Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Okay so, in my opinion there aren't enough fanfics of Copia with a male reader, or any type of good gay fanfic about him. seriously I tried everything, even filtering the shit out of it but still the first few fics that pop up are of Copia and Terzo. this doesn't take away from the few amazing fics that do exist in this topic though
I decided to take matters in my own hands and made one for myself. This is purely a self insert, so it may come over as Mary sue or something but idc, and its by no means written really well (English also isn't my first language)
I firmly believe Copia is gay and I will die on the hill that he deserves a good bf that takes care of him.

This story might be slow burn, depending on how I'm feeling. The story begins around the time Copia gets introduced as Cardinal and follows the timeline as closely as I can (I won't include all the tours cuz that's too time consuming and I'm lazy).

Backstory of Atlas.
Atlas is an oc I made as a self insert and is supposed to be Copias bf, eventually.
Atlas is an earth ghoul and one of the oldest in the clergy, being summoned when Nihil was still in his prime and he loved his life in the clergy. He saw the papas come and go as well as the ghouls and had great connections with them. He played in the band during Primo’s and Secondo’s time as the drummer of course (Earth and Pebble don’t exist in this version, sorry). He got replaced by Ivy during Terzo’s time and got a really strong bond with him and omega and became lovers. His life was perfect, everyone loved him and respected him, even Nihil. Speaking of that old man, the reason he’s still around is because he's Nihil's personal servant, because he simply is his favorite ghoul, he will do anything to deny the fact though. Then Copia came into the picture and suddenly his life turned upside down.

What does atlas look like
I have very specific headcanons of how the ghouls look, being very animalistic and depending on their element, in my headcanons earth ghoul are based on lions, goats or deers. Atlas is a mountain lion based ghoul, so he will look like a demonic kind of lion. He has a slightly beige/grey tinted fur and big teeth (i love teeth) and claws. He has a pretty broad build, with good muscle but is still chubby, he has a bit of stomach and thigh fat. Ghouls have anthropomorphic legs, meaning they literally look like a furry. All ghouls have horns, even if the animal they are based on doesn't have them. Only multi ghouls and fire ghouls don't have animal bases and look most like the standard demon you think off when you hear the word demon.
I will probably include a drawing of him (i did now)
(you can also look at my insta @tub_art07. i posted my ghoul headcanons there. or my tiktok @silly_goofy3)

reference used from mellon_soup                                               this one is my own

Ghouls are pack animals, they need a pack to thrive and survive with good mental and physcial health and will seek comfort in the other ghouls. That doesn't immediately mean that they love each other tho.

This story will be written from Atlas his pov, all the time. I might write a story about Copias pov, but in this story you will not know what his experience or thoughts are. copia will be very ooc, but that is because its purely how atlas sees him most of the time.

I will try my best to post regulary
and enjoy this stupid little story of two gay old men

Chapter Text

The radio is blaring, soft bodies pressed against each other, making the room unbearably hot and humid. I feel someone kicking my ass and a pair of horns poking in my chest, tails tangled with other ghouls in the cuddle pile. Normally I love these cuddle piles, I mean they are necessary for a ghouls mental well being, but right now I can’t stand them. I try to pry the claws from the ghoul behind me open, in a chance to crawl out of this heap of sweat and fur. After a bit of protest I finally get out and shake, getting the icky feeling out of my fur. “Where are you going, big guy?” came a low rumbling voice. I turn around to face the sleepy ghoul, his black fur all ruffled. “Going for a walk, don’t worry about me”. The other answers with a soft hum and then he drops his head again, proceeding his slumber.

Softly I tiptoe to the door, avoiding twitching tails and kicking feet. Some ghouls look at me questioning but don’t have the energy to actually ask something. The other ghouls just got back from tour a few days ago, and with the big scare they had when Terzo was suddenly pulled off stage they were extra tired and in need of comfort, the other ghouls and I trying our best to keep them calm in a big cuddle pile. Finally I reached the door and stepped out of the room, the cold halls of the clergy waving over my clammy body, I inhaled the comforting smell and sighed. I’ve always loved the silent halls, seemingly unending, almost like you're alone in the world. It’s rare to bump into someone, even if there’s a special event, this place is just too damn big.

Aimlessly I wander around, looking into random rooms to find some weird little trinket that another ghoul or sibling of sin left. Room after room, hall after hall, it begins to get a bit boring, not finding anything fun or useful.
Lost in thought I bump against a wall, right next to a big, dark wooden door. I hadn’t seen this door before, so this could get a lot more interesting. Carefully I push the creaking door, a wave of strong incense hit my face, making my eyes water. ‘What the fuck could they possibly do in there’, fully opening the door I shield my eyes from the blinding light, the smell of incense only getting stronger and stronger. Once my eyes got used to the bright light from the windows I step inside, the soft carpet my paw sinks into took me by surprise, and in awe I look around the room. It seemed to be an office from someone, not Nihils, so maybe this is from the Sister, since I've never ever been in hers. I stroll past the cabinets filled to the brim with books, I read a few of the titles, most of them were about rituals and Satan. There are at least three burning incense spread around the room, giving such a strong, mixed smell it almost made me hurl. I walk to the littered bureau in the middle of the room, quickly I sweep my eyes over the scattered paperwork, one particular name catching my eye. “Papa Emeritus III, what could they possibly want to do with him?” I muttered to myself, my tail started swishing nervously, suddenly getting a dooming feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I stuffed the piece of paper in the pocket of my pants and sprinted out the door, getting so extremely nauseous, I couldn't stand being there for even one more second.
The eerie quietness from before now turned deafening and crushing, the walls stretching on in the darkness, disappearing in the mist curling around my paws. It doesn't feel comfortable anymore, the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and goosebumps raised over my whole body. I grip my tail in comfort, ears flicking in every direction, desperately picking up any sound, but there was nothing.

After what felt like multiple tortuous hours I stand outside the Ghouls den, still too fucking quiet. I open the door and gasp in shock, eyes widening and ears pinning back. The whole room was fucking trashed. Furniture literally everywhere, beds turned over with the sheets pulled off, scratch marks on the floor, accompanied by big tufts of fur and scales. I stumble over the broken radio stepping foot inside the room, after taking the wreckage in and getting over the initial shock, I sprint to the rooms hoping that maybe all the ghouls were huddling together there and that this maybe was the aftermath of a really big playfight. Nothing, panicking, I tug at my hair, muttering curses under my breath as I pace around the room, stumbling over furniture. I point my ears upright, changing my whole posture, when I hear a scared voice cry out. I ran to the opposite room, my room and opened the door.

There he was, the small water ghoul, squeezed in the far corner of my bedroom, slightly trembling. Swiftly I walk over and kneel down, taking the sobbing ghoul in my arms.
“Hey, hey, shh, it's okay, I'm here now,” I tried to comfort him, Dew hiccups and grips my hoodie tight, nuzzling his face in my chest. “They're gone,” he sobbed, my breath hitching and I tilt his head up. “What do you mean, Dew, what do you mean they're gone.” I desperately ask him, needing an answer, my eyes flick over his face, desperately looking for any sign that it was some sick joke. The ghouls eyes just flood over with tears again and he just wails, I had never seen this ghoul so incredibly distressed and sad, what could have possibly happened.

“Dew, you gotta calm down for me okay-” I rub his back in a comforting manner, my tail entwining with his while I pull him in my lap, “please, just take a deep breath, please for me. Follow my breathing.” I take a deep breath, my chest rising and dew follows, his body heaving with suppressed sobs. “That's it, good job”, I look down at the water ghoul, seeing he’s calming down and I try to question him again. “Can you please try to explain what happened, I need to know what happened here sweetheart.”

Dew took a deep breath, “just after you left, there was like a knock, and, and then people just barged in, and we tried to fight them but they were with a lot, and some of us got injected with something, but I don't know what, but I swear we tried to fight them off.” It is so weird seeing the normal hothead of a ghoul this weak. “I know you tried to fight them off dear, I can see that.” I ruffle his long blond hair, Dew snarls at me giving me a warning look. “After they sedated the first ghoul, I don't know who, I ran to your room and locked myself in there.” I don't know how to respond anymore, the seriousness of the situation finally settling in. We just sat there for the rest of the night, eventually moving to my bed. We both couldn't sleep so we just silently cried and talked.

Slowly I blink open my eyes, squinting in the bright light of the sun. i sit up, the forgotten ghoul on my chest tumbling off the bed with a loud yelp, “oh my god, I'm so sorry,” I quickly help the ghoul upright and on the bed, “I just remembered something.” Dew just looks at me, unamused, making me grin awkwardly. I pull the little piece of paper out of my pocket, it's fully crumbled up from the night sleep, but still readable. “Look at this, I found it in Sisters office. At least, I think it's Sister’s office.” Dew tilts his head in curiosity, “what does it say then?”
“I haven't read it yet.” I look down sheepishly at the paper. “well , fucking read it then idiot”, Dew said smacking my head, making me growl slightly. “Fine, impatient much?” I clear my throat and read the piece of paper.

