Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Penny sighs and watches the trees pass by through the window as the car speeds along. She’s going to miss the city. It’s not her fault that the last person willing to foster her lives in some crappy town in the middle of nowhere. Seriously, who names a town Uranium City? What next, Cyanide Village? 

Her foster mother - a woman in her early 30s - is probably only fostering to cope with the fact that her fiancé cheated on her and dumped her for another woman. She spent the whole first hour of their trip ranting about it. Still, she’s sweet, and she’s assured Penny that the people in Uranium are nice. Penny is still unsure.

Penny flops down sideways, lying across the three back seats. They’ve been driving for about three hours, and they’re not even halfway there. With a deep sigh, Penny closes her eyes and allows herself to drift off.

Penny wakes up to the feeling of her foster mother rousing her.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” she teases. Penny just groans and gives her a dismissive wave in response. Her foster mother frowns. “We’re here,” she says, getting out of the car silently. Penny feels slightly guilty now. She follows her foster mother out of the car. 

“Welcome to your new home!” she announces, making jazz hands as she stands in front of the house. It’s smaller than the kinds of houses you’d find in the urban areas Penny is from, but it has a sort of rural charm to it.

“It’s nice,” Penny admits, following her inside. She looks around a bit, then makes her way upstairs, eventually finding her room. It seems cozy enough. The wallpaper’s a similar colour to her eyes.

Penny sighs quietly, and sits on her bed. This is going to be an… interesting six months.

Penny, like pretty much everyone ever, never really liked school. In the city, she was always ostracized for being different. At least here in Uranium she’s not shoved around. Instead, no one seems to pay any mind to her outside of the occasional odd glances at the strange new kid. It’s the way she likes it, but still it makes Penny feel self conscious.

There’s a mad rush of students as the bell rings, and Penny almost gets knocked over multiple times. Pulling out her schedule, she tries to figure out where the hell room V8 is on the unlabeled map given to her. After about five minutes, she manages to find it, and awkwardly makes her way into the classroom, blushing a bit at all the stares she gets. The teacher doesn’t seem to care that she’s late. He just gives Penny a stern look, and continues talking about some sort of group activity. Penny zones out for most of it. She should probably try to get out of that habit. She’s only pulled out of her thoughts when she hears the scraping of chairs against the floor and people gather into pairs and trios. As expected, no one wants the new kid in their group. Penny decides to settle down in the corner and wallow in self-pity as she waits for the teacher to stick her in a group that'll be less than pleased to have her there, when…

“Mr Owens? As the amazing student I- we are, we’d like to have the new girl in our group!” Someone says. “Right, Connie?”

“Um. Right,” her friend agrees. The teacher lets out an exasperated sigh and beckons Penny over. She obeys, but shrinks back a bit at the sight of the two students that have volunteered to take her. A sweet looking girl with curly black hair in space buns, and a thin girl with straight ginger hair and concerningly neat uniform. In other words, menacing as hell.

“You’re the new student, right?” the taller of the two asks. Penny nods. “Nice to meet you! I’m Ocean O’Connell Rosenberg,” She greets, grinning proudly as she joins her hands behind her back and swivels left and right. “You’ve probably heard of me. Valedictorian, Class President, Head Student and lead singer of the Chamber Choir!”

Penny hasn’t heard of her. But she nods just to be polite. “Oh. Um, Penny Lamb. I’m Penny. The new student,” Penny replies, wincing at her own awkwardness. Ocean’s friend breaks the uncomfortable silence that follows. 

“I’m Constance!” Constance says, smiling reassuringly at Penny.

“Blackwood,” Ocean adds.

“Right. Constance Blackwood. Sorry.”

Penny watches their exchange in silence, feeling a bit like she’s intruding on something.

She continues to feel that way throughout the whole period. It’s awkward as hell. Constance makes a suggestion, Ocean shoots it down, and Constance apologises - she seems to apologise a lot. Every now and then Penny chips in. Ocean usually replies with “Good idea!” and never actually implements it. Eventually Penny gets the message and just shuts up.

With a sigh, Penny drops her bag next to her desk and flops onto her bed face first. Her first day at Uranium was… surprisingly okay. She didn’t make any friends - that’s to be expected - but the people here aren’t too bad. Even if that Ocean girl was a bit brash. Penny rolls onto her back and checks her messages. There are a few from her foster mother.

Dianne (Foster Mom)

Dianna:

Hello, Penny!

I work late, so help yourself to something
in the fridge if I’m not home before dinner.

Penny groans and puts down her phone. Then she wanders downstairs and finds some leftovers in the fridge. Good enough.

After staring out her window into the darkness for five minutes straight, Penny stretches, gets up, and yet again flops down onto her bed, this time pulling the covers over herself. She misses the city. Sure, she was bullied in school, and she spent most of her time being passed between foster homes, but she had friends, and people who cared about her. Clearly her friends weren’t as close to her as she thought - they’ve been leaving her on read since she left the city. She’s all alone now.

Penny feels tears prick at the corners of her eyes. Damn it. Pulling the blanket over her head, Penny forces the tears to go away as she scrunches her eyes shut in an attempt to sleep. Thankfully, it's not long before she begins to drift off.

Chapter Text

Ocean is awoken by the loud, obnoxious beeping of her alarm clock. Groaning, she sits up and stares blankly at the wall until her sleep-induced fatigue is gone. Then she notices the distinct lack of the smell of weed in the house, and almost instantly her spirits are lifted. At least they’re not here to interrupt her. Ocean does her usual, meticulously scheduled morning routine of brushing her teeth, straightening her hair and putting on her uniform, taking an extra five minutes to make sure it’s flawless , then leaves for school after grabbing a browning banana from the kitchen to serve as her breakfast.

She walks down the streets, the thin fabric of the uniform doing practically nothing to keep out the coldness of the winter. Still, it beats having to ride in her parents’ shitty crappy hippie van.

Earlier than Constance as always, Ocean wanders around the school aimlessly. She’s thinking of ways to keep her brain off of things and pack her schedule till it’s bursting at the seams, when gentle humming fills her thoughts. Searching for the source, she spots Penny Lamb sitting alone on some steps humming a tune and reading a book. Ocean’s interest is piqued. Penny's voice is undeniably beautiful. Without even thinking twice, Ocean walks up to her.

“Your name's Penny, right?” Ocean asks.

Penny startles and looks up at Ocean, then nods.

“You have a really nice singing voice. You should join the St. Cassian Chamber Choir!” she announces proudly, ignoring the bemused look on Penny’s face. If she plays this right, maybe she’ll get an award for being hospitable to the new student! There isn’t an award for that yet, but if it’s plausible she’s damn well gonna get it.

“...Okay,” Penny eventually answers, giving Ocean a shy smile. Ocean smiles back, though it comes off a bit faker than she intended.

“We have a session today after school. Come to the room with the stage, you shouldn’t miss it,” she adds, flashing Penny an attempt at a more professional smile, turning on her heel and walking away. Penny stares after her wondering what the hell just transpired.

Ocean sits on the edge of the stage as the other choir members enter. First Noel, then Constance, then Ricky. Ten minutes into practice, Mischa finally arrives. Mischa is always late, so it’s not much of a surprise. And then about fifteen minutes into practise, a certain brown-haired girl peeks her head in. The other choir members give her quizzical looks, but Ocean puts on one of her usual Most-Successful-Girl-In-Town smiles.

“Everyone,” Ocean announces, walking over to Penny. “This is our newest member! Penny- uh…” she casts a glance over at Penny.

 “Lamb,” Penny answers quietly.

“-Penny Lamb!” Ocean continues, acting unaffected. “Don’t forget to make her feel welcome!” With that, she drags Penny over to one of the seats. 

Penny doesn’t interact with the rest of the choir during the lesson. Like, at all. To the point that even Ocean forgets that she’s even there until she’s reminded by the presence of an extra voice in the harmonies.

After choir, Penny approaches Ocean with confusion and slight skepticism written all over her face.

“Thanks for letting me join your choir,” She says, tilting her head at Ocean. Ocean internally beams at the fact that Penny called it her choir, but outwardly she just flashes that same plastic smile she always uses.

“Well, of course I did. You have a good voice,” Ocean answers, nodding. Besides, it’s true. That is one of the reasons Ocean invited Penny to the choir. It’s just not the only one. She needs her awards, okay? They look good on her record. And having a good record is very important if she’s gonna be the future president of Canada.

Ocean blinks back into reality when she realises she’s kind of just been staring at Penny with a borderline maniacal grin on her face. Penny looks extremely uncomfortable.

“...right. Um… I should go home now,” Penny awkwardly speaks up, shuffling out of the room. Ocean nods, and begins to pack up the choir room.

That Penny girl is an odd one. Most new people at Uranium are all the same. They have no idea how things work, so they latch onto whoever is deemed popular or smart. Yet Penny is the opposite. She seems to be avoiding… Well, everyone, really. She simultaneously intrigues and frustrates Ocean. Ocean takes pride in her extensive knowledge in almost every topic. So of course, she doesn’t like things that she doesn’t understand. And unfortunately, this new girl falls directly into the category of “Things Ocean Doesn’t Understand”.

Sighing, Ocean grabs her bag and leaves the school. At least it’s less freezing now. She opens the door to her house, and retreats to her room. Searching through her bag, she pulls out some extra credit assignments and a pen, and gets to work. After about half an hour, the smell of weed fills the house. They’re home. Ocean pulls the collar of her uniform shirt over her nose and mouth.

This is going to be a long night.

Chapter Text

Penny lies on her bed and stares up at her ceiling, humming a tune to herself as she ponders topics as they enter her head. She still hasn’t made any friends despite having been at Uranium for a whole two weeks, but knowing herself, she’s not too surprised. Besides, she already knows how this whole fostering thing’ll go. Her foster mom won't want her, and she’s just gonna go back to being sent from foster home to foster home. At least the choir is friendly to her. Though Ocean is… off. Sure, she lets Ocean sit with them before school and during breaks, but her smiles are always fake, and she’s somewhat condescending towards Penny. She knows Ocean probably has some ulterior motive, but she has no idea what. 

Penny used to hate the constant noise of the city. But now she misses it more than anything. She’s only been here two weeks, yet hearing something as simple as a car honk is already enough to worsen the longing for her old life. Thankfully, road rage is rare in a small town such as Uranium. Still, hearing sounds so reminiscent of the bustling streets of the city almost feels like some deity above is taunting her. 

After being lost in her thoughts, her alarm clock goes off. She’s not sure why she still sets it, she wakes up half an hour before it beeps anyways. Sighing, Penny gets up and lazily pulls on her uniform, before disembarking on the short five minute walk from her house to school. English. Free Period. Physical Education. Maths. Science. Penny goes from class to class almost robotically. Like all the rest, this day passes as a surreal blur, and the end-of-school bell rings in no time. Penny makes her way to the Choir Room with a tired sigh.

She sits in the back unnoticed, as has become her routine. Like always, she lets her thoughts drift. Unfortunately, it quickly goes from thinking about Christmas coming up to what her friends would be doing, which turned into missing her old life again. Penny feels tears prick at her eyes again. Her friends don’t respond to her messages anyways, so she’s stopped trying now. Her foster mother doesn’t even take the time to talk to her - admittedly, Penny’s own fault for pushing her away. If Penny were to die, no one would care (apart from maybe her foster mother, but only because it would cause trouble). Penny’s truly alone. Insignificant.

Excusing herself just before the tears start actually flowing, Penny makes her way into a supply closet and wipes them away. Then someone knocks on the door.

“Penny? Are you in there?”

Penny knows that Voice. Ocean. She stays quiet and waits for her to leave, but she’s betrayed by a weak sob that escapes throat. The door opens. Ocean is giving her a very surface-level look of sympathy, which for some reason feels even worse than the condescending pity she was expecting.

“Are you okay?” Ocean asks, closing the door behind her. Penny nods and averts her gaze.

“Mhm. I’m ok,” Penny answers.

Ocean has no idea how to comfort people. It’s not usually her place. But this is the new girl, and if this means she knows more about the strange enigma that is Penny Lamb, then damn well is she gonna try.

“Are you okay?” Ocean asks, shutting the door behind her. She tries not to wince at how awkward her words sounded. It’s pretty obvious she hasn’t had to sound comforting too often. Penny seems to have picked up on it too, since she averts her gaze and nods.

“Mhm. I’m ok,” she answers. She’s very much not okay. She’s crying. Ocean just gives her a blank look. “...Just a little homesick,” Penny adds, still looking away. “Don’t worry about me.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Ocean asks. Penny finally meets her gaze, and Ocean shoots her the friendliest smile she can muster.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Ocean asks, smiling. Penny gathers the courage to meet her gaze. Ocean has an ulterior motive, and she’s doing horribly at hiding it. But it wouldn’t hurt to vent about it. Right?

“I miss my old life,” Penny admits, having long given up on wiping her tears away. “I just… uh… this place is so different . I never liked how noisy the city was, but here it’s too quiet. It feels empty,” she explains, picking at her fingernails. Ocean nods. Penny continues.

“My friends won’t answer my messages. I’ve kind of uh… given up on trying. I thought we were close, but I guess not. My foster mom won’t talk to me because I was a jerk and screwed everything up, I don’t know anyone in this town, and the only people I know are a gazillion kilometres away,” she adds, forcing a humorless chuckle. She picks at the wooden floor to distract herself from her tears, and in the corner of her eye she can see Ocean’s expression soften.

“Oh,” Ocean says again. “I’m sorry,” she adds stiffly.

Penny hums, and gives Ocean a guilty look. “Sorry. For dumping all this on you,” she says shyly. Ocean musters the best comforting look she can.

“Don’t worry. I can tell you needed it.”

Penny nods, and half-smiles at her. Even if she knows it probably didn’t come from a place of genuine concern, the comforting presence feels nice. Ocean smiles back, and Penny notices in spite of its usual plasticity, it’s more genuine than her usual ones. Maybe Ocean isn’t so bad after all. 

Chapter Text

Ocean sighs as she makes her way over to her house. She frowns when she spots the hippy van in the driveway. Damn it. She didn’t get home in time. Maybe she shouldn’t have stayed back to help Father Marcus pack up. Ocean awkwardly opens the door and pulls the collar of her shirt over her face again. Her parents, unfortunately, notice her.

“Ocean!” Her father calls. Ocean winces, and slowly turns to face him. “Where the hell were you? You’re meant to be home by now!” he scolds, his voice slurred. Ocean scoffs. It’s not like he actually cares when she comes home from school.

“Choir took longer than usual, okay?” She hisses, crossing her arms and regretting it the second the words leave her mouth.

“I don’t appreciate that attitude,” Her father snaps, standing up and walking over to Ocean. She glances over to her mom for help, but her mother is zoned out on the couch in a drug-induced daydream. Ocean considers making a break for it, but a hand grabbing her wrist puts an end to that plan.

“We give you a roof over your head. We give you clothes. We let you go to school. You should be grateful,” He hisses, leaning in to Ocean and glaring at her. 

Ocean looks down at the floor. “I’m sorry,” She murmurs. A hand slams into the side of her face, letting her know that her apology wasn’t accepted. Daring to look up at her father, the look of seething rage on his face is enough to make her rush up the stairs and shut the door, making sure to bring a chair in front of it as an extra precaution. 

“Open the damn door!” Her father screams, pounding against the wood so hard Ocean’s sure it won’t last long. “Open the door, you brat!”

Ocean whimpers and tugs her window open, eventually managing to get it open enough for her to squeeze past. She begins to wriggle through, then feels a chair make contact with her back. She gasps and almost falls forward, but she’s yanked back into her room before that can happen.

“I’m sorry!” Ocean gasps, backing away from her father.

“Could you come down here, honey?” Ocean’s mother calls. Casting one last glance towards Ocean, her father sneers and makes his way downstairs. Ocean slowly relaxes. Clearly if there is a god, he’s looking out for her today.

Taking a deep breath, Ocean pulls herself up onto her bed with shaky arms, and curls up. 

Ocean manages to pull her sore body out of bed and into the bathroom. She’s looked better. She has a black eye where her father hit her, and there’s a shallow wound on her back from the corner of the chair. Nothing she hasn’t had to handle before. 

