Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The people around me have always romanticized the thought of finding a soulmate. That there is always someone for everyone. Having words scarred into your body from the moment your born so show you are destined to find true love. "Ugh it must be nice to know you have an actual person who's made for you, lucky motherfuckers.", I'd hear my friends fantasizing and wishing they had been born with a soulmate.

Yeah so fucking lucky. How the fuck am I lucky that i have these stupid words on my body. Why the fuck do I have these words on my body? My family doesn't come from a line of soulmates. They practically don't exist anymore. Finding your soulmate has come down to a one in billion type chance. At least my words are in a spot that no one can see. I can't let anyone see them.

"I don't understand why you guys make such a big deal out of soulmates, you realize there's a huge chance that you'll never meet them. I haven't met anyone that has a soulmate, have you?" I looked up at my friends from the floor. They both shook their heads. Dylan sighed, "It's just a nice thought to have."

My friends Dylan and Alex had came over to help me pack. So far my closet is completely empty and the dresser is almost done. I may need to sell some clothes, I can't bring all of this with me. I'm moving out to Seattle, Washington to attend Seattle University. I need a fresh start. I'm ready to figure out life and grow. A new environment is calling my name. Especially after..

"What day did you plan on heading out again?" I looked over to Alex, who was texting away on their phone. "Sam was wondering, she wants to go out partying one last time before you go." I got up off the floor and face flopped onto the bed between Dylan and Alex. "I h~ven't ~ a ~ate ~et. I fig ~ed ~ce ~ver ~ ing w~s p~ck~ , i'~ ju~t g~t ~ ~d ~o." I guess we can go out tonight or tomorrow for a send off. We are almost done packing. "Dude what the fuck did you say, everything was muffled." Oh yeah, my face is in the bed.

I lifted my face off the bed to be able to be heard, "I haven't set a date yet, I figured once everything was packed, I'd just get up and go." I sighed. "We can go out tonight or tomorrow if yall are up for it. I can finish the rest of the packing in the morning. Thank yall for making this whole moving process easy for me. You guys are the best, I'm really going to miss yall."

Dylan and Alex were already leaning down onto me to give hugs. "Bitch if you don't stop I'm going to start crying. This isn't goodbye. We're going to go out and party and have an amazing fucking time. Then you'll move and we're going to be coming down and visiting." Tears were already forming in Dylan's eyes as she spoke. "God yall are so fucking dramatic." Alex voice cracked. "We're going out tomorrow night and we'll make it as memorable as possible. I'll send a text to Sam right now and let her know the plan." Alex pulled out their phone and typed away.

"Be sure to let her know that one bitch isn't invited. We want to have a good night." Dylan had tried to quietly let Alex know. "You're really bad at whispering." I sat up to look at my friends. "And it's not a big deal if she's there. I'm leaving soon and I've moved on from her. She means nothing to me anymore." My friends looked at each other then back at me.

"We just want to make sure you have a great night out with us, it'll be the last one till we come down and see you." Dylan had started to rub your back soothingly. "We care about you and we're aware of the damage she caused. I personally don't want her there, for my mental state and yours but mainly mine since you've moved on. Fuck that bitch." I have such amazing friends. She's right, fuck that bitch. I deserve a drama free last night out with them. "Yeah, go ahead and let Sam know that I said I don't want Alice there." They both looked so excited. "That's what I'm talking about!" Alex practically jumped onto me. "I'm letting her know right now."

I'm glad I have supportive friends. I never gave them the full details on what happened between Me and Alice. I mean, how do I even tell them. Alice wasn't the one for me. Her first words to me didn't match the ones scarred onto my body. I knew that and I chose to stay. I was fine with settling for her. Until she tried to undress me. I know, i should've seen this coming. I thought i could push it off... forever.? I don't know, I wasn't thinking clearly. I wanted to feel like everyone else. To date whoever i wanted.

"......'ll see you tomorrow, would you want to go out to eat before hitting the club?" Aw shit I zoned out again. "You okay buddy? Want us to spend the night with you instead?" Dylan was looking at you concerned. "Seemed like you went somewhere else for a sec." I shook my head. "I'm okay," just hiding a secret from yall and definitely not thinking about how me and my ex broke up due to the possibly of her seeing the start of the faint scarred words on my body. "Im just feeling anxious about this move. You're good to head home, we can meet up for dinner before our night out."

Both of my friends nodded their heads looking a little unsure. "Okay buddy, we'll see you at dinner." Alex leaned in and gave me a big hug. "I'm going to come by with coffee and muffins in the morning to help you finish the rest of packing." Dylan joined in on the hug. I feel so loved, I'm going to miss my friends so much. "Thank you guys again for being so amazing. Be safe on your drives home and I'll see you in the morning Dyl." We got up and made sure they had all of their belongings before they left to head home for the night.

Wow, everything is starting to look empty. I should take one last relaxing bubble bath before I pack away the bathroom items. I made my way to the bathroom and turned the faucet on to start filling up to tub. I began removing the clothes from my body, looking in the full body mirror. My eyes trailed my body examining it, stopping at the words. These stupid fucking words. My hand reached to touch the words, tracing each letter with my fingers softly. Someday I'm going to make this disappear. I took a deep breathe and turned away from the mirror to step into the bath.

I wonder how college is going to be actually being there. I've been attending through online. Why am I suddenly deciding to move? Is this something that I really want? I let myself sink further down into the tub. Has Alice mentioned anything that she saw to Sam? I hope she thought it was just an old childhood scar. I didn't really give her the chance to ask. I sat up and started to wash my hair then body. I gotta stop letting my thoughts get to me. After rinsing off I got out of the tub and dried myself. Wrapping myself in the towel, I walked out of the bathroom into the bedroom.

I think I'm going to leave and make the drive up to Seattle after tomorrow night. The sooner the better. I grabbed some boxers from the dresser and put them on. Am I slightly trying to run away from the possibility that Alice might have, more than likely seen something. What am I even freaking out about? What if she didn't even she anything and I just ended things for no reason. I see one of my anime shirts and grab it to wear to sleep. I get into the bed, under my soft comforter. My phone on the night stand lights up. There was a text, I don't bother to fully look. Getting comfy, I drifted off to sleep.

*alarm tone*

uuugh I feel so sleepy. What time is it? Was that seriously my alarm to get up already. It doesn't feel like i got any sleep. I threw the covers off my body and got out of bed. Stepping out of the bedroom and down the hall to the living room I see that Dylan is already here. mmm the coffee and muffins smell so good!

"Good morning! How'd you sleep?" Dylan cheerfully smiled at me. "Good morning Dyl, I was feeling dead but the smell of this coffee has brought me to life." I laughed grabbing the drink Dylan got me and took a sip. "Thank you so much for bringing me this" I kept sipping on the coffee since it was still pretty hot. "There's no need to thank me, I wanted to do this since it'll be a while till I get to see you again. Plus you're my best friend and I love you, so deal with it" She laughed looking up at me from the couch. I grabbed my muffin and took a bite. "So uh, did you see the text from the group chat?" I shook my head no. "My phone is on the night stand, I haven't checked it." Dylan sighed.

"You know you're a really close best friend of mine and that you can always tell me anything, right?" She looked at me like I was a timid animal. "Yes Dyl, I understand that completely." I looked at her confused. What is she talking about? Fuck, I should've checked the damn text. "Do you.. have.. uh... something.. on your.. body?" She asked me sounding unsure. I looked at her lost. "What?" Something on my body? Dylan hesitantly continued, "Like.. something.. scarred.. into your.. body." I felt the color drain from my face. "It's not a big deal if you do, I think it'd be really amazing" She spoke softly to me.

"Amazing?" I finally met her eyes. "How is it amazing that I could probably be spending the rest of my life hoping that I run into my soulmate." What's the point of hiding it anymore, this is Dylan. Wait, What made her question me? "Why would you keep this from me, and Alex? We're your best friends. We tell each other everything. This is big! This is amazing! You have a soulmate! Oh my god, can I see the words? What does it say? I had a hard time believing Alex whenever they text in the group chat, so I had to ask you myself." Dylan sounded so excited.

She's not upset with me for not telling her. So Alex had asked first I guess. Alice probably said something to Sam whenever she was told she couldn't come out with us. "You have to show me please! You know how much I love the fact that soulmate exists. It's the least you can do since you've kept it from me for so long!" Dylan was practically jumping on the couch now.

"I'm sorry I've hide it from you Dyl, thank you for not being upset." She got off the couch and walked over to hug me. "There's no way I could ever bet upset about something like this. It's so magical" Dylans words bring me comfort, yet I can't bring myself to be happy with this. "Magical? Dyl.. I have scarred words that tell me what my soulmate first words are to me. Has it crossed your mind as a thought that those first words might not be sweet, or loving, or even the least bit something magical. That I have to pay so close attention to my first words to someone and how they reply. It's an empty feeling. Especially with it being a one in a billion chance of meeting my person." I watched Dylans face drop with each passing word. Fuck, I think I hurt her feelings. "Yes, I agree that soulmates are magical, just not in our world. In a world where the probabilities are a one in ten chance, It would be magical. That's just not our world Dyl." She nodded her head, seeming like she understood.

"Let's go finish up this packing." She let go of me and headed towards my bedroom. I grabbed her coffee and followed her down the hall. "I'm comfortable with showing you.. it." Dylan looked over at me from the suitcase, smiling a bit. "Really?" Her mood perked up. I nodded my head. I set our coffees down on the dresser. "It's something I know you've always wanted for you" I began lifting my T shirt to reveal my boxers. I grabbed the hiem of my underwear and pulled down the right side a bit to show my scarred words. Dylans eyes lit up.

"OH MY GOODD!!" She moved fast from the suitcase to my side. "Can I touch them?" Her hand already hovering. I nodded. Immediately feeling her fingers trace the words. "I hope you come across your soulmate sooner than you think" She said breathlessly. "This is so beautiful, I'm sorry you have the feelings you do towards them." I felt tears come to my eyes. I wish I could be as hopeful as you. I truly believe my chances are low of ever meeting my soulmate. Dylan stood up and gave me another hug before moving back to the suitcase to keep packing. "The Universe works in mysterious ways buddy, you wouldn't have a soulmate if you weren't destined to meet. And I can wait till I get to tell you I told you so." She smiled big at me.

She really thinks that I'm going to meet them, and that she'll be able to tell me I told you so. I chuckled at the thought. "We'll see about that Dyl" Yall continue to finish up packing your clothes. "Have you thought about what you're going to wear tonight?" Dylan asked before putting the last of my shirts into my suitcase. "No, I haven't."

I've been thinking I should just leave after we're done packing. I don't want to have to deal with any more questions about my scar. Fuck, I'm going to have to reply to the text soon. "Do you want to borrow some of my clothes, or we can go to Alex's and use some of theirs?" I got pulled out of my thoughts by her question. "I was actually wondering if I should head out today instead of tomorrow.. I don't want to really face anyone else.." I zipped up my suitcase.

"You do want you feel is right." I looked over at Dylan to see her already smiling. "I can see where you're coming from and I'd do the same. Let's go load up these suitcases into your car. You have a long drive ahead of you." She grabbed a few of my bags and her and headed out the door. I'm so lucky to have a supportive friend like Dylan. I picked up the rest of my bags and followed after her.

Once we packed everything up into the car, I walked Dylan over to her car. "Tell everyone at dinner tonight that I felt like this was something i needed. I want yall to go out and party hard for me. I'll text Alex whenever I get to Seattle." I leaned in to give Dylan a hug. "There's no need to worry about any of us. Everyone will understand. Good luck at living in dorms. Let me know whenever you get there please." She got into her car and left my place.

I went back inside to double check that I have everything and that the place was clean. Leaving and locking the door behind me. I got in my car and drove to the apartment office and dropped off the keys to the apartment. This is it. I can't believe I'm moving to Seattle. Walking back out to the car, I opened my phone and pulled up the directions. Having my playlist set and playing, I started my one day and 5 hour drive.

Chapter Text

Holy fuck this place is huge! Look at that tower, it looks like it has a ufo on top of it! Its so beautiful here. I pull up to the campus and made my way to the central office to find out about my dorm. I had gotten an email this past week about my dorm being ready to move into. Finding the line I needed to be in, I waited patiently for the next office to be available. It wasn't too terrible long, within 10 minutes there was a student walking out letting me know that I can head in.

"What can I help you with" The secretary asked me without looking up from her computer. "I was notified about my dorm being ready, I was wondering what number I'm in and how do I find it?" She quit typing for a second then started to move her mouse around before clicking on a few things. "First and last name." I gave her the information that she asked for and watched her type away. "You'll be staying in Champion Hall on the 8th floor room number 420. Your roommate is already settled in. Ms. Anderson, will you come here please." The secretary looked over to the right calling to someone down the hall.

"Yes Ms. Harris?" I almost let my jaw drop seeing her walk into the office. She's beautiful to look at. "Will you show them around campus and the way to their dorm please?" I felt their eyes shift to me. I look from the secretary to the girl. Her mouth moved up into a smirk. "Yeah, I can do that. You ready for your tour?" She said motioning for me to follow her. Alright, here's your chance at a fresh start and new friends. Don't get weird and fuck this up. I followed her out of the main office and more into the campus.

"Before I get completely started on this tour, let me introduce myself. My name's Abby, and I also stay in Champion Hall just on a different floor so if you ever need help, feel free to reach out to me." I gave her a smile and let her know my name. "Thank you for this, I know it's kind of your job, but it's nice to have someone here to help me." We began walking through the campus.

Abby was pointing out the different buildings and what classes where taken in them. She showed me the where to the Cafeteria, Coffee shops, Library, Activity center and the other Dorms were located . This whole place is amazing. I can't believe I'm actually going to be attending college here. "Lastly, here's our dorm building, Champion Hall." I knew I was on the 8th floor, I just wasn't expecting the building to be this huge. Abby walked into the building and straight to the elevator, pushing the up button.

The doors opened and we stepped inside. "You're on the 8th floor right?" She waited for me to nod before pushing the button. "You don't talk much do you?" Abby was looking at me with a slight smile. I looked down at my feet, "I talk, I'm just taking in the new environment. This is completely different then from where I'm from and you're the first person I've met since arriving." If felt Abby shift a bit in the elevator. "So where are you from?" The doors of the elevator began to open up, we stepped out onto my floor and went right to look for my room. "A small town in Texas." She chuckled a little bit next to me, "I was trying to figure out where that slight accent was from."

We reached my dorm room 420. "Alright, here's this peace of paper. It has my phone number on it along with my room and floor number. If you need anything, feel free to text me or come by." Abby patted my shoulder before walking off down the hall, leaving me to stand outside my room. I wonder if my roommate is home and inside or if I'm going to be walking into an empty dorm. Should i go get myself stuff or check out the place first. I'm going in, I'm dying to know what it looks like.

I put my key into the door and unlocked it to step inside. So far it looks empty. Walking into the dorm it looks like i stepped right into the living room. To the right of me there was a bar counter that led into a decent sized kitchen. I stepped more into the dorm looking around. There was a Tv on the middle of the wall to the left between 2 doors. The door to the right of the Tv was cracked out a little and had posters on the outside of it. I guess that's my roommates room. The door to the left of the Tv was wide open. I walk towards the open door and notice there's a door to the left it, it's the bathroom it looks like. I heard few thuds and bangs but didn't pay them any attention.

I continue to walk into the door that was open and see a single empty bed in the middle of the room. There was a built in closet in the room and doubled as a mirror. Alright, this is my room. I turn to step out of the room to head to my car to start grabbing my belongings. "Oof." I felt myself bump into something and fell onto my ass. "Oh my god I'm so sorry, I was coming up to say hi, but you turned around before i got the words out. I didn't mean to knock you onto your ass. It probably didn't help that i was also running." I looked up at the girl slightly stress giggling. "I'm your roommate Dina" She reached at hand out to me. I grabbed it and she helped me to my feet. Oh wow she's pretty. I introduced myself to her and let her know not to worry about me falling. In walked another girl, into the living room from Dina's room.

Holy shit. Is every girl at this place fucking gorgeous? I looked down at the floor to avoid staring. "Oh Ellie, this is my new roommate." Dina smiled big at Ellie introducing me. I looked up to meet her eyes. She looked me down and up coldly before scoffing and heading out of the dorm room. "I'm heading out to go get ready for the event, I'll meet you back here later." The door closing behind Ellie loud.

"Don't mind her, She's just got an attitude problem. Are you free tonight? I know you just got here but do you have any plans?" She started walking to her dorm room. "There's a sorority event going on tonight. You're more than welcome to come with us. It'll just be our little group of me, Ellie and Jesse." She paused before walking into her room. "Of course there's going to be a shit ton of other people there along with drugs and alcohol." She nodded her head to follow her into her room. "I'm open to going out with yall tonight, I just need to grab myself from my car so that i'm able to get ready. You gotta promise not to leave my side though." i said unsurely. The door to our dorm opening and closing. "Roomy, i promise ill stick by your side. Ooo that must be Jesse."

Right on cue a guy walked into Dinas room. "And he can definitely help us grab your stuff from your car, ain't that right Jesse?" Dina gave him a hug and a kiss. "What am I doing? and who are they?" Dina laughed a little at Jesse. "This is my new room mate. They're going to be coming out with us and Ellie tonight. And they also need help moving their suitcases inside. So come on." Dina grabbed Jesses hand and lead yall out the dorm. On the way to my car, she informed Jesse of my name. We all chatted a bit before reaching the car.

"Have you let Ellie know that their going to be with us tonight?" Jesse asked Dina as we grabbed my suitcases. Uh oh, is it going to be a problem that I'm there with them? She doesn't even know me. Dina sighed. "I'm sure it'll be fine. She'll be busy with dealing. Plus, my roomy is going to be hanging out with me. If Ellie has a problem, she can go deal with the stick up her ass on her own." We were on our way back to our dorm. "Did you say dealing?" I looked over at Dina feeling hopeful. God I could use a good high. "Yeah, Ellie goes to the parties mainly to sell joints. She sells out pretty fast. Occasionally she'll have acid or shrooms." Jesse spoke up making me look in his direction. "Could I just give you the money and you get me a joint? She didn't look to pleased towards me earlier." He nodded his head. We had reached Champion Hall and went to the elevator.

"Once we get inside the dorm, im going to head over to Ellies and we'll meet you guys back here to head to the sorority." Me and Dina agreed with Jesse and the rest of the elevator ride was silent. The doors opened and we made the right turn to head to our room. We made it to 420 and went inside. Going straight to my room to put my suitcases inside. "Thank yall so much for helping me move all my shit inside, along with inviting me out with yall tonight." Dina was already going in for a hug. "Of course! There's no need to thank us, you're apart of our group now whether you like it or not."

Her hugs are so nice and comforting. They remind me of Dylan's hugs. Oh my god I forgot to let them know I made it into town. Jesse patted my back. Dina released me from our hug, "Okay you head out and make sure Ellie's good to go and we'll get ready to go" She kissed Jesse and then practically shoved him out of our dorm door.

"If you need any help with decisions on what to wear, I'll be here in my room." Dinas voice slightly faded away as she went into her room. I just got here and she's already treating me as if we've been friends for years. I may have just gotten the best room mate anyone could ask for. I pulled my phone out and finally opened the text that Alex had sent in the group chat. I don't need to explain myself at the moment, and I don't need anyone here accidently stumbling upon it. I held down the message then deleted it. Okay now I should let them know I made it safe.

<3 Sluts <3

Me - hey guys, I made it to Seattle safe and just got my stuff up in my room finally! It's so beautiful here, I can't wait for yall to come down and visit :)

I sent the message and tossed my phone onto the bed. Hmm what should i wear tonight? I opened my suitcase and began pulling clothes out. It wouldn't hurt to put away some clothes while figuring out what to wear right? Grabbing shirts and putting the on hangers to set inside the closet I came across one of my loose, black, cropped t-shirt. Ah, perfect! I immediately put the shirt on. and finished hanging up the rest of my shirts. I opened up one of my other suitcase to start unpacking my pants. A few pairs in, I came across my grey cargo pants with white stitching. Oooo these, I'm wearing these ones tonight. I slide the pants on and observed myself in the mirror.

This outfit complements my body so well. I grabbed my black and white beaded necklace that had a little black mushroom charm on it from my bag and put it on around my neck. One last finishing touch. I grabbed my perfume and sprayed myself. mmm my favorite. Taking in a deep breathe to smell it. Vanilla and toasted marshmallow. "Okay, i actually need advice on my outfit, what do you think, how do we feel about it?" Dina came into my room at a fast pace and did some slow turns to show me her outfit. "I think the outfit is perfect and we should feel hot and confident." I smiled at Dina watching her relax. "Thank you roomy, I needed that." She checked herself out on last time in my mirror before heading back to her room.

