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Chapter Text

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Chapter Text

She scoped into the fast runner. A shot. Another miss. “Bugger…” she grumbled under her breath. She watched as the young man ran across the battlefield. He made a mistake stopping for a moment to breathe and grab a health pack. Sniper took this chance, the bullet whizzing into his head. The BLU bastard deserves it, he kept sneaking up to shoot Michelle.

“Get fucked, mate!” She flaunted. It was rude, exceptionally so, ‘professionals have standards’ she said during the director’s stupid little… ad? Propaganda video? No idea. Either way, it was dumb and revealed her location. Didn’t matter, though. She’d respawn and they’d forget or she could just change spots. She liked this nest, though, would hate to see it found. 

Worth it. She thought to herself. She scoped in to see if anyone was on their way towards her. “Mission ends in 30 seconds.” The announcer shouted. She sighed in relief. No BLU wanker was anywhere near the point, so she just watched the battlefield from her windowsill. 

She had zoned out for a bit, watching bullets whizz when her ponytail was suddenly yanked back.

Damnit. She thought. Fucking scouts-! She gasped when the scout kissed her. On the lips. 

What.

What the fuck.

She just stared at him. The BLU fucker just smirked, looking back at her.

“Bloody hell, mate! What the fuck’s that for?!” She questions, finally able to make words, breathing heavy. 

“3…”

He blew a kissy face and ran down the stairs.

“2…”

His footsteps echoed in sniper’s mind.

“1…”

Why..?

“VICTORY!” the announcer told their team.

—————

Sniper walked into the locker room without a thought in her head. Not any meaningful thoughts, simply just one: why would he do that?

She opened up her locker, number 351. There were not 350 other lockers, the numbers seemed random. The one next to hers was 270, so she didn’t put thought into it. In the locker was a bottle of beer, a pack of smokes, and a lighter. She grabbed a cigarette and the light, walked out into the hallway and smoked away her questions.

She set out the smoke when others started walking in. Heavy and Medic both covered in absolutely disgusting blood, those …gays… hugging and giggling, gross. Demo and Soldier ran in, hand in hand. She never knew if they were homos or not, but she always guessed. 

She got back into the locker room, put away her lighter and closed the locker. She rubbed her temples, the incessant screeching from the men pissed her off. She hung out in a shadowy spot so that the other mercenaries wouldn’t see her in the showers… or at all. 

Being alone meant she had to think. Think about what happened at the end of that round. Think about the man who came in, pulled her- usually hidden under her shirt- ponytail and kissed her. What man would ever want to kiss her? Was he gay? Did he know that she was a woman? If he knew, was she gonna get ratted out and raped or something? If the men here knew she was a woman, she’d be fucked and fired. No, if he knew she was a woman, he’d have just fucked her then and there, why would she kiss her? He must be gay, that must be it.

As her vision started blurring, the engineer sat beside her. “You doin’ alright there, Mick?” He asked. She snapped out of it for a moment. “Oh. Ah, I’m alright, mate.” He looked at her with concern for a moment. “Why’s your hair so long?” He asked. She must have forgotten to tuck it into her shirt. “I like growin’ it out. Don’t really bother me, and don’t wanna cut it.” He nods and gets up. “Hey, if you’re not feelin’ great, tell me… Unless it’s a physical problem, then go to Medic.” He chuckled to himself and went to the showers.

Thoughts whirred in her head for like 10 minutes and the noise was finally done. Everyone was gone, done showering, and she had the room to herself. She got up, taking her hands off her face. She got off the bench, bringing herself to the showers’ door. No water was running, no figures in the window. She went in.

The air was foggy, and did not smell good, at all. Thankfully, it was not unbearable. Still sucked. Men were disgusting, but, meh, there’s probably a man out there she’d marry, though she has not found an example yet.

She grabbed her men’s deodorant and men’s shampoo, setting it near the shower. She took off her vest, shirt, and binder- worn so she wasn’t the biggest giveaway ever, men don’t have tits. She took the rest off, pants, boots, hat, ect. And got in the shower. 

She cleaned off, thinking, instead of the enemy scout, how much she missed being feminine. She had to wear a binder, use men’s products, even though she’d have preferred smelling good, she was a ‘man’. She only sounded like one from the smoking and vocal exercises. 

Her breath hitched for a moment. She’d told herself before she was never going to think about this again. She spoke. Not Mick Mundy, Michelle Mundy. “Hey, mish.” She said. Not a phony voice she’d put on for years now, her. She sighed, going back to ignoring her feelings.

She finished her shower, barely feeling clean, drying off, and getting dressed up again. She got out of the room and went to her locker. She grabbed a smoke and lighter, and went out in the hallway. She smoked again, hoping the vice would relieve her from all the stress. 

It didn’t.

It didn’t help the questions, it didn’t help the regret. 

She puts out the cig and goes back inside, throwing it away. She sat in her corner, bawling her eyes out, curled up in a ball with her hat laid on the floor nearby.

She didn’t know how much she cried. It was a lot. Long enough, in fact, for Dell fucking Conagher to swing by. He creaked open the door. When she heard this, she stopped. Was it dinner already? Has she missed dinner?

“Who the hell is it?” She asked, between short sobs. She remembered to use the right voice, trying not to make a habit out of speaking normally. 

“Snipes, you in ‘ere?” He asked. She wiped off a tear, not wanting to respond. 

“I’m not hungry.” She told him. He started walking in. “Go. Away.”

“I’m not just here for dinner, I heard you sobbing like a lil’ girl in here.” A little girl? Did he really just fucking say that? That is not helping.

“Leave me alone or I’m killing you once respawn is back on.” She threatened. 

“Hey, no need to be so sour, what’s going on?” She hit the locker next to where she was sitting, making a loud banging noise, causing engineer to flinch. She grabbed her kukri.

She stood up, face tear-stained, into the light. If engie wasn’t gonna go away, she’d make him.

“Maybe I won’t even wait until respawn’s back on if you keep pushing me.” She raised her kukri, pointing it at him. 

“Hey hey hey, wait, pardner! I- calm down!” He backed away. “I just wanna help, Mick!” He looked horrified. He couldn’t be revived if she hurt him. He knew that and didn’t want to risk getting closer to the knife approaching his neck.

The look on his face made her feel guilty. She was overreacting, she realized. She dropped the kukri, with a clang as it hit the floor. She started sobbing again, this time into engie’s shoulder, wrapping her arms around him. He set his arms around her. 

“Hey, it’s alright, I’m here.” He tells her. “I’m here.” It was comforting, despite the fact she’d never tell him what was going on, and hopefully, he’d never know. She doesn’t know, maybe the bastard looked through her medical records. They’re men, those fucking perverts would probably do that.

“Thanks, mate. I’m not really in the mood for explaining right now, but I’m feeling better.” She told him, letting go.

“Good to hear. You going to dinner?” He asked, and she considered for a moment.

“Yeah, s’pose I am pretty hungry. Whose night is it?” She admitted, trying to still be manly.

