Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The air was hot. Sticky. It was miserable outside, the hottest that it had been all summer and it was only going to get worse as it dragged on. Coriolanus hated the summer, more than anything else, no matter how many weekends were spent out at the lake. It never seemed to be able to make up for just how awful it felt having to get strapped into it all. 

It always felt unnecessary, just how much they had to keep themselves together, especially on light duty like they were in the day-to-day. The days when all they did was stand around the market and ensure that no one was stealing or selling illegal goods. The days where all it took was a stern look for most trouble to end before it even began. It didn’t take much, most people of District 12 had learned over the years the ones that you listened to right away. 

Sergeant Snow was one of the few names that seemed to carry any weight these days. The years hadn’t erased the first meeting most of the district had with him. Front and center at the Hanging Tree, grip tight around his gun as he waited for someone to step out of line. It was only intensified by the fight in the Hob that night, where a few punches had knocked out Billy Taupe and he’d had to be pulled off of him. The face of a man that didn’t take any shit from the men of the district. He was often the first one called out to deal, to get in between, a sight that was often seen as unfriendly for many in the district. 

He was constantly there, a face that they all knew too well at that point. One who tried to be gentle, even though gentle was far from what the job allowed. As much as he wouldn’t take their shit, he was right there to be sure they were safe. That no matter what, they were taken care of. No matter what the costs.

The kindest he would seem would be at nights out at the Hob. Always sat silently at the back in the same spot, drink in his hand and hard stare taking in the sight. Never with much spoken and the chair to his left always empty, the only notion of kindness being when a few of the Covey twirled around asking for donations. The flicker of a smile, passing over sweets and little coins, and never with much more than a few words. There was a feeling of safety when he was around, a sense of calm, at least for the Covey. 

“It’s too damn hot.” It was a whine from the youngest who was standing right by, trying to tug on his vest. “Why do we always get stuck with this stupid shift?” 

“It’s only gonna get worse, Suds.” Beanpole, as always, tried to at least sound like it wasn’t as bad as it was. But they all knew that it was the truth. Each year it felt hotter and more excruciating, which usually led them to try and trade out for night shifts if possible. “Reaping day’s the worst. We’re even more dressed up than this. Worst day of the year.” 

“All you do is bitch.” It took everything in Coriolanus to not roll his eyes at the voice. A face he was sure would have read right through him if he was looking at him. “You signed up for this shit, get over it.” In some ways, he’d agreed in a heartbeat. But the fact it was him who had mentioned it, the last thing he wanted to agree with was that. 

“Don’t have to be an asshole, Bull’s Eye.” 

The name caused his jaw to clench, reaching to fasten his vest. It'd been nearly eight years. And the name still made him sick to hear spoken out loud. No matter how much time would go past, it'd always been one that would cause him to lift his head. There was always some hope that he’d see that familiar face that had once been attached to it. “Yeah, stop being an asshole.” It took too much in him to straighten himself up, eyes finally lifting to look at the man. It’d always been a harsh stare, one that seemed familiar and he could never quite place. But one that he hated nonetheless. “And it’s Perch, address him as that. That name’s taken.” 

Maybe it was bitter. Maybe it was an anger that rocked into him too much. But the last thing he ever wanted to do was call him anything but his last name. The other had been on his tail since the moment he’d gotten there, a year after he had. He’d been fresh from the districts and eager to please, something that had led to his ego seeming to grow each time Commander Hoff gave him the time of day. He’d followed right behind him in the track of Sergeant, something they shared more than he would have liked.

“By who?” 

The questioning just sent another wave through him, pushing past the other as he made his way over to the armory door. “Come get your shit.” Avoidance. It was the easiest way to deal with him. More times than not he could manage his way out of patrols with him, whether he had to beg and plead for just that was another story. 

“Why the fuck do people just let their fucking kids run around like they have no sense?” Always a complaint, about something or another seemed to leave Perch more than anything. Especially when it came to the people in the District. Even if he’d come from one himself, he always seemed to make sure they knew his own was leagues above this one. “I mean, doubt those ones do, but guess the parents don’t care what happens to their little urchins.” 

“Do you ever shut the fuck up?” It was out before he stopped himself, reaching in for one of the rifles and shoving it against Perch’s chest. It was rough, keeping his hand pressed against his chest as he met his gaze. “You signed up for this shit. Get over it.” There was a shove against the other, nudging him out of the way of the door. 

He didn’t miss the harshness in the other’s stare, in the way that he was trying to create some sort of argument back. Smiley had at least squeezed between before anything could be said, sending him a look. The usual smile that graced his kind face was far from sight, his head shaking at the sight of him. “You need to cool it. Now.” 

“He started it.” Childish. Even after all of these years, he knew that was exactly how he was being. No matter how old he got, it trickled out far more than he'd like it to. 

“And you need to end it.” He'd always been wiser, it felt, he held every secret in the world. And at least seemed to have the sense of mind that they could lack when they were getting riled up. “He's gonna go run his mouth back to Hoff like he always does, and you're gonna end up with another rotation like this. Get it damn together.” 

His eyes lifted, and he looked over Smiley’s shoulder to see where Perch was standing. He was awful, in his eyes, the kind of District scum that his Grandma'am had always gone on about. A kind of scum he rarely thought was true, held only for the worst of them. “Could just accidentally take the safety off.” When he saw the look on Smiley's face, he rolled his eyes with a laugh. “It's just a joke. It wouldn't be an accident.” It sounded close enough to a joke, a tease, reaching to grab out the gun for him and passing it over. 

The start of a laugh left Smiley as he took the rifle from him, getting it settled over his back. “You're close to that promotion, Gent. It's what he wants, thinks if you'll trip up, he's getting it. Don't be stupid, man.” 

“I’ll be on my best behavior,” he promised, passing him over another gun for Beanpole before he reached for another two. He slung them both over his shoulder, shaking his head as he glanced back over toward him. “Best as I can, at least.” 

“I’m not gonna hold my breath on that, Gent.” Which, he didn’t blame him for, not for a moment. He tried to keep his cool. He attempted it, at least, which was better than nothing. But it rarely meant much these days. 

He locked the armory behind him, making his way back over to the men. He passed the extra rifle over to Suds, moving behind him to work on getting his vest fixed on him. No matter how many times they had gone through the motions, day in and day out, the kid seemed to never get it together. “Stay still.” 

“They always that loud?” The question took him a few moments to even try and register just what he was talking about. Laughter, it sounded like, what he would only assume were the kids that Perch had been bitching about right outside the fence. 

“They’re kids,” he sighed, his brow furrowing as he glanced over to all the noise itself. They were all over the place, especially during the summer. More times than not, they were out toward the square or the market, but they’d seemed to have made their way up near the base for the day. “School’s on break until after the reaping. Trust me, you’re gonna wish for all this noise on that day.”

“They’re annoying. Can’t we just tell them to go away? Why are they even up here?” He’d been around Perch too much. The anger and the annoyance seemed to stain everything that the kid was. 

Coriolanus sighed, shifting to clip the straps before he patted against his shoulder. “Because, Suds, they look at us and they see their little toy soldiers. Sometimes, they don’t hate us like the rest of them do. They’re kids.” His voice was soft, just loud enough for him to hear. “You get them to trust you now, they’re less likely to cause trouble in the future. You act like he does, no one’s going to take you fucking seriously when they get higher than your knee.” 

“So we just let them do what they want?” 

“If the worst they’re doing is laughing, you leave them be.” Maybe it was a soft spot. That's exactly what he could hear his father saying in his head. Maybe he’d gotten soft over the years, where he didn’t mind the few moments of joy that they got to hear. Real joy, a kind that couldn’t be duplicated on his own. And maybe that wasn't a bad thing. “If they start throwing shit, then you have a problem and you get them to knock it off. Understood, Private?”

“Yes sir.” A nod from Suds, who still looked like everything was too big for him. Like he was just some kid in a costume, trying to prove himself. He would always be surprised that he had made it as far as he had, that he’d even made it past basics. He had a whole life ahead of him. One he was sure would drag if he became anywhere near as bitter as Perch seemed to be. 

He patted the top of his helmet, making his way past him to the rest of the group. “It's an easy day, double shift, we stop for dinner,” he spoke, looking between the four of them in front of him. “We're in the Market during the daytime. You two are on opposite patrols, meet halfway at Sae's. Keep an eye out if anyone goes in the back. Be listening, no running your mouths.” He sent a look toward Perch, who rolled his eyes in response. 

Another bout of laughter from the other side of the fence. 

“It's gonna be busy. Kids are out of class, they're gonna be buying things for their celebration dinners. Keep an eye out, report anything that seems off.” Something they already knew, something that always felt ridiculous to be repeating. “If they seem like they're struggling to grab something, help them. Show them kindness, they'll show it back.” 

A scoff left Perch, something he was far from surprised from at that point. It was another disagreement they always seemed to share. That the people of the district didn't deserve that kindness. Even if that kindness was as simple as it was. Fear. That was what he seemed to believe was the best way to control those around him. Maybe before, it would have seemed a much more logical want. But now? It was the last thing he wanted to be known for. The hatred, the anger that had lasted for too long within him. 

“Yeah, I’m sure they’ll be thinking of how kind we are when they slice our throats.” It was ridiculous. A worry that sounded insane. It’d been years since much violence had broken out, since any bit of a murder. Fights? Absolutely. But not since that terribly tragic death of Billy Taupe and Mayfair had there been any sign of something so extreme. 

A loud thud sounded behind them, one he didn’t think for a second about. He was sure it was a ball, or a rock, something that was far from a concern at that point. 

“Better keep your chin down then.” Or don’t. He far from cared at that point. His gaze hardened as Perch seemed to take that as some sort of challenge, trying to step up to him in response. “You have a problem?” 

“You think a single one of them out there give a shit about you, Snow? Think any one of them even knows who the hell you are?” It nearly made him laugh, eyes falling back onto Smiley and Beanpole who were trying their hardest not to laugh. “That supposed kindness is gonna bite you in the ass one of these days. None of them care about you.”

“They don’t have to,” he spoke, voice as soothing and calm as he could be. No matter how much he could feel his blood boiling. He would never understand just how he’d gotten stuck with the other, but he hated every rotation he had with him. “That doesn’t mean I can treat them like they’re not humans.” 

“Oh? Now you care if they’re humans?” It was the kind of questioning that would always throw him, the way he pushed about things in a way he could never quite place. 

Another thud from behind them, just beyond the gate. 

“H… hey.” He’d barely even heard Suds’ voice echoing further away from them. 

“I don’t know what your issue is, but if you’re going to act like this, Perch, get your ass back to the barracks and make our day much less miserable.” It was almost comical in itself, standing toe-to-toe with the man. “It's your choice.” 

“I'm not going fucking anywhere.” Another rattle of the fence. “You'd let them get away with murder, I'm sure if you think they're pretty enough. That's why that little bitch hasn't been hung yet.” 

Smiley's arm moving between them was the only thing that kept his fist from swinging. There was a shove against his chest, enough for Smiley to shift between them both, to give enough cover. 

“Hey, you stop-” Another shaky attempt at words, just behind him. 

There was too much, his brain rushing, already trying to figure out his best way around Smiley without the other stopping him. Another rattle of the fence caused his body to turn far too quickly over toward where the noise was. 

“Hey!” His voice boomed, stern enough that the few kids he could catch on the other side of the fence seemed to stand still. “Get out of here. I’ll put your asses in the cage and your parents can come and pick you up, and you’ll be front row at the Reaping.”

His eyes fell onto a handful of kids, ones that he’d caught far too many times. If he stood there long enough, he could name each one that was in his line of sight. He’d seen most of them from the moment they’d been born, and just how they’ve grown. They were all frozen in place, it seemed, like they weren’t sure what was the right move. 

His arm shifted the gun in his arms, to shift it around his shoulders behind him. “Now!” The boom of his voice sent far too many running off, watching most of them rush off in their panic. It was far from the kind he attempted to be, but there were limits. It was far from the worst offense but it’d all bubbled up too quickly. 

He glanced back over his shoulder to where Smiley was still in front of Perch, his back turned as he spoke to him. There was no telling just what was being said but he hoped more than anything, it was telling him to fuck right off. 

His gaze turned back to in front of him, falling onto the only child still stuck in his spot. It’d been like he’d been frozen to his spot, his bare feet in the dirt just outside the fencing. He was met with big blue eyes, filled and wet with tears like he would burst into them any moment. A head of curls, blonde and messy, half fallen into his face, a sweet little face that he wanted to reach through the fence to soothe. 

There was a bit of noise behind the boy, another pair of bare feet kicking through the dirt. Another small hand reached to take the boy’s, a gentle tug at him with a soft little voice. “C’mon.” The girl sent Coriolanus a look, one that he could only point to being one that matched her mother’s. The look of disgust, of ease, one that he’d been unfortunate enough to be on the other end of too many times. Brown eyes that matched her mother’s just the same, a carbon copy of her nearly to the tee. “He don’t want us here.” 

His brow furrowed as he watched the little girl manage to tug him, at least a bit further away from the fence. It was an odd sight, a sight that he hadn’t been expecting. The two of them were never far away from their mother, or at least one of their aunts or uncles. But instead, here they were all the way up by the base. And barefoot. 

He could hear Perch’s voice, his mouth running the way that it always did, though he couldn’t take his focus off of the sight on the other side of the fence. Not when none of this was making sense, on the fact that she wasn’t there. Maybe something had happened, maybe something was wrong. What if something was wrong? She wasn’t in any bit of a state, especially when most of the house was gone during the work day. Something had to be wrong. 

A thud, a slamming of a door, he was almost sure of, caught his attention. He turned instead to focus on the sound, trying to catch sight of just where it had come from. It was quickly followed by the sound of the gate nearly slamming just as hard. A familiar form came into view, all but stomping away from the base. 

“Hey! Rainbow girl!” The call wasn’t enough to stop her from making her way over to the kids. She was quick in her movement, picking the little boy up and into her arms with a catch of her breath. It was something that had him wanting to speak up, to tell her she didn’t need to be carrying him, that she didn’t need to be having that extra weight to stress her. 

“Lucy!” 

The wrong calling of her name was enough to cause her head to whip toward the fence. The look of joy, of gentleness that was normally written across her features was nowhere to be seen. Those gorgeous brown eyes looked just as tearful as the little boy’s in her arms, fingers gripped tight and shaking, something he noticed more than he should have. 

His gorgeous bird looked duller than ever. Even the color of her dress, matching the scarf of his mother's, felt so unlike her. She had her curls tied away underneath the fabric, her sign always of just who she belonged to. Even with the extra ruffles throughout the fabric, she could no longer hide the bump that had continued to grow. Her rainbow feathers were dull and bland, a girl looked like she was trying to make herself smaller than to spread her wings to fly.

Something had happened. He just didn’t know what. She shouldn’t be there. This shouldn’t be anywhere near where she was. They kept their distance when they needed to for a reason.

“It’s Lucy Gray.” Her voice was rough, hiding back what she was sure was the storm that was building inside of her. “What the hell do you want, asshole?” That wasn’t like her either. She tried her hardest to keep it together, keep herself gentle, and keep from slipping in front of the kids. The same kind of language she would get onto him about in front of them. 

“I'm just wondering if Hoff finally decided to stop idolizing you. You look upset.” There was a laugh in Perch's voice, even as Smiley was working to shove him back toward the barracks. “You decide yet what those birds are gonna sing after you're strung up?” 

“Get the fuck out of here,” his own voice sounded, pointed toward Smiley and the fucker. He'd never know just what the problem was, why he was as awful as he was to everyone, but especially Lucy Gray. No matter what she did, he always found something to try and get onto her about.

His gaze fell back on Lucy Gray, who was gripping that much tighter to the two of them. One arm was wrapped around the little boy, her other hand wrapped tightly with the girl’s. It was too much. It was far too much for her, for the state she was in. With whatever storm was building and swirling, that was taking over the sunshine that normally shone right through. 

“Luc-” 

Her head shook in response, quickly enough to quiet him. There wasn't another word out of her, a small tug to the little girl's hand before the three of them disappeared from his line of sight. Back home, he was hoping, as far as they could be from all of this, safe. Safe was what they needed to be. 

“I don't know what your fucking problem is, but if I see you again today, I'm bashing your fucking head in.” He was already walking toward where Perch was being pushed back toward the barracks, Beanpole quickly followed after him to try and slow him down. “You go near anyone, especially our Victor, I'll string you up myself. And I'm sure Hoff will be happy to let me have a crowd while I do it.” 

“Down, boy,” Beanpole groaned, moving to tug him back from getting in his face. Or at least any closer. “Smiley's taking care of him. Take a breath, you already scared the kids.”

The hand against his chest was enough to try and calm him, stilling in his spot. Every part of him wanted to be able to wrap his hands around his neck and squeeze until he stopped breathing. 

“He's getting latrine duty, at the least. Don't care if I have to slip Hoff my entire pay to do it.” He likely couldn't get his hands on him, not how he would like. Not yet, at least. “After he gets a black eye. Maybe a tooth missing while we're at it.” 

“Could just let that little one loose on him. Think she was trying to kill you with her mind, just like her mother.” She was a handful, he knew just that.

Coriolanus nodded at the thought, looking back to the fence as if maybe they would still be there. That maybe they would have come back over, that he could have tried to soothe. It was another reason that it always made him so uneasy, not being able to be right there. To not just be able to reach right out across the bars and calm her, the same way he had all those years before. 

He could feel himself calming, at least enough. It'd be enough, where he’d be able to keep his cool out in public. If he saw any of the kids running about, he'd be able to manage some sort of apology, or something, anything. Though every bit of him was still working just how he could get ahold of the other without getting in more trouble than he likely already would be. 

“Wait.” Suds spoke, following along after them as they made their way out of the gate. “Songbird’s pregnant?” 

“Clearly, Suds.” Beanpole snorted, looking back to the youngest trailing along after them.

“How far is she?” 

Six months, getting closer and closer to seven with each passing day. 

“No clue. Not my business.” Coriolanus could have laughed at himself and Beanpole did. “What’s it matter?”

“Just didn’t know she was seeing somebody.” It sounded like he thought he had a chance with her, which he supposed was far better than how Perch acted about her. “How-”

“I know you’re young but your parents didn’t teach you?” Beanpole teased, shoving him as they made their way down to the market. “When a man and woman love each other very much, they deci-”

“I know how,” the youngest grumbled. “Do we think it’s the same guy? Or are those two even the same guy? They look so different, maybe it’s all diff-”

“Who cares?” Coriolanus asked, turning on his toe to look at the younger. There was some warning in his gaze, in his tone, pausing their movement just long enough. “Just leave her be, Perch already gives her enough hell, don’t add to it.” 

Suds quickly nodded in response, like he was a bit scared about the idea of disagreeing with him and knowing that he was right. There was no point in arguing with him about it, not at that point. Not about Lucy Gray.

“You’ll have to pick up double time, it’s just you out there. Keep your eyes sharp, kid.” He didn’t have to be told twice, disappearing down one of the market aisles like he wanted to be anywhere but there. 

He moved to settle next to Beanpole, the same spot that they always seemed to find themselves in. They’d be able to move quickly enough if they were needed, though they rarely ever were. The sight of them alone was often more than enough to quiet any issues that may come about. 

“He means well, you know?” Leave it to Beanpole. He and Smiley both always tried their hardest to keep him levelheaded about everything. Even though some days it was easier said than done. 

“I’m sure.” It felt ridiculous, entirely, as he adjusted his gun to properly hold it, eyes scanning the crowd around them. It was just as he’d figured it would be, busy, people trying to get their things before everything would shut down. Whether it was meant for a celebration or mourning was yet to be found out just yet. 

“We ran our mouths just as much.” The look he sent his way was enough to cause Beanpole to try and backtrack over his thoughts. “I did, at least, couldn’t hold my liquor just the same as he did. I was a mess. Look at me now, I’m doing great. Just have to let him grow into it.” 

“He’s not going to grow if he’s around that asshole all the time, he needs to be sent back to wherever he came from, everyone would be much better off.” Coriolanus still hadn’t been sure how he’d wound up out here, and he wasn’t sure why he wouldn’t take the offer to go somewhere else. 

He hadn’t, either. But he’d had his reasons. Perfectly valid reasons. It hadn’t been out of spite, or to make anyone’s lives a living hell. It’d been for Lucy Gray. It’d always been for Lucy Gray. Every move, every decision, everything he even attempted, it’d all been for her. 

“I’m sure Hoff will take care of it if you tell him.” Maybe. Possibly. Lucy Gray was the Victor after all. If there was anyone of importance in the District, it was her. But that didn’t make it any easier. That didn’t make it any simpler, either. “Or at least keep him away from anywhere she might be. That’d be better than nothing.”

“Not by much. Six feet in the ground would be better.” That was awful for him to think, something that Lucy Gray would probably get onto him about. Though after the day she’d seemed to have had, it might just be the solution. 

Beanpole sighed, settling beside him at the thought. “You need to do it the right way, Gent. Smiley tells you it nearly every damn day. You get that promotion, you can probably get rid of him.” 

“That’s the hope.” His eyes scanned around them, brows furrowing at the sight that they seemed to land on. It was hard to not catch sight of her, as beautiful as she was. 

There was Lucy Gray, the little boy still settled on her hip like it was where he belonged. The other hand was gripping far too many things, far too much. It didn’t make sense, not everything she was trying to manage to carry. It was too much, far too much, even compared to the normal trip that she’d make to the market when she’d visit. There was an attempt to lift up a jug, though it slipped from her hold, fingers still seeming to be trembling. 

“Someone should help her, right?” He spoke, attention turning over to Beanpole. “Kind thing to do.” 

“I’ve already done my kindness for the day, unfortunately. Guess it’s up to you.” There was a small nudge against him with the butt of the gun. “I can keep watch long enough, don’t worry about any of this.” 

Coriolanus nodded, shifting the gun around his shoulders and to his back properly. He made his way over, looking over a few of the items around them on the shelves. “You need some help, Miss. Baird?” He asked quietly, eyes falling onto the little boy. But all he did was cower back away from him at the sight, burying further away into Lucy Gray. 

“Maude Ivory’s on her way with the wagon,” she mumbled, shifting the hold on the jug she was trying to manage. “We’re fine. But thank you, Sergeant Snow.” 

He reached right across to take the jug from her, shifting it into his hold. “It’s not a problem.” They were turned enough, far from gaining any attention around them as people continued to pass by. He didn’t speak another word as he moved to take the rest into his hands, taking mind of just what she had. It was too much, food plenty for far longer than just the weekend and Reaping night. Things he hadn't seen her buy for far too long. 

He reached to pick up another jug that she pointed to, glancing over to her. She was off, completely unlike herself, which only had him more worried than ever. Before he could even try and ask, she interrupted, quieting him. “Are you off this weekend?”

“No.” As much as he wanted to be. Or wished he was. It would likely help calm her nerves a bit about all of this. She always seemed to get a bit more on edge around the Games, but this was worse than she’d ever seen it be. “It’s all hands on deck, Reaping’s on Monday, doubt I can get off.”

“You need to come home.” 

“I ca-” he paused as he met her gaze, seeing the tears that had built, that she was fighting so hard to keep from falling. “When?” 

“Tonight.” There was a shake in her voice, lips pressed together in a frown. “It has to be tonight. I don't ask you for much, ever, but I need you to be there. Please.” 

Coriolanus wanted nothing more than to be able to stay there with her every chance he could. That the two of them could be together just like any other out there. That he could wake up next to her every single night like he wanted so greatly. The promotion. It's what he was leaning on the most. A house, protection, somewhere they could maybe just make it. That no one would think twice about the two of them. 

“Okay,” he whispered, shifting for another item even without her pointing. It'd be enough to seem like he was helping, that the two of them weren't whispering about anything other than what she was needing. “I'll be there.” 

“‘M serious, Coriolanus.” A name he heard less and less often, it seemed. Gent or Snow, was what he heard more times than not. Coriolanus was usually whispered by her in passing when they would still, tucked into the alley away from the cameras. 

“I will, Lucy Gray,” he whispered, looking over to the little boy who was still hidden away in his mother's arms. “Won't be until after dark, but I will.” 

“Don't show your face around me if you don't show tonight,” she mumbled, adjusting in her spot as her attention turned to the other side of him. “Took you long enough.” 

“Little bird couldn't decide if she wanted to ride in it or not,” Maude Ivory. A voice she'd recognize anywhere. Even as she'd gotten older, there was still the sweetness that was laced in it. She'd only gotten taller, still that sweet girl that she had always been. “I got it.” 

“It's okay,” Coriolanus assured, shifting to settle things inside the wagon. He was careful in his placement, making sure he didn't lay any of it on the little girl. She was still giving him that hard stare like she was uneasy with the fact he was there and helping. 

“Thanks, Dad.” It was half teasing, half sincere, the kind of name that would normally have him panicking if there were many others around. “Let me take him.” She was already moving to pick up the little boy from Lucy Gray's arms, who went without much of a fight. But he was still doing all he could to avoid looking at him. Which… well, it was deserved, wasn't it?

“You don't need to be picking up anything heavy,” he reminded, looking back over to Lucy Gray as she moved to pick up a few more things. 

She settled the jugs into the wagon, sending him the same look that was plastered on the face of the girl. “I'm just fine.” Her hand moved to brush over the bump, nearly protectively, looking like there were a dozen things on her mind she wanted to get out. But none of them came. None that he had hoped for, at least. “Thank you, Sergeant Snow, we've got it taken care of.” 

He wanted nothing more than to be able to reach over. He was nearly sure if he could pull her into his arms, maybe everything would be okay. That he could help to soothe, to calm, but he wouldn't be able to. Not yet. Not then. Tonight. Tonight would have to do. 

“Yes, ma'am.” He nodded, taking a step back with a polite smile. “If you need anything else, we're just right here.” 

“We appreciate that, sir.” A small nod, one that said everything that he needed to hear without a word. Everything that she wanted to say and couldn't say aloud.

Coriolanus moved to settle back next to Beanpole, who had been joined by Smiley on his other side. It was quiet, still, watching as the four of them made their way past further into the market. 

“Did that girl call you dad?” 

The question took him off guard, looking over to the lanky man beside him. “What?” 

“That Covey girl. The one you always give the best sweets to without letting us have a chance.” Smiley joined in and that ridiculous wide grin was turned on him. 

“It's not my fault you lot can't get your shit together. They're at least entertaining. If you didn't slack off so much,” he reasoned. As if that made any difference, or if it was even a good enough argument. “She always sends extra for them anyhow.” 

It'd been something that had continued even after… everything. Ma Plinth had continued with packages, with notes, with good wishes and hopes over the years. He was the closest they had anymore, even across Panem.

The two of them shared a look, filled with a bit of laughter. “Sure that's the only reason,” Beanpole laughed, shaking his head. “I just think I should be allowed first dibs on the treats box. It's been like… eight years.” 

“Think you have to call him Dad first.” Smiley was a mess of laughter. It was at least good-hearted teasing, something that only stayed between them more than anything else. If something had been said, even in front of Suds, the two of them would have acted like they hadn't heard a word. 

His eyes rolled in response, catching sight of Suds as he made his way down the aisle past him. Someone else, something else, to turn his attention to, even with the teasing still beside him. “Suds!” 

“Yes sir?” The younger stood straight as could be in attention, waiting to be addressed once more. He was still just as nervous as he had been before, which he was using to his advantage.

“You want the gate duty tonight?” It was the most sought-after, nothing more than making sure the only ones allowed were coming and going from the barracks. It was normally fought over, especially when the Seam was more often than not the option tossed away. 

