Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 1 - Jesus is Back

Hi, it's me, Jesus. Yes, that Jesus. A lot of shit has gone down since I last visited the earth. And let me tell you, my dad was not happy with my “woke propaganda” I was spreading last time I was here. But he has been busy with whatever, so I decided to make a comeback.

Last time was a little crazy, this time I’ll try to keep it a little more lowkey. It was fun for sure, but the whole “dying for your sins” thing was a bit over the top. I feel like it was kinda self absorbed, just leaving all my friends and people behind.

I want to go back to helping people, to healing people and to spreading happiness. That's what I'm here for. And that’s what I’ll do.

As I'm wandering around in the forest, I wonder about where to start and who to go to first. A lot must've changed since I was here last. How long has it been… about 1300 years?

Footsteps behind me interrupt my train of thought.
“Sorry, are you sure where you're going?” a cautious voice asks.

I turn around and see an old woman in ragged clothes. She seemed to be in the middle of picking some mushrooms.

“No I- I'm afraid I have never been in these parts before. Do you know these woods well?” I replied. Maybe she can help me find a village or something.

Her eyes darted behind me cautiously, in the direction I was heading towards. “Not too well,” she replies, keeping her voice low,”but a terrible monster lives in that direction. Best to head back, don’t want to test faith.”

I turn my head back to the direction she had warned me about. As I wanted to thank her, she had already continued down a different path.

Standing in place I wondered what to do next. A terrible monster… testing fate… It honestly sounds like a fun time. So I continue down that path.

After walking for a few minutes I start smelling something that reminds me of… onions? Yes, definitely. Curiously I follow the smell and then hidden behind some trees and “keep out” signs I find a lively swamp.

Perched upon a hill right in the middle there is a house, if you can call it that. This couldn't possibly be the place the old lady meant. What kind of monster would live here?

Suddenly I hear something big move behind me, then a loud cry: “What are you doing IN MY SWAMP!?”

I turned around startled. A bright green creature stood before me, looking furious. I must've lost quite a bit of confidence, since all I did was stand there and stare. But I couldn't help it. His eyes were… mesmerizing.

After a few seconds he decided to try again with a loud roar, frightening some birds somewhere in a tree. I didn't flinch, which was not the reaction he was hoping for.

A few seconds passed and he changed his demeanor. Now he looked annoyed. “You're supposed to run?” He stated and then added: “or at least scream.”

At this point I had found my voice again and managed to tear my gaze away from his eyes. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to um… not scream?”

He looked at me baffled. Then it was silent again. I definitely don't remember it being so awkward on earth. Was it usually like this?

“So… you live here?” I ask, breaking the silence.

“Yes I do.” He answers, “and you don't, so leave!”

Then he glares at me again with those gorgeous brown eyes. They remind me of my old days working as a carpenter. Like warm aspen wood. Or maybe they’re closer to mahogany?

As I try to figure it out I notice how crazy I must seem. A stranger, coming to his home with no explanation and just staring at him. How rude.

“Sorry! You have a lovely place here. I'm Jesus.”

He pulls up his eyebrows. “...Christ?” He asks, but it sounds more like a joke, “Okay, cool, hey would you tell your dad that he should send down some more rain, my swamp is drying up.”

I could feel that he was being sarcastic, but I didn’t really know what to say, so I decided on just answering truthfully. “Well, we two aren't really on a talking basis right now. But rain isn't so hard to make.”

He laughed. It'd be a really nice laugh, if it wasn't meant mockingly. “Sure, whenever you're ready, Mr. Christ.”

But without waiting he just walked past me and towards his little house. I watch him close the door behind him, without a second glance.

Okay, rain. I can make rain. It's been a while, but rain shouldn't be too hard. And then hopefully he'll decide that I am worth his time after all.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 2 - First Night

The first drop lands just before my feet. I look up at the grey clouds. This should do it. It took longer than expected, the sun had started to set. But after the first raindrop many more followed.

I realized that I had no place to go and got soaked in no time. I hadn’t really thought this through.

I walked up to the house, seeing more “keep out” signs. I stopped in front of a sign saying “beware of the ogre” with a not too flattering picture of the creature I had seen before underneath it.

Ah, so he was an ogre. I have never met an ogre before. I wonder if more of them existed back in my day.

I knocked at the wooden door once I arrived in front of it. No answer.

I know he's in there, I saw him walk in and I haven't seen him leave. I knock again, louder this time.

Just before I want to knock a third time, the door gets ripped open. There he is again, this ogre, with eyes to get lost in. I point upwards smiling, like a child proudly showing off an artwork.

He stared at me confused and then realized what I was trying to indicate.
“Good try, but sorry to burst your bubble, you didn't make it rain.”

What? Why was this ogre so stubborn?!

