Chapter Text

PRELUDE 

“And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character.”

Ruth 3:11

Loyalty. It’s the virtue that allowed me entrance to heaven, and the virtue I shunned in favor of a life in hell. I should regret my choices, but I don’t. How can I when demons such as the small sheep hunched over across from me can be helped with my guidance? 

I’d done my best to make my sitting room tranquil. The harsh reds present across all hell’s decor were softened with deep plums and golds. Two cushioned chairs sat before a crackling fire. Soft jazz plays from a radio Alastor kindly enchanted for me. His rampages can’t come through it which he complained was a waste before I reminded him that our friendship didn’t put sinners at ease. Honestly, my association with him made my work harder, but that damned loyalty I’d always held tight remained a stubborn thorn I could never entirely root out. 

I took a sip of tea from the small table between us. The sheep hadn’t touched her cup or the plate of cookies. This is typical. In hell, precious little is given for free. The women who find their way to me know this better than most. 

“How did you hear about me?”

She gulped. “S-some women delivered Vox a Carmine shipment. I’d come for a job, but they told me I shouldn’t sign with the Vees. They said it’s best to sign with you instead.”

A soft smile teased my lips. I wondered which gals of mine delivered the shipment. Then, my heart sank. This sheep had escaped a fate worse than death. Many others hadn’t. I can’t save them once they are under contract with another Overlord. 

“They told you right. The Vees promise fame, money, and shelter. In exchange, you sell your soul for eternity, and they can do whatever they want to you. Val is especially ruthless in the ways he tortures his contractees. With me, it’s different. You will sign a soul contract with one of my associates, but it will only be for fifty years.  Ownership of your soul reverts back to you at the conclusion of the contract. After that, you can choose to renew it or move on with your life with no strings attached.You may choose the kind of work you do for my associates and even participate in a brief shadowing period with other contractees of each to help you make an informed choice.”

The sheep was understandably hesitant. “That sounds too good to be true. Every Overlord I know bargains to have your soul forever. Why would it be different with you?”

“I am very powerful, my dear. These contracts are a favor to me.”

“A favor? I’ve heard rumors you are friends with the Radio Demon. And you seem to know Carmilla Carmine too. Why do you want me to make a deal with another overload for my soul instead of you?”

I chomp on a cookie. My answer to the sinners is always simple and vague: I have no need for soul deals, and I want to protect women. It’s also true. No matter how many times I’m asked, I also can’t help but remember why I do this. 

***

Thousands of years ago, I walked the Earth just like them. It never ceases to amaze me how far humanity had come in the years since my death. They’d industrialized, made wondrous technology, and- supposedly- had created a more just world. Yet, women seemed to still be in a lower class, trapped and suffering under the whims of men. 

I should have died destitute when my husband died in war. Senseless war no humans even remember now. My brother-in-law and father-in-law died too leaving three widows with no prospects in a desolate village. My sister-in-law left us to return to her home. This made sense. She spoke fondly of her family. I’d never had much family before my marriage. Or after in many ways. Marriage wasn’t for love back then. My husband and I survived together. We should have had children, but he died too soon. He treated me as a thing the way most men did. My sister-in-law and I spoke little and only connected over the labor expected of us. My mother-in-law was different. I’d never experienced kindness before her. Once I’d had a taste, I knew I’d never leave her or allow harm to come to her. So, I didn’t leave her. I defied social convention by forsaking my family and even my religion to stay with her. It was audacious and scandalous, but I didn’t care. My loyalty knew no bounds.

***

Alastor told me my story had been detailed in the Bible. The bastard even tried to make a radio special out of the story just to piss me off. Cheeky prick. It sours my stomach. Some people read about my life and take it as a model of why you should trust God. Others read it as a love story. It’s neither. I did marry a man named Boaz at my mother-in-law Naomi's recommendation. He was kind for a man of his time and very old when we wed. I married him as a young woman of barely eighteen. I’d been first married at thirteen. After our marriage, I lived as happily ever after as a woman back then could. I didn’t go hungry. I had minimal duties in bed since he was too old to have much lust. I birthed one baby boy I loved but never truly knew since I died when he was young. I died at an old age compared to so many others then- twenty-five- and ascended to heaven. Once there, my mortal connections faded from importance as a new task was given to me. 

When God told me I’d be wed in heaven, I figured he meant to Boaz. This didn’t thrill me, but it didn’t bother me either. Boaz and I had gotten on well enough in life, so afterlife should’ve been the same. 

Whaddup, baby!

Adam. The first man. A man made in God’s own image. The. Absolute. Fucking. Worst. I’d been sold a sob story about him. He’d been virtuous and good, yet he had lost two wives to the temptations of evil incarnate. He’d been such a good man the very devil had to punish him by stealing away his loves- one through marriage and the other through an apple that brought evil to the world. In heaven, Lucifer couldn’t reach me, so I didn’t have to worry about being tempted. Besides, opposed to Lilith and Eve, two women described to me as greedy and selfish, I’d shown myself to be compassionate and fiercely loyal with my actions on earth. I’d be the perfect eternal bride for poor, lonely Adam.

It was a great honor. I’d been gifted a powerful angelic form. My new, divine being was beautiful. Ethereal even. Heaven celebrated our wedding with fanfare that lasted at least a century. We settled into a large estate overlooking unbelievably beautiful forests and mountains (I wanted something like Eden, but better since that fucking snake can’t get in) and tried to learn to love each other.

I intended to love him. His story tugged at my heartstrings. Everyone- even God himself- said this was a good but broken man and it was my job to fix him. To love him unconditionally. To make him happy. So, I tried. I did in death everything women were trained to do since birth in life. I cooked. I cleaned. I mothered and smothered and never bothered him with any of my own troubles. I was patient. I forgave his indiscretions. I obeyed. In all areas of our married life I obeyed no matter how uncomfortable my obedience made me.

And he treated me like shit. 

***

“I want to help women. I’ve known in life and death how easily we are oppressed. I understand it’s hard to believe, but frankly you either will or you won’t. If you stay and give this a chance, you won’t regret it. I’ve yet to have a woman ally herself with me and do so as you’ll hear if you shadow some of them. But I won’t force you. You can leave right now if you wish.”

The sheep gulped. A torrent of emotions fizzed around me. Years of practice allowed me to block them out. 

“Alright. Which overlords can I choose from?”

My grin split wide. “I’m so glad you asked.” 

***

“How is my latest gal doing?” I asked while stirring a vial of blood into Rosie’s cup prior to bringing it out on my serving tray.

“Which one? The little lamb? She’s a doll. Very unassuming which makes her perfect for the job. She’s still learning the ropes, but I’m pleased with the reports I’ve gotten on her training.” 

Carmilla huffed good-naturedly, reaching for one of the two blood-free cups. “We need more women to get into weapons engineering. They choose you because they get free clothes and access to parties.”

She spoke the truth. Some of Rosie’s souls worked around Cannibal Town as shop keeps but most slipped through the hottest spots in hell unseen and unheard gathering information she’d use to her advantage. Rosie became an Overlord through connections more than intimidation (though her army of cannibals were certainly not to be trifled with), and I always respected that about her. Carmilla’s souls had more standard jobs throughout her company. Whenever a woman of science came along, I always tried to talk up the perks of Carmine Industries. Carmilla was one of the smartest women I’d ever had the pleasure of meeting, and she prized intelligence in the souls she made deals with. 

Rosie and I became fast friends once Alastor introduced us. She was the first Overlord I made deals with. Carmilla took some time to come around to the idea. She reminded me of myself in a lot of ways. Beneath her tough exterior lay a woman with ample empathy and fierce loyalty. Once I earned her trust, we became good friends. The three of us met for tea at least once a year to chat, keep tabs on each other’s power (subtly of course), and commiserate about the unique position of being a female overlord. Or, in my case, an honorary female overlord. 

“Speaking of my newest addition, we’ll need to coordinate calendars soon, love. There’s a few meetings I’d love for you to sit in on.”

“Of course. I’m sure I can make time.” 

It’s not a choice. This is my end of the bargain. I use my unique talents to help them get ahead, and they protect souls with the contract terms I prescribe while maintaining an alliance with me. Everyone wins. Or, everyone comes as close to winning as hell will allow. 

Before I can inquire about these meetings, a chill runs up my spine. It takes all my millenniums of acquired self-discipline not to react. That feels like… it can’t be…  

“I’m feeling peckish. Be right back.” 

I left for my kitchenette and saw what I’d expected. I still raised an eyebrow in surprise. A faceless shadow waved at me, slapped an envelope on my counter, and disappeared into the floorboards. I slashed it open. Familiar script greeted me.

Salutations, my dear,

I’m back. I know it’s unseemly to request you come to work so soon after my return but I think you’ll find this task quite entertaining. Come to the address below. Prepare to check in for some time.

• Your deerly missed friend

“You fucker,” I breathed with a laugh. The address read: The Hazbin Hotel (formerly the pitifully named Happy Hotel). Newest misguided venture of the princess of Hell, leering over Pride from a hill outside the Doomsday District. An eye-sore truly no one could miss! 

I grabbed a tray of cookies and returned to the tea. Rosie and Carmilla were none the wiser to the huge development that would soon shake up hell. I let a slip of urgency flow from me, a feeling of needing to go accomplish important tasks. Tea still dragged on for another quarter hour. I couldn’t use my powers as heavily as I’d liked since Rosie had an incredible sensitivity to them. She left with Carmilla, neither cognizant of my manipulations. I sprung into action. Suitcase charmed to connect to my closet. Extra blood brownies from the tea wrapped for travel. Outfit an impeccable, modest 20s style dress topped off with a cloche hat. Time to see what my ridiculous, dear friend had been up to for the last seven years. 

***

It hurt when I fell from heaven. It hurt a lot. I’d stupidly assumed the harshness of my human life paired with the torture of my afterlife would prepare me for the horrors of hell. Nope. I scraped myself off the sidewalk, heaving bile as I fought to limp somewhere, anywhere. Most sinners gawked at me. My spectacular, rapid descent in a comet of white flames made it clear I wasn’t a regular sinner. A handful of others came at me. To capture me or kill me, I never found out. A blast of holy light took care of them. I didn’t mean to obliterate them. I didn’t even know I had that power. Yet, what’s done was done. In the place of the gang coming at me with teeth out and weapons drawn was nothing. A scene of cacophony unfolded as sinners fled in panic or cocked their guns. I forced myself to run. Bullets pelted me but couldn’t penetrate my skin. After a few blocks, I remembered I could fly. I took to the skies and gaped in horror at my new home. Ruined buildings. Fires. Explosions. Bloodshed and violence at every turn. What have I done? What was I thinking? On the outskirts of town, a forest of gnarled thorns and thick, black leafed trees sprawled out. I dove into the overgrowth, found a tree to curl into, and cried myself to sleep. 

My wounds healed within a day. Those inflicted by Adam used to take much longer. I remembered the way the bullets from the sinners bounced off me and realized only another angel could harm me. That was a relief. My clothes weren’t built for my new life. I tore my long, billowing robe so it rested just below my knees. My sleeves came off next. I used the excess fabric to tie back my long hair. I felt feral, and I liked it. For all Adam’s abrasiveness, he preferred his wife to be pristine. Perfect, poised, dainty. Defenseless. Not anymore.

I spent the next two days perched atop abandoned buildings studying the sinners. The lawlessness of the land became apparent fast. I also saw that sinners couldn’t die from the wounds they inflicted on each other. I vomited several times when I first saw the limbs strewn across the road after a violent encounter begin to sew themselves back together. From bits of conversations, I learned that Overlords ran hell. They made deals for souls to gain power. Lucifer never came up which I found odd. Every now and then a sinner noted a love for Lilith’s latest album. I hoped I never ran into the rulers of hell. Or Eve. It’d be too awkward. At one point, the sound of scream penetrated the air. Radios everywhere vibrated with the agonized sounds. It seemed to go on forever until a voice replaced the carnage. 

“This is your regular reminder not to mess with the Radio Demon. Now, back to the show.”

A jazz number played. Sinners went on as usual. I gathered this happened regularly. Conversation turned to this new, terrifying Overlord. He’d taken out many of the previous overlords and- rumor had it- ate their corpses. I swore to myself I’d avoid the Radio Demon at all costs. This agreement remained until nightfall two days later. One moment I glared at the distant star of heaven through the tree branches while tossing and turning on the sharp gravel beneath me, the next my vision filled with a big shadow.

“Hello, sweetheart.”

The Radio Demon’s voice. I jerked to my feet. He looked different than I’d imagined. The shadows were horrifying, and the sharp yellow teeth put a knot in my stomach. Otherwise, the Radio Demon stood like the picture of a gentleman in a dapper suit with his hands crossed behind his back. Yet, my observations had taught me that in hell looks were deceiving.

“Stay away from me or I’ll vaporize you.”

He stood still. “I don’t doubt that. You’ve been the talk of the town since you did away with half of McGregor’s loan sharks in your little scuffle. Something I must thank you for, by the way. Nasty gentlemen they were, and if I’d have done the deed I’d have been tempted to waste food. Sharks make for quite an unsavory meal.” I gulped. “You have no need to fear. I’m not foolish enough to attempt to harm an angel. No, no I’m here to help you, darling.”

“No, thank you. I don’t need your help.”

He gave a skeptical look at my attire and makeshift bed. “Are you sure? Take a look at yourself.” He twitched his fingers and a mirror appeared. I flinched at my appearance. My makeshift dress had rips that showed an immodest amount of my legs. My hair hung around my chin in large knots tangled with odd shrubbery. My eyes carried dark circles that reflected my lack of sleep while my stomach grumbled from hunger. “This is no place for a holy being such as yourself to stay. I could help you acquire a mansion with the finest clothes and food you could imagine. A heaven in hell, if you will.”

“No, thank you,” I said, firmer this time. “I don’t want or need nice things. I’m fine on my own, so leave.”

Another wave of his fingers made the mirror vanish. “Fine on your own? It’s clear you’re too frightened to enter our hellish society. Will you live in these woods forever? While you’ve done a better job remaining hidden than I’d anticipated, you can’t escape notice forever. A few sinners have noticed a woman flying into the woods each night. Soon, other overlords will make the connection and with the news of these exterminations Lucifer agreed to I’m sure they’d be eager to-”

My heart stopped. “What are you talking about? What exterminations?”

He raised an eyebrow. “With all your sneaking around, didn’t you grab a newspaper? It made the top headlines everywhere in hell yesterday. Apparently, heaven has made a deal with our wonderful rulers to come down once every decade and slaughter as many sinners they can get their grubby little wings on. The first one will be in a fortnight. I happen to know that many Overlords are eager to get their hands on you. Not everyone believes there’s an angel in hell, but those that do are eager to test out different methods of killing you.” 

I couldn’t breathe. This couldn’t be happening. Adam couldn’t be coming here. It had to be Adam behind these sudden exterminations, of course. He used to rant about his ideas of slaughtering all of hell with his idiot friends for hours. He’d pitched it during heavenly council meetings a few times, but always got turned down. My departure must have changed things, somehow. He’d been given the green light. 

It all hit me at once. The abuse I’d endured for the past several thousand years. The injustice, hypocrisy, and apathy in heaven for my plight. The brutality of hell. The hopelessness of my position. I didn’t realize I’d collapsed or started hyperventilating. The world swirled around me. Someone blabbered about how they can’t be hurt by him again. Was that me? Was I dying? I was dying, oh fuck, I was dying, I-

A firm hand on my shoulder interrupted my panic. Gentle music resonated in my ears as a voice encouraged me to breathe slow and deep. I began to come back to sanity. The woods had been replaced with a cozy living room. I lay on the couch with the demon kneeling beside me. I whipped my head around in confusion and saw the woods beyond the wall in front me. The Radio Demon had somehow transported this cozy room into the forest. 

“I hope my home is to your liking,” he said. 

“Your home?”

It fit in a strange way. A large radio rested on an open-faced cabinet full of records to the left of the couch. Two bookshelves cluttered with volumes about voodoo, hunting, and music sat to the right. The walls were covered with animal skulls and taxidermized deer heads. 

“Of course. I couldn’t leave you to faint onto the dirty forest floor, could I? I’m a gentleman, after all.” His face sobered at these words. He conjured a stool for himself and sat. “The first man I killed was my father.”

I struggled to understand his words. “W-what?”

“I was fifteen. I wish I regretted it, but I don’t. My only regret is not acting sooner. He was a cruel, vile man who spent his days torturing the single kindest soul who ever graced the earth. My ma. You remind me of her in some ways. She was stubborn, unwilling to accept help, and so willing to suffer so as not to bother others. My father was the first man I killed for laying his hands on a woman, but not the last.”

In my vulnerable state, my defenses had fallen. I felt his words. The rage towards his father. The aching love for his mother. The honesty of the story he’d shared. 

“You really feel that fiercely about this," I whispered with awe. "Why are you telling me the truth?”

He peered at me, and I realized my mistake. He didn’t comment on my ability to discern his emotions or the truth of his words right then, however. “As I said, you remind me of my mother. I’ll never claim to be a good man. You’ve been in hell long enough to hear my broadcasts. Power is much more appealing to me than altruism the vast majority of the time, but there’s always been an exception. I’ll do what I can to protect women like my mother. Always have, always will.”

This, too, dripped with honesty. I sat up. “That’s kind of you. No offense, though, but I think I’m more powerful than you.”

He laughed. “I know you are. I can sense the magic humming from you. It’s unlike anything I’ve come across before. I assumed you’d been cast out of heaven like our king and queen, but that’s not true, is it? You chose to leave to escape a monster.” I nodded. “And this monster is somehow tied to these exterminations?”

“He’ll probably be leading them. I think they’re my fault. Me leaving must have sent him over the edge or maybe heaven is letting them happen so he can come find me and punish me.” My stomach lurched. “Oh, God.”

“Breathe, sweetheart. No good will come of panicking. In and out. I’ll help you.”

My eyes snapped to his. “How? You can’t protect me from Adam. He can kill any mortal soul with a snap of his finger. He…and me…we’re not like other souls that went to heaven. We were blessed with more power.”

Again, I slipped and gave more information than I’d intended and again the Radio Demon didn’t comment. “I happen to know the exterminations will only happen in the Pride ring. There’s six others that will be safe for you. I cannot travel there since Lucifer bound mortal sinners to this realm, but as an angel those restrictions shouldn’t apply to you. I can find you safe passage elsewhere. I hear Lust is wonderful this time of year.”

“You’d do that for me?”

He smiled, sharp and calculating. “I shall. For a price.”

“I thought you said you’d always help women who remind you of your mother?”

“I will, but not for free. Again, my dear, power is so much more fun than altruism, and I’m not fool enough to lose the chance to make a deal with an angel.” 

