Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

William Wisp stepped outside, the cool april breeze blew straight through his black zip-up hoodie and up his spine. It whipped up his already messy black hair, pushing it over his eyes so he could no longer see. He grabbed both sides of his hood and pulled it up over his head and put both hands in his hoodie pockets. 

Despite all the students rushing past him into the school building, William stood still like a pebble in a stream, parting the trickle of students. Today was a normal day for all of them. Not for William— today was the morning of April 16th, the beginning of the day that he was going to kill himself.  

—--

After hearing the bell ring, William moved his feet and began to step up to the doors of the large building. There were still a few students in the halls still but William slinked past them and into his homeroom. He found an empty desk on the side and slid discreetly into it, not making eye contact with anyone. 

Despite how he must look from the outside– pale, depressed, edgy, awkward— William was feeling much better today. It felt like a weight was lifted off his mind. He was finally able to view things around him with a sense of curiosity, thinking clearer and more subjective now that he decided he was going to die. It didn’t matter how much he sucked if everything was going to be solved tonight. 

He raised his head and looked from underneath his long bangs at all the students laughing and talking to one another. Funny, he never had got a good look at them before. They look so young and unreal. Like characters from a movie, not actual people that he could interact with. They moved and laughed like they were behind a glass and he was invisible, left to merely observe them. He realized that he already felt dead, not much was going to change when he died tonight. 

— 

He ate lunch in the bathroom today. One last time to enjoy all his favorite highschool experiences, he thought bitterly. 

William looked around him with fondness at the familiar doodles on the walls around him. He was going to miss the carved penis that was scribbled over and transformed into an impressive drawing of King Julien from Madagascar. Other various self-deprecations were deeply scratched into the other sides of the wall. “I HATE myself”, “Schol SuX”, or “kiLL me”. 

William stared at them like it was a mirror. He inwardly laughed at the irony of what he was planning to do. If statements like these littered the bathroom stalls there there was no guessing what made him hate living. Or what made him so bitter. Deadwood was filled with depressed kids, but unlike actual dead, no one cared when they went silent. Sure, the hypocrites acted surprised when other kids killed themselves. They asked “How could this happen?” “Who could have guessed?” Like they weren't the culprits, ignoring their own fist holding the murder weapon till another and another kid fell to the same fate. 

William hoped his parents would not blame themselves. He had been mentally drafting his note for the past month, knowing exactly what he was going to say when it came time to write it down. It wasn’t any one person’s fault, it was a mix of everything and nothing at all. That was Deadwood’s charm. He used to find it interesting, a mystery to solve, but now he just found it exhausting as he suffocated under its hand. 

While still deep in thought, the outside bathroom door flung open and Will heard footsteps entering noisily. 

“William!”  Shit.

“We know you are in here!”
“You’ve been avoiding us for the past week!”
“Will!?” 

William stood and sheepishly unlatched the stall, peeking his head out. 

“What do you guys want?” He looked at his three friends. The one in front was short and had reddish hair, his chubby face had more freckles than actual skin and he looked furious. Another was just as short as the one in front but was more lean with long blonde hair that covered the majority of his face at any moment, completely obscuring his eyes completely. The last had sandy brown hair and was almost as lanky as Will, he had thick black glasses that seemed to make his eyes bugglike and unevenly sized. 

Evan Spencers, Drew Johnson, and Mark Cooper (in order of introduction) were the three people William considered to be his “friends”. Together the four of them formed the Un-Witness Protection Club, a group of teens dedicated to solving mysteries and poking your nose where you weren't supposed to. They bonded over this last year and became fast friends over their shared love for discovering the unknown. That was back when Will still fought against the pull, now it felt like the unknown was a welcoming embrace waiting to take him. 

“Come on Will, you haven’t eaten lunch with us at all this past week.” Evan, the one with the red hair, shot at the sheepish-looking boy.
“Yeah we are your friends.” Mark agreed, nodding furiously while Evan nudged Drew who also mumbled affirmation from behind his long blonde hair. The four of them stood in silence in the bathroom. 

William was looking down at his feet, feeling especially awkward. He hadn’t wanted this to happen. He had hoped that the three of them wouldn't notice how he was avoiding them, trying to fade away without them noticing. They were so much better off without him, they were just too close to see that. But of course they noticed his behavior, they were a group of detectives unfortunately. They dedicated themselves to sticking their noses where they were not wanted and it was biting William in the ass this time. 

William opened his mouth, “I–” He was cut off by someone who entered the bathroom and gave a suspicious look at the four boys as he went into one of the stalls, latching it behind him. “Maybe we should talk in the hallway,” Will suggested, ducking past them out the door.  

Outside, the three boys looked expectantly at him. William was still looking down, picking at his hoodie sleeve, trying to think about what to say. He knew trying to lie to them wasn’t the best idea, they were fine-tuned to discovering the truth which meant he was at a double disadvantage since they knew him so well. 

“I didn’t want to tell you but I am leaving.” Off to an okay start…

“You are leaving Deadwood?!” Evan almost shrieked. “If this is Leo’s fault I swear I will take him down!”

“Shhh, I don't want the whole town to know.” Will grabbed the short boy’s arm and looked at the others. “I am leaving tonight. I didn’t want to worry all of you.” Not exactly a lie...  

“And even if I’m gone, I want the Un-Witness Protection Club to keep solving mysteries. It has nothing to do with Leo, but as far as I care Leo can go fuck himself.” 

Will smiled to reassure his friends. Mark was now crying, his tears fogging his thick glasses as he sniffed, not trying to hide his tears from the others. Will looked down again and continued. 

“Evan, I pass the leadership off to you.” He looked at the chubby boy who was furrowing his brows. “I know that you are going to uncover so many cool things, I'm sorry I won't be here to see it.” 

“We will miss you!” Mark hiccuped as Drew put an arm around the shorter boy. 

“I will lead us in your legacy!” Evan saluted William. “Thank you for getting us this far! We will never forget you!”
“Come back to visit us!” Mark sniffed from Drew’s chest.
“Sure will!” Will tried to smile again, his face feeling oddly stiff. The end of lunch bell rang and the boys separated. 

William breathed a sigh of relief– crisis: averted. At least they got a goodbye and Will knew that without him the group would continue to solve mysteries for years to come. They were better off without him, even if they cannot see it yet. 

—

Before he knew it, school was let out. Crazy how fast a day can go by while dissociating the whole time. William kept his head down as he walked out of the building as fast as he could and started making his way home down the narrow forest road to his house. Even in the mid afternoon it was already getting dark outside as the air clung to the fog, darkening shadows all around him. The woods gave off their usual threatening presence as they rose tall above the street, nearly blocking out the sky from view. 

As he walked William put his hands in his pockets and let his thoughts wander to his family. He hoped his parents were not home, he didn’t have the heart to say goodbye. He was a good for nothing son who never did anything right, he didn't have the right to be sad about leaving. They would be okay, he knew they would. They still had David to fulfill all the son duties that he had been avoiding for years. Mentioning his half-brother– he hadn’t talked to David since he called to wish him a happy birthday a while back. How long ago was that? William had no idea. Even if David called, he never really cared about him. How could he? William hated the man but he was glad his parents had a backup son. Especially one who wasn't a failure.

