Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

OUaD 1

Age sixteen.

Y/n heads home with the others. Her stomach is churning as she does so. The latest nightmare was disturbing. Of course she always had nightmares. Nightmares of war. Nightmares of pain and blood. Nightmares of being tortured.

"Nightmare?" Y/n looks over. Nodding. Scared that if she spoke she would puke. Something she had been...

Her foster siblings watch as she moves to the side. Cooper makes a face and Lila stands and waits for y/n to be done.

"Do you need me to get mom?" Y/n shakes her head. Shes thankful that not much came out. She waves Lila off. Telling the younger girl to head on home. Lila is unsure for the moment. But the older girl can defend herself.

It takes some time before she continues on to the house. Laura was on the front porch waiting for her.

"Nightmare?" Y/n nods. Laura gave her a sad smile.

"Go to the kitchen then y/n. I have it set up for you." Y/n nods. Hissing as she feels her soulmates pain. His energy is lowering and she can feel everything that he is.
She had found through herbology that a combination of herbs can lessen the effects. She kept at it. It had been a while since she had seen her mother. While Laura was a wonderful woman and a great mom as well, y/n wanted to see hers.

The glass is on the table at her seat. Sitting down hard her stomach churned. Taking a small sip. Letting her body tell her when to continue. Or if it was able to continue. Given how she just was sick she hoped that her body could take a bit of it. Numb it a little bit.

"Aunt Nat!" Y/ns thoughts are broken by Lila's screams. She smiles. Feeling for herself for once. Glad that she can see her mom.

Laura played defense for y/n until she got her stomach settled. The poor girl has gone through some bad luck for the last six years.

"Is..." Natasha asks. Worried for her adopted daughter. Laura sighs. Rubbing her swollen belly.

"It's been rough for her Nat. Very rough."
"Where is she?"
"Kitchen. Nat, I need to warn you she doesn't look good."

Before Natasha has a chance to ask the sound of something wrong hits the groups ears. Everyone looks over to the archway to the kitchen. Where a young woman stands. Eyes locked on Steve.

Steve feels his stomach churn for some reason. Fear and shock run through his system. He is a little confused. At least until he feels nothing coming from his soulmate.

Everyone jerks as the young lady just falls. Nat and Clint rush into action. Natasha is fretting over her.

"What happened?"
"Who is she?"
"Better yet, why did she look straight at Steve terrified. As if she saw a ghost."

"That's because to her, she did." Natasha has y/ns head on her lap. Clint stands up to look at his wife.

"They have been getting more intense lately. But y/n has been having nightmares about you Steve. You and this other man with a metal left arm. Her nightmares make her lose her appetite and be sick more often than not." Laura has a soft voice and gaze on her face.

"These nightmares, how bad were they? Has she told you?" Natasha is calm but worried. Moving her daughter's hair to the side. Taking in how unhealthy she looked.

"It started out..." Laura looks over to the other two kids. "Lila, Cooper, would you please go to your rooms?"
"Sure mom. Come on Cooper. You don't want to hear this." Lila takes her brothers hand and they head up to their rooms.

"It was about World War Two. Details that, I believe, Steve would be the only one to know. Shes written them out. Drew them out the best she could. I have her talking to a professional. But they aren't doing much for her."

"Hold up. She's been having nightmares about cap?" Tony can't believe this. "Also, who is she?"

"My adopted daughter." Natasha speaks up. Y/n groans and mutters a few words in Russian. Natasha smoothed her hair.

"No worries. It won't happen. Do you think you can stand?" She shakes her head. Natasha moves and the pair sit up. Natasha holds her to her chest.

"Guys, this is my daughter, y/n. You know Steve already the other blond is Thor and the man next to him is Tony and Bruce." The team is surprised to hear Natasha be soft with her. Holding her.
It takes y/n a minuet to land on a language. One of many. She blinks her eyes open to look at the team. Oddly Natasha can't understand what she is saying.

"I don't understand her." Everyone is surprised to find Steve replying to her in the same language. Shocking everyone. The pair go back and forth. Steve moves closer, going to his hunches before her. Steve's voice is soft. At one point she has tears streaming down her face. Turning her face into Natasha's chest.

"I'm sorry." He looks up to Nat.

"What were you two talking about?" Natasha is worried and concerned for her daughter.

"Her dreams."

•

Y/n wakes up and has a little trouble breathing. She starts shaking. Moving from the bed she gets her comfort sweatshirt and throws it on. Heading down to the kitchen.
Little did she know Steve woke up around the same time. Not being able to sleep. When he hears her padding down to the kitchen he decides to fallow her. Wondering why she was down there.

"You should be asleep." She looks over to Steve as he enters.

"So should you." He is a little surprised to hear her speaking English.

"I'm multi lingual. Something mom insisted on."
"And you speak Gaelic like you grew up with it." She smirks. He takes a seat near her.

"What are you guys doing here anyway?"
"We have an issue in New York. Need a place to lay low with."

"So you came over here? The middle of nowhere?"

"Yeah. It was the best plan any of us could think of." She nods. Both of them trying to avoid the unspoken words.

"I don't know why I kept dreaming about you. Why I keep dreaming about your life." She starts the conversation. Looking at the glass before her.

"It couldn't have been easy. Living with that." He looks up seeing her nod.

"It wasn't. I barfed the first time I saw one of your photos. Right in the middle of class. Thankfully I was by the door and the trash can."
"Is that kind of reaction normal for you?"

"Yeah. It is. But I have a way to minimize it."
"There is more to it. Isn't there?"
"Yeah. There is. But I don't feel comfortable talking about it. Half red isn't it?"

"Yeah. It is."
"Your color is blue isn't it?"
"Yeah. It is. Why?" Steve is confused. Y/n reaches down into her shirt and brings a paper out. Handing it to him folded. Steve unfolds it. Looking at the tiny red half filled star on the infant.

"What..."
"You're not the only one I've been dreaming of. I some times dream of this man. He has a metal arm and half a blue star. Whenever mom would come visit..." she stops herself. Shaking her head.

"This is too strange. I can't have a relationship with you Steve. Not when I have no clue who I am. The age gap between us is too much. I'm sorry."
"I understand. I won't push you to have a relationship. When you feel ready to talk to me you can."

"Your not pushing?" She looks up at him. Now that she has a chance to see him for herself. In real life. She sees an age to him. But a kindness as well.

"No. I'm not. To be honest I'm not ready to meet you either. I don't have the right head space."
"Ok."

This time Steve looks at her. Seeing her fear and caution. Her eyes holding things within that he could never see. Never realize.

"I will try to be careful moving forward."
"You don't have to worry about me. First hint of trouble I can mute the bond."

"You can mute the bond?"
"Yeah. It's a herbal blend. My own. Helped earlier."

"You should be in bed." Y/n turns and sees Natasha.

"Can't. Never could if I have THAT dream." She turns back around and holds her hand out for the paper from Steve. The pair are careful not to touch finger tips. Both of them holding onto the secret truth. Though knowing Natasha she listened in.

"How often have you had that dream?" Natasha goes to sit next to her daughter.

"Often. Too often." Natasha pulls her to her side. Y/n lands her head on her mom's shoulder.

"The worst part of it mom, is I can still hear and feel the flames. The burning around me." Y/ns voice becomes faint. Her eyes closed ss tears run down her face.

•

The next day the team is sitting in the dinning room talking battle plans. Y/n comes in with water for everyone.

"Thanks kid."
"No problem."
"Shouldn't you be with your tutor?" Thor asks. The other kids are off to school. Yet she remained.

"I go to school online. Laura managed to help me skip a grade. Just finishing up my last year. I already have a few applications out for full rides to a few places. But I'm not entirely sure what I want to do."

"Laura mentioned your workshop."
"She would." Y/n sighs. Shaking her head.

"You don't have a nuke in there do you?" Tony smirks. Looking at her.

"Close enough." Everyone freezes and turns to look at her.

"You what!" Natasha stands up. Looking at her daughter. Whom rolled her eyes.

"I'm half joking mom."
"Show me. Now!"

Y/n nods and Natasha fallows y/n out. Next to stand is Steve and Tony. Before Thor and Clint are right behind them.

"Holy shit....." Tony is wide eyed as he looks around. Her workshop is well organized. A black suit with a gold half mask is hanging up.

"It's not that impressive."
"You did all this? Clint looks over to her. "How?"

"How do you think?" She points to her head. A tired expression on her face.

"How did you get the stuff to do this?"
"Classified." Steve can feel her become unsettled. He says a few words at which she nods. Steve is worried. But keeps it to himself.

"What all can the suit do?"
"Water proof, shock proof. Built in triple filter face mask. This thing can take a lickin and keep on tickin." She goes to stand nest to Tony. Looking at it.

"Padded and armed to the gills. It has several places for supplies and is equipped with a first aid kit as well as voice changer. Fits only me and I burned the blueprints after."

"Tony Stark. Looking for a job?"
"Tony...." Natasha watches as Tony tries to recruit her daughter. Steve on the other hand can feel her stomach bottom out. Her blood pool south.

"Did you say Stark? As in Howard Stark?"
"Huh? Yeah why do you...." Tony doesn't finish his question as she runs out of the room. Steve stands there. Watching her. Feeling her get sick. Steve moves closer to the door as Natasha goes over to her daughter. The pair talk in Russian. Just for a little bit. Then she attempts to speak a little louder for Steve.

Steve does as he is asked. Finding the picture and going wide eyed. Looking at the details of the picture. Details so well done that it was as if she was there. Looking at them. Holding the gun herself.

"Tony?"
"Yeah?"
"How sure where you that your parents where killed in a crash?"
"Why do you ask?" Tony crossed his arm as Steve comes over. Holding the picture out to Tony. He takes it and Thor and Clint both look over his shoulder.

"Is lady y/n able to see the past?" Thor asks softly.

"No. Not entirely." Steve is the one who answers Thor.