“Yes I did, one might even say it's a miracle? You know, because I'm Jesus Christ?” I answer losing my cool for the first time interacting with him.

He looks at me bemused. “Sure, and I am the King of far far away! Haha!”

I- Why won't he believe me? Last time people followed everywhere I went, everyone loved me or wanted my help. I should leave. I should go somewhere I'm appreciated.

But of course, like a complete idiot, I stay and ask: “What can I do to prove it to you?”

I sounded needy. But whatever, I'll help him in the long run, that's all I want.

“How can supposed Jesus Christ prove to me that he's the real deal… How about you make every other person disappear so I can live in peace?” he suggests.

What? This guy is really starting to really get under my skin! “No! Why can't you wish for something normal? Like turning water into wine or a good harvest?”

He looks thoughtful for a moment before answering: “You’re right, that one was a bit much. In that case…" he starts with a smile, "I wish for you to Leave. Me. Alone!”

He shuts the door in my face. I stand there speechless. I have met many difficult personalities, but this ogre ugh!

I think about ending the rain, but the plants really do look a little dry and I don't want to punish them just because of the ogre. Instead I decided to look for a cave to shelter me from the rain.

Luckily there is one not too far away. It's cozy with lots of moss. I sit down, listen to the rain and let my thoughts roam free.

I feel like I should leave. It doesn't make sense to stay here. Clearly the ogre wants nothing to do with me. And I don't care.

I shouldn't care.

Why do I care?

His eyes keep on popping up in my mind. That deep mahogany colour. When I close my eyes I can almost imagine the smell of cutting that wood again.

I stop myself from smiling. So clearly the ogre intrigues me. It isn't surprising, I have a sense for who needs my help, that must be why I feel this pull towards him.

Being more at peace now with my decision on why I can't possibly leave, I rest for a little while. Being back in a human body is more tiring than I remember.

When I wake the rain has stopped and the night has passed. Motivated to get the ogre to pay attention to me, I leave the cave.

As soon as I arrive at the cottage, I hear the ogre letting out an annoyed groan. Perfect, he remembers me.

“Leave, I want to eat my breakfast in peace!” he says, already sounding defeated. As if on command my stomach growls. Right, bodies need food. Maybe he's kind enough to share some.

“We could eat together. What are you having?” I ask as I'm walking closer. I don't see any food. It doesn't look like he was in the middle of eating.

With a sigh he answers: “I'm looking for my breakfast right now, so I don't know what I'm having. And unless you can “miracle” us some food, we're definitely not eating together.”

I can make food. That's like something I'm known for, making wine, bread or fish. With a smug smile I take a piece of moss and close my eyes. I concentrate as I feel the other's eyes on me.

I break the moss in two and as I do so, it turns into bread. I smile to myself, I love doing that trick.

The ogre stands there dumbfounded. I hold out one half of the bread to him and he takes it, still not really processing what just happened. I sit down on a rock beside him and start eating. He joins me, staying quiet and eyeing me suspiciously.

After a few bites he asks, trying to keep his voice casual: “So, what else can you do? I am quite hungry.”

Biting down a smile I answer: “What would you like?”

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 3 - Breakfast

We had a feast. It's good to know that the way to an ogre’s heart is through his stomach.

He's actually talking to me now. I found out that his name was Shrek and that ogres are like onions, whatever that meant.

It's fun. I'm having fun. I still don't know how exactly I can help him, but I can tell that this is exactly where I'm supposed to be.

I think he still doesn't really believe that I'm Jesus, but at least he believes I can do magic, which is close enough I've decided.

“How's the swamp doing? Looks like it appreciated the rain yesterday.” I start, wanting to see if I can get him to accept that I made the rain happen.

His head turns towards the swamp, looking pleased. “Yes, I'm glad.” Then, hesitantly he continues: “Look I'm not saying that it was you, but... thank you, I guess.”

I'll take that as a win! “Any other weather you want?” I challenge him jokingly.

He thinks for a few seconds. “How about a big happy rainbow?” Shrek gives back.

Somehow that's not what I was expecting. I thought he'd go with something crazy. And although a rainbow isn't crazy, surprisingly it's not easy to do.

“Rainbows are sadly off the table.” I informed him.

He dramatically throws his hands in the air and says: “Why are you even here then?”, which makes me laugh.

We hold eye contact for a moment. His eyes are even more beautiful with a playful glint in them. Then something weird happens. His whole demeanor changes from one moment to the next. He looks away, his face displaying the coldness from before. Did I do something wrong?

“Well, thank you for the food, but you should get going.” He says without looking at me, standing up and leaving me on the ground confused. I- What? What happened?