“Papa Emeritus III, lead Singer, mostly known as Terzo.
He seems to not follow the rules of our sacred clergy, not spreading the word of Satan.
We must find someone to follow him up.
He is to be punished for his actions, making clear what happens when you are disobedient.
I ask you kindly to make a fitting punishment for him.
Yours sincerely,
Sister Imperator.”

A knot twisted in my stomach, making me sick. I look up at Dew, he looks sickly pale. Thousands thoughts race through my mind, mostly the question of what could have possibly happened to my dear Terzo. It was silent for a couple minutes, neither of us knowing what to say. Our head snaps up at the sound of a knocking, Dew whimpers and I quickly shoot him a reassuring glance and walk to the door. Opening it I stand face to face with a sister of sin, she looks nervous, twisting her delicate hands. “Sister Imperator wants to see you two.” she murmurs, i almost didn't catch it but i nod and close the door, hearing her scurry away. I walk to Dew and explain that Sister wants to see us. He obviously doesn't want to leave the safe space, but I take his hand and just drag him along. Curious what Sister's explanation is of this situation.

We arrive at Papa Nihil's office, and knock on the door. “Come in,” said the icy voice of Sister Imperator, so we push open the door and walk inside. She looks up from the paperwork in front of her nose, and with a snap of her fingers rough hands came from the darkness. My eyes widen in panic when calloused fingers clamp around my mouth, I try to claw them off desperately, but they won’t budge. I hear a yelp next to me, quickly I jerk my head to the side where I see Dew fighting with multiple shadow figures who are actively trying to inject him with something. I scream, muffled, but scream nonetheless and try fighting harder. To no avail, i watch helplessly when Dew slumped boneless against the bodies that betrayed him. Silently they drag his unconscious body out the door, closing it with a slam and I was released.

I snarl at the person behind me, baring my fangs in a warning, but when I turn around, they’re gone. “I suppose you have some questions, ghoul”, her voice sound like nails on a chalkboard, slowly I turn around and straighten myself. “Yes, I would like to know,” I answer with a deep growl, making her give me a warning look. “Simply put ghoul, we are getting a new arrangement for our rituals, there are going to be a few new ghouls, along with a new lead singer.” she explains and I nod along, “however this time we have decided to get rid of all distractions around the clergy, you may know that we are unhappy with the behaviour of Terzo and have made sure that he gets a fitting punishment”. Every word that came out of her mouth felt like a knife twisting, I look at her in disbelief, breath hitching and tears threatening to spill over. “Don’t cry ghoul, Nihil spared you, you should thank him”.

“What is going to happen to them?” it takes a lot out of me to not downright scream at her and lunge at her to claw her throat out, I still need to be professional to her. “Nothing that concerns you ghoul, they’re gone and all you should worry about is making the new ghouls and Cardinal comfortable. You're dismissed.” I slam my claws on her desk, scratching the wooden top slightly, “NO, you can’t do this to me, where are Terzo and Omega, I need to fuckING KNOW,” I shouldn't scream, but that dooming feeling was clawing in my chest, I just want to know. “See this is the problem ghoul, Terzo has gotten too attached, he swerved from his path and didn’t fulfil his duty to spread the word of Satan. He and his predecessors are going to be punished for their faults. Simple consequences”. She doesn’t even show one ounce of emotion, completely lacking any empathy and I just can’t believe her, after all these years of love and support her personality just made a full 180, completely changing everything about her. She looks at me again, expecting me to leave, but I stand tall, looming over her, “I won’t leave until you tell me what happened.” she sighs deeply, writhing her eyes with her hand, “I forget how stubborn you can be, Atlas,” I smile, there it is, my name, now I can get basically everything I want. “So tell me,” I urged, getting more and more impatient by the second.

“He’s dead”.

Those two words, two damned words, made my whole world as I know it shatter. He's dead, gone, forever. “W-what?” my ears drooped, tail hanging limply and tears leaving my eyes like a hot waterfall. “I didn’t want to tell you Atlas, for your own sake. Even though her words sound like she felt regret, she doesn’t show any of it, as if she is just stating facts like any other normal day. “And Omega?” I ask quietly, not wanting to know the answer, but still needing to have some kind of closure. “He and the other ghouls, who didn’t get chosen by me to play in the rituals are all going back to hell.” “they didn’t deserve that,” “that's what you believe,” “NO, fucking NO ONE deserves that.” both of my lovers, and most of my pack gone, and they thought they did me a favour by sparing me, only because I'm the personal ghoul of Nihil, it’s not even a fucking favour then anymore. “Why can’t I be with my pack?” I sobbed desperately, fully ugly crying now, snot and tears smeared in my fur and my eyes bloodshot red.

“Nihil needs you,” came the simple answer, fucking Satan, I just want my boyfriends again. “Who of the ghouls are staying?” I just want to be in my bed, but I still need to know, since it’s my task to greet the new ghouls. “Only Aether and dewdrop, and dewdrop is to be changed to a fire ghoul”, my jaw drops in shock, “you think Dew would, that small ghoul, would be able to deal or survive an element change, let alone one from water to fire. You’re crazy, worse than just crazy.” I ramble, worrying about Dews mental and physical health. We almost never had an element change, and if it happened the ghoul would only be able to play a few shows. “The decision stands, we found a better water ghoul and we have a safer way to do it now, so don't worry about it.”

I am worrying about it, thank you very much. A water to fire change is one of the most dangerous changes that can happen and it’s almost that Dew is like a little test rabbit for them. “I will sue you when anything happens to him” I say, pointing an accusing finger at her nose, claws almost touching the tip of it before she slaps it away.
“Tonight the new Cardinal will be welcomed, I expect you to be there to welcome him with open arms ghoul. Tomorrow night he will summon the new ghouls, you will help him.” she orders strictly, i just nod, wanting to be done. “You're dismissed,” this time i turn on my heel and stride out the now opened door, straight to the now completely silent ghouls den. I slump on my bed and curl around my comforter, still smelling vaguely of Omega, then I notice the black hoodie on the floor, Terzos hoodie. Swiftly I grab it and stuff my face in it, inhaling the strong smell of Terzos cologne.
Tears spilled over my still damp cheeks, just wanting the comfort of my pack and Terzo.

I spend the rest of the day crying, dreading the moment to meet the new guy

Chapter Text

I stand there, in the cold halls of the clergy next to Sister imperator. Dressed in my best suit, nervously waiting for Papa Nihil to arrive. He slowly walks down the corridor, two children on his heels carrying his oxygen tank. Finally he stops in front of us and greets her, completely ignoring me, or he just didn't see me.

“Sister, you're looking very well”, Sister smiles, “hello papa”. She looks down at the two children grimly, “leave us. Now” the children scutter away, leaving the oxygen tank next to Nihil's feet.

He looks at me, finally noticing me and smiles dumbly before refocusing on Sister.
“Papa nihil, I hope you’re not as unwell as they say”, the worry in her voice makes me scoff slightly, “if I were unwell, could i do this?” Nihil said when he grabs a saxophone out of literally nowhere, where the fuck did that thing come from. He plays a weird note, drawing it out while Sister tries to push it away.
“Because, I want you to be able to hear what I'm saying”, she caresses his cheek, I tried to stifle a slight gag.
“Papa, I would like to congratulate you on the fine work your progeny have been doing, especially that of your youngest, for his winning that most beloved of golden calves, the Grammy,” i snarl, the fake proudness evident in her voice, i found it almost amusing how she could say those horrible things to me about Terzo and now act like nothing's wrong.

“Thank you sister, I-” nihil tries to thank her but gets cut off, “I cannot, I cannot, because you see papa. It's not enough, maybe if your oldest son had won ten years ago we would have something to celebrate, but no, no, no, we need something new.” there it is, all that judgement, always needing more of the Papa’s, the need to push them to their limits. Sister had always been disappointed in the fact Primo never won a Grammy, and she made it clear every day. He acted like it didn’t hurt him, like it meant nothing to him, just acting like the evil man he is. But I knew deep down he dwelled on it, all because of that damned woman. While I was lost in thought, Sister continued her preaching on needing someone better, younger. I tuned in again, hearing the words ‘sexual charisma’ and saw Nihil panting like a bitch in heat. “Someone more like, well you, but in your prime,” she finishes, Nihil muttering a few yesses under his breath, sister chiming in. Honestly, it was disgusting.

I cleared my throat, snapping them out of their daydream. “Not here, not now, not like this. We’re going to need some new blood-” she sighs deeply, “someone slightly younger, and he's going to need your help”. She looks at Nihil when she says that, but I fully know that Nihil won’t do shit and it's my responsibility to help that man.

