Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You'd been filling out job applications all week, hoping something good would come up. Your current job was awful, after all- your boss would scream at her husband, the guests, and you, in that order. And the guests were so demanding! You'd had someone send back a plate of food for having "overly round potatoes." As you leafed through job vacancies in the newspaper, you just kept applying, until something caught your eye.

Plucky assistant needed!

Must be good at fetching and carrying

Salary: 300k a year

No prior experience required. Will need to be able to relocate to New Mexico

To apply, please send CV and Telephone number to:

F. Pauling

Mann Corp

Teufort

New Mexico

69420

300k? That was more than what a doctor made! You immediately signed up, knowing nothing about Mann Corp other than it had something to do with gravel. Ah, well. It was good money, who could resist that opportunity?

****

A few days later, you got a phone call.

"Are you y/n? It's Mr Pauling from Mann Corp."

"Yeah, that's me." You said.

"Congratulations! You've got the job! Well, nobody else was desperate enough to apply." He replied. "I'll come to pick you up tomorrow at noon, as you've got to take some training."

"Alright!" You replied. "Do I need to bring anything?"

"No, just make sure all your limbs are intact." He said, before putting the phone down. Weird! But hey, work was work. The next day, you were waiting outside your house, when a handsome young guy with glasses and a purple sweatshirt showed up on a scooter.

"I'm Mr Pauling, y/n. Hop on and I'll take you to my bosses." He said, tossing you the spare helmet. You spluttered along the road on the little vespa until you reached an empty warehouse in an industrial estate.

"I need to warn you, my boss is... A lot. And The Administrator is fairly intimidating, just don't show any fear because that'll encourage him." You were absolutely baffled, but as you walked into the warehouse, you were even more baffled. A nerf gun sat on a table next to a box of foam darts and a mannequin, and two people were sat on folding chairs staring at you. One was an older guy with a white streak in, wearing a purple suit. The other was a huge woman with really hairy legs, muscled arms, and a hat with crocodile teeth on it.

"Boss, this is the new recruit for our Backup role." Mr Pauling said, gesturing to you. "She had absolutely no qualifications, so she's ideal."

"Greetings." The older man said with a sneer. "I am the Administrator, but you may call me sir."

"Yes, sir." You said, instantly disliking him. He looked like a Scooby Doo villain and looked down his nose at everyone.

"The name's Sheila Hale, and YOU- have got to prove yourself." The massive woman said with a Aussie accent. "See that nerf gun? Load it."

You did so.

"Now throw it at the dummy."

You followed her orders.

"Fucking brilliant!" She bit open a beer bottle, and downed it in one.

"So, when does my training start?" You asked.

"You just completed it." The Administrator said. "Pauling! Have her sedated, and taken to TFort. Send her belongings with her. It's time for her to meet the Mercs."

"Wait, what?" You said.

"I'm sorry, y/n." The assistant sighed, before clapping a chloroform-soaked rag over your nose, knocking you out."

****

"Y'all think she's awake?"

"Nae, the lass is sleeping...."

"Ey bozo! Wake up!"

"Honestly, Jennifer, some days I regret sleeping with your father..."

"Mmmph!"

"Tiny lady is... Assistant?"

"Ja, her role is "Ze Backup."

"So she hands out bullets? Like a TRUE American!"

"Shut up, ya daft cunt, she's waking up!"

You opened your eyes, to find that you were lying on a sofa that appeared to be made of multiple car seats badly sewn together. The room had a TV in one corner with a coat hanger for an aerial, and a low table covered in empty cans of Bonk and a half-eaten sandwich atop a copy of War and Peace. Surrounding you were 9 people, eight being female and one being indeterminable.

"Is this TFort? The guy in the purple sweater said I was your "Backup" role." You said groggily.

"STAND TO ATTENTION, MAGGOT!" Yelled a woman in an army helmet. You immediately did so, and she circled you.

"Your role, cupcake, is to carry around ammo rounds, and reload us! Whenever our guns are empty, you fill 'em up! Understand?"

"Uh, yes, ma'am! But what are you fighting over?"

"Gravel." Interjected a woman with a hard hat under her arm. She was wearing goggles, and had a bit of a beehive, tied back with a bandana. "But don't y'all worry about it. Just hand out ammo and clean up after yourself in the fort, and we're all peachy keen."

"Don't touch the bonk in the fridge, toots." Added a skinny chick with a red t shirt and beige hair in two messy ponytails.

"But what if I get shot?" You asked. A booming laugh came from a huge woman with a Babushka scarf over her short brown locks, her massive chest and stomach heaving as she guffawed.

"Leetle lady does not need to worry! Heavy is shot every day we fight, but Heavy always heals. No man is smart enough to outsmart bullet..."

"But I am no man." Said another woman in a white coat. She had black curly hair in a bun, glasses, and a slightly mad stare, like Nurse Ratched. "I vill heal you, easy as pie, Nein? Just scream for Medic like everyone else on zis team does constantly, and I vill heal you."

"So I just have to hand out ammo. Right, got it. But one more thing... Where are all your husbands?" You asked. There was a pause, and everyone burst out laughing.

"Ach! The lassie thinks ah'm married!" A woman with one eye howled with laughter.

"We are all... Attracted to the fairer sex in some day. Depending on the time of day, us French go either way... But none of us want husbands, non?" A seductive voice purred. From out the shadows stepped the Spy, her face concealed with cat's eye sunglasses and a beret, a cigarette in a holder clutched between two gloves fingers.

"That's roight, Sheila. Oi'm bisexual myself, but Miss Hale didn't want us running off and having babies. So we're all into birds here. Well... I've got no clue about Pyro." The Sniper stank of piss and campfire ash, and she had long straggly brown hair.

"Hudda Hudda!" Added the only person who hadn't talked, an anonymous figure in a fireproof suit

"Pyro says they like to play with Lego and eat mash." Engie translated. "Anyway, welcome to TFort, missy! Glad you can be here!" Heavy helped you carry your stuff up to your room, during which, you were mulling over an idea in your head. Eight sapphic ladies, you were sapphic too, and you're all in a fortress in the middle of nowhere (bar the weird little town of Teufort)? Who knows- perhaps you could get up to a awful lot of fun here...

Chapter Text

It was your first day on the battlefield, and you were pretty nervous. You'd been kitted out with a bulletproof vest and a helmet, alongside a big backpack full of ammo. Your "melee" weapon- duct tape- was on your belt. All you had to do was reload people's guns, taul them for long enough so they wouldn't run out of ammo, and not get shot. Easy peasy simple pimple. Just don't think about how hot these Mercs are, or stare at the BLU team, or think about... Gah, get it together!

"You ok, toots?" Scout asked, drawing her baseball bat. "Don't sweat it, you'll be fine."

"I'm ok." You said, biting your lower lip. You were right next to Jenny, and you could smell her- bonk, bubblegum and fried chicken grease, covered in a sea of men's body spray. She was jogging on the spot, eyes fixed on the doorway.

Thirty seconds until match begins!

"Ready? It's capture the flag today, doll." Engie asked. Sure, everyone here was a madwoman who revelled in murder, but at least Dot was polite about it.

"Yah'd best stay with the wee Scout, lassie." Demolass slurred, as she'd been drinking before battle again.

"Correct! Follow her lead! It's the AMERICAN way!" Soldier yelled. You had no real weapons to fight with, so you'd have to follow someone whilst handing out extra ammo, reducing their need to reload.

Match begins now!

The doors rolled open, and you spilled out into the sawmill.

****

Scout was fast, so you were a few paces behind her. Your team had agreed to send Heavy and Medic after the briefcase as the two of them made a sort of invincible mobile tank, and you sprinted after the Bostonian.

"Need a reload!" Sniper yelled. You grabbed one of her ammo packs, and chucked it up to her, as she was on the roof.

"Ta!"

You swerved, keeping a tail on Jenny as she lunged at the BLU team and darted away, fast as a barracuda. The BLU engineer caught sight of her, but she reached for her shotgun, and sent the Texan back to respawn.

"GRIGORI NEEDS THE FEEDING!" Heavy yelled.

"That means her damn gun's empty. Reload!" Scout translated. You chucked a bandolier of bullets to her, and Scout whacked them with her bat, delivering them to the huge Siberian powerhouse.

"You're a good throw, toots! Hey, do you play baseball?" Scout jabbered away as you dashed after her.

"I've never played it!"

"After this match, I'm takin' you down to the baseball field in Teufort! You can throw, I'll bat. And do ya like fried chicken?"

"Sure!"

"No way! That's my favourite food! Don't tell me ya also like Tammy Jones."

"He's a Gent is my favourite song!"

"Holy shit! We're like, besties!"

"JENNY!" The BLU spy had snuck up behind her, knife bared, and you acted on instinct. You dodged between the two of them as the Spy lunged, and her blade got stuck in your backpack.

"Fuck you, chucklehead! Go back ta spawn, ya cheese-eating surrender-lover!" Scout emptied her gun into the Spy's face, and laughed.

"Your damn backpack saved me!"

"It's no biggie."

"Toots, that is a huge biggie. I owe ya a can of bonk!"

"Enough chattering, MAGGOTS! Shield the fat one and the crazy one! They're carrying back the briefcase!" Soldier screamed, before rocket-jumpimg away. Pyro made up the tail as you kept Heavy's gun full, and Scout darted ahead, bashing enemies on the head with her bat.

Match completed! RED team wins!

****

The whole base was in a good mood as you headed back in the RED Bread van, and as they filed into the RED fort, you and Scout slipped aside.

"Do you have a car? Teufort's quite a way from here." You said.

"Even better!" Jenny reached behind a rock, and pulled out a BMX.

"I'll pedal, you can stand on the pegs." She said. You laughed, but honestly, the BMX suited her. She clipped her little portable radio onto the handlebar, and as she saddled up you stood on the pegs, and she started to pedal down the dusty road to Teufort. Tammy Jones blared out the radio as you rode into the afternoon, reaching Teufort by 4pm. It was a dusty desert town, and the baseball field was more of a baseball desert. Scout pulled her bat from the holster on her back, and yanked a few baseballs out the pockets of her cargo shorts. Her flat tummy was exposed due to her t-shirt being tied in a knot (she liked to taunt the BLU team by running around with her abdomen undefended, to Medic's annoyance). 

"Alright, toss me one." She said. You lobbed a baseball at her, and she batted it expertly, before dashing off around the field.

"Oh yeah! Jenny scores for the Boston red Sox! I'm makin' my papa proud!" She yelled.

"You're such a tomboy!" You grinned, loving her chaotic energy.

"I had to be. I had seven older brothers- and all of them were massive geeks. Couldn't punch their way out a paper bag! So I trained myself to be fast, and beat up the chucklefucks who'd beat up my brothers."

"That's cute."

"I ain't cute. Grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and y/n, I hurt people. But I don't mind ya calling me cute." She said with a wink.

"Now, throw me another one!"

****

As the sun set, you finished up your game, and Jenny gestures to the cheapo chicken place down the road.

"Ya like chicken?"

"You had me at chicken." You said. Weird pick-up line, but hey, it worked. You got a six-piece bucket to share, and some crit-a-cola.

"This has been a great day, best I've had in months." You said. "Sure, everything in this town smells weird and there's a mutant raccoon problem, but I like spending time with you here."

"Day ain't over yet, toots." Scout replied. You went pink, then smirked.

"Well, Jenny, when we get back- I might just have to reward you properly for this evening."

You'd never seen someone cycle a BMX so fast, whilst bolting down the remains of her chicken dinner, but Scout was a woman of many talents. You could only hope that TFort had sound proof walls, because you'd be needing them.

Chapter Text

The base was dark and quiet, so you and Jenny snuck through the corridors, shushing one another like a comedy duo. Her cleats made a little clicking noise on every step, but you managed to get back to her room without anybody seeing you. Scout's room was an absolute tip- her bed was unmade, baseball posters and Tammy Jones merchandise littered the walls, and the floor was covered in empty bonk cans (Christ, how much did she drink?) and old clothes. A chunky TV and games console sat in the corner, with a sports bra strewn over the top. The whole room stunk of the body spray she always wore, the stinky sort usually worn by teenage boys and sad adults, with a slight sickliness to it- probably due to the half-eaten Boston cream doughnuts she'd left on a plate on her nightstand. She had some unused dumbbells in the corner, next to a dartboard with photos of Spy on it.

"Welcome to casa del fuck!" Jenny announced. "Close the door, or the smell will escape."

You closed the door behind you, and you and Jenny immediately pressed your lips to each other's. She smelled of chicken grease and sweat on top of her usual scent, but you didn't mind. However, upon noticing your sniffing, she went as red as her shirt.

"Jeez, sorry, toots... Guess I smell a bit, huh?"

"I don't mind. How about we share a shower if you wanna freshen up?" You teased. Her eyes lit up, and she immediately tugged you into her en-suite. It was fairly clean, with several cans of body spray on the shelf, and tangles of her short beige hair in the sink. Jenny turned on the shower, and glanced at you with sultry eyes.

"Take your shirt off, toots." She grinned. You did so, as she pulled off her top too. She had a tattoo of Tammy Jones over her heart, and some slight, wiry muscle. Jenny had fairly small breasts, and a little trail of beige hair travelling down from her navel, below her waistband.

"Ya like what ya see?" She teased, posing.

"Jenny, you're a work of art." You replied. She grinned, showing off her slightly crooked teeth, and removed the rest of her clothing. She had long legs, a fairly flat butt, and her pussy was untrimmed but not wild.

"Aw, toots! You ain't half bad yourself, ya know? Now come on, let's wash up." You got into the shower, feeling the hot water pelt down on you, and took a shuddery sigh at the heat.

"Ooh, this is good..." You gasped.

"Yeah? It's about to get better."

Jenny kissed you again, rubbing your shoulders and hips lovingly, as if she wanted to memorise your body based on touch alone. She leaned down, and started to suck on your nipples, making you gasp. Her tongue ran over the pebbles bumps, suckling slightly before moving over to the next one, hungrily slurping away at your breasts.

"Oh Jenny!"

"Heh! Ya like that? That's right, moan for me, baby. Make all them pretty noises." You kept moaning as her hand slid lower and lower, pressing a finger to your clitoris. You wanted to return the favour, so you started to gently stroke her pussy lips, spreading her open with two fingers and pressing a thumb to her clit. She gasped softly, and you smirked, working a finger into her.

"Aw, are you thirsty for me, Jenny? Am I your first?" You teased. She scoffed, and grabbed your wrist.

"Shut up and scissor me." She said.

"What?"

"Ya know... Scissoring? Rubbing our cunts together?"

Ohhh! That had a name?

"Sure, I'm down." You said, sitting down and opening your legs to her. Scout awkwardly budged up next to you on the shower floor, and straddled you, pressing her wet pussy against your own. You ground on her and ohhh sweet lord, it felt incredible. Your first time with a girl! It felt so good, and the rub of her wetness against your clit was electrifying.

