Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Part 1 - Chapter 2

Mahiru asked Hajime to deliver some food and reluctantly, he accepted. Surely it would count as murder if you let a participant starve to death, no? She seemed like she needed to attend to something, and rushed off. I hope she’s okay.
With a tray of milk and bread in hand, he cautiously stepped into the abandoned building, memories of Byakuya's body reeling through him.
He tried very hard to not think about that, the shock and disbelief of it all, a fellow classmate, two even, all of a sudden being gone: completely and utterly gone. But that didn't help anything. He could grieve when they figured out how to get off this island.

To the matter at hand, Nagito Komaeda had been tied up in the old building, apparently in the dining hall. To make him think about his crime? He thought, though he’s not sure Kazuichi and Nekomaru could think of something sly like that. They wanted to keep the rest of them safe, not make Nagito suffer, he hoped. Wishful thinking maybe, but why did he care? He drove Teruteru to murder, no matter how bad Nagito may feel, his actions needed to be dealt with, so Hajime couldn’t help but approve of their actions.

Hajime’s opinion changed however, when he finally walked through that door.

‘Hinata-kun! Oh I am so happy to see you, though I expected Koizumi-san. I am ever so grateful, having a girl feeding me was a little awkward. I must have scared her off with my disgusting aura, no? But yes Hinata-kun, I am so honoured you took time out of your day to see my disgraceful self!’

Jeez. He thought, starting to get used to Nagitos self-deprecation. After he showed his true colours in the class trial - he did expect this to continue, but to this degree? He would say no one deserved that if not for what Nagito had attempted to do just a few days ago.

‘Anyway Hinata-kun, I have quite an important request, if only important to me,’ he chuckled wryly - ‘but I did not want to ask koizumi-san as that would be rude, however, it seems I have no choice now. Oh, how grateful I am to even have the opportunity to ask someone as great as yo-’

‘I’m not in the mood Nagito, what is it? Just spit it out’ There was only so much of Nagito he could handle at once.

‘Forgive me for being blunt, but I am in desperate need of untying, see. I have been like this for a couple of days now, and, well -’ he spurts, faster now, seemingly more desperate to get it out, as Hajime notices a bead of sweat starting to form. ‘I need to… go.’

Go?? What on earth is he trying to say to convince me to untie him from the shackles? He needs to… Go? Oh? Oh.

I can't keep the shock from showing in a small embarrassing hum as he realises. Oh god, that's why he was so glad it wasn't Mahiru that showed up, oh god. He realised now that it was probably obvious. Nagito was sweating profusely, his whole body twitching and squirming, his soft lips parted as if he couldn't breathe at all, eyes red with tears of frustration, cheeks flushed with a scarlet after saying the words. He was breathing so heavily, he could hear its raspy desperation as Hajime watched his chest repulse up and down, and he felt a sudden rush of emotion. An.. arousal. His dick twitched and he started to panic. Now? Seriously? At this? He felt the blood that wasn't rushing downward rush to his cheeks, as he prayed Nagito wouldn't notice. But he couldn't help it. The sheer desperation in his wheezing and the look of want in his greyish green eyes, was doing something to Hajime’s body that hasn't happened since he found himself on this island. Stop it! Now is not the time!

In an attempt to stop Nagito from noticing the rising tent in his jeans, Hajime moved closer to him, putting the tray down as he went.

‘O-okay. What can I do? I shouldn't untie you without permission from the others, but if i go and explain im sure theyll-’

‘No! N-no, please H-hinata-kun’ Hajime’s dick started to throb as his begging was making his raspy cries sound almost erotic. ‘I-I can't hold it for much longer, it's okay just, just maybe if you wouldn't mind, helping me with my clothes?’ His face lit up pink at the words. This must be so awful for him, so embarrassing and that fact made hajime even more aroused. He shouldn't, not like this, but he just simply couldn't resist, not anymore.
Hajime helped Nagito stand up and they walked to a corner of the room, the chain and rope being quite long.

‘Are you sure this is okay Nagito?’

‘Yes! Please just- please’ he whined. Fuck.

Hajime unzipped Nagito’s jeans, and gently, slowly, pulled his dick out.

‘Do you need me to.. Um.. hold it or something? Actually, nevermind. I'll just.. I’ll just do it,’ Hajime whispered softly, not caring about any of his past actions in the moment, only hoping he could spare Nagito the shame of asking Hajime to hold his dick.
He averted his eyes and Nagito… went. He tried not to listen, but did find himself looking at Nagito’s face. He was sweating profusely now, cheeks scarlet, utterly ashamed but also relieved, white eyelashes fluttering and letting out a long, strained, groan. Hajime was in too deep now. This was too much for him. He felt so guilty, but the guilt made it sexier.

As Nagito finished, they didn't move. Nagito's hands still tied up on his chest, gripping so tightly his palms might start bleeding. Hajime's hand is still on Nagito’s dick, not finding it in himself to let go. He knew it was wrong, so, so wrong but he was frozen in the moment, both of them heaving and wheezing, Hajime’s cock harder than ever. Then he realised something. His hips were touching Nagito's waist. If he moved, even an inch, Nagito would feel his arousal. But it was too late.
‘Hinata-kun, you're..’ he trailed off, his eyes darting down and Hajime followed his gaze, realising where he'd landed. His cheeks flushed more, if that was even possible, the blush spreading to the tips of his ears.

‘I-I’m sorry. That's not right, I'm so-’ Hajime tried to pull away, before realising Nagito had grown hard too. Fuck. What do I do now?

‘Its okay H-Hinata-kun. I-I understand. But if you need me, then… I suppose that would be… okay…’ Nagito whispered. Those words were wrong, they both knew it, but they couldn't deny the need anymore, the attraction.

They both said nothing else, as Hajime's hand started to move. He stroked, softly and gently. He couldn't believe that his fantasy - although a very very new one, was coming true. He wanted to ask again if it was okay, if he was allowed, if he was a monster for finding this attractive - moreso to himself than Nagito - but he got lost in the pleasure of Nagito's small breaths, small grunts, small pleas for more. They were silent, with nothing but the faint creaks on the floorboards to accompany their moans and heavy panting. They both grew harder, as Hajimes dick twitched for attention more than he could handle. He found his hand groping at his zipper- desperate.

‘Nagito, can I-’
‘Yes.’ he pleaded, understanding completely.

Hajime let his dick fall out and Nagito almost chuckled at just how unfathomably aroused he had made this boy. So he tended to himself with one hand and Nagito with the other, their escaped breaths almost in sync. They both didn't say anything, as if they might be heard, as if they made the slightest noise they might ruin everything, so they stayed silent as possible, muffling their moans to stay like this for as long as they could. As Hajime thought of his desperation, the way he looked tied up on the floor, he just had to go faster, and found he was going faster to both of them, their precum dripping out all over both of Hajimes hands, slathered on every knuckle. Nagito lifted his still restrained hands to cover his mouth, trying to restrict any escaping moans. F-fuck, he’s…

‘Hinata-kun, I’m-’

‘Me too’ He groaned. Hajime went as fast as he could, hoping to please the boy, hoping he could make him groan again, hoping he could find out where his limits lie. He imagined Nagito tied up, but no more clothes, still so desperate, needing his attention. And just like that, it was over for the both of them, cum dripping down Nagito's jeans and onto the floor. Hajime milked it a little while longer, letting it all come out, every drop, knowing that he had pleased them both enough for what felt like gallons, he smiled.

As they both tried to catch their breath, Hajime zipped up both their trousers and tried to clean up as much of his mess as possible with some tissues that were left from a few nights ago. They were both panting and sweating beads as they sat down, letting the relief wash over them. That was so… good. But Hajime finally realised what he had done. The full extent of his sins became clear.

I jerked off Nagito. After I watched him piss. After he just tried to kill someone. I masterbated to him pissing. I came on his leg. He felt he had never done something so disgusting, so, so- well- gross. He felt so guilty, so much he ended up blurting out his thoughts.

‘Fuck. What have I done?’
Nagito looked up, as if he had just remembered Hajime was there, snapping out of his pleasurable thoughts, and looked equally as guilty.

‘Oh, Hinata-kun I’m so sorry that you had to touch someone as disgusting as myself! I should have much more self control and I am grateful you managed to hide your hatred of me. I must have tricked you in some way if you were willing to do… that for me. You must be so disappointed.

‘No! Nagito - fuck. It's not your fault. It's- I don’t know what came over me. Just - don't blame yourself but… can we not speak of um… that again.’ The colour had returned to his cheeks.

‘Of course Hinata-kun. You must feel very ashamed that you had a lapse in judgement and decide to please myself of all people! But I understand. I will not mention this to anyone.’

‘It wasnt a lapse in- fuck, whatever just… thank you. And, I'm sorry…’

Before Nagito had the chance to protest, Hajime ran- no, sprinted out of the room. What the fuck have I done.

Chapter Text

Part 2 - Chapter 2

Mahiru Koizumi was found dead. Peko Pekoyama was guilty, because she thought that's what Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu had wanted. As she was executed, Fuyuhiko had almost died too, and now he was AWOL.

The stress of the evening had died down a bit, now that Hajime was back in his cottage. Two more classmates had died, and one was gravely injured, possibly dead. He prayed to himself it would never happen again. But there was something else on his mind. Something, surprisingly, affecting him slightly more than murder. There was an undeniable rush of pure guilt. Nothing as bad as murder, of course, though it felt like it to Hajime. He was left with the overwhelming pain of embarrassment.

They hadn’t talked, not really, since what happened in the abandoned building. So he found himself thinking of Nagito again, although trying not to think too hard about the events, so as to not accidentally excite himself.

To Hajime, at first Nagito seemed like a chill guy. Hyping him up, being kind and helping him feel adjusted to the island. Nagito Komaeda, before he showed his true colours, before his raspy, loud laughter, before that crazed look in his eyes, Hajime thought they were friends. Thinking back on his actions, they were definitely very bad. Maybe it was the way he had treated him before, or the way he looked when his hand was on his… Anyway, he knew that persona he put on, of some crazy psycho yearning for hope, was just that: a persona. He knew from the kind, soft way he treated Hajime when he was vulnerable, and the way he believed in him, that was real. That Nagito, he missed. He had an aching feeling that that Nagito went away because of Nagito’s self loathing. And Hajime knew when he called himself disgusting, or filth, Nagito meant every word.

That just didn’t sit right with him. So he made up his mind. Hajime was going to convince him to get everyone to forgive him, so everyone could get along, and so that Nagito, who he found to be kind of endearing… he could get to see again. Maybe my talent is the Ultimate Mediator. Hajime thought, chuckling to himself. But he would have to see how it went with Nagito before he dreamed of earning a title like that.

Hajime stepped out of his cottage, and it was already nighttime, the air heavy with the events of the night- thinking of the execution. Hajime pushed those thoughts away. He hoped he wouldn't be stopped by Chiaki again so he would have to lie, like the night he played Twilight Syndrome Murder Case. He pushed those thoughts away too, for now. He identified Nagito’s cottage with a nameplate and a childish drawing of his face, unruly hair and all. Hajime was amused at the likeness, but remembered Monokuma was probably behind this, and decided he should try not to appreciate it at all.

Hajime stepped into the doorway, and knocked softly, so as to not wake anyone. He heard rustling, then footsteps, then the door opening for Hajime to behold a shirtless Nagito. He was wearing baggy dark grey sweatpants, probably from the supermarket, and he couldn't help but admit he looked very good in them. He then found his gaze drift to his bare chest, and erect nipples from the sudden cool breeze - Hajime found himself erect too. Seriously.

That easy? His face flushed red, with the remaining blood flow that wasn’t heading downward, but his thoughts were interrupted.

‘Is this about-’

‘N-no of course not!’ Hajime flustered, cheeks growing redder still. ‘I just wanted to talk to you about something, if that's okay?’

‘Of course! Hinata-kun is welcome!’ Hajime thought he saw a flash of disappointment in his voice. Must be his imagination. Maybe. ‘Though, you may find yourself disgusted by my presence and scent. I apologise, but I am very honoured you requested time with filth like myself!’ Nagito beamed, always seemingly the happiest when talking down to himself. Hajime’s brow furrowed, frowning, but stepped in anyway. He tried his best to avert his eyes from Nagito’s bare chest, just to keep his excitement down.

‘So what can I do for you, Hinata-kun?’ He beamed, closing the door and beckoning Hajime to sit beside him on the bed. Hajime obliged. ‘If you need me for anything, if it means expanding your own hope, I would even be willing to clean your shoes with just my tongue!’

‘Well that's what it's about actually…’

‘Ah! Of course, shall I start with the left or right?’ Nagito said, getting on his knees and leaning down.
‘No, Nagito not that! Of course not that.’ Hajime was stunned, but continued. ‘I mean the way you speak about yourself and also, how you should get the others to forgive you.’ Hajime explained. Nagito’s eyes widened, and his mouth opened as if to say something, but he was bent down in front of Hajime, so he didn't get the chance.

‘P-please sit up first…’ Hajime flushed, again, very much struggling to keep his excitement down from earlier now. Nagito obliged, not seeming to understand why Hajime was flustered, and he was thankful. Get your mind out of the gutter already!

‘A-anyway, I think that finding forgiveness from the others will help. Hiyoko could use the extra support, and Mikan could use some praise, and well, I think you deserve that forgiveness! Your actions were not good, no- but they came from good intentions and I think that you could convince them, because we all need another friend. And frankly, you could be a good friend… if you stop calling yourself filth…’ Hajime mumbled that last part. He knew it was a stretch. As Nagito looked in disbelief, wide-eyed, he started to panic. What am I thinking, asking so much of him? I have no right, and just because I want to see his smile and be closer to him again doesnt give me the right, I'm being selfish. But.. but maybe I should be selfish, because if it makes him smile again… then maybe it's worth it. He liked Nagito’s smile, so wide it closed his eyes. He blushed at the thought. But when he realised Nagito wasn’t saying anything, he became embarrassed, and got up to leave. What needed to be said was said, after all. Not well, Hajime wasn’t good with words, but he hoped he understood.

‘W-wait Hinata-kun’ Nagito suddenly cried out, grabbing his hand, pulling him back down. Hajime was a little flushed, now closer to Nagito than ever, but he sat and listened anyway.

‘I understand, I have been a nuisance again. I should have seen this coming, but the pathetic filth I am, of course not! If Hinata-kun so pleases, I will never speak of myself again and do my best to be a stepping stone for hope. If that's what you wish.’ Nagito beamed, happy with himself.

But Hajime was not happy. He was angry, and tried not to show it, but couldn’t help himself.
‘No- fuck… Nagito no! Not for me or anyone else. I want you to want to be forgiven because I know you're worthy, I just know it! And hearing you call yourself disgusting, and filth- youre beautiful, so that hurts the most!’ Hajime yelled. Shit. He hadn’t meant to say any of that.

His face flushed pink again, but he didnt move. Now that it was out there, he was curious what Nagito thought. All he could see was disbelief, and that didn’t sit right with him at all. He truly did not believe his words, so he would just have to show him. His mind was made up, now. He couldn’t bear to think that Nagito didn’t realise how beautiful he was. So Hajime leaned slightly forward, and grabbed Nagito’s hand. Hajime searched for any fear or discomfort in his eyes, but he found none, just shock and disbelief, so once again, Hajime couldn’t have that. Hajime was no good with words, so he would show him how beautiful and deserving he was. So with no regrets or hesitation, he leaned forward and let his lips interlock with the shocked boy in front of him. He let himself get a taste for a moment, holding the position, letting himself enjoy it, as Nagito may pull away any second, but he didn’t. Nagito pushed himself into Hajime, letting the kiss run deeper, showing him it was okay. That he wanted it too.

Hajime didn’t dare pull away. The kisses grew hungrier, deeper, and it wasn’t enough. Nagito licked Hajime's lips, and let his tongue slide through his mouth. Hajime let a moan escape him, feeling his cheeks flush in the process, and he felt Nagito smile against the kiss. So Hajime got him back, remembering he was still bare-chested, stroking his chest to find a sensitive spot. And that he found, his fingers landing on Nagito’s nipples, he bit down onto Hajime’s lip, trying to suppress a moan, and he smiled onto the kiss in turn, feeling accomplished. He kept stroking them though, Nagito letting out a sickly sweet wince, which told him it's not enough.

Like their bodies were communicating in a language only they understood, Hajime did exactly what he was “told”, pulling away from the kiss. Nagito let an admittedly cute whine, disappointed, but not for long as Hajime started playing with his nipples on his tongue, caressing and massaging them.

‘aAh- H-hajimee…’ Nagito groaned, straining the words in such a way that sounded unbelievably erotic, especially with the use of his given name. It made it private, this was a feeling shared only by him and Nagito, Hajime thought to himself, grinning. But it still wasn’t enough, he wasn't quenching that thirst, that need, that desire for each other. He lowered his hips and let the tents in their trousers touch, as Hajime gently grinded on top of him.

‘H-hajime.. aah..mmfh..’ Fuck, he's hot. Hajime thought, as if realising it for the first time.
His rhythm did not let up, as he moved, he started sucking and biting softly under Nagito’s sharp jaw. The moaning didnt stop, would not stop, and Hajime felt accomplished. He moved his lips to his ear, whispering: ‘Do you get it yet, what you deserve?’ he purred softly, nibbling his ear as he did, but never letting up on his grinding, keeping a rhythm.

‘Ah, h-Ah-hajime-kun…’ Nagito let out with strain, happy with the praise as he was being worked down. Hajime hoped- if a bit selfishly- that he would exhaust him. He had accomplished his goal, he thought, to make Nagito feel appreciated. But he wasn’t going to stop now.

‘h-Ah-haji-AH-me…’ Nagito managed to get out in between thrusts. ‘M-more..’ His slender fingers sliding down Hajime’s chest, looking for skin. So Hajime obliged, and as he sat up, he tried to make a show of taking his shirt off, doing it slowly and dramatically, throwing his shirt on the floor with as much aggression as a raging bull. Nagito enjoyed the show, it seemed. But he looked up at Hajime, with that same desperation and begging in his eyes as before, in the abandoned hall, and Hajime wanted to make him feel that relief again.

‘P-please hajime…’ he whimpered, beckoning to his sweatpants. So Hajime unzipped and slipped off his jeans, and let Nagito do the same. The sight of them both in their boxer shorts, where their tips would be, a stain of where any precum had slipped out, and the sight was too much for both of them - they wasted no time slipping their boxers off too.
As both their dicks sprung out, unfathomably erect, Hajime leaned down once again to take Nagito’s lips in his own. He pushed into this kiss, letting it run as deeply as he could fathom, and letting their bare cocks brush against each other again, ever so gently, he asked again: ‘Do you understand how much you deserve?’

‘Y-yes…’

‘What was that?’ Hajime teased, rubbing Nagito’s nipples again as if to see how long he could go without yelling. Not long.

‘Y-YEs, Hajime… yes…’ He whined, clearly on the edge, and Hajime was enjoying every second.
Hajime sat up a bit and realised that Nagito’s legs had spread, wide, asshole twitching, begging for his cock, for Hajime. He let his cock circle the rim, teasing him again.

‘Ah.. mfhh Hajime, please!’ Nagito couldn't handle it anymore.
But Hajime realised something: ‘Fuck- wait, we don’t have any…um…lube.’ Hajime admitted, almost ashamed to say a naughty word. Cute. Nagito thought.
‘You’ve- you’ve done too much to me Hajime, i don't know how much longer i can take’, Nagito admitted in turn, sheepishly, flushing a deep scarlet. Hajime enjoyed seeing that but Nagito was right, he couldn’t handle it either. Not anymore.
‘I’m sure the supermarket has it, I'm sure that maybe… we could do it there, I mean no one will be there and then… um… we wouldn't have to come all the way back as well…’ Hajime asked, quite embarrassed he would go to that length to not wait too long to be inside Nagito, but it seemed he wasn't the only one to share the sentiment.
Nagito nodded, vigorously, and Hajime chuckled, enjoying his desperation.

They were really going to have sex on the cold floor of the supermarket, just because they needed each other, just because they had an urge for each other. Hajime became more excited than ever, looking forward to something so mischievous, so…naughty.

And then suddenly, there came an unfortunate appearance. Very unfortunate. The biggest, most awful, most tragic, appearance in human history.
‘Puhuhu, I can't allow that! I wouldn't be a very good teacher!’
‘You're already being an awful teacher, ruining their special moment, see! - aAh!’
Monokuma laughed, Monomi squealed, and the two boys screamed all the air out of their lungs.

‘W-what the fuck!’ Hajime yelled, pulling a blanket over the top of both of them, not sure if he should be embarrassed by a mechanical bear seeing him naked.
‘Hajime- um.. Hinata-kun, you shouldn’t yell, someone might hear.’ Nagito squirmed, very embarrassed. (Mechanical bear or not)

‘Puhuhu, these cottages are soundproof, you can be as frisky as you want!’ Monokuma started to huff and sweat. The boys frowned, unexplainably flaccid.
‘But I can't have you being freaky in the streets, that wouldn't be family friendly and then I can't market to the kids!’ Monokuma’s nonsense was lost on them. ‘Ah, but don't be embarrassed, I wasn’t watching, promise! Maybe a small peek..’ Hajime and Nagito both winced, completely horrified. ‘Anyway, I'm afraid you'll be raw dogging it tonight! Puhuhuhu!’

Before Monokuma could hear Hajime seethe with rage, Monokuma and Monomi had already gone. Hajime wanted to scream, mortified. Before he could say anything, he heard his student handbook make a noise, so he picked it up off the floor, rolling onto his back beside Nagito so he could read.

Rule #9: No penetration, anal, foreplay or sex of any kind outside one of the participating parties designated cottages.

‘Oh my…’ Nagito let out, finally, as they had both been sitting there in shock for what felt like days.
Then Hajime erupted with laughter, and Nagito couldn't help but follow suit.
‘Why did he have to say it like… that. That's just so… ugh…’ Hajime finished, sighing, letting the laughter fall. Nagito smiled. He liked Hajime’s laugh, so full and bright.
‘Oh god, I bet everyone got a notification, there's going to be so many questions tomorrow.’

Nagito suddenly looked nervous. ‘People might be searching for the culprits, so if anyone were to spot you now, it would be obvious…’ Nagito turned to him, hand on his chest, circling it nervously.

Hajime understood what he was implying, and felt some colour rush to his cheeks.

‘I guess I had better stay. Right?’ Hajime asked nervously, waiting for approval, trying not to sound desperate.

‘Yes, that's right.’ Nagito concluded, feeling happy with himself, though he wouldn't quite admit it.

They lay there for a moment, letting the heavy smell of sex engulf them.
‘Monokuma kind of killed- well- slaughtered the mood…’ Hajime nervously admitted, like he was embarrassed to remind himself they were just about to have sex. ‘So we should probably…postpone.’

‘P-postpone?!’ Nagito cried, flustered. Hajime laughed, glad Nagito wasn’t exactly disagreeing. He let himself giggle for a minute, and pulled Nagito onto his chest. Nagito gulped, like Hajime was making a mistake, and any word he spoke would make him realise and redact it.
‘Hajime…I-’
‘Nagito… if whatever you're about to say is negative, or god forbid an apology, I'll have you know I did that because I wanted to, and because I wanted you to enjoy yourself, that's all.’
Nagito was too shocked at his accuracy to protest, so he held his tongue, and just tried to enjoy himself, letting his weight fall onto Hajime’s chest. Hajime understood, and just stroked his head of messy white hair. Nagito let out a soft purr; they were both beaming.

…

As Nagito felt the caressing stop, he realised Hajime had fallen asleep. Hajime’s the pretty one… he concluded. He contemplated for a moment, thinking back on the night and Hajime’s words, then decided it was okay if he fell asleep here, cuddled up to this handsome boy that seemed to care about him so much, despite not feeling he deserved it. Apologies… I can do that, I suppose. Nagito decided, as he also drifted off to sleep, smiling genuinely for the first time in a while.

…

Chapter Text

Part 3 - Chapter 3

‘Hinata-kun, wake up!’ Nagito was in panic mode. The Monokuma announcement hadn’t gone off yet, but he knew when it did, everyone would leave their cottages. If someone saw Hajime leave Nagito’s cottage, then…

‘Quickly, you must leave! Otherwise someone will see you!’

Hajime, groggy, not happy that his bliss was interrupted, sighed.
‘Alright, alright. Give me a second’ he yawned. Both boys were still naked, under the covers, the intimacy not lost on them - but they had more important matters to attend to.
Nagito handed him his discarded boxers, still stained with precum, and flushed.
‘H-here Hinata-kun…’ He refused to make eye-contact, afraid he would lose control again.
Hajime noticed the stain too, and flushed red in turn.
‘Ah… thank you.’ As he got up to get dressed, Nagito found himself missing the warmth of the boy’s bare skin on his own.
‘I…uh… better go..’ Hajime sighed sadly. Sadly? Nagito pondered. As he slipped on his shoes and turned to leave, something came over him. He rushed back, giving Nagito a quick peck on the cheek.
‘A-ah… Hajime?’
‘I’ll um… see you later?’ he shot Nagito with a soft smile.
As Hajime rushed out, sprinting to his cottage (no one was awake yet, thank god.), he let his door slam shut and leaned against it. His face was a deep red, so thick you couldn't even make out his light freckles anymore, and he smiled again, wider than ever. Little did he know, Nagito was doing the exact same thing.

…

‘Uh… what the hell is that?’ Hajime was startled… he and Hiyoko were the only ones in the restaurant so far. He had come as soon as the Monokuma announcement had started, to avoid any suspicion, but there was an ominous display of photos in the corner. They were letting out this ghoulish aura… it was unexplainable why this had shown up, out of the blue…

‘I think it's a tribute to Mahiru… whoever did this did such a good job! They must have really cared about her!’ Hiyoko laughed, very clearly the one behind it.
‘Ah yes… it's um… beautiful…’ Hajime strained, but it was obviously important to Hiyoko, so he kept his mouth shut. She smiled widely, clearly happy with herself.
As Hajime started on his breakfast, a crowd of people started to walk in.
‘W-what the hell is that?!’
‘This hellish creation…’
‘Oh! That is so “not cool”!’
‘Exactly Miss Sonia! Right as always!’
‘Who cares about that? Didja see that new rule in your pad thingies?’ Akane finished, mouth already full of her breakfast.
‘W-wait, what about the tribute…’ Hiyoko squealed, bursting into tears. But that topic was not of interest to Hajime’s classmates- not in comparison to this. Hiyoko cried, dejected, but accepted that no one cared about her “tribute” anymore. Not happily, anyway.
‘Ah! It wasn’t m-m-me!’ Mikan squealed, clearly embarrassed, even though no one asked her- as always.
Hiyoko muttered: ‘Well she wasn’t my first guess…’ Luckily, no one heard.

‘Wait, what about this… um… lovely tribute. It is so… hopeful! We must appreciate it, though it makes even myself squirm,’ Nagito added, blushing, clearly wanting to change the subject. Hajime shot a smile at Nagito, thankful. Please change the subject… it’s only a matter of time before-

‘Halt, comrades. I believe that to be a mark of passion on the crazed one’s nape,’ Gundham exclaimed, pointing to Nagito’s neck. Everyone’s eyes darted to where he was pointing, and there was an eruption of squeals and screams. There was a hickey on Nagito’s jaw, that's what he meant. Shit, I’m screwed. Hajime thought to himself.
‘N-no Tanaka-san, it is just a bruise. Clumsy me!’ Nagito tried to explain, putting his hands up in protest.
‘No way, that's totally a love bite’ Hiyoko giggled, clearly not caring about the tribute anymore.
‘Yup.’ Akane added, still stuffing her face. Sonia solemnly nodded, apparently well versed on the subject.
‘No way, nice one bro!’ Nekomaru shouted, a bit too excited. ‘Who’s the lucky girl?’

‘Or guy… c'mon guys.’ Hajime added without thinking, realising he had dug himself a larger hole. Nagito tried not to glare at him.
‘Yup. Bastard seems like the type.’ Fuyuhiko added. Wait, Fuyuhiko?
‘Fuyuhiko! Y-you're okay!’ Mikan exclaimed.
‘Oh Fuyuhiko, we are relieved to see you healthy.’ Sonia smiled.

