Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Chapter 1: A Gentle Tug

Through desires we understand a strong feeling of wanting something, that is usually described as nice to have or expected of us. Needs are desires that our mind decided must be gratified.

Desire is something we want for ourselves. Needs are basic and must be met for our survival.

Belly let herself drift to the bottom of the pool. She had been trying and failing to sort through her thoughts and feelings but there was something about swimming that helped her to feel more grounded and settled. The water rushed into her ears, muffling the world around her, and cooling her flushed skin. 

Belly held her breath and began to try to think calmly - something she had been sorely unable to do in the past few days. Honestly it was all Jeremiah’s fault - she thought to herself, her mouth twisting into a reluctant smile - the combination of proximity and almost privacy was driving her to distraction.

She recalled how as soon as volleyball camp had finished four days ago, she had started begging and cajoling her mother to head back to Cousins. It wasn’t just a matter of getting back to her happy place, it was that ever since Jere had left her at camp, she had felt like there was a string tied tightly to some vital part of her, tucked up inside her ribcage, tugging her toward him. The tension had left her unable to sleep and on edge with this feeling that she just needed to be near him. She had known her mood was driving her mom crazy and finally Laurel had given up and agreed to head back to the beach house and help get everything unpacked.

Pushing up hard from the bottom of the pool, Belly remembered how she had almost tumbled out of the car before it stopped - Jeremiah had burst out of the front door the moment her mom’s car hit the gravel drive - and she jumped into his arms. Taking a deep breath as her head broke the surface, she thought about how he had used their momentum to lift and spin her in a patented Jeremiah hug but it was when he had kissed her, the world wheeling in her peripheral vision, that it had felt like she could breathe for the first time in a week.  

It had been a chaste kiss, just a firm press of his lips on hers, but the sense of warmth that had spread through her limbs and the absence of that incessant tug to be by his side had helped calm her. He had enfolded her smaller hand in his larger one and pulled her toward the house into a chaotic scene of towering boxes and haphazard furniture. She had felt a moment of concern at the idea that  it might be harder to get things back in order than it had been to pack them up and remove them. 

ESP going strong, Jeremiah had looked over at Belly and crooked his gorgeous lips into her favorite half-smile and Belly had had the sudden feeling that everything would be fine but also that the sense of calm derived merely from his presence would be short-lived. The pull she had felt when they were separated had started up again and he had been standing right there .

Belly hadn’t quite realized what that feeling had meant at that point - she thought wryly as she started to swim laps. And it had been easy enough to dismiss it as she was swept into the work of getting the house in order - at least for the first few hours. 

It had become apparent quickly that all the activity meant that she and Jeremiah were going to find it difficult to find time to be alone. At first it hadn’t bothered her as she was so happy to see the beach house settling back to itself and at least she was in the same place as Jere but pretty fast it had started to drive her insane.

Turning over to float on her back, Belly thought about that first afternoon they had arrived. The house had been bustling with activity - Julia had clearly taken some additional time off and she and Skye had come back to help bring Susannah’s house back to life - and maybe put a bit of their own stamp on it. Skye had clearly formed a bond with Cam Cameron and convinced him to stop by so he was there helping too. Belly could hear Adam calling Jeremiah from the garage and when Steven and Taylor abruptly popped out of the living room Belly felt like her cup was full. All of them come together to put Susannah’s house to rights.

Jeremiah had quickly disappeared to help his father sort through boxes - though not before dropping a quick kiss on her cheek and with miles to go, Belly had grabbed Taylor and headed to the living room to start rearranging it. People wove in and out, moving boxes or furniture, asking questions and happily helping one another. She had loved the feeling that the house was humming with energy and life and smiled to herself as she and Taylor talked about camp while setting everything up. 

They had sat on the couch quietly for a while, heads together, relaxing after the work they put into making everything perfect when Steven had come looking for Tay and they had decided to go take a walk on the beach before dinner. 

As Belly climbed the stairs to grab a shower before dinner, she thought about how though she’d seen Jere a few times throughout the day, it had really only been in passing and she hadn’t gotten to talk to him or spend any time with him. Though it had gotten better when she was busy, that same antsiness had started like an itch under her skin again and Belly had resolved to find him and drag him off, even if it was just to grab groceries or run some donation boxes to Goodwill. 

As she slipped into her room it was clear someone had been hard at work upstairs, though there was no one around right now. She had almost hugged herself in happiness at everything being back as Susannah had left it. She had suspected that Jeremiah had had at least a hand in setting her room up because Junior Mint was proudly on display on her bed - at that thought she had grabbed her toiletries and headed into the bathroom in order to go find him faster. 

Susannah was the kind of hostess that had always had piles of soft fluffy towels ready and robes for guests hanging in the bathrooms. After showering Belly had found the pale gray waffle robe she preferred hanging on the back of the bathroom door and had slipped it on and twined her hair up in a towel. 

She had been smoothing moisturizer onto her face when a soft tap came at the door and at her quiet call of “come in”, Jeremiah had slipped in, a huge smile breaking out as soon as saw her. Belly had flashed back to the time, which felt like a different universe, that he’d stopped her coming out of the bathroom in only a towel, to tell her that they needed to talk about their kiss in the pool. Her skin had flushed at the memory. 

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere Bells,” Jeremiah had practically whispered, stepping right into her space and sliding his warm hands to either side of her neck. 

“You found me.” She had replied also in a whisper, beaming back at him and wrapping her hands around his wrists just to feel more of his skin on hers. 

“Why are we whispering?” Jeremiah had whisper-laughed in response.

“I don’t know, you started it.” She had flipped back, still in a hushed tone. 

“I think…” he had replied, leaning down and pressing his forehead to hers, “...it’s because I’m afraid if anyone hears us, there will immediately be 10 things someone needs us to do in places where the other person isn’t.” 

Belly had immediately felt her heartbeat kick up a notch and that pull to draw him closer had worsened. She had let some of her smile fall away and turning up her face towards him, like a flower seeking the sun, had breathed out the only thing she could quite put into words, “I missed you.”

The mood had shifted at her admission, taking on more intensity than playfulness and Jeremiah had looked at her searchingly before gently lowering his mouth to hers. He had slid around the back of her neck, pushing the towel off her hair so it had fallen in damp tangles around them while he had brought the other around her waist and pulled her body into his firmly though gently, like they had all the time in the world to stand in the bathroom and kiss.

