Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

After spending so much time researching and watching the movies, I have rearranged the timeline to work with this series.

This timeline is to help you understand the layout of the series.

This timeline has one thing about the reader, the rest is brief spots of the movies and other important information. I didn't want to include too much about the reader or the changes I'm making to the movies. No spoilers are allowed here.

MAIN STORYLINE TIMELINE
1832:

James Logan Howlett born
1845:

Logan’s mutation manifests
Victor Creed (Logan’s half-brother) and Logan runaway
1861 - 1865:

Logan and Victor fight for the Union in the Civil War
1917 - 1918:

Logan and Victor fight for the U.S. Army in World War 1
1930:

Erik Lehnsherr born
THE READER IS BORN
1932:

Charles Xavier born
1934:

Raven Darkholme born
Hank McCoy born
1944:

Logan and VIctor participate in the D-Day invasion
1945:

Logan saves Ichiro Yashida’s life while imprisoned in a POW camp in Japan
1959:

William Stryker begins his work on mutants
1962:

Charles is paralyzed
Erik forms the Brotherhood of Mutants
1963:

Jason Stryker born
Scott Summers born
1964:

Ororo Munroe born
1965:

Charles opens Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters
1967:

Jean Grey born
1972:

Logan and Victor meet William Stryker and join Team X
Logan quits Team X
1974:

Charles reopens the School
1975:

8 year old Jean Grey loses control of her abilities
Charles finds Jean and takes her to the school - he blocks her memories and puts psychic blocks to limit her powers
1978:

William Stryker sends Jason to Xavier’s School but pulls him quickly after finding out that Charles encourages him to embrace his mutation
1979:

Victor Creed hunts down and kills former members of Team X
William Stryker has Victor kidnap mutant children including Scott Summers
Adamantium is injected into Logan’s skeletal system
Logan finds the experimenting facility
Logan loses his memory
1986:

Piotr Rasputin (Colossus) born
Marie D’Ancanto born
2001:

Marie D’Ancanto discovers her ability
Marie and Logan are brought to Xavier’s School
The X-Men stop Magneto in the Statue of Liberty
Logan leaves to figure out more about his past
2002:

Logan comes back to the school
William Stryker invades the school abducting students and Charles
The X-Men and Magneto break into Stryker’s base at Alkali Lake
Jean Grey dies saving the team
Colossus and Kitty Pryde join the X-Men
2003:

Worthington Labs develops a cure for the x-gene
Jean returns as the Phoenix, killing Scott and later Charles
X-Men and the Brotherhood of Mutants battle it out
Logan kills Jean
Logan then leaves the school
2012:

Ichiro Yashida sends Yukio to search for Logan
2013:

The Wolverine Movie

ENDING ONE TIMELINE
2013:

Trask Industries invades and occupies X-Mansion
Trask Industries announces the updated Sentinel program
2015:

Charles and Erik find Logan in an Airport and tell them that they need his help
Beast (Hank) is killed
2023:

Mutants are almost extinct – the war is reaching an end
Wolverine’s conscious is sent back in time
Logan is successful changing the timeline from 1973 on
Logan wakes up to find the X-Men alive and the War of the Sentinels never happened
1973:

2023 Logan wakes up in his younger body
Wolverine from 2023 wakes in his younger body
Logan, Charles, Hank, and Peter break Erik out of prison
Mystique is prevented from killing Bolivar Trask
Erik turns against them
Trask Industries unveils the Sentinels Program
Wolverine and Hank fight Erik and a Sentinel while Charles tries to convince Mystique to spare Trask at the White House
The Sentinels Program is canceled and Trask is arrested for selling military secrets
Mystique, under the guise of William Stryker, raises Logan from the Potomac River

ENDING TWO TIMELINE
2015:

Logan goes back to the school where he finds Charles alive
2018:

Laura is born with her paternal DNA coming from Wolverine
2024:

Deadpool and an alternate Wolverine work together to stop Cassandra Nova from destroying the Multiverse
The TVA allows Laura to come back to her own timeline despite her younger self still being there
The TVA allows Wolverine to come to Laura and Wade’s timeline despite his alternative self still being alive
2026:

Charles suffers a massive psychic seizure that injures over 600 people and killing several X-Men
Logan takes Charles to Mexico, hiding him away so Charles’ deteriorating mind can’t hurt anybody
2029:

The Logan Movie
2035:

Laura is sent to the Void by the TVA
Deadpool time jumps to dig up Wolverine’s body

Chapter Text

It was snowing, but that didn’t matter. Your insides were burning up to the point that you couldn’t stop sweating, soaking through your clothes. There was practically a puddle of sweat beneath you as you pushed yourself further into the corner of your closet.

Your parents were downstairs, having a screaming match. It was their fifth one today. They had been too occupied with their own drama to even notice what was going on with you. A tremor had started in your hands as your fingertips began faintly glowing orange. You placed your hand against the wooden door as you heard the fighting die down. The silence was eery and before you knew it, a gun was going off. You rushed down the stairs, failing to notice the trail of fire being left behind.

Your father was standing above your mother, gun still pointed at her. Your mother was lying on the ground with a bullet in her forehead.

“Go back upstairs, Y/N,” your father demanded, not sparing you a single glance.

“What did you do?” You frantically cried.

“What she had coming,” your father responded. “She wasn’t like us, Y/N. She was— is that smoke?” Your father looked over to see the stairs in flames. “We’ve got to get out of here.” When your father grabbed your arm, only to quickly let it go when his skin burned. “You… You did this!” He pointed the gun at you. “You’re a monster just like her!”

“I— I’m sorry, Dad! I don’t know what’s happening!”

“I do, monster.”

Your father pulled the trigger and your arm came up to try to protect you. Fire shot out of your hand, landing on your father. He screamed out as the fire quickly spread over him. You cried as you watched your father stumble back into the fire engulfing the stairs.

Yells and screams began cutting through the growing flames as the neighbors gathered outside. Realizing how this could look, you hurried out the back and continued running. What had you done?

~~~

It didn’t take you long to figure out that you had powers of some kind in the form of fire. Now living on the streets, you used your power to keep alive. You discovered your second ability when another homeless person went after you with a knife, cutting your arm. It healed, simply leaving a scar, after a few hours. It was 1965 and you had just turned 35 when you realized that you had stopped aging years ago. This forced you to move around more to keep from being caught.

Coming back from a heist with your bag full, you entered the alley that you were currently calling home. With a slight twitch of your fingers, you lit the trash in the nearby barrel to warm up the alley and provide some light.

“Some power you got there.”

You jumped at the voice, immediately forming flames in your hands. A man stepped out of the shadows, a mischievous glint in his eye.

“Who are you?” You asked.

“Major William Stryker and you are Y/N L/N.”

“How do you know that?”

“I’ve been following you for quite some time.” He sat on a cart next to the barrel. “Tell me, did you mean to start that fire? Or was it a product of what happened to your mother?”

You grit your teeth. “How could you possibly know that?”

“I know things. Like what you are.”

“And?”

“You’re a mutant and someone special. I would like you to come with me. You’ll get training in your abilities and other skills. We could use you on the team I’m putting together.” He could tell you were considering it. “I know that you’ve been on your own and homeless for far too long. You would never have to worry about food, clothes, or a bed again. Not if you’re with me.”

“How do I know I can trust you?”

“You don’t. You’ll just have to come and see.”

You thought about it. This could be your chance to do something more. To learn about your powers and grow them in ways you didn’t think possible. The promise of the basic necessities was also night.

But there was also a chance that the man in front of you was trying to trick you. Taking a breath, you made a decision.

“I’ll go with you.”

~~~

Though the training was hard and the tests they constantly ran on your powers were draining, you never complained. Stryker had held up his end of the promise, providing you with food, clothes, and a place to sleep. He kept talking about his dreams for the team he was putting together and other mutants soon joined.

First, there was Fred Dukes, who possessed super strength and invulnerability. Next, John Wraith, a teleporter, and Chris Bradley or Bolt, who could control electricity. Agent Zero was next as an expert marksman with Wade Wilson, a swordsman who could never shut up, quickly following.

The six of you made an odd bunch and went out on regular missions for Stryker. You never fully understood what the point of these missions where, but you went on them anyway.

“Wade, I will melt those blades if you poke me one more time.”

The team had a day off, meaning that you were stuck in Stryker’s facility for the team until you were needed. The others had decided to plan a game of poker while you decided to read, with Wade choosing to annoy you.

“Where does the fire live?” Wade asked. “Like, is there an ember constantly lit inside of you? And why isn’t your skin hot?”

“Wade…”

“I’m just curious!” He threw his hands up. “Like how does the fire work? Do you— Hey!” Wade’s clothes burned off of him, leaving him naked. “If you wanted to fuck, you could have just asked.”

“Ew,” you cringed, moving away from him.

“Wilson!” John shouted. “Get some clothes on!”

“Why? You jealous?” Wade retorted with a smirk. He stood up and walked over to where the others were sitting. “Take a good look, boys. Take a look and wish you had this body.”

“Wilson!” Stryker exclaimed as he entered the room, with two other men trailing behind him. “Get your clothes on! We have new recruits.”

“Yes, sir,” Wade mock saluted before walking off.

You peeked over your book to get a look at them. Both of the men were muscular and clearly had their walls up. The one with shorter hair seemed more menacing than the man next to him. The man next to him caught your attention more. More emotions were swirling in his eyes. His hair was long, dark, and thick with mutton chops covering his cheeks.

“Sorry, gentlemen,” Stryker apologized. “That was Wade Wilson.” You stood up as Stryker introduced the other members of the team before ending with you. “And this is Y/N L/N.”

“A woman is on this team?” The menacing one scoffed. “No wonder you brought us in.”

“Don’t doubt, Y/N. Her ability to control fire can do more damage than your claws.”

“And you two are?” You questioned, getting annoyed again.

“This is my brother Victor Creed,” the other man introduced. He held out his hand to you. “I’m James. James Logan Howlett.”

You shook his hand briefly. “Nice to meet you, James. Welcome to the team.”

Chapter Text

You had basically stayed clear of your new teammates in the week they had been there. You weren’t exactly the welcoming type, focused on not being homeless again. You spent most of your time in your room or working on your abilities. Stryker had made sure there was a firepower room in the facility so that you had a safe place to practice, which others rarely entered.

Fire filled the room as you practiced your powers: throwing the fire, heating and melting items, as well as building walls for protection. As you practiced, you failed to notice James slip into the room. He had gone looking for something to light his cigar and he followed the smell of smoke. When he opened the door and saw you maneuvering the flames, he was mesmerized. James hadn’t known what to think of you, especially when you were clearly avoiding him and Victor. You were a beautiful woman but there was a fire inside of you that he wanted to know more about.

Still not noticing that you had an audience, you shot flames out of your hands at the wall that James was leaning against.

“Shit!” James exclaimed as he jumped away from the fire, his shirt getting singed. With a twist of your wrists, the flames around the room disappeared. “You may want to watch where you're shooting those flames, sweetheart.”

You shrugged. “Didn’t see you. I normally don’t have an audience.”

“Clearly.” James pushed himself off the wall and headed towards you. You noticed the cigar between his fingers and lit it. A flash of surprise went across James’ face. “Thanks.” He took a drag of his cigar before letting the smoke billow out of his mouth. The earthy smell took over your senses and you didn’t mind. “I wanted to apologize for Victor.”

“It’s fine. I’m used to it.”

“Doesn’t make it right.”

You tilted your head slightly as you studied James. Just from the few interactions you had with him, it was clear that James was constantly picking up after his brother. You wondered why.

“You’ve got some ability,” James commented.

“It’s come in handy from time to time. Do you have an ability? I assume you do because Stryker’s really only interested in mutants.”

James held up a fist as three bone claws extended from his knuckles. You couldn’t help but reach out and gently touch them. James watched in wonder. No one had ever looked at his claws the way you were currently, with awe and not fear.

“Is it the same on the other hand?” You asked, fingers still running over the claws.

“Yes,” James responded. When you finally pulled away, James retracted his claws.

“Does that hurt? When they break through your skin?”

James was taken even more back now. No one had ever asked him that. No one had ever cared. “Every time… Does, uh, do the flames hurt your skin?”

“No,” you shook your head. “Well, as long as they come from me.”

James nodded, not knowing what to say next but he did know that he wanted to get to know you more.

“I’m going to go clean up,” you tell him. “See you around, James.”

He nodded, watching you slip out of the room.

~~~

James may not know you well, but he did know one thing. He hated it when Wade was around you. Wade was constantly propositioning you or being incredibly inappropriate. Victor occasionally joined in as well. You simply ignored the comments while James was growing furious.

“Maybe if we both take our shirts off then she’ll—“

“That’s enough,” James growled, cutting off Wade. You were sitting close by, trying to ignore the men by reading a book.

“You want to get in on this Howlett? Or are you just jealous that we have the balls to—“

“I said that’s enough!” Suddenly, James had his claws at Wade’s neck.

“Calm down there, kitty.”

“James, it’s alright,” you told him, standing up. “Let Wade go.”

“Listen to your master, kitty.”

James shoved Wade with a grunt as his claws disappeared. Suddenly, Wade’s hair burst into flames. He began to freak out as you laughed, leaving the room. James followed, the anger still controlling him. You entered your room, leaving the door open for James. He found you and leaned against the door frame.

“You don’t need to fight by battles, James,” you told him as you tidied up.

“They shouldn’t be talking about you like that,” his voice was still rough and filled with anger.

“I’m used to it. People talked before Stryker found me.”

James had never heard about your life before this and was interested to learn more. He stepped into the room and closed the door before leaning against it.

“I was homeless for years,” you continued. “I used my abilities to steal but that never gave me a bed to sleep in. So, sometimes, I would sell my body for money and a bed for a night.” James inhaled sharply. “Sometimes there were multiple men and women involved. They often talked about my body like I wasn’t even there. I just ignore it.”

“I’m sorry.”

You looked at him curiously. “What for?”

“You shouldn’t have had to deal with any of that and continue to deal with it.”

You shrugged. “The price I pay to meet my basic needs.”

“Doesn’t make it right, sweetheart.”

“Well, there’s nothing I can do to change that… This life is better than homelessness.”

James hated how right you were and how okay you were with the way the others treated you. He wished so badly that he could fix it and he would do his best to try.

~~~

While the other men continued to talk the way they did, James made sure to continue to be sweet and gentle with you. He tried to not make it obvious, saving some things for when the two of you were alone. You wouldn’t admit it, but your interactions with James were making you feel things you never thought you would. You enjoyed how sweet and caring he was, always looking out for you during missions and making sure you were okay afterward. The two of them began training together, eating together, and even just sitting in silence together. You would be reading while he puffed at a cigar. It was nice. The closest thing you could get to domestic bliss in your life.

James hated flying, which you quickly realized on his first mission with the team. That is why you were currently sitting next to him on the jet. He was leaning forward, elbows on his thighs, with his hands together, almost like he was praying. You were sitting close enough that your thighs were brushing each other, hoping that the small touch would help.

“You know, I love this weapon more than any other thing in the whole wide world,” Wade said as he sharpened one of his swords. “Do you wanna know why?”

“No,” Victor replied.

“It’s memorable. Sure, it’s a little bulky, tough to get on a plane. You whip out a couple of cowards at your ex-girlfriend’s wedding, they will never, ever forget it.”

“That’s funny, Wade. I think you confuse me with someone who gives a shit.”

“Right, it’s probably not as intimidating as having a gun or bone claws or fire. Or even the fingernails of a bag lady.” Victor’s claws grew out while Wade gripped his sword tighter. Wade held up his sword filer. “Manicure?”

“Victor,” James tone was one of warning, “easy.”

“Fred got a new tattoo. I’m concerned.” Wade was always one to jump from topic to topic.

James looked past you to see the new tattoo on Fred’s arm. “Oh, geez, Fred, you just met her last night.”

“I love her,” Fred said, getting emotional.

“You love her after one night?”

“She’s a gymnast.”

“I’m sure she’s great,” you told Fred, patting his leg.

“Bradley, take her down,” Stryker ordered. The jet began to descend with a turn.

“Oh, God,” James groaned, leaning forward again.

“Are you gonna puke?” Fred asked, taking a bite of a protein bar.

“If we were meant to fly, we’d grow wings.”

“Don’t worry, Nancy,” Zero said. “More people die driving than flying.”

“How about from impaling?”

“Hey, be nice,” John told James, “or be your approximation of nice. Would you like a bucket?”

“No,” James grunted as he tried to calm his stomach.

You placed a hand on his back, rubbing small circles on it. You could not care less about the others watching you and James.

“Gentlemen, Y/N, wheels down in Lagos in five,” Stryker announced.

~~~

Stryker led the team to a taller building at the edge of the city. It was heavily guarded with tanks and armed men.

“Why are we here?” James asked.

“All in good time,” responded Stryker. “Zero?”

Zero stepped up, getting all the guns aimed at him before he started firing. He flipped over the large fence as he fired and defeated the men he could see.

“Having fun yet?” Victor asked you and James before he ran over to the gate Zero had just opened.

Victor ran to the building and began using his claws to scale it. The team heard a tank arm up nearby.

“Fred?” Stryker called.

“The tank?” Fred wondered.

“The tank.”

“Yeah, I got that.”

Fred came over to the tank and punched his fist into it before the controller fired. The shot hit Fred’s fist before backfiring, exploding the tank. Stryker led the rest of you into the building and onto the elevator. Bradley, Wade, and John were standing in front, near the doors, while Fred, Stryker, James, and yourself were in the back. James made sure that you were in the corner so that he could cover you if needed. The elevator was playing office music before the power was cut and it stopped.

“Great,” Wade said. “Stuck in an elevator with five guys on a high-protein diet and a fiery bitch.”

“Watch it, bud,” James growled.

“Wade,” Stryker warned.

“Dreams really do come true.”

“Just shut it! You’re up next.”

“Thank you, sir. You look really nice today. It’s the green. It brings out the seriousness in your eyes. Though the black really brings out Y/N’s—“

“Oh my God. Do you ever shut up, pal?” James could never stand Wade for long periods of time.

“No. Not when I’m awake.”

“Bradley? Top floor, please,” Stryker requested.

Bradley quickly used his powers to bring the elevator up to the top floor. As soon as the elevator reached the top floor, James pushed you further into the corner and covered you. Stryker moved to stand between you two and Bradley. The doors opened and gunshots immediately followed. Wade twirled his words around, effectively preventing himself from taking a bullet. It wasn’t long until everyone was dead beside the boss at the front desk.

“Okay. People are dead,” Wade announced.

“If you didn’t have that mouth on you, Wade, you’d be the perfect soldier,” Stryker stated as he walked out of the elevator and toward the sole survivor.

James made sure that you were at his side, always ready to jump in to protect you at a moment’s notice. The sole survivor reached for a gun from under his desk but John teleported, quickly stopping him.

“I wouldn’t do that if I was you, brother,” John warned.

“Take the diamonds,” the man said. “They’re yours.”

“I don’t want your diamonds,” replied Stryker. “I want this.” He took a piece of rock that was sitting on the man’s desk.

“But that is nothing. A souvenir.”

“Where did you find it? I want the source.”

“A small village, far inland, three days from here.”

~~~

Mere hours later, the team was in that small village. The villagers had been gathered up, kept close together by a ring of fire you were controlling. Stryker was holding up the stolen rock to the village leader while Wade was there translating.

“I don’t like this,” James muttered to you. The heat you had created had forced him to take off his shirt, leaving his white tank top.

“Me either,” you responded. You glanced around as Wade and Stryker talked to the village leader. The villagers were all terrified and you hated that you were a part of that.

“He’s telling the truth,” James tried to vouch for the leader.

“You don’t know the language, Logan,” Stryker dismissed.

“It’s a meteor fragment.”

“I know what it is. I’m asking him where he found it.”

“Sir,” Bradley called, “base wants to know our location.”

“Shut them down.”

“Yes.”

Stryker leaned toward the kneeling leader. “Tell him everyone here will die unless he tells me where he the found rock.”

Wade quickly translated and received a response. “He says that it’s sacred.”

“Okay, fine,” Stryker stood up straight and turned to Victor. “Victor.” He placed a hand on the mutant’s shoulder before walking a few steps away, keeping his back to everyone.

Victor quickly killed the reader, causing the villagers to cry out. You extinguished the circle of flames as the other members of the team began killing the villagers. You stumbled back at the sight forcing James to steady you. In all your time with this team, you had never gone after innocents. James ran towards Victor grabbing his wrist before he could kill another innocent man.

“Victor!” James roared. “Don’t even think about it.” You noticed that your other teammates gripped their weapons tighter, prepared to fight each other. “We didn’t sign up for this. Put him down.”

Victor let go of the villager as he ripped his wrist from James’ grip. “What are you doing?” Victor questioned through panting breaths. “We finally got a good thing going here. Don’t you screw this up.”

“Enough. That’s enough. We’ve done enough.”

“Who do you think you are? This is what we do. Maybe you’d rather be rotting in a hole somewhere till they figure out a way to do it to us. Is that it? Huh?”

“I’m done. You coming?” When Victor didn’t give an immediate answer. James turned and walked to you. “Y/N. Come with me.”

“I—I can’t,” you were terrified of losing the comfort you had found.

“I promise that you will have a bed and food and clothes. I will take care of you.”

“Don’t do it, Y/N,” Stryker said, taking a step forward. “He can’t make those promises. You’ll be back on the streets.”

“I will never let that happen.” He held out his hand. “Come with me.”

You briefly looked past James to see Stryker angrily staring you down before you focused back on James. With a shaky hand, you reached out and took James’. He squeezed it before he began leading you away.

“Jimmy!” Victor yelled, causing James to stop and turn. “We can’t just let you two walk away.” James ripped off his dog tags before throwing them to the ground, you quickly did the same.

James made sure he had a good grip on your hand before the two of you disappeared into the forest, Victor calling after James.

Chapter Text

James kept his promise to you, no matter how hard it was. While the two of you tried to figure out what you’d do now, James made sure you always had a bed to sleep on, clean clothes to wear, and food to eat. You had never been cared for like this. Yes, at one point you had parents, but they didn’t necessarily care a whole lot about you. Not the way James did.

The two of you wandered from place to place until James decided to build a house in the Canadian Rockies. James got a job as a logger and began going by Logan, while you got a job as a teacher. James hardly slept as he worked on the house. The house was completed faster than you had ever seen. The two of you were only able to afford one small truck, but neither of you minded. Often, James would drive the two of you to his work and then you would take the truck to yours. You would pick him up at the end of the day and he would drive the two of you home.

Like driving to and from work, the two of you found yourselves in comfortable routines. The two of you would make dinner together and help each other clean up around the house. You would take turns doing laundry for one other, even putting the clothes away. It got to the point where you spent a lot of time in content silence, already knowing what to do for the other person.

The feelings the two of you harbored for one another continued to grow in the two years the two of you had been off of Stryker’s team. Neither of you was willing to confess to the other, afraid to ruin the peace that the two of you had finally found. That also meant that James slept on the pull-out couch while you slept on the bed in the bedroom. At first, you had put up a fight, saying that the bed was big enough to share, but he wouldn’t allow it due to his nightmares. You understood as you had witnessed his claws coming out during a nightmare just as he had witnessed you setting a bed on fire.

James had been watching you carefully ever since you picked him up from work. Something was off, he just couldn’t tell what. You were quieter than usual, almost like you were stuck in your own head. He sat there, staring at you with a cigar in his mouth, as you did the dishes. It was normal for you to light his cigars without even being asked, but you hadn’t even noticed he had one out.

“Sweetheart,” James called, standing up and heading for you. “Did something happen today at work?”

“Hmm?” You hummed barely glancing his way. “Oh, nothing. I’m just tired.”

“Are you sure?” He leaned his hip against the counter beside you, crossing his arms over his chest. “You can tell me if something did happen.”

“I’m fine, James,” you shook your head.

James grabbed your wrist and tugged you to face him. “Stop lying.”

“I’m not,” you tore your wrist away, still not making eye contact. “I’m going to bed… Goodnight, James.”

James sighed as you disappeared into the bedroom. He wished that you would be honest with him about whatever was torturing you. Unable to sleep, James read or at least, he tried to. It was well past midnight when he smelt it. Something burning. He jumped up and rushed into the bedroom to find the bed on fire with you still asleep and whimpering in the middle of it.

“Y/N!” He shouted as he tried to reach you, but the flames grew higher to protect you. “Y/N!”

James tried again to reach for you, only for the same thing to happen. Quickly, James tore off his tops. Knowing he would heal, James reached through the fire. He let out a few cries of pain as the fire scorched his skin. As soon as his hands grasped your arm, you gasped as the flames disappeared.

“James?” You were panting as you realized he had a hold of your arm. Looking at him, you saw the burns on his skin healing. “Oh my gosh! What did I do?!”

“I’m fine, sweetheart. I’m healing.” You tried to pull away from him but his grip tightened. “Stop that. You’ll hurt yourself.”

“I hurt you,” tears pooled in your eyes. “I hurt you.”

“Look at me, Y/N, I’m healing.”

You could see his skin repairing itself right before your eyes but you couldn’t get your mind to believe it. James easily pulled you into him and carried you out of the room. The smell of smoke lingered in the air, bringing the tears out of your eyes. James held you tighter as he laid down on his pull-out bed in the living room. You cried into his chest as he held you, trying his best to comfort you.

Eventually, your cries died out and sleep took hold of you. James made sure that you were completely asleep before he slipped you off of him, tucked you in, and headed to the bedroom. He wanted to clean up the bedroom before you woke up. Going in there, he quickly realized that there was no saving anything on the bed, mattress included. He stuffed the pillows, blankets, and sheets into garbage bags. He placed them in the bed of the truck before taking the mattress there as well. James was sweeping the bedroom when he heard you.

“James?” Your voice was rough from sleeping and crying.

He hurried into the living room and sat down beside you. “I’m here.”

“Hold me.”

James didn’t need to be told a second time. Before you knew it, he was under the covers and you were practically lying on top of him. Your fingers began to absentmindedly draw patterns on his chest. James remained silent, waiting to see if you would speak up.

“Thirty-two years ago, my father murdered my mother and then I murdered him,” you quietly admitted. You had never talked about your parents or anything besides being homeless before Stryker found you. James would be the first, besides maybe Stryker, to know what had happened. “He murdered her because she was a mutant… I didn’t even know that… I don’t know what her mutation was…” James’ thumbs rubbed against you, to let you know that he was listening. “I didn’t know I was a mutant until that night. I started the house fire without even knowing it… I killed my father without even trying…”

“Was he going to hurt you?” James’ voice was struggling to hold back the anger.

“Yes… his gun was pointed at me.”

“Then it was self-defense. You did nothing wrong.”

“When the anniversary comes up, I can’t help but replay that night over and over again in my mind… I guess I let it seep through while I was sleeping… I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to apologize for.” He kissed your forehead. “‘M glad you’re okay.”

“Thank you for being here, James.”

“Don’t want to be anywhere else.”

~~~

The next morning, James woke up to you curled against him, sleeping soundly. He hated the idea of moving away from you but he wanted to go get a new bed before you could freak. Kissing your head, he slipped out of bed and got ready for the day. He left a note in the kitchen before leaving.

You whined as you began to wake. Without opening your eyes, you could tell that James was no longer lying next to you. Did he stay with you the whole night? Did you make him uncomfortable that he slept on the floor? You finally opened your eyes and sat up with a stretch. Looking around, you could see James, or even hear him.

“James?” You called. “James?”

You sighed when there was no response. You knew he could be out doing chores, but his hearing usually allowed for him to hear you. Standing up, you headed for the kitchen, where you found the note he left you on the counter.

Sorry, I left while you were asleep. Had a few errands to run and I didn’t want to bother you. Be back later. ~ James

You knew that James would be gone until dinner time since the two of you lived far away from the nearest town. Going into the bedroom, you realize that he had gone to get a new bed. You spent the day tidying up the house and getting dinner ready for whenever James returned home.

“Y/N?” James called as he entered the house with multiple bags slung over his arms. “I’m home.”

“Hey,” you greeted coming to help him.

“I got new pillows, sheets, and a bed out in the truck.”

“I could have come with you.”

“’s fine. Wanted you to rest.”

“Well, thank you.”

He smiled at you, something that was happening more and more. “Of course.”

After the new bed was inside and all put together, you and James sat down to eat. You both were silent, a question gnawing at you. James could tell, yet again, that something was on your mind.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” James suddenly asked.

Sucking your lips in for a brief moment, you thought about a response. “I… I have a question.”

“Okay.”

“You have every right to say no. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I know that—“

James set a hand on yours, calming your rambles. “Ask.”

“Can you… can you sleep with me tonight?” You cringed as the words left your mouth. “And I don’t mean sexually. It’s just that last night, after the nightmare— Well, I didn’t know I could sleep that well and I—“

“Breathe, sweetheart. Slow down and breathe.” You took a few deep breaths, earning you a small smile from James. “If it helps you sleep, I’ll be there.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

~~~

The two of you stood on either side of the bed, the awkward tension filling the room. You eventually laid under the covers first, trying your best to stay on your side of the bed. James followed suit.

“Is this okay?” James whispered.

“Mhm,” you hummed with a nod.

Silence fell between the two of you, both of you wide awake but staring at the ceiling. You moved your hand slightly, accidentally brushing James’ hand. Before you could completely pull away, he took your hand and pushed his fingers through yours.

“Is this okay?” He asked again. James surprised even himself with the action as he was always too worried about holding hands due to his claws.

“Mhm.”

His thumb began rubbing the top of your hand. Slowly, your eyes closed and you fell asleep. James wasn’t too far behind you.

~~~

There was something on top of him as James began to wake, but it didn’t worry him. Peeking his eyes open, he also your head on his chest and arm slung over him with one of your legs between his. You were sound asleep. James smiled as he studied the way your face was relaxed against him. The way your breathing was a steady rhythm. You looked more at peace than he had ever seen you. He only wished it could always be this way, which is why he didn’t allow himself to move until you were awake.

It took until you opened your eyes to realize that you were lying on top of James. With a sharp breath, you tried to push yourself off of him, but his arms would not allow it.

“Stay,” he mumbled, having fallen back asleep. “Sleep.” You smiled as you obeyed, getting comfortable again.

This became a new routine: you and James falling asleep on opposite sides of the bed, only to wake up cuddled together. It went on smoothly for months before anything happened.

James was quiet. All you knew is that someone died at work and it must’ve affected him. You let James be, allowing him silence during dinner and keeping your distance when you both went to bed. You wished him a quiet goodnight before slipping off to sleep. That slumber didn’t last long as you felt a sharp pain in your arm. You woke up with a gasp, sitting up. Looking at your arm, there were three bleeding scratches. Next to you, James’ skin was glistening with sweat. He was breathing heavily and his claws were out.

“James—“

He woke up with a roar, sitting up quickly. You pushed yourself off the bed to miss his claws that came down, cutting the sheets. His roar turned into a growl then turned into panting as his eyes found you on the floor. He looked down at one of his hands and retracted his claws. You stood up and sat on the edge of the bed. James’ nightmares were not new to you, but they hadn’t happened since the two of you began sharing a bed. You had a good guess that whatever happened at work had triggered something inside of him.

“Was it the wars?” You asked softly. He shakily nodded, trying to calm himself down. “Which one?”

“All of ‘em.”

You moved closer to him as his hand combed through his hair. Placing your hand on his face, you gently forced him to look at you.

“Tell me,” you requested.

“Hey…” He grabbed your arm, seeing the scratches from his claws. “I hurt you.”

“It’s just a scratch. I’ll heal.”

“No.” He shook his head. “I hurt you.”

“James, I’m fine. Look.” He looked at your arm again. “It’s healing as we speak.”

“But it’ll scar…” He let go of your arm and flipped the covers off of himself. “I’m sleeping on the pull-out.”

You grabbed his arm before he could stand. “No, you’re not. I’m fine… lay back down, please.”

“No. I can’t risk hurting you.”

“Are you forgetting that I burnt you a few months ago?”

“This is different. I don’t scar.”

“But I still heal. Who cares if I get a scar?”

“I do… I don’t want to be the one to hurt you.”

You put your hand on his face again as you came up to sit beside him. “You’d hurt me by getting up and leaving… Don’t… please.”

“I don’t trust myself.”

“I trust you.” You glanced at his lips. “I trust you, James.”

You crashed your lips to his, moving your hand to have a better hold of his face. His hands went to your hips, gripping them tightly. When you pulled away, you looked him in the eye.

“I trust you, James,” you repeated. “Let me show you just how much.”

Chapter Text

That night changed everything. Without even needing a conversation, you woke up that morning a couple. Their routine remained mostly the same except for the added hand-holding, cuddling, kissing, and lots of sex.

There was also the fact that the two of you opened up to each other more. Before it was brief pieces of needed information but now the two of you knew each other’s whole life stories. It felt relieving to finally have someone who knew the whole of you and to have someone that you knew completely.

The two of you had left the team seven years ago now and officially been a couple for five. You had built yourselves a nice, stable life. It was everything you never knew you wanted or even needed. Except, you had noticed James was beginning to pull away. He was clearly nervous or bothered by something, but would never open up when you asked. Even as you sat in the passenger seat while James drove you two to his work.

“The steering wheel will break if you keep clutching it like that,” you said. You watched as he loosened his grip. James kept his eyes on the road like it was impossible to look your way. “What is going on, James?”

“Nothing,” he muttered.

You scoffed. “Okay. Keep lying to me.”

“I ain’t lying.”

“Whatever.”

The rest of the ride to his work was silent. You stared out your open window, trying to focus on the surroundings instead of the tears that were threatening to pour out of your eyes. When you reached the lumber yard, James threw the truck into park, got out, and grabbed his tools from the trunk.

“See you, baby,” he mumbled before heading towards the truck full of his coworkers.

You slid across the bench seat to the driver’s side and swung open the door. “Hey!” You called, standing up.

James briefly glanced at his coworkers before heading back to you. “Sorry,” he whispered before you pulled him in for a kiss.

His coworkers whistled and commented until James broke the kiss and headed over to them. You watched as James joined them in the truck. He shot you a smile as they drove off. With a sigh, you got back in the car and drove yourself to work.

~~~

Your work day was long, but not because of the students you were teaching. Your mind was on James and what was going on with him. After all these years, you thought you had told each other everything. Maybe you were wrong. Or maybe, he was growing tired of you. That fear gnawed away at you through the school day and into the car ride to pick up James. You were already waiting in the passenger seat when he got off work. He put his tools in the trunk before slipping into the driver’s seat.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said, leaning over for a kiss. You didn’t move and he reluctantly settled for kissing your cheek.

The long drive home was full of awkward tension. When you finally pulled up to the house, you got out of the car and slammed the door before marching inside. James’ brows furrowed as he followed you.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” He asked.

“What's wrong?” You spun around to face him. “I’ve been asking you that for a week now! And you never give me a straight answer!”

“I’ve just had a lot going on and—“

“I thought we talked to each other… I thought we told each other everything.”

“We do. It’s just—“

“Do you want to end this?”

“What?” James practically stumbled at your words.

“Are you going to break up with me?”

“No, no, no, no, no,” James shook his head, rushing over and taking your hands. “Never. Absolutely not.”

“Then what is going on? Talk to me.”

James sighed. He pulled one hand away from yours and dug into his jeans pocket. You gasped as he pulled out a ring. “I’ve been nervous about proposing… I wanted it to be perfect and a surprise but I guess I got too caught up in my head. I’m sorry.”

“You… you want to propose?” You were in complete shock. This had never crossed your mind in all your worrying.
“Yes. I want to marry you.”

“Then ask me.”

James was quick to get down on one knee and hold up the ring. “Y/N L/N, will you marry me?”

“Yes.” You smiled as a few stray tears slipped down your face.

James smiled widely back up at you before sledding the ring on your finger. You pulled him up to you and kissed him. “I love you so much, baby.”

“I love you, too.”

~~~

That night was full of passion like the two of you had never experienced before. Eventually, you both fell asleep. James was the one to wake up first. He kissed your head before slipping out of bed, pulling some sweatpants on, and heading outside. You woke to the cool breeze of the morning air hitting your naked body. Looking up, you realized that the door was open. You slipped on James’ flannel that had been tossed to the floor last night before following him outside.

“Why are you up so early?” You asked.

James turned around at the sound of your voice. He almost lost his breath at the sight of you in his shirt. It wasn’t a new occurrence, but he would never get used to your beauty.

He smiled at you and held an arm out. “Come here.”

You quickly headed to him, letting him wrap his arms around you. You leaned in and kissed him softly before your head settled on his bare chest.

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” you whispered.

“We can,” he responded.

“We’ll have to move sooner rather than later. People will begin to notice that we don’t age.”

“We will still have us. No matter where we are. We still have us.”

~~~

James dropped you off at the school before heading to the lumberyard. The boys there were happy to hear that he had finally manned up. James and his coworker were currently turning logs into planks of wood. The cigar in his mouth wasn’t lit, more for comfort than anything. A familiar scent crossed his nostrils, causing him to stand up straight. He could hear a car park not too far behind him.

“Who the hell is this?” His coworker asked.

James sighed. “Smells like government.”

He grabbed his ax before turning around to face the intruders. William Stryker and Agent Zero were standing in front of the car.

“My God. You haven’t aged a day!” Stryker exclaimed.

“Clean living,” James replied, holding up his cigar.

“You remember Agent Zero?” Stryker motioned to the man using a newspaper.

“Still shooting first, asking questions later?”

Zero whipped out his gun, shooting James’ cigar, before hiding the weapon back in his coat. “You still chewing on cheap cigars?” Zero retorted. James spit out the cigar.

“Boys, please,” Stryker said. “How’s Y/N?”

James’ jaw clenched at the mention of your name. “She’s fine.”

“Good. I have a job for you. For the both of you.”

“We already have jobs.”

“Lumberjack and a teacher?” Zero laughed. “36 grand a year?”

“36 - five,” James corrected, “plus we haven’t had to kill anyone in a while.”

“Starting to miss it?”

“Right about now I am.”

“Yeah?”

“Zero,” Stryker cut in, “back to the car.”

Zero slowly began heading back.

“Attaboy,” James said, before clicking his tongue.

“You know,” Stryker started after Zero was in the car, “I’m not proud about the way things ended between us.”

“Conversation’s over.” James walked past Stryker, making sure to hit him with his shoulder, and headed for the truck.

“Playing Little House on the Prairie with Y/N,” Stryker followed after James, “I mean, that just isn’t you, Logan. It’s not Y/N either.”

James turned to face the man. “And you would know, huh?”

“I would.”

“What do you want, Stryker?”

Stryker handed over the newspaper. “Bradley was killed three days ago. Wade before that. I believe that someone is hunting down our old team.”

“Anyone else?”

“As far as I know, Victor is safe. But whoever it is has names, addresses.”

James pushed the newspaper back into Stryker’s chest. “Y/N and I can take care of ourselves.” He turned and got into the car.

“This is not about you, Logan.” Stryker leaned down to see into the window. “Your country needs you.”

“I’m Canadian.” James drove off, fighting the urge to speed as he headed for your work.

“I know you, Logan!” Stryker shouted after him. “I know who you are!”

You were the only thing on James’ mind as he drove. He needed to get to you before anyone else did. When he pulled up to the school, you were out front, helping the kids find their parents. You were surrounded by students who all wanted your attention. It made James smile. But he couldn’t help but worry about Stryker and the news he brought with him. You could see that something was wrong before you got in the truck.

“What’s wrong?” You asked as James drove home.

“Stryker came by today,” he told you.

Your stomach dropped. “What?”

“Don’t worry. I said no.”

“Why is he bothering us after all these years?”

“It seems someone is killing off members of our team. He says they know names and addresses… Bradley and Wade are gone.”

“Are we safe?”

James hated how scared you sounded. He took your hand and pressed a kiss to it. “I’ll make sure we are.”

You simply nodded, opting to stare out the window. James kept hold of your hand, hoping to ease the nerves he could sense building inside of you. Oh how much he would give to go back to last night, the joy and happiness that was there. Or even this morning as he held you outside of the home the two of you shared. But James had a sinking feeling that something was coming, something that would rock the peace you two had found here to its core.

~~~

After dinner, James sat on the couch. The full moon shone into the house, adding to the light from the crackling fireplace. James was still in a t-shirt and jeans while you had changed into a night dress that didn’t leave much to the imagination. The two of you were trying to ignore the events of the day, so you were grabbing James a beer.

“Why is the moon so lonely?” You asked randomly.

James turned to look at you. “Why?”

“‘Cause she used to have a lover.”

“Oh…” he nodded. “You tell this to the kids?”

“A school-appropriate version, yes. His name was Qu’e Qu’atsu and they lived in the spirit world together.” You headed over to him.

“Oh, this is a true story?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“All right.” James took the beer from you.

You pulled up your dress and placed your legs on either side of James’ lap. “And every night they would wander the skies together, but one of the other spirits was jealous.”

“Hmm.” James took a sip of beer but was still intently looking at you, making sure you knew that you had his undivided attention.

“Trickster wanted the moon for himself, so he told Qu’e Qu’atsu that the moon had asked for flowers. He told him to come to our world and pick her some wild roses. But Qu’e Qu’atsu didn’t know that once you leave the spirit world, you can never go back.”

“Hmm.”

“And every night he looks up at the sky and sees the moon and howls her name. But… he can never touch her again.”

“Wow… Coo Coo Ca Choo got screwed.”

“Qu’e Qu’atsu.” James laughed at your correction. You ran your fingers over his chin. “It means ‘The Wolverine’.”

“Yeah?” James set the beer down and pulled you closer. “I wouldn’t ever leave you,” he whispered, nose up against your face.

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

Chapter Text

“But it’s a Saturday, James,” you complained as you sat naked on the bed while James got dressed. “You shouldn’t have to work on a Saturday.”

James couldn’t help but laugh at how cuter your whining was. “I’m sorry, baby,” he replied with a smile. “Not all of us can afford to take weekends off.”

“Hey!” You pouted. “Don’t be like that.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He came over and pecked your lips. “Why don’t you get dressed and drive with me there?”

“Fine… I have some errands to run anyway.” You leaned in, kissing him again. “But next Saturday, you’re all mine.”

James chuckled. “Fine by me, sweetheart.”

~~~

James drove as the two of you headed to his work. He kept a hand on your knee the whole drive there. When you arrived, he parked and turned to face you.

“Love you, sweetheart,” he told you before kissing you.

“Love you too,” you replied when the took of you broke the kiss.

He got out of the car and you slipped over to the driver’s seat. Turning slightly, James shot you a smile before heading off with his coworkers. You drove off, heading to do some much-needed errands.

~~~

Hours later, you were on your way back to pick up James when you saw a man standing in the road, not too far in front of you. Immediately knowing who it was, you stopped the truck. Victor took slow steps towards you as you got out of the car.

“You don't want to do this, Victor,” you told him, feeling your hands begin to heat up.

“Actually,” his nails extended and he dragged them across the front of the truck, “this is exactly what I want to do.”

Victor lunged forward. You threw your arms out, directing a large flame towards him. He cried out as he stumbled a few steps back. You turned and ran off into the woods. You could hear him following. Throwing a fireball behind you, Victor narrowly dodged causing you to hit the truck instead. You were running out of energy, fast, having not trained or practiced your powers much since leaving the team.

Victor used a tree to fling himself at you, his nails pushing into your back. You cried out as you fell forward. His nails ripped down your back, leaving large gashes. He spun you around, slamming your open wounds into the ground. Suddenly, you felt something injected into your neck.

“Ah!” You cry out, another surge of pain.

Victor’s nails pressed into your neck as his hand curled around it. “Don’t worry, sweetheart,” he smiled, “you won’t be dead for long.” Squeezing your neck, he forced your world to go black.

~~~

James could smell the smoke before he heard cries of pain. His coworkers called out for him as he broke into a run in the direction he believed it was coming from.

“Y/N!” He shouted, knowing it was you. The smoke your abilities caused had a different scent, one he knew well. “Y/N!”

James ran until he reached the truck. Smoke billowed from the vehicle engulfed in flames. He ran to the driver’s side, trying to see if you were still in there. It didn’t know what to think when you weren’t. His eyes caught sight of the gashes up the front of the truck, causing his heart to plummet.

“Y/N!” He ran off, following the scent of the smoke and now your blood. “Y/N!”

James stumbled to a stop when he caught sight of your clothes through the trees.

“No,” he breathed out before stumbling toward you.

You were laid out behind some trees. Dirtied and bloodied. He could see the wounds that hadn’t healed and smell the grass that had burnt beneath you. James came crashing to his knees beside you, shaking hands trying to feel for a pulse along your neck. You were so cold. He didn’t realize how warm your powers kept you until this moment.

When he couldn’t find a pulse, James’ hands went around you, pulling you towards him. Tears of anger and sadness fell from his eyes and a roar built up inside of him. Throwing his head up, he let the screaming roar out, releasing the emotions held inside of him with it.

James’ head fell to your still chest as he sobbed. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He was supposed to keep you safe. You were supposed to marry him. The two of you were supposed to live long lives together. Now you were lying lifeless in his arms, your body not even healing yourself from the injuries that Victor had caused.

Victor. Anger grew towards the man James once called his brother. No more. A brother would not do this. Everything inside James was screaming to go after Victor. But what about you? What would he do with your body? You deserved more than to just be buried in the forest.

Grounding his teeth together, James stood up with your limp body in his arms. With a set determination, James carried you all the way to the place you once called home. It was no longer a home to him. Not without you. As gently as he could be, James changed you into a clean set of clothes. The ring on your finger caught his eye, forcing tears into them once again. He pulled the ring off of your finger and searched for one of your plainest and longest necklaces. He looped the ring through the necklace before clasping the chain around his neck.

James pulled the blanket from where it was tucked between the mattress and carefully wrapped your body up in it. He left you on the bed while he dug a hole near the edge cliff outside of your home. Crying, he placed you in the hole before covering you up and marking the grave with a plank of wood. He knelt next to the new grave, shoulders slumped and head hanging.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispered, voice breaking. “I should have been there… I should have protected you…” Sorrow transformed into anger. “I am going to find him and I am going to kill him.”

~~~

Stryker was walking through your now abandoned home, Agent Zero on his trail.

“Where is Logan now?” Stryker asked.

“The police were just called to a bar and nearby train depot,” Zero explained. “Victor injured Logan and left him there.”

“Good. They’ll take him to the hospital and I’ll talk to him there.” Stryker paused as he noticed something on the cliffside outside of the house. “Grab the shovel. I found her.”

Stryker walked outside while Zero went to get the shovel. He paused in front of the plank, marking the new grave.

“Shame,” Stryker muttered, “this is a beautiful view.”

Zero joined Stryker and began digging up your body. As soon as he was able, Zero pulled you out of the hole and set you on leveled ground. Zero cut through the blanket with a knife before he got a syringe out of his coat and jabbed it into your neck. You woke with a gasp before immediately being thrown into a coughing fit.

“James?” You rasped as the coughing died down.

You looked around and realized that you were on the ground near your home. Stryker and Zero were looming above you.

Stryker chuckled darkly as he crouched down beside you. “Not even close,” he responded. “And, if all goes to plan, you will never see him again.” Stryker stood up. “Get her to the Island and then meet me at Alkali Lake. I’ve got to make a hospital visit.”

Chapter Text

After passing out due to his fight with Victor, James was taken to the hospital.

“What do we got?” The doctor asked as he ripped open James’ shirt.

“Bar fight,” the nurse answered. “Multiple knife wounds.”

The doctor looked at James’ chest. “What is this, a joke? Guy’s fine.”

James’ eyes snapped open. He grabbed the doctor by the scrubs and pulled him closer before standing up. “Where is he?” James asked.

The doctor held up his hands. “Hey, hey, don’t—“

“I said, where is he?”

“I don’t know who he is.”

“I can help you,” Stryker said from the doorway.

James tossed the doctor aside as he marched towards Stryker. He took Stryker back the neck and slammed him against the wall. “For years, we’ve been here. No one knew us, and then you show up, and the next day she’s dead!”

“I tried to warn you.”

“Why didn’t you tell me it was Victor?!”

“I didn’t know!”

“Bullshit!” James slammed Stryker against the opposite wall. “Why?”

“I swear on my son’s life, I didn’t know!” James’ grip was tight and Stryker was losing oxygen. James let the man fall to the ground as he stepped toward the other wall. “Victor’s appetites were becoming too public. I had to lock him up. He felt I betrayed him. Went AWOL. He said he was coming after all of us.”

“You didn’t come to warn us, you came to save your own ass.” James stormed off.

“So what’s your plan, Captain?” Stryker called after James as he stood up. “You can’t beat him, Logan, you know you can’t!”

“I’m going to find him and kill him.”

“I can give you the tools to defeat him.” James stopped and turned back. “And we can still save the others.”

“You mean save yourself, right?”

“I promise you two things. You will suffer more pain than any other man can endure, but you will have your revenge.”

“I come with you, I’m coming for blood. No law. No code of conduct. You point me in the right direction, you get the hell out of my way.”

~~~

When you woke again, you were chained to a cool, metal table. You immediately noticed the various tubes and wires connected to you and the muzzle preventing you from speaking. A female doctor appeared in your vision. You tried to metal the chains and cuffs with your abilities but nothing happened. Then you tried to wiggle free.

“It’s pointless,” the doctor stated, not even bothering to look your way and focused on the readings in front of her. “We’ve muted your abilities so that we may run the needed tests.” You tried to speak, but it was muffled. “Also pointless. We couldn’t allow you to scream. Would have for you to waste the strength you have. No one is coming for you anyway.”

You wanted to argue with the woman, tell her that someone was coming for you. James would come for you. Save you from whatever this place was. But then you remembered that Victor had done something to make you appear dead. Your heart shattered into a million pieces as you could only guess what had happened. That Victor had displayed you out for James to find and most likely believed you were dead. James wouldn’t be coming for you.

Looking around, you took note that you seemed to be a large warehouse that was split into makeshift rooms. There were other tables nearby, clearly with bodies on them. Some of the bodies were covered in white sheets while others were not. The bodies you could see were of various ages, including children. But they all appeared to be dead.

“Don’t worry,” the doctor appeared in your vision. “You’ll be joining them soon.”

She lifted some sort of medical drill and pressed it into your arm. You tried to scream, but the muzzle prevented you from doing so. Just as the cuffs kept you firmly to the table and unable to move away as she drilled through you and into your bone. When the doctor had pulled out, you wanted to puke. Through glassy eyes, you watched as she came around you and did the same thing to your other arm. You tried your best to focus on James, but that only made your heartbreak worse.

There had never been a time when you wished for a different mutation than now. You wished that you could psychically reach out to James. That you could tell him that you loved him one last time, that perhaps you could hear him say it back to you. Then you would let Stryker win.

~~~

The helicopter ride to Alkali Lake was probably the only time James didn’t want to puke while flying. But he was too preoccupied with his need to kill Victor, to get revenge for you. Even as Stryker’s people stripped him down to nothing and drew a pattern on the front of his body, James’ sole focus was on you.

How he’d never see you smile or hear your laugh again. How he’ll miss the unique smell of your abilities. Or how James would never be able to hold your warm body against his own.

James laid down on the metal rate that was found at the top of the glass box at the center of the dimly lit concrete room. The glass box had some water in it, only confusing James as to what could possibly happen next. The people secured him to the metal grate as they finished prepping him.

“When it starts, whatever the reason is that you’re doing this, focus on that,” the woman suggested. “Maybe it will help.”

“Trust me, I’ve been through worse,” James responded.

“No, you haven’t.” The woman reached over and tried to grab onto the chain that carried your ring from around James’ neck.

“Don’t touch that!”

The woman pulled back. “Okay.” She walked away and passed Stryker. “We’re ready.”

“We’re gonna make you indestructible,” Stryker told James, “but first we’re gonna have to destroy you. You remember what we were looking for in Africa?”

“I remember,” James responded.

“Well, I found it. It helped us create a metal compound so strong that you will be able to withstand virtually anything.” Stryker circled James. “It’s called adamantium. I can’t put Victor down myself, Logan. To kill him, you’re gonna have to embrace the other side. Become the animal.”

“Let’s do this.”

“I almost forgot,” Stryker held up James’ old dog tags.

“I want new ones… unless you have Y/N’s.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t. What do you want them to say?”

“Wolverine.”

~~~

James drowned out everything around him and refocused all his attention back on you. You were his sole reason for continuing yet in a very different way than before. It used to be that you made him want to live. To stop fighting and have whatever he could call a normal life. Now, you were the reason he was jumping headfirst into the fight. James knew that you wouldn’t have liked him making decisions out of revenge, but it was all he had now.

“Let’s begin,” Stryker ordered.

The metal grate pulled James down into the glass tank of water. Hot, swirling drills lined up with the circles drawn on his body, with an added three to his face. Before he knew it the drills were plunging into him with a searing pain. James clenched his eyes shut as images of you and the sound of your voice, bounced through his mind.

“Nice to meet you, James. Welcome to the team.”

“Does that hurt? When they break through your skin?”

“I trust you, James… Let me show you just how much.”

“You… you want to propose?”

“I wish we could stay like this forever.”

“It means ‘The Wolverine’.”

James could feel his body failing and he willingly accepted it. Maybe, if he died, he could see you again. So he let the pain overwhelm him and his heart stopped.

Those outside the tank waited with bated breath to see if James would revive.

“Well, I guess he can die,” Zero commented.

Suddenly, the heart rate monitor picked up a few heartbeats, gradually growing steadier and steadier.

“Come on, old friend,” Stryker whispered. “Come back.”

“Heart rate rising,” the woman stated.

“Adamantium reservoir is depleted,” someone said.

“No rejection,” another person added. “Procedure completed.”

“We did it,” Stryker said with a grin. “Yes!”

“Are we taking him to the Island?” Zero asked.

“The Island? No. The bonding works. We’ll use his DNA for the 11 and our plans for weapon 12. Erase his memory.”

James’ eyes snapped open at Stryker’s words. He wouldn’t allow anyone to erase his memory—to take you even more from him than they had already. He would kill them all if he had to.

~~~

The helicopter was in flames as James walked up. Stryker was trying to reach Agent Zero over the radio, trying to find out if James was dead.

“Zero, is he dead? Is Logan dead?” Stryker asked. “Zero, come in.”

James tore the radio from Zero’s hands. “You tried to kill me,” he growled.

“Logan?”

“Where’s Victor?”

“Come back to base. I’ll explain everything. We’ll take Victor down together.”

“Wrong answer. After I kill Victor, I’m coming for you.”

“Logan, listen to me. If you go down this road, you’re not gonna like what you find.”

“You wanted the animal, Colonel. You got it.”

~~~

James found John Wraith in Las Vegas, still alive. He needed to know if John had any information on the island that Zero had spoken about. Upon seeing James, John led Logan up to his office above the fitness center he owned.

“What are you doing here, Logan?” John asked.

Logan sighed. “Stryker showed up and told me that Victor was killing off the team. The next day, Victor killed Y/N.”

“Y/N’s dead?” John tossed Logan a beer. “You sure it was Victor?”

“Yeah.”

“Y/N was a good one. Did you two ever—“

“We were engaged.” Logan took a long swig of the beer as the ring sitting on his chest felt like it was burning him.

“Damn. I’m sorry, man.”

Logan stood up and went over to the open window to watch the fighting below. “What the hell happened to him after I left?”

“He got worse. He felt like you abandoned him. Hell, we all felt like you and Y/N had abandoned us. But Victor, he had to prove he was better than you. Hunting and killing everything he was pointed at. Quit a few months later myself. Couldn’t take rounding them up.”

“Rounding who up?”

“Leave it alone.”

“Rounding who up, John?” John stood and tried to walk away. “Hey! Damn it, John!”

“We hunted our own kind, Logan. There’s a special place in hell for the things we did.”

“Mutants? Why?”

“Stryker said we’d be making a difference, protecting people from the bad ones.” John huffed, sitting back down. Logan sat too. “How are you gonna take Victor down, Logan?”

“Remember that stuff in Africa?”

“Yeah, I remember Africa. What about it?” Logan raised a fist and revealed his shiny new claws. “Damn. What’d they do to you, man?”

“Don’t ask… Listen, Zero said something about an island. Does that mean anything to you?”

“Nope. But maybe Dukes knows.”

~~~

John had warned James about how much weight Fred Dukes had gained, but that still didn’t prepare James for actually seeing him. Fred clearly knew something about the island but refused to tell James anything. Fred felt like James was making fun of him. Coming up with an idea, John had James fight Fred in the ring. James and Fred threw each other around, much to John’s enjoyment until James had enough. James got Fred on the ground and aimed his claws at him.

“Now, where’s Victor?” James asked.

“Let him sit up, Logan,” said John, coming into the ring to help. “And put the claws away.”

They Fred to sit up against the post but he was close to passing out. James smacked both sides of Fred’s face.

“Hey! Hey! Where’s Victor,” James repeated.

“Uh… Victor’s… with Stryker on—on the island. They—They—They—they run it together.”

“What? Victor will be with Stryker?”

“Yeah. You didn’t know that?”

James stood up and walked to the other side of the ring, slamming his hands down on the post to gain some balance. He let out a pained groan as he closed his eyes. Stryker and Victor were working together. Stryker and Victor had worked together to kill you. You were dead because of both of them. The rage that was running through him, threatened to burst forth and destroy everything in his path. But James needed more information. His breaths were coming out in angered huffs as he tried to remain calm.

“What’s the island?” James asked.

“It’s where Stryker takes them after Victor’s caught them,” Fred answered.

“Wait a minute… takes who?”

“Mutants. Rumor is that Stryker’s doing experiments on them there.” Fred looked over at John. “I mean, you never wonder what happened to them?”

“I tried not to,” John responded.

“They killed her…” James whispered, looking at his knuckles. “They killed her so I’d let them put adamantium in me.”

“Killed who?” Asked Fred.

“Y/N.”

“What?”

“They killed her for a goddamn experiment.” James looked away, trying not to get emotional. When he spun around, anger was the main emotion. He marched back to Fred and held his fist in front of the man’s face. “Where is it?! Where is it?!”

“Logan, Stryker kept it real secret.” James released his claws, not taking Fred’s answer as the final one. “But a prisoner escaped there once.”

“Who?”

“His name was Remy LeBeau. He was a street hustler from New Orleans. The guards at the prison called him Gambit because he kept taking all their money at poker. That’s all I know.”

“What’s Stryker up to, Fred?” John asked. “What’s the endgame?”

“He’s taking their powers. Trying to combine them somehow. That’s all I know, Logan. That’s all I know.”

James clenched his jaw. There was no way that Victor and Stryker didn’t take your abilities somehow to use them for their plan. You were just a piece in their game. He hated that. You had been everything to him. You had deserved better. James couldn’t change what had happened, but he could sure continue on this path of revenge.

Chapter Text

You couldn’t tell how long you’d been tortured and experimented on. Everything had blurred together. All you knew was that they hadn’t allowed you to heal and you were barely allowed to get any rest, being woken up every time you passed out.

Stryker smiled at you when he entered the room. Oh, how you longed to burn his face off.

“Need you for one more project,” Stryker told you, standing over you. “One more mission.” He looked at you like he was inspecting you. “You know? Logan—or James, as you so fondly call him, he’s a changed man. Revenge will do that to you.”

It made you sick to think of James out there fighting again, and simply out of revenge.

Stryker looked at his people in the room. “Take Weapon 12 to a cell,” he ordered.

You were freed from the table and dragged away into a cell. Weapon 12? What were they going to do to you that required them to strip you of your name? You were tossed into a cell with the door slammed shut quickly afterward. Curling into a ball, you were finally able to let the emotions come to the surface. The sobs wracked your body as you allowed yourself to drown in the emotions of what you had been through.

Victor had found you and attacked you.

Victor injected you with something that killed you.

You woke up on the ground outside of your home with Stryker and Zero there.

James… James…

Your sobs got worse, threatening to choke you, as your thoughts focused on James.

Was he okay?

Would you ever see him again?

What did Stryker mean by James being a changed man?

James had a long, hard life. He deserved rest. Not this.

~~~

Stryker came in a few hours later, with dog tags in his hand.

“I’ve got a gift for you,” he said before throwing the tags in front of you. You shakily reached forward. “One of them is your original team tag while the other one is new. Weapon 12.”

“What—“ You paused to swallow, throat rough. “What do you want with me?”

“Your mutation, of course. It’s what I’ve always wanted. And, soon, you will have more mutations given to you. To help the cause.”

“What cause?”

“To end the war with mutants before it starts.”

“I won’t help you.”

“You won’t have a choice.” Stryker turned to leave. “I wouldn’t let yourself dwell on Logan too much, you won’t remember him soon anyway.”

The door shut, leaving you feeling utterly alone once again. With a shaky hand, you took the dog tags and placed them around your neck. You held your old tag and thought about what life would have been like if you hadn’t left with James when you did. You were sure that it would be a similar hell to what you were currently experiencing. Perhaps you would have been dead already.

You would never change what happened—you choosing to walk away with James. It brought you the happiest years of your life. You wish that you could have had more, but you were grateful for what you had.

~~~

With some help from Remy LeBeau, James got to the island. He snuck through the gates and warehouses, seeing the mutants—mostly children—for himself. It made him sick to think of all those kids being used for Stryker’s game. Just like you were. James found his way up the stairs and into the large laboratory where monitors and people were working on a body. Stryker stood near them, monitoring them.

“Logan,” Stryker greeted. “Welcome back to the war.” He nodded at a nearby guard behind James. The guard disappeared before James could do anything about it.

“Before I gut you, I want to know why,” James demanded.

“I needed your powers for the Pool.”

“For the what?”

“The mutant killer. Deadpool. Years of searching and refining, finding the right powers that can coexist in one body without ripping it apart.” Stryker turned to finally face James. “My son was the first piece of the puzzle. Logan, you were the last. You made weapon 11 possible. I asked you to help, but you said you wanted the quiet life. Well, I’ve learned that nothing motivated the men in your family like revenge.”

James inhaled sharply when the familiar scent first hit at his nose. Something—or someone— was being dragged closer from behind him. His heart began hammering against his chest.

It couldn’t be.

You were dead.

He had buried you himself.

Slowly turning around, James’ stance faltered at the sight. You were being held up by two guards, your knees on the floor. You were covered in dirt and dried blood, with your head barely holding itself up. Your clothes were ripped in various places and you looked like you’d gone through hell. Which James was sure that you had.

“James…” you rasped. That brought James to his knees, eyes locked on you.

“Did you really think I’d let Y/N die?” Stryker taunted. “Her abilities are too valuable for death. After Y/N put up a little fight, Victor injected her with a formula of our own making. She literally died. I wasn’t surprised when we found her buried at your home. We injected her with the antidote and brought her here.”

“Let her go,” James growled, his claws poking out of the surface of his skin.

Stryker gave the guards a nod and they threw you towards James. He quickly caught you before sinking to his knees again.

“James…” you repeated.

“I’m here, baby,” he whispered, his face up against yours as he tried to force himself to believe that you were real. “I’m right here… I’m going to get you out of here. They aren’t going to hurt you again.” He scanned your body, noting every new scar that they had placed on you. “What did you do to her?”

“Told you if you came down this road, you wouldn’t like what you found,” Stryker said. “You were weapon X, this is weapon XI, and Y/N is weapon XII.”

“Not if I can help it.”

James stood up with you in his arms. He glared at Stryker and began walking out with you. Stryker stopped his guards from following the two of you before turning his focus back to weapon 11.

James’ whole focus was on you. You cried against him as he carried you out of the warehouse. He was trying his best to soothe you, but his own emotions were all over the place. That allowed him to miss Victor running up and grabbing him by the neck from behind, pulling him back. The sudden jerking caused James to let go of you. You cried out as you fell hard to the ground.

James roared as he turned around, claws out, and began fighting Victor. It didn’t take long for James to pin down Victor, pointing his claws at his brother’s throat.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Victor teased. “All that rage… Do it.”

“James!” You shouted, standing up on your shaky legs.

James turned to you, face softening. He hit Victor hard in the head, causing him to pass out, before rushing back to you.

“We need to get out of here,” James said, moving to hoist you up into his arms again.

“We can’t leave yet,” you said, stopping his movements.

“What?”

“The kids. We need can’t leave the kids.”

James nodded, knowing that determined look in your eyes too well to argue. He grabbed your hand and the two of you hurried to where the kids were being kept. You melted through the gates, James close behind you. He glanced at the cages the kids were in before his claws came out. He held his hands out as he ran between the cages, slashing the locks open. You helped the kids out of the cages and towards James.

“We’ve got to go,” he said, grabbing your hand once again and leading you towards the large doors.

The doors opened before any of you got there, revealing Wade. He had been experimented on, his face clearly showing that by the way his mouth was sewn shut. You and James came to a sudden stop, the kids stopping behind you. James let go of your hand and stepped forward, revealing his claws once again. You gasped as two long swords slipped out of Wade’s knuckles.

“Y/N, get these kids out of here,” he ordered.

“I can help you,” you told him.

“No.”

“James—“

“Go! Find another way out. I’ll be right behind you.”

You quickly kissed his cheek before ushering the kids in a safer direction. You hated the thought of leaving James, but you were in no shape to fully fight and these kids needed a way out. You didn’t get far before Stryker had soldiers raining bullets down on you. The kids hid on either side of the gate while you stepped up. You formed a protective wall of fire around the kids before aiming flames at the shooters. The soldiers cried out, dying quickly because of your flames. You fell to your knees as your flames disappeared, having used too much of your energy.

“Keep going!” You told the kids. “Go! Run!”

The kids rushed away, trying to find a way out. You tried to catch your breath and gather more strength. Your head snapped in the direction of one of the large concrete towers as it began to collapse.

“James!” You shouted, getting up and running towards it. “James!” The dust in the air was thick, causing you to cough more and more. “Ja—James!”

“Y/N!” James shouted, running towards you. He quickly enveloped you in a hug, pressing his lips against yours. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“I love you,” tears were slipping down your cheeks.

“I can’t believe you’re alive.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“None of it was your fault.” James kissed you again.

“You have metal claws,” you suddenly said, finally comprehending the things you’d seen.

“I do… is that okay?”

“Well, it’s not like we can change that now, can we?” You gave him a small smile.

“No. I guess not.” He moved to hold your hand.

“You are going to have to explain why though.”

“Can do, sweetheart.” He pulled your hand up to kiss the back of it. “Let’s get out of here. We can talk some more in a safer location.”

James held tightly to your hand as he began guiding the two of you through the debris and towards a small plane nearby. You were finally feeling like you were going to be free when two quick gunshots were heard. You gasped and fell forward, onto the dirt, at the impact of the adamantium bullet to your back. Before James could do anything, he fell to his knees as the other hit his back.

Looking at you, James saw the blood rushing out from your wound. He knew you would heal was soon as the bullet came out, but there was no time to take the bullet out before Stryker hit James with another bullet. James roared as he turned around, claws out, and raced towards Stryker.

“James, no!” You shouted after him.

Stryker continued to shoot at James, hitting him. James ran up a ramp of debris, launching himself at Stryker. Stryker shot James in the head, causing James to fall to the ground with a loud thud.

“JAMES!” You screamed, rushing towards him as Stryker shot another bullet into his head.

Using your fire, you launched Stryker away from the two of you before you fell to your knees beside James. He wasn’t breathing and the two bullets in his head weren’t healing.

“James,” you cried, trying to shake him awake with the arm that wasn’t effected by the bullet. “James, please.” You fell into his chest, sobbing. “Please don’t leave me… Please don’t do this…”

“Y/N,” you heard a strange voice echo in your head. Your head snapped up, frantically looking around. “Hurry.”

“I can’t leave him,” you responded, not knowing who to or if they would even hear you.

“It’s not safe… hurry.”

You threw yourself over James’ body. “I’m not leaving him!”

“I’m so sorry about this.”

Suddenly, you didn’t have any control over your body. “No,” you sobbed as you stood. “No!” You tried to fight it but something was preventing you from doing so. “No! Stop it!”

Tears rolled down your face as you were forced to turn and head towards a black jet waiting in the nearby clearing. There was a bald man in a wheelchair, seated at the end of the ramp. You could see the children were in the jet already. Eventually, your movements stopped you in front of the man in the wheelchair.

“I’m Charles Xavier,” the man greeted. “I’m sorry for controlling you, but I’m here to bring you to safety.” He wheeled himself closer and gently took your hand, giving it a light squeeze. “You’re safe now.”

Chapter Text

You didn’t expect to be brought to a mansion—a school when you got in the jet. You had stayed silent and stared out one of the windows the entirety of the flight. Charles explained where you were headed: Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters. He ran the school for mutants to get educated and learn to handle their mutations. You would have loved the idea more if you weren’t dying inside. The kids were all escorted to a lab to get checked out while you stayed seated on the jet. Charles stayed with you.

“I can help you,” he said.

“Stay out of my head,” you grumbled.

“I am truly sorry for what I had to do before.” He wheeled closer. “You’re safe now.”

“I don’t care!” You finally looked at the man, not caring if he saw you crying. “Nothing matters anymore… Nothing…”

“You’ve been through a lot. You need rest and to get that bullet out of your shoulder.”

You shook your head. “I need James… I don’t care about anything else… I just need him.” You stood up. “I have to go back.”

“It’s too late. The military has already arrived.”

“I can’t— I can’t—“ You broke into sobs as you collapsed on your knees.

You never even noticed that a young girl had entered the jet. She walked over to you and knelt in front of you. Clearly feeling brave, the girl reached out and took your hand.

“Jean,” Charles called, “what are you doing?”

“Her thoughts are loud,” the girl, Jean, admitted.

You tried to weakly tug your hand away, but the girl held strong. You looked at her, confused, before you began to feel sleepy. Before you knew it, you were passed out on the floor of the jet.

“Jean, you shouldn’t have done that,” Charles admonished.

“I had to,” Jean argued. “Her pain was everywhere. She needs rest.”

Charles sighed. “And you did well. Go get Hank so that we can get our new friend here to a bed.”

~~~

Glancing around the room, you put together that you had been moved to the lab or med area of some sort. There was a large, blue… beast? The beast was facing away from you, looking at some screen. You cleared your throat as you sat up. The beast turned around.

“Ah, you’re awake,” he said, coming towards you. “You’ve been asleep for a few days. We were worried there for a second.”

“Where am I?” You asked, still nervous about your surroundings.

“At Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters.”

“This doesn’t look like a school.”

“This is our underground facility, used for training mostly.”

You nodded. “Who are you?”

“I’m Hank McCoy.”

“Y/N L/N.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

You sat up and swung your legs over the edge of the table. “Am I good to leave?”

“This room or the school?”

“Both.”

Hank sighed, almost like he knew you were going to say that. “You should talk to Charles before you leave. I’ll take you to him.”

You slipped off the metal table and followed Hank out into the hallway. It was silver metal, like the room you were just in, and long with various large circular doors with ‘X’s on them. Hank led you to an elevator, letting you enter first before he pressed the button to go up.

When the elevator reopened, you were a bit taken back. It was like you were transported to a completely different place. The place was grand and spacious, featuring intricate woodwork and paintings on the walls. It was almost like a museum. There were children of various ages rushing about—students of the school. You kept looking around as Hank led you to a quaint office down the hall from the elevator. Charles Xavier was already facing the door, waiting for you.

“Thank you, Hank,” Charles said. “You may leave us.”

Hank gave the other man a nod before leaving, shutting the door behind him. Charles gave you a light smile as he motioned over to a leather chair.

“Please, have a seat.”

“I’m good,” you said, your words baring no emotion.

“Very well. How are you feeling?”

“Fine.”

Charles sighed. “I am not the enemy, Y/N. I am sorry for taking away your free will, but it was for your safety.”

“My safety doesn’t matter anymore… James is dead.”

“I am sorry for your loss.”

“When can I leave?”

“Whenever you’d like. But I do hope you’d stay a while, give this place a chance. We could use another teacher.”

Your heart suddenly sunk when it finally hit you that your students didn’t know what had happened. They were probably devastated. You finally took a seat before your knees could give out.

“I believe that we could use you here, Y/N,” Charles continued. “You’d be a great teacher. A teacher to mutants like you. You could be the good influence that you didn’t have.”

You shook your head, tearing up. “I can’t… I don’t know how… not without James.”

“It will be hard. But here, you could gain a family. Friends who are like you. A job and even, a mission.”

“I… I can’t stay.”

“It’s your choice. But please do stay for a few days, just to get some rest and figure out what you would like to do. I can show you to a room that you can use as long as you need.” He reached over and placed his hand on top of yours. “This place will always welcome you, no matter what you choose.”

~~~

You were given your own room near the other teachers. You told Charles that you would stay for a few days to get a plan together and then leave. But now it had been over a week. You couldn’t get yourself to leave, but you also weren’t interacting with anyone. You kept to yourself whether that was in your room or roaming through the gardens. You could feel the eyes of everyone at the school on you, wondering who you were and what you were doing there, but you didn’t care. The gardens were big enough that you often found new areas to hide in every day. You would find a spot and cry, wishing that you could somehow make things right again. That James could be by your side.

It had been a while since you had any nightmares, now they were every time you closed your eyes. You had set your room on fire a few times, with Charles and Hank telling you that it was alright, but it didn’t matter. You avoided sleep now. You couldn’t risk burning the place down though you couldn’t find it in yourself to leave. There was something about this place that wouldn’t let you go. Something telling you that you were meant to stay.

You were in the gardens one day when it got really bad. You were absentmindedly walking around when your right hand gripped at your left. You stumbled to a stop as you looked down at your hand. Your ring. You didn’t have your ring. A sob tore through you before you could do anything about it and you were quickly brought to your knees. Your chest was tightening, causing you to struggle for breath.

You didn’t register the quick footsteps behind you. Or the three students that knelt in front of you.

“We have to help her,” one of them said. He had sunglasses over his eyes, trying to manage the lasers that could shoot from them. “Ororo?”

“Don’t look at me,” Ororo responded.

“I can help her,” the red-headed, Jean, offered. “I’ve done it before.”

Jean’s hand reached out and gripped your shoulder. Within a few moments, you were completely passed out on the ground.

“Grab her, Scott,” Jean told the boy.

Scott picked you up and carried you inside. Charles was already there waiting, sensing what had happened. He instructed the kids to take you to your room and then he’d keep an eye out on you. So that’s were you woke, in your new bed. Charles was reading a book next to the bed, using the lamp on the bedside table to give off some light.

“How did I get here?” You asked.

Charles set the book down on his lap and gave you a tight smile. “Scott Summers, one of the kids that you rescued. He and two others found you. I had them bring you here.”

You nodded as you sat up, leaning against the headboard. “I’m so lost.”

“I know.”

“I think… I think I’m going to stay. At least for a little while. Until I find myself again.”

“We would be honored to have you.”

“And I can teach?”

“Of course.”

~~~

Charles had you set up in a classroom the next day and a few days later, you were teaching the English Literature class. Jean, Scott, and Ororo were three of your students, each in different classes. Slowly, you began to connect more with each of them. You would help them with various homework assignments after classes and soon began watching their training sessions, giving them tips on how to control their powers.

“Scott, it starts with confidence,” you told him from the side of the Danger Room, located in the basement of the mansion. “If you don’t believe you can control it, them you won’t be able to.”

Charles watched the training session from the sidelines, interested in how quickly you ended up helping these kids. You watched as Scott shot his lasers everywhere, quickly losing control. You ducked before you got hit. Scott grunted in annoyance as he slipped his new visors on that Hank had made him.

“I’m done for the day,” Scott grumbled, stomping out of the room.

You sighed as you pushed yourself up to standing.

“You’ve seemed to grow fond of Scott, Jean, and Ororo,” Charles stated as he rolled toward you.

“They need some help,” you said. “I can provide that.”

“And you’re doing it very well.” He looked around the Danger Room. “When was the last time you let your powers unleashed?” You clenched your jaw, thinking back to the day you lost James. “You should take some time to work on your own abilities.”

“I don’t have any reason to.”

“And if I gave you a reason?” You eyed Charles curiously. “This underground facility is also known as the headquarters for the X-Men.”

“X-Men?”

“A team of mutant heroes that help were needed. As of right now, we don’t have a team. You could train some students, put a team together.”

“You trust me to do this?”

“Y/N, I have seen your past. This is your chance to put together a team who could actually make a difference.”

You gave it a brief thought, knowing that Charles had a point. “Okay. I’m in.”

~~~

You began training the students interested in joining the team and those with abilities that could help the team. That meant that you had long days, but you didn’t mind. The longer the days, the less time you slept, which also meant less nightmares. You began to use your abilities more and more, working to strengthen them using the Danger Room in ways that you hadn’t before. It was freeing, your alone time in the Danger Room.

A few years past and the students were older, officially ready to be part of a team. To them, that meant that they needed superhero nicknames.

“What about Cyclops?” Jean suggested for Scott.

“Cyclops isn’t terrible,” Ororo agreed.

“I honestly don’t care,” Scott said.

“Cyclops it is then,” Jean said with a smile. “Ororo is obviously Storm.”

“I love it!” Ororo exclaimed with a clap. “And you’re Phoenix, Jean.”

“Phoenix… I like it.” The three turned to you, who had remained silent, working on new suit designs. “And for Y/N… I think… Ember.”

“Ember?” You repeated.

“I think it works great!” Ororo said.

You sighed. “Whatever you kids say.”

“Ember it is then!”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “You guys need a life.”

“We have one. We’re X-Men!”

“Or X-Women,” suggested Jean.

“That doesn’t roll off the tongue nicely.”

“If you three could stop talking about names and start helping me with these sketches, that would be nice.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Scott replied with a mock salute.

With a mere thought of yours, flames appeared on the jeans Scott was wearing. He screamed, running around, while the other three of you laughed. You put out the flames before any real damage could be done, revealing that the flames had destroyed Scott’s jeans and underwear, leaving his butt hanging out. You, Jean, and Ororo only laughed harder as Scott tried to cover his butt with his hands and ran off.

~~~

You woke up feeling off and looking at the date only made it worse. It was the tenth anniversary of James’ death. Thankfully, you didn’t need to teach today. So you were slow to get up and ready before heading out to the gardens, to try and spend the day alone. Your hand stayed clasped around your dog tags as you wandered the gardens aimlessly. You could feel eyes watching you from the mansion and knew that Charles, Hank, Ororo, Jean, and Scott were worried.

It was around dinner time when Charles decided to go to you. You were standing near the pond, staring out like you weren’t even there. Charles sat next to you, staring out for a moment before clearing his throat.

“I know today is hard for you,” he said. “But there are some bright sides to it… Ten years ago, you were brought here. Scott was brought here. You’ve become a teacher and a leader to many mutants.”

“I miss him,” you rasped, voice cracking. “I miss him every day, but…”

“Today is worse. I have days like that too. Days were I miss those that I used to know.”

“Like Erik and Raven?”

“Mhm,” he nodded.

“I know you mean well, Charles, but Erik and Raven aren’t dead. You’re just on different sides of the fight. James… James is dead and part of me died with him.”

“Yes, but a new part of you was born.” When you didn’t respond, Charles sighed. “At least eat something. We can’t have you leaving us too soon.”

Charles rolled away, leaving you alone once again.

“I love you, James,” you closed your eyes and whispered, praying that somehow he could hear you. “I will always love you.”

Chapter Text

As the years went on, students came and went. The three that you now considered your family each went off to college when it was time. They all ended up back at the mansion eventually, to teach and be official X-Men members. You watched as Scott and Jean fell in love and began a relationship. You watched as Ororo became an amazing teacher.

Charles watched you carefully throughout the years. He had seen glimpses of what you had gone through, but you never fully opened up to anyone. He was glad that you stayed though, making a positive impact on the students, especially the three that ended up staying on as teachers. Charles watched as you held your dog tags during the hard moments and let your smile free during the good times. He could see that you were healing from your past. It was slow, but it was there.

Winter had decided upon New York, which meant that those in the mansion annoying decided to need your abilities more. It was easier for you to light on the fires in the mansion than for everyone to try and do it themselves. It became another job of yours. Some days you didn’t mind and other days you found it annoying. Today was one of those days you found it annoying. Mostly because Jean was following you around.

“Come on, Y/N,” she pled. “Just one night. One! Scott, Ororo, and I will even come with you.”

“I am not going to singles night at the local bar,” you told her, lighting another fireplace as you walked by. “Besides, you and Scott going is ridiculous.”

“In all the time I’ve known you, which is twenty two years by the way, you’ve never once gone on a date.”

“Don’t want to.”

“You’re almost 71, Y/N, and you barely look at day over thirty! You need to go out and live a little!”

“I have lived, Jean. I’ve also have loved and I’m good to not do it again.”

“Oh, yes, your mysterious long-lost love. You know that I could slip into your mind and find out all about him.”

“No need. He’s dead.”

“Then it’s time to move on!”

“Jean—“

“Just think about it, please? For me?”

“No.”

“Fine. I guess I’ll figure out another way to get you out of this dusty old mansion.”

“I leave the mansion all the time.”

“Not for fun.”

“Missions are fun.”

“Really? Cause I think I remember you complaining about the last one.”

You remained silent, heading to the main common living room to light the large fireplace. Once it was lit, you stared at the flames, making them dance.

Jean sighed. “I’m sorry, okay? I just want you to be happy. I’m worried about you.”

“I am happy,” you replied, forcing out a small smile.

She gave you an unconvinced look. “Are you? You’ve basically been doing the same thing for twenty-two years. Don’t you want to… I don’t know, change it up?”

“I’m content, Jean.”

“Do you really not want more to your life? Maybe there another chance at love out there, just waiting for you… I just want you to not be alone.”

“I’m not alone.”

“For now.”

“Thanks for this rousing pep talk, Jean. Very helpful.” You turned and headed out.

“Y/N! I’m sorry!”

You were grateful that Jean didn’t follow you. You knew she meant well, but you didn’t want to find another love. You had a great love with James and believed that nothing could compare.

~~~

A few hours later, Charles called you, Scott, Jean and Ororo into his office.

“There’s two mutants that need our help,” Charles stated. “I need two of you to go and retrieve them.”

“I’ll go,” Scott said.

“Me, too,” you offered.

“Actually, Y/N, I need you here,” Charles said.

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “What for?”

“To prepare the lab.”

“The lab?” You weren’t buying it. “What’s going on?”

“I simply need you here.”

“You’re lying.”

“Y/N—“

“What are you keeping from me, Charles?”

“Please just trust me on this. For now.”

“Fine.” You turned and left.

Charles sighed. “This is to protect her,” he explained to the others. “Someone is coming that will ruin the peace she has found here.”

“What do you mean, Professor?” Ororo asked.

“Someone from her past. Someone she believes is dead. I even believed him to be dead until today.”

“I’ll keep an eye out on Y/N,” Jean said.

Charles nodded. “Ororo?”

“I’ll go with Scott,” she responded.

“Thank you. We must work together to be there for Y/N as her life is about to get turned upside down.”

~~~

You felt like you were being sidelined and you hated it. You could handle whatever was coming that Charles felt like you couldn’t. After you had prepared the lab, you waited in the hangar bay for Scott and Ororo to returned. It wasn’t long before Jean joined you.

“I know that you’re babysitting me,” you grumbled, keeping your eyes on the large doors above. “Why?”

“Someone is coming,” Jean stated, like it was that simple.

Your head snapped towards Jean. “Who?”

“I don’t know. Charles just said that someone was coming. And that he’s from your past.”

Your heart began hammering in your chest. Who could possibly be coming? You jumped as the large hangar doors began opening above you. The jet descended and the ramp opened up. You watched as Ororo led a young woman off of the jet. Scott wasn’t too far behind, pushing a body laid out on the stretcher. As soon as you caught a glimpse of the body, it felt like your lungs stopped working.

He looked mostly the same as twenty-two years ago, except his hair was styled a bit differently and his facial hair was a bit more scruffy looking. You stumbled closer to try and get a better look. Scott stopped the stretcher as he watched you with growing concern.

“James?” You breathed out.

Before you could get any closer—before you could touch him, your body gave out and you collapsed onto the floor.

“Y/N!” Your friends exclaimed.

Jean rushed towards you, checking you over. “She’s unconscious,” she stated.

“She knows him?” Scott wondered.

Charles rolled into the room. “This is who I was talking about,” he said. “Scott, take Y/N to her room. Jean can handle Logan.”

Scott came over and lifted you, carefully carrying you out of the hangar.

“Do you know who he is to her, Professor?” Jean asked, studying the stranger.

“I do,” he responded. “But it’s not my place and it is not your place to pry in either of their thoughts. All you will find is pain.”

“Pain? Should we be concerned? Should we even be letting this man into the mansion?”