Everyone greeted Fuyuhiko, happily. It was a miracle really. Everyone’s mind was put off from the mystery, in respect for the injured boy. He seemed okay, Hajime thought, and thanked him silently for changing the subject. Fuyuhiko ended up apologising for his behaviour, and of course everyone obliged, just happy that there were no more casualties to grieve, though Hiyoko seemed to be a bit hesitant, Hajime noted. Fuyuhiko had come back to them, and everyone was so grateful. Hajime had held out hope, and was glad to see it pay off, though he was left with an unfortunate eyepatch. Well, it's better than Peko’s fate… Hajime concluded, glad there was some happiness left to find on this hell of an island.

…

‘On the subject of apologies, I was hoping to add my own.’ Nagito spoke up. Everyone looked at him, shocked.
‘Wait, really? Are you serious dude?’ Kazuichi chuckled- in disbelief.
‘No way- not for the apparent sex freak.’ Hiyoko added, snickering.
‘H-hiyoko… m-maybe we should hear him out.’ Mikan mumbled
‘Shut up you fat ugly pig!’
‘Okay…’
‘No, wait. Mikan’s right, let's just listen.’ Hajime found himself trying to mediate, again.

As Nagito attempted to apologise, in his own way, rambling about his disgusting self and not actually explaining why he was sorry, everyone rolled their eyes and started to move on. As Nagito fumbled with his words, he looked to Hajime for support. Hajime knew how hard this must be for him, and gave him a soft smile. You can do this, he thought. Nagito nodded.

‘What I mean to say is… I am sorry about my attitude towards you all. And I hope you can forgive my actions, though I do not expect you to. I was…wrong about Hanamura-san, and I was wrong about you all… I’m… sorry.’ As everyone looked back in shock at the lack of self-deprecation, his classmates seemed to finally understand his sincerity.
It was as if all his actions were done out of ignorance, though that was debatable whether it was true, everyone seemed to realise that possibility.
‘That took balls. I say we forgive him, bastard he is. No use pissing each other off this whole time…’ Fuyuhiko concluded. ‘You don’t have to agree with me, but… he seems like he means it.’

‘I-it would be preferable if we did-did not fight…’ Mikan stumbled, smiling at the avoided conflict. Hajime supposed being the Ultimate Yakuza had a hand in Fuyuhiko’s negotiation
skills, because it seemed to work. Maybe it was because of the out-of-character sincerity, or everyone was feeling soft due to Fuyuhiko’s survival, but most of his classmates seemed willing to forgive and forget. Most.

‘No way, not the sex freak!’ Is that his name now? Luckily, Hiyoko’s not a trendsetter.
‘Yeah no way, I ain’t forgetting what an asshole he was.’
‘But Kazuichi, he really does seem sorry…’
‘You’re right Miss Sonia!’ He turned to Nagito, ‘No worries, dude.’
Sonia’s influence has no bounds, it seems.

Nagito was beaming, with that childish grin Hajime enjoyed to see. He was glad his support was working, maybe leading to a real friendship between everyone on the island. As long as nothing more happened, there was no more need to doubt each other. No more enemies, no more conflict. And please, please, no more murder.

…

The end of a new class trial meant that a new island had opened up. Monomi had informed them, bloody with the scars of battle, that she had defeated another monobeast. Before she left the restaurant, she gave Nagito and Hajime a thumbs up, as if to say good luck in any future… endeavours….! Both boys blushed, understanding perfectly. They were happy for the support, I suppose. But it's not like they were in a relationship or anything, right? Still, it was nice of her to keep their secret.

As they explored the island, they looked for clues, as always. They found none, as always. There was a movie theatre, motel, hospital, and music venue on the new island but nothing of much interest. As Hajime investigated, he found himself in the movie theatre, and saw Nagito. They hadn’t been alone since this morning, in bed, intimately. As they locked eyes, colour flushed to their cheeks.

‘Hey.’
‘Hello, Haj- Hinata-kun.’ Crap, I don’t know what to say to him at all. There's a certain rush of emotion you get when the last time you saw someone was in an intimate position. It's such a stark contrast, from the vulnerable state Nagito was in when he was under him, to now, standing politely and composed- fully dressed. Do we have a relationship? Am I supposed to call him my…? No, it was a one time thing, surely. Hajime pondered, ignoring his own “postpone” comment.

‘W-what you up to here?’ Hajime finally managed to get a word out, as he was standing there staring stupidly for who knows how long.

‘Oh, I was just about to see this movie. It looks awful, but I thought it may be a clue.’
It really does look awful. But to watch a movie with Nagito? With a lot less hesitation than he probably should have, he made up his mind, not wasting this chance.

‘Lets watch it, Nagito.’ He felt like he had just saved a LOT of money, somehow.

‘I’d be honoured, Hinata-kun.’ Nagito obviously didn't seem to realise the implications of watching a movie, alone, with someone you had just had… relations with, considering Hajime's face was ten times darker than Nagito’s in a flush of scarlet. But Hajime was grateful: It’s not like it's a date. He doesn't think it's a date. I don't like him or anything, it was just a one time thing. Just a one time thing. Just seeing a movie with a friend, nothing I haven’t done before. Then why was he so nervous?

‘I’ve never been to the theatre with anyone, Hinata-kun. I’m honoured my first time can be with you!’
Hajime flushed an even deeper red.
‘F-first time? Oh, right… wait, really?’ I’m so glad he’s oblivious.
‘Yes, I have never watched a movie with a friend. I… I can call you that, yes?’
‘Of course we’re friends! Now come on, let's get snacks.’ Hajime smiled brightly, and Nagito’s heart almost skipped a beat. He had never had a friend before. He was glad it was Hajime. I’m not sure, but I suppose what we did last night is something that friends can do…? Hajime was beaming, suddenly excited at the smell of popcorn, and Nagito gladly followed, smiling in turn. It doesn't matter. This is nice, regardless. I shall enjoy it while it lasts.

…

The movie really was terrible. But neither were paying attention.

According to Monokuma, the tickets were handed out exclusively by him, so there was no other way to get in except through Monokuma. That meant that once a showing started, the doors locked until he decided to sell more tickets. So Hajime and Nagito were alone in the theatre. As soon as they sat down, they became nervous. Well, mostly Hajime.

‘A-are you excited?’ Hajime spluttered, palms sweating profusely. The dim lighting of the theatre reflected on Nagito’s white hair, creating an almost halo like effect. He looked absolutely gorgeous, and Hajime noticed. It was really throwing him off.
‘Not really, but I am hoping it shall be helpful.’
‘Yeah, it really looked awful, huh?’
Hajime turned to lock eyes with Nagito. He stared back. This lighting is really doing him favours. He looks as handsome as ever. Would it be okay to tell him that? Nagito thought to himself. Their eyes continued to be locked, for what seemed like hours. As the movie started, they didn't look away. Hajime nervously slid his hand against Nagito’s, deciding to just muster up the courage to make a move.
‘You look good today.’
‘S-so do you, Hinata-kun.’
They were not watching this movie.

Before they knew it, their lips were interlocked again, one hand squeezed with the other as Nagito caressed Hajime’s cheek. He leaned forward, pushing an armrest up to get Hajime under him. As they let eachother get a taste, they got completely lost in the bliss. Kissing Hajime was so, nice. Kissing Nagito was so… good. They didn’t care about the movie. They didn't care about anything except each other's enjoyment. They each wanted to show each other a good time, and because of last night's unfortunate interruptions, it was long overdue.

‘Wait, Hinata-kun… The rule…’ Shit.
Ah, that's right. The new rule that was added to the student handbook stated that you couldn't get… well… “frisky” anywhere except your cottage.
Hajime frowned, disappointed he had to deal with further interruption.
‘It doesn't say anything about making out…’ he teased, leaning back up into Nagito. But he placed a finger on Hajime’s lips, softly pushing him back down onto the seat. Hajime frowned once more.
‘But, what if Monokuma counts this as… f-foreplay…?’
‘Ah…’ Hajime blushed. But he was right, if they broke the rules, they would be executed, and as unfortunate as it was, this risk wasn't worth dying over. Plus, he didn't really want to call Monokuma over to ask, or for him to do anything for that matter.
‘You’re right, I guess…’ Hajime concluded, clearly disappointed. Nagito chuckled.
‘Shall we… postpone?’ he teased.
‘Hey! Don’t look so proud of yourself…’ Hajime mumbled, flushed, but smiling all the same.

As they sat up, they turned their attention to the movie. It seemed to be almost over, even though it couldn't have been more than ten minutes. But as they watched, they kept their hands together. Hajime squeezed, and Nagito squeezed back. It didn't matter what they did, as long as they had each other's company, they couldn't help but smile.

‘Well that was god-awful.’ Hajime sighed, walking out of the theatre.
‘I’m glad we were only allowed to watch that once, that is an experience filthier than even me…’ Nagito added.
Despite how terrible the movie was, they concluded that they each had a good time, both still holding hands as they left the room, into the lobby. They sat down for a minute, keeping their hands interlocked, talking about nothing, simply enjoying the other's company.

….

‘Hellooo, is anyone here?’ Someone called out, and they quickly separated their hands.
‘Ah, Hajime, Nagito! We are meeting back at the restaurant to share our findings, if you do not mind, I ask for your attendance.’ Sonia asked cheerfully, clasping her hands in glee. She really did hold herself together well, so formal even in the company of friends.
‘ ‘Course, we're on our way.’
‘Splendid! I will see you there.’ As Sonia left the venue, Hajime looked back,
‘Shall we go?’ Nagito nodded in response, and just like that, their alone time had ended as fast as it had begun.

….

‘So a movie theatre, a motel, a music venue and a hospital? That's it?’ Akane grumbled, somehow still stuffing herself with food.
‘Ibuki would call that a win! Yahoo!’ She squealed.
‘No one wants to hear you scream, or speak for that matter. Shut up for all our sakes.’ Hiyoko growled, clearly annoyed. The mood was not a pleasant one, as everyone was filled with frustration that once again, there seemed to be no means of escape. It was hard to ignore, but at least someone was trying to lift spirits.
‘Hey, hey. It could be worse. We could have nothing… I think.’ Chiaki said, not looking up from her gamegirl.
‘She is right, there is still much to be grateful for.’ Sonia concluded, smiling.
‘Exactly, Miss Sonia!’
‘Do you have to agree with everything she says…?’ Fuyuhiko mutters… justifiably.
But even so, she is right. There is a lot to be thankful for, Hajime thought. Fuyuhiko’s return, a hospital for emergencies, not to mention Nagito. And Monokuma hadn’t introduced one of those stupid “motives” again…

‘Hey kids! Whatchu up tooooo….?’ Monokuma had appeared. Shit, I totally jinxed it.
‘Get out of here, we all hate looking at your stupid face.’ Hiyoko hissed, spitting on Monokuma.
‘You're not gonna want to be sharing spit when you hear what I have to say now!’
‘The hell is that supposed to mean?!’ Fuyuhiko sat up, taking charge. It was noble, but it's not like he could actually stand up to Monokuma.

‘Well, it's getting kinda boring. I know it's only been 24 hours, but still… I’m impatient, okay? Soooo… guess what I haveee?’ Monokuma chuckled in a singsong voice. Everyones body stiffened, their hairs standing on end. Is this what I think it is? Hajime dreaded the thought, but unfortunately, he was right.

‘A…Motive?’ Hajime hesitantly asked.
‘Ding ding ding! What a smart boy you are! I understand why someone would want a piece of -’
‘W-what is the motive?’ Hajime interrupted. Monomi had not revealed his secret, but the possibility of Monokuma doing so was definitely still on the table. He didn't like the idea of this mastermind having something to hold over his head, but for now, he just hoped it would not come to that.

‘I’m glad you asked, my goodfella. This round's motive is called… the despair disease! I will be spreading it when you least expect it. The symptoms differ from person to person, so you may not be able to tell if someone has it at first! Good luck, and have fun!’ Monokuma chuckled, and disappeared as fast as he arrived.

‘Wait, what?’ There was a collective confusion.
‘How is that a motive?’
‘Is the symptom… murder or something?’
‘T-that is possible. There have been d-diseases that can make you go on a m-murderous rampage…’
‘Shit, way to make us feel better!’
‘Aah- im s-sorry!’ Mikan squealed. But she was right, this disease could be anything… it could even just simply be… deadly.
‘Stay calm, everyone. It could be something simple, like a disease that makes us tell only the truth. I think I read that in a Japanese manga once…’
‘You can just say manga… it's already Japanese…’
Without meaning to, Sonia had already calmed the air. Everyone’s mood seemed to improve, albeit only slightly. She truly was destined to rule a country, with her diplomatic skills, Hajime thought.
‘The ice duchess is correct, this matter cannot simply be solved. We mustn't fret, not until a solution has revealed itself to us…’ Gundham explained.
‘Y-yeah, what he said, Miss Sonia!’ Ignoring Kazuichi piggybacking off of Gundham’s advice, they were right. Panicking now wouldn't solve anything. They couldn't do anything to fix the problem until the problem actually arised. So they all agreed to retire to their cottages until the morning, and regroup at the restaurant to update each other on any developments.

I sincerely hope this doesn't turn into another murder, Hajime thought. Wishful thinking, huh?

Chapter Text

Part 4 - Chapter 3

Hajime had retired to his cottage for the night, after spending some time with Fuyuhiko. He enjoyed hanging out with him, he had some interesting stories. He was a nice guy, really, and he couldn’t understand anyone not seeing that. It was a good day overall, but the anxiety of the “despair disease” was looming over him, whatever it was. Regardless, he was glad he had something to smile about. Nagito. I… miss him.

It was ridiculous really, it had only been a couple of hours since they had seen each other. But Hajime found himself longing to see his smile, his fluffy white hair, his…
Hajime had gone to the supermarket to find some lube before bed, just in case. He was holding the bottle now, pondering if he should use it.
Would he, again? He didn't exactly disagree to “postpone”... But that was a one time thing, right? He might have changed his mind by now, and he's probably got more important things to worry about. But he still couldn't get it out of his mind. It wouldn't hurt to visit, and see what happens, right? His intentions were impure, sure, but if anything, he could still spend time with Nagito, and he considered that a win in his own right, if that's all he got. He slipped the lube in his pocket, just in case, and got up to leave. No time to be anxious about this, he was going to muster up the courage, no matter what.

As he stepped out of his cottage, and walked towards Nagito’s, he was met with a blur of orange, and crashed into… whatever it was.
‘Ow… what the heck?’
‘Hiyoko…? What are you doing out here?’ Crap. Am I caught?
‘Looking out for Nagito’s sex freak partner, and you?’ Hiyoko smirked. Of course she is.
‘Uh…same. I was curious too.’ He said, as convincingly as possible. It seemed to work though, as Hiyoko smiled.
‘Great, I’ve been out here for ages, I could use some entertainment.’ She snickered.
‘Has it ever occurred to you to just…ask?’ Hiyoko frowned.
‘You really think he’d tell anyone? He’s probably super ashamed. And whoever he’s doing it with must be equally as disgusting too… I bet it's that slutty nurse.’ Hiyoko laughed.
‘Hiyoko, seriously, woah. Don’t… say stuff like that.’ She frowned at the boy, clearly disappointed he hadn't found her insults amusing.
‘W-whatever… But maybe we could catch him in the act! Let's go!’ Before Hajime could protest, Hiyoko had grabbed his arm and was dragging him to Nagito’s cottage.
‘W-wait, its super late, it's rude to-’
‘It’s hilarious you think I care. And you were curious too, you know.’ she laughed, knocking on the door. Hajime stood behind Hiyoko, hoping if Nagito saw her first, he would understand the situation and not say anything too damning as he opened the door.

‘Saionji-san? Hinata-kun?’
‘Sorry…’ Hajime whispered, embarrassed. Luckily, Nagito was wearing a shirt tonight, or surely his blushing would give him away.
‘We wanna know who you've been secretly screwing. And there's no use denying, we all saw that love bite.’ Hiyoko spat out, and not giving him any time to answer, barged into the cottage. Nagito was taken aback.
‘Saionji-san, I’m honoured you opted to visit myself, but I’m afraid I don’t understand…’ Nagito said, flustered, his space being invaded all of a sudden. Hiyoko was searching every nook and cranny, trying to find “evidence”, whatever that meant.

‘Hiyoko, cmon, this is rude. He was probably just sleeping…’ Hajime said, shooting Nagito a look that said I’m so so sorry. Nagito shot back with a smile that said I understand, it's alright.
Hiyoko completely ignored both of them though, and was now under the bed…

‘C’mon condom wrappers, where are you…’ She mumbled.

‘How is that gonna tell you who he did it with? And anyway, we don't know he went that far, he could’ve just made out with the guy or something…’ Hajime claimed. ‘O-or girl…’
Hiyoko popped her head out from under the bed, and stood up to look at the stuttering boy.

‘Oh. My. Gosh. It was you, wasn't it? All flustered and crap! You didn't leave your cottage to look for the culprit, you are the culprit, aren't you?’ Hiyoko was wide-eyed, snickering.

‘N-no, now wait a minute…’ Nagito held his hands up in protest, but it was too late. Hiyoko’s hand shot forward, and pulled the lube Hajime had brought out his pocket.

‘Hah!’ Hajime flushed a deep red, and Nagito pink in turn. Nagito looked at him, and smirked. He shot him a look that said: Wow, Hinata. I’m impressed. Hajime only flushed a deeper red.
‘Okay, okay just wait a minute. Let's talk.’ He protested, shutting the door of the cabin.

‘This is just too good. Hajime and Nagito? I never would have guessed… And I heard you went to the movies together, were you snogging in there too? What were you getting up to that made Monokuma add that rule, huh? You freaks!’ Hiyoko was absolutely laughing her ass off. If they didn't act quick, she would shout their secret for every one of their classmates to hear.

‘Hiyoko, please… please can you just keep your mouth shut about this, please…’ Hajime begged, practically on his knees.
‘And why should I, huh? Everyone would have something else to talk about except murder and crap. Plus, it's hilarious!’ Shit, there's no letting up with her. I didn't want it to come to this, but…

‘I didn’t tell anyone about you and Mahiru.’
‘W-what?!’ Hiyoko’s eyes widened, dropping the lube. Tears started to well in her eyes, blushing. ‘H-how did you know about that?’

‘I’m sorry, but I saw your kiss. I wanted to comfort you, but I wasn’t supposed to know about you two. Now it's out in the open… I’m really sorry, Hiyoko…’ Hajime really did mean every word. He had seen them kiss, once, behind the beachhouse when they thought no one was looking. It didn’t seem like a first kiss, so he figured it was more serious than that, deciding to keep it to himself. Hiyoko was sniffling, warm tears running down her cheeks, not the normal screaming she did when she was just trying to get her way. She was grieving.
‘I truly am sorry to bring it up, but I understand what it’s like to keep that kind of thing a secret. You must understand, how important it is, so… please, Hiyoko.’ Hajime leaned forward without thinking, and pulled her into a hug. Surprisingly, she didn't pull away, sobbing into Hajime’s chest. He let her cry, for just a moment. She needs this, he thought.
‘I’m really sorry about Mahiru, Hiyoko. And I’m not just saying that…’

‘I-I’m sorry… I won’t tell anyone… for Mahiru. I promise.’ Hiyoko sniffled, pulling away, clearly embarrassed.
‘It's alright, Hiyoko. If you ever wanted to talk, I’m here..’
‘Don't push it.’ She spat. But she smiled, regardless. ‘I'll leave so you two can go back to your snogging session or whatever. I still think you’re freaks…’ She snickered, but she seemed kinder- to Hiyoko’s standards, anyway. So she walked out the door, closing it behind her, and Hajime sighed in relief.
‘That could have gone worse….’
‘You truly are kind, Hinata-kun.’ Nagito smiled, and sat down on his bed, tired from all the ruckus. Hajime joined him, and took his hand. They sat in silence for a minute, recovering from the commotion.

…

It was Hajime who broke the silence.
‘Are you worried, about this… disease?’
‘Not particularly, no. I believe that hope will shine through and it won't go too badly. I have faith in my Ultimate classmates.’ Nagito concluded, seemingly glad to be around so much “hope” as he would say.
‘Glad there’s someone…’
‘Are you worried, Hajime?’
‘H-hajime?’ he stuttered.
‘Sorry, shall I not call you that?’ Nagito frowned, embarrassed.
‘No, no. You just caught me off guard is all.’ Hajime blushed, and Nagito smiled back.
‘But yes, I am worried. I can’t help it. A disease? What does that mean? The uncertainty is killing me…’ Hajime whined. It was really quite terrifying, just how unknown it was. It could literally be anything, Monokuma had pulled off worse before, so he was truly anxious.

‘Well, if it’s appropriate, I know a way to ease your tension…’ Nagito whispered, pointing to the lube Hiyoko dropped off the floor. ‘I assume you know it too?’ He was nervous, Hajime could tell. But he was initiating this time, and Hajime wasn't going to let any silence make him uncertain.

‘I know it all too well…’ He smiled. He was glad to have the subject changed, to a much happier one. However, there was something he was dying to know…
‘But, wait… I was wondering, what-what are we?’ Hajime asked nervously. Sure, they were in a sexual relationship, and they had held hands, but was that it? I mean,
‘A-actually, nevermind. We’ve only known each other about a week- well, remembered each other for a week…’ He admitted, thinking back to his school memories apparently being stolen. He was embarrassed he had even asked… His thoughts were spiralling. It hasn't felt like a week. Nagito didn't feel like a fling… Not that he had ever had one.
‘You're right, Hinata-kun.’ Nagito sighed, frowning. Crap, I've upset him. I gotta say something.
‘W-well… I do like you! A lot…’ And he really did. It had only been a week, yes. But Nagito felt right. He was wonderful, if a bit self deprecating. Not a crazy person, not really, and the parts of him that are, he was trying to improve. His drive to become a better person was clearly there, Hajime thought. Plus, he’s gorgeous.
‘Really?’ Nagito whispered, blushing. Hajime had said that last part out loud. Why? He thought solemnly. Why enjoy the company of filth like me? Hajime is so wonderful, he doesn't deserve to have to be in my presence, but he likes me? I thought this was a one time thing, but…

‘L-look. If we both get out of here, in one piece, which we will…’ Hajime stuttered. Just say it!
‘Would you wanna, maybe… go out sometime?’
There. He had said it. They were going to survive this hell, come out stronger, together. He’d do anything to leave this island, be able to go to a normal class in hopes peak, go to a cafe after study hall and buy Nagito a drink. Watch him smile, pleased with himself. Happy. There was nothing they couldn't face, he thought, if a bit cheesy. But it didn't matter right now, as Hajime looked into those greyish green eyes, his smile widening, Hajime Hinata was melting.
‘That… sounds lovely, Hajime.’ Nagito smiled, ‘I’ve never been on a date before, but I’m glad it shall be with you.’

They were smiling, grinning, beaming, and Hajime couldn't think of any more synonyms for how he was feeling. He was just so… happy. And for the night, he completely forgot about the despair disease, the murders of his classmates, and Monokuma altogether. As they kissed, his fears melted away. As Hajime pushed Nagito onto the bed, there were no thoughts of despair. As Hajime ripped off his clothes, and Nagito’s in turn, the world around them completely disappeared. He didn't need to survive, he didn't need to escape… He just needed to break Nagito. Right goddamn now.

‘Ah, Hajime, wait! You’re going to cause the same problem!’ Nagito cried, as Hajime sucked and bit him every inch of his neck, face, chin, jaw.
‘If everyone knows you got fucked, they might as well know you got fucked good.’ he purred, adding a hickey underneath Nagito’s nipple.
‘A-aah, Hajime…’ Nagito groaned. His entire upper body would be purple tomorrow, by this rate. But neither of them cared.
Nagito, in the hopes to give himself a break for a second, leaned down and grabbed the lube that Hiyoko had dropped from the floor.
‘Aren’t you forgetting something? I wonder what you were thinking of when you purchased this?’
‘I was…. Getting to that.’ Hajime muttered. He had completely forgotten about it, lost in caressing Nagito’s soft pale skin, every inch.
Hajime was annoyed at being called out, and he showed it.
‘I’m getting you back for that.’ He growled, his mouth elapsing over Nagito’s dick, licking the tip.
‘H-hajime wait, you're going to…!’ But Hajime’s tongue was doing a lap from the bottom of his shaft, right up to the tip, going in a circular motion, and he wasn’t going to stop, not one chance in hell.
‘H-haaji-mee…’ He whined. ‘Y-you're too good to m-m-meee… Aaaah! H-hajime, seriously, I’m….!’
Hajime just smiled. His rhythm was working, he was exhausting Nagito and he was not going to let up. He closed his lips against the bottom of his cock, letting him cum straight down his throat. ‘Hajime! Please, I’m-’
‘Do it. You can, Nagito.’ Hajime replied, though muffled. And so Nagito let go.
‘Mmmfgh…. ‘ As it started to flood out, Hajime gripped his cock and milked Nagito for all he was worth, straight into Hajime’s mouth. As Hajime sat up, he made sure he had an audience, and very visibly swallowed.
‘H-hajime!-’ Nagito spluttered, but Hajime just smirked. He was so out of breath, sweat all over, face pink with strain, eyes watering.
‘I wish I could take a picture, you look so beautiful like that.’
‘I-I don't know what to say, Hajime…’ Nagito wheezed. Hajime chuckled at his exhaustion.
‘Thank you?’
‘Ah, yes. Thank you, Hajime. But… what about you?’ Hajime was still hard, unsatisfied.
‘It's alright, don’t worry about me. I just wanted you to have a good- wait w-what?’ Nagito was not having any of it. He had got on his knees on the hard cottage floor, and clasped his mouth over Hajime’s dick, almost choking himself. He licked the shaft while sucking on the tip, gripping his thighs, and Hajime had no time to refuse. He was good.
‘O-oh… Nagito…mmghh…’ fuck, he was really good.
Hajime grabbed his white hair and shoved his mouth into his crotch. He was pulling his hair, not helping it. Nagito’s tongue was driving him crazy.

He gave a very loud, obvious, embarrassing whine when he heard his dick pop out of the boy's mouth.
‘H-hey…’
‘I want to mark you too, Hajime.’ Nagito whispered, somehow with a straight face.
‘I would love that, but then it will be obvious who did who. I’m really sorry I gave you away, but…’
‘Relax, Hajime. I’ll do it where no one will see, I understand.’ he said with a small chuckle. ‘But still, I want to mark you as…m-mine.’ He admitted, blushing. Hajime sat there wide eyed. His dick dripping with saliva and precum, on a hellish island with no escape, and the most gorgeous boy he had ever met wanted him to be his.
‘Yes. Please.’ Hajime answered, a little too enthusiastically. Nagito just smiled softly, then looked at his crotch like it was a piece of meat. Hungry. His mouth bent back down, to his inner thigh, and bit softly, slowly sucking his thighs to leave a very small, but well refined mark. There’s no way he hasn’t done this before.
‘A-ah… that's… perfect, Nagito.’ Hajime smiled. But he was itching for his blow job to continue, so without thinking, he grabbed Nagito’s head and shoved his dick back into his throat.
‘A-ammmffgh’ Nagito spluttered.
‘I’m sorry, but, please.’ He needed relief, now. Hajime stood up, dick still down Nagito’s throat, hand firmly grasped amidst white locks. He started thrusting forward, fucking Nagito’s mouth.
‘Y-you're… so good… N-nagito...p-please, let this.. aAh… not be the last time…’ Hajime strained, thrusting between each word. But Nagito couldn't reply, occupied with serving Hajime. He was very happy to hear those words, nonetheless. It didn't take many more thrusts before Hajime was finished. As Hajime had done before, Nagito milked the last of it into his mouth, and stood up, eye level with Hajime once again. But instead of following Hajime’s example, Nagito simply took his hands in his own, and kissed Hajime. Deeply, devouring him from the inside with his tongue, letting his own cum get swallowed by both of them. It was sloppy, and messy, but they loved it.

