Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Abnegation transfers were rare in Amity. My mother had been one of the few who had decided to leave Abnegation. She had exchanged all the gray and selflessness for colorful loving people. I had grown up with few rules, running through fields barefoot and climbing every tree in sight. Amity had a reputation for being too open with affection and love. My long brown waves hung free behind me, growing with me until I decided to trim them. My skin had tanned with exposure to the sun. Amity were almost as physically strong as the Dauntless, farming the food for the entirety of Chicago didn’t leave us much of a choice. 

My family consisted of my Amity father, my former Abnegation mother, and my father’s parents. My grandmother had been Erudite, my grandfather had been Dauntless, always distrustful of the peace that the city lived with. He had raised my father to fight the way the Dauntless did, and insisted that my father teach me as well. I had excelled at hand to hand combat, fighting my father in empty fields any chance we got. I had learned how to throw knives with ease, but had never had the chance to handle a gun. I was fast on my feet, lighter than my father and a concerning lust for blood when I lost myself in the fight. Over the years I had been disciplined more than once at school and at home for fighting other kids. I had a strong sense of justice, something that I had gotten from one of my family members who had been Candor. My mother had taught me how to be selfless, sharing her upbringing with me in the moments that it would benefit me the most.

By the time the Choosing Ceremony rolled around I had grown into a beautiful young woman and my mother wouldn’t let me forget it. She had trimmed my messy brown waves and styled some long face framing bangs. My bright green eyes matched her own, the freckles across my face a gift from my grandmother and her curse of being barely over five feet. The only things I got from my father were full pink lips and his brown hair. 

My mother had laid out a deep red dress, a belt around the waist and some easy to run in boots. Around my wrist she had tied a bracelet, each braided string a different color for each member of my family. Blue for grandma, gray for mom, yellow for dad, and red for grandpa. There was a black string tied in as well, for the uncle that had left for Dauntless the year before my mother and father had chosen Amity. Grandpa had refused to talk about him my entire life, I had only found out when dad had been teaching me to fight and grandpa had remarked how much my form had reflected his first born. 

The testing had been wild, and I had been pleased to be one of the last to go, able to leave right after.  I had been handed a glass of what I had wanted to assume was water but I knew better. 

“Drink this.” I was instructed. 

I downed the liquid without a second thought. I blinked and I was standing in the empty cafeteria, before me on a table stood a hunk of cheese and a long knife. 

“Choose.” a voice prompted me.

“Why?” I asked the disembodied voice.

“Choose.” 

I hesitated. 

“Choose!” The voice screamed.

“No!” I yelled back.

I had never been good at being told what to do without an explanation as to why I was being told to. 

The cheese and knife disappeared. Behind me the sound of a door opening caused me to turn, before me was a dog. It growled at me, its hackles raised and teeth bared. I wasn’t afraid, I had never been afraid of dogs. I stood my ground, letting the dog approach me as I stood totally still. I took a deep breath when the dog moved away from me, but a little girl's voice caught its attention instead. With no warning the dog raced towards the little girl. I threw myself at the dog. I hit the ground hard but the world around me had gone silent. 

I rubbed my shoulder as I opened my eyes again, the testing room stood before me and I knew the test wasn’t over yet. I opened the door to find a crowded bus, no seats were available and I moved out of the way towards the back of the bus. The man sitting nearest me was reading a paper. The headline read ‘Brutal Murderer Apprehended.’ I watched as the man’s burnt hands moved towards the headline and tapped it. 

“Do you know this man?” He asked. 

My gaze drifted down to the picture below and although I knew I had never seen the man before in my life something triggered a feeling of recognition. 

“I’m sorry I can’t get a good look at the picture.” I said slowly, trying to keep my composure. 

The man stood suddenly thrusting the paper in my face. 

“Do you know this man? Do you?” He screamed.

“Why do you care?” I demanded.

“You could save me!” He shouted.

“I can’t help you!” I whispered. 

The floor opened at my feet and swallowed me whole.

I jolted up in the chair, chest heaving. I was in the testing room again. Electrodes attached to my head. 

The woman administering the test began silently removing the electrodes from both our heads moving extra slow. I watched her in the mirrors as she put everything away. 

“The results were wrong, weren’t they?” I asked. 

Her eyes met my eyes in the mirror. 

“The test is designed to eliminate each faction until only one is left, the one you belong to. However your test didn’t do that. I couldn’t make any inferences based on your refusal to choose in the beginning of the test, when you threw yourself at the dog it triggered a Dauntless result as well and an Abnegation one. So I had you go through the bus simulation, but that too was confusing, you refused to admit the truth to the man which means you aren’t Candor but the shame you felt triggered the Candor response as well as an abnegation one I thought I could rule out Erudite safely but something else you did or felt triggered that one as well.” 

She sighed. 

“The test showed an affinity for all of the factions. There’s a name for people who test into more than one faction but this is a result you can never share with anyone ever, even after the tests.” She looked me over and then took a deep breath.  “It’s called Divergent.”

I nodded my head slowly. 

“You don’t seem worried.” She scrunched her face up in confusion. 

“I was raised to be all of the best things a faction could offer. I’m not surprised.”

“Do you have an idea of where you want to go?”

I nodded.

“Where?”

“Dauntless.”

“It won't be safe for you there.”

“It’s not safe for me anywhere else. I can lie and hide the other parts of me.”

“Then I’ll manually enter Dauntless.”

I had left the room and made my way home. My mother had pulled me close, holding me for as long as I would let her. I had watched the sunset from the top of the tallest tree that I could climb. 

The red dress moved with the swaying of my body as I stood with the other sixteen year olds. I waited for my last name to be called. I watched as the names were called, as kids returned to their faction of origin until James Tucker from Dauntless let his blood fall onto the glass of Candor. The sound of muted mumbles fills the space from the Dauntless. I watched in shock as an Abnegation boy continued the trend, letting his blood fall into the Erudite water instead of the gray Abnegation stones. Marcus had to yell as outrage filled the room. The girl after him, his sister it looked like, let drops of her blood fall on the carpet between the Dauntless and Abnegation bowls before the sizzle of liquid on flame sounded as she chose Dauntless. The room erupted into chaos but quieted quickly as we continued. I was one of the last, twisting my new bracelet on my wrist until it was my turn. I wasted no time letting my blood fall onto the flames of Dauntless. I moved to the awaiting group as they cheered loudly. I stood next to the Abnegation girl, she was shorter than me but both of us were towered over by several of the other transfers. When the sea of black started to shuffle towards the door I left the speck of gray behind. I was fast and I had no issue keeping up with the Dauntless. I tucked the edge of my dress into the belt around my waist to allow better movement. To run if I needed to.  

I followed the Dauntless as we thundered down the stairs, the whooping shouts and laughter ringing through the stairwell. I moved through the bodies quickly, people jostling each other as the girl in the red dress passed them. The Dauntless kept their hair tied up or short, my long hair was getting in my face as a breeze rushed up to meet us from the ground floor. I slowed to a jog to pull a hair tie from my wrist and pull half my hair up to keep it out of my face.  I raced the other initiates to the posts that held the train tracks and joined them in the climb up. I could hear the train horn and I watched in awe as it started to fly past with the doors wide open, ready and waiting for us. I watched as the Dauntless began to throw themselves onto the cars, and joined a group of Dauntless born grasping the handle and pulling myself into the open door. 

There was a pause as the other people in the car took me in. 

“Well would you look at that.” someone muttered. 

“What?” I asked, tilting my head to the side. 

“We don’t get a lot of Amity transfers.” Someone in the back said.

“The whole anti violence thing right? Well surprise.” I smiled at them. 

“Well I’m glad it’s one of the pretty ones.” A dark skinned boy grinned at me. His hair was cropped, smile wide and friendly, and handsome.

“Uriah!” One of the girls next to him elbowed him hard in the side. 

“What! I’m just saying! She is gorgeous.” 

“I’m sorry about this idiot.” The taller of the two dark haired girls held out her hand to me.  “I’m Marlene and this is the third member of our trio Lynn.” She gestured to the shorter girl. 

“Nice to meet you. I’m Monroe.”

“That’s definitely an Amity name if I ever heard one.” Uriah grinned again. 

“Let her enjoy her first train ride, it’s almost over anyway.” Lynn elbowed him again. 

I shifted back towards the door and took in the way the city sped past under our feet. I had loved being high in the sky back in Amity. Climbing the trees to get the best fruit from the very top. The wind pulled at my hair, whipping it around as a giddy laugh left my lips. I watched as black clad members began to jump to a rooftop across from the train tracks. 

I grinned.

“You ready?” Marlene asked as she pulled me back to get a running start.

“Always.” I grinned at her. 

We jumped together, I tucked my body so that I would roll to a stop instead of skidding as I felt the rocks of the rooftop under my feet. I was back on my feet without a scrape as the others began to gather in groups. More and more bodies joined us as other initiates hit the rooftop, many of them falling on the gravel or struggling to pull themselves into the roof. 

Standing by the edge, on the side next to where we had landed, were two men. One was older with dark skin and gray hair around his temples. The other was a taller blonde with cold eyes, piercings adorned his face above his left eyebrow and his ears. On his neck were tattoos that followed a geometric pattern but disappeared into his shirt. His eyes found me, the single red dress in a group of black. I let my eyes roam his face, his piercing blue eyes doing the same. I smiled softly as I watched awe pass over his face before it slammed back down into a cold mask. I raised an eyebrow at him in a challenge. I was very good at reading people’s body language but he ignored me in favor of watching the last initiate's arrival. The train passed by the rooftop, a sob broke through the quiet murmurs and I watched as the Abnegation girl checked the edge, the look on her face told me everything, someone hadn’t made it onto the roof. 

“Oh scandalous, a Stiff’s flashing skin.” A tall dark haired boy with beautiful green eyes and a nice smile called as the girl stopped checking the scrap on her elbow. 

“Listen up! My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction!” The older dark skinned man shouted. “Several stories below us is the members entrance to our compound. If you can’t muster the will to jump off, you don’t belong here. Our initiates have the privilege of going first.” He gestured to the edge behind him. 

The tension in the group was palpable. 

“You want us to jump off a ledge?” The question came from an Erudite girl with mousy brown hair and large lips, taller than me but barely. 

“Yes.” Came Max’s amused answer. 

“Is there water at the bottom or something?” 

“Who knows?” He raised his eyebrows. 

I couldn’t stop the smile that lifted the corner of my mouth. He was toying with us. The Dauntless members on the roof split to make a path for the initiates. No one wanted to go first, but my body was already dragging me to the blue eyed man standing on the edge. The Abnegation girl followed me. Someone snickered behind us, but I raised my hand to the blue eyed man, asking for assistance to climb up. My left foot was already placed on the edge. He raised an eyebrow at me but took my hand nonetheless, letting me use his strong arm to push myself the rest of the way up without flashing everyone. I looked over the ledge into the big empty square that the buildings around us formed as the wind whipped around us. 

“Whenever you’re ready.” The man who was still holding my hand said. 

“I was born ready.” I smiled at him. 

His cold mask fell again as I let go of his hand and fell backwards off the roof. The wind howled as the ground grew closer but there was no fear in me. When the hole rushed up to meet me I was met with darkness but still no fear. Then I hit something hard that gave way and sort of cradled me, something filled with holes. A net. A few hands reached out to me and I grabbed the largest one, the closest. It was attached to a man who helped pull me across. When I reached the edge of the net it was pulled down enough for me to clumsily manage to get my feet on the ground and brace myself on the large handed man's chest. It was then that I got a good look at him, kissable lips, deep set dark blue eyes with a lighter patch near the iris in one of them surrounded by thick dark eyelashes. Beyond him was a wide open Carven filled with Dauntless members. 

“What’s your name?” His voice was like warm honey despite his tone being cold.

“Monroe.”

“Think hard about it, you can change it but once I announce it that will be your name.” 

I paused. 

“Roe.”

“First Jumper, Roe.” He announced and the Dauntless members went wild around me as I descended the platform. 

“Welcome to Dauntless.” He said as he let my hand slip from his.

I stood quietly as the others jumped, no name besides my own were announced. I had been the first and that made all the difference in Dauntless. The initiates gathered around me, the Abnegation girl had stuck her hand out to me when she had landed and introduced herself as Tris. I had shaken her hand but when I touched her something in the back of my mind told me to let go quickly. I smiled in her face as she had brought over a Candor girl with short brown hair and skin that was close to Uriah’s and introduced her as Christina. Uriah, Lynn, and Marlene had swarmed around me when they had landed, grinning and calling me one of them. I laughed along with them as Uriah hugged me close. Tris stood off to the side with Christina watching us, her eyes flashed with jealousy but she tried hard to cover it up. 

The man who had helped me off the net  and another Dauntless member led us down a narrow tunnel. The walls were stone paired with sloped ceilings giving the illusion of being deep underground. The tunnel was lit but there were long intervals between the lights. In the dark Everyone seemed to keep bumping into each other. I had run my fingers along the wall and stayed off to the side, allowing myself space so that I wasn’t walking into anyone. My steps were small and calculated. We came to an abrupt halt, Tris walked into the Erudite boy in front of her, I let out a small laugh as everyone else did the same. Uriah barely managed to avoid walking into my shoulder. 

“This is where we divide. Dauntless born initiates are with me, I assume you don't need a tour of the place.” The Dauntless member called. 

Uriah, Lynn, and Marlene waved goodbye as they turned down a different path. When they left the group seemed much smaller and I took a moment to count us. There were ten transfers, most of whom were Erudite and Candor. Tris was the only Abnegation and I was the lone Amity. Once he was sure the Dauntless born were gone, the man addressed us. 

“Most of the time I work in the control room, but for the next few weeks, I’m your instructor. My name is Four.”

“Four like the number?” Christina snorted out. 

“Yes. Is there a problem?” He gave her a hard look. 

“No.”

“Good, we’re about to head into the Pit which you will someday learn to love. It-” the sound of Christina snickering cut him off. 

“The Pit? Clever name.” 

While she was busy laughing the rest of us watched as Four got close to her, lowered his head to hers getting very close and stared at her hard. 

“What’s your name?” His voice was quiet but something about it had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. 

“Christina.”

“Well Christina, if I wanted to put up with Candor smart mouths I would have joined their faction. The first lesson you will learn from me is to keep your mouth shut. Got it?” He hissed. 

She nodded. 

He moved away from her and as he moved down the tunnel away from us we all followed him in silence. Four was putting on a show for us. I could see the way he watched me as I moved through the group and around the space, he was curious. We followed him through double doors and into the Pit. It was an underground cavern that stretched so wide it was impossible to see the other side from where we stood. Built into the walls were stores going all the way up, there were no guardrails to keep people from falling off one of the built in walkways. Above us glass tiles let in sunlight and blue lanterns dangled in randomly spaced intervals to offer light at night. All around us were people moving in a sea of black and red, loud and expressive and something about it felt so welcoming. 

“If you’ll follow me I’ll show you the Chasm.” Four had to raise his voice to grab our attention over the rest of the noise. 

With the new light I managed to see the edges of a tattoo on the back of his neck as he led us to the right side of the Pit, into darkness. We shuffled forward carefully and were just able to make out the iron barrier in front of us as the sound of rushing water dominated our senses. 

It was a waterfall. 

“The Chasm reminds us that there is a fine line between idiocy and bravery. A daredevil jump off this ledge will end your life. It has happened before and it will happen again. You’ve been warned.” Four shouted. 

I lingered at the edge of the guardrail, to have a little part of home here was comforting. I followed the last person out to a large hole in the wall of the Pit, beyond it was a dining hall that was well lit. As we entered, the Dauntless inside began to stand stomping their feet, clapping their hands, banging cups, anything to make noise. A grin broke out on my face at the welcome we were getting. It felt nice to be welcomed, wanted. 