"Then how?"
"Not...dreams..." y/n is soft. She's shaking. A wave of cold horror washing over her from Steve.

"Your nightmares. Are you saying that they are memories?" Steve is extremely confused. It wasn't possible. Could it?

"Da."

At the word the area falls silent. Clint looks over to Steve. As does Natasha. But before she can say a word y/n shutters. Natasha goes to rub her back.

"I want this to end mama. I want this to stop." Y/n was reduced to her six year old self when the nightmares began. They were vague at first. But now became more defined.
Everyone heard her. Steve had no idea. He had only been free for a bit. But again, she keeps referring to a man with a metal arm.

Steve goes back to where he found the picture. Bringing them all out he starts to look though them. Natasha, upon hearing the paper, turns to look at Steve. Moving to scold him for going through her daughter's drawings. Only for several things at happen.

Natasha stopped when she saw Steve face.
Y/ns tears picked up pace.
Steve found the picture that he was unknowingly looking for.

Holding it he turns. Not exactly facing the mother, daughter duo on the ground.

"Do you know who she means by 'the man with the metal arm?'"
"Yeah I do."
"How do you know him?"
"We worked together in the past."
"Before or after?"
"Before." Clint is the only one who is shocked. But keeps silent.

"Is this him?" Steve turns the page to Natasha and Y/n. Y/n is actively crying now. Muttering under her breath. Apologizing constantly.

"Yes. That is him." Steve turns the picture around. Looking at it again before he goes storming off. Leaving most of the people confused.

"What just happened?" Tony is confused. Y/n speaks in that weird language that only Steve knows. Steve...and Thor.

"The man with the metal arm is her soulmate. She's been reliving his life through dreams and nightmares."

Chapter Text

OUaD 2 (once)

Steve can't believe what he just found out. He needed to blow off steam. Fuck! His mind is so screwed up right now. The last memory he had was of self sacrifice. God, fucking, damn near a century, ago. Loosing Bucky felt like days ago. Not years! Now to find out that his soulmate, his second one, had been tortured by living his, their lives through nightmares. She knows them. Not just him. But the man who should be dead. At peace! He knows that they laid him to rest with honors. Full honors! He shouldn't be alive!

And yet....

Y/n curled in on herself as Steve's scream of pain and confusion echos in the building. The three remaining men all flinch at that. Natasha is holding y/n to her the best she could moving to soothe her daughter.

"What do we do now?"
"We focus on Loki for now. Get that done first. Then we carry on with Steve. Help him out."
"What about your daughter Lady Natasha?"

"I'll be ok." Her voice is soft. Her head on her mother's chest. "I have a job. Will have a job. I got my future in mind. I'll be ok. You guys focus on New York and Steve. I'll be ok." Natasha and Clint both share looks.

"If you are sure."
"I am mama. But I can help." Slowly y/n stands up. As does Natasha. Y/n clears her face. Trying to ignore the redness of her eyes. The shadows under her eyes.

"Give me a moment?"

After a few moments she comes back with a few boxes.

"Uncle Clint," The man moves forward. "I have new arrows for you. Bullets for you too mom." She hands the bullets over to her mom and the quiver to her uncle.

"The tips are sharp." Clint nods and draws one out.

"I can upgrade your suit Tony. If you have it on you. I wouldn't be doing much though." She looks over to him.

"I don't have it on me." Tony is a little reluctant to say so. Y/n gets a tick in her jaw. Taking a deep breath.

"Ok. I can at least whip up gauntlets for you. Help you with your pulses." She heads over to the bench. Grabbing what looks like a grande disk.

"This can control anything that it's attached to. It can be hidden under the car." She brings up a video and shows them the testing. "It can also be used for something bigger but I'm not sure how big."

"Thanks. Is..."
"Yeah. Most of this is." Tony offers to take the device. She hands it over.

"There is also this." Y/n holds up another orb. "This is a massive emp. I've been watching the news. Get this where the ships are and they will go down."

•

Y/n is in her work shop watching the news. Seeing everyone fighting Loki. She lets her bond with Steve be. Feeling everything that he is.

"Don't."
"I have to. I can at least try to stop this. Save..." Laura comes over. Seeing y/n bow her head.

"Say it y/n. You have been fighting this for years. I think it's time." Y/n takes a deep breath and nods.

"I need to protect my soulmate. I need to protect Steve."

Laura smiles and looks over to the suit.

"Think you got the device working right?" Laura looks back over to her. She takes a deep breath.

"I hope so. I'm about to do a live test." She hits a few buttons. The suits screen vanishes. Leaving the suit in its pod below it. It's open. She takes her shoes off and lays down on the suit. It honestly hurts her getting in and out of it. She takes a few deep breaths.

"Initialize."

Steve feels full body pain for a split second. Just as Loki pops off. He is at knee. Breathing hard. What was that?

You ok cap?" Tony comes down and flips his mask open.

"Yeah, pushed my limits. Any idea where Loki went?"

"No. None of us do. My guess is that he is back on a ship."

Little did they know that Loki was making his way to an abandoned building. Needing a chance to catch his breath. Little did he know that he was being fallowed.

"This isn't something that you would do." Loki grips the staff and spins. The voice sounds mechanical. Coming from the front of him.

"Show yourself! I demand it!" Voices that had no bodies did greatly worry him.

"Is it true that you got Thor to cross dress ?" Loki swung around. Looking around.

"What of it?"
"Thought it would be interesting. See if it was true. Midgard has many stories about your family. Yet none of them depict you to be this vile. Outside of the all-father you are the smartest of them." Loki lowers his defensive stance. Lowering the staff a little bit.

"Is that so?"
"Quite. Many a times making Thor act the fool." Y/n steps around Loki.

"That is a cursed box. I'm sure that you are aware."
"What do you mean?" Loki pulls the staff back and looks around.

"The box and its contents are cursed. Many years ago a secret organization named Hydra got their hands on it. Before it became the box. They alone created the box to use the power that it held. What do you know of Midgrdian history?"

"Not much. Just they you lot have shorter lives and will fight any one over the slightest of differences."
"Fair point. We humans like to believe that we are free. Given our society none of us are truly. All of us working for someone else."

Y/n steps close to Loki and turns the cloaking off.

"Why are you doing this?" Loki looks at the figure then at the staff. Something about there words spoke to him.

"My home was threatened. He said that if I didn't help him he would...." Loki shuts up. Yet y/n understands.

"Your parents. Correct?" He nods.

"He said that the cube was special. That it didn't belong in mortal hands. Never clarified its importance."
"What do you think it is?"
"Power source of some sort."

"You are only half correct. It is a power sieve but it can do so much more."
"Like what?"
"Teleport you. It is hard to control however. Hydra had tried once to use its power to control the world."

"It failed clearly."
"Correct. It did fail. Due to those who stood for what was right. One of those men is the same that you are fighting now." Loki brought out the cube.

"Would this man fight to protect a culture he knows nothing about?"
"That answer, may surprise you."

•

The team is surprised when Loki appears before them. All of them ready to attack or defend. But Loki, his face was unreadable even to his brother.

"This has to be a tra..." before Tony has a chance to say another word Loki throws his, now broken, staff more towards Thor than himself.

"I'm sorry brother. I thought that I was doing the right thing." Stunned didn't even begin to describe how the team felt over the situation.

Thor moves forward. Going to his brother.

"What changed brother?" His voice is soft. Calm and cautious.

"A man. People will always fight for what's right. To defend those who can't. To fight injustice wherever it is." Natasha and Clint both share looks. That sounded like y/n. But she was home in Iowa. Right?

•

Y/n is dead on her feet when she got back. Wearing the suit hurts. That why she doesn't wear it often. Tears kept forming because of the pain. Landing on her back hard. The hard movement jostles her and part of it digs into her back deep. But she negated Loki's invasion. She should be happy with that.
She couldn't do much at the moment. The suit has a built in lock. Twenty four hours minimum. For the moment she just had to grin and bear it. She knows that Laura was going to come check up on her when morning came. But for now. She lets herself float.

".../n?" She blinks and sees Laura nearby. The older woman has a smile on her face.

"You did good y/n. Prevented a massive war from coming on."
"Thanks. But I didn't think that you would be checking up on me until morning." Laura gives her a look and places a cool cloth over her forehead and eyes.

"You live under my roof y/n. Of course I care about you. I know how much you hurt being in that thing. Now rest. You have several hours until you are free."
"Thanks Laura."

•

Steve looks up at the building. Tony had helped him get a place. The neighborhood had greatly changed since he had been there. The government had given the team a good chunk of money for their services to the planet. Steve wanted to tell y/n that he settled and give her his new address. Yet he held off.
The apartment is small and cozy. He didn't have much. A bed and a couch. Some dishes and cook wear. Old sheets over the windows like he did before. Putting the groceries on the counter he has to admit that things did change for the better. And the worse as well.

Pausing at the open fridge he places his hand over his soulmark. It's still red. Still half filled. Sighing he moves over to finish up. This entire thing was a mess. She was too young to be with him. Underage.
A deep shiver runs over him. He could only see those headlines in his darkest nightmares. The headlines. Calling him a predator. Ruining his image.

Now he is glad that they agreed that it wasn't time. That it couldn't be time. True he often wanted to check up on her. Let's face it, Natasha dropped a massive bomb shell on both he and y/n when they met up last.

He sighs. He kinda wanted to make sure that y/n was ok with the revelation. But he didn't know the full story. Only part of it.
Flipping his phone around in his hand he debated if he should call her and ask her what was going on with y/n. His thoughts get interrupted by a knock on the door. Confused he answers it and sees that it's Natasha.

"We need to talk."
"We do."

"So start talking." They settle in the kitchen, Steve is standing and Natasha is on the stool.

"They call him the Winter Soldier. Hydra keeps him locked in cryo stasis whenever they don't need him. We worked together before. But that mission was different.
He and I were meant to send a message. That was it. A house fire. No casualties. That was it. But the mission went...not exactly wrong.

