Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The light in the room was almost too strong, too overwhelming. Lucy blinked rapidly, forcing her eyes to stay open despite everything. She moved her fingers, lightly grasping some cables. She scanned the room: a hospital room. Her body coming back to life—so did the pain: chilling, ever-present. And then suddenly, a question, a wave of panic: What was she doing there? Why was she lying in a hospital bed?

“Lucy?”

She turned her head slightly to the left. Lucy opened her mouth to speak, but only silence followed. Paralyzed, her lips stayed sealed, but her eyes watched. Her breathing quickened, her chest rising faster and faster, a knot forming in her throat. Who was this man standing beside her bed? Who was this man who knew her name while she knew nothing of him? She studied him, thoroughly, head to toe.

“Who... who are you?” she finally managed to say.

“Lucy, it’s me, Tim...”

“I…”

And then the emptiness took over. Tim, she didn’t know any Tim. And yet he knew her name. And yet he stood beside her, his face etched with anxiety, haggard, as if sleep had long stopped being an option. And no matter how hard she tried, how much she thought, this man was a stranger. And yet he seemed to know her.

“I... I don’t remember… I don’t know who… I…”

Lucy felt like she had just stabbed him in the heart.

His expression shifted, his eyes now glossed over with a thin film of tears, fighting with everything he had not to let anything show, not to break down, not to scare her. But the truth was clear: Lucy had forgotten. Forgotten as if he had never existed, as if everything they had built together had been a dream, an illusion. As if all the battles they had fought to find each other had meant nothing.

Lucy turned her gaze to the ceiling. Her eyes closed quickly, only to reopen under the weight of tears and confusion. Everything felt wrong, unreal, incomprehensible—and yet so painful. She tried to remember, to recall what she had been doing before waking up in that hospital bed. But nothing. Nothing at all.

And Tim watched her, still, silent. His heart in pieces from being powerless. Seeing her cry, seeing her lost, it was suffocating. Not being able to hold her was unbearable. He left the room without a word. He didn’t want to break in front of her.

Once outside the room, he leaned against a wall and closed his eyes for a moment.

“Tim?”

He took a deep breath and opened his eyes. In front of him stood their friends, stoic and worried : this family they had built from scratch. His gaze locked with the one person he refused to call his best friend, because grown men don’t have best friends, and then he couldn’t hold back anymore. The tears fell, one by one.

Angela stepped forward, her heart aching, and wrapped him in a hug.

She’d known him for years, had been through countless trials with him, some of the worst, but this was the first time she saw him cry like that, truly lost, broken, devastated.

“She doesn’t know who I am. She’s forgotten me,” he whispered.

“Oh, Tim…”

She tightened her embrace, unable to say anything else. She guided him to the nearby chairs, gently forcing him to sit. Someone handed him a coffee. Tim nodded and stared into the void. He was absent, completely absent. Oscillating between moments when he could no longer hold back his tears, and others where he closed his eyes, trying to forget. He thought the past 48 hours had been the hardest, between the accident, the surgery, the stillness of the body he loved so much, the endless wait to know if she would ever wake up. But the forgetting, he hadn’t prepared for that.

“Mr. Bradford?”

Tim snapped out of it quickly, wiped away a few tears with the back of his hand, stood up, and walked toward the doctor, the others following.

“Dr. Jones, neurologist. I’m handling your wife’s case. May we speak in my office for a few minutes?”

“You can speak in front of them.”

“Very well. Following her awakening, we ran several tests. She mentioned you, not as her husband, but as the man she saw when she woke up, unable to put a name to you, though realizing you knew her. Your wife is suffering from post-traumatic amnesia as a result of her head injury. We’ve determined that her last memory dates back to her first day at the police academy, in the parking lot, locking her car. After that…”

“Is it irreversible?”

“Yes and no. She might recover her memory within hours, days, or weeks. But the longer it takes, the more significant the brain lesions. It’s also possible that she may never recover it.”

“Is there anything I can do?”

“Be present. Talk to her. Stay close. Try to bring back memories daily, with photos, stories, anything that connects to her life, your life together.”

“What about her physical condition?”

“Her physical injuries won’t require more than painkillers and some time. As for the amnesia, I can have the nurses bring you brochures from several rehabilitation centers for...”

“No. Absolutely not. She’s coming home. With me. I’ll take care of her.”

“Sir, I understand, and I can see how much you love your wife, but..”

“...For better or worse, doctor. I vowed for better and worse. Becoming a complete stranger to her is probably the worst. I’ll take care of her. I’ll take her to rehab myself if I have to. But she’s coming home.”

The neurologist observed him for a long moment, then looked at everyone around him.

“Very well. We’ll keep her for one more day, and if everything looks good after the final tests, we’ll let her go home.”

“Thank you, doctor.”

Tim shook the doctor’s hand and returned to his seat, trying to process the news. Angela sat beside him, offering the silent support he needed.

“Bradford, see me tomorrow morning.”

Tim nodded without looking up, his lieutenant placing a hand on his shoulder before leaving the room, inviting the others to do the same. One by one, they spoke a word to Tim before leaving him alone, just with Angela.

“Tim, are you sure about this?”

“Of course, Ange. Of course.”

“You know you can count on any of us? That we’ll be there to help you and support her however we can?”

“And what if… what if she never remembers?”

“Then you’ll start over. If she was the love of your life in one life, she will be in the next. But Tim, give her time. Give *yourself* time. You should go back and see her.”

Tim looked at her briefly and nodded. He whispered a thank you before getting up, wiping his hands on his jeans, and heading toward room 456. He took a deep breath before knocking and entering.

He closed the door slowly behind him and turned around. And he couldn’t help it, he just stood there, still, watching her. His Lucy.

Sitting in her bed, her gaze locked onto his, unintentionally. Like an uncontrollable pull.

“Hey…” she said, unsure.

“Hey…” he replied, a faint smile on his lips. “May I?” he asked, gesturing toward the chair next to her bed.

Lucy nodded. Tim sat down beside her, and nervously, Lucy began playing with the edge of her blanket. Then, she took a deep breath…

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be, Lucy…”

“I don’t remember anything. I don’t know why I’m here. I don’t know who I am, and it’s possible I never will. And I don’t remember you, who you are… and I know it hurts you, I can see it in your eyes. I’m really sorry.”

Instinctively, Tim reached out to take her hand but pulled back—probably too soon. Lucy watched him again, as if trying to force her brain to remember…

“Who are you?”

“Your husband, Lucy. We got married six months ago…”

Chapter Text

“Your husband, Lucy. We got married six months ago.”

Married. She was married. How could she have forgotten?

“I don’t remember…”

The room was filled with an involuntary, almost awkward silence. What could he say? She hadn’t chosen to forget, to erase the past years, life had made that choice for her.

“Tim?”

“Yes?”

“What happened?” she finally asked, her throat tight.

“You were chasing a suspect, and… you entered that street, he attacked you from behind, you fought, defended yourself, and then a blow, hard, to the head, against the ground.”

“Did I make it? The police academy?”

“Yes, you made it. You’re a sergeant.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“I guess it must have been terrifying, getting that kind of call.”

“I was there, Lucy…”

“You were there?”

“I’m a sergeant too, at the same station as you…”

“Oh…” she said, surprised. “Even more terrifying, huh?”

“Yes…”

“And then I wake up, with no memories.”

“And I’m here.”

“Yes…”

“What happens now?”

“You have to stay under observation one more night, and then… listen, I know it’s going to sound strange, but then I’ll take you home. Our home. Your home. And we’ll take all the time we need, but I’ll help you get your memories back. And there’s a whole world out there ready to help you remember who you are.”

“And if… if I never get those memories back?”

“Then we’ll make new ones. I know this must be hard for you, but trust me. Let me help you.”

“We’re married, but…”

“Yes, and I’ll talk about it as much as you want. I can also not talk about it at all, if that’s what you prefer. Just let yourself be guided. No pressure. I have faith…”

“In what?”

“If life gave us all this once, I’m convinced it can give it to us again.”

“Maybe…”

And then the silence returned. She kept looking at him from every angle. Nothing. Nothing came back. Nothing. The only thing she was somewhat sure of was that, strangely, she felt safe with him. Maybe a bit too safe for someone she didn’t know. But the more she looked at him, the more she saw the strength it took for him to hold back from being her husband.

“Do you need space?” he finally asked.

“Yes… No. Maybe. I don’t know. I’m tired…”

“Get some rest…”

“Are you leaving?”

“I can stay if you want.”

“If you leave, will you come back?”

“Always, Lucy. Always.”

And it was as if he had said exactly the words she needed to hear. She closed her eyes and fell asleep within seconds. Tim waited a little while before leaving the room, letting the nurses know he was heading out, reminding them he was only twenty minutes away.

Angela was still there. Silently, she drove him home, to their home. She didn’t need to say a word; he knew. A simple nod as thanks, and Tim stepped inside.

He took time to take care of Kojo, opened a beer, then disappeared into the shower before heading to bed.

Lying in the dark, his mind racing, eyes fixed on the ceiling, Tim was terrified. He was scared he had lost the love of his life, afraid this life they had built would vanish into nothing.
But he knew he was ready to fight—for her, for them.

Chapter Text

"Are you ready?"

Lucy looked around, giving her hospital room one last glance before nodding briefly and offering Tim a timid smile.

Silently, she followed him through the hospital corridors, out into the parking lot, and up to his truck. He opened the door for her, and as he started the engine, Lucy turned her head toward the window, watching the world outside. She knew these streets, recognized them as they passed one after the other, and yet she felt like a stranger to this outside world, almost regretting having left that hospital room just minutes earlier.

Then, little by little, the landscape began to feel less familiar, as if she had changed cities. The car suddenly slowed, and Tim turned off the engine.

Lucy understood they had probably arrived : home. It still felt strange to call it “home,” when her last memory of having one was that tiny studio she’d found by sheer luck, with a couch doubling as a bed because she couldn’t afford anything more.

Tim got out of the car first, took a deep breath, and walked around to open her door. They walked toward the front door together.

"Kojo is probably waiting behind the door…"

"Kojo?"

"Our dog. Before he was ours, he was yours… then mine…"

"Oh… I…"

"I know…" Tim looked at her for a few seconds. "Hey, don’t be too hard on yourself, okay?"

"Hm…"

And sure enough, as soon as the door opened and Lucy stepped inside, Kojo immediately came toward her. She instinctively took a step back, but chose to trust, crouching down to his level. As if he understood, Kojo approached gently, giving her a few soft nudges with his nose on her forearm.

"Welcome home…"

Lucy looked up at Tim, standing behind her, hands in his pockets. She stood, wincing slightly as her ribs still ached. Just like that morning, she scanned the house—her house—searching for a memory waiting for her there, hoping to find a piece of herself. But nothing. Just emptiness. Strangeness.

"Want a tour?" he offered.

"Okay."

He started with the living room, then the backyard, the kitchen, and the hallway. With every step, Lucy examined the photos: glimpses of a life unintentionally paused. Unknown faces: hers, his, theirs. She looked happy. In love. Alive. He did too. Then Tim opened a door.

"Our bedroom…"

Lucy stepped inside the room, a beautiful blend of two people. And then it hit her: their bedroom, their bed—where they’d slept, where they’d made love countless times. She brought a hand to her throat. She couldn’t breathe.

"Lucy? Are you okay?"

"Hm."

And suddenly, Tim realized what he had just said.

"Oh…" he began. "Don’t worry, I- I’ll sleep in the guest room."

"No, no… I’m not going to take your bed from you."

"It’s your bed too, you know. The guest room’s just next door. All your things are here…"

"I…"

"It’s okay. Really."

Lucy looked at him, almost tenderly, and followed him through the rest of the house. In the bathroom, she found a small fragment of normalcy: her shower gel, her perfume, her lipstick. They ended the tour with the guest bedroom. It really was just across from theirs.

"Can I take a shower?"

"You don’t have to ask, you’re home. Go ahead. I’ll start dinner. Want anything in particular?"

"Oh, um… I don’t know. Surprise me?"

Tim was caught off guard by her answer, so was Lucy, if she was being honest. He chuckled, shaking his head, and watched her disappear into their bedroom.