“Logan belongs here, just as the rest of us do. Y/N and Logan will have to deal with their past, in their own ways and time.”

~~~

You woke up in your room, alone. For a brief moment, you forgot what put you there. Then it hit you like a freight train.

James was alive.

Twenty-two years of believing that he was dead was all a lie.

Guilt wracked you. You should have fought harder to leave the school. You should have searched for him.

Had James been searching for you this entire time?

What had he been through?

Sitting up, you got out of bed and headed down the hall. You needed to talk to Charles. He had known something about James this morning and you needed the truth. As you headed down downstairs, you were too caught up in your own mind to notice anything. Suddenly, you rammed into someone, their hands going to your arms to steady you.

“Watch where you’re going, sweetheart.”

You gasped, eyes snapping up to James’ face. “James,” you breathed out.

His brows furrowed in confusion. “James? I think you got me confused with someone else.” His hands dropped from your arms and he began to frantically looked around. Almost like he was hearing something that you weren’t. “I’ve got to go.” He was gone before you could stop him.

You swear your heart could be heard shattering to the floor from miles away. Tears overwhelmed your eyes as your legs threatened to collapse beneath you. Before you could fall, Ororo’s arm was around your waist, keeping you up.

“I’ve got you,” she whispered.

“Please tell me this is a dream,” you begged. “This is a nightmare, right?”

Ororo shook her head, looking at you with concern. “You’re very much awake.”

You couldn’t prevent the sobs from ripping through you. Ororo was quick to pull you completely into her and hold you close. She rubbed a hand up and down your back, trying to calm you.

“What’s going on?” Scott’s voice sounded from behind you.

You pulled away from Ororo, quickly wiping at your face and taking deep breaths.

“I’m fine,” you said, but it was clearly not believable.

“Y/N—“

“Drop it, Scott.”

Scott clenched his jaw, frustrated with you. “The Professor wants us in his office.”

You nodded silently. Jean walked up and could sense the unease. She shot you a smile before she lead you to the Professor’s office with Ororo and Scott leading the way. You could hear James on the other side of the door before Ororo opened it.

“Ah, Logan, I’d like you to meet Ororo Monroe, also called Storm,” Charles introduced as Ororo walked in with Scott right behind her. “This is Scott Summers, also called Cyclops. They saved your life.” Jean led you in with her. “I believe you’ve already met Dr. Jean Grey.” As if this situation couldn’t get any worse, you immediately noticed the way James was checking out Jean. “And this is Y/N L/N, also called Ember.”

Jean lead you past James—Logan— guiding you to a chair. Your eyes stayed on Logan. He was wearing sweatpants and a zip-up sweatshirt, revealing part of his chest and the dog tags that rested there. Your heart stopped for a moment when you noticed that your engagement ring was hanging next to the dog tags.

“You’re in my school for the gifted,” Charles continued. “For mutants. You’ll be safe here from Magneto.”

“What’s a magneto?” Logan asked. His eyes darted towards you, an uneasiness settles in his stomach. There was something about you. Something he couldn’t quite place.

“A very powerful mutant, who believes a war is brewing between mutants and the rest of humanity. I’ve been following his activities for some time. The man who attacked you is an associate of his called, Sabretooth.”

“Sabretooth?” Logan scoffed. “Storm…” He pointed at her, clicking his tongue. “What do they call you? Wheels?” He laughed. “This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” He turned towards the doorway, only for Scott to be in his way. “And Cyclops, right?” He grabbed Scott’s jacket. “You wanna get outta my way?”

“Logan, it’s been almost twenty-two years, hasn’t it?” James paused. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed you tense. “Living from day to day, moving from place to place,” James dropped his grip on Scott, “with no memory of who or what you are.”

Logan turned, “shut up.”

“Give me a chance. I may be able to help you find some answers.”

Logan could hear your heartbeat pick up, like you knew something. He turned, narrowing his eyes at you. You immediately looked like you wanted to be anywhere else. “What do you know?”

“I— I—,” you stammered, trying to gain control of your spiraling thoughts. You stood up. “I’ve got to go.” Logan grabbed your wrist as you pushed past him. You were quick to heat up your skin, causing him to let go.

“Ah!” Logan exclaimed, shaking his hand as it healed from the burns.

“You’re not the only one with gifts,” Charles said with a smirk as you disappeared from Logan’s view.

~~~

Charles led Logan on a tour of the mansion, with you trying to go about your regularly scheduled day. But, for some reason, James—Logan, was always nearby. You could feel his eyes on you when you weren’t looking and you were fairly sure that he could feel your eyes just the same. You were in the stables, trying to get away from Logan, when Charles led him in there.

“I’ll make a deal with you,” Charles told Logan. “Give me 48 hours to find out what Magneto wants with you, and I give you my word that I will use all my power to help you piece together what you’ve lost, and what you’re looking for.”

Logan glanced up at you, briefly making eye contact before you scurried away. “That… girl,” Logan said, pointing to where you were standing. “Who is she?”

Charles gave Logan a kind smile. “Y/N is very much a woman, Logan. Don’t let looks deceive you.”

“Yes, but… there’s something about her. Something… familiar…” He stopped himself, shaking his head. “I think I must’ve hit my head too hard.”

“You should rest more. Your abilities may heal you, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need rest.”

“You’ve got 48 hours. Then I want the help you promised.”

Chapter Text

Jean called you down to the lab. When you got there, x-ray’s of Logan’s were lining the walls and screens. Charles, Scoot, and Ororo were already sitting in front of the screens. You pulled up a chair behind them, studying the x-ray’s. You had seen Jam—Logan’s metal claws briefly and you knew that Stryker had a big part of that but Logan was never able to explain himself to you.

“The metal is an alloy called adamantium,” Jean explained. “Supposedly indestructible. It’s been surgically grafted to his entire skeleton.”

“How could he have survived a procedure like that?” Ororo wondered.

“His mutation. He has uncharted regenerative capability which enables him to heal rapidly. This also makes his age impossible to determine. He could very well be older than you, Professor. And you, Y/N.”

“He’s turning 169 this year,” you mumbled.

Everyone’s heads snapped in your direction.

“And you know that, how?” Scott asked.

You shook your head. “He’s— He was—I can’t… I’m not ready.”

“Who did this to him?”

“He doesn’t know,” answered Jean, trying to get the pressure off of you. “Nor does he remember anything about his life before it happened.”

“Anything?” You squeaked, a tear slipping down your cheek. “He doesn’t remember anything?”

“Y/N,” Charles called, trying to ground your emotions. “Perhaps it’s time to explain.”

“No. I’m not ready.”

He maneuvered his chair over to you. “I know. But we all deserve to know the truth about who Logan… who James is. Including him.”

You took a shaky deep breath. “His name is James Logan Howlett. He was born in 1832. I meant him in 1972 when he joined William Stryker’s team, which I was already a part of.” You looked up, trying not to let more tears fall. “He saved me from that team… we ran away. Started a life… we… we fell in love.” Your voice cracked and you quickly stood up. “I’m sorry… I can’t do this.”

You rushed out of the lab before anyone could stop you.

~~~

You needed food. You also felt like you needed to finally talk some more about your past with Logan. It had felt like a weight being lifted from you, making your realize you shouldn’t carrying this on your own. Exiting your room, you heard voices in the room next door.

“Where’s your room?” It was Logan.

“With Scott,” Jean replied, “down the hall.” You moved closer to the room.

“Is that your gift? Putting up with that guy?”

“Actually, I’m telekinetic. I can move things with my mind.”

“Really? What kinds of things?” You heard the closet doors slam shut.

“All kinds of things. I also have a telepathic ability.”

“What, like your professor?”

“Nowhere near that powerful. But he’s teaching me to develop it.”

“I”m sure he is.” You peeked around the corner as saw Logan move closer to Jean. “So read my mind.”

“I’d rather not.”

“Come on. You afraid you might like it?”

Logan’s flirting with Jean stung you. You glanced to your side as you heard footsteps, only to see Scott joining you.

“I doubt it,” Jean replied to Logan.

You watched as Jean raised her hands on either side of Logan’s head. She closed her eyes and entered his mind. Almost as soon as she started, she gasped and opened her eyes. Logan grabbed her hands to steady them.

“What do you see?” He asked.

Jean noticed you and Scott in the doorway. “Y/N!” She greeted. “Scott!” Jean pulled her hands away from Logan. “Goodnight, Logan.”

Logan turned, making eye contact with you. His breath caught as a brief image of you smiling flashed before his eyes. Jean walked past Scott and over to you, grabbing your hand and pulling you down the hall.

“Jean?” You said, confused.

“I saw you,” Jean stated, stopping in front of her and Scott’s room.

“What?”

“I saw you in his mind. You’re in there. His memories of you are in there.”

“Don’t…” you shook your head. “Don’t give me hope, Jean. I don’t want it.” You turned away and looked at the door that Scott had just closed.

“The ring is yours, isn't it?” Your head fell, hands coming up to cover your face. “The engagement ring with his dog tags.”

“Yes.”

“Oh, Y/N.” Jean quickly went around and hugged you. You melted into her with tears.

“I thought he was dead, Jean… for twenty-two years, I believed he was dead…” Scott came up from behind, resting a caring hand on your back. “He doesn’t remember me,” you sobbed. “I love him and he doesn’t even know who I am.”

Jean and Scott moved you into their bedroom as your cries worsened. Neither of them noticed Logan peering out of his room. He could hear someone crying. When he noticed it was you, he only grew more curious. But before Logan could hear what you were crying about, you were led into another bedroom. There hadn't been a time in his twenty-two years of memory, where Logan’s heart ached like it did now. None of this was making any sense to him. Who were you? And what were you keeping from him?

~~~

Eventually, you ended up in your own bed. Crying should have worn you out, but you couldn’t sleep. Not with Logan in the next room over, having a nightmare. You bit your lip as you struggled to not rush over there. You didn’t want to overwhelm him. But his grunting, moaning, and cries were tearing you apart. Suddenly, you heard the familiar release of his claws and his screams.

“Help me!” Logan shouted. “Somebody, help!”

You were out of bed and into the next room before you knew it. You stood in the doorway to see Marie—or Rogue—the girl who came in with Logan, touching his face. Logan was greying, struggling to breathe. From what you had heard, Rogue was not supposed to touch others, as it could be dangerous. Rogue pulled away before you could stop her. Logan fell to the ground, trembling. You were quick to rush over to Logan’s side, placing his head in your lap to steady him.

“It’s okay,” you whispered. “I’m right here.”

Scott, Jean, and Ororo rushed into the room. Jean and Scott quickly joined you on the floor with Logan.

“It was an accident,” Rogue said to Ororo as students gathered in the doorway.

Scott, Jean, and Ororo rushed in and joined you on the floor with Logan.

“Jean, will he be okay?” You asked, trying to bury the emotions within you but clearly failing.

“His mutation is kicking in,” Jean explained as she looked him over. “He just needs rest. Scott, help me get him on the bed.”

You watched as Scott and Jean worked together to lift Logan—and his metal skeleton—onto the bed. Jean carefully got him situated before you stood up.

“We should all get some rest,” Jean stated.

You shook your head. “I’m not leaving,” you said, pulling up at chair to the side of Logan’s bed. “Not until I know he’s alright.”

“Y/N—“ Scott tried, only to be stopped by Jean.

Scott sighed and the two of the left to go get the students who woke up back to bed. You sat on the chair, staring at Logan. He was your James in looks, but everything else was different. Including his personality. The years and memory loss had turned him into a rough man with walls up to protect himself. You suspected that he was also claiming it was to protect everyone around him as well.

~~~

“Logan?” Charles called, feeling the man lying on the bed begin to wake.

“What happened?” Logan wondered, looking at where Charles was beside him. “Is she all right?”

“She’s be all right.”

“What did she do to me?”

“When Rogue touches someone, she takes their energy, their life force. In the case of mutants, she absorbs their gifts for a while. In your case, your ability to heal.”

“I feel like she almost killed me.”

“If she’d held out any longer, she could have.”

Logan nodded, trying to place his thoughts together. He nightmare that he was in the midst of before Rogue came in was a familiar one. The flashes of the experiment they did on him. But there were some different scenes this time. Flashes of you. You crying. You laughing. You just talking to him. Turning his head, Logan finally realized that you were curled up in a chair, sound asleep. He looked at you with furrowed brows. Something inside of him hated seeing you asleep on the chair. You should be in a bed.

“She refused to leave your side,” Charles told him.

“Who is she?” Logan repeated the question from hours before. “I think… I think I knew her… Jean jumped into my brain and I think she did something. I keep seeing Y/N’s face.”

Charles sighed. “I suggest you talk to Y/N in the morning. She is the only one able to explain things.”

“Can you at least tell me how long Y/N’s been here?”

“Twenty-two years.”

Logan’s eyes snapped back to look at you. There was something you were hiding. Between the time frame being the same and your face appearing in his mind, Logan knew that you were some part of his past. You had answers to questions that Logan had been searching for.

“Thanks, Professor,” Logan said, sitting up. “I’ll watch her.”

Charles nodded, heading for the door. He glanced back and saw Logan out of bed, heading for you. Charles watched as Logan picked you up and gently set you on the bed, tucking you in before taking his place in your chair. The Professor couldn’t help but smile as he left the room. There was some hope for you two after all.

Chapter Text

Twenty-two years of memories. Only a mere glimpse of any life before that. Logan had tried everything to get his memories back or to find out what had happened to him, but nothing. Now, as he sat in a chair in a mansion that was actually a school, he felt a small tinge of hope. That hope was you, currently sleeping in his borrowed bed.

Logan’s hands went up to his dog tags, carefully maneuvering them so that he could grab onto the ring. He remembered when he first realized there was a ring hanging from his neck. The various emotions and questions that swirled in his mind.

Who’s ring was this?

Did he give it to anyone?

Was the person it belonged to, dead?

Logan kept the ring with him all these years as a reminder that he had a life before his memories disappeared. That he might have had love, a home, and family. And that maybe one day he would find that again.

Maybe you knew the story behind the ring. As he moved the ring through his fingers, he studied you carefully. You seemed to be a quiet, nervous type. But that could just be the current situation. You were beautiful, Logan couldn’t doubt that. Though, you looked young, like you might have been in your teens twenty-two years ago. And it was clear that you knew more about Logan than you were letting on.

“James,” it fell from your lips like a prayer.

Logan tensed, watching you carefully. You seemed to still be asleep, just dreaming. Then he remembered his first run in with you. You had called him James. Was that his real name? His dog tags told him Logan, Wolverine, and Weapon X were his names. It was the only reason he knew his name upon the missing memories.

He leaned in closer, trying to see if you were truly sound asleep. That’s when he caught a glimpse of a chain. Carefully, Logan pulled on the chain, trying his best not to wake you. As soon as the dog tags were in his hands, he gasped. They looked just like his, but with different names. Y/N and Weapon XII were inscribed on yours.

Were you experimented on as well? Is that how you knew him?

Logan slipped the dog tags off of you, gripping them tightly in his hands. In the morning, he would be sure to make you give him some answers.

~~~

Your were on a bed, you quickly noticed upon waking. You were sure that you had fallen asleep on one of Logan’s chairs. Opening your eyes, you realized that you were still in Logan’s room. You sat up and looked around for Logan. The bathroom door was ajar and you could hear the shower running.

There once was a time where you would join Logan in the shower. How you wished that was still the case. Not for any sexual reasons, but just to be held by Logan. That’s all you needed right now, was to be held.

The water turned off and you realized that you probably should take your leave. As you stood up, you realized that something was missing. Your hands began to frantically pat at your chest. Where were your dog tags? Quickly, you began searching the room. They had to be in here. You could have sworn you had them on you when you entered last night. You never took them off!

“Looking for these?”

You spun around at the sound of Logan’s voice. Your breath caught in your throat at the sight of him. His skin was still damp and his towel was hanging low on his hips. You had forgotten how handsome he was. His dog tags and your engagement ring laid on his chest while your dog tags hung from one of his hands.

“Thanks,” you muttered, reaching for them. He quickly lifted his hand up, not allowing you to grab them.

“Not until I get some answers.”

“James—I mean, Logan, I—.”

“See, there. That right there. Why are you calling me James?”

“Because it’s your name… James Logan Howlett.”

“How do you know that?”

You wanted to disappear. You never really wished for a different mutation until this moment. You took a step back, only for Logan to take a step towards you.

“How do you know my name?” Logan repeated, growing more frustrated. “Why do you have similar dog tags to me?”

“I—“

Tears were trying to overwhelm your eyes. You hated this. Hated how he looked at you with such frustration and no recognition. It was preventing you from speaking.

“Tell me!” He shouted.

Logan couldn’t control his metal claws releasing due to his frustrations and he hated that. He hated how the tears quickly fell from your eyes and you stumbled back, away from him.

“Shit,” he muttered, stepping back and pulling in his claws. “I didn’t— I’m sorry.”

“I’ve got to go,” you whispered, rushing out of the room.

“Y/N!” He shouted, stopping himself at the doorway as he heard your bedroom door slam shut. “Fuck.” He rested his head on his open door.

Logan had messed up, he knew that. He hated himself for it. He let his emotions take the reign, not even thinking about you in this situation. Your eyes, shining with tears and what he could only believe was fear, were seared into his memory. Looking down, Logan realized that he still had your dog tags in his hand.

“What did you do?” Scott’s anger was clear. Logan looked up at the man, standing up straighter to defend himself. “Why do you have Y/N’s dog tags?”

“None of your business, bub,” Logan growled.

Scott stepped forward, challenging Logan. “Actually, it very much is my business.” He pointed over to your room where now the two men could hear you crying. “Y/N is my family. I will do want needs to be done to protect her.” He reached over and ripped your dog tags from Logan’s grip.

“She needs to tell me what she knows.”

“Y/N doesn’t need to tell you anything. Ever.”

Scott turned on his heel and walked over to your door. Logan watched as Scott knocked and asked to be let in, only to be met with silence. Scott shot Logan a glare before leaving your dog tags hanging on the doorknob and walking away. Logan fought the urge to go over to your door. Instead, he retreated into his room and got ready for the day. When he was finished, Logan could still hear you in your room and see the dog tags hanging from the knob. Quietly, he walked by, slipping the tags into his pocket.

~~~

You had run away from Logan and immediately regretted it. You knew that he believed that he had scared you. That would never change about Logan. In all honesty, Logan hadn’t scared you. His claws hadn’t scared you. Everything was just happening so fast and you were overwhelmed. You knew that Logan felt something similar. The biggest reason you were crying is because Logan was standing in front of you—the man you loved—and he didn’t love you. He doesn’t know you. And, in reality, you really didn’t know him anymore either. It was all slowly killing you.

You ignored Scott’s pleas to be let in, only wanting to be alone. You let yourself cry until you couldn’t anymore. Then you cleaned yourself up for the day. It wasn’t too long later that you ended up in the lower levels with Charles and Scott, trying to figure out Magneto’s plan.

“What are you looking for, Eric?” Charles whispered as he stared at Logan’s scans. He turned away from the scans. “It’s strange. There are more powerful mutants out there. Why should this one be so important to him?”

“Maybe it’s his way with people,” Scott commented, glancing your way.

“You don’t like him.”

“How could you tell?”

Charles smirked. “Well, I am psychic, you know.”

The large doors slid open, revealing Logan and Ororo.

“Where is she?” Logan asked, clearly concerned.

You stood up straight, thinking he was talking about you.

“Who?” Scott asked.

“Rogue,” Charles answered. “She’s gone.”

Before you knew it, Jean had joined the group and you all were standing in front of Cerebro’s doors. Charles scanned his eye to enter before rolling in, with Logan following.

“Welcome to Cerebro,” Charles said.

“This certainly is a big, round room,” commented Logan.

Charles began using the control panel at the end of the walkway. “The brain waves of mutants are different from average human beings. This device amplifies my power, allowing me to locate mutants across great distances. That’s how I intend to find Rogue.”

“Why don’t you just use it to find Magneto?”

“I have tried, but Magneto has a helmet that blocks my abilities. Now if you’ll excuse me…” Charles placed the helmet on his head and Logan walked out of Cerebro, the doors shutting behind him.

“Have you ever…?” Logan turned to Jean.

“Used Cerebro?” Jean finished his question. “No. It takes a degree of control and… for someone like me, it’s—“

“Dangerous,” Scott finished.

You began heading back to the lab, Logan hot on your tail.

“Hey, can we talk?” Logan wondered.

“Sure,” you mumbled, stopping.

“I’m sorry about this morning.”

“It’s no big deal.” You shrugged, avoiding eye contact with him.

“Yes, it was.” He moved his head to force you to look at him. “I… I scared you.”

You shook your head. “You didn’t scare me… you could never scare me, James. It was… it’s hard to explain.”

“Try to.” He stepped closer to you. “I need you to tell me what you know.”

“I will, but now is not really the time. We need to bring Rogue back.”

“Right,” Logan nodded. “After?”

“After.”

Cerebro’s doors opened and Charles appeared. “She’s at the station,” he informed everyone.

“Where is it?” Logan asked.

“A few miles west of here.”

Logan started down the hallway.

“Logan, you can’t leave,” you told him, stopping him with a hand to his arm. “If you leave, Magneto will find you.”

“Listen,” he looked at you dead in the eye, “I’m the reason she took off.”

“We had a deal,” Charles reminded him.

“She’s all right,” Ororo said. “She’s just upset.”

“Storm, Cyclops, find her. See if you can talk to her.”

Scott and Ororo walked off. You could tell Logan hated the idea of staying in the mansion. When he walked off, you were quick to follow after him.

“You can’t go, Logan,” you told him. “It’s too dangerous.”

“She left because of me,” Logan responded. “I have to bring her back.”

You followed him up to the main floor and into the garage. “Logan, please,” you begged. You were scared of what Magneto could do to him. His skeleton was metal and that was Magneto’s power. “I can’t lose you again!”

“I don’t even know you!” Logan exclaimed, spinning around to face you. “I don’t know who you are! Hell, I don’t even know who I am!”

“James—“

“Stop calling me that!” Logan turned away from you. He sighed, the frustration in his shoulders releasing, allowing them to sag. He felt guilty for yelling at you again. There was just so much turmoil inside of him that rage often let out. “I’ll be back with Rogue… Then we can talk.”

You stood there as Logan took Scott’s motorcycle and drove off. You were still there when Scott and Ororo appeared, asking where his motorcycle was. You ignored him, still staring out the doors. Charles was the next to appear, after Ororo and Scott had drive off.

“He needs time,” Charles told you. “And you need to tell him the truth.”

“He’s not the same,” you whispered, head down.

“Neither are you.” He reached up and gave your hand a squeeze.

“I know it’s selfish for wanting it easy… for wanting him to just remember me—to love me—but I don’t care.”

“It’s not selfish. The two of you shared a great bond, and pieces of it is still there, you just have to be patient. You’ve waited twenty-two years, what’s a little longer?”

Chapter Text

All hell had broken loose at the station, leading you all to find out that Magneto was going after Rogue and not Logan. He had successfully taken Rogue despite efforts to stop him. Logan was furious upon he return to the mansion and you couldn’t blame him. You and Charles found yourself in Logan’s room while he cleaned up after the fight.

“You said he wanted me,” Logan said, turning around and slipping his leather jacket back on.

“I made a terrible mistake,” Charles admitted. “I couldn’t see what he was after until it was too late.”

Logan headed for the door.

“Where are you going?” You asked.

“I’m gonna find her,” he responded.

“How?” Charles wondered.

“The traditional way: look.” He left the room but you followed after him.

“Logan, you can’t do this alone,” you said.

“Who’ll help me? You?” Logan continued down the stairs. “So far, you’ve all done a bang-up job.”

“Then help us. Fight with us.”

He turned to face you. You were a few steps up from him while he was at the bottom of the stairs. “I don’t even know if you can fight. What is your ability? Secrets? Besides, fighting with you? Joining the team? Be an X-Man? Who the hell do you think you are? You’re a mutant. The world is full of people that hate and fear you and you’re wasting your time trying to protect ‘em? I’ve got better things to do.”

Logan’s response took you back a little, adding to the list of things that had changed about him since you had last been with him.

“Logan—“

“You know, Magneto’s right. There’s a war coming. Are you sure you’re on the right side?”

“At least I’ve chosen a side.”

Logan clenched his jaw at your response before opening the door. On the doorstep, stood a man, looking worse for wear and panting.

“I’m looking for Dr. Jean Grey,” he rasped, before stumbling forward into Logan.

“Jean!” You shouted, knowing that she would hear you somehow. “Meet us in the lab! Come on,” you ushered Logan, with the man in his arms, down to the lab.

You quickly got the man situated before Charles and Jean joined you. Charles rolled up to the man’s side, seeming to already know who he was.

“Senator Kelly,” Charles greeted. “I’m Professor Charles Xavier.”

“I was afraid if I went to the hospital,” the Senator said through pants, “they would…”

“Treat you like a mutant? We’re not what you think. Not all of us.”

“Tell it to the ones who did this to me.”

Charles furrowed his brows in concern before wheeling around to be at the Senator’s head. “Senator… I want you to try and relax. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Charles placed his hands on either side of the Senator’s head and closed his eyes. You nibbled your lip nervously as Charles flittered through the Senator’s thoughts. Your hand went to your chest to try and hold your dog tags, only to realize the weren’t there. Logan noticed your movement and felt guilty for still having your dog tags. But he didn’t make a move to give them back, hoping that having them would convince you to tell him what you knew.

“Upstairs, now,” Charles said as he pulled away from the Senator. Once in his office, Charles began to explain what he saw. “The machine emits radiation that triggers mutation in ordinary human beings.”

“But the mutation is unnatural,” Jean said. “Kelly’s body is rejecting it. His cells began to break down almost immediately.”

“What effect does the radiation have on mutants?” Scott asked.

“There appears to be none,” Charles answered. “But I fear it will harm any normal person exposed to it.”

“So what does Magneto want with Rogue?” Logan asked.

“I don’t know.”

Logan clearly wasn’t happy with that answer, throwing his leather jacket down.

“Wait a second,” Scott said. “You said this machine draws its power from Magneto, and that it weakened him.”

“Yes,” replied Charles. “In fact, it nearly killed him.”

“He’s going to transfer his power to Rogue and use her to power the machine,” Logan said, Magneto’s plan finally clicking.

“Cyclops, you and Storm ready the jet. I’m gonna find Rogue. Y/N, get Logan a uniform.”

“Whoa, wait a minute,” Scott stood up, pointing at Logan. “He’s not coming with us, is he?”

“Yes.”

“Sorry, Professor, but he’ll endanger the mission and—“

“Hey, I wasn’t the one who gave the station a new sunroof, pal,” Logan interrupted.

“No, you were the one who stabbed Rogue in the chest.”

“Why don’t you take your little mission and stick it up—“

“Senator Kelly is dead,” Ororo ran in and announced.

“I’m going to find Rogue,” Charles stated. “Settle this. Quickly.”

~~~

Logan followed you down to the lower levels, where you found him a suit.

“Thanks,” he muttered, taking it from you. You nodded, suddenly tensing as you heard something. “What is it?”

“Something’s wrong.” You rushed out of the room to see Cerebro’s doors open down the hall. Charles was laying on the ground, out of his chair. “Charles!”

You and Logan ran into Cerebro. You checked for a pulse, revealed when you felt one.

“I got him,” Logan said, lifting Charles up.

“In the lab,” you told him, though Logan was already heading there.

Jean, Scott, and Ororo came running down the hall. Jean had felt something and knew it was the Professor. Logan set Charles down and Jean quickly got to work. You couldn’t bare to see Charles lying on the table like that so you left, heading out to the garden. Logan noticed and went after you. You could feel him behind you as you came to a stop, thankful that he kept his distance. You could smell the cigar as Logan retrieved it from his pocket and quickly lit it for him as he put it to his lips. Logan’s eyes widened is brief surprise but quickly realized that you were the one who lit the cigar.

“I’m older than Charles,” you suddenly told Logan. “You wouldn’t guess because of my healing factor, it slows my aging, just like yours. Though, you have the better healing since mine still leaves scars.”

Logan took a few steps closer to you. “I’m sorry about the Professor.”

You nodded, trying to reign in the tears. “Me too…”

“I, uh, I’ve been seeing flashes of you… brief images in my mind.” You gasped as his admission. “Especially since Jean entered it. It’s like she unlocked something. Well, more like barely cracked it open. When I see you, there’s usually a red, orange, or yellow tint to it.”

“I can control fire. It’s probably why those colors tint your memories.”

Logan nodded. “Makes sense.” He stepped closer. “Who were you to me?”

“We—“ Your voice cracked, letting Logan hear the emotions you were trying so hard to push down. “We were in love.”

Logan looked down at his chest, looking at the ring. “We were engaged.”

“Mhm,” you nodded. “It was our last good day.”

“It’s your ring that’s been with my dog tags.”

“You took it when I died…”

“What?”

“I was killed to trick you. I honestly don’t fully know what they wanted to trick you into, but I assume your adamantium skeleton has something to do with it.”

“They used you?”

“Yes.”

Overbearing silence fell between the two of you. There was so much unsaid, so much unknown. It’s like the universe didn’t know what to do with it either. Logan’s mind was running a hundred miles per minute. He had just found out that the two of you had been engaged and that the people who experimented on him had killed you to get to him.

“I’m sorry,” Logan whispered. “I should have protected you.”

You spun around. “You did protect me. They were going to turn me into Weapon XII and you got me out of there.” You fell silent, thinking about that day. “I’m the one who failed you… I should have stayed with you, but I thought you were dead.” You turned back around, feeling guilty for having left him though Charles had been the one to force you away.

“I’m sure it’s not your fault… You were smart to leave. You found this place. A home.”

“It’s not the same… I’ve only felt at home with you.”

“Y/N… I’m not the same man you knew.”

“I know. I’ve seen the looks you’ve given Jean… you used to look at me that way.”

“I’m sorry.”

You sighed. “I know you are.” Silence fell between you both for another moment. “Can you… can you do something for me?”

“Anything.” Logan hated how desperate that sounded.

“Can you hold me?”

Without a verbal answer, Logan came up behind you and slowly wrapped his arms around you. You leaned back into him as he pulled you closer. Your arms found themselves onto of Logan’s. A few tears slipped down your cheeks as you let yourself pretend that this Logan truly remembered you.

Logan kept the cigar in his mouth as he held you close. It felt right, you in his arms. He tensed as a scene suddenly began playing in his head. You were crying, curled up in his lap as he comforted you on a couch. There was some smoke in the memory, like something had been on fire. He could only assume that was your doing.

“I’m sorry—“ You tried to pull away when you felt him tense. Your words pulled him from the memory.

“No,” he quickly stopped you, pulling you back into him. “Just a little longer.”

You nodded, leaning back further to be closer to Logan. You closed your eyes and let yourself be in the moment. Logan spit his cigar out and stomped on it, before allowing himself to rest his head against yours. Like it was out of habit, he pressed a light kiss to your head. And for the first time in twenty-two years, Logan felt like he had a home.

Chapter Text

When you and Logan went back inside, you found out that Jean had tried to use Cerebro after finding out that Charles had been poisoned. She ended up finding out where Magneto had taken Rogue, but it had taken a good deal of strength from her. The team gathered in the briefing room to come up with a plan. You had noticed that Logan was sticking close to you, not close enough to touch, but close enough that you knew he was there. You were all surrounding the pin table, allowing Scott to take the lead and use the table to show information.

“Magneto is here,” Scott said as the table changed to show the location. “Liberty Island. Presumably his objective is to mutate the world leaders at the U.N. Summit on Ellis Island.”

“He doesn’t know his machine kills,” Ororo said, “and judging from what the Professor saw, if Magneto gave Rogue enough power—“

"He could wipe out everyone in New York City,” Jean finished.

“All right,” Scott said, “we can insert here at the George Washington Bridge. Come around the bank, just off of Manhattan. We land on the far side of Liberty Island. Here.”

“What about harbor patrol?” Logan asked. “Radar?”

“Magneto would have already dealt with most of the harbor control,” you replied. “Besides, if they have anything that can pick up our jet, they deserve to catch us.”

“Suit up,” Scott ordered. “I want to be in the sky in ten.”

You headed out to grab your suit, with Logan following. He had left his suit on the floor when the two of you found Charles. You stripped yourself of your clothes, leaving you in shorts and a sports bra, before pulling the suit on. Logan stepped around the corner in his suit as you pulled the leather up.

“Here,” he mumbled, coming closer.

He carefully unfolded some of the leather and zipped up the back of your suit. You inhaled sharply as Logan’s fingers grazed your skin.

“Thanks,” you told him.

Logan gave you a nod before following you to the jet. He zipped up the front of his suit as he sat down and tugged at the collar before slipping gloves over his hands. You could tell that this whole situation was uncomfortable to him.

“You actually go outside in these things?” He wondered.

“What would you prefer?” Scott retorted, as he prepared the jet for take off. “Yellow spandex?”

Logan gave you an unamused look with you giving him a small smile in return. The engines revved and Scott began to fly the jet.

“Whoa!” Logan exclaimed, closing his eyes briefly.

Remembering Logan’s thoughts on flying, you reached across the small isle, holding out your hand. He looked at it before shaking his head. You hated how your heart ached at the rejection. As you began to pull your hand away, the jet jostled and Logan quickly took ahold of your hand. You gave his hand a simple squeeze in acknowledgement, trying not to make a big deal out of it for both his sake and your heart’s.

The flight was short and before you knew it, the jet was above New York City. Logan let go of your hand and released his claws, causing them to form openings in the leather gloves he had on.

“There’s the bridge,” Scott stated. “I”m takin’ her down. Storm, some cover, please.”

Storm’s eyes went white and fog filled the sky. Scott flew over to Liberty Island and hand the jet land in the water with a thud.

“Sorry,” he apologized.

“You call that a landing?” Asked Logan.

“Let’s please save the fighting boys,” you said as you got up and opened the top of the jet.

The team followed you out of the jet and onto the island. It was normal for you to take the lead on missions, so no one put up a fight.

“They’re going to be in the torch,” you said, glancing at Logan. “Come on.”

Entering the building, you realized that the security had already been handle. The only sound was from a small television about the Summit happening nearby. You walked through the metal detector, not even thinking about it. Suddenly, the alarm wailed and you spun around to see Logan cutting down the detector. He looked over at the rest of you, leaving his middle claw up. You rolled your eyes and continued carefully through the room.

Logan paused next to you, sniffing. “There’s someone here,” he said.

“Where?” Scott asked, looking around.

“I don’t know. Keep your eye open.” Then he continued walking forward.

“Logan,” you called, put his hand signaled for you to stop while he kept going. “Damn it.”

“Anything?” Scott asked.

You looked over to see that Logan had returned, but from a different direction. Taking a step back, you began warming up your hands.

“There’s someone here,” Logan responded. “I just can’t see ‘em.”

He released his claws and before he could attack Scott, another Logan had tackled him to the ground. The two began fighting. Scott stepped up to use his lasers, while flames covered your hands.

“Wait!” Both Logan’s shouted. One of the Logan’s quickly hit a cord that shut a door between you and them.

“All right, back up, back up,” Scott ordered.

Before he could do anything, another mutant made their entrance. Their tongue attached to a pipe, they came swinging in, kicking Scott down between doing the same to Jean and Ororo.

“We’ve got him!” Jean shouted at you. “Find Rogue and Logan.”

You nodded, running off. You quickly found stairs and began heading up them. Hearing footsteps behind you, you spun around, throwing a fire ball.

“Hey!” Logan shouted, ducking before he could get hit. “It’s me!”

You readied another fire ball. “Prove it.”

He reached down his suit and pulled out two sets of dog tags. “I have yours with me.”

You nodded, calming down your flames. “Alright.” Logan came up the steps to meet you. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Though he didn’t ask if you were okay, you could see Logan’s eyes studying you for any signs of injury. “Let’s go.”

You and Logan made it to the head of the Statue of Liberty with the others not too far behind. There was a hole at the top that allowed you a view of the torch.

“Everybody get out of here,” Logan suddenly said.

“What is it?” You asked, moving to stand beside him.

“I can’t move.”

Suddenly, Logan went flying to the wall. You were next, the two of you facing each other as metal bands kept you there. Ororo was secured on a wall by herself while Scott and Jean found themselves in a similar situation as you and Logan. Magneto lowered himself into room.

“Ah, my brothers,” he greeted. “Welcome.” Magneto turned to face Logan. “And you, just point those claws of yours in a safer direction.” Though Logan tried to resist, his fists were placed on your chest. If his claws released, it could kill you. Magneto smirked as Sabretooth entered the room and took Scott’s glasses. “You better close your eyes.”

“Storm, fry ‘em,” Scott ordered.

“Oh, yes. A bolt of lightning into a huge copper conductor. I thought you lived at a school.” Magneto placed his hand on the commutation device in his ear. “Mystique? Mystique!”

“I’ve seen Senator Kelly,” Jean told him.

“So, the good Senator survived his fall. And the swim to shore. He’s become even more powerful than I imagined.”

“He’s dead.”

“It’s true,” Ororo confirmed. “I saw him die. Like those people down there will die.”

“Are you sure you saw what you saw? Why do none of you understand what I’m trying to do? Those people down there control our fate and the fate of every other mutant! Well, soon our fate will be theirs.”

“Help!” Rogue shouted from above. “Please help me!”

“You’re so full of shit,” Logan spat, anger evident. “If you were really so righteous, it’d be you in that thing.”

“Help! Somebody help me!”

Magneto floated up without saying another word. Logan suddenly groaned, sweat collecting on his forehead. You could feel Logan’s claws pricking at your skin.

“It’s okay,” you told him.

“I’m trying—“ Logan was clearly struggling. “I don’t want to—“

“I know. It’s going to get hot real soon and you’re going to let it happen.”

“What? Y/N, are you—“

The metal around Logan gave way, having been heated up. Before Logan knew it, he was falling to the ground, his claws scratching you all the way down.

“Y/N!” Jean exclaimed as you cried out.

“No, no, no, no, no.” Logan was quickly on his feet, examining you. His claws had cut through the metal, allowing him to grab you and carefully move you to the ground. “Y/N, I am so sorry… why did you do that?”

“I’ll be fine,” you told him. “I’m healing.” Logan looked and could see your skin healing together into scars. You could tell that it wasn’t enough for Logan. “Logan, I’m fine.” Sabertooth growled, reminding you all of his presence. “Deal with him, I’ll free the others.”

Logan nodded, turning around and quickly started a fight with the other mutant. Their fight soon took them on top of the Statue of Liberty, allowing you to free the others by heating up the metal. Jean quickly gave Scott his glasses back while Ororo came to your side, helping you up. Sabertooth suddenly jumped back into the room and you blasted him out with your fire. You stumbled back, still weak. Logan jumped down and quickly steadied you. Your heads all snapped to look up when Rogue screamed again. Magneto had started up the machine.

“We gotta get her outta there,” Logan stated. “Cyclops, can you hit it?”

“The rings are moving too fast,” Scott replied.

“Just shoot it!”

“I’ll kill her! Storm, can you get me up there?”

“I can’t control it like that,” Storm said. “You could fly right over the torch.”

“I’ll go,” you said.

“Oh, hell no,” Logan shook his head. “I’ll go. If I don’t make it, at least you can still blast the damn thing.”

“You have a metal skeleton, Logan! Magneto can stop you. I’m going.”

“You won’t heal if Rogue touches you!”

“Yes, I will!”

Before another argument could break out, you used your flames to shoot you up. You could hear the call of your name from below, but you didn’t care. It was too risky for anyone else to stop the machine and Magneto. You landed on the torch, beside Magneto. The radiation from the machine began to travel outward. Magneto raised his had to try to stop you, but soon found that there wasn’t enough metal on you. You threw some flames his way, causing him to stumble backwards and fall down.

“Ah!” Rogue cried out, part of her hair turning white.

“I’ve got you, Rogue,” you told her.

You set your hands on the machine and began focusing your energy into it. The machine melted, causing the radiation to suddenly stop and Rogue to fall forward. You caught her, realizing that she wasn’t breathing.

“Come on,” you whispered, trying to get Rouge to wake.

“Y/N!” Logan shouted. He knew what you were going to do. “Don’t!”

You placed your hand on her head and she began to take your power from you. Your wounds opened up on your chest and you began bleeding out. Rogue gasped as she came to and pushed you away from her. You fell back, unconscious.

Chapter Text

“Y/N!” Logan roared as soon as he saw you fall back.

Logan leapt out of the head of the statue and used his claws to climb up the arm to the torch. When he got up there, he pulled you away from the edge and into his arms.

“I didn’t mean to!” Rouge exclaimed. “I didn’t mean to!”

Logan ignored Rogue, focusing on you and how deep the claw marks were that were now bleeding out. He had done that to you. He had caused that. His nose caught the scent of your blood and he was suddenly transported into a memory.

It was similar situation, where you were lying, bleeding out in his arms. Your wounds weren’t healing and he was crying over your body. You weren’t even breathing and he could almost still feel how cold you had been.

Logan pulled himself out of the memory as his ears honed in on your heartbeat and how it was still there. You were still alive. You were breathing and you were warm.

Scott had ran to get the jet, so that it would be easier to get you inside. He flew it up and tried to help Logan bring you inside, but Logan refused to let you go. The flight back to the mansion was completely silent. Jean watched you carefully from where she could until they landed.

“Logan,” Jean softly called. “I need to take Y/N to the lab.” Logan growled, holding you tighter to his chest. Jean knelt in front of Logan, trying to get him to look at her. “I’m only trying to help her. I think I can get her healing abilities to kick in, but you have to let me try.”

Logan nodded, his tension slowly releasing. He stood up and carried you into the lab where Ororo had set up a table near the Professor. Logan set you down but was hesitant to step away. It didn’t even truly know you or the history that the two of you shared, but Logan knew that he would do anything to protect you. He only needed you alive to be able to do that.

“Here,” Ororo pulled up a chair. “Sit. You can watch Jean without getting in her way.”

“Thanks,” Logan mumbled as he plopped himself down in the chair.

Logan watched Jean carefully as she took care of you. She bandaged you up before adding wires and tubes. Jean made sure to explain anything that she was doing that may cause Logan to grow upset with her. Once you were stabilized, Jean moved over to the Professor and began helping him. Logan moved the chair closer to you and gently took your hand, holding it between his hands.

~~~

Days past, with Logan refusing to leave your side until you woke. He fought off sleep as well as he could until it finally took over him. Jean came down to find Logan’s head resting on the table with you and his hand still holding yours. She smiled at the sight before moving over to the Professor to try and continue to guide him through his mind. Jean smiled when she noticed the Professor blinking.

“Welcome back,” she whispered, catching his attention. “I knew you’d find your way.”

“I had you to guide me,” he responded. “How did we do?”

Jean’s smile fell as she turned to look at where you and Logan were. Charles turned his head to see you bandaged up, still not fully healed, on the table with Logan asleep beside you.

“He hasn’t left her side,” Jean told him.

“Good,” Charles responded. “They need each other.”

~~~

Logan woke a few hours later to find that the Professor was no longer in the room. He felt revealed that the man was okay. If only you were. He stood up and looked you over. Peeling back the bandages, Logan realized that they had finally healed, leaving scares where his claws had marked you. Logan let his fingers lightly run over the scars. You jolted slightly, groaning as your hand went up to stop his hand.

“Oh!” You rasped. “That tickles.” You opened your eyes slowly to see Logan staring down at you, a mixture of emotions in his eyes. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he responded quietly. “How are you feeling?”

You did a quick mental scan of your body. You were sore and tired but alive. “Fantastic.”

“That was a stupid thing you did. You should have let me do it.”

“Did it work?”

“Yeah.”

“Then it doesn’t matter anymore… How’s Rogue?”

Logan chuckled. “She took on a few of your fiery personality traits for a while. Jean believes she developed a crush on me thanks to you.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah… I had to tell her that my heart belongs to someone else.” The air left your lungs as you stared up at Logan in shock. He quickly continued talking, not giving you room for a response. “I know that we have a long road ahead, but I… I saw your death. When I got to you on the torch, it was like I was reliving it.”

“I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head. “Don’t apologize… I don’t know who I am, or much about you, but I want to try. I want answers. I want to learn about you and who we were.”

“Okay.”

“It will be slow.”

“I know.”

“And it may not be the same—“

“Logan,” you lifted your hand to his cheek. “I know.”

Logan took your hand from his cheek and pressed a kiss to the palm of it. “I… I may have to leave to get some of the answers.”

“I’ll come—“

“I think it’s something I need to do on my own.”

“Oh.” You pulled your hand down. Fear gnawed at you. If he were to leave, would he ever return?

Logan could tell that you were not okay with the idea of him leaving on his own. “Y/N—“

“How’s the professor?”

Logan’s jaw clenched at your quick change of subject. “He’s fine.”

“Good.”

~~~

Jean discharged you as soon as Logan informed her that you were awake. Rogue was quick to find you and apologize but you brushed her off, saying that you’d do it again to protect her. You eventually found yourself in the briefing room with Logan and Charles after Charles had explored Logan’s mind as much as he could.

“There’s an abandoned military compound at Alkali Lake in the Canadian Rockies close to where we found you,” Charles explained as the table showed a diagram of the area. “There’s not much left but you might find some answers.”

“Thank you,” Logan said, staring at the diagram.

“Are you going to say goodbye to them?”

“Maybe.”

Logan brushed past you as he left the room. Charles sighed as he looked at you.

“Don’t let him leave without a goodbye,” Charles warned you.

You nodded. “Alright.”

~~~

Many of the students and faculty were on the main floor, watching the television. You were leaning in the doorway, nervously waiting for Logan to come back down the stairs. You knew he was up there packing and you absolutely hated it.

Logan could see you from the top of the stairs, waiting for him. He hated the thought of leaving you, but he needed to find these answers to on his own. He couldn’t risk you in case something went wrong.

You could hear Logan coming down the stairs. Slowly you turned to face him. Logan stopped a little ways in front of you.

“Walk me out?” He wondered.

You nodded. The two of you walked into the entry way in silence. Logan stopped at the door, turning to face you.

“Let me come with you,” you requested.

“I can’t have that, sweetheart,” Logan told you. “I need to go on my own.”

“Why? I have fought those people who experimented on you too. I can take care of myself if something goes wrong.”

“I trust you. It’s them I don’t trust. You told me that they killed you to get to me. I can’t let that happen again, especially if they are successful.”

“Logan—“

“No. I’ll be back.”

“Will you?”

Logan tore his dog tags from his neck and handed them to you. “Now you have mine and I have yours.” He leaned forward and kissed your forehead. “I’ll be back. I promise. I still want your side of the story. All of it.”

You watched as Logan left, walking down to the end of the property. He turned to see you standing at the window. He gave a nod before taking Scott’s motorcycle and driving away.

Chapter Text

Logan’s journey to Alkali Lake was not a straight shot. Only because he kept growing nervous about what he may find there. He hated the thought of leaving you at the mansion, waiting for him, but he had to do this at his own pace. Logan hoped that you could understand this.

Just as Charles had said, Logan found Alkali Lake abandoned and, to his knowledge, mostly destroyed. He hated himself for thinking that he could possibly find answers here. Answers that wouldn’t force you to relive the trauma of your own past. But there was nothing, not even a memory resurfaced.

Logan decided to take his time going back to the mansion, not wanting to face you quite yet.

~~~

The front windows quickly became your most frequented spot. If you weren’t teaching or training, you could be found holding Logan’s dog tags while staring out the window. You were either teased about your new hobby or reminded to keep on living. But you couldn’t help yourself. Logan had promised to return, yet the months dragged on. Charles stopped you every time you tried to go after him.

“He needs time,” Charles would tell you. “There are something’s Logan must deal with on his own.”

You hated it. You didn’t want Logan to deal with anything on his own anymore. You wanted to be there to help him. So you waited.

While you waited, you began to notice Jean’s lack of control over her own powers growing. She constantly brushed your concerns off, but you knew it was becoming more and more of a problem. Scott didn’t believe her either. Jean had been different since Liberty Island. She was having dreams that shook the whole mansion.

Currently, you were at a museum for a school-wide field trip. You were with a group of students when all the screens began to go in and out. You turned to look at Jean. Her eyes were closed and she was twitching, something was going on in her head. Scott called her name, breaking her out of it and returning the screens to normal. Letting Scott take care of it, you focused back on the children that you had been put in charge of. But before you knew it, everyone but the students and faculty were frozen. Like time had stopped.

“Shit,” you said, hurrying over to the food court, where Charles was reprimanding Rogue, Bobby, and Pyro.

“The next time you feel like showing off, don’t,” he told them, his tone leaving nothing to question.

“Breaking news,” the anchor on the tv said, pulling everyone’s attention. “We’re coming to you live from Washington where there’s been an attack in the Oval Office of the White House. Details are still coming in, but we have been informed that the President and Vice President were not harmed. Sources say the attack involved one or more mutants.”

“I think it’s time to leave, Professor,” said Scott.

“I think you’re right,” Charles agreed.

~~~

Back at the school, Scott, Jean, Charles, Ororo, and yourself met up in Charles’ office.

“My opinion? Magneto’s behind this,” Scott said.

“No, I don’t think so, Scott,” Jean disagreed.

“While Erik is capable of organizing something like this from prison, for him, it would be irrational,” Charles explained. “It would only hurt his goal of mutant prosperity.”

“You mean superiority,” Scott corrected.

“You’re right. If Erik had his way.”

“Of course, you know how the government with respond,” Ororo cut in. “They’ll reintroduce the Registration Act.”

“Or worse. The President could declare a state of emergency. Place every mutant in the country under arrest.”

“Hank is working on this, right?” You asked.

“Of course. But there’s only so much he can do.”

“Do you think the assassin was working alone?” Jean wondered.

“Well, we’ll only know that if we find him before the authorities do. I’ve been trying to track him using Cerebro but his movements are inexplicably erratic. When I have more exact coordinates, Storm, Jean, I’ll need you to take the jet and try and pick him up.”

~~~

You were upstairs when you heard the sound of a motorcycle pulling up. Your heart picked up its pace at the thought of Logan finally returning. When you reached the top of the stairs, Rogue was already down there with Logan.

“You miss me, kid?” Logan asked with a smirk as they briefly hugged.

“Not really,” Rogue said, teasingly.

“Hmm. How are you doing?”

“I’m okay. How are you?”

Logan made a face before noticing Bobby. “Who’s this?”

“Oh, this is Bobby. He’s my—“

“I’m her boyfriend,” Bobby said, shaking Logan’s hand. Bobby sent a layer of ice onto Logan’s hand. “Call me Iceman.”

“Right,” Logan said, unsure as he pulled his hand away. “Boyfriend? So how do you guys…?”

“Well, we’re still working on that.”

“Logan,” you called, finally coming down the stairs.

Logan couldn’t face you fast enough. Just hearing your voice did something to him. He couldn’t stop the large grin that took over his lips. “Hey, sweetheart.”

Logan came over, meeting you at the bottom of the stairs. The two of you stood there awkwardly, not knowing how to greet each other. Do you hug? Kiss? High-five? Rogue and Bobby watched on with great amusement.

“Look who’s come back,” Ororo commented, breaking the tension as she headed down the stairs. “Just in time.”

“For what?” Logan asked.

“We need a baby-sitter.”

“Baby-sitter?”

“Nice to see you again, Logan.”

“Hi, Logan,” Jean said, smiling down at him.

“Hi, Jean,” he responded with a smile. Your heart dropped at the way he looked at her.

“I should go and get the jet ready,” Ororo said before walking off.

“Yeah, well, it was good to meet you,” Bobby told Logan. “Come on, let’s go.” Bobby pulled Rogue away.

“Bye, Logan,” Rogue said. “I’ll see you later.”

“Okay,” Logan said.

“Storm and I are heading to Boston,” Jean said. “We won’t be gone long. The Professor wants us to track down a mutant who attacked the President.”

“So it was a mutant?”

“You’ll be here when we get back? Unless you plan on running off again.”

Logan inhaled deeply looking over at you. “Well, I can probably think of a few reasons to stick around.” His brows pinched together as he noticed that you weren’t as excited to see him as before. Had he done something wrong? Had he left you waiting too long?

“Find what you were looking for, Logan?” Scott interrupted, coming from down the hall.

“More or less.”

“I’ll see you all later,” Jean said, turning to kiss Scott.

“Be safe, okay?” Scott told Jean.

“You, too.”

“Bye,” Jean smiled back at Logan before walking off.

“Aren’t you gonna welcome me home?” Logan taunted. He threw Scott’s motorcycle keys at him. “Your bike needs gas.”

Scott threw them back. “Then fill her up.” Scott marched off.

“Still a dick I see.” He chuckled, hoping it would get you to laugh, though it failed. “Hey, I’m sorry for getting interrupted like that.”

“It’s fine,” you shrugged, not meeting his eye.

His hand came up and guided your chin, forcing you to look at him. “No, it’s not.”

“Seriously, it’s fine. I’ve got to go anyway,” you pulled away. “I’ve got a class to teach.”

“Y/N.”

You ignored the call of your name, rushing for your classroom.

~~~

Logan found Charles in Cerebro. He entered the machine with a cigar lit and in his mouth.

“Logan, my tolerance for your smoking in the mansion notwithstanding,” Charles said, “continue smoking that in here and you’ll spend the rest of your days under the belief that you’re a six-year-old girl.”

Logan took the cigar from his mouth. “You’d do that?”

“I’d have Y/N braid your hair. Welcome back.”

Charles placed the helmet on while the doors shut behind them. Logan gasped as he put the cigar out using the palm of his hand.

“You want me to leave?” Logan wondered.

“No,” Charles replied. “Just don’t move.” Suddenly the room lit up with a world map. Logan looked at it in awe. “These lights represent every living person on the planet. White lights are humans.” The screen turned from white to red. “And these are the mutants. Through Cerebro, I’m connected to them. And they to me. You see, Logan? We’re not as alone as you think.”

“I found the base at Alkali Lake. There was nothing there.”

Charles continued explaining, ignoring Logan. “The broken line represents the path of the mutant who attacked the President. I’ve been finding it difficult to get a lock on him.”

“Well, can’t you just concentrate harder?”

“If I wanted to kill him, yes. There! Looks like he’s finally stopped running.”

Charles closed his eyes and turned off Cerebro.

“I need you to read my mind again,” Logan requested.

“Logan,” Charles placed the helmet down and turned to face him, “I’m afraid the results will be the same as before.”

“We had a deal.”

“The mind is not a box that can be simply unlocked and opened. It’s a beehive with a million different compartments.”

“Spare me the lecture.”

“I know that your amnesia and adamantium skeleton are all connected. You know that too. But, Logan, sometimes the mind needs to discover things for itself.” Logan scoffed. “Have you seen Y/N yet? Talked to her?”

“I can’t do that to her,” he shook his head. “Forcing her to talk about it will only bring up her own trauma.”

“And Is she willing to talk about it?”

“Yes.”

“Then it is her choice to make.” Charles began rolling away. “I promise you, we’ll talk again when I return. If you will be kind enough to watch over the children with Y/N tonight, Scott and I are going to visit an old friend.”

~~~

Logan found you in a classroom. It was no longer filled with students, but you were still in there grading. Logan’s lips lifted ever so slightly at the sight of his dog tags around your neck. He cleared his throat as he entered the room.

“How did the class go?” Logan asked.

“Fine,” you responded, sitting up to look at him.

“I’m still sorry about getting interrupted. I wanted to talk to you more.”

“Seriously, Logan, it’s fine. Did you find any answers while you were away?”

“No,” he shook his head. “There was nothing there.”

“I’m sorry, Logan. I wish that there was a way for me to better share my memories with you.”

He sighed. “If you still are okay with it, I’d love to hear your side of things.”

“Okay. When would you be up to it?"

“How about tonight? Once the students are in bed? We could meet in the common living room.”

“I’ll be there.”

Chapter Text

Logan couldn’t remember another time in his life that he had been this nervous. He couldn’t even understand why he was feeling this way. It’s not like they were going on a date… right?

“Shit,” he muttered as he paced his room.

Was this a date? Did you think of it that way? Did he want it to be a date? Yes, Logan was having feelings for you, but it was all confusing. He couldn’t separate current feelings with past feelings and what maybe him just getting attached because you had known him before his memories disappeared. Logan couldn’t lead you on. Not when he didn’t know where he stood. You deserved so much better than that.

Maybe the nerves were that Logan wasn’t ready to know the truth yet. He didn’t want to put you through the trauma of talking about your past. Logan sighed, running a hand down his face. He was definitely over thinking this. But how could he not?

Besides, did you want anything to do with him? Logan had left you for twenty-two—almost twenty-three years. Maybe you were ready to move on. His stomach dropped at the thought. What would he do if you didn’t want him anymore? He couldn’t stay here, that’s for sure. So did he really want to know what the two of you had if you weren’t going to want him anymore? Logan was sure that would only hurt you more.

~~~

You were nervous about meeting up with Logan. How was this going to go? Was this a date? Did Logan want you do to all the talking? You wanted to know how his twenty-two years without you were, but you didn’t want to press if it was going to be too hard for him. You needed to make things as comfortable for Logan as possible.

After putting the younger students to bed, you got to work. You threw together some snacks and retrieved some beer from under your bed. You set up in the common living room, anxiously moving items around and grabbing blankets. This had to be perfect. You wanted Logan to be comfortable as well as yourself. Eventually, you allowed yourself to sit down and wait with a book.

The time ticked away, with no sign of Logan anywhere. Sadness and frustration boiled within you. You ended up having to throw your book away after it caught on fire. Unable to sit still, you began pacing. You knew that Logan was still upstairs and it was taking so much of your energy to not go upstairs and chew him out. You couldn’t let yourself do that though. The two of you hadn’t set an exact time anyway. Maybe he was making sure that the students were in bed? Or maybe Rogue snagged him away for a moment?

Eventually, you found yourself sitting down, staring at the fireplace. Your hands nervous played with the dog tags around your neck as you dimmed and enlarged the flames in the fireplace. Slowly, though you fought against it, you fell asleep.

~~~

Logan hated himself. He knew that you were downstairs, he could hear you moving around and smell the smoke from your flames. He knew that you were waiting for him but no matter how many times his hand found the doorknob, he couldn’t twist it. Glancing at the clock by his bed, Logan sighed. It was late and he hadn’t heard you move in a little bit. He didn’t believe you had gone to bed because he would have heard you as your rooms shared a hall.

With a deep breath, Logan finally got the courage to open the door. Whatever he found down there, Logan knew he would need to fix. He would beg on his hands and knees if he had to in order for you to forgive him for being a dick. Logan’s hands grew clammy as he headed downstairs and towards the living room. His heart dropped when he stepped into the living room and found you asleep on the couch.

Looking around, Logan saw the fireplace was dimmed to embers and there were snacks and beers sit out on the coffee table. Guilt gnawed at Logan. He hadn’t showed up and you had everything ready for him. He needed to fix this, if you’d ever talk to him again anyway. Grabbing the snacks and beers, Logan headed to the kitchen to put everything away.

When he arrived in the kitchen, Bobby was already in there.

“Hey,” Bobby greeted. He noticed the snacks and beer in Logan’s arms. “Did you have a party?”

“No,” Logan gruffly responded as he began to try and find a home for the snacks.

“Are those beers yours or Y/N’s?”

“Y/N’s.”

“I saw her asleep on the couch… Weren’t you supposed to meet up with her?”

“Yes.” He opened a beer bottle and chugged some.

“I’m sure you had your reasons and that she’ll forgive you.”

“She shouldn’t.”

“Oh, trust me, she’ll whip your ass first. But she’ll forgive you.”

Logan nodded, thinking about you. He wanted to know you more. But did he truly deserve that? “How long you been here?”

“Couple years.”

“And your parents just sent you off to mutant school?”

“Actually, my parents think this is a prep school.”

“Oh, I see. I suppose lots of prep schools have their own dorms, campuses—“

“Jets.”

“So you and Rogue, huh?”

“Yeah. It’s not what you think. I’d like it to be, but it’s just… It’s just that it’s not easy when you wanna be closer to someone… but you can’t…. You know, I’ve seen how you look at Y/N… You have the chance to be with her.”

“It’s complicated.” He took another drink.

“I’m sure.”

Logan’s head snapped to the side as running footsteps caught his attention. He suddenly stood up, trying to hear them again.

“What it is?” Bobby asked, only to be shushed by Logan.

He moved out into the hallway as he continued to hear footsteps. A soldier slipped into the kitchen while Logan wasn’t looking, but Logan quickly jumped back into the room. He grabbed the soldier by the arms.

“You picked the wrong house, bub,” Logan told him.

A tremendous shrieking sounded from one of the students upstairs, hurting everyone’s ears. The soldier Logan had grabbed began shooting, forcing Bobby to duck and Logan to drag the soldier down. The soldier and Logan began fighting, with the soldier pulling out a knife. He cut Logan’s face but was shocked to see it quickly heal. Logan roared as his claws came out and he stabbed the soldier. He turned to check on Bobby who was peering over the counter.

“You alright?” Logan asked. Bobby nodded. Logan pulled Bobby into the hallway, but quickly stopped when they saw soldiers lining the halls. “Stay here.” He screamed as he began to fight off the soldiers.

~~~

You woke up with a gasp, your hands quickly covering your ears as the screaming pierced them. Something was wrong. Looking around, you noticed soldier’s coming towards you. You grunted as you threw a fireball at one of them. Without looking behind you, you jumped off the couch, only to be stopped by ramming into a chest. Before you could use your power, a collar was placed around your neck. Suddenly you felt weaker.

“Tell the Colonel, we got her,” the soldier ordered. The soldier put his lips to your ear. “Stryker’s going to be happy to see you.”

“NO!” You screamed, fighting against the soldier. You couldn’t go back to Stryker. “JAMES!” You tried as you struggled against the soldiers who joined in trying to restrain you. “LOGAN!”

Your scream died in your throat as a needle was jabbed into your shoulder and a toxin was pressed into you. The edges of your vision began to blur before you lost consciousness.

~~~

“NO!” Logan’s head spun at the sound of your screaming. “JAMES! LOGAN!”

“Y/N!” Logan yelled, trying to fight through the soldiers to get to you. How could he have forgotten about you? You had been asleep on the couch, totally unprepared for the attack. He should have gotten to you.

With more rage in him, Logan took out the soldiers. He helped the students he could to a hidden tunnel while still trying to make his way to you. It terrified him when he realized that he couldn’t smell your smoke. That meant that you weren’t fighting.

Hearing the front door slam open, Logan saw that Bobby, Rogue, and Pyro were standing there. Logan leapt off the railing with a roar, cutting down the soldiers in his way.

“Let’s go,” Logan said, once the soldiers were down. He led them to another hidden passage, making sure the three students were in before shutting it.

“Logan!” Rogue yelled as she noticed Logan not following them.

Logan stood in the hallway as more soldiers came, claws out. “You wanna shoot me? Shoot me!”

“Don’t shoot him!” William Stryker ordered. “Not yet.” He walked down the hall, towards Logan. “Wolverine? Well, I must admit, this is certainly the last place I’d expect to find you. How long has it been? Twenty-two years? You haven’t changed one bit. Me, on the other hand,” he motioned to himself, “nature.”

Logan tensed, not recognizing the man. He looked over were he heard someone being dragged closer. It was you. You had a collar around your neck and unconscious. Logan’s jaw clenched as the man in front of him ran a finger down your face.

“She hasn’t changed a bit either,” Stryker said.

“Let her go,” Logan demanded.

“It’s not surprising to find her here. But I didn’t realize Xavier was taking in animals. Even animals as unique as you.”

“Who are you?”

“You really don’t remember?”

Flashes of memories played in his mind. You, Logan, and Stryker with other men, fighting. Stryker standing above Logan as he prepared for experimentation.

Stryker held your face in his hands. “Do you remember her?” He taunted. “How you cried over her body when I faked her death? Maybe this time it will be real.” He smirked. “Maybe, this time, she doesn’t come back from this.”

Logan roared but before he could charge, a thick wall of ice was separating him from you.

“No!” Logan yelled.

“Logan!” Rogue said, running up to him. “We’ve got to go!”

“They have her! They have Y/N!” He went to punch through the wall, but Rogue stopped him.

“We can’t do anything about that right now. We have to get out of here.”

“I can’t leave her!”

Stryker grabbed a bomb and connected it to the large wall of ice. Rogue pulled at Logan more urgently.

“We don’t have a choice! Come on!”

Logan glanced back at the wall before following the students into the hidden passage before the wall came crashing down. Stryker was angry to find Logan no longer there when the wall disappeared.

“Come on,” he ordered. “We need to get what he need and get out of here. It’s time to continue what we started Weapon XII.”

Chapter Text

“Logan, you’re going to break the steering wheel,” Rogue said as she watched Logan’s grip on it only tighten. He simply remained glaring at the road. “Cyclops is not going to be happy—“

“Don’t care,” he replied gruffly.

“We’ll get her back, Logan.”

“I should have fought harder. I should have went to her immediately.”

“It’s not your fault.”

Logan seemed to not even hear Rogue. “If I had just been down there already, with her, I could have—“

“This is not going to help her.”

“Did you know that man?”

“Stryker. His name is Stryker.”

“I can’t remember.” Logan’s grip tightened on the steering wheel.

“Where are we headed anyway?” Pyro wondered, acting like this situation was no big deal.

“Storm and Jean are in Boston,” Logan explained. “We’ll head that way.”

“My parents live in Boston,” Bobby offered.

“Good.”

“We’ll get her back, Logan,” Rogue tried to comfort.

“We better.”

~~~

There was still a collar around your neck when you woke. You tried to move to grab at it, but you were cuffed down by the wrists and ankles. Turning your head as much as you could to the side, you noticed that Scott was in a similar situation. Your stomach dropped. If Stryker had Scott, that meant he had Charles too. You couldn’t let anymore of your family be hurt by Stryker. He had already taken too much from you.

“Ah! She’s awake,” Stryker stated as he entered the room. Your blood ran cold at his voice. “It’s been far too long, Y/N.”

“Not long enough,” you grumbled.

“I know that we didn’t end on the best note—“

“You shot James in the head! He lost all his memories!”

“He seemed to still find his way back to you. I guess that’s true love for you.” Stryker walked over to Scott, examining him.

“What do you want with him?”

“I need another mindless slave. Soon you’ll be one too. Though, you’re going to be more than a mindless slave. You’ll help create the next generation of mutants—of weapons.”

A group of people in lab coats entered the room, each going to a different location like it was rehearsed. Your cuffs suddenly became impossibly tighter, including the collar around your neck. An electric current began to flow through the collar, causing you to scream out in pain. Scott screamed out as well, the same thing happening to him.

Stryker’s laugh echoed as he left the room.

~~~

When they arrived at Bobby’s parents house, Logan decided he needed some form of alcohol. Something to try to wash what he was feeling down. The guilt. The regret. The terror. He had tried and failed to get in contact with Jean or Ororo, which was a whole other problem. Logan opened the fridge and sniffed around for the closest thing he could find to alcohol. Quickly grabbing it, he began chugging it. Suddenly, he stumbled back as a memory hit him.

He was in a warehouse. Stryker was there. You had been tossed over to Logan and he barely caught you. You whispered is name. His real name.

“I’m here, baby,” he whispered, his face up against yours as he tried to force himself to believe that you were real. “I’m right here… I’m going to get you out of here. They aren’t going to hurt you again.”

Logan shook his head, exiting the memory. He had failed you. He had told you that Stryker would never hurt you again. Didn’t matter that he didn’t remember that promise until just now. He had failed you, once again. With a groan, Logan leaned his head against the fridge, letting himself dwell in his emotions.

~~~

You don’t know how long you were tortured for. In the midst of it, both you and Scott had been flipped onto your stomaches and drilled into at the base of your necks. They had somehow found something that wouldn’t get immediately kicked out of your system due to your healing ability and inserted it. You were turned around and the table was lifted to put you in an upright position. Stryker waltzed in with a smile.

“Almost there, Y/N,” he told you. “I do wish that it didn’t have to be this way. You were once a good soldier.”

“Logan will find you,” you told him with a snarl. “And he will kill you.”

“Not unless you kill him first.”

Before you could retort, Stryker shoved your head down and injected some liquid into whatever device they put at the base of your neck. Your mind quickly went blank, eyes dilated.

“Hello, Weapon XII,” Stryker greeted. “Ready for your first assignment?”

~~~

While Logan was listening to Bobby trying to explain being a mutant to his family, Logan’s comms device rang. He quickly went out back onto the porch and answered it.

“Jean?” He answered.

“Logan!” She responded. “What is going on? No one is responding!”

“The mansion was raided. A guy named Stryker. No one’s left, Jean. Soldiers came.”

“What about the children?” Ororo asked.

“Some of them escaped. I’m not sure about the rest… They took Y/N.”

“We haven’t been able to reach the Professor or Scott either,” Jean said.

“Where are you, Logan?” Ororo wondered.

“Boston,” he answered, “with Bobby Drake’s family.”

“Okay. We’re on our way.”

“And Storm? Make it fast.” He hung up and headed for the house. He paused, hearing rustling in the bushes. “We have to go now.”

“Why?” Rogue asked.

“Now!”

“Logan, what’s wrong?”

Logan’s claws extended as he walked out onto the front porch. Rogue, Pyro, and Bobby were right behind him. Police officers quickly made their presence known from all sides.

“Drop the knives,” one ordered, coming up from the side with a gun up, “and put your kinds in the air.”

“What’s going on here?” Logan asked.

“Ronny,” Bobby muttered.

“I said drop the knives,” the officer repeated.

Glass shattered from inside the house, causing Rogue to squeal and everyone to face the door.

“This is just a misunderstanding,” Logan tried to reason.

“Put the knives down!”

“I can’t… Look.”

Logan lifted his hands up, but before he could show the officers, one of them shot him in the head. Logan dropped, presumably dead. Rogue shrieked.

“All right, the rest of you, on the ground now!” The officer ordered. Bobby and Rogue obeyed, with Pyro staying standing. “Look, kid, I said on the ground.”

“We don’t want to hurt you, kid,” the female officer stated.

“You know all those dangerous mutants you hear about on the news?” Pyro said. He opened the lighter in his hand. “I’m the worst one.”

Using the flame, he shot fire towards the officers in all directions. He didn’t stop, enjoying the feeling of the power. He continued to do damage, shooting large lengths of fire out. Rogue could see that the power was getting to him. She ripped off one of the gloves Bobby had given to her and grabbed Pyro’s ankle. Pyro gasped as Rogue channeled his power and extinguished the flames. Rogue didn’t let go until the flames were gone and Pyro was weakened.

The bullet that Logan had been shot with fell out of his head just before he woke. The wind began whirling all around as the jet lowered close to the house. Logan stood, making sure the kids got to the jet safely. Ororo and Jean were in the co-pilot seats while the mutant they had picked up was seating nearby.

“Who the hell is this?” Asked Logan as he sat and buckled up.

“Kurt Wagner,” the blue mutant responded. “But in the Munich circus, I was known as the Incredible Nightcrawler—“

“Yeah, save it. Storm?”

“We’re outta here,” she told him.

“Whoa.”

Logan gripped onto the chair tighter as the jet lifted back up into the air. He closed his eyes, trying to imagine you were there, holding his hand. When the jet steadied, Logan unbuckled and walked closer to the front.

“How far are we?” Logan wondered.

“We’re actually coming up on the mansion now,” Jean said.

“I’ve got two signals approaching,” Ororo said. “Coming in fast.”

“Unidentified aircraft,” a voice came over the radio, “you are ordered to descend to 20,000 feet. Return with our escort to Hanscom Air Force Base. You have seconds to comply.”

“Wow. Somebody’s angry.”

“I wonder why,” Logan muttered, looking at Pyro.

“We are coming up alongside you to escort you to Hanscom Air Force Base,” the voice continued. The two planes came up on either side of the cockpit windows. “Lower your altitude now. Repeat, lower your altitude to 20,000 feet. This is your last warning.”

“They’re falling back,” Ororo stated when the jets disappeared. Rapid beeping came from the controls. “They’re marking us.”

“What?” Logan said.

“They’re gonna fire. Hang on!”

Logan stumbled to sit back down as Ororo turned the plane. He quickly buckled up right before Jean turned the jet around completely.

“Please don’t do that again,” Pyro requested.

“I agree,” Logan said, feeling more uneasy. They didn’t have time for any of this. He needed to get to you. “Don’t we have any weapons in this heap?”

Ororo summoned her powers, bring in large storm clouds, lightning and tornadoes. Jean tried her best to maneuver the jet to avoid the other planes. It didn’t take long to lose one of them. When Jean saw that the other pilot ejected, she slowed down, signaling Ororo to pull the clouds away.

“Everybody okay back there?” Asked Jean.

“No,” Logan replied.

The controls began frantically beeping as two missiles headed for the jet. Jean channeled much of her strength to stop one of the missiles, but wasn’t strong enough to fully stop the other. The missile hit the back of the jet, tearing it open. The jet began falling from the sky. Rogue screamed as she got ripped out of the jet, her seatbelt having never buckled.

“Rogue!” Bobby shouted.

“No!” Logan screamed. He couldn’t lose another person he cared about. Not like this.

Suddenly, Kurt disappeared only to quickly reappear at the back of the jet with Rogue in his arms. The force caused them to tumble to the front as the jet plummeted. Logan grabbed onto your dog tags that hung from his neck, silently apologizing to you in case this was the end.

The sound of metal scraping had everyone’s heads turned to the back of the jet. The jet seemed to be fixing itself. The jet began to slow before suddenly stopping.

“Jean?” Ororo called.

“It’s not me!” She replied.

They all looked out the window to see Magneto with his hand up, controlling the jet, and Mystique beside him.

~~~

Using the supplies in the jet, the crew set up camp. Eventually, Jean, Ororo, Logan, Magneto, and Mystique ended up away from the others, surrounding a fire.

“His name is Colonel William Stryker,” Magneto explained, “and he invaded your mansion for one purpose: he wanted Cerebro. Or enough of it to build one of his own.”

“But that doesn’t make any sense,” Jean said. “Stryker would need the Professor to operate it.”

“Which I think is the only reason why our friend’s still alive.”

“Oh, my God,” Ororo exclaimed.

“Now, what are you all so afraid of?” Logan asked.

“While Cerebro is working, Charles’ mind is connected to every living person on the planet,” explained Magneto. “If he were forced to concentrate hard enough on a particular group, let’s say, mutants for example, he could kill us all.”

“Wait a minute,” Ororo said. “How would Stryker even know where to find Cerebro in the first place?”

“Because I told him. I helped Charles build it, remember? Mr. Stryker has powerful methods of persuasion. Even against a mutant as strong as Charles.”

“So who’s this Stryker anyway?” Jean wondered.

“He’s a military scientist. He spent his whole life trying to solve the mutant problem. If you want a more intimate perspective, why don’t you ask Wolverine?” Logan looked around, confused. “You don’t remember, do you? William Stryker, the only other man I know who can manipulate adamantium. The metal on your bones? It carries his signature.”

“But the Professor—“

“The Professor trusted you were smart enough to discover this on your own,” Magneto interrupted Logan. “Or with Y/N’s help. He gives you more credit than I do.”

“Why do you need us?” Ororo wondered.

“Mystique has discovered plans of a base that Stryker’s been operating out of for decades. We know that’s where he’s building the second Cerebro, but we don’t know where this base is. And I believe one of you might.”

“The Professor already tried,” Logan said.

“Once again, you think it’s all about you.”

Magento looked up, allowing everyone to realize that Kurt had been in the trees listening in. Kurt sheepishly came down at sat by the fire.

“I didn’t mean to snoop,” he told Jean.

“Just try and relax,” Jean said. She lifted her hands to his head and entered his mind. Gasping, she released her hold. “Stryker’s at Alkali Lake.”

“That’s where the Professor sent me,” Logan stated. “There’s nothing left.”

“There’s nothing left on the surface, Logan. The base is underground.”

~~~

When Logan thought couldn’t get anymore angry at himself, now he was furious. He paced at the end of the jet stairs, huffing a cigar. Why didn’t he think to look underground? If he had, would you have been taken? Would Logan have been able to stop Stryker before all this could happen?

Not to mention that Logan was growing more worried for your safety with each passing second. What were Stryker’s plans for you? And would Logan be too late whenever they ended up there?

“Hey,” Jean greeted as she came down the stairs.

“Hey,” he huffed, focusing on his spiraling thoughts.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure?”

“What do you think?” He inhaled, turning to face her. “How we doing?”

“Not good,” Jean sighed, wiping her hands off with a rag. “It’ll take four or five hours before I can get it off the ground.”

“Great.” He shook his head with a scoff.

“I’m trying my best, Logan.”

“It’s not enough! Y/N is there, with Stryker! Something that I promised would never happen again!”

“You remember that?”

“Yeah, I do,” he chuckled darkly. “And the cruel matter of it all is that I remembered after she was taken. So it doesn’t matter now!” He began pacing again. “I should have been with her anyway if I wasn’t so chicken. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up in my own fears, I would have been down there with her when they came.”

“They would have fought to get to her. Stryker probably wanted her back.”

“I would have fought harder.” He fell back onto one of the steps, head hanging. “Did you know about her history with Stryker?”

Jean sighed. “Y/N has never opened up about the specifics of her past. She didn’t want to talk about you, it seemed. I did know that she had gone through trauma. But not who caused it and what it was.”

“Stryker faked her death to get to me… at least that’s what I’ve pieced together… I don’t put it past him to do something worse this time around.”

“We’ll get to her, Logan. We’ll get her back and Scott and the Professor.”

“And what then? I don’t even know where to start with her. Y/N remembers having a whole relationship and I remember fragments. Not enough to make sense of anything.”

“Do you care for her?”

Logan waited to respond, searching his own emotions. “I do… Too much. But it’s all…” He tapped the side of his head.

“Then how about you start at the beginning?”

Logan shook his head. “She doesn’t deserve that.”

“I’m sure she’ll do it… for you.”

Logan went silent, focusing on his cigar and his thoughts. Maybe Jean was right. Perhaps starting over, a clean slate, would be what’s best for the both of you. Logan vowed that when he rescued you, he would be honest with you and figure out how to start back at the beginning.

Chapter Text

Rogue, Bobby, and Pyro weren’t happy to be left on the jet while the others followed the plan and entered the Alkali base. Mystique went in first, disguised as Logan. As soon as she was able to gain control from the inside, she opened the spillway doors and allowed the others to enter the base. Logan stepped inside and immediately sniffed. He caught wind of your scent. It was barely there, but it was there. The group met Mystique in the control room.

“Have you found it?” Magneto asked, going up to the controls.

“A large portion of the energy from the dam has been diverted to this chamber,” Mystique explained, showing the map of the base on the screen.

“Cerebro,” Ororo whispered.

“There is it,” Magneto said.

“Can you shut it down from here?”

“No.”

“Come,” Magneto said to Mystique. “There’s little time.”

“Not without us,” Jean told him.

“Oh my God,” Ororo said, noticing one of the screens. “The children. Kurt, will you come with me?”

“Yes.”

As the others continued talking, Logan looked over the monitors, trying to see if he could find you anywhere. He caught sight of Stryker, most likely head towards Cerebro. If he couldn’t locate you immediately, then the next best thing was Stryker. The others were too busy forming a plan to see Logan slip his comms device out of his ear and head out of the room.

~~~

Stryker marched down the halls, headed for Cerebro.

“Make sure Weapon XII is ready,” he ordered. “I need more time.”

“Yes, sir,” one of the soldiers replied.

The soldier signaled a few others to follow him and headed to where you were being kept. You were still upright, chained to the table. The soldiers entered and one of them was quick to insert you with another dose of liquid. Then they unchained you, helping you to the ground.

“Weapon XII,” the soldier called. “You are ordered to protect Colonel Stryker. He needs more time.”

With a simple nod, you headed out with one objective: protect Stryker.

~~~

Logan was growing more frantic as he searched the base for you or Stryker. He kept coming up empty, going from room to room, hallway to hallway. The whole base was a maze. Suddenly he stopped, hearing something from down another hallway that sounded familiar. Logan headed over and down a flight of stairs into a dimly lit room. In the center of it, there was a tank of water, with his x-ray’s behind it.

Logan inhaled sharply, closing his eyes as memories of his skeleton being grafted with adamantium filled his head. Snapping his eyes opened, Logan continued to explore the room, with each piece he remembered more and more of that day. The revenge. The anger. The fight to get out of there before they erased his memories.

“The tricky thing about adamantium is,” Stryker spoke up from behind Logan, “that if you ever manage to process its raw, liquid form, you gotta keep it that way.” He walked around, moving into Logan’s line of sight. “Keep it hot. Because once the metal cools, it’s indestructible. But you already know that. I used to think you were one of a kind, Wolverine. I was wrong.”

Logan clenched his jaw, but before he could take a move towards Stryker, your scent filled his nostrils. You stepped out of the dark, moving to stand between Logan and Stryker.

“Y/N,” Logan breathed out. There was no recognition in your eyes as you stared Logan down.

“Y/N has always been one of my favorite soldiers,” Stryker taunted. “She just needed a little reminder.”

“What did you do?”

“Enough.” Stryker walked away, leaving the two of you at a stand still.

“I won’t hurt you.” You didn’t give Logan a verbal response. You simply stepped forward, fire forming around your fists. “Y/N, it’s me. It’s Logan.”

If this was just a little bit about how you felt towards him not knowing you, Logan would forever be sorry for the pain he caused. Looking at you without you knowing who he was, was torture.

“Y/N—“

You cut him off with a large fire ball, throwing Logan back into one of the concrete posts. With a groan, Logan stood up and spun around you face you.

“I’m not going to fight you, sweetheart. I can’t do it.”

You began to rapid fire, fireballs in his direction. He did his best to dodge them while trying to get you to remember him. Logan wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he harmed you. He had to find a way to wake you up from whatever Stryker had done to you.

Blasting him back again, Logan slid against the ground. You marched towards him, hands warming up again. He muttered an apology as one of his legs swung out and brought you to the ground. He quickly straddled you, pinning your arms over your head. You thrashed around, trying to brake out of his tight grip. Your skin started to heat up and Logan clenched his jaw, groaning at the pain.

“Come on, sweetheart,” he tried to get you to come to. “It’s me. It’s James.”

You snarled at him, trying to break lose as your skin burned his skin.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” he told you. “I promise I wanted this scenario to be very different.”

In a blink of an eye, Logan was leaning down and kissing your lips. Slowly, you began to lose your fight against him. He broke the kiss and looked down at you, hoping that his idea had worked. You were blinking up at him.

“J—James?” You rasped.

Logan felt almost instant relief. “It’s me, sweetheart.” His voice was calm, yet full of concern. You burst into tears as you remembered the torture and the mind control. Logan quickly got off of you and pulled you into him. “I’m right here, darlin’. I’ve got you.” He held a kiss to your head as your arms tightened around him.

“I’m so sorry.”

“It wasn’t your fault. You had no control… I’m the one who should be apologizing. I should have been there with you when they raided the mansion. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah… We really need to have a talk.”

“Tell me about it.”

“I meant it. About everything. Including how you got me out of that trance.”

“I couldn’t hurt you.”

“I appreciate it. Now— ah!”

Both you and Logan cried out in pain as a high-pitched vibrating noise echoed through your minds. Your hands grabbed your head and Logan held you closer to his chest. The two of you stayed together as you groaned in pain. When the sound suddenly stopped, Logan quickly had your face in his hands, cradling it.

“Are you all right?” He asked.

“I’m fine,” you panted. “You?”

“Fine. Come on.” Logan pulled you up. “We’ve got to get Stryker and help the others.”

Logan pulled you along, sniffing out the trail that Stryker had left. He led you outside, where Stryker was readying a helicopter. Logan let go of your hand, decking Stryker in the face and causing him to fall into the snow. He pulled Stryker up and shoved him into the helicopter before punching his claws into Stryker’s side. Stryker screamed out in pain.

“How does it feel, bub?” Logan snarled.

Stryker smiled through the pain. “Why did you come back?”

“You cut me open! You took my life!”

“You make it sound as if I stole something from you. As I recall, it was you who volunteered for the procedure. To get revenge for her death.” Stryker motioned to where you were standing over to the side.

Logan pressed his claws into Stryker further. “Who am I?”

“You… are just a failed experiment.” Logan’s other set of claws inserted into Stryker, causing the man to cry out. “If you really knew about your past… what kind of person you were… the work we did together… People don’t change, Wolverine. You were animal then. You’re an animal now.”

“He’s not an animal!” You retorted, stepping closer. “And he did change! We both had until you showed up and ruined our lives—our future!”

Stryker laughed. “And I don’t regret it one bit.”

Before you could burn Stryker alive, a loud alarm began blaring throughout the area.

“What the hell is that?” Logan asked. “What is it?!”

“The dam’s ruptured,” Stryker answered. “It’s gonna flood water onto the spillway. It’s trying to relieve the pressure. It’s too late. In a few minutes, we’ll all be underwater. Come with me, and I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

“Bullshit!” You exclaimed.

“She doesn’t know everything that happened. She can’t answer all your questions.”

“She knows enough,” Logan responded.

“You can’t help your friends. They’re as good as dead, Wolverine. You’re a survivor, always shave been.”

“Oh, I thought I was just an animal.” Logan threw Stryker down and chained him to the wheel of the helicopter. “If we die, you die.” He turned around and grabbed your hand. “Let’s go!”

The two of you ran back into the base, searching for your friends. As you ran through the base, the human soldiers began falling to the ground in pain.

“What’s happening?” You asked.

“Cerebro,” Logan muttered. “We’ve got to move faster.”

The two of you stumbled as the dam began to further broke, rumbling around you. Making it to the spillway, you saw your friends on the other side. Logan quickly used his claws to close the door that they were about to go through and that water was about to rush through from the other side.

“You don’t want to go that way,” said Logan. “Trust me.”

Water began to spilled through the doors.

“Come on!” You yelled. “There’s another way out of here!”

Grabbing one of the injured students, Logan led the way out to where you two had just left Stryker and the helicopter. Only neither of them were anywhere to be found.

“The helicopter was right here!” Logan exclaimed. The two of you shared a worried glance.

Low rumbling could be heard before the jet suddenly flew over the group and landed harshly into the snow. The group began to rush over when you heard a groan nearby. By yourself, you walked into the trees, following the sound. Not too far, Stryker was changed to a large cement block, dangling there.

“You can’t change him,” Stryker taunted upon seeing you. “You don’t have enough of the story.”

“I don’t care,” you murmured, twirling strands of fire in your hands. “I don’t need the whole story. I just need him, whatever that looks like.”

“I saved you… all those years ago, I pulled you out of homelessness. Gave you purpose, taught you about your abilities. I gave you what you have. Made you what you are.”

“Yes… but you also destroyed me. Destroyed my happiness… So, I’ll return the favor.” With a flick of your wrist, the metal chains against Stryker heated up. He cried out in pain as you stalked closer. “Goodbye, old friend.” Stryker screamed as he was engulfed in flames.

Back at the jet, Logan could hear the screams and smell your smoke.

“Y/N!” He shouted, looking around for you. “Y/N!” He rushed away from the jet only to find you walking out of the trees. He hurried over to you, hands coming to your arms as he looked you over. “Are you all right? What happened?”

“I needed to end it,” you looked up at Logan, almost like you were void of any emotion. “He caused all our pain… all our problems.” Logan quickly put together who you were talking about. “I had to stop him.”

Logan nodded, understanding where you were coming from. He pulled you into his side and led you onto the jet. There was panic on the jet, trying to get it up into the air. Logan helped you into a seat before rushing up to the front.

“What’s wrong?” He wondered.

“Vertical thrusters are off-line,” Scott told him.

“So fix ‘em.”

“I’m trying.”

“Hey, has anyone seen Pyro?” Rogue asked.

“He’s with Magneto,” Jean responded calmly.

Ororo and Scott kept working to get the controls back online. You watched as Jean’s eyes grew wider. You could tell something was going on. She spun around and headed down the stairs of the jet.

“Jean!” You called after her. “Jean!”

You ran over to the stairs to follow after her, only for her to use her powers to slam you into the ceiling of the jet.

“Y/N!” Logan shouted, rushing forward to catch you.

“She’s outside,” the Professor stated.

Scott jumped from his seat and ran for the stairs, only for Jean to close the staircase before Scott could get there. The jet suddenly came online as Jean walked in front of the jet.

“No! We’re not leaving!” Scott yelled. “Lower the ramp! Storm, lower it!”

The controls began working on their own. “I can’t!” Ororo responded, trying to control the jet herself. “She’s controlling the jet.”

Through the cockpit window, you could see the large wave heading towards you. Using her powers, Jean forced it to go around her and the jet.

“You, get her, now!” Logan ordered Kurt.

Kurt tried, only to not be able to move. “She’s not letting me.”

“Damn it!” Scott muttered.

“I know what I’m doing,” the Professor whispered, his eyes closed. Jean was talking through him. “This is the only way.”

Scott knelt in front of the Professor. “Jean, listen to me. Don’t do this.”

“Good-bye.”

“No, no, no, no!” You screamed.

The jet lifted higher until it was clear of the water. Then the water came crashing down where Jean stood.

“NO!” You shrieked.

Logan held onto you as you tried to free from his grasp. The way you were moving around could hurt you or someone else, and he couldn’t have that. He could feel your body temp rising and knew that he was the only one who could handle you.

“She’s gone…” Logan told you. “She’s gone.”

“Don’t you say that!” Scott shouted, whipping around to face you and Logan. “We gotta go back.”

“She’s gone.”

“No!” Scott cried, falling to his knees.

The jet quickly grew into sounds of cries and mourning. Logan was still wrestling with you, smoke beginning to come off of you.

“Rogue,” the Professor called, motioning to you.

“No,” Logan growled, pulling you into him further and backing up. “Don’t touch her.”

“She’ll just calm her powers enough so that she doesn’t set the jet on fire.”

“Let go of me,” you grumbled, seemingly unaware of the conversation around you. How could you be? Jean, your sister, your best friend, was gone. Tears sizzled down your face due to the heat of your skin.

A fire suddenly appeared in the corner of the jet. Bobby rushed over, putting it out with his ice. Logan gripped you tighter, ignoring the way you were searing into his skin.

“Come on, Y/N,” he begged. “You’ve got to calm down.”

“Rogue,” the Professor called again.

This time, Logan didn’t fight it. He held you tightly as Rogue took her glove off and placed her hand against your open skin. You gasped, immediately feeling the affections of Rogue’s power. The tension in your body melted away, making you limp, and your skin cooled down. Logan quickly moved to sweep you off your feet before you could completely give out. He walked back to one of the seats and sat down with you.

The Professor sighed, looking to Ororo. “We need to go to Washington DC.”

Chapter Text

Logan couldn’t take his eyes off of you as your group stood in the Oval Office. Charles has froze everyone but the President while Ororo created a storm outside for cover. Everyone else was staring at the President, but Logan couldn’t rip his eyes away from you. You were standing on the other side of Charles, one hand holding tightly to the back of the wheelchair like it was your lifeline. Logan was growing more concerned for you with each passing second. Stryker has tortured you, experimented on you, and forced you to become a mindless soldier. You then killed Stryker and watched Jean sacrifice herself. That would be a lot for anyone, but especially in the same day.

When your group got back to the mansion, Logan silently walked you to your room. He listened in carefully as he changed in his own room for any signs of distress from you. He was ready to jump in at a moments notice. Eventually, many of you made it down to Charles’ office.

“You know, even when Jean was a student, she was always hesitant about her powers,” Charles said. “Always looking to others… feeling that is someway, she was left behind.”

“Do you think—“ Scott’s emotions forced him to pause. “Could we have done more to save her?”

“In the past, she may have let us.”

“There had to be another way,” you whispered. “Why did she leave the plane?”

“Because she made a choice.” A knock sounded at the door. “Yes, come on in.”

Students began entering the office. You quickly left, Logan hot on your tail.

“Y/N,” he called. “Y/N, wait.” He reached forward to try and grab hold of your wrist.

You yanked your arms out of Logan’s reach and headed down the stairs to the lab. Logan continued to follow, only stopping with you finally reached the lab. You looked around at the area.

“Our relationship was an interesting one,” you said quietly. “Little sister, big sister… then it changed to best friends… I always knew that people would die around me because I’m slow to age… I just thought that I had a few more years left.”

“Is that why we dated? Because it could last?”

“No,” you shook your head. “We dated because we were already in love with each other… We left Stryker’s team and built a small house in the mountains. You were a lumberjack and I as a school teacher. We had a few years of awkward relationship status until one night changed that… Years passed and you proposed.” You looked down, taking the ring that lay between Logan’s dog tags between your fingers. “Then our peaceful life got interrupted and it was never the same again.”

“I wish I could remember all of that.”

“Me too.”

Logan slowly walked up to you, moving around to stand in front of you. “I… I talked with Jean. Before we went to Alkali, we talked.”

“About what?”

“You. Us.”

“And?”

“And I want to know what you know.”

“Okay.”

“But I also want to start over. I’m not the same person you fell in love with. I also am struggling with my own feelings on the whole thing. I know that it’s asking a lot of you to start over but—“

You shut him up by placing a hand over his mouth. “Starting over sounds perfect.”