The woman who owned the house kept packing her things and the night she left we set the house on fire. Thing is though...." Natasha takes a deep breath. Closing her eyes for a second.

"She did our job for us. The house was set up to burn throughly. Neither of us knew about y/n."
"She was left alone? In the house?"

Steve felt his heart plummet in his chest. Not wanting to believe this.

"Yes. Y/n was. He was the one who heard her. Who found her. I don't know why, never got a chance to ask him, but he removed his glove. His right glove. Moved the hair she had out of her face. That's when she began to get extremely fussy. The blanket around her shoulder came down and we both saw the soulmark show up.
I offered to keep her safe since the house was beginning to burn harder now. We met up at the safe house. He held a bag of supplies for her. Told me her name and I swore to him that she would be safe."

"Was she?"
"Yes." Natasha nods. Taking another deep breath.

"Yes she was safe. I had a...colleague raise her for a bit. Until she was ten. That's when Clint and Laura came into play. She was their flower girl. Poor girl was scared out of her mind. She knew Clint. But was a little u easy with Laura."

"Did you know about the nightmares?"
"Not exactly. Not at first. She had told me that she missed me. That she didn't feel safe without me near her. It was during one of the stays that I had here that things came to ahead.
I woke up to her screaming. She kept convulsing for a moment. When it finished up she was full on crying. Curled up on herself."

Steve could see how haunted Natasha's face had gotten. How dark.

"She only said a few words. 'His head.' I held her to me as she cried. Held her as she slept in my arms. Something she hasn't done since she was a baby.
In the morning she told me what happened in her dream. That the man with the metal arm had electricity go through him. That they did it to his head."
"They shocked him?"

Steve goes wide eyed. Looking at Natasha. Whom slowly nods.

"That and worse."
"Jesus christ."
"Once she told me that flood gates opened up. She told me everything. Switching languages as she did so. I stayed a bit longer because of it."

"Did you tell her? That what she was dreaming where memories?"
"No. I couldn't. I think seeing you face to face made her realize that her dreams were memories."

"Do you think she's going to be ok with all this?"
"I honestly don't know. Her entire life has been...changed." Natasha struggled to find a good word to describe what she was trying to say.

"She is ok as far as I can tell. It feels weird at times."
"The bond?"
"Yeah. I'm not entirely sure how she's doing. As I said. It feels weird."

"How are you doing Steve? Knowing what you do now?" The crutch.

"I can't believe it Natasha. I simply can't. I know that it's one thing to see pictures of him. It's another to see him for myself. I desperately want to believe her words. Her work. But I can't."
"Have you looked at your mark?" The pair look at one another. "Soul marks don't lie."

"Soulmarks don't lie."

Some time around dark, long after Natasha left. The only light on is the light in the bathroom. Standing at the sink he keeps his strength at the back of his mind. Making sure that he wouldn't break the sink. Taking a deep breath he lowers his head.
In a flash of energy he looks at his mark.

His heart pounds as his mind catches up with what his eyes see. What his mind is trying to tell him.

His mark was half red.

Chapter Text

OUaT 3

"Y/n?" She stands up and heads back to the office. The world felt too big or was she just feeling small?

"Come in and close the door y/n." The older woman was nice enough. Y/n did as asked and started pacing.

"I don't think they were dreams." After ten minuets y/n starts up the conversation. Still pacing. Trying to get the nervous energy out of her system.

"Fuck that. I know that they aren't. Had it confirmed the other day. Week I mean."
"What happened?"

"I puked. As to be expected. I puked and I was honestly in shock. Knowing that I know their lives." Y/n shivers hard. Moving to rub her arms.

"Cold. So cold." It made no sense to her. She shouldn't be feeling this. It was seventy five in the room. She shouldn't be feeling as cold as she is.

"Y/n, are you ok?" The therapist straightens up. Watching as Y/n starts to rub her arms. The teen is actively shaking.

"Cold." Y/n goes to her knees. Her teeth start chattering. She feels a small sting on her right wrist.

~

The Soldat looks over and sees the line going to his right arm. His body felt heavy. His eyes are blurry and can't fully see. Yet something teases at him. A sensation that he isn't aware of. Fear. Something that he knows that HE isn't feeling. No. He can not feel. His body may be at its peek. But his mind is easily like those of a machine.
He feels something on his right arm. It feels like something was rubbing up against it. Something settles against his face. A mask.

He feels confusion. It is not from the same person. It could not be. For this feels like a different kind of confusion. He holds onto the sensations.

~

Natasha is on the phone with Laura when she got the message that y/n has to be taken to the hospital. Clint is the one seeing her become an active mess. But it's a given since it's her daughter.

"Laura...." Natasha is silenced. Clint sees her sit down hard. Nodding at the words spoken.

"Ok." She hangs up the phone. Before he can ask a knock sounds off on the door. Clint goes over and is surprised to see Steve before his door.

"What are you doing here Steve?"
"Y/n." Clint nods and closes the door.

"Natasha just got off the phone. Give her a moment." Steve nods and waits.

"Shes in the hospital." Natasha's words are light in the air. Shaking had they a physical form. Her mind going several different ways. Does she protect her daughter? Does she help Steve? Despite all her training nothing prepared her for this.

"How is she Steve?"
"Cold, scared and confused. They have a mask on her and a line in."

"She dropped when she got to her session. Kept saying that she was cold. Passed out. They took her to the hospital. Hypothermia."

Clint and Steve are both in shock.

"That means..."
"Yeah. That means that we need to act fast."

"No Natasha, Clint and I have to act fast. You focus on y/n."
"Steve..."
"I mean it Natasha. Y/n needs someone she trusts by her side right now. She needs her mom. She's scared over what is happening to her. Confused."

Of course Steve had to appeal to her humanity. Her want to know that her daughter is safe. She trusts Clint and his family. No two ways around that. Yet at the same time. She wrestled with her instincts.

"Go to her Nat. We got this." Clint puts his hand on her shoulder. Offering her a light smile. At her nod Natasha stands and heads on out.

"Do we have a lead?"
"Not yet but I know where we can get one." Clint looks over to Steve.

"Hold up, you're not saying what I think your saying. Are you?"
"Y/n has been drawing and writing out her nightmares right? She hasn't gotten rid of them has she?"
"As far as I know she hasn't."

"Then we start there. We start with her records."
"Steve, those are extremely personal to her. I don't even know where she hides them." Of course Clint is lying. He is honestly trying to discourage Steve from betraying y/ns trust before he even earns it.

"Clint." The man sighs. Steve caught on to what he was doing.

"Look, shes young Steve. And trust is a huge part of her. She's going to be wrecked when she finds out."
"She is the best lead that we have." Clint shakes his head. Knowing that Steve was going to be stubborn over it.

"Ok. If that is how we have to do things then fine. But I will not lie to her. Got it."

•

Natasha is walking down the hall and sees the nurse come out of y/ns room.

"How is she?"
"Password?"
"Hot dog." The nurse nods. Looking over to y/n.

"It's second hand hypothermia. One of her soulmates. She is stable right now. Bundled. Mostly sleeps. In all my years I have never seen it this bad. This intense. Honestly I feel sorry for the poor girl." Natasha nods. Walking in.

"Hey malen'kiy."
"Mama?" Y/n shifts a little bit and looks at her. Natasha can see that her face has a rose to it.

"I'm here malen'kiy. I was told what happened." Natasha goes over to the spare chair in the room.

"Mama, I think..."
"I know. I have to agree with you. You don't need to say anything." Natasha tries to be calm for her daughter.

"Do you think I can head to bubby for a bit?"
"Ispugannyy?" Y/n nods. Natasha offers her a soft smile.

"He can't hurt you."
"Hes not the one I'm scared of." Natasha now understood her fears now. No one understood why but soulmates couldn't let their other part be harmed by their hands. But that didn't mean that others couldn't order them to bring them to someone who could.

"Ok. Spasibo mama." Natasha moves her hair out of her face that had just fallen over her eye.

"Ne bespokoysya, malyshka."
"Lyublyu tebya, mama."

Natasha smiles as y/n closes her eyes. Letting her hand rest on her daughter's cheek.

"Is she ok Natasha?"
"Cold and tired."
"And scared?"
"Yeah. Wouldn't you?"

•

Steve sighs and settles back. A small smile on his face. They chose to drive over. Clint turns a little to look at Steve.

"You ok?"
"Yeah, shes warming up. Or he is. One of the two. It still bothers me that it's hitting her hard. Barely hitting me."
"Could it be because of the serum? Your super human status?"
"Maybe. I mean, I can't get drunk, heal insanely fast. Even for extreme injuries. Maybe it messed with the soul bond as well."

Clint nods. Keeping his eyes on the road.

"Still shouldn't you have realized that he was still alive?"
"Clint, I saw him drop several hundred feet off a moving train. I watched as his face was filled with shock and horror until I couldn't see him anymore. Until he was out of sight. Something that took minuets. I still dream about that day."

Clint can hear the clear chip in his voice.

"Lean back Steve. It's going to be dark when we get there."

•

"Sir, we have a situation." The head of the base looks up at the man.

"What kind of situation?"
"It's the Soldat sir. His mark is fully colored." The head is surprised by this. Blinking as he looks up.

"I'm sorry, perhaps I didn't hear you right? You said that the soldats mark is fully colored?"
"Yes sir, I did sir." At this the man is up. Walking.

"I want the last report for use of the Soldat. The last mission he went on."
"Sir that was back in 1993. October. The mission with Black Widow."
"Did the mission report say that he met anyone?"
"No sir. The mission report didn't say anything about him doing something like that. Bumping into anyone or the like."
"Has anyone asked him directly? Fuck that. What did the red room report say?"

"The report never came in." The man growls. He goes over to where the nurses are taking in the soldats vitals.