“Shrek what’s wrong?” I ask, also getting up. I mean that was weird, right? It’s as if this whole moment didn’t happen and I imagined it all, if it weren’t for the crumbs still lying on the ground, waiting to be eaten by some random insects.

“You overstayed your welcome. I don’t care if you're the son of god or not, go heal the blind or something, what are you even doing here?” he rambled, not actually wanting an answer.

I didn’t know what to say. Why the sudden change? I thought we were getting on well. I can’t leave. I need to help him. It is fate, I can feel it.

“Please,” I start, “just tell me why?”

No answer.

“Shrek, why! If you really want me to leave then tell me why!”

Finally he looks at me again, but this time with disgust. I don’t know why that stings, but it does.

“If I tell you, do you promise to leave?” Shrek scowls.

“Yes!” I say without hesitation. But honestly I haven’t decided if I’ll keep that promise or not. The advantage of being Jesus is everyone believes your promises. The issue with that is, that I lie quite a lot.

Shrek looks pained, as if he has a hard time formulating what he wanted to say exactly. Then he fixates on a place on the ground, takes a deep breath and says: “I am an ogre, just like I always have been and always will be. I do not need your pity. I just live in my swamp by myself, not bothering anyone who isn’t bothering me.” he glances towards me and then back on the ground. “I don’t know what you’re trying to achieve or why. But it… it confuses me. Look, I know my place in the world. You should know yours too. Leave.”

He doesn’t sound sad, just factual. But this has told me nothing. I know my place. I help. My place is here, I can feel it.

“Shrek please, I'm here to help you!” Why won’t he accept that? This is the only reason I’m here.

He starts getting louder again, saying: “As I said the first time we met, if you want to help me, leave me ALONE!”

No, I can’t. I can not leave him. “I can't help you if-”

“I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO!” He interrupts me.

Why doesn’t he get it? “No, you need me! I have to help you! I can’t leave you, I don’t… I…”

Oh.

Oh.

I don’t want to leave him. He doesn't need me. I need him. But… That's not what I'm here for! I'm here to help people! I help others, that's how it works! So why do I want him to care about me?

Then I do what he had asked. I leave.

This can't be happening, I don't know what to do with these… these thoughts and feelings. I'm Jesus. I am above that. Last time something like this happened- I shake my head, I can’t think about this now.

I don't know where I'm going. I'm just walking, trying to get away.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 4 - Charming

As I walk, I’m trying to not think of anything. No thoughts, just walking.

I make my way out of the forest and land in a small village. It's interesting, since arriving here I haven't seen anything about how the human kind has evolved. Everything's different, the architecture, the clothes and the food.

People keep on staring at me. Do I stand out that much? Maybe I should get some new clothes. No, I don't have money. Well, since Shrek was impressed by my food magic, maybe the people here will also appreciate it and I could earn a few coins that way.

I head to a fountain. There's a few people here and there, some children playing with fake swords and a person sitting at the edge of the fountain looking in.

I get behind them, trying to see what they're looking at. But I see nothing. Nothing but their reflection.

“What are you looking at?” He says, noticing my reflection behin him.

“Ah sorry I was um…” I start. But what was I doing exactly?

I decided to go with the tourist explanation. “Sorry, I'm here for the first time. Do you know where anyone could get a drink around here?”

The man looks me up and down and then answers: “There's a place right around the corner, but I'm afraid it's rather expensive. I'm telling you the taverns around here are far too greedy.”

Well considering I don't have any money, it doesn't matter how expensive it is. But that does mean I could sell some myself. I also need money for food, so that might be a good place to start.

“Want to join me for a drink?” I ask him. It would be good to have someone with me who knows where what was and how things worked around here.

He eyes me for a moment, making me realize what my question could have implied. But then he nods and says: “Charming!”

“I- thank you.” I answer feeling a little flustered.

“No no, that's my name, I’m Prince,” he pauses dramatically, “Charming.” He finishes.

Oh, a prince. “Nice to meet you, I'm Jesus. Just Jesus.”

He squints at me for a moment but then seems to decide that whatever he was thinking wasn't too important. I don't really know if I should be going around introducing myself as Jesus, last time I was on earth that didn't end too well. But then again, this time I won't let myself fall…

I snap back to the present. No time for heavy thoughts.

“So Jesus, your treat?” He asks. Well considering I don't have any money… But there's a well right here, I just need something that holds water.

Thinking of a plan I reply: “How about you go and get some sort of chalice and I will get some wine and we meet back here?”

It was an unusual proposal, but he seemed to be down for it. He hushed away and came back a few minutes later with two goblets.

As he strutted over to me he looked disappointed at the obvious lack of wine. He looked as if he was ready to throw a tantrum, so before he could say anything I take the chalices.

As I hold them under water and fish them out again he exclaims: “That's cheap. You promised me wine!”