His step-mother probably won't be too sad, but he worried about his dad. His step-mother was very religious, taking him to church religiously (pun intended) every Sunday when he was younger. William used to sit on the hard pews and stare at the choir, wondering why they all nodded and smiled in sync. What was the appeal of the old man’s words? What was he missing? Maybe he was just that much worse for not understanding it. 

Needless to say Will stopped joining them a while back, after ignoring their attempts to wake him up every Sunday his parents eventually stopped trying, eventually just leaving him to attend the service week after week. He knew that his Step-mother thought less of him because of this but he didn't have the energy to care. He was already surrounded by enough self-loathing. 

Making it home, William walked around the back of the house and quietly slid the door open and slipped inside. The lights were off in the kitchen but the sound of a tv spoke in the other room. He could see the backs of his parents' heads, both watching some news report about Doorman, some up-and-coming superhero that the news showered in praise. The figure who was posing heroically on the screen apparently saved some kids from a burning orphanage. Good for him William thought bitterly to himself.  

He backed away and leapt noiselessly like a cat up the stairs to his room. He gently closed the door with both of his hands, making sure to minimize the click as it locked. 

Finally, he was alone at last and it was time for his plan. 

William started by getting the garbage bags that he hid under his bed and shoving the stacks of clothes and shoes into them. Unsurprisingly, most of them were black, it wasn't his fault it was just the best color for everything. He cleared off his desk in one sweep, dumping everything into a bag without caring for the crumpled papers and books that landed haphazardly into the bag with a crash. He tore the notes and posters scattered around his walls. Just doing anything to make it easier on his parents to get rid of all his stuff. He didn’t want to be a burden after death too, he was enough of a burden alive.  

After five garbage bags were filled and lined up against the wall, William straightened up and looked around. His room looked very clean and bare. He had removed all his personality from the decorations, only leaving a black duvet on his bed and a lamp on his desk. He felt very sad in a way, the room looked so ‘normal’ without him. It was like he was being erased already. 

William dug in his desk drawer and grabbed a paper and pencil. This was it, one last thing to do: write his note. 

He wrote everything. He addressed it to his parents, first telling them that he was sorry and where to find his body. He didn’t want some kids to find his decomposing corpse, so he asked them to send someone to move it. He thanked them for caring for him and explained that he just couldn't be around anymore. He explained that it wasn’t their fault that he was suffering and he was sorry for hiding it for so long. He said that he wanted all his stuff donated and to tell his friends. He apologized again and folded the note, laying the pencil carefully beside the paper. 

William stood up and pushed his chair back in. That was everything, he left his room leaving the door open and his light on behind him, not looking back.

Chapter Text

William walked through the dark woods, stumbling a bit on the rocks across the trail. It was a surreal experience. He thought that he would feel something– anything walking to his death, but there was a surprising calmness that surrounded him. For the first time in a long time it felt like he was living in the moment, finally able to hear the sounds around him, to feel the gentle breeze, and to see how the leaves were scattered on the ground. And so he walked in complete peace to his execution, his self-execution. 

Not paying attention, his foot got caught on a root, sending him face-down into the hard soil. He grunted as he rolled over onto his back, staring up at the dimming light through the trees. It struck him– this was his last day on Earth. He closed his eyes and imagined the Earth spinning under him and the sun rotating and felt so small. Life would go on after he was gone. Good.

He sat up quickly and looked around him. The woods were dimming in the evening light and noises were seeping from them, sending pangs of fright through William. He tucked his legs underneath him and breathed. Even though he was about to kill himself he didn’t want a wild monster to get the pleasure first. He just didn't want it to hurt. Odd– 

William felt so small, like a little kid who wanted to run to his parents, but he knew that he couldn't anymore. Not if they knew what he was about to do. Curled up on the forest floor, completely alone, he found himself praying to God. “I’m sorry. Please don’t let it hurt.” The innocent prayer of a lost child.

After a few minutes William stood up and walked the rest of the way. He stopped on a flat rock a minute or two later. There were no more trees above him and no grass below, just a flat rock that steeply dropped off just a few steps away. Wind blew in his hair and he breathed in the evening scene around him. His last moments on earth. What was he supposed to feel? He felt nothing.

William closed his eyes and took one bold step forwards 

One.

He thought about his friends. Goodbye , he whispered inwardly. Thank you for making Deadwood a less terrible place to be. 

Two.  

He took a second smaller step forwards. He thought about Deadwood, this godforsaken town that stole his will to live. If only he wasn’t born here maybe things would have turned out differently. Maybe he wouldnt be a useless piece of trash that was about to walk off a cliff right now. 

Three.  

He took one more shaky step forward. This time he felt the edge of the rock through the sole of his shoe. He was on the edge now. Will squeezed his eyes tighter and thought of his parents. He raised his head looking up at the dark sky. “I’m sorry”, he whispered into the silence as he raised his foot once more and–

Will fell down a lot slower than he thought he would. Time slowed as his foot made contact with the air and he crumbled under gravity. He twisted and pulled through the air into the darkness, barreling towards the forest below him. Shadows entered his vision before the wind stopped. Then he saw, heard, and felt nothing.

—-------

Stillness.

Darkness.

Coldness. 

Emptiness.

Blue.

Wait a minute–

What was that?

—--------

Blue light danced across his vision as William heavily opened his eyes. Light flooded away the blue specter and filled his eyes, assaulting his senses. What the hell?

He shakily shielded his eyes. Why was he here? He remembered the fall. Oh …

He…failed.

Will lifted his neck off the ground, his head pounding and muscles revolting. He mentally inspected his body. He didn’t necessarily feel like he was dying or bleeding out. He felt relatively normal. But that wasn’t possible, a jump from that height should have killed him. He should be dead. What the hell went wrong? Why didn’t it work? 

Will laid his head back on the dirt, physically and mentally exhausted and closed his eyes again. One question echoed in his mind. Why didn’t it work? Tears burned his eyes and slid down his face and into his ears but he did not try to wipe them away, he just let them fall. Too tired to care, too weary to do anything but think and cry. Sobbs shook his small supine form.

How did he fail at even killing himself? How was he such a failure?  

William slammed his head back on the ground, wincing at his already throbbing headache. 

Why can’t he just be done with this? With this pain? He didn’t deserve to live.  

Starting to cough, William sat up, wincing at his pounding head and wiped the tears with the back of his hand. He grabbed at the dirt and leaves on his clothes and messy hair and looked around. 

There were broken sticks around him that looked like they still had green leaves, standing out from the brown and rotting leaves he was sitting on. He must have broken branches off the trees on his way down. He had definitely fallen, but how did he survive a fall of over 80 feet without any injuries? He rolled up his hoodie and inspected his skin. Surviving from a fall of that hight without a single scratch was impossible. Right? Especially since he definitely hit the trees during his fall. 

As the detective part of William’s mind was spinning, the other part was exhausted. Even taking in his surroundings felt like he was walking through sludge. He wished for nothing more than his soft bed at the moment, to fall into unconsciousness and escape whatever was happening in the present. 

What he did notice was two things: 1) He was not dead. William’s head throbbed with a firey pain and though he didn't know much about being dead, William knew that dead people didn't feel pain. 2) It was daytime. That meant that he had been unconscious for at least a few hours. If he sat here too long people were going to start noticing that he was missing. Who knew how long he was lying here? It could have been days for all he knew and there wasn’t exactly a guide on “How Time Works When Coming Back to Life”. 

William stood up and started shakily walking through the dense brush that surrounded him. He had nothing more to go by than where the sun was in the sky which was entirely unhelpful since he didn’t know what time it was. 