"Sir, the Soldat is up and running. All functions normal." The nurse steps away from the Soldat.

"Soldat respond."
"Ready to reply."
"The last mission, your mark became colored. Do you know who it is?"

"No." Before the soldats eyes an image appeared. A child, no, a baby, slightly newborn. The most unique looking eyes ever. A tiny half star on her left shoulder. Curly wisps of hair. He blinks and the image is gone.

"No. You don't know who your soulmate is?"
"Affirmative."

"It's useless to ask him if he remembers isn't it?" The man mutters. Releasing a deep breath. Tension is in the air. The Soldat feels odd at the fact that they didn't think that he would remember. Better to protect his soulmate. His y/n.

"Why wasn't a full body exam done once he got back? As is standard practice?" The last line is growled out.

"It was a simple message mission! How was any of us suppose to know that this would happen?" The older man slapped the one talking across the face.

"You idiot! Have you not realized that he is Captain Americas soul mate! We get our hands on their missing piece we can use them both to black mail him! Get him to join our side!"

Chapter Text

Once 4

Y/n is asleep in the jet with Natasha flying. Natasha looks over and sees her daughter asleep and with a mask over her eyes. The headphones on her ears cut all sound off. They had done this once before. When y/n was taken to America.

She gets to the farm and sees Melina in the yard with a tablet.

Melina looks up at the sound and sees her daughter in the pilot seat with Y/n in the seat next to her.

"Who is it Melina?"
"Our vnuchka. Alexel." The older man came out. A small smile on his face as the engine cuts out. Natasha smiles as she sees the pair come close to her.

"Natasha! It's been a while." Natasha smiles and goes to give Melina a small hug as Alexel goes to brings Y/n inside.

"Our vnuchka, what happened?"
"A lot Melina. But she is safer here." The women enter the house. Alexel went and took y/n to her room. The bed had been upgraded. Her room otherwise untouched. Except for her wardrobe. That had also been updated as well.

"Now, what is going on Natasha?" Alexel is stern looking at Natasha as Melina comes into the room holding mugs. Handing one to Natasha. Melina sits down and looks at Natasha.

"You remember when I brought y/n over to you Melina?"
"It is hard not to. What you told me. That is something that I can never forget."

"He is out." Melina takes a deep breath. Looking at her wide eyed.

"When you say out, what exactly do you mean?"
"I mean that he is free. They thawed him. She was...harmed by it." Natasha looks over to where her daughter rested.

"She got second hand hypothermia. In the hospital for a few days. When she was better we both agreed to come here."
"Does she still sketch?"

"Yeah. She does."
"I still have supplies for her."
"Has she changed at all?" Alexel always did care for his adopted grand daughter.

Natasha nods. Talking a small sip of her drink.

"She is brilliant. Loves botany. But she hasn't been able to do much on that."
"Natasha, how are you doing with all this?" Melina reaches over and places her hand on Natasha's. Who looks at her mother figure.

"I'm scared over what Hydra will have him do to her. He can't hurt her. But if they hurt him she feels it. She..." Natasha takes a deep breath. "Shes dreamed of them mama. Both of them. What they lived through."

Natasha slid her hand from under Melina's. Taking another sip.

"It's better that she is here. That she can have some peace for a time."
"You know that she and you are welcomed here Natasha. Any time."

Natasha looks at the only parent she has and smiles.

•

Steve and Clint are in y/ns work shop. Clint is going over some of her notes while Steve is looking over the suit.

"Clint?"
"Yeah?"
"Her suit. How form fitting is it?"
"Why do you ask?" Clint looks up. Looking over to Steve.

"It looks too small. Skin tight." Clint comes over. Looking over the suit.

"Do you remember what Loki said? About talking to someone?"
"Yeah. I do. You're not saying..." Clint and Steve both share looks. Before looking at the suit. Clint sees that in some places there is small amounts of dried blood.

"We can take it with us. Have Tony try to reverse engineer it." Clint clasped Steve's shoulder hard. "Come on Steve. Let see what we can find and be done. I don't feel right being here without her."

"Yeah. Let's get it going. You go through her pictures. I'll go through her notes."

The pair work quickly and silently. Clint looks over a few times. Seeing Steve's expression change a little bit at times. When he hears Steve softly sigh he looks over and goes over.

"That you from back then?" It's a soft picture. One of where the pair were asleep. Steve's head tucked under Buckys.

"Yeah." Steve has a smile and a small chuckle on his voice. "Funny, but I remember that day. I had gotten sick, looking for a lost cat. Found them and had just gotten home right before Buck did. Bundled myself up and he came in and we cuddled."

"That's good to hear that you and he had some soft moments like that. I know that her dreaming of your lives hasn't been overly good. Maybe now she won't be so unhealthy."

"What do you mean by that?" Steve is concerned. Looking over to Clint. Clint grabs all the notebooks to take them with him.

"Her nightmares make her sick Steve. She hardly eats as it is. Hardly has a restful night. She can't go to school because she wakes up with bruises that seem impossible. It's, bless fully not often. But it does happen. I've seen her face get impossibly marked up. When I saw it for myself I thought that she and Laruen had been attacked. Went straight to Nick and Natasha on that." Clint finds her coded notebooks. It's weird but he chooses to take them with him. Maybe Tony could use them. Who knows.

"Clint, Steve?" The pair turn to look at Laura. Caught. Shit.

"I'm not going to ask. She's not here."
"What do you mean that she isn't here!" Alarm and worry fill Steve.

"Natasha took her home." Clint nods but Steve is very much confused.

"Thanks hun. We are taking y/ns suit with us as well. See if Tony can reverse what she did to it."
"Ok, she hates that thing anyway. Wished that she never made it." Laura goes over to Clint and presses a kiss to him.

"Got ya. She never did like this kind of thing. Did she take her ax's with her?"
"No. They are still in their spots."

"Ok. She will be back then."
"How come?" The Barton's jerk and chuckle a bit. Forgetting that Steve was with them.

"Y/n likes plants."

•

Y/n wakes up and smiles. Feeling safe. Knowing that she is home. Laura and the kids may be welcoming and all. But nothing beat bubbys place. She doesn't remember having bad dreams here.

"Sweet heart." Melina stands when she sees Y/n make her way down the steps. Y/n feels the stress melt from her as she gives her babushka a hug. Feeling joy at it. True happiness.

"So this is the malen'kiy who has taken over my wife's heart." Y/n stiffens at the gruff male voice Thats coming near them.

"Bubby?" She looks up and Melina smiles as she looks down at y/n.

"This is Alexel. He helped raise your mother when she was younger." Y/n makes the decision to switch to Russian for good at the moment.

"So hes my grandfather then?"
"Yes little one. He is."
"Don't let my tattoos scare you little one. I may be big and scary, but I protect my family. Including you."

Y/n nods. Moving away from Melina. The elder widow looks her grand daughter over.

"You little one, do not look good in the slightest. Let us get some hot broth in you and you can tell us what you have been up to. Natasha is in the bathroom at the moment."
"Thanks Gram."

The there head to the table and y/n sits down.

"How did you get your tattoos?"
"I was in jail for a time." Y/n nods and leaves it be. Natasha comes into the room.

"How do you feel kiddo?"
"Better, needed the sleep. No dreams or nightmares."

"That's good." Natasha sits down and Melina comes over with a mug for y/n. Who happily sips at it.

"Gram, do you think I can start a small garden? I've gotten into botany a few years ago and would like to keep going with that."
"Absolutely. I can even enroll you in online classes if you wish."

"Really?" Y/n instantly lit up at that. The three adults could taste how excited she grew. Melina and Natasha have smiles on their faces, Alexel let a small chuckle out.

"So excited for something so simple."
"Grandpa, most medicines come from plants or bacteria. Herbology. Has been around for so long already. Did you know that some medicines for diabetics comes from this one flower Thats native to France? That the whole reason why back in the Middle Ages raw tomatoes would react to pewter and kill people? That stone fruit seeds has toxins in them?"

Alexel is surprised at the lesson he is getting from his grand daughter. Again this isn't something that he was interested in. But he loves the look in her face. How bright she seemed to get. It was almost infectious.

"What do you hope to do in the future?" Alexal's words open up a can of worms that no one was expecting.

•

The Soldat pauses for a quick second. Feeling his chest light up in excitement. In his mind he is smiling. He knows for a fact that it was y/n. Her emotions, what he's felt of them so far,has a softness to them. Not a knifes edge. He continues on. His mind wondering what the topics of conversation was.

"Soldat!"

His mind snaps to the man before him.

"Ready to receive orders."

Good. The man takes a deep breath. Pulling a paper out from a folder and placing it before the man on his desk.

"Identify this woman."
"Name Natasha Romonoff. Alias Black Widow."

"Good. Since she was with you last mission you are to find her and interrogate her. Should she not comply bring her back to be further interrogated. Am I clear?"

"Mission parameters accepted." The Soldat knows that his heart is pounding. He couldn't. Finding the woman leads him to her. To his soulmate.

"Good. Last time anyone had seen her she was traveling in Iowa. See what you can find." The man leans back and lets a hard breath out.

"Of everything that has happened since Red Skulls day this is what's going to break me." The Soldat hears the man and can't help but agree. Things are going to get hectic. But now how they think.

He wouldn't bring her back to be interrogated. No he would hurt from disobeying the order but it would be worth keeping y/n safe. As long as his heart is safe he would take any punishment they dish out.

Chapter Text

Once 5

Natasha helps bring the last box in. Looking over to her daughter. A warm smile is on her face. She looks so much happier here. The week here helped her greatly. But now that she is getting a lab together and samples gathered.

"I think I need to head out sweeties. You're safe and loved."

"Plus I'm going to be busy. You know how I get." Natasha gives a small laugh. Going to hug her as her phone goes off. Natasha sighs.

"The real world waits for no one huh mama?" Y/n slowly pulls away. Looking at her mom.