"Jesse and Ellie should be here soon. We're going to ride in Jesse's car over to the sorority if you're okay with that." She spoke loud enough for me to hear her for the distance. "That works perfectly for me, I'm the one tagging along with yall." Shit I don't really have any say on what we do, you just invited me to hang out with yalls group today. "You have plenty of say, we could walk there if you chose to. You're not tagging along, you're apart of this group now."

The front door open and closed. "We're back!" Jesse announced as they walked into the living room. He walked into my room, "Here you go, free of charge." He smiled handing me a joint. I took it from his hand, the smell getting stronger. oh this smells so amazingly. "Well if it's free of charge, lets go smoke this together." I smiled at him and followed him out to the living room where Ellie and Dina were talking. "You guys ready to head out? We have a lovely joint to smoke on the way since someone offered to share." Jesse spoke and ushered us out the door.

We walked down to the elevator, Jesse and Dina in front talking about random shit going on in their life. Me and Ellie were behind them walking quietly. We made inside the elevator. Why does the energy around me feel so tense. Could it be her? I let my eyes wonder and look to the right of me to see Ellie. She looks like she's in deep thought. Jesse's and Dinas conversation still going on in the background. I felt my palms getting sweaty and my heart start to race. Okay, no, its me. I'm the tense energy. It's okay, I'm okay. The doors to the elevator opened and we made out way through the campus and to the parking lot where Jesse's car was parked.

"Alright climb on in." Dina opened the passenger door and scooted up the passenger seat so us to be able to get into the back seat. Ellie climbed in first and then I followed. It's a little cramped back here. Then Dina slid the seat back into place and go into the car. Okay now its really cramped back here. I felt heat on the side of my left knee. I glanced down and seen Ellies leg was up against mine due to the lack of space. As if she just realized it too, she tried to move her leg away from mine. Whenever her efforts failed, she sighed very annoyingly. Am I a problem for her?

Jesse started his car and turn some music on. Bring Me the Horizon started blasting through the car. Ah he's got a great taste in music, we're going to be great friends. "Aye roomy, you ready to spark up that joint?" She looked over the seat to be able to see what my response was since the music was too loud to just hear my reply. "Fuck yeah!" I pulled out my lighter and the joint and started to light up. Dina had turned around to face back to the front while saying something to Jesse.

I got the joint going and took a decent hit. I felt eyes on me and looked to my left to see Ellie already looking at me. We held the eye contact for what felt like forever. I wish i could understand what her thoughts are. I held the joint out for her to take, she reached out, our fingers slightly touching as she took the joint from me. Putting it to her lips, she inhaled the smoke. She looks so mesmerizing while smoking. She exhaled her smoke, breaking the eye contact and leaned forward to pass the joint off to Dina. "Here you go Dina."

I felt my phone vibrate in my pants pocket. I pulled it out to check. Oh Dylan replied!

<3 Sluts <3

About fucking time you let us know you made it! We miss you like crazy already! Be sure to get plenty of rest especially after that drive - Dylan

Me - I know, I know! and i miss you guys like crazy too! I'll get plenty of rest later! I got invited out by my room mate to go party at a sorority tonight!

You better keep us updated with that party! and if there's any cute girls! - Dylan

I giggle at Dylan's reply. Of course she wants to know if there's any pretty girls. "Here you go" I looked up and Jesse had the joint in his hand and was passing it back to me. ooo yess i forgot we were smoking. "pfft." I looked over to my left to see Ellie rolling her eyes. Was that towards me? I put the joint to my lips and took a hit. Breathing out, I felt my body relax more. I took in another hit before handing it off to Ellie.

I didn't bother looking in her direction this time. She can keep her cranky mood to herself. Like Dina said Ellie can do deal with the stick up her ass on her own. It wasn't long until we were pulling up to the sorority. "Yall ready to have fun tonight bitches!?" Dina yelled from the front seat.

I leaned up between to two front seat to see Jesse and Dina, "Fuck yeah I'm ready for this shit. You guys better stick by my side though." I laughed nervously. Jesse found us a parking spot a good block down the street. "Don't worry, you'll have one of us at your side at all times." Dina got out of her seat and slide it up for us to get out. As I'm getting out first, I hear yet another annoyed sound coming from behind me in the back seat. Okay you're seriously about to give me an attitude that no one is going to want to deal with. "You know, I've been hearing alot of sound attitude coming from someone whose name won't be mentioned." Jesses sarcastically said while slowly looking in Ellies direction as she got out of the car after me. Finally someone said something. "Mind your fucking business Jesse." Ellie walked off at a fast pace to the party.

"Damn, someone definitely has a bad attitude tonight." Jesse laughed it off. "She's probably just upset about something over Kat. I had seen on snapchat that she was going to be here too. Maybe Ellie seen it." Dina chimed in as we made our way to the party. Who's Kat?

Chapter Text

The house was vibrating from how loud the music is. Dina grabbed my hand as her and Jesse led me through the crowd. There's so many people, I don't understand how they know where they're going. I think we just walked through the living room of the sorority, or maybe it was the dining room. Fuck this house is huge.

"What's your choice of poison?" Dina pulled me up closer to the counter inside of the kitchen. "Whatever poison is available!" I'm not sure she even heard me, I barley understood her. She nodded her head and began to pour us drinks. She handled me my cup and already began to down hers. "This is going to be a long night for me." Jesse laughed while watching Dina pour her 2nd drink and finish it. I can't let her go in on her own. I lifted my cup to my lips and began to drink it as fast as I could. "Fuck yeah, Here." Dina handed me another, "Let's see if you can hang Roomy." I grabbed the drink from her and gulped it down.

Dina held onto my hand and pulled me through the house into the room where the music was playing from. Bodies pushed against each other, dancing to the beat. There's hardly any space in here, I don't think - Being pulled from my thoughts, literally, Dina was yanking me through the crowd till she found a spot she found comfortable and started dancing.

Feeling the alcohol starting to settle in my body, I let loose and let the music take control. Whatever this song is, it's fucking amazing. I love this beat. I felt a body being more pushed against me. I look to my right and see this beautiful human looking at me. With my body now facing hers, she moves in closer. Following the beat our bodies move together.

She wrapped an arm around the back of my neck while I placed a hand on her hip. Swaying to the beat, she moved in closer to where there was no longer any space between. I looked over for Dina in the midst of the dancing and she was no where in sight. No fucking way. "You okay?" A soft voice spoke, I hardly heard it over the music. I made eye contact with the girl I'm dancing with to see concern written all over her face.

"Yeah I'm good, nothing to worry about. I was just lookin for my room mate that I came with." We slowly stopped dancing to the beat. "I can try to help you find them!" She grabbed my hand and pulled us through the crowd. Does everyone just have this house memorized.

"Do you have any guesses where we may find her?" I looked around the area we were in now to see if i could spot her. "Maybe in the kitchen?" It's the only other place in this house that Dina took me to. The girl began walking in the direction I assumed the kitchen was in, leading me through the bodies that crowded the hallway.

"ROOMMYY" A drunken yell was directed at me as soon as I stepped into the kitchen. "Take a shot with, No, come take multiple shots with me" alright, lets do this. I made my way over to Dina, who already had sets of shots set up. "You're gonna keep us safe right?" I looked over at Jesse. He chuckled, "Yes, I'm completely sober and am prepared to deal with this mess."

One by one we took the shots. I've lost count of what number we were at. Oh there's that pretty girl again. I made eye contact with the girl I had been dancing with earlier and walked through the crowd of people to get to her. Whenever I reached her, I had leaned in close enough for her to hear me over the music "Hey, I didn't catch your name earlier. I lost you after you helped my find room mate." I continued to tell her my name and thank her for helping me. "I'm Kat, it was no problem giving you a hand."

Kat. Why does that name sound familiar? Dina came pushing through the people to get to me. "Hey we're heading outside to smoke, you coming?" I looked back at Kat. "You go on ahead, I don't smoke." Dina looped her arm through my arm and led me outside.

We stumbled our way out the the patio where Jesse and Ellie were sitting and smoking. I felt like my heart stopped inside of my chest. She looks so good. Ellie was breathing in a hit from the joint while Dina pulled my down to sit on the bench across from them.

Biting my lip, I looked away from the incredible sight that is in front of me. "You looking for Kat again." Dina leaned in and began to tease me. Her words slurred from the alcohol she's had. "I seen you two getting all cozy while dancing." I felt my face began to heat up. Jesse now had the joint and was passing it to Dina. "Shut up, I was just looking around." I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms getting more comfortable on the bench, my body swaying ever so slightly.

"Oh shit, you were getting cozy with Kat?!" Jesse asked practically jumping out of his seat. Ellie scoffed and rolled her eyes pulling out her phone. "What, you upset that you broke things off?" Jesse looked at Ellie annoyed. She returned the expression. I feel like I just caused some tension here. Well Jesse is mainly causing it. So I'm not really the one here to blame. "Why the fuck would I be upset? It's not like she made the last few months of our relationship a living hell" Dina finally passed the joint to me while we watched Ellie and Jesse's stare down.

I don't feel like this is the place for this type of conversation. Ellie leaned back to stare up at the sky, and took a deep breathe in. holy fuck. "I haven't told you guys everything that happened. I understand why yall don't see how awful of a person Kat is." She groaned sitting back up normal. I leaned forward to pass off the joint to Ellie. Avoiding eye contact with me while she took the joint.

Dina was now leaning against me on the verge of passing out. My eyes were starting to get heavy. "Alright let's get you two back to your dorm." Jesse stood up and walked over to help Dina get up. "Hey Ellie can you help me out please" His voice was faint and things were blurry. I heard Ellie groan, followed by the sound of her getting up and walking over. "No, I got Dina. You help them back to the car." An annoyed sigh.

Warm hands grabbed my arm and put it over their shoulder, wrapping their arm around my waist. I felt myself being lifted to stand up. mmm what's that smell? fresh rain and some earthy tone to it. I opened my eyes slightly to find myself pressed against Ellies side and being walked away from the party. So that's way the music was getting quieter.

"Thanks for helping me out El, I don't think i could've gotten these two out on my own." Jesse sounded out of breathe. Dina made a muttering sound that wasn't comprehendible. "Shut the fuck up." Ellie spoke softly though sounding pissed off by the tone. I felt her body vibrate against mine when she talked. I'm so sleepy, are we almost to the car yet? I let my head lean onto Ellie shoulder was we walked. "Ugh" She moved her shoulder to try to nudge my head off. I let my head drop, looking down. So maybe I am her problem.

We made it to Jesse's car after what felt like forever. Jesse helped Dina into the backseat first and then me. Dina was laying up against the window of the car and i laid my head on her shoulder. A nap sounds so good right now. Jesse and Ellie climbed into the front seat and Jesse began to drive us home. Yeah imma take a nap. I let my eyes close and started to drift off to sleep.

"Hey... You know you can talk to me, right?" There was a pause. "You haven't seemed like yourself lately and Me and Dina are worried about you. Ever since Ka-" Jesse was interrupted by Ellie. "Don't bring her into this. Yeah, she was a problem for me but she's not the entire thing." Ellies tone was harsh. "Well if it's not all her, then what is it?" His voice was laced with concern. Why am I not falling asleep? I shouldn't be listening to this. It's none of my business.

Ellie sighed, "I don't know what is it. I just feel angry at the world." She sounds so empty. "Okay, okay, this is a start." Jesse encouraged her to keep talking, assuring her that me and Dina were asleep in the backseat. okay now i feel guilty. go to sleep, go to sleep. "I can't describe why i feel angry." She took a deep breathe and let it out. "I'm afraid.. I'm going to end up alone.." She spoke very quietly. aw my heart. "and there's nothing that I can do about it." man this hits hard to home.

"Why did you end things with Kat if you're afraid of ending up alone? You guys were happy, she couldn't have made things that awful, right?" Jesse asked her hesitantly. "It wasn't going to work out for us." Ellie tried to shut down the conversation. "How do you even know that. Things could've changed to back how they were." He questioned her. "I felt it." The conversation went quiet for a little bit. Dina's breathing next me to was all I could hear.

Jesse let out a sigh, "well thank you for opening up to me. It's good for you to let those feelings out" Jesse reached over while driving and gave Ellie a nudge with his fist. "I love you fucker and I care about you." He continued to drive us home. "Yeah yeah, I love you too." that was such a wholesome moment. I felt the car come to a stop and listened to Jesse put it in park. The doors opened and the cold air pushed itself into the car.

"Noooooo." Dina began to groan and curl up in a ball. "Come on buddy." Jesse grabbed my arms and pulled me out of the car and helped me with my balance before handing me off to Ellie. Wrapping her arm around my waist and throwing my own over her shoulders, she began walking us to the dorm. Jesse pulled Dina out of his car and locked it before following behind us.

I felt the world around me start to spin, and I pushed myself from Ellies grasp and onto the grass next to us. Throwing up all the contents that were in my stomach. I heard feet shuffling behind me and it wasn't long until Dina was right there by my side doing the same. "Better for them to get it out now huh?" Jesse laughed a little at us. I couldn't hear the rest of the conversation due to me and Dina letting everything out.

Once we were finished, we were helped back to our feet and kept walking to our dorm. "Oof, you do not smell lovely right now hun." Jesse chuckled leaning his head away from Dina. Oh god i probably smell awful too. I tried my best to lean away from Ellie.

We made it to the dorm and got onto the elevator. Letting go of Ellie I let myself lean against the elevator wall watching Dina cuddle into Jesse's side as he's helping her stay standing up. Must be nice. Looking away from them, I find myself meeting Ellies eyes in the reflection of the Elevator. Fuck. My focus shifted down towards my shoes. wait, why am i acting this way? I look up slowly back at the reflection. She's still looking at me. My eyes wander from the reflection towards her. It could just be the alcohol in my system that I'm feeling but she's so pretty to look at. I watch her eyes move from my reflection to look at me directly.

It feels like my breathe is caught in my throat. Her eyes are so entrancing. They're the prettiest shade of green that I've seen. How have I not noticed yet that she has freckles? Ellie turned her head away from me making a scoffing noise. Aaand she's back to being annoyed. The elevators door opened and Jesse started leading Dina out. Ellie rolled her eyes walking over to help me. Maybe I shouldn't have drank tonight, I've nothing but a problem since. She wrapped her arm around me and began walking, not giving me time to adjust and walk with her. By the time Ellie and I made it to the dorm, the door was standing wide open.

Jesse walked out of Dina's room and we were walking in. "I got Dina into bed all nice and comfy." He came over and helped Ellie walk me into my room and laying me on the bed. "Think you can help them change and get into bed?" Jesse asked as he walked out of the room. "I can't since I'm with Dina and all." His voice fading off. "Motherfucker, I guess I don't have a a fucking choice now, do I?" She muttered to herself letting out a big sigh.

I did my best to sit up and try to help undress myself. I feel so heavy and out of it. She walked over to my closet and took out a big Tshirt before coming back over to where I was. I lifted up arms up to take my shirt off and felt my crop top being pulled over my head and tossed it onto the floor. Ellie kept muttering to herself as she helped my put the big t-shirt on. I started to unbutton my pants and shaking them down off my legs. Why do I feel like such shit? I looked at Ellie as she helped me get under my covers on my bed, a tense energy radiating off of her. It seems it's gotten worse with her being around me.

My words drunkenly slurred out, "Do you hate me.?" Ellie froze, the color draining from her face. I wiggled around under the covers to get more comfy. "W-what.. what did you say..?" Ellie stumbled over her words. No response.

Chapter Text

Ellies POV

Whatever Dina needs it better be important, calling me and telling me to rush over. I knock of the door of her dorm, the door swung open almost immediately. "Thank god you're here." She grabbed me by my shirt and yanked my inside, closing the door behind me. "I got a call that my room mate was in the front office and is currently having a tour and heading this way! How's the place look?" She frantically was moving around the dorm tidying everything up. Looking around, everything looked nice and clean. "You're good Dina, the place looks spotless." Still Dina hurried off to her room, "I just want whoever is moving in to feel comfortable and nothing does that other than a clean space." I followed behind her. Is this seriously the reason she made me rush over? For my opinion on how the place looks.

"I hope you realize, this space is clean almost 100 percent of the time." I sighed looking around. "I've never seen this place dirty actually." Dina let out a stressed sigh. "I know, I know, I just- ugh.. I can't help but worry." I reached over and patted her on the shoulder. "No need to worry, you're a likeable person. you and your room mate will get along just fine." I tried to reassure her. "You know.. speaking of getting along.. you never told me what happened between you and Kat since you used to get along so well with each other." Dina moved to her bed and propped her head on her hands.

Of fucking course. "And I could use a story to distract me from the stress." She smiled at me innocently. Just my fucking day. "uuuh, I don't know if now's the time, your room mate could be here at anytime.." I looked around Dinas room avoiding eye contact. "You seriously need to get this off your chest though, you haven't spoken to anyone about it. Me an-" I interrupted her sentence, "There's nothing to fucking speak about." I took a deep breathe and let it out "Yes things were great between Kat and I. I didn't feel like it was going to work out with us." Moving backwards to sit in one of the fluffy chairs Dina had in her room, putting my head in my hands.

I don't know how to even describe what happened. I looked at Dina finally. "I can't even tell you what caused things to shift between us because I don't know shit. All I noticed was how she started being distant, treating me differently. Most of our conversation she had an anger or annoyed tone towards me." Dinas face dropped a bit into a sad expression. "She just started acting that way towards you suddenly?" Sounding confused, Dina shook her head. "I don't understand. She was head over heals for you." I'm just as lost as you are. "That's what I fucking thought too. Though it got to the point where I didn't see a point of us being together if that's how she wanted to treat me. She couldn't even give me a damn explanation on why she was acting that way anytime I asked." There's also no point of me staying with her, her first words to me aren't the ones that's scarred onto me.

"Eh, that's her loss." Dina smiled at me. I laughed at bit, "yeah, I'm a fucking prize man." I smiled big, doing a cheesy pose. Dina laughed harder. "Imma head to the bathroom real quick, I'll be right back." With that, she got up and left the room. I pulled out my phone to distract myself while i wait for her to get back. I opened snapchat and began clicking on stories, not really paying much attention to them. wait a minute. I click back on one of the stories. no. fucking. way. There on my screen was a picture of Kat. Not just any picture though. It was an old picture, a shared memory from 3 months ago. She was in one of my shirts, straddling the lap of some dude, making out with him. We've been broken up for 2 months.

"I feel so much better, I felt like i was going to pee my-" Dina froze, looking at me whenever she came into the room. "Woah, you okay there buddy? You look like.. you're about to commit a murder." I might, I just fucking might. I passed my phone up to Dina to look at. "What The Fuck. Didn't you break up like a month or 2 ago?" I was trying to take deep breathes and keep calm. She seriously had the audacity to treat me like shit, and cheat on me. "Can I even be upset, we're not together anymore." I sighed angrily.

"Fuck her." Dina handed my phone back to me. She closed her door, leaving it crack, and jumped onto her bed. "We're going to go out tonight to that sorority party and we're going to get fucked up!" She began to get hyped up. "yeah, okay." I felt my leg start to shake and bounce. Fuck Kat. Letting out another sigh. What type of shit did I do to deserve this?

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .*Flashback* . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Kats POV

Laying in bed with Ellie has become the most peaceful thing for me. I look over to my side to see her already looking at me. I leaned in and kissed her. Grabbing her shirt and pulling her closer to me, the kiss becoming more heated. I gently began to tug up on her shirt trying to move it up her body. "..Kat.." Ellie spoke breaking the kiss, and softly grabbing my hands to remove them from her shirt. "We've talked about this.." Here we go again. I rolled my eyes. "You never let allow us to go anything further, even kissing is too much for you at times" I huffed at annoyed. "I'm your girlfriend! We've be together for 6 months, and only little kisses have happened between us. You don't let it get anymore intense than that." My eyes began to tear up.

"Do you even find me attractive?" I asked out quietly. Ellie has already wrapped her arms around my body and pulled me in close. "Of course I d-" Before she could finish her sentence, I cut her off. "Then why haven't we done anything? What's kept you from wanting to do anything with me?" Ellie let out a sigh, looking defeated. "It's me.. It's my body... I don't know how else to put it.. I'm not ready for that type of.. intimacy.." She looked like she was trying to find the right words. Why don't i believe her? Her body language tells me something else.. "There's nothing else?" I looked her in the eyes, seeing her stare back into mine. "No."

*ding* My phone chimed and I looked down to see a text notification. Looking up at Ellie, "Its probably the group chat texting about going out tonight. Let's go out and have a good time tonight." I sighed as I got up off the bed. "You can go ahead and hop into the shower, I need to run to my room real quick and grab some things before I get ready. Before Ellie has the chance to reply, I gave her a quick kiss and started to head out the door. "Ill be back soon."