Fragments of thoughts had drifted through her mind as he kissed her gently and repeatedly - kisses like he was sipping her breath…

…he had the softest lips

…how could he smell so good though he must have been sweating all afternoon

…her robe was the only layer between their bodies

…did he just instinctively know how to touch her to make her heart race

Almost beyond her control, Belly’s mouth had parted and her tongue darted out to taste the spot that drove her crazy, the beautiful bow of his full top lip. Something had shifted again and Jeremiah had stopped his delicate kisses and tilted her head to the side and sealed his mouth over hers. The depth of the kiss, sharing his breath, and his body pressed hard against hers had made Belly feel lightheaded with need. 

Love, longing and even desire were things she had experienced before but this…this was new - the tension had been coiled so tight in her stomach, she had felt like she barely knew what to do with her body. No one had ever created this burning need in her before Jeremiah.

She had some vague recollection that she had slipped her own hands into his hair, feeling the texture  of his curls between the pads of her fingers and gently holding him to herself to keep him as close as possible when the door had opened and Skye had uttered a startled “OH!” before quickly retreating and shutting the door. 

Belly dove back down beneath the surface and let the cool water flow over her. She thought about how she really hadn’t been sure what might have happened had Skye not interrupted that afternoon. Jere had seemed almost dazed when they broke the kiss and she recalled that he had had his fingers twined in the sash of her robe - almost as though he had been about to pull it loose - and she knew that she would have let him.

It had been hard for both of them to compose themselves but they had agreed to meet downstairs and head out to get everyone dinner. He had slipped out, letting his fingers trail along hers until the door was almost closed and she had followed a few minutes later - after some very deep breaths - to get dressed and meet him downstairs. 

At the time, she had resolved to find time for them to be alone later but that had not been in the cards. Four days later and it was starting to feel like some cosmic joke that each time they had a moment together, someone would come along and interrupt.

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: Coiling Tension

There’s this place in me where your fingerprints still rest, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. 

Belly pressed her back to the wall of the pool and reached up over each shoulder to grab the coping that edged the pool and held herself in place, letting her legs drift out in front of her body so she could catch her breath. 

After the…excitement…in the bathroom that first day, she and Jeremiah had followed through on their plan and left, just the two of them, to get takeout from the local Mediterranean place for the whole group. Although they had been alone, the mood had simmered down and they had simply held hands and chatted as they weaved through the streets in Jere’s car to get back to the house. Everyone was incredibly hungry after working all day and it was cheerful chaos when they returned and the group fell upon the food like a pack of starving wolves.

Then it had been a movie night, like the old days, and she had somehow gotten separated from Jeremiah - she on the couch between her mom and Taylor and he in a chair off to the side - she had spent the first hour thinking about how much her palms itched to touch his skin again but ultimately she must have been more exhausted than she thought, and she passed out on the couch and only barely woke up to get herself into bed. She almost laughed at the memory, as it seemed even she was part of the conspiracy to keep them apart. 

However, the next morning was another story entirely. After breakfast (and another quick and all-too-brief peck from Jeremiah), Belly had spent hours working in the kitchen trying to get everything unpacked and just where she knew it belonged. The weather had been sweltering all morning and the AC on the fritz (she guessed Steven had maybe broken it a bit more than he’d intended) and finally, fed up with it, Belly had changed into her oldest, softest, lightest tee shirt and thrown her hair atop her head in a messy bun to get it to stop clinging to her neck. 

The shirt had been her dad’s but years ago she had stolen it and cut out the neck and along the bottom to make it fit the way she wanted - sliding off one shoulder and just grazing the waistband of her shorts. It was the perfect hot weather shirt but even its almost silky cotton on her overheated skin had made her incredibly aware of her body.

While she was still sorting through objects, she had heard someone else come into the kitchen and Belly had no idea how she knew this, but even though he said nothing, she had known it was Jeremiah. Maybe it was by the tiny prickles that had started along her neck or the butterflies that had started in her stomach. 

Suddenly feeling a bit playful, Belly had opted not to turn around and to continue on with what she was doing - just to see what Jere would do. She had a sense he would do…something…given that he hadn’t alerted her to his presence. She had taken the gravy boat she had been unwrapping from newspaper and had stretched up on her tiptoes and tried to place it on the top shelf of one of the cabinets. 

Jeremiah’s warm fingers had wrapped around hers, plucking the piece of china from her grasp and deftly placing it in the cabinet. Belly hadn’t realized he had gotten so close and her start of surprise at his first touch had been genuine. As he had taken the item out of her hand, he had been close enough for her to feel the warmth of his body all along her back. He still hadn’t said anything and she had felt her breath come short in what she could only describe as anticipation. As he had lowered his arm, his beautiful long-fingered hand had come to rest gently on the slope of her exposed shoulder and he had moved closer, lining his body up against hers.

Belly, almost unconsciously, had let her head tilt toward her covered shoulder and rested it back against Jeremiah’s collarbone. The spot where his fingers touched her shoulder had felt like they were burning her skin. He had reached out the other hand to grip the edge of the countertop near her hip and hold them in place - almost caging her between his body and the counter. Her heart had begun to race as he leaned down, his nose ghosting along her shoulder and up her neck to the pulse point just beneath her ear to be replaced by the incredible softness of his lips as he breathed a kiss to the spot.

“Mmmmm.” Jere had hummed as though he’d eaten something delicious. That noise, the first one he had made, had caused Belly to feel the connection between them snap tight, pulling her body even more firmly into his and had caused her nipples to pebble.

“I forgot how beautiful you look with your hair up like this.” He had murmured, his lips placing the words along her skin. 

Jeremiah had moved his hand slowly down her arm and brought it across the front of her body, palm firmly coming to rest just below her belly button and fingers splaying even lower. The slightly calloused skin of his palm had grazed against the sensitive skin exposed where her shirt and shorts didn’t quite meet. Belly had struggled to take a full breath and had brought her hand to cover his, pressing it more firmly against her, a fire kindled low in her belly.

Against her back, she had heard Jeremiah’s breath stutter at her movement and felt the long, firm pressure of his cock against her ass. Some part of her brain had thought she should have felt shy at the blatant evidence of his arousal but she couldn’t quite summon the shyness - instead she had felt beautiful, powerful, and desired, knowing she had as much of an effect on him as he had on her. 

