Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

" Did you just ask to be my pimp ? ! ? " 

* chirp* 

Jecka was staring down Nicole with a look somewhere between shock and disgust . Not even sure why she brought this bitch along to k - mart in the first place . Ok she knew why , having a bad bitch tag along would be better than being alone . The store was mostly empty for the duo . Only kept company by the shitty dad rock quietly droning over the speakers . 

" You didn't even break 90 pounds with that chunk of lead in your leg . Do you seriously think you can keep these creeps off my ass any better than I am right now ? " 

* chirp * 

" Bitch I see you flinch every time your phone goes off . You give me some of that money and the desperate fools will be blowing up my phone instead . " 

" Where did this even come from? You planning on being an entrepreneur when you grow up ? Are you planning on living past 18 now ? ! ? " 

" Just thought it up , probably not , and probably not ... again ." Nicole's trademark deadpan expression not even slightly wavered by the answers she had given . 

" Well ..." Jecka held her stare . The peace of mind would help , 

but Nicole has to have some other motive that her pretty little poker face just won't reveal . " What did you have in mind? " 

" Hmmmm , I 'm thinking 20 % ? Just to be your glorified secretary , do stuff like organize with who , when and where , help set prices . You know be a real P.I.M.P. " 

Jecka was at a loss for words . The idea wasn't great , but she had to admit it was pretty good . Which says a lot seeing as who came up with it . 

* chirp * * chirp* 

Jecka clenches her jaw as her phone attacks her with all business and no pleasure . Having the freedom of getting a personal phone back was tempting . But it's not like she had any other friends that would message her . " ...I 'll think about 

it ." 

*chirp* 

Nicole continues to hold Jecka's stare and gives her a nod and slight smirk . " Suuuure , if you change your mind , you have my number. " 

Jecka gave the brunette a slight chuckle and grin . finally breaking her stare to check the messages that have been piling up . " Yup , I'll get back to you once I deal with all of these losers . But for now , I got some money to make ." 

You would think putting your bare feet on someone for 30 minutes would be the easiest $300 you've ever made . And while you would be right . Actually getting through that 

amount of time is the challenge . Standing there , cheap drink from a mall kiosk in hand pretending to make small talk . She's been doing this for a few weeks . She's uncomfortable , but in a good way . If you ever don't have a sick feeling when stepping on someone's face then something has happened . And it's never good . Her hazel eyes took a quick glance at the clock . 

" 5 more minutes ." She said as unmotivated as possible . 

This was a late booking but the $ 300 will cover all of her expenses for the rest of the week . And after this week only 4 more until she can head out to college . Free from sex work free from her dad . Free from her stupid classmates that always feel the need to try and catchup with small talk . Acting like we didn't just graduate 2 months prior , and did we ever have a real conversation all 4 years we were going to that dogshit school ? 

Jecka polishes off her strawberry lemonade and begins to clear her throat . " Times up ." 

Jeffery takes his time making it to his feet . Wobbles a bit and looks in Jecka's direction . Glasses bathed in a blinding glare 

hiding where he's looking , adding more to his already alien appearance . He begins to open his mouth but Jecka cuts him off . 

" I'm not in the mood for time extensions today! Get out of here ! Now ! " 

Jeffery turns to the door shaking his head in confusion . " Why must such lovely feet have such a foul attitude to go along with them ?" 

" Jeffery shut your mouth already and fuck off !!!! " Even though his back was turned Jecka still felt the need to stare daggers right to his core . 

' Bitch this body is a perfect 10 , and even then my attitude is still more palatable than yours! ' Jecka mused to herself and took a deep breath . Savoring the few seconds of calm before leaving the malls family bathroom stall . The blonde wasn't in a rush to head home , but avoiding going home was her only real reason to stay . 

Jecka knows she has at least 30 minutes before the mall closes , and comes to the conclusion some window shopping might lift her spirits . Hoping to get in a better mood before returning to face her father , she let's out a heavy sigh and begins walking towards the J.C. Penny . Jecka barely starts down the mall's hallway before a splash of red catches her attention . 

" Ari!!! " The blondes voice carries better than it should have causing several other people to stop and look . 

The red head froze in place and slowly turned to face the shout . " Oh , Jecka ? How've you been ? " She looked happy but had a tinge of suspicion about her . 

Jecka flashed her a smile . It's been a while since she had a genuine smile , but this one felt so sincere Jecka wasn't sure of its authenticity herself . " I've been good ... So what brings you here? " Not sure if she was looking for actual 

conversation or just glad she found the opportunity to talk to someone besides her usual fair of creepy men , sociopaths , or some combination of the two . 

" Oh ." Ari does a quick glance between Jecka , the bags in her hand and back to Jecka . " I'm birthday shopping for my mom . She turns 44 in two weeks . My parents are going to Mexico to celebrate , so I'm getting these as a gift before she leaves ." Ari's face was slowly turning a shade of pink as she kept glancing between looking at the bags in her hand , Jecka's face and of course , Jecka's boobs . 

" Oh that's really cool . I'd love to go to Mexico some day ." Jecka pretends not to notice Ari becoming more flustered by the minute . People ogling her is a day to day occurrence , she can tolerate it a bit if she can get a normal human 

conversation out of it . " Hey did you stop dying your hair? | see a bit of blonde starting to come in ." 

Ari finally stopped glancing around . Now deciding to look up at the ceiling In a poor attempt to hide her exposed roots . " Yeah , I'm on the fence about whether I want to go back to natural or keep dying it . What do you think ? " 

" I actually enjoyed the red . It's honestly what caught my eye earlier . Besides in no world do you pull blonde off better than I can . " Jecka ran a hand through her blonde locks and gave another quick smile . 

God , i knew Ari was gay but I didn't think she would be this easy . The opportunity to just bitch or flirt never comes up anymore , Jecka had forgotten how good it feels to just relax . No ulterior motives to avoid , no egg shells to walk over , no creeps that only see you as a pair of legs . Well maybe that last one sort of applies , but it still felt good . Comforting almost . In fact she might just try to make this a regular thing . 

* chirp * 

" Hey , Ari are you free this saturday ? " 

The red head , glanced down and finally holding eye contact gave a surprised gasp " wh - huuuh ? " 

Ari blinked , and then blinked again. "You  mean like ... ? " 

" Like some friends from high school catching up a bit before we go to college . " While Jecka was having fun messing with the thirsty lesbian she needed to draw the line at some point . 

" Is that alright? " 

" Ummm , yeah . No , yeah , that's fine ; let me see if I still have your number... " 

As she began to search the contacts on her phone her face grew a vibrant crimson . If Jecka had just met her looking like that she would assume it was the flu . Puzzled she took out her own phone and looked to see if Ari was saved in her contacts . After some quick looking she saw it . All of it . EVERYTHING . It was the one and only message Ari had sent her nearly 9 months ago , after Nicole had turned down the red heads confession . 

Jecka wouldn't consider herself gay , bi - curious at best . But Ari had a really good body . And with the amount of redtube Jecka watches , she knows what hot people look like naked . Ari was hot . Not super hot or anything , but hot regardless . 

Jecka did a quick cough to help break the tension . She knew blush was visible on her own face but it wasn't nearly as bad as Ari's probably was . It was hard to tell since she was now staring straight at her shoes , avoiding even a side glance towards Jecka . 

" Anyway, I found your number. If you want to go some place in particular just message me where . I'm free all afternoon so , don't be shy , ok? " 

*chirp* 

" Y - yeah , I'll message you later tonight ..." 

" Well I got a bit of shopping to do , I'll see you Saturday ." 

Ari was beaming , flashing the most genuine smile she had ever seen , before saying her own goodbyes and continuing on to the parking garage. 

Jecka knew she didn't NEED to buy anything . But maybe a new tank top would lift her spirits enough to make it to Saturday . A fresh pack of cigarettes on the way home would also do wonders . 

* chirp * 

Dreading what she will see Jecka checked her phone . Only one dick pic , less than she expected but still more than she wanted . She breathed out slowly trying to act calm . At least they don't try to whip it out while I'm stepping on them , right ? RIGHT!?! 

You know the term ' deer in the headlights ' ? You know the car is coming , you don't even need to be facing it . It will cast shadows that will linger with you as long as its there . You know it's on its way , but you just can't convince yourself to run away . You are aware it will hit you . You know it can kill you . It could happen two seconds from when you see those 

headlights or two weeks . It could even be months down the line . All you know is it will hit you ... Well , that's what my dad is like . 

Jecka was finishing off a cigarette just sitting in her car 

in front of her dads house . She had smoked two more on the drive home . She could have finished the whole pack . The blonde knew smoking wasn't the most likely thing to kill her . Hell it wasn't even top ten . But , eventually she would need to go inside . And after that she would just need to hope , praying could help too . She took one last drag and killed the cigarette in the cars ashtray . 

" OK let's get this over with . " She whispered to herself . It 

wouldn't brighten her mood she knew that . She just wanted a reminder of what it was like to speak , talk , just feel like a human . 

Jecka slowly opens the door to the house . Peaking inside to make sure it was safe . Quiet as a mouse she enters and closes it behind her . So far so good . Now it's just up the stairs and- 

" Jessica , welcome home . " Said the cat . 

" Hi dad , I'm really tired so I'm jus- " 

" You were out all day today . Anything big happen ? Anything you should tell me ?" 

" No , I was-"  

" OUT WASTING YOUR LIFE AWAY !?! ? 

" Wait , I was- " 

" IF YOU WANT TO THROW IT AWAY THAT BAD WHY EVEN 

COME HOME! ? ! JUST LIVE ON THE DAMN STREETS!! YOU 

SHOULD BE GREAT AT IT JUST LIKE YOUR WHORE OF A MOTHER !!!! " 

" OK dad . Love you . " The entire tirade Jecka kept her head down and arms tight against her sides . She couldn't run , couldn't hide . All she could do was hope . 

" Love you too sweetheart . Now get some rest ok . " 

When she got to her room she locked the door and dropped to the floor hugging her knees . She took a deep breath , biting back a whimper . Making a poor attempt to blink away the tears starting to pool in her eyes . She made it . She was OK . She was safe . Or as safe as it was under this roof . 

* chirp* 

Anger . The hatred of those horny bastards was enough to snap Jecka out of her depression , for the time anyway . She sucked in as much air as she could and held it in for a bit . 

She still had some stuff to do . She still needed to take out her contacts and remove her makeup . A shower would go a 

long long way too , if she could muster the energy . 

*chirp * 

Nearly on her last nerve she whipped out her phone checking what asshole had t- 

It was Ari that had been texting her . She wants to meet at the bookstore around two . Depressed to angry to depressed again , all in the span of a minute . This can't go on . I got mad because someone I told to text me texted me ? A xanax some 

redtube and a shower . After that , she'll let Nicole know that these bastards will be blowing up her phone from now on . 

Chapter Text

Yeah, just send me their contact info and I'll tell them that's your new number."