“I was supposed to be in the Seam with Perch, sir.” 

“He's not working,” he told him, shaking his head. “So you'd be out there, in the dark, with all of them by yourself. You want that?” 

“You sur-”

“5, 4, 3, 2-” he was quickly interrupted with argument and reassurance that he would take them, only causing Coriolanus to nod in response. “Get back to it. You've got some laps to make up.” 

A few hours. A few long, dragging hours was all that was left between the two of them, of the house he would rather find himself waking in. A few hours until he could take off his Peacekeeper hat and take some of the stress off of her shoulders. Even if it wasn't for long, it was something. And that was all he could give. 

Chapter Text

Coriolanus was sure of very few things these days. And today, it was the fact that time was taking damn near forever to pass. Each step, each pass by in the Seam felt like it was taunting him. He was just waiting for the sun to set, for the darkness of the night to be enough to keep him tucked away and hidden. 

It’d been a routine for years now. The Seam route was the least wanted of the rotation, one that normally was tossed to someone who’d gotten in trouble or was the lowest of the squad. They’d all have their rotation out there, if not for anything other than to help keep it less clear when he did pick up an extra rotation or two. He still wasn’t sure exactly what made it the worst, outside of the glares that they might pick up on a lap or two. 

But it was quiet. It was peaceful. The people out there knew how to keep their heads down and their mouths shut. It was far easier to get lost between the spaced-out homes and the birds singing away in the trees in the backyard. Few houses had working lights on the front porch and even fewer gave a shit. It’d been part of why he’d been making good all of those years. He wasn’t anywhere near as much of a threat to them as some of the officers could be. 

Even after the sun had set, he’d had to wait and watch for the right moment. There were far too many laps, ones he’d stopped counting, watching as porch lights turned on and off. He listened as the world started to grow quiet, the only real partner of his rotation being the song of the birds just beyond the treelines. Fireflies gave a bit more light, something that he knew the kids would be chasing away after if they were done at the lake. 

He’d made his way into the treelines, something that was far easier to get lost in if there were any eyes on him still. It was something that he’d always been thankful for when it came to the Covey and the houses they’d found themselves in. They were tucked away, as close to the woods and the meadow as they could be. Their own form of freedom was somewhere they could slip away without much issue and without being caught right away. 

The two Covey homes were side by side, the only thing separating them being the yard in between. It was where the kids would run around for hours at a time, that he’d usually catch sight of them on nights of rotations. Some nights, if he was lucky, one of the boys would come back to the barracks with some story of the kids. Even if it was a passing comment about what the two were up to, or hearing the two of them singing. It was the closest he could get at times and he had to take every bit of it he could. 

He moved to peel off the stupid helmet, hooking it around the strap of his gun. He shifted it in his hold, making his way into the backyard. He hadn’t even made it many steps before the back door had swung open. She always seemed to know just where he was like she knew exactly how many steps it would take for him to be home. 

In the light of the back porch, he could just make her out in his sight. Even in the distance, he could see just how upset she still seemed to be in front of him. She was as pretty as ever, the most beautiful bird in the world. None of that would ever change. 

There was a thud against the tree from where he dropped the gun and helmet out of his hold. It’d be safe enough, and far from the sight of their kids to even have to worry about it. By the time he even made a few steps towards the steps, she had already met him halfway. 

His arms were quick to wrap around her, just wanting to sink into her like the rest of the world was gone. One arm slipped around the small of her back, the other wrapping around the back of her neck, easily tucking her in against him. It’d only gotten more difficult over the months, her growing bump trying to keep some distance between them both. 

Her hands had curled up in the cloth of his uniform, clinging on for dear life. He could hear the hitch in her breath, the unmistakable sound of her fighting back the sob in her throat. She was buried away into his shoulder like she could hide from everything that was going on around her.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, burying his face into her mess of curls. He didn’t know how much he could actually keep that promise. He didn’t know if it was something he could even rightfully say anymore. But he’d do everything he could, every chance he could, to try and prove her just that. 

He took a deep breath, wanting nothing more than to just breathe her in. Buttermilk and roses. A clear sign of bathtime, one that was usually reserved for special occasions or nights when the kids needed to sleep. He was sure it was the latter if the grip she had was any sign. 

There was a gentle rocking in his hold, nuzzled close against her. Maybe he could soothe, to help her breathe, whatever it was she could need in that moment. Her grip tightened, like she was searching for his touch, for his skin, that was hidden away in the cloth of his uniform. 

“It's gonna be okay,” he repeated, feeling Lucy Gray shake her head in response. It had to be something bad. “I've got you, Sugar.” He adjusted his touch, moving to push back her curls. He pressed a kiss behind her ear, gentle and careful with her. “I've got us.” 

He didn't pull away until he felt her start to move, cupping the back of her head as he worked to untangle the two of them. He left a kiss against her temple, as soothing as he could manage to be. His other hand rubbed along the small of her back, just wanting to make things as easy as possible. 

“I've got us,” he repeated, his hand moving to settle on the side of her face. His thumb traced along her jaw, watching the way that she sunk away into his touch. “My best girl.”

Her eyes rolled, though it was all too fondly at the little tease. “You better not let them hear you say that,” she teased, the tears still stuck in her throat. 

“One of my best girls,” he clarified with a small laugh. He cleared the small space between them and attached their lips. It was sweet, and gentle, the kind of kiss that was filled entirely with love. The kind where they could melt into one another and hide from the rest of the world. That the two could pretend. 

They could pretend they were back in the meadow all those years ago. That life was so much simpler. Or it felt that way, at least. He'd left the world he knew and came across Panem to find her again. Something he'd do a thousand times over. It felt less complicated then. Or easier, at least. They didn't have so much on them then, other than falling in love. Now, everything had to be so calculated, so mindful of each step either of them made, of every look they sent each other's way.

Her hand moved to touch his hand on her jaw, her brow furrowing a bit as she pulled away. Her fingers brushed over his knuckles, twisting their hands to pull it away and look at his hand. “What'd you do?” 

“Nothing,” he offered, moving to peck her lips once more before he pulled back, still keeping close to her. “Where are the birds?” 

“With the Covey,” she answered, shifting his hand in hers to look over his knuckles in the light. “How much trouble you gonna get in?” 

“None.” He shrugged at the thought, giving a smile. “He fell during trash duty, he's really clumsy.” It wasn't believable, by any means, but Hoff wouldn't say a word about it. He'd gotten away with worse over the years. 

A sigh left her though she pressed a kiss to his bruised knuckles as she took a step back from him. “I can fend for myself, Coriolanus.” 

“You don't have to,” he answered, all too easily, watching as she made her way up the steps of the back porch. She looked exhausted, like any of the colors in her were just starting to come back from that afternoon. 

“They need to get to bed,” she called over her shoulder as she moved to push open the back door. “You got ‘em?” 

His head nodded, eyes falling on the house next door. He listened quietly, waiting for the song of some of the birds that were in the distance. He whistled the same little melody that Lucy Gray had called him into the alley all those years ago. One she'd taken far too long to teach him, that he'd struggled to try and learn. But one that he'd gotten down nonetheless. 

It was quiet, for a long moment, like all of the world decided to be still. Silence. But it wasn't that for long, watching as the back door nearly slammed open and the sound of little bare feet on wood filled the air. 

He was nearly sure the force that their daughter ran into him would have knocked him off his feet. The harshness that had been turned to him at the market was wiped right away the moment they could. She was wrapped tight around his waist, pressed as close as she could be. 

“Dad.” The name was a bit muffled against him, causing him to chuckle as his hand went to ruffle some of her damp curls. He knew the exact little face he’d find looking up at him. That toothy grin, one he didn't always get to see while he was standing stoic watching his world go by.

Auralee Pearl. Their ray of sunshine that had changed their world. Named after some old song Lucy Gray had sung throughout her pregnancy, one she swore she'd woken up with stuck in her head. A sign from her own Mama, something that would always roll his eyes in fondness about. A song of promises to always return to their love, one that had always felt important to remember for them both. 

Pearl, named alongside Maude Ivory, a color in the same family as his own last name. It had been something that had sent the younger girl into tears when she first heard it. 

A Covey name, something to make sure she fit in with them. One where no one would think twice about who she belonged to, that there was no chance some Capitol boy had fathered her. It was another sense of safety, something that he felt was needed. Whatever it would take to keep his family safe. 

“Hey, Birdie,” he cooed, eyes lifting back toward the other house. He gave a small wave toward where Barb Azure was settled at the back door. Some quiet thanks before his gaze fell on Maude Ivory making her way over. 

In the girl's arms was the little boy, half slumped against her shoulder like he was struggling to keep himself awake. The kind of sweetness he had always loved to see. It was a sight he'd seen Lucy Gray cry over before, the baby of them all carrying around her baby. 

He shifted, just enough to not squish the girl still clinging on, as he pulled the older into a hug. “Hey, sweet,” he hummed, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

“Didn't get you in trouble, did I?” Maude Ivory asked, shifting the little bit in her arms. “Wasn't thinking.” 

“No trouble,” he promised. “No one noticed.” They had but he'd been able to brush it off enough. It wasn't the first time that they'd teased him and it wouldn't be the last. “I've got him.” His hands offered out, looking at the little boy. 

The motion seemed to be enough to stir the boy from his sleepiness. But instead of leaning forward to his hold, he leaned back, his feet wiggling as he tried to push away from Maude Ivory herself. The wiggling was enough to make her settle him on his feet, the head of blond curls making his way up the porch steps. 

It'd been something he'd been thankful for, the darkening of those curls of his. It'd not been by much, but they were no longer the stark blond that matched his own. He fit right in alongside Maude Ivory and CC, just the same as he would next to Tigris. 

“Don't worry about him, he's been in a mood all day.” Maude Ivory shrugged, moving to ruffle the dark curls still attached to his hip. “Just needs some sleep. They both do.” 

“I don't.” There was a soft whine that came from the young girl. The sleepy kind of whine that meant she'd crash any time now. 

“C'mon, bird,” he whispered, leaning down to pick up the girl into his arms. “You're gonna be too big for me to carry you everywhere soon enough.” 

“Never.” The girl wrapped her arms around his neck, nuzzling away into his shoulder. The exact way that her Mama had not that long before. 

“Thank you,” he spoke, giving Maude Ivory a small nod before he turned to make his way into the house. “You ready for bed?” 

“No.” 

He chuckled as he moved to shut the door behind him. “Bet I can read a story if we get in bed quick enough,” he reasoned, which got a happy little hum in response. He leaned down, settling her down onto his feet. “Teeth and bed.” 

He followed her through the house, watching as she disappeared to the bathroom while he continued to their room. There stood Lucy Gray with a look on her face, nodding her head down toward her feet. 

There was their son, arms wrapped around her leg and following each step that she took. When he met those big blue eyes, the head of blond curls hid behind her. 

“AJ.” 

All he got was a whine in response, watching those little hands try and tug at Lucy Gray's dress like he wanted to tug her further from him. 

A sigh left him as he moved to unbuckle the vest of his uniform. It'd make him seem smaller and would take away some of the sight of a different man. The man that was scarier, sterner. The man they had to pretend wasn't theirs. 

He dropped the vest onto the floor, moving to settle onto his knees in front of the boy. His hand reached across the bed to grab the stuffed dog tucked into it. “AJ, you won't believe it,” he started, shifting the old plush in his hold. 

When he was met with quiet, he shifted the dog to face the little boy. “I heard that Aunt Tigris found another Romeo.” 

That seemed to have caught his attention, peeking around her leg with raised brows at the sight. “Another?” 

“Three of them, actually.” He explained, looking down to his old plush. It was looking worse for wear, honestly, and had only gotten more so over the years. Tigris had first sent it when he'd told her about a baby along the way. And the kids would practically drag the poor thing everywhere with them. “All brand new and clean. One for you, one for Birdie, and one for the new baby.” 

It was enough, finally taking a step around Lucy Gray toward him. His little hands moved to rub at his eyes, likely wiping tears away. It's one thing that he saw happen too much. The tears. The way Lucy Gray would still tote him around like he was still a baby. The world was too tough for their son to act that way. Something he knew she'd get onto him about if he mentioned but he knew he was right. He saw the ugly of the world, the harshness. And sometimes he was sure Lucy Gray was still flying in the clouds.

“What about Romeo?” He asked, voice sweet as could be as he pointed to the plush in his hold. 

“I think he'd stay here with Mama,” he answered, nodding his head. “I can't keep him with me, so, do you think she could keep him safe?” 

The young boy turned to look back up to the older, who nodded her head tiredly. “I'll keep him real safe, AJ.” 

He seemed appeased by that, taking the last few steps over to him and into his arms. Though most of his attention was on the plush. He dropped a kiss to the top of his head before he moved to stand, holding him easily in his touch. 

“Let's get your teeth brushed,” he reasoned, reaching his other hand to help himself up with the bed. He could feel the little girl rush past them as they made their way to the bathroom. 

He watched as the little boy brushed his teeth, trying his hardest to not make a mess. He kept his eyes on him in the mirror, listening to the soft little hum coming from the boy. Their kids were full of music, of song, just the same way that their Mama was. It was something he'd always be thankful for. That they'd taken far more after her than him. 

He moved to wipe the toothpaste from around his mouth, adjusting to settle the brush back down for him. “Does Romeo need his teeth brushed?” 

“No.” There was a start of a giggle, tucking the dog back in against him. “He doesn't have teeth, silly.” 

“He doesn't?” He asked, reaching out to point at the reflection of the plush in his hold. “Do you?” 

“Yeah, see.” The little boy opened his mouth wide to show his teeth, smiling like no other. The kind of joy he got to see, the kind of simplicity he rarely was part of, no matter how much he tried. 

The sight of the two of them, side-by-side, in the mirror just made his heart feel tight. There was no denying, in moments like this, that he was his. “Who’s that?” His finger pointed toward himself in the reflection.

“Dad.”

“And who’s that?” His finger adjusted to point at the little boy in the reflection. 

“AJ!” 

Adam Jet. AJ. A name he had far from expected from Lucy Gray but one he hadn't argued with nonetheless. An old tale about the supposed first man on Earth, about a man who only felt fulfilled when his world was complete. She'd always been one to hit the nail on the head when it came to him, to just what everything had to mean. Everything was a sign, everything had a reason. The stars, the fates, the song from the birds. And this was no different. 

Jet had been decided on by shades of colors her own family had held. Blacks and grays that had been part of her family's name for years. Another part of herself that was tucked away into their little boy. Even if he looked more like him than he ever would her, it was clear he was her boy just as well. 

The same wild head of curls he once had, even if they'd darkened compared to his own. Those same blue eyes, ones he had always hated meeting in his own reflection. Eyes that met his own father, a gaze he'd never forget. But now, there was a reason to love his own more than ever. He would always find love deep in the young boy's blue eyes, something that felt terrifying to know that his own wouldn't always hold that. A softness that he had lost at their son's age. He wanted it to stay there forever, even though he knew it just wouldn't be possible. 

“AJ Baird,” he agreed, pressing a kiss to his temple before he turned his way to make it back to their room. “I think it's bedtime.” 

Auralee Pearl had already crawled into her bed, perking up at the sight of them. “Can he sleep in my bed?” 

“He probably needs to be in his own,” he reasoned, glancing over to Lucy Gray where she was gathering up blankets. 

“He always ends up there anyways, it’s okay,” she offered. “Go right ahead.” He’d been just the same, for years on end, always finding some excuse to hide away in his cousin’s bed when he couldn’t sleep. It’d felt safer there, easier. And from how AJ was already moving to get out of his arms, he was sure it was the same for him. 

“We have time for a story?” He asked, taking the blankets from Lucy Gray as they were passed over. It was part of what always felt so awful about nights like this. He’d feel like he was interrupting their routine, how their life went. That maybe his visit would disturb the peace they would find without him there. It’d be something she’d spend hours reassuring it didn’t, though he couldn’t help that pit in his chest about it all. 

“Don’t know if they’ll stay up for it, but yeah,” she reasoned, squeezing past him to tuck the two of them in. “We read the fables last night, so, anything else,” she offered, gesturing toward the basket that sat between the beds. 

He made his way over to the basket, searching through the hand-stitched storybooks that were inside. It’d started as one, some attempt at a storybook from Maude Ivory when she had found out that there would be a baby. The first had been Goldilocks, pieced together with scraps of paper that she had found around the Covey home. Most of the stories were far from word-for-word how they should have been, more times than not made from the memory of having been told it by Lucy Gray. The pile had grown over the years, and the writing and drawings had improved. But they still had the heart, the sweetness that was Maude Ivory all of those years before. 

He searched through the stack, one story already on his mind of what they needed, moving to pull it out once he’d found it. It was stuck underneath the rest of them like it hadn’t been thought about for a while. “I think this is a good one after today.” He flipped to turn the front of it toward Lucy Gray. 

“We never read that one!” AJ spoke up before Lucy Gray had been able to get whatever thought had been there out. 

“It’s pretty scary,” she explained, sending him over a look as she worked to get them tucked in properly under the covers. 

Coriolanus looked between the two of them, shifting in his spot to settle on the edge of the bed. “So’s life.” Maybe that wasn’t the best thing for him to say. “I’m sure they’ve heard much worse things at school by now.” 

A sigh moved through her, leaning down to press kisses against their heads before she moved to stand. “Probably,” she mumbled, moving to pick up his vest off of the floor. “Be good for Dad, I love you.” She was met with a call of the same back to her before she made her way out of the room. 

She was tired and the day had been far from kind to her, from the sound of it. He’d give her a bit of space and get the two of them to sleep before anything else. Whatever it took to make it a little easier for her to deal with. 

“You ready?” he asked, smiling as he got the little nods from the two of them. They were cute as could be, cuddled up with each other with the plush between them both. His fingers moved to open the tale, clearing his throat. “ Next to a great forest, there lived a poor woodcutter with his wife and his two children. The boy's name was Hansel and the girl's name was Gretel...”

They’d barely gotten halfway through the tale before the two of them had slipped to sleep. The house was quiet and peaceful, something he just wanted to sink into. As much as he loved all of the noise, all of the signs of joy, sometimes the silence was even better. It was the knowledge that the soft sounds of the two of them sleeping meant that they were safe. That nothing would happen to them, that they’d made it another day. 

He sat in silence for a long while, just taking in the sight of the two of them as they slept. He could let the sight stay in his mind, something he could think of when he needed to. They were both safe, as far from the base as they could possibly be. They were just within reach of Lucy Gray and the Covey. No one would be able to get to them. Even if he wasn’t there, they would be safe. 

He was nearly reluctant to leave though finally moved to, settling the book back into the basket. He made sure each step was quiet and careful, so as to not stir either of them as he made his way back toward the back porch. It’d be where Lucy Gray was, he had no doubt. It was where they’d find the most privacy without waking them. 

It was the exact spot he found her, curled up in her rocking chair. Her hands were wrapped protectively around herself like she was trying all she could to keep her safe. That her arms could be enough to keep those she loved upright. “You shouldn’t have read that.” 

“They need to be reminded, Sugar, people aren’t all nice.” He moved to shut the door behind him, letting out a sigh as he sat in his own chair beside her. His gaze fell onto where his gun and helmet had been picked up and propped against the post. His vest was tucked against it, waiting for him to take them and disappear once more. “It’s just a silly fairy tale.”

“One that gives them nightmares. Ones you don’t have to deal with,” she spoke, a sharpness in her words. Like it’d slipped before she had realized, tilting her head back with a frown. Her eyes squeezed closed, taking a deep breath. “That wasn’t fair.” 

“It’s okay.” He knew it wasn’t easy. Even if she sat there and promised that it was, that they were just fine, to not worry about them, he always would. He’d always want to try and fix things, even if he just couldn’t. 

The two of them sat in silence for far longer than he would like. He hated nights like this, where one of them would be so worked up and nothing would bring them back down. Lucy Gray wouldn’t be able to relax and likely hadn’t since the moment she’d left the Base that afternoon. 

Before he could question that, he heard the breath that left her, followed by a rushed-out question. “What happened with AJ earlier?”

“We brushed his teeth?” He asked, confusion on his features as he turned to look at her. The boy had seemed fine going to bed without much of a complaint. 

“No.” Her head shook as she looked at him. “Why was he so scared of you in that stupid uniform? What happened this morning?”

What was he even supposed to say? That he’d yelled at them before he’d realized it was them? That he had been so caught up dealing with that asshole that he’d lashed out at their son? That he’d seen genuine fear in the little boy’s face? The kind of fear he used to have when his father would get angry at his age? That their daughter had made the comment that she had? 

“Yeah, what happened this morning?” He repeated. “Why were they all the way up at the base by themselves? What were you doing up there? You know better than to drag them up there, especially on your own. It’s reckless.” 

Maybe that was a stretch. The kids had been safe in the end. But something could have happened. They could have gotten in a lot more trouble if it hadn’t been him who had dealt with them. Not all of the Peacekeepers cared for kids being around, rather wanting them as far from them as they could. It could be dangerous. Something could have happened while they were playing and Lucy Gray had just left them there. 

He knew he’d just been getting himself more and more worked up the longer he sat there. That reminder of their son’s eyes was stuck in his mind, burned in like a brand that would haunt him. It was all too much for them both. It wasn’t fair. He knew that. This time of year was always the worst, the tensions were high and the knowledge of what was waiting for them at the end of the weekend always seemed to loom. 

“I yelled.” That was softening it, a bit. “I was in my uniform and I yelled. Not just at him. I didn’t know they were even there,” he explained, his jaw clenched as he breathed. “I scared him. Birdie looked like she was ready to punch me through the fence for it. It was stupid. And I’m going to make it up to them both the second I can. After next week. I’ll be able to be here. We have to get through the Games.” 

The sound that left Lucy Gray was the closest to a sob as she’d allow herself. It was clear from how it sounded that she was trying to hide it and keep it away. As his eyes fell onto her, the sight broke his heart. 

She was trembling, her fingers curled up in the fabric of her dress around her bump. Her head was down like she was trying to make herself as small as she possibly could. As if she squeezed herself small enough, she would disappear from sight. That maybe she would be safe far away from how life was. 

“Hey.” His voice was soft as he moved out of his chair. He settled on the porch in front of her on his knees, his fingers reaching to her face. He was as gentle as he could be, trying to catch her attention. “Lucy Gray. Sugar.” The name barely caused her to lift her head, meeting those pretty brown eyes that just looked so sad. They were filled with tears, some already starting to slip out. “What happened?” He could fix it. He’d do whatever he had to. “‘Cause if it’s that asshole, I promise, I’m taking care of it. He’s not going to bother you again.” 

“It’s not just him.” Her voice was strained in her own throat, far from the beautiful melody it usually carried. “I can’t do it.”

His brow furrowed, watching as one of her trembling hands moved to reach into the pocket of her dress. There was a crumbled-up envelope inside of her fist, a quiet offer out to him that was greeted with another sniffle. 

A letter? It just wasn’t something that happened to the people of the district. The Peacekeepers could get letters and packages any time they liked, ones that were likely inspected long before they arrived. He’d get mail from Tigris most weeks and Ma Plinth twice a month. The soft reminders of how life once was. How life never would be again. But it wasn’t some treasure from either of them. Scrawled along the envelope was a familiar handwriting, one that made him sick to his stomach to even catch sight of again. 

Lucy Gray Baird. District 12 Victor.

He looked back up to her before he reached to open up the letter. He could feel her shaking against him, adjusting his touch on her. “I’m right here.” One hand moved to settle along her hand, running his thumb along her wrist, soothing as he could be. 

Lucy Gray Baird,

I would first like to congratulate you on your victory during the 10th Hunger Games. The 10th Hunger Games continues to be the most talked about and celebrated to date, filled with talk of controversies and gossip. The win by you and your mentor was one for the history books and one that is pointed to when trying to better the Games each year. We have learned greatly in the years since to ensure the results are valid and well-earned. The 10th Games should have had no Victor, a demonstration to the Districts of what happens when they lash out. You are lucky to have survived the Games and I expect that you are grateful that you did. 

As we near a milestone of the 20th Games, we are always looking to improve and grow what the Games are capable of being and what they represent. Nearly every District has a Victor that has the ability to represent them. The last seven years' worth of Games have created Victors that were worthy of the title. We, of the Capitol, believe that it is only time for the Districts to pull their weight when it comes to the Games. 

Even though you have won your own does not mean that they are over. 

We are expecting you to arrive alongside the tributes of your District this Monday after the Reaping. You, as well as an escort and your tributes, will be staying in the Capitol until the end of the Games and the celebration that follows the Victory. 

You will be providing mentorship to the tributes from District 12 for this year and every year to come. This rule has been set until there is another Victor from your District or your last breath, whichever comes first. It is solely on you in this position to earn a victory with your tributes. 

This position does not come easily. One must be able to put away feelings and understand that there can only be one Victor. Any information or attempts regarding cheating or trying to disrupt the Games will result in immediate punishment. This position is not one to be taken lightly and is a privilege for you to have. 

You do have the ability to deny this role and ignore this responsibility. 

It is my understanding that this is the final year that a member of your “Covey” will be eligible for the Games. This is an accomplishment to celebrate and I'm sure Maude Ivory is feeling relieved. But a celebration should not be had until Monday afternoon when the train carrying you and the tributes leaves the station in District 12. 

I am expecting to see a Baird in the Capitol for the 18th Hunger Games. Which one it will be is your own decision to make. 

The Capitol is waiting with bated breath for another song from the Songbird of Panem.

Dr. Volumnia Gaul

Head Gamemaker

Coriolanus could feel his frown grow, eyes scanning the paper as he tried to wrap around it. It'd walked around the work of a threat, one that could be waved off if shoved in anyone else's face. One that had clearly sent Lucy Gray into a freefall. 

“I'm gonna take care of this,” he started, lifting his gaze to look at her. She'd been holding it together as long as she could, it seemed. She'd been around the kids, around the Covey, around Maude Ivory, and had to keep it together. It wasn't something she could share with any of them. The weight of it was on her shoulders and it was making her crumble under it all. “I don't want you to worry about this.” 

“You can't do anything,” she whispered, rubbing her eyes. “You can't. We can't.” There was a bit of a gasp of a breath at the idea. “It's me or it's Maude Ivory. I can't…” she shook her head at the thought. “I have to go. I can't stay and risk her life.”

“You can't go like this,” he reasoned, his hands moving to stuff the letter back into the envelope. “You're already too on edge and at risk, this is going to send you over the edge. It could just be an empty threat.” 

“I'm not losing her.” Her voice was decisive and stern, nearly, trying to keep herself as steady as she could. “I can't lose her. And I doubt that woman does anything empty, Coriolanus. She's gonna keep that word.” 

Coriolanus hoped more than anything that she was wrong. That it was some sort of scare tactic, something to get exactly what she wanted from it all. But he knew better. It'd be the exact shit the woman would pull. Especially if it got the views up for the damn Games. “I'm gonna see what I can do about this,” he breathed, squeezing her fingers in his touch. “Somehow. It says an escort. Maybe I can talk Hoff into it. Or something.” 

He reached up to touch against her cheek, his thumb brushing away the tears that were staining her soft skin. Her sweet face leaned into the touch, trying to bury herself away from all of it. 

“It's going to be okay.” 

“You can't promise me that.” She sounded so broken, so small, so unlike herself. She was normally so bold, so entirely present in the world. A bird filled with a beautiful song meant for the world to her. “Not this time.” 

