Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The morning sun begins to shine through the edges of the dark blue curtains when Enny wakes up from a restless night of sleep. Even after all these years, she still has pre-spelunking jitters and occasional nightmares. Last night was no exception. She dreamt of being trapped deep in the caverns, the ladder broken during a cave in. She was surrounded by more monsters and beasts than she could count. She tries to shake off the images of the creatures as they swarmed and overwhelmed her. 

She wants to get to the desert early, so she packed everything the night before. Coffee is already brewing, and her clothes are laid out. She quickly brushes her teeth, braids her hair into two neat braids, and changes. She drowns her coffee in creamer and finishes it in minutes. She needs to be alert and fully caffeinated if she is going to reach the lowest depths of the caves today. 

She goes back to her bed to give Sebastian a quick kiss on the top of his head. His black hair strewn in every direction tickles her face. She can’t get enough of how it smells, so warm and inviting. The thought crosses her mind to just crawl back into bed, into his arms, but she can’t. She has been planning this trip for weeks. After one last longing look, she makes her way out of the room silently, careful not to wake him. It isn’t often he can sleep when she goes to the caves. She assumes he had been up late if he hadn’t gotten up already. 

She quietly walks down the hall until she comes to the room adorned in stars. She opens the door and crosses the room, tripping over some obnoxiously shaped toy. Luckily, the girl in the bed is not easily woken. She had kicked her monkey blanket off the bed and slept sideways with her head threatening to fall off. Enny gently moves her around and rests her head on the matching monkey pillow. She covers her with her blanket and gently places a kiss on her forehead. It always amazes her that this tiny ball of fury and pure energy looks so peaceful when she sleeps. Like she isn’t a tiny terror. With one final look, she leaves her room, careful not to trip over the same toy. 

The last thing she has to do is pack some food. She grabs the containers from the fridge with easy to eat food on the go. She isn’t sure what is in there because Sebastian likes to make it for her, but it usually has a sandwich, fruit, and some sort of sweets. She stuffs them in her bag and slings it over her shoulder. 

She’s ready. She grabs one of the yellow trimmed wood totems to leave. She never understood how they worked, but the wizard is certain of their safety, and she is thankful for the quick transportation. She activates it and feels all the air being ripped from her lungs. The world isn’t only black, but empty. Rasmodius explains that she is slipping through spacetime itself, but that doesn’t make it any less panic-inducing. Next thing she knows, she is hit hard by the suffocating heat of the desert, while the sun assaults her from the sky. She slowly makes her way to the entrance of the caves, her feet feeling heavy in the deep sand.

The entrance to the cave is small and hidden behind a large door that looks as old as the desert itself. Surprisingly, it is fully functional, not making a single sound when she pushes it open. It is heavy as if it pushes against her from entering. Behind the door is a sketchy looking ladder, covered in rot and looks like it would crumble if you breathed on it too hard. She opts to repel down into the cave instead. She hooks up her gear and begins her descent. 

She keeps most of the monsters at bay in the upper levels. They still manage to slowly repopulate each floor, but she has little problems making her way down floor by floor. By about the 23 rd floor, she has to work harder to get to the next shaft. Some mummies start to pop up with the support of these green flying monsters that can severely injure her. Armed with bombs, she gracefully strikes down the first few mummies she finds. Running past them she drops a bomb next to their broken down bodies. As she does, she hears the familiar screech of the flying beasts. She turns just in time to strike it with her sword, sending it flying backwards in the direction of the bomb. Her timing is impeccable as it flies back over the bomb just as it detonates. The walls are splattered with a mixture of blood and bone powder. 

She continues down, some floors easier than others. The further she goes, the more monsters she finds. Luckily, most of her paths to each shaft are still clear. Enny makes sure to take her time. She has been injured too many times in the caves to know that one small slip up means the difference between life and death. But it feels like a grind to continue. Her arms ache from using her sword and she becomes increasingly winded after each attack. She decides it best to take a break on the 78 th floor and checks the time, 5:30pm. It is getting late, but she’s determined to finally reach the 100 th floor. The furthest she has ever been is the 92 nd floor, but she feels lucky today. The number of monsters is lower than usual, but she knows she needs a short rest if she is going to push on. She finds a large smooth rock to sit on and pulls out her food. Sebastian packed her an egg salad sandwich, her favorite. She nearly eats her own hands from how quickly she scarfs it down and in the next container, she finds a deep red apple and a note. Biting into the apple she reads it:

“Enny,

I hope you enjoy your sandwich, even if eggs are gross. You’re a little gross sometimes so it makes sense you like them 😉  

Izzy and I love you so much. We’ll be watching the stars and waiting for you with hot cocoa. Be safe and come back to us.

-Sebastian and your favorite daughter Izzy (your only one so you have no choice in favorites)”

She reaches into her bag and pulls out a picture of the two of them together. Izzy’s wrapped up in a fox towel that was far too big for her, while Sebastian held her. She isn’t even two yet in the picture. Now at 8, she is clearly an adult, who makes all her own decisions. The worn edges of the picture and small rip tell Enny it is time to replace it. She carefully tucks the picture into her front pants pocket with the note so she will remember to put it away when she gets home.

She finishes her apple and returns to her work. She doesn’t want them up all night, so she needs to keep going. The levels are getting harder, but she clears them quicker and easier than she expects until she comes to a stretch of 4 levels that are completely devoid of life, leaving an eerie feeling. She should be thankful, but her stomach begins to knot instead. Upon dropping down to the next floor, she immediately notices something wrong. It feels as though she falls through an invisible barrier and her rope snaps, sending her down the last few feet onto the ground. It hurts, but nothing serious.

She looks around and notices the walls of the cave dull in the lack of light. They seem to be made of an entirely different material than the previous ones, which is very odd. The air itself is pungent and thick. It smells of blood. She hears distant cries from what she imagines is an animal dying. With it, she hears the ripping of skin and breaking of bones. This is wrong. She jumps up and turns on her heels as fast as she can to climb back up, but when she looks up, the shaft has vanished. Panic sets in as a low growl comes from behind her. She faces it with her sword ready but sees nothing through the darkness. Then, she hears it coming not just from in front of her, but all sides. Whatever it is, it is closing in on her. Enny’s only option is to fight until she can find the next path down. She throws three bombs, one in front of her and one to each side. She sprints in the opposite direction, leaving a trail of bombs behind her. With each explosion, she hears the creatures scream, but not in pain. They scream in hunger and anger. They are going to tear her apart and eat her while she is still alive, just like the one she heard before. 

She plans to just run, leaving bombs behind her. But the first problem is, she doesn’t even know where to run to. She can’t see more than 5 feet in front of her at a time and doesn’t want to risk running headfirst into whatever is chasing her. The second problem is, she only has 6 bombs left. But before either of those can matter, something catches her leg from behind. NO she thinks. How could they possibly have caught up to her so quickly? It is as if the bombs didn’t even faze it. She turns around and kicks it as hard as she can, landing a blow with her free leg right on the creature’s face. Once free, she sees it clearly in the light. It is three times her size, scales instead of skin, spikes running down its back, claws and teeth dripping with blood, and red eyes that bore into her soul. She scrambles to get up, but her leg won’t move. She looks down and it is mangled beyond recognition. She can’t even tell if she still has a leg under the exposed, shattered bone tearing through blood-soaked pants. Just then the creature lunges towards her. She grabs her galaxy sword and barely manages to use it to block the jaws of the creature as it crashes down on her. The weight of the monster crushes her, she can’t breathe. She holds the beast back with her blade, using her non-dominant hand to prop it up. She hears bone after bone break inside of her as the sword digs deeper into her own hand. She looks at the dark violet metal in the beast's bite and sees cracks quickly forming. It won’t be able to withstand this attack much longer. With the sword in her right hand, she lets go of the left side and uses her shoulder to hold it in place. It slices into her arm and chest and she cries out in pain. She can’t waste this moment and reaches for the dagger at her side. She feels its familiar hilt and quickly thrusts it into the neck of the creature repeatedly. The creature claws at her in desperation, ripping her chest apart and clamping down on her sword harder. She screams with every piece of skin and muscle it tears from her body. She feels the blade weaken until it shatters in a blinding light under its teeth, but she doesn’t relent.

The beast slows its assault, blood gushing from its neck onto Enny’s exposed chest, mixed with shards of her blade. It sears her open flesh, she can’t breathe, can’t move. All she can do is cry as her world begins to fade around her. Her hand rests on the pocket holding her family’s picture. She pictures the image again, trying only to focus on them, knowing she isn’t leaving this cave. She knows she will never again see her husband’s smile or hear her daughter’s laugh. All she can do is live in her own memory with them until death takes her. Until the memory fades to black.

Until she wakes from the jostling of the bus. Wait…the bus? 

She pushes through the fog in her head and forces herself to look around. She first sees the polyester seats stained with something black. Next to her is a window looking out over a valley of blossoming trees. No she thinks, it’s fall . Everything is supposed to be dying in the valley. How did she even end up on the bus? She has been fished out of the caves before, but she is always greeted by a familiar face not left alone on the bus. She tries to remember how she got there and suddenly her hand flies to the pocket with the picture of her family. She digs into it, but there’s no picture. In fact, these aren’t even the same pants. She is in a pair of shorts she hasn’t seen in years. Who changed her? Then, she sees her leg completely intact, but different, thinner than normal. She clutches her chest, remembering the pain of the creature’s claws tearing through her. Again, nothing there. “What is happening?” She mutters to herself. She scans the bus and realizes this isn’t the one that runs between the desert and the valley. This is a regional bus, much like the one she took when she first came here to escape her life in the city. She stands to approach the driver, but immediately stumbles forward, falling to the floor. She tries to push herself up, but her arms and legs feel so weak. She feels weak. 

Just then, the bus screeches to a jagged halt and the driver’s booming voice echoes through the bus, “Last stop, time to get off.”

Seems unnecessary to yell when I’m the only here, she thinks angrily. What an ass. She manages to push her body up and grab onto the nearby seat. She pulls herself the rest of the way up and uses the seats to support her as she walks to the front of the bus, apparently too slowly as the driver tells her to hurry up. She glares at him as she walks past, sure to walk as slowly as possible. His annoyance is visible and palpable, causing the corner of her lips to rise slightly. 

She tentatively steps down the stairs, careful to hold onto the rail for extra support. Why don’t these legs feel like mine ? Upon getting off the bus, she is met by a comforting red-haired woman. 

“Robin,” she breathes out heavily in relief, “I’m so happy you’re here.” Her emotions of the encounter in the cave bubble up into her chest and throat. Tears prick at her eyes, and she steps forward pulling the older woman into a hug.

 “Umm….you’re Enny right?” She asks somewhat nervously.

“Who else would I be?” Enny lets out an awkward laugh. It is then she feels the tension of the woman she is hugging, instead of being met with the same enthusiasm. “Robin? What’s going on?” her voice becomes more serious.

“I was going to ask you the same thing,” she lets out a small chuckle. “I didn’t expect someone from the city to be a hugger.” Embarrassed, Enny pulls away. She looks at Robin’s face, but something is wrong. The woman is missing the deeper wrinkles at the corners of her eyes. They are very shallow, in the beginning phases of depth. 

“Robin, I don’t understand. What’s happening? The last thing I remember was being in the caves and…well…I was attacked.” Enny feels guilty at her admission. “Next thing I knew, I was on the bus. I have no idea who even put me on it and my injuries are gone.” At this point, her words come out rushed. 

“What are you talking about? What caves?” Robin’s confusion written on her face.

“Robin, what’s going on? You’re acting like you don’t know me at all.” She laughs nervously, while that familiar knot forms in her stomach. 

“Enny, I don’t know you, at least not really. Everyone knows you arrived today and the mayor sent me to pick you up, but that’s it. I haven’t seen you since you were a child. You said you were attacked? Are you okay? I think we should go see the town doctor.”

Okay, something clearly happened to either Enny or Robin. She isn’t sure who, so she decides it’s best to go home. That would be the only way to get some answers. What happened while she was gone? She needs to see Sebastian. He could set things right. If anything, she just wants his comforting presence. Oh shit she thinks, he was up with Izzy waiting for me. It’s clearly daytime, which means they’ll be worried about her.

“No, I don’t need to see Harvey. I need to get home to Sebastian and Izzy. I didn’t come home last night, and he probably thinks I’m dead. Although, I’m starting to think that too…” her voice trails off.

“Why would Sebastian be at your house?” Concern in her voice. “And who is Izzy?”

Who is Izzy? How could this woman forget her own grandbaby? Why is the woman suddenly so distant, denying their relationship? Wait. The bus, the trees, her own body. Something’s wrong. Panic fills Enny’s body and she becomes dizzy, the world spinning. Her vision fades and the last thing she hears is Robin screaming something with worry etched into her face before she feels the hardness of the ground.

Chapter Text

Enny steps off that dirty regional bus, throwing some shade towards the driver on her way out. Despite being the only one on that bus, he acted like she was a nuisance to imaginary passengers the entire way. He wouldn’t stow her luggage then yelled at her for trying to sit in the handicapped area. What else was she supposed to do? She has two large duffels and couldn’t fit them with her in the regular seats. When he made it clear he wouldn’t leave until she moved, she begrudgingly moved to another seat. She was sure to be loud about it and throw her bags into 2 seats of their own. He tried to pierce her with his glare, but finally conceded, probably too afraid of running late. He deserved every nasty look she gave him.

Immediately, she feels the difference in the valley. The sun shines brightly and bathes the clearing before her in a warm light. She didn’t know a bus stop could be so beautiful. Lush bushes and tall trees border the field. She can hear life around her, replacing the sounds of cars and people shuffling on the street. The birds sing softly, and she hears the rhythmic sound of a woodpecker on a nearby maple tree. She simultaneously feels completely out of her element and like she found where she was always meant to belong. 

Just then, she hears someone clear their throat.

“Admiring the beauty?” Comes a soft, but firm voice from a copper haired woman. She exudes confidence and her presence feels comfortable. Enny doesn’t generally like people, let alone their company. This initial feeling is odd, to say the least. “My name is Robin. You’re Enny, right? Mayor Lewis asked me to pick you up and take you to the farm.” 

Somewhat reluctantly, Enny steps forward, the previous comfort leaving her body. Definitely still anxious around people, she thinks to herself.

“You’ve grown up quite a bit since the last time I saw you,” Robin effortlessly speaks while leading her down the path. Enny tries to remember the woman walking next to her, but is at a loss. “You probably don’t remember me,” she seems to sense Enny's lapse in memory. “You were still pretty young.”

“I’m sorry,” she says weakly, unsure of how to respond. She was 7 the last time she came here. She has brief glimpses of cornfields, her grandpa laughing, and a woman with white hair in a pony tail bobbing back and forth, but nothing more. She wonders who the woman was, but again is at a loss.

Enny groans as she wakes up. What a strange dream to have. She hasn’t thought about that first day in such a long time. She’s surprised to have dreamt it so vividly. Then there was that weird dream before it. That was just a dream, right? She slowly sits up and realizes she is in her cabin, or is she? As she looks harder, she sees a large window where the fireplace should be. Is this still a dream? She stumbles out of bed and immediately falls to the floor, feeling so weak. What is going on with me? And where are Sebastian and Izzy? Her cabin feels too small and dark as she climbs to her feet and stumbles around looking for the light switch. It’s not here? None of this makes any sense. She feels what she assumes is the door frame and reaches for the knob. She opens it to be met with the low glow of the end of a sunrise. Her eyes adjust and settle on the sight before her. Her farm spreads out before her, in complete ruins. Her once lush fields of crops have been replaced by boulders and overgrown weeds so thick you can’t walk through them. The greenhouse is barely recognizable by the pile of rubble next to her home, but the most shocking part, the once tall and vibrant forest has been replaced by a scar on her land. Filled with….water? What happened to her home? Where are Sebastian and Izzy? Her head rushes and that’s when she notices the mailbox flag up.

She hesitantly walks over and takes out a letter and… a bill ?

“Enny,

Robin dropped you off at the clinic. You passed out, I assume from exhaustion. Try to take better care of yourself.

I’ve billed you 1000g to cover your medical expenses.

-Dr. Harvey”

This is a joke. It has to be. She quickly takes off for the mountain path that she hopes is still behind her home. She sprints towards Robin’s cabin. She has to find Sebastian. She barely makes it halfway when her legs begin to retaliate. She’s run further and faster than this before, so why is her body so sluggish now? The sharp pain in her side forces her to slow to a fast walk, but she can’t stop. She has to find him, to find Izzy. She clings to the hope that this is just some weird joke, but a gnawing feeling in her stomach tells her it isn’t. 

She finally makes it up the mountain to a small clearing. She looks around and notices the road to the tracks is blocked off. Weird. Like everything else. The forest before her looks mostly like she remembers, only a little off. It is hard to tell now that night fully blankets the sky, too dark to see much more than the outlines of the trees. She finds the rarely used path that leads to Robin’s house and heads down it, but stops when she hears yelling. Is that Demetrius? 

Enny’s body surges with fury as she races towards the cabin, but just before she gets there, Sebastian comes running out. She stands there in disbelief as she looks at him in the glow of the porch light. The man running from the cabin looks wrong. That isn’t him, is it?

It takes Enny a moment for her mind to catch back up to her as Sebastian runs from the house. Her feet react first and she barely registers that she is running again, slowing down only as she reaches the trees. It is difficult to tell where he went, but she guesses he might be at his familiar spot by the lake. She gets turned around in these less familiar woods and can’t figure out where the lake is. That’s when she hears him scream. She sprints in the direction and clears the tree line, finding him on all fours hyperventilating. He falls to his side crashing hard onto the unforgiving ground. 

She runs to him screaming, “Sebastian! Are you okay?!” She crouches over him looking for consciousness. “You’re having a panic attack. I need you to breathe!” She grabs him and pulls him into her chest, trying to hold back her tears. Please, please be okay.

“Sebby, it’s time for dinner!” Robin calls down the stairs. A knot forms in Sebastian’s stomach. He dreads dinner. At best, he sits through a quiet meal where Demetrius doesn’t talk to him. At worst, Demetrius will berate and yell at him until Sebastian retreats to his room to pretend his words don’t deeply wound him.

It wasn’t always this way. A young Sebastian would eagerly rush to the dinner table to talk to his mom and stepdad. He loved to hear about their days and what they did. He grew up with his mom’s woodworking and knew more than he wanted to know about the different types of wood and their best uses. When Demetrius was around, he would talk about this entire other world that Sebastian had no idea existed. He talked about plants with passion, about their chemical properties and Sebastian was astonished by the reactions happening at a microscopic level. He remembers the first time Demetrius let him look through his microscope. Sebastian felt in awe of what he saw. 

“How are those there??” 6-year-old Sebastian practically screams. “They look like little bugs. Do we all have little bugs in us??” Sebastian seems mildly alarmed and almost hopeful. Demetrius lets out a big belly laugh at his statement. Sebastian loves his laugh. It fills the room with joy and over time it begins to fill the hole in Sebastian’s heart that his own dad had left. 

Slowly, things began to change. Once Demetrius moved in, there were fewer laughs. Demetrius literally brought his work home blurring the line between personal and professional life until it no longer existed. Demetrius was constantly working and would become irritated easily with Sebastian when he asked questions about his work.

Demetrius would often let out a long sigh, followed by a “I’ll spare you the details, for your sake and mine.” 

Sebastian tried to spend more time with his mom to fill that hole inside once again. More and more she would go out with Demetrius to the saloon or for walks. They’d be gone for hours, not returning until well after Sebastian would fall asleep. He remembers crying to his mom, begging to go with them. After that, she brought him a couple of times, until Demetrius complained it was taking away from their time as a couple. Again, Sebastian was left at home.

Once Maru was born, Demetrius stopped trying to connect with Sebastian and focused all his energy on his new family. 

Sebastian finishes the line he was coding and turns off his computer. He doesn’t expect he will be able to work anymore after dinner. He grabs his cigarettes and hoodie before ascending the cold stairwell. He slowly walks down the hall, a sense of dread building up in his stomach. He feels his heart pounding, desperate to break free from his chest. His breathing becomes shallow, and the hall fuzzy. His head starts to spin. He reaches out for the wall and tries to memorize every indent and grain of the wood. It feels smooth along his fingertips. He traces the lines of the wood up until his fingers find a knot. It is much darker than the reddish hue of the rest of the mahogany. The outer swirls blend into this black hole of the wood and he wonders if there is an entire world living in that astronomical knot. 

He looks around the dimly lit, empty hall, hearing voices come from the kitchen. They sound far away but he forces himself to focus on the sounds of his mother laughing. He inhales for 4 seconds, holds it, then exhales for 8. He repeated this routine 3 more times. His body falls into this pattern easily as he has been practicing for years. He is still amazed how effective it is after all this time, stopping about 90% of his panic attacks. 

Once he can breathe normally, he straightens himself up and lets go of the wall. He continues his breathing as he walks down the hall, the kitchen coming into view. Robin, Demetrius, and Maru sit at the table eating and smiling. Once Demetrius makes eye contact with Sebastian, his smile falls. He looks down at his food, grabbing another fork of spaghetti.

“Only 10 minutes late today, I see you’re improving.” All the warmth in Demetrius’ voice is gone, now mechanical and monotone. He feels a surge of panic at his words, a type of internal flinching. 

“Sebby, I’m so happy to see you here,” Robin quickly chimes in. “I know you’re always so busy. What are you working on right now?”

“Uh,” Sebastian struggles to get the words out as he grabs a plate of food. “It’s for an app developer.”

“Apps.” Demetrius huffs out frustratingly. “What a waste of work. You should find reputable and consistent work for an actual company. Although, I’m sure that’s hard when you didn’t even finish college.” He finally looks up from his food and over to Maru, his voice softens only slightly. “Don’t worry honey, you’ll finish your program and find a great job.” Maru visibly stiffens. Her fork stops in the air and makes its way back down to the plate. 

“Thanks, dad.” She offers a weak smile.

It must be hard being believed in and loved so much. He knows that she’ll be given all the support and resources she needs to get through school. He’s pretty sure that Demetrius would shove his arm up her ass and use her as a puppet to get her to graduate. She won’t have to worry about where she will live or about being smart enough. She won’t have to worry about crippling mental health getting in her way. 

Stop. Breathe. He reminds himself that he isn’t Maru, it’s not fair to compare the two to each other. He accepted a long time ago that she will be better than him, more successful than him, and more loved than him. Remember your place. Remember hers. She’s capable of great things, he’s capable of terrible things. He tries to focus on his plate, picking at the noodles with his fork and focusing on the smell of garlic wafting from the sauce. He loves garlic. 

“This spaghetti is great dear,” Demetrius praises Robin. “I swear it gets better every time.”

“It’s the garlic,” Robin beams. “I roasted it instead of using the jar in the fridge.” She loves food and she loves to cook when she can find the time. She puts as much thought and care into cooking as she does into her woodworking. 

“Mom, it's really great,” says Maru, once again wearing that weak smile.

“Sebastian, don’t you like your mom’s spaghetti,” Demetrius demands more than asks. 

“Um, yeah mom, it’s really good. Thanks,” Sebastian struggles to get the words out. The room suddenly feels heavy.

“Thanks, Sebby,” Robin says, flashing him a genuine smile. Not just for the compliment, but for his presence. 

They continue like that for the next 20 minutes. Demetrius dotes on Maru while occasionally slipping in demeaning comments to Sebastian. He wants to run away back to his room, out of the house, anywhere he can, but he stays at the table, afraid to leave too early for fear of how Demetrius will react. Suddenly, an alarm sounds from the lab.

“Ah, I have to go check on my experiment,” Demetrius excitedly exclaims. “I’ve been waiting for these results all day.”

“Okay, honey,” Robin smiles. “Are you done eating? I can clean up your plate.”

“I believe so, I’ll see you when I’m done for our walk,” he replies. He quickly leaves the room but stops at the doorway. “Maru, let’s go.” 

“Oh, right. Thanks for dinner mom. I can clean up when I’m done,” she says. “If that’s okay.”

“Don’t worry about it sweetie, I can get it for you,” Robin wears such a proud motherly smile. She loves to see her daughter take such an interest in Demetrius’ work. 

With that, Maru and Demetrius disappear down the hall, leaving Sebastian and Robin alone in the kitchen. It is unexpected, but suddenly Sebastian feels a spark of joy to have a moment alone with his mom. She seems to reciprocate the feeling when she speaks.

“Sebby, have you met the new farmer yet?” She asks.

“No, and Sam won’t shut up about her,” he replies.

“She has a lot of work on that farm. To be honest, I don't get the impression she can do it. Still, I'm excited to have some new projects.” Robin always loved new people as they came with new projects for her to dream up.

“I’m sure I’ll see her at some point, hopefully not too soon.” Sebastian hates meeting new people.

“There’s no rush, Sebby. I know how hard it is for you to talk to new people,” Robin says with sympathy and understanding. Sebastian loves it when someone understands him without much explanation. Despite their diminishing relationship, she still seems to see him.

They continue like this. Sebastian talks about his work, friends, and even a little bit about the speckled frog he saw the other day. Robin listens with all the attention in the world, her genuine interest never faltering. He asks her about the new projects, and she excitedly tells him about some hardwood trees on the farm she can’t wait to use. Robin begins cleaning the dirty dishes and Sebastian picks up a towel to dry them and put away. They fall into an easy and comfortable rhythm with only the sounds of the water. 

That peace is suddenly shattered when Demetrius comes shouting into the kitchen. “Are you ready to go? Oh, Sebastian, I didn’t expect to see you up here still. You usually rush out after dinner.”

“Sebby and I were just catching up,” Robin beams. She clearly loves their time together too. 

“I understand, but really, he doesn’t need to stay up here after dinner. That’s our time,” Demetrius replies coldly.

“You were in the lab with Maru, it’s not a big deal,” Robin says, almost defensively. Sebastian hates that they are talking about him like he isn’t there. 

“Why does it matter if I stayed up here to talk to my mom?” His voice quivers with hostility and fear.

“Look Sebastian, you have everything you need downstairs, a computer, a TV, a bathroom. I don’t see why you need to be up here,” Demetrius’ own more subtle frustration begins to show.

“Maybe I just want to be up here.” Sebastian practically begs.

“Maybe you’re not wanted up here,” It slips out of Demetrius too quickly leaving Robin and Sebastian both stunned for a moment. He sighs, trying to recollect his composure. “Just go back downstairs. It’s where you belong.”

“Where I belong?!” Sebastian shouts, unable to hold back his anger. “I’m not something you just keep put away in the basement. This is my home too and I want to feel like I’m a part of it.”

“If you’re not happy in the basement, then leave. No one is forcing you to stay here.” The way Demetrius shouts forcing sends chills down Sebastian’s spine. He is being forced, isn’t he? It doesn’t matter. He turns to his mom for help, but she just looks blankly at him.

“Mom please, tell me I’m wanted,” he begs with tears forming in his eyes. “Please.”

“Sebby…I, of course I want you,” she says tentatively, “but…”

“But what?!” He cuts her off. “But you’d rather shove me out of this family like him?”

“No, of course not,” she turns to Demetrius. “He doesn’t really need to leave, does he?”

“Robin, he doesn’t contribute anything to this family. He only hurts it. He’s always coming in late and loud, waking us up. He only has negative things to say, and he’s constantly surrounded by a cloud of smoke. It’s disgusting. We can’t have that around Maru,” the first real hint of concern in his voice.

“There it is,” Sebastian seethes, “it’s always about your precious little Maru. Perfect in every way. She’s the shining star of the family, while I’m just a festering sore you need to get rid of.”

“Sebastian!” Robin cuts in. “That’s no way to speak to him.”

Sebastian feels his heart break. “You defend him, but not me?” 

Without another word, he rushes out of the kitchen and out of the house. He can hear his mom trying to say something but he doesn't care. As soon as he is through the front door, he runs. He can’t think, he just needs to get away from what happened, from the growing hole in his chest. He runs through the forest, the branches whipping him in the face. He feels only the barest sting with each one. Finally, the trees open up and he collapses to the ground. He stares at the dirt under his hands as his vision blurs, tears fall and quickly pool on the ground. He screams into the Earth itself.

He stays like that for a few minutes before finally lifting his head to look over the lake shimmering under the full moon in front of him. The still water feels like a personal attack against his inner turmoil. He can never touch such calmness. He can only skip across the surface until he finally sinks. That tragic reality fills him with dread. He means nothing to the world. I am nothing. His chest tightens and suddenly his breathing feels too shallow. It can’t keep up and he begins to see spots. He tries to take a deep breath in, but his lungs reject the air. He can’t breathe. Panic seizes his body. This is it. Will anyone really care? His hearing dulls and he falls to his side. He feels the cold hard ground crash into his ribs, but he doesn’t care. He just lays there waiting for his world to go black. Wait, what was that? He thinks he hears a muffled sound coming from the trees. For a moment the world becomes clearer, only to darken just as quickly.

“Seb…!…okay?!” The words pierce through the fog in his head. “You’re….……attack.” What is that voice trying to say? Why do they sound so worried? “I need…..breathe!” Suddenly, he feels pressure on his back and his upper body lifts off the ground. He crashes into something, no someone, while the pressure grows stronger around him. “Sebastian, I need you to hear me. Focus on me. Feel my breathing.” The voice becomes clearer and with it his mind begins to pull him back into the world. Who is this? How do they know my name? He feels the rise and fall of their chest into his own, exposing how erratic his own breathing is by how his chest convulses into theirs. He listens to the voice and tries to feel their breath. Slowly, his body responds and begins to fall into rhythm with it. Wait, this is working? After what feels like an eternity, they, no she , speaks.

“Good, that’s really good. Do you hear the crickets?” Crickets? Then he hears them coming from all around him. 

“Y-y-yeah,” he manages to croak out.

“What else do you hear?” She asks. 

He focuses for a moment before responding.

“Frogs, I can hear the frogs.” His vision begins to return, and he sees where he is. He’s at the edge of the lake, in the arms of this woman. Startled, he pushes himself back from her and stares. It is dark, but her unforgettable eyes look into his soul like they know every detail of it. It feels familiar somehow. He swears he’s seen her before. Seen those eyes,  now they are full of tears and fear. Are those tears for me?

“Who are you?” He fears her answer, unsure why.

“You really don’t remember me?” Tears silently fall down her face. “Please, I need you to remember,” she pleads. Her voice breaks as she speaks those words. “Please.”

Something in the way she says please tugs at Sebastian’s heart. It pains him to see her this way. He reaches as deep as he can into his memory, but all he sees is fragments of her face in the shadows of his mind.

“I don’t,” he whispers, “remember you that is.” He looks at the ground, ashamed. Again, why? Why don’t I want to disappoint her? An uncomfortable silence falls over them.

“Okay,” she says, trying to regain her composure. “How are you feeling?”

He thinks for a moment, feeling a pain in his ribs. “I think I’m okay. I fell, I think, but that’s it.”

“That’s not what I mean. You had a panic attack. It looked like a really bad one. You were hyperventilating. I thought you were going to pass out.” 

“I get them sometimes. They’re not usually this bad.” He wants to change the subject. “What are you doing out here? Who are you?”

“Oh, um, my name’s Enny,” she says weakly. “I was out walking and heard screaming coming from the lake. I ran over and found you lying on the ground.”

“And you didn’t get lost out here? Not a lot of people come out to these woods.” He questions.

“I guess I just have a good sense of direction,” she says sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head. “To be fair, that scream was pretty easy to follow.” Sebastian’s face heats up at that comment. 

“I didn’t ask for your help,” he snaps defensively.

“Oh, okay, I’m sorry.” Enny turns her face away, almost hurt. 

It is quiet for a minute before Sebastian speaks. “You don’t have to stay here. I’m fine now.” But…I want you to stay. 

“Y-yeah right,” she stutters. “Are you sure? I’m happy to stay a bit.”

“It’s fine really,” he lies.

“Okay, um, bye then I guess.” Why is she so disappointed? Is she just worried about some stranger? That has to be it. Wait.

“How did you know my name?” He asks.

“Oh, well I guess I’ve just heard around and assumed it was you.” She says like she’s caught doing something wrong. What’s with this girl? Sebastian shakily pulls himself up on his feet and brushes off his pants. She gets up with him. “Okay, I’ll see you around.”

“Right, around,” he mutters. With that she turns and slowly begins to walk, as if she is waiting for something, but it’s probably just in his head. He’s looking for something that isn’t there. Why do I want her to stay so badly ? He stares at her back until she disappears in the trees,  never looking back, even though he hoped she would. 

That familiar pain in his chest aches to remind him it is there. He didn’t even realize it had given him a reprieve. Weird. Everything about tonight has been weird. He thinks it best not to go towards the lake after the panic it caused before. Instead he makes his way through the woods towards the train tracks. He knows he can’t reach them because of the road being caved in, but it is one of the few hopes he holds onto. One day, it will be cleared, and he can listen to the trains pass by.

After that, he keeps walking until he finds himself by the run-down community center. He walks around to the back where one of the windows has been long since broken out. He slips in and finds his familiar spot by the hut in the corner of the main room. He doesn’t know why, but he always feels some sort of life coming from it, even though it’s empty. One day it wasn’t there, the next it was. He looks at it and the face of the farmer flashes across his mind. Why am I thinking about her? He shakes himself from his thoughts and proceeds to sit between the hut and the wall. He had the sense to grab some of the cushions from the worn down couch and stashed them back there. He settles in and pulls out a cigarette. The familiar burn comforts him. It hurts, but in a way that he has come to love. It’s consistent, never changing. It doesn’t say anything, just letting him sit in silence. Finally, he snubs out the butt and pockets it. He rests his head against the wall and drifts off to sleep. The last thing he remembers seeing are those dark eyes shining in the light of the moon.

“You’re not wanted up here!” Demetrius’ words send a jolt through Maru’s body. She sits frozen in fear on her bed, waiting for the fighting to stop. She tries to block out the yelling, but it grips her tightly until she feels like her chest will collapse in on itself. She doesn’t know how long it lasts but the slamming of a door makes her jump in fear. 

“Robin, he’s ungrateful and a leech on this house,” she can hear her father scream. “When are you going to see that? He needs to go before he tears this family apart.” It’s silent after that. She can’t hear what her mom has to say, but she guesses she gives in to whatever her dad has to say. She usually does. 

Maru thinks about dinner. How her brother looked at her with all the hate of the world in his eyes. She can’t blame him. Demetrius tears him down every chance he gets and uses her to justify it. She hates it, but she is too afraid to say anything. She tries to speak, but her throat always tightens. No sound can ever escape her lips. All night she wanted to scream. Just another experience to add to the lifetime of regrets she carries. 

Demetrius makes her work in his lab every free moment she has. She only gets to leave the house when she’s working at the clinic or he’s out with Robin. He controls every part of her life. 

“You need to be eating healthier food to stay sharp. No caffeine, it just rots your brain and creates a dependency. You don’t want to end up like Sebastian do you?” Or, “Don’t get distracted by boys in town. You have a future and they’ll just hold you back.” And of course, he dictates when she eats, sleeps, and who she can talk to. Penny is her only approved friend and even that was a battle. “She seems like a nice girl, but she carries the baggage of her mother. I don’t want you to get caught up with an alcoholic like that.” Their compromise is that she can meet her outside on the bench. 

Maru feels so alone, her life controlled by her dad, her mom too distracted with work to notice, and her brother who can’t stand the sight of her. She spent so many nights crying herself to sleep, but those days are long since over. Her tears dried and replaced with fear. Fear of Demetrius. He is so angry and so mean towards Sebastian, and she is too weak and too scared to speak up for him. She’s afraid he’ll direct his rage towards her. Occasionally, his anger slips out towards her, usually when she makes a mistake in the lab or is slightly past her curfew. His voice becomes hard, and she can see his jaw clench as he grinds his teeth. He restrains himself from lashing out, but she has seen that control fade over time. When will it be her instead of Sebastian? What will happen when he leaves? Will it get better? Or will all that hostility be directed at her? 

Maru lays on her bed clutching her pillow until exhaustion overcomes her.

Enny turns away from Sebastian in a haze. She walks into the tree line, oblivious to her surroundings until she trips over a root and falls onto the ground. He doesn’t remember me. As The world crashes down on her, tears pour from her eyes, and sobs tear her throat apart. She grabs her chest tightly as it rips open once again. She can feel the phantom pain of her attack amplified by this loss. 

She held out hope that some part of him knew who she was. He has to remember her, to remember Izzy. Oh god. Izzy. Everything is wrong and she isn’t here. I don’t even know where here is. That gnawing feeling that something is terribly wrong creeps back up. Everything is wrong, the farm, Robin, Sebastian, all of it. That is when she knew she died in that cave. She died and was sent here. But why? As a punishment? To watch her life be torn away from her? The wizard talked about other worlds. This has to be another world. My real one is waiting for me somewhere and I have to find it. 

The loss of their daughter and the loss of Sebastian take everything from her. What is left? She is truly alone in this world having lost her family and farm. Everything important to her is gone. She spent years putting her life back together only to have it ripped away again, except this time, she doesn’t think she can build a new one. These wounds are too deep.

So, she cries on that forest floor until the pain transforms into something else. Something fueled by hatred and loss. She feels rage against that beast who took her life from her. At that moment, she knows what she has to do. She will find that creature and take her life back. It will feel her pain a thousand-fold. 

Enny pulls herself up and makes her way back down the mountain towards the broken farm. Hopefully rasmodius' tower is still in the western woods by the cliffs and there is still a path through the farm. The walk down is easier, but it gives her too much time to feel the pain in her legs and chest. She keeps seeing Sebastian, no that's not Sebastian, not mine at least. 

When she reaches the farm, she works her way towards the south through the weeds. The weeds are massive and abundant, some coming up to her chest. She forces her way through them until she comes upon a small path. Odd. Someone's been out here often enough to make this. She follows it until the weeds thin, dumping her out on a beach. Enny is in disbelief of the sight before her. She looks out over the water before her and gasps when she realizes it isn’t just water, it’s an entire ocean pouring in from the south. The gentle waves continue until they blend into the southern horizon. Stars speckle the sky, lighting up the beach to the left and right over her. She breathes in the softness of the ocean and quiet of the night. Relief floods into her lungs, through her chest, outward into her arms and legs. 

Enny stands at the edge of the water, eyes fixed on the endless expanse and lets the calmness take over her body. Her mind drifts to images of Sebastian, her Sebastian, and Izzy when they all went to the beach late one night to watch the stars. 

Izzy learned about the big dipper and how it dips below the horizon only to come up a few hours later. She didn’t quite understand the circular motion of the stars, but they encouraged her to experience it herself. She walks out her bedroom door bundled as if they are going into a snowstorm. She carries a sketchpad and a box of colored pencils. Sebastian and Enny can’t contain their laughter at the determination on her face. 

“Mama! Papa! This is serious business.” She exclaims. “There’s nothing funny about it.” Of course, that only makes them laugh more. 

“Have you seen my hot cocoa?” She asks. That is when we both doubled over with laughter and wrap her in a giant hug. When they arrive at the beach, she immediately sets up her little workstation. She brought a little flashlight and begins sketching what she sees in the sky. She stays up for hours before finally falling asleep with her blue colored pencil in hand. Sebastian scoops her up while Enny grabs their things. It’s a slow walk back, but the silence between them feels warm.

That warmth radiates through her body now, but slowly the cold reality creeps back in. The wind bites her cheeks and she realizes she is crying. So, she turns away from the water and makes her way south along the beach. The path diverges from the beach, and she finds herself in a familiar wood along a familiar house, Marnie’s house. She turns into the woods and walks until an ominous tower comes into view. Thank Yoba. He’s here. If anyone can help her, it will be this man. She quickly takes the stairs two at a time, tripping on the last set. She falls into the door but uses her momentum to pound on it. 

“Rasmodius!” She calls out. “Open up!” After a minute of knocking and yelling, she presses her ear to the door hearing nothing. She looks up at the windows and sees no lights. He has to be here. It is late enough that she knew the only place he’d be is at home. With tears streaming down her face she begins pounding the door harder.

“Please, Ras, I need you. I need to go home.” Her voice breaks. She finally lets herself slide to the ground where she continues to weep. What do I do now? She sits there crying into her hands until the tears dry, and exhaustion takes over her body.

Chapter Text

Enny’s jaw drops when the farm comes into view. She didn’t realize just how bad it would be. Weeds everywhere, overgrown and fallen trees, boulders larger than her. Her vision spots and she suddenly can’t feel her arms or legs. How can I possibly farm on this? She thinks. She already feels overwhelmed by learning to farm, but this is beyond her abilities. She doesn’t even think she physically can clear this land.

Just breathe. Deep breath in, hold it, long breath out. She doesn’t hear a word that Robin or Mayor Lewis say, and after they leave, Enny falls to the floor inside the cabin. What was I thinking? I don’t belong here. Enny wants to leave, to run away, but she can’t go back to the city. With no place left to go, she climbs to her feet.

Looking around, she takes in every detail of the cabin. Immediately, she notices the obnoxiously bright green, floral wallpaper. I really hope I can tear that down or cover it up. It is far too colorful for her muted personality. Her eyes drift to the TV next to the wall. Its bulky, box shape juts out from the wall and looks about as bad as the wallpaper, but it feels more relatable, being used and thrown aside. Near the TV sits a worn, wooden table with two decrepit-looking chairs. Will those even hold me up? I’ll probably fall right through them. On the table rests a cute little potted plant. Small, but big spirit. It’s fighting the confines of its cage and needs room to grow. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you a new pot as soon as I can,” she says to the plant. “You need a name. You look like a Phillip. My name’s Enny. I promise I’ll try not to kill you .”

The last thing she sees is a small bed tucked away in the corner. I wonder how long that bedding has been there. She touches the comforter only to find that it feels clean and fluffy, like it is brand new. Huh, I’ll have to ask Robin about that later. She finishes looking around the small room when she realizes. Where’s the kitchen? Good Yoba, where is the kitchen?? With that, Enny loudly groans until she sees a small box. She opens it to find some seeds, old farm tools, and a note from the mayor. They are just giving me these things? I wonder what they want in return. Years of manipulation made her wary of the “kindness” of people. 

She tries to shake off that poisonous feeling eating away at her and grabs the tools. She heads for the door and steps out onto her porch. It looks about as worn down as the inside of her home, but she just takes it all in. This land stretches further than she imagined. She still feels that dread in her chest, but there is something else there too. It is small, but a faint flutter of excitement flourishes. She really can’t remember the last time she felt this way. She closes her eyes and focuses on that feeling for a moment. With a new determination, she opens them and sets out to inspect the land, her land. This will be hard, but she knows hard.

Enny shoots up out of bed only to be met with a piercing headache. Grabbing her head she thinks, what did I do? What is with these weird dreams lately? Then the memory of the previous day floods into her mind. She tries to scream, but her voice dies in her throat. The pain is too great to escape. Her body absorbs every ounce of it. It permeates her muscles, her bones. It settles so deeply that every part of her body seizes in anguish. Her breathing quickens and panic takes over. Breathe Enny. Deep breath in, hold it, long breath out. She continues until she regains control over her muscles. She takes the opportunity to jump out of bed. She knows the breathing won’t stop this panic attack on its own, but she just needs enough time so she can distract herself out of it. 

She looks around and immediately sees a box. It’s just like from my dream. Upon opening it, she finds the same contents she just dreamt of. Mortified, she backs away until bumping up against the door. She turns and practically tears it down to get out. She runs, tripping down the stairs. Her arms fly out to soften the fall, but the hard ground abruptly and unforgivingly crashes against her body and drives the air from her lungs. She struggles against her body to breathe, clawing at her chest. Slowly her diaphragm allows her to steal small breaths before returning to a more normal rhythm. She rolls onto her back and stares at the bright, blue sky above her. How can you shine like that while looking down on my pain? It seems cruel. 

After several more moments, Enny finds the strength to stand up once more. She needs to figure out this alien world if she wants to survive while she waits for the wizard. That damn wizard. Where is he? How long will he be gone? She vaguely recalls his tower being closed off when she first moved to the valley, but she can’t remember for how long. 

It is still early, the sun barely rising. She needs to check his tower again. He has to be there. She needs him to be there. She looks at her surroundings and once again that stupid mailbox has its flag up. 

“Enny,

Someone dropped you off at the clinic last night. You'd passed out from exhaustion again. You've really got to take better care of yourself and go to bed at a reasonable hour.

I've billed you 1000g to cover your medical expenses.

-Dr. Harvey”

Enny lets out a chuckle and rakes her hand through her hair. Why is this so funny? Maybe because my life feels like a joke right now. It isn’t a good laugh, but one from desperation. No, I won’t be trapped in this nightmare. She turns around and takes off towards the tower. She finds the path she took the previous night and runs as quickly as these pathetic legs will take her. She feels the sting of the weeds on her legs but pushes harder. When the path dumps her out on the beach, she doesn’t even glance at the water. She passes Marnie’s ranch and runs through the woods until she spots the wizard’s home. She quickly ascends the stairs only to be met once again with a seemingly empty building. Shit shit shit shit shit. 

She suddenly hears someone walking behind her. Enny quickly turns and is met with a very young, black-haired girl. Enny recognizes her immediately.

“Jas,” she breathes out, almost a whisper, “what are you doing this far into the woods?” Enny cannot get over just how young she is. She can’t be more than 10 years old. When she was thrust into this hell, Jas was in college. 

“……” no response from Jas.

“Jas, are you okay?” With that, the little girl turns around and sprints away, jumping rope in hand. 

“Jas, wait!” Enny calls, but she has already disappeared into the woods. Shit. She’s so little. How is she going to get back okay? Enny decides to follow her to make sure she gets home safely. Was she always allowed in the woods? Once again, Enny struggles to remember the details of her arrival in the valley. 

Enny attempts to chase her through the trees, taking the way that makes the most sense back to Marnie’s. While she runs, she thinks back to the Jas she knew. She was a quiet girl, who rarely talked to anyone in town. Enny had been told her parents died when she was younger and that she was still a livelier girl until her uncle died. After that, Jas shut down and retreated into herself. 

The town was surprised when she decided to go to college. She seemed too introverted to move to a large city full of people. But Enny knew about the anonymity that comes in a mass of people. One can be around countless faces and seen by none, simply hiding in plain sight. 

Enny is pulled from her thoughts as Marnie’s ranch comes into view. It looks identical to the one from her world with the large silo along the side and cows grazing behind the fence. She sees Jas run up to a gruff looking man and into his arms. Is that her uncle? She can’t remember this man, but her uncle did pass away shortly after she moved here. She had only met him once and he was hostile towards her. She quickly learned to avoid him. 

“Hey!” The man shouts. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Still hostile even here. “Do you get off by chasing girls through the woods? What kind of creep are you?” 

“I..I wasn’t chasing her, exactly,” Enny stammers. “I was deep in the woods when I saw her. I was afraid she would get lost out there.”

“So, you chased her like a damn psychopath?” Anger still very present in his voice. 

“I-I’m sorry, I promise I was just worried about her.” Enny says defensively, throwing up her hands in submission. 

“Go worry about that dump of a farm instead. Leave my family alone.” His tone is still bitter, but the anger simmers slightly. 

Confused, Enny backs away before turning and running up to the farm. Great. I’ve already been branded as a garbage human being. He’ll probably tell the whole town. Do I even care what they think? It’s not like I’m staying here long. Still, in the back of her mind, she knew. She does care.

Enny needs to clear her head. If she has to wait for the wizard, she needs to keep busy. That’s the only way to keep the panic at bay. After her run in with that man what was his name? She decides to avoid town. I guess I can look at this sad excuse of a farm. So, she walks around to inspect this overgrown and rundown piece of garbage. She comes up to the beach side and still can’t understand how it’s there. Maybe it’s an alternate reality where things are just slightly different. That could explain the ocean. As much as she hates the blemish on this farm, she finds a sense of ease looking out over the water.  

She decides to head west, away from the beach until she meets a small pond. It’s clearer than she expects, but she sees a layer of trash lining the bottom. Disgusting.  

She continues past the pond and passes by some high cliffs. Just north of them, she finds a scarcely wooded area. It is sad compared to the lush forest on her farm, but it invokes a feeling of nostalgia and longing. Enny clutches her chest and decides it will be better to skip this area for now. 

She backtracks towards the pond and heads north instead. Some of the weeds are thin and she finds there is only sand under them. How can they even grow on that? She walks along further until the west opens to more sand. She heads west again and walks alongside some more trees. She tries not to look in that direction, instead focusing on the appearing beach in front of her. Beaches on both sides? How though? Did it run up both sides? Or did it make a moat around her farm. 

Enny walks towards the beach and looks at the bright sky before her. The ocean shines back up to the sky, both radiating warmth and joy. A gentle breeze passes around her, tugging at some of her hair. Enny closes her eyes and breathes it in. The ocean is still a source of comfort. 

Reluctantly, she continues north until she finds what looks like a little peninsula. She follows it out into the sea and finds the remains of a greenhouse almost unrecognizable as a pile of rubble. I wonder if the Junimos exist here too. Maybe they can help me. She doesn’t have much hope they can, but it is worth a try. She decides to visit them later tonight, as she doesn’t want to risk running into anymore townspeople. 

She leaves the little peninsula and heads alongside the northern cliffs until she reaches a cavern. She slowly walks inside, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness. It’s empty. I guess Demetrius hasn’t set up his experiment yet. The thought of that man is enough to make Enny feel sick. She pushes those thoughts aside and exits the cave. She continues east until she finds the mountain path to her left and the cabin directly in front of her. 

She checks the time. Ugh, it’s only noon. What is she supposed to do? Waiting isn’t going to work. The panic creeps back in and she does the only thing she can. She grabs the tools from the cabin and gets to work. Tending her farm always brought a sense of calm and accomplishment that fed her soul. This might not be her farm, but maybe it can at least distract her. 

She starts with the scythe and hacks away the large weeds directly in front of the cabin. She bundles them together and moves onto the smaller logs with the rusted ax. These are a little harder for her as this weak body struggles with every swing. Enny knows her stamina will not last the entire day and needs to be smart about how she uses her energy. 

She sticks to clearing out a small area just big enough to sow the seeds gifted to her. She neatly stacks the wood and takes a break to craft a chest to store her materials. The chest construction goes quickly despite her weakened state. The memory of building countless chests in her world makes the process easy. 

Enny carefully places the remaining wood and weeds into the chest. She moves on to hoeing the cleared patch. Yoba, I’m so hot. It’s only spring, how am I this overheated? She feels sluggish. With the force of the final hoe coming down, she falls to her knees. Shadows and spots creep into the peripherals of her vision. She breathes through it until her vision returns to normal. 

I’m fucking pathetic. How is my body like this? Am I just inhabiting the body of this world’s Enny? What happened to her then? Is she buried inside of me just watching, unable to do anything? That’s a depressing thought. Maybe there’s two of us? Then where is she? It sounds like she was still on her way here. Enny has too many questions and too few answers. 

Regardless, she needs to take another break and probably eat something. She brings herself to her feet and walks towards the nearest trees. She finds some maple and acorn trees in the thick weeds near the cabin. She spots some acorns and saplings on the branches. She picks some from the lower ones that she can reach. She still needs pinecones and remembers seeing them in the woods she avoided earlier. She walks to the edge and quickly grabs just a few nearby. With her ingredients in tow, she heads back to the cabin.

She finds a flattish larger rock and a small rounded one. She uses them as a makeshift mortar and pestle. They don’t need to be ground too fine, just enough that the natural oils release and can bind them together. It’s not the most filling snack, but it’s enough to get her through planting and watering these parsnip seeds. 

She finishes watering the last seed as the sun disappears into the Earth. It’s dark enough to visit the Junimos. She cleans up a little and packs away her farm tools in the chest. Her body feels exhausted and responds minimally to her commands. Still, she leaves the farm and heads east towards the town. 

She is careful to avoid running into anyone. She goes slowly and sticks to the shadows. She travels down the path, passing the bus stop. It’s weird how this looks exactly the same while the farm is completely different. What will the town look like? But she doesn’t plan on getting close enough to check. When she finally reaches the northwest area of town, she sees the medical sign in front of Harvey’s, assuming it is still Harvey’s . 

She quickly ducks behind the building and up the stairs behind it. The playground still sits under the light glow of a lamp. Next to it sits the community center, the home of the Junimos. It looks terrible, just like in her world when she arrived. The windows are all boarded up, the siding falling off the exterior, and the heavily worn door. She walks up to the door and finds it’s locked. She yanks a little harder, but it’s sturdier than it looks. 

Now what? She walks around the decrepit building and inspects all the boarded windows, finding a loose one in the back. She pulls a little and it comes off easily. Enny carefully climbs inside taking care to be as quiet as possible. Looking around, she finds she is in a large room. It looks just like mine before the Junimos fixed it up. Which means…..yes! There it is! She finds the little dirt hut in the corner of the room. She slowly walks up to it and peers inside. It’s empty? Where are they?

Just then, she hears something behind her. Turning, she sees a shimmer of green dart across the room, disappearing into the hallway. 

“Wait!” She shouts. “Please come back.” Enny races to the hall but sees nothing. Hearing a quiet voice, she runs back to the main room. She sees fragments of color, but they all seem just out of sight. The Junimo magic. They’re hiding themselves from me.  

“Please, Junimos, I need your help,” she pleads from the center of the room towards no particular direction. “I don’t belong here. I’m trying to find a way home.”

After a long pause, the room says. "We know who you are, and we cannot help you.”

“You know me? The me of this world? Or the me of mine?” 

“We know you,” a different voice says. 

“What does that even mean?” Enny asks in a desperate voice. She is met with silence, the quiet chirpings gone. “Please, come back!” The room feels cold, and she knows they’re gone. She falls to her knees and cries. “I just want to go home.”

“What are you doing here?” A familiar voice comes from the side of the room with the open window. Enny looks towards the soft voice belonging to Sebastian with tears in her eyes. 

“Sebastian…” she trails off, the words dying in her throat. He looks away. In Enny’s world, he did that when he felt uncomfortable or embarrassed. Did he feel that way now? How similar are the two Sebastian’s to each other? 

After a long silence, Sebastian says. "Why do you look at me like that?”

“Like what?” It is barely above a whisper.

“Like you know me,” he replies. Enny doesn’t know what to say . Do I tell him the truth? Maybe he can help? Or maybe he’ll tell Harvey and they’ll have me committed. No, I need to wait to talk to the wizard. 

“I’m sorry. I guess you just remind me of someone else.” His face visibly morphs into a look of frustration.

“Okay, well it makes me feel weird, I guess,” his words don’t exactly match his face. Is he angry? But why?

“Okay,” she wraps her arms around herself. “I’m sorry for making you feel weird. Um, what are you doing here?”

“What are you doing here?” He asks defensively. “You just move in and are already breaking into buildings.”

“Oh yeah,” she says frantically trying to think of a not crazy excuse to be in here. “I guess you caught me. I heard some noises coming from inside. I found the open board and thought I’d check it out. It’s a pretty cool building. What’s it for?” She hopes he doesn’t realize she’s lying. He looks skeptical and opens his mouth before closing it again. Finally, he speaks. 

“It’s the community center,” he starts slowly, apprehensively. “It’s been closed for years. The boards are to keep people out. You must have been pretty determined to investigate a random noise from an abandoned building.”

“I’ve always been a little too curious for my own good. Do you come in here a lot?”

“Sometimes,” he says hesitantly. “When I need some alone time.”

“Oh, oh ,” she realizes. “I didn’t mean to bother you. I’ll just get going.” She walks towards the window past Sebastian.

“Did you find anything? The noises, I mean?” He genuinely seems interested. Enny turns her head over her shoulder but avoids his gaze.

“Nope, must have just been my imagination.” With that, she climbs out the window and disappears before he can say anything else. 

Enny wastes no time getting out of there. Stupid. You don’t know this Sebastian. Yours never went to the abandoned community center, or did he? I’ll ask when I see him again. Still, two bad run-ins today. Maybe I should just avoid people altogether until I leave. 

She makes good time getting home and finds it’s nearly 1am. Exhausted, she lays on her bed, trying not to think about all the bugs probably living in it. She hopes laying on top of the seemingly clean blanket will protect her. She falls asleep thinking about her Sebastian and all the questions she would ask him when she gets back. 

Sebastian looks at the line of code on the screen in exasperation. He spent the entire day working on this project, but still can’t finish it. Every sound upstairs makes Sebastian jump in fear. He managed to slip past Demetrius and into the basement this morning, but even his presence above is enough to send fresh waves of panic through Sebastian.

He needs a smoke, his lungs yearn for that familiar burn, but he knows he can’t go out for a cigarette without Demetrius knowing. He tells himself he can wait until everyone goes to sleep, it’ll only be a couple more hours. But as the night wears on, his skin itches like it is on too tight. He breaks out into a cold sweat and his pack burns a hole in his pocket. He finds himself periodically checking it to make sure it’s still there, as though it would jump out of his pants, leaving him with truly nothing. But he can’t wait any longer. The basement air suffocates him, he can’t breathe. The urge to smoke is greater than his fear of that man. 