~~~

The two of you stayed in the lab and talked through the night. You told him everything you knew about his life before you’d met him. His birthday. His half-brother Victor. The wars. Then you moved on to explain Stryker’s team. You told him about your teammates and your mission and the night that James had asked you to leave. You told him about building a new life after the team and how the two of you finally took action on your feelings. It became harder for you to go through what happened when you reached the proposal and Stryker reappearing in your lives. You told him how Victor put you down and how James somehow found you and buried you. You explained Stryker’s Island and what he was doing there. All the way up until the moment Stryker shot James and Charles forced you away from him.

Logan stayed quiet for the most part. Only speaking up when he had clarifying questions. He allowed you to take your time over the harder parts of the story, which you appreciated.

“I’m sorry,” is all he could say as he took all the information in once you were done.

You shrugged. “There’s really nothing we can do about it now… besides, it’s not your fault.”

“Thank you for finally telling me. I know it was hard.”

You gave him a soft smile. “You’re welcome.” A yawn suddenly took over, causing Logan to chuckle at you.

“Come on,” Logan stood up, pulling you along with him, “let’s get you to bed.”

“Not tired,” you mumbled.

“Whatever you saying, darlin’.” You stumbled, your body truly exhausted from everything you had gone through. “Up you go.”

Logan easily picked you up and carried you upstairs. Those who had actually slept through the night, were not up, getting ready for their day while you were just about to get some rest. Logan tucked you into bed and kissed your forehead. He paused at the door, glancing back at you. When you had told him about your shared past, you mentioned that you had nightmares like him. It made him wonder if recent events would cause those to resurface. He prayed to whatever God there could be that that wasn’t the case. You didn’t deserve the pain that Logan knew all too well.

~~~

As the days since Alkali lake passed, you and Logan began rekindling your friendship. Though you both had feelings towards one another, you both knew that you needed to get to know each other again. It started with mostly silent moments: eating together, walking together, sitting together. Logan would find you after your classes were through, sitting in your classroom with you as you graded assignments. The two of you soon began teasing each other and having lighthearted conversations.

You began to run the X-Men again, working in the Danger Room often with the next generation, Logan, Storm, and Scott. Though, more often than not, Scott would bail. He was not dealing well with Jean’s death. Logan wasn’t a big fan of team trainings, really only participating when Scott wouldn’t show and you begged him. He much preferred the training sessions where it was just you and him. He was constantly enamored by you during the sessions. How confident you were with your mutation and how well you could fight without it. It was becoming harder and harder to hold back his feelings with you.

It was growing harder for you as well. You were struggling to not slip back into old habits you thought had died long ago. Like the times Logan was in the kitchen when you woke. You longed to come up behind him and just hold him. Or when the two of you were walking side by side, your hand needed to be held back in order to not slip into Logan’s hand. There were also times the two of you would be talking and you felt like you were back at you home in the Canadian Rookies. But then you would say something and quickly have to take it back after the look on Logan’s face.

Logan and James were the same person, yet so different. James had been much more gentle and kind towards you and the world. Logan had a rougher exterior and wasn’t willing to open his heart up easily. James had bones for claws. Logan had adamantium, causing him to be a lot heavier. James slept, having the occasional nightmare. Logan never slept, only ever having nightmares. James had the memories of you two falling in love. Logan has bits and pieces that were barely there.

Logan could tell that you were having a hard time with the fact that he had changed. He knew that you were getting used to it and very willing to understand who he was now, but he could tell that sometimes it made you sad. You had all these memories that he didn’t have. Logan could also tell that you were having a hard time dealing with Jean’s death, the torment that you had gone through in Alkali, and killing Stryker. You would never admit it to him though, no matter how many times he asked how you were doing.

One night, you mind decided to be real cruel to you. You hadn’t had a nightmare yet, but tonight your mind decided to throw you back into Stryker’s clutches. He was torturing you, taunting you about the pain Logan had gone through and blaming you.

Logan had barely fallen asleep when his nose caught whiff of it. Your smoke. He sat up and sniffed a few times, making sure he wasn’t imagining things. Your familiar scream echoed through the air. Before Logan knew it he was out of bed and in front of your door. He whipped the door open, only to be greeted by an overwhelming fire. He stumbled back as it threatened to enter the hall.

“Y/N!” Logan yelled, trying to get your attention. “Y/N!”

The fire alarm sounded through the school, waking the students. The students rushed around in a panic until Charles came through their minds, telling them to get outside. Ororo appeared next to Logan as the flames threatened to exit your room.

“What’s going on?” Ororo wondered.

“I don’t know!” Logan responded. “Smelt the smoke and heard her scream.”

“Do you want me to try and put it out?”

“Can you do that?”

“I honestly don’t know. Maybe if she’s burnt a hole in the roof.”

You screamed out again.

“We can’t wait for that,” Logan muttered.

“What are you—Logan, no!”

But Ororo was too late. Logan headed into your burning room. He groaned as the flames attacked his skin and clothing. He continued to fight through the flames. Through the smoke and fire, Logan could see you thrashing around on your bed. You were whimpering and mumbling something he couldn’t understand.

“Y/N,” he coughed, kneeling on the bed beside you. “Y/N, wake up.” He grabbed your over heated skin, trying to gently shake you awake. “Pl—Please—sweetheart.” His coughs got worse as the smoke and flames thickened.

“Logan!” He could hear Ororo cough from outside.

“GO!” He shouted back at her. He knew that you would never forgive yourself if anyone got hurt. “Baby, I need you to wake up!”

You sat up with a start. Your eyes were frantically searching the area, like you didn’t know where you were. Logan’s hands came up to your face, carefully holding it to try to ground you on him.

“Logan,” you breathed out, confused. “Oh my!” The flames suddenly disappeared. “What did I do?! What did I do?!”

“Hey, hey, hey, sweetheart,” Logan tried to remain as calm as possible. “You woke up. You stopped it.”

“Did I…?”

“I far as I know, no one is injured. Everyone got out safely.”

You nodded as much as his hands would allow it. Finally, you looked at him. Logan’s skin was healing the burns that you had caused. His clothes were burned through in various places, barely hanging on.

“Oh my…” Your hand moved to rest against his chest, but you never let it touch. Too scared to do anymore damage than you already had.

“I’m okay.”

“I hurt you.” Tears began to slip down your cheeks. You pulled yourself out of Logan’s hold, trembling as you got off the bed and backed yourself into the corner.

“I can handle it.” Logan stood up but didn’t get any closer.

You looked at your room. The room was black, practically burnt to a crisp. Your arms wrapped around you as you slid down to the floor.

“I’m so sorry,” you cried. “I didn’t mean to.”

“No one is mad at you,” Logan said, coming around the bed to kneel in front of you. “Was it a nightmare?”

“Mhm,” you nodded. “It was a mixture of everything bad in my life… it was so overwhelming.”

“Y/N!” Ororo said, rushing in. “You’re okay!”

“I’m fine, Ororo. How is everyone else?”

“Everyone got out safely. Scott and the Professor are figuring out what to do right now.”

~~~

Charles had to buy out every able room at the nearby hotel. You refused to choose a room, saying it was too dangerous. Logan wouldn’t have you sleeping outside so he dragged you into his room. You looked around, noting that there was only one bed in the room.

“I’ll sleep on the floor,” Logan immediately offered.

“No, you own’t need to,” you responded with a shake of your head. “Sleep on the bed. I should probably sleep in the tub, just in case.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I need to make sure I don’t burn the place down. The tub will allow you to put me out quickly if a fire starts.”

“You’re not sleeping in the tub. Get on the damn bed, sweetheart.”

“Logan—“

“This is not an argument you’re going to win, darlin’. Bed. Now.”

You hated how aroused you were at his dominance. And, knowing Logan well, you knew he could smell it. You crawled onto the bed and slipped into it before patting the space next to you.

“Please don’t sleep on the floor,” you quietly requested. “If id on’t have a choice, you don’t either.”

Logan slid in beside you, keeping a respectful distance. You hated that the mere inches between you felt like miles.

“Goodnight, Logan,” you whispered.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

~~~

The bed felt different when you woke up. Warmer. Firmer. Opening your eyes, you noticed at you were practically on top of Logan. He was sleeping soundly. You allowed yourself to study his face. How he seemed so at peace. How his wrinkles were smoothed out. You didn’t realize how much you loved his wrinkles until now. You began to realize how you also felt more at peace while being next to Logan like this. It had been far too long since you had this feeling. You could tell that tears were threatening to spill. So before you cried on top of Logan, you out off the bed and slipped out of the room.

Logan’s heart dropped when he woke up and couldn’t feel you next to him. He snapped up, quickly looking around for you. He knew he should have done something to lock you into this room—to the bed. If you slept outside or in the tub, he wasn’t going to be happy. Looking at the window, Logan could see your shadow through the thin curtain.

Quietly, Logan came out of the room. If you noticed him, you didn’t say anything. You were turned away from him, staring down where the hotel pool was. Logan couldn’t help himself, it was like a habit, as he walked towards you and wrapped his arms around you. You immediately leaned back into him. His brows creased together when he realized that you were crying. He pulled you back into the room, never letting you go.

“What’s wrong?” He asked softly.

“I’m sorry,” you cried. He turned your around, allowing you to cry into his chest as he held you.

“For what?”

“For missing you… even though you’re right here.”

Logan’s heart dropped. This had been the first time you had admitted any of your struggles. It was also the struggle he didn’t know if you’d ever admit to him. Logan quickly hugged you tighter and kissed your head. He let you cry into his chest as he held you close. Logan needed to find a way to get his memories back. Not for him. But for you.

Chapter Text

Your nightmare fueled flames had done more damage to the building than anyone had thought. The whole school was forced to live in the hotel for a month. Though, the parents who were willing did come and get their children quickly. You couldn’t help but feel terrible about the whole situation, despite what others had tried to tell you.

Logan and you continued to share a room and a bed. You always started out on different sides of the bed only to wake up cuddled together. Neither of you said anything of it.

You busied yourself throughout every day with caring for the students there at the hotel. Logan busied himself with keeping an eye out on you. He didn’t want to tell you that you had been catching items on fire in your sleep. Or been crying out and thrashing around. Logan had become a master at not waking you while he put the flames out or holding you tightly so that you weren’t able to hurt yourself. He knew that there was more going on in your mind than you had yet to admit and he hated it. So for now, Logan would have to be content to doing what he could.

Finally, it was the last night in the hotel. But you and Logan seemed to be the only ones on edge about it.

It would be the last time you shared a bed with him. And it killed you to even think about. You sat on the bed, staring at Logan as he brushed his teeth. He caught your eye in the mirror and quickly spit out the tooth paste.

“What’s going on?” He asked turning around.

“Nothing,” you said, shaking your head.

“You don’t gotta do that.”

“Do what?”

“Lie to me. Act that you’re protecting me or some shit. I can handle whatever you’re thinking.” You looked down at your lap. Logan sighed, coming over and sitting in front of you on the bed. “Talk to me.”

“I’m… overwhelmed…” Logan stayed silent at your admission, letting you continue. “I was tortured. My free will stripped from me by the man who rescued me from homelessness and ruined our lives.”

“Homelessness?”

You sighed. You had forgotten that Logan didn’t know—or remember—your story. “I was homeless because of my father. He killed my mother for being a mutant. He was going to kill me too… I didn’t know about my mutation until that night.”

It was then that Logan realized that you had told him everything you knew about his past and the past you shared, but nothing about your individual past. “How old were you?”

“Early teens. I was in my late thirties when Stryker found me on the streets… before I killed him, he tried to appeal to me. Tried to remind me that I wouldn’t be where I am today without him… it’s the truth. For better or worse… the thing is, is that he called you the animal but I’m the one that ended up killing him.”

“He was an evil man.”

“I’ve learned that that doesn’t always justify actions. You could’ve killed him too and didn’t.”

“I didn’t because you were standing there. If you hadn’t been, it would have been a whole different story.“ You stayed silent. He moved closer to you. “What else is bothering you?”

“A lot,” you mumbled.

“Tell me.”

“I… I don’t wanna be a burden.”

“You never could be, sweetheart. Not to me.”

You could have melted right then and there. If you only knew how much Logan truly meant that. How much he was doing for you without your knowledge, that he never intended to tell you about.

You opened up to Logan that night. About everything. Your past before meeting him, what happened after Charles found you. Your overwhelming emotions about recent events. Logan listened intently, giving comments and light touches when necessary but mostly just there.

“Thank you,” you told him after everything had been said. You were lying in the bed, ready to fall asleep.

“Nothing to thank,” he responded, leaning over and kissing your forehead. “Get some sleep.”

Your brain was too tired to comprehend anything you were saying anymore, but you still spoke. “I’m going to miss this… time with you.”

Logan’s brows furrowed. “What do ya mean?”

“It’s been different… it’s been good… like before…” You fell asleep almost as soon as the words left your mouth.

Logan’s lips pulled up into a small smile. He finished getting ready and slipped into bed. Tonight, he didn’t wait until your nightmare to pull you closer. Logan wanted to keep you next to him all night.

~~~

“Professor—“

“No.”

Logan halted near the entrance of Charles’ office. “You don’t even know—“

“I am telepathic, Logan, and your thoughts have been growing louder for weeks.”

“I need you to try to held me remember.”

“Logan, I told you—“

“I know what you said but I have to try something. Y/N is trying to put on a brace face but it’s hurting me to see how badly she’s hurting.”

“It could kill you or it may reveal something you didn’t want to remember. It could even make you lose everything again.”

“I don’t care. I have to try something.”

Charles studied Logan for a moment before sighing. It was clear that Logan was determined to do this and Charles would rather be the one to do it than Logan finding someone else who would.

“I will do it,” Charles agreed. “But I will stop if it gets too much, no matter if it’s working or not.”

~~~

Logan found you in your classroom, prepping for the week ahead. You smiled when you saw him come in.

“Hey, Lo,” you greeted. “What brings you around?”

“Need a favor, sweetheart,” he answered.

Your head tilted slightly to the side. Logan wasn’t one to ask for things, so this intrigued you. “What is it?”

He pulled a crinkled paper out of his jean pocket and handed it to you. “I need you to go to the store for me.”

You took the paper from him. “What? Are you serious? Why can’t you go yourself?”

“The Professor needs my help with a project.”

“A project?”

“Yes.”

“And you can’t go after?”

“Don’t know how long it’ll take.”

You sighed. “Fine.”

He shot you a smile. “Thanks, sweetheart.”

“You owe me.”

“Of course.”

~~~

Charles and Logan went down to the lab as soon as you were clear of the mansion. Colossus’s and Scott went down to help if needed. Logan was secured to the table as best as he could be, just in case something happened.

Rogue and Bobby were upstairs, put in charge of making sure you didn’t come down if you arrived home early. Though, Ororo had decided to come along with you and make sure you take your time. But you could tell that something was up because each time you had everything from Logan’s list in your cart, one of the items would disappear.

“Ororo,” you were irritated.

“What?” She replied, faux innocence.

“Stop taking things from the cart. I want to go home.”

“I wasn’t—“

“I will light you on fire so fast. I’m serious.”

You didn’t let Ororo get near the driver’s side of the car, already wary that Ororo would somehow get you lost on the way home. Rogue and Bobby were there at the door to meet you.

“Let me take those,” Bobby said, swiping the bags from your arms.

“Thanks?” You were growing more confused.

“Y/N! Bobby is going to take me out tonight and I need help choosing an outfit,” Rogue said, slipping her gloved arm through yours.

“I don’t know—“

“It’ll be fun.”

She began pulling you up the stairs. You were about half way up when you heard a scream.

“James,” you breathed out. You pulled your arm out of Rogue’s hold and turned around. Ororo and Bobby were standing at the bottom of the stairs. “Move.”

“We can’t do that,” Bobby said.

“Why not?”

“Logan asked—“

“Logan asked what?” Suddenly, it all made sense. The whole day. “Why did Logan need you guys to distract me?” Another loud scream echoed through the halls. “What is going on?”

Ororo sighed. “He asked Charles to try and help him regain his memories,” she told you.

“What? I need to get down there!” You rushed down the stairs, only for Ororo and Bobby to move to block you further. “He could make it worse!”

“Y/N—“

“Move, Ororo, or I will burn this place down to get to him.”

Ororo and Bobby shared a look before they stepped aside. You ran down to the lower levels, with the others close behind. As soon as the doors opened to the lab, you came to a screeching halt. Logan was screaming and struggling against the holds on the table while Charles was at his head, holding it between his hands with his eyes closed in concentration.

“Stop it!” You yelled. “Stop it now!”

“If I stop now, it could make it worse,” Charles stated calmly. You came to Logan’s side and reached out to him. “Don’t touch him.”

You pulled your hand back and leaned closer to Logan. “I’m right here, Logan. I’m here.”

He screamed out in pain, his claws releasing from his knuckles. Tears filled your eyes, hating to see Logan in any pain. You stood by, watching, until Logan eventually passed out. Everyone slowly filed out of the room beside you and Charles. Charles opened his eyes and pulled his hands away from Logan’s head.

“Did it work?” You whispered.

“We won’t know until he wakes,” Charles answered before rolling out of the room.

You set your hand on top of one of Logan’s, brushing it lightly until the claws slipped back into him.

“Wolverine,” Logan mumbled.

“Logan?” You called, trying to coax him awake more.

“Wolverine,” he repeated, slowly opening your eyes. “You told me that story about Coo Coo Ca Choo… it’s the reason I chose the name Wolverine. Do you remember that story?”

You let out a watery chuckle as tears fell. “Do I remember? Of course, I do.”

“You’re the moon and I’m your Wolverine… I’ve got to bring you more flowers.” With barely any use of strength, Logan sat up, breaking the restraints. His hands came up to gently hold your face.

Your hands came up to hold onto his wrists. “Do you remember anything else?”

He thought for a moment. There were still missing pieces to his memories, but a lot of you were there. “Just the important stuff, baby.”

“Why did you do that? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I had to do something… I hate seeing you hurt.”

“You did it for me?”

“I would do anything for you, sweetheart. Whatever you need.”

Chapter Text

Logan couldn’t take his hands off you as the two of you sat in the lab. He was telling you everything he remembered. There were still gaps, but it made you happy to see him excited to remember past events. Especially your relationship.

“You were always in there, sweetheart,” he told you as his energy whined down. “It’s why I was always so drawn to you. Why I seemed to care so much even though I couldn’t fully understand it.”

“I’m so happy for you, Logan.”

“I know that we still can’t continue where we left off. So, would ya go on a date with me tonight?”

You couldn’t help but smile at him. “I’d love to.”

He smiled back at you. “I’ll swing by your room at 7.” He leaned in and kissed your head. “Be ready.”

~~~

You were so anxious. Like a teenager going on their first date with the person they have a major crush on. Every piece of clothing you touched, trying to figure out what to wear, ended up in flames. It had been far too long since you had lost control of your powers like this, and it was only increasing your anxiety. Due to your anxiousness, you ended up slipping a body suit on that Hank had made you that would help prevent you from burning anymore clothing. You finally found an outfit that would work with the body suit and tried not to burn a hole through the floor as you paced while you waited.

The moment you heard the knock, you froze. You stared at the door, unable to get yourself to move enough to answer it.

Logan was rocking on his heels on the other side of the door. His hands were trembling with nerves, the bouquet in one of his hands threatening to fall to the ground. He could hear you come to a halt in your room and your frantic heart.

“Y/N?” He called, beginning to grow worried. “Are you all right in there?”

“Yeah,” you cleared your throat. “I’m fine.”

“Then, uh, sweetheart, are you going to open the door?”

“Oh!” You rushed over and opened the door.

Logan’s eyes immediately raked over you while you stood there awkwardly watching him. You were beautiful to Logan; even when he didn’t remember you, he knew you were beautiful.

“Uh, these are for you,” he handed you the bouquet.

You took them and placed them against your nose, breathing them in. “I love them. Thank you.”

“You ready?”

“Hold on.” You turned and set the flowers on your desk before heading out of the room. “Now I’m ready.”

Logan glanced down at your hands before stuffing his into his leather jacket. He wanted to take your hand but didn’t know if it was the right time yet. The two of you started walking towards the garage.

“So, where are we headed?” You wondered.

“Not telling ya,” he replied with a small smirk. “You’re gonna have to wait and see.”

Upon entering the garage, you saw Scott’s bike with a helmet resting on its seat. You followed Logan over to the bike.

“Does Scott know that you’re stealing his bike again?” You teased.

Logan shrugged. “Don’t know. Don’t care.”

He picked up the helmet and turned around. Before you could say anything, he was already placing the helmet on your head and fastening it under your chin. Every movement he made was careful and gentle, like any wrong move and you could break into a million pieces.

“Am not fragile, you know?” You whispered, gazing at him.

“I know,” he replied softly. “But I can’t take any more chances with you…” His hand rested against your cheek, thumb brushing your warm skin. “We’ve already lost too much time.”

Your brain wouldn’t allow you to be vocal, so you nodded in response. Logan moved his hand to the small of your back and pushed you closer to the motorcycle. He got on first before glancing back to make sure you got on. Once you were sitting, you wrapped your arms around Logan’s center and breathed him in. His smell was always your favorite: earthy, cigar, and completely Logan.

Logan inhaled sharply when your arms secured around him. He could only hope that you couldn’t feel his heart thumping wildly in his chest as your closeness. He knew that this wasn’t the first time you two had been this close, but it was different today.

Once Logan was sure you were ready, he started the motorcycle, and the two of you were off. You rested your head against Logan’s back as he drove the two of you away from the mansion. You allowed yourself to relax, closing your eyes, and trusting in Logan to take you somewhere that you’ll both enjoy.

It wasn’t too long later that Logan pulled into an old bar parking lot. You got off first, taking your helmet off as Logan slipped off the bike.

“I know it’s not much,” he muttered, clearly nervous. “But I wanted someplace that was more private.”

You kissed his cheek as you slipped an arm through his. “I’m sure it’s perfect,” you told him.

Logan nodded, leading you into the bar. You looked around at the dimly lit place. It was pretty clean, with quiet country music playing on the speakers. There was an old bartender behind the counter, with a kitchen behind that in which you could hear noise coming from. There were two other patrons in the place, one at the bar and one at a booth, both nursing their own drinks. Logan guided you over to a quiet corner booth. You slipped in on one side while Logan sat on the other.

The bartender came over with two small menus, and the two of you quickly ordered some food and drinks. Silence fell between the two of you. Both of you had shared a lot of your stories in the past few months, even today when Logan woke and needed to tell you everything he remembered. Now, the two of you seemed to be out of words.

“Here you two go,” the bartender said, setting down your food and drinks.

“Thanks,” you gave him a small smile.

The bartender studied the two of you for a second. “First date?”

“Something like that,” Logan muttered.

The bartender stayed silent, nodding before leaving the two of you alone. The two of you begin to eat in silence, each of you stealing glances at the other when you thought the other wasn’t looking. A nice, slow love song came over the speakers, and you perked up.

“I love this song,” you mumbled with a smile.

Logan watched as you closed your eyes and began to hum to the song. He stood up and suddenly took your hand, pulling you up. Your eyes snapped open in surprise as you stumbled onto your feet.

“What are you doing?” You asked as one of his hands took yours and the other went around to the small of your back. He pulled you against him.

“Dancing,” he mumbled.

“You don’t dance.” Your other hand found Logan’s shoulder, wrapping around his neck.

“Maybe I do now.”

Logan began to lead you around in a small circle. You rested your head on him and let him have complete control. You could feel the tension leave Logan’s body the longer he held you close. It didn’t take long for Logan to guide the hand of yours he was holding to his neck so that he could put both of his hands on your back. His head came down and rested on top of yours. The two of you stayed like that through the song and into the next.

Suddenly, you stopped and looked at him. He couldn’t gauge what you were thinking, making his brows pinched together.

“What is—“

You cut him off with a quick peck on his lips. “Sorry. I got caught in—“

It was Logan’s turn to cut you off. His hands took hold of your face as he let his lips gently glide against yours. The kiss was tender and sweet, with no fighting for dominance or tense passion. It felt like pieces of your and Logan’s souls were falling back into place after an eternity apart. When the kiss broke, Logan’s forehead rested against yours, his hands still carefully holding your face. Your hands came up to grip his wrists. Your eyes remained closed as you let yourself savor the moment.

“Can I take you back to the mansion?” Logan asked, almost like he was nervous.

“Mhm,” you hummed with a nod.

You had to hold back a whine as Logan let you go to throw some money on the table. His lips perked up as he noticed your body try to follow his when he let you go. Logan took your hand, leading you out of the bar and to the motorcycle. He again helped you with the helmet and the two of you were quickly off.

~~~

Your hand held tightly to Logan’s as you pulled him into your room. Logan made sure to shut the door and lock it behind him before he pulled you in for a searing kiss. You leaned into it and allowed him to take the lead. Neither of you wanted to push the other’s boundaries, careful of each movement you made. Logan’s hands moved to your waist while yours went to his neck. One of his hands slipped under your shirt, only for him not to feel your skin but an odd texture. He pulled back from your lips with concern.

“What are you wearing underneath your shirt?” He asked.

You grew embarrassed and hid your head in his chest. “I kept burning my clothes,” you grumbled.

“What?” He laughed.

“I was so nervous that I kept setting everything on fire so I had to slip my bodysuit on under my clothes.”

“So you have a whole bodysuit on underneath your clothes?”

“Yes.”

“Sexy.”

You laughed, playfully smacking his chest. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not,” he chuckled with a shake of his head. “I’m glad to hear that you were nervous. I was, too.”

“Yeah?”

“Sweetheart, I bought three bouquets of flowers. Thankfully, I did because I destroyed two of them on accident before I could get out of my room.”

“That makes me feel so much better,” you giggled.

Logan wrapped his arms around you. “I wanted to make sure we’re on the same page with tonight. How far do you want this to go?”

You thought about it. The two of you had talked about going slow, starting at the beginning. But what did that really look like for the two of you?

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Logan quickly added. “I’m good with going at your speed.”

“I… I’m good to continue where we left off.”

“Like the making out?”

“Like the sex.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m not willing to do anything crazy, but… let’s see what happens. See where it goes.”

“And you’re sure?”

“James,” you took his chin to make sure he was looking into your eyes. “I’m sure.”

~~~

What happened that night was completely surrounded in love, though that word was never said. The two of you allowed yourselves to follow what your bodies were begging for, which was each other. Eventually, the two of you ended up naked and asleep, cuddled next to each other. While you were asleep, Logan was studying every inch of your body that he could see. His fingers gently brushed over some of your many scars. A few of them made his heart clench as they were similarly aligned to his claws. As Logan continued to brush over your scars, you slowly woke.

“What’s wrong?” You groggily said.

“Nothing,” he answered. “Go back to sleep.”

You looked to see where his hand was, running over a scar. You sighed before looking back up at him. “Talk to me.”

“Did I… I know I caused the ones on your chest from the Statue of Liberty, but… Did I cause these others?”

“Logan, don’t do this.”

“Please, tell me.”

You sighed, really not wanting to have this conversation. “Yes, but you didn’t mean to inflict a single one of these, okay? Do not feel overwhelmed with guilt.”

“But I—“

“No. I healed, I’m fine.”

“You scar…”

“Every scar reminds me of how strong I am.”

“I just don’t like the idea of being able to hurt you.”

“I can hurt you too. You may not scar, but I can do some damage and I have in the past.”

Logan simply nodded, still staring at your scars. You took his hand and brought it up to your face. Logan gasped, trying to pull away as your lips kissed between his knuckles where his claws came out. You held tight, moving to kiss the next spot and then the next. Logan watched in awe as you did that with both of his hands.

“Release your claws,” you requested softly.

“No,” Logan quickly responded, shaking your head.

“James.”

Your tone left no room for argument. Slowly, Logan let his claws slide out of his knuckles. You sat up to get a better grasp on his wrists.

“I used to kiss your claws on the time,” you whispered. “Do you remember?”

“Vaguely,” he mumbled, watching you carefully.

“That’s okay. I haven’t kissed these claws yet anyway.”

Logan held his breath as he watched you kiss each of his adamantium claws. You were so gentle and careful with his claws and your movements. Logan was in complete awe of you. You were truly amazing. Once you were done showing his claws some love, you still kept his wrists in your hands.

“Your claws are amazing, Logan,” you told him. “They are defenders—protectors. And I love them.”

“You’re amazing, darlin’,” he whispered, still in complete awe.

You leaned in and gave him a soft kiss. “Can we go back to sleep now?”

He chuckled, pulling you down and into him. “Sure, sweetheart. We can sleep as long as you want.”

Chapter Text

Though Logan didn’t get every memory back, his nightmares began to show him pieces of wars from long ago. Despite his insistence for your safety, you continued to sleep beside him. It amazed Logan how you seemed to be so prepared for his nightmares. Each time he woke with his claws out, you were already a safe distance away, trying to coax him out of it.

Logan had basically moved into your room now, which let you be available to teasing from many students and faculty. It didn’t matter to either of you though, just that you were together.

It had now been four months since the events of Alkali Lake. You were currently in the Danger Room running a simulation with Storm, Rogue, Ice Man, Kitty, Colossus, and Logan. The students were running around, trying to avoid being shot at by a large robot with Storm flying around. Logan was barely doing anything, not happy to have to be subbing for Scott once again. He found you taking cover behind a car and tried to use the flames on top of the car to light his cigar.

“We’re getting killed out here,” you stated.

“Yeah, I know,” Logan replied. “They’re not ready, Y/N.”

You noticed that the robot was behind you. “Logan.”

“Oh, don’t get your panties in a bunch.” You launched yourself at Logan, forcing the two of you to tumble away before you could get stepped on. “That was my last cigar.”

“Really?”

“It’s getting closer!” Rogue exclaimed.

“Come on!” You encouraged. “Let’s keep moving!”

“Hey, Tin Man! Come here!” Logan called to Colossus, who listened. “How’s your throwing arm?” He released his claws.

“Logan, we work as a team.”

“Yeah, good luck with that. Throw me. Now!”

“Damn it, Logan! Don’t do this!”

Colossus threw Logan up to the robot, with Logan and the head quickly falling back to the ground. Logan stood up and walked around the head.

“Class dismissed,” he stated. You shook your head, heading towards the doors as the simulation disappeared. “Hey, Colossus, nice throw.”

“What the hell was that?” You were clearly angry as Logan came to walk beside you, the students trailing after you with Storm remaining in the simulation room.

“Danger Room session.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Oh, lighten up, Y/N.”

You stopped, turning to him. “You can’t just change the rules when you feel like it. I’m trying to teach them something!”

“I taught ‘em something.”

“It was a defensive exercise.”

“Yeah. Best defense is a good offense. Or is it the other way around?”

“This isn’t a game, Logan.”

“Well, you sure fooled me.”

“Logan—“

“Hey,” he raised his hands in innocence, “I’m just a sub. You got a problem, talk to Scott.”

“Mom and Dad are fighting,” Bobby muttered, causing Rogue and Kitty to giggle.

“Watch it, bub,” Logan growled at the kid.

“Why don’t we let these two lovebirds work it out?” Ororo suggested, coming up to guide the students away.

You and Logan were left in the hall. You sighed, running a hand down your face. Logan began to feel guilty. He knew how hard you were working to train this group of students, running yourself to the ground to try to get them ready for whatever they may be needed for.

“Hey,” he called softly, stepping closer to you. “I’m sorry, ‘kay?” His hands ran down your arms until they could connect with your hands. “I shouldn’t have messed with the simulation.”

“I just wish that you would try a little bit to work as a team,” you admitted. “Even if that means you’re in the simulation just to make sure I’m safe… can you do that?”

“I’ll try,” he nodded. “For you.” He kissed your forehead. You leaned into him further, allowing him to wrap his arms around you. “What else can do for you, sweetheart?”

“Nothing,” you mumbled.

“Ya sure? I know you’ve been a bit stressed.”

“I’m fine.” You leaned back to make sure you could look him in the eye. “I promise.”

“I ain’t buying it, darlin’, not for one second.”

You leaned in, kissing him softly to try to ease his worry. “I’m fine,” you repeated upon pulling away. You knew he still didn’t believe you. “Let’s go upstairs.”

Logan nodded, slipping your hand into his and leading you upstairs. When you reached the main floor, Scott was rushing down the stairs with a backpack slung over his shoulder.

“Hey, Scott,” Logan called, “they were lookin’ for you downstairs. You didn’t show.”

“Logan,” you tried to get him to drop it.

“What do you care?” Scott argued.

“Well, for starters, I had to cover your ass,” Logan responded.

“I didn’t ask you to.”

“No, you didn’t. Y/N and the Professor did.”

“Scott, please stop closing us off,” you pled.

“I know how you feel,” Logan continued, ignoring you.

“Don’t,” Scott said.

“When Y/N—“

“I said don’t.”

“Maybe it’s time to move on.”

“Not everybody heals as fast as you, Logan.”

“Scott!” You called after him as he stormed off. You tried to follow him, but Logan stopped you.

“Let him go,” he told you.

“I’m so worried about him, Logan.”

“I know, but you can’t help him right now.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that once you start being honest with the fact that something is going on with you, then you can help Scott.”

You clenched your jaw, annoyed at Logan. But you knew that he had a point. You had been struggling with a feeling that something was coming on the horizon. You didn’t want to worry Logan, so you hadn’t said anything. Clearly, Logan was more in tune with you than you thought.

“I’m going to go change and get ready for my next class,” you said, pulling away from Logan.

“Y/N…” He tried to grab your wrist, but you hurried up the stairs. He shook his head, growing frustrated that you were pulling away from him.

~~~

Charles summoned you to his office, where he and Ororo were already. As soon as you arrived, a large smile took over your face.

“Hank!” You exclaimed upon seeing his blue hair.

“Y/N!” He greeted you, meeting you for a hug.

“How are you?”

“I’m fine.” You could see that something more was going on. “Thank you all for seeing me on such short notice.”

“Henry, you are always welcome here,” Charles stated. “You’re a part of this place.”

“I have news.”

“Is it Erik?”

“No. Though we have been making some progress on that front. Mystique was recently apprehended.”

“Who’s the fur ball?” Logan asked, leaning against the office doorway.

“Hank McCoy, Secretary of Mutant Affairs.”

“Right, right.” Logan pushed off the doorway, hands stuffed in his pockets as he came over next to you. “The secretary. Nice suit.”

“Henry, this is Logan. He’s, uh—“

“Wolverine,” Hank interrupted Charles. “I hear you’re quite an animal.”

“Look who’s talkin’,” Logan commented.

“You know Magneto’s gonna come get Mystique, right?” You said.

“Magneto’s not the problem. At least not our most pressing one,” Hank said. “A major pharmaceutical company has developed a mutant antibody—a way to suppress the mutant ‘X’ gene.”

“Suppress?”

“Permanently. They’re calling it a cure.”

“Well, that’s ridiculous,” Ororo scoffed. “You can’t cure being a mutant.”

“Well, scientifically speaking—“

“Since when did we become a disease? How can anybody in their right—“

“Storm,” Charles stopped the woman. “They’re announcing it now.”

“Who would want this cure? I mean, what kind of coward would take it just to fit in?”

“Is it cowardice to save oneself from persecution?” Hank questioned. “Not all of us can fit in so easily. You don’t shed on the furniture.”

“Well, for all we know, the government helped cook this up,” Logan said, not trusting the thought of a cure.

“I can assure you the government had nothing to do with this.”

“Well, I’ve heard that before.”

“My boy, I have been fighting for mutant rights since before you had claws.”

You couldn’t hold back the laugh that escaped you. You quickly covered your mouth.

Logan looked at you, unamused, and pointed at Hank. “Did he just call me ‘boy’?” He asked.

“Is it true?” Rogue asked, rushing in. “They can sure us?”

“Yes, Rogue,” Charles responded. “It appears to be true.”

“No, Professor,” Ororo cut in, standing up. “They can’t cure us.” She walked over to Rogue. “You want to know why? Because there’s nothin’ to cure. Nothing’s wrong with you. Or any of us, for that matter.”

Ororo led Rogue out of the room. You took a seat on the couch with Hank, staring down at your hands. There was a cure out there. How was that going to affect the mutant community? The world?

~~~

Logan had been watching you carefully as you readied yourself for bed. You had been quiet since Hank came with the news about the cure, but he hadn’t wanted to push you to talk if you weren’t ready. Now, he was growing concerned about your silence and the topic of a cure.

“Would you ever take the cure?” Logan suddenly asked.

You stopped your movements in the bathroom and turned to see him leaning against the doorframe. “What? Why would you ask me that?”

“You’re quiet again. I’m worried.”

“It’s not about the cure. Well— yes, okay, it is. But not about me.”

“So you wouldn’t take it?”

“No,” you shook your head. “It’s never crossed my mind to be cured… I guess it’s because I’m one of the lucky ones. My mutation isn’t visible in ways that draw attention, and it doesn’t affect my everyday life… like Rogue. What about you?”

“It’s never crossed my mind. Besides, it would probably kill me if I took it. I’ve got mental grafted to my bones.”

You took the few steps necessary to allow you to wrap his arms around his waist. “Don’t ever take it… I don’t think I can handle losing you again.”

“I won’t ever do anything that will take me away from you.” He kissed your forehead. “I promise.”

You sighed, snuggling into him more. “I’m worried about what this cure will do to the mutants… I’m scared that the government will use it against us. They make it seem like we have a choice now, but what if one day they force it upon everyone?”

“I’ll protect you.”

“And I’ll protect you.” The both of you met for a kiss. It was slow and simple, but everything the two of you needed. When you two pulled apart, you couldn’t help the words that slipped from your lips. “I love you.”

Logan pulled back slightly. You were suddenly terrified that you had messed up. The two of you hadn’t said those words since before Logan lost his memories. What if he wasn’t ready? What if you just ruined your relationship?

Logan’s hands moved to gently hold your face. He could see that you were spiraling and needed to quickly fix it. “I love you, sweetheart.”

You broke out into a smile before practically jumping on top of him and pulling him into another kiss. Logan chuckled into the kiss, moving to hold you so that you wouldn’t slip. He began to move to your bed. He laid down on it, keeping you on top.

“I love you, sweetheart,” Logan repeated. “Let me show you just how much.”

~~~

Logan was wide awake, holding your sleeping form tightly against him. His mind wouldn’t let him rest, so now he was stuck in his own thoughts. He was worried about you and the cure and the nightmares he might encounter. You whined beside him, pulling his attention to you. The hand you had rested on his bare chest slowly began to warm until it was causing a burn.

“Jean,” you mumbled. “Jean.”

“Sweetheart,” he called, trying to guide you out of whatever dream you were having. “Wake up.”

All at once, flames appeared around the end of the bed.

“Jean! No!” You cried out.

Logan sat up, taking you with him. He began to gently shake you. “Honey, wake up.”

The flames grew, threatening to brush against the ceiling. Logan looked around, trying to see if there was a way for him to get off the bed without going through the flames. There wasn’t, so he would give you one more chance to wake before he would go through the flames to get what he needed to calm you and the flames. Logan moved you so that he could grip your shoulders and shake you a little harder.

“Y/N, baby, wake up!”

You gasped, trying to sit up, but Logan’s shoulders kept you down. The flames around the bed died, leaving the room with a smokey air. Your eyes frantically searched the area for danger.

“Honey,” Logan called. His hands moved to your face to try to focus you. “You’re here. I’m here. You’re safe.”

“Jean…” you rasped.

“What about Jean?”

“She died. But I…”

“But what?”

“I could feel her. Inside my brain. Like she was alive.”

“Jean’s gone.”

“It was so real.” Tears welled up in your eyes. “She was in there… controlling my mind.”

Logan nodded. He could tell that you believed that Jean had been inside your mind, and you weren’t one to joke about something like that. But it wasn’t possible. Jean died months ago. Her body was never found in Alkali Lake despite the team’s best efforts. It had broken you to never have a body to bury, no matter how hard you tried to pull off as strong. Jean had been a sister and your best friend. A loss like that wasn’t going to be easy to overcome. So Logan believed that this dream had to be a part of your grief. His thumbs gently rubbed against your cheeks as he continued to hold your head.

“I’m sorry, darlin’,” was all Logan could pull together to say.

“I miss her,” the emotions began choking you up.

“I know, sweetheart.” He moved his hands to pull you into him, holding you to his chest before he laid down with you on top of him. “I miss her too.”

Logan held you as you cried about Jean. Eventually, the cries died out, and Logan could tell that you were exhausted.

“Did I… did I almost burn down the room again?” You whispered against him.

“You stopped,” he answered. “Don’t worry about it.”

Too tired to move much, you kissed his chest. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

“Always, baby.”

Chapter Text

The next morning began as a regular morning. You and Logan got ready for the day and kissed each other goodbye before you went to teach your class, and Logan stayed by himself. You were in between classes when Charles’ voice rang out in everyone’s heads.

“Scott. Scott. Scott. Scott.”

You quickly ran down the hall, Ororo joining you, towards Charles’ office. Logan ran down the stairs, joining the two of you.

“What happened?” Ororo asked.

“No clue!” Logan answered.

The three of you burst into Charles’ office. He was in his wheelchair facing the window. He turned his head at your intrusion.

“Professor, you okay?” Logan asked.

“Get to Alkali Lake,” he responded.

The three of you didn’t waste a second. You and Ororo changed into your suits while Logan opted for his leather jacket. The jet was tense, with all three of you on edge. You and Ororo ended up flying the jet, with Logan standing behind you, a hand on your shoulder.

A dense fog covered Alkali Lake. You had to carefully land the jet in the fog. When you walked down the stairs out of the jet, you couldn’t see anything through the fog. Logan slipped his hand through yours once you two were on the ground.

“You don’t want to be here,” you stated.

“Do you?” Logan replied. You, Logan, and Ororo started walking forward. The whole area was extremely eerie. “I can’t see a damn thing.”

“I can take care of that,” Ororo said. She used her powers to clear the fog, revealing rocks floating in the air all around you.

“What the…” you breathed out.

Logan’s free hand came up and pushed one of the rocks away. Ororo began to walk around while you and Logan walked forward. Logan’s grip on your hand tightened as his nerves grew. You suddenly stopped and gasped. Logan’s focus immediately shifted to you, though your eyes were locked on something ahead of you.

“What is it?” Logan wondered, clearly concerned.

“Scott,” you said, growing emotionally.

Logan’s head snapped in the direction you were looking. There, floating in the air, were Scott’s protective glasses. His face dropped as he took the glasses in his hand.

“Logan! Y/N!” Ororo screamed.

The two of you hurried over. You stumbled to a stop when you saw Jean’s body laid out on the rocks next to the water. Logan’s hand ripped from yours as he went and knelt beside Jean and Ororo.

“She’s alive,” Ororo stated.

“Jean?” You questioned, in complete shock.

Logan didn’t waste another second before scoping Jean up and carrying her back to the jet. Ororo was close behind, with you still frozen in your spot. Jean was alive. How? And where was Scott? You had felt Jean in your mind. Was that real? A hand brushing against your back caused you to jump away from the touch, flames burning from your fingertips.

“It’s just me, sweetheart,” Logan said, hand slightly up in defense.

You nodded, calming your flames down and going back to stare at the spot where Jean’s body was. Logan took cautious steps to you, making sure not to touch you right now.

“Come on,” he urged softly. “We need to get back so that the Professor can check Jean out.”

Without a word, you walked back to the jet. Logan sighed, following you closely. You found yourself sitting next to the stretcher that Jean was laid out on. Logan sat with Ororo at the front, leaving you to be alone with Jean.

The ride back to the mansion was completely silent, and before you knew it, you were down in the lab with Charles examining Jean’s brain.

“The sheer mass of water that collapsed on top of Jean should have obliterated her completely,” Charles explained. “The only explanation of Jean’s survival is that her powers wrapped her in a cocoon of telekinetic energy."

“Is she gonna be okay?” Logan wondered.

“Jean Grey is the only class five mutant I’ve ever encountered, her potential practically limitless. Her mutation is seated in the unconscious part of her mind, and therein lay the danger. When she was a girl, I created a series of psychic barriers to isolate her powers from her conscious mind. And, as a result, Jean developed a dual personality.”

“What?”

“The conscious Jean, whose powers were always in her control, and the dormant side, a personality that, in our sessions, came to call itself the Phoenix—-a purely instinctual creature, all desire and joy and rage.”

“She knew all this?”

“It’s unclear how much she knew.”

Logan turned to you. “Did you know about this?”

“Yes,” you responded quietly. He was clearly growing upset.

“Far more critical is whether the woman in front of us is the Jean Grey wet now or the Phoenix furiously struggling to be free,” Charles said.

“She looks pretty peaceful to me,” Logan noted.

“Because I’m keeping her that way. I’m trying to restore the psychic blocks and cage the beast again.”

“What have you done to her?”

Logan’s tone made you flinch. Your arms wrapped around you, trying to comfort yourself while you watch Logan fall apart over Jean. You had been so sure about him choosing you that Jean was never really an option. Was that all a lie you told yourself?

“Logan, you have to understand—“

“You’re talkin’ about a person’s mind here,” Logan interrupted Charles’ explanation, “about Jean.”

“She has to be controlled.”

“Control? You know, sometimes when you cage the beast, the beast gets angry.”

“You have no idea. You have no idea of what she’s capable of.”

“No, Professor. I had no idea what you were capable of.” Logan looked back at you. “And you’re okay with this?”

“I—“

“This is a terrible choice I have to make,” Charles cut you off, trying to take Logan’s anger away from you. “I chose the lesser of two evils.”

“Well, it sounds to me like Jean had no choice at all,” Logan retorted.

“I don’t have to explain myself, least of all to you.”

“You’re really going to let him play with Jean’s mind, Y/N?”

“It’s for the best,” you told him, trying to remain calm.

Logan scoffed. “Seriously? Does he have you brainwashed, too?”

You clenched your jaw, standing there for a moment, before rushing out of the room. You couldn’t deal with this right now.

Logan reached out his hand to stop you, but he wasn’t able to get any more words out. This wasn’t about you. His anger shouldn’t have been aimed at you. Logan was concerned about Jean and what may have happened to Scott. He also hated the idea of Charles playing with Jean’s mind—Jean’s memories. It was due to his own past, and deep down he understood that Charles would never do something without great reason.

But, most importantly, Logan was worried about you. You had admitted to feeling Jean in your mind last night, and he had pushed it aside. What would have happened if Logan had listened to you? Would Scott be here? Would Jean be completely okay and awake? And how exactly were you feeling about all this?

With determined steps, Logan exited the lab and went in search of you. But you seemed to have disappeared. You weren’t in the Danger Room, any classrooms, or a bedroom. He began to wander the gardens, still with no sight of you. Logan was growing more and more concerned about where you could be and how you were.

“Have you seen Y/N?” He asked Ororo upon running into her back in the school.

She shook her head. “Not since I left the lab,” she replied. “Why? What’s going on?”

“I can’t find her anywhere.”

“Maybe you’re just missing her. Perhaps she’s back in the lab with Jean.”

Logan nodded, turning around to head back down there. If he couldn’t find you there, he was going to ask Charles to use Cerebro to look for you. It didn’t make any sense. How could you have disappeared?

In the lab, Jean was lying there alone, a new device on her head to track her brain waves. Walking closer, Logan went to check on her. He reached out to touch her only for Jean’s hand to quickly grab his wrist. The device over her head moved as she opened her eyes.

“Jean,” Logan said.

Jean looked at Logan. “Hey, Logan,” she whispered.

“Welcome back.”

She let his wrist go, glancing around the room. “Back where we first met. Only I was in your place, and you were in mine.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah… More than okay.” Logan watched as she pulled off the monitors. It wasn’t in any sexual manner; he was just watching her movements. “Logan, you’re making me blush.”

“I wasn’t—“

“Don’t worry, I don’t have to read your thoughts to know what you’re thinking.”

“Jean, I wasn’t—“

“It’s okay.”

Jean sat up. Her legs moved so that Logan was standing between them. Logan knew that this wasn’t right. He didn’t care for Jean like she was making it seem, but he suddenly felt like he had no control over his body. He couldn’t move and something was convincing him that he didn’t want to.

Jean slowly leaned closer until her lips brushed against Logan’s. She grabbed his head forcefully when he tried to pull away, using her powers to keep him there. Her legs wrapped around his waist as she pulled down his shirt, all while still forcing her kiss upon him. The screens and machines in the lab began to change as Jean’s power grew outward.

Logan’s mind was fighting an inner battle. There was the part of the brain that he still had control over. The one that was screaming at him to throw Jean away. But Jean was creeping in from the other side of the brain, the part she was already in control of.

Jean used her powers to pull Logan down and onto the stretcher, making sure he was on top of her. She scratched down his shoulders, causing large gashes. Logan pulled away, moaning at the feeling. Jean quickly brought his head down for another heated kiss.

~~~

You had run off down to the nearby store for some alcohol. You knew that you and Logan would need it, and you needed some time away to try and clear your mind. Figuring that Logan was still in the lab with Jean, you headed straight down there with your 6-pack of beer. But as soon as the lab doors opened, your world shifted.

There Logan was, on top of the stretcher, heavily making out with Jean. The 6-pack went crashing to the floor, shattering everywhere. Logan and Jean jumped, both looking in your direction. Logan’s mind suddenly cleared, and he jumped off the stretcher.

“Y/N, it’s not—“

But you wouldn’t listen to Logan. You covered your mouth as the sobs began and ran out of the lab. Logan tried to follow after you, but Jean wasn’t allowing him to leave.

“Let me go,” Logan growled as Jean forced him to turn to face her. “Jean, this isn’t you.”

“Yes. Yes, it is me,” she replied, kissing him again.

“No,” he pulled his head away, fighting harder against her control. “Maybe you ought to take it easy, huh? The Professor said you might be different.”

“He would know, wouldn’t he?”

“What?”

“You think he’s not in your head, too? Look at you, Logan. He’s tamed you.”

“He’s not the one that’s tamed me, and you know that… where’s Scott?” Suddenly, Jean’s eyes shifted from being more black to her normal color and her face dropped. “Jean?”

“Where am I?” Her tone changed to soft and confused as she looked around the room.

“You’re in the mansion. You need to let me go and tell me what happened to Scott.” Pulling at her power, he got his hand to move to Scott’s glasses that were in his pocket. He pulled them out to show her. “Jean, tell me what happened to him.”

“Oh, God.” Her eyes closed, and the room began growing haywire.

“Look at me.” Logan placed his hands on either side of Jean’s face. “Jean, stay with me. Talk to me. Look at me. Look at me!”

“No!” Jean cried, tears running down her cheeks.

“Focus! Focus, Jean!”

“Kill me…”

“What?”

“Kill me before I kill someone else… before I hurt any more people.”

“Don’t say that.”

“Please.”

“Stop it.”

“Kill me.”

“It’ll be all right. We can help you. Okay? The Professor can help. He can fix it.”

Jean’s eyes suddenly changed to black, as did the veins in her face. “I don’t want to fix it!”

With her powers, she threw Logan across the lab. Logan hit the wall, knocking he out, before falling to the floor. Jean destroyed the lab door as she headed out.

“Logan!” Ororo ran into the lab, with Charles following.

“Jean?” He sat up. “Y/N!”

“What happened?”

“What have you done?”

“She got in my mind,” Logan explained, panting. “She forced me to— Y/N… she saw… I think Jean killed Scott.”

“What?” Ororo questioned. “That’s not possible.”

“I warned you,” Charles said before closing his eyes and trying to connect with Jean. “She’s left the mansion, but she’s trying to block my thoughts. She’s so strong. It may be too late.”

Chapter Text

Logan scrambled to his feet. “I’ve got to find, Y/N.” He ran out of the room.

“Logan!” Ororo called after him. “Logan! Wait!”

Logan ignored Ororo; the only thing on his mind was finding you and fixing this mess.

“We’ve got to go after Jean!” She continued.

“Not until I talk to Y/N,” Logan responded, slamming his palm against the elevator button.

The elevator moved too slowly for Logan’s liking. He was bouncing on his heels as his fists clenched, claws threatening to release. He needed to fix this with you. He didn’t want Jean. He only wanted you and Jean had forced his hand. As soon as the door opened, Logan was rushing out, trying to follow your scent. He skipped multiple stairs as he lunged up them, following the scent of your smoke to your room. He tried the doorknob, not surprised to find it locked.

“Y/N!” He called, knocking on the door. “Let me in, sweetheart. Let me explain.”

He could smell your smoke on the other side of the door and hear your sobs. Each one broke his heart. You didn’t answer him. Instead, you moved yourself into the bathroom, locking the door behind you. Nothing was on fire in your room besides yourself. Small flames covered your body as you curled up against the bathroom door. Your tears sizzled down your heated cheeks. Logan could hear everything going on, including you putting further distance between you and him.

“Logan!” Ororo exclaimed, appearing in the hallway. “We need you and Y/N downstairs. Charles has a location on Jean.”

“Not now!” Logan retorted.

“Jean is out there and dangerous. We need to handle her.”

You could hear the conversation through the doors. You knew that you couldn’t hide forever and that it would grow embarrassing if anyone else came to the door. Standing up, you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. You could see the heartbreak within yourself staring back at you, and the dog tags that constantly hung from your neck felt like a noose. With a shaky hand, you pulled the dog tags from around your neck. You walked out of the bathroom and threw them on the bed before opening the door.

“Let’s go,” your voice was quiet but with barely anything emotion.

“Y/N—“

Logan tried to grab your arm, but you were quick to get down the hallway before he could touch you. Logan sighed, glancing into the room. His breath caught in his throat as he saw what lay on the bed. Slowly, he walked over and grabbed his dog tags, the engagement ring still in the midst of them. You never took them off, just as he never took yours off. This just proved how badly the incident with Jean had truly hurt you. He placed them around his neck before heading down to the garage.

You and Charles were already sitting in the back of one of the cars with Ororo in the passenger seat, leaving the driver's seat open for Logan. He got in, and Charles guided him on where to go. As Logan drove, the tension in the car grew. He continually glanced back at you using the rearview mirror. You kept your eyes on the scenery outside. You could feel Logan’s eyes every time he got a look at you like he was burning holes into you.

Charles guided Logan to Jean’s childhood home. You and Ororo got Charles situated into his wheelchair as Logan studied the neighborhood.

“Wait for me here,” Charles directed, wheeling towards the house at the end of the cul-de-sac.

“What?” Logan’s head snapped in Charles’ direction.

“I need to see Jean alone.”

“You were right, Charles,” Erik said, coming up from the side with multiple other mutants. “This one is special.”

“What the hell are you doing here?” Logan asked.

“The same as the Professor. Visiting an old friend.”

“I don’t want trouble here,” Charles told Erik.

“Nor do I, Charles. So, shall we go inside?”

The two men made their way toward the house, leaving you, Ororo, and Logan on the road. Four mutants that Erik had brought stood in the front yard, guarding the house. Your fingers began twitching, little bursts of fire spitting from them as the tensions rose. It wasn’t long before the house began to rumble and react to the powers inside of it.

“I’m going in,” Logan said, stepping forward.

Ororo placed a hand on Logan’s chest, stopping him. “The Professor said he’d handle this,” she told him.

Logan glanced toward you. He could see the flames spurting from your fingers, signaling your nerves. You still hadn’t looked at him, choosing to focus on the mutants guarding the house. Suddenly, the windows of the house shattered from the inside.

“That’s it,” Logan growled, unleashing his claws.

He ran forward as Ororo lifted up into the air and began charging. You created flames in your hands. Logan took the larger mutant while Storm took two of them, and you took on the speedster.

You blasted the speedster through the door of the house before she could disappear. You followed her into the house. She suddenly appeared in front of you, punching you in the face. You cried out as you stumbled backward. You lit your whole body up, shooting flames from every direction. The speedster began to speed around you in a circle, causing the oxygen to begin to disappear along with your flames. You gasped, choking as the lack of oxygen continued.

“Y/N!” Logan shouted, seeing you in trouble.

He launched himself at the speedster, able to time it right to throw the speedster to the side. You fell to the ground, coughing as oxygen tried to reenter your lungs. The house began trembling more, slowly lifting into the air. You, Logan, and Ororo were thrown up to the ceiling as the house began to tear itself apart.

“No, Jean!” You heard Erik yell. “Jean!”

Logan grunted, using his claws to push himself across the ceiling towards the door that Charles and Jean were behind. He forced the door open in time for you to see Charles in the air, disintegrating.

“Charles!” You screamed.

Logan shouted, trying to reach Charles. Charles disappeared into the air and the house came down with a crash. Logan was thrown over to where you dropped to the ground.

“Are you all right?” He quickly asked, checking you for injuries.

“Charles,” you rasped.

You stumbled to your feet, ripping yourself away from Logan’s help. You rushed to the room where Charles, Jean, and Erik had been, only to find them all gone and the wheelchair left in the center.

“No!” You screamed, falling to your knees in front of the wheelchair.

“Oh, God!” Logan cried, falling beside you. You could hear Ororo sobbing behind you. “No!”

Ororo wrapped her arms around you and Logan as the three of you cried. Logan wasn’t one for tears, but Charles had done so much for him and for you. Charles was like a brother to you. He had taken the role of your protector and confidant as soon as you got to the mansion. He had never pushed you to know about your past and always encouraged you in ways that would make your life better.

Sobbing more, you curled in on yourself. Your chest was tightening, and it felt like your lungs were shrinking. Your sobs began turning into wheezes. Your skin began to grow hot as the anxiety set in deeper. Ororo’s arm slipped away from your body as she felt you grow hotter.

“Y/N,” she called through her tears, alerting Logan.

Logan was quick to move in front of you. His jaw clenched as his hands came up to your heated skin and pulled you up onto his lap. His pain didn’t matter to him; yours was his sole focus.

“Y/N, sweetheart,” the concern in his voice was clear. Logan moved one arm to wrap around your waist to keep you against him while his other hand moved to hold your head up. “I need you to breathe.”

You were still wheezing, your chest growing tighter and tighter. You tried to focus on Logan in front of you, but your sight was growing blurry, and it wasn’t just because of the tears.

“Focus on me, baby,” Logan was growing more and more concerned. “Focus and breathe.” His heart dropped the moment your eyes rolled back, and you went limp. “Y/N!”

Ororo’s finger went to check your pulse. It was there, and it was slowly calming. “She’ll be okay,” Ororo said. “We should…” She glanced over at the wheelchair, tears slipping down her cheeks. “We should get back to the mansion.”

Logan nodded, eyes still solely focused on you. He could only imagine the hell you were going through right now. Charles was dead due to Jean, and Logan hadn’t been able to talk to you about the scene you had walked into with him and Jean. Logan carefully moved you to be able to carry you and headed to the car. Ororo followed, pushing the wheelchair. When Ororo and Logan arrived at the car, Ororo could see that Logan was struggling with letting you out of his hold.

“I’ll drive,” Ororo told Logan. He nodded before opening the back door and slipping into the back seat with you still in his arms.

Ororo cried as she placed the wheelchair in the trunk. She stood back there, letting herself have a moment before going to the driver’s seat and heading back to the mansion. Ororo continued to glance back at you and Logan. Logan’s eyes were focused on you, and Ororo could see him growing more and more scared with every passing second. She knew it wasn’t just because you passed out. There was something else going on, hence the reason why you had been hiding away before going to Jean’s house and why Logan had both of your dog tags around his neck.

Logan was growing terrified of what may happen when you wake. You had yet to mourn Scott’s death, and now Charles was gone as well. Then there was the whole scene you walked in on with him and Jean. He knew that it had hurt you, and he needed to explain himself. But when you wake, would you be in a good mindset to talk? Would you let him explain himself? Or should he let you have your space? Logan’s heart twisted at the thought of you not wanting anything to do with him. He couldn’t handle that.

As soon as Ororo pulled up to the mansion, Logan was out of the car with you and heading to your room.

“Logan?” Rogue saw him carrying you through the halls. “What happened?”

“Not now,” he grunted, focusing on getting you to your room.

Ororo came up to Rogue, placing a hand on the young woman’s shoulder. “Rogue, can you gather the other students?”

“What happened?” Rogue asked.

“I’ll explain. Just gather everyone.” Rogue nodded, glancing up at Logan disappearing upstairs before heading off to gather everyone.

Chapter Text

The tension was heavy in the room. You could sense it without opening your eyes. You could also sense the brooding man sitting on the chair beside you.

Logan could tell that you were awake, yet you hadn’t opened your eyes. He wasn’t going to call you out on it, waiting for you to be ready. He was hunched over, hands clasped together, and eyes on his feet.

You blinked open your eyes and looked over at Logan. He looked so broken, and you absolutely hated that. But you knew what you had seen, and you hated him for it. There was also the fact that in the last twenty-four hours, Jean had come back from the dead, and Scott and Charles had been lost. You sat up, causing Logan to look at you.

The silence was drowning. But neither of you knew where to start.

“Y/N,” your name dropped from Logan’s lips like a desperate prayer.

You shook your head, emotions already rushing to the surface. “I can’t do this,” you rasped. “Not right now.”

“Please. Let me explain.”

You pushed yourself off the other side of the bed, standing on shaky legs. “No… not now. Not when Charles—“ You stopped yourself. Charles was gone. Your longest friendship besides Logan.

Logan stood up. His body was screaming for any touch from you, but he was careful not to make any sudden movements.

“Charles is gone,” you whispered. “Scott is gone.”

“I know,” Logan responded. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

You shook your head. “Don’t—Don’t call me that. You don’t get to call me that.”

Logan took a step towards you, causing you to take a step back. The heartbreak was written on both of your faces.

“You’ve got to give me a chance to explain, Y/N,” Logan was close to getting on his knees to beg for you to listen to him.

A knock on the door broke you two from the tension, causing you to jump.

“Y/N, Logan,” Ororo called. “I’ve gathered the students. Do you want to help break the news?”

You walked over to the door and opened it. “I’ll go.”

“Y/N,” Logan called.

You shut the door before he could stop you.

~~~

The students took the news as well as could be expected. You spent the rest of the day ignoring your own problems and grief so that you could focus on the students. You also helped Ororo plan a memorial service for the next day. Logan stuck to the shadows, constantly watching you. He wanted to be there for you, especially if you were to completely break down. You ignored Logan even though you could feel his eyes everywhere you went.

You were exhausted when the day was over. You trudged up the stairs to your room. All you wanted was to curl up in Logan’s arms and cry, but you couldn’t get the image of Logan on top of Jean out of your mind. As soon as you were in your room, you shut the door and locked it.

Logan was at the top of the stairs and heard the lock. He wanted to go to the door and beg for you to open up but didn’t know if he should. He wanted to respect your need for time and space. But there was something screaming at him to not let you be alone. With heavy steps, Logan came over to your door and knocked. He could hear you crying on the other side.

“Sweetheart,” Logan’s voice was shaking. He had to pause and swallow down some of his own emotions. “Please let me in… I won’t stay if you don’t want me to, but I want to clear the air… I need to tell you what happened.”

“Go away,” your muffled, scratchy voice came through the door. You were curled up on your bed, hugging your pillow tightly to your chest.

“I can’t do that, darlin’. Not until you hear me out… Plus, I’m worried about you… This has been a lot. Just let me in.”

“No.”

Logan sighed, head falling against the door. He wasn’t about to go to his room next door. He hadn’t slept in there since the two of you had rekindled your relationship. If he went in there, Logan felt like it was all over.

“Fine,” he responded with a huff. “I’ll be out here if you need anything. I’m not leaving you, sweetheart. I’m fightin’ for this. For us.”

You remained silent. Logan sighed and moved next to the door. He leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. Logan wasn’t sure if he’d sleep at all that night, but he was sure that he’d be there for you if you needed anything.

~~~

It took you a while to pull yourself out of bed when you woke in the morning. You knew you needed to get ready for the day and help set up for the memorial, but you had no energy to do so. Your movements were all slow and mindless as you got ready for the day. You paused at your door, hand on the knob. Logan had said that he was going to be out there, would he still be when you opened the door?

Taking a deep breath, you opened the door. You saw Logan’s boots before anything else. Logan was up against the wall next to your door. His head had fallen to his shoulder, and his mouth was slightly opened with soft snores. Your heart melted slightly at the slight. Knowing that Logan could startle easily, you needed to wake him before anyone else could. You stepped further out of your room and shut the door behind you.

Logan jumped awake, getting onto his feet with his claws appearing with a snikt. He looked around frantically until his eyes landed on you.

“Morning,” you mumbled.

“Y/N,” he breathed out. He straightened up, pulling his claws back in.

“You should clean up. The memorial is in an hour.”

You turned and walked away without another word. Logan watched until you couldn’t be seen anymore. Rolling his shoulders, Logan realized that sleeping against the wall wasn’t the most comfortable. But he would do it every day he needed to until he could fix this.

~~~

Ororo asked if you’d say something at the memorial, but you told her it was all on her. You sat in the front row of chairs on the back lawn. The chairs were facing a newly put-together cement memorial with an unlit eternal flame at the bottom of it. There was an empty chair at your side; everyone expected Logan to sit there, but he never came. Hank was on your other side. He watched as you looked around, shoulders slumping when you couldn’t spot Logan. Hank reached over and took your hand, giving it a light squeeze. You shot him a small smile before going back to focusing on the white rose lying across your lap.

Ororo stood in front of the students and faculty, giving her speech. “We live in an age of darkness, a world full of fear, hate, and intolerance. But in every age, there are those who fight against it. Charles Xavier was born into a world divided, a world he tried to heal—a mission he never saw accomplished. It seems the destiny of great men to see their goals unfulfilled. Charles was more than a leader, more than a teacher. He was a friend. When we were afraid, he gave us strength. And when we were alone,” Ororo glanced at you, “he gave us family. He may be gone, but his teachings live on through us, his students. Wherever we may go, we must carry on his vision. And that’s a vision of a world united.”

Ororo gave you a nod, and you stood up. You walked over to the memorial. Movement on the balcony of the school caught your eye. You looked over to see Logan intently watching you. You ripped your eyes away and formed a perfect flame in the palm of your hand. You blew it over to the eternal flame, lighting it.

When the memorial ended, you found your way back to your room. Swinging the door behind you, it ended up not closing. You didn’t care as you went around and sat on your bed.

Logan peeked through the open door. Your back was to the door, your shoulders weighed down with the weight of the world. As quietly as possible, Logan slipped into the room and shut the door behind him.

“Sweetheart,” he breathed out, carefully treading the situation.

“Leave me alone, Logan,” you responded quietly. “I just want to be alone.” It was a lie, and you both knew it.

“I can’t do that.” He took a few steps toward you. “I told you, I’m fightin’ for us.” You stayed quiet, not having a whole lot of energy to fight Logan at the moment. He walked around the bed and knelt in front of you. “I need you to listen to me.”

“Logan—“

He quickly grabbed your hands and held them firmly in his. “Please. Hear me out, and then you can kick me out.”

His thumbs began rubbing against your warm skin, hoping to calm you enough so that you don’t try to burn him to a crisp. Tears filled your eyes as you looked down at how his rough hands, used for killing, were so soft and gentle with your own hands.

“Okay,” you rasped with a nod. “Explain.”

“I had gone looking for you after you left the lab. When I couldn’t find you, I went back to see if you were waiting for Jean to wake. She woke when I arrived. And… something happened. She got into my brain. I wasn’t in control, and she kissed me. I didn’t want to kiss her. My mind tried to fight her. When you entered, I felt sick, but it helped give me the strength to fight her off more. She wasn’t in her right mind, and she was controlling my mind. None of that is an excuse though… Sweetheart,” he moved his head, trying to catch your gaze, “I will never forgive myself for making you run from the lab and putting myself into that situation with Jean.”

“I just… I know that she’s so much better than me in every way, and I—“

“Stop that. Don’t ever talk about yourself that way. No one is better than you, darlin’. You took me back after I had completely forgotten you. You are there for me when I am at my lowest and are patient with the fact that I still don’t remember everything.” His hands let go of yours and moved to cradle your face. “You are perfect in my eyes, baby. I don’t deserve you in any way, but I will strive to do what I can to deserve you each and every day.”

“Every time I close my eyes, I see you on top of her.”

“I know, I know, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.” His thumbs wiped away the tears that began to trickle down your cheeks. “I wish I could take that memory away.”

“Everything hurts, James.”

“Tell me what I can do.”

You shook your head the best you could with Logan’s hands cradling your face. “There’s nothing.”

Logan’s heart was breaking with each group of tears that fell from your eyes. He could feel your skin growing hotter, beginning to burn his skin, but that didn’t matter. “You’ve got to give me something, darlin’. Anything. I will do it.”

You thought for a second. “Hold me.”

Logan didn’t waste another second before he wrapped you up in his arms. He moved so that he was lying on the bed, and you were on top of him. You gripped onto his shirt, slowly burning it as you cried. Logan didn’t care. His only focus was you and you alone.

“I’ve got you, baby. I’ve got you.”

Logan held a kiss to your head as his arms wrapped around you tighter. He wished he could take on this pain from you. You didn’t deserve it. Your life hadn’t been easy, and it seemed like you wouldn’t be allowed to get a break any time soon. So if he couldn’t take it all away, Logan would do everything in his power to make this okay for you again. Including his relationship with you.

Chapter Text

Once Logan was sure that you were sound asleep, he slipped out of the room. There were things he wanted to gather for you, like flowers, for you to wake up to. He went into the garden and cut down some flowers, making a homemade bouquet. After he had put it together and into a vase, Logan noticed Rogue with a hood up and backpack slung over her shoulder. She was heading for the door.

“You need a lift, kid?” He asked, sneaking up on her.

Rogue spun around. “No,” she muttered.

“Where’re you going?”

“You don’t know what it’s like to be afraid of your powers, to be afraid to get close to anybody.”

“Yeah, I do.” Logan understood that more than Rogue could ever understand.

“I wanna be able to touch people, Logan. A hug, a handshake, a kiss.”

“I hope you’re not doing this for some boy.” Rogue looked away. “Look, if you wanna go, then go. Just be sure it’s what you want.”

Rogue was surprised by Logan’s words. “Shouldn’t you be telling me to stay, to go upstairs and unpack?”

“I’m not your father. I’m your friend… Just think about what I said, Rogue.”

“Marie,” she corrected.

“Marie.” Logan gave her a tight smile as he squeezed her shoulder. “Do what you believe you need to do, kid. I’ll still be here.”

“Thanks, Logan. I’ll see you around.”

“See you around, kid.”

~~~

You could feel Logan’s heartbeat beneath your head as you began to wake. It was almost like a lullaby, pulling you back into the land of dreams. You felt Logan’s arms shift around you, telling you that he was awake. You moved your head to look up at Logan.

“Morning,” you rasped.

His eyes snapped down to meet yours, immediately softening. “Morning, sweetheart.” He leaned down and kissed your head. “How are you?”

“I’m… fine.” Moving your hands against the white tank on his chest, you realized there were some singed holes. “I burnt your shirt.”

“It’s okay. I have plenty of these.”

“I’m sorry… for everything. I should have heard you out when you first came to me.”

“It’s okay. I understand why you didn’t.”

“It’s been a crazy few days.”

“Yes, it has.”

“How have you been handling it?”

Logan took a moment before responding. “Terrified.” You were surprised at his honesty. “I don’t think I can handle losing you.”

“I’ll do my best to make sure that doesn’t happen.” You buried yourself further into him. “I love you.”

He kissed your head. “Love you too.”

~~~

You and Logan eventually found your way down to the Professor’s office. Ororo, Hank, Kitty, and Bobby were already in there, discussing the future of the school.

“So what now?” Bobby asked. “What do we do?”

“Professor Xavier started this school, perhaps it’s best that it end with him,” Hank suggested.

“We’ll have to tell the students they’re going home,” you said. “And—“

“Most of us don’t have anywhere to go,” Bobby cut in. “I can’t believe this. I can’t believe we’re not gonna fight for this school.”

“I’m sorry,” an unfamiliar young man cut in, entering the room. “I know this is a bad time. I was told that this was a safe place for mutants.”

“It was, son,” Hank responded.

“And it still is,” Ororo said, standing up to go to the young man. “We’ll find you a room. Hank, tell all the students this school stays open.”

~~~

“Ororo will do a good job running the school,” you said. Logan and you were outside, standing in front of Charles’ memorial.

“You not interested in running it?” Logan wondered.

“No.” You shook your head. “Besides, Charles had mentioned a few times that he wanted it to be Ororo.”

“Y/N,” you heard Jean’s voice call out in your mind. You spun around, trying to see if she was near. “Y/N!”

“What’s wrong?” Logan asked, concerned.

“It’s—AH!”

Jean’s voice shouted through your head as pictures of a forest appeared. Your hands shot to your head as you fell to your knees. Logan fell beside you, his hands out. He had no idea if he should touch you or not. Jean’s voice continued to cry your name as different images of a crowded forest appeared.

“Y/N, sweetheart,” Logan’s tone was urgent.

You were rocking as Jean continued to torment your mind. “Jean,” you whimpered. “It’s… Jean.”

You suddenly lurched forward, Logan catching you. The grip that Jean had on you released, leaving your mind reeling. The images that Jean showed you were imprinted on your brain and continued to play in your mind.

“Honey?” Logan called, trying to pull you back into reality.

“I know where Jean is,” you whispered.

“What?”

“I know where Jean is… she’s with Magneto… She’s not that far. They’re in the forest.”

“Why would she connect with you now?”

“I don’t know… but I… I’m going to go to her. I can bring her back.”

“No.”

“I have to.”

“You said she’s with Magneto. It could be a trap.”

“I can handle it.”

“If you’re going, then I’m going with you.”

“Magneto can control you.”

“And Jean can control everyone. We’re doing this together.”

“Jean called for me. If we both go… I don’t know what she’ll do.”

“Then I’m going alone. It’s too dangerous for you. I can track her.”

“Not a chance!”

“You’re not going.” Logan’s tone turned dark, trying to force his opinion upon you.

“Try and stop me.” Flames flicked at your fingertips as you challenged Logan.

“I’m not going to fight you.”

“Then how are you going to prevent me from going?” Without another word, Logan lunged forward and threw you over his shoulder. “Put me down!” You began kicking at him, your touch burning through his clothes and onto his skin. “Logan!”

Logan clenched his jaw, ignoring the pain and your squirming as he held onto you tighter. He carried you down to the lower levels and into the Danger Room. The simulation that you used for training a few days before began to start up. Logan set you down and ran off.

“Logan!” You shouted, searching for him.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” you could hear his voice echo through the room, meaning that he was using the outside mic. “I’m doing this for you… I’m doing this for the Professor and for Scott. I’m going to bring Jean back. I’m going to fix this.”

“James! Logan! Let me out of here!”

The simulation was roaring all around you. You were spinning around, struggling to remember where the door was.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” Logan’s voice came through the speakers again. “I can fix this.”

You could hear the mic cut, and you knew that Logan was off. You could feel yourself growing hotter with anger. You screamed out, fire engulfing every inch of you. As quickly as you could, you destroyed the robot in the simulation, successfully ending it. Your flames died down once the door was in your sight. You tried to open it, but it wouldn’t budge.

“Let me out!” You shouted, pounding against the door. “Let me out!”

You knew that it was pointless to try and burn or melt your way through the door. Charles had made sure it could withstand a variety of mutations for training purposes. You began to long for Charles. He would have found you quickly, being able to read your thoughts. But now you were alone. No one besides Logan knew where you were, and you didn’t know if anyone would ever find you until he returned.

After a few more tries with screaming and making noise, you found yourself sitting against the wall at the far end of the Danger Room. The silence and loneliness slowly began to eat away at you. You hated how helpless and thrown away you felt. Especially since it was Logan, who locked you up. The two of you had made up last night, only for him to go and do this to you.

~~~

The guilt was wrecking Logan. With each step he took away from you, he knew that gaining your trust back would take even longer. If he didn’t completely lose it now. Logan felt like he had to do this, though. You had lost so much. He had to do what he could to fix this. He had to bring Jean back—your sister—for Ororo and for you. But Logan also knew that he had to keep you safe, and this was the best and worst way he could think of.

Chapter Text

Retrieving Jean was a failure. Logan was almost immediately found by Magneto, and Jean clearly didn’t want to come with Logan. He did find out that they were preparing a large attack on Worthington Labs, and he knew that he needed to get the team together to stop Magneto and his followers.

“Y/N?” Logan burst through the front door of the mansion. He could only hope that someone had found you. “Y/N! Storm!”

“Logan!” Ororo came down the stairs. “Where have you been?”

“I need help. I found Jean. She’s with Magneto.”

“Where are they?”

“They’re on the move. I know where they’re going.”

“You’re saying you saw Magneto?” Hank asked, walking up.

“Yeah. Gotta go now. They’re going to attack Alcatraz.”

“There are troops stationed on that island.”

“Not enough to stop him.”

“Let’s suit up,” Ororo said.

“Where’s Y/N?”

“I thought she was with you.”

“Fuck.”

Logan broke into a run, heading down to the lower levels. He slid to a stop in front of the doors he had locked you behind. He began to pry open the door since he had destroyed the controls with his claws to keep you in there.

“What the—“

“I need help!” Logan grunted, cutting off Ororo.

Hank immediately began helping pull open the doors. Eventually, they pried the doors open enough for them to slide away. The three of them immediately laid eyes on you. You were curled up against the wall on the other side of the Danger Room. They rushed forward, and what they saw when they got closer broke their hearts. Your eyes were glazed over, with dried tear trails lying on your cheeks, and your whole body was trembling.

“What happened here?” Hank asked, sharing a worried glance with Ororo.

Logan knelt down in front of you, the guilt destroying him inside. He reached out to pull you into him but quickly pulled back when your skin burned him worse than you had ever burned him before. He looked at his burnt, blackened hands that were slowly healing.

“Logan,” Ororo’s voice was stern, “what did you do?”

“Jean connected with Y/N,” Logan began to explain, never looking away from your trembling form. “We fought about going to bring Jean back. I decided that it was best if I went. She was going to fight me, so I locked her in here for her protection.”

“You locked her in here?” Hank repeated. “She’s been in here alone all night!”

“I know that, Hank!” Logan moved to lie down in front of you, trying to get your eyes to focus on him. “Sweetheart, I need you to focus on me.” His hands slowly moved to touch your arms, not caring if he got burnt. He needed to bring you back to him. His thumbs rubbed against your burning skin. “I need you to break out of this trance. Please, baby, come back.”

“You… left… me…” You rasped, slowly coming to.

“I know, sweetheart. I know. Just let me—”

“You left me.” You scooted away from Logan’s touch as anger began to fester.

In the hours that you had been alone, your mind had begun to play tricks on you. Well, you couldn’t tell if it was your mind or a simulation was being run in the room. Everything was so real. Stryker had appeared multiple times, reminding you of the hell that you had gone through with him. Your father had appeared, blaming you for every bad thing that had ever happened. Jean had appeared, as well as Logan. Logan had left you for her, and they taunted their relationship in front of you.

“Y/N,” Hank called your name as he crouched down on the other side of you. “We need to get you out of here.”

“Please,” you whimpered.

Logan watched as you cooled your skin down enough for Hank to help you up. He sat up as Hank led you out of the room, keeping you in his sight until you disappeared into the hallway.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” Ororo said, shaking her head. “She was alone down here for hours—more than half a day.”

“I was trying to—“

“No one wants your excuses, Logan.” She sighed. “Now we have to help her, and we’ll be one person down when we go to Magneto. Which we are also running out of time to do.”