Jecka had went to McDonald's with Nicole. They were discussing the terms of their... agreement? Arrangement? Business plan? Well whatever it was called it was now set in stone. Nicole would tell her the when and the where for the following day. No bookings on sundays, and no more than two bookings per day. The money would go straight to Jecka and Nicole would get 20% of that weeks total on Saturday.

"So where are you off to now?" Jecka had just finished the last of her fries. She wasn't even all that hungry, mostly getting it just to help pass time, and make the subject of their conversation less stressful.

"I'm gonna get some Xanax off Emily. Why? Want to tag along?"

"Bitch, I'm your ride. No way are you getting to that Xan without me getting something for myself."

"Touche, well I'm ready whenever you are."

The pair got up and started making their way to go see one of the trashiest bitches they knew.

When they found Emily she was leaning up against her car parked by the chrome diner.

"Sup hoes, you're looking for adderall right?"

"Not this time, you still have xanax though right?" Nicole practically screamed in the middle of a busy diner parking lot.

"I know you two don't care, but can we at least make an attempt to be discreet?"

Emily smirked. "With the way you're looking over your shoulders you must really need these huh?"

Jeckas eyes locked onto Emily causing the 'proud mistake' to grin even wider. "No Emily, I would just rather get my shit and get out without attracting the attention of everyone within 500 feet of me."

"As long as I can get my shit i don't care who knows it. They can be mad." Nicole somehow having even less emotion in her speech than normal.

"60 per. I assume Jecka is covering you Nicole? Or did you swipe more money out of your mom's purse?"

"I'm actually covering both today." Nicole had the biggest grin Jecka had ever seen her with. "Just got a new form of income."

"OK, who is she and what did you do to the real Nicole?"

"The fuck is that supposed to mean? You don't think I would get a job?"

"Cool it, both of you. Between the three of us no one here has a real job."Jecka chimed in bringing the feud to a stand still. "Nicole is buying, the xan for both of us. But i want some addys. I'll cover that myself."

Emily took a long look going between the two. She knows something happened but she can't quite put her finger on it. "Fine, but if you tell me what happened between you two I'll take 20 bucks off."

"I'm a pimp!" Nicole shouted like she had just turned vegan.

No context. No elaboration. That is what she was. I guess. Emily looked taken aback. Which is nearly a Kodak moment itself. She was always ready for anything. Except learning Nicole is now a pimp apparently.

"So if you're the pimp then she would be the ho?"

Jecka rolled her eyes. "Its 'sex worker', but yes."

"You know Jecka, if you needed some protection, you could have just asked me. My boyfriends in ms-13, remember?"

"No, i remember. Honestly, I wouldn't trust either protecting me, but at least I know where Nicole lives."

"Wait, so now you can't turn down my offers to fuck!?! First hits free right?"

"Its not like that, thank christ. And no, first hit is not free. I'm not sleeping with you Emily!"

"Well whatever, if the ho and hoette are finished i have other customers."

"Fine, come on Nicole, I'll drop you off at home."

"You didn't want to hang out more? What was the point of getting this stuff if we weren't gonna do them?"

"I want to hit up the gym. I would invite you, but it's a cold day in hell before you do anything remotely athletic."

"Fair enough."

"But yeah, I'm surprised you reached out. I thought you'd only hang out with Nicole after we graduated."

Ari and Jecka were aimlessly walking the aisles of a Walden books.

"Ummmm, it's complicated" Jecka wasn't about to open that can of worms. Not today anyway.

"Complicated how?"

"...like the Avril Lavigne song."

"So you were dating?"

"No, like the song is called-- whatever."

"Is this technically dating?" Ari had a look like she was on the verge of begging.

God she is desperate.

"I don't know, whats the difference between dating and hanging out?"

"Like uh.... like kissing?"

"Do you want to kiss me?" Jecka knew the answer, she just wanted to hear it. Make her work a bit.

"Absolutely fucking kinda."

"Tell me I'm pretty first."

"You're pretty"

"Whats pretty about me?" Ari, you are a girl. How are you this bad at flirting?

"Um, how you're never able to wash your body glitter all the way off."

Wow, I take it all back. "Alright slut, kiss me."

Jecka went in for a quick kiss, ending it just as Ari registered what was going on.

...

...

...

"So Ari, I noticed your roots are gone..."

Ari was still in a daze from the kiss, but that statement snapped her back to her senses just for her face go from a strawberry pink to a deep scarlet.

"Oh, yeah. I just feel like it's a good look for me. Red is kind of my color." Maybe in more ways than one. "Hey, I heard you don't work at the diner anymore, you find a new job?"

"Yeah, my new job is way better."

"Where do you work now?"

"Oh, uhhh.... foot locker..." Jecka knew Ari would be cool with it but she is NOT ready for that convo. Especially not in the horror section of a bookstore.

"Hey, i work at finish line, how's footlocker though?"

"Shi- umm, the customers just love shoes and socks and... feet."

"Yeah, finish line is easier to work in cause customers don't come in."

"I'm pretty sure my customers come after..." wait did i just-

"Come after what?"

Yup, I guess I just did..."o-oh like- come after the new Jordan's drop." Yeah, nice save.

"Yeah that's the only time my store is busy. And they are so mean on release days."

"Yeah, me too. I mean, mine are really nice to me. But like, in a creepy way."

"Could be worse, all of my coworkers are homophobic or whatever. Is it like that at your job?"

"Wouldn't surprise me."

"You too? We should so quit!"

"You can quit, I kinda need this job til I get to college."

"Yeah I feel that. What college are you going to?"

"University of Pennsylvania. I'm majoring in medical."

Aris jaw dropped when hearing that. "I'm going to UPenn for political science! I'm so glad, I wasn't sure i would fit in up there."

Jecka was at a loss for words. She had no issues with Ari. They get along OK. Better than she got along with someone like Kelly or Megan. But Ari was just an outlet. A way for her to vent her energy because so much of her week is spent with those feet losers. Would she still need her in college? Would she not? Jecka should be jumping for joy. She can see a firmiliar face when she jumps ship from this suburban mom jungle and finally goes to college. Is it because she will just remind her of this shitty town? Ari isn't the reason this town is a nightmare, but will she be able to sleep at night seeing Ari every day?

"So what books are you grabbing today?" Jecka trying desperately to change subject.

"I'm getting 'Carmilla', it's an old vampire book."

"You like vampires? Did you read twilight too?"

"I read the first one, It didn't really capture me."

"Well that's what I was planning on getting. You have any better recommendations for me?"

"You should get 'the hunger games'. The second book is coming out next month. We can read it together."

"That would be cool. OK I'm sold." Buying a book so I can talk about it with someone. Am I really that desperate for a normal conversation? Yes, yes I am. "Hey do you know your schedule for next week? We should find a time to meet up."

Ari's face lit up when she heard those words. "Are you asking me out on another date!?"

"This was a date? Oh, I guess I did kiss you. But just to be clear we aren't 'going out'."

"I'm busy next week with work and my mom's birthday. I'm free the following Sunday the 9th. If you want you can come over and spend the night?"

"Busy all week? You seriously can't make time? Can we go to the mall or something?"

"Jecka, I'm getting a lot of mixed signals. Do you like me or not?"

Jecka was having fun. She wasnt sure if girls were her thing yet. Even though Ari was easy to get along with, she still left a bitter taste. Maybe because Nicole pretended to date her after the hate crime incident?

"Ari, it's complicated, and I just want a friend right now." Jecka felt guilty for saying that, but it was the truth.

Ari gave a soft smile, and her eyes grew hazy. "I-I get it. I'm sorry for pushing. You told me maybe in college, and I guess I was a bit too hopeful."

Then Jecka did something that surprised both of them. She gave Ari a hug, and this time Ari got the chance to return the sentiment. The hug was short, but to both girls, it was enough.

"I'm sorry Ari, but that's all I can give."

"Its alright, I appreciated it."

It was a downpour by the time Jecka got back to the house. She was hoping to just spend the rest of the night and tomorrow hiding in her room and reading the book she just got. And if she was extra lucky her dad would be too far gone to notice her getting home. But when has Jecka ever been lucky?

"Enjoying the weather?"

Jecka was already soaked to the bone but that voice froze her to the core.

"Yeah it's nice." Trying to sound as unconfrontational as possible and keep her answers short. "Good night."

"Good night sweetie."

Jecka got to the safety of her room, hair still standing on end. She couldn't tell if her dad didnt press her becase he was in a good mood or a bad mood. Doesn't matter now. I'm here. Time to watch some Smallville and paint my nails. I'm thinking red would look good. Putting in an ear bud she turned her shuffle on and Msi started playing.

*chirp*

Jecka rolled her eyes. There were significantly less people texting her now. Quickly grabbing and checking her phone, a smile grew on her face. Ari had messaged her, she found some free time Wednesday. This week is turning out to be a bit less agonizing. But before she could reply another message came in. This time from Nicole. She had set up people for Monday Wednesday and Friday. This emotional whiplash is getting harder and harder to deal with. Let me call Nicole real quick.

"Sup ho." Nicole picked up on the first ring.

"Sup bitch. Who did you schedule for Wednesday? Think they can switch days?"

"I mean, I could try? If anything you would do double duty monday."

"That's fine. The sooner I get this shit out of the way the better. So what have you been up to?"

"Idk, normal stuff. I took some Xan. I'm starting to come down though. Gonna try to sleep before it's gone."

"OK, if you can get that moved to Monday I'll appreciate it."

"Yep, bye." *click*

I really hope she can move that to Monday. God, am I gay or desperate? Is it both? Ari is both.

Jecka went back to Ari's texts. They haven't talked all that much, Jecka barely had to scroll to find what she wanted to see. She gave a deep exhale. This is what she is offering if they dated. It was tempting, but would she be able to do that with her current job? Maybe Ari would be cool with friends with benefits? Whatever, let's pop a xan and get cozy. This will be a problem for future Jecka.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

*chirp*

Jecka awoke to her phones text notification, but she really wanted to go back to bed. She was having an amazing dream. She was in Ari's car snuggling up with her. Placing soft kisses on one another. Ari was quietly singing a song Jecka couldn't quite name. She couldn't ask for a happier dream.

Reluctantly Jecka rolled over to check her phone. And what she saw was proof that it wasn't a dream at all. She had just been sent a picture of Ari. And unlike the first one that looked sexy. This one looked down right slutty. Nothing was left to the imagination. Was her ass always that big? Ari cuts on her upper thighs? As soon as Jecka saw the photo she bounded out of bed. Last night really happened and Jecka needed a cold shower.

Jecka loved going to the gym, but it's a lot harder to exercise when it's that time of the month. She was only doing a light workout, she had already showered and didn't even bother to put contacts in. The only thing that got her up and out of the house was the pic Ari had sent. She wasn't looking forward to seeing any of her clients this week. More than usual anyway. Didn't even know that was possible. Maybe she wouldn't have to? Not like this will go on forever. It's just until college. She's leaving in 2 weeks and she wasn't about to take customers that week anyway. I guess I should tell the pimp then news...