As they separated their lips, saliva trailing off, they looked away, flushed. The heavy mood had worn off now, embarrassed to be looking at each other with such hungry eyes.

‘I-I should clean myself up.’ Nagito whispered, not making eye contact.
‘Good idea.’
As embarrassing as it was as an afterthought, tonight was a wonderful night for the both of them.

Sadly, the lube had been overlooked once again.

…

As they slipped their underwear back on, they sat back down on Nagito’s bed.
‘That was…’
‘Yeah…’
Hajime wanted to say: That was good. But he couldn't find it in himself to say. Yes, the night had been good, but he wanted more. Hajime didn't understand his feelings. They were going to go on a date when they got out of here. Not if, when. They had been having sex, they said they liked each other… Why was he still unsatisfied? Why was there a feeling bubbling up inside of him, what was it telling him? He was so confused, but he knew he must be doing something right. Every time he touched Nagito, that feeling went away. Was he addicted?
Would he just have to keep holding Nagito, touching Nagito, feeling Nagito? Was it wrong to need him in this way? But when he saw Nagito smile, when he saw Nagito hold back from calling himself gross, the feeling came back. That couldn't possibly be wrong. But he didn't even know if the feeling was good or bad. Where was it coming from, his heart or his brain? Maybe they were connected somehow… Maybe in their stolen school memories, they were together, boyfriends even? Hajime smiled at the thought. As he held Nagito’s hand, sat on his bed, it didn't really matter. He was happy. That bubbling feeling wasn't overlapping with his happiness, so it couldn't be wrong. All he knew was that he was looking forward to their date, whenever it may come.

…

Nagito wanted Hajime to stay, but didn't know how to ask. It had come up naturally last night, but today there wasn't really a good reason. He just simply wanted Hajime to hold him again. Was that a good enough reason? He felt as though he needed him to stay, but he knew that wasn’t true. Then what was this? Was it admiration, for a hope-filled classmate? Was it glee, from said hope-filled classmate saying he liked him, him!? Or was it fear, fear that his luck may strike at any moment and take Hajime away from him. He tried to piece together his thoughts, but he was truly exhausted, and his body was so heavy. His eyelids were heavy, too, now that he thought about it, eyelashes fluttering. Nagito yawned, delirious, drifting off to sleep.
‘Please stay with me, Hajime…’ He whispered, as his body fell onto Hajime’s shoulder, sound asleep. He knew he wanted that, at least. At least he knew one thing. So he clung onto that thought as he drifted off to sleep. Hajime caught him effortlessly, and smiled, patting his hair. He slowly lowered Nagito onto his bed, tucked him in, and gave him a small peck on the cheek.

In a whisper, he was beaming:

‘Anything you want.’

Anything for him.

Chapter Text

Part 5 - Chapter 3

Nagito woke up before Hajime did. His first instinct was to freak out. What on earth was this warm, toned thing in his arms? But he quickly realised it was Hajime, and all fears subsided. A memory suddenly strung back to him, what they did last night, and what he had said as he drifted off to sleep: “Please stay with me, Hajime”. Nagito flushed pink. Had he really said that, out loud? But obviously his prayers were answered, the Hajime he spoke of lay on his chest, breathing softly, lips parted in ignorance. He is truly beautiful. Nagito smiled. He didn't know what time it was, but the Monokuma announcement had not gone off, that stark reminder that they were not in a safe place. So he let himself lie there, petting Hajime’s dark, silky hair. He let out a purr in his sleep, unknowingly enjoying himself. He’s so childish sometimes…

…

‘Hey, ass-face! Is you-know-who still in there?!’ Nagito heard a loud knocking. The Monokuma announcement had gone off, but surprisingly had not disturbed Hajime. However, this did.

‘Aah! What the heck is that!’ Hajime shouted, startled awake.
Hiyoko was the one to answer the call.
‘You idiot, if it had been anyone but me your secret would have been out, and…ew! Are you guys naked?! Get dressed, you freaks!’ Hiyoko had walked in on her own accord, not waiting for permission, karma striking immediately.

‘Saionji-san! W-what are you doing here? A-and we’re not… bare…’
‘How can you be so childish to not want to say “naked” out loud but still be covered in hickeys?! Can’t believe you're the one getting laid here…’ Hiyoko snickered, and she was right. Nagito’s entire expanse of neck was purple in various hickeys and bruises, spreading to his jaw and collarbone like a disease.
‘A-ah… It’s not what it looks like! Please do not think impure thoughts!’
‘It's totally what it looks like, Hiyoko. Jealous?’ Hajime smirked, clearly proud of his work.
Nagito’s blood rushed to his cheeks faster than they ever had.
‘H-Haj-Hinata-kun!’

‘Gross! I hope you never open your fat ugly stupid mouth again! But seriously, you guys need to get up if you wanna keep your secret. I had a feeling you guys would be having a sleepover,’ Hiyoko jeered, ‘So I was late to the restaurant on purpose, so if you guys were late we could claim we were together… look less suspicious, yknow…?’

‘Wait, Hiyoko, you did all that for us?’
‘No, just you. He’s still a freak. You have shit taste. Plus, I recently learned the importance of a solid alibi…’ She added, thinking back to the last trial she had to endure.
‘Still… I really, really appreciate it Hiyoko. Thank you, so much.’
‘W-whatever!’ Hiyoko blushed. ‘But hurry up! I’ll go get some makeup so we can deal with this, you get changed. Seriously, Hajime, you're a freak.’ Hiyoko finished, sticking out her tongue, but smiling back at them. Their conversation last night had obviously taken a toll on her, Hajime thought. He was glad she was feeling better.

‘I’m really sorry, Nagito.’
‘It’s alright, Hajime. I am just thankful our classmates can be so kind.’
‘You look good.’
‘Oh! Uh… y-yes, you too, Hajime.’ Nagito stuttered. Hajime is clearly not the Ultimate Thesaurus, but still. He’s so kind, singing my praises out of the blue.
‘I mean it. Now, cmon.’ Hajime got up to get dressed, not before landing a small peck on the starstruck boy, shooting him a soft smile.

…

Hiyoko, Hajime and Nagito were walking to the restaurant. Hiyoko had covered most of Nagito’s love bites, but she wasn’t a miracle worker. Luckily, it just looked like he had fallen on his jaw, that area was the hardest to fix. It seemed Hajime had a favourite spot.

‘So, what’s our cover story, freaks?’
‘Huh?’
‘For why we were late…? Duh…’
‘Ah, yes, you are intelligent as always Saionji-san’
‘How about: we were helping you with your kimono?’
‘T-that would never need to happen!’
‘It’s on backwards, Hiyoko. And the bow is crooked. Do you need me to actually fix it, because I will.’
Hiyokos cheeks flushed in anger.
‘Ugh… Fine! Fine! Hajime Hinata, Ultimate Know-it-all. Whatever, just fix the bow, I guess…’
‘Haha, okay, Hiyoko. No worries.’ He shot her a smile, and she frowned back, but she wasn’t nearly as hostile as she could have been. Clearly, Hiyoko had a growing soft spot for the boy, though she would never admit it.

…

‘There you guys are!’
‘You're late.’
‘Where were you?’

Hajime and Nagito stood there dumbfounded. They didn't really know what to say that everyone would believe. So they both turned to Hiyoko for help. She rolled her eyes.

‘Yesterday, Nagito fell on his jaw into Hajime, see?’ She pointed to the “bruise” under Nagito’s chin. ‘He was embarrassed, so I didn't say anything. But it started to swell, so we went to get some ice, that's all.’

She shot them a look that said idiots, that was obvious. Hajime didn’t think that was obvious.

Hiyoko, why is that actually plausible? It explains why we were late, and denies the existence of the hickey… She can’t have come up with that on the fly, she planned this excuse. Why was she helping us, when she had nothing to gain?

‘Y-yes! Saionji-san is so kind, helping myself out when she could be doing something much less filthy.’
Fuyuhiko scoffed. ‘Since when is Saionji kind? And why on Earth didn't he correct anyone yesterday?’

‘You guys weren't exactly giving him a chance!’ Hajime defended, sporting an aggressively protective stance in front of Nagito. Everyone started to look guilty, cursing themselves for embarrassing the boy.

‘Well, it wouldn't have swelled if it was a hickey…’
‘It does look bigger…’ blood rushed to the guilty parties’ cheeks.
‘We’re sorry, Nagito.’
He stumbled at the sudden rush of affection and countless apologies, knowing they were only apologising because Hiyoko had lied through her teeth. However, as ashamed as he was for disrespecting his classmates, he was glad Hiyoko would go to such lengths to support him. Maybe not him, but her support of Hajime was aiding him, too, so he was grateful regardless.

‘Then, who was the perpetrator for the rule Monokuma instated?’ Sonia chimed in. She was right, this isn't over. Someone having sex on this island, in this very small group of teenagers, was prime gossip that no one was going to give up very easily. The battle to keep their secret was a long-winded, tedious one. But Hajime would not let up.

‘Could be anyone, there are loads of sluts on this island!’
‘Hiyoko!’ Hajime had a growing soft spot for the girl, but he wouldn’t ever tolerate her foul-mouthed attitude.
‘Okay, okay. I’m sorry. But it could be anyone, I’m right about that…’
Fuyuhiko scoffed. ‘Alright, alright. So,’ he pointed to each suspect:
‘Sonia, totally. Hiyoko, nah. Nagito, I still find suspicious. Hajime, high chance.’
Hajime blushed.
‘Kazuichi, no chance in hell.’
‘H-hey!’
‘Ibuki, maybe, Gundham, I could see it,’
‘Y-you could see it?! Why him?’ Kazuichi frowned.
‘Akane… Wait, where is Akane? And Nekomaru, for that matter?’

Shit. He was right. Everyone looked around, eyes darting around the room, but they were nowhere to be found. Breakfast had started almost an hour ago, now. The restaurant was suddenly filled with screams, squeals and panicking. What happened to them? Nekomaru was always on time, and Akane never didn’t show up for breakfast. Where were they? Had they fallen to the disease? Had they gotten hurt? Were they…? Are they…? V-victims…? No, no no no no no no not again! Please, not again! As Hajime’s mind spiralled, head cupped in his hands, squatted to the floor, his mind was reeling. His face was completely pale.
‘Hajime. Look at me.’
Nagito had squatted down next to him. In the commotion, he felt that taking Hajime’s hand wouldn't be noticed.
‘We’ll find them. Nidai-san and Owari-san would never lose a fight, you know that. It will turn out alright, I swear on my belief in our classmates.’ He smiled, whispering. He squeezed his hand.
‘Breathe.’
Hajime did as he was told, copying Nagito’s breathing pattern, and managed to calm down.
‘Y-you're right. You always are… T-thank you, Nagito.’
But he just smiled softly.
‘Let’s go find them, shall we?’ he whispered, giving Hajime’s hand another squeeze of motivation.
He’s right. It'll be fine. It’s too soon for another murder. Everybody swore it wouldn't happen again, and I believe my friends.

Suddenly, Monomi appeared.
‘Students! Owari, Nidai! They're… Fighting Monokuma! On the… beach… first island…’
She huffed and puffed, out of breath.
‘W-what!’
‘Fighting Monokuma?!’
‘They’ll get killed!’
‘Quickly, everyone!’

…

‘AKANE! STOOOOP!!!’

As they ran to the beach, they heard Nekomaru yelling. This couldn't be good.

‘SOMEONE’S GOTTA PUT UP A FIGHT, HUH?’

Akane was in a standoff against Monokuma, bloodlust in her eyes.

‘If you do this, that's a law-break, and you know what’ll happen! Puhuhu!’ Monokuma said in a sing-song voice.

‘YOU CAN’T PUNISH ME IF YOU’RE DEAD!!!’

‘AKANE, NO!’

The second Akane stepped forward, Monokuma took that as “probable cause”, leaping forward, claws brandished, ready to strike. Akane readied herself, but he had brought a gun to a fist-fight. She had no chance, as great as she was. Everyone braced for impact, eyes tightly shut. They heard a loud squelch and scratch, the sound of metal breaking through skin, and as they opened their eyes, all they could see was pink.

Nekomaru had taken the hit for his disciple. He was bleeding out his torso, coughing up blood. Hajime couldn't look away, mind focused on the blood. He may have heard someone vomiting behind him, but he was simply transfixed. The Ultimate Team Manager, Nekomaru Nidai had been struck down. Everyone thought it wasn’t possible. He was so hopeful, so bright. Always smiling, cheering everyone on. Now, life was fading from his eyes.

‘Nekomaru… no…’ Akane cried, rushing forward to his side. ‘What’d you do that for, huh?’
She was stuck to a soft whisper, her voice as comforting as she could make it.
‘What’d I say, huh? You can rely on me. I’m your manager, ain’t I?!’ He splattered, sounding all too cheerful for the blood flowing from his lips.

‘No…’

‘Wait!!!’ Monomi screams, appearing out of nowhere. ‘Big brother, you can’t kill someone who didn’t break the rules!!! That makes you break the rules!’

Monokuma paused for a moment, and the smile on his face started to grow weaker.

‘… you're right… but I’ll get you back for this. So unfair, so unfair…’ Monokuma grumbled. Suddenly, an ambulance comes out of nowhere, picks up Nekomaru and speeds away, to Akane’s dismay.

‘W-wait… what?’
‘Is he gonna be okay?’
‘Is it okay to leave him with Monokuma?’
‘What happened?’

A rumble of confusion and panic erupted, a general consensus of: what the heck just happened?!, but Hajime spotted a lone silent girl, slumped on the floor.

‘Akane? H-he’ll be alright, I’m sure of it… They brought Fuyuhiko back, didn’t they?’
Hajime whispered. Akane was sniffling, but he could see her consideration flash across her face. But she looked up, and gleamed, a sudden burst of confidence.
‘Y-yeah! Nothing can kill Nidai-senpai! No one! Not even a stupid bear!’
‘Yeah, exactly.’
‘Guys!!! It’ll be fine!!! If Monokuma can heal Fuyuhiko, he can heal up Nidai no problem!’
Akane shouted to the crowd, and she was right. Hajime didn’t mind the spotlight leaving him, if his classmates could be happy. He’d be okay, right? He would be okay. He just would.

He had to.

Chapter Text

Part 6 - Chapter 3

With everyone’s hopes dedicated to praying for Nekomaru’s survival, the panic on the beach subsided. They all agreed that he would survive, it only made sense. As they were walking back to their cottages, as it wasn’t too late, most people went to hang out at the restaurant or other venues across the islands. They had all split off into various groups by now: Sonia and Gundham (Kazuichi tagging along), Ibuki and Mikan etc. It seemed everyone had made a solid friend or two by now. But not Nagito. All he had was Hajime. As he watched everyone split up into groups, he couldn't help but feel left out.

‘Hey, Hajime, you coming?’ Fuyuhiko was beckoning for Hajme who was walking beside him. He had been enjoying the walk, hands periodically brushing against each other and exchanging secret smiles. That would be over now, Hajime had far better things to do after all.

‘Sorry, Hiko. I’m tired, I’m off to bed.’
‘Fair enough dude. Cya.’ He nodded, leaving to talk to Mikan and Ibuki.
‘You’re tired Hinata-kun? Would you like me to leave as well?’
‘No, and I’m not tired. Just… come on!’
‘H-huh?’ But Hajime had grabbed Nagito’s hand the second Fuyuhiko had turned a corner, and was sprinting to the cottages.
The door slammed on Hajime’s cottage, Nagito leaned up against it, kissing him deeply and hungrily.
‘A-ah, Hajime!’
‘I’m sorry, but I’ve been waiting for this all day.’
‘It’s been 3 hours!’
But Hajime shut him up, slamming him back onto the door, searching for the skin of his back. The second he found it, he ripped his shirt off, jacket with it, grabbing at his skin, desperately, hungrily. It was as if his contact with Nagito’s pale skin was all that was giving him life, not letting him breathe for even a second. He needed him, so gravely. He had an urgency to caress every inch of skin on Nagito, stroking his jaw, grabbing at his waist, pulling him in deeper. His tongue wouldn't leave his mouth for even a moment, starving for his taste, eating him out from the inside. The force and pressure of it all started to make them sweat, profusely, hair started to stick to Hajime’s forehead. He left the warm embrace of Nagito’s lips for just a moment, if only to free his own skin from the shackles of his shirt, ripping his tie at the seams in the process, but he didn’t care. That short moment of departure from Nagito was torture, and he had to double his force as he slammed back into him, hips grinding against Nagito’s now very erect waistline. He had to make up for lost time, grabbing Nagito’s hair and pulling him down so he didn’t have to leave his kiss as he unzipped their trousers, pulling them off.
‘Hajime, oh…’
As Nagito moaned, Hajime didn’t speak, not risking letting up his momentum. He needed to be inside Nagito now. Fill him up now. His dick was twitching for attention, and it could only come from Nagito. But it wasn’t just that. Every cell, every hair, every bead of sweat was screaming, pleading for Nagito’s embrace.

Hajime took off his briefs, and looked at the sweating scarlet boy pinned against the door in front of him, begging for permission to do the same. Nagito understood, ripping off his own boxer shorts, cock springing out. No words had been spoken, their bodies doing all the talking. Hajime picked up Nagito, thighs resting on his waist, and as aggressively as he could, shoved his cock into the boy he cared for so dearly.

‘A-aAh!’
‘Is this oka-’
‘YES! Don’t stop! Hajime, don’t stop!’

Thrust.

‘A-ah!’

Nagito’s back arched against the door.

Thrust

Tears of beautiful pain flowed down his cheeks.

Thrust.

Their bodies started to stick together, coated in sweat.

Thrust.

The air smelt of precum and a thick aroma of love.

Thrust.

‘Mffgfh…’

It was love.

Thrust.

Hajime was in love.

Thrust.

‘N-nagito! A-aaAhhh!’

Thrust.

‘Hajime! Yo-you!’

Thrust.

He loved every inch of him.

Thrust.

Nagito was screaming in sweet and sickly agony.

Thrust.

Hajime couldn’t stop.

Thrust.

They’d be sore in the morning, but they didn’t care.

Thrust.

Hajime’s back arched to get in as deeply as possible.

Thrust.

Nagito’s eye’s squeezed shut, suddenly cumming over Hajime’s chest.

‘Aaaahhhhhh hajimeeee….’

Thrust.

It dripped down his wet chest, and that pushed him over the edge.

Thrust.

As Hajime’s cum filled the boy he loved, some dripping out of his asshole onto the floor, he thrusted one last time to milk out everything he had. They both leaned against the door, not pulling out, chests recoiling up and down, tears streaming down their faces, cheeks pink. They stayed like that for a few minutes, Hajime’s now sticky chest leaning against Nagito’s cock. Head nuzzled in, listening to his heartbeat. They couldn’t find the words for what they felt, but it didn’t matter as they couldn’t form any noise, head filled with bliss and breathing too heavily to communicate. Nagito felt Hajime’s cock inside of him, squeezed tightly against him now, not letting go. He couldn't help but lean down and kiss Hajime deeply, hands gripped around his neck. He smiled into the kiss, so happy, so grateful for the boy in front of him. The makeup had been melted off from the heat of the moment, hickeys now showing all down his chest and up his jaw, the one line love bite on Hajime’s inner thigh looking very lonely right about now, but Hajime didn’t care. As they gently kissed, Hajime’s thoughts started to become clearer.

I’m falling in love with him. Fuck, I’m falling in love with Nagtio Komaeda. It feels so… nice. I can’t get the words out of my head, but it doesn’t feel like a bad thing. I love him, that's what the feeling is. Holding him is so nice, being inside of him is so nice, it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It’s love, I’m sure of it. He probably doesn’t feel the same way, sure, but I oddly couldn’t care less. When I’m with him, I feel too good to care. And he at least likes me too, so I can’t feel guilty. I love him, I love Nagito Komaeda, so much. I’ll tell him one day, but for now, we have to get off this island and go on that date. I’ll tell him then, I swear it.

As Hajime’s beautiful realisation washed over him, consuming him, he forgot all about the despair he had felt just an hour ago. It was like nothing else mattered, except being by Nagito’s side. He had an urge to protect him, to keep him safe. And he would.

‘Nagito, I won’t let anything happen to you, ever. I promise.’
‘Hajime…?’
‘I promise.’

I swear it, Nagito Komaeda will survive this killing game, even if it means dying myself in the process.

He has to survive.

Chapter Text

Part 7 - Chapter 3

Nagito had just had such a wonderful experience. He was lying in bed, cuddled up to Hajime Hinata. He couldn’t believe his luck, being able to enjoy the presence of such a wonderful boy. He was hugging Hajime tightly, though he didn't feel he deserved such affection, he couldn't help it. See, in the heat of the moment, they once again had forgotten to use the lube Hajime so graciously bought for them, and now he was in immense pain, sore and face red in embarrassment. If my luck paid off to let me have such a wonderful evening with Hinata-kun, of course the bad luck would have to be as immense.

‘N-nagito, are you sure you're okay? I’m so sorry…’ Nagito couldn't see his face, buried in Nagito’s hair, but he felt his head get very warm, and knew his Hinata-kun was blushing.
‘Don’t be embarrassed, Hajime. I’ll be fine, I always am.’
‘Still…’
But he didn’t mind, not one bit, though he did dread having to limp back to his cottage very soon. He had such a wonderful time, leaned against that door in Hajime’s arms. My Hajime. I want him to be mine. I enjoy this feeling, but I should keep it to myself. My luck may run out, and he may finally realise how disgusting I am and leave me, it's only a matter of time. I should make it easier for him and try not to get attached. Then why is it so hard to leave his embrace…?

‘I wish you could stay, Nagito. I really do, but you should probably go soon.’
He’s right, we don't want a repeat of the panic of this morning.
‘Here, let me…’ Hajime grabbed some more of Hiyoko’s makeup from his bedside table, gently lifting his jaw to cover up the hickeys that had been exposed by the heat of Hajime’s hot chest. He blushed, feeling every instance of the brush caressing his chest, his collarbone, his tits…
He sat up in shock at the sensation, but winced, forgetting all about his aching-

‘Ah, you don’t have to… I mean, I’m so sorry you're in so much pain… I-I guess I got carried away, huh…’ He looked away, blushing further still.
Nagito softly held his cheek and turned his head back.
‘It’s alright, truly. I enjoyed myself.’
‘H-how do you say that with a straight face…!’
Nagito let a small giggle escape him, and smiled.
‘Because it's tr-’
‘Hm?’
‘Because it's t-t’ Why couldn’t he say it?
‘Because it's what?’ Hajime tilted his head, frowning.
‘Because it's not true! Wait, no it's not true! No, I'm trying to say it's false! Oh… Hajime… I feel fine…’
‘Huh?? Nagito, you don't look fine… you're starting to heat up…’
And it was true, his head started to ache, heating up.
‘Ah, Hajime, I can’t get the lie out. No, I can’t get the lie out… no…’
‘Wait, are you actually struggling to tell the truth?’
Nagito shook his head. No, he shook his head! What is happening, I can’t even nod? I must explain myself to Hajime so he doesn’t start to doubt himself… but, I can’t… Oh, I don’t feel so good…
As Nagito started to lose consciousness, he felt his body go limp and fall into Hajime.
‘N-nagito!! Nagito, what’s wrong!’ But he had fainted.
‘I-I need to get Mikan! She might know…’ But what if it's because of what we did…
He blushed, but he had no time for that. I’ll just dress him really quick, and bring Mikan over. I've covered up most of the hickeys anyway, I think… But it doesn't matter, what if he’s…? Wait.. what if it's the…

Despair disease. It had to be. He didn’t have time to cover up their actions, Nagito could die. He sprinted out of the cottage.

…

‘Mikan!! Mikan, please!!!’ He rushed to her cottage, knocking frantically.
‘Yes, H-hinata? W-what is it? It’s lovely to see you, but there's s-something wrong with Mioda and Owari, I need to tend to them, so could you come back la-’
‘Mikan, please! It's Nagito! An emergency! Please!’ He was out of breath from sprinting over.
‘O-okay! Kuzuryu-san, please stay with them for a minute…’ Mikan squealed, as she rushed to follow Hajime who was already sprinting back to Nagito.
‘A-alright…you got it… Damn, I don’t know the first thing about nursing…why me?’ He scoffed, but no one was around to hear him complaining.

‘A-ah! What happened! H-he’s…’
Nagito had been laid on the bed, unconscious, but coated in half-covered love bites, completely naked. Hajime blushed, but he didn’t have time to be embarrassed.
‘Look, Mikan, we were… well you can tell, but that's not the issue! He started spouting nonsense, I have no idea what he was saying but it made no sense, then his forehead grew very hot and he fainted! I know what it looks like, but we were already, well, done… So please, don’t tell anyone about that part, for him…’ As Hajime frantically rambled, Mikan just nodded, blushing.

‘Ah, I understand Hinata, I won’t t-tell anyone, but we need to get him to a h-hospital. I’ll keep your s-secret, I promise.’ She rushed forward, taking his temperature and started to dress him back in his clothes.
‘Please, can you fetch Nida- I mean, n-not him, I forgot… Who else… Ah! Souda and Tanaka will do, a-and tell them to bring Owari and Mioda to the hospital on the third island. You and I can bring K-komaeda… Is that o-okay?’
‘Got it!’ Hajime shouted, already out the door.
She’ll keep him safe and keep our secret. He’ll be fine, she’s the Ultimate nurse after all. He’ll be alright, I swore it.

…

‘Okay, so what is this?’
The three patients were at the hospital, Mikan watching over them. Hajime had wanted to stay by Nagito’s side all night, but Monokuma annoyingly pointed out the rules in the hospital lobby that only patients and one other overseer could stay in the hospital overnight. It was very late now, but the remaining students had met up at the restaurant to discuss what happened, and what to do from here.
‘It was me, Mikan, Ibuki, and Akane, we were all just sitting around talking. Then all of a sudden, Akane started crying, rambling about how scared she was, which was only weird cause a sec ago she was saying how it was all good. Don’t give me that look, Kaz, it was weird! Then Ibuki started believing everything she was saying, like to a tee. It made no sense, then they both collapsed on the floor, Mikan said it felt like they had fevers. What about you, Hajime? What happened with Nagito?’

Fuyuhiko, who was there when it all happened, was much more calm than Hajime, but he tried to keep a hold of himself, even though he was scared out of his wits.
‘Y-yeah! Basically, the exact same! We were pretty much just talking, and then he started weirdly not being able to tell the truth, like I asked him if he was struggling to not lie then he shook his head? I think that’s what was happening… Anyway, then his head got really hot and he fainted… that’s all I got.’
‘Pretty much just talking, huh?’ Hiyoko questioned, but she was smart enough to not make a joke at a time like this, so she kept it to herself.

‘So… It’s all the same thing, they were spouting some sorta nonsense, then got a fever and fainted…’ Kazuichi muttered.
‘How peculiar… Could this be the despair ridden disease the hellish rodent spoke of?’
‘The despair disease! That’s right, Gundham!’ Sonia gleamed, happy to get to the bottom of this, but her smile quickly dissipated. ‘Do you think we could question Monokuma about this?’
‘I hate it, but I think we might have to…’ Hajime frowned.

‘Yup! I’m beary knowledgeable in all things despair!’
There was a collective groan. Monokuma had appeared out of nowhere as usual, smiling as widely as ever.

‘That's the despair disease! Everyone had different symptoms. Nagito had liars disease, Ibuki had gullible disease and Akane has coward’s disease and so on…’

Liars disease, he meant to say… “Because it’s true”. Oh, Nagito… I hope you're okay.