“I can fix this.” Logan scrambled to his feet. “I can—“

“Maybe stop trying to fix things right now. Hank will handle Y/N. We should go suit up.”

Logan wanted to argue more, but he knew that Ororo had a point. You were not okay, and it was his fault, once again. How did he keep doing this to you? He was supposed to love and protect you from everything. Yet, he seemed to be the thing that was hurting you the most.

~~~

“Talk to me,” Hank urged as he checked you over.

“I’m fine,” you mumbled.

“Liar. Logan shouldn’t have done that.” You looked away, hands still trembling slightly. “Seriously, Y/N, talk to me.”

“I was stuck in a loop of my greatest fears… I honestly don’t know if it was my mind or if a simulation was running…” Your hands began to shake slightly.

“I’m so very sorry, Y/N. You need to stay here and rest. I’ll be back to check on you as soon as I can.”

“Where are you going?”

Hank sighed. “Magneto is planning on attacking Worthington Labs at Alcatraz.”

“Is Jean with him?”

“Yes.”

“I’m coming.”

Before you could slide off the table, Hank was holding you still. “No. You need a break. You need to rest.”

“We don’t have enough teammates, Hank. You need me. I’ll be fine.”

Hank knew that you were right and also knew that you’d burn all his fur off to get your way. “Fine. But you stay close.”

~~~

“I don’t believe this once fit me,” Hank grumbled, his old leather jacket unable to close around him. They were headed to the hangar.

“If Magneto gets ahold of that cure, there will be no stopping him,” Logan stated, tugging his leather gloves on.

“Can you estimate how many he has?”

“An army. And Jean.”

“His powers have limits, hers do not.”

Logan came to a stop when he saw you in your suit, standing with the group of students you trained and Ororo. You were refusing to look at him, understandably so.

“There’s only seven of us, Logan,” Bobby said.

“Yeah,” Logan replied. “We’re outnumbered. I’m not gonna lie to you. But we lost Scott. We lost the Professor. If we don’t fight now, everything they stood for will die with them. I’m not gonna let that happen. Are you?” Bobby shook his head. “Then we stand together… X-Men,” he looked around at the group, “all of us.”

“We’re in.”

“Let’s go.”

You watched as Hank, Ororo, Kitty, Bobby, and Colossus headed for the jet. Logan stood beside you, staring at you.

“They’re ready,” he told you.

“Yeah, I know,” you replied weakly.

“Y/N,” Logan reached out, but you stepped away.

“I can’t do this right now.”

You rushed over to the jet and found a seat in the corner. Logan wanted to sit by you but instead sat next to Ororo in one of the pilot’s seats, knowing that you needed your space.

The battle had already begun when you arrived. Magneto had moved the Golden Gate Bridge to allow his followers to cross to the island.

“On, my stars and garters,” Hank muttered.

“Goin’ to stealth mode,” Ororo stated, pressing the needed buttons.

The jet landed on the rooftop, and you all were quickly out. Storm made your entrance known with her lightning as she floated down. Beast jumped down next with Kitty and Bobby helping each other. Colossus was fine on his own, leaving you and Logan on top of the building.

“Here,” Logan reached out to you, “get on my back.”

You shook your head. “I don’t need your help.”

You jumped off the building, hitting the ground hard and rolling to a stop. Logan saw a few drops of blood from where you had been cut in places, and his jaw clenched. You were going to be reckless during this fight, he could feel it. Using his claws, Logan slid down the building and lined up with the rest of you.

“You men, cover the doors!” Logan ordered the military men there. “Everybody, get together! And hold this line!”

Magneto was standing at the edge of the broken bridge with more of his followers behind him. Jean was near, staring at the battle.

“Finish them!” Magneto ordered.

Magneto’s followers charged, attacking your team and the military. Your hands went up in flames as you began to throw fire at the oncoming army of mutants. Logan kept you in his line of sight at all times. He knew that you could handle yourself, but he also didn’t know what type of mutants you were dealing with. Suddenly, the speedster from days ago appeared near you. She smirked before running in circles around you. You fell to your knees as the oxygen began to disappear from the area.

“Y/N!” Logan roared as he saw what was happening.

You were choking, growing dizzy as Logan fought to get to you. With a loud grunt, Logan impaled the speedster with his claws. You fell to the ground, coughing as you tried to get more air into your lungs. Logan threw the mutant’s body away before rushing to your side.

“Y/N, are you—“

“Stay away,” you rasped, pushing yourself away from Logan. He didn’t try to mask the hurt in his expression. “I can handle myself.”

Logan clenched his jaw, eyes hardening. “Clearly.”

You stood up and ran off to go fight more mutants, Logan’s eyes following you. Jean had watched the whole interaction. Before you could form another flame, you were suddenly lifted up and pulled toward her. Logan tried to run for you, but was quickly swamped with attacking mutants.

“Jean,” you gasped, being held in the air above her. “You can help stop this.”

“What if I don’t want to?” She replied.

“This isn’t you, Jean. Come back to us.”

You could see that only made her angrier. “This is me.”

“Let me go, Jean.”

“I always thought that Logan had feelings for me. It was always nagging in the back of my mind, but I guess, so was the real me.”

“Your words can’t hurt me. I know— I know that Logan loves me as I love him. You’re just lost, Jean. Confused. We can help you.”

“I don’t need help.”

You were suddenly launched back. You hit the building with a loud crack and fell to the ground, barely conscious.

“Y/N!” / “EMBER!”

The world was blurry around you and pain radiated from multiple points in your body. You were sure you had a concussion and multiple broken bones. It would all heal, but with time. Out of the corner of your blurry vision, you saw a burning vehicle being hurled toward you.

“Y/N!” Logan screamed. You cried out in pain as Logan grabbed you, barely rolling away in time. “I’ve got you,” he mumbled against you, holding you too tight for comfort. “I’ve got you.”

“Lo—gan—“ you croaked.

He pulled away just enough to look at your face. “I’m right here, sweetheart.”

“It—You—hurts—let—go.” Every word was an achy breath.

Logan was quick to let you go and simply kneel beside you with his hands hovering. “What can I do? Tell me what I can do.”

“Go—help—them.” Something inside yourself began to scream at you that something was wrong. Your healing should have started the slow process, but the pain was only getting worse.

“I can’t leave you!” Logan could smell your blood and your smoke, everything worrying him to his very core.

“Go…”

Logan looked around. Fiery cars were still being thrown around, with the X-Men and the military taking cover. From your position, you would be covered as long as no mutants found you. He didn’t want to dare leave you again, but he knew he couldn’t do anything until this fight was done.

“I promise I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he said, holding a kiss to your forehead. “You stay here. Stay hidden. I’ll be back. Okay?” You barely nodded. “I’ll be right back, sweetheart.”

At this point, Logan’s words were more for himself than anything. Hating to have to turn away from you, Logan rushed across the battlefield to find Storm taking cover. He noticed the car on the ground at the same time Hank and Storm did. The three of them shared a look.

“We work as a team,” Logan stated.

“Best defense is a good offense,” Storm replied.

“Bobby! You think you can take out your old friend?”

Bobby nodded, running towards Pyro. He froze the next burning car in mid-air.

“Storm,” Logan said next, “we’re gonna need some cover.”

“Right,” Storm responded. She looked up in the sky, eyes growing cloudy as fog took over the area.

Logan went over to Colossus. “This is it.” Colossus grabbed him. “Hey, make it a strike.”

The younger mutant lifted Logan up and spun around before launching him at Magneto. Magneto was quick to use his own abilities to stop Logan in the air, forcing him down to the ground, skidding to a stop in front of Magneto.

“You never learn, do you?” Magneto taunted.

“Actually,” Logan panted, “I do.”

Hank appeared from behind Magneto and stuck the cure into Magneto’s chest. With wide eyes, Magneto sank to his knees.

“I’m—“ He couldn’t even finish his own thought.

“One of them?” Logan taunted.

Magneto turned to face Jean. “This is what they want for all of us.”

Logan made eye contact with Jean. “It’s over, Jean. It's over.”

“Is it?” She replied, voice hollow.

You had been going in and out of consciousness from where Logan had left you. Something was terribly wrong. You could hear the fighting all around you, but nothing was clear. Before you knew it, you were torn from your resting place and flying through the air. You came to a harsh stop in front of Jean. Logan’s eyes immediately went wide. Taking you in, it was clear that you weren’t healing. You had fresh blood everywhere, your skin was lighter than normal, and sweat glistened off of your forehead. Logan’s stomach twisted in knots. From behind, more military men, armed with guns loaded with the cure, ran over the debris.

“No!” Logan yelled, worried for your safety. “Don’t shoot!”

Jean stopped the shots without even looking. Her eyes went back, and her skin turned dark and crackled, proving that the Phoenix was the one in control. The darts disappeared as she turned around. Pieces of debris began floating in the air, along with you, as the military men began to disappear to ash. The building and debris around them began to blow up and disappear as well, while Jean turned back to face Logan and Hank.

“Everybody, get out of here!” Hank ordered. Humans and mutants began to rush down the displaced bridge.

Storm came to a halt beside Hank and Logan. She glanced as you, dangling in the air, and then back at Logan.

“I’m the only one who can stop her,” Logan said, willing to do what it took to get to you. “Get everyone to safety. Go!” Storm flew off as Hank ran. Logan looked at you before pulling his eyes to the woman causing all this destruction. “Jean!”

Everything and everyone around them was turning to ash. The water from the bay began rising up over the area.

“Jean, I know you’re still there!” Logan shouted.

Logan began to walk towards her. Jean started using her powers to slow him down. He grunted as his suit started to disappear, with his flesh trying to do so as well. His eyes flickered to you with each painful step. He could see that part of you was starting to disappear. Logan fought harder, grunting and groaning as he climbed the debris to get to Jean.

“You would die for them?” Jean’s voice sounded like pure evil.

“No.” Logan’s eyes began welling up with tears as he spared you another glance. You were completely unconscious, having succumbed to whatever Jean had done to you. “Not for them… For her… For her… Anything and everything is for her.”

Jean started growing emotional as she shook her head. “Save me.”

“I’m sorry.”

With a snikt, Logan plunged his claws into Jean.

Chapter Text

The debris and water around the area quickly fell as Jean collapsed, dead. Logan spun around, looking for you. He couldn’t see you on top of any of the debris, making his heart sink.

“Y/N!” He screamed as he began using his senses to find you. “Y/N!” He caught a whiff of your blood and immediately began throwing debris. As soon as he could reach you, he pulled you into his lap. “Y/N? Sweetheart?” His heart dropped at the realization of how cold you were. “No.”

He frantically looked for any sign that your body had begun to heal itself, but there was none. His fingers shot up to the pulse point at your neck, waiting with bated breath for something—anything to tell him that you were alive. He came up with nothing.

“No, no, no, no, no!” Tears began pouring out of Logan’s eyes. “Somebody help me!”

“Logan!” Hank shouted, running towards Logan. “Logan, what—“ The blue, hairy mutant came stumbling to a stop. His eyes widened as he took in the scene of you limply laying in Logan’s arms with Jean dead a few feet away.

“Why is she not healing?!” Logan began panicking. What had happened that caused you to not be able to heal?

Hank broke out of his trance and rushed over to kneel on the other side of you. He placed two fingers under your neck and silently prayed for a pulse. His heart sank further with each passing second.

“Logan—“

“Do something, Hank! I need you to do something! Anything! I can’t lose her again!”

“I can find us a jet, perhaps get her back to the mansion. But, Logan, there’s no promises that she’ll… that she’ll wake.”

Logan shook his head, pulling you closer into his chest. “She’s not dead! She can heal!”

“She’s not healing, Logan.”

“No! You need to do something! You need to try! Or I swear to God that I will kill you.”

Hank gave a solemn nod. “I will go see if there’s a jet we can borrow.” Hank rushed off, worrying about how Logan would react if you didn’t wake up.

Logan’s eyes fell back on you. He began rocking back and forth. “I need you to wake up, baby,” he whispered, using everything in him to beg. “This isn’t funny. I know that I’ve made a shit ton of mistakes, but I can’t fix them if you’re not here… Wake up, sweetheart. Please.”

~~~

Hank was thankful to quickly find a jet that they could use. The X-Men piled up in it, steering clear of Logan and you. Hank brought Jean’s body on board, covering it with something so no one had to look. It was completely quiet the whole way back to the mansion.

“Logan,” Hank called once they had landed. “I need you to give her to me.” The Wolverine simply growled, holding on to you tighter. Hank sighed. “I can’t do anything with you holding her.”

“Work around me,” Logan snapped.

“I can’t do that.”

“Try.”

“Logan,” Ororo walked up, trying her hand with him. “We know that you love Y/N; we do too. But you have to let her go in order to help her.”

Logan shook his head. “What if I let her go. and she’s truly gone?”

“We don't know that until we let Hank try.”

After a brief second, Logan nodded, loosening his grip on you. Hank quickly took you and carried you off to the lab. Logan felt empty without you, sliding to the floor and breaking down. Ororo was quick to kneel beside him, trying to comfort him.

“I can’t—She can’t be—I don’t think I’ll—“ Logan’s mind was spiraling so fast that he couldn’t finish a single thought. “I should’ve stayed with her. I should have protected her… Ororo…” She sucked in a breath as Logan used her real name for the first time. “What if I’ve lost her?”

Though Ororo knew that Logan didn’t like physical affection from anyone besides you and sometimes Rogue, but she couldn’t help herself. She flung herself at Logan, holding him close. His head fell against her shoulder as heart-wrenching sobs began to wrack his body. Ororo rubbed Logan’s back as she let him cry. She knew it was pointless trying to say anything of comfort. She had seen you for herself and was utterly heartbroken at the thought of losing you after the loss of Scott, Charles, and Jean. But she didn’t love you in the way Logan did, for as long as Logan had. So Ororo would do what she could, which was to hold Logan as he let out his emotions while she said a silent prayer to whoever was listening.

~~~

Hank had to keep his emotions in check as he worked on you. The first thing he had to do was check to see if you had been injected with the cure without anyone’s knowledge. It was the only thing that he could think of for the reason why you weren’t healing, why you weren’t breathing. As Hank took a vial of your blood, he quickly realized that your blood was bubbling like it was boiling. He quickly began to run the test for the cure as he took another few vials, noticing the same thing: your blood was boiling.

Hank locked down the lab, not wanting anyone to enter if something was terribly wrong. He knew that Logan would fight it and could get in with his adamantium claws, but he had to take that chance. There was something going on with you. His only hypothesis was that Jean’s own powers had down something when she was controlling you. But what?

Checking the monitoring for your stats, Hank noticed that your temperature began rising again, though you still had no heartbeat.

“What are you doing, Y/N?” He muttered to himself.

It didn’t take long before Hank could confirm that you hadn’t been injected with the cure. He carefully monitored you, making note of your slowly rising temperature.

“Hank!” Logan yelled, pounding on the large lab doors. “Let me in!”

“Not a good idea, Logan!” Hank responded, not taking his eyes off the monitors as your temperature rose faster.

“I need to be with her!” The monitors began frantically beeping as your temperature rose to dangerous levels. Logan could hear them. “What’s going on?!”

“Stay out there!” Hank backed away as smoke began to lift from your body.

Logan sniffed, smelling the familiar scent of your smoke. He unsheathed his claws and before Hank or Ororo could stop him, cut a large hole in the lab doors. He rushed in, with Ororo right behind him, only to see your body go up in flames.

“NO!” He hurried forward only to be pushed back as your flames suddenly grew. “Y/N!”

“Storm!” Hank shouted. “Can you put her out?”

Storm shook her head. “I don’t know if I should.”

“Someone do something!” Logan yelled.

Abruptly, the flames that had engulfed you disappeared, leaving behind a heap of ashes where your body once was. Logan reached out, hands trembling over your ashes, before collapsing to the ground.

“No,” he breathed out. “No…”

Hank looked down, shoulders slumped as Ororo covered her mouth in shock. The two watched as Logan let a few tears trickle down his cheeks before his jaw clenched and his eyes closed. His hand found the dog tags tucked underneath his leather suit and tore them from around his neck. Logan’s eyes snapped open, with a cold, determined look in them. He stood up and tossed the dog tags onto the pile of ashes. Spinning around, Logan marched out of the room.

“Logan!” Ororo called after him, Hank following. “Where are you going?”

“This is not my home,” he sneered. “Not without Y/N.”

“That’s not true,” she shook her head, trying to get in front of the man. When she did, he simply stepped around her. “This can be your home. We care about you.”

“There’s nothing for me here anymore.”

“Logan, please… we all have lost enough. We need each other.”

“I do better alone.”

“No, you don’t,” Hank responded. “Don’t go, Logan.”

Logan paused for a brief moment, thinking about you. He was sure you wouldn't want him to be alone. But you weren’t here to stop him.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled before heading upstairs.

Ororo and Hank didn’t bother going after him, knowing that it was hard to change Logan’s mind. And that Logan needed time to mourn your death.

~~~

A week passed since the Battle of Alcatraz Island. Jean had been buried with both her and Scott given memorials next to Charles’. No one was ready to give you one yet. No one had set foot in the lab since you had turned to ash.

Rogue, now going by Marie, returned having taken the cure. She and Bobby finally got to touch, but her biggest concern was Logan.

Though no one had officially followed Logan, they had heard that he was at a nearby bar, drinking and fighting his way through his grief. Ororo and Hank made sure to keep tabs on Logan by bribing bar regulars and did their best to keep Marie from going to Logan. He wasn’t okay, and no one wanted her to see him like that.

“The President wants me to be the new ambassador to the United Nations,” Hank told Ororo one night. They were sitting in the Professor’s office, often finding themselves there at night when they couldn’t sleep. “He wants me in DC tomorrow to announce it.”

“You should go,” Ororo encouraged. “You’ve helped out so much. You need to get back to your own life.”

Hank nodded. “I should clean up the lab before I go.”

“We should put the ashes in an urn. Logan may want them one day.”

“Okay… I just wish I could understand what happened to her. Why did her healing abilities stop working? How did she turn to ash?”

“I do, too. For Logan’s sake.”

“Keep me updated on him, will you?”

“Of course.”

Hank wished Ororo goodnight and headed downstairs to find something to clean your ashes into. He immediately froze at the door when he arrived. The ash pile had grown, with a similar shape to yours. Slowly, he moved closer. All of a sudden, you gasped, shooting up. The ashes fell off of you and onto the floor, revealing your naked body.

“Oh, my— Y/N!” Hank exclaimed.

He grabbed the lab coat from a nearby chair and rushed to your side. He draped it over your shoulders as he began to take in your form. There were no scars on your skin. It was like brand new.

“What—“ you cut yourself off with a cough. “What happened?” You glanced around the room. “Where’s Logan?”

“What do you last remember?” Hank asked.

“Uh… we were at Alcatraz Island. I was injured, I think… Jean got a hold of me, and then nothing.”

“Well, you died.”

“What?”

“You died a week ago.”

“No,” you shook your head. “That’s not possible.”

“I know, but somehow you died, and then when we got you back here, your body went up in flames. You turned to ash.”

“That’s… insane.” You looked around again, finally noticing the dog tags in your lap. You carefully picked them up. “These are mine and Logan’s. Where is he?”

Hank sighed. “He left after you turned to ash.”

Your heart dropped. “He left?”

“Yes, but we’ve been informed that he’s at a nearby bar, drinking away and cage fighting.”

“I have to go get him.” You scrambled off the table, the lab coat slipping off you.

“Uh, Y/N?”

“What?”

“You may want to put some clothes on.”

You looked down to find yourself naked. You picked up the lab coat and wrapped it around yourself. “Right. Thanks.”

“Be careful. Logan’s not okay.”

“That’s why I can’t waste another second.”

Chapter Text

Logan saw you every time he closed his eyes. He saw you every time his mutation let him feel a little drunk. He saw you every time he passed out, letting his opponent win the cage fight. You were everywhere, haunting him. But Logan didn’t mind. He needed to keep you with him somehow.

Tossing back another drink, Logan slammed the glass on the counter. The bartender jumped, turning to face the man.

“Another,” Logan mumbled, eyes unfocused.

“I don’t think that’s smart, buddy,” the bartender responded. “You should get going. It’s raining badly out there.”

“Don’t care.”

“I’m serious. You’re done.”

Suddenly, Logan was reaching across the bar. His fists grabbed the bartender’s shirt as he tugged him closer. “I get to decide that.”

The bartender swallowed nervously. “You need to go home.”

“Don’t have one.”

“Then call someone.”

“Don’t have anyone.”

“Nothing that I can do about that, pal. I’m not serving you anymore.”

“Logan?”

Logan ignored the familiar call of his name. He shoved the bartender away and threw some money on the counter. Turning on his heel, Logan marched out of the bar, closing his eyes as he passed what he believed was an illusion of you. The rain soaked Logan quickly as he headed towards the motorcycle.

“Logan!” You shouted after him. He simply shook his head. His mind was playing some cruel trick on him. “James!” He stopped.

“You’re not real,” he muttered. He squeezed his eyes shut. “Just another trick.”

Slowly, you walked up to him, stopping a few inches from his back. “I’m real, Logan… I’m alive.”

“No,” he shook his head. “You… you died…”

You reached how to take his wrist. As soon as your fingers brushed against his skin, his claws were out, and he was turned around. Logan’s claws pricked against your neck and side as he glared at you.

“You’re not real,” he heaved.

“James,” you breathed out. “I am so sorry about everything… I know that I… I died. But I’m back. I’m so very much real.”

You couldn’t completely light a fire amidst this rain, but you carefully wrapped your hand around Logan’s wrist, which was aiming claws at your neck. Slowly, you began to heat his skin up. You couldn’t imagine the demons that his brain had conjured over this last week and the toll that it had taken. Logan didn’t budge as the heat from your hand began to burn his wrist.

“Y/N…” he whispered, clearly still questioning everything.

“It’s me, James.”

“You died.”

“I know… I’m sorry.”

Slowly, his claws retracted. “This is some trick, right? My mind… I’ve lost it.”

You stepped closer, cooling down your hand but gripping his wrist tighter. “This isn’t a trick. I’m real.”

Logan’s free hand came up shakily to cup your cheek. It was clear he was still hesitant as his thumb began brushing against your skin. “Y/N…” You could see the tears swell up in his eyes. “Sweetheart?”

“It’s me, Logan. I’m alive. I’m here.”

Logan’s knees gave out, and before you knew it, he was kneeling in the mud. His head rested against your knees and he wrapped his arms around your legs to pull you closer. Your hands shot to his head to steady yourself and to try to bring him so comfort. You heart broke as Logan’s shoulders began to tremble as sobs wracked his body.

“Don’t—“ His voice cracked as he let his emotions loose. “Don’t disappear—Please.”

“Logan, baby,” you tried to kneel down, but his grip was too tight. “I’m not going anywhere.” Your fingers traced down the side of Logan’s face and gently forced him to look up at you. “I’m right here.”

With a hard tug, you were suddenly on your knees, with Logan pulling you into him. His lips crashed onto yours as one of his arms tightened, keeping your body against his as his other hand held the back of your head. Your hands found the back of Logan’s neck as he continued to kiss you so desperately, like you could disappear at any second. When the two of you finally pulled back for air, you still kept a hold on each other, with your foreheads meeting.

“You’re here…” He panted.

“I’m right here,” you repeated.

You figured that it would take a long while before Logan could truly wrap his head around that you weren’t dead. And you would do whatever he needed for him to believe that you were real.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he mumbled. “For everything… I shouldn’t have left you anywhere, the Danger Room, the Island. I should have protected you better. I should have—“

“James,” you stopped him with the mere call of his name. “I know you’re sorry… I am, too… We have a lot to work on, don’t we?” He nodded. “At least now we have more time.”

“I’m never letting you go again.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

~~~

Logan couldn’t let you go. His hands were constantly on you, arms around you. It's how you ended up staying the night at the nearby motel instead of heading back to the mansion. Logan wasn’t ready to bring reality back, especially if this was all some cruel dream. That also meant that after the sex you two had, Logan couldn’t get himself to fall asleep. His eyes were glued onto you, looking over your freshly healed skin, memorizing every detail of your face, enjoying the warmth that your body brought.

In the morning, the two of you headed back to the mansion, where Ororo was excited to see you, and Hank wanted to run tests. Logan didn’t like the idea of you being tested on, especially if he couldn’t be in the room. He nearly took Hank’s head off when Hank suggested that Logan wait outside. Hank allowed Logan to stay, but he was only allowed to hold your ankles. So Logan gripped tightly to both of your ankles, trying to ground himself as Hank ran tests on you.

“There is absolutely no reason for what happened to you,” Hank stated as you, Logan, and Ororo sat in the Professor’s office.

“Could it happen again?” You asked.

“Unfortunately, I can’t answer that.”

“So those tests were for nothing?” Logan’s voice was almost as tight as his grip on your knee.

“They weren’t for nothing,” you tried to calm him. “We just… don’t have any answers to any questions at the moment.”

“I’ve got to go,” Hank said. “But I will be checking in. Keep an eye out for anything strange, especially surrounding your mutation.”

“Thanks, Hank.”

“I’ll walk you out,” Ororo said, standing with Hank.

The two left, leaving you and Logan on the couch. You looked at Logan, who was clearly still struggling.

“What’s going on?” You whispered, placing a hand on top of the hand he had on top of your knee.

“Nothin’,” he muttered, shaking his head.

“Don’t… Don’t do that. Don’t shut me out. If we are going to get better—if we’re going to get through this, then you can’t shut me out. Or this isn’t going to work.” He pulled you into his lab, burying his head into the crook of your neck. “Talk to me, Logan.”

“I can’t—“ He cut himself off. “Sweetheart, I was so… I don’t even know… I felt emotions that I didn’t even know I could. I can’t… I can’t do that again… I can’t lose you.”

“I completely understand what you’re going through. You have to remember that I lost you at one point, too. I thought you were dead for years.”

“Shit. I forgot. I’m sorry—“

“Hold the spiral for a second. Your emotions are valid, no matter how long you felt them. All I’m saying is that I get it, and I’m here.”

“You’re here.”

You nodded, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “We’re going to get through this. It’s going to be long and hard, but we will.”

~~~

It had been a few weeks since your ‘rebirth’, as the students started to call it. The two of you were working on your relationship, barely teaching any classes to try and fix things.

Logan’s nightmares came back in full force. He kept trying not to fall asleep, wanting to keep watch over you, but his body won over every night. You would wake up to his cries, moans, and groans. You were familiar with the drill for how to avoid his claws and how to gently wake him. Logan always felt guilty, but you never allowed him to stay feeling that way.

Tonight’s nightmare was different from the rest. A new version of hell.

There you were, standing in front of him. It was a version of Alcatraz Island, only you were in Jean’s place and weren’t begging him to kill you. But before he knew it, his claws were in you.

Logan’s eyes snapped open as he sat up with a roar. His eyes weren’t focusing, though he could tell that someone was in front of him.

“Lo—Logan.”

Your voice snapped him out of his trance. His eyes widened as he took in the sight in front of him. You were kneeling between his legs with both his fists up against your stomach, blood seeping out.

“Oh, God!” He exclaimed.

“It’s okay, Logan,” you tried, words slurring together. “Just slowly pull out your claws.”

“What have I done? What did I—“

“Focus here, James. Focus on me.” You were growing weak and dizzy. His eyes searched your face for any sign of anger or fear, but he could only see love and concern. “Slowly, pull them out. But keep your eyes on me.”

With great care, Logan slowly pulled one of his fists away from your abdomen. His claws disappeared, allowing him to pull you closer as he repeated the action with his other hand. You fell forward with a small gasp. Logan quickly helped you lie down. With trembling hands, he lifted your shirt up. Your skin was mending itself slowly, leaving drying blood and scars in its wake.

“I’m so sorry,” you could barely hear the words spill out of Logan’s mouth due to how soft he was speaking. His hands were hovering over your abdomen, not knowing what to do. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“Logan, ssshhhhh,” you gently grabbed his hands. “I’m alright. I’m healing.”

“I hurt you… I hurt you…”

“It was just a dream, Logan. I shouldn’t have got between your legs. I knew that it could be dangerous.”

“My claws… I hurt you…”

“I’m fine.” You placed his hands over the newly formed scars.

“I gave you scars…” He yanked his hands back and stumbled off the bed. “I… I can’t…”

You sat up. “Logan, don’t run. Please. Stay. Work this out with me.”

“I… I’m going to my room tonight. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Logan! Please!” You reached out as he opened the door. “Don’t run.”

He paused, gripping the doorknob tightly. “I hurt you…”

“You’ll hurt me even worse if you walk out that door.” Tears were collecting at the edges of your eyes. “Please, James, stay.”

Letting out a shaky breath, Logan slowly closed the door, staying in the room. “I’m sleeping in the chair.”

“Okay.”

You watched as he almost robotically moved towards the chair next to the window. Before Logan could sit down, his eyes found the drying blood on your abdomen. He disappeared into the bathroom for a moment before returning with a damp washcloth. He knelt on the bed next to you.

“May I?” Logan quietly asked.

You simply nodded in response. He hesitated for a moment before beginning to gently wipe away the blood. Once Logan was done, you grabbed his wrist before he could get off the bed.

“Don’t leave,” you whispered, finally letting some tears slip. “I… I need you to hold me.”

“I can’t,” he shook his head.

“You won’t hurt me, Logan.”

“You don’t know that.”

Logan pulled his wrist from your grip and went into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. He closed his eyes and leaned against the door as he heard you try to muffle your oncoming sobs. After a few long, agonizing moments, Logan finally couldn’t handle it anymore. He opened the door and took wide strides over to you. You were curled on your side, facing away from him. He quickly got on the bed and pulled you back into him.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

You turned around and buried yourself into him, continuing to cry. Logan pressed a kiss to your head. This was hard for him, not running. But he couldn’t live without you, that was for sure. And he knew that you couldn’t live without him.

Chapter Text

“So, how are you and Logan doing?” Ororo asked one morning at breakfast.

“Fine,” you responded with a shrug. “We have a lot of work to do, but we’re working through it.”

“He does seem a little more on edge around the kids, as do you.”

You sighed. “I’ve actually been thinking… I think Logan and I should go away for a while.”

“Wait, you two want to leave?”

“I haven’t brought it up to Logan yet, and it wouldn’t be forever… we just need a space where we can focus on just the two of us. We’re constantly thrown every which way with classes, missions, and world-ending scenarios. Logan and I need to simply be us for a while and figure out what that means.”

“I… do whatever you have to do.” Ororo stood up. “I’ve got a class to teach.”

“Ororo, please stay and talk.”

But she slipped out of the room. You sighed, hiding your head in your hands. That was the position Logan found you in. He quietly came up behind you and rested your hands on your shoulders. He leaned down and kissed the back of your neck.

“What’s wrong?” He whispered against your neck.

You leaned back into him, looking up at him. “I made Ororo upset.”

“What did you do?” You sighed, looking back down. “Hey.” He sat down beside you. “I thought we were doing better with the talking shit.” He hooked a finger under your chin and guided your face to look at him. “Tell me.”

“I told Ororo about something I was going to talk to you about.”

“And that was…?”

“About leaving.”

“Leaving?”

“I was thinking that we need some time to ourselves. To figure things out and just be us.”

“But this is your home. Would you really be okay leaving it?”

“Logan, you’re my home. And you were long before this was.”

Logan studied your gaze and could see that you were telling the truth, but he worried that after a while, he wouldn’t be enough. You at least had people here, other mutants, to lean on when the two of you were struggling. If it’s just you and him? Then you’d have no one. Logan was okay with that for himself but not for you.

“I thought that we’ve been doing well here,” Logan said, trying to see if he could get you to change your mind.

His words took you back. “You want to stay? You’re constantly trying to run.”

“I just want you to really think about it, sweetheart. I don’t want you to leave and then regret it.”

“You think that I’d regret being with you?”

“That’s not what I said—“

You pulled away, standing up. “But it’s what you meant, right?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth.” He stood up as well, growing angry.

“Do you not want this long-term, Logan? Am I just your person until a new, better one comes along?”

“Hey! That’s not fair!”

“Morning! Oh—“ Bobby stopped in the doorway. “I can see that this is not a good time, so I—“

“No, Bobby, we’re done here,” you told him, rushing off.

“Y/N!” Logan yelled after you, hurrying to follow you. He followed you into the gardens. “Now, who’s running?!”

“Oh, please,” you spun around. “You’ve wanted to run since the moment you got here!”

“Yes, but I stayed for you!”

“Oh, I feel so honored.”

“You know what, maybe I should go. Since it’s clear that I’m unable to hit the high expectations you have set for me.”

“You are the reason for those high expectations.”

“Ugh! I’m not that person anymore! And I’m sick and tired of feeling like shit all the time about that!”

Logan’s hand flew out as he was talking, his claws accidentally unsheathing. Before either of you knew it, the claws were cutting against your cheek. You gasped, stumbling back as your hand came up to hold your cheek.

“Oh my God,” he sputtered. He hid his claws before reaching for you. “Sweetheart—“ You stepped back, breaking both of your hearts. Logan’s fingers were tingling. If you didn’t let him try to fix this—if you didn’t let him touch you, Logan would never trust himself to touch someone again. “Please let me—“

“No,” you shook your head, tears falling down your cheeks. “Just… leave me alone.”

You rushed off back into the mansion. You knew that Logan didn’t mean to hurt you, but you needed time and space.

Logan was frozen in his spot. The high emotions had gotten the best of both of you, but especially his claws. He had hurt you, and he was fully conscious for it. This was different than him having a nightmare. This was much worse.

~~~

You had sat in front of the mirror, watching the three cuts along your cheek heal into scars. Tears streamed down your face the entire time while you thought of Logan. Both of you were in the wrong here, and this was a complete accident. You were thinking about what to say to Logan when you started to hear drawers slamming in Logan’s room. Rushing out of your room, you looked into his room to see him stuffing his clothes into a bag.

“What are you doing?” You whispered.

Logan spun to face you. Slowly, his hand reached out to brush against the scars on your cheek, but he didn’t let his hand actually make contact.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” his voice was completely broken, tears lining his eyes. “I never wanted to be the one to hurt you… yet I keep doing it.” He shook his head and got back to packing. “I have to go.”

“What?”

“I can’t keep hurting you. I can’t be the person you need… The person I was before…”

“And this will make it better? I’ve messed up in this relationship, too. This is not just on you. I’m sorry for making it seem like I’m forcing you to be that person again. I know that you’ve changed, so I have, and that’s okay. I still love you.”

“You shouldn’t.”

“Stop that.” You slipped in between him and the dresser. He kept his head down, not willing to make eye contact. “Fine. Tell me you don't love me, and I’ll let you walk away. But you have to look me in the eye and be honest with me.”

You nibbled your bottom lip as you waited for Logan to make the next move. You could tell that there was a war waging in his mind. His eyes suddenly snapped to yours.

“I… I can’t do that,” he murmured. “I love you.”

You quickly pulled him by his shirt to kiss him. He dropped his bag and slid his hands to the small of your back.

“If you really want to leave,” you whispered against his lips, “then you have to take me with you.”

“Okay,” he replied.

~~~

“It’s not forever,” you said as you hugged Ororo. “We’ll stay in contact and visit. Logan and I just need to figure things out.”

“I’ll miss you,” Ororo responded, pulling back. “I’ll miss the both of you.”

“You ready?” Logan asked, coming up from the truck he had just packed.

He had already said goodbye to Marie and Bobby before packing the truck, knowing that you would need some time with Ororo.

“I think so,” you responded. “See you later, Ororo.”

“See you,” she replied.

You took Logan’s hand, and he led you to the truck. He opened the door and helped you in before going around to the driver’s seat. You turned back and watched as the mansion grew smaller and smaller in the distance. Logan placed a hand on your knee, giving it a slight squeeze.

“Are you okay?” He asked, clearly concerned. “We can turn back around.”

You laced your fingers through his and scooted closer to Logan, very thankful for the bench seat. “I’m okay,” you told him. You kissed his shoulder. “Where are we headed?”

“I have a place in mind.”

“Care to tell?”

“Not yet. Why don’t you get some rest?”

“You sure?”

He leaned over and kissed your head. “I’m sure.”

You hummed in content as you rested your head on his shoulder and let yourself relax. Logan’s lifted up in a barely-there smile as you tried your best to cuddle into him.

~~~

You didn’t bother to ask Logan where the two of you were headed again. You kept yourself occupied with books and naps when you weren’t talking to Logan. It was already proving to be worth it, as the farther the two of you drove from the mansion, the less tension there was. Logan insisted on driving the whole way, and so far you’ve had to beg him to stop to sleep in motels for the three nights you’ve been on the road so far.

It didn’t shock you when the two of you crossed over into Canada. You figured that Logan would always feel a call back there. The shock factor was later as the two of you drove up an old, familiar road in the Canadian Rockies.

“Logan, where—“

“Just patience, okay?” He cut you off. “I’ll explain soon.”

You simply nodded, focusing on the trees you were passing out the window. Your heart started pounding the closer you got to the top. Before you knew it, the small house appeared and Logan was pulling up to it. It looked just how you remembered it. You were too busy staring that you didn’t realize Logan had gotten out of the truck and walked around to your side. He opened the door and took your hand.

“Come on,” he urged, tugging you out of the truck. “Let’s go inside.”

“Inside?” You repeated. “It’s probably a disaster. We—“ Your eyes widened as Logan pulled you inside. The place was clean, updated, and furnished. “What? How?”

“Charles. We had a conversation about when Jean died, and I got part of my memories back. He knew that we would need a place to start over and found where we used to live. Before I could stop it, he had people here fixing it up.”

You let go of his hand and began slowly walking around the house. Your hands gently trailed against the walls and updated pieces of furniture.

“You and Charles…” you breathed out. “You did all this?”

“Is it okay?” Logan was clearly nervous. “We can go somewhere else. I just know that this was the—“ You shut him up with a kiss.

“This is perfect. Thank you. But know that I don't expect you to be the same person as before. Time has changed both of us… are you okay with being here?”

“Yes. I even already got a job as a lumberjack.”

“Oh, got the old job back?”

Logan chuckled. “Somethin’ like that. I start in a week.”

“So I have a week of you all to myself?”

“A whole week.” He pulled you closer, pressing a kiss to your lips.

“Can we try out the new bed?”

A devious smirk formed over Logan’s lips. “I thought you’d never ask.”

Chapter Text

You were awake before Logan, allowing you to stare at his beautiful body. The two of you had had a wonderful week, just focusing on the two of you. You only left the house to go into town and get supplies. It was nice in town. No one knew who you were, as it had been a long time. Logan didn’t hate going to town either. He constantly had an arm around you or his hand in yours. And if someone looked at you a way he didn’t like, he made sure they knew you belonged to him by pulling you in for a kiss.

Logan started work today. You didn’t want him to work, finding out that Charles had set you both up with a nice chunk of money. But Logan insisted that it would allow him to get his needed anger out on the trees and that the two of you would do better if you weren’t around each other constantly. You hated to admit that he had a point.

“Stop starin’,” Logan muttered, slowly waking up.

“Can’t help it,” you smirked, kissing his shoulder.

“Yeah, well,” he opened his eyes and turned to face you. “Two can play at this game.”

You laughed. “It’s not a game, Logan.”

“It could be.” He pulled you into him, kissing your forehead. “I need to get up.”

“No… stay.”

He chuckled. “We’ve talked about this, sweetheart. I’m only working part-time, a few hours five days a week.”

“Still… I…”

“I know you’re nervous. I am, too… the last time we had a morning like this, in this house—“

“Victor basically killed me.”

“Yeah, well, that’s not gonna happen. I promise.” He kissed your lips softly, like he could seal the promise. “We have a plan. You’re not leaving the house. You’ll call me if anything goes wrong.”

“Okay.”

“Hey.” Logan could tell that you were growing nervous. “It’s alright. I won’t be long.”

“Mhm,” you nodded.

“Come on,” He flipped the covers off of the two of you and pulled you off of the bed with him. “Help me get ready.”

~~~

“Before you go, I need you to take these,” you said, pulling the dog tags from around your neck and placing them around his. “I’ll keep yours still, but I need others to understand that you’re mine.”

“Marking your territory?” He smirked.

“Something like that.” You pulled him in for a kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

Logan kissed you again before driving off. You stood at the door, watching as he disappeared down the mountain. Taking a few deep breaths, you tried to calm the anxiousness that began to build inside of you.

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” you whispered to yourself.

You slipped back into the house and tried to busy yourself with unpacking more. With each minute that passed, you grew shakier, and your skin grew hotter. You had to stop touching anything due to the fact that you had started setting everything on fire. Eventually, you ended up standing in the middle of the house, staring at the phone on the counter. You knew that you could call Logan, and he would drop everything to come running, but you didn’t want to ruin his first day. A few tears sizzled down your cheeks as you came to the conclusion to just handle it yourself. You’d be fine. This was just a one-time thing, right?

~~~

Logan actually enjoyed his first day of work. It was nice to feel normal once again, and chopping wood allowed him to clear his mind. Logan did feel bad for leaving you, though, so he swung by a flower shop in town before heading home. He was excited to get home to you and spend the rest of the day holding you. As soon as he entered the house, Logan could sense that something was off.

“Y/N?” He called, taking off his boots and jacket. “Sweetheart?’

“In here!” You called.

He followed your voice and found you curled up in the corner of the couch,, book in your lap. His lips lifted into a smile as he came up behind you and leaned over, going in for a kiss. You laughed into the kiss. Logan broke from your lips and began peppering kisses over your face.

“I take it the first day was good?” You laughed.

“Mhm,” he hummed, giving the top of your head a kiss before jumping over the couch to sit beside you. He pulled you into his lap, nuzzling his nose into your face. “I brought you flowers.”

“You did?”

“Mhm.” He handed them to you.

“They’re beautiful.”

“Glad you like them,” he kissed your temple. “How was your day, sweetheart?”

“It was… good.”

His brows furrowed as he pulled back to see you better. “Why don't I believe you?”

“I don’t know.” You shrugged. You pushed the book open and tried to read it.

“Nu-uh.” Logan grabbed the book and tossed it onto the coffee table nearby. “Don’t ignore this… don’t ignore me.”

“Seriously, Logan, it was fine. I’m fine.”

“Are you?”

“Logan…” You moved to push yourself off of Logan, but he quickly held tighter.

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” He kissed behind your ear. “I believe you.”

You nodded. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Okay.” You kissed his cheek. “I’m going to get something started. Go clean up and meet me in the kitchen.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

He pulled you in for a quick peck before the two of you stood up together. You smiled at him before slipping into the nearby kitchen. Logan watched knowingly. Something was going on with you, but you weren’t willing to admit it yet. The two of you had moved here to work on your communication skills and other aspects of your relationship, though it was clear it would still be a long road.

Logan was quick to clean up and join you in the kitchen. He could tell that you were relaxing the more he was near you. The two of you teased each other as you worked together to cook dinner. After dinner, the two of you cuddled on the couch, reading until Logan began distracting you. The two of you ended up in bed, ravishing each other’s bodies.

~~~

That became a repeat for the next few weeks. Logan would go to work, and you would panic alone. Logan would come home, knowing that something was wrong, but swiftly distract you with something he got you from town. It was annoying you that you couldn’t fight off the anxiousness of being alone, especially as the weeks wore on. You knew that no one would take you away or kill you. No one knew where you were or who you were. But the old memories haunted you. You’d barely been near the cliff where Logan had buried you, and Stryker had dug you up. It was all so much, though you truly wanted to be there.

“I have a long shift today, remember?” Logan said as the two of you walked to the door. “I won’t be home until late.”

“Right,” you murmured, looking down.

“Hey.” Logan hooked a finger under your chin and guided your head to look at him. “I can stay home if you need me.”

“No, I’m fine.” You shook your head and gave his lips a peck. “I’ll have dinner ready for whenever you arrive tonight.”

“Love you.” He captured your lips for another kiss before heading to the truck.

“Love you.”

You watched until Logan had completely disappeared before heading back into the house. Today, the anxiety seemed to hit you worse for no good reason. As soon as the door was shut, your hands were trembling, and sparks were shooting from your fingertips. Your legs buckled beneath you as you began to gasp for breath.

You needed Logan. You need to fess up and tell him the truth. You just had to get to the phone and hopefully not burn it when you did. Your trembling body wouldn’t allow you to stand, so you were forced to crawl, burning a path in the wood. With a shaky hand, you reached up onto the counter and knocked down the phone. As quickly as you could, you typed in Logan’s number. It rang once before Logan answered.

“Miss me already?” Logan joked but quickly stopped when he picked up on your labored breaths. “Sweetheart? What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry,” you cried. You could hear the truck's tires as Logan turned it around. “I should have told you… I should have been honest…”

“I’m on my way back, baby. Stay with me.” It’s like he could see that you were going to lose consciousness. “Breathe, Y/N.”

“I’m—I’m… trying…”

“I know you are. I’ll be right there. Okay?” Your body gave into the darkness. “Y/N?! Shit!”

Logan drove speedily up the mountain, trying to get back to you. As soon as he could, Logan was out of the truck and racing inside. The air smelt of your smoke and Logan noticed the burnt trail into the wood. He followed it to where your body lay near the kitchen. There were small flames littered around you.

Despite the heat of your body, Logan grabbed you from the floor and hurried you to the bathroom. He needed to wake you and cool you down. Flipping the shower on, Logan stepped inside, not caring that the two of you still had clothes on.

“Come on, sweetheart,” he muttered, trying to cool you down. “Wake up.”

You groaned, slowly coming back to. “Lo… Logan?”

“I’m here.”

“Are… are we in the shower? Oh no! Did I set something on fire?”

“It’s fine. You stopped.”

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… I should have told you from the beginning.”

“Yes, you should have. But I’m not mad at you. I’m just glad you finally told me.”

You nodded, wincing as some harsh water hit your eyes. “Do you think we could continue this conversation out of the shower?”

Logan chuckled. “Okay.”

~~~

After that day, you and Logan tried to never keep a secret that important from each other. Logan slowly helped you with your anxiety, making sure you had a routine to follow when he wasn’t home. When he was home, he made sure to be fully home with you. The two of you shared the chores, though most of the time Logan was trying to get you to rest and not worry about it.

Both you and Logan continued to have the occasional nightmares, but neither of you was bothered by the other’s nightmares. The two of you did what needed to be done to comfort the other.

Your relationship still had its hardships, but you and Logan worked hard on your relationship. Life became nice, almost easy in a way. There was a steady routine throughout your life that you learned to enjoy.

One day, years after you left the mansion, Logan came home late from work. He quietly entered the house and found you working away on dinner in the kitchen. A small smile took over his features as he came over and slipped his arms around you. You jumped slightly, letting out a squeak of surprise as Logan held a kiss to the side of your head.

“Hey, you,” you greeted with a smile, relaxing into him.

“Hey, you,” he repeated. The two of you moved your heads to meet for a kiss.

“How was work?”

“Good.”

“Good.”

You pecked his lips again before focusing back on dinner. Logan sighed, resting his head against yours as he remained wrapped around you while you worked. Logan was simply amazed with you and felt like he was the luckiest man in the world.

“Marry me.”

It was a soft statement, not a question. It had you freezing in your spot. Logan gently guided you around to face him.

“Marry me,” he repeated.

You looked at him. All you could see was his seriousness and his unconditional love for you.

“Okay,” you breathed out.

“Okay?” He repeated, trying to make sure that you were sure.

“I’ll marry you.”

“Yeah?”

“You gonna question all my responses?” You laughed. “Or are you going to kiss me already?”

Logan’s lips attacked yours before you could tease him again. He quickly pulled you into him and away from the stove. His hands snaked down your hips to your legs and gripped onto your thighs. Without breaking from your lips, Logan lifted you up and turned around, setting you on the island.

“Logan,” you breathed out as he began to trail kisses down your neck. “I’m making dinner…”

With quick movements, Logan shut off the stove. “Dinner can wait.”

~~~

The two of you cuddled naked in bed after showing each other how much you love each other. Logan’s hands gently moved up your neck and slipped his dog tags off.

“What are you doing?” You asked quietly.

“Gettin’ your ring,” he mumbled, focusing on opening the chain.

You watched as Logan carefully took the ring off of the chain before he placed it back around your neck. Then Logan took your left hand and pressed a kiss to the back of your hand. Slowly, he slipped the ring onto your finger.

“You still good with this ring?” He asked, genuinely worried.

“Logan,” you moved your hand to caress his cheek. “This ring will always be perfect.”

“You sure? I can always—“

“James.” You pecked his lips. “I love it… I love you.”

“I love you, too.” You two shared another kiss.

“Logan, I…”

“What, sweetheart?”

“I don’t really want to deal with planning a wedding… I don’t want to worry about anyone coming or decorations. We should just go to the courthouse.”

“Mhm,” he hummed. “What about private vows right here, right now?”

“But I don’t have a ring for you.”

Logan chuckled. “Baby, I can’t wear a ring. My claws won’t allow it.”

“Oh, yeah…”

“Your dog tags will be my ring.”

“Alright… what should we promise each other?”

“Well, I know what I’d promise you… Been thinking about it a lot, actually.”

“Tell me.”

Logan turned to the side and opened the drawer of the bedside table. He pulled out a piece of paper before helping you sit up with him against the headboard. You felt like you could cry as the paper trembled slightly in Logan’s hands. He had written his thoughts—his feelings down. That wasn’t like him at all.

“Okay,” he breathed out, eyes focused on the paper before him. “Y/N… I never thought I’d experience something like this in my long lifetime. Let alone twice with the same person… I’m not good with words, but I made a list of promises that I intend to keep… I promise to be your partner in all things. I promise to protect you with my life. I promise to be by your side. I promise to love you with a fierceness that rivals me on the battlefield. I promise to embrace every moment with you, cherish our shared experiences, and find joy together. I promise to be your Logan, your James, your Wolverine until the end of my days. But I promise that the title I will wear the post proudly is that of your husband.” Logan looked up at you, eyes shining with love and tears. “I love you so much, sweetheart.”

You responded by leaning in and kissing him, trying to pour your feelings into the kiss. He eagerly kissed back.

“I love you so much, Logan,” you whispered against his lips. “And I wish I was more prepared—“

“You don’t need to be, sweetheart. As long as you’re here, that’s all I need.”

~~~

You and Logan didn’t care if your marriage was official or not. In your minds you were now husband and wife, which apparently led to more attraction to each other than before. Everything Logan did seemed to turn you on.

It was a Saturday in the fall, and Logan was chopping down a few nearby trees, wanting to make sure you had enough wood for the winter. You stood in the doorway of the house, leaning against it, nibbling away at your bottom lip. You couldn’t help but check Logan out. The way his muscles moved as he swung the ax. The way his white tank top was just a bit too tight, so it allowed you to see his abs through it. Logan’s skin glistened with sweat as he worked. You were sure that he could feel you staring, purposefully moving in certain directions to keep your attention.

Suddenly, you came up with an idea. You slipped into the house and put on a new set of lingerie you had bought recently and then put on one of Logan’s flannels, buttoning a few of the middle buttons up. As quietly as you could, you came up behind Logan.

“Hey, handsome,” you flirted.

“Hey, sweethe—“ Logan’s voice stopped as he took a second look to actually look at you. “What are you wearing?”

You shrugged, coming closer. “Looked comfy.”

He eyed the lace peeking out of the flannel as he set the ax down. “That’s not what I meant.”

You came up and ran a hand down his muscular arm. “You know… you’re a real good-looking lumberjack.”

“Yeah?” He smirked, brow raising.

Your hands slowly grazed up his arms until you could clasp them around his neck. “Oh yeah… like the hottest lumberjack around.”

Logan couldn’t help but chuckle as his arms came around to the small of your back. “Is that why you couldn’t take your eyes off me?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, biting your lip as he pulled you impossibly closer.

“Did my wife enjoy the show?” You whined at him calling you his wife. It always got to you, and he knew that. “Do you want me to continue?”

“No,” you rasped, shaking your head.

“Then tell your husband what you want.”

“I want to go to our bedroom.”

“And?”

“I want to have sex. Ah! Logan!” You were suddenly thrown over his shoulder.

“Took ya long enough, sweetheart. Do you think I was chopping wood for fun?”

~~~

It had been almost ten years since the two of you left the mansion and never looked back. Life had been a wonderful, amazing bubble. Full of love and laughter. And you knew, deep down, that sooner or later, someone would come around to pop that bubble.

Logan was at work, meaning that you were alone at the house. You were cleaning up the kitchen when a knock sounded at the door. You were immediately on edge. You quickly grabbed the phone and called Logan.

“Sweetheart?” He answered almost immediately, already knowing that something was wrong.

“Someone just knocked at the door,” you whispered.

“What?” You could hear rustling on his end. “I’m on my way back now.”

The knock sounded again. “Should I answer it?”

“No. Get to a place where they can’t see you. I’ll deal with it when I get there.”

“Okay, I—“ You spun around at the sound of your glass doors sliding open. A young woman waltzed in, sword on her back.

“Y/N?!” Logan began panicking over the phone. “Sweetheart?!”

“Who are you?” You asked the young woman as you slowly lowered the phone, and a fireball began forming in your free hand. “And what are you doing breaking into my house?”

“My name is Yukio, and I’m looking for the Wolverine.”

Chapter Text

Logan’s only thought was you as he sped from work to the house. Who would come up to the house? And why? Were you in danger now?

“Y/N!” Logan shouted as he sprinted from the truck into the house.

He came in prepared for a fight when he saw you standing in the middle of the living room with a young woman near the sliding glass doors. You had dropped the phone, and your fists were up in flames. He quickly stood in front of you, glaring down the intruder. Your hands cooled down and went to the back of his shirt, gripping it. You and Logan both knew that you could kick ass, but Logan would jump in front of you before that could happen.

“Who are you?” Logan growled.

“My name is Yukio,” she responded.

“And?”

“I’ve been trying to find you for over a year.”

“Why?”

“To give you this.” She removed the sword from her back, holding it out to Logan with both of her hands. “My employer wanted you to have it.”

“Who’s your employer?”

“Master Yashida.” You felt Logan tense beneath you. “He said it belongs to you and that he’s playing all debts. Master Yashida is dying. He wants to say thank you for saving his life all those years ago. He knows that you are a… busy man. But he very much wants to say his goodbye in person.”

“Alright, where is he?” Logan’s response surprised you.

“Tokyo.”

Logan scoffed. “I’m not going to Japan.”

“It would be dishonorable for you to refuse his request.”

“Well, apologize to Mr. Yashida. I’m not going to Tokyo. I have a life here. A wife.”

“Do not apologize. It’s been an honor just to meet the Wolverine.”

“That’s not who I am anymore, you understand?”

“Interesting since you’re standing in front of your wife, claws out… You are a soldier.”

“No, I’m not.”

“You are a soldier.”

“Not anymore!”

“You are a soldier, and you seek what all soldiers do.”

“And what’s that?”

“An honorable death. An end to your pain.”

“I’m not in pain anymore.”

“Logan,” you tugged on his shirt to gain his attention. “Maybe we should go.”

You had never heard of this Yashida fellow, but it clearly was bringing something out of Logan. Logan’s head snapped towards you at your suggestion.

“Why?” He asked.

“To say your goodbyes. If you saved his life once, if this man felt the need to send someone for you, it has to be important to him. You have to be important to him.”

Logan studied your eyes. He sighed, knowing that you wouldn’t drop this. “Fine.” He turned back to Yukio, sheathing his claws. “One day. I say goodbye to Mr. Yashida, and I come right back.”

“Okay,” she responded.

“I’m coming with you,” you stated.

“No,” Logan shook his head. “You’re staying here.”

“Yeah,” you scoffed. “Cause I’m safer here, by myself rather than with you, halfway across the world.”

Logan hated that you were right. “Fine. But you don’t leave my side.”

“Wouldn’t plan on it.”

~~~

Logan wasn’t happy at all to find out the flight would be at least fifteen hours long. It did help slightly that it was a private jet. But as soon as the plane took off, Logan was pulling you into his lap while he sat on the couch. Without a word, you let his head bury into your neck while your hands went to his hair. You gently began scratching his head, trying to ease his nerves. Logan closed his eyes and sighed as he allowed himself to just focus on you.

You could feel Yukio watching the two of you with inquisitive eyes. You ignored her and focused on Logan. His lips pressed against your neck a few times as he relaxed.

“I need to explain who Yashida is,” he muttered.

“Later,” you replied, pressing a kiss to his head. “We have a long flight ahead, and you need to calm down. I can feel your heartbeat.”

“Alright… What would I do without you?”

“Be a sad, lonely, miserable hermit.”

Logan chuckled against your neck. “Probably.”

It took quite a while before Logan got calm and sleepy. Logan eventually moved so that he was lying down with you on top of him. His arms stayed securely wrapped around you, for his comfort mostly. He quickly fell asleep with you in his arms. Yukio was curled up in a chair nearby, trying to sleep.

“We are almost there,” she said, keeping her eyes closed.

“So, you can see that future?” You asked. You had a feeling she was a mutant and wanted to know about her ability.

“I can read a map.”

“What’s your mutation then?”

“I can sense death.”

“Death?”

“It’s limited… but mostly accurate.”

“How far in advance?”

“Not too far.”

The plane rumbled, causing Logan to hold you tighter. “So, do we die on this plane?”

“No… Not on this plane.”

Her tone caught you. She knew something about when you or Logan would die. It was unsettling.

~~~

Logan woke up long before you but kept still to make sure that you got enough rest. You groaned as you began to wake up. Slowly, your eyes opened, and you looked up at Logan.

“Hi,” you rasped. His lips slightly lifted before he kissed your head. “Sleep well?”

“Only cause of you, my beautiful wife,” he whispered. Your stomach would never cease to flip at him calling you his wife.

Before the two of you knew it, the plane had landed and you were in a car being driven to see Mr. Yashida. Yukio was glued to her phone while Logan, who was sitting next to the window, had rolled it down and was staring out it. Yashida’s name was practically on every billboard.

“Master Yashida is not well tonight,” Yukio stated.

As you studied Logan, you could tell he was feeling indifferent about being here, but that there was something intriguing about seeing someone from an almost forgotten past.

The car pulled up to a large estate. There were armed men every few feet. Logan helped you out of the car and kept a tight grip on your hand as he surveyed the area and the two of you began to follow Yukio inside.

“A lot of guns,” Logan commented.

“There have been attacks,” explained Yukio. “Attempted kidnappings. Attempted assassinations.”

“By who?”

“The Japanese mob, the Yakuza. They’ve grown strong as the government has grown weak.”

Before you could enter the house, you and Logan were stopped. You were tugged away from Logan, causing him to let out a growl as the security guards scanned you with metal detectors. Logan’s immediately went off. Yukio began speaking in Japanese to the guards, trying to stop them.

“Hip replacement,” Logan stated, keeping his eyes on you.

The guards finally stopped and let you two enter. Logan’s hands were immediately on you.

“Wait here,” Yukio said, motioning to a nearby bench before disappearing.

The two of you sat down.

“I don’t like this,” Logan muttered, scanning the room. “We shouldn’t have come.”

“We don’t need to stay long,” you told him.

“I don’t know if the length of our stay is any choice of ours. You need to make sure to stay close.”

Two masked warriors fighting in what seemed to be a nearby training facility. Logan stood up and walked closer to study them. You joined him, wrapping your arms around him and resting your head on his back to try and get him to release some tension.

“Hey,” Yukio whispered, reappearing after having changed into a traditional outfit. “This way.

“Who’s that?” Logan asked.

“Shingen,” the man in question took off his mask, “Master Yashida’s son.” The two warriors continued fighting.

“He’s good.”

“He’s all right.”

Logan grabbed your hand and turned you both to follow alongside Yukio. He studied her change in attire.

“So, what happened to the badass in boots?” Logan wondered.

“Master Yashida is traditional,” Yukio explained. “One eye on the past and the other on the future.”

You stopped in front of two large doors. Yukio slowly opened open, revealing a room full of advanced medical technology. In the center, an old man lay on a bed with a young woman holding his hand.

“That’s Mariko,” Yukio told the two of you. “His granddaughter.”

Mariko shakily stood up, knocking items over as she headed for the door you were standing at. She glanced at you and Logan before pushing passed.

“Mariko!” Yukio called, going after the young woman.

“I sense that there’s a lot of drama here,” you muttered.

Logan grunted in response, squeezing your hand tighter. You watched as Mariko hugged Yukio and cried.

“Something’s wrong,” Logan mumbled.

Mariko walked away, leaving Yukio staring at her. Yukio sighed before turning back to the two of you. Walking over, she pushed the door further open and slipped into the room, you and Logan slowly following.

“Prepare two more suppressors for Master Yoshida,” a tall blonde woman ordered, talking to one of the assistants in there. “And check his blood pressure.”

Yukio was handed a mask and slipped it on. It wasn't surprising that neither of you were handed a mask since your healing abilities didn’t allow you to carry diseases. Yukio walked up to the man and began speaking in Japanese. Logan slowly led you around the bed, catching the eye of Yashida.

“Oh… Kuzuri,” Yashida said, bed moving so that he could sit up more. “You look the same. But, then, that is no surprise. Dr. Green?” The blonde woman turned to Yashida. “Leave us, please.”

“Fine minutes,” Dr. Green told you and Logan, “no more.”

“My oncologist.” Logan grunted with a nod in response. “And who is this?” Yashida motioned to you.

“This is Y/N,” Logan replied. “My wife.”

“This nice to meet you,” you told Yashida.

Yashida simply smiled at you briefly before Yukio brought over a drink for him. Logan began to study the room along with you. The two of you ended up turned around, facing a large painting.

“The painting is from the village of my birth,” Yashida explained.”It depicts the bravery and skill of the Black Clan. Ninja warriors. They served in my family for seven centuries. I didn’t send for you only to thank you, Logan. I wanted to repay you. To offer you something no one else can. A gift to equal the life you gave to me.”

“I don't need anything,” Logan responded.

“Not a thing. Eternity can be a curse. It hasn’t been easy for you, living without time. The losses you have had to suffer. A man can run out of things to live for. Lose his purpose. Become a ronin… a samurai without a master. I can end your eternity… Make you mortal.”

You now immediately regretted urging Logan to come. This man was up to no good, you could sense it, and by the way Logan stepped closer to you, you knew he could sense it, too.

“What they did to me, what I am, can’t be undone,” Logan told the man. “Besides, I have someone to live for.”

“Yashida Industries can do anything,” Yashida continued. “We have reason to believe your ability to heal can be passed.”

“Passed?”

“From you to another… You have struggled long enough, Logan.”

“I’m confused. I came here to say goodbye to a man I once knew.”

“I am the same man. I was not ready to die then. I am not ready to die now. But you are, aren't you?”

“Are you offering to kill me?”

“No. Not right away. You can live a long and ordinary life. Grow old with your wife. And one day, die an ordinary death. It can be done.”

You couldn’t hold back the laugh that bubbled up. “I’m sorry,” you said. “But you seem to have your research messed up. First of all, what you want to do is impossible. Second, I share Logan’s healing ability. He doesn’t have to worry about being alone. Not with me around.”

Logan let go of your hand and slipped an arm around your waist, pulling you closer. “Yeah, look, nice to see you again,” Logan said. “Sorry, you got sick.”

Yashida reached out and grabbed Logan’s free arm before Logan could guide you away. “Please, Logan-san. I need you again. I fear for my family. I fear for everything I have built.”

“Enough,” Dr. Green said upon reentering.

“Please, Logan-san."

“You two should leave.”

“They’re going to kill her.”

That caught your and Logan’s attention. “Who?” Logan asked.

“Mariko, my granddaughter. She is my treasure. She must be protected.”

“You don’t want what I’ve got.” Logan ripped his arm free and led you out of the room as the monitors began beeping.

“Kuzuri!” Yashida shouted.

You looked at Logan and could see that he was even more tense than before. You opened your mouth to say something, but you were cut off by the sounds of Mariko and her father, Shingen, shouting across the courtyard. Logan and you watched as they argued. Mariko stopped in front of her father, causing him to slap her. Logan took a step forward, ready to intervene. Shingen walked away, leaving Mariko. Within a split second, Mariko was running through the rain in the courtyard, and towards the edge of the cliff that the house sat on. Logan let you go and was running after her before anyone could stop him. Mariko got to the edge, but before she could jump, Logan’s arms wrapped around her and pulled her away.

“Careful, careful,” Logan warned as you and Yukio rushed up to the two. “It’s slippery out here.”

Mariko fought in his grip. “Let go,” she requested.

“You about done?”

“Let go of me.”

Logan did as she requested and watched as she slinked back to the house. Guards were waiting for her, ready to escort her to her room.

“Let me show you two to a room to get dry,” Yukio said.

You took ahold of Logan’s hand, and the two of you silently followed Yukio to a room. After the doors were shut and it was just the two of you, Logan pulled you into his chest and held you close. You didn’t waste a second, wrapping your arms around him in return.

“We shouldn’t have come,” he muttered. “There’s something very off here.”

“I can sense it, too,” you replied. “I’m sorry for—“

Your apology trailed off as his lips seized yours in a heated, demanding his. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours.

“Don’t apologize,” he whispered. “You were just hoping to help me.”

“Who is this man? And how did you save his life?”

Logan sighed, letting you go to sit on the edge of the bed. “I don’t remember every detail, but I know it was World War 2. I was in a prisoner of war camp here in Japan near Nagasaki. I saved him from the bombing.”

You came up to him, kneeling in front of Logan. “Makes sense why he would want to thank you, but… it’s clear he had other motives.”

“I would never let him do anything to me.” His hands moved to cup your face. “To you.”

Your lips lifted in a reassuring smile as your hands went to Logan’s wrists. “I know.”

“I got so lucky for a wife like you.”

“Not as lucky as I got for a husband like you.”

Logan smirked as he leaned in to capture your lips against his. The kiss was quickly cut off by Yukio entering. Logan growled as he noticed her and helped you up to sit on the bed.

“He just wanted to say goodbye, huh?” Logan scoffed.

He stood up and walked over to the bedside table that had fresh tea and picture frames on it. Your eyes were drawn to the pictures as Logan poured you both a cup.

“You two grew up together,” you stated.

“Yes,” Yukio responded.

“But you’re not sisters?” You shot Logan a smile as he handed you a cup. Both you and Logan drank the liquid as Yukio spoke.

“No. Master Yashida found me on a trip to the South. He brought Mariko to see a factory he was building. I was digging through the garbage for something to eat.”

“So they just took you home with them?” Logan asked.

“It was always difficult for Mariko to make friends… I’ll see to it the plane is ready in the morning. Sleep here.” Then Yukio left.

~~~

Your back was up against Logan’s bare chest as he held you close and slept. You were grateful that sleep was easy for him to find while it seemed to allude you. Your legs were growing restless the longer you couldn’t sleep. Deciding to get up, you gently took Logan’s hands from around your waist, pressed kisses to them, and slipped out of bed. You pulled on one of Logan’s jackets and slid out of the room.

You found yourself at the cliff in no time. You could see the city lights on the other side of the bay. This had been the most people you'd been around since leaving the mansion almost ten years ago. Guilt ate away at you. You and Logan had failed to keep in much contact with your friends at the mansion, too focused on yourselves. You made a mental note to reach out once the two of you were back at home.

So caught in your own head, you failed to notice Dr. Green stalking behind you, like a predator to its prey. With quick movements, she injected you with something, causing your vision to blur.

“Wh—What?” You slurred. “Logan…”

She turned you to face her, holding your head in her hands as your legs threatened to give out on you. You wished that you could see who was holding onto you, but whatever had been injected into was strong. Suddenly, an unfamiliar set of lips was on yours, and your jaw was being pulled open further. You struggled as something slipped down your throat. When you were finally let go, you fell to the ground in a fit of coughs.

“L—Log—Logan,” you tried to call out as you coughed. Before you could know if Logan was coming, your world went black.

~~~

Logan knew there was something wrong when he began to wake and the body curled up to him didn’t feel familiar. Before his eyes could snap open, lips were on his, and a hand was forcing his jaw to open more. Opening his eyes, Logan was met with green eyes that held the shape of a lizard’s. She hopped off him and slipped out of the room, leaving Logan gasping for air as green filled his breath. Still wheezing, Logan threw himself up, sitting on the edge of the bed with his claws ready to attack. His eyes frantically searched around for you.

“Y—Y/N,” he coughed. “Y/N!”

Logan stumbled out of the room and began to sniff, trying to get a lock on your scent. With his claws still out, Logan followed your scent to the cliff, where you were lying unconscious. His claws disappeared as he fell to his knees and pulled you into his chest. He felt little relief when his ears picked up the sound of your heartbeat. There was still the matter of how you got out here and if you were harmed in any way.

There was a lingering uncomfortable feeling in Logan’s chest as he picked you up and brought you back to the room. He laid you on the best, hands gently cradling your head.

“Y/N,” he whispered urgently. “Princess, wake up.” You groaned and he took that as a sign to continue prompting you awake. His thumbs rubbed against your cheeks. “Come on, wake up, sweetheart.”

“Lo… Logan?” You groaned, eyes slowly opening. There was still a fuzziness on the edge of your vision, but you could see Logan's worried face clear as day.

“Sweetheart,” he sighed, pressing a kiss to your head. “You had me so scared. What were you doing out there?”

“I…” you coughed lightly. “I couldn’t sleep, and I didn't want to wake you, so I went on a walk. But… someone attacked me.”

“We’re getting out of here. Now.”

He pulled you back into his arms and stood up. Logan froze as the two of you reached the door. Yashida’s workers were lining the halls as he was being pushed out. Cries and whimpers could be heard throughout the area. Yukio suddenly appeared in front of you two, tears in her eyes.

“He's dead,” she stated, growing more emotional. “I didn't foresee it.”

Chapter Text

There was no immediate leaving once Yashida was dead. There was a funeral to attend. Yukio was able to get you a black dress and get Logan black pants, a dress shirt, and a jacket. Whatever happened last night had clearly taken a lot out of you even Logan could see it. He had to help you dress. As he did so, he grew more and more concerned. Your skin’s temperature was still hotter than the average person, but it had cooled enough for Logan to notice.

“We need to get you home,” he muttered, guiding you to sit on the edge of the bed. He knelt down and helped you get your shoes on. “Your skin is cooler.”

“I’m sure it’s just remnants of whatever I was injected with last night,” you tried to brush it off, but you were growing concerned, too.

“Maybe we should call Hank.”

“He couldn’t do anything from here.” You took hold of Logan’s face, forcing him to look up at you. “We should take a trip to New York, though.”

“Yeah. After we recover from this trip.” He leaned up and brushed his lips against yours. “I’m worried about you, princess.”

“Well, try not to be. I’m fine.”

“Can’t help it. It’s kinda my job as your husband.” Your lips finally met up in a brief kiss. “Do not leave my side for any reason today… I can’t afford to lose you.”

“I’m not planning on going anywhere.”

~~~

The two of you rode with Yukio to the funeral. Logan kept you protectively close to his side, even once you arrived at where the funeral was being held. The area around the temple was crowded with onlookers and the press. Thankfully, security kept them at bay. You and Logan studied the area, noting how many armed guards there were.

As Logan helped you up the steps of the temple, you could hear heals behind you. Both of you glanced back to see Dr. Green slipping her sunglasses on and smirking at the two of you. Logan’s grip on you tightened. With another brief look back, you could see Dr. Green looking up at something on top of the next building. You looked and could see a man dressed in all black hiding on the nearby roof.

“I don’t think it’s safe here,” you whispered.

“Me either,” Logan murmured, on high alert.

You and Logan followed Yukio throw the temple and out to the back garden. You noticed Mariko near the front of the crowd, talking to other mourners. A man near her pulled her away from the conversation.

“Who's that?” You asked. “With Mariko.”

“His name is Noburo Mori,” Yukio answered. “Minister of Justice, a rising star. He’s Mariko’s fiancee. You need to bow.”

Yukio stopped in front of Shingen. You and Yukio bowed.

“Bow,” you whispered to Logan. Logan cleared his throat, clearly annoyed, and barely bowed.

“Lord Shingen,” Yukio greeted. “This is Mr. Logan and his wife.”

“I know who he is,” Shingen replied.

“Your father was a good man,” Logan said, trying to play the part of mourning.

Shingen scoffed. “He would often say the same about you. But then, he was always fascinated with your kind. Tell me, why do you think he sent our little Yukio to fetch you?”

“To say goodbye.”

“And now you have. Time for you to go back to your cave.”

You stepped forward, ready to argue with the man, but Logan easily held you back. Yukio led the two of you to the back of the crowd.

“Anyone else you want us to meet?” Logan asked, clearly frustrated.

Logan’s hand came up and loosened his tie a little. The feeling of being watched came over you, and you looked behind you. Dr. Green was a few feet away, staring at you and Logan. You turned back around.

“That armor belonged to Shiruba-Samurai,” Yukio pulled your attention to the armor near the front of the funeral. “The Silver Samurai. It will stand watch over the old man forever.”

“Stay with Yukio,” Logan suddenly told you.

“Logan,” you called as he pushed his way through the crowd and started following Mariko up the pathway.

“Hey,” Logan said, grabbed Mariko's wrist. She turned to look at him. “Something’s not right.”

“Let go,” Mariko responded, yanking her wrist free.

Mariko continued walking towards the memorial as one of the security guards began yelling at Logan in Japanese. Suddenly, one of the ceremonial men who had been walking with Mariko pulled out a gun and shot Logan in the stomach.

“Logan!” You screamed.

More armed men began attacking while the funeral attendees were screaming and running around. You watched as Logan fell to his knees, hand covering his wound. Something wasn’t right.

“Logan!” You shouted, you and Yukio trying to fight through the crowd to get to him. “Logan!”

The pain was searing through Logan. He hadn’t ever felt pain like this before. Everything around him was distorted and muted. He barely noticed Mariko being pulled away by one of the attackers. With a pained grunt, Logan stood up and unleashed his claws, fighting through the attackers to get to Mariko.

You and Yukio began fighting as well. Yukio grabbed a nearby bamboo staff and began to take down the attackers. You formed fire in your hands but quickly had to look at the fire. It wasn’t as hot or bright or big as it usually was and you were feeling your energy draining fast. You couldn’t let that stop you from fighting.

You began throwing fire at the attackers as you began to follow the sounds of Logan’s grunting. You knew he wouldn’t leave you here, but you knew it would be easier for him to reach you the closer you were to him. Failing to focus on behind you, you got shot through the upper part of your right arm. You screamed, the pain blinding.

“Y/N!” Logan yelled upon hearing your pained scream. He finished off the attackers he was working on and looked at Mariko, who was on the ground. His claws disappeared as he offered her his hand. “Let’s go. Come on, let's go!” Logan led her over to where you had collapsed onto your knees. “Y/N, sweetheart, I’m here.” He helped you up, causing you to whine and to him groan in pain. “Let's go.”

Logan helped you to where the cars were as Mariko followed closely. There was another set of attackers waiting to grab Mariko near the cars. Logan was forced to let go of you to be able to fight. You did your best to throw some fire at the attackers, but you were wheezing through the pain. A group of attackers grabbed you and threw you to the ground. Looking up, you saw Logan crouched down not too far away, being kicked and hit.

“Logan!" You cried, not for you but for him.

Logan’s eyes met yours, and both of you could clearly see the other person in pain. Neither of you was okay and was struggling to get to the other person. Before either of you could pull the energy to fight, the attackers near you both were taken down by arrows. Logan got to his feet and stumbled over to you. You could see the blood seeping through his black shirt as his eyes went to the blood rushing down your arm.

“We've got to go,” Logan said, straining as he helped you to your feet.

“We can’t just leave,” you panted. “Mariko is in trouble. She needs our help.”

“Let’s go.”

Logan caught sight of the direction that Mariko was running and began pulling you along with him. It didn’t take too long to catch up with Mariko and the three of you were running through the streets, avoiding the attackers still after Mariko.

“Come on. Let’s go,” Logan kept encouraging. “Let's go!”

Despite how much pain Logan was feeling, he knew he needed to get you and Mariko to safety. You were injured and not healing, just like he was. Neither of you would be able to figure out what was going on while being on the run like this. Logan guided you, and Mariko threw buildings and stalls, trying to lose the men after Mariko. Eventually, the three of you made your way to the train station. Logan was slowing down, wheezing through the pain. Mariko turned back to look at the two of you as you entered the station.

“You're bleeding,” Mariko stated. “You need help.”

“Just keep moving,” Logan grunted.

Finally, the three of you arrived on the train platform. Your hand found Logan’s back as he leaned forward, panting, as he slowed down to a stop.

“Thank you for what you did back there,” Mariko said.

“Those were Yakuza,” Logan panted.

“I’m fine.”

"Why are they after you?”

“I’m fine. I can make my way from here. You two should go. Get yourselves a doctor.”

Mariko scurried off, but Logan wasn’t about to let her get too far.

“Come on,” he urged, taking your hand and pulling you along.

Your vision was growing blurry as Logan found Mariko and helped you sit down in the row across from hers. He sat down beside you, quickly leaning his seat back.

“Whoa!” Logan exclaimed, feeling some relief in his abdomen. “That’s nice.”

Mariko turned and glared at the two of you. Logan reached over and leaned your seat down before putting the armrest between you up and pulling you closer. He could tell that you were struggling to stay alert. Glancing at you, it was clear you as been shot in your arm, leg, and side of your abdomen. Logan had only heard you scream once, so you most likely hadn’t put together that you were more injured than you thought.

“This is one of those bullet trains, right?” Logan asked Mariko.

“I told you I don't need your help,” she retorted.

“So what do they do, like, 300 miles an hour?” He pulled his attention back on you, brushing his lips against your head. “We’ll get somewhere safe, princess, I promise.” You moaned in response, trying to keep awake despite the pain you were in. “Where are we headed, Mariko? Where are we going?”

“I’m going to the end of the line. My family has a home in the South.”

Logan scoffed. “That’s stupid. No offense, but they’re gonna know to look for you there.”

“Not this place.”

“Look, you want to be left alone.”

“Yes.”

“I understand.”

“Do you?”

“Oh, yeah. Trust me. Problem is, if I do that, I don't think you’re gonna live to see the end of the day. You can’t pretend shit isn’t happening when it is, Mariko. Unless you want to die. In that case, you're playing this perfectly.”

Mariko slipped headphones in to ignore Logan. He leaned back with a groan. Why the hell weren’t the two of you healing? He looked over at you to see your eyes closed.

“Sweetheart,” he called gently. “I need you to keep your eyes open for me.”

“Mmm,” you hummed, barely opening your eyes.

“There you go. I know it hurts, but we’ll get help. Okay?”

“Logan… my fire… something’s wrong with it…”

“We’ll figure it out, I promise. Just stay awake.”

Logan pulled his tie off and tied it above the bullet wound on your arm, trying to stop the bleeding. He was more worried about you than he was about himself, as his healing ability was always stronger than yours. He needed to get these bullets out of him, and his wounds cleaned so that he could fully help you. Logan kissed your head, heart dropping as he noticed your temperature was continuing to cool down.

“I’ll be right back, honey,” he whispered. “I’m just running to the restroom. I won't be long.”

“Okay,” you muttered.

Logan limped off, and you couldn't help but close your eyes. You tried to stay conscious, though the darkness quickly won.

~~~

Logan did his best to clean up the blood and bullet wounds before stuffing his pockets with paper towels to use on you. He exited the restroom, only to be met with a group of attackers. Logan immediately began fighting the group, eventually leading him onto the roof of the bullet train. Logan fought until he won and limped back through the train. He went to Mariko first, who jumped at his sudden appearance in her ear.

“What happened to you?” He asked, pulling her headphones out.

“We get off here,” he panted. “Let's go.” He turned back to see you completely unconscious, breathing unevenly. With a grunt, Logan pulled you up into him and carried you out of the train. He was limping, but that didn't matter to him. You were his number one priority. “Just listen to me, will you?” Logan told Mariko as they reached the streets and after he had explained what happened on the train. “We need to find someplace safe.”

“I don't understand,” Mariko said. “How do you know they were Yakuza?”

“They were the same guys from the temple.”

“How do you know they were after me?”

“Look, we need to find someplace safe. We need to get off the streets.”

“I don’t understand—“

“Shut up! Listen! We need to get somewhere safe. Do you know this place? Where’s downtown?”

“Straight ahead.” Logan carried you as Mariko begrudgingly walked beside him.

“So, where's the nice part of town?”

“Another eight blocks that way.”

“Good,” he glanced around and saw a hotel. “We’re staying here. Let’s go.” Logan led Mariko into the hotel as he readjusted your position in his arms.

“This is a love hotel.”

“A what?”

“A love hotel. For couples, understand?”

“Uh… Right.” He gently set you down the the nearby bench before going to the front desk. “Hey. Uh, two rooms. Adjoining rooms, on the same floor.” The front desk attendant began speaking in Japanese. “Right next to each other. Very close.” The attendant kept arguing. “Same floor. Same floor.”

Logan sighed before Mariko walked up and started speaking to the attendant. Letting Mariko take care of it, he sat down on the floor beside you.

“What did she say?” Logan asked when Mariko came back over.

“She has no rooms available next to each other,” Mariko explained. "She's asking if we prefer the dungeon, the nurse's office, or the mission to Mars.”

~~~

“This’ll do,” Logan said as he took in the space-themed room. “Kinda of homey, actually. Take the bed.”

“Where do you plan on sleeping?” Mariko asked. “And what about your wife?”

“I don't plan on sleeping. Gotta take care of her wounds.”

Logan took you into the attached bathroom and placed you in the shower. His breathing was becoming just as uneven as yours, but he had to push through the pain. He needed you to wake. Gently, Logan pulled the dress off of you, allowing him to see the still bleeding wounds on your abdomen and leg. He took a towel and used one of his claws to cut it into strips. Logan tied the strips around your abdomen and leg, trying to stop the bleeding. He grabbed a washcloth and got it damp before he began to clean up the blood. You groaned as soon as the cloth hit the wound on your leg.

“It’s okay,” Logan spoke gently. “I’ve got you.”

“Lo…” You breathed out, slowly coming to.

“I’m right here, princess.” Your eyes slowly blinked open. He forced a small smile. “There you are. Was worried.”

“I’m sorry… I tried to stay awake.”

“I know.”

“What’s happening to me? To us? Why aren’t we healing?”

“Don’t know, darling. But we’ll figure it out. Gotta clean you up first. It might sting."

“Just do it.”

Logan quietly apologized every time a cry slipped through your lips. He was trying to be gentle and quick, doing his best not to cause you any more pain. Once you were cleaned up, Logan found a robe in the closet and slipped you into it.

“You’re still bleeding,” you noted as Logan finished tucking you into the bed he made of towels.

“I’m fine, darling,” Logan said. “I’ll be fine.”

“Sleep with me?”

“Can’t. Got to make sure we weren’t followed.” He leaned down and kissed the top of your head. “I’ll be back to check on you. Get some rest.”

Logan slipped out of the bathroom and outside onto the raining deck. He gripped the railing and leaned forward, panting. He could feel the blood running down his body and onto the deck, the rain washing it down the drain. Many of the bullets were still in him, but his focus needed to remain on you and Mariko. Slowly, his vision began to blur, and before he knew it, he was on the ground. The last thing he heard was your voice shouting his name.

Chapter Text

Sometimes, you forget how heavy Logan is. He carries the adamantium skeleton so easily, that now you and Mariko are trying to pick him up off the ground, you are reminded of the metal. The two of you ended up having to drag Logan back into the room.

“I’m going to get help!” Mariko exclaimed, rushing from the room.

You should have gone for Mariko’s safety, but right now, Logan was your priority. You wiped his face with your hands, trying to get the rain and hair away. The wounds in his abdomen were still bleeding heavily, letting you know that blood loss was probably the reason for his passing out. Ignoring your own pain, you began to take his layers off until his chest was bare.

Mariko returned with the front desk attendant and a young man. It took all four of you to get Logan down to the basement of the hotel, where the young man was running a small vet clinic. Mariko talked the young man into pulling the bullets from Logan's chest. You sat silently at Logan’s side, gripping tightly to his arm. Logan unconsciously fought as the young man stitched him up, mostly cutting you in the process. You wouldn't allow Logan to hurt anyone else. You could sense when his claws were coming and warned the others.

Mariko spoke in Japanese to the young man once Logan was all stitched up. The young man grabbed some supplies and came to your side.

“You need help, too,” Mariko stated.

“I’m fine," you said with a shake of your head.

“I’m sure your husband would not like it if he woke and you weren’t taken care of.”

You knew that Mariko was right. You let the young man work on you as you stayed at Logan's side. You were done getting stitched up when Logan came to.

“Logan,” you whispered as his eyes scanned the room. His eyes snapped to you, and he looked relieved.

“Y/N,” he rasped. Logan grunted as he pushed himself to sit up.

“You need to lay back down.”

“I’m fine,” he waved you off, staring at the two strangers.

“This is Mieko from the hotel,” Mariko introduced, “and her grandson, Hitoshi.”

“Is he a doctor?”

“In a manner of speaking, yes. He’s a veterinarian… student. Large animal.”

“Uh, thanks,” Logan reached out to shake the young man's hand. The young man scrambled back, not wanting to be near Logan’s hand. “Whoa.” He looked at you for an explanation.

“You may have let your claws loose a few times while he was stitching you,” you explained. Logan’s eyes fell to your arms where he would see the marks his claws left on you.

“Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,” the young man breathed out, trying to calm Logan down though there was no need.

Mariko spoke to the two in Japanese, letting Logan’s eyes fall on you. His hands carefully reached down and took your arms in his hands, thumb rubbing against your skin.

“Are you alright?” Logan asked.

“I’m fine, Logan,” you replied softly. “Just a little scratch.” You stood up and kissed the tip of his nose. “You had me so worried.”