He turns off his computer, slips on his shoes and jacket, and walks over to his door. He waits with his ear next to the door, but hears nothing. Sebastian gently puts one hand over the door knob and the other against the door to slowly open it. He puts his head out far enough to listen again, but is met only with the sounds of silence. He slips out through the door and takes the first step, careful to disperse his weight evenly. His heart beats harder with every step, until the sound of it crashing against his chest fills his head. 

“Maru,” Demtrius’s voice booms throughout the room. “Bring me the beaker on the counter.”

Sebastian’s eyes dart towards the voice of the man looking at a sample through his microscope. His head will only be down for so long, but Sebastian struggles to move from the stairs.

“Yes, Dad,” Maru complies, walking towards Sebastian. She stops, momentarily stunned, when she sees him. He feels his chest tighten, he’s been caught. But without another glance, she grabs the glass container and walks back to Demetrius. “Here,” she places it carefully next to him.

Sebastian takes the chance to bolt for the door. He practically runs through it despite his attempt to stay quiet. Once outside, he gasps for air, panting. He wastes no time walking away from the house down towards the town. He pulls out his pack and lights a cigarette. He brings it to his lips, breathing in the fire, letting it burn down his throat until it sets his lungs ablaze. The embers spread throughout his body, permeating every muscle, leaving an electric buzz on his skin and through his fingertips. His head briefly spins in an attempt to wash away the fear.

The community center comes into view. Sebastian puts out his cigarette and pockets the butt. He doesn’t want anyone to know he comes here and even though he’s not the only smoker, he’s the one who will be blamed. He ducks behind the building and walks up to the window, but the board is on the ground. What the fuck?

He hears some indistinct yelling coming from inside. Before he can think, he jumps in through the window. In the middle of the room and on her knees, he sees the farmer. Why is she here? 

“What are you doing here?” He asks. That’s when he sees the tears trickling down her face. Why does it hurt to see her this way?

“Sebastian…” she says weakly. Something in his heart reaches out in pain.

 “Why do you look at me like that?”

“Like what?” 

“Like you know me,” he needs to know. Maybe it’ll explain this feeling I get when I see her.

“I’m sorry. I guess you just remind me of someone else.” So that’s it? She doesn’t see me as me, just some other random guy. No one in this world sees me, just what they want to see. 

“Okay, well it makes me feel weird, I guess,” not weird, angry.

“Okay," she pauses. "I'm sorry for making you feel weird. Um, what are you doing in here?”

“What are you doing here?” He asks defensively. “You just move in and are already breaking into the building.”

“Oh yeah,” she says. "I guess you caught me. I heard some noises coming from inside. I found the open board and thought I’d check it out. It’s a pretty cool building. What’s it for?” 

She’s lying but how do I know that? He begins to ask her for the truth but rethinks it. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it. I know I don’t. “It’s the community center. It’s been closed for years. The boards are to keep people out. You must have been pretty determined to investigate a random noise from an abandoned building.”

“I’ve always been a little too curious for my own good. Do you come in here a lot?”

“Sometimes, when I need some alone time.”

“Oh, oh , I didn’t mean to bother you. I’ll just get going.” No, don’t leave, is what he wants to say, but he catches himself before it’s too late.

“Did you find anything? The noises, I mean?” Good save.

“Nope, must have just been my imagination.” Before he can say another word, she disappears through the window. She leaves him with an unsettling feeling. Like a yearning for something and anger because he doesn’t know for what.

Chapter Text

Enny wakes up and can barely move. Her body aches and screams in pain with every breath she takes. How can existing be this painful? She thinks. She spent the last week farming, cutting down trees, and breaking up rocks. The first day was so hard, she actually passed out mid swing with her ax. Yesterday, she focused more on watering, but she still has a couple of small boulders she needs to clear out.  She tries to lift her arms, but they don’t respond to her commands. 

“Damn you arms,” she berates. “Move!” She manages to pull herself up onto her elbows and picks her body up. She nearly falls when she steps out of bed. She slowly and painfully grabs some clothes and gets dressed. It’s possible nothing has ever been that physically difficult in her life. 

After nearly dying by getting up, she walks outside only to be met by a wall of rain. Great. Just my luck…Wait! Just my luck! It might be pouring outside but that means she doesn’t have to water her crops.  She debates going back to bed, but doesn’t think she’ll be able to get back up if she does. Instead, she decides to take her new fishing pole to see what she can catch. She’s spent some time down by the southern river and knows there won’t be a dry spot and doesn’t think she can make the hike up the mountain, even if it wasn’t raining. She opts to head to the beach as she remembers seeing an overhang and a bench. Hopefully, she can stay dry while fishing. 

“Shit,” she mutters to herself as she picks up her fishing rod, realizing she doesn’t have an umbrella. She groans loudly and looks over at the small, feisty plant on the table. “Phillip, I may have forgotten an umbrella.” Unsurprisingly, the plant responds with silence. “Okay, so maybe I didn’t exactly have one to begin with.” Again, silence. “You don’t have to be so judgy,” she mocks while grabbing a jacket.

She throws it on and quickly sets out for the beach taking the path through eerily quiet and empty town. Enny crosses the southern bridge to the beach, admiring its idyllic beauty under the rainfall. Enny walks to the pier by Willy’s baitshop and finds a dry spot on the bench. She looks out towards the water at the breathtaking view in front of her. The downfall and storm clouds muddle the boundary between the sky and the ocean. Captivated, she finds herself lost in its infinite depth.

But she’s here for a reason. She pulls out her pole and casts her line. She often fished with her grandpa when she would visit, but hated the boredom. Now that Enny is older she appreciates the wait. The sounds of the rain pattering down on the water blankets her soul, filling her with a solemn ease. It elevates her normal melancholy that drowns her life. 

She sits there for hours catching some fish, but mostly enjoying her privacy in the absence of people. That’s when she notices a dark figure walking across the other pier. Someone else really came out into this? 

He walks to the edge of the pier and stares into the abyss with a sense of understanding and longing. It is as if he is looking into an unattainable home from the outside. She watches him silently, before deciding to leave. She reels her line back in and packs up. She hurries down the pier back towards the beach without a second look behind her.

Enny wakes up to the sound of rain on the roof and a throbbing in her head. For a moment, she forgets about the hell she’s found herself in and lets herself melt into the sound of the water beating on the cabin. As the memories of the week return, she reluctantly picks herself up out of the bed and makes her way through the cabin.

It’s been one week since she woke up in this world. The first two days killed her, but the panic and fear has dulled since she started working the farm. It’s still there lurking in the back of her mind, ready to consume her, but kept at bay. She keeps busy, but the nights are the hardest, often falling asleep to a low growl echoing through her mind.

Every night Enny dreams of her past life in vivid detail. Sometimes they’re bigger events like her first day and others are small details or interactions. She dreams about how overwhelmed she was that first week and getting lost despite the small size of the town. She doesn’t understand how she remembers so much.

She still avoids everyone as much as she can and has been mostly successful, the one exception being her trip to Pierre’s for more seeds. She found the man to be the same sleazy salesman he was in her world, but she was able to slip in and out quickly enough to avoid running into anyone else. 

Enny doesn’t know if farming means anything here, but she knows it means something to her. So, each day, she wakes up, tends to the crops, checks for the wizard, then does more work around the farm. She cleared out a sizable amount of farmable land in front of the cabin, but the ground here is harder to work and doesn’t look like a sprinkler system could be installed. Doesn’t matter. I won’t be here that long. 

She gets out of bed and dressed, debating what to do with this rainy day. She doesn’t need to water any crops, and nothing is ready for harvest. She doesn’t have any more seeds to plant and doesn’t want to go to Pierre’s today. The man gives her the creeps. She also knows she can’t go to the beach. No doubt she would run into Sebastian.

None of that matters when she steps outside and sees she has mail.

“My sources tell me you've been poking around inside the old community center.

Why don't you pay me a visit?

My chambers are west of the forest lake, in the stone tower. I may have information concerning your... 'rat problem'.

-M. Rasmodius, Wizard”

“Fuck yes!” she yells at the letter. Without a second thought, she takes off towards the southern woods. Her body feels light and surges with adrenaline despite the pouring rain. Today’s the day. Today I go home. 

The tower comes into view, and she wastes no time running up the stairs and bursting through the door. Startled, the wizard faces her.

“Most people knock,” his face morphs from startled to a more curious look. He returns his gaze to the large, steaming cauldron. “I called you here to discuss the Junimos in the community center, but it seems you already know that, don’t you Enny? Who are you exactly?”

“You don’t know me?” She asks shakily, a mix of fear and anxiety settling into her chest.

“I know you do not belong here.” His eyes do not look up to meet hers.

“How do you know that if you don’t know me?”

“All beings carry an aura with them. Each is unique, but they all have similarities based on many factors. Your aura looks like none I have seen. It lacks a quality that all creatures share. So, I ask again, just who are you?”

“I don’t belong here,” that affirmation visibly comforts her. “I came from a different place, maybe an alternate reality. It was like the valley here but different. The people were the same, but not exactly like I remember them. I took over my grandpa’s farm, but it was a forest, not a beach.” Her voice quickens. “Ras, I lived there for years. I had a family. I had an entire life I built. All I want is to go back home.” Tears form in her eyes as her heart beats wildly in her chest.

“I have many questions and no guarantee of answers, but I will do what I can to help you.” He walks over to a table and grabs a worn, leatherbound journal. He opens it and begins to write what she says. “I have some basic questions to ask you first. Are you prepared?”

“Yes,” Enny replies with absolute conviction in her voice. “I will answer anything.”

“Then let us begin. When did you find yourself in this world?”

“One week ago,” she replies. “I woke up on the bus that originally brought me to the valley in my own world.”

“How long has passed in your world since the day you arrived?”

“10 years,” she feels the tears threatening to return.

“What were you doing before you found yourself here?” He asks.

“I..I was attacked in the caves in the desert,” her voice is weak.

“What kind of attack?”

“…”

“I cannot help you if you do not tell me.”

“I think I died,” blood drains from her face and she feels cold. “I fell into a weird cavern. It didn’t look like the rest and the entrance closed behind me. It was infested with creatures I’d never seen. I tried to run,” her voice shakes. “But one caught me. We fought, but it…it…it tore my chest open.” Enny begins seeing spots. 

“What happened next?”

“Next?” She forces herself to continue. “Um, the world went black, then I woke up on the regional bus into town. Everything looked the same, but also different. It was the same ride back, but the season was wrong. My body looks like my old one, but it’s so weak. I still came to the farm after my grandpa died, but it’s not my farm. Ras, what’s wrong with me? Where am I?”

“I do not know my child,” he says with visible concern. “I know such creatures exist that can slip through dimensions. I have not met one myself, but I hear they are ferocious in nature and unforgiving. They are known to bring their habitats with them, but it is unclear how. There are no instances of a person being taken, but that would be difficult to track. It is possible you were deposited into another dimension similar to your own. It would explain the difference in your aura. It seems plausible that the creature would need to pull any prey with it, but unusual that you would seemingly reemerge in a younger version of yourself. Did you injure the creature?”

“Yeah, I, um, I think I killed it.” Enny hesitates to continue. “It pinned me down. I only blocked its teeth by holding my sword in its mouth. I used a smaller blade to stab it, but it broke my galaxy sword. There was a bright light and it went limp, but it didn’t matter. It was too late.”

“Galaxy sword?” The wizard inquires. 

“Yeah,” she thinks back to the unusual circumstances leading to its possession. “I found a weird text on a gravestone about it. Told me to take a prismatic shard to the three pillars in the desert. It seriously felt like I was going to be sacrificed when I offered it up. Instead, everything got dark and the shard morphed into a sword. I took it to the other you and you said something about it being imbued with magical properties , whatever that meant. All I knew was that it was powerful. I don’t know if it was magical or not, but when I looked at it, I swore I could see the depths of the universe in its sheen.”

“I see,” the wizard reflexively strokes his chin. “There is a sword of legend thought to have been lost in the desert. I know little about it, but I can consult the texts from my library.”

“You think it did this?” 

“I do not know what to think at the moment. I have a few acquaintances who may know more about the interdimensional beasts. In the meantime, I will find what I can about our mysterious blade.”

Enny cannot help but feel a blossom of hope forming inside her. “Can you send me home?”

“I do not know,” he says cautiously. “But my curiosity is piqued. I will see what I can do.”

“How long will it take?”

“I do not know, these things take time.”

“How much time?” Her voice rising. “What am I supposed to do while I wait?”

“You said you inhabited the younger version of yourself, but it is different,” he says with a slight agitation to his voice. “I wonder what else is different. Try to find out what you can about this self. I will call for you when I know more.”

“But Ras–” she shouts, only to be cut off with a force through her that knocks her back out of the tower and into some mud. Asshole. She jumps off and flips off the tower, but can’t help but feel a slight tug at the corner of her lips. It’s small, but a smile tries to break through. 

Shane groans loudly as the sound of his alarm clock begins blaring. “Uggghhhhh.” He tries to hit it, but he can barely get his arm up to reach it. His face feels heavy on his pillow and his eyes refuse to open. He opts to grab the extra pillow next to him and manages to hit it on the first throw. It sends the clock flying across the room, ultimately unplugging it. Pleased with himself, he easily drifts back to sleep.

“Shane, are you awake?” A voice comes from the hall. “You’re going to be late.” A sudden knock pulls him back into consciousness. As much as he hates mornings and school, he hates disappointing Marnie more. He drags himself out of bed, nearly stumbling when he gets to his feet. 

“I’m up,” he grumbles, almost inaudible.

“Okay, hurry and get some breakfast, okay? Today’s a big day.”

Ah yes, he thinks, it isn’t a normal day of school. It is graduation day. Finally, he will be done with the world of academia and can live his own life. But what life will that be? That thought creeps up again. It had become more regular the closer he got to graduation. He shoves it down and replaces it with the excitement for all the parties. 

Shane doesn’t hate his life at home. Honestly, he lives a decent life. His parents died when he was young, but his aunt Marnie loves him, giving him everything he needs. He has friends, fun, and good enough grades to graduate. They love to go to gridball games in the city whenever they get the chance. Soon, he won’t be bound by curfews and would be free to do whatever he wants. Him, his friend Derick, and his cousin Stella plan to move into an apartment in the city. They have saved up enough for the deposit and two months of rent. Shane just turned 18, and tomorrow they are all driving to the city to sign their lease. They all work at JoJa Mart and already put in their transfer papers. It will be temporary until they find real jobs. 

Now brimming with excitement, he quickly grabs his clothes to get dressed. They all decided to go in Hawaiian shirts and shorts under their robes. The plan is to walk across the stage and as they grab their diplomas, they open their robes to flash their clothes to the world. He looks at the time, 9:45am. “Shit,” he mutters. He needs to be at the community center in 15 minutes. He doesn’t understand why they have to be there 2 hours before the ceremony. 

He throws his clothes on and grabs a breakfast burrito on his way out the door. It is one of his favorites, filled with peppers and eggs from his aunt Marnie’s farm. As he eats it, he remembers being about 6 years old and getting locked in the coop. He thought he was so funny hiding in there, but it took him awhile to realize he locked himself in. He still doesn’t know how he managed that with the lock so high on the door. At first, he was afraid he’d never get out. That Marnie would never think to look in there for him and he’d starve to death, or worse, get eaten by starving chickens. It didn’t take long for one of them to sneak up behind him and peck him right in the leg. He jumped higher than he thought any person could. He turned around and met the eyes of the little demon. It clucked at him and continued its assault, this time on his feet. Shane ran around the coop but the chicken wouldn’t relent. “This is how I’m going to die,” he thought, embarrassed. 

He chuckles to himself, remembering how panicked he was in that coop. He remembers the moment he discovered the way to the animal’s heart was food. As soon as he grabbed a handful of feed, with the intention of throwing it at her, she stopped in her tracks and slowly walked up to him. She ate it out of his hands, then settled into his lap. She softly clucked herself to sleep. He couldn’t believe how innocent she looked after terrorizing him. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep with her, waking up hours later to the sounds of Marnie calling for him.

That was the day he discovered his love for the chickens. He spent most of his free time playing in the coop and feeding the chickens after that. He knows he will miss them the most when he leaves tomorrow, but no lease in the city allows chickens, and a house is out of the question. Stella needs to be close to campus and the inner city is one of the most expensive places to live. They are lucky they found a three-bedroom apartment they can afford. 

Shane picks up his speed as he passes the saloon. He turns before Pierre’s and slips around the corner of the building where Stella and Derick are both waiting for him. They greet him with big smiles and even bigger hugs. 

“Can you believe we’re graduating today?” His cousin nearly squeals.

“It’s about damn time!” Derick chimes in.

“By tomorrow night we’ll all be in the city looking for cheap Craigslist furniture for our new apartment!” Shane beams. The three of them can’t contain their excitement and break out into laughter. Then, Derick reaches into his robes and pulls out a silver flask. 

“Look what I brought,” he waves it in front of them. They both light up with anticipation. “Ladies first,” he says as he hands it to Shane. One hand reaches out for it, while the other grabs at his heart, feigning pain in his chest.

“I’m hurt,” he says as dramatically as possible. Derick is met with a hit in his arm while Stella gives him a disapproving look.

“What am I?” She questions with a look of betrayal, as Shane takes a swig.

“Stella, you’re too smart to be a lady and could easily beat up either of us,” Derick replies.

“There are so many things wrong with what you just said,” she draws out the word ‘so.’ “Women can be smart and strong. Men don’t have a monopoly on that. Just because you are only attracted to bimbos, doesn’t mean that’s all we are,” she explains, playfully frustrated, while snatching the flask from Shane’s hand. She takes a long drink, nearly finishing it, just to prove a point.

“Woah now Ella, we know you can outdrink us,” Shane unsuccessfully tries to grab the drink from her hand. “And bimbos? Really? Is that really how you want to support feminism? By berating other women? Sounds a little misogynist to me,” Shane counters.

“I can’t be a misogynist! I’m a woman!” She practically yells, but the laughter breaks through. The other two erupt with laughter as well. 

They split what is left of the flask and make their way to the community center where Lewis stands in front of the doors, motioning them to hurry inside. He looks like he aged 10 years overnight from stress, but at the same time, happiness shines in his face, probably due to the fact that they will soon be graduating. It is safe to say that they are the most problematic students the town saw in years. Between setting chickens loose in the school and egging the mayor’s house, they have built quite the reputation. 

“Why am I not surprised that you three are late?” The mayor asks rhetorically.

“Because everyone knows the importance of being fashionably late,” Derick quips. 

“You’re wearing the same thing as everyone else!” The mayor argues.

The three just laugh as they enter the building, careful not to breathe while they pass Lewis. Inside, they are greeted by the raucous sounds of their classmates. There are only about 30 of them. Stardew shares the community center with neighboring towns. All of them are too small individually to support their own schools, so they pool together in Stardew. The mayor claims it makes the town grander, but Shane suspects it is just to cut costs. The mayor is always on the cheaper side. 

Shane, Stella, and Derick are the only three from Stardew this year. They aren’t too close to the other students, so they keep to themselves during the pre-ceremony festivities. They eat snacks, laugh, and occasionally sneak out, only to be chased down by Lewis. Shane has to admit, the guy is fast despite his appearance. 

They finally line up by town inside the community center, ready for their graduation debut. As the music starts, Lewis frantically checks that they are in the correct order before rushing outside to start the precession. On time, the line walks outside and takes their seats in front of the stage. Lewis waits until everyone is seated and begins his repurposed speech from every year before. He adds in a unique story to each class, but the rest is almost verbatim. 

Once it is time to walk, each school goes up one at a time, saving Stardew for last. As the three walk up to the stage, Lewis hands them their degrees, shakes their hands, poses for pictures, and under his smile tells them “whatever you’re thinking of doing, don’t.” But it is too late. Just as the cameras snap their pictures, they open their robes and strike poses in their outfits. Some of the other freshly graduated students break out in laughter and cheers, while others wear looks of shock and disgust. Shane swears he even sees Marnie let out a small chuckle. 

Before Lewis can say a single word, they all run off the stage in different directions. Lewis might be fast, but he can’t catch all three of them. They weave through the crowds and disappear, each taking elaborate routes before meeting up at the lake southwest of town, just past Marnie’s. Winded and out of breath, the three fall over in laughter. They spend the rest of the afternoon lying out in the sun, reminiscing on the day and their lives in the valley. Stella talks about her aspirations of becoming a vet, while Shane and Derick want to make it big at some sell out corporation. They just want to make money and don’t care if they are passionate about their work as long as their new jobs fund their lavish lifestyles in the city. 

Shane doesn’t want this to end. He loves his friends and hopes they can build something together in the city. Eventually, they make their way to the afterparty, where they spend the night drinking and partying, until they pass out. Shane remembers drifting off on a couch thinking about their new adventure.

Shane wakes up to a pounding in his head from the night before. He opens his eyes to see the ceiling fan on, always on, always working its meager life away. It’s a slave to this world and will never break free from those bonds until it’s nothing but a pile of broken wood and wires. He feels sorry for it. It doesn’t even know how pathetic it really is.

He stumbles out of bed and grabs his throbbing head. Fuck . He thinks he might have had too much to drink last night. He can barely stand as every muscle in his body screams at him. Yoba. How much did I drink last night? He honestly can’t remember or how he made it to his bed. Shane quietly walks out of his room, careful not to be noticed by Marnie or Yoba forbid Jas. Who knows how he acted to them last night. 

He silently walks through the kitchen and out to the coop. Their soft morning clucks soothe his anxiety but not his head. He walks to the back of the hay bails and pulls out a bottle of vodka. He takes a small drink and forces down the vomit threatening to burst from his stomach.

It takes some time, but he finally manages to keep a few drinks down. Already, the pain in his head dulls, and once he’s feeling relatively normal, he gets up to take care of the chickens. He feeds them and gives them water while they all playfully run around the coop. He collects the eggs and stores them in the cartons by the door to take inside. He walks over to the incubator to check the temperature levels and sees one of the little chicks breaking through the shell. 

“You’re rather anxious to get out of there, aren’t you?” He talks to the chick. “I didn’t expect any of you for another day or two.” He gives a thoughtful sigh. “Take it slow, little one. The world can be a cruel place. No need to rush.”

He pets a few of the chickens and finally makes his way out of the coop. He walks to the front of the house and notices Marnie’s empty counter . Good. She doesn’t have to see me like this . He goes to the coat rack but finds his jacket isn’t there. Weird . He checks his room again but it’s not there either.

If it’s not here, I must have left it outside last night. He thinks back to the night before and vaguely recalls being on the pier. He opens the door to a wall of rain, regretting his previous night’s loss. He makes the rather brisk walk through the woods until he finds the deck out onto the lake. He looks around but doesn’t see it anywhere. He decides to walk around the lake, hoping it’s not lost. 

Shane spends a soaked hour searching through the brush and trees, trying to find any clues to its whereabouts. Finally, he finds an empty beer can and mentally berates himself for littering while picking it up. He looks around the surrounding area and finally spots a blue fabric behind a bush.

Excitingly, he jogs over and picks up his jacket. As he turns to leave, he hears a distant crash in the direction of the tower. He looks through the trees and spots the farmer on the ground. She gets up and flips off the door before walking away.

Shane can’t help but let out a small chuckle.

Chapter Text

Enny explores the southern woods and unexpectedly stumbles upon a little girl jumping rope. She wants to introduce herself but thinks better of it, as kids really shouldn’t be talking to strangers. Enny moves deeper south into the trees until coming upon a bridge. She crosses it with an excitement of disappearing further into this world. It leads to a small little island with a single tree that looks content to have the entire island to itself. Moving on, she finds another narrow bridge leading to a small clearing. She can’t help but take in the world around her. 

Enny makes her way back following a third bridge, feeling a little turned around. Yoba, these woods are confusing. How do I get home? She finally makes her way back to the lake with the dock. Near it, she sees a blonde woman taking pictures. I guess I need to start introducing myself. I just wished I weren’t covered in dirt. The blonde, Haley she says, is less chatty and more degrading. Enny quickly leaves and heads back to the farm exhausted. 

Enny wakes with a groan and a headache. It doesn’t seem to matter what she does, every day she wakes up the same way, groggy from her dreams with a pain in her head. She wonders if it means something. 

It’s been 3 days since talking to the wizard and she’s growing antsy and impatient. She quickly tends to her farm and decides to head to the tower. At the very least, she thinks it might matter to tell him about her dreams. 

It’s only mid-morning by the time Enny walks through the wizard’s door. He stands near the wall mumbling to himself. 

“Good to see you’re accepting guests today, or should I expect to get thrown out on my ass again?” She says with all the snark she can.

“The day is still young my dear,” he replies, “I regret to inform you I have learned little of your predicament at this time.”

“Yeah, I kind of figured,” her tone deflates. 

“Then what brings you out this far, if you knew no information would come?”

“Dumb hope mostly,” she replies discouragingly. “But also, I keep having these weird dreams and headaches when I wake up.”

“Oh? What kind of dreams?”

“They’re about when I first moved here. But like in vivid detail, as if I’m there again. There’s details that I definitely wouldn’t have remembered.”

“And you think they are accurate?” His curiosity piques.

“Maybe, I mean some of them are. I forgot completely about a box of parsnips the mayor left me. I dreamt about it first and when I woke up it was there.”

“Hmm, I will keep that in mind in my research,” he replies curiously. “Have you found any information about this version’s you?”

“No…” Enny replies embarrassed. “I haven’t really talked to anyone to figure it out.”

“Why not?”

“You’re right, I should just go up to everyone and be like hey I’m from an alternate reality can you tell me about myself? ” She sarcastically replies. “They’ll think I’m crazy and lock me up.”

“I suppose that is true. You could try a more subtle approach.”

“I’m not very subtle,” she snorts.

“No one in the town knows you. You can be any version of yourself, and they would be none the wiser. Talk to them. Ask about the other you’s grandfather here and compare it to your own.”

“I guess,” Enny feels apprehensive about the prospect of talking to anyone in this town.

“It would do you some good to socialize with these people. My understanding is that mortals struggle with seclusion and crave social contact. The worn features on your face tell me you could use a positive in your life while you are here. We do not know how long that will be. It has not even been 2 weeks and I can tell you are suffering.”

She couldn’t argue with his assessment.

“Fine, I’ll try,” she concedes.

“Excellent. In the meantime, if anything new comes up with your condition, do let me know.”

“You’re not going to kick me out if I do?”

“I did not say that” he says with a twinkle in his eyes and a smirk on his face. “I was having a particularly difficult day. Still, I should not have taken my frustrations out on you when you came to me in your time of need. I give you my sincerest apologies.”

“Oh, I wasn’t expecting that. Yeah, apology accepted. To be honest, it wasn’t the first time you’ve kicked me out of your tower.”

“What was the nature of our relationship in your world?” He asks.

“It was more businessy. You helped me talk to the Junimos and whenever I had questions about the valley’s magic. The first time you threw me out was because I tracked a bunch of mud in. You didn’t even let me talk. You took one look and sent me flying back. You wouldn’t talk to me for days. You never apologized though.”

“Interesting. We shall need to compare notes about the other me, as well. We will save that for another time. I am busy with work that needs my undivided attention. Come back in 2 days and we can speak then.”

“Yeah? Okay, I’ll be here in 2 days.” Enny is surprised by her own excitement at making plans with the wizard. Maybe she really is craving social contact.

“Good. I expect to hear about your findings from the townspeople.” 

With that, Enny leaves. She hadn’t planned anything for the rest of the day. I guess this is as good of a time as any to “meet” some people. She doesn’t have the stamina to remeet many people, but figures 1 or 2 would be a good start. 

Conveniently, upon leaving the forest, she runs into Leah. Enny immediately notices how vibrant and lively she looks as she did in her own world. Leah’s beautiful copper colored braid lays delicately over her shoulder. Her forest green shirt compliments her hair and makes her look like she was born from the woods. She is gorgeous in the most natural way.

“Hello, I’m Leah, it’s nice to meet you,” she beams at Enny.

“Hi Leah, I’m Enny. I just moved to the valley.”

“You picked a good time, the spring is lovely,” Leah gives all her attention to Enny. She has a way of making you feel like the most important person in the world.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful here. Have you lived here long?”

“Oh, not too long now,” she says rather vaguely. Enny knows she left the city and her girlfriend behind. She never really opened up about her life before the valley and Enny never pushed. She encouraged her as an artist, and they frequently foraged together. In all that time, Leah focused on the present. 

The only reason Enny knew about her ex, Kel, was because she showed up during a picnic they had together. Enny was disgusted by her behavior and shocked when Leah punched her in the face, but Kel never came back after that. Leah told Enny how Kel was driven by money, and she didn’t want that life. 

They never talked about Kel or Leah’s old life again. 

“Did you know my grandpa?” Enny changes the subject.

“I did. He actually showed me the best places around the valley to forage. I learned a lot from him. Kenneth was a great man and cared deeply about his farm. He used to talk about how rewarding it felt to work the ground with his own hands. He talked about you too. He talked about how you spent the summers here when you were younger. He said you loved working on the farm, especially with the animals.”

At that statement, Enny feels a pang of guilt course through her. It is just like she remembers it from her own home.

“I actually hated farming,” Enny sheepishly chuckles. “I just loved spending time with him. I never felt like I fit in with my own family, but he made me feel wanted.” She might be talking about someone else’s life, but the words are still true.

“He had that effect on people. From the first day I moved here, he welcomed me into his home like we had always been family.” Leah looks at Enny with concern. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Enny didn’t even realize she was crying. She always loved her grandpa and her time on the farm. She regrets not spending more summers here in those last few years. Even though this was not the same man who gave her a home, she still feels a sadness for the life she missed with him. 

“No, I’m sorry. I really like hearing about him. I didn’t visit him as much as I should have in the end.” Why is this bothering her? She has long since mourned and accepted the death of her grandpa. 

“He read all your letters though,” Leah says encouragingly. “They brightened his day.”

Letters? I never wrote him letters. A new pain begins to choke Enny. Not one from guilt, but from a new form of regret. Regret that things could have been different. They are different here. Enny is being compared to this world’s farmer and she is already a disappointment. 

“Thank you,” she says quietly. “It makes me happy to know he was happy.” Even if he wasn’t her grandpa, she is still glad to know he was happy in the end. 

“I’m here if you ever want to talk about him, or anything really.” She puts her hand on Enny’s shoulder for comfort. “I know what it’s like to be new in this town, suffering from grief.”

She suffered from grief? Enny had no idea in her world. Just another thing to ask when I get back. 

“I would really like that,” and she means it. “I would love to hear more about him and get to know you.”

“Great! Would you like to get dinner tomorrow night at the saloon? Gus makes an amazing salad.”

“Yeah,” she hesitates at agreeing to more social contact. “That sounds good.”

“Have you been there yet?” Leah asks.

“No,” yes . “Not yet.”

“You’re in for a treat,” Leah digs through her pocket, pulling out a phone. “What’s your number?”

“Oh,” Enny’s face heats in embarrassment. “Well,” she turns her head away slightly. “I don’t exactly have one. I sort of left my stuff on the bus.”

“Seriously?” Leah blinks in surprise. “Did you call the bu–oh, I guess you can’t call them,” a small chuckle escapes her lips. Her hand flies to her face to stifle it.

“Are you laughing at my suffering?” Enny feigns hurt.

“I-I’m,” she stammers. “I swear, I didn’t mean to.”

“No,” Enny laughs. “I’m sorry. I’m just kidding. How about I meet you at your place and we can head over together?”

“Sure,” Leah lets out a relieved chuckle. “That would be great. Is 7 o’clock okay?”

“Yeah, that works.”

“Perfect! It’s a date.” Leah truly looks excited despite her alternate’s introverted and shy nature. 

They part ways and Enny heads back to the cabin, feeling a small seed of warmth in her chest at her own excitement. When the cabin comes into view, that warmth is replaced by a different type of anxiety. She feels she’s tainted something special here with her presence. The Enny of this world had a better relationship with her grandpa. Where was she? Did she even get on the bus here? Did something happen to her ? She needs to find out but isn’t sure how. Enny cannot bring herself to go in. You don’t belong there. That voice cuts through her head, but it’s right, she doesn’t belong here. She’s an intruder in this life. 

It’s barely noon. She thinks the library would be a good place to start. She remembers spending time on the computers there before…well, before Sebastian came into her life. He always let her use his extra computer when she needed it, no matter how trivial the reason was. 

She quickly pushes that thought from her head. She wants to find answers about this world’s Enny, but she doesn’t want to risk running into anyone, brooding man or gossiping housewives, by walking through town. She decides to take the path north of the cabin up the mountain. It should be easy to hide from him through the woods. She can walk along the river on the east side of town down to Joja Mart. From there, it’s a straight and secluded walk to the library. 

Enny hikes up the mountain and finds herself in the woods near Sebastian’s. She still feels the pull to him. It takes all her self-control not to run in there right now just to feel his arms around her again. It isn’t her Sebastian, but maybe it would still bring her some comfort.

She pushes down her impulse and carefully treads through the trees. She takes in every detail as each tree feels familiar but slightly altered. Branches that twist in different directions and exposed roots that nearly trip her. 

Once through, she takes in the lake before her. Its edges appear more jagged in the day, taking away from its serenity. The water reflects the bright sunlight off its surface, but only to mask its own darkness beneath the surface. She moves on quickly in case Sebastian comes out for a smoke. 

She finds the river coming from the lake and takes it south into town. She climbs down to the riverbank and sticks to it until she comes to a bridge. Enny takes a quick look around and determines no one is there. She bolts across the bridge and disappears into a small park. From there, it’s a short and quiet walk to the library. 

She passes by Clint’s blacksmith shop and sees the library. She quietly slips in and is greeted by a tall mustached man in a royal blue cowboy hat.

“Hello there! Welcome to the Stardew Valley Archaeological Office.” His wide smile reaches both his eyes. 

“Gunther, right?” Enny feigns ignorance.

“That’s correct. Are you the new farmer?”

“Yeah, that’s me.” Enny looks over to the library and sees no books on the shelves. “It looks like someone made off with the entire collection.”

“That’s exactly what happened.” He looks surprised at the correct, albeit already known, assumption. “It’s embarrassing, but I’m hoping to remedy that soon.”

“I’ll be happy to bring you any artifacts or books I find.”

“Why thank you Miss….I’m sorry I don’t remember your name.”

“It’s just Enny, no Miss please.”

“Okay, well thank you very much Enny. The museum anxiously awaits your generosity.” He beams. “Can I help you with anything today?”

“I’m hoping so. Do you have any computers with internet I could use?”

He immediately deflates.

“I’m sorry, but no. Our internet stopped working a few days ago. I couldn’t get any help on the phone, so I asked one of the townspeople to take a look at it. He’s actually due here anytime. If you wanted to wait, he might have it fixed soon.”

“One of the townspeople…” she trails off. “Is it, um, is it Seba-“

But before she can finish, she hears the door open behind her. She turns to face the person she is trying to avoid.

“Ah, Sebastian, right on time.” Gunther says. Sebastian’s eyes do not even glance in Gunther’s direction. They are fixed entirely on Enny. She stares into his endless obsidian-colored eyes only pulling her gaze away to study his face. The round curve of his nose, his sharp jaw, those tender looking lips, no Enny stop. You shouldn’t be looking at his lips like that . Still, he looks almost identical to the man waiting for her at home. 

He looks at her with an intensity that makes her feel uncomfortable. Too much time passes in silence. She looks back at Gunther and he seems as confused as her. 

“Thank you for coming down to look at the internet,” Gunther starts. “I know this isn’t the kind of work you normally do.” That finally snaps Sebastian out of his trance, but his eyes refuse to leave Enny’s face.

“Yeah, sure,” he seems disinterested and unsure of what he is talking about. “What um, what’s going on again?”

“Well, Elliott was doing some research for his book on the computer when-“ Gunther is quickly cut off by Sebastian.

“What are you doing here?” He asks Enny.

“Oh, I, uh, was just trying to use the internet, but I guess it’s not working, but well you obviously know that. That’s why you’re here.” She stammers nervously. “I’ll just go. I don’t want to get in your way.” She steps past Sebastian, close enough to breathe in the lingering smell of smoke and pine. She turns her head slightly, careful not to meet Sebastian’s gaze. “Thanks Gunther. I’ll see you later.”

She hurries through the door and races around to the back of the building. She stops to control her breathing. It’s not him. It’s not him. It’s not him. It doesn’t matter if he smells exactly like your Sebastian. It doesn’t matter that his jaw could cut glass and his lips could…STOP. She doesn’t want to finish that thought. Every part of her wants to run back to that man for comfort, regardless of who he isn’t.

Enny ignores the warm need that momentarily rushes through her body. She doesn’t know how long he’ll be, so she decides to hurry home the same way she came. She makes it all the way to the woods in the mountains before slowing down to catch her breath.

“A stranger? Hello.” She looks up to see a disheveled man whose face is buried beneath a grayed beard. 

“Linus,” Enny huffs out.

“Oh, you know my name already? Most people here avoid me. I think they’re just afraid of the unknown. I’m surprised that someone even knows my name.”

“Uh, yeah. I didn’t mean to invade your space out here. I’ll just get going.” Enny picks up her pace out of the woods. She doesn’t slow down until she closes the cabin door behind her.

He looks over the water to the horizon. He follows it across the ocean back to the beach. That’s when he sees two long braids soaked in the rain running across the beach. Who else would be out here? She looks like she’s in a rush to get out of the rain, but has a fishing pole . She disappears over the bridge before he can even see her face.

Sebastian wakes up confused with a slight headache. He is no stranger to nightmares, sometimes waking up dazed and stricken with panic that he cannot explain. He has vivid dreams of being trapped and tortured, always trying to escape, but never able. When he has those nightmares, he carries that fear with him into the waking world. That trapped feeling is only amplified by his confinement in this life. 

Still, these recent dreams have been different. They are random moments from his life. He sees frogs in the rain, goes shopping at Pierre’s, or plays pool at the saloon. They are seemingly unrelated until she shows up. 

He still doesn’t know who this mystery woman is that keeps dropping into his dreams. He only catches glimpses of her but saw her face once. It was fuzzy, but he cannot forget the stunning deep blue of her eyes. 

When he met the new farmer, he saw a flash of those eyes in her. Even more, she wears those same long braids. The weirdest part was the immediate pull he felt towards her. He has never been a warm person to new people, but he felt overwhelmed by the urge to tell her everything he was feeling. Get a hold of yourself. You’re seeing what you want to see. She has a similar look to the girl in your dreams and you’re convincing yourself it’s more than that. 

Sebastian reluctantly pulls himself out of bed and gets dressed. He walks upstairs and is greeted by his mom calling over from her shop.

“Hi Sweety,” her voice is far too chipper for Sebastian’s half-asleep self to process. “I didn’t expect to see you up so early or I would have made some more coffee.”

“Yeah, I definitely don’t want to be up. Gunther asked for some help at the library with their internet. I don’t know if I can fix it, but he seemed desperate.”

“That’s nice of you to help.” Robin’s face shines with fondness for her son.

“Yeah, I guess.” Sebastian quietly passes the lab and heads to the kitchen. Thankfully, Demetrius isn’t in it. He starts a fresh pot of coffee and stares out the window in the forest while he waits. He can just barely see some sunlight reflect off the lake. 

Coffee in hand, he walks back to the basement, only waving at Robin on the way. He blindly grabs a shirt and throws it on with some pants. He packs up a small bag of troubleshooting equipment. He hates that people don’t really know what he does. Still, he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy physically working on connection setup. He’s new to it, but his mom taught him a lot of electrical work.

He finishes his coffee, grabs his bag, and heads out the door with a quick wave to his mom. Outside, he lights a cigarette and lets the smoke fill his lungs, that familiar burn. He pulls out his phone to see a text from Sam. 

Sam: Hey man, wanna game later?

Sam can wait. He won’t even think Sebastian is up for a few more hours. He pockets his phone and makes the hike into town. He takes the path by the river so he can avoid the rest of the town. He gets the strangest feeling as he walks. He sees fresh footprints on the ground and smells something sweet, something familiar. He looks up further and sees someone disappear over the bridge. 

Two long braids. It can’t be. Before his brain can catch up, his legs take off into a run. He nearly trips over his own feet, but it doesn’t slow him down. He finally reaches the bridge and crosses it. Where did she go? He looks around but sees nothing. Did she go into the Joja Mart? 

He looks at his phone. Damn, I’m already running late. He debates checking the store but realizes how crazy this is. Get your shit together. You’re just tired. He decides to continue to the library but catches himself looking around more attentively than usual. 

He finally comes to the library and mentally prepares himself before entering. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He doesn’t expect to see many people here, but that didn’t make him any less anxious. 

He walks through the door and smells that same familiar scent. He looks toward the front desk and sees two long, messy braids falling against her back. Sebastian stops breathing.

“Ah, Sebastian, right on time,” Gunther says. He barely registers what he says as she turns around to face him. Those deep blue orbs lock onto his own. This is the first time he has seen her in the light. Her skin is slightly tan, probably from farming, but he still sees faint freckles across her nose. Her mouth was slightly agape in surprise. Her big doe eyes, those dark blue eyes he could get lost in, mirror the ones from his dreams. 

“Thank you for coming down to look at the internet,” Gunther starts. “I know this isn’t the kind of work you normally do.” 

“Yeah, sure, what um, what’s going on again?” He can barely comprehend what Gunther is saying. 

“Well, Elliott was doing some research for his book on the computer when-“ 

“What are you doing here?” He asks her.

“Oh, I, uh, was just trying to use the internet, but I guess it’s not working, but well you obviously know that. That’s why you’re here. I’ll just go. I don’t want to get in your way.” She quickly steps past him, and he breathes her in. She is sweet, like vanilla. “Thanks Gunther. I’ll see you later.” Before he can tell his mouth to speak, she’s gone. 

After a long pause, Gunther finally asks, “Sebastian, are you okay?” His question breaks him out of his trance. He runs out the door and quickly scans the area. Where did she go? He can’t think, can’t see, can’t breathe. His head spins and he falls backwards against the door. He tucks his legs to his chest and buries his face into his knees. It’s not her. It’s not her. It’s not her. 

He feels pressure on his back and realizes the door is opening. He shifts slightly, just enough to hear Gunther from the other side of the door.

“Sebastian, what’s going on? Do you need me to call Harvey?” His voice full of worry.

“N-no,” his voice creaks, “I’m okay. I just need a minute.” After another pause Gunther finally speaks.

“Okay, I’ll be right in here if you need me. If you’re longer than a minute, I’m calling Harvey.”

The door closes and Sebastian stares up at the sky. Its bright blue covers the valley and gives everything life. It makes the trees and flowers shine vibrantly. Even the clouds in the sky sparkle in adoration of its home. 

After several deep breaths, he picks himself up and dusts off his clothes. No amount of light can brighten his muted presence. With one final look around, he walks back inside. 

“Sebastian, are you sure you’re okay?” Gunther immediately asks.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m just not used to being up this early.” Gunther doesn’t look convinced, but he does not press it. “Tell me again what’s going on.”

Gunther looks pensive for a moment, “You sure you’re up for this?”

“I’m here, so let’s do it.”

Chapter Text

Enny has met almost everyone in town. How can meeting people be so exhausting? She supposes it has to do with her social anxiety. There is something more intimate about being in a small town compared to the city. 

She decides to avoid people today and explore the northern woods up the mountain. It’s scarcer than the southern woods, but still private. She breathes in the pine smell emanating from the trees and feels the warmth of the sun shining down on her. 

“Hello?” A voice calls from around her. Enny looks around and sees a man behind a bush. Is he just hiding behind a bush? Realization hits Enny as to why he’s back there, reddenning her cheeks.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to um, interrupt you.” She averts her gaze, looking anywhere but towards the man. “I’ll just…Uh…Okay bye!” And she runs further into the woods.

She shakes off the weirdness lingering on her skin and resumes looking around. She finds a small bridge crossing over a stream leading out of a cave and into the lake. She follows the beaten bath over and past the bridge until she comes to the mouth of a cave. She peers in but sees nothing through the darkness.

Curiously and cautiously, she walks in slowly. As her eyes adjust, she takes in the view. It’s dark and not well kept, but she sees the faint outline of a decrepit elevator. Definitely, not creepy at all. Definitely not the start of a horror movie. 

“Ahem,” someone clears their throat loudly.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Enny screams while running backwards and tripping over a rock. She hits the ground hard and scrambles back to her feet, only to trip over the same rock again. Boisterous laughter fills the cave.

“I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m Marlon from the Adventurer’s Guild.” A hint of amusement lingers on his voice. “Although, your reaction was quite comical. Are you okay?”

It takes a few moments for the panic to pull back enough to think clearly. She looks at the man and his image does not soothe her nerves. He is wearing a long red cloak, thinly veiling the sheath of a sword. Gray tousled hair sits on his head with a long black strap running across it and down his face. It opens up to a patch covering his left eye only to disappear under his thick locks.

“Yeah, I think so.” She manages to breathe out while climbing to her feet. “What are you doing here? You fucking scared the shit out of me.”

“I see that,” amusement in his voice. “I monitor activity in the cave. I come in here occasionally to stare down into the abyss. This dark, undisturbed place is home to more than just ore.”

“What the actual fuck does that mean?”

“You have such colorful language,” he laughs. “You probably won’t believe me if I tell you.”

“I’m honestly not sure I believe you’re really here right now. I probably hit my head and now my brain’s fucking with me before I die.”

“I promise I’m real. To be honest, there are some nasty creatures down there that try to make their way up to the surface occasionally. I try to keep their numbers in check, but it’s getting harder.” His explanation only slightly eases her worries.

“Isn’t there anyone in town to help?” She asks, surprised by her genuine concern. 

“Not just anyone can do this. I’ve asked the mayor to post flyers at Pierre’s, but no one ever responds. You are one of the only people to ever venture into the mine.”

“You mean other people aren’t as batshit as me?” She huffs out a laugh. “Not stupid enough to walk into a cave they can’t even see in?”

“Yeah, I suppose not,” his laugh fills the cave with a sense of warmth and comfort. “Are you planning on going down the shaft?” 

“I seriously just fell over a rock, twice, by the mere sight of you. What makes you think I can go into creature infested mines? Are you that desperate?”

“Well, partly, but it’s more than that. Do you remember coming here when you were younger?” He asks.

“I’ve never been here before. I would definitely remember something like that.” 

“Hmm, I see,” his eyebrow pinches inward.

“Are you seriously telling me I came here?” Did I come here? How could I forget that? “That’s…no, that can’t…” she trails off, deep in memory. Marlon waits while she searches her head for anything about these caves. She can’t remember anything, but a nagging in her stomach says he isn’t lying.

“Tell me what you know,” she demands.

“You used to try and sneak into the caves. You couldn’t have been older than 7, so it’s not surprising you don’t remember. I often had to fish you out of the first few floors. Once, you managed to get down 5 floors on your own, all without any weapons,” he says with a hint of admiration in his words.

“I’m sorry but what? Are you saying you should have armed a 7-year-old?”

“No,” he laughs, “not at all. You were just obsessed with these caves. It was impossible to keep you away. We tried to keep them clear so you wouldn’t get hurt.” Enny finds an image of a woman with silver colored hair shimmering white in the sunlight, pulled back into a ponytail. It swayed back and forth as she walked. What was her name?

“Isabelle…” Enny pulls a name from nowhere. Silence settles in the cave. Enny looks at Marlon and sees the hidden features of pain. She means something to him.

“She was my wife,” his voice somber. “You two were inseparable. Wherever she went, you followed her as a shadow.” How could she have forgotten? Her parents only gave her pain and suffering, but there is a warmth thinking about this faceless woman.

“I’m sorry I don’t remember her,” Enny looks down. “I just remember her hair.” He lets out a laugh full of sadness.

“You loved it so much. You started wearing your hair the same way, but it was too short to put in a ponytail, so you put some hay in your hair to make it longer.”

“I remember that!” Enny’s face lights up. “It was itchy for days.” They both laugh and Enny thinks this means more to him than she knows. She didn’t miss the way he said she was his wife. 

“When I look at you, I see her. You both have that same cold fire in your eyes that glints with mischievous curiosity. I know it’s not much, but I think she would want you to have this.” He pulls out a very worn sword. “It’s a training blade. You can’t do too much damage with it, but it’s good for the shallow layers of the mines.”

Enny takes the sword and looks at its dull shine. It’s heavier than she expects, but she feels something powerful course through her. It’s like something has been missing from her life. 

“I don’t know what to say Marlon.”

“No need to say anything. Don’t feel like you have to go down there. Although, I suspect you won’t be able to stay away. Just be careful and be safe.”

“I will.” Marlon moves towards the cave’s exit. “Marlon, wait.” He turns to face her. “Thank you. For the memory. I don’t have enough good ones.” He nods and for a moment Enny swears she sees a shimmer from a tear in his eye. 

“Thank you, Enny.” 

“Marlon!” She screams as she wakes up before realizing it was another dream. This time, she already remembers every moment of the encounter. That meeting weighed heavily on her for a long time. Enny remembered more about her adventures in the mines every time she met with him. They trained together, ate together, laughed and cried together, and shared their love of Isabelle. 

She died from cancer. It was fast, but painful. Marlon told Enny how difficult it was to see her in the end. She was so frail. His love never wavered, but she felt immense shame over how weak she had become. She always hoped to die fighting for something that mattered. Instead, she died sick in a hospital bed, and it killed Marlon to watch her spirit break. 

She would be lying if she said she doesn’t miss him and their relationship, but she’s afraid to see him here. What if things are different? What if he doesn’t remember me? What if he does? The fear of rejection kept her away from him and the mines, but she doesn’t want to avoid them anymore. She grabs her pack and heads out to do her farmwork. Afterwards, she’ll go see Marlon. 

Enny gets stronger everyday but still isn’t used to the weakness of this body. She has to take several breaks throughout the day and eat constantly. It’s exhausting. Thankfully, she has a light farming day, mostly just watering crops. She’ll harvest tomorrow and get more seeds to plant then. 

As soon as she’s done, she jogs up to the northern path. The world shines with life and color in the late morning light. The pine needles glow in a deep green, perfectly contrasting the dark brown of the pinecones. Birds sing around her, and the world buzzes with life. The cool breeze cools her hot skin and floods her nose with the sweet scent of flowers. 

It’s a nice walk. She almost forgets the tragedy of her current life. She plucks a leek from the ground and sets it near Linus’s campsite. Then, she finds the bridge and follows the path into the cave. It’s too early to go to the Adventurer’s Guild, but she can still enjoy the familiarity and calmness of the mines. 

Enny crosses the threshold and is immediately met with a wall of cold, damp air. She breathes it in and feels her body relax. She looks around and finds it looks identical to her own mine. The elevator is in rough shape and the ladder looks like it’ll crumble under her weight. She half expects to see Marlon hovering over the abyss, but sadly Enny stands alone in the dark. 

She doesn’t have a proper weapon, but feels confident she can use her ax in the upper levels. She doesn’t hesitate to jump down to the first floor and pull it out. She is surprised and comforted to find how similar it is to the one back home. 

A couple of bright green slimes shimmer through the darkness. She can’t give anything the chance to attack her first and lunges at the first, swinging the ax upward at a diagonal angle. She cuts it cleanly and in the same motion brings it back down on the second one. Both burst, covering the ground and Enny’s leg. Still gross . 

She clears the rest of the floor, finding only one more slime. Then, she switches out her ax for the pickaxe. She needs to take it slow, but wants to grab some ore while she’s down here. She doesn’t know how much longer she’ll be in this world, but she’ll be damned if she keeps using shitty tools.

Enny finds a couple of veins filled with copper and coal. Once she depletes them, she moves onto the next floor finding the same green slimes and more ore. She falls into an easy rhythm of killing and mining. It feels good, like she is her authentic self in these mines.

Still, she feels the limitations of this body and knows it’s time to leave, knowing she only has a few more hits in her. She looks around for the elevator shaft. She’s pretty sure she’s on the 5 th floor and might be able to get it running again. She finds it behind some rock and grabs her pickaxe to break it up. She hits it once, ugh my arms. Twice, a coldness creeps into her arms. Three times, blood drains from her body, just a little more . Then on the fourth swing her vision spots and the weight of it pulls her down, crashing onto the ground. She lays there staring at her motionless arms as the world fades to black.

“Enny?” A comforting voice calls. “Are you okay?” The fog lifts from Enny’s head and she slowly pulls herself up into a seated position. She looks around to find herself at the entrance to the mine. She sees the owner of the voice and immediately leans into him, hugging him as tightly as she could.

“Marlon,” she cries incoherently. “What’s happening to me?” He stiffens at her embrace, but the pain in her voice brings him to reciprocate the hug. She remembers collapsing in the mine by the elevator, but how did she end up here?

“I found you unconscious in the mines. Are you okay?” Enny remembers where she is, and that he doesn’t know her like she knows him. She quickly pulls out of the hug and stands to her feet. She nearly falls over until Marlon grabs her arm to support her. “Hey, you need to take it slow.”

“Right, sorry,” she stammers. “I didn’t mean to, uh, well….” she trails off, unsure of what to apologize for first.

“Don’t worry about it. You should have seen me my first time down there. A slime jumped at my leg, and I ran scared straight into a wall. Gil had to pull me out because I knocked myself out. I left with a concussion and bruised ego.” 

“Did that really happen?” She chuckles.

“Yeah, but tell anyone and I’ll throw you back down that shaft.” He smiles with a twinkle in his eye.

“I’ll keep your secret if you keep mine.”

“It’s a deal.” He gives her a nod. “What were you doing down there?”

“Um, well, I’m a bit of an adventurer, and also, a bit of an idiot. I remember coming here as a kid and wanted to see if it changed.”

“I’m surprised you remember that,” he beams. “You did well for your first time, and it looks like you don’t even have a sword. I’m impressed.” Her Marlon or not, his praise still fills her with pride. “Here, take this, for the next time you’re feeling adventurous.” He hands her that same training sword that first awakened her to a dormant part of herself.

“Thank you, Marlon,” she says with sincere gratitude as she takes the sword. It still feels like a part of her.

“Tell me, how did you know my name?” He questions.

“Oh, uh, I remember you too.” She gambles that they share a similar past. “You used to pull me out of these mines.”

“Yes, I did more than a few times.” He looks thoughtful. 

“Still are.” They both chuckle. Enny finally pulls away and stands on her own. “What time is it?”

“About 6,” he answers.

Shit . Enny will need to rush back home to shower and be ready to meet Leah in time. 

“Thank you for your help. I’m okay now. I really need to head out and meet a friend.” He looks disappointed that she’s leaving already, and Enny knows her own face mirrors his.

“I see, well please be safe. Stop by the Guild sometime.” He looks like he wants to say something more but remains silent. Enny gives him a wave and leaves the cave. 

The walk back takes longer than she expects. Her muscles ache, and she has to stop several times. Once home, she jumps in the shower, letting the warm water soothe her aching muscles. She wants to stay here and wash away all her pain from the mines. 

She’s disappointed to end it so quickly, but has little time before Leah arrives. Ugh. Clothes seem like too much work. She grabs a black tee and denim shorts, her only actual clothes having left the rest on the bus. Luckily, she found some old clothes in the farmhouse when she arrived, albeit out of date and loose fitting. As she finishes getting dressed, someone knocks.

“Hey,” Enny greets Leah on the porch. “Am I that late you had to come get me?”

“Not at all,” she smiles mischievously with her hands behind her back.

“Uh, what’s that?” Enny tries to eye the hidden object.

“Well,” she reveals her hidden treasure as a ball of orange. “I just found this cat at the edge of your farm. I thought it might be yours.”

“Definitely not. Do you know who else it might belong to?” Memories of her fluffy black cat, Avocado, flood her mind. 

“I’ve seen him since about the time you moved in. I assumed you brought him with you.” Enny knows where this is going, and she tries to avoid it. Avocado is the sweetest little black kitty that just wanted to sit in your lap and be petted. This little cheese puff can never replace the burnt spud of her life, no matter how adorable he is.

“Nope. We should put up a flier for him.”

“Good idea. Should we just leave him outside? Or can he stay here?” Leah asks, cocking an eyebrow.

“I guess he can stay here,” Enny says hesitantly, “but just for tonight.” She’s trying to convince herself more than Leah.

“Great!” Leah beams. “I think he’ll like it here, you know, just for the night.” Her voice mischievously lowers at the end. “Anyways, are you ready to go?”

“Give me one second. I just want to get this little guy, oh I mean girl, some water.” She grabs a bowl and fills it up. She sets it down and the little fluff runs over to it quickly. “Alright, I’m ready now.” Enny contorts her face into the closest thing to excitement she can manage.

The walk is less stressful than Enny expects. Leah happily talks about the valley and its inhabitants, as though she senses Enny’s reluctance to talk about herself. Still, Enny feels her chest tighten as they step onto the cobblestone at the edge of town. She hasn’t gone further than Pierre’s and the outer edges. Tonight, she is going to the literal and metaphorical center of it. 

She hopes it’ll be a slow night, but worries when she sees Marnie and Willy coming up from the south. She looks toward the northeast and sees Robin and Demetrius walking down . Shit. What day is today? Enny has counted the days since she arrived, but hasn’t paid attention to the actual date.