Lucy closed the door behind her and walked around the room, her room, their room. A wedding photo on the bedside table, their diplomas on the wall, a frame with multiple Polaroids of them : one for each month since their wedding. A bowl of rings and bracelets, a book open and flipped over on the second nightstand. She made her way to the closet, fingers trailing over the hanging clothes and folded ones on the shelves. She found her underwear and grabbed a T-shirt and leggings from what must have been her side, then headed to the bathroom.

She turned on the water and quickly undressed, stepping under the hot stream. She exhaled loudly. And then, without warning, the tears came, slowly at first, then freely, without asking for permission.

The fear. The anxiety of being the shadow of someone she had forgotten. Living a life that wasn’t hers yet in the present, even though it had once been. Seeing traces of a joyful life that her brain had decided to erase. But most of all, seeing this man, whom she had no memory of, being there. For her. Seeing, through the pictures, the love he had for her.

She felt like she was stealing part of his life, maybe his whole life. And then she took a deep breath and washed away every trace of the hospital from her body.

A few minutes later, Lucy stepped out of the bedroom and walked toward the kitchen. Her steps were quiet, as if afraid to disturb. She watched Tim from behind, cooking.

"What are you making?"

Tim turned around, startled. Of all the outfits she could have picked, she had unknowingly chosen a T-shirt far too big for her. One of his shirts from long ago, the last army T-shirt he had, and one he’d lost to her when she moved in. And she looked so beautiful. And it was so hard not to say it. Not to show it. Not to touch her. Not to kiss her.

"Tim?"

"Pancakes. I’m making pancakes."

"I like pancakes."

"Mm-hm, I know. You also like breakfast for dinner. You always say it must be morning somewhere in the world…"

Lucy nodded and sat down on a stool. A few minutes later, Tim joined her, plate full of pancakes in hand.

Lucy stole a glance at him. There was something gentle about him, something comforting in the way he looked at her, talked to her. And even though everything was blurry, even though their lives were turned upside down, he was here.

She figured that must be one of the reasons she’d married this man, and not another.

Chapter Text

It was a distant sound that pulled Tim from his sleep. A dull, unfamiliar noise. He got out of bed and walked toward the kitchen. He stopped a few feet away, watching for a moment. Lucy was awake, desperately searching for something in the kitchen.

“Looking for something?”

Lucy jumped, far too focused to realize someone had been watching her.

“Tea?”

“Bottom right drawer.”

“Who keeps tea in a drawer?”

“You do… Go sit down, I’ll take care of it.”

Lucy nodded and headed to the couch. Five minutes later, Tim joined her, handing her a steaming mug. They stayed there silently, in the dim light. It was 3 a.m., a time when they should have been asleep.

“Everything okay, Luce?”

Lucy turned her head toward him, placed the mug on her knees, and shook her head quickly.

“No…” she replied, tears threatening to fall. “I can’t sleep. I want to sleep, close my eyes and forget that I forgot everything. I’m surrounded by memories that aren’t mine anymore, I’m lost in my own house… Explain it to me, explain why I have a date tattooed on my ribs, because I don’t even remember getting that tattoo…”

She wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes with the back of her hand. Tim wished he could’ve started with a different memory, a different moment.

“Maybe we should start somewhere else…”

“Why?”

“Because… that day, you died.”

“I don’t need you to protect me, I need to know… even if it hurts.”

Tim looked her straight in the eyes and began telling the story: Caleb, the meaning of her tattoo, the barrel buried six feet under, the rescue, the CPR, her first breath. And Lucy listened, patiently, absorbing each word one by one.

“And it was probably in that moment, deep down, that I fell in love with you. The very idea of losing you, of not finding you in time, froze my blood. It took me a while to realize it…” he finished.

Then, without thinking, Lucy reached for his hand and let her thumb gently trace back and forth along his skin.

“Thank you…” she whispered.

They stayed like that for a moment, in comforting silence, their hands intertwined, as if time had stopped. Tim eventually stood up, under Lucy’s questioning gaze, disappeared, and came back a few seconds later.

“Here. Your phone. I charged it, removed your password. Maybe it’ll help you remember some things.”

“Hm hm, thank you. We should get some sleep.”

Tim turned off the light, and just before Lucy closed her bedroom door, he called out:

“If you need anything, I’m right across the hall. No matter the time, no matter the reason.”

“Goodnight, Tim,” she said, a small smile on her lips.

“Goodnight, Lucy…”

Their doors closed behind them.

Unable to sleep, Lucy grabbed her phone, opened the photo folder, and began scrolling through. It was a mix of everything and anything: selfies, candid shots, landscapes, an uncountable number of photos of Kojo. A few wedding pictures, too. And then, some more intimate photos, of the two of them, sometimes half-dressed, happy. Lucy felt almost embarrassed. She wondered, just for a second, if looking through all these pictures was really a good idea. Her chest tightened at the sight of so many forgotten memories, so many faces… until—

“Angela…”

Lucy had just associated a name with a face. She stared at the photo for a while, making sure she wasn’t mistaken. The story was still blurry, but the name was real. For a few seconds, she wanted to open the door, cross the hallway and tell Tim that yes, finally, a fragment had returned. But… she stopped. The fear of hurting him, that she remembered Angela but not him.

She continued exploring her memories, leaving the photos behind and diving into her messages. Her conversations with Tim, a mix of love and humor, tenderness and silly things like grocery lists. All of it, their “them” that she was discovering through words and pictures, moved her deeply. She opened a few unread messages from her mother, realizing that, in reality, not much had changed. Then she found Angela’s messages. She hesitated for a few seconds and started typing.

From Lucy, to Angela W-E: “ Looking at photos, I suddenly remembered your name, your face. The rest is still a bit blurry, but that’s a good start, right? Tim doesn’t know, not yet—I don’t want to hurt him. Take care. Lucy ”

Sent.

Across the hall, Tim was also scrolling through photos on his phone. He knew he was lucky she was alive, but he missed his Lucy. Sleeping beside her, holding her when he wanted, just being close. And what if? What if she never remembered who she used to be? What if they had to start all over, hoping she'd choose him again? The possibilities were endless, joyful, and heartbreaking. But she was there, across the hallway, in their home.

At 8 a.m., Lucy woke up and placed her feet on the floor. She stood, still half asleep, her hair messy, one hand rubbing her eyes, trying to wipe away the remnants of sleep.

She opened the bathroom door without thinking and froze in her tracks.

Tim, just out of the shower, towel wrapped around his waist.

Tim, equally frozen.

For a moment, they stood there, silently, Lucy scanning him from head to toe. Tim reliving countless mornings just like this.

“Uh, I, sorry, I, um, sorry,” she stammered, quickly turning around and leaving the bathroom as fast as possible, slamming the door behind her.

Awkward. It was awkward. She was awkward. She stopped for a moment, trying to clear her head, realizing that this little intrusion hadn’t left her indifferent. Her heart was racing, her stomach pleasantly tight. After regaining her composure, she headed to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee.

A few minutes later, Tim joined her and sat across from her.

“I have to go to the station this morning, won’t be long. You’ll be okay?”

“Oh, yes, of course,” she started. “Tim, about earlier… I’m really sorry. I’ll be more careful now.”

“You don’t have to apologize, it’s okay.”

“Hm…”

“Shoot, I’ve gotta go.”

Tim put his cup in the sink and walked toward Lucy.

“See you later?”

And then suddenly, he didn’t know what to do. Before the accident, he would’ve kissed her, but now? And Lucy, in a split second, understood the battle going on in his head. She placed a hand on his arm and gave him a shy smile.

“See you later,” she replied.

Tim left the house, his heart a little lighter. And now, everything was quiet. She looked around, left then right, and her gaze landed directly on Kojo.

“Wanna go out, Kojo?”

The dog trotted over to her. She got him ready, slipped on her sneakers, grabbed what looked like the house keys, her phone, clipped on Kojo’s leash, and stepped outside.

“It’s just a little walk. Let’s go, everything’s going to be fine.”

Chapter Text

What was supposed to be just a simple walk no longer felt like one. When Lucy tried to turn back, reality suddenly caught up with her. She didn’t know where she was. She could have just used the GPS on her phone, if only she could remember her address. She tried several paths, several streets, but the more she walked, the more she felt like she was getting farther away.

Lucy had to face the truth: she was lost.

She took a deep breath and sat down on the bench beside her. Lucy tried to regain control of her breathing, of her racing heartbeat, and to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. She stared into the emptiness around her. All she had wanted was to step outside for a few minutes with her dog, get some fresh air, and pretend she was living something other than the fog of the past few days. Failed.

Lucy pulled her phone out of her pocket, hesitated, and tapped the number.

“Lucy?”

“I’m lost.”

“Where are you?”

“I..I don’t know.”

“Breathe, look for the street name.”

“Redford Avenue, 112.”

“I’m coming.”

A few minutes later, a car pulled up in front of her. Lucy lifted her head. Angela was there, standing alone. It was a strange feeling. Everything was still blurry, memories buried under a thick layer of forgetfulness, but seeing her face was… comforting. Angela approached slowly, just as shaken as Lucy. The two women looked at each other in silence before Angela sat down next to her.

“I just wanted to…”

“I know, Lucy, I know,” she said gently. “Does Tim know?”

“No. I panicked. I called you.”

“Come on, I’ll take you to the station.”

“You don’t know Tim’s address?”

“I do. But there’s no way I’m leaving you alone like this.”

Lucy nodded and followed Angela to the car. Kojo hopped in the back, blissfully unaware of the situation. The ride was quiet until they reached the parking lot.

“I can’t…”

“You can’t what?”

“Go in. I’m not ready to have everyone come up to me, talk to me, and have no answers to give. You’re the only face I remember.”

“I got your message, you know, but… I didn’t know what to say. What the right words were.”

“It’s okay. You came today. That’s enough.”

“Can you wait in the car? I’ll go get Tim.”

“Yes…”

Angela hesitated for a moment, then decided to briefly hug Lucy. Just long enough for her to hear her whisper a thank you.

Tim knocked on the window a few minutes later. Lost in thought, Lucy jumped, then stepped out of the car. Their eyes met.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, on the verge of breaking.

He promised himself he’d apologize later, but that sight shattered his heart. He stepped closer and wrapped his arms around her. She didn’t resist.

“Are you okay?”

“I am now.”

She didn’t really know why she said that, or why her hands clung to him, but something inside her shifted. Unknowingly, unconsciously, she needed this: the contact, the warmth, the hand resting on the back of her head while the other gently held her. For a few seconds, she felt alive again, not like the shadow of someone she no longer recognized. Tim slowly pulled back and looked at her. The world paused for a few more seconds, then resumed its rhythm when Kojo barked.

“Shall we head back?” she asked.

“Hm. Or… we could go get something to eat?”

“Oh, hm, yeah… if you want.”

“Come on.”

“What about Kojo?”

“Angela’s got him. Don’t worry.”

They headed to his truck and got in. The drive didn’t take long, just a few minutes before they parked in front of some food trucks. Silently, Lucy followed Tim to one of them.

“We come here a lot during patrol. It’s probably one of your favorite spots. Want to look at the menu?”

“Oh, uh… no. Could you order what I usually get?”

“Yeah. A veggie burger and fries…”

“…extra pickles.”

Tim looked at her tenderly for a few seconds.

“Extra pickles.”

They sat at a table a little apart from everyone else and started eating.

“Do you… do you want to talk about it?”

“I just wanted to go out and walk Kojo. And I got lost.”

“And you called Angela…”

“Yes.” Lucy put down her burger. “Yesterday I was going through my phone, and I came across a photo. I remembered her name, that’s all. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t really know what to say. And I called her because… I don’t know, maybe I was ashamed.”

“Lucy, you have nothing to be ashamed of.”

“Tim, I got lost like a child in a mall.”

“And that’s okay.”

“You’re not mad at me?”

“Mad about what?”

“Not calling you… not telling you I remembered her photo and her name…”

“No. Why would I be?”

“Because we’re married, and this must be hard for you…”

“Lucy, neither of us chose this. And you don’t get to choose which memories come back either. Yes, we’re married. Yes, this situation is hard. But if finding you means waiting until I’m the last memory to come back… then I’ll wait.”

