Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

A whisper against his neck, sure hands running up his abdomen to his pecs. Crow never heard the words uttered against his skin, but he felt them somewhere in his soul. Then he found himself lost in miles of blue, a color that only existed in some far away recess of his mind. Somewhere he couldn’t reach.

He always woke from the dreams the same—confused, disoriented, his heart rabbiting in his chest and his cock hard as hell. Skin still tingling from the phantom sensations. He’d lie there after, staring up at the ceiling as he caught his breath attempting to grasp at the fragments. But try as he might, they would slip through his fingers every time. Like wisps of smoke, gone as quickly as they’d come. 

There was a moment, just after he woke, that he thought he might be able to hold onto it—just a piece of it—but it was always just out of reach. As if he were chasing shadows, a memory of a memory that dissipated before he could make any real sense of it.

Crow had a theory, early on, that perhaps if he gave into the dreams, followed wherever they might take him maybe…maybe he could remember something about who he used to be. 

So one day, he rose as he normally did, sweat beading on his skin, heart pounding and his member aching. And without thinking about it too much, he ran his hands down his taunt stomach, reaching down and stroking himself. He kept his eyes closed, desperately clinging to the flitting images.

But each time he got close to something real—more corporeal—it faded away. In the end, there was no satisfaction or release. Only shame. He had attempted several times after, but the end result never changed. It just left him feeling frustrated, in more ways than one.

He wasn’t surprised when the same routine greeted him this morning. With a sigh, he tugged his pants on, buckling his belt into place before running a hand along the shorn side of his hair. The dreams had been coming with increasing frequency lately, leaving him more unsettled and restless than usual.

Many times Crow had wondered if he was dreaming about a past lover. He considered if this person was real or just some figment of his imagination that he’d invented in a world where every Guardian despised him just for existing. But without access to his memories, it didn’t matter much.

“It happened again…didn’t it?” Glint asked as he appeared next to Crow, his voice gentle.

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers. “Please tell me you were not spying on me from subspace…again.”

“I was worried for you! Your heart rate was all over the place.”

“Well, could you worry about me without invading my privacy?” He grumbled as he pulled on his hooded cloak.

Glint made a small sound that was almost sad and when Crow looked over he saw the Ghost’s shell drooping. “I’m sorry, Crow. I was just trying to be helpful. You’re my Guardian.”

“I know…” He replied, his words somber. Glint was the only person in all of Sol who genuinely seemed to care about him. Therefore Crow couldn’t stay mad at him. Not for very long anyway. “Apologies, it’s just—it’s the same every time.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, not right now. Spider has work for me. Another perimeter check around the Tangled Shore. Let’s get this done.”

****

There was nothing particularly exciting about perimeter checks, occasionally a Scorn or two would slip through and Crow would deal with them via a bullet between the eyes. There was an upside though, they offered him time away from Spider’s hideout. Being adrift in all of Sol, with no purpose to be had was one thing…being treated like a pretty little bird in a cage was another.

When Crow had first Risen, he found himself in the Dreaming City, a soft silken shroud laid over his body with such care he hadn’t the heart to throw it away. It wasn’t long after that he started running into other Guardians. Their reactions to seeing his face were…well, mixed, to say the least. Some would just kill him on sight, without a second thought. 

Others would beat him first, then put a round in his skull for good measure. This happened so often that Crow developed what he could only describe as the freeze response. He would see another Guardian and all thoughts to fight or flee simply ceased to exist, allowing them to do whatever they wanted to him. He was lucky if they only looked at him with disdain and left him to his own devices. 

The worst part was, he didn’t understand why they treated him this way. Then he had started to get some pieces to the puzzle, not many. But a few. Enough to determine it wasn’t him they were punishing but…rather someone he used to be. He hadn’t the courage to dig any deeper than that, in truth he didn’t want to know. 

He had no place in this world and perhaps he wasn’t meant to. And why the Traveler would choose him…why Glint would choose him—that would never make any sense to Crow. He was sure of it.

It was Spider’s people who had found him, adrift in the vacuum of space. Dying and being reborn only to die again. It had felt like an eternity. So when Spider had offered to give Crow protection, at the time it seemed like the best deal someone like him would ever get. 

Now he was bound here. With his past looming over him like a shadow he couldn’t escape. He sighed a little as he walked the edges of Spider’s territory, stopping for a moment to collect himself. 

The hairs rose on the back of his neck almost as if he could sense that eyes were on him. Crow pulled his Hand Cannon from the holster and whirled around, finding nothing but the hostile wasteland of the Tangled Shore staring back at him. 

A bullet whizzed by his head, narrowly missing him to hit a large rock instead. He quickly dove out of the way, shoving his back up against a boulder. Crow looked around to find the shooter but saw nothing. 

Then a trip mine struck the rock directly in front of him, its red light blinking as it beeped frantically. He rolled out of the way just before it exploded, sending dirt and debris flying into the air. His chest heaved as adrenaline rushed through his veins, someone was definitely after him. Scorn didn’t go out of their way to be clever. 

More bullets came flying at him, and it was only his quick reflexes that kept him from getting hit. His eyes scanned the horizon, seeing a figure coming right at him.  

A Guardian. And a Hunter to boot. Just his luck. He aimed, ready to take the shot when a weighted knife sliced through the air, tearing the weapon from his hand and throwing him backward.

He hit the ground with a heavy thud, momentarily disoriented as he scrambled until his fingers finally found his gun, pointing it at his aggressor. 

Those eyes. They were almost like the glinting edge of a blade in the moonlight. His breath caught in his chest, finding himself in that freeze response again, unable to so much as move a muscle while the other man’s gaze bore down on him. It was in that moment Crow realized he knew him.

It was the Hunter Vanguard, Cayde-6.

Impossible.

Cayde’s grip was steady on the Hand Cannon he was holding, but it was his gaze that was pinned Crow in place, not the weapon. There was something familiar in it, something at the edges of his mind that he couldn’t place. 

He wondered if Cayde was looking at him…or someone else.

“You died,” Crow finally blurted out. Cayde tightened his hold on his gun, and for a moment, Crow thought he might pull the trigger. Any other Guardian in his place would have done so already. He heard Glint appear beside him but he didn’t move, even as his heart pounded erratically in his ears.

Cayde’s eyes flicked to Glint briefly before returning to Crow’s face and his expression seemed to soften, replaced by realization. “So did you.” Then the other male did something Crow would have never predicted. Not in a thousand lifetimes. 

He holstered his weapon and offered his hand. 

Crow looked at Cayde and his outstretched hand, trying to gauge whether or not this was just a ploy. But it wasn’t. Somehow, he knew that without a doubt. He took Cayde’s hand, the touch instantly met with a rush of warmth, like the sun when it broke through the dark of night, its rays illuminating the shadowed valleys of Crow’s mind.

Cayde pulled him to his feet with ease, his Solar Light radiating through their clasped hands when he tugged them closer. “I don’t have to call you Prince anymore right?” The question was filled with light-hearted affection, but the title held no significance for Crow. It was a relic of his past life—one he no longer remembered and had no wish to. 

“I don’t know who that is.” He said as he released Cayde’s hand. “I’m Crow.”

****

“So, you know who I am, huh?” Cayde’s voice echoed lightly from behind as they walked along the hidden cave path leading back to Spider’s hideout.

“Everyone knows who you are.” Crow’s voice faltered for a moment, the weight of the impossible pressing down on him. Cayde’s death had been all over Sol. He shouldn’t be here.  

And yet... Crow turned back, his gaze lingering on the Exo. “You’re Cayde-6.” It was truly him. He was certain of it. His heart hammered in his chest at the realization. Then he quickly changed topics. “We’re close. Spider’s not going to like you sticking your nose in his business, so we should get to him first.”

“Think he’ll recognize me?”

Crow shrugged. “Who’s to say? He only deals with the Vanguard when he has to. If you want to stay discreet, you might want a helmet. Although…” He stopped, hesitating before looking at Cayde again. “Everyone thinks you’re dead. As in, Final Death, dead.”

“And I need to keep it that way. Top-secret mission, you know how it is. No one—especially the Vanguard—can know I’m still breathing.”

He raised a skeptical eyebrow. “I’m shocked they haven’t figured it out already. You’re not exactly subtle, even in that.” He gestured to Cayde’s worn, muted Hunter armor.

Cayde gave a low chuckle. “Well, I suppose that makes you the only one smart enough to piece it together.”

“Lucky guess.” Crow tried for humor, but the words came out flat, almost monotone. His mind kept circling back to the impossibility of what was happening. They stopped at the hologram of the stone wall, the entrance to Spider’s lair. “This is it.”

When Crow met Cayde’s eyes again something shifted. A flicker of emotion passed through Cayde’s features so brief it was almost imperceptible. Crow’s pulse quickened but before he could fully process it, Cayde turned away and headed into the hideout, leaving the unspoken moment hanging between them.

Inside Spider sat cradled in the middle of a dark, oval-shaped room. His four glowing eyes watched with intrigue as they approached him. Two guards stood on either side of the crimelord, wielding spears that lit up with Arc energy, their backs full of massive spikes. They were no threat to Crow but he couldn’t say the same for the Hunter Vanguard standing next to him.

“Ah, my little bird returns to the nest,” Spider said, his voice low and guttural. “And it looks like he brought another Guardian, how quaint.”

“Heard you got yourself a Scorn problem?” Cayde said, cutting right to the chase.

“Indeed,” Spider leaned forward a bit, folding his two secondary hands together as he regarded the Hunter with his sharp gaze, his size and mass making him a formidable figure. 

“Tell me where I can find them, and I’ll clear them out for you.”

Spider seemed to think about this for a long moment. “Well, I certainly know the locations of these Scorn. I’ll be happy to provide them to you if you do something for me first. Call it a quid pro quo. Builds trust. Complete a few tasks for me, any Guardian worth their salt should have no issue getting what I require. Return to me and we’ll strike a deal.”

“Great, always wanted to be an errand boy,” Cayde added the tasks to his tracker, sparing one more glance at Crow.

“Leave us, little bird. I wish to speak to this Guardian alone.” Spider commanded. Crow shifted his stance at this news, wanting to protest against it but he knew better than to question the crime lord. He inclined his head silently and walked out of the room. Crow didn’t go very far though, curious to see what Spider might say to Cayde.

“My little bird sure is something, isn’t he? I have to imagine you share in my appreciation of fate’s cruel sense of humor. I found him wandering the Reef, like a piece of wind-blown trash. Aimless, hopeless. No memory of the Prince he once was. Now, I could have sent him off to The Tower—but we all know what’s waiting for him there. I couldn’t let that happen, so I took him in as a kindness.”

“How noble of you…” He heard Cayde mutter. “You know in my experience, prisoners aren’t usually the most loyal.”

“As far as his loyalty is concerned…I took a few extra precautions and made some ‘modifications’ to his Ghost’s shell. Now, if he ever flies too far from the nest.” The Eliksni paused for effect. “Boom. With that ugly business out of the way, my little bird will be keeping an eye on you,” Spider spoke up, a low growl leaving him. “He’ll ensure you come back to me in one piece.”

****

Devastating news from the Tower today, sources say that the beloved Hunter Vanguard, Cayde-6, was killed in action during a heroic attempt to stop the escape of several Scorn Barons and—

He was gunned down in cold blood, by his own weapon, no less. The Vanguard leadership remains divided on how to proceed with such an enormous loss while the Last City is plunged into mourning one of their own. 

A statue has been erected in honor of the Hunter Vanguard, who was known for his wit, his sense of humor, and his love of a good prank. A silent vigil will be held this evening to remember The Man They Called Cayde.

Crow paced in his quarters rather frantically as his thoughts circled endlessly, one chasing the next like an Ouroboros eating its own tail. Cayde was alive. This couldn’t—shouldn’t be possible. And yet…he’d seen him. Standing right there. Heard his voice, that unmistakable drawl. He’d touched him—felt the warmth of the Hunter’s grip under his fingertips, solid and real. Crow had looked him in the eyes, the color of which pierced into the depths of his soul.

For a moment, he considered that it might be a trick, a ruse of some kind. The thought gnawed at him, Crow was no stranger to deception and the Reef was full of any number of people ready and willing to take advantage of him. 

But some instinct—something buried—made him sure that wasn’t the case. A sensation he couldn’t name or describe but felt with absolute certainty. That was Cayde-6. He knew, without being able to explain how that he hadn’t witnessed a ghost or an imitation. 

He was the real deal. 

Crow forced himself to sit down, his knees feeling a little weak. None of this made any sense. Why would the Tower put out reports about Cayde’s death if they weren’t true? What was he even doing in the Reef? He seemed rather insistent that the Vanguard remain in the dark regarding his whereabouts. 

There was only one thing left to do. And that was to get to the bottom of it. Crow was stuck tailing the guy anyway. He figured he might as well do something useful with that time. 

He took a deep breath, inhaling slowly and holding it for a moment before releasing it. A trick Glint had taught him whenever the panic attacks threatened to take hold. If he was going to do this, he would have to be prepared for anything. From what little he knew about Cayde, the guy had a reputation for being what some might call a Wildcard. 

Which meant Crow would need his wits about him.

He managed to get back onto his feet then he checked his weapon and the knives at his waist just as one of Spider’s cronies appeared at the door.

“He wishes to speak with you,” it said in Eliksni. Crow nodded and followed the creature back out to Spider, immediately noticing that Cayde was already gone.

“Yes, Baron Spider?” He asked softly.

“I need you to follow that Guardian, see what he’s up to. Make sure he doesn’t get any wise ideas. Something tells me he’s here for more than just Scorn.”

At least that was something they could agree on. Crow bowed slightly and quickly exited the hideout.

Chapter Text

Crow picked up Cayde’s trail not far outside Trapper’s Cave. He entered carefully, pulling his weapon from the holster as he walked through. The air felt cooler down here, tinged with a slight wetness from the streams of water that ran throughout. Moss hung down from the ceiling and thick grass had sprouted all over the cave’s floor. 

He ventured in deeper, his every sense on high alert, his eyes darting to every potential hiding spot. His fingers tightened around his weapon as he edged around a large boulder, then carefully peeked around the corner—only to find an empty path stretching deeper into the darkness. 

No sign of Cayde.

Crow frowned as he took another cautious step forward. The silence in the cave felt almost unnatural, broken only by the occasional drip of water from the stalactites overhead. His breath misted in the cold air, and he scanned the ceiling and corners, looking for any hint of movement.

Strange, he thought Cayde’s trail had been so easy to follow but now it was like it had all but disappeared. He felt a prickling sensation on the back of his neck again, the same as he had earlier when Cayde had caught him by surprise. He whirled around and once again found himself face to face with the Exo Hunter.

“You need better boots,” Cayde said casually, his arms crossed as he pinned Crow in place with those glowing blue eyes of his. “I could hear you comin’ a mile off. Best replace ‘em soon as you can. Otherwise, your sneaking days are gonna be over real soon.”

“How did you—”

“Come on, you think I was born yesterday? Spider all but told me you’d be tailing me. Not very smart.” Damn it. Not only had Cayde lured him here but he’d fallen for it. He watched as Cayde let his arms fall to his sides, walking past Crow as he continued speaking. “Actually, I was betting on it. Seems I was right. This boss of yours is going to be a real pain in the ass.”

“Not sure why you assumed he’d give you information for free,” Crow replied dryly, keeping his eyes on the path. Spider never acted without a price, and he wasn’t the charitable type. 

Whatever Cayde wanted, it would cost—one way or another. Crow knew that all too well.

Cayde shrugged. “Guess I’m used to holding all the cards.”

They walked in silence for a beat, the sound of their footsteps mixing with the trickle of water. Crow’s eyes flicked over to the Exo as he heard him draw a breath.

“So… what brought you here? Last I heard—” Cayde began casually, but then his voice wavered, and he stopped dead in his tracks, his next words hanging in the air. “Never mind.”

Crow felt the weight of the unfinished question lingering between them. What was that about? His gaze narrowed, studying the Hunter’s posture. 

“I first woke up in the Dreaming City,” Crow replied softly, not wanting to dwell on what Cayde hadn’t said. “I ran into Guardians pretty early on. They weren’t kind.” He kept the details vague, not only because he didn’t want to think about it but because he wasn’t sure how much to share. “I drifted for a while until Spider’s people found me.”

“And so he took you in?”

“Not without his conditions. Same as everyone else.”

Cayde hummed in acknowledgment as they rounded a corner. “Yeah, he uh…might’ve mentioned those.”

He sighed in response, the sound echoing off the walls. “I can’t stray too far from the nest. He’s rigged my Ghost to be…destroyed if I try.” The silence between them thickened, but this time it was heavier, more deliberate. Crow finally broke it. “Why are you hiding from the Vanguard?”

“Not hiding.” Cayde’s response came quickly—too quickly. “I told you. Top-secret mission.” His index finger tapped the handle of the Hand Cannon on his hip as he spoke. Crow’s brow furrowed, sensing the half-truth in his words, but he didn’t press further. 

Whatever Cayde’s reasons for hiding out here, they were his own.

As they neared a deeper tunnel, Crow gestured. “I think what you’re looking for is down here.”

Before he could take another step, a firm grip wrapped around his arm, and in a blur of motion, Cayde yanked him back, pinning him against the wall. Crow’s chest tightened, and his body froze. Cayde pressed close, his breath warm against Crow’s cheek as he whispered, “They don’t call it Trapper’s Cave for nothing.”

Crow’s eyes darted to the floor, finding a series of trip mines scattered like hidden death traps. He swallowed hard, his heart racing. Of course.

“You alright?” Cayde’s voice softened, concern cutting through his usual bravado. Crow tried to breathe, but the sensation of Cayde’s body so close had his mind tangled in knots. His skin prickled where Cayde’s hand had touched him as he fought to regain his voice.

“I’m fine,” he muttered, forcing the words out past the tightness in his chest. “A little warning next time would be nice.” Cayde released him, stepping away, but the warmth of his presence lingered. Crow shivered, trying to shake it off. 