"Fuck, toots! Gonna cum!" She gasped. You felt her squeeze against you, her wet cunt gushing all over you, and you groaned as you joined her. Orgasm hit you hard, and you soaked her pussy, gumming her hairs together with your slick.

"Oh Jenny!" You wailed.

"Shit, y/n, that was amazin'." She gasped, reaching up and turning the water off. She huddled up next to you on the shower floor, putting an arm around you and letting her wet hair flop on your skin.

"There's only one problem, though..."

"Yeah?"

"We've only got one towel!"

Chapter Text

You'd just gotten back from another battle, but your work wasn't done yet. You'd promised Tara that you'd help her put together more explosives, as that was technically your job as the group's "Gopher"- fetching and carrying. The Demolass has a desk in her room where she'd develop her explosives. She'd apparently "memorised that damned book Merasma carries around", so she'd just create bombs from memory. Most people assumed she was winging it, but you didn't get that feeling.

"Ach, can yeh get a sack o'gunpowder from th'cellar?" The Scotswoman said, adjusting her headband to keep her afro curls out her face. Most of her room was dedicated to her work table and several scribbled notes pinned to the walls, alongside a wine fridge humming in the corner, full of whiskey. Her bed was shoved into the corner, and the window was permanently grimy from all the gunpowder in the air. You had to wear a respirator when you were in her room, or you'd be coughing up little explosions all week.

"Sure, Tara." You said, heading downstairs. You got the sack of powder, when an envelope on the table caught your eye.

"Is letter for Demolass." Heavy said, idly cleaning Grigori, her beloved minigun. You picked it up, and carried it upstairs.

"There's a letter for you, Tara. It's got "urgent" scribbled on it?" You said. She ripped it open, and her eye widened when two plane tickets to Scotland and a letter fell out.

Tara

I am writing to invite you to the DeGroot clan's Hogmanay celebrations. There are two tickets, as I am expecting a +1 from you. And make sure he's nice.

Sincerely

Yer mam

Tara had gone very quiet, clutching the letter in her fist.

"Um, Tar?" You asked.

"Aye?"

"What's up?"

"Nothin'! Ah'm just... Thinking of who tae take. I cannae take John again, mam would complain- she wants a heir from me. She's nae keen on me liking the lasses. And I'd nae trust any of these other dummies at a fancy event like the DeGroot hogmanay."

"What if I go with you?" You offered. She raised an eyebrow, and patted you on the shoulder.

"Yer serious?"

"Yes, I'll go if you want. What's the dress code? I have a little black dress in my wardrobe."

"Y/n, yer a star. Mah family- it's a wee bit complicated, I cannae explain, but ah'm glad yer offering to stay with me. It makes me happy, ye ken? Happier than when I blew up th'royal family. Dinnae believe the papers telling yeh they "moved tae a council house in Milton Keynes."

"So that's why they got a robo-queen for the tourists..." You said, pondering on the fact that you'd be going to hogmanay with a one-eyed female guy fawkes wannabe with mummy issues and a drinking problem.

The plane touched down at Edinburgh airport, and you peeled off your eye mask. Tara yawned next to you, having drunk several mini-bottles of whiskey on the flight. After going through customs and picking up your cases, you scanned the busy foyer, before seeing a driver holding a card with "Tara DeGroot +1" written on it.

"Your mother has requested you're driven straight to the castle home of Clan DeGroot." The driver said, opening the door to a land rover. You both climbed in, with Tara looking sweaty and anxious.

"Tara?"

"Ah'm fine! Jest... Nerves." She said, gripping her knees. Feck, she needed a drink. Her eye was twitching, and she tried not to look out the window as the land rover left Edinburgh, and drove up through the moors, up to Loch Ness. A massive castle sat on a hill overlooking the loch, and the portcullis was raised to let in the car.

"Tara!" A voice cried.

An old woman with grey straggly hair hobbled up on a stick, a maid directing her as she was blind.

"Did ye bring a fella?" She asked.

"Um, hello ma'am. Tara brought me as a friend." You said, aware you weren't a guy. The old woman sniffed, shaking her head.

"Honestly! How are ye meant to carry on the family name if ye only like women?" She grumbled.

"Ah've got brothers to do that, mam. And yeh abandoned me as a wee baby!"

"Och, logistics! Get in, you'll catch your death out here." Tara's mother snapped. New Year's Eve was tomorrow, and you were already counting the days until you got to go home, as you couldn't stand seeing Tara so miserable.

As you walked upstairs to your room, you passed dozens of paintings. The little card next to them explained that the DeGroots were descendants of a North African Roman legion who'd abandoned the Roman army to marry into the local Celtic tribes. They were also apparently the inspiration for Shakespeare's Macbeth, and the inventors of shortbread.

"Ah've got so much tae fuckin' live up to. They're nae happy with just me explosions." Tara spat, dropping her case on the bed. "And where's the fecking scrumpy?"

*****

Hogmanay came along, and the castle was flooded with the rich and famous. The men were all in highland dress or black tie, and the women all attempted to outdo each other with lengths of silk, satin and diamonds. You were in just a little black dress and some silver-plated jewellery, and Tara looked stunning in a long black velvet dress, with the clan's tartan as a sash. She took a deep breath, and headed down to the party with you at her side. It was funny- you were in a sea of people, but she'd never really felt so lonely. What if...

"Tara?" You said. Her eye flickered over to you, and it was like cold water on a burn. Ah, y/n... Something about you just made things feel right.

"Tara! Stand up straight!" Her mother spat.

"Go to hell, you old bat." You replied without thinking. The Demolass cracked up laughing, and even the servants giggled.

"Y/n, lassie... Shall we ditch this party? Let's have our own wee hogmanay. Ah've got the perfect place tae do it." Tara asked, liberating a bottle of scotch from the bar.

"You read my mind." You grinned, following her. As you left, you purloined a big tin of shortbread, and stepped out into the chilly highland air.

Chapter Text

You and Tara walked out the castle gates, and she led you up a path on the hill. It was a dark, misty night, with a full moon hanging overhead, and soft winds ruffling the heather. As you picked your way up the path in your sensible party heels, a dark shape loomed into view. It was a bothy, one of the numerous little empty cottages that dotted the Scottish Highlands, designed for travellers to spend the night if they needed it. The little stone hut overlooked loch Ness itself, which was as smooth and silvery as a Venetian glass mirror.

"I used tae come here as a bairn, when it all got too much, ye ken?" Tara said as she undid the latch and headed in. It was empty, and she started searching around for a box of matches.

"There's some wood and kindling out back, we can make ourselves a fire so we dinnae freeze tae death." She said.

"How often would you come here?" You asked, fetching logs as Tara started screwing up an old newspaper to make kindling.

"Aboot twice a week. I jest... I jest wish I was enough fer me family. They should be happy, ah'm a Demolass fer feck's sake, but it's nae enough for them! I feel like a wee dancing bear at a circus." She sighed, slumping in front of the fire as it started to crackle.

"Ah know, yeh just think ah'm a funny drunk. And ah hate tae be all maudlin like this. But it hurts, aye?" You knew that you were seeing a side to Tara that she didn't let out much, a softer side, an insecure one. You took her hand by the firelight, and looked into her eye.

"Fuck 'em all, Tara. We'd have lost to BLU team dozens of times if it wasn't for you. What's that saying?  Blood of the covenant is thicker than water of the womb."

"Aye, yer right. Feck all of 'em! And all this talk of liquid is making me a wee bit thirsty."

She held up the whiskey bottle, the tinted glass flickering in the firelight.

"Spot 'o drink?"

It was soon eleven o'clock, and you and Tara were pleasantly sloshed, eating shortbread and telling ghost stories. You didn't drink too much, as you had to keep the fire fed, but you were just tipsy enough to feel funny and happy. Tara sat against the wall, not caring that the whitewash rubbed off on her dress, and laughed.

"And that's how Soldier ended up with a chipmunk in her hair and twenty dollars poorer!" She laughed loudly, and you joined in.

"Ach, me, Dot and John... We used tae have something going on. It's just a fling, ye ken?"

"You're friends with benefits?" You asked.

"Aye, that's the word. But we're nae a closed group, we just shag whoever we want."

"You can shag me if you want." You teased. Tara's eye glittered, and she leaned over to you.

"Oh, aye?" She smirked. You couldn't deny it, you found Tara attractive, and you had the feeling she felt likewise.

"Well, how aboot ye let the Demolass take care o'yeh?" She asked. You sat next to her, and started to kiss, running your fingers through her hair.

"Aye... That's it, good lass..." She moaned softly. She tasted of whiskey and smelled like cordite, which was oddly aphrodisiac. You reached for the zip on her dress, tugging it down and sliding the velvet to her thighs. Tara didn't wear a bra underneath, and she wasn't wearing panties either, just stockings.

"What? VPL is nae classy." She grinned. You hitched up your dress and unclipped your bra, before kissing her again, feeling her nipples soften under your touch and her tongue tease yours. She slid a hand into your knickers, teasing your clit. Your pussy was already wet for her, and you gave a soft squeak.

"Yer doing good, lass. How about some 69?" She whispered in your ear, biting your lobe. You nodded, whimpering softly, and Tara tossed a blanket down onto the cobbles. You lay down on it, legs open, and she started to hungrily suck your tits.

"Tara!"

"That's it, say mah name."

"Taraaaa!"

"Ach, good girl!" The Demolass stood over you, and crouched over your face, pressing her pussy to your lips. You opened your mouth and started to hungrily eat her out, tongue swiping her entrance as you sucked her clit. She moaned, before leaning forward and swiping her tongue along your cunt.

"Good girl, so wet fae me." She smirked, before pressing her face to your cunt and hungrily starting to slurp away. You were so wet and juicy, and she loved to gobble your pussy juices, eating you out like she was starving and you were a banquet. You kept tongue fucking her, hands tight on her hips as she swirled around your clit, lubricating you with her saliva. You tasted so good!

"Tara, Tara, I'm cumming!" You cried, feeling your legs twitch and hips shake the way they always did when you were close. You gave a muffled squeal as you came, soaking her face, and Tara gave a loud gasp as you felt her cum. She didn't really squirt, but she twitched and fluttered on you, and her keening cries were music to your ears.

"Oh feck lass... Ah'll be glad tae do that again sometime." She said, sliding off and sitting next to you. Just then, you were lit up with purple light. Peering out the window, you saw fireworks popping in the sky from the castle. It must be new year already!"

"Happy new Year, Tara!" You smiled, glad to have spent the first few seconds of the new year with her sitting on your face. She hummed the bars to "Auld Lang Syne" as she pulled the blanket around you, and the two of you watched the fireworks burst into the darkness of the sky.

Chapter Text

You were tailing Engineer today, keeping her sentries and dispensers stocked up. You were amazed by the complexity of these things, but you weren't surprised, as Dot had 11 PhDs after all. Still, you were essentially a walking dispenser, filling up people's guns for them. Dot circled her contraptions, holding her wrench in one hand and her shotgun in another. She may look short and stocky, but Dot was justas dangerous as the rest of the Mercs.

"Need a reload!" Sniper yelled. You chucked her a clip of bullets, and she clipped them into her rifle.

"Keep it up, y/n!" Engineer yelled. You tailed after Soldier, loading her rocket launcher, and the patriot catapulted herself up into the sky. Demolass popped out of a teleporter, and charged towards the BLU team, yelling like Wilhelmina Wallace charging into battle.

"Stay on the point!" Spy shouted, before darting into the ruckus. Heavy and Scout were holding the point, and Engie just ran back and forth, keeping her machines oiled and running.

"Need a dispenser here!"

"Need a sentry here!"

"Put dispenser here!"

"Engineer!"

"Engineer!"

Her head! She already had a headache, but this was just making it worse! She shot the BLU Pyro in the face, and breathed a sigh as RED victory was declared.

"Dot, you ok?" You asked. Her emotions were raging, her mood was swinging like a fairground ride, and her head, her head!

"Just... Stahp!" She snapped suddenly, storming off. "You're doin' my goshdanged head in!"

What was all that about?

****

"And how are ve doing, Frau Conagher?"

Dot sat in the medbay as Medic scanned her, checking for clots and tumours.

"Well, I've been getting headaches. I'm a bit irritable sometimes, and I ain't getting horny as much."

"Ja, those are all typical side effects of HRT. Physically, however, jou are very healthy. Your body is changing well, and are jou feeling happier?"

"You know, doc, I am. The headaches are shitty, but I've never felt better bein' who I am! Still... I sure was rude to y/n today."

"I am sure she vill understand, ja? And here's your restock auf oestrogen. One a day, with breakfast, as usual." Medic handed Engineer a few boxes of pills, and the Texan smiled.

"You're a lifesaver, doc." This seemed to be the only aspect in which Medic was a genuine kind, caring heart, not a crazy mad scientist.

"It's the least I can do. Now get out before I see how many extra kidneys I can put into one person!"

You were on the couch in the rec room when Dot walked up to you.

"Hey y/n? I'm sorry 'bout yelling at you like that."

"It's ok, Dot. You were probably just stressed from the battle." You said, putting your book down.

"Y'see, I... I ain't like other women, y/n. I wasn't really born like the rest of ya were, and I'm on these here hormones that the doc gives me. It's great for me, but it sort of gives me mood swings." Dot didn't know how to just say this to you, as she didn't know how people would react to her breaking this news to everyone. She hadn't told the other Mercs until a few months ago, as it had been between her and Medic. Hell, her family had been OK with it as long as she kept inventing stuff, but there was always that fear.

"I don't know what you mean, Engie." You said.

"Y/n, do you know what transgender means?" She asked. You pondered, before remembering a newspaper article you'd read.

"You mean like that US soldier who became a beauty queen?" You asked.

"Yeah, like that. I'm trans, y/n. And it's my hormones that were givin' me a headache." She said.

"Ok, cool!" You smiled.

"You ain't got a problem?"

"No. You are who you are, Dot. And I'm not going to stop liking you because you're trans." The engineer went pink, taking off her hard hat and lowering her gaze.

"Shoot, sugar, y'all really make me a happy gal!"

"I didn't know Medic specialised in that sort of thing." You said.

"Ja! I vas a prodigy at ze Institut für sexualwissenschaft! I vas just a teenager, but I studied under Dr Hirschfield himself."

"I thought you were a battlefield Medic!" You exclaimed.

"Nein, ze MANN corporation couldn't find any battlefield medics for ze RED team, so zey went with ze only one they could get! If any auf you wish to transition, I shall do my utmost duty to bring jou gender euphoria, and fulfil my Hippocratic oath."

What a nice woman. She's surely just misunderstood. You thought.

"But if you vant ze appendix or tonsils out, I shall be ruthless! Anaesthesia is for ze cowards! I have no medical license and I never vas allowed to attend university, so I shall use organs as my canvas and mein saw as my paintbrush!" She screamed, and any idea of her being sweet disappeared from your mind.

Well, at least she stuck to her Hippocratic oath on one occasion. You still dreaded seeing her for a paper cut though.

