Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Unwanted emotions don’t knock before entering into your life, it slips in through  the small sill under the door. Quickly, quietly, and before you know it you can’t get out of bed, can’t shower, can’t do anything without feeling the motivation drain from you.

 Emotions don’t ask you what type of tea you want before forcing you to sit with it, it doesn’t ask anything really. It’s like that awkward silence between you and an old friend that you can’t seem to fill with words. Even so, words don’t mean anything to emotions, most people can’t even describe what the emotion they are sitting with looks like. But only they can only feel the tension it’s creating. 

…What if you had the ability to physically absorb that tension from someone? What if you take on what they are bearing? If you had the chance would you lift someone’s pains into your arms? Even if your body can’t physically handle taking in everyone’s emotions would you do it? 

…

You don’t have a choice.

You, Y/N cookie, were made by accident. A simple mistake and yet the only one who it seems to negatively affect is you. I guess it’s just how the cookie crumbles (literally). You were made by a cookie who just so happened to have a large enough chunk of their dough be ripped off by some type of cake hound to create you. 

As you know cookies reproduce asexually using a method called budding. So that chunk that was ripped off was just enough for you to be created. 

You were a pretty small cookie, only around 4 weeks old when Elder Faerie found you a small puddle of a substance that can only be described as a black gooey liquid just by your right hand. 

None the less he took you in. He found quickly that he couldn’t physically touch you or you would start sobbing.. maybe it was more like screaming but whatever you were doing was obviously out of discomfort..? 

The high pitched screams always sounded like you were in pain. Although the cries of small children would normally annoy Elder Faerie he didn’t seem upset or annoyed at your cries. He brushed off thinking it was you just being a normal baby before he had given you a bath to be rid of the black substance on your body. (Don’t take this weirdly he’s not a pedo plus cookies don’t have genitals)

When he did you stopped crying.. but that wasn’t the strangest part. The water once crystal clear ready for use had started to turn into the same gooey black substance he had found you in.

In panic Elder faerie took you out of the bath but you just started sobbing again.. His panic disappeared the second he had you in his arms. He tried to get you to stop crying but to no avail. 

Hours passed since you had started crying but you just wouldn’t stop. And miraculously Elder Faerie couldn’t bring himself to be upset at this..? It was almost as if all of the stress he had been suppressing had been lifted off of his shoulders.

Was this.. your doing?

…

Chapter Text

As time passed you were expected to follow Elder Faerie’s footsteps, expected to care for the faeries like he did. With that in mind you were to make them happy to the best of your abilities. No question about it, you HAD to do this, it was EXPECTED of you. But your magic didn’t make this task any easier than it originally was, if anything it made it worse.

It was easier to say what your magic couldn’t do rather than what it can. It was complicated but there was only one power that truly stuck out to everyone. The ability to absorb negative emotions and turn them into this black substance.

…

Well they only cared about how you can absorb negative emotions but like at least they cared. To them you were like the drug addiction that would keep them grounded, keep them from falling apart, they shouldn’t rely on you but they did.

Every time they felt negative emotions they would run straight to you demanding you cure them at once. To them you were merely something to cure their mental pains, a new antidepressant. Although your magic only works for about 10 minutes to 5 hours at most so you were always surrounded by people.

Unsurprisingly, you were always overwhelmed, this made you feel the need to hide, to run, to be anywhere but there. Setting boundaries with these types of people was like telling your entitled sister she couldn’t wear white at your wedding. So hiding was probably the best option for you.

Maybe it was selfish but what those stupid little nincompoops couldn’t comprehend was that everytime you take someone's pain it physically hurts you. Your body has to get rid of the unneeded waste that is being dumped into your body so it goes through this brutal process of filtering what it does and doesn’t need which causes you immense pain.

To get rid of this pain you have to make physical contact with water which seems like an impossible task when you are surrounded by people who need their sorrows to be lifted immediately.

When you make contact with water it turns into this gooey black substance that you can manipulate into whatever your heart desires. The substance does eventually
evaporate because that's how emotions are; they come and go.

There was so much more to your magic but you never had time to truly learn how it works with everyone trying to use it for their own selfish desires. It felt like a huge 10000 piece puzzle that you don’t know what it’s supposed to look like. Yea you have a few pieces together but you never had enough time to piece the full puzzle together.

Chapter Text

Heavy footsteps of faeries looking for you echoed in the hallway connecting the west wing to the south wing of the building unbeknownst to them you were hiding in the small cabinet under the sink, half asleep. None of the faeries ever checked there since.. well there was a large sink taking up about 70% of the space leaving whoever hiding there the rest of the 30% but that never stopped you.