Someone knocks at the door, making us all look up and sister gasps in excitement, “he’s here”.
A silhouette appears behind the door. I don’t know how he managed to knock before he arrived, but he somehow did it. The door opens and music can be heard, a melody I didn't recognise and it is loud. A scrawny looking man, dressed in a black cassock adorned with a silver crucifix walks inside. On his shoulder is the biggest radio I had ever seen, how does he keep that upright? He stops in front of us and nods his head slightly, I can finally get a good look at his face, he looks stupid.
“Well, hello papa, you looking well,” he even sounds stupid. Those mismatched eyes surrounded with dark face paint flicking across our faces, taking us all in. I try looking my toughest, to intimidate him, I puff out my chest and slightly bare my fangs. Copia just stares and Nihil looks incredibly disappointed, “oh sister, may I have a word with you?” he turns to the proud looking woman, whose face slightly falters at the question, “certainly” and they both walk away.

I look at the man, he looks back, slightly nervous. That stupid pencil moustache above his black upper lip frustrates me, everything about him frustrates me. After a while he focuses his attention on the ranting couple a few feet away, I also pick up on the conversation, with ghouls having such good hearing it isn't that hard, something about bloodlines, and fathers. I couldn't care less, too busy focusing on the pathetic man in front of me, who started fiddling with his non-existing watch. Then Sister mentioned something that did get my attention.

“Need I remind you he holds the esteemed honour of second most employee of the month awards,” I look at the man who is stupidly bowing to nothing at the moment. He always has been here, and now I know who that mysterious motherfucker was that tried to take away my most employee of the month award. I grin wildly, fully baring my teeth this time and my tail started swishing, I felt proud of myself. “Very well, it's done,” Nihil said, making his final decision. They both step forward again, making the cardinal perk up, “everything, uh, okay there? Your dark excellencies”

“Cardinal come forward”, the cardinal awkwardly steps up, not really knowing what to do. Nihil puts his arms up, above the cardinal, making him bow. He chants some Latin words (no I'm not figuring out what he said) while the Cardinal nods along dumbly. Satan, I hate that guy already. When the old man is done the Cardinal stands up proudly, smiling smugly. “Welcome aboard,” Sister walks up to him and shakes his hand warmly, making me even angrier. “Now go up to level two and be fitted for your new outfits. Oh, and before I forget, let your personal ghoul introduce himself”, she gestured vaguely in my direction, making me roll my eyes.

“Yes, yes, thank you thank you. Ta”, he mutters while awkwardly patting nihils arm before turning to me. He puts out his hand, waiting for me to introduce myself, when I didn't make a move to talk he began instead. “Hello, little ghoul, I'm Cardinal Copia. Nice to meet you”, we stood there awkwardly before the sister harshly cleared her throat making me growl, “names Atlas”, short and straight to the point. I shake his hand, he has a pretty firm grip, but mine was firmer, making him wince.

He grabs his radio again and turns the loud music on, and with a last bow he turns around and walks out the door he came from. Sister immediately turns to Papa Nihil.

“Come papa, we must give your sons the news”. Hold up, this doesn’t add up.
I turn to the woman, clearing my throat and she just jumps. “What do you mean?” I ask Sister as calmly as I possibly could.
“What do you mean, you have to tell his sons. I thought they were dead.” I snarled, my tail twitching in an aggravated manner.

Sister stays quiet, realizing her mistake and she looks at me apologetically. The most sympathy she's given me for the last few hours, after everything that has happened. “So you mean to tell me I still can save him, keep him from your greedy hands.” With every word I take a step closer, my broad figure looming over her. “Right Sister, or are you going to restrain me. Not allowing me to see my boyfriend again?”

“Ghoul, you really don’t understand the situation.”
“What don't I understand then sister. Enlighten me”

Nihil cleared his throat, clearly oblivious, that dude frustrates me a lot. “I thought we were supposed to tell my sons about something?” Sister nods and before I could even think about throwing every possible curse word at her I got dragged away. Who are those strong motherfuckers who can so easily overpower me, an earth ghoul. After a while I just stopped struggling, I let myself hang limply, like a big angry cat.

They sling me on the ground and lock the door while I try to scramble upright. I’m back in the ghouls' den, this time it was neatly cleaned in preparation for the arrival of the new ghouls. I hear a soft hiccup and soothing shushing coming from a door, silently I walk over and knock on the door, grumbling lowly to announce that it's me. The door swings open to reveal a dishevelled Aether, who immediately lights up and throws himself at me. I almost tumble backwards trying to catch the big ghoul.

“Oh my Satan, you're safe. I thought you were gone too” he sobs in my shoulder, his chest heaving. After he calms down enough he tries to let go, but yelps when our horns get locked in each other, earning giggles from both of us.

“I'm glad you're here, Dew is doing pretty bad. I still can’t believe they did an element change on him,” he explains worriedly, making me rumble silent curses under my breath and storm past him, seeing Dew curled up on Aethers bed. I kneel down next to him and lay a claw on his now grey toned body, slightly steaming and glowing red in some spots. What worried me the most were the raw wounds/scars where previously his gills were, he still isn’t used to breathing without them, still gasping for breath every other second.

“Fuck, I didn’t know they would do it so soon, otherwise I would’ve prepared,” I turn Aether, who nervously is picking his nails and he looks up confused, “you mean you knew this would happen?”
“Sadly yes, Sister told me today, just a few hours ago, after she dragged Dew away. I didn’t know they would immediately do it.”

I look back at the trembling ghoul on bed, “we can’t do anything more than make him as comfortable as possible and go to sleep.”
Aether nods silently and crawls on bed next to dew, who instantly cuddles up to him. I plop down on the other side, nuzzling the soft blonde hair of Dew, at least that didn't change.

We got woken up by a harsh knocking on the door, groggily I open up my eyes and look around the dark room, trying to pinpoint where the fuck the sound is coming from. The knocking stopped for a second, but started again ten times louder. I shuffle out of the cocoon consisting of Dew and Aether and stumble to the main door. Opening it I lock eyes with the same sister of sin from yesterday, she looks nervous, like she’s hiding something.

“Sir Ghoul, you have to come quickly. The Papas are in the morgue, maybe you can say goodbye,” she mutters, making my ears perk up and causes a knot to tighten in my chest. “We have to be quick though, before Sister finds out,” we hurry out the halls, I follow her on her heels, trying to keep up with her running.

The smell of death greets me when the door opens, smoke making my eyes water slightly. There he is, dressed in full Papal outfit. I stride up to the table his body lies on, and raise a hand to touch his neatly painted face. The normal warmth now replaced with an ice cold unwelcome feeling, it made me tear up, he really is gone. He looks so pretty and peaceful, I lean down and give a feathery kiss on his cheek, tears dripping down on his face. The mortician came up to me and looked at me with sympathy.

“You really did a good job to preserve his beauty.” I praise him, the mortician smiles and mutters a soft thank you.

“Do you want to take the honour and put his mitre on?” He hands me the delicate, gold accented mitre. Terzo disliked his mitre, always saying it messed up his pretty hair, but I nod and carefully place it down on top of his head. I made sure to keep the strands of jet black hair as neat as possible, brushing a few behind his ears.

“Goodbye my Raven. I love you”

My final goodbye. I turn around and look at the Sister of sin and we walk out the door after a soft goodbye to the mortician.

“Thank you so much, you practically risked your job, maybe even life. But you still did it,” I really want to make sure how glad I am for her.
“How can I ever pay you back?”

She just smiles. “You don’t have to, nobody should ever lose their significant other without saying goodbye.” Then her smile drops and she frowns slightly, “I'm sorry you couldn't say goodbye to the other Ghouls.”
“Don't be sorry my dear, it’s not your fault, you already did all this. I’m forever grateful for you.”
We arrive back at the ghouls den, I wave a quick goodbye and head inside to meet Aether and dew. I find them still curled up on Dew's bed, who already looks slightly better, he’s breathing normally again at least. I tiptoe over and shake the bigger ghouls shoulders, trying to wake him up in a sane way. No use, that bitch sleeps like death, so I start pulling on his tail and he tumbles out of bed with a very feminine scream.

“What the fuck dude, why would you do that?!” he throws his hands up in an exaggerated manner, I just shrug and move on to Dew, who is somehow still sleeping.

“Just leave it to me big ogre, you're not really careful,” Aether pushes me away and gently shakes the smaller ghoul, giving him butterfly kisses around his horns. Dew just slaps at Aethers nose, but still wakes up.

“So, Atlas, care to explain why you awoke us so rudely,” Dew asks after he’s fully woken up, crossing his arms over his chest, clearly unamused.

“The Cardinal is going to summon the new ghouls today, we need to be there and look our best. So better get ready.”
“New Ghouls? Already?!” Aether exclaims, his tail swishing wildly behind him, smacking Dew in his face.
“Mhm, Sister is wasting no time”

I walk out the door to my room, leaving the Two ghouls to themselves. Luckily I had to wear my suit yesterday so it was already ready, a bit wrinkled but nothing too bad. I grab it and walk in the bathroom, I look at myself in the mirror and scoff, stupid. I comb my hair and throw on my suit, smoothing out the wrinkles the best I can.

I stroll to the main area, hearing Aeth and Dew bicker, it's quite amusing.
“I'm going! Be at the ritual room in one hour!” I yell out, getting a simultaneous ‘yea’ as a response. Shaking my head I step out the door, closing it behind me and march to The papa suites on level two. It takes a while to find the Cardinals room, but once I did I gave it a few rapid knocks, hearing a bleary ‘yea, I'm coming’.