If he hadn't been honest with me, I’d have walked away then. I think Alastor knew that. Yet, he had been honest. He meant it when he said he had a soft spot for battered women. He spoke the truth when he said he could find a safe place for me when Adam came. I made a decision that would shape the rest of my afterlife. I trusted the Radio Demon.

“What’s the price? And don’t say my soul. I don’t care if you could offer me the powers of God himself. You’re not getting that.” 

He frowned. “Fine. But if you won’t bargain your soul, I’ll need a lifetime of service. I think you can sense the emotions of others and whether people are telling the truth or lying. This is an invaluable ability to me. Combine that with your handy vaporizing power and you’ll be my most prized employee. You work for me, helping me as I need, and in return I’ll arrange for your safe passage to other realms of hell during exterminations and provide with you all your material needs. You’ll live quite comfortably in hell and want for nothing.” 

“You do know I’m immortal, right? And, from what I’ve experienced thus far, very hard to kill. A lifetime of service is a long time.”

He shrugged. “You’ll just have to hope I die someday, then.” 

“I won’t destroy sinners for you. I’m pretty sure a blow with my magic is permanent. That’s not right. A sinner shouldn’t lose their soul forever just for disagreeing with you.”

“On that, we disagree.” We locked eyes. He glared at me before huffing. “You’re quite stubborn. Be flattered, darling. I don’t haggle in my deals, but for you I’ll make an exception. How about you only strike down a sinner if they pose a threat to my life?”

“A threat you can regenerate from?” 

His eye twitched. “Yes. If it's any comfort, no sinner has come close to harming in such a way. I’m the most powerful Overlord in hell. The only current threats to me are our king and queen, and I doubt we’ll cross paths anytime soon. Lucifer never leaves the palace, and Lillith spends most of her time vacationing in the other rings as of late.” 

“I hope you know I won’t stand a chance against them if you ever do piss them off. Lucifer is a Seraphim and Lilith… well, I don't actually know about her. But Seraphim are a whole other level of power.” 

“I won’t ask you to fight any big, scary angels. Now, do we have a deal?” He held out his hand to shake. 

“Slow down, there. I need this to be writing. And I’m going to review it several times. It’s going to be a long night.” 

“Clever girl.”

He conjured up some of the finest alcohol hell had to offer. I drank none of it. This deal would be made sober. He tried to trick me into a soul bargain or other nefarious conditions with several different clauses. I caught them all. I giggled when he growled in frustration after I caught his twentieth attempt.

“I’m literally thousands of years old and have had all that time to perfect the art of reading the fine print. In fact, I lived during the first attempts at putting ideas down in writing. Cut yourself some slack. You can’t be more than a century old.”

At long last, the contract was signed and the partnership between Alastor the Radio Demon and Ruth the Angel of Hell began.

Chapter Text

Enter the Ensemble 

"While they were enjoying themselves, some of the wicked men of the city surrounded the house. Pounding on the door, they shouted to the old man who owned the house, 'Bring out the man who came to your house so we can have sex with him.' The owner of the house went outside and said to them, 'No, my friends, don’t be so vile. Since this man is my guest, don’t do this outrageous thing. Look, here is my virgin daughter, and his concubine. I will bring them out to you now, and you can use them and do to them whatever you wish. But as for this man, don’t do such an outrageous thing.'"

Judges 19:22-24

The Hazbin Hotel did stand out. I raised an eyebrow at its run down appearance. I’d expected finer lodgings given the princess of hell ran it. Nerves rumbled through my belly. I disguised my human appearance with a simple charm Alastor taught me that made my eyes appear red, my teeth appear pointed, and my skin appear a sallow gray common in hell. I’d yet to have a demon see through it, but with seraphim magic I couldn’t be sure it’d hold. Hopefully Princess Morningstar hadn’t inherited all of her father’s power. 

“Ruth, my darling!” Alastor materialized beside me at the start of my climb up the hill. “It’s been too long.”

“Entirely too long. You look well.” 

I’d worried about him during his seven year absence. He would never confirm it, but I knew Alastor had made a deal with someone very powerful. Not an overlord. No, someone or something integral to hell’s foundation. I guessed that’s how he gained magic strong enough for him to take out countless overlords in his rise to power. I also knew this deal had to come at a high price. When he told me he’d be taking a long sabbatical, I called him out. It’s the only time he raised his voice at me, and the conversation ceased. I felt one emotion, strong and clear, before he’d stalked away: fear. 

“Of course, my dear. How’ve you been? You look rested. Where’re you returning from with this latest extermination? Envy? Lust? I’m sure you’re glad to have missed it. Just look at the bodies still piling in the streets!”

I winced at the reminder. “We can and will catch up later. First, explain this. Since when are you interested in our princess?”

A wall of magic blocked me from reading his emotions. We both knew this itself spoke volumes. “I’ve had a long time to rest. This is simply a venture for entertainment. Dearest Charlie believes she can redeem sinners and get them into heaven! Such a ridiculous venture spearheaded by someone so overbearingly naive will surely produce hysterical results.”

“Wait. The princess is trying to send sinners to heaven? Heaven agreed to this?”

Alastor shrugged. “I’m sure she has more details. I’m just the host.”

“Right. What’s my role here?”

“How does executive chef sound? With your delightful baking skills, our continental breakfast will be the talk of the town.”

I smiled. “Alright, you got me. That sounds like a fun official role. But unofficially? You’re getting dangerously close to violating our deal even putting me in the same room as the princess. The contract says you can’t involve me with the royals.”

“Actually, our deal says you won’t be involved with Lucifer or Lilith Morningstar. Sweet Charlotte is never mentioned.”

I stopped walking. He smiled wide at me. “I didn’t know they’d had a daughter back then. I didn’t even know they’d be able to- dammit.” I glared at him without much heat. I couldn’t blame him for being a shrewd businessman. “I caught all your other tricks,” I said as we neared the door.

“Yes, you have always been a formidable opponent. That’s why I’m glad we’re allies.”

“Friends, Al. I know you view me as one.” He hummed in agreement. “She might see through my disguise.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, this is sure to be an interesting experience. Now, let’s not keep our new acquaintances waiting.”

The door swung open before I could reach for the handle. A barrel of tall, blonde demon tackled me in a hug.

“Ruth, right? It’s so nice to meet you! Always nice to meet another friend of Alastor’s. Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!”

I blinked as she pulled away. Alastor shot me an amused look. Thankfully, my demonic disguise seemed to remain intact through her eyes. 

“Thank you, your highness.”

She waved the formal address away. “Charlie, please. Come in. I’ll introduce you to everyone. This is Vaggie, Angel Dust, Nifty, and Husk! Vaggie’s my girlfriend. Nifty is our housekeeper, and Husk is-”

“We’ve met,” the cat demon snarled. I held back a wince.

My deal with Alastor kept him from having me physically harm demons barring a threat to his life, but he used me to harm them in countless other ways. My insights about the former gambling overlord’s emotions and bluffs as they faced off in a poker game turned the tide in Alastor’s favor. The prize for the winner: Husk’s soul.

Husk found out and tried to void the deal, but he’d played against the ultimate deal maker. The terms of the game were worded to allow my participation. He couldn’t take it back. I agreed the game had been rigged, but this was hell. Fairness didn’t exist down here. There were only the terms one agreed to and the consequences that followed. 

“Oh,” Charlie said, sensing the bad blood. “Right. Last is Angel Dust, our guest.”

The lanky spider demon winked at me. “No introduction needed, I’m sure.”

“Why is that?”

Husk snorted at Angel Dust’s appalled expression. “Why- Did you hear what she said? I’m Angel Dust. Ten time Sexxxie award winner. Top star for Valentino Studios?”

At the name Valentino, my face darkened. “I see.”

He shot me a weird look. “What are you supposed to be doin’ here anyway?”

“Ruth will be our executive chef. While she’s never mastered jambalaya, I assure you she’s quite the cordon bleu,” Alastor said. 

“Speaking of,” I opened my parcel of brownies. “I brought these for you.”

Charlie’s eyes lit up. “Are those brownies? They look sooo good!” I stopped her from reaching for one. “They are. Blood brownies. Alastor has unique tastes.” Vaggie pulled her girlfriend’s hand back while Charlie’s mouth twisted. “Don’t worry, I make food for non-cannibals too. That’s my preference, actually.”

Charlie tittered awkwardly. “Right. Well, how about a tour? We'll also set up a room for you.”

“Lead the way, dear,” Alastor said while passing the parcel of sweets off to an eager Nifty. At least, most of the parcel. He'd never been one for desserts, but I smirked as he still magicked one away to enjoy later. My treats were the only ones he enjoyed. 

The tour showed me more of the hotel's run down state. Bugs propagated in every room despite Nifty's best attempts to stab them. The wallpaper peeled, the lights flickered, and the carpet held numerous questionable stains. Yet, Charlie's emotions about the hotel resulted in me feeling charmed by it all. The ferocity of her feelings stunned me. In hell, wearing your heart on your sleeve left you vulnerable to manipulation. Perhaps the Princess's power protected her so she didn't have to worry?

I wished I could convince myself of that, but Alastor had spoken rightly about her naivety. This girl, somehow, was a truly good person. Empathetic. Idealistic. So easy to exploit. Her girlfriend's wariness and scowls made a lot more sense the more Charlie spoke. I found myself adopting a similar protectiveness. My role in hell had always been to protect women since not even God himself would. All at once I knew I'd protect this woman too, no deals needed. I wouldn't let hell take away such vibrant hope. I’d have to play my cards carefully to balance my deal with Alastor. 

After the tour, I retired to my new room to rest. All in all, it was nice. I moved in my clothes with my enchanted suitcase, arranged a few favorite books on the nightstand while vowing to check out the hotel library soon, and hid my most prized possession: the grimoire that allowed me to travel between the realms of hell. While customs stations existed for hellborns, we were wary of me using them since they were warded to keep out sinners. We weren’t sure if my angelic magic would be spotted by those wards and agreed not to risk it. 

I couldn't perform magic the way Alastor could. Learning to do so required me to learn a medium such as Voodoo or make soul deals. I decided against it. My angelic powers carried me as far as I needed. I didn't need or care to seek more.

The next morning I woke up ready to impress. Alastor made sure the kitchen held any ingredients I could need. Compared to the rest of the hotel, the kitchen was in top shape. I nodded in approval at the industrial stove tops and refrigerators. This would do nicely. 

When I first arrived in heaven, I'd marveled at the sheer volume of food available. I'd been alive in times of famine. Hunger and creating meals from literally anything one could scrounge up were all I'd known. I became obsessed with cooking, a hobby Adam encouraged. Most accomplished chefs ended up in hell. I sought them out after my fall to learn from the best. I held no regrets even after being called an “idiot sandwich.”

“Something smells good .” 

Angel wandered in first and gaped at the spread. French toast. Waffles. Fruit compote. Omelets. Bacon. Sausage. Hashbrowns. Fresh squeezed orange juice. All plated to perfection. 

“Holy shit! I knew I liked ya, toots,” Angel began to stuff his face and moan without shame.

I laughed. “Glad you’re enjoying it.”

Husk stumbled in next. “Before you eat, drink this,” I said as I handed him a glass. He sniffed at the green liquid. 

“The fuck is this?”

“It’ll help your hangover.”

He shrugged and chugged it. His posture perked up a bit. “Not bad.”

“OH MY GOSH! This is amazing! Thank you sooo much!” 

“Just doing my job,” I told the princess who bounced up and down beside Vaggie. 

“Didn’t I tell you this belle is the best chef in hell?” Alastor said. “Though this table is sorely lacking in meat, my dear.”

“Don’t insult me, Al. Your plate is in the back. Let me get it.” 

I got his plate and prepped my own. Chatter and chaos went around as we ate. Alastor and I had to hold Nifty back from diving face first into french toast. Angel’s moans got more erotic with each bite, presumably to annoy Husk. Charlie chattered about her ideas for the hotel and the extensive list of today’s activities. It was nice. I realized that outside my occasional meetings with Rosie and Carmilla, I hadn’t socialized in…how long had it been? 

“So, how long ya been in hell, toots?” 

Oh, right. This is one reason I rarely interacted with others. Too many secrets to hide. “I think it's going on a century now.”

“Damn. A whole century and you never heard of me? You sure you’ve never come across my work? I was in Gagged and Pegged, Fuck My Captor Volumes I, II, and III, Cuck and Su -”

“I’m quite sure.”

“Why do you care? She ain’t exactly your type.” Husk grumbled.

“She might not be mine, but I happen to be everyone’s.” I laughed. Angel paused, as if surprised I found him genuinely funny, before quickly masking it. “I’ll convert you. We’ve gotta go shopping sometime. I can tell you’re a grandma down here with those clothes. We gotta get you in something sexy.”

“Oooh, a shopping trip! That sounds SO fun!”

“Well, why don’t we go then?” Angel asked. “Especially if it’s on your dime, princess.”

Vaggie bristled at that remark, but Charlie was oblivious. “I wish, but we really need to finish the commercial for the hotel. Alastor, is it almost ready?”

“It sure is, dear. We can view it now, if you’d like.” I squinted at my friend, knowing full well he held an irrational hatred for any forms of media outside radio. He wiggled his eyebrows at me. Uh oh. Poor Charlie. 

Charlie and her girlfriend went with Alastor to preview the commercial while I tackled the dishes with Nifty, the only one who didn’t mysteriously vanish when the chore was mentioned. I liked her, but she also proved an enigma. Clearly, she was a grown woman yet she seemed so childlike. And psychotic. I wondered what her life on Earth had been like. Did she even remember it? Once the last dish was dried, she scampered off to hunt bugs. I found myself alone. While usually comforting, it suddenly felt…stifling.

“VAGGIE HOLY SHIT!”

I peeked my head out the kitchen and saw Charlie frantically waving her girlfriend over. I think she intended to keep her phone call a secret, but we all easily heard her say, “My dad just called. He asked if I could meet the leader of the angel army. He doesn’t want to go, so he asked if I could go instead.” She began gasping out of excitement. 

I froze, cold with fear. Alastor moved closer to me, a silent message to pull myself together before I gave any of my secrets away. I took a deep breath and let my fear turn to anger. Charlie’s father was obviously the devil, the most damned being in creation, but what kind of deadbeat dad sent his daughter to meet with Adam? Charlie deserved better. Rage began to simmer in my belly. Alastor’s head cocked curiously, but I said nothing. 

“But the extermination just happened. What could they want so soon after-” Vaggie was cut off by Charlie singing out the door. She followed her girlfriend into the bloody streets of hell. I noticed in Charlie’s excitement to leave her hellphone had fallen to the floor. 

“Excuse me, friend.” I said to Alastor before grabbing the phone and beginning to stalk up to my room. A shadow pooled beneath my feet before he appeared in front of me.

“I believe that doesn’t belong to you.” He reached for it, but I wrenched my hand back. “What, pray tell, is your plan?”

“I’m going to give that lousy piece of shit a piece of my mind.”

“I don’t think hellphones have service to heaven.”

“No, not Adam. Charlie’s garbage father.”

“Weren’t you the one terrified of the big, scary fallen angel?”

“Well, now I’m pissed at him.”

I tried to move past him, but he stepped to block my path. “I don’t think it’s him you’re mad at. I think he’s just an easier target for your wrath than the angel who truly terrifies you. The angel poor Charlotte is going to see right now. Isn’t your anger better served by going with her to her meeting?”

My heart stopped. I felt my hands begin to quiver. My stomach lurched. “I’m doing this. Get out of my way.” He let me pass this time. 

“Do try not to get vaporized. I’d loathe to lose a friend.” 

I made it to my room and opened her phone (her passcode was 1234 because of course it was). I scrolled through her contacts until I found the one I was looking for: dad. It rang. And rang. And rang. Was that no good, son a bitch not even going to answer for his-

“Heyyyyyy, bitch!”

I balked at the phone. “Excuse you?”

“Huh? Who is this?”

“My name is Ruth. I’m a friend of Charlie’s. But the better question is who the fuck do you think you are?”

“What? Where’s Charlie?”

“Charlie is in danger thanks to you, you stupid-”

I was cut off by a flash of light and then a strong hand slamming me into the wall. A throat squeezed my windpipe. Six wings filled my vision surrounding a short man with an inferno in his eyes. An inferno fixated on me.

“Where is my daughter?”

I’m not sure what I thought was going to happen. In fact, upon hearing sweet Charlie was going to see Adam, I think my brain had short circuited and stopped thinking altogether. And now I had to face the consequences of my actions. The devil had me quite literally in his grasp, and no one was coming to save me.

Chapter Text

A New Deal

 ^"I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man. The husband is the head of his wife. God is the head of Christ.  If any man prays or preaches with his head covered, he does not give honor to Christ.  Every woman who prays or preaches without her head covered does not respect her head. It is the same as if she had her hair cut off."

1 Corinthians 11:3-5

“Where is my daughter?”

I’d gotten used to feeling invincible in hell, but the seraphim’s punishing grip quickly reminded me that my eternal life was by no means guaranteed.

“I-I...” I couldn’t breathe. Lucifer didn’t seem to be noting how he impeded any attempt to answer his question. The world began fading in and out. Vaguely, I found it amusing that it wouldn’t be Adam or God to end me. Nope, it’d be the real big bad, the boogie man I’d always been taught fear but never truly thought of as a tangible threat.

“Charlotte is safe at her meeting with the angels,” Alastor’s voice cut in from behind us.

Lucifer’s grip loosened enough for me to gasp in some air. He blinked, as if just then realizing how much he’d been hurting me, and released me. I fell to the ground, clawing at my throat while gulping in air. 

“What?” Lucifer asked. “Who are you?”

“I’m Alastor, the Radio Demon. Pleasure to meet you, quite a pleasure. I apologize for my associate. It seems she didn’t think through her words before she called you.”

The king of hell turned back to me, face drawn in confusion and irritation. “If she’s safe, why did you say she’s in danger?”

I rolled to my knees, recovering my breath. “She’s meeting with Adam, the leader of the exorcists, a completely soulless son of a bitch. He slaughters your people in droves every year without remorse, and you trust her to meet with him alone?”

Lucifer blinked and rubbed the back of his head. “Well, when you put it that way it sounds bad. But she’s my daughter and a hellborn. He wouldn’t dare hurt her. That would mean war.”

I stared at him. “Are you sure he wouldn’t go that far?”

His brow furrowed. “You seem to know a lot about him for a demon.” His stare intensified. I could feel my glamour slip away under his gaze. Recognizing I’d been caught, I let it drop to reveal my true form. “You’re not a demon. You’re an angel.” He blinked. “An angel with a halo and wings. You didn’t fall. How the fuck are you here? Who the fuck are you?”