Ocean sighs and peels off her dirty uniform in favour of the clean uniform waiting in her drawer. She can’t afford to ruin her perfect attendance record. Besides, she can just smuggle some bandages from the nurse’s office once she gets to school. For now, she forces herself to change. The dried blood makes things difficult. But she can handle it. She always has.

Penny sits on the steps just outside of the school hall with the rest of the choir, waiting for Ocean. Finally, the door opens, and footsteps are heard. Unfortunately, it’s just Mischa.

“Where’s ginger?” Mischa asks, tilting his head as he rounds the corner. Everyone looks at Constance expectantly. She just shrugs.

“She’s normally early,” she says. 

Noel rolls his eyes. “Really? Wow. Who'd've thought?”

“Maybe she’s running late?” Penny suggests quietly. 

Noel laughs. “If you really think that, you don’t know Ocean.”

“Maybe Choir is cancelled and she forgot to tell us?” Ricky signs. No one understands him. He sighs in frustration and goes back to reading his comic book.

“Wait! I’m here!” a voice suddenly pipes up, and Ocean comes rushing over to them. Mischa bursts out laughing, and Penny stifles a snicker.

“Why do you look like that?” Noel snorts. Ocean has her hair swept over one of her eyes, and she’s wearing the red uniform sweater over her shirt. 

Ocean huffs and looks away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” she snaps.

“You do, Мудак,” Mischa retorts, also laughing.

Ocean just frowns. “It’s just a hairstyle!” she insists.

“It looks awful on you!” Noel teases.

Ocean grumbles out a “Choir’s cancelled,” and storms out of the room with her face bright pink. Noel and Mischa leave laughing. Ricky grins as he stays and keeps reading the comic, and Constance follows Ocean. Penny stands there in confusion for a while, then follows. She hears Ocean and Constance talking in one of the rarely used bathrooms.

“It’s fine, Constance. Really.”

“Ocean! You could’ve been badly hurt!”

“Constance, it’s-”

Penny interrupts by entering the room. Constance looks between Ocean and Penny in silence, while Ocean panics and covers her black eye with her hand. Though her sweater is off, so there’s not much she can do to hide her other injury.

“...What happened? Are you okay?” Penny asks quietly, staring wide-eyed at Ocean. Ocean averts her gaze and lowers her hand in favour of unsuccessfully trying to hide the wound on her back.

“Her parents… weren’t in a good mood last night,” Constance answers, causing Ocean to glare at her.

“Constance! Shush!” She hisses, casting a weary glance towards Penny. Penny gives Ocean a sympathetic look and slowly approaches her, reaching out. Ocean flinches and shuffles away, and Penny retracts her hand.

“They hurt her?” Penny asks. Silence. She notices the first aid kit in Constance’s hand. Penny’s gaze shifts between Ocean and Constance, and eventually she breaks the uncomfortable silence. “Can I help? I know a bit of first aid,” she asks, gesturing to the stolen first aid kit. Constance and Ocean exchange confused glances, and Constance nods, much to Ocean’s dismay.

“Constance!” Ocean scolds again, though she’s well aware scolding Constance won’t change anything.

Constance rummages through the contents of the bag, and pulls out some disinfectant. Penny grabs a paper towel from the dispenser, pours the disinfectant on, and dabs it over the gash on Ocean’s back. Ocean inhales sharply and winces, but makes no other noises.

By the time the bell rings, Ocean’s injury has been disinfected and bandaged about as well as inexperienced sixteen and seventeen-year-old girls in a school bathroom could do. After packing up, the three part ways to go to their separate classes.

Penny stuffs her pencil case into her bag, as well as her math assignment, then gets up from her seat. She stares at the ground, lost in daydreams as she makes her way out of the school, then bumps into a certain Head Student.

“Ocean! Um, sorry!” Penny quickly apologises, and tries to make her way around Ocean, but Ocean stops her.

“Wait,” she says, blocking Penny’s path. “Thanks. For this morning. You didn’t have to help…”  she continues, swivelling around with her arms crossed. “...but you did. So thank you.”

Penny smiles. “It’s nothing,” she chirrups. “That’s what friends do!”

Ocean blinks in surprise. Penny's well aware they’re not friends. More like… friendly acquaintances, but she doesn’t say anything to correct herself. She just maintains uncomfortable eye contact with Ocean for a while, before Ocean gives her a small smile.

“Right. Friends. Huh,” she murmurs, her voice indicating she’s lost in thought. Penny takes the opportunity to slip past her and walk home.

She still has no clue why she said that. Though she has a feeling she’s not going to regret it. Yet.

Chapter Text

Ocean wanders through the hall, earlier than Constance as usual. Except this time she’s not wandering around aimlessly. She’s searching for Penny. She’s already checked the stairwell and all of the closets. Of course, there is the possibility that Penny didn’t show up, but Ocean decided that’s unlikely. She needs to talk to Penny.

She didn’t think a single word could affect her so much, yet she spent the entirety of the previous night thinking about it. “Friends”. Penny had called Ocean her friend. Sure, they’d been friendlier towards each other ever since Penny vented to her last week, but she didn’t think they could be considered friends . Ocean isn’t sure why she’s making such a big deal out of it. Maybe because she only really has one friend, and even then they’re not all that close. She avoids thinking about it, but deep down she’s aware that her relationship with Constance can’t even really be called a friendship. It’s more of mutual gain. Hell, it’s barely even mutual, but Ocean ignores that bit too. The point is, no one has actually wanted to be Ocean’s friend since 6th grade. Yet when Penny said it she seemed genuine.

Ocean stops in her tracks when she hears a familiar voice humming. She whips around, looking for the source, and spots Penny sitting up in a tree, reading the same book she had when Ocean invited her to the choir. Ocean didn’t even know people climbed trees anymore. Isn’t that only something children do? Maybe Penny has some sort of stunted brain development. That would explain why she’s rarely ever heard from. And why she gets on so well with Ricky.

“What are you doing up there?” Ocean calls out. Penny startles, and her gaze frantically darts around, before it settles on Ocean and she relaxes.

“Hanging out,” Penny answers cooly, as though she hadn’t had a mini panic attack five seconds ago. Ocean huffs.

“In a tree?”

“It’s relaxing. No one bothers me up here.”

“I suppose that makes sense.”

Penny smiles at her, and shifts her position to offer a hand to Ocean. “Join me?” 

Ocean gives her a skeptical look. “It doesn’t seem very comfortable.”

“It’s not. Now are you coming up here or not?” Penny questions. With an exasperated sigh, Ocean takes Penny’s hand with her good one and climbs up rather clumsily. They sit in silence for a while.

“How’ve you been?” Penny asks eventually, not looking up from her book.

“Since when?”

“Y’know. Since yesterday.”

Ocean sighs and looks down at the ground. “I’ve been alright,” she eventually answers, before finally asking the question that’s been plaguing her mind for the last 16 hours. “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“You called me your friend yesterday. Did you mean it?”

“I dunno. I think so,” Penny admits, shrugging. 

Ocean hums thoughtfully. She doesn’t know what else to say. It seems Penny doesn’t either. They return to their comfortable silence.

Friendships. Ocean is an expert on a lot of things. Unfortunately, friendship isn’t one of them. Friendship is also on the list of “Things Ocean Doesn’t Understand”. Surely she can’t be too bad at it, though. After all, she’s maintained her friendship with Constance for five years.

Yeah, she’s bad at it.  Turns out grades and humanitarian efforts isn’t a good small talk topic when it comes to friends. Come to think of it, she’s never really had to maintain her friendship with Constance. Constance has always just… stuck around.

Ocean can’t believe she’s doing this. It’s not in her nature to ask for help. But she needs things to go perfectly - less because she genuinely wants to be a good friend and more because she just needs another thing to be good at. It just needs to go perfectly.

“Nooooeel…?” Ocean asks, drawing out his name and forcing a grin onto her face. He’s the only one she could ask. Mischa is, well, Mischa; he’s probably gonna go to jail for offering his friends drugs or something. Ricky… he’s a real sweet kid, but his brains are mush. He probably doesn’t know the first thing about friends. If Constance were good with friendships, she and Ocean would probably be closer. Which unfortunately leaves Noel.

“Ew. Don’t smile. It looks weird on you,” Noel scoffs. Ocean glares at him. “There. That’s better,” he adds.

“Can I….” Ocean sighs. She looks like merely saying the words are causing her physical pain. To be fair, they probably are. “...Ask you for some advice?”

Noel smirks. “You? Asking me for advice? This is gold.”

“Just shut up. I need help with Penny,” Ocean hisses, scowling at him. 

Noel grins. “Ah, finally had your gay awakening?”

“What? Gross! I don’t like girls, Noel.”

“Damn. You got my hopes up for a moment. Guess I’ll have to wait a bit longer.”

Ocean rolls her eyes. “ As I was saying , I need help maintaining my friendship with Penny.”

Noel crosses his arms and smirks. “Really? That’s what you’re struggling with? Wow,” he mocks, then sighs. “Be nice to her. Don’t treat her like you treat Constance if you want an actual good friendship.”

“Constance and I do have a good friendship!”

Noel raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t argue back. “Just hang out with her or something. It’s not my problem,” he says, then wanders off before Ocean can make a witty retort. Ocean scoffs and goes to find Penny.

Penny is spotted in the same tree she had been sitting on earlier that day. Ocean walks up to her, going over the advice Noel gave her - which is surprisingly not half-bad, considering it’s from Noel. Be nice. ‘Hang out’ with her. Seems easy enough.

“Oh, Ocean! I was looking for you earlier! Can I ask you something?”

Ocean looks up at Penny, and tilts her head. “Go ahead.”

“So uh… my maths assignment’s due date is coming up, and…” Penny sighs, looking embarrassed to be saying it.

Ocean’s confusion turns into a look of intrigue. “And? Why exactly are you telling me this?”

“Well, I’m kinda… struggling? And you’re, like, the most successful girl in town,” Penny continues. “So I was wondering if you could help me? Like, if you’re free?”

Ocean hums contemplatively, then nods, grinning at Penny. “Of course!”

Well, the whole ‘hang out’ thing just got a whole lot easier.

Ocean’s room is scarily neat. Though, it’s Ocean , so everything about her is scarily neat.

Penny still doesn’t know why the hell she called Ocean her friend. On the bright side, at least she actually has someone in this backwater place - even if said someone isn’t exactly the nicest girl in town. Penny knows there must be an actual human being somewhere in there. She caught a glimpse of it yesterday - both in the bathrooms and after school.

Penny does her best to not zone out as Ocean explains how to use various fractions in algebra or whatever, though her attention is somewhat maintained by the fact that Ocean herself seems to be lost in thought as she explains things. 

After what feels like a whole damn hour, the pondering look in Ocean’s gaze fades and gives way to a smirk.

“Penny Lamb,” She says simply. Penny awkwardly looks around, then back at Ocean, shooting her a questioning look. “Why don’t we work out an arrangement?” Ocean continues.

“An arrangement?”

“Yep! One night a week, I help you study for whatever topics you need. In return, you support me. It's easy. Just vote for me to be high school president, say good things about me to the teachers, assist me with group projects, things like that. How does that sound?”

Penny blinks in surprise. Where the hell is this coming from? Though it is tempting. The curriculum in Uranium is so different, she’s gonna need more than just one impromptu after school study session to catch up. And Ocean is the top student…

“Deal,” Penny says. Ocean’s smirk grows into a grin as they shake hands.

Chapter Text

According to Constance, Monday is Ocean’s birthday. When questioned about it, Ocean insisted that Penny shouldn’t bring her anything. Unfortunately for Ocean, no matter what she says, Penny is going to bring her something. 

Which is why Penny is wandering around in the snacks aisle of the nearest supermarket. Even if Ocean doesn’t want a present, she never said she doesn’t want snacks. Penny scans the shelves for something Ocean might like. Nothing super sweet like marshmallows, because it’s Ocean. But not bland, because it’s a birthday. Penny hums a tune to herself, and eventually grabs some chocolate chip cookies. As she makes her way to the cashier, she notices a small chocolate cake, and she just can’t resist. She grabs the cake along with some small candles, and slides them over to the cashier.

Throughout Monday, Penny bides her time. Her grades have already gone up thanks to Ocean, and she makes sure to say something about how smart or responsible or nice Ocean is whenever she interacts with the teachers.

When choir practice rolls around, Penny actually sings at the same volume as everyone else and actively participates - something that seems to surprise Ocean. After choir practice, Penny sticks around to help Ocean pack up. She hums that same tune to herself, and eventually taps Ocean on the shoulder.

“Ocean?”

“Can I hel-?”

“Happy Birthday!”

Ocean glances over at Penny, clearly stunned. “Oh. Thanks...”

“If you’re free after this, do you think you can come over to my house?” Penny asks, smiling.

“Hm? Sure.”

“I’ll get things ready! What’s your favourite colour again?”

“...It’s yellow.”

“Noted. See ya there!”

Penny walks along, occasionally checking behind her to make sure Ocean is still following. Eventually, she sighs and falls back, walking alongside Ocean.

“Hey,” she murmurs, offering Ocean a gentle smile. “You okay? Normally you talk a lot.”

Ocean glares at her, then sighs. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You don’t sound very ‘fine’,” Penny counters. Ocean doesn’t respond. She just averts her gaze. Penny’s face falls into a frown, and she gingerly reaches up to put a hand on Ocean’s shoulder. Ocean stiffens and eyes her cautiously, but doesn’t pull away. Penny smiles at her again.

“Mistletoe is actually a weed,” she pipes up, trying to fill the tense silence between the two. “It has white berries, not red. And the whole thing is poisonous.”

Ocean hums in acknowledgement, and shudders at the cold. Penny tilts her head.

“Why didn’t you bring your sweater?” she questions.

Ocean sighs. “It’s still in the laundry. The dried blood won’t come off.”

“But the sweater’s red.”

Ocean gives her an annoyed glance, and Penny takes it as her cue to just shut up. She removes her hand from Ocean’s shoulder and takes off her own sweater, before blocking Ocean’s path and pulling the sweater onto her. Penny smiles. “There. Now you’re not cold anymore.”

Ocean gives her a skeptical look but nods. Penny grins at her and keeps walking, humming a tune as Ocean catches up to her.

When they make it to Penny’s house, Penny rushes up to the front porch, fiddles with the lock, and holds the door open for Ocean. Ocean steps inside, followed by Penny. She guides Ocean over to the living room and sits her down, making sure she’s comfortable, then walks off.

Penny returns with the chocolate cake topped with yellow candles in the shape of a smiley face, singing a quick rendition of Happy Birthday. Ocean looks taken aback as Penny places the cake in front of her and hands her the knife.

“Go on! Cut the cake!”

“I don’t know if-”

“Just cut the cake. You can complain later.”

Ocean sighs, then cuts the cake into six slices. Penny grabs a plate and gives Ocean a slice.

“Thanks,” Ocean says, the faintest hint of a smile forming on her face. Penny grins and sits down next to her.

“I know you said you didn’t want presents, but I had to give you something ,” she says simply, handing Ocean the cookies. Ocean eyes them with interest before glancing back up at Penny. They descend into a comfortable silence, only broken by the scraping of cutlery as Ocean slowly eats the cake.

Penny just watches Ocean. Her hair and it glimmers in the light. It makes Ocean look like she's glowing.

“You’re staring at me,” Ocean remarks, looking up from her now-empty plate.

Penny’s gaze shifts down to Ocean’s eyes, and she nods. “Sorry. I zone out a lot,” She admits sheepishly, shrugging.

“I’ve noticed. You do it in choir a lot too,” Ocean replies, shifting her gaze back down to the plate. “Thanks. Usually my birthday is just merged with Christmas,” she says, quietly. Penny smiles at her and puts a hand on her shoulder, making Ocean tense again.

“Mine’s almost always mixed with April fools or Easter. It’s annoying. But you probably have it worse,” Penny says, shrugging. Ocean glances over at the clock, and her face falls. “You okay?” Penny asks.

“My parents’ll be home by now,” Ocean answers, leaning back and averting her gaze.

“Oh.” Penny eyes her with concern. “You can stay the night?” She offers, trying to smile. Ocean gives her a shocked look, but after a few moments seems to actually consider it.

