

“What?”

“Nothing,” I replied automatically, quickly dropping my gaze.

Then, thinking better of it, I snapped my head up to meet his eyes again. “Did you have fun?” I asked, trying to sound genuine, but it ended up sounding even more drained than I felt.

“Oh yeah, tons,” he replied with a crooked grin, his voice thick with sarcasm.

I couldn’t help the smirk that formed on my lips at his tone. It made it difficult to stay mad.

“It seemed like you were getting a particularly large amount of attention,” I dragged out each syllable as I said it, enunciating every word as if I could get all my thoughts across without outright saying them.

But he wasn’t having it.

“Oh yeah?” he repeated his words from earlier as he leaned in, though this time with an entirely different tone. “What kind of attention?”

I opened my mouth, expecting a quick retort to come tumbling out, but nothing did. I closed my mouth but didn’t look away, as his lips curved into a smirk.

I turned my body slightly to face him more fully. Instinctively, he placed a hand on my leg and leaned even further into my space, never breaking eye contact. If the room was still overflowing with delegates or had completely emptied, I had no idea. My focus was on only one person in the room.

“What kind of attention, Mare?” he repeated the question, this time softer than before.

“Oh, you know, the usual type, but I suppose foreign dignitaries tend to be interested in that sort of thing,” I replied with a shrug.

When he didn’t reply, I kept going, taking his silence in stride, “Such as perhaps, how a former King lives his day-to-day life, and if, in fact, that life is quite as terrible as they seem to think or… possibly even worse?”

At that, he laughed out loud, the sound turning quite a few heads of some of the remaining guests. I think I may have even spotted Davidson quirk an eyebrow at us from across the room. But I didn’t care, sitting back with a smirk, I gave Davidson a little nod before turning back to Cal, unable to conceal my satisfaction at the response I had elicited.

Despite my playful demeanor, I knew that it didn’t take a genius to guess the topic I was dancing around. And if Cal’s smugness from earlier was any indicator, he was definitely catching on. Though he may not be the most perceptive, he knew me well enough to recognize when there was something on my mind that I didn’t necessarily want to verbalize, and this was one of those times.

After his laughter died down, he turned his head back down to lock his eyes on mine. Daring him to bring up the topic, I pursed my lips and stared right back at him, my eyes narrowing ever so slightly.

He swallowed for a moment, betraying his own nonchalance. But before I could delight in the thought of scaring him off the topic, he spoke.

“Actually, there was one particular representative…”

It seemed that he was feeling rather brave tonight.

“Oh?”

He smirked, knowing damn well that I knew exactly what he was talking about. But I had far too much pride to confirm his suspicions.

“Yeah, she seemed quite interested in my quality of life these days.”

And the sight flashes before my eyes yet again. I don’t need a mirror to tell me that I’m blushing. As if my anger and shame also needed a physical manifestation.

I hummed in response, feigning disinterest to the best of my ability. I couldn’t tell if it worked or not.

“But I assured her that I am perfectly content with its quality, and that I didn’t think it should be a subject of so much interest.”

The words are out of my mouth before I can think to stop them.

“She seemed interested in a lot more than that,” I whispered, immediately hating how ragged my voice sounded.

Though I hadn't said much, it was enough. It was enough and I knew it.

I swallowed hard as he turned the full weight of his gaze back onto me, his eyes tracing my face like a battlefield, as all the amusement seemed to melt off his face.

He opens his mouth to say something, but is quickly cut short by a familiar kind voice.

“My apologies for the interruption, but I just wanted to extend my gratitude to both of you on behalf of me and my very drunk husband,” Carmadon said with a grin, tilting his head towards the rear end of the room where Davidson was chatting rather loudly with some diplomats and nursing an empty glass of wine.

“I know it hasn’t been the most pleasurable of evenings, so sticking around this long is greatly appreciated.”