‘Wait, how is that a motive?’ But Monokuma was already gone.
‘Shit, this is so confusing..’
‘Wait a minute, Hajime, Fuyuhiko, what if it's contagious?’ Kazuichi pointed out. Everyone stepped back from the two boys, except Chiaki, who didn’t seem to be paying much attention.
‘Chiaki, come, please.’ Sonia said with as little urgency as she could manage.
‘Ah, okay…’ She muttered, not looking up.
‘So… what do we do…?’ Hajime asked, frowning.
‘I propose that we quarantine you two and we all stay by the hospital in case of emergencies. That motel will do. You two, since you can’t stay in the hospital overnight, can sleep in your cottages I suppose. I’m sure Kazuichi can make a device to communicate between the two areas?’
‘Y-yes Miss Sonia, you can count on me!’
‘Alright, does that suit you all?’ She concluded with a smile.

Everyone agreed, and headed to the motel.
‘This sucks.’
‘Yup. But Mikan’s a good nurse, they'll be fine.’
‘You're right. We should go first thing in the morning and update the others on their condition. Kaz should be done with the device by then…’
‘Yeah… I guess there’s nothing else we can do…’ Hajime sighed. So, with despair leaking into their hearts, they sludged back to their cottages, dejected.

Nothing we can do, huh? No, that's stupid. I can at least be there for him. And, the girls I guess. I can’t just sit around. All I have to do is not fall asleep there, and I should be free to do as I please, right? Plus, Mikan’s probably worried, someone needs to tell her the plan.

So instead of sitting on his bed filled with anxiety, Hajime decided to get up and see Nagito. And the others, but Nagito was his first priority. He loved him, after all.

…

‘Nagito! You're okay!’
‘Hajime… I wish you weren’t here…’ Nagito let out a frown, obviously ashamed at what he was saying.
‘It’s okay Nagito, I know all you can do is lie. I’m happy to see you too.’ Nagito smiled widely.
‘Ah, I’m upset. I'm so glad I worried you, Hinata-kun.’
‘No, it’s alright. Worrying about you comes with the territory.’
‘The territory?’
‘O-of liking you, of course…’ Hajime blushed. Nagito followed suit.
‘Why are you here? You're supposed to be here, Mikan didn't mention it to me. She said it wasn't contagious.’
‘Well, if I was going to get it, I’m sure I would've got it already…’
‘That's wrong! You're so dumb! Yes, I mean you're an idiot! I mean-’
‘Its okay, I promise I understand.’ Hajime smiled, hand cupping Nagito’s cheek.
‘I'm not grateful for you coming at all, screw you.’
‘Ah..! Do you mean, thank you?’ Nagito shook his head, frowning. He was being tortured, having to say such cruel things to such a sweet boy who had come to visit him.
‘Right, of course. I wanted to see you, don’t worry about it.’
He’s so nice. Why hasn’t he grown tired of me yet?

‘So here’s the deal: Ibuki’s symptom is that she's highly gullible, if you told her I was a murderer, she would believe you, no hesitation.’ Nagito gasped, perishing the thought.
‘And Akane’s symptom is cowardice. If you saw her crying and scared, that’s why. I’m sure you've seen Mikan, she's taking care of you all, but that means no one else can stay here. Since me and Fuyuhiko were around you and the sick girls before we brought you here, we have to quarantine from everyone else. No, it's alright, it's no trouble, honest. Everyone else is staying at the motel down the road. Where is Mikan, anyway?’

‘Tsumiki-san is most definitely not in the on-call room, sleeping.’
‘Ah, I see. Do you mind if I stay with you, for a little bit, then?’ Hajime blushed, looking away in embarrassment. ‘I have to tell Mikan what’s happening anyway, so I’ll wait for her.’
‘She hasn't been checking on me at all, not even every hour.’
‘Okay, and when was the last time you saw her?’
‘More than 30 minutes ago.’
‘So less than, I see. Don’t be worried Nagito, see, I can understand you just fine!’ Hajime tried to smile as comforting as he could.
‘Hajime, why are you staying with me?’
‘Because I care about you. That's all.’

‘I hate you.’
‘I like you too. I’ll stay with you until Mikan comes. Don’t worry.’ he said with a big smile.

Hajime’s so oblivious. I didn't mean to say that, but still, in what world is hate the opposite of simply like? I could never tell him what I meant to say. It would make him feel disgusted, so thank goodness for this disease. I know he will leave me eventually, when he realises the true filth I am, but I can’t bear for him to leave me now. So I won’t share my feelings, it would only hurt him.

…

When Mikan finally did come, she caught the boys making out, and very firmly told them off, Though blushing. ‘I-I know you like each other, but you must keep your hands to yourselves!’ She said that they could have transferred the disease, but Hajime insisted he had no symptoms, and he was right. But she was adamant about being on the safe side, and very loudly said that he needed to be a patient too.

‘Mikan, seriously?’
‘A-And I’ve run out of rooms, so you’ll have to st-stay here. I’m s-sorry!’

Ah, she was trying to help.

‘i-if you don't have any symptoms by tomorrow, I’ll disch-charge you before Fuyuhiko comes to check on you.’

Hajime, in a very exaggerated, loud voice, said
‘Oh nooooo!!! That’s awful.’ But he smiled, and whispered: ‘Thank you Mikan.’
She whispered back: ‘I know you were worried about your boyfriend. And it's t-true, we don't know if the disease is um… s-sexually transferable…’
They both blushed.
‘Ah…., wait, boyfriend? I-I…’
‘Oh! I’m sorry, I-I didn't mean to make a fuss or make you feel bad, you ca-can hit me if you need to, I-I deserve it!’
‘No, Mikan it's fine, I promise. Thank you.’

She's so kind. But she’s right, I could still have it. Better to be safe than sorry, but she didn't have to let us stay together. If we acknowledge it out loud, Monokuma might come down on us.
‘That's that, then.’ Hajime turned to Nagito, smiling. ‘I guess I have to stay here.’
‘Yes, you must.’
‘I know I don't technically have to, but doctors orders!’ He winked, and Nagito blushed.

As they cuddled up next to each other, Nagito’s fever eased being held by Hajime, his thoughts started to consume him.

How did the disease even come to be? The patients don't exactly have anything in common. Plus, Nagito got it while he was with me, and I don't have it. Did Monokuma give it to him? If so, why him? Why Akane and Ibuki? And poor Mikan, I felt how hot she was when she brushed past, she must be getting ill from the stress of it all. Fuyuhiko, having to be isolated, too. I can’t be with Nagito the whole time, someone has to be there for him too. And Hiyoko, is anyone going to care for her? They all hate her, I don't like to think about the grief she feels of losing a lover. I don’t even want to imagine what would happen if… No, I mustn’t. Nothing is going to happen to him.

So as he let himself drift off to sleep, thinking of how to help all his friends, despite the anxiety, panic dread and despair he felt, he smiled. He truly believed that everything would be alright.

Wishful thinking.

Chapter Text

Part 8 - Chapter 3

Note: Pretend the device can reach the motel just this once, it's important to the plot. After this, the device works as it does in the game. I promise. Please forgive me 🙁

Hajime and Nagito had slept soundly together all night, with a few short breaks to make out, but that's all they did. It was like they couldn't keep their hands off each other, but they managed to resist. They enjoyed each other's embrace all night, whispering about their lives, their favourite foods, mostly trivial things.
However, Nagito told Hajime that his parents were dead, and that he had early onset dementia, but his luck was letting him live. It was a shock, and heartbreaking to hear, especially since he had to decode everything he was saying, as he was still stuck to lies. He hated such a wonderful boy who had to go through so much. Thank you for telling me. He had said, grateful he could open up so deeply. Hajime didn’t have any of his own deep tragic events to share, but he hoped his sympathy was enough. He truly cared for Nagito, and him in turn. They trusted each other, their bond only growing each day they spent together.

Mikan woke the boys up before Fuyuhiko came, with a quick checkup. Hajime continued to show no signs of the despair disease, and Nagito’s condition was unchanged, same with the girls. Kazuichi had finished the device, a communicator that showed video, its signal only reaching from the hospital to the music venue. Hajime left Nagito’s room, with a small secret kiss goodbye, and went to the lobby to meet with Fuyuhiko.

…

The device had been set up, and Fuyuhiko was talking to Kazuichi.
‘Yo, Hajime, where’ve you been?’
‘J-just… checking on the patients.’
‘Perfect, tell everyone any news, they've been dying to hear something.’
‘Hey, guys.’ Hajime leaned down to be eye level with the camera.
‘Hello, Hajime!’
‘Greetings.’
‘Hey, hey.’
‘Where’s Hiyoko?’
‘She won’t come out of her room, says she's freaked out by the disease’ Kazuichi stated, sighing. ‘But do you have news?’
‘Uh, not really. Mikan says everyone is unchanged. I’m sorry.’
A look of frustration flashed through everyone’s faces.
‘Great, what do we do now?’
‘Don’t stress guys, Mikans is working as hard as she can. They'll be better in no time.’
Hajime gave a hopeful smile. They agreed to keep doing what they were doing, hoping it would all end soon.
‘Wait, before you guys go, can someone pass the camera to Hiyoko? Please.’
‘I don’t know why’d you’d wanna talk to her, but sure…’ Kazuichi sighed. Hajime watched as the camera moved through the halls, towards a door, and he heard a knock.
‘What?’
‘Hey, Hiyoko, open up.’
‘I said no already, jeez…’
‘Its Hajime.’
Suddenly a door opened, only a crack.
‘Where?’
‘On the tablet.’
‘Gimme that!’ Hiyoko spat, snatching the device from his hands.
‘Hey! Ugh, you have to give that back y'know… geez, what I deal with…’ Hajime heard Kazuichi sigh, frustrated, but walked away.
‘You could be nicer to him, you know.’
‘Ugh, shut up. What do you want….?’
‘I just want to know if you're okay, the others said you weren’t leaving the room…’
‘Y-yeah… I’m-’ But she burst into tears, bawling her eyes out. As she dropped the tablet, Hajime saw her kimono backwards, bow crooked and completely unfolded. It was a mess.
‘Hiyoko, it’s okay! Just tell me what happened.’
‘No way, not now!’ He turned to see Fuyuhiko, spying behind him.
‘Dude! Sorry, but can you leave, this is embarrassing for her.’ he whispered.
‘Uh, oops… sorry.’ Fuyuhiko looked embarrassed to be caught, but left regardless.
‘I’m alone now, promise. You can tell me.’
Hiyoko just sniffled, but nodded.
‘F-fine. I- I can’t get my kimono on…’
‘That’s okay, I’m sure Sonia or Chiaki would hel-’
‘Mahiru taught me how! I’m supposed to know how!’ She shouted, tears streaming from her eyes. Oh, I see. She didn’t want to disgrace Mahiru, in a way. He supposed by not knowing, she was calling her a bad teacher.
‘Oh, Hiyoko…’
‘Don’t… don’t look at me like that.’ She spat.
‘Its okay Hiyoko, I understand. It sucks, I know, but you're not disgracing her by not using her teachings. I knew her too, and she would understand, I promise. She was kind. She wouldn’t be mad if you asked for help. I know I will never be able to speak for her, but I truly believe that she would be proud of you for even being able to tell me… so please, it's alright, don’t cry…’ Hajime spoke softly, trying to calm her down. Damn it, I should be there for her, not stuck here. I need to get her to open up to someone else, or she'll kill herself with grief alone in that motel room…
‘Look, I would help you myself, but I’m clueless about these things. You can ask Sonia, I promise she’ll have advice.’
‘You sure promise a lot of things…’ She muttered, sniffling. ‘Alright, I’ll… I’ll ask. I’m gonna leave the device by my door and call for her later. And… Thank you, Hajime…’ She quickly hung up, embarrassed by her own sincerity, but Hajime smiled. She’s getting better, I’m so happy. I really hope she does get help. She deserves it, I believe that, even if no one else does.

…

The day went by very slowly, without news. Hajime tried to resist the urge to visit Nagito, letting him rest, and hung out with Fuyuhiko all day. They were quite gloomy, but their company cheered each other up. It was hard, not knowing what was happening, but having a friend around really helped. Having a friend on the island was priceless, someone you could trust… I could tell him about me and Nagito… But he decided too many people already knew, plus, the sneaking around was quite fun… Still, Fuyuhiko was a good friend, and Hajime was grateful. They talked about the despair disease, and why they didn't have it.
It was peculiar that they had been in contact with it but not gotten it. It had to have been chosen, specifically to those people. They discussed possibilities for hours, but couldn’t find a solution. Monokuma was truly a mystery, it was hard to believe he was even capable of organising a killing game in the first place. Still, talking it out definitely helped. They weren't really, but they felt one step closer to figuring out how to get off this island.

As the sun went down, he couldn't really get away with staying with Nagito again, so he sadly only visited him once. He was sleeping, sweating profusely, obviously in pain. Hajime hated to see him like this, but at least he was safe. He was satisfied, and with a quick peck on the forehead, left to go to bed. He could sleep soundly knowing Nagito was alright.

However, that night would be the last night in a while that Hajime would sleep soundly…

…

Hajime had got up with the Monokuma announcement, and headed to the hospital. Fuyuhiko wasn’t there yet, so he looked at the monitor before planning to check on Nagito, however, he would never get the chance.
On the monitor was one light, flickering. A candle, it seemed like. A lone stepladder stood in the middle of a stage. Stage… The music venue…? That makes sense, I guess, but what are they up to? Suddenly, he saw someone walk up to the stepladder, and hang a noose…
Fuck, what?! They were in a hospital gown, bag on their head… a patient… No, not… Small figure, he could make out it was one of the girls… Not him, thank goodness, but one of my friends… They're going to… NO! I can’t let this happen!
So Hajime sprinted out of the hospital, booking it to the venue.

…

He pushed the double doors open with all his might, out of breath. As he rushed in, it was so dark. He let his eyes adjust to the space, and noticed the stage. A stepladder, a large black curtain, and… There he saw a body hanging from a noose.

‘NO!’… Not again… Not one of my friends… He slumped to the floor, head in his hands…
‘I have to… I have to get help!’
No, no, no, not one of my friends… Please, maybe someone can get them down, maybe… I have to find someone, anyone!
As he sprinted to the motel, he found Fuyuhiko and Mikan running towards the hospital.
‘Hajime? What's wrong?’
‘S-someone… In the… Music venue!’
‘N-no… could it be..?’
‘What?!’
‘Mioda-san is missing, I-I was… looking for her…’
Shit!
‘Quickly!’

As they booked it back to the music venue, they ran into Chiaki, and grabbed her too, explaining on the way. She didn’t dare protest. They tried to open the door, but it wasn’t budging.
‘Shit, it just opened when I was here 10 minutes ago!!’
‘It's the killer, has to be… There’s no way its a suicide if someone locked the door afterwards.’ Fuyuhiko grumbled.
‘We can worry about that during the investigation, now we need to break this door down.’
So they slammed into the door with all their might, and it opened surprisingly easily after that.
What they saw was indeed the hung body, but something else, too…

‘NO! H-HIYOKO!’
There she was, Hiyoko Saionji, The Ultimate Traditional Dancer, tied to a pole with duct tape, sliced up. Hajime cared for her deeply, he wanted to be there for her. He was helping her be a better person, and to get through the grief… She was trying to be better.

‘Fuck, she was trying to be better!’
The pained scream ran out, deafening. ‘She wasn’t perfect, but she didn’t deserve this!’ Hot tears streamed down his face, head in his hands again. Despair, despair, despair. The worst feeling imaginable.

A jolly ding ran out through the music venue, and a sickly laugh echoed: ‘A body has been discovered! After a certain amount of time has passed, a class trial will begin.’

They were going to have to do this all over again.

Shit.

Chapter Text

Part 9 - Chapter 3

It was trial hour. Nagito and Akane had miraculously recovered from the despair disease, Monokuma claiming it had “done its job”. It was confusing, but Nagito was relieved to not be in pain anymore. As he got woken up by Sonia, she explained some things he had missed during the investigation before they walked to the trial. There were two victims this time around, Ibuki Mioda and Hiyoko Saionji. They were both found in the music venue, but no one knew precisely when and where they were killed. Everyone was quite worried, but Chiaki had done some thorough investigating, which was out of character for her, but she claimed that “someone had to do it.” He found himself not too bothered about these circumstances, relieved Hajime was alive. But Sonia still had some bad news regarding that front.

The person who normally took charge of these situations, was in a very bad state. Hajime, who had cared for Hiyoko, had been out of action for a couple of hours, with what could only be described as a panic attack. Nagito hated to hear this, but apparently Fuyuhiko was with him, and he knew that they would take care of each other. Fuyuhiko had started to refer to them as brothers after all. It was horrible, Nagito thought, that initially he was grateful for the hope that would come from this despair, when it made his dear Hajime so miserable. No amount of hope could be worth that. he thought. I need to talk to him. Hiyoko needs him. I need him.

…

‘Hajime!’ He had been walking on his own, if a bit wobbly, across the central island, in which he ran into the person he really needed to see. Just his luck, he supposed.
‘Nagito? You’re okay?’
‘You should not care at all about me, are you okay?’
Hajime was shaking, eyes red and cheeks puffed from crying, voice hoarse from screaming. He couldn’t answer before falling into a hug. No one was around right this second, so Nagito squeezed him back, kissing him on the forehead.
‘Hajime, I know it's hard, but I’m here for you, if that means anything...’
‘It means everything.’ He whispered, and despite the situation, Nagito couldn't help but smile.
‘It’s not my place to say it, but it's my opinion that Hiyoko is out there somewhere, hoping you find her justice. What do you say, do you think you can help? Chiaki investigated for you. We all need you, you are our best symbol of hope. Everyone cares for you, and everyone trusts you the most. They believe in you the most…’ He asked delicately. It was a lot, true, but Hajime was the best at taking charge and deducing things. He was headstrong, everyone believed in him. I believe in him.

‘You really… Think so?’
‘Yes, Hajime. I really do.’
‘Then… I can- I can do it… for her. If you're there with me.’ He whispered softly, squeezing Nagito tight.
‘Always.’
Nagito could only hope that justice could be found, and that it could fulfil Hajime, even if just a little.

And so the trial began.

…

Before everyone settled into their routine arguments, they noted that Nekomaru was not present, but his portrait had not been covered with a crude cross through it. The students silently hoped that meant he would be okay, but for now, they had other priorities. To find the killer.

To say it was a difficult trail was an understatement. Hajime had to step up, and push through his grief. He did so expertly, to everyone’s surprise, trying to judge alibis and clues unbiased. He hated to admit, but he started to get used to these class trials, so his instincts kicked in. There were many clues Chiaki found for him, paper on the pillar that Hiyoko was taped to, a strange sticky glue found on the door, which ruled out a suicide… It even turned out it was supposed to be an imitation murder, from the movie Hajime and Nagito had watched together. It almost convinced everyone Hajime could have done it, since he had watched said movie and was the only one who saw the hanging video in the hospital, if not for his violently despairful reaction to the killings. It was a close one, and tough to navigate for sure, but seeing Nagito safe and sound, nodding along to his revelations, it eased his mind and made him feel more determined to show everyone that he could do it: that he could find the killer.

After a lot of arguments back and forth, they found an important fact: It turned out the video that had been shown to him was not filmed in the music venue, but in the hospital. That clue, along with the autopsy reports that couldn't possibly be true, there was only one viable culprit. He hated that he was able to come to this conclusion, that he could even fathom it could be her. But it had to be her. She was the only one.

When Hajime’s eyes locked on her, he knew he had to announce it. It only made sense. But, why Ibuki? Why… Hiyoko…? This girl, she was so kind, helping him and Nagito with their secret, nursing him to health, so considerate… This girl, this petite, soft, warm girl, had murdered his friends.

He had to tell everyone it was Mikan. He had to announce the evidence, show why he came to that conclusion. He had to do this logically, properly. But as he saw the girl, sweating and terrified as he came closer to the truth, squeaking cutely, acting like she hadn't killed his friends, like she hadn’t killed Hiyoko’s chance to be a better person. Killed Ibuki’s dreams of performing her own acts. Their dreams of getting off this island. Everyone’s dreams of never having to live through another horrible class trial.

As he made this realisation, Hajime knew he had to be calm. But he wasn’t.

‘Mikan. You… You Bitch!’ He screamed, leaving his stand, sprinting to her place and slapping her across the face, as hard as he could. She stumbled backward onto her rear, clutching the now red mark she wore on her face. He was seething with rage. He had killed her own patient, someone who trusted her. And she killed Hajime’s friend. She killed. She murdered. There was a collective gasp, Hajime had moved so fast that no one saw him leave his stand until he was standing there, breathing heavily, seething.

‘Why… Ibuki, Hiyoko…. WHY?!’ He screamed in her face, and as he raised his fist in a fit of rage, ready to beat the truth out of her, he found himself unable to, but not out of his own volition.
‘Haj- Hinata-kun, please… I know how you feel, but…this is not wise.’ Nagito rushed in, out of breath, grabbing Hajime’s wrist.
As she lay there on the floor, tears welling in her eyes, her face started to distort into a devilish smile, before she started to giggle, creepily. She started to shake, clutching her sides. It was as if she was vibrating, like a delicate, intricate bomb, ready to burst at the seams if anyone made a single sound, if just a pin dropped on that horrid trial floor. As everyone looked on in shock, no one could predict what she would say next.

‘Hah… HahaHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHA!!!!’
Mikan was lying there on the floor, deranged laugh echoing through the trial hall.
‘You, you… IDIOTS. You’re all forgiving him for slapping a poor innocent girl, but… but you won’t forgive me?! Hypocrites, hypocrites, all of you! Why? Why won’t you forgive me?!’

She was still crouched on the floor, but her face was twitching with rage. No one could believe what this normally soft spoken girl was spouting.

‘Innocent? You ASSHOLE!’ Hajime yelled, resisting Nagito’s hold on him.
‘You killed them! For no good reason!’

‘No good reason… Ha! Ha! You’re an idiot. Don’t you see, I'm doing this for my love.’

What…? Everyone looked on in horror.

‘You must understand, I was only doing what my beloved would have wanted. That damn despair disease… It wasn’t a disease… It made me remember… remember my beloved.’
Everyone wanted to ask questions, to ask what the hell she was talking about, but no one could protest, it was too shocking, too confusing… So they listened.

‘You have to understand, don’t you? If your stupid weak little boyfriend over there asked you to kill me, you’d do it, in the blink of an eye. You would, don’t lie to me! SO WHY, WHY WHY WHY won't you FORGIVE ME ALREADY!!!!!!!!’

She was clutching her whole body, shaking, crying and screaming. It didn’t make any sense.
What happened to the Mikan we knew? The soft spoken nurse, who stuttered, who was clumsy, who was sweet. Kind. This girl standing before them was not kind anymore.

‘I didn’t even mean to kill that pig-mouthed girl! She just got in my way… It wasn’t my fault!’

Hajime suddenly looked up, rage flashing in his eyes. Nagito couldn’t contain him anymore. He broke free of his restraints, bellowing to Mikan, grabbing her hair, pulling her up to look him in the eyes. He scanned her eyes, looking for any sign of humour, any speck of a lie, but he found none.

‘You… You mean… You killed her, you KILLED her… For no fucking reason?!’

‘I think that’s enough. As much as I enjoy your little squabble, I think it’s voting time! Whaddaya say folks? Will you make the right choice, or the deadly wrong one!’

‘W-wait a goddamn second-’

‘It’s Voting Time!’

Before he knew it, Monokuma had dragged Hajime to his stand, a screen propped up before him. He had to vote, he just had to. He didn’t hesitate, smashing the icon of Mikan’s face, with more force than he needed to. He seethed with rage, the vein on his forehead almost popping out, hands sweating, eyes welling with tears of frustration.

She had the remembering disease. What did that mean? What did she forget, just her so-called “beloved”, or something more? Who was this beloved, and why did Mikan feel this guy would have wanted her to murder her friends? How much of this blame could be placed on this guy? He wanted to say: all of it. That the Mikan he came to know was the real Mikan, the Mikan on the other side of the hall who was giggling, blushing and drooling thinking about this beloved, she wasn’t the real Mikan. He hoped, prayed, that this Mikan wasn’t real. But he had to admit, there was a sincerity to her words. He didn’t want to, but he had to. If he lived in denial, if he couldn’t blame her for her own horrible actions, Hiyoko would be so mad. Hajime chuckled, thinking about the lecture he would get for trying to see the good. She would call Mikan a pig, or stupid, or a bitch, and for once Hajime wouldn’t tell her off. He missed his opportunity to ever gossip about someone with her, or agree with her insults. He missed that opportunity, even if he would never actually do it. He missed her. She was gone.

Because of Mikan.

So he didn’t try to justify her actions anymore, he couldn’t. Mikan killed his friends. That had to be all there was to it, for his own sanity. So he smiled at his vote, happy with his decision, because he was right. Monokuma announced that everyone had voted correctly, and that she would be punished. He couldn’t wait to leave this hall, but he had to watch Mikan’s execution, so Hiyoko could laugh, wherever she was. She could laugh that her killer hadn’t gotten away with it. She could be happy, wherever she was, with Mahiru, and Peko, Byakuya, Ibuki, even Teruteru.

As he watched his former friend be executed, he smiled. He would be okay. Because he found justice, like she would have wanted him to do. It would be hard, but he could be happy about that, at least.

Chapter Text

Part 10 - Chapter 4

‘Hey’

The trial had ended, and no one had spoken a word to each other since Monokuma had announced: ‘It’s punishment time!’
Everyone looked on in horror as another classmate was executed in a gruesome way. There were gasps, some cries, but no one spoke. Fuyuhiko had held Hajime’s shoulder, and given him a smile that said he was sorry, that he hoped he was okay. Everyone could see that Hajime was the most distraught, and Fuyuhiko was trying to be there for his friend as best he could. But no words. They had all left the trial ground, gone down that accursed escalator, not saying a word. They moped back to their cottages, some people going in alone, some with friends. Their air was heavy with grief, everyone silent in their thoughts. There was just too much to think about.

But as Hajime led Nagito to his own cottage, he greeted Nagito with a sad smile.
‘Are you alright, Hajime?’ He asked, face racked with guilt.
He couldn't believe he had been sad Mikan hadn’t asked him to help with her murderous plot, even if for a moment. He didn't want to feel that way anymore, not for himself, but for Hajime. He knew he shouldn’t wish for despair, not now, even if the despair did bring out greater hope. Because he couldn’t bear to see Hajime’s face, as it was.

Hajime was leaned against the door of his cottage, that same door they had done some- well… Nagito tried his best not to think about that, lest his cheeks show his embarrassment. His eyes were wet with uncried tears, arms shaking like he had been holding something in. He needed something, but Nagito didn’t know what. But he wasn’t answering his question, and he didn’t want to do the wrong thing, so he sat himself on Hajime’s all-too-familiar bed, nervously fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

Hajme let his question hang in the air, as he followed suit and sat next to him, cupping his head between Nagito’s collarbone and jaw. That question, four words: ‘Are you alright, Hajime?’ made his chest tight. He knew it was a simple question, but he didn’t know the answer. Ibuki, Hiyoko, they would know. If he asked them, they would answer without missing a beat. But he couldn’t ask them, he never could.

‘I don’t think I am.’

A pause.

‘That’s alright, Hajime. Is there anything I can do?’

He was already doing so much. He was the only one who could understand that. Nagito Komaeda was what he needed. The hand that he found was caressing his spiky brown hair was what he needed. Who was this boy, making him feel so inexplicably good, even when tragedy had struck only a few hours ago?

‘Stay with me.’

‘That… That would be wonderful.’

…

‘Hajime, you’re still awake.’

They had been lying in bed together, Hajime’s head continued to rest between Nagito's collarbone and jaw, hand holding his waist, and Nagito caressing his hair. The Monokuma announcement had gone off, but they didn’t really care. Everyone was going to find out eventually, but right now, Hajime needed company and there was no way in hell he wasn’t getting it. They hadn’t said anything, not really aware of how long it had been, but they enjoyed themselves, Hajime listening to Nagito’s heartbeat, feeling it rise every time Hajime smiled at him, or cupped his face in his hands. Despite them not really doing much, he was having fun. As Nagito’s nimble fingers ruffled Hajime’s hair in a way that made him let out a small purr, he was getting tired, but there was too much on his mind, too much he needed to say. But he enjoyed the strokes, enjoyed watching Nagito’s heartbeat rise and fall, enjoyed his company too much to really say what he needed to say. So he was stuck in a limbo of relaxing enough to get sleepy, but not letting himself calm down from the day’s events. He would say what he needed to, in a minute. In a minute, he kept telling himself, after I rub his waist and feel his heart beat faster again, after - But as Nagito’s words snapped him out of his bliss, all of the memories he was avoiding came back to him.