“My name is Ruth. I’m here because I chose to be here.” 

“Perhaps a bit more detail is warranted at this stage, dear,” Alastor said while helping me to my feet. “Ruth chose to leave heaven to escape her abhorrent treatment by her husband there.”

Lucifer rubbed his temples. “Abusive angel husband, huh? Let me guess: Adam.”

“Quite.” 

“How does this keep happening to me? Always having that bastard’s wives dropped in my lap to save them,” he grumbled.

“Hey, I haven’t been dropped in anyone’s lap, and I sure as hell don’t need saving.” Alastor cleared his throat pointedly. “Oh, shut up,” I said to him before continuing to Lucifer, “I made my way down here, and I’ll keep doing so. I just wanted to make sure Charlie was safe. She’s young and full of dreams, and I believe in her ability to make change down here, but she’s too naive for hell. She needs people looking out for her, especially since her parents seem to have left her to fend for herself.” 

“I didn’t leave her to fend for herself.”

The words buzzed in my brain. The undertone of a lie was there, but it felt faint. He isn't sure if it's a lie. His thoughts and feelings are a mess. “Really? You’ve been around, supporting her? She’s the princess of hell, but I saw her get relentlessly mocked on live TV by Katie Killjoy. This hotel is in a dire state, and she seems to be desperately looking for help to get it running. I mean, pretty much all the staff and necessary repairs have been supplied by Alastor. So where have you been? Or her mother? You call her to do favors for you, but you haven’t seemed to lift a finger to help support her ambitions.”

Lucifer stepped back as if I’d punched him. I could’ve sworn I saw tears gather in his eyes. “I…I’ve got to go.” He blipped out of the room in an instant.

“Well, I hope you’re happy. Your secret is out, you were almost killed, and you still haven’t learned to hold your tongue when speaking to someone who could kill you in an instant. You’ve outdone yourself, truly.”

My neck flushed with shame. “I know,” I mumbled. “Sorry. And thank you for stepping in. I just thought about Charlie with him and, I don’t know, I just snapped.”

Alastor hummed. “You may want to consider that unconditional loyalty can lead you down the path of idiocy.”

I snorted. “Yeah. Stupid loyalty.” 

“Well, what’s done is done. No sense dwelling. Come, I’ve got a new recipe for ribs I’d love to try. You truly must learn not to be so timid with your seasoning, dear.”

I saw the offer for what it was: a chance to distract myself from whatever consequences would come next from my impulsivity. I took it. “I prefer not to burn off my taste buds.”

“Hm. You angels are so weak.”

“Whatever you say. Let’s go to the butcher and get what we need.”

***

“It was so weird. He just appeared, went on a long rant to Adam about how he needs to treat me as an equal and hear me out, and then had me redo my pitch. Then, at the end, Adam said he was moving up the exterminations to every six months before disappearing. Dad disappeared right after. I’ve never seen him like that. He seemed really angry and…sad.” Charlotte moved her mashed potatoes around her plate. I could feel Alastor’s gaze on me, but steadfastly fixed my eyes on my own plate of non-human ribs. 

“Huh. Well, if I were the big dick in charge and saw that prick talking to you like that, I’d be pissed too,” Angel said. “But, go back a sec. The exterminations are happening how often now?”

“Every six months,” Charlie said glumly. 

“And they didn’t say why?” Vaggie asked. 

Charlie shook her head before burying her head in her arms. “It’s hopeless! This was already so hard before but now our time table has been cut in half! How are we going to do this? We don’t have time! And what happens when they cut our time half again? And again? We just handle it, right? Just somehow figure out how to redeem the irredeemable and somehow make it work? Right?!” She began to hyperventilate. 

Vaggie put a hand on her shoulder, “Yes. That’s exactly what we’ll do.”

“Oh, please. We had less than half a chance when we started this whole thing. And now? Ain’t no silver lining this ti- OW!” Angel nursed the paw I’d stabbed with my fork. 

“We’ll make this work, Charlie,” I said. “You’re not figuring this out alone.” 

“Look, I’m just sayin’ everyone’s freaking the fuck out. Check out the Doomsday District,” Angel said while holding up his phone. Images of demons running through flaming streets, aimlessly killing, looting, and generally panicking filled the screen.

“You’re right,” Vaggie said slowly. “Sinners are desperate. Maybe desperate enough to try anything.”

Charlie lifted her head, eyes shining with hope. “You’re right! This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel. Alastor, do we still have those flyers? We can go now!” 

She jumped up, Vaggie following behind. I stood too. “She’s right. Let’s go canvas for the hotel.”

“Guilty conscience?” Alastor asked.

“Guilty of what?” Husk asked.

“Nothing!” I said. “And no. Just doing my job, helping this hotel be successful. What we should all be doing.”

“Hmm. Have fun.” 

Once on the streets, I split up from Vaggie and Charlie to cover more ground. Though, really, I did feel guilty. Maybe I’d made things worse for Charlie by pushing her father further away. What had I been thinking when I laid into him like that? What did I know of the royal family? 

“Stupid,” I muttered while kicking a flaming pebble and dodging errant bullets. “Ruth, you stupid, impulsive, weak-”

“Hey, that sounds like my internal monologue.” 

The world warped and twisted until with a pop I found myself someplace new and face to face with the king of hell once more. I jumped back, hands raised in a defensive position.

“Relax, I’m not going to hurt you." He's telling the truth. "Sorry about the whole choking you out thing, by the way. Truly. That was, ah, not my finest moment. I just want to talk.” 

My hand fell back to my sides. “Where am I?”

“My palace. I tend to draw a crowd when I go out on the streets. Not a big fan.”

“Right. And you brought me here because…?”

He gestured for me to sit. I realized I was in a large dining hall with a gargantuan table, ornate tapestries adorning the walls, a ridiculous gold chandelier hanging above our heads. I sat. Lucifer sat too, leaving a chair between us. 

“I brought you here because you were right.”

“Come again?”

He sighed. “You were right. I went to check on Charlie’s meeting and that son of a bitch was mocking her, trying to intimidate her with a bunch of his cronies, just being an absolute dick. And, I mean, he’s not exactly a prince to me, always bringing up how I slept with both his ex-wives-”

“Wait, you slept with Eve and Lilith?”

“-oh, yeah. Those two were dynamite together. Best sex of my life. Anyway-”

“Hold up. You all had a three-”

“ANYWAY, I never should have sent Charlie to meet with him alone. Then, I looked up that interview you mentioned, and let’s just say that news anchor bitch now understands what is and is not allowed on air concerning my family. And, don’t worry, Charlie’s hotel is about to get all the funding and staff it could need plus extra. You were right about everything. I wasn't there for her. I haven’t protected her.” He stared at me, suddenly somber. “I failed as her father, like I failed at everything else. But you were there for her. You tried to protect her. I brought you here because I need you to promise me you won’t stop. She needs someone looking out for her. Someone strong, with a good heart. I mean, you’re an angel, so you’re obviously not like the low life sinning filth down here. Please, keep being there for her.”

I sat back, stunned. “O-of course. That’s what I do. I protect women. Or, I try to, at least.”

“How do you do that?”

I briefly explained my alliances with the overlords.

“Why do you care about these sinners like that?" he asked. "You’re a winner. They’re sinners.”

“Did you not hear what I said? Winners aren’t always good. Sinners aren’t always bad. In this bullshit cosmic war between ‘good’ and ‘evil’ no one seems to really be trying to help the everyday folks caught in the middle. And women have long been oppressed and given the short end of the stick. Someone had to step up. So, I did.”

“And you really think you can change things? Like you said, this is a cosmic war that is much older than even you. There’s things at work you can’t hope to understand, much less stop.” 

He’d reached the root of many of my fears. He was right. Even after thousands of years of living, even after being blessed with immense angelic power, and even after allying myself with some of the most powerful demons in hell, I was just a small cog in an indiscernible machine. Yet, I returned to the answer I held close when I contemplated the meaning of it all on my countless nights of existence. 

“I can’t change everything. I can’t change everyone. But, I can make things better for someone, somewhere, for some time. And that’s enough. That has to be enough.”

We sat in silence for a long time. Two eternal beings reflecting on the losses we’d known, the futility of it all, and the weight of making something of your life when your life stretches on into infinity. He finally looked at me.

“You’re really something.”

I laughed. “Says the actual devil.”

“Yeah. That’s me. Worst of the worst, most evil being in all of creation, he who damned humanity.”

“Are you always so full of self loathing?” He shrugged. “Look, I’ve said I’ll be there for Charlie, and I will. However, I’m not her mother. The way the tabloids tell it, Lilith is long gone and probably not coming back. You’re all she has. So, if you’ll indulge me in tearing you a new asshole one more time: get the fuck over yourself and show up for your kid.”

“Get over myself? You think I’m staying away for me? You don’t get it. I love Charlie. She’s my everything. I don’t want to weigh her down with my bullshit. I don’t want to destroy her the way I destroyed my marriage, the way I destroyed the world, the way I destroy…everything.”

“See, this is what I mean. You give yourself too much credit. I don’t know what happened between you and Lilith, but I know humanity. Before I became a winner, I was one of those humans you supposedly damned. And, yeah. Humanity does horrible things. I remember war and rape and greed and, just, evil. But, I also remember kindness and sacrifice and so many good things I saw in spades on Earth but rarely, if ever, in Heaven. Because God just wants blind devotion and loyalty. That’s why he honored me. I’m the whole Biblical poster girl for loyalty I guess. So, I can say with authority that blind loyalty means nothing. Without free will, how can anyone choose who to be loyal to? Without what you did, how could any of us have been free to do good as well as bad? Have you ever considered that your actions were a good thing? Have you ever considered that you allowed us to be free instead of brainless, God loving drones?”

His eyes flashed red. “You’re playing with fire talking about my father like that. You really need to be more careful with what you say.”

“You’re defending him?”

“No! I’m just saying to be careful. He’s smited people for less.”

I smiled. “He can’t reach me here. That’s the whole point of hell, right? Complete separation from anything divine. I love it here.”

“You’re crazy.”

I shrugged. “Maybe. Look, Charlie doesn’t need perfect. She just needs you.”

He shook his head, collapsing into himself in shame. A distant part of me remembered he should be the sin of pride, yet all he embodied was shame. The dissonance felt eerie. I wondered how long he’d been like this. “I can’t.”

He sounded so broken. My heart twinged. He loved his daughter. I felt that. I also felt good from him. An angel who’d wanted to create good, who’d been trying to serve his father, and who’d been endlessly punished as if he’d had the vilest of intentions. Lucifer wasn’t evil. He wasn’t ethereal either. He was a good, but broken, man. So simple and almost human, in a strange way. I reached across the table to take his hand. He jolted but let me take it.

“You can. One step at a time. I’ll help you.”

“Why?”

“It’s what I do.”

“I thought your schtick was helping women? Hate to break it to you, but I’ve got an appendage that makes it really clear I’m not a lady.”

I huffed out a laugh, flashing him a little smile. “Maybe it’s time I branched out. Okay?”

He stared at me for a long moment, then nodded resolutely. “Okay. Let’s fucking do this.”

So, the partnership between Ruth, the Angel of Hell, and Lucifer, the King of the Damned, began. 

Chapter Text

An Apple a Day

"Beware of your friends; do not trust anyone in your clan. For every one of them is a deceiver, and every friend a slanderer.”

Jeremiah 9:4

TW: Mentions of domestic violence and C-PTSD. 

The dreams are never graphic. I don’t relive the worst of my life. I don’t see him. I just feel him. His presence. His stare. The certainty that he is coming home soon and stomach dropping dread. In the dream, I go about my life. I see shadows of my village in my mortal life. The dream shifts to my home in heaven. I’m wandering through the halls. There’s things to do, but I can’t remember what. He’s coming home. I haven’t done what I should’ve done. I haven’t been perfect. I can’t fix it. I can’t remember what I need to fix. I’m a failure. I’m a fuck up. I’m-

My body lurches awake. It’s always the same. I’m clutching my pillow in a death grip, biting it to suppress a scream, and a few cold tears drip down my cheeks. I’m terrified. At first, I don’t know where or, more importantly, when I am. I’ve learned tools to cope with moments like these. I breathe deep. My fingers uncurl from the pillow. I flip to my back and examine the ceiling first. It’s solid white, not sticks and clay. I’m not in my village. The room I’m in has red walls. I’m alone in my bed. I’m at the Hazbin Hotel, in the present, and that means I’m safe. My mind knows this now, but my body will take time. 

It always takes time. No matter how hard I’ve fought to leave the past behind me, the past simmers under my skin, an ingrained part of me. My trauma is a time machine, fragmenting myself across the span of my centuries of living, always bringing shards of all the nights I’ve known to the forefront of my consciousness. I sit up with a huff. My heart continues to race despite my deep breaths. 

You’re safe. You’re safe, goddammit, I tell myself over and over. I know it won’t help. At times like this, all I can do is run. 

I dress quickly in black sweatpants, a black hoodie with slits cut in the back for my wings, and tennis shoes. I open the window, feel the night breeze chill my drying tears, and leap into the abyss. 

My wings spread, and I take flight. The glow from heaven in the distance illuminates my figure as I soar high above my new home. I push myself to fly higher, harder, until I’m gasping. Yet, I still don’t stop. I fly to the limits of Pentagram city and back again. I fly so high the air becomes dangerously thin, then dive towards the barren forests I once slept in, then somersault up again. Only when I begin to feel faint from exhaustion do I turn back towards the hotel, dropping myself on the mast of a ship that crashed into the upper quadrant of the building. I catch my breath. I’ve worked the fear out of my body. I’m okay. 

More than okay. You’ve survived. You’re free.

“Ruth?” I jumped at Lucifer’s voice. “Easy. Mind if I sit?” He’d flown over and now hovered in the air, all six glorious wings beating with a slow tempo.

I scooted over. He joined me. “I thought you said you weren’t ready to move into the hotel yet.”

That had been my first pitch in my pursuit to help him and Charlie reconnect, but Lucifer had panicked. We’d settled on him trying to call her and schedule a time to get coffee before he teleported me home.

“Yeah,” he rubbed the back of his neck, “still not ready for that.”

“Then, why-”

“I put the hotel under surveillance.” He blushed. “Even if I’m not ready to be here yet, I wanted to be sure I knew if anyone tried to attack it or if just anything weird happened. I was told someone was seen jumping from a window then flying into the night at an ungodly hour of the morning. I thought maybe you needed help. I was going to ask, but you seemed like you needed space to work stuff out. So, I gave you space.”

“You’ve been watching me? All this time?”

He cringed. “Okay, I know I sound like a freaky stalker, but I wasn’t sleeping either and, like I said, you seemed, well, not okay. So, I wanted to make sure you got back here safe and, you know, were okay. Are you, by the way?” The truth, again. Who'd have thought the ultimate devil would be so honest? 

“I am now. Go back, though. Why weren’t you sleeping?”

He shook his head. “No, no, don’t change the subject. Come on, what’s got you so upset? We’re friends now, I think. Right? You can talk to me.”

I smiled. “We are friends, but I’m not giving in that easily. You first.”

He groaned. “Stubborn woman. Alright. It’s not that interesting though. I just don’t sleep much. Never have. Can’t get my brain to shut off. It’s always thinking three things at once plus some commercial jingle is in the background on repeat. Who can you trust, who should view? Watch Vox TV or he’s coming for you! Such a fucking stupid tune.”

I laughed. “Better than the ads for Valentino Studios at least.”

“Alright, your turn.”

My head dropped. “Just a bad dream.”

“Uh huh. You have bad dreams like that often?”

“Not as much as I used to.” 

He hummed. “How long were you with him?”

“Centuries.”

Lucifer’s body went stiff. “Come again?”

“Centuries. I was born only a few generations after his death. I stayed with him up until last century when I chose to fall.”

He looked sick. “Lilith only lived with him a few years before she ran away with me. Eve only until she died and came down here. That was enough though. They were both…well, they were really different from each other, but they weren’t, you know, okay. Not at first, not for a while. Centuries with him…how are you so okay? I mean, you’ve been helping me and tons of other sinners. How are you not broken?”

The same thought haunted me some nights. “I haven’t had the option to break. It became apparent fast that no one in heaven would do anything about him. In fact, they’d punish me for bringing awareness to his behavior far sooner than they’d consider punishing him for his behavior. So, I knew I had to accept my lot in eternity. Angels can’t die, after all. So, I did my best to keep myself sane. Sometimes I figured I deserved it. Easier to believe that than to believe the universe is as cruel as it is. But, eventually I did break. I ran, jumped, and then I was here. And here, well, I still don’t have the option to fall apart. Plenty of demons would love to get a chance to try to kill an angel.” The weight of it all fell on me as my body sagged. “I can’t stop. I can’t break, Lucifer. If I let myself stop, let myself really think, let myself really cry, I don’t think I’ll ever stop. I can’t do that. I don’t want to do that. I’ve worked too hard to be free. I’ve got too many other women relying on me. He doesn’t get to break me. He can hurt my body, he can twist my mind, but he doesn’t get to ruin me. I won’t let him.”

Lucifer’s hand touched mine, but I yanked it away. The last thing I wanted was touch from anyone. My body was mine. It needed to be mine at this moment. Thankfully, he pulled away with grace and didn’t mention it.

“He won’t break you,” he said at last. “I was there when my father created him. I know what humans are supposed to be made of. You’re stronger than I ever thought a human could become. And he, well, he’s just a sick prick who’s been coddled his whole immortal life.” I snorted. “Oh, yeah. Did you know he cried like a bitch the first time Lilith told him no? He wanted her to go on a walk with him or something and she said she was tired, and I swear he lost his mind. Blubbering all about how she didn’t really love him. He acts all tough and beats his wives to hide what a baby he is.”

I laughed again. “Thanks, I needed that.”

“Anytime. Look, it’s morning.”

Lucifer was right. The sky had faded from deep maroon to dusty red. Below us, a few sinners began to venture out into the streets, ignorant to the pains of two fallen angels. 

“It is. Sometimes I come here even without a nightmare. It’s nice to watch the city, to know life goes on no matter what’s happening with me. Life goes on, you know?”

He nodded. “I guess. I’ll have to try that sometime.”

“Well, if you want to get out of your head, there’s no better practice than breakfast with us hotel dwellers. Trust me, Angel makes it very hard to focus on anything but him.”

“Angel?”

“You’ve got to meet him. Come on. You were supposed to text Charlie to schedule a coffee anyway, and I’ll bet a thousand hell dollars you didn’t. So, here’s your chance to get that coffee.”

His eyes went wide. “What! I did too!”