She does some quick math and realizes, today is fucking Friday. Which means everyone will be at the saloon, including Sebastian. The intuitive Leah picks up on Enny’s anxiety and stops just behind the saloon.

“Hey, are you okay?” The cheer in her voice is replaced by concern. “I didn’t mean to overwhelm you. We can leave.” Enny needs to do this. She can’t keep avoiding everyone. At least right now, she has Leah.

“No, it’s okay. Would you be okay to be kind of a buffer tonight? I get overwhelmed by people, but I need to finish meeting everyone.”

“Of course!” The excitement returns to her voice. “I’ll fend them off with my bare hands if I need to.” Both girls laugh as Leah mimics a boxer. “Really though, if you need to leave at any time, just let me know. No questions asked. I’ll get you out of there.”

“Thanks Leah, I really appreciate it.” Leah just nods before responding. They finish the short walk to the entrance of the bar. 

“You sure you’re ready?” Leah asks. “It’s not too late to turn back.”

“I’m ready.” Enny is surprised by the confidence in her voice. 

They walk in and are immediately met by music, laughter, and singing. This place exudes fun and excitement just as it did back home. It has always been a source of comfort and familiarity from the delicious food Gus whipped up to weekly pool nights with Sebastian, Sam, and Abby. Even though this isn’t her saloon, it still slightly melts her worries.

She looks around and takes it all in. She sees Willy alone at a nearby table, no doubt waiting for Clint. Marnie and the mayor are chatting at their own table and laughing . I wonder if they are still dating here . Robin and Demetrius are dancing like nobody's watching. It’s still hard to see him and not feel immense hatred. Pam and Shane are at opposite ends of the bar drinking alone. Shit. Shane. Hopefully things aren’t weird.  

They walk up to the bar to be greeted by a very cheerful Gus.

“Well, hello there! I'm Gus, chef and owner of the Stardrop Saloon. You must be the new farmer everyone is talking about.”

“Yep, that’s me. My name is Enny.”

“It’s wonderful to meet you, Enny. What can I get you both tonight?”

“I’ll take a glass of your house red.” Leah requests.

“I’ll get the same, please.” Enny adds.

“Coming right up,” Gus responds with a smile and disappears behind the bar. “Go have a seat and I’ll bring it to your table.” They find a table near the back and Enny looks at the small table menu.

“How are you doing? How are you feeling?” Leah speaks up.

“Leah, you are seriously the sweetest person I’ve ever met.” Enny chuckles. “I’m good. Are you getting the salad?”

“Yes, I am.” She is very excited about her food choice. Enny can tell she’s been looking forward to it. A woman in a vibrant red dress with vibrant blue hair walks up to their table holding a bottle of wine and two glasses.

“Hi ladies, Gus told me to send over this bottle on the house. It’s a housewarming gift,” she explains. She then turns towards Enny. “I’m Emily. You’re Enny right?”

“That’s me,” she replies while nervously tucking her arms in. Emily did not miss the anxious tendency as her eyes momentarily landed on her arms.

“I’m sorry. I’m sure it’s weird to have people know you before you meet them.”

“Oh, well yeah, kinda.” Enny relaxes a little. “I’m worried I won’t live up to the hype, you know?” Emily lightly touches her shoulder and gently looks into her eyes.

“You have nothing you have to live up to. You are you and you are perfect. Never let anyone tell you otherwise.” Her intimate words cut through the noise of the bar and drown out the world. 

“I, um, I don’t know what to say. Thank you, Emily.”

“Anytime. I also happen to know for a fact that Leah here will knock out anyone giving you a hard time,” Emily says with a wink causing Leah to nearly choke on her drink.

“I believe that,” Enny says with a laugh. “She looks pretty scrappy.”

“Hey now!” Leah tries to defend herself while her face turns beet red. “That was one time. It’s not like I’m going around looking for a fight.”

“Wait, Leah?” Enny feigns surprise. “You actually hit someone?” 

“Well, I mean yes, technically, I may have once, well hit, yeah okay I hit someone.” Leah’s face somehow burns an even brighter red. 

“She was defending my honor,” Emily says with a wink. “But it’s not my story to tell. I’ll let you two get back to your drinks.” She turns to Leah. “Do you want a salad tonight?”

“Yes, please.” Leah can barely contain her excitement. 

“What about you Enny?”

“I will also take a salad. I hear they’re amazing.” She gives Leah a playful smirk.

“Two salads coming right up. Let me know if you need anything else.” Emily walks away, leaving a very embarrassed Leah looking anywhere but at Enny.

“Leah.” 

No response.

“Leah.”

“These are some lovely looking walls, don’t you think?” 

“Leah.”

“Okay, fine! I hit someone, but she deserved it.”

“I have no doubt,” Enny chuckles. “You definitely don’t have to tell me about it.”

“It’s okay. It’s just embarrassing. She was my ex from the city, and she found me here. She tried to make me go back with her and started yelling at Em. I couldn’t take it anymore and I just wanted her out of my life. Before I realized what happened, she was on the ground with a bloody nose. She got up, yelled that I was making a huge mistake, and took off. I haven’t heard from her since.” 

“Holy shit, dude. That’s intense.”

“Yeah, it was. She had been harassing me for a while, but when she saw me with Em, she tried to attack her. I immediately went to the mayor after it happened, and we filed a police report. I had a restraining order against her though, so there were no charges against me. Still, I feel awful that I resorted to violence like that,” Leah carries shame in her voice.

“It’s valid to feel that way. It sounds like you did a good thing though. You protected someone you cared about and stood up for yourself. Those aren’t easy things to do.” I would know.  

“Thanks, Enny. It’s sweet of you to say that. I don’t know why, but it’s so easy and natural to talk to you. Like we’ve known each other our whole lives.” Enny feels the same, but she has known Leah for a decade. 

“I know the feeling.” She gives Leah a soft smile. “Now on to the most important topic. You and Emily, huh?” Now her smile turns into something more wicked.

Leah buries her face into her hands and stifles a scream.

“Am I that obvious?”

“Well, you two are definitely close, and defending her honor sure sounds like something a girlfriend would do.” Just then Emily returns with their salads.

“Here you go,” she says as she sets each plate down. “Anything else you need right now?”

“Nope, I think we’re all good, Em.” Enny gives that same fiendish grin to Emily, who whips her head around to Leah laughing.

“You really told her?” She cannot contain her laughter. “I’m shocked. Is there something going on here? Should I be worried?” She gestures to them both. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen Leah open up so quickly to anyone.”

Leah has lost the ability to speak.

“I knew I liked your vibrational energy.” Emily gives Enny a friendly smile. “I’ll leave you two so you can eat.” Then she looks at Leah. “I’ll see you tonight?”

Leah can’t get the words out. She simply nods her head. Enny and Emily burst out into laughter again. Enny hears her laughing all the way to the bar. 

She was never very close to Emily back home and again finds herself wondering how similar they are. Maybe when she gets back, she will get to know her better.

The night continues with Leah and Enny sharing stories, eating, drinking, and laughing. She is surprised at how easily their friendship comes. Sure, she was friends with the other Leah, but it wasn’t like this. This is natural and comfortable. 

Leah tells Enny stories of her grandpa. Turns out, he also didn’t like to farm much. He preferred tending to the animals and fishing. She even watched him get pulled in the lake off the dock by some mysterious fish that he never caught. 

After a few hours, the bar begins to thin out. Enny had already caught herself more than once looking in the direction of the game room. With people trickling out, she finds it hard to look away.

“Are you a fan of arcade games? Or pool?” I swear nothing gets past Leah.

“Oh, is that what’s back there?” Enny feigns ignorance.

“Mhm,” she gives Enny a suspicious look, “we can go check it out if you want. There are usually a few people back there on Friday’s, but we can wait until they leave.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay.” Enny waives her hands in front of her face. “I was just curious.”

Just then, three figures emerge from that room. Tall and blonde Sam walks out first, muttering something about being better next time. No doubt Sebastian just whooped him in pool. Next is Abby with her amethyst-colored hair that bounces effortlessly on her shoulders. She puts her hand on Sam’s shoulder and gives him a big laugh. 

Finally, Sebastian appears. Enny stares at the dark clad man with wisps of jet-black hair in his face. He is slender, but under those clothes are muscles not visible through his hoodie. She remembers tracing over each curve on his arms, the hardness of his abs, and the hardness of— STOP. Stop being such a pervert Enny and get your shit together.

“Helloooooo,” Leah’s voice snaps her out of her trance. “You okay?”

“Oh, yeah,” she stammers, “sorry, what were we talking about?”

“Uh, well now we’re talking about how your jaw just dropped to the floor while drool poured out across the entire bar floor. Seriously, it’s going to be slippery walking out of here.”

“Oh Yoba, was it that obvious?” Enny looks mortified.

“Oh yeah. So, which of those three got you so hot and bothered like that?” Leah is clearly enjoying her vengeance.

“N-no, it’s not like that.” Enny tries to convince Leah, and well, maybe herself too. “It’s um, well, I’ve run into Sebastian a few times, is all.”

“Sebastian!” Leah squeals. “You couldn’t have picked a harder challenge. Also, I’m pretty sure him and Abby are dating.”

“Wait, what?” Enny heard her words, but somehow, she can’t comprehend them.

“Yeah, I’ve run into them a couple of times around town, while they were together. It always seemed real intimate. They’re not real flashy about it, but sometimes I see them holding hands and even once making out.”

The blood drains from Enny’s face while a cold sweat washes over her. She suddenly becomes aware of everything in her stomach as her body wants to throw it up. The world begins to spin and she doesn’t know what’s happening.

“Enny!” Why does Leah sound so panicked and so far away? “Quick, get Harvey!”

She feels something warm wrap around her shoulders and sees Leah facing her . How did she get so close? And why did everything get so tall? She looks around and sees feet? What’s going on?

“Enny, can you hear me?” That voice sounds familiar but definitely not Leah’s . Enny manages to nod. “Okay, good. I need you to tell me three things you can see.”

“…feet.” Her voice is weak. “Leah. Tables.”

“That’s great,” that voice says, who is that ? “Tell me two things you feel.”

What does she feel? She flexes her fingers to get a grasp of what she’s on. 

“The ground, I’m on the ground. It’s hard and cold.”

“You’re doing great. Okay, what do you smell?”

“Pine.” Where is pine coming from? She’s in the bar, isn’t she? She looks around and sees Leah in front of her with someone with glasses. Oh. It’s Harvey. Why’s he here?  

She feels that warmth around her shoulders again and turns to look at its source. Inches from her face, she stares into a pair of dark eyes filled with worry. Why do they look so sad?

“That’s good. That’s really good. Enny, you’re having a panic attack. Have you had them before?” Harvey asks.

“Um, yeah,” she responds, while holding her gaze on those eyes. It’s been a long time since Enny had a panic attack. She still suffers from anxiety, sure, but a full-on attack? Those are less frequent.

Slowly, the face in front of her becomes clear. She sees the black bangs strewn across his face and the quiver of his eyebrows saying he’s scared.

“Sebastian.” She breathes out and melts into his arms. 

“Hey, taking a break?” Abby calls as she walks towards the porch. “Mind if I hangout?”

She sees nothing other than the faint outline of a person sitting on the steps of the old farmhouse. She hears no voice, but she knows she is welcome. A puff of black pounces on her boot. Abby just laughs and picks up the little shadow.

Abby wakes up to the sounds of her father throwing boxes around the shop. I see he’s in a great mood. My head cannot handle this right now.

She grabs her phone to see it’s late in the afternoon. She must have dozed off playing games. Abby heads to the other end of her house, looks around, and quietly slips into the altar room. It was left over from the previous owners and only ever used on Sundays by some of the townspeople. It’s the perfect place for Abby to hide from her parents. They would never guess she would go in there. 

She pulls out her phone and texts Sebastian.

Abby : Hey what are you doing?

He responds quickly.

Sebastian: Working. What’s up?

Abby: My dad’s in a shitty mood. Can I come over?

She sees the dots appear, disappear, then reappear before responding.

Sebastian: Sure

Abby: Sweet! See you soon 😘

She ignores the pain in her chest at his short reply. She knows he’s stressed at home too, but hopes it isn’t her bothering him.

Abby gets ready and nervously heads to the shop at the front of their home. She peers through the door and sees Pierrre isn’t there. She practically sprints to the front door, letting her breath out as soon as she’s on the other side. She knows she shouldn’t feel this way in her own home.

Abby doesn’t want to get caught by her dad, so she heads toward the mountain path before he returns. Once she’s past the community center, she lets herself slow to a leisurely walk. She really wants to go trek through the overgrown fields of the farm, but she knows someone just moved in. 

When she finally reaches Sebastian’s, she feels a bit of anxiety creep up. It has been happening more often and Abby doesn’t understand why. She loves him, but he seems to be a source of that anxiety. She pushes it down and walks through the door.

“Hi, Robin. How’s it going?” She asks.

“Hi dear, it’s been a pretty relaxing day. Are you excited for game night at Gus’s?”

“That’s right, it’s Friday. Sometimes I lose track of time.” The two of them giggle and Abby heads to the basement. That feeling of dread builds up as she walks into his room. 

“Hey, just give me a minute,” he calls from behind his computer, but Abby ignores his request.

“Do you ever get lonely down here?” She asks, while walking over to him and pulling his chair out.

“Abby, what are you doing? I’m trying to work,” he snaps. He’s been so edgy lately. 

“Come on, hang out with me,” she pleads. He lets out a sigh and moves over to turn off his computer.

“What do you want to do?”

“We could go explore the caves?” She asks full of hope.

“No.”

“What about a walk through the woods?”

“No.”

“Okay, fine. What do you want to do?” Her playfulness is replaced by frustration.

“I want to work,” he mutters.

“Seriously?” His words cut her.

“Come on, Abby. You knew I was working and we’re all hanging out tonight.”

“Is it so bad that I wanted to hangout with my boyfriend alone?” She retorts.

“Look, I’m not really in the mood for that,” he blushes.

“That’s not what I meant!” She shouts.

“Then what did you mean?” He angrily asks.

“I mean I was having a shitty day and didn’t want to be around my dad. I thought you would be here for me.”

“Abby,” he starts, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have blown up like that. Come here.” He reaches out for her arm and pulls her down into his lap. “I’m really sorry.” 

She stays quiet.

“Abby,” he says low and seductively. Still no response. He leans into her and lightly kisses her neck. 

“Okay, fine. You’re forgiven. This time.” She leans down to meet his lips just as the door swings open.

“Let’s—oh come on you two. Get a room.” Sam pretends to throw up.

Sebastian throws a pillow at him, but Sam ducks and it hits the wall. Abby gets up and takes a seat on the couch.

“Have you guys met the new farmer yet?” Sam changes the subject. 

“No, but she came into the store once. My dad is hoping to sell her seeds,” Abby says matter of factly.

“I haven’t either. I keep trying to, but she never comes into town. What about you?” He looks at Sebastian.

“Oh, yeah,” he nervously says like he’s been caught doing something inappropriate. “I mean, I ran into her. But it’s not like we talked or anything.”

“Dude! You’ve actually met the elusive farmer?” Sam practically sings. “Tell me all about her. Does she like music? Well, of course she does. Does she like pool? Or video games? I need to know!” 

“You didn’t tell me that,” Abby feels a slight stabbing in her chest.

“It was nothing really,” he grabs the back of his neck. “The first time was when I was out by the lake. She took off pretty quickly.”

“The first time?” Abby’s voice is quiet.

“Uh, yeah. I ran into her at the library. Well, really, I just walked past her, or I mean she walked past me.” He rakes his hand through his hair, panicking. 

The room became uncomfortably silent. Finally, Seb speaks.

“I’m going to go out for a smoke.” He doesn’t wait for a response before bolting out the door.

“Dude, what was that about?” Sam asks Abby. But she doesn’t reply. Instead, she just stares at the door he disappeared through. “Look, Abby, I’m sure he’s fine. Yeah, he’s been a little off lately. But I think it’s just from work,” Sam offers a reasonable explanation.

“What if it’s like before, Sam?” Her voice shakes. “It started like this too. He pulled away, threw himself into work, stopped talking to us, stopped everything.”

“Hey, hey, hey, Abs. Shhhh, it’s going to be okay.” He rushes to her side to hold her while she cries. “It’s not like that this time. We won’t let it be like that.”

“Yeah, okay.” She tries to shake off the hurt and worry. “You’re right. I think I’m just going to go.” She stands and walks to the door. “I’ll see you tonight.” She gives Sam a small smile and he just nods as she goes. 

Abby leaves the house and finds herself pulled to the path leading to the farm. She knows she can’t go there, but still wants to. She decides to go east, towards the mines. She never goes too far in, usually just sitting at the edge of the shaft looking down.

She imagines what it would be like to go down there. She’s heard sounds coming from below, like something lives down there. Maybe she’ll learn to use a sword and find out for herself. It is unusually loud this time. When she focuses hard enough, she’s sure she hears a voice.

The sounds quickly die down and once again she’s left in silence. 

When Abby finally leaves, the sun is low in the sky. She checks her phone and sees it’s after 5. I guess that means it’s time to head to Gus’s . She isn’t looking forward to the awkwardness that waits for her there. 

As she walks up to the front doors, she sees Sebastian smoking outside.

“Gross.” She hates that he smokes.

“Hey, Abby, look about before–,” he starts but is cut off.

“It’s fine. I overreacted. I guess I’ve just been stressed too. School and stuff you know?”

“It’s not fine. I should have told you I met her. I swear though, it isn’t like that. I’ve just randomly run into her.” Abby sees the sincerity in his eyes. She steps toward him, and snakes her arms around his chest.

“No more secrets?”

“No more secrets,” he agrees.

“It’s about tiiiiimmmmmeeeeee.” Sam walks up, drawing out the one syllable word. “You guys ready to go in? I’m feeling lucky tonight.”

“Yeah? You think you’re going to win in pool?” Sebastian raises his eyebrow skeptically.

“Oh yeah. There’s extra luck in the air.”

“You know that extra luck applies to me too,” Sebastian’s lips curve into a sinister smile.

“No, it doesn’t!” He looks at Abby. “It doesn’t, right? Abby, tell me it doesn’t.”

She just laughs and heads inside. They take up their usual spot in the game room. She heads straight to the arcade game, Prairie King. She doesn’t pay attention to their game of pool, but knows Sebastian is winning by the groans she hears from Sam.

“Man, come on,” he whines. It’s supposed to be my night, not yours.” He gives a pout to Sebastian, who appears to be unfazed. 

“I told you, it’s my luck too, but that’s on top of my skill,” he says with an evil twinkle in his demon eyes. They continue like this until Sam decides to take a break and jump on Prairie King with Abby.

“I need a minute where I’m actually good at something,” Sam proclaims.

“Then you should keep looking,” Abby responds without hesitation. Sam covers his heart as if he’s been dealt a fatal blow. Then his voice gets too low for Sebastian to hear. 

“It’s nice to see him like this.”

Abby can’t help but agree. He does seem like his normal self tonight. They share a warm smile and return to their game until Sam eventually gets tired of losing another game.

“Alright, I’m out guys. I can only handle so much pain in one night.”

“Yeah, I need to get back home and work a bit more.” Abby feels a flush of guilt knowing she’s the reason he didn’t work earlier.

“Cool, let’s head out together.” She hides the guilt with a smile. 

As they walk towards the door, Sam whines about his loss.

“It was supposed to be my nighy.” Abby just laughs and pats his back.

“Maybe next time champ,” she can’t contain her laughter.

She turns to look at Sebastian, but he suddenly wears that despondent look. When he sees her staring, he quickly plasters a smile on his face. She realizes tonight was an act. He doesn’t want them to know how badly he’s hurting.

“Enny!” She hears a scream across the saloon. “Quick get Harvey!” Is that Leah?

Harvey pushes through the crowd and moves to the floor. She feels shoving behind her and realizes Sebastian is also running towards the scream. 

“Dude, is that the new farmer?” Sam asks Abby.

Abby doesn’t hear anything else that’s said as her eyes are fixed on Sebastian holding this woman in his arms. Tears well up in her eyes and she feels selfish for being upset. He’s trying to help her. But why is he trying to help her?

He looks scared. Abby can’t watch anymore and runs outside. Sam follows and stops her before she gets past the saloon.

“Abby, wait!” He calls. She turns to him, tears streaming down her face. “What’s wrong?”

“This is so stupid. He doesn’t know her, but runs to her like that?” She screams at Sam. “Tell me that’s not weird.”

“Okay, yeah Abs, it’s a little weird,” his voice sounds weak.

“Yoba, I’m so stupid,” she cries into her hands. “I’m upset that he’s helping her. Am I that insecure?”

“Hey, hey, no.” Sam rushes to her side and holds her arms. “It’s okay to feel the way you do. Especially after what happened earlier. I just mean, umm…” he struggles to find the words.

“You just mean after he lied to us about her?” Her voice turns into frustration and anger.

“He didn’t exactly lie.”

“You’re seriously defending him right now?” She yells at Sam.

“It’s not like that Abs,” he defends. “I just think we owe it to hear him out.

They hear the door of the saloon swing open and turn around to see Leah and Sebastian holding up the farmer. They’re far enough around the saloon that they don’t see Sam or Abby.

“Don’t worry Harvey,” Leah says. “I’ll make sure she gets home safely.”

“Okay, but make sure you stay with her, and she comes in tomorrow,” he responds.

“Oh, I won’t let her out of my sight.” Leah directs that to the farmer. Then she turns to Sebastian. “I can take her back myself, you don’t have to be here.”

“You know that I can hear you. I’m fine and don’t need an escort.” The farmer interjects.

“Ha! As if I would let you walk home alone,” Leah laughs. “Not after you fell like that. The last thing I need is the guilt of you passing out and getting mauled by a bear. Do you know how that would make me feel?”

“Your concern for my well being is noted,” she snorts, then looks at Sebastian. “She’s right though. You don’t have to come too. I’m sure you have better things to do than be an unpaid chauffeur.”

“Oh no, I’m charging you,” he laughs authentically. “Seriously though, I want to help. Especially after you helped me.”

The three of them disappear around the other side of the saloon and Abby stands there shocked.

“Abby,” Sam starts hesitantly. But before he can say another word, she bolts.

Chapter Text

Enny looks over the lake shimmering in the moonlight. It’s late, but she soaks in the peace of the dead of night. Across the water, she sees glowing embers come from a dark silhouette and watches the person as they too stare out over the lake. Somehow, it feels like she’s intruding on an intimate moment, so she quietly slips through the forest towards home.

Enny wakes up to the quiet mews of a lion laying on her chest. She looks down and sees this beast rise and fall with her chest. She groans, but still reaches to pet the little demon.

“I guess you’re not so bad to have around. It does get a little lonely here.”

Enny slides the cat onto the bed and sits up. She stands to walk to the bathroom, but trips over a person shaped lump on the floor.

“Ow!” It yelps. “There are easier ways to wake a person up.” Leah sits up, hair falling out of her braid in a mess.

“Shit, I’m sorry! Are you okay?” Enny asks, confused why she’s there.

“Nothing an outrageously expensive medical bill won’t fix,” a smile tugs at the corner of Leah’s lips.

“Great. I look forward to yet another invoice from Harvey,” Enny scoffs.

“Oh yeah, he wants you to go see him this morning,” Leah climbs to her feet. 

“Hard no,” Enny rolls her eyes. “That man is going to take all my money. Seriously though, what happened last night?”

“We were having a lovely time until SOMEONE had to ruin it with a panic attack.”

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry,” a wave of nausea hits her stomach, the after effects of the attack and the guilt she feels.

“It’s okay, I’m just giving you a hard time. We brought you back here and I stayed to make sure you were okay.”

“Who’s we?” Enny questions. Leah’s sly smile grows into a very sinister grin.

“No one in particular. Just your town’s friendly, brooding emo,” Leah subtly raises her eyebrow.

“Sebastian?” Enny’s eyes widen in shock. “You’re not serious.”

“Oh yeah, that boy didn’t want to leave your side. I practically had to kick him out last night.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Enny blinks in disbelief. The memories from the night before flood back to her.

“You must have left quite the impression on him.” That evil smirk returns. “He said something about you doing something for him.” Enny can feel her cheeks heat up.

“It’s not like that at all,” she defends.

“Uh-huh, sure.”

“Seriously, the first time I met him he was having a panic attack by the lake.”

“Oh, you’re serious?” Leah seems genuinely surprised. “That’s not what I expected. What happened?”

“I found him on the ground. I helped him and then left. Nothing else.” That blush finds her cheeks once again. Leah looks at Enny skeptically before answering slowly.

“No wonder he was so worried. I didn’t know he had them too. That makes sense though.”

“What do you mean?” Enny asks.

“Well, I just heard some things about him once,” Leah seems hesitant to continue.

“That’s ominous and vague. What kind of things?” Enny feels her stomach tighten.

“I don’t know if I should say anything.” Enny doesn’t want to push, but that pit in her stomach needs to know. 

“Yeah, okay. I understand.”

“Look, I don’t want to spread rumors, but I’m also worried about him after what you said.” Leah looks conflicted. “But I heard that he tried to kill himself. It was right before I moved here. Everyone in town knew, and there was a cloud over the people for a while because of it.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah, fuck.” Leah looks relieved to get it off her chest. “I guess Abby found him.” Enny feels her queasy stomach again and wants to throw up. He never did that in his world. Sure, he struggled with depression and anxiety, but it was never that bad. Was it?  

“I, I had no idea,” Enny whispers. 

“Enny, it’s okay. It was a long time ago and it sounds like you really helped him. I’ve never seen him like he was last night.” Why did he act that way last night? Her Seb was so difficult, and it took weeks for him to even talk to her.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks for telling me, Leah. I promise I won’t say anything about it. I am glad to know.”

“You can always talk to me about it.” Leah puts her hand on Enny’s shoulder. 

“Um, I think I need to get to work. I could use the distraction.”

“Can I help you?” Leah requests.

“No thanks.” Enny shakes her head. “You’ve already done so much and it’s therapeutic for me.”

“Fine, but if you need anything, promise you’ll come get me okay?”

“I promise,” Enny smiles weakly.

“Alright, I’ll get out of here. Be on the lookout for my medical expenses,” she gives a playful smirk, eliciting an eye roll and small chuckle from Enny. 

Enny just waves as Leah leaves. She looks at the red hues of the sunrise blend into the dark blue of the night. Ugh seriously? Even when I’m on my deathbed I still wake up at the ass crack of dawn. Enny sets out to do her farmwork. She has crops to harvest today and needs to get some more seeds from Pierre’s. Gross . Just the thought of that man gives her chills. 

I’m sick of farming, I really need to get the materials for Robin to build me a coop. She finishes up harvesting and puts off watering until she plants the next batch of crops. When she turns to the drop off bin that Lewis creepily checks every night, she realizes she has a letter.

Fuckkkkk, it’s probably another Yoba damned bill. Harvey’s almost as sleazy as Pierre. When she opens it, she realizes it’s not a bill at all. Instead, the mayor is inviting her to the egg festival tomorrow. 

She always loved the egg festival. That’s where she won her favorite straw hat. She wore that thing every day, becoming a daily ritual before she went out to farm. But she doesn’t know if she can bring herself to go to the festival again. Everyone from town will be there, including Sebastian. She knows she has to talk to him eventually, but that really isn’t the place and she isn’t ready. 

That’s a problem for Tomorrow Enny . It’s still a little early to go to Pierre’s so Enny ponders what to do instead. Oh right! I’m supposed to talk to the wizard today . She packs up her bag and heads to the tower. She can talk to him, then grab her seeds on the way back.

She walks into the wizard’s tower much calmer this time. After all, it’s just to talk about her experiences since being dropped here. She doubts he’ll know anything else yet.

“Hello, my dear,” he casually greets her. 

“Hey, Ras.” She walks over and takes a seat next to his desk.

“I trust you have spoken more with the townspeople.” He’s still as long winded as she remembers.

“Yeah, a little. Mostly Leah and Marlon,” she picks up a small stone on the table and absentmindedly turns it over in her hand.

“Marlon was an excellent choice. I believe he knew you when you were a young child.”

“It was the same in my world. It sounds like my relationship with him here lines up with mine back home.”

“Did he tell you about his partner?”

“Not directly, but I’m guessing she died here too?”

“Yes, sadly,” he confirms with a nod. “It was nearly a decade ago now. Cancer, I believe. He was incredibly distraught. He sought me out for a cure, but that is not how magic works. When I tried to explain that to him, he became enraged. He pleaded for her life, but that was not mine to give her.” A pain grips Enny’s chest. She knew this story very well.

“That’s the same in my world.” They both sit in silence as Rasmodius sets a book in front of Enny.

“This text speaks briefly of the blade of the desert. It claims it has magical properties, but very little is known about it. There is no known creator, and believed to be a myth as no one had ever laid eyes on it.”

“That’s it?” A hint of irritation in her voice.

“It is said to have simply appeared, as if born from the earth itself. Many believed its purpose was to protect the land, but how is unclear. I am awaiting a response from another wizard much older than I who may have the answers we seek.” Enny sighs while rubbing her forehead.

“Okay, did you find out anything else about the creature?” His silence weighs heavily in the room.

“Tell me about your experiences with Leah,” he finally speaks.

“Right. Uh, she was close to my grandpa, like really close. They weren’t in my world. She also said I wrote my grandpa letters, but again, I didn’t.”

“I see.” He looks concerned.

“What does that mean?”

“I am not sure. It seems perplexing how some things are exactly the same, while others are fundamentally different, as in the case of your farm. I will soon meet with the council of this region to discuss your situation. I hope to have more answers then.”

“When are you meeting them?” The look of hesitation on his face tells Enny she will not like the answer.

“In two months’ time, after the start of fall.”

“Two months ! Are you fucking kidding me? I need to go home now !” She jumps to her feet shouting.

“I am sorry child. That is the soonest the council can convene. I will continue my efforts until then, in hopes of a solution.” Enny stands there in disbelief at his words. Two months. How can I survive two more months? 

“Ras, there has to be something I can do,” she pleads. “It’s only been two weeks and I’m dying here.”

“You can venture back to the desert in search of the blade. I have an auspicious feeling that we will need it to send you home.”

“It’s not that easy,” she rubs her forehead in frustration. “I need a prismatic shard and the only one I ever found was in those damn desert caves and I can’t get to the caves without the weird fucking key at the bottom of the mines and it took me months to get that far down and even longer until I found that stupid fucking shard,” anger burns in her throat. She pauses, closing her eyes and grinding her teeth. There are worse ways to spend her time. Marlon gave her that sword, so she can make some real progress through the mines. It is a naturally calming space for her too. “Okay,” she lets out a heavy breath. “Yeah, I’ll do it. I’ll go find the sword,” she concedes.

“I give you my sincerest apologies. I do wish to have given you more insight into your situation.”

“It’s fine. Is there anything else you want to know?” She stands, ready to leave before the frustration boils over.

“What of your dreams? Have there been any changes?”

“If you mean am I still having them, then yeah, I’m still having them,” she says with an edge to her voice. “They’re pretty random, but they seem to line up with when I first moved here.”

“Interesting.”

“What are you thinking, Ras?”

“I am not sure as of yet what this means.”

“Okay…is there anything else?”

“No, that shall be sufficient for now. Please come see me if you learn anything new. I will call for you if I learn more.”

Shane walks up, practically skipping, to the outdoor stage. It’s adorned with white roses and an arch made of vines and branches. He takes the mic from the stand and motions for the band to announce his entrance. While they play his entrance song, he takes one long look at the crowd. His family and friends are dressed in elaborate dresses and tuxedos, underneath the glow of a thousand lights strung up above their heads. He thought it would be tacky, but is truly mesmerized to see so many lights under the canopy. 

As the song finishes, he finally speaks, “I would like to introduce for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Stellaaaaaaaa!” The crowd cheers and screams. He waits for them to die down before turning to the two most important people in his life, Stella and Derick. “I’ll never forget the day these two first met. Stella and I were about 6 or 7 and skipping stones out at the lake. I was obviously much better than her…she definitely didn’t have to help me. That’s why it was so surprising when this punk kid showed up and started laughing at me. He said I skipped stones like a girl. Before I could get a word out, Stella ran right up to him and pushed him off the pier and into the lake. He let out a squeal and she was quick to comment on how lady-like he was. I stood there in shock. Mostly because I was an excellent stone skipper, but also because I had never seen Stella so mad.” 

“Hey!” Derick shouts. “It was a cheap shot!”

“Sure, sure it was Dare Bear.” The room fills with laughter once again. “Those two fought constantly after that. They always had to one up the other. When we moved out here to Zuzu, I was genuinely worried for Derick’s safety. What I didn’t expect was to come home to them making out in the stairwell.” He stops to look at the couple. “Gross guys, that stairwell could give you herpes just by looking at it.”

“Where do you think the stairwell got it from?” Stella chimes in, adding a cheeky grin and wink at the end. 

“Okay Stella, calm down,” he says, mimicking disgust. Obviously, I was worried it wouldn’t last. How could I possibly choose between these two when they inevitably broke up? As they turned their bullying towards me, I found myself hoping they WOULD break up.” The crowd boos, led by Stella, while Derick gives him a thumbs down and shakes his head. He waits for the disapproval to stop before saying. “Imagine my surprise the day they walked into the apartment with Stella flashing some serious bling. I knew the torture would never end.” Shane gives an exasperated look before finally turning back to the happy couple. A large smile spreads across his face as he says, “You’re both my best friends. I see the joy you bring each other, and frustration. You have more passion for each other in a single day than others do in a lifetime. You’re the most authentic and caring people I have ever had the pleasure to know. I know I’m better just for knowing you. I love you both so much. Congratulations.” With that the crowd breaks out into raucous cheers. Stella and Derick walk over to Shane to envelope him in a hug. The three stand there, crying tears of joy. 

When they finally break their huddle, Stella grabs the mic and screams.

“It’s time for shots!” With that, the reception turns into one of their most memorable parties.

Shane wakes up crying. He stares at the ceiling, watching the fan spin. It’s always spinning. It doesn’t even know how sad its life is. Everyday, it works to serve others, never knowing of anything outside of this pathetic room. 

He would give anything for the dreams to end. They come to him every night, so he can never forget what he did. His eternal hell.

He pulls himself out of bed and reaches for the bottle on his nightstand, but it’s empty. I’ll have to go to Pierre’s to get through this morning. He grumbles as he gets dressed and heads out the door. Pierre might not carry hard liquor, but he can at least get a 6-pack.

He walks past the empty kitchen and looks towards Marnie’s desk. It is also empty, and he is thankful not to face her today. She has never blamed him directly, but he sees the condemnation under her smile. 

Outside, he is greeted by an enthusiastic Jas. She runs and jumps into his arms before he has time to react. The force nearly knocks him over, but he can’t help but smile. He has never loved anyone as much as he loves her. You know she deserves better than you. No amount of love will ever make up for what you did.

He regains his composure and puts space between them.

“Morning blackbird.”

“Hi Shaney!” She beams. “I have something to show you!”

“What’s that?” She pulls out her jump rope and begins skipping backwards with it. “Look! I can finally go backwards!” Just as she says that the rope hits her ankle, tripping her in the process. She falls on her butt and looks up at Shane with shame in her eyes.

“Jas, are you okay?” He leans down to pick her up. Clearly embarrassed, she cries into his arms.

“I practiced so hard.” She sniffles.

“Hey, shhh, you did great! You’re getting better every day.”

“You really think so?” She wipes away her tears.

“I know so.” He looks at her with all the love in the world.

“Okay, I believe you. Thanks, Shaney.” She kisses his cheek and jumps down. “Next time, I’ll be the best jump roper ever.” She runs away towards the lone cherry blossom tree. You don’t deserve her affection.

He sighs and heads in the other direction into town. It’s late in the morning and the town is already buzzing. He tries to avoid meeting anyone’s gaze by keeping his head down and hood up. He hurries himself into Pierre’s shop.

He walks in and sees that fucking farmer at the counter. The sight of her reignites his anger. Whatever innocence she feigns, he knows the truth. She’s a fucking creep who scared Jas. He thinks back to last night at the bar. That panic attack was probably just another way to manipulate the people of this town.

He won’t be so easily fooled. He tries to ignore her as he walks over to the cooler. He grabs the cheapest beer he sees and gets in line behind her. She sure is taking her sweet time.

“100 g’s for cauliflower seeds?” She tries to keep her voice from yelling. “That’s a rip off.”

“Are you accusing me of marking up my product?” His voice is thick with contention. Enny seethes but doesn’t respond. “If you want a better deal, we could come to an arrangement.”

“What kind of arrangement?” She does a poor job reigning in her anger. 

“Buy exclusively from me and I’ll give you 20% off.” He grins, knowing she can’t resist that price compared to Joja’s.

“80 g’s is what it should be.”

“Look, that’s still better than you’ll get anywhere else. Take it or leave it.” 

“Does that include the phone?” 

“Absolutely not,” Pierre practically beams.

She throws her money on the counter and angrily grabs the seeds.

“You’re a fucking crook,” she spits out.

“Thank you for your business, Farmer Enny. I will see you again real soon,” he says with all the smugness in the world.

She storms out and he can’t help but laugh. Pierre is a crook, but no one ever has the balls to tell him. Maybe there’s some depth to this girl after all. 

“You’re earlier than usual,” he smirks at Shane. He’s clearly high from the adrenaline of his win over the farmer.

“I was worried the piss water would jump off the shelves,” he retorts. Pierre’s smile drops slightly.

“Shane, I’m sure you know very well that I only sell top quality products. If you are not satisfied, then I’m sure Joja would love your business.” That evil smirk returns in full force.

Pierre knows Shane can’t buy from Joja. They will get suspicious and eventually figure out that he drinks before and during work. 

“And miss these lovely interactions? Where else will I get my daily dose of trash?” He throws the money at Pierre and walks out with his beer. He’s met headfirst with the farmer.

“Watch where you’re going,” he barks.

“Move asshole, that fucking thief ripped me off. He shorted me a pack of seeds.”

“It’s your fault for not checking back inside. He’ll never give it to you now.” She seems to ponder that for a moment before deflating.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. That guy just pisses me off so much.” Shane gives a sympathetic laugh.

“Yeah, me too,” he agrees with a nod. “Most people don’t tell him off like you though.”

“I’ve dealt with that kind of bullshit for too long to put up with it here. I just have to ride it out until I can start producing my own seeds.” He wonders if he could make his own beer. “Look, about the other day.” She pulls him out of his head. “I’m really sorry I scared Jas. I swear it was an accident and I won’t do anything like that again.”

He considers her words for a moment. She seems genuine, but the reminder of that day fuels the rage he bears for her. 

“Just stay away from her.” He tries to hold back his anger. “Don’t you have work to do?” He gives her no time to respond and walks past her, hitting her shoulder with his own on the way.

He doesn’t even bother waiting to get back to Marnie’s. He opens a can and starts drinking right there in the middle of town.

Chapter Text

There’s an egg festival today that Enny thoroughly planned on missing, but Jas asked her to go. She told the young girl she didn’t think she could, but the next day Marnie showed up at Enny’s door. 

“Hi Enny. I’m here to ask you if you’d reconsider going to the egg festival. Jas talks about you all the time and really wants you there. It would mean a lot to her.”

What was she supposed to say? ‘No, I’m a monster and want that little girl to cry!’ Insert evil laugh here.

So, here she is, at this egg festival, trying to disappear into the hedges. It’s terrifying to be around this many people who Enny swears are all staring at her. It’s like they know she doesn't belong here.

She gets the courage to walk over and talk to Penny and Maru a little. Maru welcomes her, talking about how important the event is to the community, while Penny dotes on Jas and Vincent. Eventually, Enny wanders off and finds Marlon. Together, they stare at the townspeople and joke about the variety of egg dishes.

Suddenly, Jas spots her and runs squealing up to Enny. 

“Enny, you came!” Yoba, she’s adorable, Enny thinks. “It’s time for the egg hunt!” She grabs her hand and pulls Enny to the town square. She looks at Marlon who has a huge shit eating grin plastered on his face. Traitor .

Enny tries to say no, but Jas seems so happy and she can’t ruin that. She normally carries a sort of sadness on her face that extends far beneath the surface. If this will take some of that pain away, then Enny will do it. She’s far too young for whatever pain she went through. 

Enny feels awkward playing against a bunch of kids, but luckily, a couple of other adults join too. As soon as the mayor says go, Enny grabs Jas’s hand and they sprint off towards the southern houses. She spots a blue striped egg behind the house and Jas quickly scoops it up. Enny does a quick look around and sees some pink sticking out from behind a bush. Again, she pulls her towards it for the little girl to grab. They continue like this until the mayor calls the end of the hunt.

They walk back to the square, panting and laughing. She doesn’t even care about the stares around her. For a moment, she forgets everything she was running from. She needed this as much as Jas did. 

“And the winner is…..Jas and Enny!” The mayor calls.

“Enny, I’ve never won!” She screams in excitement. 

“It was all you bunny rabbit.” She smiles hard enough to hurt her cheeks.

They go up to collect the prizes and the mayor hands Jas a plush pink bunny with a purple bow that matches her own. He then turns to Enny and offers her the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen, a golden-straw hat. No longer will my head be a victim to the sun!

“Absolutely fucking not,” Enny angrily breathes out upon waking up. After her awkward run in with Shane and the panic attack at the bar, she thinks it’s better to avoid the town and festival today. 

It’s not like Shane will let her get near Jas and honestly, Jas seems avoidant of her whenever she passes her in the woods. She’s still scared of me. Enny tries to ignore how much that hurts.

It’s hard for Enny to see Jas this young and not think of Izzy. She’s done what she can to avoid thinking about her daughter since she showed up here, because every time her thoughts drift that way, she can't breathe. She sees her everywhere, dancing as a ghost through the world. The beach is the hardest, but she avoids it as much as she can. She can’t avoid Sebastian though, and that wound just keeps festering every time she sees him.

I hate this place. She thinks over and over again. She needs to find something to do today to keep her occupied, but the town is completely off limits, and Leah and Marlon will no doubt be there too. So, she won’t have anyone to talk to. 

She thinks back to what the wizard said about the mines. She always did like being in the mines. She has a sword now, albeit a shitty one, and could make a small dent in the mountain monsters. Enny quickly waters her plants and races up to the mountain with some food she bought from Gus yesterday.

It’s a nice quiet walk. She isn’t afraid of running into anyone and it’s freeing. She can relax for what feels like the first time since she’s been here. She follows the path behind Robin’s cabin into the woods. Her phone vibrates in her pocket and she pulls it out to see a message from Leah.

Leah: Girllll, where are you?

Enny: Not there

Leah: Clearly. Are you always such a smartass?

Enny: Who am I to deny my true self?

Leah: Fine. Be difficult. I’ll just be over here eating every version of egg imaginable

Leah: Marlon told me to tell you he’s upset you’re not here too

Leah: Really sounds like you’re a monster

Enny: I think you’ll get over it. How’s Emily?

Leah: I have no idea what you’re talking about….

Emily: Hi Enny! This is Emily!

Enny:  Haha hey Emily. How’s the festival?

Emily: It’s great. The sun is shining and the whole town is here

Enny: That sounds fun

Emily: Then why aren’t you here?

Enny: Damn alright lol. I hear you both. 

Enny: Oh…no…wa…it…

Enny: …I’m goi…ough…tunn…l…

Enny: Go on without me!

Enny: Eat all the eggs

She pockets her phone before either can respond.

“Enny, right?” She nearly jumps out of her skin at the sudden voice breaking her tranquility.  

“Good Yoba, Linus, you nearly gave me a fucking heart attack.” 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He looks genuinely apologetic. “I wanted to thank you for the leek the other day. It was a sweet gift.”

“Oh, yeah. I just saw it on my way up and thought you might enjoy it. I know you enjoy foraging.”

“How do you know that?” He asks suspiciously.

“Oh, I mean, it was just a guess. You have to get your food from somewhere,” Enny smiles awkwardly and rubs the back of her neck. “It was good to see you again. I’ve got to get going though.” She spins around and continues to the mines at a much faster pace.

I really need to be more careful . The entrance comes into view, and she practically sprints to get inside. Damn, I never did get to fix that elevator. She has to start back at level 1. 

It doesn’t take long for her to clear those first 5 levels again now that she has an actual sword. She’s also prepared with food, so she doesn’t pass out again. The green slimes give her little problems, and the giant flying bugs are more annoying than dangerous. 

She reaches the 5 th floor and finds the elevator again. Once fixed, she sits down for a snack. She brought some salad from Gus’s. It’s perfect, light but energizing. After eating, she continues down.

Eventually, she encounters a rock crab trying to hide in the corner of the cavern.

“Hey little fella. I wondered when I’d start seeing you.” As much as she hates killing them, she needs the little crabs for the community center. She hasn’t been back to it since her run in with Sebastian, but she suspects they’ll still set her up with supplies for her ‘gifts.’ 

She continues another 5 floors to the next elevator shaft. Again, she fixes it and takes a short break. She munches on her salad when she hears something from deeper down the shaft. She stops chewing and leans over the hole while she waits for it to make another sound. A low growl emanates from the hole, and she instinctively runs back away from the ladder.

She falls on her butt and just stares at the opening. Nothing comes from it, and she hears no further sounds, but her nerves don’t listen to her when she tells them she’s safe. She checks her phone and it’s well after 8pm. Good time as any to go home.

She packs up her stuff and walks to the elevator. She gets in but doesn’t take her eyes off that opening until the doors close. She shakes off that creepy feeling and leaves the mines. She’s careful to avoid anyone, someone , on her way home, but her mind keeps going back to that growl. 

She falls asleep hearing it, as if it followed her home. 

“Uncle Shane,” Derick softly says as to not wake the baby, “are you ready to meet your niece?” Shane nervously reaches out to grab this tiny little alien. He feels awkward trying to cradle her in his arms. He looks at her sleeping face and jet-black hair. Instantly, he knows he would do anything for this baby. She is perfect and made by perfect people.

“Hi Jas,” he whispers while grabbing her hand, “I’m Shane. Together, we’re going to drive your parents crazy.”

As usual, Shane wakes up silently crying. He stares at the ceiling fan and wonders how it feels, not knowing pain or regret. The only thing that fan has to do is spin in a circle all day. It doesn’t carry any guilt or shame. It doesn’t have to look in the broken eyes that he caused to fade. It doesn’t have to face the piercing eyes of everyone in town. They all know.

He pulls himself to sit at the side of his bed and sobs into his hands. He reaches over and finds a half full bottle of cheap whiskey. He made sure to buy extra from Gus last night, knowing he wouldn’t be able to buy anything today at the egg festival.

He feels a momentary warmth flutter through his chest at the thought of how hard his chickens have worked, but it is quickly extinguished by the shame he feels for finding any joy in life. Nope. Too early for this shit. He opens the bottle and drinks nearly half of what’s left. That should help.

Shane gets dressed and heads out to the coop. He finds about a dozen more eggs that he can bring to Gus. He’s whipping up every egg dish he knows and needs all the eggs Shane and Marnie can supply. 

He carefully places each egg into an egg carton and heads over to the saloon. He feels a little lighter as the alcohol seeps into his brain. It’s the closest feeling to contentment Shane can manage. He isn’t happy, but he isn’t actively hurting. It’s his very own booze fueled purgatory.

Chapter Text

The tall, slender man in the hoodie as dark as his eyes just stares at Enny speechless. She looks expectantly as she holds out the blood red tulip for him to take. He looks down at the flower then back to her.

“It’s a gift.” Enny smiles at Sebastian.

“It’s a pretty terrible gift,” he responds bluntly. Her face deflates and her hand with the flower drops down to her side.

“Right, sorry.” She looks at the ground.

“Why would you even give me a gift? I don’t know you.” A mix of irritation and indifference flows from his voice.

“I’m just trying to get to know people in the town better. Lewis suggested I give people gifts. So here I am.” He lets out a long plume of smoke before responding.

“That seems like a pretty inauthentic way to get people to like you.” She hadn’t thought of it that way, but he isn’t wrong.

“You’re actually kind of right,” her voice emphasizes the ‘actually.’

“What? Like I can’t actually be right about anything?” He puts the same emphasis on ‘actually.’

“No! No, not at all, that’s, sorry I don’t think that at all,” she stammers, “I was just surprised to hear it—”

“From me?” Her face turns bright red as a smile stretches across Sebastian’s face. She pauses for a moment before scrunching her face up into a tightly wound ball.

“You asshole!” She screams. “You’re just fucking with me!” He lets out the warmest laugh and Enny melts into his voice. What she would give to hear it again.

“You’re pretty easy to fuck with.” He offers her a drag of his cigarette as a show of no animosity.

“Gross,” She practically hits it out of his hand. “Get that trash away from me.” 

“Easy, killer.” He laughs again. “Seriously though, that’s a pretty bad gift.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” she looks solemnly at the flower, “I should have known that someone so heartless could never appreciate real beauty.” A sly smile tugs at the corner of her mouth.

He puts out his cigarette and pockets the butt. With his nonsmoking hand he cups her face and brings it closer to his own. He leans in until she can feel his warm breath against her cheek. Her heart races, threatening to beat out of her chest at the sudden intimacy.

“Sweet flower, I can appreciate real beauty just fine.” His voice is soft, barely above a whisper. It surges through her as he strokes a piece of hair behind her ear. She tries to speak, but no sound escapes her lips. “It’s not my fault your gift just sucks.”

Reality snaps back to Enny.

“What’s your Yoba fucking problem!?” She screams as she pulls away from his hand. He laughs loudly at her reaction.

“No problem here.” He grins. “Try better next time.” With that, he casually turns around and heads back toward his home. 

“You think I’m going to bring you another gift?” She screams at him as he leaves. “Fat chance My Chem!”

He just laughs harder and gives a noncommittal wave as he disappears.

Enny wakes up crying. That was the first time they ever spoke. He was such a smug asshole, and she was far too much into it. He made her feel something she hadn’t felt in a long time. He made her feel alive. She spent so long just going with the motions of life. She felt detached from reality and rarely made any real connections. 

Despite how angry he made her, she was determined to give him a gift he liked. Somehow, she felt she would win that way. She definitely didn’t do it because she wanted to feel him that close again. Definitely not.

She thinks about that Sebastian compared to this one. He did suffer from anxiety and panic attacks, but he never tried to kill himself. He was also happier when they met, or at least livelier. He wasn’t brimming with happiness, but he still found joy in daily things.

She hasn’t seen that side of this Sebastian, only despair. Enny suspects it’s not just around her considering Leah’s revelation. It pains Enny to know he went through that. He might be a different Sebastian, but she’d be lying if she says she doesn’t care about him. It’s impossible not to. He is another version of the man she loves. They likely share more than just looks. Fundamentally, he may be the same Sebastian.

She shakes those thoughts out of her head. Enny plans to commission Robin for a coop today, but she’s a little short on wood. So, she needs to get up, water her crops, and clear some trees. She has more energy these days and feels confident she can get enough wood before Robin closes the shop.

She grabs her bag and heads outside. Enny is met with a sky blanketed in layers of dreary, gray clouds. I wonder if it’ll rain. She decides it’s better to cut some trees down first. If it does rain, she won’t need to water her crops and chopping down trees is infinitely times harder when her tools are wet. 

She still has plenty of trees on this land, so she can work close to the cabin. She pulls out her ax and starts on the nearest to her porch. She manages to get through a decent number of trees, enough that she’ll have plenty of wood left over for a preserves jar. Just as she takes down the last tree, rain begins to fall from the sky. The coolness of the water with the breeze feels refreshing against her hot skin. She only takes a moment to enjoy it before rushing to get her wood stored, setting aside the necessary materials for Robin for easy access tomorrow. 

Enny turns to the mountain path, feeling a spring in her step from the drizzle only for it to be replaced by a pit in her stomach. She doesn’t feel good about possibly running into Sebastian, but she needs more than just crops on this shitty beach farm. If she’s going to be here for two more months, she’s going to need a better source of income. Animals are easier to tend to, which gives her more time in the mines.

Robin’s cabin comes into view and Enny feels her heart race. Just breathe. In, hold it, out . She closes her eyes and repeats the ritual until her body relaxes. She opens her eyes and quickly walks up to the door, but freezes as she grabs the handle. Come on Enny, just open it. In and out, real quick.

She no longer has to make the choice as the door swings open, pulling her hand still attached to the knob with it. She falls forward through the door and into something hard. More accurately, someone hard. 

Two arms wrap around her, holding her as they both fall to the floor with a thud. Enny looks up and is dangerously close to Sebastian’s face. Close enough to smell that smokey pine on his hoodie. Close enough to feel his lips brush against her cheek. She only needs to tilt her face slightly towards his to feel those lips on her own. She realizes she is lying on top of him, straddling his leg. He shifts his leg under her, and her body begs to grind up against it.

“Enny! Sebastian!” Robin screams. “Are you okay?” She rushes out from behind the counter, breaking the trance Sebastian has her in. She jumps up and off him, feeling the residual heat between her legs. 

“Sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to fall into you and, well knock you down with me, and um for—” he cuts her off. 

“It’s fine. Really.” He slowly climbs to his feet, watching Enny the entire time.

“Enny, are you okay?” Robin asks again, more calmly.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m fine. More embarrassed than anything.” 

“Don’t be sorry! I’m just glad you’re okay. Sebby, are you okay?” She looks towards her son.

“Yeah, fine.” His eyes are locked onto Enny.

“I should really get going.” Enny starts to back up towards the door.

“Wait. Did you need something from the shop?” Robin asks.

“Oh, yeah, but it’s not important. I can come back later.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You came all this way through the rain. What can I get you?” Robin’s smile easily disarms Enny.

“Oh, well, I came to ask if you’d build me a coop. I have the supplies.” Sebastian stands frozen, staring at her every movement.

“Oh, of course! Come over here and let me go over all the details.” She ushers Enny to the counter. “Sebby, will you wait so you can walk her back through this rain?” 

“That’s really not necessary.” Enny interjects, waving her hands in front of her. “It’s just rain and I’m already—”

“I’ll do it.” He says without hesitation.

“Great! Thanks Sebby. Okay, let’s get you set up.”

Time seems to stop as Enny tries to force words out. She knows Robin’s saying something, but she could be talking about a falling meteor for all she knows. Finally, Robin stops, and Enny thinks she’s waiting for her to say something.

“Dear? Are you okay?” She looks concerned.

“Ye-yeah, I’m sorry. Just a little spacey. What did you say?” She feels Sebastian’s eyes boring into her.

“You said you have the materials, right? Are they with you now?”

“Um, no. I left them at the farm so you wouldn’t have to carry them back down. Is that okay?”

“Of course! That’s a lot easier for me.” She smiles. “Okay, if that’s everything, I’ll be down first thing in the morning to get started.”

“T-thank you, Robin. I really appreciate this,” Enny says. She turns around to face Sebastian but can’t bring herself to meet his gaze. “You really don’t need to come with me. I’ll be fine.”

“Come on, let’s get going.” He doesn’t even acknowledge her words, just motions her to walk to the door, never taking his eyes off her. 

She steps out on the porch and thinks her heart will break free from her chest. She’s supposed to be avoiding this man, but keeps running into him. He pulls out an umbrella and joins her at her side. Together they walk down the steps. 

Enny doesn’t dare look at Sebastian. She keeps her eyes on the ever-disappearing horizon in the rain. Sebastian can’t pull his eyes away from her face. After a long, uncomfortable silence, Sebastian breaks the quiet.

“Have we met before?” He sounds serious.

“Um, I don’t think so.” It isn’t exactly a lie. “Maybe when we were kids. I used to come here during the summers to visit my grandpa.”

“Yeah, maybe,” disappointment fills his voice.

Enny risks a look in his direction and sees him look thoughtfully into the ground. Her heart aches for this man.

“Are you okay?” She whispers.

He picks his head up and looks into her eyes. Shit . She could never look away from the intensity of his eyes. They burn black and pull her in, leaving her helpless. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. You just knocked me over. It takes more than that to take me out.” A brief glint flashes in his eyes.

“I mean…” She trails off.

“You mean what?”

“Just, you know, that night by the lake.” Only partly a lie. 

“Oh,” for a moment, she sees pain flash across his face, but it is quickly replaced by something less real. “Yeah, I’m okay. It happens sometimes. What about you?”

“What about me?” 

“Are you okay, after the other night at the bar?” His voice is thick with concern.

“Oh, that,” she already purged that memory, “I’m okay. It happens sometimes,” she echoes his own words.

“Right.” His voice has a hint of disappointment.

The rest of the walk is silent, full of unspoken tension. Once the cabin comes into view, Enny picks up her pace while Sebastian meets it. As they round the porch, she races up the stairs.

“Okay, thanks for, well, the umbrella, I guess.” She looks back to give him a quick smile and quickly turns back to the door. Before she can walk through, he gently grabs her wrist. His grip is light, almost not there, but it feels like a chain pulling her to him.

Neither of them says a word. Enny looks down at the water streaming down the stairs, motionless. Her wrist feels aflame from the contact, urging her to reach out for him. Before she can act on the temptation, he releases her. 