She had let her smile widen and spoke for the first time, teasingly, though somewhat more breathlessly than she had planned, “Oh yeah? Are you saying you don’t think I’m beautiful with my hair down?” 

“You’re always beautiful Bells,” Jere had rumbled in response, pressing himself more firmly, though still gently, against her. “But this way, I…can…do…this…” he had continued, punctuating every word with a kiss up along her neck. 

As his kisses had crept along her jawline, Belly had almost been panting with need for Jeremiah to bring his mouth to hers and had turned her head further toward him in order to catch his lips with her own, at which exact moment Steven had sauntered into the kitchen.

At the sight of them, their bodies pressed so firmly together and entwined, he had rolled his eyes, muttered “Gross” and immediately started talking about how Julia needed his and Jeremiah’s help in the yard. There were many times Belly could have cheerfully murdered her brother but that one had taken the cake she decided as Jeremiah had dropped a quick kiss on her forehead and reluctantly, perhaps for a variety of reasons, stepped away from her. 

The interruption had been an unwelcome distraction but as the boys walked out, she had turned and slid down to the floor - her legs had felt like jelly and her unkissed lips burned. Maybe a breather hadn’t been such a bad idea. With each of these encounters, she felt her own self-control eroding and had started to be a bit afraid she’d do something really reckless.

As she started on another set of laps, Belly thought that perhaps she should have been a bit embarrassed to be caught like that in the kitchen by a family member, her older brother no less, but she somehow couldn’t summon any feeling but frustration. It had just kept going from there and if she and Jere didn’t find a way to be alone, truly alone, soon - she thought she might well and truly lose her mind.

Chapter Text

Chapter 3: Tightened Knots

I cannot let you burn me up, nor can I resist you. No mere human can stand in a fire and not be consumed - A.S. Byatt

Belly focused on her form - the curve of her arm, cupping her fingers, turning her head just enough to draw breath - to distract herself from how her body warmed all over at the memory of last night. She had thought after the kitchen incident that she couldn’t get much more frustrated but she had been proven wrong. 

The rest of the day had passed similarly to the day before, everyone working, periodically crossing paths, grabbing food on the go. By that evening they had gotten most of the main rooms back in order and everyone thankfully stopped early to catch a shower, head out to surf or for a swim and things felt more settled. 

Her mom had come to find her just as she’d finished the last of the kitchen boxes and they’d headed into town to get some supplies for a barbecue. Adam had been in a great mood when they had returned and had helped Laurel get everything set up. Belly had been happy to find Jeremiah in the kitchen with his dad, washing lettuce, cutting vegetables and getting everything ready to make a big salad. She had thought to herself that something about it was so…Jeremiah. He could eat junk food with the best of them but he had wanted everyone to have something healthy to eat with their burgers and hot dogs. 

When she had come in, laden down with grocery bags, he had beamed at her and rushed over to help her get everything onto the counter. At the smallest brush of his hand to hers, she had felt her stomach flip and had to stop herself from grabbing his hand fully in hers. She had thought the feeling of not being totally in control of her body around him had been a fluke but it had started to seem like a permanent feature. For a fleeting moment, she had wondered if she could just drag him away somewhere and lock the door. 

Jere had seemed to notice something was up as he paused after taking the bags out of her hand and had locked eyes with her.

“You okay Bells?” He had asked softly.

“Mmmhmm.” She had replied, trying to sound cheerful but just sounding strained, even to her own ears. 

Jeremiah, brow furrowed slightly, had seemed about to say something more but after a pause had leaned over to gently brush his lips against the top of her head and stepped away to finish what he was doing. She had had to repress a shiver. 

Trying to shake off the tension, she had headed outside and started setting the table as cooking wasn’t her strong suit and she had felt she desperately needed something to do with her hands. She had focused on trying to set the table as Susannah would, almost as a form of meditation - the red and white linen napkins to the left, fork-knife-spoon laid on top, water glass in the upper right corner - and tried to clear her mind. The whole reason for this trip had been to reset Susannah’s house but with every minute that passed, Belly had been finding it harder and harder to pay attention to that. It had seemed like the only thing her brain could focus on was Jeremiah. 

Even as she had tried to devote her attention to the table, It had been like trying to sing a song while a different song was blasting on the radio. If she hadn’t known any better, she would have thought she was having delayed onset ADD - except it was more like AJD - Attention Jeremiah Disorder.

What had she even been thinking? Nonsense. He had turned her brain to mush - she had been making silly acronym-based jokes to herself about how distracting she found him. Taylor had come out to the deck and in her typical see-through-the-bullshit way, had cocked her eyebrow and said, “You have Jeremy face.”

“What is ‘Jeremy face’?” Belly had asked mock innocently. 

“Don’t you give me that look Isabel Conklin. You’ve had twirling pinwheel eyes every time you’re within a room of that boy.” Taylor had replied, coming up to her and twirling her index finger near Belly’s face dizzyingly. 

“I don’t even know what ‘pinwheel eyes’ are.” Belly had lied, turning back to setting the table and shrugging her shoulders though she had known she wasn’t fooling Taylor one bit.

“Fine, have it your way,” Taylor had said, laughing slightly and picking up a stack of napkins to help, “But you’ve got it bad.” 

“Got what bad?” Jeremiah had asked, with spectacularly bad timing, as he came through the french doors carrying the salad bowl.

“She’s got a bad sunburn.” Taylor had jumped in to save Belly, who had immediately felt herself turning beet red with embarrassment, almost as if to give truth to the story. 

Jeremiah had raised an eyebrow skeptically at the ridiculous lie and said, “Okaaay. Far be it from me to pry into the secrets of best friends.” and placed the bowl down on the table, casually throwing a wink at Belly as he headed back inside. 

She had slapped Taylor on the arm as her best friend had started laughing. Belly had reminded herself to start teasing Tay at the next possible opportunity about Steven - even though just thinking too hard about what exactly she could tease them about made her cringe slightly. 

Everyone had then piled outside and dinner had come together quickly. Overall it had been really nice, despite a few tense moments with Aunt Julia as she had seemingly remembered how unwelcome she had once felt here and between Adam and Jere, which was somewhat par for the course. However, Laurel had expertly steered conversation back to calmer waters and they had enjoyed a great meal as the sun drifted lower on the horizon. 