“...I guess I can,” she answers. Penny flashes her a smile and gets up. She manages to find a spare mattress and a blanket, so she sets it down on the floor next to her bed, then grabs a pillow from underneath her bed. Before she makes her way downstairs, Penny searches through her drawers for some clothes for Ocean to wear. She finds a simple white shirt and some jeans. Good enough.

“Oce?” Penny calls as she hops down the stairs. Ocean gives her an unreadable look at the nickname. “You can put on these clothes. I dunno if they’ll fit you, but hey.”

Ocean slowly stands and takes the clothes, and Penny guides her to the bathroom so she can change.

The two make their way up to Penny’s room. Ocean goes over to the spare mattress, but Penny stops her.

“Ah-ah. Birthday girl gets to sleep on the bed,” Penny tuts, pushing Ocean in the direction of her bed.

“What? But it’s-”

“No buts. Sleep in the bed.” Ocean is about to make a comment, but stops herself and just crawls into Penny’s bed. Penny smiles at her and tucks her in, then curls up on the spare mattress. Ocean turns off the light, and before long it’s just the moonlight shining into the room. It makes Ocean look like she’s glowing once more.

“Happy birthday…” Penny whispers, smiling at Ocean before she drifts off.

Chapter Text

Penny hates going out and doing ‘fun’ holiday crap. Mainly because she hates socialising. Unfortunately, it being Christmas means she’s kind of obligated to get out and do stuff. Thankfully for her, everything else is over and done with, and the last thing on her list is the only thing she’s actually been looking forward to: The annual “Christmas Choir Hangout” that Constance seemed so excited about. Even Ocean stopped being as much of a prissy after Constance announced it on the last day of school. Which means it must be pretty good.

Penny selects a Christmas-y outfit - aka just black jeans, a black collared shirt and a christmas sweater - and makes her way downstairs, where her foster mother is waiting for her.

“Merry Christmas, Penelope!” She says cheerfully, holding out some mittens. “Don’t get too cold out there, dear!”

A warm smile creeps onto Penny’s face. At least her foster mother doesn’t completely hate her.

“Thanks!” she chirrups. Penny gives her foster mother a hug, then makes her way outside, going over Constance’s address in her head.

Ocean searches through her drawers for something to wear. School uniform, more school uniform, some plain worn down shirts… nothing appropriate for a christmas party. She moves on to her wardrobe, and eventually spots the only non-worn clothes she has: the clothes Penny gave to her on her birthday. She’d intended to return them, but she never got around to doing it.

Ocean pulls the clothes on, makes sure she looks neat and tidy, and to make it more Christmas themed she finds an old green-and-red scarf that she wraps around her neck. Penny’s clothes are obviously a bit too big, but it beats wearing a school uniform to a Christmas event.

Penny finally spots Constance’s house after walking around aimlessly, and begins to speed walk towards it. Her attention is caught, however, by some orange hair that stands out in the blues and whites of the winter. Ocean seems to notice Penny too, and gives her a small wave, putting on her usual fake smile.

Penny just stares at her. Ocean is wearing her clothes. Penny doesn’t know why, but the thought makes her feel a bit warmer than usual. She keeps staring at Ocean, who stares back with a confused look.

Penny’s pulled out of her thoughts by a street pole colliding with her face - or more accurately, her walking directly into a street pole. Penny groans and rubs her head, then glances over at Ocean, who seems pretty amused. Penny feels herself warm up again.

Ocean makes her way over to Penny, who refuses to say anything about the events that transpired until they reach Constance’s door. The two are let in, and they’re greeted to the chaotic sight of Mischa chugging alcohol, Noel cheering him on and Ricky playing with Cappuccino - Constance’s cat.

“Constance! Really? You gave Mischa alcohol?” Ocean scolds. Constance’s warm smile weakens, and she nods.

“Sorry.”

Ocean sighs and shakes her head, then takes the alcohol from Mischa, causing a bit of a commotion. 

Penny settles down next to Ricky and pats Cappuccino.

“You like cats too?” Ricky signs, smiling. Penny gives him a confused look, and Ricky sighs in frustration. Why does no one in this goddamn town know sign language? He awkwardly points to Penny and then the cat, and Penny manages to more or less get the gist of what he’s asking.

“Oh! Yeah, they’re so adorable! What about you?” Penny answers with a grin.

Ricky nods and smiles, then reaches into his backpack and pulls out a sketchbook that he hands to Penny. Penny opens it, and is met with doodles of cats - well, cat-people - in a hand-drawn comic format.

“You drew this?”

Ricky nods and smiles.

“It’s so good!”

“Thank you,” Ricky signs. Penny smiles at him and giggles. Ricky’s face gains a faint pink sheen.

Ocean tosses the liquor out the window with a sigh, ignoring the frustrated and drunken insults coming from Noel and Mischa.

“Stop complaining, we’re sixteen! Consuming alcohol without parental supervision is irresponsible!” Ocean scolds, shaking her head and frowning. Noel rolls his eyes, and Mischa flips her off.

“It’s Christmas, Ocean. Maybe we should… y’know, just let them have fun?” Constance suggests quietly. 

Ocean’s glare puts an end to that idea. “It’s possible to have fun without falling into alcoholism!” she snaps. Constance simply nods and retreats to the kitchen. Mischa and Noel seem to have already moved on from the booze, and they’re busy joking around. Penny is sitting next to Ricky and chatting with him. Ricky seems to be attempting to teach her sign language, and they look like they’re enjoying themselves.

Ocean sighs and steps outside, sitting on the steps of the porch and shutting her eyes, feeling the snowflakes land on her as she slowly calms. After letting the snow swirl around her for a few minutes, the front door opens, and someone steps outside and sits beside her. Ocean’s eyes remain shut, still revelling in the cold in spite of her shivering. Shuffling is heard next to her, followed by a warm sweater being pulled over her head.

“You should start wearing warm things. This is the second time I’ve had to give you my sweater,” the person beside Ocean - Penny - says. Ocean opens her eyes and hums in acknowledgement, a soft smile forming on her face as she glances over at Penny, who smiles. “Your hair’s pretty,” she remarks.

Ocean tilts her head at her. She’s never really cared about her hair that much outside of wanting it to be perfectly neat, let alone considered it pretty .

“Thanks,” she murmurs. Penny grins at her, and Ocean can’t help but give her a soft smile back. Penny scooches closer to Ocean, covered in goosebumps. From the fact that she no longer has her sweater, Ocean guesses. Penny leans against Ocean and curls in on herself. Ocean tenses up as usual at first, but slowly relaxes and shuts her eyes again. The two remain there for a while in a peaceful silence.

After what feels like both forever and yet no time at all, Penny stands up and stretches. Ocean is admittedly disappointed at the loss of the warmth on her side, but says nothing.

“You wanna come inside?” Penny asks, offering a hand to Ocean. “Looks like they’re watching a movie now.” 

Ocean shakes her head. “No. But thanks.” Penny smiles and nods.

“‘Kay. Merry Christmas,” she says as she retreats back inside. Ocean stares back at the now dark sky and shuts her eyes again. Penny, despite everything, is still somehow in the “Things Ocean Doesn’t Understand” list. Though she doesn’t dislike her for it anymore.

Eventually, Ocean stands up and embarks on the five-minute trek from Constance’s house to her own. The serenity is almost instantly broken when she notices the lights in her house are on. She knows for a fact that the lights were off when she left. Which only leaves one explanation.

Ocean manages to slip inside unnoticed - mainly because the 20 people or so that are present are all drunk and high off of weed and shrooms and whatever the hell else her parents have managed to get their hands on. She makes her way upstairs and lies down on her bed. As she attempts to drift off, she realises she’s still wearing Penny’s sweater. Hell, her outfit consists entirely of Penny’s clothes. She slips the sweater off, but decides against tossing it on the floor. The sweater smells like Penny. Which is better than the smell of weed, beer and smoke any day, so she pulls it over her nose and mouthand finally allows herself to fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Chapter Text

“Okay, so you just times this number by the denominator, and…” Ocean scrawls a few arrows and math symbols on the sheet, then writes the sum. “There! 237!”

“...Yeah, I got, like, none of that,” Penny murmurs awkwardly. Ocean sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose, then forces a smile.

“Okay then, let- let’s go back to percentages. That should be easier, right?” She asks.

Penny nods and gives Ocean a sheepish smile. Okay, she might have lied a little bit. She partially understood it… but getting Ocean to start over means getting more time with Ocean, which means Penny is in a good mood for longer! Why Ocean has that effect on her Penny has no idea. Maybe it’s some kind of entertainment thing, like Ocean is such a stereotypical straight-A student - to the point that she belongs in a movie more than real life - that it entertains her. So far that’s been Penny’s theory.

“When I was in sixth grade, something that helped me with percentages is the fact that they can be reversed. Does that make sense?”

Penny shakes her head. “Nope.”

Ocean visibly deflates, but forces her smile to return. “Okay, well… 4% of 50 is the same as 50% of 4. Understand?”

Penny nods and takes notes - a habit Ocean forced her to get into when she realised Penny just zoned out for half of their sessions. “Sixth grade? Wow. You’re pretty smart,” she murmurs, knowing it would make Ocean begin on one of her rants.

“Oh, I know… that’s why the teachers love me!” Ocean says with a proud grin. She does her usual thing - Penny thinks it’s adorable - of putting her hands behind her back and swivelling around. Penny suppresses a grin. “You know, Penny, I have a saying? I’m just a small town girl with a spring in her step and a song in her heart! And that song is a medley!”

Penny could listen to her talk all day.

“...And that is why not everyone should have a library card!” Ocean finishes enthusiastically, beaming. Penny can’t suppress a smile at Ocean’s excitement. It’s contagious. Though seemingly only to her, considering Ocean acting like this around anyone else just results in boredom and frustration. Penny doesn’t get how people could be so frustrated at it though. So she lets Ocean keep talking, ignoring the annoyed glances coming from the others in the library.

No matter how hard she tries, Penny can’t understand that feeling for the life of her. She’s still pretty sure it’s either her being entertained by Ocean’s personality, or her being jealous of Ocean. Both of which she has yet to disprove. Though neither of them explain why she finds Ocean’s real smile - rare as it is - so contagious and just pretty in general, or why she finds Ocean’s eyes so mesmerising despite them being the same shade of brown that a third of the world shares. Nor do they explain why Penny can’t help but admire her when Ocean sits in front of a window and the sun shines on her hair in such a way that it looks like it’s glowing golden. It could be chalked up to jealousy, yes, but jealousy doesn’t make you feel like you’re on cloud nine.

Ocean’s always looked best in the sunlight. The colours of her hair and her eyes, and just her in general, reminds Penny of the colours of autumn. The vibrant orange hair, those deep brown eyes, just everything about her, really.

“Penny? Penny? Hellooo?” Ocean’s voice pulls Penny out of her contemplation.

“Huh? Wha-? Yeah?”

“You zoned out again.”, Ocean answers, putting on a condescendingly sweet tone. “You know, it’s a good idea to stop that habit, it’s important to focus as much as you can during class-”

“Mm. Okay. Sorry,” Penny murmurs. Ocean even looks cute when she’s frustrated- wait, what ?

Ocean sighs and shakes her head. “Penny, really. You need to focus. Now, where was I when you tuned out?”

“Oh, um… something about percentages and library cards and stuff?”

“Penelope Lamb! That was twenty minutes ago! You’ve been zoned out for a whole twenty freaking minutes!?”

“Oh. Oops.”

“Oh, forget it. We can continue this in our after school session, okay? Choir starts in five minutes, so I should probably go now. Remember to revise pages 17-23!”

That’s another thing about Ocean that Penny finds adorable. Punctuality is too important to her. She leaves for classes five minutes early just so if anything happens, she still won’t be late. Penny pulls out a textbook and goes over everything one more time before she leaves for choir.

“I’m not gay, Noel!”

“Keep telling yourself that, Seawater.”

“Why do you keep-? I’m straight!”

Penny walks into the choir room to an… interesting argument between Noel and Ocean. Mishca, Ricky and Constance are watching the two like it’s some sort of sitcom. To be fair, it is a very sitcom-y situation.

“You are so gay.”

“AM. NOT!”

“Are too~!”

“Just because I champion your journey of sexual discovery does NOT mean I myself am gay!”

“Ooh, big words!”

“Screw you!”

“No thanks. I’m gay.”

“WHY ARE YOU SO FOTHER MUCKING-”

Constance and Ricky exchange glances and shake their heads in unison. Mischa grins. Ocean is still screaming at Noel while he laughs his ass off. Penny eventually decides to step in - though Ocean does look pretty cute when she’s straight up pissed off.

“Okay, Noel, I think that’s enough,” Penny pipes up, stepping between the two. “As fun as this is,  I don’t wanna have to deal with a grumpy Ocean when we study.”

“Killjoy,” Noel huffs, crossing his arms. Ocean just scowls at Penny and Noel. After a bit of coaxing, Ocean finally calms enough to start directing everyone.

“Okay, people! Get in place for Uranium Suite! Penny, far left! Constance, far right! No, Mischa! Swap places with Ricky! Okay, good!” Ocean squeezes into the middle of the front row.

“Five, Six- Noel stop laughing -Seven, Eight!”

Choir was a disaster. When isn’t it? But Penny tries her best to cheer Ocean up by leaving a smiley face in the frost of the window Ocean will be sitting next to. Penny’s foster mother picks them up, and Penny sends Ocean upstairs while she stays down to prepare a treat for Ocean.

Penny makes her way upstairs holding a mug of hot chocolate, treading carefully as to not spill it. When she pushes the door open, she sees Ocean sitting on her bed, flushed from the cold. Penny hands her the mug.

“Here. It’s hot chocolate.”

“That’s diabetes in a cup,” Ocean scoffs. “And incredibly unhealthy. Do you know how much artificial sugar is in-”

“Um, nevermind. I can tip it out…”

“No, no!” Ocean blurts out, snatching the drink from Penny. “I mean- no, it’s fine. I’ll drink it,” she corrects awkwardly, taking a sip, then taking another longer one. “It’s- it’s good. You made this?”

“Yep.”

Ocean hums and takes another sip. Penny smiles at her. Ocean smiles back. Penny’s always loved these moments, when Ocean stops being ‘The Most Successful Girl In Town’, and instead is just… Ocean. Penny could just kiss her…

…

What the hell? Who thinks that?

…

Metaphorically. Like, the expression. Obviously. No one would want to actually kiss her. That would be gross. And besides, she’s straight. Heh…

“Can I show you something?” Penny asks, growing painfully aware of the fact that her face is hot and probably flushed red. Ocean looks up from the already half empty mug and nods. Penny opens a window and climbs out onto a ledge, gesturing for Ocean to do the same. Ocean follows, albeit rather clumsily, and eventually the two pull themselves up onto the roof. The sunset shines onto Ocean, and Penny’s brain short circuits.

“You’re beautiful…” Penny breathes out, watching Ocean in awe. Ocean gives her a stunned look, and Penny flushes red and stammers. “I- I mean, the sun. The sun’s beautiful.”

Ocean’s face morphs into amusement. “Oh. Yeah, it is,” she says, sipping the hot chocolate again. Her expression is unreadable, but she seems to be deep in thought. Penny offers her a soft smile, and leans against Ocean, though she restrains herself from resting her head on her shoulder. The two watch the sun fall below the horizon in silence as Ocean finishes her hot chocolate. They’ll study later, and this day will probably be forgotten. Penny doesn’t want to think about that. But for now, it’s just Penny and Ocean, watching the sunset together like it’s all that matters.

And for the time being, it is.

Chapter Text

Ocean isn’t exactly known for being a ray of sunshine. Of course, she does her best to put on a cheery attitude and appear friendly, no matter how frustrated or stressed she may feel, but it’s hilariously easy to see through it. Her argument with Noel last week certainly didn’t help. She’s been replaying it in her mind over and over again, and each time she keeps feeling worse. Not because of the argument itself, but because of the possibility that Noel might actually be right. She’s never had a crush on a single boy, ever, and while she always decided that it’s because she prioritises academics over boys, her confidence in that statement is beginning to falter.

It’s not that Ocean has anything against queer people. It’s just that, well, if she’s one of them, her plans for her future are ruined. She has the rest of her life meticulously laid out! She’ll graduate high school, then get the hell out of Uranium City and study law at a prestigious university - maybe even one of the the ivy league ones in the US like Harvard, Duke or Brown. After that, she’ll get a job as a politician or a lawyer, and make her way up to be the president of Canada. Then she’ll marry a guy with a steady job and a decent personality - okay, maybe that bit isn’t too planned out - have kids, and then she’s done everything she needs.