Later that evening, Dot was making dinner. She'd offered to cook tonight, so she'd had a few racks of beef ribs on her homemade smoker, seasoned with chilli and paprika. A barbecue sauce bubbled on the stove, and cornbread and macaroni cheese baked in the oven. Spy walked in, and sniffed.

"Ribs? Honestly, those are offal, food for dogs." She said.

"Y'all don't have to eat any." Engie grinned sarcastically.

"Ugh! Fine!" The French woman slinked out as you were chopping cabbage for coleslaw, and Engie tapped her chin with her mechanical hand.

"Hmmm... I'm thinkin' we need a dessert here." She said. Your eyes flickered to the bananas left on the side, and Dot snapped her fingers.

"Great idea, y/n! Go get some wafers and puddin' mix out the cupboard, I'm gonna make us some banana puddin'." She sliced fruit and whipped cream as you finished the slaw, and by the time the ribs were done, she'd made a splendid banana pudding.

"Come and get it, y'all!" She hollered as you set up the table.

"Aw boy, chow time!"

"Hudda Hudda!"

"Finally, some AMERICAN FOOD!" Soldier yelled. Spy had made onion soup yesterday, and she hadn't enjoyed it one bit. In fact, she'd come out in hives, as John Doe was allergic to French, Italian, Spanish, Mexican, German, Indian, Russian, Chinese, Japanese, Ethiopian, Brazilian, British, Levantine, Arabic, Canadian, Polynesian and Korean food. She still hadn't tried Malaysian though, so there was always hope. Everyone tucked in, and as picky as Spy was, even she seemed to be enjoying herself.

"Teeny leetle Engineer-woman makes good food." Heavy said, biting into her cornbread.

"Hudda Hudda." Pyro had slid two ribs under their mask, sucked them, and spat out the bones. You didn't know how they ate. And you didn't really want to. Dot was enjoying her food, but seeing you work with her, understand her? Fuck... She was feeling something she hadn't felt in a while. Her libido wasn't high, so she really had to be into someone to get this flustered, but she couldn't deny it any longer.

Dot had the hots for you.

Chapter Text

After dinner, you cleared away the plates and Pyro got the pudding out the fridge.

"FINALLY! Some AMERICAN desserts!" Soldier yelled as Dot divided up the banana pudding. There was still some left in the dish, in case anyone wanted seconds.

"Jou should expand your palette more. I know zat jou are intolerant, but jou should just try to eat vat ve make, rather zan eating MREs instead." Medic said, taking a bite of her pudding. Ugh! So ersatz! She liked sweet food, like bakba and honey cake at new year, but she couldn't stand such artificial sweetness. It was even more disgusting than apples- and she hated apples. She pushed it away, and Scout eyed it.

"Can I..."

"Ja."

"Oh boy! Artificial flavourings!" And Jenny devoured the bowl.

"Aye, this isnae half bad." Demolass said, already drunk.

"Hudda Hudda (It tastes of sunshine and rainbows!)" Pyro declared. Heavy was picking out the banana slices and eating them, as she hadn't eaten tropical fruit until she reached the USA, and it was still a treat for her. You finished off your bowl, and licked a spot of cream from your fingers. Dot couldn't help but focus on your tongue, her cheeks turning red, sweat dripping down her back. Oh lawd... She needed you.

"This is some good pudding." You mused. Dot bit her lip, clenching her hands on her overalls legs fabric. Biscuits and gravy! She was stiff as a steel cable just thinkin' about you! As dessert was finished and people milled off, Engie stayed at the table, crossing her legs, trying not to think about you and embarrass herself. Think about something not sexy! Uh... The Administrator in a Speedo! The smell of Heavy's armpits after a 5-hour dustbowl battle! Spy in her underwear! Uh... Y/n in her underwear, posing all cute and DANGIT! She just couldn't stop thinkin' about you!

"What's up, Dot?" You asked, noticing how rigidly she was sitting.

"Uh... It's just... You're awful purty, y/n." Dot said, trying not to think too much.

"Why thank you!"

"I've just, well, shucks... Y/n, I have gotta be blunt here, I've been thinking about ya carnally." Engie said, looking down. You blinked, surprised. She had the hots for you?

"You do?"

"Yeah, I do, doll."

"Dot, if you want to fuck, you can just say, you know? I'm not afraid of some casual sex."

"Ya do? Well, butter my biscuits, because I've got me a little contraption I've been wantin' to try out!" And on that, the two of you headed to her bedroom.

Upon further thought, Engie went back for the pudding.

****

Dot didn't have a bedroom. She had a little corner of her workshop screened off, with a bed and so many blueprints stuck on the walls. The workshop was full of half-completed sentries and dispensers. She also had a mini fridge in her "bedroom", stuck under the bedside table.

"I like your nook." You said. "But will it fit both of us?"

"We ain't doing it on the bed, sugar." Dot teased. She whipped a tarpaulin off something, revealing what looked like a cross between an ottoman and a saddle. She took out a folding toolbox, and you saw that it was full of dildos!

"This purple one ain't been used, you can have it." Engie said, passing you a silicone toy. "I ain't too keen on people touchin' my privates, so I was thinkin' we both fuck ourselves? That purple one's self-thrusting, and this here? This is Rawhide, my fuck machine!" Engie patted the machine, and attached a large dildo. She pulled out a bottle of lube, and trotted over to you.

"How bout a little kiss?" She asked. You cradled her face, and started to make out with her, knocking off her hardhat. She tangled her robotic hand in your hair as she tongue kissed you, and you started to unclip her overalls. They clinked down to her ankles, and she pulled off to remove her shirt. Her breasts were pretty big, and despite her plain white bra, they were beautiful to you, freckled and plump. You gave her a wicked grin, because dear god, she was a sight, and her bra joined her shirt and overalls.

"I'm keepin' my panties on. But ya like my tits, don'tcha?" Dot asked. You picked one up, taking the nipple into your mouth, and sucked softly.

"Mmm, that's right... Suck on mah tits, that's a good girl. Ya like that, don't ya? Have a nice ol' suck, that's a good girl."

"I'm taking it that everything's bigger in Texas?" You joked, making her laugh. She reached for the half-empty pudding dish, and smeared some on her breasts, so you had to lick it off.

"Goddang, you're amazing..." Dot watched you lick up the pudding, and kissed you, tasting artificial banana and crushed wafers.

"You're so pretty, Dot." You smiled, making her blush. She clapped you on the shoulder, and made eye contact.

"Let's do this Texas style."

You sat down in her deckchair, aligning the dildo with your pussy. Engineer likewise lubricated her dildo and her hole, straddling Rawhide.

"Hoooo-ey!" She yelled as she was penetrated. "Dang, that feels so good!" You clicked on the dildo, and gasped as it started to fuck you.

"Ohhhh Engiiiiiieeee!" It moved at a breakneck pace, and felt amazing. Every nerve ending was on fire! Engie was meanwhile having a great time, riding her dildo like a cowgirl on a bronco, hollering and whooping.

"Hot dang, this is amazing! I'm gonna... Ohh... Y/n!" Dot reached down and rubbed her parts with one vibrating robot finger, and hollered as she came all over the dildo, ruining her panties. You watched the Southern belle thrash on that rubber cock, and orgasm slowly crept through you, slow and sensual like molasses dripping out the can.

"Sweet lawd, y/n, that was pretty dang good." Dot gasped. She then reached for the banana pudding, and casually ate some of it.

"How bout we share this in bed?"

"You know, Dot, you really are a genius."

Chapter Text

You'd reached your weekly ceasefire day, which Heavy was glad for. She'd been meaning to hit the gym for a while, as the fort had a small one on site, and she wanted to work on her upper arms. The Siberian giantess headed into the small room, to see that you were already there, on a treadmill- one of Engineer's creations. You were watching Star Trek on the TV mounted on the wall, but you noticed her walk in via the mirrored wall.

"Heya, Masha." You said, still focusing on the TV. She nodded at you as she headed over to the weights section, and started loading up the bench press. You tried to keep your eyes on the sci-fi series, but as Masha worked out, you couldn't help but let your eyes drift over to her. You didn't really have a preference for women, but someone as butch and buff as Masha? She'd really caught your interest. Watching her through the mirror, you couldn't help but admire her appearance, as she wasn't buff like a bodybuilder, she was a whole new level of muscle. She was built like a strong woman, with wide shoulders and a firm yet round stomach, and as she easily benched 400lbs, your eyes trailed to her massive breasts. They barely heaved, two massive melons of flesh held in place by her sports bra, and sweat trailed down her cleavage as she held up the weight. Masha gave soft little grunts as she lifted the weight up and down, her muscular arms flexing, and her massive thighs braced to hold herself steady. Something about her made you sweat, made your eyes cross, made you...

"Y/n?"

Gyaaah! She was talking to you!

"Um... Yeah?" You squeaked.

"Can come over here and feel Heavy's heartbeat?" She asked. "Want to check I am not pushing myself into übercharge."

"Um... Ok. But don't you need the medigun for that?"

"Nyet, Medigun simply charges heartbeat so fast it activates übercharge. Will only take minute to check." She tucked her hair back under the Babushka scarf she never seemed to take off, and you walked over to her. Ok, y/n, be cool. Don't panic. Don't go all moony for her!

Heavy lay down on the bench and resumed lifting, and nodded to her cleavage.

"Place hand over Heavy's heart."

"You mean on your..."

"Yes, on breast. Why are Americans so prudish? Is only body."

"Ok..."

You slid your hand onto her left breast, feeling her heartbeat. It felt normal, not the incessant drumming of an ubercharge, like a trapped bird.

"All good?"

"Umm.. yes, you're all set!" You said, retracting your hand. You then turned tail and dashed out of the room, absolutely embarrassed by how much you had a crush on her.

"Y/n? Where is y/n going? Come back!"

But you were already gone.

That evening, you attempted to ignore your crush on Masha by playing pinball on the machine in the common room. You spammed the little buttons and watched the silver ball bounce around, as Demo and John watched TV and Pyro doodled with crayons on the floor. They reached for a pink crayon, only to knock their crayon box over, and the little wax sticks rolled under the couch.

"Mmmph Mmmph!" The firebug exclaimed, scuttling after them. They reached under the couch, but their arms were too big and the gap between couch and floor was too small. They gave a little whine, and sat down on the floor.

"Leetle Pyro cannot reach crayon? Let Heavy help." Came a familiar voice. Tara and John gave an excited yell as Heavy lifted up the couch with them on one-handed, letting Pyro reach their crayons.

"Hudda Hudda!"

"Is no problem, tiny insane person." Heavy said, setting the couch down. Pyro looked at you, and pulled out a crayon labelled "Lovestruck Pink", and pointed at you.

"Ach lass, yer all sweaty." Demolass remarked. You gave an annoyed grunt, and stormed off to the kitchen.

"Y/n?"

You'd been trying to bury your head in the fridge and kill your thoughts on Heavy, but she was right there.

"What?"

"Why is y/n upset? You look so flustered around me." You sighed, and felt the need to fess up.

"Heavy, I have a crush on you. I didn't wanna tell you in case you thought I was a pervert for feeling your chest back then." You said. The massive Merc blinked, then burst out laughing.

"Is nothing to worry self about! Heavy likes leetle y/n too, da? Y/n is so small and pretty- Heavy must protect." She flexed, and you gave a little squeal.

"Oh? Does y/n like it when Heavy flexes? When Heavy carries heavy things?"

"Y-yes, I do..." You nodded, rubbing an arm along her bicep. She laughed, picked you up with one hand, and picked up a plate of sandviches with the other.

"How about we go back to Heavy's room? We can talk about books... And other things."

"You read my mind, big gal." You said. "But can we do this secretly? I don't want Scout giving us grief."

"Da, will be very quiet." And with that, she carried you to her room.

Heavy's bedroom was on the ground floor, just over the basement Medbay. She had her carpets hung up on the walls, with several overfilled bookshelves, and a large bed covered in throws, blankets and furs. A pretty single bed sat in the corner, with Grigori lying on it.

"That bed is for Grigori. DO NOT TOUCH. Heavy does not trust you enough yet." She said, kissing the barrel of her beloved minigun. Was she in love with it? Masha sat down on the bed, and patted the spot next to her, where you joined.

"Y/n... I am lying about reading books. We should kiss instead. And... Other things." She gave you a wicked smirk, and you gave one back.

"Why don't you go "Heavy" on me tonight?" You said. Masha took you by the wrists, and rolled so you were on top of her, straddling her mighty hips.

"Sex. NOW."

You knew that you were in for the ride of your life. What you didn't know was that below you, a third party was listening in, lifting her bespectacled eyes from a medical journal and letting a wicked smile paint her lips.

"Vat a curious situation... I shall just have to listen to mein Bärin and zat naughty little Backup... Hoo hoo hooo!"

Chapter Text

Masha pressed her lips to yours, her blunt tongue sliding into your mouth. You let your tongue touch hers, kissing her softly, as she held you by the waist with one giant hand.

"Tiny girl... So small... Heavy will make feel good." She said, looking down at you lovingly. You reached for her t shirt, and slowly pulled it over her head, revealing her chest and belly. GRIGORI was written in a heart tattoo on her arm, and her large breasts rested atop her stomach like two cantaloupes on a cushion. She reached behind herself and undid her bra, freeing her massive chest for your enjoyment. Heavy's breasts weren't perky, and they hung slightly, the nipples a dusty pink. She lifted her hands above her head and flexed, letting you see the sheer amount of muscle on her frame, and her hairy armpits, as she was totally unshaved. Did she eat trucks for breakfast or something? How was this chick so big?

"Is leetle y/n's turn now. Take off clothes." She demanded. She wasn't a sexy whip-cracking dominatrix, but Heavy knew what she wanted and wasn't above giving orders and taking the lead. And you liked that- you wanted a woman who'd be dominant if needed. You quickly took off your clothes, and Heavy nodded in approval, taking your breasts in her hands.

"Such pretty leetle titties..." She remarked, before leaning in and placing her lips to your left nipple. You tugged off her Babushka scarf and ran your fingers through her jaw-length brown hair as she did so, moaning and gasping. She was surprisingly gentle for someone with hands the size of dustbin lids, and you felt pampered as a princess as she took your other nipple into her mouth. She released the pebbled bud with a light pop, and gestured to her own rack.

"Come and suck." She stated. You wasted no time in latching your lips to her breast, sucking hard, squeezing the other with your hands.

"Hmmf, that is right! Suck Masha's breasts! Ooh, such hungry Leetle y/n, keep sucking like leetle baby. Plenty of tit to go round! Hahaha!"

*****

Liesel couldn't help but overhear this as she stood atop her operating table, pressing her stethoscope to the ceiling to listen better. The noises you two were making! Wunderbar! The doctor slid a gloves hand down her blouse, and squeezed her large breasts, moaning slightly. As much as she loved to be a cruel Dom, something about being ordered around by Heavy that made her pussy drip. And those tits! Liesel moved her hand from breast to crotch, and started to tease her clitoris through her panties. Mmm... Tingly.

****

You pulled off Heavy's tits, and started to kiss her again. She petted your hair with a giant hand, as she reached for the drawer on her bedside table.