‘I’m scared.’

‘Of what, if it’s okay to ask?’

‘Of- of not being a good friend, of not… Being headstrong like you said, enough to keep everyone confident. Of not keeping Hiyoko’s memory, of not making her proud.’

‘Hajime, you-’

‘Of never getting off this island.’

A pregnant pause. Nagito had been enjoying himself too, up until this moment. He had every hope that they would be able to get off this island, but Hajime’s fear was all too justified, all too realised. Nagito’s faith in his classmates was grand, but the chance of more of his classmates dying in the process was grander. Normally, he would be okay with that, he would even be okay in sacrificing himself. He didn’t want to admit it, but he knew Hajime wouldn’t allow that, not anymore. He was too kind, too sweet, too caring to let Nagito die, no matter how little weight his life really held in the grand scheme of things. He knew being in this situation at all, getting to hold Hajime, was so lucky, and he knew his luck was bound to run out soon. But he wouldn’t let it affect Hajime. He couldn’t. He knew, a month ago, he wouldn’t mind. He knew a month ago, he had nothing to live for, no one he could possibly care about. But it wasn’t a month ago, it was now, and this gorgeous boy was in his arms, and he was scared, and he was looking for comfort, from Nagito Komaeda, the piece of filth, of all people.

He mustn’t fail. They would get off the island, and they would go on the date Hajime had mentioned, if he was still up for it. Nagito assumed he had forgotten about that now, an empty promise, but he hoped from the bottom of his heart that wasn’t true, as embarrassing as it was to admit.

‘I believe we will.’
‘I know you do, but…’

‘Hajime. Listen to me. I know it’s not my place, but you must have hope. If it counts for anything, which I sincerely wish it does, I believe in you. I would like to get off this island, and I believe you will be the one to do it.’

Hajime looked up, their eyes meeting.

‘I-I don’t exactly know what will happen when we leave, but if you decide not to discard me, I promise to be there when we get out. It would please me greatly, if… i-if we could…’

The boy leaned up from off his chest, staring in anticipation.

‘You could have things to look forward to, if you wish. So, we must get off this island. So… you can do what you may want to do.’

He blushed, not quite managing to say what he wanted to. He wanted to date Hajime, yes, that much was obvious. But he didn’t expect the feeling to be mutual. This was a fling, a one time thing. A phase, that would end when Hajime had more people to choose from. People that weren’t filth, that weren’t disgusting, that weren't him.

‘You mean… go on that date?’ Hajime whispered, no smile creeping on his lips, but anticipation, and what seemed like hope. Nagito would deny this, but he could recognise hope anywhere. His cheeks turned pink, and he simply nodded, averting his eyes. He was wrong, and he had never felt more relieved.

‘O-only if you still wanted to, of course!’ Hajime stuttered, cheeks turning an endearing shade of rose.

‘T-that would please me greatly, y-yes…’

‘How do you say that with a straight face…?’ Hajime chuckled, leaning back into his chest.

‘I am just… enjoying not having to lie. It was torturous, cursing at you…’

‘Who knew the opposite of "thank you" was “screw you”?’ Hajime laughed, fiddling with the hem of Nagito’s shirt. It was very amusing, when Nagito was cursing profanities at him, but he remembered how much pain he was in, his high fever, his shivering, and a twinge of guilt settled in.
‘I… I’m sorry that happened to you.’

‘It’s alright, you seemed to understand me just fine. And I’ve been in worse pain.’ He pondered, recalling his own illnesses. ‘But I assure you, I am okay now.’

Hajime sat up, placed his hand between the unruly white locks of hair before him, and smiled. Before, he wouldn’t dream of being in an intimate position such as this, and not feeling embarrassed, or scared. He wouldn’t dream of letting himself be so vulnerable, yet so confident at the same time. And he wouldn't have dreamed of believing Nagito when he said he was okay. Nagito was a mystery to him, when he first arrived on this island. He was anything but self-sufficient, anything but happy. Anything but okay. But he was okay, he was smiling alongside him, safe.

He had made Nagito laugh, he had made Nagito purr, he had made Nagito scream with pleasure, all things that would have seemed ridiculous when they had first met. But he wasn't ending every sentence with a miserable remark, every suggestion with a twinge of guilt for even daring. Every line with an insult to himself. He had changed, he was okay.

‘You’re really okay, you mean it?’
‘Yes, truly. I do. That is only thanks to you.’ he continued. ‘I know I was what could be only described as unbearable, before you convinced me to apologise. I would never have even dreamed of it, if it weren’t for yourself, Hajime.

‘That’s not true at all Nagito! You were always a good person, deep down. Even without your friends, or me, you would have eventually shown it.’

‘Hajime, you know that’s not true. It was you, who brought out the best in me. I am very grateful to you, so much so, I… I can’t fully find the words…’

‘Then… don’t speak.’

Hajime leaned forward, letting their lips intertwine. There was no shock or confusion now, each other's lips a familiar place. But this kiss was not familiar. There was no sign of hunger, or longing for more. This kiss… was deep, and wonderful, yes. But there were no undertones of sex, or fooling around. It was completely and wholly, a kiss. There was no motion, or tongue, but they held each other in their arms, Hajime caressing white locks, Nagito holding a tannish waistline. They stayed like that for what felt like eternity, not moving from that position, not wanting to let go, but not needing more.

This wasn’t a fling. They weren’t each other's booty call, each other's hookup. It was more than that. It wasn’t like the sex didn’t mean anything, of course. But it was deeper than that, more important. They knew that technically, they could get sex from anyone, but this? This feeling, this familiarity, this kiss. This specific kiss, the way they held each other, the way they felt fulfilled when they were with each other…

Hajime had never had sex before this island. It was embarrassing to admit, but it was true. He knew of it, and he knew what it was supposed to be like. He had friends who described it to him, and the internet of course. His expectations were quite low, if he was honest. His idea of sex was just to feel pleasure, maybe a couple times, then move on. It wasn’t anything deeper than that. But with Nagito? When they had sex, he felt connected to him. Like his body reacted in ways it did with no one else. Like his body belonged to Nagito. Like they had their own special way of communicating, that only they knew. Like it made them connected in mind, body and soul. He supposed… that his friends had never been in love. Maybe, that was the difference. Maybe… That was why it was so special. Maybe that was why this kiss was different. Because he knew they didn't need to go all the way to feel this connection. Because he trusted Nagito with all his heart. He trusted that he would enjoy every mannerism, every reaction, every habit. He at least enjoyed that about Nagito.

‘I love you.’

Fuck, he did not mean to say that. He was just thinking about Nagito’s giggle, how much he enjoyed it. His hair, the unruliness of it all. The way they held each other, and how much he loved it. They was he loved every inch of him. Love, love, love, that word was repeating in his mind, so wonderfully, that it must have slipped out. Shit. This was not the time. They had more important things to do, and this feeling, this love would only complicate it. They needed to survive this killing game, they needed to get off this island. Hajime needed to protect Nagito. If Monokuma knew how he felt, he would surely use it against him. He would hold Nagito inches away from him, he would torture him, he would…

He would use Nagito to make him feel despair.
This was so unfair, because Nagito probably didn’t even love him back. This was so selfish, he was going to make him suffer so greatly, for what? Because he was weak? Because he let himself get too confident? Because of the love he felt, they would both feel so much despair.

Hajime was shaking. His eyes were welling with tears. He was terrified.

Nagito had been enjoying this kiss, too. He was enjoying the petting of his hair, and the calmness of the air. Then, to top it all off, Hajime had said those words. He didn’t even realise how much he longed to hear them, until he did. It filled him with bliss, a rush of pleasure filled him. Was this true hope? He was so lucky, having Hajime of all people, love Nagito, the filth he was. He wanted to deny it. Who could ever love him? But above all, he trusted Hajime, trusted him with his life. So he must be telling the truth, at least a little. So he tried to push his fears aside. He was so, so happy. He smiled, pulling away to look at this wonderful boy who apparently could love him.

But Hajime was shaking. He was crying.

Nagito’s joy faded without a second of hesitation. Of course he didn’t mean it. The words disgusted him, of course they did. He was just trying to make Nagito happy, but of course the notion of loving someone like him disgusted him so much he had to cry. Hajime looked like he was going to be sick, if he was honest. How could he let himself be fooled so greatly? Why on earth would Hajime ever love someone as filthy and disgusting as him?

‘Hajime, I understand. Please, don’t cry. I will take my leave now.’

‘N-no! Please, wait. I’m sorry, I’m sorry… I…I’m sorry. Just, forget what I said.’

‘Of course. I understand. I will see you at breakfast tomorrow, Hinata-kun.’

As Nagito left the cottage and returned to his own, returned to the honorific that meant they were only classmates, and nothing more: little did they know… that they would have the exact same tears flowing, with the exact same thought.

“Of course he doesn’t love me. Why on Earth would he?”

Chapter Text

Part 11 - Chapter 4

The sun had risen as it always had. No clouds, once again. No sign of imperfection, or even difference. Hajime scoffed at the beam of light raging though his half-opened curtains. Who did the sun think it was, acting all high and mighty? Did it not realise the hell that we’re going through, just acting all perfect and warm and clear and…? But Hajime was scolding something that couldn’t possibly hear.

His bed was lonely for the first night in a while, his unconscious self trying to grab hold of something, or someone that wasn't there, something familiar… He had cried himself to sleep, his eyes lined with red from his puffy skin. He felt heavy, and weak. What was that?

Hajime Hinata was angry. He was angry at a lot of things, but he didn’t know where to start. He needed to scream them, somewhere, somehow. But one of the things he was angry at was Monokuma, and he didn’t want to risk him hearing, and using it against him. So he dragged himself out of his bed and onto his desk, happy to be away from the emptiness of it all; picked up a pen and notebook that he had been supplied with, but hadn’t touched till now, and started off the list strong.

1. Monokuma.
Stupid bitch who listens to everything i effing say. Can't even talk to myself without him butting in… stupid fucking puhuhu and tee hees and hope he dies
2. No privacy cause mONOKUMA fuck

He crossed out his writings angrily, and decided to just start again, crumpling his paper and throwing it to the floor. He really needed to do this, since he couldn’t speak aloud to anyone. So he tried to calm himself for a moment, and put his pen to paper.

1. Monokuma cause he eavesdrops and doesnt give me privacy and he interrupted me whe

Don't think about that, Hajime.

2. Monokuma cause hes evil and has the capacity to ruin all our lives / he already has
Mikan cause she killed my friends for no reason nono

He crossed his last sentence out again, growing ever more frustrated with himself.

3. Mikan cause someone made her kill my friends. It might of been someone elses fault but she still did. hiyoko
4. hiyoko cause she died before she got better

Hajime decided to try his best to not cross that one out, as much as he wanted to ignore it.

5. This stupid island for being so perfect all the time
6. MoNOKUMA cause i have to write a FREAKING diary cause if i talk out loud hell use it against me FUCK HIS STUPID FUCKING laugh and monotone ass and bellybutton that looks like a fucking pimple
He paused, his thoughts welling suddenly, like a tornado. He couldn’t keep ignoring it.

7. Me cause i told nagito i

He couldn’t even write it down. He stared down at the paper, watching as it started to rain? No, there were angry tears welling from his eyes, that he didn't even notice were there. That was the biggest threat, the biggest weakness he had, wasn't it? Because he loved Nagito, and because he told him out loud, everything was at risk, and he knew that. He hated that he said anything, because Monokuma would, not might, would- use this against him. Hurt Nagito. And Nagito didn’t even love him back, so it just wouldn’t be fair. When did he get so weak? He supposed the answer was obvious. Hajime had finally come to terms with him falling in love, only to have the notion of ever fulfilling it ripped away. Because this wasn’t high school, or normal daily life. This was a killing game, a massacre where he had to hide his intentions, not trust people blindly, like Mikan… Not stupidly say his deepest feelings out loud and put the one he only just started to hold so dearly to his heart in immense danger.

He knew he had to get a different thought out of his head, anything, but it repeated over and over like a mantra. He heard Nagito’s voice in his head, reaching out for him.

‘Hinata-kun, why would you say that?’

‘Nagito! I’m… I-I’m sorry!’

‘Hinata-kun, you don’t belong here, you never have. You're an idiot.’

‘N-no, please! Nagito!’

‘Why would I ever love you, now that you’ve signed my death warrant.’

Nagito was standing before him, immensely huge, glowing. He was an angel, gorgeous, a perfect figure of comfort, and he wanted to hold him, but he was out of reach. He was above him, figuratively and literally, spitting in his face.

‘Hinata-kun, you’re going to kill me, you must know that.’
‘Hinata-kun, you’ve killed me.’
‘Hinata-kun, Monokuma will use me against you’
‘Hinata-kun, I didn’t do anything to deserve this. I didn’t even love you’

He scoffed, chuckling dryly.

‘Nagito, wait, please! I didn’t mean to!’
His own throat was choking him, his eyes watering with frustration, pulling his limbs so far out trying to reach out for the boy he cherished. But it wasn’t working, nothing was. He was useless.

‘You never do, do you. You're nothing. How did you ever get so confident, just because I praised you a little, just because I let you touch me, just because you believed you were important to these people? Pathetic.’

His image of Nagito let out a raspy laugh, the same one he only used when he seemed to be in immense pain. The same he let out when he was filled with despair.

Hajime had collapsed to the floor, clutching his head in his hands. He was shaking, crying, struggling to breathe. Each raspy breath let out another tear, his breaths getting faster, his heart beating out of his chest.

Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault Nagito was going to die, it was his fault-

He was consumed, and he couldn't breathe. He was so out of his depth here, he wasn't a leader, he wasn't headstrong. He was going to kill -

He was so consumed by his thoughts he didn't feel hands clutching his shoulders, pulling him out.

‘Dude - can you- Hajime! Breathe- what happ- breathe!’

He tried to grab onto the voice, but he couldn't focus, and his eyes were squeezed shut, as if something would get in if he opened them. But he tried, because the voice sounded desperate.

‘Hajime, you're having - panic - follow my breaths, follow, in, out, in -...’

He tried his best to do as he was told, focusing on this voice. He tried to breath to the voice’s command, tried to stop thinking about -

‘Hajime, look at me! In, out, in…’

He finally managed to open his eyes, and it was his friend, his only true friend, his best friend, his so-called “soul brother”, someone he could trust. Finally, someone he could trust. He wasn't alone. He could relax. He found that his neck had released the hold it had over him.

As he calmed, he found himself no longer crouched on the hardwood floor, but on his own bed, pulled into a hug.

‘Fuyuhiko…’

‘Dude, are you okay? You freaked me out for a sec…’

As he realised how vulnerable he must have been, his cheeks grew pink, and he pulled away from the embrace, averting his eyes, embarrassed.

‘Uh… I’m… fine, Hiko.’ Fuyuhiko raised an eyebrow in playful defiance. ‘Okay, I wasn't, but I am now. T-thanks…’

His friend shook his head, exasperated.

‘Hajime, it's cool, but what happened? You're really late for breakfast.’

Huh? He hadn’t heard the Monokuma announcement… How long had he been on the floor?

‘I… am?’

‘Yeah dude, we were worried. Look, you don’t have to come, but I just wanted to know you're okay. We all care about you, y’know? I’m just gonna tell Kaz you're all good, then i'm coming right back, ‘kay?’

‘You don’t have to…’

‘Right back.’ He interrupted, adamant.

…

Hajime couldn't tell if it had been minutes or hours, but before he knew it, Fuyuhiko was back. He hadn’t moved from his position, but it didn’t seem to phase his friend, so he assumed it hadn’t been too long.

‘Look, I wasn’t gonna ask, ‘cause you're obviously gonna be upset about… her. But you were in really bad shape when I found you, and something tells me that's not the whole story.’

Hajime winced as Fuyuhiko placed his hand on his shoulder, but did not shy away.

‘Dude, you can tell me anything. I won’t spill, I got your back, Hajime.’

‘I...’

Hajime wanted to tell someone, anyone, and he assumed Fuyuhiko would be his best bet. He didn’t want to burden him, but this secret was eating away at him from the inside, and he trusted Fuyuhiko. They were friends.

‘We can’t speak, here:’

Hajime grabbed his notebook, and climbed under the bed.

‘D-dude? What the hell are you doing?!’ Fuyuhiko gasped, wondering if his friend had gone mad.

‘Just come down here and I’ll explain!’ Hajime whisper-shouted, a warmness reaching his cheeks. Okay, he knew how this looked, but he wasn't insane.

As he waited for Fuyuhiko to climb down, he started to write:

“I cant just speak freely, monokuma will hear. the cameras cant possibly reach here either. Just trust me hiko.”

He passed the notebook to his now very dusty friend, who frowned, but nodded, taking the pen.

“ur freaking me out dud e what the heck is it!!!!!” He scribbled, his handwriting being more scrawl-y than he expected.

“look just dont freak but” A pause, his pen hovering, “ me and nagito are kinda”

He didn’t really know how to word it, and he looped the last a while he tried to think of the phrase he was looking for, but Fuyuhiko snatched the pen.

“dude ik!!! its cool. wut abt him???????!” Hajime blushed, and looked next to him. He was giving him a small smirk, but there was still confusion in his eyes.

“well i told him i Lo” He didn’t get to finish the sentence before Fuyuhiko very audibly gasped. Hajime’s cheeks flushed an even deeper red, freckles disappearing from his face. “Like out loud.”

Fuyuhiko just let his jaw hang wide, but closed it as soon as Hajime noticed. He didn’t take the pen this time, just nodded in anticipation.

“but like he totally just ran away and i can't blame him and monokumas gonna use it against me and he's gonna hurt him to get to me now he kno-”

Fuyuhiko snatched the pen from him, stopping his rambling writings. He muttered ‘Jeez, dude.’ But nothing more aloud.

“I get it bro. Im sry. I wanna say itll be all good but… i think back to her… im sure monokunt knew how i felt abt “
A pause.
“nd he made her execution so i could run in on purpose. cause he knew i would. Im sure of it. Im sure that just how evil he is. “

Fuyuhiko handed him the pen.

“Im so sorry hiko, i had no idea. I mean, i kinda did, but still im so” -snatch-

“Dont be!!!! its fine. Its hard but im getting over it. u r helping me with that. But this aint abt me” -snatch-

“Hiko im ur friend!!! U should tell me abt” -snatch-

“Like u told me abt nagito???” A less desperate snatch followed.
“yeah ik, im sorry. But i can be there for you.” -snatch-

“So can i” Hajime rolled his eyes, but smiled. Fuyuhiko handed him the pen back.

“What do i do? I really do L-word him, it happened so fast. And i dont think its mutual, so its unfair. Monokuma is gonna” -snatch-

“dude, who said it wasnt mutual? tell me what happened. exactly. every detail.”

“do i have to??” Hajime audibly groaned. Fuyuhiko shoved him teasingly.

“okay maybe not every detail if u know what i mean” -snatch- A small giggle followed.

“shut up dude. we werent. We were talking about … the trial. It was hard, i was upset. But then he said all this nice stuff, asking how i was and staying with me. I was so happy, then we kissed, no more than that hiko!! But then i said it just out of nowhere and then i was thinking about all the shit i just told you about monokuma and putting him in danger so i started crying cause im a freaking wuss” -snatch- Fuyuhiko shot him a glare, but handed the pen back.
“ok not a wuss but i was crying, then he said he was gonna leave and he looked kinda scared? Or sad? idk but i told him to forget about it and then he left.” Hajime’s wrist had started to ache. Fuyuhiko took a moment to read the sudden paragraph that had appeared before him, frowning.

“dude. ur an idiot.” Hajime stared at Fuyuhiko’s page, and let out a gasp. Was he being a total dick right now, or was he onto something? He glanced at Fuyuhiko, but he kept writing.

“u told him you lo i mean l-worded him and then you started CRYING!!! wtf did you think his reaction was gonna be??” Hajime just started like the idiot he apparently was.
“this morning he looked so depressed dude, like the guy he liked didnt like him back. I wonder why he thought that????” Fuyuhiko rolled his eyes, obviously fed up with Hajime’s stupidity. There was a sincerity and humour in his tone though, clearly not actually angry.

Was that really an option? That Nagito just thought he regretted his words? Maybe it did seem that way, but he still…

“dude” Fuyuhiko continued to write. “monokunt or not u gotta talk to him. He obviously likes you!!!” He drew a little winky face on the page, Hajime shoved him playfully in embarrassment. Fuyuhiko continued, making an active effort to make his handwriting neater.

“u can talk to him, like ur talking to me. And monokuma obviously already saw u guys bone, since he added that rule. Maybe he didnt hear you say the l word and he thinks you guys are just hooking up. Look, i reckon if you guys just pretend you hate each other now or something, monokuma will leave u guys alone, and you can still make out and crap cause he's a fucking bear he probably knows what horniness is…. he'll just assume. im like 85% sure he does like u, at least a little.” -snatch-

‘85%?!?!’ Hajime moaned verbally, but there was no offense in his tone.
“So. Pretend like we broke up or something and that we re having angry sex? Hiko, seriously?” -snatch-

“I would say for you guys to just keep ur distance but ik you guys need each other. Ive seen how happy he makes u :)!!!!” he doodled a small smiley face with a lot of exclamation points.

Hajime chuckled. “Yeah, he does.” He wrote, giving it more care than the other words. He took time to make his words clear, with proper punctuation, because he needed Fuyuhiko to know that Nagito was special. And he was.
“Alright, I'll talk to him.” -snatch-
“promise between brothers?” He smiled.
“yeah, as long as being brothers means I get Yakuza perks.” He wrote a little “:P” and let out a soft giggle. Fuyuhiko gave him an awkward shove and half-hug, since they were still shoved under the bed. Hajime swore he would repay him for his kindness as soon as he got off this island. And they would, together. He had calmed down immensely now, laughing and chuckling, almost forgetting that he would have to have a very awkward talk with Nagito later. But their playful banter was interrupted by something big, something awful, something tragic.

‘Puhuhuhu, are we playing a game of hide and seek?’ The moment the two heard that they jumped out of their skin being startled by the black & white bear that was leading this killing game. All they could make out were his monotone paws from under Hajime’s bed, and they started to panic.

‘Shit.’ Fuyuhiko spat under his breath. ‘Hajime, what now?’
Without hesitation, Hajime grabbed the notebook he was holding, and started to rip the pages as finely as he could, trying to leave no trace of their spilled secrets on paper.

As Fuyuhiko joined in, they finished as fast as they could, stuffing the remnants in their pockets and awkwardly crawling out of the bed.

‘Yeah, no.’
‘And what were you doing, my lovely students? Canoodling? What could you need to hide from your teacher?’ He growled, brandishing a claw.
‘You think you're smart, hiding under the bed like rabbits, trying to sneak around? Well whaddya say we stop that? Puhuhuhu….’

A ding from the boy's monopads made them fear the worst.

Rule #10:

‘Huh? What the hell does that even mean?’ Fuyuhiko scoffed.
‘Well sue me if I can't think of anything to stop you from doing whatever you would call what you're doing.’ Monokuma was seething, sweating profusely and making the boys insanely uncomfortable. They heard another ping, and the rule had been deleted.

‘Just because there's nothing I can do to technically stop you doesn't mean you should do it! Have you no respect for your elders! The things I have to deal with... effing teens...’ Monokuma growled, before seemingly disappearing from thin air. Monokuma was an evil mastermind, but for reasons Hajime couldn't seem to fathom, even he had to follow the rules, so he wouldn't harm them. Not physically anyway. There was no telling if he had heard Hajime’s words, or could somehow read what the two friends had written together. There was no telling if their plan would work, or if they would even survive it. But as Hajime and Fuyuhiko went to the beach to burn their secrets and vulnerabilities on paper, they smiled anyway, laughing at having outsmarted the mastermind.

Oh, how naive teenagers can be…

Chapter Text

Part 12 - Chapter 4

A routine had started on Jabberwock, it seemed. A murder occurs, new areas open up, and Hajime awkwardly runs into Nagito while exploring it.

Hajime and Fuyuhiko had been together for a while, after their little bonfire, exploring together. He explained that a new island had opened up and all the students had planned to explore it together. He knew that his best friend needed to talk to Nagito, but he thought he could use a break from the stress. Plus, he was getting kind of jealous of how much of Hajime’s thoughts had been consumed by Nagito… It came with the territory of love, he supposed. They were friends, potential boyfriends were on a whole other level! So Fuyuhiko didn’t mind too much, he understood that.

But he would still take any chance he got to hang out with Hajime, on the rare occasion he wasn’t thinking about Nagito. So he explored just the two of them, laughing and joking along the way. He seemed to forget all about his troubles, for an hour or so, finding a rollercoaster, Kazuichi, Sonia, Gundham, Akane, and a very weirdly robotic Nekomaru to ride on it with. The newly named ‘Mechamaru’ was a whole other long story that Fuyuhiko didn’t really understand, and it made no sense, but everyone was just glad he was alive, whatever that meant for a robot, anyway…

In summary, Fuyuhiko and Hajime were having fun. The puffy redness of his eyes were almost unnoticeable now, and as they made their way to a ginormous castle, they were laughing. Before locking eyes with…

Guess bro-time with Hajime is over, huh?

‘H-hinata-san!’
‘Ah, N-nagito…!’
‘I’ll uh… let you guys chat. See ya, Hajime!’
‘Hiko!’ He whined, but to no avail. Fuyuhiko was gone, and Hajime was alone with the person he so desperately wanted to see, but at the same time, was terrified.

Okay, before I say something stupid, I need to lay out a plan… tell him to forget about the L word, but make it clear I like him. Tell him that Monokuma will use it against us if we stay together but tell him that once we leave this island, we can-

‘Hinata-san, are you alright…?’

Hinata-san? We’ve reverted that far? Shit, this sucks.

‘Y-yeah! I’m fine! But if it’s okay, can we talk…?’
‘Oh, Hinata-san,’ Ouch - Hajime thought - that stings. ‘We don't have to do that if you do not wish. I understand the strain it will give talking to filth-’
‘Please?’ A small beg was enough to break down Nagito’s walls it seemed:
‘A-alright…’

Hajime took his hand and started leading him back to his cottage, where his notebook was, before realising how it may have seemed, blushing, and letting go of his hand. He walked in silence, cheeks pink, trusting that Nagito was following.

They finally made it, after a very awkward and long walk, and Hajime shut the door to his cottage, slowly.

‘So, uh… how you been?’
‘G-good…’

They both blushed, their shoes apparently becoming very entrancing, since they couldn't take their eyes off them.

Come on, Hajime, tell him to forget about the L word, but make it clear I like him. Tell him that Monokuma will use it against us if we stay together but tell him that once we leave this island, we can maybe hopefully be together…?

He repeated that mantra in his head for what seemed like hours at this point now, but no words were coming out of his mouth. Not the words he wanted to, anyway.

‘Nagito… There's so much I want to say, but…’
‘You don’t have to-’
‘So much I need to say.’
‘But…?’
‘But not here. Please follow me.’ Hajime whispered, as he dropped to his knees.
‘H-h-hinata-san!!!’
Hajime blushed, but quickly crawled away, tucking under the bed. He stuck a hand out from under the bed, and beckoned Nagito down. He obliged, albeit hesitantly.

‘Hinata-san, what’s-’
Hajime pressed a finger to his lips, and beckoned to the notebook he was holding.

“I hate when you call me that, you know.”

Nagito just blushed, stuttering.

‘I-I… I’m sorry…’
But Hajime didn't remove the hand from his lips, and passed him another pen instead, giving him free rein to quote on quote ‘speak’.
“Hina I mean Hajime, what is this? I can’t help but be very confused.”
His handwriting was impeccable, and Hajime started to feel self conscious about his own grammar.
“This is the only way we can speak without monokuma hearing us” he quickly added a full stop, before Nagito could notice he wasn't planning to use one. Damn it, why was Nagito so good at everything he did?
“Oh, I see. What is it that you need to tell me?”