He shifted, moving to bring her head in close with the soft curl of his fingers in her hair. He pressed their foreheads together, gentle as he could manage to be with her. “I am going to do everything I can to keep us safe. To keep our family safe. All of us.” It was the same stern and soothing he always tried to be in moments like this. 

Her eyes closed tightly, likely to fight back the tears that were threatening to spill again. Her head nodded quickly, the same way she had that night at the Hob all those years ago. Terrified. Scared. Needing to be protected.

“Ma!” The shout from inside of the house had him nearly jumping out of his skin. It was all too familiar, a faint echo of the voice that haunted him in the back of his mind. It took everything in him to keep still, to not tense and panic in search of the sound. 

She took a deep breath, doing her best to pull herself together. It was almost terrifying to see how quickly she seemed to fall back into what she needed to be. Her eyes were still puffy, the reminder of the mess she was, but she plastered that smile on her lips. A look if anyone glanced at her, himself included, they likely wouldn't think much was wrong. A role she had to play, to keep up with the ones around her. 

“You should go, I've got him,” she assured, using his touch as he stood to help manage her way to her feet. 

He moved to bring her in close with a gentle touch to her cheek. He pecked her lips, sweet as he could manage, just a reminder there for her. “I'm gonna try and take care of this.” He promised, pulling away to let her go. His attention turned to the stacked items, moving to slip the vest back on. 

“I know you will.” Her voice was soft as he watched her disappear into the house. He was sure of the sight he'd find inside. Lucy Gray wrapped around their kids, soothing and promising them everything in the world that they were safe. She'd promise they were taken care of, that nothing and no one could touch a single hair on their head. 

But now he wasn't so sure how true any of that was. 

Chapter Text

Coriolanus hadn't been able to come close to focus throughout the night. He roamed around the Seam, far too distracted for his good. The look on Lucy Gray's face hadn't left his mind, the way she'd been shaking, how tucked in on herself. 

The way she had just so quickly pushed it all away. The way that it was so much more clear at that moment how easily she could hide just how her brain was rushing. She'd been dealing with it since the morning, having to be completely silent and go about her day as if all was right. 

The fear in her eyes was a kind of fear he hadn't seen in years. A kind of fear he had done all he could to keep from ever appearing again. He couldn't stop everything but he could try. Whatever he could do, in whatever way, he did. But he couldn't always be there. He couldn't always fix things.

But he was going to try like hell to do what he could. 

The words of the letter had been swirling in his mind. The way that Dr. Gaul had so simply threatened without a worry. She truly gave Lucy Gray no other choice in all of it. There was no denying that she'd choose her family over anything no matter what. Especially when it came to keeping them safe, she'd been fighting for them since they'd gotten in Twelve and she still was. 

He hadn't said a word as he made his way back to the base, quiet outside of a soft grunt toward Smiley in passing. 

He didn’t even make it back to the barracks before he’d turned toward the administrative office. The sun wasn’t even up yet and the first call to wake hadn’t even started yet. Outside of the officers who were on guard from the night before, the base was quiet and would be for a while longer. 

It was likely his only chance he’d be able to even try and have a conversation. Or attempt to convince the man otherwise. There was only so much that he knew could be done, especially when it came to the safety of the Covey on top of it all. If he got too involved in the situation, he was sure he’d never hear the end of it from Lucy Gray of how he shouldn’t have. But whatever it took, whatever he could attempt to make it easier on her if she was so dead set on going to the Capitol.

“Ms. Laurel!” He was sure his voice was far too cheery as he made his way into the front of the office. “Beautiful morning, isn’t it?”

“Sergeant Snow.” A sigh left the older woman, one that already sounded like she was tired of whatever reason he had shown his face this early. “What do I owe the pleasure this early? Your shift just ended, did it not?” Almost hopeful, it sounded like. 

“It did,” he agreed, pausing in front of the woman's desk. “Just need to have a chat with Commander Hoff.” He offered a smile, something that was all too charming. “You're wearing your hair differently today.” 

The older woman seemed flustered enough before she shook her head in response. “You can have a chat after breakfast,” she offered. “And a rest. You have been out all night, Sergeant Snow.” 

“It won't take long. Won't even realize I was here, it'll be so quick.” He knew himself that it was a lie, and the look from the woman seemed to know just the same. “Ms. Laurel, I’m not even tired. So don't worry about me. And it's urgent.” 

“He hasn't had his coffee yet this morning.” It was clear from the smell in the office that it was brewing. The man likely hadn't been there for longer than a handful of minutes, if that. 

“Perfect.” He moved at the thought, making his way over to the coffee pot. “I can take it to him for you. Take it easy this morning. Four sugars, right? No cream.” He'd made it far more than he'd like to admit from moments bursting in the door just like this. His hand moved to reach for the mug that he always saw on the man’s desk, settling it in front of him. 

A sigh moved through the older woman from her spot at her desk. She could easily usher him out the door, but the slight pause gave him some sort of hope. “Two. He's cutting down.” 

He bit back his own grin at the admission, nodding his head as he reached for the sugar once he'd gotten the coffee poured. “I would have been in real trouble then,” he offered with a laugh, turning in his spot with the mug in his hand. Kind, charming, someone who was darling enough to butter up the older woman. “You're a real lifesaver, Ms. Laurel. I'll owe you one.” 

“You already owe me about seven,” she reminded, though there was a laugh in her voice, waving him off. “You better make it quick.” 

“Yes, ma'am,” he agreed, sending her a wink before he made his way through the set of doors. His foot shut the door behind him, eyes falling to the man at his desk. 

“Laur-” A sigh left the man as he lifted his gaze from his papers and landed on him instead. “Sergeant Snow.” 

He made his way over to the desk, setting the mug in front of him before he straightened himself up. He moved to attention, only settling once he was put to ease, nodding his head at the sight of the older man.

Commander Hoff had only grown in age over the years, and it all seemed to finally start to catch up to him. A man that was growing tired, the grays in his hair becoming more prominent with each meeting that they had. A man who had only grown in his trust for him over the years, something he was hoping more than anything he could use now. “I was hoping I wouldn’t have to see you until at least lunch.”

“Much too important to wait until lunchtime, sir.” It always was. Every time he needed to discuss something felt that way but especially this. 

“I had a feeling you’d be showing up after yesterday.” He already knew, didn’t he? He was sure the Commander knew far more than he let slip, that he let more things slip past than he’d ever admit to. 

“Yes, sir.” He watched as the man gestured to one of the other chairs at a separate desk, moving to pick it up and bring it back over to his. He sat once he was permitted to, straightening himself out, tilting his chin at the thought. Confident and sure. That’s what he had to be. If this could go even close to how he was hoping that it would, he had to seem like he knew just what he was doing. “I understand that there have been some orders from the Capitol for one of our citizens.” It always felt cold, speaking of his love as if she were just… anyone else. “For our Victor, specifically. One that I do not believe she is in any state of being able to complete without causing her medical issues.”

The man nodded as he listened, taking a sip of his coffee with a pointed look. It said all it needed to without him having to speak a word. Continue. 

“There has to be something that can be done to keep her here and not cause any punishment on her Covey as well.” He couldn’t be the cause of Maude Ivory being pulled for the Games. He couldn’t do that to any of them. 

“There isn’t.” 

“That’s great to hear, I was thi-” He started before the words seemed to hit him, causing him to pause. His brow furrowed as he ran through them in his mind. There isn’t. “What do you mean, sir?”

A sigh left the older man as he settled his mug down on his desk. His hand reached across to run through a pile of papers, tugging out a stack of folded-up ones. It was thicker than Lucy Gray’s, likely in extreme detail about just what was expected for Reaping Day. “I agree with you.” That was a good sign. The man reached for his glasses with his other hand, settling them on the bridge of his nose as he flipped through the pages. “I don’t believe we should be sending her. And not just because of her current state.”

The sound of the letter being flipped through filled the room. 

“I’ve spoken to… several other Commanders across Panem. We all seem to agree that… our Victors have earned their peace. But, that is not what the Capitol believes and we must follow as they lead.” It hadn’t been the first time he had seen Commander Hoff have a distaste for something sent from the Capitol. It was often shown on his face rather than spoken aloud. “It is for the wellbeing of us all.”

“For the wellbeing of Lucy Gray? Sending her there? Really?” It slipped out before he could stop himself, quieting at the look that was sent his way. He had to keep his cool, his calm, the last thing he needed was trouble. 

“Everyone.” He cleared his throat, his finger seeming to have found the line that he was searching for in the letter. “If there are no issues and the Victor represents their District appropriately and proudly, the District will be rewarded.” He glanced back up at him for a moment before returning to the letter. “As there is a new incentive program that has been implemented since your District’s Victor won, the District will gain these incentives in back pay.” 

It was all making sense. Even if a Victor didn’t want to on their own, there was a form of a strongarm to tug them back in. The safety of their family, their life, and the good of the District. There was little one could do to refuse to perform. 

“Every citizen of the District will receive a year’s worth of food shipments for as many years as there are Victors. District Twelve will receive one year's worth of food for each citizen, shipped monthly and delivered fresh. The District will also receive monthly shipments of other prizes, including oil and clothing.” That alone would be worth it for anyone. That alone likely would have been enough for Lucy Gray with the heart that she had. “As well as repairs done for the local schools and new tools for mining, the District will also gain funding for their Peacekeeper garrison to continue to grow.” 

It was all a game. It’s all it had ever been. Now, it seemed, they were giving more reasons for the Districts to win. Even more reason to try and send the best of the best to the Capitol for the chance to win.

“As for the Victor, she will be rewarded greatly for her act of service in this new role, if she so chooses to accept it. If she does not, there will be punishments.” There was no other option. Lucy Gray had no other options. “The Victor will be rewarded with monetary compensation for work as a mentor. She will also be rewarded the same salary in back pay, for each year that has passed since her Games, dependent on time spent in the Capitol if called upon.” 

If called upon? If they ever felt some need for Lucy Gray to appear, for whatever little show that they wanted to have. 

“A Victor's Village is to be built in the District, as well. This will include housing and will begin once the 18th Games are completed. Any Victor of District Twelve, past or future, will be moved in once it is finished. The Victor can and will be evicted if their actions are seen as damaging or dismissive by the Capitol.” He was sure there were far too many rules she would have to follow. “The Victor is to be an extension of the Capitol and should behave as such. Punishments will be given to the Victor as well as the District for any disobedience. For the well-being of the District, it is highly recommended that the Victor be on her best behavior and do as she is instructed.” 

Commander Hoff sighed as he sat the letter down, shifting his glasses onto the desk. The look on his face alone said exactly what he was sure his mouth wouldn’t. He wouldn’t want to have to enforce any of it. But he would have to. 

“Does she know about all of those?” He asked, clearing his throat. He needed to look like he had the smallest of clues of just what was happening. That he’d simply heard it in passing more than anything else. 

“She does. That was part of our conversation yesterday.” She hadn’t spoken a word about most of it. But she was sure that her head had been too full and there was only so much she could manage to get out in her panic. “I was hoping no one would be aware of it just while we’re sorting things out.” 

“She was out on the porch during my shift,” he answered, far too confident in his lie. “She mentioned it in passing. She was having a hard time.”

A breath of a chuckle moved through the Commander, sure the man saw right through him. “I’m sure.” He breathed out, reaching over for his coffee. “This is something you will have to adjust to when you take over this position. No matter if you dislike it or not. You focus on the good of the whole, not one. No matter how unfair that may seem for the one.”

“Yes, sir.” It’d likely be the hardest part of it all. Especially when it came to Lucy Gray. It was bound to happen, sooner or later to the sounds of it. But that didn’t make it any easier to accept. “There’s an escort needed, isn’t there?”

“Just a passing mention, was it?” The man asked with a chuckle as he took a sip of his coffee. “They believe individuals like her may have an easier time with a District Peacekeeper they may be familiar with. Rather than a Capitol one, especially ones who have come in contact with them in the past in… far from kind ways.”

“Who are you sending with her?” Coriolanus knew the answer likely shouldn’t be himself. But there weren’t many that he would trust with her as it were. “If you’ve thought about it.”

“I have plenty of options.” He did. Any of them could go. But fuck, Coriolanus didn’t want most of them to. “It could be an opportunity for a newer officer. There are plenty that want to prove themselves. Private Barker, for one.” 

The name caused his brow to furrow, taking a moment before it seemed to register, a small sigh moving through him. “Suds is…” he started. “He’s a great kid. He seems to have a bright future if he keeps how he is. But he’s just now getting used to doing patrol in the market on his own. The Capitol has a lot more to take on than Twelve. He has to be far more aware.”

“A learning opportunity, wouldn’t it?” 

“Sure. But not on his own. He’ll get there eventually. Just not ready this weekend.” It was the truth, at least. It would just take time. “He still gets blackout at the Hob when we have a night off. The alcohol out in the Capitol will knock him out the whole week. It wouldn’t be the move I’d make.”

Commander Hoff made a noise in acknowledgment as he moved to open a drawer in his desk, pulling out a file. “Sergeant Perch, then?”

Coriolanus could feel the way his stomach lurched at the mention of the man’s name. That was the last person that needed to be anywhere around her. Especially alone. “Kindly, sir, that would be the worst idea that you might have ever had.”

“And why’s that?” He asked, moving to grab his glasses once more as he flicked through the file. “High marks, top of his squad, wanting to prove himself. He’s eyeing the Major position just as you are.”

“He may be but he’s an ass, sir.” That was the kindest he could put it. What he really thought of the man, if spoken aloud, would likely get him the worst of punishments that could be imagined. “Especially to Miss. Baird. Yesterday alone, he was threatening and taunting her as she left here. It’s already a stressful situation for her, he wouldn’t be there to take care of her. He would make it worse.”

“That nasty bruise he has wouldn’t be a good look either.” Fuck. “And his nose is a bit broken, it seemed a bit crooked when we had a conversation. He doesn’t quite look professional enough for the role.”

“Sir, yo-”

He was quieted as the man lifted his hand to silence him, swallowing as he lowered his head. “I didn’t realize just how slippery the gravel outside of the Mess Hall was. And that he was that clumsy.”

“It’s a real mystery, sir.” 

“I need you to understand something, Sergeant Snow,” the man started, pulling out a paper from the file and holding it up. He could just make out what the form was. An official complaint, from the looks of it, and he was sure just who had filed it. “You have a future in this, long term, you and I both have known this since your first month here.” 

“Yes, sir.”

“This.” He waved the paper in his fingers with a scowl. “This is exactly what keeps someone like you from getting that future. This is a paper trail of an issue. We’ve discussed it countless times, if there’s an issue, you let me deal with it. Not yourself.” 

“You didn’t hear him, sir.” 

“I didn’t, you’re correct.” The man settled the paper down on the desk in front of him. “And because of that and that it wasn’t dealt with correctly, all that would be seen by anyone is this complaint. That you attacked with no reason.” 

“I had plenty of reasons to have done so, sir. It’s the least he deserved.” He shouldn’t be admitting to it. By any means. That was the last thing that he should be saying aloud. 

A sigh left Commander Hoff as he looked him over. “You need to be making better choices.” Disappointed. Entirely. “If this is how rash you will be, how can you be trusted to make decisions as they’re needed in this position.” 

It was a fair point. Even if he didn’t want to admit to it. 

“You can have your emotions. And your hatred, all you like. But in this role, no one needs to know it. Is that understood?”

“Yes, sir.” 

“What’s your suggestion?” He asked, looking over to him as he moved to stand. “For the escort. I’m assuming you. Convince me why.”

“I’m not an ass.” Maybe not the most appropriate reason. “Miss. Baird isn’t terrified of me. I know my way around the Capitol. I know my way in the Mentorship for the Games, I got her back here. We’ve worked together to get her back here. She’ll be safest with me.” It wasn’t often he would admit it aloud, that either of them would. “If there’s any chance of one of the tributes making it back home. She needs it to be me with her. She’s going to be too overwhelmed on her own.”

Commander Hoff was quiet for a long while, seeming to be contemplating his words. He was just hoping that he would understand. That he would agree. Smiley, Beanpole, or Bug were the only others he would trust to that level with her. But he would be the ideal choice. 

“I can show that I am more than capable. That I have earned the Major position and that I am capable of becoming a Commander one day.” That was the goal. He’d have more freedom and more chances to provide for his family properly. 

Commander Hoff turned to look back at him, a sigh moving through him once more. “I’ll submit you as an option. It has to be approved by the Capitol first.” It was better than nothing. Anyone but that fucker. “Tell your Squad they’ll be off for the weekend, I’m sure there’ll be quite the event at the Hob. I expect everyone at 0300 on Monday, we’ll have to prepare for the Reaping.” 

“Yes, sir.” It was a surprise in itself. A welcome one though. “Thank you, sir.”

“If you are approved.” When he was, he was promising himself that. “I’m expecting nothing but professionalism. I look past… plenty out here. If I hear one word assuming anything, and I mean anything, about the two of you. Anything that makes it sound like my Peacekeepers do not follow the rules of the Capitol is reported back. I will no longer look past it. Is that understood?”

“Understood, sir.” 

“It’s your one chance, Snow.” The air was filled quickly with the sound of a machine shredding the complaint that had been clasped in his hand. The one complaint that had ever filled his file went just as quickly. “Do not make me regret this decision.” 

He moved to stand, nodding his head in understanding as he saluted the man. He knew he was lucky. He had earned it over the years, going out of his way to ensure that he had found his way into the position he had. It had been years of climbing and working and missing out. And finally, it felt like it was worth it. “Thank you, sir. Enjoy your breakfast.”

It didn’t take long for him to cross paths with Smiley, who had been heading to the showers to get one in before the barracks fully was woken. If anyone was capable of spreading any news the quickest, it would be him, who happily agreed and waved him off with a promise to see him at the Hob.

He’d grabbed his bag out of the barracks, quiet as he ever was, slipping out of the base without much issue and without many eyes on him. No one ever seemed to ask or wonder, though he was sure that plenty assumed just where he would disappear to on days off. 

The path to the house was quiet and empty, through the edge of the fields that he had taken just the night before. It wouldn’t disturb anyone as he traveled and kept him from being caught by the few that were stirring to make it to the market before it got too hot out. It would be miserable by the time Monday rolled around, the kind of weather that would make his uniform feel like it was sticking to his skin. 

The house was quiet, likely the quietest it had ever been in the morning. Normally, the kids were up and running around by the time the sun was rising. But the day before had likely taken its toll, if he had to guess, one that would lead to a later start. 

He easily got the door unlocked, settling his bag by the door before he worked his boots off. He was mindful of each step, of each movement, not wanting to be what disturbed the peace of the house. Lucy Gray needed the rest and if he could give it to her, he’d do what he could. He made his way toward their bedroom. If he could even call it that. Theirs . He’d likely slept in it less than the kids had over the years, only able to steal so many nights away without having to check-in. But he took whatever he could. 

His gaze fell onto the sight of Lucy Gray where she was curled up in the bed. Even in her sleep, she looked on edge and uneasy. It wasn’t the usually peaceful sight that he came across. He was sure the pregnancy wasn’t helping, likely having spent half of the night trying to just get comfortable. 

He made his way over to the other side of the bed, the part where she wasn’t taking up most of the space. He was careful with each movement as he climbed into the bed beside her, slow and gentle so as to not disturb her. He could lay there forever just looking at her. He wanted to. He had already memorized every detail of her face when they had sat across from each other at the zoo with the bars in between. He had been lucky enough to see each change to that perfect face. It had been all he could have dreamed about that night and every night since all those years ago. 

He laid his head against the pillow, searching over her face as she slept. He watched each breath, each twitch of her nose, each sign of discomfort. He always felt he could read her like a book, tell just what was running through that mind of hers. But now he didn't feel so sure. The one thing he was sure of was that he could watch her sleep for hours and be content. 

He was almost sure that he had, as the sun kept coming up and peeking through the window. The birds were starting to make all the noise they always did. Their morning song was nothing compared to the song that would usually echo through the home. 

As exhausted as his body felt, he didn't want to look away. He wanted to be right there, watch those perfect eyes blink awake. There was always sleepiness, a quiet, the few moments of peace before the world fell too heavy on her shoulders. 

He watched her as he heard the soft whine that left her as her body started to stretch. She was trying to get more comfortable, but from the way she moved, it was clear she was starting to stir. His fingers adjusted, one hand reaching over to press back some of her curls from her face. 

Her nose twitched, her brow furrowing as she seemed to register the touch to her hair. Those gorgeous eyes blinked open, slow and careful, sleepy as could be. It took far too long for her to seem to come into focus, blinking a few times to take in the sight of him. 

“Morning.” His voice was rough and thick, and he needed sleep. But all he wanted was to stay awake, to steal as much time as they could together. 

Her face softened as she smiled, nuzzling into his touch. “Mornin’.” Her voice was just as thick and sweet as honey. “I ain't supposed to have a man in my bed this morning. My man's ‘pposed to be working.” 

“Your man's not working,” he chuckled, pushing back her curls from her face. “Get to stay home for a few days. If you have space in your bed, at least.” 

A hum moved through her like she was truly thinking it over. “Our bed's pretty full with me and our little bird,” she teased. “But if you can find a way to fit, you're welcome to.” 

Coriolanus smiled at the thought, closing the small gap between them. It was easier said than done, running his fingers down to her cheek. It was gentle as could be, sweet and small kisses shared between them. “I'll make it work,” he soothed. “C'mere.” 

The adjustment was easy, shifting to sit up in the bed, and settling his back against the pillows. Lucy Gray moved into him, tucking into his side. Her head settled against his chest, nuzzling her way to his collarbone. One arm wrapped around her back, the other shifting to tuck underneath her bump. It was the gentlest of movements, enough to take some of the pressure of the weight off of her. It was enough to cause a sigh to leave her, relaxing into him. 

He pressed his lips to the top of her head, just settling in against her. It was peaceful, as peaceful as they could manage to have there. They just had to take what they could at that point. 

“I talked to Hoff.” His words broke the soft humming that had been moving through her, watching as her head tilted back to look at him. She was wide-eyed as ever, searching, the kind of quiet that always threw him. “If she wasn't threatened, you'd still go, wouldn't you?” 

Another sigh left her, one that was far less content. She lowered her gaze, tucking back in against his chest. Her fingers curled up in the fabric of his shirt. “People are starving out here, Coriolanus. You don't see the kids and their mamas dropping them off. Some of ‘em, that's the only time they eat. Someone's gotta do something.” 

“It shouldn't have to fall on you, Sugar-” 

“But it does.” She was working herself up, there was no doubt about that. It was the exact opposite of what she needed to do, at that point. “And it's Maude Ivory. Or our babies. I'm not losing anyone else. You're not going to talk me out of it, Coriolanus.” 

Stubborn. She was as stubborn as could be every time. But she always stood on what she felt, feet planted in every decision she made. She cared too much about others. She felt every decision she was part of. She had a heart like no other. 

“I'm not going to,” he promised her, dropping another kiss on the top of her head. “I'm not.” He couldn't even attempt to if he wanted to. She'd never let him even try. “I think I'm going with you.” 

“What?”

“You need an escort. I'm capable,” he offered, shifting to press another kiss. 

“Are they going to be safe here? Without us?” She sounded so small, scared, that maybe they would come back and they would be gone. 

His head nodded, knowing he'd make good on it. “I'll talk to Smiley at the Hob. He'll keep an eye out, make sure none of them come out this way.” He rubbed along her back, soothing as he could try and be. “They're going to be safe. Just like you are.” 

She seemed unsure about it, for a long moment before she nodded. She tucked back in against him, her fingers still fidgeting with the fabric. There was a quiet sniffle, one he was nearly sure she was trying to hide as she buried away into his shirt. 

He could just hold her close, his own soft hum moving through him. She was far from filled with joy, or music, far from the girl that she could usually try and be. It was some little song, one he'd never learned the name of, but had always seemed to hang around their home. 

His eyes had just barely closed before they had shot back open as the noise of the front door opening sounded through the house. There was a thudding of footsteps, small and quick, the exact sound of the kids on a mission. 

Had he missed them having gotten up? Had he just been too caught up to even recognize that they had? 

“Mama!” AJ's voice echoed through the house as he made his way toward the bedroom. It was enough to cause Lucy Gray to shift, to settle herself better upright next to him. 

A soft gasp sounded from the doorway as his gaze fell onto the sight. There the two of them stood, eyes wide as could be. They weren't in their pajamas, the ones that they had been tucked into bed with. They looked ready for the lake, even as early as it was, their coverups for the walk over what he was sure were their swimsuits. 

“Dad!” Auralee Pearl's voice nearly boomed, all but launching herself across the room and into the bed with them. AJ was quick to follow, making his way right behind her. “You goin’ with us?” 

“Please!” 

His head nodded, giving them both a smile as he looked them over. “Of course I am,” he promised. “And I get to come to the Hob too. I'm all yours for a while.” 

That seemed enough to please them both, a mess of words that were rushing out and overlapping to where he couldn't even come close to understanding a word they were saying. It was the kind of noise that he would always far rather have than the silence that filled the barracks at night. 

His gaze just barely lifted, his attention caught by some movement in the door frame. There was Tam Amber, some silent conversation between him and Lucy Gray. It was one he was sure he'd never know the story behind, something she'd assure him all was well. Something he just wasn't sure of anymore. Something that made him a bit uneasy. 

But he just had to trust her. They had to trust each other. Just like they had for all of these years. It was the only way they'd get through it all on the other side. They would just have to take it one breath at a time. 

Chapter Text

The walk out to the lake was never one that he loved. He was sure he'd made the hike more times than anything, more times than he could count. And it hadn't mattered how many times he had done it, he still despised most of the walk. Especially in the heat. 

Even if they could all do the walk by now with their eyes closed, it didn't make it something he enjoyed. There were too many bugs, it was too hot and some days they'd have to walk home in a summer storm. He'd run into too many tree branches, tripped a few too many times, and grumbled every step.

He'd stayed next to Lucy Gray’s side, who was moving slower than normal. She took more breaks than normal, looking more and more miserable the longer they walked. It was the first time she'd been pregnant through the Summer, and she seemed to be feeling every bit of it. 

The kids had been running laps around them as if they had endless energy. They'd run between where the rest of the Covey was ahead and back to them. Any thought, anything that seemed to run past their mind was brought to their attention.

They took turns asking for piggyback rides, the other bouncing along beside them as they walked. It was the kind of energy he wished he could still have, wishing more than anything that he could just rest. 

Maude Ivory had looped her way back a few times with offers to take anything that Lucy Gray tried to carry. She'd helped a few times to get the kids up on his shoulders. The exact same way she had begged the first few summers he had been out in Twelve until she’d gotten too tall. 

“Finally.” Lucy Gray was nearly breathless as they started down the last hill toward the lake and cabin. “You can just roll me back in the barrow.”

“I can do that,” he chuckled, moving to work AJ down off of his shoulders as he felt him wiggling around. “Go on. Don’t get in yet,” he reminded, watching as the little boy bounded off after his sister. “You gonna get in?”

Her head shook at the question, giving him a smile. “Just wanna lay down,” she admitted. He shouldn't be surprised, even in the heat, Lucy Gray was a lover of all things sunshine. “I can watch from my blanket if that's okay.” 

“That's perfect,” he promised, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Can take a nap too, even, I think we'll be good for a little while.”

Her head nodded, taking his offered out hand to make their way down along the hill after the kids. “Hey, Maude Ivory-” 

“I've got it,” the younger girl started, bringing over the yellow blanket. It was starting to show its age, more and more little rips and frays and a few stains that she hadn't been able to get out. “Here?” 

“Perfect,” Lucy Gray agreed, watching as the girl spread out the blanket for her. “You're so good to me, Sweet Bird.” 