Sure, there were some drawbacks like how you were forced into an uncomfortable sitting position, or how hot it was especially when you were covered from head to toe in fabric, but at least there weren’t like 20 faeries storming you at once. Maybe hiding from the faeries who were just trying to feel better about everything in general was a little bit cruel but you were out there for hours tending to their needs you deserved to be a little bit selfish.

The sound of the door to the room you were in opening disrupted your thoughts. At first you thought nothing of it until the cabinet door opened revealing Silverbell. The sudden change in lighting caused your eyes to squint.

“There you are! Elder Faerie needs you; he says it’s urgent.”

You gave Silverbell a small lazy nod, a yawn leaving your lips as you rubbed your eyes. When sliding out of the cabinet, the black goo on your pants (or maxi skirt !!) left behind a small trail in the cabinet.

“Out of all the places you could have hid you decided to hide in a cabinet?” Silverbell asked though there was no judgement in his voice, just playfulness.

“It’s not like it’s the first place you checked” You grumbled a bit annoyed he had found your main hiding spot but it’s not like Silverbell ever asked you to use your magic on him so maybe there was a chance he wouldn’t tattle on you to the other faeries.

“..Lead the way then”

…

Knock Knock

“Come in.”

Creakkkkkk

Upon opening the door you and Silverbell were met with Elder Faerie who was staring out the window with an unreadable expression on his face.

“You wanted to see me?”

“Ah, yes. Silverbell, I believe you have other duties to attend to?” Elder Faerie asked, giving Silverbell the hint that he wanted to talk with you alone.

“Yes, your majesty.”

Silverbell, understanding what Elder Faerie’s intentions were, turned on his heel and left, leaving you and Elder Faerie alone.

“What is it that you wanted to discuss, your majesty?”

“Ah well, I’ve had a few complaints about you concerning actively avoiding your duties.. is this true?”

“…Maybe”

‘Can he piss off? I’m literally running on less than 2 hours of sleep right now!!!’

Elder Faerie sighed softly, getting the conformation he needed. He turned his gaze towards you, his expression not disappointment, but understanding..?

‘Wait. No I lied, it's 100% disappointment.’

“I know how stressful it can be.. caring for a whole kingdom, it’s stressful. Truly, worrying about each and every single person is a heavy burden.. Tell me, Y/n, why is it that the cookies depend on you?” His words did not match the condescension and authority in his voice.

“Because they're struggling..?” You said fighting the urge to say struggling in a mocking tone.

’More like struggling in 5 inch deep water.’

“Bingo. Y/n, they are struggling and need help, your help. You have the power to help them.. Tell me, do you remember how distraught all the faeries were when they heard about White Lily’s..condition..?”

“Yes.”

‘Of course I do, every single faerie kept pestering me every chance they got! I barely got any sleep that month! No seriously, who wakes someone up at 2:00 AM just to harass them about how they feel? It was insanity!’

“Well you have the power to give them the motivation to keep going. The power to give faith to the other faeries. Why not be the life boat they need? Do you have no sympathy for them?”

“I do its just..” You sighed, not having an excuse that didn’t make you seem selfish, “I-i’ll try to be more mindful.” Reluctance in your tone.

“And I'll be looking forward to seeing that change.. You're dismissed.”

You gave him a half bow before power walking out of there before any faeries could find you.

‘Just gotta hide in plain sight then It’s not actively avoiding my duties if they just couldn’t find me.. I don’t deserve to rot in this stupid grey kingdom.. Now where to-‘

“Y/N cookie’s over here!” Shouted a Faerie guiding the crowd of seven to fourteen faeries behind them towards you.

‘Shit’

‘I can’t run, if I run I get more complaints..! Running from them = more complaints, more complaints = less time sleeping and more time getting lectured.. But then again if I run then I can regain the lost sleep time I lost due to the lectures..’

“Y/N! Y/N!” One faerie called out desperately, cutting off your thoughts. You had to make a choice and fast!

Elder faerie’s warnings echoed in your head.. Maybe you did need to be more mindful…

‘Nah it’s not like the Faeries have done anything for me!’

And with that you sprinted as fast as you could down the hallway dodging people and obstacles in a zigzag motion. Loud complaints coming from the few people you accidentally pushed while running for your life echoed through the halls making it basically impossible to lose the crowd of faeries.