She pauses for a moment, before running inside without another word. She closes the door behind her and falls to the ground crying. It is too painful to see her husband’s face on someone else.

“What’s your Yoba fucking problem?” The farmer screams as she pulls away from his hand. He laughs loudly at her reaction.

“No problem here.” He grins. “Try better next time.” With that, he turns around and heads back toward his home. 

“You think I’m going to bring you another gift?” She screams after him as he leaves. “Fat chance My Chem!”

He just laughs harder and gives a noncommittal wave as he disappears. He enjoys how easily flustered she is. He also likes the feeling left on his hand from touching her face.

Sebastian wakes up to a throbbing in his pants, demanding his attention. He still feels the warmth in his hand from his dream, and his body begs to feel it too. He palms himself over his pants and thrusts into his bed.

“Fuck.” He breathes as he strokes himself. He thinks of those wet lips around it instead of his hand, sliding over his head, down his shaft. What he would give to lace his fingers through her soft hair while he fucks her face. To hear her soft mewls and gasps, while she chokes on his dick. He thrusts harder into his bed, wishing it were her.

His phone goes off on the nightstand, momentarily snapping him out of his fantasy. He pushes it from his mind and goes back to her and those perfect lips. It goes off again, then a third time, and he can’t ignore it anymore. He grabs it and quickly glances at the missed messages, all from Sam.

Sam : Hey man, what’s up?

Sam : Duuudddddeeeee wake upppppp

Sam : I’m borrrrreeeeeedddddddd

Sam : Sebastian

Sam : Sebastian

Sam : Sebastian

Sam : Sebastian

Fuck . Sam is equal parts persistent and annoying.

Sebastian: What do you want Sam?

Sam : You’re alive!

Sebastian: Yeah, now what?

Sam : Look. I know things have been weird since the other night at the bar. You missed band practice and have barely said two words to me since

Sam : Talk to me man

He couldn’t deny things had been weird. He left Enny’s that night and realized what happened. He just left Abby at the bar to take another woman home. He tried calling her, but it went straight to voicemail. She hasn’t talked to him since.

Sebastian: Yeah, okay you’re right. Can I come over?

Sam : Hell yes!

Sam : Get yo ass over here!

Sebastian: Alright. Leaving soon

He doesn’t know what’s wrong with him. Why does he keep having these dreams? Why does he feel so drawn to Enny. They’ve barely spoken, but he felt his stomach drop to the floor with her at the bar. He wanted to take care of her, make sure she was safe. Has he ever really felt that way?

He shakes the thoughts off and grabs his clothes, unsatisfied. He heads upstairs and stops in the kitchen for a quick cup of coffee. He finishes and walks past his mom towards the door.

“I’m heading to Sam’s. I’ll see you later,” he calls.

“Bye Sebby,” she smiles over her own coffee, “have fun.”

He opens the door and is hit by a blur falling through the door. He instinctively throws his arms around the assailant and together they fall back. He nearly gets the wind knocked out of him, but he stops breathing regardless when he looks down into the face from his dream. 

Her alluring eyes shine in a deep blue. Her lips slightly part, sending a wave of lust through his body. He becomes very aware of how his leg pushes in between hers. He hardens under her and shifts his leg to hide it.

“Enny! Sebastian!” Robin screams. “Are you okay?” She rushes out from behind the counter as Enny jumps up and off him . Shit. Did she feel that? 

“Sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to fall into you and, well knock you down with me, and um for—” he cuts her off. 

“It’s fine. Really.” She definitely felt it.  

“Enny, are you okay?” Robin asks again.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m fine. More embarrassed than anything.” 

“Don’t be sorry! I’m just glad you’re okay. Sebby, are you okay?” She looks towards her son.

“Yeah, fine.” He can’t pull his eyes away from Enny.

“I should really get going.” He wants to reach out and stop her.

“Wait. Did you need something from the shop?” Robin asks.

“Oh, yeah, but it’s not important. I can come back later.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You came all this way through the rain. What can I get you?” 

“Oh, well, I came to ask if you’d build me a coop. I have the supplies.” He can’t move. He’s completely captivated by her.

“Oh, of course! Come over here and let me go over all the details.” She ushers Enny to the counter. “Sebby, will you wait so you can walk her back through this rain?”

“That’s really not necessary.” Enny interjects, waving her hands in front of her. “It’s just rain and I’m already—”

“I’ll do it.” I’ll do what?  

He doesn’t hear much after that, the world is drowned out by the sound of his heart against his chest and the blood rushing to his head, both heads.

She finally turns towards him but refuses to look up. “You really don’t need to come with me. I’ll be fine.”

“Come on, let’s get going.” 

He follows her out and opens the umbrella for them. The proximity has his pants tightening again.

“Have we met before?” He needs a distraction.

“Um, I don’t think so. Maybe when we were kids. I used to come here during the summers to visit my grandpa.”

“Yeah, maybe.” He had always heard about her, they all had, but no one ever met the farmer’s granddaughter.

“Are you okay?” She whispers.

No.

“Yeah, I’m okay. You just knocked me over. It takes more than that to take me out.” 

“I mean…” She trails off.

“You mean what?”

“Just, you know, that night by the lake.” Somehow, he had forgotten about that. It feels like a lifetime ago. 

“Oh, yeah, I’m okay. It happens sometimes. What about you?” He watches as her face falls and contorts into sadness.

“What about me?” She seems defensive.

“Are you okay, after the other night at the bar?” Maybe she’s defensive when she’s vulnerable. Why the fuck do I care about her vulnerabilities?

“Oh, that, I’m okay. It happens sometimes.”

“Right.” About as forthcoming as himself.

They walk awkwardly in silence the rest of the way. She starts to pick up the pace when she sees the cabin and at the steps, she rushes away from him.

“Okay, thanks for, well, the umbrella, I guess.” 

Before he understands what she said, his hand grabs her wrist. The sudden touch electrifies him, and he can’t bring himself to let go. The silence lasts too long when Sebastian’s brain finally catches up. He lets go, but she still doesn’t look at him. After a moment, she disappears into the cabin.

He stares at the door she escaped through. What the fuck is wrong with you? He wants to run in there. He wants to hold her in his arms again. He wants to feel those lips and every part of her body. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

He’s acting like an idiot over someone he doesn’t even know, while his actual girlfriend thinks he’s lying to her about said someone. Fuck . He pulls out a cigarette and lets the rain wash over him as he walks to Sam’s.

The walk feels too short, likely because he doesn’t want to explain to Sam about what’s going on. Do I even understand what’s going on ? He really doesn’t. He turns past Marnie’s and shortly after sees Sam’s house. He reluctantly walks in and takes off his shoes, so he doesn’t track in mud. 

“Oh, hi Sebastian,” Jodi calls from the kitchen. “Sam is in his room.” 

“Thanks.”

He walks over to Sam’s room and hesitates to turn the knob. Come on Sebastian. Get your shit together . He wills himself to open the door and walk in.

“Sebbbbbyyyyyyyyy!” Sam shouts. “You really are alive. I thought someone might have stolen your phone.”

“Sadly, yes, I’m here.” Shit. I shouldn’t have said that. Sam’s face drops. “A joke. I swear.” 

“Right,” Sam’s smile comes back, but not as big. “I’m just glad you’re here.” There seems to be more to that statement, but Sebastian dismisses it. “So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

“What are you talking about?” He feigns ignorance while rubbing the back of his neck.

“Don’t be like that man. What happened at Gus’s? You just left with that farmer you supposedly don’t really know.” His voice is accusatory.

“Right. That.” He looks at the floor. “Honestly, I don’t know. I acted without even thinking.”

“I hate to ask,” Sam starts but hesitates before finishing, “is there, you know, something going on between you two?”

“No,” Sebastian answers quickly. “It’s not like that at all.” Guilt and disappointment wage a war through his words.

“Then, what is it? Because it looks pretty fucking suspicious. You lied to Abby about her and then left with her.”

Sebastian chokes up but doesn’t respond.

“Come on man, you can talk to me. What’s going on?”

“I, don’t know.” Sebastian’s throat tightens as the panic settles in. His breathing becomes erratic and Sam notices immediately.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” He grabs his shoulder to try and console him. “We don’t have to talk about it.”

“I just need to go out for a smoke.”

“Okay, let me go with you.” It’s not a question.

Sebastian bolts for the door with Sam on his heels. He doesn’t even put his shoes on, just rushes out the door. 

“Seb! Your shoes,” Sam calls, but Sebastian can’t hear him over his inner turmoil. 

Sebastian lights a cigarette feeling the cold wet ground under his feet. Sam rushes out to him, shoeless. They both stand there in the quiet as the rain pours down on them.

“I’m worried about you,” Sam finally breaks the silence.

“I know.”

“Please, talk to me.”

“You’ll think I’m crazy. I think I’m crazy.”

“You know you can tell me anything,” Sam practically pleads.

“I…” Sebastian can’t find the right words, “I’ve been having weird dreams.”

“You’re telling me this is about dreams?” Sam says with genuine concern. “Are they back?” He is too familiar with Sebastian’s nightmares.

“Not exactly. I’ve been having these weird dreams lately. They’re not like the, well, the other ones. They’re about the new farmer.” Sam remains quiet, letting Sebastian talk at his own pace. “But they started before I met her and they’re, well, weird. Sometimes they’re just random meetings, others, she’s just a flash in it, but they feel real and they’re getting more intense. Then she showed up and I felt this connection. No, not that, it’s like something is pulling me towards her. I keep running into her. She found me having a panic attack and immediately knew what to do before running off. There’s so much tension between us every time I see her. I don’t know, it’s probably just in my head.” He pauses before continuing. “Then she fell at Gus’s and my brain just shut off. My body moved and I was just there. I was so scared. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.” Sebastian is visibly shaking, and Sam reaches out to him.

“Sebastian,” Sam’s voice is low, “there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s definitely weird, but you’re not crazy.”

“How can you say that?” Sebastian’s voice gets louder, more desperate. “I just told you I’ve been dreaming about a girl I hadn’t even met and can’t stop thinking about her and it’s just normal?” He shouts. “That’s not fu—” Sam cuts him off.

“I’ve been dreaming about her too!” He shouts. Sebastian stares in disbelief at his friend’s confession. “It’s just bits and pieces. Like once, I passed her on my skateboard. Another time, she laughed at a pool shot I missed,” he pauses for a moment. “I know it seems weird,” Sam sighs. “But everyone was talking about her before she showed up. It’s probably just the excitement of someone new coming to Stardew.

“Yeah,” Sebastian thinks back to his dream. “You’re probably right,” but the explanation leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. 

“Sebastian,” Sam breaks his thoughts. “You need to talk to Abby.”

“I know, but what can I say? Hey, I promise I’m not cheating, I’m just a little obsessed with another girl.” Sebastian mocks. 

“Well, do you still want to be with Abby?” It’s a simple question, but Sebastian isn’t sure anymore.

“I mean, Abby is real. Whatever is happening, it’s in my head. I can’t throw away a real relationship for a few dreams.” Right?

“Okay,” Sam draws out that last syllable, “you don’t sound real convincing. Abby thinks you’re hiding something from her. That you might be cheating. You need to talk to her.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Sebastian looks down at the ground. “She hasn’t answered my calls or texts. What do I do?”

“You could try stopping at Pierre’s,” he pauses, “but if she wants space, maybe it’s better to wait until she’s ready. You could text her that. Let her know you’re here whenever she’s ready to talk.”

“Sam, I love you. Thanks for being my friend. I know I don’t make it easy.” Sam practically tackles Sebastian.

“C-BASS! You’re so romantic. I love you too.”

Chapter Text

It’s Friday night and Shane walks to meet Derick and Stella at the bar down the street. Once they felt comfortable enough to hire a sitter, they made it a priority to spend Friday evenings together. Sure, Shane feels lonely sometimes in his one-bedroom apartment, but it’s not like he could live with them forever. 

After Jas was born, they asked Shane to stay with them for that first year. They didn’t have any other family in the city and knew they’d need extra help. Shane was reluctant at first, worried he’d accidentally break the small and fragile Jas, but it took very little to convince him. He quickly took to nannying and helping them while Stella recovered. He often cooked, cleaned, and helped with nights so they could sleep. He quickly fell in love with Jas in a way he didn’t think existed. He remembers the sharp pain the day he moved into his own home, even though he knew the arrangement was temporary. 

Shane still visits regularly when he isn't working, usually on the weekends. He likes to come over and cook them brunch on Sundays. Jas helps him break eggs, usually getting more on the counter than in the bowl. Shane longs for the weekends when he sees his friends. Although he will never tell them, he misses living with them. It gave him a sense of family he can’t replace. 

After he moved out, his energy fell slowly at first, barely even noticeable. But after a few months, he struggled to get out of bed. Sometimes, he spends the entire day under a heavy, always present weight pushing him down. Those days suffocate him, the world crushes him, and self-doubt creeps into his head. The intrusive thoughts torture him, coming the worst at night. That’s when he started to drink more. The alcohol dulls the feelings and distracts his thoughts until he passes out.

It didn’t take long for Stella and Derick to worry. Shane had called out for the 5 th time that month and was on the verge of being fired. The two of them stormed into his apartment and gave him the “you better pull yourself together” speech. It was playful, but their words were laced with concern. They dragged him out of his apartment and to the bar for some pool. Thus, Friday nights were born. 

Shane laughed with his friends and felt better about himself than he had in months. Still, he felt like he had rotted inside. Like there was some toxic piece of him that couldn’t be cleaned. Some days were worse, but going out regularly with Stella and Derick kept it at bay. It gave him a few hours of reprieve. Still, he carried it with him everywhere he went as his invisible companion. 

Shane wakes up to a throbbing in his head and dried tears along his temples as he stares at the ceiling. He blankly looks past the fan as it flies across his vision. He wonders what will happen to it. Will it break beyond repair, only to be thrown out with the trash? Never knowing that none of what it has done in life will matter. No one will mourn its loss, it’ll just be forgotten and replaced, never given another thought. Maybe that’s better than the realization of its worthlessness.

He drags himself out of bed and out to the coop. He loves his chickens. They greet him every morning with the sweetest clucks and chirps. He knows he doesn’t deserve this kind of love, but it’s one of few moments of respite he gets in his sad excuse of a life. 

It should have been me.

The intrusive thoughts send a jolt of pain through his body. He rushes to the back of the coop and feels for that familiar bottle behind the hay bales. He finds it buried down deep and begins to drink, letting the familiar burn tear through his throat. He downs the bottle, nearly choking, until it’s empty. Shane forces his eyes shut, clenching his jaw.

After nearly choking from how quickly he drank the bottle, he wipes off his face and knows it’s time to get ready for work. He hates his job, but it helps support Marnie and Jas. Mostly, he wants to give Jas everything. He’s been saving every bit he can and putting it into a savings account for her.

By the time he’s ready and out the door, a nice buzz warms his head. It clouds his brain, keeping his darker thoughts buried in the depths of his mind. He brings a flask to help him through his day. He doesn’t want to risk sobering up at work.

He takes the path in front of Marnie’s into town. As he enters, he sees Sam and Sebastian by the tree in front of Sam’s house. Ugh. People . He doesn’t exactly hate them, but he also doesn’t want to talk to them. Sam is exhausting at work, always wanting to chat and Sebastian makes him angry, but he isn’t sure why. He hasn’t ever even had an actual conversation with him.

As Shane draws nearer, he realizes they are having a heated conversation. He overhears them yelling.

“I just told you I’ve been dreaming about a girl I hadn’t even met and can’t stop thinking about her and it’s just normal?” Sebastian shouts. “That’s not fu—” 

“I’ve been dreaming about her too!” Sam interrupts. 

Shane wonders what they’re talking about but decides to cut around behind the houses. He doesn’t want to risk running into them during whatever that was. 

He makes the long walk to Joja Mart and clocks in for his shift. He ignores Morris and the new cash register worker whose name he never even bothered to learn. Shane spends the next mind numbing 8 hours stocking, sweeping, and mopping in silence.

When his shift is finally over, he clocks out and heads to Gus’s. His buzz is wearing off, as he finished his flask a few hours ago, and he doesn’t have enough at home to get him through the night. 

He walks through the saloon doors and is immediately greeted by Gus with a small nod. Shane heads over to his usual spot near the end of the bar and without saying a word, Gus drops off a beer in front of Shane.

“What’s this for?” He asks. “I haven’t even ordered yet.”

“Enny sent that over.” He replies.

Shane looks to the table in the corner on the other end of the bar and sees the farmer sitting alone with a half empty beer in front of her. He grabs his beer and storms over to her.

“What the fuck is this?” He practically shouts. “Do you think I’m some sort of charity case or something?” He slams the beer down in front of her. “Save it for someone else.”

Before he turns to walk away, he sees the gloss in her despondent eyes and redness of her cheeks. Is she drunk?

“Take it or don’t.” She responds flatly. He can smell the booze wafting off her when she speaks. She’s definitely drunk. “No strings.” 

“Why give it to me?” The anger dissipates slightly.

“I don’t know.” She shrugs and finishes her drink. She pulls out some gold and leaves it on the table. Without another word, she gets up and walks out.

Enny hops down the shaft, bypassing the ladder altogether. She feels the adrenaline course through her from the previous floor’s fight. Exploring the mines and slaying monsters woke something inside of her. Something she didn’t know existed. Something primal and raw, clawing its way to get out.

The mines settled comfortably in her bones, as if she had always been down here. Each floor offers unique creatures and materials. Killing the beasts gives her an immediate satisfaction, while collecting ore and minerals fills her with pride over her accomplishments on the farm.

She drops down to the 20 th floor and sees a lake bouncing light off it in every direction. The whole cavern shimmers, lighting it up. In the middle of the ground, she sees a chest. She found one on the 10 th floor too, and wonders who put them there.

She opens it to find a small, steel sword. It looks brand new, and like it will do much more damage than her training sword, but it seems odd for something like this to be sitting in a chest in an abandoned mine. Not odd enough to keep her from taking it of course.

She checks her phone and sees it’s already past midnight. She won’t have time to try out her new blade. She stores it on her hip, in place of the old one, and gets to work on the elevator. She’s getting the hang of fixing them, and it goes by quickly. She scrambles out of mines and heads home. Tomorrow, she’ll try out her new weapon.

Enny’s head screams, and not just from her dream. Today, she is hungover. After Sebastian left, she cried until Cat forced her to get up with its hungry cries. The brief distraction was enough to break her free from self-despair.

She fed Cat and ran out of her cabin. She didn’t know where to go, but her mindless wandering brought her to the saloon. It was a Monday, so she didn’t expect to run into anyone so early in the afternoon. She went in, found a seat in the corner, and drank. She kept drinking until her world spun and she couldn’t think.

Emily came over frustratingly to cut her off, but before she left, the door opened. She tensed up, worried who was walking in. When she saw that it was Shane, she asked Emily to put his first drink on her tab. She hesitated, but ultimately agreed. 

Not long after, Shane came storming over to yell at her about something. She didn’t really care if he took it or not. She’s not even sure why she bought it. But she ended their conversation and went home, barely making it to her bed before passing out. 

Ugh. Chores are going to suckkkkkkk. She groans getting out of bed and heavily considers staying in. She knows she can’t, she needs to get through the mines, but she also knows she isn’t getting far today in this condition. She gets up and readies herself to go see the damn doctor.

The trek into town tortures her already beaten body. The sun pierces her eyes straight to her head, the usually calming chirps of birds grate her ears, and each step sends aches through her legs. By the time she makes it, the clinic is already open. She walks in to be greeted by a far too chipper Maru. Enny grumbles in response and walks up to the counter.

“Oh, aren’t you the one who just moved in?” Maru asks. “I’m Maru. My mom, Robin, won’t stop talking about you.”

“Yeah, that’s me.” Maru’s voice screeches in her ears. “Can I get a health tonic?”

“Of course!” She disappears to the back and returns a minute later. “Here you go, it’ll be 1000g.”

Enny throws the gold on the counter and chugs the drink right there.

“Are you okay?” Maru clearly looks concerned. “Do you want me to get Harvey?”

“No thanks. I don’t need the good doctor taking my house too.” She truly hates the man and his never-ending bills.

“Um, okay.” Maru looks away nervously. “Can I help you with anything else?”

“No,” she snaps before disappearing out the door. 

A slight pang of guilt tugs at Enny’s stomach. Their relationship is complicated and hard back home, but Enny cares for her too much to be short with her.

Enny heads back to the farm to water her crops. She’ll have to harvest again tomorrow, which means she likely won’t have the time or energy to go deeper in the caves. She needs to hurry up and head there today. 

On the way, her phone goes off.

Leah : I heard you had a little too much fun last night 😉

Enny : I don’t know if fun is the right word. I had to go give the crook Harvey money for a tonic

Leah : Damn, just how much did you drink?

Enny : Don’t ask like your girlfriend didn’t already tell you. Tell her I say hi

Leah : You don’t know that she’s here!

Emily : Hi Enny! I’m glad you’re feeling better 😊

Leah : Okay, maybe you know now. But definitely not before.

Enny loves how sweet they are. They make her feel welcome and forget that she’s an intruder in this world.

Enny : How was the rest of the egg festival

Leah : You would know if you were there…..

Leah : But it was fun. Someone spiked the punch *cough* Pam *cough* and of course Elliot, Emily, and I ‘didn’t’ know

Enny : So you got day drunk? Lol

Leah : Mayyybbbeeee. But definitely not as drunk as you last night

Leah : Want to hang out with Em and Elliot tomorrow? We’re planning to take a walk out to the dock. I’m going to paint, while Elliot looks for inspiration for his book

Enny : Yeah, that sounds great. Let me know when you’re heading down and I’ll meet you there

Leah : Awesome! I can’t wait!

Enny : I’m excited too!

She speeds through her chores, thanks to that tonic. It gave her the energy she needed. She has to admit, the doctor does make a good tonic. She packs her farming equipment away and takes the bare minimum with her up the mountain path. She needs to keep as much extra space in her bag as possible.

She passes Robin’s and the forest, making her way to the entrance. She takes the elevator down and is disappointed to only be on the 10 th floor. She needs to work faster if she wants some answers. 

She exits the elevator and finds the next ladder easily. The floors are mostly the same. A few green slimes, the occasional duggy, and even another rock crab. She finally reaches the 20 th floor and sees a familiar chest in the middle of the cavern. She lets out a breath in relief. She was worried she wouldn’t find anything down here. This chest gives her hope that the key to the desert cave is still buried in its depths. 

The chest itself just contains a new pair of boots that magically fit her feet perfectly. More weird magic, she supposes. She switches her old ones out and already feels more capable. She takes a short snack break in the baren cavern before moving on.

She makes it another 5 floors before becoming too exhausted to continue. She doesn’t want to risk passing out again. It’s still a little early though, only about 5 o’clock. She fixes the elevator on this floor and packs up her bag. 

Enny exits the mines with a bag full of materials, ore, minerals, and geodes. If she hurries, she can get down to the museum to donate a few things. The geodes will have to wait until tomorrow. 

She takes the path along the eastern river and crosses the bridge by Joja Mart. She manages to get to the museum right at 5:55pm.

“Hi, Enny.” Gunther greets her. “How are you today?”

“Hey, Gunther,” she replies, “I’m beat, but not too bad. I’m sorry to come so close to closing time. I found a few things in the mines today and wanted to drop them off.”

Gunther’s eyes light up and he quickly rushes out from behind the counter.

“This is more than worth staying open a bit longer for.” He reassures her.

Enny sets her bag on the floor and begins to pull out a few minerals. 

“I found an earth stone, a topaz, and a quartz.” She pulls out the three gems carefully, and Gunther takes them one at a time. He sets them on a nearby table to inspect them.

“These are in exceptional condition. Are you sure you want to donate them? You could make some money from these due to their sizes.” He reluctantly shares their value.

“I’m sure.” She reassures. “I found a few extra earth crystals that I plan to use on the farm, and I have no doubt I’ll find more gems.”

“You’re very kind, Enny. The museum is honored by your donation.”

“No, not at all,” Enny shakes her head and waves her hands, “they belong here.”

“Regardless, I owe you, my gratitude. I wish I had someway to repay you for your generosity.”

“Seriously Gunther, I don’t need anything.” Enny quickly turns to the door.

“Oh, I almost forgot,” he says just as she’s about to leave, “the internet is working again. Feel free to come in anytime to use it.” He smiles at her.

“I will. Thanks Gunther.” 

With that, she walks out the door and checks her phone and sees it’s 6:20pm. She doesn’t want to go home this early. A ball of anxiety forms in her stomach whenever she knows she’ll be alone with no distractions. It’s been harder to keep the thoughts away after the wizard told her how long she’ll be here.

She decides to head to the saloon for dinner.  Just food. She thinks. She doesn’t need to wake up hungover again. When she walks through the doors, she is once again greeted by Gus.

“Back so soon?” He playfully chides.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” She waves off the comment. “Just food tonight. What’s your special?”

“We have baked fish sourced locally.”

“Willy had a big haul?” 

“You are already getting to know our little community.” He chuckles.

“Something like that.” She looks away. “I’ll take two salads. One for here and one to go.”

“Of course, anything to drink?”

“Water.” 

“I’ll bring it right out to you,” he smiles. 

Enny finds the familiar table tucked away in the corner of the bar. She passes Pam drinking at the end of the counter. She doesn’t seem to notice Enny despite her walking through Pam’s field of vision. Jeez, was I that bad last night?

She thinks back to the night before and vaguely recalls buying Shane a drink. He asked her why she did it and she isn’t entirely sure. Something about him makes her sad. She knew little about him from her own world, but when she looks at him, she sees something familiar, something dying. 

She enjoys getting to know this world’s Leah. The wizard was right about her needing social contact. It helps that they weren’t that close before. Still, she reminds her of her own world. Most of the town does. She hurts because she misses them and is surrounded by fragments of who they were. She misses how close she was with Sam and Abby, but here, she can’t bring herself to face them. 

Her heart beats faster and her breathing becomes shallow. Push away the thoughts. Don’t think about them. Don’t think about the loneliness of this place.  

Enny is pulled from her thoughts by a sudden thud in front of her.

“Here.” Shane grumbles. She looks in front of her at the tall glass full of beer. When she doesn’t grab it his face scowls. “Do whatever you want with it.”

“Why give this to me?” She echoes the words he said to her.

“I don’t know.” He turns and walks away.

She stares at the glass, wondering if she should drink it. As the anxiety creeps back into her chest, she reaches for the glass without hesitation.

“Changed your mind, I see?” Gus says while holding her a plated salad. She sheepishly nods. “No judgments here. Let me know when you want to leave, and I’ll box up another salad. I don’t want it to wilt before you even get home.”

“Thanks, Gus.” She replies weakly. She finishes the drink quickly and starts to work on her salad. She already feels the light buzz that comes from the first drink on an empty stomach. One more won’t hurt.  

She walks up to the bar to order another drink. A deviously evil plan occurs to her when Gus walks over.

“Need another drink?” He asks.

“I need two more drinks please. One for me, and the other for the gentleman at the end of the bar.” She can’t help but grin as she draws out the word gentleman. He gives her a curious look. “Also, please don’t tell him who it’s from.”

“He’s going to know.” 

“I know.” She says leaning in with a smile.

“Now don’t you two start any trouble in my saloon.” He raises his eyebrow and gives the faintest smirk.

She waits while he pours her a glass, then turns around and walks back to her table before Gus gives Shane his. She takes a heavy drink and goes back to eating her salad. As she takes the last bite, she is once again interrupted by a loud thunk on the table. 

“What the fuck is this?” He demands, gesturing at the beer Gus just brought him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Enny can barely contain her excitement.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” He angrily snaps. “Stop. Buying. Me. Drinks.” He leaves the drink on the table and walks back to the end of the bar.

Enny grabs both drinks and walks over to where he’s standing. She takes a seat at the bar directly in front of him. He glares daggers at her while she takes a drink.

“I think you forgot this.” She pushes the beer towards him.

“What’s your problem?” He snaps. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

“I don’t think you really want me to. Otherwise, why buy me a drink?” 

“Maybe I just didn’t want to feel like I owe you anything.” He fumes.

“Maybe, but you don’t strike me as the kind of person to think that.” For a moment, Shane has no response. She must be onto something for him to shut up so quickly. “I think you secretly want to be nice.”

“What makes you think I don’t want to be nice?” He almost seems hurt. “I can be nice. I can be the nicest person in this whole town!”

“I bet you can be.” Enny’s face breaks out into a big smile.

“Yoba, you’re annoying.” He tries to rub the tension from his forehead. “How long am I going to have to put up with your shit?” Enny simply laughs and Shane begrudgingly sits next to her. “I’m buying the next round.”

Pleased, Enny chugs her drink and waits for him to catch up. He raises an eyebrow as she slams the glass back on the bar top.

“Then, you’d better hurry up.” 

“Alright, a girl after my own heart, I see.” He chuckles and follows suit, making quick work of his own drink. He sets the glass down and flags Gus over. “Two more please.”

They continue to drink through the rest of the night. They talk a little, mostly about who can hold their alcohol better. They make jabs and snide remarks, while fighting over who pays for each beer. Enny is proud when Gus drops off their final tabs and sees they bought the same amount tonight.

“You know that means you still owe me one.” She remarks.

“Fuck off farmer.” He retorts. “Don’t you have work to do? Get out of here and leave me alone.”

She laughs and gets up to leave.

“Night Gus,” she calls down the bar. Then she turns to Shane smirking. “Goodnight Shane.”

“Yeah whatever, night asshole.” She gives one last laugh and walks out. 

She pulls out her phone to see it’s nearly midnight. Fuck. Tomorrow is going to suck fucking balls. She makes the long walk to her cabin, only stumbling slightly, and promptly passes out on her bed.

Chapter Text

Leah stares at the wooden sculpture in front of her. Its sharp edges and soft curves represent a duality in nature. The ability to be welcoming and closed off at the same time. The wood contorts into layers of these binaries to create the culmination of what lies before her. The wood holds deep cracks through the center and she can’t help but think of them as scars. Some are visible on the surface, but she knows they run further than anyone can see.

Leah wakes up warmly wrapped up in a set of soft arms. The light is just beginning to shine through her window and it dances across her art studio. It brightens her cabin until it reaches the wooden sculpture in the center of the room. Somehow, it seems to absorb the light from the world, never to be seen again. It is a dark blemish on this earth that she feels compelled to sculpt.

She has spent months working on this piece. The idea came to her in a dream, and at first, she didn’t want to create it. The dreams felt tainted, and she knew that came from the sculpture. But the dreams only grew in intensity, demanding to be born into reality. The itch turned into a gnawing pain, begging to be let out.

She talked to Elliott about it once. He experiences similar feelings when writing. He calls it ‘the call of creativity.’ Ideas and feelings want to be born to live a life of their very own. We are merely conduits for the stream of inspiration.

So, she began this work using only driftwood from the valley. Every piece is uniquely damaged and shaped from the harsh forces of the water. Each one speaks to her and feels like a fragment of something lost.

Leah looks at her sculpture now and knows it isn’t finished, but she can’t rush it. The wood comes to her when it’s ready. Still, she knows the end is close. She feels it in her body like the chill of winter settling in her muscles and bones. Every breath she takes brings in a rush of cold into her body.

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!” Enny jolts awake screaming. It sounded like an airplane just crashed outside of her cabin. Her ears ring from the sound and the ground rumbles in retribution for its disturbance. She falls out of bed scrambling to her feet. She runs to her porch and sees a fire about 50 feet from her cabin. 

“SHIT! FUCK!” She looks around in a panic. Whatever caused the fire left a trail of dug up earth and debris behind it. She runs towards her crops, and they don’t appear to be damaged. The disturbed ground seems to be just past her field. She lets out a short, relieved breath of air before turning to look at the inferno on her land. 

Flames erupt from the source of the damage, and she worries about how far they’ll spread. The grass isn’t dry, but if the fire’s hot enough, it won’t matter. She runs to the small lake by her crop field and fills up a bucket. She races towards the fire and throws water over it, but the fire is too large for the small amount her bucket can carry.

“Think Enny think.” She tears her mind apart trying to think of a solution. “The sprinklers!” She whips her head back towards her crops. She just installed these shitty sprinklers that she didn’t realize covered only a small area. 

She doesn’t know if it’ll be enough, but her legs are already moving before she can doubt herself. She frantically grabs the nearest sprinkler head and water attachment. The above ground, mobile piping is easy to pull across her farm. She throws the sprinkler as close as she can to the fire without burning herself.

Enny runs back and grabs four more sprinklers to surround the fire as much as possible. Once they are all in place, she runs to the water control and turns it all the way up. Water sprays from the sprinklers onto the fire.

“Come on! Come on! Please work.” She begs the fire to subside. After the longest minute of her life, she sees the flames shrink slightly. “Fuck yes!” But she knows it isn’t enough. She runs back to the lake and grabs another bucket of water. She sprints to the fire, douses it, runs back to the lake, gets more water, and repeats the process until her legs scream in pain.

The fire dies more, but Enny can’t stop. She can’t risk it spreading. She pushes through the pain and grabs more water. Her lungs suffocate in the smoke, each breath more pained than the last, and her skin burns from the heat of the fire. Still, she doesn’t stop. 

Enny wakes up coughing so hard she can barely breathe. Fire rips through her skin and fear grips her chest. She falls from the bed, then pulls herself up only to stumble into the wall near the light switch. Light floods the small cabin dispersing the ash covered burns from her nightmare.

“It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream. It’s just a stupid fucking dream.” She repeats until she can breathe normally. She hates that night. A meteor came down on her farm and nearly burnt it to the ground. She remembers running with that bucket for what felt like hours. Eventually the fire died down, but she collapsed from the smoke. She woke up in the clinic and practically fought Harvey to go home.

Her farm was minimally damaged. She managed to save her crops and cabin from the worst of the fire, but she couldn’t remove the meteor. It was too heavy to move and too hard to mine. It sat there for months before Enny could upgrade her pickaxe enough to break it down. 

I wonder if it’ll happen again. At least here, there is more water and sand isn’t very flammable. Still, she hopes it won’t. It was one of the most terrifying nights of her life. It was also the night she realized just how much that farm meant to her. She shudders at the thought of losing it. She vows to get back to it. Nothing will keep me from coming back to you.

Enny fights through the phantom pain gripping her body and gets ready for the day. Robin will be working on the coop, and she has plans with Leah later. She needs to harvest and plant more crops, and if she has time, she wants to build a preserves jar and mayonnaise machine. 

Enny leaves the cabin and starts working on her crops. Harvest goes quickly and she has full batches of parsnips, kale, and potatoes. She finishes a little before 9am and heads over to Pierre’s for more seeds, but when she walks up to the door, it won’t open.

“What the fuck?” She says confused. She looks next to the door and sees he’s closed on Wednesdays. “WHAT THE FUCK, PIERRE!” She screams . Since when has he been closed on Wednesdays? She thinks back to her own world and vaguely recalls he had limited hours that first year. Shit. Now what am I supposed to do?

She thinks for a moment and decides to go home and build her preserves jar and mayonnaise machine, muttering profanities about Pierre the whole way back. She gets home and runs into Robin.

“Oh, hi dear.” She beams. “I didn’t wake you this morning, did I?”

“Not at all,” Enny says as they both walk over to the supply chests. “How’s the coop going?”

“It’s great! I should be finished by the end of the day. She reaches in for some more wood.

“Oh, awesome. That’s sooner than I expected.” Enny reaches for supplies after Robin pulls hers out. “I really appreciate you doing this for me.”

“I really appreciate your business.” She grins. “Bring me as many projects that you have.”

“I can definitely do that.” Might as well support this Enny’s transition into the valley.

Robin walks back towards the coop, while Enny sets up her own construction in front of the cabin. It goes quickly because of her past experiences, so she decides to build another preserves jars and mayonnaise machine with her extra time. Just as she finishes, her phone buzzes in her pocket.

Leah : Hey girl! We’re heading to the pier soon. Should be there in about an hour. You still coming?

Enny : I get the impression you wouldn’t let me miss it

Leah : I mean, you’re not wrong

Enny : That’s what I thought. I’ll save you the trip here. See you soon

Leah : Good choice 😊

Enny pockets her phone and decides to take a quick shower. She’s covered in dirt and grime that she wants to wash off. She spends a little extra time under the hot water to soothe her achy muscles. She gently rubs the soap into her muscles and stands under the warm water, content. Her shower is far too short, but Enny finishes and quickly dries off. She braids her hair and lets them fall over the front of her shoulders. She feeds Cat on the way out, grabs her remaining topaz, and heads south. 

“I’m heading to the pier for a bit.” She calls to Robin as she passes her. “Let me know if you need anything while I’m gone.”

“Will do,” she replies with a smile, “have fun!”

Enny leaves the farm and makes her way through the woods. Each step sends a shock of anxiety through her nerves. She feels comfortable around Leah, but this is her first ‘group thing.’ Once she sees the pier she quickly finds Leah. She is set up at the end with a painting, Emily is sitting with her feet dangling over the edge, and Elliott is staring over the lake by Leah.

“Hey guys,” Enny calls out nervously with a wave.

“It’s about time!” Leah yells back. 

Enny walks down the pier and pulls out the topaz from her bag. She stretches out her arm and hands it to Emily.

“What a beautiful topaz!” Emily’s voice squeaks. “It’s full of spiritual energy. Where did you find this?”

“In the mines,” Enny replies. “There’s a bunch of stuff like that down there.” Emily’s eyes widen in disbelief.

“You mean…this is just sitting down there? For anyone to grab?” The excitement bubbles in her voice.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, Em.” Leah starts. “The mines are dangerous.”

“She’s right.” Enny agrees while Emily noticeably deflates. “But! That’s why I’m here. To brave the local dangers and plunder for treasure.” She puts her hands on her hips and puffs out her chest, mimicking a superhero pose. Leah flings some paint at her.

“You shouldn’t go down there either.” She scolds.

“Maybe, but I’m definitely going to.” Enny replies. “Anyways, this one's for you Emily.”

“You can’t be serious!” She jumps up to her feet. “I can’t possibly accept this.”

“Too bad.” Enny acts disinterested, but really hopes Emily likes it. “It’s yours now.”

“Enny, thank you so much.” She easily concedes. “This gift is fabulous!”

“Anytime,” Enny nods, “I’ll bring you more the next time I go down there.” Emily’s face lights up in excitement. This small connection fills Enny with joy.

“Ugh,” Leah groans. “I hate knowing you go down there.” 

“I promise I’m safe.” Enny flashes her most innocent smile.

“Whatever.” Leah rolls her eyes. “Oh! I almost forgot, this is Elliott.” She motions to the long-haired man behind her as Emily sits back down.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He reaches out a hand to take hers. “I live in the little cabin on the beach.” Enny accepts his hand’s request, and he leans down slightly to kiss the top of it.

She was never very close to Elliott, but he was this formal in her world as well. He always chose his words carefully and seemed oblivious to his own beauty. Many of the townspeople fawned over and talked about him, but he never seemed to notice. He was enthralled by his writing. Enny knows little about him and feels refreshed by another person she doesn’t share much of a past with.

“It’s good to meet you too Elliott. My name’s Enny, but I’m sure you already knew that.”

“Yes, between Leah and Emily, I don’t think I could have forgotten it,” he gives a light chuckle.

“I hear you’re a writer. What are you working on right now?” Leah returns to her painting while Elliott motions to the lake.

“I, am not sure yet.” He looks down at the water. “I hoped for some inspiration here today. Tell me Enny, what kind of novels do you like?”

“I think you’re fishing, Elliott.” Enny flashes a knowing grin. “You know, trying to elicit decisions you should make yourself from others.”

“Enny, you are quite observant.” He lets out a sigh. “You are correct. I need to channel my art.”

“It’ll feel more authentic that way. Then, it’s something you can bring to life and feel proud of.” Enny reasons.

“Ha!” Leah shouts. “No more questioning others about your book.” 

“Yes, yes, you’re right,” he concedes. “No more then.”

Enny sets her pack down and pulls out a fishing rod.

“Do you mind if I fish?” She asks. They all shake their heads and urge her on with smiles. “Great.” She beams.

They spend all afternoon on the pier. Leah paints, while Elliott occasionally scribbles something down in his notebook, mumbling to himself. Emily meditates in silence and Enny quietly fishes. They are all content to sit in each other’s presence, without the need to talk.

As the sun sets, Leah breaks the silence.

“That’s it!” She exclaims. “I’m done.” The three of them walk over and admire her painting. It’s the lake in front of them but it’s out of step. The muted colors don’t line up with the vibrancy of the nearby forest. It is both beautiful and tragic.

“Leah, this is incredible.” Emily gasps. 

“I expected a bit of a happier painting today, but as Elliott says, ‘something something call of creativity.’” Leah dramatically waives her brush in the air for effect. Elliott merely chuckles before adding.

“Yes, you are right. That’s exactly how I sound.” The three of them laugh while Enny stares motionless at the canvas. They turn to her and see tears streaming down her face.

“Hey, Enny, what’s wrong?” Leah moves to her side. Enny can’t speak, she can only look at the painting.

Emily understands and moves to stand between Enny and the easel, blocking her view. Enny finally looks up and realizes she’s crying.

“I’m…so sorry, Leah.” She says, wiping away tears. “I don’t know what happened.”

“Hey, hey, you have nothing to apologize for.” Leah soothes her with her angelic voice. “It happens sometimes with art. It’s actually, like, the biggest compliment an artist can get. It means it connected with you and resonated on an emotional level.”

“Yeah, I guess that makes sense.” She says quietly.

“Do you want to talk about it,” Emily asks cautiously.

“No, I think I’m okay,” Enny looks into herself. What was I feeling? “Thank you though. You’ve all been so sweet to me.”

“Okay, if you’re sure.” Leah hesitates. Emily and Leah share a look of concern. “Can I at least walk you home?”

“No, that’s not necessary at all!” Enny replies. “I think I’m going to stay out here for a bit longer. I need to catch some fish that only come out at night.”

“Okay,” Leah starts, “do you want some company?”

“No thanks,” Enny forces a smile. “I like the quiet.” Leah gives her a skeptical look.

“Okay…well, text me if you change your mind.”

“I will, I promise.”

They all give their goodbyes and the three of them walk back to town, while Enny sits on the pier. She thinks about Leah’s painting. It felt familiar, like a reflection of herself. She is the muted lake out of step with this world. It left an empty feeling in her chest. Will I really be able to go home? Her vision blurs through the tears.

“Good, Yoba,” she hears a moan from behind her. “Can I seriously not go anywhere without running into you and your bullshit.”

“Ughh, what do you want?” She groans through sniffles. “This isn’t a great time.” She keeps her eyes fixed on the hazy water.

She hears footsteps come up behind her and feels the shift in weight of the dock by Shane sitting down next to her. Then there’s a snap and hiss of a can being opened.

“Want one?” He holds it out in front of her. She hesitates before he says, “Don’t worry, I won’t count it against you.” 

She takes it and they sit in silence for a few minutes just drinking. After the last drink, she reaches out, demanding another beer. He hands her a can and they continue to drink in the quiet.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Shane finally asks. 

“Not really.” She replies.

“Good,” he snorts, “I didn’t really want to hear about it.” That gets a small laugh out of Enny. “Wow, I didn’t think monsters were capable of laughing.”

“Shut up,” she laughs harder. 

“Good comeback,” he chuckles.

They both laugh before settling back into a comfortable silence. It doesn’t take long for them to finish the 6-pack Shane brought.

“You should have brought more,” she chuckles.

“Ungrateful!” He screams. “That’s what you are.” A smile forms across his face as he reaches into his jacket and produces a small brown bottle.

“I meant to say,” Enny backtracks, “how great of a friend you are.”

“Who says we’re friends?” He asks while taking a swig from the bottle. “You’re just in my favorite drinking spot.” She reaches out and swipes the bottle from his hands. “Rude.” But he just laughs as she takes a hearty drink. 

Once again, the silence engulfs them. They finish the bottle when Enny finally stands up. She sways on her feet and struggles to see straight down the pier. Has it always spun like this?

“Woah, take it easy.” Shane stands next to her for support. “Try not to drown.”

“Are you sure you’re not going to push me?” She laughs.

“Not until you pay me back for those drinks. You’re in debt 6.”

“What! Absolutely not.” She cries. “You said they didn’t count.”

“I said the first one didn’t count. Be happy I’m only counting the whiskey as one.” He gives her an evil smirk.

“Fucker.” They laugh while Shane walks her back to land. “I fucking hate you.” She drunkenly shouts.

“I fucking hate you too.” He laughs. “Try not to get eaten by bears on your way home.”

“Wait…..” she pauses, “there aren’t really bears are there?”

“Oh yeah, and they like to eat little girls like you.” He winks.

“Well I have a cat to protect me.” She says matter of factly.

“Oh yeah? What’s little kitty’s name? So I know who to put on the obituary with you.”

“Cat!”

“Your cat’s name is Cat?” He nearly doubles over in laughter.

“Hey! It’s not funny!”

“It’s…pretty…funny,” he gets out between fits of laughter.

“Whatever,” she rolls her eyes. “You’ll be sorry when I let Cat loose on your chickens.” Shane stiffens immediately.

“Don’t you dare!” The two burst into laughter as they walk back through the woods.

“Alright chicken asshole,” she starts as they come up to Marnie’s, “I’ll see you later.”

“Remember….bears.” He laughs as they part ways.

“Fucking bears,” she giggles her whole way home. Once inside, she slips under her blanket and scoops up the orange Cat. “I know you could take down a bear and definitely all his chickens.” She quickly drifts off to sleep under the purr of her viscous cat.

Chapter Text

“Good Yoba, this is the cutest creature I have ever seen!” Enny squeals when Marnie walks up with Jas and her newest addition, a tiny little yellow chicken.

“She’s going to grow up to be a great hen.” Marnie explains. Jas has to use both hands to hold the little chick, but it looks so content in her palms. 

“You promise to love her lots, right?” Jas whimpers.

“Of course. I already love her so much.” Enny kneels down to meet Jas’s eyes. “I will take real good care of her.”

“Okay,” Jas sniffles as she reaches out with the chick. Enny carefully scoops the little fluff up and cradles it in her arm, only to watch Jas break down in tears.

“Sweetie, Enny will take real good care of her, okay?” Marnie tries to soothe the weeping child.

“Marnie’s right. I’ll do everything I can to make this little chicken happy.” She tries to console Jas, but the tears don’t stop. Enny thinks for a moment, then looks at Marnie. They share a knowing look before she turns back to Jas. “You know, you can come visit her.”

At that, Jas lights up.

“Really? That’s okay?”

“Of course, as long as you’re with Marnie. She should have as much love as she can get. Don’t you think?”

“Yes!” She practically shouts. “She needs lots of love.”

“I also need your help with something else.” Enny says, “If you don’t mind.”

“Anything!” She exclaims.

“This little chicken needs a name.” Enny gives her a wink. ”Would you be able to help me pick one?”

“YES!” She screams. Without even thinking, she shouts, “Plum! Can we call her Plum?”

“Hmmm, you know, she does look like a plum.” Enny looks at Marnie. “What do you think?”

“Oh yes, she definitely looks like a plum.” Marnie responds.

“Then it’s decided.” Enny gives Jas a firm nod. “Would you like to show little Plum to her new home?”

Enny hands Plum back to Jas and the three of them walk to the new coop. Jas sets up a little hay bed and some water, while Enny stocks the feeder. 

“Okay little Plum,” Jas starts, “you make sure you’re real good here. I’ll come back to check on you and love you and feed you snacks.” Enny and Marnie laugh at Jas’s stern voice. She stands up and turns to Enny. “You make sure you take good care of her too!” Enny stifles a laugh.

“I will treat her like the queen she is.” Jas seems to approve because she gives her a nod and walks out of the coop.

Enny wakes up crying. Jas had only been that happy when Enny first moved to the valley. Shane died shortly after that, and the little girl never recovered. Shane died accidentally at the cliffs, but many suspected it was suicide.

It hurts Enny to see Jas now. She’s happy that she's still that innocent little girl, but she sees Izzy when she looks at her. Jas is just a little older than Izzy was when she left. She wonders if she’ll ever see her again. What if I can’t go back home? She shuts her eyes hard and clenches her jaw. Her daughter is so full of life. What will happen to her if Enny doesn’t return? Will she suffer and shut down like Jas? No. She has Sebastian. He won’t let that happen. What Enny would give to hear her laughter or be the unsuspecting victim to one of her surprise jump attacks. Stop.

She pushes the thoughts away and shoots out of bed. Marnie brought her two chickens a few days ago, but without Jas. It seems she is still wary of Enny.

As usual, Enny gets up, tends to the farm, and feeds the chickens. Tomorrow officially means she’s been here for three weeks. She’s trying not to focus on how long it’s been, but it’s hard. She’s still looking at 6 more weeks before the wizard meets with the others.

Enny hasn’t been back to the mines since she reached the 25th floor. Harvesting and planting has taken too long and too much energy the last few days. With today being no exception, she decides to head to the library to drop off some donations and use the internet. She hopes to learn more about the Enny of this world. 

She grabs the amethyst she found yesterday and a few geodes. She might have time to stop at Clint’s so he can open them up for her. She hesitantly walks through the southern part of town. She follows closely to the river, careful to avoid Sam if he’s outside.

She successfully makes her way to the museum without running into anyone. She checks the time and sees it’s only 3:30pm, meaning she has time to stop at Clint’s. He opens the 4 geodes she brings, exposing some coal and copper.

After she’s done, Enny heads over to the museum. 

“Good afternoon Enny.” Gunther greets her. “How are you today?”

“Hey Gunther, I’m doing okay. I brought you a present.” She says with a twinkle in her eye. He visibly lights up.

“Oh? What have you found this time?” He tries to contain his excitement.

Silently, she pulls out the deep purple amethyst and sets it on the counter. His eyes widen and he is momentarily speechless.

“What do you think?” Enny snaps him out of his daze. “Could the museum use it?”

“Enny this is incredible! The museum could definitely use it. Where do you keep getting these?” He questions.

“I found it in the mines.”

“The mines?” His face looks concerned. “Isn’t that dangerous?”

“It’s not too bad. Not that I recommend going down there. I’m happy to bring you everything I find.”

“Well, Enny, you are full of hidden talents, aren’t you?” 

Enny just chuckles before taking the gem to the display. She finds a place in the middle display, but on the other end from the topaz. 

“Hey Gunther,” she calls, “Can I use the computer back here?”

“Who am I to deny the only contributor to the museum?” He chuckles.

Enny sits down at the very old box computer and turns it on. It takes a minute to power up and even longer to connect to the internet. Ugh, this is going to take forever.

Once she finally gets online, she doesn’t even know what to search for. She never had much of a social media presence, something she was often teased or judged for. Maybe this Enny does. She isn’t hopeful, but begins by just searching for her name. 

Her name is uncommon enough, but nothing comes up for her. She does find something out about her grandpa. He was beloved by many and often made headlines in the local paper for his contribution to the county’s food supply. 

She clicks through the various articles and reads about his accomplishments. He sounds like her grandpa. He won first place in the state farming competition, set records on crop sizes, and made sizable donations to help provide food for impoverished areas. 

Then, Enny came across an article from the yearly pumpkin competition. Not surprisingly, he won, but there was a picture. It was nearly 20 years old, but in it was her grandpa, a pumpkin the size of a boulder, and a little girl sitting on the top of it. . 

Enny remembers that day. She was so happy he won. Every day over the summer, Enny went out and talked to the pumpkin. She would tell it stories from the farm, all her favorite animals, and how big of a pumpkin it would grow up to be. She was very proud of the pumpkin for all its hard work.

Her grandpa donated the pumpkin, naturally, and Enny cried watching them take it away. A few days later, he surprised her with some of the pumpkin seeds. He said they could plant them next year. That way, it could live on and continue to grow on their farm year after year. She wasn’t sure what made her happier, that she would grow another pumpkin, or that he called it ‘their’ farm.

Enny stares at the picture, lost in her own memory. She’s glad it exists here too, as it gives her a small connection to this world. Moving on, she decides to take a new approach. She had a few friends, if you could call them that, who might have put her in their social media posts.

She searches until she finds what she was looking for. This world’s Enny seems similar to who she was. She had a roommate in the city. They partied a lot. Most of the pictures were taken when drunk. She can’t determine where she worked, but it seems she lived in the same apartment. 

Enny’s heart stops when she sees a picture of her and her brother at her apartment. Without thinking, she turns the computer off. That’s enough . She quickly stands up to leave.

“Night Gunther,” she calls, “thanks for letting me use the computer.”

“Anytime.” He responds. “Take it easy.”

She walks out and makes her way to the saloon. She has avoided it for the last few nights. She didn’t want to run into Sebastian again after the last time, and especially not if he was with Abby. What’s wrong with you? You have your own Sebastian back home. She internally scolds herself.

Still, it isn’t easy knowing they’re together. Their relationship had always seemed more familial than romantic. She was a little insecure about it at first, but he dispelled her doubts. Besides, everyone has a past. She wasn’t one to be mad about that. She just wasn’t used to being confronted with it.

Here, they are together. Why does that bother me so much? She wonders what happened here to change their relationship. Will they get together if I never return? Pushing that hurtful thought aside, Enny opens the door and doesn’t even bother to sit at her table. She heads straight to the bar and grabs the stool next to Shane.

“Buh….you think you can just sit by me whenever you want?” He groans.

“Not much you can really do about it.” She flags down Gus, ordering two beers.

“I see what kind of night it’s going to be.” He rolls his eyes and takes a seat next to her. “I was starting to think you were avoiding me because you didn’t want to pay what you owe me.”

“What I owe you!?” She shouts in shock. “No no no. Those were freebies. You said it yourself.”

“The first one way, not the rest.” He grins at her.

“Ugh fine.” Gus drops two beers off in front of them. “Hey Gus, make sure everything goes on my tab tonight.” He just laughs and walks away, while nodding his head. 

“You really are a stubborn jackass.” Enny snorts.

“And yet it won’t keep you away.”

“I’m hurt!” Enny grabs her chest, mocking pain.

“You’ll get over it.”

“So, chicken bastard,” Enny starts, “what do you do when you aren’t yelling at innocent women.” Shane laughs.

“Well, I work at Joja and help out Marnie with the chickens.” He takes another drink.

“Don’t get me wrong, chickens are pretty great, but why do they like you?” She gives a playful smirk. The joke doesn’t land well, and his face becomes visibly hurt.

“Who knows,” he tries to hide the sadness in his eyes by looking at his drink. “They like you though, so you know, their standards can’t be too high.” She gives a weak smile and wonders what happened to him in her world. 

They quickly return to their banter and beers. Enny notices Shane drinks more than usual tonight. She wonders if it was because of her. Maybe she touched on a sore topic. Maybe she would ask him one day. Maybe not. 

“Hey Gus,” she calls, “can I get the bill?”

“Done already?”

“Yeah, I need to not be hungover tomorrow. I’m heading down to the mines.”

“You really go down there?” He asks.

“Yeah, I know, everyone is so surprised.” She makes a mocking tone in the word ‘surprised.’ “Sometimes, it feels a little sexist. No one says anything about Marlon going down there or the whole Adventurer’s Guild.”

“Fuck ‘em.” Shane says casually. “You’re badass and they’re just jealous.”

“Excuse me,” she draws out each syllable, “did you just say something nice to me?”

“I told you. I can be nice.” He says defensively. “But don’t get used to it.”

“I’m not even sure I believe it happened, and I was right here.” She just laughs, while Gus drops off the tab. Enny’s face lights up at the sight.

“What?” Shane asks.

“Nothing,” she gives a devious grin.

He grabs the bill from her hands and gives a loud groan.

“You’re fucking kidding me.”

“Yep. That’s right. Next time, you owe me two.” With that, she drops the gold and heads to the exit. “See you later asshat. Bye Gus, thanks for everything.”

“Fuck off low bar.”

She hears him laugh behind her until the door closes, then she walks back home, happy for the stillness of the night.

Sebastian stands at the edge of the lake, looking over the water as it shimmers under the moonlight. He loves watching it at night. The quiet ripples flow from the water through his skin, calming his world. He imagines being a rock skipping across that delicate surface. 

His solitude is disturbed by the farmer appearing from the trees next to him. She lets out a small scream in surprise.

“You scared the shit out of me!” She yells at him. “What are you doing out here just creeping around like that?”

“Um, what are you doing out here?” He retorts. He can see her face redden even in just the moonlight.

“Okay, fine. We can both be out here randomly in the middle of the night. Doing totally normal things.”

He takes a step towards her and whispers in her ear.

“My sweet flower, I would never do normal things to you.” He watches her as she stands frozen by his words. Finally, he takes a step back. “So, what awful gift have you brought me today?”

Enny snaps her out of her stupor and clears her throat before quickly digs through her bag, pulling out a jar full of something dark.

“What is this?” He raises his eyebrow.

“It’s honey. It came from my farm.” She beams, clearly proud of herself.

“I hate this.” He just stares at it blankly. 

“You’re kidding me? You don’t like honey? What’s wrong with you?” Her voice rises, but he cuts through her words with his laughter. “What’s so fucking funny?”