The girl's eyes rolled fondly at the nickname, shaking her head as she moved. It was as gentle as could be, once she had the blanket down, helping her slip her dress off from the gentle tug up over her head. “Someone's gotta help take care of Mama Bird.” She reached to tug a bit at the crochet top, helping adjust it along her body.

Coriolanus offered his hand, helping her get laid down on the blanket, watching as she wiggled to get comfortable. “You good?” 

It took her a few moments before she nodded as she seemed to settle finally. She looked as beautiful as she could, as close to peaceful as she could manage. 

He pressed a kiss to her knuckles before he let go of her hand, watching the way that she moved. It was as gentle as could be, the way that she wrapped up around her bump, running along her stretched skin. “If you need anything, just call for it, okay?”

“Got it,” she promised, giving him a thumbs up before she let her eyes flicker closed. There was a soft hum that he could just make out, one he was sure was helping soothe her. 

He watched her a few moments longer, not able to help his smile at the sight of her. He could see just how exhausted she was, just soaking up the sunlight shining on her. 

“Dad!” 

“Coming!” He called back, making his way over toward where the rest of the Covey was. 

AJ was wiggling about in front of Barb Azure as she tried to get sunscreen rubbed into his skin. “It's cold!”

“It's almost done,” the older girl sighed, shaking her head as the boy groaned, trying to pull away from her. “I gotta get that sweet little face covered first.” 

“I don't wanna,” AJ grumbled, his lips pressing together in a pout. 

“I got him.” Coriolanus made his way to sit in front of him, looking over to Barb Azure. He offered his hand out to her to take what was left over on her own. 

He didn't miss the look on her face, the hard stare she gave him before she wiped the sunscreen onto his hand before she moved to stand. “Don't forget his ears.” 

He nodded as he settled, reaching to rub against his face. “Give me ten seconds and you're good to go.” It was enough to at least cause the little boy to pause long enough. His hands moved quickly, gentle as he could be as he rubbed the cream into his face, feeling AJ's face scrunch up against him. 

“That's more than ten seconds,” Auralee Pearl's voice sounded beside him, only causing a laugh to leave him. 

“Thank you,” he sighed, shaking his head as he pulled his fingers away. “There, all good. Not so bad, right?”

“Real bad.” AJ, dramatic as ever, something he was sure he took after Lucy Gray, though she would say the same about him. “Can Romeo go for a swim too?” He moved to reach for the tattered old stuffed dog, holding it out in front of him. “P'ease.” 

“I don't think he ever learned how to swim,” he explained softly. “How about you take him over to Mama? She'll take real good care of him while we're swimming.” 

It took the little boy a few moments, looking between the stuffed dog and him before he nodded. “Yeah, okay.” It was a quick step, bounding over to where Lucy Gray was lying. 

His attention turned back to Auralee Pearl, looking her over. “You got some on?” 

“Yep.” 

“No fuss?” He questioned, shifting to stand to his feet. 

“I ain't a baby, Dad.” Her hands settled on her lips, looking up at him with that same stare that he was usually met with by Lucy Gray. 

“Yeah, you're not,” he agreed, ruffling the top of her hair. “Gonna jump in?” 

Her head nodded at the suggestion, looking toward the dock. “Can you go in first?” She asked, looking back toward him. 

He nodded at the request, reaching to nudge against her chin before he offered his hand out for her to take. 

“Can you try and catch me?” She asked, her small feet tapping along the wooden planks. “And actually catch me this time?” 

“That was one time, sweet girl,” he recalled with a chuckle, pausing at the edge of the dock. “Wait just right here.” 

“I won't move!” She promised, planting her feet against the edge just the same, her toes curling up against the wood. 

He chuckled as he moved to slip off of the dock, groaning at the cold of the water. It wouldn't take long for his body to adjust, but the shock of the cold never got any easier. He dipped under the water, taking a few moments before he swam back out, shaking the water from his face. “Ready?” 

“Ready!” She took far too many steps back, trying to get herself enough momentum to make the leap over to him. 

His arms reached out, easily catching her as she jumped into the lake and to him. She was filled with giggles as he spun her around a bit, pressing a few kisses to her face. 

“That might be your best jump yet, Pearlie,” CC called from his spot on the bank. 

“It was real good!” She agreed from her spot in his arms, shifting to float around him and climb up on his shoulders. It was the same way Lucy Gray often would, cuddled in close against his shoulders as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Can I do it again?” 

“Maybe in a little bit,” he soothed, tilting his head to look at her. “Maybe when the rest of them get in.” 

“Okay,” she grumbled, laying her chin on the top of her head as she relaxed against him. “Why's Mama not swimming?” 

“She's tired,” he answered. It was the easiest answer, at least. He was sure her head was spinning like no other trying to think of just what to say to the rest of them. Of how to even explain to their kids what would be happening. They'd done all they could to shield them from the realities of it, outside of the Reaping, which he was far from sure how much they really understood of the tradition. 

“She's always tired lately,” she mumbled, squeezing a bit around his neck where she was wrapped. It was enough to cause a bit of a breath to leave him, shifting his arms to adjust his hold on her. 

“You know your Mama used to do that all the time,” he started. Diversion. Distraction. Anything so she didn't have to sit and worry, if he looked long enough, he’d be met with little furrowed brows. 

“Do what?” 

“Try and drown me out here,” he teased, ticking against her legs under the water to gain a giggle. “First trip out here, she nearly drowned me sitting just like this.” 

“Really?” 

“Mhm,” he hummed, shifting his head to look back at her. “Floated all the way out there and watched CC and Maude Ivory play the pinecone game you two love with Sejanus.” 

He was almost sure that he could still see them if he watched the edge of the bank for too long. And more times than he'd like to admit, he swore the damn birds flying overhead were still playing their voices and laughs. Before the real world had been able to touch them, or that was how it felt.

“Sejanus?” Her voice felt like it echoed in his ears. “Who's that?” 

His mouth felt like it went dry instantly and was near sure he could hear his own heartbeat. It'd been something that slipped out, some fond memory that he'd gotten caught up in. 

He had never been more thankful to be splashed by water as CC and Maude Ivory took off jumping into the lake. It was enough to distract from the question, feeling Auralee Pearl's pigtail braids smack against his shoulders as she tried to get the water out. 

“Wanna try and swim to me?” Maude Ivory asked, holding her hands out. “You're gettin’ real good at it.” 

“Yeah!” She moved to try and climb off of his shoulders, her hands wrapping around his arm as if for leverage. “Can I?” 

“Go for it,” he shrugged, shifting to giving one last little nudge off before watching as she started the swim over to Maude Ivory. CC was as close as could be, following along after her just in case. 

He knew he was lucky. They'd all done everything they could to help out, in more ways than he was sure he completely knew about. The youngest of the Covey were always the first to offer to help get the energy out of the kids. Maude Ivory had stuck next to Lucy Gray as much as she could, still a few nights where she'd go sleep in their bed with her like she had when she was younger. Lucy Gray was just as much her Mama in the terms of the word as anyone.

The older two were a different story but they always had been. Where he knew exactly where he stood with Maude Ivory and CC, he couldn't say the same about them. Tam Amber had always been one of few words, much rather the one that took in everything he saw and spoke when he felt necessary. Barb Azure, on the other hand, made her opinion known since the moment he'd taken the first step on their porch after the night at the Hob. 

And from the look on the eldest of the Covey’s face, she was clearly far from wanting much to do with him. Part of him wondered if that was simply how she looked at everyone who wasn't Covey, but he’d never quite been sure. But some looks were more clearly pointed toward him than others. 

“Dad.” The call of his name turned his attention to where AJ was slowly making his way down the dock. He was cautious as could be like he was worried the wood would give way underneath him. 

“I'm right here,” he assured, making his way a bit closer to the edge of the dock. “Gonna come and swim?” 

His head of dark blond curls nodded, even as he far from stepped closer toward him. “Do I gotta?” 

“No,” he answered, looking up at the little boy. “But you'll have fun once you're in here. You always do. Nothing's going to happen.” 

“I don't know.” There was a bit of a whine in his words, a pout appearing on his lips. “It's gonna be cold.” 

“You'll be fine.” Maybe he was a bit short about it. It was something that he and Lucy Gray had had conversations about before. More times than he would like to admit to. 

The world was far from gentle, something that he and Lucy Gray knew all too well. They'd dealt with the worst that the world had to throw at them. It had a force like no other shoving down on their shoulders. As much as they needed to be safe from it all… at some point, they'd need to be able to fend for themselves. They'd have to learn, eventually, that they couldn't be soft forever or the world would eat them alive. He'd seen it happen too many times and the last thing he wanted was for it to happen to the two of them. 

The world they lived in, especially being stuck out in the District, wasn't one that went easy on anyone. He'd seen the world chew out and spit out anyone that was too gentle, that had too much heart. It'd led to the fear he saw sometimes in Lucy Gray's eyes, in just how uneasy she could be. It'd led to still swearing he could hear the call of Ma from birds out in the Seam at night. It led to the rope swinging from a branch. 

“You just have to jump, I'm right here,” Coriolanus reminded him. “It's nothing to be scared about.”

“I'm not scared.” Another little pout. 

He was sure the last thing he needed to be was frustrated. He was more than aware of that. But some moments he didn't understand it. He'd never been allowed to groan and complain the way that their kids did. The pout would have been wiped away the moment his father looked toward him. He'd been able to take the world on exactly as it came toward him. He just wanted the same for them. 

“You just jump, AJ,” he sighed, holding his arms out to him. “It's not that far.” 

“I don't know.” 

“Make up your mind.” Another bit of a shortness. “You were so excited about going swimming the whole time.”

He was met with a pout, the way that his face screwed up like he was ready to burst into tears. “I don't know.” 

“C'mere.” He made his way closer to the edge of the dock, his fingers reaching to take the little boy's hand. “Right here. You just have to take a step.” 

The motion was enough to cause another whine to leave him, an all too dramatic “no” leaving the boy. It'd been enough to catch the attention of Barb Azure, who got up from her spot. 

“Adam Jet Baird, just get in the water,” he spoke, a bit hard still, but his voice softened more to not catch more attention. “You're making it a much bigger deal than it is.” 

“You are, actually,” Barb Azure's voice sounded from the edge of the dock. She moved to settle on the wood, one arm wrapping around his waist, rubbing along his side. “It's alright, AJ,” Her fingers moved to nearly shove away his own that had been wrapped around AJ's wrist, sending him a hard stare. “Give him some space.” 

A sigh left him as he did just that, if he tried to argue, Barb Azure might just try to drown him. There was enough space between himself and the edge of the dock, watching the little boy as he took a step closer to the older woman. 

“Look,” she started, reaching her hand over to cup some of the water into it. “It's not too cold. It'll feel real nice with how hot it is.” Her words were gentle, even with how harsh her stare was toward Coriolanus. “Try it.” 

It took the little boy a few moments before he did just that, dipping his fingers into the small bit of water. 

“Not so bad, right?” 

“Yeah.” He mumbled, tucking in against her as she slipped the handful of water over his arm. “It's okay.” 

“You want to try it?” 

His head nodded at the question, his wet arm moving to wipe at his eyes. He was sure there were tears trying to fall, which far from surprised him. He cried far more than he'd ever fully understood. 

“I can take him,” he offered, holding his hands back out toward the little boy. 

Barb Azure gave him one look, glancing over him before she cleared her throat. “CC!” 

It caught the younger’s attention, his head turning to look at the two of them. “Yeah?” 

“Come get the bird,” she called, shifting to wrap her hold around AJ beside her. “I'll pass you right over.” 

His head of small curls nodded in agreement from where he was wrapped around Barb Azure. “Mhm.” There was a pause, long enough before he looked back up to her. “What if I want out?” 

“We'll get you right out,” she promised, shifting as CC came past him, sending him a smile before he settled at the edge of the dock. “You just call for me or Tam Amber, yeah?” 

He nodded once more, shifting in her touch as Barb Azure moved to pass him down to CC. The older shifted him in his grip, careful at just keeping his legs in the water for the time being. “Wanna go see Pearlie?” 

“Mhm.” 

CC nodded, adjusting him in his hold as he started back through the water. He'd just gotten taller and stronger, making it easier for him to manage both kids without much problem. 

Coriolanus let out a breath as he watched the two head further into the lake, turning his attention back to Barb Azure. There was the look that she never seemed to wipe away from her face at the sight of him. “What?” 

Her head shook in response, looking back to where Tam Amber was settled next to Lucy Gray on the bank. 

He moved in his spot, making his way closer as he tugged himself up onto the dock. The kids were the safest they would be, and he was nearly sure that he was far from the favorite option of joining in there. “You could have given him to me.” 

“Could've.”

“Completely capable of getting him in the water.” 

“Mhm.” Her face twisted in what he was sure was disbelief before it went back to how it had been. 

“He wanted to get in, he should have just gotten in.” Why he was arguing with her, he still wasn't sure. There wasn't much he could do that would seem to please her. “He's a kid, they change their minds all the time, you don't have to baby him all the time like you do.” 

A start of a laugh left the eldest Covey, turning her head to look at him. “I’ll make sure we keep that in mind while we raise your children.” Before he could get anything out, she was slipping into the lake, making her way over to the youngest of the Covey. 

It took everything not to roll his eyes, to not yell after her. It wasn't the time for his annoyance to bubble up inside of him. The frustration that gnawed away without an explanation. Everything that was going on in his head wasn't their fault. Even though it would have been far easier to lash out and get it out of him. 

“It was a rough night.” Tam Amber's voice sounded above him, moving to settle next to him just the same. There was some odd comfort in it, that the older wasn't lashing out the way that Barb Azure so easily would. 

“I know.” 

His curls shook in response, letting his feet settle into the lake water. “You don't.” His voice was quiet, kept just between them like he didn't want anyone around just to hear what he had to say. “Auralee Pearl stormed into the house in the middle of the night panicking.” 

His head turned to look at him, his brow furrowing at the thought. He'd passed the houses a few times during the night and it'd seemed quiet.

“She got sick.” His head nodded back toward the bank where Lucy Gray was laid. “Had a nightmare, got sick everywhere.” 

A nightmare? That didn't sound right. The amount of nights he'd laid next to Lucy Gray, it'd been something rare in itself. Something he never saw, at least. But the more he sat and thought about it, the more he was reminded of the fact he could sit and watch the emotions be tucked away. How quickly she'd wipe everything and tack that smile back on to not worry the rest of them. 

“They stayed the night.” It'd been exactly why it'd been so quiet in the house that morning. Why he hadn't caught hearing them running around the house to get ready. “We got her cleaned up, bed changed, she sat and told us.” 

Shit. 

“Somewhat.” 

Somewhat? His head turned to look at the older, his brow furrowing. “About her leaving?” 

He nodded in response, reaching to scratch at his stubble. “Me and Babs. So, rough night for everyone.” He could only imagine how that conversation even went. What had she even said? “Didn't tell Babs everything though. Would have been a lot worse.” 

If any of them knew every secret, or how it felt, it would be the man next to him. He'd keep it quiet, always far too wise and seeming to have an answer to everything. “I tried to get her out of it. They say she has a choice.” 

“No, she doesn't,” he answered all too quickly. “Even if it wasn't Maude Ivory or some threat to the people she loves or herself,” he shook his head. “She cares too much about everyone out here, people who don’t even deserve it. She's gonna go every time.” 

“She shouldn't have to.” 

“She shouldn't,” he agreed, attention back to herself the kids were filled with giggles out in the lake. “You goin’ with her?” 

His head nodded in answer. 

“Good.” At least he didn't feel like Tam Amber hated him. Or he at least had made it obvious to him. “You got her home safe once. You focus on that. We've got them.” 

He nodded again, frowning a bit as he looked back over his shoulder to where Lucy Gray was lying. He'd have had no idea otherwise, sure she wouldn't have wanted to add it onto anyone else than she already had. 

“Tams!” Auralee Pearl's voice called from the lake, catching his attention again. She was settled on top of CC's shoulders, AJ having found his way over to Maude Ivory, kicking his feet in the water. 

“Comin’, Doll!” He called back, shifting in his spot as he turned to look at him. “We've got them.” Another moment of reassurance, in the odd comfort that always came from the older. 

“Thank you,” he mumbled, watching as he slipped off the dock and started toward the rest of them in the water. He sat quietly for a long moment, listening to the fit of giggles that were coming from the group. There wasn't a sign of discomfort, of grumbling, of just how miserable they could be. 

He finally moved, making his way down the dock toward the pile of towels. His focus stayed on Lucy Gray, who seemed all too peaceful and unmoving outside of the breaths she was taking. She could easily be asleep, soaking in the warmth of the day as peacefully as she could. 

He made his way over to her once he felt dried enough, trying to keep as quiet as he possibly could. He didn't need to disturb her, not after the night it had sounded she had had, the one she hadn't thought twice to tell him out. 

“You two fightin’ again?” Her voice startled him, not having been prepared to hear her voice as close as he was. 

“I'm not fighting.” A small huff left him, sitting down on the blanket beside her. His fingers reached to push a few strands of hair out of her face. 

“Saw the look on her face getting in the water,” she sighed, shifting in her spot to work on sitting up. It was a bit strained, a breath leaving her as she used his touch to help to sit up properly. She leaned back against him, using his shoulder for balance. “Looked pissed.” 

“She's always pissed.” That was an understatement. He was sure he could count on his hands the number of times that Barb Azure hadn't looked like she hated being around him. 

She leaned her head against his shoulder, tucking an arm around his own as she nuzzled in against him. “Not always,” she mumbled. “Don't have to be so hard on him, sweetheart.”

“Life isn't going to be easy on him, Sugar,” he reminded her. It was something he was more and more aware of with each passing down out in the Districts. It wouldn't have been such a problem if they'd made it out to the Capitol like he'd wanted so much all those years ago. It would have been easier to keep them safe. 

“He's three, Coriolanus,” she sighed, her head tilting back to look up to him as she blinked her eyes open. “What do you remember of your dad when you were three?” 

“What?” 

“What do you remember?” She questioned again, resting her cheek back against his shoulder. 

He tilted his own head back, thinking it over. “Waiting at the train station for him.” 

“And?” 

And? 

“What else do you remember about him?” she questioned, her fingers running along his bare arm. “What do you remember more? Him being loving or him being hard?” 

His brow furrowed at the thought, pulling a face. “I turned out just fine.” That likely wasn't the answer that she was looking for and the look on her face said just that. “The world's mean, Lucy Gray, you know that. He has to know what the world’s like, I don't want him to end up like him.” 

Her hand reached up, touching against his cheek. It was enough to catch his attention, to force his gaze to meet her own. “He's three,” she soothed, brown eyes searching over his face. “He has plenty of time to realize how mean and scary the world is. Right now, he's more focused on learning about shapes and colors and numbers,” she reminded him. 

“I just don't want something to happen to him,” he whispered, his gaze turning back to where the kids were out in the lake. “To either of them.”

“You better know I'd kill someone long before they were even close to being able to lay a hand on either of them,” she soothed, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “They're safe, they're happy, I just want to keep them unaware a little longer.”

His brow furrowed, listening to the mess of giggles out in the middle of the lake. They had no clue of the world around them, of just what was hanging over their heads. And maybe that was what they needed. “Are you going to tell them?” 

“Tomorrow before bed,” she offered, squeezing his jaw in her touch before she wrapped herself back around his arm. “Just that we'll be back, they'll be safe. Don't wanna worry them past that.” 

His head nodded in agreement. It didn't feel they had enough time. That each fleeting moment of joy was slipping right through his fingertips. And he just needed their world to slow down. 

“I need you to just… not be so hard,” she spoke gently where her head was settled against his shoulder. “Whatever’s going on outside of here, right now, don't let it make this weekend any harder than it already will be.” 

He shifted to press a kiss to the top of her head, nodding in agreement. “I'll try,” he mumbled. It was easier said than done most days, to pretend like the weight of everything was shoved down on their shoulders. Though he was sure Lucy Gray felt the same way, even if she didn't show it how he did.

“It'll be better soon,” she mumbled, closing her eyes once more. “The Games will be over for the year, and you'll get that promotion, and there will be food for everyone in the District,” she listed softly with a smile. “It'll be worth it.” 

How she could sound so sure would never stop blowing his mind. As if there was nothing to worry about like she didn't have all the things running in her mind. Like the smile on her lips was all real, that she wasn't just keeping it there for everyone else. 

He nodded, though he wasn't sure how much he could believe it all, shifting to press a few kisses along the top of her hair. His arms moved to wrap around her, letting her body lean against him. It was as gentle as could be, cupping underneath the bump to try and relieve at least some of the ache. “It'll be worth it.” 

“See, already in a better mind.” It was a half tease, just curling up in her spot. He was sure she'd fall asleep before long in that position like she could melt away into his touch. 

He tucked around her, just holding her and listening to the quiet hum that was moving through her. It was one of those moments he was worried to disturb. That if anything broke the moment, they would never get it back. He dropped a few kisses to her head every now and then, just keeping her as close as he could manage. 

He lost track of time, spending it curled up and listening to the song moving through Lucy Gray. As miserable as the sun felt, and how sticky the air felt, there was some peace that came being wrapped around her. 

“Mama!”

The voice was enough to cause him to blink open his eyes, landing on the girl standing in front of them. Maude Ivory, a pout settled on her lips, and her wild hair dripped from the lake. Every bit theirs despite it all. 

“Yeah, Birdie?” Lucy Gray's eyes hadn't even opened yet, her head still tilted back toward the sun. 

“What's gonna look better?” 

Lucy Gray's brows furrowed before she forced herself to look up to the girl. “For what?” 

“The show!” She sounded exasperated like the older one should already know exactly what she was talking about. “What will be liked more?” She shifted to hold out what was in her hands as she tucked down in front of them both. “Feathers or flowers?” 

“Both always look good.” 

“That doesn't help,” the girl groaned, looking up toward him as she offered them out just the same. “What's prettier?”

“You're already pretty, Maude Ivory-” His words were cut off by another dramatic groan. He watched as the younger girl all but threw herself onto the grass underneath her. 

“You always say that. I know.” Another groan. “That's not what I'm asking. Just what's prettier in hair.” Her head turned to look at the two of them where she was laid, holding her fingers up to dangle the flower feather out. “What'd ya like better in Mama's hair?” 

He looked between her and Lucy Gray, who was biting back a laugh. “I don’t…” He shrugged, looking back at her. “She looked pretty with both,” he added, chuckling as he heard yet another groan. “But, if it's for the show, the flowers might not be as fresh by the time you go on.” 

The answer seemed good enough, at least not one that earned him a groan. The girl looked between her fingers before she nodded, moving to sit up. “Thank you.” She reached over, moving to tuck the little flower behind Lucy Gray’s ear as she pressed a kiss to her cheek. She followed suit to his cheek before she was on her feet. “I'll be back, might need help with ‘em.” 

“Do I even want to know?” He asked, watching as the girl disappeared as quickly as she had toward the woods. 

“No,” she laughed, shaking her head. “Just our teenager,” she hummed, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. “Nothin’ to worry about. Just that we've got three more of those to come one of these days.” 

“With overlap,” he chuckled, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “We'll have our hands full.” 

“We already do,” she teased, smiling up to him. “Those two start running about and swear this one knows it, ready to run with them. Think they're just enjoying the sun today.” 

He pressed a few kisses to her skin along her shoulder and up her neck. “Just loves your music, Sugar,” he reasoned, nuzzling his nose against her skin.

There was a sudden thud against his other side, met with a mess of giggles. 

“Where's your towel?” He asked, reaching back for his own as he looked up to the little girl pressed against him. 

“I don't know.” Her shoulders shrugged, shaking her head of damp curls, spreading more of the droplets on them. She spun under his touch as she moved to wrap him up in the towel, letting her crawl into his lap. “AJ's comin’.”

He adjusted his hold on Lucy Gray, keeping her still wrapped up with one of his hands. His other wrapped around Auralee Pearl, rubbing along the fabric of the towel to help dry her. “You have fun?” 

“Mhm,” she hummed, laying her head against his other shoulder. “CC threw me in the air. Real high.” 

“Real high?” He asked, chuckling at the thought. “Didn't get stuck in the air, did you? Or grow any wings, did you, Bird?” 

“No, silly,” she giggled, cuddling in against him. “I don't got any wings, Dad.” 

“Maybe they're growing,” he offered, rubbing along the small of her back. “We'll have to keep a watch for them.” 

The giggle was enough to make him relax, to try and keep in mind what Lucy Gray had said. He had to just forget everything going on around them. The world was cruel enough, he didn't need to add to it. 

“Can we have ‘mores?” AJ’s voice sounded, waddling over, all wrapped up in his own towel. His curls had fallen into his face from the water, shifting to climb into Lucy Gray's lap. 

“Mores?” She asked, adjusting her touch to hold him better in her lap against her bump. “Do we have everything for them?” 

“CC said so.” He shouldn't be surprised. He had just as much of a sweet tooth as the kids did. He'd always been the one asking for them when he'd been younger. “P'ease, p’ease, p'ease?” His head tilted between the two of them, blue eyes as wide as ever. 

He looked over to Lucy Gray, who raised her brows with a shrug. “Yeah. We can do some ‘mores,” he reasoned, his fingers reaching to push back the damp curls from his eyes. “As long as you'll go to bed on time.” 

“Will!” His head nodded at the offer, cuddling back into Lucy Gray. He nuzzled into her, his little feet wiggling in his excitement. 

Auralee Pearl wiggled in his hold, just as excited at the assurance. She cuddled into him a few moments longer before she sat up like she had suddenly remembered something. “Hey, Mama?”

“Yeah, sweet girl?” 

She twisted in his hold, adjusting to look at the woman. “Who’s ‘Janus?”

His brow furrowed at the question, head turning to look at Lucy Gray just the same. He was sure it was ridiculous the way thinking about it still made him sick. That he couldn't stop the panic in his chest at hearing such an innocent question. He'd caused it himself, with the mention out in the lake that had slipped out. 

Lucy Gray met his gaze, quiet as she searched over his face. It was a question enough, wasn't it? One that he didn't even know how to answer. 

“Janus?” AJ questioned, tilting his head back to look at his sister. 

“I tried to ask Tams,” the little girl started, shaking her head. “But he just got real quiet and didn't say nothing, just looked sad.” 

She nodded at her words, rubbing along AJ’s side as she worked on drying him off. “You know Gramma? Who sends all the good sweets and toys?” She asked. 

“Mhm, she's real nice,” she giggled. It was exactly that. Ma Plinth had done all she could, sent letters and packages every chance she could. She didn't need to do it for a second but she'd told him there was some sort of comfort in it. 

“That's her son,” she explained, reaching over to push back some of her curls. “It's Sejanus,” she added, giving her a smile. Her eyes lifted up to land on him, a soothing as ever look there. “He was your dad's best friend.” 

Best friends had always felt like a stretch. Something that he was sure he'd never fully ever admit. Or at least, that's how it had always been before. His head tilted back, watching the birds that were flying high above. It was easier to focus there, to not deal with the way he could feel the start of what he was sure were tears.

He'd always hated them. More than he'd like to admit, seeing as how much Lucy Gray seemed to adore them. They'd always found some way to haunt him. Lucy Gray's song, Sejanus’ pleads, the begs of anyone with their last breath at the Hanging Tree. 

At least out here, they echoed joy. They sang out giggles and squeals and whatever attempt at following Lucy Gray's songs came from the kids. They were far less haunting than the ones that flew around in his mind, in the quiet of the night on his own. At least in that moment, the call of the birds was nearly comforting. That he could focus on them rather than the questions falling from the kids cuddled in close, wanting to know every bit of their life before. 