"Why are you calling me?"

"What, you become my pimp and we can't be friends anymore?"

"I usually expect a text is all... So what's on your mind?"

"This is the last week I'm taking clients. College is starting soon and I want to start getting ready for a real life."

"Wow, i mean I get it. But wouldn't an extra $700 before college be more beneficial? Addys aren't cheap. And I'm sure they cost way more on a college campus."

"Dammit Nicole!! Why do you need to make so much sense?"

"Cause I'm the shit. Why are you so against it now anyway? You've been doing this all summer. Something must have happened."

"I'm sick of seeing all of these weirdos. Half of them went to our school. You know how bad they are."

"I know, but at this point is there a difference between you doing this for 8 weeks or 9? You're hiding something."

"Whatever, fine, I'll do it for another week."

"Cool. Anything else? I'm meeting with Emily tomorrow, want to come with?"

"I'll think about it. Text me if anything."

"Fine. See you never. Have fun with your loser clients." *click*

Was Nicole mad? Mad might be too strong of a word for Nicole. Upset? Agitated maybe? Either way. Jecka should make time for her. They are best friends after all. When was the last time they even hung out? Maybe she could meet up tomorrow. She could use more xanax anyway. Or maybe some perc.

Jecka was still in a pretty good mood when she got home. She had a good time at the gym. She could just eat some dinner then head to the client. After that she was planning on calling Ari to talk about nothing.

Unfortunately her dad was also making himself dinner. She tried to back away hoping he didn't notice her.

"Jessica, good morning."

SHIT "Hey dad. Morning"

"You have fun at the mall yesterday? I must have been asleep when you got home."

Well yeah, you were on the verge of blacking out when I left. "Yeah, after the mall closed we drove around for a bit."

Come on, get away from the fridge. I just want to reheat some leftovers.

"What friend were you with? Was it Nicole?"

"No it was someone else from school. I bumped into her at the mall the other day."

Finding what he was looking for the father made his way to the kitchen table and started eating. Seizing the opportunity Jecka quickly walked to the fridge and peeked in. A Tupperware of pasta and a can of coke. Jecka was lucky, she didn't even need to warm anything up. Just run up to her room and she's free.

"So any more plans for the week?"

Why is he so persistent today? Is he usually this chatty sober? Jecka couldn't remember the last time she had a sober conversation with this man.

She stopped her retreat and turned to face him. "I don't know, going to the gym again. Might meet up with nico-"

"What was that?"

"Huh?"

"IS THAT A GOD DAMN HICKEY? YOU EXPLICITLY SAID YOU WERENT SEEING A BOY!!!"

"Wait I can explain!"

"FUCKING TRY ME!!" The dad stood up towering over the child.

"I-I actually... got it from a g-girl..." Jecka regretted it before the words left her mouth.

*wham*

Jecka was curled up in a tight ball on the kitchen floor. Clutching her head out of pain and fear.

*wham*

Now she was struggling to breath. The father still looming over his possession.

*wham*

"I didn't raise a dyke Jessica! Get your act together. Don't you dare disappoint me again."

The shadow left Jessica alone on the floor where she belonged.

It was nearly 20 minutes later before Jecka uncured from her ball of shame. She started looking aimlessly for her dinner only finding her broken glasses. She struggled to stand. Her body and mind both nearly broken. She hobbled quietly to her room and took a look in her vanity. Her left eye was bruised and a bit swollen. Her chest and back were sore but nothing felt broken. 'Lucky' her.

Jecka gave herself a fake smile "only two weeks."

Jecka began to sob. She can see Ari next week. And a week after that they go to college. Free from this stupid town and all the stupid people that live here. She can hold on. She has to. Right?

Jecka was smoking in her car. She had already taken some xanax before she started driving. Some rich asshole decided they wanted to be stepped on. And Jecka had to drive out and give them what they wanted. She was half blind from a swollen eye. Her glasses were broken and she didn't want to risk putting in the contact lense, so she can only see clearly out of the right eye. The drive wasn't too bad at least. And Nicole was right, these houses were massive. They looked like every one came with a 4 car garage and an in ground pool. What do these people do for a living?

Jecka finds the house and parks in the empty driveway. She got there on time, but chose to be a few minutes late so she can finish her cigarette. Jecka stretches out her legs, and gives a shallow sigh. "Two more weeks."

Walking up to the house Jecka rang the doorbell. She put on a fake smile and waited. She heard someone run down the stairs and unlock the door. That's when she saw. "ARI?!?"

They both look like they saw a ghost. Ari was dressed in sexy black night gown. Red eye shadow to match her red lips and hair. Her natural blush accented with some glitter. Jecka was half blind but she knew nothing she had seen before was more beautiful than Ari was right now.

Jecka on the other hand looked awful. Thanks to her dad she looked like the shit was kicked out of her. Shitty band hoodie and short shorts. Her hair was down no make up. And her left eye had a natural shade of black and blue. Jecka was everything Ari wasn't. And she cried. Two days in a row she is bawling her eyes out because of this stupidly wonderful girl.

Ari was only stunned for a moment. She grabbed Jecka's hand and pulled her inside the house. Quickly leading her upstairs to her bedroom. She sat the crying Jecka on the bed and planted herself right next to her. The blonde quickly turned and placed her head in Ari's lap and kept crying. The red head just quietly played with the blonde locks laid before her. Finally after nearly 30 minutes Jecka speaks up.

"I took two xanax. How am I still this big of a fucking baby!"

"Just relax for now. I'm not kicking you out any time soon."

"What are you even doing here?"

"I live here? Do you think I stayed in the house the 'straight club' burned down?"

Jecka was still emotionally raw, but the tinge of embarrassment helped bring her back to reality a bit.

"You looked pretty."

Ari wasn't expecting that to leave Jecka's mouth. But she felt good about it. Even with what the blonde was going through, she always saw Ari.

"So if you're ok to talk, do you want to tell me what happened?"

Jecka started crying again, but she forced the words out. "My dad saw the hickey you left." Ari froze. "He had told me not to sleep with a guy... so I told him the truth instead. That's when he hit me."

Ari was stunned. She was the reason for Jecka being like this. She knows people like that exist, and what they can do with a few gallons of gasoline. Yet she still left that hickey. It was all Ari's fault. Jecka was right. She should have waited until college. Ari had made a huge mistake. She doesn't regret what they did last night. She regrets bringing Jecka into her world. A world of playing pretend or get dirty looks. A world of back hand handed comments. A world of prejudice.

"I'm sorry Jecka, if I had known your dad was like that I wouldn't have left the hickey. I should have known better. I act like i love you, but really I know nothing about you." Tears began falling from her soft purple eyes landing gently on the blondes upturned face.

"Its not your fault. He was always like this. And honestly I would prefer if no one knew about him."

Ari opened her tear filled eyes just to see Jecka's beaten face. Another wave of guilt washes over her.

...

"Ari, will you sing for me again?"

"Wha? Sing again?"

"You were singing for me last night too right?"

"You remember? I thought you had nodded off."

"I can't remember the song but I can vaguely hear your voice."

"I was singing blink-182. 'Forever and ever, let's make this last forever!'" A goofy grin grew across Ari's face.

"Think you can sing a bit more for me? I would appreciate it."

Ari began to sing a soft tune. She was already tearing up so her voice didn't carry well, but it still raised Jecka's mood to be a bit less somber.

Jecka was in a happy predicament. She was enjoying the song, but she also wanted to press Ari a bit more. She was confident Ari loved her. You don't spend $300 to see your hooker 'friend' and not have the intention of putting 'girl' in front. You don't put on your best underwear and makeup for just a friend. You don't make out with a girl in your car and the next day send them a picture of your asshole unless you love them. Ok that last one is debatable but still. Ari may be conflicted about her love of Jecka, but she could sing it. That was what Jecka loved about Ari.

Jecka woke up, still on Ari's lap. She rubbed her bad eye and winced. She turned to face Ari who was sound asleep on her bed. Jecka checked her phone, 1am. She must have been asleep for at least 3 hours. Quietly standing up to not wake sleeping beauty she started looking for the bathroom. She also really needed a glass of water, but that will come after. Why couldn't these mansions be cookie cutter houses too? If this had the same layout as Kelly's home she would have done her business by now.

Finally finding the bathroom Jecka was left at awe of its size. The tub was big enough for a few people. It was more of a jacuzzi than something to bathe in. The toilet had a bidet. It had 2 towel closets! As she took everything in she noticed the less flattering parts. The bloody razor blades in perticular put a knot in her stomach worse than these cramps. She had known about this kind of stuff from Nicole, but it impacted her so much more seeing it here.

Jecka quickly freshened up and removed her single contact. She didn't want to stay there longer than what was needed. Once back to the bedroom Ari was awake knees pulled up to her chin.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah, I just needed to pee. It also started yesterday so it's kind of heavy." Why does she look so worried? Did she think I left?

"Did you need anything else? I could get you something to eat."

"That does sound nice. Lead the way." Jecka felt awkward after seeing the used blades. It wasn't time for that discussion though. Let's grab a snack some water and head back to bed. I can bring it up tomorrow.

The couple were sitting side by side in the kitchen sharing a bag of popcorn. They were enjoying the meal, but the atmosphere was tense. Jecka started talking to Ari because it was easier than dealing with her own issues. That isn't the case for her anymore, but is that the case for Ari? Then why does she still cut? She must have done it before Jecka got there.

"So what other bands do you like?" Jecka said desperately trying to drown out her thoughts with her own voice.

"Well, right now I really like Crystal Castles," She took another handful of popcorn. "But Nightwish is my all time favorite. I also play a lot of rock band, so anything from there as well."

"I've played that a few times. Are you any good?"

Ari's eyes widened as she quickly finished chewing. "I play expert guitar and vocals at the same time!!"

Jecka was taken aback. "That's really impressive. I cant sing, and I don't even think I can play guitar on hard. Is that how you learned to sing so well?"

"Kind of? I always loved singing. Playing rock band just made me more competitive? I guess?"

"Maybe we should play rock band some time. If anything I would just watch you put on a concert for me."

"I would be happy with either. What music do you listen to?"

"Mostly anything. I know it's a crappy answer, but I can listen to Johnny Cash or MSI. As for right now? Cobra Starship is taking up a lot of space on my shuffle."
Jecka liked these moments but her mind kept returning to that bloody razor. She wouldn't be able to sleep until this was off her chest.

"So, when I went to the bathroom earlier..."

Ari's eyes narrowed the smile being replaced by a slight frown.

Jecka swallowed hard and continued. "Did you cut yourself yesterday? I saw the razor and blood."

Ari got up to refill her own glass. After filling it she drank half before answering. "Yeah, I just needed it. You know?"

Jecka had an intrigued look on her face. "No. I don't know."

"Well it's just kind of something I need to do."

"Is it because you are depressed? Are you not happy with me?" Jecka didn't think she would start crying but she felt the tears start to form.