“Hushh, close your eyes.” I tell him, more exciting this way.

He does but his face is twisted in a way that makes him look like an angry toddler.

In the blink of an eye, I turn the water into wine. Then I tell him to open his eyes again. As soon as he sees the darkened liquid in the goblets he grabs one and smells it suspiciously. Seeming to decide that he could only be sure what it was after tasting some, he held it up to his lips and poured some into his mouth.

“It's… it's wine!” He exclaims in disbelief.

I drink some myself. Not bad, all these years later, and I've still got it in me.

Prince Charming eyes me like I'm a riddle he can solve and then decides on a conclusion: “So you go around pretending to be Jesus? I guess I can see the appeal behind that. But this… this trick! I mean you must teach me how it works.”

Once again I found myself noticing that I hadn't thought this through. What now? What exactly was my plan?

Stay away from Shrek, that was the plan. Firstly it was what he had wished for multiple times and secondly knowing what I know now, it'd be a stupid mistake interacting with him.

I mean why would I even want to interact with him? I don't.

Realizing that I have just been standing there, lost in thought I also notice that Charming has just gone back to staring at his reflection. Good for him I guess.

“Do you know the ogre in the forest?” I catch myself saying, as he seems to be the main thing on my mind.

The prince stops and looks back at me with a sour look. “Ugh, the ogre. I know of it, but luckily I haven't had the displeasure of meeting it.” He sneers.

Hm, I mean Shrek wasn't too polite, but that's a bit harsh. What happened to love thy neighbor?

“This ogre I tell you,” he continues, “he's rude, he's arrogant, he eats literal babies. We keep on trying to get rid of it, but everyone's too scared.”

That can't be true? Has anyone ever met or talked to Shrek?

But Charming goes on: “Of course I would do it. But ugh, I just really don't want my boots to get dirty in the swamp. They are far too expensive for that.”

I looked down at his shoes, which didn't look that fancy to be honest. Then I looked at his face, to make sure he was serious. He seemed to be.

The people walking past us also threw cautious glances our way, as if talking about Shrek itself was somehow taboo or dangerous.

I didn't quite understand why. Was there maybe a second ogre in the woods? I mean I don't know Shrek well at all, but I'm pretty good at reading others. And I could tell that that was all… well, wrong.

“Is there more than one ogre?”

He looks at me as if I made a joke and replies: “Hah, imagine. No, certainly not, one is more than enough.”

Part of my worried for Shrek. Was this how the people saw him? Just some monster. He told me he knew his place, but I think he's wrong about where or who that is.

My dad has done a lot of fucked up things, but all of his creatures deserve to be accepted and loved. So why not him?

I feel my heart ache. I wonder if that's why he said those things. Me repeating that I wanted to help him with no other input probably didn't make things better either. I should've realized earlier.

“I um… I have to go,” I start, “but it was nice meeting you.”

Charming looks at me, then rolls his eyes. “Sure, whatever. I was about to leave as well actually. A prince shouldn't be around someone of your standard too long.”

He then takes the goblets, mine still half full, and leaves. That was… rude. This guy certainly had quite the personality.

With my mind still mainly on Shrek, my body carries me back to the forest. I decide to stop off at the cave first. This time I don't want to go in without a plan.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 5 - Knock Knock

I sit back on the moss, where I had been merely a day before. Then I take a deep breath and start sorting my thoughts.

After a while I establish three main points.
Firstly, the village people dislike ogres.
Secondly, Shrek himself seems to think ogres are bad.
And lastly, for some reason, I really really like him.

The first two I could manage, but the last one was an issue. I guess it makes sense with the way I acted. But I know exactly why I tried so hard to ignore it.

I have never loved again. Not since… Judas. I couldn't. I… I really loved him.

Thinking back to that moment hurts. I saw it coming. Of course I did. I had really hoped that I might be wrong.

But I wasn't.

Last time I fell in love, not only did I get betrayed by the person I cared most about, it was also what caused my death. I can't let that happen again.

But I guess… times were different then. And I did know it was going to happen, even if I didn’t want to admit it to myself.

Shrek was… different. Judas followed me blindly, as did a lot of people back then. It was nice, but I could also never really be sure what people really thought of me or if they cared about me. Me as a person, not just as God’s son.

Shrek is more guarded and skeptical. I mean, he’s seen me turn moss into bread and still wouldn’t really believe me. And he sent me away.

I hope it’s okay to let myself fall.

The thought of bread makes my stomach rumble. I decide to eat something and sleep in this cave again, it’s surprisingly cozy. And then tomorrow I’ll go back to Shrek and hope he will hear me out. Maybe I could make him breakfast again.