"Heavy has got Leetle surprise for y/n." She said, pulling out a large strap-on. "Y/n has been good girl, so you get to keep strap warm."

"Looks like I'm getting... Peace, land and bred!" You joked, referencing the old soviet saying. Heavy's expression suddenly changed, and she glared at you.

"Blyat! Do not talk about that filth around me!" She spat. "Soviets put brothers and father in gulag! You dare dishonour Xander, Yuri and Bronislav?"

"I'm sorry!" You gasped. "I didn't know!" Heavy took a deep breath, and looked ashamed.

"No... Heavy is sorry for being so angry. But y/n has been naughty, so y/n will need punishment..."

"Bring it on." You smirked. Heavy immediately picked you up, lay you on the floor, and sat on your face. You gave a moan as her musky, unshaved cunt pressed against your lips, dripping wet with a swollen clitoris.

"Eat pussy." She demanded, reaching for a cloth. "I shall clean Grigori until I decide you have done enough." You gasped against her cunt, her massive weight pressing down on you as her thick muscular thighs and cellulite-covered ass engulfed your head, blocking out any light. Her pussy juices were bitter and tangy, and you licked her eagerly, enjoying how wet she was against you.

"That is right, feel Heavy's thighs on your slutty, stupid Leetle American head." She laughed, polishing the barrel of her minigun. Heavy kissed the handle, fondling Grigori almost lovingly.

"Maybe Heavy will just hump Grigori like pillow instead, like she often does... But Heavy knows y/n is wanting to be sorry, so y/n will earn forgiveness between Heavy's thighs."

Half an hour of pussy eating later, Heavy stood up, and carefully lifted you up.

"Is it time for me to get pegged?" You asked.

"Da. But Heavy has way to make it easier." She said, pulling a bundle of straps out her cupboard. She hung it from a hook in the ceiling, and you realised what it was. A sex swing! You let her lift you up and clip you in, and kept your legs open for her.

"Here comes the Heavy!" She grinned, strapping on her dildo. You gritted your teeth as she pressed it to your pussy, and felt it slide in, inch by inch. Such a cock! You felt like you were skewered on it.

"Is double ended... Heavy is stuffed full too..." The massive Merc groaned above you. She thrust, and you groaned as the dildo dragged against your inner walls, and Masha's huge breasts and stomach jiggled as she thrust in and out. You squeaked in pleasure, and Masha gave a glorious yell.

"Yes! That is right! Feel my cock inside you! Feel Heavy's dick in your pussy, so tight! Augh! Oooh... Oooh...y/n! Fuck, fuck, GRIGORIIIIIII!" She came around her side of the dildo, thinking about her beloved gun and you, and she delivered one final thrust that pushed you into orgasm.

"Y/n feels so good... Next time, Heavy will eat y/n's cunt too."

"Heavy, are these walls soundproof?"

"Da! All walls and ceiling in building are, except basement! Is not like anyone is underneath us listening."

****

Heavy was wrong, if the sticky mess in Liesel's panties was anything to judge by. ẞcheisse! She'd fingered her pussy until she came, and she was now dripping down to her knees. But still, she'd definitely have to have some fun with y/n in the future- maybe at the same time as Masha too. Hoo hoo, what fun!

Chapter Text

You were out on the battlefield as usual the next day, following Soldier and keeping her rocket launcher full. You'd had such fun with Heavy last night, but now you were thinking about how many of the Mercs you'd actually bedded. You'd slept with half of them at this point! Who knows, perhaps you'd be able to go in for a full house. You somewhat dreaded people finding out about this, but you hadn't promised any of them that you were all theirs. Maybe this wouldn't turn out terribly, and you'd just be able to fuck everyone. A sudden thought of you as a communal stress reliever came to your mind, your legs spread wide, every Merc running a train on you with fingers and tongues and toys and...

"MAGGOT!" You snapped out of your daydream, to see Soldier glaring at you.

"Huh?"

"We need to stop the BLU team from pushing the cart!" She ordered.

"Um, yes ma'am!" You said, reloading her launcher. The BLU Pyro sent a jet of flame your way, and Soldier jumped out of the way, but you got burned.

"MEDIC!" You yelled. She sighed, and shot at you with her Medigun.

"Be careful around fire, dumkopft." She sighed, rolling her eyes. "In case you didn't figure it out, it is hot!" She focused her Medigun on Heavy, and the two of them charged away as the giantess was Ubercharged.

"Y/n, cupcake, over here!" John yelled at you. "I need help pushing that scummy BLU team away from the cart!" You followed her down to the tracks, and pushed back on the cart with her, supplying her and Heavy with bullets as they pushed the cart back. Demolass and Heavy were pushing on the BLU team, and you saw the BLU Pyro chasing Scout.

"Need a reload, I'm too far from a dispenser!" Jenny yelled.

"Don't do it, maggot, she'll reload when she respawns!" Soldier shouted to you. But the BLU Pyro was already eyeing your team's Sniper, and you knew you'd have to supply them to help them push back against the pyromaniac.

"Leetle y/n, don't! Stay here, help us push cart! We cannot push back enough without you!" Heavy exclaimed. Your eyes flickered to her, then to Jenny, screaming as her hair caught on fire.

"I'm sorry!" You said, before darting off. You tossed ammo to Scout and Sniper, before seeing your team's Demolass, out of ammo.

"Tara!" You cried, tossing her a new round. She laughed, and stared at you with her eye.

"Ta mère est un hamster et ton père sent le sureau." She smirked.

"What?" But it was too late, and the BLU spy dropped her mask, cutting your throat.

"Y/n!" Engie yelled from her spot by the sentries. But the BLU engineer joined her team on the cart, and the payload went over the cliff, alongside several of your dead teammates.

"You MAGGOT! You lost us the match!"

Soldier was fuming all the way home in the RED Bread van. She'd crossed her arms, and was sulking like a petulant child.

"I was looking out for my teammates!"

"I TOLD you to stay with us! I am BEYOND furious at how UNAMERICAN you have been, y/n!"

"Oh, cut all this auntie Sam bullshit! So, we lost. You're being a dick, Soldier!" You spat.

"Talk nice in back." Heavy grunted, as she was driving.

"Don't tell me what to do, you soviet skank!" Soldier yelled. Heavy thumped the dashboard in fury, making the van swerve.

"Leetle Soldier is right to be annoyed, but is taking it too far. Do not provoke Heavy."

"I'm taking it too far? Y/N absolutely ruined our battle! She is a deserter! A fraud! A..."

"Enough, GI Jane." Scout sighed. "I'm mad at toots too, but you're taking it too far. Just chilled! I'm sure she'll make it up to you somehow."

"I HIGHLY doubt that." Soldier grumbled, swigging from her canteen. Make it up to her? Well, you had one idea as to how you could try. You couldn't stand her yelling, but you had a plan to make her go easier on you, albeit in an unusual way.

Evening came, and Soldier stayed sulking in her room. You had a idea about how to apologise for losing the match, because as much as you found her annoying, you didn't want to keep a grudge. You made her a bowl of tomato soup (not the roasted vegetable goodness Heavy made, but rather the powdered MRE stuff she liked) and a monte cristo- good American food- with honey on the side. You took these up on a tray, and knocked on her door.

"John?" You called. She opened it, still with her helmet on.

"John, I'm sorry I acted out and lost us the match." You said. You saw her expression change, and she shook her head.

"It was my fault, cupcake. I was actin' like a general when I'm barely a private. No wonder you didn't do what I asked! I'm so embarrassed... That ain't American of me. I give Lincoln's ghost full permission to beat me up right here." She said. You waited a minute, only for no ghost to show up.

"Well, I made your favourite dinner as an apology." You said. She sniffed, and a smile crossed her face.

"Come on in, cupcake!" Soldier's room was plain, like a barracks, with an American flag pinned to the wall and an army cot for a bed. She also had lots of GI Joe toys arranged on a shelf, complete with little tanks and jets. The two of you shared the soup and sandwich, and you gave her bedroom eyes.

"John... Is there anything I can do to help make it up to you?" You said, raising an eyebrow. She caught what you meant, and opened a drawer.

"Well, cupcake, you could always put this on... And we could have some fun!"

Chapter Text

You stood in Soldier's en-suite, checking your reflection in the mirror. She'd brought out a playboy bunny costume for you to wear, and you were adjusting the bodice of the black silky bodysuit, and trying not to wobble in your high heels. The stockings cradled your legs tightly, and the ears, cuffs and bowtie finished the look. You didn't have the tail yet, though- that was attached to a plug, and John wanted to be the one who put it in you.

"You ready, cupcake?" She called.

"Yeah, I'm coming!" You replied, opening the door to the bathroom and posing. Soldier had taken off her helmet, and she grinned lecherously.

"Stars N' stripes, aren't you a pretty sight?" She said. You blew her a kid, and tottered over on your high heels. You had no idea that THIS was what Soldier was into, but you weren't complaining.

"Come sit on my lap, bunny." The older woman sat back, her beige hair escaping it's bun, and you straddled her. She pulled you into a kiss, her lips tasting like processed tomato soup and honey as she slicked up the bunny tail plug. Slick fingers probed at your arsehole, and you groaned as she slid them into you, stretching you wide enough for the intrusion. You clenched greedily around the plug as it was pushed in, and John squeezed the fluffy tail on the end, which made it make a squeaking noise.

"Oh!"

"Cute noise you got there, bunny. Now let's not beat around the bush anymore, as I have a duty tonight, cupcake, and that's to teach you how to really bounce!"

John's fingers trailed along your chest, her chunky hands surprisingly nimble, with a few burns from her rocket launcher and callouses from carrying around her shovel. She slid her fingers under the cups of the bodysuit and squeezed your nipples, as you ground your crotch on her thigh.

"Ain't you a cute little bunny? If you're good, I'll get you a fun little "carrot" to play with, cupcake." She laughed at this.

"Ha, carrots. Bunnies eat carrots." You giggled obediently, in a slightly ditzy way, and Soldier wound her fingers in your hair. She slowly pressed you onto your knees, and pulled down her combat pants. John was fairly well groomed down there, her pubes clipped short like a military haircut, and her skin smelled like a mix of sweet honey and burnt gunpowder. She was fairly broad and stocky, with chunky calves and midsize breasts, and you saw her bare frame as she undid her jacket.

"Well, cupcake? Eat up." She said, taking your bunny ears in her hand. You fluttered your lashes, and slowly pressed your tongue to her pussy. You licked at her hole, pushing the tip of your tongue in and slurping softly at her bitter juices.

"Hrrrng! Yes, that's it! Good girl! G-get my clit too..." You didn't need telling twice, and you started to pepper her clitoris with kisses as you fingered her opening. The Midwestern Merc above you grunted and groaned as you sucked her stiff bud, squeezing her breasts and groaning.

"Goddammit cupcake... The only way I could be more aroused is if I was getting fucked by Lord Liberty himself... Ffffuck..." You pushed that insane image out of your head as you kept eating her out, before she tapped you on the head.

"I don't wanna cum yet, bunny. I wanna drag this out for a bit, ya hear?"

"Oh yes, ma'am." You said, acting ditzy and dumb. Soldier lay you down on her military cot, and pulled something out of a drawer- a strap on.

"Here's your "carrot"."

"You're going to fuck me?" You asked.

"Negative! YOU are going to fuck ME!" She squeaked your fluffy tail again, and you took the harness from her, strapping it on. The fat rubber cock on it stood up proudly in the air, and John straddled you, eagerly gazing at the fat rubber cock before her.

"Prepare yourself, cupcake!" She ordered, before slamming down on your strap on. You groaned with pleasure, as the base of the toy was rubbing against your clit through the fabric of your bodysuit, and your eyes rolled back.

"Good girl, cupcake! Bounce your strap in me and fuck all your brains out!" The soldier gasped as you thrusted in and out of her, her breasts bouncing as you pounded away. You couldn't think of anything but how good it felt to fuck her, to have her weight bounce on you, and the fat plug up your arse making a squeak on every thrust. Just a dumb playboy-bunny babe who loved to fuck! You groaned as you kept rutting against the base, and you came with a soft sigh. John grabbed your breasts and gave a mighty yell as she gripped around the strap on, and came hard.

"Nice work, bunny!" Soldier pulled off of you, and took you in her arms, letting you slowly float back to reality. She slid out your plug and pulled off your bowtie, letting you come about in her arms.

"John, that was fun, I've got to admit. I never knew being a dumb bunny-girl could feel so good!"

"Sweet freedom, Xander is going to love you dressed up like that."

"Xander?"

"Well... I've sort of got a mixed relationship going on with Demolass, Engie and Xander. He's Heavy's brother, and he's my sweet lil cupcake." She showed you a picture of an enormously muscular guy with long brown hair and a purple shirt.

"I don't make war with him, I make love." She proudly stated.

"Fuck me, it's a good day to be bisexual." Was all you could say in response. Squished between John and Xander? Sounded like your kind of evening.

Chapter Text

You were planning on sleeping in on your next ceasefire day, as you only had one a week, but you got awakened at 6am by Soldier playing her bugle.

"MAGGOTS! WAKE UP! IT'S EXAMINATION DAY!" She yelled.

"Huh? Exam? But I didn't have time to study!" You gasped, feeling panic that you hadn't felt since high school.

"Not that sorta examination, toots. We all get our yearly check from the doc." Scout butted in, sticking her head out her bedroom door. You shuffled downstairs, eager to have some coffee, but Spy tutted when you headed for the machine.

"You'll need an empty stomach for her to examine you. So no food or drink until after the check."

"But I'm hungry!" You whined.

"Look, I'll make us all a real big breakfast once sawbones has finished her dirty work. Eggs, pancakes, grits, sausages patties, hash browns, corn fritters and ohhh... Bacon..." Engie said, drooling slightly. "It'll only be what, three hours? She works quick."

"Oh, alright." You said, heading down to the medbay and taking a ticket from the reel outside. You looked down at it, and gulped. #1! You were going to be first! The door to the medbay swung open, reeking of disinfectant.

"Come in!"

"Good luck, mate." Sniper muttered as you stepped into the dimly lit lab.

The medbay had a tiled floor with a drain in it, all sorts of charts pinned on the walls, and a fluorescent cold white light cutting through the gloom. You took off your hoodie and sat down on the papery sheets that covered the examination table, shuddering at the leather straps on it, and her dishes and racks of sharp implements. The Medigun hung from the ceiling, over where she'd usually operate on her patients. Dozens of doves fluttered around (that couldn't be sanitary) and an old skeleton sat in the corner. Surely it couldn't be a real skeleton, right?

"Ah! Frau y/n!" The Medic spun around on her desk chair, turning away from her stack of medical journals. She had her usual white cap atop her wild black curls, and she stared at you from over her cat's eye glasses.

"Mein favourite patient. I've been looking forward to... Examining you..." She had a mad grin, and her icy blue eyes fixed on you like a searchlight. She snapped on her red latex gloves, and picked up a clipboard with your files on it.