"It has nothing to do with you. It's just an unhealthy habit. Everyone has something like that."

"But why cut? Why not just watch porn like everyone else?"

"Its not the same, I don't like lesbian porn. I'm not big on smoking or pills. I do perc once in a while, but cutting will always scratch the itch."

Jecka understood but she really didn't want to.

"I don't really get it, but I want to. So can I cut with you?"

Ari grew pale when she heard that. "Why would you want to start cutting?"

"I don't? I just want to do it with you."

Ari stared her down. "Fine you can cut with me. But only once. Can we talk about something else now?"

"Yeah, i think I'm ready to go back to bed."

Not waiting for a reply Jecka got up giving Ari a soft kiss on the lips, then started walking back to the bedroom. She wasn't happy with the outcome, but she was satisfied.

The pair crawled into bed snuggling in each other's embrace. They still felt on edge, but that could wait. Ari cuddling up behind Jecka was planting tiny kisses on her neck. Jecka wasn't expecting such an insane day to end like this, but she was so happy she could cry.

"Hey Ari?"

"Yeah?"

Jecka was fighting back tears but she knew it needed to be heard.

"I love you, too."

Chapter Text

Jecka awoke to Ari still pressed close to her back. The red head had fallen asleep groping her boobs somehow. She didn't mind though, she was more surprised she was the little spoon.

Jecka moved her hand down Ari's waist to her legs. She was looking for something hidden between them, and with a bit of work she found it. Cut marks. She saw them in the pic, but she never noticed the entire time Ari was walking around in just a lace top and panties last night. True she was looking elsewhere, but feeling the cuts almost didn't feel real.

Ari awoke to the hand between her thighs and quickly tensed up.

"You awake yet?" Jecka giggled "cause If I could get my boobs back that would be cool."

Ari then realized where her own hands were, giving a quick squeeze for good luck before releasing Jecka from the iron grip.

"What time is it?"

"Haven't checked yet. You must have slept well, having the best pillow In the house and all." Jecka rolled over and gave the blushing girl a kiss. "Want to shower quick then go grab some breakfast?"

"How about you hop in the shower and I start cooking breakfast?"

"You don't want to shower together?"

"You don't want a home cooked meal? I'm in no rush, I don't have a shift today."

Jecka gave Ari another kiss admitting defeat. "Fine, I'll shower alone. But I'm expecting the best breakfast of my life."

It took Jecka a lot longer than she was willing to admit to turn the shower on. Getting someone else's shower to work always felt like rocket science. It didn't help that the damn bloody razor was still on the sink. Nicole wanted to chill today. Maybe she could ask her about it. Nicole has no filter so getting an answer would be easy. The quality of the answer is up to debate.

"Hey babe, I'm borrowing some clothes." Jecka entered the kitchen wearing Ari's rainbow tank top and capris that fit just like normal jeans.

Ari was in awe. Not only is Jecka wearing her cloths but she just called her babe. She would be absolutely euphoric if it wasn't for that black eye. Even though Jecka doesn't push any blame onto her she can't help but feel a bit guilty. Feeding Jecka this breakfast might clear her conscience.

"Ari do you usually cook like this? I appreciate it, but I can't see you doing this every day."

Ari let out a magical giggle. "No it don't usually wake up this early. If anything I make myself dinner, but that's usually just boiling pasta or something."

"So the bacon, eggs and french toast is just you being a show off? You can cook, sing and you are going to an ivy league school. Babe, you are simply incredible."

Ari was struck. She had never considered herself all that special, but the blonde had a convincing argument. She could do all of these things people wished they could, and the only thing Ari wanted was the ability to kiss a girl in public.

"So, I'm staying home, what are you planning for today?"

Jecka was half way through breakfast and looking defeated already. Why did she make so much? "Nicole wanted to hang out. I'm meeting with her and Emily later. Oh, are you cool with that? Nicole is kind of your ex."

"I don't mind. I'll say hi if I see her, but that's about as far as I'll go."

"Oh, ok. After that I need to go home and hope my dad isn't there. He's probably flipping out since my car was gone all night."

Ari shuddered, she was fortunate enough to have understanding parents. Jecka went through hell at home before she came out of the closet. There is no way she is safe there alone.

"If you want I can pick you up tonight? If your car stays there he would just think you stayed in your room right?"

Jecka stood up from the table walked over to where Ari was standing and wrapped her arms around her legs. The girl was taller but she was skinny and Jecka went to the gym 4 days a week. She easily lifted her up off her feet. "You are also one of the most selfless people I know. You are simply the best babe."

Ari cupped Jecka's cheeks and brought her in for a kiss.

Jecka found Nicole and Emily loitering outside the malls front entrance. It looked like they were waiting for Jecka to arrive before they started shoplifting. It was Emily who noticed first.

"What happened to your face?"

Nicole's jaw dropped at the realization. "Was that the guy from last night?"

Jecka thought about messing with the two but decided against it. Instead pulling down the collar of Ari's tank exposing the hickey. "No this is what they left me. The black eye is from my shitty dad."

"How much money did they offer you to do more than step on them?"

"Kind of a long story, but to keep it short it was Ari." Jecka just couldn't stop smiling.

The realization hit Nicole like a train. "Isn't that Ari's tank too? Are you just full on gay now?"

Jecka brewed on that last part, the smile staying firmly in place. "Yes, I am gay for Ari."

Emily was enjoying watching the drama unfold while Nicole slowly put more pieces together. "Is that why you want to stop being a ho? Cause you have a girlfriend now?"

"Wow you got it first try, I'm impressed." Emily finally contributing to the conversation.

Nicole rolled her eyes at Emily. "I mean, I'm cool with it. The part I don't get is, why Ari?"

"Yeah! Why are you fucking her, I asked to fuck last week and you told me no!"

"Emily, I am never going to fuck you." Jecka was still smiling but her voice grew quiet. "Besides I didn't even fuck Ari yet..."

"Did you at least step on her? She paid for it and everything."

Jecka began to blush at the mention. "No, I kinda cried the whole time."

Nicole covered her face with her hands. "Oh my god when did you become this gay? Is it because we don't hang out anymore?"

"We are hanging out right now! I'm just gay get used to it!"

"OK, why are you so on edge? take a chill pill or something."

"I can't, ran out. That reminds me, Emily do you have any xanax?"

"I'll give you a freebee if you give me a kiss."

Jecka rolled her eyes. "And how much cash would that be?"

"You really wont take a free pill? What do you see in the box dye bitch anyway? I dated her for like 2 months. She's so annoying."

The smile was gone. Replaced with pure hate. "OK first don't call her a bitch. And second, I chose to date her, hell it tried to make out with her last year... She chose you though. "

"Wait wait wait. Let me see if I have this right." Emily spoke up with a smile that screamed up to something. "So Jecka had a crush on Ari. Ari on Nicole, and Nicole on Jecka?"

Jecka froze and begins to blush. Was that true? Did Nicole like her too? Was that the real reason she was so critical of Ari? She stole a glance at Nicole, she looked as unfazed as ever.

"Can you not put ideas in people's heads? Let's get going. I have money today."

Nicole headed into the mall but Emily stayed behind for a bit.

"If she won't say it then I will. I'm happy for you Jecka."

Jecka scoffed and began to tear up. "Thanks Em, I needed that."

"And if you want a threesome, you know who to ask."

"Thanks Em, didn't need that."

"Well it was a fun time but I got better shit to do."

Nicole laughed. "I wouldn't call seeing your gang member boyfriend 'better shit' but you do you."

"Later Emily, and thanks for the xanax."

"No prob, and remember if you need a third let me know."

"OK, just leave! Come on Nicole let's go to your place."

"Fine by me. Did you have anything in mind?"

"Getting high? What else do we usually do?"

"I don't know, I know Ari doesn't do stuff like that."

"And? That's why I'm doing it with you."

The drive to Nicole's was done in mostly silence. The radio was on but Jecka was tuning it out. Or rather her mind kept wandering back to that bathroom sink. Nicole cuts all the time, it never even occurred to Jecka to ask her to stop. Hell Nicole smokes and drinks and does pills. She has every bad habit in the book. Why is Ari cutting stuck in her head?

Arriving at Nicole's they made a b-line for the wine and medicine cabinet. It was their ritual, but Jecka felt off about the whole thing. She would still have to go home and pick up some cloths. She needs to be mostly sober for that. Maybe no wine today.

Jecka was sprawled out on Nicole's bed. After doing a pill and letting it settle she decided it was time to attack the smaller elephant in the room. "So did you have a crush on me?"

Nicole was lying on the floor playing with a butterfly knife. "Jecka. My options have, and always will be, fuck marriage and kill myself. Emily was probably just mad she wasn't included."

"Yeahhh, that makes sense."Jecka leaned back on the bed and stared at the shitty popcorn ceiling. "Hey Nicole, why do you cut?"

Nicole gave the knife another quick spin. She had great control for someone high on a mystery pill. "Are you a philosopher now? What's with the questions?"

"I found Ari's razor last night. I don't know why but it's been on my mind."

"Its nothing. She isn't suicidal or anything, so there is nothing to worry about."

"I asked to cut with her next time." Jecka's eyes now focusing on the blade dancing in Nicole's hands.

"OK little miss philosopher, why do you want to cut?"

"I don't? I know she likes it though, she fought back when I asked her to stop. So if she enjoyed it, I wanted to enjoy it with her."

"I think you just need to get laid. You would enjoy sex with her way more than cutting with her, trust me."

"You did both of those things with her?!?"

"Yeah, and I actually preferred the sex part. Is it sinking in yet?"

"Starting to yeah."

"Any other questions? Or will you finally let me enjoy this high?" She gave the knife a quick flick.

"Are you happy for us?"

Nicole shot Jecka a look before finally putting the knife away. "I take that back. No more questions."

By the time Jecka sobered up it was already 9:30, giving Ari a quick call to meet at the end of her street they set out to raid Jecka's bedroom and get out without waking the sleeping dog.

"So what do you need? Want me to go in with you or just be the getaway driver?"

"I haven't been to the house yet. For all I know he's blackout drunk, or not even home."

Jecka was smoking her third consecutive cigarette, would she quit if Ari asked? Future Jecka problems. Not getting a second black eye (or worse) is current Jecka problems.

"Do you think you can do a chin up?"

Ari had a look of concern. "What are you suggesting?"

"You are pretty light. I think I can boost you to my window and you just toss me stuff from there."

Ari began rubbing her temples. "OK, that'll be plan D. 'No one is home' is plan A. 'Black out drunk' is plan B. What else?"

Jecka shrugged. "We call Emily? How should I know? I usually just get screamed at, then cry and go to bed."

Ari's eyes went wide at how casually Jecka said that. "Let's start walking. Maybe he's not home and we're just wasting time."

Ari took the lead and started down the road. Jecka timidly took her spot next to Ari and reached for her hand. Ari gave her a reassuring squeeze in return.

"I know you're scared, but don't worry. He will never hit you again. This is ending tonight. Not two weeks from now."