So that’s exactly what I do. I get up just as the sun rises and collect some things to turn into breakfast. Wondering if my miracles still count as “giving to others” when I use this power for my own desire so blatantly. Eh it's fine. I've always been so focused on doing things for others, this time around I want to do things for myself.

I sneak over to the cottage, hoping that Shrek was still inside. When arriving in front of his door, food in my hand, I knock.

I notice myself shaking slightly. Deep breath. I've done scarier things before. There's no reason to be so on edge.

Then the door opens and Shrek rolls his eyes as soon as he sees me. “You didn't even manage to stay away for a single day??”

“Sorry, I- um I got you some breakfast.” I say, making it sound more like a question than a statement.

He looks down at the food and then back at me. Then he tells me slowly and clearly: “As I keep telling you, I do not need your help!”

He's about to shut the door in my face, but stops when I hurry: “That's not why I'm here!”

He waits a few seconds, seeming to ponder if this is worth his time. His curiosity wins and he slowly opens the door again, one eyebrow raised.

Okay Jesus, now stay cool. I'll just explain the situation. I'm good with words, people quote me all the time. You got this.

“I love your eyes!”

Hm. Okay. That was one way of explaining the situation I guess. I mean what else was I supposed to say when that's all I can look at.

So we stand there, my compliment hanging in the air. Shrek still holding the door, I still with food in my hand.

This is kinda awkward.

I can't read his face. What was he thinking? I should probably say something else. What should I say?

But before I can think of anything good he says: “Sure, poop brown, thank you very much.”

There was still no reaction to be seen in his face, but his voice sounded defeated. Did he think I was making fun of him?

“Shrek, that's not- what? Your eyes remind me of nature! Strong wood like mahogany! They are breathtaking!” I insist, sounding as sincere as I can. Although I was laying it on thick, I meant every word.

He closes his eyes and sighs: “Why are you doing this?”

Why am I doing this? Because I want to. Because I hate seeing him being miserable. Because I want him to know that I care.

“Shrek, I really like you.”

That definitely catches him off guard, but even then he manages to not show too much emotion on his face. He looks at me again, scanning my face, trying to find even the slightest hint of me being insincere. But I'm not. So he can't.

I continue: “Shrek, I'm sorry for how I acted yesterday. Please, let's eat breakfast together and let me explain.”

A few seconds pass and then he lets out an angry groan, presumably because he realized that he's going to say yes anyway.

Then he steps out, closes the door behind him and gestures to the ground where we sat yesterday. We both sit down quietly.

I break the bread in two and hand him one half.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 6 - Second Breakfast

We eat, the mood a lot heavier than yesterday. Neither of us want to be the one to break the tension.

“Sooo…” I finally start. But it stays at that. This book humans wrote about me made me look so brave and cool, I wish that were the case. But I have no idea what I'm doing.

“So… You said something about explaining?" He attempts.

Thankful for his help, I start to piece together what I want to say. “Yes! I am sorry about yesterday. I didn't really know what I was- well actually I did know I just decided to ignore it. Um okay, basically I didn’t realize that I um…”

Well this is a shit show. And I thought my first visit on earth went badly. I take a deep breath and finish what I want to say: “I hadn't realized that I liked you. A lot. I misinterpreted why I cared about you.”

I look at him and he looks at me. His expression once again almost impossible to read. But this time he seemed to look the tiniest bit scared.

He clears his throat. “Okay, so, supposed Jesus Christ is visiting me to help me, but then leaves and comes back confessing his love?” Shrek says, cringing at how absurd it sounds.

It might sound absurd, but it's true, even if love was a strong word.

“Look, I don’t care if you believe me about who I used to be or where I came from. All I care about is that you believe who I am right now. Just a person who really likes you.” I reply.

He looks at me, doubt in his eyes. He seems to have a hard time believing it. But luckily I'm quite stubborn and won't give up.

After a few seconds he simply asks: “Why?” barely audible.

“Why what?” I ask in return.

And just as quietly as before he elaborates: “Why do you like me?”

Oh. I see… His tone wasn't flirty or curious. He sounded hopeless. As if the mere thought of liking him seemed impossible.

But contrary to the gloomy look on his face, a smile started to grow on mine. Why do I like Shrek? Now that was something I could really talk about.

I face him directly and with a new found boldness, as I ponder about where to start.

“Well, I already told you that I like your mahogany coloured eyes. I like how they shimmer gold, when the evening sun shines its rays on them. I like how your dark lashes frame them so delicately. I like your bright green skin, it's exciting yet feels so familiar, reminding me of nature. I like your smile, although I haven't been able to see it much yet. But it's so contagious and I can't help but to feel happy when seeing it. I like your swamp and how much you care for it. I like talking with you when you don't have your guard up. You're funny and really thoughtful. It's so easy to talk to you and feel at ease. And then of course I like-”

I stop. Shrek looks uncomfortable and kind of overwhelmed. Maybe that was a bit much?