Four left us to our own devices. Tris grabbed my hand and tugged me after her and Christina. We sat at a mostly empty table where I ended up across from Four while Tris and Christina sat next to him. In front of us were hamburgers, I took one and placed it on my plate leaving it untouched. Instead I began to look around the room, trying to see if Uriah was around. A  kick under the table drew my attention back to where Four was staring at me.

“It’s beef. Put this on it.” He passed a small bowl of something red to Tris. 

Tris followed his orders. He was talking to her but staring at me.

“You’ve never had a hamburger before?” Christina gasped. 

“No, is that what it’s called?” Tris asked. 

“Stiffs eat plain foods.” Four offered as an explanation but something about the way he spit out the word made me wonder if he had once been one. 

“Why?” Christina asked. 

“Extravagance is considered self indulgent.” Tris explained.

“Therefore it’s unnecessary.” I parroted the words my mother had told me. 

“No wonder you left.” Christina grinned at Tris, who was looking at me funny. 

“Yea it was just because of the food.” Tris rolled her eyes. 

Four let the corner of his mouth twitch as if he was going to smile after the confusion on his face had passed. His smile stopped when the doors swung open and everything became muted. I watched as the same man with the cold eyes stood in the center of the room, his gaze sweeping over the room until he found who he was looking for and he began making his way towards us. 

“Who’s that?” Christina asked. 

“His name is Eric, he’s a Dauntless leader.” Four answered.   

“Seriously? but he’s so young!”

“Age doesn’t matter around here.” 

Christina looked ready to ask another question but stopped when Eric dropped into the seat next to me, across from Four. He kept his gaze on Four only giving a slight glance towards Tris and Christina. 

“Well, aren’t you going to introduce me?”  He asked Four. 

“This is Tris, Christina, and Roe.”

“A Stiff and a Hippie.” He smirked at Tris before meeting my eyes.

He was trying to bait us into defending our old faction, to show weakness. I tilted my head and matched the cold stare he was giving me.

“I was the first jumper.” I smiled sweetly at him.

“You were, we’ll see if you’re really that fearless.” He smirked at me, turning his body to face me more. 

“Don’t worry handsome, you don’t scare me.” I kept the smile on my face. 

“I should.” Eric growled at me. 

Four cleared his throat, forcing Eric to shift his attention back to his original target.

“What have you been up to lately, Four?” He asked, drumming his fingers on the table. 

“Nothing really.”

“Max tells me he keeps trying to meet with you and you don’t show up. He requested that I find out what’s going on.”

“Tell him I’m satisfied with the position I currently hold.” Four gave Eric a hard look.

“So he wants to give you a job.”

“So it would seem.”

“And you’re not interested.”

“I haven’t been interested for two years.”

“Well let’s hope he gets the point then.” Eric said as he clapped Four on the shoulder intentionally hard across the table and got up. 

He turned to face me. 

“I hope you’re as tough as you think you are gorgeous, I’d love to have you around.” he smirked as Four’s eyes darkened. 

“Are you two friends?” Tris asked after Eric was out of earshot. 

“We were in the same initiate class. He transferred from Erudite.” Four answered. 

It made sense, Eric seemed like someone who knew more than he let on. Someone who had the bigger picture in mind. 

“Were you a transfer too?” 

“I thought I would only have trouble with the Candor asking too many questions. Now I’ve got the Stiff too?” He said coldly. 

“It must be because you’re so approachable. Like a bed of nails.” Tris quipped.  

“Careful Tris.” Four warned. He turned to me. “Roe, stay away from Eric.”

Someone calling his name dragged his attention away from us and away from the table. Once he was gone Christina caught our attention with her raised brows.

“What?” Tris asked. 

“I’m developing a theory.”

“Which is?” I asked. 

“That you both have a death wish.” She grinned at us. 

When dinner ended Eric took over Four’s job of showing us around. He led us down a series of hallways, ignoring any questions directed his way about where we were going. Finally Eric stopped in front of a wooden door and folded his arms as he waited for everyone to catch up. 

“For those of you that don’t know my name is Eric. I’m one of the five Dauntless leaders. We take initiation very seriously around here so I volunteered to oversee most of your training. Ground rules, training is at eight o’clock every morning. Training takes place from eight to six everyday with a break for lunch. After six you’re free to do whatever you want, between each stage of initiation you will also get time off. You are only permitted to leave the compound when accompanied by a Dauntless member. Behind this door,” He gestured to the wooden door. “Is where you will be sleeping for the next few weeks. You may notice that there are eleven beds and only ten of you. We anticipated a higher number of you would make it this far.”

“But we started with fourteen.” Christina stated. 

I caught Tris fliching, Christina needed to learn when to keep her mouth shut. 

“There is always at least one transfer that doesn’t make it into the compound.” Eric answered as he picked at his cuticles in disinterest. “Anyway, in the first stage of initiation we keep the transfers and Dauntless born separate, that does not mean that you are evaluated separately. At the end of initiation your rankings will be determined in comparison to the Dauntless born. They’re better than you already so I expect-”

“Rankings?” The Erudite girl asked. “Why are we ranked?” 

Eric’s smile was wicked, in a way that would most definitely be described as cruel if it wasn’t for the fact that he was annoyingly attractive.

“Your ranking serves two purposes. The first is to determine the order in which you will select jobs after initiation. There are only a few desirable positions left. The second is that only the top ten are made into members.” My stomach dropped, I knew that people got dropped if they couldn’t pass initiation but competing against each other seemed cruel. 

“Shit.” I muttered. 

“There are eleven Dauntless born and ten of you. Five initiates will be cut by the end of stage one. The remainder will be cut after the final test.” 

I could see the wheels turning in everyone’s mind, seven of us would not make it at the end of the day. Tris’s odds were not good, she was small and from Abnegation, I was Amity and also short. I was going to be a harder opponent given my strength but that was all they knew that I had on my side. 

“What do we do if we’re cut?” The pretty eyed Candor boy asked. 

“You leave the compound and live factionless.” Eric said with indifference. 

The mousy Erudite girl began to sob, she was not cut out for Dauntless and it was becoming increasingly obvious. 

“But that’s not fair. If we had known-” Eric cut off the broad shouldered Candor girl. 

“Are you saying that if you had known at the ceremony that you would have chosen differently? Because if that’s the case you should get out now. If you’re really one of us it won’t matter to you if you might fail. If it does then you are a coward.” He pushed open the wooden door. “You chose us. Now we have to choose you.” 

Eric left us to change into the clothes that have been provided for us, everyone did but Tris. She quickly climbed into bed in her Abnegation clothes. Part of me pitied her, she was not like the rest of us. She had been raised to keep her body hidden.

 Once the lights went out it was quiet besides the sound of breathing. Every now and again I could hear someone toss and turn in an attempt to get comfortable. The space was new, and it was dark without windows to let the moon light seep through but I forced my mind to quiet down and rest. 

I was up with the sun, or what I assumed would have been the sun, a habit that I would struggle to get rid of. I quickly pulled pants over the underwear I had slept in. I shifted quietly into one of the bathroom stalls and changed into a clean pair before I pulled my waves into a ponytail. I retraced my steps from last night to find the cafeteria in search of  some breakfast. I was surprised to find it mostly empty. 

Eric and Four were sitting on opposite sides of the space but both raised an eyebrow at my arrival. I grabbed a muffin and some water before sitting down to eat. Slowly more people began to trickle in and I waited until the rest of my group joined the table I had claimed. When everyone was finished we were led from the room, by Four, to a training room filled with targets. I wasn’t surprised that they would have us hit the ground running but it was obvious that some of the others were struggling with the idea. 

“The first thing you will learn today is how to shoot a gun. The second is how to fight.” 

Four pressed a gun into Tris’s hands and then into my own. 

“Thankfully if you’re here you already know how to get on and off a moving train, so I don’t need to teach you that.” 

“Initiation is divided into three stages, we will measure your progress and rank you according to your performance in each stage. The stages are not weighted equally in determining your final rank so it is possible but incredibly hard to dramatically improve your rank over time.” Four lectured us. 

“We believe that preparation eradicates cowardice which we define as the failure to act in the midst of fear. Therefore each stage of initiation is intended to prepare you in a different way. The first stage is mostly physical, the second emotional, and the third mentally.”

“But what-” A yawn cut off the green eyed Candor’s words “What does firing a gun have to do with bravery?”

 Four wasted no time as he flipped the gun in his hand and rested the barrel against the boy's forehead. We could all hear a bullet click into the chamber. The boy froze.

 “Wake. Up. You’re holding a loaded gun idiot, act like it.” Four snapped. 

Once he had lowered the gun I watched a hard look cross the boy's face, like he was trying to keep his mouth closed. 

“To answer your question, you are far less likely to soil yourself and cry for your mother if you’re prepared to defend yourself.” Four stopped at the end of the row and turned on his heel. “This is information you might need later in stage one so watch me.” 

He faced the targets, which was nothing more than a square of plywood with three red circles painted on them, and fired. His aim was good, his bullet went through the middle circle. I wasted no time facing my own target and firing, I aimed for the outer circles first, letting my body get used to the weight of a gun and the kick back. I had never handled a gun before but grandpa had taught me how to stand and did his best to mimic the recoil that different sized guns had.

Four made the rounds to observe us, taking interest in how badly Tris was doing and how well others were doing. I paid him no mind until he stopped by me, he shifted to stand behind me and pressed his chest to my back. He kicked my legs a little wider apart and rested his hand on my stomach. He was correcting my stance, I shifted with his adjustments and aimed again. I hit the target dead center in rapid succession.  

“Someone taught you how to hold a gun.” He breathed in my ear “Don’t pretend to be weak. This is survival of the fittest and the brave, don’t hide what you’re good at.” 

He moved away from me. I kept hitting the target dead center until Four called for us to stop for lunch. I followed Christina as she invited Al, the tall lumbering boy who slept next to Tris, to join us. Tris’s dislike of Al was obvious to me in the way she blatantly ignored him. She was judgmental and it rubbed me the wrong way. I had tuned out of their conversation, more entertained by the way the room moved around us with people. The Erudite boy that placed his tray down in front of me forced my attention back to the three other initiates. 

“Do you mind if I sit here?” He asked, I vaguely remembered his name, Will. 

“You don’t want to sit with your Erudite buddies?” Christina asked. 

“They aren’t my buddies, just because we came from the same faction doesn’t make us friends. Besides, Edward and Myra are dating.” He said as he took a seat across from me. 

Tris flinched away from their shared kiss and immediately showed her true colors.

“Do they have to be so public about it?” She asked. 

I rolled my eyes. Abnegation was known for being prudish. 

“He only kissed her, it’s not like they’re getting naked.” Al said.

“Kissing is meant to be done in private.”  She insisted. 

I snorted while the others gave her knowing looks. 

“What?!” She exclaimed. 

“Your Abnegation is showing.” Christina teased. “I’m not surprised that Roe didn’t bat an eye though. You know how Amity is.”

“Don’t start with me. I was raised to be careful with my affections. I’ve only kissed one guy before.” I wagged my finger in Christina’s face. 

“I guess I’ll have to get over it.” Tris mumbled.

“Or you can stay frigid.” Will teased. 

“Don’t be mean to her.” Christina rolled her eyes at him. “Frigidity is in her nature, just like being a know it all is in yours.” 

“I’m not frigid!” Tris shouted. 

“It’s endearing, look you’re all red.” Will pointed out. 

Tris was in fact flush from embarrassment as we all began to laugh, at first hers was forced but finally she joined us in a real laugh for the first time since I met her. When lunch was over Four led us to a new room. It was huge with punching bags hanging along three foot intervals on one side while in the middle sat a large painted circle. On the wall to the left hung a chalkboard, with our names in alphabetical order. We followed after Four as he led us to the punching bags, each of us stood behind one as he stood in the middle. 

“As I said this morning, You will learn to fight in order to prepare yourself to act, so that your body will be ready to react to threats and challenges. You will need to learn how to do that if you intend to survive Dauntless.” He paused and his eyes met mine for a moment. “Today we will go over technique, tomorrow you will start fighting each other. I recommend you pay attention. Those who don’t learn fast get hurt.” 

He showed off some punches and kicks, giving names to moves I had seen my grandpa use against my dad. I paid him no mind as I hit the bag hard enough for it to swing. When I paused to catch my breath I realized that I was the only one who had made the bag swing effectively, everyone else was struggling and those that had managed to make it move were riding on pure strength and no real technique. The others were completely worn out and I took the time to stretch my body the way grandpa had forced me to do before he let me go. Everyone else was slow to trickle out the group that had adopted me waiting by the door as I jogged to catch up. 

“I want to get a tattoo.” Al announced once we had entered the Pit. 

“A tattoo of what?” Will asked. 

“I don’t know, I just want to feel like I’ve left my old faction. Stop crying about it.” There was a pause. “I know you’ve heard me.” 

“Yea, learn to quiet down will ya?” Christina teased him before turning to face Tris and I. “I think you’re right though, we’re half in and half out right now. If we want all the way in we should look the part.”

“No, I will not cut my hair or dye it a strange color or pierce my face.” Tris said in response to Christina’s look. 

“I’m not against changing it up a bit. Definitely need new clothes.” I smiled. 

“Well us girls will get new clothes and meet the boys at the tattoo parlor.” Christina decided and we all went our separate ways. 

Christina dragged us into the first store she saw and began immediately throwing clothes at Tris to try on.nI browsed the clothes, pulling out a few tank tops and tight black pants, both jean material and other types. Everything that fit and hugged my curves right I piled up to take with me. I pulled on a pair of tight black jeans, some lightly loved boots, and a cropped black top under a leather jacket that I couldn’t keep my hands off. When I stepped out Christina was standing in front of a mirror with Tris. 

“See? You’re striking.” Christina told Tris as she stared at herself in the mirror, her eyes lined with black. “You like it?” 

“I look like a different person.” Tris nodded. 

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Christina asked as she approached me with a black pencil. 

I took it from her and lined my green eyes, loving the way they popped. 

“A good thing.” She turned to face us. “Sorry I’ve just never been allowed to stare at my reflection for this long.” 

“Really?” Christina asked. “Abnegation is a strange faction I have to tell you.” 

“Let’s go watch Al get tattooed.” Tris was quick to redirect the conversation. 

We raced down the narrow path to the tattoo shop, bags of clothes swinging in our hands. When we got there Al was already sitting in a chair while a man with more ink than skin drew a spider on his arm. Christina wasted no time settling into the empty spot next to Will, joining him flipping through books of pictures. Tris and I wandered the store, taking in the art on the walls around us. A picture of a hawk caused Tris to stop and I along with her. 

“It’s a raven, pretty right?” a voice behind us caught our attention. 

We turned to find the woman who had done my test standing behind us. 

“Well hello again, never thought I’d see you both again. Beatrice and Monroe right? I’m Tori.”

“Actually it’s Tris and Roe now.” Tris corrected her. “Do you work here?”

“I do. I just took a break to administer the tests. Most of the time I’m here. Roe, you were the first jumper right?”

“Yep, that’s me!” I smiled at her. 

“Well done.”

“Thanks.” 

“Listen, I wanted to talk to you about something.” Tris said.

“I’m not sure that would be wise. I helped you as much as I could, and now you will have to go it alone” Tori whispered.

“Want a tattoo?” Tori asked. 

Tris picked up the picture of the raven.

“Yes, three of these flying birds.” She said as she pointed to her collar bone.