“It’s Heavy’s.” He answers. Heavy was a pretty good chef. It wasn’t bad, unlike quite a few of the others. She still looked up to it, despite none of these men knowing how to cook. Definitely better than, like, soldier, but they took soldier and pyro out of the food loop since they respectively accidentally and purposefully set something on fire each time. 

“I’ll go clean off my face. Wait for me, alright mate?” She walked to the showers and splashed water on her face. She looked at herself in the mirror. 

A man. 

A man by most standards, if you didn’t mind the long hair. In all honesty, she kept it long just because she wanted to keep a bit of her in her new persona. She liked having long hair when she could be a woman, and she liked having long hair when she was pretending to be a man. 

She got back out and waved to engie. “Let’s get goin’, then.” And he nodded to her. 

————

They entered the kitchen to see all the mercs. Heavy was serving some sandviches, one of the things she looked up to most. They tasted good, and heavy always allowed her to have seconds. He was a nice guy, helpful, good chef. She assumed it was due to having sisters.

The others? She never bothered to learn about scout, he was fast, wow. Mostly just an arrogant shithead. But now, looking at him reminded her of what happened last round. She looked away quickly to soldier.

Soldier was stupid. What’s there to say about him? He’s annoying and dumb and she doesn’t like him. She doesn’t get what demo sees in him.

Demo’s a weird, gay drunkard. He blabbered on about nothing and it was weird. The guy and his liver are probably divorced or some shit. Loves alcohol much as pyro loves fire.

Pyro scares her. They’re a crazy maniac for flames and destruction and she doesn’t get why the base isn’t burnt down by now. Reminds her of medic, in a sense that they’re both insane.

Eugh. She hates medic. He’s the only one who knows she’s a woman because you can’t just hide that during exams. She tried, she really did, but whatever. They were private and she asked him to tell nobody, not even his dumbass boyfriend. Okay, she didn’t say that but she wanted to. He’s also just crazy.

She already talked about heavy, and she’s already talked about Medic and Heavy being weirdass homos. Heavy’s such a nice guy (not in an ‘I like him’ way) so she doesn’t get why he likes that maniac so much.

Engineer was a great guy. She liked him, in a fatherly way. Didn’t appreciate the prying, though. Didn’t get why he cares so much about her.

…she… didn’t… uh… like herself. She sucked. She was a lonely weirdo girl who sits and shoots people and barely moves. She’d like to be a woman again. Well- she was a woman but- you know. 

That just leaves the other silent killer, spy. Spy keeps backstabbing her. Not this spy, but either way he was mostly just grabbing food and going back to his room, so that was the only frame of reference for her.

She walked over to the counter and grabbed a sandvich. “Ah, is sniper doing alright?” She’d probably indulge his small talk on a day she wasn’t ‘sobbing like a lil’ girl’ earlier. “I’m fine.” She said dimly. Heavy tilted his head but didn’t want to pester her.

She sat down next to engineer. There was a kindly glance given to her. She didn’t return it. She didn’t have the energy for that. She just ate her sandvich, picked up her dish and set it in the sink. She decided to not stay any longer but-

“Herr Sniper, could you zee me in a few minutes.” Fuck.

She just wanted to eat her food, get out, and go to sleep. But no! Of course, she has to go ‘see’ Medic for whatever reason. She grumbled something and changed directions from her van to the examination room. 

When she got there, she sat on the examination chair. She takes off and plays with her hat, waiting anxiously for medic to come in.

And in a few minutes, medic shut the door behind him.

“You’re doing a good job, none of zhe others suspect a thing!” He congratulates her. 

“Why am I here?” She asked, fed up with his bullshit. 

“Ah, ve all heard you crying.” He told her. Her face turned red in embarrassment.

“Wh- why is that important, mate.” She mumbles. “You’re just being an asshole.”

“I vas curious to know if you had ztarted your period.” He asked her. “Being emotional iz very common due to a hormonal imbalance during a period.”

“Wh. No. I’d tell you if I was bleeding out my nether regions.” She said snarkily.

“Zhe snappiness is not needed.” He responded. “Vhy vere you crying zo much?” He sounded actually concerned. She looked away from him.

“I just miss bein’ a woman, mate. Don’t know why I’m being so emotional about it…” Her fake voice cracked at the end, revealing her actual voice, the one she missed so much.

“Ah. I zee. Would you like antidepressants ?” He asked. “I’d like zhis to not affect your performance.”

“I dunno. I told myself I’d never think about it again, but taking the binder off and seeing myself- real self- in the mirror to shower just makes the tears flow, it reminds me of what I’m missing. Coulda been an actor, model, something like that. Antidepressants would be nice.” She responded, maybe too honestly. She’d given up on the voice, no use keeping it up if medic already knew.

“Alright, I’ll get you some and add zhis to zhe records.” The records. She hated that he had those records. Every single incriminating thing about her was in there, mainly just the one. Now that she thought about it, everything about everyone. She was curious to know everyone else’s secrets, but knew better. He walked over, grabbing a folder of papers. 

“How d’yknow nobody will find em’?” She asked him, hopeful they weren’t just under some padlock. Someone like spy, engie, maybe some others, could open a padlock and learn this. And… she didn’t wanna think about that too much.

“Eazy! It’z all in German.” Oh. Yeah, that’d be a good solution. She nodded, content with the answer. He sets down his folder after writing whatever he wrote there, and shuffled through his closet, landing on a bottle of antidepressants. He wrote instructions on a slip of paper and gave it to sniper.

“Once a day after breakfazt. You know how to zwallow a pill, correct?” He asked. She looked at him with a confused look.

“I’m a full grown adult, Medic. I know how to swallow a pill.”

“You’d be zurprized, I’ve zeen some very dumb people!” He chuckled a bit. 

“Whatever. Give me the pills already.” She said, grouchily. She just wanted to get back to her camper.

“Ah, frua Michelle, I ztill have one more question. Vould you like to ztart taking teztosterone to assizt ?” She thought for a moment. That was a big dedication.

“I… no thanks. I’d like to still be a gal when I’m done.” She explained, and Medic nodded. He passed the note and pill bottle to sniper, and she stood up out of the chair.

“Zee you at breakfast!” He told her. It still creeped her out that he knew she was a woman. He was so… friendly about it, too. Was he trying to hit on her or something?

————

She walked over to her camper van, opening up the back door and entering. She fell onto her pillow and figured she should take off her binder so she could breathe or something like that in her sleep.

She changed, now without binder, and laid down, looking at the ceiling. She sighed, heaving herself to the side and going to sleep.

Chapter Text

She dragged herself out of her sleep, pushing the blankets to the bottom of the bed. She sat up on the bedside, looking around her room. She got up and leaned on her desk, looking at herself in the mirror.

Barely even looked like a woman anymore.

She’d cut her hair, and while she enjoyed short hair, she didn’t like making it man-short. Thankfully, not a pixie cut, yes, but still shorter than she’d have liked. She enjoyed when her hair flowed just past her shoulders.

The shorter hair probably helped, maybe less air friction… or something like that.

“Hey, Jeremy!” She was taken aback by soldier slamming the door open, making her fall to the floor.