“Everything okay?” I ask cautiously.

It takes him a few seconds to sort himself and react to my question. But then he clears his throat and decides on: “I- I don't understand. You don't even know me.”

“Not yet, but I'd love to get to know you.” I answer with hope.

Again he waits a few seconds, letting my answer hang in the air. At this point we have finished our food. Or rather we have both stopped eating.

Shrek lies down on his back. I do the same, not really knowing why or what he’s doing exactly. But sure, lying on the grass seems comfortable I guess. It’s not as if my heart feels like it’s exploding from how fast it’s beating or anything. Who cares that I’m opening up, talking about my feelings and sharing my most vulnerable thoughts. I guess we’ll just lie here and stare at the clouds or something.

“Sorry for being so distrusting.” he finally gives in.

I look over to him, his gaze fixed on a cloud in the sky. I softly reply: “It’s all right. I think it’s a good quality to have. Better than to just blindly trust.

He can tell that there’s something behind what I just said. He looks at me with a question in his eyes.

“You might’ve heard of Judas? Judas Iscariot…” I sigh, “I don’t really want to talk about him right now. I’ll tell you about it another time.”

Shrek nods, not pushing further. It’s also the first time he didn’t question me being Jesus, but just took the mention of Judas as it was. That makes me feel at ease.

Then we just lie there in silence. But for some reason it doesn’t feel awkward. It’s quiet, but a silence that doesn’t feel empty.

We watch the clouds pass over us, hear birds singing in the trees, feel the wind blowing past above us, hear the occasional frog jumping around in the swamp.

It feels vulnerable lying here with Shrek and doing nothing, but in a nice and peaceful way.

I don’t know how much time has passed, when Shrek decides to break the silence.

“Do you think a miracle could turn an ogre into a human?”

I sit up abruptly. What?

“Shrek…” I look at him caught off guard. I don’t know what to say. This question was breaking my heart. He looks at me as well, so much emotion and turmoil behind his eyes.

I take a moment to work out what I’m going to say exactly. I could tell this was a very loaded question and it must’ve taken a lot of courage to actually ask. And at the same time I hated that he even had that thought. I wish he could see what I see.

I reach out my hand to put it on his, hesitating before we make contact just so that he could pull away if he wanted to. He doesn't. My heart flutters softly.

“Shrek, I’m so sorry that’s something you’re contemplating. Everything about you is so wonderful, I wish you could see that as well… Look, there’s things you can change and things you can’t. I can’t change someone into a human, but even if, you’d still be you, no matter what you’d look like. And that’s something you should be happy about. I’m happy that you are you. And there’s always going to be others that love you for you. Above all, you should love yourself for you.”

He closes his eyes, thinking about my words.

“Well, others don’t tend to be too fond of me…” he admits in a sad tone.

“Then give them a chance. Give yourself a chance.” I reply simply. Shrek is guarded, which is safe, but love isn’t safe. It’s messy and unpredictable. But it’s also vital to have any type of love in your life.

He looks at me, eyes still full of raw emotions, most likely mine are too. Then he turns his hand beneath mine around, to softly grab it.

“I’ll try.” he promises.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 7 - Beautiful

Somebody once told me, the world was going to roll me, or rather kill me. That was true the first time around. But honestly, it was all worth it, for the love I got to feel and also the love I get to feel now.

I can't stay here forever, I know that. Every second I spend with Shrek is a gift, and I couldn't be more grateful for my time with him.

It’s been a few days now. He’s smiling so much now. I am too. We talk a lot and we laugh a lot. He's wonderful.

Sigh, I guess… I love him.

“-and she said hey now, you’re an all star- Um, are you listening?” Shrek stops in the middle of what he was saying.

Whoops. I was indeed not listening. Well I was listening to his voice and watching his lips move and his eyes sparkle in the soft evening sun. But listening to the story he was telling, nope.

“Ah, sorry no, I um… I kinda got lost in thought…” I admit sheepishly.

Shrek just smiles. I smile back. “What were you thinking about?” he asks, deeming the story he was telling less interesting.

I turn red. What was I thinking about? I can’t tell him that I am just absolutely falling more and more in love with him, with every second I spend with him. I clear my throat and look away, trying to overplay my red face and sudden flusteredness. Then I decide on a very convincing: “Oh you know, the weather. It’s nice weather we’re having!”

As if to prove my point I look at the blue horizon. It was raining heavily a few hours ago, but now you can hardly tell, except for a few soft clouds scattered across the sky.

Deciding to not push any further, he continues with the topic of the weather.

“I guess it is… But, talking about the weather, I was wondering, how exactly does one make a rainbow?” Shrek asks, looking at me with a curious glint in his eyes.