Luckily we lived in the same building, Champion hall. I live down on the 2nd floor while Ellie lives on the 10th. I hurried my way to the Elevator and pushed the button to my floor. I opened my messages to see it was the group chat, letting us know what restaurant they wanted to meet at. I replied telling them that Ellie and I were getting ready and we'd see them soon. The doors opened and I rushed over to my room. Getting inside, I grabbed an outfit for tonight and some of my make up. I got everything I came for and headed back up to Ellies.

Getting back inside of Ellies room, I set my things down in her living room. Thank god she doesn't have a room mate. Seeing her door cracked open as I left it, I went towards it. Through the crack of the door, I seen Ellie. She was drying herself off, back towards me, looking into the mirror. okay, this is not creepy of me, she my girlfriend, and plus I can't even see anything. I began to back up when something caught my eye. Is that a faint word? She turned more to dry the other side of her. I backed up completely away from her door. Was that a word I just seen on her lower hip. I rub my eyes and backed up even more, stumbling into her couch, making a loud noise.

"Kat? Is that you?" I grabbed my shoes and dropped them onto the floor. "Yeah, I just got back." Okay, act natural. "Am I good to hop in the shower now?" I felt the tears fighting their way up to my eyes. I made my way over to the open bathroom door. "Yeah you'r-" I closed the door behind me before she finished her sentence. My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest. Deep breathes. I felt my chest rise, and and tremble a bit as I let the air out. That couldn't have been a word on her. That'd mean that.. no... she wouldn't.. no one would do that... but the chances.. I reached and turned the water on for the shower.

No one in their right mind would string another human along knowing that they have soulmate.. maybe I was just seeing shit... wait.. if she knows she has a soulmate... then that would explain why she doesn't want to do anything with me.. I let the water run over my body and wet my hair. Grabbing the shampoo, I started to scrub my scalp. The probability for soulmates are insanely low though.. she's gotta be aware of that.. maybe she knows she'll never meet them.. I rinsed the soap from my hair. But could she really be with someone, who she knows isn't her soulmate? I felt my breathe hitch, Ellie was seriously going to date me, knowing I wasn't made to be with her, and she's hidden that from me? Anger started to boil in my chest. Did she not consider how I would feel if I found out?

Alright, lets see how long she can really last with me. I washed my body and face then got out of the shower to dry off. I won't let her find out that I know, I'm just going to make this relationship hell now. I know now we aren't made for each other. You think you can just get away with playing with my heart?

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .* End of Flashback* . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Ellies POV

The sound of the dorm door being unlocked and opened caught both mine and Dina's attention. She has stopped jumping on her bed and listened intently. did we hear the door being used? The sound of soft foot steps came from the living room. Dina looked over at me mouthing "Oh My God." Her eyes popping out of her head. "They're here!" she whisper shouted at me.

I rolled my eyes. I need a hit. Trying to get off the bed, she caught her foot in her blank causing her to trip and fall. She reached for the corner of her dresser to catch herself, but she just pulled the books off that where on top of it. Dina quickly scrambled up off the floor. "I'm going to go say hi now." then happily ran out the room.

I should head back to my dorm to get ready. I'll let Dina know on the way out. "Oof" She did not.. "Oh my God I'm so sorry, I was coming to say hi, but you turned around before I got the words out. I didn't mean to knock you onto your ass. It probably didn't help that I was also running."

She did. I stood up out of the chair. Good job buddy. "I'm your room mate Dina." Listening to Dina talk to her new dorm mate, I walked out of her room and into the living room. The room mates eyes looked to the floor immediately. Shy... That's cute.. No. Not cute. I'm not dealing with another Kat. "Oh Ellie, This is my new room mate." Dina smiled big at me.

I looked at them coldly, feeling my eyes observe them down and up. Too bad that they're really pretty. Ugh fuck these thoughts. I scoffed and kept heading for the door. "I'm heading out to go get ready for the event, I'll meet you back her later." Slamming the door behind me. I walked over to the Elevator and clicked on the button to head up to the 10th floor. The doors to the elevator opened and I made my way over to room 569. I unlock my door and went straight to my room. I pulled out one of my bongs from my nightstand and packed a bowl. Lighting up the whole thing, I inhaled my hit. Just what I needed, now time for a shower.

I left my room and walked over to the bathroom, closing the door behind me. Looking in the mirror, I began to remove the clothing on my body. My eyes flicking down to my hip area. Do you hate me. Chills traveled down my spine, My heart dropped to my stomach. This still happens every time I see it. Letting out a breathe I didn't realize I was holding, I turned on the water and stepped into the shower. I proceeded to wash my hair, body, and face trying to take a quick shower. finishing up I stepped out and dried myself off.

I walked back over to my bedroom to start getting dressed. I threw on a pair of black boxers and sports bra. I grabbed a pair of jeans and my grey hoodie. No need to dress to impress. I grabbed a pair of socks and went back into the living room to put on my shoes when there was a knock at my dorm door. I went over and opened it, "You about ready Williams?" Jesse asked stepping into my dorm. "Yeah, I'm just finishing up." Sliding my shoes on and tying them. Oh I need to grab the pre-rolls I did to sell tonight. "Have any plans for when you get to the party?" Jesse asked me looking around my dorm.

"Just the usual. Sell the drugs people want." I laughed a little, standing up to walk over to my stash. "Mainly joints tonight thought." I pulled out a baggie that was fill with the pre-rolls. This shit will go by so fast, I'm guessing within the first hour. "Speaking of those, Dinas room mate wants to buy one off of you." deadass? okay, okay. That adds to their attractiveness. "I don't remember your prices so i haven't given them an amount yet." He shrugged his shoulders. I opened the baggie, grabbed a joint, and handed it to Jesse. "It's on the house." Not because they're pretty or anything, it's the least I can do since I was a bit of an ass to them earlier.

"Are you feeling well?" Jesses hand reached out to touch my forehead while chuckling. I smacked his hand away from me. "Man fuck off." annoyingly rolling my eyes at me. "I'm just trying to be fucking nice." Jesse gasped loudly. "What have you done with Ellie?!" He jokingly yelled, backing away from me. This fucking idiot. "I'm leaving." I shook my head and walked out of my dorm. "Right behind you." Jessed called out to me and closed my dorm door behind him.

We walked to the Elevator and went down 2 floors. The doors open and we turned right to walk down the hall to room 420. Jesse opened the door to the dorm, "We're back!" I followed in behind him into the living room, watching Jesse make his way to Dina's room mate room.

"Did I just hear Jesse say free of charge?" Dina was at my side looking at me with a sly smile. I rolled my eyes. Don't be getting any ideas, I'm done with dating. I'm allowed to be nice and give away a joint to your new room mate. It means nothing. "Yeah, thought it'd be a nice welcoming gift since they moved. Maybe they'll buy from me regularly now." I shrugged my shoulders. "Whatever you say Ellie." Dina laughed bit, looking over and seeing Jesse and the room mate walking into the living room.

"You guys ready to head out? We have a lovely joint to smoke on the way since someone offered to share." Jesse started ushering us out the door of the dorm. We started walking down the hall to the elevator. Jesse and Dina are in front talking about some random shit they have going on, while I'm stuck walking behind them with this person.

Glancing over at the room mate, I felt my heart skip a beat. You're going to share the joint you got with us, another plus. They look so good. I snapped my eyes away from them. Shut the fuck up. I'm not doing any dumb shit that has to do with feelings. We stepped inside of the Elevator and waited to get to the bottom level. Why am I so afraid of my feelings? I treated Kat amazingly. There was almost no fights until that last 2 months. What caused the switch? What did I do? Was it just her? I stood there staring at the ceiling trying to remember.

The doors of the elevator opened up and I followed everyone out. We walked through the campus and out to the parking lot. I caught myself occasionally looking over at Dina's room mate. This is going to be a hard night. I took a deep breathe. Maybe I could find someone at the party to distract. "Alright climb on in." I watched Dina scoot the passenger seat up for us to be able to get into the back seat.

I crawled my way through the small space and into the seat behind the driver. Fuck, I forgot tight of a space it is back here. Then in came the room mate. Holy fuck they're close. Feeling their body heat radiate off of them, I looked down. Our legs were pressed up against each other due to the lack of space. Okay, no problem. I can move over a little bit and create some space between us. I began to scoot over to the left, which wasn't much at all. I tried picking up my leg and crossing it over my other. That didn't help me either. This is fucking stupid. The last thing that I wanted was to be stuck against this stupid person.

I glanced over to my right, this beautiful stupid person. I looked away from them. What if they hurt you like Kat? Music began to blast through the speakers of the car. "Aye roomy, you ready to spark up that joint?" Dina leaned back to peek over the seat. "Fuck yeah!"

I looked over to my right, watching them pull out a lighter. They put the joint between their lips and started to light the joint. My heart began to race. My eyes flickering back and forth from their eyes to their lips as they took in their first hit of the joint. I swear I felt my jaw drop slightly. God fucking damn. The room mate looked over in my direction and we made eye contact. I'm busted. They're not looking away from me though. I felt myself being pulled in by their eyes. I can look at them forever.

They held out their hand to pass the joint off to me. Are they feeling this connection? Should I even try to flirt with them? Fuck, is this shit even worth it? I don't think I'll meet my soulmate with the shitty probabilities I was given. But I deserve a happy ending. I reached out to take the joint from them, our fingers slightly touching. A chill ran up my arm and through out my body. They're so enticing. I held the eye contact as I inhaled a hit from the joint. They sat there watching in awe. Fuck they aren't making this easy. Breaking the eye contact, I leaned forward to pass the joint off, " Here you go Dina."

I sat back in my seat and pulled my phone out. I need a fucking distraction. I open snapchat and began to click through the stories. Hm looks like alot of my regulars are out at the sorority tonight. A text appeared at the top of the screen.

-You coming to the party tonight to find someone else to string along?

Not this type of fucking distraction. I deleted the text. Someone else to string along? Is that how she feels about everything that happened. I closed my phone. "Pfft." She can go fuck herself, I'm not going to feed into her bullshit. I felt my eyes roll at the thought of her thinking she can come and try to talk shit to me. In my peripheral vision, I see the joint being passed to me. The room mate was avoiding any contact with me now.

I took the joint and inhaled a large hit, trying to fry myself into not caring. Fuck everyone. "Yall ready to have fun tonight bitches?!" Dina yelled from the front seat. We're in the car with you, there's no need fucking yell. The room mate shot forward, leaning in-between the front seats. This isn't a bad view.. "Fuck yeah I'm ready for this shit. You guys better stick by my side though."

Jesse found some parking a good block away from the sorority house. "Don't worry, you'll have one of us at your side at all times." Dina got out of her seat and scooted it forward for us to get out. First went the room mate, Their ass was practically in my face. Okay, I can not let them know I enjoyed this. I let out a groan loud enough for the group to hear. That's enough for it.

"You know, I've been hearing a lot of sound attitude coming from someone whose name won't be mentioned." What else was I suppose to expect that smartass say? Getting out of the car and standing up, "Mind your fucking business Jesse." I left the group walking off to the party.

Alright, time to attract the stoners. Trying to make my way through the house, I squeezed through the crowd of bodies that seemed to fill every hall and room. Mother fucker. I finally made it to the patio in the back yard. Pulling out a joint from the baggie, and a lighter from my pocket. With the joint between my lips, I lit the end of it up. Any minute now, I swear stoners have the nose of a bloodhound when it comes to this shit. I inhale the smoke into my lungs.

"Elllliiee! Just the person I was looking for." Exhaling, I look over in the direction I heard the voice come from. Talk about timing. "What's up Evan?" I take another hit from my joint. "How much for one of those?" They guy asks pointing to what's in between my fingers. "$5 each." His eyes practically popped out of his head.

"Fucking bet, Lemme get 2." He pulled out his wallet and grabbed a $10. Making the exchange, He walked off back into the house immediately getting stopped by someone. I continue to keep taking hits and sat down onto one of the benches. One by one people and groups came out asking to buy till I had completely sold all 50 of the joints I had rolled. For as long as that shit took me, these bitches went by so fast.

Jesse came walking out of the house and sat beside me on the bench. "Holy fuck it's hot in there. That place is too crowded for me." He let out a deep breathe. "Reason why I never stay in the house, can't get hot if I'm outside in the cool air." I looked up at the stars in the sky. "Hey, you got any more joints on you?" Feeling the smirk from on my lips. "Fuck yeah I do." I always roll more than one personal joint to keep on me.

"You're lucky I was saving it for the end of this." I pulled it out of the pocket along with the lighter, "Here, you get first hit." Jesse smiled, taking the joint from me and got it going. No way.. From the corner of my eye, I see Dina and her room mate stumbling over out of the house. Jesse held the joint out passing it to me. How much have they drink? I put the joint to my lips and inhaled. I closed my eyes feeling the high creep throughout my body as I exhale the smoke.

Dina pulled her room mate down onto the bench across from Jesse and I as I took another hit. "You looking for Kat again?" Feeling my stomach drop, I snap my head in Dina's direction to see that she's looking at her room mate. Fucking what? slurring her ways heavily, "I seen you two getting all cozy while dancing." I felt my eyes move over from Dina to her room mate. Fuck i need to learn their name.

A blush slowly covered across their face. "Shut up, I was just looking around." No fucking way.. My heartbeat began picking up pace. Her room mate had rolled their eyes and crossed their arms with a slight attitude causing their body to sway. fucking drunk cute ass mother fucker. I meant slapped myself. shut the fuck up ellie.

"Oh shit, you were getting cozy with Kat." Jesses practically jumped up off the bench. It felt like my blood was beginning to boil at the thought of Kat getting close with them. Chill the fuck out, you don't even know them. Letting out a scoff and rolling my eyes, I pulled out my phone. Fuck this conversation.

"What, you upset that you broke things off?" Jesse pulled me out of my thoughts, looking over at me annoyed. this fucking. Feeling the same expression grow onto my face. "Why the fuck would I be upset? It's not like she made the last few months of our relationship a living hell." Breathe Ellie, take deep breathes. Leaning to look at the stars again. They bring me so much peace.

I took in a breathe, "I haven't told you guys everything that happened. I understand why yall don't see how awful of a person Kat is." Sitting back up fully and letting out a groan I didn't realize I was holding. The joint being held out for me to take from the room mate. Fuck I forgot they were here. Avoiding any eye contact, I take the joint and finish it.

"Alright, lets get you two back to your dorm." Jesse had stoop over and made his way over to Dina. "Hey Ellie, can you help me out please." I stoop up groaning and walked over to him. No, I don't want to do this shit. "No, I got Dina. You help get them back to the car." Of fucking course. Sighing loudly, I crouch down to wrap my around around their body. Throwing their arm over my shoulder, I stood up, pulling them up to their feet. A sweet smell hitting my nose immediately. what is that..

We started walking around the house to use the side gate. It smells like.. dessert? The music of the party began to fade. At least they're pretty easy to help, still don't wanna be doing the shit. "Thanks for helping me out El. I don't think I could've gotten these two out on my own." Jesse spoke to me sounding out of breathe, followed my Dina muttering a few incoherent words. "Shut the fuck up." I let out lowly, though loud enough for him to hear.

The weight of a head now on my shoulder. I glance over to see Dinas room mate leaning onto me more. The sweet dessert smell now stronger. Oh, it's them. okay, maybe I don't mind helping them out. A tingle ran from my heart through out my body. No. Fuck, I'm not going to crush over anyone else. Where the fuck is Jesses car? I need to get the fuck away from them. I shook my shoulder a bit to move her head off. Sorry, but I'm not catching feelings again.

Finally making it back to Jesse car, I stood there holding up Dina's room mate. Jesse helped Dina into the backseat, then the room mate. Both of them looking passed out, Dina against the car window and her room mate leaning on her shoulder. I'm ready to be home. Jesse and I climbed into the car and Jesse started to drive us home.

"Hey.. you know you can talk to me, right? he paused. Ugh I just want a quiet ride home "You haven't seems like yourself lately and Me and Dina are worried about you. Ever since Ka-"

"Don't bring her into this. Yeah, she was a problem for me but she's not the entire thing." My tone coming off harsher than I meant to. It's so much more than her. "Well if it's not her, then what is it?" His voice coming off concerned. It's the fact her first words aren't on my body. It's me not being able to love anyone fully. It's knowing I'm going to end up alone.

I let out a sigh, "I don't know what it is. I just feel angry at the world." A numb feeling starts to wash over me. Jesse seemed to notice my mood drop. "Okay, okay. this is a start." He had encouraged me to keep talking, assuring me that Dina and her room mate were passed out in the backseat. "I'm can't describe why I feel angry." Like I have a soulmate, that I have a one in a billion chance of meeting.

I took in a deep breathe and let it out. "I'm afraid.. I'm going to end up alone.." my words coming out barley above a whisper. "and there's nothing that I can do about it." I turned my head to look out the window.

"How do you even know that. Things could've changed to back how they were." Jesse tried to push more for this conversation. "I felt it." I don't want to talk anymore. It's not even about feelings anymore. Kat wasn't the one for me. Things fell quiet between us for what felt like a few minutes.

Jesse let out a sigh, "Well thank you for opening up to me. It's good for you to let those feelings out." It didn't feel good. He reached over while driving and gave me a nudge with his fist. "I love you fucker and I care about you." aww biitch. Jesse pulled into the parking lot near our dorm. He put the car into park, and we opened the doors to get out. "Noooooo" Dina began groaning from the backseat as the cold air seeped into the car. Jesse reached into the back seat to pull out Dina's room mate. "Come one buddy."

Once he helped her get her balance, she was handed off to me. Just gotta deal with this shit a little bit longer. I threw her arm over my shoulder and wrapped my arm around their waist. The feeling in my hand on hip started to become too much to feel. They're so warm. Jesse had finally pulled Dina out of the car and locked the doors. I felt my hand move on her skin move slightly as we started walking to Champion Hall. My breathe hitched for a second. I was just fine moving them from the party, why am I now effected by even lightly touching them.

They pushed themselves away from me and began throwing up onto the grass that was next us. thanks for pushing yourself away. Then followed Dina. "Better for them to get it out now huh?" Jesse had walked over to my side laughing at them. I laughed a bit, "I'm just glad we're not wearing that throw up" Jesse started to laugh even harder. "Ugh that would've been awful for us."

They stopped throwing up after a while so we helped them up and keep walking to the dorms. "Oof, you do not smell lovely right now." Jesses chuckled leaning his head away from Dina. Well she did just finish vomiting up her guts. Her room mate shifted in the grip and was now leaning away from me. Aww they think they smell bad too. I laughed lightly to myself. I don't know if I'll be able to keep myself from crushing on them anytime longer.

We made it back to the dorm and got onto the elevator. Dina's room mate had let go of me and started to lean on to the wall, I let my arm slide out from around their waist. I watched their eyes, seeing them watch Jesse and Dina cuddle up to each other. My eyes shifted from theirs to their reflection on the elevator. Their eyes looked over to mine in the reflection. Holy fuck. Their eyes moved away from mine, looking down at their shoes. Good going Ellie, you fucking creep. Slowly their eyes moved their shoes and back to mine in the reflection. Breathe, fucking breathe idiot.

M heart was starting to pick up speed, racing inside of my chest. I let myself move from her reflection to looking right at her. We stood there observing each others facial features for what felt like eternity. How the fuck do they do this to me? Why am I letting this take control of me? Fucking knock this shit off Ellie. I turned my head away from them, letting out a scoff. I'm not ready to feel this way about someone.

The doors of the Elevator opened and Jesse started leading Dina out into the hall. Fuck i still have to help them. Rolling my eyes, i wrapped my arm around their waist and helped them off the elevator. They stumbled a bit beside me since I didn't give them a chance to adjust and walk with them. Real smooth, really fucking smooth. We finally made it to the room 420 and the door was standing wide open.

I practically dragged Dina's room mate into the living room, Jesse walking out of Dina's room. "I got Dina into bed all nice and comfy." He walked over and helped me get the room mate to their bed room, laying them on the bed. "Think you can help them change and get into bed?" Jesse asked as her walked out of the bedroom. "I can't since I'm with Dina and all." His voice fading off.

"Mother fucker, I guess I don't have a fucking choice now, do I?" I mutter to myself, letting out a sigh afterwards. Before I could help, the room mate had started to sit them selves up and try to undress themselves. I shouldn't be watching them struggle. I turned around and made my way over to their closet, taking out a big t-shirt. I walked back other to the bed and helped them pull off the crop top that was stuck around their head. Look everywhere but at them, okay I can do this. " I have to fucking do this. They obviously can't do the shit themselves." I spoke to myself lowly. I pulled the t-shirt over their head.

The room mate reached down and began unbuttoning their pants. It felt like my jaw hit the floor. Fuck they look so good. I nearly broke my neck, turning my head away from them. Have some fucking decency. Hearing the pants hit the floor and them getting more into bed, I reached over to help them under the covers. I need to get the fuck out of this room.