He watched the Hunter kneel beside the mines, his fingers working deftly as he began to disarm them. Crow’s eyes stayed glued to him, watching Cayde’s hands move with confident precision.

Cayde stopped, glancing back at Crow. Their eyes met, and for a heartbeat, Something deep and unguarded flickered across Cayde’s face. In that split second, Crow caught a glimpse of it—grief, raw and ragged, like a gaping wound.

His heart stuttered and before he could even fully process it, Cayde’s fingers slipped on the mechanism, the soft click of metal too loud in the quiet cave. Crow tensed as he heard Cayde curse under his breath, dismantling the trap with a low growl of frustration.

“Got it,” Cayde proclaimed, his normal grin having slipped right back into place, making Crow wonder if he’d seen anything at all or if he’d imagined it. “Just uh…tricky mechanism inside but it's all under control.” 

Once he completed his task, Cayde reached the cache that Spider had requested and added it to his inventory. “Well, if you’re gonna be keepin’ tabs on me you might as well drop the attempt at being incognito about it and just tag along. Easier for both of us.”

Crow clenched his jaw a bit, feeling uncertain about it. But he knew that Cayde was right, there was no point in clandestine maneuvers—the gig was up before it had even begun. 

“Fine. Let’s just make it quick.”

****

Their next location was Kingship Dock a once bustling point of trade and commerce the shipping yard had been owned by the House of Kings but now, thanks to the Barons, it was a hollowed-out shell of its former glory days. The stench of decay hung thick in the air, old containers, and half-rotted cargo holds littered the area overrun by Scorn.

“Really starting to hate these guys,” Crow heard Cayde grumble next to him. A distant skittering sound echoed through the docks, followed by an eerie screech. 

“Skreebs,” Crow remarked as he looked around, trying to pinpoint the source of the noises. “Sounds like they’re closing in.”

“Yep.” Cayde pulled his Hand Cannon out. “Get ready, they’re about to be right on top of us.” Crow followed suit, drawing his weapon from its holster. His eyes darted around, trying to locate them in the darkness. 

A blue glowing blob fell onto the tip of his weapon, wisps of Dark Ether coming off of it. Crow then looked up just in time to see a whole group of Skreebs above them, having crawled onto the ceiling. 

“Move!” He darted off to the side right as one of them dive-bombed the spot where he had just been landing, kamikaze-ing itself into a blast of Scorn blood and Dark Ether. Cayde shot several of them as they backed up in unison, exploding them on impact. 

“I just had to call it, didn’t I? Had to say they were going to be on top of us.” He fanned the hammer of the gun, firing off several rounds in rapid succession, each bullet finding its mark causing the creatures to burst in a fantastical display of glowing blue blood and guts. 

“If we don’t start thinning their numbers they’re going to bring this whole place down,” Crow shouted as he took out a few more.

Cayde glowed as bright as the sun next to him, focusing his Solar Light into a series of glowing daggers in his hand. They flew in a perfect arc, taking out the remaining Skreebs. Crow glanced over, caught off guard by the ease and rhythm in which they worked together.

Almost…like they’d done this before.

“Lighten up, Crow,” Cayde called out, a grin in his voice. “Brood any harder, and the Skreebs will think they’re winning.”

Before Crow had any time to retort, the atmosphere thickened, and heavy footsteps echoed through the darkness a massive Scorn Ravager charged toward them, brandishing flaming torches. The creature swung them at Cayde, who barely ducked under it in time, hot embers showering around him. He raised his Hand Cannon and fired three quick shots into the beast's chest, forcing it to stagger back. 

But it wasn’t done.

Crow reacted quickly and shot it in the leg, distracting it from its next attack. With a quick roll, Cayde dodged again, aiming for the head this time before he pulled the trigger.

“Nice shot.”

“Guess they were wrong about my teamwork skills,” Cayde said, reloading his Hand Cannon with a deliberate flick of his wrist, the tension still crackling in the air. Crow's silence hung heavily between them, like a storm of unsaid words. “Right, let’s move.”

They delved deeper into the docks, finding the cache located in an old building. Cayde sat on the floor as he pulled some makeshift lockpicking tools from his inventory, which consisted of a pair of pliers and a thin metal stick. “So…” he started to talk while he worked. “How’d you know it was me?”

“What kind of question is that?” Crow replied, irritation slipping into his voice. How could he even begin to answer that question when he wasn’t sure of the answer himself?

“How’d you know I wasn’t just some Hunter Vanguard fanboy? Been seeing lots of ‘em don my old hood. Even seen a couple damn good replicas of the Ace of Spades …” Cayde said, his voice losing some of its usual playfulness. “Guess you’ve got better eyes than most.” 

There was a long moment of silence before Crow managed to muster a reply. “I know a fake when I see one,” his crossed arms fell to his sides, posture shifting from one foot to the other. “Did we know each other?” he averted his gaze as he asked the question, hiding his face in the shadow of his hood. 

He heard the makeshift tools clatter to the floor and the thin piece of metal Cayde had been holding rolled across the ground, disappearing through a grate in the floor.

"Damn it," the other man muttered, a note of frustration in his voice. "Could swear I used to be better at this."

“Allow me.” Was the only warning Crow gave before his boot came down on the chest, busting the lock with a resounding crack. It popped open easily, revealing a stash of dead Ghosts. 

“Well, that’s not the least bit creepy,” Cayde added them to his inventory. “One lost sector left.”

****

Their last location was Wolfship Turbine, a crashed House of Wolves ship that had been turned into a Hive nest. Crow was sure in its heyday the massive Ketch would have flown its colors proudly, striking fear into the enemy below. 

But now it lay dormant, filled with jagged twisting structures that looked like bone. The walls pulsed with an ominous green color, seeming to move in a constant subtle manner as if the nest were a living breathing thing all around them. As they ventured in deeper, clusters of spiked formations jutted out of the ground and walls, having grown over every conceivable surface of the old warship.

The air here felt heavy and oppressive and that didn’t even begin to cover the stench of the place. While Scorn smelled like the ass-end of a swamp, Hive nests reeked of old rotten decay. It was both pungent and overpowering, mixed with the earthy scent of fungi that was sure to be growing in the soil somewhere. 

He saw Cayde draw his weapon as the floor underneath began to quake, a wave of Thralls with two Acolytes having emerged from the shadow of the nest. The Thralls came at them in an organized swarm allowing him to shoot several of them in the head. 

Crow remained a bit further back, firing off his Hand Cannon to pick off the Acolytes from a distance. As the wave of Thralls drew closer one of them slipped through, going straight for him. One of Cayde’s weighted knives came sailing through the air before it struck true, slamming into the Thrall’s skull. 

Crow flinched as the knife hit its mark and then turned to Cayde, his voice sharp. “I could’ve handled it.” 

“How’s Spider going to figure out I’m loyal if you don’t tell him?” Cayde walked over to the dead Thrall and yanked his knife out of its skull, some of its sticky neon green innards spraying everywhere when he pulled it free. He wiped it clean on the thigh of his pants and sheathed it with the others. 

There was something about the shape of the blade and its hilt…Crow briefly glanced at the knife on his own belt. 

They were of the same make. Odd.

“You didn’t respond to my question earlier.” There was an edge now to his voice. 

“Trust me kid, it doesn’t matter,” Cayde replied casually without looking at him. But Crow knew better. He might be a newly Risen with little knowledge of how things worked but Cayde was keeping something close to the chest.

“Not sure why I asked,” He quickly holstered his weapon again as they continued through the Ketch until they came to the final cache. “I wouldn’t want the answer anyway,” he muttered, voice tense with the sting of rejection.

Crow signaled to move forward, taking the lead as they maneuvered out of the ketch. 

As they neared the ship's exit, the ground trembled under Crow’s feet. He stopped in his tracks, scanning the shadows that twisted and stretched across the dilapidated interior, trying to determine the source. He narrowed his eyes, still listening, feeling as if the hairs on the back of his neck were prickling with a sense of unease even though he had none. 

With another step forward the tremor returned, this time stronger. It began to shake more violently, causing dust to rain down from the ceiling along with a few loose chunks of debris, echoing off the walls when they clattered across the cold metal floor.

"Something’s coming," Cayde whispered next to him, his hand already resting on the hilt of his Hand Cannon while his index finger tapped against the handle. "Something big."

Crow's eyes darted to the flickering lights above them, before shifting back to their only exit. "Maybe we should think about getting out of here while we still can," he replied, his voice strained but measured. His body was angled slightly toward the corridor behind them.

"Yeah, I’m with you on that one." He and Cayde turned together, their bodies unnaturally in sync as they retreated towards the exit, but only managed a few paces before a deafening roar ripped through the air. The shadows in the far corner twisted, and from the darkness emerged a massive Hive Ogre. It towered over them, its grotesque form making the already confined turbine room feel impossibly small.

"Well, time for Plan B!" Cayde then fired off several rounds, the sharp cracks of gunfire echoing through the chamber. The bullets slammed into the Ogre’s thick hide, but instead of slowing the beast, it only seemed to piss it off. Its roar rattled the room, and in a terrifying burst of speed, it charged right for them.

"That was your Plan B? What the hell was Plan A?" Crow cried out as he dodged some fallen debris.

"Run!" Cayde shouted as he ran back the way they came. Crow was right on his six, his legs pumping as he vaulted over a piece of broken machinery. The Ogre was relentless, crashing through the turbines as though they were made of paper. Sparks exploded from shattered wires, and chunks of twisted metal flew everywhere, creating a deadly storm of debris in its wake.

The ground shook with each thunderous step the creature took, and Crow felt the heat from the sparking turbines growing, scorching the air around them. He skidded to a halt behind a massive chunk of broken turbines blocking their path. The Ogre’s merciless smashing had made their only means of escape all but impassable.

"That damn thing is blocking our one way out," Cayde growled, frustration creeping into his voice as he spun around, gun still ready.

"That’s not the only problem." Crow jerked his head toward the remaining turbines. They were glowing red-hot now, buzzing with dangerous energy. "If those turbines blow, we’re done for."

"Great," Cayde muttered in response, peeking over the debris as the Ogre loomed closer. "Just what we needed."

Crow took in their surroundings, his sharp eyes flickering from the collapsed turbines to the barely functioning machinery surrounding them. "There’s got to be another way out. We can’t stay here much longer."

The Ogre roared again, the heat from the turbines becoming unbearable, while the floor beneath their feet began to vibrate. With the beast just feet away and the turbines close to meltdown, they needed a solution, fast.

"Got it," Cayde said suddenly, a crooked grin breaking through the tension. "We don’t fight the beast. We trap it."

Crow frowned. "And how do we do that exactly?"

The Hunter gestured toward the nearest turbine, which was glowing hotter by the second. "We get that thing to hit the turbines hard enough to trigger an overload. The blast’ll trap it under a mountain of metal and give us a chance to slip through whatever’s left."

Crow blinked, then nodded, the plan sinking in. "Risky, but better than becoming Hive chow." He readied his Hand Cannon, aiming toward the Ogre. "Let’s make it angry."

"Well, you're in luck kid. That's my specialty," Cayde said with a playful wink. He aimed his Hand Cannon at the Ogre’s face, waiting for just the right moment. "Here goes nothing."

The bullet soared through the air and struck the Ogre square between its burning red eyes. The creature let out an enraged howl and charged again, barreling toward the turbines.

"Move!" Cayde shouted, and they both dove to the side as the Ogre crashed headfirst into the turbines. Sparks erupted in a blinding display, and the room shuddered as the machinery began to buckle under the strain.

The heat grew unbearable while the whirring sounds of the turbines reached a fever pitch. A large section of the turbine broke loose from above and crashed down on top of the Ogre and Cayde as well, pinning him to the ground with a loud thud.

"Cayde!" Crow skidded to a halt, horror flooding his face as he saw the Hunter struggling beneath the heavy metal. He rushed over, eyes darting to the Ogre that was already free from the wreckage and now advancing on their position. The ground quaked under its enormous feet, each step bringing it closer.

Cayde grunted in pain, trying to force the twisted metal off him, but it wouldn’t budge. "Little help here?" he called out, his voice strained, though he couldn’t help the wry grin that flickered across his face. "Not my best moment, I admit."

Crow grimaced and dropped to one knee, gripping the edge of the metal slab with both hands. He heaved with all his strength as he tried to lift the debris. The Ogre let out another furious roar, picking up speed, and closing the distance fast.

"Crow!" Cayde hissed, looking past him at the charging behemoth. "Any time now!"

With a final burst of effort, Crow managed to shift the slab just enough for Cayde to wiggle free. The Hunter scrambled out from beneath the metal, groaning as he rubbed his shoulder, but there was no time to recover. "Go!" Cayde urged, struggling to stand. "Get out of here!"

Crow straightened up, eyes locked on the Ogre, which was almost on top of them now.

"No. We’re finishing this." Before Cayde could protest, Crow aimed his weapon, his expression hardening with determination as he took a slow deep breath.

The Ogre raised a massive fist, ready to smash them both into the ground but Crow didn’t flinch. He pulled the trigger, an arc round burying itself deep in the creature’s chest. The energy surged through the beast’s body, causing it to stagger back into the turbines which burst in a fantastic series of explosions that rocked the earth beneath them.

Another large explosion burst through the corridor, threatening to bring the whole place down right on top of them. Without a word between them, they both made a mad dash towards the exit, practically leaping out of it just as the place blew itself to hell. They both collapsed there, panting wildly as the sounds of destruction continued to play out behind them.

"Well..." Cayde said breathlessly. "I saved you, you saved me." Crow caught the way Cayde was smiling to himself—like he was laughing at some inside joke that Crow wasn’t a part of. "I'd say that makes us even."

Crow looked at him again, his eyes searching Cayde’s face for a few moments before he nodded silently. 

****

Crow watched as Cayde stepped out of Spider’s hideout, the first Scorn Baron’s location now firmly set in his tracker. 

As he walked, he fell into step beside him, his voice barely above audible. “Drinks are on me.”

Cayde nodded, with a hint of a smile. They navigated through the twisted alleys of Thieve’s Landing until they found a bar nestled between shadowy buildings. Inside, they settled onto a pair of worn leather stools, the low hum of conversation and clinking glasses filling the space.

Crow’s gaze drifted to the blue liquid swirling in his glass, allowing the hood of his cloak to obscure his expression. Truth be told, he had never indulged in alcohol, his little Ghost would surely have several lectures prepared for him when he returned to Spider’s hideout later.

“Hey, Crow.” Cayde’s robotic lilt pulled him out of his thoughts. He held himself as if ready to bolt in a heartbeat, still carrying the scars of past betrayals from other Guardians. “Toast? To being partners?” His voice was softer, filled with a sincerity Crow wasn’t sure he was worthy of.

A flicker of hope ignited in Crow’s chest, lighting him up like a lantern in the darkness. 

“To being partners,” Crow replied, his voice barely above a whisper as their glasses clinked together. At that moment, the noise of the bar faded into the background, leaving only the fragile connection between them—a shared truce that felt like a new beginning.

Chapter Text

Crow stayed hidden around the corner, his hood drawn down to hide his face. He hadn’t expected Cayde to return to Spider’s hideout so soon.  And yet here he was. Bargaining with the Eliksni. His brows knitted together as he listened in on their conversation.

“Back for more already, Guardian?” Spider chuckled low and deep, the sound resonating through the room. “I have already given you a lead, that is far more generous than most would do in my position.”

“I want to alter the terms of our arrangement.” Cayde’s responded in his normal casual manner yet his words seemed to carry weight. “I want Crow to run point with me.”

What? He hadn’t discussed this with Crow at all. His heart picked up the pace. Sure their time in the Lost Sectors had been interesting…and Cayde had mentioned being partners but Crow didn’t want to allow himself to hope.

Spider barked a loud thunderous laugh at the very notion of the idea. “How would that possibly benefit me? With the help of my little bird, you’ll clear out these Scorn far too quickly and I won’t get my end of the bargain.”

“I can make him a better asset to you,” Cayde countered. “The kid’s good, I’ll give him that. He’s got the natural instincts of a decent Hunter. But you pair him with me, well…I’ll let the results speak for themselves. I think we both know who I am, and I’m willing to wager keeping that secret between us if you let him tag along.”

“And what do I get out of this, exactly?”

“The best damn Guardian at your beck and call.”

The crimelord was quiet as he seemed to consider this, one of his primary hands scratching his chin as the other idly played with the dead Ghost. His two secondaries twitched but remained folded in his lap as he contemplated. 

“I didn’t really think it was you, ‘till just now. I see that fire in your eyes…my little bird doesn’t have that.” Spider sighed, the sound low and throaty as it rasped through his mask. “Take him with you. Just…don’t mention the name Uldren Sov. For his sake. And Guardian…if he fails, it’ll be your head on the chopping block.”

So that was it. Crow stalked back off to his quarters. He should have known better. Cayde was just making a deal with Spider to keep his presence in the Tangled Shore a secret from the Vanguard. It had nothing at all to do with helping Crow, not really. His heart sank a little, the flicker of hope he’d felt when they’d made their pact at the bar a few nights ago felt so fragile now—as if it were struggling to stay lit.

Perhaps he needed to stop waiting for someone to rescue him and just rescue himself already. After all, he had gotten himself into this mess with Spider. He’d find a way out.

Somehow.

He ran a hand along the shorn side of his head. Yeah, right. He’d been doing such a stellar job of untangling the web he’d found himself in. 

And that name…

Uldren Sov.

It wasn’t the first time Crow had heard it. It likely wouldn’t be the last. The damn thing felt like a curse that followed him wherever he went. He was certain it had something to do with his past. Why else would Spider try so hard to keep him from it?

So long as Crow was in the dark he was powerless. Bound to do Spider’s bidding for as long as the Eliksni found it amusing. He saw Cayde begin to walk towards him and slipped away to his part of Spider’s hideout quickly. By the time Cayde caught up with him, Crow had pulled his gun from the holster and a soft cloth, pretending as if he’d been cleaning his weapon all along.