If she’s gay, then everything is ruined. She can’t have kids. She can’t be a politician - or at least not a successful one. She’ll be looked down upon in law school.

Which is why 4 days ago she stood in front of one of the commonly sought-after basketball kids, spewing nonsense about having had ‘feelings for him for a while and stuff’, and that she wanted him to be her boyfriend. To her surprise, he actually accepted rather than laughing her out of the room. Well, “ accepted ” may not be the best way to describe it, considering his exact words were:

“Sure, whatever. Just quit bein’ so much of a nerd. I don’t want ya to embarrass me around my friends.”

Ocean frowned, but nodded. And since then, she’s officially had a boyfriend.

Unfortunately, he’s not a very good boyfriend. Ocean’s had to cancel choir twice because he wanted her to attend his soccer practice. Which is annoying, because soccer practice lasts exactly 17 minutes longer than choir, which means Ocean has to shift everything in her schedule a quarter of an hour, which butterfly effects into her getting a whopping 4 hours of sleep. But no one else would be willing to date “Little Miss Perfect”, so she has to stay with him. Besides, according to other girls, he’s hot. Ocean’s sure that if she stays with him for a while, she’ll start to like him. Even if her two closest friends are insisting he’s not healthy for her. What do they know? They don’t get what’s at stake here.

“Ocean?” Penny’s voice pulls Ocean out of her thoughts, startling her. “You okay? Normally I’m the one who zones out when we study,” she teases.

“Oh! Sorry,” Ocean murmurs, glancing back down at the textbook. Penny’s playful grin falls.

“Ocean, really… Are you okay?”

“Of course I am! Why wouldn’t I be?” Ocean asks, forcing a laugh. Penny’s frown darkens. 

“You’ve been acting all grumpy since you started dating that jerk. I just don’t think he’s-”

“You don’t think he’s good for me. I know, Penny. You and Constance have told me fourteen times in the last four days,” Ocean huffs.

“I know. I’m sorry. We’re just… we’re worried about you,” Penny explains, gently combing her fingers through Ocean’s hair. “You’d tell me if something was wrong, right?”

Ocean hums and shrugs, not really minding the touch. “I’ll try.” A lie. An obvious one, at that. But Penny trusts her enough to believe it, seemingly. Ocean allows her mind to wander again.

She’s heard the rumours about Penny. That she’s a lesbian. If they turn out to be true, Ocean’s going to have to find a way to break ties with her. Which is a shame, since Penny is good company, and also one of the sweetest people Ocean’s ever met - Constance is great, but she doesn't calm Ocean when she’s stressed. If anything, she stresses her out more. And Penny has a beautiful singing voice, shy as she is to show it off. But Ocean can’t afford to associate herself with any more queer people. One is more than enough. She shouldn’t get ahead of herself though. Because they’re just rumours after all, and they’re highly unlikely to be true.

Come to think of it, Penny didn’t used to act like this towards Ocean. She’s gotten more… touchy  recently. But only with Ocean. She’s also been staring quite often too. Strange. Yet another reason Penny is on the “Things Ocean Doesn’t Understand” list.

“Ocean? Hellooo?”

Ocean grumbles as she is once again interrupted from her thoughts by Penny. “What?” she snaps.

Penny seems taken aback, but speaks anyway. “Are you sure you’re okay? Because I know Bra-”

Ocean glares at her and stands up, beginning to grab her things and pack them into her bag. “I think we should cut today’s session short,” she hisses. She reaches out to grab the bag itself, but Penny grabs her wrist.

“Wait! I’m sorry! I’ll shut up, I promise, just… stay. Please?” Penny asks, giving Ocean a small smile. Ocean tilts her head. Why is Penny so desperate to keep her here? Oh well. Just a little while longer can’t hurt, right?

“...Fine,” she huffs, sitting back down on the bed next to Penny. “...I’m sorry for lashing out.” Penny doesn’t answer. Instead, she begins to pull Ocean down. Ocean hesitates, but ultimately allows Penny to do whatever she wants. Which turns out to be playing with Ocean’s hair again while her head rests on Penny’s lap.

“I think we should cut today’s session short,” Ocean hisses, suddenly standing up and shoving all her stuff in the bag. Penny internally panics. Did she say something wrong? Damn it. She shouldn’t have mentioned Brandon, should she?

“Wait!” Penny blurts out, grabbing Ocean’s wrist before she can put her bag on. “I’m sorry! I’ll shut up, I promise, just… stay,” Penny pleads, slowly releasing her grip on Ocean’s wrist and trying to smile. “Please?”

Ocean stares at her thoughtfully for a while, before huffing out a reluctant, “Fine.” Penny’s smile widens as she watches Ocean sit on the bed next to her, looking troubled. “Sorry about the outburst,” Ocean adds.

Penny decides not to answer. Mainly because she has no clue what to say. Instead, she guides Ocean’s head down onto her lap. Ocean resists slightly at first, but soon gives in. Penny plays with her hair again. She still doesn’t know why she feels like this around Ocean. But she’s decided questioning it makes things worse, so for now she’ll just bask in the strange joy that she gets when Ocean actually lets her do things like this. Her hair is so weirdly soft. Though, to be fair, Penny doesn’t have much of a comparison. Penny is about to lie down herself, when Ocean’s phone goes off. Penny already knows who it is, and Ocean probably does too.

Brandon.

Penny speaks before Ocean can say anything.

“Maybe you should, uh, ignore him for once,” she suggests awkwardly as Ocean reaches for her phone. “Like… tell him you’re busy..?”

Ocean stares at her phone, then looks up at Penny, before sighing. “I’m sorry, Penny. I have to go. He’s my boyfriend.” 

Penny couldn’t help but notice the slight grimace on Ocean’s face when she called Brandon her boyfriend. She opens her mouth to speak up, but decides against it and simply watches Ocean grab her bag and leave. The room feels smaller without Ocean. Oh well. It’s just a week before she gets to see her again, and hopefully their next study session goes uninterrupted. It’s a pretty good deal. She gets to spend time with the girl who for some reason is invading her thoughts, and all she has to do in return is be her loyal supporter - something she’d happily do even without their arrangement.

Penny sighs and lies on her back, once again allowing her imagination to surround her. Ocean seems to be increasingly present in her daydreams. Strange.

Ocean groans as she finds the soccer field in the middle of a small park, where Brandon and his friends are playing. Brandon glares at her.

“The hell took you so long?”

“I’m sorry. I was with Penny.”

“Who?”

“Penny. The new girl?”

“Whatever. Just sit on the side and cheer me on,” Brandon scoffs, pointing over to a bench. Ocean lets out a heavy sigh and sits on the bench, placing her bag next to her. For the next two hours she watches the ball get kicked around, slightly wishing she had listened to Penny and stayed with her. As strange and frustratingly mysterious Penny can be, she truly does care about Ocean.

You know what? Screw it.

Who cares if the rumours are true? Lesbian or not, Penny is still Ocean’s friend.

Chapter Text

Mischa wanders the halls with a frown on his face. Talia hasn’t been seeing his messages. Hopefully she’s okay. Maybe she just hasn’t checked her Facebook messages in a while. Still, he tries once more just to be sure.

💐 🌸 Квітка_Талія 🇺🇦♥️

______________

Today, 2:42am

BadEgg69: Talia

BadEgg69: як справи

BadEgg69: How are you?

BadEgg69: You are in school?

Today, 7:09am

BadEgg69: Talia мій милий

BadEgg69: Will you answer?

BadEgg69: I message пізніше

______________

Still nothing. Mischa sighs and slips his phone back into his pocket. Right as he does, he spots three girls giggling and standing at Penny’s locker. One of them slips something halfway into the door before spotting Mischa, and the girls run off laughing hysterically. Mischa glances at the note for a moment, then decides whatever the hell happened is none of his business, and walks off.

“...Why are you going to the football game again?” Penny asks, tilting her head at Ocean as the two walk down the hall.

Ocean scoffs and glances at Penny. “Because having a relationship means having a responsibility. I have to go. Whether or not I enjoy sports is irrelevant.”

“Aren’t relationships meant to make you, you know… happy?” Penny stares at Ocean expectantly, but no response comes. After realising Ocean’s probably not going to answer, Penny sighs and pulls the choir schedule from her bag. “Okay, fine. So… vocal warm-ups, practise Uranium, and then Fall Fair?”

“Yes! It’s a straightforward schedule, you should have no problem directing the choir for a day.”

“What about your solo?”

“Well, considering you’re my temporary replacement, I suppose you can be my understudy too.”

Penny groans and folds up the paper, shoving it into her pocket. Not even two seconds later, Ocean suddenly darts off and snatches something sticking out of Penny’s locker. Penny rushes up to her, but Ocean doesn’t let Penny look at… what seems to be a note.

“Ocean!”

“Penelope, passing notes in school can lead to bullying. I am simply reading this to make sure that this is appropriate.”

Penny groans. “Can you at least tell me what it says?”

“Fine,” Ocean sighs, unfolding the paper. “ Dear New Girl, I think your - Really? Has grammar been forgotten nowadays?  - I think your super pretty and smart. Meet me outside the Blackwood Café after school, more details below. Love, your secret admirer. ”

“...What.”

“That’s what they wrote,” Ocean says with a shrug.

Penny just glances between the card and Ocean incredulously. “Let me see!”

“No! High school relationships are highly inappropriate, and having one will distract you from your studies. I won’t allow it,” Ocean answers matter-of-factly. Penny scoffs at her.

“What? Ocean, you have a high school relationship!” she counters.

“Well, that’s not the same. I trust myself to still be able to focus on my academics,” Ocean retorts.

“And you don’t trust me?”

“No.”

Penny glares at her. “ Wow .” Ocean gives her a smug look, and Penny scoffs and leaves without another word, internally hoping the ceiling would collapse on Ocean somehow. Sadly, the world is not a wish-granting factory, and Ocean remains uninjured. Penny is considering throwing Ocean through a window - or better, locking her in a room with Noel - when the bell rings. By the time Penny turns around again, Ocean is already gone, likely panicking about the fact that she isn’t early to class.

Penny grumbles as she makes her way down the hallway, checking her schedule. Great. Physical Education. On the bright side, she doesn’t have to worry about Ocean nagging her about the note, since she always manages to find an excuse not to do PE.

Ocean emerges from the halls rooms and, as usual, approaches their new PE coach.

“Hello, Miss Lawrence. As you know, I’m a hard-working, well achieving student here, and I’d love to do anything I can to help!” Ocean says, grinning proudly. “And I’m aware that Saint Cassian can be a stressful environment for new teachers,” she continues, “so I’d love to help you for today’s lesson!”

“Oh? Miss Rosenberg, I presume,” the coach sighs, crossing her arms. “Your previous coach warned me about you.”

“...Warned? I believe you mean informed , Miss. I understand you’re not a native english speaker considering your accent, so perhaps I can-”

“I was born here, I can speak English perfectly well. Go change into your gym clothes and join the others for dodgeball.”

“But-”

“ Go .”

Ocean scoffs and walks off with her arms crossed, muttering euphemisms under her breath as the rest of the class watch her.

“Uh oh. You have to actually do Phys ed today,” Penny remarks as Ocean sits down beside her.

“It’s not my fault the teacher simply doesn’t understand-”

“Just admit you got told off by the teacher, Satan,” Noel butts in, clearly trying not to laugh. Ocean scoffs, averting her gaze from him, and Penny snickers.

It’s common knowledge that Ocean was never good at physical education. And while she probably wouldn’t be caught dead saying it, she definitely assists the teachers just to get out of it. And to be fair, it usually works.

She’s well aware that Penny isn’t a fan of sports either - ‘too much socialising,’ she had said - but she seems to do pretty well at it. Ocean, however, is not. A solid 30 seconds into the game, a ball slams straight into her face.

The coach blows a whistle. “Rosenberg, out!”

“Fine,” Ocean hisses through clenched teeth, getting up and walking back to the bleachers. She casts a glance at the person who threw the ball - Brandon - who is currently laughing so hard his face is red.

A few minutes later, Penny is hit, and Ocean is joined on the bleachers.

“Hello, Penny,” Ocean sighs, already expecting the lecture on how unhealthy Brandon is for her.

“Hi,” Penny greets, smiling at her. Ocean just scowls at a line of ants.

“You know, you’re–”

“Penny, if I hear a word about Brandon, I will have to kick you out of the choir. I understand that you and Constance disapprove of him, but I’m capable of looking after myself,” Ocean says firmly, shifting her gaze to meet Penny’s.

“Ocean,” Penny says, casting her an exasperated look.

“You can’t–”

“That’s not what I was going to say.”

“...It wasn’t?”

Penny shakes her head. “No. No it wasn’t.”

“What were you planning to say?”

“I was gonna ask if you were okay,” Penny sighs. Ocean relaxes slightly as Penny places a hand on her shoulder. “You got hit pretty hard. You’re not hurt, are you?”

Oh . Ocean shakes her head, not breaking eye contact with Penny.

“Good,” Penny says, flashing Ocean a smile. Ocean watches her get up and join Noel, and huffs. She and Penny have been growing more distant these past few days.

“Hey!”

Ocean jolts at the sound of Brandon, who is currently glaring at her. “Huh?”

“You’re meant to be cheering me on, dumbass! I’m your boyfriend , remember?” Brandon snaps, grabbing a very startled Ocean by the wrist and dragging her off the bleachers. “God, you should loosen up a little. You suck.”

Ocean has found that arguing back just ends up in being screamed at or slapped - and she already gets enough of that from her parents. So she just shuts up and nods. “Right. Yeah.”

“Good girl,” Brandon sneers, making Ocean grimace and try not to gag. She can practically see Penny shaking her head and sighing. “You know,” he continues, a smirk coming onto his face, “I bet I could get you to quit bein’ such a hardass all the time. I’m throwin’ a party at my house in a month. You should come.

“Oh, I’m sorry, but I can’t. I don’t really like–”

“Quit whining and just come.”

“Penny is not my–”

“Great! See ya there! Now come on, cheer me on!”

Ocean sighs, but forces her usual smile and claps every time Brandon hits someone.

Penny looks past Noel, eyeing Ocean, who is busy cheering on her stupid boyfriend. Penny despises him. She’s not sure why. It’s not like it’s jealousy , she just wishes she could throw him into a tank full of dolphins and watch him flail around and scream in agony. Ocean’s happier with her anyways.

But that’s not why she’s staring. She’s checking to make sure Ocean is distracted. Once she’s sure, she excuses herself and scurries into the girls’ locker rooms, scanning the room for Ocean’s bag… ah ! Of course, Ocean’s bag is hanging on a hook on the wall to ‘avoid getting germs all over it’. Penny grins and unzips it, rummaging through the contents of the bag and trying not to ruin the neatly folded uniform and perfectly organised books and papers. Finally, folded up and at the very bottom of the bag, lies the note. Penny takes it and quickly reads it to make sure it’s the one she’s looking for, before zipping the bag back up and returning to her spot on the bleachers and reading the details scrawled at the bottom of the note.

“ Small garden outside the Blackwood Café, 4:10pm, don’t be late!”

Penny commits the time and place to memory, before being jolted out of her thoughts by Noel.

“Hey, what do you have there?”

“A note,” Penny answers curtly, folding it up.

Noel grins, quickly snatching it before Penny can tuck it away. “Ooh, what does it say?”

“Noel!” Penny protests, but it’s too late. Noel reads the note, his smile fading as he reaches the end.

“You’re not actually going , are you?” he asks, handing the note back and frowning.

“Of course I am,” Penny answers, crossing her arms.

“Look, if this is what I think it is, you’re better off throwing that thing away.”

“Why?”

“I’m just looking out for you! Trust me, don’t go.”

“Fine, fine. I won’t.”

“ Thank you .”

Penny huffs and averts her gaze, repeating the details in her head. Oh, she’s definitely going.

Penny looks over her outfit once more in the mirror. She didn’t put on anything special, but she did decide to choose clothes that actually go together for once. After making sure she looks presentable, she dashes out the door and takes the 10 minute walk to Blackwood Café. It’s the only café on the street, so it sticks out a bit. The building itself also looks quite old, but it’s clearly been cared for.