“Oh my god- Soldier, why do you know my name?!” She questioned. It wasn’t her actual name, just the one of the lies she put on the document when she joined. Her actual name was Jennifer. She figured the two names were pretty close.

“Mrs Pauling told me!” He shouted, unbearably loud as usual. Mrs Pauling was pretty, very pretty. Gorgeous, really. She didn’t realize she was blushing, but she sure realized when soldier yelled out.

“Why is your face pink!?” She jumped back at the question.

“AH! Nothing, nothing, don’t- don’t fucking worry ‘bout it!” She panicked, trying to look at least somewhat cool. She was not.

“Come on! It’s breakfast! Get dressed, maggot!!” He commanded. She got up and closed the door on him.

“Okay, that’s enough, Soldier. Go eat.” She pushed him out of the room.

She must not have locked the door. She remembered this time and locked it. She walked over to her dresser, grabbing her clothes. She grabbed her dog tags from the side table and ran off, not bothering to clean up her room.

———

She rushed into the kitchen. She was hungry as hell, she had ignored dinner last night after she passed out in the locker room after forgetting to drink water for way too long in the blazing New Mexico heat.

Pyro was making toast. They were quite good at it. You’d assume the pyromaniac would burn stuff, but they’re pretty good. She grabbed some toast and sat down in her seat. She slathered some butter on it and took a big bite.

She looked at solly, cramming toast in his mouth and chugging milk like a lunatic. Men.

She took another bite of her toast, looking at Heavy this time. “Hey, Heavy.” She said, trying to engage some sort of conversation.

“Sorry little man, I’m not looking for small talk right now.” He responded, disappointing her. Okay, guess she’s eating alone. She finished off the toast and went to the setup room, playing with her scattergun. Rolling around the bullets in her hand, waiting for everyone else to get there.

She remembered she was allowed to look around before the round started, and she walked out. It was still early so nobody but one person from RED team was there, except the sniper. He was practicing his aim, shooting cans in the distance. He was scarily accurate.

Something drew her in, oddly enough. The skill was impressive and all, but for some reason she couldn’t look away. She sat down on a crate and watched as he shot things in the distance. She zoned out, and suddenly she was dead, in the respawn room.

Must have seen her. She noticed engineer had finished eating and was looking through some old blueprints.

“Whatcha doin’?” She walked over and pestered him.

“By golly, go away, scout. I’m lookin’ at old designs.” Okay, rude. She listened, walking off. She would have kept annoying him but that guy had a metal hand that can and probably would kill her.

She was curious to see the sniper again. The sight was addicting, seeing him hit every single shot. She stepped out again and saw him aiming at scout and decided against getting closer.

Oddly enough, the other half of the team had all filed in during the minute (maybe 5 minutes, maybe more. who's to say!) she was out there. Sniper, Soldier, Pyro, and Heavy have all entered. Pyro and Engineer are talking about something. She never understood how Engie could understand the mumbles, but he did.

She waited patiently, sitting on the bench with her hands fidgeting. A few more minutes passed and medic and spy had both walked in. She gave spy a hateful look. Bastard kept picking on her.

“Mission begins in 30 seconds.” The announcer warned.

She ran her fingers through her frustratingly short hair, waiting for the round to begin. “Dude, I hate waiting for this shit.” She complained.

“Little man, have patience. Grab gun.” Heavy responded. She hoped someone would agree with her, but no, Heavy’s gonna yell at her. She did that, though, and grabbed her bat.

She walked over to the door as the announcer started counting down.

“5… 4… 3…. 2…” she stiffened up.

“1!” She rushed out, going to the control point immediately. The RED team rushed out as well, their scout tripping on a rock. She chuckled a bit, moving towards a closed building so she could flank them.

She reached a pocketed soldier, obliterating the BLU team. She got behind the two, shooting down the medic with her scattergun and getting a hit off on the soldier before getting headshot by the RED sniper.

She respawned, upset she couldn’t kill the soldier but still proud of the medic kill. Hopefully that would help. She ran out into the battlefield again, this time running up the stairs of the tower that she saw the sniper on.

She got to the top, staying silent. She pulled out her bat and hit him in the head and shot him with her scattergun. He had no time to respond and was dead right after.

She ran back down, giggling like a little kid. She rushed to the point, seeing as nobody was on it. She saw the enemy scout attempt to catch up and kill her on the point but easily maneuvered around and dodged the man’s bullets, getting a kill on him. The point was captured.

She saw that the sniper respawned. He looked pissed, looking for her. Due to this, scout hid behind the fence. She peeked to the side to see him, angrily rushing up the stairs. Oh my god, he was adorable. She rushed up the stairs, her footsteps still quiet but quick.

She got up to the top again, and heard that the point had been captured. She wanted to say something but she’d get caught. She put her bat between his neck and killed him.

She couldn’t wait to see the look on his face. She ran to grab a health pack after getting hit by an engineer on the way down. She regained her HP, and cooled off for a second. She looked at the corner. Oh, and there she was. Sniper, fuming, and scout imagined puffs of steam coming from her ears! She looked red as a tomato, about to break her rifle.

She chuckled, and focused back on the match. One minute left, she saw a sentry gun pushing back BLU and decided to take care of it. Running around it so it couldn’t target her in time, she shot her scattergun at it. The engineer, lazing back, hadn’t noticed until it was too late.

He went running at there, but before he could get to her, she broke the sentry. She focused on killing the engineer, shooting at her. She tried dodging, but the determined and vengeful RED engie was too focused.

She respawned and rushed out again. Now that the team could start pushing, she tried hiding behind the RED team to flank, but didn’t get any kills. Instead, she had unfortunately run out of energy very fast- the respawn didn’t help in that aspect- and needed to take a break.

The engineer had come back for more and got a few shots on her. She rushed to the side of the building and grabbed a health pack and took a breath, adjusting her binder, causing her more strife than she’d hoped. And he got headshot.

And you know what the cute-ass RED sniper said? “Get fucked, mate!” She was charmed, in a sense, that she had such a spot in her head. And when she respawned, the announcer yelled “Mission ends in 30 seconds!”. Damn it.

She could still do her plan, though.

She hid behind some fencing when she got out. Her teammates were being useless, and while she may have been able to cap the point at the end, she had other ideas. She snuck through bits of rubble, fences, shrubs, all that kind of thing.

The climbed up the stairs, and saw that sniper. She knew what she had to do. She spotted some hair in his shirt and pulled his head back. The sniper looked at her with alarm, and instead of killing her or something, she kissed him.

She backed off, and instead of getting killed, the RED sniper’s face was flushed. Goddamn adorable.

“Bloody hell mate! The fuck’s that for?!” He exclaimed.

“3!” The announcer yelled. That was her queue!

She gave snipes a kissy face, and instead of killing him, she just stared in awe.

“2!”

She was surprised she didn’t die. Anyone else would have made use of that vulnerability, but he didn’t.

“1!!”

She hadn’t even reached the bottom, but she didn’t care. She'd gotten what she wanted.

“YOU FAILED!”

No, she won.