The only downside, Belly had thought to herself, was that once again, she had been separated from Jeremiah. It had seemed too rude once Skye had sat down to her left and her mom to her right, to find a way to try to move across the table to the seat Jere had clearly been hoping she’d take. So she’d had to console herself with simply sneaking looks at him throughout dinner. It hadn’t been too awful because he’d clearly been doing the same and would smile at her, or make silly faces, any time they caught one another’s eyes. 

She had wondered if he had also enjoyed looking at her the way she did at him. She had thought about how his warm brown skin glowed in the evening light and had been mesmerized by how the fine blonde hairs on his arm shone gold. Belly had never been ignorant of the fact that Jeremiah was cute, he was her cute best friend, but as she had sat across the table from him, that knot under her ribs pulling at her incessantly, a thought had broken upon her like a wave on the shore - Jeremiah was beautiful. 

Somehow, while she wasn’t looking, Susannah’s sunshine boy, Belly’s own golden retriever, had become a beautiful young man. She had almost felt silly thinking it, it had felt so serious and grown up - but that’s what he had seemed to her last night, grown up. His large blue-green eyes - rimmed in long dark lashes, the long straight slope of his nose, his full lips - the line of his jaw and the elegant strong neck. He was a young man, not a boy anymore. It had made her heart hurt in a strange way and she had felt tears prick behind her eyes wishing Susannah had seen him like this even as she felt the almost irrepressible urge to get up and touch each of those parts of him that her eyes had drifted over.

The odd combination of feelings had likely shown on her face and he had looked at her quizzically and she had blinked and smiled at him warmly, which he reflected back at her as he always did. She had wondered if their ESP was in effect and if he knew how desperately she had wished they were alone and if he had felt the same or if he had been content to just sit and enjoy a family meal. She had suspected perhaps it was the former as every time she looked at him, he had shifted in his seat or shuffled his feet, like he had been anxious to move, or get to her. The thought had made her smile even more broadly.

At that point, Julia had asked her something about her plans for Senior Year and college and she had been thankfully distracted enough answering questions and engaging Taylor in the discussion as well to prolong it to get through the rest of dinner.

Skye, Steven, and Taylor were on cleanup since Belly had shopped and Jeremiah had helped cook. They had stood up to start clearing the table and to begin the clean up and the three adults had settled down with their glasses of wine to talk and relax a bit. Belly and Jere had also stood up but before she could move to help clear, he had slipped around to her side and whispered, “Let’s take a walk on the beach.”

In what was becoming a habit, Belly had felt her heart start to race at his proximity and had smiled up at him, nodding in response. Jeremiah had grabbed a blanket from a basket by the stairs and they had set out down the beach path hand in hand. Belly had thought as they disappeared around the corner that she had seen her mother smile at them and it had made her feel good that Laurel seemed to see how happy she was and share it. 

They had walked straight toward the water and a little way from the surf, on dry sand, Jere had dropped the blanket. Never once letting go of each other's hands, they had started off down the beach for a little walk.

“Aunt Julia is being so great.” Jere had remarked as they ambled slowly down by the water, “And I’ve only wanted to smack my dad 5 times.” He had half-joked, though he seemed genuinely pleased.

Belly had laughed and said teasingly, “Yes, your self-restraint is amazing.” Then in a more serious tone, “Honestly, it sounds like maybe Julia had it tough with your grandfather from what Skye has said. It does seem like she’s willing to try for a fresh start.”

After a few moments of quiet, Jere had responded, “I know he was always great with my mom but I can kind of see what Julia has been saying. Even when I was a kid, I sort of knew he just didn’t like anything…messy. I do think that’s where my mom got that instinct a bit but I think she also would have been really happy about Julia being here and making the place her own. I’m glad I’m getting to know her.”

Belly had felt that bubble of happiness she frequently felt around Jeremiah grow - his ability to look beyond the surface and to try to see things from others perspectives was one of her favorite things about him. Aware of the fact that not many teenage boys had the well of empathy and forgiveness Jeremiah seemed to, she had appreciated that it was one of those things that made him - him.  

“I think your mom would be happy about that too.” She had replied, tightening her hold on his hand and casting a look at him as they walked.

After that they had moved onto lighter topics, how great the house was coming along, what they might do over the next few days in their free time, and of course, joked about Steven and Taylor’s lack of chill around one another, whatever they said about not being ‘that couple’. Belly had continued to feel the pull to be closer to him beyond their clasped hands, but it had become like background noise, and she had enjoyed that they could still simply be best friends and talk even as their relationship was changing. 

They had walked for a long while, it had felt good to stretch her legs and move her body after doing so much unboxing and cleaning. The sun had set fully and a huge moon was up by the time they made it back to the blanket Jeremiah had dropped near the house. 

He had bent over and laid the blanket out and promptly dropped down to lay on his back, hands under his head as he looked up at Belly where she stood over him. The light from the house shone a bit in the distance up away from near the water where they were and she could hear music. She hadn’t been able to see onto the deck through the trees but it had somehow felt cozy to know the house was full of people at a distance.

Belly had sat down gently next to Jeremiah and had felt a somewhat absurd wave of shyness given her thoughts and feelings over the past few days. The tension between them felt suddenly thicker and she had fidgeted awkwardly. Ever observant, he had asked, “What’s going on Bells?”

She had laid back, copying his position, hands under her head and tried to seem nonchalant, “What do you mean?”

Jere had rolled to his side facing her and she had turned her head to look at him. “You seem almost…upset with me. Is something wrong? I don’t want you to feel…” and he trailed off slightly, “...Like I’m coming on too strong?”

Belly had looked into his lovely face and thought about how to answer - how to explain to him that she felt the opposite and that she was embarrassed about her own need to touch him, to kiss him, to feel her skin on hers - that it was a constant refrain running through her mind even when they were just trying to take a nice walk as a couple. She had already told him that she wanted him but this had taken on a new dimension. She hadn’t been sure how to express to him that he was overloading her senses and that, rather than him coming on too strong, she was afraid she would scare him off with the intensity of her feelings. 

Long moments must have passed as all of this had spun through her head and Jere had begun to look more concerned the longer she had said nothing - so Belly had scrambled to say something. 