Her heart tightened a little, but in a different way this time. She looked at him, deeply, and felt relieved it was him. She couldn’t explain why, but the feeling of safety, of peace she felt next to him was so natural, so powerful. She realized how lucky she was not to be married to a man who would’ve given up, who would’ve let her go through this alone.

“And also…”

“And also?”

“You remembered something earlier.”

“Oh?”

“Extra pickles.”

“Oh…”

Lucy didn’t dare ask if that meant something, because clearly, it did. She just smiled. They stayed there for a while, talking, about everything and nothing, until Lucy asked about her parents. Tim told her about the past few years, confirming what she had seen in her phone and their absence since she woke up.

On the way back, they stopped to pick up a few groceries before heading home. Lucy jumped in the shower while Tim opened a beer. He thanked Angela once again and settled in front of the TV. They shared a quick meal in front of a movie before retreating to their separate rooms for the night.

Once again, Lucy couldn’t sleep. Probably too overwhelmed by the day’s emotions and the unanswered questions. She sighed, got up, and paced around her room. Her eyes landed on a photo of her and Tim. She suddenly remembered the feeling of safety and warmth when he had held her earlier.

Timidly, she opened her bedroom door and stopped in front of his. She took a small breath and gently opened the door.

“Tim?"

Chapter Text

“Tim?”

Tim quickly opened his eyes before sitting up and looking toward the door. She was standing in the doorway, looking lost, uncomfortable, playing with the hem of her t-shirt.

“Lucy? Is everything okay?”

And in response, she simply shook her head no, biting her lower lip.

“Come here…” he said, patting the empty space beside him, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Lucy hesitated for a few seconds before moving toward the bed. She hesitated again before climbing onto the mattress and settling next to Tim. They stayed silent for a while, giving her the space she needed to sort through her thoughts.

“I can’t sleep. I keep replaying the day over and over in my head. And when it finally stops, I remember that I’ve forgotten everything. That I’ve forgotten that life, my life… our life. I see all those pictures, all those memories, and yet, nothing. And I hate myself for it. And still, despite all that, you’re here. Despite everything, I feel safe with you, even though I don’t remember you. Ironically, I wish I could shut my brain off, and yet, I need it to find everything I’ve lost.”

When she finished her sentence, she turned her head toward Tim. He was there, facing her, attentive, present. Their eyes locked for a few seconds.

“Do you need anything?”

Lucy was pulled from her daydream, from that place her subconscious had retreated to.

“A hug?”

“Come here.”

And as if it were second nature, as if their bodies were made for this, Lucy leaned into him, letting Tim wrap his arms around her gently, placing her hand over his chest. Tim held her tighter before resting his chin on the top of her head. He tenderly traced her arm with his fingers, caressing her skin.

Lucy realized that this was exactly what she needed. That closeness, that comfort, that presence. She let herself be carried by the moment.

“Tim?”

“Hm?”

“What was it like? Our wedding…”

Tim’s face lit up instantly.

“Perfect.”

“Would you… Would you tell me about it?”

“We decided to have a small wedding. Something intimate, just with the people who mattered. There weren’t many of us, but it was more than enough. We got married at the Wayfarers Chapel. It wasn’t the place we’d originally chosen, but one day we went for a walk there, you wanted to go inside to visit, and I had this revelation. Seeing you in the middle of the aisle made me realize it had to be there and nowhere else.

And then the day came. I waited for you what felt like an eternity, thinking you had decided to leave Los Angeles at the last minute. Even before the music started, you arrived. You were radiant. You wore this dress, simple, but incredible, your hair was up, and you were wearing the necklace, the very first one I gave you. Your parents decided not to come, and being as stubborn as you are, you said that if your father wouldn’t walk you down the aisle, you’d do it yourself.

The closer you got, the harder it was for me to stay grounded. It all felt surreal. After everything we’d been through, you were walking toward me, for forever. And for the first time in a long time, and probably the first time for some of our colleagues there, tears ran down my face and I couldn’t control them.

When you reached me, I took a deep breath, you wiped the few tears from the corners of your eyes, and then mine. We exchanged vows, kissed, and walked out slowly, hand in hand. I held you in my arms, and you told me then that you’d chosen my name, mine and no one else’s.

The rest of the night? We danced, drank, celebrated with our friends, and then Angela handed us a key, an address, and pushed us out the door.”

“The ocean view…”

Tim stopped caressing her arm for a moment at the end of her sentence as his heart skipped a beat. A memory fragment, insignificant to others, but so meaningful to him, to them. Images of that room, that night, that soft morning waking up naked and entwined, her scent, the smile on her face.

“Yes… the ocean view,” he replied, pressing a tender kiss to the top of her head.

“How did you propose to me?”

“Oh, I had something planned, it was all set in my head… and then, one Sunday morning I got up after you, which is rare. You were making breakfast, wearing my clothes again. You looked beautiful. I came up behind you, wrapped my arms around you, you jumped a little and turned your head to say good morning. I rested my head on your shoulder, and I just knew. I simply said: ‘Marry me.’ The ring was still hidden in the bedroom. You dropped the spatula, turned around, looked at me like you were trying to be sure you’d heard right, and said yes. And then we, well, we…”

“We what?”

“Uh, we… celebrated… in the kitchen…”

“Oh…”

A small awkward laugh escaped them both. Tim remembered the moment vividly, the sensuality, her body against his, the way she wrapped her legs around him after he sat her on the kitchen counter. Her mouth on his neck, her nails leaving marks down his back. That burning desire to become one.

Lucy, on her end, felt a pleasant warmth deep in her belly, as if her body was trying to remind her of those sensations, and it was comforting, and good.

Selfishly, they let themselves drift in each other’s arms, letting their thoughts wander in silence.

“Are you okay?”

“I am now ” she said, tightening her embrace.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

The morning light woke Tim. They must have fallen asleep without realizing it, because when he opened his eyes slowly, Lucy was still there, asleep against him, peaceful.

He let himself enjoy that stolen moment, having her in his arms, like before, as if the accident had never happened, as if she hadn’t forgotten. Then, he placed a soft kiss on the top of her head before getting up, pulling the sheet over her again. And like before, subconsciously, Lucy groaned when he moved away from her.

Tim left a note on the kitchen counter and went for a run. Lucy woke up a few minutes later. She was surprised to be somewhere other than her bed, but memories from the night came back to her, bringing a shy smile to her lips. She got up and headed to the kitchen. The house was quiet.

When Tim returned, he came face-to-face with Lucy, wrapped in a bath towel in the middle of the living room. And he couldn’t help it, he looked at her, devoured her with his eyes.

“Uh, I, the phone rang, and uh, I thought it was you, and I…”

“Hm hmm.”

He didn’t know what to say. She was just there, naturally beautiful. As for Lucy, she didn’t know anymore. That strange flutter in her belly came rushing back the instant Tim’s eyes landed on her.

“Shower...uh...I’ll go back to the bathroom. Unless you, uh… unless you want to go? You just went for a run and…” she mumbled, eyes fixed on the wet t-shirt clinging to his body.

“Hm no, I’ll go after. I’ll… um, make coffee. Yes, coffee.”

Lucy nodded quickly, then headed toward the hallway. She stopped abruptly and turned back toward him.

“Tim?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you for last night.”

Tim offered her a silent reply. She walked back toward the bathroom under his gaze. He was hopelessly in love with her, more and more every day. He would give anything to be able to say “I love you” to her again.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

WAYFARERS CHAPEL. (Rancho Palos Verde - CA) - 50 min car ride from LA. 

Chapter Text

Lucy was surprised that morning when Tim sat down next to her in the neurologist’s waiting room. She had convinced him to go to work, assuring him she could manage taking a cab to her appointment on her own. He had eventually given in. And yet, here he was, in uniform, right beside her, with an almost satisfied smile and a tender look in his eyes.

“Thank you…”

Then her name was called. Hesitant, she stood and entered the room, Tim following behind her. The doctor asked many questions, performed a few tests, answered all of hers, and asked her to return in a month.

“A penny for your thoughts?” he asked as the elevator doors closed.

“Hm?”

“What’s going on?”

“Oh. He didn’t seem worried about my memory loss. I was expecting answers, and in the end… I just feel like I’ve wasted my time.”

“Lucy…”

“I know… He can’t magically make me get my memory back. But right now, I’m angry and I don’t know what to do.”

Naturally, Tim stepped closer and pulled her into his arms, gently. The effect was immediate, as if this closeness were the cure to all her problems. The elevator stopped, Tim kissed the top of her head before the doors opened.

“It’s going to be okay. You’re allowed to be angry, alright? Come on, I’ll take you home.”

Lucy nodded and followed him silently. Tim opened the back door, letting her get in before taking the driver’s seat.

“Sergeant? Ma’am. Pleasure to see you.”

Lucy looked at the man who had just spoken, then quickly glanced at the rearview mirror. Her mouth opened slightly, unsure what to say, and she shook her head at Tim, who was watching her, before turning her gaze back to the man sitting beside him.

“Thank you,” she replied simply.

“Miles, please…”

“Yes, sir, sorry.”

Of course Miles knew. Everyone knew. He suddenly seemed embarrassed for starting this conversation with Lucy, probably forgetting that he might not exist in her memory.

The ride was silent. When their house came into view, Tim stopped the shop and got out, opened the back door. Before stepping out, Lucy quickly said goodbye to Miles and rejoined Tim.

“You gonna be alright?”

“Yes, don’t worry.”

“You know you can call me?”

“Hm. Tim?”

“Yeah?”

“How many people have I forgotten?”

“A few. But you know it’s not permanent?”

“We don’t know that, Tim… But, do you think we could invite them?”

“All of them?”

“Yes. Do you think that’s a bad idea?”

“Not at all… Do you want to?”

“I think so. Tonight?”

“Tonight…”

“You can?”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“Thanks…”

Tim awkwardly patted her shoulder as he said goodbye.

“Be safe,” she added, like she used to before.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

When Tim came home later that day, he wasn’t alone : Tamara, Celina, and Angela were there. He could have invited more people, but he preferred to start small, just in case. He didn’t even have time to warn her they were there before Lucy appeared in the entryway.

Time seemed to stop for a few long seconds. Lucy stared at the group in front of her, focusing on each unfamiliar face. Tamara was on the verge of tears, and Celina wasn’t far behind. Tim and Angela stood still, watching silently.

Tamara was the first to take a step toward her, slowly, as if afraid to scare her, as if afraid to face a reality she wasn’t ready for. She stopped in front of Lucy and extended her hand.

“Tamara.”

Lucy turned her gaze on the young woman, studying her face. Her eyes said everything : a mix of joy, fear, and sadness. Slowly, Lucy stepped forward, opened her arms, and wrapped them around her a few seconds later. That was all it took for Tamara to silently break into tears against her. Lucy tightened her hold for a few more moments before letting go. Automatically, silently, she brushed away the tears from Tamara’s face before stepping back.

It was like an impulse, a visceral need to hold her, to comfort her without using words. To be there without remembering. But that gaze, that piercing gaze, was not unfamiliar to her.

Her eyes then found Celina, who introduced herself simply. Angela, still watching, encouraged the girls to move toward the living room, wanting to give Lucy a few seconds to breathe, and Tim a chance to be Tim.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yes… It’s strange, but yes, I’m okay.”

“Do you… uh, do you remember Tamara?”

“Yes and no. I had this impulse, like an instinct to protect her when I looked her in the eyes, but why? She’s important in my life, isn’t she?”

“Yes… Come on, let’s join them.”

Lucy nodded and followed Tim into the living room. Conversations began softly. Lucy listened, watched, stayed quiet. Then she asked a question. Then another. And another. Each answer brought a new question.

“To make it simple? I stole your car, the one you hadn’t locked. I was homeless. You gave me that car. One day I called you, you came to get me, you gave me a roof, a spot on your couch first, then a room, meals, an education. Until the day I spread my wings. And for that, I’ll be eternally grateful.”

“Oh… hm… I…”

The two women looked at each other, eyes and hearts heavy with emotion.