Chapter Text

She rubbed her eyes, waking up from her rest. The light shone blindingly from the  window, making her eyes strain. She grumbled, turning to the side and out of the bed. She brought herself lazily to her closet, clothes laid in piles instead of dressers or drawers. It wasn’t like she had other clothes. She had the ones the administrator gave her.

She’d prefer to wear a frilly dress, spend her time doing something that didn’t involve killing everyone. She enjoyed the job, enough to stay for the money, but it got dull at some point. She wished she didn’t stay here all day, wished she could see the thrills of life again.

No! This was her life. This was all she’d do again, she’d live and die (quite a few times) and be alone forever.

She grumbled, remembering that didn’t matter. That fucking scout didn’t matter, her old life didn’t matter, and if she didn’t perform at 100% despite all of the shit happening in her life, she’d probably get yelled at by soldier, or worse yet, the administrator. 

She picked up her clothes, going and changing. She decided she’d just ask medic to scoop this memory out of her brain, and she’d never worry about it again. She’d forget Scout’s cute face, she’d forget being a woman, and she’d be happy.

Once she was done changing, she lazed herself out of the camper. She walked out to the cafeteria again, and slumped at the table without a care who she sat next to. She’d sit next to whoever she fucking wanted-

It was scout. She sat next to scout.

It wasn’t the scout. It wasn’t the one that lingered in her head like a parasitic worm. But that stupid little arrogant face, from either team, still flustered her. She ignored that. It wasn’t important. She was eating breakfast and going to work. That’s what she was doing. Eating whatever- whoever- made for breakfast. It didn’t matter what slop she ate, what disgusting man served it, just that she performed well.

It was engineer’s day, he served buttered corn on the cob. The food tasted great. She liked the engie, the only guy who wasn’t a disgusting homosexual and actually bothered to ask how she was doing.

She never felt anything for him, despite that, which confused her in a way. But that asshole? The scout? Why did she… care this much?

She ate her food merrily, pushing thoughts to the back of her head. They’d explode at some point, like yesterday, she knew that much, but it was no use lingering on it all day. That was an off-work thing, she’d worry about it off work.

Except, the bastard did it during work. She came up, out of her way, despite the open point, to kiss her in the most dramatic way possible.

She didn’t get what the bugger saw in her. She was alone all the time, doing nothing, not running out, cool like scout. 

She got up, not bothering to wait for anyone else to come along with, and nobody seemed bothered by it anyways, so why the hell should she care? The only thing she cared- was supposed to care about… was the point, or the cart, sometimes, and other people’s heads. Preferably aiming at them.

When she made her way to the field, she saw it was a payload map. She enjoyed the payload maps, it meant she could move around a bit, instead of sitting in one spot. Made her legs hurt less by the end of the round. In this case, it made it harder for the enemy… one specific enemy that would probably try to do the same trick twice. She hoped to god that she didn’t try that.

She went to the second point, little energy left. She hoped to regain some of it by doing something, you know, practicing, something like that. She was already scarily accurate, but it kept her mind off it.

She shot at a loose rock, a piece of stray wood, a sign, a box, anything that stood out and would make a noise when shot at. Only a few minutes passed when she heard a voice. She recognized it. It was her. Again. Did she come out early, just to find her?! The bastard’s lucky she had to keep a good score. If not, she’d track down that dumbass and kill her every single time.

She waited at the corner for the scout to come out. She’d be there. And she’d be dead once she could see her.

The scout kept yelling, but she got close enough this time that she could make out what she was saying. 

“Snipes! Come here, snipe! I won’t fight, just get over here!” She barreled toward her at surprising speeds. She wasn’t ready for that, she had expected her to be wandering or something, but instead she missed and didn’t have enough time to reload. The scout ran right at her, and assuming she’d try something again, she grabbed her kukri and aimed it at the man running towards her.

She stopped in her tracks and instead of doing something normal, like fighting back, or, falling into the trap. No, instead she stopped before the rock mound started curving up, and put out her hands.

“C’mon, let’s play!” She shouted from below, trying to play rock paper scissors with her. Rock paper scissors? On the battleground? With her enemy? Her, now, mortal enemy. 

She started saying something. She stopped herself. 

 “I hate you.” 

“Come on, roo!” roo..? Did- she just say roo? A pet name? What the hell?

She didn’t know if she should kill her or just play the game. Maybe she’d stop being so annoying if she just went with it. Oh, but she was getting that once the round begun. She could just say it was because the cart moved faster with a scout on it. Wouldn’t be that hard to believe a lie like that.

Either way, it was more worth it to just do it anyway. Maybe it wouldn’t be held against her. She rolled her eyes, ignoring the red color dusted on her cheeks.

She hopped down, bringing her hands up too. 

“Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!” Scout exclaimed, putting out a rock, sniper putting out scissors.

“Oh, so what’s the loser … er, winner do?” She asked, unsure of where this was going.

“Mh, whatever I want, honey.”

“I did not agree to that- and do not call me that.”

“Too bad, because I’ve decided I’m gonna watch you practice until the match starts.”

Her breath hitched. “Why… why should you wanna do that…” she mumbled, cheeks becoming brighter.

She didn’t answer, just jumped up on the rock, patting the ground where she wanted sniper to sit. She paused for a moment. She did win, so, it’s only fair.

She picked back up her rifle and started shooting at stuff. Scout scooched in closer. She gripped the rifle tighter. She kept shooting.

—————

Scout jumped off and blew her a kiss. People had started coming and she didn’t want others to see them.

She was surprised she’d won the round of rock paper scissors. She was planning to play the round and then go far away and watch her. But this was so much better, staying cuddled up next to her and just watching. She assumed sniper was just being a good sport, and doubted it’d work again, or changed anything.

She ran to her side of the map and watched as sniper and engineer started talking, and decided she might try to talk to someone on her side. Nobody liked her on BLU team, though. She was apparently very annoying, according to… everyone on BLU? She just wanted someone to talk to.

She slumped onto the bench. Nobody near her, nobody bothered to check on her. She fidgeted nervously, looking around as the others came in. She waited until the announcer yelled out ‘mission begins in 10 seconds!’ And stood up.

She didn’t appreciate thinking like this. She’d do something to make sniper like her, then she’d have a friend or, hopefully more. She hoped at least that sniper wouldn’t hate her.

The round went well. She got a medic kill, the opposing scout, the engineer (who was still angry about last match), and a demoman. But she never got to kill sniper. She was too quick for that. She was dissatisfied with it, but they still won despite being killed only a few minutes after spawning each time.

————

She grumbled, standing up to find engineer was done with breakfast. 

“Hey, snipes!” He exclaimed. She sighed and walked up to him. “Hello, engineer.” She sneered, trying to get him to go away without saying say.

“Who poisoned your food?” He asked, sitting down on a rock with sniper. She ignored him. “Mick?” She froze for a second but then remembered that’s her name, that thinking too hard would lead to a worse round.

“The scout on their team keeps killing me.” She answered, not going into any more depth than that. Not mention how she kissed her, not mention how she let her go, not mention how it was lingering in her mind, not mention how she got flustered seeing either of the scouts.

“You sure it’s on purpose?” He questioned, and she pushed her hat down.