“It’s the opposite!” She had almost snapped. 

Seeming somewhat confused, possibly by the difference between her tone and her words, Jeremiah had raised his brows and asked slowly, “What do you mean? What’s the opposite?”

Belly had turned back to look up at the stars, feeling overwhelmed by his gaze, and had tried to calm her breathing somewhat and started to explain, “Every time you’re near me, or even a room away, I feel this…pull…to be close to you. Every time you touch me or kiss me even gently or casually, sparks race along my skin.” She had thought to herself, ‘In for a penny, in for a pound’, and continued, “I can’t breathe when you’re next to me like this and I want more…more of everything, more of you.”

Jeremiah had looked almost startled and huffed out something between a breath and a laugh - but Belly had been able to tell he hadn’t been laughing at her, more at himself. “I guess I’m just an idiot.” he remarked ruefully, then intensely, “You keep telling me, but somehow I keep being surprised that you want me as much as I want you.”

At that, he had shifted over bringing his body flush against her side. Those sparks she had told him about had begun to go off like fireworks as he had stroked a finger across her brow, brushing the small hairs the wind had swept into her eyes and mouth off her face. One finger became four as he kept the same gentle motion going and moved down the side of her face, over her cheekbone, and over across her lips. It had been like being kissed and made her ache for his lips on hers. 

“This is my favorite face in the world.” He breathed as his fingertips brushed down over her chin softly, down her throat and rested for a moment in the hollow between her collarbones. “You’ve always been who I see the brightest but tonight at dinner, I almost couldn’t stop myself from staring at you. Like I was a compass and you were my magnetic north.”

Belly had been able to neither speak nor take in a full breath as he continued, his touch continuing down her sternum and then gently sliding along the neck of her shirt where it draped across the top of her breast. She had told Jeremiah her skin sparked at his touch, but she had felt like she was aflame as he kept speaking and caressing her. 

“I feel the same. It feels impossible to keep my hands off of you and I want more of you.” He had kept speaking as his hand had glided lower. Her shirt had fallen further off her shoulder and the top of her bralette peeked out and Jeremiah had run his fingertips along the edge. 

He had not stopped gazing at her face and his hand traced up toward the strap crossing her shoulder, goosebumps flared along her chest in the wake of his touch. He had slid his index finger under the strap, toying with it gently and he had looked down at her and utterly seriously asked, “Belly, can I touch you?”

Only Jeremiah, Belly had thought, would be this careful, this considerate, to ask for consent for a touch she had allowed him before. Even as she had been splayed out for him, almost panting at his touch and having told him how much she needed more of him. Her heart had stuttered with affection for this boy and she had breathed out, “Please,” the urgency plain in her voice. 

Still watching her face, he had slipped the strap down her shoulder, never once letting his fingers leave her skin and used his palm to brush her shirt and bra away so that her breast was immediately covered by his large warm hand. Jeremiah gently cupped her breast and despite the warmth, her nipple had tightened instantly at the contact and she had gasped as he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. 

It had almost been too much to have him watch her while touching her that way and arousal had pooled low in her belly. Finally, he had leaned over and laid his mouth on hers gently but Belly had not been in the mood for one more gentle kiss and she had angled her head and deepened it immediately. At her motion, she had Jeremiah cant his hips against her and his cock firmly pressed against her thigh. Just as she had been about to move her hands from where they had been tangled in his hair and explore, he had beaten her to it and began to trail kisses down along her jaw and chest, fully distracting her.

“Your skin is so soft.” He had muttered in awe against her neck as he had continued his path downward. His hand had continued stroking and teasing but he had quickly replaced it with the warmth of his gorgeous mouth. He had sealed his lips around her nipple and sucked it deeply, a gentle graze of teeth had sent a shock through Belly’s body and straight between her thighs. 

She had heard herself moan and this seemed to spur Jeremiah on. He had slid his arm around her, under her lower back, pulling her body more fully into his. Belly had felt dazed and fleetingly worried someone might have heard her up at the house but no one came and her focus narrowed to where Jeremiah’s tongue was twining around her taught peak. 

“Feels so good,” She had managed to stutter out. Jeremiah had then slid one long leg between hers and pressed right where she needed him most. It had felt like a relief to be able to grind herself down on his hard thigh and she had felt herself about to come undone when…”BELLY!” Laurel had shouted from up the beach and both of them had immediately tensed up - and not in pleasure. 

Belly almost slapped the water on her next down stroke, she was still so frustrated. Her whole body had been on the cusp of an amazing orgasm, finally driven by someone else, when her mother had so rudely interrupted.  Jeremiah’s forehead had dropped to her shoulder and they had breathed hard while leaning against one another and tried to return to a normal state. Finally, she had shouted back, “COMING!” a bit angrily as they stood and brushed sand off themselves and shook out the blanket. Jere had pressed one more hard kiss to her lips and whispered, “I'm sorry” in a way that had felt more like he was uttering a curse than an apology, and then made their way up the beach and back home. It had been a very sleepless night…at least on her part.

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: Fraying Cords

You are a dream I get to have with eyes wide open

Pushing down her slight unease, Belly made a last push toward the wall of the pool, from almost the halfway mark, holding her breath even as her lungs screamed for air - relishing the feeling of pushing her limits because somehow it was helping her burn through the sense of physical and emotional overwhelm. She thought about how she had barely had two minutes with Jere today after last night on the beach. She had seen him this morning to give him a brief kiss as he was grabbing a cup of coffee before going on some errands with his dad and she had thought she had seen him briefly in the driveway from the window but he hadn’t ended up coming inside. Hoping to spend some time together, she had gone looking for him to join her for this swim in fact, and he had been nowhere to be found and not answering his phone. Not sure if the slight sense of panic was related to his being MIA or the fact that she was entirely out of breath, she finally pulled her head up gasping and almost slid under again in surprise.  Jeremiah was crouched down, elbows on knees, hands lightly folded, right by the edge of the pool where she had come up. 

He laughed lightly, “I hope you weren’t planning to drown yourself.”

Belly replied a bit snarkily as she pushed herself out of the pool, “Just trying to work off some excess energy.”