After ten or so minutes the door opens, I meet with the mismatching eyes of the Cardinal. They look so much like that of Terzo, and the other papas for that matter. He just stands there, fiddling with the fabric of his black cassock.

“What is it, ghoul?”

That fucking accent throws me off, so I snarl, making him shuffle on his feet a bit.
He’s so fucking pathetic with those stupid fucking questions with his stupid fucking accent.
I look him up and down, noticing his eye make-up is a bit smeared.

“You need to fix your make-up.”
“Does it really matter that much?”
“Yes”

He sighs and turns around, leaving the door open and I, of course, can’t stop myself from looking inside. The first and only thing I notice are the big cages in the back of the room and the hay covering almost the whole ground. What kind of animals does he keep and why. Before I know it he stands before my nose again, beaming slightly.
“Is it good now?”
“Its fine”
I grumble
“We need to go now”
He nodded and mumbles something in Italian, wringing his gloved hands together.
How will I ever survive with this man?

Chapter Text

“Rain, stop bothering him!”

Rain was rolling around on the ground, fighting off a snarling Swiss. Rain has been pushing the multi ghoul’s buttons for a while now, bored out of his mind.

“But what else am I supposed to do then?” he whines, wincing when Swiss’ claws sink into his shoulder. He bites at the bigger ghouls shoulder in defence, the play fight quickly turning sour when the ghouls both start growling with their ears in their neck.

“Come on now boys, do I really have to discipline you. You’re both grown ups, act like it.” they don’t listen to me and continue swerving around each other with swishing tails. Mountain, who’s lying on my chest snickers softly, making me sigh and push him off of me to get between the hissing ghouls. I grab Rain by the collar of his shirt, he’s smaller so it's easier to pull him away.
“Alright that's enough, both of you.” I growl, already fed up with both of them. Rain claws at my hand, causing me to let go of him. I give him a warning look and he sulks off to one of the ghoulettes in the other room, mumbling something about me being too strict.

“You”. I point at Swiss, he perks up smiling wildly. “Go bother Copia about rehearsals, it’s been a while.” he nods excitedly and scurries off.
It's been around 3 months since the new ghouls were summoned, it took a while for them to get used to life here, but everything is going smoothly. After the ritual I tried to avoid the Cardinal, only meeting him at the rehearsals for the new album he’s been making. The other ghouls, even Sodo and Aether, loved him. He was a lot less strict then the previous papa’s, but still I miss them a lot and it’s just different without them.

I look over to the couch I was previously sitting on, seeing Mountain now cuddling up with Sodo, softly kissing each other. God these ghouls are a lot more clingy and lovey then i ever experienced. I clear my throat at them, gesturing to them to move and I plop down, immediately being sandwiched by the two.

“GUYS, we have practice,” Swiss came barging in, his words earning a few growls and snarls. He just ignores it and makes way for Copia to enter the room. “Come on little ghouls, I just finished the last song and we need to give some attention to a few other songs.” He claps his leather gloved hands excitedly, his cassock swishing around his legs. The ghouls around me scramble upright and all leave for the rehearsal room. Normally they don’t need me for rehearsal so I just made myself more comfortable, until Copia made a soft ‘eh’ sound.

“We need you too Atlas,” expectedly he looks down at me, I make a low rumbling sound in the back of my throat. “Fine, don’t come then,” his shoulders slump and he turns around. Oh Satanas, this man may be too pathetic. Swiftly I stand up and stride past him out the door, not before running my claws through his neatly gelled hair, earning loud sounds in protest. I cackle while following the rest of the ghouls. They look up at me weirdly when I walk in the room, disturbing them from tuning their instruments.

“Yeah, I don’t know either guys, but he said he needs me too or something.” I shrug my shoulders, and slump down on one of the benches, pulling my tail on my lap, not wanting the ghouls to step on it while they were jumping around.
Copia walks in, his hair combed down neatly again. He gives me an angry side eye and I grin back, baring my teeth.

“Alright ghouls, I have the sheet music for the last song here.” he picks up a handful of paper and starts handing it out, earning excited whispers and chirps here and there. He stops before me and holds out a piece of paper in front of my nose, it has “life Eternal” written boldly at the top, with my name under it. I look up at him and take the piece of paper, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

“What is this supposed to mean, Cardinal?” he looks back at me, “we already have a drummer, what do you want me to do?” “backing vocals with Swiss.” he states as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. He turns around again, making a weird sound when he almost trips over a cable and stabilizes himself on a speaker. I saunter over to the multi ghoul, giving him a box. Quickly we set up another microphone for me and wait until Copia gives us a go.

“It’s supposed to be a slow song, alright guys. About mortality and immortality.” He sets up a metronome, giving us a sound of how fast it is.
We play it, slowly, getting used to the grips and sounds of the music flowing through the room. It’s emotional, something different then what you expect of the Band Ghost. Copia’s smooth voice cuts through the music, fully submerged in the notes and tones. Swiss and I jumped in, I'm not used to singing, but I try my best synchronising my voice to his.

The music ends and Copia turns around, beaming happily. “That was amazing guys, we need to focus on a few points but it sounds almost perfect!”
We spend the rest of the evening rehearsing songs from his new album, until a sibling of sin barges in, panting frantically. Copia hurries over, helping her calm down and getting her to breathe normally. “I-its……..sister” “what? What is with Sister?” “she…..had an……accident..she's in the…hospital” the Sister of sin barely got out between her pants. The panicked ghouls started scrambling out the door in a disorganised group of fur and scales, before Copia could even begin to keep them calm they were already gone. Quickly I follow the ghouls, leaving the Cardinal behind with the sibling of sin.

“GHOULS!” I roar through the halls, they all screech to a halt and start yelling and growling excuses. “No, I don't want to hear anything about it. We wait until we hear more of her wellbeing. In the meantime we make sure the clergy is as clean as possible for her when she comes back.” I order them harshly, not wanting them to bother the doctors while they are working on getting her better. Besides we don’t even know in what hospital she is.

We spend the next few hours cleaning our rooms, waiting for any news of Sisters situation.
A soft knocking takes our interest off our tasks and Sunshine opens the door, stepping aside for a fidgety Copia. He’s bare-faced, not even a touch of black lipstick, awkwardly he makes a weird sound in the back of his throat.

“Sister Imperator is stable, her bandages will come off in about six months”. A collective sigh of relief goes through the ghouls, happy that it isn’t something worse. “Dinner is ready in an hour”, with that Copia turns around and walks out the door, leaving us again.
Rapidly we finish cleaning the room in an hour, most of us getting hungry and cranky. Luckily before one of us could bite another's head the bells rang through the halls, announcing dinner time. Like a pack of wild beasts we ran, following the smell of freshly cooked food.

Even though I hate the Cardinal, he’s such an incredibly good cook. I just can’t say no to it. Since he noticed our liking in his food he started to cook more often, giving the normal cooks their occasional day off. We scramble around the table, Swiss and Aether fighting for the last place next to Copia, since Cirrus took the other one. I sit on the opposite side of him, next to Sodo, who is already gnawing at a chicken leg. Copias scream throws me out of my staring, I look up at him and see him holding his forehead and the two ghouls muttering worriedly around him. Cirrus glares at Swiss, i know enough, they can’t do anything normally.
Seeing Cirrus handle it, I quietly keep watch. Swiss keeps forgetting that Copia isn’t as strong as he is and now it’s just a headbutt, but next time Copia maybe won’t be able to sing anymore.

“Swiss, you need to stop fucking forgetting that Copia isn’t a fucking ghoul”, She sneers at the multighoul, who looks down in defeat. Copia laughs awkwardly, gesturing to Cirrus that it isn’t so bad, just a head bump. I snarl to Copia, “he still needs to learn, it can get really dangerous. It’s stupid if he keeps forgetting”. He holds his hands up in surrender and mutters a quick sorry.

After a quick scolding, everyone settled down and finally could eat in peace. I hear Swiss say something funny to Aeth and Copia, and Copia laughs. That fucking laugh. I choke on my food, he sounds so much like Terzo. The trio and Sodo look at me and promptly Sodo punches me in the back, I gasp for breath, tears spilling over. I excuse myself and run to my room, locking the door.
What the fuck just happened, it happened so fucking quickly. Why does his fucking laugh sound so much like Terzo’s and why didn’t I notice before, or this was the first time I ever heard Copia laugh. It’s known that he is a very shy and anxious person, normally not letting any emotion apart from fear and awkwardness show.

I choke back a sob, realisation dawning on me that I can't go to Terzo right now. Of course I know that I can't, but I really want him now. I want Terzo. And Omega.
A wail rips from my throat, that tight feeling, that I normally drown out, returning tenfold. That stupid feeling of want, but knowing you can’t get it. I rip at my chest fur, I don't want to feel that feeling. I try tricking my brain into thinking something else, singing a song, drawing, hating on Copia, but everything reminds me of them. My body is heaving with heavy sobs, gasping for air in between hiccups and wails of need. I so desperately want a warm body around me. Why does he need to be dead? I hate him, it’s so selfish of him that he dies and I don't.