"I can't get everything in just the one run, but thanks for coming with me babe."

"I'm sure we can do another run or two before we leave for college. What are you planning to get this time?"

"Clothes, make up, laptop and phone charger."

"Most of that stuff is replaceable. Wouldn't you want to get more sentimental stuff?"

"If I'm being honest the only thing I can't live without is you and a pack of smokes."

Ari stopped in her tracks. "Say that again..."

It was dark but the embarrassment on Jecka's face was clear as day. "I can't live without you."

"That's what I thought you said. Let's get going we're wasting time."

Ari was dumbfounded. Was that just her type? Girls with flags redder than her hair? Is she enabling? Is she in another hostage relationship? If they end up not working out Jecka ties a noose? Jecka loved her, she was certain of that. She just wanted Jecka to love herself...

They got to the house and it was empty. Jecka can't remember the last time she could just walk straight to her room and not fear for her life. The room was how Jecka left it. So finding everything she wanted would be quick. Ari was nervous and taking in as much as she could. This is the first and potentially last time she would be here.

"That should be everything. Let's go." Jecka had a backpack and rolling suitcase filled in seconds.

"Yeah, you hungry? We can grab some food on the way home."

Jecka smiled, after her miserable past few days everything was going well. She even had a 'home' now. "Let's decide in the car." 

Chapter Text

"Jecka, wake up."

"Babe, can it get ten minutes?"

"I mean, you could sleep a bit more. I'll just shower alone I guess."

Jecka was out of bed as soon as she heard the word shower. She had only seen Ari naked in photos up to this point. She wasn't about to miss this golden opportunity. Ari had already left the bedroom but Jecka was right behind her. Full of energy Jecka lifted Ari up onto her shoulder and walked a surprised Ari blushing and screaming into the bathroom.

"You just said you needed ten minutes, where did this energy come from?"

"You weren't walking fast enough. Speaking of, why are we still dressed?"

Ari had been awake for nearly an hour and was ready to push every button Jecka had. "I was planning on showering like this. What were you expecting?"

Jecka was already naked by the time she registered what was said. She gave Ari a smirk, the red head was shamelessly checking out the tanned body that stood before her.

"Enjoying the view?"

Ari began to blush again. "Sorry, I was distracted." She looked nervous as she inched closer to her girlfriend. "Can you undress me?"

Jecka now red in the face grabbed the hem of Ari's shirt. She wasn't wearing a bra so she got to see the petite body as soon as the shirt passed her head. Ari quickly brought her arms up to cover her chest, and turned to face away from Jecka, leaning over a bit to show off her ass a bit more.

Jecka's hands began to tremble. She moved them to the waist band of the panties, but she could also see the scars on her thighs. Jecka froze, she didn't know what she found hotter. She took a deep breath and started working the panties down to the floor.

"You enjoying the view?" Ari chimed in, now fully naked. "You know you can do more than look right?"

Jecka still bent over, panties in hand, lifted her head. She could see everything, and Ari was giving it to her to do as she pleased.

Jecka attacked Ari with such force she nearly fell over. Jecka wrapped her arms around cut thighs to prevent her from escaping the assault. Ari intended for this to happen, and the blonde wasn't about to disappoint.

"Holy fuck, Jecka slow down a bit." Ari ended up leaning on the tub to keep herself standing. Her legs were weak within seconds of Jeckas tongue entering her.

Jecka responded by tugging on Ari's hips letting her ass bounce off her tanned face.

The red head was gasping for air. "G-god, h-how am I this c-close already?" Ari knew she was pent up, but did that really make her this sensitive?

Jecka brace Ari with one arm moving her now free hand to Ari's clit. The blonde bent down a bit to face the beautiful scars on the thigh. The entrée was good, but this was the main course. She took a nibble and Ari almost broke in two.

"J-Jecka, I'm s-so close." Ari's breath was catching at every touch. Her arms and legs felt like putty. 

"I know babe, I know. Just hold on a bit longer." Jecka picked up the pace, biting the scars more aggressively. She was using all of her strength just to keep Ari on all fours. Jecka wanted a shower and she was determined to get it.

"F-fuck, yes! Jecka! I-I'm cuming!"

Jecka took one last bite, feeling a spray of love come down on her from on high, but her strength wavered for a moment and Ari collapsed to the bathroom floor.

Jecka stood up and moved to Ari's side. "You alright babe?"
Ari gave a big thumbs up. "I'm great!! Start up the shower, I just need to catch my breath."

"So what are you doing after this?"

"Nothing with you! I thought I told you to stop talking!"

"Sorry you just look mad, I wanted to cheer you up." Kyle was face down on the cold tile floor Jecka looming over like a hot blonde Captain Morgan.

"I'm mad because you can't learn to shut your mouth!"

While that was part of it, she was also mad that she and Ari finally had sex not even 2 hours prior, but they both had shifts. Jecka was nearly done with hers, but Ari didn't get done until 5!!! The current plan would be to bum around for 4 hours but that won't last. She didn't have a car, it was left at her dads house like a shitty trojan horse. So she was stuck at the mall until Ari could drive them back to her place. Preferably to fuck.

Jecka gladly spent the rest of her time standing on Kyle's back in silence. Her thoughts on the morning she just had with Ari. Her mind going back to her beautiful voice, and scars. Is it bad she now found it hot Ari cuts? She agreed to let me cut with her. Maybe I can give her a new scar. Maybe we can give each other scars!
"Times up, get out."

"Yeah yeah yeah, are you free tomorrow?"

"No, I'm busy, and next week is my last week. So you better schedule it now."

"Wait you're stopping? Why? Am I not paying you enough?"

"WHO CARES, GET OUT!!!"

Kyle dragged his feet out the door. Leaving Jecka alone with her thoughts. College was just an excuse to quit this job. Ari was the most important part of her future now. She couldn't see her just yet so she went for her other reason to live. Time to smoke.

Jecka walked all the way to the main entrance to smoke. Mostly for who she knew would be there.

"Emily, what a surprise."

"You know I'm everywhere." Emily shot her a confused look. "Did you fuck someone today? I thought you don't fuck clients?"

"I fucked my girlfriend. How can you even tell that by looking at me?"

Emily gave a wry smile. "Give me a cig and I'll tell you."
Jecka gave Emily a lookover as she lit up the cigarette. "Why do you cut so much? Your arms look like a bar code."

"It looks hot, and it feels good to cut. It's a win win. You aren't pale enough to cut though."

"Don't worry, I'm not really planning on cutting, not myself anyway..." Jecka was blushing a bit thinking about it.

"Oh, I've done that with Nicole. It could be fun. But you need to be super high."

"Wait, are you and Nicole dating?"

"Hell no! You think I can date that bitch and not kill her by the end of the month? We had sex once, and she doesn't want to do it again."

Jecka eyes went wide. "Oh my god, Nicole didn't have a crush on me. She just wanted me on her body count!"

Emily scoffed. "Is that really news to you? I'm still trying to get you on my body count."

"How is the least horny one of us the one with the biggest count? How does she do that?"

"Doesn't Ari have the biggest count? I know she tried like half the guys at school before sleeping with nicole."

"If we are going that far then Kelly has everyone beat... Can we change subjects? I already see too many people I don't want to."

"Bitch you came to me. If you don't like the convo you can leave."

"Fine, you already know I fucked today. So how is your life?"

"Fine I guess? Clearly not as eventful as yours. And that black eye looks like it will be around for a while."

Jecka softly touched her eye. It was tender but manageable. She wouldn't go back if she could help it. But she needed more clothes for starters. And if she could grab some of her posters that would be cool too. Is going back to get that really more risky than living there for 18 years? The only thing she would regret is if Ari got involved.

"Hey Em, where are you going after this?"

Emily polished off the cigarette before giving an answer. "Your house or mine?"

"Depends, do you think you can handle my dad like you did Nicole's mom?"

"I never actually slept with her mom. Good idea though."

"THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!"

Emily rolled her eyes and shot Jecka a look of disappointment. "Bitch stop with the questions and just talk."

"FINE!" Jecka took a breath focusing her head. "I want to grab some stuff from my room but I'm scared my dad is there. If he tries to hit me again do you think-"

"I'm not doing anything like that for free. I may be crazy. But I'm not superman."

"Right, well I have money. How much were you thinking?"

"Jecka don't play dumb. It's the same price I've been asking from you."

"You seriously won't help unless I fuck you!?"

"No, that was the old price." Emily was smiling ear to ear. "You are a packaged deal now."

Jecka got goosebumps. She was against it, but if Ari was ok with it how would she react? Would Ari be interested in something like that?

"I don't think Ari will fuck you either." Jecka was able to say those words but not able to believe them.

Emily started walking back into the mall. "She's working right? Let's find out."

"We can't, her coworkers are super homophobic. She already has trouble dealing with it and they don't know she's gay."

"Well when does she get off?"

"At five. I was hoping to hang with you til then."

"What, am I your babysitter now? Find a hobby."

"Like what?"

"Take a page out of your girlfriends book and read."

That woke Jecka up from her waking dream. She had gone book shopping with Ari not even 2 weeks prior. Yet that book was still in her bedroom. Why had she not thought of grabbing it during the raid? Ari was right, sentimental stuff should have been priority. I can replace a stupid shirt from khols. But the day she bought that book was also her first date with Ari. They had their first hug and kiss too. A knot formed in her stomach. Now she absolutely had to go back to that room. Because she loved Ari more than she feared her dad.

"I'm going to the book store. You want to come with?"

"No I'm alright. I can be alone with my thoughts for more than 10 minutes. I'll see you later though."

Jecka didn't feel like buying a new book. Instead she chose to sample a few to see if anything else would peak her interest. Maybe she can find a book and have Ari read it with her. The only books they have both read were from school, and who would want to talk about mein kampf again?

As Jecka combed the aisles she realized she had no clue where to start. Fantasy, horror, mystery, drama, self help. Why are there so many self help books? Don't they all have the same message? She kept sweeping the aisles waiting for something to grab her, but it ended up being a someone.

"Jecka, hi. How have you been?"

It was Karen. It would be a stretch to call her a friend. Friendly would also not do since Karen was friendly with everyone. They drifted apart in middle school and haven't really talked since.

"Karen! I'm fine. I was just trying to find something to read." Obviously, you're in a book store. What else would you be looking for? God I hate forced small talk.

"Yeah same. What genre are you looking for?"

"I honestly have no idea. Ari recommended the hunger games to me, but I only just started it."
"Yeah, Ari told me to read that last spring. It was great. I'm looking forward to the next book."

"Its coming out in a month right? I should hurry and finish the first one then."

Did Ari want me to read that book or is she just obsessed and telling anyone to read it? Am I not special? I really need to finish that book. The sooner we raid my room again the better.

"Actually Karen I really need to be somewhere. It was nice catching up."

"Well alright. It was nice seeing you Jecka."