When Tris was done I laid in Tori’s chair exposed from my hip to my rib cage. She inked a design of flowers, vines, and leaves into my skin, starting on my thigh below my butt cheek and ending under my breast. She had covered everything else with well placed blankets which I was grateful for when Eric stepped into the shop,  his gaze hungry as he took in my exposed skin. He smirked at me as he took a seat to watch Tori work. Tori hadn’t noticed him behind her and so I kept my mouth shut. I refused to let him know his gaze was affecting me, I didn’t stiffen under Tori’s hand and I didn’t fidget. Eric left before I was done, but I wasn’t surprised to find him standing in the tunnel that led back to the dorm.

“Quite a piece you got there gorgeous.” He smirked at me. 

“Well I plan on placing in the top five. Call it an early celebration.” 

I tried to scoot past him but he threw out an arm to stop me. I tipped my head back to meet his hard gaze. 

“You should have Tori pull the privacy curtain next time.”

“Why?”

“Anyone could have walked in and seen you like that.”

“Why do you care?”

He leaned in next to my ear, the mint on his breath filling my nose as his breath fanned across my skin.

“Because that view should be for me alone.” 

I raised an eyebrow at him.

“You don’t own me.” I whispered as I moved to meet his eyes, my lips brushing his lightly. 

“Oh but I will.” He whispered against my lips before kissing me hard. 

I gasped at the sudden contact. He took advantage, pushing me against the wall while he deepened the kiss. I grasped his shirt and bunched it up in my hands as I pulled him closer. He might have been a stranger but the way his lips moved against mine and his hands explored my body made it easy to forget that this man had known me for all of one day. I smirked to myself at the idea that I had made that much of an impression on him. Finally he pulled away, both of us panting but neither moving too far. Our chests were still pressed together. 

“This has to be a secret.” His voice was softer as if he was ready for me to freak out. 

“Casual. Got it.” I let go of his shirt. 

“No, you’re an initiate, I’m a leader. I don’t have favorites. I don’t do soft spots.” 

“You barely know me. I’m not expecting anything from you. Don’t worry.” I smiled. 

I could see the irritation on his face, he wanted me to take him more seriously. He wanted me to want him more than I did. 

“I have to get to bed before curfew. Night handsome.” I waved my figures at him as I finally moved down the tunnel towards my bed. 

I slipped into my bed right before curfew, thankful that Eric hadn’t made me late. I closed my eyes, the thought of his frustration making my dreams all the more sweet.

Chapter Text

I woke with the sun again. A habit that I wasn’t so sure was going to harm me in the long run. I braided my hair back from my face and headed to breakfast after getting dressed. I was surprised to see Eric but not Four. Eric was chatting with a girl, a pretty blonde who was basically sitting in his lap. I rolled my eyes when his gaze met mine, one kiss wasn’t enough to make me want to fight over a man. I grabbed a muffin and some water and sat close to the door. I didn’t want to have to look at Eric and I was tempted to head back to the training room. When I was finished I followed through with the idea of extra training. I flipped Eric off as I left, the scoff that he let out could be heard by the entire room. 

Four was throwing punches at a bag when I entered. His eyebrow raised when he saw me but otherwise he watched silently as I stretched and chose a bag a few down from where he was. I knew I needed to get stronger in order to best some of the guys in the initiation group. I wanted to be on top, not because I wanted to be the best but because I needed a job that would keep me safe. Something that wouldn’t give away the way my family had decided to raise me. I could feel Four’s eyes on me as my bag swung with the force of my punches.

“Doesn’t seem like you need much help.” Four said softly from behind me. 

“I learn fast.” 

“Don’t lie to me Amity.” 

“Or what?” I challenged. 

“Or I’ll have to push you until you’re begging to stop.” Four’s eyes flicked to my lips and back to my eyes. 

“I’d love to see you try.” 

I turned back to my punching bag but Four tugged on my braid and I let my body move with the force, not enough to make me fall into him but enough that my steps faltered. I reached behind me and grabbed his wrist, I shuffled my body so I was under him and threw him over my shoulder. I ended up on my knees straddling his face, he hadn’t let go of my hair like I had hoped. 

“I knew it.” He smirked to himself. 

“What?”

“You’re Dauntless. Someone taught you how to defend yourself.”

“My old faction is none of your business.” I hissed down at him. 

“Maybe not, but this just got a lot more interesting.”

He released his grip on my braid, I pushed to my feet and shuffled a few feet away from him before he was able to get up off the floor. I fled the training room for the safety of the cafeteria despite the way Eric had been flaunting the blonde earlier. I paused outside of the doors, debating with myself if this really was the safer place to be, especially when I was already flustered. I didn’t get much of a choice as someone pushed me forward with a hand on the small of my back. I glanced up to find Four hiding a small smile as he met someone’s eyes across the way. My eyes followed his gaze to find fury covering Eric’s face. The blonde was still sitting between his legs but her attention was on the group that sat around them. 

My eyes moved across the group around them, some older than the young leader by a few years. I could feel Eric’s angry gaze follow me as Four pushed me towards a table and made sure I had a glass of water and some fruit with me before he left me on my own but when I looked up again my eyes skipped over Eric’s angry ones to find a familiar honey brown pair that were widened in shock. The eyes belonged to an older man, the same age as my father, if not a little older. He looked like my father, but with my grandmother's eyes. I froze, this had to be the uncle I had been missing my whole life. The black string in my woven bracelet. I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, my eyes finding his arms covered in tattoos and the earring in his ears. A tattoo on his neck brought my eyes to scan his face again. He was the tattooed, muscled version of my dad. 

Four had watched the interaction between me and the other man. Eric’s gaze had burned through Four, missing the entire interaction. Four made his way back towards me and plopped down next to me, the honey gaze flicked to Four and narrowed. 

“You seem to have caught the attention of another leader of Dauntless.” His voice was low in my ear. 

“What?”

“That’s Orion, he was Max’s right hand man until Eric came along. He’s one of our strongest fighters, and one of the most fair leaders in Dauntless.” He sighed. “Even Eric has a healthy respect for him.”

“That makes sense.” I muttered more to myself than Four. 

“Drink your water, today is going to be hard.” 

Four left me again but this time the other initiates had begun to trickle in. Christina saw me first and slid into the seat across from me. Tris, Will, and Al followed her example after they had grabbed breakfast. They wasted no time talking about what they thought we might be doing today, I kept to myself, my thoughts racing. My uncle was a Dauntless leader. 

When breakfast was over we made our way to the training room, a chalkboard was set up with names paired together. I noticed my name next to Tris’s.

“Lucky for you, there is an even number of you so everyone will be fighting today.” Four called out. 

“This isn’t good.” Christina huffed as she elbowed Tris, who huffed in pain. 

“Sorry, But look I’m up against the Tank.”

“The Tank?” Tris questioned as we found Molly’s name next to Christina’s. 

“Yea, Peter’s slightly more feminine looking minion.” 

She used her chin to gesture to the other side of the room where the pretty eyed Candor stood with two other people, Molly and another boy. 

“Those three have been inseparable since they crawled out of the womb, I hate them.” She huffed. 

Will and Al had taken to the ring for their fight, dancing around each other with their hands raised to protect their faces. 

“What’s wrong with them?” Tris asked as her eyes flicked back to the three Candor.

“Peter is pure evil. When we were kids he would pick fights with people from other factions and then, when adults would come to break it up, he would cry and make up a story about how the other kid started it. Of course they believed him, because we were Candor and couldn’t lie.” 

She wrinkled her nose and let out a little huff that could pass as a laugh. 

“Drew is just his sidekick, I doubt he has an independent thought in his brain. Molly is the type of person to fry ants with a magnifying glass just to watch them flail around.” 

Christina was interrupted by the sound of Al punching Will hard in the jaw. I caught sight of Eric smirking across the room as he watched our friends fight. Will stumbled to the side holding his face and blocked Al’s second punch with his free hand. Al may have been slow but he was powerful. Out of the corner of my eye I caught Peter, Drew, and Molly watching us and then whispering amongst themselves. 

“I think they know we’re talking about them.” Tris said.

“So? They already know I hate them.” Christina shrugged. 

“Oh?” I asked. 

I caught Christina faking a smile and waving at them. Tris looked down, her cheeks tinted a light pink, she was feeling the Abnegation shame my mother had told me so much about, but I was my father’s daughter and flipped them off with a wide smile. 

“Because I’ve told them.” Christina admitted through gritted teeth. “We try to be pretty honest about our feelings in Candor. Plenty of people have told me they don’t like me. Plenty of people haven’t. Who cares?” 

“I just..” Tris paused for a moment. 

“You weren’t supposed to hurt people?” I asked. 

“I like to think I’m helping them by hating them. I remind them that they aren’t God's gift to humankind.” Christina shrugged. 

I laughed at her comment. Peter’s green eyes watched me as my fake smile became genuine as Tris giggled beside me. When our laughter had died down we focused on the fight in front of us. Al and Will kept circling each other, glancing at Four waiting for him to call the fight but he didn’t move at all. After a few more seconds of their circling Eric intervened. 

“Do you think this is a leisure activity?” He shouted. “Should we take a break for nap time? Fight each other!” 

“But- is it scored or something? When does the fight end?” Al asked. 

“It ends when one of you is unable to continue.” Eric answered.

“According to Dauntless rules one of you could also concede.” Four quickly followed up. 

Eric’s eyes narrowed at Four. 

“According to the old rules, the new rules no one concedes.” 

“A brave man acknowledges the strength of others.”

“A brave man never surrenders.” Eric rebutted as they two stared at each other intensely for a few seconds. 

The tension between the two was tangible but we all knew that Eric had the authority in this situation as a leader. 

“This is ridiculous!” Al broke the tension. “What’s the point of beating him up? We’re in the same faction.”

“Oh, you think it’s going to be easy?” Will grunted. “Try me, slowpoke.” 

Will raised his hands again ready for another blow from Al. Al swung but Will ducked, the fight went on but Al had his strength and all it took was a good punch in the jaw again that had Will’s pale green eyes rolling into the back of his head. Will hit the ground hard and it took Al a second to realize what he’d done and then he was on the ground next to Will tapping his face lightly to make sure he was okay. It took a few seconds before Will’s eyes blink open, very obviously dazed. 

“Get him up.” Eric ordered as Four made his way towards the board and circled Al’s name.

 “Next up! Molly and Christina!”

Christina cracked her knuckles before entering the ring and Tris wished her luck. Tris wiped her palms on her pants as we watched Molly and Christina fight. Christina managed to get a good kick into Molly’s side but Molly always had the upper hand, and it was made evident when she grabbed Christina and began throwing wild punches until Christina’s blood was dripping down her face and onto the mat below. Tris gripped my arm, nails digging into my skin. Christina’s scream rang through the room as she struggled to get out of the hold that Molly had her in. Soon she was on the ground crawling away from Molly and sobbing but Molly followed after her, landing a kick to her side sending her flying onto her back. 

“Stop!” Christina wailed. “Stop! I’m done.” 

Molly smiled. 

Eric approached Christina with a predatory look, while Tris and Al had relaxed next to me, I knew from his earlier words and the anger he had shown at breakfast that he was not going to let this go easily. 

“I’m sorry, what did you say? You’re done?” 

He was standing over Christina with his arms folded. 

Christina nodded. 

“Get up.” Eric’s voice was quiet. 

He grabbed Christina’s arm and dragged her up onto her feet and towards the door. 

“Follow me.” Eric demanded with a sweeping glance at the rest of us.

We did as we were told, following Eric through the Pit towards the Chasm. The sound of rushing water was loud in our ears as Eric shoved Christina against the railing. 

“Climb over it.” He instructed. 

“What?” Her tone was weepy but filled with disbelief as if Eric was joking.

“Climb over the railing.” He said slowly as if he was talking to a child. “If you can hang over the Chasm for five minutes, I will forget your cowardice. If not, I will not allow you to continue initiation.” 

“Fine.” Christina’s voice shook. 

We all watched in anticipation as she swung her foot over the ledge and wiped her palms from the blood and sweat that had collected there before gripping the rail and letting her feet kick off the ledge. Al’s watch was set and for the first minute and a half Christina seemed to be doing okay, but the river was unpredictable and it splashed across her back forcing her body into the railing. Her hands were wet and she was barely holding on with her finger tips. Her face had crumpled into tears and her sobs were louder than the roaring of the river, until Al began cheering her on. 

Tris was silent beside me and I took the opportunity to shift closer to Christina, ready to dive to grab her if she continued to slip. She managed to grab the rail again but as fate would have it the river hit her again and her grip on the railing faltered. She fell into the river but managed to catch herself on the bottom rung of the barrier and held on tightly. When Al’s watch beeped to mark the end of five minutes I was the first to the barrier, grabbing her arm and hauling her up. Al was behind me and grabbed her. I waited until Al had brought her high enough, grabbed her shoulder, and tugged her over the barrier. Tris grabbed the back of my shirt and helped me pull her up. When we were over the barrier she crashed to the ground, shivering weak in the knees. She met my eyes, then Tris and Al’s. I allowed the other two to drag her away, Eric stood watching as everyone dispersed.

“That was cruel.” I said as I turned to face him. 

He offered me his hand to help me off the ground.

“This is how it has to be.”

“Why?” I demanded. 

“Because the weak won’t survive here.”

“Because it’s Dauntless?”

“Because of what’s coming.” His eyes flashed a warning and I shut my mouth. 

Eric left me standing there alone. I was stunned. He had just admitted that something was coming, something I should have no knowledge of. I took off after the rest of the group to continue our training. 

My fight with Tris took place, I tried to give her a chance to land several blows but she was weak and her punches did nothing. Eric got fed up with me and snapped at me to fight her for real, instead of playing with me food. Two well placed punches did the least amount of damage while also knocking Tris out. 

I knew we had been paired together because of our factions and our size. We were shorter than the others and both of us were taught no violence. After my fight I took my anger out on the punching bags, letting it wear me out until it was time for dinner. I was the first to shower, while the others explored the Pit and the rest of the compound. I let the water wash away the anger and confusion that had haunted me the entire day. By the time I crawled into bed the other initiates had only just begun to come back and shower. 

The sound of someone having a nightmare woke me the next morning. I stretched in my bed before I got dressed in another all black outfit. This one left part of my midriff exposed, hugging every curve I had. I made my way towards the cafeteria once again, finding it mostly empty and heading towards the training room instead. There I found Eric and Orion fighting. I watched the two men, it was almost like watching people dancing. They were incredibly graceful for such muscular men. I had missed the cheering crowd behind them until someone called out for them to stop. 

“We’ve got a little mouse watching us.” 

Both men in the ring paused before they turned to face me. I froze like a deer in headlights, frozen by all the attention that was now on me.

“Well little mouse, are you going to come in and watch? Or would you rather fight one of us?” Eric taunted me. 

“I’m sure I could hold my own.” I said with confidence despite the fact that I knew I was getting into a bad situation. 

“Pick your partner, we’ll go easy on you I promise.” Eric grinned. 

“I don’t feel right fighting one of my instructors, it would be awkward if I were to beat you.” I teased. 

“I’ll fight you, little rabbit.” Orion’s deep voice answered my challenge. 

I moved into the ring, taking Eric’s place. I knew the base of all of Orion’s training, it was the same as mine. I might not have been fighting for as long as he had but I was betting that I could hold my own since I had been taught by his father. I dropped into my fighting stance, one that mirrored his own. His eyebrow raised at my actions but he said nothing. He swung first, the force of his blow just missing my face caused my bangs to sway. I was smaller and faster on my feet. I returned with a punch of my own before I aimed my foot at his knee. I danced around Orion the way my grandfather had taught me. I caught sight of his lips twitching into a smile as his knuckles grazed my lip, a small cut forming. His smile became a full blown smile when I managed to split his eyebrow. Finally I managed to get him on the ground and he was laughing. 