“I’m so glad to hear that. I’m sure Charlie will be gushing with excitement about where you’ll be meeting and-”

He groaned. “Okay, okay. You caught me. But, I’m not dressed for breakfast! And it’s rude to impose! Yeah, so rude. Don’t want to be rude.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You can magically change into whatever you want, and Charlie won’t care. If anything, she should probably be less inviting of everyone, including random strangers she finds while driving around hell by the way, but she really won’t mind her father of all beings coming for breakfast.”

“What’s this about her driving around picking up strangers?”

I shook my head. “Come on. I’ve got to get things cooking. That’s my job here, by the way. Head chef.”

His eyes lit up. “Really? Have you ever made apple pancakes? They’re my specialty. Charlie loves ‘em.”

“Well, you’d better teach me then.” 

I prepared to leap down, but Lucifer stopped me. “Do me a favor and picture the kitchen in your mind. Clear as you can.” I did so, and Lucifer waved a hand. A golden portal appeared. We stepped through into the kitchen. I noticed as we passed our clothes changed. My ratty pajamas became a butter yellow swing dress while his wrinkled suit became pressed and covered by a black apron embellished with the words Kiss the Cook. 

“Show off.”

“I am the sin of Pride,” he winked. Then, with another flourish, an abundance of ingredients appeared before us. “Now, let’s get cookin’.”

Later, I’d realize that I lost myself when cooking with Lucifer. I wasn’t afraid. I wasn’t thinking ten steps ahead, body on high alert, always ready for the next threat. With Lucifer, I was just Ruth. With Lucifer, things were just easy. Fun. 

The pancakes smelled delicious. I couldn’t wait to try them. Beyond the kitchen walls, I heard the tell tale sounds of the hotel’s residents gathering at the table. While no one was required to eat communally, everyone seemed to wander to the dining table at 7 am, 11 am, and 11 pm for dinner. The last meal came so late due to Angel’s schedule. As much as everyone claimed to hate each other, they all managed to find ways to avoid being alone. Even Alastor lurked in the corners in the common area or up on the balcony to watch. He’d swear he wasn’t a part of the group, he was scouting for weaknesses, but I knew him better than that. Regardless of origin, power, or circumstance, the one thing to unite us all was our feelings of loneliness. 

“So, uh, does Charlie know about us? Not that there’s an us. That sounded weird. Just, that we’re friends, you know? Did you tell her how we met? Please tell me she doesn’t know I almost broke your neck. I’m so stupid. I thought she was in danger and just panicked. So, so sorry about that again.”

“It’s fine, Lucifer. I already forgave you. You thought I was hurting Charlie. She doesn’t know. Actually, she doesn’t know about me either. What I am. No one does except Alastor. And I’d like to keep it that way.”

He frowned. “That weak disguise actually works on her?”

I nodded. “I think she’s just naturally trusting, so she doesn't look too closely. If she really examined it, I’m not sure if it would hold with the seraphim magic in her veins.”

“Alright. Well, how do we explain our acquaintance?”

I sighed. “We tell her the truth. I violated her privacy by taking her phone, brazenly called you, and you came. Then, we talked and you offered to come help me make breakfast.”

“You sure?”

I nodded. “I should’ve already told her. I owe her an apology.” I poked my head out and saw everyone gathered. “Uh, Charlie? Can you come here for a second?”

She nodded and came in, looking concerned. “Ruth, is everything o-DAD!” She looked between the two of us in shock. Lucifer tittered awkwardly.

“Heyyy, apple pie,” He hugged her tight. “So good to see you! Been too long!”

“You just saw me at the meeting? I mean, we didn’t talk much, but-”

“Yeah, sorry about that, sweetie. You know me, always have kingly…stuff to do.” I kicked his shin. “But never too busy for you, of course! That’s why I’m here. I wanted to make you breakfast. Apple pancakes, your favorite!” 

“Oh,” Charlie said, leaning into the hug. “That means a lot, dad. I’ve missed you.”

Lucifer blinked back tears. “You have?”

“Of course! You’re my dad. But I don’t want to bother you. I know you’ve got a lot to do, and I’m, kinda, a failure.”

Lucifer pulled back and stared at Charlie in shock. “Why would you say that? You’re not a failure. Never think you’re a failure. Why do you think you’re a failure?”

Charlie’s eyes filled with tears again. Her bottom lip wobbled. I felt a wave of emotions from Charlie. Disgust. Shame. Hate. All for herself. She truly believed she was a failure. How had I missed it? Charlie gave so much to others, worked so hard, to run from her own self-loathing. The same way I’m always running to keep the memories away.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to make hell better, but nothing ever works. I tried the self-help clinics, and the rehab, and the musical theatre healing program, and it all just didn’t work. And I know you want me to be strong and tough like you, but I’m just not.”

“Why do you think that? I’m not strong. Hell, you’re so much stronger than me. You’re like your mother: a natural ruler. And even if you weren’t, I’d still love you. I do love you, Charlie. For who you are. Always have. I’ve always been proud of you.”

Charlie's eyes flashed red for a millisecond. “Then why haven’t you supported me? You never came to any of the opening days for my projects. You’ve never helped or called or even asked about what I’m doing.”

I saw Lucifer start to panic. I put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a look. Don’t you dare back away now. Be there. Be the father you want to be. 

“Y-you’re right. I’ve been a shit father to you, Charlie. I’m sorry. I should’ve been there. I didn’t know my absence made you feel this way. Fuck, I never want you to feel this way. You’re my everything, my reason for existing, for trying to make this shithole somewhat habitable. Everything I do is for you.”

“I’m your everything? You didn’t even want me!” Charlie yelled in a sudden rage.

We all paused in shock. Lucifer spluttered, “W-what?”

“Mom told me what you said. How I was too much work and an embarrassment to your legacy. How you didn’t want me to stay with you when you guys split.”

Lucifer’s eyes went red. “She said what? ”

Charlie hesitated. Lucifer’s breathing went ragged with rage. He ran a hand through his hair, pulling out some strands. “I NEVER said that. EVER. I always wanted to spend time with you, but Lilith said girls needed their mothers. She said I was a shit king and father and you didn’t want to stay with me. I thought you wanted to go with her. As you got older and spent less time with me, I thought she was right. That I was hurting you, ruining you, like I ruin fucking everything.”

Charlie began crying again. “But mom she wouldn’t- why would she- how do I know you’re telling the truth?”

I stepped forward. “He is. I have the ability to know if someone is lying. Alastor knows. You can ask him if you don’t believe me. He isn’t lying.”

They both broke. Lucifer and Charlie fell together, crying yet also relieving years of misunderstanding and rejection. Apparently, all because of Lilith. Lucifer caught my eyes over Charlie’s shoulder. I knew mine reflected the same sentiment: that bitch was going to get what was coming to her. Who knew what other lies she’d told Charlie? Who knew how much of Charlie’s self hate came from her own mother? 

Chapter Text

The Gore of Growth

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”

Jeremiah 17:9

TW: Mentions of domestic violence, self harm, and FND (description of FND symptoms could also remind readers of panic attack symptoms)

Lucifer made good on his promise to me and took Charlie for coffee. They blinked away, leaving me with platters of pancakes and a dining room of oblivious hotel guests. I took a breath, gathered up the grub, and stepped out. 

“Uh, Ruth? Where’s Charlie?” 

“She went to coffee with her dad.”

The air crackled with the faintest hint of static as Alastor squinted at me. 

“Wait, really?” Vaggie said. “Lucifer called her? Just out of the blue?”

“He came here, actually. They just teleported away. I’m sure Charlie will fill you in as soon as she gets back.”

“So, hell’s head honcho came by, and you didn’t tell me? I thought we was friends, bitch. What was he like?” Angel asked.

“I bet he’s scary,” Nifty giggled. 

My lips titled in a smile as I remembered cooking with him. “No, he’s…nice.”

Angel slammed his paws on the table. “Oh. My. GAWD. You’re blushin’. Look at her! I bet you’re thinking about how he’s gotta have a nice, big-”

“I am not!” I said. A hand reflexively moved to my warm cheek. “He’s Charlie’s dad, Angel. Don’t make it weird.”

“I don’t slut shame, babe,” he winked. “Own that daddy kink.”

“I do not- never mind. Eat, you brutes.” 

Breakfast devolved into the usual table antics, though Vaggie and Alastor were uncharacteristically quiet. Vaggie glanced at her phone every now and again, waiting for word from Charlie. Alastor stared at me. As everyone scattered, he stayed back, as expected.

“Let me clean up. Then, we’ll talk.” 

Alastor snapped his fingers, and the dishes flew themselves into the kitchen where the sound of scrubbing soon followed. I glared at him. 

“You could do that this whole time?”

“Come, dear. I believe we have much to discuss.”

We moved to his room. Alastor and I were friends, but his stare brought the full weight of our deal’s chain down on my neck. I lifted my head in defiance. We’d made a deal, yes, but he didn’t own me the same way he owned his souls. He’d do well to remember that. He tapped his clawed fingers against his staff, that steady smile fixed on me. A battle of wills stretched taut between us. Anxiety churned in my gut, weakening my bravado.

“He’d put the hotel under surveillance. He caught me going out for one of my evening flights and checked on me. We talked. I convinced him to come see Charlie.”

He stalked closer. A thick, glowing contract appeared in his hand. He flipped through until he paused at a line. “In exchange for protection and services outlined previously from the patron to the client, the client will act in good faith to provide their agreed upon services to the patron. Good faith is defined as supporting the well-being and goals of the patron to the best of her ability through her words, actions, and allegiances.”

“Have I failed to do that?”

The room darkened as his eyes glowed neon green. “You just lied to me.”

I stiffened. “I did not tell a lie.”

“Oh, don’t play coy. I know your cunning, Ruth. Thus, I’m not going to let you claim a lie by omission isn’t a lie.”

I frowned in confusion before I understood. “I don’t have to tell you everything I do. You could’ve asked about him portalling me as soon as I came back that evening. You also could have refrained from putting me under surveillance.”

“You, too, could have told me about your time with the king of hell. Then, or now. But you didn’t. I wonder why. Last you saw each other he tried to kill you. Now, you seem to be quite close. Quite secretive. I’m not sure this allegiance you’re making serves my interests.”

I tried to feel his emotions, but he’d put up a firm wall. 

“Alastor,” I said, “I haven’t betrayed you. I didn’t give Lucifer any information he could use against you.”

“Did you tell him about our deal?”

I hung my head. “I told him I’ve made an alliance with some overlords where I use my discernment abilities to aid them in exchange for fairer deals for women in need. I didn’t think he could use that information to work against you. He just wants what’s best for Charlie.” 

What do you want with her?  

“You’re right,” he hissed. “You didn’t think. Your association with him ends now. His presence can only complicate matters.”

A chill came over me. “Turn to the clause about Lucifer and Lilith.”

He frowned but did so. The chill thawed as we read the words on the page: Patron shall make no demands regarding interactions with Lucifer or Lilith Morningstar or in any way knowingly perpetuate circumstances where client shall have to interact with, use her abilities on, or oppose Lucifer or Lilith Morningstar. 

Funny how I’d been terrified of catching the rulers’ ire back then. Now, that fear driven wording protected my friendship with the devil.

“You can’t stop me from associating with him.”

The contract vanished. Black tendrils swam behind Alastor as his demonic form came forth. 

“Those who play with fire risk getting burned.” 

I stood firm, lilting my head up to meet his glowing eyes. “Maybe. But you won’t be the one to burn me. We have a deal. Neither of us can hurt the other. Nor do I want to hurt you. We’ve worked together for a century. We’ve been friends about as long. You can trust me.” 

Radio static thickened the air as he absorbed my words. His stitched smile wobbled before setting again. The tentacles faded. The light returned to the room as he returned to normal. 

“Yes,” he said genially, “it would be quite uncivilized for friends to hurt each other, wouldn’t it? That conduct is reserved for enemies. Speaking of which, I’ll need to be getting to the tailor. While you were out with your other friend, an old enemy dropped by to try to kill me. He failed, of course, but not before tearing my suit jacket.”

I blinked. “Really?”

“The princess wanted me to show restraint.”

“That sounds like Charlie.” I tittered awkwardly, unsure of what to do now.

“Go on, my friend. I’ll see you this evening,” he said.

I wasted no time leaving. I retreated to my room, where I collapsed onto the bed and gasped for air. I’d never show Alastor how much he terrified me if I could help it, but he did. His demon form held powerful magic, dark and suffocating. Ordinary demons couldn’t hurt me, but a part of me wondered if the strange power he held would be the exception to the rule. Even if not, his presence when he got like that was disturbing. For all his gentlemanly charm, Alastor was a soul I knew had arrived in hell for good reason. This place was built for souls like his; he didn’t see hell as a punishment. No, this was his eternal playground. 

A portal opened. In my heightened state, I jumped back in fear and tried to scream but a hand covered my mouth.

“Sh! Sh! Shhhhiiiiit! It’s fine, you’re fine, we’re fine, it’s me,” Lucifer said. 

I wrenched his hand away. “Can you stop doing that?” I snapped. “Just knock like a normal person!” 

“Sorry,” he said, running a hand through his hair. He looked like a wreck. Hair sticking in all directions. Eyes bloodshot. Leg tapping in a frantic rhythm. 

“How was coffee?” 

He jumped up and began to pace. “Good! So good. I mean, it was a lot. We talked a lot. Or, not much at all. We were both just emotional. But it was good. We connected. She said she really wants to be close to me again. Amazing, right? But, turns out a big reason we fell apart was my Lily. My wife. She said all these things to our daughter and then left and I just…Charlie wanted to process, I think, with Vaggie. She doesn’t know I’m here. I tried to go back to the palace, but I can’t be alone right now. And I came here. I shouldn’t be here. I’m sorry. You’re probably doing something, and I’m imposing, and Charlie really doesn’t need me to be imposing right now as she’s trying to figure stuff out. Fuck. I’m such a stupid, clingy piece of shit.”

“Hey,” I said softly, “don’t talk about yourself that way. It’s okay. A heads up would be nice in the future, but it’s okay to ask for support from  a friend right now. I’m here.” I could see him fight back tears. “Want to go for a fly? Always helps me clear my head.”

He nodded. “Yeah. That sounds nice.” 

I opened the window, perched on the ledge, and shot him a half-smile. Then, I fell out. The ground raced towards me. Adrenaline surged but I held out until the last moment before unfurling my wings and swooping back into the maroon sky. The shadow of Lucifer’s six wings shaded me from above. He darted ahead of me, expression fixed on a point in the distance. 

We flew to the edges of Pentagram City and back before Lucifer gestured for me to follow him. We soared higher into the air, so high the landscapes below looked like a patchwork quilt. Imp City came into view. I knew about it, of course, but had never ventured there. While sinners could travel to Imp City, they were discouraged from living there. This city made space for the hellborn, a space they needed. The hellborn, like the heavenborn I’d known from before, were often more removed from the discourse about good and evil, sinner or winner. After all, their fates were determined by birth. Hellborn would never have the chance to ascend to heaven, nor could heavenborn fall to hell after death. They had one chance at life with no afterlife to continue their existence. So, they lived to the fullest. Worked, fell in love, and had families. 

 Lucifer and I descended to sit atop a tall, dome shaped observatory and observed the city in silence. The hellborn, still creatures of hell, engaged in sins as the sinners of Pride City did, though they seemed less sadistic about it. An older imp shuffled across the street and yelled curses at a van that raced by her. A few young imps tussled in an ally before coming apart, laughing. A couple ended a hot and heavy public make out session before walking on hand in hand, leaning into each other. 

“Why?” Lucifer whispered. “Why would Lily tell Charlie those things? She wanted her. I’ll admit, at first, I didn’t. I never thought about having a child. Didn’t think it’d be possible if I’m being honest, and hell isn't exactly an ideal place for a kid. But we were struggling. Lily…we grew apart. Looking back, we’d grown apart for thousands of years. She was trying to make the best of things down here, and I couldn’t accept it. She suggested we try for a baby, you know? It made sense. An heir would allow us, well her, to step back from ruling without risking losing our influence. And she said it’d bring us back together. It’d help fix our marriage. I could create something good again.” He shook his head. “I’ll never forget when we figured out I was pregnant.”

“Wait, you were the one who carried her?”

He nodded. “Sinners can’t procreate. Even my magic couldn’t overpower my father's decree. But my want for a child seemed to bring her into being in me, I guess? That’s why Charlie looks like me, but not her mother. She’s born solely of my magic. Another creation of mine, the sum of all my hopes, dreams, and desires. My greatest creation.”

I absorbed this information. It made sense. Charlie did look like Lucifer and not Lilith. It also explained so much about who she was. Idealistic. Passionate. Kind. Sensitive. Somehow able to remain pure despite her constant exposure to hell’s cruelties. She embodied all heaven should stand for. 

“Yeah,” I said softly. “She is.”

He smiled at me before his face fell again. “Maybe that’s why. Lilith hated me in the end. She said I’d ruined her life, damned her here, and ruined hell too. She said I ruined everything I created. But how could she…?”

“She sounds like a narcissist,” I said. “It’s all about her ego. Her desires. It’s funny. Both of God’s first creations seem to be raging narcissists. Made in his image, huh?”

Lucifer stiffened, as he always did when I spoke callously about his father. “I never thought about it like that. Shit.”

“Luci?”

“Yeah?”

“I told you a little about my time with Adam. You know he treated me poorly. Humans eventually made a word for when one spouse abuses another: domestic violence. Do you think, maybe, Lilith was abusive to you, too?”

He jerked up. “No! No, no, no. I mean, yeah, Lilith could be a bitch. And what she said to Charlie is super not okay. Like, if she ever comes back, I don’t even know what I’d say to her about how she treated our daughter. But, she didn’t abuse me. How could she? I’m a seraphim. I’m the ruler of hell, one of the most powerful beings ever created. There’s nothing she could say to me that could hurt me. I mean, everything she said was right. I did damn her to hell and hell is, well, a fucking mess. I damned all of humanity for fuck’s sake. I’m the biggest fuck up in all of existence.”

I grabbed his hand. He jerked his gaze back to me. “Did you force Lilith to leave Adam and marry you?”

“No!” He said. “Of course not!”

“Okay. Did you force Lilith to help you offer Eve the apple?”

“Well, no.”

“So, how could you have damned her? She is a grown woman who made choices and lived with the consequences of those choices.”

He balked at me. “Yes. I guess. But I still should have known better. I should have listened to my father and left that apple alone.”

“Yes, but you were young for a seraphim when you did that, right?” He nodded. “Did you know what the apple would do? Did you intend to cause harm?” He shook his head. “If it were Charlie who did what you did and you were the one who’d made the apple, how would you respond?”