"No sweetie. The world waits for no one." They pull away and Natasha gives her a smile. "You carry on y/n. I may not be your birth mother but I am proud of what you accomplished so far and I am so proud of what you will accomplish."

Y/n gave her a brilliant smile as Natasha leaves. Checking her phone. It's from Phill. She moves a bit quickly. Checking what the message was.

-Pancake.

Oh shit.

•••

Steve and Clint sees Natasha land. Jumping from the cockpit the second she was able to.

"Sorry for dragging you away from her Natasha."
"It's fine Clint. She has been doing much better there than here in the states." There is a small twinge in her voice as she speaks. Slowly she takes a deep breath.

"Hydra on the hunt?"
"Yeah. They discovered that his soulmark has been fully colored. Hydra is looking for you."

"Because I was the last..." Natasha freezes and looks at Clint.

"The kids. The last place I was confirmed to be was in Iowa. If he looks through the phone book he will find Laura and the kids."

"But not you Natasha. If he is the ghost of Hydra then once he realizes that you aren't there he should just leave with no one the wiser. Right?"

Clint is trying to defuse the situation. While he may be failing at that currently he knew that Natasha was worried for y/n.

"Y/ns lab Clint. In case you forgot she has notes and drawings there. Drawings about him!"

"That's not entirely true Natasha." Steve steps in for the first time. Natasha swings around and glares at him.

"What exactly do you mean by that Steve?"
"Clint and I returned to her lab while you and her were gone."
"Before you start wishing his cock was full of splinters and his ass was the only way he can cum..." Clint steps in and steps between the pair. Putting his own manhood on the line.

"Laura caught us. We took her notes and her suit with us. Hoping that Tony could reverse what she has done. We didn't take as many of her drawings with us."

Clint and Natasha share wide looks. Steve reads the pure parental fear in Natasha's eyes.

"We should have taken them with us."
"If he finds her drawings Steve he will know that we know who she truly is. Who she is to him."

"Maybe we can use this to our advantage."

Natasha and Clint both turn to look at Steve as he makes his way over to the car.

"Hop in. I have a plan."

•

The Soldat was able to track down the area where Natasha was last seen. Using some Hydra tech he was able to hack into servers and find video evidence of her in the state. Them stopping only once for gas in the time that they enteres the state. Reading the lips of everyone he sees that from their location they had a fifteen minuet drive. He manages to fallow the trail until it ends at a part of the forest with an old dirt trail on it.

Parking his bike and covering it in foliage he makes his way down. The night air is cool. The sky clear with a bit of a nip to it. Being further north and west the seasons were a bit different. Much, much colder at night.

Once he hits the end of the road he sees that it's really a long driveway. With a pair of buildings at the end.

The car out front told him that it was a bad idea to go into the house first. So he canvases the second building. He lingers long enough for the dawn to come and noise comes from the house.

Taking a few days to make sure that no one lived in the second building the Soldat was able to determined that no one resides in the second building. In fact the family didn't even spare it a glance.

Entering the building he turns on the night vision setting. Entering he pauses. Off to the side is a glowing room. The glow was faint but a lot. Curious he heads his way over.

He has to take his goggles off. The glow is everywhere. On the top third of the walls and the celling. Giving a faint glow. Moving into the room he reaches out and feels the wall. Wondering what was causing the glow.

Removing his hand he removes the glove from his right and feels it again. It is soft whatever it is. Slightly furry feeling. Out of nowhere he places his cheek on the wall. Only when he did so did he take a deep breath. Eyes blinking rapidly when he realizes what it was. But it wasn't possible. Was it? Taking another sniff confirms it.

Moss.

Different. Thats for sure. Had this been any other mission he would have mentioned it to his handlers. But since this wasn't a recruitment mission he had no reason to mention it.

Taking a selfish moment he lets his body relax for a hot moment. Damn near falling asleep standing up. But a deep breath tells him that he needs to get moving.
Looking around the room tells him that it was a sort of bed room. A cot in the one corner, a small set of drawers off to the side. The set of drawers had a paper on it. Moving carefully he goes over to look at the paper. It's a drawing. One of his own face. He thinks. With two others as well. One is older and the other is a baby. Heart softening until it clenches as he reads the back.

'Is this what real family is? Caring for one another? Having soft moments with people who care for you?'

Blin. She felt alone. The Soldat knew which she was referring to. Stiffening when he realizes exactly what was happening. He had found where y/n felt safe at.

Again his heart hammers in his chest as he puts the paper back down.

Natasha was his target. Not y/n. No. As far as Hydra was concerned this was a dead end.

Exiting the room he heads on to the rest of the room. Throwing his goggles back on. Turning on the night vision. He is thankful that he didn't have a body cam on him. Or else the entire thing would be blown. The one desk has drawers in it. Slowly he sorta through the papers.

His heart drops at the one. The angle is off. The perception is strange. Yet for him it confirmed everything. He found where y/n had been staying. At lest in part. He could go to the house and explore that. But again, the target was Natasha. Not y/n.

He leaves and heads for his bike. Going over to where his handlers were.

Chapter Text

Once 6

Natasha runs. Trying to get away from the soldier. But he is too fast. He tackles her making her tumble around on the roof. Being a little bit dazed it take her a second to get her bearings. Taking just long enough for the soldier to stand up and reach her.
He knows that the widow knows where y/n is. His one memory tells him so. His left hand grips her neck a bit softer than he normally would. True she is fighting for her life as he walks closer to the edge of the roof. He can see pure fear in her eyes as he stops and reaches his arm out. Her feet on the inner lip of the roof.

"Where is she?" His voice is flat. No emotion at all. Watching as her hands try to grip his. To get the hand off from around her neck.

"Safe from you." This fire ignited in his soul. Moving through his blood like poison. While not truly sure why he is feeling this. He understands the confusion and fear that is felt second hand. The fear more defined.

"I will never harm her." He spoke true. He would never harm her. The widow knows this. So why was she not giving him information?

"You might. They will." The fire smolders out. The soldier understands. Easing up on his grip on her neck. He moves backwards. Pulling her further onto the roof. The fear in her eyes go away. Yet her eyes remain locked on his.
Natasha sees for herself the change in the soldiers eyes. The rage, understanding and worry. But deep below she can see how he worries for her daughter. She can see how he understands her thought process.

They give one another nods of understanding. She slips a small paper into his sleeve. He isn't as harsh as he normally is throwing her to the ground. He knows how long he needed to knock her out. A minuet or two. Shes a fantastic actress. Acting like she's dead in seconds.

Steve and Clint get there in just enough time to see him run off. Steve goes to check her over. Seeing Natasha poke an eye open.

"He gone?"
"Yeah. Your neck looks rough."
"Not surprising." Clint helps her up.

"She is safe right?"
"Yeah. Safe and protected."

•

Melina watches as her granddaughter smiles. Looking at the pig skin in the Petri dish. The seed had taken root. You could see it under the skin.

"Success?"
"Yeah bubby. It took root. Now we just need to see how far it can go."
"Ever think about a live test?"

Y/n gives Melina a look. Melina chuckles lightly. About to turn away when Y/n gives a harsh gasp. Eyes going wide. She has trouble breathing. She's shaking and moves to wrap her arms around herself.

"What's wrong?"
"He's so mad. It hurts." Melina moves over to Y/n and pulls her away from the sample. Giving the younger woman a hug.

"Talk to me Vnuchka. What does it feel like?"
"Fire. Burning."

"It isn't directed at you Vnuchka. You know that it isn't."
"I know. But I hardly ever feel him. Really feel him." Y/ns voice is so small. Melina holds onto her.

"Keep talking vnuchka. It's going to be ok."
"I don't like this."

It takes a few minuets for it to go away. Y/n sighs. Pulling away from her bubby.

"I'm ok now. Thanks Bubby."
"No problem y/n. The pair turn back to the dish.

"Do we have any raw bone?" Melina smiles at that.

"I think we do."

•

Natasha is now worried. Shes pacing in the flat. She hated that she was right. That the soldier was looking for her. She hoped that he would realize that she would never let Hydra ger their hands on her daughter.

"Nat, you're going to be driving yourself nuts. Stop stressing over it."
"I can't Steve. If it was your child being hunted by Hydras elite you would worry too."

"Did you forget that y/n is my soul mate? Besides she working on botany with her bubby right now." Natasha and Clint look at him.

"How do you know that?"
"I've been having dreams about her recently." Steve says that as naturally as he can.

"What has these dreams been telling you?"
"She safe and comfortable. Talking to her bubby and her grandfather has challenged her to knock him down. Arm wrestling at times." Natasha nods.

"That sounds like him."

Just then Steve's phone goes off. Looking at it shows that it's Tony.

"Hey Tony."
"Hi ya Capcicle. I need to ask. Is Clint with ya?" Steve looks over to Clint confused.

"Yeah he is. Why do you ask?"
"Though so. You three need to get over here asap. You need to see what I discovered with y/ns suit."
"Ok. I'll pass the message along. See ya in a bit Tony."

Clint and Natasha are both over to him.

"That was Tony. We need to head back."
"He say why?"
"Something about y/ns suit. He didn't elaborate on it."

•

Tony is honestly shocked at what he has seen once he dismantled the suit. The filter for the suit also works with filtering out water as well.

"What did you need us for Tony?"
"Natasha; that girl of yours is leagues above me." Tony points to a screen. It's a blue print and a holographic schematic of the breather from the suit.

"Not only does it have a super fine mesh filter. But it also has a secondary function for breathing underwater. Pulling pure oxygen out of water." Everyone is stunned.

"You're joking."
"I wish I was. But I'm not. This is so advanced it nearly alien." Tony brings over the physical component. Handing it to Steve. Who has no idea what it does.

"That component right there is sealed. I can't get a look inside of it."
"Have you checked her notes?"

Tony gives a barking laugh at Steve's words.