“Orion, you pulled your punches too much, she’ll never learn that way.” Eric complained. 

“No Eric, I didn’t pull anything. She is a better fighter than you. She uses her size to her advantage.” 

“I’m not as skilled a fighter as you’re trying to make me out to be.” I mumbled as I offered my uncle a hand up.

“Little rabbit, you are going to be the best of the new initiate group.” He grinned. 

“Is he smiling?” Someone asked. 

“Who are you that made the stone-faced leader grin?”

“Stone faced? I thought that was Eric?” 

“Eric learned it from Orion.”

“She’s my niece.” Orion answered. 

My head whipped back to face Orion, the shock on my face reflected on Eric’s face as well. 

“What?” I stuttered. 

“I would recognize my brother’s child anywhere. You have the same blind confidence in your skills that he had. Raising to any challenge.”  

“This stays between us.” Eric hissed at the group around us. 

“Why?” I asked. 

“Because if people knew, it would be assumed that if you did well it wasn’t on your own merit.” Someone said softly. 

“No one breathes a word of this outside of this room is that clear?” Orion reiterated Eric’s threat. 

“Go clean your face before you go to breakfast.” Eric barked the order at me. 

I glanced at Orion who nodded in agreement before I turned and walked back the way I had come. I was in the bathroom washing my face when I heard someone toss and turn before finally getting out of bed. As the footsteps passed me I caught Tris’s reflection in the mirror. A shower turned on in the bathroom, I heard more shuffling as I began to braid my hair. Tris walked past me again this time she nodded her head in my direction before going back to her bed.   

“Nice decorations.” a male voice said. 

“Did I do something to you that I’m unaware of?” Tris asked. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but we’re in the same faction now.”

“I don’t know what you’re referring to. And you and I will never be in the same faction.” 

I walked from the bathroom while Tris and Peter stared each other down. 

“We don’t have time for this.” I muttered in Tri’s ear as I passed her. 

I headed to breakfast as everyone else filtered into the hallway behind me. We ate in silence before we were herded into the training room by Four. 

 The chalkboard had been rewritten with new matches, Tris’s name was next to Peter’s. 

“Oh no.” Chrstitina said from behind me I turned to find her standing next to Tris and Al. 

“Are they serious? They’re really going to make you fight him?” 

“Maybe you can take a few hits and pretend to go unconscious.” Al suggested. 

“Yea. Maybe.” She replied. 

I had no advice to offer her, Peter wasn’t a threat to me. 

“Good luck.” I whispered as I moved away from the three of them. 

Molly was losing to Edward and part of me got a sick thrill out of watching her take a beating. When Molly was finally knocked out, Tris and Peter were called into the ring. Peter began taunting Tris but I was too focused on watching for any hints of a weak spot to pay much mind to his words. Whatever he said bothered Tris enough that she tried to hit him with her leg but she was too slow, he caught her leg and had her on the ground in seconds. 

“Stop playing with her. I don’t have all day.” Eric snapped. 

Something shifted in Peter’s face and he was on her in a flash. The match was over in five minutes, Tris made every effort to dodge and stay on her feet but Peter beat her unconscious. 

“Enough!” Eric snapped again. 

Christina was quick to gather Tris up in her arms and bring her to the infirmary. If Eric hadn’t shouted my name I would have gone with her. I had been put against Will, I had him on the ground and too disoriented to keep fighting in the same amount of time Peter managed to win his fight. As soon as Eric dismissed me I took off to the infirmary in order to check on Tris. Christina, Will, and Al sat there with me for hours before she started to stir, I didn’t stay until she was fully awake. I had only needed to know that she would wake up. Peter might have been pretty but he was vicious. I lost myself to thought as I moved around the compound, going up and up and up until I was on a rooftop. 

I sat in the fading sunlight until the sky was dark. The wind blew through my waves as I let everything fade from my mind. I didn’t move when I heard the door open behind me. If someone wanted to push me off the ledge they would need to be quieter than that.

“Why am I not surprised to find you up here?” Eric’s voice called. 

“You tell me.” I turned my head to watch him move closer. 

“You’re like a cat. Cute and unassuming until your claws need to come out, hiding in the highest places.”

“You think I’m cute?” I smiled at him.

“Is that all you got out of that?” He chuckled.

“Well what else should I take from it?”

“The fact that I think you’re an amazing fighter?”

“A compliment from Eric?” I fake gasped. 

He rolled his eyes.

“What? You think I can’t compliment people?”

“Honestly? I think you only say nice things when you want something from someone.” 

Eric paused and really looked at me in the little light that shone from the moon. His eyes searched mine for some hint of a joke. 

“Explain.” He insisted. 

“You kissed me, but the next morning there was another girl in your lap. Girls and feelings are a game for you to play with until you get bored of them. You love to watch us fight each other, you’re cruel to those you believe are below you. You say nice things to me, you want something from me. I am not a game to play Eric. I will not have my heart broken because I’m the newest shiny toy to walk through those doors.”

“Who said you’re a game?”

“If you wanted me then you would find a way to learn who I am. But you haven’t.”

“And Four has?” 

“No, he hasn’t, and he isn’t interested in me anyway.”

“Yes he is.” 

“It doesn’t matter. Neither of you can have me until I pass initiation.”

I moved off the ledge and back towards the door.

“I am not a consolation prize in your weird fucked up fight with Four. Don’t make me into one.”

I let the door shut behind me as I moved away from the stunned leader. 

The following morning I was up before the others. Four was waiting outside the dorm for me, gesturing for me to follow him. I followed him out of the compound and then began jogging with him through the city. We did laps around the Dauntless part of the city. 

“You have to be on the train by eight fifteen, Once we finish this lap go shower and change for the field trip.”

Four escorted me back to the dorms before anyone was awake and well before it was time to be on the train. I showered, pulled on tight black pants with a tight cropped black shirt under a leather jacket that I left unzipped, I was hot but the wind on the train was enough to have me shivering without a jacket.

 I followed Peter and his group to breakfast. I grabbed a seat at an empty table and was less than thrilled when Peter sat across from me. 

“How’s the Stiff? I gave her some pretty bad bruises.” 

“It’s none of your business.” I rolled my eyes at him. 

“I’m just trying to make conversation.” He chuckled. 

“Why?” I shot back. 

“You’re in the top five, you should have friends who are more likely to stay at the top with you. Who will pass initiation.” 

“And you think that means I should pal around with you and your group of bullies?”

“You need strong supporters. Someone in your corner when the wolves start to circle.” 

“Wolves?” I frowned at him. 

“You’re a gorgeous girl, you think people haven’t noticed?”

“And you want to be my protector?”

“I want to be a lot of things for you, but you have to let me.”

I noticed Al and Will sitting not too far away from where I was with Peter. 

“I think I’ll take my chances.” I answered. 

I dropped down into an empty seat next to Will as he and Al continued their conversation. They nodded at me in acknowledgement but didn’t bother to drag me into their conversation. I followed them out of the Pit and up the stairs to the glass building where the exit was. We stood around waiting for the train when I heard footsteps behind us. I turned to find Christina and Tris catching up to the group as the train got closer. I was pleased that they had made it in time but felt bad that I hadn’t noticed them missing sooner.  

I shifted to where Four stood as the train got closer. Four took off first and opened the doors of the train. He moved over as I pulled myself into the train right behind him. Will landed on his stomach. Tris rolled into the train car behind us. 

“Feeling okay there?” I heard Peter’s voice. “Or are you a little Stiff?” 

I rolled my eyes as Molly and Drew laughed at his terrible joke. 

 “We are all awed by your incredible wit.” Will was the first to retort. 

“Yea, are you sure you don’t belong with the Erudite Peter? I hear they don’t object to sissies.” Christina added on. 

“Am I going to have to listen to you bickering all the way to the Fence?” Four’s stern voice flooded the space. 

No one answered him, instead they all fell silent. He was standing in the door leaning out of the train, the wind pressing his shirt tight against his body and he was definitely a sight to behold. Instead of joining in on a conversation I chose to sit in a different doorway the way Four had. I was grateful that I had thought to braid my hair while we were waiting for the train as the wind whipped the two braids behind me. I could feel the train start to slow down as the breeze dissipated. I braced myself against the door as the brakes squealed and we all lurched forward as the train fully stopped. There were yellow fields around us and we had stopped under an awning. I quickly jumped from the train after watching Four do it. I found my eyes drawn to the chain link fence and the Dauntless on the other side of it with their guns. This was Amity, or at least part of the farmland. 

“Follow me!” Four shouted. 

It was clear to me that Tris was uncomfortable and I didn’t blame her, it was a new setting for her and they had no idea what to expect, but I was home. We followed Four to a gate that I had gone through before, when I had been chosen to bring the harvest into the city. 

“If you don’t rank in the top five at the end of initiation you will probably end up here. Once you are a fence guard there is some potential for advancement but not much. You may be able to go on patrol beyond Amity’s farms but-” 

“Patrols for what purpose?” Will cut Four off. 

“I suppose you’ll discover that if you find yourself among them. For the most part those who guard the fence when they are young continue to guard the fence. If it’s a comfort to you, some of them insist that it’s not as bad as it seems.” Four continued his little lecture. 

Christina whispered something to Tris but I was a little too far from them to hear. 

“What rank were you?” Peter asked Four. 

“I was first.” Four answered, leveling Peter with a look. 

“And you chose to do this? Why didn’t you get a government job?” There was a hint of disbelief in his voice. 

“I didn’t want one.” Four deadpanned. 

He was a good teacher, willing to work with us on the things we really needed help on. He also worked in the control room, something that seemed to make sense for someone who seemed to want control of a situation more often than not. We moved closer to the gate as it began to open to allow for a truck to pass through, the man driving had a smile on his face and was happy to hop out. The back of the truck held crates of apples and other members of Amity.

“Beatrice?” a male voice called from the back. 

A boy in Amity colors came into view, Tris’s head shot up at the sound of her name. He hopped down from the back of the truck and approached us. He pulled Tris into a hug, she stood stiffly in his arms. 

“Beatrice what happened to you? What happened to your face?” 

He had caught sight of the bruises and like anyone outside of Dauntless was expressing concern for a friend. 

“Nothing, just training.” Tris was quick to answer. 

“Beatrice? Is that your name Stiff?” Molly taunted. 

“Shut up Molly.” I snapped.                      

“What did you think Tris was short for?” Tris asked her. 

“I don’t know, weakling? Oh wait, that doesn’t start with Tris.”

“God you’re stupid.” I said, shaking my head at her. 

“You think you can beat me?” Molly challenged. 

“I know I can.” I smirked.

“There’s no need to antagonize each other.” The Amity stepped in. “My name is Robert, and you are?”

 He looked at Molly. 

“Someone who doesn’t care what your name is. Why don’t you get back in your truck? We’re not supposed to fraternize with other factions.”

“So why don’t you get away from us?” Tris snapped. 

“Right, I wouldn't want to get between you and your boyfriend.” She shot Tris a dirty look before she walked away. 

“They don’t seem like nice people.” Robert admitted. 

“Some of them aren’t.” Tris said. 

“You could go home you know, I’m sure Abnegation would make an exception for you.” 

I rolled my eyes and walked away from them. I watched Tris snap at Robert before he got back in the truck, as it finished pulling through the gate the guards locked the gate. It struck me as odd that the lock for the gate would be on the outside, almost as if they were trying to keep us in. I watched Four have a small exchange with Tris before we can hear the sound of the train again. 

“Looks like the next train is here. Time to go.” Four raised his voice. 

The train ride home was much the same to the one we started with, Four let us all know that he expected us all in the training room after lunch and once we made it back to the compound that is exactly what we did. The rest of the day was spent working out individually, no more fights. The rest of the training went quickly and I found myself back on the rooftop watching the sunset before I allowed myself a shower and a good night's rest.

Chapter Text

I let myself relax in bed the following morning. I was still eating breakfast before everyone else but I was trying to make it less obvious that I was training more than the others despite not needing it. I took my time braiding my hair out of my face and choosing which clothes would allow me to move the most during the fights. When I finally left for breakfast the others were just starting to get up. Breakfast was filled with more people this time around, and I slipped into an open seat next to Uriah, Lynn, and Marlene. They were quick to bring me into their conversation, poking fun at me for being so small and still being so high in the rankings. It was easy with them, the comradery that was based on nothing but our ability to tease each other without anyone getting upset. They shared secrets with me as we waited for our day to get started. 

“Why is he looking at you like that?” Lynn questioned as she gutted her chin behind me. 

I turned to find not only Four, but Eric and Peter staring hard at me. Uriah had just rested his arm around my shoulders as we were laughing. 

“They’re jealous obviously.” He grinned in their faces. 

“I’m not worried about it.” I shrugged. 

“Well you might want to, it’s time to go.” Marlene said as people started to move out of the room. 

I found myself being guided by my three new friends to the training room, they took the far half while the transfers took the closer side, I had always been too focused on my group and the fights to look further into the room. They waved to me as they kept walking and I stopped in front of the wooden chalkboard. My name was next to Molly’s. I could tell that she thought it would be an easy fight, she had several inches on me and more muscle, but I had watched her fights and I knew that she would be no match for me. I wouldn’t feel bad for hurting her. 

We squared up in the ring, shouts of encouragement filled the space around us. She swung first, her movements hard and heavy. She wanted to end this quickly and was hoping to do some damage. I hit her in the throat first before I kicked her knees out from under her. She was choking on the ground while I punched her face, leaving her bruised and bleeding on the floor. She had never stood a chance and when I walked out of the ring I saw the way everyone around me suddenly realized just how dangerous I was. Eric was grinning, having seen me fight my uncle and the match called a draw. Four’s mouth hung open with surprise, expecting me to no doubt have taken a few hits from someone Molly’s size. Peter’s eyes sparkled as he took in this more dangerous version of me. Tris and Christina however were just happy for the win, one they considered a victory over the assholes. They slapped my shoulders and cheered as they moved me to the side so the next fight could take place. Christina fought and lost, having to go to the infirmary to get checked out, leaving me sitting alone while Tris fought Myra. 

“I knew you had the power, I just didn’t realize how much you pulled your punches with everyone.” Eric said as he stood behind me. 

“Well most of the time I feel bad about hurting people.”

“And this time?”

“She needed to be humbled.”

“So you’re just dishing out justice where you see fit?” He lowered his voice. 

“No, I simply saw an opportunity to remind her that size isn’t everything.”

Eric’s chuckle rumbled in his chest. 

“I don’t want to hear it.” I rolled my eyes. 

“I think you should stop pulling punches. I’m going to put you against harder opponents.”

“I’m ready.” 

I heard Eric shuffle away from me to get a better view of the current fight. Peter shuffled into the empty spot. 

“Getting help with your fights Amity?”

“No Hayes, he happened to be remarking on how I pulled my punches.” 

“You pulled your punches?” 

I turned to look at him, his green eyes bright with curiosity. 

“Why do you care?”

“Because you hit her hard.” 

“That’s the point of learning to fight, but I didn’t want to leave her out of training for days at a time, unlike you.” I shot him a discouraging look.

“I’m here to be on top. I want to live comfortably here.”

“You want to be tapped to be a leader?”

“So what?”

“You’ll have to fight me for it.” I smiled at him before I got up and left the room. 

Four caught my arm by the door. 

“What was that?”

“Which part?” I asked. 

“With Hayes.”

“I was just warning him that he wasn’t the only one aiming to be tapped as a leader.” I shrugged. 