He paled, looking almost sick, as if thought about it. He wobbled, and I pulled him to sit. His body began to quiver. Was he having a panic attack? A seizure? He flopped down onto his back, limbs shaking. I panicked, grabbing his shoulder while moving to kneel over him. “Lucifer? Lucifer! I’m sorry. That was too much. Come back. You’re safe. Charlie’s safe. It’s okay.”

He couldn’t hear me. His eyes went glassy with tears. He adopted a glazed stare I knew too well. How often had I worn that same, distant look? I couldn't even sense emotions coming from him. Instead, all I felt the cold wave of dissociation caused by feelings too large to comprehend or process. I'd pushed him over the edge. Self hate threatened to tear me apart, but I shoved it down. I’d punish myself for my idiocy later. Right now, my friend needed me. 

Hell didn’t really have ethical therapists, and I’d been cut off from a lot of support in heaven since seeking help would signal to others how Adam treated me. I could access books, however. Humans and winners wrote a lot about coping with trauma and overcoming a disorder long term trauma sometimes caused that they called Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. One strategy they suggested I’d found fruitful was called grounding. 

“Lucifer, I need you to find something you can see. I see the sky. I see three clouds. I see our moon.” The shaking softened, just a bit. “What can you hear? I hear cars honking. I hear people talking. I hear the wind. What about smell?” I sniffed then swallowed a gag at the familiar scent of garbage and carnage. “Never mind. Forget about smell and taste. Focus on what you feel. I feel the metal beneath me.” I took his hand. “I feel your hand in mine. You’re safe. You’re in Imp City with your friend, Ruth.” 

It took time, but he began to come back. He looked exhausted and so lost. My heart broke. “Are you okay?”

He gulped. His words came out slow. “Yeah. I don’t know what that was. I’m sorry you had to see that.”

“No! I’m sorry. I pushed too hard.”

He sat up and fiddled with his suit jacket. “I should probably be getting back to the palace. Thanks for the flight, Ruth.” 

He opened a portal. On the other side, I saw my bedroom. 

“Oh. Right. If you need…well…just take care of yourself. Please.”

He nodded but wouldn’t meet my eyes. My heart broke. I stepped through the portal, and it shut behind me. I collapsed onto the ground, sobbing as my self-loathing hit full force. I dug my nails into my arm hard enough to break the skin.

“You stupid fucking bitch,” I cursed to myself. 

Adam was right about me. I was stupid, lazy, and selfish. I hurt my friends. Alastor. Lucifer. Charlie. My loyalty poisoned those cursed to hold my affection. A familiar darkness slithered under my skin. I should run. Pack up my things and disappear back to the woods where I could hurt no one, and no one could hurt me. Yes, that was the best course of action. Or, it would be, if my deal with Alastor didn’t keep me here. Lost in my grief, I missed knocking on my door. Suddenly, Angel barged in.

“Bitch, you won’t believe it. That snake fucker who tried to kill us six hours ago dragged his sorry ass back, and Charlie- woah. Are you okay?”

I tried to pull it together. I tried to be the mask of strength I knew I needed to be. I collapsed into sobs as Angel shut the door and joined me on the floor. 

“Hey,” he said, softer than I’d ever heard him. “I’m here. Tell me what’s the matter, honey.”

Chapter Text

Dead Angels and Other Improbabilities

“Slaves, in reverent fear of God submit yourselves to your masters, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh.”

1 Peter 2:18

“And THEN he said I’m not near as sexy as I think I am. Can you BELIEVE him?”

Hours later, deep into the night, empty wine bottles scattered about as Angel and I dished. I’d tried to protect Lucifer’s privacy when I broke down with my new friend; though, I still feared I’d shared too much. At the moment, I was too inebriated to care. 

Angel gave surprisingly good advice (“I spend all day naked, toots, ya think I ain’t good with vulnerability and all that shit?”) before declaring that we needed wine. Maybe we did, maybe we didn’t, but Beezelbub’s special blend definitely loosened us up. Which led to Angel’s current rant about Husk. 

“I mean,” Angel slurred while sloshing the golden liquid in his glass, “everyone in hell wants some of this ass. We all know it. But he’s not gonna admit it? Fucking prick.”

I snorted. “Everyone, huh?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Hey, only reason you’re not trying to feel me up is you’ve got the King of Hell all goo-goo for ya. I’m a prince, but I ain’t no king.”

“AGAIN we are just friends. He’s in love with Lilith.”

“Yeah, the ex who lied to Charlie all about ‘im. Whatever he felt for that succubitch is long gone after that bomb dropped, babe. Trust me. He may not have figured it out yet, but from what ya told me when he’s thinking about his queen, it ain’t her he’s thinking about. Not anymore.”

“Right,” I said, eager to deflect. “Just like how when you think about Husk you go all heart eyed- OW!” I rubbed my upper arm after he swatted me with his paw. 

“I do not go heart eyed! He’s so fucking annoying.” Lie. He'll come to terms with his crush eventually. 

“Enemies to lovers is such a thing for a reason, sweetie.”

Angel waved me off. “Whatever. We’re outta the good stuff. I’ll be back.”

“Say hi to Husk for me.”

“Fuck you!”

I laid back after he left and caught my breath. Angel didn’t know what he was talking about. Lucifer and I were just friends. There wasn’t anything romantic blossoming. Really? My subconscious taunted. Flashes of our time together swam in my mind. Him checking on me after that rough night. Laughing together when he got too excited while making pancakes and spilled batter everywhere. Him opening up to me, and I to him. That ease I felt when talking to him. My heart twisted. Would I ever feel that ease again? Had I ruined everything? Why did the thought of not seeing him anymore hurt so much? 

He was a deadbeat dad to Charlie, I reminded myself. 

He was drowning, but he admitted his wrongdoings and took action to correct them when he realized how his depression was hurting her. Another part of my brain argued back. 

He tried to kill you without hesitation. He’s visibly depressed and anxious. He’s let his issues cripple his ability to rule Hell. My brain replied. 

He’s flawed. Like you. Like everyone else at the hotel. He’s kind and passionate and creative. He’s been through too much. How stable would you be after an eternity of being the universe’s scapegoat and having your only companion abandon you after emotionally abusing you and your daughter? 

My thoughts were interrupted by several loud thumps and shouting from the floor below. I jumped up, cursing Angel under my breath. However, when I arrived I quickly saw Angel hadn’t been the instigator of the latest hotel drama. Vaggie and Charlie arrived seconds after me to see Angel and Sir Pentious scuffling. A Vox tech surveillance camera rested among the books, clear evidence that Angel’s accusation that our newest resident had been sent as a spy from the Vees was accurate. The snake scrambled to call Vox and begged him to save him. I gritted my teeth. 

In the past century I’d seen the Vees come into power and develop a monopoly on Hell in Alastor’s absence. Their rise to power hadn’t been pretty. Alastor at least had a moral code, albeit a fucked up one. These three, though, appeared to have no guardrails to suppress their greed and were quite willing to indulge in mass sadism and cruelty to achieve their ends. While Valentino was the most sickening with his unchecked sex slavery and abuse, Velvette and Vox were not to be underestimated. Both could be just as cruel when they desired to be.

Vox laughed through the communicator. “I can’t believe you got caught. It hasn’t even been a day! I can’t believe we thought you could even handle something this simple. You know what? Do us a favor. If they don’t kill you, go ahead and do it yourself you miserable failure”

My heart squeezed when Sir Pentious began to sniffle. He did his best to cover his emotions, but we all could see how upset he felt. This couldn’t have been the first time he had to face the potential of being killed. I’d heard it hurt, but it wouldn’t be permanent. Eventually, the sinners reformed so long as they hadn’t been struck by angelic power. I guessed the tears were more related to Vox’s humiliation and rejection. Hell was brutal. The average lowly sinner took beating after beating. The only way to survive was to indebt yourself to an overlord and that could hardly be called an ideal way to exist. He just wanted to get through, same as the rest of us. 

Charlie, evidently, saw this too. So, she did the most Charlie thing possible. She began to sing. Soon she had the snake in her clutches as they danced around the library. He apologized, made a pact to join our dysfunctional family, and the only person still harboring a massive grudge was Angel who huffed off to his room.

I returned to mine, relieved to be alone to think. I’d enjoyed the night with Angel and planned to do it again sometime, but now Charlie’s song demanded introspection about my predicament. It starts with sorry… I cared about Lucifer. Angel’s arguments made sense now that I could reflect on them. My own heart spoke louder volumes. Nothing could come of denying the obvious any further. I wouldn’t be so distraught if I didn’t care, and I’d remain this distraught until I knew where I stood with him. While Alastor, Rosie, and Carmilla could be counted as friends, Lucifer understood me on a level none of my other associates could. They hadn’t lived long enough yet. 

They hadn’t yet endured the burdens and joys of such a long existence. They hadn’t yet faced the reality that the best said long existence could offer, Heaven, was not much of a paradise at all. They hadn’t yet had to reckon with that reality, and, if the exterminators had it their way, they never would. What is eternity without hope? How does one live when they cannot die and are stuck surrounded by endless suffering? Why carry on when the omniscient creator of you, of everything, allows you to suffer endlessly and demands you thank him for it? I didn’t know. He didn’t either. But at least we were asking the same questions. 

I pulled out my phone and opened up my most recent contact addition: Luci. 

Hey…Are you okay? I shook my head and deleted the words. Sorry I… I emptied the text box again. 

“How do I do this?” I muttered to myself. 

The gap between us felt too wide for a simple message to transcend. We were so alike yet it felt too intimidating to reach out to him. I’d made friends, sure, but those friendships were transactional. There were rules to them. Literal contracts. This created space between us and that space made me feel safe. Reaching out to Lucifer felt different. We had no contract. No rules. Just us. It was too much.

I put my phone away, flopping onto my bed. I hugged a pillow close. Closed my eyes. Sleep would do me good. I had my role in hell helping women. I had my abilities, my allies, and my grimoire to hide myself from the man of my nightmares. I didn’t need anything more. Right?

***

Sir Pentious shook up the hotel immediately. His egg minions were always underfoot causing mischief. Five days of chaos passed before Vaggie lost her patience. She stood beside Charlie who hung a banner celebrating the snake demon’s first week with us in the parlor. Charlie attempted to reassure her girlfriend that Sir Pentious’s nefarious were behind him when he came strolling up with a giant cannon-like contraption.

“What the hell is that?!” Vaggie cried.

I tried to zone out their conversation but couldn’t help but catch the device’s name: the skin flayer 11,000. I sighed and stroked KeeKee, who’d hopped into my lap. The cat demon had been extra snuggly with me as of late. Animals always had a way of sensing my distress despite my best efforts to hide it. It’d been five days since I’d spoken to Lucifer. I’d almost texted him countless times but could never bring myself to press send. 

Was he okay? I pictured him alone in his castle (he’d insisted on calling it a mansion, but the man absolutely had a castle), glass eyed and lost. All because of me. All because I’d pushed too hard, forced myself into his business. The shadows of my past lapped at my mind at all hours. I felt heavy. It was as though every bad thing that happened to me had become a stone stacked beneath my skin, weighing me down. Yet, no one knew I’d been filled with stones inside. I carried on as usual. Perhaps if Sir Pentious and his minions hadn’t been causing such a stir, someone would’ve noticed. As it was, all attention remained on his latest shenanigans. 

“Ruth, you with us?”

Or not. I started at the voice of Odette Carmine. KeeKee leapt off my lap. Her sister, Clara, was there too.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

Clara rolled her eyes. “Did you miss us delivering a huge shipment just now?”

I turned to see a giant cart beside Sir Pentious who was arguing with Vaggie. 

“Oh. Sorry. I was lost in my thoughts.”

Odette raised an eyebrow. “Apparently so. Are you attending the meeting this afternoon?” 

“What meeting?”

Sir Pentious began crying loudly while holding his egg minions. I briefly glanced his way before refocusing on the conversation. 

“Didn’t mom text you? She’s called for an urgent meeting of the overlords.”

I checked my phone and noticed a missed notification from her. I palmed my forehead. This moping had gotten ridiculous. 

“Sorry. I missed it. I’ll be there.” I read the text, brow furrowed. “There’s no meeting agenda listed. Do you know what this is about?”

A wave of apprehension rolled over me. Clara and Odette both schooled their features expertly, but I sensed traces of fear behind the facade. Something major had happened. 

“No,” Odette lied. “I’m sure mom will fill you in.”

“Of course. See you soon.”

As soon as the sisters left, a shadow beckoned me from the stairwell. I huffed but obediently made my way to Alastor’s room, brushing past Vaggie who was just leaving him for some reason. I watched her go, a little curious but not enough to ask, before shutting the door behind me. 

“My shadows told me the dear junior Carmines stopped by to chat.”

I examined a painting on the wall to avoid the gruesome sight of the rotting deer carcass he had decided to eat. 

“You ate breakfast with all of us less than an hour ago.”

“Yes, and then I wanted to enjoy this delectable treat. While I appreciate your efforts to cater to my palette, your meals cannot satisfy my desire to kill and eat my meat fresh.”

“...right. They asked me if I was attending the meeting this afternoon. I assume you’d like me to be there?”

“Of course. Your ability to get a read on a situation is invaluable. Speaking of, don’t be shy. Do tell.”

Guilt simmered in my belly. I hated this part of my deal; I hated that I had to bare people’s intimate emotions to a psychopath intent on exploiting them. 

“They’re scared. They know what the meeting is about. It’s something big, whatever it is.”

He hummed. “Interesting. Today’s meeting should be lively, then.”

I tossed him a little smirk. While my deal with this demon had its downfalls, my fondness for his cheeky antics was real. “That couldn’t be because a certain overlord who’s been absent for nearly a decade will be showing up, right?”

His grin widened. “I’ll admit I look forward to taking the next step in reestablishing my dominance of hell.”

“I don’t doubt it. Shall we meet at the front door half an hour till?”

He nodded. “Indeed. We’ll have some additional company. I’ve been asked to rehome Sir Pentious’s egg-like companions.”

The crying made sense now. “Oh.” I squinted at him. “You’re not going to scramble them right?”

He sighed. “Sadly, I have been forced to agree to a humane rehoming.”

I exhaled in relief. While annoying, they seemed sweet.

Sweet but stupid. A bit later, Alastor and I walked through the streets of hell with the gaggle of eggs around our legs. Demons hid as we approached, though a few snuck pictures for the tabloids. Most believed me to be Alastor’s personal assistant. A few far fetched publications proposed conspiracy theories that I ran some shadow government in hell. One or two got the story correct, but I took steps to suppress these. I’d asked the demons I worked with to keep word of me quiet, only sharing my existence with a soul in need. Too much attention could be disruptive for my work and Alastor’s. 

“I like your suit!”

“Your dress is pretty!”

“What are the antlers for?”

“Are you a minion too?

“Can I touch your staff thing?”

“Why is your skin so gray?

“Are those your ears or is that your hair? I can’t tell!”

I giggled as Alastor’s eye twitched at the bombardment of questions from the eggs. He shot me a glare that turned deadly when a voice came from the shadows.

“Hark, Alastor and Ruth,” A shadow swept in front of us before solidifying into Zestial.

I’d always held mixed feelings for the ancient demon. His age made him a kindred spirit. He’d come to hell not long after I’d gone to Heaven. His intellect allowed him to survive in hell for as long as he had. He could be a cruel overlord, but he always showed a surprising sense of fairness. He ruled with an iron fist, but he also gave those under his thumb clear expectations and the consequences for failing to meet them up front. It was hard to fault an overlord who ruled with honesty. 

Alastor gave a quick threat to the eggs then greeted Zestial. I gave my acknowledgements as well. As usual, I could read nothing but the faintest hints of emotion from him. The demon had long mastered the art of masking his true emotions and intent from any adversaries, empathic abilities or not. 

Alastor and Zestial exchanged small talk about the weather as we continued our trek. I did my best to remain genial but unnoticed. 

“It has been an age since we last saw you,” the demon said to my friend. “Some have spun wild tales of you falling into holy arms?”

I jolted as a wave of shock spilled from Alastor. He slammed up an emotional wall, spine stiff. Gotcha. 

He laughed off the comment. “I just took a well earned sabbatical. Nothing serious. But it’s fun to keep everyone on their toes!”

I narrowed my eyes at him. Liar. What business could he have with someone from heaven? Alastor couldn’t have been working with Adam, right? My heart stopped at the thought. No, he couldn’t. There had to be language in our contract that prevented that? My mind raced but I couldn’t remember any exact words. I forced a deep breath through my nose. I couldn’t panic now. I had to appear strong in front of the overlords. Demanding answers from Alastor would have to wait. 

The two bantered on until we reached Carmilla Carmine’s headquarters in the heart of the Doomsday District. We took an elevator up. I frowned at one egg minion who’d failed to exit before the doors closed. Alastor had wisely instructed the eggs to wait for us outside. This meeting wasn’t for the faint of heart…or fragile shelled. His panicked eyes locked on mine. I motioned for him to lay low. The overlords on either side of me pretended he didn’t exist.

The rest of hell’s overlords poured out of elevators lining a long hall that led to the conference room where we met quarterly. While no one overlord officially ruled over the rest, Carmilla definitely took charge of the administrative business that came from overseeing Pride City. Rosie caught my eye and shot me a razor toothed smile. I returned it, taking a seat to her right. My peripheral vision caught the egg creature hiding beneath the table. Good. I hoped he had the good sense not to draw attention to himself. Many in this room would smash him to pieces just for fun. One group I noticed had not made an appearance were the Vees. I stared at their empty seats, shooting Alastor a questioning glance. His expression gave nothing away. Had his radio show intimidated Vox into missing this meeting? Or were the Vees determined to never collaborate about anything, even to their own detriment?

The sharp clack of Carmilla’s knife pointed ballet slippers echoed off the pale red walls as she took her place at the head of her table. Her daughters trailed behind, ever present shadows to their devoted mother. Her fierce love always warmed my heart. It pulsed with each beat of her heart, a constant in the ever-changing horrors of hell.

“Welcome, hell’s sovereign overlords. I’ve invited you all here because you represent the controlling powers of our city. Together you own millions of souls. Souls at risk with the new extermination schedule. We need to discuss what can be done to minimize the impact to our interests.”

Zestial materialized into a seat near her, a cup of tea in hand. I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes. He’d walked in with us, but like many overlords couldn’t resist a dramatic entrance. Drama queens, the lot of them. 

She greeted him and he replied, “Enchanted as always, Carmilla.” The faintest twinge of an emotion radiated from Zestial. Admiration? Desire? Carmilla’s feelings were clearer, but I couldn’t decide on their meaning. Affection. I’d long suspected the two were closer than friends but could never confirm this. Carmilla would never admit it. Her open love for her daughters already put a huge target on the backs of people she cared for. Overlords did not have the luxury of baring their love, and therefore their weaknesses, openly without cost. 