Jere chuckled and stood up to grab her a towel from one of the loungers and came to wrap it around her shoulders, “Sorry I was MIA today, turned out Dad had some huge plans that involved dropping off what felt like 100 boxes at Goodwill and then picking up 100 plants at Home Depot.” He rubbed her towel clad shoulders when he saw her give a slight shiver, misinterpreting the reason, and answered her unasked question. “He wants to do a ton in the garden - thinks it will be a good tribute to mom.” 

Looking up into his eyes, Belly casually remarked quietly, “I tried to call you a few times.”

“I’m so sorry, Bells. I just saw the calls, my phone had fallen on the floor of the car and I didn’t realize. I was literally loading and unloading the car all day and didn’t even have a chance to look for it. I actually thought I’d left it here. I called you back like 20 mins ago.” He replied earnestly.

“I was in the pool.” 

“Seems so - you’re all pruney.” He responded and picked up her right hand and pressed a light kiss to her wrinkled fingertip. “How long were you in there?”

“I'm not totally sure. Let’s just say the sun was definitely still up when I got in.” She answered, giving a rueful look at the dusky sky. She also noticed that everything seemed sort of quiet. “Where is everyone?”

Jeremiah twisted his fingers with hers and lifted the other hand to stroke down her wet hair. “They all headed over to the club for dinner - Cam’s mom made us a reservation - I volunteered to come get you.”

Jere delivered this last statement with a sly boyish smile and Belly felt her crankiness abate slightly. She hadn’t really thought he was avoiding her but she had felt uneasy not seeing him all day - especially after last night. Her mood had been poisoned by a combination of missing him, hormonal overload and an odd sort of fear that they somehow weren’t on the same page. 

However, noticing that he seemed calmer than when she’s come out of the pool - shoulders relaxed, slight dimple in his cheek - made it clear that there was nothing amiss between them and it had truly just been an unexpectedly busy day. 

“What time is the reservation?” Belly asked, wanting to know how much time they had to get ready.

Jere paused briefly, his eyes sparkling, “Not for another hour. Everyone headed over early for cocktails - there’s a live jazz band tonight.”

Quickly calculating that they probably only needed 15 to get ready and 10 to drive over, Belly flashed Jeremiah a look - the air suddenly felt heavy with the promise of a few minutes alone. Without warning, Jere caught her up with one strong arm behind her knees and one at her back, the towel still dangling from her shoulders and strode over to the lounge chairs. 

She laughed - feeling breathless and incredibly happy - and yet also asked slightly self-consciously, “What are you doing?”

“I’m enjoying a few precious moments alone with my girlfriend.” He replied, laying her down on the lounge and promptly climbing next to her, and teasingly added, “What are you doing?”

The word ‘girlfriend’ had come out after an infinitesimal pause and Belly had felt her heart constrict - she so wanted to get this moment right between them. Snuggling her body up against his, she put as much meaning into her voice as she could and replied, “I’m enjoying some alone time with my boyfriend.”

Although he had started them down this path, she could see Jeremiah’s slight shock that she had seen his bet and raised rather than being evasive. She simply didn’t want to waste one more moment letting him wonder how she felt about him and them. He had been so forthright with her last year about his feelings but after the absolute mess that ensued, it had still been so hard to match his courage and tell him what she was feeling after they had headed out on their road trip. 

She had tried to tell him without telling him, coyly asking about why he didn’t want to kiss her during Truth or Dare and hoping he had understood she was trying to tell him that she had wanted to kiss him. But Jeremiah deserved so much more and once her first admission was out “I want something real. I want you.” she had promised herself she wouldn’t hold back again. 

Belly wanted badly to diffuse the slight look of anxiety in his eyes and so she gathered her courage, slid her hands up his back, and pressed herself more firmly against him and continued huskily, “What? Did you think I would let anyone other than my boyfriend suck my nipple into his mouth and make me feel like my whole body was on fire?”

It worked, a series of emotions that were definitely not anxiety flashed across Jere’s face and settled into something that almost looked like an adoring smirk. Between that look and her own boldness, Belly hadn’t quite bargained for how taking their conversation in this direction was now making her heart race at the memory of last night. 

He tugged slightly at the towel and covered both of them from head to thigh - Belly was suddenly grateful that Susannah always kept those big plush beach towels like blankets - and shut out everything else.

“Well…I certainly hope not.” He replied, brushing his nose along hers gently and nipping her bottom lip. 

When his tongue darted out to taste the spot he had just grazed with his teeth, Belly’s whole body began to tingle and she could feel the slick of arousal. Once again,marveling at how he seemed to know exactly what would drive her crazy, she pressed her lips to his and breathed out, “How do you know?”

Jere had brought his hand up along the side of her neck, fingertips just threading into her wet hair, and distractedly answered between kisses, “How do I know what?”

Placing her hand over his, her palm to the back of his hand, she pulled back slightly and looked at him, “How do you know how to touch me so that I instantly feel like I’m going to crawl out of my skin unless you keep going?”

He looked mildly surprised but his eyes danced with happiness, “I don’t know. I just know I want you to feel good when you’re with me…” and he paused slightly and practically whispered, “...And I know you Bells. I know when something is on your mind - you get a cute little furrow right here,” He swiped the pad of a finger between her brows, “I know when you’re sad - your shoulders round and you tighten your jaw trying to keep it inside,” another brush of his fingers right below her cheekbone, “And when you’re happy, your beautiful lips twist almost as if they’re trying to lock up your smile.” Another brush, but this time of his lips on hers. 

“I know you but I also want to learn - what makes you breathless,” another kiss, “what brings you closer to me,” another kiss and pulling her more tightly against him, “what makes you arch your back because it feels so good,” fingertips gliding up her spine, “what makes you come undone.” 

At that Belly shifted her knee over Jeremiah’s hip to bring him closer and wound her fingers in the curls at the base of his head, slanting her mouth over his. She could feel her heartbeat in her neck where his hand rested, in her palms where she gripped his hair and between her legs. Her nipples pebbled in her damp bathing suit and the slickness between her thighs was almost embarrassing - she wanted his mouth all over her, his tongue caressing every part of her body the same way it was stroking against her own. 

Moving her hands up his back, Belly reveled in the sensation of his warm skin against her palms and the goosebumps she raised in the wake of her touch. Jeremiah’s cock was a hard pressure against her pubic bone and knowing she turning her on the same way he was her, made her almost incoherent. She finally managed to get out, “Jeremiah - please touch me again.”