“You want to be a leader?” Four asked incredulously.

“Yes, I think youngblood is better than old, new eyes to see things that need to change.”

I moved out of the room, leaving Four shocked. I took a long shower when I got back to the room, taking advantage of people still training and others having gone to get dinner once we had been given permission to leave. I was feeling better by the time I walked into dinner, Uriah was quick to grab me when I stepped into the room. He guided me closer to the tables where the Dauntless were all seated, the initiates all ate at one table usually and people avoided it if they could. I felt eyes on me as I sat with the Dauntless born and began joking with them, it had become so easy to be there with them. I glanced up when an intense gaze hit me. It was Orion, sitting with the rest of the people Eric claimed as his friends. Eric sat there too, his eyes watching my actions with a little too much scrutiny. I smiled and waved my finger in greeting before I brought my attention back to my friends. 

I left before the others. When I stepped into the dark hallway a strong arm reached out to grab me. I gasped in shock as my back hit the wall of a small unlit alcove. Eric stood before me, pressed up against me as he shuffled us further into the dark. 

“You’re getting too much attention.” he whispered in my ear. 

“How is that my fault?”

“People are beginning to whisper about you. So I’m going to do my best to help you succeed.”

“Why?” I searched his eyes for an answer but found nothing. 

“Go to sleep early tonight, you’ll need as much rest as possible for what’s coming next.”

He kissed me then, hard and rushed but his hands were gentle as they held my waist. Before he pulled away quickly and left me there stunned. I knew better than to ignore Eric’s help, and his warning about needing sleep. I found myself on autopilot as I made my way back to my bed. I sat on the bed braiding my hair into two separate braids making sure to pull all of my hair back into the braids to keep it fully out of my face. I laid a change of clothes at the foot of my bed before I stripped down to my underwear and climbed under the covers. I wasn’t tired enough to fall asleep immediately but my body began to adjust and I was asleep by the time the rest of the initiation group was coming in to get ready. 

“Everybody up!” Eric’s voice filled the room. 

I rolled over to find Four and several other Dauntless members watching us as they waited to see who would get up first. I popped out from under the covers as everyone else was startled awake. Eric stopped by my bed, his gaze swept over me before his gaze landed behind me. I began to pull on the clothes that I had laid out on my bed. First was a pair of tight black pants, then a long sleeved cropped shirt before I sat to put my shoes on. I didn’t need anyone to tell me that we would be doing something, and some of the others seemed to have gotten the same idea.  

“Did you go deaf Stifff?” Eric bellowed as he moved past me to stand in front of Tris and Christina’s bunk. 

I caught Four and Peter both following the curves of my body as they watched me pull on my clothes.. 

“You have five minutes to get dressed and meet us by the tracks. We’re going on another field trip.” Eric instructed as the room began to shuffle and they left. 

I was out the door behind them as soon as I finished tying my shoes. I was the first to the tracks, Four handed me a gun and a box of paintballs. I could hear the footsteps behind me and it seemed that none of the transfers were surprised to see me already there but I could hear many of the Dauntless born murmuring to themselves about the Amity transfer that was already armed and ready to go. My gaze landed on Uriah, Marleen, and Lynn. I smiled and waved lightly as they followed Eric’s orders to pick up a gun and ammunition. They grinned at me, happy to see me. They gathered close to me as we awaited further instructions. 

“Time estimate?” Eric asked.

“Any minute now. How long is it going to take you to memorize the train schedule?” Four scoffed at the young leader. 

“Why should I when I have you to remind me?” Eric shoved Four’s shoulder. 

Then the light appeared, growing brighter as it got closer casting a shadow across Four’s face. He took off for the train ready to open the doors so that the rest of us could have an easier time getting on. I was right behind him, managing to pass him and pull myself onto the step outside the car door, I hit the button to open all the doors and threw myself in as Four grinned at me as he pulled himself in. He reached out his arm to someone behind him. Tris. She moved herself to the opposite side of the car and I raised an eyebrow at Four before joining her. Once everyone was on the train, Four began to explain. 

“We’ll be dividing into two teams to play capture the flag. Each team will have an even mix of members, Dauntless born initiates, and transfers. One team will get off the train first and find a place to hide their flag. Then the second team will get off and do the same. This is a Dauntless tradition so I suggest you take this seriously.” Four said as he grabbed the side of the train to keep steady as it swayed. 

“What do we get if we win?” Someone asked. 

“Sounds like the kind of question someone not from Dauntless would ask, you get to win of course.” 

“Four and I will be your team captains.” Eric announced. “Let’s divide up the transfers first shall we?” 

“You first.” Four said. 

“Edward.” Eric shrugged. 

“I want Amity and the Stiff” Four said, Tris and I exchanged a look and I heard Eric release a low growl.. 

“One at a time Four.”

“Fine, Roe.” 

“Peter.”

“Tris.”

“Got something to prove? Or are you just picking the weak ones so that if you lose you have someone to blame.”

“Something like that.”

“Molly.”

“Christina.”

“Al.”

“Will.” Four called as he picked at his nails in disinterest. 

“Drew for me and Myra for you Eric.”

 It was obvious that Eric didn’t want Myra on his team but he just kept going with the Dauntless born initiates. I heard Uriah’s name called and then Marleen and Lynn but with the buzz of the transfers around me it was hard to tell whose voice had called out the names of my friends. As I watched people shuffle around the train car I began to notice the pattern in players that Four had been picking, we were all smaller than Eric’s broad shouldered fighters which meant we were faster and could fit into smaller spaces to avoid being hit or seen. 

“Your team can get off second.” Eric decided when they had finally finished picking teams. 

“Don’t do me any favors.” Four smirked. “You know I don’t need them to win.” 

“No I know that you’ll lose no matter when you get off, take your scrawny team and get off first.” Eric huffed. 

Four’s team stood as one and we all shuffled to the doors. I waited for the dip in the train and jumped out, landing in a light jog so that I didn’t tuck and roll. Once we were all out we gathered around Four. Marleen touched Four’s shoulder and he turned to acknowledge her. 

“When you won, where did you hide the flag?” 

“Telling you wouldn’t be in the spirit of the exercise Marleen.” Four gave her a disapproving look. . 

“Come on Four.” She whined at him batting her eyes at him in an attempt to be flirty but he brushed her hand off of him. 

“Navy Pier.” Uriah offered up. “My brother was on the winning team. They kept the flag at the carousel.” 

“Let’s go there then.” Will suggested. 

Four led the way, Uriah linked his arm with mine on one side and Marleen on the other while she linked her arm with Lynn. As we got further from the city the buildings began to look much more like the apocalyptic city we had been told that Chigaco had been before the faction system was put in place. Once we were across the muddy remnants of the dried up river Marleen pulled out a flashlight. 

“Scared of the dark Mar,?” Uriah teased. 

“If you want to step on broken glass, be my guest.” She snapped but turned off the light anyway. 

Part of being Dauntless was making things harder for yourself in favor of being self-sufficient.My grandfather has stressed the importance of being able to do everything for myself, he pushed me until I didn’t need anyone. Our group came to a stop before the marsh, where the Ferris wheel stood proud at the end of the strip of land. I could hear Tris, Christina, and Will joking around but I couldn’t care less about anything they were saying, I was in awe. We stopped at the carousel and Four pulled the flag from his pocket. 

“In ten minutes the other team will have picked their location. I suggest you use this time to form a strategy. We may not be Erudite but mental preparedness is one aspect of your Dauntless training. Arguably the most important.” 

“Some people should stay here and guard, some should go and scout the other team’s location.” Will said as he took the flag from Four. 

“Yea? You think? Who put you in charge transfer?” Marleen asked. 

“No one but someone’s gotta do it.” Will snapped back at her. 

“Maybe we should develop a more defensive strategy. Wait for them to come to us, then take them out.” Christina offered. 

“That’s the sissy way out.” Uriah huffed. “I say we go all out and hide the flag well enough that they can’t find it.”

 Everyone began shouting their opinions, I took the opportunity to sneak away. I moved almost silently towards the Ferris wheel and without a second thought I began to climb it. I was halfway up when I heard a noise behind me. I paused to find that Tris had followed me and Four was hot on her tail. Annoyance flared through me but I didn’t stop as I pushed myself to reach the highest point of the Ferris wheel. 

I spread my arms out as the wind threatened to drag me over the edge. I stared at the starry night sky and grinned. I took a deep breath, bathing in the moonlight. I gave myself one more moment before I searched the landscape to find the other team and their flag. Four was crouched with his body tightly pressed against the support bar, a nervous look in his eye. I grinned and began to shimmy my way down to meet them. 

“Did you see them?” I asked. 

Tris nodded. 

“So this was your idea?” Four grunted out. “You two are gonna kill me.”

“You didn’t have to follow me up, you made that choice.” I smiled cheekily at him. 

“So the light is coming from the park at the end of the pier, figures. It’s surrounded by open space but the trees provide some camouflage. Obviously not enough.”

“Not from this high up. But they wouldn’t expect us to be up here.” I grinned.

“Um, start climbing down, we’ll follow you.” Tris instructed Four. 

Four began his descent and when he was out of ear shot Tris turned to look at me again.

“Do you not get nervous up here?” 

“I grew up in Amity, remember? We have orchards for miles, I’ve been climbing trees almost as long as I could walk.” I smiled at her. 

“Sometimes I think you were made for Dauntless, but then you do something so out of left field that I can’t help but wonder if I’m wrong..” She admitted. 

“Tris-”

“Are you guys coming?” Four shouted up at us. 

“Yea!” I shouted back. “Race you to the bottom?”

Tris grinned up at me before she took off down the Ferris wheel. A creaking sound caught my attention as I rushed down a different path and Tris’s voice shouting for help caused me to panic.

“Hold on! Just hold on, I have an idea!” Four shouted as he began climbing down faster. 

I wrapped my legs around a bar and I grabbed her wrist, trying to pull her up towards me so that she could grab the bar below where my legs were. 

“Don’t let go!” She cried. 

A wheezing and creaking sound surrounded us as the wheel began to turn. I laughed loudly and grinned wildly at Tris as she began to get closer to the ground. 

“ It’s like getting on and off the train!” I shouted before I let go of her hand. 

I watched Tris as she dropped to the ground and rolled away, I flipped my body at the last second so that my feet caught the ground and I jogged lightly as I let go of the bar. Four rushed to push me out of the way of getting hit by the car behind me. We rolled in the opposite direction Tris had gone, when we stopped rolling Four was above me, taking in my face to make sure I was in one piece. I let out a light laugh as Four stared down at me. 

“You idiot! How could you be so reckless?! You knew there was a car behind yours, why didn’t you move faster?”

“You saved me just in time.” I said with a smile still on my face. 

“Are you enjoying this?”

“I mean, it was quite a rush.”

His blue eyes searched mine for a split second before he bent to press his lips against mine. I was frozen for a moment, trying to process what was happening before my instincts kicked in and I kissed him back. He pulled away first and he was smirking down at me. He gave a light shake of his head and let out a real laugh. He rolled off of me and we both laid there for a minute before I sat up in a panic. 

“Oh shit, Tris!” I exclaimed as we both scrambled to get up. 

On the other side of the Ferris wheel Tris lay on the ground with her palms pressed to her eyes. I crouched down next to her and pried one of her hands away from her face.

“You okay?” I grinned down at her. 

She nodded as she moved her other hand away from her face. Four took her  hand as I stood up and we both pulled her to her feet. Once we were standing, laughter struck us, Four started it, Tris and I followed. The wind from the still turning wheel whipped around us. 

“You could have told us the wheel still worked!” Tris exclaimed. “Then we wouldn’t have had to climb it.”

“I didn’t know it worked!” I shrugged, we both turned to Four. 

“I would have if I had known. Couldn’t let you just hang there so I took a risk.” he shrugged. “Come on, time to go get their flag.”

Four grabbed my hand lightly and we rushed back to the carousel. Christina was perched on one of the animals, the flag a small glowing triangle behind her. Other Dauntless members were spread out among the animals as well, acting as guards. 

“Where did the others go?” Four asked. 

“Did you turn on the wheel?” an older Dauntless asked. “What the hell were you thinking? It’s a big flashing we are here sign! If I lose again the shame will be unbearable! Three years in a row!”

“It doesn’t matter, we know where they are!” I smiled triumphantly at her. 

“We?” Christina asked. 

“Roe and Tris climbed the Ferris wheel to find them while the rest of you twiddled your thumbs.” Four said proudly. “They’re at the park at the end of the pier.” 

“So what do we do?” 

“Split in half?” Tris said as she looked at me. 

I nodded. 

“One group of four to charge them, the other group to sneak around them and grab the flag.” I advised. 

“Sounds good! Let’s get this night over with!” the older girl said as she stood up.

I led the team going right, Christina and Uriah joined me while Four and Tris led the other group left. Uriah passed me and in that moment I caught a glimpse of his snake tattoo. Christina was fast, her legs were longer than mine but I matched her pace easily. I sprinted ahead of my group,  my finger lightly on the trigger of my gun ready for a fight. I slowed to a stop, trying to keep the element of surprise by sneaking through the trees as silently as I could. I could hear the shouts when someone spotted the other group. I spotted their flag high in a tree and wasted no time climbing branches to get it as the others distracted the guards. It was easy for an Amity born to climb even the toughest trees. I let out a whoop of joy as I fell out of the tree and waved the flag at my teammates, Uriah’s voice was the first to join mine then Tris and Christina. We rushed towards the chorus of yells as we got closer to the train, our team running to meet us before we had to run to catch the train that was quickly approaching. 

We pulled ourselves into the cars like always and suddenly everyone was swarming me. I let the energy of the group flow through me as the air rushed through the open doors, there were choruses of congratulations and shouts of victory from my team. Four grinned at me from across the train. I caught sight of Eric scowling at Four before his eyes found mine. The corner of his mouth tugged up slightly at the sight of me. Breathless, hair wild, and grinning from ear to ear.  The shouting and laughter pulled my attention towards Uriah trying to squeeze paint onto Tris but managing to get it into his mouth instead. I grinned at them as Tris’s eyes raised to meet mine. This was what it meant to be Dauntless. 

I woke the following morning to find Four standing over me with his hand on my shoulder. He put a finger up to his lips and motioned towards the door, I nodded in acknowledgement before I hopped out of bed and got dressed. I left my hair in its braids from the night before. Four silently led me out of the compound and we began a light jog. Once we were out in the quiet city and far enough away from prying eyes he began to ask questions. 

“So the Ferris wheel?” 

“I’m from Amity. I’ve been climbing trees my whole life.”

“A lot happened last night that made it hard for me to sleep.”

“Like what?” I questioned.

 He was silent for a moment as we came to the edge of the Dauntless section of the city before he stopped. He turned to face me as I stretched out my body. 

“You were reckless, in trying to save Tris and for climbing that Ferris wheel. But seeing you up there, I don’t know how to describe it. When I looked up you were sitting there. The moon lit up your face and you looked so calm. For a moment I forgot to be afraid.”

“You kissed me.”

“I did.”

“Do you regret it?”

He opened his mouth but closed it again.

“Roe-”

“I don’t want an excuse, it was a yes or no question.”

“No.”

“But?”

“I’m your instructor.”

“Right.” I let my mask of indifference fall into place.

I didn’t wait for Four as I began jogging back. He caught up to me with ease but as soon as we approached the area that guards could see I took off ahead of him and beat him into the building. I headed to breakfast and was thrilled to find Christina and Will already there, I grabbed some food and joined them. Orion sat across the room and when our eyes met he smiled at me. It was odd to see the intimidating man smile, but I knew it was his way of telling me that he was proud of my win last night.