Logan’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you to stand between his legs more. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.” He kissed your nose. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Getting me help.”

“It was mostly Mariko. I was a nervous wreck.”

He looked up at the other woman. “Thank you… I’ve never needed this before.”

“What? Help?” Mariko questioned.

“That doctor, the one who helped your grandfather, the blonde. Who is she?”

“He met her last year when he was in America for treatment.”

“Your grandfather told me my healing could be taken from me, passed on. I’m not getting better, not like before. Neither of us are. She did this to us.”

~~~

Mariko was still insisting on going South, and at this point, neither of you had any energy to argue with her. The three of you loaded onto a crowded bus. Mariko sat in front of you while you and Logan took the bench behind her. Both of you were exhausted. It didn’t take long for Logan to be leaning against the window, grunting as he slept, with his arm slung over you. You were leaning up against Logan, asleep as well.

The bus stopped harshly, causing you and Logan to jerk forward, waking up. Logan’s arm held you to him tighter while you both looked around. Mariko stood up and glanced back at the two of you.

“We get off here,” she said, heading off of the bus.

“Let’s go,” Logan grunted, helping you up to your feet as he stood.

You gripped Logan’s hand tightly as the two of you got off the bus and followed Mariko through the town.

“Where are we?” Logan wondered.

“Just outside Nagasaki,” Mariko replied.

Logan tensed as he took in the area.

“You okay?” you whispered.

“I'm fine,” he muttered, pulling you after Mariko.

The three of you stopped by a nearby market. Mariko chose all the groceries while Logan carried them all. That allowed you to take in the beautiful scenery.

After shopping, you followed Mariko through town to a small house. With every step you took, you could see Mariko release some of the stress of the last few days. It was nice to see her so carefree. Mariko went straight to work in the kitchen, allowing you and Logan to rest a little.

The bed was a mat on the floor meant for a single person, but that didn't matter to you or Logan. Logan laid down first, taking you with him. You were practically on top of him, facing him. Both of you fell asleep quickly.

Logan was the first one to wake. He kissed your head before carefully slipping out from underneath you and heading for the kitchen. A picture on a pinboard caught his eye. He took it off and held it in his hands.

“This is the guy from the funeral, the archer," Logan stated. “He was your boyfriend.”

“That’s Harada,” Mariko explained. “We were village champions that summer. He with the bow and me with the knives. Hard and I were planning to get married.”

“What stopped you?”

“Grandfather. He said we had to wait until we were at least 15… How did you and Y/N meet?”

“It's a long story.” A small smile formed on his lips at the thought of you, and he glanced back to see you still sound asleep.

“It’s clear that you two care greatly for each other.” Logan grunted in agreement. “Why don’t you go wake her? Dinner's ready.”

Logan nodded, turning back around to head to you. He knelt down with a small smile on his face. He leaned close to your face and began pressing kisses to your face, trying to ignore the fact that every time he touched you, your skin was noticeably cooler. Your lips pulled up as you moaned, pushing back into Logan.

“Time to wake up, princess,” he whispered. “Dinner’s ready.”

You turned to look up at him. It never ceased to amaze you at how beautiful Logan was. Your hand reached up and rested on his cheek, thumb rubbing against his stumbled cheek.

“Hi,” he whispered, grabbing your wrist and pressing a kiss to the palm of your hand.

“Hi,” you whispered back.

“How are you feeling?”

“Fine. You?”

“Fine.”

“I’m glad we both decided to lie to each other.”

“Cancels it out.” He leaned down and kissed your lips. “Come on.” He pulled you up. “Let’s go eat.”

Logan led you to the kitchen, where Mariko had already set the table and was sitting to eat. He helped you to the ground before joining you. Logan immediately grabbed the chopsticks and stuck them into the noodles before grabbing the spoon. Mariko was clearly displeased, reaching over and resting the chopsticks back on the table.

“Chopsticks upright are a bad omen," she explained. “It resembles incense at a funeral. Nothing is without meaning.”

“So, the other night at the house, when you, uh, ran out in the rain, what did that mean?” Logan asked before taking a spoonful of liquid.

“My grandfather was dying."

“You knew he was gonna die. He’d been sick for a long time.”

“Logan,” you scolded.

“What?”

“It’s alright,” Mariko said. “It wasn’t his death I feared."

“So, what, then? What did he tell you that night? Mariko, why did your father hit you?”

“I was trying to warn him.”

“About what? What did your grandfather tell you?”

“Seriously, Logan,” you cut in. “Let her eat.”

“No, you both deserve to know,” Mariko said, sighing. “He told me… that… in three days… when they read his will… I will become the most powerful person in Japan… He gave it all to me.”

“The company?” Logan clarified.

Mariko nodded. “I didn’t want it. He knew that. I don't understand why he gave it to me. It was all my father dreamed of."

“Well, that’s why. What about this fiancee of yours? Nostromo.”

“Noburo.”

“Does he know about this?”

“No.”

“Why are you marrying him? He seems like kind of an asshole.”

“And now I’m questioning why I married you,” you muttered, continuing to eat. You hadn’t realized how cold you had gotten until this warm food began filling a void.

“My father arranged it last year,” said Mariko. “It gives him a better access to the political theater. To disobey my father would be to dishonor him. I don't expect either of you to understand. You're not Japanese.”

“I’m sorry for all that you’re having to deal with Mariko.”

“Thank you, Y/N.”

“I’m also sorry for my husband here.” You reached over and patted his arm. “He hasn’t been socialized a whole lot in the last ten years.”

“Hey!” Logan exclaimed. “I’m not that bad.” You gave him a look that quickly got his shoulders slumping.

~~~

The next morning, you found Logan in the bathroom shaving. You leaned against the doorway, shamelessly watching him shave and watching the way his back muscles moved without a shirt on. Logan caught your eyes in the mirror and smirked.

“Like the show?” He taunted.

“Love it,” you replied before biting your lip.

You walked up and wrapped your arms around him, resting your head against his bare back. Logan gave your arms a squeeze before going back to shaving. It was moments like these that Logan loved the most. The simple, tender everyday moments that the two of you shared. He only wished that they were happening in the safety of your home. Your head lifted up as you heard someone calling for Mariko from outside. Logan immediately tensed, cleaning up quickly before leading you outside. The two of you stood at the door, watching Mariko speak to an older woman.

“A tree fell in the road,” Mariko stated as she headed back to the house. “They’re wondering if Logan can help.”

“Sure,” Logan answered, grabbing his tank top and pulling it over his head.

“Are you sure?" You asked. “You still haven’t healed.”

“Sweetheart, it’s just some wood and an ax. I do this every day for work.”

He kissed your head before taking your hand. Mariko guided the two of you to where the tree was. Logan was handed an ax and immediately got to work. A few of the kids swarmed you, speaking quickly in Japanese.

Mariko laughed. “They want to know if you can do any tricks,” she told you.

“Oh,” you said. “I think I have one or two up my sleeve.”

You held your hand out, palm up. You winced at the amount of energy it took to produce a small flame. Logan noticed immediately, having to stop himself before running towards you. There was nothing he could do about your dwindling powers, though he wished he could.

You smiled as the kids oohed and aahed at the small, dancing flame. They clapped as you closed your hand, forcing the flame to die. Logan’s lips lifted at the sight of you with the kids. You and Mariko distracted many of the kids while the men from the town and Logan worked to remove the tree from the road.

Mariko began walking down a path near the water after the tree had been fully removed. Logan was panting and dapping his head with a cloth. You looped your arm through his arm as you followed Logan.

“Do you need to sit?” You quietly asked, worried about him. He nodded, pulling you down with him to the nearby brick wall.

“Are you okay?” Mariko asked.

“Tired,” Logan panted.

“Do you need something?”

“No.”

Mariko stopped a nearby cart vendor, buying three apples from him. She tossed two of them to you and Logan, who caught yours for you. You rested your head against Logan’s shoulder as you both took bites of your apples.

“Thanks,” you told Mariko.

Looking around, something caught Logan’s eye. He stood up, eyes on the archway not too far away, and began walking there.

“Logan?” You called, you and Mariko following after him.

He walked past the archway to a metal circle in the walkway not too far from it. You watched curiously as he crouched down and placed a hand on the metal. Mariko stopped you before you could get too close.

“I was here… when it happened,” Logan stood up and said. “It’s how I met Yashida… We hid in there.”

“I heard the stories,” Mariko said. “My grandfather would say, ‘what happened here was proof that everything in the world finds peace… eventually’… that man can recover from anything. Maybe you, too.” Mariko’s eyes glanced at the sky. “We should go back. There's rain coming.” She turned away.

You reached over and grabbed Logan’s hand. “Are you okay?” You asked.

“I will be,” he replied. “Once we get this taken care of and get you feeling better.”

“You need to heal, too, Logan.”

“I saw that flame, Y/N. I can feel your warmth leaving. Something is not just preventing you from healing, but preventing you from using your mutation.”

“I’ll be fine—“

“What if it kills you? What if you get too cold—“

“Logan, Logan, hey,” you grabbed his face. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Logan's lips captured yours in a fierce kiss. You could taste the desperation and fear as he tried to pull you impossibly closer.

“We need to get back to the house,” he whispered against your lips. “I need to feel you… need to get you warmed up.”

You nodded. “Okay.”

~~~

Logan did what he could to feel you and keep you warmed up long into the night. He needed to show you how much he needed you and to remind himself that you were still with him despite the fact that his mind was convinced you were fading away. He woke up before you did, heart immediately dropping. You were much colder than you had been before he had worked so hard to warm you up. Logan immediately pulled you into him and tugged the blanket over you both.

“Logan?” You mumbled against his chest, being woken up by something so unfamiliar.

“Sshhh, sweetheart,” he cooed, holding you tighter.

“Logan... I’m cold."

Logan’s heart sank. In all the time he had known you, you had never admitted to being cold. It just meant that something was very wrong. “I know, honey, I know. I’m going to warm you up, keep you warm, alright?”

“Logan!” Mariko’s scream came from outside. “LOGAN!”

“Go,” you urged. “I’ll stay here in the blankets.”

“But—“

“LOGAN!” Mariko screamed again.

“Go!” You yelled, rolling off of him.

With hesitancy in his eyes, Logan got up and ran out, following Mariko’s screams. Your movements were slow as you put clothes on and buried yourself beneath the blankets. Logan was limping upon his return, and Yukio was with him. With a pained grunt, Logan picked you and the blankets up. He carried you to Yukio’s car, getting you situated in the back seat before he took the front passenger seat and Yukio took the driver's side.

“Take us to Noburo,” Logan demanded.

“Logan,” Yukio said.

“Take me to him.”

“I need to tell you something.”

"Do it. Now!”

Without another word, Yukio sped off.

~~~

“Wait in the car with Y/N," Logan ordered once Yukio pulled up to the building.

“Logan,” Yukio called.

“What?”

“I saw you die.”

“What?!”

“I saw you die.”

“When? Just now?"

“A while ago. But it’s not like I get a complete picture. more like looking through a keyhole. But I’m always right. All I can see is one part of a person's life... their death. And I saw yours… and Y/N’s.”

“What?” You gasped from the back, still curled up for warmth.

“What did you see?” Asked Logan.

“I saw you on your back. There’s blood everywhere. You’re holding your own heart in your hand. It’s not beating.”

“What about Y/N’s?”

“Her chest was cut open… blood was everywhere—

“I don’t have time for this shit.”

“When I was five, I knew how my own parents would die. Then I watched it happen from the back seat.”

“Look at me. A lot of people have tried to kill me, and I’m still here. Y/N’s still here. ”

“Yeah, but you’re different now, aren't you? They can hurt you. They can kill you.”

“Just wait in the car with Y/N.”

Logan slammed the car door as he left and slipped into the building. Yukio anxiously tapped the steering wheel as you waited for Logan.

“Yukio?” You called. “Did you see anything else with my death?”

“Logan’s claws… Logan’s hands… they were covered in your blood,” she responded.

“He can’t know that.”

“Y/N—“

“You can't tell him. Especially if I die by his hands. He will never touch me again. He will run. You cannot tell him the rest of what you saw.”

“Okay.”

~~~

When Logan returned to the car, he informed you and Yukio that Shingen had ordered the hit on Mariko. Yukio drove as fast as she could to Yashida’s house. Upon arrival, Logan helped you out, and the three of you headed into the house.

“Where is the security?” Yukio wondered.

“Shingen!” Logan called.

Logan kept a hold of your hand as the three of you made your way towards the medical room. The lights were on in the room, but all the screens were off.

“Logan,” Yukio called.

You and Logan went over to see what Yukio was looking at on the floor. There was a dead security man with a picture stabbed into his chest. On the page, there was a building and a bloody note: come and get her. Logan reached down and ripped off the page.

“This. This here," Logan pointed to the building. “Where is this?”

“Master Yashida’s birthplace,” Yukio said, moving over to the large painting on the opposite wall. She pinned the picture to the painting. “The company built a facility into the mountainside.”

“How far?”

“500 kilometers from here.”

Looking around, Logan noticed that something was missing from two of the large glass containers. He dropped your hand and went over to the medical bed. He grabbed the remote and turned on the machines. With a grunt, he lay down and let the machine scan over him. You and Yukio watched as the scans revealed a large, spider-like thing wrapped around Logan’s heart. Logan looked down at his chest and ripped his shirt off.

“Logan,” you called, coming over to his side. “What are you doing?”

“I gotta get that thing out of me,” he murmured.

“How?”

“No, stop, Logan,” begged Yukio. “I saw you die! I’m never wrong. I’m never wrong!”

“You’re not always right,” Logan retorted. “You didn’t know the old man was gonna bite it.”

“I saw you die in a room like this with your heart in your hand.”

“I’m the only chance Mariko’s got, but not with that thing inside me.”

“You’re going to die, Logan," you cried, gripping onto his arm.

His free arm raised, with his middle claw poking out of his fist. Logan looked at you, his eyes trying to say everything he wished he could. “Kiss me.” You didn't waste a second, pressing your lips to his. “I love you, sweetheart. No matter what. I love you.”

A few tears escaped your eyes. “I love you, too.”

Before either of you could say anything else, Logan used his claw to cut open his chest. Yukio pulled you back.

“You’re not gonna want to watch this part,” Logan groaned. He suddenly stuffed his hand into the large cut.

“Logan!” You shouted, fighting Yukio’s grip as he pressed his hand further into himself.

He groaned and cried out in pain, making you cry more. You shrieked as the glass wall behind you suddenly gave way. An armored Shingen stepped in, sword ready to fight.

“Move!” Shingen ordered as Yukio jumped in front of you and Logan.

“Stay away from him!” Yukio shouted.

“He killed your master. Put hands on your sister. And now you want him?”

Shingen pushed the scanner away, preventing Logan from seeing where his hand was going. Yukio jumped over Logan to keep Shingen away. You stood at Logan’s side as Yukio and Shingen began fighting. Suddenly, Logan gasped. His bloody hand retreated from his chest, the robotic spider writhing in his hand. Logan continued to groan, struggling for breath.

“Logan!” You cried, trying to get him to focus on you. “Logan!”

“Y—Y/N,” he stammered, eyes struggling to focus on you. The machines made a long, droning beeping sound, and Logan’s eyes rolled back into his head.

“No! Logan!”

Logan’s arm gave way, falling to hang off of the bed. Tears freely rained down your face as Yukio and Shingen continued to fight around you. You tried to shake him awake, but Logan wouldn’t budge. Shingen kicked Yukio into a machine, knocking her out and causing his attention to turn to you. You barely missed the sword that he swung your way. You threw your hands to the side and tried to summon fire. Shingen chuckled as the flames in your hands appeared dim and fluttery.

“Weak,” he spat. “Can’t even form a flame without your Kuzuri.”

You grabbed a nearby sword that was hanging on the wall and tried to use it to defend yourself. But you were weak, Shingen was right. With one swift swing of his own sword, your sword was dropped, and you were stumbling back until you were on the ground. Shingen lifted up the sword to end you when his sword was suddenly caught in three metal claws.

“No one hurts my wife,” Logan growled.

Logan used his returned strength to fling Shingen across the room, away from you. Logan stalked forward with his claws out.

“Where’s Mariko?” Logan demanded.

“She’s gone,” Shingen responded. “That Viper bitch took her. It was my father’s obsession with mutation, with God's mistakes…” Logan easily deflected the swinging swords, "Like you and your wife, that ruined this house.”

Logan and Shingen pushed their fight into the hallway. Shingen’s sword caught Logan’s cheek, cutting it. Logan turned his head back to Shingen, showing the man how quickly it healed. The two swung their weapons at each other while Yukio rushed to your side.

“Are you alright?” She worried over you. She noticed how you were shaking. She placed her hands on your arms and felt how cold you were. “Logan!” She shouted over the clanging of mental.

“Lo—Logan,” your teeth clattered together. “I need… Logan…”

“I know, I know. Logan!” Yukio helped you up and got you onto the medical bed.

“Y/N!” Logan shouted as he rushed back into the room. He came to your side, hands shooting to carefully cradle your face. “Sweetheart, I’m here. I’m right here.” He looked at Yukio. “Get the machine back up!” Yukio nodded, quickly getting to work, allowing Logan to focus back on you. “We’re going to see what’s wrong, princess. We’re going to see what we can do.”

“I was so scared,” you rasped.

“I know," he pressed a kiss to your head, “I know. I’m sorry.”

“It’s ready,” Yukio stated.

Logan stepped away from you, allowing the machine to scan your body. Just as Logan thought, you had a machine robotic spider wrapped around your heart.

“You need to cut it out of me,” you said.

“No!" Logan retorted, back at your side. “We don't know if you'll survive. Your abilities are different than mine.”

“There’s no time, Logan. You have to try.”

“No!” Yukio cut in. “I saw you die too. Logan had your blood all over your hands.”

“Logan didn't stay dead. And… I’ve died before.”

“I don't know if you’ll survive,” Logan said, shaking his head, tears shimmering in his eyes. “I can’t—I won’t.”

“Logan,” you grabbed his hands, “it’s got to go. I’m dying with it inside of me… I trust you… I trust you…”

“I… I can’t lose you.”

“I almost just lost you. We can call it even.”

“What if you die for good this time?”

"Then you save Mariko and go back to New York. Back to our friends.”

“Not without you.”

“Logan—“

“No!”

You let your eyes find Yukio. “Do not let him be alone if I don't make it.”

“I promise,” Yukio whispered.

Your focus went back to Logan. You reached up and brought his head down for a searing kiss. “I love you. Don’t forget it.”

“I can’t do this,” Logan whispered, allowing himself to cry. “I can’t hurt you.”

“You’re not hurting me. You’re saving me… James, please, I trust you.”

“I love you.”

“So save me.”

Logan stood up and pushed out one of his claws. Tears streamed down his face as he took a deep breath. Your eyes kept a lock on his eyes. He needed to know you weren’t mad at him. That this wasn’t his fault. Suddenly, Logan began cutting into your chest. You screamed out in pain.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” Logan cried. “I’m so sorry. I’m going to fix it. I’m going to save you.” As soon as the cut was big enough, Logan pushed his hand inside of you. You gasped as you began to struggle for breath. “Stay with me, princess… Stay with me.”

Logan gripped the robot and ripped it out of you. You lurched up with a gasp before going limp. The monitors beside you signaled that you weren’t breathing. Logan tossed the intruder away and pulled you into his arms.

“Come back to me,” he sobbed. “I got it out… Come back to me.”

“Logan…” Yukio whispered after Logan sobbed and rocked you for a few minutes. She rested her hand against his bare back. “We should go.”

“No!” Logan jerked away from Yukio. “I can’t leave her! Not when this is my fault…”

“Logan—“

“No!” Logan buried his head into your neck as your body remained limp in his arms. “I’m so sorry, honey… I failed you… I’m so sorry…”

“We can come back for her. No one will disturb her body here… She’s safe.”

Logan knew that Yukio was right. Besides, you wanted him to save Mariko. He would be letting you down more if he didn’t. He pressed a light kiss to your unresponsive lips before holding one to your forehead. Slowly, he set you back down on the bed.

“I will come back for you,” he whispered. “I promise.”

It took a lot of strength for Logan to turn around and leave you there. Yukio followed close behind. He clenched his fists as Yukio drove them off, looking back at the house until he couldn’t. Barely missing the sight of smoke rising from the house.

Chapter Text

You gasped as you woke up naked on the medical bed you had died on. Looking around, you could tell that you were alone. Meaning that Logan had followed through with going to save Mariko, which was what you had asked of him. You were honestly surprised that you had risen from the dead again, but you couldn't waste any more time. You needed to get to Logan.

You quickly found some clothes to wear and the location of Yashida’s birthplace. Thankfully, rich people always had a few cars lying around, and you were off. Racing to get to Logan before he did anything incredibly stupid.

~~~

Logan’s anger was fueling him forward. He needed to rescue Mariko and finish off Dr. Green. He needed to get his revenge for you. When Logan arrived at the town, he was met with Harada, waiting in the streets for him. Logan could sense that there were others nearby, hiding in the shadows.

“I see you’ve come to fight,” Harada stated, coming towards Logan. “It’s pointless. You’re outnumbered. The Black Clan has protected the House of Yashida for 700 years.”

The Black Clan began emerging from the shadows, from the alleys and the rooftops.

“Is that all the men you brought?” Logan challenged. “I’m going to get to Mariko.”

“We are grateful for your protection of Mariko. But there is one more sacrifice you must make for her family.”

“Go fuck yourself, pretty boy.”

Harada yelled, and the fighting began. It didn’t take long for the other Black Clan members to jump down and join, with more continuing to appear on the rooftops. Hard ordered them to begin firing arrows as Logan started to run through the streets. Logan got halfway through town before the arrows began to have heavy wires attached. Logan grunted as he tried to continue on despite the resistance of the wires. He groaned as a poisoned arrow hit the middle of his back. His vision began to blur, but Logan continued to move forward. The Black Clan continued to shoot wired arrows into his back until Logan collapsed face-first into the snow.

~~~

You followed the tracks of a fight in the snow once you reached the town. Your heart clenched at the sight of the clear marks of someone being dragged. You knew it had to be Logan. You continued to follow the tracks, slipping into the large house on the hill. With your powers fully restored, it was easy to take down the Black Clan members in your way. Eventually, you reached the center of the building, revealing to be a large, open lab spanning the whole building.

Glancing down, you saw Logan locked up in some machine that kept his hands facing outward. You could see him moving slightly and groaning like he was waking up. With a sudden tug, you could see Logan trying to free himself. Slowly and quietly, you began to sneak down.

“Stand back," Dr. Green ordered the nearby Black Clan members as she waltzed up. “There is no need.”

“Where’s Mariko?” Logan demanded. “Where is she?”

“Are you pinning for someone who is not your wife? For shame. Where is your wife anyway?” Logan simply growled. “Did she not make it? Too weak?”

“Shut the fuck up!”

Dr. Green smirked before looking away at the giant samurai nearby. “Impressive, no? He is made of adamantium, just like you.” Logan continued to try to break free. “Oh, Logan, you know what, I get it. You’re frustrated.”

She pressed some buttons, moving the machine that Logan was stuck in forward. The machine pulled his arms forward, away from his body. Logan kept heaving breaths as the machine kept him still, drilling into him and inflicting pain.

“I know Mariko is here,” Logan panted. “I want to see her.”

"You want answers,” Dr. Green stated.

“Yes, I want answers!”

“I’m sorry, I wish I could say more, but I was hired in part for my discretion.” Dr. Green leaned forward, up against the machine, taunting Logan.

“I’m sure you were."

“That and a certain talent for combining biochemistry and metaphysics. High-grade toxins are my specialty. It helps to be genetically immune to every poison known to man, as I am. And immune to the toxin of man himself… as I am.”

“I’ll tell you what, you twisted mutant bitch, why don’t you open these bracelets, and we'll see who’s made of what?” Logan released his claws. Almost as soon as he did, the machine clamped down further around his fists, preventing his claws from retracting.

“The claws,” Dr. Green smiled. "Now we can begin. The suppressant bug you found inside of you and your wife was mine. You took it out on your own. I didn’t see that coming. Did you take your wife's out, too? Is that why she’s not here?”

“You don’t deserve to talk about her!”

“You are strong. You have courage. Real courage. But that won’t help much now.”

The giant metal samurai ripped itself free from the wires it was connected to. It stomped over to Logan, going around him, before stopping in front. You arrived on the same floor they were on in time to see the giant samurai pull a huge sword out and line it up with Logan’s claws. Your eyes widened as you noticed the sword heat up as it lifted. You rushed over and threw yourself between Logan and the samurai.

“Stop!” You shouted.

The samurai lost its concentration, hitting the back of the machine Logan was in, throwing you, Logan, and Dr. Green around while the samurai fell back. Logan grunted as he landed on his knees.

“Y/N!” He yelled.

You looked up and over at him, shooting him a smile. “Hey, handsome,” you breathed out. “Miss me?”

Logan opened his mouth to say something, but before he could, he noticed the samurai getting back up. Slamming the leftover wrist clamp against the stairs, it came clattering off. He ran over to you and grabbed your hand, tugging you up harshly to stumble against his chest. His lips quickly captured yours for a brief kiss.

“You gotta stop doing that, sweetheart,” he whispered.

“Gotta keep you on your toes somehow, honey,” you replied with a smirk.

He smirked back. “You’re gonna be the death of me.” The samurai stomping closer caused Logan to start to drag you in the opposite direction. “Run! Go!”

You and Logan ran side-by-side. You noticed Dr. Green rushing to cut you off. You threw your hands out, launching her over the railing and down a few floors in a ball of flames. Harada and Mariko rushed out of a room a few floors up.

“Go!” Logan urged, waving them off. “Run!”

The two of you began running down the stairs. The giant samurai jumped down to the level you had reached. Logan let out a roar as he flung himself at the samurai, causing himself and the samurai to fall down a few levels.

“Logan!” You screamed, looking over the railing to see him squaring up with the samurai.

You spun around and tried to take the stairs two at a time to get to Logan. You could hear him groaning, straining to keep the samurai’s sword still as he used his claws as a shield. You reached the floor in time to see the samurai pull out a second sword that was quickly heating up. Using the railing, you launched yourself onto the back of the samurai and took hold of the heated sword with one of your hands. You focused on heating the sword up further, causing it to begin to lose its shape. It dropped the melting sword and reached back. It grabbed you and threw you over the railing.

“Y/N!” Logan roared.

You cried out in pain as you harshly landed a few floors down. You could hear Logan and the samurai fighting for a few moments before you heard a thud close by. Logan was quickly kneeling beside you, checking you over.

“Are you okay?” He asked, eyes still frantically searching you over. He carefully helped you sit up.

“Honestly, I’m ready to go home,” you responded.

He let out a hearty chuckle. “Me, too, darling.”

The samurai dropped down onto the level the two of you were on. Logan pulled you up and dragged you over to the electrical boxes. Using his claws, he ruined the boxes, turning off most of the lights in the building. You and Logan quietly hid behind nearby posts as the samurai searched for the two of you. The samurai passed the two of you, allowing Logan to jump on its back and retrieve another sword it had.

“Y/N!” Logan shouted.

He tossed you the sword, and you caught it. Holding it with both hands, you began to heat it up. The samurai spun around, kicking Logan down, allowing you to cut the head off the samurai. Logan launched himself at the samurai again, forcing him and the metal monster down to the bottom floor. The samurai slammed against the wall, breaking a hole into it that Logan was launched through.

“Logan!” You yelled.

You ran down the flights of stairs as Logan climbed back into the building. You dropped to your knees in front of him, the two of you quickly wrapping your arms around each other. In a blink of an eye, the samurai grabbed your ankles and tore you from Logan’s grasp.

“No!” Logan shouted, hands barely brushing against your arms as you’re torn out of reach.

The samurai spun you around and grasped onto your hands. The metal clamped against your wrists, and three drills from each of the metal hands appeared and began drilling into your fists, right into your bones. You screamed out in pain.

“Let her go!” Logan demanded.

The middle of the samurai opened up to reveal Yashida.

“Logan-san,” he greeted. “Don't look so shocked. With you at my side, I survived Nagasaki. Surely, I could survive this.” You let out another scream as the drills pushed further into you. “It’s alright. It won’t take long.”

“What are you doing to her?!” Logan didn't know what move to make without hurting you.

“Dr. Green and I have been waiting. It’s only this armor that's kept me alive. We built it to make me strong so I can take what you would not give. And transfer your unwanted healing to my body. It’s only by mere coincidence that your wife could also provide what you would not give. My legacy must be preserved. Your mistake was to believe that a life without end can have no meaning. It is the only life that can.”

Logan was watching as the life slowly drained from your body. You were growing older while Yashida was growing younger. He couldn’t get his eyes to look away from you. He couldn’t force himself to move.

“Logan!” Yukio shouted, throwing one of the large swords in his direction.

Logan caught it, gripping it with both hands, causing it to heat up. He stood up and, with a shout, threw the sword into Yashida’s head. The metal hands retracted the drills and let you go. Logan caught you before you could collapse onto the ground. Yashida stumbled back, gasping for breath, before falling out of the building to his death.

“Sweetheart,” Logan shook you, trying to get you to gain consciousness. “Wake up… I really can’t handle this again… I need you to wake up.” Yukio slowly came over, watching the scene. “Come on, honey.”

The only hope Logan had was the fact that you were still breathing. You had to wake up. Yukio placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder.

“We need to get her some medical attention,” Yukio said.

Logan nodded, hoisting you further up into his arms before standing up. Yukio led the way out, where Mariko and Harada were waiting safely.

“Logan! Y/N!” Mariko exclaimed, rushing towards Logan. “Oh my gosh!” Mariko looked you over, immediately seeing your increase in age. “We need to get her to a hospital.”

“No,” Logan pulled you closer. “Too dangerous.”

“Logan, I have my grandfather’s business under my control. I have resources. The two of you have helped me so much. Please let me return the favor.”

“Mariko can help,” Harada agreed.

Logan scoffed. “Not really caring for your word right now, bub,” he muttered.

“Trust me,” Mariko pressed. “I won’t let any happen to either of you anymore.”

~~~

Logan snarled at anyone who tried to pry you from his arms the moment Mariko had the group escorted to a private wing of a nearby hospital. Yukio and Mariko had to work together to coax him into setting you on the bed. He insisted on staying near you the entire time.

The doctor Mariko had called in specialized in mutants, giving Logan hope and making him even more cautious. Logan’s eyes created a rotation going from your rising chest, your face, to the monitors and back. He wanted to know everything and not miss a second of anything. He stood on the edge of every room you were brought into, like a constant guarding shadow. Mariko and Yukio took turns trying to get Logan to rest, but he couldn’t leave you.

It took a few hours for the doctor to get any results from the tests they had run. The doctor informed the group that you were slowly healing and de-aging. They said that you’d be fine in a day or two and would most likely sleep the entire time. The doctor encouraged the group to keep you there until you woke up, and Logan reluctantly agreed.

“There's one other thing,” the doctor added, after updating the group. “I talked to Dr. McCoy on the phone, and he informed me of the incident that happened ten years ago when Y/N returned from the dead like a Phoenix.”

“What about it?” Logan asked.

“Was that the only time?”

“No. She did it about a day ago.”

“That would explain what we saw in the blood we took.”

Logan took a protective step closer. “What did you see, doc?”

“Mr. Howlett, your wife is a powerful mutant, but when she rises from the dead like that, it sucks away at some of her abilities. The tests we ran and compared to previous tests that Dr. McCoy had run, show that her mutation is slowly decaying.”

“Are you saying that she’s dying?”

“Not exactly. She could still live another hundred years as long as she is careful. The more she rises from the dead, the faster her mutation will decay, meaning the faster—“

“She’ll die… Can she use the other parts of her mutant?”

“Of course. But I would be wary of bringing her into any more life-threatening situations. I have sent our findings to Dr. McCoy for his records, and so that he can keep track of Y/N himself.”

Logan clenched his jaw as he stared at you, processing the information. Mariko stepped forward and placed a hand on Logan’s back.

“Thank you, Doctor,” Mariko said.

“Of course,” the doctor replied. “I’ll be around if there’s anything you need.”

The doctor left as Logan walked over to your bedside. You were slowly returning to the woman he knew. But, even if you hadn’t, Logan would have loved you anyway.

“I need to take her home,” Logan murmured.

“I’ll have the plane ready for as soon as she wakes,” Mariko said.

“No,” Logan shook his head. “I need to get her home now.”

“Logan—“

“I appreciate what you’ve done. But it’s my duty to take care of her and the best way I can manage that is at home.”

“If you’re sure.” Logan nodded, causing Mariko to sigh. “I’ll go make the calls.”

Mariko left to go to as she said. Logan gently took your hand and lifted it up, pressing a kiss to the back of it.

“We’re going home, sweetheart,” Logan whispered. “And we’ll never leave again.”

~~~

You needed to move, but you were trapped. The familiar weight of Logan’s arms around your waist was comforting, with his head resting on your shoulder. But you felt like you hadn’t moved in days; your muscles were stiff. As you slowly opened your eyes, you quickly realized that you were no longer in Japan. You were home. Logan’s head was on your shoulder, with his arms around you, keeping you against his bare chest. You lifted your arm and began scratching Logan’s arm. He groaned as he began to wake.

“Sweetheart?” He mumbled into your neck.

“It’s me,” you whispered.

Logan’s head lifted to fully look at you as his arms tightened around you. “You have to stop worrying me… I can’t take anymore.”

“I'm sorry. I’ll try hard not to.” Logan leaned down and kissed you softly. “When did we get home?”

“Last night. The doctor cleared you, and I wanted you home.”

You reached up and cupped Logan’s cheek. You could tell that the concern was still lingering. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

“I know, darling.” Logan grabbed your wrist and turned his head to kiss the palm of his hand. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

Logan then explained what the doctor had found out about your ability to rise from the dead. You could feel Logan trembling as he spoke, like he was finally letting all his concerns out. Once he was finished, you pulled him to lay on top of you. Logan was careful not to fully put his whole weight on you but appreciated you holding him.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you quietly promised Logan.

“No more danger,” Logan muttered. “No more missions.” He pulled back enough to allow your eyes to meet. “I need you safe. I need you here.”

“I won’t promise that unless you can promise the same thing… I can't lose you either.”

“I’m not the one with the habit of dying.”

“I promise I don't try to.”

“I know, sweetheart… Alright, no missions. No danger. For either of us.” He leaned down and gave you a brief kiss. “I never asked, how are you feeling?”

You smiled up at him. “I’m fine.”

“You sure?”

“I’ll let you know if it changes, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I do have one thing, though.”

“Anything.”

“Can we stay in bed all day?”

Logan gave a hardy laugh as he wrapped you in his arms and rolled over so you were on top of him. “Sounds like a plan, sweetheart.”

Chapter Text

To say Logan was nervous was an understatement. First off, he hated flying. Second of all, he had never planned a trip like this before, let alone by himself. You had been pestering him for years about going on a vacation, a true vacation, but he always found an excuse to brush it off. Now that your anniversary was nearing, Logan wanted to do something special for the two of you. Logan was going to surprise you with a ten day trip to Hawaii. He had rented a small house with a private beach for the week, just the two of you. He could only hope that you’d like it.

It was a Saturday, so Logan wasn’t working. You had slipped out to run some errands by yourself , allowing Logan to prepare how he was going to tell you about the trip. He had bought a new swimsuit for you, something he hoped you would like in his favorite color to see you in. He placed it in a bag and set it on the counter.

Anxious about the present, Logan waited for you outside, keeping himself busy with chopping wood and working on his bike. When his ears picked up the sound of the truck, Logan quickly set the tools down and wiped his hands clean on his jeans before standing to meet you.

You smiled as you caught sight of Logan waiting for you outside. You parked the truck and Logan was there in no time, opening your door.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted, leaning forward and meeting your lips for a brief kiss.

“Hey, honey,” you replied. “You been waiting for me?”

“Maybe.” He smirked. “What can I grab?”

“Everything’s in the back seat.”

“I’ll grab everything. You head inside.”

“Are you sure? I can–”

“Go. I can handle a few grocery bags.”

You kissed his cheek before heading inside. It didn’t take you long to notice the gift bag sitting on the counter. “Uh, Logan? What’s with the bag?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he responded, coming in with all the grocery bags.

“So you won’t mind me taking a look inside then?”

He shrugged. “Nope.”

With curious eyes, you peeked into the bag and pulled out the new swimsuit. You held it up, studying it, before peeking back into the bag. There was nothing else in it.

“Thanks, honey,” you said, trying to mask the utter confusion you were feeling. “I needed a new swimsuit?”

“Fuck, I didn’t think this all the way through,” he muttered.

“What is going on, Logan?”

He sighed, running a frustrated hand up his face and through his hair. “I’m taking you to Hawaii.”

The swimsuit dropped to the ground. “What?”

“Tomorrow. You and me. Hawaii.”

“You–You’re serious?”

“Very.”

You squealed and jumped up into Logan’s arms. He caught you with a laugh as your arms wrapped around his neck and your legs wrapped around his torso.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

Logan pressed a kiss to your neck. “You’re welcome, sweetheart.”

You pulled your head away enough to look at him. “Are you sure you can handle it? I know how you feel about flying and not to mention the water. Do you–”

Logan shut you up with a kiss. “Your reaction sealed the deal, baby. I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“I’m the one who planned it, didn’t I?”

“Yes, but–”

“Nope. We’re going.”

You squealed again, going back to hugging him tightly. “I love you so much!”

He chuckled in your grip. “I love you more.”

~~~

Logan knew he had made the right choice as he watched you bounce around the airport. He couldn’t help but watch you with a loving smile. You were so excited that it was becoming contagious. It was helping but his anxieties at ease, especially since he had a few more surprises up his sleeves once you two reached Hawaii.

“Oh, Logan! Let’s–”

He quickly grabbed your hand and pulled you into him. “No more stops, sweetheart. We haven’t even gone through security yet. We can explore more once we’re past that.”

“Oh. Right. Let’s go!”

Logan laughed as you tried to tug him along. He willingly followed you to the security line. To distract himself from the oncoming pat down he would be forced to have, he wrapped you up in his arms and held your back against his chest. He also needed to make sure you didn’t happily wander off before you hit security. You leaned back into him, completely content with him holding you still as you waited in line.

“Are you guys newly weds?” A kind old lady asked as she stood behind you in line, watching you and Logan.

“No,” you responded with a smile. “We’ve been married for a few years now and have been together for even longer.”

“Well, it’s nice to see two young people such as yourselves so happily in love still.”

You and Logan had to bite back a laugh. If only this woman knew that Logan was 183 and you were 85. You were probably older than the woman herself.

“Thank you, ma’am,” Logan responded. “I got lucky.” He kissed your temple as you melted into him.

The lady smiled and looked at you. “You’ve got yourself a keeper there, dearie.”

You patted Logan’s arm that was around you. “Yes, I do,” you replied before meeting his lips for a kiss.

When you reached the security checkpoint, you gave Logan another kiss.

“I’ll be right in front of you,” you told him, knowing that he hated situations like this.

“Okay,” he responded, sneaking another brief kiss before he let you go.

He watched as you walked through the checkpoint with ease before turning around to wait for him. You shot him a smile as he stepped toward the TSA agent.

“I’ll take the pat down,” Logan stated.

The agent turned to his colleagues, “opt out.”

Suddenly, the coins and all other metal objects around begin to shake and float up. You and Logan are seemingly the only ones who seem to notice. You gasp as you realize who is standing behind Logan. Seeing your concern, Logan draws out his claws and spins around but was stopped before he could do any harm.

“What do you want?!” Logan asked as Magneto lifted his head.

Without even thinking, you rushed back through the scanner and place yourself between Logan and Magneto, flames ready in your hands.

“There are dark forces, Wolverine, Ember,” Magneto responded, still holding a grip on Logan. “Human forces, building a weapon that could bring about the end of our kind. What I want… I want your help.”

“Why would we trust you?” You asked.

“You wouldn’t.”

Slowly, Magneto released Logan, causing Logan to pull you back behind him. It’s then you noticed that everyone in the airport had stopped moving. Logan tensed as he held onto you and stepped through the scanner. Your brows furrowed as you noticed the look on his face.

“What is it?” you whispered.

“A wheelchair,” he breathed out.

You followed his line of sight to see Charles weaving through the crowd of frozen people. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Charles stopped his wheelchair a few feet away from you and Logan, with Magneto remaining behind you.

“Hello, Y/N, Logan,” Charles greeted.

“How is this possible?” Logan asked, stunned.

“As I told you a long time ago, you’re not the only one with gifts.”

~~~

The X-Men jet was an unwanted familiarity as you and Logan stepped into it. Charles had promised to explain everything as soon as you reached the mansion. Magento and Charles let the two of you have your space in the back of the jet as you flew to your old home.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered to Logan.

He was completely confused as to why you were apologizing. “What are you apologizin’ for?”

“You worked so hard to plan a vacation and now we don’t even get to experience it.”

Logan pulled you into his lap and used his hand to keep you looking at him. “It’s not your fault. I’m the one who should be apologizing. Should have taken you on a vacation long ago.”

You sighed, resting your head in the crook of his neck. “Should have known that we’d get pulled back into this eventually.”

“We can say no.”

“You know we can’t… not when Charles is back.”

Logan sighed, kissing your head. “No matter what happens, we stick together.”

“Always.”

~~~

Ororo was hugging you before you could fully step off of the jet. You quickly hugged back, tears pricking at your eyes. You had missed her so much.

“You never called,” she rasped, growing emotional.

“I’m so sorry,” you replied. “Forgive me?”

“Of course.”

When the two of you finally pulled away, Logan was swept into a hug from Ororo and Marie was on you. The hugs continued through Colossus, Bobby, and Kitty, each excited to see you and Logan.

“Hold up!” Marie exclaimed, grabbing your left hand and holding it up. “Did you two get married?!”

“Yes,” you responded.

“And none of us were invited?”

The room quieted down immediately, with everyone’s eyes on you and Logan. Sensing your emotions being to grow, Logan placed a hand around you and pulled you back into him for comfort.

“Technically, it’s not legal,” Logan responded. “But it’s real to us.”

“I’m very happy for you both,” Charles said with a smile, trying to ease the tension.

You couldn’t stop looking between Ororo and Marie, both clearly heartbroken about the lack of an invitation or an update. It had been twelve years since you had last seen or talked to any of them. You basically cut off communication as soon as you left.

“I think we need to all rest and regroup in the morning,” Charles suggested.

Magneto scoffed. “We’re wasting time,” he argued.

“Not enough to make a difference.” Charles rolled in front of you and gently took your hand. “We can talk later. Your room is cleaned and ready for you and Logan.”

“Thanks,” Logan replied, sensing that you were about to break down. “I’ll come back for our bags.”

Logan was practically carrying you as the two of you left the hangar, everyone watching. You couldn’t fully take in the idea of being back here, feeling too guilty for leaving your friends in the dust. You froze once you were inside of your room. It didn’t feel like home the way it once did and it hurt with the familiarity of it.

“Sweetheart,” Logan whispered, trying to get your attention elsewhere.

“Can you go grab the bags?” You murmured.

“Those can wait. You need–”

“Please, Logan… I just need a few minutes.”

Logan sighed. He knew that it wasn’t worth arguing with you in this state. “Okay. I’ll be quick.”

You nodded, still focused on the room. He kissed the back of your head before slipping out of the room. The last few hours seemed like a fever dream. Charles was alive. He and Magneto needed you and Logan to help with an end-of-the-world scenario. You were back at the mansion, standing in the room you once considered home. Weren’t you just going to Hawaii with Logan? Was this some nightmare that you’d wake up from? Did you really want to be here? Did you really want to help?

~~~

Logan was trying to be as quick as possible, knowing that you needed him close.

“Can we talk?” Marie stepped into Logan’s path as he was heading back to you with the bags.

“Not now,” he muttered.

“Then when? You and Y/N left and never reached out. None of us knew where you were or how to get a hold of you.”

“We needed the time to ourselves."

Marie scoffed. “Twelve years?”

“I ain’t going to apologize, kid, if that's what you're looking for. I—“

The familiar scent of your smoke hit Logan's nostrils. He was taking multiple stairs at a time before Marie could stop him. He burst through the bedroom door to see you curled up on the floor, panicking with smoke coming off your body.

“I got you, sweetheart,” he pulled you into his arms, not caring that you were burning through his clothes.

“Can’t—cool—down.” Every one of your words was a strangled breath.

“It’s okay, princess. We’ll cool you down.”

Logan lifted you up and carried you into the shower. He turned it on cold water, letting it run over the two of you.

“I’m sorry," you cried. “I’m sorry.”

Logan shushed you. “You’re okay. It’s okay.”

He held you until you returned to your normal body temperature. He quickly stripped you both of your wet clothes before drying you off, slipping one of his shirts over you, and tucking you into bed. He pulled some underwear on himself before crawling in bed behind you and tugging you to his chest.

“This is a lot,” you rasped.

“We can leave,” Logan mumbled. “We don't have to help.”

“Yes, we do… They are our family… and you heard Magneto. This could affect all mutants.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, burying his head into your neck. A few moments of silence fell between the two of you.

“I hope you know that this doesn't get you out of the Hawaii trip by any means. You’ll own me.”

He chuckled, pulling you impossibly closer. “Trust me, sweetheart, I’m already thinking of how to make it up to you.”

Chapter Text

You struggled to find sleep. It took you by surprise to find that Logan found rest and was staying asleep. It was after midnight when you decided to kiss Logan’s bare shoulder and slip out of bed. You found yourself wandering through the gardens until you reached a bench at the edge of the tree line and sat down. You placed your hands, palms up, on your legs and had small flames flicker in your palms.

“Please don't burn my home down,” Charles’ voice rang clear in the calm night.

You laughed, extinguishing the flames. “I won’t… this time,” you replied with a teasing smile as Charles wheeled over.

“You spent months out here, hiding from everyone, when you first arrived.”

“Yet, you always seemed to find me and never let me be alone for long… I need to thank you for helping Logan refurbish our home.”

“Of course. It’s clear that the two of you have truly grown into your relationship.”

“We have. The time alone has been everything we needed and more.”

“I’m glad.”

“There’s one thing that I don't understand, though… how are you here? You died, Charles. I watched Jean kill you.”

Charles sighed. “It’s a long story. One that I will share with you and Logan in the morning.”

You reached over and grabbed his hand. “I’m glad you’re back.”

“As am I.”

“There you are!” Logan exclaimed, rushing into the area. He had woken up to you no longer in bed, causing him to be alarmed. “You weren't in bed.”

“Sorry,” you apologized, as Logan came up and sat beside you. He pulled you into him, almost placing you in his lap. “I couldn't sleep and then Charles found me.”

“Next time leave a note.”

“Okay.” You kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

Charles watched you two with a sweet smile. “You two should head to bed,” he said. “We have a lot to go over in the morning.”

~~~

After breakfast, Charles gathered everyone in the briefing room. Logan was too anxious to sit, opting to stand behind your chair to still be near you. Everyone else was seated around the table.

Charles began by explaining how he survived his supposed death by Jean’s hands. His consciousness had jumped into another body that was in a pro-mutant doctor’s care. The doctor and Charles found several mutants that worked for years to piece Charles’ body back together, eventually successfully doing it. Charles came back to the mansion a few years ago, with Magneto showing up not long after, looking for help.

Magneto explained that his powers came back by sure will, and being an incredibly powerful mutant that the cure wasn’t able to fully take effect. It was after those explanations that Hank entered the room.

“Sorry I’m late,” he said. “It’s good to see you, Logan and Y/N.”

You sent him a soft smile. “It's good to see you, Hank,” you said.

“We need to stop wasting time,” Magneto murmured.

Charles pressed a button on the table, pulling up a hologram of the Trask Industries logo. “As many of you know, this is Trask Industries,” he explained. “Two years ago, they invaded the mansion and occupied it for a while.”

“What?” You questioned. “The mansion was occupied? Why did nobody call us?”

“The two of you were in Japan at the time, and I wouldn't allow you to be bothered.”

“You still should have—“

“We don't have the time!” Magneto slammed his fist against the table.

“Erik,” Charles scolded. “As it were, Trask Industries has risen in the technology industry, including technology for the government and military. They announced an updated Sentinel program after we reoccupied the mansion, wanting to use the Sentinels to monitor mutant activity.”

“Those Sentinels are about to be sold to multiple countries,” Hank stated. "I have tried to prevent the selling of these machines, but the pro-human movement is getting larger and more violent.”

“These Sentinels,” Logan began, “what exactly can they do?”

"They can fly,” Magneto responded, making a plan of a Sentinel appear. “They have guns, multiple types. But what makes them truly deadly is that they have the ability to target the mutant X-gene using a genetic guidance system that can lock onto a mark a mile away.”

“These Sentinels are not new,” Charles stated, “but are recently updated with advanced technology.”

“If these Sentinels are successfully sold and used, it could bring about the end of our kind.”

“I am doing my best as Mutant Ambassador to the United Nations,” Hank explained, “but there have been many threats, so they are considering pulling this job.”

“What exactly can we do about this right now?” Logan asked.

“We can prepare to fight,” Magneto replied.

“We must band together to stop the Sentinels from being used for evil,” Charles said. “If we must fight… then it will be our final option.”

“We need to begin training again,” Bobby said. He looked over at you and Logan. "You two can help with that.”

Logan’s hand went to your shoulder, gripping it. “I can help you, but Y/N is on the sidelines,” he said.

“Logan—“

“Does this have to do with the information the doctor in Japan found?” Hank questioned, cutting you off.

“It does,” Logan said. “Y/N cannot afford to be put in harm's way like that again."

“It is not your choice to make,” you retorted. You pulled away from his shoulder before standing up and turning around.

“Damn right, it is! As your husband—“

“Logan, this is about the fate of all mutants! I’m fighting whether you want me to or not.”

You and Logan glared each other down. You could see Logan’s jaw clench further before he turned around and stormed out of the room. Your heart ached. The two of you rarely fought anymore and of course within twenty-four hours of being here, you two were at each other’s throats.

“I think we are done for now,” Charles said. “Hank will keep us informed about the sale of the Sentinels. Bobby, create a training schedule and include Y/N and Logan in the rotation.”

“On it,” Bobby said.

“Y/N,” Hank called, coming up and placing a hand on your shoulder.

“No,” you whispered, pulling away and turning to face everyone. “I will help, but not at the cost of my marriage.”

“Your marriage means nothing if you’re killed by the Sentinels,” Magneto said. You hated how right he was.

“Go,” Charles urged, “talk to Logan. We will respect whatever you two decide.”

~~~

Despite the years away, the local bar was still the same. Logan scowled as he threw back another whiskey. He knew he shouldn’t have run after the meeting, but apparently, his old habit hadn’t died like he had originally thought. Logan didn’t like the thought of these Sentinels killing off the mutant population, but he especially didn’t like the idea of you being in harm’s way, whatever that looked like.

Logan lifted his finger as he set the glass down. “Another,” he rasped.

“Long day already?” The bartender questioned, pouring another drink.

“Long life. Thanks.”

Logan quickly threw back the new drink. He sighed as he set the glass down, finger running around the rim. Logan knew that you were strong enough to fight and that you were a good fighter. But Logan also knew that he wasn't strong enough to lose you again, especially if it was permanent. He didn’t know how he could continue on if you were gone for good. He also didn't like the idea of watching your powers begin to diminish as you continued to regenerate.

“You want another?” The bartender wondered.

Logan nodded, pushing his glass towards the bartender, before focusing back on his worry towards you.

~~~

Though, deep down, you knew that Logan had most likely run off to the bar, you couldn't help but look around the mansion. You had hope that he wouldn’t have gone bad to old habits, but there was something about the mansion that caused you both to revert back. You reached the garage, where Scott’s old motorcycle was missing.

“He’ll come back,” Marie said as she came up behind you. “He always does.”

“I know that," you responded. "He is my husband, after all.”

She sighed, walking to stand beside you. “I didn't mean—“

“I really don't have the mental capacity to deal with this right now, Marie. I know that we should have reached out. I know that we should have been here. But we needed to not be here. It was so good for us, and now we’ve been back for twenty-four hours, and we’re back into old habits. Fighting. Running away.”

“Then leave. Go back to your perfect life in the mountains.”

“Do you really think that I’d do that? That Logan would do that?”

“You’ve done it before."

“The whole of mutant kind wasn’t at stake before.” You shook your head. “Marie, I’m sorry that you feel that we abandoned you. I can't go back and change the past. All I can do is deal with the now, and right now, my husband ran off to a bar, and I need to drag him back here. So, are you going to give me a ride or not?”

~~~

You knew that Logan could sense you entering the bar. You couldn’t help but sigh as he didn’t make a move to even look at you. Heading over, you slipped into the seat beside Logan. Your eyes focused on your hands as you played with the ring on your finger.

“You left,” you whispered.

“Needed to clear my head,” Logan muttered. His eyes were mostly focused on the glass in his hand, but out of the corner of his eye, he could tell that you were nervously fiddling with your ring.

“Figured… We need to talk."

“Not now. Not here."

“Then let’s go back to the mansion.”

You rested a slightly shaky hand on his arm. Logan immediately noticed how you were shaking and his heart dropped. He turned to face you, eyes scanning to make sure you were physically okay, though your shakiness and your eyes were telling him you weren’t emotionally okay. Logan immediately regretted having left you.

“Okay,” he whispered.

Logan took your hand and pulled you to stand. He gently guided you out to the motorcycle and internally cursed himself for not bringing a helmet.

“You need to hold onto me tightly,” Logan softly told you. “I don't have a helmet for you.”

“That’s okay,” you told him. “I’m not fragile.”

“Sweetheart…” His hand came up to cup your cheek. “I know that. But I have to do what I can to protect you from anything and everything.”

Logan kissed your forehead before getting onto the motorcycle and reaching over to help you on. You held onto Logan tightly as he drove the two of you back to the mansion. The two of you quietly walked up to your room, holding hands until you reached your room. Logan shut the door as you began pacing the room.

“I shouldn't have left the meeting,” Logan said quietly.

“I don’t care about the meeting,” you said, shaking your head. “I care that you ran off to the bar. Why is it so easy to slip into old habits here?”

“I don’t know,” he sighed.

“Logan, we can’t let being here, dealing with all this, come between us.”

“I know, but… but, Y/N… princess… I can’t lose you. We both know how dangerous it is for you to be in the line of fire. If you die—“

“I’ve been in fights before, for years. It’s part of our life. I can fight, even if I die. We don't know how many more times I can come back; it could be a lot.”

“It also could be none! I will not watch you die again! It will… It will destroy me…” Logan’s shoulders slumped, and his eyes shone with so much care and concern.

“Logan…” You walked up to Logan and gently took his face in your hands. “I know that you are terrified of losing me. I am terrified of losing you. I didn’t allow myself to live after losing you. I was barely surviving. Just going through the motions until you came back into my life. I know how it feels.”

“But I can handle more, you—“

“I'm not weak, Logan, and you aren't invincible. Someday, life will catch up to both of us. We both have to be careful.”

His hands came up and laced his fingers through yours. “I can’t lose you.”

“I can’t lose you either.”

“If we fight, we fight together.”

“Of course.”

“And we train together.”

“Wouldn't have it any other way.”

He moved your hands, kissing the palms of each of them. “You sure I can't convince you to run and hide?”

“Not a chance.”

Guiding your hands down, Logan let go of them and wrapped his arms around you. He pulled you close, resting his forehead against yours.

“I need you close," he whispered.

“Okay,” you breathed out. “We're going to get through this.”

~~~

You and Logan stayed glued to each other’s hips as plans began to form and training continually happened. The mansion still ran as a school, with you both stepping in to help. It was weeks after your arrival when a mental scream woke everyone up. Before you could question it, you and Logan were running down to the Professor's bedroom. Ororo, Bobby, and Marie not far behind.

“Charles!” You exclaimed, rushing to his side.

“Hank,” he rasped like he was in pain. “Hank!”

“What's wrong?” Ororo asked.

“Hank… He’s dead.”

Chapter Text

It was all over the news.

DR. HANK MCCOY MURDERED BY PROTESTORS

The anti-mutant protestors invaded his home. Hank didn’t stand a chance, having been asleep when the attack happened. Mutants were using his death as a reason to fight back, with anti-mutant believers using his death as proof that even strong mutants could fall.

You felt like you were living in a nightmare. Before morning, pro-mutant and anti-mutant attacks had run rampant, and the Sentinels had been sold to fifteen nations and counting. Everyone in the mansion was on edge.

Colossus, Bobby, and Charles were going to retrieve Hank's body. You were trying to convince Logan to join them despite his insistence on staying with you.

“No, sweetheart,” he shook his head, arms crossed over his chest. “I’m staying here. It’s gettin’ dangerous, and I won’t leave your side.”

“Please, Logan,” you were begging now. “He’s— Hank—“ You were getting choked up, causing you to look up at the ceiling as you tried to reign it in. “He was my friend… My close friend and he’s— Logan, our friend is dead, and they’re probably going to drag his body around at protests as a symbol that mutants can fall. We can’t let that happen. You have to go with them… please… If not for Hank, for me… Bring Hank back safely… for me.”

The look you were giving Logan was heartbreaking. You were clearly devastated over Hank’s loss and terrified of what the repercussions of his death would be. Tears were threatening to spill over your eyes, and so far, you had been successful at keeping them at bay. Logan wasn’t good at saying no to you, especially when you were begging. He was torn between honoring his friend and protecting you. But he knew that you would never forgive him if the protestors used Hank’s body for their own gain.

“Fine,” Logan murmured. “I’ll go.” You launched yourself at him, wrapping your arms tightly around him. He quickly hugged you back. “But you have to promise me to stay at the mansion. You cannot leave. It’s too dangerous out there right now, and this is the safest place to be."

“Okay,” you rasped. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me, princess,” he pressed a kiss to your head. “Hank was my friend too, and he deserves to be buried here and buried properly.”

“You need to stay safe out there. Protect the others... we can't lose anymore.”

“I'll make sure they come back.”

“And you... you need to come back, too. Okay? I can’t— I can’t lose you…”

Logan held you tighter. “You won’t.”

~~~

Magneto did not go with the other men, and found no need to help the rest of you. He hid himself away, most likely reaching out to his own contacts and devising a plan.

You, Ororo, Kitty, and Marie worked together to get many of the students home to their parents, who were nervous and requested them home. The students without a safe place would stay at the mansion, in the best protection you could provide. You were going through the motions, trying to ignore the panic and grief that threatened to overtake you.

“You should rest,” Ororo said, having to stand directly in front of you in order to get your attention.

“I’m fine,” you brushed her off.

“No, you're not. You’re the only one of us still here that’s yet to have a good cry. I can see how much this is all weighing on you, and you haven’t noticed, but I’ve been putting out small fires all day. You need to take a break.”

“I will when Logan gets back.”

Ororo sighed. “Y/N—“

“Just leave me alone!”

Your hands burst into flames at your outburst, causing Ororo to step back. Kitty and Marie were standing nearby, watching the scene unfold. You were trembling as you calmed your flames down.

“The rest of you are mourning, too,” you muttered. “Not just me.”

“We’ve been mourning,” Marie said. “You've been pushing it down.”

“Maybe my mourning just looks different than what you think it should?”

Ororo sighed. “Arguing isn't going to get any of us anywhere,” she said. “I believe we all need a break.”

You turned and marched off, leaving everyone watching you with concerned eyes. You headed down to the lower level and into the Danger Room. You needed a moment of peace in a space that would be okay for you to lose your cool in. Once you reached the middle of the room, you collapsed onto your knees. Your body went up in flames without you even thinking, quickly burning your clothes off. You lurched forward as a sob tore through you. The sound of sizzling filled the room as your tears tried to trickle their way from your eyes and down your cheeks. Slowly, smoke filled the room, but you didn't pay it any mind.

~~~

Logan was anxious, this being the first time in a long time that it had been this far away from you. He had been needed in retrieving Hank’s body, so he didn't regret going, but he wished that Bobby would fly the jet back to the mansion a bit faster. Currently, he was sitting in the back of the jet, cigar in his mouth. He hadn’t bothered lighting it, knowing it would agitate Charles.

Logan’s eyes bore into the black body bag that contained Hank. Hank’s body wasn't a pretty sight, and he needed to prepare himself to keep you from seeing it at all costs. The sight would break you; Logan knew it.

The jet ride was full of silent tension, made up of a mixture of grief and anger. When the jet landed and the ramp lowered, Logan picked up Hank’s body bag and carried it down. The others followed as Logan headed for the lab. He placed the body bag on the lab table.

“I can't believe this is real,” Bobby murmured.

“We must do what we can to stay strong,” Charles said. “We should all get some rest. It’s been a long day.”

The group entered the hall, where a light dusting of smoke filled the air. Logan's senses were on high alert as the familiar scent hit his nostrils.

“Where is that smoke coming from?” Colossus wondered.

“Y/N,” Charles breathed out as Logan followed his senses and ran towards the Danger Room, where smoke was seeping out from where the two doors met.

Logan slammed his fist against the button, and the doors slid open. Large billows of dark smoke floated into the hallway. Charles, Bobby, and Colossus moved back, covering their mouths as they coughed. Before anyone could stop him, Logan was rushing into the smoke.

“Y/N!" Logan coughed. He pulled his flannel up over his mouth, and he tried to find you amidst the thick, black smoke. “Y-Y/N!”

Suddenly, a large whoosh of wind looped around the room, pushing the smoke out through the vents. Logan glanced back to see that Ororo, Marie, and Kitty had joined the others, with Ororo handling the smoke. His eyes scanned the room, only to find you lying in the middle of it, naked. Running over, Logan realized that you were no longer on fire, but you were unconscious. He threw off his leather jacket and flannel before kneeling down and slipping them over you to give you some coverage.

“Is Y/N alright?” Marie asked, the group having moved into the room.

“What do you think?” Logan snapped.

His eyes were scanning the skin he hadn’t covered for scars. He hated that he was praying to see at least one, meaning you hadn’t died and come back. If Logan couldn’t find one and you truly had been reborn, he was grabbing you and running the hell away.

“Y/N was on edge all day,” Ororo explained calmly. “I was putting out fires left and right without her even noticing.”

Charles wheeled himself closer and closed his eyes. “Y/N will be fine,” he said, searching your mind. “She didn’t die.” That gave Logan very little relief. “Her emotions overwhelmed her mutation, and she needed to let it out.” Charles opened his eyes and looked at Logan. "She came down here knowing that it was a safe space to let her mutation run rampant. It has been another long day. We will have a memorial service and begin forming a plan forward tomorrow.”

Without another word, Logan lifted you up and carried you up to the bedroom. Once he had you up there, he set you on to the bed before he slipped underwear onto you and kept a flannel on you. With a sigh, Logan sat on the edge of the bed and stared at you.

“What were you thinking, sweetheart?” Logan murmured, taking one of your hands in his.

Logan's thumb rubbed against the back of your hand as his ears tuned in to your steady heartbeat. It took too long for Logan’s liking for you to wake and when you did, he could see how confused you were to be in the bedroom. Eventually, your eyes fell on him.

“When did you get back?” You asked, voice horse.

“Hour or two ago,” he replied, clearly unhappy. “Found you in the Danger Room. Smoke everywhere. You… you were lying naked in the center of the room.”

Your heart dropped as you realized what he must have thought happened. “I—I didn’t die.” You sat up, gripping his hand as you met his eyes dead on. The words fell out of your mouth at a frantic pace, wanting Logan to know the truth. “I promise I didn't die. I got overwhelmed. The flames overtook me. I got worn out, and then I passed out. I promise I didn’t die.” You moved over, getting into his lap. “I didn't die."

“I know, sweetheart. Breathe.” His hands moved to secure you in place. “Charles told me… Still concerned me.”

“I'm sorry.” Your hands slid over his shoulders and found a home at the back of his neck, finger combing through his hair. “I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

“Did you… Did you bring Hank home?”

“Had to throw a few punches, but yes. The funeral’s in the morning."

“I need to see him.”

Logan’s arms tightened around you. “Can't allow that, honey. He’s in bad shape.”

“I can’t believe this is happening,” you whispered. “I bet most of the countries in the United Nations have Sentinels ordered by now… Logan, how much longer are we truly safe here?”

Logan hated that you were questioning your safety, but you had a point. How long would it be until they stormed the mansion?

“You’re safe with me, honey,” he promised. “Always.”

“You can't always protect me, Logan.”

“I will always protect you… until my dying breath.”

~~~

The service for Hank was short and small. Almost as soon as it was over, the group began running rescue missions to save mutants who were being forced to leave their homes. Regular trainings were scheduled, with many of the newly rescued mutants joining in.

Logan and you were never far from each other. The two of you were beginning to feel more like soldiers than people. During the day the two of you were the Wolverine and Ember, heroes who seemed to never stop. When night fell and the two of you found the solace of your bedroom, you were Logan and Y/N, husband and wife. Most nights were spent holding each other close, whether it was sexual or not. Tonight was no different.

It had now been months since Hank’s death. More Sentinels had been sold to governments worldwide, with a few governments already using them. It had been a long day, having saved another group of mutants and taken them to a safe place that Magneto had pulled together. The two of you were cuddled together on the bed, close to sleep, when the alarms went off. Logan jumped out of bed and was quickly at the door.

“Stay here,” Logan ordered.

“Not a chance,” you retorted, meeting him at the door.

As soon as the door opened, you could hear the gunfire coming from outside. Charles had formed a plan in case this happened.

Logan released his claws. “Get yourself and everyone you can down to the jet,” he said. “I'll meet you there.”

“Logan—“ You were cut off by his lips attacking yours.

“I love you."

You pulled him back to you, kissing him again. “I love you more.”

Logan gave you one last look before he ran off to join the fight. You ran off in the opposite direction, heading to Marie and Bobby's room. They were running out as you reached the door.

“I’ll get her down to the jet!” You immediately offered.

“Okay,” Bobby said. He and Marie kissed before Bobby ran off.

“We need to grab the kids.”

Marie and you rushed from room to room, gathering the kids and other mutants. You ushered them into the secret passageways, telling them how to get to the jet or the outer areas to run. Once the rooms were cleared, you and Marie headed for the jet yourselves. As you were headed there, you paused, hearing screams. You turned toward the sounds that were coming from down the tunnel.

“Those are... screams,” Marie said nervously.

“Get to the jet, Marie,” you ordered.

“But—“

“Get to the jet, now!”

Without another word, Marie scurried down the tunnel. You slowly headed in the opposite direction, wanting to know why there were screams of pain. You gasped as you came closer. Two Sentinels were in the tunnel, dead mutants surrounding them. It had been a trap. A full front attack, allowing for the Sentinels to breach the mansion. You couldn't let them get to the others. No matter the cost.

~~~

The fight out front dealt with humans, meaning that Logan, Magneto, Bobby, Kitty, Ororo, Colossus, and other mutants could handle them. It wasn’t easy, everyone was tired and there was a variety of injuries throughout, but they defeated them. The group headed for the jet, where many other mutants were waiting with Charles and Marie. Logan’s eyes scanned the jet, heart clenching with each face that wasn't yours.

“Where’s Y/N?” He asked, looking to Charles and Marie for an explanation.

“Logan, there were screams—“

“I don't need excuses, Marie. I need to know where my wife is!”

“She’s still in the tunnels.”

Logan was gone before anyone could stop him, with Ororo and Bobby behind him. He entered the tunnels and followed the scent of your smoke. As he got closer, he could hear your grunting and the sound of metal movements. Logan’s face contorted to one of pure anger as he saw a Sentinel had you by the neck, holding you up in the air. There was a destroyed Sentinel on the ground, surrounded by burnt bodies. Any other time, Logan would be turned on that you took down a Sentinel, especially when there was two attacking you, but your life was in danger.

Logan roared as he released his claws and charged at the Sentinel. Ororo formed a storm cloud and lightning while Bobby turned to ice. Logan’s claws cut through some of the metal, but not enough to stop the Sentinel. You were gasping for air as the Sentinel squeezed your throat tighter. Bobby used his ice to freeze the Sentinel’s feet while Ororo strategically struck it with lightning. The Sentinel’s grip faltered, and Logan rushed over, catching you before you could hit the ground. You were coughing, trying to get more air into your lugs.

“I’ve got you, I've got you,” Logan whispered as Bobby set a large ice spear through the Sentinel, destroying it.

Logan kept you in his arms as he, Bobby, and Ororo rushed back to the jet. Colossus got the jet off the ground as soon as he was told. Logan found a small corner of privacy and sunk down to the ground, holding you close.

“Thank you,” you rasped.

“No need to thank me for saving my wife,” he whispered, emotion weighing heavy in his words. “It’s my duty.”

You leaned into him and closed your arms. “I don't think this is anywhere near over… we aren't safe anywhere.”

He kissed your head, holding you tighter. Silence feel over the two of you as the fear of the unknown washed over the jet.

Chapter Text

Sleep was a luxury now. Being on the run meant that you had no bed. No home. No safety. The jet was the closest thing to a home or safety, but it was more like a command center. It was where plans were made, people were contacted, and fights were had. If any sleep was to be found, it was from the floor or the chairs.

More and more Sentinels were released every day. Their goal was to eliminate all the mutants. Your group had taken it upon themselves to protect as many mutants as possible and the humans that tried to protect them.

Logan and you were currently getting a group of rescued mutants settled in at one of the old warehouses Charles had found for a safe haven. It had been a few years since the raid on the mansion, with each year wearing everyone down more than the last. Logan was leaning against the wall, watching you help a parentless child get tucked into a sleeping bag for the night. Despite the hell of the last years, you were still amazing in his eyes. You were fierce in battle and kind to those who needed your help. You were also still as beautiful as the day he met you.

After making sure the child was settled in, you came back over to Logan. You wrapped your arms around him and set your head on his chest with a sigh. Closing your eyes, you allowed yourself to focus on the beating of Logan’s heart. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you against him. As the minutes passed, Logan could feel the tension slowly melt from your body, causing you to rely on him more for support.

“Come on, sweetheart,” he mumbled, picking you up. “We need to try and get some rest.”

You nodded against him, fighting to keep your eyes open. Logan carried you over to a corner, where he had already set up a few blankets for you to share. He helped you out of your worn battle gear and tucked you in before taking off his own and slipping in next to you. You moved so that you were laying on his chest. You looked up at him, furrowing your brows when you noticed something in the hair above his ear. You lifted your hand and gently touched the hair above his ear.

“What is it?” Logan asked quietly.

“Your hair,” you whispered. “There’s some grey in it.”

“Impossible,” he scoffed.

“I’m serious, Logan. There’s some grey hairs there.”

“Guess it's all the stress.”

“Or you're finally aging a little.”

“Whatever.”

“Would it be so bad?”

Logan thought about it. You had aged over time, though still much younger than your actual age. Sometimes, he would catch himself noticing the little changes on you. But that often led him to a downward spiral of thinking that he would last much longer than you. Forced to a life without you; something Logan would never be able to handle.

“No,” he responded gruffly, “guess not.”

You leaned up and kissed under his chin. “If it helps, I think it’s hot.”

Logan huffed a brief chuckle as he held you tighter. “A little.”

~~~

The explosion of a bomb had you and Logan scrambling awake. Screams of those you'd rescued the previous day echoed through the warehouse, the furthest end now in ruins and on fire.

“Everyone!” Logan shouted. “This way!” He waved everyone over and ushered them towards the large doors that led into the woods.

“Logan!” You yelled. “There’s nowhere to go!”

“The woods are our only choice! Come on, everyone!"

Another bomb dropped, causing more screams and Logan to jump over you to protect you. Debris flew around, scraping you, Logan, and the others.

“Are you alright?" Logan fretted as he searched your body for major injuries. You were scraped up, but nothing that wouldn’t heal and scar over.

“I’m fine,” you responded, breathing heavily. "We need to get help.”

He nodded. “I’ll call it in.”

As he turned to get the comms device, another bomb fell. This time, just a few feet away from the two of you. Quickly as you could, you used your ability to try and control the fire within the explosion. You groaned at the amount of energy it was taking you to barely keep this explosion at bay.

“Logan!” You screamed. "You need to get out of here!"

“Not without you!” Logan shouted. He had the comms device to his ear and pressed it. “Professor.” No answer, so he left a message. "The warehouse has been bombed. The people are fleeing to the woods. Y/N is trying to hold back another bomb. I’m not leaving her side. Hurry.” He tossed the comms device away before hurrying to your side.

“I… I can’t hold it… much... longer… Run.”

“Not a chance, sweetheart.” His hands came up to your waist, holding tightly. “I’m taking you and we're running as soon as you let go.”

“We won’t… make it... far…”

“Don't care. I'm not leaving you."

“Idiot.”

“You married me.”

“A real wedding… if we survive... we need it... our friends need it…"

“Okay. Whatever you want.” He noticed that you were trembling more, sweat running down your face. “Sweetheart, I—“

“Just kiss me, James.”

Logan did as you asked, craning his neck around to kiss you properly. Your tears mixed with the sweat on your face. When Logan pulled away, he could tell how little energy you had left.

“You have to let go, sweetheart,” he pled. “I have you. I’m here. The Team is on their way, and those we rescued are running… it’s okay to let go now.”

You took a shaky breath, nodding. “Okay… 3… 2… 1.”

As quick as Logan could, he pulled you away from the explosion and began running with you. The bomb exploded, and Logan launched the two of you away. The two of you fell to the ground, with Logan landing harshly on top of you. You gasped as you felt pain in your abdomen like something had punctured you from behind. Pain radiated throughout your body as Logan tried to protect you like a shield. Another explosion went off, debris flying everywhere, including on top of the two of you, knocking you two out.

~~~

Logan could hear the sounds of medical equipment before he was fully awake. Slowly, his eyes opened, and he looked around. He seemed to be in a makeshift hospital room of some shorts. He was lying down on a metal table and completely alone. Logan sat up with a grow, ripping off the wires and tubes connected to him.

“Y/N,” he mumbled. “Y/N…”

Logan got to his feet and stumbled out of the room.

“Logan!” Ororo exclaimed, launching herself into him for a hug. “I’m so glad you’re alright.”

Logan could barely hug back, only having one thing in mind. “Where's Y/N?” He felt Ororo tense as she stepped back.

“Logan—“

“Where’s my wife?”

Ororo sighed and motioned to the door nearby. Logan quickly entered the room to see the Professor sitting beside a metal table with black ashes over it.

“No,” Logan gasped, coming forward. “No, no, no, no, no.”

“Her injuries were too severe,” Charles explained. There was more to the story, but Charles knew that Logan wouldn't be able to handle the fact that Logan landing on you did most of the damage. “We tried to help her, but her body had other plans.”

“When did it happen?”

“Almost twenty-four hours ago. There's been no sign of her since.”

“It took a week for her to return the first time. She’ll come back."

“We don’t have the time,” Magneto stated, entering. “The Sentinels have received an upgrade, and the new batch is already being delivered worldwide. We need to keep moving.”

“Not until she's back!”

“You’re wife did what she could for the cause. It’s time to continue the fight. Without her.” Logan took a step forward, moving to pull out his claws, but Magneto stopped him. “You never learn.”

“I’m not leaving here without her."

“Erik,” Charles called calmly. “We can’t jump into fighting these new Sentinels without more information. We can wait a few more days."

Magneto huffed, letting Logan go. “Fine.” Then he stormed out.

“I will let you have some time alone.” Charles began wheeling out of the room.

“Charles,” Logan called, looking at your pile of ash. “What... what were her injuries?”

Charles stopped and turned his wheelchair around. “Logan—"

“I need to know.”

“Sometimes it is better if we don’t know everything.”

“I was trying to save her… did I… did I do something to make it worse?”

Charles sighed, wheeling over to Logan’s side. “Your skeleton makes your body weigh at least 300 pounds. Combined with the explosion, the force of your body landing on top of her caused internal damage. She also landed on top of some debris, causing it to pierce her from behind.”

Logan’s fists clenched as his claws threatened to appear. He had always promised to be the one to protect you, but he was again the cause of your pain… of your death.

“It is not your fault, Logan," Charles continued. “Honesty, if you hadn't landed on her, she could have been lost to the explosion. You are the only reason we were able to get her back here before her body burned… If you hadn't, we would have lost her.”

“What do you mean?"

“Her body is only able to come back because her ashes are all together. Wind, explosions, any act of splitting her ashes up would prevent her from coming back… you saved her, Logan.”

Charles’ explanation didn’t help Logan feel any comfort. It only made his anxieties about you dying worse. He had been lucky with where your body had burned itself so far, but what happens if you’re in battle? If the right wind or explosion whisks your ashes away? You’d be gone for good, and Logan would be utterly destroyed.

No one could say anything else before you were suddenly sitting up, gasping for air as the ashes fell around you. Logan rushed forward and held you.

“I got you... I got you,” he whispered.

“Logan,” you gasped, holding onto him tightly.

“I’m here… you’re here… you’re here.”

~~~

Logan knew that there was no protecting you from battles in this new life the two of you were forced into, but that didn’t stop him from trying. He constantly tried to get you to stay in the jet or back at wherever the current base was. You never took the bait, always there beside him in the fight.

As the years passed and technology advanced, so did the Sentinels and their A.I. capabilities. The Sentinels began to control themselves and upgrade themselves. They kept on killing mutants but had now added humans with the possibility of passing down the x-gene. It became a mass worldwide war. Whole cities were destroyed, with piles of bodies everywhere: human and mutant. There were still humans out to kill the mutants, and they did whatever it took to help the Sentinels.

It was now 2023, eight years since the raid on the mansion. You, Logan, Ororo, Magneto, and Charles were in the current jet. Charles was using the advanced Cerebro that he and Magneto had put together in the jet. Logan and Ororo were piloting while you were sitting by Charles and Magneto was in the back.

“So few of us left,” Charles muttered. “I’ve found them."

Charles told Logan and Ororo where to pilot, flying the group off to a mountain range in China where you were to regroup with some old students in an abandoned monastery. Ororo exited first, forcing the fog away from the monastery and the jet. Logan took your hand and led you down the steps. He pulled a cigar from his pocket and placed it between his, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Really?” You teased. “Now?”

“What?” He said, still with the cigar between his lips. “Little help?”

You rolled your eyes again before lighting the cigar and heading into the monastery. Charles and Magneto followed behind. The four of you were eventually surrounded by surviving mutants.

“Professor!” Bobby greeted, showing the other mutants that the five of you were safe.

“Bobby,” Ororo smiled, pulling him in for a hug.

“Hey, Storm.”

“Hey, kid," Logan greeted as Bobby faced the two of you. Bobby nodded.

“Professor!” Kitty called, coming out with Colossus. “You made it.”

Bobby went over and held Kitty's hand, reminding you that Marie had been lost years ago. Logan held your hand tighter as he put out the cigar. Kitty led you all inside so that she could explain the situation.

“Whenever the Sentinels attack, Warpath spots them," Kitty explained. “Then I send Bishop back to warn us of the attack before it happens. Blink scouts the next site, and then we leave before they ever know we were there.”

“Because we never were,” Warpath said.

“What do you mean you were never there?” Logan asked.

"She projects Bishop back in time a few days to warn the others of the coming attack,” Charles explained.

“So she sends Bishop back in time?”

"No, just his consciousness, into his younger self. His younger body.”

“Wow.”

“This might just work, Charles,” Magneto said.

“What might work?” Kitty wondered.

“The Sentinel program was originally conceived by Doctor Bolivar Trask. In the early ‘70s, he was one of the world's leading weapons designers. But, covertly, he had begun experimenting on mutants… using their gifts to fuel his own research. There was one mutant who had discovered what he was doing.”

“A mutant with the ability to transform herself into anyone,” Magneto added.

“Mystique,” you whispered.

“I knew her as Raven,” said Charles. “We met when we were children, grew up together. She was like a sister to me. I tried to help her... but only succeeded in driving her away. She hunted Trask across the world. And at the Paris Peace Accords in 1973, after the Vietnam War, she found Trask, and killed him. It was the first time she killed.”

“It wasn't her last," Logan muttered.

“But killing Trask did not have the outcome she expected. It only persuaded the government of the need for his program. They captured her that day, tortured her, experimented on her. In her DNA, they discovered the secrets to her powers of transformation. It gave them the key they needed to create weapons that could adapt to any mutant power. And in less than 50 years, the machines that have destroyed, so many of our kind were created. But it all started that day in 1973, the day she first killed. The day she truly became Mystique.”

“You want to go back there," Kitty stated.

“If I can get to her, stop the assassination, keep her out of their hands, then we can stop the Sentinels from ever being born.”

“And end this war before it ever begins,” Magneto added.

“Uh, I can send someone back a couple weeks. Maybe a month," Kitty said. “But you're talking about going back decades. You have the most powerful brain in the world, Professor, but the mind can only stretch so far before it snaps. It would rip you apart. I'm sorry. No one could survive that trip."

“What if someone's mind has a way of snapping back?” Logan wondered. "What if someone can heal as fast as they're ripped apart?”

“Logan, no," you said, shaking your head. “It's too much of a risk.”

“Yeah, I’m getting that.”

“No, you don’t.” You turned to Kitty. "What are the risks?”

“The past and present will continue to coexist,” Kitty began explaining. “Once you wake up, whatever you do will take hold and become history. The last fifty years will change and you will be the only person who remembers what it was like before you changed it.”

“See?” Your head snapped to Logan. “Everything in the last fifty years. That’s us, Logan! Our relationship. There has to be another way.”

“Sweetheart,” he gently cupped your face. “I’m the only one who could survive.”

“But us… Logan... what about us?”

"I'm doing this for us. So we can go back to our cabin in the mountains and live out the remainder of our long lives there… in 1973, were we together?"

“What?”

“You need to help jog my memory, sweetheart. In 1973, where were we?”

“Uh... we left Team X in 1972. We were on the run… various places.”

“Then I’ll make sure that we stick together."

“But we weren't in a relationship then.”

“Doesn't matter,” he shook his head. “Had I promised to protect you?”

“Yes.”

“Then I will still do it… you have to trust me, sweetheart."

“It's not you I don't trust.” You pulled away and looked back at Kitty. “And what happens if he dies?”

“Then we’ve lost,” she responded.

“Sweetheart…” Logan whispered.

“Fine,” you replied. “Do what you need to."

You walked away, heading outside. Logan followed. He grabbed your wrist and pulled you back into him. You fought against his hold but he only held tighter.

“I don’t want to lose my memories… I don't want to lose you…” you cried.

“You won’t lose me,” Logan promised. “And if you lose the memories, I’ll remember them for you… just like you've done for me. We’ll make new memories.”

“What if… what if you wake up and we aren’t together?”

“I'll fight for you… fight for you to be mine.” Logan slowly turned you around to face him. “I have to do this... for us… so that we have a future.”

“I know… doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

Logan cupped your face and kissed you with a fervent passion you hadn’t seen from him in years. You pulled him in closer, fighting for dominance as the two of you kissed that it was the last time you ever would. The two of you were too caught up in the kiss that neither of you heard the Sentinel land behind you. You gasped into Logan's mouth as the Sentinel formed its arm into a spear and rammed it through you. You shoved Logan away, causing him to stumble back in surprise. His eyes widened as he noticed the Sentinel and how you were impaled.

“Y/N!” He roared.

Magneto appeared on the steps and used his powers to push the Sentinel back. The Sentinel’s spear went back with it, causing you to fall forward. Logan quickly caught you, lowering you to the ground in his arms. Magneto took care of the Sentinel as everyone else rushed out to see the scene. You were bleeding heavily, gasping for air.

"You'll heal,” Logan whispered. “I'm here… you’ll heal."

“Lo—Logan…” you rasped.

He shushed you as tears pooled in his eyes. “Don’t. Don't waste your energy.”

“There was poison on the spear," Charles stated, he and the others staying back. Logan could barely register the words. “She won't make it."

“I-I-I love you…” you gasped, blood now appearing from the corner of your mouth.

“Sweetheart, no,” Logan was actively crying now. "You'll be okay. If you die, you'll heal.”

You gave him the best smile you could muster. “N—No… I… won’t… Go… save… the world… James… my Wolverine.” You were still bleeding as your heart stopped, and you went limp in Logan's arms.

“No… NO!” He held you closer as he rocked back and forth. “Come back,” he begged. “Come back.” His head snapped up to look at the others. "One of you do something! Anything!”

“Logan,” Charles’ calm voice echoed through the area. "The only thing we can do now is send you back. And we are running out of time."

Logan focused back on you. He held a kiss to your head, letting his tears slip down his face and onto yours. “I will fix this, sweetheart. I will get you back… whatever it takes.”

Chapter Text

Logan clenched and unclenched his fits repeated. One of them had his dog takes, taken from around your neck, and the other had your ring, taken from your finger. He stood in front of the alter in which he would lay on, and Kitty would send his conscience back in time. The monastery was barred off with Kitty, Bobby, Magneto, Charles, and Logan inside, with all the others outside.

“So I wake up in my younger body, God knows where, then what?” Logan’s voice was emotionless as he kept his eyes on the alter.

“You’ll need to go to my house and find me,” Charles told him. “Convince me of all of this.”

“Won't you be able to just read my mind?"

"I didn't have my powers in 1973. Logan, you're going to have to do for me what I once did for you. Lead me, guide me. I was a very different man then. You'll have to be patient with me.”

“Patience is my strongest suit.” His grip on the belongings tightened.

“You'll need me as well," Magneto added.

“What?"

“After Mystique left Charles, she came with me, and I set her on a dangerous path. A darker path. It's going to take the two of us, side by side, at a time when we couldn't be further apart."

Logan glanced at Charles for confirmation, who nodded. “Great. So where do I find you?”

“Well, it's complicated. You’ll find me below the Pentagon.”

“Fine.” Logan laid down on the alter, keeping your items in his grip.

“Basically, your body will go to sleep while your mind travels back in time,” Kitty explained. “As I said before, the past and present will continue to coexist as long as you're back there. But once you wake up, whatever you've done will take hold and become history. For the rest of us, it’ll be the only history that we know. It’ll be like the last fifty years never happened, in this world, in this war. The only person who will remember it is you.”

Logan turned his head to look at Charles. "I'll wake up, and she'll be there… I’ll be with her.”

“If what Y/N said is true, then that is correct,” Charles said. "You cannot get distracted by her, Logan. She is your Y/N, but a much younger version of whom you don't have the same history with. You must be careful, whatever you choose to do with her.”

Logan gave a nod before looking back up at the ceiling. Kitty placed her hands on either side of his head and got into his field of vision.

“Alright, Logan, I need you to clear your head and to stay as calm as possible,” Kitty urged.

“What?" he questioned. “My wife just died. Calm is impossible."

“I’m serious, Logan.”

“What do you mean?”

“If your mind gets rocky, it'll be harder for me to hold you. You could start to slip between past and future."

“What if I need to get a little rocky?"

“Think peaceful thoughts."

"Peaceful thoughts… You have any good news?”

“Well, you don't really age so you'll pretty much look the same… so will Y/N.”

“You won’t have much time in the past," Bobby cut in. “The Sentinels will find us. They always do.”

“And this time, we won't be able to run. We’ll have no escape. This is our last chance.”

“Okay,” Logan breathed out, trying to calm his mind, which was almost impossible since you just died in his arms. "See you all soon."

“This might sting a little,” Kitty warned before getting started. Logan screamed as Kitty entered his mind.