Cayde paused just inside the doorway, his intense blue eyes boring right into Crow’s very soul. That nagging feeling returned, the one Crow had felt when he’d been caught dead to rights during his perimeter check and again when they’d been inside the Trapper’s Cave. When Cayde’s expression reeked of grief, pain, and sorrow.

“Cayde…?” He ventured quietly, his voice seemed to bring the Hunter out of whatever spell had come over him. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, you want to be a Guardian don’t you?”

“Thought I already was.”

“Why don’t we find out?”

****

“You sure you’re not one of my Hunters? You certainly move like one,” Cayde commented as he weaved ahead of Crow through the bustling bazaar. 

Crow shrugged as he sidestepped a merchant carrying a basket of glowing crystals. “It’s like it's not…It doesn’t feel fully realized if that makes any sense.” The Exo stopped abruptly, glancing over at a nearby booth where a vendor was selling an assortment of items—incense, candles, and trinkets that glimmered in the fading light. 

He picked up a small bundle of incense sticks, absentmindedly inspecting them as he responded. “That’s because you’re not meditating.”

Crow raised a skeptical brow, crossing his arms over his chest as he watched Cayde sift through the merchant’s wares. “No offense, but you don’t really come off as the ‘meditating’ type.”

“No?” Cayde chuckled softly. “Bit of advice, don’t bother trying to get a read on me, kid. Wiser men than you have tried and failed. I’m what they call a Wildcard.” He picked up a few sticks of incense and paid the merchant. “We have to start by finding a quiet place, somewhere you can call out to the Light and have it answer.”

“This all sounds very…I don’t know…mystical?”

Cayde shrugged, unfazed. “What, you thought being a Guardian was all guns and glory? Sometimes, it’s about listening. And if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you won’t find the answers you’re looking for in all this noise.”

“Okay,” Crow said slowly, his gaze shifting back to Cayde. “Where exactly are we supposed to go?”

“I have a hideout on the edge of the outpost. It’s quiet there. None of the hustle and bustle of Theive’s Landing. We’ll go there. After all, a Hunter’s place isn’t among all this,” He motioned at the crowded bazaar. He adjusted his stance, slipping his hand onto his belt as he gestured toward the distant horizon. “It’s in the Wilds.”

****

“Uh, just wait right here a moment I have to make sure the place isn’t a complete disaster.” Cayde cleared his throat awkwardly as he stood on the doorstep to a hollowed-out skiff that was partially buried under rock and stone. 

Crow raised an inquisitive eyebrow but decided not to press. He watched Cayde slip inside, closing the door in his face. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a racket coming from inside the skiff. As if the other man were haphazardly tossing things or closing drawers abruptly.

“Everything okay in there?” Crow said from the other side of the door.

“Yep!” Came a strained reply. “All good!” Finally, the door opened again. “Welcome, to my humble abode.” He stepped aside, allowing Crow to walk in.

Crow looked around curiously taking in the space as he wandered through it. The hollowed-out skiff wasn’t much to look at but Crow spotted little things that felt like Cayde had left his mark on the place. A deck of cards on the worn kitchen table, empty glasses near by. An old workbench where Hand Cannons and tools were strewn on its surface, half of them stripped for parts.

He made his way over to the workbench, his gaze lingering on the various holes in the wall, where pushpins might have been. Crow reached out, his fingertips brushing over the holes, following one to the next. Almost as if Cayde had been keeping tabs on the whereabouts of something or… someone. 

Crow dropped his hand and turned back to the other male. “You really need this many guns Cayde?”

“A man can never be too prepared,” Cayde remarked. “Come on.” Then Cayde ushered him out the back door to the patio. The sky was particularly beautiful tonight. A tapestry of deep purples and indigos dominated the horizon, speckled with clusters of distant stars that shimmered like scattered jewels across the void. Nebulas of swirling pinks and soft blues stretched across the heavens, their glowing tendrils reaching out as if suspended in the air.

Cayde pulled out one of the incense sticks he’d purchased earlier, sticking it in a holder on the one lone table that was on the porch. He snapped his fingers, summoning a small flame to light it and then walked to the edge of the patio and sat down, crossing his legs. He rested his hands on his knees, palms up, and closed his eyes. Crow wondered where exactly the Hunter had picked up this particular technique. “Let’s go Feathers. Daylight’s wastin' away here.”

“Fine,” Crow grumbled a little before he joined the other male, sitting down next to him. He couldn’t bring himself to mirror Cayde’s pose, instead choosing to sit cross-legged with his elbows on his knees. One hand idly fidgeting with the leather strap across his thigh. “So…how do we do this?”

“We start by breathing. Simple.”

“That’s it? That’s not very helpful.”

“You’re overthinking it.” Cayde looked at him, his expression softening. “Remember what I said about the noise of Theive’s Landing? There’s noise in your head too. A lot of it right?” The Exo raised his eyebrow plating, causing Crow’s heart to rabbit a little. “Wondering how I knew?” He tapped the side of his own metal skull with his knuckles. “Mine never shuts up.”

It was strange to think that Cayde understood what that was like, to have a never-ending inner dialogue that criticized and judged every interaction, every choice. He hadn’t come off as the kind of guy who worried about things. Crow thought back to the times when Cayde’s playful mask had slipped. They were just slivers, mere seconds where he’d seen a man struggling with something Crow couldn’t put into words. 

He sucked in a slow deep breath, closing his eyes, listening to the silence around them. It was almost eerie how quiet it was here. It made his inner thoughts that much louder. He clenched his fists, trying to silence the thousands of thoughts all vying for his attention. It felt like static, white noise in his brain.

“Not like that kid.” Cayde’s low drawl drew his attention and he opened his eyes to meet the Exo’s glowing blue gaze again. “You’re fighting the thoughts, trying to squander them.”

“I thought that was the point, to silence the noise? Isn’t that why we left Theive’s Landing?”

“No…let’s start again.”

“Cayde—”

“Just be quiet and listen. Listen for one thought, one thing and focus on that. Let all the others just…pass through you.”

“How do I know which one to focus on?” He asked quietly, averting his eyes back to the sky above them. “There’s just…there’s so many.”

“Let’s start with the loudest.”

“Who am I?” Crow muttered, mostly to himself. That was the one thought—the one constant that rose above everything else. He took another slow deep breath, in…hold...then out. Just like Glint had taught him. 

He caught the scent of the incense just then, it was a subtle sweet smell that slowly drifted its way to him, enveloping him in quiet familiarity. He knew this scent. Jasmine. This time when he shut his eyes, the rest of the noise inside his brain simply faded into the background. 

He was somewhere else now. Lost in miles and miles of blue. That same shade that had been tugging at the edges of his dreams. It was everywhere, all around him. 

In his hands, he held a Hand Cannon, its weight both foreign and comforting all at once. His fingers curled around its handle, and the texture of worn leather met his touch like it had always been there. The Ace of Spades symbol etched into the barrel stuck out like a beacon, searing its image into his mind.

It meant one thing, could only ever mean one thing: Death.

A chill ran through him as the realization hit. This wasn’t just a weapon. It was a legacy, and it wasn’t his. He felt the weight of it—not just in his hands but on his soul, a crushing reminder of something lost, something stolen. Then a low voice whispered through his thoughts, unbidden but insistent, like a specter lingering along the edges of his consciousness: Cayde.

“Stay in this moment, right here with me.”

Crow blinked hard, trying to focus, but the words remained, wrapping around his mind like a noose. This place, this moment, felt like a memory that wasn’t his own. He could sense it—grief, anger, and something deeper, something ragged and raw. They weren’t his emotions, yet they coursed through him all the same.

“Sometimes a star is just a star…”

Crow whipped around for the source of the words, they came unbidden and honest. Speaking with such sincerity they sent warmth throughout his entire being. Every nerve, every vein lit up from the inside out. Solar Light licked along his clothing, surrounding him.

Yet he felt no pain. Only a singular presence, one embedded in his soul. Etched somewhere in the recesses of his memory. 

“Between now and then…you can trust me.” 

He raised the weapon he was holding, firing off three perfect shots into the sea of blue. Their fiery orange trail rippled through it, splitting it like the sea. When it faded away, the weapon crumbled to ash in his palm, as if that were all it had left to give. 

He came back into himself with a sharp, sudden gasp, reality rushing into him all too quickly. 

“Easy there,” Cayde’s hand was on his shoulder, grounding him in the here and now once more. Crow made the mistake of meeting his eyes, his heart hammering wildly in his chest when he realized how close they were.

“I-I have to go.” he tore himself from the other man, pulling his hood back into place quickly to hide the way his face was flushed. 

“We just got started.”

“It's fine…w-we’ll pick it up another time.” Then he fast-traveled out of there as quickly as he could.

****

“No….this isn’t right either,” Crow mumbled to himself, stepping back to look at the wall in front of him. His Ghost hovered nearby as they inspected the multiple paint swatches he’d made on the wall—all variations of blue. They were inside his ‘nest’ as he’d called it. A place away from Spider’s prying eyes.

It wasn’t glamorous by any means. In fact, it was little more than an old bunker half rotted away with remnants of the Hive he’d cleared out of the place. There was an old bed in one corner, an empty bottle of alcohol he’d retrieved when a kind wayward Warlock had once offered him a drink, a bowl—broken and mended with gold from an age long gone, and finally, the shroud he’d woken up under.

A beautiful silken thing, his first memories were of that shroud. The first thing that was… his. He hadn’t the heart to throw it away, after all, someone had taken great care to lay him to rest in it. 

“Maybe try adding some green?” Glint offered, pulling Crow out of his thoughts in that gentle way only he knew how. 

“Green…” Crow mulled this over as he rubbed his paint-stained index finger and thumb together. He took the brush into his hand again and carefully dipped just the edge of it into the green paint, blending it with a lighter blue he’d made earlier.

“Now white,” Glint said softly as he nestled himself onto Crow’s shoulder. Crow let himself get lost in the task, not wanting to dwell on anything else for the moment. He mixed in the white, slowly—carefully.

Now was the moment of truth.

He set the brush aside and dipped his fingers into the new shade he’d just concocted with the help of his Ghost. Then he raised his hand and smeared it onto the wall.

“That’s it…” He almost whispered the words. “That’s the color I’ve been seeing in my dreams. The one I saw in my…vision.”

“Interesting…” Glint floated over to it, his shell spinning around his circular body in contemplation. “It’s the same color as Cayde’s eyes…”

“What? No…that’s ridiculous.” He edged nearer, taking careful guarded steps. As if seeing it for himself would reveal some truth he wasn’t quite ready for. 

Even he could not deny what was clear as day in front of him. 

The shade was an exact match.

“He knows me… from before,” he blurted out, each word heavy with uncertainty, his voice cracking under the weight of his discovery.  “Or maybe I knew him.”

Glint hovered nearby, his light pulsing softly in an attempt to ground his Guardian. “Crow, are you sure? The chances are—"

“I’m positive, Glint,” Crow interrupted, his hands clenching into fists at his sides as though bracing himself for something unseen. “Cayde knows me. I mean…he knows who I was.” He swallowed hard, his throat dry. 

He wasn’t sure if he should feel excitement or terror. It was a mess of both, twisting together in his gut like sickened vines wrapping around his insides. “The way he looks at me...” Crow’s voice trailed off, hollow now. “It’s not hate or mistrust, Glint…I can’t describe it.”

Glint floated a little closer, his shell now moving in a calming but curious manner. “If he does know, he wasn’t exactly forthcoming when we were in the Lost Sectors. You asked him outright, and he deflected. That’s not the behavior of someone eager to share.”

Crow turned to his Ghost, eyes wide with a raw intensity. “That’s exactly why I’m sure. Cayde is hiding something. It feels big, Glint. He could be the key to understanding…everything.”

Glint’s eye dimmed slightly considering the weight of Crow’s words. “Then you’ll have to earn his trust,” Glint said, his tone thoughtful yet cautious. “He’s not going to tell you otherwise, Crow. And even if you do earn that trust…” The Ghost paused, doubt slipping into his tone. “I have a feeling you might not like the answers he gives you.”

Crow looked down at his hands, suddenly feeling how foreign they still were to him. His pulse thrummed in his ears, and every muscle tensed. He hadn’t even thought of that—the possibility that knowing his past might be worse than staying in the dark. The possibility that Cayde might hold all the pieces but unwilling to share any of them.

“I don’t have a choice, I need to know what this means…what I was to him…even if it destroys me.”

****

Crow stood outside Spider’s hideout a few days later, determined to face whatever this was between himself and Cayde head-on. He heard the rumble of a Pike approaching, the engine’s low growl vibrating through him as Cayde pulled up to him. 

He kept his arms folded, his usual composure breaking just slightly as Cayde slowed to a stop. A flush bloomed across his cheeks at the sight. This was going to be more complicated than he thought.

"Well, well," Cayde drawled, leaning forward slightly on the vehicle his body stretched out as he tilted his head at Crow. "You just going to stand there and gawk, or are we going to have some fun today?"

Crow blinked, shaking himself out of whatever daze had hit him. His brows furrowed as he stared at Cayde, clearly trying to school his expression. "Cayde," he said, his voice steady but betraying a hint of fluster. "What exactly do you think you're doing?"

Cayde chuckled, tapping the handlebars playfully. "Oh, you know, just showing off a bit. Thought I'd take you for a spin. C’mon, let’s go for a ride."

He raised a brow, taking a step back as if the Pike was something dangerous that might bite him. "Are you crazy? I’m not getting on that thing."

"Crazy?" Cayde leaned back, feigning offense as he spread his arms wide. "This beauty? She's as safe as they come—well, relatively speaking. Besides, what’s the point of being a Guardian if you can’t live a little?"

Crow hesitated, though a flicker of curiosity managed its way through. "Look, I promise I won’t go fast," He said with a smile. "Well…I won’t go faster than I normally do."

Crow snorted. "That’s supposed to be reassuring?"

"Absolutely!" He leaned forward again, revving the Pike just a bit to emphasize the point, the engine rumbling louder. "You trust me, don’t you?"

Crow gave him a long, measured look. For a moment, he considered refusing and telling Cayde just where he could shove that cavalier attitude of his. But with a sigh of resignation, Crow stepped forward. "I must be out of my mind," he muttered under his breath, more to himself than to Cayde.

"That’s the spirit!" Cayde cheered as Crow gingerly climbed onto the back of the Pike. Crow settled his arms around the other male, close enough that Cayde’s scent invaded his senses. Gunpowder, metal, and…cedar maybe? It was almost drugging in its own right. He shook his head, trying desperately to remain focused on the task at hand.

"Ready?" He asked, looking over his shoulder at Crow.

"Just don’t kill us," Crow replied, tightening his grip.

With a wide grin, Cayde revved the engine once more and took off, the Pike shooting forward with a burst of speed. Crow tensed behind him, but he kept the pace playful, leaning into the turns with just enough daring to keep things interesting.

Crow’s grip tightened even more as they sped across the rocky landscape of the Reef. The adrenaline began to race its way through his veins and his breathing gave way to something lighter, almost unguarded—a feeling he hadn’t experienced since being brought back. Joy.

He found himself relishing this moment far too much even as Cayde swerved and dodged around obstacles, the wind rushing past them, Crow slowly relaxing bit by bit behind him.

As they soared over a rise, Cayde shouted over the roar of the engine. "See? You’re loving this!"

Crow didn’t respond, but he could feel the shift—the tension was gone, replaced with exhilaration. 

"Alright, Cayde, I get it," Crow called out, his voice laced with amusement. "You’ve made your point!"

"Not quite," Cayde teased, veering them toward a narrow canyon. Crow’s heart beat picked up the pace as the walls started to close in around them, beating in his ears like a war drum. 

"Cayde!" Crow’s shout was half-warning, half-laughter as Cayde expertly maneuvered the Pike through the tight space. They burst out on the other side of the canyon, the wide-open horizon stretching before them, and Cayde slowed down, the thrill of the ride still pulsing through his veins.

Finally, he eased the Pike to a stop, allowing Crow to release his grip slowly, though the lingering warmth around his waist remained. Cayde glanced back at him with a satisfied grin.

"Well?" He asked, clearly fishing for praise.

"Yeah alright, you win. Aside from the near-death experience, it was…fun."

"I knew you'd come around. Crow, I'd like to formally introduce you to Wildcard. She's going to help us take down Yaviks."

"Us?" Crow asked as he slid off the vehicle, he was a bit shaky but found his footing quickly.

"You're running point with me, remember? Yaviks is going to pull out all the stops to keep herself ahead of the game, and while this Pike here is outfitted with her own tricks, I need someone who can watch my back out there. You game?"

Crow wavered again, shifting his stance from one foot to the other. "Not sure how this is supposed to teach me to be a better Hunter."

"Hunters need to think on their feet. One moment of uncertainty could mean life or death out there. You need to learn how to make those kinds of decisions in a heartbeat, Crow. But to get you there, you have to learn to trust yourself first. What better way to do that than a high-speed Pike race?"

“So, how does this work then?”

“I’ve got the race track all mapped out,” He slid off the Pike and held out his hand for Sundance to appear. “Oh, this is Sundance by the way. Sundance, Crow.”

“Right,” Crow made a motion with his own hand and his Ghost appeared next to him.

“Glint, at your service. It’s an honor to meet you, Cayde-6! Why I never thought I’d see the day! We all thought you were dead!”

“Pleasure’s all mine.”

“Now that introductions are out of the way, can we get on with the mission?” Sundance asked softly.

“Go on and show us the track,” Cayde said. She created a 3-D holographic image of the track, which sprawled over several areas of The Tangled Shore. “It starts here in Theive’s Landing, and cuts through Four-Horn Gulch. There's a load of acid pits there…then we take a sharp turn through a tunnel that leads into Sorik’s Cut where we’ll find Cabal, including explosives we might be able to use. Finally, we go through this path and that’ll put us right out at the finish line in the Jetsam of Saturn.”

“That’s a lot of ground to cover out there, Cayde.”