“I dunno. Maybe. It seems intentional. And he keeps talking like we’re pals.” She rolls her eyes and slumps down more.

“Weird. I mean, I heard about our demo n’ that BLU soldier, but that was outside of war.” He responded, tilting his head and looking out into the distance. “You know, it’s combined day. Administrator said it was to make sure we stayed on our toes. Maybe ask him what’s up then.” She sighed. He was right, like usual.

She stood up, dusting herself off. “See you.” She told him, walking off to the respawn again. She sat down on the bench and waited for the round to start. 

“Begin!” The announcer yelled, and she ran out. She perched herself at the edge of  a rock, scoping into the entrances, flicking between them to make sure scout didn’t try tricking her.

Setup ended and she focused in, looking for her. She saw her hat for a fleeting moment and shot. And she was dead, that was it. She flicked over to others, hit a body shot on the heavy and got seen and hid behind a rock. Shit. She didn’t hear his gun revved anymore and started scoping in and killed him.

She killed an opposing sniper, then noticed scout again. She was already running and sniper wasn’t fast enough. She turned behind her and grabbed her kukri. She waited a bit and saw nothing. She lowered her guard and picked up her rifle again. 

She aimed at the medic and missed. Tried again, missed. Her head wasn’t clear enough for this shit. The BLU team reached the first checkpoint and she got up to move.

Just then, she felt an arm on her neck. She was in a chokehold. That fucking scout… she thought as she was pulled backwards. 

“Scout, I swear to god!” She barked, struggling in her grip. “I’m gonna fucking..!” She whacked scout. “Jeremy!” She yelled, but scout wasn’t killing her for some reason. “Let me- go!” Scout grabbed her chin, and she froze. She was prettier than sniper had realized.

She shivered, waiting for scout to do something. “Why are you being such an asshole?” She asked, grabbing sniper’s hat. “It makes me wanna…” she didn’t continue. Instead she kissed her.

Oh. My god. She could have sworn it didn’t feel this good last time. She melted into it, leaning onto her. Scout let go, and ran off. Sniper just stood there, staring. How could she just… move on like that? After something so bold and… good. It felt good. She never felt that way kissing any other man.

She grabbed her rifle and moved up. BLU was already halfway to the next point, presumably because of sniper slacking. A few kills was enough to push RED. A kill on the medic to make it easier to kill the heavies and soldiers, or whoever was being healed, but she was too busy being kissed to kill people. 

She set herself up, and she died to a soldier.

She respawned, grumbling, and got herself back to her spot. She just couldn’t hit her shots with her head like this, mixed up and all. She tried so hard not to think about it, but the only other thing to think of was being a woman, and that was a can of worms she told herself to have scooped out of her brain.

She wondered if she could tell someone about this. Who would she even tell? Medic would try psycho-analysing her. Engineer would think she’s gay. Nobody else bothered talking to her.

She was, though, able to hit her shots on the scout. Seeing her stupid little face running around all arrogant like that, with that cute little smirk on her face, giving those little fucking glances at her. God dammit, why was she thinking like this?! This is the enemy. The enemy she wasn’t going to let win.

Nevermind. BLU won. She ended up scoring a total of… 5 points. At the bottom of the board…

Soldier confronted sniper in the locker room. “Why are you slacking, sister?!” She jumped back, not expecting the yelling nor the ‘sister’. It was a common phrase for him, but to her?

“You were 10 points behind everyone! This is the least you’ve ever scored, maggot!” He pointed at her, and she scooted back.

What was her excuse supposed to be? She couldn’t remember. This was too stressful, she couldn’t do this. She sputtered, not able to make words. 

“I- I was- uh- ki-killing scout, ‘cause he- he like, pushes the cart faster and I, uhm, wanted to stop, uh, that.” She hoped to god he didn’t mention the stuttering and embarrassment. 

He looked her up and down. She tried looking normal. “…okay, but toughen up, sissy!” He shouted, prancing out of the locker room. She exhaled the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. She just sat there and looked at the inside of her locker.

A lighter, a pack of cigs, a bottle of vodka.

…vodka.

…

She grabs the bottle and looks at herself in the glass, and takes a chug. She set it down and runs her fingers through her hair. Her dumbass hair, her dumbasss thoughts telling her to keep drinking until she passes out and dies.

Her breath was heavy, and she took another chug. She stood up and walked out of the room.

When she reached the cafeteria, she saw scout. That was right, yeah, she was gonna ask her… what was she gonna ask her? She sat down at the table. “Scout.” She said, still sober enough to think.

“What?” Scout asked, being the little fucker he was… oh she was gonna… smash his head in… or something… 

“You’re the fuckin’ worst. I hate you, man. Stop kissin’ me.” She grumbled and  rubbed her eyes. Like… you know, like the ones who kept looking at her pretty face. Er, something… 

What was she thinkin’ about again? God scout was cute. No! No that was the… bad one.

Scout was saying something… what was he saying? Somethin’ cute, probably. She can’t remember what happened from there.

“Sniper?”

“Sniper?! Sniper! Wake up, zniper!” 

 She woke up, a voice pounding in her head. 

In front of her was medic with concern on his face. “My god, sniper, what zhe hell?!” He yelled out. 

“What, doc?! You need to calm down!” Her head pounded.

“Michelle, you’ve been passed out for hours now, what happened?” He yelled at her again. Maybe it wasn’t yelling, but everything was loud to her right now.

“I was drinking, you know, like just a bit, though, it’s fine.” He just stared. What the hell’s that for?

“That was like, pure alcohol! Vhen was the last time you drank, you could have died if your body vasn’t used to it.” She looked up for a second.

“Uh, I don’t know. Like… I dunno.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “I need to sober up for these questions…” Medic handed her a glass of water.

“Please do, I don’t vant you dying from zhis. Something else is on your mind, I can tell.” She drank the water and sat up.

“Uhm… it’s comin’ back t’ me… okay, right, feelin’ better after that nap, actually.” She looked around and stopped for a few seconds. “Promise you tell nobody?” She asked, shrinking down.

“Your thoughts are safe vith me!” He answered, leaning forward. 

“Okay, so, I was just doing some normal stuff, right? The scout, like, the BLU one, he kissed me. And I feel weird now, and he did it again last round, but it like, felt good.” She responded. “I feel crazy. Like. That’s the enemy, he’s supposed to kill me!” She continued. “I was gonna ask him during dinner but I got yelled at by soldier and, eh, y’know what happened from there…” 

“Oh. Yes, that is veird.” He scratched the back of his neck. She stretched.

“Right, can you scoop that thought out of my brain?” She asked. “I don’t wanna think ‘bout it. It’s messing up my aim.”

“Hm… yes, I mean I did zhat for demo, but he kept asking. it’s not an exact science. I don’t recommend it. Vodka is not a good idea either. You just gotta ask him. You know, when not hammered.” He replied helpfully. Same thing that engie said. 

“Well… I, ah, fine. I’m gonna go to sleep for the night.” She got up and walked off to her room. “Don’t write anything I said down.” She closed the door behind her. 

She was so dead. She’s never liked a man, what if she’ll never like a man? Be left alone forever? She just wants to go home, back to the parents she never knew. This was all too much for her.