"Check the... Steve. Cap. If I could understand it I would. But I can't make hide nor hair of it." Tony brings up a screen of the page. She got rid of the suits blueprints. But not the blueprints of the components.

Steve recognize the code instantly.

"It's an old code but I know it." Steve looks at it again. It's a substitution cypher done in numbers. Smart.

"You got a pen and paper?" Tony slides it over.
"We use to use these in our company. The Howling Commandos. Gave ourselves that name. We used a substitution cypher. But we took things one step further and switched out letters for numbers. Like for instance A would equal F. The number associated with it would be seventeen. If she is using the old code in its entirety...." Steve trails off. Writing things down. Tony is shocked. Looking over to Natasha.

"Did you know?"
"No. I had to put distance between us when she was growing up. Her safety and all that."

"Steve, how many people know this code?"
"You mean those still alive? Honestly I'm probably the only one who still remembers it." Steve translates it all.

"Or she used a different key word. According to this she used moss." Steve looks at his translation and he did do everything right.

"Let me see that." Tony takes the offered page just as Nick comes in.

"Any luck Stark?"
"You need to get her involved. If she can do this on a small scale then she can do so much on a large one."

"Thought you couldn't read her notes." Nick looks at Tony before the other man points to Steve.

"The code master overs there figured things out. Now that I have a key I can get Jarvis to decider it all."
"You scanned her notes in?"
"Yeah. First thing I did. But I couldn't solve the key. Now that Steve has I can look through..." Jarvis brings up a file that he had no idea was in the system. Everyone pales at that.

"Is that...." Nick's words are stopped mid way. He reaches up and pulls his eye patch down and off. While he couldn't see out of his other eye he could pretend at lest.

"This looks like a first person account of... But that's impossible."

Her notes lead them to her privet drawing server. Where the worst of the worst was kept of her drawings. They may all be in pencil minus any color. But it still made stomachs drop.

"No. It can't be." Steve shook his head.

"It is Steve." Most eyes land on Natasha. Who takes a deep breath.

"You knew. The entire time you knew!" Steve turns. Looking at Natasha. "Outside of the picture. You knew that Bucky was the Winter Soldier. You knew what they turned him into!"
"Steve, I understand that your mad, but your hurting y/n with how pissed you are."

"No Natasha! You and her both kept this! Yes I did see the picture. But I couldn't believe that it was real. She was dreaming of us both incase you forgot. How was..."

"Steve, you can't fully blame them. Look to your soulmark. What is y/n feeling. That alone should tell you the truth. She didn't hide anything from you. You simply didn't ask." Steve is seconds away from knocking Clint off his rocker. Pushing past the group.

How could he continue on. She had dreamed of them both. Yet for some reason she was more in tune with Bucky. Given that they knew one another longer, if he could call it that. He didn't want to believe that Bucky had changed. Not his best jerk. Not him.

Clint finds him in the gym taking his rage and frustrations out on the bag.

"It wasn't kept from you will ill intent Steve."
"She wasn't dreaming about him Clint. The Bucky I know would never do the things that the man with the metal arm has."

"Steve, things came out while you were in the ice. We found out more about what the Nazi's have done. What Hydra could have done." One more hard hit and Steve felt a sting on his knuckles. Having punched it full force. Seconds later he feels something cold on them. It feels like ice.

~

Y/n whimpers when she wakes up. Her hand screaming. Without a second thought she goes and runs ice cold water over it. She feels rage again. But she knows that it's not him. It's Steve. She has no idea why he is so mad. But even feeling it second hand makes her scared. Worried over what he may do. Her phone is in her pocket. The line is secure. Only one number in it. Her moms.

'Mama, are you with Steve?'

She sends the message. Still scared. Still with her hand under the ice cold water. Her phone vibrates and she checks it.

'I am. Hes... not too happy with something he found out.'
'You mean my privet notebooks that I had in the lab that held the worst of my nightmares?'

Natasha feels her blood drop when she reads that message. She swallows harshly.

'You have more then one?'
'Yes. The one was straight up code to access the worst ones on my privet server. The ones that show what they did to him.'

Tony and Nick are both shocked when they hear Natasha gag. She is doubled over with a hand over her mouth. Pulling it away just long enough to mutter something and Jarvis kills the screen.

"You ok Natasha?" Tony goes over to her. Making sure that she can sit down and get the shock out. Instead of speaking Natasha holds her phone out to him. Passing it over Tony pales up.

When Steve calms down and tends to his hand he returns to the lab. There Nat, Tony and Nick are silent. Making Clint and Steve share looks.

"The.." Tony takes a deep breath. Swallowing harshly.

"The notebook you two grabbed was had written computer code to access a privet server with the worst of what she had dreamed of in it. The only copies." Natasha harshly swallows a few times.

Clint and Steve both feel sick to their stomachs.

"Then where's the schematics?" That was the one thing that they were looking for. Natasha's phone goes off.

"Safe." Tony groans. Shaking his head.

"Ok. I'm going to take a few days before I dismantle the suit. I need to look at puppies or kitties for a bit."
"You looked through a few of them?"
"Only one other. They had him strapped to a chair and had him look at himself." Tony gives himself a little shake.

It will take some time for them to be ok with everything that happened. But things will get better.

•••

The man rages as he strikes the Soldat across the back. He makes no noise. He knows that he failed the mission. Killing the widow and failing to bring her back to be interrogated. He would take the beatings. He would take the pain knowing that he protected his soulmate. His blank gaze hid the fact that he was internally screaming. Cursing the man out. The Soldat is surprised to feel his more...shall we say, protective side, pokes up. Knowing full well that they both would protect their y/n with their lives.

Chapter Text

Once 7
(Age 18)

Y/n has a wide smile at the field mouse she exposes to the seeds. It took a few days but the mouse does die. The roots sprouting up from the bones.

"Doing good?"
"Yup. It works with living animals. It seems to be quick. No pain. But I don't think that this will be a good thing." Y/n sighs and looks over to Melina.

"Will it grow into something?"
"Moss mostly. I've been thinking about modifying it to just grow grass." Y/n sees the letter in her grandmothers hand. Melina smiles and hands the letter over to her. Y/n takes it and goes wide eyed. Her hand shakes as she opens the letter. Sitting down hard and opening the letter. Reading it makes her extremely excited.

"You earned it granddaughter. Your brilliant. A pioneer in the field. If anyone can return the exclusion zone to normal it's you." Melina smiles at her granddaughters face.

"I really want to tell mom. Think she's busy?" Y/n looks up at her bubby.

"You won't know if you don't try." Y/n nods. Looking over to the glass cage. The mouse is on the dirt ground. Mimicking its natural habitat. Y/n has several cameras pointed at the cage. Even going as far as to modify a few cameras with the help from a friend in the states. Noobmaster37. On Reddit. The pair of them had been talking back and forth for a bit.

Y/n couldn't wait to share the news. Noobmaster was helping her through the modifications. She hoped that they would be happy with the news. She hoped that they would be willing to keep helping her.

Melina lets her be. She knows that it's a shock. That y/n will do everything that she can. Being the youngest botanist in the country. Several countries were vying for her research. But y/n wanted to refine things before she sent samples off. Mostly putting in a kill switch.

Y/n gets her phone and messages her mother. Mostly sending a picture to her of the letter.

~

Natasha is with Clint and Steve. Trying to figure out what is the next thing that they should do. Hydra thought that she, Natasha, was dead. Meaning that they didn't truly have a way to find y/n. That wasn't what bothered Natasha however. The fact that the Soldat feigned her death made her worry. Why did he...

Natasha jerks as her phone goes off. Making the others jerk as well.

"It's just my phone." Everyone sighs. Natasha brings out her phone. Checking if she smiles.

"Do you guys mind if I make a call?"
"Do what you need to Natasha."
"If you don't mind me asking, who?"

"My daughter."
"Put it on speaker." Steve instantly perks up at y/ns name. It has been a few years since he had seen or talk to her. Let alone hear her voice.

"Hi sweetie."
"Mom!" Y/ns voice is like a balm to his soul. Natasha and Clint both see Steve physically relax at her voice.

"I have you on speaker sweetie. Clint and Steve are here with me."

"Did you tell them?" Y/n couldn't help but blush at the fact that Steve was with her mom.

"No sweetie. I didn't say a word. When did you get the letter?"
"Today. Uncle Clint, Steve, I'm part of an expedition into the Exclusion Zone in Chernobyl. They think that my plants may be able to quicken the recovery time."

"Your plants?" Steve and Clint share looks.
"Yes. I managed to find a way to break bones down naturally. Bodies as well. Only dead ones. Plants have been a huge interest of mine. Always have been."

Steve's heart hurts at the tone her voice took. How soft it sounded.

"I thought that you were a mechanic."
"No. Doing that would make the headaches go away. Plants were always an interest of mine. When I left bubby the first time I had a small garden set up. Wanting to know how plants grew." Steve and Clint had to keep silent for a moment. Sharing looks.

"When do you meet up with the others?" Clint is soft.

"On Monday. We meet up to go over expectations and needed gear. Living situations and duties. I'm honestly excited for this. But scared as well."

"That is easy to understand." Steve is the one taking over the call a bit. "It has been ages since anyone was over there. So who knows what would happen to the area."

"Yeah. I have seen more than my fair share of horror movies about the subject." Steve could feel her shiver at that. But he chuckles.

"Let us know the details when you do." Natasha's voice takes a motherly tone. Switching to Russian.

"I will mama. Love you and miss you."
"Love you too y/n."

Clint and Steve sees Natasha in a different light after that. The way her tone was. Steve can truly hear the widow care for his soulmate.

•

Y/n has her hair covered and walks quickly over to the building. She has her notebook with her. It has a list of supplies that she would need to bring with her or have supplied.