After a while he came across a scuffed trail and began to wander down it until reached a road. The road was abandoned and mostly overgrown but luckily familiar. He finally had something to show for all of the years which he spent sneaking around the backroads of Deadwood. He knew exactly where he was and how to get home. Being a noisy son of a bitch was going to pay off for the first time in his life. He walked along the shoulder for a few miles until he finally spotted his house. He thanked whatever god could hear him, he was finally home. 

Feeling more dead than alive by the time he got to his house, William sluggishly opened the door and with as much stealth as he could muster, he slid into his bedroom and closed the door. It was just as tidy as he left it, the letter still nicely folded  and the garbage bags were still lined up against the wall. Thank goodness no one found out yet. Without another thought, William collapsed face first into his bed and fell fast asleep. 

Chapter Text

William woke up to a voice piercing through his sleep-thick ears. He groaned and buried himself further in his blankets. The voice unfortunately just got louder and came more into focus, pulling himself out of the comfortable slumber that his body ached for. 

“--am. William!” It was his mother’s voice. He opened his eyes, scowling at her.

“Get up, you are going to be late for school.” 

School? What was she talking about?

Then the memories flooded back. The woods. Waking up on the ground. Walking back. Falling asleep. He was supposed to be dead. He wasn't supposed to wake up again…

Shit . His eyes darted to the note he left on his desk yesterday, still untouched. It wasn’t time yet. If his mom saw it, it would ruin everything. He shot out of bed as gracefully as he could manage, grabbing the letter as he turned around. 

“I’m up.” He yawned and rubbed his eyes with the hand that was not hiding the paper behind his back.

“Good,” His mom smiled, not noticing his weird behavior. “What's up with your room?” She looked around and William shoved the paper underneath the sheets. 

“Uh nothing, just redecorating. I thought it was time for a change.” He lied. 

“Okay,” her eyes lingered on him as she finally left the room. “Don't be late.” She shouted back at him.

William breathed out in relief. He felt for his phone on his nightstand. It was April 18th at 7:21 am. Damn. It had already been a whole day since he jumped. He walked to the bathroom and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. 

To put it light: he looked awful. Despite being unconscious for the majority of yesterday, he looked like he hadn't slept in weeks. The bags under his eyes seemed to make his skin a shade of gray. His hair still had a few leaves that he hadn't bothered to take out yet and his lips were a pale shade of blue. He looked as dead as he felt. 

William splashed some water in his face and thought about what he was supposed to do next. He was supposed to be dead. He should have died. He wanted to die and a weird unexplainable fluke wasn't going to change his plan at all. Maybe a gun or pills would do the trick if falling didn't work. And if that didn't work he was sure a knife or rope would work just fine.

William looked at his reflection one last time before he walked through his house and out the front door. He didn't have anything but some cash in his pocket, leaving his phone and backpack inside. He didn't need anything else where he was going.

—-------------

Bells chimed as William pushed open the doors to his local corner store. He pulled up his hood and slunk away from the person at the front desk as he made his way through the isles to the bottles of sleeping pills. 

One of these should work. William thought to himself, staring at the rows upon rows of medicines. Who knew taking your own life was so complicated. William picked up a larger bottle of pills which looked like more than enough to do it and headed to the register. He placed a bottle of register with the bottle on the counter to check out. 

“Will this be it today?” The women at the counter looked very friendly, like someone his mother would be friends with. William nodded to answer her question.

“Did you find everything okay?” He nodded again, not having the energy to act friendly today. 

“That will be $23.50.” William reached into his pocket and pulled out the crumpled cash, handing it to the lady. She took it and noisily opened the register.

“Your change will be $2.50.” 

“Keep it.” William said quickly before thinking. He looked up and met her eyes for the first time.
“I want you to have it.” She just stared at him before William looked down and started to walk away.
“Take care, kid!” She called after him.

William pushed the chiming door and found himself outside. Kid . He had not been a kid in so long. Had he ever actually been one? He was always mature for his age, being called an ‘old soul’ by his parents and teachers for even longer than he even remembered. Could it be that he had grown up too fast to fully be a child? 

William looked around at the familiar Deadwood landscape feeling once again like an outsider in his hometown. Everyone his age was at school right now and he was about to die. He tightened his grip on the plastic bag and started walking towards the woods.  

—-------

William coughed as he came-to on the forest floor. His throat burned and tears ran down his face as he painfully gagged mid-cough. His arms were scarcely strong enough to hold him up as he gassed for air. William wiped the vomit and tears off his face with his sleeve. He felt like shit. Even more so than yesterday. Apparently pills were not the way to go, he was still unfortunately very much alive. His throat and eyes burning were enough evidence of that. 

William caught his breath and pushed himself to sit up. He remembered something, a faint memory that didn't feel real. After he swallowed the pills and the world started to spin and he laid down on the ground to accept his fate the blue light appeared again. It seemed to dance around him as he started to drift off and he remembered the light seeming to enter his chest as he lost consciousness. Wasn’t that the same light from before? Yes, he could almost remember seeing a similar blue light the first time he woke up. He had forgotten what made him remember. It was the same light as before, he was certain. 

Was that light just what you saw before you died? The light at the end of the tunnel? Maybe it was what was keeping him from dying. A spirit reviving him? Healing him? A curse?

William rubbed his burning eyes, forcing the detective part of his brain to be quiet for one goddamned second. He was too tired for this shit. It was the kind of tiredness that was in his very bones, that permeated all of his senses leaving him foggy and unable to think properly. 

Why cant he even die correctly? Being alive was just getting more and more complicated and he just wanted out. William bit his lip, he wasn't going to have a pity party now. He didnt deserve to. 

Out of the corner of his eye William saw another blue flash, he quickly turned his head but it was gone. It's official: he’s gone crazy. Imagining things that weren’t there was textbook insane material. William contemplated if this new-found craziness actually changed anything significant. Did it make him more or less of a danger to society since he was already completely suicidal? 

Before he could answer this very introspective question he saw another flash and turned his head even faster this time, hoping to catch a glimpse of it. But instead of running away, the light did not move and William found himself face to face with a blue flame floating a few feet away from him. It hovered over the ground illuminating the dark woods slightly. 

Holy shit, William thought to himself, Blinking hard. It looked as real as anything else around him but his mind was screaming that his eyes were making it up. He shakily stood without daring to even breathe, not sure if he should run towards or away from it. 

Without telling his arm what to do he instinctively reached out his hand towards it The blue orb floated towards him slowly, coming right up towards his outstretched hand. It was mere inches away and William was dazzled by its beauty. Its fire danced without being connected to anything, but instead swirled around itself. Its pristine blue was so out of this world that it looked like it would simply disintegrate if he even breathed. 

The orb drew closer to his hand, seeming to accept the invitation. Its light illuminated William’s outstretched hand but gave off no heat, in fact it seemed to get colder the closer it got. It floated nearer and as soon as it touched his finger, it vanished and William let go of his breath. He spun around and sure enough there it was again, further away and floating on the path slightly deeper in the forest. 

William was intrigued now. He couldn’t help but feel that this spirit? Light? Entity? Being? Was trying to tell him something. He walked closer, willingly being lead following wherever it was taking him. 