Her gaze fell on my friend. “Alastor?”

Excitement buzzed from him. Here was his moment to be the center of attention. “Yes, I know. I know I’ve been absent for some time. I’m sure you’ve all been wondering about me.”

I fought back a laugh when Carmilla said, unfazed, “Not really. But welcome back in any case.”

Alastor’s eyes narrowed in irritation. Carmilla didn’t notice. She snapped her fingers and got down to business. A series of graphs showed an increase in permanent deaths across exterminations. My stomach clenched at the clear upward line. Why was Adam doing this? How could he kill more and more sinners each year? Was this my fault?

Breathe, Ruth. You can’t show weakness here. Get it together. I felt my features set themselves into a blank mask. 

“We have assessed that about sixteen percent of the population was lost,” she was saying, “With the exterminators now returning twice as quickly, I think it prudent that we-”

The door slammed open with a bang as a wave of wrath, confidence, and disgust hit me all at once. Velvette. I caught Alastor’s eye, noting how his teeth were on display from the force of his grin. For better or worse, this meeting was about to get a whole lot more entertaining. 

Chapter Text

I Call Them As I See Them

“Let a woman learn by listening quietly and being ready to cooperate in everything.”

1 Timothy 2:11

Velvette threw an angel’s head onto the table. I jerked back hard, so stunned I took a beat to process the feelings of the others. Nearly every overlord felt the same shock I did. Except two. Alastor, whose surprise came with an almost equally strong dose of hunger, and Carmilla, who felt fear. My lips pursed in confusion. Fear? Why?

“Oh! Tasty!” Alastor said, wiggling his eyebrows at me. 

“Where did you get this?” Carmilla asked.

“We found it during Extermination Day,” her younger counterpart replied. “The game has changed. If these Holy rollers can be killed, we can take the fight to them. The boys and I have come up with a full assault plan-”

Zestial, thankfully, cut her off as the voice of reason. The other overlords nodded in agreement with his assessment that rushing into a war with heaven would not be a wise move. At all. They outmatched hell in firepower by a lot. Angels shouldn’t have been able to be killed in hell. Or heaven. Angels weren’t killed. The worst fate I’d heard befalling one was the one I chose: banishment to hell. So, how had this one died and by decapitation no less?

Charlie wasn’t the only one in hell who preferred to express herself in song. Actually, it was common for those experiencing strong emotions to sing it out in both heaven and hell. Carmilla and Velvette were both heated and expressed it by singing at each other. Better than lunging for each other’s throats, I supposed.

As Velvette did her best to tear down the overlords’ established matriarch, I fought to keep my anger off my face. Carmilla could handle herself. Still, the boldness of the Vees didn’t go unnoticed. With each passing year, it became more evident that they aimed to topple the order of hell to give themselves unquestioned dominance. 

Which again begged the question, why did Alastor leave in the first place? He’d kept them- and everyone else to be fair- in line. His departure left a power vacuum everyone’s been killing to claim ever since. The Vees would’ve never gained so much power if he hadn’t given them seven years to build and plan. Who pulled his strings? What did they want? At least he’s back. 

“This meeting’s over!”

I jolted out of my thoughts at my friend’s shout. Her fear now rang strong across the room, but even without my ability I could see something wasn’t right. Carmilla kept her cool, always. She departed right after her declaration, abandoning her guests in an eerily silent conference room. Slowly, we all began to make our way out the door.

“What a productive meeting!” Alastor said jovially after returning Rosie’s farewell. “Ruth, I trust I’ll see you again soon for tea.”

This was one of our codes. I complied with his directive readily. “Of course. I’ll brew that blend you like.”

He bid me goodbye and left me behind. Carmilla and her daughters had disappeared to her office. I knew the way. My debt to Alastor required me to be sympathetic to her for the purpose of extorting information, but I really did want to check on her. 

The door was open a crack. I saw four shadows. Wait…four? 

“The felled angel. Twas by your hand, twas it not?” 

Zestial. He really cares. 

I lowered my hand which had been about to knock. I wanted to hear her answer.

“Let’s not talk about this.”

For the second time, Carmilla began to sing, this time with her companion. By the end, I knew three things for sure. Carmilla had killed an angel to protect her daughters. Carmine Industries had made or acquired a weapon capable of killing angels but thankfully had no intention to mass produce it despite the insane profit they’d gain doing so. Zestial loved her.

I began to sneak down the secluded hallway back to the main one that held the elevators, figuring that with my objective met it’d be best to make my exit rather than risk them knowing I’d overheard. Besides, I didn’t fancy being a third wheel. Then, I stepped on a panel of carpet that made a loud creaking sound. Stupid. Of course Carmilla would lay traps for eavesdroppers. 

My heart leapt to my throat. Friend or not, this was about to get dangerous for me. Carmilla would kill me without hesitation if she thought it’d protect her daughters. Zestial would kill me for much less than that. 

“Oh, hiya!”

Two things happened at once. Carmilla and Zestial came charging out, weapons drawn. The stowaway egg boi ran up to my leg and hugged it.

“Ruth?” Carmilla asked, lowering her blade a bit in confusion.

“Carmilla, Zestial, my apologies,” I said. “My companion here got separated from us. I was hoping you’d seen him, but it seems I didn’t need you after all. Frank,” Making up a name on the spot, I looked down at the egg in admonishment, “what did I say about wandering off?”

“Uh…not to do that?”

“Exactly! And what did you do?”

“...Uh, that?”

“Yes, you did. I’m disappointed in you.”

The egg began to sob to all of our horror. “I’m sorry!” He wailed.

I patted his shell. “Um, it’s fine. No big deal. Just don’t do it again.”

“I won’t!”

Carmilla and Zestial put their weapons away. “Well, I’m glad you found your, uh, egg friend. We should catch up soon, yes?”

“Absolutely,” I smiled, backing up towards the elevators. Only once inside one did I let myself exhale in relief. That was way too close.

“Hey, miss, why did you call me Frank?”

“Sorry, I didn’t catch your name. I just had to make one up on the spot. You really saved me back there though it’s not a place you should’ve been wandering. We saved each other.”

“I’m glad I helped you, nice lady.”

“Well, I’m glad I helped you too. You still haven’t told me your name.”

“I don’t have a name! But you called me Frank. Can I be named Frank now?”

My heart twisted a bit at the sincerity in his eyes. “Sure, Frank.” I held out a hand. “I’m Ruth.”

He shook it with great enthusiasm. “Could you be my new master since Sir Pentious said we had to go away?”

I froze. Right. Vaggie had asked that the egg bois be rehomed. It felt wrong. They could be capable of good too. It wasn’t fair for them to be separated from Sir Pentious. We just had to guide them to make better choices.

“Oh, shit! That’s right! Don’t worry, Frank. You won’t need a new master. I’m going to make sure you guys get back to the hotel. I’ve got to find Alastor before he dumps your brothers somewhere. But, I have no idea where he went.”

“We’re brothers? He’s going to dump them? Oh no!” Frank cried.

The elevator doors opened. We ran outside but saw no sign of Alastor. He’d keep his promise to dispose of the egg bois humanely as a man of his word, but there was no telling how long the creatures would escape harm roaming around hell unprotected. I chewed my bottom lip as I debated my options. I could return to the hotel and ask him where he’d left them but that’d take a lot of time. I could call Charlie and ask her to have him call me as soon as he returned (blast his refusal to get a hellphone!) and start looking in the meantime. Or I could call someone else. Someone who can portal anywhere in seconds. My heart pounded. This is the perfect excuse to call him. I told my brain to shut up. My heart was pounding from anxiety. Definitely anxiety. No other reason. 

With shaky fingers, I opened up my phone and scrolled until I found his name. I hit the call button before I could chicken out. It rang twice before he picked up.

“RUTH! HI BITCH!” 

I winced back as his screaming voice answered the call. “Hey, Lucifer. Uh, no need to shout. Thanks for answering.”

“Right! Sorry about that. Got a little over excited there. Or, not excited, but…I’m glad you called. Really glad.”

My cheeks heated. “Yeah. I’m glad I called too. We need to catch up.” I’ve missed you. “Um, but I’m actually calling for a favor. So sorry to do this, but I need your help.”

His tone became serious in an instant. “Where are you?” 

“Outside Carmine Industries.”

POP! A flash of gold light appeared beside me, and then he was there. He looked rough. His hair hung limp on his forehead, and his suit had some wrinkles near the collar. His expression was steel, and it took me aback. I hadn’t seen him so determined before. All at once I could see how he’d damned humanity, intentions notwithstanding. His stubborn will was a force to be reckoned with.

“Are you okay?” he asked. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for coming, Luci. I actually needed help finding Alastor. He’s rehoming Sir Pentious’s minions, and I need to find him to make sure they get back to the hotel instead.”

“Sir Pentious?”

“Oh! Right, you probably haven’t heard about him yet. He’s a new guest at the hotel.”

His eyes brightened. “A new guest, huh? Charlie’s hotel is starting to take off. I’ll have to call her to congratulate her.” 

“She’d love that,” I said. “Even better, come for dinner after we find Frank’s brothers. Wait, I’m so rude. Sorry, Frank. This is Lucifer Morningstar, king of hell. Lucifer, this is Frank.”

“Hi there! You’re the king? You must be super evil!” He said it as a compliment, but I winced. Lucifer, thankfully, took it in stride.

“To some, I guess. I prefer to think of myself as a cool dad and rubber duck enthusiast,” he said with a wink at me. That wink awakened butterflies in my stomach I did not care to dissect at that moment. “Now, give me a moment to find that radio bastard.” His brows furrowed with concentration. “Ah, there he is.” He waved an arm and another portal appeared. Lucifer put a foot in and then held out a hand for me. “Shall we?” 

I took his hand and stepped through. Frank followed. We were in Cannibal Town. Several cannibals paused their leisure strolls around the lovely garden at the center of their town square gape at us. Alastor’s smile turned sharp at our appearance. He turned his head around 360 degrees to admonish the onlookers, resulting in their scattering, before returning his stare to me.

“Ruth. Lucifer. What a surprise. ” 

“Brothers!” Frank cried as he ran to his egg brethren. “Guess what? We’re brothers, and my name is Frank!”

“Woah! We have names?”

“We could! Ruth named me. She can name all of you too.”

Alastor facepalmed. “Why am I not surprised you grew attached to one of these infernal nuisances?” 

The egg bois swarmed around me. 

“Can you give me a name?”

“Me too!”

“No, me first. What’s my name?”

I stumbled back. Lucifer steadied me with a gentle hand on my upper arm. 

“Stop crowding her,” he said. The eggs backed up a bit. 

“Um, I suppose I could name you all. If you’d like.” They shouted loud agreements. I proceeded to name the remaining four egg bois the first names I thought of: Steve, Tim, John, and Paul. Once named, they jumped around us introducing themselves to each other with various levels of decibel breaking shouts. 

Lucifer looked amused by the scene. He stood close to me with a smirk on his face. Alastor’s smile remained fixed on his face, but I could tell he was aggravated. 

“Settle down,” he snapped at the eggs who obeyed in an instant. “Now, I remain a bit confused as to why you are here and with our most royal highness no less. Care to explain?”

“I called Lucifer to help me find you. Frank really helped me after the meeting with the overlords. I know Vaggie asked you to find the eggs a new home, but it’s not right for us to decide what their home is. They deserve to have a choice, same as any other hotel guest. If they want to stay with Sir Pentious, then they should be allowed to stay, so long as they agree to follow the hotel’s rules.” 

He raised an eyebrow. “What a noble declaration. Yet, it seems a bit bold to go against the wishes of Charlie’s partner, no?”

I swallowed hard. “It is. I have to believe that she and Charlie will understand when I explain my reasons.” 

“I think you’ve made some good points,” Lucifer said. “I know Charlie, and she wouldn’t turn away anyone who wanted to stay at the hotel. Which begs the question,” he turned to address the eggs, “do you all want to stay at the hotel?”

“Will the nice naming lady be there? And Sir Pentious?”

“Yes,” Lucifer replied with a little laugh, “the nice naming lady will be there. And I guess this Pentious guy too since he’s a guest there.”

“Then, yes!” 

“Well, that settles it then.” He waved a hand and another portal appeared. “Figured I’d save you all the walk.” 

Alastor’s eyes narrowed. “Thank you, but I have business to attend to. I’ll walk back in due time.”

Prideful ass. Of course he’d refuse to use Lucifer’s portal. 

“We’ll catch up later then,” I said. 

“Most definitely,” he replied. 

My heart pounded. Lucifer looked between us with narrowed eyes. I did my best to distract him with a smile and stepped through the portal. It wouldn’t be good for him to question Alastor and I’s relationship too much. I’d phrased it as an alliance to him because it broadly was, but it was also a deal that allowed my friend to hold sinister power over me when he chose to wield it. A friend who seemed more paranoid and controlling of me than he’d ever been before since returning from his mysterious sabbatical. 

Lucifer, the egg bois, and I entered the hotel and paused at the scene in the lobby. Everyone congregated together laughing and talking. Angel had draped himself over the couch, partially in Husk’s lap. Husk, for once, did not bristle at the closeness and instead laughed while nursing a drink. Nifty flitted around stabbing bugs to add to a large dead bug garland she’d hung in front of the banner welcoming Sir Pentious. He’d been petting KeeKee but jumped up when we entered. 

“My eggs!” he cried as he slithered forward to embrace them. They gladly returned it. 

Vaggie and Charlie ran up behind him.

“Dad!”

“Hey, apple of my eye!” Lucifer wrapped her in a hug. “Things are looking amazing here, sweetheart. I see you’ve gotten some more guests. I’m so proud of you.”

Tears welled up in her eyes. She hugged him tighter. “Thanks, dad. That means a lot.”

Vaggie caught my eye. She smiled. We bonded again in that moment as we saw personification of light in this pit of darkness find solace in the arms of one parent who for sure had her best interests at heart. 

“I see you brought the eggs back,” she said.

“Yeah. I’m sorry if I went over your head, I just-”

She held up a hand to stop me. “Thank you. You saved me the trouble of hunting down Alastor to bring them back myself. I acted impulsively this morning. I’ve realized I need to trust our guests, even if they don’t always make the best decisions.”

I hummed in agreement. “It feels like I missed some big developments around here.”

She laughed a bit. “You missed some excitement for sure. Looks like we all came around though. At least for today.” 

“Well, there’s only one thing missing,” I said loud enough to draw the attention of the crowd. “Give me an hour. Then, you’d better be in the dining room for family dinner. No exceptions.”

Husk and Angel grumbled, but their smiles gave them away. Lucifer rolled up his sleeves and nodded towards the kitchen. For that brief moment in time, all worries of extermination, dead angels, and war with heaven faded away. If only those worries could’ve stayed away forever. 

Chapter Text

There's a First Time for Everything

"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."  

Deuteronomy 22:28-29

Family dinner devolved into an epic game of craps. Angel seemed to be challenging himself to find the lewdest ways to toss his dice. Husk riled him up by pretending to be unaffected. Nifty skittered around everyone’s ankles dusting the stained carpets. Sir Pentious was losing. Painfully. Likely because he let his eggs coach him through how to play. Thanks to some tips from Lucifer, who unsurprisingly was versed in games of chance, Charlie was holding her own. Vaggie's death glares at anyone getting too rowdy kept the game relatively civil. Alastor lounged nearby with a scotch in hand, ever watchful and vaguely amused. 

I tried my best to immerse myself in the fun, but my thoughts kept drifting back to all I’d learned. Angels could be killed, and the overlords now knew it. The Vees were prepared to challenge heaven in a war hell could not win. Or, if nothing else, to embolden their competitors to stick their necks out and get slaughtered in the next extermination. Adam would be returning in just two months now. 

I excused myself and retreated to the balcony above the entrance on the second floor. I perched on the railing and let the hot night breeze rustle my hair. Heaven’s white aura glowed brighter than the red haze of hell. Something sour twisted in my gut. 

“Hey,” Lucifer said softly. “want some company?”

I nodded. He hopped up on the rail beside me. “Charlie’s found quite the group.”

I smiled. “Yeah. They’re something. I think she’s doing it though. They don’t see it yet, but they’re changing.” I paused. “I think we all are. I never thought of myself as lonely before. I helped sinners, and I considered the overlords I partnered with to be friends despite the complications of our contracts. But being around people never felt like this. You know?”

His brows creased. “I’ll have to take your word for it. I haven’t been around them all that much. Sometimes, when I see them all, I think of…” he trailed off. 

“Think of?” I prompted.

“My siblings,” he said. The words sounded painful. 

“Oh,” I said. We fell into silence. I wouldn’t make the mistake of pushing him too far again. Then, to my surprise, he spoke more.

“We’d play together, eat together, and even sleep in a pile on some clouds together. At least, we did in the early days. There wasn’t much stuff at first. All the grandeur came later. It was great. I wish you could’ve seen Eden before the Earth became fully populated. There were so many trees. It was so green but also colorful with all these fruits and flowers.” He sighed. “I miss that green. The only place down here with anything close is Greed and, uh, that is definitely not the same. Mammon can’t know what a forest is really like, but I still swear sometimes he managed to make his place that sick green to fuck with my head.”

I shivered at the thought of Greed. I’d gone once and vowed to never return. “The sins weren’t other fallen angels too?”

Lucifer shook his head. “Common myth, but no. The other angels in my little rebellion did fall, too, and became noble families down here. The sins were something else. As humanity developed and found their greatest vices, a new layer of hell would emerge and they’d just…be there. Somehow fully grown but also ignorant to everything. I was shitty to them at first, to be honest. I regret that. But, we came around. Kind of. It took a while for hell to be populated with sinners and the hellborn. It took a long time for us to even realize the sins could create life to create citizens for them to rule over. I guess that proximity and the threat of heaven wiping us out forced us to work together enough to prevent complete anarchy.”

I thought back to my knowledge of the sins. I’d only met one: Queen Bee. She was kind. Her realm certainly had its fair share of gluttony, but she also made sure no one went beyond their limits. I hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but now I realized how contrary to the spirit of gluttony her encouragement of safe consumption was. 

“Why aren’t all the sins, well, cruel? Or uncaring towards their people?” I reiterated my observations of Bee. 

He grinned a bit. “Yeah, she and Ozzie are the best of us. Bel is pretty chill, too. They’ve got free will, same as the humans, thanks to my apple snafu. Who they are is who they’ve chosen to be over the centuries. Just because they were born to embody a vice doesn’t mean that’s all they could be.” 

I blinked. The answer was so obvious. I prepared to say more but noticed him stiffen. Then, he relaxed again. He turned to me with a twinkle in his eye, grabbed my hand, and snapped his fingers. In an instant, we were somewhere new. We were now seated on the edge of a floating island I recognized to be characteristic of Sloth. I jolted back from the edge into Lucifer’s chest. He wrapped his arms around me to steady me.

