Archive of Our Own ^beta

"Hey Lee! Last night was amazing, btw I was wondering if u'd be down for lunch? 1:00 PM or whenever ur free. Hmu"

She watched it send, heart dropping into her stomach when an automated message had responded in place of Lena. This hadn't happened before why was it happening now all of a sudden? The blonde looked on bemused as the message refused to go through, receiving the same text over and over.

"The person you are trying to reach is not taking messages at this moment. Please try again later."

Blue eyes flickered between the two messages before her thumb hit the home button, swiping towards Instagram where she found her chat with Lena; clicking on it Kara's stomach dropped at the few words on the bottom of the screen, she read them back to herself in a watery voice.

"You are blocked.."

It was barey above a whisper, cracked and breathy as she sunk into the side of the couch, tears streaking a pretty face with salty trails and reddened skin underneath them. Kara took in one more hiccuping breath before it fell into a coughed sob while she replayed everything that happened last night, going over every little detail in her head. Did she do something to unnerve Lena the night before? Scare her off with her strength? Did she find out about her identity? Her head was swimming with thoughts on how she could've messed up, a notification popped up on her side bar drawing her attention from the absolute crying, snotty, mess she currently was. 

"You're.. Late for work.."

Kara's mouth was left agape for a moment before everything came crashing down, she buried her face into her sleeves and threw her phone off to the side. Why should she bother coming into work when nothing was going according to plan already? She'd think over everything, horrible idea when blue eyes were already swollen, puffy, and red from crying; it seemed to only worsen the affect of irritated skin. The blonde hiccuped on her breaths as the room drew too warm and stuffy for her, eyes shut tight and harshly buried into her couch cushions.

By the time she'd stopped crying, the sun seemed to be lowering on the horizon, her sobs nothing more than a sniffled hiccup. Rapid knocking caught the kryptonian's attention, unsteady legs carried her towards the door; her eyes ached too much to bother using x-ray vision to see who it was before hand, she glanced up locking eyes with the one person she didn't want to see but ached to hear from. Lena Luthor.

She could've sworn a flash of guilt filled those mismatched green eyes before a projection of cold harsh steel filled over it, Lena stared down at her like she was some pathetic little creature that she'd kick away if it bothered her.

"Kara."

It was bitter, collected, and stern towards the young woman before her. Almost as if Lena had trained herself to act this way towards people like Kara, people who made her feel weak. Brown hair was neatly drawn in a bun, she glanced past the kryptonian before releasing a heavy sigh that seemed almost weight with unbearable emotional package.

"I'm not gay. Last night was a mistake, a fluke, a drunken decision. I would appreciate if we do not talk of it nor discuss it, we will remain work colleagues and that is all. We will not be having any friendly visits nor hold each other's social medias."

The tone of her voice startled something in the blonde, it snapped inside of her as fresh tears flooded down Kara's cheeks but it wasn't a frown taking place on her lips. It was a sneer. A harsh, teary eyed, lip quivering sneer at the woman above her, the woman she spent hours crying over, the woman she's loved since she received that first hug, the woman she was willing to get herself killed for protecting. Her best friend. The woman she spent a night with and gave herself over to, and this is how she was treated? Like some little pet dog who needed to be told no.

Kara wasn't going to stand for it, her eyes squeezed tightly as she stormed off from the door. Glancing back her eyes held something unsettling, it startled the CEO behind her, the girl who she believed to be all sunshine and glitter held an angry storm in pretty, blue, tear swollen eyes.

"You're not gay? Is that the best excuse you have for abandoning me? That you're not gay? I expected more from you Lena but I mean... Afterall you are a Luthor. I shouldn't have had too high of expectation with someone from your background, my fault. You can go ahead and keep me blocked if you'd like, I mean... You're not gay so why would we ever talk again? You can't be associated with someone like me!"

It came out a near scream, the brunette behind her holding a hand to her close chest in surprise and bewilderment. She'd no idea Kara could act like this, and it hurt to see, hurt to know that she was the one who made the blonde finally snap, hurt that there was nothing she could do to fix it less she ruin her reputation and put her family to more shame than it already is.