Chapter Text

It was always busy work before the start of a show. He knew better than to try and interrupt, more than anything else, and to only move from his spot if he was asked. He’d learned over the years that the best way to be of any help was to just stay out of the way. It was a little more difficult to do just that when Lucy Gray was pregnant, the closer she got to her due date, the more she needed more than just him out of the way. 

Which was what led to Coriolanus trying to work through the trunk of shoes, trying to find something that would be best for her. Her boots were, more times than not, her go-to, but they were getting harder for her to slip on and be comfortable with. 

He moved to sit back on the couch, two pairs settled in his hand as he looked at Lucy Gray, who was curled up. Her eyes were closed, curled up in the dress she was wearing and her feet pulled up on the couch beside her. She seemed peaceful like she was trying to will away all of the noise that was sounding around them in the back of the Hob.

“You got two options.”

“I got a whole lot more than two pairs.” It was enough to cause a laugh to leave him, still not blinking her eyes open. “Easily got a dozen boots.” 

“That Maude Ivory also wants,” he reasoned, shifting the shoes in his hands. “Boots, these have laces so it’s a little more comfy. Or we can go with flats.”

“Flats?” She scoffed, sounding near offended as she blinked her eyes open, settling on the man beside her. “Who do you think I am?”

“Someone whose feet are hurting,” he answered, offering them out to her but chuckled as he saw the look sent his way. “You’re going to want to be in these the rest of the week, this is your chance.” 

“I’ll be fine,” she assured, adjusting in her spot to twist on the couch. It was enough of a movement, shifting to settle her feet into his lap. “Boots.”

“Boots.” He shifted to reach for the rolled-up socks, slipping them onto her feet with a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Tired.”

He wasn’t surprised. The night had been anything but peaceful. Lucy Gray had sat CC and Maude Ivory down to explain to them that they’d be leaving. Their normally empty bed, one that was usually Lucy Gray curled up on herself, had been filled to the brim. He’d been curled on one side, and Auralee Pearl and AJ crawled and cuddled on top of him. On the other side, squeezed all together the same way they had after Lucy Gray had gotten back from the games, were Maude Ivory and CC as near as they could be. They’d only grown over the years, though from just how the night had gone, they were still as small as they had been those years before. 

It’d been far from comfortable and the heat had gotten near unbearable. But it’d been needed. That reassurance that Lucy Gray was there. That she wasn’t going anywhere and would be back, just the same as she had once she’d gotten back from the Games the first time. 

“You’ll sleep well after tonight, at least.” That was the hope. But he knew that was almost too much to ask for. She’d likely be up most of the night in her panic, in the spiraling, that she was going to be struggling with. Not that he blamed her. It was far from the easiest thing to deal with as someone outside of the District. He could only imagine when they were kids that Lucy Gray would likely know. Ones that he recognized the faces and families of. “Get all that energy out.”

“Hopefully,” she mumbled, watching him as he worked on slipping the boots onto her feet. “Need you to drink for me tonight.”

“Drink for you?”

“Mhm.” She gestured down to her bump as if it were as obvious as ever. “Take two shots, one for me. Do a Sweet Songbird Shot.”

“Two shots? And one is yours?” He questioned, a small laugh leaving him. “I think you don’t want me making that train tomorrow if you want me doing two shots, let alone one of yours.”

A groan left her as she rolled her eyes at the comment, shaking her head with a smile. “Fine, give it to one of your boys,” she waved off the thought. “Somebody’s gotta take one for me.” 

“I’ll get it to someone,” he assured, working the laces up on her feet. “Tell me if they’re too tight.”

Her head nodded, leaning it against the couch cushion with a small sigh. “They’re fine,” she assured quietly, eyes following after the moving bodies around them as the rest of the Covey were getting ready. 

He got both of the boots settled on her feet, making sure they weren’t too tight on her legs. “There we go,” he soothed, patting them and helping her adjust to get comfortable once more where she was settled on the couch. 

“You’re the best,” she whispered, shifting to lean over and press a kiss to his lips. It was small, sweet, as close as she could get in their spots. 

His fingers moved to push back some of her locks from her face, giving him a smile. “Just here to help, Sugar,” he soothed. 

“What do we think?” Maude Ivory’s voice caught both of their attention, standing in front of them on the couch. There she was, some of the feathers in her hair from the trip the day before to the lake. She was wearing one of Lucy Gray’s old outfits, ones he’d seen her wear dozens of times out at the Hob. It was one he could never forget though, the same outfit he’d seen her in the first time he’d made his way to the Hob. The purple plaid skirt and the black top that was tucked into it, little embroidered flowers that had been so carefully laid. It’d been a top that Lucy Gray had told him had once belonged to her own mother, just like most of the dresses that were worn in the Hob.

Lucy Gray’s face softened at the sight of her, adjusting in her spot as she looked her over. “Oh, you look so beautiful,” she cooed over her, twisting her finger to get her to spin. The younger girl did just that, spinning slowly for her to take sight of. “Pause.”

“Pause?” She questioned, peeking over her shoulder at the two of them, taking a few steps back as she was motioned. “What is it?” 

“Just being my silly little duck,” she soothed, motioning toward Coriolanus.

He shifted in his spot, eyes falling on just what she’d mentioned. It was the last bit of the shirt that she hadn’t been able to tuck in properly. It was curved over the edge of the top of the skirt, giving some little sight of what could be seen as a duck tail. He reached to tuck it in for her, chuckling at the sight. No matter how much she’d tried to seem all grown up, she still had moments that just reminded them both of how small she once had been. “Perfect.”

“Think he’ll like it?”

Lucy Gray’s head nodded in response, which only caused his brow to furrow.

Before he could question, Maude Ivory seemed to have some sort of other thought, taking a few steps away. “Oh, the other thing to see,” she started, giving them both a look. “Close your eyes.”

“Our eyes?” He questioned, though the look that was sent his way was more than enough to warn him to do so without asking. He closed his eyes, tilting his head back as he waited for the sign to reopen them from the girl. Once he’d been given the go-ahead, he shifted his head back down and blinked them back open.

In front of them stood AJ and Auralee Pearl. AJ was dressed in some shorts and a little plaid vest, one he was sure had once belonged to CC years before. Auralee Pearl was dressed in one of Maude Ivory's old outfits, the same one from that same night as the outfit the older was wearing then. It'd simply been passed down, a bit long on their girl, but still certainly wearable with the belt around her. 

“Look at you two,” Lucy Gray cooed, waving them over, which they moved just as quickly over to the couch. Auralee Pearl was quick into his lap while AJ seemed to settle against Lucy Gray, cuddling up around their Mama like it was exactly where they belonged. “Our little stars.” 

“Very cute,” he agreed, reaching to twist one of the feathers that were tied into the little girl's curls in his fingers. “A big night?” 

“Very big,” Auralee Pearl agreed as if he should already know it. “You'll like it. Make sure you pay lots of attention out in your spot.” 

“I won't miss it,” he assured, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Be right where I always am.” 

No one seemed to want to bother with the space that had once been grabbed as his own. It was back against the wall, nearly in the center, just right where he could keep an eye on everything in the building. What others might think was him setting up guard in the back of the Hob for any trouble had been anything but. He'd wanted the best seat in the Hob, the perfect spot where Lucy Gray could look right at him over the crowd. Not a soul would really know otherwise, with the way he normally sat with a clenched jaw and some shit drink in his hands. Even on days he wasn't there, the space was free from anyone else as if fearing that he may appear and take the spot instead. 

“Good,” she spoke, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Birds!” Barb Azure's voice called from the other side of the room, getting both of their attention. “Come help!” 

They were gone as quickly as they had appeared, the little girl gripping tight to her brother's hand as she guided him out of the room and into the main part of the Hob.

“They need to stop growing up,” Lucy Gray sighed quietly, her head moving to lay against his shoulder.

“Yeah,” he agreed quietly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. His brows furrowed in the quiet, as it all seemed to run through his mind. “Who's he?” 

“He?” She questioned, tilting her head back to look at him. 

His head nodded, thinking it over. “Maude Ivory asking if we think he'll like it?” 

“Oh,” she laughed, shaking her head in response. “It's nothing.” 

“It's something. Someone,” he reasoned. “A he?” 

“A boy.” 

“A boy?” He felt ridiculous questioning such a thing. “Like… a friendly boy or?” 

She rolled her eyes at the thought, smiling as she looked up at him. “Just a boy.” 

It was silly to worry over it, he knew that. She was eighteen and more than responsible. But that didn't change the worry that bit into him. “He's gonna be here?” 

A nod in response. 

“Which boy?” He asked. “Just so… I know. I do know all the ones who are trouble.” 

Her eyes rolled once more with a small laugh, shifting to press a kiss to his cheek. “It's that Everdeen boy. His house is at the start of the Seam.” 

He thought it over, thinking through the faces of kids. There was one that popped into his mind, one he remembered dirtied from the mines more than anything. “Never had any trouble with him. Now his friends-”

“His friends aren't him,” she reminded him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “He's been real sweet, walks her home after school, makes sure she gets home safe. Cheek kisses,” she explained. “She likes him a lot.” 

“She's too young,” he answered, tilting his head back as he wrapped her up in his touch, pressing a kiss to her head. “She can date when she's maybe twenty. Definitely at twenty-five. Maybe then, she’s not ready to date yet.” 

“Coriolanus,” she laughed, shifting to lean in closer against him. “When you were her age, you were cheating in the Games to try and get a chance to kiss me,” she recalled, voice quiet as she nuzzled close to him. “And when I was her age, Auralee Pearl was in my arms, so, think she's plenty old enough for a crush on a sweet boy.” 

“I don't know. That was different.” He shrugged at the thought. She had a point, every bit. But that didn't make him a fan of it. “Think she's still begging for a piggyback ride. No need for a boy.” 

She rolled her eyes, another kiss on his cheek as she nudged against him. “You better not embarrass her, or scare the poor boy off,” she warned him with a soft laugh. “She'd never forgive you. And it's nothing more than a little crush right now. He ain't gonna show up on the doorstep tomorrow and ask for her hand in marriage.” 

“He might.” He laughed at the look that was sent his way. “I wanted to.” 

“That's because you're you,” she teased, her fingers reaching to nudge against his chin. Just as he always did her, which only caused his eyes to roll. “Barb Azure was sure you were going to, scared her plenty that day.” 

“Might as well be my job,” he whispered, shifting to press a kiss to her lips. 

“You do a great job at it,” she agreed, pecking another kiss before she pulled back. “You better get going, your boys are usually the first ones here.” 

A small groan left him, leaning in closer to clear the space between them. “I'll walk you home after.” Another kiss for good measure. 

“Come tuck them in with me,” she whispered, leaning in for another kiss. “After Sunny Side,” she instructed. “I'll make sure Maude Ivory plays a big loud one.” 

He nodded, stealing one last kiss before he grabbed her ankles, shifting them carefully out of his lap. “I'll make it,” he promised, giving her a smile. “Take it easy, okay? Take your breaks.” 

“I'll be fine,” she assured, swinging her feet a bit on the edge of the couch.

“I love you.” 

“I love you.” Her hand reached across to squeeze his own. “Go.” 

He dropped one last kiss to his lips before he climbed off the couch, making his way up the back stairs to the alley. No one would think twice once the crowd started to be let into the Hob. 

It was easy enough to slip onto the crowd, as the doors opened. It was always one of the busiest nights of the year, the night before the Reaping and New Year's Eve, always drawing as many people as the Hob could fit. 

“There's the man of the hour.” Beanpole's voice caught his attention as he paused at the bar. A hand settled against his shoulder, turning his head to look back at him. “We drinking hard tonight?” 

“With a 3 am start?” He questioned, chuckling as he was passed over a glass. “Wouldn't test it.” 

“We could have fun,” he laughed, giving him a nudge as he was passed a few bottles. “Suds was pre-gaming. Tried his first moonshine chug.” 

“He's going to regret it in the morning.” But well, maybe it'd be better than dealing with just what the morning would bring. He offered his hand out to take a few bottles, helping get them taken back to the tables. 

“It's a rite of passage,” he teased, settling the bottles down onto the wood. “We'll make him do the heavy lifting too. It's a great idea.” 

Coriolanus shook his head, moving to sit on his normal stool, and reaching for his glass. “You're lucky he likes you so much,” he chuckled. His eyes scanned over the crowd, taking a sip as he scowled. “Who the fuck invited him?” 

Beanpole followed his gaze to where Perch was at the bar. “Oh, Perch?” 

“Nah shit,” he grumbled, furrowing his brow. It was a rare occurrence, the dumbass at least had a sense of mind to not. 

He met Smiley's gaze as he made his way over, reaching for one of the bottles on the table. The look alone must have been enough to register just what was being kept from said aloud. “Boosting morale.” 

His eyes rolled at the answer, settling back against the wall. “He starts anything-” 

“His ass is out,” he assured, taking a sip of his drink before he gestured toward Beanpole. “Don't think Suds is gonna be able to carry a box without knocking someone out.” 

“Got ‘em.” Beanpole nodded, taking a long drag from his bottle before he made his way through the crowd. 

He sat quietly for a moment, finger tapping against the glass before he adjusted. “Lucy Gray's being sent to the Capitol,” he started, watching the confusion cross Smiley's face in front of him. “For the Games.” They didn't know. It hadn't exactly been advertised. “Hoff's sending me as her escort, keep her in line.” 

The suggestion caused a laugh to leave Smiley in response, shaking his head. 

“I need you to do me a favor.” Always. Smiley and the rest of them had covered for him more times than he could damn count at that point. 

“Keep an eye out?”

His head nodded, looking down at the glass for a moment. “At least make sure Perch stays off Seam rotation,” he reasoned. It'd be easy enough, all the man did was bitch about it anyways. 

“Yeah, I can do that.” He offered that calming smile, one that sometimes felt wrong to get to witness. “It'll be fine. You worry about everything out there.” He gave his shoulder a nudge. “Back to the Capitol, huh? Sure that'll be weird.” 

Weird was the simplest way to put it. There was no telling just how much had changed. He'd been told a few things in letters and calls, but that wasn't the same as living through it. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “See if it's worth getting back to one of these days. Feels like it’d be a lot better than being here.” The kids would be safer there. So would Lucy Gray. But getting them there, now, would be harder than if he'd just taken her back all those years ago. 

“Things always look a lot better in the rearview, Gent,” Smiley offered, nudging his bottle against his glass before his eyes seemed to fall on the line making their way over. 

Beanpole settled one of the crates down alongside Bug in front of the table, who moved to nudge Suds down on the edge of it. The poor kid looked worse for wear, clearly having already done too much. “You stay.” 

“I stay,” Suds repeated, nodding his head as Beanpole sat down next to him. “Can I have more?” 

“Definitely not,” Beanpole laughed, nudging against his head as he tried to lay it on his shoulder. “Maybe some water.” 

“You're no fun,” the youngest grumbled but took the water that was offered to him. 

“They'll do their yearly shot, you'll want to be alive for that one,” Bug reasoned on the other side of him, leaving the only open space too close to him for comfort. Which Perch took but not before sending a hard stare. It was all too noticeable just how crooked his nose was now, which only caused a small snort to leave him. It’d been well worth the complaint raised against him, honestly.

“Oh,” Beanpole twisted in his spot, his brows raised in excitement. “Songbird can't drink. Think someone will take her shot?” 

“It's tradition,” Coriolanus started, as if Lucy Gray hadn't tried to get him to be the one to do just that. “Maybe you'll be the lucky one.”

“What is it?” Suds asked, looking over the rest of them. He was lucky to still be sitting upright, with just how hooded his eyes already looked. 

“Sweet moonshine,” Smiley answered. “Chugs the jar, there's a cherry in there and she ties it with her tongue. Real good party trick.”

“It's probably just water.” Perch's voice disturbed it all, bringing him once again to the reminder that he was there. “Seems right up her alley, some big show of bullshit.” 

The comment gained more than enough eye-rolls from the rest of them, which made him feel a bit better about it. Bug even reached out to shove at him, some pointed look that told him to shut the fuck up. 

“I'm just saying, she doesn't even flinch.” 

He shut out the rest of whatever the man was running his mouth about, sure if he listened too closely, he'd bash his head against the wall. His gaze searched around the crowd, settling on the stage as he took a sip of his drink. 

Maude Ivory was the only one still on the stage, far too close to its edge. In front of her stood some boy, looking as dirty as he could, like he’d just gotten off a shift at the mines and had made his way there. She seemed all too focused on him, giggling at something that had been said to her. 

Her name must have been called from the way her head had whipped around toward the back of the stage. She gave a sheepish smile, offering a small touch to his face before she disappeared behind it. She looked happy, at least, that counted for something, no matter how quickly it all felt like they were growing up. And there was nothing he could do to stop it, completely out of his control.

It didn’t take long before the familiar stomp began, enough to draw the crowd's attention to the stage. It was nearly the same as every night, some build-up to the Covey making their way onto the stage. It was as big a show as always, with Maude Ivory at the microphone welcoming them on stage. She’d become more and more showy over the years, following in Lucy Gray’s footsteps like her life had depended on it. 

The kids were settled on the edge of the stage next to the stairs, their own little drum sat between them. It'd been the easiest to get them onto, though Lucy Gray had been teaching guitar when she could. They looked as happy as could be, beaming from the cheers that had sounded after their names were called. 

“And last, and certainly not least, the one, the only, Lucy Gray Baird!” 

Just as always, his songbird floated onto the stage as if her feet had never touched the ground. His whirlwind of a rainbow filled the world around him with color once more. Even if the pregnancy had swollen her fingers against the strings and had made her hold her guitar awkwardly against her bump. She was as perfect as could be. 

And barefoot.

The sight of her barefoot on the stage caused him to chuckle, settling back against the wall behind him. She was as joyful as she could be, a wide grin there despite it all. No one would believe for a moment that she was being sent to the Capitol in the morning. If he didn’t know, he’d believe just the same. 

“Well, hey there, District 12,” Lucy Gray started, only met with cheers from the crowd. They were watching every move, hanging on to every word that was spoken. They’d be like that the entire night, sure that they wouldn't take a foot outside of the Hob until she said good night. “It's real good to see all these pretty and handsome faces out here.” 

She was charming as ever, that bright smile and playful winks sent out to the crowd. She'd have them eating out of her hand before long and there was no denying that as the crowd grew quiet as her voice filled the air. He'd never get tired of it, there was no denying it. She thrived there, it was where he'd seen her the happiest when he'd first arrived. And he was sure it still rang true. 

It was easy to get lost in her song, in the music, in the show that they put on. It didn't matter how many times they had sung a song, it always was like the first with how people reacted. The room felt electric with too many emotions and too much alcohol passing around to cope with the morning that was waiting for them. 

He had to bite back his smile as he watched her, something that felt it became harder and harder with each passing song. Even if he could see her getting more and more exhausted with each song, the way that she had to pause between more than usual, he could tell she was happy. And that was all he wanted, knowing how rough the next few days would likely be for her. 

She’d finally just managed to find her breath from a song when she’d raised her hand, slowly lowering it down to call for quiet over the crowd. Anything she asked of them, she’d do, he was sure of that the more that he looked around. Far too many eyes had focused on her and the Hob had fallen silent. 

“It’s our most favorite part of this awful night,” she started, that all too bright grin looking more bittersweet than ever. “You’ll see lots of movements in the next few minutes while we get things ready, and your favorite little birds will be coming by, with their big puppy dog eyes, so if you have a heart, don’t break theirs.” A start of a laugh moved through her, though it got choked in her throat. “I do ask for just a minute of your time before we keep drinking and dancing our fears away.” 

The silence was too much as she tried to bring herself back to being able to say a word. 

Her hand reached out to her side, gesturing over Maude Ivory who moved without question. Even as much as the girl had grown and practically towered over Lucy Gray, there was still no question she was her girl. “We’re gonna celebrate, just for a moment before we start wallowing again in what awaits us tomorrow,” she started, reaching to touch Maude Ivory’s chin. “Most of you have known my little Sunshine since the moment we stepped foot in here.”

Maude Ivory groaned at her words, her eyes rolling in response. But she stayed tucked right in next to Lucy Gray as if there was nowhere else she would rather be. 

“And it’s finally the big day. Her very last Reaping.” That was enough to stir a wave of cheers from the crowd, even though he could see that the worry wouldn’t leave Lucy Gray. They only had a  few years before it even had to be a worry about theirs. And the likelihood was so small. But Lucy Gray would spend every day thinking about it. “And we don’t know what tomorrow is gonna bring, but tonight, we’re celebrating that little victory.” 

The younger girl easily wrapped around her, as odd of an angle as it was for her to fit. There was something that was whispered, that caused them both to laugh. Happy. Even if he could see what he was sure were tears about to fall. 

“And to celebrate properly, we’re gonna give her her very first shot for her very last Reaping.” Another sound of cheers. Drunk. Numb. That would be the best way to be. It sounded more than appealing to him. “Y’all know how this goes, if you don’t want one, just let us know. My other Sunshine CC’s gonna play something for us while we get everything settled,” she explained, all too well rehearsed on the steps to take. “And not a drop is to be drank until I say. I can see all y’all from here and I can throw pretty far.” It caused laughter, giving her enough time to work her guitar off around her. 

The Covey moved as smoothly as ever, CC stepping up to the microphone with his fiddle, filling the air with the smooth sound. CC wouldn't touch any of it, the one of the Covey that wouldn't drink a drop. Not that he blamed him, with how his brother acted the moment he took a sip. 

His eyes tracked Auralee Pearl and AJ made their way through the crowd, little heads just barely visible as they moved. They were adored and cooed over like they were everyone’s little birds. They had their own track that they followed, weaving through with their baskets for any treats or coins tossed their way.

“You got anything?” Beanpole’s voice pulled his attention away from the kids, eyes landing on the other. 

“Those little cookies from Ma,” Smiley answered, working the packs out of his front pocket. They’d take turns deciding who would bring the little treats from the packages sent from Ma Plinth. 

“These are the good ones,” Beanpole grumbled as he reached back to grab them. It was always one of the complaints, that the Covey would get some of the best treats from what was sent to them. “You couldn’t have brought the popcorn balls?”

His eyes rolled, watching as the kids made their way in front of them, and how Auralee Pearl kept a tight grip on AJ’s hand. “Sirs.” Her little voice spoke, curtsying in her skirt in front of them. She was adjusted at just the right angle, entirely clear she was avoiding Perch where he was settled on the crate. “You got the goods, Mr. Beanie?”

“We sure do,” Beanpole chuckled, moving to settle the cookies down into the basket. He put a few small coins into AJ’s basket, who beamed like no other. “Think that’ll do?”

Auralee Pearl inspected the treats in the basket, as serious of a face as she could manage to have. It was moments like that it was clear just how much she looked like Lucy Gray, her brows furrowed together. “It’ll be perfect,” she agreed with a giggle, that smile finding its way to her face. “Thank you kindly, sirs.” Another little curtsy and a spin, only letting AJ’s hand go for a moment before she started past them. 

“Are you going to ask me?” Perch’s voice caused her to stop in her steps, her head turning to look over the man. 

“We ain’t ‘pposed to talk to strangers.” It was almost laughable. But at least that story had seemed to be stuck in her head. 

“You’re talking to them.” 

Auralee Pearl looked far from impressed, normally wide brown eyes narrowing at the sight of him. “Well, honestly,” she started. He could see the gears going in her mind, of just what she would be allowed to say. “Our Mama told us if we ain’t got nothin’ nice to say to someone we don’t like, just to keep our mouths shut and not talk to ‘em.”

It was enough to cause a laugh to leave the rest of them, especially with the look that the girl sent the man’s way. It had seemed to quiet him, which felt like a miracle in itself. Even more so as she just bounded away with AJ as if she had never been there for a moment. 

Bug snorted out in his laughter, shaking his head. “She’s got a bite to her.”

“Little snakes usually do.” Even with Perch not looking back at him, he could picture that ugly scowl on his face. The exact scowl he wanted to rip right off of it. 

“Songbird comin’ this way,” Suds hiccuped from his spot, looking at least a little more steady in his spot. “That way.” His hand reached out to point, as obvious as it was, where Lucy Gray was heading directly toward them with her arms full. 

“Hi, fellas,” she cooed, sitting down a few jars before shifting to pass over the mixed cups and glasses out to them. Her accent was as thick as ever, always a sign of trouble. “You the check-in crew for tomorrow?”

“Yes ma’am,” Coriolanus spoke, reaching over for the glass from her. 

She nodded at the answer. “That’s what I was hopin’.” She was as charming as she could be, reaching over for one of the jars as she got some of the glasses filled. “Which one of you boys are gonna take my shot for me? Least you deserve for all your hard work.”

Suds let out another giggle, leaning forward from his spot on the edge of the crate to point down toward Perch. “He don’t think there’s a drink in there.” 

“Oh?” 

“Yeah, thinks it’s some bullshit.” 

Her head turned toward the man, looking him over just as Auralee Pearl had. A snort of a laugh left her as she shifted, reaching over for another jar on the table. It was an odd red color and he knew the smell too well. “You wanna give it a try to prove it?”

“No.” Perch shook his head as he stared her down, narrowed eyes as he looked up to her. 

“Oh, c’mon.” Her lips pressed together into a playful pout, raising her brows at the sight of him. “It ain’t got rat poison in there if that’s what you’re scared of. I’m not that fun.” Her fingers twisted the lid of the jar off, settling it on the table behind him. She was trying to rile him up, there was no denying that, something that his own look at her was trying to warn her against. She caught the sight, the edge of her smile curling up to try and bite back her smirk. “You scared of a lil drink? Been drinkin’ since I was my little bird’s age, this ain’t nothin’.” She was playing up the drawl, the batting of her lashes as if she were anything innocent and sweet. 

Perch was silent for a long moment before he held his hand out to take the jar. “I’m not scared.”

“You’ve got to take it right,” she warned him, nudging against his chin with the edge of the jar to tilt his head back. She lifted her gaze to look at him and Smiley, biting back her own giggle as he moved to tip the drink. 

The sound that left Perch was one of regret nearly immediately as the liquor seemed to hit the back of his throat. He immediately lurched forward, coughing as he spat it out onto the floor in front of him. “What the fuck is that shit?” 

“It’s not that bad,” Smiley laughed from beside him, reaching across to take the jar from Lucy Gray. “I’ll take it, thank you, Ms. Songbird.” 

“You’re quite welcome, Mr. Smiley,” she laughed, doing her own playful curtsy just as Auralee Pearl had. “Might wanna clean that up, Perch, don’t wanna slip in it and get another black eye.” She winked, moving to pick up the other jar with a small wave to the rest of them. “See you in the morning, boys.” 

“See ya, Songbird!” Suds called after her, watching her as she made her way back toward the stage. “She's so pretty.” He was definitely still drunk. “Think I got a chance?” 

“No.” Four voices answered at once as if chiding a child. 

“I think you need more water,” Bug added, reaching for the glass that had been settled into the other's hand. “I'll drink this.” 

The sound of the fiddle quieting was enough to pull their attention back to the stage where Lucy Gray had settled back in front of the mic. “Alright, friends,” she started, nodding her head over for Maude Ivory, who made her way next to her. “Time to raise a glass.”

The crowd listened all too easily, following along without having to ask. 