Then they spoke to me. It was slurred but understandable, "Do you hate me.?" It felt like the air just got knocked out of me. My body went ice cold. It's so hard to breathe. As if my heart wasn't already racing, but now felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. I watched them wiggle under the covers to get more comfortable in bed. In that moment, time stopped for me. "W-what.. what did you say..?" I stumbled over my words. I heard them. They gave me no response. I watched their chest rise and fall as they slept. No Fucking Way.

Chapter Text

Readers POV

uuugghhh my head fucking huurrrttsss. I sit up in my bed. My bed? When did we get home last night? I threw the covers off my body. And who helped me out of my clothes? I looked down to see I was wearing a t-shirt and some boxers. oh my god i need to pee. Slowly making my way off the bed and out of my bedroom. Jesus fuck everything is killing me.

The smell of bacon smacked me in the face as I opened my door. My stomach growled starting to feel hungry. Walking over to the bathroom, I look towards the kitchen to see Jesse in there cooking. Did he stay the night? I close the bathroom door behind me and do my business. Aw that feels better. I wipe my self clean and flush the toilet. Fuck that was loud, uugghh my head. I wash my hands and head out into the living room.

"AAYYEE LOOK WHO'S AWAKE." Jesse yelled from the kitchen, as I buried my head into the couch pillows. Could you be any fucking louder? "How you feeling over there? I just made some coffee, you want a cup?" ooooo yes. I sit up off the couch and rub my temples. "Coffee sounds lovely, thank you". Standing up and walking over to the bar counter in the kitchen. He slides over a cup of coffee along with creamer and continues cooking. A pile of pancake already starting to stack up on the counter beside him.

He's making alot of food, mmm it smells so fucking good. My mouth began to water at the scent that was now invading the dorm. "You mind going to get Dina so we can eat, she was supposed to be in here after getting dressed." As if cued, Dina groggily walked out of her bedroom in a big long sleeve button up. "I am in here." She sounds exhausted. Jesse slid her over a cup of coffee as she sat down on at the bar counter beside me.

Lifting the drink to her lips, she let out a satisfied sound. "mmmm, perfect. Thanks so much babe." Dina give Jesse a warm smile and kept drinking the coffee. A lonely feeling sept into my body. If only I was lucky enough to be able to love who ever I wanted. The door of the dorm opened and closed. Instead the universe made my other half, and displayed it on my body. The sound of a barstool pulled me out of my head. Ellie was now sitting on at he corner of the counter next to me.

Ellie leaned forward to see Dina, "You look like shit." Dina lifted her head from drinking her coffee to look Ellie in the eyes. "Well you sure now how to make a girl feel pretty." A laugh came both from Ellie and Jesse. He sat the pancake down on the counter along with the bacon.

Dina started to rub her head, "can you guys not laugh so loud, I think my head will explode if you continue." I giggled and little and laid my head down on the counter. "mine too." That caused Jesse to laugh even harder. "Serves you both right, what did you expect drinking that much." I lifted my head to see Dina shaking her head, "sshhhh I don't wanna hear this."

Jesse handed out our plates and let us serve ourselves. I grabbed just 2 pancakes and 3 pieces of bacon. Its best I have a light breakfast so that I won't throw it all up. I want to enjoy this! I tried to take my time eating my food but I practically inhaled it." Looking around the table, I seen that everyone else about did the same. "Damn Jesse, you gotta cook this more often." Ellie had spoke up causing me to look over at her.

Her eyes looked into mine when she noticed me move and a blush crossed her face. I felt a smile form on my lips as I turned my head away from her, seeing that Dina and Jesse had be caught up in their own conversation.

"Hey.. um.. did you sleep okay last night.?" My voice came out softly, almost sounding confused as I turned my head back towards Ellie to see her eyes scanning my facial features. Her eyes widening slightly before blinking fast. Hmm weird.. She held this stare with me that I can't quite explain. this feels... really.. intense. My heart was picking up pace inside of my chest.

Ellie gave a slight head nod wearing an emotion on her face that I couldn't understand. She looks hurt and conflicted. I wonder what she's got going on in her head. Before I could speak another word, Ellie stood from her seat and carried her plate to the sink. Okay, I'll just go fuck myself then.

Jesse stood up and started to gather the rest of our plates. "Thank you for breakfast Jesse, and for cleaning up my mess." Dina and Ellie agreed and thanked him. I stood up from the bar counter and made my way to my room. Peaking my head out before fully walking in. "Do you guys have any plans going on today?" I watched them looked back and forth between each other and shake their heads and shrug.

"Would one of yall mind showing me a gaming store that's close to campus?" Dina tried to jump up off the couch but it more of looked like a very enthusiastic slow rise, "Me! We need roomie time!!" She looked down at Ellie and Jesse who were now sitting on the couch, "You two are staying here." Ellie turned on the Ps5 and passing Jessie a controller. "Don't have to tell us twice."

Dina now looking back at me "Anything you need to get done before we go? I just need to change clothes." She started to walk towards her bedroom. "Yeah, I was going to shower real quick." I completely went into my room and grabbed a towel before heading out of my room and into the bathroom.

I start to strip down out of my clothes. My reflection catching my attention in the mirror as i removed my boxers. This stupid fucking scar. My blood ran cold. You're the reason to why I'll never be happy. How come you get the say of who I can be with? Of who I'm supposed to be with.

I turn the water on in the shower and let it warm up. I looked down at the words that were scarred into my lower hip. I'm going to make you disappear some day. An idea crossing my mind. Why have I just thought of this. A smile formed on my lips. I reached for one of my shaving razors that were in the cabinet and broke it open. Holding the now single razor blade between my fingers.

I lowered the blade down to my scarred words. This will work, it has to work. I take a in a deep breathe, and let it out swiping the razor across the words. That's it? I look down to see a single streak right through the middle. Just a few more to go. I let myself do another cut, then, another, and another. I kept going till the words are replaced with cuts. A new scar. One that doesn't tell me who I'm supposed to be with.

Satisfied with myself, I throw away the razor and clean up any blood that dripped onto the floor. I step into the shower, letting the warm water run over my body. A stinging pain forms down on my hip as the water washes the blood away. Finally, a new beginning. The feeling of hope filled my heart.

I did my shower routine of washing every part of my body and rinsing off. Stepping out of the shower and drying myself with the towel. Once all the water was off of me, I wrapped myself up and walked out of the bathroom. The conversation in the living room coming to a halt. I looked over at them looking at me as I walked into my room. That was weird.

Walking into my bedroom I went over to my dresser and grabbed my face moisturizer. Hopefully this video game store will be close by and they have what I'm looking for. I rub the moisturizer into my face, moving on to grab the body lotion and massage into my arms and legs. This roomie time is going to be so amazing! Facing my closet mirror, I look at my naked body. If only I could feel more human in my own skin.

I slide open the closet door and grab the clothes I'm going to wear. Taking out a slim tank top, and a pair of sweat pants, I put them onto my body. There we go, nice and comfy. Going back over to my dresser, I grab my body spray and mist the front of my shirt.

I step out of my bed room to see now only Ellie sitting on the couch. "Do you know if Dina is getting ready still?" She looked up from her phone, her green eyes checking me up and down. Dear lord fucking help me. She nodded my head and pointed towards Dina's room. Ellie went back to looking down at her phone as if I wasn't there. You can't just look at me like that then go back to normal. "Thanks." I walked passed the couch and to Dinas room.

"Dina you about ready to go?" Her door was cracked open. Reaching my hand out, I tapped on the door. There was no response. "Dina?" I called out again. I look back at Ellie to see that she too is looking at me puzzled. "Imma just head down to the bottom level to wait, would you mind letting Dina know whenever she's ready?" Heading towards the front door. Dina walks out of her bedroom. "Wait, wait, I'm coming!" As she sped walked over to meet me by the front door.

A small laugh came from my lips, "I was just going down to wait for you." Dina smiled at me. "Well we can go down to the 1st floor together now. She pushed me out the door, calling out to Ellie, "Don't burn our place down!" Then closing the door before she got a reply. We started out walk down the hallway to the elevator.

Dina passed me her phone with an empty contact open. "Put your number into my phone so that we can't lose each other." Ah perfect! I smiled and took my phone out to trade her. We put our information into each others phones. Both putting ourselves under the name roomie.

Making to the elevator, the doors opened and we stepped on. "Here you go." Dina passed me my phone back as I passed hers back. The ride down to the bottom level was nice and peaceful. When is it too soon to ask her questions about her personal life? I glance over at her as the door open to the bottom level. She is my room mate, we're going to be in each others lives for a while.

"So.. do you play any video games?" Dina looked over at me confused. "Huh?" Okay, maybe not the right question to ask. "You're taking to show me a video game store, I was wondering if you play any..? " Now understanding, Dina nodded her head. "Oh yeah. I'm sorry, I was in own little world. Yeah, I play video games. Not like a lot, but I'll play with Jesse or Ellie whenever they ask. Actually, I only know where this store is because of Ellie." Oh really? I felt myself listening to Dina even more now. "Ellie is a huge gaming nerd compared to me and Jesse"

"She likes to kick my ass in this one fighting game." We were now walking through the campus to get to the parking lot. "Jesse gets so pissed off that he hasn't been able to beat her yet either." I felt a devious smile form on my face. "Sounds like I'm going to have to challenge her." Dina looked at me excitedly. "You have to crush her for us! I need to see her get beat in that game." We finally reached the parking lot.

Dina led the way to her car. She unlocked the doors for us and we climbed inside. As I sat in the car, I buckled myself up. "Hey, do you remember getting home last night?" Dina buckled herself up and sat with her hands on the wheel thinking. "I remember puking in the grass and then waking up to Jesse handing me water."

She looked over at me, "What do you remember?" she started the car and started to drive to the game store. I had butterflies, there was someone helping me walk. They smelled like the earth with a weed touch. "Hearing Jesse laugh at us while we threw up." I chuckled left my lips as I spoke. Dina now laughing a little.

"Anything else.?" She looked at me with a face that says, she could tell I was in too much in deep thought when she asked what I remembered. How the fuck does she read me so easily?! I felt myself fighting a smile as my face turn a shade of pink. "No." She nodded her head slowly, "Uh huh, yeah suuuree."

I threw my hands over my face. "I don't know how to even explain in." I shook my head, removing my hands from my face and looked at Dina. She laughed slightly, "I knew it." She glanced over smiling then back to focusing on driving. "Just say what's on your mind, you don't have to explain."

Is it that easy? I nodded my head and turned my head to look down at my hands. "There was a person helping me walk to the dorm.. and they made me feel all warm.. and fuzzy." a small nervous laugh coming out after I spoke. "I can't remember who it is." Only the smell that came off of them. Fucking weirdo, I know. Dina nodded her head listening, then a sly smile formed on her lips. "What?" I looked at her lost. "Why the are smiling like that?"

Turns out the gaming store that Dina took me to was a few blocks down from the campus. She pulled into the parking lot of the store. "There's only two people who are allowed openly into our dorm. And I'm positive Jesse helped me inside." She smiled as big before hopping out of the car. So that would mean... that.. Ellie.. was the person...? I hoped out of her car and met Dina already standing outside the passenger door. She held a happy smile. "I think it's cute she made you feel that way."

Was it because of her that I felt that way? The memory of looking over at Ellie in the back of Jesse's car popped into my mind. The feeling of my heart racing passes through my chest. Her eye contact with me as she smoke the joint.

"Hey!" Dina was now waving her hands in front of my face. "Jesus now that your back." She started laughed and grabbed my hand, dragging me towards the store. "Don't think that we're done talking about this, I'm going too bug you about it on the way home." Dina let go of my hand, opened the door and we stepped inside.

We walked through the Ps game section of the store. Looking at the game title, trying to find the one I was looking for. "What was the name again?" Dina asked as she was looking. "Resident Evil 4, the remastered version." She nodded her head and continued to search. Knowing my luck, it's probably not here.

After looking through the whole store, we decided to finally ask the person behind the counter. They didn't have the game in stock and they don't know if it will become available at their store. Yeah, just my fucking luck. Accepting defeat, Dina and I leave the store and head back to her car.

Dina was on her phone texting as her walked to her car. I'll probably just buy the game online whenever we get home, make it easier for me. We climbed into her and started to buckle up. Dina's phone kept going off due to the texts flooding her phone.

"So Ellie has the game in her dorm room and she's going to bring it down to our dorm for you to play." Dina looked at me smiling as she started the car. "And before you try to refuse, she already beat the game so it's just been sitting there." The butterflies returned to my stomach.

"Before I keep asking about Ellie, I wanna know about you and Kat last night." Memories dancing with Kat flooded my mind. Oh my god I forgot all about her. "What about me and Kat? We danced and then she helped me find you." I shrugged a little. "Does Kat make you feel all warm and fuzzy?" I shook my head. "I just think Kat is really pretty, I didn't feel anything when dancing with her." I don't think Kat was even into me in that way. Not like Ellie is though too.

Dina made glances from the road to me, "But you felt something from a person you couldn't remember and it turned out to be Ellie?" Stopping at a red light, Dina looked at me. "What do you think about Ellie?" The light turned green causing Dina to go back to focusing on driving. I think she is so fucking beautiful. She has an intimidating energy flowing off of her. "I don't really know Ellie yet." I shook my head a little and shrugged. "Okay let me rephrase it. Do you find Ellie really pretty?"

I felt my heart stop for a split second. My head slowly nodding, "Yeah.. I find her to be extremely beautiful." Dina practically squealed in the driver seat, "Oh my god!! I ca-" Before she could go into trying to be excited, I interrupted her. "But I don't think Ellie feels anything for me. She's harsh and distant with me. We haven't even had a conversation yet because she refuses to say a word to me."

Dina shook her head slightly, "Give her time and she'll come around and talk. She's been acting a bit different since her and Kat broke up. I barley got her to open up to me about it yesterday." So she's not even ready to be in a relationship with someone.

Dina pulled up to the campus parking lot and parked her car close to the Champion Hall dorm. We unbuckled ourselves and got out of her car, walking side by side through the campus. "Promise me you won't say anything to Ellie about any of this?" I looked over at Dina hopefully.

I don't need Ellie thinking I'm trying to get Dina to set us up, especially if the break up was not that long ago. "I promise not to say anything to her about this.. unless she says something to me about you like this." My jaw dropped. "Don't worry, I'll come tell you what she says." She smiled big and gave me a slight shove.

We reached Champion hall and went inside, heading straight for the elevator. The doors opened and we stepped inside. "At least you'll have a video game to play whenever we get back to the dorm." Dina spoke to me with a smile. "Aw fuck yeah! I completely forgot about that." Dina checked her phone, "Ellie said the game's on the coffee table in the living room." I smiled and nodded my head. "Can you tell her Thank you for me?" The doors of the elevator open and we stepped out into the hallway. Walking all the way down to room 420.

I unlocked the door to our dorm, stepping into our living room and closing the door behind us. "I need a nap." Dina said as she started to make her way towards her bedroom. "You go do that, I'm going to get started on this." I made my way over to the coffee table in the living room, picking up the game. I walked over to the Ps5, and turned it on.

I put the game into the console and waited for the installation to finish. After everything was ready, I opened the game and started to play. There was many deaths and having to redo shit over and over again. I played until my brain was exhausted from all the focusing. Fuck this, I need a nap. I play more later. Saving and closing out the game, I turned off the Ps5. I got up off the couch and walked into to my bedroom.

Closing the door behind me, I threw myself onto the bed. Tiredness flooded through my body. I shut my eyes, allowing myself to fall asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"...ou shut the fuck up, and get over yourself." I slightly open my eyes to the sound of people arguing. Dina was looking over at Ellie who was standing behind Jesse in the doorway of my room. "What are you guys doing..?" I asked sleepily, sitting up.

Fully becoming aware of the tension that was in the room, I look from Dina to Ellie. "Everything is fine. I had come in here to wake you up and let you know you had a person at the door asking for you." Dina looked from me to Ellie, with a glare. "And someone being the asshole she is, told the person at the door the fuck off, along with more colorful words." I looked over at Ellie, who now held a glare towards Dina.

"The bitch isn't important. I could give a fuck less on why she was here." The bickering between Ellie and Dina picked up. What the fuck is even happening right now? Watching them go back and forth, almost unable to make out their words with them speaking over each other. "Who the fuck are you guys talking about? In case you forgot, I was fucking asleep." They went silent, as I looked at them both grumpily. "From what it looks like, you woke me up from my nap to fucking argue in my room." Ellie rolled her eyes, turning to leave the room without any more words.

Dina let out a sigh, Jesse nodded his head and followed out the room after Ellie. "Kat was at the door asking for you." I sat there for a second thinking. "How'd she know what dorm was mine?" Dina let out another sigh, "Well her and Ellie used to hang out a lot here with me whenever they was dating." ooohhh yeahh, Kat did see Dina was the room mate I was looking for the night of the party. "Sorry for Ellie acting that way... she's still dealing with her angry.. feelings.. towards Kat." I nodded my head letting Dina know I was listening.

She paused looking towards my doorway and then back at me, "You know, Kat lives on the 2nd floor if you'd like to go down and see her?" Dina spoke softly. "Why are you telling me this.?" I looked at her confused, slightly shaking my head. "Maybe because you find her really pretty, and so you can go see what she was here for?" Of course she's trying to send me off the Kats. She smiled at me. "I'm sorry for waking you up, It was supposed to be for you to go to the door, but Ellie had fucked that up and... you seen how it was going." She let out a small laugh.

It wouldn't hurt to go down to see her since she did come to my dorm. Plus what if she's into me? My words are gone, I can finally love who I want to love. "Do you know her room number?" A smile shot across Dinas face. "It's 227." She was practically shoving me off my bed now, "Go talk to her!" Stumbling a bit out of my room, "Okay! okay I'm going. Jesus fucking Christ man."

Jesse and Ellie looked over at us from the couch in the living room. "Where you going?" Jesse called out to me. Before I could form a sentence, Dina was pushing me out the door. "They're going down to see Kat." The door shut behind me. There was some faint muffled shouting that I could hear coming from the dorm as I walked down the hallway, towards the elevator.

Chapter Text

After knocking, the dorm door opened revealing Kat. Her lips forming a smile, "Hey, what are you doing here?" She opened the door more, motioning for me to come inside. There's so much art on the walls. "Yeah, I'm sorry about.. all of that.. upstairs. I was asleep when you had came to the door." I looked around her dorm room more, taking in her decorations. "I was wondering why you had asked for me?" Finally looking in her direction to see she's already looking at me.

A flash of nerves crossed her expression as she looked down slightly, "Yeaahh.. I was, wanting to ask you out on a date." She let her eyes roam the floor of her dorm. Hmm she wants to take me out? "What kind of date?" Kat looked up from the floor to me. "I was thinking a nice dinner, whatever you wanted to eat. Then we come back to my dorm, or we could go to yours and watch a movie together with some snacks. I want you to be comfortable so you have all the say in it." I was nodding my head while listening to her explain.

This shit sounds really nice. I deserve this. "I'm down for a nice dinner date and movie afterwards. We can do it here in your dorm, since I don't ever know when Ellie is going to be over at mine." I watched Kats mood faulter for a split second. "Yeah, that works for me." She walked more into her living room and sat on the couch, looking up at the ceiling.

I walked over and sat beside her, "Can I ask you a personal question?" Kat turned her head to look at me, "Go for it." She spoke softly to me. I took in a breathe and let it out. "What happened between you and Ellie?..... I know that yall were.. a thing.. but like.... what went so wrong for her to act the way she does..?" There was a long silent pause. We sat there looking at each other for what felt like forever.

Kat started blinking her eyes slow then fast before looking away from me. Aw fuck, I shouldn't have asked. This was way too soon, I don't even know her. "I wish I could tell you." Her voice cracked next to me. "It feels like it happened so fast. We were happy and great the first few months.. yeah Ellie was distant with me... we never had sex.. she hadn't even touched me in any way.. besides a hug.." Kat paused and took in a breathe before continuing.

"She would never comminate and tell me why... why couldn't the relationship be more serious.. why couldn't we sleep over at each others place.... why couldn't we shower.. or even change clothes in the same room..." I felt myself getting sad from hearing her side. Before I could stop myself, I was leaning over and giving Kat a hug. "I wanted to feel loved.. and she couldn't provide that for me... so I broke up with her."

Those words didn't sit right with me. I sat there in that hug and thought. Kat ended things with Ellie? Tears started to seep through my shirt on my shoulder. But Jesse mentioned at the party that Ellie broke it off with Kat.?? She was now speaking in soft sobs, "It felt like the only thing I could do at that point... she'd tell me that it's a her thing.. and she's not ready..." Funny how I remember that fact considering that state I was in that night.