Lena sighed, defeated and quiet as she entered the apartment; her hands hesitant as she pushed Kara to sit down on the couch and bend in front of her. A soft shake of her head with the tiniest of chuckles left the brunette above her, the blonde winced at the sound before a harsh reddening slap connected with her face; her head turned with the force of it.. It hurt. It wasn't supposed to hurt. Teary eyes searched the woman above her before snotty sobs and an achy throat set in, eyes falling wider when she noticed a ring glowing bright green on Lena's hand. How could she not have noticed it?

A sniffly startled cry out sent the Luthor backing away, glancing down at the blonde before her with a distasteful glare.

"You will not talk down to me like I'm some little friend of your's Kara. We are not friends, not anymore. Goodbye, I hope to god for your own sake that the only time you reach out to me will be for an interview or an apology."

With that the sound of angry heels left her apartment, door slammed shut with a loud thudding shut. Kara would've flinched had it not been for the ringing in her ears and thudding in the reddened hand on her cheek, eyes closing tightly after a blanket was placed over her face.

A saddened smile taking over the unamused crying, before it became a surprised, wet, bitter cackled into her hands. It dissolved into a wailing cry that startled her neighbours more than likely if the constant rapping knuckles and worried voices at her door were anything to discern by, Kara just continued her inconsistent weeping as the moon rose high.

"She's not gay... She's not... She just... Last night we..."

The blonde could find no good reasoning for what went down. Alex was sitting by her on the couch, a disappointed glance landing on her little sister's heaving form . Having stopped by at the insistence of Lena who was worried she let impulse control her actions with Kara, the older woman was beyond pissed at the CEO for what she'd done; there wasn't much she could do she'd reason with herself as bitter thoughts filled her head, hand absent mindedly running through blonde curls and brushing them off to the side so the blonde wouldn't suffocate in a mess of wet strands.

"Kara... Not every relationship is going to file out how you want it to. Lena has issues to deal with, it's not your fault she used you to try and cope with them..."

Maggie was rushing around in the background, working on making tea more than likely. She'd been trying to help out as much as she could around the apartment when she'd arrived with Alex, quickly figuring out that tea was helping to bring Kara's mood up she kept a steady supply coming while also manning some goofy cartoons for the young woman.

"Autumn comes when you're not yet done with the summer passing by, baby danvers..."

Was all the police officer muttered, placing a cup of hot green tea in front of the blonde and squeezing at her shoulder. A quick kiss was placed to her girlfriend's head as she sat down alongside them, Kara laying her legs over Maggie's lap and head on Alex's. A new pair of hands joined, gently patting at her legs over the covers in silent reassurance: the blonde met the attempt with a half hearted sniffle, eyes drowsy and aching as fatigue set in. Exhaustion taking over her body like a threshold and seeping through her entire being.

Blue eyes fought to stay awake as her forehead brushed over the lap of her older sister, Alex having grown used to the pattern over the years of being with Kara began scratching at her cheek lightly to help the kryptonian's comfort scent wash over her. One Kara strictly only used for her sister due to the fact it was trained to smell like their earlier years, when Kara would climb up in bed beside her after a nightmare and snuggle into her big sister while crying broken kryptonian. The thoughts were a pleasant memory, much more pleasant than watching the little goddess's body sag into a shaky tearful mess, as sleep overcame her.

Who knows. Maybe it'll be better in the morning, kara thought in her head as sleep flooded her thoughts.

"Or who knows.. Maybe I'll just hang myself like I tried to in highschool before I realized rope doesn't work on me.."

It caught Alex and Maggie both off guard, she'd known of Kara's past tendencies after the loss of her family, unable to cope she turned to something she thought would help, Alex had tried to help her through it of course. Seeing it resurface made the red haired woman sick to her stomach, Maggie could guess by all the scars along the blonde's sides and legs that seemed like slices and jagged cuts that this had been a problem in the past. Her head fell to Alex's shoulder, thumbs kneading and massaging at Kara's calf as a soft relaxation method.

"I miss her more than anything.."
It was whispered as sleep found her, no more worries, no more tears, just her holding onto the life they could've had in her dreams..