“You’re cute when you’re flustered.” He keeps laughing.

“I am NOT flustered.” She asserts. “YOU do NOT fluster me.”

“Mhmm,” he smiles, pleased with himself. “I didn’t say I did. Those are your words.” 

She mumbles a few inaudible words, like she doesn’t know how to respond. Enny opens her bag to return the honey but is stopped by Sebastian grabbing it from her. 

“Hey! Give that back!” She shouts, but instead he opens the jar. “You said you didn’t want it.”

“I didn’t say that. I just said that I hated it.” He brings the jar to his lips and breathes it in. The smell of sugar assaults his senses, causing his face to scowl in response.

“Why would you want it if you hate it?” She questions with an intangible frustration.

“Because it flusters you more.” He dips the tip of his thumb into it and slowly licks it off. She stands there stunned and silent, while he drags his tongue across his finger. The sweetness overpowers any other flavor, but he continues until there is none left on his finger.

He dips it in again, but instead of licking it himself, he reaches it out toward Enny. Her eyes are fixed on him. He stops his hand less than an inch from her face and says nothing. She looks down at the honey dripping down his thumb.

Her lips part slightly, so Sebastian brings the honey to her mouth. He rubs it gently on her bottom lip, while the rest of his hand caresses her cheek. She opens her mouth more and he brings his finger in to rub it on her tongue. Her eyes close and with them her lips. They slightly suck on his thumb and the softest moan escapes her lips. 

He feels her tongue slide over his thumb, licking every part of it. He sets the honey down on a nearby tree and takes his other hand to bring to the side of her neck. He lightly grabs it and moves his thumb in gentle circles just under her jaw. She shudders and he feels his cock pulse in response. 

Slowly, he slides his thumb from her mouth. At first, she moves with it, as though she doesn’t want to stop. Her eyes flutter open and beg him to put more than just that finger in her. He could take her right here. He doesn’t think she’d stop him. He finally lets her go, but holds her gaze mere inches from her face, close enough to smell the honey on her lips. She looks up at him in a daze.

“Just wait until you bring me a gift I actually like.” He gives her a wink.

That’s enough to bring her back to reality.

“YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!” She screams. She pushes him back and he lets out a heavy laugh. “I’m done with you.” She yells, while picking up her bag. 

“I don’t think you are.” His voice low again. “I think you like bringing me ‘gifts.’”

She tries to yell something, but the words die in her throat. She settles for an internal scream and turns back toward the path. 

“You should be more careful around someone who carries a sword!” She shouts.

“Don’t be making promises you aren’t willing to keep, little flower.”

Sebastian wakes up with a throbbing in his pants. He can still feel how her neck felt in his hand. How soft her lips and tongue were. He pictures what that mouth would look like screaming his name while he fucked her.

He realizes he isn’t in his bed. Shit . He’s at Abby’s. He rolls over and she’s still asleep next to him. He feels a pang of guilt rush through him over his dream while sleeping next to her. 

She finally agreed to talk to him last night and he never left. Sebastian did what he could to explain everything to Abby. He left out the dreams but did tell her about the panic attack he had. That he thinks he felt obligated to help Enny because of it. There aren’t a lot of people who suffer from them like he does, and he just wanted to do something good. 

Abby seemed to have accepted his explanation, especially because it came with countless apologies. He focused on telling her how much he loves her and never wants to hurt her. He will do anything he can to avoid causing her more pain. 

He listened to her yell and cry, and he promised to never keep anything like that from her again. The fight ended with her crying in his arms. When the tears dried, she sought to reaffirm their relationship. 

Still, he would be lying if he said he wasn’t disappointed to be in Abby’s bed instead of Enny’s. He checks his phone and it’s only 4am. He can’t sneak out, so he has to wait for her to wake up. He tries to fall back to sleep, but lays there thinking about Enny.

Chapter Text

“Hi Enny,” the wild man greets her, “what brings you up here so early today?”

“Hey Linus,” she replies, “I harvested my first batch of potatoes.” She holds out a big spud with the brightest smile.

“That’s a fine looking potato!” He laughs. “Will you be doing anything special with it?”

“Well, I was hoping you would accept this as a gift,” she replies hopeful. 

“This is a fine gift. I would love to accept it.” Enny beams at his comment.

“Okay, good!” She hands him the potato. “You know, you’re my favorite person here.” She says playfully.

“Is that so?” He seems doubtful. “I’m sure I could think of one other person you like more.”

Enny feels her ears burn at the comment.

“What are you talking about? I barely talk to anyone here.” She looks in every direction but Linus’s.

“No, you’re right. It must be the trees you yell at.” He laughs.

“Sebastian?” She shouts. “Absolutely not. That emo freak is an asshole.”

“Whatever you say Enny.” He just laughs harder.

“How’s your morning going?” She asks, trying to change the subject.

“It’s okay. Someone was throwing rocks at my tent last night, so I’ve been trying to patch up a hole they made.”

“Someone seriously threw rocks at your tent?” She’s mortified. “You’re fucking kidding me.”

“No, sadly, it happens sometimes.”

“Wait…it’s happened before?” Frustration builds inside her.

“People are just afraid of what they don’t understand.” He says flatly.

“You could have gotten hurt!” Enny raises her voice.

“But I didn’t.”

“Don’t try to make it sound like it’s okay,” she scolds, trying to find a balance between the anger Linus should be feeling while tempering her own.

“I know it’s not, but I don’t know what else I would do.” A rustling behind them steals their attention.

“You both are very loud.” A gruff voice comes from a dark-haired man.

“Holy shit, Sebastian?” Enny does a double take. “I didn’t think you existed this early. Are you dying?” 

“What would you do if I was.” He raises an eyebrow and smirks. Enny’s ears warm again.

“I guess I wouldn’t have to push you down this mountain.” She responds shortly. “Seriously though, this is majorly fucked up. Someone was throwing rocks at Linus’s tent last night. They even put a hole in it.”

Sebastian’s face falls into one of concern as he looks at Linus.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, like I told Enny, I’m fine. It’s okay really.”

“Linus, this is serious. Even if you live out here, you’re still part of the valley. Hell, even if you didn’t live here, it doesn’t matter. That’s not okay.” His voice rises with emotions similar to Enny’s. 

“Thank you!” Enny chimes in. “You know it’s serious when we both agree on something.”

Linus sighs heavily.

“It warms my heart to feel included in this community. I don’t always feel that way out here. Still, I don’t know what to do.”

“What if we went to the mayor?” Enny suggests. “We could tell him what’s going on.”

“Yeah, he might actually do something about it.” Sebastian adds. “Or at least make people aware of the situation.”

“I can’t possibly ask you to do that.” Linus’s voice is soft.

“Linus, we care about you.” Enny’s tone matches his. “Would you just be okay if someone were throwing rocks at my house?”

“I suppose you’re right,” he sighs.

“Good. Then it’s settled.” Enny looks to Sebastian and they both nod in agreement. 

Enny groans as she lifts herself out of bed. I guess these dreams are just part of life now. She hates them. They’re constant reminders of what she’s lost. She just wants one night of dreamless sleep. 

She truly hates this farm. The land is terrible to work, the salty breeze cuts her crops, and the sand gets everywhere . She hopes to commission Robin to build a barn in the next couple of days. She has all the materials but needs a little more gold. She should have enough if she mines today and tomorrow, one more day after that at the most.

She hurries through her chores and gets ready to mine. Enny minimally packs her bag so she can bring back more material. She grabs her shiny new sword she found on floor 20. It’s just like what she found in her world and much better than the training blade. 

As she treks up the mountain, her phone vibrates in her pocket. She pulls it out to find a text from Leah. 

Leah : Hey girl. Want to get some lunch today?

Enny : Can’t. Going to the caves today. Don’t freak out

Leah : Ugh, okay. Em says there’s bad juju today, so be extra careful

Enny : I will be the most careful person who ever cared to be careful

Leah : Shut up lol

Leah : Seriously though. I kind of like you. Don’t die

Enny : I will do my best

Leah : This isn’t negotiable

Enny : Lol okay okay. I won’t die

Enny : Happy ?

Leah : Thrilled

Enny walks up further north by Linus’s tent. She sets a potato down on the log and continues to the mines. She sees Marlon by the entrance as she crosses the bridge.

“Afternoon Marlon.” She calls. “How’s your day going?”

“Good afternoon, Enny.” He responds. “My bones are a little stiff, but otherwise I’m okay. Are you heading down today?”

“Yes, I am. I made it to the 25 th floor last week. I’m hoping to get to the dark levels today.” 

“Are you talking about the 30th floor? How do you know they’re dark?” He looks suspicious.

“Oh, I just meant, that, umm, the floors seem to be getting darker the deeper I go.” She stammers. “I’m assuming they’ll be pitch black real soon,” Enny holds her breath, hoping he doesn’t push her thinly veiled explanation.

He gives her a curious look but seems to accept her rationalization. 

“Well, do be careful. They do get completely black as if sucking any light out of the caves. It only lasts about 10 levels, but it starts on the 30 th floor.”

“That’s good to know.” Enny starts to walk in. “Thanks Marlon.”

“Enny,” he hesitates, “be safe down there.”

“Of course. I’m already under strict orders not to die.” She gives a weak laugh, but his face remains concerned.

“Good orders. Stop by when you’re done. There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

“Will do,” Enny feels a light tug in her stomach at his words, a sense of anxiety. But she quickly pushes the thought aside and resumes her walk to the cave.

She crosses the dark threshold into the mines and over to the elevator. She knows these caves better than most. It seems odd for everyone to worry about her so much. She realizes they don’t see her as an experienced adventurer, but today feels excessive. 

Enny feels little anxiety about the mines, but can’t say the same about the skull cave in the desert. Whenever she thinks about going back there, fear builds up in her chest, choking her. She knows she’ll have to return, but she’s afraid of meeting the thing that killed her. She hears it in the dark crevices of her mind. It’s always lurking, becoming louder when she’s alone. It haunts her.

She shakes off those thoughts and returns to the task of clearing these next 5 floors. The 25 th floor isn’t much different than the 24 before it. She starts with the slimes at the other side of the cavern, feeling indifferent to the small, almost comical, globs of goo. Just as she kills the third one, a bug the size of her head flies down on her. It hits her in the back of her shoulder and knocks her off balance, sending a small wave of excitement through her body.

“Fucker,” she breathes, while a sinister smile spreads across her face. “You’ll regret that.”

She waits for its subtle buzz indicating it’s close. Behind me. At the last moment, she spins on her foot and slashes upward into the flying beast. She looks around, as they often travel in groups, but doesn’t see or hear anything. After a few more disappointing moments, she slowly explores the rest of the floor. 

As Enny walks across a soft dirt spot, the ground shifts below her feet until the familiar oversized worm pops up under her. The small duggy does little more than snap at her ankles before Enny slices through its weak body. With no other creatures on this floor, she pulls out her pickaxe and begins mining. She hopes to find some good geodes and gems to sell. 

Enny spends a long-time mining with little success. Ugh. My luck is terrible today . She decides to take an early break and eat a salad. She needs to find some good treasure. She wants that barn so she can expand from farming and chickens. Cows turn into goats, which turn into sheep and pigs. She practically drools over thinking about the price of truffles. She needs to upgrade the coop too. Expand to ducks and little bunnies, or bun buns, as Jas calls them.

She takes the last bite of her salad and collects her pack. She hops down to the next floor and is immediately bombarded by four flying insects. They get a few good hits in, one even biting a small chunk out of her arm sending a flash of pain up her shoulder.

Once the surprise wears off, Enny attacks back. The first one comes at her face, but she manages to knock it back into the wall with the handle of her sword. Immediately, two more come from opposite sides. She runs forward, causing them both to turn and approach her from the same direction. As they close the distance, Enny spins around and slices her sword through the air, hitting both with the same side strike. They fly backwards, one dying while the other circles around to resume its assault. 

She tracks it through the cave, but is met with another sharp bite in her arm. She turns slightly to see the first one latched onto her left arm. Adrenaline rushes through her, propelling her body arm-first into the wall. She crushes the cave fly with ease and returns her focus to the other one, closing the distance, a mere few feet away. Enny jabs her sword forward, meeting the bug head on. The blade sinks smoothly into its head before she whips it off her sword with a flick of her wrists. 

That’s three. Where are you asshole? Enny looks around for the fourth one. She sees nothing but hears the faint buzz of it from her left. There you are. She spins to her side, swinging the sword with both hands. The force slices it in half sending a wave of satisfaction through her body.

She loves this. She became quite the fighter over the years. She trained with Marlon and frequently revisited the mines for practice and materials. These upper-level floors were virtually no threat to her. She doesn’t expect a real challenge until after the ice caves. Those magma floors can be difficult without proper preparation. 

After killing the bugs, she checks for more beasts. She only finds a rock crab tucked away in the back, hiding under its small boulder. It attempts to flee, but Enny corners it. With a swift motion, she sweeps her sword up and with it the rock, exposing its needle-like legs. She adjusts her blade to drive it through its soft belly and listens to its dying screams, feeling that sense of satisfaction flow through her once again.

She continues through the next few floors, the same as before. There are a few more creatures, but very few gems and ore. When she jumps down to the 29 th floor, a thick and heavy air nearly suffocates her. This is wrong. She looks across the cavern’s low, otherworldly glow. Partially eaten bodies of dead beasts litter the ground. She chokes on the rancid stench drenching the air. Bats chitter throughout the cave echoing all around her. This floor is infested. Her heart pounds against her chest rapidly filling with fear. Her mind fills with images of her final moments in her world. The fear that choked her as that beast ripped apart her chest. The panic she felt when it tore off her leg. The pain she felt as she slipped into death thinking of her family.

Her eyes frantically search the cave for a way down, but instead find two massive slimes. Their gelatinous forms defy physics, somehow maintaining a spherical shape despite looming over her. Their entire bodies vibrate and shake, smoothly rolling them across the ground. They lack any features, becoming almost transparent. It distorts the cave behind them and leaves a thick trail of ooze sizzling in the dirt. Acid slimes. Their bodies are made of a corrosive liquid that tears through skin. Her arms tingle at the phantom pain from years of acid exposure. 

Enny can’t move. She’s frozen in place and stares helplessly as the two giant beasts move towards her. They see me. She tells her body to grab her weapon, but it won’t respond. She wills her feet to run, but they ignore her pleas. Run Enny. RUN! Her mind screams.

But she doesn’t. She just stands there as she feels teeth sink into her ankle. She looks down and sees the head of a duggy attached to her leg. She tries to kick it away, but falls to the ground, hitting her head. Her vision distorts and she looks up to see a putrid green blob as it spews acid onto her face. Fire erupts through her eye and across her face causing Enny to scream out in agony.

She tries to stand, to crawl away, to do anything. But she remains frozen on the cold, unforgiving stone ground until she feels pressure in her abdomen. Heat flees from her face, leaving ice cold blood in its wake. Warmth erupts in her stomach and quickly grows. Enny forces her vision to her stomach, feeling the internal fire in her right eye as though it is being seared from her face. She looks out of her only working eye to see two slender claws, belonging to a rock crab, buried deep in her stomach. 

Still, she can’t move. She lays there, watching as it pulls its claws out and stabs her again and again. I’m so cold. Finally, blood loss comes for her consciousness, until she slips away focusing on the faces of Sebastian and Izzy. I’m so sorry.

Linus sprints toward the mines. He has heard guttural screams like this before. They are the screams of the dying. He is soon joined by Robin coming up the path and he sees Marlon running toward the cave from the other direction. Wordlessly, the three of them run into the elevator and head to the lowest floor they can. They quickly find the exposed ladders and descend until they drop down to a dimly glowing floor. Directly in front of them lies a motionless body. 

Marlon is the first to act. He pulls out his sword and slices through the duggy attached to Enny’s leg. Its head stays latched on while the body falls limp to the ground. Next, he cuts the legs off the crab piercing her stomach. It scurries backward and out of sight. Two giant slimes roll closer towards them.

“I’ll distract them! Grab her and go!” He jumps over Enny, through the two globs. He gives them each a weak slash and they turn their attention towards him. As they roll away from Enny, he steps back further. “Hurry!” He yells.

Robin and Linus grab Enny and drag her to the ladder. Linus throws her over his shoulder while Robin climbs up first. She reaches down and pulls Enny up. They continue up the next three floors until they finally reach the elevator. Robin sets Enny down, while Linus starts the old elevator.

“Enny!” Robin cries. “Enny, you have to wake up!” 

Linus leans down and hovers his cheek above her mouth while looking down at her chest. He feels the slightest breath on his face and her chest weakly moves.

“She’s breathing, but just barely. We have to get her to Harvey.” The elevator goes painstakingly slow. Blood gushes from her stomach. “We need to put pressure on her wound.”

Robin pulls off her jacket and balls it up. She presses it into her stomach and Enny screams in anguish, while Linus holds her down. Tears stream down Robin’s face while Linus squeezes his eyes shut. The pained scream passes, and Enny’s body goes limp once again.

“I told Maru to bring the truck up to meet us at the bridge.” Robin manages. 

“Good. Now if this elevator would just go faster!” Linus tries to contain his frustration.

“….Se,” they hear a slight whisper come from Enny.

“Shhh, don’t try to speak.” Linus whispers near her ear.

“Sebastian,” she breathes out, oblivious to Linus’s words. 

“Did she say Sebastian?” Robin looks at Linus confused. 

“I…promised…to come home.” Tears stream down the sides of Enny’s face.

Finally, the doors open and Maru rushes in.

“Oh, my Yoba,” she steps back at the sight. Maru quickly regains her composure and leans down to look at Enny’s condition. She pulls up the jacket and a wave of blood gushes out. She puts it back in place. “We can’t move her like this. We have to stop the bleeding first.”

“How?” Robin cries.

Maru reaches into her bag and pulls out a tourniquet kit. She opens it and grabs a pack of gauze.

“This is to stop bleeding. I’ll have to stuff it in the wound. On three, pull the jacket off and hold her down.” Robin and Linus nod. “One, two, three!” Robin removes the jacket while Maru quickly packs the wound with gauze. Enny cries out again and thrashes under Linus’s hold.

“Hurry!” He yells.

After what feels like an eternity, Maru finally uses the last of the gauze.

“There, it’s done. We need to hurry. Dad’s in the truck. Pick her up and put her in the bed. I’ll stay in the back with her.”

Linus and Robin carefully pick up Enny and carry her out of the mines. Enny’s cold skin sends shivers of fear through Linus. Once outside, they see Demetrius waiting in the truck on the other side of the bridge.They slowly load her onto the truck bed, trying not to move her stomach any more than necessary.

“Sebastian,” Enny whispers, barely audible, as they set her down.

“Enny, try not to talk.” Maru tells her, but Enny seems unaware of their presence.

“Sebastian…Izzy….I love you,” with those words, Enny’s body stills.

“She stopped breathing,” Maru’s voice breaks slightly, but her words rip through Linus’s ears. “We have to hurry.”

Maru and Robin jump in the back of the truck with her, but Linus stays, knowing he would only be in the way..

“I’m going back for Marlon.” he says, hoping they don’t see how he trembles with fear. They both look at him and back at each other. They give a slight nod before turning to him.

“Okay,” Robin jumps out. “We’ll go together. Maru, take care of her.”

“Take care of yourself,” tears well in Maru’s eyes.

Robin runs to the front of the truck and tells Demetrius to go. She turns back and runs with Linus back to the mines. They quickly make their way back down to the 28 th floor. Just as they’re about to climb down the last ladder, a hand comes over the top of the hole.

“Marlon!” Linus calls. Him and Robin hold their hands out and pull the man up. He has some mild burns, but his cloak seems to have protected him from most of it.

“Are you hurt?” Robin cries.

“Not terribly.” He responds, winded. “Where’s Enny?”

“She’s on her way to Harvey’s with Maru and Demetrius. She lost a lot of blood.” Robin explains through heavy breathing. Marlon slowly pulls himself to his feet.

“Good,” he lets out a deep breath.

“We’re taking you there too,” Linus asserts.

“Yeah, I figured. Let’s go.”

Chapter Text

Maru looks through her telescope to carefully locate the Pleiades cluster. She spots the faint glow and centers the scope on it. She slowly manipulates the knob to zoom in, keeping it center, then uses the other one to put it back into focus. 

“Hey,” someone calls from behind. Maru jumps and knocks her telescope over. “Oh, shit Maru I’m so sorry.” She rushes to help pick it up.

“[inaudible name], you scared me!” Maru replies with a gasp.

“I’m sorry. Are you okay? Is your telescope okay?” They pick it up together and set it back down correctly. Maru looks through it.

“It looks like it.”

“I’m so sorry, Maru.”

“It’s okay, accidents happen.” Maru reassures the figureless person. “Do you want to take a look?”

Maru jolts awake.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Harvey pulls his hand from her shoulder. “You’re exhausted. You should go home.”

Maru rubs her eyes and remembers where she is. They brought Enny here last night and Maru assisted Harvey with the surgery. She was so exhausted she must have passed out on the waiting room bench.

“What time is it?” She sleepily asks.

“Just after 8am.” 

“I’m okay, I can help.” She starts to stand up. “What do you need me to do?”

“I need you to go home, Maru. Get some sleep. I’ve got everything covered here. Enny is in recovery and resting. She’ll probably be out for a day or two.”

“But I can help,” she pleads.

“There’s nothing you need to help with right now.” She stares at him trying to think of some rebuttal. “I called your dad. He’s on his way to pick you up.”

“I can walk,” she objects flatly.

“I know you can , but it’s better for you to get a ride.”

“Fine,” she sighs, feeling her breath shake. “I’ll be back later to check on you. I know how you overwork yourself here.”

A flash of guilt crosses his face, and his cheeks redden. He nods and motions her to the door. Outside, Demetrius pulls up in the truck. Maru climbs up and they drive back home.

She feels the weakness in her arms and legs. She stood all night next to Harvey, grabbing his tools, packing more gauze, and keeping Enny sedated. She wasn’t trained for any of it, and she worried she would inadvertently kill Enny, but he coached her through every part. The calm and confidence in his voice gave her the strength to see it through. But as soon as she was done, she left the room and immediately threw up.

The truck comes to a stop, and she realizes her dad has been talking.

“Maru? Are you okay?” He asks, snapping her out of her thoughts.

“Yeah dad, I’m okay,” she says absently. His frustrated sigh says he doesn’t believe her.

“Okay, well go get some sleep and come to the lab when you wake up. We’ll be a bit behind, but we should be able to get caught up tonight.” 

“Right,” she says shortly. She foolishly thought she wouldn’t work in the lab today after everything that happened.

They get out of the truck and walk into the shop. Robin is sitting on the couch near the counter, motionless and staring at nothing. She turns her head to look at Maru.

“How is she?” She asks with red, puffy eyes.

“She’s out of surgery,” Maru looks away. “Now we wait.” Robin stands up and reaches out for her daughter. She pulls her into a tight hug and Maru starts to cry. “Mom, there was so much blood. I don’t understand how she can have any left,” Maru sobs.

“I know sweetie,” Robin rubs circles into her back. “You did so well. That girl is alive because of you.”

“She’s alive because of you!” She retorts. “You pulled her out of those mines..”

Before Robin can respond, the door swings open and Sebastian enters carrying his motorcycle gear. He looks confused at the sight in front of him, but quickly fixates on the blood on Maru’s clothes.

“What happened?” He breathes out weakly.

For a moment, no one speaks.

“Enny stupidly went into the mines and nearly got your mother killed,” Demetrius robotically responds. Sebastian looks at his mother.

“Wh-what is he talking about?”

“It’s not like that, Sebby,” she tries to explain.

“Don’t defend the girl,” Demetrius interrupts. “Those mines are closed off for a reason. You should have left her down there instead of risking yourself like that.” 

“She needed help!” Robin screams. “I couldn’t just leave her down there.”

“Mom,” Sebastian sounds like he’s holding back a cry. “Where’s Enny? Tell me she’s okay.”

“She’s at Harvey’s,” Maru says sheepishly. “She’s okay for now.” Maru looks at her brother and doesn’t recognize his face. It’s stiff and pale. She’s not even sure he heard her. “Sebastian, are you okay?”

“She doesn’t deserve sympathy for being an idiot,” Demetrius interrupts. “She is responsible for her own safety.”

“Demetrius,” Robin’s voice is cold. “That’s enough.” He opens his mouth to speak but closes it in defeat. “Sebby, why don’t you sit down. You don’t look well.” She reaches for his hand, but he pulls away. “Sebby? What’s wrong?”

“Huh,” Demetrius looks at Robin, “This is about what she said. Isn’t it?”

“Mom, what’s he talking about?” Sebastian asks shakily. 

“It’s nothing, really.”

“Don’t lie to him like that,” Demetrius does not hesitate to say. “While she was in and out of consciousness, she talked about you. She said she loved you.” He looks to his mom for confirmation and her face gives it to him. “And why would she do that, Sebastian? Just how close have you become to the farmer?”

Maru feels sick. He always did what he could to get under Sebastian’s skin, to hurt him. She knows her dad hates him, but this is too far. 

“How can you talk to him like that?” Maru yells shakily. “And how can you talk about her so callously? She almost died and you’re here just trying to hurt my brother.” 

Demetrius’s eyes flash with surprise by her sudden outburst, then anger, but before he speaks, another voice cuts through the room.

“Did that really happen?” They all turn to see Abby standing in the still open doorway. She’s looking at Sebastian, eyes full of hurt. “Why would she say that?” Tears silently stream down her face.

“Abby,” Sebastian says as he takes a step towards her.

“Did she really say that?” She’s yelling now. No one gives her the answer she requests, so she turns around and disappears through the doorway. No one says anything. No one chases after her. Maru walks past her dad and into her room. She locks the door and screams into her pillow, until the sound is overtaken by sobs and she finally falls asleep.

Sebastian wakes up to a bright light pouring over the city in front of him. He fell asleep at the lookout point the night before. He slowly opens his eyes more and tries to move his head. A sharp pain stings his neck from the kink he likely received from sleeping against a tree again. 

He shifts his weight and feels a dull pain from his ass that had fallen asleep. Pins prick at it as he tries to sit up in a more comfortable position. His hips ache from the seated position and protest his movements. 

He remains seated for a few more minutes, taking in the sight before him. As much as he hates the early morning, the dawn washes over the city, casting a warm light down below. It contrasts with the eerie beauty of the city lights at night that fills him with a strange sad feeling.

Sebastian comes here to escape his life when he feels overwhelmed. It makes him feel small, almost insignificant in this world. Somehow, that makes his problems seem more bearable. Demetrius has been more combative lately. And although he worked things out with Abby, something still feels wrong between them.

At least last night, he didn’t dream. Not about her, not about the all consuming fear, just nothing. 

His phone buzzes in his pocket. He pulls it out and sees 8 missed calls from his mom. He tries to call her back, but his signal is shotty on this mountain. He thinks she’s just worried that he didn’t come home last night. It’s only 7am, it seems odd she’d check on him so early. He figures it’s time to get up and go home before she sends someone out to look for him. Not that they’d ever find him.

He stands up and stretches out his sore joints. He takes one last longing look over Zuzu City before getting on his bike. He wonders if he’ll ever be like the city. The question is, which version of it? The warm one bathed in light, full of life? Or the black hole sucking in all happiness around it? Deep down, he already knows.

Sebastian starts his bike and makes the long drive back home. The drive is refreshing and quiet in the cool morning air. He lets himself get lost in the wind and the curves of the mountain pass. He wishes he could ride these roads and never go home. Never face Abby. Never think of her .

The ride feels too short by the time he pulls up. Weird. The truck’s out. His mom rarely used it but would occasionally grab it for larger deliveries. He parks his bike in the garage and notices dark, deep red streaks dried on the bed of the truck. His stomach knots and he rushes inside. 

He hears his mom speak, but he feels like he’s under water, drowning. She sounds far away and muffled. Demetrius yells and Maru…defends him? That can’t be right. Then a sad voice cuts through his soul. Abby . 

He doesn’t know what to do. Enny is in the hospital. Abby ran away. He feels like he’s suffocating. The world spins around him. He rushes to the doorway and lets the fresh mountain air wash over him. He smells the pine from the trees and smoke from Linus’s fire. He holds the door frame, tracing over every knot in the wood. 

“Sebby,” his mom’s voice is weak. “Sebby, are you okay?” She lightly puts her hand on his back slowly, as not to alarm him.

“Y-yeah,” he chokes out. “I’m, okay.”

“I was worried about you,” she starts. “I couldn’t find you last night and I was so scared.” Her voice starts to break. He looks over to his mom and sees tears streaming down her face. “The way she talked about you…I thought you might have been down there with her. She wasn’t awake to ask, and Marlon was too injured to go back down there. I started to panic and—”

Sebastian pulls her into a tight hug, cutting her off.

“I’m so sorry mom.” She cries in his arms for a few minutes.

“Baby, where were you?” She finally asks between sniffles.

“I was out riding and just fell asleep.”

“Out in the middle of nowhere?” She pulls back and scolds. “You can’t just be out like that. You have a family who worries about you.”

“I know.” He looks down, ashamed.

“Please, Sebby, please don’t do that. Please just tell me where you are.” He wants to reassure her, to give her what she needs to hear, but she knows when he lies. 

“You can’t even tell your mom where you are?” A nasty voice cuts through the air coming from inside the home. “Are you really that selfish?”

Sebastian grinds his teeth but avoids looking at Demetrius.

“What is your fucking problem?” Sebastian spits.

“My problem is, your girlfriend nearly got your mother killed, you scared your mom, and you’ve done something to Maru to make her act out.”

“Demetrius,” Robin interjects. “Please stop. We’ve all been through enough tonight.”

“No Robin, he needs to hear this. He’s been freeloading off this family for years and does nothing but spread his toxicity in my home.”

“YOUR HOME?” Sebastian screams. “This house was my home before you ever met my mother.”

“Sebastian, don’t,” Robin tries to calm him down. Sebastian looks at her with a stunned silence. “This isn’t a ‘mine’ or ‘yours’ situation. This is our home.”

“Tell him that!” He gestures to Demetrius. “Or do you actually agree with him?”

“Of course not!” She defends. She rubs her forward and sighs. “Look. We’re all exhausted. Let’s just get some sleep and we can talk about this later.” She reaches out for Sebastian’s arm, but he pulls away at her contact.

“I just can’t right now,” he exasperates. “I’m going into town. I’ll be back later.” 

Before she can respond, he runs down the path, out of sight. He doesn’t know where to go, what to do. Should he go find Abby? Or should he check on Enny? His feet make the decision for him when he finds himself in front of Harvey’s.

He pushes the door open to an empty lobby. He tries to open the door leading to the patient rooms, but finds it’s locked. He pounds loudly, shouting for Harvey. Several minutes pass before Harvey finally emerges.

“Sebastian?” He says sleepily, rubbing his eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to see Enny. Is she okay?” Panic fills his voice.

“Enny?” He questions what he just heard. “She’s asleep. You can’t see her right now.”

“Please, Harvey.” He says with worry etched into his face. “Tell me she’s okay.”

Harvey sighs and opens the door. He enters the lobby to talk to Sebastian face to face. 

“Look, you know I can’t really talk about her condition with you. You obviously already know she’s here, most of the town does at this point.” He looks tired and hesitates before he speaks. “She’s okay right now. She’s just going to be out for a while and I’m not allowing her to take visitors at the moment.” He sees Sebastian’s face drop. “I’ll let you know when she is.”

“Okay,” Sebastian sighs heavily. “Thanks Harvey.”

“Get some sleep Sebastian.”

“Right.” 

He turns and walks out of the clinic. Sebastian looks up at the fully lit up sky and wonders how the sun can cheerfully look down while she lies in that hospital bed. He rubs his face and blinks away the tears pricking at his eyes.

He looks around to take in the town. It seems unusually quiet. No one is out in the town square, there isn’t anyone walking around, and even the birds seem to refuse to sing. If what Harvey said is true, then the whole town probably knows what happened. Everyone except you . Why does that thought hurt him so much?

He shakes the thoughts out of his head and turns towards Pierre’s. He needs to talk to Abby. Maybe he can salvage their relationship. Explain to her that he has no idea what his mom was talking about. She can’t really love me, can she? He wishes he could talk to Enny and ask her. It has to be a mistake. Right?

Part of him hopes it isn’t.

He walks into Pierre’s to be greeted by the man himself. 

“Good morning, Sebastian.” He gives a fake smile. “Are you here to shop or to see Abby?”

“I’m looking for Abby.” Pierre drops the smile.

“Right. I haven’t seen her since she left earlier.”

“Okay, thanks.” 

Sebastian walks out as quickly as he can. He pulls out his phone and dials Abby’s number. Straight to voicemail. Fuck . Things just got better, and he’s already managed to screw it up again. He needs to talk to her, to explain. What do I even say ? He’ll figure it out. Right now, he needs to find Abby.

He has an idea of where she is. She only likes to visit the graveyard at night, and since Enny moved in, she hasn’t been to the fields. That means, she’s likely in Cindersnap Forest, west of town. She likes to hang around the weird tower out there.

He goes straight there, practically running. He passes Sam’s, then Marnie’s, and finds himself in the thick trees. He wanders around, trying to find anywhere she might be, or any trace of her. After almost half an hour, he finally sees the tower come into view. This thing is so fucking hard to find. It’s almost as if it’s intentionally difficult.  

He scans the area and sees her sitting on a rock near the river. He walks up slowly, but noisily so he doesn’t scare her. 

“Abby,” he quietly calls.

“Go away.” She doesn’t even turn to look at him.

“Abby, please,” he begs.

“Please what?” She turns with red, puffy eyes from crying. “Please be okay with you lying to me again?”

“I’m not lying to you.”

“Then why did she say she loved you?” She screams.

“I have no fucking idea!” He shouts. Then his voice softens to almost a whisper. “I have no idea.”

“And I’m just supposed to believe that?” The anger drips from her voice. “You’ve been weird since she showed up. You feel more closed off with everyone but her. You took her home for fuck’s sake. Then you tell me there’s nothing going on. I’m trying to believe you, but it’s hard when this keeps happening.”

“I don’t know why she said that. I went to go ask her, but she’s still unconscious.” Shit .

“You went to see her?” Abby’s anger turns to hurt. “You went to see her before coming here? I wasn’t even more important to you. You put her over me,” she starts to laugh. 

“Abby, no it--”

“I’m a fucking joke,” she laughs harder. Sebastian rushes to her and reaches for her arm, but she pulls it away immediately. “Don’t you dare fucking touch me.”

“Abby, come on. Please just hear me out.”

“No. We’re fucking done.” 

Abby gets off the rock and disappears into the trees. Sebastian stands frozen, unsure what to do. She’s made it clear, she doesn’t want to talk to him, maybe never will. He can’t say anything to fix the situation because he can’t talk to Enny. 

Sebastian falls to his feet and pulls his knees to his chest. He tries to focus on the rustling of the wind blowing through the branches and the sound of the forest around him. He thinks of the wind rushing past him on his bike and the refreshing air he breathes. Panic still fills his chest. The world spins and his vision spots.

“Oh shit, are you okay?” A gruff voice pulls him back. 

He looks up and sees Shane standing a few feet in front of him holding a mostly empty bottle of whiskey.

“Shane?”

“You look like shit.” He sways slightly. Is he drunk?

“Like you’re one to talk.” Sebastian rolls his eyes.

“Ouch, what a hurtful comment,” he says sarcastically while taking a drink. “You want some?” 

He stretches out his hand with the bottle. Sebastian looks at it hesitantly for a moment before finally taking it. He brings it to his nose and stifles a gag.

“This smells awful.” 

“Then give it back.” He reaches out for it, but Sebastian pulls it back to take a drink. 

“Good Yoba, that’s worse than it smells.” Sebastian beats his chest while coughing.

“Yeah,” Shane laughs. “The cheap stuff usually is.” 

He steps toward Sebastian and takes a seat a few feet away. They both stare out over the river while taking drinks.

“So, you heard all that right?” Sebastian breaks the silence.

“Do you want me to say no?”

“Yeah, I figured.” Sebastian looks down at the bottle. “What are you even doing out here?”

“I’m trying to listen to super awkward arguments.” Shane offers a weak laugh. “You know, the more emotional the better.” Sebastian passes him the bottle. “Really though, sometimes I just wander around out here. I usually get lost though.”

“I guess that’s a risk when you’re drunk in the woods.” Sebastian smirks. Shane lets out a light laugh.

“Jokes on you, you have to find your way back drunk.” Sebastian grabs the bottle from his hand.

“If you say so.” He throws his head back as he finishes the bottle. Another few minutes of silence pass before Sebastian speaks. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Ugh, I regret this.” Shane flippantly rolls his eyes. “What do you want?”

“You heard everything with Abby.”

“Yeah, we’ve already covered that, in a very not subtle way.” Shane retorts.

“I just mean…do you, you know, think she was really talking about me in the mines? Or could it have been someone else?” He nervously picks at his hoodie sleeve.

“Honestly, I don’t know. She’s never really talked about you to me. Not that it means anything, we don’t usually talk about stuff like that.”

Sebastian feels a light stab of jealousy at his words.

“I didn’t think she really talked to anyone in town,” he practically whispers.

“Ah, I see what’s going on.” Shane stands up.

“Wait, what’s going on?” Sebastian stands to meet him.

“I think you need to ask yourself the real question.”

“And what’s that?”

“Do you want her to have been talking about you?” Shane and Sebastian lock eyes for a moment while the wind picks up around them. Despite the waves flowing through the trees, the world quiets.

“Yes,” it comes out soft, but he knows Shane hears it clearly. “But I don’t know why.”

“Have you tried talking to her about it?”

“No.”

“Well, that would be a good place to start.” Shane steps past Sebastian. 

“Shane,” Sebastian calls, stopping Shane.

“What now?” Sebastian chuckles at his agitation.

“Uh, thanks, for this. Whatever it was.”

“Yeah, whatever. Keep this shit to yourself.”

Shane resumes his walk away from Sebastian and out of the woods. Sebastian stands for a while, still staring at the river, thinking of only one thing. I need to talk to Enny.

Chapter Text

It’s dark. Too dark to see anything, but Enny can feel the vast emptiness of the room. No, not the room, the cave. She shivers, not because she’s cold, but because she knows she isn’t alone. A low familiar growl comes from all around her. She spins in circles looking for light, looking for an escape. 

But no light penetrates this eternal darkness. The growl becomes louder, deafening. It’s everywhere. Suddenly she feels a sharp pain in her ankle that radiates up her leg. Something has her and won’t let go. It’s biting deeper into her leg until she hears the familiar sound of bone crushing.

She screams, but no sound escapes her throat. The sound is louder, but she still can’t see it. Fear grips her and she can’t move. She’s frozen in place while her leg is eaten from her body. She closes her eyes and waits for death.

Enny wakes up screaming. She shoots up and immediately feels a sharp pain shoot through her stomach. She lets out a small cry and Harvey rushes through the doors. Why am I in the clinic?

“Enny. Try not to move.” He moves to her shoulder to gently lay her back down. “You’ll pull your stitches.”

She instinctively touches the source of the pain and feels a large bandage over the area.

“Don’t touch it either!” He yells. “You need to rest right now.”

“Wh-what happened?” Her voice is weak, head fuzzy, and it hurts her stomach to talk.

“You were attacked in the mines,” he hesitantly explains. “Maru and Demetrius brought you here.” She rests her head back on the pillow.

“I hate that man,” she huffs, feeling the scratchiness of an unused voice.

“I was not expecting that response,” Harvey lets out a small chuckle. “Regardless, he helped save your life.”

“Still hate him.” She looks around the room, but her vision is strained. The movement sends a pulse of pain through her head, and she instinctively grabs the front of it. She is met with more bandages, and realizes they are covering her right eye.

“Be easy with that.” He grabs her hand and pulls it away from her face. You had a nasty burn around your eye. It should heal just fine, but you have to leave it alone.”

“How long have I been here?” She asks weakly.

“Almost two days,” he answers while carefully watching her movements. 

“TWO DAYS?” She sits up in exasperation, only to feel like her stomach rips open.

“Enny,” he grabs her shoulder again. “You need to lay back.” Enny wants to get up, get out of this bed, leave this hospital, but relents from the pain.

“Harvey,” she strains to continue. “What happened?”

He pinches his eyebrows together in contemplation.

“What do you remember?”

“I went to the mines,” she tries to pull the memories forward. “Everything was fine. But then, there was this floor and there were so many monsters.” Her breathing picks up. “I just froze. I couldn’t move. I just watched it happen,” she gasps as though the air is being ripped from her lungs.

“Enny, focus on me. What do you see?” She turns and looks at his face.

“I see…I see….,” she frantically searches the room for anything to draw her focus until she lands on Harvey. “I see, stupid glasses.” He lets out a chuckle and her breathing begins to return to normal. But it is short lived as the panic surges through her again.

“Hey, Enny, stay with me. Tell me more about what you hate.”

“Pierre…that guy fucking sucks.” Harvey lets out a bigger laugh and she relaxes again.

“He isn’t my favorite person either,” he agrees.

“Finally something we can agree on,” she chuckles lightly, sending sharp pain through her stomach. The panic passes, leaving exhaustion and pain in its wake. “Can I go home?”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea.” Enny visibly deflates. “You lost a lot of blood and I’m worried about your panic attacks.”

“But I hate this room.” He can’t help but laugh again. “Please, I’ll come in as much as you want. I just don’t want to be here.”

“It’s late. Stay until the morning,” his voice thick with compassion, not authority. He is giving her a choice, instead of a command.

She sighs heavily, sending a fresh wave of pain through her stomach.

“Fine,” she concedes. “But I want to leave first thing.”

“Good choice,” he smiles in relief. “I have a few tests to run, but you should try to get some more rest.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she dismissively waves her hand. “Whatever you say.” Enny doubts she can sleep after 2 solid days, but she closes her eye to placate the damn man. After a few moments, she drifts off.

Enny tries to scream, but nothing comes out. She hears the ripping sound of flesh being torn from her body. She chokes on blood filled breaths. Suddenly, a high-pitched cracking sound and blinding light burns in her chest through her shoulder. It cuts through her to her soul. It will not only kill her, it will obliterate every part of her existence.

Enny wakes up gasping for air, but her lungs refuse to move. Frozen in fear, she balls up the blanket in her fists and pushes her lungs with her stomach. Searing pain radiates from her stomach, but she manages to suck in a tiny bit of air. She chases that small breath until her body can breathe on its own again. She looks around the room, remembering what brought her to this terrible place. I just want to go home. Enny hates hospitals. They all remind her of her brother. She wonders if her grandpa spent a lot of time in this one near the end. Enny hides that she used her brother as an excuse to avoid watching her grandpa die.

Loud voices from the hall disrupt her spiraling thoughts. Leah comes barging in shouting.

“You idiot!” She yells. “You had us all worried. What were you thinking?” She scolds Enny like a child.

“I-“

“You clearly weren’t thinking!” She cuts her off.

“I’m sorry.” Enny hangs her head in shame.

“I was just worried,” she says with sadness in her voice. “I didn’t know if you were going to be okay.”

“Leah,” Enny feels guilt and warmth in her words. “I am so sorry I worried you.” They sit quietly for a moment before Leah breaks the silence.

“You better be sorry,” she smirks. “Now let’s get you out of here before Harvey confiscates your arm as payment.”

“Oh Yoba, you’re right,” she cries. “He’s probably already taken some toes at least.” They laugh while Leah pulls some clothes out of her bag. “Is this a prison break?”

“Not quite,” she hands the clothes to Enny. “He asked if I’d take you home.”

“Really?” Enny blinks in surprise. “That was weirdly nice. I thought for sure he’d try to keep here longer.”

“Maybe he knew it was a lost cause,” Leah smiles mischievously.

Leah helps Enny change, careful not to disturb her bandages. She winces in pain, but it’s bearable and worth it to go home. Leah grabs Enny’s bag and positions herself under Enny’s shoulder at her side. Enny slowly takes a step and is met with pain in her leg.

“Fuck! That little fucker chewed up my leg.” Enny looks down at her ankle.

“I heard Marlon took its head for that.”

“Fuck. Seriously?” Enny didn’t know who actually pulled her out or how for that matter. “Was he alone? Is he okay? How did they even know I was in there?”

“Slow down, killer. We have plenty of time to talk about it while I nurse you back to health.” They walk towards the door.

“Come on Leah, you don’t really have to ‘nurse me back to health.’” Enny rolls her eyes.

“Oh, it’s not for you.” She dawns an evil smirk. “It’s payback for what you put me through.”

“You’re truly evil.”

The women laugh as they walk through the lobby.

“Enny, I want to see you first thing tomorrow morning,” Harvey calls.

“Yeah, yeah, don’t worry. You’ll get your pound of flesh,” Enny quips. Harvey doesn't respond, but Enny sees a small smile spread across his face.

The girls laugh even harder and pain pulses in her stomach. 

“Ow, ow. Laughing hurts.”

They walk outside and are met with the unforgiving brightness of the sun. It practically blinds Enny on contact. 

“Fucking sun.” She squints.

“It’s also mad at you.” 

“I’m pretty sure you have a monopoly on that.” Enny chuckles.

“I’m considering loaning it out in parts. I could make some good money that way.” Enny covers her heart with her free hand and pretends to be shocked.

“Seriously though Leah, please tell me what happened.” Enny pleads. “At least tell me Marlon is okay.”

“He is.” Leah hesitates to continue. “Him, Linus, and Robin heard you…” she trails off, unable to finish the sentence. “Anyway, I think Marlon fought whatever it was, while Robin and Linus pulled you out. I don’t know the rest of the details, but Maru and Demetrius drove you down. Eventually, Marlon showed up at Harvey’s with Robin and Linus. I don’t think it was serious. He didn’t stay too long.”

How could she face them again? They risked their lives for her. They could have died. All because she froze up. What’s wrong with me? Leah sees how Enny loses herself in thought.

“Hey, Enny, it’s okay. Everyone is okay.” She tries to soothe her.

“But it’s my fault they were down there. They could have died Leah.” The tears threaten to pour down her face.

“But they didn’t.” Leah sounds so stern. “That’s what we need to focus on. They’re okay and you’re okay.” Enny nods slightly and they walk back to the cabin in silence.

“Seriously though,” Enny attempts to change the subject. “You don’t have to take me home.”

“I’m your friend and the clinic sucks,” she says factually, like it’s obvious. “I had to spend a few days there last year and plotted several escapes.”

“Did any of them work?”

“Ugh, no. Harvey used his minion Maru as a prison guard.” The two girls lightly laugh. “I’m happy to help. I know we haven’t known each other very long, but it feels like a lifetime.”

“Yeah, I get the same feeling.”

“And if I’m being honest, you remind me a lot of your grandpa. It makes me feel like he’s still here with us.” 

“You really miss him, don’t you.” Leah just nods in confirmation.

“I miss him too.” Enny isn’t lying. She still misses her grandpa, no matter how much time passes. “You know, you remind me of him too.” A soft smile spreads across Leah’s face. “You’re so full of life and love for the valley. He was the same way.”

“Maybe, but I’m not a farmer.” 

“Me neither.” They both chuckle. “I’d much rather have animals.”

“He would say the same thing, but then produce the most gorgeous crops.”

“Oh shit!” Enny shouts. “The crops! How long have I been out? Are they okay?”

“Easy now.” Leah motions her to relax. “I’ve been taking care of them. The animals too. Everything is okay.”

“You did what? Leah, you really didn’t have to do any of that.”

“I know I didn’t have to. I wanted to, dummy.” She smirks. “I thought you were smarter than this…I might need to rethink our friendship.” 

“Hey! I’m a genius!” Enny defends. “I’m probably the smartest person who’s ever existed.” Leah laughs with more force than before. “What’s so fucking funny Leah? You don’t think I’m smart?” Leah just laughs harder. 

The two continue their laughs and company through bouts of pain, but Enny feels it’s worth it. When the farmhouse finally comes into view, Enny feels a pit grow in her stomach alongside the pain.

“Are you hungry?” Leah breaks through her thoughts.

“Uh,” she thinks for a moment. “Yeah, I could eat.”

“Perfect!” She beams.

Leah takes more of Enny’s weight as they slowly ascend the stairs to her door. Once inside, Enny sits down at the small table, while Leah rummages through a bag. She digs through it before producing a loaf of bread, some kale, cheese, and a jar of mayonnaise.

“That’s kind of a weird breakfast. Did you hit your head or something?”

“It’s for a sandwich!”

“Again, kind of weird, but I’m down.”

“Look closer you idiot.” She hands Enny the mayonnaise. Her eyes light up with realization.

“No fucking way!” She looks at Leah for confirmation. She wears the biggest shit eating grin. “This came from my chickens?”

“Yes, it did. They just started laying eggs yesterday. The kale is yours too. I brought the bread and cheese because honestly, kale is kind of blah on its own.”

“This is amazing! I can’t seriously believe this came from my farm.”

“I’m sorry you didn’t get to make it yourself, especially since it’s the first batch.”

“Don’t be. I’m freaking pumped!”

“Wow, so happy you used the word ‘freaking’ over your usual elegant language.”

“Fuck off.” She laughs. “Really though, this is the best surprise.”

Chapter Text

Tonight, starts like most nights. They show up at Shane’s door, practically knocking it down to get in. Shane laughs as he opens it. They immediately grab his arms and pull him into the hallway. He barely has time to lock his door on the way out. Together, the three of them practically sprint to the bar. He loves how playful they always were together. It brings him right back to being kids.

They walk into the bar and Shane breathes it in. “Hey Jason,” he calls to the bartender, “can we get our usual? First round is on me.”

“What! No!” Stella exclaims. “Tonight we’re treating you.”

“Stopppp, you always treat me, usually by sneakily picking up the tab when I go to the bathroom.” Shane retorts. They have a good laugh and make their way to the pool table in the back. They grew up playing at the saloon in the valley, but back then they had to sneak into the bar. Gus still caught them, but not before they would squeeze a game or two in. 

They play, eat, and drink until their stomachs hurt from laughter. They all stand up for another game when Shane realizes he is decently drunk. That is a bit harder to achieve these days with his newfound alcohol habit. 

“Woah Shane, try not to fall over,” Stella laughs. “Maybe we should call it a night.” 

“NOOOO!! It’s still early,” Shane says while trying to look at his phone, but the numbers don’t want to stay in focus. “How about one more game?” They both agree and Derick racks, while Shane disappears. He comes back a few minutes later, hands full of shots.

“Shane, no, we definitely can’t drink anymore,” Stella plays, with a slight concern in her voice. “We still have to drive home.”

“Come on, you only have like 1 mile to go and you haven’t even had that much to drink.” Shane reasons. Derick shrugs his shoulders and Stella lets out a sigh.

“This is the last one, you understand?” Stella threatens him with a finger wag. Shane’s face lights up with a smile as he hands over the drinks. They quickly throw back the shots and get back to their game. 

When they finish playing, they all loudly stumble out of the bar together. Stella had won and makes sure everyone in the bar knows. Shane laughs as she practically runs up to each patron asking if they know they were in the presence of greatness. Shane and Derick can barely stand up from laughing so hard. When they finally drag her out of the spotlight, they make their way down the street back towards Shane’s. Shane’s more than drunk now. That last shot put him over and he holds onto his friends the entire way home. They help him inside where he promptly passes out on the couch. 

The last thing he hears is the sound of Stella’s and Derick’s laughter as they head to their car.

Shane looks up at the ceiling fan as it struggles to continue its pointless life. The wood is worn and cracked. It probably spreads more dirt and dust than it helps. It’s just a sad fixture in his room, only there out of a misplaced sense of obligation to keep it.

He reaches for the half empty bottle on his nightstand and barely sits up before drinking it. He doesn’t stop until he completely empties it. He drops the bottle on the floor and lays there staring at the fan. What’s the point ? He thinks. Nothing matters.

“Shane?” Marnie calls while knocking on the door. “Are you up?”

He debates ignoring her, but guilt convinces him otherwise. She has done nothing but support him and Jas. The least he can do is answer her. 

“Y-yeah,” he grumbles. His voice rough from disuse and the alcohol. “What’s up?”

“Leah’s here. She says something’s wrong with one of Enny’s chickens. Could you go take a look at it?” 

“Sure, give me a few minutes.” 

It’s been a few days and there’s been little word about Enny. All anyone knows is that Leah’s been staying with her, and she goes to Harvey’s. He feels a touch of warmth as the alcohol settles into his stomach. And maybe by the feeling of being needed. 

He quickly gets dressed and walks out to Marnie’s shop. Leah is standing there chatting to Marnie. Both turn and look at Shane.

“Good morning, Shane,” Leah says softly. She’s one of the only people he never actively hates. “Thank you for doing this.”

“Don’t thank me yet. What’s wrong with the chicken?”

“Well, she hasn’t been eating and is lethargic. She barely moves and hasn’t laid any eggs today.”

“She’s definitely sick. Chickens try to hide when they’re injured or sick. If she’s that obvious, she’s probably in pretty bad shape.”

“Can you help her?” Leah looks worried.

“I’ll try. Take me to her.”

Together, they walk out the door and head to the farm. It’s a quiet walk until the coop comes into view. Leah leads him in and over to the sick chicken laying in the back.

Shane immediately rushes to her side and begins lightly pushing on its body. He thoroughly inspects her, lifting her wings and looking into her mouth. Then, he moves onto the other chicken for the same inspection. Finally, he hangs his head and sighs heavily.

“I’m not sure she’s going to make it.” It pains him to see her this way. He picked both chickens for Enny and cared for them since they were little hatchlings.

“What’s wrong with her?”

“I’m not sure.” He looks at Leah. “It doesn’t seem to be an injury. She’s not showing me any tender places. If I had to guess, she caught something. The other one seems okay, for now, but it would be safer to separate them. Just in case it’s contagious.”

“What can we do for her?”

“Keep her comfortable. Offer her lots of different foods and water. We need to stimulate her appetite somehow. If she doesn’t eat, she won’t recover. Have you told Enny?”

“Um, well, no.” Leah looks away. “It’s already hard enough to keep her from farming. I’m worried if I tell her, she’ll be impossible to keep away. I know I need to. I was just hoping to have more hopeful news when I do.”

“Yeah, she doesn’t seem like the bed resting type.” A smile forms on his face. “Still, she needs to know. You don’t want to blindside if she does die.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Leah looks at the ground. “She really cares for them. It’s going to break her heart.”

Shane looks up and groans.

“Look, you need to tell her.” He rubs his temple. “In the meantime, I’ll stay with her and see if I can get her to eat. I have a few ideas.”

“You would do that?” Leah looks at him.

“Yeah, but don’t you dare tell anyone. I’m just a sucker for chickens.” 

“You know, she told me you were secretly nice.” She smirks.

“Of course, she did.” He stands up and walks to the door. “I need to grab a few things from Marnie’s. I should be back in about 30 minutes. Stay with her until I get back.”

Leah just nods and Shane walks out the door. He pulls out his phone and calls that fucker from Joja. He answers on the first ring. Seriously, does that man ever sleep?

“Thank you for calling Joja Mart, your first step towards a more prosperous future. This is Morris speaking. How may I help you?”

“Morris, it’s Shane. I can’t come in today.”

“Shane, I don’t need to remind you of the importance and vision of Joja Mart. It is dependent on the hard work of all its employees. I need you to come in.”

“I already told you, I can’t. I never call out, I think you can manage it one day.”

“I’m going to have to write you up. That could permanently impede your ascension in the Joja Mart family.”

“You sound like a cult,” Shane chuckles. “Do whatever. I don’t care.”

He hangs up and keeps walking, smiling. That felt good.

Sebastian wakes up in a panic, covered in a cold sweat. He sits up and for a moment, doesn’t know where he is or even who he is. He’s just in this dark place and he wonders if he is dead. He just sits there, staring into the darkness, waiting for it to consume him.

Instead, the cold reality of his life slowly returns to him. He knows he is in his room in his basement, his own personal hell. Upstairs, he hears the muffled voices of Demetrius and Maru in the lab.

The pain in his chest burns through him. He feels the crushing weight of the world around him. The sting of Abby’s words echoes in his head. The fear of the man upstairs grips his throat. The pain of Enny’s near-death rips at his chest.

I wish I would never wake up . He feels tears fall from his chin. Sometimes, the pain of this world is overbearing. He thinks about when he tried to kill himself. He drank until he couldn’t see straight. Then he emptied the bottle of pills into his mouth. The next thing he knew, he woke up in some overcrowded city hospital.

Abby was the one who found him. He had passed out and she couldn’t wake him. He wonders what he could have done instead. He doesn’t want her to find him again, not just because he can’t do that to her. But also because he doesn’t want anyone to stop him. Maybe it would be better if no one ever found him.

He tries to shake the thoughts out of his head. Stop. You can’t do that again. You promised. He grabs his phone as a distraction. Obviously, Abby isn’t talking to him, but he does have one missed message from Sam.

Sam: Hey man. You okay? Haven’t heard from you lately

Sebastian : Hey Sam. I’m alright

Sam : That good huh?