The wanting craving in my chest turns to anger, as quick as the blink of an eye. I start punching everything in sight, screaming every curse word I know in English and Italian. I slouch against the wall, hitting the back of my head against it, desperately wanting the thoughts to stop. I look down at my bruised and bloodied knuckles, then up to the walls with holes dripping with blood. Crawling to my nightstand, I throw myself on my bed, turning on the radio. The sound of “He is” filling the tiny room, the sound of Terzo’s voice significantly calming me down enough. I hate Copia, is the first thought that pops in my mind, it starts to spiral. Why the fuck did he have to replace Terzo, if he wasn’t in the picture then Terzo wouldn’t be fucking dead.

Seething hate settles hot in my chest, it is all his fault. I scream in my pillow, my throat getting raw. After a few hours laying there, listening to Terzo’s soothing voice, I drift to sleep. A restless sleep, filled with honing laughter and accusations thrown at me by the voices of the different papas.

After that night, I refused to come out of my room for almost six months, completely bed rotting away. The other ghouls took turns to give me food and check up on me, sometimes spending the night cuddled up to each other. I might be depressed, but I won't deny my pack their needs to be with me.

It is Friday, one day before Sister was released. A loud knocking wakes me up from my slumber, the door swings open before I could mutter an answer. The beaming faces of sunshine and Swiss look down at me, their tails are trashing so wildly you almost can’t see them. Sunshine is rocking back and forth on her heels, it takes a lot out of her to not blurt out the things she and Swiss want to announce.

“What is it guys?” “WE’RE GOING ON TOUR!!” came the almost deafening scream, I jumped at the sudden loudness, covering my ears. “Oh my Satan, does it really need to be that loud?”
Swiss and Sunshine skip inside, not bothering to close the door and plop down next to me.
I cough from the sudden weight dropped on me, in the form of Swiss’ enormous body. “Yes it does!!” he yells in my ear, “it’s our first TOURR”. I can’t be annoyed at their excitement, I was the same when I went on my first tour too.

“You’re coming too right?” Sunshine asks worriedly, her big blue eyes locking with mine. I shake my head, her head bonked against mine when she slumped down in defeat. “Why not?”

“I haven’t been on tour since Terzo became frontman sweetheart”. I scratch softly behind her ear, but it didn’t do anything, Swiss also was equally defeated laying on top of my chest.
“I’m going to make sure you’re coming along Atlas, don’t you worry”, he mutters softly against my neck. I chuckle softly, petting his beginning dreads.

“You really don’t have to, I don't mind staying at the ministry”.
“But I do mind that you're staying at the ministry. What if I do everything wrong?”
“You won't do that Swiss, you’re a smart adult man, capable of doing their own thing.”
He sighs in defeat and crosses his arms as best as he can, with the way he is laying on me.
“Fine then” ……….. “Oh by the way, Copia wants you to join him to the hospital tomorrow”, I look at them in shock.

“That little fucker wants me to accompany him. How can i make it anymore obvious i don’t want anything to do with him”, I felt my tail tapping against the mattress in annoyance, then the delicate fingers of sunshine smoothing over it. My brows furrow and I scrunch my nose in disgust, I don't want to come with him.

“I don’t know either bro, he keeps mentioning wanting to bond better with you and about personal ghoul my ass. I don't know what it all means”. Ahw fuck, I forgot I am is personal ghoul assistant, assigned by Sister. Now I have to go tomorrow.
Promptly I feel a clawed finger running across my chest and I look at Swiss’ flirty face, unamused. Sunshine bursts in a giggle fit next to me at the sight of the multi ghouls' antics.
“Hey pretty thing, will you join us in a cuddle pile in Sodo’s room. Perchance?”

“YOU CAN’T JUST SAY PERCHANCE!” I gasp dramatically, making the two burst out laughing, I couldn't hold back either. When the laughter and giggling died down we collectively made our way to Sodo’s den, where the rest of the pack was waiting already. They welcome us with open arms, we dropped ourselves in the warm pile of fur, melting in the embrace of our packmates. The radio was blaring the new songs of the album Prequelle, they came out good.
Melted in the bliss of a cuddle pile I drifted off to sleep. Finally a good sleep.

I wake up to the sound of the alarm, multiple groans fill the room and a claw emerges from the pile to smack away the blaring thing. Blinking away the sleep from my eyes I try to push Aether off of me, who in turn only clamps down harder. “Aether let go”, “hmmpf no”. Luckily Mountain grabs the quintessence ghoul by the horns and pulls him away, the big ghoul lets out a sound of protest but melts again in the arms of Mountain. I thank the earth ghoul and swiftly leave the room. Entering my room I search through the piles of dirty clothes and dirty dishes for something to wear. I end up wearing one of Omega's hoodies and some worn out jeans.

And again I stand before his room, rapidly knocking my knuckles against the wooden door. A loud clanging could be heard from inside, the door opens and a panting Copia stands before me. He looks like a mess, his hair sticking up everywhere, smears of make-up around his eyes and lips and his cassock creased and wrinkled.

“What the fuck happened to you?” I ask bewildered, Copia leans on the door frame still panting and waves an arm behind him. “I overslept, then one of my rats got loose and I tripped over something”. I look over his shoulder and his room is indeed a fucking mess, then I look him up and down. Satan, he looks terrible. “Come on, you can’t meet Sister like this”. I don’t want to help him, but since he seems incapable and I'm the only one around, I have to. I usher him back inside his room, hands on the small of his back, roughly guiding him to his bathroom.

I sit him down on the closed toilet and start rummaging through his cabinets, my eyes catch something small glimmering in the far corner, but I choose to ignore it. Copia fidgets quietly behind me, picking on the rims of his nails. With a triumphant sound I locate the make up wipes, turning around and I mention him to look up at me. I grab his chin and carefully wipe the excess of the make-up around his eyes and lips, I can't believe I'm doing this for him. I scrunch my nose in concentration, trying to fight back the thoughts swirling in the back of my mind. It’s still all his fault, he shouldn’t be here, I should be helping with Terzo’s makeup.

Mismatched eyes blink up at me and a soft cough helps me out of my thoughts. “Ghoul, you okay?” I didn't realise I was growling and quickly straightened myself, clearing my throat and muttering a quick sorry. The cardinal's make-up looks a lot better now, but his hair is still a problem, so I hand him a comb. He quickly makes work of his hair, combing it back neatly.

With him finally cleaned up we walk out his bathroom, he finds his little hat and puts it on. He stays quiet when we walk outside to the car, he stays quiet the whole ride there, why am I even here?
“Is it okay if we go to the store quickly? I need some flowers for her.” he asks, keeping his eyes on the road, I nod softly. “I don’t care, you do you.” Now he looks at me, with a soft confused look in his eyes. “Why are you so distant, compared to the rest of the ghouls?” I snarl a soft warning, crossing my arms and swishing my tail irritated. “No, seriously Atlas, you’re my personal ghoul according to Sister, eh? and you aren't exactly acting like that?”
I stay quiet, turning my head to look outside the window, my horns bumping against it.

“Fine then, stay quiet”. He sounds kind of disappointed, his brows furrowed and lips turned down in a frown.
The car stops in front of a retail store and we both step out, Copia was lost in his own world again. He hums a little tune and mumbles something in Italian when he stumbles over a stone, the tingle of the bell spooks him a bit and he starts picking the leather of his gloves.
He wanders over to the flower section, while I browse the snacks and magazine side of it, wanting to be away from him for a second.

That's when a certain picture catches my eye, the cover of the Metal hammer magazine. I pick it up and look at the nauseating picture of Cardinal Copia holding a bloodied Terzo’s head. I get sick, holding my hand in front of my mouth and tears spring in my eyes. The Cardinal in the picture looks back at me with a cold stare, Nihil pointing in the background. What the fuck, how could he, when even did this happen. I try to recall the last moment I saw Terzo’s body, but couldn’t remember ever seeing stitches around his neck.

Seething with anger and hatred one hundred times stronger than before, I walk to Copia and hold the magazine in front of his nose. “Care to explain yourself? I question him harshly, a low growl in the back of my throat. He chokes and stutters on his words, “ah, fuck Atlas, I’m so so sorry. She ordered me too.” the excuses came tumbling out of his mouth, his eyes flicking between my face and the picture. I bare my teeth and snap to his face, “I absolutely fucking hate you, you awful piece of shit!” I could see tears spring to his eyes, half jumbled words and sounds leaving his mouth, his hands rapidly moving around him. “Atlas, please?” he cries softly, I pay it no mind, my thoughts clouded with hate. I was lucky that the retail shop was in the middle of nowhere, the couple of people that were here in the first place already left.
“I don’t fucking CARE, you’re absolutely worthless and pathetic,” Copias shoulders slump, his eyes brimmed with tears, he tries his best to not let them fall. His mouth opened in a soft ‘oh’ and the hurt that took over his whole body language made me feel kind of bad.