God you wished you were an actual Faerie, running from people who can fly is not fun.

SMASH !

The inevitable finally happened: you crashed into a Faerie. A low groan left your body after hitting the ground. When looking up to see who exactly you ran into you were met with an annoyed Mercurial Cookie.

“Watch where you’re going next time, Y/n cookie”

“You‘re acting like I ran into you on purpose” You grumbled.

“Y/N! Y/N!”

‘Crap!’

And in the blink of an eye you were suddenly surrounded by Faeries begging for your help.

“Y/nnnn!! Can you use your powers on me? I’ve been having such a rough day you know how it is!”

“Same here! I’ve been really unmotivated lately. Can you help me with that?”

“Y/n! You know I don’t ask for much so can you also use your powers on me??”

‘Andddd there goes my sleep time..’

Chapter Text

‘I still can’t believe Mercurial knight Faerie just left me like that ! Ughh can the witches just put me out of my misery it’s been hoursssssss..’

“Y/n, do you think you can do me next? I have this test coming up and I don’t really wanna deal with all the stress”

“..Oh- uh yea sorry i was spacing out” You said your words slurred together incoherently due to exhaustion as you slowly extended your ungloved hand out for R/F #1 to take which they reciprocated the gesture.

A stinging sensation coursed through your body before you dipped your other hand which was gloved into a once full canister of water but was now almost filled with black goo easing the sensation but producing more slime in the process.

‘Huh i’m almost out of water.. Maybe I can spin this into an excuse to leave?’

You slowly dropped your hand before making an announcement to the crowd, “I-uh I’m almost out of water.. I’m gonna go get more.. I’ll be back” You muttered tiredly.

“Thats what you said last time and you did not come back! How are we supposed to trust you after that stunt? Besides, can't you just………”

You couldn’t make out the rest of that faerie was saying it sounded.. muffled almost? Like you were underwater or something.. Your eyelids started growing heavy, the corners of your eyes going black.

‘I can’t fall asleep right now, I can't fall asleep right now, I can’t fall asleep right now, I can’t fall asleep right now, I can’t..’

.

Thud

Your thoughts scrambled to piece together as you slowly started to regain consciousness. Everything felt heavy.. When you finally came back to your senses you started to take in your surroundings.. It seems that you were on the couch in Elder Faerie’s office..?

Suddenly a voice snapped you out of your thoughts, “Y/n?” Elder Faerie said concern laced in his voice, but he wasn’t alone; behind him was Silverbell and 4 unfamiliar people standing next to him that definitely were NOT faeries.

‘Who- wait no actually I have a better question how did they get into the faerie kingdom? Did Silverbell just.. let them in?’

None of them were really appealing besides this blonde guy with an ice cream cone hat but learning more about these cookies was not your top priority at the moment.

“Oh- I uh.. Hi, how long was I out for..?”

“..An hour or 2, you passed out while helping the other faeries, they were really worried so they took you here. How are you feeling?” Elder Faerie said, completely ignoring the other 5 people behind him.

“I feel”

‘Horrible’

“fine“

“Ah well that's good. When I told you, you needed to be more.. helpful to the other Faeries I didn’t mean you needed to go out right that second and overwork yourself.”

‘It's not like that was what I was trying to do’

At this point you couldn’t tell if he was being genuine or if he was just trying to make himself look good in front of the others.

“Sorry..”

After a brief period of awkward silence Elder Faerie suddenly spoke up, “You should get some rest.

“Yea I’ll uh be in my room.” You said before walking out a little bit quickly then you intended. You did NOT want to be in that room a second longer.

The halls were awfully empty..? There would normally be at least 3 cookies in each hall but so far it was only you. Your gut was telling you that something was horribly wrong but you decided to ignore it and kept walking.

Upon opening the door to your room you were met with a mess, it looked like the aftermath of a tornado, it was worse than how you originally had it this morning and even though it was originally messy this was on a whole other level.

Clothing from draws were thrown on the ground, the boxes of trinkets you kept under your bed were open, the contents thrown on the ground. It was obvious that whoever was in here was searching for something.

You blankly stared at the mess before stepping over a pile of pretty rocks you kept in a box and jumping straight into bed. People coming into your room and ransacking the place was pretty normal for you.

People were basically always looking for you so your room was a place that was always searched which was really annoying.

Because of this you started keeping weird items in your room to keep them out, like Todd the excessively large carrot plush that is the size of your door, oh and his ex wife Linda who was a tomato bean bag chair with enormous googly eyes. (For reference she kinda looks like Mr tomato)

Since then people have searched your room significantly less but they didn’t fully stop if you couldn’t tell.