Kat took a deep breathe in and out, I felt her body relax in the hug. "You don't have to talk about her anymore. I didn't realize how much it'd hurt you with how Ellie is acting." I wonder if I can just ask Dina for Ellies side? Is this nosey of me? Well I'm already being nosey, so what does it matter.

We started to back out of the hug, "Thank you for listening, it felt nice to finally let that out." She let out a little laugh while wiping her nose. "Pretty hot of me to cry on you after asking you out on a date, huh?" A smile formed on my lips, "Oh, so hot" I replied with a soft laugh.

My stomach grumbled a little reminding me I need to eat something. Ooooo I should ask Dina if she wants to go have a roomie dinner! "Well you have my number now so you better text me." I started to walk backwards towards the door. "I need to head out to go do room mate shit" Kat was now walking with me towards the door. "Yeah you're all good, go do what you got to do." She opened the her dorm door for me. "I'll send you a text from now on instead of going to your dorm" We both giggled at her little joke.

Stepping out of her dorm, "That's probably the best thing to do" I started my walk down the hall to the elevator, giving Kat a wave bye before turning away from her door. Alright, so I'm going to go on a date with Kat. Butterflies started to fill my stomach. I no longer have the scarred words on my body so I should be able to be with who I want. The elevator doors open and I step inside heading up to my floor.

A pain burned through my lower hip. Ow motherfucker. I took in a deep breathe and let it out. That was odd. I placed my hand over the pain to try and subdue it. A throbbing sensation now added to the burning pain. What the fuck is happening? My body was now starting to feel as if I was overheating. Everything around me seemed to be spinning. I reached for the floor of the elevator before darkness consumed my vision.

Ellies POV

It seems like they don't remember anything from last night.? Or they're just not bringing it up..? During breakfast, I couldn't bring myself to speak any words to them. My mind constantly repeating what they spoke to me, 'Do you hate me?' The words I've been dreading to hear all my life, sounded so beautiful coming from their lips.

"Yeah, I was going to shower real quick" A muffled voice spoke in the background with foot steps and a door closing. "Do you guys wants me to grab anything at the gaming store?" Dina pulled me from my thoughts while she walked to her room to get ready. "Nah, I'm all set on games at the moment." Jesse had called out loud enough for her to hear. Ah what the fuck? A stinging pain ran through my lower hip. It stings, why the fuck does it sting? "Ellie?" Trying to no longer focus on the pain, I looked up at Dina. "Are you okay?" She looked at me concerned. "Yeah, just having a random pain. Nothing to worry about." I reassured my friend as she nodded her head and continued to do the things she need in order to get ready.

The sting became manageable to deal with, though it started to throb. Jesse had finally got the game set up when Dina had came back out of her room. "Now that we kind of have a little alone time, what do yall think of my new roomie?" She plopped down onto the couch between me and Jesse. "I like them, they fit the vibe of our group perfectly." Jesse spoke and smiled. He and Dina both looked in my direction now. "Eh." I shrugged.

"What?" Dina seeming lost. What the fuck am I supposed to say about them? How they make me feel? Or how pretty I find them? Or what that I want to get to know them? Fuck no. "They're alright. I don't really care for them." I shrugged again, acting like it's no big deal. Dina now squinting her eyes at me. "So then what was the shy act you put on at the breakfast table?" My eyes almost popped out of my head. "Yeah I seen you how you blushed just from them looking at you." I felt my face heat up slightly, as I now looked down at my hands.

The bathroom door opened causing all of our head to snap in that direction. Holy fuck. There they were in a towel. Get ahold of yourself bitch. I felt myself watch them walk into their bedroom. "Ehem." The sound of Dina clearing her throat brought my attention back to her. "What?" I scoffed at them. "Can we play the game now?" Dina smiled evilly. "Nope, I need Jesses help real quick with something." She then grabbed his hand and dragged him off the couch and into her bedroom. Fucking great.

I pulled my phone out and went through snapchat stories to fill my time. The sound of a bedroom opening was loud for me to hear. "Do you know if Dina is getting ready still?" A warm feeling spread through my body. Infront of me stood Dina's room mate. I looked up from my phone and felt my eyes taking in their presence. Holy fuck they look so good. I nodded my head and pointed towards Dinas room. I forced my focus back down onto my phone. If I stare any longer, I'm going to come off as creepy.

I let myself zone off into my phone until Dina busted out of her room, "Wait, wait I'm coming!" She sped walked past the couch and met her roomie at the front door. A laugh came from her room mate, making my heart skip a beat. How is it that this beautiful person is supposed to be my soulmate.? Guilt washed over me. Will they be upset whenever they find out..? "I was just going down to wait for you." They don't even remember speaking their first words to me.. "Don't burn our place down!" Dina called out as she closed the door behind them.

So I need to speak to them for them to find out. I felt my breathing go shaky. What do I even say to them? My chest was starting to tighten. Am I even ready for this? A hand was placed on my shoulder, slightly calming me down. "You okay Williams?" Jesse looked at me with concern. "Yeah, I think I just need to go lay down and take a nap." I stood as he nodded his head. "Call or text me if you need anything, okay?" I walked over to the dorm door and opened it, "Yeah, I will." Stepping out into the hallway, Jesse closed the door behind me. I'm glad he doesn't pry whenever I don't want to talk.

I walked down the hallway to the elevator to head up to my room. My heart was still racing inside my chest. Taking in deep breathes trying to calm myself. The doors to the elevator opened and I stepped on, pressing the number ten. Have I already fucked everything up with how I've been acting? I stood there with this thought weighing on me. Just because the universe made us for each other doesn't mean they have to accept me as their life partner. *ding* The sound of the elevators doors opening snapped me out of my thoughts.

I made my way down the hall to my room 511. Unlocking my door and stepping inside to close the door behind me. Would it be wrong of me just to avoid them until I feel ready? Walking through the living room, straight to my bedroom. Could I even treat them right? Not bothering to change, I lay down on my bed and stare up at the ceiling. I wonder where my words are at on them? Rolling over to my side and closing my eyes. What are the words that I say to them? I take in a deep breathe and try to force myself to sleep. More and more thoughts cloud my mind.

Getting out of bed, I reach for the bong and grinder that's on my nightstand. I load myself a bowl and enjoyed a little smoke sesh to myself. I walk back over to my bed and let myself fall on top of it. My eyes close as I let myself relax and drift off to sleep.

*ding* *ding* *ding* The sound of texts coming through my phone waking me up. Huh? I reach over and grab the phone seeing Dina and Jesse text in our groupchat.

Annoying Bitches

Dina - ellie did you get Resident Evil 4 the remastered version on the Ps5 not too long ago???

Jesse - yeah, she beat it in a few days.

Dina - could my roomie borrow in to play??? the store didn't have it in stock and don't know when they will.

I guess I wasn't asleep for long. I reread the text messages. Hm Resident Evil 4, they have good taste in games.

Annoying Bitches

Yeah they can borrow it, I bring it down to yalls dorm - Ellie

Getting out of bed, I make my way to the living room where my games and console are at. I grab Resident Evil 4 and head out of my dorm. I walk down the hallway to the elevator and step on when the doors open. Would it be weird to stay and watch them play? My stomach getting butterflies. Probably best that I don't. The doors of the elevator open and I step into the hallway walking down to room 420. Knocking on the door for Jesse to open it.

With him opening the door, I step inside. "Look at you doing favors for someone you don't really care about." I rolled my eyes walking past him and into the living room. "I'm doing this favor for Dina." I scoffed and set the game down on to coffee table. You're so full of shit Ellie. "Yeah, Dina is definitely the one that wants to play this game." Jesse said while laughing a little. "Whatever. I'll be back later to smoke with yall." I spoke and walked to the elevator to go back up to my room. I pulled my phone out to send a text.

Annoying Bitches

I left the game on the coffee table - Ellie

Maybe I can talk to them when I come back. I laugh lightly to myself. It's insane that I find myself wanting to be around them now. Opening the door to my dorm, I walk into the living room and grab a comic off the table to read. Sitting down and getting comfy on the couch, I let myself get lost in the story. Starting from the start of the book, then page after page. Not wanting to finish the comic, I stop at the halfway point, setting the comic back down on the table.

I walk over to my stash that in my cabinet. I should probably head back up to Dinas now, its been a while. Grabbing a few grams and putting them in a baggie to put in my pocket. I head out of my dorm and into the hall to go to the elevator. I hope her room mate is playing the game. I step onto the elevator and press the number eight. Everything feels so different now I know how close my soulmate is to me.. after thinking I'd never find them.... and here they are.. *ding* The doors of the elevator open and I head down the hall to room 420.

Reaching the room, I knock on the door. Dina opened it with a smile, "There you are!" I walked inside the dorm and into the living room. "Here I am." I smiled back at her. So far all I see is Dina and Jesse. I sat down onto the left side of the couch. "You guys ready to smoke?" I pulled out the baggie that held the weed.

"Dude fuck yes! It's just going to be us smoking, the roomie is passed out in their room." I shrug my shoulders, "That works with me." Well that sucks ass. "Imma go grab your bong from your room." Jesse stood up and walked into Dinas room. As I added the weed to Dinas grinder that was sitting on the coffee table, Dina spoke me to in a soft whisper. "Do you want me to go wake them up to smoke with us?" My eyes drifted away from the grinder and met Dinas eyes.

"What?" I looked at her lost. Her eyes glanced from her door back to my eyes. "Do you want me to go wake up my room mate to smoke with us?" Do I take this chance to see them or do I put it off more? I took in a deep breathe and shook my head. "No, let them sleep." Dina nodded her head understanding. Jesse returned back to the living room holding Dinas bong, handing me the bowl as he passed me to sit back down on the couch.

*knock knock knock* Light knocking could be heard, causing Dina to stand up and go see who was at the door. "Oh hey Kat.. what are you doing here.?" Dinas confused voice caught my attention as I was loading the bowl. Kat? What the fuck. The voice responded but I couldn't hear what they had said. "Yeah, they're home. They're asleep in their room right now." Is Kat asking Dina about her room mate? My blood starting to boil. What the fuck does she want with my soulmate? Another response that I couldn't hear. "Yeah, I'll go get them." Jesse was now standing and making his way over to the door. "Oh hey Kat." Giving her a slight wave.

Before Dina could walk towards her room mates room, I was getting up off the couch and made my way over to the door. "What the fuck are you doing here?!" My voice coming off harsh. Dina and Jesse were now standing between me and Kat. "None of your fucking business." My friends now putting their hands on my shoulders and making me walk backwards. "Well you have no business being here. So why don't you fuck off and go make someone elses life miserable." Jesse being the one to keep having me back up while Dina went to the door apologizing to Kat and closing the door.

"What The Fuck is wrong with you Ellie?" Dina turned towards me with anger. "They were here to ask my room mate a question. And you felt the need to yell at them, for what?" I stood there calming my breathing down, not realizing how amped up I got. "I don't want Kat around any of yall." Dina scoffed, "You don't have any to who we hang out with, or who my room mate hangs out with. Especially when it has nothing to do with you."

Dina was now walking into her room mates room. "I'm at least going to wake them up so they have them up and see what they want to do." She opened her room mates door and stepped inside. "Oh so you want Kat to ruin her life too." Dina rolled her eyes at me. "would you shut the fuck up, and get over yourself"

Get over myself? "You of all people should understand, Kat was awful to me." I replied to Dina only for her to respond quickly "Awful to you? You weren't much of a girlfriend to her."

"What are you guys doing...?" A tired voice spoke up causing us to go quiet. Good fucking going Ellie, everyone loves being woken up this way. "Everything is fine. I had come in here to wake you up and let you know you had a person at the door asking for you." Dina turned towards me with a glare, "And someone being the asshole she is, told the person at the door to fuck off, along with more colorful words."

I held the same glare Dina was giving me. "That bitch isn't important. I could give a fuck less on why she was here." Mostly, I don't want Kat around them.

"It sure did upset you enough for you to say something." That struck a nerve.

Mine and Dinas argument kept going back and forth until interrupted. "Who the fuck are you guys talking about?" We were now being glared at by this beautiful human. They looked so grumpy and tired. "In case you forgot, I was fucking asleep. From what this looks like, you woke me up from my nap to fucking argue in my room." I've fucked up enough today, I'm done with this. I rolled my eyes and turned to leave the room. Jesse was soon following behind me out into the living room

Sitting myself down on the couch with Jesse sitting opposite from me. I really didn't have the right to act that way.. fuck.. "You wanna tell me what happened back there?" I don't want my ex and soulmate anywhere new each other. My soulmate who has no idea I'm theirs... since I have yet to speak to them. "Ellie?" Jesses voice snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Knowing Kat was at the door pissed me off." Lie. "I found out yesterday she had cheated on me, wearing my shit, during the last month of us dating.. with a fucking dude." Another lie, I could give a fuck less about that now I know my soulmate is so close. "After how shitty she was to me, she just has to top it off with cheating." Okay that's a truth. Shit hurt me, that was fucked of her. Jesse was nodding his head listening. "Damn.. then you acting that way was valid."

The sound of stumbling caught mine and Jesses attention. Out came the beautiful person with Dina pushing them from behind. "Okay! okay I'm going. Jesus fucking Christ man." Dina was pushing them towards the door of the dorm. "Where you going?" Jesse has called out to Dinas room mate. Before they could speak, Dina shoved them out the door. "They're going down to see Kat." Then closing it behind them.

"Why would you do that Dina?!" I found myself shooting up off the couch. "Do you want them to get hurt?" Dina was now standing there with her arms crossed, looking at me with a dead stare. "I don't see what the problem is, It's not like you're ever going to give them a chance." My pacing stopped as I stood there.

Jesse stood up off the couch speaking towards Dina. "Kat did cheat on Ellie...she may just want your room mate to not get hurt." Dina scoffed, "Do you forget how Ellie was in that relationship. She was practically dragging Kat along with small kisses." I'm still here guys. "So that gives Kat the excuse to cheat?" Thanks Jesse. "No, but it doesn't mean she's going to treat my room mate that way. They seem more loving than Ellie is." I nodded my head, lifting my head to look at Dina.

"You're right, your room mate probably is more loving than me... doesn't mean Kat should be the one to be with them.." Jesse and Dina turn their attention towards me. "So what does it mean.? You should be the one to be with them then.?" Dina asked me questioningly. I shook my head slowly, taking a few steps back. "I don't know what it means.." Do I tell them about the scarred words on my body?

No.. they can't know before my soulmate even has the chance to find out... fuck me.. I have to do something soon... "Just that they can't be with Kat.?" Dinas voice speaking soft now. Or anyone. I don't want to see them be with anyone. "You realize none of us have a say in what they do, right? It's their choice." My breathing starting to become shaky. "Yeah.." As I nodded my head.

A peaceful silence fell between all of us. Dina was the first to speak while going to sit on the couch. "Come on, let's smoke this bowl. Seems like we all need a hit right now." Jesse patted my shoulder as we walked to the couch to sit on the opposite side of Dina. "You get greens." She handed me the bong, and lit the bowl for me. I passed the bong to Dina as I exhaled. What the fuck do I do now.?

"You know, whatever you have going on in your head. You can talk to us about." Dina spoke as she exhaled the smoke, passing the bong to Jesse. He nodded his head while inhaling his hit. "Thanks guys.. I'm just.. not sure I'm ready to be.. open about it yet.." I spoke slowly trying to find the right words. I at least need to talk to the person who has my words on their body.

We passed the bong around a few more times, loading bowls whenever we finished. "I'm going to go ahead and head back to my dorm before I crash on your couch." Dina and Jesse laughed watching me get up off the couch. "See you tomorrow?" Dina called out as I reached the door. "Yeah, I'll see yall tomorrow." I smiled I opened the and walked out into the hallway.

A burning pain in my lower hip caught my attention. It's in the same spot as the stinging pain from earlier. I place my hand over the pain, adding pressure to try and stop it. Its in the spot.. of my scarred words.? That's weird..

I continued my walk down the hallway to the elevator, the burning pain now throbbing. Motherfucker this hurts! The elevator was coming up to the floor as I stood there trying not to focus on the pain in my lower hip. *ding* The doors of the elevator open, revealing the one person that's been on my mind, unconscious.

Chapter Text

Readers POV

What happened..? Opening my eyes and taking in my surroundings. I was laying on the couch.. in the living room.. of my dorm.? When did I get back here.? Looking around more I see three people talking with each other. Ellie was the only one facing me while Dina and Jesse's backs were towards me as they talked. Worry and stress was written all over her face. What's up with her.?

Ellies eyes moved and made eye contact with me, causing her to stop talking midsentence. Dina and Jesse looked back to see she was looking at me. "Oh my god how are you feeling?" Dina was now rushing to my side. She reached and touched my forehead. "You're not burning up anymore." I looked at her confused, "What happened to me..?"

"I could ask you the same thing. Ellie knocked on the dorm door and I open it to find you passed out in her arms. She had found you in the elevator like that and carried you here. Your body was radiating heat." Dina spoke looking at me worried. Ellie found me and carried me here..? I looked from Dina to Ellie to see she hasn't move from her spot. "Thank you.." My voice came out weakly. She simply nodded her head, blinking out of a daze.

"Do you remember anything?" Dina asked me still kneeling beside on me. I looked away from Ellie and stared up at the ceiling. I left here.. went to Kats dorm... she asked me on a date.. told me things that happened between her and Ellie... I left her dorm to come back here.. pain.. i felt a burning pain.. and it was unbearably hot.. then I woke up here..

I turned my head to look at all of them. "I think I overheated in the elevator.. there was also this burning, throbbing pain.. " Ellies eyes slightly widened before blinking a few times. Dina and Jesse were looking at me concerned, "Is the burning pain still there?" I shook my head no.

"Would you mind helping me to there shower? I feel gross and sticky from all the sweat." I looked at Dina with a pleading look. She smiled at me, "Yeah I got you roomy." She grabbed my arm and helped me sit up, and get off the couch. We walked past Jesse then Ellie to get to the bathroom. Jesse giving me simple head nod and Ellie stood there, seemingly in deep thought.

We reached the bathroom and Dina guided us inside. "Do you need help with getting in?" She asked me caringly, setting me down on the toilet lid. I glad I have her as my room mate. "No, I think I can handle the rest." I don't need her seeing my cuts. I'm sure that'd cause her to worry more, and then I can't explain my reasoning. "I'll shout if I need anything." She nodded her head and left the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

I stood up with wobbly legs, using the wall to keep my balance. Pulling my top over my head slowly, followed my sports bra. I slide my sweats down almost falling over. "You okay in there?" Dina's voice coming from the other side of the door. I laughed a little, "Yeah, no need to worry."

I took my boxers off, my reflection catching my attention from the corner of my eyes. No. Fucking. Way. The cuts on my lower hip were completely gone, now replaced by the scarred words. As if nothing happened. I looked down at my body, touching the words with my fingers. How is this fucking possible?

My legs gave out on me, causing me to fall down onto that hip. Dina came hurrying through the bathroom door, closing it behind her. I feel so low on energy. "Okay, I know you said you could handle this, but I feel like I need to be in here since you just fell over." She grabbed my arms and slowly helped me to my feet. I stare at her blankly, still in shock from seeing the words on my body.

"For your own safety." She came me a caring look as she helped me get inside of the shower. "You okay with having a sitting shower?" I nodded my head, as she helped me sit down, turning on the water to the right temperature. "Just so it's easier on you." Dina closed the shower curtain, giving me the space to shower on my own. My heart was now racing. I don't think I can ever escape this.

"Thank you for helping me Dina.." I spoke out in a soft tone loud enough for her to hear. "What else are roomies for? We're family now, and we take care of each other. I will always be here for you for any and everything." She replied to me with a comforting voice

Anything..? I took in a deep breathe and let it out trying to calm myself. I need to talk to someone about this at least.. I grabbed the shampoo and started to wash my hair, since I've been sitting under the streaming water. "Could I talk to you about a thing whenever I'm done showering..?" I took in a shaky breathe and let it out while speaking, "There's something I need to really get off my chest.."

The burning pain... the throbbing... the over heating.. my body was reacting to the cuts.. but how did it completely heal them to no scars, and my words unscathed...?

I rinsed my hair out and put conditioner in my hair. "Like I said, I'll always be here for any and everything." While washing my body I spoke softly, "Thank you Dina.." My voice echoing off the walls of the bathroom. I start to wash my face and then rinsing everything off. "I'm all done.. can you help me with turning the water off.?"

Dina opened the shower, with a towel around in her arm, as she reach out and turned off the water. Immediately after she was reaching out for my arms and helping me to my feet, and wrapping the towel around my body. "Come on, you can dry off more in your bedroom." With that she was walking me towards the bathroom door and out through the living room. Jesse was focused on the tv, while Ellies head turned in our direction the minute the bathroom door was opened. Her eyes scanned over me and Dina walking towards my room.