“Which is why I need you. I’m going to have you set up four vantage points, one in each location. You’ll need to get to each one before I do, so your timing has to be perfect—”

“It has to be better than perfect to pull that off.” Uncertainty crept into Crow’s tone again, his arms crossed as he tapped a finger against his bicep.

“Look, I know things haven’t been easy for you Crow. They’re probably going to get worse. But doubting yourself, your capabilities… it's just going to get you hurt. I need someone to watch my six, and I’m counting on you to do that.”

“Because you have no other choice.” The sharpness in Crow’s tone slipped out before he could even stop himself, his gaze hardening. 

“I could call in the Vanguard any time I want, you know that as well as I do.” Cayde countered as he turned away from the other man, his hands on his hips. “Look…I don’t know if it means anything coming from me. But I’m sorry for what those Guardians did to you. It should have never happened.” 

Silence hung heavily between them before Crow spoke again. “It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have pinned that on you.” After another pause, he added. “Old habits die hard.”

Crow looked back over to him, the hurt ebbing away when he saw Cayde’s face. It was almost infuriating how handsome he was—it stripped away all of Crow’s defenses in a heartbeat. It was as if Cayde’s presence alone peeled away every layer of his guard, leaving him exposed and vulnerable, no matter how hard he tried to resist it. In a single breath, the bitterness dissolved, replaced by something far more dangerous—an ache he couldn’t quite name.

“You can pin anything you want on me, Crow. But it ain’t gonna fix how you feel inside. That work is on you and you alone. There’s not a soul in this galaxy who can do it for you. I’m here, willing to help in any way that I can. So the way I see it, a man’s got two choices: You can accept it, or you can walk away.”

“How do I accept your help without questioning your motives?”

“You trust your instincts,” Cayde said softly as he walked back over to his Pike and straddled it once more. “After all, that’s what separates a Hunter from the rest.” He gazed at Crow again from his place on the Pike. “You have some time to think about it and either you’ll be there when I need you to be or…well, I suspect you’ll figure it out.” Without another word, Cayde sped off.

****

Cayde

As Cayde rolled up to the starting point of the race a few hours later, anxiety twisted deep in the pit of his gut. He was not generally an anxious person, but he hadn't heard a peep from Crow since their discussion after the joyride on his Pike. He was beginning to wonder if he’d pressed too hard, too soon. 

Maybe he was asking for something that the other male wasn’t ready to give. 

It wasn’t like he had expected Crow to just trust him overnight, but he thought he’d made some kind of progress after their toast in the bar. He took a deep breath as more riders, several of Yaviks’ cronies no doubt, pulled into their starting places beside him. The rumble of the other Pikes and his own making the ground tremble and the air thicken with exhaust. They cackled and taunted him in Eliksni until the light at the starting line began to blink in a familiar sequence. 

Red. Red. Red. 

GREEN.

Cayde punched the throttle surging his Pike forward and speeding ahead of the other racers kicking up dust and rocks in his wake. It was a good start, no doubt about that but he knew he needed to stay ahead of them if he had any chance of winning this thing. 

No sign of Yaviks yet, but she would show herself sooner or later. Cayde sped around Theive’s Landing, narrowly missing some poor sod pulling along a cart of Cabal Redfruit. The guy behind him however hit the fruit stand head-on.

He glanced back briefly just in time to see fruit flying in every direction. A chuckle left him as he turned his attention back to the track, the turn was coming up quick and Cayde’s anxiety surfaced again. That was the first vantage point, if Crow didn’t show there…well he didn’t want to think about that.

Cayde whipped into the turn, drifting the Pike with his body just inches from the ground, leaning every ounce of his weight into the curve. As he came around the bend, he righted himself as an arc shot hit the ground mere inches from his pike—Vandals. He narrowly avoided a few more blasts from their weapons. Then as quickly as he’d seen them, he watched them fall in rapid succession, each taken out by a precise headshot.

“Didn’t really think I’d leave you to fend for yourself, did you?” Crow’s voice cut through the chaos when it came through Sundance’s comm, steady and confident. 

“I’ll admit, you had me goin’ there.” He nearly let out a laugh of relief.

“Well, someone has to make sure you don’t kill yourself out there. Might as well be me,” Crow’s voice crackled through the comms, his usual broody tone undercut by a trace of humor. “You’ll be approaching the acid pits soon. Heading to the next vantage point.”

The transmission cut off with the familiar click and Cayde hit the throttle hard, the roar of the Pike filling the air as he tore through Four-Horn Gulch. The first pit bubbled dangerously as he skirted past it.

One of the racers behind him wasn’t so lucky and went careening into the pit with a sickening splash. The sharp stench of acid filled the air as the racer's Pike dissolved almost instantly, its frame hissing and warping in the corrosive pool.

Cayde deftly maneuvered around it, but the other racers weren’t giving him any room to breathe. One of them was trying to force Cayde off course, their Pikes locked in a dangerous game of chicken as they sped alongside each other. Cayde shoved back, but before he could make a move, Crow’s voice came through the comm again.

“Racers flanking from both sides.”

“Yep, I noticed.” He said through a growl. “Were you taking a nap up there?”

“So my timing wasn’t exactly perfect. You can lecture me about it later.”

“Yeah, we’re definitely working on that.” Cayde agreed as he swerved around another acid pit, still pitted by the other racers. “I’ve got somethin’ risky.”

Crow’s scoff came through the comm, the sound of gunfire from his weapon punctuating his question. “And that’s different from any other day because…?”

“This thing is equipped with a cloaking mechanism. You won’t be able to see me for about ten seconds but I’ve got to get these guys off my ass or I’m going to end up taking an acid bath.”

“There’s a road to the left you can take, I’ve already cleared it for you. Moving to the next vantage point.”

Cayde engaged the mechanism and punched the throttle on the Pike for all she was worth, finally managing to break free of the other racers. He tore through the path, drifting around the corners and maneuvering the Pike as if it were an extension of his body. By the time the cloaking timer expired, he was entering Sorik's Cut, a large area surrounded by Cabal infrastructure.

And lots of things that could explode upon impact. 

“Now it’s my turn for something risky,” Crow said, sounding a little more playful than Cayde had grown accustomed to.

“Glad you could make it on time, what’s the play?”

“You see those barrels the Cabal were so nice to leave lying around? We could use them to our advantage.”

“I’m with you so far.”

“Just…stay ahead of them.”  That was the only warning he got from Crow before the ground behind him erupted with a thunderous boom. The force of the explosion surged his Pike forward, the blastwave rattling his body. He barely managed to maintain control of his vehicle and gravel and debris pinged off his armor, the heat from the explosion licking at his back.

“Are you out of your mind?!” Cayde shouted, half-laughing, half-grimacing. He wasn’t sure if he was angry, impressed, or possibly…a little turned on by Crow’s recklessness. It was all part of the thrill, right?

Crow’s came back on the comm, tone as cool as ever. “Better hurry, Cayde. I’ve got my scope on another barrel, and you’re coming up on it any second now.”

Cayde cursed under his breath and leaned harder into his Pike, the engines whining in protest as he sped toward the next barrel which was dead ahead. It was nestled along the edge of a narrow cliffside path. The racers were gaining on him again, but there was no time to look back. He had to trust Crow’s timing, which was not as impeccable as he would have liked.

Cayde veered sharply to the left, narrowly skirting past the barrel just as it burst apart. The shockwave punched him forward again. He gripped the handles tightly, fighting to stay balanced as his Pike flew down the rocky stretch of terrain.

“Geez, Crow, you trying to help me or kill me?” Cayde grumbled into the comm, though he was more amused than annoyed.

Crow’s reply held the faintest hint of a smirk. “Depends. Are you still breathing?”

“Barely,” Cayde shot back. “Though if you keep pulling stunts like that, I might have to reconsider letting you run point.”

“You’re welcome,” Crow retorted, his voice steady despite the chaos around them.

Cayde shook his head, all the while grinning like a maniac as the adrenaline pumped through him. It wasn’t the first time someone had tried to blow him up, and it likely would be far from the last. But he couldn’t remember a time he’d enjoyed it this much since before losing Uldren.

The final stretch of the race stretched out before Cayde like a death trap. His pulse thrummed in his ears, his Pike roaring beneath him. Sure enough, just as he rounded the last bend Yaviks tore out in front of him, she swerved violently, slamming her Pike into the side of his with brutal force. 

The impact jolted through him, nearly sending him barreling off course. He struggled to keep his balance, his Pike wobbled dangerously close to the cliff’s edge. His foot shot out, kicking against her Pike to shove her back.

“You’re cutting it close, Cayde…keep your Pike in one piece, will you?” He barely heard Crow over the sound of his cardiac drive thundering in his chest.

“Hey, I’ll have you know I’ve got everything under control here,” Cayde shot back, eyes locked on Yaviks as she tried to pull ahead again. “Just trying not to get killed by a Scorn psychopath. No big deal.”

She slammed into him again, harder this time, sending his Pike skidding dangerously close to the cliff's edge. He growled, battling to keep it from going over. The edge loomed closer. One more hit and he'd be plummeting into the ravine below.

At the last second, Cayde threw his weight to the left, yanking the handlebars as hard as he could. His Pike spun out, drifting dangerously close to the drop-off, but it held. For a single heart-stopping moment, he was suspended on the edge, the tail end of his Pike sticking over it. Then he managed to shoot back onto the track, righting himself just as Yaviks sped up ahead, her Pike spitting fire from its exhaust.

She unleashed a torrent of flames, and Cayde saw the heat shimmer in the air just before it reached him. He veered to the right, narrowly avoiding the fiery blast, the heat licking at his sides. 

Cayde pressed forward, ducking and weaving as Yaviks continued her relentless assault of fire.  His fingers itched toward a switch under the dashboard—a trigger for the hidden compartment he’d rigged up earlier that held a large number of explosive mines.

He waited until they were neck and neck again. Yaviks was close—too close. She’d clearly had enough of him dodging her flames and was ready to finish this. Good. That was exactly what he wanted.

Cayde swerved just as she prepared to ram him again, forcing her Pike off balance for just a second. He took advantage of the opening, dropping back behind her as her machine spat another burst of fire. With a quick flick of his wrist, he hit the switch and released the mines from the hidden compartment under his Pike.

They scattered across the track, small, inconspicuous, and deadly.

Her Pike roared forward, hitting the first mine dead on the explosion causing the rear end to lift slightly off the ground. Cayde didn’t give her a chance to recover. He hit the throttle, rocketing past her just as another mine detonated.

The blast sent her skidding wildly across the track, the flames sputtering out as she lost control. Yaviks fought to regain her balance, snarling in rage as her machine fishtailed towards the cliff’s edge. She teetered for a moment—and then the Pike flipped, tumbling over the edge.

Cayde didn’t stick around to watch her fall. The finish line was in sight, the wind whipping past him. He could still feel the adrenaline surging through him, his mind buzzing with the danger he’d just escaped. But for the first time in a while, he felt alive. Fully alive.

****

That evening he and Crow sat atop his hollowed-out skiff, the sky painted in pastel tones of pink and purple, even a little orange managed to slip into the view.

“Do you know anything about your past life?” Crow asked.

Cayde looked up at the stars as he thought about his answer.“Some. I was a soldier. Not sure what war I fought in or anything like that. I was also an outlaw, real gunslinger type. That last part hasn’t changed much. What about you kid?”

“Some,” Crow answered hesitantly. “I know the name of the man that used to wear my face. I also know he was a terrible person who did…even more terrible things. What those things were I…I haven’t been able to bring myself to find out.”

“He may have done bad things, not so sure he was a bad guy.”

“How can one exist without the other? Doesn’t a person’s actions sum up their character?”

“Maybe,” Cayde shrugged. “But look at me. I wasn’t always the Hunter Vanguard. We all have things that motivate us to do what we do.” 

“So what motivates the great Cayde-6?” Crow asked, eyeing him under his hood.

“Ramen.”

“I’m being serious, Cayde.”

“So am I! A good bowl of ramen…Like I mean a damn good bowl—hell I might be tempted to end the galaxy right now.” Cayde leaned back on his hands letting silence pass between them for a few seconds before he spoke again.“You want the real answer?”

Crow nodded silently, so Cayde continued. “Love. Love motivates me. I would burn the cosmos asunder for the people I care about. Light, Darkness…I’d waltz the line between them so long as it meant keeping them safe.”

“You’re not concerned about the moral implications?”

“Not one damn bit.”

Chapter Text

Cayde

“You and I both know this has nothing to do with ridding the Reef of the barons.” Sundance circled around and got right in front of him. “Are you sure it’s a good idea for you to be around Crow so soon after—”

“We agreed on exposure therapy, remember? I spend enough time around him and…and then maybe I can come to terms with losing…” he trailed off with a heavy sigh, it felt like a long shot. But at the moment it was his only option aside from tucking tail and returning to the Tower to leave Crow to fend for himself. And Cayde just couldn’t bring himself to do that.

“You want to save him.” She said lowly. “What if this is the past repeating itself?”

“No, I refuse to believe that,” he replied, his voice hardening with conviction. “The Traveler chooses us, right? The ones who are devoted, who are brave…who sacrifice. We’re the ones that die and become Guardians. Maybe I wasn’t the only one who saw those qualities in Uldren.”

Saying the Prince’s name out loud still felt like a blade slipping between his steel ribs. His breath hitched, but he pushed through. “The Traveler saw them too. Maybe this time, he doesn’t need saving. He just…needs someone who doesn’t look at him like he’s a murderer.”

Sundance was quiet for a moment, her light flickering gently. Then she sighed. “You decided this the moment you saw him.”

Cayde glanced away, his eyes settling on the vastness of the Reef as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah. Maybe I did.”

She drifted closer, her tone gentle but firm. “It’s going to hurt, Cayde. Physically. Emotionally. In every way that matters. I just want you to be sure before you go down this road.”

He met her gaze, his usual bravado stripped away, replaced with his unyielding stubbornness.

“As long as I have you with me,” he said, voice softer now, “what could go wrong?”

****

A low tune played from an old radio inside Cayde’s skiff, it carried along the breeze and drifted out to the patio. It was some old song with the twang of an acoustic guitar that matched the quiet sway of their movements. The little porch creaked under their weight, boots scuffing lightly against the worn wood. 

Cayde had framed this as a lesson—just a bit of footwork training, something that would make Crow a better Hunter. But right now, with the stars hanging high and the cool Reef air wrapping around them, it didn’t feel like training at all.

It felt like something else entirely.

“You really are a Wildcard,” Crow murmured, his voice low, hesitant.

“Told ya.” Cayde smiled soft and warm, though his usual confidence wavered. It was too easy, the way they moved together. Too natural. Like slipping into an old routine he hadn’t realized he remembered.

Crow followed his lead well—as if it were ingrained in some part of his being too. Cayde couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment when things shifted. When it changed from an innocent lesson about footwork to being charged with something unsaid. Crow’s fingers tightened just a bit more around his bicep, his gold eyes locked onto Cayde’s. 

Then, before Cayde even realized it was happening, their bodies were barely an inch apart. Their faces so close they shared the same breath.

Close enough that Crow’s warm breath ghosted against his lips. Close enough that Cayde nearly forgot himself.

His cardiac drive lurched in his chest.

Shit.

“Y-you know what, I forgot about the ramen water…” Cayde blurted out, breaking away so fast he nearly tripped over his own feet.

He spun on his heel and strode back into the skiff, his cardiac drive thundering under his steel ribcage. Inside, he paced, his hands clenching and unclenching restlessly at his sides before he caught himself against the workbench, gripping the edges.

Traveler, help him.

What was he doing?

This wasn’t fair. Crow didn’t know. He still had no idea what they had been, what had happened between them. And here Cayde was, taking advantage of that—not intentionally, but hell, what did intent matter when his body still remembered stolen touches and too-long glances?

The sound of the back door creaking open made him tense. He turned just in time to see Crow step inside, his brow furrowed, confusion clear on his face.

“Did I do something wrong?”

The question twisted into Cayde like a well-placed dagger.

“No…” His voice came out quieter than he meant it to. “No, it was me, Crow. It’s not a good time for me right now.”

Crow’s expression flickered—something unreadable passing over his face before he masked it with neutrality. “Oh.”

Just one word, but somehow it made the space between them feel impossibly wide, like a great unbridgeable chasm neither of them could cross.

“I should go then,” Crow said after a beat, his voice steady, but his shoulders a little too stiff. “I have work to do for Spider. Thanks, Cayde. For the lesson.”

Cayde forced himself to nod, to play the part so to speak. “Yeah. Anytime, kid. See you out there.”

He turned away before he had to watch Crow leave, hands gripping the workbench again as the sound of retreating footsteps faded into the night.

What the hell was he doing?

****

"Look, you say you're sorry I'll say I'm…not sorry. Then we'll shake hands and be done with it."

"I don’t feel guilty for killing you."

"Not exactly direction I was going in—wait you don’t feel bad for killing me? That’s harsh.”

“You would have done the same. I simply outdrew you.”

Cayde sighed as he ran his hand along his Hunter’s hood, he was sitting by himself in the same bar he and Crow had made their toast in not so long ago lamenting about the past while also trying to find a way forward. Things were getting…complicated to say the least. He was trying his best to move on and accept that this was the way things were meant to be. 

He had never put too much stock into pre-ordained fate, even after Riven had shown him his own death. Even when she made it clear that this future, the one he currently found himself in, was the only one in which he made it out of that Traveler-forsaken prison alive. Not even when she had made it so very crystal clear that Uldren had one purpose, her freedom, and nothing more. 

Some vain part of him thought he could change fate itself. That he would make it right—somehow. He ran his index finger around the glass of alcohol, it was barely even touched, more for comfort than actual consumption. Something to give himself to do instead of rehashing things. Yet, here he was doing exactly that.

They had been making decent progress on the Barons, and Crow’s skills were improving with each mission. He moved like a true Hunter whenever they were out together. And he’d even purchased better boots, he was damn near silent now. In those moments, Cayde would catch glimpses of Uldren in the cracks. 