Cal grins easily, answering for both of us, “Of course, it's no problem at all, Carmadon. Though I must say with all the hosting you do, I expected you to have a little more stamina than this,” he teased, gesturing to Carmadon’s disheveled appearance and sweat-soaked brow. And while the greenwarden didn’t look terrible, Cardamon was never one to neglect appearances, so for him to look the way he did, things must’ve been far from ideal.

Confirming my train of thought, Cardamon shook his head with a playful smile, before taking a quick glance around and leaning down to whisper, “You’d think royal diplomats would know how to read social cues.” he shook his head again in disbelief. “How many times does a man have to say ‘it’s getting late’ before they take any notice whatsoever?”

Cal chuckled as I edged forward a bit to whisper to Carmadon, “I’m starting to think that they’re considering all of us guests as well, maybe that’s why they’ve been here for so long.”

“Hmm…” he paused momentarily, “now that you mention it, it is definitely a possibility.” Pausing once more to survey the room, he nodded slowly, “Yes, I think that just might be it. After all, most of these representatives know very little of our continent… and even less of our most recognizable faces,” he added with a wink.

Blushing at the implication, I stole a glance at Cal, whose cheeks had also taken on a subtle silver glow.

“Well, in that case, thank you, Mare.” Carmadon clasped his hands, smiling warmly. “Now, if you’ll both excuse me, I must inform every familiar face to kindly leave the premises, so that perhaps all of our other guests will finally get the message.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that, “You don’t need to tell me twice,” I muttered under my breath as he walked away, approaching what looked like a few members of Monfort’s own government officials.

Without warning, Cal slipped a warm hand behind my back, silently guiding me out of the stuffy room and towards the grand staircases, leading up to the in-palace residences.

“I was beginning to think that we would be there until morning,” he mumbled, huffing a little.

“You say that as if you could’ve actually stayed awake until then.”

He admonishes me with a look, feigning annoyance, before removing his hand from my back and offering it to me as we approached the steps. I take it gratefully, thanking the gods that I had opted to wear a simpler dress for the occasion. It blissfully only reached my knees and didn’t begin to compare to some of the monstrosities that I had donned during my masquerading days.

We ascend the stairs slowly, taking our time despite our previous eagerness to leave. Whether it was the alcohol, our aching limbs, or the late hour of the night weighing us down, I didn’t know, and I didn’t care much to find out.

We were about halfway up when the thoughts that had been plaguing me earlier returned. It could’ve been the quiet atmosphere that finally surrounded us, or the fact that my senses were no longer being bombarded by the suffocating room we left behind, but it was like everything I felt earlier had suddenly multiplied, growing so intense that it was impossible to ignore. I blinked, surprised by the sudden rush of emotions that threatened to consume me whole.

Slowly, I heaved a breath, praying that it would chase away my rage. But with every blink, the images only came back stronger, somehow even more vivid than before, until I could trace every detail and count every second.

What the hell was wrong with me?

As I slowed my steps a little, I decided that this simply wasn’t going to work.

Until they were addressed, I was going to keep picturing the events from today over and over again, teetering on the edge of insanity while I was at it. Possibly even building up resentment in the midst of it all, and that was the last thing I wanted.

I had promised myself years ago, when I had been freed from a cage fueled by a twisted King’s obsession, freed from a cage that could have very easily become the rest of my life, that I would be honest, that I wouldn't let fear hold the reins, especially when it came to those that I loved most.

“That woman from earlier, did you know her at all?”

Cal halts on the steps, blinking as if just drawn out of a stupor, forcing me to stop as well. It takes him a few moments to connect the dots and understand what I was talking about. I wait patiently, not bothering to elaborate as he does.

“The representative? No, I don’t.”

I had figured as much, for the most part at least. Still, deep down, a smaller, more immature version of me coiled, dissatisfied.

“Are you sure? Not even from some Nortan event or another?”

“Yes, I’m sure. Mare, I’ve never even seen her before.” He let go of the hand that had been holding mine to run it through his hair as he heaved a breath, already exhausted by the conversation.