"And you are?" The one person blocks her from entering the building. Instead of answering she hands over the letter and her ID. The man looks at it then her with a raised brow. Nodding he hands them back and lets her in. She moves close to the front and off to the side. Not wanting to draw attention to her. Others file in and she keeps off to the side. Memorizing each of their faces.
The meeting starts up. Y/n instantly feels a bit of dread when they say that the team will be close to the reactor. That temporary shelters have been set up for them. That labs have been built. That all they need was for the group to go in.

Several people ask good questions. But none of them asked the key question.

"And you are?"
"Y/n Romanov. What about security?" All eyes land on her. Everyone looks at her and blinks.

"Security?"
"For what?"

"Feral dogs and the like. We don't know whats deep in the exclusion zone. It has been wild since the initial reaction." Her words are floating in the aether. All of them look at one another.

"Romanov has a point. We don't know what is really out there. Even with the drones." the American spoke up. Other nod in agreement.

"We have a band of mercenaries at our hire. They will work in shifts. One day one night. They will have their own camp grounds. The group have been instructed to keep an eye on things and not to mess with any of the tests."

Y/n is still nervous but nods. Understanding. The group keeps talking. She thinks about what she would need to do.

~

Steve feels her nerves as they talk over what needs to be done. They needed to bring Hydra down. To get rid of the group. Once and for all. Y/n grew up knowing second hand what they were capeable of. But never saw for herself what they could do. If he could keep her from that then he will.

"Steve, you ok?" He blinks a few times. Looking at Clint and Nat.

"I'm ok. It's y/n. Shes nervous."
"It makes sense. She is the youngest of her field. Shes probably worried about her safety. The safety of others." Natasha isn't looking at him as she looks over the pages on the table.

"Natasha, will you answer a question I have?" Only then does she look up at Steve.

"What is it?"
"Why did you bring her to America?"

Natasha is surprised over the question. Looking over and blinking a few times.

"She needed to be around others. With her bubby she wasn't getting the social interaction that she needed. To know what it was like to be around others. To be around people who...don't study what she does." Steve and Clint share looks.

"What do you mean by that?"
"It's nothing Steve. Just me protecting her."

"You mean you were just being a mom." Natasha nods.

"I can't have kids. Part of 'graduation' and all." Natasha's voice takes an honest tone. One that while Clint had heard before, Steve has not.

"When he handed her to me, something changed. The look in her eyes. That tiny quiver in her lip as he handed her to me. The look in his eyes as he gave her a hard look before we left. My daughter had changed the entire course of history. Her grand parents both care for her. She knows what to do if she is ever in danger."

"You taught her how to fight?" Steve couldn't quite believe what he hears.

"I taught her how to defend herself. To protect herself. The world has been getting worse and worse. I know that you don't want to see it Steve. But the world isn't what you left."

Steve gives her a flat look. He hates that shes right.

~•~

The man in charge looks over the file. Frowning. Hydra had been doing secrets testing in the exclusion zone for years deep underground.

Chapter Text

Once 8

Y/n loads her notebooks up down at the bottom. She would be the only one to read them. They held formulas, new ideas that she hasn't been able to test. She makes sure that the root samples she was bringing with her were fully locked into their test tubes.

"Are you ready for this?" Y/n looks up and sees Alexel in the doorway. Leaning against the entryway.

"Not sure. People are going to look down on me because of how young I am." She sighs.

"Let your work speak for yourself little one. Let them learn how smart you are." His grin a little rough. Yet full of warmth for her.

"I will. I hope that I can expand things."

Melina is next to y/n as she goes over to the convoy. Her bag is taken from her and security looks through it. Seeing nothing but clothing and notebooks. Not to mention personal care supplies. She has a sealed box with her and it contains the root samples. The soldier nods and she looks over to her bubby. With one last nod shared between them y/n enters the van. She is in the middle of the back seat. Keeping her eyes closed. She hates traveling. She really does.

Soon enough they get to the base. Y/n sees the base. Barricades, several storage containers. Several men in gear with guns. Pairs of two patrolling it looks like.

"Miss Romanov," she looks over to the leader of this little adventure.

"If you would fallow me please. We have some things to talk about." She tilts her head and fallows. Where she is lead over to her own trailer.

"This case came from America. None of us can get it open." She goes wide eyed and over to it. Sure enough she recognizes the case. Tony.

"I had some friend in America help me out." She opens and sees her ax's. Lifting them both out she sees the laptop under them.

"The ax's?"
"Personal protection. The laptop is a surprise however." Y/n frowns. Looking at it. She preferred her voice recorder to all this. She leaves it in the case. But puts her harness for her ax's on. The weight of them familiar. Taking the gloves out and putting them on. She heads out of her lab and to the rest of the group.

Marc sweeps the area. Not liking being here. He sees one of the researchers come over with their daughter. She has ax's strapped to her back.

"Yo Spector." Marc looks over to his commanding officer.

"You're going to be y/n's personal guard."
"How come she gets special treatment?" Marc frowns.

"Shes a botanist. So shes going to be out in the wild more than the others. Heard that she's a bit wild."
"Can ya point ger out to me?" They walk over to where she is at.

"Miss Romanov?" Y/n turns. Looking them over.

"How old are you?" Marc's commanding officer smacks him in the back of the head. Glaring at the man.

"Legal and loyal. Why does that matter?" She points to her shoulder where the strap is.

"I don't need a body guard."
"Can you use them?"

"Is captain America Hitlers perfect image?" Her words makes everyone pause and look at her. She ignores them. Freaking out over what she just said. But it was true.

"You're not wrong. Names Marc."
"Romanov. Botany. I keep weird hours."

When everything was said and done y/n went over and set up her tanks and things. She would be working with Helen Cho a little on this. She takes a deep breath before gathering up some tools. A small bucket and shovel. Marc is watching her.

"I need to get some soil for my work. This is where you come in. It's going to be a bit of a walk. I need medium level radiation soil."

"Why not low level soil?"

Marc asks as she looks at the map of the area.

"Here would work. It's close and just the right level as well. Not too bad that it would set our counters and calm enough that I can just jump into my work."
Y/n settles the bucket and heads out with Marc on her tail.

"You're really fearless aren't you?"
"Nope. I'm plenty scared. But there's safety in numbers. It's close to the camp. As long as I can see it I know that I'm safe. I can run back to camp if need be."

They make their way over and y/n picks a good spot. Taking the shovel she makes a nice little hole before grabbing the trowel and gathering some dirt. Putting them in the bucket. She pauses. Eyes darting over the ground. Before looking up.
Y/n doesn't hear any birds or insects. Picking up they quickly head back to camp. Y/n puts the soil in the tanks and head over to the leader of the group.

"Something is seriously wrong here. Theirs no sound. Outside of us there's no bugs no birds. Even the wind seems to avoid the area."

Y/n is freaking out over it. She knows that the others have noticed the same thing. But shes the first to really say something."

"You're a botanist. What do you know about animals?"
"This isn't knowing about animals. It's knowing to survive in the wild. Silence like this is not good in any regards. It means danger. I may be the only one saying this but security is on edge. I can see it in their body langue."

At this Marc gives a small cough.

"Permission to speak freely sir?"
"Permission granted."

"Y/n is right. I didn't know how bad it was until it was she and I out in the wild. Camp was still in sight. But something is definitely wrong with the area."

Jakob looks at them both. He had worked with Marc several times in the past so he trusted the man's words. Yet for a teen to know this was new to say the least.

"Alright. The teams know not to go out at night anyway. This will only keep them close."

Y/n sighs. Happy that her concerns were heard. With a nod she and Marc leave the tent.

"Thanks for having my back Marc. I appreciate it."

Her Russian accent drops for a moment. Surprising Marc but not saying a word.

"I didn't say anything that wasn't true y/n. When I said that you are safe with me I mean it."
"Still. Thanks."

Marc keeps an eye on her as she goes over to her lab. Starting to do whatever it is that she was doing.

Y/n gets lost in recording her notes that she misses the time change. Marc gets her attention.

"Miss Romanov, I'm going off duty. Do you need anything before I go?"
"No. Thank you for asking Mr, Spector. I'm going to be staying here for a bit. Watching how they react to things. Plus I can use the dirt from earlier for my work for now. I do have a larger tank for later."

Y/n flips the grow lights and their timers on.

"I'm due to get some sleep myself. Thanks for the reminder."
The pair heads off to their respective barracks. Y/n is lucky that hers was on the bottom. Adjusting the bed she lays down on her stomach. Settling in with five other women.

"That you Y/n."
"Yeah Doc. It's me."

The pair were across from one another. Whispering.

"You seem...unsettled."
"That's one way to put it doc. Something feels off about all of this. The area anyway."

Y/n settles under the unzipped sleeping bag.

"Is that you or your soulmate?"
"Both. I understand why. But at the same time."

Y/n trails off. Hugging the pillow to her tightly. Half laying on it. Half with her chin on it. Helen watches her and turns around in the bed herself. Getting a better look at y/n.

"Even with all the advances in science we don't fully know the reason why we feel our soulmates."

"I got a theory if you're willing to listen."

Y/n looks up. Continuing at Helen's nod.

"I think it's leftover from the more primal days. That way interbreeding wasn't that bad."

Helen looks at her stunned. Blinking a few times. Y/n turns her head down and yawns loudly.

"Go to bed y/n. We can talk more in the morning and talk collabs from there."

"Fair. I'm going to need more soil anyway. Want me to get you some to mimic a 'natural' environment?"

"That's not needed y/n. At least not now."

The pair fall silent.

"This is real. Right? We are here. In Chernobyl. Studying the world."
"Yeah. We are. Out of the pair of us you are the one that I'm confident will make waves."

Y/n smiles and pulls the blanket over her and settles into sleep. Not aware of the potential danger around her.

•~•

The soldier can see the camp. They are far enough away from the base that it's no worry. About five miles. But he mostly keeps close to protect y/n. He can feel how unsettled the group is. Even Y/n didn't go out of the camp site unless there was a large group. And she had battle ax's on her. Something that he was surprised to see.