A small sigh left her, looking over to the girl beside her before she cleared her throat. “We all know how tomorrow is gonna go. For most everyone, there’ll be a big sigh of relief by the end of the Reaping. You’ll go home, you’ll hold your kids, you’ll celebrate and keep goin’ on with your life like the day never happened,” she started, trying to keep it all together as she could. “But for some, it’ll be the worst day of their lives. At least one family will never get to hold their baby again, will never get to tuck them in bed again, or say that they love them.”

She quieted for a moment, her head turning to look at where Auralee Pearl and AJ were settled on the edge of the steps. She was quiet, blinking a few times before she cleared her throat, nodding once more. 

“And those people are gonna need us more than ever. They’re gonna be people you love or know or work with,” she explained. “It’s our job, as their neighbors, to take care of them, to be there. We need to take care of each other. We need to hug our babies a little tighter tonight.” He was sure she wouldn’t sleep. “We’ve lost real good people over the years, ones who had amazing lives ahead of them that were cut too short. Don’t forget to pour a drop for them.” 

There was another pause, being passed over an empty glass by Maude Ivory. 

“To the lives that will be forever changed by the end of tomorrow. To the kids that are going to go through hell and fight to make it back home. To the ones of us left behind. To the heart that these Games will try and take from us. To one day soon seeing it all end.” 

Her head nodded over to Maude Ivory, who tilted her head back to take a shot from her own glass. The younger girl pulled a face, screwing up in disgust as she coughed. It was a clear distaste for it all.

The crowd followed in the movement, taking the shots, including himself. He pulled a face at the taste, settling the glass down on the table as he looked over at Smiley. There he was, sipping on the drink from Lucy Gray without much issue. 

There was the quietest of a sniffle that was caught by the mic as Lucy Gray adjusted in her spot. “We’ve got a favorite of yours to bring a little cheer to this night,” she hummed, moving to take the glass from Maude Ivory. “And it’s the last song before I put you in the very capable hands of this Sunshine while I get the birds in bed.”

Maude Ivory pressed a kiss to her cheek as Lucy Gray made her way to settle with the kids, waving behind her. Tam Amber moved quietly, carrying a crate next to the microphone beside her. “This is a special treat, we’ve been practicing this one in secret.” She shifted her drum to her side. “I’d like to introduce you to one of my favorite birds in the entire world, looks like her Mama and named after me. The one, the only, Auralee Pearl.” 

The little girl bounced out of her Mama’s arms to the cheers for her, making her way over to the crate that had been left behind for her. “Hi there.” She was beaming like no other, happy as she could be.

“Y’all know this song, wanna see some dancing and singing with us,” Maude Ivory called out, her hand patting against the drum to start the beat. It was joined by the rest of the Covey, filling the air with the music, and giving a little nod to the girl.

Auralee Pearl shifted on her toes, nodding her head along to the music before her little voice sounded. “There’s a dark and a troubled side of life. There’s a bright and a sunny side too.” 

He couldn’t help his grin as he listened to the two of them singing together, something he couldn’t even try and hide. He was lucky enough that most everyone was, for that matter, between the singing and dancing there was. He caught sight of Lucy Gray, who was tucked close to AJ and just watching her two girls. She looked as proud as she could as she cuddled in with their boy. 

It was the most joy he was sure that there would be for the night, something that would ease the way the world felt. At least for the rest of the night, sure that it would change by the morning. There was dancing and singing, laughter, the best there would be during the night. Watching the way that Auralee Pearl bounced in her spot the exact way that he’d watched Lucy Gray all those years ago made his heart swell. 

“Ain’t she something special?” Maude Ivory cooed over her, giving the girl a tight squeeze as the song came to an end. “It’s time for our little birds to get to bed. Lucy Gray will be right back with a little more before we call it an end.” 

He watched as Tam Amber moved across the stage, making his way over to Lucy Gray. He reached for AJ first before he helped Lucy Gray to her feet. He nodded over for Auralee Pearl, who gave one last curtsy to the crowd before following them off the steps of the stage toward the back. 

He sat quietly, watching as Maude Ivory started back up some loud song, waiting for his moment to slip out. He’d learned over the years the best way to disappear, how to get lost in the crowd, and even more so when they’d all been drinking. “I’m gonna take a leak,” he commented, getting a nod from Smiley. 

"Hey, Perch,” Smiley commented, moving to stack a few glasses together. “Take this shit to the bar. And get some rags for your mess.”

“Fuck off,” Perch grumbled, looking as irritated as he could before he moved to stand. He reached for the rest of the empty glasses, making his way in the opposite direction toward the bar. 

It was his best chance to make his way toward the hall. It was enough to pretend, some little bathroom that he could squeeze into if needed. Though he slipped down the hall even further once he was sure no one was around, making his way into the back room past the sliding doors. 

“They’re back there,” Tam Amber’s voice sounded as he worked on shutting the door behind him. “Have her take her time, she doesn’t have to come back anytime soon,” he added, a bit quieter than the rest. 

“Thank you,” he mumbled, giving him a nod as the older slipped out of the doors and shut them behind him. 

Coriolanus made his way over toward the back where Lucy Gray had them set up. It was the closest to a mattress that they could manage back there, somewhere that they could get some sleep before being carried back home. 

“Did you see, Dad?” Auralee Pearl asked, moving to settle on the edge of the mattress next to where AJ was already looking as tired as he could be. 

“I did, that was great,” he cooed, making his way over toward where the kids were, sitting on the floor next to them. “You both did really well tonight. Really showed off,” he added, watching their smiles at the praise. 

“Really shined,” Lucy Gray spoke, making her way over with a blanket in her touch, along with Romeo. “We need to sit and talk for a minute, and we need you both to listen, okay?” 

The two of them both nodded at her words, tucked in close against one another as she settled on the floor right next to him. AJ reached out for the stuffed dog, moving to tuck him against his chest. 

She was quiet for a long time, sure she was trying to find even a way to try and address all of this. Her fingers reached over, after a moment, to take their hands in her own, looking over the two in front of her. “Me and Dad are gonna be gone for a little while.” She paused before clearing her throat. “We won’t be at home, we won’t be here.”

“Where are you goin’?” AJ asked quietly. 

She turned to look at him, her brow furrowing. What could they even say? What all could be said? “We’re going to the Capitol. Where Aunt Tigris and Gramma live,” he answered, reaching to push back a few of his curls. “Mama has to do some work and I’m going with her to help out, so she’s not all alone.” 

“But we are,” Auralee Pearl’s voice answered, looking upset already. 

Lucy Gray shook her head in answer, shifting in her spot closer to them. “You’re not. You won’t be. You’ll be with your aunts and uncles. And I bet they’ll let you do whatever you like,” she added. They’d be spoiled like no other to try and distract them otherwise. “And everything’s gonna be okay. We’ll be back before you even realize it. And then we should have more time together, he’s gonna have more breaks.” 

It seemed to relax them, at least, a little bit. 

She shifted her touch on them, looking over their faces as she made sure they were looking at her. “What’s our promise? Mama and Dad…”

“Always come back,” they both answered back. 

“That’s right,” she soothed. “That’s so right. We always come back home to you.” She leaned in to press a few kisses to both of their faces. 

“And we always will,” he added, wanting to make sure that they knew that. They needed to. They’d done all that they could. “No matter how long we might be gone too.” 

“Exactly,” Lucy Gray agreed. “And listen, while we’re gone, you have to listen to your aunts and uncles. Okay? You don’t go anywhere without them, you don’t go anywhere near the base. Mr. Smiley, Mr. Beanie, or Mr. Bugsy might come out on patrol by the house, but that’s okay. But anyone else, you stay away from, you understand me?”

“Yeah, Mama,” Auralee answered, to which AJ nodded in agreement. “We’ll stay home.”

“Good,” she cooed, another few kisses against their faces. “Everything’s going to be just fine. You two just worry about being good, don’t worry about us.” She shifted to help get the two of them laid down, settling the blanket against them both and tucked in. 

He shifted to lean down and pressed a kiss to their heads, watching the two of them already trying to stay awake. “I’ll see you when we get back. I love you.” 

“We both do,” Lucy Gray agreed, cooing over them both. There was a soft hum moving through her, their favorite little lullaby starting from her to help and lull them to sleep. Her voice soothed, calmed, shaky fingers running through their locks. 

He sat back and watched the three of them, just taking in the sight. It was far from fair. Far from anything any of them deserved. But it was their life now, it sounded like. Maybe life would be different if they’d made it to the Capitol. Maybe they’d know safety was guaranteed then. 

As Lucy Gray sat back, her gaze focused on the floor underneath her. He could just see the way that her fingers were shaking, how she was trying to steady herself. Even as he reached for her, there was no real reaction from her. 

“Lucy Gray?”

The call of her voice was ignored, shifting her touch against her bump. It was as protective as could be, watching the way that her shoulders pulled together. Her gaze was steady on the ground, some small rock in her movement. 

“Sugar?” His fingers moved to touch against her cheek, watching as she leaned into the touch. He could feel something wet against her cheek, sure that they were tears. 

She stayed against his touch for a long moment, nuzzling against his fingers before she pulled away. She was exhausted. She looked beyond it, still not completely meeting his gaze. There was no telling just what was going on in her mind then. “You need to go.” 

“What?” 

“You need to go.” She was already moving to push herself up to her feet. Her hands were shifting, trying to work off the back of her dress. As if it were as normal of a night as possible. The kids were put to sleep, changed into a new dress, back to bouncing onto the stage just like always. “I've already pissed him off, he'll come looking for you before long.” 

“Yeah, ‘bout that,” he sighed, moving to his feet. “Don't think you need to try to make him mad.” 

“Already going to, might as well have a little fun.”

He sighed as he made his way over to her, helping get the zipper. “I can stay and help.” 

“I just gotta pull it over my head,” she answered, doing just that as she tugged it off. “You don't need trouble. I'll be out in just a minute. It's fine.” It was all too convincing, even more so as she turned to look at him. How put together she was, how any sign of tears was far from sight, likely wiped in her changing. “They're asleep, I'll be out by the end of the song if you get your ass moving.” 

His eyes rolled a bit, shifting to take her hand into his. He pulled her in close, his other reaching to nudge her chin upwards. He pecked her lips, sweet as he could manage. “I love you.” Some reminder he knew she needed to hear. 

“I love you,” she whispered back. “And you need some water and to brush your teeth, you're gonna make me sick smelling like that.” 

A laugh left him in response, shifting to press a kiss to the top of her head. “Love you too, Sugar,” he teased. He pressed another kiss to her skin before he took a step back. “I'll be right out there.” 

It was the last thing he wanted. But if it would calm her, help put her at ease, he'd do whatever she needed of him. He took one last look at her before he slipped out of the door and back down the hall. 

He listened to the music as it played, watching the crowd as they danced. Most were drunk, entirely, which was exactly what he needed then. He made his way past a few toward the end of the hall, bumping directly into one of them with a drink that spilled against his chest. It'd be believable enough, taking a bit too long because of some drunk crashing into him with a drink. 

"We'll have our hands full tomorrow,” he commented as he settled back in his stool, tugging out some of the fabric of his uniform. “Someone's gonna have to drag the drunks out of their beds.” 

“He better give it to another squad,” Beanpole groaned, looking back at him. “It's the fucking worst.” 

The conversation turned from him to the morning, something he was more than grateful for. They were at least far from the most sober themselves. They wouldn't give it a second thought that he'd appeared again. 

He settled back against the wall, listening to the music as it played and Maude Ivory as she sang. He was just waiting, waiting for any sign of Lucy Gray. That she was just fine. But it was getting harder and harder to believe it. 

It took far longer than he would like. Each passing note and song caused the worry in his chest to build. Something could have gone wrong. She could be losing it without somewhere there for her. But staying calm, at least, was what he needed to do. To not seem bothered for a moment no matter how his heart was thudding away. 

He finally felt like he could breathe as he watched Lucy Gray start to make her way through the crowd and to the stage once more. Her smile was plastered right on, shining bright like she always did. As if there hadn't been a moment he'd felt tears falling. 

She made her way over to the mic once the song had quieted down. “We're gonna have to start windin’ down soon, darlins,” she called, something that earned her a few groans in response. “I know, I know. We could party all night, and I’d love to. But we all got to be up bright and early and deal with what we're running from tonight.” 

She adjusted as she was brought over her guitar, getting it slipped on around. There was a quiet conversation between her and Barb Azure, who nodded her head. 

“This next song's a real important one to me,” she started. A bittersweet smile had found its way to her lips. “It's a nice and slow one, one about love,” she added. “It's something I want us all to remember this next week.” Her fingers dragged along the strings, playing nothing that could be connected to a song. “The world feels real scary right now. And we have to remember to have love and hope. They're the only things stronger than fear.” 

The strings being strummed were starting to sound more familiar, something more loved. 

“So, grab someone you love, or someone you like, or someone you haven't told those things but need to. Or hell, grab someone you can't stand. There's some feelings you can work out during this song,” she laughed. “And just enjoy a little bit of love for a few minutes, something to hold on to for the morning.”

The crowd seemed to do just that, plenty of couples were quick to grab hold of one another. Exactly what he wished he could do, make his way over to Lucy Gray and hold her close out on the dance floor. 

He watched as some boy made his way over to the edge of the stage. He settled in front of where Maude Ivory was standing, hand offered out. The girl was flustered, shaking her head as she looked down at him. It was caught quickly by Lucy Gray, who paused the strumming just long enough to touch against her chin, nodding over toward the boy. It took Maude Ivory a few moments before she made her way to the edge of the stage. The boy reached out to grab her waist, lifting her off the stage and to the floor to him. He brought her in close, the two of them giggling. 

That damn Everdeen boy. 

“Everyone's born as clean as a whistle…” 

The start of his song pulled his attention away and back to Lucy Gray. The first love song she'd ever written, one just for him. One that he loved more than anything else in the world. There'd been dozens since then, songs that were just for him, ones of their love, some that could never be heard outside of their home because it was so clear it was theirs. But this one? This one would always be his favorite.

He'd never get over it, the way that she would pour out all of the love that she held for him. She stood on the stage, in front of them all, singing a song just for him. It was bittersweet, knowing just how she was trying to keep it all together. 

His lips curled up into a smile, looking over to his left. He was met with the sight of an empty stool, one that had been empty for years. One he'd shared a smile with the first time he'd heard it. He had to pull his gaze away, focusing back on Lucy Gray as she sang. Her gaze was just over the crowd, enough to where she could keep her eyes on him. She loved him. 

Tomorrow would be bad. The next week would be worse. But for tonight… for a few moments longer, he could hide away into her voice. They didn't have to be anything more than just a boy catching sight of a girl at her show. Like they had all the time in the world. 

Chapter Text

It'd been an early morning, to say the least. He might have gotten an hour or two, not that any of it was actually restful. The early call was enough to drag him out of his bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He'd packed his bag the night before, stuffed it away, and set ready to go once the Reaping was over. 

It'd been hours worth of getting the square set up. It was the same as ever, making sure it looked as organized as it could. They had to put their best into the look for the Capitol. Everything was to make it look as put together as it could. As if District Twelve was anywhere as well taken care of as the rest of them. It was the smallest, the poorest, the least cared for. But they still had to present themselves otherwise. 

He'd been sent to meet the train with the cameramen from the Capitol along with a few others, helping get the cameras and screens set just right. It was busy work, entirely, but it kept him from feeling the exhaustion and the headache that was pounding from the drinks from the night before. It was enough of a distraction and enough of a space that he didn't have to deal with most of the other peacekeepers. 

Suds had been the hardest to drag out, one that had to be tucked against and followed behind to make sure he stayed upright. The fact he was even walking around felt like a miracle in itself, even if he was dragging along. But the last any of them wanted was for him to get in any trouble for not making It out of bed. 

They'd only gotten a break when breakfast had started, all of them half awake and working through the hangover that was gnawing at their heels. It was almost enough time that they could have fallen asleep sitting still for so long. It was almost too much peace, breaking the knowledge of just what the day would be. 

“What are the shifts?” Beanpole’s voice groaned as he finished up the food on his plate. 

“Good ones,” Smiley answered, even though his usual smile was a bit held back. The drink had taken it out on him, just as much as it had the rest of them. “Check-ins, loading everyone up. Don't have to break anything down.” 

“For once,” he agreed. “Wrangling the families too, could be worse.” It was part of it all. There were worse placements for the day. The worst was getting the kids to the stage when they didn't want to move. It took everything to keep as straight of a face, to not show just how upset it made one in fear of it getting caught by a camera for the Capitol. “I'm trusting you with that one. Kind faces are what they need.” 

Their squadron would be spaced around the square, familiar faces along the rows of kids once it got started. Not that it would ever bring much comfort for those pulled. But there were worse Peacekeepers to be settled next to them as they waited.

“Beanpole and I will be at the eighteens, Smiley in the crowd with Suds. Bugs on the stage. Perch on the walkway, out of the camera's way,” he explained, having tried to figure out the best positions for them all. “The rest are spread out. We'll be in charge of making sure the kids get on the train and there's no trouble. Give them space but be mindful. Keep your eyes out.” 

It was all they could do, honestly. Twelve had been relatively peaceful for years now. Outside of the drunken ramblings of the Mayor, and a handful of fights and crimes, they hadn't had much trouble. 

“Check-in table to start should be me, Smiley, and Beanpole. The rest of you will be making sure they go to the right ages. The Twelves usually need a little extra help.” They were all terrified, rightfully so, no matter how small the odds truly were. The worries were all still there in their minds that maybe, just maybe, it would be them. 

He looked around the table, contemplating the conversation before he sighed, eyes landing on Perch for a moment. “There's a change this year.” That was enough to catch all of their attention to focus on him. He could blame it on being on Hoff's good side for knowing just the details. They'd been working for days to make sure everything was just right. This was just another small detail. 

“A change?” Suds hiccuped as he took a sip of his coffee. “That doesn't happen.” 

“It's new,” he explained. He wouldn't put it past being set up just to continue pulling the Victors in to fuck with them. It'd be the exact step he'd expect if he'd been in a role with as much power as Dr. Gaul. “Past Victors are now mentors for the Games. Miss. Baird will be up on the stage alongside Mayor Lipp.” 

The look that Smiley sent was exactly how he felt about it. But he didn't want to let that slip, not then, at least. “And we all know what happened last time they were up there together. Keep them as separate as we can.” As long as they could. She did everything she could to avoid him. That didn't mean the man did the same. “Other than that change, same as always. Let's make it smooth so we get this spot next year.” 

It seemed to be agreed upon, even Perch who didn't snap something ugly about it all. It'd be enough, better than nothing at that point. They'd manage, at least, a few hours and it'd be done with for the most part.

“Wait, what happened last time?” He could hear Suds asking as they'd made it out of the mess hall. It was moments like that when it hit him just how young he was. Not that the rest of them weren't. But Suds was fresh from it all. He'd been there just over a year, right out of school. He was closer to Maude Ivory's age than theirs. He would have been young, and being from a district didn't help the likelihood he'd seen the Reaping in its entirety as he had in the Capitol. 

“It was funny. Some of it, at least,” Beanpole recalled, some nudge against his shoulder as they made their way out of the gate. He'd seen it just the same as he had out in the Capitol all those years ago. “Songbird caused a big scene, slipped a snake down his daughter's back. He rocked her shit, still don't know how he didn't get in trouble for that.” 

“Maybe it was deserved.” Perch. Just as always. Some snide comments about what he thought of Lucy Gray. He was relentless with it. 

“It wasn't.” He hadn't been able to help himself as he sent a hard look over his shoulder. “We all did stupid things at that age. And his kid wasn't innocent either. Look how things ended for her.” 

“How?” Sweet Suds, as curious as he could be. Probably enough to where he could shove his foot in his mouth. 

“She's dead,” Smiley answered, turning around as they walked to look at the youngest of the group. “She got shot, never found out who. Months searching and came up with nothing.” And they never would, not with the guns drowned in the bottom of the lake. “Why the Mayor’s why he is.” It was the nicest way he could likely put it. He was a drunk piece of shit. “It was years ago, though. How many?” 

“Eight to the day since that Reaping,” he breathed. The day never got easier. The hour in the Square would throw her. It'd take days for her to find her balance again. He couldn't imagine what all of this was going to do to her. “Just better hope he's not so drunk he can't speak again. And that it's over quick.” The year before had been rough, barely stumbling through his words. 

He was nearly thankful to see the Square coming into sight, one last run down of just where they needed to be. He'd never been more thankful for a chair, though, as selfish as it was. It was easy to get everything laid out across the tables, far too many names and books to keep track of. It was split between the three of them by the last names. It wasn't a fight to get the table with the first groupings of letters, Beanpole and Smiley just sent him a look when he asked if they had a preference. 

It was all too repetitive the moment the first person made their way toward the Square. There was a long list of questions, ones that could quickly be answered, at least. It covered damn near everything, no matter how boring it came to be with each rotation of questioning. It was simple, mindless, the only time that one would be pulled away to report someone missing from a household. 

A sigh left him as he finished signing a page, glancing over just what he'd written out for anything that might have been missing. “Next.” The shuffling in front of him gave him the knowledge that someone had at least stepped forward. “Last name?” 

“Baird.” 

He could recognize the voice anywhere, though he moved to lift his head once he'd reached for the binder he needed. “One or two?” 

There was a pause, some quiet questioning, sure she was asking one of the older just to be sure before she cleared her throat. “One.” He knew the answer already. But no one else was supposed to know that.

He lifted his gaze to look at the girl standing in front of him. He was sure he felt his heart in his throat, taking in the sight of the younger girl there. 

There stood Maude Ivory, her chin held up as proudly as she could. The same girl who used to bounce her way behind the rest of the Covey to the Square with that goofy little grin. The same girl who was no longer little, no matter how much he wished she was. She was dressed as brightly as could be, tucked away into that damn rainbow dress of Lucy Gray's, those feathers still tired into her wild curls. They'd managed to get it cleaned up and buried away all of the years ago. There was still the same rip in the fabric in the wrist, one he could catch where he was sitting. The same cut from one of the axes swung at her, one that had nicked her.

“How many in the household?” He finally managed out, looking back at the book in front of him. 

“Four.” 

“How many are here?” 

“Four.” 

He scribbled away, nodding his head. “Is there anyone who is 11 as of today that needs to be registered?” It was how they kept track of it all. They didn't exist in the eyes of the Capitol by name until they hit that age. They'd know just how many in the population but not much more. It gave some illusion of safety, one he watched Lucy Gray cling onto.

“No.” 

“How many between 12 and 18?” 

“One.” She paused before she answered his last question before he could get it out. “Maude Ivory Baird.” 

His head nodded, filling out the form before he twisted it to face her. “Fingerprint.” 

The girl made her movement, pressing her thumb against the ink before she pressed it down against the page. She was quick to wipe it onto the table, clearly not wanting to dirty her dress further. 

“Go on,” he gestured just past him. “You'll be in my section, I believe.” 

She offered a smile, nodding her head at his words. “Thank you, sir.” There was the smallest of a curtsy. It was similar to the one that Lucy Gray and Auralee Pearl would do just the same. 

He shifted the binder back toward himself, flicking the page to the next. Where one Baird went, the rest were soon behind. “Next.” 

“Baird.” From the one word alone, he could hear just how exhausted Lucy Gray was. He didn't have to look up to know that she likely hadn't slept that night. 

“How many in the household?” 

“Three and a half?” The answer was enough to cause a laugh to leave Smiley beside him.

He lifted his gaze to look up at her, offering a smile. A friendly face, something he could write off as that alone. Nothing more. Not that his heart could thud out of his chest at the sight of her. 

There she was in a dress that looked a little too big for her. It gave her a bit of space, ruffled and colorful to help try and distract from it all. If someone looked close enough, between the reds, greens, and whites, they'd catch sight of the roses tucked into the pattern. It'd been sent from Tigris years before, hidden in the bottom of a care box. It'd looked enough like a blanket that it had seemed to slip right through. 

From straight ahead, not a soul would likely notice the bump, which was something she wanted quiet until she just couldn't do so further. She'd look like the colorful Songbird that she was for Panem to see. One covered in roses, another small sign she was his.

“Three, I'd think,” he offered, looking up to her. AJ was settled in her arms, a sight that he shouldn't be surprised by. No matter how much they told her otherwise, she'd carry him until she was about to pop, just as she had with Auralee Pearl. She was peeking over the table as he scribbled away, curious as she could be. 

“Three, three, no, zero, no one,” Lucy Gray spoke after a moment, already knowing the questions about to come her way. She shifted her hand out, letting Auralee Pearl help her get it pressed against the page and signed. 

He gave a smile, watching as Auralee Pearl leaned over to give Smiley a high five as it was offered to her. “You should be good. Bugs will take you up, Miss. Baird.” 

“Thank you, Sergeant Snow,” she breathed, a gentle nudge to Auralee Pearl's shoulder before they started past him. It took everything in him to not watch the three of them. He had other things to focus on, even if all he wanted to do was hold Lucy Gray's face and keep her steady.

“Snow!” Hoff's voice caught his attention, looking over his shoulder to where the man was standing. He gestured over, causing a sigh to leave him before he motioned for Suds. 

“Follow the list,” he explained, sitting the youngest down in the chair. “Find the last name, fill out the form, get the fingerprint. Smiley's right here if you need something.” He got a nod, as nervous as he looked, but he took it as an answer either way. He reached for his rifle, settling it over his shoulder, starting over to Commander Hoff. “Sir?” 

The older man gestured just past him to where Lucy Gray was passing the kids off, leaving sweet kisses on their faces. “Your credentials were approved and dropped off this morning. You’ll be joining Miss. Baird in the Capitol.” It took everything in him to not let out a breath of relief. He’d been prepared to go either way. “There’s some packages you’ll need to pick up before you go.”

He nodded in understanding, looking back to the man. “Yes, sir.” He’d get to keep track of her, at least, that she wouldn’t be alone. And even more so that she wouldn’t be with anyone else, especially not Perch. 

“Don’t forget, Sergeant Snow. Best behavior.” A warning in itself. They had to keep mindful and aware of all of the eyes that would be on them, especially Lucy Gray. “Don’t make me regret this decision.”

“You won’t, sir.”

The man nodded over toward where Lucy Gray was. “You have someone up there with her?” It was unspoken knowledge. They all knew just how unstable Mayor Lipp could be and how unpredictable he was on a regular day. The Capitol wouldn’t do a thing about him, more than sure that he just wasn’t enough trouble to pull him from the spot. 

“Bugs. He’ll be keeping a distance between them.” It wasn’t that Bugs was by any means someone that was intimidating. But he could keep a grip on the situation. He was someone he could trust, one who wouldn’t let the two of them get too close. 

“Good.” There was another nod. “Get her up there. Cameras will start up soon.”

“Yes, sir.” That was more than enough for him to move, shifting his grip on the strap of his rifle. He made his way over to Lucy Gray, settling beside her. “Miss. Baird.” 

A sigh left Lucy Gray as he spoke, dropping a last kiss to Maude Ivory’s cheek before she sent her off. “Sergeant Snow?”

“They need you up on the stage. Just this way.” There was the displeased look as always, tilting her chin up as they made their way down the aisle toward the stage. “Bugs will be up there with you.” 

She nodded at the idea, looking a little more at ease as they walked. “Think I’d get away with punchin’ him in the nose?” 

A small laugh left him at the idea, shaking his head. “I would love to see it. But, I don’t think it’d end up well.” 

“Worth a shot,” she sighed. “Ask for forgiveness, maybe?” 

“Maybe,” he reasoned, shifting to offer his hand out to help her up the steps to the stage. They were as rickety as they could be, ones he hated walking himself. 