"If you vould just stand on the scale... That's it." You stepped up onto the scale in the corner of the room, and she jotted down your height and weight.

"Aren't you going to do my BMI?"

"BMI? Feh! That doesn't determine health! It's pseudoscience. I don't believe BMI. I might as vell believe in eugenics, or horoscopes, or Scientology." You sat back down on the couch, and she strapped on a blood pressure cuff.

"That's pretty tight..." You winced.

"Relax, I have very little professional training." She grinned. Archimedes fluttered around your head as she checked your temperature and pulse, and ran an x-ray screen over you.

"Hmm, you still appear to have all your bones. Like ze spine, ze ribs, and ze head-bone." She said. "That is usually a good sign."

"So am I all done?" You asked.

"Oh, Nein. I have to check you for tumours!"

"TUMOURS?!"

"Ve had a scare with ze teleporter once, making tumours in bread. So I must check you for tumours and lumps." You allowed her to x-ray your head and chest, and she peered at the results.

"Hmmm, no tumours in your bones or organs, zat is good. But I must check your... Fattier deposits."

"Huh?"

"Frau y/n, I must feel your chest and buttocks in order to check for lumps. Do you consent?" She asked.

"Um, ok. If it's necessary." You said. With cold, clinical detachment, Medic slid her hands under your shirt, and squeezed your breasts. She then gestured for you to stand up, and felt your backside.

"Nein, no lumps. You are all good! And do take ein sticker and lollipop for being an OK patient." You thanked her, and headed out, to the sound of birds scratching their beaks on the skeleton.

"NEXT!"

Once you were gone...

"She's very pretty, isn't she, Archimedes?"

"Coo."

"Vell, she can handle Heavy. I'll just have to vait for an opportunity. Or maybe me and Masha can share her! Ahoohoohoo!"

"Coo."

"So, how did it go with nurse Wretched?" Spy asked later. Engineer had made all sorts of breakfast food, and you were all digging in.

"If you're wonderin' about why it has to be done on an empty stomach, it's so she can see if she's sewn a dove inside ya belly, like she did with me once." Scout said, dunking a pancake in her fried egg and biting it.

"What? Well... She didn't do that. And I got a sticker." You said, pointing to your chest where it was stuck.

"Well, at least that's that over for another year." Sniper said.

"Silence, all you. Doktor does good job for us all! She is just unusual." Heavy grunted.

"Jeez, what, are ya in love with her? Why don't you two go and suck each other's saggy old lady tits someplace else? I... OW!" Scout was interrupted by Medic slamming the butt of her bonesaw on her skull, and the doctor sat down between you and Heavy, putting her plate of eggs and hash browns on the table. She had wide hips covered by her black skirt, and her knee high boots clacked on the industrial metal floors. There was something oddly attractive about her- you just didn't know what.

"I've heard it all before and vorse, Frau Jennifer. So shut up and eat." She snapped. "And mein breasts are not saggy. Mein titten are glorious and large!" You couldn't help but glance, and it was true, she was very curvy. Medic has a very big chest, second only to Heavy's.

"Doktor has such way with words." Heavy simpered. She just waved her hand indulgently at this, and tossed some pancake to Archimedes. Sniper slathered Vegemite on her pancakes, and Pyro went back to drinking their grits with a curly straw.

Later, as it got dark, Pyro put a movie on the projector. Medic had gone off to have a bath, but as you watched, you shivered.

"Hey y/n, where's ya hoodie?" Scout asked.

"Hm? Oh, I must've left it in the Medbay. Eh, Doc won't mind if I go and fetch it." You said, heading down. You reached the doors, but you stopped dead before them, and peered through the window, shocked at what you saw.

Chapter Text

The door to Medic's quarters was open, and you could hear the bath running. The doctor stood with her back to the door, undressing casually. You couldn't resist but gawp at her as item after item of clothing was peeled away from her skin. Under her clothes, Medic wore some pretty old fashioned underwear- stockings with suspenders, a shift, short bloomers and a corset too! She let down her hair from the bun, and it hung in thick inky curls down her back, streaked with silver. You felt your cheeks heat up as she unclipped her stockings and slid them down, revealing her creamy, pale flesh, and undid her corset. Medic didn't notice you peeping at her, and you had to hold in a gasp as she pulled off her shift and bloomers, revealing her fully nude body. Her breasts were simply enormous, and she had an amazing arse and thick thighs too. There was a little paunch on her stomach, but she still had an amazing hourglass figure, with thick, dark hair between her legs. Heidi strutted off to the bathroom and closed the door, and you suddenly remembered why you were here. Your hoodie!

You snuck into the medbay and started looking for the jacket, before spying the sleeve poking out from underneath Heidi's pile of clothes. You slid your hand into the pile and grabbed it, yanking it out. You didn't want her to find out that you had been peeping on her, you just wanted to...

"Y/n?" With a sinking feeling, you turned around. Heidi was standing there in her dressing gown, staring at you. You went to say something, before a small piece of fabric fluttered out of the folds of your hoodie. Shit! Her pantaloons must've been tangled up in there! Her eyes fixed on her underwear, now on the floor, and she glared at you.

"Vell vell... A peeping tom?" She cooed. "I know just vhat I must do." The Medic lunged like a falcon, and grabbed you by the wrist, pinning you to the operating table. She grabbed her bonesaw with the other hand, and pointed it at you.

"Vere you stealing my panties for someone else? Hmm? Vere you spying on me undressing? Vat a slippery little thing you are!"

"It was an accident!" You squeaked. "I... I only came down here to get my hoodie back! Honestly, I didn't mean to pick up your undies."

"Hm." She lowered the saw, and let go of your wrist. "I see. It vas just a mistake, Nein? Anyway if you vanted to fuck me, schatz, you could've just said- like you did with Heavy."

Your eyes widened at this.

"I heard you fucking through the floorboards. Heavy's room is right over mein lab. It's delightful to hear her fuck you hard! Just like I fuck her, and she fucks me."

"You fuck hard?" You laughed. Fuck it, you might as well fuck the Medic. "Well then, do your worst on me."

Heidi gave her signature slightly mad smirk.

"Glady..."

You wriggled against your bonds, strapped down to the operating table on all fours and naked. Medic said she had a "surprise" for you, but that was twenty minutes ago, before she'd stuck a vibrator up your pussy and blindfolded you. You didn't dare cum, but your slick was drooling down your thighs, soaking the table below your twitching, needy cunt. You heard the click of her boots on the floor, alongside much heavier footsteps, and the blindfold was tugged away.

"Hallo, mein kleiner schlampe." Heidi cooed, snapping a riding crop against her thigh. She was wearing a black leather corset and gloves alongside her boots and stockings, with a fat strap-on jutting from between her legs. She was accompanied by Heavy, who was naked with a collar around her neck.

"Now, me and Masha are going to punish you, then make you watch us have some fun. If you can hold onto your orgasm like a good girl, ve vill let you cum! Around my big fat strap-on! Aren't you a lucky girl?" Medic cooed. "What do you say to that?"

"Green." You replied, using the safe word code you'd agreed on earlier. She kissed your cheek, leaving a red lipstick mark, and tossed a corset to Masha.

"But first... I think my boots need polishing." She smirked, placing one boot-clad foot on the table. You didn't need telling twice, and started to lick and kiss her heeled boots, worshipping the supple black leather with your tongue. She offered her other boot and you did likewise before she pulled back.

"Put this on her, Masha. Make it nice and tight." She said, drawing her riding crop. As Masha fastened the corset around you, you groaned at the feeling of your waist being cinched from the strings. You gave a sudden yelp as Heidi brought down the riding crop on your arse, leaving a stinging red welt. Masha cinched your waist as tight as was safe, and tied the strings as Heidi kept spanking you, your arse turning red.

"Ohhh! Fuck!" You gasped. Heidi just laughed wildly, and slapped Masha on the bum.

"Come on, mein Bärin, let's have some fun. And y/n is only allowed to watch!" She teased.

You held back your moans as you watched Heidi and Masha scissor their pussies together, smearing the wetness all over themselves. The vibrator buzzed away inside you as the two dominants sucked on each other's breasts, fingers rubbing one another's clits. You gave a soft gasp, and they both turned to look at you.

"Heavy, you can have her mouth. I'm going to put this strap to good use." Heidi smirked, rubbing the dildo along your soaking wet slit. She yanked out the vibrator and aligned herself with your hole, her massive chest heaving as she pushed into you. Heavy placed a leg up on the table, and you buried your face in her pussy yet again, lapping at her bitter juices. Heidi fucked you hard and rough from behind, a finger swiping along where her strap entered you to taste your wetness on it. Oh fuck! You were so hot and wet around her, she almost couldn't hear it.

"Ja, good girl, taking mein big dildo inside you! That's it, keep your cunt nice and stretched open round me! Oh fuck, fuck, you're so tight!" She whined. You knew how good having the base of a strap on rub your clit could feel, and Masha's loud gasps as you ate her out helped too. The burly Siberian grabbed you by the hair and slammed your face deep into her pussy, and Medic gave a wanton laugh that became a loud moan as she came, pounding you harder with the strap.

"Please let me cum!" You gasped.

"Ja, cum around the dildo! Fuck!" Heidi grinned. You whined as you let go, and Masha groaned as she soaked your face in her wetness. You flopped in your bonds, gasping for air as Heidi undid the straps and Masha got you a glass of water.

"Good girl... You did such a good job for your mistresses." She smiled, kissing you. Masha kissed you two, and you let them lift you off the table.

"Y/n is such good little submissive for her dominants." Masha said as her and Liesel carried you into the bathroom, and started running you a hot bath.

"Maybe I should wear a sexy nurse costume next time." You mused.

"Oh Fraulein! You know exactly how to tease me!"

Chapter Text

They say that hell is cold, but that's a lie. Dustbowl was hot as fuck, and you knew it must be hell, as you felt like you were being tortured. Sweat ran down your forehead in fat droplets the size of peas, and down your back under your sticky shirt. Your bag of ammo weighed you down, and whenever you breathed in, you got a cloud of hot dust with it. You smacked your lips together, but there was no moisture there at all, and they were chapped with dust. You were glad for your goggles, because the dust would've blinded you. And yet, despite all the running and pushing of the cart kicking up huge clouds of dust, Sniper's aim was perfect on every shot. She sat up on the roof, shooting down BLU team members like sitting ducks, occasionally adjusting her hat or glasses. Heavy charged past you, screaming "Ratatatata!" only to cough and stop doing so as it filled her lungs up with sand.

"Doktor! I cannot breathe!"

"Jahwol, try to keep your mouth closed." Medic yelped as a sandfly bit her, and swatted it away.

"Scheiße!"

Scout was howling as sand was in her eyes, and the BLU team were struggling to push the cart in the middle of the sandstorm. They flopped against it, and Soldier trudged up to push back.

"America... Fuck yeah..." She sighed as she gave it a half-arsed push. It trundled down the tracks, security victory for the RED team.

"Yay..." You grunted, before collapsing.

****

"Shit!" Sniper jumped down from her perch and ran over to you, picking you up. "She's dehydrated, she needs some water!"

"Well, use jarate." Spy sniffed. Sniper glared at her for this.

"You idiot, if you're dehydrated you mustn't drink piss! Y/n needs water."

"Ey bushgirl, we're in the desert, not much water here." Scout said. "I'll call Mr Pauling and get him to..." Sniper suddenly started jumping up and down, drumming her feet on the ground.

"Um, what? Have you lost your goshdanged mind?" Engie asked.

"I need a frog! Some frogs store water inside themselves and bury themselves below the ground. I brought a bottle over from 'Straya and released them into the wilds here. This old aboriginal chap I met told me that if I'm ever out in the desert and out of water, I just need to stamp on the ground like this, and the frogs will think it's a rainstorm. They'll come up and... Now!"

A fat, round frog had popped up from it's burrow. Sniper grabbed the amphibia, held your mouth open, and squeezed it. Water gushed out the frog's skin and into your mouth, and you spluttered.

"Hahhh?" Why were you on the floor? And why was Sniper waving a frog around?

"Y/n! You're dehydrated, girl. Come let Mundy take care of you." She said, scooping you into her arms and carrying you back to the RED Bread van.

****

Once you were back at base, Sniper carried you into her van and lay you down on the couch in her van. She soaked several cloths in cold water and applied them to your forehead and pulse points, and got you some cool L&P to drink.

"It is best that you stay with Frau Sniper, y/n, she knows how to cure ze heatstroke." Medic had said.

"I've lived out in the outback most my life, I'm just glad you didn't get anymore dehydrated. Bloody bogan Administrator, making us fight in that weather!" Sniper snapped.

"Michelle, it's ok. You'll make me better." You said, sipping your drink.

"I know, mate, but I hate the idea of you getting sick, you know? You're special to me." She said. "You're a Sniper's best friend, keeping my gun loaded. I'm not good with people, but I feel comfortable with you. Like I don't have to worry about breaking some social rule I've never heard of."

"Oh Michy, I like being with you too! And I wanna stay with you until I'm better." You said. She grinned, and turned on the TV she kept atop her freezer full of kangaroo meat and golden gaytimes.

"Shall we watch Croc Huntress?"

"Sounds like a plan."

Chapter Text

You'd been steadily recovering for the past three days, happy to have Michelle's attention. It was another evening, and you'd just finished off the kangaroo steaks she'd cooked (Mich very rarely ate with the rest of the Mercs).

"You know, you're actually a lot of fun." You said. "I wish I'd have hung out with you sooner."

"I'm just... Introverted, oi suppose. Ah don't really socialise well. It's like everyone else is following some sort of rulebook ah didn't get?" She said, scratching her forehead. "Oi don't know what it is, ah just don't handle socialising very well. It's why I like to stay in my van, or up my tower. People just don't get me. But you do, y/n."

"You're a good egg, Michelle." You smiled. "Screw them if they don't get you."

"I'm not the only one here who's a bit... Different. I don't know what it is. Soldier has no inside voice, Heavy lugs that minigun around like a comfort blanket, Scout never rests or pays attention, and Medic?" She gave a slight laugh.

"Screw normal. This is better."

"You mean it, sheila?"

"I mean it. I like how you're all stealthy like an owl, and you know loads about the outback. I bet you even know how to wrestle a crocodile!" You grinned.

"Sure as hell, y/n! I was top of my class for croc-wrestling! Wasn't too good at history or home ec, but I'd always get A* in that one class." Sniper adjusted her sunglasses and patted you on the back after saying this.

"Wait, that's a school subject down under?"

It wasn't until later, with Croc Huntress on TV, that the subject of wrestling came back up.

"Is that really how it's done, Michelle?"

"Sure is. Want me to demonstrate on ya?" You nodded, and lay down on the sofa. Sniper straddled you, and gave a playful yell as she flipped you over.

"This one's a beauty!" She cried. You wriggled playfully, rubbing yourself against her, and the two of you wrestled on the couch for a good few minutes. Sniper pinned you beneath her, and against your will, a lusty moan fell from your lips.

"Oh? You like wrestling with ol' Michelle, do you?" Sniper grinned crookedly.