I could already note the slightest bit of irritation that had started to bleed into his voice, and part of me screamed not to push him further towards the edge, especially over something like this. But another part just refused to be satisfied, searching for something I couldn’t name.

“Oh, okay, it just… I just thought－” I sighed, dropping my head a bit as I took a step up the stairs, “nevermind”.

I was going to let it go, it wasn’t worth escalating this any further. It had been a long night, and at the end of the day, I didn’t want to put more pressure on him than there already was.

As if reading my thoughts, he caught up to me with a couple large steps before intertwining his arm with mine. “Come on,” he muttered, his voice soft and warm against my ear.

We make it up the rest of the stairs in a fraction of the time it took us to get through the first half.

Along the main floor that the staircases led up to was a series of elevators leading up to the much higher floors where some of the temporary residences were, one of which was Cal’s.

With his free hand, he pressed the call button against the wall, simultaneously dropping the arm that had previously been around mine to wrap it around my waist.

There wasn’t anyone else waiting for an elevator, at least that we could see, so there was really no reason for it to be taking as long as it was. And the chance that there was an obscene number of people waiting for an elevator on another floor was highly unlikely, considering that there were only a handful of individuals living in the estate at the moment, as most of tonight’s guests would be staying in nearby hotels or apartments.

Sighing, I leaned into Cal, laying my head against his shoulder, the heels that I had been idiotic enough to wear finally proving useful as they allowed me to better lean into him without that severe of a height difference. I shut my eyes for a moment, allowing my body to fully press into his and letting his warmth envelope me. He glides his hand from my waist down to my hip and squeezes firmly in response, before drawing soothing circles with his thumb through the thin fabric of my dress.

Opening my eyes to glance at him, I smirk, watching the way he tries to hide his own smirk as he looks down at me. “What?” he whispers innocently.

Laughing softly, I shake my head. I didn’t think he still had the energy to play these games.

A soft ding draws me out of my thoughts that had begun to stray into unsuitable territory, and forces us to break apart to enter the elevator. To my delight, it was completely empty, and as the door closed, I settled into the corner, resting my weight against the cool metal walls.

After he had selected his floor number, Cal joined me in my corner, resuming our position from earlier as he snaked an arm behind me and returned it to its place on my hip. With his maneuvered positioning, I ended up putting most of my weight on him instead of the wall.

Craning my neck to look up at him, I noticed how warm his chest was beneath my chin. He gave me a mischievous smile, as he wrapped his other arm around me, pressing me flush against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck in response, letting my head rest against him for a moment. I inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of burning wood that seemed to follow him everywhere, letting it cloud my mind until it was the only thing I could think of.

He had only been back from the States for a few days now, and already, he was going to have to go back soon.

And naturally, I was dreading it.

I knew it was the most practical option, the little back and forth that we have gotten into the rhythm of now, but that didn’t make it any easier.

“I missed you,” I whispered softly, my voice muffled by the hard lines of his chest.

I felt his answer in my ribcage.

“I missed you, too.”

I tilt my head upwards, lightly pressing my lips to his jaw, as he turns his head to complete the kiss. He takes his time, slowly molding his lips against mine, dragging the sensation out longer than I expected, especially considering our location.

Still, I don’t fight it, welcoming the feel of him.

When he deepens our kisses, I pull away abruptly, if only to catch my breath.

We stare at each other for a moment, both breathing a bit heavily. His lips are slightly swollen, as I’m sure mine are, and I almost smirk at the thought when I notice the intense look in his eyes, and any hint of a smirk immediately dies on my lips.

I reach up to cup his cheek, searching his eyes for any sign of distress. Any sign for why it looked like his gaze was going to burn right through me at any given moment.

“What’s wrong?”

He covered my hand with his own before bringing it to his lips. “You’re all I want,” he replied softly, ignoring my question.

I blushed at the statement, but rolled my eyes at his sappiness. The alcohol was probably getting the best of him.