‘I’ll clean this mess up later.. I just need some sleep right now..’

The only thing on your mind at the moment was sleep, not the unfamiliar cookies in Elder Faerie’s office, not the cookies that you passed out on, just sleep.

You slowly tucked yourself into your bed and drifted off to sleep still drained from helping the Faeries.

.
.
.

Suddenly you were awoken to Silverbell rudely barging into your room and shaking you roughly, “Y/N, Y/N!! WAKE UP WE’RE UNDER ATTACK!!” He screamed, panic was evident in his voice.

You slowly started stretching and rubbing your eyes, “mghnmm 5 more min- wait we’re what now?”

“THERE'S NO TIME TO EXPLAIN!! WHITE LILY NEEDS YOU!” He suddenly grabbed you by your arm, roughly pulling you out of the comfort of your bed and into your feet.

“Wha-? WOAH SLOW DOWN!!” You yelped, scrambling to your feet.

He started sprinting down the halls dragging you behind him before you even had time to process everything.. What did he mean by White Lily needed you? He dragged you all the way out of the west wing and to the Silver tree… ‘WAIT WHY IS THE ATTACK HAPPENING AT THE SILVER TREE’

And then you saw it, White Lily cookie, the 4 unfamiliar cookies from earlier, Mercurial Knight cookie and a Blue cookie dressed in a jester costume coming out of the tree.

‘No it can’t be..’

Chapter Text

You froze, they wanted YOU to help fight SHADOW MILK ?! That was like a death wish! You, like 6 other cookies versus a cookie that was basically equivalent to a god was just insanity! You didn’t even have good control over your powers there was no way you would ever be able to take down a god! Was there seriously no one else they could’ve voluntold to do this?

Silverbell Cookie ran past you and straight to White Lily cookie’s side ready for anything. His bravery was admirable but our chances of survival aren’t great! In fact WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!

‘Calm down, calm down, CALM DOWN!! Ok so what are my choices. 

1.  run (Cowarddd) 
2.  fight (Will prob die or get heavily injured although if I die I’m pretty much free and if I get heavily injured I can spin that into an excuse to not use my powers on people after the fight)
3. Help the civilians evacuate (I would probably have to use my powers a lot which would hurt like shit)
4.  Help the Blue guy and hope he doesn’t murder me (Not the worst optionnn but it goes against all of my morals)
5. Use powers on Blue guy and hope he joins your team (He’s prob insane since he’s been stuck in a tree for like thousands of years so his emotions would probably make me explode or something)

Secret 6th option! I kill myself now so I don’t have a horrible death later

All of these options suck!! Like I don’t wanna die for a kingdom that doesn’t even consider me as their own!’

Before you could make up your mind, blue strings wrapped themselves around your arms pulling you towards the mess. You started kicking your legs rapidly in hopes that the strings would just come off but of course that didn’t work and before you knew it you were dangling in front of some bad shit crazy jester. 

“Ooo! What do we have here? A wittle faerie?” Shadow milk mockingly said as he started puppeting you around, “It’s not every day I can get my hands on a doll this small !” He giggled like a teenage girl in love.

(Idk if i’ve mentioned this but Y/n is a pretty small cookie bc they were made out of very little dough making them smaller than the average cookie their a little over Pure Vanilla’s nose and Pure Vanilla is short as is soooo)

‘I swear to witches if this blue TWINK doesn’t put me down right now I’m gonna riot’

Shadow milk, now slightly annoyed he wasn’t getting a response from you, tightened the strings causing a yelp escaped your lips as blood started to draw from your arms, but when the blood made contact with your skin it turned into that familiar black goo.. Which made sense since 30% of jam is made out of water.

You probably suctioned up Silverbell’s emotions when he dragged you here but didn’t really notice it because of the adrenaline.

“PUT THEM DOWN!!” Silverbell shouted desperation laced in his voice as he aimed his bow at shadow milk (Like that was gonna do anything)

‘This feels like a fever dream’

Shadow milk rolled his eyes at Silverbell’s shouts as he pulled you closer towards him, you were now like a foot away from him which wasn’t ideal! He looks like he has horrid breath so you would much rather stand 7 feet away from him!

Upon seeing the black goo dripping from your arms he let out a little giggle, “Licorice magic? You’re not a Faerie after all!” He started playing around with the strings causing more goo to come out, "Whattt did you try to deceive me? The beast of deceit!”