“I wanted to ask you that you forget what I said, first. Yknow about the “

“I don't want to.” Nagito started to write, over where Hajime was trying to. Both boys blushed.

“Don't want to what?” He wrote slowly, nervous.

“I don't want to forget what you said.” Nagito wrote, blushing harder.

“But, I'm scared.”

“Because you didn’t mean it?”

“Nononononono!!!!!! Of course not!!!!!” Hajime scribbled. Nagito chuckled, smiling. Hajime saw a wave of relief flow over him, and he just turned away, extremely embarrassed.

“It's just that, I think that if Monokuma knew, he would use you to hurt me… Like peko.”

“Peko?”

“Fuyuhiko has a theory. That her execution was designed to keep their relationship in mind. It's like Monokuma knew about their relationship, and used it against them. We think he made it so Fuyuhiko could run in on purpose. To make him feel more despair… Or something.” Nagito nodded.

“And I don't want that to happen to you.”

Hajime finally turned to look at Nagito. He expected confusion, even sadness or anger, but he only saw a smile.

“You don't have to worry about that. I believe in my luck. And I am honoured that you care about me so much that you feel the need to express it with such a strong word… But I assure you you don't have to feel any grief because of me. Truly, I am not worth it, Hajime.”

“Hey!!!! It's not me feeling the need or something, it's the truth!!!!” Hajime scribbled, suddenly angry. He had forgotten how much self-hatred Nagito held in him, and it was infuriating.

“Are you serious? You” he paused “love me?”

And suddenly, the anger dissipated, and all that was left was fear, and embarrassment.

“Like I said… We need to forget about that, for our safety.”

“But.” Nagito’s hand started to shake, and he blushed, but he pushed through, and wrote the sentence that Hajime didn’t know how desperately he needed to hear.
“I am quite sure I love you too. So we are in this together.”

Hajime blushed profusely, and he smiled widely, so embarrassingly wide, he covered his face in his hand. Nagito smiled back, and gently took the hand off his face.
“I want to kiss you.”

“And why don't you, Hajime?”

“monokuma…”

Hajime was so unbelievably happy that his feelings were returned, in full. Nagito was beautiful, gentle, and his smile lifted Hajime up so wonderfully. But, he couldn't feel the wholeness of his happiness, because they were still on Jabberwock Island. They were still in a killing game, hiding under a bed and speaking in notes so an evil mastermind bear wouldn't hear…it was ridiculous. He wanted to be happy, and he wanted to take the boy he fell in love with in his arms, hold him. But, the risk was too great.

“he can't know. he’ll kill one of us to bring despair to the other.”

A pause. Nagito frowned, letting out a small sigh. But he tried to smile.

“I understand, Hajime. What do you propose we do?”

“well, I think the best thing is to fake a ‘break up’ …y’know like crying and hating each other. I don't like it, honestly, but it's safer to keep our distance.”

“I must admit, I do not like the sound of that either, but if it must be done, then I will do it.”

Nagito gave a sad smile to Hajime, before putting his pen to paper.

“Hajime, thank you for taking the time to talk to me. You never fail to make me feel special.”

Nagito was still struggling with his obsession to gain hope, but Hajime was the one who made him feel like he could overcome it. He still had those beliefs of course, that would never go away, but Hajime made him feel like you didn’t need despair to feel hope. He made him feel like he wasn’t filth, or disgusting, because Hajime touched him and held him with no hesitation. It was without doubt that he loved him, but never in a million years would he guess Hajime would ever feel the same. So he knew that eventually his bad luck would catch up to him, and there would be a cost for such good fortune. He now knew that you didn't need despair to feel hope, but it was still possible Hajime was wrong… That is why he wrote:

“Do not worry. I will not fail, I can do what you say. Because I love you, that is the truth. I have never felt this way, but it is undeniable.”

Hajime chuckled. “You always say such cheesy stuff while keeping a straight face…”

Nagito giggled, and went to respond, but-

‘Hajime Hinata, again? Didn’t I tell you to respect your elders?! This is really getting on my nerves!’

Suddenly, they heard a growl, a black paw and white paw appearing from seemingly nowhere, brandishing claws, reaching under the bed. Hajime scrambled to start ripping the pages again, and Nagito understood, following suit.

‘Damn it, it's always you! I have half a mind to ban those stupid notebooks, and ya don't wanna know what the other half is thinking!!’ Monokuma, strained, but finally found and grabbed the boys' collars, pulling them out. Luckily, the pages were unreadable now, which only angered Monokuma more.
‘Tell me, right now, what you two were doing under there! And you better call me sir, you disrespectful brats!’

Hajime looked at the boy in front of him, and sported an exaggerated frown, signalling for Nagito to do the same.

‘We were just… b-breaking up, uh… sir.’

Nagito turned away, trying to look hurt.

‘Y-yes… sir.’ He tried to let out a sniffle, but it wasn’t all that convincing. Luckily, Monokuma didn't seem to notice.

‘Puhuhu, this is rich! You finally realised he was a whacko, huh? After all the boning you did? Damn, way to fill em up and flee! ahahahahahaha!!!!!’
Monokuma roared with laughter, seemingly pleased with his so-called students' conflict. He was practically slapping his knee. Monokuma was evil, without a doubt, but the boys tried to hide a smile, realising their plan could be working. Monokuma believed in despair above all else, of course he would believe their bond would dissipate so fast.

Yes, they could be free of fear!

‘I knew letting you hump each other would end like this. Don’t know how you even put up with this freak for so long, Hajime!’

Nagito frowned deeply, for real this time. Hajime wanted to comfort him, but he knew it was impossible. So he turned to the mastermind, hoping to steer the subject away from them.

‘What do you want, Monokuma?’

‘Well I was going to make an announcement, but I couldn't even find you bastards! You with your stupid notebooks, pissing me off, thinking you're smart…’

‘What IS it, Monokuma?’ Hajime spat, frustrated.

‘Welll…. I have a surprise for you! Can you gather outside the funhouse, please! You better not get back under that bed, or on top of it! No hate sex, we don’t have time for that!’
The boys blushed, and Monokuma intimidatingly growled again, shaking his fist, before disappearing as fast as he had appeared.

‘We better go before he gets even angrier, and… Nagito?’

‘Yes, uh… Hinata-kun?’

‘I’m sorry, for um… what I had to say. But it’s for the best.’

‘I understand… Hinata-kun…’

‘And, uh… Never speak to me again, uh… you… bastard?’

Hajime tried not to laugh at his last statement. He saw Nagito suppress a small giggle too, covering his mouth. He was not a good actor by any means, and those words to describe Nagito just seemed so ridiculous, but he knew it had to be done. They would have to pretend to hate each other until he got off this island, but Hajime just didn’t know how long he could bear it…

They walked toward the fourth island in silence, Hajime’s thoughts consuming him.

They had just confessed their love to each other! Normally that would mean they became boyfriends… But here? In this situation? With the threat of death looming over them at all times? That was just unthinkable… As much as he wished it wasn’t true, there was no way they could mess around, kiss or even hold hands until the mastermind was gone and they were off this island. So as happy as he was to have someone to love, all he was filled with was frustration. They couldn't even touch, goddammit!

There were not enough notebooks or beds to hide under in the world for him to express how much he hated that stupid monochrome bear.

Chapter Text

Part 13 - Chapter 4

‘So, what, we have to get on this train, and we get parts for a ship?’
‘Aaaaand clues about your stolen school memories!’
‘It ain't gonna kill us or something?’
‘Not the train…’

Monokuma was talking to the group of classmates in front of the funhouse, trying to convince them to get on a creepy Monokuma themed steam train, the kind you would find at a fair. Hajime, as he walked in alone- Nagito very far behind- thought that if Monokuma wanted it, it couldn't be good.

‘Hajime! How’d it go with…’ Fuyuhiko quickly noticed his friend, nervously trying to deduce exactly why Nagito was comically far behind.

‘Fine. We broke up. I don’t want to talk about it.’ Hajime tried to scowl, signalling that they couldn't talk here. Fuyuhiko looked sceptical, but understood. The plan was working, it seemed…?

‘So, what’s happening, Hiko?’
‘Apparently, we get info and parts for a ship if we all get on this train. And, it has to be every single one of us.’

‘Hey Hajime! Tell the others that the risk could be worth a ship to leave this island.’
Kazuichi called, putting an arm over his shoulder. Nagito, finally caught up, joined the group, and tried to hide a jealous glare from Kazuichi.

‘But Kazuichi, we mustn't endanger our friends!’
‘Y-you're probably right… miss Sonia.’ Kazuichi moaned, backing off of Hajime. Nagito let out a sigh of relief, though no one noticed.

‘So, what do we do?’ Akane shouted, with her mouth still full of something. Where’d she even get it? And she was practically clinging to ‘Mechamaru’s’ side looking to him for his opinion. She seemed happier, than usual. There was still an air of guilt that her actions caused Nekomaru’s body to be misshapen so, but he announced that he didn’t mind the night before, so she was smiling, trying to be as carefree as he wanted her to be.
‘Nekomaru, whaddya think?’

‘LET’S JUST DO IT! WHAT HAVE WE GOT TO LOSE!?’
‘Hey, please keep your voice down.’ Chiaki sighed, eyes still clung to her PSP. ‘But he’s right, we should try it. I think.’

‘I suppose the risk may be worth taking, this time…’ Gundham muttered.

‘I know no one asked me, but I agree with Tanaka-kun. If something goes wrong, my strong classmates will push through it!’ Nagito added, and everyone turned to look at him, forgetting he was even there. Hajime tried to hold back a smile. Can he stop being so damn cute?

‘He’s being weird, as usual, but he makes a good point. We’ve survived worse than a train ride.’ Kazuichi concluded, and was met with a sea of nods. Except for Hajime, who couldn’t help but be offended on Nagito’s behalf. However, he pushed those feelings aside, for now. It was undeniable that they all had at least some determination to get off this island, so despite the risk, everyone was willing to try it. Monokuma just giggled, rubbing his paws together like a cartoonish supervillain.

‘Puhuhu! Wonderful! Now if everyone would please step into a carriage.’

The carriages all fit two people, so Hajime slotted up with Fuyuhiko. Nagito was left alone at the back. Hajime wanted to spare him a glance, to tell him that it would be okay - it wasn't worth the risk.

He was frustrated. They hadn’t really gotten a chance to talk at all. Hajime had his first love confess to him, and he couldn't even hold his hand. He realised just how unsatisfying the confession was… he didn't even get to hear the words on Nagito’s lips… His soft, pink…

Hajime suddenly slapped his cheeks, trying to pull himself together.
‘You okay bro?’ Fuyuhiko questioned, confused.
‘Yeah, I’m fine… Don’t worry.’

Keep it together! - Hajime thought: - It would be a while before they could do any of the things that were flowing through Hajime’s mind right now. But he knew deep down the thing he wanted most was to confess his love properly, with spoken words, and get to hold him in his arms as he returned the words… That confession under the bed fucking sucked, - he concluded - but who’s fault was that? Monokuma, that’s who. Okay, maybe he could have spared a peck on the cheek under that bed, and it would have made all the difference, but he was scared. He was terrified of letting Nagito get taken, hurt, or worse… Hajime didn’t seem to be a main target of torture right now, that honour going to Nekomaru. (what with him getting killed only to be turned into a robot, and all.) But he still had to be careful. Maybe his fears were just paranoia, but it wasn’t worth it, if his fears being true meant that Nagito would…

‘All aboard folks!’ Monokuma’s singsong voice interrupted his thoughts, and all of a sudden, the train was moving. Towards clues to leave this hell or certain death, Hajime didn’t know.

‘Hajime, are you okay?’ Fuyuhiko whispered next to him. He seemed genuinely concerned. He knew of the plan to pretend to break up with Nagito, but he knew how hurt Hajime would still be. And he was right, unfortunately.

‘Hiko, it’s fine. I am… well, not super stoked as you would say, but it’s for the best.’ He whispered back.
‘What is for the best?’ Sonia chimed in. She was in the carriage behind with Gundham, and was tapping on Hajime’s shoulder. ‘Is everything alright?’ She was smiling softly, and it immediately eased all of Hajime’s tension. Yes, he would be okay. He had friends who cared. Sonia really had a way of convincing her friends that everything would be okay. She would be a great leader some day.

‘Yeah, Sonia, thanks but I’m fine… I’ll tell you about it later.’
‘Alright! If you say so!’ Sonia gleamed, before going back to enthusiastically talking to Gundham, who was blushing from all the attention. Huh, Hajime would have to ask about that later.

‘Hajime, are you sure?’ Fuyuhiko turned back to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
‘What about him?’
‘Huh?’
‘Who’s gonna ask *him* if he’s okay?’ Hajime sighed, but not daring to look back at who he was talking about. He had friends who cared about him now, but who did Nagito have?

‘Dude, I’ Fuyuhiko started, but his voice faded. Hajime turned to look, and his head had drooped down, slumped over.

‘Fuyuhiko…?’ Hajime whispered, and he went to shake Fuyuhiko awake, but his eyelids were so heavy all of a sudden. What the hell?

‘Nagito-’ He turned to find him in the crowd of heads, but his face was already gone from his vision, slumped down alone on the last carriage. As Hajime lost consciousness, all he wished to do was comfort the boy he loved. A nice thought to have, as he drifted away into certain death.

…

‘Hajime, you good?’ Fuyuhiko was standing above him, clutching his shoulders and shaking him softly… He felt a sense of nostalgia for the gesture, but couldn't recall why.

He was a little groggy, and the world looked a redder than normal, but it wasn't a lie to say:
‘Yeah, I’m fine, you?’

‘Everyone’s okay. Most of us are awake already.’

‘Awake? What happened?’
Hajime sat up and looked around. His eyes found all his friends, including Nagito: some looked as groggy as he felt, but he was relieved no one looked any worse. Then, he realised that this wasn't the train… The walls were covered in… strawberries?

‘Uh, I’m still wondering about that myself.’ Fuyuhiko sighed.
‘Yeah man, where the hell are we?’ Akane added, and Hajime found her sat next to him, looking like she had just woken up too.

‘YO, MONOKUMA!’ Everyone turned to see Nekomaru, hands cupped around his mouth and shouting at the ceiling, which Hajime was disturbed to discover: was also covered in strawberries.

‘Dude, don’t just call him!’ Kazuichi squealed, but it was futile.

‘Puhuhu, hello students! And how are we doing…?’ Monokuma snickered, appearing as soon as the last syllable left Nekomaru’s mouth.
‘Hey, don’t pretend to care! It’s cruel!’ Monomi whined, appearing behind him.
Monokuma’s fist moved faster than light, clocking her in the jaw.

‘You shut it little sister, I care plenty!’ He growled as Monomi flew through the room, rolling down the stairs. She wasn’t going to return anytime soon.

‘Now, is everyone here? Good, good. It’s time I tell ya the motive!’

‘Motive? You never said anything about a motive!’ Hajime said, but found he wasn’t at all surprised. Of course this is a motive, why would it be an escape? Things are just never that easy.

‘Well, this funhouse is the motive! I hope you like it, cause you whippersnappers ain't allowed to leave till one of you gets to stabbin'!’ He giggled, as if he just told a joke on the playground, and didn’t just commit a class of teenagers to death.

‘Shit, we totally fuckin fell for it!’ Hajime heard Fuyuhiko scoff behind him. There was a collective panic, various confusion and some shrieks, mostly from Kazuichi, until Sonia broke the silence.

‘Now, now. This isn’t so bad… I am sure there's a way to escape.’ She shouted as softly as she could, trying to break through the panic.
‘Will we escape before dinner? I’m gettin' kinda peckish.’
‘Akane, you were just eating.’ Chiaki mumbled.

‘Dinner? Who said anything about dinner?’

‘Whaddya mean? Did you forget us normal people have to eat?!’ Akane growled, ‘Stupid bear.’

‘I didn’t forget! It’s just, all the food is outside, and you guys are… well, inside. Think you can figure out the solution, or do I have to spell it out for ya? Ahahahahahaha!’ Monokuma giggled, before tumbling down the stairs behind Monomi, disappearing.

‘So this motive is to not provide sustenance, and we must avoid the threat of starving… How devilishly despicable…’

‘Will your Devas be okay!?’ Sonia gasped, clutching Gundhams forearm. He blushed deeply, and turned away. ‘T-the flowers here seemed to be imported f-from a circle of h-hell… so, it will be suitable… T-thank you for your concern…’ He mumbled.

‘Ah, splendid! I’m glad.' She smiled, oblivious of what she was inflicting on the poor boy. 'Now, for the rest of us. All we need to do is find a means of escape. I propose we explore the area!’ She stepped up onto a chair, clapping her hands together in determination. A wave of agreement washed over everyone, and the panic seemed to subside, at least for now.

Hajime turned to look at Nagito, and found his eyes already on him. They both quickly looked away, trying to hide their blush.

He’s fine - Hajime thought - no need to look at him anymore.
With Sonia rallying everyone together, it was easy to get to work. They found plenty, 6 rooms of varying comfort levels, a common room, something called a final dead room that the boys were too scared to enter alone, and an elevator. Fuyuhiko and Hajime followed the elevator, finding a whole other tower, grape themed this time. In here, there were 6 more rooms, another common room, a statue of an ‘ogre’, and a strange Monokuma museum. They left that room as soon as they entered it.

As they all gathered back in the strawberry house common room, they shared their findings. No one seemed to find any means of escape, and everyone was too scared to try the final dead room. In truth, that was the only room that seemed like it might have an escape route, but no one was ready to resort to it just yet. It was what Monokuma wanted them to do, after all.

As the clock in the common room struck 10pm, the classmates decided it would just be best to get some rest, for now. If they couldn’t eat, the least they could do was try and conserve their energy. There were enough rooms to let all the boys stay in strawberry house, except one.

‘Damn it, the girls are outnumbered. What do we do?’ Fuyuhiko groaned.

‘I don’t mind if Hajime comes with us girls, do you agree?’ Sonia smiled.
Chiaki and Akane nodded, the latter grabbing Hajime’s arm and dragging him towards grape house. Hajime spotted a jealous glare from Kazuichi, and suppressed a giggle.

‘Ah, thank you, I appreciate it.’ Hajime nodded, trying to ignore the look he was getting from his overalled friend.

‘Let us retire for the night. Shall we meet back here in the morning?’ Sonia concluded, and everyone agreed. WIth that, the girls left with Hajime, leaving the boys alone in strawberry house.

As Hajime was dragged away, Nagito shot him a smile that said ‘See you tomorrow.’

Hajime shot him a small smile back that said: ‘stay safe’

That was all the communication they could really exchange, but they hoped that would be enough.

Chapter Text

Part 14 - Chapter 4

Hajime couldn't sleep. Him and the girls were staying in grape house, and they had drawn straws on where to stay. There were three types of rooms, one amazing, one mediocre and one crummy and there were two types of each room, so there were enough for everyone to have their own. However, out of guilt, Hajime had volunteered to take the crummy room… He was the only boy they let stay with them, and he knew that Kazuichi was jealous. But the quality of his room wasn’t the only reason he was worried.

Nagito. That was always what it came down to, wasn't it…?

Seriously, he didn’t even know he liked boys before he came to this island. He always had a small inkling of course, but it was so sudden… There were so many feelings Nagito made him feel that he hadn’t had the chance to process. But because they couldn't leave this stupid funhouse, there was nothing better to do that wouldn't use too much energy. On top of all that, he could feel his stomach rumbling already… So he needed to distract himself.

The least he could do was try to sort out his feelings, right? He wished he had a notebook or something, but he couldn’t find any, probably Monokuma’s doing. Punishment for using them against him, he supposed. But Hajime concluded it was worth it, anything was, if it meant he could talk to Nagito.

And that was the biggest issue, wasn’t it? They couldn’t even talk about their true feelings. Not that he was good at it, but he hoped he would get better, for his sake. Because saying he loved him didn’t seem to be enough. He wanted to protect him, support him, help him, wake up to him, hold him, kiss him, touch him, leave marks on him, pull his hair, caress his…

And as his thoughts started to wander, his pants started to raise.

‘For fucks sake.’ He muttered. Not now, not now! Think of disgusting things, think of…

‘Monokuma. Monokuma and Monomi. Monokuma’s grandma.’ He whispered, picturing those things in his head until the blood rush died down. It was a very effective strategy. But seriously, was he that touch starved? Or was Nagito just that good… When we were in my cottage, that one noise he was making was-

‘Okay, I can’t do this.’ Hajime stood up abruptly, before the blood rush could start again. He would just have to occupy his mind with something else.

…

‘Chiaki, are you awake?’ Hajime knocked on the door. Chiaki was occupying one of the fancier rooms, in which he realised that they were soundproof. Well, he couldn't stay alone any more without getting a goddamn boner, so he would just have to take the risk and walk in.

‘Chiaki, it's me. I’m coming in,’ Hajime announced, covering his eyes with his hand as he turned the doorknob with the other.
‘Hajime? What is it?’ Chiaki mumbled, sitting up from her bed and rubbing her eyes. She didn’t look too angry however, so Hajime smiled.

‘I’m really sorry to bother you, I was just uh… wondering how you were doing.’ Hajime sighed, lying through his teeth. He could never admit in a million years the real reason he was here. He picked Chiaki mostly because she was fun to talk to but also because he knew she wouldn’t really question him.

‘Uh… I’m fine… I think. A little hungry, but that’s it. Are you sure you're okay?’

‘Yeah… Just, wanna play a game or something?’

‘Can’t sleep ‘cause you’re overthinking?’

Okay, maybe he underestimated her. Hajime just nodded, before telling her he’d wait outside to let her sort herself out. He had just walked in on a girl in her room, and that thought made him blush. But she didn’t seem to mind.

They walked to the common room with her PSP in hand, only to find Akane and Sonia already there.

‘Oh! We didn’t expect to see you two!’

‘Sonia! Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah, neither of us could sleep, so me and the princess decided to just stay up and hang.’ Akane smiled, beckoning the pair to join them. ‘Same with you guys, huh?’
Chiaki nodded solemnly, deciding not to add that she was sleeping just fine, sparing Hajime the embarrassment.

‘So, shall we play ‘Truth or Dare? I read that it was popular at sleepovers in western countries.’ Sonia chimed happily.

‘Uh, I wouldn’t call this a sleepover…’ Hajime admitted. ‘And I think they play that everywhere.’

‘C’mon, it’ll be fun! Plus, sitting in a circle will stop me looking at the stupid grapes on the wall.’ Akane added.

‘Exactly!’ Sonia squealed, clearly excited. It didn’t really matter to her the situation, this still counted as her first sleepover. Even in a death game, she was going to make it wonderful, Hajime concluded. She can be very excitable at the worst of times…

‘There's nothing better to do, so alright…’ Hajime sighed. Chiaki nodded, not really paying attention, eyes locked on her console already.

‘I’ll start! Chiaki, truth or dare!’ Akane bellowed. Guess she was excited too?

‘Truth…’ She muttered, looking up from her game every now and then in an effort to pretend she cared.

‘What’s the hardest punch you’ve ever blown!’ Akane asked, seemingly very interested in the answer.

‘Uh, I doubt that-’

‘Probably my finishing blow on the mob boss I defeated…’

‘Woah, seriously?! That sounds so hardcore!!!’ She gleamed, looking very proud.

‘I think she’s talking about a video game…’ Hajime whispered, but no one cared. ‘Anyway, aren’t you supposed to ask more personal questions?’

‘Like how many ******** you’ve ********?’ Everyone looked at a smiling Sonia and gasped. Had she really just said that?! Everyone was blown speechless, even Chiaki.

‘Sonia, maybe a little less personal than that…’ Akane whispered in her ear, and she blushed, a polite hand covering her mouth.

‘Oh dear! I am so sorry for my rudeness!’ She gasped, embarrassed. Seriously, who was this girl? Was she even our age?

‘A-anyway, I’ll show you… It’ll be something like… uh… Akane, help me out here…’ Hajime stuttered. He had never really played truth or dare, his friends saying that was definitely a girls game. At the same time, he was embarrassed to know nothing about it. And he didn’t want to ask a princess who she had a crush on, wouldn’t her father have his head or something? He shuddered at the thought.

‘Like, Sonia, truth or dare!’

‘Uhhh, truth, right?’

‘Who you got a crush on?’ She snickered.

‘Oh! Well, that seems very personal…’ More personal than what you just asked? ‘What happens if I don’t want to answer?’

‘Then you gotta do a dare instead. But it’ll be a more gruesome one than normal!’

‘Then, I pick dare.’ Sonia said with no hesitation. The abruptness sent a wave of curiosity over the group, but it was dismissed by Akane’s speedy decision making skills.

‘Okaaay, I dare you to put your sock in your mouth!’ Akane giggled. Had she planned that all along? She was acting much more girly than Hajime was used to, and it made him feel weird. He felt like he was intruding on a girl's sleepover instead of speaking to his friends in the common room of a funhouse, so he looked down and fiddled with the hem of his shirt, trying not to get involved. He stopped listening, embarrassed by his presence, and just watched Chiaki’s game out of the corner of his eye. Sonia and Akane continued to exchange truths and dares, having fun. They almost forgot the situation they were in, the laughing drowning out the worries. Chiaki was smiling, and it seemed she was listening and enjoying their company more than she let on.

‘Okay, now that you got the hang of it, let’s ask Hajime!’ Akane laughed, arm still on Sonia’s shoulders.

‘Yes! Let’s!’ Sonia gleamed, cupping her hands in excitement.

‘Oh no… Ask me what?’ Their sudden scheming sent a shiver down the already scared boy’s spine.

‘Truth or dare, of course!’

‘Uh… Truth?’ Hajime stumbled. He knew it was risky, but he wanted to know what he wanted to ask them. If it was too personal, he could always forfeit to dare.

‘Do you know who made that rule with Nagito?’ Sonia and Akane asked in sync, a singsong voice accompanying their diluting pupils. This must have been on their mind for a while. How did they know? Did they figure out Hiyoko’s lie?

-Shit.-

‘Uh, dare.’ He muttered, turning away and trying to hide his now colourful cheeks.

‘Boooo…’ Akane groaned, exaggerating a double thumbs down and pretending to cry, before breaking the mask and erupting into giggles with Sonia. Her girliness is at its peak today. Maybe this is what she’s like when her mouth isn’t stuffed?

‘Okay, we dare you to tell us what is going on with you and Nagito!’ Sonia giggled.

‘W-wait! That’s cheating!’ Hajime stuttered, but there was no letting up. Their eyes continued to sparkle and they bugged him more and more, and they seemed desperate. C’mon, this is a killing game. Haven’t you got more to occupy your mind right now?

It seemed the answer was no.

‘Uh.. I-I… Um…’

‘Wait, Sonia, Akane… You’re making him uncomfortable, I think.’ Chiaki chimed in, suddenly paying more attention now that her friend was supposedly in danger.

‘Chiaki, that’s sweet, but… It’s not that…’ Hajime sighed. He wanted to tell his friends, he really did. He wanted to be proud that it was Nagito that chose him, and that they were together. He wanted to shout it, scream it. But that wasn’t smart, not now.

‘I want to tell you, but… Monokuma would…’ He started, voice fading away. The excitement died in the girl's eyes, crawling over to Hajime’s spot. Sonia enveloped him in a sudden hug, and Hajime startled back.

‘We are sorry, we were not thinking of that. We understand.’

‘Yeah, dude. It was just nice to pretend we were normal high school students for a minute…’ Akane whispered sadly. Suddenly the gravity of the situation seemed to wash back over everyone. All the excitement and giggling had vanished as if it was never there. And it was all Hajime’s paranoia’s fault.

‘I-I mean, I can tell you, if any of you have some paper, or something? If we go under the table, and rip it up after, he can’t see…’ He added abruptly, trying to lighten the mood. Everyone needed the distraction, and it was Hajime’s responsibility, he decided.