I turn around, leaving the magazine by the counter and walk to the car. I wait for him to buy the flowers so we can finally meet Sister. The rest of the car ride is silent, except for the occasional hiccup or sob from Copia, who so desperately is trying to hide it.
It’s all his own fault.

Chapter Text

“So, you going to open the door or what?”
We stood before the hospital for 5 minutes already and I am growing a bit impatient, my eyes flicking to the nervous Copia. He walks to the door and turns around, using his butt to shuffle it open. I pinch the bridge of my nose in disappointment but follow him anyways, he politely closes the doors once we are inside and strides over to the front desk. Awkwardly he leans on the counter, I stand stoic behind him, furrowing my brow and sweeping my tail.

“Hello, how’d you do?” Copia laughs awkwardly, the lady behind the desk laughs sarcastically in response. “I’m guessing those flowers aren’t for me?” she made me snigger, Copia just made a few long weird sounds before saying no.

“Miss Imperator? She’s down the hall,” she gestures vaguely with her head in the direction of Sisters room. Copia nodded his head, “great, great, thank you very much. Have a nice day huh,” the lady overlaps him, mocking him, “hmmm, yes you have a nice day. Okay hahaha”
Copia gestures to me to follow him after muttering an angry ‘cool’.

Walking inside Sisters room Copia opens his arms theatrically, “tadaaaa,” his exclaim made me roll my eyes.

“Ooh cardinal”
“Sister” Copia bows to her
“Cardinal”, Nihil wasn’t happy to see him
“Papa?”
“Cardinal!”

Sister looks expectedly to Cardinal, he nervously looks around, his gaze landing on me, “Atlas!”
“Leave me out of it,” I growl at him. He turns around again, and awkwardly hands over the flowers he bought for Sister. Awkwardly he tries to start a conversation, beginning about Sisters weight. Sister did look different after lying in bed for six months, but it looked like she healed well. The door opened, making me yelp when it hit me in my back. A nurse walks in with her hands full of hospital stuff, sister happily exclaiming about the fact we were just in time for her unveiling. Slowly the nurse starts taking away her bandages, all of us looking in anticipation. Her face is revealed and she looks completely different, almost unrecognizable.

“Wowww!” Nihil just looked starstruck, like he fell in love again.
“Yess sister, honestly, your accident has done you all the good,” came Copia’s response.
I look at her from head to toe, the change made me uncomfortable. She wasn’t the sister I grew up with, it can’t be. Sister meets my gaze curiously, “what do you think ghoul?” I gulp slightly, should I tell the truth or lie. “It looks good,” she seems satisfied with that and focuses her attention again on Copia. Her gaze turns stern, Copia cowers slightly, he refrains himself so quickly you’d miss it if you blinked.

“Well Cardinal, you always think of everything except the task at hand. I’m about to re-enter the ministry and you’re going to have to shape up,” her finger found the trembling man's face. Nihil protested, not agreeing that he’s ready, but sister shut him up.

Copia straightened himself, he still looks nervous though and starts fidgeting with the sash from his black cassock . “Listen, listen, I do understand,” he gestures to himself and it makes me raise an eyebrow. I'm actually impressed that he dares to speak up like that. “And I do accept, is there anything I can do for you right now?”

“well cardinal actually, if you could just announce th-” Copia shushes her, Sister looks downright offended. “Eshshshshshhsssshh eheeehee European tour?” Copia tried his best, convincing Sister that he knew even though she wanted to help. It took a couple of minutes of Copia muttering weird noises before he gave up, throwing his hands up dramatically. “Ah shut, I don't know, I, uh I don't know”, Sister looks at him disappointed, it’s almost like a default state of her face.

“You know what, you know what. You don’t have to tell us right now. I think we should all go home and you tell us when we get there alright?” you could see how desperately he wants to be gone here, his shoulders sagging in relief when Nihil agrees with him. He urges the man on, “hmm? Yeah? Let’s go, okay come on pops,”, and they both walk out, forgetting Sister in her wheelchair. Stifling a laugh I helped her, pushing her and following the two men who were already down the hall.

“You forgot someone,” I yelled quietly, Copia ushered over muttering apology after apology.
“Alright that's enough, help me get her in the car.” Carefully we lifted her in the back seat next to Nihil.

The car ride back was quiet, awkward, with an occasional hiccup or scoff from Nihil. Arriving back at the ministry, Sister reminded us of the upcoming tour, then she turned to me, “you ghoul, you’re tagging along this time. Upon question from almost all the ghouls and the cardinal.” She turns around, not leaving any room for discussion. The cardinal? I turn around to face the man, he was sweating bullets and doing everything in his power to avoid my gaze. “You wanted me to tag along?” the anger in my chest bubbling, the picture from the magazine flashing in my mind, all Copia could do was nod softly. I just turned around and stomped away, I didn't want to hear it.

I opened the door from the ghouls den, walking inside I see Swiss’ head perk up from the sofa, he scrambles upright and follows me to my room. I lay down on my bed and open my arms for Swiss, who immediately plops down on me. He gives me a soft headbutt and continues to nuzzle his face in my neck. “It’s almost been a year since Copia got in the picture. Why haven’t you warmed up to him yet Atlas?” he looks up at me curiously and I sigh, I purposefully didn't tell the new ghouls a lot about the old ghouls. Yes, they know they existed and were part of the band, but they didn’t know what happened or of my relation with Omega, let alone that of me and Terzo. “It’s nothing Swiss, he just irritates me.” I try to switch the topic, but Swiss looks at me sceptically. He knows there is more that I’m not telling.

“Come on Atlas, you can tell me anything,” he pleads, with a soft whine in his voice. I pinch his sides and he giggles. “There’s a reason why I don't say anything, stupid. Now if you don’t shut up you can leave,” he nods and lays his head down again, his breathing slowly evening out and softly twitching, indicating he had fallen asleep. It lulled me in sleep too, comforted by his weight and smell around me.

We got rudely awoken by a loud screech and banging on the door, soft giggles could be heard behind it. The door swung open and almost all the ghouls toppled over inside my room, soft chirps and chitters filling the small space. Swiss groans in annoyance and buries himself deeper in my chest, covering his ears the best he could. “What are you doing guys?” I mumble, sleep evident in my voice.

“We’re nervous and want to spend time with each other, but that isn’t possible when you’re hogging Swiss and Swiss is hogging you,” Cirrus states with her arms crossed and tail swishing. “You jealous fucks, come on then.” I open my arms, shifting Swiss to my side and the ghouls join us on my bed. Luckily I have a fairly big one, since all the ghouls have a big bed, so when a cuddle pile happened we would all fit.

For the next few weeks it was chaos in the ministry, the tour was just a month away and all the preparations made it a mess. The ghouls were the only thing on my mind, making sure they had their outfits and masks and that they know the songs from memory. All of them were nervous messes, snarling and growling when even the slightest thing went wrong.

“Get your filthy paws off my stuff dickhead,” Cumulus snarled at Sodo, the ghoul baring his teeth in response, “then don’t leave all your stuff hanging around.” “Come now ghouls, Sodo don't touch other people's stuff and Cumulus make sure you have everything in your own space, don't kill each other please,” I step between the snarling ghouls, who both huff and turn around. I focus my attention on an overstimulated Swiss, who was hyperventilating in the corner of the area.

“Come little man, let's get you somewhere quiet”, I urge him to stand up and gesture Mountain to help Swiss. Mountain doesn’t talk so Swiss won’t try to claw his face off if he says something wrong. I look around, it seems right now that everything is going smoothly. I need some alone time.

I walk along the halls of the clergy, taking in the comforting feeling again. I trail my claws along the wall, completely lost in thought about the upcoming tour. I was still perplexed that Sister allows me to join and I understand that the ghouls want it, but the cardinal? Haven’t I been clear enough that I don’t want to be anywhere near him, after all the pain he caused me. A creaking sound took my attention, I look up, my ears twitching to find where the sound was coming from. It got louder and louder and there he is, Cardinal Copia on a fucking tricycle. His black cassock flowing elegantly around him as he slowly cycles by, completely oblivious to the fact I'm standing there. He indicates a left turn and almost bumps into me, screeching to a halt.

“Oh I’m sorry dear ghoul, I didn’t see you there,” he nods his head and continues on, riding in a big circle around me. What the fuck. I was just about to walk away when a loud crash was heard, pained groaning quickly following it. Did that man really just crash with a tricycle?
I stride over to the lump that is Copia flailing around on the ground, trying to peel away the tricycle that was wrapped in his cassock. “Do you need help maybe?” “ehh ah uh no, I- I am okay,” I did notice a slight strain in his voice while he heaves himself upright, grabbing the walls like a live-line. “I thought you knew how to drive safely?” I grin amused and grab the man around his waist to stabilize him. This was the most contact we ever had apart from when I’m fixing his make up.