—--

The light led him deeper and deeper into the forest. Before William realized it, the sun was completely blocked out by the thick tree coverage above. He could have had been following this light for hours, William wasn’t sure any more. He stumbled on through the more and more uneven path until there was not a path at all, just thick brush and sticks that tore through his baggy jeans and stung his legs. William didn’t care, this light was leading him somewhere, showing him something, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it even if it killed him. But that was just wishful thinking. 

All he knew was that his whole “not being able to die" had something to do with this light. It had only appeared after he died for the first time and had appeared after the second time too. That is why after tramping through the forest till tired and bloody William finally stepped into a clearing. 

A cool breeze rustled the branches and seemed to blow out the flame, leaving him alone in the middle of the clearing, the light from the sky completely gone. William spun around looking for a trail a bit frantically, panic starting to rise in his throat. He had no idea where he was and had no idea how to get back. Furthermore he was far too tired and wore out to fight whatever animals may find him out here. 

A breeze froze William where he was, not trusting himself to even let out an icy breath. Without seeing anything William felt eyes on the back of his neck and he slowly willed himself to turn around. He turned around and saw them– pale figures that emited their own pale blue light, not unlike the wisp’s blue flame. There were two within visible distance, the others seemed to ignite the forest all around him, each figure flickering into view. Before long they completely surrounded the clearing as they drew closer to William. 

The figures were translucent and dressed very strangely, some in jeans and polos, others in what looked like nightgowns. They all walked very slowly as if in pain, all of them looking unbreaking at William. William forced himself to look back and what he found in their faces stopped him from running away; they were all so sad. It was as if this blue light that shone around them was the palpable sadness that they carried within them. William didnt know why but he wanted to help them. 

Before too long they stopped moving, only around six feet away. Some made it to the clearing but the vast majority stood far off in the forest, keeping their distance. All the figures stood early still, their arms at their sides. 

“Hello?” William timidly asked while observing the figures more closely. One in front was missing half his face, his jaw bone clearly exposed and hanging open. Behind him a woman had a large blood stain on her nightgown from her stomach. Others nearby looked mauled and torn apart by animals. He felt sorry for all these people despite how terrifying they looked. 

Hello Wisp

The sound seemed to whisper at him from all around him, it was so quiet that it seemed to come from inside his own head.

“Hello...” William weighed his options. If he was stuck in a creepy forest with scary ghosts he might as well be friendly to said ghosts. “How do you know my name?”

You are the Whisperer

He shook off the chills that crawled up his spine and responded. “What does that mean? Who are y’all”

We are the living, just as you are

“You look pretty dead to me, are you connected to the blue flame that lead me here?”

Life does not end at death, Whisperer

“What does that mean, the ‘whisperer’?”

You are more like us than you know

The sound got closer and more breathy as a breeze blew through the forest and the light started to fade. 

“What?” The figures started to disappear one by one. 

“Wait! Come back! I still have questions!” William stepped forwards but the figures were gone in a blink. All of them simply vanished into the air. William found himself completely alone in the dark once more.

Chapter Text

William woke up with the light sending daggers through his skull from his lamp. He groaned and turned away, reaching for his phone. He had an endless scroll of missed messages. The Un-witness protection club asking how the move was going, grandparents who had heard from his parents that he was not ‘feeling well’, and even texts from his parents asking if they could get him anything; people who all meant well but he just didn't have the energy to respond at the moment. He dropped his phone onto his duet and sat up with much effort. 

He looked around at his disorderly room, it was a far cry from the sterilized state he let it in a week ago; clothes, bottles, books, and other junk was strewn all over the floor. It was a disaster, just another thing that he didn't have the energy for. Just another thing to remind William that he was a failure. He put his pounding head in his hands wishing for death for the millionth time. 

He had been telling his parents for the past week that he didn't feel well and couldn’t go to school, but that excuse was starting to lose its lifespan unless he went to an actual doctor. It had only worked this long because frankly William looked awful. He had not eaten or drinken much of anything (much to his parent’s concern), his eye bags under his eyes had darkened considerably looking more like bruises than ever, and even his skin took on a kind of greenish hue since he had not seen the sun in a considerable amount of time. 

William tried to be worried— he really did, especially when he had almost forgotten what his parent’s faces looked like without them being about to cry— but he just didn't have enough energy to care. He had at first attempted to kill himself in any way that was accessible to him. Drowning, cutting, hanging, falling (again), and even drinking bleach but he had come away unscathed from all of them. Maybe not completely ‘unscathed’ but definitely still alive. 

Everytime William woke up he felt more and more drained from energy, even getting out of bed these days was a near impossible feat. Most nights he couldn’t go to sleep, but rather stared up at the ceiling, too tired to close his eyes and too distracted by the ghosts to think about anything else. 

Oh right— the ghosts. Ever since following the wisp into the forest and talking to the figures, more and more ghosts had started appearing and following him. At first it was not too invasive, they would faintly be standing in a corner of the room and flicker in and around the room slowly, but it seemed the more times that William ‘died’ the more real and alive they seemed. 

Ghosts were now an accepted part of William’s life at this point. He had become acquainted with their mutilated forms and silent cries, sometimes even mentally naming the ones that appeared over and over. Often a strangled child, ‘Anna’ he called her, would come, noiselessly shrieking, to the side of his bed as he stared unblinking at her small, very bruised figure. She couldn't have been much older than 6. Older figures often crowded into his room, not moving but kept their icy glare constantly fixed on William no matter what he was doing. One fantom, ‘Bertha’, was a shriveled up grandmother whose eyes never failed to send shivers down Williams spine as she tracked him with her unblinking eyes across the room from all hours of the day. 

William’s only relief from these constant nightmares was that the figures were silent. No matter how terrifying William could make them disappear by just closing his eyes. Sometimes reliving his own horrific memories of dying over and over was preferable to seeing a weeping mother with her stomach cut open leaning over his bed, fantom blood invisibly soaking his bedsheets.

William layed back down on the bed, wishing again that he could just stop existing when he heard a loud unnatural sound. It sounded like metal being crushed by a bulldozer. He sat up again, leaning to look out his window. What he saw looked photoshopped before his eyes: a large monkey-bull looking monster was perched on top of a folded light post. The moonlight illuminated its large tusks and claws under its fur that looked caked with mud or blood. It looked nearly as large as the car in the driveway below it. 

He stared with wide eyes and slowly pushed himself away from the window. 

“Mom,” He called out, eyes still fixed on the scene before him. “DAD!” the creature leaped down into the lawn outside his house and he took off running out of his room. His head swam from the sudden movement and grabbed his door frame as he turned speedily around the corner. 

“MOM!” He called again and he forcefully swung open their door and flicked on the light. His two parents sat up, looking at him through confused eyes.

“There is-” He started before realizing how out of breath he was. He blinked the black spots from his vision “-outside. On the front lawn.” His dad was already out of bed and pushed William aside and walked towards the front windows. His mom only looked at him confused. William looked back and they sat there in the dark doorway in complete silence as he tried to stop shaking. He heard his father curse loudly from the other room and his mom also rushed past him and he put a hand against the wall. 

Monsters were not uncommon in Deadwood but usually nothing that could bend metal came crawling out of the woods. William turned and walked slowly to where his parents stood gawking at what they saw. The beast was walking in circles, tearing up the turf below him. As William approached the window, stepping in front of his frozen parents the beast stopped and looked right at him, its piercing yellow eyes trapping his dark brown ones. It approached the window very carefully and his mother gasped and grabbed his arm. 