‘Uh, I do not possess one currently, no.’ Sonia admitted, pulling back from the embrace but looking a lot happier than she had sounded just a moment ago.

‘Me neither.’ Akane pouted, before standing up and looking around the common room, as if one would suddenly appear.

‘I may have a solution.’ Chiaki chimed in, holding up a drawing program on her handheld.

‘Chiaki, that’s perfect!’ Hajime gleamed, pulling her into a hug, before pulling away almost immediately, hand finding the back of his neck. He couldn’t just do that, he was a taken man after all. He thought he was, anyway. Or was the right word “hoped”? ‘Uh, thank you.’

‘Shall we?’ Sonia beckoned to the table in the dining room. They paused, looking around for any protest of Monokuma. Maybe he was sleeping? If that was possible… With no sign of intrusion, the four classmates crawled under the table.

Chiaki handed him the device, and on the program, with his finger, dragged together the characters he wanted to say.

“Please try not to speak. Anything could cause Monokuma to come and snatch Chiaki's console. If you want to speak, please just put ur hand up or smth, I’ll pass it.”

He showed the device to his friends in front of him, making sure they all saw, being greeted with nods. He continued:

“So, I don’t know if you noticed, but me and Nagito are kinda. Together. Please don't make a big deal of this…” He wrote, before showing the device back to the group, head bowed down. As their eyes followed the words, and landed on the big word: Together, everyone couldn’t help but let out a gasp.

‘Woah, no wa-’ Akane almost bellowed, before finding Chiaki’s hand covering her mouth. Hajime smiled, glad no one seemed to be judging him or disapproving. Yet, anyway.

“But, we had to break up. Or pretend to. So Monokuma can’t use it against us. We're pretending to hate each other, right now. It's… hard.” As he finished, he turned the device around again, and instead of comments or remarks, all he got were smiles, a big thumbs up from Akane and a tight hug from Sonia. The latter asked for the device, and Hajime let go.

“We shall support you, of course. We can keep a secret. And we are so happy for you! But, sorry that horrid rodent is keeping you apart.” She wrote, Chiaki and Akane nodding along.

“Is there anything else we can do?” Hajime simply shook his head. “Well, I for one already guessed it was you. And you two are so adorable!” She giggled, handing the device to Chiaki.

“The way you guys look at each other is gross. But cute. I think.” Chiaki added, smiling softly.
Akane beckoned for Chiaki to give her a turn and she obliged, watching her write, before snatching the device back before Akane could finish.

‘Hey!’ Chiaki just wrote: “Akane is proud of you for getting the rule added. But in more colourful words.” Akane sighed, but nodded, before grabbing Hajime by the shoulders and giving him an awkward noogie - if only awkward for him. Chiaki added: “Anything else?”

Hajime smiled, taking the device from her and simply writing: “Just, thank you. For being my friends.”

As they all crawled from under the table, they enveloped Hajime in a hug, all three of them, and Hajime smiled. Before leaving for his room to finally have a fulfilling rest, he thought to himself, just how lucky he was.

He expected at least one of them to judge him for choosing Nagito, but everyone respected him. It was so refreshing… Even Fuyuhiko looked more shocked than the girls were… He really hoped, for what seemed like the millionth time, that they would all get off this island together. But he wasn’t annoyed. He was just finding more and more reasons to live. Nothing wrong with that, huh? He was so so lucky. As he drifted off to sleep, he smiled. If he was this lucky, imagine how much joy the Ultimate Lucky Student must be feeling right now!

Oh, how wrong he was.

…

Nagito Komaeda, the Ultimate Lucky Student, was not having very much luck at all. Even though he had scored the highest quality bedroom, and was blessed with not much of an appetite, he was still miserable. Why? Because he was separated from Hajime. When Hajime confessed to him, he could see in his eyes how much more he wanted to say, and he wanted to hear it. He just couldn't believe the things he was saying, he wanted conformation, explanations, and, well, more. More of Hajime, more of his kisses, more of his praise, more of his touch… even though he knew he didn’t deserve such things. Hajime was an actual Ultimate student, even if he didn’t remember what his talent was. Nagito wasn’t worthy of his love at all! Yet, here he was. The fact that they were separated and had to pretend to hate each other… Well, that was proof it was real.

The bad luck that he was experiencing, was because of the good fortune that the universe had blessed him with. The despair it brought him to have to glare at Hajime, or worse, not even look at him, was because of the greatness of the hope it brought him to be with Hajime. To have Hajime love him so. The only explanation for the despair: was that the love was real.

That terrified him.

He always kept to himself, before being admitted to Hope's Peak. He was so excited to be around such talented people, but he never planned to engage with them, let alone… what he and Hajime had been doing. But there was more at stake here! They were stuck on an island, his classmates had been forced to kill each other. And worst of all, there was a traitor among them, who no one really seemed to believe existed. It was like he was the only one who cared. Hajime certainly didn’t, because for some reason, his mind was occupied by Nagito. Nagito? Me? And now Nagito was doing it too, all trains of thought leading right back to Hajime. Okay, maybe he was in love, but he had never been in love before! Was this really supposed to happen? He had more important things to worry about, why was this love consuming his thoughts! He needed to figure out who the traitor was, for goodness sake!

Then why did he wish Hajime was holding him right now, above all else?

No, it is just because he helps me relax, and I think better when I relax. He just makes me forget about the concept of despair, because of how the cruel world seems to crumble when I am focused on his gorgeous eyes. Okay, maybe I’m in love, but only because who wouldn’t be! And I shouldn't be thinking of this, I must formulate a plan to find the traitor! Maybe I could try the Final Dead Room? Ah, but everyone seems so against it. Maybe they are all traitors? No, no not all. There are those who Hajime trusts, and I wish to trust them too. Wait, I am doing it again! He’s clouding my judgement! Ah, this is terrible! I must be objective, if I wish to formulate this plan. I must have the capacity to suspect everyone, even Hajime!

Nagito laughed to himself, shaking his head in disbelief.

No, not Hajime. I doubt he would have the capacity to betray his friends. He is too kind. That is objective, I am at no fault here. But, who else? Oh, if Hajime were here, he would have a good idea. He would joke with me, and tease me… But not cruelly at all. He would have his hand in my hair, and I would lay on his chest, and we would figure out who the traitor was, together. I am sure he would believe me. Oh, Hajime…

Nagito really, really missed him.

What am I thinking? I mustn’t miss him! I am supposed to not love him, not one bit! But he is just so… Oh, this is impossible! I wish to see him, I really do… I wish he would walk in right now, he would pin me down, pull my hair. He would ride me, I could hear him moan… But he would take such good care of me, even though he was using me, he would never say that, and it wouldn’t be true, because I would be moaning too. My dick going in and out and in… and…

He found his hand had made its way to his cock, and was stroking it softly, whispering Hajime’s name. As he realised this, he sighed, and made his way to the bathroom.
No, Nagito was not lucky at all.

Chapter Text

Part 15 - Chapter 4

As a new day started, the hunger got worse. They hadn’t eaten in about 24 hours, apart from Akane, who always seemed to have snacks on her. She was chewing on something just before they got on the train, but she was struggling just as much as everyone else.

Hajime’s ‘sleepover’ the night before did make him feel more energised, so when he met up with Fuyuhiko, he greeted him with a smile.

‘Hey, bro!’
‘Bro? Am I finally rubbing off on ya?’ Fuyuhiko snorted, looking very tired. ‘What’s got you so chipper, huh?’

‘I, uh… Told the girls.’

‘Told ‘em what?’

‘Everything.’

‘Safe everything or EVERYTHING everything?’

‘EVERYTHING everything. Chiaki’s PSP had a drawing app.’

‘Oh my gosh, dude, are you sure?’

‘Yeah, I trust them. They're my friends.’ The boys looked over to Sonia, Akane and Chiaki chatting with Nagito. Wait what? They would never normally have done that, but… Were they trying to be friends with him for Hajime’s sake? Nagito looked ecstatic, but overwhelmed with so many people talking to him… Hajime turned away before he could let out an embarrassingly large smile.

…

The next day, Hajime wasn’t nearly as energised. No one knew what to do with themselves, and there was still no sign of food or escape. Monokuma had forced everyone to do something called ‘Monokuma tai chi’ - to keep them active and healthy. In reality, it was torture. It was only the second day, but they were already exhausted. They could drink water from the sinks in the bathrooms, but how long could they go without food?

During tai chi, Hajime watched as Nagito struggled with his exercises, more than the rest. He recalled his multiple illnesses, and wanted to comfort him, but…. Well, there was no need to go over why that was impossible. No use in grieving.

So Hajime turned away.

…

The third day, they woke up for tai chi. Hajime’s stomach had a constant aching pain. His friends all concluded that they would rather die than to kill someone to escape, no matter how much pain they were in. Fuyuhiko had dragged Nagito there, as he was too weak to stand, but they were not allowed to not be in attendance. It was torture to see. You could start to see his bones through his skin.

So Hajime turned away.

…

The third night, Hajime had enough. He wanted to get out of here, he wanted to talk to Nagito again. He wanted to eat. He didn’t know what else to do.

He stumbled out of bed, dragging himself down accursed stairs that had been stamped with grapes, walls of grapes, floors of grapes. It was a taunt. Oh, what he wouldn't give for just one piece of fruit right now… As he tried to turn the knob to the final dead room, he felt a weak shaking hand on his forearm.

‘Hajime… Don’t… That’s not a good idea… I think.’

Chiaki was standing there, shaking. She must be aching too.

‘But, how else do we escape? We’ve checked everything else.’

‘It’s not worth it.’ She whispered, growing weaker. She would hurt herself if she exerted any more energy to stop him, so Hajime just let her pull her back upstairs. With nothing else to do, Hajime slept.

…

The fourth morning, Hajime stumbled down the stairs, again. He felt as though he would collapse at any moment, but he had to get to Monokuma tai chi. He would be killed if he doesn't get to Monokuma tai chi. What was worse? For once, that question stumped him.

‘Sonia! Are we on time?’ He weakly called out, as he ran into the rest of the girls.
‘Yes, it's ten minutes till seven. We will be on time.’ She sighed, eyeing the clock in the common room. Her natural leadership let her have the energy to drag her friends down to grape tower, even if it was not physically.

‘This better be the day we find an exit.’ Akane groaned hoarsely.

Be careful what you wish for.

…

‘NEKOMARU?!’ Screams rang out in Hajime’s ears. The piercing noise filled him with adrenaline, rushing forward to inspect what had happened. Grape tower was trashed, completely. The pillar had been knocked over somehow, the far door had been locked, and Nekomaru had been killed. Again. Nekomaru, the Ultimate Team Manager, had been killed. Again. What the fuck? Was this a sick joke? Just the other day, they were riding roller coasters together, laughing together, and now? The normally happy-go-lucky Akane had been brought to her knees, tears flooding over Nekomaru’s severed head. Are we all going to be driven insane, their friends dying over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over

The screams, the strong smell of oil, and the ringing of the body discovery announcement, sided with Hajime’s own weakness, caused him to faint. When he awoke, after a few minutes, milk was being shoved into his mouth.

‘Ah, you're okay…’ Chiaki whispered, letting out a sigh of relief.
‘What happ-’ Hajime started, before smelling the bread in front of him and stuffing it in his mouth. Oh, food, how I have missed you.

‘What happened?’ He muttered, still eating rabidly.

‘We’re allowed to eat now that the killing game has started again.’

‘Killing game?’ So, Nekomaru had been murdered. He couldn’t stop the killing game from continuing. He paused his desperate eating to sigh heavily. Of course he couldn’t stop it. But he had to admit to himself that he would have died if the culprit had waited any longer. So he silently thanked them. Very silently.

‘But the boys have been locked out. The elevator is broken, but Kazuichi is fixing it.’

‘How do you know?’

‘The phone in the common room connects to strawberry house. We can’t leave the funhouse until we find the culprit, apparently.’ She sighed. Hajime looked up at her with longing in her eyes, and she immediately understood. ‘All the boys are fine. Every single one of them.’

Hajime went back to eating, embarrassed Chiaki could read him so easily. After the girls had all finished eating, they stood up, energised, minus Akane. She claimed she would stay and investigate here, but it was obvious she just didn’t want to leave Nekomaru’s side. No one acknowledged this, of course.

Okay, time to get serious, Hajime! You’ve got work to do. But…

Hajime had been separated from him for too long. All alone in grape house, not being able to investigate, to visit… He felt energised now that he had eaten, but then… Why did he feel so weird?

He was thinking of him again… Of Nagito. He knew he wasn't really supposed to be, he was supposed to be suppressing his love. But, this wasn't his love and admiration that was making him feel so weird. This was something else. Oh, but he shouldn't be thinking this at all. His friend just died… Again. He had to investigate, to find justice like he had done before. How could he have forgotten that? Akane was crying in front of him, clutching Nekomaru’s remains, and the other girls were all off investigating. Yes, he should investigate too, not stand here.

But, why can't I think? Why can't I breathe? Is this like when Fuyuhiko had to come for me? No, this is different. I need to take a minute, like Fuyuhiko suggested I do when I feel stressed. I'm not sure this is stress, but it's worth a try.

So he made his way up the stairs, in order to try and calm himself down, to be better at investigating, he told himself. He made his way to his so-called mediocre room, and shut himself in. Why do I feel so hot? He found that he was sweating. He clutched the hem of his tie, and pulled, taking it off. But he found he was still short of breath. I wish Nagito were here, he thought. He would know what's wrong. He has always known what I was thinking, what I wanted. He always tended to my needs so well…

He thought of that day in the abandoned building, the way Nagito made him feel so fulfilled, so good… The way the relief washed over his face… The way they…

That's what the feeling was.
He was still so pent up, so… horny.

‘Fuck, not now…’

His friend had just died! (Albeit, for a second time) His friends were in mourning! The boys were investigating a murder! This wasn't the time to be thinking about Nagito’s erotic groans, his wet pink parted lips, his-

It was pointless.

‘I can be quick’

He rushed next to his bed, faced the wall in case someone were to walk in, and unbuttoned his trousers. He stood, one hand leaned above him on the wall, one unzipping desperately. He knew he shouldn't be doing this. But the forbiddenness of it all made it hotter. It was sick, he was disgusting, but it made it feel so good… There was a corpse two floors down, his friend was crying, and here he was, secretly relieving himself. It was awful, but it only turned him on more. Was there something wrong with him? But he wasn't thinking about that, he was thinking about the hair stuck to Nagito’s face as he dripped in sweat, sticky, lips parted and breath heavy. Hajime was stroking as fast as he could, his dick unbelievably erect. He was caressing his cock, stretching out his fingers and touching every inch, imagining it was Nagito’s own long nimble hands touching him. Whispering in his ear.

‘oh, hajime…’
‘hajime!’
‘h-hajime!!’

He felt nimble fingers grab hold of his shoulders, pulling him away from the wall, and slamming him back.

‘Hajime, are you alright? I thought I heard crying, and… oh my…’

Hajime suddenly found Nagito in his room, clutching his shoulders, pinning him to the wall. This Nagito was staring at his dick, and this Nagito had grown red in the face? Was he real? Or was he part of a fantasy?

But this Nagito quickly turned away, and rushed to shut the door, before turning back with his head down.

‘I-I am so sorry, H-hinata-kun. I did not mean to invade your personal… I was just so worried…’

Fuck, he was real. And he walked in on me touching myself to him?
Hajime quickly took his hand off his cock and tried stuffing it in his pants, before awkwardly realising he was too erect for that to be possible.

Against his better judgement, he realised that what he needed was right in front of him.

‘Nagito, wait. I need you.’ He rushed forward, grabbed Nagito by his collar, and shoved him toward the bed.

‘I can't handle this anymore, please. I need you.’ He was still erect, so he slowly walked toward the blushing boy in front of him, and gently pushed him on the bed, pinning him down.

‘Please…’

‘I need you too’

As soon as Hajime heard those words of consent his instincts kicked in and started to strip Nagito, finding him already erect. But he didn't have time for blushing. He turned the now naked boy in front of him, grabbed his ass and pulled him up. He slotted his knees around Nagito’s slim trembling legs.

‘Are you sure-’
‘Yes, please, now.’ he ordered.

Hajime grabbed Nagito’s hair with one hand, pulling his head up and using his other hand to cover his mouth. Before he could lose balance, he thrusted his cock into Nagito’s asshole, as hard as he could Hajime stifled a moan, while Nagito’s lack of one was explained by the hand tightly gripped over his mouth, fingernails digging into his cheek. The sudden thrust, raw, made tears stream down his face. He quickly checked the tears were happy ones, before quickly thrusting in again. It was desperate, and hungrier than usual. He didn't have time to think about how Nagito even got here, or the investigation he was supposed to be doing. He just pulled Nagito by the hair, more violently than he meant to, because he was losing control. He was close.

He thrusted again, knees squeezing tightly around Nagito's thighs. His dick was tightly slotted in and out, over and over, and the pressure was getting to be unbearable. His lips were bleeding from biting down to stifle his moans, and his cheeks were wet from hot tears. It only took the thought of how Nagito's face may look right now, since it was out of Hajime’s view, but he imagined it to be beautiful. That was enough, as he came in Nagito, not for the first time, and he hoped not for the last time. He heard something thick drip onto the puny mattress and realised Nagito had finished too. He removed his hands from Nagito’s mouth and hair, hearing a long breath being let out. With his remaining strength, he turned the boy over to look down at what he had done.

His cheeks were red and wet, lips parted and breathing heavily. His right cheek had some broken skin from where Hajime had gripped, and he was breathing heavily. His long white hair and t-shirt was stuck to his skin- he was drenched in sweat.

Just as he thought, beautiful.

‘I can’t hide it anymore. I love you Nagito, so much.’

‘Hajime! You’re not supposed to-’

‘I believe that this feeling can overcome despair. I can’t take this anymore, we shouldn’t have to be afraid of him! We can protect each other, I’m sure of it. I can protect you, you give me that strength.’ Hajime announced, suddenly. He meant every word. This wasn't spur of the moment, or a decision he would regret when the high of sex and love died down.

‘We can get out of here, but only if we support each other. We can’t do that while pretending to hate each other! Please, I can’t take being apart from you anymore… I need you. I know I’m asking a lot, and I’m putting you in danger, but I need to be selfish for a minute, because this is torture! My confession was terrible, but I love you! I need to say it, to shout it, loud and proud because it’s true! Everything about you, you make me a better person, you let me be myself, not to mention you’re beautiful, and really really good at sex…’ He added, before the blood rushed to his face, and he covered it with his still sweaty hands. He really did not need to add that last part, but it was said and done…

‘Oh, god what did I just say…’ He whispered, leaning back off of Nagito. The naked boy in front of him hadn’t said anything, rendered speechless by Hajime’s piece. He really feels that way, so strongly he’d put himself in danger? And the things he said?

‘Yes, you are being selfish Hajime.’ He started, sitting up and gently pulling the hands off Hajime’s face. ‘So you’ll have to let me be selfish too.’ he whispered, before leaning forward and planting a deep kiss on Hajime’s bleeding lips. He pulled away, not too far, letting their noses brush against each other, panting heavily.

‘That is the nicest most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me. Did you truly mean it?’

‘Y-yes…’

‘Then, I love you too, Hajime. I will believe in your hope that we can escape this place. I have so much to tell you about the investigation, and the findings, and ideas on how to escape, but weirdly they all seem pointless compared to your happiness right now… isn’t that strange?’ He whispered, not unlocking eyes, feeling each other's hot breath on the others lips.

‘No, it’s not strange at all.’ Hajime whispered back, before wrapping his arms round Nagito’s bare waist, pulling him close and kissing him deeply.

Fuck, there was no going back now.

Chapter Text

Part 15 - Chapter 4/Chapter 5

Nagito Komaeda was equally lucky and unlucky. Have rich parents? They die in a plane crash. You are the only survivor. You inherit almost billions, rivalling the Togami’s or even Towa’s. You get diagnosed with lymphoma and dementia, but you manage to survive it for ten years. What's the point of all that? Nagito didn’t really know, until now.

Get placed into a killing game? It's on a tropical island. Your classmates die? At least you are classmates with elites brimming with talent and hope. Get mentally tortured by a mechanical bear? You get to fight it with a boy you fell in love with. That one single lucky event, in his opinion, rivals every single unlucky thing that has happened on this island, or even his life.

Because here he was, asshole sore, cheeks bleeding, eyes wet with tears, but Hajime Hinata told him he loved him. So who cares that he had to play russian roulette with himself, solving puzzles and crawling through a tiny passage to find him. It was worth it, everything, to be in this moment, being kissed till he was breathless, smiling. Really smiling, for the first time since his parents died.

‘So, how'd you even get here? I thought the elevator to strawberry house was broken.’ Hajime broke their kiss, taking initiative to put their clothes back on; they still had an investigation to get to.

‘I went through the 八角形’
‘Huh? Ka-ku-kei….?’ You speak english?’

‘Haha, sorry. Only a little.’

‘It’s alright, you sounded cute.’ He shoved him playfully, and Nagito blushed. ‘But, wow… I feel like I'm the only person here who doesn’t speak any english. You're gonna make me look stupid in comparison…’ Hajime whined, while opening the door for Nagito.

‘I could never compare to you, Hajime. And, I said octagon.’ He smiled, giggling at his chivalry.
‘The octagon? You found it?’
‘Yes, it was in the final dead room. It was easy, really. I just had to play Russian roulette.’
‘What!? Russian roulette? You mean where you have a ⅛ chance of dying?! Nagito. You could have died!’
‘⅛? I thought you were only supposed to leave one slot!’ Nagito chuckled, not seeing the severity of his actions. His luck struck again, it seemed.

‘Oh God… Nagito… Well, I’m glad you're safe. But don’t be stupid again! I don’t know what I'd do if you…’ Hajime stopped walking, grabbing Nagito’s hands and looking into his eyes with severity. ‘Promise me you won’t do anything stupid!’

‘I…’ There was still so much he needed to achieve. He still needed to find the traitor, and he hadn’t read the student profiles in the report he found… He ought to do that soon, to find out who the traitor is. But now that Hajime had expressed his love for him, if the traitor's identity was in there, he didn’t want to be the one to bring despair to Hajime. To know that one of your dear friends was a traitor working for the accursed Future Foundation…? With Monokuma…? Oh, Hajime would be devastated. So he hadn’t read it yet, and didn’t know if he should. For now, he had to protect Hajime, even if that meant lying to him. So he wore a big smile, and whispered softly:

‘I promise.’

Hajime just smiled, kissing him on the cheek before starting again toward the stairs. That was the first lie he had told on this island… First real lie anyway. And it stung, but he had to do what must be done, no matter the cost.

…

‘Guys! Look who I found!’ Hajime happily called out to his friends who were investigating the elevator.
‘Ah, Nagito! Are you alright?’
‘Yes, I am okay. Your concern should be targeted elsewhere, Nevermind-san.’
‘Are you sure, Nagito…?’ Chiaki whispered softly.
‘But, you’re walking funny. And your face…’ Sonia started, before interrupted by a blushing Hajime.

‘Uh, he just got hurt crawling through the tunnel!’
‘What tunnel?’ A freshly calmed down Akane wondered aloud.

As he frantically objected, he started to explain the final dead room, and the octagon - before Nagito could tease him about not knowing English again…

Almost the second he had finished explaining, the elevator they were standing in front of opened, and Kazuichi popped out in excitement.

‘Yo! I fixed it!’ He squealed, hands in the air and clutching onto Hajime.
‘Hell yeah you did!’ He humoured, patting him on the back. Kazuichi just chuckled, before seeing a glaring Nagito from behind his shoulders, and backed away awkwardly.

‘So, didja find anything?’

-Bing bong, Ding dong-

‘Ah, whatever, just tell me in the trial. You got this!’

‘Yeah… I hope so.’

…

‘Sonia, please, it’s okay. He did it for us.’ Hajime stuttered, holding a wailing Sonia in her room. Hajime just so happened to be standing next to her when Monokuma announced the verdict, and she had collapsed into him, crying ever since. He shot Nagito an apologetic look, who returned with an understanding nod, before limping back to his own cottage. (Hajime really put a lot of effort into not laughing at the notion of his leaving Nagito unable to walk. Now was not the time.) He had brought Sonia back to her cottage, Kazuichi giving up on following her since he knew he wasn't wanted, but Chiaki and Akane followed closely. However, along the way, Akane had grown weak in the knees, likely emotionally drained herself. Chiaki had volunteered to take her back.

So Hajime was stuck comforting the sobbing princess, who had manoeuvred her way into practically cuddling into the disgruntled boy. It would be cute, if she wasn’t crying breathlessly. So all he could do was awkwardly pat her head, trying to convince her - and himself - that he had died for a good cause. Because looking at the four so-called “dark devas” huddled up in Gundham’s discarded blood-ridden scarf, it was too much of a burden to bear. This poor girl had just arrived in the country, ready for a so-called “teenage adventure” and now? It was so unfair.

And he found himself crying in her arms too.

‘Hajime, you are a wonderful friend. Please do not shed any tears on my accord.’
‘No, no… I…’
‘I know. Thank you for staying, Hajime. Please note I do not mean to make anyone jealous.’
Hajime blushed, before realising the situation he had gotten himself in.
‘Ah, I wasn’t thinking of anything like that at all! And, honestly, he won't mind.’
‘He won’t? I saw him glaring at Kazuichi earlier… and- Oh, is that too much information?!’ She stifled, turning up to look at Hajime with a polite hand covering her mouth.
‘No, uh… we decided to not hide it anymore. It was too hard… for me, mostly.’ He admitted, leaning back now that the tears were starting to subside. Sonia placed herself next to him, facing the roof. No more touching - the moment had passed. But it was nice for them to know each other's comfort was there if they needed it. (Plus, Sonia was right: Nagito was the type to glare.)

‘Really? How did you come to that decision?’
He blushed again at the thought of their encounter in his room, but Sonia wasn’t crying anymore, and he sure as hell wasn’t gonna ruin it.
‘It’s hard to explain. Something about love being stronger than despair…? H-his words, of course!’
‘Mhm, of course.’ She teased, before her curiosity took over:
‘You love him?’
‘I… Yeah, I think I do.’
‘I sympathise with your efforts to hide it. Losing someone you care for is a lot harder than losing merely a classmate. I do not know how to go on, anymore.’
‘You…?’ Hajime started, but stopped himself immediately. Of course, of course. The blushing, the excitement, it mirrored his and Nagito’s private moments in a way. He should have guessed. Now he would never have the chance to tease either of them. That fact alone stung enough for him to understand that this must remain unspoken. If it was painful for Hajime, think of how she must feel…

‘I think… He would be thankful that his own ice princess is watching over his dark devas.’ Hajime smiled, softly, in a whisper. This notion made Sonia’s tears start to flow again, but when her arms wrapped back around him, he knew they were less despairful. She was smiling, weakly, but smiling as the tears trickled down her puffed aching cheeks.

She would be okay, eventually.

If this situation happened to him? That was a whole different story. But now, he had a friend who needed him. So he pushed his worries aside.

…

‘Oooh, what do we have here?’

Hajime had stayed on the floor of Sonia’s cottage last night, keeping her company. However, Kazuichi’s teasing was the last thing she needed.

‘Just because we're walking in at the same time doesn’t mean anything, Kaz.’
‘Uh-huh, uh-huh, I see you!’ He chuckled, and Hajime couldn’t shut it down fast enough.
‘Only person that would do something so gross is you, Kaz.’
‘Miss Sonia isn’t gross, how dare you!’
‘But taking advantage of a grieving girl, is. Shut it.’
With that, Kazuichi backed down, and Sonia snuck a grateful nod, before moving to talk to the rest of the girls. There being: Only two others. Seriously?

Himself, Nagito, Fuyuhiko, Kazuichi, Akane, Chiaki, and Sonia? Is that it? Seven people? The cafeteria, once bustling to the brim with rowdy teenagers, was almost silent now, everyone eating breakfast without speaking a word. Fucking depressing.