Penny takes a seat on one of the benches outside of it and glances around for whoever wrote the note. Ten minutes pass. No one arrives. Penny is about to decide she’s been stood up, when a girl that she’s seen in school but never spoken to approaches, seemingly biting back a smile.

“You’re Penny, right?”

“...Yeah,” Penny says quietly, internally cursing herself out. Social interaction seems so easy right up until she actually has to do it.

“You got my note?” The girl asks coyly, grinning. 

Penny feels uneasy. Something is off. Still, she stands up and approaches the girl. “Yeah…”

“I’m a girl.”

“...Ok.”

“So, you’d still date me?”

“...I guess, yeah.”

“Told you!” The girl suddenly shouts, facing three other girls who had been watching from afar. “The new girl’s gay!”

Penny grimaces. She should’ve left when she got that feeling. “I–”

Penny’s words are cut off when she feels two hands slam into her and push her over. She really should’ve left.

“I didn’t- that’s not-”

“Hey! Leave her the hell alone!” Someone snaps, causing the girls to whip around.

Noel .

“Oh, look! The other one’s here too!” One snorts.

Noel, in response, scowls and shakes his head, stepping toward one of the girls. She scurries away giggling, and the other three do too.

“Noel?” Penny asks, frowning and looking up at him.

“Don’t mind them,” he sighs, helping Penny stand up. “They’re cowards. It’s a shame, really. They can’t even be good tormentors, so they’re just nuisances.”

“...Okay,” Penny says, slightly puzzled.

“Yeah.”

“How’d you know I’d be here?”

“‘Cause they did the same thing to me about two years ago,” Noel answers with a shrug.

“That’s why you told me not to…”

“Yeah.”

Penny sighs and averts her gaze to the ground. “Sorry.”

Noel’s frown softens, and he smiles. “Come on, let’s get some coffee.”

Penny grins, and follows him inside.

Ocean sighs and toys with the hem of her skirt, watching the game. She never really understood sports. You just throw a ball into a net or kick it into a net or whack it with a bat. There’s nothing interesting about it. Or maybe she just doesn’t get the appeal. She’d much rather be helping Penny study, or sitting in the Blackwood Café with Constance. But she has a boyfriend, and she needs to maintain the relationship to maintain everyone’s opinion on her. Which means enduring insults, and huge plan changes, and of course, going to boring football games.

“Hey! Storm!”

“Actually, it’s Ocean,” Ocean corrects, sighing and hopping off of the bleachers to approach Brandon.

“Whatever. My girlf- I mean, one of my friends told me your weird friend’s a lesbian,” he huffs. Ocean narrows her eyes at the insults aimed towards her friends, but she remains silent. “Oh, isn’t that guy friend of yours also gay? You’ve got two gay friends!” Brandon sneers.

“Well, yes, I guess I do,” Ocean sighs.

“So, doesn’t that mean you’re gay too?”

“No, not necessarily.”

“Then why are you friends with them?”

“I’m not-” Ocean stutters, averting her gaze as she searches for any words.

“You should leave them alone. If people think you’re one of them, I’ll never live it down,” Brandon scoffs.

“I can’t do that. They’re my friends, I–” Ocean is cut off by a hand slamming into the side of her face. She backs away and falls silent.

“God, you’re pathetic. Do you really think people will start caring about you if you’re all inclusive and shit? Well, they won’t. News flash: Everyone fucking hates you. So leave them the hell alone, or I’m assuming you’re one of ‘em.”

Ocean nods, staring at the ground. “I-I… Okay. I’m sorry.”

Chapter Text

Penny looks over her music sheet, committing everything to memory as well as she can. Ocean is almost always in a bad mood after doing something with Brandon. Which is why she plans to impress her by being the best choir student possible. She quietly hums the notes, watching Mischa type on his phone with a worried look on his face. Noel is biting his lip and watching him, and Ricky is doodling, occasionally glancing up at her. Then the door bursts open.

“Everyone get into your places!” Ocean calls, sending everyone scurrying into position. Penny smiles at Ocean, but she simply averts her gaze and hands Penny some neatly folded clothes. “I forgot to give these back to you.”

Penny offers her a smile. “Hey, it’s fine. You can keep them,” she chuckles.

“No. They’re too big for me,” Ocean says coldly, drawing the attention of everyone. Penny frowns in confusion.

“I’m sure you’ll grow into them.”

“Just take them.”

Penny frowns, but reaches out to take the clothes. The ones she lended to Ocean on her birthday, as well as her sweater. “Are you okay?”

Ocean doesn’t answer. She just goes straight into the choir lesson. Well, that was odd.

During the lesson, Noel leans over to Penny.

“Is it just me, or is Satan acting even more like the Ice Queen today?” he scoffs.

“I dunno. Maybe she’s just… a little upset?”

Noel laughs a little, before being told off by Ocean. He just rolls his eyes and makes a face at her, then turns back to Penny. “Yeah, no. She’s just a bitch when she’s upset, not an asshole.”

Penny sighs. “Ocean’s not an… a-hole …” she counters.

“She is. She definitely is.”

Penny opens her mouth to argue back, but decides to fall silent. Ocean already seems like she’s in a bad mood. She doesn’t want to make things worse by talking during choir.

Maybe during first break she can talk to Ocean.

“Ocean? Ocean!” Penny calls, rushing through the halls to catch up to Ocean. “Hey, why are you ignoring me?”

Ocean shakes her head, refusing to even make eye contact with Penny. “Just eat your lunch.”

“Did I do something wrong?” Penny asks quietly, stepping in front of Ocean to stop her from walking away. Ocean just stares at her blankly, not answering. “Come on,” Penny pleads. “Just tell me what I did wrong. Is it because I kept mentioning your boyfriend? Because I promise, I–”

“Just stop,” Ocean hisses, pushing Penny out of the way and scowling at the ground. Penny considers following, but ultimately decides to go eat lunch.

She spends the day mulling over why Ocean is acting so… odd. Maybe she just got sick of her. The thought sends an inexplicable wave of dread through Penny. Ocean can’t have grown tired of her, could she? No. Maybe something’s just going on at home.

No matter the reason, Penny has to try to cheer her up. She finds some flowers in the school’s garden and weaves them into a flower crown - something she had learned to do to pass the time back when she still lived with her parents. Once she’s satisfied with them, she sets off to find Ocean. She finds a very disgruntled Noel instead.

“Have you seen Ocean lately? She’s been such an ass!” He grumbles, picking at a loose thread on his sweater. “Well, more than usual.”

Penny hums in agreement. “Yeah. I think she’s upset or something.”

Noel scoffs. “You think? She glared at me when I walked past. I wasn’t even insulting her or anything! Why the hell–”

“Do you know which direction she went?”

“What? Oh, she was going to the library to study. She always does.”

Penny nods and rushes off, leaving Noel by himself. 

Sure enough, Ocean is in the library. Penny suddenly feels herself freeze in place. She’s scared to approach Ocean. That’s weird. She’s scared to approach anyone, really, but this is a different kind of scared. Still, she steels herself and walks up to Ocean with the brightest smile she can muster.

“Hey, Ocean.”

“Oh, Penny. Hello,” Ocean greets, not looking up from her book. That’s definitely weird.

“Um. I made this for you,” Penny awkwardly squeaks out. She hands Ocean the flower crown, and Ocean takes it, inspecting it. For a split second, Ocean’s face softens. And then it goes away, and she tosses the flower crown elsewhere.

“...It’s unsanitary. Lots of germs live on flowers. Don’t bring it inside.”

Penny frowns, her heart sinking a little. She spent a lot of time on that flower crown. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“It’s just… you’re acting really weird.”

“How I behave is none of your concern, Penny,” Ocean says coldly.

Penny bites the inside of her cheek. Ocean really is acting weird. “...Will I see you tomorrow? For the study session?”

Ocean looks up at Penny, seemingly lost in thought. Eventually, she answers with an exasperated, “I don’t know.”

That’s definitely weird. Ocean will go to a study session if she’s free, no exceptions. Hell, she even makes make-up study sessions for the ones she missed because of Brandon. But she doesn’t talk back to Ocean. Not when she’s like this. Nodding, Penny leaves, finding her usual spot in the branches of a tree. Did she do something wrong? No, it can’t be that. She’s acting weird to everyone, not just her. If something were going on at home, things wouldn’t end up like that. Something is definitely off.

After school, Penny flops straight onto her bed and stares at the ceiling. She can’t get that interaction with Ocean out of her mind. She keeps replaying it, going over every detail, looking for some sort of reason for Ocean’s behaviour. The most likely explanation is that Brandon had something to do with it. But what could he say that would make Ocean just… cut everyone off? Something has to be wrong. And Whatever it is, Penny’s going to find out.

Maybe Brandon’s manipulating her somehow. Or hurting her. The thought makes Penny feel… weird. She doesn’t want Ocean to get hurt. No. Ocean’s stubborn, and a bit of an idiot sometimes, but she’s not stupid. She wouldn’t stay with someone that’s hurting her. Would she?

Penny’s gaze falls down to her school bag, and she searches it for the clothes Ocean returned to her. They smell like… weed? Does Ocean smoke? No. Ocean smoking is like a fish climbing a tree. Maybe her parents smoke. That would explain some things. They’re already physically abusive. Substance abuse seems like something they’d do. Still, Ocean doesn’t usually smell like weed. Maybe she just wears a ton of perfume.

Penny doesn’t want to just abandon Ocean. Even if she pushes her away. Hell, even if she hurts her. Penny’s still going to try. Because being around Ocean makes her happy for whatever reason, and she wouldn’t give that feeling up for the world.

Penny is brought out of her thoughts by her phone buzzing. She checks it. Noel has invited her to watch a movie with him. She doesn’t really have anything better to do, so she accepts.

Uranium city is a really, really small town. The public school was shut down in ‘99 as well as the city hall. Now there’s just a boring shopping mall that for some reason everyone in town has an indescribable hate for. It’s nothing too interesting. Some fast food places, a singular run down arcade, some other shops, and an overpriced movie theatre. Penny’s never really been to the mall until now. She’s currently lost, but she feels weird asking for directions because no one knows who she is. Although come to think of it, the movie theatre is probably that big door with a flashing image of a film reel on it. 

Weaving her way through the crowd, Penny manages to make it inside. She scans the movies playing for the one she and Noel had agreed on. They’re all either movies from Uranium’s golden era or movies about radiation poisoning. She’s not sure whose idea it was to play the original 1964 Oppenheimer - well, ‘In the Matter of J. Robert Oppenheimer’ - in a town named after a radioactive substance, but it seems to be the most popular one so far. Noel is waiting for her outside of the cheapest option - some cheesy zombie movie from the 80s.

“Hi,” Penny greets awkwardly.

Noel nods. “Hi. I’d have watched The Blue Angel or something, but our flat is a literal mess, you do not want to go in there.”

“It’s okay,” Penny chuckles. “It’s not like I have anything better to do than to watch… whatever this is. What’s it about? Minus the zombies, I mean.”

Noel shrugs. “Someone sets off a zombie plague by painting their pool tiles with the wrong kinda paint or something.”

“...How do you even manage that?”

“It was homemade paint. I’m pretty sure it had, like, a zombie virus in it or something, and when they went swimming everyone got zombified.”

“Oh.” 

The two stand there in silence for a bit, before they both start laughing.

“C’mon,” Noel chuckles, a hint of a smile on his face. “It’s an awful movie, but it’s still fun to watch.”

Penny follows him inside, still grinning.

“I can’t believe they saved the cat ,” Noel mutters, sipping what’s left from his milkshake.

Penny joins in, grinning. “I mean, I’d do it too.”

“You’d sacrifice the cure for the zombie plague for a cat?”

“Sure,” Penny answers proudly.

Noel shakes his head, an amused huff escaping him. “Suit yourself.”

The two continue to excitedly chatter as they roam around the mall. Penny goes to order something from the taco bell, and for some reason Noel yelps and runs off. Strange. Maybe he doesn’t like Taco Bell? Penny goes over to join the queue, but her gaze lands on something else. Ocean. Ocean definitely isn’t one to visit the mall. But considering Brandon is next to her, it’s safe to assume this wasn’t entirely her idea.

And seeing the two together reminds Penny of Ocean’s odd behaviour. She’s going to get to the bottom of this. So she approaches.

“Hi, Ocean!” Penny chirrups. Ocean doesn’t meet Penny’s gaze. “What are you doing here?”

Penny catches Ocean sneaking a glance at Brandon. Brandon nods, and Ocean looks back to her. “Shopping. Why are you here?”

“I just saw a movie with Noel.”

“Then join him. I’m busy right now.”

Penny’s smile drops. She doesn’t really know what to do. “Oh. Um… are you okay? You’re acting really weird.”

“I’ve already answered that question. I’m fine,” Ocean insists. But Penny doesn’t take that for an answer. 

“No you’re not.” Penny and Ocean sort of just… stare at each other after that. Thinking of a way to test Ocean, she grabs her, and pulls her into a hug. Just to see how she reacts. To get an answer for her question. Not the smartest idea, but it’s not like Ocean usually minds.

Clearly this time is an exception. For a moment, Ocean relaxes and almost seems like she’ll hug her back, but instead Penny is shoved away and Ocean finally looks at her, albeit with a glare. “Look, Penny, I’m busy. I don’t want to talk to you right now. Go back to Noel.”

“Yeah!” Brandon butts in. “Go hang out with the other guy! Just stay the hell away from us!”

Penny doesn’t answer. She just stands there. She was right, this is Brandon’s doing. But she’s not exactly happy about it. After being stared down for a little longer, Penny gives up and leaves to find Noel.

Ocean doesn’t show up to lead the choir the next day. Instead, Constance is given the role of lead singer. The choir lesson is boring, and everyone is miserable. So, basically, nothing has changed. Well, except for Mischa’s slightly more obsessive texting.

Penny can’t bring herself to bother with actually singing. She just doodles on the back of her music sheet, unable to take her mind off of what Ocean said to her. It’s only been a few weeks since that night on the roof of her house. They went from being impossibly close to Ocean claiming she wants nothing to do with her. It hurts more than it should. Penny looks up from her sheet, only to see everyone swarming around a very shocked Mischa.

“What’s going on?” She asks quietly, standing up to join them.

Noel is the one that answers. “Talia says she’s coming to Uranium in a few months.”

“What?”

“Mhm.”

Well, this’ll be interesting.

Chapter Text

Penny wanders through the halls, counting the lockers. She doesn’t remember what Ocean’s locker number is, but she knows it’s 12 lockers to the left of her own. She could do the math and make things easier for herself, but where’s the fun in that? Penny stops at Ocean’s locker - come to think of it, she probably didn’t need to know the number considering the locker is so undeniably Ocean . Penny tears a bit of paper from her sketchbook and starts writing on it, oblivious to Ocean approaching her.

“I already told you what I think about notes in lockers.”

Penny whips around, stuffing the note in her pocket. “Ocean! Um, hi. I wanted to talk,” she says, forcing a smile. Ocean glares at her in response, and Penny steps out of the way as she goes to open her locker. “Look, um… I don’t know what we did wrong, but whatever it is… I’m sorry,” she says quietly.

“Penny,” Ocean sighs. “I already told you–”

“I know, It’s just… you suddenly cut us off. And I don’t get why.”

Penny frowns, and Ocean hesitates, staring into her locker for a while before turning back to Penny. “It’s nothing. I’ve just been busy.”

“No you haven’t,” Penny counters. Ocean sighs again, and averts her gaze. 

“I was having a bad day. You didn’t do anything wrong, Penny.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Is the study session on tonight?”

“Alright.”

Penny nods. And with that, the conversation ends, and Ocean walks away.

Ocean flips through her textbook, unable to focus for once in her life. She’s cutting off her friends now? Why? To impress Brandon? That’s stupid. And yet, at the same time, she understands her future is worth losing some dead weight.

But she still feels bad about it. So she does the only thing she can think of. She studies.