I allow Dina to lead me into my bedroom, and help me sit on my bed. She walks to my dresser and pulls out a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. While sitting on my bed, I use the towel that's wrapped my body to dry off the excess water. Dina makes her way back over to me, holding out the boxers for me to slide up my legs. I set in one foot at a time, and grab the hem to pull up to my waist. As I finish putting the boxers on, Dina has my shirt ready to put over my head and onto my body.

"Thank you.. again.." My voice came out soft as Dina was helping me get dressed and settled back onto my bed. "You're gonna have to stop saying thank you eventually." She laughed lightly as she spoke to me. I small smile formed on my lips, "I know, I know. You already said you'd be here for anything." My smile starting to disappear as anxiety starts to form in my chest.

I took in a deep breathe, "I need your help.. or advice.. or I.. fuck. I don't know what to do at this point.. I don't think there's even anything I can do now.. I mean I know what I can do, but it doesn't feel fucking easy.. it.. -" Words were stumbling and pouring of my mouth as I spoke to Dina

"and now I agreed to go on a date with kat.. I can't go on a date with her.. what the fuck was i thinking.?! Everything is fucked now.. All because of these stupid fucking words.. I don't know how much long-" Dina grabbed my shoulders to pull me from my rant. Holy fuck I didn't realize how heavy I was breathing. "breathe buddy.. in through your nose and out your mouth slowly. Take you time. Everything is okay."

With Dinas reassuring words, I felt myself ease up. She removed her hands from my shoulders and sat back a bit on my bed. "What words are you talking about.?" Her voice laced with confusion.

There's no going back now. I wanted to get this off my chest, and here's my opportunity. "Before I tell you.. can you swear that this will remain between us.?" I let my eyes met Dinas in a serious manner. "Yes I swear, this is your secret that you're choosing to share with me." Dina spoke while nodding her head.

"I trust you.." Silence fell before us and I sat there taking breathes in through my nose and out my mouth trying to remain calm. "I have the mark." My words came out hushed. Dina looked at me completely lost. Ah yes, to be in a world where soulmates are just about nonexistent. "As in... having a soulmate... their first words are scarred onto my body.."

Dinas jaw slowly started to drop as she took in the new information. "I've had it all my life.. and I've tried to get rid of it.. I'm stuck with it forever.." Dina was now slightly shaking her head trying to wrap her head around all of my words.

"So you're telling me the whole soulmate thing is actually real? and you tried to get rid of it, why?" She looked genuinely curious. Nodding my head, with a defeated sigh. "Yes.. it's real.." I lifted my shirt, and lowered the hem of my boxers to reveal the words. Dinas eyes widened. "I attempted to cut over the words and they came back. I don't understand how everything just healed and the words are back on my body unchanged."

Sitting there watching Dina take in all the information, I continued to speak. "I didn't want this life. I don't want to feel helpless trying to find the one person made for me, especially in this fucking world." I let go of the hem of my boxers and let my shirt drop back down. "How many couples have you met that are soulmate?... I've met none... they practically don't exist... you had just asked me if it was actually real.." Tears were now streaming down my face.

"Wow, that's a lot to take in... I'm sorry that you've been keeping this in all to yourself... When did it heal back to normal if you don't mind me asking?" Dina was now wiping my tears with her hands. "I think it's what made me overheat and pass out.." She was nodding her head listening to me. "It was a burning pain at first then it started to throb after I left Kats dorm." Kat.. fucking hell... I took in a deep breathe. "It was after I agreed to go on a date with Kat.."

Dina just about jump off the bed. "You agreed to go on a date with Kat?! You just told me you the mark of having a soulmate. What were you thinking?" I deserve to find love on my own. I shook my head, "I thought the words were gone.. they were covered by cuts.. I was hoping I was free to love on my own.."

Free to love who I want.. to finally be able to experience love.. "Oh, honey.." Dina stepped forward to give me a hug as I remained on the bed. "What can I help you with? Would you still want to go on that date with Kat?" I shook my head no against her collarbone. "I don't feel comfortable going on a date with someone who I know isn't my soulmate, now I know that I'm stuck with this forever... I already hurt enough people in my past not being able to love them fully.. "

"Well I can type out a text to send to Kat to let her down gently, will that be helpful?" Dina took a step back to be able to look me in the face. "Please.." My voice now barley above a whisper. "While I'm at it, I'm going to send Jesse out to grab us all dinner." She let go of me and walked towards my bedroom door.

Opening the door, she stuck just her top half out and called out to her boyfriend. "Hey babe, would you mind running out and grabbing dinner for us please? I was thinking that one pizza shop we really like." I wasn't able to make out his response whenever he replied. "Thank you so much, We'll be right out in a second to hangout with you Ellie." There was pause. I guess Ellie was now talking. "Okay, only to grab that. You better be back soon."

Dina closed the door with a smile. "Jesse is about to head out to grab pizza for us, and Ellie is running to her dorm to grab some more bud for us to smoke." The sound of the front door closing could be heard faintly. Dina walked back over to my head and sat down. "Okay, are you ready?"

I nodded my head and grabbed my phone from the nightstand. Unlocking the phone, I see that I had a text from a random number letting me know that it was Kat. This feels so fucked of me.. I stuck the phone out towards Dina for her to take. I felt the weight of the phone leave my hand.

Dina was already typing away. I sat there quietly waiting for her to finish. I hope she's at latest being nice and letting her down gently. A few minutes go by and I think the front door of our dorm opened and closed. "Alright.. here you go" She handed the phone back to me. "Is this okay?" I looked down at my phone to read the message

Hey this is Kat :) - (206)-555-8934

Hey.. I'm sorry to be sending this text.. I've had some time to think to myself, and I'm not ready to be with someone romantically. I don't feel that it's fair to you, for me to go on a date with you. I don't want you to feel strung along, you deserve better than that. I hope that you understand that I need time to love myself, before I try to love someone else. - y/n

She worded it better than I ever could. I pushed the send button. "It's perfect.. Thank you Dina.." I smiled at her softly. "Now that we got that taken care of, let's go smoke! Ellie should be back by now." Dina hopped off my bed and walked over to my door, opening it and peeking out. "Yep, she's back. Do you want help getting to the living room?" She looked back at me sitting on my bed.

"No, it's okay. I kinda wanna lay in bed a bit longer. Yall are more than welcome to come smoke in here if you want." I suggested as I got under my covers. Dinas face lit up then she ran out into the living. She came back pushing Ellie into the room, them both having the smoking essentials. "We're having our sesh in here today since my roomie needs rest." Dina closed the bedroom door behind them.

"Well if they're needing rest, why are we in here?" Ellie started walking towards the door, Dina blocked her and directed her to a chair in my room. "They told me they were okay with us smoking in here if we wanted to, and I want to." Dina spoke matter-of-factly and she sat on a chair opposite of Ellie.

*ding* *ding* *ding* Dinas phone started to go off beside her. I felt my eyes moved from Dina's phone, over to Ellie. She was focused on loading a bowl into the bong. I sat there taking in her facial features. God she has an amazing side profile. Butterflies start to form in my stomach. I let myself look at the slit in her eyebrow, to her eye lashes to her freckles that were scattered across her face, and down to her lips. They were slightly parted from focusing.

"Ugh, fuck." The sound of Dina setting her phone down, pulled my attention away from Ellie. "Jesses card isn't working and he didn't take any cash with him. I gotta head to the pizza shop to pay. I'll be back soon. Would you mind helping my roomie while I'm gone Ellie, please?" Dina was gathering her stuff and walking towards my door. Before I could speak a word, Dina spoke again. " I know you're going to say you don't need any help, but you still can't walk on your own. It'd make me more comfortable leaving knowing that you're going to be okay. Okay? I love you guys." With that, the door of my bedroom was closed.

It's just me and Ellie now.. in my bedroom.. alone.. I felt my eyes drift from the door, over to Ellie. She was already looking at me, and our eyes made immediate contact. She looked down at the bong in her hand, then held it up in my direction. Okay.. so she's still not going to talk to me.

"You can have greens, I'll take a hit after you." She nodded her head and got up out of the chair she was sitting on. Ellie walked over to my bed and sat on the edge, lighting up the bowl and breathing in her hit. She held the bong out to me, and I put my mouth against the piece, taking in my hit.

The bong still in her hand, as I was breathing in. I let my eyes look up into hers with a head nod, and she lifted the bowl for me. I blew out my hit, "You're good to have the rest, I don't want to smoke much right now." Letting my self sit back more in the bed, watching her take her next hit. Ellie was looking down, back to being focused on the bong. She looks so pretty smoking.

"Thank you for being here to help, I know Dina just about forced you to." Ellie just kept smoking and nodded her head, shrugging a little bit. hmm... "You don't talk much, do you.?" I spoke trying to make some type of conversation. Yet again, Ellie nodded a bit and shrugged.

She got up off the edge of my bed and sat back in the chair, loading another bowl in the bong. "I'm really enjoying the game you let me borrow. It's insane how fast you beat it." A smile formed on Ellies lips slightly before going back to her focused face. Still, there was no reply. I let the silence fall between us. The only sound that could be heard was the bong bubbling as Ellie smoked.

I don't understand, she talks to Dina and Jesse with no problem. She hasn't even given me to get to know me. I moved in, she was cold to me. We went to a party together, she acted bothered by having to sit next to me in t he backseat. She even helped me to my fucking room when I was shit faced. Yet she refuses to talk to me.

"Have I done something for you to not want to be friends with me.?" My voice spoke out softly. Ellie shook her head no while she was breathing in her hit. "Then why don't you talk to me.?" Ellie was looking everywhere but at me, she shrugged her shoulders and took in another hit. Frustration was starting to build in my chest. "Do you think that you're better than me? Or that I don't deserve to be about of the friend group?" My voice now sounding more confident.

No response. She sat there staring down at her hands. "Do you think that low of me, that you can't bring yourself to talk?" So many emotions were building up inside of me. Fucking answer me Ellie..

"What cou-"before I could get the words out I was interrupted by a stern voice. "You're too good for me." My heart stopped inside of my chest. Ellies head was down, as her leg shook with anxiety. "You're too good for me, okay?" Her voice now softer.

Those words... They're the words that are scarred into my body...

Chapter Text

I'm pretty sure my stomach just fell out of my ass.. 'you're too good for me' Those same words I've stared at for year... The ones I never thought I'd hear...especially from her.. The tension that was built up in the room had disappeared, being replaced by a still energy. My eyes traced over Ellie, to my floor, then to my hands. Ellies the one..? I felt anxiety wash over my body.

"Speechless, huh?" Ellie spoke with a dry chuckle. I look up to met her eyes. "How long have you known?" My voice now quiet and soft. What were my first words to her? "Last night at the party.." She paused, looking down at the floor. "After we got you home, and you were in bed. You asked me a question." Okay so not only did she help me get home, she helped me get dressed? My face starting to heat up, I threw my hands over my face. "Oh god.. what did I say?" I shook my head slightly.

There was silence. I lowered my hands from my face to look at Ellie. She was staring at the floor in a daze. "Ellie?" I spoke, my voice snapping her back to reality. She was now looking at me, her eyes moving as if she were studying me. What did I say to her...? Ellie blinked a view times while looking away from me and now at my door.

"Do you hate me." She spoke almost in a whisper. "I don't hate you." I spoke with a reassuring voice trying to comfort her. Ellie shook her head, "No.. that's what you asked me." She let out a deep sigh. "And I understand. I haven't exactly been nice to you." Ellie looked over in my direction. "I'm sorry for how I've been treating you. You didn't deserve that."

I watched as her eyes scanned my face, my stomach turning into knots. "It wasn't cool of you to do... You're lucky you're really pretty and I've been wanting to be friends with you. I forgive you but I want something out of it." Ellies mouth formed a small smile. "Oh yeah? What do you want?"

"I want a day for us to hang out and get to know each other." I pause putting my finger to my mouth as if I were thinking really hard. "At your dorm." I looked to Ellie with a smile on my face. Her smile grew and she nodded her head. "We can do that, you free tomorrow?" She grabbed the bong she had set down on my table. I watched as she loaded a bowl. Jesus christ she can smoke. "Yeah."

After she inhaled and blew out her hit, she tossed her phone onto my bed. "Give me your number so I can text you in the morning." I grabbed her phone and typed in my number, saving it under 'fate'. We'll see if she figures it out. I set her phone back down onto the bed.

"Can we take this slow?" The words kind of bursting from my mouth. "I know we're soul mates and destined to be together. It would just be a lot to jump right into a relationship." Ellie was now laughing, causing me to stop talking. "Yes we're going to take this slow. Fuck man." She continued to laugh.

Ellie looks to pretty laughing and smiling. I glad that I get to see this side of her now. "Let's wait to tell Dina and Jesse. I don't want to be bombarded with questions. They don't really think that soulmates are even a thing anymore." Ellie got up off the chair and walked towards my bed, grabbing her phone.

"uhhh... I kinda already told.. and showed... Dina.." The words coming out slow and unsure. Ellie scoffed playfully, "So Dina got to see my words before I even got to." She shook her head, "Unbelievable. "Oh you mean the words on MY body." I let my head tilt to the side while speaking with a smile.

Ellie laughed lightly, "So she believed you?" I shook my head. "She was a little confused and lost until I showed her the words. I mainly told her because it's what caused me to pass out." Ellie was now leaning against my bed. "The scarred words made you pass out? How?" The sound of the dorm door closing caught out attention.

"I can tell you more about it tomorrow?" I looked away from my door to Ellie. She nodded her head and stood up, holding her hand out for me. "Need any help getting to the living room?" I think my heart just exploded. I smiled, reaching out to grab her hand. Ellie helped me out from under my covers and off my bed.

She wrapped her arm around my waist, throwing my arm over her shoulder. "You guys ready to eat?" Dina came through my bedroom door, and paused when she saw us walking towards her. "Aww, thank you so much for helping her Ellie." Dina smiled big and started to walk back towards the living room. "Not a problem at all." Ellie smiled over at me.

We walked through my door and over to the couch. Jesse had the pizza boxes set out on the table already. Dina was in the kitchen grabbing plates for all of us. "Sorry it took so long, stupid card decided not to work." Jesse shook his head as he sat down on the couch.

"It's okay, shit happens." I shrugged my shoulder, smiling. I sat back into the couch getting more comfy. My body now slightly leaning into Ellie's side. I hope this isn't bothering her. Glancing over to my side, I see that shes paying attention to what Jesses is doing on the tv. She'd make it known if I was bothering her. Feeling my body relax more, I let my head lay on her shoulder.

"Okay, I got the plates and drinks." Dina was know in the living room and setting everything down onto the table in front of us. "Looks like yall are finally getting along." Dina laughed as she sat down between me and Jesse. Ellie scoffed, "Fuck off." The only made Dina laugh harder.

Ellie moved around slightly, causing me to lean off of her to give her space. "You're all good, I was just grabbing us plates. How many pieces do you want?" Her voice spoke in a hushed tone, loud enough for me to hear. She's so sweet. "I'll take one for right now." I let myself lean onto her shoulder again as she passed me my plate.

Dina and Jesse were already eating and watching the tv. Ellie was sitting back against the couch eating her pizza and watching the tv. I held my plate with pizza on it and observed Ellie from my peripheral vision.

How is it that after all these year, finally giving up hope. That I'm here with my soulmate. I felt Ellie's body move against me as she let out a deep breathe. I swear I feel myself relaxing more and more the longer I sit next to her. "You okay?" Ellies voice pulled my from my thoughts as she looked over at me. "You haven't touched your food yet." My eyes moved from hers, down to at my food.

Everything feels heavy. "I think I'm just really tired.." I looked back up at Ellie, my eyes barley opened. "Come on, lets get you to bed." She set her plate down, standing up. Taking the plate from my hands, she set it down on the table, grabbing my hands. She pulled me up to my feet, then wrapped her arm around my waist giving me balance.

Dina with a mouth full of food looked at us confused. "They're feeling really tired, so Imma help them get to bed. I'll be back out in minute to keep hanging out with yall." Ellie was now leading me to my bedroom, taking her time for me. I don't think I'm even helping her walk me to the room.

Ellie opened my bedroom door and walking us inside, and closing the door behind her. My body feel like dead weight right now. I think I blanked out for a sec. I felt myself getting more comfy in my bed. My bed? When did she help me into bed? The covers were soon pulled over my bed, and tucked in slightly around me.

A hand pushed some hair away from my face, pausing when touching my cheek. Without thinking, I felt myself lean into the hand, letting out a relaxed sigh. Lips... Lips touched my forehead. It was a slight kiss, very faint.. but it was there. It wasn't long after that sleep soon took over.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Ellies POV

Closing the bedroom door, I walked back out into the living room. Did I just fucking kiss their head? I looked back at the closed door. Fuck. "You gonna come eat the rest of your pizza or just stare at the door?" Jesse called out to me, causing me to turn away from the door. Dina was look beside him, look at me with a pleased look.

"Thank you for pulling the stick out of your ass and finally being nice to my room mate." I made my way back over to the couch, rolling my eyes at Dina. "I was afraid it'd take you a lot longer to be decent towards them." Sitting down onto the couch and grabbing my plate that was set on the coffee table.

I glanced over to Dina, who was on my right. "Well we're hanging out tomorrow at my dorm, hope that satisfies you." I turn my attention to the tv and take a bite of my pizza. "You and them are hanging out tomorrow in your dorm?" Dina practically jumped in her seat, tucking her legs under her as she now faced me. I should've stayed fucking quiet.

"When was this planned? Are me and Jesse invited to come too? Why are your dorm, you always come here." The questions came spilling out of Dina's mouth as she took interests to the situation. Speaking up, I cut her off. "They asked to hangout one on one at my dorm. I agreed and since we're both free tomorrow, it's just how it worked out."

"OOOOOHHHH, they asked you." Dina had a big grin on her face now. "Okay, okay." She was now acting giddy as she stood up to take her and y/n plate into the kitchen. What the fuck is that about? Me and Jesse looked at each other a little lost. "Yeah.. they asked me." My attention turning back towards Dina, who was now in the kitchen.

Dinas smile kept growing bigger and bigger if that was even possible. "What is up with you now?" I eyed her suspiciously Dina was washing her plate as she glanced over at me. "Oh, nothing." Her voice in a sing song tone. Oh nothing my ass. I stood up, grabbing mine and Jesse's empty plate before walking into the kitchen.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" Dina took the places from my hands. "Nope." Then proceeded to turn back to the sink and wash the rest of the plates. I walked over to the counter to sit on the barstool.

Did they say something to Dina?? Why else would Dina be acting happy about them asking me to hang out?? Could my best friend just be excited about the fact her room mate and best friend are getting along?

Jesse walked into the kitchen talking towards Dina, "I'm going to go a head and head to my dorm. I have a class pretty early in the morning. I'll be over around lunch and you'll have the rest of the day with me." He leaned in giving her a hug and kiss. "Okay, call me as soon as you get to your dorm please." Dina walked him towards the dorm door and gave him one last kiss before Jesse left.

Dina turned towards me with a smile. "So you and my room mate are going to be alone tomorrow in your dorm?" She spoke in a teasing voice before walking towards the couch to sit. I rolled my eyes standing up from the barstool and walking towards the couch. I felt my heart beat pick up pace. "Yes, we're going to get to know each other and be friends." My tone came off monotone.

"You're not wanting anything else?" Dina's head tilted to the side. "Who says I want anything out of this?" I plopped down on the couch beside Dina. "No one... you've just never took the time to hang out with anyone one on one. Especially someone who you've been a complete dick to." She spoke in a matter of fact tone. "And as far as I know, you've never spoken a word to them. So what's caused you to change you mind and be nice aaand hang out with them."

The fact I know they're my soul mate... That I no longer have to search for them.. I just have to be better... I need to see where this goes... I want to have them in my life... I do want more out of this... I want to be any and everything for them..

"Earth to Ellie??" Dina's voice pulled me from my thoughts. I looked over to see her grinning as big as earlier. "What?" My voice coming off annoyed. "What do you think about my room mate?" I blinked a few times, trying to gather my thoughts. Breathing air suddenly felt a little harder, "uhh, I don't know. I guess they're cool for playing video games?" Now turning my attention to look around the room slightly.

Dina nodded her head, "Hmm.. Do you think they're pretty?" That question knocked the air of out me more. Can I tell Dina how I feel..? She was there for me with Kat.. she's been there for me and holds a lot of my personal shit to her self... The pause after Dinas question was long and silent.

I felt myself smile lightly, "Yeah... they're beautiful." Looking down towards the floor, I shook my head lightly hearing Dina excitedly gasp. "They told me I'm lucky I'm really pretty." Dina excited shoved me softly. "Dude shut the fuck up! When?!" Her voice speaking in a loud whisper before peaking over to her room mates door to make sure the door was still closed.