"Um... Yes." You squeaked. "Don't take this the wrong way, Micky, but you're hot."

"Likewise to you, luv." She'd taken off her shirt, and you took in her lean muscled arms. "But if you wanna take this a step further, I'll take a shower. You probably don't like my stink." She did smell pretty ripe from the hot weather, but you just grinned.

"Michelle, I love that musk of yours." You said. She laughed, and slid her bra off, revealing her bare breasts.

"Then let's get even sweatier." She teased, yanking down her trousers. You pressed your face to her crotch, breathing in the musky smell of her wet, hairy cunt. You pulled her panties down with your teeth, and nuzzled into her bush, pressing your tongue to her clit.

"That's right, love, breathe me in! Let's see if you can cum just from eating my bogan cunt, you dirty girl." She teased, taking you by the hair and pressing your face into her folds. You tongue fucked her hungrily, sucking her wetness from her pubes, as you desperately fingered yourself.

"Good girl, rubbing ya clit to ol'mundy. That's it, love! Finger your hole whilst you eat mine!" Her dirty talk turned into gasps, and eventually a loud moan as she came, soaking your face in her squirt. You licked it up, and she faced you with a devilish look.

"Not done yet, love? Let my fingers sort that out." She pinched your clit, making you gasp, and started to finger fuck you hard, feeling your wetness ooze around her.

"Oh Michelle, I'm gonna squirt!" You blushed, embarrassed.

"Don't be shy, Sheila, squirt all over my fingers. Soak yourself in piss for me!" She laughed.

"It's not piss!" You gasped, cheeks going red.

"Good, it'd be a waste to not get any into a jarate." She said in an offhanded manner, before sliding another finger into you. You groaned, gushing around her intruding fingers, and she pulled them out with a satisfied look.

"Look at that, gushing like a fountain. My pretty lil' koala, so eager for me." She kissed your cheek, before sucking her fingers dry. "But you're still so wet for me..."

"I've heard that everything from Australia can "eat you", is that true?" You teased. Michelle just licked her lips, and slid her head down.

Safe to say, nobody was dehydrated that night!

Chapter Text

It was training day at the fort, so battle had been called off, and Soldier had been eager to show off her homemade assault course. It was a huge track of logs, nets, ropes and mud, and she expected you ALL to complete it. The Administrator had put her in charge of physical training for the day, and she was grinning under her oversized helmet.

"ALL of you maggots must complete this course! It is an ORDER from the top! And if you do not, I shall execute you myself, you filthy commies!"

Mr Pauling whispered something to her.

"I mean... You won't get dessert for a week!" She grinned, and headed to her place on the track, where you were all waiting for the whistle to blow and the course to start. You were next to Spy, who was wearing a tailored jacket, pencil skirt and collared shirt despite the arduous task. She had her usual beret and sunglasses on, with a cigarette between her ruby red lips.

"What's with the designer clothes?" You asked. It seemed very out of place for a course like this.

"I do everything in style, y/n. You wouldn't know." She said haughtily. The whistle went, and you were off!

***

You stumbled over the first log, trying to keep your balance. Pyro had already fallen over, and you clambered into the tube. You crawled through it on your hands and knees, only to be smacked from behind.

"Hurry up! Allons-y!" Spy yelled from behind. "I cannot see anything because of your enormous behind!"

"Shuddup!" You yelled, pulling yourself out the tube. The next section of the course was a set of horizontal ladders over a mud pit. You stumbled over one, and you heard a loud yell as Heavy lost her footing and fell off the ladder, into the mud.

"Get back up, maggot!" Soldier yelled. You kept walking carefully, pushing your hands out, and jumped from the ladder onto dry ground. Spy gave a yell from behind you, and you cringed, as bouncing on the ladder had flipped her off, and she had landed in the mud.

"Merde! This is DESIGNER!" She yelled, crawling out the mud and to the next section, which was a climbing net.

"Why are you wearing designer clothes to an assault course?" You snapped. Spy gave an angry yell and shook the net, making you lose your balance. You smacked your head on the wooden frame, getting a nosebleed.

"Bitch!"

"Putain!" The two of you started to claw at each other, only for Soldier to run in and yell.

"ENOUGH FIGHTING, RECRUITS! We won't defeat the commies like this!" She yelled. You just daubed at your bloody nose, and scrambled over the rest of the course.

You headed back to the base after the course, feeling like shit. You hadn't meant to piss off Spy, and your nose stung like hell. You really did feel bad for ruining her suit, as you saw her drop her dirty clothes into the laundry basket, wearing her other pencil skirt and blazer. You had an idea, and as soon as she'd left, reached for the basket.

A few hours later, you knocked on Spy's door.

"What is it?" She grumbled, only to raise an eyebrow as she saw you holding her perfectly ironed and cleaned suit out in a suit bag.

"Spy, I felt bad about ruining your suit. So I did your laundry, and washed all the mud out. I didn't mean to upset you." You said.

"Well... I did not mean to make your nose bleed." She said.

"If there's anything else I can do for you, just say." You said. Spy raised an eyebrow, and gave a little laugh.

"Well, y/n.... You're pretty good at tidying up. How about I see how you can be a good little maid in other ways, non?"

Chapter Text

You tottered forward on high heels, shiny black patent leather with pointy toes. When Spy had suggested you cleaning up, she had produced a maid costume from her wardrobe. And here you were, in a short black silk dress with puff sleeves, a white apron, a frilly headpiece and fishnet stockings. Spy's smoking room was as classy and glamorous as you had expected for a sybarite like her. There was a drinks cupboard with crystal glasses and all manners of wines and spirits in the hardwood shelves, a red velvet chaise lounge, and a collection of paintings on the walls- all famous paintings with her face edited over. Mona Spy, Spy with the Pearl Earrings, The Birth of Spy... The heavy red velvet curtains were drawn, and the carpet was thick under your heels. Simone lounged on her chaise lounge, smoke trailing from the cigarette in her holder.

"Ah, y/n. How do you like your little costume I picked out for you?" She said, grinning wickedly with her red lipsticked lips.

"It's nice." You replied. The skirt was very short and she hadn't given you any underwear, so you were tugging it down, blushing.

"Oh, don't be so shy. No need to cover up your pussy around your Mistress." She purred. "Now, your first duty- get me a glass of wine. '62 Chateau De Hamster, red, in a crystal glass." You tottered over and poured a glass of the red stuff, putting the bottle in an ice bucket to keep it chilled. You handed it to her, and she gestured for you to kneel.

"Now, be a good side table." Spy sniffed, resting her ashtray on your head. She then flipped open a glossy copy of Vogue, and brought her cigarette to her lips.

Half an hour had passed. You were twitching with neediness, and Spy was just ignoring you. She'd given a little smile at a photoshoot of women in black lingerie, and had slid her fingers down her knickers. The Spy was idly fingering herself as you bit your lips and tried not to shake.

"Jealous?" She purred. "Mon petit, are you jealous of your mistress?" Simone slid her wet fingers out of her underwear, and pressed them into your mouth as she snuffed her cigarette out. Spy stripped out of her suit, revealing her sexy red lace lingerie. A bullet bra and french knickers with stockings and garters, but she left her sunglasses on. Her silky black bob was streaked with grey, and you ached to rub your fingers through it.

"You have such lovely hair, Mistress." You grinned dopily.

"Well then, how about you be a good maid and look after it?" You reached for her scalp, only for her to grab your wrist.

"I didn't mean the stuff on my head." She said, pushing you down onto the couch. Her armpits and legs were shaved bare, her eyebrows plucked into beautiful swoops, but good God, her bush! Her cunt was absolutely untrimmed, hairs poking from behind the fabric of her knickers. The Spy settled on your face, her perky butt pressing against your head as her cunt flared over your lips.

"Now lick up all my wetness before it spills on the carpet." She sniffed, filing her nails as she rutted her clit against your tongue. "Or else I shall spank you until your derrière is rose-red!"

"Yes Mistress!" You yelped.

"But if you are good... I shall reward you. I shall trib you until you see stars, how does that sound?"

You started licking like you'd never licked before. And as the sun set and the stars rose into the sky, you and Spy sat on the chaise lounge with wine and cigarettes- not as Mistress and Servant, but as two lovers- and rutted your cunts together until you were both panting, gasping messes.

Chapter Text

Heavy's fathers and brothers were coming round tomorrow, meaning that she was in an absolute frenzy. You'd just gotten back in from Sawmill, and she was already dashing off to get the vacuum cleaner and mop.

"Spy, you dusting. Scout, sort out trash. Everyone is needing to make fort in decent condition!" She barked.

"It's just your old man and your bros, ain't like there's a royal family coming to stay." Scout jeered.

"Blyat, be quiet! Family has just gotten green card to live in America, far away from Siberia. They will be safe here- must make them feel welcome before they are moving up to snowy Colorado."

"Roger that! All you MAGGOTS must clean this place up! I want to be able to eat an all-American steak off the floor!" Soldier yelled.

"Ooh, does wee Johnny have a crush on Heavy's brother?" Demolass teased. Soldier went as red as her jacket, and pulled her helmet down.

"I just wanted... To impress him." She muttered. Heavy tossed you a rubbish bag, and pointed to the fridge.

"Anything mouldy- in bag." Medic breathed a sigh of relief, as she hated dirt and mould. But nobody else ever seemed to be bothered by it!

"And Doktor? Go and give doves a bath. Heavy does not want them making poopies on things."

The day of the visit came, and despite Heavy's ministrations, Soldier seemed incredibly excited. She had taken an incredibly long everything-shower last night, and now smelled of her candy-scented body products. The taxi came rattling down the road, and Heavy rushed out to greet her relatives. Her father was an old man with white hair, and her three brothers followed- one a thin blonde, one a short brunette in a hat, and the final one was a huge, buff guy with very long brown hair.

"Papa!" Heavy grinned, pulling her father into a hug. "So glad you are here... You are safe..."

"My word, Masha, you get bigger every time I see you!" Her papa replied proudly.

"Da! Have been fighting lots!"

"That's my girl." Heavy picked up this cases and headed in with her pa and two of her brothers, only for one to hang back. Xander, the huge fella with long hair, strode over to Soldier and picked her up in a hug.

"My Johnny! It has been too long!"

"Xander! I have a gift for you!" John pulled a little box out of her pocket, and you gasped. Was she proposing? She opened it up, to reveal... A snail, some gravel and two paperclips. A tear came to Xander's eye, and he lovingly put the little box in his pocket.

"Such a lovely gift, honey-maggot... I have one for you too." He then promptly gave Soldier an ear. It looked human... You didn't ask.

"An ear!" Soldier grinned. "Like the one I gave you!" She stuffed it under her helmet, and the two skipped off hand-in-hand. Their relationship was utterly, completely weird... But you couldn't lie, it was adorable.

Heavy had made a massive stew for dinner, and after a hearty meal, you headed up to your room. You planned to go and take a big nap as you were so full, but an hour after you nodded off, you woke up to strange sounds. Your room was next to Soldier's, but despite the walls being soundproofed, you could hear someone thumping on the wall. Was she in trouble? Oh god, had the BLU Spy broken in?! You snuck out of bed and pressed your eye to the keyhole, only to let out a gasp at what you'd walked in on. Soldier and Xander were on the bed, naked and making out! They were squeezing one another's chests, Xander's thick, buff form pressed against John's stocky, thick body and wide hips. Her big tits shook as Xander kissed her neck, but they both stopped when they heard your gasp. Soldier strode over to the door, threw it open, and grabbed you by the scruff of your neck.

"She is spying on us!" She yelled. "Tell me why you were peering at me and Xander doing the sideways Charleston? Did you want to sneak a peek at my massive, 'murican mammaries?" She boomed.

"I heard thumping! I thought the BLU Spy had broken in!" You gasped, slightly terrified of this furious naked lady. Soldier simply carried you into her room, and shut the door.

"Well, y/n, you have interrupted mine and Xander's mutually assured copulation. What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Tiny girl should not be pervert." Xander sniffed.

"I'm sorry... And you can both fuck me as an apology on my behalf?" You suggested. Their eyes lit up, and Xander produced a jar of honey from under the bed.

"Honey-maggot? Get the costume. I have had idea on how to really make Y/N show she's sorry..."

Two minutes later, you knelt before the two of them in some cute, fuzzy lingerie. Soldier had apparently made it herself out of teddy bears, and the bra cups were teddy faces. The panties were small and fluffy, and there were fuzzy mittens and boots too, alongside a pair of fluffy bear ears.

"Ain't that cute! We got ourselves a cuddle-bear!" Soldier grinned. She took the jar of honey and poured a measure all over Xander, rubbing it into his chest and on his abs, and all over his thick cock. He did likewise to Soldier, and the golden honey glistened on her bush and her big tits.

"Well, cupcake? Come and feast!" She ordered. You crawled onto the bed and started to suck her breasts, as she licked up Xander's thick, buff abs. He was so hard, and she kissed the tip before sliding down and taking his whole cock into her mouth. She gave little gasps and moans around that fat fuckmeat as she sucked away, and you kept licking all the honey off her front. You took her thick, dark nipples into your mouth and slobbered all over them, absolutely smearing yourself with honey as you did so.  She shifted position, so that she was on all fours, and wiggled her honey-covered butt at Xander.

"How about some honey buns?" She joked. He laughed, and promptly pressed his face into her butt, leaving a crimson love bite before licking eagerly at her thicc cheeks. You made out with her as you did so, a hand tangling in her short beige hair, and the Soldier moaned in bliss.

"Ohhh, I'm close... Xander! Fuck me from behind, and Y/N? Sit on my face!" The three of you scooted around a bit, and Soldier gave a loud moan as Xander thrust into her. For someone usually so bossy and domineering, she just loved to have him take charge. Feeling his massive cock inside of her always made her moan!

"Yesss, that's it! Fuck me real hard! That is AMERICA'S pussy, so fuck me until I squirt all over you!"

"You like that, Johnny? You like it when Xander fucks you? Fills up your cunt with his cock?"

"Yes! Yes!" Soldier pressed her face into your pussy, but she was still desperately moaning. "I need you to screw me hard, you big Siberian stud! Uuugh!" She moaned into your pussy as you rode her face, her thighs trembling as Xander fucked into her, and the Soldier came apart with a loud whine as she came. Her juices seeped out around Xander's dick, soon turning white as he reached his peak with a loud groan, and you gave a whine as Soldier's persistent tongue pressed against your clit.

"Ffffuck... Excellent job, private." Soldier groaned as you pulled off her face. "You sure satisfied a cock- and cunt-hungry missy like me."

"Xander will happily satisfy his lovely Honey-maggot." Xander stated as he pulled out of John, and got her a washcloth. You were all sticky from the honey, and your eyes roved over to the open door to the bathroom.

"Round two in the shower, anyone?"

Chapter Text

You'd just gotten back from a round of king of the hill at Applejack, and you were all exhausted from all the running around. Scout had downed twice as much bonk as usual, and Sniper was making strange glances at one of her jarate jars. The RED bread van rumbled back up to the base, and you all piled out, eager for a drink. Maybe some sugar too... You were really exhausted.