As Hajime started on his food with Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi, he noticed a very lonely, bruised (hickey filled) Nagito eating alone, and beckoned him over.

‘Dude!’ Kazuichi spat under his breath.
‘Shut up.’ Fuyuhiko stomped on his foot as hard as he could, and Kazuichi bent over in a wince.

With a lot of effort, Nagito plopped down onto the seat next to him, and Hajime gripped his hand under the table, causing him to blush. He leaned over to whisper as quietly as he could:

‘I’m sorry I made you so sore.’ The statement along with the hot breath on his ear causing his skin to almost dew, made Nagito flush a pristine pink. But he snapped back, whispering in turn.

‘It’s okay, I understand you were feral for me.’ Hajime flushed a deep crimson in turn, and turned away, stuffing food in his mouth before he could make any non consensual whines.

Fuyuhiko simply raised an eyebrow in a sort of disgusted endearance - Kazuichi didn’t seem to notice.

‘So, you seriously weren’t with Sonia all night? Don’t lie to me dude.’ A very swift kick was placed on Kazuichi’s shin.
‘Hikoooo, that hurts…’ He whined, but still turned to Hajime for an answer.

‘I told you, drop it. We just talked, Kaz. She was upset. Don’t be a perv. I slept on the floor.’ He spat, not amused. He simply squeezed Nagito’s hand as tightly as he could, before taking a turn to kick Kazuichi in the shins.

‘Okay, okay, jeez… So violent…’ He moaned, but was satisfied with his answer. Hajime just hoped for everyone’s sake that he would drop it. He turned back to look at Nagito, and all he found was a smile. Was he really not jealous? He was expecting a glare, or at least a frown, but… it was almost as if he was unfazed. Ah, well, at least he is happy.

…

Nagito’s night had a similar aura of despair. First off, he was in pain, and a lot of it. Limping back to his cottage all alone was not a small feat, but he tried not to think about why. Maybe what they had done earlier in the day was not the best idea, but it’s not like he could get pregnant, right?

Anyway, if the others found out what they had done… They would only be disgusted. He knew he wasn’t the only perpetrator, but he liked to think that Hajime wouldn’t have done that, not when there was an investigation going on. Not when Hajime’s friends were working hard. But… It was so… good. As he showered that night, all he could really admit to himself, was that he didn’t really care. Because that moment in grape house was one of the happiest in his life! Hajime Hinata: loved him! It was undeniable, he had practically shouted it. And he wanted to fight Monokuma together, there was not much else he could ask for. However, as he got out of the shower, and limped to his bed, his eyes lingered on the thick book with a Hope's Peak logo he had found in the final dead room. Wrapping his unruly hair in a towel so as to not get water droplets on the thick leather cover, he set the book down on his lap.

He hadn’t read it yet, since he knew what it contained. He knew it would contain Hajime’s talent, and possibly a way off this island. Should he read it with Hajime? He would surely appreciate it, but…

He didn’t want to be dishonest to him, or any of his classmates, but… as he opened the book, he practically told his second lie of his duration on Jabberwock.

The first page was an introduction to Hope's Peak, an explanation on the talent scouting program, and Nagito skipped it over, all things that had been given to him before orientation anyway. (Not that he ever made it to orientation) Then he found everyone’s student profiles, in alphabetical order. The first one of note he found was ‘Hinata’.

As he scanned the page, he saw things he knew. His name, age, but then…

“Notes: Reserve course student of Hope's Peak academy”
In the space that would normally occupy one’s Ultimate Talent, was the words: reserve course student. What? He recalled hearing about this course, one where idiotic rich kids could pay an unimaginable fee to attend Hope’s peak. Idiotic rich kid? Hajime? No, it couldn't be. It must be a lie, yes, a lie by Monokuma.

‘Monokuma, please, is this a joke?’ He shouted to no one in particular, but with no answer, no creepy laugh, he knew it had to be real. Hajime… had no talent? He just got here by being rich? So he didn’t even deserve the spot in this class…?

Nagito didn’t know how to feel. He had always hated the prospect of a reserve course, freeloaders who just wanted to leech off of real talent. But was Hajime really like that? He was sweet, kind, attentive… Always humble. Maybe he knew? No, he would tell him. Hajime was everything but dishonest.

He placed the book down for a moment, and clutched his head in his hands. How was he supposed to feel? What did he feel? It was overwhelming, truly, so he stood up and decided to dry his hair, taking his mind off it for a moment. His efforts were in vain, however, as the words “reserve course student” spiralled in his mind like a typhoon. Hajime was everything Nagito stood against, yet, Hajime was perfect. Nagito loved him, he wasn’t supposed to feel such… disgust.

Disgust? No, no, I mustn’t feel disgusted! That doesn’t make any sense, I care for him dearly! I love him, genuinely! Disgust doesn’t hold a candle to the adoration I feel! Right?

Maybe the Hajime before this island was everything Nagito stood against, but now? He was perfect, the epitome of hope. Maybe he was an exception? He hoped that would be true. He just needed to wave the disgust away. Hajime wasn’t lowly, or a leech, no! That just wasn’t the Hajime he knew, the Hajime he loved.

He truly wished he hadn’t read that profile.

‘I must forget about it. I must act casual. Hajime trusts me, for whatever reason, so I must act the part of the lover he wishes me to be.’ He determinedly whispered to himself. He did enjoy being his lover, anyway, so it wouldn’t be a tough task. Just until he found out more, until they got their stolen memories back. Until he knew for sure that the Hajime he had come to know was the real Hajime.

Okay, time to move on to the next page. He waved the typhoon of thoughts away, and got back to reading.
‘In alphabetical order, it shall be… I.’ He scanned the page, looking for the name of the next person, and his eyes locked on the words: “Ultimate Imposter”. Huh?

The profile was completely blank, no picture, no age, only a short description.

“We have no information on The Ultimate Imposter, only that they always take the face and identity of an existing person(s). Age: Unknown. Name: Unknown. Previous known aliases: Mitarai Ryota, Togami Byakuya”

Byakuya? Our Byakuya? Nagito quickly skipped ahead in the profiles, looking for ‘T’, and found only Tsumiki. Well, that was indeed interesting… but Nagito supposed it made sense. He knew of the Togami’s, supposedly the real Byakuya was a year younger than the rest of the class anyway, and was less… pudgy, so to speak.

So he quickly moved on, making a note of it in his mind. Next came a new chapter, called “The Neo World Program”. Oh?

Nagito quickly started to read, his attention being held like a hostage at gunpoint.
“The Neo World Program is a program developed by the Future Foundation.”
Future foundation again? Like the symbol on the ancient ruin!
“Developed by the Ultimate Therapist: Gekkogahara Miaya using the technology founded by the late Ultimate Programmer: Fujisaki Chihiro”
Late, huh?
“The purpose of the Neo World Program is to rehabilitate Remnants of Despair, (see pg.67 for more information).” Nagito tried his best to not turn the page just yet. “Currently, the program is habilitating one ‘Teacher’ role, and 15 ‘remnant’ roles, along with one ‘classmate’ role to help settle in the remnants and hopefully make it easier for them to convert. This role is played by [REDACTED REDACTED]”

‘Of course it’s not that easy’ Nagito sighed, but continued on.

“To convert by which we mean, to acquire so called ‘hope fragments’, and developing bonds with one another. The Neo World Program erases all memory of the Remnants' time under the influence of Enoshima, along with the state of their physical selves before that time, and it hopes to develop enough of their personalities so that when they exit the island, their fond memories of Jabberwock replace the time they were under despair. This theory has not been tested yet, only being tested currently by [Stupid idiot face!!], a future foundation branch 14 member, additionally, an alumni of Hope’s Peak, and the one who defeated Enoshima.”

It seemed Monokuma had some influence over this report.

“Now, [Amazing handsome Monokuma is running an awesome killing game! Puhuhu!]”

‘Great.’ Nagito sighed. It seemed that was the end of actual good information, although that really was a treasure trove. But he was not done just yet, turning to the aforementioned page 67.

“Remnants of Despair. Future Foundation uses this term to refer to the followers of Enoshima Junko, the Ultimate Despair, who brought on the Biggest, most Awful, most Tragic event in Human History, commonly referred to as just ‘The Tragedy’. Although she was defeated by [REDACTED], these remnants carry on her will by inflicting despair on the world. Their casualties are in the millions, taking over entire countries. Some believe it is best to destroy them, while others^[Stupid heads!!] believe they can be redeemed. The cause of their fall into despair is unknown, however witnesses believe them to be members of class 77 of the esteemed Hope’s Peak Academy.”

As his eyes found no more words, Nagito shut the report, and slowly lifted it down onto his lap. He tried to let the information wash over him slowly, but it hit him like a truck.

‘We are all Despair. Every single one of us…?’ He winced, letting his face fall into his arms.
‘No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no-’

No, it couldn’t be true. Every single one of his classmates followed this “Enoshima”? They had killed people, even him? Even… Hajime? The book looked official enough, maybe some things added in by Monokuma, but… It was all true. Every single one of them was evil, though they didn’t remember it. This whole island was supposed to rehabilitate them… except for one of us. Except for the traitor. There was exactly one good person on this island, and unfortunately, it wasn’t him. And he hated to admit it, but it was likely not Hajime, either. He wanted to say this didn’t make any sense, but unfortunately, it did.

They were all horrid people, excuses for humans, they had just forgotten it. They were living in ignorance, and Nagito was the only one who knew it. Hajime and himself had only fallen in love because of the bubble of ignorance they were living in - it was not even real. His stupid fantasies of them ever going on that date died in that moment. He was disgusted before, but now?

He sprinted to his bathroom, hurling into his toilet. The stomach acid he had refluxed through his empty stomach stung, but he didn’t feel it. It was nothing in comparison to this.

‘Monokuma!’

‘Puhuhu, I see you finally read your prize!’

‘Can I ask you if this is true?’

‘Of course it is. What, disappointed that your amazing sex life with Hinata is as good as over? How stupid can you be, it’s all true.’

Nagito scowled, and tears welled in his eyes. Tomorrow, he would have to put on a poker face. No reactions, no emotion, act casual. Enjoy what little time he had left as a fellow classmate and Hajime’s love. Savour it, because now, he had to plan. After that, it would all be over.

‘Don’t bother providing a motive. I already have one, and I plan to act.’

Chapter Text

Part 16 - Chapter 5

Since Nagito had his realisation, no one noticed any change, except for Hajime. He was acting perfectly normal to the outside, no changes. But Hajime knew something was different, although he couldn't pin down what. Was he upset? Was he happy? He genuinely couldn't tell, and it scared him.

On other matters, a new island had opened up again. Hajime had tired of hoping that there was going to be something useful, but he searched anyway, with Fuyuhiko. He wanted to do it with Nagito, but… uh… he was still, well…

Use lube, kids.

‘So, are you going to tell Kaz?’
‘Huh?’

They were walking along the island, investigating a weird factory, but since they concluded there was nothing of use, they just sat down and took a break.

‘Why?’
‘cause I'm pretty sure he's the only one that doesn't know.’
‘It’s just so… embarrassing.’ Hajime mumbled, fiddling with the grass between his fingers.
‘And Nagito’s acting weird right now, I don’t want to bother him by asking about relationship stuff.’
‘You mean the limping?’ Fuyuhiko asked, nodding his head to the side as if he were a kitten. Too innocent.
Hajime blushed, and sputtered: ‘I-I… No, not that.’
‘Are you sure? He seems pretty hurt. Did someone do that to him?!’ He started, hands forming into fists, seemingly ready to beat up whoever hurt his best friend's boyfriend.
‘Hey, woah! I mean, not technically, but uh… kinda… I mean, it doesn't matter, that’s not what I was talking about!’ His face was almost maroon at this point.

Hajime would die if Fuyuhiko knew.

‘I just mean, he’s standoffish, and a little distant. Like when I was talking about Sonia, he didn’t say anything! I’m just worried, he’s had health problems in the past, and…’

‘And now that someone beat him up you're worried about his health?’
‘Omigosh he wasn’t beat up! It was me!’ He frustratedly spat.
‘Wait, what?! YOU beat him up?! Because he looks really really bad, dude!’ Fuyuhiko stood up, angry. ‘What is wrong with you?!’

And yes, he was right. He really did look awful. And technically, it was all Hajime’s fault, but not like that! Jeez, this was NOT the point at all! He had other things to worry about, things they ACTUALLY needed to talk about, so unfortunately, he needed to clear up misunderstandings as soon as possible.

‘It was consensual, okay…? Can we please drop it, this is stupid now.’ Hajime whispered, burying his face in his hands.

‘Wait..’ Fuyuhiko started, before he felt a light pink rush to his cheeks. ‘Oh God, Hajime. Hajime! Hajime. Hajime. Hajime!’ Fuyuhiko almost squealed, punching him in the arm playfully. ‘You fucking ravaged him, Jesus Christ! You're an animal! I can’t say I’m not proud…’ He laughed, and Hajime just frowned, blushing deeply.

‘So can we PLEASE drop it now?!’ He whined.
‘No fucking way, dude, this is hilarious. It’s like you fucking tried to murder him! Have you seen him? What, did you go in raw or something?! When the hell did you even have time for that?!’

‘It doesn’t matter when! God, this is so embarrassing.’
‘Okay, okay. I’m done. I promise.’ He sighed, letting his laughter die out. ‘What is it you actually meant?’
‘It doesn’t matter, it’s probably nothing, anyway.’
‘Well, if you're seriously worried, just talk to him. You guys are good together, I think you could fix it if you tried. Not that I know what the issue is.’
‘Yeah…’

And maybe he was right. There was a lot to worry about, a lot to think about, but not much to do. They needed a plan to leave the island, but it wasn’t going to show up out of the blue. So he was going to enjoy it. He was on a tropical island for god’s sake! He might as well have a good time.

…

After a very brisk walk with Fuyuhiko, he headed to Nagito’s cottage, and swiftly knocked. Please be home, please be home.

‘Hajime?’
He barged in, keeping his gift behind his back, almost hopping.
‘Hi Nagito!’ He cheered, entirely filled with blissful ignorance.
‘Haha, hello, Hajime. Why are you so… Chipper?’ He chuckled. As bad of a mood he was in right now, seeing Hajime so exasperated made his worries temporarily wash away. He was still holding the poison he had found, and quickly shoved it in his pocket. -I hope he does not stay long, I have to put this in the fridge.-

‘No reason, I just thought… why wait?’ He smiled, handing him a small hand picked bouquet of flowers. It was limp, and flimsy, only having daisies and a few fairy breaths, but to Nagito, it was perfect. He felt tears well in his eyes, and Hajime panicked.
‘Ah! I’m sorry! Is it too much?’ He cried, clutching Nagito’s wet cheeks.
‘No, no, I am just.. So happy, Hajime. Thank you.’ He smiled. But that was his third lie.

Hajime blushed, shoving the flowers into his chest.
‘I thought that, uh… we could try and go on that date? Uh… now?’ He spoke softly, as if Nagito was a beast he didn’t want to disturb.
‘I would honestly love that, Hajime. Just, um… Can I get ready first?’
‘Oh! O-of course, sorry!’ He muttered, hopping back out the door. ‘Sorry I just barged in…’
‘It is alright. Where shall we meet?’
‘Can I pick you up? After the Monokuma announcement?’
‘That is sweet, but you don’t have to do that…’
‘But, I want to. Honestly! I was under the impression that your self-deprecating days were over…?’ Hajime teased.
‘Ah, well… It is hard to shake off a lifelong habit…’
‘It’s alright, just let me take care of you sometimes…’

As the both chuckled to themselves, Hajime planted a quick peck on his pink cheek, before walking- no, skipping - away.

‘He said yes! Fuck yes!’

…

Nagito’s third lie was not that he wasn’t happy about Hajime’s preposition, or his pathetic flowers. It was implying that his tears were happy ones. In reality, they were tears of guilt. How could he ever have felt disgust toward such a sweet and wonderful boy. He brought him hand-picked flowers, for no reason! He kissed him on the cheek, and is taking him out tonight! He watched as he hopped and skipped like that of a school child, all in the prospect of going out with him. HIM. Nagito. The one that wanted to hate him. The one that couldn't fully trust him. The one he was going to betray.

Should he even go through with his plan? He had already brought a fridge to his room now, and prepared the fire bombs. He was in the factory now, placing them. All he had to do was set off the bomb in the cafeteria, so no one would suspect he only had one real one. He had recorded his videos and set up the laptop, so the only actual step left was to actually start the process of betrayal.

But Hajime asking him on a date was not part of the plan. He planned to distance himself, so Hajime wouldn’t feel as bad when he left. But if he went on this date? Why, Nagito would fall in love with him all over again, and it would be that much harder to die for his cause.

But… He was going to die soon, right? So it would only be fair if the universe granted him one final wish. So that day, he once again decided to be selfish.

…

‘YOU AND NAGITO? ARE YOU FOR REAL RIGHT NOW? ARE YOU MAKING THIS UP?’
Kazuichi screamed, while Fuyuhiko just burst out with laughter.
‘Dude, you are the last one to know. Even Hiyoko figured it out!’ He snorted, knowing that Hajime wouldn’t mind the mention.
‘BUT…! NAGITO? WHY?’ He screeched, in utter disbelief.
‘It doesnt fucking matter why, we’re his friends and were helping him.’ Fuyuhiko growled, laughter fading immediately and smacking Kazuichi on the back of the head.
‘Uh… Thanks, Hiko…’
The three boys were in Hajime’s cottage, Fuyuhiko trying to brush down unruly spikes while explaining Hajime and Nagito’s relationship to him, trying to convince him to help his friend get ready for his big date.

‘And, get this, they were the ones that made the rule!’
‘ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME?!’ He screeched again, his voice cracking. Fuyuhiko just continued to roar with laughter.
‘And, and-!’
‘Hiko, I swear…’ Hajime interrupted. He was NOT going to speak about the cause of Nagito’s injury under any circumstances.
‘And what?! Nothing else could possibly shock me at this point!’
‘Oh, it could…’ Fuyuhiko mumbled, as Hajime stomped on his foot.
‘What! What is it! You gotta tell me now, c’mon, Hajiiiiiii…’
‘That is the stupidest nickname I ever heard.’
‘Pleeeeease’ Kazuichi begged, fluttering his eyelashes like a D*sney princess.
‘Yeah, Hajiiiii, pleeeeease let me tell him!’ Fuyuhiko joined, stopping his pointless effort to calm the storm that was Hajime’s spiky hair to join Kazuichi’s pleading.

‘Okay, if I tell you, will you help me make something for him?’
‘Anything!’
‘And you won’t tell anyone!’
‘Not a soul!’
‘Fine… Hiko, tell him.’

‘Okay, so get this. You saw Nagito limping, and the bruises? That was our boy right there! He ravaged him from head to toe! He’s an animal!’

‘Jesus Christ Hiko, did you have to describe it like that?!’
‘WHAT.’ Kazuichi just let out in disbelief.
‘Okay we’re changing the subject now!’ Hajime stuttered with a thick blush plastered on his cheeks.
‘No, no, no… I want details!’
‘We should drop it, he's sensitiveeeee’ Fuyuhiko continued to tease, going to tie up a small black tie to replace his green one.
‘Tell me later?’
‘Kaz, that’s all he told me.’
‘Oh for goodness sake.’

‘Guys! I can’t just tell you every detail. I haven’t been given permission.’
The boys just sighed, defeated.
‘Fine, fine. What am I making?’
‘A bracelet, just a thin one. Silver, if you can.’
‘Dude, is that it?! That’ll take me like 20 minutes. Wow, that was not a fair trade.’ Kazuichi smirked.
‘Wait, that’s it? No engraving or anything?’
‘Yeah, I could add like H plus N or something!’
‘Ooh, or Mr and Mr Hinata!’
‘Guys! We’re not even dating yet!’ A light blush dusting his cheeks, but he smiled nonetheless. He was going to have a good time tonight, and a good life afterwards. And these two were NOT making a toast at their wedding.

…

‘Komaedaaa! It’s me!’
Sonia shouted outside Nagito’s cottage. It seemed she was getting used to Japanese mannerisms.

Nagito quickly shut the laptop he was recording on and shoved it under his bed. He would have to record another take later, but why was Sonia here? He quickly opened the door, bowing as he did.

‘Your highness. What could possibly urge you to grace me with a visit?’
‘Oh, Komaeda, you tease. We’re friends! I’m here to help you get ready!’
‘Get ready?’
‘Oh my, you haven’t forgotten, have you?’
‘W-wait… But, I never told you…’
‘O-oh! I am sorry! Hajime did! But please, do not direct any anger toward him, he was just trying to help. He sent me over to help since the other boys are helping him right now! He just thought you might benefit from a second opinion, or just an extra hand.’
‘Ah… He is so considerate it is almost sickly… But, we’re friends?’
‘Of course we are! I also came here of my own volition!’
‘But…’
‘He said you may react this way… Just sit back and relax! He explained that you hurt yourself crawling through the tunnel in the funhouse and he didn;t want you to exert yourself. I can help with your hair, running errands, picking up clothes, anything!’
‘Crawling through the tunnel…’
‘You have the right to refuse my help, of course! I don’t mean to be a bother!’
‘No, no, Nevermind-san. You never could be. I suppose you may have more expertise on this matter.’
‘Splendid!’ She cupped her hands together in poise, smiling widely.
‘So, what is it you think I should do?’
‘Well, for a start, what is the plan? Where are you going?’
‘I haven’t been privy to that… It’s a surprise.’
‘Ooh! Romantic!’
‘You really don’t mind me being with your friend? Aren’t you afraid I would weigh him down with my own incompetence?’
‘Don’t be silly, you bring out the best in him. As he was explaining, he was so happy, happier than I had seen him since Hiyoko… or ever, really.’ Nagito smiled, turning away.
‘Ah, well if that’s the case, I shall put some effort into looking nice. Could you give me some guidance, Nevermind?’
‘Please, call me Sonia.’
‘Uh… S-sonia?’
‘Of course! Let’s make you look smart and sophisticated!’ She almost shrieked. She had never had the honour of conducting a makeover, and she was very excited.

…

‘So, what do you think?’
Sonia hadn’t really done much, just simply finding a Hope’s Peak sweater and putting it on top of his red-symbolled t-shirt. She had tied the back of his hair into two small plaits, leaving his wispy spikes alone. She just thought to herself - Hajime would like anything, as long as Nagito still looked like Nagito. Fortunately, she was right.

‘It is wonderful, Sonia. Thank you!’

-Ding dong, Bing bong-

Shit. He had forgotten all about his preparations! And it was already time for his date. He still had to record his videos, and the bomb hadn't even been set up yet!

‘Well, I shall be off before Hajime gets here! Good luck!’ She waved, strolling past his startled look and out the door, not noticing at all.

Well, it’s too late now. Put it out of your mind, you are going to have a good time tonight. For Hajime’s sake.

Chapter Text

I am sorry everyone, but I cannot continue writing Does Love Lift Up Despair. A lot has happened to me in the past month, and it has changed my view of the world, and therefore my writing style, drastically. I feel like whole new person, honestly - that isn't a bad thing. But if I tried to keep writing it wouldn't match the tone of the rest. You may not believe how much I have changed in a month, but trust me.

However, I do not dare leave anyone on a cliff hanger. Here is what would have happened - roughly:

The date would be bittersweet. They would both think the other is equally beautiful. They would kiss, of course, but it would be their final one. Hajime would sense something is up, but he wouldn't press. That decision would haunt him. The next morning, the bomb in the hotel lobby would set off, but Nagito wouldn't be there. He couldn't face his classmates. All he left was a video message of what he said in-game, so roughly the same. No choking by Akane, though haha.

They would start a rapid search for the bombs, not before a large panic attack from Hajime. He states he could have prevented this if he had just pressed on Nagito last night. Fuyuhiko, Sonia and Chiaki are there for him, especially.

They find the scrubbed out message in Nezumi castle, then the second video message in the factory. They successfully manage to decipher that the bomb isn't real, and head to the warehouse as instructed.

Unfortunately, it is too late.

‘Nagito, you fucking idiot.’ He would mutter, before bellowing an ear piercing scream. He would scream for hours. There was no stopping it. It would be out of control. He would peel the skin off of his face, crying at his side until there was an unfortunate ‘ding dong bing bong’ and he would be dragged away. He would pass out from the constant screaming.

The trial would be so difficult to write honestly. He would be distraught, his friends doing most of the work for him. Hajime would be so completely distraught. But as they got closer to the truth, and Chiaki’s identity would be revealed, he would start to get very very angry. He would scream, and have to be restrained.

Chiaki would apologise over and over, but it was for naught. Because Hajime broke free, and… well. He wanted to punch Chiaki, he wanted to kill Monokuma. But all he could fathom to do… was beg for voting time.
After the vote, Hajime would say to Chiaki:

‘Chiaki, I trusted you.’
‘I-’
‘No, listen. I trusted you. Fully. Completely. I know this was an accident. But I can’t forgive you. If you even had a small part of orchestrating this, I can never forgive you. You need to tell me right now, the truth. What is the future foundation - what did Nagito die for?’

And so she tells him. But only him. And he understands every one of Nagito’s actions, but he also doesn't. All he can do is cry. With what little strength he has left, he embraces Chiaki tightly.

‘I don’t forgive you, but… I get it. He would have wanted me to forgive you, but. If we’re all bad… I just… I don’t know. I didn’t ask for any of this. For Kamakura. For Nagito. For any of this.’

He then turns to Monokuma, in defiance.

‘Why did you let me fall in love? What benefit did it bring you, knowing we’d find out that it was for naught anyway?’

‘Because of the despair it would bring you.’ His voice didn’t sound like his own.
‘Because you can only have despair if hope lifts it higher. There has been a world where you fell for him, and there's been a world where you have not. In both, you feel despair, but in the world you fall, you fall into despair so much harder. It is simple, really. Could you not have guessed that?’

The rest of the students are quite confused, but they huddle up beside Hajime, protecting their friend. Begging him to stop. All he does is declare punishment time. Chiaki and Monomi get pulled away. And…

Hajime.

He dies alongside Chiaki, enveloped in despair.

Chiaki tries to stop him, but there's nothing she can do. He couldn’t take it anymore.

…

They all awaken one at a time, Hajime’s eyes open to find a crying Sonia and a totally-not-crying Fuyuhiko, thrilled that he is alive. They explained what had happened. That they had escaped. (I would have written this btw there wouldn’t have been a timeskip.) They escaped with the memory of him. Fuyuhiko slaps him in the face, calling him the biggest idiot he ever saw, before embracing him tightly. He quickly rises out of his pod, remembering why Fuyuhiko was even crying(not) in the first place. Nagito was stirring to life.

‘You idiot.’
‘Hajime!’
They kiss deeply and excitedly, thrilled.

‘What happened?’
‘They revived us! We aren't remnants!’
‘What? How do you know about that? What do you mean: us?’
‘I… Chiaki was the traitor, but she wasn’t evil. And she told me everything before… we died.’
‘Who- what- Hajime!’
Hajime softly explained his actions, before Nagito just squeezed him tightly.
‘You are considerably stupider than I thought. All that distress, over me? I am sitting right here, perfectly healthy. Hajime, you mustn't worry anymore.’
‘I love you.’
‘I adore you.’
‘Thank you, but say it back or I’m getting back in the pod.’
‘Alright, alright. I love you too.’

They slowly revive the rest of their friends, Hajime ecstatic when he finally gets to see Hiyoko again.

Eventually, the events of Danganronpa 3 happen, and they get to all live happily together, on Jabberwock, free of guilt and free of despair.

Sorry if that was rushed, but like i said, my writing style has greatly decreased now that i intendto write different things.
I hope you cried, I hope youre not too angry. I hope that was a satisfying conclusion in some way. And I am not giving up! I am basically going to rewrite this story, but in a more slow-burn less smutty sort of way. It will still be komahina, it will kind of always be komahina… thank you for all the support i have received, it made my days and months. Thank you all so much. And does love lift up despair? Yeah… but like,,, never give into despair guys!!! Or something.. Im a dork sorry 3