She gets to her camper van to see the BLU scout sitting next to it, asleep. It was pretty late, but- wait, what?!

“Scout, what the hell are you doing here?!” She jumped back. “How do you even know where my van is?!” Scout woke up, screaming.

“AH- oh, oh, hi snipes! I was worried about you!” She cooled off. “I… wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“Why the hell do you care so much?!” She yelled at her, pissed.

“Because- I…” her breath hitched. “I’ll go.” She walked off.

“Good, I never wanna see you again, asshole!!” She screeched, slamming the door closed.

Chapter Text

That one hurt. A lot more than the other times, because this time, she really thought she’d get to her. She’s trying. But that doesn’t matter. She’ll never have any friends, or a lover, or anything. She didn’t get what brought her to sniper.

It was horrifying to see sniper just pass out in front of her while trying to eat. She didn’t know what happened, she just knew it wasn’t good at all. She rushed her to RED’s Medic and was very close to crying. She hoped to god nobody saw how concerned she looked when she carried her on her shoulder. Horrified.

Because, if sniper was dead, she didn’t know what to do.

Probably die. 

Because without her, she had nobody. 

And she couldn’t live in that world. She’d die with sniper and fuck with her in hell instead. 

She wanted to cry now just thinking about it. God.

But sniper was okay. She was alive and seemed alright. She just wished she would like her back instead of calling her an asshole.

She was trying to be helpful and kind and she was vulnerable for that. With the insults in the battleground, at least she was expecting them. A “whatever, I’m going to bed” or something would have been fine. She would have preferred a kiss, but that wasn’t happening. She knew that much. 

She went inside to the hallway and to her room, sitting down and putting her hands between her legs.

She wasn’t that annoying, right..? Yeah, she could be a bit talkative or whatever, but, she talked about interesting stuff, right? She thought back to old conversations. She was talking about spy, her dad, a party she went to, and most recently, looking out for sniper. Those were interesting things, right?

She looked to the side. The clock read 10:37. She had waited there for a while. She laid down and grabbed her blankets, wrapping herself up tightly and quietly weeping into them, tears staining her blanket. She rolled to look at the ceiling as tears streamed down her face.

I’m so fucking pathetic. He’ll never like me back. He probably likes girls and I can’t just tell him that. I’ll never find love, or friendship, or anything. I’m just going to be alone forever.

She sat up and reached for her drawer. Inside was a worn out pencil and paper. She grabbed them and started drawing. It started off as drawing her bat and gun, heavy’s Sasha, but it ended up becoming drawings of sniper and her holding hands and hugging and cuddling. When she had finally calmed down, she realized how much it had descended. God, sniper was amazing.

She set down her paper and pencil, and it was nice. Drawing helped. 11:04.

————

When she woke up, she heard a knock on her door. Lots of knocks, actually. And a foot tapping on the rocky sand.

“Bloody… who is it?!” She rubbed her eyes, straining at the light pooling in. A subtle murmur came from the van door. 

“Who the hell- SPEAK UP!” she screeched, sitting up and throwing the blankets to the wall. 

“Eek!” The voice exclaimed. Who did that remind her of…

“Snipes, it’s- uh- it’s scout, I wanna- I- wanna talk!”

“I!” She starts, but is unable to object. Didn’t have the energy for that. “…okay, coming.” She gets up and opens the door. She was expecting the RED scout, but no, it was the BLU scout. 

“Oh. It’s you.” She looks away. “What do you want?” 

“I- uhm, just wanted to ask… would you be okay with hanging out, uh, y’know, like after the match..?” She asked, looking around and scratching her neck nervously.

“You think I’m going to hang out with a BLU bastard that has done nothing but annoy me and kill me and- KISS me! And… confuse me…” she starts. “…Bloody hell, scout. What do you think?” 

Scout’s face went from nervous to devastated. And very ..? Red. Why the hell is he red?

“Oh.” She looked down, pulling her hat to cover her face. “Okay,” she choked out. “I’ll be going, then.” She ran off, and sniper could have sworn that she heard scout crying.

Fuck. I’m such an asshole. She walked out. “Scout?” She called. “Scout-“ she stopped. This is the enemy. The one I fight every day. “-please come back.” 

In the distance, the running stopped. The sand that was causing a cloud of dust under her feet settled. Scout looked back and nodded, wiping off a tear. Sniper ran a bit further to keep talking. 

“I’m sorry, scout, I’ve been an asshole, okay? I’ll- I’ll see you tonight.” She may have had dust in her eyes, but thought she saw scout smiling. 

————

The round started and ended quickly. Sniper got some kills, mind clearer and in a way, excited. Why am I excited to see my enemy? She asked herself.

Scout was distracted. She kept looking off into the distance. The flowers were nice, the water was calming, the sky was blue, the trees were pretty. She picked a few of the flowers, arranging them in a bouquet.

————

Scout walked out, squeezing the bouquet of flowers tightly in her hand. Nobody had bothered to ask why she had flowers. Nobody ever asked scout anything. She reached sniper’s door but hesitated to knock. What if he changed his mind? This is such a bad idea. Why did I bring the flowers?! God I’m so stupid, fuck! 

She knocked on the door. Face pink, maybe red, jittery, tapping her foot, waiting for a response. 

The door opened and sniper, hair down, hat off, no vest, nothing. Okay, not nothing, she had her shirt on but god she was hot. Scout’s face was definitely red now. 

“Uh- hi- uh- hey sniper.” She looked away, a flustered smile on her face, bouquet behind her back.

————

Oh god. Scout was so cute. Her eyes widened and she straightened up.

“Uh- hey, scout. Come on in.” BLU scout. Enemy. Bad. How can I keep this up?! Am I really becoming friends with this dumbass?!

And suddenly, scout pulled out a bouquet of flowers. 

Oh my god.

Sniper’s face turned red, and she started playing with the hem of her shirt. “Eh- uh. Bh- wh- huh- what?” She muttered inconceivably. “T-thank you..?” She took the bouquet and walked over to her table, setting them down. “Do you… uhm, wanna go on the roof?” She asks, reaching out her hand. 

Scout took the hand and brought her inside. She pulled down a ladder and climbed up, scout just behind.

“The stars are nice out here.” Scout said. “I’ve never been on this side before.” Sniper scooted a bit closer. “Sorry for being so rude yesterday, mate… it was nice of you to, y’know, wait for me.” Scout smiled softly. She leaned her head on sniper’s shoulder, and sniper does the same.

“Snipes?” 

“Yeah?”

“What if someone finds us?”

“… we die together, I s’pose.” 

…

“Can I sleep here?” She asks, and sniper doesn’t have an answer.

“You’d have to sleep on the floor, mate.” 

“I don’t mind. Used to do that before I lived here anyways, heh.” 

…

“When’d you pick those flowers?”

“I- got distracted during the fight. Hard to focus when I’m thinking about you.”

“Think that’s just the ADHD.”

“Maybe, but like, when you have your hair down you’re so pretty, you look like a girl. I like girls.”

“Like or love..?”