While contemplating my next move, I hold his gaze. I’d know a pretty easy way to make a rainbow right now. But no, I can’t.

Or should I?

As I stare into his intense eyes I decide that I’ll do it. I want to.

I inch closer to him, still holding his gaze, the air around us electrifying. “Want me to show you?” I ask, barely a whisper.

Shrek, looking pensive, nods his head ever so slightly, cautious of the sudden change in tension.

I move my face closer to his, my gaze darting back and forth between his stunning eyes and his lips. Everything is happening really slowly, both because I want to make sure he's okay with what's about to happen and because I want to enjoy this moment as much as possible.

I reach out my hand, softly touching his cheek. His skin is surprisingly warm, and the contact sends a shiver through my arm.

As soon as he closes his eyes and moves closer too, I take that sign to fully close the gap between us.

Our lips meet and I can feel a surge of energy running through my body. His lips pressed against mine, his cheek under my hand. For a second neither of us move, just taking in the feeling of being this close to each other.

Then he puts his hand on the back of my head, his fingers threading through my hair. I part my lips slightly, an invitation he accepts instantly.

Everything feels warm and fuzzy, as we make out. With great effort I pull away first, not wanting to miss the little miracle. While I’m still in a daze, trying to immortalize this memory, I feel him shift in surprise.

I open my eyes too, a soft smile on my face. Shrek is looking up at the sky. I follow his gaze and see it for myself. A beautiful rainbow.

Most people believe that rainbows happen, when the sun rays interact with rain drops. But that's actually just propaganda. It's a lot more complicated than that. Luckily for me, it's a bit easier to do because of the whole miracle thing, and also I know how to make one.

I look back at Shrek, his eyes still fixated on the rainbow. He looks in awe, with his cheeks still tinted red.

I reach out to hold his hand. Our fingers intertwine.

So we sit there. Hand in hand, watching the rainbow slowly fade away.

The evening turns into night, the moon looking down on us. I’m feeling so many emotions, but sitting here with Shrek, I feel peaceful. I feel safe.

It’s gotten quite cold. I think Shrek is shivering beside me, but it’s hard to tell, since I am also shivering. But I don’t want to get up. I don’t want this moment to end.

“Jesus…” he whispers, keeping his eyes focused on the moon. But it seems that he changes his mind with what he wanted to say, because he doesn’t continue. It just goes back to being quiet.

Which sends me spiraling. What was he going to say? Part of me hopes he wanted to say ‘I love you’, but another part talks me out of it. I’ve probably just been thinking about how I love him, so my brain automatically assumes that’s what he wanted to say.

I can’t really think straight anymore, I don’t know what makes sense and what doesn’t. I need to calm down. He probably just wanted to say something like we should get up. Or that he’s cold. Or tired. There’s literally so many ways that sentence could’ve ended that make more sense than confessing his love. So why am I so nervous?

“Are you okay?” He asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.

Hm, I guess me just staring at the ground in panic wasn’t normal behavior. Who would’ve thought. And my shivering probably doesn’t help my case.

I look at him. “Yeah sorry, just… zoning out.” I reply, not really convincing him.

“Anyway,” I continue, “what did you want to say before?”

That definitely took the focus off of me. He blushed and looked away and mumbled: “Nothing really.”

Okay, that was suspicious!

My heart starts beating faster. Maybe I was right after all, hoping that he wanted to confess. Right? That would’ve been a weird reaction if he just wanted to say that he’s tired. I try to maintain a neutral look on my face, but fail miserably. I can’t help but smile in excitement.

At this point the hope and anticipation clearly shut out the doubt.

So I decide to say it. I know what I feel. And I really want this.

I softly put my hand on his cheek, turning his head so he’s looking at me. I look into his eyes. His beautiful mahogany coloured eyes, the moon reflecting its cold light onto them.

“Shrek… I love you.”

He looks at me with so much raw emotion, I could never even begin to put in words what his eyes contain at this very moment. It’s beautiful. He’s beautiful.

Then he whispers: “That’s exactly what I was going to say.”

He leans down, to kiss me again, which I return with pleasure.

I realize that I’m not shivering anymore, I’m actually feeling quite warm.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 8 - Out of Time

Turns out, God doesn't like ogres. He told me. My dad found out about my newest visit and he isn't happy.

And as much as I love ignoring my dad, I know that I shouldn't be here. Or at least shouldn't stay. I wouldn't say god has a plan, because let's be honest, he doesn't. But people have destinies. And Shrek is destined to change lives. But that won't work with me here.

I know I have to bring it up at some point. But waking up next to Shrek is something I really don't want to give up.

I tend to wake up a bit before him. Time which I usually use to make breakfast. But for the last few mornings I spent the extra time watching him sleep, like now. He looks so peaceful.