“Ahem, so uh how is packing going?” He tried to switch the conversation, smoothing out his cassock and trying everything to hide his blush. “Well, kinda, the ghouls will go feral soon from the stress and anticipation, they’re almost killing each other every waking second, but besides that things go smoothly.” I had to keep myself in, to just have a normal small talk with him without the want or need to rip his throat out.

“I do have to admit I'm also quite nervous for the tour, it’s my first one ever.” He bites his lip, a little drop of blood rising to the surface that was quickly removed with a dash of his tongue. “Don’t worry Cardinal, you’re going to do just fine and Aether, Sodo and I are experienced. We will help you all.” I give him a soft pat on the shoulder and he nods in thanks, after an awkward pause we both say our goodbyes and leave in the opposite direction, the creaking of his tricycle slowly growing distant.

That man gets weirder and weirder, why is he riding that thing at his grown age. You could say the same about his behaviour, but almost all the ghouls are just as childish so I can't blame him.
I wander further in the halls from the ministry, somehow ending up on the second level by the papal suites. The four doors stare at me hauntingly, mocking me, asking me to come inside and be reminded of things that were. I walk to a big black door with three golden stripes embedded on it, Terzo’s room. Since Terzo’s death I have avoided his room at all cost, only coming up here to collect Copia when needed. The door is unlocked and I steadily push it open, it creaks slightly in its hinges and a wave of Terzo’s old cologne hits me. My eyes start to water and I don't know if it is because of how strong the smell is or the fact that I forgot how Terzo smelled.

Oh fucking hell, why am I doing this to myself. I step foot inside his room, taking in the surroundings, a room stuck in time. Everything was exactly as it was since the last time I left that room, meaning that Terzo never even got a chance to relax in his own bed after the tour. I tiptoe further, leaving the door slightly agape and start walking to his desk. It is still filled with unfinished paperwork, scattered over every single inch. Tears brimmed in my eyes, memories flooding back.

Why him?

Why all of them?

I light one of the candles, the soft glow illuminating the room with a comforting light and I sit down at the desk. I look around, my eyes landing on one of the shelves from one of the cupboards that are lining the wall, a smiling Terzo, surrounded by his ghouls, stares back at me. I lean over to pick up the framed picture, tracing his smiling face with my finger, he looked so happy there.

A burning feeling started behind my eyes, tears flooding over my cheeks and my chest heaved with soft sobs and hiccups. Tears landed on the picture, dripping down the frame and landing on the floor. I grit my teeth, a mixture between a sob and a growl leaving my throat and I hug the little frame against my chest. For a while I just sat there, sobbing quietly, I didn't want him to be dead, why did he have to be dead?

Everything was just piling up, the stress spilling over. I didn’t have a single break to actually focus on myself since everything went ape-shit, well except for the fact I bed-rotted for a good six months. I just want to be in their arms and sleep the stress away. I noticed I started hyperventilating, the panic and realisation settling in and my brain started spiralling and spiralling. A soft knocking made me flinch up, wiping away my tears and hiding the picture in a drawer under the desk.

“Ahem, excuse me?” I know that voice, it is Copia. The man in question pokes his head through the gap, black-framed eyes blinking confused at me. Aggressively I wipe away the remaining evidence that I've been crying and stand up, tail swishing behind me. “I am sorry, I know I'm not supposed to be here, I’ll leave,” I bow my head in apology, hoping he won’t go to Sister to snitch me. He puts his hands up, they’re ungloved for a change, and he steps inside carefully. “No it’s okay, I just wanted to check up since I saw that the door was open,” his voice was soft and smooth, lacking the normal edge of fear to it.

“And I believe that you, for a fact, were allowed inside here,” I blink, head tilting to the side, how does he know? He walks over to Terzo’s bed and sits down, I growl, but he just raises an eyebrow and pats the spot next to him. Who is this and what happened to Cardinal Copia? It seems like all his anxiety and fear disappears the moment he steps in this room, reluctantly I sit down next to him, still keeping my fair distance. I finally could get a look at his hands, his nail beds were a disaster, fully picked and scratched open. My gaze travels up to his chest, now clothed with a thick red hoodie, and up to his face that was still adorned with black face paint and lipstick.

It's comfortably quiet for a while, the first time since we met each other. He sighs and starts picking at his nails. “Why do you hate me?” those fucking mismatched eyes look at my face, quickly flicking away and a strange sound of protest leaves my throat. I just stay quiet, I didn't want to spoil the moment by blowing up on him. He notices the change in mood and clears his throat.

“How are you feeling about the tour?” I decided to change the subject. I know he asked it before, but I genuinely don’t know what to talk about with him. I wrap my tail around his hands to make him stop picking, the sound irritated me extremely. He flinches before gently grabbing a hold of it. “Quite nervous actually, I'm scared to disappoint Nihil. He just keeps saying that I’m not ready-” he starts rambling, having seemingly forgotten about our earlier conversation, his fingers mindlessly plucking at my tail and smoothing it out. “And besides disappointing Nihil, Sister is also expecting much of me, so I’m just really nervous about fucking everything up.” there was definitely something more under this, the slight tremble in his voice returning when talking about Sister. I just nod along, humming softly. “You’re going to be just fine, same goes for the ghouls." I try to comfort him as best as I can, pushing my initial feelings about him to the back of my mind.

“I can tell you what Terzo did on his first ritual,” I offer, snickering slightly at the memory. “Oh yes please, I would like to know.” “It's bad, he was so nervous, trembling and hyperventilating. He started rambling to the crowd and for some reason started talking about how good sex was with ghouls.” he cackles and images from Terzo came flooding back, the memory of the magazine with Terzo’s bloodied head. I close my eyes and breathe heavily from my nose, playing it off as a laugh when Copia looks at me again.

“Well, I hope I won’t do that,” Copia giggles, wiping a tear from his eye, carefully to not smudge his make up. I hum in agreement and we fall in a comfortable silence again, a soft giggle or hiccup occasionally breaking it.

I look at the clock, shocked at how much time has passed and I'm sure that the ghouls might have killed each other. “I think it’s time for me to go, I need to check up on the ghouls,” I slap my knees and stand up, shaking myself off and freeing my tail from Copia’s grasp. His sleeve rides up, a faded red mark took my attention, but before I can point it out he pulls his sleeve down in a quick reflex. I just smile and he smiles back awkwardly. “Sleep well Copia,” I nod him goodbye and exit the room, leaving the man alone to his thoughts.

I brace myself, pushing open the door from the ghouls den, expecting a world war disaster and a few dead ghouls. I gasp in surprise when I'm met with a fully cleaned living room, the ghouls calmly watching a tv show, fully submerged in their own world. Promptly Mountain's head emerged from the pile and an excited bleat leaves his mouth when his eyes land on me. All eyes land on me, some excited, some filled with murder and I back away, not wanting to be jumped by a whole pack of full grown ghouls.

“Where were you?” Sunshine’s accusing voice cuts through the tension, “I just needed some alone time, you don’t know how exhausting it can be to make sure a whole pack of ghouls don’t murder each other,” I mutter, Sunshine's gaze is unamused and she snaps her fingers. At once three ghouls leap at me, I couldn’t identify them if I tried, it’s a blur of swishing tails and pointy horns. One of them headbutts me, making my head knock back against the wall with a grunt leaving my mouth. I curl in on myself, my hand shooting up to cover over the painful area.

“Sorry,” a ghoul laps at my face, of course it is Swiss that manages to do that. The two other ghouls, who I made out to be Rain and Sodo, pinned me down and nuzzled their noses in my neck. “What the fuck is this supposed to mean?” my breath hitches slightly at the feeling of their warm breath against my neck. Swiss straddles me, he leans his head down, looking at me through hooded eyes. He lifts a hand to cradle my cheek, wetting his lips. Fuck, I whimper at the feeling of calloused claws raking over my clothed thighs.

“We need you Atlas,” Sodo murmurs in my ear, making me shiver. “Fuck yeah, I noticed that. What the fuck did I miss” I try to even out my breathing, holding Swiss’ waist to ground myself. I look over his shoulder, the sight of Sunshine sitting on Mountain's lap and making out with each other made me sigh and dig my nails in Swiss’ flesh. The ghoul jerks his hips and bites back a moan before dropping his head on my shoulder, a perfect spot to start making out with Rain.

“You missed the fact that like three of them started their heats and one started a rut,” Aether tries to explain, his breath hitching when Cirrus bites on a particular sensitive spot on his neck. “Swiss wanted to wait for you, so they’re fucking desperate”, his hands rake through Cirrus’ curls, pulling her head up to smash their lips together in a searing kiss.

Swiss looks up again, Rain whining from the loss. “So what do you think, pretty boy?” Swiss purred, his thumb pulling at my lower lip, “ready to fuck some ghouls?”

Chapter Text

that statement made me snicker, he can’t ever keep it serious. I answer by grabbing the back of his head, leaning up, but pausing right before our lips touch. He snarls in frustration and slams our lips together. I feel drunk, my heart pounding against my ribs, melted between the three bodies surrounding and caressing me.