The evening went on as it had started. Lucy absorbing a million pieces of information, hoping her brain would eventually remember. But the more time passed, the harder it became to bear the reality, all those memories no longer truly hers. Little by little, she lost the thread of the conversation, slipping into her thoughts. Tim caught Angela’s eye, signaling it was time to go.

Everyone stood and gathered in the entryway to say goodbye. Angela and Celina simply waved and smiled. Tamara’s goodbye was harder, she didn’t know how to do it. Lucy opened her arms, and Tamara didn’t hesitate a second. She buried herself in Lucy’s embrace, using the intimacy to whisper a few words.

“I missed you.”

Lucy tightened her hold once more, not knowing what to say, refusing to respond with words she didn’t yet fully understand.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

The door closed. Tim turned toward her. She was still, arms wrapped around her stomach, silent, lost.

“Lucy?”

“I’m fine…”

She glanced at him briefly before quickly leaving the room and heading to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. He didn’t insist, she probably needed space, and time. He quickly tidied the living room, put away the glasses on the coffee table, locked up the house, and headed to the bathroom.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Lucy paced her bedroom. She was angry. Not at them, at herself, and at the one who had made her this way. She felt like a spectator to a life that was no longer hers, hurting the people she was meeting all over again. She kept pacing, letting the anger flow, until it faded, until her body stopped moving.

She heard the shower suddenly running through the wall the two rooms shared. She remembered she’d left him standing there, in the entryway. She decided to wait for him in his room to apologize, maybe even talk.

The hallway was dark, except for the faint light coming from the slightly open bathroom door.

Lucy just had to cross, open the door opposite her, and wait. But her hand rested on the ajar door, pushing it open a little more. Then the impulse she’d felt earlier returned. Tim’s back was to her when she stepped into the shower, still fully clothed, and wrapped her arms around him, resting her head against his back.

“Lu… Lucy?”

But he said nothing more when he realized she was crying against him. He didn’t move, just placed his hand over hers. Lucy didn’t even know why she was there, clothed, holding him, crying. All she knew was that she needed it. Her body and mind needed it. That contact, that closeness, knowing without knowing that she could be vulnerable with him.

After a few seconds, Tim decided to turn around and hold her. Lucy let him, letting her body sink into his, no longer having the strength to cling to anything. They stayed like that for a while. Then she let herself be guided by Tim’s steps as he led her out of the shower, wrapped her in a towel, did the same for himself, and fetched some clothes.

With extreme care, looking her in the eyes to respect her privacy, he removed each piece of soaked clothing from her body. After gently drying her, barely brushing against her skin, he dressed her tenderly. He took the time to untangle her hair, dry it quickly, and guided her to their bedroom, turning on the bedside lamp.

Lucy lay down in bed, Tim sitting beside her. He ran his fingers through her hair, like he’d done so many times before. Lucy’s eyes closed quickly. Tim got up, turned off the lamp, and leaned over her, kissing the top of her head, again and again.

“Good night, Luce. I love you.”

Quietly, he left the room, closing the door with one last glance at her.

Chapter Text

The days passed, all the same: long hours alone at home waiting for his return, long conversations at night, questions, sometimes the same ones, and always the same worries. But the more days went by, the more their bond naturally grew again, as if, in the end, she had never really forgotten. It was shy, but it was there. It was a hug in the morning before leaving, her head resting on his shoulder during a movie, all those little things that had once been them.

And if someone had told him he could fall in love with her forever, he would never have believed it, until today.

Lucy, meanwhile, moved forward cautiously, rediscovering all those little things she had once known as a teenager: the butterflies in her stomach, the fear of saying too much or doing too much, the constant desire to be with him and all of it even stronger than when she was fifteen.

She was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard the door open and close.

“Hey, how was your…”

Lucy didn’t finish her sentence. She stood up quickly, put her book down, and went to meet him at the entrance.

“I’m fine.”

Hesitant at first, she brushed her fingers lightly against the scar and the bruise on his face.

“I’m fine, Lucy.”

“You…”

“I’m fine,” he repeated, placing his hands over hers.

“Go sit down, I’ll get you some ice.”

“That’s not necessary.”

“Go sit down.”

For a few seconds, Tim felt like he had his Lucy back, the one from before, the one who didn’t really give him a choice when he was hurt, the one who took care of him even if it wasn’t necessary.

Selfishly, he went to sit on the couch and let her press the ice pack against his face a few seconds later, savoring the closeness, trying to preserve his own memories of her. He watched her, long and tenderly, simply being herself, with all her flaws and all her strengths.

“Thank you…”

“For better or for worse.”

“Hm?”

“That’s what you say when you get married, isn’t it?”

Tim couldn’t help but smile before nodding quickly. Lucy studied his face, his injuries, she knew deep down it wasn’t serious, probably just something he was used to but even deeper inside, there was a fear she couldn’t explain.

“Angela invited us to a barbecue tonight, if you want to…”

“Oh…”

“We don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“Who’s going to be there?”

“Her husband Wesley, their kids, Nyla, Miles, Celina, me.”

“Alright.”

“Are you sure?”

“I think so.”

“We can leave anytime.”

“Okay. Do you think I should change?”

“No need. You look perfect as you are.”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

After stopping on the way to pick up some beers, Tim parked in front of Angela’s house. Lucy took a deep breath before opening the door and stepping out. Tim was quickly by her side.

“Hey, everything’s going to be fine. And remember, we can leave whenever you want.”

Lucy nodded quickly and followed Tim toward the entrance. And as if to reassure herself, to no longer feel so lost and alone, she instinctively reached for his hand, interlacing her fingers with his. Tim squeezed her hand in his, giving her the courage to face the evening. He knocked on the door, and when it opened, their hands quickly slipped apart.

Angela led everyone outside where the evening was already in full swing. Conversations flowed, topics ranging from work to the latest movie, sometimes interrupted by a child’s question. Lucy stayed quiet at first, sitting between Tim and Angela, absorbed in the chatter around her until something made her turn her head to the right.

“Jackson!”

Her gaze searched for far too long, only to notice that the Jackson in question couldn’t have been more than five years old and certainly wasn’t the one who had shared her days at the academy.

At that exact moment, Angela, Tim, and Nyla exchanged glances. It was a detail no one had thought about.

“Lucy?”

“Sorry, I thought…”

“You thought what?” Angela asked, well aware they wouldn’t escape the conversation.

“It’s stupid. At the academy I was friends with a Jackson. The odds of him being here were slim to none, it’s just, the name. Sorry…”

Angela turned to Lucy, taking a deep breath.

“Lucy…”

“Angela, no, not now,” Tim cut her off.

The two women looked at each other intensely.

“Let her talk, please.”

Tim looked at Lucy, then at Angela, before quickly glancing away.

“My son’s name is Jackson, because of your Jackson.”

“You knew Jackson?”

“When you left the academy, you, John, and Jackson were assigned to our division. Tim became your TO, and I became Jackson’s, until I was promoted to detective. My marriage with Wesley… didn’t go exactly the way it should have. I was kidnapped while pregnant by a cartel, who wanted to steal my child. And…” Angela paused, her eyes watering before continuing. “And Jackson was with me when it happened. He tried to protect us, but while I was forced into one vehicle, he was taken into another. He was killed that day. I… I’m so sorry, Lucy.”

Lucy hadn’t even noticed the tears silently streaming down her face. In just a few minutes, she had lost one of the only memories she had left, she had lost a friend. She stood abruptly, Tim following close behind.

“No. I need to be alone.”

She grabbed her beer and left the table, retreating to the back of the garden. Tim gave Angela’s hand a quick squeeze. He didn’t blame her, not one bit. After a long while, he went to find Lucy, lost in her thoughts.

He approached her, hands in his pockets. She looked up quickly, hesitated only a fraction of a second before burying herself in his arms. Tim wrapped her tightly against him.

“I’m sorry. Really sorry.”

“For a moment, I really thought I was going to see him walk in when I heard his name. Like there was only one Jackson in the world. And then hearing it just brought back all those moments at the academy, all those moments I hadn’t forgotten. And in the end, for what? For nothing.”

“I know…”

“And what if nothing ever comes back? How am I supposed to rebuild myself? As a person, as a cop? Tim, what am I going to become?”

“Hey, Luce, breathe. The doctor said it could take time…”

“Or never come back.”

“No matter what… I’ll be here. And we’ll figure it out.”

“Promise?”

“For better or for worse, right?”

The words managed to make her laugh, to smile. She stayed nestled against him for a few more moments before Tim was called from afar.

“Are you going to be okay?” he asked.

“Hm, go ahead.”

Before leaving, he kissed the top of her head and gave her hand a quick squeeze. Lucy soon rejoined the group, sitting down beside Angela.

“Thank you…”

Angela said nothing, fully aware of the heaviness of the subject. Instead, she simply watched Lucy watching Tim.

“Your look at him hasn’t changed…”

“Hm?”

“The way you look at Tim, it hasn’t changed.”

“Oh…”

“Neither has his.”

“Can I… Can I share something with you?”

“Of course.”

“The more days go by, the more I feel like I’m fifteen again when I’m with him, when we talk… you know? I’ve forgotten everything, all of it. I couldn’t even tell you his favorite color, or his favorite meal. I don’t remember anything, not even our wedding. But…”

“But?”

“When I’m with him, I feel protected. I feel alive. I feel…”

“Loved?”

“Yes…” Lucy gave a faint smile. “But it terrifies me. I don’t know what to do with it all. The butterflies, the nerves, all of it.”

“Live it. Life’s too short not to. Yes, you’ve forgotten a huge part of your life, but your body, your soul, your heart remember. You don’t just feel loved : you love him. It’s stronger than you. When you got married, in your vows, you said this: ‘I never believed in soulmates until I met you, until you started loving me, until I started loving you.’ I know you’ve started to get some memories back this past month, it’s a good sign. But stop torturing yourself. Don’t be afraid to love him. He never stopped, and he probably never will. Most people only find that kind of love once in a lifetime. You, without meaning to, are finding it a second time, with the same person.”

“I…”

“Live it, Lucy. Just live it.”

Lucy nodded, took a sip of her beer, then let her gaze drift back to Tim. For the past month, he had been the only constant in her life, putting his own on hold for hers. Maybe Angela was right. Maybe she just needed to live it.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tim and Lucy left the gathering just before midnight. Back home, Lucy insisted on taking care of Kojo and locking up the house. Once the bathroom was free, she showered, slipped into her pajamas, and went to Tim’s room, Angela’s words echoing in her mind: live it, Lucy, just live it.

She knocked before entering. Tim gave her a slight nod as she walked in and climbed into bed. When the light was switched off, Lucy moved closer to Tim, who, though surprised, opened his arm to make room for her. And as if she had never stopped doing it, she rested her head on his chest, her hand just above his heart. Tim closed his arm around her, his hand gently caressing her shoulder.

“In spite of everything, I had a good evening.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Do you think we could go see Jackson?”

“Of course…”

“Not right away, but someday.”

“When you’re ready.”

“Mhm.”

Lucy let herself be lulled by the strokes on her shoulder, his fingers brushing her skin. It was so comforting, so soothing, so normal, as if her body had never forgotten. Her eyes closed in intervals, her hand curling slightly against his chest.

“’Night, babe,” she mumbled, half-asleep.

“’Night, love…”

He watched her drift into deep sleep, curled up against him, the word babe echoing in his head. She was the only one who ever called him that, the only one he let call him that. It had always been her yesterday, it was her today, and it would be her tomorrow.

Chapter Text

When Lucy opened her eyes, she immediately realized she wasn’t in her bed, nor in her room. The memory of joining Tim last night when she got home resurfaced. It wasn’t unpleasant waking up here. The spot beside her was empty but still warm, as if he had only just left. She checked the time on her phone: 6 a.m.

She took her time waking up, savoring the quiet in the house and in her own mind, letting her thoughts wander back to the position they’d fallen asleep in, remembering Angela’s advice.

And if her memories never came back? Did that mean she should stop living? Should she give all of this up? Should she ignore what was slowly growing inside her every time she saw him, every time he looked at her? And at the same time, should she really live as if her memories would never resurface? Should she take the bull by the horns, move forward, force her mind to remember anyway?