Ocean has never regretted being a good student before until now. It may have something to do with the fact that she has easily burned through every single short term assignment she needs to do. She frowns at the messy pile of papers on her desk and runs her fingers through her hair, racking her brain for something to do. Nothing comes. She can’t stop thinking about Penny and Noel. Penny has always been so sweet to her. And Noel… it feels like it’s been forever since they were friends, and yet there’s still a lingering connection despite their… less than friendly relationship nowadays.

No. No! Ocean shakes her head, groaning. She doesn’t need them. Her future depends on it. She needs this. Her future is one of the few things in her life that she has control over, and she’s not screwing it over because she’s sentimental about two random people. She needs a distraction before this drives her insane.

Standing up, Ocean searches her drawers, eventually finding some sticky notes. She takes them out and puts them on her desk with the intention of creating a to-do list, and ends up staring at them for a solid ten minutes, unsure what to write on them. Eventually giving up, Ocean buries her face in her hands and groans.

Before she has a chance to lose what little mental stability remains, her phone rings. Ocean practically dives for it, desperate for something to distract her from her current situation. Unfortunately for her, it’s not a distraction. If anything, it’s the very opposite.

“Penelope! Hello. Why- why exactly are you calling me?” Ocean asks, sitting down on her bed and flipping through her schedule. Crap. Did I miss something important?

“You’re ten minutes late. I, uh, I just called to ask if you were okay. You- er, you don’t have to come if you changed your mind or something. That’s fine. I just wanna know if you’re okay. Did I already say that? Sorry, I’m rambling.”

That just makes Ocean panic even more. Why does Penny sound so nervous? Oh, wait. Oh. The study session.

“Oh! Right, sorry about that! I got carried away with…” Ocean glances at her messy desk. “... stuff . I’ll be there in… four minutes?”

“Okay. Thanks. Bye.”

Ocean sighs and puts her phone down, pinching the bridge of her nose. Why did she agree to this? She should’ve backed out when she had the chance.

Ah well. It's too late now.

Penny paces back and forth on the front porch, waiting for Ocean. She’s a little worried, considering punctuality is concerningly important to Ocean. So far, her running theory is that Brandon did something to Ocean, so she had to stay home for a little bit longer. Or maybe she really did get carried away with whatever ‘stuff’ is. Penny sighs, watching her breath become a cloud in the air. She exhales again, trying to make a bigger cloud. It doesn’t really work, but still. Penny hops onto the railing and fiddles with a loose thread on her shirt, watching the snowflakes land on the ground. And then, amongst the whites and greys, a familiar pop of orange shows up in the distance. Not wanting to wait any longer, Penny hops out into the snow and rushes up to Ocean with a grin on her face. 

“Hiya, Oce! Hey, you actually brought something warm to wear! Good job,” she comments, patting Ocean’s scarf. Ocean simply casts her an irritated glance and continues walking. Not in a good mood, then. Okay.

Penny walks beside Ocean, bringing her up to the front door and opening it. Ocean still doesn’t say a word. The two walk upstairs. Still, silence. Penny sits down on her bed. Ocean sits around half a metre away.

“So… are we still studying?” Penny asks quietly, shuffling closer to Ocean, who doesn’t seem to make an effort to move away. At least there’s that.

“Yes. Sorry.” Ocean pulls out her textbook, and falls into her usual pattern of teaching Penny, starting to rant, then realising she’s ranting and continuing to teach. Penny doesn’t mind. It’s nice to see Ocean acting normal for once, considering everything that’s happened recently. Penny could just stare at Ocean all night. But she forces herself to focus.

“...I don’t get it.”

Ocean sighs, going over the math equation for the seventh time. “Okay. So, if this is moving at 130 kilometres an hour, then you need to use what I taught you to figure out how many metres a second it’s going. Got it?”

“...How do you convert between kilometres and metres again?”

“1000. You times by 1000.”

“Okay. Um… I still don’t get it.”

Ocean shuts the workbook and buries her hands in her face, groaning. “...It’s getting late. I should go home…” she mutters. Penny panics. She doesn’t want Ocean to go.

“No, it’s, um… it’s cold out there! You should stay overnight here!” she protests, stopping Ocean from standing.

“Penny, I have to go.”

“Really, getting the spare mattress out won’t be too big of a deal,” Penny assures. “It’s just for one night. Dianne won’t mind, I promise.”

Penny smiles at Ocean. Ocean simply stares back at Penny, her expression unreadable. Eventually, she sighs.

“Alright, fine.”

Penny grins at Ocean, who averts her gaze in return. Not that Penny really cares. She’s just happy to spend time with Ocean again.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

Penny notices Ocean stiffen. Was that the wrong thing to say? “Yes, Penny. I’m fine,” Ocean responds, crossing her arms. Penny smiles at her.

“You’ve been acting weird recently. I just… I know something’s wrong. I just want you to tell me.”

“Penny, stop. I already told you, I’m fine.”

“Is it Brandon? I really think he’s–”

“Penny! Look, I know you hate him, but could you please lay off for three freaking minutes ?” Ocean snaps, standing up and grabbing her bag. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she mutters through gritted teeth, leaving before Penny has the chance to protest or apologise. Yep, that was the wrong thing to say.

Penny sighs and flops back in her bed, staring at the ceiling. God, why can’t she just shut up? Maybe Ocean is getting sick of her. She wouldn’t really blame her.

Taking a deep breath, Penny rolls over and pulls the blanket over herself, not even bothering to change. She can fix things. Tomorrow.

Penny sits in the choir room, nervously picking at the corner of her music sheet. She came early so she’d have time to talk to Ocean, but she might have come a bit too early. Half an hour early, to be exact. Still, it’s better than having to stay even longer after school.

Still staring at the sheet, Penny tears a bit off and fiddles with the tiny bit of paper. After what feels like an eternity of anxiously waiting, the door opens. Ocean seems to be in a better mood since last night, but it seems to immediately sour once she spots Penny.

“Hi! Ocean. Um, I wanted to talk to you,” Penny greets, standing up to approach her.

Ocean eyes her cautiously. “Fine. Just don’t cause any trouble.”

“I won’t. I promise,” Penny assures, smiling. Ocean just nods and begins to set up the choir room, with Penny standing there watching her. “I… I wanted to say I’m sorry. Um, about last night.”

That makes Ocean pause and look up at her. She doesn’t reply, though.

“About everything I said, I mean,” Penny adds. “I just… you’ve been acting weird recently, and I can tell you’re not okay, and I want to help, but I don’t really know what to do about it.” She steps towards Ocean. Ocean doesn’t back away. That’s a good sign, right?

“Don’t apologise,” Ocean responds, before sighing. “Well, yes, apologise. But I suppose I was a little bit of a jerk to you. So I guess I’m… I’ll try to work on my behaviour.”

Penny laughs. “You will?”

“I will.”

“Look, Ocean, you were the first person to be nice to me when I first came here. Hell, you’re the first person to actually call yourself my friend in… a long time.”

“Where is this going?”

“I already told you a few weeks ago, but I’ll say it again. If something’s wrong, tell me. Please.” Penny smiles, but Ocean averts her gaze, sitting down on one of the chairs. Penny wants to say something else, but forces herself to stay silent. Don’t rush her, she reminds herself.

“Okay,” Ocean eventually says, uncharacteristically quiet. “Okay. I don’t really like Brandon.”

Well, who would've guessed? Penny bites back the sarcastic retort. Ocean is actually opening up to her. But Penny knows that one wrong move, one little nudge too far, one question too sensitive, and it’ll all come crashing down.

“I- I don’t really want to be with him…” Ocean adds, her hands moving to her lap.

“So why do you stay?”

Ocean falls silent once more, seemingly debating her answer. Eventually, she replies with, “I need him. Without him, everyone will think–… I- I just need him.”

“Why do you care what everyone thinks?” Penny sits down next to Ocean, placing a hand on her shoulder.

Ocean glares at Penny like she just asked her why grass is green. “My reputation’s important! Especially with what I’m working towards. I need a good reputation. I need good grades, and if I fail at that- if- if I fail, then my whole life’s ruined!”

“I think that’s a little dramatic,” Penny laughs. And then she feels Ocean pull out of her grip. Damn it. Why the hell did I say that?

“I am not being dramatic! I have genuine concerns for my future, and I’m sorry if that confuses you, but we can’t all be depressed Walmart greeters when we grow up!” Ocean snaps, suddenly standing up.

“Ocean, calm down–”

“Don’t tell me to freaking calm down!”

“ Ocean! I know your life isn’t great right now, but you don’t need to be a jerk about it!” Penny counters, meeting Ocean’s glare with her own.

For a moment, Penny spots tears forming in Ocean’s eyes, but they’re wiped away before they have a chance to fall. “ You don’t know what my life is like!”

The two are interrupted by Constance walking in. She smiles at Ocean, but the smile is almost immediately wiped off her face.

“You’re late,” Ocean hisses.

“Oh, sorry. I was–”

“Don’t ‘ sorry’ me! Next time, actually try to be on time! I know having something important to do is a foreign concept to you, but some of us are destined to be more than a sad organ donor with no ambitions!”

“Jesus Christ, Ocean! Stop that!” Penny interrupts.

“No!” Ocean shouts, whipping around to face Penny. “I’m actually working towards something, I’m- I’m building a life! And what are you doing? Sitting in the corner hiding from everyone? Where will that get you in life? Nowhere! You’re gonna end up being a miserable, working class weirdo with social anxiety and an overdrawn credit card!”

Ouch . “Ocean, come on…”

“None of you are going to be anything in life! None of you get what I’m working towards! So stop telling me what’s good and bad for me, because I’m sick of it!” She yells, before storming off. “Choir’s freaking cancelled!” she adds, slamming the door behind her.

Penny glances at Constance. She’s standing there with her head bowed and a hurt look on her face.

“Constance, are you..?”

Constance forces a laugh and shakes her head, a strange noise escaping her throat. “No, I’m fine. Ocean’s just like that sometimes. She gets super defensive. I mean, it’s never been this bad before, but I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Mhm,” Constance hums, clearly lying. “I’m fine. I just… I have to go,” she adds quietly, before leaving the room before Penny can ask any more questions. 

Penny decides there’s no point in staying, and follows, passing Noel, Mischa and Ricky on the way out. She mutters a small “Choir’s cancelled” before leaving the school and walking home for the day.

Chapter Text

Penny stares at her textbook blankly, not focusing on the teacher droning on about Shakespere or whatever this session’s topic is. Except this time, it’s not because of daydreaming. It’s because of the girl literally sitting right next to her, courtesy of the teacher’s assigned seating. 

Ocean. She’s literally inches away. Penny has an apology right on the tip of her tongue. All she has to do is lean over a little to the left and talk to her. But she can’t bring herself to do it. She’s going over the conversations over and over in her head, imagining almost every single response Ocean could give. It feels so easy when she thinks about it. And yet, she just can’t do it. So she sits there, lesson after lesson, staring at Ocean in a futile attempt to work up the courage to talk.

It’s pathetic. Penny’s told herself that multiple times. It’s been two weeks since the… incident , yet she can’t just talk to her . So, she glances at Ocean constantly, mulling over how to phrase it, how Ocean might respond, how Ocean would phrase it…

Penny averts her gaze, instead staring at the exact same page of the textbook for the hundredth time even though the teacher has probably moved on by now. 

Penny continues her usual routine of staring at the textbook, then at Ocean, then at the textbook again until the bell rings. And then Ocean stands up.

There’s still time to talk to her.

Just go up to her.

Apologise.

It’s not that hard.

She’s right there!

Penny stands up and opens her mouth to say something, but she can’t do it. She chickens out at the last moment. And instead, she watches Ocean walk out the door.

“Dang it,” Penny hisses under her breath, shoving her stuff into her bag and leaving the classroom.

This is hopeless. 

For the first time in a while, Penny decides against joining Ocean and Constance for lunch, instead choosing to climb the tree near the front of the school. She sits on her usual branch, watching some other kids play football. She hasn’t sat up here since Ocean decided to become her friend.

“I think that’s a little dramatic.”

Penny groans and buries her face in her hands. Why did she say that? She can’t help but replay the interaction in her head. The way Ocean’s face changed the second the word ‘dramatic’ left her mouth. 

God… why did I say that?

She’s never seen Ocean behave like that before. She’s always been a bit… hostile sometimes, but she’s never lashed out like that. And Penny caused it. All because of one stupid, avoidable sentence.

“Penny?”

Penny looks up, realises she’s in a tree, then looks down to see Constance standing beneath her, smiling awkwardly.

“Is it alright if I join you?”

“Sure!” Penny answers, grinning and reaching down a hand to Constance. Constance stares at it uncertainly.

“Oh… I was kinda hoping you could come down.”

“Ah.” Penny hops down to the ground and nearly faceplants. The two smile at each other and sit down on the grass, and an awkward silence ensues. The two never really spoke much. They just had a mutual friend.

“So, the weather’s nice,” Constance says. Penny looks up to the clouds. It’s a sunny day.

“Yeah. It is.”

“I heard it’s gonna rain tomorrow.”

“Yeah. Me too.”

“Do you have an umbrella?”

“Yeah. I do.”

“Me too.”

“Cool.”

“Cool.”

More awkward silence. Constance picks at the bark of the tree. Penny begins to daydream.

She has to stop daydreaming once Ocean appears in the daydreams, though. It’s frustrating, really. Since they started getting close, Ocean has taken over Penny’s thoughts. Even something completely unrelated can turn into Ocean.

“Are you okay?”

Penny blinks at looks up, realising she had begun tearing grass up from the ground. “Oh. Um… yeah. Sorry.”

“Okay.”

“I was just zoned out.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

“You say that a lot.”

“Sorry.”

Penny laughs. “You just said it again.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

Penny watches her in amusement.

“Sorry!”

“You don’t have to apologise so much.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“I noticed.”

Constance giggles a bit, and Penny smiles at her. It’s nice, actually interacting for once.

“Does Ocean usually insult you?”

Constance’s smile fades. “What?”

“Two weeks ago. You said that Ocean is ‘like that sometimes’, so…” Penny pauses, noticing the way Constance’s cheery attitude has gone. “Nevermind.”

“No, it’s fine,” Constance replies, forcing a smile. The dreaded awkward silence returns.

“So, uh… how long are you staying in Uranium for?” Constance speaks up after what feels like an hour.

“Huh?” Penny blinks back into reality, then smiles. “Oh. Six months.”

“So you’re here for four more months?”

“Yep. Unless Dianne decides to adopt me. Then I guess I’m staying for good.”

“Oh, your foster mom’s Dianne?” Constance asks, suddenly grinning.

“Yeah. She’s nice.”

“She’s a regular at the café! She’s always been really nice to me and my brother.”

“You have a brother?”

“Yep!” Constance seems to light up even more. Penny can’t help but smile too. “He’s really sweet! And he loves ABBA so much, one time I saw him dance naked to it! He wouldn’t be caught dead doing it now that he’s nine, but he’s still a dork!”

“I used to have a brother,” Penny giggles. “His name was Ezra!”

“Really? Where is he now?”

“I dunno. The foster care system separated us.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

Penny smiles. “It’s fine. I don’t remember him much anyway. Besides, I like listening to people. How do you think I can stand Ocean?”

Constance’s smile softens a bit, and her gaze shifts to the ground.

“Sorry. Bad joke,” Penny says quietly, picking at the grass again.

“No, it’s just… she wasn’t always like this, you know.”

Penny nods, unable to bother thinking of a response.

“I don’t know what happened. Maybe she just… grew up. But she used to be really sweet. Kind of like you.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. And then eventually, she just… changed. And she got all mean, and started overworking herself and stuff, and… I dunno why I never moved on. Maybe I’m, like, dependent on her or something. Or maybe I stay because I hope some part of that old her is still there.”

Okay. How exactly did this conversation get here again?

“She hasn’t had a new friend since me. Until you came along, obviously. Why did you start being friends with her? She’s not exactly the most… likeable person.”

“I started because at first she seemed nice.”

“Why’d you stay?”

Why did I stay? Penny picks at the grass again as that stupid girl once again invades her thoughts. God, I love her…

Wait.

Oh.

Penny freezes in place. ‘Entertainment’?  God, I’m an idiot. It’s much more than entertainment. I’m I love with Ocean freaking Rosenberg. Well, fu—

“Is Ocean still not talking to you?”

Penny is once more pulled out of her thoughts by Constance. “Huh-? Oh! Um, no. What about you?”