"Is there anything in the fridge?" You panted.

"Affirmative! We have the finest of American Gatorade!" Soldier yelled. You pulled out a blue one and swigged it, eager for the electrolytes.

"Hudda hudda!" Pyro exclaimed, rushing into the rec room.

"She says there's a present for her in there?" Scout said, confused.

"Ach, knowing that doolally lass, it's probably a bag of human teeth that she thinks is a wee sack of toffees." Demolass sighed, rolling her eye. But when you poked your head around the door, you saw that there really was a package there for the firebug.

"What manner of disgusting things could she be purchasing?" Spy shuddered. Pyro opened the box, and pulled out... Some pink dango?

You were all puzzled as Pyro took out a variety of snacks from the box. There were wafers shaped like fish, pancakes with red bean filling, spicy rice crackers, cute pink dango, and some dried fish powder.

"Well ah never, she's only gone and ordered herself some Japanese treats!" Engie grinned. "And I thought she'd brought home a roadkill squirrel again."

"Hudda-huh."

"A subscription service? You get one every month?" Scout translated.

"Yuh-huh! Hudda uh-nuh-huh-uh." As Pyro pulled a glass bottle of lemonade out the box, she pointed to last month's box, atop the fridge.

"Yer didn't like last month's?" Demolass asked, pulling the box down. Inside was a bottle of sake, with two little cups.

"Uh-hudda-buh."

"Aye, so it's a suprise each month."

"Uh-hudda!"

"I can have it cause ye nae like sake?"

"Yuh-uh."

"Ach, thanks lassie! Ah won't complain next time ye bring home a dead bunny... As long as ye put it in Spy's bed."

And on that note, Tara went to add the bottle to her drink cabinet.

That evening, you got a knock on your bedroom door. You opened it, to see Tara in her tartan PJ pants and the old Biffy Clyro shirt she wore as nightwear.

"Nightcap?" She offered. "Ah heard about you and Soldier and Xander at it a few nights ago... She said she'd like to watch us."

"She's a voyeur?" You asked. "Well, sure, Demo... I'd like to taste your liquor."

The Scotswoman grinned, and led you back to her room. Soldier was already there, in her plan white sports bra and US-flag panties, sitting on the bed.

"LADIES! I wish to watch you two COPULATE! And it is your American duty to DRINK LIKE FISH as you did so!" She yelled. Demolass glanced over to her drinks cabinet, and noticed the newly acquired bottle of sake. She raised an eyebrow, and turned to you.

"Y/n, get ye clothes off. Ah've had an idea." She said, picking up the sake bottle. "Have ye ever heard of wakame Sake?"

"No, what's that?" You asked, fiddling with your bra clip. Soldier yanked your jeans down as Demolass stripped naked, and tucked her kinky curls back with her tartan headband.

"So, ye press yer thighs together, and sit up straight. Yer legs and pubis mons are gonna form a wee cup, and I'll pour the sake down yer tits and into the cup, then ah'll drink up! It gets the name because yer pubes will float around like seaweed." That sounded amazing! You felt a tingle of wetness run through your pussy, and you grinned in anticipation.

"THAT SOUNDS FUN! I SUPPOSE NOT EVERY GOOD IDEA IS AMERICAN IN ORIGIN!" Soldier yelled in response, which was high praise from her.

"If it's a wee bit too much, we can just..."

"Demo, I want to do this with you." You said, taking her hand. "I can literally make you drunk off my pussy, what's not to like?"

"Bold to assume I'm nae already drunk." She grinned. "But sit up now, lass, and ah'll really get ye wet."

You gave a little gasp as the cold sake hit your skin, in the valley of your mons and thighs. Tara poured the alcohol down the valley of your breasts, and took a deep swig from between your legs, savouring the taste.

"Feck, that's some strong stuff... How I like it." She purred. "Take a swig, I want ye tae taste it as ah taste ye." You filled your mouth with the strong rice wine, feeling it burn with that hand-sanitizer stig, and she pressed her lips to yours to drink deeply from you.

"Stars and Stripes! You two are the second most sexy ladies I have ever seen!" Soldier gasped, going ham on her clit with a vibrator.

"Who's number one?" You asked.

"There is only one lady who I could find the sexiest! And that is Lady Liberty! I have squirted GALLONS to the mere thought of her titanic turquoise tits!"

You snorted with laughter at the thought, but Demolass just grinned.

"How about I take a body shot from ye?" She purred. Soldier yanked off her clothes and passed Tara a salt shaker and a lime slice. She put a line of salt on the patriot's breasts, and slid the lime slice into her mouth. Then, she poured tequila over her stocky abs.

"Oh fuck yes..." You grinned, flicking your clit. This was going to be good! The Demolass licked the salt from John's breasts, before slurping the tequila from her and, and pressing their lips together to squeeze the lime. Your thighs trembled at the noises both of them were making, and you came hard. Tara ground on John's thigh and gave a stifled gasp as she too came, and Soldier let out a moan through gritted teeth as she reached her peak. However... She still had some lime in her mouth, and a little squirt got into her eyes.

"Screaming eagles! I'm blinded! The damn commies have brainwashed my limes!"

The three of you sat in the medbay at 11pm as Medic gave Soldier an eyebath. She was in her white silky nightgown and a long white robe with feathers, her feet in fuzzy white slippers that looked like doves and her hair up in curlers. She was glaring at the three of you as she finished rinsing Soldier's eyes, and as you were wearing each other's nightclothes, she could guess what you had been up to.

"Doktor is coming to bed?" Heavy called, in just her t-shirt, girl boxers and nightcap.

"Ja, in a minute, mein bärin. Once I have dealt with zese horny Dumkopfts!" Soldier got up and saluted her, and as you were about to leave, Medic placed her hand on your shoulder and whispered some tantalising words.

"Don't be a stranger, y/n. Me and Masha would love to have someone keeping the bed warm between us... Hoo hoo!"

And on that note, she skipped off to her quarters.

Chapter Text

You weren't expecting anything when you came downstairs for breakfast the next day, only to see all the Mercs (bar Scout and Pyro) sitting at the table, in their underwear, staring at you lecherously.

"Um... Morning?" You said. You were used to cocoa pops in the morning, not half-naked women.

"Sit down, Mon petit chou." Spy said, a cigarette trailing smoke from her lips. "So, after last night's activities, ze whole team now knows you have been sleeping around with all of us."

Your face blazed with heat, and looked down shamefully. Oh god... They thought you were a cheater. You didn't want this to happen at all! Now they were going to hate you! A tear ran down your cheek, and you were surprised as Heavy pulled off her scarf and dried your eyes with it.

"Y/n do not be crying..." She said, looking concerned.

"Aren't you mad at me? For sleeping around?" You sniffed.

"Mad? Why would we be cross, Sheila? You never said you wanted to date just one of us." Sniper said.

"Sugar, we all like ya. Even Scout, she's just sleepin' in." Engie smiled.

"Which I am glad for, because what I plan to do to you is not ze sort of things one does in front of her daughter." The Spy purred.

"You cheese-eating art-appreciating snail-lover! We are ALL going to have a turn on y/n, for she is the finest little slut this team has ever met!" Soldier barked. Your eyes widened, and heat pooled between your legs.

"You mean... You're going to run a train on me!" You exclaimed.

"Oui. And I shall go first, since I might as well give you ze best fuck of your life first." Spy smirked, taking your hand and lying you over the table.

The mercenaries behind Spy crowded around, some watching eagerly and some spitting dirty talk, as the sleuth slinked towards you. You pulled down your PJ pants, and she ran her hands over your breasts.

"Mmmm... Tres bon. You are a good little puppy for me, aren't you?" She teased. She was wearing white lacy lingerie, and she looked absolutely beautiful, like a work of art. She pulled down her knickers and straddled you, pressing her pussy to your face as she licked your clit.

"Mmmm, magnifique!" She purred. "Keep eating my pussy, there's a good girl. Let me give you orgasm after orgasm- killing you slowly with le petit mort." You would gladly die several hundred little deaths to feel her pussy on your lips, and you moaned into it.

"Oui, yes! Good girl!" Spy stuck her tongue in your hole and slurped lewdly at it, and you couldn't hold back any longer. You came, gushing around her tongue, and she drank it down like fine wine with a little gasp. The Spy reached her peak and soaked your face in her juices, before climbing off on wobbly legs.

"You do very well as a little sex-pet, my love. Let's see how well you handle the others... Au revoir!" She teased, before kissing your cheek and heading to her smoking room. You took in the other six Mercs, and opened your legs wide.

"Bring it." You said with a grin.

Heavy was next, clomping forward. She wore stockings and black boxers, with a black chest harness and her gloves. She'd taken off her scarf, so her short brown hair hung to her jaw.

"Such tiny pretty y/n... Heavy make feel good." She said, kneeling before you and opening your legs. Heavy pressed her lips to your pussy and started to lick away, savouring your cunt's wetness and the remnants of your last orgasm. She let out little "nomnomnom" sounds as she ate, and you heard a Bostonian accented laugh from behind her. Scout had joined the orgy at last, waiting for her turn.

"I knew you was a big eater, but you're eatin' up that snatch like it's a Sandvich!" The skinny lass laughed.

"Silence, tiny girl. Heavy likes to eat- especially pussy." Heavy wrapped her lips around your clit and held your wrists down with her strength, making you moan. Oh, you loved how strong she was!

"If ya ate more pussy and less Sandviches, you'd probably be less fat!" Scout jibed.

"Silence, you little schlampe!" Medic barked. "Frau Masha is beautiful... She is big, buff, butch and so very zaftig... My glans clitoris tingles just thinking of her." Medic's hand trailed down, and she started to rub Heavy's clit.

"Who's a good girl for her Doktor? Show Frau Doktor how good you are, Heavy, cum on my fingers." She hissed into Heavy's ear before nibbling her earlobe. The butch Siberian moaned, eyes rolling back. She loved submitting for her Medic... She would do anything for a taste of Mistress Heidi's pussy, or her strap-on, almost as much as she loved dominating the Medic and making her scream with bliss.

"Whatever. I'm gonna make y/n cum faster than you and sputnik combined." Scout jeered. Heavy pinched your nipple as she sucked away, and you gasped, back arching. Heavy bucked on Medic's fingers, and she groaned your name as she gushed. You came as she did, watching her eyes roll and her huge muscular arms stiffen.

"That was good, y/n... Heavy is feeling so good..." She pulled away, and you had a few moment's respite, before you felt a gloved finger trailing up your thigh.

"Hallo Fraulein!"

Medic was once again dressed like a dominatrix, in her heeled boots, albeit with a shiny black leather sleeveless dress that laced up at the front, and her white coat and red gloves.

"Prepare for your examination." She grinned wickedly, pulling up her skirt. She wore no panties, and the mad doctor pressed her pussy onto yours, making you moan.

"Does mein kleiner schlampe need her orgasm?" Medic cooed.

"Yes..." You gasped, feeling her cunt rut against yours.

"Yes what?"

"Yes Mistress!" You added.

"Vell, I am going to make you cum so hard zat you see stars. You are going to cum on my pussy like a good girl, and maybe zen, Frau Doktor shall give you a little cure for your hysteria- and squirt all over your pussy!" Medic rutted against you harder, red-lipsticked lips stretched in a mad grin, and she laughed like a woman possessed as you gasped and moaned like mad, begging "oohhhh fuck fuck fuck, so close, oh Medic, yes!" As she fucked away. The mad doctor gave a wild scream as she felt your cunt flex, and you squirted all over her, soaking the two of you in your juices. She bit her lip and cursed in several languages you didn't understand as she took came, soaking your thighs.

"Another successful procedure..." She teased. "After all this, I vill make sure you can have a lolly for being a good patient."

Next up was Demolass, who'd brought you some water.

"Ye look parched, lass, drink up." She said. "Were they too rough on ye?"

"I like it rough, but thanks." You said, taking the water and sipping it. She looks beautiful in a red silk negligee, with sparkly stockings that glittered against her dark legs like bubbles in a fine champagne. She'd even swapped out her eyepatch for one with rhinestones on it.

"Well, ah'm going tae go gentle on ye. Because I dinnae think John is."

"Affirmative! I am going to fuck you hard like the magnificent slut you are!" Soldier barked.

"Yeh've had her three nights in a row, yeh're the slut!" Demolass joked. "But enoof a'that, let me fuck ye." She kissed your clit, and started to passionately make out with your pussy, drinking down your juices like a fine whisky.

"Oh Taraaaa..." You gasped as her hands reached up to toy with your nipples.

"Aye, mah wee firecracker? Ah'm going tae make you blow up, in the fun way, that is."

"You're going to put a dynamite in her pussy?!" Scout gasped, making the Demolass howl with laughter. You laughed too, which soon turned to moans, and you wailed as you gushed around her tongue.

"Aye, that's a good lass! Ah'm close!" Tara fingered herself as she kissed and sucked your breasts, breathless and sweaty.

"There's something ah've always wanted tae say in sex... When ah'm cumming... Oh feck! Shit! K... KABOOOM!"

You howled with laughter, and Tara joined in. She kissed your cheek and slid off, for Scout to dash in next. Sniper was sitting back and watching you get fucked- she obviously wanted to go last.

"Oh yeah! Sex time!" Scout yelled. She was wearing thigh-high white stockings and a red baseball jersey, which she tugged up. There was a dainty double ended strap-on under her jersey, and she fingered you until you were wide enough for it.

"Ha! Bonk!" She yelled as she hilted it in you. "Ya like that? Ya like my big Boston basher in ya? I bet it's way better than a drooling drunk, or sawbones rubbing her schnitzel on your sauerkraut."

"Oooh fuck!" You gasped as the toy stretched you wide.

"That's it, moan for me! I'm a sex bomb!" You decided to stroke her ego as she stroked your clit, and gave a loud moan.

"Ohhh Jenny... You feel so good!"

"Damn right!"

"You're too sexy! I love your noodle arms and constant yapping!"

"Dat's right, moan for me! Uuuugh!" Scout thrusted faster and faster, toying with your clit until you came after just a few minutes of fucking. She gasped, and moaned as she too came.

"So you are too fast in more ways than one?" Medic teased.

"Shuddup! But whoa, toots... That was good." Jenny sighed, pulling out. She kissed your boobs goodbye, and joined the others. You only had three mercenaries left, and you were looking forward to it.

Soldier was next, wearing green camo panties, some dogtags and her helmet, and nothing else.

"Missy! I am going to put you through your paces! Do you see these tits?"

"Yes." You replied.

"They are fantastic tits! I shall make you cum with these tits! They are great tits because they are MADE IN AMERICA!" She stuffed her boobs in your face and you eagerly sucked them as she rutted herself on your thigh, spreading her slick all over your leg.

"I love these legs! They must go on for miles!" She yelled, humping harder with her arms crossed. You sucked her big boobs, fondling her muscled abs, and the other Mercs commented on the two of you rutting.

"Ain't that a dandy sight?"