“What the hell was that?” I yelled. 

“Sorry for the sudden change of scenery. I didn’t feel like letting Alastor’s little spies be privy to our conversation.”

Now, my body tensed. Of course. I should’ve known he’d want to spy on us. He’d be pissed about our disappearing act. I curled a bit, noticing that Lucifer hadn’t let me go. I didn’t ask him too, either. It felt nice to be held like this. I took a deep breath. The air felt a little cooler here. The long, pink grasses rustled. Some moth-like creatures swirled around our heads. I smiled when one touched down on my nose before taking off again. 

“How much trouble are you in with him?” he asked, voice grave.

My smile fell. “What do you mean?” I replied, careful to keep my words nonchalant. 

“The Radio Demon. Does he have your soul?”

I shook my head. “No. We made an alliance, remember? We’re partners.”

He squeezed me a little tighter. “Ruth,” he murmured, voice laced with sadness and a twinge of amusement, “I made the first soul contract. I’ve seen the overlord system evolve from inception. There aren’t alliances in hell. There are only deals, and deals always favor the better dealmaker.” 

“I’ve been around a long time. I can hold my own.”

He rested his head atop mine. A blush spread over my cheeks. This is too much. We’re not…I should tell him to let me go. Yet, I didn’t. 

“I don’t doubt it. What you’ve managed to build for yourself and your sinners is incredible. But I’ve been around a long time too. I know fear. You’re afraid of him. So, again, I’ve got to ask. Does he have your soul?”

“No. I can’t disclose the details of our deal, but it wasn’t a soul bargain. We both provide certain services, and we both benefit.”

He sighed in relief. “Well, I’m glad you didn’t give that bastard something that precious. But no matter what kind of deal you made, I can break it. You don’t have to be in a deal with him anymore if you don’t want to.”

I sat up. He reluctantly let me go. “You can break deals?”

“Of course. I’m the king of hell. The head honcho. Any magic sinners wield is child’s play compared to mine.” 

The implications had me spinning. “You could unravel every hierarchy in Pride City in a blink if you wanted to.” 

He seemed surprised by my shock. “Well, yeah. But, I won’t. I made that mistake in the early days. I tried to micromanage everything and make the sinners be, well, not sinners. And, I did. Kind of. To prevent any evil done by evil people, I had to control every aspect of their lives. I hated it. I became what I never wanted to be: a slavemaster dictating everyone’s fate by the force of my will. But, when I backed off, they did evil shit. It was my father’s ultimate punishment, really. I realized how impossible it all was. So, I stopped. Stayed in my mansion and left them to sort it out. They’re here for a reason, after all. They’ve got free will. Might as well let them use it how they see fit.”

“Wow,” I breathed. “I had no idea you were an active ruler once.”

“That was a really long time ago,” he said. He looked off into the distance. “Lilith didn’t give up so easily. She wasn’t bothered by their actions like me. Instead, she used her power to enthrall her people. Her concerts were a riot. She influences people with her voice. At its most powerful, she can get anyone to do just about anything. It takes a lot of strength to resist. The sinners had no chance. The sins and I could, though.”

“So, you both ruled by force. Yours was brute force, hers was more subtle. But the same outcome.”

He shrugged. “I guess. Again, it wasn’t really for me, though. I never wanted to be a king. I just wanted to make things. But, back to the point, do you want me to break your deal with Alastor?”

I refocused my mind and considered it. I’d never wanted to make a deal. It’d felt necessary for my safety. Looking back, Alastor definitely used my fear of Adam to motivate me. I’d made the deal the same night I’d learned about the exterminations, so I’d hardly been in the best mental state. He’d made me go against my moral compass. I’d hurt people like Husk because of it. My choices felt limited. Even now, fear tainted this moment with Lucifer as my deal’s forced loyalty to his best interests made me question my choices with this man I’d grown to care for. My loyalty to him had been compromised ever since he brought me to the hotel. I couldn’t let him hurt Charlie, a true innocent. 

Yet, our deal also allowed me to do my work. I’d helped countless women escape fates worse than eternal damnation. I’d saved my own life through the Grimoire which allowed me to escape to other layers during the exterminations. Right? Now you have Lucifer to protect you. You know he would. You don’t need Alastor to help sinners anymore. You’ve built yourself up, made your own allies, and could be protected from him. 

I could be free of the deal. The lifechanging word, yes, rested on my tongue. You’ll lose a friend. My mouth closed. Alastor had been a friend to me. I knew he did care about me regardless of our deal. We’d built something true all these years. I saw him. He’d never be redeemed, despite Charlie’s best intentions. He belonged in hell and was happy here. But he could be kind. Loyal. Just. He looked out for those who he considered his own.

He could also be vengeful. Sadistic. Calculated. He had magic beyond that of any other overlord. He was a true monster and a devastating weapon if wielded appropriately. Someone had him in chains, and I couldn’t trust whoever that was not to hurt the hotel. If I broke from him now, I’d lose his trust. I’d no longer have any insight into his actions that could allow me to help him out of his deal or warn his potential victims. 

Loyalty. Damn, blasted, twisted loyalty. Loyalty that would lead me to choose to stay entwined to a monster rather than be free. Loyalty that increasingly had me torn apart between all the people I cared for. Tears welled up in my eyes. There was too much to protect. 

“No! Don’t cry. No tears. Come on. It’s okay. I’ll break the deal, and you’ll be free. Don’t worry!”

“Don’t,” I sniffled. “Thank you. Truly. Your offer is too kind. But, for now, I think it’s best to keep things as they are. I know what I’m doing.” Liar, my brain mocked.

He wiped a tear away. “You sure?” he asked. “I hate this. I hate to see you stuck with that prick. I don’t want you to be afraid.” 

I smiled despite the wetness on my face, leaned into his hand. “Yeah. I am afraid, but it’s not all bad. I’m afraid because I have so much to lose now.” I looked into his eyes. “I don’t want the people I care about to get hurt. I…I don’t want you to get hurt.”

His features softened. “I feel like a dick to bring this up again, but I’m the king of hell, sweetheart. No overlord is going to hurt me.”

“What about heaven?”

His eyes darkened. “Ah. That’s what you’re really scared of. Adam.” His name roiled through my belly. Lucifer caught me in his embrace again. My blush burned hot. He chuckled into my neck. A whole other heat bloomed in my core. “He’s got nothin’ on me, honey. I’ll never let him touch you again. Got that? Ruth, angel of hell, no matter what we become or what choices you make, I, Lucifer, king of hell, vow that I will never allow Adam, first man, to touch you again.” 

A gold glow enveloped us as the weight of ancient, powerful magic fell over me. Unlike Alastor’s magic which forced itself against me abrasively all those years ago, this magic glided over my skin like velvet. Soft, sensual, tender.  

“What did you just do?”

His hand stroked my upper back. “You know what I did. It doesn’t have to mean anything. Like I said, this vow will be in place regardless of what we are or what you do. It’s not a deal. It’s a promise. You’ll be safe from him. No matter what.”

Safe. How long had it been since I’d felt truly safe? Since it had been a gift given instead of a condition of my compliance? I acted without thinking. I grabbed his face and pressed my lips to his. 

He reacted quickly. He took control of the kiss and, to my surprise, slowed down my rapid pace. He took his time exploring all our first kiss could be. His tongue swept over my bottom lip. I opened my mouth. His tongue tangled with mine in a slow, sensual dance. He kissed like he wanted to commit every inch of me to memory. There was no hunger or demand for more. No, he kissed with the leisure certainty that he’d get all he could desire in due time. 

 I pulled away to catch my breath, my soft pants loud against the quiet of the night. He laid back and pulled me down with him, tucking me into his chest. 

“That was so much better than what I’ve been fantasizing,” he said. I ducked my head into his armpit. He grinned, flashing his sharp teeth. “Don’t be embarrassed. We’re in hell. No need for shame down here.” 

I looked up. “You definitely have no shame.”

A lie, but we laughed anyway. 

“I’m into monogamy, FYI. All respect to whatever floats folks' boats, but I’m a one person at a time kind of guy.” 

“That’s my preference too,” I said. 

He kissed me again. “I’m glad,” he whispered, voice deep. 

“You seem to be very, ah, into the physical side of things,” I noted as his hand began to stroke my side gently. 

“Once I’ve gotten feelings, yeah. I tend to fall hard and fast. I’ve been told I’m a bit intense.” A little vulnerability slipped into his voice. “Think you can cope with that?”

I ran a hand through his hair. “I think so.”

“What about you? Anything I should know from the get go? Ready to share kinks?” He wiggled his eyebrows conspiratorially.

I snorted. “Definitely not. I wouldn’t have much to share. It’s been well over a hundred years, and my times with Adam weren’t, well, you know. Actually, let’s just not count anything with him as relevant relationship experience. I’m a novice here.”

His hand stilled. “Wait, you were only with him? You haven’t dated or fooled around down here? Like, ever?”

I huffed out a laugh. “Believe it or not between forging alliances with hell’s top overlords and working to protect sinners I haven’t had a lot of time to try to find a demon with a moral compass who’d be open to dating an angel in disguise with the baggage of being the ex of the leader of the exterminations.”

“Well, when you put it that way,” Lucifer said with a little laugh. His hand resumed its sensual strokes. 

“I was married in life,” I said softly. “I can hardly remember him now. He was old. I remember that. That was normal, then. I didn’t think much of it. We didn’t marry for love. He was kind, though. Kinder than most men at that time.”

“Do you remember much of your human life?”

I shook my head. “I know the big things that happened, but I can’t quite remember them. It feels almost like a story. Like a different person that is somehow also me.”

He hummed with understanding. We cuddled close, breathing in tandem. After a while he said, “I’m excited to be your first. Your real first. I’m excited to experience it all with you, if you'll let me.”

My eyes stung again, but this time I kept the tears at bay. All at once, I realized I loved this man. This sweet, misunderstood, complicated, wholesome, prideful, mess of a man. Maybe I wasn't in love with him. Or, perhaps I was. I couldn't tell. Whatever I felt for him, this wonderful man who'd offered his protection and kindness without expectation, was strong. To think he was worried he’d fall too hard and fast. You’re ridiculous, Ruth. 

“I’d like that too,” I said. 

We fell asleep in that floating meadow, at peace in each other’s arms, with the spark of the start of something wonderful alight between us. 

Chapter Text

Loyalty and Other Bad Ideas

"Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; so she said to Abram, 'The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.' Abram agreed to what Sarai said."

Genesis 16:1-2

As much as I’d have loved to hide away with Lucifer in that meadow forever, the trials and tribulations of the world beyond demanded our presence. We awoke to light illuminating Sloth. Below us, demons hustled about, oblivious to the spectators to their mundanities.

“I think we overslept,” I said.

“Worth it,” Lucifer yawned. “Haven’t slept that good in a while.”

“Me too.”

“Want to do it again? My bed is big enough.”

I snorted at him. “You weren’t kidding about moving fast.” He just grinned. “Maybe. Probably. But I’m keeping my room. I like my alone time sometimes. Are…what do we tell Charlie?”

He ran a hand through his hair. “The truth. I’m trying to be better, so I know not to lie to her. I hope we’ll have her blessing. If not, then…” he trailed off, expression mournful.

“She comes first,” I reassured him. “I get that. You two have lost enough time. I wouldn’t allow myself to stand in the way of that.”

He entwined his hand in mine. “Thank you,” he murmured. “I’m glad you understand. I love her so much. She still doesn’t know. Doesn’t get that everything I’ve created since her birth is for her. That she’s my miracle, the one good thing to come out of all my mistakes. I never should’ve let Lillith make me believe she was better off without me.”

“You were manipulated. You’ve got to forgive yourself. You’re fighting for her now.” I shuddered. “Literally. The next extermination is only a few months away now.” I remembered all we’d learned last night. “I need to speak to Alastor.”

He grimaced. “Why?”

“I can’t say. It’s important, though. We’re late for morning exercises anyway.”

He groaned. “Fine. You’re right. I need to talk to Charlie.”

With a last sweet kiss, we portaled back to the hotel lobby. 

“Where have you been?” Charlie screeched. 

I paused. She looked distraught. 

“We were, uh, somewhere. Is everything okay, apple pie?”

Charlie tore her hands through her hair. Vaggie put a supportive hand on her shoulder, but she pulled away to stalk up to her father. “No! Everything is not okay. You two missed morning group and Angel got called away again and Adam is bringing a fucking exorcist army to hell to try to kill everyone in like four months!” Her expression crumpled. Behind her, Husk and Nifty deflated a bit. Vaggie looked ready to murder us all on her behalf. Alastor’s smile remained ever fixed. “I don’t know how to do this,” she said. “This is impossible. I can’t redeem sinners. This is too stupid. I’m so stupid.”

“You’re not stupid!” Vaggie and Lucifer said in unison. 

Lucifer stepped forward and took his daughter’s hands. “You’re everything,” he said. “I want you to see yourself as I do more than anything. I love you more than anything. ” 

He began to sing to her. He sang about the pain of losing his dreams and hope. He sang about how he felt when she was born, how she became what he fought for. He sang another apology for letting him be pulled apart from her. 

Husk hid his wet eyes behind a grumble about dumb sappy songs while Nifty looked put out by Lucifer’s sweetness. I wiped my tears away. The depth of love they both felt saturated the room, so thick it almost bordered on painful for me. Yeah, I definitely love this guy. The sparkle slowly returned to Charlie’s eyes. She joined his song, singing about how much she admired him and how he inspired her dream to save her people. By the end, they sang in tandem about how the strength of their love and their now shared dream as father supported daughter. 

“Come on, duckie,” he said after they shared a long embrace. “Let’s go review your plans again. You can talk through your ideas for the next few months, and I’ll help make them happen. Yeah?”

She smiled. “That sounds great. Vaggie, will you help too?”

“Of course.”

The three walked off. I caught Alastor’s eye. We walked to his bedroom. I took a deep breath as a shadow shut the door behind us. 

“Have a nice night?” He chirped. 

We’re equals. Friends. You don’t get to intimidate me. “I did, actually. I really enjoyed the privacy. ” He hissed in irritation. “Listen, you can throw a hissy fit later.”

“I do not throw-”

“Lucifer can break soul deals.”

His mouth snapped shut. “I beg your pardon?”

“You heard me.” I began to pace. “He offered to break ours. I refused. Just in case my loyalty is still in question. But, yeah. Apparently, he used to use that power more when he was an active ruler but decided it was best not to interfere with the fragile governing structures the overlords cobbled together. He can break your deal with whoever is controlling you. Then, you won’t have to hurt Charlie. You can be free.”

He squeezed his eyes shut. The frustration on the upper half on his face contrasted with the smile etched to the lower half looked grotesque. “Tell me you didn’t tell him about my situation.”

“I didn’t. I know you prefer your privacy. That’s why I’m telling you this here, in private. So you can be the one who talks to him.”

His shoulders sagged with relief. “Thank you, but I won’t be speaking to hell’s little king.”

I balked. “Seriously? Forget your goddamn pride for once, you moron!”

“Pride has nothing to do with it,” he snapped. “I can’t speak about this, but trust me when I say his interference will only worsen this delicate situation. The status quo allows time to grow stronger. Nothing good will come from forcing anyone’s hand. Do you understand?”

Holy arms. Zestial's words echoed in my head. “Alastor, what the fuck did you do? Whoever has your soul is no ordinary sinner, huh?”

“Ruth,” he grit out. “I cannot speak about this. Asking questions, in any way attempting to help, will put you in danger. For once, can you quell your reckless tendencies and play the game?”

"It's not him, is it?" I choked out.

"You know better. Our deal ensures I protect you from him."

My heart squeezed. “I’m trying to protect everyone,” I whispered. 

He tutted, almost sympathetic. “War is coming. Loss is to be expected.”

That lit a fire within me. “No. We can save everyone. There has to be a way.”

He chuckled. “You’re too much like our darling princess. So idealistically naive. Yet, you’ve got some menace to you. Some delicious shadow from encountering mankind’s greatest depravities.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Just because you’ve suffered doesn’t mean you have to let those shadows consume you. You can claw your way out of the darkness and back to the light.”

He threw his head back and cackled. “But the shadows are so much more fun!”

I felt reaffirmed in my decision to hold off on breaking our deal, at least for now. If- no, when- Charlie redeemed the sinners, Alastor would remain down here with me. And Lucifer. In the end, it'd be best if we could all remain on good terms. 

“Right. Forgot who I was talking to for a second there.”

“Speaking of talks, what did you learn about darling Carmilla? What is that delightful little phrase Nifty taught me? Oh, yes. Serve the tea!”

I snorted. “I think it’s spill the tea. She killed the angel with some kind of weapon. She has no plans to share what that weapon is or capitalize on selling it. She doesn’t want war with heaven.”

He hummed. “Interesting. Do me a favor and keep this to yourself.”

I glared at him. “Charlie needs to know.”

“And know she will when I deem the time to be right.”

“No,” I said. “You don’t get to use this to manipulate her.”

“You’re forcing my hand. We have a deal. This falls under operating in my best interest. It is in my best interest for you to keep this to yourself.”

I felt the weight of the deal’s binds fall on me. I gasped in outrage. “Have you forgotten I can have Lucifer break our deal any time? I said no because I didn’t want to end our partnership. We’ve both benefited from allying with each other, and I’ve considered you a friend. But if you’re going to be a dick, I’ll go end this now.”

I turned to the door but shadows instantly encircled me. I wriggled but it was no use. They had me in a vice grip. I opened my mouth to scream but a shadow covered my mouth. Sweat pooled on my forehead. I began to hyperventilate. Alastor loomed over me. 

“Breathe,” he ordered. “I’ll uncover your mouth, but if you scream I’m covering it again.”

I nodded. True to his word, the shadow left my mouth. I fought to catch my breath. 

“Let me go,” I said, voice shaky. “You can’t hurt me. It’s in the contract.”

“You’re right,” he said. “But, if you break the contract, that will no longer be the case, hm?” His eyes bore into mine, earnest. He dropped the wall blocking his emotions. I felt his anxiety in full force. His rage at being used by whoever held his soul. His fear. “I will be honest about your current place as a piece in this game. You know too much and are too powerful a player to be left unchecked. Especially now that you seem to be the king's consort. So, trust me when I say that our deal, our contractual bind to protect one another, is a shield you need right now. Do you understand?” 

His words were truthful. He, at least, believed his assessment of the situation. And, given his ability to maneuver through the politics of power in hell, I trusted his judgement about this. So, I nodded. The shadows fell away. 

“We’re at a stalemate, then? Whoever is pulling your strings will move to hurt the hotel if Lucifer breaks either of our deals. And this person, whoever they are, is a bigger threat than Adam and his army?” 