He’d see the Prince in the way Crow moved, in the way his gaze would harden when he got focused on a target, how he gritted his teeth when he was in the heat of a firefight. And then it would fade away, gone as quickly as it had come, and leave only Crow in its wake.

Crow—who was still unsure of his own skills. Crow—who was still wary of Cayde’s presence here in the Tangled Shore. Crow—who had been killed time and time again by other Guardians and yet was trying his damnedest to work with Cayde.

When had this all become so damn complicated?  

How could he reconcile his grief when it was staring him in the face every time he looked at Crow? And at the same time, something was still pulling him, tugging him the same way it had with Uldren. This inexplicable gravity that he still didn’t understand. 

Perhaps they truly were two black holes, one destined to annihilate the other in an endless vicious cycle for all of time. It made him begin to wonder if his being here would seal Crow’s fate the same way he’d sealed Uldren’s. And going through that experience once was enough for Cayde.

He would not— could not allow the past to repeat itself. The guilt of keeping all of this to himself was beginning to eat away at him. Like a corrosive acid, he felt it stirring in the pit of his gut. 

How much longer could he even hold onto all of it at this rate?  

****

Crow

“You must turn him over to the Queen, Cayde.” The Awoken woman’s voice was steady, but there was an unmistakable edge beneath it—authority laced with respect. Respect for Cayde.

Crow knew he shouldn’t have followed Cayde, but his curiosity was really starting to outweigh his better judgment. 

“No. Absolutely not.”

Petra sighed, her hands planted firmly on her hips. “He’s her bro—”

“He’s not hers anymore.” Cayde cut her off, his voice dropping lower, carrying a weight that made the air between them thick with unspoken history. His jaw tightened as he took a step forward, shadows from the neon glow of the Tangled Shore casting sharp lines across his face. “He needs to walk his own path, Petra.”

Petra. The name struck a chord somewhere inside Crow’s mind. The way she held herself, he sharp one-eyed gaze singularly focused on the Hunter. It felt…familiar.

Her eyes searched Cayde’s, her stance unwavering. “Oh, is that what you’re doing out here in the Tangled Shore? Because it looked to me like you were playing the part of renegade again.”

Cayde let out a short, dry laugh. “Yeah, well. Some habits die harder than others.” He crossed his arms, shifting his weight. “I’m trying to get him away from Spider. Earning trust from a guy like that takes time.”

There was a long silence. A battle of wills in the stillness of the outpost. Finally, Petra spoke again, quieter this time. “You want to take him to the Tower.” A statement, not a question. “You and I both know what’s waiting for him there.”

Cayde sighed as he ran a hand over his face before dropping it to his side. “I’ve got things in motion. What I don’t seem to have is time.” His voice lowered, rough around the edges with something dangerously close to desperation. “Could you give me more time? Please?”

Her gaze softened for just a fraction of a second—so brief that Crow nearly missed it. She let out a breath and crossed her arms again.

“Fine. But I’m telling her he’s alive.”

Cayde nodded, but the tension in his shoulders didn’t ease. “You can tell her whatever you want about him. Just don’t breathe a word about me.”

Petra tilted her head, a faint smile playing on her lips. “About who?” There was a hint of amusement in her tone as she turned on her heel and walked away, disappearing into the vastness of the Reef.

From his hiding spot in the shadows, Crow remained perfectly still, watching as Cayde let out a long, slow exhale. The Hunter’s hands drifted to his face, fingers pressing into his temples as if trying to steel himself.

Then, in a voice barely above a whisper, he muttered, “What the hell have you gotten yourself into this time, Cayde?”

Cayde was protecting him. Against Spider…against this woman and whoever she worked for. Against all of Sol itself.

And Crow didn’t know whether that made him feel relieved—or terrified.

****

A few nights later, they were camped out inside one of the many cave systems that ran through the tangled shore. There was a crackling campfire between himself and Cayde, the cracks and pops from the burning wood filling the heavy silence. They were on the trail of another Scorn Baron, The Rifleman. Turns out he was a slippery bastard and had managed to escape them a few times already.

So here they were, in each other’s presence once again. 

It was now or never, Crow had decided. He needed to hear the truth from Cayde. He needed something tangible. 

“You knew him.” His voice was barely above a whisper, sounding fragile, breakable.

“Knew who, kid?” Cayde responded, his attention ostensibly fixated on the fire. He poked at the burning logs with a stick, little embers spiraling upward into the dark sky. The act felt too casual, almost like he was deflecting.

“Don’t play dumb, Cayde. You know exactly who I’m talking about.”

Cayde went still, and the air between them grew heavy with the weight of unspoken words. Slowly, deliberately, he turned to look at Crow, his glowing blue eyes catching the firelight, honing his sharp gaze into a knife that sliced into Crow with deadly precision. 

“Then say his name,” Cayde replied, his voice low and almost dangerous.

Crow’s heart felt like it was caught in a vice. This wasn’t how he’d imagined this conversation playing out in his head. It was supposed to be Cayde fumbling for an explanation. Not him. But now, under the dim light of the fire, Crow felt it rise up like bile in his throat.

“Uldren Sov.”

The name landed between them like a physical blow, reverberating in the stillness that followed. It was like dropping a stone into a motionless pond, the ripples radiating outward. Cayde went silent, but the way his jaw tightened, the way his eyes drifted away from Crow’s as if looking at him any longer was too painful, said more than words ever could.

After what felt like an eternity, Crow spoke again. His voice was quieter now, trembling under the weight of his own frustration. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Cayde sighed, a long, weary sound that seemed to carry the weight of years. His gaze finally broke from the fire. “Because…it didn’t matter.”

“It didn’t matter?” Crow’s breath hitched. “My life… my past…didn’t matter? Guardians have been hunting me down, killing me on sight because of who I used to be. Because of things I don’t even remember doing!” He could feel the anger rising, clenching his fists in some desperate attempt to keep it from boiling over. “But that doesn’t matter?”

Cayde’s expression hardened, though there was something behind his eyes—something guarded and painful. “It ain’t your past anymore,” he said lowly. “It’s his. And you need to let it go. I have.”

“The hell you have,” Crow shot back, taking a step closer, his voice thick with rage and pain. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? That’s why you found me in the Tangled Shore. Because you were looking for someone else. Has anything you’ve told me been true? Anything at all?”

The light of the flames flickered across Cayde’s face, casting his features into a sharp contrast. 

“I never lied to you, Crow,” he finally said, his voice quieter now. “Not once.”

Crow laughed bitterly, the sound hollow in his throat. “No, Cayde. You did something so much worse. You omitted everything.” His voice cracked on the last word, the raw emotion finally spilling out. “You kept me in the dark.”

It was too much to bear—the crackling campfire, the weight of Cayde’s steady gaze, and the truth that had been unraveling ever since the moment they first drew weapons on each other. He stood up and stalked off into the night, feeling some small sense of relief when Cayde didn’t try to stop him.

The shadows swallowed him up, but the words kept replaying in his head, haunting him. You need to let it go. I have.

But Crow knew the truth. Neither of them had let anything go. And they both knew it. 

He pressed his back against a large boulder, needing something solid. Something rooted in the earth to steady the chaos in his mind and in his body. Crow let out a shaky breath, staring out at the dark horizon. 

A long, quiet moment passed, the Reef was almost entirely silent save for the rustle of the breeze now and then. He stood there for what felt like forever, his mind still racing. But after a while, his body grew still, the anger that had surged through him earlier now drained, leaving only an empty ache behind.

He had thought putting some distance between them would help clear his head, but all he could think about was that name—Uldren Sov.

Footsteps broke through his thoughts. Crow didn’t bother looking to see if it was Cayde, he already knew.

“You always run off when things get too deep?” Cayde’s voice was light and casual, but there was tension underneath it like he wasn’t quite sure how close he should get before things spiraled out of control again.

Crow didn’t answer right away. He could hear Cayde’s approach slowing, then stopping a few feet away, giving him space. It was strange, seeing a bold Hunter like Cayde act so…apprehensive. It only made the ache in Crow’s chest worse.

“I needed to think,” Crow finally said, his voice low. “Figure out what to do with all…this.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Cayde replied, his tone softer than usual. He shifted his weight but didn’t move any closer. “I’m not exactly the best when it comes to…you know, the heavy stuff.”

Silence stretched between them again, the only sound the distant hum of the night. Crow was the first to break it this time, his voice quieter, more measured. “Why didn’t you just tell me, Cayde? From the beginning?”

The other Hunter sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as if the question itself was physically weighing him down. “You were doing good, kid. You were supposed to get a clean slate, you don’t need the ghost of Uldren Sov hanging over you, dragging you back into something you don’t remember.”

Crow frowned, turning fully to face Cayde now. “But it’s my past. I had a right to know. Instead, I’ve been walking around blind.”

Cayde’s shoulders slumped, and for a moment, the sharp-tongued Hunter seemed to age before his eyes. His confident swagger was nowhere to be found, replaced by a heavier feeling. “You’re right. I should’ve told you. But…it’s not like it would’ve made it easier for you.”

Crow’s jaw tightened. “Maybe. But at least it would’ve been honest.”

Cayde nodded, taking a deep breath. “I can’t change what I did. But I wasn’t lying when I said it didn’t matter to me. Uldren—he’s not you, Crow. You’re not him. And yeah, some Guardians, they can’t see you yet,” His glowing eyes met Crow’s again, earnest now. “But I do.”

Crow let out a slow breath, his frustration tempered by the honesty in Cayde’s words. The bitterness still lingered, but another emotion filtered its way past it—understanding, maybe. 

“I’m not him,” Crow echoed quietly as if trying to convince himself as much as Cayde. “But it feels like I’m paying for things he did.”

Cayde stepped a little closer now, his voice lowering. “You’re not. You’re makin’ your own fate now, Crow. You’re more than what came before. More than what people say.” He paused, then added, almost as an afterthought, “Hell, more than what I say sometimes too.”

Crow blinked, surprised by the unexpected admission. From the moment they’d crossed paths he had seen Cayde as this unshakable figure—quick with a joke, even quicker with a gun. But here, now, he saw something more. Maybe even fragile.

“I don’t know how to let it go,” Crow admitted. “I don’t even know where to start.”

Cayde smiled faintly, a sad sort of smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Neither do I. But I’m here. You don’t have to figure it out all on your own.”

Crow hesitated, the knot of anger and confusion still tight in his chest, but something in Cayde’s words struck a chord. He wasn’t alone. Not entirely. Maybe Cayde had made mistakes, but right now, standing here in the quiet night, he was offering solidarity. 

After a long moment, Crow nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”

Cayde exhaled like he’d been holding his breath. “Good. Because, for the record, I don’t plan on going anywhere. So you might as well get used to me hanging around.”

He managed a faint smile of his own, the tension between them easing, just a little. “I’ll hold you to that.” They stood there for a few more moments, the silence between them no longer heavy with unsaid words, but lighter. 

And for the first time in what felt like forever, he didn’t feel quite so haunted.

They had settled back at the campfire. Crow was still tense, his thoughts heavy with the unresolved questions that lingered between them. Cayde sat across from him, poking the embers once more, his face dimly illuminated by the soft orange glow.

For a while, neither of them said anything at all. The fire crackled, casting long shadows on the walls of the cave they were in. Crow’s eyes flickered to Cayde, and after a long pause, he spoke again.

“Cayde?”

“Yeah?”

Crow hesitated, the words getting caught in his throat. His fingers drummed against his knee before he finally found the courage to ask. “I won’t…press you any more about him but I do have to know if you…if you regret any of it.”

Cayde stilled, his hand hovering over the fire for a moment. His gaze slowly lifted, meeting Crow’s across the flames. “Regrets…? No. Well…maybe about how it ended but even then, it's in the past now, kid. We have to move on, even if we’re not prepared to do it.”

“Could you tell me one thing about Uldren?” Crow asked quietly, looking down as he fiddled with the cuff of his sleeve. “Just…one thing. Not what everyone else says, but what you know. I need to hear it.”

Cayde’s eyes narrowed slightly, leaning back a bit as he considered the request. Crow could see the gears turning in his mind as if Cayde was weighing exactly what to say.

Finally, the Hunter sighed his voice quieter than usual. “You sure about this, Crow? I’m not gonna sugarcoat anything.”

“I’m sure,” He replied, his gaze fixed on the flames. “I just…I need something real.”

Cayde nodded slowly, his tone measured as he began. “Alright. One thing about Uldren Sov…” He trailed off as if searching for the right words. “Well, he was an asshole, frankly. Biggest jerk this side of Sol. And he had a stubborn streak a mile wide. Once he got an idea in his head, there was no stopping him. No reasoning, no convincing him otherwise.”

Crow blinked, surprised by the choice. “Stubborn?”

“Yeah,” Cayde said with a wry smile, his gaze distant now, like he was looking back on a memory only he could see. “He always had to do things the hard way. Always. Traveler help me, he was a pain in my ass. He never cared what it cost him. Didn’t care if it put him in danger. He’d double down just to prove a point.” He glanced at Crow, his smile fading a little. “Kinda reminds me of you sometimes.”

Crow felt his throat tighten. “Me?”

“Yeah, you.” Cayde’s smile returned, but there was a sadness to it now. “You’ve got that same fire in you. That drive to do what you think is right, even when the odds are stacked against you.”

Crow looked down, his thoughts a jumble. Stubborn. Hearing this—hearing something real, something more than just the ghost of the man everyone hated—made him feel both closer and farther away from who he used to be.

“He sounds like a terrible person,” Crow said after a moment, his voice barely audible.

Cayde chuckled softly, though there wasn’t much humor in it. “Yeah, but he wasn’t all bad. He fought for what he believed in, even when it put him on the wrong side of things. Doesn’t excuse what he did, but…maybe it’s something you should know.”

Crow nodded, the words sinking in. It didn’t ease the knot in his chest, but it was real like he’d asked for.

“I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to separate myself from him,” Crow admitted quietly. “No matter what I do, I feel like he’s still there…waiting. And no one else is going to let me forget that.”

Cayde leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he looked at Crow earnestly. “It doesn’t matter what other people think. Uldren Sov was his own mess. This is your fate now, do whatever you want with it.”

“I’m…not sure how to do that,” Crow whispered.

Cayde’s voice softened his words carrying a warmth that cut through the cold night air. “You start by deciding what matters to you. Not him, not the Vanguard or the Traveler, not me. Just you.”

He stared into the flames again, Cayde’s words turning over in his mind, but there was still something nagging at him. Something more personal that he hadn’t quite figured out. He glanced at Cayde again, watching him poke at the fire like nothing weighed too heavily on his shoulders.

“So… just how close were you two?” Crow asked, his voice tentative but curious.

Cayde let out a low chuckle. He leaned back again, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth as he raised an eyebrow. “Ah, getting to the juicy bits, huh, Bright Eyes?”

“I’m serious, Cayde.”

“Alright, alright.” Cayde held up his hands in mock surrender, but the grin didn’t fade. “Lemme think…well, we didn’t exchange friendship bracelets if that’s what you’re getting at.”

Crow narrowed his eyes, still not satisfied. “Yeah, but you don’t talk about him like he was your enemy either.”

“No, we weren’t enemies,” Cayde admitted, his gaze softening a little. “The world isn’t all black and white, Crow. There’s a whole spectrum of grays in there. And that’s where Uldren and I existed...Hell, I couldn’t tell you what we were. There isn’t a word that…fits. But I’d like to think there was respect between us.”

Crow tilted his head, curious. “Respect?”

“Yeah, I know, sounds weird right?” Cayde chuckled, shaking his head in amusement. “You ever meet a person that knows just how to get under your skin? Pushes all your buttons and leaves you feelin’ raw? Like you were ground down with sandpaper?”

Crow lifted an eyebrow, almost playfully. “Hey—no we’re not talking about me right now, alright?” Cayde pointed a finger at him. “This is Uldren Sov we’re talking about.” Then he was quiet for a moment before he continued. “That’s what he did to me every day. Bastard drove me crazy.” Cayde’s tone shifted at the end, almost sounding…wistful.

Crow watched Cayde’s face as he spoke. There was something unspoken beneath the humor, a layer of complexity that made him wonder just how far the connection went.

“So…you didn’t hate him?” Crow ventured carefully.

Cayde hesitated, his playful expression fading slightly. “Hate? Hell no. Truth is…I always hoped he’d be fighting on the same side with me one day.” He sighed, leaning forward again, his elbows resting on his knees. Crow shifted uncomfortably. He hadn’t considered that Cayde might have had a more complicated relationship with Uldren than just animosity. But it went so much deeper than he had ever thought.

“And now?” Crow asked quietly, his eyes flickering back to the flames. “Now that I’m…here?”

Cayde’s gaze softened further as he looked at Crow. “I’m glad you’re here, Crow.” 

Another beat passed before Crow decided to press further. “So, if he wasn’t a friend and he wasn’t an enemy…what was he to you?” 

“It’s like we were…” A small smile played on Cayde’s lips. “Like we were two black holes, circling one another…caught in each other’s pull. Until one finally consumed the other.”

“Who won?” He asked.

“I think I’m gonna call it a draw.” Cayde leaned back again, stretching his arms behind his head. “So, Bright Eyes, that answer your question? Or you fishing for more?”

Crow shook his head, smiling a little. “No, I think that’s enough for one night.”

Cayde nodded, his tone finally lightening again. “Good, ’cause I don’t much care for rehashing the past.”

“I asked several questions by the way,” now it was Crow’s turn to smile a little.

“Yeah, and you owe me for that too. Not fair to break your own rules.”

“Says the man who does it all the time.” His gaze lingered on Cayde for a moment longer, feeling both closer to the truth and more distanced from it than before. 

He didn’t know if he’d ever fully understand Uldren Sov, or where he fit in the story of his past. As the fire crackled between them, Crow felt a small weight lift, even if the burden of his identity remained. For now, that would have to be enough.