Sebastian : I don’t know why I think you won’t see right through my bullshit…

Sam : I’m pretty sure that’s why you keep me around 😉

Sebastian : Well it sure isn’t for your skateboarding skills

Sam : HEY !

Sam : NOT COOL

Sam : I thought you lovvvvved meeeeee

Sebastian : I lied lol

Sam : I see how it is

Sam : See if I ever show you my sweet moves again

Sebastian : Oh no, how will I ever live?

Sam : You won’t. It’s tragic really

Sam : What are you up to today C-Bass

Sebastian : Oh probably wallowing in self pity, 

maybe partake in some self trash talk. The usual

Sam : Living that Saturday night life!

Sam : How do I get in on that action?

Sebastian : I don’t know. It’s a pretty exclusive club

Sebastian : I might be able to pull some strings

Sebastian : What do you have to offer?

Sam : Pizza!

Sebastian : You drive a hard bargain….I accept

Sebastian : Want to come over? We can game it up

Sam : Hell yeah I do!

Sam : I get off at 5. Can I come over after that?

Sebastian : It’s Saturday, why are you at work?

Sam : Shane called out so Morris made me show up. Said I’d get written up if I didn’t

Sebastian : Wtf he can’t do that

Sam : Yeah but I could use the extra cash

Sam : What’s really weird is Shane calling out. I don’t think the guy has ever missed a day of work

Sebastian : Did he say why?

Sam : No. I guess he was really vague about it

Sebastian : Okay….

Sam : Yeah man. It’s weird

Sam : Ugh I got to get back to work. I think Morris just saw me on my phone

Sebastian : I’ll tell your story after you’re gone. Probably through song

Sam : Stfu haha

Sam : See you tonight

Sebastian : See you then

Sebastian puts his phone down and thinks about his weird run in with Shane the other day. He’s right. He needs to talk to Enny. Sebastian has been there every day to try and talk to her. He needs answers. But every time he goes over there, she’s been asleep. Leah tells him she’s doing okay, just recovering. That she’s been up a little bit more, but mostly still sleeping. Harvey said she’s making a quick recovery, but it will take time for her to fully heal.

He's going to try again today. Anything is better than staying down here. He needs to know if she was really talking about him. He doesn’t feel like he can move forward until he talks to her. Something is definitely wrong with me.

He gets out of bed and ready to go. He walks upstairs and tries to quietly sneak past the lab with Demetrius and Maru.

“You know you could get more done in a day if you wake up earlier.” Demetrius doesn’t even look up from his beaker.

“Dad, leave him alone.” Maru says quietly, and for a moment, Demetrius stares daggers at her. She quickly retreats back into her work. “I’m sorry.”

“Maru, don’t let him poison you.”

Sebastian just sighs and walks toward the kitchen. It seems odd that Maru would defend him like that. She always seemed happy to be the golden child of the family. Maybe he’s been wrong. Doubtful. It’s just a fluke. No one in this family really cares about him.

He pours a cup of coffee from the pot and stands in the kitchen to drink it. He doesn’t want to walk by Demetrius again without some caffeine in his system. That pit of dread forms in his stomach at the thought of talking to his stepdad again. Sometimes he thinks about going through the window, just to avoid him. 

Sadly, he knows he has to walk past that shit excuse of a human. He sets the empty cup down in the sink and takes a deep breath before walking through the hall. He traces the knots and cracks in the wood, focusing on how it feels on his fingertips. He reaches the lab and keeps his eyes toward his mom’s shop.

Shit . She isn’t there. That means there’s nothing to stop Demetrius from his assault. He quickly rounds the corner, but nearly runs straight into the man he’s trying to avoid.

“I see you’re rushing out again, as usual.” His cold demeanor sends chills through Sebastian.

“Uh, yeah, I have some stuff I need to do.” He looks anywhere but at Demetrius.

“Sebastian, when are you going to learn that ‘stuff’ isn’t going to be a successful career path?” Sebastian doesn’t reply and Demetrius sighs. “Look, I know your mom would never say it, but we’ve been talking. You can’t live here forever. You need to start looking for a real job, and your own place.”

Sebastian’s chest tightens and the air feels thick. He focuses his gaze on the door. He just needs to get to that door and out of this house. 

“Sebastian? Are you even listening to me?”

“I get it okay. You don’t want me here.”

He steps around his stepdad and rushes out the door. Before he can think, he runs down the mountain path towards the farm. By the time his brain catches up with his legs, he’s staring at the back of Enny’s cabin.

He walks around, looking for Leah. He’s found her outside everyday and he doesn’t want to risk waking Enny by knocking on the door. He hears some voices coming from the coop. He walks over to it and finds Leah and Shane in front of the door with his mom.

“Sebby?” She says surprised. “I didn’t expect to see you here.” She smiles softly at him.

“What’s going on?” He asks. He sees a limp chicken in Shane’s arms.

“Your mom’s here to build a small temporary home for one of the chickens. She’s sick and needs to be quarantined,” Leah explains.

“I just finished up and we were about to introduce her to her new home.” She bends down to open the large crate. Half of it is fully enclosed while the other half looks more like a kennel. 

Shane carefully leans down to his knee and gently sets the chicken in the back of the enclosure. He fastens a feeder and water to the side, then sets a bowl of something gooey with a powder on top of it.

“What is that?” He asks.

“It’s honey and ginger.” Shane explains. “The honey might help her feel better and the ginger should stimulate her appetite.” 

He grabs a rag and dips it into the bowl. A small amount clings to it as he brings it over to her beak. He holds it in front of her face for a minute before sighing.

“I was hoping the smell would be enough to interest her.”

 He takes the small amount and rubs it along her beak. The chicken makes eating motions and a small cluck. 

“What do we do now?” Leah asks concerned.

“Now, we wait,” Shane replies emotionlessly. “Hopefully, she eats more and drinks some water. If not, well, there’s nothing we can do.” He looks away, hiding his face. “I’ll stay with her.”

“Thank you, Shane.” Leah puts a hand on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, yeah. Just don’t tell anyone I helped you. I don’t--,” Leah cuts him off.

“Need anyone to think you’re nice,” she says in a mocking tone. “I hate to break it to you, but they know. EVERYONE knows,” she chuckles.

“They do not.” He looks genuinely concerned.

“Don’t worry,” Leah laughs. “Your angry image is still intact.”

“Good. I’d hate to have to do something extreme to strengthen it.” Robin and Leah share a small laugh.

“Thank you so much Robin.” Leah turns to Sebastian’s mom. “This means a lot.”

“Anytime dear. Let me know if there’s anything else I can do.” Robin smiles. “I have to get back to the shop, but really, let me know if you need anything.”

“I will,” Leah responds.

“I’ll see you at home, Sebby.” 

Robin grabs her tools and walks back up the path. Leah looks at Sebastian.

“She was still asleep when I came out here, but I can go check again.”

“Oh, yeah,” he nervously says, not expecting an audience. “Thanks, Leah.”

She nods and disappears around the coop. He looks back at Shane who is still kneeling on the ground by the chicken.

“So, you haven’t talked to her yet,” it comes out more of a statement than a question.

“No,” Sebastian sighs. 

“Have you figured out what you’re going to say?”

“No,” he looks away. “Any suggestions?”

“Yoba no,” Shane chuckles. “I’m just here for the free entertainment.”

“It’s hard to believe that asshole image while you’re caring for a sick chicken.” He smirks slightly. “I heard you called out of work.”

“Fucking brat,” he grumbles. “Can’t keep anything to himself.”

Sebastian just laughs while Shane tries to hide a smile.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him why.”

“You better fucking not,” he threatens emptily.

They stay there while Shane gently pets the chicken. Finally, Leah returns. She motions Sebastian over and around the coop.

“She’s awake, but there’s something you need to know.”

“Okay…” he says nervously.

“She doesn’t know about the chicken yet.” She looks ashamed. “I’m going to tell her. I just wanted to wait until I knew more.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I won’t say anything about it.” Leah gives him a weak smile.

“Thanks, Sebastian.”

“She’s really lucky to have a friend like you.” Leah blushes at his statement.

“I don’t know about that.”

“I do.”

“I’m just doing what any neighbor would.”

“You’re going to stand here and tell me any neighbor would care for someone AND their entire farm that they only knew for a few weeks?”

“Well, when you put it like that, it does sound a little strange. She just reminds me so much of her grandpa. He took care of me in the same way.”

They walk up the rest of the way up to the cabin in silence. He looks up and sees Enny sitting on the porch swing. She has a patch over her eye and bandages just above her foot. What’s most shocking are the dark bruises lining the side of her face. He knew she was attacked and nearly died, but no one really knew how bad it was.

“I’m going to head into town for a bit. I need to stop at Pierre’s, but I’ll be back in an hour or two. Text me if you need me back sooner,” Leah says.

“Thanks Leah,” Enny responds.

They wait for Leah to disappear down the eastern path before Enny finally breaks the silence. 

“You can sit down if you want.”

His body moves, without thinking, to sit next to her on the swing. They sit in an awkward silence just staring out over the crops. This feels familiar somehow . Like he’s done it before. Her voice snaps him from his thoughts.

“Leah said you’ve been here every day,” she says slowly.

“Y-yeah,” he struggles to get out. His throat suddenly feels dry. “Sorry, that probably sounds pretty weird.”

“I mean, a little. I know people have been asking about me and a few have shown up, but none of them come every day,” her voice sounds quiet.

“Do you…want me to leave?” His face drops.

“No, not at all!” She frantically waves her hands in front of her face. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean….umm…” she trails off.

“You’re wondering why?” He finishes.

“Well, yeah,” he lets out an exasperated laugh. 

“Me too,” he rakes his hand through his hair and instinctually reaches for his pack of cigarettes. 

Gross. The dream flashes through his head and he pulls back his hand. She watches him intently as he reaches for his pocket and then stops. 

“Sebastian, what’s going on?” She sounds worried.

“How much do you remember from your attack?”

“Honestly, not much.” She looks down at her feet. “I got attacked in the caves. Next thing I knew, I was in the clinic.”

“So, you don’t remember when they pulled you out?” A blush crosses her face.

“No, just that it was Marlon, Linus, and your mom who pulled me out. Then Maru and Demetrius drove me to Harvey’s,” her voice gets low. “They said Marlon got hurt,” she stops for a moment to wipe away the forming tears. “It could have been worse. It could have been Linus or your mom. They could have died.”

“Hey, hey, Enny, it’s okay.” He reaches his hand out to rub circles into her back. “They’re okay.”

“But it shouldn’t have happened at all,” she can’t hold back the tears. “They could have been killed and it’s my fault.”

“But they weren’t, and I’ve talked to my mom. She doesn’t regret going down there. She cares about you.”

Enny cries harder and leans into Sebastian’s side. He wraps his other arm around her and holds her while she sobs.

“You don’t understand,” she says between sniffles. “It’s my fault. I was down there and suddenly just froze. I couldn’t move. I screwed up.”

“You didn’t screw up. It’s normal to get scared when creatures are attacking you. I think most people in your situ--.” She cuts him off.

“I’m not most people!” She snaps. “I’m supposed to be better than that. If I had been, things would be different.” A deeper sadness flashes in her eyes. It hurts him to see the pain she carries. 

He feels her tense up and she slowly pulls away from him. She wipes the remaining tears and fixes her plastic smile.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to blow up like that.”

What just happened? Did I say something wrong? Why the sudden change? 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“It’s fine really,” she pauses before continuing. “Was there more you wanted to talk about?”

“Well, yeah, but we don’t have to if you’re not feeling up to it.”

“I’m okay, really. What’s up?”

“It’s just, my mom said something about that night.”

“Okay…”

“She said you, well, um,” he rubs the back of his neck nervously. “You said you loved, um, someone named Sebastian?” It comes out as a question while his face burns at the confession. She looks stunned and her face freezes in place. “I was just wondering, if um, it was, you know…”

“About you?” She barely whispers.

“Yeah.” He lets out a deep breath. “Sorry. That probably sounds dumb.”

“What else did she say?”

“Just that.” 

“Oh,” she looks pensive. “Okay.”

A long silence engulfs them before she finally continues.

“It wasn’t you,” she says flatly as though she’s disconnected from this moment. “It was another Sebastian that I knew before moving here.”

Suddenly, the wind feels as though it was torn from his chest. His vision becomes hazy and a knot forms in his stomach. Someone else? Why does that hurt so much to hear?

“I’m sorry if that made you feel weird. I know how gossip spreads in a small town like this. I don’t want people getting the wrong idea. I know you’re dating Abby and that could be really awkward.” 

“It’s fine,” he says sharply. “It wasn’t weird at all. I was just curious.”

He stands up and begins to walk away.

“Sebastian, wait.” She tries to stand. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“I’m not upset,” agitation lines his voice. “Why would I be upset? I barely know you. I would be upset if you were talking about me. This is great news.”

She takes a step forward, but he moves out of reach. There’s a fearful look on her face.

“Sebastian, please,” she pleads.

“I’m sorry I bothered you.” He looks away from her, trying to hide his own hurt. Why the fuck does this hurt? “I’ll see you around, I guess.” He walks off down toward the southern path.

As he walks by the coop, he turns to look at Shane still sitting on the ground.

“I hope you enjoyed the show,” his voice drips with sarcasm. “Thanks for the advice.”

He continues down the path and away from the farm.

Chapter Text

It’s been two weeks since the accident in the mines and Enny has felt every moment of it. Every day is the same. She wakes up, goes to see Harvey, goes back to bed, wakes up, sits on the porch, gets yelled at for trying to water her crops, then goes back to bed. She’s never been good at doing nothing, but this is worse than that. She can’t leave her farm. She’s stuck here with nothing but her thoughts. 

Every night, she either dreams of her old life or her death. She wakes up and feels precious time slip by her. She should be in the mines or learning more about this world’s Enny. Instead, she’s cooped up in her small cabin every single day. 

She’s very thankful for all Leah’s help, but she’s been feeling like a warden. That changes today. Today, she gets the rest of her stitches and bandages removed. Harvey said if she’s on track with her healing, he’ll clear her to do light work and take walks.

Enny practically jumps out of bed and gets dressed. As she opens the door, Leah appears on the other side.

“You’re up already!” Leah smiles. “I was just about to come get you.”

“I am up and ready to go to Harvey’s.” Enny grins from ear to ear.

“Alright, then let’s go.” 

They descend the stairs together and Enny waves to Shane as they pass by the coop. Since her chicken nearly died, he’s been here every day to check on them. It’s sweet to watch how he cares for them. It’s such a gentle side to such a grumpy man. She’s eternally grateful for his help and saving her chicken. 

Enny was heartbroken when Leah told her about the poor little chicken. They didn’t think she’d survive the night, but Shane never left her side. By the morning, she was up and moving around again. Her appetite came back slowly, and she made a full recovery. Still, Shane continues to come by every day. He claims it’s because Enny ‘is a poor excuse for a rancher,’ but she knows how much they mean to him. 

She hasn’t seen Sebastian since that day. Of course it bothers me. I’m so stupid. He seemed so upset when she told him she was talking about a different Sebastian. For once, it wasn’t even a lie. Maybe he deserves to know the truth, but he’ll just think I’m crazy.

Sometimes she thinks she is. That this whole thing is just some delusion in her head. She keeps hoping to wake up in her old bed with a sleeping Sebastian as Izzy jumps on top of them. That this will all have been a nightmare. But a dark corner of her mind tells her she’ll never return home. It fuels a fear deep in her soul that grows every day she’s here. 

“We’re here.” Leah opens the door for Enny.

“Good morning, Enny and Leah,” Harvey calls from behind the counter. “You’re a little early today.”

“I can’t help it. I’m excited to never see your face again.” She gives him an evil smirk. 

“I’m happy to see you’re in a good mood,” he chuckles softly.

“I’m going to head to Pierre’s,” Leah chimes in. “Shoot me a text when you’re done.”

“Will do!” Enny says eagerly.

Leah leaves the clinic while Harvey gives Enny a suspicious look.

“What’s your problem now?” Enny says defensively.

“Are you really going to lie to her like that?” He raises an eyebrow.

“I didn’t lie to her! I’ll definitely text her when I’m done. Just maybe not the exact moment, but like many moments after that.”

“Uh-huh,” he chuckles. “Whatever you say.”

“Look Doc, we have patient confidentiality. So, mind your business and mine.”

He lets out a small laugh while walking out from behind the counter.

“Come on back. Let’s see about getting those bandages off.”

It only takes about 30 minutes to remove everything. The stitches sting a little, but otherwise she feels good. Enny takes a few tentative steps without the stitches in her stomach and leg, and it already feels better than before.

“I expected it to be harder without all the stuff supporting me.”

“Quite the opposite. All that ‘stuff’ actually limited your movement so it could heal properly. Without it, you’re more likely to hurt yourself again.”

“So, no marathon running?”

“No anything really.” Enny chuckles, but Harvey’s face remains serious. “I mean it. Your internal injuries are still healing, and you haven’t recovered yet from your blood loss. It’ll be easy to hurt yourself or pass out. No farming, no mining, and no extended periods on your feet. You need to take a lot of breaks until your body finishes healing.”

“How long will that take?”

“Probably another month.”

“Come on, you can’t be serious. I already feel great.”

“I’m very serious. These aren’t the kind of injuries to gamble with. If you pull your stitches, you could cause internal bleeding. I’ll have to do more surgery and you’ll be out even longer.”

“Fine, yeah, I get it,” she grumbles. “I’ll take it easy.”

“Good. If, and this is a big if, you follow your rehab treatment and your body allows it, it might be closer to two weeks.”

Enny’s face lights up.

“I will do everything you say!”

“Don’t get your hopes up too high. It’s a big ‘if.’”

“I wouldn’t dare. I’ll keep them low. All the way on the ground.”

He rolls his eyes and hands her some paperwork.

“This is your at-home treatment. I still want you to come in every morning for some rehab work here. Then I can monitor your progress.” She takes the papers and quickly scans over the instructions. 

“No worries, Doc. I’ll keep up the act.” She smiles devilishly. “I’d hate for people to find out you’re not actually a doctor.”

“Oh Enny, what would I do without your delightful conversation every morning?”

“You’re going to find out real soon. But my guess is, you’ll be very unfulfilled without me in your life.” She can’t stop the smile pulling hard at her lips.

“Get out of here,” a laugh slips through his serious demeanor. “Try not to avoid Leah for too long. I will happily share your private medical information if she comes looking for you.”

Enny’s jaw drops in fake shock.

“I thought you were a professional!”

“It’s a front.” A small smile creeps along his face.

“Alright, alright, I’m just going for a walk around town.”

He gives her a knowing look.

“Okay, fine. A SHORT walk around town.”

“That’s better.” He ushers her to the door. “Let me know if you need anything or feel any pain. Otherwise, I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Bye, Doc.” She waves as she walks out the door. 

Even though she was just outside, the day feels brighter and more alive without her stitches. She decides a walk to the library for some research will be good. It’s not too far and it ends with her sitting.

It’s still early as she walks through the town, but she sees a few townspeople already out. Abby’s mom, Caroline, and Sam’s mom, Jodi, are both out in the town square chatting. As she walks by, they turn and stare in surprise. It’s Caroline who finally blurts out.

“Enny? You’re here! Walking even.”

“Yep, that’s me.” She rubs the back of her neck. “Professional walker in training.”

“It’s good to see you out. You must be feeling better,” Jodi says.

“Good enough that the kind doctor finally freed me from his gruesome malpractice.” She leans in to whisper, “I didn’t need the stitches until AFTER I went to see Harvey.” They give her mortified looks, clearly uncomfortable with her joke. “Kidding,” she stammers. “I’m just kidding. I’m sorry. I really should get going though.”

Neither woman responds by the time Enny’s halfway across the square.

“Have you ever thought about not being so awkward?” A voice calls from the other side of the saloon.

“It’s part of my charm. I didn’t expect to run into you out here. I thought you had to go to work after you were done with the chickens?”

“I’m on my way there now,” Shane says. “I just couldn’t resist watching that dumpster fire,” he chuckles.

“Yeah, yeah, hilarious, I know.”

“Where’s your shadow? I thought she had you on a tight leash.”

“The leash is gone, baby!” She shouts.

“So, you snuck out of Harvey’s without telling her?” He raises his eyebrow.

“It can be two things.” They share a small laugh.

“Try not to pass out. She might kill you.”

“She definitely would.”

“Can I walk you to wherever it is you’re making a break to?”

“I’m just headed to the library. I was going to take the south path over, but the north one through the trees would have less people.”

“Yeah, I can see why you’d want to avoid people with social skills like that.” Enny flips him off.

“Yeah, yeah, real funny,” she dryly laughs. “Can I just walk with you to Joja?”

“Let’s go.”

They fall into a comfortable silence as they stroll through the town. Enny can’t walk as quickly as she’d like, but Shane seems content to keep her pace. As they pass Pierre’s she sees a dark cladded man walking down the stairs behind the shop. At the same time, he looks up and their eyes meet. He stops for a moment, then turns to take the long way around Pierre’s.

“Lover’s quarrel with Fall Out Boy?” Shane questions.

“What? No! Of course not,” she flounders. “We’re not, no, it’s not like that at all.”

“Sure,” he draws out the one syllable word. “I definitely have weird fights full of sexual tension with my friends, then ignore them for weeks.”

“You heard that?” Her voice sounds weak.

“Yeah, sorry.” He almost looks embarrassed. “I was taking care of the chicken. I didn’t mean to listen, but I couldn’t exactly leave.”

“Yeah, no, that makes sense.” She looks down at the ground. A long silence passes before she speaks. “There wasn’t any sexual tension. And besides, he has a girlfriend. And I mean, I’m not even interested like that.” I’m just projecting my feelings for my husband onto someone else.  

“Right, about that.” Enny looks up to Shane. “Him and Abby broke up.”

For a moment, Enny just stares at Shane in silence, as her heart flutters.

“What are you talking about?”

“It’s all the town's talking about right now. I’m surprised you didn’t hear it just walking for 30 seconds through it,” he chuckles. 

“No, I was too busy making an ass of myself to Caroline and Jodi.”

“Oh yeah, that’ll be the new hot goss this week.”

“Gross, don’t say that,” she laughs. “Seriously though, I didn’t know you were such a gossip.” 

“Hey, I just thought you might want to know.”

“Why would you think that?” She becomes serious.

“Well for one thing, you lied to him during that ‘not lover’s quarrel.’”

“I didn’t lie to him. I really was talking about someone else.”

“Yeah? Someone else named Sebastian? Definitely not the Sebastian you gawk at.”

“Shut your fucking face! I do not,” she yells at him.

“Right, my bad,” he laughs. “You definitely don’t.”

“Please tell me I’m not that obvious,” her face burns bright red.

“Only to me and Leah.” 

“Oh great! What else do you two talk about when I’m not around?”

“Mostly our mutual agreement in your subpar chicken skills.”

“Ugh you two are truly the worst.” She rolls her eyes dramatically. “I’m surprised you even talk to her. You know she’s a living, breathing human right?”

“Yeah, I know. I’m a sucker. Something about her makes her impossible to hate. Especially, since she’s been taking care of you and your farm.”

“Wow, you’ve grown soft. I didn’t know you cared so much about me.” She grabs his arm. “When are you going to ask me out, handsome?” She blows him a kiss and he pulls his arm out of her grip.

“Gross, that would be like dating my sister.”

“Please tell me you actually have a sister!” Enny lights up at the thought.

“I did.” Shane’s face twists into something more solemn. “Sort of.” Oh. Fuck Enny. Good job.

“I’m sorry, I didn--.”

“Don’t worry about it. It was a long time ago.”

“That doesn’t make it suck any less.” He smiles weakly in response while stuffing his hands in his hoodie pocket.

“Yeah, you’re right.” He looks up at the sky. “Her name was Stella. She was my best friend,” he pauses, “and Jas’s mother. She was my cousin, but lived with me after her parents died.” He smiles, not to Enny or himself, but to something beyond what she can see. “Anyways, she was an asshole too. I think you would have gotten along, probably too well.”

“I mean, if she could put up with you, she must have been pretty badass.” Enny gives him a gentle nudge as a pained smile tugs at his face.

Enny only knew that Jas’s mother died when she was young. She didn’t know how or that she was Shane’s cousin. To be fair though, Shane had already died by this time in her world. 

“I had a brother,” she says quietly.

Shane stops and looks at Enny. 

“I didn’t know.”

“Most people don’t. He never came here as a kid, and I don’t exactly talk about him.” They resume walking as Joja Mart comes into view. She feels a little guilty talking about her brother when she doesn’t actually know if it happened here.

“What was his name?”

“Ares,” she chuckles to herself. “We were twins and my parents thought naming us after the gods of war was clever or some shit. He didn’t mind Ares too much, but Enyo doesn’t exactly fit in. Hence, Enny.”

“That’s some nerdy shit,” he chuckles lightly. “Stella hated the stars.” A warm smile spreads across his face. “Didn’t like being compared to them.”

“Those are some big shoes to fill.” She pinches her face in contemplation. “Do stars wear shoes?”

“Idiot.” He rolls his eyes, but his smile only grows. Joja finally comes into view before he continues. “You sure you don’t want me to walk you to the library? I’d hate for something to happen to you because Leah will just know that I left you out here alone. She’s small but I have no doubt she’d fuck me up.”

“She definitely would,” Enny laughs, knowing Leah would blame both of them. “I’ll be okay though. Thanks for the company this far. I kind of like having you around.”

“Keep that shit to yourself.”

“Oh no, it’s too late. We’re friends.”

“Buhh,” he groans loudly. “I hate you.” 

“No, you don’t.” She gives him a playful smirk. 

“No, no, I don’t,” he sighs. “Just get the fuck out of here before someone sees.”

“Don’t worry baby,” she shouts loud enough for the nonexist people nearby to hear. “I’ll see you later tonight!”

“Yoba, you’re insufferable.” 

He turns and heads into the store, trying to hide his grin, while Enny laughs behind him. She’s surprised how close they’ve become here. They talk almost every day when he stops by, and more than once he’s brought over some pizza for the three of them to share. 

Her smile falls when she thinks about returning home. It hurts her to know her relationships here won’t exist in her world, but with Shane it’s different. He’ll be dead. She will never have the chance to get to know him there like she knows him here. She wonders what will happen here after she leaves. Will the other Enny come back? Will they miss her? Or will they think she abandoned them?

She can’t get hung up on those thoughts. She needs to find a way back home, no matter what the cost. She knows she’ll need to go back to the desert, but until she heals, she’ll have to settle for library research. 

She comes up to the library and is greeted enthusiastically by Gunther when she walks in.

“Enny! What a pleasant surprise,” he says cheerfully.

“Morning, Gunther. How’s it going?”

“It’s better now. The whole town’s been worried about you. I’m glad to see you doing so well.”

“Yeah, Harvey finally let me go out for a walk today.”

“And you decided to come here? I’m honored.”

“You say that now, but you’re going to get sick of me real quick.” They both chuckle.

“I doubt that. Is there something I can help you with while you’re here?”

“Actually, yeah. I just want to use the computer again if that’s okay.”

“Of course. Do you need help getting back there?”

“No, I’m okay. Thanks Gunther.” She waives as she walks to the computer.

Enny awkwardly sits down in front of the screen with one goal in mind. Her brother. She knows what she might find, but she has to look. Shane’s alive, maybe he is too . She types his name into the search bar and on the first page she sees it. His memorial announcement. She closes her eyes. Breathe. In. Out. Just breathe. She expected this, but it still hurts. It’s like losing him all over again. 

She collects herself and opens the page. The first thing she sees is his picture. It’s a picture she took of the two of them together when they first moved to the city. It’s before the bruises and shattered bones. Before the blood and contorted body. Back when his smile lit up every room. She can still feel how safe his laughter made her feel and how the image of his final face scarred her memories of him. 

The picture, wording, and date are the same. Even in this world, it seems he suffered the same fate. She played over the events leading up to his death countless times, trying to think of what she could have done differently. If she hadn’t picked up that late shift from work. If she had just walked home instead. If she didn’t beg him to pick her up. They wouldn’t have been in that car accident and he wouldn’t be dead. 

She thought she’d feel some sick twisted sense of relief knowing it still happened here. That it would maybe absolve her from some of her guilt. Instead, it hurts her even more. He still suffered. Was there any world he was still alive in? The question haunts her.

“Enny?” A voice comes from behind her.

She quickly exits out of the browser and turns to face Elliott.

“Oh, Elliott. You scared me.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course. I’m fine.” She forces a weak smile.

“Are you sure? You’re crying.”

She touches her face and feels wet streaming from her eyes. She quickly wipes away the tears.

“Oh this? It’s um, just allergies,” she lies. 

“Enny, it’s okay to be upset,” he consoles.

“I’m sorry Elliott. I wasn’t expecting this or to run into anyone. I’m just embarrassed.” She clears her throat and shakes her head, as though she’s shaking the thoughts away. “So, are you here doing research for your book?” He lights up.

“Yes, I am! It’s going quite well.”

“Does that mean you picked a genre?”

“Not exactly. I realized my indecision came from the art demanding to live across genre boundaries. It will incorporate themes from several different literary types featuring a displaced heroine”

“It sounds exciting.” And familiar.

“I agree. I just hope I can bring it to life the way it demands.”

“I have no doubt you will,” she smiles. 

“Thank you, Enny. I owe this all to you and your insight.”

“I’m merely your guide.” She smiles. “You’re the artist.”

“Regardless, thank you.”

“I’m happy to help.”

Chapter Text

Enny holds the training blade straight out in front of her, trying to keep it level with her chin. Fire burns through her arm in retaliation.

“Why am I doing this? I’m supposed to be learning how to actually use it, not hold it,” despite her frustration, she struggles to get the words out through pained breathing. “Shockingly, I’ve been holding things my whole life. I’m somewhat of an expert on it,” Enny snarks, but again the words are more labored than she intends.

“You can’t wield it properly until you build the strength in your arm. Endurance is critical in a fight. Otherwise, you will only get one or two strikes in before your arm gives out,” Marlon responds.

“Ugh, this is the worst. How long have I been holding it? Like 20 minutes?”

“One.”

“You’re lying!” She yells in disbelief, the sword wavering in her hand, but he just chuckles.

“It takes time and practice, and also push ups. Just be patient.”

“Fucking push ups?” She shouts, her arm finally succumbing to the weight of the blade with a grunt. “That’s asking too much.” She grabs the sword with her other arm to shake out her sore muscles. He grins at her reply, letting out a soft chuckle. “One day, I’m going to challenge you to a duel and wipe the floor with your face.” Enny returns the training blade back to its extended position.

“You can try,” his warm laugh forces a smile to spread across her face.

Enny shoots up with a pain shooting through her head. 

“Ugh,” she groans while grabbing her head. The dreams suck sure, but why the headaches?  

It’s Sunday and Enny plans to sneak out today to visit Marlon, and hopefully see Linus on the way. She wants to visit Robin and Maru too. She needs to thank them both and really wants a new barn, but worries she’ll run into Sebastian.

But none of that matters, if she can’t get past Leah. She was less than thrilled to find Enny had walked off without her after Harvey’s. Leah’s done what she can to keep better track of Enny, only allowing chaperoned walks around town. So, she has spent time walking with Leah, Shane, Elliott, and Emily. It is nice to spend time with each of them, but she is ready to go up the mountain…alone.

Enny has been secretly training with her sword. The pain in her stomach prevents her from doing much, but she’s practiced wielding it and some basic stances. The last couple of days, she’s been able to hold it out longer and with minimal pain, but she cringes at the thought of push ups.

Harvey says her body is healing well, but slowly. He continuously tells her to ‘take it easy’ and ‘see me every day’ and ‘absolutely no you can’t harvest those melons.’ Which is why Enny is surprised to wake to a voicemail from the man canceling their appointment. He isn’t feeling well and doesn’t want to risk getting her sick while she recovers. 

She suspects Leah is here already tending to her farm. The plan is to convince Leah that Enny wants to stay in for the morning and sneak off for a walk. The problem is how. Leah is rather protective and restrictive of Enny. She knows it won’t be easy.

None of that matters when she opens her front door to find Shane watering the crops.

“Chicken Shit Man!” She yells. “What are you doing here?”

“Accident Waiting to Happen, oh wait, it already did!” He yells back. “Leah asked me to help out this morning. Something about art or whatever.”

“Can I help?” Hope in her voice.

He thinks for a moment before answering, giving her excitement time to bubble at the thought of working.

“Honestly, I don’t know shit about farming. I think I’m done watering. But I don’t know what to do next.”

“It looks like those melons can be harvested.” She points to the small patch of pink fruit bursting from the ground. 

“How the fuck do I harvest?” Enny gives a deep laugh, sending a dull pain through her stomach.

“Here, let me show you.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re not allowed to do that.”

“I promise I won’t actually do it.” She rolls her eyes, but is secretly upset that her plan already failed.

Together, they walk over to the melons. Enny bends down to the nearest one and grabs at the base of the stalk. 

“You want to break it off an inch or two above the melon. It keeps it from rotting. That’s pretty much it.”

“It just breaks off?”

“Hopefully. They’re a good amount of ripe, so they shouldn’t take too much work. You can use a knife or even the scythe. Just be careful. The scythe is a bit overkill.”

“How the fuck do you know so much about farming? Aren’t you from the city?”

“Yeah, but I spent a lot of time here as a kid. My grandpa taught me everything I know.”

“And someone as thick-skilled as you remembered it? I’m impressed.” He smirks.

“Me too,” she smiles faintly at the thought of her time here with her grandpa. “I guess he was just that good of a teacher. Personally though, I hated farming. I just liked the animals.”

“That definitely doesn’t show,” he snides.

“Hey now! I’m great with the animals,” she raises her voice to refute his claim. “You just sold me a dud of a chicken.”

“You rotten little shit!” He yells. “My chickens are perfect. You’re a bad rancher!”

They both laugh as Shane finishes pulling the last stalk from the melons. Enny loves their time together. It warms her soul, bringin some sort of comfort in this alienating world. With him, there’s no anxiety, just acceptance and friendship.

“Alright, now what?”

“Just take them over to the bin by the cabin. They’ll get taken out later.”

He grabs two at a time and walks them over to the wooden crate.

“I met your grandpa once,” he starts, pulling Enny’s attention immediately. “He wasn’t doing well and couldn’t take care of the farm. He didn’t care about the crops, but he didn’t want to watch the animals suffer.”

Enny never knew what happened to the farm before he died. She never wanted to ask. She was afraid of what she might hear.

“After I moved here with Jas, he went to Marnie and asked her to take care of the animals. He wanted to just give them to her, but she refused unless she could pay him. She was bluffing, but she wanted to help him anyway she could.”

“That sounds like him.” Tears prick at Enny’s eyes. “He loved his animals. They were family to him.”

“I came up here with her to get them. He was sitting on that porch you sit on every morning. We all knew he had cancer, but he had the stupidest smile. He stood up and showed us to the barn and coop, and that idiot tried to help us load them up. Which is probably where you get your stupid from.”

Enny looks down at her hands and chuckles. 

“I hated it,” he smiles to himself. “I hated him,” he pauses. “But it didn’t faze him. When we were leaving, he thanked us. It hurt him to send them off, and he cried when he said goodbye.”

Enny tries to fight back her own tears as she imagines the pain he went through near the end. She wasn’t there for him..

“At the time, I was really angry.”

“You’re still really angry, Shane.”

“Yeah,” he smiles weakly. “But this was different. I used to love chickens, but they made me so mad. It was right after Stella died and I was so bitter. I get it now. They reminded me of her and when we were kids. Then your grandpa showed such real emotion over them. So when we brought them home, I unloaded them all into the barn and coop, and….I yelled at them.” He looks away, hiding his face.

“You did what?” Enny’s jaw drops. “You yelled at them?”

“Yeah, I’m not proud of it.” He rubs the back of his neck nervously. “But then this one stupid little chicken walked right up to me, puffed up, clucked angrily, and fucking bit me in the leg,” he chuckles at the memory. “I fell backwards and landed on my ass, and just stared at it. I had no idea what just happened.”

“It sounds like you deserved it,” she chuckles, imagining this overgrown man-child being cornered by a chicken.

“Then, that little fucker than had the nerve to walk back up to me and nestle itself under my arm. I was too shocked and honestly too afraid to move it. So, we stayed there for about an hour before it finally got up and just walked away like nothing happened.”

“I think I would like this chicken.”

“Well, funny enough, you do, in a way.” Enny looks quizzically at Shane.

“What do you mean?”

“I took care of that little shit. She was older, but I spent every day with her until the end. But she had one little chick after that, and I took care of that one too. Most of the eggs they produce are sold and we only breed them at select times.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying, both of your chickens are granddaughters of that little shit.”

She stares at Shane for a moment, not sure what to say. In a way, she’s had her grandpa’s chickens this whole time. Tears silently stream down her face.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would make you cry. I thought you’d wan—”

Before he can finish, she pulls him in for a hug. He stands shocked before putting his arms around her too.

“Thank you, Shane.” 

“Well, you know, keep it to yourself and whatever.”

“No. I’m going to tell everyone,” she sniffles.

“Buhh, I hate you,” he groans.

She pulls away while they both laugh. She wipes the tears from her face and they both stare out over the crops.

“So, what now?” He asks. “With the crops, I mean.”

“I think there are some new seeds in the chest over there.” She points near the mailbox. 

“Alright, then let’s get to it.”

They walk over and dig through the chest, finding just enough seeds to plant where the melons had been. It’s a small patch and takes little time to finish. 

“Farming sucks,” Shane complains as he wipes away some lingering sweat on his forehead.

“Yes, it does,” Enny laughs in comradery.

“What’s next?” He asks.

“Well, I was going to sneak off and walk up to see Marlon and Robin.” Shane raises an eyebrow skeptically.

“Bold move. Leah would hunt you down.”

“Hey, I had a plan. A good plan.”

“Oh yeah? Tell me about this ‘good’ plan.”

“Well, it involved convincing her I wanted to stay in.”

“Already would have failed.”

“You don’t know that!”

“I definitely do. You’ve done everything you can to get out of the cabin every day. There’s no way she would have fallen for it.”

“Yeah,” Enny sighs. “You’re probably right.”

“But, I don’t need to be tricked.” He smirks, almost mischievously.

“Seriously? You’ll let me go?” Enny’s eyes light up as the excitement bubbles up once again.

“I’ll go with you. The mountain trail is still harder than walking around town.” Enny beams at him.

“Shane, you are the fucking best!” 

“Yeah, yeah. Come on. Let’s go before I change my mind.”

They pack up the farming equipment and Enny stops to grab some gold.

“What’s that for?” Shane asks as they walk towards the path.

“I want to ask Robin to build me a barn. I almost had enough before the mines. I tried to pay Leah for her help, but shockingly, she refused. Every time I sneak her some gold, she sneaks it right back. I’ve given up and decided to use it to get some cows. I can take care of animals easier than crops. So, more animals, less work Leah has to do.”

“You know that means we might run into someone Taking Back the day,” he smirks, obviously biting back a laugh.

“Taking Back the day?” Enny thinks. “Sunday? Why would someone be taking back Sund—” She stops and sighs. “Yoba, you’re so dumb. How long have you been waiting to use that one?”

“Since the day I met him. I just didn’t have anyone to tell.” A full smile spreads across his face at his own wit.

“Well, I’m honored to be your chosen friend,” they share a laugh while continuing up the path. 

“You know, he’ll probably be there.”

“Yeah, I know.” She stares intently at the ground.

“Things still weird between you two?”

“If by weird, you mean I haven’t talked to him since that ‘definitely not a fight,’” she sighs. “I’ve seen him walking around town, but he pretty obviously avoids me.”

“What’s with you two?”

“It’s complicated,” she hesitates. “Mostly, it sounds crazy.”

“I like crazy. Your life is my favorite source of entertainment,” he laughs weakly.

“Haha, very funny,” her fake laugh elicits a small smile from Shane. “Honestly, I barely even know him.”

“Could have fooled me.”

“Okay, well I did run into him my first night here.”

“Go on,” he encourages.

“He had a panic attack. All I did was help him through it.”

“That’s it?” He pinches his face, unable to understand.

“Well, then there was the next night.”

“Ooh, two nights in a row.” He grins.

“It’s not like that. I ran into him in the community center.”

“Of course you broke into the community center,” he rubs his temples.

“Well, yeah, but there’s this whole magical Junimo thing, but that’s not important,” she speaks quickly over the tangential topic. “Anyways, he was just there. Ever since then, I just keep running into him.”

“What about the night at the bar? And what the fuck do you mean ‘magical Junimo thing?’”

“I have no idea why he did that. I barely even remember it.” She wishes she knew. “And don’t worry about the Junimos. I’m the only one who can see them. And I guess the wizard. It’s nothing really.”

“There’s more of them? And there’s a fucking wizard?” His jaw drops. “Maybe you are crazy.”

“I told you!” She cries.

“Any other weird shit I should know about?”

“Oh, most definitely.” She nods enthusiastically. “I’m an interdimensional traveler from another world. I got stuck here and am exploring the caves in an attempt to find my way home.”

“Hell, you might be,” he laughs. 

They continue walking slowly up the path. Enny enjoys the peaceful life of the mountain. It’s different from the development of the town. She feels more at peace up here among the chirps and chitters of the life around her. 

“He’s been weird lately,” Shane breaks the silence between them.

“What does that mean?”

“He’s been angry and I don’t see him on Friday’s with Abby and Sam.”

“He’s probably just upset about Abby.”

“I don’t think that’s it.”

“Why not?”

“I talked to him in the woods a few weeks ago, when you were still in the clinic.”

“Okay,” she draws out the word. “What did you talk about?”

“You.”

“Why me?”

“Well,” he hesitates. “It was awkward. It was in Cindersnap forest. I was wandering around a little lost—”

“And a little drunk?” 

“Yeah, a little drunk,” he laughs lightly. “I heard him and Abby fight, and well, break up.”

“Shit, that had to be really weird.”

“Oh yeah.” He nods. 

“So, you know why they broke up?” He nods again, but sheepishly. 

“It sounded like it was because of you.” A knot forms in her stomach.

“How could it be because of me?”

“Things were weird for them after that night at the bar. He took you home and just left her.”

“Shit. I’d be pretty pissed about that too.”

“Yeah, then there’s the whole mining thing. She flipped out about what you said.”

“I wasn—”

“Yeah yeah, I know. You weren’t talking about him. Well, she thinks you were, and she thinks he’s lying about something going on between you two.”

Enny feels guilt build up in her chest. She didn’t know they broke up because of her. What’s worse, she feels a sense of relief. Why am I happy about them breaking up? What’s fucking wrong with me?

“Then why is he so mad? Why didn’t he just tell her what I told him?”

“Well….”

“Well what?”

“Look, I was happy to just be a creeper in the shadows, but then he started to have a panic attack. So, against my better judgment, I went out to talk to him. Which I blame you for.”

“I’ll take that blame,” she chuckles, feeling a warm smile form on her face.

“Anyways, he talked to me a little about it. He asked if I thought you were talking about him.”

“What did you say?”

“That I didn’t know. Just that you hadn’t ever really talked about him, but see, that seemed to upset him.”

“Really? Why?”

“Come on, Enny. Are you really that dense?”

“What does that mea—” realization dawns on her. “ Oh .”

“Yeah, oh . So, I asked him if he wanted you to be talking about him.”

She’s too stunned to ask how he answered. Do I really want to know? A long silence passes, as if Shane waits for her to make the decision to ask.

“Tell me,” she whispers.

“He said yes, but he didn’t know why.”

Enny’s feet stop at the sudden weight of his words and her chest tightens as she feels dread build within it. Her throat hurts under the grip of reality and she struggles to breathe. I just want to go home. I don’t want to be here, feeling anything for anyone else. I just want to go home. She feels like she’s betraying her family by feeling anything for the Sebastian here.

The cabin is just at the edge of the forest, but she can’t bring herself to move forward.

“Do you mind if we go see Marlon first? I think I need a little time before going to Robin’s.”

“We can go wherever you want.”

“Thanks Shane.” The weight lightens slightly and she is able to resume walking, turning towards the bridge leading to the mines. As they pass the entrance, Enny’s heartbeat becomes erratic and fast. Her chest tightens once again and she thinks back to that night.

Shane’s voice momentarily breaks the fear growing inside of her.

“There’s something else.”

“Oh Yoba, what now?” She chuckles in an attempt to hide the anxiety crushing her body.

“I also overheard Sam and Sebastian after that night at the bar.”

“You really are just a big old creeper, aren’t you? Do you make it a habit of spying on the town?” Her voice quivers and shakes.

“It’s not my fault people don’t look around before arguing.”

“They were arguing?”

“I’m not sure. All I heard was they were dreaming about someone. Then, because I’m not a creeper, I walked the long way around them.”

“Why is that weird?”

“I think they were talking about you.”

Could they be dreaming like I am? But why?

“What makes you think it was about me?”

“They said something about a new girl in town. But it wasn’t just them. Other people talked about you too.”

“Alright, I’m going to turn you into Lewis. You have a serious problem,” she laughs awkwardly. “Do you dream about me too?” She winks, trying to hide the panic filling her chest.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he deadpans. 

“I’m a pretty notable person. I’ve been told I leave quite impression,” she chuckles but wonders if it means something. She’ll have to find time to sneak down to the wizard’s tower to ask.

“How do you fit in that tiny cabin with such a huge ego?” He snorts as the Adventurer’s Guild finally comes into view. “So, this is the Adventurer’s Guild?” 

“Yep, and I’m an exclusive member.”

“It can’t be that exclusive if they let you in.”

“Jealousy doesn’t look good on you Bird Flu,” she quips. “And it’s exclusive enough that they won’t let you in.” 

“Wait, seriously?” His face drops.

“Yep! You have to wait out here.”

Before he can answer, she slips inside and lets the door slam behind her . 

Immediately, her eyes are drawn in by the walls lined with various weapons from daggers and swords to slingshots and some more unusual ones. Each glistens in the light shining in through the window, lighting up the room. 

“Enny!” Marlon greets her from behind the counter. “You’re here. Does that mean you’re feeling better?” He wears a warm, almost fatherly, smile.

“A lot better actually.” She returns the smile. “But I’m still on escort only.” She rolls her eyes toward the door.

“That’s probably best. You were pretty beat up in the mines.”

“Yeah.” She looks down, embarrassed. “About that. They told me you pulled me out of the cave and got hurt.” She grabs her arm nervously. “I’m really sorry. I never meant for something like that to happen.”

“No apologies necessary.” He waves her off. “It was just some mild burns. It wasn’t serious,” he reassures her. “Besides, I didn’t actually pull you out. That was Robin and Linus.”

“I’m still really sorry.” She finally looks up. “Thank you, for saving me.”

“I will always be here to help. Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“We’ve trained together. I’ve seen your work down in the mines. When I went down there, I suspected you had been swarmed by a herd. I don’t mean to sound critical, but I was surprised to see you didn’t seem to injure a single creature. Did something else happen while you were down there?”

“Uh, well, kind of, but I don’t know how to explain it. It sounds stupid.”

“Try me.” 

He walks out from behind the counter and leads her to the couch. They both sit and Enny hates how much her body needs it. She takes a breath, holds it, then exhales deeply.

“Well, I jumped down there,” she feels her chest tighten. “The first thing I saw were the walls. I knew it was an infested level. Then, these two slimes slowly rolled over to me. I tried to move, but…,” she trails off.

“You were frozen in place?” He finishes for her.

“Yeah, that’s exactly what happened,” her voice shakes. “How do you know that?”

“Please, sit down,” he motions her to the chair by the end of the counter. “Tell me, what were you thinking about when it happened?”

“I wasn’t really thinking about anything,” she lies. She knows exactly what she was thinking about. It’s what she’s thought about every day since coming here. 

“Enny,” his low voice thick with compassion and skeptical look tells her he knows she’s lying.

“It’s just,” she starts slowly. “I thought about some other times down there.” She averts her gaze, trying to focus on anything but the man in front of her.

“You were trapped in the memory,” he says as a confirmation instead of a question, sending a fresh wave of tears to her eyes. “It’s normal for people who go down there, especially after traumatic experiences,” he pauses before continuing. “And dying is probably as traumatic as it gets.” What? She stares at him in disbelief. “Rasmodius told me what happened.”

“He…” her voice dies, unable to comprehend his words or her thoughts.

“He came by and asked me what I knew about some sword in the desert.”

“What, what did he say?” She barely gets the words out.

“He told me who you are.”

“You mean who I’m not,” her voice is laced with anger. Not at him. Not at the wizard. But at herself.

“It doesn’t matter to me who you are or where you came from.” She stays quiet, feeling the rage quickly boil through her body. He places his hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry for what’s happening to you.”

“Why aren’t you angry?” She seethes. “I’m not who you believed I was. I’ve taken the life of the girl you knew. I’m nothing but a fraud, who lied to you about knowing your wife.”

The words sit in the air uncomfortably, but she can’t take them back.

“It sounds like you did know her,” his voice is quiet. “I know it wouldn’t have mattered to her.”

She looks into his face and sees a tear streaming down his cheek. 

“Tell me,” his voice weak. “Is she, I mean, in your world, is she…”

“I’m sorry.” She looks down at her feet, ashamed.

“I see,” his voice sounds hurt. “Did she die the same way?”

“Yeah,” she whispers.

“We need to get you home.” She looks up at him in surprise. “If the other me is anything like me, he’s going to tear down that mountain to get you back.” She chuckles, knowing he’s right. 

“You would really help me?”

“Of course. It doesn’t matter where you’re from, I still care about you.”

“I don’t deserve you. This you or the other one.”

“I could say the same thing. You brought a burst of life back to me when you moved here.”

Chapter Text

Sebastian leans against the cool rock at the entrance to the mines. He’s always been curious about what’s in there and that curiosity has only grown since the new farmer started exploring it. He desperately wants to smoke, but he’s waiting for her to come back up. 

Enny’s been avoiding him since the night with the honey. He tried to talk to her when she was in his mom’s workshop, but she took off the moment she saw him. She didn’t even finish giving Robin her order.

Maybe he went too far that night. Maybe he didn’t go far enough. He plans to get his answers tonight. So, he waits as the full moon climbs high in the sky and the crickets become silent. He watches the ripples gently roll over the lake in the light breeze. 

Suddenly, a shrill voice screams from inside the mines. Rushing in, he sees Enny fall backwards out of the elevator. She quickly jumps up and kicks a rock. It grows legs and scurries down a nearby ladder.

“Yeah, that’s right!” She shouts. “You better run, you little fucker.”

“Picking fights with rocks?” Sebastian chuckles. Yoba, she's so cute .

Enny jumps at his voice.

“Holy fucking shit Sebastian! What the fuck are you doing here? You scared the shit out of me.”

“I’m just enjoying the show,” he laughs while taking a few steps toward her.

“Oh yeah? Do you like what you see?” She chuckles while dusting off her pants.

“I do actually.” She meets his gaze and his voice drops low. “I very much like what I see.”

“I, uh um,” she stammers. “Wh-what are you doing here?” She stands there staring at anything other than him.

“I was waiting for you.”

“W-why?” She squeaks.

“Well, you’ve been avoiding me.” He steps toward her.

“S-so, you figured you would ambush me?” Her tone has a slight edge. “Do you always disregard other people’s boundaries like that?” He loves her attitude and finds himself taking another step.

“Only when I don’t think that’s what they really want.” She backs up, matching his pace.

“Oh please, do tell me Sebastian, what is it that I want?” She snorts.

“I think,” he pauses as she steps back into the cave wall. He closes the distance, reaching out his hand to gently grab the side of her face. “You really want,” he pauses again as he slides his hand down the side of her neck towards her shoulder, “to give me a gift.” He flashes a devilish smile as he pulls her bag off.

“You fucking asshole!” She shoves him away. “THIS is why I’m avoiding you.” His laughter fills the cave, only fueling her apparent frustration. “Are you always this much of a perv?” She snatches her bag from his hand and walks towards the entrance of the mines. 

“Only when it’s consensual,” he chuckles and walks out behind her.

They walk down the path together towards the bridge. Once they cross it, Enny jumps off the path and steps through the tree line into the forest. Sebastian quickly follows her as she sets her bag down. She kneels and starts digging through it. 

“What are you doing?” 

He cocks his head to the side trying to see what she’s looking for. Enny ignores him and keeps rummaging in her pack. Finally, she turns toward him holding something small. She reaches it out to him while looking down. 

The light of the full moon shines into her hand and his eyes widen at the luster of  a chiseled, glass like stone. It breaks apart the light around them into disjointed shapes that dance through the trees. He follows the bouncing lights around until he sees she’s staring at him. 

“What?” She says, looking embarrassed.

“It’s a quartz.” He lets a devious smile spread across his face. “You really did want to give me another gift.” 

He reaches out but instead of grabbing the quartz, he lightly touches her wrist. He holds it for a moment before gently grabbing it and bringing it to his face. He leans toward it and lets his lips brush against her soft skin. He lets them travel up her arm, leaving light kisses as he goes, never breaking eye contact.

He follows it all the way up until he reaches her collarbone. 

“Tell me to stop,” a primal edge laces his sultry voice.

Enny says nothing.

“Tell me to keep going.”

She remains silent but uses her free hand to grab his other arm. His eyes follow her movements as she leads his hand up towards her face. She stops it just under her chin and rests it over her neck. 

“Keep going.”

At those words, his hand lightly tightens around her throat. She moans and leans her head back. He effortlessly spins her around so he’s behind her, while keeping his grip on her neck. She drops the quartz as he braces her up against a tree. He pulls his hand further up until he feels the edges of her jaw.

Her neck is so small, so delicate, but she gives him this power. He clutches her hip with his other hand and pulls her into him. Sebastian lets his hand slide further down to her inner thigh. He grips tightly causing her to let out a small gasp. He loosens his grip and pulls his hand up with a slight pressure until it’s resting just under the seam of her shorts. He feels the warmth radiating through the soft fabric as he slowly slides his hand over it. 

“Sebastian,” she rasps.

He exhales into her hair. He loves how his name sounds on her lips.

“Say my name again,” he demands, while reaching down between her legs.

“Sebastian,” she whispers.

He releases her only to move his fingertips up to the top of her shorts tracing its edges, while he waits for her invitation.

She grabs his hand and slides it deep into her pants until he feels her wet lips. He thrusts and pulls her into him at the sudden contact. He slowly slides a finger into her and feels her moan in his hand. He slides in another, and she grinds into him. 

“You’re so wet,” his voice rasps. “Is this all for me?”

He pulls out his wet fingers and slides them up her clit. She grinds into him harder, and he feels her breath quicken. He rubs deep circles into her, as he listens to her breath become shallow and frantic.

“I want you to scream my name.”

“Sebastian,” she breathes out.

He squeezes her neck tightly as her moans die under his hand. He rubs faster and harder until he feels her begin to pulse under him.

“Sebastian,” she whispers.

“Louder.”

“Sebastian,” she raises her voice slightly.

“Louder,” his soft voice demands.

“Sebastian,” she squeaks out under his grip.

“Scream it. I want to feel my name trapped in your throat.”

He slides his finger into her then back up, until his hand is drenched in her. She grinds faster into his hand, and he feels her throat vibrate under his grip. She sounds out of breath, but she encourages him to grab her tighter. 

Then she screams for him. His name is stifled under his hand, but he feels it tear its way through to her lips. He will give her anything she wants to make her scream like this. He rides her through her high, pulling her back into him, giving deep slow pressure to where she guides his hand. 

It’s only when she lets her hands fall to her side that he releases her neck. Then, he slowly slides his finger into her one last time, letting out a hum of pleasure at how much she’s dripping because of him. He gently pulls his hand out and up to his mouth. He slips his finger in to taste her. It sends waves of heat through his body as he licks every bit of her off his finger.

“This tastes much better than honey.”

“Yeah,” she gives a low chuckle. “I won’t get you anymore honey.”

Enny turns around to look up at him with flushed cheeks visible in the pale moonlight. He slowly leans down past her and picks up the quartz from the ground.

“I like this.”

“Only like?” She groans.

“Mhm.” He smirks. “Next time bring me something I love.”

“It would be easier if you told me what you loved.”

“It’s not supposed to be easy,” he leans in and whispers in her ear. “That’s how I know you really want it.”

Sebastian groans as he wakes up. I hate these fucking dreams. His dreams about her have become more frequent and sexual. It’s bad enough that Abby broke up with him because of her, but he doesn’t even mean anything to Enny.

He rolls over and screams into his pillow. He was stupid to think there was any connection between them. The whole time, she was thinking about some other guy. He means nothing to her. Now, Abby hates him, and he hates himself. 

Abby ignores his calls and texts, but it’s probably best. He doesn’t know what to say. ‘Sorry Abs, nothing happened with the farmer, but I definitely wanted something to, but also she’s not interested.’ I’m pathetic.

He’s pining after someone he barely knows. Logically, he knows this is crazy. He doesn’t want to feel this way about her. Emotionally, he’s a mess. He can’t stop thinking about her. He thinks about her having that panic attack in the bar, he thinks about her holding him by the lake, he thinks about fucking her in the forest. I’m SO FUCKING pathetic . He needs to get out of the house. He grabs his phone and sends Sam a text.