I saw him strain against whatever magic kept him revealing the secrets of his deal. “Correct. And, it should go without saying, it is also in my best interest for you to keep your knowledge of this entity to yourself.”

Damn you. I shivered. “Okay. Okay, fine. I’ll play along for a little longer. But how long do you expect me to do this? We can’t stay at a stalemate forever.”

“Trust me,” he said. I felt another burst of earnestness before his emotional wall returned.

I hesitated then nodded. “For now,” I warned. 

“Fine,” he snapped. 

I retreated to my room after our talk. I felt dirty. How could I keep this crucial information from Charlie? From Lucifer? We’d spoken last night about discovering a healthy love together. I should've told Lucifer everything last night. I should've put my loyalty to my old pal aside for all our best interests. Now, I’d be forced to build our relationship on lies. The shower didn’t wash away the feeling. I watched the water swirl around the drain. 

When will it end? The secrets, the struggle, the constant fight just to exist. When do I get to just be happy?

Alastor’s words rang in my head. War is coming. Loss is to be expected. I knew loss. Forever ago, in my mortal life, I’d lost my betrothed and most of our village to war. I chose to follow my mother-in-law to her home after this to make sure she had someone to care for her after losing all her sons and in doing so lost my family and culture. I lost myself in my marriage to Adam. My mind and body were ravaged by him. My sanity crumbled under the dichotomy of abuse in what should’ve been my sanctuary, in the indifference of all the angels around me, in being forced to realize all I’d built my life on had been a lie. My faith had been a lie. Then, in choosing to escape my gilded cage, I lost the second home I’d ever known. The second culture I’d ever adopted as my own. I couldn’t lose any more.

Hell is my home. It’s fucked up, but at least it’s honest about itself. It doesn’t hide its wounds. Sure, Lucifer and Lillith allowed the psychopaths down here to pretty much take over, but that can be undone. Charlie’s rule will change everything. It’ll never be perfect, but it can be good enough. It has to be. 

I jumped out of the shower and dressed in my coziest pajamas. I resolved to do all I could to protect my home. My family. Lucifer and Charlie’s faces flashed in my mind. I’d ask Vaggie to train me to fight. I’d ask Alastor to teach me magic as he’d once offered. I’d ask Lucifer…well, I’d ask Lucifer to hold me when I couldn’t be strong anymore. And I’d hold him too. 

Speak of the devil, a knock sounded on my door.

“Come in.”

He entered, eyes light. “Damn,” he whistled. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?”

I blushed down to my toes. Suddenly, I felt all too aware of my oversized, fluffy sweatshirt and tattered pajama pants. 

“Shut up,” I grumbled.

He stalked closer. “Aw, are you embarrassed?”

“No!”

“Then why are you so red?”

I backed up. He kept coming until he had me caged with his arms on either side of my head. 

“I’m not!”

He leaned down and kissed the curve of my neck. “Really?” he purred. “You look pretty red to me.”

A strangled squeak left my mouth. “L-Lucifer,” I panted.

“Yes,” he murmured between kisses.

“Wha- mm- h-how did your talk with Charlie go?”

He pulled back. I did my best to recover myself. 

“Amazing,” he smiled. “We’ve got a decent plan for the redemption stuff. But, we also talked about you.”

“Me?”

He nodded. “Yeah. I told her about last night. About how I feel about you. She said she’s happy for me. For us. Lilith, well, she’ll always be Charlie’s mother, but Charlie is dealing with her feelings about her. It’s a bit raw, to be honest. We’re both still reeling. But, she really likes you. She said she wants me to be happy.”

I melted with relief. “I’m glad,” I said. “I’d never try to replace Lilith. Charlie’s an adult, so I know she may not have any interest in me being a mother figure despite dating you. But, I’ll always support her. She has my loyalty. I’ll do whatever I can to help her make her vision of hell a reality.”

“I know,” Lucifer said. Fondness for me radiated from him. Also, a strange fierceness. There was something to his expression as he looked at me, almost as if assessing. As if he were eyeing his future queen. 

Hah! Me, plain old Ruth, queen of hell. What a laughable thought. Yet, the thought lingered. Laughable or not, with war coming, hell will need a strong ruling family. And maybe, just maybe, the three of us are it.

Chapter Text

No Good Deed

“Do not allow a sorceress to live.”

Exodus 22:18

“No, no, no. You need to emphasize each syllable. Incantations require the clearest of diction.” Alastor flicked the empty glass in front of us with a talon while I huffed. “Try again. Slow and clear this time.”

I inhaled, picturing myself drawing in the ether of hell as I did so. I exhaled and imagined that power flowing out through my body in my mind’s eye. Feet planted, gaze steady, I said the magic words again. The glass rattled a bit then stilled. 

“Dammit. I’m no good at this.”

I’d held firm on my refusal to make soul deals to grow my magic which left a sparse handful of magical paths open for me as someone with no real cultural or ancestral ties after most of the lifespan I could remember clearly was spent behind the pearly gates. Witchcraft, thankfully, was not a closed practice in general, but I discovered quickly this did not make it easy to master. 

Alastor ignored my whining, examining the glass. “Hmmm. Slight improvement. There’s some condensation. You managed to summon a few drops.”

“You and Lucifer make conjuring things look so easy.”

“I’d prefer you not mention that insufferable moron in the same sentence as me.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re going to have to warm up to him eventually. We’re dating.”

He looked me up and down, then said, “I need only take stock of your wardrobe to deduce your estrangement from good taste.”

I squawked in outrage, pawing at the t-shirt and jeans I'd borrowed. “Cherri said this is what’s in style now. Pants are much more convenient to fight in, you know. I’ve decided to get with the times. You might want to give it a try.”

He raised a brow. “The day I get with the times is the day Nifty gives me a gunshot lobotomy.”

“You got it, boss!” I jumped when the tiny demon scuttled in. “It’s in my contract!”

Truth. I ran a hand over my face. “I can’t believe you put that in her contract.”

“Of course I did. I’m a man of standards,” he scoffed.

“King bad boy told me to tell you that you’re late for your shift, dickless.”

Feedback screeched at her words. She just smiled, oblivious to his rage. 

“Don’t shoot the messenger, Al,” I said, massaging my temples. “Or the sender. I’ll handle him.” 

Later. If we even get a chance to talk. We’d all been busy since that fateful day two weeks ago now when Angel’s contract was broken. My thoughts drifted back to the conversation that started it all.

Lucifer and I’d taken to starting the day together on my balcony bench, sipping steaming mugs of tea. He flexed his fingers around mine. I returned the gesture, eyes distant. I knew the power words held in hell, yet the ones caught in my throat still felt monumental on an entirely new scale. 

“Luci?” I murmured. 

“Hm?” He hummed back.  

“There’s a contract I think you should break.”

He turned to face me, eyes sparkling. “You changed your mind? I knew you would!”

“No,” I said quickly, “not my deal with Alastor.” His expression plummeted. “He’s my friend,” I reminded him. “No, it’s, um, it’s Angel’s contract.” Something bitter gnawed at my gut. 

I cared about Angel. I wanted to help him and knew deep down this was the right thing. But it will also change things. Between Lucifer and me. Between Lucifer and everyone else in the hotel. Maybe for all of Pride. 

Lucifer wrapped his hands around his mug. “Okay,” he said slowly. “What are the details?”

“His soul was sold to Valentino.” No recognition flared at the name. I sighed. “One of the Vees. Moth demon overlord. Holds a monopoly on all pornography and prostitutes in Pride.”

“Oh, the one with the glasses. I think I know who you’re talking about.”

“Right. He’s abusive to Angel. It’s bad. Really, really bad.” I wondered who else had noticed just how bad it was. Angel was a pro at hiding the worst of it, but I saw through his guise. I knew how makeup caked over bruises looked. I understood how you moved when trying to hide your pain. Most of all, I’d worn that mask of fineness so convincing you could almost fool yourself. 

Lucifer looked away from me. “Many soul deals are like that,” he said softly. 

“I know. I’m not asking you to step in the way you did before and break every bad deal. But, Angel…”

“Is a friend,” he finished. “I get it.” He stared off into the distance, brows furrowed. Then, he shrugged. “Fuck it, why not? If he wants to change, he should get his chance, no strings attached.” 

“Thank you.” I reconnected our hands. “Truly. I don’t ever want to take advantage of you.”

He brushed his thumb over my knuckles. “You’re not. I’m glad you told me. Charlie can’t exactly redeem him if he’s tangled up in all this.”

“Wait, Charlie," I gasped. "Does she have the power to break soul deals too?”

Lucifer’s brows shot up. “Huh. I don’t see why not given that she’s got a good dose of the ol’ Morningstar magic. I really ought to start training her. Lily said she’d handle it, but I’m starting to suspect she never followed through. Oh, this’ll be great!” He leapt up, consumed with exuberance. I dodged tea splatters from his mug. “We can start with manifesting ducks. What better way is there to spend some dad and daughter time?”

“Go,” I laughed. “Tell her about the soul deals. If anyone were to break Angel’s contract, it actually should be her.” 

He shot me a grateful look, planted a quick kiss on my lips, and zapped away. I released a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. It’ll be fine. It’s just one little contract. No big deal. I tidied the balcony and took my time getting ready for the day. Then, I sought out the hotel lobby. I paused at the scene that greeted me. 

Husk stared off into the distance, jaw slacked. Sir Pentious sniffled and failed to hide a stray tear. Alastor’s eye twitched above his smile.

“Is everything alright?” I asked.

“The princess…she…I…” Husk mumbled.

“Our dearest princess has just learned to break soul deals. A Morningstar gift, evidently.”

“Wait,” I gasped. “did Charlie already break a contract?”

“The king came, talked to her, and then with just a few words of guidance she just…did it,” Sir Pentious said.

“Where is she?”

“Angel ran away after his chain fell. Charlie and her father went after him.” 

“Oh,” My chest tightened. “Is he okay? I know it’s got to be a shock but…I mean- I thought he’d be happy.”

Husk took a swig from one of the bar’s top shelf bottles. “Did the king suddenly coming to Charlie about this have anything to do with a certain sinner who’s always hangin’ around him?”

I averted my eyes. “I haven’t known Lucifer could do this for long,” I said. The cat demon shot me a look. It took a moment, but then I caught his unspoken message. You’re still working for Alastor? He wouldn’t know the intricacies of our deal. From his perspective, I could see where he’d assume me to be in a soul deal like him. “It’s quite the power, isn’t it?” I continued, meeting his gaze levelly. “I hope Charlie doesn’t shake up the foundations of our society on a whim.”

He perched on a bar stool, expression conflicted. 

“How do you think the Vees will react to this?” Sir Pentious asked.

Everyone except Alastor froze in alarm. For his part, he laughed gleefully. “Oh, this will be so entertaining!” 

As if summoned by his excitement, a loud bang rattled the front doors. I shrieked from the sudden noise before clamping my mouth shut. Cold adrenaline raced through my veins. 

“I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE YOU LITTLE BITCH!” Valentino screamed. “GET OUT AND FACE ME! YOU DON’T GET JUST TO LEAVE ME, YOU FUCKIN’ SLUT!” 

The cold became an inferno in an instant. I lunged forward, ready to vaporize this sinner, but shadows wrapped around my feet, keeping me pinned to the floor. 

“As fun as it would be to watch you take out your rage on this filth, it is not your duty to defend this hotel,” Alastor said. 

“You’re right,” a dangerous voice snarled. “It’s mine,” Lucifer swept into the lobby with Charlie, Vaggie, and Angel close behind. 

My heart broke at how disheveled Angel looked. He’d clearly been crying. His eyes darted around, wild and unsure. I recognized the fight or flight response in his body language instantly. Charlie wrapped an arm around him while Vaggie stood protectively in front of her girlfriend, spear poised to strike. Angel kept his gaze fixated on the shaking doors. 

“YOU CAN’T DO THIS! WE HAD A DEAL! YOU’RE DONE, ANGEL DUST! I’LL FUCKING RUIN YOU! YOU THINK I HURT BEFORE, YOU WHINY LITTLE CUNT? YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT’S COMIN’!”

Lucifer flicked his wrist and the doors fell open. Valentino surged forward, but he didn’t get far before he found himself suspended in the air. Lucifer kept him there, bound by his magic. The pimp tried to scream again, but his mouth glowed gold. No sound came out. We all paused in shock. So this is what he can do. All at once, I realized just how much freedom he’d given the sinners in his kingdom. He could topple it all, enslave everyone to his will, but he doesn’t. 

Angel and Valentino locked eyes, the former quivering like a leaf. Charlie stepped forward, ignoring Vaggie’s small sound of protest behind her.

“Only those who truly want to redeem themselves are welcome here,” she said. “Angel’s contract is broken. He is a resident of the Hazbin Hotel and under my protection as princess of hell. You need to leave.”

A whirring sound caught my attention. A Vox TV drone hovered outside the wide double doors, no doubt broadcasting the scene to the rest of Pride City. Lucifer made no move to remove it, gazing on his daughter with pride. 

The gold receded from Valentino’s mouth. Lucifer lowered him to the ground. The overlord sputtered in outrage, eyes darting between the royal duo, but made no move to attack. 

“This-this is wrong. You can’t do this. We made a deal, fair and square. You can’t just- just undermine me like this.”

“Valentino,” Angel’s quiet voice carried across the room. He met his former pimp’s eyes, a mix of steel and pain in his expression. “It’s done. You don’t own me anymore. You’re never gonna hurt me again. So, get the fuck outta here.”

Alastor stepped forward, his shadows following. I wiggled my toes in relief, freed from my own bindings. “You heard the good man. Out you go.” Dark tendrils grabbed the moth by the ankles and flung him out the door. Distant curses echoed as he rolled down the hill. The Radio Demon then eyed the Vox drone with disdain and flicked his wrist. His shadows snatched it out of the air, crushed it, and slammed the hotel doors shut. “My, my, hasn’t this been entertaining.” 

“You did good, kid,” Husk said, patting Angel on the back. 

“Are you okay?” I asked, coming to his side.

“Yeah,” he said with a shaky laugh. Four of his arms pawed at the fluff atop of his head. “I’m fine. Great. I’m free. Can’t believe this. Thank you, Charlie. And, uh, your highness. And everybody. Never been better. This is great. Isn’t this great?” 

It hit me like a punch in the gut. Memories of a time I dared not remember or speak of threatened to surface. Sometimes healing from the horrors of the past is more painful than surviving the present. 

“You’ll be okay,” I whispered. “You’ll get through this.”

“What’dya mean? I’m great. Actually, I’m kinda tired. Gotta go sleep off this excitement. And Nuggs hasn’t been fed. So, uh, yeah. Breakfast is in like 20, right?” He walked backwards away from us in the direction of the stairs. “Be back in a jiff. See you guys real soon.” Then, he was gone. 

“Should we go after him?” Charlie asked. 

“I think he needs a minute,” Vaggie said. “This has been…big. You did great handling that pendejo, babe.”

“You think?” she smiled. A few buzzes from someone’s hellphone rang out. We ignored it. 

“I agree, apple pie. You showed ‘em who’s in charge.” 

A few more buzzes sounded. I pulled out my phone and felt my jaw drop in horror. “Oh, no.”

“Ruth?” Lucifer asked. “You okay?”

I held out my screen. Charlie and Vaggie saw the flood of notifications first, faces going white. The first three read:

DICTATOR CHARLIE MORNINGSTAR ATTEMPTING HOSTILE COUP OF PRIDE CITY!!!!!! JOIN THE RESISTANCE NOW!!!!!!

OVERLORDS WARN CONTRACTEES TO STAY AWAY FROM THE HAZBIN HOTEL OR ELSE!!!!

TEMPTED TO BREAK YOUR CONTRACT? READ THIS BEFORE YOU FUCK UP YOUR AFTERLIFE MORE THAN YOU ALREADY HAVE!!!!!

More and more popped up below creating a waterfall of headlines. Nifty fell to the floor cackling. “Whatever it says must be scary.”

“Fuck,” Husk said.

“Fuuuuuck,” Vaggie groaned.

“FUCK!” Charlie screamed. 

A loud explosion in the distance jolted me back to the present moment. Alastor had left for his shift. He’d been taking turns with Lucifer protecting the hotel from the so-called resistance who’d been attempting to attack nonstop. A never ending barrage of attacks was easy enough for the Vees to sustain when they had an immortal fighting force required to follow their every command. Charlie insisted on maintaining shields instead of launching a true counterattack.

“Most of them probably aren’t doing this by choice. It’s not right to hurt them,” she’d said. On a rare instance where Lucifer and Alastor agreed, both protested but ultimately caved to her wishes. It was her hotel, after all, 

When not on protection duty, they trained their respective pupils in magic. Lucifer taught Charlie, and Alastor taught me. The former took to magic the way a duck takes to water. I couldn’t even conjure water yet. After magic lessons, Vaggie trained us both to fight. I experienced more success in those lessons and honed in on knife fighting. Charlie shrieked whenever her weapon got near Vaggie despite the latter's constant reminders that there was no chance she’d succeed in hurting her. In the end, Vaggie caved and let Charlie focus on deflecting blows with a shield. Charlie’s smiles wavered more and more. She’d become public enemy number one overnight. She didn’t have time to run her redemption exercises, and her longest resident, the hotel’s best chance of proving redemption was possible, had fallen apart, suffering through withdrawals from the drugs required to sustain his former lifestyle and a monstrous case of PTSD. 

The hotel gained an additional resident when Angel’s ride or die best friend, Cherri, a cyclops demon with a foul mouth and penchant for explosives, showed up at the hotel after seeing Valentino’s confrontation and became subsequently trapped here when the attacks began. She’d become an invaluable ally in protecting Angel from himself. She and Husk took turns staying with him as he fought his demons day after day. 

With the two magic experts on shield duty round the clock, Sir Pentious worked to lighten their load by using his engineering prowess to reinforce the hotel between disastrous attempts to flirt with Cherri. Nifty and the Egg Bois helped keep everything running smoothly. Or created more chaos. It varied day by day.

The extermination loomed ever closer, but the hotel was already under siege. Charlie did her best to combat Vox’s propaganda with daily radio broadcasts, but they felt small against the tide of hate the Vees stirred up. Carmilla and Rosie had gone eerily silent, refusing to answer my calls. 

“What did you expect?” Alastor’d asked when I complained. “This threatens their power, too.” 

Alone with what felt like all of heaven and hell against us, the strain on us all grew by the day. At night, Lucifer and I collapsed into bed, holding onto each other, too tired for anything amorous. Which is why I was surprised to stumble into the room we now shared and find him staring at me with fire in his eyes. 

“We need to talk,” he said.