“William, what is that thing?” She shrieked-whispered in terror. He just shook his head. He did not know why this was happening, all he knew was that the ghosts were also scared of it, none of them were anywhere to be seen. The way the beast looked at him told him all he needed to know. This creature was here for him. 

Before he could speak the creature jumped at the window, fracturing the glass but not quite shattering it. His mother screamed. His father yelled, grabbing his mother and pulling her behind him. Instead of lunging again, the creature recoiled and backed away. William grabbed a chair nearby for support, his heart was racing like crazy and his fist turning white with tension of trying to ground himself. The creature growled once more and then finally crept away, strutting down the street slowly. 

“What. Was. That.” He looked at his mother who had a hand to her chest and tears filling her eyes. William forced himself to breathe in, willing his legs to stop shaking so violently. He meekly opened his mouth and looked down.

“I think I have something to tell you.” 

Chapter Text

As William sat on the dining room floor of his childhood home, he wondered to himself how circumstances in life had led to this point. All of the decisions he had made had led him exactly to this moment. He thought about Back to the Future and how Marty McFly was able to change the course of his life with one flick of his finger and William wished he could have that power. To flick his finger and change whatever in hell was happening before him. 

He had told his parents everything. Not exactly everything , but the important parts. He told them he ‘accidently’ fell off a cliff a week ago and now was seeing ghosts. That the ghosts are everywhere and he didn’t know how to be normal anymore. Which was all perfectly true, except the accidental part.  

He looked up at his parents who were a few feet from him. He was surprised to find that they were also on the ground. Sound wasn’t quite getting to his ears and it felt dreamlike. His mother was crying on her knees, his father wrapped around his wife in a protective stance and was shouting at William. Why was she crying? William couldn’t hear what was being said, he just blinked and looked forwards. It sounded like he was underwater. Maybe nothing was real. Maybe this was all a dream. Yeah. A dream like that one time he was in the forest. Was that a dream? He wasn’t sure anymore but all he wanted was to go back to sleep. 

“--AM.” The voices were coming back through the confusion. “WILLIAM!” The sound of his name pierced through his head and it took effort not to cover his ears. William gripped the bottom of his hoodie and looked back to the ground. He could hear his mother sniffing and shame crawled over his chest. 

Why was he such a failure?

The question echoed like a familiar friend, hurting the same as the first time he asked it. He unconsciously grabbed a handful of his messy hair and pulled hard, his fingers deeply tangled trying to feel anything other than this. 

“William.” It was his father again. “Look at me.” William looked up, meeting his dad’s harsh eyes. Except his eyes were not harsh, they were sad. His dad reached for him, pushing his arm down from where he was pulling his hair. 

“We are going to figure this out.” Oh. That wasn’t what he expected. That wasn't what he was supposed to say. What if it couldn't be fixed? What if he was too broken?

“Okay.” Was all he said but he hoped this was true. 

—----

The next few days were weird. William didn’t necessarily regret telling his parents but it definitely complicated things. First of all, they acted like he was made of glass, putting on fake smiles and constantly whispering just out of earshot. William wished it would all stop. He almost stopped leaving his room all together, just rotting away in his coffin of a room. 

William laid on his back, eyes closed and his headphones blasting music so loudly that it probably was rotting his brain. He was so tired of existing, he wished that the heavy drums and bass would disintegrate him into dust and carry him far away. To scatter him so far and wide that he would cease to exist at all. 

As if in a dream, William opened his eyes and took his earphones off. He sat up and rolled off his bed. Without hesitation he stepped through his messy room and wandered into the kitchen. He approached the kitchen counter and his hand reached for a knife, not too big but definitely sharp. He held it firmly, getting used to it in his hand. It felt right.

Shadows and ghosts passed him as he went to the bathroom. He shut the door behind him and locked out the nightmares, setting the knife down on the rim of the bath and he slowly reached for the tap and started the water. As William pulled his clothes off he caught a whiff himself, he smelled like something dead. He didn't know when his last bath was, probably weeks. William folded his clothes neatly on the sink and stepped into the tub carefully. 

The pleasantly hot water enveloped his cold body as he sunk deeper, holding onto the rim of the tub. He dunked his head underwater, hearing the complete silence of underwater, feeling his hair move gently in the waves. 

He sat up and pushed his dripping hair out of his eyes as he reached for the knife. He turned it in his hand before he pressed the cold knife to his skin and closed his eyes. 

“Please.” He whispered and pulled. Over and over. 

William lowered his burning arms into the water and felt the water lessen the sting. The water was turning murky as his mind also started to go fuzzy. William sunk lower once more and felt the knife drop from his hand– lower, and lower in the water. He was so tired. He tried to lift his arm but his body no longer obeyed him. He closed his eyes slowly as though pulled down by another force. The water was quickly darkening with his blood and he was finally in complete darkness.

—---

A blue light pierced through William’s mind and his eyelids were forced open slightly. Through eyelashes, William saw the familiar forms of the wisps again. This time there were three separate flames that were hovering very close just over the tub. 

William watched as one of them slowly lowered till it was touching the water, dipping below and causing the water to glow a bright fluorescent blue. It was such a bright blue that William thought he must have died until cuts on William’s arms glowed an even brighter blue and his limbs started to tingle as his skin stretched and pulled.

Now with eyes fully opened William watched as the blood was absorbed from the water and brought back into his pale body. The lights faded and the water was completely clear once more and the wisps were gone. 

Finally fully awake, William gasped for air and pulled himself up out of the water, sitting up in water. He felt his fingers tingle as his body flooded again with an excess of blood. He clawed at his skin all over, nails tearing at his freshly healed wounds. His very core buzzed with energy and eventually let his hands fall back into the water as he leaned over and breathed heavily, water dripping from his hair into the water.

Despite his body being jump started into life, William’s mind was still frozen. He wasn't sure what happened nor if he could trust what he saw. He held out his arm and looked at it. Not a mark to be seen. It was almost as if he never took the knife– that he never saw the inside of his— no. 

After a few minutes of breathing William lifted his head and looked around him, it was still dark outside. He was shivering and realized that the water he was sitting in was ice cold. He got out and quickly dried himself. He put on the clothes folded on the counter and looked at the tub of clear water before he flicked off the light and turned towards his room. 

Chapter Text

William woke up with his cheek smashed against his pillow and sun hitting his face. Funny, he felt like he had not seen the sun in so long. William sat up and heard mundane sub urban sounds he was used to in Deadwood. His parents in the kitchen, the tapping of his fan going around, a dog barking, birds calling. 

He let out a breath he was holding for who knows how long and reached for his laptop. The ghosts (or spirits??) he seemed burned into his mind from last night. He wasn’t thinking straight then but he knew that what he saw was real. 

He opened the cold metal keyboard and opened google. William ruffled his semi damp hair absentmindedly and sat staring at the cursor. What on earth was he supposed to type? “I just died and blue spirits resurrected me?” No, google was not a self help site. He quickly typed “Blue spirits” into the search bar and started to scroll down. He found alcohol brands, music albums, and even instagrams of both of those things. 

William tried again and typed “Blue spirits legend.” He scrolled down the mildly more promising results, at least now he was in the realm of the supernatural. He clicked on a forum post talking about ghostly orbs. It read:

“Spirits, which are the energy of a past life force, emit their own energy in the spaces they occupy. To the human eye this can come off as light. Some people report seeing a flame of some sort, which could be from the strong connotation fire has with spirituality. Fire can be both pure and destructive and is related in many culture’s folklores to the presence of God. Fire is also used in some cultures to be a way to connect to the spirit world, and in occurrence, for the spirit world to connect with us.”