When we entered the training room there stood large wooden targets with knives set up on a table next to the door. Eric stood in the middle of the room, obvious to everyone that he was upset about his loss. Capture the flag was a matter of pride, and pride was a big deal among the Dauntless. 

“Tomorrow will be the last day of stage one, you will resume fighting then. Today you will learn how to aim. Everyone pick up three knives and pay attention while Four demonstrates the correct technique for throwing them.” 

No one moved.

 “Now!” He snapped. 

I was close to the table and snagged three knives before I shuffled to get a better view of Four. I knew how to do it, and it felt good to have the well balanced steel in my hands again. When Four had finished everyone was in awe.

“Everyone line up.” 

As everyone scrambled to follow Eric’s orders I found myself facing a target and settling into the right stance. I didn't waste time and lodged all three of my knives into the wooden board before anyone else had even had a chance to throw theirs. I felt Eric and Fours eyes on me as I gathered three more knives from the table and lodged them deep into the wood. 

All six of my knives sat clustered in the center of the target. 

A half hour later the only person who hadn’t landed a hit on the wooden target was Al. We all grabbed our knives out of the target while he grabbed his off the floor. As Eric approached him it was obvious that Eric was looking for a fight, and Al was too scared to stand up for himself. 

“How slow are you Candor? Do you need glasses?  Should I move the target closer to you?” Eric’s presence loomed over Al as he tried to throw another knife. 

It missed. 

“What was that initiate?” Eric demanded. 

“It- it slipped.” Al stuttered out. 

“Well I think you should go get it.” Eric said before he turned to look at the rest of us, all of us having stopped throwing our knives in favor of watching whatever was going to happen between the two large men. 

“Did I tell you to stop?” He asked us as the anger flashed in his eyes. 

No one wasted a second as they began to throw knives again, everyone but me.

“Go get it? But everyone is still throwing.” Al argued. 

“And?” 

“And I don’t want to get hit.”

“I think you can trust your fellow initiates to aim better than you. Go get your knife.” Eric demanded. 

Al had never argued about anything before but it was obvious from his body language that he had reached his limit. 

“No.”

“Why not? Are you afraid?”

“Of getting stabbed by an airborne knife? Yes I am!” Al exclaimed. 

“Everyone stop!” Eric’s voice doomed over the dull thuds of the knives. 

“Clear out the ring. All except you.” He pointed at Al. 

We all dropped our knives as we gathered at the edge of the room.  

“Stand in front of the target. Four, give me a hand here huh?” Eric called over his shoulder. 

Four who had been scratching his eyebrow with the tip of a knife approached Eric. 

“You’re going to stand there as he throws these knives. Until you learn not to flinch.”

“Is this really necessary?” Four asked in a bored tired voice. 

The question was a challenge, something that Four didn’t often do. 

“I have the authority here, remember? Here and everywhere else.” Eric snapped. 

It took me only a split second to think the thought before I was opening my mouth to say something. 

“Wait.” Everyone turned to face me, Tris’s mouth half open to say something as well. 

“What?” Eric hissed. 

“Is standing in front of a target supposed to teach him to throw better? Or to teach him to not be afraid? Most normal people would be afraid of knives flying towards them.” 

“Do you want to take his place? We can see how someone fearless should react.” Eric’s voice was low, a challenge. 

“Okay.” My eyes met his as I moved through the crowd and took Al’s spot in front of the target. 

“If you flinch Al takes your place.” Four gave me a hard look and I nodded in agreement but we both knew I wouldn’t flinch. 

I let my eyes linger on Four, but they slowly drifted to Eric as Four let go of the first knife. I didn’t move as it hit the board six inches from my face. 

“You done yet?” Four asked. 

“Do your worst.” I challenged.

 Four smirked and threw another knife, this time hitting above my head. Before anyone could stay anything a third knife sailed through the air and I could feel the sting of the tip against my cheek. I didn’t let the shock show on my face as I reached up and touched the blood that sprung where he had cut me. 

“I would love to stay and see if the rest of you are as daring as she is, but I think that’s enough for today.” Eric said as he approached to clap a hand on my shoulder and squeeze it hard. 

His thumb grazed right under where my cheek continued to bleed as everyone began to pick up their knives and put them away.

 Eric leaned in so only I could hear him.

“You certainly know how to put on a show don’t you. Come see me later, we have something to talk about.” 

I nodded once before he walked away. Everyone was out of the room as I started to pick up my knives. 

“Are you-?”

“I’m fine.”

“That was stupid and you know it.” Four said. 

“And if I hadn’t Tris would have and the last thing either of us want is for Tris to be under Eric’s eye. I’ve been hiding things my whole life, I know how to blend in, Tris barely knows how to keep herself in a higher place on the scoreboard.” 

“You think you’re any safer with Eric watching your every move?” Four raised his voice. 

“He already is!” I turned to face him as my voice rose to match his tone. 

Four’s face went from angry to shocked. 

“You’re not the only one to take an interest in me.” I huffed as I let my feet carry me out of the room. 

I sought out Eric. I was surprised to find him waiting by the entrance to the Pit. He motioned for me to follow him, making it look like we just happened to be going in the same direction. I was less surprised when he led me up several flights of stairs and to the roof. The sun had set the sky on fire, pinks, reds, and golds dancing across the sky. I made my way to the edge of the building and sat with my legs dangling over the ledge.

“What the fuck was that?” Eric demanded. 

“It was a valid question.” 

“Excuse you?” 

“I didn’t stutter.”

“It is my job as a leader and an instructor to weed out the weak.”

“Anyone in their right mind would have flinched.”

“Why didn’t you?” He grabbed my shoulder to turn me to face him before he gripped my chin and forced me to meet his gaze. 

“I knew you wouldn’t let Four hurt me.” 

That made him pause, his anger fading.

“You trust me to protect you.” 

“Yes.”

“I almost hit him when I saw he had cut you.” 

I smiled softly at him. He wasn’t the cold hearted monster that everyone thought he was. His lips were on mine, his kiss was soft, like he was afraid to hurt me after watching me bleed. His hands tangled in my hair as he pulled me in his body. When Eric pulled away I let him keep the gentle hold he had on my waist while I watched the sky behind him begin to darken. He turned so that my back was against his chest as he stood behind me, supporting me while we watched the sun finish setting. 

“Roe. I will always protect you. Promise me that you’ll never forget that..” He whispered in my ear. 

He pulled me back to stand on the roof before he released me from his arms. He held the door open for me before he followed me inside. Once we hit a main hallway I made my way alone through the tunnels to my bed, which I collapsed onto without a second thought.

Chapter Text

I woke early the next day and took the time to properly stretch and warm up before the last day of fighting. I knew that Peter was most likely going to be my opponent, and I knew that I was going to place above him by the end of the day, I had something to prove. When the fights were announced no one was surprised that my name was next to Peters. When we entered the ring he smiled at me. Not his usual smirk but a genuine smile, like he had been waiting for this. He swung first, an easy hit to dodge. I swiped at his knees and sent him tumbling to the ground. I pinned him to the ground alternating hits so that he never knew where my next hit was coming from. He managed to throw me off and return the favor. I would have a black eye and my lip was busted but I was ready for him when he came at me again. We fought longer than almost anyone else had, dancing around each other as we looked for signs of weakness to take advantage of. Finally I found one and left Peter passed out cold on the floor. 

I was putting ice on my eye when Tris took up her place in the ring with Molly. I watched as Four had to pull Tris away from Molly as she kicked her repeatedly once she managed to get her on the ground. He looked alarmed as he watched her walk off. I had known that she had had it in her, she had a lot of anger that she had stored up and the blood lust was easy to see in her eyes when she had entered the ring. I moved to the other half of the room where the Dauntless born were fighting each other and plopped down next to Uriah. 

“You guys already done?” He asked as he turned his head to acknowledge me. 

“I am, I didn’t feel like watching the rest of them fight. It’s not super interesting when they haven’t gotten any better.” I shrugged. 

The Dauntless born were more interesting to watch. They had been raised to fight, this was something they excelled at. It was like watching Orion and Eric fight. 

“Is that what it looks like when I fight?” I asked as I watched Lynn take down an opponent twice her size. 

“Kind of. You’re better at it. More graceful, like you’re dancing.” Uriah replied. 

I waited with him until the rest were done and dismissed for dinner. We moved as a pack through the halls, joking and shoving each other the way I had always seen them do in the hallways at school and moving through the city. We ate with the other Dauntless born until the chatter died down at the mention of Visiting Day. They all shot me a look of sympathy. They didn’t know that I had family here, or that my grandfather had originally been one of them. I brushed off their worries as I joked about them being stuck with their families meddling in their business. Finally I made my way to my bed and plopped face down on my pillow. I hadn’t realized how hard it would be to have to face my parents again. 

When I woke up I laid in bed for a few extra moments as everyone shuffled around quietly getting dressed. I headed to the showers and let the water wash over me, the thought of having to face my antiviolence mother causing a bubble of anxiety to form in my stomach. I wrapped my towel around myself and headed back to my bunk, my footsteps leaving little stains of water on the ground.. The sound of doors slamming open caught my attention long enough for me to see Eric standing in the front of the room. I turned my back to him as I pulled on underwear under my towel. I let the towel fall as I pulled on my bra and quickly pulled a tank top over it, I could feel his eyes lingering on my back as I moved and for some reason it caused me to slow down just enough to give him a little more of a show. I turned to face him, his gaze lingering on me as he waited for the others to give him the attention he was waiting for. 

“Attention! I want to give you some advice about today, if by some miracle your family does come to visit you, which I doubt. It’s best to not seem too attached. That will make it easier for you and easier for them. We also take the phrase ‘faction before blood’ very seriously here. Attachment to your family suggests you aren’t pleased with your faction, which would be shameful. Understood?” 

Eric wanted us to embody Faction before Blood. I rolled my eyes. 

Once my hair was dry and styled into curly half french braids, I allowed myself a little extra time to use the eyeliner that Christina had convinced me to buy before I headed to the Pit. When I entered I immediately caught sight of Will with his sister, Peter with his parents who looked nothing like him, Christina with her mother and sister, and Tris with her mom. I didn’t have to look too hard to find my family, Orion was standing in front of my father, glaring daggers at him. 

“Roe.” My mother called when she caught sight of me. 

“What’s all this?” I asked. 

“Just catching up.” My father huffed out. 

“You’re staring daggers at your brother, seems like a little more than that to me.”

“So you’ve met?” 

“Of course, she has the attention of one of our leaders.” 

“Keep on his good side,” My mom hissed. “You never know when you might need a little help.” 

“He’s not the only one enamored with her, she’ll be fine. I’m here.”

“You better take care of my daughter.” The threat was there in my father’s voice.  

“You think I wouldn’t protect my only family?” 

“I would hope you consider her family.” 

“Alright enough, we came here to see how Roe was doing, this is our only chance to see her. Stop wasting it on a pissing match because you’re mad at each other.” My mother tossed a dirty look at both my father and my uncle. 

My father turned to me and pulled me into a hug, one that I happily returned. Eric could be as pissy as he wanted if he caught me enjoying the affection from my parents. Dauntless was lonely compared to the amount of affection I got growing up. Physical touch was definitely one of my love languages and once I was officially part of Dauntless I was going to make sure it became a more common thing. I let my eyes wander as my parents hugged me and I caught Eric and Four watching me. I rolled my eyes at both of them before pulling myself out of their arms.

“Your Amity is showing.” Christina teased from where she stood with her family. 

“So is your Candor.” I smiled at her.

Our families joined to chat with each other, Orion had walked off as soon as he could to escape prying eyes. I wasn’t surprised that my parents got along well with the other families that had shown up. Even Peter’s parents had stopped by to say hello. He had apparently told them that I was better than him and they had wanted to meet the girl who had humbled their son. When it was finally time for them to go I hugged them both tightly, unwilling to let go of the warmth they provided in my life just yet. Once they were out of the compound I rushed to the roof and watched their small colorful bodies make their way back to Amity. I stayed until I finally lost sight of them. As I turned to head to dinner I was surprised to find Four standing by the door. 

“For someone who has done so well during initiation I’m surprised to see how hard it was for you to watch your parents leave.”

“I’m closer with my parents than most children. I grew up with more love than I knew what to do with. It’s cold and lonely here compared to the light and love I had growing up, but I was destined for better things than what Amity could offer.”

“So you came to Dauntless, but it seems you might not be full Dauntless like everyone thought.”

“There are things missing in Dauntless.”

“Like what?”

“Affection.” I smiled at him. 

“Affection?”

“Physical touch is one of my love languages, there isn’t a whole lot of it here besides beating each other up.”

“And you need affection?”

“Yes.”

“I can offer you that.” Four said softly. 

“Oh yea?”

“Of course.”

Four stepped closer and pulled me into his chest, wrapping an arm around my waist and stroking my face with his fingers. He tipped my chin just enough to press his lips to mine. His kiss was soft and sweet, adding to the warmth that my parents had left. 

I stayed on the roof with Four for longer than I should have, he was warm and something about the way he kissed me felt familiar. I made my way to dinner with a small smile on my face. Uriah stuck his arm in the air to catch my attention when I entered the room. It was easy to fall into the jokes and typical Dauntless behavior with him, especially when his brother was around. He scooted over to make room for me, I looked up once I was seated next to him to find Orion and Eric’s eyes on me from across the room where they were both perched watching the room like enforcers. I ignored the heavy gaze to the best of my ability. It was hard when there were so many questions left over from the weird interaction that my father and uncle had had. When dinner was done, I parted from my friends with hugs as we left to see the rankings that hung in our respective dorm rooms. 

Four stood in the back of the with the blackboard resting against his leg facing away from us. He had already started talking as I managed to slide into the back of the group. 

“For those of you who just came in, I was explaining how the ranks are determined. After the first round of fights we ranked you according to your skill level. The number of points you earn depends on your skill level and the skill level of the person you beat. You earn more points for improving and more points for beating someone of a high skill level. I don’t reward preying on the weak. That’s cowardice. If you have a high rank, you lose points for losing to a low ranked opponent. Stage two of training is weighted more than stage one, because it is more closely tied to overcoming cowardice. That being said, it’s extremely difficult to rank high at the end of initiation if you rank low in stage one.” 

He looked around the group. Taking in each of us. 

“We will announce the cuts tomorrow. The fact that you are transfers and the Dauntless born initiates are not will not be taken into consideration. Four of you will be factionless and none of them. Or four of them and none of you, or any combination thereof. That said, here are your ranks.” 

He flipped the board. 

1. Edward
2. Roe
3. Peter
4. Will
5. Christina
6. Tris
7. Molly
8. Drew
9. Al
10. Myra

The room was quiet as we all took in the rankings. It was silent for only a moment before Molly began screeching. 

“What?” She demanded. “I beat her! I beat her in minutes and she ranked above me?” She pointed at Christina. 

“Yea. And?” Christina smirked at her. 

“If you intend to secure yourself a high rank, I suggest you don’t make a habit of losing to low ranked opponents.” Four’s voice cut through the other grumbles of the initiates. 

He pocketed his chalk and hung the board back up before walking out of the room. 

“You.” Molly pointed at Tris. “You are going to pay for this.” She said before storming out of the dorms. 

I was settled in Tori’s chair with her needle beating into the skin of my back. She was working on a delicate tattoo, a twisted version of each symbol for the five factions. A delicate tree at the top in the middle of my shoulder blades followed by a swirling flame for Dauntless, a singular hand styled after an old religious symbol for Abnegation, an eye for Erudite but also in the old style of an evil eye Tori called it, finally at the middle of my back was the a set of scales that looked almost like the sun and its rays to represent Candor. 