She shot him a look, the same unimpressed look Auralee Pearl would send his way at times. It’d put on a good show, at least, the way she shifted to curl her fingers in her dress to lift. It pulled up from her ankles, starting up the steps on her own. She’d look stubborn, far from wanting a thing to do with him. 

He followed after her, eyes catching sight of where Mayor Lipp was standing. He looked like he was wobbling on his feet, more than sure the moment he stepped any closer he’d smell the alcohol on him. He wouldn’t be surprised if he’d be stumbling through his words while up there. 

Lucy Gray started toward the chair that was set up for her, having to slip past where the man was standing. It was quick, the way the other man had reached out and grabbed Lucy Gray’s wrist in passing. Her head lifted, eyes narrowing at the sight of him. “Mayor Lipp.”

“Lucy Gray.” 

As Coriolanus took a step forward toward them, Lucy Gray shook her head at the sight. “It’s alright,” she assured, twisting her wrist in the man’s hold as she looked up at him. “He don’t know better, certainly won’t remember today.” It was almost a coo, a soothe, eyes focused on the man in front of her. 

“You never should have made it back here.” It’d been something that Lucy Gray had heard plenty of times. It was the exact thing that Dr. Gaul had made such a point of before he’d been sent here. She shouldn’t have survived, for a different reason than what the Mayor’s bitterness was from. 

“Oh, I know it, darlin’.” It was the teasing tone she used the night before with Perch. The same one that laid thick and she’d been cooed over with a camera thrown in her face in the zoo. “But here I am, and,” she took a step closer, nearly looking sick at the wave of alcohol she could smell. “I'm the Capitol's most beloved Victor, what they said just the other day, and we got ‘bout three cameras on us right now.” 

Her head turned to look around them, some sickly sweet smile on her lips. She was an angel. Only a handful had a clue that she'd harmed a soul in the arena. “They see you grab me again, Mayor Lipp, they'll have a noose ‘round your neck before I leave on that train.” Not that Lucy Gray would be against it. She'd hoped for the man to try and touch her again. Her wrist twisted, giving a sharp tug to lose his grip on her. 

“Miss. Baird,” Coriolanus breathed, sending her a look as he gave her shoulder a gentle nudge. It was all it took for her to move, making her way over to her space. He watched as she got settled, adjusting her dress around herself. “Really?” 

“Already hates me,” she offered her same excuse for the night before with Perch. It was the kind of recklessness she'd slip every now and then. It was the exact same as she'd pulled that snake from her pocket years ago. “We're ‘bout to start, Sergeant Snow. Might want to take your place.”

A small sigh left him, taking in the sight of her for a moment. He'd just have to trust she'd stay in her spot, to behave how she needed to. He glanced back, more than grateful to catch sight of Bugs making his way up the stairs. “Stay with her.”

“I'll try.” 

He gave Lucy Gray one last look before he made his way down the stairs. He had to try and let himself relax, to focus on what was on hand. Even though he wanted to keep sight of her. He moved to his spot, catching sight of Maude Ivory. He settled to face the stage in front of him, glancing to where the girl was. 

She had settled herself at the edge of the line, right next to where he was. It was nearly comforting, knowing she was right there, that he could keep as close of an eye as he could on at least one of their kids. 

It was painful, honestly, listening to Mayor Lipp stumbling through it all. It was the same as always, rambling away about the Dark Days and the reason for the Games. It was something that could be quoted by all of them, one that he was sure he could hear in his mind at night while he tried to sleep. 

He kept his gaze on Lucy Gray, the way that she was trying to keep herself steady. He could see that from afar, trying her best to keep from wrapping her bump with her arms protectively. It couldn't be hidden forever but at least for a moment. 

“The Eighteenth Hunger Games will be the start of a new era. Each District will be sending a former Victor alongside their tributes to be their mentor for the Games. Past Victors will be taking over this role to ensure that the message of the Games is not forgotten once they have won.” Mayor Lipp sent a look behind him to where Lucy Gray was sitting. “Let us remember the 10th Games, in which District 12 had its first and only Victor.” 

A far too familiar voice sent a chill through his body as his gaze turned toward the screen. The face of the woman on the screen was one he had wished he'd never see again. That maybe she'd keel over one of those days, or that one of her creatures would finally get here. But it was obvious that it hadn't happened yet. He could only hope one day it might. 

“The 10th Games is one of the most celebrated. It was seen as a success despite the attempts from rebels to end the Games. It revitalized and changed how they are played to this day. Despite this, it is the least documented of the Games to date. Due to the bombings and issues with recordings, there is limited footage of the victory of Lucy Gray Baird.” 

That didn't make sense. It didn't make sense at all. And he wouldn't put it past the woman to have tucked it all away due to the failure in her eyes of the Games.

A clip of Lucy Gray flashed across the scene, the exact same clip when he'd first caught sight of her. It was directly after her name had been called, starting down the exact aisle he was standing in then. 

“This was the first Games to be broadcasted and hosted as it currently is.” The screen flashed up a picture of Lucy Gray on stage next to Lucky. It was odd, entirely, how anyone would believe for a moment that there was no footage from it all. “Lucy Gray Baird aided in making the Games the show that it is to this day.” He barely believed the words coming from Dr. Gaul, that the woman would ever want to admit it aloud. 

His gaze turned to Lucy Gray, seeing the way it looked like she wasn't breathing. She was staring straight ahead, trying to keep that sweet look on her face. Though he could see the way her nose was twitching, fingers curled up in the fabric of the dress. 

“It was the first Games to include the Mentor role, filled by a Capitol Academy Student-” 

“Shit.” The soft voice took him off guard, turning his head just enough to take sight of Maude Ivory. She was staring forward at the screen, eyes as wide as they'd ever been. 

Shit?

His brows furrowed, following her line of sight to just what had thrown her off. “Shit.” 

There on the screen was a picture from their time in the Games. It was in black and white, inside of the hall. Lucy Gray was sitting at the table, looking down in front of her. And there he was standing in front of her, his back to the camera, thankfully. No one would have a clue it was him, at least not here, outside of them and the Covey. 

He could feel his breath hitch in his chest, watching the picture as it changed. It was from inside the control room, Lucy Gray on the screen, wrapped in the snakes crawling as she sang. He was half turned toward the audience, knowing he'd been listening to them begging to get her out. It was far from his whole face or even much of his identifying features but it was enough that he felt the panic rise in his chest. 

He glanced around them, looking for any sign of someone connecting it. Maybe one of the other peacekeepers was making sense of it. He gripped a bit tighter to his rifle, not even close to paying attention to what was being said. Which only made it worse. Gaul easily could have slipped his name, fucking everything over. This wasn't good. 

“- the winning District will be rewarded greatly. It is in the best interest of the Mentor to ensure that one of their tributes can survive.” Dr. Gaul's voice was haunting, even as his eyes were still searching around them. 

His gaze glanced around, trying to catch if anyone was looking at him oddly. 

“No name.” Maude Ivory's voice again, as if she could read right through his anxious movement. It had always been a worry for them, part of trying to just keep their past quiet. No one needed to know how they'd actually met, sure it would just cause more trouble. 

It caused him to let out a breath that was nearly in relief, shifting his rifle in his hold as his attention tried to focus back on the stage. As the anthem echoed through the quiet Square, he watched Mayor Lipp as he made his way over to the bowl of names. There was a stumble in his step, pausing just long enough before he reached into the bowl. 

The man cleared his throat as he made his way back to the mic, opening the small envelope as he read it over. “Marigold Cartwright.” 

He felt a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding leave him at the name. There had been the briefest of moments, the moment he'd heard the start, that it might be the girl beside him. There was the smallest of a glance to Maude Ivory, watching the girl blink her teary eyes closed. Relief. 

She was safe. 

It took a few moments before the girl made her way down the same aisle, watching her as she started slowly up the steps. He recognized her. Her family owned the shoe shop, one that he'd been in a handful of times. She had a head of hair the same color as Maude Ivory, an often tell-tale sign of someone who lived in the Merchant district.

“Cove Belrose.” Another name he recognized, watching the boy make his way up without hesitation. He was dirty from the mines and hadn't even attempted to scrub most of the mine dust from his face. 

He lived out in the Seam, in the opposite direction of the Covey. But he knew the name and the face, one that had caused plenty of trouble of his own. It'd never been anything to get him tossed into holding, more times than not a warning and being walked back home. Vandalization of old houses and stealing, a handful of a kid that they'd all groan about when they'd hear his name. He just needed a chance to do better. 

Something that he didn't know if the kid would ever get now. 

The anthem began to play again, an empty echo once more. It was chilling, watching the two kids up on the stage. It never got easier. It'd been something he'd thought of so differently back in the Capitol, even more so with their birds. 

He gave a small look around, shifting in his spot to look over to Beanpole. There was a small nod at the sight of him, one last glance to Maude Ivory before he started up the stairs alongside the other man. 

It was simple enough, making his way over to stand in front of Lucy Gray as she moved to stand. Any lingering focus of the footage on the stage would be blocked enough as they made their way into the Justice building. 

“Just wait right here,” she instructed the two tributes, who paused as they heard her voice. “You’ll go in different rooms, have some time before the train.” She looked far from at ease but he could tell just how much she was trying to keep it together. As if she could be the one who had all the answers. Her touch was gentle, reaching to tap against Beanpole’s arm. “You take Marigold in, and Bugs, you’ll have Cove. Get them settled and once their families get here, get them some food and water before we leave, please.”

“Yes, ma’am.” 

“And some extra for us to take with us. It’ll be a long ride.”

That made his brow furrow, glancing over to her at the idea. Every time he’d rode that damn train, even when he’d been young, they always had food served to them. Even if it was nothing more than a sandwich, it was something. They had never had to worry about bringing food along with them.

The sight of her, her hands wrapped protectively around her bump, hit him at once. Lucy Gray had never been on a train like that. At least not in one of the passenger cars. She’d been in the damn cattle car, locked in the dark on her own. 

Was that where she would have to go again?

He shook his head like he was trying to clear the thought of it from her mind. “They’ll have thirty minutes. Just keep up with that.”

“An hour.” 

His head turned back to look at her, a breath leaving him. “Thirty minutes. They have to be on the train in an hour. The train leaves in an hour.”

“No.” He was almost sure she was arguing just to argue with him at that point. “Train leaves in two hours. From the time the anthem played for the last time. You can get everything loaded up before they get on. Simple enough.”

He blinked as he looked at her, raising his brows at the sight. If it were anyone else, it’d be completely ignored. But it was Lucy Gray. It was a lot easier said than done. “Forty-Five.” He turned his head to look at the two in his squad, giving a nod. 

He watched as the doors to the Justice building opened, Smiley and Suds making their way inside with the families in tow. They were likely as opposite as they could be, aside from being from opposite ends of the district. It wasn’t often that someone from the Merchant part of town had their name pulled, unlike the Seam. 

Marigold nearly had a room full of family members led off into the room by Beanpole. He recognized them, for the most part. There were a handful of siblings, her parents and her grandfather, who had run the shoe store since he was Marigold’s age. It was bound to be loud, filled with emotions, something they’d hear through the door. 

Smiley had his arm linked with an older woman, one that he knew was Cove’s grandmother. She was the face that they’d usually have to meet on the step with the kid in tow, sighing at the sight of him in trouble yet again. Behind them was a little girl, following close with her hand linked with Suds. She couldn’t have been much older than Auralee Pearl, by any means, rushing off to the boy in the room once the door opened. 

It wasn’t until the doors shut, the quiet in the hallway seeming far too much, did any of them speak again. “Forty-five minutes. Watch the clock.”

“An hour and fifteen.” Lucy Gray sounded so final. As if she held all of the answers, looking around at the five men. There was the harshness in her stare, the kind that would make nearly anyone cower in their spot. “No less. Equipment can be loaded on the train by then.” 

“Yes, ma’am,” Smiley answered, giving a small nod, something the rest of them seemed to copy too easily. 

A sigh left Coriolanus, looking between the four of them in disbelief before he nodded. “Go get the food, I’ll go help load up once you all get back.”

His gaze turned back to Lucy Gray as he heard footsteps retreating, some sign that the rest of them had turned to leave. It was quiet, too quiet, eyes locked with one another with some silent argument. One that he was sure would be hashed out the moment that they were truly alone, even if it was a few days from then. Lucy Gray could hold a grudge like no other. 

“I got a question.” The voice caused a small laugh to leave Lucy Gray, who turned to look at who the voice belonged to before he did. 

Suds.

“What is it?” He asked, shifting his rifle to settle onto his back. The kid would do it more than he’d like him to, avoiding the task by standing and asking questions. It was something their kids would do themselves. 

“Do all the guys in the Capitol look like you?” 

He felt his breath falter in his chest, brows raising as he looked at the younger. Had he noticed? Was Suds of all damn people going to be the person that pieced it together? “Like me?”

“Yeah. Are they all blond and tall?” 

“No. Not all of them. Beanpole isn’t blond.” 

Suds nodded, seeming to be thinking far too hard about it as he looked at the two of them in front of him. “Did you know the guy?”

“Who?” Lucy Gray asked.

“Your mentor? Did he know him?”

Too well. His breath calmed in his chest, glancing at Lucy Gray at the idea before he nodded. “Yeah, went to the same school.” He shrugged his shoulders, looking over the younger. “Why?”

“Just wonder what people from the Capitol are like. Other than you and Beanpole, you guys are pretty good, I just always heard stories about them back home,” he reasoned. It sounded like more than anything that he truly was just stalling at that point. “What was he like?” 

“An asshole.”

“He was okay,” Lucy Gray answered, looking up at him. “Bit of an asshole but found a way to live with that.”

Suds nodded, smiling at the thought. He still hadn’t figured out the kid, not yet. Sometimes he reminded him how Maude Ivory had been when he’d first arrived. He just wanted to follow someone around and observe, to try and make others laugh, to ask a million questions before lunch. “That’s cool.” 

“Go help pack up the cameras.” He gestured toward the door. “I’ll be out when they get back.”

“Yes, sir. Gent, sir.” The younger nodded, giving Lucy Gray that cheesy grin at the sight of her. “Miss. Songbird.” 

“Suds.” 

That seemed to satisfy him enough, one last nod before he turned to head out the door. It left the two of them in the quiet of the hallway, the only real noise muffled in the rooms they were near. 

He waited a few moments in the quiet, taking a few steps back, and Lucy Gray followed suit. “What was that about?”

“My old mentor.”

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.” His voice was hushed, just for them both, trying to catch her gaze even though it was set forward. 

She was lost in that far-off look, the one that felt all too empty, all too frozen in her exact spot. The one he wanted to wrap her up during, one that he rarely was able to do so. “I didn’t get to do goodbyes.” 

“It wasn’t a thing yet?”

“It was.” She sounded just as distant as her voice did, her head tilting. “Has been since the first. He wouldn’t let the Covey inside because of the snake.” She’d been alone, for however long she’d been in the room by herself. “Not even in the building. Thought it was fair punishment, plus the busted face.”

“He’s also an ass.”

“He is.” They all knew it. Every soul in the District knew that to be true. “I was scared. And alone. And all I wanted was a great big hug from my Mama.” Not that it would have been possible, not truly. “That it’d all be okay. That it was all just a bad dream that she was gonna take away.”

Except it hadn’t been. It’d been real. Something that was caused because of someone that she had loved and trusted. 

“You know the odds just as well as I do.” He did. At least one of them wouldn’t make it back. There was going to be a loss no matter what. “And if, please, if one of them does make it back… the person being hugged and promised it’s okay isn’t the same person.”

She sounded so scared. She sounded so lost. Like she was stuck back at sixteen years old begging to get to see her family one last time. 

“It’s the least they deserve. Just a few extra minutes held in arms that are safe.” They deserved more. But it just wasn’t possible. Not truly. Not now. “It’s what ours would deserve.” Her voice was barely loud enough, her arms around herself tightening at the thought. 

The door opening interrupted the thought that was about to slip past his tongue, sighing a bit at the sight. “You three, keep an eye on her,” he instructed, nodding his head toward her. “An hour and a half. But they need on the train right after. If you need anything, I’ll be out getting the train loaded. Where are your bags?” 

“Hoff’s.” 

He nodded at the idea, sending the three of them a look. “Don’t let Lipp in here.” 

“We won’t,” Beanpole promised. 

The hour and a half felt like it dragged on forever. It was even more busy work, it felt, than it had that morning. No longer was he feeling the same exhaustion that he had for most of the day. Instead, it was a restlessness, a want to just try and fix everything around him. It only made everything that much more frustrating for him. 

They’d done damn near it all, between all of the Peacekeepers that were on deck. They’d repacked the train and the supplies from the Capitol itself without much issue. He’d helped clear out the square of anyone lingering around. He’d gathered Lucy Gray’s bags as well as his own and gotten them loaded into one of the compartments. It was just everything he could to keep busy. 

Anything was better than sitting with her voice inside of his head. It’d been something that would worry her from time to time, of course. The Reaping threw everyone off as it was but this felt that much worse. He had to do whatever he could to keep her stable enough, for herself and their unborn child. She had to take it easy, to be aware of everything that was running in her brain and the stress it was doing to her body. 

It would all be easier said than done, knowing just how mindful they needed to be out in the Capitol. It was simply work. He was nothing more than a friendly face in the sea of Peacekeepers that would be around. One that wouldn’t spook her nearly as badly as the ones from the Capitol did. 

An hour and fifteen minutes was the exact amount of time he had given himself to make it back to the Justice building. It’d been a passing by, catching sight of Beanpole and Bugs guiding the kids toward the train itself. They’d be on the train in time, along with everything that they’d need to take. They’d be off right on time, just as they’d been requested. 

He’d made his way into the building, and was met with what he was sure was quiet weeping from one of the rooms. Smiley and Lucy Gray were nowhere in sight, one of the doors shut in the hallway. The one that Cove had been within was open and quiet, settling himself beside it. 

He watched the clock on the wall, ticking away the remaining minutes they had. Exactly seventeen minutes later the other door opened, straightening up to stand as he met Lucy Gray’s gaze. Just behind her were the Cartwright parents, holding onto each other for dear life. And beside them, Smiley was still helping keep Cove’s Grandmother on her feet. 

“Miss. Baird-” 

“Just a second,” she whispered, her attention falling back on them as they left the room. There was some soft exchange, Lucy Gray all to in it at the moment. He could only imagine just what was going through her head, how much she was silencing as she tried to be the one who could let them hear what they wanted. 

He didn’t move until Smiley had managed to round them up, helping guide them out of the building. His attention fell back onto Lucy Gray, watching the way her head was tilted down, blinking as quickly as she could. Whatever it took to hide it all, to keep the tears from falling anymore that day.

“Ready.” 

He nodded, following alongside her out of the back door. It was quiet, the entire walk, something that drove him wild. She was always filled with noise, all of the Covey had always been. Even in the most peaceful moments, hidden out together by the lake, there’d be some song moving through her. But all that was there was this aching silence, one that made his ears ring. 

She looked exhausted like everything of the day had finally hit her. She was moving a little slower, her arms as protective as they could be around the bump. As if it would make any real difference in the world around them. That maybe, just maybe, if she held on a little tighter, she could make things so much better for the lives around her.

The only sound that left her was the shake in her breathing as the train came into view. Her fingers curled up in the fabric that she was clinging to, the smallest of trembles in her hold. She was terrified of it all, even if she’d put on a pretty show saying otherwise for every other person she’d seen that day.

There was a near breath of relief that left him as they followed the path of the train cars. There wasn’t a single cattle car attached, something he’d not fully gotten to see as he’d carried supplies out. Most of the cars looked like the ones that he’d taken out to Twelve when his Peacekeeping career had begun. Benches, something she could lay against and try to rest. And windows, something that would provide the light she’d once searched for so greatly while in the dark of the train. “Should be one of these.”

Her head nodded, glancing around them with a small frown. It was the most emotion that she was likely going to allow herself to show. “All of the bags?”

“All of them,” he assured. 

“The file?”

“The file?”

She nodded back, in the direction he assumed was the base. “They sent a big file for you. Gaul, I guess,” she spoke quietly. “Supposed to take it with you, credentials and rules. Can’t get anywhere without the badge.”

“I’ll be right back,” he assured softly, smiling at her. He’d have enough time to get there and back before it was too late. 

And he did, which was something that thankfully didn’t take long. It was sat on Ms. Laurel’s desk, the door to Hoff’s office closed and voices coming from the other side. It was better to just take it than to try and interrupt, sure whatever conversation it was, he didn’t want part of it anytime soon. 

He’d just started around the last bend of the train station when he’d felt frozen to his spot. Further down the way was Lucy Gray, exactly where he had left her. She hadn’t moved an inch, her grip still tight around her bump. Her face was empty of everything, staring up at the person in front of her.

There was no mistaking just who it was, even with how similar some could look with the buzzcut. Perch. His hand reached out, nudging her chin up to keep her from pulling her eyes away from his own. 

Now wasn’t the time, no matter how much he wanted to make his way over and bounce the man’s head off of the corner of the train car. He had to make it to the Capitol with Lucy Gray. He couldn’t let this fucker throw it off now. 

He couldn’t hear what was being said, though it didn’t look like Lucy Gray was responding. Her stare was just hard like she was ready to reach out and break his nose herself. But there she stood, as still as she could, like maybe he’d disappear. 

Movement from the corner of his eye caught his attention, Suds finished loading the last of the equipment in one of the last cars near him. He didn’t have to say a word, a simple nod of his head once he’d met his gaze had the kid rushing over to him. 

“Yes, sir?” 

“I need you to do something for me.” Before Suds could even ask, he reached and patted against the younger’s chest. “No questions, no lip, just do it. I’m trusting you with this.”

That seemed to be more than enough, watching as he seemed to stand up a bit taller. Something important, a task that only he could take care of. Likely one of the first tasks that any of them hadn’t gone easy on him about. “Yes, sir.”

“You stick to Perch like glue while I’m gone.” He watched the confusion cross the kid’s face, sure it was just that. He was the last one to ever want the two of them to spend time together. But he was the only one who could get away with it without the man thinking any differently. “Where he goes, you go, on all shifts, everywhere, say you’re wanting to learn from him.”

“I-” The look on his face must have been enough to quiet any argument to the idea that the other had. “Yes, sir, Gent, sir.” 

“Don’t leave him alone, you got it?” As he nodded at the request, his hand reached to rub along his head. “I’m counting on you, kid.”

“I won’t let you down.” 

He nodded, taking a few moments before he gestured just past him to where the man was. “Go around and toward the front, meet him there.” He watched as Suds nodded, giving one last smile before he did just as he was told, disappearing on the other side of the station. “Miss. Baird!” The call was around the corner, giving the man a false sense of privacy. As if he hadn’t seen the grip that he’d had on Lucy Gray and was going to get away with it after he got back. 

By the time he made it around the corner, there was no sign of Perch anywhere near Lucy Gray. She was still frozen in her spot, it taking far longer than he’d like for her to adjust and notice him there. There was some attempt at a smile, one that would normally work, but this time he saw right through it. 

“You okay?”

“Just fine, Sergeant Snow.” 

Before he could try to ask, trying to get anything out of her that he could, the sound of the train whistle filled the air. It was as shrill as it could be, watching Lucy Gray’s face scrunch up in discomfort. 

He offered his hand out to Lucy Gray as they made their way over to the train car where he could just make out the head of the kids. There at the top of the steps to the car was one of the other Peacekeepers, a face he’d seen before but only across the mess hall in a different squadron. He’d likely been the closest person to sit with the kids while the rest of them finished up the loading. It was a brief nod shared, the man making his way down the steps and out of the car past them. 

“After you, Lucy Gray.” 

Her hand reached back to take his, something that they could easily brush off as needing help up the stairs. He could feel just how tightly she was gripping, the longest amount of time they’d likely have until they had some privacy. He didn’t miss the shakiness in her steps, the way that she was as careful as she could with each step into the car. 

She was holding on for dear life. A hold he hadn’t felt since the moment they’d walked into the arena hand-in-hand all those years ago. A hold that he’d have to release just the same as they made their way up the steps to their car, to the audience that they had once more.

Chapter Text

The train ride was excruciating. It'd been something that had nearly sent him over the edge the first time he had taken it out to Twelve when it had just been him. Somehow, it was even worse with others in the car with him. 

It'd been just the four of them, for the majority of the ride. Outside of the stops they made to Districts, where his broad shoulders blocked the door of the car. There had been a check or two, to make sure that all inside were still alive. But to know the way the other three inside of the car usually were and to be met with the silence inside made him uneasy. 

He'd done his best to not pace, no matter how restless he became. The three of them were spread across the car as if trying to avoid one another. But it was silent. Even Lucy Gray, which was never a good sign in his eyes. 

She'd not said much, outside of a few small attempts at trying to talk to the two of them. She was sitting facing away from them, eyes glued on the back wall of the train car. There was just such a blank look, one devoid of any emotions. There was some smile that stayed stuck there, something to try and be reassuring, even though it didn't match the rest of her face. 

The tributes were avoiding each other every bit. Even when they'd make eye contact, the look of annoyance and disgust was clear. He was sure there was some issue from school, more than anything. Or that he'd caused enough trouble around the Merchant's part of town that she just had it against him.

He glanced out the window, watching the world go by. He recognized it, at least, moving to stand from where he'd been settled. He made his way over to Lucy Gray, tucking down next to her. “We're about to enter the Capitol. About fifteen minutes out from the station.” 

Her head nodded, not pulling her gaze away. Her touch turned to pull away from where she'd been wrapped around her bump, pushing back her curls from her face. “Thank you, Sergeant Snow.” It took her a few moments before she twisted and pushed herself to her feet, trying to steady herself against the movement as she gripped the top of a booth. “I need you both over here, please.”

The girl moved, at least, making her way over to one of the booths in front of Lucy Gray. The boy, however, stayed exactly where he was. He shouldn’t be surprised, by any means, he had always been a bit of trouble. He gave anyone a hard time if it was possible. 

“Cove Lyle Belrose. Over here. Now.” It was her Mama voice, which he rarely heard even around the kids unless it was something terrible. The full name was always a terror to hear, something that would have made him shrink if he had heard it himself. 

It seemed to have the same effect with the way that the boy moved even as he grumbled. It was near to the same tone that he had heard used when he’d be dragged by his ear back to his grandmother. He rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms, leaning his head against the glass of the window. 

Her fingers gripped, looking over the two of them. He couldn't read the look on her face, too many emotions were trying to push past the gentle smile she had. “We'll be in the Capitol very soon. We'll be put into a car and taken to a building. We have a…” she paused, glancing over to him. 

“A floor,” he completed the thought. 

“A floor, thank you,” she cleared her throat. “We'll be at the top floor, it's very high up. There's food and beds and a training area.” She'd been scouring through the package that had been sent to him. She'd been reading every piece of paper inside, trying to know every detail even if she wasn't meant to. “And you'll be taken down there once everyone's in and will be there for a few hours. And we need to… be good. No matter how angry or upset we are, there are rules and the Capitol is not the place to lash out. I've seen that first hand.” 

She was met with silence.

“During dinner, we’ll have a talk about our plans. Get this figured out. You two are going to need each other.” 

A scoff, this time from the girl instead. “I’m not working with him. He’s an asshole.”

“Yeah, I’m not working with that bitch.” He shouldn’t have been surprised. Not with the way the two did everything they could to avoid him. 

He watched Lucy Gray’s fingers grip a bit tighter to the bench behind her, trying all she could to keep her face as gentle as she could. “First, we’re not using that language to talk about each other. And especially not in front of me. You can think it all you like, but we ain’t saying that.” It took her a moment to look them over before she shook her head. “We’re going to be kind to each other if not anything else.”