"When I was apologizing for being such as asshole towards them." Before I could continue, Dina cut me off with a fake dramatic gasp, "What, you apologized?" I laughed a little, "Yeah, I did. They told me I'm lucky that I'm pretty and they've been wanting to be friends with me."

Butterflies began to fill my stomach. "They'll forgive me but they wanted something out of it." Dina raised her eyebrow at me. "And it was for us to have a day where we hang out and get to know each other." Dina was now bouncing in her seat on the couch.

"And you agreed." Dina covered her mouth with her hands to try and quiet her excitedness. The sound of a door opening caught both of our attentions. Dina and I jumped up off the couch, Dina started making her way towards her room mate. They moved slowly out of their room before they were stopped my Dina.

"Hey, you feeling okay?" They replied in a quiet tone, I couldn't hear what was said. "I can get that for you, let's get you back to your bed." Turning around, their eyes met mine for a split second before Dina led them back into their room. I swear my heart skipped a beat.

Dina came walking out of the room mates, closing the door behind her. She made her way into the kitchen, while speaking to me. "They were thirsty and wanting some water." She grabbed a cup from the cabinet, adding a little bit of ice in it. "And you're going to bring this to them" Dina smiled to me while filling the cup with water.

"You just told them you'd get that for them." I spoke walking towards Dina, only for her to push the cup into my hand and walk past me. "I suddenly have to change because I spilled water all over my clothes." She smiled at me going into her bedroom and closing the door.

Not a big deal, I can handle taking water to them. Making my over to their bedroom door, I knock lightly before opening. "I was told to bring you this." I spoke softly walking into the room with the cup of water held out in front of me.

Their room was almost pitch black, the only light was the moon shining in through their window across from the bed. I watched a figure sit up from laying down. Their facial features showing from the moonlight. Even with their hair a mess and looking drained of life, they look breathe taking.

Confusion crossed their face as they realized who was standing in their room. "Ellie.? What are you doing here.? I thought Dina was the one that told me she'd handle it.?" Their voice speaking barley above a whisper.

"She did. She also spilled water all over her clothes and needed to change so she sent me to the rescue." I smiled now sitting on the edge of their bed, sticking the cup out for them to take. They returned the smile, grabbing the cup from my hand. "Thank you Ellie." My heart fluttered from those words.

They raised the cup up to their lip, drinking the water slowly. I watched a few drops leak from the sides of their mouth. Holy fuck.. I bet- I Mentally slapping myself and looking away to the moon shining in. Get ahold of yourself bitch.

The sound of the cup setting down on the nightstand caught my attention. Looking back over at them, we make eye contact. We sat here taking each other in. Allowing ourselves to fully look at the other. A thick tension slowly building in the room.

I watched their eyes glance back and forth between my eyes and lips, before taking their bottom lip between their teeth ever so slightly. My heart feeling as if it were going to burst out of my chest. Am I going to survive being alone with this person tomorrow?

Blinking my eyes a few times, and breaking the eye contact looking down at my hands. "I need to head out with it getting late. Drink more water whenever you can, it should help you feel better. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?" I smiled smally at them before standing up. The tension of the room vanishing almost immediately.

"Yeah, you'll see me tomorrow." Their voice still soft, and tired like. Walking towards their bedroom door, I could hear them settling back into their bed. "Goodnight y/n." Now opening their bedroom door to head out. "Goodnight Ellie." I smiled to myself walking out of their room, closing the door behind me.

Turning around, Dina standing in the living room with a giant grin on her face. "Took you long enough. To what? Bring them water?" Her smile growing bigger with each sentence. I rolled my eyes walking past her, heading to the door of the dorm.

"I'm heading to my dorm to sleep, Goodnight Dina." I spoke opening the door of the dorm and stepping out into the hallway. Dina's laugh could be heard in the dorm, "Goodnight buddy, have a good day tomorrow with my roomie." The door of the dorm closing behind me.

I'm going to be alone with them tomorrow. Completely alone. Just one on one. The realization of what I agreed to fully hitting me. There was so much tension from just looking at each other. Now it's going to be us talking more to each other, and doing activities together. Reaching the doors of the elevator, I wait for them to open.

I can't just walk away from them now. I won't have Dina or Jesse there for back up. *ding ding* The doors of the elevator opening as I stepped inside. I pressed the button 10 to head up to my floor. The memory of their eyes in the moonlight passing through my head. Watching them dart back and forth between my eyes and lips. Maybe I don't need any back up.

What's the worst that can happen? *ding ding* The doors of the elevator opening on my level. I step out onto my floor and start walking down the hallway to my dorm.

Getting to my door, I unlock it and make my way inside. The place being empty due to me not having a room mate. At least it's clean for tomorrow. I walked over to my bedroom, going inside. I glanced around my room, taking in how it looked.

My bed was messy, the blankets thrown around. The floor was clear of any mess. Art and posters cover my walls. My guitar neatly standing in the corner of the room. Looks good to me. I strip myself of my shirt and pants I wore today. Removing my sports bra and throwing a loose shirt on before sliding into bed.

Staring up my at ceiling, taking in deep breathes to try and relax myself. Okay Ellie, lets not fuck up tomorrow. Don't be Reckless. I felt my eyes growing heavy. A beautiful face that was brightened by the moonlight crossing my mind. My body and mind drifting off to sleep feeling excited.

Chapter Text

Readers POV
I wake up to the sun shining in through my window. beside me, my phone on the nightstand with the cup of water from last night. I tap on the screen of my phone to see the time. Hmm 10:30, that's not too late. There were already a texts on my screen.

Let me know when you're up and I'll send you my dorm number. -(307)587-5222

Save my number as Fate while you're at it :) -(307)587-5222

Do you like donuts? I can go and grab us some before you head over -(307)587-5222

I smiled to myself check the time she had sent them. First one 8:30 am. Second, 9:03 am. Third, 9:57 am. Looks like she's excited to hang out with me today. I start to edit Ellie's contact, and put her under the name Fate :). *ding* Another text came through on my phone.

I went a head and got us a variety choice of donuts, just made it back to my dorm. - Fate :)

My smile grew wider as I read the text. She got us breakfast!! I'm so fucking hungry now! I sat up off my bed and began typing out a text to send back.

Looks like you can't wait to have me over :) I'm getting dressed now, send me your dorm level and number! I'll be over soon to help devour those donuts :P -  Y/n

Tossing my phone onto the bed, I walk over to my closet and grab a loose black crop top with a pair of grey sweatpants. It's probably good I go over comfy. I grab a sports bra from my dresser and start putting the clothes onto my body.

I check myself in the mirror, looking over my outfit. Yeah, this is cute and comfy. I run my fingers through my hair a few times, fixing the strands that are crazy. Glancing at myself one more time to be sure that I'm satisfied with how I look. *ding* The sound of my phone going off caught my attention. I grab it off the bed and open the message.

I'm on the 10th floor, room 511. - Fate :)

hmm, I was expecting at least some type of smartass reply to my text.

About to head that way, just gonna let Dina know that I'm heading out - Y/n

I locked my phone and head out of my bedroom. Dina and Jesse were already sitting on the couch having coffee and breakfast. "You look like you're feeling much better." Dina spoke up with a smile on her face. "There's some pancakes and bacon in the kitchen if you're hungry," Jesse added.

"Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good so far. Thank you for the offer, but Ellie had gotten us donuts already so I was going to head over there to eat." I hope she got one with sprinkles. I swear the smiles that appeared on their faces were so unsettling.

"Ellie went and got donuts, at this time during the morning?" Jesse asked amusingly. "Yeah, what did you do to our friend man?" Dina laughed shaking her head.

I got her to finally talk to me. A sinking feeling flowed through my chest and down to my stomach. It took me kind of blowing up her on to talk to me.... she already figured out I was her soulmate.. I don't understand why she didn't want to talk to me if she knew.. "She feels guilty for being mean to me so now she's being a suck up." I smiled big towards my friends, walking my way towards the dorm door.

"I wish she bought us donuts after she was mean to us." Jesse was now fake pouting while eating his food. "Well you're not a Ellies type, so she's not going to." Dina slyly replied, following with a laugh. Am I Ellies type.? "It's because I'm Asian, right?" He covered his heart pretending to be hurt.

She's definitely my type, that's for damn sure. "Yeah, that's obviously what it is." Dina responded sarcastically continuing to eat her breakfast.

"I'll see you guys later, Imma go ahead and head out." I was already opening the door and waving bye as they were looking over to wave back.

I made my way down the hallway of the dorms towards the elevator. Okay 10th floor, room 511. No biggie, just going up to Ellies room... by myself.. to hang out. Reaching the elevator, I push the up button and wait for the doors to open. My heartbeat starting to pick up pace.

I hope she's forgotten about my scarred words causing me to pass out.. UGH why did I say I'd tell her more about it. *ding ding* The doors of the elevator opened and I stepped in. Looking at the buttons, I pushed the 10.

Pulling out my phone, I sent a text to Ellie.

Just got out of the Elevator and am almost at your dorm :) - Y/n

oh my god, I'm nervous. I took in a deep breathe, looking at the hallway and followed the side with odd numbers.

501.. 503.. 505.. 507.. 509.. 511.. I stood there looking at her dorm door for a second. My heart was practically about to burst out of my chest. What are you waiting for?! Knock already! I could feel my subconscious screaming at me.

Raising my hand up to the door and tapping my knuckles on the wood lightly. Within a few seconds, the door was opened and reveled Ellie.

Holy shit she looks so good. She's in a dark grey, loose t-shirt with a pair of brown cargo pants and her converse. Her hair was pulled back in the usual half up. It made her eyes and freckles pop out even more. A sly smile came into view when my eyes landed on her lips.

"You done taking in the view?" Ellie had leaned onto the door way, her eyes tracing my facing and stopping at my eyes. The sound of music coming from inside her dorm could be heard now. Is this Arctic Monkeys? Fully listening I could make out the song 'I Wanna Be Yours' being played.

I could feel my face heating up, "I don't know what you're talking about." I spoke with a peculiar tone, maintaining eye contact with her.

She totally caught me checking her out. At this point, I was mentally slapping my self.

"Oh, you have no idea what I'm talking about?" Ellie tilted her head, questioning me. My heart fluttered at that small action. I can't believe she's my soulmate.

"Nope" I spoke, popping the 'p'. I let my eyes shift back and forth between hers. "But you wanna show me the way to the donuts? I'm hungry." I smiled big at her while slight tilting my head, trying to change the subject.

With a sly smile still on her face, she rolled her eyes teasingly. Ellie stepped to the side, making room for me to walk through the door way. I walked passed her, into the dorm. The smell of sandalwood and cinnamon incense filled the air. I could feel myself breathing in deeper, enjoying the scents.

I could hear the door close behind me, followed by Ellie appearing at my side. "The donuts are over here in the kitchen." She spoke as she continued walking as I trailed behind her through the almost bare living room into her kitchen. "So, where's your room mate?" I asked as she opened the box of donuts.

oooooo she got a strawberry glazed with sprinkles. My mouth began watering.

"I don't have a roommate." Ellie reached for chocolate glazed donut while responding. oh... so you mean we're completely alone.. alone. I felt my eyes drift over towards Ellie to see her already looking at me. "No need to worry about anyone bothering us."

oh..

Heat began to rise off my skin. Is it getting hot in here or is it just me? I watched Ellie sink her teeth in the donut, biting off a piece. Breaking eye contact, I reached for the strawberry glazed donut with sprinkles, and took a bite.

I let my eyes roam around her dorm, looking everywhere but her.

Her living room dorm was pretty bare. There was a cozy looking couch against the half open kitchen wall. On the opposite wall a Tv hung. A small entertainment shelf was under the Tv with an Xbox and Ps sitting on it.

I took another bite of my donut, taking in the smokiness of the room due to the incense.

To the right of the Tv, a bedroom door was cracked open. I could hear the music being played from a speaker inside. It had moved onto a different song that I couldn't recognize.

"Is your bedroom as empty as your living room?" I let my eyes drift over meeting her eyes. Ellie chuckled before continuing to eat her donut.

"You wanna find out for yourself?" She tilted her head ever so slightly. Her eyes roaming my face.

Holy fuck.. I about damn near choked on the food in my mouth. My heart pounding a bit harder than unusual.

Get your shit together dude. Trying to settle my heart rate, I held the eye contact.

"Sounds like you want me in your room." Flirting isn't my strongest suit, okay? I'm sure that my face is all blushed up at the moment. Ellies mouth form into a smirk before walking past me,  "Well I got you in my dorm, didn't I?"

She crossed the living room and opened her bedroom door even more. Before stepping inside she looked back at me, "You coming or are you going to stand there and stare at me?"

I couldn't keep stop from smiling to myself as she disappeared into her room.

This is a completely different Ellie than who I met the other night.

Leaving the kitchen and walking to her door, the music starting to get louder the close I got. I peered inside, Ellie was now sitting on her bed lazily. She had a tray out with the grinder and was loading a bowl for her bong. The feeling of my breathe getting caught in my throat making it hard to breathe.

Is this what having and meeting your soulmate is like? She looks so ethereal with how the morning light shines on her through the window. Her green eyes standing out even more. Does she feel the same way that I feel around her?

I took my eyes off the focused girl as her room grasped my attention. Band posters scattered her walls along with drawings. Is that her artwork? I moved my eyes from her walls to a desk against a with comics and journals spread out across it. Near the desk was a guitar standing in the corner.

"No fucking way,.. you play guitar?" Fully taking the steps into her room and making my way over to the instrument.

The sound of a lighter being flicked on could be heard. I looked away from the guitar towards Ellie. She placed her mouth in the rim of the bong, inhaling the smoke. God, have i mentioned how hot stoners are.. *cough cough* she's a hot stoner.. I let myself take in her eyes half lidded as she smoked.

Ellie tilted her head up as she blew out the smoke. "Oh.. yeah. My dad taught me how to play." She shrugged, looking down at the bong then to me. She moved and held it out in front of her. I walked over to her bed, sitting on the edge. "You should play for me sometime, I'd love to hear." I smiled taking the bong from her hand.

My nerves starting to go through my body with the way her eyes looked at me. I feel like fresh meat under her gaze. I took the lighter and began taking in my hit. "Maybe I'll play for you here later on?" My heart fluttered at the suggestion. A smile forming on my face, nodding my head as I blew out the smoke.

"In the meantime, you wanna go play some video games?? That's if, you have any two player games." I passed the bong back to Ellie while asking the question. A smiled formed on Ellies face, "Fuck yeah, I have Left 4 Dead 2! Lemme smoke one more bowl and we can head to the living room." EEEEEEE I get to game with Ellie!!

Chapter Text

A faint crying same came through the Tv. " Ellie i think i found the witch." The wails began to get louder as i moved into a dark room. "Yeah, I definitely found the witch"

Our focus was locked in hard on the game. We gotten through the Dead Center and The Passing levels on the game, and we were currently on the Dark Carnival.

I wonder what going to a carnival during a time like this would be like... but a zombie apocalypse sounds so insane!

"Don't startle her yet, wait till i get closer so that i can help. I don't want you dying on me again." Ellie replied laughing towards the end.

"She caught me off guard last time, I didn't even hear her crying whenever i walked into that room!" I don't mind her laughing at me but it doesn't meant i won't try to defend myself.

The pale white body was hunched over in the dark corner of the room. Her hot pink hair covering her face as she cried into her hands.

thud.. thud.. Thud.. THud.. THUD

The sound of Ellie's character running towards me grew louder over the tv screen. "Hey don't be too loud—"

AAAAAAAAAAAHHH

The witch began screaming and sprinting towards Ellie's before I could finish my sentence.

"Help me dude!!" Her player now on the ground getting killed by the witch within seconds. I started to shoot at the witch as she turned towards me screaming.

Aw.. i'm fucked..

"Go! Run!" Ellie was yelling at the screen beside me. The witch was on me soon after and I was dead. "God, she fucks me up every time. Next round, I say we just avoid that bitch." I spoke laughing a little bit.

*Ding ding*

Ellie's phone chimed with a text. As she was reading her text and replying, I picked up my phone to check the time.

1:30 p.m. Damn we've been playing the game for a hot minute.

Ellie's POV

Looking down at my phone i had seen i gotta a text from an unknown number. hmm, what do they want?

hey you got any?  Tate sent me said you were cool-  872-564-9932

Yeah for sure Tate tell you the prices?- Ellie

yeah they told me. i was trying to get a quarter pound or half pound and as many shroom bars as possible - 872-564-9932

This is a big order for a first time buyer that i don't know.. Tate did vouched for them though, i guess it's cool since i'll be getting all this money at once

i'll get you for a qp and a shroom bar since it's your first time buying from me -Ellie

could you deliver- 872-564-9934

1674 Elm Wood Drive- 872-564-9934

delivery is an extra $20 - Ellie

bet- 872-564-9934

i'm not home , i don't get off until later tonight. cool if i just let you know when you're good to head this way- 872-564-9934

yeah-Ellie

Locking my phone and setting it onto the couch, i look over to y/n. "You wanna come with me later tonight to a deal?" Watching their eyes light up causing my stomach to do backflips.

I didn't think they'd be this thrilled to go to a drug deal with me.

"Seriously, I can go with you?!" Their posture straightened up with excitement as they smiled up at me.

I felt the ends of my mouth lifting and my heart fluttering.

"Yeah, i told you we'd have a whole day together. Plus, you won't really be apart of the deal. You're gonna stay in the car." Their eyes narrowed at me slightly.

ooo..

"What for?" Their head tilted to the side, waiting for my answer.

"I don't know this person. I'd rather know that you're safe in the car if something happens." During my reply i watch their shoulders start to relax.

A slight worried expression crossing their face.

"As long as you're safe and careful. Don't be reckless."

"Pfft, Do you know who you're talking to?" I spoke with a mockery tone to my voice.

They rolled their eyes towards me , "A hothead."

The smile on my face, grew more. I see why this person is my soulmate.. my heart felt like a bomb in my chest. they were made for me.. I let myself look at their eyes.

Taking in the color, admiring the detail of their iris. I watched their eyes move around ever so slightly.

They're just.. so...

Your POV

beautiful..

Everything about her draws me in. God her fucking smile.

"You hungry at all?" Her question made my stomach twist in hunger, causing me to realize I am actually starving. "Oh my god yes, let's go grab something to eat, i'll pay!" I replied hopping up off the couch. "You're driving though" I smiled brightly at Ellie, while walking to the dorm door. "We just gotta go to my dorm first so I can grab my wallet."

Ellie stood up from the couch, "Don't worry about it, I'll pay for it." My eyes rolled and i grabbed the doorknob, "No, seriously, I'm paying. You bought us donuts this morning." Ellie was walking to the counter to grab her keys and wallet. "Aaand I'm also buying us lunch, so deal with it."

I felt a devious smile grow on my face. "Not if I go to my dorm." I spoke while opening her door, and running out closing it behind me. Sprinting down the hallway and getting to the elevator, I was hoping that I'm fast enough to beat Ellie.

I pushed the elevator button, practically slamming my body into it, stopping myself. My heart was racing inside of my chest, waiting for the doors to open.

God could you be any fucking slower!

The sound of a door being closed could be heard from down the hallway, followed by the sound of running footsteps. *Ding* The elevator doors began to open. About fucking time!

I stepped inside of the elevator, repeatedly pushing the button to my floor.

Come on! Come on! Close already!!

The doors of the elevator began to close as Ellie slipped in-between them, using her hands to stop herself against the wall of the elevator.

Her breathing was hard as she faced the wall, leaning her forehead against it. She tilted her head a little bit to make eye contact with me. Her mouth in small teasing smile. "Thought you'd be able to out run me?"

Ellie pushed off the wall, making her way over to me. My back being against the side wall of the elevator right beside the buttons. Practically being corned by her.

"Well.. uhh—" Ellie place a hand on the wall, by the side of my face. I think my heart just stopped. "Huh?" Ellie spoke teasingly. She place her other hand on the other side, boxing me in. "What were you saying?"

*Ding*

The elevator doors opened. I ducked out under Ellies arms, stepping out of the elevator, turning back to look at Ellie while walking backwards. "I was saying how I'm going to pay for our lunch." I smile big, Ellie walking out of the elevator.

"Yeah, uh huh. That's totally what you were TRYING to say." Ellie spoke sarcastically, putting her hands in her pockets. I turned back around, heading towards my dorm with Ellie following behind me.

We reached my dorm, and I unlocked it, opening the door for us to go inside. The lights inside  were turned off. "Looks like Dina and Jesse aren't here." I spoke heading to my room. Ellie followed silently behind me. I grabbed my wallet from off of my nightstand. "Did you have a place in mind of where you wanted to eat?" Ellie asked me, leaning on the doorway of my room.