Jecka might as well have teleported out of the store. It was still a bit before Ari was done with the shift, but she couldn't wait anymore. She ran to the finish line, and the store was empty.

"Where is everyone?"

"I told you. Customers don't come in."

She turned toward the source of the angelic voice. When she saw the red hair and purple eyes Jecka nearly burst into tears.

"How much longer do you have?"

"20 minutes, why?"

"I forgot to grab something from my room last night. Would you want to try again today?"

"What is it that you are willing to risk being in a cast?"

"The book I bought on our first date..." Jecka felt a bit defeated having to admit that. She also felt proud. She was timid to call it a first date at the time, but now it gives her a warm feeling. Ari had really grown on her these past few weeks, and now she can't imagine life without the splash of red in her life.

Ari went pale and took a quick look around the store. It doesn't look like anyone is listening. "OK, I get wanting to get that back. But plan A barely worked last time. Did you come up with a plan C?"

"Maybe? Emily did say she could help." Jecka began to blush as the words got caught in her throat. "She wants a threesome in return."

The color quickly returned to Ari's face, going from white to normal to red. Is she an octopus now? "And what did you say?"

"I told her no! I've been turning her down for months!" Jecka watched closely. Would Ari be happy or upset at that statement?

"Yeah that makes sense. If you want, just buy another copy of the book. It's more important we read it together anyway. It is sweet that you treat it like that though."

"Ariel, is everything alright?" Ari's boss had appeared at the cash register and was staring them down.

"Yeah, I was just helping this customer..." please save me Jecka.

"I'm looking for new gym shoes. What aisle are they down again?"

"Right this way." Nice save.

Ari led Jecka to the back of the shop to pretend to shoe shop until her shift was over.

"Hey do you have size 7?"

"Are you actually shopping? Or are you just putting on a show?"

Jecka took a seat and stuck out her foot. "Can it not be both?" A big grin meets Ari's skeptical gaze.

"Well if that's the case, you know, you never actually stepped on me."

Jecka was taken aback. Was she for real right now? "Did you actually want that? I thought you were just bribing me to sleep over..."

Ari stuck her tongue out and gave the blonde a wink. "Can it not be both?"

"OK, I'll step on you when we get home. Can you find me some pink sketchers? If we aren't raiding my room I'm gonna need sneakers for the gym. I'm not working out in all stars."

"Are you going to the gym tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'm going over Nicole's for a bit then going to the gym. Did you want to come with? To the gym anyway. I know it's a no for seeing Nicole."

"The carpooling thing is weird. I can drop you off at the gym and go grocery shopping while you work out?"

"That sounds great. Are you planning another 5 star meal?"

"Yeah, I want to have kind of romantic dinner tomorrow. Let's talk about this later. I'll cash you out and clock out."

How did Nicole hate this girl? She is super forgiving, cooks for me, sings for me, has cool interests, and is super fun to fuck! Actually would that last one be a turn off for her? Huh. Whatever time to break in these new shoes, maybe Ari will let me break them in on her? Wow does that sound bad. Maybe i should have gotten that self help book... 

Chapter Text

Jecka once again awoke to Ari's warm embrace. She loves the feeling, but just couldn't grasp she was the little spoon in their relationship. They haven't even been dating a week, but waking up these past few days next to this beautiful girl made Jecka feel like she found her place in the world.

Jecka tuned to Ari. "Babe, wake up."

Ari didn't open her eyes, instead choosing to pucker her lips. Jecka gladly took the invitation planting a soft kiss joining the two to one. They were calm just savoring the moment and the taste of each other.

"OK now I'm awake. You want breakfast again?" Ari had a gentle smile, hand softly cupping Jecka's cheek.

"I would love some breakfast. I'll see you there though, bathroom first."

The two left the warmth of their sanctuary and begrudgingly began their day. Two more weeks and we will be doing this in college. Waking up in each other's embrace, going to our classes, eating lunch together, partying on the weekends, or just staying in to make out while a movie plays on the tv.

Jecka only had one more appointment this week and then whatever desperate nobody booked her for next week. There was also Ari's parents. They would be coming home sometime next week. Jecka had never met them before, but I'm sure if Ari tells them what happened and they see my black eye they will let me stay until we leave.

The only real issue is needing to get some extra stuff out of my room. Emily said she can help, but I would still rather not sleep with her. Maybe we can just do a steak out and wait for my dad to leave.

Ari dropped Jecka off at Nicole's at 2. Jecka felt off about it, last time all they did was get high. Why was Nicole so insistent about her coming over today? Jecka finished off her cigarette as she knocked on the door. Ari waved her off with a smile as she drove down the road and out of sight. She wasn't planning on staying too long. But she hated having so much distance between them. The blonde turned back to the door as it was being unlocked. Nicole opened the door with her usual poker face.

"Welcome!"

"Hello to you too? Why are you saying hi like that?"

"So unfortunately you aren't here to see me today."

Confusion was covering Jecka's face. "Why the fuck would I come here then?"

"To step on my brother."

"NICOLE!! YOU DID NOT!!!"

"$500 Jecka, can you manage his smell for $500?"

Jecka was clenching her jaw. That was almost how much she had made this week already. But that gross pig is the worst of the worst. She would rather step on Jeffery than look at Nicole's brother. "Fine, but can you stay in the living room? Also if you have a Xanax, cause there is no way I can do this sober."

"Yeah I got your back, what else is a pimp for?"

"Hey, are you coming downstairs or what?" Nicole's brother was peeking out of the basement. Most of his body still hiding behind the door. How did he sneak up to us? How can someone with that BMI be that quiet?

"Its getting moved to 2:30, she needs a xan first. Go play your games she'll be down so keep your mouth shut." Nicole had so much authority in her voice. The ogre slunk back into the basement to wait.

"I just need to keep telling myself it's for $500. God damn, how did you even get him up to that price? Does he think I'm still 17 or something?"

"I don't think pedophiles care if you're 15 or 19 as long as you act young. Age is just a number for them. Remember?"

"$500 and a free xanax. I can do this."

As the xan kicked in Nicole was sitting next to her on the couch distracting herself with that butterfly knife.

"You ready?"

"No but I don't have a choice do i?"

Jecka stood up shaking a bit. But not nearly as bad as she would without the xanax. The basement door looked more like a portal to hell. Or worse. She reluctantly made her way to the bottom of the stairs gaging at the smell. Could she even keep her lunch down for 30 minutes?

"Finally, I was starting to think you bailed on me."

"Your sister told you it was 2:30. It's now 2:30. Don't get an attitude because you can't tell time."

"Yeah, whatever. So how do we do this?"

"You lay down and shut your mouth preferably." Jecka was keeping a frown firmly planted on her face. She wanted to make it clear she was enjoying nothing.

"OK, but I want you to compliment me the whole time."

"What is there to compliment? You live in your mom's basement, you don't bathe, you don't even go outside. Do you even have a real job?" Doing this is worse than every other asshole she has done this to. "Hey, hands where I can see them!"

"What? I'm just putting them in my pockets."

"Bitch I know how basketball shorts work. Don't fucking touch yourself, or I'm walking out." Jecka no longer noticed the smell, she was still fighting back a gag though. There is no way this could get worse.

"I'm not touching myself. Look I'm not even hard yet."

Jecka screamed she has been doing this for months and her worst nightmare had just came true. And it was Nicole's brother of all people. He turned to get up reaching for Jecka's leg. But she was quick and kicked him square in the jaw.

"YOU BITCH GET BACK HERE!"

Jecka was already half way to the living room when he got his  bearings. When she got upstairs Nicole was still there on the couch in her own world.

"Was it 30 minutes already?"

"Nicole he took out his dick!" That snapped Nicole out of whatever high she was on.

"Oh, well that's not good."

The ogre appeared at the top of the stairs boxers still around his knees "you bitch, think you can get away with that?"

Both girls screamed. This can't be real. He lunged at Jecka one more time, this time actually getting a hold of her leg. She kicked him in the dick but his grip only tightened. Nicole was stunned. She was seeing the last thing she would ever want to see. And she was powerless. Her brother had a hold of Jecka and was tearing her pants off, they were nearly halfway down her legs.

She clenched her fists and that made her come back to her senses. Not the the fist balling up, but what she felt in her hands. It was her butterfly knife. She flipped it open and attacked the pedophile stabbing him in the neck. The knife wasn't all that sharp, but it wasn't a training blade either. Besides with all 90 pounds of her pushing it into the trolls neck it's sharpness was irrelevant. The blade sunk deep, and crimson quickly pooled on the blade dripping onto Jecka, still screaming for her life. Nicole felt nothing. She was already traumatized, this is just one more 'Nicole's fault'.

She pulled Jecka up from beneath what was once her brother and held her.

"Give me your phone, I'm calling the cops"

Jecka was still in shock and didn't respond. Nicole was shaken, so she can't imagine what it was like for Jecka right now.

"I'm using your phone." Nicole reached for the phone luckily still in one piece and dialed 911. After a short conversation with the dispatcher she called Ari.

"Get to my place now!"

"What happened? Why are you calling me from Jecka's phone?"

"Just get here. She needs her girlfriend." *click*

The cops arrived first. And by then Jecka was able to start moving again. Or at least nod. They got rid of the body quickly it only took 4 people to move the fat fuck. They moved me and Jecka outside because the house was now a crime scene. Unfortunately All of the emergency vehicles were still outside when Ari got there.

"Nicole what the hell?"

Nicole didn't even hesitate to pass the shivering Jecka onto Ari. "Here she needs you."

"Oh my god i can see that, but why? What is going on?" Ari sat on the lawn and held Jecka like a baby in her lap. Jecka still mostly out of it started nuzzling Ari's shoulder. The red head responded by combing her fingers through blonde hair and humming a tune.

"My shithead brother assaulted her, so I stabbed him." Nicole's poker face on full display.

Ari was in awe. "That can't be all."

"No that was it."

"OK, thanks for saving her." Ari turned to look at Jecka now starting to nod off in her embrace. "She means a lot to me."

"Yeah, I thought I would be happier. Jumping at the chance to kill that pedo. But when he started attacking her for an instant I froze."

"But you didn't freeze, you acted, thank you. So is there anything else? Can we leave?"

"I think the cops still want to question her." Nicole looked at Jecka sound asleep in Ari's lap. "Give her a 15 minute nap and she should be good."

Ari glared at that answer. "We have vastly different definitions of 'good'."

"I'm sorry, ok? Does that help? Me apologizing? I can't get her un-assaulted. I did what I could, and I might still go to jail for murder. Just hold your girlfriend."

Ari was at a loss for words. Nicole had saved Jecka's life, and she killed someone to make that happen. Would she be able to do the same? Almost certainly, she had a knife on her all the time too. It wasn't fancy or anything just a pocket knife, but could she really kill someone?

Ari began to cry. This wonderful girl now asleep in her arms was in so much danger and she didn't even know. What would have happened if Nicole wasn't there?

"Thank you, you didn't just save Jecka. You saved my whole world."