By the time Tori was done the other initiates were in bed. I crept into the dark room making it to my bed without waking anyone. I had just stripped down and slipped under the sheets when I heard the shuffling of feet. The sound of a heavy thump and a blood curdling scream had me shooting  up and throwing my blankets off as my eyes searched for the sound. They landed on a dark lump a few bunks away, then another scream from someone next to the lump.

“Someone turn on the lights!” Someone shouted as the room erupted into chaos. 

I was thankful that I had stripped out of my clothes as I shuffled over towards the sound in my panties and a tank top. I would have been the first suspect if I had been caught with my clothes on. 

When the lights switched on Tris was standing next to me and we were staring at Edward who had his hand cupping his face. There was blood everywhere, and where his eye should have been, was the silver handle of a knife. Myra screamed again, someone else started to scream and as the room grew louder there were calls for help. Tris and I knelt down next to Edward, someone had thrown up and the smell was beginning to permeate the air. 

“Lie still.” Tris tried to calm Edward.

“Edward, you need to stop moving, it’ll only make it worse.” I rested a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to keep him still.

“My eye!” He screamed. “Take it out! Get it out! Get it out of me!” 

He screamed over the chaos of the other initiates. 

“You have to leave it in. If you try and take it out now it’ll only do more damage.” I tried to reason with him.

“Let the doctor take it out and breathe.” Tris said beside me. 

“It hurts.” He sobbed. 

“I know, I know.” Tris and I cooed in an attempt to sound comforting.

 I stroked his head until the nurse arrived and motioned for Tris and I to step back. Tris’s hands and knees were covered in blood while I had my hands, knees, and feet covered. I looked around the room and there were two faces missing, Peter and Molly. I moved towards the bathroom and began to scrub my legs. 

“You know who did that right?” Christina asked.

She had followed Tris who had followed me when she had confirmed that Edward was getting treated.  She stood by the shower door to make sure Tris had some privacy. Tris nodded but I wasn’t sure we were all on the same page. I didn’t answer, I didn’t want to assume but I also didn’t want to group myself into their conspiracy theory group. 

“Should we tell someone?” Christina asked again. 

“You really think the Dauntless would do anything? Eric hung you over the Chasm. Our first stage of initiation was to beat each other up.” Tris said her tone filled with a little venom. 

They left the bathroom with arms full of paper towels and tried to scrub the blood out off the floor. None of us slept that night. I joined the others to sit on their beds as we tried to keep our minds off of what had happened.

Chapter Text

I managed to nap for a few hours while the others had been keeping watch. By the time I woke up everyone had left the dorms. I made my way to the shower, I hated the lingering smell of blood on my skin. I made my way towards my bed and pulled some clothes out. I had managed to pull a cropped tank top over my bra and a pair of panties on before Peter burst through the doors. His clothes were covered in blood and his face was beginning to bruise.  

“You needed to be in the top two so bad you hurt him?” I asked him. 

“Who said I did it?!” Peter shouted. 

He closed the gap between us in seconds. 

“You and Molly were missing after it happened.” I stated matter of factly.

“So that automatically means it was me?” 

I opened my mouth to respond but realized that I couldn’t. He was right, it didn’t mean that he had done anything. 

“I might be violent but I don’t want a spot I had to get by cheating.” Peter said in a softer voice. 

“With Edward gone we all go up a spot.”

“And I wouldn’t be in the top spot. You’re number one now. What motivation do I have for it?” 

“You’re right.” I admitted.

“Just because your little friends think I did it doesn’t mean they're always right, if you want an answer, ask.” His eyes flashed in anger. 

“I have your confidence now?” I asked him. 

“If you want it.” 

“Go get cleaned up.” I dismissed him.

Peter started stripping off his clothes as he made his way to the showers. My eyes followed his movements and I took a moment to appreciate the way the muscles in his back moved as he tossed his shirt into the trash. 

“I can feel your eyes.” Peter called.

I turned my face away as the heat reached my cheeks.  

“I don’t mind if you look!” He shouted from the shower.

“You can’t be serious Peter.”

“Just being honest, pretty girl.” He called. 

I groaned loudly as I heard the shower shut off. 

I didn’t wait for him to come out before I tossed my towel with the other dirty ones and escaped from his flirting through the doors and into the hallway. I found myself wondering about the compound, desperate to find something to distract my mind. Finally I found myself sitting on the edge of the Chasm. I let the droplets splash against my bare feet as I found comfort in the sound of moving water. It was the closest to home that I could get in Dauntless besides sitting on the roof, and I knew two men that would look for me here or the roof  if I were to go missing. When I felt better I allowed myself one last deep breath before I made my way back. I arrived back in the dorms to find Edward and Myra’s bunks were stripped bare and their drawers were empty. 

“They quit?” I asked Tris and Christina. 

They nodded.

“Two Dauntless born were cut.” Christina informed me. 

The blackboard had lines through Edward and Myra’s names and like I had predicted everyone had a new number next to their name. 

I was first.

That afternoon I found myself seeking the company of my Dauntless born friends. It was easy for them to keep my spirits high and with Edward gone I now had a target on my back. Whoever had gone after him wanted to move up in the ranks and I was the next one to eliminate. I was pleased to find Uriah, Lynn, and Marlene headed in my direction as I moved through the tunnels of the Dauntless compound.

“Just who we were looking for, Ms. Number 1!” Uriah shouted as he threw his arm around my shoulders and ruffled my hair.

“What’s got you so hyped up?” I laughed with him

“You’ll see, come on we don’t want to be late.” 

I followed after the three, as we wove through tunnels I wasn’t sure I had ever been down before. As we grew closer to our destination we stumbled on Tris, sitting alone on the floor.  

“Tris?” Uriah asked. She looked up at him. “You okay?”

“We had a difficult night.” She said as she shot a glance at me. 

“Yea I heard about that guy Edward. Want to get out of here?” He asked, wiggling his eyebrows at her.  

Tris remained on the floor.

“Where are you going?” She asked. 

“To a little initiation ritual, come on, we have to hurry.” He grabbed her arm and pulled her up as he began moving down the hall. 

Marlene and Lynn had already rounded the corner. I was steps behind them. Tris and Uriah had to jog in order to catch up with us. 

“The only initiates they usually let come are the ones with older siblings in Dauntless, but they may not even notice, just act like you belong.” 

“What exactly are we doing?” Tris asked. 

“Something dangerous.” Uriahs’s eyes gleamed with mischief. 

We slipped into the group and I stuck close to my friends.

“What’s the Stiff doing here?” a guy called out. 

“She just saw that guy get stabbed in the eye, Gabe, give her a break okay?” Uriah was quick to defend Tris. 

I watched as the Dauntless born sized Tris up but no one said anything else. No one seemed to mind that I was there, in their minds I was basically one of them already. When we turned another corner there was a group of Dauntless members waiting for us. It was obvious who was related by looking at the faces but their group was too big to just be siblings.

“Let’s go!” Someone shouted and we moved as a group through a dark doorway.

 I had enough sense to reach my hand out to the side as I felt a railing and assumed that we were using a staircase that was usually off limits. The daylight lit the stairs in front of us the closer we got to the top, and once I was outside I could see that we had come out near the top of the glass building on top of the Pit. Close to the train tracks. We jogged as a pack alongside the train cars, and piled into the train car in waves. I was the first into the car amongst my friends and I helped pull Uriah into the car and he helped Tris. They huddled against a wall while I sat next to them in an open door. Zeke, who I had met in passing, had taken the small amount of space available next to me and kept faking a fall so I would try and grab him. Shauna, who had made a point to meet me after our team had won capture the flag, nudged me with her foot lightly as Zeke and I sat in the doorway. I got up when she tilted her head to indicate it was time to get up.

“Here we go!” She shouted before she pushed us aside and jumped out. 

I wasted no time following her. 

We waited for everyone to get off the train, and began our walk. I realized quickly that we were headed to the empty Hancock building, which was a dark pillar against the setting sun. As Shauna and Zeke began to jog, I matched their pace. Uriah had done the gentlemanly thing and stuck with Tris. The broken glass of one of the doors crunched under our feet as we all gathered near the elevator bank. 

“Do the elevators work?” Tris asked as they caught up to us. 

“Of course they do.” Zeke responded. “You think I’m stupid enough not to come here early and turn on the emergency generator?”

“Yea, I kinda do.” Uriah and I said as we playfully shoved Zeke. 

Zeke grabbed at us and caught Uriah, and despite the height difference managed to get Uriah in a headlock and rub his knuckles over his head. When the doors opened the members got into one and directed us initiates into another. Lynn stepped on Tris’s foot and said nothing as the doors closed. 

“What floor?” She asked, looking at Uriah. 

“One hundred.” Tris answered. 

“How would you know that?” Lynn snapped at her. 

“Lynn, be nice.” Uriah shot her a look. 

“One hundred floor abandoned building with Dauntless, kinda makes sense yea?” I asked Lynn, she shot me a look, one that was a mix of annoyance and acknowledgment, before she hit the button. 

“Why don’t you know that?” Tris sneered. 

I elbowed her gently and shot her a look, we were guests in this adventure and the last thing I wanted was for her to ruin my friendships. 

The elevator was faster than the stairs and the speed had my stomach dropping. Once we got to the top we were met with a cold breeze through a hole in the ceiling of the top floor. Zeke had already taken the initiative to grab a ladder and prop it up so that we could all climb to the roof. Zeke held the ladder so that it was more stable for everyone who came after him. All of my senses besides my sight had been taken over by the power of the wind and I turned around to find a thick steel cable with slings big enough to hold a person sitting under it. I grinned. Shauna was the first to go, she settled on her stomach and Zeke strapped her in before dragging her over to the edge. She gave a thumbs up when Zeke finished his count down and he shoved her off the edge of the building. People whoop and pumped their fists as they formed a line, I was quick to be the first initiate in line, Tris behind me and Uriah behind her. Six people were in front of me and I was itching to get in a sling. Each member in front of me chose a different way to go down. Once I’m strapped in, Zeke ruffled my hair and grinned.

“Welcome to the club.” He said.  

He pulled me back and then shoved me forward. 

My eyes teared up as the wind took over my senses again and I let my arms spread out on either side of my body as I gained speed. I laughed as the city blurred under me, the shadows of Dauntless members pumping their fists below me caught my attention as I shouted in joy. The ground grew bigger and bigger, and eventually I was only twenty feet above the ground pulling at the straps as the members that had already landed formed a human net to catch me as I fell from the line. I could feel the grin on my face as I felt my feet hit the ground. 

“How was it?” Shauna asked. 

“Can I go again?” I asked as the members around us all laughed and grinned along with me as we waited for Tris to reach us. 

Tris dropped down into the group and everyone waited for her answer as Shauna asked her how she felt. 

“Guess we can’t call you Stiff anymore.” Shauna teased Tris.

Someone pointed out Uriah’s approaching body as he let out a blood curdling scream. We all laughed as everyone made some jokes at his expense. Someone compared his scream to that of a dying cat.

When we made our way into the cafeteria Tris and I still smelled like the wind, and though we had fixed our hair it was clear that we had done something wild. Shauna waved goodbye to Tris as I followed her towards the table that Uriah and Zeke had claimed for us. Tris still ate with her friends, preferring their company over the Dauntless born. The group at my table had taken to flicking food at each other and I caught sight of Tris staring longingly at the empty spot next to me. I watched Will talking with his hands, and Christina was all but glaring at me. I wasn’t sure if she was jealous but it was obvious that she was seeing me as less of a friend and more of a rival. I felt a heavier gaze on me and turned my body to find Orion staring at the way that Uriah had his arm resting close to my thigh. I rolled my eyes at him and turned back to my friends. 

When I stepped out into the tunnels with the intention of returning to my dorm I felt a large hand wrap around my upper arm. I was pulled into one of the alcoves that the tunnels were filled with. Eric’s face greeted me when my eyes adjusted to the dark. 

“What gives?” I asked as I pulled my arm out of his grasp. 

He didn’t say anything, simply pulled me into his chest and held me. I melted into the hug, something I had been missing. We stood there, his arms keeping me safe and hidden from any prying eyes as halls filled with the chatter of the initiates and other members. I had no idea how long we stood there but I had completely relaxed against his muscular chest. He pulled away slightly and looked down at my blissful face, he kissed my forehead lightly and finally let me go.

“I heard that you need some physical affection from time to time.” He said quietly. 

I nodded in response. 

“Come to me.”

“What?”

“Come to me when you need it.” He looked away before he mumbled the second part. “I don’t like watching other guys putting their hands on you.”

“Is the big bad Eric jealous?” I teased quietly. 

He turned to face me again, his eyes flashing. 

“No, I’m possessive.” He whispered before his lips captured mine. 

His kiss was dominating, his lips soft and warm as he pressed me into the wall behind me, his hands falling to my thighs and lifting me. When he pulled away to take a breath I took the time to study his face. Eric’s features had softened as his eyes traced my face, every inch of him that had seemed cold and distant the first time we met had suddenly vanished and before me was the man under the facade. I smiled at him softly and he placed me back on the ground. 

“Remember what I said.” His gaze was serious before he left me alone in the alcove.

When I woke the next morning it was with the realization that it was the first day of the second round of initiation. I was too jittery to go back to sleep so I followed the familiar path to the training room. Four was waiting for me, he didn’t say anything, just watched me carefully as I warmed up and swung at the punching bag. He was showing silent support, making sure there was no possible way that anyone could cry favoritism. When I was done he followed me silently to breakfast. He made the effort to walk close enough in the tunnels that when there was no camera, or there was a gap in the lights he would brush my hand with his and squeeze it lightly. He sat across from me at breakfast and brushed his knee against mine as often as he could. He was making good on trying to give me more physical affection. Finally we parted ways and I made my way back to the dorm to shower. I didn’t want to stink for this round of initiation, I had spent the entire first round of initiation covered in sweat most days.

Since this stage of initiation wasn’t physical I took the time to make myself more presentable. I let my hair down, pulling part of it up into a messy bun and indulging in a little eyeliner. We gathered in a dark hallway, all the initiates together. At the end of the hallway was a door, no explanation was given, just a simple order to sit and wait. I sat on one side of the hallway with the other transfers next to Tris while Uriah sat across from us with Lynn on one side and Marlene on the other. 

“So which one of you is ranked first?” Lynn asked. 

“Me.” I answered. 

“Whose second?” She asked. 

“Me.” Peter answered.

“I bet I could take you.” She looked Peter up and down. “I’m second but I bet any of us could take you, Transfer.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, if I were you. Which one of you is first?” Peter looked down the line of Dauntless born. 

“Uriah. I am sure, do you know how long we’ve spent preparing for this?” 

Peter didn’t get a chance to respond before Four opened the door and called Lynn into the room. Once she was gone Will turned to look at Uriah. 

“So you’re first?”

“Yea, and?” 

“Nothing really. Stage one was about skill, sure but no one can prepare for stage two, or so I’m told.” 

Uriah shrugged. 

The conversation ended there and the silence was deafening, it carried on until the door opened and Four called out for Peter. We stayed silent as each person got called away and they didn’t come back. Finally it was just Tris, Drew, Uriah and I. The sound of silence was overwhelming at the end of the hallway and Tris had whispered to me that she thought it was a scare tactic. When the door opened all four of us turned to see who Four would call in next. 

“Roe.” 

I got up, my back ached and my knees were stiff. When I made it into the room I almost recoiled, in the room was a reclining metal chair like the one that I had sat in during my aptitude test. 

“So what simulation do I get to go through this time?”

“You get to face your fears. The simulation will only let you go once you have calmed your heart rate.” Four muttered as he gave me a light push forward. 