~~~

Footsteps woke Logan up. His mind was fuzzy as he opened his eyes and looked around. He was lying on the floor with a simple blanket a pillow. The room was small and dingy, clearly a motel room. There was a simple twin bed in it. With a groan, Logan got up and walked over to the mirror. He had jeans on, but was shirtless. Kitty had been right about the aging thing. He practically looked the same. Lifting his fists up, Logan released his claws, revealing his original bone claws instead of the adamantium ones he had grown accustomed to.

“Holy shit,” he murmured. “It worked.”

After putting his claws away, Logan tuned into the noise coming from the connected bathroom. Slowly, he walked over to the bathroom, where the door was slightly ajar. Logan didn’t allow himself to look in just yet. Instead, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose. His version of you that was his wife hadn’t been dead for very long, but as your scent hit his nose, it had felt like an eternity since he had smelt you.

“James?” Your voice broke him from his trance. You were looking at him utterly confused, the bathroom door now wide open. “What are you doing?”

“Uh, bathroom,” he muttered, eyes wide as he took you in. You were younger, making him realize how much you had actually aged in that fifty years, though it still wasn't much. And still as beautiful as ever.

“Right.”

You stepped out, your arm brushing his as you passed. His heart stopped at your touch, your warmth, even if it was just for a passing moment. Logan stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. It was going to take a lot from him in order to keep himself together. You couldn't know the truth. Not yet, anyway. He couldn't risk losing you again.

“James?” You called through the bathroom door. He had forgotten that during this time, he was your James not Logan. He could hear you moving around on the other side, like you were packing up. “What are the plans today? Where are we headed?”

“Uh… I was thinking New York.” He cringed as he waited for your answer. He didn't even know where the two of you were currently.

“We’re in New York.”

“Yeah, right, uh, Westchester.”

“That's in the opposite direction.”

“Well, I got some intel."

“Intel?” Logan opened the door to look at you. “What intel?”

Logan sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought. “There's something we need to do there.”

“What is it?”

“Can’t tell you yet.”

“You can’t tell me?” Logan watched as you took a slight step back, almost like you were protecting yourself from the secrets. “James? What is going on?”

Logan sighed, running his hand through his hair. “Just... trust me.”

“I've been trusting you. I just thought… well, I thought we were searching for a safe place to settle down."

“We still are.” He walked over to you. His hands reached out out of reflex. Stopping himself before he touched you, his hands clenched together. “I promised you and I intend on keeping that promise. I just need you to keep trusting me.”

You looked at him like you were studying his mind. Logan knew that you could tell something was off, but you had yet to question him.

“Alright," you finally said. “Hurry up then. I'll meet you in the car.”

You slung your bag over your shoulder and slipped out of the door. Logan's head fell back with a sigh. Once he was fully dressed and his bag was packed, Logan met you at the car. You were waiting in the passenger seat, nervously looking around. Logan’s heart clenched as he remembered how nervous you were about getting caught by Stryker. It was another thing he needed to worry about, making sure that didn't happen as he continued his mission. Logan got in the driver's seat and threw his back in the back.

You kept your gaze out the window as Logan drove the two of you. Instinctively, Logan's hand reached out and rested on your thigh. Your head snapped to look at it as you tensed. Before you could fully think, Logan pulled away.

“Sorry, I, uh,” he cleared his throat as both hands gripped the steering wheel. “I could tell you're nervous.”

“Well, I just don’t understand why we’re backtracking,” you admitted. “It’s too dangerous.”

“Trust me—“

“I am trusting you. Doesn’t mean I have to agree with your decisions.”

Logan nodded. You went back to staring out the window, with Logan glancing at you often.

~~~

Logan drove to the mansion on memory alone. When the two of you pulled up to the run-down mansion, you couldn’t help but question what exactly the two of you were doing here. Logan took in the sight before him as he drove to the actual mansion through the grounds. The plants were over-grown and there wasn’t a light and life in the place that there was once long ago in Logan's memory.

“James, what is this place?” You asked.

“A school,” he responded. “Or it will be— was. It was."

You gave him a confused expression. “What are we doing here?”

Logan sighed as he put the car in park. He looked at the big brown doors that he’d have to cross and explain to those inside he was from the future. You were going to find out whether he liked it or not, but he could keep some of the facts away from you.

“I… Oh, God,” he muttered, running his hand down his face. You moved so that you could face him better. “I need you to trust me.”

“Okay, you're really scaring me with how much you’re saying that,” you told him.

“It’s just. I… we… there’s this mission--"

“A mission?”

Logan easily picked up how your heart sped up in fear. “No—well, yes. I… there's something I need to do before we go into hiding. It will ensure that we will be safe.”

“Okay. What do we have to do?”

“There's someone we have to stop from dying and someone we have to stop from getting captured. In there,” he motioned to the mansion, "are people who can help us."

“Then let's go."

“No, honey—“ His reached out and took your arms to stop you from moving; neither of you noticed the term of endearment. “I need you to stay out here. I’ll get you went it’s safe."

“If it's not safe, you need me.”

Logan's face softened at your concern. To him, you hadn’t been dead for very long, but seeing your younger self like this made him miss you terribly. "Give me thirty minutes. Then you can barge in all hot and fiery."

His words made you nervous, in a good way. You looked away slightly. Logan was proud of himself to know that he could get you easily flustered. Logan's hands gave your arms a light squeeze before he pulled away. The urge to kiss you—anywhere--was strong. He clenched his jaw, giving you a grunt and a nod before exiting the car. Logan waltzed toward the door and gave it a hard knock. It didn’t take long before a young man that Logan didn't recognize opened the door.

“Can I help you?” the man asked, opening the door enough for Logan to see him.

“Uh, yeah," Logan responded, glancing around. "What happened to the school?"

“The school's been shut for years. Are you a parent?"

Logan scoffed. "I sure as hell hope not. Who are you?”

“I’m Hank. Hank McCoy. I look after the house now.”

Logan took off his sunglasses in disbelief, a small smirk on his lips. “You're Beast? Look at you. I guess you're a late bloomer."

"I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.” Hank pushed the door closed, but Logan quickly stopped it.

“So where’s the Professor?"

“There's no professor here.”

“You’re pretty strong for a scrawny kid. You sure there's not a little Beast in there? Come on, Beast.”

“No, he's not here.”

“Come on, Beastie.”

“No.”

Logan shoved the door open and entered the school.

You got out of the car and stared at the shutting door. You glanced at the watch on your wrist, hating how slow time moved. Tapping on the roof of the car, you tried not to barge in there. You wanted answers, actual answers. You could tell that James was holding something back from you, but you couldn’t tell what. Looking around the area, you decided to take a walk. You needed time to think anyway.

~~~

After a brief fight with Hank, causing him to turn into his blue beast form, Charles appeared, walking down the stairs. Logan was laid out on the table in the middle of the entryway while Hank was hanging from the chandelier by his large feet.

“Hank?” Charles called. “What's going on here?”

“Professor?” Logan questioned, in shock that Charles was walking.

“Please don't call me that.”

“Why? You know this guy?” Hank questioned.

“Yeah, he looks slightly familiar. Get off the bloody chandelier, Hank.” Hank did as was asked and jumped down.

“You can walk," Logan stated, sitting up.

“You're a perceptive one."

“I thought Erik—“

“Which makes it slightly perplexing that you missed our sign on the way in.” Charles sat on the steps, drink in hand. “This is private property, my friend. I’m gonna have to ask him to ask you to leave.”

“Well,” Logan got off the table, "I'm afraid I can’t do that because, uh, I was sent here for you."

“Tell whoever it was that sent you that I'm busy."

“That's gonna be a little tricky because the person who sent me was you."

“What?"

“About 50 years from now.” Charles broke into laughter. "I know. Stay with me.”

"Like in the future, 50 years from now?”

"Yeah."

"I sent you from the future?”

“Yeah."

“Piss off."

"If you had your powers, you'd know I was telling the truth.”

“How do you know I don't have my p--Who are you?”

“I told you.”

“Are you CIA?”

“No.”

“You’ve been watching me?”

“I know you, Charles. We’ve been friends for years. I know you powers came when you were 9. I know you thought you were going crazy when it started, all the voices in your head. And it wasn't until you were 12, that you realized all the voices were in everyone else's head. Do you want me to go on?"

“I never told anyone that."

"Not yet, no, but, you will."

“All right, you’ve piqued my interest. What do you want?”

“We have to stop Raven. I need your help… we need your help.”

“I think I’d like to wake up now.”

“What does she have to do with this?” Asked Hank.

Logan went onto explain who Raven killed and what happened after. They were now in the next room, sitting down.

“So you’re saying they took Raven’s power, and what?” Charles tried to recap. “They weaponized it?”

“Yep,” Logan responded.

“She is unique," Hank said.

“Yeah, she is, Hank," Charles agreed.

“In the beginning, the Sentinels were just targeting mutants. Then they began to identify the genetics in non-mutants,” Logan explained, “who would eventually have mutant children and grandchildren. Many of the humans tried to help us, but it was a slaughter. Leaving only the worst of humanity in charge. I've been in a lot of wars. I'd never seen anything like this. And it all starts with her."

“Let's just say for the sake of... the sake, that I choose to believe you, that I choose to help you. Raven won't listen to me." Charles sighed. “Her heart and soul belong to someone else now."

“I know. That's why we're gonna need Magneto, too."

“Erik?” Hank clarified with a laugh. “You do know where he is?"

“Yeah.”

Charles was laughing as well. “Could you give me that one more time, please?”

“You heard me.”

“He’s where he belongs.” Charles got up and headed out of the room.

Logan stood up. “You’re just gonna walk out?"

“Ooh, top marks. Like I said, you are perceptive.”

“The Professor I know would never turn his back on someone who'd lost their path. Especially someone he loved.”

“You know,” Charles turned around, “I think I do remember you now. Yeah. Tall, angry fellow with the contentious hair.” Charles walked up to Logan. “We came to you a long time ago, seeking your help. And I’m gonna say to you what you said to us then. Fuck off.”

“Listen to me, you little shit,” Logan was rapidly growing angry, which he knew wasn’t a good thing to keep his hold on this past. “I’ve come a long way, and I’ve watched a lot of people die. My own wife died in my arms just minutes before I was sent back here. If you’re gonna wallow in self-pity and do nothing, then you’re gonna watch the same thing, you understand? My wife’s death is on your hands.”

“We all have to die sometime.” Charles turned and headed up the stairs.

“Told you there was no professor here,” Hank sighed.

“What the hell happened to him?” Logan asked, never having thought his friend could be like this.

“He lost everything. Erik, Raven, his legs.” Hank sighed. “We built the school, the labs, this whole place… then, just after the first semester, the war in Vietnam got worse. Many of the teachers and older students were drafted. It broke him. He retreated into himself. I wanted to help, do something… so I designed a serum to treat his spine, derived from the same formula that helps me control my mutation. I take just enough to keep myself balanced, but he takes too much. I tried easing him back, but he just couldn't bear the pain, the voices. The treatment gives him his legs, but it’s not enough. He’s… He's just lost too much.”

~~~

Charles was lounging in bed, thinking of Logan’s predicament and Raven when he felt it. He groaned in pain as someone’s thoughts penetrated his mind. Someone close. He stood up and went over to the large window where he saw you wandering through the overgrown gardens. Your thoughts weren’t clear to Charles due to the treatment for his legs, but you were the first person whose internal thoughts were even close to being heard in a year. He wanted to know who you were, though he had a sneaking suspicion.

“Logan!” Charles called from the top of the stairs. “Did you come here with anyone?”

“Uh, yes,” Logan responded.

“She's your wife, isn't she?”

“She will be."

“Does she know about your current state?”

“No… and she shouldn’t.”

“Well, currently, she's wandering through the gardens.”

“What?” Logan went to hurry out the door. Charles could tell that Logan's concern for you was genuine.

“Logan, wait."

Logan stopped and turned. “I’ll help you get Raven. No for any of your future shit, but for Raven.”

“Fair enough."

"But I'll tell you this. You don't know Erik. That man is a monster. A murderer. You think you can convince Raven to change? To come home? That's splendid. But what makes you think you can change him?”

“Because you and Erik sent me back here together… I need to grab Y/N, but you need to know that she can't know about the truth. To her, this is a mission. I can't change the future more than I already have.”

“Then why did you bring her?" Hank wondered.

“Because he's already lost her once," Charles said knowingly. “We'll do our best to keep it a secret.”

Chapter Text

Your hands were itching to burn up as you let thirty minutes pass. You were in the back of the mansion, walking through what you figured were once perfectly manicured gardens. James had yet to emerge, and you were growing concerned.

“Y/N!” You heard his concerned voice before you could see him. He came jogging up to you, eyes checking you over. “You needed to wait by the car."

“Why?” You asked. “It's not like I can't handle myself."

“Because you don't know this place.”

“And you do?”

Logan sighed. “Let’s just go inside. We have a plan to form.”

Logan went to reach for your hand but quickly realized he shouldn’t and stuffed them into his leather jacket pockets. He led you around the mansion and inside. You quickly noticed two men standing around the table in the entryway with blueprints on the table.

“Charles, Hank, this is my wif—this is Y/N,” Logan introduced, coughing to try and cover up his mistake. Your head snapped to face James as you caught his mistake.

“Nice to meet you, Y/N,” Charles pulled your attention, holding out his hand. “I'm Charles Xavier."

You tentatively shook his hand. “Nice to meet you,” you mumbled. Logan stuffed his hands further into his pockets as he sensed how on edge you were. He wanted to reach over and pull you close, but knew he shouldn't.

“And this is my friend, Hank McCoy.”

“Hello,” Hank greeted.

“Hi,” you replied. You stepped up to the table and looked at the blueprints. “Wait… these are for the Pentagon. What are you doing with these?”

“We, uh,” Logan reached up and scratched the back of his neck. “We kinda need to break someone out.”

“Wait? James. You can’t be serious. I thought you said that we were protecting someone from dying and someone from getting captured. We—we’re done with this life. I thought that—"

“I know, sweetheart.” Logan placed his hands on your arms, trying to ground your racing thoughts. “One last job. Then we’re free.”

“You promised… I didn’t think that this mission would mean this. Breaking someone out of the Pentagon.”

Logan could see it in your eyes. The trust you had put in him was slipping away. “This job will ensure that we are safe. I promise.”

You studied James with a hesitancy that made you want to run. “Okay…”

Logan gave your arms a light squeeze before he ran his hands down your arms and pulled away. “Okay,” he turned to focus on the table, "what do we know?”

“The room they're holding him in was built during the Second World War, when there was a shortage of steel,” Hank explained. “So the foundation is pure concrete and sand. No metal.”

“He's being held a hundred floors beneath the most heavily guarded building on the planet,” Charles added.

“Who is being held?” you asked.

“His name is Erik Lehnsherr.”

“What?” You looked at James. “You’re a serious idiot if you think it's wise to break him out.”

“Why is Erik in there?” Logan wondered.

“What do you mean why is he in there? Don't you remember?"

“Uh,” he glanced at the other two men for help, in which there was none. “Jog my memory.”

“Erik Lenhsherr killed JFK.”

“He killed…?”

"What else explains a bullet miraculously curving through the air?” Charles chuckled. “Erik's always had a way with guns. Are you sure you want to carry on with this?” The way Charles looked at James filled you with uneasiness.

“This is your plan, not mine.”

James’ answer had you tilting your head in confusion.

“We don't have any resources to get us in,” Hank said.

“Or out,” Charles added. “It’s just me and Hank.”

“I knew a guy,” Logan said. “Yeah, he'd be a young man now. Grew up outside of D.C.” He chuckled, and his eyes looked like he was reliving a memory in his mind. You stared at him, taking in his words, which didn't sit right with you. It was all past tense, yet he said that the person was a young man. "He could get into anywhere. I just don’t know how the hell we're gonna find him."

“Is Cerebro out of the question?” Hank asked Charles quietly. Charles looked away, causing Hank to sigh.

“If only you guys had internet.”

“What’s internet?” you asked.

“Uh, something from the military. Yeah.”

“We have a phone book,” offered Hank.

“Sure. Grab it.”

Hank walked off, and Charles turned his attention to you. He was studying you like he could read your mind, making you want to shrink away. Logan noticed you taking a step back, and he took a step toward you.

“And what's your mutation, Y/N?” Charles wondered.

“Uh, I have a healing ability, nothing compared to James, but it gets the job done,” you answered. “I also can create and control fire." You turned a hand around, palm up, and formed a flame.”

“Beautiful.”

“You’re forgetting one, sweetheart,” Logan said.

You looked at James, confused. “No, I’m not,” you responded.

“Yes, you're forgetting your ability to—“ Logan cut himself off as he remembered that you didn't know about that ability and you wouldn’t for another thirty years. “Nevermind. I was thinking of someone else.”

“No, you weren't." You crossed your arms over your chest. “What are you not telling me?"

“I’m going to help Hank,” Charles muttered before hurrying off.

“Princess, I’m—"

“Princess?” You repeated. “What are with these nicknames? And this plan? What are we doing here, James? I’m serious. If you don't tell me the truth, I am going to walk out that door and you'll never see me again.”

“No, sweetheart, please,” Logan lunged forward and took your hands in his. “You just need to trust me. I know I keep saying that, but I mean it. I'm trying to protect you here. I’m trying to save us… save you.”

“James… what are you talking about? I’m right here.”

“Yes, but the Sent—but Stryker is still out there. You and I both know that he won’t give us a break. Doing this will give him something else to worry about and then we are off. Anywhere and everywhere.” The way you were staring back at him, Logan could tell that you were still on the verge of leaving. “Give me a week. One week. If after that you don't trust me anymore, you can run.”

“One week. Not a second more.”

You tore your hands free from his grip and followed after Charles and Hank. Logan sighed, hands on his hips and head hanging. It hadn't even been twenty-four hours and the mission was moving at a snail's pace while you were slipping through his fingers. He was growing concerned that he was changing too much of your shared past and that it would change your relationship permanently.

~~~

The four of you ended up in a suburb outside of D.C. You still didn't understand how James knew of this young man, but you were going with it.

“Here, here, here," Logan said, trying to get Charles to stop the car.

“Where?” Charles wondered.

“Just stop here!”

“All right, all right.” He pulled over and parked in front of the house Logan had pointed out.

Logan got out of the car and quickly opened your door. Without even a second thought, Logan grabbed your arm and gently guided you out of the car. You were growing more confused with every passing second. Logan, realizing what he had done, quickly pulled away and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

“Next time, I'm driving,” Logan muttered, leading the way to the door.

After Logan knocked at the door, an annoyed woman answered it.

“What’s he done now?” She asked with a sigh. “I will just write you a check for whatever he took.”

“We just need to talk to him,” Logan stated.

The woman turned around with a sigh. “Peter, the cops are here. Again.”

She let your group in. Logan placed a hand on the small of your back, protectively, as you headed further into the house. A young girl dressed up in play clothes looked up at the two of you.

“I’m a princess," she said. “What are you?”

Logan took his glasses off with a small smirk. “I’m the Wolverine,” he answered. "Where's your brother?”

She pointed to a basement door, and the four of you headed down.

“The Wolverine?” you questioned quietly to James.

“Shit,” he muttered. This whole thing was harder than he thought. “It's a Canadian folk tale. Victor used to call me that in the army.”

“He did? I never heard him say that.”

“Yeah, well, there's a lot of things you don't know.”

The way you drew in a sharp breath had Logan instantly regretting his words. At this point in your timeline, the two of you were still getting to know each other, so it wasn't like it was a lie. It was just a reminder that you trusted someone to save you, who you didn't really know.

Pulling away from James, you headed down the stairs faster. When you reached the bottom of the stairs, you saw a young man playing ping-pong by himself. His mutation was clearly super speed, and he was using it to quickly go between the two sides to hit the ping-pong ball.

“What do you guys want?” The young man asked. “I didn’t do anything.” He zipped from the ping-pong table to the couch behind you. “I've been here all day."

“Just relax, Peter. We’re not cops,” Logan told him.

"Of course, you're not. If you were, you wouldn't be driving a rental car."

“How did you know we’ve got a rental car?” Charles asked.

“I checked your registration when you were walking to the door. I also had some time to kill so I went through your rental agreement. Saw you were from out of town. Are you FBI?” Peter zipped passed Charles, taking his wallet and looking through it. “No, you’re not cops. Hey, what's with this gifted youngsters place?” Peter dropped the wallet and the card he had taken out of it before zipping away.

“That’s an old card.”

"He's fascinating,” Hank smiled.

“He’s a pain in the arse.”

“What, a teleporter?”

“No, he's just fast,” Logan said. “And when I knew him, he wasn't so... young.”

“When you knew him?” You repeated.

“Y/N—“

“I’m going to wait outside.”

You marched up the stairs and headed outside. Your body was heating up, threatening to fire you into a human torch. That man inside wasn't your James, though he may look like him. There was something going on that you were being left in the dark about, and you were not okay with that. Who knows how long you were out there until you heard the familiar sound of James' boots.

“Please don't leave.” His voice was more broken than you had ever heard it.

You closed your eyes, trying to shove down the feelings you had for the man. “I’m not… I just needed to cool down."

Logan nodded despite the fact that you weren't able to see it. “Sweetheart—“

“Go get Peter’s help. I’m going to stay out here.”

Logan sighed. He was losing you with each word that slipped from his mouth. He took a step toward you. “The kid will help us.”

“Okay.”

“I, uh, I think you should—“ Logan stopped himself before finishing the thought. He believed that you should stay with Hank during the plan, but he knew if he made that decision for you, he would only be pushing you further away. “Do you want to stick with Hank on the mission or Charles and I?"

He surprised you that he was giving you a choice. Normally, on missions, James would insist that you would stick with the safer option. That would be with Hank. He was giving you an option, like an olive branch. Slowly, you turned around.

“You’ll let me stay with you?" you asked cautiously.

“If that's what you want,” he replied.

“And, if needed, you won’t stop me from fighting alongside you?” You could see the thought of you fighting weighed on him. “If you’re insisting that we do this mission for our safety, then you can't say no."

“I won't stop you.” He slowly walked over to you. “I’m sorry that I’m putting you in danger when I promised to keep you safe.”

He reached for you, stopping before he could make contact with your waist. He could feel the heat radiating off of you, reminding him that you were standing there alive while a version of you was cold and dead in an unmarked grave.

“You keep doing that,” you stated.

“Uh?”

“Touching me, not touching me. It's... new.”

“I’m sorry.” His hands were quickly stuffed in his pockets. “Just worried."

“Hey, lovebirds!" Peter exclaimed, zipping over. “Our we breaking into the Pentagon or what?”

~~~

Logan, you, Charles, and Hank entered the Pentagon as though you were on a tour. Peter zipped away to go start his part of the plan. Not long into the tour, Logan, you, and Charles slipped away, leaving Hank to fulfill his part while still on the tour. The three of you headed down to the lower levels, to the kitchen. With a flick of your wrist, you caused every burner in the kitchen to go up in flames, triggering the fire alarm and the sprinklers. Logan couldn't help but smirk as the three of you went into the kitchen and saw your handy work. The flames were not dulling with the water as you were still fully in control.

“Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,” Charles exclaimed, taking charge, "this is a Code Red situation. We are evacuating the entire floor so that my associates and I can, uh, secure the prison.”

The kitchen staff rushed out of the room, leaving the two guards at the elevator.

“Who are you?" One of the guards questioned, stepping forward.

“We’re special operations, CB-FB-CID,” Charles lied. “Perhaps you didn't hear me when first I spoke, but it is imperative that you understand we're in a complete lockdown situation. We have to get you to the third floor—“

Logan lunged forward, annoyed. He punched one of the guards in the gut before grabbing a nearby frying pan and quickly using it to knock out the guards. You couldn’t help but bite your lip as you watched.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Logan said, turning to Charles. “Were you finished?” His eyes caught sight of you staring at him, the fires growing behind you. He smirked. “Uh, sweetheart, the fire."

“Oh!” You exclaimed, quickly extinguishing the flames. “Sorry."

“I’m sorry,” Charles cut in. He grabbed a key from one of the guards and inserted it into the hole near the elevator. “I’m just not very good with violence.”

The elevator bell dinged, causing Charles to turn around. Standing there was Peter and Erik with a security guard duck taped to the wall.

“Charles?” Erik questioned.

Before anything else could happen, Charles punched Erik in the face. Erik fell back onto the floor as Charles groaned in pain.

“Good to see you too, old friend,” Erik groaned. “And walking."

“No thanks to you,” Charles spat as Erik stood up.

“You’re the last person in the world I expected to see today.”

“Believe me, I wouldn't be here if I didn't have to. If we get you out of here, we do it my way. No killing.”

“No helmet. I couldn’t disobey you even if I wanted."

“I’m never getting inside of that head again. I need your word, Erik.”

“Nobody move!” A guard shouted as a group of them ran into the room with plastic guns drawn. Logan protectively stepped in front of you. “Hold it right there!”

“Charles,” Erik muttered.

“Don’t move! Hands up, or we will shoot!"

"Freeze them, Charles.”

"I can’t,” Charles replied. Erik held his hands up, causing the metal to move. “No!”

The guards fired on your group. But within a blink of an eye, all the guards were taken down, and Peter was across the room. The bullets that should have hit you all, hit the elevator door, causing you to jump. Without a second thought, Logan was turned around, and his hands were gently cupping your face.

“Honey, are you okay?” He fretted over you. You could see the genuine fear in his eyes, scaring you. His heart was hammering in his chest with the fear that he could lose you, completely losing your future relationship. “Are you hurt?”

Your hands came up to his wrists, gently grasping them. "James, I'm fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m am… are you okay?”

He nodded, pulling his hands away from you. “As long as you are.” You could tell that those words held something deeper, something he wasn't telling you that was beyond this ridiculous mission.

“Are you sure?”

“Like I said, as long as you are okay, I am too.”

Chapter Text

Logan sent you and Peter to get the car while Erik was told the reason that he had been broken out of the Pentagon. Once you returned with the car, everyone loaded up, and you headed to a private airport. A private airport was waiting on the runway when you arrived.

“Uh, do any of you know how to fly this thing?” you asked, eying the nice plane.

“I do,” Hank said, heading up the stairs. “I’ll get everything ready.”

You looked over at James. “This is our second flight in a day, and this is much longer. Are you sure you'll be okay?”

Logan could have melted at the concern shining through in your eyes. “You’ll sit with me?”

“Of course.”

“Then I’ll be just fine, sweetheart.”

Keeping his eyes locked on yours, Logan slowly reached forward and took your hand. Your breath caught at the feeling of your hand in his. He had held your hand before, but something was different about this. Logan gave your hand a light squeeze before guiding you up the steps and onto the private plane. As much as Logan wanted to sit beside you and hold you tight, he knew that he was already pressing too much. He led you to a seat and then sat across from you with a small table between.

Erik entered the plane soon after and reached for the newspaper that rested on the small table between you and Logan. Logan quickly pinned the newspaper to the table with his claws.

“Imagine if they were metal,” Erik scoffed, walking to one of the back seats.

Logan bit down a remark as he pulled out a cigar. He went to light it, but you quickly killed the flame from his lighter.

“Are you really going to do that while we all sit in this cramped plane?” You asked, exasperated.

“What? It’s not illegal yet,” Logan retorted.

Your brows creased together. “You make it sound like someday it will be.”

“Uh, well, yeah, because of people like you who don't like the smell.”

“Right.”

“So you really won’t let me light it?”

“Not a chance, James.”

His lips tugged into a small smile, barely there, as he put the lighter and cigar back in his pocket. “Then how am I going to survive this flight?”

“Here,” you reached your hand across the table and wiggled your fingers. “Take it.”

Logan didn't waste a second in placing his hand in yours. At the same time, Charles entered the plane and went to the back to sit down. Hank got the plane in the air, causing Logan to grip your hand tighter. The silence in the plane was almost suffocating as Charles glared at Erik.

“How did you lose them?” Erik asked Charles.

“The treatment for my spine affects my DNA,” Charles explained.

“You sacrificed your powers so you could walk?!”

“I sacrificed my powers so I could sleep.” Charles shook his head. “What do you know about it?”

"I've lost my fair share.”

Charles let out a cold laugh. “Dry your eyes, Erik. It doesn't justify what you’ve done.”

“You have no idea what I've done.”

"I know you took the things that meant the most to me."

“Well, maybe you should have fought harder for them."

Charles and Erik stood up to be face-to-face. "If you want a fight, Erik, I will give you a fight!"

"Sit down!” Logan demanded.

“Let him come," Erik responded.

Charles seized Erik by the front of his shirt. "You abandoned me!” He exclaimed. “You took her away, and you abandoned me!”

“Angel. Azazel. Emma. Banshee,” Erik grew angrier with each name, his powers beginning to control the plane. “Mutant brothers and sisters, all dead! Countless others experimented on, butchered!”

Erik's powers rattled the plane and set it on a downward trajectory. The force caught you off guard, sending you flying sideways out of your seat. Logan's grip on your hand was the only thing to keep you from hitting your head. With a groan, Logan pulled you into his lap.

“Hold on to me,” Logan mumbled.

Your arms slipped around his neck as he held tightly to the table to keep you both in place. You tried to remain calm at how it felt to be in his lap and this close. You took a deep breath to keep your heart and powers at bay.

"Where were you, Charles?!” Erik continued. Charles was holding onto the ceiling and a seat to try and not fly around.

“Erik!” Hank shouted as he tried to regain control of the plane.

”We were supposed to protect them! Where were you when your own people needed you?! Hiding! You and Hank! Pretending to be something you're not! You abandoned us all!”

“ERIK!”

Erik relinquished control of the plane. “You abandoned us all.”

Both Charles and Erik were panting as they stared each other down. Unable to take it anymore, Charles went up and took the pilot seat next to Hank. Logan’s hands came up to cup your face, his eyes frantically scanning for any sign of injury.

“I'm okay," you told him, grabbing his wrists and giving them a little squeeze.

“You sure?" He still was looking you over.

“Yes. Are you okay?”

Logan’s eyes finally met yours. “Yeah. Just great.”

You nodded, not believing him. “I’m going to use the restroom.” You pushed off of him and slipped into the nearby restroom.

Logan sighed, fixing his position in his seat. “So, you were always an asshole."

Erik scoffed. “I take it we're best buddies in the future,” he turned and responded.

Logan chuckled. “I spent a lot of years trying to bring you down, bub.”

“How does that work out for you?”

“You’re like me. You’re a survivor.” Logan looked around at the mess left due to Charles and Erik's argument. “Do you wanna pick all that shit up?"

The conversation died down, silence filling the plane. Including you, frozen in the restroom as you overheard their conversation. The future? Is that why James was acting so strange? But then... why—how did he look the same? Was this all a trap? This was a conversation you needed to have with James alone and not in the middle of the air with strangers. Except, these people didn't seem like strangers to him. Taking a deep breath, you needed to bury down the fear and anxiety that was bubbling up inside of you. You slipped out of the restroom and sat back in your seat.

Logan knew you too well. The second his eyes fell on you, he knew something was wrong. His brows pinched together as he leaned forward, trying to catch your eye, but he could tell you were avoiding it.

“Sweetheart, what's wrong?” He whispered.

The question was something you noted. The two of you had known each other for less than a year, and he was asking like he knew you like the back of your hand.

“I’m fine," you replied. “Just tired.” You moved to curl up in the chair.

“Y/N—“

“I’m fine, James," you snapped. "Let me get some rest."

Logan watched as you curled up and closed your eyes. An anxious knot formed in his stomach. He was going to lose you at this rate, and he didn't even know how to fix it without completely making it worse. As soon as he could tell that you were asleep, he pulled off his leather jacket, stood up, and carefully placed it on top of you. Logan couldn't control himself as he leaned down and placed a kiss on the top of your head. Tears threatened to overtake his eyes as he thought that this could be the last gentle moment he had with you. He needed to savor it.

“You love her,” Erik stated quietly from where he was sitting.

Logan grunted in response as he sat back down. “In the future, she's my wife.”

“Is she waiting with the future versions of Charles and I?”

“She died. The Sentinels killed her right before I was sent back here.”

“Makes more sense now. You're not doing this for anyone else. You're doing this for her."

“Everything I will ever do is for her.”

~~~

You were thankful to wake up almost in Paris. Though the woodsy smell of James' cigars instantly overtook your senses. His leather jacket was draped over you. Glancing over at him, you saw him awake, staring out the window. You sat up, pulling the jacket off of you.

“Sleep well?” he asked, looking at you.

“Fine,” you replied. “For a chair.” You reached over and handed him the jacket. “Thanks."

“Any time.”

~~~

Your anxiety was growing with each second. Logan could sense it. But each time he tried to move closer to help you out, you moved away. That’s how you ended up sitting between Charles and Hank in the back seat while Logan drove and Erik sat in the passenger seat. The five of you hurried through the building once you arrived there. Flames flickered at your fingertips as you tried to calm down.

When you arrived at the meeting room, the blue woman you assumed was Raven was on the large table, aiming a gun at the smaller man in the corner. Your eyes moved, finding the still-conscious man on the ground near you. You stumbled back.

“Stryker," you gasped.

“Raven,” Erik called, causing Raven to pause and ignore what was going on with you.

Stryker smirked and quickly pulled out a contraption, shooting you with it. You screamed out as you began to be electrocuted. Logan roared, stepping forward as you writhed in pain. But suddenly, his mind grew hazy, and he stumbled back. Erik quickly took out Stryker and disarmed Raven. Logan’s breaths were coming short and desperate as he slid down the wall. The memories of what Stryker did to the two of you–his past, your future–played out in his mind. Logan couldn’t control it as his claws pushed through his knuckles. He could feel the tug to return to his own time, but he needed to fight. He needed to complete the mission. He needed to get to you. But for a moment, Logan’s 2023 conscience slipped away.

You stayed on the ground, the commotion around you becoming a blur as you whimpered in pain. Between both of you panicking, you and Logan missed Erik trying to kill Raven, and Raven escaped from the window.

“Where am I?" Logan panted, standing up.

“Huh?” Charles barely registered the question.

“How the hell did I get here?”

“What? You came to us."

“Who are you?”

“Charles.” Logan gripped his shoulder tightly. “Charles Xavier!”

“I don’t know you.”

“Huh?” Hank, in his Beast form, stood up behind Charles.

“What the hell is that? And where's... Y/N? Where’s Y/N?"

“She’s over there.”

As Logan rushed over to your side, Charles urged Hank to go stop Erik from hurting Raven.

“Y/N,” Logan pulled you into his arms.

“James?” you muttered.

Logan noticed Stryker unconscious beside you. “No. We need to get out of here.” He hoisted you up in his arms and glared at Charles. “Did you lead us here? To this trap?"

“What? No!" Charles exclaimed. “You're Logan, that's Y/N. I'm Charles Xavier. You spent the last couple of days with me and my friends.”

“Why?” Logan groaned as his head pounded. With a blink, Logan panted, and his 2023 consciousness was back. “Professor?”

“What happened to you?”

Logan looked down at you and then over at Stryker. He wanted to kill him, but he couldn't risk the timeline as much as he was already risking. “That man will cause a lot of pain to me and Y/N.”

“James,” you cried in his arms.

Logan tightened his grip around you and shushed you. “I've got you, sweetheart. You're safe now… I have you.” He quickly looked around. “Where’s Raven?"

“Gone."

“What?" Sirens began blaring in the distance, coming closer.

“We have to get out of here.”

Logan, still holding you tightly to his chest, followed Charles out of the building and through the panicking streets. The three of you met up with Hank and headed back to the airport. As soon as you were on the plane, you peeled yourself from Logan and curled up on a chair in the corner.

“Y/N—"

“Don’t,” you rasped, trying to hold back the onslaught of emotions. You looked up at him, tears gathering in your eyes. “I… I don't even know what to say to you."

He sat down across from you. “I’m sorry—"

“Who are you?”

“You know who I am."

"No, I don't. We’ve barely known each other for a year, and I chose to run away with you with the promise that you'd protect me. But days ago, we woke up, and you weren't the same person. You’re talking weird—in the past tense. This mission isn't adding up. Then Stryker… we walked right into a trap. So, you are not my James. Who are you?”

“I... I can’t… I can’t tell you.”

"Then I'm gone as soon as this plane lands.”

“No, please." His hands grasped yours like his life depended on it. "Please, don’t leave. I’ll do anything.”

“Then tell me the truth.”

Logan sighed. “I am your James. This is his body, but my conscience… my conscience was sent back from fifty years in the future.”

“The future?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because a war is coming. A war that destroys the world... destroys my world. But I can stop it. Well, I thought I could.”

“I need something more. What you are saying could all be a lie."

Logan sighed, thinking of something that would get you to believe him. “The night you found out about your mutation. Your father killed your mother. He believed you and her were monsters. You killed him and—"

“Enough," you yanked your hands out of Logan's grip. “I believe you.”

“Are you… are you going to leave?"

You stayed quiet for a moment, studying his eyes. You knew that if you truly wanted to, Logan would let you walk away. But you could tell that it would break his heart. There was something he was still keeping from you, something that was his true motive for doing this. You weren’t going to pressure him, though. It was a secret he obviously held too close to his heart to share.

“I don’t know," you whispered. “I need some space.”

“Okay,” he nodded, standing up. “Just... let me know if you need anything.”

You watched as Logan walked to the opposite side of the plane. His shoulders were slumped forward. He was sad, more sad than you had ever seen. It made you want to wrap him up and hold him close, but you couldn’t. Not when everything was so messed up right now.

~~~

Logan had never felt so anxious before. He didn't know what you would choose. To stay with him and give him a chance to make things right, or to walk away and possibly ruin any future with him. A part of him finally breathed when the plane landed, and you got into the car with the others. Logan could breathe a little bit more when you walked into the mansion with them.

Charles grunted, collapsing to his knees in the entryway of the mansion.

"What happened?” Logan asked, rushing to Charles' side with Hank.

“Come on,” Hank muttered, holding Charles up.

“Why can't he walk?" You asked.

“He needs his treatment," Hank responded.

“Hank, I can hear them," Charles complained in pain as Hank moved him to sit up against the wall.

“I know. It's okay."

“Can you make it stop?"

“I'll get them.” Hank rushed off.

Charles’ hands went to both sides of his head as he squeezed his eyes shut and let out a groan.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Logan said. "Pull yourself together."

“James!” You exclaimed.

“It's not over yet."

Panting, Charles opened his eyes and looked into Logan's. "You don't believe that," he retorted.

“How do you know that?”

“As these go,” Charles motioned to his legs. “This…” he touched the side of his head, "comes back. They all come back.”

“Look, I’m… I’m still here…” He glanced your way as you crouched next to Charles. “And she’s still out there. We need your help, Charles. Not like this. I need you. We can’t find Raven. Not without your powers.”

Hank's quick footsteps cut in as he joined you beside Charles. "I added a little extra because you missed a dose,” he stated.

Logan watched as Charles took the syringe. “Charles.”

The man placed it against his arm and caught Logan’s gaze again. Then he looked to you. In the brief moments that Charles had regained his powers, he had seen you in Logan’s mind. The future you. Just glimpses. He could feel the love that Logan had for you. The respect and admiration and the fear that he may never see you again. With a huff, Charles set the syringe down.

“Uh, Hank, do me a favor,” Charles said, catching his breath. "Would you help me to my study, please?”

“Come on, I got you," Hank helped Charles up.

“I can help,” you offered, coming to his other side.

The three of you headed to the study with Logan following. Hank stopped at a chair near a closet, where you helped Charles into the chair. Hank opened the closet, revealing a wheelchair.

"Are you sure about this?” Hank asked.

“Absolutely not,” responded Charles.

You helped Charles get settled into the wheelchair. Logan and Hank quietly conversed behind you. Charles caught your chin, gently forcing you to look at him.

“You are the most important thing to him," Charles whispered. “He is doing this for you.” You inhaled sharply, taking in Charles' words. “Give him a chance… These may be his last moments with you. Let him have them, no matter what happens.”

“We should head downstairs,” Hank said before you could say anything to Charles.

Charles led the way, controlling his own wheelchair over to the elevator. Logan lingered behind you, wanting to make sure he knew where you were going so that you couldn't slip away without him knowing. You gasped when you arrived downstairs, where it was all sleek, silver metal. You followed Charles down the long hallway to the door at the very end.

“When was the last time you were down here?" asked Logan.

“The last time we went looking for students," Hank answered.

“A lifetime ago,” Charles corrected.

Charles stopped in front of the door. The hole in the door lit up, shining in Charles’ eyes.

“Welcome, Professor," an automated female voice greeted before the door slid open, revealing a large sphere room.

The four of you headed down the walkway to the end. Hank immediately began turning knobs on the control panel as you looked around.

“Raven’s wounds,” Hank stated. “She won't be moving fast.”

Charles picked up the helmet and blew the dust off of it. “These are muscles I haven't stretched in a long time,” he said before slipping the helmet off. He gasped as the room turned into a red-and-white map.

“Wow,” you gasped. "What is this?”

Charles gasped and groaned under the pressure of it all. As he started to scream, the dials on the control panel began exploding. Logan quickly covered you as pieces of glass went flying everywhere.

“Charles!" Hank exclaimed as Charles tore off the helmet. “It’s all right. Are you all right?”

Logan gently grabbed your face, checking you over for injuries. “You hurt?” he asked.

“I’m fine, Jam—Logan. I’m fine," you replied.

His heart cracked a little. “Please, don't do that.”

“Do what?”

“Call me Logan.”

“But everyone else—"

“There will be a time and a place for you to call me Logan. I’m still your James right now. Okay? I need to be your James."

“Okay.”

“I’ll go check the generator,” Hank said, pulling you and Logan from your own little world. He quickly left.

“It's not the machinery, is it?" Logan questioned.

“I can't do this,” Charles shook his head. “My mind—“

“Yes, you can.”

“No. It won't take it.”

“You’re just a little rusty."

“You don't understand. It's not a question of being rusty. I can flip the switches. I can turn the knobs. But my power comes from here." He pointed to his head. “It comes from…” His hand shook above his heart. "And it's broken. I feel like one of my students. Helpless.” Charles turned his wheelchair around and started heading back down the walkway. “It was a mistake coming down here. It was a mistake freeing Erik. This whole thing has been one bloody mistake. I’m sorry, Logan, but they sent back the wrong man."

“You're right.” Charles stopped. “I am. Actually, it was supposed to be you. But I was the only one who could physically make the trip. And, uh,” Logan glanced your way, “And I don’t know how long I've got here. But I do know that a long time ago—actually, a long time from now, I was your most helpless student.” Logan leaned down, gripping the armrests of the chair and getting in Charles' face. “And you unlocked my mind. You showed me what I was. You showed me what I could be. I don't know how to do that for you. You're right. I don't. But I know someone who might. Look into my mind.”

“You saw what I did to Cerebro. You don't want me inside your head."

“There's no damage you can do that hasn't already been done, trust me… Come on.”

Charles placed his hands on either side of Logan's face while you waited with bated breath. Images of Logan’s life—his most painful moments and you, his happiest, filtered through.

“You poor, poor man,” Charles gasped as your final death played before him.

“It wasn't all that bad,” Logan said, shooting you a smirk. "Look past me."

“No, I don't want your suffering. I don't want your future!"

“Look past my future. Look for your future… That’s it… That's it... That's it."

You watched as a tear streamed down Charles' face as he concentrated harder. It took a few silent moments, but eventually, Charles pulled away from Logan. The lights in the hallway flickered on.

“Find what you were looking for?” Logan wondered, a knowing look on his face.

“The powers back on," Hank stated, coming back.

“Yes,” Charles said, looking at Logan, who gave him a small smile. "Yes, it is.”

Charles looked in Cerebro while Logan looked at you. You gave him a small smile, which instantly had Logan’s eyes lighting up. You knew that Logan had to finish this mission, and you'd be by his side until the end.

Chapter Text

You watched in awe as Charles connected to the minds of others to speak to Raven. When the conversation ended, Charles sighed and took off the helmet.

“Where is she?” Logan pressed.

“She’s in an airport, boarding a place,” Charles responded. "She could be going anywhere."

Logan sighed, taking a moment to think. “Get some rest, Charles. We'll track her in the morning and find out exactly where she's going.”

“Feel free to use any of the extra rooms,” Hank offered.

“Thank you,” you said.

Silently, you and Logan headed upstairs. You let him take the lead. Without even realizing it, Logan walked straight to where your room sat in the mansion. Of course, it wasn't your room currently, and you didn't even know it was your room.

“Uh,” Logan opened the room to reveal a queen bed, “take this room. I'll be next door.”

“James,” you caught his arm before he could leave. Your stomach was in knots due to the situation and all the nerves, making being alone sound terrible. “Stay with me?"

Logan could see it in your eyes; you were serious. He didn't question you as he nodded and guided you into the room, shutting the door behind him. “Where do you want me?”

“I know you often sleep on the floor, but… just this once, could you maybe hold me?”

His heart was thundering in his chest. All he wanted to do since he got here was hold you. “Are—Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t be asking if I wasn’t. I just… let me get cleaned up.”

"Of course.”

Logan watched as you slipped into the attached bathroom. He peeled his jacket and boots off before unbuttoning his shirt, leaving him in his jeans and white tank top. He wasn’t planning on sleeping, so getting fully undressed was useless. Logan was already lying on the bed, a cigar twirling through his fingers, when you stepped out in your underwear and a t-shirt you found in the bathroom. You walked over to the bed and slipped underneath the covers before turning to face Logan.

“Are you going to get comfortable?” you wondered.

“Not planning on sleeping,” Logan replied. He wanted to pull you into him, but he didn't want to rush you. He needed to do this had your pace, not his own.

“Oh.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t do what you asked.”

You moved closer, and Logan took that as a sign, pulling you all the way into him. You rested your head against his chest, along with one of your hands.

“I’m sorry," you whispered.

“What for?"

“For whatever happened to me.” Logan inhaled sharply. “You don't have to tell me. But I am sorry… what will happen when you go back?"

“I don’t know.”

“I mean, what will happen to you."

Logan sighed. "The me you were with will come back, and the two of you can continue running.”

“Should we?”

The memories he had of those first years with you in that house in the mountains played out in his mind. “If that's what you want… if you still trust me that way.”

“I… I do…"

“Then run with me. Forget about this and just let things happen.”

“And what if things change so much? And that isn’t possible?"

“Then stay safe. Whatever you do, stay safe.” He moved you both so that he could meet your eyes. “Promise me."

“I promise.” Your eyes flickered to his lips causing you to lightly lick yours. “I guess, someday… we…"

“Yes.”

You laughed. "You didn't even let me finish."

“Don't have to… I know you.”

“Yes, I guess you do.”

“It will take time, but you'll know me, I promise.”

“I’m holding you to that.”

He leaned in and held a kiss to your forehead. Both of you closed your eyes, savoring the moment. “You should get some sleep.”

“Okay… Goodnight, James."

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

~~~

You were sound asleep when Logan finally lit his cigar. He was caught up in his own mind when a knock came at the door.

“Yeah?” he called out as loudly as he could without waking you.

Hank opened the door. “You know that those things can give you cancer?” he said, looking at the cigar. Logan gave him an unphased look, taking another drag. “I’ve done some toxicology tests in the lab, and—“

“You want something?”

“Yeah, I’m… I know it's complicated, and there's probably all kinds of rules and reasons for what you can and can't say, but I was wondering if you could tell me… in the future, do I make it?”

“No."

“Oh. Okay. It’s okay. Thanks." Hank went to close the door.

“Hey, kid?” Hank glanced back in. "It's just the world I came from.”

~~~

You woke up when Logan gasped awake, sitting up. You sat up to meet him.

"Are you okay?” You asked. It seemed like the two of you were constantly asking each together that lately.

His breath was coming out in short spurts, his eyes wide and frantic. “Rogue,” he mumbled. “She's alive… and with her powers.”

“Rogue?”

Logan shook his head, remembering where he was and that you didn't know what he was talking about. “No one… yet.”

Suddenly, Hank burst into the room. “Raven was here," he stated. "I screwed up.”

“Shit.”

You quickly threw on some pants as Logan grabbed his shirt, and you followed Hank down to Cerebro. Charles was already there, looking at the damage Raven had done to the control panel. Hank picked up the broken helmet.

“Can't track her now," he said.

“She’s cut her ties," said Charles.

“Hey, I saw in the news last night that there's going to be an announcement in Washington this afternoon about a new protocol for mutants."

“Show us,” Logan demanded.

After getting dressed for the day, the four of you found yourselves in a small closet full of screens and other technology.

“I set the system I designed to record any news about Paris over all three networks,” Hank explained, “and PBS.”

“All three?” Logan questioned, a hint of sarcasm in this tone. “Wow.”

“Yeah, and PBS.” Hank pushed the needed buttons and a reporter appeared on one of the screens. “Look what I found."

“Tomorrow, in front of the White House,” the reporter began, “the President will make his announcement. He will be joined by Secretary of Defense Laird and has even sought the help of renowned scientist Bolivar Trask, his special advisor, to combat this mutant issue.”

“Raven doesn't realize that if she kills Trask at an event like that…” Charles was thinking out loud, “with the whole world watching—“

Logan looked at you as he spoke up, "Then I came a long way for nothing." The despair that glazed over his eyes caused you to reach over and take his hand. He quickly held your hand tightly.

“And there’s more bad news,” Hank added. "I saw in a report... they found traces of her blood in Paris. For all we know, they already have her DNA, which is all they'd need.”

“To create the Sentinels of the future.”

“There's a theory in quantum physics, that time is immutable. It’s like a river. You can throw a pebble into it and create a ripple, but the current always corrects itself. No matter what you do, the river just keeps flowing in the same direction.”

“What are you trying to say?” Logan’s hand gripped yours tighter, forcing you to bite back a wince.

“What I'm saying is... What if the war is inevitable? What if she's meant to kill Trask? What if this is just simply who she is?"

"Just because someone stumbles, loses their way, doesn't mean they're lost forever,” Charles said softly, sharing a look with Logan. “No, I don't believe that theory, Hank. And I cannot believe that is who she is. Ready the plane. We're going to Washington.”

~~~

“You... you should stay here," Logan said as the two of you stood in the entryway.

“What?" You questioned. “No! You may need my help. I know that I've been practically useless, but—"

“You’re never useless, sweetheart. I just… I can't... I can’t risk losing you.” His head hung. “Not again.”

“James.” You gently took his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. “Did the me you lost let you go into fights alone?”

“No."

“Then I won't either.”

Your thumbs rubbed against his hair-covered cheeks. Logan sighed, closing his eyes and allowing himself to commit this moment to memory. With each passing second, Logan was beginning to believe that there was no going back to you. Your past was already changing just in this moment. Logan placed his hands on your waist and pulled you closer. When he opened his eyes, you immediately noticed that they shone with tears. The man who you believed was all big and tough was trying so hard not to cry.

“I need you to do something for me," Logan’s voice was on the cusp of breaking. "Actually, two things. The first thing I need is for you to promise me to run. If it gets too dangerous, I need you to run.”

“James—"

“No, honey, I need you to promise me this. No arguments.”

You took a deep breath, nodding as your hands slid down his neck to wrap around it. “Okay…. I promise."

“And… the second thing is… I need you to kiss me,” a tear slipped down his cheek. “I know that we shouldn't, but, sweetheart, I... I'm terrified… I don’t know if I'll ever see you again and I need... I just need you to kiss me one more time… please."

You didn't bother responding verbally. Instead, you pulled his head closer until your lips met. At first, the kiss was slow and hesitant. You were trying to wrap your head around who you were kissing while Logan was trying to savor every second. But then, the kiss grew more heated and needier. Logan's hands moved to your back, pulling you closer so that you were completely flushed against him. When the two of you finally broke the kiss, your foreheads moved to lean against each other.

“Thank you,” Logan breathed out.

“We should go," your voice was a lot shakier than you wished.

“Yeah. Okay. Let’s go."

~~~

When you arrived on the plane, you decided to sit with Hank up in the cockpit. Though you did make sure to check if Logan would be alright first. Logan and Charles sat in the back. Logan watched as Charles rubbed his leg like it was uncomfortable.

“You all right?” Wondered Logan.

“Getting there,” Charles responded.

Logan sighed. "Whatever happens today, I have a few things you need to promise me. You've looked into my mind and seen a lot of bad, but you've seen the good, too. The X-Men. Promise me you'll find us.” Logan leaned forward. “Use your power, bring us together. Guide us. Lead us. Storm. Scott. Jean… Y/N. Remember those names. There are so many of us. We will need you, Professor.”

“I'll do my best.”

“Your best is enough. Trust me.”

Charles took Logan's words to heart before asking his question, "What's the other thing?”

Logan looked up at the cockpit door. He could see you talking with Hank. “I need you to protect her. If I’m not able to get her away as soon as 1973 me returns, I need you to take care of her.”

“I can do that… Y/N is truly something special.”

Logan smiled softly. "You have no idea.”

"She's lucky to have someone like you loving her."

“I’m the lucky one."

~~~

Hank pushed Charles through the metal detectors at the security checkpoint on the White House grounds. You waited behind them, with Logan behind you.

“Can I see your invitations, please?” One of the guards requested.

Charles placed his fingers to his head as he responded. “Yes, you may. These three are with me."

“Go ahead."

“Thank you.”

You stepped through the metal detector before turning around and waiting for Logan. You could tell that he was tense, probably because of the whole situation. But when he stepped through, he looked back at the detector is surprise when it didn’t go off.

“Everything okay?" you asked.

“Yeah,” Logan muttered.

“Logan! Y/N!” Charles urged.

“Come on,” Logan took your hand and tugged you along.

The four of you found a spot near the back, with a line of wheelchair ridden soldiers. Each of you were on high alert, searching the area for any sign of Raven, as the event started.

“The President of the United States,” the announcement caused the crowd to cheer.

President Nixon stood at the podium. “My fellow Americans, today we face the gravest threat in our history... mutants. We have prepared for this threat. In the immortal words of Robert Oppenheimer, ‘Behold. The world will never be the same again.’”

Nixon raised his arm and turned around. The large backdrop fell, revealing eight Sentinels. Logan’s hand squeezed yours, like he was trying to remind himself that you were right there. The crowd cheered, and soldiers saluted.

“Raven?” Charles suddenly said out loud. “I have her.” He pointed to the front corner. "There. You see? Secret Service man. Left of the stage."

"Got it," Logan said, letting go of your hand.

“Go.”

Logan looked at you. “Stay with Charles.”

The look in his eyes was giving you no room to argue. “Okay,” you nodded. Then he and Hank were off.

The sound of the Sentinels coming to life at your stomach dropping. They flew up and hovered above the crowd. You watched as they each extended their arms and suddenly began firing. The crowd began screaming and running. The chaos broke Charles' concentration and his grip on Raven. He knew who was doing this.

“ERIK!” Charles screamed as the Sentinels kept shooting, and the crowd ran frantically.

You lifted your hands up and shot flames at two of the Sentinels.

“Y/N!” Logan’s voice roared over the screams.

The Sentinels flew out of your flames, barely affected, as they headed towards what seemed to be a baseball stadium floating in the sky. As it came closer, you saw Erik in the center of it. Pieces of the stadium fell from the sky.

“Charles! Y/N!”

You shoved Charles' chair, throwing him to the side and out of it, as metal crashed down on you, pinning you to the ground. Charles was pinned seconds later. You gasped as the metal impaled you.

“NO!!!” Logan's heart-wrenching screams tore across the sound of crashing metal.

Logan and Hank began running over to where you and Charles were stuck, dodging large pieces of the stadium. Logan’s mind was spiraling. This wasn't supposed to happen. You were supposed to stay safe. He could feel the tug back to 2023 as he panicked and the need to reach you grew, but he would fight it until he couldn't anymore. The ground shook as the stadium finally hit the ground, surrounding the White House. Erik landed with the Sentinels surrounding him, ready to shoot.

“Y/N,” Charles called, feeling your mind in pain. “You're going to be okay.”

“I… I know…" There was blood slipping out of your mouth. Your healing factor wasn't fast enough to stop the damage being done to you.

Logan and Hank, now in his Beast form, tried to fight their way through a Sentinel to get to Erik, Charles, and you. Logan had never been so grateful that he didn't have adamantium in his bones. He was almost to Erik when Erik threw a large cement block with thick metal poles sticking out of it at him. Logan fell forward with a grunt of pain. Erik used his powers to cause the metal poles to impale Logan.

“J—James,” you rasped, struggling to breathe.

Erik lifted Logan up, holding him in the air. “So much for being a survivor,” he stated.

Then he threw Logan up and over the stadium. Logan yelled as he was thrown into the river. The metal and cement sunk him to the bottom. He tried to free himself, his only thought being you. But the metal was too much, and Logan drowned.

“James,” you cried, eyes growing blurry as you began to quickly grow weaker. “No…”

"Stay with me, Y/N,” Charles urged. "You'll be okay."

You couldn’t control it when the darkness took over, and your breathing stopped.

Chapter Text

Logan’s head still felt like it was underwater. It was pounding and foggy. There was soft music playing nearby, barely catching his attention. Slowly, Logan's eyes opened. They struggled to focus on anything everything was blurry. But he was in a room—his room at the mansion. That wasn't possible, right? He was lying on his stomach on top of the already made bed. He was dressed and ready for the day—or had he fallen asleep like this? He couldn't remember. Pushing himself to turn over, he glanced at the alarm clock on the nightside, playing music and projecting a small hologram of the world.

Logan hauled himself off of the bed and out into the hallway. His movements were slow like he was sick or drunk or being weighed down by something. His eyes were barely open, trying to still figure out the haziness he was feeling.

The hallway was bright despite the dark wood, the large windows bringing in the sunlight. Children—Students of various ages were walking around, talking, and using their mutations. Logan’s eyes squinted as he noticed two familiar faces down the hall. Bobby and Marie. They glanced back at Logan, shooting him a smile before they walked off holding hands.

Logan couldn’t get his legs to move faster as he headed down the hall. He paused at one of the classrooms, where Kitty and Colossus were teaching a group of younger students. Nothing was making any sense to him. Was this a dream?

Blinking a few times, Logan turned to continue down the hall. Hank's laughter as the blue beast walked towards him caught Logan's attention.

“Morning, Logan,” Hank greeted with a chuckle as he walked past. “Late start."

Logan couldn't get himself to respond as he stared in shock, eyes tracking Hank as he walked the other way. Logan made it to the stairs. Gripping on the railing, Logan took the stairs slowly, not trusting any of his surroundings. He paused as he saw Storm standing at the bottom, helping a group of students.

“Storm,” he whispered unbelievingly.

He continued to the bottom of the stairs, eyes catching someone leaning in the doorway of the Professor's office. Her fiery red hair and outfit made it obvious who it was.

“Jean,” Logan gasped. But that wasn't possible. Jean was dead. He killed her himself.

Jean looked over and smiled at Logan. “Hey, Logan,” she greeted.

“Jean,” he repeated, still in shock as he made his way over to her.

"Are you okay?” Jean noticed the shocked expression on his face.

“You’re here.”

"Where else would I be?"

Logan’s hand went to touch Jean to see if she was real when a hand caught his arm.

“Whoa,” Scott said, making his presence known. “Easy, pal."

Logan couldn't help but chuckle. “Well, some things never change,” he said. “It's good to see you, Scott."

“Uh-huh,” Scott was clearly confused. He slipped past Logan. “See you later, Jean. Professor.” Then he left.

"Logan, is everything all right?” Jean wondered.

“Yeah," he breathed out. “Yeah, I think it is.”

Jean, still not believing Logan, left to let him talk to the Professor. Charles was sitting behind his desk, reading over something. Logan stepped further into the room.

“You did it," he said.

“Did what?" Charles questioned. “Logan, don't you have a class to teach?"

"A class… to teach?”

“History."

“History... Actually, I could use some help with that.”

“Help with what?”

“Well, pretty much everything after 1973. I think the history I know is a little different.”

“Welcome back."

“It’s good to see you, Charles. It's good to see everyone.”

“Well, I had a promise to keep. You and I have a lot of catching up to do.”

“Yeah.”

"What's the last thing you remember?"

“Uh, drowning. And—Y/N! Where’s Y/N?”

~~~

Logan's legs were not moving fast enough. Charles barely said your location before he was off; no one could stop him. He needed to get to you. He needed to see you alive and breathing. He needed to feel your warmth. Logan rushed into the Danger Room, where you were instructing a group of older students. Not paying any mind to your students, Logan hurried across the room and took you in his arms.

“Logan!” You squealed as he squeezed you tightly. The group of students laughed behind you. His head buried into your neck while his arms pinned yours to your sides. As soon as you felt tears hit your skin, knew that something was wrong. “Uh, class dismissed."

The students quickly gathered their things and left, leaving just the two of you in the Danger Room.

“Logan,” your tone was soft and full of concern, "what's wrong?"

Unable to hold it back anymore, Logan collapsed onto his knees. His arms moved to wrap around your legs as the dam broke and the sobs let loose. You tried to kneel down in front of him, but his grip was unrelenting. Your hands found his hair, gently combing through it.

“Was it a nightmare?” You asked. Only sobs in response. “I'm sorry about our fight and that I caused it… I didn’t mean that you needed to go back to your room… I struggled to sleep, too. You know I can't sleep much without you.”

“It wasn't that," Logan muttered through the tears.

“Then what—“ You stopped with Charles entered your head.

“It’s him,” he said into your mind. “He’s back.”

You gasped, knowing what Charles was talking about. “Oh my gosh, Logan… did you... have you... are you the Logan that came back to 1973?”

Logan’s head nodded against your legs. “Yes.”

“Oh my gosh, Logan!” His grip loosened enough for you to fall to your knees in front of him. You wrapped him up in a hug. “Welcome back.”

“You died… again.”

“I know, I’m so sorry.”

“I drowned, and I didn’t know if I would ever see you again."

"You can't get rid of me that easy, honey.”

Logan pulled back so that he could see your face. “Honey?” He took your left arm and pulled it so that he could see your hand. More tears came as he saw the ring on your finger. “We’re married... You're my wife... I'm your husband.”

“Well—“

You couldn’t get the rest of your thought out with Logan's lips pressed against yours. He was kissing you like he hadn't in years. Which it sure felt that way to him. His hands held your head as your hands went around to his back. You let Logan take the lead. He needed this a lot more than you did. When he began kissing down your neck and his hands started roaming, you let out a laugh.

“We should take this somewhere more private,” you told him.

“Yeah. Okay.”

He kissed your lips before pulling away. He didn't make a move to stand though, as his large, rough hands came up to carefully cradle your head. He sighed, his eyes shining with pure love and tears. You could tell he still had a lot weighing on him.

“What's wrong?” you asked quietly.

His thumbs gently rubbed against your checks. “It’s just… you’re as beautiful as the day I lost you.”

“Logan,” his comment had you suddenly growing shy.

He pecked your lips. “Let's take this somewhere else."

~~~

Logan had carried you up to your room before ravishing your body for hours. He needed to feel you, every inch of you. Eventually, the two of you laid cuddled up in your bed.

“Tell me your story," Logan whispered, his fingers absentmindedly drawing patterns on your skin. “Tell me our story.”

“Well, I died in front of the White House that day,” you began. “I won’t up here in the lab. Charles and Hank informed me of what happened, my phoenix power we didn’t know I had. I tried to find you, but Charles said that things would work out the way they were now supposed to. I had to trust that. So, I’ve been here as a teacher and X-Men member since then.”

“When did I show up?”

“2001. With Rogue. You didn't know who I was; Stryker had erased your memory. He had pulled you from the river that day and kept you for years. It was hard on me when you showed up without your memories, though I knew that would happen. It allowed me to understand how you must have felt for those few days you were there in 1973. You helped us save Rogue from Magneto.”

“So that was still the same?"

“That happened in your timeline, too?”

"Yes, you... you tried to sacrifice yourself for Rogue. I was terrified, though; I didn't fully understand who you were at the time.”

“Yes, so I guess it was the same.”

“What happened next?”

“You left when I woke up. You headed to Alkali Lake. You returned with no new information. Stryker attacked the mansion that night. He took me, Scott, and Charles. You pulled me out of his mind control. I ended Stryker that day.”

“That same thing happened in my timeline, though Jean died that day.”

“Jean saved us. She would have died if it hadn't been for Kurt.”

“Good,” Logan nodded. "Was there a cure made?”

“Yes, but as soon as Hank and Charles realized that it was being made from a mutant child, the government shut it down.”

“Wow. That's definitely a bit different than my version… What happened next?”

“We left for a few years, needing some time to figure us out. You build us a beautiful house in the Canadian mountains. We lived there for years, learning how to have a relationship and be a couple. You proposed there, and we got married. Well, it wasn’t an official marriage. Just some declarations of love between the two of us."

"Do you want to make it official?”

“Seriously?”

“I’ve never been more serious in my entire life, sweetheart. Marry me again. This time for real.”

"Yes, of course, I’ll marry you, James.”

Logan captured your lips with a heated kiss. Still kissing you, he moved to hover over you. You smiled in the kiss before he pulled away, pressing kisses around your face.

“Logan!” You giggled. “I'm not done!”

“The stories can wait, princess. I’ve got to remind my wife again of just how much I love her.”

~~~

You continued telling your story the next morning. Logan learned that the incident in Japan had happened just as the one in his memories. The two of you had ended up on your Hawaii trip, turning to the mansion permanently afterward. The two of you had been there ever since.

“So, you've only died twice?" Logan questioned, the concern pressing on his mind.

“Yes,” you replied, softly caressing his face as the two of you lay in bed, facing each other.

“Good. And you... you know the truth about that power?”

“That it could eventually kill me? Yes. It’s actually the reason why we were fighting the other night. There’s a mission that you deemed too dangerous for me to go. You wanted to bench me.”

“That’s still not gonna change, honey.”

“Yeah, well, I have a feeling that once Charles informs the others of your... condition, you'll be benched too.”

“As long as you're by my side, I really don't care.”

You smiled before pressing a kiss to his nose. “You’re just a big softie, aren't you?”

“Only for you, baby, only for you.”

~~~

Charles gathered the adults in the mansion together at noon. He and Logan informed everyone what had happened, and with the help of Jean and Charles’ powers, everyone was shown a glimpse of it. You stood by Logan the entire time, holding his hand in support.

“So, what about you, Y/N?” Scott asked. “Where are your thoughts on all of this?”

“Logan is still my husband,” you responded. Logan gave your had a reassuring squeeze as you spoke. His eyes were completely focused on you, like he was in a loving trance. “I knew that this would eventually happen since 1973. It was a risk I was willing to take knowing that that future Logan I met loved me so much.”

“But your memories aren't the same,” Bobby commented.

“You’d be surprised how many memories are exactly the same,” Jean responded with a knowing smirk.

“And the two of you are still going to insist on this husband and wife thing, though you've never actually married each other?” Rogue questioned.

“Actually," Logan drawled as he dropped your hand, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you against his side, “we want to make it official.”

“Yeah," you agreed with a bright smile, "and we want to make sure everyone's a part of it.”

“If it’s alright, Professor, we'd like to use the gardens for the wedding.”

“Of course," Charles smiled. “And my finances are at your disposal as well.”

“Yay!” Ororo exclaimed. “We’re going to have a wedding!”

Logan looked down at you, smiling widely. “We're going to have a wedding," he whispered. He leaned in and kissed you softly. You sighed as you leaned into him further.

“I love you," you whispered once you broke the kiss.

“I can promise that I love you more, sweetheart.”

Chapter Text

You often woke up to Logan staring at you, which you didn't mind. You knew that he had gone through a lot of traumatic experiences in his original timeline. You were just grateful that he was here and that the two of you still had so many shared memories. Though, you had yet to tell him that the memories that you didn't share with him, many you knew about. For years, you have had dreams and nightmares about you and Logan. But you knew it wasn't you and your original Logan; you knew it was you and the Logan you had met in 1973. It gave you hope that one day, everything would be made right and that Logan would be able to see that all his efforts were worth it.

Throughout the years, Hank, Charles, and you talked about the Logan you interacted with in 1973. When Logan resurfaced in 2001, the three of you had decided not to mention anything until Logan was stable with his own memories. It wasn't until just before the two of you ran off to Canada that you came clean about what had happened. At first, Logan struggled with the idea that he could be replaced but then he came to realize it was still him, and he still loved you. As long as he was loving you, that was all that mattered to him.

Logan felt like it was a miracle to wake up every morning with you in his arms. You were always asleep before him and awake after him, mainly because Logan was scared that he would close his eyes and find that this was all a dream. He didn’t want to miss a second more of being apart from you.

“Morning," you rasped as you began to wake. As usual, Logan was already up and staring at you, his hands gently holding you to ground him.

“Morning, sweetheart,” he replied. He leaned over and kissed your cheek. “Sleep well?"

“Mhm. You?”

“With you by my side, always."

You couldn’t help but laugh. "Well, we both know that’s not true. We’ve both had our fair share of nightmares while sharing the bed. What I really want to know,” you quickly moved to straddle him, “is if you have been sleeping at all. You... woke up or came back or whatever almost two weeks ago. I know that you are still awake when I fall asleep, and you're always staring at me when I wake.”

“Staring at you? I don’t think I'd call it that, sweetheart.”

“Then what would you call it?”

"Completely in awe. Entranced. Mesmerized. Drawn to—“

You put your hand over his mouth with a laugh. "Okay, okay. I get it. But you didn't answer my concern. Have you been sleeping?”

One of Logan's hands moved to your hip while the other grabbed the wrist of your hand on his mouth. He kissed the palm of your hand before pushing his fingers through yours. “Yes, sweetheart, I've been sleeping.”

“Enough?”

Your concern warmed his heart. “Yes.”

“Any nightmares?”

“Nope.”

“Are you lying to me?”

Logan chuckled, his hands moving around to your back and pulling you down. “I’m smart enough not to lie to my wife.”

“Good.” You kissed him. “We should start wedding planning. Or at least plan a date.”

“Whenever you want.”

“So I can make all the decisions?”

“As long as you walk down the aisle to me, then that’s all that matters.”

Your heart fluttered as you looked down at Logan. You knew he had his flaws, but he was perfect in your eyes and loved you perfectly. You leaned down and kissed him. Logan's hands held you firmly against him, wanting this moment to last as long as possible. It was moments like this— the simple ones— that made everything he’d gone through in his long life worth it.

You eventually broke the kiss. “We’re getting married next week. I can’t wait any longer.”

“Like I said, darling, whenever you want. I'll be there.”

~~~

“A week?” Ororo questioned after you sat her and Jean down to discuss the wedding. "That's not much time."

"I know,” you responded. “But I can't wait any longer. I know that we already call each other husband and wife, but there's something different about making it official.”

“We can make it work,” Jean said with a smile, “as long as you are okay with everyone using their powers to make it happen.”

“Do whatever you need to.”

“And we get to take charge,” Ororo added.

“But it's my wedding.”

"We know. That's why we want it to be perfect and for you to not have to worry about anything.”

Jean reached over and rested her head on yours. “Let us do this for you. You’ve taken care of us since we both got here. It's our turn to take care of you."

You gave the two women a smile and a nod. “Alright. The two of you can handle the wedding, but I still get to choose the dress.”

~~~

“Hank, I have a question for you.”

He stopped what he was working on in the lab and looked up at you. “Ask away.”

“I don’t have any living family, and you have been there for me since I got here. So I was wondering if you’d walk me down the aisle?”

Hank took his glasses off as he stared at you. “You want me to walk you down the aisle?” You nodded. He got up and walked over, wrapping you up in a hug. “I’d be honored.”

~~~

“Professor,” Logan greeted, stepping into the man’s office.

“Logan,” Charles replied with a smile. “Are you settling in alright?”

“I am.”

“I hear that Jean and Ororo have taken over a majority of the wedding planning."

“Y/N doesn't mind. If she’s not worried, I’m not worried.”

“Smart man. What can I help you with?"

“Y/N and I were wondering if you could perform the marriage ceremony.”

Charles smiled. “Of course. Anything for you two.”

“Thanks. And, uh, thanks for everything else.”

“You two have been through enough. You deserve the wedding you want."

“She deserves it. Whatever she wants, she gets.”

“You are a good man, Logan.”

His lip pulled up in a small smile. “Thanks, Professor.”

~~~

The mansion was buzzing with wedding excitement. Everyone was doing what they could to make sure that everything would be perfect for your and Logan’s big day. The only thing that you and Logan had to worry about was your wedding dress and his suit. The two of you had got out to get those the same day, but not together. Hank went with Logan, while Rogue went with you.

Eventually, the night before the wedding came. You were out in the garden, where everything was already set up for the next day. Chairs were neatly aligned, flowers perfectly placed, and a decorative arch stood at the end of the aisle. You walked past the chairs, your fingers grazing them as you walked up to the archway. Taking a deep breath, you allowed your nerves to come forth. You don’t know why you were nervous. The two of you already considered each other husband and wife. Maybe it was just the fact that most brides got nervous the night before their wedding.

As you stood there, you failed to notice Logan leaning against the stone wall on the backside of the archway. His arms were crossed over his chest, a small smile on his lips. Still, after all these years, you were the most beautiful woman in the entire world. Logan was so lucky to be marrying you—officially this time. He watched with loving eyes as you stood under the archway. He could read you like a book and could tell that you were nervous. He could see the small flames forming at your fingertips, telling him it was time to step in.

“You thinkin' about burning the place down?" He teased, making his presence known.

You jumped, turning to face Logan. “What?”

He pushed himself up from the wall and walked over to you. "Your fingers.”

You looked down to see the small flames. Before you could extinguish them, Logan had a hold of your wrists and held your hands up. Your breath caught at the way Logan was looking at the flames. It was pure love and admiration, no fear. You extinguished the flames, and Logan lowered your arms, though still kept a hold of your wrists.

“You out here having second thoughts?" Logan teased.

“Never," you shook your head. "I was just thinking how beautiful it all is. Our friends did a good job.”

“They did.” Logan’s hands moved from your wrists until his fingers were interlaced with yours.

“What are you doing out here?”

“Hadn’t seen you since dinner. Missed you."

You laughed at his neediness. “It’s been ten minutes.”

"Ten minutes too long, sweetheart.”

You sighed, leaning into his chest. Logan let go of your hands so he could wrap you up in his arms. The two of you stayed like that for who knows how long, just you and him under the archway as the sunset. Peace and calm wafted over the two of you, and for the first time in a long while, the two of you let yourselves fully relax.

“Okay! Time to separate!” Jean said, coming down the aisle.

You laughed as Logan held you tighter and turned you away from Jean.

“It's a stupid tradition, Jean,” Logan grumbled. “We're already married.”

“I don't care about your opinion, Logan,” she retorted. “Y/N is sleeping in her room, and you are sleeping in yours. Then the two of you can sleep together for the rest of your long lives. Let her go, Logan.”

“Do I have any say in this?” You questioned, only to go ignored.

“Try me, Jean,” he challenged. “I’m not letting her go."

“Fine,” Jean said, “we’ll do it the hard way.”

Swiftly, Jean entered Logan's mind and forced him to let you go. He groaned, trying to fight it, but you were eventually unwrapped from his arms.

“Come on, Jean!” Logan grunted, still trying to find the mind control. “Y/N, baby, get her to stop.”

“Sorry, honey," you replied, "but this is actually something I requested. It builds suspense for tomorrow.” You leaned in and kissed him. “It’s only one night.”

“One very long night.”

You patted his chest. "You'll be fine. I'll just be next door."

“And don't think about sneaking around!” Jean said. “I have eyes everywhere tonight.”

You laughed while Logan grunted in disapproval. “I need to go.” You kissed him again. “I love you, Logan.”

“Love you, too."

You walked away. "I'll see you in the morning.”

"Yeah, see ya.”

You shook your head at his disappointment as you walked inside. Logan watched you disappear inside before he glared at Jean. She let her grip on him go.

“No funny business tonight, Logan," Jean warned, "or tomorrow until the ceremony. The two of you cannot afford any bad luck.”

"There are too many superstitions surrounding weddings,” Logan muttered.

“And we are choosing to believe in all of them. Now, go to sleep. You need your rest as well.”

~~~

You stood in front of the large mirror, looking at yourself. You were all dolled up, ready for the ceremony. The other women had left you alone so that they could take their seats and you could have a moment to breathe. When a knock sounded at the door, your head tilted in curiosity.

“Who is it?" you asked as you carefully made your way over to the door.

“It's me,” Logan’s gruff voice sounded through the thick wooden door. “Can I come in?”

“Not a chance!” You rushed over and leaned against the door, though you knew that you couldn't actually prevent Logan from coming in if he wanted to.

"But princess—“

“I swear, Logan, if you try to come in here, I’ll burn you to a crisp.”

His chuckle pulled a smile across your lips. "Alright, darling, I won’t come in… I miss you."

“You’ll see me in a few minutes.” You could hear him lean against the door, doing what he could to get close to you.

“Yeah, well, I couldn’t wait. I never want to sleep apart again.”

Your heart dropped. "Did you have a nightmare?” You hated it when you weren't there to comfort him.

“No, just uneasy without you.”

“I’m sorry."

“Hey, I didn't mean to get you down, sweetheart. It’s a happy day. The greatest day. I just miss you.”

“Logan, what are you doing?” Hank was clearly unimpressed, his tone letting you know the look of disappointment that Logan was receiving. “Get out there! It's time!”

You laughed. “I’ll see you in a minute, Logan.”

“I’ll be waiting," he replied.

You listened as Logan walked away and Hank wanted up.

“The coast is clear,” Hank told you. Peeling yourself from the door, you finally opened it. “Wow, Y/N, my dear, you look absolutely amazing.”

“Thank you, Hank,” you smiled.

“Are you ready?”

“I’ve been ready for fifty years.”

Hank held out his arm, and you slipped your arm through his. You let Hank guide you through the halls and out to the garden. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as you watched everyone stand up and look at you. As soon as you were at the beginning of the aisle, your eyes locked on Logan. He was standing under the archway in a sleek black suit with a bow tie. His hands were clasped in front of him while his eyes were focused on you.

The world around the two of you blurred as you became each other's sole focus while Hank guided you down the aisle. Logan swore his heart stopped at the sight of you. A smile adorned his face as tears threatened to well up in his eyes. As soon as Hank had you down the aisle, you kissed his cheek at let Logan take your hands.

“Hey, handsome," you whispered.

“You look... amazing,” Logan breathed out softly.

The two of you were barely listening to Charles, too focused on each other. You both almost missed your signs for the vows. Logan went first.

“I have been wracking my mind on what to say today,” he began. “I wanted to say something different than the first time, but I realized those vows are still true and will always be… I promise to be your partner in all things. I promise to protect you with my life. I promise to be by your side. I promise to love you with a fierceness that rivals me on the battlefield. I promise to embrace every moment with you, cherish our shared experiences, and find joy together. I promise to be your Logan, your James, your Wolverine until the end of my days. But I promise that the title I will wear the post proudly is that of your husband.” Logan looked at you, eyes shining with love and tears. “I love you so much, sweetheart.”

Then, it was your turn.

“Logan… I didn't know what living truly meant until I met you,” you started. “You changed my life the day we met and continue to do so. So today, I promise to continue to be your partner and biggest supporter. I promise to stick by your side through every heartache, battlefield, and moment of joy. I promise to always remind you that you are more than enough and how much I love you. James, you are my hero, my best friend, my husband. I love you.”

Logan quickly tugged you closer. He paused before he could kiss you, his lips hovering over yours.

“Wrap it up, Charles,” he mumbled.

The wedding guests laughed.

“Alright, alright," Charles chuckled. “With the authority given to by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride, Logan.”

Logan didn't wait another second before his lips crashed into yours. The crowd cheered. The two of you smiled as you furthered the kiss, and Logan dipped you. You were still dipped when Logan pulled back and rested his forehead against yours.

“I love you, my beautiful wife.”

“I love you more, my perfect husband.”

Chapter Text

Charles made sure that you and Logan went on a great honeymoon, not that either of you needed anything but a room and a bed. The two of you were gone for three weeks before you came back to the mansion and back to your regular routine.

Logan thought it would be easy to get in the groove of ‘normal’ life after the wedding, but he found it hard without you. You were used to this life—this timeline. Logan couldn’t even teach his history class correctly because he didn’t know all the history of this timeline. Charles and Scott had taken over his class after he ended up not being able to teach the cold war correctly. He was beginning to feel useless, especially when you were busy teaching.

You could see it all begin to weigh on him. Logan had lost his memories before, but this was different. It hurt you to see Logan struggling with all this while trying to be strong for you.

“Honey?” You called to Logan, finding him in your shared room with a cigar between his lips.

He turned around and plastered a small smile on his face. “There’s my beautiful wife.” He took the needs steps toward you and pulled you into his arms. “How was your day?”

“I was good. Yours?”

“Fine.”

You sighed. “Logan… I need you to be honest with me… I know you’re struggling with being here and having different memories.”

“Not strugglin’, princess. I’m fine.”

You pulled back. “Don’t lie to me. I can see right through you.”

Logan sighed. “It’s not you… It’s me… I can’t do anything right. I keep messing up and everyone keeps looking at me like I’m broken. I don’t understand the inside jokes. And I… I’ve even noticed you looking at me differently… Like I’m fragile.”

“Logan—“

He shook his head. “I don’t know how to fix this. I got you back. I married you. We have similar memories. I thought that this would all work. That it would all click eventually.”

“It’s barely been two months, Logan. You can’t expect to feel normal after everything you’ve been through in a short amount of time.”

“What if I always feel this way? What if… we got married too quick and you begin to realize—“

“Now you stop right there, James.” You stepped closer to him and took his face in your hands. “I have loved every version of you, like you have loved every version of me. You cannot let your doubts win. That is what will cause the problems.”

“Sweetheart…”

“James.” You ran your thumbs over his facial hair. “I love you… No matter what you remember. Always have. Always will.”

Logan’s hands came to your waist and tugged you closer. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Yeah, well, sometimes I feel the same way about you.”

~~~

Despite talking to you, Logan still struggled with it all. It didn’t take long before he found his way to Charles’ office. It was deja vu from time long past.

“Professor, I need your help,” Logan stated.

Charles sighed. “You know that playing with the mind can be messy, Logan,” he responded.

“I don’t care. I need everyone to stop looking at me like I’m broken. I’m me.”

“Yes, you are. I cannot promise that going through your mind will make the connect from your timeline and this one. Not by itself anyway. I would need Jean’s help and Y/N’s.”

“Y/N’s?”

“Your wife has to most memories with you. It will help put the pieces together, if possible.”

“I was hoping—“

“I know that you were hoping to keep Y/N out of it, but that is just not possible.”

Logan sighed. “I just don’t want this to disappoint her… She’s fine the way I am, with the memories I have. If she knows that I am still feeling this way…”

“Y/N will never walk away from you. Trust me, you have had your moments where we all questioned if she would. But that woman loves you too much and has loved you too long. Talk to your wife. Come to me with what the two of you have decided together.”

~~~

You were in your classroom grading late into the night. You hadn’t seen Logan yet, which was a bit unusual but you ignored it. When Logan finally made an appearance in your classroom, he was standing nervously at the door. You looked up at him, worried that something was wrong.

“Logan?” You stood up and walked around your desk. “What’s wrong?”

“I… I need to ask something of you,” he muttered, not making eye contact.

“What is it?”

“I know that you said that it doesn’t matter what I remember, but it matters to me… I love you fully and completely, but there’s parts missing for the both of us. Sweetheart…” He reached out and took your hands in his. “Charles send that he could try and piece together my memories from this timeline, but I would need your help in doing so.” Finally, Logan made eye contact with you. You had rarely seen him so desperate towards you. “I know you love me the way I am… But I want to be more for you… I want to be everything.”

“James, you are my everything. I don’t need to share memories with you for that to be the case.”

“I know… I just… I need this…. Honey… I’m lost.”