Sebastian : Hey Sam. Want to practice?

He responds almost immediately.

Sam : Hell yeah! 

Sam : Give me like an hour. Then come over!

Sam : Bring pizza!

Sebastian : Alright lol I will

Sam : Sweeeeeeeeeet

Sebastian : See you soon

Sebastian doesn’t deserve his friendship. He knows it’s been hard for Sam. He’s friends with Abby too. Sebastian doesn’t want to put him in an awkward position. For some reason, Sam believes him about Enny. He didn’t exactly tell him about his feelings for her, but he’s pretty sure he figured it out.

Still, Sam never makes him feel shitty about it. He just listens when he wants to talk about it and is there when he needs to get out. Sebastian knows he still hangs out with Abby, which is good, but it stings a little. He assumes she talks to him about it too. He just wants her to talk to him.

He loves Abby, but not just in a romantic way. The three of them have been best friends their whole lives. Losing her feels like he’s lost part of himself. You don’t deserve her. You don’t deserve anyone. That familiar voice echoes in his head. 

He quickly goes upstairs to grab some coffee. Demetrius isn’t in his lab, so Sebastian relaxes slightly. He pours a cup to go in case he comes back soon. He’d rather be out of the house before then. Sebastian passes his mom in the shop, waving on his way out.

The heaviness in his eyelids tell him he’s still pretty tired, no doubt from his restless nights in dreamland and the subsequent harshness of his reality upon waking. He just needs to distract himself until he can meet Sam. Going to town seems dangerous given how often he’s seen Enny walking around, so he opts for the lake instead.  

Sebastian quickly finds his familiar spot on the bank and looks out over the water. He can hear the sounds of life in the forest around him and he hates it. The skittering of squirrels and chirps of birds grate his ears. He’s angry and the tranquility of the world conflicts with his inner turmoil.

Sebastian digs his pack of cigarettes from his pocket, feeling relief from the familiarity of the box. He quickly lights one and takes a long drag, while squeezing his eyes shut hard. He’s frustrated and it all comes back to Enny. He just wants to forget her and get his life back. What life? You’re miserable and will die unhappy, probably sooner rather than later. He hates that voice, but deep down, he knows it’s right.

Before he can spiral any further, he hears voices coming from the other side of the lake. He opens his eyes and looks out to see Enny and Shane walking from the Adventurer’s Guild. Why can’t I get away from her?

They’re laughing and it stokes the flame inside him. She can be friends with whoever she wants. Still, he thinks of her walking out of the cave with him instead. He looks over to the edge of the forest where the Enny in his dreams gave him the quartz.

He steps back to just inside the tree line, so he isn’t seen. He watches them walk across the bridge and he hears her sniffle. 

“You sure cry a lot for this badass farmer from the city who slays monsters alone deep inside a cave,” Shane scoffs and Sebastian feels a pang of hurt rush through his chest.

“You sure are nice for someone who pretends to be a grumpy old man,” she retorts.

“Hey! I’m not old, or nice.”

“Maybe not old, but definitely nice.”

“Ugh, I’m not going to help you anymore if you keep saying shit like that,” he grumbles.

“Then stop being so nice,” she laughs. I love her laugh. Why is it him causing it? What am I even thinking?

Once they’re out of hearing distance, he steps back out toward the lake. He needs this to stop. He feels like he’s losing control over himself. Half of him wants to rush out and pull her into his chest. The other half wants to cut out the part of himself yearning for her. He brings the cigarette back to his lips, sucking in the harsh smoke, letting it assault his senses. He focuses on the burn crawling down his throat and into his chest. It spreads outward in a tingling sensation, sending tiny sparks across his skin. Slowly, his mind calms and the anger dies down to a dull throbbing.

Sebastian looks at his phone and thinks he can head to Sam’s. He’ll still be a little early, but he needs to get away from his thoughts and this damn forest from his dreams. He pockets his butt and makes his way back to the path by his house. 

The front door opens, just as he’s passing by. Enny barrels through it, crashing into Sebastian. Fuck me.

Enny finishes paying for her barn at Robin’s and quickly rushes out the door. But of course, it’s never that easy for her. Barely out of the cabin, Enny slams into a familiar person’s chest. She stumbles at the sudden force, but the brooding man in front of her grabs her before she falls.

For a moment, Enny looks up at him and sees that warmth come back to his face, but it disappears quickly as his face morphs into something more bitter. He practically shoves her back as he lets her go, like she is some disgusting thing.

“What the hell Enny?” Shane says as he runs into her. “Did you forget how to walk?” She doesn’t look at him, her eyes glued to Sebastian. Shane follows her gaze and sighs. “Great.”

“Move,” he says coldly as he tries to walk past her.

“I-I’m sorry,” she stammers.

His head whips around and he gives her a look of disgust before he walks past her and Shane. She stares at his back as he walks down the path until Shane breaks her out of her trance.

“Come on, Enny. Let’s go.” 

“Yeah, okay.” Her feet reluctantly move her towards the other path leading home.

Enny and Shane walk slowly back to the farm in an uncomfortable silence. Eventually, Shane breaks the quiet.

“Look, I don’t need you saying I’m nice or anything, but are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course.” She pulls her lips into a forced smile.

“You don’t have to lie to me like that.”

“Ugh,” she groans “Why did you have to become such a kind, caring friend.”

“Trust me. I don’t want to. I’m happy to go back to my ‘grumpy young man’ life,” he laughs weakly. “But I’m worried about you. You came out of the Guild crying and then shut down after seeing gloom and doom.”

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s a stupid thing to be sorry for,” his voice more compassionate than critical.

“Yeah, you’re right,” she pauses. “If it helps, it was a good cry with Marlon.”

“How does someone ‘good cry?’” His face morphs into confusion. “What about with Sebastian? Why let him talk to you like that?” He asks seriously.

“I don’t know. Maybe some weird feeling of guilt. It’s my fault he’s like that right?”

Shane stops Enny and turns toward her.

“That is not your fault, and you have nothing to feel guilty about.” 

He means well, but Enny knows the truth. She doesn’t belong here and it’s causing problems. She’s causing problems.

“Yeah, okay.” They resume walking. 

“You don’t deserve that, and I know for a fact you’re too much of a stubborn badass to put up with that shit. Whatever you think you owe him, you don’t.”

“Thanks Shane.”

“Whatever,” he responds disinterestedly. 

“Do you remember when we first met?” She asks.

“You mean, when you chased a little girl through the woods like a fucking psychopath?” He shoots her a judgmental look. “It’s hard to forget.”

“Hey! I told you,” she yells defensively. “It wasn’t like that. I was just worried about her.”

“And I mostly believe that now,” a small laugh escapes his serious demeanor. “I wanted to beat your ass then though.”

“You would hit a girl?” She feigns shock.

“I don’t see any girls around here.” His eyes dart back and forth. “An asshole, but no girls.” A smile breaks out across his face.

“You really care about her, don’t you?”

“I do.” He nods. “People love to brag about how they would die for someone they love, but not me.”

“Oh, so you don’t love her then,” Enny teases.

“No, I do. So much so that I would murder for her,” he draws out the word murder. “Dying is easy.”

“Shit, Shane. That’s intense,” she shutters. “Remind me never to get on your bad side.”

Chapter Text

Enny wakes up anxious and excited. Today is the day of the luau. She has been trying to find the perfect ingredient all week to add to the communal soup. It sounds pretty gross, but it feels like it’s more than just about food. It’s some sort of metaphor for the people of this town coming together. She wants to pick the perfect ingredient that represents her.

She is making more friends and has become close to a few people. She often finds herself talking to Linus in the mountains or training with Marlon. She has been hanging out with Sam and Abby, which of course, also means Sebastian. 

She struggles to be a normal functioning human being around him. He makes her feel crazy, especially after that night in the forest. Whenever they’re around other people, they act like nothing is going on. But when it’s just the two of them, there is relentless flirting and teasing. 

Sebastian always pushes his limits, but he won’t cross them without Enny making the final move. Aside from the honey and quartz incidents, she’s been able to keep her horny ass in check. Still, she can’t stop thinking about how his hand felt around her neck while she came into the other. 

She notices how he tries to find any excuse he can to lick his fingers when they’re out in public. He’s teasing her, and he knows she likes it. She wants to know what other things he would do to her. She debates not giving him any more gifts, but knows that’s not what she really wants. She really wants to feel him fuck her, to absolutely wreck her. And she wants to earn it. 

Enny wakes up to that familiar pound in her head, but new aches in her body. Her legs throb and her entire stomach feels like she took a beating. She sits up and her body screams in retaliation.

“Fuck me,” she groans. I guess I should have listened to Harvey . She slowly and painfully pulls herself out of bed and over to the bathroom. She digs around until she finds some over the counter, sad excuse for a painkiller.

She takes the pills and turns on the bathtub. She hopes a soak in warm water will help her sore muscles. She goes to the kitchen to make some coffee while she waits for it to fill up. I guess that hike up the mountain was a little too much.

She finishes her coffee and heads to the warm bath waiting for her. She carefully slides her battered body into the water and lets the heat penetrate her muscles. The bath soothes most of her aches, leaving only a dull throb in her stomach. She’s going to have a hard time keeping it from Leah and Harvey, but if they know, they’ll keep her in today. She needs to go see Rasmodius and tell him about the potentially weird dreams. She also wants to ask him if he’s told anyone else about who she is.

She grabs her phone and has a missed call from Harvey. She listens to the voicemail and is happy to hear he’s out sick again today. Not that she’s happy he’s sick, but that she won’t have to go into town for an appointment. Enny concedes it might be better to rest most of the day, but she decides to visit the wizard first. 

Enny dries off and gets dressed before heading out to her porch. She expects to see Leah, but instead finds a nice quiet drizzle and a grumpy Shane walking up.

“You again?” She exclaims.

“Unfortunately, yes,” he mumbles.

“Well, there isn’t much to do. The crops are watered from the rain and there’s nothing to harvest. The chickens still have food and water from yesterday,” she smiles. “You’re free for the day.”

“Thank Yoba,” he dramatically sighs in relief. 

“Leah still working on her project?”

“Not sure. She showed up looking upset this morning.”

“Is she okay?” Enny asks worriedly.

“Don’t know. Too tired to ask. I just groaned and nodded when she asked me to come over again.”

“Damn, I hope everything’s okay.” Enny pulls out her phone to text her.

“She might just need some space,” he suggests. “Anyways, you ready to go to Harvey’s? I’ll walk you there on my way to work.

“Nope!” She beams. “He’s still sick, so I’m a free bird once again. No cage can contain me!” She fist pumps the sky.

“Easy killer. How are you feeling after yesterday?”

“Eh, a little sore, but nothing too bad.”

“You should take it easy. Keep your walks to the town or whatever.” She gives him a grin. “What’s with the look?” He scowls lightly.

“You’re sweet. That’s all.” She turns away and grabs a jacket from inside the doorway. “But! I already planned to. I’m just going for a short walk around the farm, then planting myself here to read for the rest of the day.”

“Fucking nerd,” he snorts.

“You’re just uncultured!” She lifts her nose up in the air to look down at him.

“And what great literature are you reading?”

“That’s not important!”

“Oh, I see. Something trashy,” he chuckles.

“What! No! It’s a comic. Don’t be weird,” she defends.

“That sounds pretty trashy.” 

“Whatever.” She waves him off, dismissively. “Have fun at work.”

“Oh yeah, it’ll be a blast.” He waves as he walks off towards town.

Once he’s out of sight, she makes her way down the southern path out of her farm. She makes the turn at Marnie’s and through the woods. It’s a harder walk today than yesterday and the wet ground doesn’t help. She walks much slower and holds on to branches for support. 

Finally, the tower comes into view. She walks painfully up the stairs and nearly falls over from the pain. Fucking stairs. Once up, she opens the door and finds the wizard hovering over his comical cauldron brimming with fog.

“I left a towel and a mat by the door for you. Try not to track mud in here,” he calls to her.

“So, you knew I was coming?” She proceeds to dry herself off and leaves her muddy boots at the door. 

“Yes, I can see glimpses of your future, however they are not as clear nor consistent as others’.”

“Do you think it’s because I don’t belong here.” 

“Perhaps.” He nods. “Have you learned anything new?”

“Sort of,” she starts as she walks over and sits on the stool near the counter. “I’ve looked up some stuff about me, or the other me. I know she lived in the same apartment with the same roommates. She, um, well she also had a brother who died.” She looks absently at the wall. “And I found a picture in an article from when I was a kid that’s the same.”

“Your brother,” he starts, while lifting his gaze to meet her. “What was the nature of his death?”

“It was the same if that’s what you mean.” She hopes that’s what he means.

“Partly, but I also need to know how he died.” She hesitates for too long. “I know this is difficult for you, but these questions are necessary.”

“Okay,” she sighs. “He, um, he died in a car accident.” She pauses and takes a deep breath. “He, uh, was picking me up from work. The driver was drunk and ran a red light. Hit my brother’s side.” She stops again to breathe, feeling her lips tug down. “It was the same date and everything.”

“Interesting,” he rubs his beard before continuing. “It seems odd that a death like that would occur the same way in both worlds. That manner of death is more susceptible to chance.”

“Yeah, I kind of thought the same thing.”

“What about the rest of your family?”

“Oh,” her breath quickens as a cold sweat trickles down her spine. “I, um, didn’t actually check. I don’t really remember my dad much and well…” she trails off.

“I remember your father.” He smiles, clearly sensing her discomfort. “He broke into my tower once,” he gives a low chuckle.

“Wait, really?” Enny looks skeptical. 

“Yes.” He nods. “He was younger than you are now.” A sinister grin cuts through his beard. “I made sure he never returned.”

“What did you do?”

“I merely gave him a little fright. You know I supply most of the Spirit’s Eve materials.” He winks.

“It was the spiders, wasn’t it?” Enny raises an eyebrow.

“Yes, indeed it was.” He grins and Enny chuckles.

“I can believe that.” She smiles at one of the few memories she has of him. “He hated spiders. He would leave the house if he saw one.”

“Was there anything else you learned?”

“Maybe, I’m not sure it’s anything though.”

“Go on,” he urges.

“Well, Leah said this Enny used to write to her grandpa before he died, but I didn’t. I hadn’t talked to or seen him in years.” She feels that familiar pang of guilt stab at her chest.

“What else was different between the two of you?” 

“Honestly, I don’t know.” She sits on a stool, exasperated.  “Oh.” She perks up. “The weather’s different and my farm was hit by a meteor.”

“Hmm, that is quite interesting.” He strokes his chin in contemplation. “What else?”

“Well, I heard from Shane that other people have been dreaming about me.”

“Are they like yours?”

“I don’t know.” She shakes her head. “But I guess it’s happening to a few people.”

“Most interesting.” He reaches for his beard again. “Do you know what they are about?”

“No, sorry. What I know is pretty weak.” She pauses a moment. “Do you dream about me?” 

“No, I have not.”

“Okay.” She deflates. “Shane doesn’t either.”

“How different have you found the townspeople to be?” The question surprises Enny.

“Oh, well, some are the same and others are really different.” She thinks of Shane.

“Can you elaborate?”

“I’ll try,” she starts. “I haven’t spent much time with people I knew the best before, but I have gotten to know others like Leah and Shane.”

“You weren’t close with them there?”

“Not really. I mean over the years I became friendly with Leah, but she was pretty guarded. Here she’s more open with me. She also had a closer relationship with my grandpa than she did in my world.”

“And what of Shane?”

“Oh, well, I didn’t really know him.” She grabs the end of her braid. “He, um, died. It was a few weeks after I moved here.”

“I see.”

“And then, there’s Sebastian,” she voice quivers slightly. She stands to look away from the wizard’s prying eyes. “He was dating Abby here but never did where I’m from. He’s also been weird around me and one of the people Shane thinks has been dreaming about me.”

“Weird how?”

“I think, he um, he might be interested in me…” she pauses, absently fiddling with an empty bottle on a shelf. “Romantically.”

“And he wasn’t before?”

“No, he definitely was.” Heat rushes to her cheeks in a guilty embarrassment. ”But it was different. He was different. He’s so angry and broken here. He struggled a lot, sure, but it wasn’t like this.”

“You two were close?” Her face burns.

“Yeah, very close.” Enny shifts her weight to one foot nervously. “Wait, I almost forgot. Why did you tell Marlon?”

“Oh yes. I asked him what he knew of the sword, but it was not much. I apologize, I should have alerted you when I revealed your identity.”

“It’s okay. I was a little surprised, but it felt good to talk to someone else who knew.”

“That is understandable. In the future, I will tell you if I think it necessary to speak of your origins.”

“Thanks.” She lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding in. 

“As for your injuries. I heard they were quite severe.” He turns and walks toward the same shelf, sifting through the various shapes and colors of liquid bottles. He grabs a small, dark red one with a thick looking liquid in it. “I have something that might help.” He hands her the bottle.

“I don’t know if I want this.” She gives him a very skeptical look. “I’ve had your potions before. Frankly, I’m surprised I survived.” 

“This one will aid the healing process. It should speed up your recovery time.”

She quickly plucks the bottle from his hand as all hesitation fades. She removes the cap and drinks the whole bottle, ignoring the moldy taste and grainy texture.

“Yoba, that’s awful.” She gasps out after finishing the bottle.

“Awful, but effective.” 

At those words, she feels a surge of warmth spread through her. It carries an energy that ignites her muscles, making her feel lighter.

“I see that.”

“You will still need to take it slow, but I expect it to work quite quickly.”

“Thank you, Ras. This means a lot.”

“Of course.”

Enny leaves shortly after that, feeling rejuvenated. The dull ache in her stomach is gone and her muscles beg to be used. She decides to appease them by taking a long walk through the forest. The drizzle lights up her skin, sending a fresh wave of goosebumps down her arms.

Leah walks through the gray forest but hears no sounds. She feels the rain pouring down on her and sees the drops hit the lake, but all is silent. She sees a faceless figure sitting on the pier over the lake, head turned down towards the water. They look like they are going to slip in.

Leah calls out, but finds she has no voice. She tries to scream, but no sound escapes her lips. Her chest heaves and she runs over to them. As she sprints down the pier, she finds it’s longer than it should be. Every step takes her further away. 

She stops running and sees the lake and forest have disappeared. All that remains is the end of the pier surrounded by black. The person has been replaced by twisted branches and brambles. They reach out towards Leah, and she feels panicked. 

Leah tries to run, but they wrap around her legs, knocking her down. She claws at the dock while it drags her to the darkness that awaits her. The last thing she sees is the edge of the pier above her shrink until all that’s left is the void around her.

Leah wakes up screaming, covered in a cold sweat.

“Leah! Leah!” Someone shouts. “Leah, it’s just a dream. I’m right here.”

“Em-Emily?” Leah manages to get out. “Where am I?”

“You’re in your cabin. You just had a nightmare.”

“Oh, my cabin.” She looks around at the dimly lit room and she’s familiar objects. She sees the tree outside her window, the wood walls, and then her eyes fixate on the wooden sculpture in the middle of the room.

“Leah, come back to me.” Emily soothes, while rubbing her back.

“I, I’m here.” She whispers as her eyes fill with tears.

“Was it the sculpture again?” 

Leah can’t answer and simply nods. Emily sighs and walks over to the wood sculpture. She grabs a nearby tarp and throws it over the piece to cover it. As if the trance has been broken, Leah rubs her face and gets up from bed.

“How long was I sleeping?”

“Just a couple of hours.” Emily grabs her own arms and looks away. “I’m worried about you.” She brings her head back enough to meet Leah’s gaze.

“I know,” she says meekly.

“This piece is killing you.”

“I know.” Leah looks at the floor.

“The nightmares have been getting worse. You’re barely getting any sleep. You haven’t been eating.”

“I know.”

“You’re becoming obsessed.”

Leah knows. It happens sometimes with her art, but nightmares are rare. She hasn’t had them since Kel. Right after she moved here, she experienced something similar. Her own pain and hurt manifested itself through her art. She had nightmares and slept little. She found comfort in Emily as a friend, but they didn’t end until the work was finished.

“I think I’m close.” She looks at the tarp covering the twisted wood. 

“I hope so.” 

Emily walks over and puts her arms around Leah. Leah buries her face into Emily and cries. Emily kisses the top of her head and just holds her.

“I’m here for you. Whatever you need.”

“I need to finish it.”

“Okay, I understand.” Both women know that Leah needs to work alone. Emily grabs her stuff before turning back to Leah. “Is it okay if I come back after work?”

“Of course.” Leah gives her a thankful smile. “It helps.”

Emily walks over to Leah to give her another hug.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They share a kiss before Emily walks out the door into the rain.

She feels the pull of the rain. I might find what I’m looking for . She gets dressed and grabs her bag. She pulls off the tarp and looks deeply at her sculpture. She knows this isn’t like the piece after Kel. This art doesn’t come from her. It comes from something else. Something tragic, full of pain and anguish. Someone .

Leah takes one last look at the dark crevices of the wood and heads to the door. She steps out to meet the drizzle in the early morning light. She needs to stop at Shane’s before setting out. He has changed dramatically since Enny moved in. It makes her happy to see this authentic side of Shane. She thinks of him as a friend.

She feels bad about waking him up and sending him over to Enny’s again. Still, he does it without needing to be convinced. He cares for Enny, and it warms Leah’s heart to see it. He has such a soft side to him that Enny brought to the surface. Leah is grateful to experience it.

She leaves Shane’s and heads to the lake. What she’s looking for might be here. It would be great if she knew what she was looking for, but that’s not how this work has been. Each piece of driftwood she finds, each dead and broken branch, all have appeared and begged to be used. 

She has had art jump out before, but usually it’s only been in the initial phase of development, not the entire process. She cannot see the end. All she can do is trust the path she’s on. Still, it’s frustrating not knowing where it’s going, or how much she has left. How will I even know when it’s done?

She pushes the doubts away and continues her walk to the water. The rain blankets the forest and mutes the sounds around her. When the lake comes into view, she almost expects to see someone on the pier. Leah feels a pang of disappointment when she finds it’s empty. She feels out of step with whatever, or whoever, she is looking for.

She decides to walk around the bank of the large lake, hoping to find something that has drifted onto the shore. She carefully inspects every wooden piece she finds, but they all feel wrong in her hands. Feelings of frustration and desperation claw at Leah’s chest. It’s a nagging sensation that demands its freedom.

Leah walks, ever searching, until she finds herself back at the dock. Except this time, it’s not empty. At the edge of the dock, she sees a pair of legs hanging over the edge, attached to someone laying on their back. She tentatively walks out to the pier, fearful of what she might find.

The beast inside her surges with hunger and pushes her forward, almost against her will. It takes her to the end of the pier, to come face to face with the omen from her dream.

“Enny?”

Enny’s eyes fly open to meet Leah’s. A smile spreads across her face as she sits up.

“Leah!” She beams. “What are you doing out here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. In fact, I am. You’re supposed to be at Harvey’s.”

“He’s out sick again.”

“So, you came out to the woods alone?” Leah’s voice turns from worry to exasperation.

“Okay, yeah, this does look kind of weird.” She chuckles.

“What’s so funny?” 

“Nothing. You’re just cute always caring about me.”

“Don’t think you can sweet talk your way out of this.” She sits down next to Enny and they both stare out over the water. “Can I tell you something weird?”

“I love weird.” Enny smiles. 

“I keep having these weird dreams.” Enny looks at her immediately. “They’re more like nightmares. They’re about this art piece I’m working on. That probably sounds crazy, you know, to have nightmares about art.” She gives a forced chuckle.

“That’s not crazy at all.” Enny reassures her. “It’s something you’re passionate about. It’s only natural to impact you in unexpected ways.”

“Yeah.” She looks down. “It’s not like it’s the first time to happen. This just feels different.”

“Different how?”

“Well, usually I have an idea of where the art is going and where it came from. But now, I feel like an observer instead of a participant. I don’t know where these ideas came from and I have no idea what it’s going to look like when it’s done. And, well, I’m scared of what it might be.”

“You’re scared?”

“Yeah,” she rubs the back of her hand. “It’s slightly out of phase, like it’s on the edge of two different worlds. And whatever it is, it’s dark Enny. It’s sucking me into this deep void of despair. It’s suffocating and powerful.”

“That sounds terrifying.” Enny’s face stills.

Chapter Text

Enny walks out on the far pier on the eastern beach. Fewer people come out to this unlit dock. Most of the town is on the western side by Willy’s Bait Shop. 

Everyone keeps telling Enny how incredible and rare of a sight it is to see the moonlight jellies as they migrate past the island. Supposedly, they light up the water. Enny is skeptical, but curious. 

Most festivals are lively and joyous, but this one feels different. There’s a somber enjoyment as they huddle around the light boats to be sent off out to sea. It’s eerie and sends chills down Enny’s spine. She decides to spend time away from the town and hide out on this pier. But she is not the only one. At the end, she sees a figure turn and walk back towards her.

“Leah?” Enny asks. “Is that you?”

“Oh, hey Enny,” her usual cheerfulness replaced by a melancholic tone. 

“Hey, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I’m just out here to pay my respects to another summer. I’m going to head back over to the boats though. It’ll start soon.”

Leah walks past her and back to the beach. She carries something heavy with her, despite her pleasant demeanor. She’s shown Enny a little about foraging, but she puts up a wall between them, hidden by a soft small.

Enny continues to the edge of the water and sits with her legs hanging over the dock. She stares out into the dark abyss and the water is silent and still. There isn’t a single ripple or breeze brushing against its surface. It only reflects the scattered light from the stars overhead, making it impossible to distinguish the sea from the sky.

The silence is broken by soft footsteps behind her. Enny turns to see the dark silhouette of a familiar body she has been getting to know. Neither says a word as Sebastian sits next to Enny. They both sit there, staring out at the sea until he breaks the silence.

“What are you thinking?”

“The ocean scares me.”

“Then I shouldn’t tell you that I saw something moving in there... something big, something dark.” He gives her a low chuckle and soft shoulder nudge.

“Be careful. I might push you in.”

“I’ll pull you with me.”

“I believe that.” She breathes out a small laugh, sending it out to the sea.

“What about it scares you?” He asks. She thinks a moment before responding.

“The depths of its darkness,” her voice is quiet. “I’m afraid I’ll sink into it and never find my way to the surface again.”

Enny feels a familiar panic dig its way up into her chest. It’s suffocating, tying to consume her and bury what’s left of her under the water. So, she’ll never be seen again, left to sink into oblivion.

Suddenly, she feels a gentle pressure on her hand, pulling her from her thoughts. She looks down to see the faint outline of Sebastian’s hand on hers.

“I’m sorry,” his voice is low. “I didn’t mean to bring up something painful. Are you okay?”

Am I? She wonders. It has been half a year since moving here. She thinks back to when she first arrived and thinks she’s healed considerably since then. It’s been subtle, but real. She has undergone a fundamental shift and has slowly discovered who she really is. 

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she starts. “I’m sorry, I get kind of anxious.”

“I understand.” He squeezes her hand lightly. “I do too.”

“Really? You don’t strike me as the anxious type. The opposite really. You’re pretty confident…and arrogant.” He laughs softly at her all too accurate assessment.

“It’s just a ruse. I actually suffer from crippling anxiety, and well, depression too.” He looks down at their dangling feet. “Sometimes I wonder if it would matter if I just disappeared. Or if anyone would care.”

“I would care,” she says without hesitation, squeezing his hand back.

He slips his fingers through hers and pulls her hand up to his face. He gently kisses the top of it before setting it back down on her lap, but he doesn’t release her fingers. 

Silence engulfs them once again as they stare out into the abyss. A faint light appears out of the corner of Enny’s eye, and she turns to see a light boat floating towards them.

“It’s started,” Sebastian cuts through the silence with his velvety voice, barely above a whisper. “They release the boats and it attracts the jellies.”

As if on cue, a small glow emanates from beneath the surface of the ocean. Enny gasps at the small jelly gracefully swimming towards them. It flows effortlessly through the water.

“It’s beautiful.” Her eyes widen in its light. “They really do this every year?”

“Mhm,” he hums. “They signify the end of summer.”

“Is that why everyone’s so sad and quiet? They just don’t want it to end?”

“Maybe, but I also think it has to do with what happens after summer.”

“And what’s that?” Enny asks.

“In the valley, it’s the beginning of death,” his voice low. “The trees die, the weather gets colder, the forests become quiet, and life hides away until it is reborn in the spring.”

 “My brother died in the winter.” 

She doesn’t know why that slipped out. Sebastian turns to look at her, but her eyes remain fixed on the floating jelly in front of them. He says nothing, waiting for her to continue when she’s ready.

“I felt like I died with him. I should have died with him.” She smiles bitterly to herself as a chill spreads through her body. “I felt like a walking corpse for years.”

“Do you still feel that way?”

“Part of me does.” She looks down to their hands. “It’s trapped under that ocean, in the abyss.”

“What about the other part?”

“It’s learning to swim,” she chuckles. “I bet you weren’t expecting cheesy metaphors tonight. Or an emotional dump.” She turns towards him, looking up at his black featureless eyes in the low light that mirror the depths of the ocean.

“I want to know you.”

“Bold statement,” she laughs.

“Why’s that so funny?” He smiles. “I like you, okay. I want to get to know you.”

“You like me?” She mocks. “What are we, teenagers?” She scoffs. “I would hope you like me at least a little, considering…” She gestures to their interlaced hands.

“Yeah,” he chuckles lightly. “It would be kind of awkward if I didn’t.”

“And don’t think I haven’t noticed how much of an ass you are when we’re around other people,”she says playfully.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He averts his gaze.

“No idea? None, at all?” She moves her head closer to his, drawing his eyes back to hers. “You find any excuse you can to talk about flowers or honey. AND you have to stop licking your fingers. That shit is driving me crazy.”

“Because you like it?” He smirks.

“Shut up.” She rolls her eyes, and he laughs. “Ugh, that reminds me,” she groans and looks up to the sky in defeat.

“Enny….did you bring me another gift?” His jaw drops in shock. “To the dance of the moonlight jellies?” His voice quiets as though someone might hear them. “There are people here. Or….is that what you’re into.” He gives her a sly smile. 

“I wasn’t exactly expecting to give it to you. Or at least not at the festival. Maybe afterwards.” She returns his smile, feeling heat rush to her face. “But now I don’t know if I should give it to you at all.”

“Oh, no. It’s far too late for that.” He grabs her bag from behind her.

“Hey!” She shouts. “Don’t go through my shit.”

He just laughs and hands her the bag. She removes her hand from his and opens it. She digs through it for a minute before pulling her hand out. She sets the bag behind her with her free hand and turns toward Sebastian.

“I found it in the caves today. As soon as I saw it, I thought of you.” She opens her hand and a small white gem, tinted by the blue of the moonlight, lies in it. “It’s a frozen tear. I found it in an ice cave.”

He reaches out and picks up the tear, rubbing the smoothly polished stone between his fingers.

“I love it.” He looks up to her and takes her face in his hand. She melts into his touch, and he pulls her into him. He wraps his arms around her and whispers.

“Thank you.”

He pulls his head back slightly and leans down to bring his lips to hers. His soft lips gently crash into hers and she melts into his warm kiss. She pulls herself closer to him, deepening the kiss. His body responds by pulling her into his lap, with her legs spread out and wrapped around his back.

He pulls her down and she grinds herself along him. Even through his jeans, Enny can feel him harden under her. She leans into his lips, and he grabs the back of her head, forcing her mouth to part. He kisses her passionately and relentlessly, until she’s gasping for air. 

“Sebastian,” she moans.

“Yoba, I fucking love it when you say my name.”

He thrusts up into her, while she rides him over their clothes. Sebastian slides his hands under her shirt and up her back. He grabs her and pulls her down onto him harder. Enny moans into his ear as he caresses her body. He pushes her back slightly and brings his hand to her breast. He cups it while thrusting into her. 

He slides his hand back down her body and reaches for the bottom of her shirt. He quickly pulls it over her head, leaving only her bra. He immediately returns his hand to her breast and leaves a trail of kisses and light bites down her neck.

 He gently pulls her breast out from her bra and licks around her nipple. She moans harder and grabs the back of his head, pulling him into her, forcing him to take it all in his mouth. He wraps his lips around her nipple and gently sucks as she grinds harder into him, feeling every fiber of fabric between them.

“Sebastian,” she breathes.

He groans into her and the vibrations send waves of pleasure through her body. Her hands slide down his back, reaching for his own shirt. He breaks their contact to tear it off, immediately burying his face back into her chest. She arches back, feeling the chill of the night spread across her fiery skin.

Sebastian slides his free hand down her side and onto her hip. He grips her tightly, pulling her down harder. No amount of force brings them close enough. She pulls his head deeper into her chest, begging for more.  His hand moves further down, pulling up her skirt to reveal her matching panties. 

“Did you wear this just for me?” He pulls away just long enough to say. She just nods, her eyes pleading for him to continue. “You’re such a good girl.”

“Sebastian,” she begs.

“Mhm?” He hums, while placing light kisses along her neck.

“Sebastian, don’t make me wait any longer.”

“Tell me. What do you want?”

“You.”

“What do you want from me?”

“Sebastian,” she moans. “Sebastian please. I want to feel you. All of you. I want to fuck you. Make me scream your name.”

He pushes her body back slightly as she leans her head forward to nibble on his neck. She hears the sound of a belt being pulled off and it makes her bite into him harder. Soon, his hands find their way back to her hips and he pulls her forward. A jolt of electricity pulses through as her soaked panties slide over his hard dick throbbing underneath her. 

Again, she grabs the back of his head and pulls him into her breast. Her other hand slides between her legs and pulls her panties to the side. She grinds against him with her exposed pussy dripping down his cock. He moans and thrusts up, but doesn’t enter her yet, just sliding across her exposed clit.

“Tell me. What do you want?” She echoes his words to him.

“You. All of you,” he says, out of breath. “I want to hear you scream my name.”

She lowers her hips until the tip of his head presses against her entrance, begging to be let in. She gasps as he thrusts up into her, filling her with a tight warm sensation. He digs his hands into her hips, using them to force her down harder, deeper. Fire erupts from her body as he buries himself in her over and over again. A deep moan fills her throat and she knows she’s close.

She fucks him hard and slow. Feeling every inch of him as she glides over his thick cock. It stretches her out as her walls close down on him. Her pace quickens and he squeezes her hips so hard it begins to hurt. 

“Fuck,” he breathes. “You feel too good.”

“Are you close for me?” She asks smugly.

“So close.”

“Do you want to cum inside of me?”

“Yoba yes,” he pleads.

“Do you want me to scream your name?”

“I don’t think you could stop it if you tried.” He smirks, but she hears the desperation in his voice.

“People will hear us.” 

He reaches up and slides his hand over her neck. She fucks him harder, faster. As waves of pleasure intensify in her, she feels his grip tighten. Moans escape her lips, so he grabs harder. She grinds into him as he thrusts up faster. He swells inside of her, and she feels like she will burst with pleasure. She wants it harder. She wants it to hurt. She can’t hold it back any longer as he pushes her into her orgasm.

Just as she is about to yell his name, he tightens his grip to stifle her screams. His name comes out breathlessly through squeaks. The guttural sound sends Sebastian into a heated frenzy as he thrusts up into her rapidly. It hurts how hard he’s fucking her, and she loves it. She wants to feel this man completely wreck her. 

Her pussy slams down onto his throbbing dick as it fills with a warm wet liquid. It fills her completely until it drips out of her. She slides over his cock slowly to feel how much he filled her up. 

“Fuck,” he gasps.

He pulls Enny down into a deep kiss and she sinks into his arms. They sit there like that until a slight chill spreads across Enny’s skin.

“Are you cold?” He asks.

“A little,” she concedes. 

He reaches behind him where he hastily threw her shirt, grabbing it and hands it to her. She puts it over her head and sees he’s holding out his hoodie as well.

“Take this too,” he says, handing it to her. 

She feels her face heat up as she takes the hoodie and puts it on. 

“Thanks.” He flashes her a devious smile. “What’s the look for?”

“No look.” The smile grows. “This is my normal face.”

“There’s definitely a look.” She pulses her walls over his sensitive dick, making him shake. “Tell me.”

“Fine, alright,” he laughs. “You just look cute in my hoodie is all.”

“Stop laughing or I’ll throw it in the ocean right now. It’ll be lost to sea for the rest of time. It’ll only be known by legend passed down through song.”

“At least it will live on,” he laughs, pulling her in for another kiss. He gently combs his hand through her hair, causing her to close her eyes at the intimate moment. “I meant it before,” he starts. She slightly opens her eyes. “I really do like you.”

“I really like you too.” She smiles.

Enny wakes up, already crying. That night holds a special place in her heart. After that, her and Sebastian spent every moonlight of the jellies on the pier. They tried to refrain from their extracurricular nighttime activities, failing, until Izzy came.

She would make her own special boat to ‘lure out the jellies,’ as she would say. She squealed in delight every year when one would swim to the surface to greet her. One year, she was determined to catch one. She brought a jar that was far too small to catch anything, reached down to scoop it up. She immediately dropped the jar and cried. 

Enny misses her family. Summer is almost over, and she still has no idea how to get home. Rasmodious will be meeting with the council in a couple weeks, but that feels tortuously far from now. She spends most of her free time training with Marlon trying to stave off the helplessness of the situation, but it feels as though she’s chasing a ghost. The relief she so desperately pursues is always just out of reach. 

Ever since she drank the wizard’s vile potion, she has been back to full strength, maybe even more. She is re-energized and motivated. Harvey didn’t believe her when she said she was just a fast healer, but he couldn’t deny her progress. He finally released her from daily check-ins to weekly ones instead. 

Leah has still been a recluse and rarely returns her texts. Emily assures Enny she’s still alive, but she’s worried about her too. Even Shane has been walking by her cabin more in hopes of seeing Leah, but to no avail. 

Shane stops by most mornings before work to make sure Enny is okay. Ever since the day at the wizard’s, he’s found her working in the fields. He scolded her that first day until he saw just what she could do. Enny tried to explain to him that it was from a magical wizard potion, but surprisingly he didn’t believe her. 

Enny quickly gets ready and rushes out to do her work. She only has to water her crops today and check on the chickens and cows. She finishes quickly and cleans up her tools. She empties her bag as much as she can and turns toward the northern path.

Today’s the day. Today, she and Marlon go back in. Her body buzzes with nervous excitement. They’ve spent much of the last week training, preparing for this day, but now that it’s here, the panic in her chest threatens its way up her throat.

“You’re out early today,” Shane calls from behind her.

“Yeah, not much work this morning.” She stops and waits for him to catch up.

“Want some company up to Marlon’s?” He asks.

“Let’s go.” She nods, and they begin their walk.

“I still can’t believe how quickly you healed. Or that you’re still going into those mines.”

“I told you.” She smiles. “Magical wizard potion.”

“Fine, keep your secrets.” He side eyes her. “You coming to see the jellies tonight?”

“No,” she says dryly, sucking the life from the conversation.

“Okay…” he trails off.

“Sorry, I’m just not into it.”

“You don’t seem like the kind of person to hate on a night full of jellyfish.”

“I’ve been before, and it just hurts to think about now.”

“With your grandpa?”

“Not exactly.” She doesn’t want to lie to him, but she also can’t tell him the truth. “It’s complicated,” she admits. “You going with Jas and Marnie?” She poorly attempts to take the attention off of her.

“Mhm.” He raises an eyebrow, skeptically. “I used to go with Stella and Derick,” his voice softens. They’ve talked more about their losses, revealing small pieces at a time to each other. “Can I ask you something?”

“Oh, shit,” her voice drops. “This must be serious.” She forces a chuckle to hide her insecurity.

“Why didn’t you go to your grandpa’s funeral?”

“Ah.” She looks down at the ground in front of them. She wondered when someone would ask. “He died right after my brother,” she forces an even tone, hiding the hurt and frustration. “And my mom didn’t think I needed to know,” venom seeps into her words, momentarily breaking her control. “My parents split when I was young. My dad took off and my mom cut off his side of the family, including my grandpa.”

“That’s fucked up,” his voice a mixture of sympathy and frustration. 

“Yeah, it gets worse.” She clenches her jaw, trying to keep the anger at bay. “He sent me a letter and the deed to the farm, but only had my mom’s address. She hid it from me. It was dumb luck that I found it one day at her house. I was so pissed.” Enny balls her hands into fists, digging the nails into her skin. She takes a deep breath, letting the anger wash over her. “Anyway,” she brings back the stillness of her voice. “We got into a fight and I haven’t seen her since. I packed up my shit from my shitty apartment in that shitty town full of shitty memories and never looked back.”

“Yoba, Enny,” he starts. “That…how could anyone…your own mother?” His voice slightly rises in anger and confusion.

“Yep,” she speaks hollowly. “My own mother.” She opens her hands, looking at the impressions from her nails in her palms. “I know people talk about it. I’ve heard their hushed whispers and seen the looks.” 

Not only here. It took Enny a long time to absolve herself of the guilt and shame from not being here when he was sick. If she’s honest with herself, she never really forgave herself. It’s why she never asked about what he went through in the end, even after all these years. Sebastian was the only person she told the truth. Even in her town, they all probably still gossip about it.

“Fuck ‘em,” he asserts, hardening his face. “It’s none of their business.” A warm smile tugs at her lips. This gruff man always seems to know what she needs to hear. “I’m not much of a fighter but I can sick the chickens on them.” That elicits a chuckle from Enny.

They spend the rest of the walk taking jabs at each other. Enny is grateful for the light conversation. She doesn’t want to think about today and appreciates the distraction. When the entrance of the cave and Marlon next to it come into view, Enny turns to look at Shane.

“Thanks for the company. I still can’t believe how much I actually like hanging out with you. Honestly, it’s pretty gross.” She pretends to gag.

“The feeling’s mutual,” he sighs. “Let me know when you’re done. Or don’t.” He kicks the dirt. “Whatever.”

A smile spreads slowly across Enny’s face. 

“I will.” She pulls him into a hug. “Have fun tonight.”

He grumbles inaudible words before turning to disappear through the forest, leaving Enny to walk across the bridge.

“Hey Marlon.” Enny smiles fondly at the man.

“Morning Enny.” He nods slightly. “Are you ready?” He asks to confirm her resolve rather than to check for doubts.

“I am.” She nods resolutely.

Together they step through the threshold of the cave. The warmth of the summer cannot permeate the chill of the cavern. Enny’s heart beats rapidly against her ribcage as her body emanates its own cold. She flexes her fingers in anticipation, allowing them to trace the hilts of her sword and dagger. Her mind races with the last attack, images of long slender claws sinking into her stomach, laying in the damp heat that was her blood. Sweat beads form at the back of her neck, her breath quickens, and her heart beats more ferociously.

“Enny.” Marlon places his hand on her shoulder, momentarily breaking her thoughts. “Focus on me.” She opens her eyes, unsure of when she closed them, and lets her gaze rest on Marlon’s face. “I’ll be with you the entire time. We can leave whenever you want.”

“Okay,” she clears her throat. “Can we start at the first level?” 

“Of course.” 

With his nod, she feels some of her fear dissipate. Since the wizard’s potion, Enny has spent most of her free time up here with Marlon training. Physically, she is fine, but mentally, she feels shattered. Today is the first day back in the mines rather than training by the Guild.

Marlon walks over to the ladder and climbs down first. Enny watches him disappear into the darkness and feels that panic creep up into her chest, trying to choke her. She quickly walks to the shaft and climbs down. Her head spins lightly and her eyes dart back and forth, taking in the barren rocks and stone. She frantically searches for any monsters, but instead finds Marlon standing a few feet in front of her.

“Deep breaths,” he speaks softly. 

Enny listens to his words and focuses on her breathing. She sends out feelers through her arms and legs, taking in all the cave has to offer. The ground remains firm under her feet, the chill separate from the coldness in her arms, and light echoes of skittering bats tease her ears. I can do this.

She takes a tentative step forward, then another, and another. Until she finds she is walking through the cave with intention rather than fear. A flash of green at the corner of her vision pulls her attention to a rock on the ground. Behind it, a small ball of putrid slime drags its body through the dirt. A wave of frigid blood passes from her head down into her neck, but she remains firmly planted in place. She reaches for her blade, hearing the familiar reverberation from the sword being drawn. Her mind detaches from her body. She becomes a spectator as the blade effortlessly slices through the goo. It convulses for a moment before losing its shape, liquifying into a puddle. 

“I did it,” she whispers through numb lips. “I did it,” blood pumps through her muscles. “I did it!” She exclaims, turning towards Marlon wearing a bright smile.

“Yes you did.” He walks towards her. “How do you feel?”

“So fucking scared,” she laughs to herself. “But also so good. I feel like I just took on an entire army.”

“It’s a big accomplishment.” He points to another slime on the other side of the cave. “Want to keep going?”

“Fuck yeah.” The cold fear fights for control once again, but she pushes her body past it and to the slime.

Sebastian sits at the end of the dark pier and stares into the darkness in front of him. He normally loves the dance of the moonlight jellies, but this year feels different. Abby still avoids him and Sam seems torn about who to hang out with. He figures it would be better tonight if he spent the festival alone on the dock. 

He’s angry, all the time. He dreams about Enny almost every night. Last night’s dream was particularly difficult and probably contributed to him coming out to this dock. When he closes his eyes, he can almost feel her sitting next to him and the touch of her fingers.

Why won’t they fucking stop? He asks himself every day. He feels like he’s going crazy. His body yearns for Enny and he hates it. He hates her. She has such a power over her but uses it to make him feel small. Every time he sees her, he’s reminded of something he’s lost. It’s like there is more to his dreams, but it slips away as soon as he wakes up.

He’s not just angry at her. He’s angry at home, or angrier. He wasn’t exactly happy before, but he constantly feels on edge around not only Demetrius, but Robin and Maru as well. He hates his home and how he feels there.

But most of all, he hates himself. He hates that he hurt Abby again. He hates that he hurts Sam. He hates that he’s a worthless piece of shit that sucks the life out of everyone around him. They would be better off without him. Sure, it would hurt for a while, but eventually they’ll realize how much happier they would be without him.

Chapter Text

A muffled sound slowly pulls Shane from his sleep. He tears his heavy eyelids open just enough to see the deep red streaks of a sunrise peeking through the blinds. He’s weak to their weight and the pounding in his head forces his eyes shut again. As he feels the world slip away, he hears the sound again. It’s louder this time, more defined and clear. Someone’s knocking on the door. Again, he rips his eyes open despite his body’s protests. His head threatens to break apart at any moment. 

“Ugh,” he groans hoarsely. He shifts his heavy body to find the familiar sensation of the couch assaulting his back. He tries to get off, but his sluggishness throws him off balance and falling to the floor on his shoulder. “Fuck!” He shouts, as he rolls onto his stomach. He props himself up on his forearms, immediately regretting being head down as his stomach churns violently. He quickly pushes himself up into a sitting position, forcing his nausea back down. The knocking continues, sending a jolt of pain through his head with each hit. “Hang on,” he calls, fighting against his body’s weakness in this state.

The knocking stops, allowing Shane a moment of quiet to collect his thoughts. He’s pretty sure Stella and Derick brought him home last night. He clearly didn’t make it to his bed. He doesn’t know what time it is, but he knows it’s too early for someone to be at his door. He slowly climbs to his feet, using the couch as support. His head spins a little, telling him he is not only hungover, but still a little drunk. He takes a few steps towards his door, but stumbles into the nearby kitchen counter. He steadies himself on the hard cold surface, hoping to steal some of its stability. 

After a minute or so, Shane tentatively walks toward the door again, certain that whoever was there has left. Each step shakes off some of his grogginess, letting his mind clear a little more. His stomach settles slightly as he reaches out for the handle. He wobbles as he opens the door, but manages to stay upright. Once open, Shane looks at two police officers standing in front of his apartment.

“We’re sorry to disturb you so early,” the middle-aged man says. “We’re from the Zuzu Police Department. Are you Shane Cape?” Shane studies the officer’s worn face. His face looks heavy with an invisible weight behind it. He shifts his gaze to the younger female officer next to him. She stands at his height and carries a more stoic face, giving away little emotion.

“Uh, yeah that’s me,” Shane replies, feeling his heart beating under his breath. “Why?”

“Is Stella Cape your cousin?” The older officer asks.

“Yeah.” His chest constricts slightly. “Why?”

“Can we come in?” The man asks.

Shane considers the man’s request, but doesn’t trust himself to stably walk back inside. He decides it’s best to get whatever this is over with here.

“If this is some joke, you can tell Stella it’s not funny,” he sighs.

“Please,” a pleading voice comes from the female officer, the only indication of emotion. “This would be better if we can go inside.” Her eyes give away little explanation, but he knows whatever this is about, she’s right.

“Fine,” he grumbles. 

Shane fully opens the door and motions them inside. He closes it, noticing how much his hands are shaking. 

“Can we sit down?” The older man asks.

Shane looks at the distance to the couch compared to the bar stools at the kitchen counter he narrowly avoided earlier. He takes the step towards them, thankful not to fall. He sits on the nearest chair as the officers sit at the other two.

“So, what’s the joke?” Shane starts almost angrily, his poor attempt to suppress the blossoming panic in his chest.

“Shane,” the man begins. “Stella and Derick were in a car accident last night. I’m sorry, but they didn’t survive.” The man clenches his jaw, uncomfortably swallowing.

“What are you talking about?” Shane asks in disbelief. 

“Shane–”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Shane jumps up and cuts the man off. “This isn’t funny.”

“Shane,” the woman’s soft voice momentarily cuts through his rage. “This isn’t a joke.” He looks into her glossy eyes and sees the truth. Her mask slips enough for him to see the pain hidden behind her brown eyes.

“Wh-what happened?” He asks in disbelief as he sits back down.

“They ran a light and hit another car,” the man’s solemn voice pulls Shane’s attention. “They died before paramedics arrived.” He looks down bringing Shane to a realization.

“You were there?” He turns back to the woman and sees light tears crawling down her cheeks. She merely nods in response.

He tries to find words, anything, but nothing comes. They both speak, but he can’t hear them, can’t see them. He sees Stella’s bright smile running ahead of him, Derick at his side laughing. They were both so full of life. They can’t be gone. No.

“They were drunk,” Shane whispers. 

His heart crashes into his ribcage repeatedly. They don’t even have time to respond. Adrenaline floods his system, anger drowns his lungs, and he’s yelling. He doesn’t know what. The words never reach his brain, he only reacts. 

“Shane? Shane?” The man tries to calm him down. Shane’s head screams and his hands hurt. He looks at the white knuckles of his fists.

“Where’s Jas?” He asks, suddenly shrinking into the world thinking about her.

“She’s with child services,” the man responds, anticipating the question.  “She’s waiting to be picked up by you. You’re listed as her emergency guardian.”

No. He killed his friends and now he has to face Jas. How can he look at her? How can he face her after what he did?

“I can’t,” he croaks.

“That’s okay,” the woman’s compassionate voice sends tears burning down Shane’s face. “Is there someone else we can call?”

“Marnie.”

Shane doesn’t really know what happened next. One minute he’s in his apartment yelling, the next he’s walking with Marnie up to the double doors where Jas is waiting on the other side. He stops just before the threshold as Marnie steps through. She turns back to him, her face red and blotchy from crying.

“I-I can’t” he struggles to get out, focusing his gaze on the cement steps.

“Okay,” she says quietly while placing her hand on his shoulder. He brings his eyes up to meet hers. She looks torn, but he knows she’ll make the right choice and go in there instead of staying out here with him. “I,” she hesitates. “I love you Shane. I’ll be back.”

She walks into the gray and red stone building, stopping immediately. Shane sees her clearly through the still open doors. Then he sees her. A flash of black rushing towards Marnie. She buries her face in Marnie’s arms sobbing.

“Aunt Marnie!” The girl cries. “Where’s mommy and daddy?” Shane can’t see Marnie’s face, but his own distorts into something harrowing. Shane’s chest feels like it’s cleaved open and anything good left in him floods out, leaving only agony and despair.

“My little rose,” her voice starts to break. “They were in an accident. They…” Marnie can’t seem to finish the words that will crush this little girl’s world.

“Where are they?” She wails. “Mommy!” She cries. “Daddy!” Marnie grabs the little girl tightly, holding her to her chest.

Her cries rip the rest of Shane’s heart from his chest, disconnecting him from any feeling. He turns away and just walks. He continues down the street as a zombie, mindlessly driving forward, attempting to leave his shame behind. He can’t get far enough from it. The pain follows closely behind, gaining ground. Shane bursts into a sprint, desperate to put space between them. It closes in on him. He feels it breathing down his neck, threatening to consume him. He can’t think, can’t focus. His feet move independently from his mind until he suddenly finds himself sitting on a hard stool in a dark and damp bar. Then, he drinks.

Shane stares motionless at the ceiling fan. The ever growing hole in his chest sucks in every bit of pain to fuel his self inflicted torture. It rejects anything good, leaving only suffering in its wake. What’s the point? This pain will never stop. The world endlessly crushes him. He tries to move but can’t. He just lays there, trapped under an invisible weight, staring at the fan. Tears stream down his face, leaving burning trails down his temples, until the fan gives a dying scream. He watches it as it slows to a stop for the last time.

Its wails momentarily release him from his prison, long enough for him to reach over for the bottle by his bed. He props himself up on his elbows and drinks the bottle. He lets the liquor flow freely down his throat, spreading fire at its touch until it’s empty. Then he lays back down and looks at the motionless fan. Every part of his body aches, screams at him, hates him. You’re worthless, a burden. Derick and Stella are dead because of you. Jas lost everything because of you.

He tries to tell himself it’s not true, but he can’t. Instead, he curls into a ball and covers his ears as if it’ll shut out the thoughts. The constant battle chips away at him, leaving nothing but a husk of a person. Guilt consumes him and he’s tired of fighting it. Just die. Just die. Just die. The voice repeats over and over.

“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!” He shouts. He jumps up and runs out the door. He goes to the coop and sits in the back corner. The pain drowns him and all he sees are their faces. He hears Stella’s laughter, Derick’s dramatic groans. He can’t push their memories away. They flood his mind, demanding retribution, eating away at whatever remains of his soul. His own personal torment.

He buries his head into his knees and digs his hands into the back of his head. He continues to hear their voices over his own sobs.

“STOP!” He shouts. Suddenly, he feels something brush against his leg and his hand flies out to meet the frail body of a chicken. She screeches as he effortlessly sends her flying into the nearby wall. He turns to look at the little brown chicken lying on the ground, fear in her eyes.

He rushes over to her, but she jumps up and runs away from him with a limp. All you do is hurt everyone around you. First Stella and Derick, then Jas, and now you’re punishing the poor animals that trust you. You’re fucking pathetic.

The voice is right. He destroys everything good in his life and hides behind his intentions. He doesn’t mean to hurt everyone around him, but it doesn’t matter. In the end, he’s the problem. He’s toxic and a cancer. 

He grabs the hidden bottle behind the hay and rushes out of the house into the pouring rain. He runs frantically through the woods, only stopping to take heavy drinks from the bottle. The downpour hides his tears, while the alcohol tears through his throat. He empties the bottle with one final chug and throws it to the muddy ground. He looks toward the direction of the sea and breaks into a sprint. He stops at the edge of the cliffs and looks out to the horizon. Do it. The voice rings through his head. It’s the only way you’ll ever escape your pain. It’ll bring peace to those around you. He closes his eyes and feels the wind swirl around him.

He takes a tentative step forward. More. Then another step. More. The voice demands. He opens his eyes to find he is inches from the edge. This is your escape. This is MY escape. He knows this is the only way. He closes his eyes one last time and takes his final step. 

For a moment, everything is quiet. He no longer hears the rain or the voice in his head. He only feels a gentle brush of wind from beneath him. He feels light, lighter than he's ever felt before. It's as though the weight of his guilt finally lifts from his body, granting him a moment of reprieve from the all consuming torture. He finally feels the freedom from the bondage he’s carried for so long. 

Then, the weightlessness turns into something faster and sudden. The wind hits him harder, crashing into his body, and the sounds of the world come screeching back. His blood ices in his veins, numbing his limbs. He reaches out for anything to grab onto, but his hands flail wildly. 

Fear grips him. It clenches his throat and hits him in his stomach. He peels his eyes open against his body's wishes. The last thing he sees are gray clouds above him. 

Chapter Text

Enny wakes up to knocking. She thinks it’s too early for anyone to come over, but she drags herself up and out of bed nonetheless. She opens the door to find Mayor Lewis standing on her porch in the rain.

“Hi Enny.” He looks down at her feet. “I’m sorry to wake you so early.” He brings his gaze up to meet hers.

“What’s going on?” She feels a pit form in her stomach. “Is everything okay?”

He lets out a deep sigh before answering.

“No.” He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “There was an accident last night at the cliffs. Shane,” he pauses, swallowing hard. “He…fell off and…” he trails off, struggling to find the words.

Enny watches tears stream down the man’s worn face, heavy with wrinkles and exhaustion.

“Is…” she starts, fearing his answer. “Is he okay?” Lewis slowly shakes his head. “Is he alive?”