William paused. He had been to enough Sunday morning classes at church to remember the stories of the Bible. The burning bush, when Moses talked to God for the first time, the sacrifices of the Old Testament to purify the Israelites sin, and the pentecost, when fire appeared above the disciples head and the Holy Spirit came. 

But these fires were different from those he remembered. He skimmed over the rest of the blog which just talked about how ghosts appear in dreams and the symbols which they take on. Since William was not trying to connect with a recently deceased grandparent, he left the page and typed in “Blue Spirit Fire.” He found a hokey page called Spirit.Minded whose real estate was mostly obscured with pop up ads, but he read through the gaps.

“ Blue Flames are symbols in many legends. Often associated with the mystical, blue flames serve as a bridge between the physical and spiritual realms. These flames are very powerful and just as fire is an agent of chaos, blue flames are particularly unpredictable. Interestingly, the color blue represents wisdom, divine communication, and stability; Blue flames are seen as protectors of the spiritually attuned.” 

William scrolled and found more Biblical explanations and a picture of a burning bush. Maybe years in the church were good for something afterall. Underneath he read: 

“Some Native American mythos tell us of the transformational and ancestral properties of the blue flame . Some tribes would invoke ceremonies for healing and communication with the dead. Ancestral spirits were known to turn the tribal fires blue to connect to the physical realm. ” 

WIlliam skimmed the rest of the article, reading about how to create a spiritual presence for the flames to appear. He also read about how the blue flame is what is theorized to resurrect the phoenix in some myths. Once he got to the last paragraph which reminded him to “remain open-minded” , he closed his laptop. That was enough spiritual enlightenment for one day. 

He got up and made his way to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. His body still felt sluggish but for the first time in months, he felt the familiar thrill of the chase. Investigating had always been what made him feel alive. Now that there was a mystery, William was going to find the answers.The rusty cogs began to move again and spin out of control. His mind was filled with replaying what he'd seen and read. 

What if the flames were what brought the ghosts? What if it is what attracted them to him? William grabbed a cup from the counter and then started the coffee machine. His mother walked in and he nodded to her. 

But if that is true then how can he suddenly see them? The coffee began to pour into the cup, sputtering and gasping. Why did they lead him to that forest? William grabbed the coffee cup firmly. Why were they so hell bent on keeping him alive? Why would they want him not to die?

He turned aggressively with the cup in his hand and met his mothers eyes. Well not her eyes, but her expression stopped him in his tracks. Her eyes were full of fear and seemed to almost look past– almost through– him. Her mouth was open slightly and she was frozen still.

“Mom?” She shrieked and dropped the plate in her hand. 

“OH MY GOD.” She ran from the room. William looked down at himself and just saw the ground. His arm was just not there, neither were his legs for that matter. 

“Janet?” His father yelled from the other room.” William set down the cup and took off through the back door and into the dark woods. He heard his parents commotion behind him but he was already gone. He did not close the door behind him. 

Chapter Text

William ran harder than he ever ran in his life. If only coach Silas could see him now. He ran so hard that the trees and roots seemed to pass right through him. The crunch of leaves and kicked rocks was far behind him. He ran until his feet stopped and he almost lurched forwards. 

It was so quiet. Nothing but the sound of rain filled the forest. William looked down and his feet were on the edge again. The same cliff, same time of day. The spot William chose to kill himself. It must have only been like 2 weeks since that happened. Funny, everything was the same but he was no longer the boy who stepped off this cliff. The scene was reset but the actor was missing.

William looked up at the cracks in the trees to the sky. He didn’t notice the rain on the way, but the raindrops now hit his face, pressing his hair down onto his face. He ran so hard that he should be out of breath, but instead his chest was cold and empty. The same question echoed in his head again– this time so fervently that he almost heard it outloud. 

Why am I here?

You are the Whisperer. William was on his knees. He remembered his time in the woods, following the Blue flames. 

What does that even mean? Did the blue flame mean that a spirit was trying to contact him? The article said that blue light was a source of communication and healing. Was the spirit trying to heal him? What for?

In the dim forest light, the leaves around him all glowed slightly blue. William grabbed at the arms of his damp hoodie tightly, his fingers digging into his own boney arms beneath. 

“Why is this happening to me?” He spoke out loud this time, eyes tightly closed, repeating the words over and over. “Why can’t I die? Why won’t you let me die?” His voice was almost inaudible. 

William curled in on himself. The rain soaked his knees from the leafy floor and ran down his face in streams. Tears got lost in the rain, further carving out the emptiness in his chest. 

William started to shake as he looked out to the misty air and silent trees under the cliff.

“Help me.” He begged. “Help. m-me– please.” He put his face in his frayed hoodie sleeves and wept. The sounds of his cries were muffled as the rain picked up and rattled the leaves around him.  

—-

It was long after dark that William slid the backdoor carefully behind him as he entered his kitchen again. He turned around and was met by his mother attacking him with a hug. William did not react, shocked. 

“Oh thank Jesus, you are okay.” She smoothed his soaked hair. “Thank goodness you are okay.” William's Father stood further away just watching the exchange. 

“I’m so sorry Will,” his mother pulled away, “I did not mean to react like that I was just so startled and– Honey you are freezing, let me get you a blanket.” She let go of his hand and William and his father stood not looking at each other. She came back in, wrapping a thick towel around William’s shoulders. It didn’t stop the shaking, but it was nice. 

“Here, have a seat.” She ushered him to a chair nearby as the expression on William’s face grew more perplexed. 

All three of them sat down. His mother looks at his dad and his dad clears his throat. 

“Me and your mother are really worried about you–” His Mother leaned forward and touched WIlliam’s arm.

“And we love and support you sweetie but we are so scared and we just want to support you the best way we know how.” His dad looks sharply at his mom and she leans back in her chair, gripping her mug tighter. 

“So… Me and your mother thought it would be best to look elsewhere to get you help.” 

Great , William inwardly rolled his eyes. Therapy or counseling should fix everything. He thought to himself.

“So we found some people that looked capable of helping.  They are called Watch.” William’s head shot up and a more baffled expression darkened his face.
“Watch? Like the superhero place?”
“Yes.” His father said calmly. “They are an organization based in Freedom city that knows a whole lot more about… all of this than we do.”
“I’m not a superhero, I just see ghosts.” William mumbled.

“And you seem to be a magnet to a lot of other scary things too.” His dad’s voice was now threatening.

“I’m not like freaking Doorman! All I am is a freaky teenage kid who talks to ghosts and CANT DIE. I guess I can turn… invisible or whatever the heck but that doesn’t make me a hero !”

“Don’t raise your voice at me son!” His eyes were dangerous so William clenched his jaw and apologized. 

“Sorry sir,” William focused down at his hoodie sleeve he was picking at. 

“Look,” his dad placed his hand on the table towards his son. “Me and your mother see how much you are struggling.” His voice was sympathetic. ”Nothing is going to miraculously get better. We have to try something . Who knows? Maybe this Watch place will help.”

“They said that unexplained things happening at your age were very common in young superheroes. They said they would be very interested in meeting you.” His mom chirped in, her face displaying a faux-hopeful smile.