What did she have to lose that she hadn’t already lost? Probably nothing.

She got up, glanced at herself quickly in the mirror, then left the room and headed for the kitchen. He was there, sitting with his back to her, probably drinking his coffee.

“Morning.”

Tim turned, a slight smile on his lips.

“Sleep well?”

“Mhm.”

Lucy walked to the coffee machine, feeling Tim’s eyes follow her. She poured herself a cup and joined him at the counter, sitting down beside him.

“Tim?”

“Mhm?”

“Do you think I could come with you to work today?”

“What do you mean?”

“Spend the whole day with you, go out on the field. Oh, of course without a weapon, without anything, just observing. Maybe, I don’t know… maybe it could help me.”

“Oh, hm, let me make a call to get permission.”

“Okay. With you… or with someone else…”

“As if I’d let you go with anyone else,” he said, already on his feet, phone to his ear.

And she couldn’t help it, such a simple, seemingly insignificant sentence planted a shy, indelible smile on her face.

“Yes, sir. See you soon.”

Tim hung up and slid his phone into his pocket.

“You think you can be ready in ten minutes?”

“Uh, yeah… why?”

“Go. We’re leaving in ten.”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tim parked his truck in the usual spot. He glanced at Lucy, who didn’t look nearly as calm as she had leaving the house.

“You okay?”

“Nervous, I guess…”

“If you’re not ready, I can take you back home.”

“No, no. I want to spend the day with you, out in the field. It’s not that…”

“Then what is it?”

“Facing people… not being able to put a name to a face, or even hold a conversation with them.”

“You know everyone’s aware of what’s going on with you, right?”

“That’s exactly it… the way people will look at me.”

“Luce, it’s going to be fine. Angela will take you to the locker room, I’ll be waiting outside. Then we’ll see Grey, and head out for the day. A normal day. Okay?”

Lucy nodded and opened the car door. Tim took a deep breath and did the same. And just like when they’d arrived at Angela’s, Lucy linked her hand with Tim’s as they walked to the door. And, as if nothing had happened, their hands separated as the doors opened.

Tim hadn’t lied, Angela was there, waiting to escort Lucy to the locker room. Of course, every gaze turned toward her, whispered conversations probably about her, but what could she do?

Angela led Lucy to her locker. And just as she was about to pull out her phone to ask Tim for the code, Lucy spun the dial herself, aligning the numbers. Angela said nothing, simply watched as Lucy set her bag inside and closed the door. Together, they made their way to Grey’s office with Tim. Grey asked to speak to Lucy alone for a few minutes. Tim stayed within visual distance, just in case.

“She remembered her code.”

“Excuse me?”

“Her locker code. Didn’t even have to ask you, just did it on her own. You okay?”

“Worried.”

“Talk.”

“What if something happens to her?”

“What do you think could happen? You’re probably going to lock her in the back of the vehicle or have Miles stick to her like glue. Tim, everything’s going to be fine. She probably needs this.”

“Hm… her code?”

“Yeah. Her code. Says a lot, doesn’t it?”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

After speaking with Grey, Lucy joined Tim and Miles. The rules were clear: no handling weapons, no arrests, bulletproof vest required, and she was not to leave Tim’s side for a single second unless ordered otherwise in the field. Surprisingly, as they left the office, Grey handed her a badge. “Sergeant, aren’t you forgetting something?” he said.

The first few minutes passed in silence. Lucy stared at her badge, reading the word “Sergeant” over and over. Her memories stopped at the academy. How far had she come to earn this? What had she faced to already hold this rank at her age?

The first calls came in: public intoxication, domestic violence, theft in a small store, traffic accident.

“Miles?”

“Yes, ma’am?”

“Your gun hand should always be free. It isn’t.”

Miles nodded. Tim, silent, watched Lucy for a moment. Something had shifted. She seemed alert, observant. For a split second, he felt like he had her back. Just a flicker but enough to give him hope. Maybe this day wasn’t such a bad idea after all. His thoughts were interrupted by dispatch: another street fight.

“Boot, Lucy, in the car.”

Miles opened the back door for Lucy before taking his seat up front. Remembering her earlier comment, he shot Tim a look and a small smile, which Tim understood without a word.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

The vehicle stopped in front of a store, where two men were fighting. One was worse off than the other. Tim told Miles to step in first while he opened the door for Lucy. Tim and Miles broke up the fight quickly, sending each man on his way.

Lucy, meanwhile, stayed back, observing, amused by human stupidity. A sound to her left drew her attention. At a distance, Tim saw her face go rigid, pale, blank. She took a few steps forward, absorbed, his eyes locked on her, maintaining a safe distance.

Suddenly, she froze, facing a side street. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, chills ran down her spine and then came the flashes: a chase, silence amid city noise, a gun in her hands, a shot, a loss of balance. She wrapped her arms around herself, gripping tightly as if to shield herself.

Another flash: falling to the ground, a man stronger much stronger, blows, forced restraint, the cold pavement, that foul smell, the taste of blood, her head slamming against the ground, breath knocked out, excruciating pain, and then, little by little, nothingness. Darkness. Complete.

Her body began trembling involuntarily, tears streaming down her face. This was where she’d lost everything, where she’d lost who she was.

It took Tim only seconds to understand, to realize that this call had brought them to that street, where he had found Lucy unconscious on the ground. He ordered Miles to stay put.

He approached her slowly, careful not to startle her. He murmured her name. She turned, looked at him deeply, and collapsed into his arms. She wished she could forget it all, the pain, the smells, the tastes.

From afar, Miles watched helplessly. He pulled out his phone, wanting to keep this private, off the radio, and called one of the few people Tim, and likely Lucy, trusted completely: Angela. He could have called Grey, but would that have done more harm than good? She answered after two rings.

“Ma’am, I think we’re going to need you…”

He explained quickly. She didn’t let him finish, assuring him she was on her way.

A short distance away, still wrapped in each other’s arms, Tim silently cursed himself for not recognizing the place sooner, for not protecting her. Without admitting that he too was reliving what he wished he could forget: a call over the radio, screeching tires, an ambulance, far too many people, Lucy lying motionless on the ground, paramedics working at breakneck speed, blood, too much blood, a torn uniform, and then suddenly a shrill tone, a flatline on the monitor, chest compressions. And then, miraculously, a faint heartbeat. And him, frozen, unable to move, unable to speak. Her body loaded into the ambulance, Grey snapping him back to reality, practically ordering him inside. His hand finding hers as the doors slammed shut.

And now, all that mattered was protecting her, not leaving her for even a second, and remembering : she was alive.

Chapter Text

Angela arrived a few minutes later and watched them for a few seconds. As if he had a sixth sense, Tim lifted his head and looked in her direction. A nod, and a silent conversation began. Then slowly, so as not to startle her, Tim detached himself from Lucy, wiped the remaining tears from her face, and looked at her.

“Come on, I’ll take you back to the station.”

Lucy nodded, unaware of reality but conscious of the past. She let herself be guided to the shop; Tim opened the passenger door for her and let her settle in.

“I’ll be right back, you’re safe, okay?”

“Mm.”

The door closed, and as Tim walked away, Miles took a position in front of the vehicle, as if, for a moment, he were a human shield. Tim stopped next to Angela.

“How are you?”

“Fine.”

“Tim…”

“You want me to say what?”

“That you’re holding it together because she’s not okay, and you’re not okay. And that you just relived the scene.”

“Maybe. I should never have agreed to let her come.”

“The odds were tiny…”

“And yet…”

“Take her home, but Tim?”

“I know…”

He thanked her silently and returned to the car.

“Boot, get in the car.”

Miles didn’t argue or ask questions and sat in the back. He was far too aware of the heaviness of the moment, the tension, the sorrow, the fear. He wished he could do more, but the truth was blunt: aside from doing his job, there was nothing more he could do.

The car parked in front of the police station. Tim turned around, and Miles silently understood that his place was no longer there. A few seconds later, it was just the two of them in the vehicle.

“I’m sorry.”

Lucy turned her head toward him, unsure of what to say, and intertwined their fingers.

“Let me go see Grey, and then we’ll go home.”

They entered the building, Tim guiding Lucy to a spot not far from his line of sight before heading to Grey’s office.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Lost in her poor memories, in the images that kept replaying, Lucy didn’t immediately notice the person who had stopped in front of her.

“Lucy?”

She lifted her head, studying the man, a mystery.

“It’s me, Chris…”

But Lucy didn’t know any Chris.

“I heard about your accident. Back on the field?”

“No. I… I’m sorry, but who are you?”

And apparently Chris had no idea about the whole story.

“Lucy, come on…”

“Listen, I don’t know you, and this is absolutely not the time to…”

“Incredible…” he interrupted her. “Incredible, it wasn’t enough to break up with me out of the blue, even less enough to jump into his arms just as quickly, and now you’re playing the forget-me card? I thought you were more mature than that…”

“I…”

“Forget it… I don’t have time to waste anymore.”

And Chris disappeared as quickly as he had appeared, leaving Lucy sitting there, lost after this conversation, these revelations thrown at her like that.

“Luce?”

She lifted her head. He was there in front of her.

“Who is Chris?”

Tim was troubled by this question, coming out of nowhere, and even more so by the subject.

“Your ex, why?”

“Because he came to talk to me…”

“Chris was there?”

“Mm-hm.”

And it was stronger than him; even though she had left Chris to be with him, Tim couldn’t help but feel a pang in his heart. Chris had been off the radar for a long time, and now he had to reappear, today of all days.

“I left him for you?”

“Yes, why?”

“He said something like that. He thinks I didn’t recognize him on purpose…”

“Excuse me ?”

“‘Now you’re playing the forget-me card? I thought you were more mature than that…’ Isn’t that clear enough?”

“Where is he?”

“No, Tim, forget it. Better get used to these kinds of remarks. It’s fine.”

He looked for a few seconds and gave up the urge to go and tell that idiot off. He wasn’t worth it.

“I’ll change, and then we go home?”

“But you haven’t finished your day…”

“Some things are more important.”

“Like?”

“You.” He answered, disappearing into the hallway.

And Lucy would be lying if she said her heart didn’t skip a beat at that precise moment.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

The rest of the day was rather quiet. Lucy enjoyed Kojo on the couch, sitting next to Tim, absorbed in his game. And finally, the mere presence of the other was enough. That evening, after pizza and a movie, they each went to their own room, their own bed.

Tim woke up around two in the morning. Wanting to get a glass of water, he noticed light under Lucy’s door. He knocked lightly and entered. She was sitting in the middle of the bed, her eyes swollen from crying.

He approached, sat beside her, and held her in his arms, just as he had earlier in the day.

“I wish I could remember our wedding and not this…” she murmured.

“I know…”

“And the more I looked at that street, the more I relived that day. I felt the pain, remembered the sounds, the smells, the cold of the ground. It felt like reliving it.”

“Me too…”

Lucy slowly pulled away to look at him, encouraging him to speak. She was so...Lucy at that moment.

“I might have put aside everything I saw and felt that day. And being back on that street, everything came back. Everything. Images I wished to forget.”

“Tim…”

“I thought I had lost you that day, and when the paramedic started CPR, I thought you’d never wake up. I was incapable of anything. And when the heartbeat appeared again on the machine… I…”

And since her release from the hospital, it was the first time she had seen him cry. Silently cry. As if he had forbidden himself from doing so. As if he had to be strong to bear everything. And it broke her heart.

Lucy leaned back slightly and decided to straddle him, sitting face-to-face. She placed her arms on either side of his neck before holding him close. Instinctively, Tim wrapped his arms around her waist and tightened their embrace.

“I’ve got you… I’m here, I’m alive, lost, but alive… Sorry…” she whispered into his ear.

And then, as she had done so many times before, she buried her head in his neck, enjoying his warmth, the closeness. Carried by a sudden impulse, she timidly and tenderly kissed the hollow between his neck and shoulder before pressing herself even closer. Tim, lost track of time, allowed himself, for once, to be vulnerable. He didn’t need much, just her and she was there.