Chapter Text

Crow

“I’m going to put my hands on you now,” Cayde said from his position behind Crow, his voice pitched low as he approached. “Is that alright?”

Crow eyed the other man from under his hood, his mind unhelpfully spinning theories about how Cayde's hands might feel on his body. Would they be cold due to his Exo nature? He immediately dismissed the thought, remembering when Cayde had offered his hand during their first encounter in the Tangled Shore. 

How his strong grip pulled Crow so easily to his feet, how warmth had spread into his entire being. He swallowed hard, mentally preparing himself so that his voice sounded even when he finally replied. "I trust you."

"You're too stiff..." Cayde's low drawl was suddenly in his ear, a shudder passing through him at the sensation. So much for preparing himself. "Try rolling your shoulders and your neck, loosen up. You ain't a statue, Crow." He hesitated, a part of him wanting to argue about it, like he didn't know how to handle a Sniper Rifle. 

Ultimately, he gave in, not sure where the flare of sudden resistance had even come from. He let out a slow, even breath, dropping his arms and rolling his shoulders and his neck a few times. All the while, Cayde's sharp blue gaze was watching his every movement. His face heated a little, but he stayed focused on his stretches and his breathing.

"That's better," Cayde remarked, the subtle praise sending a little spark of pleasure down Crow's spine. "Let's widen your stance, too, while we're at it. Otherwise that rifle's gonna put you right on your ass. It's got one hell of a kick."

He reached out, hands gentle but firm as they found Crow’s shoulders, guiding him with the lightest touch. Crow’s breath hitched when Cayde nudged his legs apart with one foot, adjusting his stance, but he said nothing, his focus sharpening as Cayde positioned him correctly.

“Now, aim,” Cayde instructed quietly, his voice soft but commanding.

Crow adjusted his grip on the Sniper Rifle, bringing it up to his shoulder, Cayde staying just behind him. When Cayde seemed satisfied with Crow’s posture, he moved closer, slipping one hand around the other male and pressing it lightly against Crow’s chest, right over his rabbiting heart. 

That same familiar warmth started to spread through Crow’s body, making it harder for him to think straight. Let alone focus on their task at hand. It was like their dance all over again. Cayde was so close, he was right there. His touch and his words sinking into Crow, slipping into even the darkest parts of him. 

“Your heart’s beating like a war drum,” Cayde said in a husky whisper. “We need to slow it down. Take a deep breath.”

It felt like Cayde's hands had always been there, leaving their invisible brand on him wherever they touched. One little tiny little voice in him wanted to fight it, shove Cayde off, and chastise him for being so close. For invading his space all the time, as if he'd earned that right when Crow had never given him permission in the first place.

But he couldn't get the words out, because he knew they were a lie. Just a defense mechanism programmed into him from...from before his resurrection. In truth, he wanted Cayde all over him, in every way that mattered. 

“Cayde—”

“Just breathe,” Cayde repeated, this time a little firmer. His hand remained on Crow’s chest, he was certain Cayde could feel the rise and fall of his erratic breathing, the trembling underneath his skin. Crow finally inhaled deeply, his breath shaky but controlled, and slowly let it out.

Crow’s body relaxed just a fraction, the tension easing bit by bit, though his heart was still hammering under Cayde’s palm. “Still pretty fast there, Bright Eyes,” Cayde teased lightly, using one of the nicknames he’d given Crow.

“I’m nervous,” Crow admitted in a small voice.

"I know, it's alright. It's just us here. So I need you to stay in this moment with me, alright?"

Crow obeyed, drawing in another breath, this time deeper and steadier. He exhaled slowly, the frantic beating of his heart giving way to something slower, more even. “Much better,” he said softly. “Now, you’ve got your target in your sights?”

“Yes,” Crow whispered, his gaze sharpening as he zeroed in on the distant metal target. “I see it.”

“Alright,” Cayde said, stepping back just slightly, giving Crow space. “On your next exhale, pull the trigger. Let it be smooth.”

Crow’s breath steadied once more, and as he exhaled, he pulled the trigger. The rifle bucked in his hands, but Cayde was right there, bracing him with firm footing so that Crow wouldn’t be thrown off balance. A sharp metallic clang echoed across the distance as the bullet hit its mark, sending the metal target spinning wildly.

He lowered the rifle, staring at the distant target in disbelief. “I can’t believe I hit that,” Awe crept into his voice as he straightened once more. “I’ve never hit a target that far. That shot…it should be impossible.”

Cayde chuckled softly, stepping up beside him. “And yet it wasn’t.” He glanced at Crow, a glint of pride in his eyes. “Controlling your body is just as important as controlling your mind. You’ve got the instincts, you just need to trust them.”

Crow turned slightly, catching Cayde’s gaze for a moment before looking away, a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips. “Thanks, Cayde.”

Cayde clapped a hand lightly on Crow’s back, his touch lingering for just a second longer than necessary. “Its nothing, soon enough you’ll be hittin’ shots like that in your sleep, Bright Eyes. Just wait.”

He glanced at Cayde again, this time with a bit more ease, and for once, that tiny little voice in his brain offered no resistance. 

“Now, what do you say we hit a few more targets? I’ve got a good feeling about this.”

Crow nodded, lifting the rifle once more. “Yeah…let’s do it.”

****

“Please tell me you did not have sexual relations with that thing.” They both burst into a fit of laughter as they sat next to one another in the bar. They were each a few shots in by now, Crow nearly spat out his drink at Cayde’s question, face flushed as his eyes darted in every direction but the other man’s face.

“Oh dear, Traveler, you did.” Cayde whistled lowly. “Can’t decide if I’m impressed or concerned about your mental health. And look, I’m not judging, I’ve done some freaky things myself. But there’s freaky and there’s…really freaky. Pretty sure what you did falls under the latter.”

“Spider went into heat and there were pheromones and I was just in the r-room and we didn’t actually do anything—”

“Alright, alright, calm down. I told you I ain’t judging. Here I thought Spider had a hold on you, guess I was wrong.” Cayde grinned over his drink. “Let me tell you about the time a Scorn Guard was left to watch me. As you can probably gather, the Guard was stupid, and never brought me anything to eat or drink. Guess it thought Exos didn’t have to do that.” He said as he ran a finger around the edge of the class.

Crow wasn't even really paying attention to the story at all, something about being left to rot in a cell. It sounded like there was someone else too, but Cayde never mentioned them by name. “Anyways, there I was, out of my mind and hallucinating in my cell. And this guy comes in gun blazing, looking like hell itself, and he unloads onto the poor bastard…I mean every bullet right in the thing’s head. It was…”

“It sounds hot,” Crow remarked.

“Oh, he was hot alright.” Cayde whistled lowly. “He could melt paint off the walls.”

“Wait, you mean you and him…”

“Fucked like bunnies? Absolutely. I swear to the Traveler after the first time we had sex, it was like he became a damn incubus. And you wanna talk freaky? He once used a shock collar on me. Not sure I ever came so hard in all my lives.”

“That is uh…” Crow’s face couldn’t be more red. “That’s some history.”

“Yeah…” Cayde sighed softly. “Everyone knows he was like a bad guy, you know. Just about every Guardian in the Sol system wanted his head. Thing is…I look back on all that time I was with him and I could swear I saw somethin’ good.”

Cayde clearly cared a great deal for this person. Whenever he spoke about them, his eyes got brighter, his voice...happier. But he could also sense that Cayde missed them, that he'd lost a person for whom he would do anything. 

And it always made Crow's chest ache, because while he was newly rezzed and still had much to learn, he wasn't entirely brainless. He was beginning to feel something for Cayde. Something so deep, it was as if it were ingrained in him from...from before.

“Or you had Stockholm Syndrome.” Crow was smiling at him now, just a little quirk of the lips.

“You could be right.” They clinked their glasses together before Cayde swallowed his drink. “I used to wonder what he’d be like, what kind of choices he would have made if things had been different.” Then he looked at Crow again, his expression softening. “I don’t have to wonder anymore.”

“You know, with the shock collars and the shooting people, that’s a pretty high bar.” Crow scooted just a bit closer, their thighs brushing together. 

Cayde raised an eyebrow at the man next to him. “You’re being serious right now?”

“What? You just told me this person electrocuted you to the point of orgasm!” Crow whispered the last part. “I can’t possibly be expected to…live up to that.”

Crow's smile fell a little when he realized that he couldn't find it in himself to come between Cayde and whoever this mystery person was. His eyes stung, and that stupid, tiny voice in his brain got louder. So loud it was drowning out this wondrous moment between them. How could he think he was so special? That Cayde would feel anything for him? They were just...

They were just training, that was all. Cayde was his mentor. Nothing more.

"What's wrong, Feathers? You got that broody look again..."

"No it's nothing." He lied, forcing himself to look at his drink instead. The blue liquid inside was a little too close to Cayde's eyes for his liking. Anger, white and hot and visceral, flared through him. He shouldn't be here. "Who is this person you're always talking about? Why aren't you with them instead of me?" Jealousy coated his words like acid, eroding away everything else.

"He died..." Cayde's reply cut through him, stopping his sudden spiral into feelings that he was certain were not his own, dead in their tracks. "I did everything I could to save him, but uh...well some people got stubbornness issues." When he met Cayde's eyes again, he had a sad smile on his face, and all that jealousy and rage faded almost as quickly as it had come.

Traveler, what the hell was wrong with him?

"I...I'm sorry, I thought..."

"It's alright. It ain't your fault. Just for the record, you’re everything he wasn’t, Crow." His hand fell on Crow's, thumb stroking back and forth, soothing all the hard edges of Crow's soul. “You’re kind, gentle…everything you do is because you want to make the galaxy a better place. I know he could never be that guy, no matter how much I wanted him to be.”

"You should go back, Cayde. To the Vanguard."

"What? And leave you here with Spider? Absolutely not. We're one Baron away, Feathers."

"From what? What are we working towards?"

"Traveler above still so damn blind to what's right in front of you..." Cayde muttered under his breath, sounding exasperated. Then Cayde grabbed him by the front of his hood, pressing his lips against Crow's. The sudden contact made him freeze instantly, he found himself unable to think or move as if there were static noise inside his brain instead of actual thought. It didn't seem to deter Cayde from slotting his warm lips against Crow's, deepening the kiss. And he found himself lost in it.

He was kissing back, his mouth moving with Cayde's while his hand went up the Hunter's arm and then his nape. Pleasure burst through just about every nerve ending, and everything else outside of that moment simply ceased to exist. He was drowning in Cayde's scent, his touch, and his taste. And he wanted more. He wanted all of him.

Crow broke away for air, his eyes meeting the other male's, and he saw something there that he'd been feeling all along. "I'm here for you, Crow. How many times do I gotta say it? What do I have to do to prove it?"

"Take me back to your skiff...pretend I'm...pretend I'm not me. Just some guy in the bar. What would you do?"

"But you're not just anyone, I can't just—"

"Can't what? Fuck me? I know you want to. I can see it every time you look at me, Cayde. So just rip off the band-aid and do it."

"It’s not that simple...besides, you've been drinking." Now it was Cayde's turn to avoid eye contact, and the subject at hand for that matter.

"It is that simple. And I've had maybe two shots, I'm not drunk. I know what I want, so why are we dancing around this?"

****

Crow started it first, he’d lunged for Cayde and pulled him into a deep kiss. 

Cayde backed him up against the nearest wall, their boots scuffing along the floor while they continued to trade hot kisses. He pinned Crow there with a final push, his body hitting the wall with a small thud. Crow shuddered all over, a breathless sigh leaving him.

His hands began to wander, finding their way into Crow’s clothes, touching bare skin. The muscles twitched underneath, which had Cayde grinning against his lips.

“Sensitive Bright Eyes?”

“H-haven’t been touched by anyone since I was…brought back.”

“You sure you want this then? With me?”

“I’ve been wanting you since the day you found me in the Tangled Shore.” Crow grabbed Cayde’s Hunter hood and kissed him again, his tongue lapping at his mouth. 

“Getting a gun drawn on you turned you on huh?” He teased as he went to unbuckle their belts, Crow’s hand coming down to stop him.

“Only when it’s you,” Crow growled out, stealing one more kiss before he dropped to his knees in front of Cayde. He stayed frozen there as Crow unbuckled his belt and pulled his cock free. Then, without any warning, Crow wrapped his warm, wet mouth around Cayde’s length.

“C-Crow…” Cayde said in a low gasp.

Traveler, his name sounded like a prayer coming from Cayde. As if he could save him, as if he could purify him. He slid his hands up Cayde's pants, feeling his strong thighs even under his Hunter's pants. His mind immediately produced an image of those thighs in good use, ramming that beautifully ridged dick into him over and over. A moan left him as he took Cayde deeper into his mouth. It wasn't an easy task, and before long, he had to come to a stop when the tip of his member hit his gag reflex.

Above him, he heard one of Cayde's fists hit the wall, a loud groan coming from the other man. "Y-your mouth...fuck your mouth feels so damn good..." His other hand carded into the long side of Crow's hair, gripping tightly. He gasped a little when Cayde tugged hard, a little spark of pain traveling down his limbs. There was something...forbidden about knowing he had Cayde—this legend of a Hunter—at his mercy.

He took a slow, deep breath through his nose, looking up at Cayde through his bangs as he finally took those last few inches, his nose pressed against the male's abdomen. "Oh fuck…f-fuck yes...l-let me use that mouth..." Cayde pulled out slowly, forcing him to feel every ridge before he thrusted back into Crow's mouth. He did this a few more times, clearly enjoying the sight of Crow on his knees. "Th-that's it...that's it take my cock."

Crow closed his eyes and submitted to him, allowing Cayde to set the pace. He felt the male's grip tighten on his hair but he couldn't bring himself to give a shit. The sensation of Cayde's cock thrusting into mouth and the noises the Exo was making were enough to drown it out. Crow slid his hands further up, grabbing Cayde's ass and somehow forcing him even deeper. His throat clenched around the length in protest, air getting harder to take into his lungs.

"Oh shit...oh f-fuck I-I'm not g-gonna last long you k-keep this up!" Crow wanted to see him come undone, he wanted to feel Cayde's hot seed down his throat. So he doubled down his efforts, sucking in his cheeks as he moved with Cayde. Every time he took the male's cock to the hilt, his nose brushing against Cayde's stomach. He was a slave to the rough pace, to Cayde's fingers pulling on his hair. The mixture of pain and pleasure was enough to cloud his mind and make him dizzy with it.

Or was that the lack of oxygen? Hell, he didn't care. "C-Crow...Crow! I-I'm coming! I'm gonna fucking come!" Cayde buried every inch of his cock down his throat as he came. When Crow met his gaze again, Cayde's eyes were flickering as he released stream after stream of that hot synthetic seed. And Crow drank down every last drop. Only then did he finally pull off, panting harshly.

For a while, the only sound inside the skiff was their heavy breathing. When Crown finally caught his breath, he slowly stood, shedding his cloak, boots and pants. Cayde followed suit, his clothes hitting the floor, leaving him bare before Crow.

Why was he so damn beautiful?

He slowly neared Cayde, pulling him close again, their lips meeting in another heated kiss. He ravaged Cayde's mouth, his tongue exploring every part of it. Together they moved towards the bed, landing on it in a tangle of limbs.

Cayde pinned him quickly, his hot lips trailing a path of fire down Crow's body. His large hands spread his thighs apart, the thrill of anticipation settled deep and hot in his gut when Cayde opened up his mouth, revealing a glowing, ridged tongue. Talk about having an Ace up his sleeve.  

Desire shot through his every nerve when he realized what Cayde was going to do with it. He didn't even have time to think about it before that tongue was against his hole, rimming around the edges at first, teasing testing, opening him up slowly.

A cry was all but ripped from him when that hot tongue pushed into him, stretching his walls. He felt no pain, only sweet nirvana as Cayde ate him out like he was his last meal. "Cayde...Cayde oh fuck...fuck that feels so good! Please...please...!" 

He didn't know what the hell he was begging for, he only knew that Cayde had what he wanted, what he needed. He moved his hips desperately, his legs hooked over Cayde's shoulders. His hands fisted the sheets as Cayde drove that molten tongue of his in even deeper, harsher, taking Crow to a place he didn't even know was possible.

He didn't think he could come from this alone, but he was starting to second-guess that as each thrust pushed him closer, closer to the edge of what would be an earth-shattering, maybe even reality-altering release. 

"Cayde! Cayde, please, please, I need it! I need to come, let me come please!" Crow was whining, begging like a bitch in heat, like that time he was all drugged out on Spider's pheromones, he could think of nothing more than the sweet bliss Cayde was promising him. His body drew tighter, his release coiling tight in the pit of his stomach; he was right on the edge of it when Cayde broke away.

"Not yet..." He said, panting as he wiped his saliva-slicked lips. "When you come, its gonna be on my cock. I’m gonna make you see fucking stars, Bright Eyes."

Crow rolled them so Cayde was under him. A flash of something tugging at the edges of his mind. Had they done this before? He shook his head, focusing instead on grinding against the Exo, his cock already growing hard again as if he hadn't just come down Crow's throat only mere minutes ago.

"F-fuck...so it's true what they say about an Exo's stamina..."

“That’s it, sweetheart…” Cayde moaned breathlessly as Crow began to lower himself onto his length, his tight entrance clenching around his cock. “Take every inch…”

“I-I’m trying.” Crow’s face flushed, back slightly arched. “You’re just so…b-big.”

“I know, but you can take it. Here, let me help—” He went to place his hands on Crow’s hips only for the Crow to bat them away.

“N-no. I can do it. Please, Cayde, let me.”

“Alright. If that’s what you want.” He dropped his hands and he watched as Crow slowly lifted himself off of his cock before thrusting back down onto it. A low cry left them both as Cayde’s length slid fully inside him. “Oh fuck…that’s…so damn tight…” 

“Oh…Oh, Cayde…” Crow moaned softly as he speared himself on Cayde’s dick, hard and desperate. “F-feels so good. Right there, right fucking there.” Cayde gripped Crow’s hips, matching his pace as he thrusted up into him. He jolted hard, his hair falling into his face as he bit his lip. 