"I was thinking Raising Cane's, are you okay with that? Or is there somewhere else you'd want to eat?" We walked out of my room and left through dorm door as I was talking.

"I'm down for Cane's, I fucking love that place." Ellie slightly nodded, agreeingly.

We walked together side by side in silence, heading for the elevator. Our hands brushing against each other every now and then. My heart pounding a little more than the last each time. I wonder if she's feeling the same way.

As we reached the elevators, the doors were already opening. Dina and Jesse stepped out holding a few bags. "Oh heeyyy guys!" Dina smiles big at us. "What are you two up to?" She asked walking by us a little bit. The doors of the elevator closed.

"We had just come up to grab my wallet so that we can go grab some lunch." I raised my hand up showing my wallet. Jesse chimed in, "And Ellies making you pay?" His voice in a jokingly shocked tone.

Ellies snatched my wallet out of my hand, shoving it into her pocket. "Nope, I told them i was paying. They ignored me and wanted to grab their wallet."

She moved her attention to me, "You'll get your wallet back after I buy us food." I squinted my eyes at her challengingly. "I will reach into your pocket and take my wallet out myself."

Ellie gave me a evil smile, "Sounds like you just want your hands in my pants."

Dina and Jesse could be heard off to the side laughing, as Ellie and I were having our stare off.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" I broke the eye contact, moving to the elevator and pushed the button. I turned and looked at Dina and Jesse laughing their asses off. "Let us know if you ever get your wallet back," Jesse spoke in between the laughs. Him and Dina went of heading towards the dorm.

*Ding*

The elevator opened and we stepped inside, pressing the ground floor button. A faint snicker could be heard from Ellie. I turned to look at her questionably, "What?"

"I would like that." She spoke out loud, nodding to her self, as if she were agreeing with her thoughts.

Like what?

Ellie looked over at me, "Just so you know." Then looked back forward, waiting for the doors to open.

It then dawned on me what she had meant. My face began to heat up immediately. She wants.. no.. would like, my hands.. to be... There was now a zoo in my stomach. I couldn't stop the smile that was forming on my mouth.

*Ding*

The doors of the elevator opened and Ellies stepped out looking back at me. "You coming?" She asked, as I stood there in a daze. "y/n?" Her voice caught my attention. Oh, the doors are open. I stepped out of the elevator and stood beside Ellie.

"Sorry, I was in my own little world." I shyly smiled at her, shrugging.

We began walking out of the dorm building and through the campus.

Ellie glanced over at me, "So.. how did the words cause you to pass out?"

Im positive that my stomach dropped out of my ass.

"Let's get to your car first before talking about this. It's not exactly a light hearted thing to talk about.. especially out in the open." My voice almost as soft as a whisper.

Fuck, I was hoping to do this conversation later rather than sooner.

"Yeah, thats okay. Whenever you're ready." Ellie reassured me while we walked together.

Finally reaching the parking lot, I followed Ellie to a two-door truck. She unlocked the doors and we both climbed into the seat.

She turned on her truck and we sat there, waiting for it to warm up. I took in a deep breathe and let it out. "Okay.. so... I never thought i was going to find my soulmate.."

I looked over slowly towards Ellie to see that she's already looking at me. Her face held an expression of intense listening, like she didn't want to miss anything I said.

I turned my head down to look at my hands in my lap. "I had, um.. cut the words." I knew it was going to be hard to say to my literal soulmate, but fuck this is hard.

"I figured that since, soulmate are not a thing anymore, I could.... get rid of the words myself so—"

"You cut over them to try and caused a new scar of it." Ellie looked at me speechless. "I've thought of it but had never gone through with it."

Ellie's calmness completely threw me off guard, a weight now being lifted off my chest.

"So the cutting over the scars made you pass out?" She asked me trying to understand. I shook my head no.

"I don't think that's what caused it. It's completely healed now. I think my body over heating and passing out was my mark healing its self." Ellie nodded her head, taking in all the information.

She put her truck into drive and pulled out of the campus parking lot. "I don't understand how that's possible, It takes way longer than a day for any cut to heal."

"I'm just as lost as you are. Who can we even ask about this stuff to? I've never met anyone with a mark, let alone a soulmate." I looked over out the window as Ellie drove.

"So there's no sign of you ever cutting over the scarred words?" Ellie's glanced over from her driving, questionably, before turning her focus back onto the road.

I shook my head, "Zero, the words look as how they've always looked."

Ellie drove as we sat in silence for a little bit before reaching Raising Canes. The line had a few cars in it so we had to wait.

"Do you think you could show me your mark.? Not now, but like whenever we get back to my dorm?" Ellie asked me hesitantly.

The line moved forward a little bit. I looked over at Ellie. A tension building between us, not a bad one, but one that felt like closure.

"If I show you mine, will you show me yours?" Almost immediately Ellie softly nodded her head.

The atmosphere in the truck felt spellbinding. I barely know this person yet the connection I feel with her is otherworldly almost.

The line moved forward again, causing Ellie to break the eye contact.

It was our time to order, Ellie pulled up to the drive through speaker and told the person what we had wanted.

We pulled up to the window to pay and Ellie taken out her wallet and paid for our food. While waiting to pull up to the next window, Ellie glanced over at me, "Do you wanna watch a movie at my dorm while we eat?"

"Ooo i'm down for that, what movie did you have in mind?" Ellie pulled forward to the next window and got our food, handing it to me to hold while she drove us back to the dorm.

"I had a few in mind, but the horror one i wanted to wait till later tonight for us to watch. So the other options are Jurassic Park, SpaceBalls, or Jennifer's Body." Ellie spoke while focused on her driving.

"Isn't Jennifer's Body a horror movie?" I asked looking at Ellie puzzled. "Yeah, but it's mainly hot more than anything. Wouldn't you want to be eaten by Jennifer?" Ellie replied speaking matter-of-factly.

You know what, valid ass point.

"Let's watch Jennifer's body! it's been a hot minute since i've seen it anyways." I turned my attention to the window as Ellie drove us back to campus.

"Bet," Ellie agreed and the rest of the ride was an enjoyable silence between us. From the drive, to pulling into the parking lot, walking through campus, the ride in the elevator, and the walk down the hallway to Ellie's dorm.

Being around Ellie feels so peaceful now. Who knew how fast things have switched up. Especially how she's treating me now.

After Ellie unlocked her dorm door, she opened it and motioned for me to walk in first, her following behind me.

Seriously man, I can't believe this is the same person who was actively groaning and ignoring me not too long ago.

I set the food on the table in-front of the couch as we both sat down. " I am so hungry," Ellie said as she reached for the food, handing me my box then grabbing her own.

Ellie reached and grabbed the Tv remote off the table. She opened her movies app and searched up Jennifer's Body into the search bar. She pushed play as we started to eat our food.

The movie starts with Needy is sitting on her hospital bed, staring out the window. A pile of unopened mail scattered across her floor could be seen. Needy's voice came through the tv speakers. "Everyday, I get letters. I think I get more letters than Santa Claus, Zac Efron and Dr. Phil combined. I'm kind of the shit."

I'm positive this movie was my gay awakening.

Neither of us spoke while we ate devoured the food and watched the tv. I could feel my eyes glancing over at Ellie sitting next to me. I didn't realize how close we were, our thighs being against each other.

"Sometimes the letters are from people who say they're praying for me. They tell me everything will be okay if I just accept Jesus Christ into my heart. I say the words, but nothing ever happens. Nobody ever comes back. Nobody gets off the cross."

I felt Ellies body shift slightly closer to me, my heart skipping a beat. I allow myself to enjoy the closeness as i continued to eat my food.

Needy's voice continued to fill the silence, "Occasionally I get presents from starfuckers who saw my picture in the paper and want to marry me or something. They think they can take me away from this."

"Like I'd date some perverted Chester with a hard-on for jailbait. I might be insane, but I'm not desperate." Needy pulled on her uniform T-shirt.

"Alot of people ask if I'm sorry I did it" On the screen Needy picked up a paper cup and dumps the meds into her mouth.

"I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner." The movie showed Needy entering the gym. "Welcome to the Mental Olympics. They're big on recreation here. Supposedly it helps us vent our aggressions. We've traded in our hatchets for rackets, our Drain-o bombs for double Dutch. Even the cutters get in on the action when they're fully conscious."

The scene changes, showing Needy walking into the cafeteria. "Personally, I think they're trying to wear us out. Keep is sluggish so there won't be an uprising. Well, those J.V tactics won't work against me. I'm a kicker. K-I-C-K-E-R. It even says so on my chart."

Some lady with a clipboard approaches Needy and eyes are breakfast plate. "Just one Toastem, huh?" Needy quietly replies, "I like Toastems."

"That's good. But I'm not sure a Toastem can provide you with sufficient energy for you fay. I'd recommend more complex carbohydrates--" Needy interrupts her with a powerful kick to the face.

"I'd recommend that you shut the fuck up!" Needy yelled at her then spits in her face as chaos erupts inside the cafeteria.

Ellies voice caught my attention, "Man you know that shit had to hurt." As we watched the lady on the screen violently bleed, spitting out a tooth. I nodded my head agreeing, "mmhm."

Needy is then restrained by other staff members and hauled away to seclusion. "I wasn't always this cracked. I used to be normal-- well as normal as any girl under the influence of teenage hormones. But after the killings began, I started to feel, I don't know... loose around the edges or something. I was coming undone like those jeans I made in Home Ec. Falling to pieces like Patsy Cline. Shredded like moo-shu pork. Dead Inside."

Soft music began to play over the speakers in Needys solidarity.

'Through the trees, I will find you

Heal the ruins left inside you,

And the stars will remind you,

we'll meet again..'

Needys voice spoke over it, "I hate this fucking song." She then covers her ears, curling up into a a ball in the corner.

"I've always found that song to be so pretty," I said looking over at Ellie. "Maybe I'll learn to play it on the guitar for you someday." Ellie glanced over with a small smile on her face. We continued to eat our food, turning our attention back to the movie.

"This is where it all went down, 'Devils Kettle' sounds twisted, I know, but the place is just named after a dumb waterfall."

"Well technically, it's two waterfalls. One of them is normal-- it empties into river basin, But the other one goes into a hole. And it doesn't come out. The scientist guys can't explain it. They've dropped all kinds of things down there-- bouncy balls, red dye, radioactive slime-- but nothing ever surfaces."

Jennifer is then shown on the screen. Her features are gorgeous, but she looks sick and haggard. She picks at her skin while idly chewing on a limp lock of her hair.

Needys voice continues to speak, "Jennifer didn't always look this rough. Actually, she was like the prettiest girl in Devils Kettle when she wasn't so.. hungry."

As i was finishing my food, I noticed that Ellie was eating her last bite as well. She leaned back, getting more comfortable on the couch, laying out one of her arms on the back of the couch, behind me.

I stretched my arms up and relaxed into the couch, lightly laying against Ellies arm. "Aw shit, I'm sorry." Ellie spoke and began lifting her arm up and away from me. "It's okay, It didn't bother me. I actually kind of liked it." I smiled softly at her, a blush appearing on my face.

Chapter Text

Ellie and I were back in her room getting ready to smoke another bowl.

"If you were bit by a demon and it gave you powers, would you tell me?" I looked over at Ellie as she was packing the bowl. " For the fifth time, No, I wouldn't." She chuckled slightly while shaking her head slightly no.

"Well i'd tell you," i spoke to her matter of factly, crossing my arms over my chest. "You'd tell someone you barely know that you were bitten by a demon and it gave you powers?" She looked at me dumbfounded.

"I may only barely know you, but you are my soulmate. You know, the one i'm destined to be with," I shrugged my shoulders knowingly. "So, yeah, i'd tell you. Not just some rando though." Ellie was looking at me with a face i couldn't quite put a name to.

Amazed.? No, that's not it... hm.. Admiring? yeah that's a bit closer.. almost adoring.. I felt a jolt in my chest.

Ellie lit the bowl and began to exhale. Her eyelashes are so long and pretty. She was looking down, watching the weed burn in the bowl. okay, stop watching her like a creep, you weirdo.

I changed my view from Ellie to admire her art on the wall. It was drawings of different environments, to animals, and simple portraits of people. Every single more beautiful and breathtaking. She's so talented.

I felt the bed I was sitting on shift beside me. Ellie was closer beside me, bong in hand, and holding it out in front of me.

"Who's the guy in those drawings?" I asked while gently taking the bong from her hands. She looks at her art on the walls and back to me with a small, warm smile. "That's my dad."

I lit the bowl and breathed in the smoke, Looking back up at her wall while exhaling. "They're amazing Ellie." I turned my attention towards Ellie, our eyes meeting and what seemed like, time slowing down.

The feeling in the air shifted ever so slightly. What once was a mellow and comfortable environment, had turned into a stiff, nerve wracking energy.

Her red, droopy eyes drawing me in, as they move around, taking in what i'm guessing, is me. My attention moving down to her lips. They were slightly parted. Her breathing coming out soft and quiet, almost held back.

Looking back up to her eyes, which were now paying attention to my lips, then they lowered... all the way down to the floor. She glanced back behind hers self quickly, while scooting away and leaving a space between us and looking around her room.

I held the bong out in her direction, passing it off to her, "There's a bit left, if you wanna finish it."

'you're a loser baby, and loser god damn baby..-' My phone's ring tone began playing. The screen showed a photo and the name 'Dylan ^.^' across the top.

"Imma step out into the living room real quick and answer this." I smiled over at Ellie before standing up and clicking the green button on my screen. "Hello?" I walked outside of her bedroom, making my way across the small living room.

"Oh my god you're alive! I thought you were dead from how dry my phone has been." Dylan's playful, sarcastic tone of voice came through the phone.

My eyes practically rolled out of my head, "I've been here, what? Like 3 or 4 days? You missing me that much already?" I let myself laugh lightly replying to her.

Dylan and I have been friends for as long as I can remember. From having sleep overs almost every weekend, to talking about our first crushes (she was a bit shocked learning that I liked girls. dumb, conservative family bullshit, that she eventually got over). We went to concerts, snuck out, and tried weed together for the first time.

"OBVIOUSLY. You moved so fucking far away from me." She whined through the phone. "And you haven't updated me about anything."

"Yeah.. about that.. could I catch up with you later? i'm kinda in the middle of something at the moment." I could hear Dylan gasp on the other line.

"I KNOW THAT TONE, WHO ARE YOU WITH? HOW HOT ARE THEY? I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU ALREADY FLIRTING WITH SOMEONE! You have to send me a picture of them, I wanna know who you're crushing on. I can't believe you didn't even call or text me to tell me you have a new crush. First you don't tell me about your soulmate mark.." It was eerily quiet hearing Dylan abruptly stop talking so sudden.

"What about your mark..? Would it really be smart to go through another Alice situation? I mean, meaningless sex in the dark is different than actually dating someone." The concern in her voice could be heard clearly.

"That's the thing Dyl... Her words are on my body.."

Silence.

Followed by an extremely loud scream. A scream that paints the picture of a crazed fangirl seeing her celebrity crush.

I yanked the phone away from my ear, as the scream continued. I could hear her saying 'Oh my god, you have to tell me everything. I fucking knew you were with someone you liked but your fucking soulmate! Of all fucking people!' Her voice was deafeningly coming from the phone.

I put it back to my ear, "It was super unexpected honestly. We're currently spending the day together, completely alone, to try and get to know each other." I tried dropping the hint that I was wanting to get off the phone, so i could go back into Ellies room.

Suddenly the sound of a guitar being softly played could be heard. Dylan continued to keep asking me more questions, but the sound of her voice faded away. All I could hear was the gentle melody of the guitar.. Ellies guitar..

"Hey Dylan I gotta go.."

A subtle voice came through.. is that.?

"Talking Away

I don't know what I'm to say

I'll say it anyway

Today is another day to find you

Shying Away

I'll be coming for you love okay

Take on me"

My feet were moving before I could even register it. Holy shit.

"Take me on

I'll be gone

In a day or two"

I was now standing in her doorway, hypnotized. Her voice is so beautiful... and her playing is enchanting.

"Needless to say

I'm odd and ends but I'll

I'll be stumbling away

Slowly learning that life is okay

Say after me

It's no better to be safe than sorry"

An empty tone could be heard in her voice, mourning almost.

"Take on me

Take me on

I'll be gone

In a day or two"

She looked away from her guitar, making eye contact with me. She awkwardly went to set the guitar down, "Sorry If I was too loud..."

Before she could set it down fully, I spoke up "No.. keep playing.." I walked through her doorway and sat myself down on the floor. "It was beautiful.."

She gave a small smile, and place her guitar fully back into her lap, starting up the melody again.

"Things I say

Is it life or just to play my worries away?

All the things I've got to remember

You're shying away

I'll be coming for you anyway

Take on me

Take me on I'll be gone

In a day or two

In a day or two

Take on me"

Ellie let out a deep, soft sigh before letting her arms relax on the guitar. Her eyes moved to look at me. "Playing helps me feel at peace... it's comforting to me.." Her voice barely being above a whisper. Ellie's gazed returned back to her guitar.

"Play as much as you want, I didn't think it'd be this soon that I'd hear you play.. Let alone, sing." I spoke out in a comforting tone, letting my head tilt to the side slightly. With my phone still in my hand from the call, I snapped a quick photo of her lost in thought.

I want to remember this moment.

Ellie looks incredible from this angle. The guitar propped up on her leg as she sat on the chair. Her tattooed arm being draped over the guitar loosely. A smirk formed on her lips at my reply. She softly laughed to herself. "You caught me in a sappy mood, don't get used to it."

She stood up, placing the guitar back into the corner I had seen it in earlier.

"I'm sure i'll get to hear another song from you eventually." A small smile formed across my lips.

"If you're assuming that, then you don't know me." She looked at me with a challenging gleam in her eyes.

"Then let's play 20 questions and let me get to know you, that is the whole reason that i'm here, right??" My tone coming off as playful sarcasm.

Ellie rolled her eyes, "seriously?"

"yeah, now what's your favorite color?" You smiled brightly, tilting your head to the side.

"And you chose the most generic question to start with." She shook her head lightly, while letting out a sigh.

"Just answer the damn question dude." I spoke up before she could continue complaining.

"You know... It's changed recently.. I don't know the name of the color." Her eyes locked onto mine. "But it draws me in." I felt myself break eye contact, looking at the floor in front of me. "And I want to study it everyday."

The air in this room feels really heavy..

"It's tempted me since the day i've laid on it.. " Ellie took a step away from the guitar as she spoke. I looked back up at her hearing her take that first step. "Enticing me over.." and another, kneeling down onto the floor, directly in front of me.

Face to face.. Eyes scanning every feature. Our chest rising and falling with quiet, heavy breathes. Her eyes dropped down to my lips, then back up to my eyes, a devilish smile forming on her lips. She leaned in, closing in the space between us to mere centimeters.

"It's my turn to ask a question, right?" Her voice came out soft, barley above a whisper.

I nodded my head lightly, "yeah." The word almost getting caught in my throat.

She set her hands down on either side of my legs, leaning in closer to me. Her breathe could be felt on my ear, and neck. "would it fuck things up if i kissed you.?" I could smell the earthy, weed scent that lured me in. I could feel my eyes getting dopey.

Holy shit!! Holy shit! Okay, come on, get your shit together. I opened my mouth to answer. Nothing came out but a soft gasp. Ellie chuckled softly to herself.

A hand was now under my chin, turning my head gently to look towards what it wanted. My eyes met Ellies once again, but this time hers held something.

This type of look that makes me feel hunted. A predator who has caught their prey. The appetite they've longed for, for so long.

My head tilted up towards her all on its own. The fire in Ellies eyes ignited more.

The heaviness in my eyelids settled, closing them, as Ellie lean in. Her lips soft, teasingly grazing mine before fully leaning into them. The hand that was placed under my chin, slid its way up my jawline to behind my ear.

"Heeelllooooo... earth to y/n," Ellies hand was waving in front of my face. "Did you even hear my answer?" She stood back, tilting her head to the side.

I blinked my eyes a few times, looking at her a little dumbfounded "i think..? could you repeat it for me?" Ellie had walked past me and dropped onto her bed.

She shook her head, "Nope, should've been listening. Now it's my turn to ask a question." I watched as Ellie leaned back onto her elbows, thinking to herself.

"ohh I know." She looked at me with a mischievous gleam in her eye.

"What were you thinking of that made you zone out?"

"next question."

"uh uh, you wanted to play this game, there is no skipping. Tell me what was going on in that pretty mind of yours." Ellie sat up, and watched me with eagerness. "go on," she spoke with a small nod.

"i- i wasn't really thinking of anything... i just kind of..of... zoned out.. you know.?" My words came out a stumbling mess.

*ding*

Ellies phone went off.

She picked her phone up off the back reading the screen.

"Looks like you got saved," She turned her attention to me. "For now."