‘What is he talking about? He literally assumed I was a faerie. I didn't say shit!’

“Uh huh righttt” You sarcastically said, since you were in the presence of Elder Faerie you can say sarcastic remarks without being scolded… ‘Where is Elder Faerie anyways..? He’s the guardian shouldn’t he be here?’

You started looking around for him since he SHOULD be here! Suddenly a pair of gloved hands cupped your face and turned your head towards the blue jester. 

“Ay! Eyes on me, after all I am the main character!!”

You rolled your eyes at him.

‘There's no way he’s a twink AND has a main character complex, pick a struggle!’

Suddenly 2 familiar arrows shot at him but instead of him dodging it he just used you as a body shield. The arrows dug into the back of your thigh causing more black goo to escape from you and drip onto the floor.

“Nice try!” 

You slightly winced at the feeling, your pain tolerance was pretty high since you were basically always in pain so it wasn’t THAT bad compared to how your body would react to large amounts of other people’s emotions.

“Y/N!!” Silverbell shouted desperation and regret in his voice.

“You knowww I might just keep this doll, it’s kinda cute” Shadow milk said as if you were some sort of toy for him to pick and choose.

‘Ok this is getting a little old’

You lifted your right arm above your head causing the strings to tighten and draw more blood but at this point you didn’t really care. If no one was going to save you, you would have to do it yourself.

The black slug from your body started rising, turning into small makeshift projectiles. With a flick of the wrist you smashed them into a nearby wall, the clay on the wall crushing and sticking to the blobs making the projectiles sharper as you flew them straight into Shadow Milk.

Shadow milk caught off guard dropped you to dodge the projectiles causing you to land head first into the hard ground, your head recoiling off the ground making the world spin.

‘Wow.. that was a horrible idea !!!’

One of the unfamiliar cookies with a cone on his head ran towards you, “Are you ok? Where does it hurt?” he said worriedly, however his words didn’t register in your mind, your gaze was fixated on Shadow Milk he looked LIVID there were a few shallow cuts on him but nothing too deep.

Without thinking you took one of the arrows in your leg and stabbed it into your thigh causing more jam to come out and turn into black goo. You hissed at the sensation but that wasn’t the main issue right now as you have a very upset beast trying to murder you.

The cone guy just stared at you in shock since the amount of blood loss you were experiencing was kinda insane but you were either gonna die from the blood loss of using your powers or from a twink with a main character complex so you couldn’t care less at that moment.

You used the goo you produced to create large platforms you can use to get to high ground since well Shadow milk being above you gives him an advantage. “Y/N, YOUR NOT IN ANY CONDITION TO FIGHT!” Silverbell yelled, fear was woven in his voice yet you ignored him, if you were gonna fight you were gonna go all in. (Alien stage reference!?!?)

Strings shot towards you, in response you shot black goo towards them causing Shadow Milk’s strings to be covered in it. Because of how sticky the substance was Shadow milk couldn’t shake it off of his strings mostly giving you control over his strings. 

Like yea he can sorta move them but it was now significantly slower than before and you were able to manipulate and control them with ease. Shadow Milk was absolutely fuming by this point and started shooting sharp cards in your direction. 

You narrowly dodged most of them while a few cut through your skin causing more blood to seep out. More and more cards came flying at you as you dodged them, it was like they were getting faster with each card thrown.

You were running low on goo and there was no way you were gonna be able to dodge all of those cards! Since you didn't have many choices you decided to use what was on the strings to make a shield since you didn’t really use his strings anyways.

Annoyed that he couldn’t get you due to the shield he changed his approach and strung up the 4 unfamiliar cookies causing screams of panic to be heard. 

‘Sucks to be them ig?’

White Lily looked absolutely horrified, “Everyone!” Silverbell shreaked in horror. 

“Enough of that, Let’s instead play a game! What will the new guardian of the seal choose… saving her friends or defeating Shadow Milk Cookie?” Shadow Milk said obviously loving the panic he caused.

“..Wait.. what does he mean by.. New guardian..?” You ask, your tone a mix of concern and genuine confusion.

Suddenly all eyes were on you, some cookies shot you sympathetic looks, while others shot you knowing glances.

..?

Chapter Text

THE AO3 CURSE GOT ME GOOD (i KNOW it will get worse soon sooooo i gotta start focusing on myself)

I am NOT abandoning i already have 2/3 of the next chapter done (as i should) have faith 🤞

Idk when i'll be back BUT i will be back trust..

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES !!! <333