Jere hadn’t explicitly asked for permission but had clearly been waiting for it - she found herself rolled onto her back and he was moving the straps of her bathing suit down - before she fully realized what was happening, his mouth was back on her breast, kissing, licking, and sucking. She completely lost the power to think or speak at the feel of his lips and tongue on her again. 

His hand was like a weight on her hip - with every draw of his mouth she thought about how much she needed him to keep touching her. Her knees fell open and she almost thrust into the air in an attempt to relieve the tension. His fingers were almost digging into her, as though he was afraid if he held her more lightly, his hand would wander beyond his control and do something she wasn’t ready for. 

Laying open mouth kisses across her sternum, he moved to her other breast and he reached up to replace his mouth with his hand. She caught his fingers in hers, pulled away to look him in the eye and slowly placed his palm on her stomach, guiding his hand down with her own. 

“Jeremiah…” She breathed out and focused on asking him with her body and her eyes to touch her where she needed and because he did know her, he no longer needed any more guidance and moved his hand to cover her. 

Jeremiah’s pupils were blown wide and Belly saw him swallow hard like he was trying to contain himself. He pressed his middle finger down, sliding it back and forth over where her wetness had soaked through the thin fabric of her suit, slick on the nylon. The pressure of his finger and the slight roughness of the fabric created just enough friction and she shifted her hips to increase the pressure.

She knew he wasn't trying to tease her but she needed to be skin to skin. He must have sensed that she needed more because he gently pulled her suit aside and repeated the motion of sliding his finger between her pussy lips. Belly almost stopped breathing at the slick slide of his touch and her back truly did arch.

“You’re so wet.” Jere said, almost in awe. 

“More.” Belly said and pulled him down for a kiss as he slipped one long finger inside her and then quickly a second. 

Moving her hand between their bodies, she cupped her palm around his cock through his shorts. The movement of his fingers inside of her stuttered in its rhythm at the first stroke of her palm on him. She wanted to touch him, wanted to make him feel as good as she felt right now but he moved his thumb to circle her clit, and she stopped being able to focus on anything but what he was doing to her. She tried to keep stroking him, the heat of him blazing against her palm but her attention kept wavering.

This felt a thousand, a million, times better than his thigh last night, he was narrowing her whole world to the juncture between her thighs and she could feel herself getting close. He must have sensed her walls fluttering, because Jere thrust his fingers inside of her more deeply and crooked them slightly, his thumb pressing on her clit with the perfect amount of pressure and then he leaned down to suck her nipple into his mouth and that was it, she finally shattered. 

Jere kept stroking her gently through her orgasm, laying his mouth to her sternum, her collarbones, under her ear and finally kissing her lips sweetly. Belly could feel her chest rising and falling - almost like she’d run a mile - and she felt incredibly satisfied and finally sated. 

“That was amazing.” She remarked in wonder. 

“You’re amazing.” Jeremiah replied, withdrawing his fingers from inside her and discreetly wiping them on the towel before wrapping his arms around her. “I think I could watch that all day. Best new show.”

Belly, well, belly laughed at that, kissed his nose and wound her hands in his hair, “Well, it was the pilot episode but I’m sure we could shoot some more.” she answered, keeping up the silly metaphor.

Apparently it was silly because Jere pulled back to look at her and seemed incredibly confused.

“I mean, not the pilot episode but like the pilot episode that aired…” He still looked confused, “Ugh, sorry, I’m being dumb - I mean I’ve never gotten off with someone else before.” She finished in an embarrassed rush. 

Rather than seeming less confused, Jeremiah seemed more, “But…you’ve had sex before.” He stated, leaving it open to correction though he’d known she had. 

“Well, yes,” Belly started a bit haltingly, “And enjoyed it.” He seemed interestingly relieved at this. “But, I never fully got…there.”

Jeremiah’s confusion cleared, he nodded in understanding and cupped her cheek, stroking across her cheekbone with his thumb. “And by ‘there’ you mean, ‘had an orgasm’?” He asked teasingly.

Belly giggled and replied in a mock serious tone, “Yes, I mean I have never had an orgasm with someone else.”

“Then I’ll make it my job to make sure you have a lot more.” He replied, matching her tone, but Belly could tell he was incredibly serious. He had meant what he said about wanting her to feel good, she could tell with every touch and kiss that he was paying attention. 

“I don’t think you’re going to have to work that hard to make that happen, Jere.” She replied softly. “I told you, every time you so much as look at me, my heart starts racing, I feel this pull toward you, and my body starts tingling.”

Belly started moving one hand back into his hair and sliding her other down between their bodies. She wanted to make him feel as good as he’d made her feel. His cock was still hard, straining against the fabric of his shorts. This time, she slipped her fingers into the waistband and wrapped her hand around him. He was silky soft over rigid muscle - she swiped her thumb through the drops of precum at the head and stroked him gently.

She could see a vein pulsing in his throat and leaned toward him to kiss the spot, darting her tongue out to lick him gently, even as she kept her hand in motion, up and down, feeling every inch of him. Her Jeremiah, always quick with a joke, never without a sweet word, seemed to be beyond speech. His eyes had drifted closed and he was breathing heavily, his hand clutching her hip reflexively. Belly thought to herself that she understood what he meant about wanting to watch her all day - she felt the same. 

Suddenly she heard voices and froze - Jeremiah’s eyes popped open, he’d clearly heard them too.

“I can’t believe you forgot your phone.” She could hear Steven saying in exasperation. “Do you really need it?”

“Yes Steven, I need it.” Taylor replied. “But now I can’t remember where it is. Also, come to think of it, where are Jeremy and B? Didn’t he come back here to pick her up?”

Their voices were getting louder and closer, meaning they were about to come around the corner. Jeremiah quickly sat up and adjusted himself and Belly got her bathing suit back in a place where it was actually covering her just in time for Taylor and Steven to appear. 

Belly wondered what they looked like, it certainly couldn’t have been entirely innocent. Taylor’s smirk seemed to confirm that. 

“Hey guyssss,” She drawled, slightly elbowing Steven, who rolled his eyes, “Whatcha doin’?”

Belly grabbed the towel and wrapped it around her waist, “Just heading up for a quick shower.”