“But, I can't– save people.” William bit his lip to stop the burning in his eyes. There was a heavy silence between all three of them.

“We are going into the city on Saturday– just to have a meeting.” His dad added defensively. “If they can’t answer our questions then we will try something else.” William felt a hand on his shoulder. “We are going to figure this out, Will.”

William nodded and it was settled. He would be going to Freedom City on Saturday with his parents. 

—-

In the car, William had his walkman headphones on blaring music so loud to drown out the Christian radio playing upfront. The drive was only around 4 hours but the dread of reaching where you're headed has a way of making the miles stretch. William wished he was already there, never left at all, or better yet–  that he would/could just die. 

William pulled his legs to him and watched the gloomy landscape of Deadwood rise into the busy scenes of Freedom City. He didn’t know what he was supposed to feel, but it probably wasn’t this. Shouldn't he be happy to leave the only home he knew? He wanted to leave so long, why did it not feel good?

The rock music drowned out his senses, nearly vibrating his skull, but he still heard:

It's because you are still you.

William pressed the volume up button and closed his eyes as he leaned his head on the headrest, heading to the heart of Freedom City. 

Chapter Text

The car eventually slowed down as they approached a long but towering building. It was curved, the entrance being in the front of the C shape as it rose up and out, plated with windows like scales, reflecting like the sun itself. William stepped out of the car and his neck was strained looking up at how high the blinding windows reached. Eventually his mom pulled his arm, leading him on the paved path through well-manicured bushes towards the large double doors that had handles of the letter W. 

They swung the giant door open with a surprising lack of difficulty door and found an immense lobby. All three of them stepped inside and stopped to take in the room. Posters of Mrs. G and Harlem Shade were rolled down from the loft, nearly touching the ground. Wordsmith and Lightspeed's posters were to the left, just as massive as the other two’s. 

Also to the left, just under these posters, was the giftshop, closed off by a glass wall. William wandered over towards the glass and looked in. Inside there was more Watch merch than he had ever seen. Action figures, sweatpants, hoodies, cups, hats, books, and lanyards were displayed on tables and stands everywhere. Tshirts were displayed up to the ceiling on one of the walls. Even lesser heroes were represented, as well as well known characters in cartoons that William watched growing up. It looked like an explosion of purple, blue, and yellow. 

Back near the front, the lady at the desk with long black hair welcomed his parents who looked like lost preschoolers. William walked back to join them. 

“Hello, are you here for the Heroes of Realm Exhibit?” She said over to their direction. William’s Mother stepped forwards and folded her hands warmly. 

“We are here to talk with Mrs. Gilbert?” The receptionist slightly narrowed her eyes at the three of them. His mom added, “we talked to her on the phone.” Which made her look more suspicious

“Let me check to see if she has any appointments today," she said as she hit behind the computer.”

“That won’t be necessary Deb.” The smiling figure of Mrs G stepped into the lobby. Her face was lit up behind her buggy glasses as she approached them. She was wearing a neat purple top and a black pencil skirt reaching her knees with modest black heels. Deb’s eyes grew wide as she ducked behind the monitor in front of her. 

Mrs. G approached them confidently as held out her hand.

“You must be Mr. and Mrs. Wisp,” She shook both of their hands before she turned her shining bright blue eyes to Williams, “And you must be William.” She put two hands around his hand which he did not offer, but was being shaken vigorously.

“It's so lovely to meet all of you!” She dropped William's hand and he quickly pulled down his hoodie sleeve. Mrs. G started waking and talking, seemingly to herself, as the three Wisps scrambled to follow. “As you know, WATCH has been under a lot of new exciting changes! This is our new giftshop– Oh! And this is the new exhibit, Heroes of Realm! If you have time later I would highly recommend a poke around there. There are just so many fun things to learn about!” 

She walked towards a large wooden door and pushed the handle open, swinging the door open and gesturing the Wisps inside. It was not a very large room, most of the wall was taken up by the large door.

“Feel free to have a seat anywhere you like.” Mrs. G closed the door behind them and they felt the room seal with its noise canceling effect. There was a table with futuristic red chairs pulled around it and they all sat down, making themselves comfortable in this very new situation.

“So,” She folded her hands, “Tell me about what brings you here today,” It was not a question. Mr. Wisp spoke up first.

“William here, our son, has been exhibiting some… odd behaviors. It first started when these huge creatures started appearing around and he told us he also saw ghosts and other things that weren’t really there.” 

Mrs. G’s expression did not change, pleasantly listening to the information. 

“And the other day he turned into a ghost himself, really scared the bejeezus out of me.” Mrs. Wisp Chuckled at her own joke.

“These ‘huge creatures’, you were able to see them?” Both parents nodded. “Can you describe them?” Mr. Wisp cleared his throat. 

“I mean it was massive, larger than both of our cars. And it looked like a huge ape, but had tusks and these yellow glowing eyes.” Mr. Wisp shivered. 

“It was horrible.” His wife took her husband's hand, 

“That does sound pretty scary.” Mrs. G nodded encouragingly, looking at William. William had yet to look up at the redhaired women. 

“Right,” Mrs. G matterafactly folded her hands and leaned forwards. “I think that is all I have for you all, would you mind if just the two of us talk for a bit? Just me and William?”

William looked up at the mention of his name. His two parents stood up and thanked Mrs. G, reassuring him that they would be right outside. They filed out and then it was just the two of them in the room

“As you can probably understand I wanted to get to know you, WIlliam.” William was looking down at his hoodie sleeves. 

“Not one for talking it seems.” Mrs. G smiled to herself. 

“I know your parents told me a little bit about what your powers were, would you mind telling me when they started? How they work? Your process of learning how to control your powers?” She looked at him with her big blue eyes, hands folded in her lap expectantly.

“I– uh. I fell off a cliff." William paused and furrowed his brows. “And I should have died– but I, I didn’t.” Mrs. G still did not pipe up so William kept stumbling through his explanation. “and , uh I started seeing dead people? Like, uh, ghosts and these blue flames which talked to me once. And I uh guess I can also turn invisible?” William closed his mouth, suddenly realizing he wasn't making any sense.

“And these ghosts, can anyone else see them?”
“No. Only me. It's also like they can see me, ya know?” Mrs. G nodded vigorously, happy he was talking a bit more freely.

“And you said that you can turn.. Invisible was it?”
“Yeah, that only happened that once though.” William paused before he added, "It's not like I can control it or anything.”

“Younger superheroes often find it difficult to control their powers when they are so new.”
“I’m not a superhero.” William interjected, perhaps a bit defensive. 

“It’s not powers that make a hero, its the p–”
“--’Person behind the powers’, yeah I get it.” William rolled his eyes which felt a bit heavy. “I just– If you are looking for a ‘hero’ then I think you are looking in the wrong place.” Mrs. G leaned back, tilting her head. 

“Why would you say that, William?”
“I–”, He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to respond. There wasn’t much point in lying, Truth was even stranger than reality nowadays. Any lie he made up on the spot would not be good enough to get out of this one. Maybe if Mrs. G really understood, if he told her everything, she would also see that he’s not worth helping. That he was not ‘hero-material’. 