Chapter Text

Lucy was sitting in the therapist’s waiting room. She was nervous. And yet, she wasn’t expecting much from this appointment, no miraculous return of her memory, no magic cure to stop the nightmare that had haunted her every night for the past three days. No, she simply needed to clear her head, to unburden her heart, to speak to a complete stranger. Tim had dropped her off on his way to work, Lucy promising she would find her own way home.

“Lucy Bradford?”

Honestly, Lucy only lifted her head when she heard her first name; her mind still hadn’t registered that she was no longer a Chen, but a Bradford. She took a deep breath and walked into the office. The therapist gestured for her to sit in the armchair by the window and then settled into his own chair across from her.

“Lucy, why are you here today?”

“I’ve lost my memory.”

“All right. May I ask how?”

“I’m a sergeant with the LAPD. I was injured in the field, badly. I spent a few days in a coma. When I woke up, I had forgotten everything, or rather, my memory had stopped back when I was still at the academy. That day I learned I was married, that I was a sergeant, that I had built an entire life I had no memory of.”

“Is your husband still with you?”

“Yes. He brought me home, our home, though it feels strange to call it that. He takes care of me the best he can, and he does it very well. Some memories have come back, often without me even realizing it. Until three days ago.”

“What happened three days ago?”

“I asked to go with Tim on the field.”

“Tim, that’s your husband?”

“Yes. They got a call about a fight outside a store, just a few streets from where I was attacked. I saw the street and… and I remembered. Everything. Every detail. And since then, it haunts me every time I close my eyes. And it wasn’t just flashes, no. I remembered the sounds, the pain, the cold pavement…”

“And what happened then?”

“I collapsed. Tim was there. He took me home. I avoided the subject. Until he came to me in the middle of the night, and we finally talked. He admitted it had been hard for him too, and he shared what he had felt that day. And it broke my heart.”

“Why?”

“Because… it’s complicated.”

“Tell me.”

“He could have left, run away. He could have let me deal with all this on my own. But he stayed. And I know how hard it is for him to live through all of this. To have to relive the day it all happened. I wish I remembered our wedding. These past three weeks, the more time passes, the more I understand why I married him. And everything feels tangled. I feel safe with him, I feel cared for, I feel… loved. And inside me, everything stirs. I feel like a teenager when I’m next to him, when I look at him, when he looks at me… but I’ve forgotten everything about him, about us. I feel like I’m… falling… you know…”

“In love?”

“Yes…”

“And would that be a problem?”

“I don’t think so… I don’t know. What if he doesn’t feel the same?”

“Lucy, look at me. I can’t speak for him, but a man who stays after an accident that erased him from his wife’s memory usually doesn’t stay because he has no choice. He stays because he chooses to. Now, tell me a bit about you two.”

“Oh, um, we each have our own bedroom. We share meals, movies… he makes sure I have everything I need.”

“Why separate bedrooms?”

“I panicked when we first came home from the hospital…”

“I see. So you set natural boundaries?”

“Yes, but…”

“But?”

“I may have crossed some of them.”

“In what way?”

“I joined him in his bed to sleep next to him… and in the shower. I felt lonely, I needed closeness.”

“You needed him?”

“Yes.”

“And how did he react?”

“He was there. Just there. And everything made sense.”

“Lucy, sometimes the body, the heart remembers when the mind is temporarily unavailable. Deep down your heart knows you can turn to Tim, that he is the one who will give you what you need. Little by little, you are finding your way back to him, and falling in love with him a second time is only the natural course of things. Trust yourself. Trust him.”

“And what if it’s not enough? What if my memory never comes back?”

“Sometimes memory takes time. Sometimes it comes back piece by piece, or one morning, all at once. And yes, sometimes some things never return. But don’t be too hard on yourself. You are still healing. Sometimes you’ll need a trigger to remember, like with your accident. But nothing is lost. In the meantime, accept what comes, and let yourself enjoy falling in love with your husband again.”

“I just want to take control of my life again, to go back to work, to find who I was, even though I have no idea who that person is.”

“Lucy, you do have control over your life. It may be fragile, but it’s yours. Do you need something to help you sleep?”

“Yes, but something light.”

“Are you currently on any medication?”

“Yes, painkillers… and medication for PTSD I don’t even remember being prescribed.”

After checking that the medications worked together, Lucy left the office with another appointment scheduled for the following week. When she stepped outside, she was surprised to find someone waiting for her.

“Tamara?”

“Lucy…”

“What are you doing here?”

“Tim…”

“Oh.”

“He asked me if I could drive you home. But… maybe we could get a coffee first?”

Lucy hesitated for a few seconds, then looked at the young woman standing before her. Maybe it was time to live a little, instead of being shut away within four walls with only Kojo for company.

“With pleasure…”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tamara drove them to the café where they used to meet. The ride was quiet, filled only with music Lucy seemed to enjoy. Sitting across from one another, Lucy studied Tamara with great curiosity.

“What?”

“Nothing. Just… déjà vu,” Lucy admitted.

“We used to come here all the time.”

“Really?”

“Yes. This was kind of our spot.”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For this. I know it’s not easy for you, for anyone. For me to forget…”

“Hey, Lucy. It’s going to be okay.”

“I hope so…”

Their conversation flowed naturally. Of course, Lucy asked countless questions, about Tamara's life, her studies, her apartment, the things they used to do together. And Tamara answered each one, with photos and videos to show. For a moment, Lucy seemed to forget that she had forgotten, and simply enjoyed the present.

“I think that day Tim could have left us on the side of the road…”

“I don’t even dare to imagine—”

Lucy was cut off by the ringing of her phone.

“Hello?”

“Lucy Bradford?”

“Yes? Who’s speaking?”

“Nurse Richard, St. Stephen’s Hospital. Tim Bradford has been brought into the ER. You’re his medical proxy—we need you here. He’s currently being treated by our team.”

“I… Yes… I’ll be right there.”

Her hands shook as she hung up.

“Lucy? What is it?”

“Tim’s at the hospital.”

“I’ll drive.”

In the car, Lucy stared blankly out the window. Her body skipped a beat, her breath caught for a few seconds. Tim was in the hospital. He could be fighting for his life. She didn’t know. Tears welled up, unstoppable, streaming silently down her face. Tamara placed her hand gently over Lucy’s, reminding her she wasn’t alone.

Chapter Text

After checking in at the nurses’ station, Lucy headed toward the designated waiting room. She walked down a long corridor, following the arrows, the weight of the situation pressing on her more and more. For a brief moment, she almost regretted asking Tamara not to come with her.

When she entered the room, she came face to face with almost-familiar faces. They all looked at her, but her eyes locked onto only one face: Miles’. His uniform was stained with blood, Tim’s blood. The exchange between them was intense, plunging the room into an almost chilling silence.

“Lucy?”

Her eyes briefly shifted to Angela, standing at her side. But she couldn’t help herself, just seconds later, her gaze returned to Miles. She took the few steps that separated them until she stood right in front of him.

“How?” she asked.

Miles quickly glanced toward Angela, seeking permission to answer. She nodded, and his eyes returned to Lucy’s. He hesitated for a moment, unsure whether to stand, aware of their difference in height.

“A traffic stop gone wrong. The man pulled a gun, fired, and fled. Sergeant Bradford went down, and I…”

“…Family for Bradford?”

Miles was interrupted by the surgeon. Lucy nervously moved in his direction.

“I’m his wife.”

“The surgery went well. He’s in recovery; you’ll be able to see him in about an hour. The first aid given on-site played a critical role… A nurse will come get you. We’ll discuss the post-op care later.”

After thanking the surgeon, Lucy turned back toward Miles, who was now standing.

“You saved his life…”

“I did what I had to do.”

“You saved his life…” she repeated again before pulling him into her arms. “Thank you.”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Everyone decided to wait with Lucy, in a comforting silence, Lucy seated between Angela and Miles.

“We’ll have something in common now,” she murmured, nudging Miles lightly with her shoulder. “You and I both saved his life out there.”

The others looked at her but said nothing. It wasn’t the time, nor the place. They simply watched, exchanging quick glances, witnesses to a fragment of memory resurfacing.

“Mrs. Bradford?”

Lucy lifted her head, still not quite used to being called that, and followed the nurse. The hallways felt familiar, maybe a little too familiar.

“Here’s his room. He’s awake, but groggy. It’s possible he’ll drift in and out of sleep regularly, don’t worry, it’s normal, just the anesthesia wearing off. If you need anything at all, or have questions, don’t hesitate!”

“Thank you.”

Lucy knocked softly on the door before entering. The room was dim, the heart monitor beside the bed recording each beat, two IV lines hanging overhead. She set her bag on the table near the entrance and walked to the bed. Tim was asleep. Lucy pulled a chair closer and sat at his side.

She was relieved, relieved to know he was alive, to see the beats of his heart on the screen, to watch his chest rise with each breath. Lucy had been afraid. Afraid of losing him. She had no rational explanation for that fear, except that she was in love with him. And she wouldn’t trade that feeling for anything in the world.

She feared not regaining her memories, not recovering her past, and having to rebuild everything from scratch. But if rebuilding her life from the beginning meant falling in love with a man like him, she was ready to start over. Ready to rebuild everything she had lost, for him. And it felt strange. This feeling was strange. Was this what it meant to love someone to the point of madness?

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

When Tim opened his eyes a few minutes later, he wasn’t surprised to find Lucy at his side. In fact, he was relieved that it was her, and not someone else. She seemed lost in thought, and for a selfish instant, he simply watched her. He was impressed. Impressed by the strength she carried within her. Day after day she pressed on, blindly holding onto the tiniest fragments of memory she stumbled across. She didn’t have to be sitting there, not because she didn’t care, but because she still wasn’t sure where she belonged. It was a conversation they’d had countless times: her place in the world, her place in his world, in their world.

“Hey,” he said, swallowing with difficulty.

“Hey…” she replied, turning her gaze toward him.

And they looked at each other, intensely, for a few seconds, as if to say all the things they didn’t dare to say aloud.

“You think we’re cursed?” she asked. “You and me…”

“Lucy…”

“I know… it’s part of the job. But…”

“But?”

“Today, I was scared. When my phone rang, when I saw Miles covered in blood… I was really, really scared.”

“Come here.”

Tim held out his hand, inviting her onto the bed. Lucy hesitated for a few seconds, then stood and joined him. She placed her hand in his and looked at him, tears threatening to fall at any moment.

“I’m sorry,” he said, caressing the inside of her wrist with his thumb. “But I’m okay. I’m here. I’m okay.”

“It’s just… a lot, emotionally.”

“I know. But look at the bright side, I’ll have to stay home for a while. With you.”

“And Kojo.”

“And Kojo…”

Silence fell again, their hands still linked.

“I’m in love with you.”

The words were out. She had to say them. He had to know.

“And I don’t know how to handle all of this. My memory loss, the fragments that come and go. I don’t know who I am anymore, I don’t know where I’m going. And yet, this is the one thing I’ve been sure of lately. I know that if we got married, it was because we loved each other but I forgot that too. And still, day after day, I’ve fallen in love with you. I know I should say fallen again, but it feels like I’m discovering love for the first time, just by being near you. It’s scary but it feels so natural.”

Tim gazed at her intently, a shy smile on his lips. And if he wanted to hide how fast his heart was beating, the monitor betrayed him instantly.

“There hasn’t been a single second I stopped loving you, Luce. Not one. And I probably never will.”

Now it was her turn to smile, almost foolishly, tears betraying the depth of her emotions in that moment. Tim let go of her hand and gently wiped the tears from her face.

“And I know how complicated this is for you. But we’ll take the time we need for you to heal, for us to find each other again. Okay?”

Lucy was about to answer when knocks on the door and the nurse’s arrival interrupted her.

“I’m sorry, visiting hours are over…”

Tim nodded toward her, and the nurse slipped away, leaving them the privacy they needed to say goodbye.

“Go home, get some rest, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Mm. You rest too…”

Lucy climbed off the bed and pushed the chair back into place before quickly returning to his side. She hesitated for just a moment, then, without thinking further, leaned down and pressed a quick, timid kiss to his lips.

She straightened just as quickly. Both swept away by the moment, Tim was once again betrayed by the heart monitor, which made Lucy laugh softly for a few seconds. She stepped back, grabbed her bag, and before closing the door behind her, turned back one last time.