“Then I’ll do whatever I need to do to make sure you’re found again.”

~~~

Logan and you were laying beside each other in the med-bay, holding hands. Charles was sitting at Logan’s head, while Jean was at yours.

“This will be painful, for the both of you,” Charles warned. “Are you sure you both want to do this?”

Logan looked over at you, worried that you were going to back out though he knew that you’d do anything for him. You gave his hand a squeeze.

“We want to do this,” you responded.

Logan squeezed your hand back. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you more.”

“Okay,” Charles interrupted. “Let’s begin.”

Charles placed his hands on Logan’s head while Jean placed her hands on yours. You kept your eyes on Logan until you felt the intrusion in your mind. You squeezed your eyes shut at the pain. You bit back the shout for as long as you could, but eventually you had to let it out. As you shouted, flames surged from your body.

“Keep her calm,” Charles instructed.

“I’m trying,” Jean grunted as she pushed through your mind.

Logan gripped your hand tighter, despite your skin heating up quickly. He gritted his teeth as he tried not to regret putting you in this situation. Suddenly, memories came flooding into his mind, causing him to gasp.

“It’s working,” Logan mumbled.

But what Logan didn’t know yet is that it was working both ways. You were gaining the memories from the dead timeline. And those memories were much more traumatic than the ones from this timeline. You cried out again as you felt the Sentinel pierce your torso.

“Oh my gosh,” Jean muttered, realizing what was happening. “The memories are going both ways.” You screamed, setting fires off around the room. “We need to stop! She’s remember Logan’s timeline! It’s too much for her!”

“We can’t break the connection right now!” Charles responded. “It’s almost done. She can hold on.”

The next few minutes felt like agonizing hours for you and for Logan. He knew that you were in pain and struggling, and it was all his fault. You screamed again, burning his hand.

“Enough!” Logan demanded. “Enough!”

“We’re done,” Charles pulled away, as did Jean.

Logan shot up, ignoring that he now hand two timelines of memories in his head, and leaned over you. You were whimpering and burning up. Your eyes remained closed though tears slipped through them.

“Sweetheart… honey,” Logan called, pulling you up into his lap. “Please, say something. Talk to me.” Your breathing became labored pants; your heart pounding in your chest. Logan looked to Charles and Jean, eyes full of unshed tears. “Do something! Please!” He couldn’t lose you again and it was even worse now, having both timelines to draw from.

“Her mind has to figure out the two timelines all on its own,” Charles said.

“If I would have known… I wouldn’t have done it… She didn’t need the dead timeline, I just needed this one…”

You were gasping, chest heaving like you were struggling to get any air into your lungs. Then, before anyone could do anything, your heart stopped.

“No!” Logan screamed. “Sweetheart, Y/N, please, come back! I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He pulled you closer and rested his head against yours. “It’s all my fault… It’s all my fault…”

Jean could see heat radiating off of you and knew that there was a potential for you to go up in flames. She grabbed Logan’s arms from behind and began tugging him away.

“You need to let her go, Logan,” Jean said. “She’s going to go up in flames.”

“No!” He fought. “This is all my fault! I should have just left everything as it was.”

“She’ll come back. You just need to let her go.”

Reluctantly, Logan let Jean pull him away from you. You were left on the table and as soon as Logan was a safe distance, you went up in flames. When the fire died down, all that was left behind was a pile of ash. Charles and Jean took their leave while Logan pulled up a chair beside your ashes. There was no telling how long it would be until you returned, if at all.

~~~

When you finally gasped for air and sat up, it had been only a few hours. Though they were some of the most agonizing hours of Logan long, confusing life. Logan stood up quickly and pulled you into him.

“I’m so sorry!” He cried. “I didn’t mean for it to backfire like this. I shouldn’t have pushed you into something.”

“Logan, shh,” you wrapped your arms around him. “I’m here… I’m okay… And I remember it all… Both timelines.”

“Me too.”

You pulled back and held his face in your hands. “James… I remember all of it… You’re not alone… I love you so much.”

He shook his head. “Not as much as I love you.”

~~~

Logan and you clung to each other like the newlyweds you still were. Though now, you had both of your shared experiences. It got confusing at times, the two timelines in your heads, but Charles helped organize your minds so that you both could better handle it. It didn’t stop some of the memories coming up as nightmares. For Logan, he was fine as long as he had you by his side. You, on the other hand, were dealing with he fact that the memories from the dead timeline were more traumatic than the current timeline.

Tonight, you were reliving when Victor faked your death. Logan was sleeping soundly with you tucked in close to him, while you were fighting for your life inside your mind. You began to groan and whimper as your body began to heat up.

“Honey?” Logan mumbled, beginning to come to as he heard and felt you. “Sweetheart?”

You let out a blood curdling scream, causing Logan to quickly jump into action. He immediately scanned you to make sure that you weren’t actually injured before straddling you and holding your wrists above your head.

“What’s going on?” Jean fretted as she rushed in with Scott.

“Nightmare,” Logan muttered, focusing on you. “Go back to bed.” The couple slowly left, not that Logan noticed. “Wake up, honey. It’s not real. I’m right here… Wake up.”

When you final woke, tears were sizzling down your cheeks. Your eyes were frantic, unable to focus. Logan let go of your wrists and gently cradled your face.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he mumbled. You sobbed. He pulled you into his arms and laid down with you on top of him. “I’m right here… I’ve got you…”

“It was awful,” you cried. “They killed me to hurt you and—“

“Wait, wait, wait,” he pulled away to look at your face. “What are you talking about?”

“It wasn’t a nightmare… It was a memory.”

Logan’s heart dropped. He knew the memory you were talking about. He had held your cold body and cried when Victor and Stryker had faked your death. You didn’t have any recollection of the memory until Logan had asked you to help him reconcile the timelines. It was all his fault.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he whispered, cradling you close. “Tell me how to fix this.”

“Hold me,” you whimpered. “Remind me that I’m still alive… That we’re okay.”

Logan kissed your temple. “I love you.” Then he kissed your cheek. “I’ve got you.” He kissed the tip of your nose. “You’re alive.” Then he kissed your lips, slowly and tenderly. “We’re okay.”

~~~

As time went on, you and Logan got used to the two timelines in your head and you were honestly thankful to have both sets of memories. Having both sets of memories meant having more good memories with Logan. And, as impossible as it sounds, only made your love for Logan increase.

Logan was in the bathroom, cleaning up his facial hair. All he had was a pair of sweats on, hanging low on his hips. You were leaning against the doorway, shamelessly ogling him. Logan caught your eye movements in the mirror and smirked.

“Enjoying the show?” He teased.

“Always,” you responded.

You pushed yourself off and walked over to Logan. You slid your arms around Logan as you pressed kisses to his bare back.

“You’re so handsome,” you mumbled. “How did I get so lucky to have a handsome hunk like you for a husband?”

Logan rolled his eyes as he continued working. “You’re ridiculous, princess.”

“Yet, you still married me… Do you remember when you proposed to me?”

“Which time?”

“The first… You were being so secretive. I was so worried that you were going to leave me.”

He took one of your hands and pressed a kiss to the back of it. “I would never leave you, sweetheart. I was just so nervous. I was scared that you’d say ‘no’.”

“Impossible. I love you too much.”

Logan smiled, a genuine smile, as he turned around to face you. “I love you more.” He kissed you, getting shaving cream on you from where it was on his chin.

You pushed him away, laughing. “Logan! You got shaving cream on me!”

“I don’t care.” He grabbed your waist and pulled you closer. “I’m gonna kiss my wife, no matter how messy I make you.”

“That was—“

He shut you up with a brief kiss. “I know how that sounds and I don’t care.” He began kissing down your neck.

“Logan,” you moaned. “You— You should finish shaving.”

“Later. I’ve got to remind my wife that I love her more.”

Chapter Text

“She’s beautiful, Jean,” you smiled down at the baby in your arms.

“Rachel’s wonderful, but she’s a terrible sleeper,” Jean commented.

“Oh, I know,” Logan murmured from where he was sitting in the chair. “I hear every sound she makes.”

“I told you that I could buy you headphones,” you told Logan.

“Then how would I be able to hear you, sweetheart?”

You rolled your eyes, going back to focusing on the baby in your arms. As she cooed and looked around, you began thinking about what it would be like to have your owe child. You and Logan had barely had any conversations about children of your own, mostly ignoring the topic completely. You glanced at Logan, who had his arms crossed and eyes closed now, clearly asleep. Would Logan want a child? You were content with your life as it was, but having a child would bring a different contentment.

~~~

You were dazed, stuck in your head, that much was clear to Logan. You were getting ready for bed like a robot, simply going through the routine. Logan was leaning back against the wall, studying your movements. Before you could crawl into bed, Logan pulled you back into him and buried his head in the crook of your neck. He held a kiss on your skin.

“What’s on your mind, princess?” He mumbled against your skin.

You leaned back into him, closing your eyes for a moment to enjoy the comfort that only your husband could provide. Logan held you tighter, sensing that you needed to just be held for a moment. He couldn’t help but worry more the longer that you were silent.

“James,” you whispered.

Logan tried not to tense as the use of his real first name. “Yeah, sweetheart?”

“I… I have a question for you.”

“You know you can ask me anything.”

You nodded, taking a second to gather your thoughts. “What do you… what do you think about children?”

“Children? Uh, well, I mean, we both teach them so I have to at least put up with them.”

“I don’t know if that really answered my question.” You began to pull away from his hold. “Let’s just go to bed.”

“Hey, no.” He pulled you back and guided you to turn around. “What’s this really about?” You shook your head. Before you could say another word, Logan hand your chin in his hand and was forcing you to look at him. “Talk to me, sweetheart.”

“I need you to be open minded and serious.”

“Okay.”

“Have you ever thought about having kids?”

Logan froze. He tried to gauge the answer you wanted, but you were clearly wanting him to answer you honestly. “A few times, in our long lives, yes I have.”

“And?”

Logan sighed. “Princess, I think that you would make an amazing mother. I just don’t trust myself completely as father material.”

“Logan—“

“But… I will give anything a shot as long as you’re by my side.” His hands moved to tenderly hold your face. “If you want a kid— if you want to try for one, I’m all in.”

“Really?”

“Honey, my only job in life is to make you happy.”

“I don’t want to force anything on you.”

“You’re not forcing anything, sweetheart. I want to do this not just for you but with you. Besides,” a smirk grew on his face, “I think it could be really fun trying for a kid.”

You laughed. “Of course that’s where your mind goes!”

“Hey, you can’t fault me for enjoying sex with my wife.”

“I guess you’re right.”

~~~

You and Logan did have fun trying to get pregnant, even if many of the other X-Men found it annoying. It was ten months into trying when Logan slowly began to notice a shift with you.

First, you were waking up sick. The sickness was sporadic, so neither of you assumed pregnancy. The next thing Logan noticed was how tired you became. You were napping between teaching classes, before dinner, and after every training session. You had naps occasionally before this, but this was a completely different beast.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Logan questioned after you told him that you were going to take a nap. His hand came up to your forehead, searching for a fever.

You giggled. “What are you doing?”

“Just checkin’. There’s somethin’ different. Something’s… off. Maybe we should have Hank or Jean take a look at you.”

“I’m feeling fine, honey.

“Sweetheart—“

“It’s just a nap.” You grabbed his hand and tugged him closer. “Why don’t you join me? I always sleep better with you by my side.”

Logan huffed, worried about you. “Fine. Let’s go.”

Logan led you to your room and laid down on the bed. You cuddled into him and quickly fell asleep. Logan’s ears tuned into your beating heart, but there was something else there. Almost like… a smaller heartbeat accompanying yours. With furrowed brows, Logan carefully moved himself down the bed and laid his head on your stomach, ear against it. His eyes widened as the other heartbeat grew louder. He stayed still, listening to your heartbeat and the smaller one inside of you.

“Sweetheart,” Logan gently woke you, moving to hover above you. “Y/N, wake up.”

“Huh?” You mumbled. “Logan? What’s going on?”

“Princess, I need you to take a pregnancy test.”

Now you were awake. “What?” You sat up.

“Just trust me on this.”

~~~

Logan held you as the timer ticked away. The two of you were facing away from where the pregnancy test sat on the counter. Logan’s ears were focused on your nervous heartbeat and the one lying just underneath it. He knew that you were pregnant, it was the only explanation. But Logan also knew that you needed the test to know for sure. When the timer went off, you tensed in his hold.

“What if—“

“It’s going to be good,” Logan cut you off. “Trust me.”

You looked at him, curiously. “How do you know?”

Logan sighed. “While you were sleeping, I could hear a second heartbeat.”

“What?”

“And, yes, I may just be hearing things but, honey, you’re acting strange and it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

You nodded. “Okay… Let’s look.”

Still holding onto you, Logan turned you both around. The two of you looked down and the test with baited breath. As clear as day, the test said that you were pregnant.

“Oh my gosh,” you breathed out.

Logan pulled you back into him. One of his hands slowly moved down to carefully rest on your lower stomach. There was a baby inside of you. He had two of you to protect now.

“I’m pregnant,” you whispered.

“You’re pregnant, sweetheart,” repeated Logan.

“I’m pregnant!” You turned and jumped onto Logan. He chuckled as he held you close. “We’re going to have a baby!”

“We’re going to have a baby.”

~~~

It became Logan’s mission to be over prepared for your pregnancy, the baby’s birth, and fatherhood. Every moment he could, he had his nose in a book, reading up. Logan would not let himself let you down. He needed to be prepared for any scenario that came your way.

You found it so sweet and incredibly attractive. Especially when you would find him dozed off with his reading glasses barely hanging on his nose. In those moments, you would allow yourself to enjoy the view, sometimes snapping a picture, before pulling his glasses off and placing a blanket on top of him.

Logan was willing to do anything you asked him, whenever you asked him. When you had a weird combination of cravings in the middle of the night, Logan was up and running to the store without a second thought. When your feet began swelling and you were feeling self conscious, Logan massaged them for however long you needed. He was willing to do anything and everything to make sure that you and the baby were safe and comfortable.

One day, Logan finished teaching and headed to your classroom to check on you. Except, your classroom was empty. Usually, you had one more class to teach. He caught Ororo in the hall while he was looking for you elsewhere.

“Storm,” he called, “have you seen Y/N?”

“She cancelled her class,” Ororo explained. “Said she wasn’t feeling good but told me not to worry you.”

“Not feeling good? I need to know every time my wife isn’t feeling good, Storm. Pregnant or not.”

“I’m sure she’s fine, Logan.”

“Sure.” Logan hurried up to your shared room. “Y/N? Sweetheart?”

He found the bathroom door open, where you were standing in front of the mirror. You were standing so that you could see your side, hands running over your belly while your shirt was pulled up. Logan smirked, noting how beautiful your belly was, poking out showing that the baby was growing. Then his eyes moved up to your face, causing his smirk to fall. You tears slipping down your cheeks as you stared at yourself in the mirror.

“Y/N?” Logan stepped closer, concerned. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m getting bigger,” you muttered.

“Uh, yes?”

“Will you still love me even though my body will never look the same?”

Logan’s heart clenched at your words. He hated that your mind was tricking you into doubting him. “Sweetheart…” Logan came around to pull your back into his chest. He placed his hands over yours on your belly and pressed a kiss to your cheek. “No matter how your body changes, you are always beautiful to me. In fact, you are so attractive to me right now. Your body getting bigger means that the baby is growing inside of you. It means that you both are alive and okay. What your body is doing is amazing. So I love it—love you—more for it.”

Now you were shedding happy tears. “You mean all that?”

“Princess, I will never tell you anything I don’t mean. You know that.”

~~~

As Logan read up more on fatherhood and watched Scott with his daughter, Rachel, Logan thought back to his own father. There was the man who raised him, then there was the man who created him with his mother. Neither of them were that great of men. Hell, Logan wasn’t that great of a man. He was trying as a husband, but found himself slipping up all too often. What if he slipped up too much with this child? What if he hurt them to the point that there was no going back?

You could see that something was bothering Logan. He was tense with a far off look in his eyes. You often found him like that after your work days with a cigar between his lips. Tonight, you were laying in bed watching him go through the motions before joining you.

“Logan? Are you okay?”

He nodded. “Fine.”

“I don’t believe you. Tell me what’s up.”

Logan sighed. He turned to the side and rested his hand on your belly. “What if I’m a terrible father?”

“Did someone say something? What is Scott? I will light up his ass so fast. I—“

He chuckled, pressing you back against your pillows with a loving hand before you could go after Scott. “Summers didn’t say anythin’. Just my thoughts.”

“Well, your thoughts are awful and deserve to be set on fire too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You are going to be the best father. You already are. By taking care of me, you’re taking care of our child. And the way you interact with Rogue is very father-like and I don’t even think you realize it.”

“I guess…”

“I know. Now—“

Both of you froze at the sudden movement in your belly. With baited breath, you both waited for something else to happen. You gasped when the baby kicked again.

“Their kicking,” you breathed out.

“That’s amazing,” Logan said in awe as he stared at your belly, where his hand was still resting.

“I guess they don’t like their father talking bad about himself either.”

Logan moved so his head was lightly resting on your belly. “I’m sorry, kiddo. I’ll try to be better for you. I promise.” He pressed a kiss to your belly. “I love you and your momma so much.”

The baby kicked again and the two of you laughed. “I think they love you too.”

~~~

As your belly grew, the added weight became a light nagging in the back of your mind. It wasn’t terrible, you were getting used to it, but it was still a lot. Logan caught you in your classroom between classes.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted before pressing a light kiss to your lips. “How are we doing today?”

“Fine,” you huffed. “My belly’s just bugging.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, just the weight of it all. I just wish I had a little break from it.”

“Can I try something I saw a video of?”

“Sure.”

Logan came around you and placed his hands under your belly. He lifted it, taking on the weight with ease. You sighed in relief as you leaned back into him.

“Oh my gosh,” you breathed out. “That feels amazing.”

He pressed a kiss to your head. “Good. We can do this a few times a day then.”

“Okay,” you nodded. “Thank you.”

“Anything for my amazing wife.”

~~~

Logan had never loved his heightened senses until he was able to tell that you were pregnant. He loved hearing the baby and you, together. The rhythmic beating of your hearts as one. It gave him a sense of peace and happiness. That is, until his heightened senses did him dirty.

It had been a hard night. You were at thirty-seven weeks now and struggling to find a comfortable sleeping position. But eventually Logan got you comfortable enough to fall asleep. Once you were asleep, Logan followed after you.

When he woke, Logan’s ears strained to hear the comforting sound of your heartbeat and the baby’s. Except he could only pick up one. Trying not to wake you, or worry you if there was no need, Logan moved to place his head against your large belly. He held his breath as he listened for a faint heartbeat, movement, anything.

Without wasting another second, Logan scooped you into his arms and was rushing down the hall.

“Jean! Hank!” He shouted, no caring who he woke.

“Logan?” You questioned, waking up. “What’s going on?”

“Jean! Hank! Anyone!”

“It’s like four in the morning, Howlett,” Scott complained as he peeked his head out of his room. “We just got Rachel down so can you—“

Then Jean pushed her way out of the room and rushed over to where Logan was holding you. “We need to get her to the med-bay,” she stated. “Now.”

“Wh—What’s happening?” Your voice trembled as your heart started to race.

You were seriously terrified now. You looked at Logan for comfort, tears forming in your eyes when all you saw was Logan’s terrified eyes looking back at you. Logan rushed you down to the med-bay with Jean, Hank quickly getting there. Jean quickly set up the ultrasound machine, whispering to Hank on the other side of the room.

“Logan? I’m scared,” you admitted, squeezing the hand he was holding. “What is going on?”

“I… Sweetheart…”

Logan didn’t know how to tell you that he couldn’t hear your baby anymore. He was praying to a God he didn’t believe in that he was wrong. That his senses were failing him. Jean and Hank rolled the ultrasound machine over and prepped you for one. The tension in the air grew thick as everyone kept silent. Jean maneuvered the ultrasound machine against your belly, staring intently at the screen. But you knew something was up.

“Why can’t I hear a heartbeat?” You asked. “Do you have the sound on?”

Logan gripped your hand tighter. “Princess…”

“What’s going on? Where’s the heartbeat?”

Jean and Hank shared a look. You could tell that they were having a mental conversation. Then Hank left the room, completely confusing you.

“Y/N,” Jean’s tone was clear and quiet. “There’s no heartbeat.”

“No,” you shook your head. “No. Check again! Your sound must be off!”

“It isn’t, sweetheart,” Logan answered. “I… I don’t hear a heartbeat.”

“No!” You cried. “No! It was just there! I just… I just had a check up!”

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Jean said.

Sobs wracked your body as your hands cradled your belly. Your child was just moving hours ago. They were alive and well. Now… now your belly was a tomb. Tears pricked Logan’s eyes as he climbed onto the bed and held you close.

“No! No!” You sobbed. “No!”

“I’ll let you two have a moment,” Jean said before taking her leave.

~~~

Not to anyone’s surprise. It took you a long while for your sobs to turn into whimpers. Logan kept a strong hold on you, like it would keep you from falling apart. Though, he was sure that if he let go, he would fall apart too. The only thing keeping him from completely losing it was the sound of your heartbeat. If your heart kept beating, Logan would be alright. He would be able to handle the storm of grief barreling towards you both. He would be able to be your anchor.

When Jean came back in, Charles and Hank came with her. The came around the bed. Charles placed a gentle hand on your leg.

“I’m so sorry,” he said. The news was clearly taking a toll on him as well.

“We need to talk next steps,” Jean stated.

“No…” you whimpered. “I can’t.”

“Unfortunately, we have to, Y/N,” Hank responded. “We need to act fast before the baby causes any health risks to you.”

Logan’s heart dropped. He couldn’t lose you too. “I’m listening,” he said, continuing to rock you in his arms.

Jean sighed. “Y/N needs to deliver the baby. We will administer medicine to start labor and she will have to give birth to the baby.” You began sobbing again. “Once she has the baby, you both will be able to hold it, name it, and say your goodbyes.”

“There has to be another way.” He was begging for another way. Something that wouldn’t cause you anymore pain. Something that would allow him to do more than just hold you.

Hank shook his head, taking his turn in the bad news. “There’s only vaginal birth or a c-section. We are not sure a c-section is the best idea with Y/N’s healing ability. She could heal faster than we can get the baby out and it would leave a large scar.”

Logan nodded. He absolutely despised that any way to fix this caused you pain. Because, well really, there was no fixing this. Your baby was gone and yet still inside of you. He looked down at you and knew that you were in no position to make a decision, but the decision had to be made.

“Okay,” Logan whispered, eyes still focused on you. “Whatever you think is best.”

“I’ll administer the medication while Hank sets up the other room for delivery,” Jean said.

“This is a nightmare,” you whimpered against your husband.

“I know… I know…” He wished it was a nightmare, something that the two of you could wake up from. But it wasn’t. And he didn’t know how to help you with any of this.

Jean came over with a syringe. Logan held you tighter as she injected you with the needed medication. “Labor should start soon,” she explained. “There’s a gown you can help her get into and then meet us in the next room.” Then Jean slipped out.

“Come on, honey,” Logan said softly. “We’ve got to get you changed.”

“How is this happening?” You cried as Logan moved you around and began to take your clothes off.

“I don’t know, sweetheart.”

“Was it me? Did I—“

“Hey! No, no, no, no, no.” Logan cupped your face and forced you to look at him. “This is not your fault.”

“You don’t know that.”

“This is not your fault, princess.”

“Then what happened? We heard the heartbeat a couple of days ago. You heard the heartbeat, right?”

Logan sighed, catching your tears with his thumbs. “I did, honey. Right before I fell asleep. It was strong and it was there.”

“Then why did it stop? What could have possibly happened in just a few hours?”

“I wish I knew, sweetheart. I wish I could go back and change it.”

“You have! Get Kitty and we—“

Logan shook his head. “No, sweetheart. It doesn’t work like that. We can’t risk it.”

“But our baby!”

“I know, honey, and I wish that I could do something. You know that I would do anything to protect you.”

“Why?” You sobbed. “Why does it always have to be us?”

Logan pulled you back into him, holding you as close as he could. “I wish I knew, princess. I wish I knew…”

You clung to Logan as you sobbed. Logan couldn’t prevent his own tears from finally falling. When you gasped and pulled away, hands going to your belly, Logan knew that this pain was just the beginning.

“We need to get you to the other room, honey,” Logan said.

“I don’t want to do this,” you shook your head. “Why do I have to do this? Please don’t make me do this, James. Please.”

Logan bit his tongue as he got you out of your clothes and into one of the medical gowns. Your hands went to your belly as you groaned in pain, tears still cascading down your cheeks. Logan came up behind you and held your belly up. One was once a sweet gesture that Logan loved to do, now felt like it was the only thing keeping you from drowning.

Still in that position, Logan got you into the other room, where Hank, Jean, Ororo, and Charles were waiting. It was all set up for you to have this baby and your X-Men family was going to make sure that you had all the support you needed. Logan guided you to the bed. You leaned against it and crouched down.

“Ah!” You let out a cry of pain, both physical and emotional.

Logan looked to Jean, completely feeling helpless. “Tell me what I can do to make this better,” he begged. “I need to make this better.” Everyone’s hearts broke at the sight of the big, bad Wolverine pleading for his wife and stillborn child.

“Just be with her,” Jean told him, wishing that there was something more any of them could do. “Hold her and tell her anything that will get her through this.”

You were sobbing against the bed, making everyone’s heart break around you. Your powers were finally catching up with your emotions, making your skin hot and beginning to burn the fabric you were touching. Suddenly, Rogue and Bobby appeared in the room.

“I asked them to come help,” Charles explained. “We can’t have Y/N flaming up during this.”

Logan nodded, hating that he was so helpless. Why couldn’t this have been a problem he could have fought to fix? Bobby came over first, hesitant.

“Hey, Y/N,” he greeted, coming to your side. “I’m going to try to cool you down, okay?”

You didn’t register that anyone was talking to you and Logan could tell.

“Do whatever you need to do,” Logan said. “Just help her.”

Bobby nodded before placing his hands on your arms and icing them. “She’s really heating up,” he commented, trying to fight through your powers.

“Rogue,” Charles called. “Take some of her power.”

“But the ba—“ The concern died on Logan’s tongue. The baby was already gone. Now, it was just about saving you and getting you through this birth.

Rogue gave him a look of sorrow before going up to you and touching you. You gasped, going limp. Logan muttered against your hear that he had you while Rogue and Bobby worked together to bring you to a normal temperature. Once they had completed their task, they excused themselves but not before making sure that everyone knew they could be called back.

Logan maneuvered you to lay on the bed, allowing Hank to hook you up to the needed equipment to monitor your condition. Logan helped your legs into the stirrups to allow Jean to check the progress.

“The medicine is working,” Jean stated. “We’re going to have her push in a few minutes.”

“No, no,” you whimpered, shaking your head. “I can’t… I can’t…”

“Sweetheart, look at me,” Logan placed himself in front of you, gripping your hand tightly. Through your blurry eyes, you looked at your husband. “You have to do what Jean says, or it’s going to be bad for you.”

“I don’t care.”

Every word that left your lips was only breaking Logan further. Tears slipped again down his own cheeks. “You have to, princess. You know I can’t lose you, too. I’m going to be here the entire time. Whatever you need.”

“I need my baby to be alive.”

“I know, honey.”

“Logan, move to sit behind Y/N,” Jean ordered. “Keep her up and help her.”

Logan climbed onto the bed behind you, making sure that you were between his legs and that his hands held yours. “Squeeze at tight as you need, honey. Burn them off if you have to,” he whispered against your ear, pressing kisses. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Okay, Y/N. It’s time to push.”

“You got this, sweetheart,” Logan encouraged as you screamed. “You got this.”

Logan would forever be grateful for whatever Hank and Jean gave you, because it moved labor faster than he had ever heard of.

“I don’t want to do this, Logan,” you cried after another two pushes. “I can’t give birth to my baby like this.”

Logan’s thumbs rubbed the back of your hands as he pressed kisses to your head. “You’re almost done, sweetheart. They’re almost here.”

“No… they’re not…”

Logan regretted his words, but before he could fix it, Jean was telling you to push one last time. You screamed, flames bursting up from your hands. Logan pushed down his on groan as your flames burnt his hands and focused on your pain. When the push was through, you laid back against Logan, breathing heavily as you began to cry again. Jean and Hank quickly cut the cord and took the baby over to the side.

“You did so good, sweetheart,” Logan whispered against your neck, trying to make you feel better. “You were so brave.”

“I— I need to know,” you rasped. “The baby…”

Jean turned around with your baby bundled in a blanket in her arms. “He’s gone.”

“He?” You and Logan repeated.

She nodded as she walked over to the two of you. “It’s a boy.” You choked back a sob. “Would you like to hold him?”

Your arms trembled as they reached out to take the baby from Jean. You cradled him close. Logan’s head rested on your shoulder to look down at his son as his arms further wrapped around you to help you hold your child.

“He’s beautiful,” you cried. “He’s so beautiful.”

“Just like his mother,” Logan commented.

“We’ll let you have a moment,” Charles said and the others took their leave.

The two of you sat on the bed in silence, staring at your lifeless son. You didn’t know what to say or what to do. Your lives had changed course so quickly in the matter of a few hours. What were you supposed to do?

“We should name him,” you whispered.

“Yeah,” Logan agreed. “Got any in mind?”

“Jimmy… After his amazing father.”

“Sweetheart, are you sure?”

“James, you are the only thing I’m sure of anymore.”

“I love you, Y/N.

“I love you, too, James.” You leaned down and pressed a kiss to your son’s forehead. “I love you, Jimmy… Forever.”

~~~

You hated your body. You believed that it had killed your child and it clearly couldn’t get the memo that their was no longer a child to take care of. You still had milk to pump out of your breasts. You had to heal from the labor, with no reward for it. Your hormones were all wack and it seemed like your healing ability was put on pause. Your body was not bouncing back like it should have, making everything you were feeling worse.

Logan felt completely helpless. Of course, he was dealing with his own grief over the loss of your son but then there was you. His wife. His whole world. You were breaking under the pressure of it all. You were withdrawing faster than he could catch up. Every time you needed to pump, you would break into a puddle of tears. Logan would have to help you get set up or hold you while you did it. And that’s only if you let him touch you. Almost every time he tried, you would pull away or burn him. Logan could take a lot of your heat, but this was something different.

It was six days after Jimmy’s birth when Logan came upstairs to find you getting out of your shared room with a packed bag.

“Sweetheart? We goin’ somewhere?” Logan questioned.

“I’m going to stay in my own room,” you muttered, not making eye contact with Logan.

“What? No. Honey, please—“ He scrambled closer, trying to take your hands for you only to pull away. “Don’t do this. Sweetheart, please. I’ll do anything. I’ll sleep on the floor, the tub, just don’t move rooms.”

“I don’t know how you bear to look at me… At my body… after everything it’s done.”

“Princess, your body is amazing.”

You shook your head. “My body killed our son.”

Logan didn’t even know what to say. How could he convince you that what happened wasn’t your fault? Quickly, he pulled you into him. You fought against his grip but he only held on tighter.

“Let go of me, Logan!” You demanded. “Let me go!”

“No,” he firmly replied. “I’m not letting you go… Never.”

“Logan, please! Please just… let me go.”

“I went to the past to get you back in my arms. You are crazy if you think I’m letting you go after this.”

“Logan… It’s… It’s too much… Too heavy… I can’t do this…”

“We’re going to do this together, sweetheart. You’re not doing this on your own.”

“It’s too hard.”

“I know, honey, I know.”

“My body hates me… I hate my body…”

He kissed your head. “I love your body.”

“I don’t understand how.”

“Don’t run and hide and I can show you… I will remind you every day how amazing your body is. How amazing you are.”

“You’re struggling too. I don’t want to add on—“

“Stop that. Please stop trying to push me away. Let me struggle with you… Let us struggle together.” Logan felt you finally melt into him more. Swiftly, he scooped you up and carried you back into your shared room. He laid on the bed and the two of you cuddled together. “I love you.” He pressed a kiss to your nose. “Every part of you.”

“I love you,” you rasped. “I hate this…”

“Me, too, sweetheart. I wish I could fix it all.”

You nodded. “I’m sorry… that’s for being patient with me.”

“It’s my job.”

~~~

Logan made sure you were sound asleep before he headed for the far end of the school property and began attacking the trees with his claws. He grunted and cried out with his swipe. Eventually, tears began cascading down his cheeks. Everything was so overwhelming. Why couldn’t he just fix this?

You woke up to an empty bed and you immediately went to find Logan. Charles, who was awake, helped guide you to Logan’s location. You saw the marks on the trees and your heart broke. You found Logan on his knees, sobbing. You fell in front of him and wrapped him up in your arms, breaking down as well. That’s where you two were found in the morning and guided back into the mansion.

As the days and weeks past, days were up and down. Sometimes you both felt like you were going to be okay and then the next moment, you were both struggling to breathe through the grief. The only thing that was getting either of you through any of it was each other. Both of you stepped away from teaching classes, trainings, and missions, to just be able to deal with the grief together as much as you two were able.

Charles insisted that you both see a therapist. Logan didn’t argue once he knew that you were on board. Jean found ways to help your body and kick your healing ability back into gear. Eventually, your body wasn’t a reminder of what should have been. Now it was just the heartbreak and the lake of a baby in your arms.

One night, months later, you and Logan were cuddled up, wide awake.

“Sweetheart, I have a question for you,” Logan whispered, breaking your tender silence.

“Hmm?” You hummed.

“Do you still want a child?” Logan felt you instantly tense. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said—“

“No, no, no, I’m fine. It’s… a needed question… Maybe, someday.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

“Why?”

“I just want to make sure that I know where you’re at.”

“What about you?”

“I feel the same… Someday, maybe. For now, we stick to it being just us. To healing.”

“Maybe we go on more trips?”

“I hate flying, sweetheart.” He gave you a teasing grin.

“We can road trip as much as we can.”

“I like the sound of that. Just me and my beautiful wife on the open road.”

“Like old times.”

He pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Yes, like old times.”

“We’re going to be okay, right?”

“It’s like our therapist says, sweetheart, one day at a time. And as long as I have you by my side, I’ll be okay.”

“I just need you too, Logan. Always have, always will."

Chapter Text

Grief came and went in waves. Especially when it came to the loss of your son. But things were getting better. You and Logan were making sure that the two of you were working through that together.

Now, it had been almost a year since that tragic loss. You were asleep in Logan’s arms. He had already woke up and was just focused on you. Some nights it was harder to go to sleep or stay asleep. Logan had this fear that he would wake up to your heart not beating. He couldn’t go through that again. He knew, despite his healing factor, he would never be able to survive that.

Logan knew that there was a possibility of waking you, but he couldn’t help himself as he began pressing kisses to your face and neck. You began to stir awake.

“Logan?” You rasped.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he mumbled against your skin. “Can’t help myself.”

“Hard night?” He hummed in response, nodding into your neck. “I’m sorry… anything I can do to help?”

“Just let me hold ya.”

“Always.”

~~~

“I want to check in with you, Howlett,” Scott said, catching Logan in the hallway.

“What is there to check in about?” Logan questioned, confused.

“Your wife. Y/N hasn’t been on a mission since the pregnancy. Do you feel like she’s alright to be put back on the roster?”

Logan took in a sharp breath. Personally, he would never let you on a mission again. That had little to nothing to do with the pregnancy, but his overwhelming need to protect you. He thought to how you were doing. Yes, he could still see the pain dwindle in your eyes at times, especially when you saw Jean and Scott with Rachel. But it was getting better. You were getting better. Despite that, everything in him was screaming at him to say no. To tell Scott that you weren’t ready yet. So that’s exactly what he did.

“No,” Logan’s response was firm, with no room for argument. “Y/N’s not ready to be put back on the roster.”

Scott gave Logan a questioning look, but didn’t press it. “Okay. I’ll still have her benched then. But I’m not telling her.”

“I can handle it.”

Could he? You would either be grateful that Logan had said that answer, or extremely pissed off. And he would have to wait a few hours to even find out. You were busy teaching a class.

“Okay, then I have a second question,” Scott continued. “You haven’t been on a mission since the pregnancy either. Are you ready? Or is this a question I should be asking Y/N?”

Logan took another moment to think. He felt ready. In fact, he was spending way too much time training, just trying to get all these pent up emotions out of him. Logan talked to you about how he was feeling, so you knew. Maybe going on the occasional mission would help him to heal.

“I’m ready,” Logan answered. “I don’t want little missions though. Only when the whole team is needed. I’m still needed here. With Y/N.”

“Understood.”

~~~

After class, you found yourself in the woods, far in the back of the property. You had a little fire pit made of lava rock that Logan built for you years ago. The quiet place had become more sacred since you buried Jimmy out here. You lit the fire with a slight movement of your fingers and sat yourself down against one of the big trees. You just needed a moment to breathe, just by yourself. There were harder days and easier days when it came to the loss of your son and the multiple timelines in your head. Today seemed to be a harder one.

Closing your eyes, you let yourself fall asleep and dream of previous memories and raising your son. At first, the dream was positive, light and bubbly. And then it quickly took a dark turn, ensnaring you in it’s dark tentacles, preventing you from waking up and seeing the sparks fly off you and onto the trees.

~~~

“Has anyone seen my wife?” Logan asked.

Logan had gone to your classroom once he was done for the day, only to find it empty. He then searched the lower level and your shared bedroom before heading to the kitchen, where most of the adults were.

“Last time I saw her, she was in her classroom,” Ororo answered.

“She’s not in there,” stated Logan. “I can’t find her anywhere.”

“Bobby! Storm! Bobby!” Rogue shouted as she rushed into the room. “Has anyone seen Bobby?! Or Storm?!”

“What’s going on, kid?”

“There’s a fire at the far end of the—“

Logan didn’t wait until Rogue was finished before be had bursted out of the back door and was sprinting to the back of the property. There were flames licking the tops of the trees and black smoke rising. Ororo had summoned rain clouds and it began raining over the fire.

“Y/N!” Logan yelled. “Sweetheart!” His paced quickened when he saw you slumped against the tree. “Y/N!” He was by your side in an instant, ignoring the flames surging around. “Hey, princess, wake up for me.” His hands came up to cup your heated face. Logan grounded his teeth at the burning pain but didn’t let up. You gasped, lurching forward as your eyes frantically searched around. “Hey, hey, hey. Focus on me, sweetheart. I’ve got you.” Your eyes more more focused on the smoke, flames, and rain around you while tears started down your face. “Princess, please. Look at me. Focus on me.” Your eyes finally snapped to his. “There’s my girl.”

“I—I’m s-s-sorry…” you stuttered, heaving breaths.

“It’s okay, princess. Everything’s okay. Storm’s puttin’ out the fires. No one else got hurt.”

Your heart dropped. “Someone got hurt?”

“Just you, sweetheart. Come on.”

Logan lifted you up before you could say anything else. Your arms weakly wrapped around his neck as you melted into his hold. Everyone who had gathered around watched silently as Logan carried you back to the mansion. Logan’s senses focused in on your irregularly beating heart, trying to calm his own frantic worries. He took you back to your bedroom and set you down on the bed.

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered as he pulled away.

He shook his head. “No, princess. Don’t apologize.”

“My mind took control. I couldn’t—“

“Sssshhhh.” He sat down and held you. “It’s okay… It’s okay.”

Logan held you while you cried until you fell back asleep. Once he was sure you were completely out of it, Logan slipped out and headed down to Charles’ office. Charles was still in there, sitting near the window, staring at the grounds that you had burnt down.

“Professor?” Logan said as he entered.

“Come in, Logan,” Charles urged. “Let’s have a chat.”

Logan sighed as he shut the door and went over to sit beside Charles. He rested his arms against his knees and leaned forward, hands clasped together. The two men sat in silence for a few minutes.

“I thought she was gettin’ better,” Logan admitted quietly. “I thought… It’s been a year.”

“A loss like the one you two shared isn’t a simple fix, Logan,” Charles responded.

“I think… I think I need to take her away.”

“If you take her away now, Logan, she’ll never come back.”

“Then tell me what to do, Charles. Tell me how to fix this.”

Charles sighed, thinking for a moment. “Maybe you take her away, but not too far. The opposite end of the property has a small one room cabin. Where the two of you can still be a part of everything around here, but have more of your privacy.”

“But what else can I do? She’s my wife. I want to— I need to fix this.”

“This isn’t a fight you can charge into, Logan. This is a long uphill climb that will never end. It will get easier with time. But a grief like this stays with you forever. Though… I did have a small mission that I was going to send you two on before the events of today.”

“Y/N is in no place for a mission.”

“Maybe it’s just what she needs. It’s a simple mission. I’ve been in contact with a young mutant located in Mexico. I want her retrieved and brought back here.”

“You know a mission like that is never as simple as it sounds.”

“Back up will be on standby.”

“She’s not ready.”

“Have you asked her? Maybe it will be the thing that will make her start to feel normal again. Talk to her in the morning.” Charles wheeled back and turned around, stopping before he headed out. “You can’t make every decision for her, Logan. Even right now. Even if you mean well.” Then he rolled out, leaving Logan to his thoughts.

~~~

You woke up cuddled into Logan. His arms were firmly around you. Glancing up at him, you were met with his eyes already staring at you.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he muttered, leaning down and kissing the top of your head.

“Hey,” you hummed. “Did you sleep?”

“No.” Logan pulled you on top of him, securing you tightly to him with a sigh. “You scared me out there.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“I know, princess, I know.” Silence enveloped you both for a long while before Logan spoke up again. “I don’t think we’re doing as good as we think we are.”

“I think you’re right.”

“Scott asked if I felt you were ready for missions before the fire started.”

“What did you tell him?”

“I told him no. I don’t think you’re ready and I think today proved it.”

You pushed your up so that you could look down at Logan. “And what if I feel differently?”

“Honey—“

“No. What if I feel like it could help me get some of this grief out in a different way? Did you seriously make a decision for me without talking it through together?”

“I am just trying to keep you safe. I’m worried and I know that your emotions can control your powers and I don’t— I cannot lose you, darlin’. It would seriously kill me.” He took your hands, carefully holding them in his large, rough ones. He sighed. “Charles also mentioned a mission. A small one. A young mutant that needs to be retrieved from Mexico. Charles says that people will be on standby if something goes wrong.”

“And you said no?”

“I said you weren’t ready.”

You pulled your hands free from his grip and got off the bed. You paced back and forth along the side of the bed. “You can’t— I thought that we were passed making decisions for each other.”

“Sweetheart, you have to understand, I don’t know what else to do. I can’t attack this grief like I would anything else battling against you. This is something I’ve never experienced before, for my self or someone that I love. So making decisions is they one thing I can do.”

“No, making decisions together is the thing that we can do to help us through this. Together is the key word.”

“I didn’t mean to upset you, princess. You gotta know that.”

“I know. But it still did.” You stopped pacing and stood at the other end of the bed. “I’m going on that mission. Tomorrow.”

“Okay, I’ll tell Charles and Scott and we’ll head out—“

“Alone.”

Logan shook his head. “Not a chance, honey. You know that doesn’t fly with me. We do this together.”

“You benched me, I’m benching you now.”

He stood up and reached for you but you pulled back. “Can we not do this, sweetheart? Let’s sleep on it. Please. Come back to bed.”

“No,” you crossed your arms over your chest, almost pouting like a child. You stepped back, hitting against the bedroom door.

“I’ll sleep in the chair or on the floor. Just, please, come back to bed, princess. We can deal with this in the morning.”

“Will we deal with it? Or will you just tell me how I’m going to deal with it?”

Logan sighed, taking another careful step toward you. “I didn’t mean hurt you in making those decisions.”

“Well, you did.”

“I know. I know. And I know that I will have to work for your forgiveness. But can we go to bed and revisit everything in the morning? Please, sweetheart.”

“You’ll sleep in the chair?”

“If that’s what you want.”

You sighed, shoulder shagging. “No… it’s not what I want.”

Logan stepped closer, slowly wrapping his arms around you. You leaned into him, not hugging back. The two of you stood like that for a still tense silent moment.

“Logan,” you whispered against his chest. “Take me to bed and hold me.”

“Anything, sweetheart… anything.”

~~~

The next morning, Logan’s arms were still wrapped around you. The two of you laid there, both awake but let the silence swirl between you.

“I need to go on that mission,” you finally whispered. “With or without you.”

“You’re not going anywhere without me, princess,” Logan mumbled. “Ever… We do this together.”

~~~

Despite his hatred for flying, Logan still insisted on flying you both to the mission in Mexico. The two of you landed on top of a building near the facility. Logan scanned the area from the rooftop, focusing on the facility that you were supposed to infiltrate. You noticed the moment Logan tensed, shoulders tight, nostrils twitching.

“You smell anything?” You asked.

“Metal. Chemicals. Blood,” Logan murmured. “But there’s somethin’ else… somethin’ weird. Familiar.”

You exchanged an uneasy look before the two of you began approaching the facility. You moved in sync— quiet, fast, efficient. The place looked abandoned, but you both knew better than to trust appearances.

Inside, the halls were narrow and sterile. Fluorescent lights flickered overhead, casting a sickly glow on rusted lab equipment and locked doors.

“Kid’s in there,” Logan muttered, sniffing the air near a sealed chamber.

He slid his claws out and sliced through the control panel. The door hissed open. Both of you stepped inside cautiously. In the center of the room sat a small girl— maybe eleven, maybe twelve. She was crouched, wild-eyed, her dark hair tangled, fists clenched at her sides. She wore a hospital gown stained with blood. Her knuckles were split open. Then you saw them. Two gleaming claws, slowly extending from her clenched fists. You froze.

“Logan…” you gasped.

“I see it,” he responded.

The girl didn’t move. She just watched. Her eyes flicked between you both like she was deciding what to do with the two of you.

“Hey,” you called softly, crouching down to her eye level. “It’s okay. We’re not here to hurt you.”

No response. Just breathing— sharp and shallow.

“She’s got claws,” Logan said slowly, his tone unreadable. “Like me.”

“Could just be a coincidence,” you tried to explain it off. “Some kind of… replication experiment?”

Logan didn’t answer. His jaw clenched tighter as he stared at the girl. You turned your focus back onto the girl, stepping forward slightly.

“What’s your name, sweetie?” You asked.

She hesitated. “Laura,” she rasped.

“Do you know where you are? What they were doing here?”

“Tests. Training. Fighting.”

You took a slow breath. “Okay. We’re gonna get you out of here.”

The only movement Laura made was the claws sliding out of her feet. Logan stepped in front of you.

“We’re not the enemy, kid,” he told her, voice hard.

Laura’s gaze snapped to him. She sniffed— subtle but purposeful. Her head tilted. “You smell like me,” she noted quietly.

“What?” Logan’s brow furrowed as he questioned.

“You smell the same… but older.”

You and Logan exchanged a loaded look.

“She could be a clone,” you suggested, not biding the unease in your voice.

“Or somethin’ worse,” muttered Logan. “They’ve tried before.”

Just then, the alarm blared overhead. Red lights pulsed. Doors slammed shut in the distance.

“They’re coming,” Laura said flatly.

“Time to move!” Logan growled, stepping forward.

Laura didn’t resist as he grabbed her arm and pushed her toward the exit. The three of you ran through the facility. Gunfire began to ring out from the far side of the hallway. You threw up a wall of fire and turned to Logan, your eyes flowing faintly with your powers in a way they hadn’t in a while.

“You get her to the jet,” you told him. “I’ve got this.”

“No, sweetheart—“

“Logan. Trust me.”

He stared at you for a beat longer, reading in between the lines. He sighed, nodding. “I’ll get her to the jet. But if I have to come back in here for you, you are never leaving the mansion again.”

You gave him a smirk. “I’ll be right behind you.”

You turned back, enforcing your fire wall. Logan watched you for a second more before pulling Laura along with him. You let your emotions bleed into your flames. The grief. The sadness. The hope. The purpose. You weren’t broken. You were just… healing. The long way round. And maybe helping someone else was the first step back to helping yourself.

~~~

Outside, Logan strapped Laura into a seat before his focus turned back to the facility. He hated not being by your side, but he also knew—deep down—that you needed this moment. To fight. To protect. To reclaim something of yourself. And when you finally appeared through the smoke, walking calmly, power humming just beneath your skin, Logan’s breath caught in his throat. You met his gaze and for the first time since you lost your little boy, there was peace in your eyes.

“You okay?” He asked, quickly meeting you at the bottom of the jet.

You nodded. “Yeah… I am.”

He opened his arms without hesitation, and you stepped into them, finally allowing yourself to relax.

“Let’s go home,” you whispered.

~~~

The jet touched down back at the mansion just before sunset. Laura hadn’t said a word since Mexico. She sat quiet, her eyes darting with practice wariness. Jean and Hank were already waiting in the hangar when you lowered the jet steps.

“She’s injured,” Jean stated, already stepping towards Laura, calm and careful.

“She’s not gonna let you touch her,” Logan warned. “She’s… defensive.”

Laura glared at Jean but didn’t resist as the redhead knelt down in front of her.

“You’re safe now, alright?” Jean said softly. “No more tests. No more needles. Just a few scans so we can make sure you’re okay.”

Laura eyed her suspiciously before look at you. You gave her an encouraging nod and a smile. Then Laura looked back at Jean with a nod.

“We’ll take her from here,” Hank said.

You and Logan watched them lead Laura further into the lower levels.

The moment they disappeared, Logan huffed. “Charles knew.”

“He always knows,” you sighed.

Logan stormed inside without another word, you following close behind. His boots thudded against the polished floors as you made your way toward Charles’ office. He was already there, of course, sitting near the window as if he’d been waiting.

“Logan, Y/N,” he greeted calmly.

Logan didn’t hesitate. “What the hell did they do?”

“They created her using your genetic material.”

You inhaled sharply. “They cloned him?” You kept still as Logan began pacing liking a caged animal.

“Not a direct clone. It’s more complicated than that. Her genome was engineered using Logan’s DNA, yes. But the result is… different. Laura has two X chromosomes. They spliced up the genetic code with a donor egg to stabilize the process. She wasn’t grown in a tank— she was born, raised in a lab.”

“So… she’s… his daughter?”

“In everyday that matters? Yes.”

Logan’s hands were curled into fists, claws threatened to poke out. “You knew this!” He exclaimed. “You sent us there knowing who she was!”

“I suspected. But it had to be you two who saw her first. If I’d told you everything, you wouldn’t have gone.”

“You’re damn right I wouldn’t have! They made a weapon outta me. Again! And now she’s just a kid with my blood and their scars.”

“Logan,” your voice called out to him through the haze of his anger. He spun to face you. “She’s… your daughter.”

“No. No.” He shook his head. “I… We… We were supposed to have a kid. Together. A mix of the two of us. This… This is… She’s an experiment. She’s—“

“Your daughter. And you are not going to push her aside.”

“But—“

“Logan,” you reached out and took a hold of his hands. “This… This may be our chance. I know it’s strange and it’s not the same. But… I think that this is the universe granting us what we want.”

“I sent the two of you on that mission for a reason,” Charles added.

Logan focused on you, eyes scanning yours to make sure you were okay. All he saw was hope staring back at him. He sighed, tension slipping from his shoulders.

“We can do this,” you told him softly, stepping closer. “Together. Like… like we’ve been meaning to. Okay?”

“I saw it in her, she’s got my rage,” Logan mumbled. “You prepared for that?”

“I’ve dealt with your rage in every lifetime. I think I can handle a mini you. You think you can handle two women in your life?”

“If one of them is you, then yes.” He wrapped his arms around you. “So, we really doin’ this?”

“Yes.”

“Together?”

“Always.”

Chapter Text

To say Logan was nervous was an understatement. First off, he hated flying. Second of all, he had never planned a trip like this before, let alone by himself. You had been pestering him for years about going on a vacation, a true vacation, but he always found an excuse to brush it off. Now that your anniversary was nearing, Logan wanted to do something special for the two of you. Logan was going to surprise you with a ten-day trip to Hawaii. He had rented a small house with a private beach for the week, just the two of you. He could only hope that you’d like it.

It was a Saturday, so Logan wasn’t working. You had slipped out to run some errands by yourself, allowing Logan to prepare how he was going to tell you about the trip. He had bought a new swimsuit for you, something he hoped you would like in his favorite color to see you in. He placed it in a bag and set it on the counter.

Anxious about the present, Logan waited for you outside, keeping himself busy with chopping wood and working on his bike. When his ears picked up the sound of the truck, Logan quickly set the tools down and wiped his hands clean on his jeans before standing to meet you.

You smiled as you caught sight of Logan waiting for you outside. You parked the truck, and Logan was there in no time, opening your door.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted, leaning forward and meeting your lips for a brief kiss.

“Hey, honey,” you replied. “You been waiting for me?”

“Maybe.” He smirked. “What can I grab?”

“Everything’s in the back seat.”

“I’ll grab everything. You head inside.”

“Are you sure? I can–”

“Go. I can handle a few grocery bags.”

You kissed his cheek before heading inside. It didn’t take you long to notice the gift bag sitting on the counter. “Uh, Logan? What’s with the bag?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he responded, coming in with all the grocery bags.

“So you won’t mind me taking a look inside then?”

He shrugged. “Nope.”

With curious eyes, you peeked into the bag and pulled out the new swimsuit. You held it up, studying it, before peeking back into the bag. There was nothing else in it.

“Thanks, honey,” you said, trying to mask the utter confusion you were feeling. “I needed a new swimsuit?”

“Fuck, I didn’t think this all the way through,” he muttered.

“What is going on, Logan?”

He sighed, running a frustrated hand up his face and through his hair. “I’m taking you to Hawaii.”

The swimsuit dropped to the ground. “What?”

“Tomorrow. You and me. Hawaii.”

“You–You’re serious?”

“Very.”

You squealed and jumped up into Logan’s arms. He caught you with a laugh as your arms wrapped around his neck and your legs wrapped around his torso.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

Logan pressed a kiss to your neck. “You’re welcome, sweetheart.”

You pulled your head away enough to look at him. “Are you sure you can handle it? I know how you feel about flying, and not to mention the water. Do you–”

Logan shut you up with a kiss. “Your reaction sealed the deal, baby. I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“I’m the one who planned it, didn’t I?”

“Yes, but–”

“Nope. We’re going.”

You squealed again, going back to hugging him tightly. “I love you so much!”

He chuckled in your grip. “I love you more.”

~~~

Logan knew he had made the right choice as he watched you bounce around the airport. He couldn’t help but watch you with a loving smile. You were so excited that it was becoming contagious. It was helping put his anxieties at ease, especially since he had a few more surprises up his sleeves once you two reached Hawaii.

“Oh, Logan! Let’s–”

He quickly grabbed your hand and pulled you into him. “No more stops, sweetheart. We haven’t even gone through security yet. We can explore more once we’re past that.”

“Oh. Right. Let’s go!”

Logan laughed as you tried to tug him along. He willingly followed you to the security line. To distract himself from the oncoming pat down he would be forced to have, he wrapped you up in his arms and held your back against his chest. He also needed to make sure you didn’t happily wander off before you hit security. You leaned back into him, completely content with him holding you still as you waited in line.

“Are you guys newlyweds?” A kind old lady asked as she stood behind you in line, watching you and Logan.

“No,” you responded with a smile. “We’ve been married for a few years now and have been together for even longer.”

“Well, it’s nice to see two young people such as yourselves so happily in love still.”

You and Logan had to bite back a laugh. If only this woman knew that Logan was 183 and you were 85. You were probably older than the woman herself.

“Thank you, ma’am,” Logan responded. “I got lucky.” He kissed your temple as you melted into him.

The lady smiled and looked at you. “You’ve got yourself a keeper there, dearie.”

You patted Logan’s arm that was around you. “Yes, I do,” you replied before meeting his lips for a kiss.

When you reached the security checkpoint, you gave Logan another kiss.

“I’ll be right in front of you,” you told him, knowing that he hated situations like this.

“Okay,” he responded, sneaking another brief kiss before he let you go.

He watched as you walked through the checkpoint with ease before turning around to wait for him. You shot him a smile as he stepped toward the TSA agent.

“I’ll take the pat down,” Logan stated.

The agent turned to his colleagues, “opt-out.”

You moved to a place where you wouldn't get yelled at to move, but you could still watch Logan. He was pulled to the side by multiple TSA agents and given an uncomfortable pat down. When he was done, he quickly made his way to your side.

“I hate that," he muttered, putting his arm around you and guiding you away from security.

You turned and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for doing it.”

Logan's tension slipped from his shoulders at your gratitude. He appreciated that you knew how hard all this was for him and you weren't going to be mean about it. Arms wrapped around each other's backs, and the two of you headed to the gate and waited to board.

“We'd like to welcome aboard our first-class passengers,” the flight attendant announced.

Logan got up and held out his hand. “Come on, princess.”

“Are you serious?" you questioned.

“Very.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you up. “Let’s go.”

Logan got your tickets scanned in and led you onto the plane. He handed the tickets to the welcoming fight attendant, who happily guided the both of you to your seats. Your seats were large and connected, almost like a single seat. There were two screens as well as blankets, pillows, headphones, and sleeping masks provided. You were frozen in your spot. Logan pressed a kiss to your head before he guided you into a seat and sat beside you. He pushed the armrest between the two of you up and pulled you into his side.

“Logan,” you breathed out, still taking it all in. “How did you do all of this? I mean, this isn’t in your realm of normal romantic gestures. And I know our money situation. Unless you are stashing money away without my knowledge because if you—oof!”

Logan shut you up with his lips against yours. You melted into him, allowing him to lead the kiss. He eventually pulled away with a chuckle. “Don't worry about it, darlin’. I've got everything handled and paid for.”

“But—"

His hand clamped over your mouth. “I’m serious, baby. No worrying about anything. This is a vacation— our first vacation. Relax. Enjoy.”

“Fine.” You huffed, cuddling into his side. “But you’re my pillow for the flight."

“Won't expect anything else.”

~~~

Logan insisted on bringing in the travel bags and the groceries you'd picked up from the rental car while you explored. The house was perfect and simple. It had a laundry room near the entrance. Then, a bedroom and bathroom. In the back of the house was the kitchen and living room with floor-to-ceiling windows looking out at the beach and ocean. There was a door leading out to the porch, which was practically on the beach. You ended up on the beach, shoes tossed on the porch, heading to the water.

You took a deep breath as you stepped into the water and let the small waves wash over your feet. You looked around and noticed that there were large bushes on either side of the house all the way down to the water, making the area private. Logan was really pulling out all the stops for you. You don't know what you ever did to deserve a man like him.

Logan watched from the porch as you stood at the shoreline. He could see that all the tension and anxieties from the years had washed out to the ocean. You were completely relaxed, the thing he hoped to accomplish from this. With skeptical eyes, Logan glanced down at the sand. This was not his thing: beaches and water. In fact, he hated water since his adamantium skeleton because he could easily sink. But he would push that all aside for these ten days just to see you smile and relax.

With a huff, Logan toed of his shoes and ripped off his socks. He tossed them to the side before he leaned down and rolled up his jeans a bit. Eyes focused on you, Logan walked over to you. He could tell you were completely unaware, allowing him to quietly wrap his arms around you and pull you back into him. You allowed yourself to fully relax into him.

“This place, Logan,” you said quietly, taking in the vast ocean. “It’s absolutely breathtaking.”

He pressed a kiss below your ear. “You like it?”

"I love it." You turned around in his arms and placed your hands at the base of his neck, allowing your fingers to move through the hairs there. “I love you, Logan.”

“I love you, baby.” He pulled you in for a kiss. It was slow but full of passion and love.

“Do you want to go test the bed?”

He chuckled before quickly swinging you up to hold you bridal style. “Always."

~~~

The two of you could hardly take your hands off each other throughout the ten days. When you weren't having sex, you were sitting beside each other. Or you were sitting or laying on top of Logan. The couch was perfect for cuddling or for you to watch as Logan cooked. He wasn't letting you lift a finger this trip.

Most of the trip consisted of you two being naked or in your swimsuits. You had never seen Logan in swim trunks until this trip, and you were definitely not complaining. The man was a beautifully sculpted specimen that you could spend all day staring at.

“Come on, Logan!” You tugged at his arm as you tried to get him down to the water, but he wasn't budging. “I’m not asking you to swim; I’m just asking you to get in waist-deep.”

“Not doin’ it, sweetheart," he said with a shake of his head. “I'll watch you though.”

“Fine.”

You threw his hand down and stomped down to the beach dramatically. He smirked as he watched you head down to the water. When you were waist-deep, you turned around and tried to pose seductively. Logan laughed.

“Nice try, darlin’!” He shouted.

You pouted and crouched down so that your body was in the water beside your head. Logan rolled his eyes as he watched you. Suddenly, you came up with a devious idea. Taking a deep breath, you pulled yourself underwater. Logan took a few steps closer to get a better look at you in the clear water.

“Okay, honey, time to get up," he said firmly. When you didn't appear, a flicker of anxiety sparked within him. “Y/N, sweetheart. This isn't funny." Still, you remained underwater.

Logan rushed down the rest of the beach and into the water. His hands grabbed your arms and pulled you up and into his arms. You coughed out a laugh as he carried you to the beach.

"Got ya,” you teased.

“Not funny, sweetheart,” Logan said, his tone serious. “You really scared me."

Your hand came up to his cheek and rubbed against his beard. “I'm sorry.”

“You’re going to be because I'm not letting you go the rest of the day."

~~~

It was the last night. Logan had got some wood to make a fire and you had easily lit it. You were sitting between Logan’s legs, back to his chest, while his arms firmly kept you there.

"Logan?" you whispered.

“Hmm?" He hummed.

“I, uh... there's something I want to talk to you about. Something that's been on my mind for a while.”

He kissed your head. “What is it?”

“I've been thinking that we need to go back to the mansion… that we need to go back and be with our friends.”

"After all this time?"

"I can't explain it. Something is pulling my thoughts there constantly… I think we need to go back.” Logan nodded as you turned your head to look at his face. You could tell that he was thinking it all through. “And I’m not saying we sell the cabin or anything like that. We can go back and forth… I know it's a big decision. Just… think about it okay?”

“Honey… if it's what you want, we'll go back.”

“What do you want?"

“Honestly, I've been thinking about heading back too.”

“So, you’re in?”

“Sweetheart, wherever you go, I’m following.”

Chapter Text

2015

The mansion was exactly the same as you and Logan drove up to it. Your fingers were anxiously tapping against your knee as Logan pulled up to the front. After parking the car, he reached over and took your hand.

“We can turn around,” he offered. “It’s not too late.”

You looked at Logan. “Do you not want to do this?”

He sighed. “I think that twelve years is a long time, and none of us exactly stayed in touch.” He brought your hand up and kissed the back of it. “But, I think we need to try to be here.”

“Thank you. You know I—“

You cut yourself off as a familiar wheelchair wheeled out of the mansion. Your full action fell on it as you gasped. There, waiting, was Charles. He was alive and seemingly well.

“Fucking hell,” Logan muttered.

Still in shock, the two of you exited the truck and stepped around it.

“Charles?” You questioned.

“I knew you two would eventually return,” Charles said with a smile. “Welcome back.”

“How…?” Logan questioned, coming up to your side to take your hand.

“It’s a long story. Why don’t the two of you come inside? Everyone will be happy to see you.”

~~~

Charles had been right; your friends were happy to see you and Logan. Ororo, Hank, Bobby, Marie, and Kitty were all there in Charles’ office to greet you. Apparently, they had been thinking about reaching out when Charles informed them that you were already on your way. Yes, it was a bit awkward; so much time had passed since you all were last together.

During your reunion, Charles explained how he survived his supposed death by Jean’s hands. His consciousness had jumped into another body that was in a pro-mutant doctor’s care. The doctor and Charles found several mutants that worked for years to piece Charles’ body back together. Charles came back to the mansion about seven years ago, immediately resuming his role as headmaster.

Bobby and Marie shared the news that they were married, while Hank told you that he had retired from politics and was now back being a full-time teacher. Ororo was still teaching with Bobby, Marie, Kitty, and Colossus also teaching now.

“If you would like, we have positions for both of you,” Charles added.

You looked at Logan. You could see that he was hesitant. “We would like to stay a while,” you responded. “Could we get back to you on that?”

“Of course,” Charles smiled. “Your rooms are still available. Though I suspect you will only be needing one.”

“Thanks,” Logan muttered. “I’ll go get our things.” He kissed your head before leaving.

You sighed, starting to feel like you were forcing this upon Logan. Charles rolled up to you and took your hand.

“Why don’t we go talk?” He suggested. “Just us two?”

“Okay, lead the way,” you said.

You followed Charles out to the garden, to a bench you once frequented often. You sat as Charles moved his chair in front of you.

“He won’t run,” Charles stated, clearly reading your mind.

“I know that. I just… I was ready to come back, but maybe he wasn’t.”

“Logan’s ready. It’s just a lot at once.”

You nodded in agreement, glancing around. “It doesn’t seem like you have as many students as you once did.”

Charles sighed. “That is true. Unfortunately, fewer and fewer people are showing mutant abilities. Hank has done some research on it. He thinks something is being put in the food that prevents the x-gene from being passed on.”

“That’s terrible.”

“Yes, but it is something we cannot control. So we will do the best with what we have.”

“I’ve missed you, Charles.”

“I missed you, too. It seems like the time alone with Logan has done the two of you well.”

“Yes, it was much needed.”

“You should go rest. Unpack. I’m glad that you are back, Y/N.”

“Me, too.”

~~~

You found Logan in your old room, standing at the window. You walked over and wrapped your arms around him, resting your head against his back.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“What?” Logan questioned, turning his head to try to look at you.

“I’m sorry if I forced you to come back.”

“You didn’t force me to do anything. I wanted to come back.”

“Are you sure?”

He grabbed your hands and pulled them off of him before tugging you around to his front. “I’m sure. You know how I get around people. I’ll be fine. Just give me some time.”

“Okay.”

He pulled you closer. And allowed his forehead to rest against you. “You know I love you, right?”

“Of course. I know you, too.” You kissed his nose. “Wanna see how squeaky the bed got?”

Logan smiled before tossing you onto the bed.

~~~

2019

Logan looked into the mirror with a scowl. His graying hair was laughing at him, showing signs that he had begun to age. There was also the fact that he had begun to feel more aches and pains in his joints. He was doing his best to hide it from you. He didn’t want you to worry.

You leaned against the bathroom doorway, arms folded. You have been noticing that Logan was grunting and groaning with certain movements and spending more time glaring at himself in the mirror than usual. He was graying, and while you found it attractive, you knew that Logan hated it.

“Stop that,” you finally spoke up. His eyes snapped to yours in the reflection.

“Stop what?” He mumbled.

“You know what.” You pushed yourself off the doorway and pulled his arm. He slowly turned to face you. You gave him a smile as your hands cupped his cheeks. Your thumbs moved across his greying facial hair. “Stop getting mad at your body.”

“I shouldn’t be greying.”

“Everyone grows old, Logan. Even you.”

“Yes, but… what if… well… do you… I mean—“

You pulled him in for a kiss, shutting him up for a moment. “You’re still sexy to me, honey. Always will be.”

“But—“

“Stop it. When my grays and wrinkles become more apparent, are you going to change how you see me?”

Logan’s hands found your waist and tugged you closer. “No… you’d still be gorgeous.”

“Okay. Well, it’s the same with you… You are handsome.” You pulled him in for another quick kiss. “If you need another reminder, please come to me.”

“Okay.”

“What else is on your mind?”

“Nothing. I’m good.”

“Liar.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Logan,” you sighed. “I know you. What’s going on?”

“Just tired. Overworking.”

“Maybe less training exercises then.”

“If you’re in the Danger Room, I’m in the Danger Room. You know the rule.”

“Yes, but—“

“I’m fine, sweetheart.” He pecked your lips. “Thank you for the pick me up. I’ve got a meeting with Hank I’ve got to get to.” He let go and slipped past you.

“Meet me for lunch?”

“Always.”

~~~

“I wish I had better news for you, Logan,” Hank said. The two were sitting in the lab alone, with Logan’s test results on the screen.

“So, you’re telling me that the adamantium is poisoning me?” Logan wanted to clarify.

“Unfortunately. It wasn’t meant to be grafted to anyone like this. The only reason you’ve survived this long is because of your healing mutation. But I guess it’s even caught up with that.”

“How much time do I have?”

“There’s no telling. You have already complained of aching joints and the graying of your hair as well as the occasional slow healing. I guess that all of that will only get worse, but your mutation is still fighting against it. You could have a good ten to twenty years. Maybe even thirty if you take it easy.”

Logan huffed, leaning forward as he ran a hand down his face. “Is there anything you can do?”

“Nothing that would last long enough with your mutation… You should tell Y/N.”

“No,” Logan shook his head, sitting up. “I can’t do that.”

“Logan—“

“No one is telling anyone about this! Got it? Especially Y/N. I can’t have her worrying about me… Not yet.”

“You’ll want to tell her sooner or later. She’s known you for a long time. She’ll be able to figure it out.”

“Not if I have any say.”

~~~

2024

As the years passed, Logan continued to keep the secret from you. You kept questioning him as his movements and healing continued to slow. You never got a straight answer, which was frustrating. But you knew that Logan would tell you eventually. Well, at least you hoped.

Logan grunted as he fixed his tie, annoyed that his shoulders were bugging him.

“You okay, honey?” You asked from the bathroom as you finished getting ready.

“I’m fine,” he replied.

You peeked your head out, unbelieving. “You sure?” You noticed how he was struggling with his tie. “Here.” You walked over and took the tie from him. “I got you.” He huffed as he dropped his hands and let you take over. “There.” You straightened and patted his chest. “All done.”

“What would I do without you?”

“Look like a homeless man.”

“Hey!”

“Don’t worry. I’d love you anyway.”

“Good.” Logan pulled you in for a kiss. “You ready to go?”

“Mhm,” you hummed. “Take me on a date, handsome.”

~~~

2026

“You need to see Hank,” you were fed up.

“I’m fine,” Logan retorted.

The two of you were standing in your shared room. You were by the door, blocking it, as Logan was across the room near the window.

“Bullshit!” You exclaimed. “You’re clearly in pain, and you’re not healing the same. You’re scarring. You don’t scar.”

“I do now. It’s no big deal.”

“Yes, it is, Logan! You need to tell me what’s going on.”

“Or what?”

The challenge silenced the room. The two of you glared at each other as the tension thickened.

“What do you even want me to say to that?” You questioned. “What do you want me to do?”

“Nothing! I want you to do nothing,” he spat. “Trust that I’m fine.”

“But you’re not! And it’s killing me to see you like this and not know how to help you. I can’t stand by and watch you kill yourself.”

“Then don’t.”

“What?”

“Then don’t stand by and watch.”

“Do you… Are you telling me to walk away? Are you serious?”

“If you can’t handle it, then—“

“I don’t even know what’s going on! Logan,” you took a step forward, “please, honey, please be honest with me. I want to help. I want— AH!”

A high-pitched noise rang out, piercing your brain. You froze, unable to move. Logan, though it was extremely painful, could move. The mansion was rumbling. Something was going on, and Logan needed to figure out what. Each movement he made felt like he was fighting against a strong current. Logan reached you, only to not be able to get any words out to call to you. He groaned as he silently promised to come back to you and headed out in the hallway.

Everyone else in the mansion was in the same situation as you. As he headed downstairs, the force pushing against him grew stronger. His claws released slowly as he used them to anchor himself against the wall as he continued downward. Once he was on the main level, he used his claws to crawl his way to where he could feel the force coming from: Charles’ office.

From the doorway, Logan could see Charles writhing in his wheelchair, groaning in pain. The force was so strong that it took Logan over ten minutes to get to Charles. Logan gripped Charles’ legs, trying to do what he could to gather Charles’ focus. But there was nothing he could do.

Charles’ seizure lasted exactly twenty-four minutes. As soon as it stopped, Logan was rushing back to you, ignoring all the bodies that lay around the floor. When he got back to the bedroom, you had collapsed to the floor. Logan fell to the ground and pulled you into him.

“Y/N, sweetheart,” he called, “wake up.” His heart was sinking as blood trailed from your nose and ears. “Baby, please.” He could hear your heartbeat, but there was no sign of consciousness. “Wake up… wake up.”

~~~

Logan stood by your bed at the hospital, not willing to sit down or touch you. All the information was rotating through his mind.

Charles had a seizure.

Charles has Alzheimer’s.

Hank, Ororo, Bobby, Marie, Kitty, and two others died due to the incident.

Charles’ abilities stretched far beyond the mansion, causing over 600 other injuries.

You were in a coma with no sign of waking up anytime soon.

Charles’ mind was now labeled a weapon of mass destruction, and the government was coming to detain him.

Logan wasn’t about to let that happen. His hands were trembling as he took your hand, his other hand stroking your face.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I have to protect Charles… I have to protect you… I hope that you’ll forgive me one day.” He held a kiss to your forehead as he closed his eyes, letting a tear slip down. “I love you so much, baby. I’m so sorry.”

Then Logan left… without even a second glance.

Chapter Text

Everything hurt. That was your first thought. Your second thought was, why are your limbs bound? You forced yourself to remain still as you opened your eyes to survey your surroundings. You were in a hospital bed, surrounded by hospital equipment, but it was clear you were in a large truck, similar to an ambulance. Glancing down your body, you realized that you were bound at your wrists and ankles. But it was nothing that you couldn’t take care of with a little bit of flames. Upon hearing footsteps, you closed your eyes again and tried to remain calm.

“Still out,” a man’s voice commented.

“Yeah, well, she has been in a coma for four months,” a second man’s voice stated.

Four months? You’ve been in a coma for four months?

“It’s good for Dr. Rice that she’s still out,” the first voice continued. “It will make it easier to do the testing he wants.” The panic in your heart was immediately recorded on the heart rate monitor. “She might be waking. Grab the vial Dr. Rice provided. It should keep her out until we reach Mexico.”

You were not going to Mexico to meet this Dr. Rice. No way in hell. Your eyes snapped open as you allowed flames to cover your body. The men exclaimed as they stumbled back. You burned through the bindings and pushed yourself up. You were immediately lightheaded and dizzy. But you couldn’t allow yourself to dwell on it; you had to get to safety.

Without a second thought, you threw your arms out and sent flames towards the men. They screamed as the fire took hold, both being engulfed in the flames. You noticed that there was a way to get to the driver, who was radioing someone. With shaky legs, you stumbled up to the front and threw fire at the radio and the driver.

The truck swerved before crashing into an electric pole. You were thrown foreword, hitting your head against the consul. You groaned as blood trickled down your face. You needed to find some clothes and get out of there.

After finding some extra pieces of clothing, you jumped out of the truck. With a flick of your wrist, you set fire to the engine, and the truck exploded. Looking around, you realized that you were on a road, but there was a gas station not too far from where you were. You walked down the road and into the gas station.

“Phone,” you rasped, your voice hoarse from lack of use. “Can I use your phone?”

“Sure,” the man motioned to the phone near the wall. “Help yourself.”

You leaned against the wall as you picked up the phone and dialed the first number on your mind: Logan’s. You couldn’t imagine how worried he was or what had happened to him to get you to be separated like this.

“Pick up, pick up, pick up,” you muttered as the phone rang. But no one answered, making your concern grow. There was only one more number you knew, and that was the mansion’s. Holding your breath, you waited for someone to answer.

“Hello?” Colossus’ voice rang through the phone.

“Colossus, it’s me,” you whispered into the phone. “It’s Y/N.”

“Y/N? Where are you? I went to visit you in the hospital, but you were gone. They said you woke up and left.”

“I was taken. I don’t actually know where I am.” You looked around for any sign. “I need Logan. Can you put him on the phone?”

“Y/N… Logan isn’t here.”

“Where is he?”

Colossus sighed. “He left with Charles four months ago after the seizure incident.”

You suddenly remembered what had happened. You and Logan were fighting, then the world froze, and a high-pitched noise sounded.

“Do you know know where he went?” You asked.

“No,” Colossus answered. “He didn’t leave any note or trance. All I know is that Logan took Charles away because the government was after him.”

“He… He left me?”

“Y/N—“

“I need someone to come get me.”

“There’s just me and a few students left. Hank, Ororo, the others… they all died due to the seizure.”

“No…” Tears filled your eyes. This wasn’t happening.

“I can try to find you—“

“No, it’s fine… I’m fine.”

“Y/N—“

“Goodbye, Colossus.” Then you hung up.

Your head fell against the wall as you closed your eyes and let a few tears slip down your cheeks. Logan had left you. Your friends— your family— were all dead. And now you were stranded in the middle of nowhere after having just escaped from being kidnapped. What were you supposed to do now? You didn’t have any money or a place to go. You had no clue where to even begin the search for Logan.

Taking a deep breath, you pushed yourself from the wall. It had been far too long since you needed survival skills like this. You had tried to push down the years you were homeless and completely forget about them. But now they were rushing back, along with all the skills you used to frequently use to survive. You felt awful that you were reverting back to needing those skills, but you really had no choice at the moment. With flames flickering around your fingertips, you walked over to the register.

“I need all the money you have,” you demanded.

The man behind the counter scoffed. “You’re not serious.”

“Actually,” you lifted up one of your hands, a flame resting in the palm of it, “I’m dead serious. I’m also going to need your car.”

~~~

It was months of jumping from motel to motel. Stealing cars, food, and money in order to survive and in order to find Logan. As the months grew on, your unconditional love for the man you called your husband began to fester and grow into anger and rage. How dare he leave you, especially after everything? None of his stupid excuses would be enough to make it up to you. But you were still on the hunt for him. Wanting him to see how much pain he had caused.

After about six months since you woke up, you caught wind of a mysterious Uber driver in Texas. Claims were that he looked like a run-down version of the Wolverine. You had to go check. You drove to El Paso, Texas, where your tip had come from. Your original plan was to stake out a few of the local bars every night, seeing if he was picking up anyone. As you drove to your first target, a limo outside a diner caught your eye. More specifically, the man sitting in the driver’s seat. You turned into the diner’s dirt parking lot and waited. You watched as the man got out of the limo and began to limp towards the diner. Logan’s build and height easily gave him a way to you. With growing anger, you got out of your car, slammed the door, and stomped towards him. Logan immediately stumbled to a stop as the all too familiar scent of your smoke, which had begun wafting off you, struck his senses.

“You selfish son-of-a-bitch!”

Logan flinched at your tone. He knew that sooner or later, you would find him, and he would have to face your wrath. “Y/N,” he curtly said, not even bothering to turn around.

“Really? You won’t even turn around?”

Logan sighed, slowly turning around but not looking at you. You noticed that his shoulders sagged more than before, almost like he was truly carrying the weight of the world. There were more wrinkles on his face and a lot more gray hairs than the last time you had seen him. He had a full-on beard now. There were also scars littering his skin, more signs of his healing ability slowing. You wanted to run up to him, press kisses all over his face, and hold him close, but you couldn’t allow yourself to do that. Not when he hurt you like this.

“I at least deserved a note.”

“I know.”

“You don’t! I woke up six months ago, captured, and not knowing where you were!” Logan tensed at your admission but didn’t make a move or a sound. “I thought we were past this. I thought… I thought that we were in this together.
You could see the chain around his neck that carried your dog tags. A reminder of what the two of you had promised.

“I know.”

“Is that really all you can give me?” He remained silent. You scoffed, trying to push down your emotions. “I don’t know why I thought you’d be happy to see me. You left! Obviously, I don’t matter much to you.” You tugged your ring off your finger and tossed it into the dirt in front of Logan. “If you don’t want me, then I don’t want us.”

Thoughts ran through Logan’s head. He didn’t want to hurt you more than he already had. He wanted to run to you and hold you, only to never let you go. But he needed to keep you away from him, away from Charles, before you ended up dead. “It’s not like we were actually married.”

You gasped, the words making you stumble back like they had actually hit you. “You… you don’t mean that.”

Logan tried to swallow down his emotions that were rising to the surface. The devastation that you weren’t trying to hide at all now, was making him lose his resolve. “I do.”

“Stop it,” your voice was wobbly despite your effort to make it strong. “Stop lying to me… to yourself. Tell me the truth. Why did you leave without me?”

“I had to.”

“Stop it! Stop lying!”

“You know why I left… I had to protect everyone.”

“Bullshit! I’ve heard that too many times over the years to know that we protect each other better when we’re together.”

“I didn’t have a choice. You know that.”

“Do I? Cause I woke up after months of being in a coma– alone and kidnapped! My family dead or on the run. Protection doesn’t have to mean leaving.”

“In this case, it does.” Logan could tell that you were growing angrier as flames flickered at your fingertips. “Just do it. I know you want to… throw the flame.”

It happened before Logan could blink. The large fireball hit his chest and threw him back onto the ground. A large burn graced his chest, where his shirt once covered. You quickly threw smaller fireballs at him as you marched towards him. Logan didn’t even try to fight you; he just laid there and took it, which only made you grow angrier.

“Fight back, you fucking bastard!”

You knelt over him, hitting his chest with heated hands. Tears cascaded down your cheeks without your permission. All Logan could do was take what you were giving him. When your hands started bruising, showing that you were using all your strength, is when he finally grabbed your wrists.

“You’re hurting yourself,” he stated, his concern slipping through.

“I don’t care! I hate you!”

You continued to fight, though his grip on your wrists remained. Eventually, your head fell forward, resting against his chest as the sobs tore their way through you. Logan was quick to wrap his arms around you and hold you close. It didn’t matter that the two of you were lying in the dirt. He was willing to wait as long as it took for you to calm down.

“I hate you,” you whimpered against him, unable to push yourself off of him. “I hate you so much.” Logan stayed silent, rubbing a hand up and down your back. “I thought that we were past the running… I thought… Was it all a lie?”

Logan couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t allow himself to hurt you any further. “…No.”

“Then why did you leave me?”

“It’s the only way to keep you safe. I will not apologize for keeping you alive.”

You pushed against him and threw yourself back onto your feet. “But I wasn’t safe, Logan! I woke up bound and on my way to a doctor who, by the sound of it, experiments on mutants. I had to rescue myself! What would have happened if I couldn’t do that? How safe would I have been then?” Logan sat up with a grunt, keeping his eyes on the ground. “Would you have even been concerned?” Unwanted tears collected in your eyes. “Have you… did you even think about me? Or try to check in on me?”

Logan hated himself. You surrounded his thoughts every second of every day. The heat of the desert reminded him of you and your flames. At night, he wished that you were in his arms. There had been a few times that he had to do a double-take at his Uber passenger, thinking it was you. Logan had wanted to check in on you and your status, but he couldn’t get himself to. Now, it was his second biggest regret, the first being having left you. If he had been checking in on you, he would have been able to get to you before you were taken. He would have been able to see you and hold you. He would have been able to protect you, just like he already thought he was doing. Instead, he let himself suffer for the last ten months without you.

“No,” he pushed himself off the ground, biting back a pained groan. “No, I didn’t check in on you.” And you thought your heart couldn’t shatter any more than it was already. “But you are all I thought about. You were my dreams at night and my daydreams throughout the day.” He took a limped step toward you. Tears were trailing down your face. All he wanted to do was cradle your face and kiss each tear away, but he couldn’t. His fists clenched as he kept himself from touching you. “You are all I think about… but you still need to go. It’s not safe here.”

“What?” You breathed out. “You’re telling me to leave… again?”

“It’s better this way.”

“There’s no way you believe that.” You took a step forward. “James.” The call of his true first name had his eyes snapping to meet yours. “Tell me you don’t love me, and I’ll walk away.”

Logan’s heart and mind were at war. You could see his resolve was cracking.

“I…” His phone buzzed, singling that he was needed for a ride. “I’ve got to go.”

“Logan—“

“Go. Live your life, Y/N… do it for both of us.”

You stood there, heartbroken, as you watched him limp to his limo and drive off. Why couldn’t he understand that the only life you wanted was one with him by your side?

Chapter Text

You couldn’t get yourself to leave El Paso, not yet, anyway. You were still angry at Logan, but you could see the pain he was in, and you couldn’t walk away completely from him. You found yourself a motel room to stay for a while. The first night, your dreams were full of Logan. All the happy memories that now only made your heart break further. When you woke, you were crying. Your right hand went to your left to play with your wedding ring, only for you to find that it was no longer there.

Without a care to how you looked, you rushed out of your room and sped to the diner. You frantically searched through the dirt for your ring. Tears fell into the dirt as you failed to find it. You went into the diner and up to one of the waitresses behind the counter.

“Has anyone turned in a wedding ring?” You asked.

“No, sorry, dear,” she responded. “Haven’t seen one.”

You nodded and walked out. You stared at the area where you and Logan had words just hours before. It had already felt like your whole relationship was slipping through your fingers; now, you didn’t even have your ring. You didn’t have Logan’s dog tags either, having lost them years ago. All you were left with were your memories, but even they were tainted under this haze of darkness that the two of you were experiencing. With a shaky breath, you walked back to your car.

You failed to notice a familiar pair of hazel eyes following you. Logan sat in his limo, parked across the street, as you got back into your car. It didn’t shock him that you had stayed in town. His large, rough right hand opened up to reveal your wedding ring sitting in the palm of it. He maneuvered it to move it from finger to finger as he watched you drive away.