He had Cayde right where he wanted him, and it was even better than he had imagined. The sound of their panting and Crow’s thighs slapping against Cayde’s metal skin filled the room as the pace became wild, desperate. Little moans of “Ah-ah…Ah!” left the other him while he rode Cayde’s cock like his life depended on it.

“Gettin’ close already?” Cayde whispered while he wrapped a hand around Crow’s thick member, stroking it in time with his thrusts.

“Y-yes please…please Cayde, I-I’m gonna come…I’m gonna come all over your cock!”

“Let me see it then, sweetheart. Don’t hold back on account of me.” His thumb teased the tip, pressing into the slit. 

It was the final straw for Crow, his whole body going stiff as he came, spilling thick, hot ropes of seed all over Cayde’s abdomen. He continued to stroke his length, milking it for every drop and leaving Crow a trembling mess. “That’s it…you did so good.”

“But…but you didn’t.”

“Don’t worry darlin’, there’s plenty enough time for that.” Cayde slowly rolled them over. “I ain’t going anywhere.” He whispered as he brought Crow into a sweet kiss, claiming his mouth as he started again, this time slower.  

****

He was lost in that sea of blue again, drowning in it. He clawed desperately for a while, his chest burning. Memories play in his vision of when he was stuck in the vacuum of space, his ship dead in the water as he died over and over. Yes. He knew what an eternity felt like. One moment stretched into the next, with no end in sight.

What breath was in his lungs burst into bubbles as he sank deeper, deeper into the abyss. Crow watched helplessly as the air bubbles rose to the surface, which felt as if it were getting further and further away. He no longer felt the need for breathing, it slipped away from him. He looked into the black below and surrendered himself to it. Allowing it to pull him down.

Down into its depths, which seemed to stretch into eons.

He wasn't sure how long it went on for, or if he died somewhere in between. When his eyes opened again, there was solid ground beneath his feet, and the ocean of blue was long gone. It's nothing but pitch black now, and even when he managed to stagger to his feet, he wasn't sure where he was going. Or which direction was the right one.

Instead, he was guided on impulse, one foot placed in front of the other.

Dying, being rezzed, dying again. This played over and over in his mind as he forged a path through the nothingness. There was a flicker of something far off in the distance. It was nothing more than a speck, but hope sprung blossomed in his chest at the sight of it. He began to run, as far and as fast as he could, his steps pounding on the ground under his as raced towards the ember.

It started to take shape the closer he got to it, at first it was all oranges and reds; just colors with no real shape to speak of. Blues and purples began to mix in as he drew near, his footsteps slowing down when a great massive walls suddenly erupted from the ground, sealing him off.

He came to stop just outside the great walls, some of the colors still spilled from the very top which were so massive in scale Crow thought they might be able to touch that blue he'd been drowning in earlier. Then he reached out with one hand, touching the wall. It's rough texture felt as real as anything else, little pieces of it crumbled off on his finger tips.

What was this? Why did it feel...like it was part of him? Or...all of him? He walked around the wall, looking for a way inside. He came to a halt at a set of ornate doors as tall as the sky, their surface painted with familiar gold sigils. He patted himself down for a key, but he found none.

"Do you want to know what happens next?" Cayde was standing there beside him, holding out a key in the palm of his hand.

"I-I don't know..." Crow answered honestly. He realized then he could see bits and pieces of things through the sliver between the door.

There's...someone holding a gun. One he's held before. A flash and a bang sound, and then he's commanding the Barons to wreak their havoc upon the Reef. Finally, there's a portal. One made of Dark and Light. Crow couldn't stand to look at the slivers anymore. He turned back to Cayde.

"I'll hold onto it then. We'll unlock it together."

****

Cayde

A few weeks later

He stared out at the Last City, hands on the guard rails. A quiet breeze played at the tattered ends of his cloak, lifting it slightly each time it kissed the fabric. He hadn't thought he'd ever be back here. Sure, the Tower was home, but it could also be just as much a tomb.

The suffocating weight of his Vanguard duties and the too-small walls were enough to make him long for the time he spent as a prisoner inside the Watchtower. In that cramped cell, with the broken mirror that reflected multiple versions of his face right back at him, with the half-a-faucet constantly drip, drip, dripping. 

Hell he...

He even kind of missed the madness of DER. And that sad sort of smile that his hallucination of Uldren carried throughout the duration of their adventure down the rabbit hole that was Cayde's psyche. Then, when the real Uldren showed up, to pull him out of the fifty-thousand leagues under the Sea of Cayde's Insanity, they formed a bond so strange and unique that Cayde could only equate that he must have been in love, right?  

It couldn't possibly be that they were linked by the same traumatic event (i.e. Uldren deciding to put one between his eyes) and that was the real foundation of their relationship.

Or was it all that melting-the-paint-off-the-walls sex that had colored his judgment? Making him feel sorry for a man who was a murderer—a genocidal one at that? He idly traced his finger along the railing as his gaze finally moved to the Traveler. 

There had to be a reason. A reason he'd been put there in that Prison. A reason that he'd lived, when rightly he should have been dead all along. A reason the Traveler gave that same man, that same ex-Prince a Ghost of all things.

Being a Guardian was supposed to mean the slate was wiped clean; Zavala himself preached this above all else. Their past—whoever they were before—wasn't supposed to matter. But, as admirable as Zavala's speeches were at the time, things weren’t always so black and white. 

Cayde had lived most of his life, or lives as it were, in that foggy little gray area he'd been chatting about so casually a few months ago. That same gray area where he learned to find common ground with Uldren. Where he learned that sometimes...sometimes sacrifice meant watching someone he never thought he'd give a damn about die right in front of him.

And then suddenly it was all Cayde could do to not think about him.

It was all he could do to stuff it down, to wipe that slate clean every time he looked at Crow. Every time the grief threatened to snap him up and drag him back down into that fucking hole. 

And, Traveler, some days he really, really wished he'd given himself over to those peaceful visions of the garden he'd seen when his mind was on the brink of being lost altogether.

Now, with the last Baron gone, and Crow being free but not really free...it was only a matter of time before the past caught up with the present. And they'd find themselves revisiting that moment. The one every Guardian was still punishing Crow for, even if it wasn't him that pulled the trigger. Truth never mattered much when you had vengeance on your side and a Golden Gun in your hands.

And that didn't even touch the subject of the looks Cayde was still getting from everyone. The scrutiny, the judgement, even. How could he stay 'dead' and not tell his closest friends, the people who had known him for centuries? For lifetimes? He sighed, his hand running along his Hunter's hood. Nothing could ever be simple.

Not one thing in Cayde's long history had ever been simple. Not even love. Because despite all his grief and sadness about Uldren. Something was beginning to simmer under the surface every time he glanced at Crow. 

He wouldn't dare put a name to it, not when things were still so fragile between them. Certainly, they had shared moments together (some very recently) that had bordered on being more than just two Hunters out in the Wilds. But how could he be certain it wasn't just their circumstances pulling them together again?

That they wouldn't just consume each other, like Riven had predicted?

He needed to know this was... the real thing. The real deal. Because if he was going to risk himself again, to put his heart—his metaphorical one—on the line a second time, there would be no coming back from it if things went south.

"I ain't never asked much from you." He said quietly, to no one in particular. Though a part of him hoped that maybe, for all its benevolent omnipotence, the Traveler could cut a guy some slack. "You brought him back...because he was meant to be here. I know that. And I...well, I've had a hard time with it. But if this is...if this is really your will for me and him to be...well, to be what you made us, I'm gonna need a sign or something…Last time I acted on blind faith...well, you were there."

"Cayde," Ikora's gentle voice came from behind him, and he hung his head in response. If this was another one of her lectures about his not-so-secret undeath in the Tangled Shore— "You know that's not how it works." She placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I thought you were mad at me.”

“How could I stay mad? Why don’t you have tea…with an old friend?” Ikora asked, a small smile on her face. Cayde’s shoulders slumped; he hadn’t wanted to put any of this on her. “Come.”

He followed her out of the bazaar and into the quiet library, thankful when the door was shut. He sat down and watched as she placed a kettle on a small burner and used her Solar Light to warm it. She then poured two glasses of camomile tea, handing Cayde one. “What’s troubling you?”

“Where do I even start?” He scoffed a little, taking a sip before he continued. “I was shot…imprisoned by a guy with a bad haircut and an obsession with his sister…I spent all that time with him, watching him devolve further into what he became. All the while, desperately thinking I could be the one to stop it. Not sure I’ve ever been so stupid.”

“Cayde, you are many things,” Ikora said as she sat across from him. “But stupid is not one of them. You must have seen something in him. Something no one else could see.”

“Maybe…” he took another drink. “Now…Here he is, alive and breathing, but it ain’t really him. I keep seeing him do all these little things…Mannerisms, you know? They take me right back into the past. And it makes me wonder…”

“You worry that Uldren Sov is lurking inside Crow somewhere. That he’s just waiting to resurface.”

“Yes.” He said as he glanced at her briefly. “I don’t want to think that. He’s so different from what he used to be in a lot of ways. When I found him again, he didn’t want to know about his past…Now he’s wondering if not knowing is actually worse. Maybe…Maybe the kid is onto something Ikora.”

“Or maybe he’s not and there’s something larger at play here that none of us understand.” She sighed softly. “Cayde, I can tell you care very deeply for him, you might not want to say it. You don’t need to. But whether or not he wants to discover who he was is a choice that only Crow can make. How it will affect him…I suspect only the Traveler knows.”

“So where does that leave me? I’m just supposed to sit here and watch? Again? I hate feeling this way. I’ve always known what to do and when to act. But when it comes to him, it all flies out the window.” He looked up from his glass of tea, finding Ikora smiling at him knowingly. “What? ”

“I think I’ll take back what I said earlier, you’re a little oblivious at times.”

“Sheesh, could at least prepare a guy before you insult him.”

“Come to me when you’re ready to tell me how you feel about Crow. And then maybe I’ll apologize.” She teased as she took their empty glasses.

“Yeah, alright.” He grumbled.

Chapter Text

Cayde: 

Initially, Cayde wasn’t surprised when Osiris took a liking to Crow. Having once been the Warlock Vanguard, Osiris had nearly been outcast for his part in creating the Sundial. Using it to break all of time to bring back his lover, a hulking Exo Titan with a Russian accent by the name of Saint-14. 

Saint was the kind of guy that liked to solve problems with a Void Shield thrown right at his enemies like a frisbee of death. When that failed, he’d bash their brains in with his own head, and Cayde respected him for it. So he turned Crow over to them, despite this lingering feeling in his chest. This tightness he couldn’t seem to shake.

But not without one final gift. He waited for the male at the H.E.L.M., away from prying eyes. When he saw Crow approaching, the hood of his new cloak hiding his features, his cardiac drive picked up the pace. The lighter colors of the new outfit suited him. Much more than that old ratty cloak Spider had made him wear.

Long gone were the blood red pants, too. Replaced instead by warmer gray tones.

“You look good.” Cayde smiled a little. 

He could see the flush in Crow’s cheeks as the male replied. “Thanks…Glint chose the materials.”

“We gotta keep your presence under wraps as much as possible…I might have smoothed things over with Ikora, Osiris, and Saint, but Big Blue…that’s gonna take a bit more tact and charisma. So for the time being, you’ll wear this.” He unwrapped the package he’d been holding, revealing a black mask with intricate patterns. 

Crow took it into his hands, turning it over, inspecting it. “I understand why I have to wear it. If it means making a difference…” He put it on carefully. “Then I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“Just…be careful. I’ve been hearing some chatter about the Cabal. I don’t want you gettin’ caught up in whatever’s going on.”

“I will, Cayde, you have my word.”

“I’d better have more than that.” He leaned in and kissed the mask, right where Crow’s mouth would be. When he broke away, he noticed Crow’s pupils were a little dilated, and that had him grinning like an idiot.

****

Not more than a few weeks had passed when Cayde had been called to his Commander’s aide, Ikora, standing off to the side. He shifted from one foot to the other, hand on the hilt of his gun. Even through his gloves, he knew it wasn't his Ace. It never would be. Something about that made him stop the motion entirely, choosing to cross his arms instead.

“So just where were you when you saw the ghost of Uldren Sov?” Ikora asked their Commander with a raised eyebrow.

“I was here, in the first garden we planted. It was a cool night…nothing out of the ordinary. Everything was quiet. I just wanted a moment of peace. To take a breath. And I could feel eyes on me…I turned around and I could see Uldren Sov right there.” Zavala pointed toward a rather large bush. It was certainly big enough for someone, say a certain Hunter, to hide in.

“What do you know?” Zavala’s deep voice rumbled as he turned on Cayde.

“Me?” Cayde put his hands up in mock surrender. “I don’t know anything. Not sure what you’re talking about, but the Prince, well that Prince , is definitely dead.” Guilt churned in his gut as he made eye contact with Ikora. She was giving him a look. And after knowing her for so long, he knew exactly what that look meant: keep your big mouth shut .

“We thought you were dead, too, Cayde.” Zavala’s tone became stern, his gaze hardened. “And yet here you stand. In the flesh.” 

“Well…that’s just because it's me.” He attempted to laugh it off, but inside, he felt like the wiring in his stomach was being twisted into knots. This was bad, so very, very bad . He had been specific. Told Crow to keep a low profile. It was as if he’d saved Crow from one thing, only to nearly have him found out by the very person they were trying hardest to keep his identity from.

Out of the frying pan and into the fire…

“Whether it was the Prince or not is of little consequence.” Ikora cut through the silence. “What do we actually know?”

“It was a Psion that held the gun.” The Commander answered softly. “Which means the Cabal are willing to take risks, to start a war with us—the Vanguard—to get what they want. We must not let them succeed. I will work with Lord Saladin to begin countermeasures. From this moment on, the City is in lockdown.”

****

Crow

“What the hell were you thinking? He saw you!” Osiris bellowed at him, anger thick in his voice.

“He didn’t see anything.” Crow bit back, not budging an inch.

“You weren’t even wearing your mask! You’re lucky he’s dismissed as a delusion or a hallucination!” 

Crow scoffed, shifting his stance from one foot to the other. He had been holding his mask in his hand for Traveler’s sake. It had been right there! And yet he’d almost blown his cover entirely. 

“Okay, yes, I should have had the mask on, but I don’t regret saving the Commander’s life.”

“Zavala is more than capable of dispatching a lone Psion.”

“Look, it doesn’t matter,” Cayde finally interjected. “What’s done is done. For now, Zavala still thinks it was a trick of the light.”

Osiris turned his critical gaze to Cayde, pinning him in place. “You stay out of this. Your insight is not needed here, nor is it wanted.”

“If I hadn’t done what I did…the Commander would be without his Light…or worse. The Cabal are taking risks, getting inside the walls of the City just to get to us. We can’t let that happen.”

Osiris was quiet for a moment, hand on his masked chin in thought. “Then I’m appointing you as his bodyguard.”

“Uhh…you just said the kid almost blew his cover. Do you really think it's a good idea to put him right under Big Blue’s nose?”

“Do not speak to him, and do not remove your mask. Can I trust you to handle this with diligence?” Osiris said as he turned back to Crow.

“The utmost.” He replied lowly, waiting for Osiris to leave before he walked to his normal spot in the H.E.L.M.

“Crow, wait up!” Cayde called after him, quickly catching up. “This is reckless. You said you wouldn’t put yourself in danger, and you’re right in the middle of it!”

“It doesn’t matter, you said so yourself. I’m going to do what I can to protect the Commander. What will you do?” His voice was edged slightly. Maybe it was just all the stress, but he was tired of everyone, including Cayde, telling him what to do or how to feel.

Cayde sighed a little, running a hand along his hood like he did whenever he got a little fidgety. “Fine, alright. The least I can do is figure out where the Psion came from, and we can come at this with a united front. Alright?”

****

They stood in the Proving Grounds, a breeze passing through the space between Empress Caital and Commander Zavala. They had agreed to an armistice. Not an alliance exactly. An uneasy peace, more like. Considering the alternative was an all-out war, though, this was a better outcome than even Lord Saladin had predicted. 

A Psion stepped forward and retrieved a gilded blade, offering it to the Empress as it bowed before her grandeur. “Let our blood be the last spilled,” her voice carried over the Proving Grounds as she sliced her own palm. “Let this ground be hallowed, let honor bind us,” she said, handing it back over to the Psion. 

As the creature began to walk across the space, anxiety stewed in Crow’s gut. He couldn’t quite place it, but it was almost like when he’d walked through the Trapper’s Cave in the Tangled Shore looking for Cayde. That sixth sense, that gut feeling that something was about to go terribly wrong. 

Just as the Psion offered the gilded blade a shot rang out across the Proving Grounds, striking Zavala’s Ghost, Targe, sending it to the ground. The Commander cried out as he was forcibly separated from his light. The Psion moved quickly, raising the weapon it held in its hands, poised to strike. 

Crow moved without thought, instinct driving him forward as he leapt forward, barely blocking the blow. The force of it sent him to the ground, his mask landing in the dirt, somehow still in one piece. He reached over to the Commander’s Ghost, which lay only a few inches away, and managed to free it of the device that was strangling its connection to the Light. 

“Are you alright?” The Commander’s voice was filled with concern. It shouldn’t have been, not for him. Crow hadn’t done anything to deserve it. And now he was about to do the one thing Cayde and Osiris had been begging him not to. But as far as he could tell, he had no other choice. He had to reveal himself; it was now or never.

He rolled over, eyes meeting Zavala’s, holding his gaze as he replied. “I’m…alive.” Though he didn’t think he’d be for much longer. For all their secret keeping, surely there had to be a reason. Perhaps Cayde and Osiris thought Zavala couldn’t handle seeing who Crow used to be.

When Zavala looked away for a moment, he felt uncertainty weighing down like a stone on his chest. But then…like Cayde, he had done something Crow never expected.

He offered his hand.