“What does it matter?” The boy asked, furrowing his brow at the sight. “At best, one of us makes it back. Just one. Who cares if we don’t want to deal with each other?”

She sighed, shifting to sit on the edge of the bench facing them as best as she could. “It matters because you will need each other. You’ll be surrounded by so many people, some that are here to help. And people who know about the Games, like myself or even Sergeant Snow.” He didn’t miss the glance from them both. “But in there, in that arena, the only people in there are you two.”

“And twenty-two other people trying to get out. It doesn’t matter,” Cove scoffed, rolling his eyes. 

“But it does,” Lucy Gray stressed, looking between them both. “I wouldn’t be right here if it weren’t for mine.”

“The one who chased you?” Marigold questioned, looking far from like she believed a word she said. 

He watched the frown settle, the way her hand anxiously ran along the top of her bump. “Jessup,” she answered as if any other explanation of him simply wasn’t allowed. “He kept me safe from bats on our train ride and got sick. He protected me. I barely knew him but we promised we would take care of each other because we were all we had. And that’s all you two are going to have in there. You can make friends with others, you can pretend you have all these alliances, and that don’t matter when you’re in there. I watched supposed partners turn on each other for not getting to be the one to gut a kid.” 

It was harsh. But it was what they needed to hear. A harsh reality of the world they were going into. 

“You can hate each other all you want, I don’t care, even if it’s over something like he pulled your pigtail in first grade.” Her gaze was a bit harsh, searching over the two of them. But there was no doubt that they were listening to her. “But what you are going to do is respect each other. And try to take care of each other. Especially around other people before the Games. You can yell at each other all day on our floor, but in front of every other person, you are to be a united front. There’s safety in numbers. And there’s safety in trusting each other.” 

Silence, the two turning to look at each other instead. It was like they were too scared to speak first. Of just who would say the next thing and just if it would be the wrong thing. 

“We know the odds. We know what might happen. But I do not want the last thing either of you do to be filled with hate toward each other.” She sat up, glancing behind her toward the window. “You two figure your shit out and take care of each other. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Thank you.” A sigh left her, her gaze falling onto him. “You’ll both have Capitol Peacekeepers assigned to you once we get there. They have instructions to fire first and ask questions later. No running, no fighting, as best behavior as we can have. They’ll stay at the entrance of our floor. Sergeant Snow will be staying with us as well, inside. He’ll be their point of contact. He is here to keep us safe and to ask those questions first. We were lucky enough to have someone familiar with us. We will be kind to him as well, is that understood?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

Her head nodded, taking a deep breath to steady herself. Her face was softening, as was the sternness in her words. “I can’t promise this is going to be okay. Or even close to it. I know our odds. But I am going to do what I can to help and to make sure you’re taken care of as much as I can, every way that I can. If you need anything, and I mean it, you come to me. Or you go to Sergeant Snow. Okay?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” 

“Thank you,” she soothed, nodding her head. “Just do your best. That’s all you can do.” Her fingers reached, offering her hand out to both of them. It took a few moments before they both reached to take the outstretched offer. “I am already so proud of you. And so are your families. And they love you both so much,” she reminded softly. “You need to remember that, no matter what.” Her fingers squeezed tight to them both before she pulled her touch away.

It was the first time he was sure he’d ever seen the boy get that emotional, forcing his gaze away to try not to show the tears that were starting to build up. It was like the reality of it all was finally there, on their shoulders. There was no longer denying it, not as the train station pulled into view. Where there were as many Peacekeepers and cars as the eye could see. 

It was quick work, once the train had come to a stop. Once everything had been gathered and loaded out, they were led to a car. Just as Lucy Gray had told the kids, there had been the Peacekeepers waiting for them once they got off. He was sure it was a safety thing, in some way, but more than anything it was about the control. It was the fact that there were as many of them as they could be, something to intimidate, to keep the Tributes from wanting to try and run. It had them in line, there was no denying that.

The car ride was shorter than he’d like, eyes nearly glued out the window. He could excuse it as being on edge, as to try to stay on top of it all. Though he and Lucy Gray both knew he just couldn’t look away. Not then. Not when he was finally back home after too long, trying to take in every change that they passed. It was overwhelming, in a sense just how… different it all felt. Even if it was his home and things that he had known for years were still there, it just felt… off. Like trying to hang the perfect picture on the wall but when a step was taken back, it was just barely crooked. 

It’d always been the dream to get back there. It would be the safest. They would be safe. But at the end of the day, it was easier said than done. It’d been far easier to have left District Twelve during the Fall after the 10th Games before life had gotten more complicated. And even if he stayed for twenty years out in Twelve, what would happen afterward, once the assignment was over? 

The more he sat with the thoughts, the more his head started to get dizzy. It wasn’t right. It wasn’t something he needed to try and focus on, not just yet. At least not when the kids were awake and moving. Though he knew himself. He knew that it would sit at the base of his mind and gnaw away at him. That every glimpse of the life before would feel like it was pulling him back under. 

And honestly, he almost wanted it to drown him again. 

The skyscraper they’d been placed in was in the perfect view of the arena. A stark reminder that it didn’t matter how much they tried. The end was right in view and there was no getting away from it, no matter what they did. Dr. Gaul’s plan, no doubt, sure every single thing was planned to the smallest detail. Not only would it affect the tributes, the ones who knew what was awaiting them, but their mentors as well. They would have to look at the place where they’d won, as violently as it may have been, and be reminded even when they tried to rest. 

He’d stayed close to Lucy Gray as they loaded onto the elevator, watching how her grip had tightened on her bag as she pressed against the wall. She’d never been in one, that became more than obvious as her breath sucked in as the elevator started to lift. He added a bit of pressure against her side, something to remind her that he was right there. 

It took her a few moments as the doors opened to their floor for her to seem to find her footing. She gave a small nod to the tributes, something as an attempt of reassurance before she made her way off of it. She looked on edge, her gaze searching around her with each step. 

“I’ll be in there with them,” Coriolanus started, watching as Lucy Gray and the two younger started off. “I’ll let you know if I need assistance. But you’re not to enter without permission and certainly not without me in there.”

“You’re joking, right?” One of them asked, looking unimpressed. “And why is that?” 

“Request from the Gamemakers for the Victor. She’s to be left alone by the two of you unless it’s an emergency,” he explained. “Dr. Gaul herself does not want her bothered.” It’d been something she’d scooted across to him on the table. He pulled out a small envelope and passed it over to the man. “And neither do I.”

A breath of disbelief left the man, shaking his head. “Ridiculous.” 

“Take it up with Dr. Gaul if you like. I wouldn’t though.” He had already started toward the door, moving to let the three of them inside. He sighed as he shut it behind them, eyes falling on the three of them. “There should be rooms for you both, go ahead and pick it, just that way. They should be coming to get you in just a few minutes.” He watched Lucy Gray as she shifted the strap of her bag on her shoulder, fidgeting with it as she looked around. “I can show you yours, Ms. Baird.”

Lucy Gray rolled her eyes as she looked back at him, sending him a look as she nodded her head. “That’d be great, Sergeant Snow.” It was all just a show, something that they’d been putting on for too many years. And it was still just as ridiculous.

“Just this way,” he offered, making his way past her toward the room. It was at least a bit further away and would allow for some sort of privacy. He could see the look on her face, searching as they walked. “What?”

“Nothin’, just,” she sighed, following him into the room. “One single floor is probably three of our homes.” Her lips were pushed together in a frown, tossing her bag onto the bed. “Was I too harsh?” 

“On the train?” When he earned a small nod, he shook his head, settling his bag down by the door. “No. Could have been meaner.” He saw the look she gave him, a small chuckle leaving him. “They needed to hear it.” 

Her head nodded, letting her eyes scan around them like she was searching for something. For what, he wasn't quite sure. “We have a meeting,” she started, pushing back a few curls from her face. “Once all the kids are down.” 

“Papers?” 

“Papers,” she agreed. She'd barely slept, from what he'd caught, scouring through every piece of paper that had been sent for them to know before the Games. There was no telling just what she'd seen or read. And honestly, he didn't know if he wanted to know. She nodded her head over toward a door, not saying a word as she gestured him over. 

His brow furrowed, making his way after her into the bathroom. “What are you doing?” He asked quietly, watching as she flicked on the sink. 

“There's cameras on the floor,” she explained softly. She'd always been the first to catch sight of them without having to try. “It's just a note in the papers, I don't know how many or where. But I don't wanna risk us or the birds because we missed one.” 

It was fair. It was clear thinking. It was one of those small details that she likely let get bigger and bigger, wanting to make sure everything was just right. They had to be mindful, safe, and whatever they needed to make it right. “I'll look,” he promised. “And you don't need to worry about the birds.” 

Her eyes rolled at the suggestion, shaking her head. It was something far easier said than done, he knew that. 

“The Covey's not going to let anyone near them. And Suds is-” Suds is staying on Perch’s ass. Because we saw him bothering you when I was gone. What was he saying? 

Before he could get his question out, a knock sounded on the bedroom door itself. “Ms. Baird?” Cove's voice sounded, causing Lucy Gray to sigh. 

“Comin’, darlin’,” she called back, seeming to be straightening herself out as she turned off the sink. “Cameras.” 

“Cameras,” he agreed, giving her a smile at the small peck she gave before she slipped out of the bathroom. He'd give it a minute, something to pace between just in case.

He took a minute before he came out, letting his eyes scan around the bedroom before he made his way onto the floor. Another sense of safety. Another sense of control. As much as he didn't want to admit to it, he understood. No matter how much he didn't want to. 

He made note of every camera he caught sight of. And the longer he looked, the more he wondered if they were real or not. If it was nothing more than a show to keep them in line. He tried to give them some sort of space, listening to the soft conversations. 

As much as she'd chide the two, or have to be a bit harsher than she'd like, there was still the softness. There was Lucy Gray, doting and soothing with anything that was asked or trying to keep them steady. As if she wasn't holding on for dear life herself.

A thud on the front door had her nearly jump, giving them a small nod. “No fights, best behavior, listen to the people in charge, they might say something that will help. We'll have dinner when you get back up, okay?” She soothed, the two giving a nod. She glanced back at him, giving him her little smile. “Can you get them taken care of, Sergeant Snow?”

“I’ve got them,” he assured her, making his way back to the front door with the two in tow. “If they do anything or are too rough, you let me know. I’ll take care of it. Listen, pay attention to everything, stay together. Don’t let them separate you.” Once he had an agreement from them both, he opened the door, eyes falling onto the men waiting. “What time will they be finished?” 

“1800,” one of them answered. “They request the mentor sign them out tonight, she’ll need to pick them up.”

If she’d still be on her feet by then. “We’ll get it taken care of,” he assured. He watched as the other gave the kids a small nudge forward, starting further down the floor to the elevator. He waited until the elevator doors shut, sighing as he made his way back into their space. His eyes fell onto Lucy Gray, who was standing in front of the glass panels. She looked frozen in her spot, looking out across the city. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine.” Her breath was trying to steady, he could see the way that she was trying to keep from rushing out of her. “It’s not about me, Coriolanus.” She mumbled. “Worried about them.”

He nodded, settling next to her as he crossed his arms over his chest. He was sure exactly what she was staring at, no denying from just where they were standing. They could see right into the arena. It was more decrepit than it ever had been, the hole in the roof seeming to have only gotten larger over the years. He could imagine what the rest of it looked like, how destroyed it had become, forever changed from their Games. “You have to take care of yourself while we’re here. Taking breaks and everything you need, okay? I’m here to help, send me wherever. Beck and call,” he reminded her, watching her roll her eyes.

“I don’t need nothin’,” she scoffed, pushing back her hair from her face. “I need a hard drink, actually, but…” she gestured to the bump, shaking her head. “I’m fine. I think you're worrying and putting it on me.” 

A sigh left him, looking over to her before he looked back out at the arena. “Probably.” He was worried. Too worried. But they had to keep it together, at least until it was just them. “There's four. Cameras. None in the rooms. I don't even know if they're set up or real.”

“Just be careful. Keep your hands to yourself, know that's hard for you.” There was another little tease in her words, trying to make it all… easier. There she was, trying to comfort him instead. She sighed, finally pulling her gaze away from the window. “We should go.” 

She was still just as uneasy as she had been on the first ride of the elevator, careful in her touch against her dress. He could see the way she was trying to be mindful of her bump, trying to keep it away as much as she could. Her fingers were just curling up, over and over, some nervous habit to stay steady. 

“Do you know what it's about?” 

“Think it's just… everything,” she reasoned. “Our rules, expectations, what to avoid so we don't get shot.” She sounded bitter. But she'd never had a good experience with the Capitol Peacekeepers. Even before her Games. 

“Good behavior,” he reminded her. 

Her eyes rolled at the comment, sending him an unimpressed look as the doors opened. “Don’t have to tell me, Sugar, you need to remember that,” she teased softly, making her way off of the elevator.

He followed after her, staying close as he let his eyes scan around them as they walked. There were far too many Peacekeepers lingering around, too many faces to even try and make sense of. There was an all too large room with doors open, sure it was meant for the meeting itself, able to make out a few people inside. 

“Victors only.” A voice nearly boomed as he paused outside of the doors, turning toward it. He raised his brows at the sight of the man. He looked familiar, far older than most of the other Peacekeepers lingering around. And from the way Lucy Gray seemed to tuck behind him, she must have recognized him just the same. 

“Is that a smart idea?” Not that he felt most would be a danger. Most, he was sure, had just been wanting peace that they were likely yanked away from. 

“It’s the rules.” The rules. The stupid fucking rules. 

He was already moving to argue, to try and give some exact reason why it just wasn’t going to happen. But he felt a touch against his arm, glancing behind him to where Lucy Gray was still tucked away. 

“It’s fine,” she soothed, giving him a small nod. “I’ve got it.” He didn’t know how much he believed it all. But at that point, he just had to try to. There was nothing else he could do. At least not then. 

“I’ll be right out here,” he promised, watching as she nodded and made her way into the room. He hoped more than anything that she’d just sit quietly and behave. It would be easier that way, to not say a word and get through it all. 

He sighed as he stepped away from the doors, moving to settle in the lobby. It was a waiting game, watching as people came and went through the doors and into the lobby. It was making him more and more uneasy, the more people that moved passed him, just… watching. He didn’t know who most of them were, though he’d seen a handful before in passing. The Victory Tour had come by each year, as brief as the visits were, ones that he’d worked. But the years had all felt like they rushed together like all of the faces had done just that. And trying to piece together who any of them was far from easy. 

“Can I get a smoke in before?” A voice asked, questioning the Peacekeeper that had been waiting at the door. “I’m Capitol. Don’t have to be babysat, do I?”

“Have to take one with you.” 

A groan left the voice, a sound that caught his attention, his brow furrowing as he seemed to focus on just who it had come from. The man the voice belonged to had seemed to be scanning and landed on him, his brows raising. “That one.”

Shit.

He was motioned over, a sigh leaving him as he took in the sight of the man. He’d only gotten older, some attempt at a beard that didn't seem like it'd ever grow that much. He looked less baby-faced than he once had, though it was strange to see him like that. 

“Ten minutes. Don't let him out of your sight. Take care of it if he tries to leave.” A reminder of the gun that was settled across his back. As if he'd ever use it against another. “Those doors.” 

He nodded, giving the other a look before he started out the doors. He shouldn't have been surprised by it, by any means, trying to let himself relax where he was settled. 

“Holy shit.” He at least waited until the glass doors had shut, moving to slip a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, along with a lighter. “Never thought I'd see your face again.” 

Coriolanus chuckled at the thought, shaking his head. “Can't get rid of me that easily, Festus.” Eight years. They'd both changed, just like the Capitol had itself. “Why are you in there?” 

A sigh left him as he took a drag of the cigarette, tilting those red curls back. “Not all the Districts have won,” he answered, shrugging his shoulders. “I fill in.”

“You?” 

He nodded, breathing out a puff of smoke. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “Would have been yours, if you hadn't gone to be like your father.” Was that what they'd all been told? No longer such a scandalous thought, or that they'd been expelled? But rather he'd left right away to follow in his father's footsteps. “Not fun. I don't enjoy it. But it's good pay. Keeps Persephone from having to work.” 

“Persephone?” He questioned, looking the man over before his gaze landed on what he was sure was a wedding ring. “You finally made a move?” 

A laugh left Festus, something that made it feel all more normal. As if he'd never left the Capitol like they were waiting around for their next class rather than anything else. “Yeah, I sure did,” he agreed. “Took me a while but finally grew a pair.” His hand twisted to show his ring after he took a drag. “Three years.” 

“Damn.” He was sure it'd be a ridiculous wedding, too fancy, too many people and celebrations. But he was sure it'd been nice. “Congrats, by the way. You're happy?” 

“Happy,” he agreed. “We're, uh, well, she's expecting,” he started, scratching at the stubble on his face. “January. Don't think it's hit me yet I'm going to be a Dad.” 

“It's a big change.” He would know. And well, even then… it wasn't the same as it would be if he could be there every moment. If they lived here, or if he wasn't in the Peacekeepers. If he could just be with them. “That's what I've always heard, at least.” 

“You got any?” 

Three. Almost. They're the best things to happen to me. I love being a Dad. I'm scared of the world that they're left in being in the Districts. I want them here instead. 

“No. Married to the job.” He was supposed to be, at least. No ties to the District. No ties or loyalties to people other than the Capitol. And he'd failed entirely. He'd failed the moment he'd paid his last few dollars to be sent to Twelve in the hopes of seeing Lucy Gray again. “District Twelve's where my heart is.” That wasn't a lie.

“District Twelve?” He questioned, taking another drag from his cigarette and raising his brows. “As in… that District Twelve? The District Twelve with your Tribute? The one I saw you kiss?” 

He had. Or, well… Lucy Gray had kissed him. She'd found her way into his arms, where he had held her, and she'd pulled him in for a kiss. A kiss that had driven him wild, that had made his head spin like no other. The kiss that he'd been completely lost for her after. “Last District my Father was stationed in.” An easy enough excuse.

“Right.” Festus looked like he was far from believing it. “Wait, if you're here, does that mean you're her Peacekeeper escort? Is she here?”

“She's the Victor for District Twelve,” he reminded, clearly ignoring the rest of the question. “Which, she's in there. Do you mind keeping an eye on her during this?” 

“Professionally or personally asking?” Festus asked with a laugh, taking a last drag of the cigarette. “Yeah. I've got her. Unless she starts causing trouble. I'm keeping my hands clean.” 

That was fair enough. And she had quite the reputation. She could lash out, could entertain, but she was seen as the angel of it all. Her hands were clean from the Games. She'd soothed Jessup as he died, she'd sang to the snakes, she'd never hurt a soul. She could run her mouth all day but more times than not, it led to giggles and gossip. No one knew, for a moment, outside of the two of them just what she'd been truly capable of. 

“Thank you,” he spoke, his hand moving to pat against his shoulder. “You're going to be a great dad, Festus. Just love ‘em. That's what's most important.” 

“Thanks, Coryo.” It'd been a name he felt he hadn't heard in far too long, and even longer from someone he used to be close to. “Maybe you'll get to be back soon. That'd be nice. All of us together again.” 

“That's the goal.” Safety. Order. Protection. Their kids could be safe. So could Lucy Gray, far away from what felt like a risk out in the District. However he had to make that happen. 

Once Festus had stubbed out the cigarette, he followed him back inside. He'd at least have someone in there with Lucy Gray’s wellbeing in mind, even if she might strangle him if he knew. He could only stand back and watch as he made his way into the meeting and the doors shut behind him. 

It was odd. The silence that came from the room. Not a sound came from inside. He was expecting something. Some voices, some groans, some complaints that fluttered through the wood doors that wouldn't be able to hide all of the conversation. But it was doing just that. Silence.

The longer the silence grew, the more uneasy he felt about it, eyes glancing up to the singular clock on the wall. The time was just ticking away, with not a peep from the other side of those doors. He'd pay to be a fly on the wall in there, to hear just what was being discussed. 

“Sergeant Snow.” The use of his name had thrown him as it was. Even more so the voice that had called it. A voice that he'd heard in his head all too clearly reading the letter to Lucy Gray. The voice that had rattled in his brain during the train ride. 

He straightened himself out, nodding his head at the sight of the woman. “Dr. Gaul.” 

She'd only aged over the years. The hard stare that had always been one they were fearful of had continued. She looked harsher than ever before and just as mad of a scientist as she had always been if not worse. “Welcome back to the Capitol. I was glad to see your name turned in to accompany Ms. Baird.” 

“Thank you, ma'am.” Cautious, entirely. “Though, I think we can both agree that she shouldn't be here.” 

A chuckle left the woman, the same sound that had always stilled them when it'd echoed through the classrooms. “Of course she shouldn't.” Her voice lowered, meant just for him to hear. “There should have been no Victor in those Games.” 

“She should never have been in the Games in the first place. Her name wasn't on the slip that the Mayor pulled.” Sejanus had been the one who pointed it out. He’d whispered to him that Mayor Lipp hadn't even glanced down at it as he called her name. Like he knew it wasn't going to be there. And it had only been confirmed by Mayfair that night at the Hob. 

He couldn't place the look on Dr. Gaul's face, just what emotion it was as she glanced him over. She likely didn't believe him. Or it'd been the idea now nestling into her brain. That some stupid little Mayor in a District had fucked over the validity of her Games. “I'm sure I'll see you again soon, Sergeant Snow.” 

“Yes, Ma'am.” One way or another, he was sure. No matter how much he wished he never would. He watched as she made her way to the meeting doors, the first sound from inside escaping as she slipped in. 

He was sure he could picture how Lucy Gray reacted to the sight. That she had sunk into her seat, had likely tucked away as best as she could like she had from that Peacekeeper. They hadn't had good interactions. She was likely at the top of her shit list, of who she would get rid of in a heartbeat. But Lucy Gray was too loved by others to touch a hair on her head. 

Which was something that would always have to work in their favor. It was something that they had to hold onto more times than not. It was the exact reason why not a soul had thought Lucy Gray had a thing to do with what happened at the Hob, outside of the Mayor. The exact reason so many people seemed to eat out of her hand. Everyone loved her. None as much as he did though.

He watched the minutes tick away, eyes locked on the clock. It dragged on, longer than he would like it to. He had never been a fan of patience. Especially when it came to waiting to see Lucy Gray. Every moment felt like it was dragging like he could feel every breath he took, every thud away in his chest. 

His attention turned toward the door as it opened, Dr. Gaul made her way out alongside the Peacekeeper who had seemed to be in charge. Not another move was made, as if everyone was waiting for just what to do. 

The first face appeared from the meeting room, looking far from happy. Not that he was expecting anything close to it. But any attempt at friendliness, any attempt at peace had been clearly wiped away from whatever had happened there. 

He watched as faces came out the doors, watching as most of them went out to the Peacekeepers waiting. One or two must have been Capitol, from the looks alone and how they moved without someone following right along after them. 

Nine. Nine faces. Nine that he couldn't place. No Festus. No Lucy Gray. That didn't make him feel any better. But he didn't know if he needed to make his way in or just trust that she would show her face.

A tenth face appeared from the other side of the door, some taller girl that he couldn't place, a dark blond head of hair that reminded him of Maude Ivory. He was waiting for her to make her way over to the Peacekeeper who had taken a step forward. But she headed straight for him instead. 

“Are you Coriolanus?” His head nodded before he could even ask just why. “I'm Mags. Uh,” she glanced back over to her shoulder as she seemed to be thinking. “Festus? He told me to come find you? It's Lucy Gray.” 

Her name sent a rush of panic through him, following after the other back into the meeting room. His eyes scanned the mostly empty space, landing on where Lucy Gray was tucked in a chair at the edge of the table. It was clear even from across the room how out of it she looked. It was the same kind of panic that he'd seen only a handful of times. 

She was staring off, looking right at him but not even registering that he was there. She looked ready to cry but refused to let the tears fall. Her fingers were curled up in her dress, trembling, the one true sign to anyone just how bad things were. 

“What happened?” 

“I don't know,” Festus answered from his chair next to her, where he'd likely been trying to get her up before he'd come in. “It was bad. The meeting. It got… nasty.” 

“There was lots of yelling,” Mags added from where she was standing by the door. “No one was happy. We don't want to be here but… some of it is really bad.” What would that even mean? How bad?

“Gaul said she's singing.” Said. A refusal to give her a choice. It was expected. Just like her coming to the Capitol. “Lucy Gray told her no.” Best behavior didn't include Dr. Gaul, it seemed. “Then she said something about a gem? I don’t know, it happened so quick. And then she got like this. She's… not moved, she won't answer. She’s just… stuck.”

He nodded, making his way around the table toward Lucy Gray. “A gem?” 

Festus nodded as he moved to stand, taking a few steps back to give him space. “Yeah. An emerald, I think? I don't know what she meant by it.” 

“Pearl.” Mags spoke once more, causing his head to turn to look at her. 

“What?” He asked, furrowing his brow as he tucked down in front of Lucy Gray. There was still nothing in her gaze, outside of the tears threatening to fall. 

“Pearl. Not an emerald. A pearl.” 

Shit. 

His fingers were as gentle as he could manage, reaching to touch against Lucy Gray's cheek. It could be blamed on just trying to stir her back to sense. It could be blamed on his job. But he didn't care, not then, not when she seemed so distant. “Lucy Gray?” 

Between the touch and the call of her name, her head pressed into his palm. It was a gentle movement, a slow blink before she lifted her gaze just enough to meet his. A shaky breath left her, a sound he recognized of the small dam she had put up being ready to break. The same near whimper that had left her that night at the zoo. 

His eyes searched over her face, wanting nothing more than to kiss over her face to try and soothe her. There were a million things he wanted to promise her, a million things that he wanted to do for her. But none of it was something he could do then. No matter how much he just wanted to scoop her up and carry her to safety. 

“Let's get you upstairs. Away from all of this.” She'd been on edge since the moment she'd stepped foot on the train. Hell, even before then, it had been. It'd been years of this, hadn't it? Years of being spooked by any little creek or any broken twig, just like she'd jumped out of her skin out in the meadow. “Get some rest.” 

It took far longer than he would have liked, with slow blinks and seeming like she was resetting herself. She was putting herself back together, trying to settle that smile on her lips that was always too convincing. He shifted to pull his hands away, taking her fingers to help her to her feet. He watched the grimace, the way her face seemed to twist in discomfort. 

“Is there some kind of medical?” He asked, looking over to Festus. He knew more than he did, at least over the last few years when it came to the Games. “Or something?” 

Festus nodded at the question, giving him a smile. “Yeah, I'll get someone sent up. Usually for the tributes but figure she counts.” She should, at least. 

“Thank you.” He shifted to let Lucy Gray press a bit closer against him, keeping a gentle touch to her elbow. It was enough to keep her upright, next to him, as he tried to guide her out of the room. 

“Can we come check on her?” Mags asked, voice soft as they started past her to the door. “Later tonight? Make sure she's okay?” 

His head nodded in agreement, something to try and soothe. “I think she'd like that,” he admitted. “Thank you both, really.” He was as gentle as he could manage, leading Lucy Gray back to the elevators. Alone. Alone was exactly what they needed. He pressed the floor button, keeping tucked In with Lucy Gray as the doors closed. “It's okay.”

Her head shook in response, tilting her head back to look at the ceiling of the elevator. She was trying to fight back tears, listening to the sniffles that left her. She looked like she didn't believe a word he said. Like she had just caught him in a lie. “It's not.”