I settled in the chair as Four brushed the hair away from my neck. 

“This might hurt a bit.” He warned me as I felt the tip of a needle touch my neck before he pushed the needle into my skin. 

When he pulled it away he kissed my forehead and guided my head to the headrest as my eyes closed. 

“Be brave Roe, the first time is the hardest but I’m right here, I’m with you through the whole thing.” 

He rubbed a hand soothingly through my hair and I felt the throws of fear pull me under. 

When I opened my eyes it was not the room with the chair that was sitting in front of me. Instead I was met with a dark empty room, for a moment I was confused until I felt the low rumble of thunder. I had spent my whole life trying to get over my fear of storms after I had almost been struck by lightning when gathering apples. I closed my eyes tightly and began to hum to myself, some lullaby that my mother had sung to me until I had told her I was too old to be sung to sleep. I felt the world move around me but instead of coming out of the simulation I found myself in another one. I was standing by the train tracks in Amity, in front of me stood my father, his foot wedge in the tracks. I rushed forward, somehow knowing that the train was coming and I only had a short time to save him. I knew it was silly, the part of the tracks that we were at was where the train  chugged by slowly but in this fear it was rapidly approaching. I struggled to pull my father free but at the last moment my father pushed me out of the way, sacrificing himself. 

When the world spun around me again I was thrilled that I was back in the metal chair this time, with Four grasping my hand. 

“Hey, how are you feeling?” He asked as he pushed my bangs away from my eyes. 

“That was- it was something.” I murmured.

“I was surprised that you went through two fears instead of one like everyone else.”

“How long was I in there?”

“A minute or so. Faster than anyone else.” I nodded my head. “It’s not a bad thing, you seem to be able to come out of it pretty quickly. I think the simulation was confused when there was no reaction with the first one so it forced another.”

“Spent a lot of time trying to get over the first one.” Four nodded his head in understanding. “What was your first?”

“It was a person, someone that I had struggled to stand up to my entire life. I may never face that person again but at least I know I can.”

“You left your faction to protect yourself. Or did you leave so that you could protect others from people like the person who haunts you?” 

Four was silent. The look of shock on his face told me everything I needed to know. 

“How did you-?” 

“You’re not as hard to read as you think you are Four. You push Tris harder than anyone else, but you are also very affectionate with me. You think you move in the shadows but you don’t. You have so much love to give but you are so scared to become like that person.Your Abnegation is showing.” 

“How?” He asked, his voice weaker than it normally was. 

“You’re selfless, in everything you do. You don’t want to watch us fail. You’re risking your position in order to make sure I get everything I need. You might have everyone else fooled, but not me.” I shifted off the chair. “I should go.” I headed to the other door in the room. 

“We should talk about this.”

“Find me when you’re ready.” I turned to face him. 

“No more secrets.” His mask had fallen back in place.

“Who said I had secrets?” I shot him a smirk as I pulled open the door and disappeared into the hallway.

I made my way back to the dorm but hesitated. I wasn’t really friends with Christina and Will, and Uriah was still waiting for his turn in the simulation. I decided that the best course of action was to wait. I needed to keep myself in a good light when it came to the leaders. I needed to stay on top, and that meant that I had to keep distance between Tris and myself. She was calling attention to herself in a way that was hard to ignore in the dorms and soon it would be hard for the leaders to miss too. I didn’t wait long for Tris, Four was with her and they were chatting lightly. I shifted into a shadow so that I wouldn’t interrupt their conversation. When Four walked away after telling Tris she looked tough as nails I stepped up to her. 

“Hey did you just get back?” I asked as if I hadn’t been standing outside the door lost in my thoughts. 

“Was that Four?” I smiled and wiggled my eyebrows at her. 

She turned red and rolled her eyes at me. 

“It’s nothing, I was a little worked up and he wanted to make sure I got back okay.” 

“Well let’s go see how the others are feeling?” I asked. 

She smiled and nodded.

When we walked into the room Peter was standing among the other initiates as he read from a paper in his hands. 

“The mass exodus of the children of Abnegation leaders cannot be ignored or attributed to coincidence. The recent transfer of Beatrice and Caleb Prior, the children of Andrew Prior, calls into question the soundness of Abnegation’s values and teachings.” I felt Tris stiffen next to me. Christina turned and caught sight of us, her face reflected the worry I felt but not the annoyance. 

“Why else would the children of such an important man decide that the lifestyle he has set out for them is not an admirable one? Molly Atwood, a fellow Dauntless transfer, suggests a disturbed and abusive upbringing might be to blame. ‘I heard her talking in her sleep once,’ Molly says, ‘asking her father to stop doing something. I don’t know what it was, but it gave her nightmares.”

Molly had promised revenge and this was how she intended to dish it out. She had talked to a reporter. I clenched my jaw but Tris was speaking before I could react. 

“What?” She cleared her throat. “What?” She asked again as Molly smirked at her. 

Tris leapt for Molly. 

“You bitch.” Tris growled at Molly as I tried to pull Tris off of her. She grunted as she took the blows. 

“Roe get Tris off her!” Peter was right in my ear, his arms around my waist trying to pull me and Tris off Molly. I was pulled off of Tris by Peter who walked me out of the dorm and pinned me against the wall once we were in the hall.

“Were you even trying to help Roe?” His voice was noticeably softer than it usually was. “Molly could have been really hurt.”

“Of course I was trying to help Peter! What the fuck do you think I was doing? Have you ever seen me fight someone outside of training?” I shouted and I watched guilt cross Peter’s face. 

“You’re right, I panicked. I’m sorry.”

“I used to be Amity. All about peace, love, and harmony, remember?” Peter just stared at me for a moment before he nodded. 

“I get it.” I rolled my eyes at him.

Will pulled Tris from the room. 

Peter moved away from me and shoved back into the dorms. 

“Calm down.” Will said as Tris struggled against him. 

“Calm down? That’s my family they're talking about. My faction!” 

“No it’s not!” Will looked tired. It was easy to see it written on his face. “It’s your old faction and there is nothing true about what they say, so you might as well just ignore it.” 

“Are you even listening?” Tris argued. “Your stupid ex faction isn’t just insulting Abnegation anymore, they’re calling for an overthrow of the entire government.”

“No they’re not. They’re arrogant and dull, that’s why I left them. But they aren’t revolutionaries. They just want more say, that’s all, and they resent Abnegation for refusing to listen to them.” Will tried to calm Tris down. 

“She isn’t wrong, it's still a bold move to post it in a paper that circulates everywhere. They post those types of opinions and then people begin to question Abnegation’s ability to govern justly. Be reasonable Will, they are a threat even if you don’t want to believe it.” I rested my hand on his shoulder. 

“You don’t know that, it’s just their way of expressing their upset.” Will shook his head and gave a light chuckle.

“Don’t brush it off Will, there is a reason so much knowledge was lost when the wall went up.” I shrugged.

Residual annoyance fueled my pace as I moved through the compound, such high tensions in such a small space had always sent me fleeing to find fresh air and space to collect myself. I found myself in the training room. It was empty and I wasted no time approaching a punching bag and releasing all of the leftover emotions from the dorms on the bag. The sound of clapping brought my attention to the group of Dauntless that Eric tolerated. Orion sat among them.

“Haven't had enough of the first round of initiation?” Eric teased. 

“Say the instructor that never seems to keep up with his training.” I snarked back, the challenge clear in my voice. 

The group had seen me fight before but this was different. Eric’s eyes darkened at the challenge, but it was the same look he had given me when he had kissed me for the first time. He wasn’t angry, he was turned on. 

“Is it my turn to fight you finally?” He asked as he gestured towards the mat. 

I smirked as I made my way over to the ring making quick work securing my hair out of my face. Eric joined me at the ring and we both removed our shoes before stepping in. 

“You know, I’m kind of looking forward to this. Ever since I watched you fight Orion.” Eric mused.

“Ready?” One of his friends called and we both nodded. 

Eric took up a fighting stance across from me and I took the moment to try and figure out his tell. I had a moment to breathe before he was on me, throwing punches almost faster than I could see. Eric had the advantage in strength, weight, and height but I was faster. I dodged his fists while trying to strike back. I danced around him as he grabbed for me, I got him in the back of the knee and pinned him under me. He had no choice but to block the blows to his face as he tried to buck me off his body. I misjudged the momentum in his hips and it wasn’t long before we were both crouched on the ground smirking at each other. 

“You’re beautiful when you fight.” Eric grinned at me as he launched towards me and I barely managed to roll out of the way. 

We played cat and mouse, exchanging the occasional blow until Eric managed to grab my ankle and drag me under his body. With one leg wedged between mine and a hand holding my wrists above my head I had no choice but to tap out as he held me too tightly to escape. 

“Damn Coulter, she really gave you a run for your money.” One of his friends shouted after Eric had released me. 

“I can’t imagine what she would be like if she hadn’t spent so much energy on the punching bags.” Eric admitted. 

I laid on the floor panting as Eric shifted away from me and back to his friends. I could hear their voices fading as they began to exit the training room, with one set of steps pausing. 

“You should be proud of yourself.” Eric said as he stood over me again. “With another year of training you’d be as hard to beat as I am. I’m proud of you.” The smile on his face was genuine and I felt butterflies explode in my stomach. 

I turned my head to watch them leave only to find Orion crouched leaning against a pole. I sat up and turned to face him, legs crossed. 

“We should talk.” He said. 

He walked towards me and offered me a hand. I took it and he pulled me up. I followed behind him, there was enough distance between us that it wasn’t obvious. He led me to a part of the compound that I had never explored before, the residences. He stopped in front of a door and looked both ways before unlocking it and ushering me in. Once inside he locked the door behind him. 

“What did you want to talk about?”

“I saw your first test. Every leader did. We’ve been instructed to look for discrepancies.”

“Like those who had an unusually fast time.” I mumbled. 

“It’s a marker for something we call Divergent.”

“Is it bad?”

“Some of those in power seem to think it is.”

“Some?” My eyes locked with his. 

“My father is Divergent. So is your father. I am too. We thought it passed through the men but when you chose Dauntless we knew that you had gotten it too.”

“I know.” 

“You know?” 

“I thought it was the way I had been raised. To be a little Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Erudite, and Dauntless. To be the best of every faction.” 

I watched Orion’s face soften as he looked at me, really looked at me for the first time. 

“I wish it was just that.”

“Why are you telling me all of this?”

“Erudite and Dauntless are planning an attack on Abnegation, they seem to have the largest number of Divergent and Jeanine wants to be in power. I know you’ll be offered the position of leader when you finish initiation and I need you to take it so that I can protect you. You will be put in a position of having to keep your mouth shut about some terrible things but you will be one of the youngest and in a few years it will be Eric, You and I left. We can make the right changes to keep people safe.”

“Seems like we have a similar goal in mind.”

“But Eric is from Erudite and I know his loyalty runs deep. But I’ve seen the way he looks at you and I’m hoping that maybe his loyalty might switch.”

“Orion this is a lot.”

“I know but I can’t afford to keep you in the dark anymore. You need to be in the top two, keep your times fast in this stage but not too fast. Find reasonable ways to make it through your fears, not ones that would draw questions.”

“I know.”

“Good. you’ve been gone for too long, I’lll see you later.”   

 I made my way back towards my dorm to shower and found myself crossing the Chasm. When I got there I was surprised to find Four and a group of other members around his age sitting around laughing, I felt a warmth bloom in my stomach seeing him being the carefree eighteen year old that he was. 

“Roe!” He called as he caught sight of me, he stumbled a little bit as he moved quickly to grab my hand and pull me back to his group. 

“So this is what you do in your spare time? Flirt with death?” I teased the group.

“That’s what Dauntless is all about.” Four said as he leaned into me a little more than he should have. 

“Is this the girl?” One of his friends asked. 

“You’ve been talking about me?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at Four. 

“Yea you’re gorgeous and bold.” 

“Well it’s good to know you’re paying attention.” I teased.

“Can you blame me? You move in such a graceful way when you fight and  have so much power in your punches. You have better aim than any other Dauntless I’ve seen. You never miss, I have never seen someone so in their element as you with a weapon in hand perched high in the air on look out.” Four sighed as he started as me, his eyes glittering.

“Sounds like someone has a crush!” Someone shouted as the others whooped. 

Four’s face turned red as he realized what he had said in front of his friends. 

“I’ve seen Eric staring at her too!” Someone else shouted.

“And Orion!” 

“Hell must be freezing over.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked. 

“Four doesn’t date, ever. He has never shown interest in anyone until you showed up. Eric dates but he always has more than one girl, he doesn’t work for anything, and the girls don’t tell him no but they all know that they are a flavor of the week. Until you came along. Haven’t seen anyone going home with him recently.” One of the girls explained. 

“Oh!” I said as I felt warmth spread across my cheeks.

“And Orion has never paid much attention to the initiates before but he seems fascinated with you. But that might be because of Eric’s interest in you. The two of them are close.” 

“Tris!” Four called. “You look different.”  

I turned to see that he was right, she had a shirt on that exposed her shoulders and she was wearing eyeliner. 

“So do you.” she said as she got closer to us, “What are you doing?” 

“Flirting with death.” His voice was tinted with a laugh as he parroted the phrase I had used earlier. “Drinking by the Chasm, probably not a good idea.”  

“No it isn’t.” Tris stated. 

“I didn’t know you had a tattoo.” I watched Four’s gaze catch on her collarbone. “I’d ask you to hang out with us, but you’re not supposed to see me this way.”

“Drunk?” Tris asked. 

“Yea, well no. Real I guess.” He mumbled. 

“We’ll pretend we didn’t.” Tris nudged me and I nodded my head. 

“Nice of you. You look good, Tris.” Four winked at her and I felt something in the pit of my stomach drop. 

Tris laughed at him. 

“Do us a favor and stay away from the Chasm!” I teased. 

“Of course.” Four smirked at us. 

I turned from the Chasm and headed to my dorm. I was still sweaty from my fight with Eric and I was starting to get a little itchy. Tris tried to pull me after her but I waved her away as I sought the cool water of the shower. The dorm was empty when I got there and I stripped out of my dirty clothes and grabbed my towel as I headed towards the shower. It was a bold move to walk naked to the showers from my bunk but I had been lucky enough this entire time to have the shower to myself that I wasn’t worried. The water felt amazing as I scrubbed the grim from my hair and body. 

When I was finished I found myself pulling on a light shirt and tight pants as I let my hair air dry. I wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone after the conversation I had had with my uncle. I made my way to the rooftop. I burst through the door and I was greeted with a strong wind and the sky on fire. I could hear the distant rumble of thunder but I ignored it as the setting sun kissed my skin. I perched on the edge of the roof as I closed my eyes and turned my face to the sky, absorbing every ounce of sunlight that I could. I didn’t open my eyes when the first drops of rain hit my face, the sun was still warm on my skin and I couldn’t be bothered to care about the cold rain. Soon the dark rain clouds took over the sun and I was on the edge of the roof soaking wet as the rain clouds let go. I took a deep breath and opened my eyes to look out over the city. The first flash of lightning had me gripping the edge of the roof frozen with fear. Tears began to prickle in the corner of my eyes and I let out a whimper that was swallowed by the rumble of thunder. 

“ROE!” I heard my name over the constant rumble of the thunder. 

I heard heavy footsteps rushing towards me, and then a set of strong arms wrapped around my waist. I was pulled into someone’s chest and picked up. My whimpers escaped my lips as I was carried off the roof. When the door closed behind us I peaked up slightly. Eric’s neck tattoo was visible and I let my head fall against his chest as I breathed in the lingering scent of leather that he always seemed to have. I kept my eyes closed as he carried me through different hallways.