“No,” Constance answers sadly. 

Penny awkwardly clears her throat. Oh god. I have a crush on Ocean, of all people. Someone please kill me now. “S-so, uh…”

“So, what do we do now?”

“What?”

“What do we do now?

“I don’t know,” Penny admits. “I’m still trying to talk to her. It’s stupid, but… I can fix this. I know I can.”

“Okay. Well—“ Before Constance can finish, the bell rings. Damn it. “It was nice talking to you for once. Maybe you can visit my house sometime?” Constance offers.

“Sure,” Penny agrees, standing up and wiping grass off of her skirt and socks.

I can fix this.

Penny stands in the doorway of her room, staring at the spot Ocean usually sat during their study sessions. So much is finally making sense now, and she feels like an idiot for not realising it sooner.

Of everyone in school, It had to be Ocean. Are you kidding me?

She saunters over to her window and pushes it open, sticking her head out to deduce how slippery the roof will be. It’s mostly dry, so she scrambles up onto the roof, staring at the horizon. The sky is cloudy, but she can still see the sun through gaps. 

It feels like forever ago she sat here with Ocean, watching the sun set. She had accidentally called her beautiful. She really did mean it. And it was just the two of them, together, with nothing between them. No Brandon, no argument, nothing. What she would give to relive that night.

Maybe she can. If she tries.

I’m going to fix things.

Chapter Text

Ocean groans and rolls over in her bed, nearly falling out of it. And then she opens her eyes, squinting up at her run down bedroom ceiling.

Either way, Ocean’s disappointed by what she sees. Her room is completely dim. No sunlight. Just miserable, grey clouds. Well, and a crap ton of rain. On the bright side, her parents don’t seem to be home.

Ocean’s eyes wander around her room, eventually settling on the alarm clock that reads…

Uh oh.

Ocean shoots off of her bed and rushes downstairs, grabbing an overripe apple, shoving her stuff into her bag and putting on her headband. She’s glad she slept in her uniform again. She’d probably be late if she had to change.

When she returns to her room to search for her PE clothes, she spots something she wrote last night. A sticky note plastered right in the middle of her mirror, reading:

TALK TO CONSTANCE!!!!!!!!!!

Right. She’d forgotten about that. She planned to apologise to Constance. She feels bad for roping her into her argument with Penny. She’s about to start pondering things when she remembers the time and almost stumbles down the stairs trying to make it to the front door.

Ocean sits on the bleachers, frowning at a piece of gum that someone has stuck onto the metal. She looks up to once again see Penny not-so-subtly staring at her through the corner of her eye. She always thinks Penny is going to talk to her, but it never happens. Ocean can’t tell if she’s happy about that or not.

Constance is sitting out too, as usual, on the other end of the court. Ocean… actually doesn’t know why Constance sits out. She’s never bothered asking. Huh. Either way, if Ocean is spotted on the court, Brandon is going to berate her for cheating and going back on when she’s not meant to. At least she’s been spared from being his personal cheerleader.

Ocean stares right back at Penny for once, which seems to fluster Penny and make her look away. For some reason that just makes Ocean more frustrated.

Why can’t that girl make sense for three damn seconds? 

Noel approaches Penny and they start talking, with Noel shooting Ocean a glare halfway through their conversation. Ocean just glares back. Penny stops Noel from approaching her and says something to him that seems to calm him down.

Ocean works out what classes she’ll have with Constance. PE, now…then she has English later on, but Penny’s in that class too. Social sciences is probably her best bet. Constance is there. So is Ricky. The rest of her classes don’t have any of the choir members in them. She deduces that social sciences is the best subject to talk to Constance, since Ricky doesn’t talk to either of them anyways. Not that he can. Was that ableist? No. I let him into the choir. I’m not ableist.

Ocean sighs and pulls a pen out from her bag, writing another note to talk to Constance.

Ocean looks over her notes as the rest of the class packs up. She needs them to be perfect. She crosses out words and rephrases things to be easier to understand. Of course, she’s just biding her time. She can understand her own notes perfectly well. But it’s all she can really think of doing while she waits for Constance to be available. Right now she’s chatting with the teacher about an upcoming assignment. So, Ocean waits. And waits. And waits some more.

And then Constance steps away from her teacher, so Ocean shoves her books into her bag and approaches her.

“Hey, Constance!”

“Oh, Ocean. Hi.”

Ocean flashes Constance one of her ‘Most Successful Girl In Town’ smiles. “I wanted to apologise for what I said a few weeks ago.”

Constance gives her an incredulous look. “Really?”

“Well, yeah. I shouldn’t have roped you into the argument. I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”

Ocean keeps smiling. Constance frowns. “Did you mean it?”

“No! Of course not! Your future’s not set in stone!”

Why on earth did I just say that?

“Ocean?”

“Yeah?”

“You should leave.”

Ocean pauses, her smile dropping. “...What?”

“No! It’s been years, and you’ve never actually cared!”

That’s not true. I care, Constance.

“I–”

You weren’t trying to help, you were trying to just get me to forgive you! Again! Well, I’m done!”

“Constance, I didn’t mean–”

“You did mean it! You’ve hurt me so, so many times! And you still keep doing it. Why do you hate me so much?”

“I don’t hate you!” Ocean protests.
You’re my best friend.
“If anything, I envy you. You’re content with doing nothing! You don’t know what it’s like to be stressed, or under pressure, or worrying about what others think of you!”

“You don’t envy me, Ocean. You don’t even know what my life is like! You haven’t even bothered getting to know me since second grade! You’re not the only one with issues, Ocean! And just ‘cause you’re sad doesn’t mean you can make everyone else sad too!”

“But that wasn’t– I never said–” Ocean can’t get any words out. She can’t tell if it’s because she has nothing to say or too much to say. So she stands there silently, letting Constance’s words sink in.

“Just leave me alone, Ocean.”

Ocean doesn’t argue back. She just leaves, keeping her gaze fixed to the ground.

I care about her. Why can’t she see that?

And why have I never said it before?

The empty feeling soon grows into anger. At what, Ocean isn’t entirely sure. She’s just angry, and hurt, and confused, and–

I need some air…

Without a second thought, she pushes her way outside and sits on the steps to the school’s main entrance. It’s peaceful out here. Quiet. The rain’s soothing. Except for when it gets in her hair, which’ll be all frizzy when it dries. That just makes her frustrated again.

Doing her best to calm herself, Ocean takes a deep breath, watching the rain slowly fill up a puddle forming at her feet. Maybe if she stares at it hard enough it’ll become a sinkhole and make her disappear.

Have I really been that bad?

No. None of this is my fault. Is it?

Ocean wipes some hair out of her face. There’s still some more plastered to her skin, but she can’t be bothered moving it out of the way. If she stays outside too long she’s going to get sick.

“Don’t ‘ sorry ’ me! Next time, actually try to be on time! I know having something important to do is a foreign concept to you, but some of us are destined to be more than a sad organ donor with no ambitions!”

“None of you are going to be anything in life! None of you get what I’m working towards! So stop telling me what’s good and bad for me, because I’m sick of it!”

Ocean groans and buries her face in her hands.

Why am I like this?

She’s soaked by now. The thought of going inside is too far gone for her to bother with it. She just shivers and crosses her arms in a futile attempt to warm herself up. She sniffles again. A worm comes up from the ground and starts wriggling around. Ocean shudders and shuffles away from it.

She sits there, watching the water hit the ground for who knows how long. The sky seems to keep getting darker and darker. Eventually she hears some footsteps behind her, but she pays it no mind. Until a school sweater is pulled over her head. And adjusted until Ocean’s head is through the neck hole.

“You really need to start wearing warm clothes. Now, come on. Arms,” the person instructs.

Penny?

Ocean obliges, pushing her arms through the sleeves. The sweater actually helps a lot.

“Why are you here?” Ocean asks, surprised at how quiet her own voice sounds.

Penny doesn’t reply, instead handing Ocean a worn stuffed bear. It’s old. Patches of fur are missing, there are poorly stitched up tears, and one eye has completely fallen off. But it’s still recognisable as a bear. Ocean stares at it for a bit.

“For when you’re sad.”

“Why are you here?” Ocean repeats in response, now ignoring the bear altogether.

“I wanna talk.”

Ocean scowls down at the ground. “Well, I don’t.”

Penny makes some weird noise that Ocean can’t be bothered to try and find the meaning of.

“I’m sorry. About… you know. I pushed too far, and I shouldn’t have.”

“Yeah. You did.”

“I don’t think it’s dramatic. It’s normal. To worry about your future, I mean. I wasn’t calling you crazy or anything.”

Ocean doesn’t answer. Penny is the last person she wants to see right now.

I hate her.

“What I meant was… you’re making yourself miserable. And it makes me miserable too. I just… I don’t know how to make you stop.”

“You don’t need to. You don’t know anything about me, Penny. Stop acting like you do,” Ocean hisses, feeling her frustration grow.

“No. I don’t. But… I’d like to. If you’ll let me.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now. Just go.”

“...I know you’re still mad at me. I get it. I’m sorry.”

Ocean bites the inside of her cheek. “You don’t get it. Just leave.”

“Okay. Okay, I’ll leave. I know you probably wish I was dead right now. But… if you ever need someone, I’ll be there for you if you want me to be.”

And with that, Ocean hears Penny leave.

Stupid Penny.

I hate you.

I hate you.

Ocean glares down at the bear, her nails digging into the worn fabric.

Why do you care so much?

Ocean keeps her gaze on the ground as she makes her way home. It’s still wet. She’s still wet too, and she forgot to give back Penny’s sweater. Oh well. She can return it later. 

She stops in her tracks when she reaches her house. The hippie van is parked outside. And the windows are wide open.

They’re home early.

Steeling herself, Ocean cautiously approaches the front door, opens it, and steps inside. Both of her parents seem to be asleep on the couch. Thank god. She’s about a metre from the stairs when…

“Hey, Storm!”

Ocean winces and turns around to face her father. “It’s… it’s Ocean.”

“I fuckin’ named you. I call you whatever the hell I want.”

Ocean nods, keeping her head bowed. Her heart is pounding in her chest as her father steps closer and looms over her. God, she can smell the weed on his breath. 

“I- I’m just going to do my homework…” she stutters out quietly.

“Come on, you’re so tense,” he slurs out. “Take a hit. Just one. Let nature take over you.”

“No thank you…” Ocean flinches as the joint is shoved in her face. She yelps and smacks it out of her father’s hand, burning her own in the process. Oh no.

“You kiddin’ me? Do you know how fucking expensive high quality weed is nowadays? You spoiled little-”

Ocean runs up the stairs before her father can finish his sentence. She just runs as fast as her body will allow her. Maybe she should’ve joined in during PE today…

A hand latches onto her ankle, and Ocean shrieks as she falls to the ground. Her legs feel like jelly; she couldn’t get up if she tried. So she does the last thing she can do. Squeeze her eyes tight and brace herself for what’s coming.

Ocean curls in on herself as a single searing pain spreads all throughout her body, like she’s drowning in fire. She can’t even tell where she’s being hit anymore. She doesn’t feel like she’s in her own body. She’s half convinced she’s been killed, But no, the sounds of his voice shouting insults is all too close and real. Tears form in her eyes, but she doesn’t let herself cry. She won’t let him have that. Just when Ocean thinks she actually will die, her father stops, and makes his way out of the room. Ocean is left shaking and bleeding on the floor, still refusing to let tears spill. Her throat is raw. She hadn’t even realised she’d been using it.

Once she manages to muster the strength to move, Ocean pulls herself into her room and up onto her bed with shaky arms. She doesn’t want to know how bad she looks. 

I just need to rest.  

Everything will be okay. Just go to sleep.

Unsurprisingly, sleep doesn’t come. The searing pain has morphed into a dull ache, and she feels like she’s being crushed to death. With a weak, shaky hand she reaches her phone and dials Constance’s number. Her call is declined. She calls again in desperation.

Please.

Still, nothing. Giving up, Ocean spots the stuffed toy Penny gave her. She can’t believe that stupid thing is actually helping. She grabs it and pulls it close, sobbing quietly into the cheap fabric. And eventually, she begins to drift off.

Chapter Text

Penny stares at her cereal blankly, her brain still waking up. Her breakfast is soggy by now, but she’s too lazy to pour some more, so she just sort of stares at it, trying to will it back into crunchiness. 

It doesn’t work.

Her foster mother’s voice is sort of just a dull murmur in the background.

“Okay, you know where the leftovers are, so just heat those up for dinner, okay?”

“Mmm.”

“And if the house gets too cold, turn on the heater, I don’t mind.”

“Mhmm.”

“I’ll call you if I’m going to be coming home early, alright?”

“Mhm.”

“And your keys are in your bag?”

“Mhm.”

“Penny, are you listening?”

Penny looks up from her bowl. “Huh?”

Her foster mother sighs, shaking her head. “Nevermind, I’ll just write the instructions down.”

“What instructions?”

“I’m working late tonight.”

“Oh. Okay.” Penny returns to staring at her bowl of mush.

“Good luck at school today!”

“Mhm.”

Ocean rushes into the classroom, making it just as the bell rings, and makes her way to her desk. The other students stare at her. Oh well. They’re easy to ignore anyways.

Ocean takes a seat, wincing a bit at her still sore body. She notices her limbs trembling, and does her best to suppress it. She woke up late for the first time in years, if ever, and she had to rush to get ready. She didn’t even have time to dress her wounds, and she can feel a few of them opening up already.

Why does it never end?

“Miss Rosenberg?”

“What?”

“You’re bleeding,” her teacher points out, shooting Ocean a look of pity. Ocean twists around, and is able to catch a slight glimpse of red staining her uniform.

“I… had an accident on my way to school. I’ll be alright,” she responds quickly, her voice raw and unstable. Her voice won’t cooperate, and her whole body aches. Wonderful .

Ocean glares down at the table, a potent mix of emotions filling her. She hears the teacher speaking, but the words don’t register in her brain. So she watches the teacher return to the whiteboard, finally relieved up until she feels someone tapping on her shoulder.

“Ocean? Are you okay?”

Ocean tenses up at the sound of Penny’s voice. It’s so soft, and sweet, and she hates the sound of it. So, so much.

“Did your parents… you know… Do you need help?”

“I’m fine,” Ocean tries to whisper, her fingernails digging into her desk.

Why do you care?

Just go away. I don’t want you here.

“...Sorry. Um… Take it easy, okay?”

Ocean stays silent, an exhale of relief escaping her as the warmth of Penny’s hand disappears. She’s suddenly made all too aware of the wounds all over her body again, a pained noise nearly escaping her. In an attempt to draw her attention away from the pain, she looks down at her exercise book, going over her notes from the previous day. Half the words are crossed out. It looks like they were rewritten for a five year old to understand. She runs her fingers through her own hair and copies down new notes from what she can remember of the previous day.

By the time the first break rolls around, Ocean is already exhausted. She hasn’t gotten this little sleep in years. Her brain’s already foggy, and she’s not really processing where in the school she is. She ends up outside of the school, on the same steps as the previous day. It looks a little damp, but Ocean sits anyway. She stares at where the puddle once was. There’s a shrivelled brown thing that Ocean soon realises is the worm she’d seen. Gross .

“Hey, look! Up there on the roof!”

Ocean looks up at the source of the voice - Penny’s voice, up in her tree - only to realise she’s addressing constance.

Obviously.

Ocean watches on as Constance looks up, and Penny seems to be spouting some nonsense facts about whatever she’s spotted by the way she’s grinning. Constance’s smile grows too as Penny helps her up onto a low branch so she can get a better view. Ocean gets a sinking feeling in her stomach at the sight.

She’d forgotten what Constance’s smile looked like. Her actual smile. That thought makes the feeling worse, so Ocean looks away. But she can still hear Penny’s stupid voice chattering away, and Constance laughing about something, and it’s like some sort of god is taunting her.

“Hey, you know the only two people who actually cared about you? Yeah, well, you screwed them over, so here’s them getting along just fine without you!”

Ocean’s grip on her books tighten, which just makes her whole body protest and suddenly she’s hyper aware of her injuries.

Could this day get any worse?

Ocean finds herself staring at Penny and Constance, then down at her books again, then at her friends.

Damn it all.