****

The next few weeks passed in a slow, inky kind of way. Crow was no longer restricted only to the H.E.L.M., the Commander having given a clear order to all Guardians in the Tower. That didn’t mean that things were completely smoothed over, though. Whenever he was in the Bazaar, he could feel eyes on him. 

All the while, it felt like other pieces were falling into place. Things in the background that he couldn’t place. Until one morning, he received an odd summons.

“It’s…from Queen Mara,” Glint said quietly, his little voice filled with apprehension. “She is requesting your presence. Osiris will be there too.”

“You seem hesitant about this.”

“I…I am. But this is your choice, Crow. I’m with you no natter what.”

“I should talk to Cayde, try to get ahead of it.” He sighed a little and pulled his cloak on. 

His Ghost spun around his shell thoughtfully before he replied. “He may not be happy to hear about you meeting with her.”

“It’s not his choice.” He bit out, anger lashing at the surface again. Traveler, how he hated these reactions sometimes. Like something old and viscious bubbling up from the depths. “I’m sorry…let’s just go.” Crow holstered his weapon quickly and headed out to Cayde’s usual spot.

****

“Alright, you’re all set. Good luck out there.” Cayde said to the fledgling Hunter in front of him, who nodded and trotted off.

“Did you just give that Hunter the ‘finger guns’?” Crow asked as he came up behind Cayde.

“What? Oh sure. Gives the fresh ones some hope.”

“Yeah, false hope.”

“If I had any other kind available, I’d give ‘em that. Unfortunately, the stock’s a little low right now.” Cayde turned away and began to sort through the armory. “Do you need something? I’m kinda busy.”

“You’re not busy, Cayde, so stop pretending to look through the weapon caches. I’m here to talk to you about my pa—”

“Yes! I know!” He threw up his arms helplessly. “Your past, your past…that’s all you ever want to talk about. Look, kid…You got somethin’ special. You got somethin’ people almost never get.”

“And what’s that?”

“A second chance.” Finally, at this, Crow dropped his folded arms, his body language shifting. “You’re wastin’ it by trying to figure out what you did with the first one.”

“Would you at least explain why…You won’t tell me?”

He seemed deep in thought about this, as if carefully considering his words before he spoke again. “You have to make your own fate, Crow. Walk your own path. Nothin’ in your past is gonna help you do that.”

“You were in my past. You helped me.”

“Yes, and I’m helping you now. In the present. Where it matters .” Cayde sighed and walked up to Crow, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Please let it go. Trust me on this.”

“What if I…what if I can’t let go of it? Every time the Vanguard tells me that things will get better, I thank them. As if it’s a privilege not to be beaten to death.” Cayde visibly flinched at his words. “Our past lives aren’t supposed to matter, right? I’m beginning to wonder why I’m the only Guardian being judged by mine.” 

Cayde let out a low sigh as he leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms. “What are you trying to tell me, Crow?”

“Queen Mara Sov has requested to meet with me. And I’m going. I…I’d like you to be there. Please. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I feel like I need to see this through.”

“This is a terrible idea…”

“Something tells me you know about terrible ideas.”

“I do,” Cayde finally smiled a little. “And…they usually work out.”

****

As he walked through the halls of the Dreaming City, it finally dawned on him that Cayde was right; this was a terrible idea. But he was nothing if not stubborn, and he would get to the bottom of this. He looked around at the massive, ornate architecture that surrounded them as he walked up to the Queen of the Awoken.

When she turned towards him, something deep inside his body resonated with her. Like twin heartbeats. “I’d hoped you would find your way back.”

“I feel a little lost, actually…this feels familiar though. Do I…know you?” The words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them. The Queen gave him a measured look, her eyes glancing back to Cayde and Saint just behind him.

Before anyone could get another word out, Saint came charging forward. “Osiris! You must come home!” His thick Russian accent bellowed through the halls. “The Vanguard will show mercy!”

“Oh yes, Ikora and Commander Zavala have been nothing, if not generous.” Osiris’ tone became insidious, taunting almost. Nothing like the Warlock that had taken Crow in when almost no one else would have risked such a thing. “Queen Mara, just look how they have accepted the Crow into their flock.” 

Crow stepped forward carefully, his movements careful. Deliberate. “It's not too late…” he said quietly. “You can still be forgiven.”

“Careful,” Osiris replied as he stepped backwards into the middle of the room. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Mara moved into the circle next, eyes glowing brighter in the darkness of the room as she cast an Awoken spell of some kind. Right before their eyes, Osiris became…something else. A frozen statue, huge and looming. 

“Where is Osiris?!” Saint bellowed out, drawing his Pulse Rifle on the statue. 

“Lower your weapons,” Mara commanded. 

“You trust this thing?!”

“This thing ,” she motioned to the crystallized effigy before them. “I have an agreement. You need only to cooperate.”

“What…what is it?” Crow asked carefully as his eyes took in the sight of it. 

“I am Savathûn,” A new voice echoed over them, sending a chill down Crow’s spine. He hovered closer to Cayde, thankful for the male being here. Even if he didn’t particularly agree with Crow’s methods, he still supported him. And right now, he needed that more than anything. “The Witchqueen. Sister of Shapes. Deepest in the coven, etcetera, etcetera.”

“You’ve been masquerading as Osiris the entire time? I trusted you…you were my friend!”

“Oh, little bird…I still am.”

“You lied to me!” Crow cried out, his hands balled up into tight fists.

“Have I not had your best interests at heart the entire time? I kept you safe, brought you to the Last City, and kept others off your scent. I have protected you, guided you.”

His reply came out between gritted teeth. “ Stop …” 

“If that’s what you want, little bird.”

“I want the truth.”

“I was kind to you because I wanted to be. Because the truth hurts. You know that better than anyone, shrinking away from rumors of the man you used to be—”

“I’m not him.”

“How can you say that when you don’t even know who he is? I can show you. If the truth is what you really want, lay your hand on me.”

“Crow don’t!” Glint sprang out in front of his hand, stopping him from touching the effigy.

Savathûn’s laughter echoed through the halls, low and sinister. “Even your Ghost thinks you’re better off in the dark.” Stubbornly, Crow stepped into the triangular light surrounding Savathûn. He reached up and placed his hand on her, thousands of memories suddenly assaulting his senses all at once.

But one in particular held space, held time. Woven together like a tapestry that was now falling apart at the seams.

“Everything I did, I did for her.” But that wasn’t entirely true…there had been another reason.

Another person who had held his heart in his hands. That had eased all his hard edges, offered him words of comfort when everyone else held knives at his throat. His eyes met Cayde’s, seeing something in them that made him seethe. Pity .

“Crow, wait!” Glint called out for him.

“N-no! Don’t…don’t come any closer.” Without another word, he transmatted somewhere else.

Chapter Text

//LOCATION: TANGLED SHORE

//GHOSTLOG ENABLED

//UNANSWERED MESSAGES: 6

[PLAYBACK QUEUED]

MESSAGE 1/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Audio Duration: 00:08

“Ikora said you needed time. I get it. Just…stay safe out there.”

MESSAGE 2/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Audio Duration: 00:11

“Me again. I knew you wouldn’t pick up, but…thought I’d call anyway. Try not to get lost, alright?”

MESSAGE 3/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Ghost Uplink: Signal Weak — Transmission Stable

Audio Duration: 00:26

“Still not answering, huh? Just wanted to tell you…” 

(audible sigh, a muttered curse)

“I found a crow feather today. Been finding the damn things everywhere. I probably have enough to make a whole bird by now. Talk again soon.”

[Hidden Metadata]

- Keyword Flagged: "Crow Feather"

- Symbolic Recurrence Detected: Identity Trace

- Delivery Status: Delivered — Queued in Inbox

MESSAGE 4/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Audio Duration: 00:19

“I told myself I wouldn’t call you again. Looks like I have a shit track record.” 

(heavy sigh) 

“I’m tryin’ to give you space, I know you need it. But damn it…maybe…Maybe I need some things too?”

MESSAGE 5/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Ghost Uplink: Transmission Attempted Multiple Times — Delivered on Final Attempt

Audio Duration: 00:17

“I don’t hate you. Everybody makes mistakes, kid. And everybody, I mean everybody, pays for them. Don’t you think we’ve both paid enough?”

MESSAGE 6/6

Sender: ACEOFHEARTS

Recipient: THE_CROW

Ghost Uplink: Priority Tag / FINAL

Audio Duration: 00:43

“Alright. Last message. I mean it this time.”

(frustrated tone)

“I made this bet…with Uldren Sov. Told him he was going to be free one day from that length of chain around his neck. That when we met again, we wouldn’t be enemies." 

(Long pause)

"We’d be on the same side. And he’d be able to choose his own path.”

(Another long gap of silence)

“...I really thought I got that one right.”

[Hidden Metadata]

- Final Marker: YES

- Keyphrase Detected: ULDREN SOV

- Ghost Advisory: Recommend Playback — Pending Closure

_ _ _

“You’ve made him too good, Guardian.” Spider’s voice was a low growl, his glowing eyes narrowing. “He’s starting to think for himself.” 

“That was the point,” He heard Cayde say, the humor all but drained from his tone. Spider smiled, a dangerous edge to his expression. 

“I’ll need to ensure he stays loyal.” 

“He’s not a pet, Spider.” 

“No, but he’s mine.”

Crow’s fingers dug into his hair, trembling with the wave of emotions crashing over him. His knuckles turned white as his breath came in harsh, ragged bursts. “How…how could he keep so much from me?!” The words ripped from his throat, raw and bitter, as tears welled up, blurring his vision.

He had never thought he’d come back here; it was probably dangerous. But after everything…some part of him still found comfort in this place. To think his beginnings as a Guardian had been so meager. And now, now that he knew everything…He and Cayde hadn’t just known one another—they had been something so much more than the other Hunter had eluded.

“Crow…” Glint’s gentle voice drew him out of his thoughts, like a soft tether amidst the storm inside him. “Take a deep breath.”

“No—no, I don’t want to.” His voice was a desperate plea, hoarse and frayed, as though resisting the idea of calming down might somehow justify the intensity of his pain. 

“Crow,” Glint persisted, his tone firm but still gentle. “Take a deep breath, just focus on me.”  

Crow blinked through the haze of tears, slowly lifting his gaze toward his Ghost, his one constant, his anchor. Glint’s small light flickered in a soothing rhythm, and Crow latched onto it.

“Inhale…” Glint coaxed softly. Crow closed his eyes and pulled in a breath, though it was shaky and stuttered. “Now out.” Crow exhaled, his breath unsteady but obeying the instruction.

“Again,” Glint said, his voice even softer now. Crow repeated it, his breath slow, deliberate, though the burn of his tears remained. The weight pressing on his chest lightened, just a little.  

“That’s good. You’re doing good, Crow.” Glint’s tone remained constant, like a lifeline in the dark. They continued this a few more times until Crow’s pulse no longer hammered in his ears, and the suffocating grip of his emotions loosened. He sat back, shoulders sagging under the lingering weight of his grief, but the immediate threat of being overwhelmed had passed.

“He kept everything from me, Glint,” Crow whispered, his voice barely audible but thick with pain. “Everything.” His mind raced back to every conversation, every sidelong glance, every moment Cayde had shared something but never enough.

Glint hovered closer, dimming slightly. “Yes…that’s true,” he said, his tone filled with empathy. “But Crow…ask yourself this: If the roles were reversed, would you have told yourself?” He let the question hang in the air.

Crow flinched as if the inquiry struck him physically. His fists clenched again, but this time not in anger. He didn’t want to think about it—the idea of holding such truths from himself. Could he have done it? Would he have done it? He hated the idea…but when he searched deep inside, he didn’t know the answer.

“Truly think about it,” Glint pressed gently, his voice a steady current amidst the wreckage. Crow looked down, feeling the knot in his chest flare up once more, but this time quieter, less consuming.

“I…I don’t know,” Crow murmured hesitantly. Because maybe, just maybe, he would have kept the truth hidden too.

****

Cayde

‘Do you ever ponder the before? Ot that number etched into your ‘flesh’? Do you see yourself in your dreams?’

Cayde looked around at the sprawling green gardens and the twilight river were just how he remembered them. The old Tower, overgrown with foliage, parts of the ground cracked with Light spilling out. Maybe he should have thought a little more about wanting to return to this place…the space between nothing and everything. 

What was he doing back here again? 

Up ahead, a dark figure was waiting by the railing, looking out at the vast land that lay ahead. That familiar oily sky hung above, seeming untouched even by time. 

Carefully, Cayde approached the figure, but…he knew who it was before he got a good look at his face. “Hey, Side Shave…it’s good to see you again.”

“Hm…” The Prince looked at him, his eyes now a different fire. Instead of their hot orange, they were a soft white, refracting everything inside them. Cayde swore he saw whole galaxies in them. “I didn’t think you’d miss me.” He replied softly.

“Oh come on…you don’t mean that.” Cayde leaned against the rail too as he faced him, taking in the sight of Uldren. “I never got to tell you—“

“Don’t say it. Not to me. I’m gone, Cayde. You need to accept that.”

“But…”

“You know I speak the truth. Know that he knows the past…my past, how much longer do you think you can keep dodging him?”

Cayde looked away at this, hating that Uldren was right. “I told him…”

“A partial truth, at best. To satisfy his curiosity. It is not enough. An old foe has begun pulling at the tethers of his memories. Don’t you think he should hear it from you instead?”

“You askin’ me to lay all my cards on the table again? Coz I did that. With you. Look where it got me.” 

“If you care about him, the way you once cared for me—“

“Once? I still do! That’s the whole problem!” He threw up his arms in exasperation. “You know, it seems to me I got the short end of the stick here. And you got off scott fucking free.”

“No…he is paying for my misdeeds…Guardians have hunted him, killed him because they look into his eyes, all they see is the memory of me. Crow must break the chains that once bound me.”

“What are you doing here anyway? In this place?” 

“I’m…unsure,” Uldren said hesitantly, his eyes drawn to the kaleidoscope of colors in the sky. “I don’t even know what this place is.”

“Well…” Cayde started to answer as he drifted a little closer to the Prince. His chest ached just at the sight of him, he was still beautiful, even in death. “When I was losing my mind, a projection of you told me this was the space between nothing and everything…you showed me that we were more alike than I cared to admit at the time.”

“I see…” Uldren said thoughtfully. “You have not processed my passing.”

“How could I?” He swallowed thickly. “You’re staring me in the face every day and yet it ain’t you I’m looking at.”

“It is not that…”

“What the hell else could it be?” Cayde found himself frowning at the accusation.

“Words left unsaid,” Uldren answered as he turned back to him, those swirling white eyes holding all of Sol within them. “Not just yours, but mine too.”

“Yeah, well, it doesn’t matter much. You’re dead and…I missed my chance.”

“I loved you, Cayde.”

“Not enough to make your own fate, though. Not enough to take on a new purpose. You were always going to choose Mara in the end. That’s why you died, that’s why you will always die. I was just too stupid to admit it.” Cayde inhaled slowly, going quiet for a long moment before he spoke again. “I drove myself damn near insane trying to save you.”

“I know…”

“Do you? Do you understand what I did for you? What I’m still doing?”

“I am sorry…truly, for all the pain I’ve caused you. For everything that happened…if I could do it all again—”

“You’d do the same damn thing.” Cayde finished for him, his tone holding an edge to it. The anger roiling inside him didn’t last for long, though. 

“You should tell Crow how you feel…you never got the chance to tell me.”

“I can’t!” He exclaimed. “He’s…and I’m…” Cayde sighed, words failing him. “I have to let him walk his own path—even if it's not the one I’m on.” A warm calloused hand fell on his own, intertwining their fingers. 

“You are on the same path now…” Uldren’s words wrapped around him, seeming to bring all the broken pieces of him back together. When Cayde looked at him again, the Prince had a somber knowing smile on his face.  “You are making your own fate, Cayde. As you have always done. Tell all of Sol how you made the once famously broody Prince of the Awoken smile.” 

“Yeah…alright.” He pulled Uldren into a tight hug, as tight as he could. “See you starside.”

****

“Hey, Cayde,” Crow called softly. Cayde’s head instantly went up, his chest aching at the sight of the male again. He had missed him when he had gone running off. He approached with care, unsure of how Crow would react now that he knew everything. “I’m sorry.”

The words hung between them, weighted with a thousand other meanings, but there was only one that mattered.

“I’m not sorry,” Cayde replied, a bittersweet smile tugging on his lips as relief flooded through him. So Crow had survived, he knew all of the things his past self had done, and yet…

He was still Crow. 

Crow stepped closer, pressing the back of his hand to Cayde’s. He returned the gesture without hesitation, warmth spreading through his wiring. 

“I have something for you…” Crow pulled a familiar-looking blade from its sheath, presenting it to Cayde. “Turns out you got that one right after all.” 

He took the blade with his free hand, his reflection staring back at him when he turned it over. “I should have told you, Crow…I should have told you everything.”

“No…” Crow stopped him, their eyes meeting. There it was again, that hard, stubborn gaze. The same one Cayde had fallen in love with so long ago. He would choose it over and over again. No matter how many realities they went through, no matter what he suffered or how many Final Deaths he had to face. He would choose to do it again. “No, it's okay, I understand now.”

“Well, I want to say it anyway.” Cayde sheathed the knife with the others on his belt and took Crow’s hand into his as he spoke. “I love you, Crow…have since before I found you on Reef. I loved you even as Uldren…and there is nothin’ in all of Sol that would ever keep from you.”

Crow’s eyes widened a little at the confession. “Really? I thought…when Savathun showed me everything—well, I worried it wasn’t me you wanted to be with.”

“That couldn’t be further from the truth…” He reached forward and palmed Crow’s cheek, his thumb stroking along the marking there. “I’ve had a hard time accepting his death, it's true. But it’s like I said before, you’re everything Uldren Sov could never be.” Cayde leaned forward and pressed his lips against Crow’s, soft and sweet. “And you’re everything I could ever want,” he whispered when he pulled away.