"Da, leetle y/n takes pussy so well..."

"Oh ja, she must've had absolute kilometres of strap-on pounded into her cunt!" Soldier gasped and moaned as you kept sucking, and stuck two fingers in your cunt.

"I'm cumming!" You moaned into her chest.

"Ohh cupcake, cupcake, I'm cumming too! I'm so close! What the... Ohh.. WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETREEEEEEE!" She screeched as she came hard on your thigh, soaking down to your knee.

You lay on the table, gasping with bliss. Engineer was next, and she looked gorgeous in red gingham lingerie trimmed with white ruffles, and white lacy stockings.

"Now sugar, lemme make ya feel real good." She purred, adjusting the strap on around her hips. "This here baby will rub on mah bits, and fuck yours nice and good too. You ok to take it?" She brushed your hair out of your face with her robotic hand, and you nodded.

"That's a good doll. It's all gonna be peachy keen." She smiled, lifting your legs and rubbing your breasts as she pushed her strap-on into you.

"Ooh Dot!"

"Ya like that, sugar? I sure bet ya do. Ya like having mah big ol' clit fuck ya hard."

"Ohhh yes... Engie, your clit is amazing." You gasped, calling the dildo a clit as you saw how much she grinned when you did.

"Ain't you a good girl! Ah love an obedient lil' filly like you. Course, I like doin' as I'm told too... I'd mighty love for ya to tie me up with a lasso, and I'll be as sweet as peach cobbler to ya."

"Enough cowgirl scheiße, just fuck ze girl!" Medic snapped.

"Oh alright... I'm gonna ride ya hard, filly."

You moaned as Engineer fucked you hard, her big breasts bouncing and her stomach jiggling, her thighs clapping against yours. Her auburn-brown hair hung around her head and she moaned loudly as she fucked away, biting her lower lip. The idea of a submissive Engineer was so cute, and you couldn't help but indulge her.

"That's it, cowgirl, ride me nice and good." You teased.

"Fffuck! Sugar!"

"Gimme a holler, that's a good girl. Gimme a real yee-haw as you fuck me with that clit of yours." You purred, and Engineer howled in bliss. The strap-on pounded away inside you, and you squirted around it as she gave her trademark holler, and came hard.

"Yippie-ka-ye-keeeeeyay-hi-yoohoo!" She yelled as she came, her juices squirting down her thighs. She pulled out with a gasp, and kissed your forehead.

"Y'all did real good." She smiled. "Only one left now, sugar. I'm sure ya can make her feel just as good."

Sniper stalked forward, and you drank in how gorgeous she looked. She was wearing a jaguar-print bikini that made her tanned skin pop against the golden pattern, bright as an outback sunset.

"Bend over, Sheila." She growled. Oooh, so she was going to be dominant? You liked that! You did as told, and Sniper gave a purr at the sight of your bared butt.

"Bloody hell... Absolutely delicious." She smirked, before surging forward and biting one of the cheeks. "You're a right beaut! That's it, Sheila... Spread those legs and show that needy lil' cunt for me." You did as ordered, and the Sniper strapped on a big dildo to fuck you with.

"Is that all for me?" You teased. She slapped your arse, and squeezed your breasts from behind.

"Be a good girl for Michelle." She growled as she eased the dildo into your stretched, soaking, absolutely fucked cunt. You gasped and moaned as you took her deep inside you, breathing in her wild scent of eucalyptus and BO and a bit of piss... But it was weirdly attractive on her. Sniper bit her lip as she bottomed out in you, before grabbing you by the shoulders and thrusting out, then in again hard, like two randy dingoes mating.

"Michelle!"

"That's it, Sheila, you loike that, don't yeh?" She spat. "Take it all!" Oi'm going to fuck ye hard in front of all these bloody Mercs, and once you're spent and dripping, oi'm going to squirt on your face! Like a koala markin' her territory!"

"Fuck!" You moaned. You writhed and wriggled under her like she was wrestling a crocodile or a huge python. And speaking of huge pythons- your pussy was stretched wide around her dildo, and you were racing towards orgasm. You gasped and grunted as she thrusted hard, scratching and biting like wild, and you threw back your head and wailed as you came around her, again and again and again. Sniper gave a grunt, pulled out, and yanked off her strap on. She ripped her bikini to shreds and sat on your face, pressing her hairy pussy against your lips and groaning, her hands behind her head to show off her pits. She stunk of sweat and extertion and sex, you were so fucking aroused that you came yet again. Sniper groaned and came on your face, her juices soaking into your hair as she did so.

"That's mah good Sheila." She grinned, kissing your cheek.

As all seven of you lay in a big cuddle pile, the Mercs idly kissing your breasts and thighs, you smelt something sweet and delicious. Pyro came trotting into the room with a box of cute cupcakes with pink frosting, and waved at you.

"Oh shite, get your clothes back on, she's asexual and hates sex." Demolass yelped. But Pyro just waved her hand to say "no worries!", and pulled off her mask. She was a Japanese woman in her mid-thirties, half her face covered in 25 year-old burn tissue, and the half of her head that had hair topped with spiky black locks. She waved and smiled at you, and offered you a cupcake.

"You can just call me Blaise. I don't want to have sex, but I like you, Y/N. Maybe we could go on dates? Or can I kiss and cuddle you?" She asked.

"Pyro, you can have all the cuddles you like." You grinned dopily. Nine women who absolutely adored you? This was utter bliss. And as if it couldn't get any better, Pyro promptly fed you a cupcake.

Chapter Text

You were heading back to base after a round of Capture the Flag, but when you headed in, you saw Mr Pauling and The Administrator there. The Administrator was glaring down at all of you as usual, a cigarette clamped between his thin lips.

"What have we done now?" Scout sighed. "If you're still mad about that time with the bread monster..."

"Negative. This is about something far more pressing- the Mann corporation is holding an annual gala next week, and we need two mercenaries to represent our work." He scanned the group of you, before his eyes settled on you.

"Ah... I think Y/N should be sent, as our latest recruit. And... Scout."

"What?! But I hate fancy formal shit!" The idea of flouncing around in a big ball gown made Scout want to throw up, and at a party full of snotty rich folk? At least you would be there with her, but that wasn't much comfort.

"The gala will be next week on Saturday, be ready and in formal wear at 7pm. You will be required to stay for an hour." The Administrator snapped, before heading off into the teleporter.

"Sorry, guys." Mr Pauling sighed before following him. Scout yelled a swear word, and kicked the wall in anger.

"Do you know what this means, Jennifer?" The Spy laughed.

"What? You're all gonna be sitting at home eating chips and laughing at the idea of me at some stupid posh people shit?"

"Well, oui.. but even better, it means I will have to take you and Y/N dress shopping! At that designer outlet mall!"

****

It was a sunny day the next day, and after recovering the intelligence, Spy drove the van down to the Teufort Designer Outlet Mall (site of the 1947 karate wizards Vs nuclear raccoons fight). The ten of you spilled out of the van, and she grabbed you and Scout by the ears and dragged you to a designer formal wear store.

"Bonjour! Do you have any red dresses?" She asked the girl at the till. "You see, my daughter dresses like a total slob. The only boyfriend she's ever had is some fried chicken gigolo. Her taste in girlfriends is alright though."

"Oh, sure!" The girl grinned, gathering up several dresses and handing them to Scout. Spy shoved her into a changing room, and sat on a small couch to see her in them. The first dress was red tulle and ruffles, and Spy groaned.

"Honestly! She looks like a stick of candy floss!" She sneered.

The next dress was red velvet with long sleeves.

"Velvet is for cakes, not dresses! Sacre bleu!"

Then, there was the red satin bodycon number with no straps.

"Non, non, non! Foul!"

Dress after dress went past, but none satisfied Spy, and Scout hated them all. She wasn't some girly girl! And you certainly couldn't play baseball in these stupid dresses! You were looking out the window out of boredom, and your eyes widened as you saw Heavy walk past with a bag of new books, and Medic eating a tasty looking doughnut. She saw you gazing at them, and closed her eyes, licking the pastry with a look of bliss. You knew that face- it was the one she made when eating pussy.

Sadist! You mouthed. You'd kill for a doughnut and a trot round a bookshop with Heavy right now, rather than be sitting here watching Spy insult dresses. Or you'd rather have Medic eating your pussy, but that's the default thought for any situation really. But just then, Scout gave a triumphant whoop.

"Oh yeah! I look great!"

You gasped at the sight of her in a dapper tux with a red waistcoat, and even Spy looked satisfied.

"Jenny, you look amazing!" You gushed. You didn't know she'd look so good in classy clothes!

"Say, Y/N, I think that sparkly one I tried on would suit ya." She grinned. You tried it on, and it fit wonderfully! Even if this gala was going to be awful, at least you'd look great- but nowhere near as good as Scout herself.

****

The night of the gala came, and it was dull beyond words. Scarlett and Iris Mann glared at each other, pouting their wizened mouths and squabbling like toddlers. Sheila was loud as ever, eating rare steak after rare steak, and The Administrator looked bored as hell. The BLU Soldier and Demolass sat across the table from you, and the four of you were itching to leave. Mr Pauling has said as you arrived that you only had to be here for an hour, and it was creeping closer and closer...

"Oh, fine, make yourselves scarce." The Administrator finally sniffed. You got up from the table with Scout, and started to walk home to 2fort from the fancy hotel that the gala was being held in (after she'd gone to the bathroom because she'd drank so much bonk). It was an hour's walk, and you had to hitch up your skirts so you didn't step on them.

"Well, that stunk." Scout complained. "Didn't even get dessert!"

"Think again." You grinned, and whipped out a little box from under your skirts. You'd passed by the kitchens on the way out and swiped The Administrator's dessert. It was a tasty-looking Boston cream doughnut, and Jenny's eyes widened.

"No way, toots! Ya rule! And it's one of my faves too! I gotta thank ya for this."

"How about a kiss?" You asked. Jenny raised an eyebrow, and her eyes slid over you in your formal dress.

"How 'bout more than just a kiss?"

The two of you hid behind a large rock, as although the road was quiet, you still needed to be careful. You and Scout mashed your lips together, kissing furiously, and she started to tug down your panties. The Bostonian lay on the ground and gazed up at your pussy, and you simply lifted your skirts and sat on her face.

"Oh shit, toots!" She gasped. Her pussy was already wet just at the thought of you using her mouth, and she gave a groan as you rutted on her tongue. You tasted tangy and sharp, your scrumptious pussy absolutely hypnotising her, and she ate like she was starving.

"Oh fuck, Jenny!"

"I'm all yours, baby! Ya like that? Ya like my tongue? Course ya do!"

"Oh my fucking god, Jenny! Yes!" You squealed. She reached up and grabbed your boobs, and you yanked her tie to keep her eating you out.

"You're so fucking hot in that suit... I wanna rip it right off you and finger fuck you." You growled. Jenny gave a loud wail at this, and you started to rub her pussy through her smart trousers.

"You going to cum? Are ya gonna cum, Jenny?"

"Yeah! I'm so fucking... Ooooh!" Jenny came as you rubbed her, her eyes rolling back and pussy fluttering in her boy shorts, and the sound of her wails pushed you over the edge.

"Goddamn, toots... That was hot." You and Scout were sitting on the rock, waiting for your clothes to dry (she had squirted a LOT) and she was nibbling at her doughnut as the sun went down.

"Perhaps tonight wasn't so bad after all." You mused.

"You know what, toots? I think this turned out pretty great! Aside from the gala itself."

"So, how vas it?" Medic smirked as you and Scout walked in, late at night. Heidi and Masha were on the sofa together in their PJs, eating ice-cream and watching Keeping up with the Macdonalds (a reality TV show about the inane lives of super-rich fast food mascots. In today's episode, Ronald had cheated on Star with Wendy, so she was getting him back by going to a movie premiere with Grimace. It's about as stupid as it seems)

"It was shit!" Scout grinned. "I'm so glad I went!" And the two of you hurried upstairs with a giggle, leaving the older women confused on the couch.

Chapter Text

A match was about to start, and you and the Mercs were getting your cosmetics on. Scout was wearing an awful wig, Spy was trying out a new hat, but since it was full moon, Heavy had a different idea.

"Am going to wear most terrifying cosmetic Heavy has." She declared, opening her locker. You peered in, and almost cracked up at what you saw.

"That's your scariest cosmetic?!" You giggled. Hanging in the locker was a pair of fairy wings, a plastic tiara and a pink glittery tutu.

"Da. Pretty little fairy princess is here to slaughter." Heavy said, adjusting her tiara and picking up Sasha. "Heavy is butch, da, but still has some feminine interests. Is there problem?"

"Absolutely not!" You replied, shouldering your backpack of ammo, as the doors opened and the battle started. You saw Medic dash past you, covering one half of her face with her gloved hand. What was she hiding? But you didn't have time to think about that, there was a fight to be won!

After the match (stalemate) you headed back in the van, your cosmetics still on. Soldier had her dorky robot costume on, and Heavy was adjusting her tiara.

"I didn't know a pretty princess could be so scary!" You grinned. "Shame we didn't win, but we didn't lose either... Your highness."

Heavy smirked, and raised an eyebrow. When you got back to the RED fort, everyone else headed in, but she clapped a hand down on your shoulder.

"Bedroom." She said, and you eagerly followed her to her room. Heavy sat on the bed, and patted the space next to her.

"Lie down. Fairy princess has idea." She said. You did so, and the two of you started to kiss. She slid down your trousers and panties, and took her own combat pants off too. It should've been bizarre, seeing the Siberian giantess wearing a tutu, tiara, wings and bulletproof vest with nothing covering her unshaved pussy, but it was so fucking hot. Even her skinny, rickets-withered legs looked hot to you, and she took each of your ankles in a meaty hand.

"Trib?" She asked.

"Please do..." You moaned, and she pressed her pussy to yours. Heavy yanked off her vest and pulled her shirt off, her breasts flopping out her bra, and you pressed your lips to them eagerly. You loved her big, sagging breasts, her wide areolae and thick belly. Heavy was no supermodel but she was so beautiful to you, and you moaned around her large nipple as you rubbed your pussies together. The pink tulle of her skirt rubbed against your belly as you rutted.

"Is team building... Make us better kamerads." She whispered in your ear. "Y/N is credit to whole team! Heavy wants to say thanks." She squeezed your nipples in her fingers and rubbed harder, pussy squelching and flaring against yours. You moaned against her nipple, squeezing her biceps, and you gave a shudder as you came over her.

"Fuck, Heavy!" You moaned. Heavy grunted as she reached her peak, then flopped back and pulled you into a bear-hug.

"Heavy loves little y/n." She stated.

"I love ya too, Masha." You replied. You stayed like that for a while, before you heard a loud crash from the basement.

"What was that?" You cried.

"Is full moon. Doktor's friend is here." Heavy said. You got out of bed, pulled your clothes on, and left the room to investigate.

"Y/n, be careful! She's unpredictable!" Heavy cried.

"Heavy, what's the worst that could happen?" You asked, heading down to the dark basement alone.