Hearing that from Ari caused Nicole to drop her poker face for a moment. "She means a lot to me too."

The pair sat in silence on Nicole's lawn, cops pretending to work as they entered and exited her house. It was nearly 4 when Jecka finally woke up. She was still shaken but she could talk.

Ari cradled her head into the crook of her neck. "Thank you! I was so worried. Are you alright? Do you need water?"

"Babe? When did you get here? What time is it?"

"Everything is fine. You are safe, I have you now."

Nicole stood up still looking a bit beaten. "You stay here, I'll grab a cop. The sooner she does the report the sooner you go home."

Ari gave her ex a quick smile as she walked off before turning her attention back to her current girlfriend. "All you have to do is answer a few questions then I can take you home."

Jecka just yawned and nuzzled Ari's neck. "Good, I missed you as soon as you drove off. Don't leave me again."

Ari smiled as she pulled Jecka closer. "Don't worry. You are mine, you shall be mine, and you and I shall be one forever." 

Chapter Text

"Feeling any better?" Ari rested her head on Jecka's shoulder and started humming a tune.

"Thanks babe, I'll be fine. I'm just really tired."

The couple were laying in bed, it was only 9pm but Jecka was exhausted from her encounter with Nicole's brother. Ari was Jecka's security blanket keeping her warm and safe. The red head gladly took the role of big spoon, she knew her girlfriend needed it emotionally. Jecka said so herself, she wanted to use Ari as an escape. That didn't bother her though, what did was that she was OK with being used.

Ari knew she wasn't the healthiest person to be in a relationship with. But the fact that her current and previous girlfriends are somehow both worse worried her a bit. Ari had hobbies. She can sing, she read books, she knew how to cook. Her and Jecka have been dating for less than a week. They are dating right? Jecka calles her 'babe' so they have to be in a relationship. How did they become so dependent on each other so fast?

Jecka began to stir, facing Ari and planting her face in pale cleavage, a big smile growing on their faces. This was Jecka's reason to live. No bigger reason. Not college, not to have a good job or travel the world. Just snuggle with Ari until the end of time, and Ari will give it to her.

"Are you sure you don't want to eat? I can warm up some pizza rolls or something." Ari was planning to cook dinner for her tonight, but that was thrown out the window pretty quickly. Besides she had something else on her mind. Her legs were itching, but now was not the time or place.

Jecka responded by mumbling into her girlfriends boobs. "I think i get it now. This is just something I need. I could stop but why would I want to?"

Ari's eyes widened. "Are you talking about what I think you are?"

Jecka responded by burying her face deeper into Ari's boobs and scrunching her legs up tighter.

Ari wasn't sure what she should think anymore. Jecka asked before to do it. And while she initially turned the idea away, it felt really tempting right now. Jecka clearly found the cuts hot, and Ari really wanted to add more right now.

Ari fished for Jecka's hand and brought them to her mouth for a soft kiss. The action made the blonde raise her head. Their eyes met and Ari's stomach turned. Jecka still had that black eye. This girl wasn't safe anywhere but here in her arms. She needed to make sure she wouldn't leave her side again.

Ari still holding Jecka's hand traced out her curves down to her thighs. Jecka was trembling the whole time, not sure where her hand would stop. That's when she felt them.

"You like this right?" Ari was blushing but it was too late to back out now.

Jecka could only nod in embarrassment. She was blushing a vibrant red. Slowly moving her hand across the scars between her girlfriends legs. She had touched them before and she still got a thrill every time.

"Is that helping bring your energy back?"

Jecka responded with a kiss. It wasn't long but she still managed to slip her tongue in. "I'm feeling better already."

Ari didn't care that she was enabling. If it was helping Jecka it was worth it. Let her play with the scars on her legs they kiss a bit and go to bed. And if Ari decides to let Jecka put her own mark there it will be fine. It's not hurting anyone else, right? Couples get matching tattoos all the time. Is leaving a mark with a razor really that different?

Ari went back to humming a tune and Jecka began to giggle. Her hand going from gently stroking the scars to scratching a bit. Ari began to shiver, was it even possible to get withdrawals from cutting? She couldn't even be mad. She's the one that put Jecka's hand there. Just once, right? They do it once and never again.

Ari bit her lip hard, almost enough to draw blood. "Jecka, do you want to move this to the bathroom?"

Jecka responded with an extra hard scratch across the cuts and a soft kiss on the lips. "You mean it? You'll let me do it babe?"

Ari took a deep breath. God this is such a bad idea. "Yes, but just once."

Ari slowly led Jecka to the bathroom. She was still a bit week but she was alert because of what her girlfriend promised.

"Just sit on the toilet for now. I'll get the stuff ready." Ari was having second thoughts but it was already too late to turn back. She just couldn't let this beautiful blonde down. Jecka had a smile on her face that no one could say 'no' to. So obviously Ari was powerless at this point.

Once she got the blade, peroxide and toilet paper she sat across from Jecka on the edge of the tub. Jecka was unblinking, staring down at the blade with eagerness. Ari was shaking a bit, but once she moved the blade to her leg her shaking subsided. She always enjoyed this, that's why she has been doing it for so long. Having Jecka there added to it. It almost made it thrilling.

Ari took a deep breath bringing the blade up to her skin, not yet breaking it. "Are you ready?"

Jecka was silently in awe. She was scared to breath if that meant Ari would stop. She just stared, letting her fantasy become real.

Ari gave her a slight nod and applied a bit of pressure. It didn't hurt. It was too shallow, like a paper cut, but it was enough. Drops of blood started forming around the blade. Jecka was looking on like a kid watching fireworks go off. Then Ari began to move the blade. She wasn't aiming for a deep cut at first. It's been so long she wanted something small to test her mood. She put the blade down and began to clean the cut. She wasn't satisfied.

Ari gave Jecka a questioning look. "Nothing to say?"

Jecka's eyes were fixed to the fresh cut. "That was really fuckin hot. I don't know what to say besides that."

Ari swallowed hard. Why do red flags have to be so hot? Maybe that's why Jecka loves me so much. We feed our bad habits like some type of lesbian ouroboros.

"What did you want to do next?" Ari was begging with her eyes. "I don't think this is deep enough. Did you want to keep watching?"

Jecka was a bit nervous now. "C-can I watch it one more time?"

That made Ari happy... We should be in therapy, individually, couples, everything. Therapy would be nice, but at the moment all she had was a blade. She brought it to her skin giving it another cold kiss. Taking a breath she deepened the kiss, it was almost intimate. The blood began to pool before slowly dripping to the floor. Ari put the blade down and was about to clean the cut when Jecka leaned forward kissing her. Ari braced herself by putting her hand on Jecka's throat, but Jecka leaned hard into the hand almost knocking Ari back into the empty tub.

After a moment Jecka was satisfied and sat back on her porcelain throne. She licked her lips and watched as Ari awkwardly treated her cut. Ari was happy with the cut, but if her queen wanted more she would gladly continue.

"So, what next?"

Jecka had a smile ear to ear. "I honestly don't know. I kinda want you to do that to me..."

Ari was struck. Could she harm her perfectly tan skin? Even if Jecka herself demanded it? She could do a tiny cut. Just enough to have drops form but nothing deep. It would be less harm than Jecka cutting herself.

Ari stood up to rinse the blade. "Where did you want me to cut?" She gave Jecka a hurt look but all she could see in return was pure joy.

Jecka gave it some thought. "I kinda of want it on my leg too. But I kinda of want it on my chest, over my heart." She was blushing before she even finished that sentence.

Ari leaned in and kissed the blondes forehead. "I'm only cutting you once. You are only getting one scar."

Ari reached down and grabbed Jecka's chin to lift it up. Their eyes met with mutual understanding. Ari will cut herself for Jecka, but Jecka was forbidden to cut herself.

Ari looked over Jecka's body. Her boobs were big. Like really big, but that meant they already had some scarring from stretch marks. If Ari was leaving a mark she would want it to stand out. So she turned her attention to the legs. Jecka worked out a lot so her legs were toned, and didnt look all that good to cut either. But it would have to do.

Ari bent down to get a better look at her canvas. Jecka blushed as Ari spread her knees apart. Ari wasn't even paying attention to that, the only thing on her mind was the skin and the blade.

Ari gave a quick glance. "Last chance to back out."

Jecka took a deep breath and smiled. "I'm ready babe."

Ari slowly put the blade to the tanned skin. The skin didn't even break but a soft moan escaped Jeckas lips. Ari gave the thigh a quick kiss with her mouth followed by the blade. The leg quickly tensed and another moan broke from Jeckas mouth.

Ari wispered in response. "Its alright, you're doing great. Just a few more seconds and it'll be over."

As she pulled the blade another gasp broke free of Jeckas mouth. Ari was taken aback. Was she like this because of the cut or because Ari was the one doing it?

As the blade left skin and blood began to pool Ari took another look at Jecka. She had a face of tears but there was no pain in her eyes, only pleasure. Why are red flags so fucking hot?!?

Ari put the blade down on the floor. But instead of starting to clean the cut she gave it a lick. Jecka was stunned, but Ari didn't let her stay like that. She quickly stood up and kissed Jecka deep. Their tongues sharing in Jecka's pain and pleasure. They kept kissing until the taste of copper was no more.

Ari was conflicted. She never wanted to do this again. But Jecka looked like she just had the best sex of her life. And with how wet Ari felt it might have been mutual. Ari turned her attention back to the canvas with a single cut and tiny pools of blood.

"I'll clean this for you, just give me a minute."

"I love you, babe."

Ari froze. We can't do this again! "I love you, too." 

Ari started cleaning her canvas. Jecka would be kicking her feet in glee if Ari wasn't in the way. The cut was good and cleaned quickly. As the peroxide was applied Jecka gave another soft moan. We can't do this again!

"OK, I'm hungry. Why don't you get dressed while I clean up? Then we can go pick up McDonald's or something."

Jecka didn't say a word instead giving a slight nod before going in for a kiss. Ari began to kiss back but then Jecka bit down on her lip HARD. She tasted blood. She slowly pulled away.

We can't do this again!

Ari combed her fingers through blonde hair. Golden eyes staring back asking for anything, everything. Ari pulled Jecka in for a hug and began to cry.

We shouldn't have done this. We can't take anything that happened here back. Neither of us should want this. But then why did it feel so good?

"I had no idea I could even get this hungry. Thanks for paying babe."

"No problem, it's not like McDonalds is expensive. I'm just glad you look alive again."

The pair were sitting in the parking lot enjoying their meal, the radio was quietly playing in the background.

"Yeah I feel pretty good. The food isn't the only thing that helped though." Jecka looked down at Ari's leg her new cut peaking out from her shorts already starting to scab.

Ari's stomach turned. She would have stopped eating if she wasn't so hungry. She got swept up in the moment and did something she will regret. She doesn't regret it yet, but she knows it will happen. If she's lucky Jecka's smile will fight off that regret for as long as they are together.

"Do you have any plans for tomorrow? I have a shift but after that we can do mini golf or something."