“Love. I mean, like, they’re so beautiful, man! I dunno what it is, but like they’re so hot and cool and like, you know.”

“…sure.” 

“What, you gay?”

“Ew! No! I’d- never. That’d be crazy, I don’t- I’m not.” 

“Dude, what’s you got against guys?” He chuckled, nudging her.

“Just don’t like ‘em.” She huffed, looking away. “I’m going to bed.” She climbed down. 

She grabbed her clothes, going over to the bathroom to change. How do I make him not see my chest or my binder… she thought, shifting. Can’t just wear it overnight, it’s too tight for that… ugh.

She came out, deciding not to to wear the binder and instead just get into the blankets really fast. Scout wasn’t observant enough for that anyways. She cuddled up in her blankets, falling asleep quickly knowing scout was there.

————

Scout couldn’t go to sleep. The floor was cold, the extra blanket was thin, and it was too uncomfortable and everything felt weird. She shifted around, not able to stay asleep. She considered waking up sniper and asking for another blanket, but she couldn’t be bothered. Instead, she decided to stand up and get into bed with sniper.

————

When sniper woke up, she felt warm and cozy, nothing like the awkward night before. When she turned to her side to get up, she realized why it was so warm.

The BLU scout was in her bed.

“…Scout?” She poked her head up. 

“…wha?” Scout said, rubbing her eyes and pushing herself up.

“Why are you in my bed, scout?” She asks, running her fingers through her own hair.

“I was cold…” she mumbled.

“You gotta go back ya base. People are gonna ask where you’re at.”

“Probably not. Nobody cares back there, so I doubt they’d notice if I stayed with you just a bit longer.”

“Ah, well, they’ll notice if I’m gone. So… go back to your base, mate.” She responded, sitting up fully.

“Okay… can I have a kiss..?” She smiled. 

“Uh.” She stared at her. “I’ve gotta get breakfast.” She gets out of bed, stretching. Scout nodded and left the van sleepily.

Finally, someone’s nice to me. He’s great… I can’t wait to see him again before the round. She smiled, grabbing her outfit and changing.

When sniper reached the base, she was smiling for once. 

“Ah, mein freund, what’s got you so joyous?” Medic chuckled as sniper sat down. “Gott Im himmel, haven’t seen you so happy since you first joined.”

“Ah, just… had a good night’s rest,” she… half lied, leaning back and scratching her neck. 

“Just two night’s ago, you were passed out from drinking a whole bottle of vodka, bushman. No way a ‘good night's rest’ is enough to change you up so fast.” Spy replied from across the table.

“No need to analyze my feelings, I can just be happy.” Spy looked unimpressed by that response.

“Sniper, a few days ago you were having a mental breakdown. I don’t think even anti-depressants can just do that.”

“Zhey’re home-made, zhey might!” Medic corrected, and spy wasn’t happy with that response either, grumbling in response.

“Whatever, that argument doesn’t work because you were hammered a few nights ago.”

“It was a bad loss and soldier yelled at me. This is an annoying conversation anyways! Bloody hell, just let me eat my breakfast.”

The big gay one also had something to say, apparently. “I like it. It fits you.” He smiles back. She looks away.

 —————

Sniper finished up breakfast very fast, making the excuse of ‘practice since they lost last round’ and ‘needing extra time’. She ran to the BLU spawn, waiting for scout.

She sat there for longer than she’d liked, starting to get a bit concerned that scout wasn’t okay. But she showed up, and the two kissed, wrapping themselves up in eachother’s arms.

“Oh, I missed you, snipes! Soldier held me back asking where I was, so I told ‘em I was out trainin’ cus I got distracted last time.” She laughed with sniper, and the two talked (mostly scout) and listened (mostly sniper) to each other, in a room near the middle of the map, off to the side so nobody saw the two giggling like school kids.

————

When the round had almost started, scout picked her up and lugged her over, startling her, and rolled her down the hill to where her spawn was, not without giving her a quick kiss, surprising her again. 

She ran back, and nobody exactly cared, other than engie looming over his papers a bit further and spy giving her a stern look.

She slumped down, and her mind wandered thinking back to the night she drew sniper and the night previous where they cuddled up next to each other. She finally had what she wanted. A lover. Or at least a friend. She couldn’t completely tell which one it was.

The match went well. Sniper ended up scoring better, in fact sabotaging her own team to keep her alive. Thankfully that didn’t show up on the leaderboard. Scout did too, since she’d probably be lectured by the soldier about how the ‘training did nothing’ and banning her from ever going outside again or something.

When the round ended, the announcer called out, “BLU Scout, please come to my room after dinner.” She froze. 

I’m dead. I’m so dead. 

She exchanged glances with the RED sniper, concern on both of their faces. 

Is this about me and him or being a woman..?

She shakily turned around and went through spawn to the cafeteria. It was her night to cook anyways. She’d decided to make Mac n’ cheese, seeing as it was the only thing she could make without setting the kitchen on fire.

She served the Mac n’ cheese to her teammates, trying not to freak out. She was surely just called because she was getting a new weapon. That had to be it, because there was no way anyone would know she was a girl and nobody cared for her enough to wonder about last night.

That had to be it. 

She ate her food, thoughts whirring in her head. Despite that, she still finished her food. And she still had to see the administrator.

She put her plate away and started walking through the halls to the administrator’s surveillance room. 

“Uh- hey, how’s it… how’s it goin..?” 

“Scout.” She stiffened up.

“You have been missing your appointments.” She looked around the room.

“I’ve been- been busy, y’know, like, training, n’ stuff.”

“Jeremy, I’m not falling for that. What are you actually doing?”

“I’ve just been lonely, man.”

“Then go see medic.”

“Ludwig is scary.”

She doesn’t respond. 

“…may I go?” The administrator nodded in response, puffing a bit of smoke from her cigarette.

When she got out of the room, she finally breathed out. She was okay. It was all gonna be okay.

She reached the cafeteria again, and BLU was celebrating their win. She couldn’t be bothered to hang out with people who wouldn’t listen, but she knew sniper would listen. She sighed and started leaving, but was held back by Medic grabbing her dog tags. 

“Agh! Wha-who?” She turned to see Medic staring at her ominously.

Chapter Text

“Ve’re going to the examination room. You’ve been here a year now vithout a single  check-up.” He started pulling her by the collar of her shirt.

“Medic! Let me go! C’mon, doc, I’m healthy, man! Lemme go!!” She screeched as she was dragged across the halls.

“Shut up! Zhis behavior is unacceptable!” Medic yelled back and scout stopped resisting, folding her arms as they approached the examination room. He picked her up like a child, setting her down on the chair.

“Your information is safe vith me, so do not be afraid to share.”

“I don’t have anything to share.”

“Zhat’s not true. I am observant. I know zhere’s something going on vith you.”

“Are you sure..?” She squirmed. “ ‘Cos it’s a really big thing, dude.” 

“I swear on all 9 of our zouls!” 

“…er, I guess I dunno how t’say this, but, I’m like, a girl.” He perked up in response.

“Oh. If zhat’s it, zhen you are free to go. I have no business vith zhat. I von’t tell zhe administrator, don’t vorry.”