Logan remembered that you had thrown your ring between the two of you after a long night of work. He couldn’t bear the thought of it sitting in the dirt. The ring was too important and symbolized too much. So he grabbed it before anyone else could. Logan pressed the ring to his chest, where burns were still healing from your attack the previous day. This was the first time your burns ever hurt him like this. But he did not hold any blame toward you. You had every right to attack him the way you did. Logan believed he deserved every bit of your anger and hatred.

~~~

That night, you decided to go to the nearby bar. Not to stalk Logan, but to get yourself a drink. You were three drinks in when a man slid into the seat beside you.

“Hey, pretty lady,” his words slurred together. He leaned in closer, allowing you to smell his breath and body odor. “You new in town? I haven’t ever seen you around here.”

“Just passing through,” you muttered, keeping your eyes on your glass as your finger ran circles around the rim.

“Well, wanna pass through my way?”

“I’m…”

The word ‘married’ sat on your tongue, but you couldn’t get yourself to say it. Your eyes shifted over to the finger on your left hand that once proudly carried your ring. Logan had reminded you that you weren’t actually married, so could you really use that as an excuse?

“I’m not interested,” you said instead.

“Come on, sweet cheeks,” he moved closer, placing a hand on your back. “Give me a chance.”

You studied the man out of the corner of your eye. In all honesty, if he didn’t sink and looked a little better, you might have taken him up on the offer. But not tonight. You wanted to be alone.

“I’m good.”

You finished off your drink before throwing some cash down on the bar. You headed out of the bar, trying to ignore the fact that the man was following. Having walked to the bar, you knew that it was too dangerous to head there if the man followed you. You couldn’t get very far out the door anyway before the man grabbed your wrist and pinned you against the wall.

“It’s not kind to walk away like that,” he slurred.

You opened your mouth to say something, but the man was torn off of you before you could.

“Get the fuck away from her,” Logan snarled, glaring down at the man. He was dropping off a bachelorette party when he saw you exit the bar and the man touch you.

There was a time when you would have been grateful for Logan intervening, but now it only made you angry. As Logan scared the man, you walked away, starting down the street like nothing happened.

“Hey!” Logan called, limping after you. “Y/N! Get in the car.”

You continued walking. “I thought you wanted me to walk away? So let me walk away.” He finally caught up with you, catching your wrist and forcing you to turn around. “Let go of me.” You tried to tug your wrist from his grip, but he only tightened it. “I don’t need your help, Logan. I had it handled.”

“Oh, I know you would have set the man on fire, but that’s too risky.”

“I can be subtle.”

Logan scoffed. “Whatever you say, sweetheart. Let’s go.”

“No.” You dug your feet into the ground.

“Yes. I’m dropping you off at the airport. You are leaving.”

“You’re not the boss of me. Hell, you reminded me yesterday that you’re not even my husband. Now let go!”

You heated up your arm, forcing Logan to let go with a groan. Logan stuffed his hand in his pocket quickly so that you weren’t able to see the burn and blisters from your heat.

“Don’t you have a job to do?” You questioned.

“I have time to get you to the airport,” he responded.

“Too bad I’m not going to the airport. I’m going back to my motel.”

“Then let me drive you.”

“Oh, so you can trick me into going to the airport? No thanks. Besides, my motel is right here.”

You turned on your heel and continued walking. Logan followed, not willing to let you walk back alone. You ignored him as you reached your motel and walked to the door of your room. Logan looked around, surveying the motel. It clearly wasn’t the best or even safest. He immediately noticed, as you opened the door, that it didn’t even sit right on its hinges, leaving a gap at the bottom.

“This place isn’t safe,” he murmured.

“I can handle myself,” you retorted. “Besides, I don’t have much money. It’s all I can afford.”

“What about the house?”

The house. The one that sat in the Canadian Rockies that the two of you haven’t visited in almost five years.

“Lost it when the government believed you were keeping Charles there… I’ve been on the streets, figuring it out.”

“What?”

“Don’t be so shocked. Where did you think I’d go? The mansion? Without everyone… it wouldn’t be the same. Besides, there are whispers that the government is after me to get to Charles. I’m not safe anywhere. Except on the run and on the streets.” You glanced back at him, the guilt shining in his eyes. You did what you could to make it worse, not caring how childish it was. “Just another promise you failed to keep…. Or, I guess, you chose to break.”

The scene from fifty-five years ago played out in real-time in Logan’s mind. How he had reached out for your hand, begging you to come with him and promising you a bed, clothes, food, and that you’d never be on the streets. Now, here you were… and Logan had to blame himself.

“Y/N…”

“Just go, Logan. I don’t have the energy to deal with this anymore tonight.”

“You shouldn’t be staying here.”

“Well, where are you staying?” Logan looked away, not willing to answer the question. “That’s what I thought.” You walked over to the door. “Goodnight, Logan.”

Logan didn’t move as you shut the door in his face. He stood there for a moment, fighting with himself on whether or not to take you with him. You didn’t deserve this life you were forced into, but it’s not like the smelting plant he, Charles, and his mutant helper, Caliban, were living in was any better. With a sigh, he left, heading back to the bar and his limousine.

~~~

The next night, you found yourself at the bar again, silently hoping that Logan would make an appearance. When you were finished drinking for the night, you left the bar to find Logan leaning against his limo. You decided against talking to him, instead heading for your motel. Logan silently followed, not ever too far behind. He stopped in the parking lot and watched as you slipped into your motel. He stayed until the lights were off, and then he headed back to the limo. This became the routine for the next eight days.

You were about to run out of money. So, instead of going to the bar for the night, you stayed in to go over your options.

Logan was getting worried. You were an hour late in making your appearance outside the bar. With a huff, he walked in and searched the bar for you. Only to not be able to find you. His heart began pounding as he grew concerned. Logan hopped into his limo and drove over to your motel. He couldn’t help but rush over to your door and knock loudly.

“Y/N! Are you in there?” He worried. With furrowed brows, you went over and opened the door. He felt little relief when he saw you standing there. “You weren’t at the bar.”

“I’ve been busy,” you replied with a shrug, not trying to overthink the fact that he was worried about you.

“Are you okay?”

You debated for a moment on whether or not to tell him the truth. “I’m running out of money. I needed to figure out where it was coming from next.”

Logan hated how fast his heart dropped. He had promised to keep you safe from this life, and he had failed. “How much do you need?”

“I’m not taking your money, Logan. I can figure it out just fine.”

“Just tell me how much.”

“No. You can’t swoop in and save the day… Not when you’re the one who wanted this.”

“Y/N—“

“Goodnight, Logan.”

You slammed the door in his face.

~~~

“I know you’ve seen her,” Charles stated as he watered the plants that sat in the tank that he was never allowed to leave.

“Who?” Logan questioned, pretending to be clueless as he readied Charles’ meds.

“Y/N… I don’t understand why you can’t just bring her here.”

“She’s safer out there.”

“Clearly not.”

“She’s fine.”

“Does the reason that you won’t bring her here have anything to do with the reason we’re here?”

“Charles—“

“Y/N and I deserve the truth.”

“Y/N knows the truth.”

“And I don’t?”

“Here.” Logan shoved the medication into Charles’ hand. “Take. Now.” Charles swallowed the pills down quickly. “Open.”

Charles stuck his tongue out and opened his mouth wide to prove to Logan that he’d taken the pills. Once Logan was done, he headed for the door.

“You are miserable, Logan,” Charles stated, causing the man to pause. “She’s miserable, too… Hell, we all are. But the two of you might as well be miserable together.”

“You don’t understand,” Logan muttered.

“You’re correct, I don’t. I don’t understand how you can watch the person you love suffer like the way Y/N is. If you truly love her, you’d make sure she’s taken care of.”

“Get some sleep, Charles.”

~~~

Logan hated that Charles was right, even when his mind was deteriorating. You were not protected or safe as long as you didn’t have a home. You were the only thing on his mind as he finished an Uber ride and headed to the diner to get some food. He sat down in his usual spot and glanced around. He froze as you walked over to him in a waitress's uniform.

“What are you doing?” He wondered.

“Well, hello to you, too, Logan,” you replied. “I needed money. The diner needed another waitress.”

“So, you’re sticking around?”

“Until a better offer comes around, I plan on being here for a long time.”

~~~

Logan made it a new routine to come to the diner for lunch. Sometimes you were working, sometimes you weren’t. When you were there, the two of you would barely talk outside of him ordering food, which he didn’t have to do since you already knew what he liked. Logan would watch with observant eyes at your every movement and interaction. He knew you better than anyone, and he knew you weren’t okay. But he knew that you could tell the same thing about him. The two of you never handled it well, being apart from each other. But, about two weeks after you started the job, Logan could tell that something was weighing you down.

“What’s wrong?” He quietly asked as you set down his food.

“Nothing,” you responded.

“Y/N.” He grabbed your hand. “Talk to me.”

“Let go of me, Logan.”

“Just tell me.”

“Let go.”

You heated up your skin, burning his hand and forcing him to let go. Logan bit back a pained moan as you spun around to take care of another customer. Logan stood up and limped to the restroom, running your hand under the cold sink water. You noticed as Logan exited the restroom and sat back down. You saw that the hand that he had grabbed you with was resting on his lap, palm up. Slowly, you got closer, eyes never leaving his hand. You gasped as you saw the not-healing burn. Logan’s eyes snapped up at your gasp.

“Did I… Did I hurt you?” You questioned. You had never seen something like this happen to Logan. Every burn you had ever caused him had healed. This wasn’t.

“I’m fine, sweetheart,” Logan told you.

“Oh my gosh… Logan…” You reached down with trembling hands and took his injured hand. “I… I hurt you.”

Logan’s heart cracked as you took the blame for the burn. “It’s not your fault, honey.”

“Yes, it is.” You tugged his arm. “Come with me.”

“Y/N—“

“Come.”

Logan sighed and followed you. You kept a hold of his wrist as you led him through the kitchen and into the small back office. You dropped his wrist before you closed the door and grabbed the first aid kit.

“Sit,” you gently ordered.

Logan didn’t bother fighting, sitting down in the chair. He watched you as you gathered the needed items. You gently took his hand and rested it on the desk. Then you got the burn cream and carefully applied it over the burn. Once it was all covered, you wrapped his hand and pressed a kiss over the wrap. You set Logan’s hand down in his lap before your hands went to his face, holding it delicately. Your thumbs rubbed up against his full gray beard as you studied his face. His wrinkles, his eyes, the tiny scars.

“What’s happening to you, Logan?” You whispered.

Logan’s hands slowly came up to your hips, barely holding you there. “I’m fine, baby.”

“No, you’re not… just tell me what’s wrong… Please.”

Logan’s uninjured hand ran up your side until he was cradling your head in his large palm. He gently guided your head down until your lips were barely not touching. You both closed your eyes as you allowed yourselves to feel the weight of this moment and everything that had happened before this. Logan inhaled sharply when he felt a tear fall to his cheek, and he knew it wasn’t his.

“Please don’t cry, honey,” he quietly begged.

“What’s happened to us?” You cried. “What’s happening?”

As your tears turned into sobs, Logan quickly pulled you into his lap and held you there.

“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he comforted. “I’m here.”

“But you’re not,” you sobbed. Logan could feel his own tears burning in the back of his eyes. “You left… everyone died… and I… I miss you… I miss you so much it hurts… but it doesn’t matter because you’re just gonna tell me to walk away… and maybe this time I will.”

“Don’t.” The word came out before Logan could stop it. “Don’t walk away… please.”

“You’ve hurt me so much.”

“I know, baby, I know. And I will never forgive myself for any of it, and I don’t ever expect your forgiveness. But don’t leave.”

“Then take me to your home, Logan.”

“I can’t do that, honey. It’s too dangerous.”

“I can handle it.”

“I can’t… Charles isn’t stable, and I can’t find you that way again… You were bleeding so much and unresponsive… I won’t let that happen again.”

“Then I guess there’s my choice.” You pulled yourself away from Logan and stood up. “I have to finish my shift.”

You walked out of the office without another word, leaving Logan wondering if this could ever be fixed.

Chapter Text

Logan was anxious as he pulled up to the diner the next day. He couldn’t see your car, which made his stomach tie up in knots. What if you actually walked away? He had kept telling you to, but then yesterday… he couldn’t lose you again. It might actually be the thing that killed him. Logan’s eyes scanned the diner as he entered, trying to find any sight of you.

“Excuse me,” Logan grumbled as he caught the attention of one of the other waitresses. “Is Y/N here?”

“Her shift starts in a few minutes,” the waitress responded. “Feel free to wait in a booth.”

“Thanks.”

Logan sat down at tapped the table as he looked out the window and waited for you. He felt some relief when he watched you pull up and enter the diner. You could feel Logan’s gaze on you, but you ignored it, quickly starting your shift. You didn’t go over there until Logan’s food was finished.

“Here,” you muttered, setting the food down. You kept your gaze down.

“Sweetheart,” Logan’s injured hand came up to your hand.

“I have to work, Logan. If you need something, we can talk after my shift.”

You turned away and went to help a rowdy truck driver at the counter. Logan kept his eyes on you, growing angrier by the second as the truck driver kept trying to put his hands on you.

“Hey, bitch,” the truck driver called, slapping your butt as you walked past.

Logan stood up and walked over, his whole world red. He grabbed the guy’s shirt and immediately punched him in the face.

“Logan!” You exclaimed, trying to pull him off the man. “Stop!”

Logan pulled the man closer to his face. “Don’t you ever disrespect a woman like that!” He then punched the driver again.

“Logan!” You went to grab his arm, but his elbow flew back into your face and hit your nose. Blood began gushing down you. You grabbed your nose to try to plug it.

“That’s enough!” Your manager shouted. She glared at Logan and the driver. “Get out!”

Logan looked back at you, stomach dropping at the sight of blood on you. When did you get hurt? He didn’t remember that at all. Logan let go of the driver, causing the man to fall to the ground.

“Out!” Your manager repeated. Logan left the diner before the manager turned to you. “You’re fired.”

“What?” You questioned. “But I—“

“Keep luring that man in. I can’t ban him; he’s too dangerous, but I can ban you. Go.”

You grabbed your things and went out to your car, where Logan was waiting.

“Y/N,” he whispered, hands stuffed into his pockets to hide his own blood and bruising.

“Go away,” you muttered. You got into your car, slamming the door before driving off.

~~~

Logan dropped off the bachelor party at the bar and sat there in the limo. He knew he lost it today and that you needed an apology. Getting out, he was going to get to your motel when he saw you stumble out of the bar, hanging off of a man. You were giggling and touching the man, making Logan see red again. Without another thought, Logan was storming over there. He ripped the man off of you before you could kiss.

“Hey!” The man exclaimed. “Watch it—“

“Run off,” Logan’s voice was gruff yet thick with anger. He lifted one of his fists and revealed his metal claws. The man scurried off.

“Are you going to sabotage all my jobs now?” You questioned, causing him to turn quickly toward you.

“What? What job?”

“Well, you got me fired from the diner, and I need money. The guy was going to pay well.”

Logan thought he was going to throw up. He had promised you a life away from this, yet here you were because of him. “There has to be another way.”

“What am I supposed to do? I need the money, and I don’t have a safe place… You won’t take me home—to your home… I have nothing.”

“But… you’re my wife,” Logan reached out to you, but you stepped away. “Just ask me, and I’ll help you.”

“I thought you said we weren’t even married, Logan. So, I’m not your wife…”

His heart was shattered. “I didn’t mean—“

“Just… let me walk away, Logan. That’s what you wanted, right?”

Logan felt frozen as you walked in the direction of your motel. He had caused this. It was all his fault. But how could he fix it without putting you in more danger?

~~~

The next morning, Logan woke up with a mission. He had to get to your motel. He had to convince you somehow to stay in town. He was stupid, stupid to think that pushing you away was protecting you. He would work more shifts or get another job just to keep you close. And to make sure that you were taken care of. Logan sped to the motel and rushed up to your door. Knocking on it, the door creaked open.

“Y/N?” He called, stepping inside. “Sweetheart?”

None of your belongings were there. It looked like you left in a rush. Logan ventured further into the room, checking for any sign of you. His eyes caught sight of the motel notepad on the desk, where your familiar handwriting sat. His hand trembled as he picked up the note. He moved it closer to his face and then away as he struggled to read it.

“Fuck,” he muttered, hating how his body was betraying him.

Eventually, he found a spot that he could read it, if he squinted real hard.

Logan—Got kicked out of the motel. Apparently, they don’t enjoy long-term guests like me. I wish things were different.

Logan didn’t even know he was crying until a tear fell on your note. The dog tags and ring that sat against his chest felt like they were burning into him. A part of him wished that they would. That they’d burn right through to his heart. Keeping the note in his hand, Logan turned around and left the motel room. His eyes searched for any sign of your car, but it wasn’t there. You had left, just as he had wanted. But then why did he feel like he could just lay down and die? Like his heart had been ripped from his chest? You were right. This wasn’t protection to either of you. This just made things worse. And it was too late to fix it.

With a heavy sigh, Logan got into his limo and headed back to the smelting plant. He couldn’t work today. Not with his mind too caught up in you and the promises that he failed to keep.

~~~

It was dark, stuffy, and extremely bumpy. But you didn’t care, especially once you realized that Logan kept extra suit jackets and white shirts in the limo’s trunk.

You knew that Logan would stop by; he was so predictable to you. That morning, you sold your stolen car and packed up your belongings. You waited patiently for Logan to show up at the motel and slipped into his trunk as he searched your room. If Logan wasn’t going to take you to where he was living, you’d just have to sneak there. Consequences be damned. You at least deserved a chance actually to say goodbye to Charles and to Logan.

Currently, you were in Logan’s trunk, wrapped up in one of his jackets, savoring the smell of him. It was something you missed. Just his woody, cigar, leathery scent. It was pure Logan.

You didn’t know how long you were in the car before Logan finally stopped and got out. As you waited, you began to grow nervous. What if you showing up like this was the last straw? What if he really didn’t want you?

“Don’t be silly, my dear,” Charles’ voice entered your mind. “Logan always wants you.”

“Charles?” You mentally responded.

“The coast is clear. I’m in the tank.”

You popped open the trunk and carefully slipped out. You shut it, leaving your belongings in there. Glancing around, you took in the abandoned smelting plant and the barely put-together tank next to it. There was a fence surrounding the place with a train track not too far from that. It was in the desert, the heat of the sun beating down on you. Nothing was around for miles.

Tugging the jacket around you tighter, you quietly made your way to the tank. As you came up to the door, your heart sank as you realized that it was locked from the outside, clearly keeping Charles in. You entered and looked around. Charles was sitting in a wheelchair near a hospital bed. There was a chair and a small table with some plants scattered about. A fan was working overtime, trying to cool the thick, hot air. Charles smiled upon seeing you.

“Hello, Y/N,” he greeted.

You smiled back, trying not to worry too much about how it felt like he had aged too much since you last saw him. But the same could probably be said for you. “Hello, Charles.”

“I have missed you.” He wheeled himself over and held out his hand.

You took it. “I’ve missed you, too.”

“Come. Sit.” Charles led you over to the chair. “I know that it’s been a hard year for you.”

“I’m sure it hasn’t been easy for you either.”

“Alzheimer’s… That’s what I have. Seems to be an okay day today. Well, besides being stuck in this shit hole.”

You laughed. It wasn’t very often that you heard Charles swear. “Yeah, the whole place seems… nice.”

“That’s far too kind of a word. But it is better now that you’re here.”

“I don’t know if I can stay.” You shook your head. “I don’t know if Logan wants me here.”

“I don’t care what he wants. I want you here.”

“Charles—“

“Besides, that old grump yearns for you.” He tapped his head. “I know. Well, when I’m not full of those awful meds that they keep giving you.”

“They? Who else is here?”

Just then, the tank door opened, and a man walked in. He was carrying a tray of food and meds. He was tall and thin, all of his skin covered for protection from the sun. You jumped slightly and froze, not expecting anyone else here since Logan had been so adamant that you couldn’t be here for your safety.

“What the— Who are you?” The man asked, closing the door and walking further in. He set the tray down on the table and pulled his goggles up onto his forehead, showing you that he was albino.

“Caliban, this is Y/N,” Charles introduced.

“You’re Y/N.”

“I am,” you responded. “Who are you?”

“Logan found me. Offered me food, shelter, and protection in exchange for helping with Charles.”

“Oh.” You hated how much it stung that Logan would promise someone else that.

“Does he know you’re here?”

“No. I snuck over in the trunk of his limo. Please don’t tell him I’m here. I would like to do that.”

“Of course.”

“Y/N can help me with my meds today, Caliban,” Charles said. “You can go.”

Caliban nodded, stealing one last look at you before sliding his goggles back over his eyes and heading out. You walked over to the tray and brought it over to Charles, resting it across his lap.

“Now, Y/N,” Charles took a bite of his food, “tell me how it felt to beat Logan will some fire.”

~~~

Logan tipped the bottle of alcohol up, the liquid burning down his throat. Due to his dwindling healing abilities, Logan had started to feel the effects of alcohol more than he ever had before. But it did nothing to make him forget about you. Your smokey scent. The way your skin felt under his rough, calloused hands. The warmth that radiated off of you. Your eyes and your smile.

He set the bottle down on the table as Caliban came back into the smelting plant. Logan’s thick brows furrowed as he watched Caliban unwrap his skin.

“Did you make sure he swallowed?” Logan questioned, thinking that Caliban hadn’t been in the tank long enough.

“He swallowed,” Caliban replied.

Logan scoffed. “Why don’t I believe you?”

“Well, it might be because you’re tired.”

Logan groaned as he stood up. “I shouldn’t have to do everything around here.”

“Don’t go out there.”

“Why not?”

“He’s, uh, lucid.”

“And?” Caliban looked away. “I’m going out there. Good thing the sun will prevent you from stopping me.”

Logan marched out of the plant, slamming the door as he headed to the tank. As soon as he opened the door, he froze. You were sitting with Charles.

“Logan!” You exclaimed, surprised to see him already.

“How the hell did you get here?” He grumbled, marching closer. “You disappeared. Everything was gone.”

“I sold the car this morning and snuck into your trunk when you stopped by the hotel.”

“Don’t be mad at her, Logan,” Charles scolded.

“I ain’t mad,” he murmured. “You need to go.”

“No,” you weren’t going to let him push you away this time. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Yes, you are.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you from the chair with his uninjured one. “You can’t be here. Especially not in here.” He began leading you to the door.

“Let go of her, Logan,” ordered Charles.

“It’s okay, Charles,” you replied. “I can handle this.” You shut the door behind you as Logan pulled you outside.

“Get in the car,” Logan demanded.

“No. You don’t get to tell me what to do! You also don’t get to ask me to stay and then not let me be here.”

“It’s too dangerous! Charles is—He is lucid today, but it’s not always like this, and he can control the seizures and the psychic attacks. You could die, just like the others.”

“I’d rather die in your arms than die homeless on the streets.”

Logan let go of your hand and stepped back. His hand ran down his face in frustration—at himself and the situation. He would rather that, too. That he knew your fate than you die in some alley. But he didn’t want you to have to watch him and Charles decline. Logan knew he couldn’t have it both ways.

You could see the war raging in his mind. You stepped closer and gently took his face in your hands. “I also don’t want you to die alone… I know that something is wrong… I’m staying. We can do this your way, but I’m staying.”

“Fine. But you follow my rules.”

~~~

Logan’s rules were stupid in your eyes, but you were willing to follow them, at least for a little while. The biggest rule Logan had was that you were not allowed to go near Charles unless Logan was home. You thought it was ridiculous and told him as such, but he was still insistent anyway. However, perhaps the biggest thing Logan insisted on was that you two had separate bedrooms.

“It’s for your own good,” Logan told you.

You rolled your eyes and scoffed. “Or it’s for your own good. You just don’t want me to figure out what’s wrong with you. So you’re still running and hiding.”

Logan hated how well you knew him. That first night you spent there, neither of you got any sleep. You couldn’t help but think about crawling in bed with Logan, though both of you were stuck with uncomfortable twin beds. There was a time when that wouldn’t have mattered. When you two were stuck with a small sleeping situation, Logan would pull you on top of him, holding you there all night. That’s where you wanted to be. In his arms.

Logan was itching to go to you. To hold you and beg for forgiveness for everything he had done to hurt you. But he couldn’t let himself. Logan needed to keep you at a distance still. He believed it would make it easier when he died from the poison in his body. Though he was sure that you could tell he was already dying.

You, Logan, Charles, and Caliban quickly fell into a routine. Caliban would sleep in the tank every night with Charles. You would make breakfast for the bunch and switch Caliban out so that he could eat and get some more rest. You would stay with Charles, making sure he ate and took his meds until Logan left for work. Logan would always escort you from the tank into the smelting plant before leaving. You took it upon yourself to clean up the smelting plant, trying your best to make it more homey while Caliban took care of Charles. You also took care of lunch and dinners.

Logan would often work late. You made sure that Charles and Caliban ate and went to bed while you waited up for Logan. You had a few books in your belongings, so you would wait on the dingy couch with a book until Logan came home. You would always watch him carefully as he entered and hung up his jacket, trying to hide his pained groans. Logan would hobble over to the table, grabbing the alcohol on his way before you warmed up the food. The two of you would eat in silence.

“Goodnight, Logan,” you would say softly every night after cleaning up.

“Night, sweetheart,” he would mumble as you walked away.

This routine went on for months, barely ever changing. Logan had noticed that Caliban and Charles were doing better with you around. It helped that they had another person to help ease the burdens and talk to. Charles hadn’t had a seizure since before you arrived, with all of you not taking that for granted.

Logan began to realize that you were doing so much to take care of the three of them, but no one was really taking care of you. You deserved more than that.

The first gift he showed up with was a new book. It appeared outside your door one of the rare nights when you had gone to bed before Logan got home.

The next gifts were weeks later and spread out. Logan felt bad that you were stuck in an uncomfortable bed with a flimsy sheet. He knew that your mutation kept you warm, but you still deserved to be comfortable. Each of the gifts was already on your bed when Logan left for work. The first one was new sheets, already fitted against your bed. The next one was a blanket, and then there were new pillows with a whole new mattress as the last one.

You couldn’t understand how Logan was affording these items. You knew that money was tight and felt guilty that he was spending so much on you. The only way you could think to repay him was through your grocery list and the food you made. You knew what meals Logan liked and had them on a constant rotation for him.

Charles and Caliban watched the quiet gifting with much annoyance. They both believed that you should just talk it out.

“Logan is not working today,” Caliban said. “You should talk to him.”

“He’s not the talking type,” you responded, finishing up getting breakfast ready. “Besides… I don’t know if it could help anything now.”

“You never know until you try.”

You ignored the comment as you picked up the tray. “I’ll be out with Charles.”

Caliban sighed as you left, and Logan came down the stairs. Logan grabbed the plate that you had already prepared for him, along with the cup of coffee, and sat at the table.

“She’ll be glad to have you home today,” Caliban commented.

“Sure,” Logan scoffed.

“She misses you.”

“And you would know?”

“I often find her crying as she works.”

That immediately caught Logan’s attention. “What?”

But before Caliban could respond, a high-pitched mental sound rang through their minds. Caliban froze while Logan groaned in pain. Moving as fast as Charles’ seizure would allow, Logan grabbed the medication and fought to get into the tank. He needed to stop Charles and get to you. When he opened the door of the tank, Charles was in bed, seizing, while you had collapsed to the ground. Logan ground his teeth and pushed harder.

Far too long for his liking, Logan reached Charles’ bedside and injected the meds into him. The seizure stopped, and Logan collapsed to his knees with a grunt. He immediately crawled over to you, only to find you bleeding from your nose and ears. It was his worst nightmare come true again. Caliban stumbled into the tank, covered, as Logan swept you into his arms. He stood up with you, not caring how much pain he was in himself.

“Take care of him,” he mumbled as he carried you out of the tank.

Every part of his body and soul ached as he carried you up to your room and tucked you in there. You were still breathing, giving him hope. But the last time you had experienced one of Charles’ seizures, you had been in a coma for months. Logan didn’t know if he would survive that again.

With gentle care, Logan cleaned off your face once you stopped bleeding. He sat in a chair beside your bed, leaning forward with his head down and hands clasped together. You were out for the rest of the day before you finally showed signs of waking up. You moaned as you moved to stretch a little and opened your eyes. Looking over, you saw Logan sitting there, tears streaming down his cheeks. His eyes were red and he wasn’t even bothering to hide the heartbreak.

“You can’t be here,” he whispered.

“Logan—“

“No! You can’t be here. What I was trying to prevent from happening almost happened! You could have died!” He stood up, clenching his fists together, almost like he wished he could physically fight this battle. “I— I can’t— I love you too damn much to lose you like this! I just want you to be alive and safe. And that’s not possible here with Charles… here with me.”

“I have nowhere to go.”

“I know! And it’s all my fucking fault! I broke my promise, and now you’re struggling, and it’s all my fault. I hate myself for putting you in those situations! But I— I can’t have you here and watch Charles kill you like he did all the others…”

“James,” you reached out for his hand, relieved when he let you take it. You could see some of the tension leave his shoulders as you squeezed his hand.

“I can’t live without you, sweetheart.” He plopped back into the chair, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to do this… to be the man I need to be for you and make the right decision.” His grip on your hand tightened. “I need you like I need air to breathe.”

“Then don’t run. Don’t push me away.”

“It’s not safe here… Charles could have killed you today.”

“But he didn’t. And Caliban told me that he’s been more lucid and less prone to seizures. Telling me to leave would make it worse… And then what will happen to you? Who would take care of you?”

“I don’t need you to worry about me, honey.”

“How can I not?” Tears slipped down your cheeks. “I have worried about you every day since I woke up. I masked it with anger because I thought that would help me handle my situation more, but it didn’t… I know you’re dying, James. Whether you want to be honest with yourself or me, that doesn’t matter. I can see it. And… I can’t let you die alone. Please don’t make either of us die alone.”

Logan launched himself at you, wrapping you up in his arms and holding you close. He was full-on sobbing now; the walls that he had put up now crumbled to dust. “I’m so sorry… baby, I’m so sorry…”

Your arms came around to hold him. “Please don’t make me leave…”

“No, no,” Logan shook his head as he pulled back and gently cradled your head in his hands. “You’re not going anywhere… Honey… I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t need to keep apologizing.”

“I will never stop, baby. Until my dying breath. And I never expect your forgiveness for my behavior… for my words.” He reluctantly let you go as he pulled your dog tags out from underneath his shirt.

“My ring,” you gasped as you saw it sitting there.

“I went back and got it,” he explained as he removed it from the chain. “I couldn’t stand the thought of someone else taking it.”

“I thought it was gone… I thought…”

One of Logan’s hands went up to cup your cheek as the other held your ring. “I said things I didn’t mean… I told you that our marriage wasn’t real when it was the most real thing in my entire life. You are my wife. I am your husband. Whether or not it’s on an official document.” He easily slipped the ring on your finger, eyes boring into yours. “You are my wife.” He moved his hands to your neck before he kissed your cheek. “You are my wife.” He then kissed your other cheek. You were growing hotter as his beard scratched your skin in a different way than you were used to. “I am your husband.” He kissed your nose. “You are my wife.” Then his lips finally crashed onto yours.

You pulled Logan closer as he fought for dominance in your mouth. Slowly, you lay down, forcing Logan to get on top of you. Logan never broke the kiss, taking you in like a starving man. His hands moved to slide under your shirt, feeling your heated skin. He groaned as he pulled his hands away, and his lips left yours.

“I’m sorry,” you panted. “I’m just… It’s been too long.”

“I know, honey,” he rasped. “I’m feeling the same way.”

“I can try to cool down—“

“Don’t. I can handle it.” He kissed you again. “Let me try to make amends.”

Chapter Text

“The adamantium is poisoning me,” Logan admitted as he held you tightly against him. The two of you were cuddled up in your bed, cleaned up, and clothed after the make-up sex the two of you shared.

“What?” You moved to sit up slightly, looking down at his face.

“My adamantium skeleton is what’s killing me.”

“And it’s causing you pain?”

“Yes.”

“And your healing abilities, they’ve—“

“They’re still there, just much slower and leaving scars.”

“Like mine.”

“I think yours are better at this point, sweetheart.” You closed your eyes as you tried not to cry. Logan’s hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb rubbing up against your skin. “Don’t cry, honey. You know I can’t stand that.”

“There has to be something someone can do—that I can do— to help you.”

“There’s nothing, baby.”

“Where does it hurt right now?”

“Sweetheart—“

“Tell me.”

Logan sighed. “My wrists.”

You took the hand he had on your cheek and kissed the inside of his wrist before grabbing his other hand and doing the same thing. “Where else?”

“My shoulders.”

Logan’s shoulders were easy to access since he was wearing one of his white tank tops. You pressed kisses around his shoulder closest to you before moving to the next one. Then you warmed up your hands, not too much to burn him, and placed a hand on each of his shoulders. Logan let a relieved moan slip from his lips as he closed his eyes. You pressed a kiss to his bearded jaw as you continued to try to ease some of his pain like you were his personal heating pad.

“Stop,” he eventually groaned.

You quickly removed your hands and sat up. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, no,” his hands ran down your arms, “never. It’s just… I’m supposed to be making amends. You shouldn’t be taking care of me like this.”

“James.” You shot him a brief glare. “This is you making amends by letting me take care of you.”

“But I need to be taking care of you like I’ve failed to do.”

“You are. This bed. Me staying here. How hard you are constantly working. You are taking care of me. But you need to let me take care of you, too.” You ran a hand through his hair, beginning to warmly massage his scalp. “No more sleeping alone. No more secrets, even if you’re trying to protect me.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

You sighed. “I hate it when you say that.” You moved to straddle Logan, careful not to put too much weight on his body. His hands held your hips as your hands came up to his face. “You deserve good things, Logan. You are not a bad person or an animal.”

“I—“

You placed a hand over his mouth. “No. You are good. You deserve good. You deserve me.” You began tearing up, hating when Logan got this way. You just wanted him to believe you. “I love you, James.”

“I know, I know,” he reached up and cupped your face, thumbs wiping the stray tears. “I’m sorry. I love you, too, sweetheart.”

“Tell me.”

“What?”

“Tell me what you deserve. You need to start believing it.”

Logan sighed. “I am good… I deserve good… I deserve you.” He pulled you down and kissed you softly. “Thank you.”

~~~

Logan and you went down for breakfast together, holding hands. Caliban was already in the kitchen, readying some food.

“Not that I’m unhappy the two of you have made up,” Caliban started, “but next time, I would appreciate it if you weren’t so loud.”

“Thought you were out in the tank,” Logan grumbled.

“I was.”

“Then wear some earplugs next time.”

“Be nice,” you chided, patting Logan’s arm. “Sorry, Caliban.”

“Thank you,” Caliban responded. “Breakfast is free game. I’m going to eat with Charles. Give you two some more time alone.”

“Thanks.” You elbowed Logan as he reached for a pancake.

“Ow,” he grunted, looking at you with a confused expression. “What?”

“Say thank you.”

Logan sighed, “Thank you.”

Caliban took the tray as he shook his head, and headed out to Charles. Logan wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his side before kissing your head.

“Got to work today,” he said.

You rested your head on him and sighed. “Okay… I’ll miss you.”

“Good,” he smirked. “I’ll be late because I have to pick up Charles’ meds.”

“If I give you a list, can you run to the store for groceries?”

“Sure.”

~~~

“I love you,” Logan whispered against your lips before stealing a kiss.

“I love you, too,” you replied. “Be safe. I’ll have dinner ready for you whenever you get home.”

“You don’t need to wait up.”

“But I want to… I don’t sleep well without you.”

“Try for me, sweetheart. I’ll wake you up when I get home.” He pressed another kiss to your lips. “I promise.”

“If you don’t, I’ll burn you to a crisp.”

Logan chuckled. “I don’t doubt it, honey.”

He kissed your forehead before walking to the limo. You leaned against the doorway, wrapped up in one of his flannels, and watched him drive away. You hated how far away Logan had to drive for work, but you understood why he needed to keep Charles away from others.

~~~

Logan was exhausted. It was well past midnight as he pulled up to the smelting plant. He was later than he had hoped, but he had to argue to get Charles’ meds. Limping into the plant with arms full of groceries, Logan tried to be as quiet as possible. The small TV was playing quietly in the makeshift living room, providing the only light. The changing scenes increased the light on your sleeping figure on the couch.

Logan smiled softly, shaking his head. He made quick work of putting the groceries away and getting Charles’ meds ready for the next day before he carefully came over to you. He crotched down beside the couch to get a good look at your relaxed features.

“I missed this,” he whispered, mostly to himself. “I missed coming home to you.”

Biting down a groan, Logan swept you into his arms and headed up the stairs to your room. It wasn’t until he set you down in your bed that you started to wake.

“Logan?” You whimpered as he pulled away.

He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Go back to sleep,” he whispered. “I’m gonna clean up and be right back.”

“Okay…”

As quickly as Logan’s failing body allowed him to, he had showered and changed before coming back to you. You were back asleep. He carefully picked you back up and laid down before placing you on top of him. It wasn’t easy on Logan’s joints to sleep with you on top of him, and he knew there would be long-term effects if he continued, but he had to. Sleeping without you anymore wasn’t an option for either of you. Maybe he could scrape enough money for a larger bed. Perhaps for your birthday. But you would hate him for spending money on you like that. You deserved it, though; you deserved a life much better than this. A life that you two once shared.

~~~

The months following were not easy, and you and Logan still struggled, but it was better. The two of you would fight but quickly work it out. There was no going to be angry.

Charles was gradually getting worse. Logan would still only allow you to visit Charles when he was there. It was frustrating, but when you experienced each of his seizures, you understood more and more.

You noticed that Logan was getting worse, too. It was heartbreaking to see the man you love struggling, and you couldn’t do much about it.

One day, you noticed that Logan had reading glasses in his pocket. You kept an eye on him, seeing if he would ever use them, though you knew he needed to. It was a few days later when you caught him trying to read a newspaper without them. He kept grunting as he squinted his eyes and moved the paper back and forth. You sighed, shaking your head at his stubbornness. You went and took the glasses from his jacket pocket. Quietly, you came up behind him and leaned over, slipping the glasses onto his face.

“Hey!” He protested.

“Use them,” you told him, pressing a kiss to his head.

“Don’t need them.”

You laughed. “Yes, you do.”

“Don’t you think they make me look… ancient?”

You sat down in the chair next to Logan and guided his head to look at you. “I think they’re sexy.”

Logan scoffed. “Sexy? Really?”

“Honey, anything that helps you is sexy to me.” You leaned forward and pecked his lips. “Use them. Stop being stubborn.”

“As you wish, sweetheart.”

~~~

Months later, you noticed Logan struggling more and more. He had a bigger limp and a cough now. His hair was grayer and there were more wrinkles. But he was still your Logan, your love.

“It’s nice to see you and Logan back together,” Charles said as you brought him his breakfast one morning, “where you belong.”

“Yeah,” you sighed. “I just wish I could do more to help ease his pain.”

“You’re doing enough, my dear. You’re doing enough to ease all of our pains.”

You kissed the top of Charles’ head. “I’ve got to go before Logan drags me out of here.”

“Maybe one day you can stay longer.”

“Maybe… See you later, Charles.”

Logan was waiting for you outside the tank, ready to go to work. “How is he today?” He asked, placing his hands on your hips and pulling you into him.

“Sort of there.”

“And how are you?”

“Tired.”

“Get some rest today, then, baby.”

“Can’t you just stay home today?”

“Can’t. We need the money.”

“Yeah…” you nodded, looking down.

“Hey,” Logan’s fingers hooked under your chin and gently pushed your face up. “What else is going on?”

“I just… I’m worried… Something is coming. I—I can feel it.”

“You’re safe.”

“Maybe I’m not. Maybe we’re all not safe.”

Logan sighed, glancing at the time on his watch. “I’ve got to go, but we’ll talk more about this when I come home.” He softly kissed you. “I love you, darlin’.”

“Love you, too.”

~~~

Logan knew he should have gone home, but he was tired and needed a few more jobs tonight. He decided to get some alcohol and take a nap in the back of the limo. He woke up to a group of men trying to steal the limo’s tires. Logan was forced to fight them off with his claws, getting shot multiple times.

After killing three of them, the rest drove off. Logan got back into the limo and drove to a nearby gas station. He was thankful that he kept extra clothes in the trunk, just in case. Leaning over the sink, Logan grunted and groaned as the blood hit the porcelain and the bullets slowly and painfully forced their way out of him.

Logan thought of you as he stood there. He knew that you would want to know what happened, but he was scared too worry you too much. He knew you already were worried. But, needing to hear your voice as he cleaned up, he called you.

“Hello?” Your sleepy voice filled the bloody gas station bathroom.

“Hey, baby,” Logan breathed out, trying to keep the pain from you.

“What’s wrong? Wait— Logan, it’s late. Why aren’t you home?”

“Just needed to pick up a few more jobs tonight.”

“Okay… but why does it sound like you’re in pain?”

Logan sighed. He should have known better than trying to hide this from you. “I’m fine, sweetheart. Just had to fight off some thieves.”

“Logan—“

“Needed to hear your voice.”

“Then come home. Rest. We can worry about money in the morning. Let me take care of you.”

“I’m fine, darlin’. I’ll be home in the morning.”

“Logan—“

“Sorry for waking you up. Go back to sleep. Love you.”

He hung up before you could get another word in.

~~~

Logan picked up three more jobs. One was a morning funeral, where he had been recognized as the Wolverine by a woman who insisted she needed his help. After avoiding her, Logan went to the hospital and grabbed the needed drugs for Charles.

He got into his limo, only for a man to enter through the back. Logan turned around, ready to yell at the man.

“As I live and breathe, the Wolverine,” the man commented. “And he’s a junkie now.”

“Who the fuck are you?” Logan asked.

“You know, you got some buckshot in your door. I heard you was in Phoenix. But then, last night, some friends of mine in Texas HP called and told me they found three dead cholos in a pullout on 54. Not unusual, I know. Except one was missing a hand, another one a leg. So they was thinking it was either an escaped tiger or Freddy Krueger. But neither one of them can drive, one being fictional, the other one extinct. And since the wheel lugs they found belonged to a ’24 Chrysler and, well, this is a ’24 Chrysler… She found you yet?”

“Who?”

“Well, I guess there’s two of them… your girl and Gabriela.” Logan tensed at the mention of you. “Y/N’s been off our radar for a while now, but we know it’s only a matter of time before she finds you. Though, she’s not our main priority. See… I’m not looking for you, Wolvie, or your girl—well, anymore. I’m looking for someone who’s looking for you. She took something of mine when I wasn’t looking. Something for which I am responsible. Mexican lady. Has her sights on you now. Doesn’t ring any bells?”

“I don’t know any Gabriela, so get the fuck out of my car.”

“Oh. You know…” The man moved closer. “I know what you’re hiding, amigo. The old cue ball south of the border.”

“What do you want?”

“A little cooperation.” He handed Logan a business card. Logan made no move to grab it, forcing the man to toss it at him. “I’m a fan, by the way.”

The man left the car, and Logan picked up the business card. The business name was eerily familiar: Alkali Transigen. The man’s name was Donald Pierce, and he was apparently head of security. Logan’s stomach dropped, knowing that this wasn’t a good thing.

“Fuck,” he muttered. “Fuck!”

~~~

Logan didn’t return home the next morning, nor did he return your calls. You were growing concerned.

“We’re out of meds,” Caliban told you after he brought Charles lunch. “Logan was supposed to be back with them. He’s not having a good day.”

“Something’s wrong,” you said. “He won’t answer my calls either.”

You tried to get your mind off of everything by doing the laundry. Only, you found an adamantium bullet in Logan’s pocket. That broke your heart and made you angry at the same time.

You walked out of the plant and began pacing, feeling your skin heat up. If Logan didn’t return soon, you would have to find a way to get Charles’ meds without a vehicle. You would also need to find out where Logan went and confront him about the bullet. The familiar sound of the limo and the gate opening caught your attention. Logan pulled up, and you bulleted to the limo, launching yourself at Logan before he could fully stand up.

“Hey,” Logan coughed as you gripped him tightly. “What’s going—“

“You don’t get to do that!” You shouted, pulling back and shoving him against the limo. “You don’t get to call when things aren’t okay and then drop off the face of the earth!”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I… I’ve been working.”

“You still had time to call me back. Even just to say that you were still alive! You’re so frustrating, you know?”

“Honey—“

“And this!” You pulled out the adamantium bullet. “Found this while doing the laundry. Are you planning on blowing your brains out? At one point, only your memory would die with this, but now… this could actually kill you, Logan! Why the hell wouldn’t you tell me that this was your plan? What happened to not leaving me?”

“I don’t really have a choice, sweetheart. I’m dying.”

“But you’re not even fighting to stay anymore! I thought… I thought that I mattered to you.”

“You are everything to me, baby. But this is something neither of us can fight.”

“Just… go. Go inside. Charles needs his meds. He had a seizure this morning… And I need to cool down.”

“Y/N…”

But you walked off faster than he could catch up to you.

~~~

When you finally decided to go inside, you found Logan in his room. The door was cracked open, allowing you to lean against the doorframe and peek in. Logan was sitting on the edge of his bed. He had a variety of alcohol in front of him with one of the bottles opened. His right hand had his claws out, only they weren’t all the way out. They were stuck. He was grunting in pain as he pulled at one of the stuck claws, trying to get it out.

You quickly entered and knelt in front of him. Glancing up at him, you could tell that he was ashamed. You took his hand from his claw and set it to the side before taking the hand with his claws out. Warming up your hands, you carefully used them to try to ease the pain.

“You don’t have to do this, sweetheart,” Logan grumbled. “I can take care of myself.”

“Clearly, you can’t,” you responded.

As you took care of his hand, the stuck claws slowly pushed out to their normal length. You carefully kissed the tip of each of them before kissing Logan’s knuckles, noticing the puss now oozing from where the claws were pushing out. Both of his hands were now trembling, making your heart break further for him.

“I don’t want you to remember me like this,” he quietly admitted, a tear rolling down his cheek. “Weak… pathetic…”

“You are neither of those things, Logan,” you told him. You cupped his face as you stayed knelt between his legs.

“I should have told you about the bullet.”

“You should have.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

“And I’ll call you back next time.”

“You better.”

Logan sighed, feeling the pain settle in him. “Can we lie down in your bed?”

Without a verbal response, you stood up and took Logan’s hands. You guided him over to your room and allowed him to lie down first. You warmed your body up as you moved yourself behind him, spooning him. He sighed, relaxing into you.

“Relax, honey,” you whispered, pressing a kiss to his neck. “I’ve got you.”

Chapter Text

You and Logan fell asleep with your arms around him. He was the first to wake. He slipped from your arms and kissed your head before getting changed and heading out to work. Logan knew that you hated it when he left without a proper goodbye, but you deserved rest after worrying over him all day.

After driving a bachelorette party to a club, Logan got a notification to head to a motel to pick up a ride. There, he ran into the same woman who found him at the funeral. She had a little girl with her, and the woman, Gabriela, was begging for Logan to take them to Canada. She even offered thousands of dollars in order to protect the girl. He told them he needed to talk to someone before he made a decision and headed back to you.

Logan found you in the living area, ironing his shirts.

“Hey,” you greeted as he came up and wrapped his arms around you.

“Hey,” he kissed your neck.

“You didn’t wake me up for a goodbye.”

“You needed your sleep.”

“So did you.”

Logan held you as you worked for a few quiet moments. “I gotta go away for a few days.”

You stopped ironing. “What?”

“I got a long ride for some good money. But when I get back, we’re getting outta here. All of us. We’re gonna drive down to Yelapa. We’re gonna get ourselves a boat. And we’re gonna go live on the ocean.”

“Who are you taking?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Is this ride safe?”

“Yeah.”

“Why don’t I believe you?” You pulled out of his arms, took the ironed shirts, and walked upstairs.

“Y/N, sweetheart.” Logan sighed as he followed you up the stairs.

“It’s fine, Logan. Leave. Take the ride.”

“It’s safer here for you… Someone… Someone admitted to looking for you.”

“What? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m handling it.”

“Handling it? And if you die handling it, where would that leave me?”

“I’m fine, baby. If I do this ride, it will be safer for all of us.”

You scoffed. “Sure… Maybe I should come with you.”

“Not a chance in hell.”

“I can handle myself, Logan.”

“That’s not the problem.” His phone buzzed. He pulled it out to see a message from Gabriela to hurry. “I’ve got to go.” He limped over to you and tried to kiss you, only for you to turn away. “Please, honey, don’t let me leave like this.”

“Go, Logan. Come back safe.”

Logan’s sad eyes watched as you shut yourself into the bathroom. He went to leave but decided he couldn’t leave like this. He marched over to the bathroom and whipped the door open, causing you to jump. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into him before smashing his lips against yours. You melted into the fierce kiss, arms going to his neck. When the two of you finally broke the kiss, Logan rested his forehead against yours.

“I love you,” he breathed out.

“I love you, too,” you responded. “Come home to me.”

“Always.” He gave you one last kiss before heading off.

~~~

When Logan arrived back at the motel, he found Gabriela’s room door ajar with her body sitting up in a chair. Blood was everywhere, and it was clear that she had been tortured. The little girl that had been with her was nowhere in sight. Logan searched where Gabriela had pulled out the money from, only to find her phone. He took it with him to prevent others from getting his number.

Logan was furious as he drove back to the smelting plant. It had been a waste of time and too dangerous for him to even think about accepting this ride. Now, the money was lost, and you all were still in danger. Caliban was outside as Logan pulled up and limped for the door to inside the plant.

“Logan,” Caliban called.

“Yeah?” Logan coughed.

“What happened? Did something go wrong?”

“This job was wrong to begin with.”

Logan stormed inside, searching the makeshift kitchen for alcohol. You heard him and came rushing down the stairs.

“Logan?” You questioned. “What’s wrong?”

“Logan!” Caliban shouted from outside. “Logan!”

“Oh my—Fuck,” Logan muttered, going back to the door with you following. “What?”

Caliban was standing at the open trunk of the limo, holding a green backpack and a kid’s toy ball. “Who does this belong to?”

Logan and you went over. Logan grabbed the backpack and the ball before looking around the area.

“Logan,” the fear in your voice caught Logan’s attention immediately. You were looking at the open gate, staring at a truck driving in. “Who’s that?”

“Y/N, get inside,” Logan’s voice tried to remain calm and demanding.

“Logan—“

“Get the fuck inside!”

You rushed back inside, on high alert. Caliban followed not too long later.

“We need to get to Charles,” Caliban said. “Keep him quiet.”

You nodded, and the two of you headed out to the tank. When you unlocked the door, Charles was already right there, pushing you aside with his wheelchair.

“Charles? What are you doing?” You questioned, grabbing the handles of the chair to stop him.

“The young mutant,” he answered. “The one that I’ve been talking to. She’s here.”

“What?” You looked at Caliban for an explanation.

Caliban sighed. “Charles has told me he’s been communicating with someone. Logan told me not to tell you.”

“I’ve got to get to her before Logan does something,” Charles continued.

You let go of his wheelchair but followed after him. He went through your makeshift house and out the door that Logan was near. You were right behind him, allowing you to see Logan still standing by the limo with a man unconscious on the ground and a little girl not too far from the scene.

“Logan. Logan!” Charles called, stopping the old man from throwing a piece of pipe. “This is Laura. Caliban, come!” Caliban joined the rest of you. “This is who I’ve been telling you about. This is Laura. We’ve been waiting for you. Come.”

Laura slowly headed towards Charles before turning back to Logan. She marched over and ripped the backpack from Logan’s grasp before walking towards you, Charles, and Caliban.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Charles said. “Come. Come.”

Charles guided Laura inside while you looked at Logan, confused. Logan moved his head, urging you to go inside. With a huff, you turned and headed inside. Charles was pulling out cereal and milk for Laura.

“She’s hungry,” he told you.

“I can handle this,” you said, shooting him a smile. “Just… talk to our guest.”

Charles sat by Laura, who was now at the table, and the two had mental conversations. You grabbed a bowl and spoon before putting together the cereal and setting it in front of Laura.

“Here you go,” you said softly.

Laura nodded before lifting up the spoon and digging in. Logan came in alone, leaving you to assume that he sent Caliban to take care of the man. Logan reached out for the girl’s backpack, only for Laura to quickly grab it.

“Logan,” Charles scolded.

“Hey!” Logan exclaimed as he and Laura tugged the bag back and forth.

“Logan!”

“Hey! You’ll get it back after I figure out what you and your mother have got us into.”

“No, Logan.”

“What?”

“I think the—” Logan dropped the bag and Laura placed it in her lap before going back to eating. “Logan, the woman that you met, that’s not her mother.”

“So she talks?”

“We’re communicating.”

“Communicating,” Logan scoffed. He went over and grabbed Charles’ meds. “Take these now.”

“Logan,” you tried, “maybe Charles needs to—“

“He’s taking the damn pills!”

Charles shot you a thankful look before swallowing the pills.

“We have to get out of here,” Logan continued. “It’s not safe here anymore. And we can’t afford to have an attack out there.”

“Yes, but this is the mutant that I told you about,” Charles said. “She needs our help.”

“She’s not a mutant.”

“Yes, she is!”

“What’s her gift, Charles? Eating? Pipe throwing? We need to pack up.”

Logan stormed off upstairs. You quietly followed after him, finding him in your room, stuffing your clothes into a bag.

“Logan,” you whispered.

“I need to get you out of here,” he murmured, focused on his task. “That man—His company… They’re after Charles. They’re after that… girl… They… They’re after you.”

“I can fight, Logan.”

“You shouldn’t have to.”

You sighed, coming into the room more. “Why didn’t you tell me that Charles was speaking to someone? Why didn’t you let Caliban tell me?”

“Didn’t want to get your hopes up…”

“And why would it have done that?”

“I didn’t know who he was talking to. Didn’t know if it was a new mutant or…”

“Or one of our friends.”

“I thought he’d lost his mind.”

“In a way, he has… Logan, are we taking Laura with us?” Logan looked away; you could tell he was torn. “We can’t just leave her here.”

“She makes it more dangerous.”

“So does Charles, and, apparently, so do I.” You walked over to Logan and gently held his face between your hands. “We can’t leave her.” Logan’s hands snaked around your waist and pulled you closer. “We can get her to where she needs to go. She was part of the job you were going to take, right?” Logan nodded. “Then we complete the job and find a new home.”

Logan sighed, leaning so his forehead met yours. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

~~~

While you finished packing a few items, Logan went outside and began filling the trunk. Dust moving in the distance caught his eye. Rows of cars were speeding towards the smelting plant. He ran back inside.

“We gotta go,” Logan said, taking Charles’ wheelchair by the handles.

“What?” Charles questioned as Logan pushed him away. “What’s going on? Where?”

“Laura,” you crouched down in front of the girl, “we’re going to go. Grab your things and come with me.”

You held out your hand and were grateful when she took it. She grabbed her backpack with her free hand, and you led her out to the car. Logan already had Charles in the car, and the wheelchair stuffed away. But it was basically too late. The trucks slammed into the gate, breaking it open, and quickly surrounded the limo. With a flick of your wrist, you had a circle of fire surrounding the limo.

“Woah,” you heard Laura gasp as her hand tightened its grip on yours.

You couldn’t help but smirk at Laura’s reaction. The trucks stopped outside the circle of fire, and men filtered out, guns raised.

“Logan,” the same man as before greeted. The one Caliban had left to take care of. Your stomach felt like it was tied up in knots. “Huh.” The man’s gaze went from Logan to you to Laura to Charles, whose window was rolled down. “Charles Xavier.”

“Where’s Caliban?” Logan growled.

“American’s most wanted octogenarian,” the man ignored Logan.

“I’m a nonagenarian, actually,” Charles retorted.

“Where’s Caliban?” Logan repeated.

“Why don’t you hand over the girl first?” The man offered. “Both of them.”

Logan placed himself between you, Laura, and the man, though the fire was still a barrier. “Where’s Caliban?”

“Well, I left him in the same ditch he was gonna leave me in.”

Logan growled, clenching his fists as the claws threatened to release. “Y/N, get in the car.”

“Get ‘em, boys!”

The men began firing through the ring of flames. You let go of Laura’s hand and threw your arms out, using your abilities to strengthen the flames. Logan released his claws and used them to block the bullets heading for you and Charles. You failed to realize men going around to the back and getting on the smelting plant. You gasped as the bullet cut through your abdomen and had you falling forward, and the flames protecting you all disappeared.

Laura screamed out in anger as Logan turned around to see you bleeding on the ground.

“Y/N!” He roared as men began swarming.

Laura let out a yell as two claws appeared in each of her fists. You gasped at the sight.

“Holy shit,” Logan muttered.

Laura began defending you as your body tried to heal itself. Logan fought to get to the two of you. You rolled onto your back. You could feel that the bullet was inside of you, meaning that you couldn’t heal properly until it was out. Laura ran back inside the smelting plant, causing all the men to rush after her. Logan limped over, collapsing at your side.

“Honey, sweetheart,” his hands trembled as he looked over you.

“Logan,” you rasped. “Get Laura… we can’t leave her.”

“Not until you're safe. Come on.” He groaned as he lifted you up. He carried you to the limo and slipped you into the back with Charles. “Stay put.”

Logan shut the door and rushed off. You were panting as the pain continued. Your hand was pressed against your wound, trying to slow the bleeding.

“We need to get that bullet out,” Charles stated.

“I know,” you grumbled. “I need Logan… or, I guess, Laura. Someone who can get it.”

The door beside Charles whipped open, revealing one of the men with a gun. You threw your arm out and blasted him back with a large ball of fire. Logan ran past, slamming the door before getting into the driver’s seat.

“As I told you, Logan, she’s a mutant like you,” Charles said with a small smirk.

“Hold on!” Logan shouted.

Logan started the limo and sped off towards the back of the smelting plant. Laura was there, finishing off some of the men. You and Charles flew around the back as Logan slammed on the brakes, allowing Laura to jump onto the hood of the car. Logan drove away while Laura got onto the roof and slipped inside through the sunroof. The men continued after the limo, shooting at it. Laura got on top of Charles, protecting him from the oncoming fire, only to get shot herself.

“Laura!” You exclaimed.

Laura rolled back over to you. She lifted her arm, where the bullet sat, and bit the bullet out. She spit it away as you watched how she healed. Logan kept driving, aiming right for the fence.

“Hold on!” He shouted.

Charles held onto the door while Laura grabbed you. The limo hit the fence but got stuck before the fence could completely break.

“Come on!” He grunted.

You opened up the closest window and pushed out your hand.

“No!” Laura exclaimed, trying to pull your arm back in.

“It’s okay,” you told her. “Watch.”

You shot fire from your palm, aiming at the fence. The metal quickly melted where you were aiming, allowing Logan to drive through the fence as trucks headed for the limo. As soon as your arm was back in the limo, Laura was rolling the window up.

Logan sped the limo up as a train headed down the tracks he was heading toward. Two motorcycles came up, one on each of the sides of the limo. Laura took care of one with her claws while you took care of the other with a ball of fire. Logan cut in front of the long train before the trucks could catch up, barely not losing the back of the limo. Logan stopped the limo for a brief moment, staring down the man on the other side with the trucks. Laura moved up to peer over Logan’s shoulder. Logan pushed her back.

“Sit back,” he told her before driving away. Logan glanced back in the mirror. “Y/N, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Logan,” you panted. “Just need to get this bullet out sooner than later.”

Logan gave a nod, clutching the steering wheel harder. He looked at Laura in the rearview mirror. “You.” She glanced at him. “Who the hell are you?” Laura silently moved to sit beside you. “Hey! I asked you a question. Who are you?”

“You know who she is, Logan,” Charles replied.

“No, I don’t.”

“Does she remind you of anybody?”

You wished you had the strength to go up there and comfort Logan. You could tell that he was panicking on multiple levels, especially about Laura. Before you could summon any strength, Laura had forced you to lie down and placed your head on her lap. You were asleep before you knew what happened.

Chapter Text

Logan stopped at a gas station as soon as he believed he had put a safe distance between the group and the smelting plant. Logan got out of the driver’s seat and got into the back of the limo. He was relieved to see that you were sound asleep, still breathing. He reached to take you from Laura, who was still caring for you, but she held tight and growled.

“That’s my wife you have your paws on, kid,” Logan retorted. “I’ve got to get that bullet out of her before—“

“Laura already took the bullet out,” Charles responded.

“What? When?”

“While you were driving.”

“Still.” He reached over to try to grab you again. Laura shook her head as she kept you near. “Damn it, kid!”

“It’s okay, Laura. He’s going to take care of her. He takes good care of us.”

Charles shot Logan a soft smile, knowing that Logan had truly done so much to take care of everyone. Laura slowly released her grip, allowing Logan to pull you into him. He could hear the beat of your heart, allowing him to relax a bit.

“Logan, we need to talk,” Charles said after a moment. “Maybe you could give Laura some change for the mechanical horse.”

“Fine.” Logan pressed a kiss to your head before gently laying you back down. “Come on, kid.”

Laura glanced at Charles, who gave an encouraging smile and nod before she followed Logan out of the limo. Logan led her to the mechanical horse and inserted a few coins, allowing her to ride it.

“Stay put,” he ordered before heading back to the limo. “Come on, sweetheart,” Logan whispered as he knelt beside you in the back of the limo. “Wake up.”

“Logan?” You rasped, blinking.

“I’m right here… you had me scared there for a moment.”

“What—What happened?” You glanced down to see that your wound was healed, leaving behind a scar.

“Laura took out the bullet when you fell asleep.”

“Where is she?” You groaned as you sat up.

“You need to lie back down.”

“Logan. I’m fine. Where’s Laura?”

“She’s on the mechanical horse outside,” Charles responded.

“Is she okay?”

“She’s not my biggest concern at the moment,” Logan muttered, eyes still scanning you for more injuries.

“She should be,” Charles said. “Did you get any information from the woman she was with?”

“I got the woman’s phone.”

Logan pulled it out of his pocket, surprised it at stayed there after the fight. He opened it up to see a video already pulled up. You sat up, leaning into Logan.

“You need your glasses,” you told him.

“Shit,” Logan muttered as he reached into the front and grabbed his glasses. He slipped them over his nose and looked at you over them. “Better?”

“Much.” You leaned in and kissed his cheek. Then Logan pressed play.

“My name is Gabriela Lopez,” the woman on the screen introduced. “I’m a nurse. And for ten years, I worked for Transigen Research in Mexico City. Transigen is owned by an American company. What I am about to show you is illegal in the U.S. and Canada. They told us we were part of a pharmaceutical study. But, of course, that was a lie. These children were born in Transigen. They were born here, and have never left. They have never seen the sun or the ocean, rain or snow or any of God’s creatures. They have no birth certificates. No names, besides the ones we have given them. They were raised in the bellies of Mexican girls. Girls no one can find anymore. Their fathers are semillas geneticas, special seeds in bottles. We do not dress them up for Halloween. We do not call them ‘baby’ or kiss boo-boos. Don’t think of them as children. Think of them as things with patents and copyrights. They thought we were too poor and stupid to understand. We’re poor, yes, but we are not stupid. This is business. They are making soldiers. Killers. These are babies of mutants—“

As the woman spoke, the video showed different clips from the facility. The children of different ages and mutations. The children being trained and fighting. It broke your heart to see all of this. Laura came up in the video a few times, breaking your heart even further. The phone died before the video finished. Logan tore off his glasses and looked at Laura.

“North Dakota,” Charles stated.

“Mmm?” Logan hummed.

“You took that woman’s money. You said you would take the child there.”

Logan kept his eyes on Laura, watching her grow angry as the machine stopped. “What is she?”

“She’s your daughter, Logan.”

“Alkali…” You whispered. “Alkali has your genetic code.”

Logan’s worried gaze met yours. “Not just mine,” he said. He went to the door and opened it.

“Logan,” Charles called.

“I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t wanna hear about it anymore.”

“Logan.”

“Just stop!”

“I have to pee.”

Logan huffed before grabbing the wheelchair out of the trunk and helping Charles into it. You got out and leaned against the limo, watching everything unfold. Laura was growing angrier at the machine as it refused to move more. She let her claws out of one fist and went to slam it into the controls, but Logan caught her wrist. Logan finished another quarter from his pocket and held it up.

“Last ride,” he told her.

Logan placed the coin in the insert, causing the mechanical horse to begin moving again. Logan and Laura glared each other down for a moment.

“You’re welcome,” Logan said before limping away to help Charles.

You shook your head, already exhausted from just watching Laura and Logan interact. Pushing yourself off of the limo, you came over to Laura.

“When the ride’s over, you want to go in and get some snacks?” You asked her.

Laura nodded. When the ride was done, Laura took your hand and you led her inside.

“You can get whatever you want,” you said. “Don’t worry about what Logan may tell you.”

You walked around with Laura as she grabbed chips and a drink. Looking out the windows, you realized that Logan wasn’t back yet.

“I’ll go grab some money,” you told Laura. “Stay put.”

You went back to the limo, only to hear Logan shout back at the store.

“Not okay!” He was holding Laura’s wrist, whose claws were out. He dragged her out of the store. “Come on. Get in the car.”

“What happened?” You asked.

“She just tried to kill the worker. You need to be watching her.” He pushed her in your direction.

“Logan—“

“Let’s just go.”

~~~

You stayed in the back with Laura and Charles as Logan drove. You kept your gaze out the window. Laura sighed as she sided eyed you. Slowly, she moved over to your side and pulled at your hand.

“What is it, Laura?” You asked, trying not to sound exhausted.

She held up her palm and wiggled her fingers around.

“She wants you to make a flame,” Charles said with a smile.

You held up your palm and made a small flame. “This?” You questioned.

Laura smiled and nodded. She watched with awe as the flame flickered above your palm. You were watching her reaction, that you missed the soft smile Logan had as he watched you from the rearview mirror. Charles noticed that Laura’s backpack was open. He reached in, pulling out X-Men comics. He smiled as he noticed they were mostly about you.

“Laura,” he called, motioning to the comics, “are you a fan?” Her enthusiastic nod caused Charles to chuckle and you to melt. “Yeah? I am, too.”

“Charles,” you shook your head with a scoff, unable to stop the smile.

“Logan though,” Charles motioned to the man driving, “she’s her biggest fan.”

Laura shook her head, causing you to laugh. You closed your palm, extinguishing the flame.

“Get some rest,” you urged. Laura immediately cuddled into your side.

You couldn’t help but wrap an arm around her to keep her close. You glanced up towards Logan, meeting his softened gaze in the mirror.

“You all should get some sleep,” Logan muttered. “I’ll keep driving.”

“You sure?” You asked.

“Get some rest, sweetheart.”

~~~

Logan drove to Oklahoma City, where the night life was bustling. Laura woke up and moved from your side to the window, staring at all the bring lights.

“Is this where we’re hiding out?” Charles asked.

“We’re not hiding out,” Logan responded. “We’re gonna get a couple of hours’ sleep, clean up, get some new clothes, get a new ride and get outta here.”

Logan pulled the limo up to the front of a Hotel and Casino. He got a suite with two rooms, two bathrooms, and a living room with a couch in the middle. On the way to the elevator to head there, Laura stopped in front of a store window, looking at the clothes.

“Come on, let’s go,” Logan urged. “Hey Laura.”

“We need clothes,” Charles said.

You placed a hand on Logan’s arm, catching his attention. “I’ll deal with the clothes,” you told him. “Why don’t you get everyone else upstairs and settled in? I’ll be right there.”

Logan was heavily debating on telling you no. But he was exhausted and needed to give Charles his meds. “Fine.” He dug into his pocket and pulled out some cash. “Let me know if you need more.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead.

You went over to Laura, who was still by the windows. “Go with Logan. I’ll grab the clothes and be right up.”

Laura hesitancy matched Logan’s, which was both cute and annoying. She shook her head and grabbed your hand. You sighed and looked back at Charles and Logan.

“I guess she’s staying with me,” you told them. You could see that Logan didn’t like that plan. “We won’t be long.”

With huff, Logan gave a nod and you headed into the store.

~~~

Logan had already cleaned up Charles and put him in to bed when you and Laura arrived with the clothes. You set the bags on the coffee table as Logan stepped out of the other room, downing a small bottle of alcohol.

“Kid will sleep on the couch,” Logan said. “We get the bed in here.”

You nodded, looking Logan up and down. “You should get cleaned up.”

“So should you… I can wait until the morning.”

Suddenly, Laura was back at your side, grabbing your hand. She tugged at it before placing it palm up. You laughed.

“Do you want a flame?” You asked. She nodded. You lifted up your other had and formed small flames in both of your palms.

Keeping her eyes on your flames, Laura side stepped over to Logan and tugged at his jacket. She pointed at your flames.

“Yeah,” he gave you a soft smile. “She’s cool, kid.” He took her head and guided her to sit down on the couch. “Now, stay here. Sleep.”

You let Laura take one last look at your flames before you extinguished them. Logan took the needed steps over to you and took your hands. With a groan, he pulled you up.

“Come on,” he muttered, guiding you to the bedroom.

You turned your head. “Good night, Laura.”

Logan shut the door between the two of you and Laura before guiding you back to the bathroom and shutting that door. He wrapped you up in his arms and held you close.

“I thought you were going to die,” he whispered, failing to hide the shake in his voice.

“I’m right here, Logan,” you replied quietly.

He pulled away quickly as he began to cough, using the counter to hold himself up. You placed a warm hand on his back and began rubbing circles.

“You’re getting worse,” you mumbled.

“I’m—“ he coughed, “fine.” He wiped off his lips with his jacket as he turned back to face you. His hands found your hips and pulled you into him.

“We should get some rest. We can clean up in the morning.”

The two of you took some of your clothes off before stepping back into the bedroom. Both of you immediately noticed Laura sitting in the bed, waiting for the two of you.

“No,” Logan said, shaking his head. “There’s a perfectly good couch out there. Go.”

“Logan,” you giggled, “the bed is big enough.”

“Are you serious?”

“I can sleep in the middle. If you can’t handle it, there’s a perfectly good couch out there.”

Logan’s jaw clenched, hating how you used his own words against him. He already knew he wouldn’t get much sleep tonight, but he had least wanted to hold you close as he failed to sleep. Besides, he was also done fighting with you. It was taking too much out of both of you.

“Fine,” he sighed before pointing at Laura, “but stay on your side of the bed.”

Laura moved to one side, allowing you to crawl into the middle. Logan went around to the other side. Laura went to cuddle into you, but Logan quickly pulled you back into him.

“My wife,” he growled, tightening his arms around you.

You could sense the growing tension between the two and you quickly placed an arm out towards Laura and on arm on top of Logan’s. “There’s enough of me to go around,” you told them.

You weaved your fingers through Logan’s as Laura wrapped around your outstretched arm. You watched as she fell asleep. Logan kissed your head before he buried his head into your neck. For that brief moment, there was a sense of peace and family in that room, causing you to fall asleep with a small smile on your face.

~~~

Logan was up first. He took care of Charles, changing him, before laying out Laura’s clothes. He took your new clothes and his into the bathroom. As he came around to pick you up from the bed, he noticed Laura carefully watching him. She was still gripping your arm. Logan went to pulled you into him when Laura growled.

“Stop that!” Logan scolded as quietly as he could. “I’m just trying to take care of her. I’m not gonna hurt her… She’s my wife. I love her.”

Laura hesitated a moment before she let go of your arm. Logan pulled you up into his arms and carried you into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him with his foot. You moaned as you began to come to. Logan set you on the counter and held you up.

“Logan?” You rasped.

“Hey, princess,” he gave you a small smile before pecking your lips.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking care of my wife, like I should be.”

Logan pulled off your shirt, revealing the new scar from the bullet wound. Logan’s calloused hand gently ran over the scar before he bent down and kissed it. You closed your eyes, inhaling sharply at Logan’s tenderness. He trailed kisses up your neck to your ear before pulling away.

“I’ll be right back,” he whispered. “Gotta start the shower.”

You nodded, giving Logan the signal to move. He moved as quickly as he could to get the shower on and remove his clothes before helping you with the rest of yours. Logan wrapped his arms around you, but you pushed against his shoulders.

“You can’t go carrying me around like you used to,” you said, running a hand through Logan’s hair. “It hurts you too much.”

“I don’t give a fuck,” he responded. “Let me carry you until I die.”

Logan firmly kissed you as he carried you over to the large hotel shower. He held you up against the tile wall.

“Logan,” you breathed.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he whispered against your lips. “Let me show you.”

~~~

After some shower sex, you and Logan lovingly washed each other before getting ready for the day. Logan kept coughing, causing you to help him get dressed. You were grabbing his shirt when he began coughing into a towel. He pulled it away to see specks of blood on it. He quickly tossed it away, not wanting to worry you further, before downing another small bottle of alcohol.

“Here,” you said, holding up the shirt.

“I can do it,” he grumbled.

“I know, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be getting help.” As carefully as you could, you helped Logan put his shirt on, his flannel, and then his jacket. “There.” You fixed the collar. “Ready to save the world.”

His hands slid around your waist, tugging you into him. “I don’t want to save the world anymore… I just want to save my world.”

The two of you shared a kiss before exiting the bathroom.

“I’ll go check on Laura and Charles,” you said, noticing Logan eying Logan’s bag and the files spilling out. You reached down and grabbed his glasses from the table, sliding them onto his face. “Mmm,” you hummed, “handsome.” You gave him another kiss before heading to the other part of the hotel room.

Logan sat down on the end of the bed and began flipping through the files. The files held information on the mutant children, including Laura. It also confirmed that Logan’s genetics were used to create Laura. He tossed the files aside and continued looking in Laura’s bag. There were X-Men comics, most of them were about you. He flipped through one, the ending page catching his eye. You were in a wedding dress while Logan was pictured in a tux. The two of you were kissing at your wedding. Logan’s heart clenched at the thought of making it official. Grabbing the comics, Logan marched into the room which Charles was laying on the bed watching a movie and you were helping Laura tie her shoes.

“You read these in your spare time?” Logan questioned Laura, holding up the comics. “Oh, yeah, Charles, Y/N, we got ourselves an X-Men fan. Or, an Ember fan more like it. You do know they’re all bullshit, right? Maybe a quarter of it happened, but not like this. In the real world, people die! And no self-promoting asshole in a fucking leotard can stop it!”

“Logan,” you scolded.

“This is ice cream for bed-wetters!”

“Logan,” Charles tried.

“That nurse has been feeding her some grade-A bullshit.”

“She’s allowed to believe in the good of what we did, Logan,” you said. “We did do a lot of good… and even the good times end.”

Logan scoffed.

“I don’t think Laura needs reminding of life’s impermanence,” Charles added. “Did you say something about finding us a new ride?”

Logan picked up the pill bottle on the dresser and held it up. “Two more pills in one hour.” He threw them at Laura, who caught them. “Give ‘em to him.” He grabbed your hand and dragged you into the other room.

“You need to be nicer to her,” you whispered, growing angry at him. “She is your daughter.”

“No, she’s not. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Don’t leave the room.” He yanked you closer, crashing his lips against yours. “I love you.”

Logan slipped out of the room, leaving you standing there. Your hand went up to your lips, fingers brushing against them as the taste of alcohol and blood lingered on them.

Chapter Text

You made sure that Laura and Charles were busy with the movie before you slipped back into the bathroom. Studying the area, you finally noticed the many empty bottles of alcohol. Walking around, you noticed a hand towel that had been tossed in the corner. You lifted it up and gasped at the sight of blood. Your knees gave out beneath you as it hit you. You didn’t have much longer with Logan. You were going to lose him for good and you were no where near prepared for it.

You failed to realize that the door opened behind you as your sobs took over. Laura quietly came in and knelt beside you. Her hand reached out to your hands, which were now in flames and burning the towel.

“Laura,” you gasped, noticing the girl. She pointed to the flames. “Oh!” You killed the flames. You looked over at Laura. “I’m sorry you—uff!”

Laura launched herself at you, hugging you tightly. You dropped the burnt towel and hugged her back. You felt terrible that this little traumatized girl was comforting you. You should be the one comforting her.

“I’m okay,” you told her. “I’m okay.”

There was no doubt that Laura was Logan’s child. Especially when she was constantly worried or connected to you. Somehow she got Logan’s attachment to you.

You pulled away from the girl, who was still looking at you with great concern. “Why don’t we see if there’s a game to play or another movie to watch?”

Laura nodded so you took her hand and the two of you headed back to Charles.

~~~

Logan had been gone for about an hour at this point. The three of you had moved into the living room area, where Charles was looking at all the people on the streets. Laura was flipping through her X-Men comics.

“It’s time for your medication, Charles,” you said. “I’ll grab some water and then you need to take them.”

“Fine,” he waved you off, still focusing down below.

You went into the bathroom and grabbed one of the cups. You didn’t even get to fill it up before you heard the door kicked open. Running out of the bathroom, you shot fire at the first gun man. He stumbled back into the hall way in flames. Four more men rushed into the room. Two of the guns went off and before you knew it, a bullet was in Laura’s leg, causing her to fall to the floor, and a bullet was in your shoulder. You cried out in pain as you stumbled forward, one of your hands gripping your shoulder. Laura roared in frustration as two more men entered.

“Laura!” You exclaimed as you saw one of the men pull out large cuffs.

There was nothing else you could do as Charles cried out and began seizing. His head fell back as the high-pitched noise went out in waves. A silent scream sat in your mouth as you fell to your knees. The men around the hotel room froze as the psychic attack worsened. Your eyes squeezed shut as your body fully gave out on the floor. Blood began to trickle from your nose and ears as the wound in your shoulder continued to bleed. Your breath became to come out in gasps as you felt the air thin around you. This had been the longest time you had stayed conscious during one of Charles’ seizures, and you were silently praying for it to end.

Despite the disorientation, you could hear the familiar sound of metal claws and grunting coming up from the hallway. Laura’s grunts could also be heard and the small movement of medical supplies.

Logan plunged his claws into the first guy after he came to the open door and saw their guns pointed at you, Laura, and Charles. He saw you unmoving on the ground and bleeding, making him want to throw up. Laura was grunting and groaning on the ground as she tried to crawl to Charles with the syringe that could stop the seizure. Logan stabbed two more men before he tumbled into the table, trying to push through the immeasurable pain.

Clenching his jaw, Logan pushed forward, stabbing into the remaining men before kneeling behind Charles. His shaking arm reached back to Laura, who was trying to hand him the syringe. Logan took it and plunged it into Charles neck, immediately stopping the seizure.

The psychic hold Charles had on everything disappeared, causing everyone to collapse. The men were all dead, but that didn’t stop Logan’s fear for your life. Logan turned to see Laura crawling over to you. You were now unconscious and still bleeding. Laura checked your pulse at your neck before she tore out the bullet. She glanced back at Logan, who gave her a thankful nod. Everyone was panting, trying to catch their breath as the stayed in their spots for a moment. Logan looked down and noticed a camera on one of the dead men. He grabbed it.

“Shit!” He exclaimed. He pushed himself up and over to the window.

“Is everyone alright?” Charles asked, glancing around. His eyes fell on you and your state, with Laura sitting protectively beside you. “No… I’m so sorry.”

“We gotta get out of here,” Logan stated. “Laura, grab your things and the wheelchair. I’ve got the meds and Y/N.”

Laura moved quickly as she went to gather her things. Logan went over and stuffed the medication in a bag, before his focus fell on you. His trembling hand went over to your shoulder, thankful that the wound was already healing. He needed to clean you up, but there was no time for that. Laura took Charles’ wheelchair as Logan threw the bag over to Laura and then scooped you up in his arms.

Logan held you close and kept near Laura and Charles as they took the elevator to the main floor and saw the damage that was done. People were unconscious and injured everywhere.

“I’m sorry,” Charles cried. “I’m so sorry.”

Logan led the way to the new truck he took. Laura opened the front passenger door, allowing Logan to get you in the seat and buckled before he helped Charles in and put away his wheelchair in the trunk. Sirens were coming closer, making every movement an urgent one. Logan hurried to the driver’s seat and sped away, just in time.

One of Logan’s hand held tight to the wheel as the other one reached over the consul to have some physical contact with you. He needed to feel you, that you were still there. It gave him some hope. Though, that hope began to dwindle as they stopped twice for gas and it was now nightfall with no sign of you waking.

“We should stop, Logan,” Charles said. “Get some rest and… and figure out what’s going on.”

Logan used the rearview mirror to look back at Charles and Laura. It was clear that Charles was being eaten up by guilt while Laura couldn’t stop looking at you. She was concerned and scared. Logan understood.

“Fine,” Logan huffed. “A cheap place. Only for a few hours.”

Almost two hours later, Logan found a motel off the side of the road. They didn’t ask for a name and he was able to get two joining rooms, with a total of three beds between the two. Logan was grateful that the rooms were on the first floor, allowing him to get Charles out so that Laura could push him and he could carry you. He unlocked one of the rooms, thankful it was the king bed room. He carefully laid you down before he went and opened the other room and made it joining.

“You two are in the other room,” Logan grumbled, coming back to sit at your side.

“I’m sorry, Logan,” Charles said quietly. “She was getting my meds when they entered.”

“I’ll be in there to put you to bed in a minute. I just need some time alone.”

Charles sighed. “Come, Laura.” He reached out for the girl’s hand, gently taking it. “Let’s give them some space.”

Charles and Laura headed into the other room. Laura didn’t shut the door all the way, leaving it open enough for her to watch the two of you. Logan’s eyes lined with tears as he carefully took your shirt off of you, leaving you in a bra. His eyes fell to the two newest scars, a reminder of how he couldn’t protect you. There was still dried blood on your face and torso.

With a cough, Logan pushed himself from his seat on the bed and limped over to the bathroom. He grabbed a hand towel and got it damp before returning to your side. As carefully as his shaky hands would allow, Logan wiped the blood from your skin. Your steady heartbeat and breathing was the only things keeping Logan from having a serious breakdown.

After you were cleaned up, Logan tossed the towel away and pulled off his jacket and flannel. Gently, Logan dressed you in the flannel and buttoned you up. His fingers trailed down your cheeks.

“Come on, baby,” he whispered. “Wake up… I… I need you.” You made no move to wake. “Sweetheart, please.” He held a kiss to your forehead, like he could wake you up with just the tender act. “I can’t continue on without you.”

He sighed when you didn’t respond. Turning away to go take care of Charles, your hand reached out and gripped onto his wrist. Logan whipped around to see you, eyes half open, staring at him.

“Thank fuck,” he muttered, pressing another kiss to your forehead. “You need to stop scaring me like that.”

“Yeah, well…” you groaned, moving to sit up, “you need to stop lying to me.”

“What? I—“

“I found the towel, Logan. The bloody towel you coughed into… why did you hide it from me?”

“I don’t want to worry you anymore than I already am.”

“Well you’re doing a terrible job.” Logan chuckled, his hands coming up to gently hold your face. “We’re running out of time, Logan.”

Logan hated how you were right. “I can run faster.”

“You used to be able to, honey. But your body isn’t the same anymore.”

He leaned his forehead against yours. “I don’t want to leave you.”

A tear slipped down your cheek as your hands came up to hold onto his wrists. “I don’t want you to leave either.”

“We finish this and then we’ll go off… We make the most of the time we have left.” He brushed his lips over yours but didn’t move to fully kiss you yet. “I will fight to stay with you.”

You made the move to fully kiss him. Your hands moved from his wrists to Logan’s back, tugging him toward you. Logan’s hands stayed on your face, keeping you engaged in the kiss. Despite his desire to continue, Logan pulled away and turned his head to the side, breaking into a coughing fit. You sat up more, placing your hand on his back.

“I’m here,” you whispered. “I’m right here.”

When his coughing died down, your head fell to his shoulder and his head gently rested on top of yours. Logan and you sat in silence as his breathing when back to normal.

“I should go grab you food,” Logan whispered.

“No,” you wrapped your arms around him. “Don’t leave… not again… Just hold me tonight, please… don’t let me go.”

Logan’s arms wrapped around you before he pulled you into his lap. “I’ve got to go take care of Charles, but I will be right back.”

“How are Charles and Laura?”

“They’re fine. Just worried about you.” He kissed your head. “Stay here and rust. I’ll be back.”

Logan slipped you back onto the bed and opened up the adjoining door. Laura stumbled back, causing you to giggle. She had clearly been watching the whole interaction.

“Kid—“

But before Logan could scold her, Laura was running past him and crushing you in a hug.

“Hey!” Logan yelled. “Careful, kid!”

“She’s fine, Logan,” you waved him off as you hugged Laura back.

“It’s good to see you awake, Y/N,” Charles said from the doorway.

You shot him a smile. Logan sighed as he and Charles headed further into the other room. Your fingers began combing through Laura’s hair as she continued to hold you tightly.

“I know it was you that got the bullet out,” you quietly said. “Thank you.”

Laura nodded against you. Logan tucked Charles in and then stopped in the doorway, watching you comfort Laura. Even though Logan was struggling with Laura, he was grateful that you were able to be there for the child.

“Okay, kid,” Logan said, stepping into the room, “time for bed.”

Surprisingly, Laura let you go. She studied you over before slipping out of bed and heading to the adjoining room. Before she closed the door, Laura looked back.

“Goodnight, Laura,” you smiled.

Laura nodded before closing the door fully. Logan toed his shoes off before pulling down his plants and pulling off his shirts. He crawled down the bed and pulled you into him. You cuddled into him and took a deep breath through your nose. Though Logan hadn’t had a cigar in a few days, the smell still lingered on him. It was purely Logan. Your heart cracked at the thought of how much you’d miss that smell.

“I want to get married,” Logan quietly admitted.

You moved so that you could see his face. “What? But we—“

“I want it real. Tomorrow. We find one of those stupid chapels or a judge and we get married. You are my wife, Y/N, and I am your husband. Let’s make it real… before it’s too late.”

Tears welled up in your eyes. “Yes… please.”

Logan kissed your lips so tenderly you thought you were going to melt. “I love you so much, sweetheart.”

“I love you more.”

“Impossible.”

~~~

Logan was incredibly grateful to find that there was a small wedding chapel around the corner from the motel. Laura and Charles sat in the pews as you and Logan stood in the front, holding hands.

“We are gathered together to witness the marriage of James Logan Howlett and Y/N L/N,” the minister began. “Marriage is a commitment in life, where two people can find and bring out the very best in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other human relationship can equal, a physical and emotional joining that has the promise of a lifetime. James and Y/N, do you present yourselves willingly and of your own accord to be joined in marriage?”

“We do,” you both said, keeping your eyes locked on each other.

“Will you promise to care for each other in the joys and sorrows of life, come what may, and to share the responsibility for growth and enrichment of your life together?”

“We will.”