He kept high and placed cameras around to make sure that everyone was safe still. Even going as far as to check out the old base close to the reactor.

Hudra had the great idea to have a hidden base close to the reactor. None of them expecting the disaster to come. None of them even thought about the possibility of it happening. Even Hydra was smart enough to, as the saying goes, nuke the site. It truly was a tragedy what happened. The people and pets. What many people didn't know that the evacuation happenes instantly. No time to get anything.

He takes a look at the map. The detailed one Hydra had supplied him. He had marked several locations. Most further in. But his counter keeps him safe. He could virtually feel the radiation. It makes his skin crawl in the worst way posable.

Chapter Text

Once 9

Six months and things are getting better. The weather warmed up and y/n and Helen where seen together more often then not. Working together. True they had to keep importing the food that they needed.
Y/n takes a deep breath and leans back. Things were doing good. She even found some mushrooms that were absorbing the radiation in the dirt. It greatly accelerated her research. Her ability to splice that gene into other plants was giving her a little bit of an issue. How do you splice a fungal gene into a tree?

Sighing she grabs her music player and goes for a walk.

The soldier seeing her walk out of the main base fallows silently. Music player in her pocket. Ear buds in. The wire going under her shirt and thermals. He watches her as she finds a nice sized stick on the ground. Moving it around a few times.
He goes wide eyed as she moves it like an expert. His breath is caught. Watching her move. No. Dance.

Y/n is light on her feet. Like a dancer. Or a gymnast. Fast but very controlled movements. As if her soul lead her and her body was a second unit.
He is so enthralled watching her that he nearly lets himself get seen. Moving too far forward on the roof of some of the buildings that he nearly fell off.

After a while Y/n drops the stick and grabs her ax's. Shes hot, sweaty. And still feeling rage. She pauses and focuses. It's Steve but she couldn't reflect the feelings back to him. Meaning that she would have to work herself to exhaustion. Again.

"God fucking damn it! What the fuck has you so fucking pissed off!"

Y/n screams out. Storming off into the danger zone. Of course the Soldat keeps her in his vision. But he isn't the only one. Spector fallows her out and over.

"Soulmate?"
"Yerp."
"Anger issues?"
"Yerp."

"Want to fight something?"
"No shit Sherlock. Fuck! I wish I knew why that pasty asshole was this pissed off! I can hardly focus right now!"

Y/n angrily half mutters as she storms out. Spector keeps up with her. Jogging to keep up with her. The pair move. Y/n finds a downed tree. About three foot radius. Stuck upright acting like the cross point for a massive lean too. Adjusting her grip on her ax's Y/n growls a little and goes after the tree.
Marc kinda chills and watches her wear herself out. His body cam picking up everything. Letting her wear herself out. Marc had to admit. She knew what she was doing. It was clear that she had some sort of training. Or adjusted training to use with her ax's.

Y/n stops and breathes heavily. Finally wearing herself out. She puts her ax's on her back and move over to Marc.

"You good to head back?"

Marc looks up and nods. Pushing off a tree. Fallowing as she heads back over to the camp. After a bit Marc breaks the silence.

"Maybe you should message your soulmate. Ask him what's going on that he is just that pissed."

"I would. But he is in the army. Contact isn't exactly encouraged. Besides, we never confirmed things. We saw one another's soulmark's. We tested it. But for one another we couldn't confirm it."

Marc nods and falls silent. They get back to base where Y/n looks over her tanks. For shits and giggles she entwined a root from one of the mushrooms with her moss. Checking it over. Seeing the roots grow together.

"Looks like that's going to work."

Y/n jots a few notes down and goes to take a nap.

~

The soldier sees her go from her lab to the barracks. Moving slow. Tired. It's near mid day. Everyone is working on things but he knew that she hasn't been sleeping well lately. Given the rage and such that he is feeling from Steve. The Soldat could only assume that y/n was being affected. Affected hard.

He looks around. Seeing everyone off to do things. He looks casual. Blending in with the group. Making sure that no one was watching him as he slipped into the mostly empty barracks.
The Soldat finds her easily enough. She is laying on her left side. Bed against the wall. Knife between the frame and mattress. She's asleep with her boots still on and hanging off the side of the bed. When her face came into a better view his heart melts. It's soft. Much older than the last time he had seen her. But utterly beautiful. True she looked a little sickly. Bags and dark circles under her eyes. Skin pale, he could see her veins through it.

He moves before he knows what he is doing. What he is thinking. He removes her boots and move her legs onto the bed. He removes her jacket and hangs it on the frame of the bed. Pulling a blanket up over her shoulders. Before seeing a small teddy bear in her bag. Head poking out of the top. Just the ears. The Soldat has a soft smile on his face as he moves the bear up a little bit. Giving the small bear a chance to see the rest of the room.

The Soldat looks at her and lock himself. Stopping himself from touching her. Stopping himself from revealing himself to her. Hydra had given him orders to keep an eye on the group. To keep them from the hidden lab. True, Hydra didn't use it anymore due to the radiation. They didn't want the group stumbling into it.

~•~

Steve slouched in the chair he was in. Barely able to keep his eyes open. It makes sense given that it was one in the morning. He had been working tirelessly trying to find where Bucky got to. Trying to make sure that Y/n was safe. Not from him. But from what Hydra would do to her.
Steve tried to control himself. He kept giving it his star spangled try. It's been months since he had gotten the news that y/n was going to the nuclear site. That she would be working along side Helen Cho. Nick had ensured that Helen would be in that to keep a posable eye on anything Hydra related. In her last report she had mentioned that Y/n wasn't doing good. She couldn't sleep.

Sam, Nat and Clint were already asleep but Steve stumbled into his room and fell on his bed. Physically exhausted. His legs hurt a bit. Meaning that Y/n had to physically wear herself out. Closing his eyes Steve quickly falls asleep.

He dreams. For the first time in a long time his dream is pleasant. Well, pleasant to him. He could feel the fire on his skin. But he sees Bucky, rather the soldier, pick up y/n. He can see and feel how the man feels about her. The dream changes to him listening to his handlers finding out about Y/n. The soldier did nothing to expose her.

The dream changes. To one of Steve watching her. Older. More recent. Through the soldiers eyes he helps get her comfortable on her bed. Being careful with her. Steve isn't sure if this is a dream or a memory or something like that. But it was calm and peaceful.

Steve wakes up feeling better and refreshed. Calmer than he had in a while. Everyone sees the look on his face when he enters the den for the morning. Nat and Clint om the other hand glare at him.

"What?"

"Steve. You do realize that your rage is getting to the point that Y/n had to work herself to exhaustion just so she can get sleep right?"

Tony quips as he sips his coffee.

"It's gotten so bad that the higher ups of the project is thinking about taking her off the project."

Steve is alarmed at that. Slowly sipping his coffee.

"That's not good."
"No. It ain't. Not when she is so close to cracking it."

No one needed to ask what Tony meant by 'it'. They all knew.

"This js important to Y/n Steve. You know how much this means to her."

Natasha is soft as she speaks. Trying to get the point across. Steve takes a deep breath and looks into his mug of coffee. As if it held the answers to everything.

"I don't fully understand because I don't know her that well. With Hydra hunting her down and us not being able to find Bucky. I can't control my frustrations. I should. I know this. But with one soulmate missing and the other in one of the most dangerous places in the world. It's hard for me to control it."

Everyone is surprised over how self aware Steve is at the moment. Tony and Clint sip their coffee. As Natasha smiles. Steve gets it. Finally.
Nick enters and Steve sees the man behind him. Sam. He had recommended the man to join them in the team. Be further air support. Something that the team lacked.

Sam sees Steve and nods. Getting one in return.

"This is Sam Wilson. Hes joining the team as Falcon. Given that he is air support. And has wings to move him around."

Nick half heartedly introduced the man to the team. Clint and Tony nods. Nat sips her tea as Nick leaves the team to their devices.
Sam sees them share looks. As if they should let him in on a secret.

"Worried about Y/n?"

Sam's voice is soft. Yet one by one the team nods.

"Yeah. We were kinda ripping into Steve before you came in about how his emotions have been causing her hell."

Tony admits. Leaning on the counter.

"You can try to dampen your side of the bond. That's a technique the military has adopted since World War Two. Or you can try to go on medication to try to do the same thing."

Steve looks at Sam surprised. As does the rest of the team. Sam looks at them all.

"You're acting like you never thought about that."
"Because we didn't. Outside of capcicle you're the only one who's been in the military Sam."

"Yeah. It's been a few years but there's a new formula out that works amazingly. From Elizabeth Rose."

Clint snorts his coffee out of his nose. Looking at Sam.

"Who?"

"Elizabeth Rose.... why?"

"That's one of Y/n's aliases."

The room goes silent. All of them looking at Clint. Even Nat.

"And you kept that hidden from me why?"

Nat questioned. Clint at least looks uncomfortable.

"Laura mentioned it to me in passing. Years ago. I forgot about it."

Clint confessed. Making Tony sip his coffee nodding to himself.

"Since she helped the government before do you think she would help with a little project the United Nations needs help with?"

Everyone looks over to Tony surprised.

"What kind of project?"

"A way to get micro plastics out of the ocean. The breather in her suit can filter anything out. And I mean anything."

Natasha gets this look on her face as if she doesn't want to know.

"One massive project at a time Tony."

"Oh come on Nat. You know as well as I that y/n can bring massive innovation to this. Not just clean the ocean. But make things easier for the wildlife to live."

Nat blinks at Tony. Shocked. The dots connecting to her.

"You think that her tech and plants can do more then just clean up radiation?"

"I do Nat. But I can't reverse engineer several things from her suit"

Nat nods at Tony's words.

"I still say one thing at a time Tony."

~•~

The Soldat went to check the seal to the base. His counter for radiation going off the charts. The seal is cracked.

Not good.