She slowly stood up and left, fidgeting with her shirt. No way it was that easy. He did swear on all their souls. Whatever. That’s a later problem.

She walked through the halls again, trying not to look at her teammates. Not like they’d care.

She exited BLU’s base and started walking back over to sniper’s van. She knocked at the door, waiting patiently for a response.

Sniper opened the door, a smile on her face for once. 

“What, are you actually happy to see me?” She chuckled, and sniper blushed.

“Wh-no! I- maybe. Just get in here, ya bugger.”

She stepped inside, sitting down on the floor next to her. “So… what happened with the whole getting drunk n’ passin’ out thing?”

“I-“ she looked off into the distance.

“Snipes?”

“…Just, just soldier.” She brushed it off.

“Dude, I know soldier sucks, but you don’t just drink yourself to half to death because he yelled at you.”

“Okay, look, roo, I’ve just been havin’ a hard time, ya know, with ya kissin’ me and all ‘em expectations. But soldier yellin’ at me was a part o’ it.”

She fidgeted with her dog tags. “…sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, love.” She laid her head on scout’s shoulder. Scout’s muscles loosened. She smiled back.

…

“You’re so pretty, snipes.” She leaned in. Sniper stared, stunned.

“I- no… that’s not true.” She blushed, looking away.

“It is, really, you’re like, beautiful, I swear. Best dude I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen dudes. They suck usually, but you, man, you’re amazing!”

“You- you’re just saying that! Mate, I’m not all that.”

“I dunno… you like, listen to me, you got pretty hair, a pretty face, n’ you’re just so great, man! I like you, dude.”

“…mhm.”

————

She didn’t know how much time passed. What she did know was that she was asleep in sniper’s lap when she woke up. 

Sniper was still asleep, and scout couldn’t just get up and leave. But, it was getting sunny out…

She’d made a decision, she’d get up gently and make sure not to wake him up. That’d probably work.

She carefully slipped out of his grip and slowly opened the door, careful not to make too much noise.

Sniper stayed sleeping peacefully, head resting on the side of the bed. She smiled and closed the door behind her, skidding off into the soft sand.

—————

Sniper woke up, sun- and a very obnoxious knock at the door- pounding in her head. She went to tell scout to get off, but he was already gone. She sat stunned for a few seconds but she knew she had to get up because of the knocking.

“What..? Who is it?” She asked. She was still a bit offended that scout left. She didn’t know why. He’s got places to be. 

“It’s soldier, maggot!!” She groaned and got up. 

“Bloody hell ya want, solly?” She asked, opening the door, not only to see soldier, but medic as well. “Why are you here, medic?”

“In case you vere dead, of course!” He responded, and sniper responded with a blank stare.

“What time is it that you thought I was dead?” 

“It’s 10, Aussie! Get moving! We have round one in 15 minutes, sister!” She flinched at soldier’s screech.

“God! Why didn’t ya tell me earlier?!” She slammed the door on them, rushing to grab her vest, hat, throwing it on. She rushed out the door, footprints on the sand. 3 sets of footprints on the sand.

Why didn’t scout wake me up..?

She reached the base, not bothering to eat, rushing past the very empty halls, to the now packed respawn room. Engie looked up. “Ah, mick! There ya are! I was worried sick!” He exclaimed. 

“Ah, hey, engie. Sorry for being so late, mate.” She looked away from him, scratching her neck. “I- gotta get goin’, sorry.” She paused, realizing he’d ask about what she was doing. “I’ve gotta get warm-ups in. Wanted to try the huntsman today.” 

She ran off, running until she saw a BLU curdled up inside where she’d usually be going up the stairs to her nest. Scruffy hair, black hat, hyperventilating, fidgeting… it was scout.

“Y’alright, love?” She whispered, tapping him on the shoulder. He looked up, and when he noticed her, his tear stained eyes glowed up.

“Snipes!” He exclaimed. “Oh god, you’re alright! I thought you died, I tried knocking on your door n’ you didn’t answer but I had to go cause I knew people’d start looking for me- and, oh, I got brought up to do a medical check-up cause I kept missin’ ‘em, and I got totally freaked out! My medic’s like, crazy, man! You should see ‘im up close, he’s freaky, dude! Looks like he’d kill me if I looked at ‘Im wrong, and he like- dragged me through the hallway and scared the hell outta me! Oh, I’m just so glad you’re okay!” He blabbered, getting up and hugging her. She smiled, though not a huge fan of touching.

“M’ alright mate. Calm down. Breathe.” She let go, setting a hand on the side of his face and kissing him gently. She knew scout liked it. She was… iffy. They’re friends. That’s all. Just… just comforting him. “C’mon. Round’ll start soon.” She ran her fingers through his short hair. “Good luck, roo.” She ran back to the respawn before the round started, watching as scout did the same.

The door closed behind her, making her jump for a second. Engie looks up and smiles at her, patting the seat next to him. “Howdy, partner.” 

“Oh, hey, mate.” She sat down next to him, rifle at her side. She absentmindedly picked at the wood when engie wasn’t talking. 

“Y’feelin’ better since-“

Her mood shifted immediately. “Don’t.” She cut him off, ripping off a small chunk of wood. “I’m fine.” She feigned a smile.

The announcer started counting down and she grabbed her rifle, positioning herself at the door. She was still offput by engie’s comment. 

“Go!” The announcer called, but sniper took longer than everyone else, mistakenly sitting back for a few moments, barely processing reality. Is she better? Had scout’s … very upfront … friendship helped or not? Was she still just pushing her emotions back?

She snapped out if it, running out to the field. She reached the top of the tower, legs tired from running up the stairs. She sat on top of a box and watched from her window, shooting anyone who got in her sightline. She carefully avoided scout, though it was a bit difficult from so far away.

She saw him run towards her tower, and she put down her rifle and listened to his footsteps. “Scout?” She called. “Bloody hell, get back to the field.” Sniper turned around.

“No!” He screeched back. “I wanna see you!” He reached the top of the steps.

“You’re actin’ like a kid, mate. You’ll live one round without me.” She responded, getting up and putting her hat back on.

“I’m like 27, not a kid. What, I’m not allowed to like a guy?” He responded, chuckling a bit.

“Yeah. There is. You’d be gay.” She snarled. “And gay people are the worst.” She got closer, making him back up.

“I- no, not, uhm, in a gay way, uh, guys’re cool, but like I’d, I’d uhm, shit.” He stuttered through his words. “I- like, them, in- in a normal way. M’normal.” He paused. “Gay people aren’t- like, that bad, it’s just like a girl n’ a guy, it’s… uhm.” He turned around and ran down the stairs. “Okay, that’s enough, bye love you! Wait- shit.” The voice faded out as he got further down.

“F****t.” She grumbled under her breath. “He’ll stop likin’ me when I tell ‘im.” She told herself. She set herself back up, looking back out the window through her scope.

The round went on without a problem. She got kills, scout got kills, all was well. Other than scout running up and talking to her for no reason. She ponded the moment and questioned if she actually heard him say “I love you” or if she was imagining things.