“I didn’t fall that night in the woods,” William felt cold as his skin burned with the confession, “I wanted to die, but I didn’t.” Mrs. G did not speak and William did not look up. “I have tried so many times to die, but I can’t. I keep waking up and seeing more ghosts and more freaking blue flames, but I don't know what any of it means and I’m– I’m so tired.” William’s eyes burned, but he lifted his face and locked his blue, sad eyes with the women in front of him. “How am I supposed to be a hero when I can’t even save myself?” There was a heaviness over the air that seemed to fall over them. 

“William, I understand that you feel hopeless and out of control. You have been through so much more than anyone your age should have to go through.” Her face almost looked sincere. “Us heroes don’t have everything figured out. Heck, I forget to bring my lunchbox to work at least once a week.” Her eyes shined as she laughed. “What makes a hero is a determination to not let others suffer in the ways in which we have, to be an example to those who feel helpless.”

“I just want to figure out what is wrong with me.” William mumbled into his collar. “I just want to be normal.” Mrs G leaned towards him.

“My dear, I’ve never met anyone ‘normal’. Everyone has their own quirks and past and their own music taste,” she gestured to the headphones around his neck, “and we are all just huge messes who are doing the best with what we are given. We are all learning how to be our best selves.” She paused. “I think you have a gift, William. I think you are searching for answers, and we may be able to help you find them. If you would trust us just a little bit, you might even be able to help others with this gift too. Your life does not have to be over yet.” 

William looked up to meet the most sincere eyes that he’s ever seen. Without even thinking it through, he nodded and after seeing the light fill Mrs. G’s face, he couldn't help smiling for the first time in a long time. 

Chapter Text

William stood still feeling very big and very small at the same time. To everyone else, today was a normal day. Not for William— today was the day that he was leaving Deadwood and moving to Freedom City. 

Willam’s parents were probably more excited than he was. His mom fussed over him having enough clothes, not listening to William’s hundredth: "I'm fine, mom.” She shook her head at the pile of black, oversized hoodies that littered the bed. Needless to say, William was dragged on a day-long shopping trip, his mother fussing over him needing more "professional looking” clothes. William knew for certain that the light green polo and new pair of khakis would never be touched, but he packed them anyway, hoping to appease his mother. 

His mom had also packed a bag of snacks that probably had 20 more granola bars than he could reasonably consume in a year, as well as beef jerky and enough canned ravioli to weigh 20 lbs. William blushed at how many bags he was taking to move in, if it was up to him he would just have a backpack of necessities. He didn’t see why he needed to be prepared for every situation that could need a new pair of shoes. 

But alas, his mother (as always) had her way. Packed in the backseat of the mini-van was two suitcases, a fabric grocery bag of snacks that William was unable to push, let alone lift, a plastic tote full of cleaning supplies and air freshoners, and a brand new sheet and comforter set wrapped in a grocery bag. Who knew someone could even own so many things?

William inwardly cringed at how many things he had with him. The urge to open the car door and simply run away kept bubbling up in William’s stomach, but every time he looked up, his dad gave him a reassuring smile in the rearview mirror and William stayed securely fastened in his seat. Guess this is what honoring your father and mother or whatever the bitch it was. This is what they wanted for him, despite them not knowing half of what was going on. If this could make William even slightly less of a burden, it was worth the embarrassment. 

“We are here!” If William was not nervous before, he was now. His heart dropped below his stomach as he put his hoodie sleeves over his eyes. After manually taking a deep breath, letting his head stop spinning, he unbuckled and pressed the handle of the mini van door. The door slowly rolled open, revealing the shimmering towering WATCH building that was his new home. This time, a dark man with dreadlocks was waiting for them outside. He looked very tall and stood pin-straight, accentuating how built he was. 

He waved at them and approached the parked car, reaching out to shake Mr. Wisp’s hand. 

“Hello, I am Tide! You must be the Wisps. I will be the caretaker of William during his stay here.” 

“It's lovely to meet you!” Mrs. Wisp also took his hand, smiling warmly. “Will, come meet this kind young man, he will be watching over you during your stay here!”

William gave a slight wave. 

“William! It's great to finally meet you! The other two boys will be so excited. Dakota arrived just a few hours ago and Vincent, yesterday!” Tide smiled reassuringly before turning to the adults. “If you all need any help with bags, I will go ahead and show you where he will be staying. 

Tide lifted the large suitcase and snack tote easily on each shoulder and showed them to the elevator. William grabbed the small rolling bag and followed in Tide’s shadow, curling in on himself. Shit. He forgot there would be other teenagers. Historically, first-impressions were not William’s strong suit and thinking about meeting other teenagers had William sweating.

After they got inside, they went down a few floors before the doors opened into an avenger's-like lobby. There was a circular couch wrapped around a huge TV. The kitchen island was on the other side with hanging lights and purple stools to sit on. The kitchen looked very high tech, even the fridge glowed with a faint light below it. 

On the other walls were doors that led to each of the kid’s rooms. One said “DC” and the other said “Vincent”, both in very sloppy handwriting. William stood in awe of how nice everything was. Who knew superheroes made a fortune? Actually, that made a lot of sense since they were essentially famous celebrities. 

Before any warning was given, a small figure came running at William from behind, knocking him over, also completely kicking the rolling bag he held on to, sending it sliding feet away. 

William found himself on the ground, grappled by the arms of a small, very red-haired boy. As he stared in shock, the boy shook his hair out of his eyes and smiled so big that William could see his gums. His eyes were wild and William felt fear.

“Hi! I’m Dactoa! We are going to be great friends.”

“Dactoa.” Tide spoke sternly, “Let William go. Give him some time to adjust before you tackle him.” William was freed and Dacota ran out of the room so quickly that he thought it might have just been a vision. After less than a second, the boy, Dacota, ran back in with another boy, much taller and lanky, in both of hands. This one looked about their same age, much more shy, and had long pointy ears that stuck out through his long purple hair.

“And this is Vyncent. He is very cool and has knives!” There was still that crazed look in the small man’s eyes. “He is not from this universe! Do you also like pizza? Vincent likes to eat rats, but I made him try pizza earlier and he said he liked it a lot. It is my favorite food. Man, I am hungry.” William made eye contact with the purple-haired boy, blue eyes locking with silver. William looked away, breaking the moment.

“Dactoa, can you and Vincent let William get unpacked first? Perhaps you can go spar?” Tide’s voice was very firm and Dacota instantly dropped Vincent and took off, yelling:

“Race you, Vyncent!”

Tide looked back at the stunned Wisps and sighed. “Never a dull moment with that one.” He looked like a tired mother of three before he slapped on a fake smile and a cheery tone. “Now, where were we?”

William’s room was even bigger than his one at home. It was also much more white. His mother bossed around William’s dad and put the room quickly into order. She fluffed out the bedsheet with an air of self-importance as William slowly stacked the piles of shirts into the empty dresser. In less than an hour, the bags were unpacked, bed was made, decorations (to William’s embarrassment) were put up, and they were done.

After his mom deemed the room to be “good enough” it was time for goodbyes. He would not see them again for at least 4 months. It dawned on William he had never been away from his parents for so long before. His mother rubbed at her eyes dramatically as his dad awkwardly side-hugged him. William felt nothing. He supposed he should probably be sad. He probably should feel something, but he did not. Maybe that was for another time. Maybe he would never feel it. 

His parents waved one more time as they got into the car and drove away. William stood motionless in the driveway, watching them silently as Tide stood awkwardly behind him. Once the car was out of sight, Tide placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“How about we get some dinner, champ? Do you like beef stroganoff?”