Again, Lewis shakes his head, weakly. Enny didn’t know Shane very well, only having run into each other a few times. Each exchange was borderline hostile. Still, she knew what he meant to Marnie and Jas. After a long pause, Lewis finally speaks.

“We’re going to have a memorial service in two days.”

“Okay,” Enny responds meekly. “What can I do to help?”

She knows what mourning does to people. Planning a memorial will be painful for Marnie, especially while taking care of Jas.

Enny wakes to a familiar stabbing in her head and the gentle patter of rain on the cabin roof. She drags herself out of bed, drinks some water, and prepares for the day. She has little work to do, but that gives her more time in the mines up the mountain. The rain watered her crops and the animals only need to be fed. None of that takes long and she readies herself to leave for the mines, but a thought crosses her mind. Where’s Shane? He should have stopped by already. She looks at the clock and knows he’ll be working soon. Maybe he overslept? The small mystery in light of her dream nags at her mind.

She packs her mining equipment back into the chest and heads to the southern path. By the time she arrives at Marnie’s, she’s already soaked by the rain and the cold is seeping into her bones. She stops breathing when she sees the front door wide open. 

Something happened. She sprints inside to find the house empty. Think Enny think. It’s Tuesday, which means Marnie’s in cardio class and Jas is with Penny. But where’s Shane? She runs through the kitchen to find his door and the coop door open as well. Shit. Where the fuck is he?

She runs back to the front door and stops in the rain. Her heart beats ferociously in her chest. Where is he? She needs him to be safe. She thinks back to her world and wracks her brain for what happened to him. Maybe it’s something similar to what happened there, like her brother’s death. 

The cliffs. Whatever happened, it happened there. She sprints through the woods, while her mind races. Just ahead lies an empty bottle of liquor in the mud with footprints heading towards where she fears most. Everyone said it was an accident, but what if it wasn’t? She pushes the thought down and forces her legs to run harder. She won’t lose him too. 

She breaks through the forest and meets the edge of the cliffs herself. She frantically scans the roaring water far below then brings her eyes to the ledge near her. She spots Shane as he slowly steps towards the abyss.

“Shane!” She calls out, but the rain muffles her screams. She races towards him, running parallel to the cliff. He’s inches from the edge. Adrenaline rushes through her, inducing a pressured panic, driving her legs harder into the ground. Every muscle tenses in her body and burns, but she pushes through it, forcing herself to go faster. Faster. Faster. FUCKING FASTER. She sees him close his eyes and take another step. NO! Her mind screams. 

Just as he’s about to step off the cliff face, Enny slams her body into his, sending them both flying to the ground a mere few feet from the edge. He slowly flutters his eyes open and searches until they find hers. He looks confused, unsure of what just happened. 

“Shane!” She screams.

“E-Enny?” He slurs through a drunken stupor. Even through the rain, she can smell the alcohol. 

“You’re a fucking idiot!” She yells, while her face contorts into a mixture of anger and fear. “You can’t just leave like that. You can’t leave Jas! You can’t leave me!” She screams.

His mouth moves, but no sounds come and his eyes absently stare off, unfocused.

Enny sits up and pulls him into a tight hug. 

“Please,” she cries. “Please don’t leave.”

She wails harder into him.

“So…much….pain,” he chokes out.

She doesn’t know what to say. What can she say? Before she thinks of a response, he goes limp in her arms. 

“Shane!” She screams. “Shane!” She yells louder while slapping his face. “You need to wake up you fucking chicken shit asshole!” She shouts desperately. “Wake up you fucking selfish piece of shit! I need you!” She bawls.

She looks around for help but sees nothing through the rain and trees. She pulls out her phone and calls Leah.

“Pick up. Pick up. Pick up,” she chants with her eyes closed.

“Hey girl,” she greets. “Wh—” Enny cuts her off.

“I need you. Shane’s not waking up.”

“Where are you?” She responds immediately.

“By the cliffs near the sewer. Leah, please hurry.”

“I’ll be there in five minutes. Call Harvey while you wait.”

“Okay,” she cries through a panicked breath and hangs up.

She dials Harvey’s number and practically yells at him through her sobs. She barely articulates the words, but he understands he’s needed now. 

“Stay on the line with me,” he demands calmly. “Tell me what happened.”

“He was going to fucking walk off a cliff,” she shouts through the pain and anger. “Then he hit the ground and said a few words before passing out. I know he’s drunk, but he won’t wake up. I don’t know what to do,” she cries.

“You’re doing good, Enny,” he attempts to soothe her over the phone. “Just listen to me okay. I’m going to walk you through what to do.”

“Please, I’ll do anything.”

“First, you need to check if he’s breathing. Look at his chest to see if it’s moving.”

She gently lays Shane back on the ground and stares at his chest for a few seconds, searching frantically for the slightest twitch.

“It’s moving!” She shouts.

“Okay, that’s really good,” he sighs with a breath of relief Enny can hear through the phone. “Keep watching it. Tell me if it stops or becomes shallow. Next, is anyone else around?”

“No, but Leah’s on her way.”

“Okay, great,” he responds with a level voice. “When she gets there, I need you to put her on the phone. Can you do that?”

“Yes of course,” she shouts into the phone, unable to control her volume through the intense emotions tearing her apart.

“Until then, count his breaths. I’m going to tell you when to start and stop. Are you ready?”

“Yes,” she asserts.

“Okay, good,” he says. “Start now and count out loud.”

“One,” she waits as an eternity passes. “Two.” She waits again. “Three. Four.”

“Okay, stop,” he interrupts. “I’m going to have you do it again. Are you ready?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, start.”

They do this several more times until Leah emerges from the trees. 

“Enny!” She shouts as she races over to them. Enny immediately reaches her phone out to Leah.

“Take it,” she screams. “It’s Harvey.”

Enny returns her eyes back to Shane. He’s lying motionless on the ground and Enny just wants to scream at him until he wakes up.

“Please Shane. Please be okay,” she pleads.

“Enny!” Leah calls while grabbing her shoulder. “Did you hear me?”

She shakes her head, completely unaware that she was talking or how much time has passed.

“I have to go out to meet Harvey. I need you to stay with Shane and keep counting his breaths. Harvey’s going to stay on the phone. Take it!” She pushes the phone into Enny's hand. “Do you understand?” She asks. Enny just nods. “I need you to say it. What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to stay here,” she starts robotically. “Count his breaths. Talk to Harvey.”

“Good.” Leah nods in approval. “I will be right back.” Leah gently squeezes her shoulder offering a small smile that wearing covers her own panic and fear.

Before Enny can respond, Leah bolts back into the woods. Enny brings the phone to her ear and hears Harvey.

“Enny?” He shouts. “Enny, are you there?”

“Ye-yeah,” she whispers, feeling the weight of the situation crushing her. “I’m here.”

“Okay, good. Count his breaths to me.”

“One. Two,” she pauses for too long. 

“Enny?” Harvey asks with urgency. “Are you still there?”

“Harvey,” she panics. “He’s not breathing.” 

The world becomes deadly silent and everything moves in slow motion. Enny tries to move her arms, to breathe, to do anything, but she feels frozen in place. 

“Enny!” Harvey’s voice cuts through the silence. “Stay with me! He needs your help!”

“Wh-what do I do?” She doesn’t even feel her mouth move with the words.

“Put your cheek over his mouth. If he’s breathing at all, you’ll be able to feel it.”

She leans over his face and holds her cheek in place. She waits until she hears Harvey’s voice again.

“Do you feel anything?” He asks.

“N-No,” she stutters. “Harvey, he’s not breathing.” Tears mix with the rain, streaming down her face. “What do I do Harvey?” She yells scared.

“Do you know how to check for a pulse at the neck?”

“Yes.” 

“Then do it now.”

She reaches her two fingers to his neck and puts pressure into it. She closes her eyes and waits. She needs to shut out the world and the rain so she can focus on the feeling through her fingertips. A light pulse pushes against her fingers.

“I feel it,” she shouts with a small victory. “But just barely. It’s weak.”

“Okay, good. That’s good,” he assures her. “Do you know how to do emergency breathing for someone?” 

“Yeah, I think so.” She thinks back to when she took a CPR class. “I learned a long time ago.”

“Okay, good,” he starts. “The first step is to open the airway. Grab under the sides of his jaw near his ears. Pull up slightly. It should make his jaw jut out forward.”

She listens to his instructions and finds the edges of his jaw. She puts the slightest pressure on him and his head tilts back as his jaw opens.

“Okay, I did it.”

“You’re doing great. Next, you’ll start breathing. Keep his head tilted back. You’ll need to pinch his nose, then give him a breath. Make sure you watch his chest. You want to make sure it’s rising with your breath,” he instructs. “Repeat what I just said.”

“Keep his head up. Pinch the nose. Breathe. Watch the chest,” she recounts.

“Exactly. Do it once then talk to me.”

Enny sets the phone down and moves her hand up to his nose. She leans in and breathes for Shane, watching his chest. She feels a small sliver of relief to see it moving. After the breath, she picks up the phone again.

“His chest moved.”

“That’s a good sign. Okay, I want you to count 5 seconds, then do it again. Put me on speaker and count out loud.”

She lays the phone on Shane’s chest and hits the speaker button.

“One, two, three, four, five.” She leans in to give him another breath. “One, two, three, four, five.”

She repeats this for several minutes, but it feels like hours. Finally, Harvey and Leah emerge from the trees and rush over to them. Enny looks up and screams.

“Hurry Harvey!”

He pushes her aside and immediately checks for a pulse and breathing again.

“He’s still not breathing. Enny, what happened right before he passed out?” Harvey pulls out a plastic bag attached to a face cover. He slips it over Shane’s face. He gently squeezes the bag and Shane’s chest rises again.

“He was by the cliff,” she pauses, searching her memory for any detail. “I ran into him and knocked him over. Then he passed out.”

“You knocked him over? How hard did you hit the ground?”

“Umm.” She forces her mind to recall the terror of that moment. “Pretty hard I think. He hit the ground first.”

In between breaths, Harvey feels around Shane’s head and stops on the back of it. He pulls his hands out from under it and they are streaked red with blood.

“He hit his head. We need to move him carefully and get him back to the clinic.” He continues to give him breaths. “Leah, go meet Lewis and grab the stretcher.”

Leah nods and disappears into the trees once again. Then Harvey turns toward Enny.

“Lewis and Maru are on the way with his truck. When they get here, we’re going to put Shane on the stretcher and carry him to the truck. I’m going to need your help.”

“What do I need to do?” She asks with a mix of panic and determination.

“I need you to help me carry him. It’ll take at least a minute to get him to the truck.”

“Okay.” She nods, clenching her jaw.

Harvey continues to administer breaths until Lewis and Leah run up to them with a stretcher. Harvey positions Shane on his side while supporting his head and neck.

“Maru, bring the stretcher to his back.”

She complies and together they roll Shane onto it in one swift motion. Harvey takes a minute to fasten him in, while Maru continues the breathing. 

“Maru, Enny.” He looks at them. “Grab the ends of the stretcher and on three, lift it up.” They get into position. “One, two, three!”

They lift Shane up and Harvey motions them towards the trees.

“Go slow and stay steady.”

They walk carefully, trying to avoid the branches and exposed roots. Finally, the truck comes into view and Harvey hops in the back, still holding the bag.

“Slide him in gently.”

Maru and Enny comply, until the stretcher is fully on the truck. Harvey pulls him the rest of the way and Maru hops up with him.

“Lewis!” He calls out. “Let’s go.”

Lewis just nods and runs to the driver’s seat. Leah and Enny rush to the passenger side and they all drive off towards the clinic. Enny squeezes her eyes shut and clenches her fists. Leah slips her hand over Enny’s and grabs tightly. They sit in agonizing silence until the clinic finally appears through the rain. They repeat the process of picking him up and transporting inside. Once they set him down in the emergency room, Maru ushers Enny, Leah, and Lewis out.

Enny stares blankly at the double doors to the back of the clinic. Hours pass in a blur. At some point, Enny sits down and stares at her hands, unable to comprehend Leah’s and Lewis’ words. He eventually leaves, but Leah remains. Marnie arrives, but Enny doesn’t know if she says anything or just absently waits alongside her. Leah holds her hand until eventually, against Enny’s wishes, her body succumbs to exhaustion and she drifts off to sleep.

Chapter Text

"Enny," a hoarse voice calls distantly. "Enny, wake up. "

She feels a gentle nudge on her shoulder and a stiff pain through her back. She shifts to find she's still on the uncomfortable waiting room chair. Pulling herself upright, she blinks several times to find Harvey in front of her.

"Harvey?" She asks, unsure of what's happening. "Where am I?"

She'll never be used to the uncertainty of waking up. 

"You're in the clinic."

"Why am I…," she trails off. Suddenly the memories flood back to her. Shane trying to walk off that cliff. When he stopped breathing. When they brought him to the clinic. "Shane! Where is he? Is he okay?" She jumps up. 

"Slow down, Enny." Harvey motions her to sit back down. "He's stable at the moment but he hasn't woken up. "

She blinks in confusion at him. 

"Okay so when will he?" She demands, anger flaring up through her words.

"I'm," he sighs. "Not sure. He had swelling in his head. I've done all I could. Now we just wait."

"Just wait!?" She shouts. "How the fuck am I supposed to just wait?"

"Enny, I know you're upset, but–"

"Upset?!" She cuts him off  "You think I'm just fucking upset?" Her face morphs into one of rage. "He tried to fucking kill himself Harvey. Upset is an understatement. Then you come out and tell me there's nothing else we can do. What kind of bullshit is that? You're a doctor. Fucking fix him!"

She feels tears pour from her eyes but it doesn't temper the fire building inside her. 

Just then, the front door swings open and Marnie steps in. They both turn to look at her and everyone remains silent for a minute. It's Marnie who breaks the quiet.

"Harvey, anything new?" She asks weakly with red and swollen eyes.

"No," he shakes his head. "We’re still waiting."

Marnie's face distorts into anguish. Instead of crying she clenches her fists and turns to Enny. 

"What happened Enny?" Her voice is quiet, but determined, ready to hear the ugly truth.

She already knows.

"I…,” she pauses. “What did they tell you?" She asks tentatively.

"I want to hear it from you." She locks onto Enny’s eyes. 

She definitely knows. Enny struggles to bring the words to life despite just shouting them at Harvey.

"Marmie," she starts. "I found him at the cliffs…he …" She looks down as tears stream down her face. "He was going to walk off them." She feels shame at the admission. She struggles to continue.

"They said you stopped him," Marnie’s voice shakes, giving away the fear she carries.

Enny nods her head silently and stares at her feet through tears. Marnie walks over to Enny and pulls her into a hug. The older woman buries her face into Ennys shoulder and sobs. Enny immediately grabs her back and lets the tears fall freely. They both hold each other and cry until dry sobs burn through Enny's throat.

Enny pulls away first, remembering that Harvey is there. Marnie follows her eyes to him before speaking. 

"Jas is with Penny until tonight." Then she looks to Enny. "I'll take over for now." Enny presses her lips together, ready to argue. But Marnie’s face tells her it’s not a suggestion. She reluctantly nods while staring at the door leading to Shane. 

"Okay. Tell me if he wakes up," she says in defeat. 

"Of course," Marnie responds.

"I'll be back tonight to take over." Enny picks up her bag and slowly walks to the door. She takes one last look at Marnie and Harvey before pushing herself through them.

The bright morning sun accosts her as she walks out. Enny hasn't left the clinic since bringing Shane in yesterday. Enny thinks about calling Leah, but doesn’t want to wake her if she's asleep. 

Don't lie to yourself. Enny’s still angry and wants an outlet for her rage. Leah will try to calm her down and force her to confront her feelings. She might be right to do so but Enny refuses to let go of these feelings. 

She lets her feet carry her home but instead of going inside she heads to the chest with her mining supplies. She dumps the contents of her bag into it and grabs her pickaxe and sword. 

She looks down at her clothes and sees they're filthy from the day before. She had been soaked and covered in mud that's now caked on. She doesn't bother changing, knowing the caves won't treat them any better. Enny collects her bag and practically sprints up the mountain path. The happy sounds of the birds and beautiful scenery fuel her anger. Every pleasantry she sees fills her with hatred. She clings to the anger and hostility. Under it, crippling sorrow waits to drown her. 

She hurries through the woods and races to the entrance of the mine. She runs to the elevator and smashes the button to take her down. She has only been here with Marlon since the accident, but they’ve only stayed near the surface levels. Enny doesn’t want that. She wants to feel the rage burn through her and inflict the kind of suffering she feels onto others. So she hits the button down to the 25th floor.

Each passing moment waiting in this rickety box of broken metal scratches at her under her skin. Impatience and frustration feed her fury. When the doors finally creak open, she explodes through them, sword drawn. She finds three nearby slimes and slashes through them mercilessly. A massive grayish pink bug flies at her from behind, but she turns and swings her sword, slicing it in half. She turns to look and finds no more monsters.

Luckily, the shaft down is still cleared from the last time she was here. She jumps down it, not even bothering to use the ladder. She is immediately met with a duggy at her feet and a rock crab crawling over to her. She thinks of the ones that attacked her and feels that familiar fear grip her. But she focuses on Marlon’s voice in her head and their training. Enny breathes deeply and finds the clear thread of anger running through her body, pushing her forward. She runs past the hole the duggy just appeared from, dragging her feet as bait to the greedy beast. It silently pops its head up and Enny quickly whips her sword through it, leaving a spurting bloody mess.

She then turns her attention to the crab crawling towards her. As it approaches, she swings her sword up under it, flipping it over onto its back. She lunges forward and drives her blade down into its exposed stomach, not stopping until she feels the rock shell of its back scrape against the tip of the blade. Only then does she pull it out, but it’s not enough. She drives the sword back into the beast's stomach. Then again and again while her memory is flooded by the needle like claws she watched slide into her stomach. 

She screams as the flailing legs go still but she doesn't stop. She continues to draw her sword out and slam it back in until there's nothing left but a blood splattered rock and a few remnants of the tissue that used to be there. Breathing hard, she looks around to see slimes surrounding her. She draws her blade and relentlessly swings at each one. They die quickly and easily, leaving Enny winded and covered in a thick layer of sickly green slime.

Realizing there are no more monsters, she once again finds the ladder down. She jumps and begins the next slaughter. She clears one floor after another until she reaches a chest on the 30th floor. Enny runs past it, eager to move further down into the depths, but stops. She gazes at her rusty and dented sword, then remembers the occasional weapon in those chests. She turns back towards it, quickly flipping the lid off. Inside, she finds a slender steel blade, free from any sort of damage. Enny throws her old training blade to the ground with a loud, shrill clank of the metal colliding with the stone.

Enny finds the next ladder leading down. She looks around but only sees a dim light a few feet in front of her. The rest of the cave is pitch black. She has reached the dark levels. If it is similar to her world, it will last about 10 levels before opening up to the ice caverns. She peers into the shadows only to be reminded of the desert caves when the creature stalked her from the dark. A sharp cracking sound from behind causes her to momentarily freeze. 

She closes her eyes and thinks of Shane. He's so fucking selfish. Her anger rises again. She thinks of this Sebastian. What a fucking joke. She lets the hatred consume her. As if she's being controlled, her arm swings the sword and sends the creature flying back. It contorts its body and brings itself back up to its disfigured form of broken stonelike bones, making a poor imitation of a human. 

She steadies herself before running the tip of her blade through its neck. Despite the rocky appearance, the blade slips through a crack, plunging deep into what she thinks is muscle. She twists the metal and brings the beast to its knees. She looks into its dimly, green lit eyes as she slices outward from its neck. Despite the dark, she watches clearly as the light flicker, leaving a lifeless hunk of black stone that crumbles to the ground.

"Come and fucking get me!" She screams into the black cavern. 

And they do. Three more tear themselves from the walls and stumble towards her. She swings at the legs of the nearest one, cutting one clean off. She lunges forward towards the second, ramming her sword into its chest. She pulls out her smaller blade and sinks it in the side of its neck. It falls limp, but Enny still twists the dagger as she removes her blades.

The third comes from behind and grabs her left arm. Its jagged, rocky fingers tear a chunk of skin from just above the elbow. Barely aware of her injury and numb to the pain, she spins around with both blades, slicing it horizontally at the neck and stomach. It lets out a gurgled screech before collapsing to the ground. She returns her attention to the one crawling towards her. She sheathes her knife and walks up to it slowly. 

"You're fucking pathetic," she spits as she hovers her sword over it's face. Enny slowly brings it down on its neck and listens to its broken screams as she sinks the metal through it. 

She can't stop. Enny continues her slaughter of each floor. She kills each creature with malicious hatred. They took her life and left her in torment. She doesn't even realize how far she's traveled until she comes to another empty floor with a chest. She runs past this one, filled with too much bloodlust to stop.

She drops down and her eyes sting at the sudden brightness of the cavern. The walls shine in white and hues of blue. Massive icicles shimmer from above her. The snow packed ground crunches under her feet, while rocks and ice form boulders throughout the floor. 

A fire burns within her at the sight of the first ice level. She always loved the beauty of these caves but now they fill her with disgust and rage. A glimmer catches her attention from a few feet in front of her. A frozen fucking tear. Her heart momentarily aches at the reminder of Sebastian, only to be replaced by a deadly fury. The anger quickly takes hold. She pulls her pickaxe out and slams it down on the gem, shattering it into a thousand pieces that glide swiftly and smoothly along the ground. 

Enny feels warmth running down her face, cutting through the chilled air. She brings her hand up to find she's crying. Pain floods into her arms and legs, each muscle screaming from overexertion. Stings from cuts and deeper aches from the dying’s desperate attempts at clinging to life. She tries to step forward and push past the pain, but falls to the ground. A heaviness rapidly forces her to the ground and her world fades to black. 

"Enny!" A voice shouts. Her shoulder suddenly shakes and she realizes Marlon is kneeling over her. She looks up at him, confused. “Are you okay?" He looks worried but not panicked. 

"Um," she pauses to think for a moment. Her body aches loudly but nothing fatal. "Yeah, I think so. Just a little beat up." She sits up and looks around the ice cavern. "What time is it?"

"It's almost 8." He eyes her tentatively, waiting to gauge her reaction.

"Shit," she mutters as she tries to stand. "I'm late getting back to Harvey's." 

Marlon reaches out for her arm and pulls her to her feet. 

"Try to go slow," he urges. "Your body gave out because you pushed it too hard. "

"What do you know?" She scoffs before realization dawns on her. "Wait. How did you know I was down here?"

"I followed you. You might have noticed if you weren't so…busy," he scolds. "You're lucky it was only me following you ."

"But I've been down here for hours.--"

"And so have I." She looks sheepishly at the ground to avoid his lingering glare. "I heard what happened. I figured you needed to be in here. I just didn't want you to get hurt so I stayed a floor above you. "

"You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to. I know what that kind of anger feels like. What it wants. What it's protecting." He looks away, staring off through the walls to something unseen. "I know what it costs." His hand grazes over his eye patch. 

A pain of understanding rings through Ennys chest. Isabelle…he's been here before, literally and metaphorically. She can't imagine the pain he felt after she died. It's the same pain she refuses to acknowledge that lives under the surface. I will go home. They are not lost to me. 

Enny looks up to Marlon's patch and wonders what happened. Maybe it was a rock crab. Maybe he went further to the depths. The unforgiving shadows down there are as cruel as they are deceptive. 

Marlon grabs her pack and the two walk silently to the elevator. Neither speaks the entire way back to the mouth of the cave but the unspoken words hang heavy over Enny. They step into the warmth of the night and Enny watches as Marlon walks with her towards the bridge. 

"What?" He asks with a smirk. "You didn't think I was going to let you walk back alone?"

"What makes you think you can let me do anything," she fires back.

He chuckles, while rolling his eye. “Let’s go.” And just like that, Enny falls into step with the seasoned hunter. The silence feels more comfortable than before. Enny lets her eyes wander to the sky, hoping to find a familiar planet. Sadly, the dying sun is still too bright to give up command over the sky. 

"Are the stars the same?" His question catches her off guard. 

"Yeah, I mean I'm no expert but I think so."

Enny jumps at a sudden rustling beside them. Marlon turns toward her slowly with his eyebrow raised. She looks to see Sebastian looking as surprised as her. His face quickly sours and he continues to walk past them without a word. Marlon face shows Enny he doesn't miss the hostility he carries for her.

"I've seen what you do in those caves and you're going to tell me you're scared by a local?" He chuckles. "What did you do to him?" He asks as they resume walking.

"I honestly don't know," she sighs. Enny knows she shouldn't care but it hurts her nonetheless. Those eyes have always been full of love and it's difficult to see how they glare at her so full of hatred. Her Sebastian or not, it's still painful.

"I'm sorry if I brought something up you don't want to talk about." Seriously, this man always knows what she's thinking.

"It's okay,” she hesitates to continue. "I actually was married to him, or am I mean, just the other one," she stammers. 

"Him?" He points where Sebastian disappeared behind them, raising his eyebrow.

"Yep, him." It feels good to say out loud. It's as if she needs to reassure herself of who she is. "And…..we have a daughter." A small smile tugs at her lips. 

Marlon stops and stares at her, mouth agape.

"A little you?!" His face lights up enthusiastically. He lets out a hearty laugh before continuing to walk. "I can imagine she's quite the handful." He smiles from ear to patch. 

"Yes," she laughs. "She really is. And of course she loves you. She's constantly trying to sneak away to go train."

"And do I? Train her I mean."

"She's 8!" Enny shouts through laughter. "Not that I can stop you two. I know you've been letting her use a wooden sword though. I keep catching her chasing after mice with it. "

"It sounds like you should have a talking to with my other self," he chuckles and Enny knows neither of them would listen to her. "What's the little demon's name?"

"Izzy," she smiles and looks up to Marlon's face before she continues. "Short for Isabelle."

He looks at her with the softness of a grandfather. He reminds her of her own grandpa and how he used to look at her with the same type of love. 

"Izzy is beautiful."

"You might be biased," she chuckles. 

"You might be right," he laughs right back before his face falls into something more solemn. 

"Don't give me that look." She side eyes him. "I don't want your pity. I'm going home." 

"Have you learned anything new?" He asks hesitantly.

"No." She looks at the ground. "But Ras is supposed to meet with his ominous sounding wizard council soon. He thinks they can help."

"Ah yes, the wizard council. He told me about them one night but he was drunk and I assumed crazy."

"Hold up." She grabs his arm. "He drinks?! Please tell me how you did it."

"I might be willing to bestow onto you my wisdom. If the price is right of course."

"How about Izzy stories?" She gives him a soft smile knowing he can't resist the temptation. 

“You seem to know my weakness."

Enny shares how Izzy loves foxes, exploring the secret woods, and playing with Marlon. Enny’s anger tempers, replaced by the warmth of her memories and love of this man. It’s the closest to home she's felt in months. She loves his soft and gentle side that completely overshadows his intimidating demeanor. And Izzy is his weakness. 

The walk feels too short as the clinic comes into view. The ease of Marlon’s company drains from her body only to be replaced with dread. She doesn't want to think about what happened or what might still happen. She just needs Shane to wake up.

"Hey." He looks at her with concern. "It's okay if you don't want to go in there," his voice gentle.

"I have to Marlon. " 

Of anyone in this town, he knows how she feels. The agonizing pain that feeds off her despair from seeing him in that bed, in tandem with the fiery anger that burns her soul at her own helplessness.

"I understand." He stops just outside the door. "I would tell you to get some sleep and take it easy, but I know you listen to no one."

She laughs and tears swell in her eyes. 

"Never have, never will."

He smiles.

"I expect nothing less."

"Goodnight Marlon."

"Goodnight Enny."

With that he turns back up to the path. Enny just watches for a minute. She loves this man. She can't deny the sense of safety and love she feels around him, both versions. Just another relationship she'll have to leave here. 

She turns back to the clinic doors and takes a deep breath before opening them. Inside, she looks around to see Leah and Elliott sitting on the other side of the room. Elliott sees her first and flashes a sympathetic smile. 

"Enny, it's good to see you." He gives her his undivided attention. He has a way of making you feel like the most important person in the room.

"Hey Elliott, hey Leah," she starts. "I'm sorry I'm so late. " She nervously rubs the back of her neck. 

"No worries," Leah speaks softly. "We figured you needed some rest and we're happy to help. "

"Thanks." Enny looks towards the back door. "Anything new?"

Leah shakes her head .

"Nothing yet. He's still asleep."

"I have no doubt Shane will make a full recovery," Elliott chimes in. 

"Yeah." Enny looks down, dejected as Leah elbows Elliott.

The three of them stay in the waiting room for hours. The conversation turns to the book Elliott has been working on. Leah talks about how close she is on her piece as well. It seems both of them are on creative surges. Eventually, Elliott is the first to leave. 

"I am afraid I must take my leave," he sighs. "I am meeting with my publisher early in the morning." He stands up. 

"Sounds good," Enny replies. "See you later."

As he leaves, Leah turns her attention to Enny.

"I see you didn't go home and sleep." She raises her eyebrow. 

"What gave me away," Enny chuckles

"Well, you're still in the same clothes and somehow you managed to get them even dirtier. And by the look of those fresh scratches, I'd say you were in the mines."

"Am I that easy to read?”

"Maybe not to everyone." She smirks. "But I like to think we've become pretty close. At least enough that I can tell when you're lying."

"We are pretty close.” She smiles to herself, thinking about the love she has grown into. “Closer than I am with most people." 

I'll hurt her when I leave too. I was supposed to just take care of the farm, but here I am building relationships. Her mind wanders to the missing Enny. Her current theory is she's still in this body and will re-emerge when Enny leaves. But what will she wake up to? Will she remember? 

Leah pulls her out of her thoughts by gently squeezing her hand. 

"Where did you go just now?"

"Seriously, get out of my head."

"You could just tell me. It would make it easier," she laughs.

"Fine. Like I told Shane. I'm an interdimensional traveler stuck in this world. I'm pretty sure I've taken over this body and was wondering if this Enny will remember these last couple of months." She runs her hand over her forehead and laughs desperately clinging to that thought.

Leah's serious expression tells Enny her confession was a poor choice.  

"I'm kidding. Obviously," she attempts to rescind her words.

"Right," Leah hesitates. "I'm worried about you."

"I know." Enny looks down. "I'll be okay. I promise. I just need some sleep."

"Let me stay tonight and you can go home."

"And miss out on these bad boys." Enny pats the uncomfortable chair that assaulted her back the night before.

"True luxury," Leah lets out a warm chuckle. "Alright. Really though. Let me know if you need me. For anything."

"I will. Now go home and get some sleep." Enny plasters the best smile she can to dissuade Leah’s worry.

"Oh definitely not." She smirks. "I've got my work waiting for me and Emily will be off soon."

"Ooh, get it Leah!" She winks and Leah instantly turns beet red.

"Shut up," is all she manages to get out. 

"Nice comeback."

Both women share a brief chuckle as Leah stands up. 

"Alright, let me know if anything changes. Otherwise I'll see you tomorrow."

"Will do. Get home safe. Don't get eaten by any bears."

"I'll try," she laughs as she walks out the door. Leah presents strength and composure, but Enny sees the cracks in her demeanor as well. She’s worried, but trying to stay strong. Maybe for Enny’s sake. Maybe for her own. Leah doesn’t seem like the type to stop long enough to dwell on the hurt, opting to keep herself busy instead. Enny can relate.

Enny's thoughts quickly sour as her anxiety builds. The back doors open and Harvey appears with a pillow and blanket. 

"Here." He hands them to her. "Those chairs aren't the most comfortable."

The dark circles under his eyes tell her how tired he is. Enny remembers how she treated him this morning and feels a wave of guilt. 

"Thanks." She takes them from him. "And I'm sorry.” She looks down at the bedding. “I was an asshole this morning and you didn't deserve that. I shouldn't have taken out my frustration on you. I know you've done everything you can and then some."

"Don't worry about it." He gives her a weak smile. "I'm sorry I can't do more."

"Are you seriously apologizing to me after how I acted?" She laughs. "That's dumb."

"Yeah." She gets a small chuckle from him. "It's pretty bad when you say it out loud."

"Seriously though. I'm sorry. You're a great doctor and friend. You saved Shane's life."

"You saved his life," he emphasizes. "And did you just call me your friend?" He smirks. 

"It was a slip. It meant nothing."

"If you say so." A small smile tugs at the corner of his lip.

"Ughhhhh,” she groans. “This is going to be a whole thing now isn't it?" Harvey merely chuckles in response.

"Can I get you anything before I head upstairs?"

"No, I'm alright. Thanks though." Enny turns toward the chair to set up her makeshift bed.

"It's the least I can do." He turns to walk away. "Come get me if you need anything."

"I will. Thanks Harvey."

He nods and disappears through the door. Enny lays her head on the pillow and immediately falls asleep.

Chapter Text

Shane can't move. He can't even feel his body, but he thinks his eyes are open. He hears something but it sounds far away, like he's underwater. He wills his eyes to look around, but only sees a faint gray glow around him. T hen everything fades to black and the world feels empty. There are no sounds, no lights, nothing but an eternal abyss. He does not exist here but he knows this is where he belongs. He doesn't know how much time passes, or if time even exists here. He feels content to disappear into oblivion until a voice pierces the deafening silence. 

“Please Shane, don't leave.”

Who is that? Why do they sound so worried? Don’t they know how much pain he was in? Why would he ever leave? Still, something about the voice lingers. The silence returns but the willingness to fade does not. He feels drawn back to the echo etched in his memory, despite his comfort in this space. He feels something warm and realizes it's coming from within him. Some part of him still exists and it is growing.  He panics at the thought of leaving this place but that voice demands his return. His developing body is torn between the two. He feels no pain here, he feels nothing. But he somehow knows if he follows that voice he will endure endless torment.  He lets the abyss lay claim to him once again. His body evaporates and the nothing takes over once again.

“Shane. Come back to us,” another voice sings a tune he doesn’t want to hear. 

It shatters his peace and burns through his body. He has a body. He reaches out but feels nothing, sees nothing. He tries to call out to it but has no voice. He resigns himself back to the oblivion, the nothingness. Suddenly, a face flashes in front of him. It's only a moment but he knows her. He knows the black hair framing her face. He calls out again and this time a muffled sound escapes his lips. The face appears again, longer.

Stella.

He reaches for her, but the image stretches away from him. Shane pulls himself forward, hearing her voice echo in the distance. 

The first thing Shane registers is a faint beep echoing through the room. It pulls him from the darkness as his ears cling to the sound. Then, he slowly peels his eyes open and is met with an abrasive bright light from every direction. The next is the pain. His head feels like it's cracked open. A splitting pain pierces his entire head, down into his neck. He moves his fingers and his muscles scream in retaliation. He gasps and chokes on the object in his mouth. Panic fills his chest and he begins to thrash weakly. He tries to scream out, to move, to do anything, but he is trapped. He hears a voice call to him. It's lower and commanding, telling him to calm down. How can I possibly calm down? His eyes become heavy and the world fades to black.

The next time his eyes open, his head is groggy but his chest feels lighter. 

"Shane?" It's that voice again. "Shane, can you hear me?" Yes . He tries to say but his voice won't cooperate. Instead he nods his head. "That's good," the voice sounds relieved. Shane tries to sit up but falls back down. "Don't try to move just yet. You're safe here. You're in the clinic and Marnie is here. "

"Shane, I'm right here sweetie. Can you hear me?" He nods again. Why does everyone keep asking if he can hear them? Why does my head feel so foggy? Why does it seem like I should know them? "Harvey, he seems confused. Is this normal.?" She sounds scared. 

"I have to run some more tests. But he's awake and that's good. It's completely normal for it to take time…." that voice again. But it trails off. Marnie. Harvey. Why do those names sound so familiar? He falls back into himself and into the depths of the dark. The next time he wakes up, he can see more clearly. The room is dimly lit with no windows. He sees his feet at the end of the bed, covered with a white blanket. He follows them up to his waist and arms. Something is sticking out from his left hand. He reaches for it with his right but a voice stops him. "That's your IV. You definitely don't want to pull it out." What a calming voice.

"Ha-Harvey?"

"That's right Shane. It's me Harvey and you're in the clinic." The clinic. He's been here before. "What else do you remember?"

"I, I don't know." He searches for anything but his mind is blank. 

"That's normal," he pauses to give him a moment. "Marnie's here with me."

"Shane sweetie, I'm right here."

He turns and sees the brunette woman with red eyes. She's crying but he remembers her. 

"Do you know who I am?"

"Yeah,” he rasps. “Where’s…Stella?" Each word scrapes at his throat.

Harvey and Marnie share a look of confusion and fear.

“Shane,” Marnie lets out a pained sound. “They….” she stops, unable to continue.

"You were in an accident Shane," Harvey steps in. “You're okay but you have a concussion."

"It hurts."

"The pain will get better,” he comforts, but his pinched eyebrows behind his glasses give away his concern. “Do you remember what happened?”

“No.” He attempts to shake his head, but the small movement tears through his neck and head. “Wait,” he pauses, searching his memory. “I was with Stella and Derick last night. Then the police came.” Fear builds in his chest. “Where are they?” He pushes himself up, ignoring the pain shooting through his body.

“Shane, you need to relax.” Harvey places his hands on Shane’s shoulders to prevent him from moving.

“Where are they?” His voice burns with fear and anxiety. “WHERE AR–” suddenly the memories rush back to him, flooding his mind. The night at the bar. The police. Marnie. Jas. The guilt. Then something else. Something he only heard of once before. He closes his eyes, concentrating on the lost memory. “Marnie,” his voice cracks. “They’re dead.” Her glossy eyes confirm the truth, but that’s not what his mind is reaching out to. “Who were the people in the other car? What happened to them?”

Enny makes her way out of the decrepit old elevator. Honestly, how does this not fall apart? She spent the last 4 days in the mines. She collected some good ore but mostly she's been clearing the floors. Mostly massacring any creature unfortunate enough to cross her. She's cleared 40 floors since Shane's been in a coma. She's largely ignored her farm, only feeding the animals, and has spent every day in the mines. Marlon hasn't followed her down again but checks on her periodically. The doors of the elevator screech open.

"Hey kiddo," Marlon greets her. "You done for the day?"

"Yep, I have to get down to the clinic to take over for Marnie." She's spent every night there waiting for Shane to wake up. "I just want to stop at home to get changed."

"Alright then, I'll leave you to it. I just wanted to make sure you made it out okay. "

"Thanks Marlon. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you then."

They part ways at the entrance with Enny heading towards the bridge. She walks across and sees a faint glow through the trees. Someone's smoking. She knows who. She hasn't seen him in a few days which makes it easier to be here. She picks up her pace and sticks to the beach, hoping to avoid Sebastian. The trail pops her out right in front of his house. She thinks she's made it in time until she hears a branch break behind her. Enny's shoulders immediately tense up and she slowly turns around.

"Why are you always here?" He asks bitterly. 

"I, um..." she struggles to find the right words. ’Sorry Seb, I have to find a creepy ass bone carved into the shape of a key so I can go home to you.’

"Um what? Can't you even speak?" The hostility in his words cuts through her.

"I'm sorry," she sighs. "I'm just mining for ore. I need it for my farm."

"What do you need ore for?" He scowls.

"For lots of shit okay?" Her body tenses, preparing itself for a fight. "I need it to build my coops and barns. I need it to make better tools." Her voice gets louder. "I use it to make extra cash and blow off steam." 

"Blow off steam?" He spits the words out. "So you just go in there like an idiot to throw yourself at those things again? Do you want to end up back in the hospital with your boyfriend?"

"Shane is not my boyfriend you fucking idiot!" She shouts. "And why does it even matter? Who the fuck do you think you are criticizing me for what I do?*

"That makes sense," he scoffs with a roll of his eyes.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" She demands, unable to hold back her frustration.

"Oh you didn't hear? I guess you're not that close after all. He woke up and said he didn’t want anything to do with you.” He flaunts his knowledge over her with condescension in his tone. “What did you do, Enny?” He takes a small step towards her, as though he wants to ensure she hears every word. “Did you reject him? Make him feel small? Drive him to that cliff?”

By the time she can comprehend what he's said, her hand flies from her body on its own accord. The impact across his left cheek vibrates up her arm. He stumbles backwards and with wide eyes cups his face. Fear fills his eyes but Enny doesn't care. How could I ever think he was anything like the man I love?  Pain pulses along the bones of her hand and she realizes what she's just done. A thread of disgust cuts through her rapidly beating heart, but the anger is stronger. A part of her wants to break his face, to make sure he never utters a single word again.

Enny quickly turns away and runs down the path, leaving a still shocked Sebastian standing alone in the dark.

Sebastian stands by the lake near the entrance to the mines. He checks his time and finds it's already 2am. He's worried because Enny hasn't come up yet. Their post cave activities have become more frequent since the night of the jellies. She usually stops by Robin’s to ask about an upgrade or will be extra loud going in if he's by the lake. Maybe he's overthinking it, but he believes he's doing it to tell him she'll be there. Of course, he happily obliges her indirect invitation.  Except she's usually out by now. The latest it's ever been was just before 1am. He feels a pit form in his stomach. He's worried about her. He knows she's very capable, but even the veteran Marlon lost an eye down there after years of adventuring. Maybe I should check on her, he thinks. He steps through the threshold of the cave and walks over to the elevator wondering how she trusts this thing. Just as he's about to hit the call button, the elevator comes to a grinding halt and the doors screech open. Enny sits motionless against the furthest wall. 

"Enny!" Sebastian shouts while rushing in. "Enny, are you okay?!"

She lifts her head slightly and slowly opens her eyes part way. 

"Seb?" Her voice is soft and weak. "What are you doing here?"  She can barely meet his eyes. He looks her over and sees a lot of blood but he can't tell where it's coming from. 

"Where are you hurt?" He asks in a panic. 

"Oh, I'm okay really." She smiles weakly. "Just exhausted." Her eyes begin to close.

"Enny you're barely conscious. You need to see Harvey." Panic washes over him.

"I'm fine. Just over did it a little."

"A little?!" He shouts exacerbated. "Can you stand?"

"Yeah, but I'm just gonna sit for a minute." 

"Enny!" She opens her eyes. "We're going to Harvey's. I'm going to pick you up okay?"

"Yeah, okay," she finally concedes. “But I can walk." He positions his shoulder under hers and reaches his arm around her back. He braces himself while he pulls her to her feet. She groans in response. 

"Hey," he can't keep the worry from his voice. "Are you okay?" Her body is practically limp but she manages to keep her feet on the ground.

"Yeah, I'm good, but maybe just a minute?"

"Enny you're not okay. I'm going to lift you up and carry you, okay?" She just nods. In one swift movement, he slides his free arm under her knees and swoops her into his arms. He carries her with ease out of the elevator and through the entrance. Her eyes start to close again as they cross the bridge. 

"Hey, stay with me." He tries to conceal his worry. Her eyes barely flutter open. "Talk to me."

"About what?" Her voice comes out almost as a whisper.

"Well, you can start with what happened in the mines."

"Oh, I just pushed myself a little too hard."

"Why? What's so important down there?"

"Ore mostly. I need it for my farm."

"Mostly? What else?"

"Oh, um," she hesitates. "I like to blow off steam sometimes."

"Seriously?" His voice comes out irritated. "You did this to yourself because you had a bad day?"

"It sounds bad when you say it like that. If it helps, it was a really bad day."

"It doesn't, but tell me what happened."

"I lost an entire harvest of pumpkins to crows." Her eyes start to close again.

"Hey," he shouts. "Then what?"

"Oh," she comes back to. "One of my chickens died. It got left outside and something attacked it." He sees tears slowly trail down her face through the blood.

"It was my fault. I didn't get her in last night."

"I'm sorry." 

He doesn't know what else to say. They've talked more and more lately in addition to their adult activities. He knows how much those animals mean to her and can’t imagine her pain. He gently kisses the top of her head as they continue their trek down the mountain. He hears quiet sniffles and it pains him. 

"I like frogs."

"What?" She blinks at him in confusion. 

"Yeah, I just always liked frogs. They come out in the rain."

"That's…" she holds back a giggle. “Adorable."

"I prefer sexy." A smile tugs at his lips.

"Mm," she hums, "Sebastian, my sexy frog lover."

"Yours huh?" Her words send warmth throughout his body. Even in the dark, he can see her face redden from ear to ear. 

"I didn't mean it like that," she blurts out. 

"Sure you didn't," he winks. "But if you did, that's okay too. I get the feeling you aren't going to remember much from tonight."

"You don't know. I might remember it all," she slurs. 

"Heh," he chuckles, "I highly doubt that."

"Should I worry about you taking advantage of me?" She raises her eyebrow while closing her eyes again."

"I'd rather do that consensually. Open your eyes."

"They are open." She keeps them closed.

"Then how many fingers am I holding up?"

"Three," she says without hesitation. 

"Trick question! Both of my hands are holding you."

"That's not fair," she whines.

"What are you going to do about it, sweetheart?"

That gets her eyes open.

"Did you just call me sweetheart," she pinches her eyebrows together in irritation. 

"I'm sorry little bunny. I'm just calling you what you are, all cute and adorable."

"No," she asserts, "I'm fucking fierce and scary like a snow leopard."

"A snow leopard?" He laughs. "That's an oddly specific animal."

"They're my favorites okay?"

"Yeah yeah, okay my little snow kitty."

"I'm going to punch you one day."

"I have no doubt."

Sebastian wakes up to a pain in his back in addition to the usual head pain. He's slouched over his keyboard and his back aches in retaliation. He looks at the clock and sees it's a little past 9pm. He pulls himself up and reaches for his phone. No messages as usual lately. Abby is still avoiding him and Sam has been distancing himself as well. Alright, that might be more of Sebastian shutting down contact rather than Sam. He looks at his computer to see a line of gibberish run across his code. Fuck . This will take all night to fix. He rubs his head and decides he needs a cigarette to clear his head. He grabs his hoodie then heads towards the stairs. He takes a few steps before hearing voices coming from upstairs. 

"She really said that?" His mother asks. 

"Yeah mom, it was really weird. They've been so close. I don't understand why he wouldn't want to see her. Especially after she saved his life," Maru says. Are they talking about Shane and Enny? No one really knew what happened, just that Enny had found him. Maru hasn't talked about it either and her face always turned into something somber when it came up. He’s also caught her staring at him more in the last few days. 

"That could be why." His mom pauses. "If it was on purpose and she stopped him, he might feel embarrassed to see her, or even angry with her."

Sebastian feels the blood drain from his face, leaving it cold and hollow. He tried to kill himself? No. That can't be what happened. He knew Shane had some problems and probably depression but was he really suicidal? His weight shifts lightly and the floor board under his foot creaks. Shit . It becomes deadly silent upstairs.

"Sebby," his mom tentatively calls. "Is that you?"

"Yeah," he sighs. "It's me." He walks up the stairs to find his mom and Maru both looking guilty. Maru is staring at the floor giving everything away. He really did try to kill himself. "Is it true?" He asks with a weak voice. Neither respond. "So it is. And you don't want to tell me because why? Because you think it's contagious? Or that I'm too fragile to hear the truth. 

"Sebby," Robin reaches out for him. "It's not like that." He pulls away as her hands grab his. 

"Sure. Whatever you say." Sebastian storms out of the cabin and towards the lake. He hates how crazy he feels. He's jealous over Shane's relationship with Enny and feels worthless to her. How can she choose to be with that broken excuse of a person but she throws him away like he's nothing?

What am I even thinking? She owes nothing to me. What does it matter who she dates? He's lying to himself, he knows. He can't stop these dreams or the fake feelings they're creating. He tries to fight them and fails everyday. He's out of control and it's tearing him apart. All Sebastian wants is to get her out of his head. He would give anything for peace again, or at least his passive depression instead of this open hostility. Maybe her being with Shane will help him get over this. Maybe it'll drive him mad. Sebastian stares over the lake as he pulls his lighter from his pocket. He flicks it and brings the flame to his cigarette. He takes a long drag just to feel it burn his throat and lungs. He's addicted to the pain he deserves.

He looks at the dark water under the full moon and wonders why Shane did it. He thinks about his own attempt and he can't think of any real reason. Sure, his home life sucks, but why then? What sparked it? Was it the same for Shane? Even Sebastian knew how much Shane and Enny get along. He doesn't think he's ever seen Shane resemble any sort of happiness, but he seemed so much lighter and carefree around her. If things had been going better, why do it now? Sebastian would be lying if he said he doesn't still think about it. He can't tell anyone, but his mind aimlessly wanders to suicide most days. Sometimes he's at the lake like right now, and he wonders if he could let himself sink to the bottom. Other times it's a passing thought about walking in front of a train or throwing himself down the canyon on the other side of the mines. But day after day, he suffers through his thoughts and desires. He just wants this pain to end. He closes his eyes and tilts his head up to the sky. He feels a gentle breeze brush against him. That's why he did it. The pain was greater than any reason he had to live.

He finishes his cigarette and turns back to the path. As the cabin comes into view, so does she. He steps on a branch, breaking it. Fuck . Maybe she didn't hear me . She stops and turns her head. Fuck.

“Why are you always here?" Just the sight of her burns through his chest.

"I, um.." 

"Um what? Can't you even speak." He swallows the urge to scream at her.

"I'm sorry." She sighs. "I'm just mining for ore. I need it for my farm."

"What do you need ore for?" His dream flickers through his mind.

"For lots of shit okay?" Frustration slips through her voice. "I need it to build my coops and barns. I need it to make better tools." Her voice gets louder. "I use it to make extra cash and blow off steam. " 

"Blow off steam?" He clenches his jaw. "So you just go in there like an idiot to throw yourself at those things again? Do you want to end up back in the hospital with your boyfriend?" Why is she so fucking stupid?

"Shane is not my boyfriend you fucking idiot!" A wave of relief momentarily washes over him. "And why does it even matter? Who the fuck do you think you are criticizing me for what I do?”

"That makes sense," he can't stand how she talks about him. How she defends whatever is between them. How much he wishes it were him she was talking about.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" She demands. 

"Oh you didn't hear? I guess you're not that close after all. He woke up and said he didn’t want anything to do with you.” He hates how good the sinister smile spreading across his face feels. “What did you do, Enny?” He takes a small step towards her, driving in his words. “Did you reject him? Make him feel small? Drive him to that cliff?”

She moves quickly and the sudden proximity makes his heart race. Suddenly, she throws a punch across his face, sending a rush of pain through his jaw. She stares at him seething, like she wants to kill him. After what feels like an eternity, she collects herself enough to turn and run towards town. Sebastian can't bring himself to move, too many thoughts and feelings flood his brain. He feels like an asshole, but he's still angry. His jealousy and comfort over the way she spoke about Shane wage an internal war. But mostly, his heart hurts from the look on her face and that he was the reason it was there.

He falls to his knees and stares up at the sky. Everything hurts too much.

Chapter Text

Enny groggily wakes up, uncertain of her surroundings. It's bright and definitely not her bed. She looks around, immediately recognizing the harsh fluorescent lights and sterile smell of antiseptic. Her stomach involuntarily twists at the sights and smells of the room. Memories flash through her mind of being carted into the hospital in between lapses of consciousness. The helplessness of being unable to lift herself out of her hospital bed. Even when they told her that her brother died, all Enny could do was cry and convulse in pain. She wanted to see him. To leave that place.To leave everything. Instead, she was forced to endure the inescapable pain of her soul being shredded into pieces. The only person capable of understanding the complexities of her heart, laid on a cold bed somewhere in this hospital that quickly became her prison.

Enny returns to this room, this hospital where the stagnant air greedily sucks out the breath from her lungs. Her breathing quickens in response, trying to steal small puffs back from the room. Her eyes frantically dart across barren walls until she sees a familiar black mop by her side. He's hunched over the edge of the bed with his hand in hers. Even asleep, this man is adorable. Her body relaxes slightly, only to be interrupted by a gentle, but irritated voice.

"He's been here all night," Harvey says quietly from her other side. He jots something down on his clipboard, never bringing his eyes to hers.

"All night?" She blinks, trying to wake herself up more. "What time is it?" 

"6am. You're lucky he found you. He said you passed out in the mines."

"Oh." She thinks back to the night before. "I, um, stayed a little too long down there."

"Clearly," he's short. "You were covered in a lot of blood, but surprisingly very little was yours."

"I'm sorry.” She hates relying on others for anything.

"It's fine. I'm glad you're okay." He motions to Sebastian while keeping his eyes glued to his chart. "Whenever he gets up, you are free to go." He walks toward the door 

"Yeah? Awesome." She lights up, ready to leave this place.

"One last thing." He turns to finally look at her. "I'll send you my bill in the mail."

He disappears before Enny can respond.

"Mother fucker," she mumbles.

Enny wakes up to light creeping in through the windows. She's spent the last 3 nights back at home and hates every moment of it. Despite her bed being an infinite amount of times more comfortable than the clinic chairs, she's been plagued with panic attacks and near constant anxiety.

The evenings are the worst, so she tries to stay in the mines until she's close to passing out. She doesn't understand why she can’t see him. That night at the clinic, Marnie was the one to tell her. Enny is happy Shane is awake but distraught that he doesn’t want her around. Marnie didn’t understand either, but the apprehension in her eyes told Enny there was more to the story.

If she’s not staving off an anxiety attack about Shane, her mind wanders to Sebastian. She can't believe she hit him. Her stomach agrees as it churns in disgust, attempting to force bile up into her throat. Still, she's livid about what he said. Maybe he's right . 

Enny physically shakes the thought out of her head and pulls herself out of bed to prepare for another tortuous day of distracting herself from her own spiraling thoughts. She's been mildly tending to her crops again and feels stupid for how far she fell behind. But her more recent injuries are making her work more difficult.

She grabs her bag and opens the door to find the very person who's been avoiding her. 

"Um hey," he looks at the porch, avoiding eye contact. Enny just stands there frozen in disbelief, not sure if she can trust her eyes. "I, uh, wanted to come by–"

"You fucking asshole," she screams, unable to hold back her emotions. "You avoid me for 3 fucking days then just show up." 

"I'm sorry," his voice cracks as he puts his hands up. "I'm sorry. Just let me explain."

"Explain what?" She yells. "How you scared the shit out of me? How I thought you were going to die? How scared I was every single day for the last week only for you to shut me out? What can you possibly say?"

"I killed your brother!" He shouts. Enny blinks in confusion.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" She scoffs. 

“The car that hit him.” He rubs the back of his neck nervously. “That hit you . It was Stella and Derick.”

She searches her memories from that night. Enny never asked about the other car. It didn’t matter because in Enny’s mind, it was her fault. She killed her brother.

“I don’t understand,” she starts, trying to sort out the whirl of emotions flooding through her. “That doesn’t make sense. H-How–What? I don’t get it.” She squeezes her eyes shut, trying to grasp onto any sort of reason. 

“It’s my fault,” Shane says resolutely. “I did it.” Enny opens her eyes to see him clenching his jaw, tears welling in his eyes. “They were in that car because of me. I pushed them to drink more,” his voice shakes. “They wrecked because of me. They’re dead because of me,” his voice rises. “Your brother is dead because of me!” He shouts, not at her, but at something less tangible. “Jas is alone because of me!” His conviction breaks into a sob as he drops to his knees. “It’s all because of me,” his voice falls to barely above a whisper.

A wall crashes into Enny full of hurt, guilt, anger, frustration, but above all else, worry. Worry for this broken man falling to pieces at her feet. He’s carried this for years, just as she has. They both sought penance for their atrocities, the same atrocity. They both held themselves responsible for that night. Shane drank, driving himself to attempt suicide. Enny ran, leaving everything she’s known behind to hide from her shame. 

Enny slowly kneels to the ground in front of him. Shane looks up, his face twisted in agony and streaked with tears.

"You stupid fucking idiot." She pulls him into a hug. "I just want you to be okay," she chokes out.

"I'm so sorry, for all of it " he says, failing to hold back the cries. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I killed them. I killed all of them.”

“Please stop,” she begs, feeling her own tears burn down her cheeks. “It’s not your fault!”

“Yes it is,” he sobs, having lost all restraint and control over his emotions. 

“Shut up!” She chokes out. “No it’s not.”

“How can you say that?” He asks while pulling back enough to look at her face. Enny sees pain, but something else, something he’s denied himself for years.

“Because I’ve always blamed myself,” she whispers in defeat, acknowledging outloud of how she’s felt for years. “He shouldn’t have been there. He came to get me from work because I was selfish. I put him in that car.”

“And I put them in theirs,” he desperately clings to his guilt. “You didn’t do that.”

“No,” she says coldly. “You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to take all the blame,” she clenches her jaw, reluctant to give it to him.

“That’s stupid!” He shouts. “It’s not your fault! It–”

“And it’s not yours!” She cuts him off. She stares at him, feeling her anger and resolve crumble. 

Enny is looking for the same thing as Shane. Absolution. Neither speaks for a moment that stretches long enough for the tears to dry and anger to diminish. Until all that’s left is the shared pain between them.

It’s Enny who finally breaks the silence.

“You’re an idiot,” she says with an eye roll, eliciting an exacerbated chuckle from Shane.

“I know,” his voice is raw.