“See you tomorrow…”

“See you tomorrow…”

Lucy wandered through the hallways toward the exit, fingers brushing against her lips. Her heart felt a little lighter than when she had arrived. As the hospital doors slid open, Miles was there, sitting on a bench.

“What are you doing here?”

“I just wanted to make sure you got home safely. Can I give you a ride?”

“Yes… with pleasure.”

A few minutes into the drive, Lucy turned her head toward Miles.

“He’s alive partly thanks to you…”

“Ma’am, I…”

“No, listen to me. Without you, he might not be here, or he might be in far worse shape. But he’s okay. He’s alive. You’re a good man, Miles. Professionally, you still have much to learn, but as a human being, you already have everything it takes. Thank you for doing everything you could to save the man I love.”

Miles nodded, not sure what to say, aware of the weight of her words. He pulled up in front of Tim’s house a few minutes later.

“Thank you, Miles. Go get some rest.”

“And if you need anything…”

“I know… Thank you.”

Lucy closed the door behind her and waited until the car disappeared from sight before going inside. She entered the alarm code, then sank onto the couch, Kojo at her heels. Tim was alive and that was all that mattered.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

Two weeks later.

When Tim opened his eyes that morning, the spot next to him was empty.

Every night was different. Every morning as well. Sometimes he fell asleep alone and woke up with her by his side, or fell asleep next to her and woke much earlier, leaving her to sleep in his sheets. And sometimes, two doors and a hallway separated them. Yet the night before, she had fallen asleep against him, after yet another long conversation. The sheets were cold, abandoned long ago, and the door was left slightly ajar.

Tim took a few seconds to clear his head before getting up and heading toward the kitchen. She was there, her back to him, unaware of his gaze as she poured herself some coffee.

“Morning…” he mumbled, his voice still heavy with sleep.

Lucy jumped slightly and turned around.

“Morning, coffee?”

Tim nodded and sat at the counter, Lucy joining him quickly with two mugs in hand. Their mornings were silent, but neither of them minded, both appreciating the comfort of that silence and the presence of the other.

Today maybe more than any other.

Tim was going back to work. So, just like before his accident, he got up, placed his mug in the dishwasher, and went to get ready. Thirty minutes later, as he came back through the kitchen, he stopped in front of Lucy and pulled her into his arms, just like before her accident.

“See you tonight?”

“Yes… be careful.”

“ Always am ”

This time, he didn’t hesitate before pressing a kiss to the top of her head, then pulling away. One last look before he closed the door. Lucy was overwhelmed by the silence.

A silence and solitude she had forgotten for the past two weeks.

“Come on, Kojo, let’s go clear our heads.”

They wandered through the neighborhood, Lucy lost in her thoughts, sometimes passing the same street twice, the same houses, before finally heading back home. Settling onto the couch, it took her a few minutes to notice Kojo sitting across from her, his eyes fixed on her.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that…” she muttered. “I’m going to go crazy if I don’t do something, if I stay locked up in these four walls. I need to take back my life, to do something. What’s stopping me? Nothing, right? Nothing.”

She started gently stroking his head, and he was more than happy with the attention. Then, as if a bolt of lightning ran through her, Lucy stood up and headed for the door.

“I’ll be back, Kojo,” she said before slamming it behind her.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tim was surprised to see Lucy sitting in Grey’s office when he got back from patrol. He checked his phone : nothing. He turned his head and met Angela’s eyes; she only shrugged, fully aware of the question on his face but without an answer. Minutes passed, and she was still there, sitting seriously in that glass-walled office. Then the meeting ended, and the door opened.

“Everything okay?” he asked as he walked up to her.

“Yes…”

“What did Grey want?”

“Oh, actually, I was the one who needed to talk to him… Come.”

Surprised, Tim followed Lucy into the break room, letting her close the door behind them.

“What’s going on?”

“Um… When I was alone this morning, I thought a lot. Tim, I’ve lost count of the weeks since my accident, but time is dragging on. Most of the time my memories are still missing, but I’m going crazy being stuck in those four walls. And yes, I know, I can go out, I’m not a prisoner. But to do what? Nothing more than at home. So, I came here to ask Grey to give me back my position. I’m ready.”

Tim’s heart skipped a beat.

“Sorry?”

“I asked Grey to give me my job back.”

“Lucy, I…”

“Tim, I need to do something with my life, not just be who I am now…”

“Lucy, listen… Maybe it’s still a little too soon, don’t you think?”

“Excuse me? You don’t think I’m capable?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“But that’s what you think.”

“No. What I think is.. you said it yourself : your memories are still gone. Your training, everything that makes you a cop, a sergeant, isn’t back yet, and you want to go back on the field?”

“Yes.”

“That’s…”

“That’s what?” she said, sharper than she meant to.

“Irresponsible.”

The silence that followed was heavy. Both of them staring, very aware of the word he had used.

“So what then? I should stay stuck in a life that isn’t mine, being the good wife who waits for her husband to come home from work?”

“Again, that’s not what I said.”

“BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE IT!” she shouted. “I refuse. I thought you’d support me in my choice, that you’d help me, that… I don’t know what I thought. That you’d believe in me more than Lieutenant Grey. But apparently, I was wrong.”

“Lucy…”

“No,” she said, raising her hand toward him. “I need some air.”

Lucy opened the door and left before her tears could fall, leaving Tim standing in the middle of the room.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tim took a deep breath before stepping out of his car and walking toward the entrance of their home. The day had been silent. No call, no text, no response. Nothing. And he hated himself for it. He wished he had told her he trusted her, believed in her, supported her : but fear had taken over. He had almost lost her once; he wasn’t ready, not yet.

When he opened the door, he wasn’t surprised to find a silent house, an empty living room, a dark kitchen. He removed his shoes and walked out into the yard. Lucy was sitting with a book in hand, Kojo stretched at her feet.

Tim walked over and sat beside her, but Lucy didn’t lift her head, her eyes racing across the page. Gently, Tim laid a hand on hers and closed the book, forcing her to look up.

“Lucy…” he began. “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you I trusted you, that I believed in you, that I supported you, but… I was scared. Just the thought of you out there without your memory, your training, it pushed me to react the wrong way. I want you to get your life back, I want all of that but it doesn’t erase the fear. The first time I brought you back to life, I promised myself it would never happen again. And then, years later, I was standing over your lifeless body again. I trust you, your judgment, it’s the others I don’t trust. And knowing you could be sitting in a patrol car with anyone else, I…”

“The condition was that I’d patrol with you, Tim.”

“What do you mean?”

“When I went to Grey, when I asked for my badge and my gun back, I had one condition : that I’d patrol with you. Because I trust you. I know you wouldn’t have let anything slide with me, not when it came to my safety. I don’t remember my training, but I watched you with Miles. I’m not reckless, of course we would’ve gone over the basics together, gone to the shooting range every night… I had everything planned. But you reacted…”

“…Like an idiot,” he cut her off.

“No, like someone who was scared. And I reacted…”

“…The way you should have.”

“No, I got angry. I took it too personally instead of asking why… I’m sorry.”

Tim looked at her for a long moment before wiping away the tears rolling down her cheeks with his thumb.

“Do you… still want to go out tonight?” he whispered.

“If you still want to…”

“Of course I do…”

“I’ll go change quickly, then we can leave.”

“No need, you look perfect already.”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

Tim hadn’t needed to make a reservation. He decided to take her back to where they had their second date, hoping maybe it would spark a memory. Like the first time, they sat side by side. The conversation was light at first, and then Tim dared to ask what her real plan was for returning to the field. She explained everything, from A to Z, and together they decided what would be the simplest, most effective way for her. Soon, the topic shifted, and just like the first time, Lucy mentioned their future grandchildren. One subject led to another, and they found themselves sharing more and more without even realizing it. As the minutes passed, their bodies grew closer, drawn to each other. Without thinking, Tim’s hand rested on her thigh, occasionally brushing the fabric of her jeans, while Lucy shyly played with the edge of his shirt.

When they headed back to the car, Tim grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together. And this time, it wasn’t for reassurance. It was intimate, a way to show the world she was his, just like before. The drive home was quiet, each stealing glances, smiles, or brushing thumbs over their joined hands resting on the console.

Tim unlocked the door, Lucy entered the alarm code. They both headed to their rooms, Lucy snagging the bathroom first. When Tim finished his shower, he found her in the kitchen, sitting on the counter, finishing her medication. He stopped in front of her.

It only took a look, a breath, a skipped heartbeat, a shiver. Lucy set her glass aside, reached forward, grabbed a fistful of his T-shirt, and pulled him close.

A racing heart.

A hesitation almost nonexistent.

Her gaze flicked quickly from his lips to his eyes. The intensity in his stare was the breaking point. Lucy leaned forward until her lips met his. Timidly.

She made the first move, letting Tim decide whether to accept the dance. She was surprised when it only took him a few seconds to respond. Lucy slipped both arms around his neck, fingers brushing the back of his head. Tim pressed closer, bodies flush, his hands resting on her thighs before sliding gently up her waist, her arms. And only when his tongue passed the barrier of her lips did he stop holding back, his hands framing her face as if she were the most precious thing in the world.

They kissed for long minutes, losing themselves in each other. Filling a void. Smiling between kisses like teenagers. And then, tenderly, slowly, as if afraid to wake from a dream, they pulled apart.

“How about we go to bed?” she murmured against his lips.

Tim nodded, helped her down, turned off the light, and followed her. But it wasn’t toward Tim’s room she went, it was hers, theirs. They slipped under the covers, lights off. Lucy moved closer, wrapping her arm and leg around him, pressing one last kiss to his lips.

“Goodnight, Tim.”

“Goodnight, Babe.”

That night they hadn’t needed anything more, already writing the new chapter of their life together.

Chapter Text

Tim and Lucy had spent a long time talking together about the terms of her return. Tim had only demanded two things: that Lucy practice at the shooting range before walking the streets of Los Angeles with a loaded gun on her hip, and that she start driving again.

So he had taken a day off, giving Lucy the whole day to get back behind the wheel, driving aimlessly through the streets of Los Angeles before heading to the shooting range. And even though he still wasn’t entirely comfortable with the idea, he had decided to trust her.

Getting back to driving was probably the easiest activity. What was harder, however, was regaining her instincts, having her eyes everywhere, being able to focus on multiple tasks at once while staying sharp every single second.

“How many people were waiting at the crosswalk?”

“Sorry?”

“How many people were waiting at the crosswalk, Lucy?”

“Um… I…”

“You have to be able to drive and notice everything going on around you. You’re never safe from anything. You need to stay alert to everything. Cops’ eyes… never forget that.”

Lucy nodded. The exercise suddenly felt much more difficult. How could she focus on the road and still keep an eye on her surroundings?

Tim hesitated for a moment. Should he add another layer of difficulty today? Should he ask her to navigate the streets on her own? Questions spun through his head, pulling him away from the moment.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked suddenly.

“About your return…” he began. “About how to keep you safe. It feels like I’m your TO all over again. Except I’m not the same man you faced when you were still a rookie. And I don’t know who I’m supposed to be now: a training officer, or your husband.”

“Whatever you choose, I trust you. I know you’ll make the right decision for me, for us, and for my future…”

“You’re not helping…”

“I know… And, there were three.”

“Three what?”

“There were three people at the crosswalk earlier.”

Tim didn’t answer. That was so typically Lucy, stubbornly pushing through until she found the solution. Like that time she made them wait in the car outside a crime scene she had accidentally compromised, hoping she could untangle things just by observing. Her determination had paid off that day.

“At the next intersection, turn left and pull over as soon as you can.”

“Okay… why?”

“You’re questioning an order now?”

“We’re the same rank, Tim…”

“Because I’m taking the wheel. We’re going to the range.”

“I can drive, you know…”

“I know…”

“Just admit you don’t like being the passenger princess.”

“Maybe…”

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

After a thirty-minute drive, Tim parked the car in the lot of a range far from downtown.

“Wait...”

Lucy cut him short, forcing him back into his seat and pulling his hand away from the handle.

“What is it?”