After a while Shrek moves around seeming to wake up. He opens his eyes, only to see me staring at him dreamily.

“Good morning.” I say with a smile.

“Hey.” he replies groggily.

I kiss his nose, and then roll around to get up. Just like the last few mornings we eat breakfast together. It's only been a few days, but everything already feels so familiar.

During the day though, a big thunderstorm comes along. I know why.

As we both sit in the house, looking at the wind howling and the rain hitting the ground in a regular pattern, I think about how to best bring up leaving. But honestly I don’t think there is a good way to do it.

“Shrek…” I start, not really knowing what to say next.

But I don’t have to, because before I can think of anything Shrek sighs. “I know…”

“You know what?” I ask with furrowed eyebrows.

“I’m not stupid. You’re Jesus and I’m an ogre. It’s too good to be true.” he says quietly.

This again? I thought we went over that. “Shrek, I love you!” I retort, looking at him determined. He looks at me too, with a loving smile and puts his hand on my cheek.

“I know. I love you too.” he starts, “But it was always going to end this way. I have my life and you have… well, heaven. This wasn’t going to be forever.”

Why is he the one explaining it to me? I thought this was going to be a complete shock and break his heart. But he’s being so… factual. I feel like that’s something he has come to terms with a while ago. I don’t know if I have.

“I’m sorry.” is the only thing I get out, my eyes filling with tears I try to blink away. Shrek just wordlessly puts his arm around me and pulls me in a comforting hug. He really does give the best hugs. We stay like this for a while, with the steady sound of rain splattering outside.

“Thank you,” Shrek whispers, still hugging me, “for visiting me. I… I learnt so much from you.”

I can’t take this. I wish he knew exactly what I was feeling. I wish he knew how thankful I was for him. I wish he knew how much he taught me. I wish he knew how much I love him.

I pull away from his hug, to plant a kiss on his lips, pouring all of my love and emotions into it.

Then, as I lose myself in the kiss I think, maybe he does know.

Chapter Text

Mahogany Eyes

Chapter 9 - Last Breakfast

We spend the rest of the day glued to each other. We decide that we're going to eat breakfast together tomorrow morning and that I’ll leave after that. It makes me sad to think about. But it is nice knowing that we have something that makes leaving so hard. It's crazy, I feel so heavy with sadness, but at the same time like the happiest person on earth.

Tomorrow comes a lot faster than I wanted it to. We end up eating breakfast way past lunch time, making the most of the time we still have. Sadly we can’t eat outside this time, due to the storm still raging on. I think it will stop once I leave, but at the moment it just reminds me of that whole Noah’s ark thing. My dad is so dramatic.

Looking away from the window, I help Shrek get everything ready. This time we decided to cook breakfast, instead of creating it through a miracle. The main reason being that it takes longer, so we have more time together.
It’s interesting trying to find foods we both like. Ogres seem to have a very different taste palette than humans. But the main thing we both like is bread, so we made lots of it. And it’s also kind of my thing. We have very different toppings and sides though.

And just like the first time, we have a feast. And I’m having fun. I can tell he is having fun too.

Then the time comes. Even with eating as slow as we had, our meal comes to an end. This is it.

We talked about this already, the whole how do I leave topic. The first time I kind of left by dying, which I’m not keen on repeating, and the second time I just kind of floated into the sky. But it’s raining and I’ve got to be honest, it was kind of awkward last time. Everyone was just watching me disappear and I was just sort of floating aimlessly, hoping not to crash into a bird or something.

Whatever, this time my idea is to sort of just become one with the ground and the moss. I feel like that might also be awkward, but hey it’s new and peaceful, so why not.

We make our way outside, the rain falling down on us. But the weather doesn’t seem angry. It just sort of… is.

We look at each other, so many things to be said, but no way to express the weight of it all.

“Jesus…” he starts, it takes him a while to formulate what to say. “Thank you, for everything.”

He looks at me, and just like on my first day I can’t help but be mesmerized by his eyes. But this time they are so full of love.

I put my hand on his cheek, caressing it with my thumb. Then I lean in and press a kiss to his lips. Soft and sweet.

“I love you.” I say, after pulling away.

“I love you too.” He replies.

After holding him for what seems like forever, but still not long enough, I pull my hand away. I then lie down on the muddy ground, my head feeling light from knowing what comes next.

I feel myself get overgrown and my mind dissolving. It’s a nice feeling. Final, but happy. I hope it looks as peaceful as it feels.

At breakfast I told Shrek to be more open to making new friends, but since scaring the villagers is one of his main hobbies I doubt that he’s going to take my advice. That’s okay though, I know that he will find his way. And that he’s destined for greatness.

I can’t wait to see you thrive, my love.