I open my mouth to say just that when he shakes his head, pressing a finger to my lips, as if already anticipating my response.

“I need you to know that,” he continues, his eyes an intent. “That there is no one else in the world that I could ever want. No one but you.”

Heat flares in my cheeks as shock raced through me like adrenaline, not just because of his words or their bluntness, but the implication that he left unsaid.

Despite his exhaustion, the alcohol, and every other obstacle that would have more than excused him for not being the most intuitive tonight, he still understood. He saw through my relentless skirting around of the subject and pinned down the insecurity that even I hadn’t wanted to acknowledge, leaving it with no room to escape.

With one statement, he had smothered the doubts that had begun to bud in my mind, eradicating them before they got the chance to poison me.

He had given me exactly what I wanted, when even I hadn’t known what that was.

Overcome with emotion, I pull him towards me again, crushing our lips together fervently, forgetting where we were for a moment, until a rude ding interrupted my ministrations.

I frowned, displeased when he pulled away.

He only grinned in response, grabbing my hand and leading us out of the elevator and into the short corridor leading to his rooms.

Interlacing my fingers with his, I squeezed his hand and let him lead us down the empty corridor, past a number of vacated suites, to the last door in the hall.

I watched him fumble with the key for a few moments before following him into the dim lights of his quarters.

The ambience alone was enough to feel like a long-awaited embrace, especially after spending the greater part of the evening under cold, glaring lights and even colder stares.

As soon as we stepped over the threshold of his door, he let go of my hand to shut the door behind us and lock it with an audible click.

At the sound of the door locking, my stomach clenched in anticipation, conflicted between the room’s warmth and lighting that threatened to lull me to sleep at any moment, and the seduction that was the man standing right in front of me.

In the dim light of the room, I could just make out the effects of our little exchange on the elevator. His shirt had gotten a little more unbuttoned, and his hair was a bit more mussed than before. To my delight, he had grown it out. Enough to let the black locks curl ever so slightly at the ends. I imagined running my fingers through them as I moaned his name.

Blushing furiously at my train of thought, I ripped my gaze from him if only to regain some composure.

He must’ve noticed me staring, because he smirked and took a step forward. I mirrored him for a moment, suddenly forgetting why I had discarded my exhaustion.

It wasn't until we were within arm’s reach of one another that I remembered the words responsible for such a thing. How they had soothed me in more ways than they should have, and how they were making it nearly impossible for me to refrain from touching him at this very moment.

So I didn’t. In one quick motion, I slipped my arms around his neck and pressed my body flat against his, closing the space between us. He responded in kind, pressing a palm against the base of my spine and nudging my head up slightly to slowly bring our lips together. A soft exhale escaped my lips as I craned my neck to maintain our contact, losing myself in the heat and discernible sweetness of his mouth.

He must’ve had a dessert at today’s event, which was rare for him.

Warm hands slipping down from where they were on my back and straying to some less respectable areas below that, cut my thoughts short, instantly eliminating anything outside of the sensations he was eliciting from my mind.

And just like that, any languidity that we had established went out the window.

Suddenly, I couldn’t get enough of him. Grabbing his face, his hair, the lapels of his shirt, anything that I could get my hands on, as his lips trailed hot kisses down every bit of skin he could find. When his lips find a particularly sensitive spot behind my ear, I shiver involuntarily and let out a low whine.

He growls deep in his chest in response and turns to press me against the wall, before burying his head in the crook of my neck. His breath so hot I expect it to burn the sensitive skin, but it doesn’t, it never does. Instead, he nips at the skin lightly before pressing warm, open-mouth kisses against the abused flesh. I let out a pleased groan in response, gripping his shoulder so tightly I wouldn’t be surprised if it bruised.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted our reflection in a mirror across his room. The sight was enough to spool my insides even tighter than they already were.

I try and fail to keep a wicked grin from forming on my lips.

Apparently, he wasn’t as tired as I thought.