"That would be cool. I don't have anything planned. Nicole canceled all of my appointments and isn't booking anymore. I'm officially not a ho anymore!"

Ari was wearing a smile but she only felt pain. She would need to make it up to nicole for saving jecka too. Maybe she would play mini golf?

"Oh, babe, we also need to raid my room again. I want that book from our first date."

"If that's all you want I can buy you a new one. Do you really want to risk seeing your dad again?"

"You can buy me a new one. I still want that one to keep on my nightstand or something."

"Alright then. We can go Sunday or something. All we need to do is drive by and see if he's home."

Is this enabling again? It's just a book. No harm in just picking a book up. Plus it will make Jecka happy. How can making Jecka happy not be the right decision.

Chapter Text

Jecka woke up alone in Ari's bed. Ari usually woke up before her, but she still didn't like the feeling of being without her. She moved her hand between her legs finding the cut Ari had given her a few days ago. It felt beautiful. It wasn't too big but it was big enough where it will scar her skin forever, just like Ari has scared her heart with her love. Now Ari was the thing keeping it beating.

Jecka took a breath and got out of bed. No amount of blankets would keep her as warm as Ari's touch, so there was little incentive to stay in bed.

Jecka walked down stairs and entered the kitchen to see Ari with a plate of toast half eaten reading a book. The rain outside letting the indoor light illuminate her like a heavenly spotlight. Jecka was in awe of just how beautiful this girl is.

"Hi honey, did you sleep alright? you hungry? I can make you some breakfast quick."

Jecka walked over and placed a kiss on the red heads cheek.
"Good morning babe, I slept fine, and I would love some breakfast."

Ari stood up giving the blonde a soft kiss on the lips before hurrying over to the stove. "it'll be ready in a bit. Just grab some juice and have a seat."

Jecka took a seat, leaning on the kitchen table watching her girlfriend prepare a breakfast and singing a sweet tune. "Did you have any plans for today? I kind of wanted to try raiding my room but this weather is telling me no."

"I had no plans, I kinda just want to read a bit. It's such good reading weather."

"If you want to read all day, can it just lay in your lap the whole time?"

Ari stopped poking at the food on the stove and turned to face Jecka. Her eyes were hazy." I would love nothing more than for you to be with me for that."

The meal wasn't as grandiose as their first one. Just eggs, sausage and toast, but Jecka ate like it was her last meal. Once the couple finished their breakfast they headed back to the bedroom. Ari eagerly sitting on the bed impatiently waiting for the weight of Jecka's head to form on her lap. Once they were comfy Ari began to read quietly as Jecka nodded off. Funny enough good reading weather is also good napping weather.

Ari quickly made progress in her book, as Jecka quietly snored on her lap. But the rain brought a suprise...

*BOOOM*

Jecka shot awake, she wasn't scared only shocked from the sound. Ari giggled and gave her a hug.

"It was just some thunder, go back to sleep."

"I'm actually wide awake now. So how is your book?"

Ari gave a chuckle. "Its good. Some dickhead is hunting down the vampire. She only killed a few people and made out with the main character, I think they are over reacting."

"Sounds it. If you made out with me I would let you kill whoever you wanted."

"I know right!! Don't kill your daughters girlfriend just because she knows what she likes!"

"Wait that's a lesbian book!? Why didn't you recommend that to me in the bookstore?"

Ari gave her a skeptical look. "Jecka, you were still in the closet at the time. Or on the fence. Probably both somehow."

Jecka let that sit with her. Two weeks ago she wasn't even sure if she should date Ari or not. Now here they are having their seventh consecutive sleepover. A sleepover that includes making out before falling asleep. How would Jecka from two weeks ago process that information? She felt her leg throb. The reminder of the cut bringing her back to reality, or out of reality and back to her waking dream.

"I'm glad I'm not who I was a week ago. Because a week ago I didn't love you as much as I do now. How long was i out for anyway?"

Ari unsure herself took her phone out. "Maybe an hour. It's just after 1pm. Did you want lunch soon? Or did you want to do something besides watch me read?"

Jecka was smiling so hard. She couldnt stop if she tried. "I can eat. But if anything would you want to sing for me? I hear you're amazing at rock band."

Ari's face lit up. "Sounds ok to me. I'll get everything ready."

Jecka woke up in the middle of the night to another thunder clap. She began to stir but Ari's arms were still tight around her body. She nuzzle her girlfriends arm already feeling safe from the pretend danger that woke her up.

As she layed in her cocoon of love. The minutes passed but she couldn't check her phone, it must have been close to 4am. Ari was still in a blissful sleep holding her favorite body pillow. But Jecka was feeling more on edge as the time creeped on. She began to move her hand to her new comfort spot. The cut on her leg. Just rubbing it at first but slowly she began to feel hotter and hotter.

After just a minute Jecka knew it wasn't enough. She slipped her other hand under her shirt. She reached for her nipple and gave it a soft pinch. She quickly shut her mouth to keep her voice from waking sleeping beauty. She knew the risk, but was too far in to stop now.

Moving her other hand from the scar up her leg and into her panties she began at just the opening not yet putting a finger in, she played with the folds and gave her nipple another soft squeeze.

She bit down on her lip. She couldn't afford to make noise. She couldn't get found out. She can't let Ari see her like this. Taking a deep breath and holding it she put a single finger in. She knew her insides well, she could finish in a minute or two with a second finger. Just finish and go to bed. She wasn't sure she can be silent with a second finger though...

She felt a squeeze. Ari began holding her tighter, her breath softly hitting her ear. Jecka needed to finish. And fast. She took in another deep breath and put a second finger in. She let out a squeak, but it wasn't nearly as loud as it could have been.

Jecka was silent, waiting to see if that woke Ari up. After a few seconds she began to move her fingers again. Every time she touched her spot another squeak would escape. It was hard finding a good rhythm with how tight Ari was holding her, but it was enough to make progress. She gave her nipple another pinch and her breath hitched. Jecka used to do this all the time, did it always feel this good? Was it because of Ari's embrace that enhanced it?

Jecka began to pick up the pace when almost on cue.

"Good girl, you're doing great."

Jecka froze, when did she wake up? Is she really ok with what I'm doing?

"Don't stop honey, you are so close."

Jecka had never felt this hot in her life. With all caution thrown to the wind she picked up the pace again really making sure to have her fingertips linger on her spot. Where once squeaks now deep moans escaped. She felt so close. Ari kept whispering into her ear but her moans drowned it out.

Then Ari spoke up. "Be a good girl and finish for me."

Jecka broke. She came hard, the hardest she ever had. It wasn't even close.

Ari nuzzled the back of Jecka's neck. "Good girl, I'm so proud of you."

Ari was still holding her tight so Jecka couldn't turn to face her, but she kept kissing the tip of her ear and giggling.

"You are such a good girl Jecka. I hope you know that."

Jecka didn't respond. Instead sinking deeper into Ari's embrace, and falling asleep.

It was late the next day. The rain had stopped by sunrise and the couple were preparing for another raid to get the last of Jecka's stuff. Jecka was smoking her second consecutive cigarette taking long drags trying to fight off all the tension building on her shoulders. They knew they could just try again tomorrow. But Jecka really wanted this done today.

"Are you ready babe?"

Ari gave a nod and squeezed Jecka's free hand. "Don't worry. I will always be here with you. Forever."

A small smile crept onto Jeckas worried face. "I know babe. I know."

As they started down the road their hopes were high. It looked like only one car in the driveway, which means it was Jecka's. But as they got closer their jaws dropped. Jecka's entire bedroom was out on the front lawn. Clothes, posters, dresser with vanity, even her bed!

Ari began to slow down, but Jecka was unbuckled and out of the car as soon as they got close to the property. She was crying. Everything was either broken or soaked. Her dad must have done this before the rain yesterday. Nothing looked salvageable. Even the vanity was shattered. She began digging through the pile of cloths. She knew it was somewhere in the mess. If it made it through so could she. All she needed to do was find it.

Ari had parked the car and joined her girlfriend in looking for anything still worth bringing back. Most of the cloths were ok. Some were torn but most were just wet.

Then Jecka cried out and began to sob. "I found it."

Ari went to her side to see her clinging to a waterlogged copy of 'the hunger games'. Jecka was devastated, that man wasn't even here. He chose to abuse her emotionally since he didn't think he would get the opportunity to hit her again. She was hunched over on the damp grass cradling the book like it was her child, eye still black and blue. She couldn't win, he will always have the last laugh.

Ari walked up to the love of her life and lifted her to her feet. "Jecka, we shouldn't stay here. Bring that to the car. I'll grab some of your clothes. You are never coming back here again."

Jecka stumbled to the car. It was hard to see with all the tears in her eyes, she just couldn't find the time to wipe them away. She was never coming back.

She didn't need to win, she just needed to be free. Ari was her freedom. College was her freedom. She will take a seat and her prince charming will drive her away to a happily ever after.

Before she knew it Ari was next to her in the driver seat on the phone with someone. Jecka didn't care who, she took another look at the ruined book in her hands. It was falling apart but it didn't break. It was damaged and unreadable, but it was hers.

Ari drove them to the diner, Emily was waiting for them there.

"So what do you need from me again?"

Ari responded by bringing out a second key ring. "I need you to drive me to Jecka's house so I can drive her car back here."

"You don't need me to kill her dad or anything? Cause I will."

Ari had a stern face, it was serious but not angry. "No we are done with him and that place. The only thing left is the car. Now will you drive me?"

"Sure, but I have a price."

Without flinching Ari pressed her lips against Emily's. That was the second time Emily was ever surprised.

Ari broke the kiss. "There, that will cover everything. Now drive."

Emily was blushing a bit. "Wow you are serious. Ok let's do this."

The drive wasn't a long one, but with Emily driving Ari wished it would be quicker.

"So, Jecka's the one huh?"

"If you have something to say then say it."

Emily laughed. "You two are so bad for each other. You know she wants to cut with you, right?"

Ari's face turned bright red at the mention. She did everything she could to avoid Emily's all seeing eye.

"Wait, you actually cut with her didn't you?"

"So what if we did? She liked it and I told her we won't do it again. So what's the big deal? It's like getting a couples tattoo."

"The big deal is what are you gonna do if you want to cut again? Are you just gonna lock the door and hope she doesn't notice? If you even look at a razor she is gonna-"

"I KNOW EMILY! I know." Ari looked down in shame. "I was shaking the entire time we were doing it. I genuinely never want to touch a razor again. She never even touched the razor. I did the cut, but I can already tell if she could do it herself she would look worse than you in a week."

Ari took a deep breath fighting off tears. She knows Jecka is happy with her imperfect self. It's that imperfection that drew Ari's attention in the first place. They aren't in a healthy relationship, but with Jecka's home life she never got to see what a healthy one looks like. Jecka never saw a happy relationship either, but Ari is confident she can give that to her girlfriend. And we can work on everything else from there. Because we have no choice now but to make it work.