“What if I can’t shoot properly? What if I screw everything up?”

“Look at me. I get that you’re worried. But, Luce, if it takes hours, days, weeks : we’ll do it. You told me you trusted me. Believe me, I wouldn’t have brought you here if I thought it was impossible. Okay ?”

After one last look, Tim got out first, opened the trunk, and retrieved their guns. Lucy took a deep breath before stepping out herself.

Tim started with the basics: assembling, disassembling, cleaning, and reassembling her weapon, down to the smallest detail. “You need to know your weapon,” he repeated several times. It took her several tries before she finally succeeded once. Tim then decided to put on his instructor hat.

“Now close your eyes, disassemble and reassemble your gun.”

“With my eyes closed?”

“Don’t argue, just do it.”

Lucy closed her eyes, doubtful, but obeyed. It took her two tries before she got it right and was allowed to open her eyes again.

“Why?”

“Imagine one day you’re in the dark, or you need to stay hidden in total darkness, and you have to disassemble and reassemble your weapon for whatever reason…”

“Oh…”

“Ready to step up to a target?”

“I think so…”

Next, Tim explained the safety rules, the stakes, and the expectations. Lucy put on her headset and repeated the rules one by one, with the strange feeling she’d known them forever. She stood in front of her target, loaded her weapon, took a deep breath, and raised it toward the sheet of paper. She aimed carefully, her target: the torso. She concentrated, adjusted her stance several times, and finally pulled the trigger. Her body jerked slightly from the recoil. She looked at the target: miss. The daisy at the bottom of the stand, however, hadn’t survived.

“Damn it,” she muttered.

She reset her stance, took another deep breath, analyzed, and fired again. And again, until her magazine was empty. Lucy set her gun down, removed her headset, and studied the target. Not a single bullet had hit the outlined body.

Tim, who had been watching from behind, didn’t need to see her face to know Lucy was disappointed. And when she turned to meet his eyes, they confirmed it.

“This was a bad idea.”

Tim stepped closer.

“No, it wasn’t a bad idea. Now reload your magazine. We’re doing it again.”

“Tim…”

“Lucy, just do it.”

Once again, Lucy obeyed. She reloaded, put her headset back on, adjusted her stance, studied the target, and when she felt ready, she fired. The bullet hit the upper right corner of the paper. Lucy hated failing. She could thank her parents for that. The childhood trauma, hammered into her by both her mother and father, that she couldn’t fail, that she had to be among the best, always following the rules, still haunted her years later. That unhealthy conditioning, that life shaped for her when she hadn’t had the right to say no, had even pushed her into studies she hadn’t wanted to pursue, just to avoid disappointing them.

Eyes brimming with tears, Lucy loaded her weapon again and raised her arms toward the target. That’s when Tim stepped closer once more.

His chest pressed lightly against her back, his hands settled on her waist, shifting her stance, pressing her hips closer to him, grounding her feet into the floor for better support. Gently, Tim guided her left arm, nudging it a few centimeters, then slid his other hand down to her wrist, changing the angle, instantly giving her a better grip. His left hand moved her headset off one ear. Still pressed against him, Lucy could feel his breath at her neck.

“Inhale, exhale, clear your mind, let the weight of your lower body sink into your feet. Focus, lock your eyes on the center of the torso, lock your arms. When you’re ready :shoot. You can do this. Trust yourself.”

Tim slid her headset back into place and observed her every move, every look, every breath until determination took over. Lucy pulled the trigger, her arm’s recoil buffered by Tim’s nearness behind her. The bullet landed in the center of the torso. She breathed again, fired once more, same spot. She emptied her magazine, digging the hole deeper in the paper target, until the last bullet.

Lucy paused, studying her sheet, realizing she’d succeeded, catching her breath. And realizing that Tim hadn’t moved an inch, he was still there, pressed against her, hands braced on either side of the counter she herself leaned against. She set down her gun and headset, then turned around. Face-to-face, they looked at each other for several long seconds.

“I did it…”

All Lucy saw in Tim’s eyes was pride. Swept up in the moment, Tim brushed her cheek tenderly, then cradled her face with both hands. Their gaze lingered intense, soft, before Tim stopped thinking altogether and leaned in to finally kiss her. Surprised, Lucy clutched at his t-shirt as if afraid of losing her footing, letting him lead the dance. What began shyly in the first seconds quickly grew tender, deep, letting their bodies speak without words. Slowly, they pulled apart, Tim’s hands still cupping her face, Lucy still clutching his shirt.

“I’m proud of you,” he added, brushing her cheek once more.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

The day had been long and exhausting. Lucy wasn’t ready to patrol on her own yet but she was ready to get back in a vehicle with him.

After entering the alarm code and grabbing Kojo’s leash, the three of them headed out for their nightly walk around the neighborhood. But tonight, as she watched Tim throw a ball for Kojo in the park, Lucy couldn’t stop thinking about the way Tim had kissed her earlier. Up until now, all the intimacy they’d shared had been initiated by her. But this time, he had taken the lead. And everything he’d put into that kiss had completely turned her heart upside down, in the best way.

She felt silly, smiling so openly, so publicly, just because her husband had kissed her a few hours earlier. So this is what it felt like to be loved by this man?

She closed her eyes for a moment and, without realizing, began humming their wedding song. The song they had danced to in front of everyone, the song he had kissed her to, just as he had earlier today. She suddenly remembered that moment: the softness of his hands on her skin, the brush of his suit sleeves against her cheeks, and the looks from everyone after. Tim had always reserved that kind of intimacy for home, for the moments they shared just the two of them. And that night, he had broken that rule, kissing the love of his life as he never had before, in front of a crowd.

When she opened her eyes again, she realized : it was the first time since her accident that she remembered something about him, about them.

A few minutes later, they made their way back home. Tim keyed in the alarm code again, and Lucy closed the door behind them.

“I’m going to take a shower…” she told him, kissing his cheek quickly.

Halfway down the hallway, Lucy suddenly stopped, turned, and looked at him.

“Aren’t you coming?”

Unable to answer, Tim simply followed Lucy down the hall, the same smile she wore mirrored on his own lips, as the bathroom door closed slowly behind them.

Chapter Text

Lucy was standing in the shower, fighting an unnamed battle between her heart and her mind. Questions firing by the hundreds:

Had he understood what she wanted? Was she really ready? Was he ready? Why had she asked him to join her? What was going to happen? Why the shower? Why now and not yesterday or tomorrow? What if she had forgotten? What if he was disappointed? What if, in the end, he didn’t come into the shower? And what if he did? Why was she still alone in such a small space? Why was he still on the other side? Should she tell him she was waiting? Should she let him come? Had he left the bathroom? And what if, in the middle of all this, she didn’t want it anymore? And what if it was him? Should she tell him she wanted it desperately? Should she tell him she was afraid? What if he was doing all of this just to please her but didn’t want to? Where should they start? What did he like? What did they like? What if…

Then Tim stepped into the shower, behind her, without a word, his heart and mind just as shaken as hers:

Had he understood? Should he ask for her consent? Did he even have the right to stand naked behind her without truly knowing if this was what she wanted? Should he speak to her before anything else? Were they going to find each other, or lose each other?

And finally, pushed by a courage she didn’t think she had, by a desire to go further, by a devouring curiosity, Lucy slowly backed up, preparing for the impact of their two bodies until her back met his chest. Neither of them moved, selfishly savoring the pleasant shock that ran deep within them, their hearts skipping not one but several beats, the sweetness of this reunion, as if they were destined to be one, as simply as in this present moment.

And, like hundreds of times before, Tim wrapped his arms around her, bringing them even closer but still leaving her the time and the choice to tell him no, to push him away, to ask him to leave. But when Lucy laid her hands over his, grasping his wrists, guiding them slowly over her skin to rest them on her chest, the questions vanished.

The pleasure was instant as his hands, his fingers played with her breasts, caressing them gently, slowly, and Lucy let her head fall back, leaning against him. It only took Tim a few seconds to kiss the hollow of her neck, multiplying the pleasure. One of his hands slipped away and began to descend, caressing every millimeter of her skin until his fingers stopped a few centimeters from the barrier he had mentally drawn.

Lucy let her hand slide down his arm, granting him permission to go lower, to continue. Their hands intertwined, descending together, pausing for a few seconds to catch their breath, Tim remembering all those times he had given her pleasure, all those times she hadn’t needed to show him the way. And strangely, letting her guide his hand where she needed him excited him even more; he found it terribly sexy.

“Tim…”

That was all it took, his name, whispered in ragged breaths, for him to free his hand from hers and apply that pressure she loved so much, to explore that part of her body he loved so much. Each of her moans pushed him to explore further, and the more he explored, the stronger and more present her moans became. His body didn’t stay indifferent to the closeness, to that melody he knew by heart, and when he wrapped his other arm around her waist to pull her tighter against him, greedy to feel her even closer, he was aroused, deliciously betrayed by his own body, trapped between their two bodies. And when Lucy realized, felt it, her moan grew louder; she hooked her hand behind his neck, her fingers stroking his skin in time with Tim’s rhythm.

And when his fingers slid inside her, Lucy lost her footing.

“Oh…”

Both her hands clutched what they already held. Lucy wasn’t thinking anymore : she was feeling. It was magical, it was perfect, it was good, too good to be true. She felt like she was discovering herself, being reborn; she could have exploded at any second. She needed more, wanted more. But more than anything, she needed to see him, to kiss him, to lose herself in the hollow of his neck. More, she needed more.

And suddenly, she pulled away from him and turned almost as quickly, breaking that connection. Her eyes locked onto his. It took her only a few seconds to reach his lips and kiss him. It was tender, soft and then desire took over as Tim took over, making the kiss even more erotic than it already was. He guided her, pressing her back against the wall, the water surrounding them, his body pressed to hers, his mouth leaving her lips to travel down her neck, to her chest, before coming back up to kiss her even more fervently, lovingly. When his hand tried to resume where it had stopped, Lucy stopped him, looking straight into his eyes.

“More…”

He lifted her gently, letting her wrap her legs around his hips, her arms around his neck, his hand bracing against the wall for some semblance of stability. Lucy kissed him once, then twice, before he entered her, slowly. Her mouth formed an “o” against his lips. They stayed still for a few seconds before Lucy kissed him again and Tim began to move.

Explosive. It was explosive, this devouring pleasure. Each thrust was different, delicious, unique, slow, as if to savor it a thousand times more. Every movement of his hips, every moan, every caress, every kiss, every look was a declaration, a declaration of love. Words were useless and certainly not strong enough anymore. The softness of her skin, of her curves, her breath.

And their heartbeats.

Their hearts could have exploded from love and passion.

And then there was that final thrust, the one that made them see stars, that left them mute against each other. And then nothing, only the sound of water and their breathing. Lucy pressed even closer to Tim, resting her forehead on his shoulder, kissing his skin softly.

“I love you,” she murmured.

Tim felt his heart race. Hearing those words again, that confession, was perhaps what he had missed the most. And when she lifted her head to look at him, he took the time to really see her. She was beautiful. He kissed her tenderly.

“I love you,” he murmured back, his lips still against hers.

⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪ · ⬪

When Tim joined her later in bed, after turning off the lights, he didn’t need to think. He lay down behind her, wrapping his arms around her before placing a kiss on the top of her head. He stayed with his face buried in her hair for a few seconds and began to gently stroke the skin of her stomach.

“I remembered something today.”

“Mm?”

“Our wedding song, that dance, and the way you kissed me for the first time in front of everyone.”

“Oh…”

“Yes… and I could relive that moment forever if it were possible.”

“Really?”

“Really…”

Lucy turned so they were face to face. She placed a hand on his face before continuing.

“I’m not afraid of forgetting anymore. Do you know why?”

“Tell me…”

“Because I have you.”

She didn’t give him time to respond. Lucy pressed her lips to his.

“Good night, my love.”

“Good night, Lucy. I love you.”

In the dark, under the sheets, Lucy found his hand and clumsily drew a little heart on it with her finger, just as she had done so many times weeks before. Tim’s heart skipped a beat once more. It was their way of saying I love you when they were on duty, quickly in a hallway before each went to patrol their district. No one knew, no one but them.