Swiss hands rake through my hair, pulling slightly, I gasp and he takes the opportunity to press his tongue in my mouth. Sodo keeps sucking and licking at my neck, I ghost my fingers along the base of his tail, where it meets his back. He mindlessly ruts his hips against my thighs, purring loudly. I break my kiss with Swiss, a string of saliva connecting us and I turn to Sodo, seeing Swiss lick at his lips from the corner of my eye.

The small fire ghoul in front of me whimpers softly, his half lidded eyes focussed on my lips while licking his own. I pull lightly at his tail and he drops his head on my shoulder, his hips stuttering against mine. In haze he starts licking my neck, spreading a warm feeling down to my crotch. “Fucking hell guys, we can’t fuck here on the floor.” I push the annoyed ghoul off my lap, a low whine leaving his throat. I stand up, holding the wall for support and take Sodo with me.

I was in too much of a daze to notice anything happening in the living room, stumbling to my room with the three ghouls hot on my heels. I leave the door slightly open so the other ghouls know they can come any time they want. two clawed hands circle around my wrist and I’m pulled back against someone's chest, my knees buckle when he grabs my waist, digging in my flesh. Sodo takes the opportunity to drop on his knees in front of me, the sight of it sending blood down, making my cock throb in my trousers. I lean back against the other ghouls chest, who I made out to be Swiss, moaning when Sodo nuzzles against my thighs.

I hear a soft whimper coming from my bed, looking over I see Rain laying on my bed. His hand down his pants as he strokes himself, he looks at us with lust filled eyes, seemingly content in his situation. My attention snaps back when rough hands slide up the hem of my shirt, I arch my back and look up at Swiss’ smiling face.

“Kiss me.”

I don’t have to ask twice, he holds my chin, our fangs clicking together and tongues fighting for dominance. Drool drips down my chin as he moans in my mouth, his claw brushing over my nipple, sending sparks through my whole body. How the fuck does he know what to do to make me lose my shit, who the fuck told him that.

The guilty one, the very ghoul who apparently told Swiss my dirty secrets, made himself known at that moment. He nimbly flicks open my trousers, his claws flicking over my bulge. He looks up at me with a smug look and nuzzles right beside where I want it most, it makes my cock jump and leak with want.

“Unholy fuck, Sodo stop teasing,” the fire ghoul stares up at me, grinning, his claws finally brushing over my bulge. My head tipped back from the contact, groaning. I rake my hands through Sodo’s soft blonde hair, who finally decided to pull down my boxers enough to free my dick. I inhale sharply through my nose at the cold air hitting my dick and hear Swiss moan at the sight of it.

Sodo digs his nails in my thighs before he gives the tip of my dick a kitten lick, holy fuck, I start purring at the feeling and completely melt in Swiss’ arms. The big ghoul started humping his dick against my ass, biting and licking at my collar bones while keeping straight eye contact with Sodo. then Sodo takes the head of my cock in his mouth, softly swirling his tongue around it. I absolutely lost it, pulling at his hair, it takes everything in me not the downright choke him on my dick. Suddenly another tongue joins, licking and sucking around my balls and I make a strangled noise, somewhere between a moan and a growl.

I cry out, all the sensations coursing through my veins almost too much. Sodo makes eye contact and hollows his cheeks, sucking my dick further in his mouth. Almost deepthroating, he swallows around it and i almost collapse weren’t it for Swiss holding me up. I can feel my orgasm building up, so I grab Sodo by his hair and pull him off. He whines and Rain looks up confused, both their lips swollen and red.

“Get on the bed, both of you, naked.” I command them and they both scurry eagerly, I turn around and yanks Swiss’ horns to make him look up. “You too big man,” he nods and joins the ghouls on the bed, both already naked and eagerly kissing each other.

The moment I climb on my bed I'm surrounded by desperate hands and mouths, biting, licking, touching and grabbing everywhere. I don’t know how, but in the heat of the moment I ended up on my back, this time Sodo straddling me. The small ghoul was biting around my chest, licking sensitive nipples, making me arch my back off the bed and closer to his mouth. His hands were occupied with my dick, slowly jacking me off, my thighs shaking at the pace. His other hand was behind him, fingering himself.

His little breaths he puffs against my hard nipples are driving me crazy, together with the want and need to fuck him. After what felt like hours he deems himself prepped enough and aligns my dick with his desperate hole. I desperately dig my nails in the plush of his thighs at the feeling of his slick, he’s sliding his dick over his entrance, teasing both me and himself.

His back arches so prettily when he finally sinks down, I jolt at the heat engulfing me. He clenches his muscles, panting harshly, getting used to my size. “Oh fuck,” his soft mutters of ecstasy are music to my ears, he isn’t really that vocal so i take everything i can get. He leans down, his dick trapped between our stomachs and he shivers at the sensation. He bumbles something incoherent and starts moving, huffing softly in my ear. “Hmmm you feel so good in me,” his hips circle, humping softly.

“So deep inside me.”

I growl, low in my throat at the feeling of his walls around me, he’s so hot and tight, unholy shit.

Seemingly done with the slow pace he sits up again, pushing his hands against my chest. Sodo lifts himself up, only the tip still inside and slams himself down. His mouth falls open in a silent moan, his eyes rolling back in his head and he starts a ruthless pace. His thighs clench around mine, I can feel the strong muscles beneath my fingertips, his sweat making it glinster softly. I moan loud, weakly trying to meet his thrust by lifting my hips, but failing miserably. Shocks of pleasure are coursing through every part of my body, my fingertips tingling. I want to look at the sight in front of me, his beautiful dick bobbing up and down with his thrusts, but a particular hard slam made my brain short-circuit and my head fell back down.

Sodo’s thrust starts to slow down, he’s babbling softly and drool slipping from his lips. He’s tired.
Carefully I lift him up, he whines at the empty feeling and grabs at my arms. He keeps whining and whimpering pathetically as I'm laying down, wanting to keep close to me.

I align my dick again with his hole, feeling the slick drip out of him like a waterfall. Softly and slowly I push inside again, his beautiful, watery eyes looking up at me as his mouth is a pretty ‘o’ shape. He scratches at my shoulders, pulling me close to slot our lips together. The kiss is lustful, desperate, but slow and full of drool and tongue. His fangs cut my lip and it starts bleeding, he eagerly laps it up, moaning at the taste. His ankles crossed over my lower back, indicating he wants me to move and who am I to deny him.

He lurches when I set a hard pace, a strangled sound leaving his throat as he clamps to me like a lifeline. Oh how i missed this, how i missed fucking him so hard he becomes stupid, only wanting a dick to fill him and to breed him. “You’re so pretty under me like this, like the little slut that you are,” he whimpers an incoherent answer, biting at my shoulder. I can feel him drawing blood, he suckles softly, lavishing the taste and feeling.

I moan lowly and continue to pound him in the mattress, his little whines and whimpers driving me harder and harder. I can feel him clenching around me, his thighs trembling and flexing. I shift my weight to one elbow, positioning myself so I could clumsily stroke his dick, still trying to keep my pace. At this feeling a full moan rips from his throat, sputtering little pleas. “Please, please I'm so close please letmecum,” I kiss his cheek, licking the tears that began falling from his eyes. “Of course pretty boy, cum for me.”

It takes a few more hard thrusts for him to completely tense around me, clenching so hard I could hardly move. Hot and thick ropes of cum spurt from his dick, coating our chests and some of it even reached his chin. The cum was hot, almost burning and it made me whine from pleasure. I keep thrusting, chasing my orgasm. The ghoul under me starts shivering and writhing from oversensitivity, his claws scraping over my back. He bites, teeth sinking in the flesh over my collarbone and that was the push I needed. Shockwaves of pleasure and fire ripple through my body as I bury my dick deep inside him and fill him with my seed.

“Do you want my knot?” i groan through my teeth, “fuck yes!” At the affirmation I pushed deeper, I could feel it swell. Sodo felt almost impossibly tighter around it, he cried out at the feeling. Finally after what felt like forever I collapse on Sodo, who answers with a big oof. We lay there, panting, sweaty and sticky, but content and fucked out. Behind us we hear the low growl of Swiss and a screech from Rain, indicating they also reached their finish and they plop down next to us. Swiss also knotted inside Rain, who nuzzles against his neck, yawning loudly.

We spend the rest of the day basking in the afterglow, locked together. Soft kisses and talks were shared. After like 6 hours our knots deflated and we could dislodge ourselves from our partners.

“So, who’s ready for a shower?” I ask excitedly and a chorus of happy chirps fill the air.
We wash each other off, soft touches and moans filling the air. Slowly other ghouls wander inside the communal shower, all fucked through and happy. Cirrus was limping slightly, mountain and Aether who followed her were littered with bruises and bitemarks. They look like they both are still in a somewhat subspace, so we immediately start doting and loving them. Remembering to rub some ointment on their bruises after the shower.

Loud purring filled the small bedroom, the open window allowing a soft breeze to fill the room. The bed is filled with soft bodies, sleeping soundly together, blissful and ready for the tour to start. They formed their bond.