Relief fills Ocean as the bell prevents her from spiraling any more. But the relief is short lived when she realises she has an entire day of school left.

So she stands up, ignoring the sharp pain that shoots up her body, and stiffly walks off to her next class.

Penny hops down from the tree, almost slipping and face planting, but Constance helps keep her balanced. She shoots her an awkward grin, and walks back into the main school building. She catches a glimpse of familiar red hair, but she decides to leave Ocean alone, as much as the decision may break her heart.

Why did I have to fall in love with her of all people?

Instead, she walks with Constance to their next class - which is, thankfully, shared.

“Hey, why does everyone hate the mall?”

“Which mall?”

“You know. Uranium City Mega Mall? The giant one just outside of the main town? Kinda hard to miss?”

“Oh! Right. I don’t really know. Everyone just… hates it. A lot.”

Penny nods, humming thoughtfully. “I went there with Noel once. Didn’t seem too bad. He, uh… he ran away from Taco Bell, though.”

“That’s because he works there,” Constance explains, grinning.

“Ah,” Penny snickers. “That makes sense.”

The two descend into another silence as they enter the classroom. Penny can’t think of anything else to say, so she stays silent. So does Constance, so she figures she doesn’t know what to talk about either. Things are sort of weird between them. They’re getting closer now, sure, but their relationship is all thanks to Ocean, it’s hard to not talk about her . It’s the one thing they have in common. She goes over the rest of her classes in her head. She only has three classes with Ocean today. It shouldn’t be too hard to sit on the other side of the classroom, she supposes.

Ocean finally stops in front of her house, staring down the path she just walked along. It’s not a very long walk, but for some reason today it felt like it took an hour. The house looks empty, but the front door is slightly ajar, so someone must be home. Taking a deep breath, Ocean steps through it. Oddly enough, her mother is home, but nobody is smoking weed. Her father is nowhere to be seen.

“Ocean?” her mother asks quietly, standing at the kitchen counter.

Ocean tilts her head, her gaze flickering over to the bathroom. If she leaves her wounds any longer they’ll probably get infected. Which is kind of the last thing she wants right now. “Yeah?”

“I’d like to talk,” her mother replies, carrying a plate of sandwiches over to the dining table and setting it down. “Would you like a cheese sandwich, dear?”

Ocean can’t help the look of disgust that makes its way onto her face. “Ugh… No thank you.”

“Alright.” Her mother takes a bite of a sandwich, and Ocean does her best not to physically recoil. “So… about last night.”

Oh, great.

“...What about it?” Ocean asks, feeling self stepping away. The hairs on the back of her neck prick up.

“Don’t blame your father. He just gets mad sometimes, you know how he is.”

“He just gets mad”. Really? Ocean’s hands curl into fists, but she fights back any biting comments she wants to make. They won’t end well.

“He was high at the time, he wasn’t in his right mind. You know he loves you, dear.”

“He has a funny way of showing it,” Ocean mutters sharply, once again becoming all too aware of the pain she’s in.

Ocean’s mother sighs and pulls out a freshly rolled joint, lighting it and taking a hit. “You just have to avoid upsetting him.”

“Stop it.”

“...would you like a hit, dear?”

Ocean glares at the joint, the foul smell filling her nose. She holds her beath. “No.”

“Are you sure? Just one.”

“I’m sure .”

“It’ll loosen you up, dear.”

Ocean bites the inside of her cheek, glaring at her mother. “I don’t want to smoke.”

“Ocean,” her mother warns, her tone suddenly darker.

A shiver shoots up Ocean’s spine. She doesn’t have a choice, does she? So she hesitantly takes it, brings it up to her lips and inhales the smoke, immediately coughing it out and tossing it back to her mother.

God, that’s disgusting.

“Well?”

Ocean rushes to her room, ignoring her mother’s question. Locking the door behind her, Ocean keels over and coughs a bit more, unable to get the strange sensation out of her lungs. Sucking in a few weak breaths, Ocean straightens herself up and dumps the contents of her bag all over her desk, continuously clearing her throat.

Why on earth do they smoke that stuff?

Ocean picks up her textbook and flips through it, trying to shake clear the fain buzz that’s entered her mind.

How much cannabis was in that joint?

Her notes are immaculate, as always. So she stands up, spotting the teddy bear still lying in her bed. And the school sweatshirt that Penny gave her. She picks up the bear.

Their addiction’s going to kill them.

Some are destined to do nothing in life, I suppose.

I guess it’s up to people like me to give humanity a good name.

Ocean wraps it up in the sweatshirt and lets it drop to the ground, kicking it under her bed. Teddy bears are for children anyways.

The world could do without people like them.

Ocean sits down on her bed, glaring at her wall.

I can’t let them hold me back. I can’t .

Chapter Text

“Okay, one chicken chalupa supreme and two chipotle crunch burritos?”

“Yep.”

Noel rings in the order with a frown on his face, watching the receipt print itself out at a snail’s pace. “Come back in ten minutes. Your order should be ready by then,” Noel says as politely as possible, tearing off the receipt and handing it to the customer. The customer thanks him and leaves, letting the person behind them step forward.

“Welcome to Taco Bell,” Noel sighs. “What’s your order?”

“Huh? Oh, um… a taco?”

Noel looks up from the counter to see none other than Penny grinning at him. “Oh, son of a– what are you doing here? How did you know I worked here?”

“I kinda just saw you,” Penny answers with a shrug. “So that’s why you ran away from the taco bell last time we came here…”

“Yeah, great. Are you gonna order?”

“Yeah. I just ordered a taco.”

“What kind of taco?”

“There are different types of tacos?”

Noel scoffs. “Yes, Penny. There are different types of tacos. Now, are you going to choose one or not?”

“Uh… crunchy taco?”

“That’s not how– oh, goddamn it, nevermind. I’ll just get you some nachos.”

“Thanks!”

Noel puts the order in and gives Penny the receipt, letting the line continue to move.

Finally able to take that stupid blue apron and hat off, Noel breathes a sigh of relief and leaves the restaurant, only to be bombarded by Penny still munching on her nachos.

“So… Taco Bell? Really?”

“I need to work somewhere, we have no money!” Noel protests defensively, crossing his arms. “I’m saving up to move to France."

“Sure, but… Taco Bell?”

“Oh, shut up.”

“Is it true that in American Taco Bells the workers have to wear sombreros?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Penny, why are you here?” Noel asks, huffing in exasperation. 

“I don’t know, Penny responds with a shrug. “I don’t have anywhere better to be, I guess.”

Noel rolls his eyes, gesturing for Penny to follow him. “Okay, come on. Let’s watch a movie or something.”

“Sounds good,” Penny replies, running to catch up to Noel. He glances towards Penny. She seems to be in a pretty good mood today. She has a certain spring in her step, and is humming a tune that Noel thinks he knows from somewhere, but he can’t quite recall where.

The movie theatre isn’t too far from Taco Bell. To be fair, it’s Uranium City Mega Mall, and literally everything is close, but the food court and the cinema are still exceptionally close. It’s the one tolerable part of the mall. Noel doubts anyone would miss the damn building if it burned to the ground.

Noel looks over the various options for movies. It’s usually the same 20 movies rotated around each day like a roster, but every now and then there’s something new.

There’s that shitty zombie movie he watched with Penny about a month ago. Some dumb alien movie. One of the Saw movies is playing. And then some weird movie called ‘Uranium Teen Screams: Legoland’. Who the hell decided to show that in a town called Uranium City?

“Anything you find interesting?” Noel asks, still skimming the list of movie options.

“Mm… what about this one?”

Noel turns to look at what movie Penny’s pointing to. Looks like a new movie. It’s called Caroline but they spelt it weird.

“Maybe,” he concedes. “But it’s not showing today.”

“Oh. Um… what about this one?” Penny asks, now pointing at a werewolf movie. Noel tilts his head at it, considering it. It seems kind of interesting.

“Fuck it. Why not,” he sighs, shrugging. “I don’t care what we watch. I just need a break.”

Penny nods, her spirits seemingly lifted, and rushes up to the counter to buy two tickets. Noel stands behind her, watching her pay and immediately shy away from the social interaction the second it’s over.

Noel watches the movie with a bored expression on his face. It’s nothing special. Better than the zombie movie they watched, at least. And Penny is either enjoying it or zoning out. It’s hard to tell. She’s sort of just staring at the screen blank-faced, hardly even blinking.

Noel looks around the near-empty cinema. There are only four other people in there, four of which Noel already knows. When did Uranium get so small?

He still vaguely remembers when Uranium actually had a population. Now, Uranium’s nothing but a pathetic little echo of what it used to be. It’s not even on most maps anymore.

Looking back over to Penny, Noel notices her slumped over in her chair, eyes shut. She must’ve fallen asleep. Safe to assume she wasn’t enjoying the movie, then. She’s always so quiet around others. It’s easy to forget that she came from the city. She must miss it sometimes. Or maybe she prefers the peace and quiet of Uranium. What would her life have been like in the city? Maybe the foster home she was in was like that house in Annie. Forced to toil away for a horrible woman, yet still turning out well despite a past of misery and despair.

Well, more likely she was just kind of awkward. But where’s the drama in that?

Once the credits begin to roll for the movie, Noel rouses Penny. “Morning,” he huffs. “Have a nice nap?”

“Huh…?” Penny murmurs groggily.

“Are we going home or not?”

“Mhm… just a second…” Penny groans, burying her face in her hands. Noel has a feeling ‘just a second’ won’t actually last a second, so he stands up and drags a protesting Penny out of the cinema by the wrist.

As they walk out, Penny suddenly stops, which means Noel stumbles forward and almost falls. He whips around to glare at Penny, maybe make a sarcastic quip, but Penny is staring blankly at something else.

Rather, someone else.

Ocean O’Connell Rosenberg.

In other words, if Satan was a fussy teenager with traffic-cone orange hair and a voice more high pitched than a damn mosquito, that would be her.

Noel lets go of Penny, crossing his arms as Ocean walks up to them with a scowl on her face.

“What are you doing at the mall?” she snaps. 

Jesus, she’s even more bitchy than usual.

Penny blinks, confusion showing on her face.

This can’t be good, Noel decides.

“I’m hanging out with Noel. Why?”

“Of course you are,” Ocean huffs. “People like you always stick together.”

Noel scowls, joining into the conversation. “People like us? The fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“Language,” Ocean scolds, leaving Noel still waiting for an answer. “You should be studying, not relaxing. There’s an exam coming up, you know. Are you two trying to fail?”

“No I’m not. Ocean, are you–”

Noel grabs her arm and begins to guide her away, deciding an argument isn’t worth it. “Go find your boyfriend,” he snaps, scowling at Ocean as he leaves. “Just leave us alone.”

“What? Noel, Ocean’s–”

“Just come on.” 

Noel glances back at Ocean, who just stands there, staring after Penny with an unreadable look on her face. But something’s going on in her head.

“Noel, what are you doing? It’s just Ocean.”

“Exactly. Don’t waste your breath on her.”

Penny falls silent. Noel looks back to make sure she’s still following him, meeting her frustrated glare.

“I know you care about her, Penny. After all the times she’s hurt you, it’s admirable that you still do. But she’s not–”

Noel stops when Penny yanks her arm free, glaring at him.

“I know you hate her, Noel,” Penny huffs. “That doesn’t mean I will too.”

Noel shakes his head at her. “That’s not what I’m saying.”

“Then what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that it doesn’t matter how much you care about her, or reassure her, or make her feel like she matters. She’s impossible to get close to.”

“...That’s not true.”

“You don’t know her like I do, Penny. No matter how close you think you are with her, the second something happens she’ll turn on you and treat you like you’re nothing. And I know she’s already done it to you, so you can’t fucking deny it.”

No response comes from Penny. She scowls at the ground and opens her mouth to speak, but no words leave her mouth. So Noel continues, his tone softer. “Look, I used to be friends with her, so this isn’t just coming from nowhere. Penny, I know you really care about her, but there’s a reason everyone she meets ends up hating her.”

Again, no response comes. Deciding to leave the topic be, Noel puts on a smile and places a hand on Penny’s shoulder. “Come on. This mall may be really shitty, but the food court has amazing milkshakes. Wanna get one?”

Penny looks up at him and nods, so Noel leads her off to the food court.

Penny walks the halls, keeping an eye out for Noel or Constance. She doesn’t spot either of them, but she does see Ocean. Penny starts to walk toward her, but stops herself.

She doesn’t want to see me.

Or talk to me.

Still, as she passes Ocean she flashes her a smile. Ocean glares at her in return, so Penny just hurries out of the building and toward her usual tree.

Penny pulls herself up onto the branches of the tree, glancing up at the sky as she waits for Noel and Constance to arrive.

It doesn’t take too long. Saint Cassian isn’t the biggest school, after all.

“Hey,” Noel greets, avoiding the muddy bits in the grass.

“Hi,” Penny replies, shifting so her legs dangle over the edge of the branch. Constance murmurs a quiet greeting, too occupied with writing something in a sketchbook to actually chat.

“I take it you didn’t enjoy the movie over the weekend?” Noel questions, drawing Penny’s attention back to him.

“Huh? Oh, no, not really,” Penny replies, shrugging. ‘Not really’ is kind of an understatement. The movie was mind numbingly boring.

“You two watched a movie?” Constance pipes up, finally putting the sketchbook away.

“Yeah. Penny found out I worked at Taco Bell, and we watched a werewolf movie. What was it called again?”

“You mean the new one in the Cinema? I don’t know. Wolverine, maybe?”

Noel shakes his head. “Nah. That’s a superhero from comics. Mischa says there’s gonna be a movie for him released in April.”

“Really? Mischa likes superhero movies?”

“Only the edgy ones.”

Penny listens to the two talk, glad they’re getting along. She only joins in if she has something of value to share, mainly just witnessing the conversation evolve from Mischa to movies to the cinema to the town itself, to the forest surrounding Uranium City and what kinds of trees are in it.

She likes this tree. People usually don’t get too close to it, so it’s peaceful. And she has a good view of everyone. There are some freshmen running around playing football, and Ocean is sitting on the front steps of the school. The sight of her makes Penny’s heart ache. She looks so tired. 

Penny keeps her gaze fixed on Ocean for a while, examining her from afar. It hurts to see her, yet she doesn’t want to look away.

Still keeping her gaze fixed on Ocean, her mind begins to wander.

For a long time.

And then she’s rudely interrupted by an ear-piercing shriek, followed by one of the sophomores running out of the school building. “GRASSHOPPERS!” she screams, rushing up to a teacher.

Noel and Constance exchange glances.

“What’s going on?” Noel asks, making a face.

“Something to do with grasshoppers?”

“I figured.”

“Maybe it’s an infestation.”

Noel shudders. “Gross.”

Penny gasps in mock-offense. “Grasshoppers are not gross! They’re cool! They breathe through little organs on the sides of their body!”

“Like I said. Gross.”

The three stroll down the sidewalk, when a stray grasshopper bounces in front of them.

“Ew,” Noel grumbles, backing away from the bug. “Must have come from the school.”

“No.” Penny’s already crouching down and trying to pick it up. “They’re not that fast. At least, I don’t think so.”

Noel steps back, mildly disgusted at the fact that Penny’s holding it in her hands. “Ugh. Keep that abomination away from me.”

Constance, who had been trailing behind them for the majority of the walk, steps forward and opens the door to the Blackwood Café.

“Seriously, though,” Penny giggles. “Out of all the reasons for school to end early, a grasshopper infestation wasn’t even on the list.”

Noel nods in agreement, following Constance into the café. It’s a lot warmer inside. And it smells like really, really strong coffee. “It’s just so weird. Do grasshopper infestations even happen?”

“Yeah, they do,” Penny answers. “It usually happens outside in gardens, though.”

“Maybe it was a prank,” Constance pipes up.

Noel shrugs, choosing a table to sit at and watching the other two follow him. “Maybe. Either way, it’s definitely one of the more interesting school days here.”

“What about that time the basketballs were replaced with balloons?”

“Touché.”

Noel glances at Penny, who is looking between the two seeming utterly lost.

“Right. A few years ago someone replaced all the basketballs in the gym with balloons. The coach was pissed.”

Penny hums, appearing to be a bit less confused. “Really? Who did it?”

“They never found out,” Noel replies with a grin.

After that, the three return to their usual chatter.