“Yep, me too.” Jeremiah managed to get out. “Not together.” He added unnecessarily. 

“Seriously guys. Come on! That’s my sister.” Steven whined to seemingly no one and everyone. And then continued snarkily, “Reservation is in 20. Get a move on - everyone is waiting for you.”

Casting one more look at Jeremiah that she hoped conveyed her thought that they would pick this up later, Belly rushed upstairs to get ready. She was going to find a way around these interruptions come hell or high water.

Chapter Text

Chapter 5: Twists & Twirls

Licence my roving hands, and let them go

Before, behind, between, above, below.

• John Dunne

The band returned from their break and the music began again just as Belly and Jeremiah arrived at the club. They made their way over to where Laurel, Adam and Julia were sitting next to the dance floor and caught a bit of their conversation.

“Susannah loved Glenn Miller.” Laurel commented wistfully.

“Big band and classic movies.” Adam picked up, “She had a way of getting everyone around her invested no matter how old fashioned or uncool those things became. She had that touch to make them interesting.”

“I think you all have the only pack of teenagers left in the Western hemisphere that wants to sit around watching Bette Davis and Ava Gardner movies.” Julia laughed. Belly knew Skye and Taylor were not quite as enthused about classic film as she, Steven and the boys were.

Belly came up next to Laurel and pressed her hip against her mom’s shoulder giving her a bit of a half hug hello. 

“There you are, we’d almost given you up for lost.” Laurel commented as she gave her a one-armed squeeze and Jere sat down in an empty chair next to Julia. 

“I was swimming and lost track of time.” She shot him a look and a smile, “Luckily Jere saved me from becoming completely water logged.”

He adorably mimed tugging on an imaginary cap, “At your service, miss.”

“You two should go dance.” Adam said, nodding toward the full dance floor. “I know those deb lessons must have done some good.”

“Taylor and Steven are out there somewhere already.” Julia remarked by way of encouragement. 

“Shall we?” Jeremiah asked her, standing back up and holding out his hand. 

“We shall.” Belly replied, giggling and placing her hand in his. As usual it triggered tiny sparks that ran from her palm and up her arm. 

They couldn’t spot Taylor and Steven anywhere so they made their way to a semi-open spot - couples moving slowly all around them. Belly placed her hand on Jeremiah’s shoulder and clasped her right hand in his left. He placed his left hand at the base of her ribs and curved his fingers so he was holding her gently and they started a small box step, staying mostly in the same place.

“I’m impressed we remember this so well.” Belly commented, smiling up at Jeremiah and enjoying the familiar music. 

He returned the smile slightly but it seemed sad. She saw his Adam's Apple bob as he swallowed, clearly about to say something serious, and softly said. “I’m sorry we never got that dance at the deb ball.”

Belly was a bit shocked, she didn’t really know why Jeremiah was apologizing for that. He had just found out Susannah’s cancer had come back and that Conrad had known and not told him - Belly had been anxious at the time, feeling slightly on the spot as they waited for her for the first dance, but she had never been angry at Jere or blamed him. 

“Please don’t apologize.” She whispered. His disappearance that night was barely a blip compared to what she had done after. “If anyone should apologize, it’s me.”

Jeremiah started slightly and frowned down at her, “What? Why?”

“For everything that happened after, with Conrad. For assuming you were ok. For believing you were ok…”

“Belly…” He began to interrupt. 

But Belly really wanted him to understand, so she pressed on, “It was selfish not to talk to you about it and clarify things. I don’t have much excuse on that front. I let myself off easy just believing you had moved on but I should have asked.” She paused, taking a deep breath, “I think on some level I didn’t really know I could break your heart.”

She hoped so much that he understood that she wasn’t apologizing for being with Conrad and that she wasn’t making excuses, but rather sharing that she had wished she’d handled it differently - talked to him, really looked at him rather than seeing everything through the lens of her own first love goggles and disbelief that not one, but two of her favorite boys could care for her that way. 

Jeremiah was looking at her intently, as their feet continued on their practiced path, and replied, “Well, I certainly made it hard for you to know.”

Belly felt herself looking at him quizzically, “What do you mean?”

“Looking back, if I’m honest, I think I really surprised you with my confession that night in the pool. And I know my reputation - I don’t take things seriously, or that’s what everyone thinks - and I know you, you don’t see yourself the way everyone around you does. I tried to get you to understand how I felt without ever really… telling you how I felt.” He struggled to get out. “It hurt but I wasn’t honest about how deeply or badly. So I don’t think you can take that blame all on yourself Bells.”

Belly almost felt like crying. She hated the thought of hurting Jeremiah and it felt like for ages that’s all she had done. And yet he was here trying to share the responsibility of that with her. “I’m never gonna break your heart again.” She said thickly through the tears gathering in her throat.

He paused their movements and slid his hand from where it rested on her ribs up under her hair and gently held her where her neck curved into her shoulders, “Break it. Break it over and over again. It’s worth it, you’re worth it. Every time.” He replied, his beautiful eyes scanning every inch of her face. 

“I won’t. I won’t hurt you. Ever again.” She swore - to him, herself, the room.

His smile was gentle and his eyes shining, “You will. And I will. That’s just the deal. All that matters is that we try not to hurt each other and be good to one another. That’s all I want or need from you.”

Belly was shivering, goosebumps arising in a wave from where his hand stroked her neck. The knot in her solar plexus tightened and she couldn’t figure out if she wanted to smile or cry. She settled for placing her hands on the sides of Jeremiah’s face, pulling him down toward her gently and kissing him on the forehead - the way he sometimes did to her. 

“I promise I will always try not to hurt you.” She whispered, her lips brushing against his smooth skin. Pulling back, she saw he was smiling hugely and she let her smile break free in return.

“I promise I will always try not to hurt you.” He replied, almost like they were speaking vows. 

Abruptly the band shifted to an upbeat song, startling both of them, and they realized that they had stopped dancing entirely and were just simply standing around as all the other couples danced around them. 

Jeremiah huffed out a laugh and gently tweaked Belly’s nose. She playful swatted him away as he said, “Let’s go find everyone else. I’m starving!”

Belly laughed because of course he was but dropped her hand into his and followed him back to where Laurel, Adam and Julia were. Steven must have been right behind them as he trotted up at the same time and said, “Table’s ready!”

Taylor, Skye and Cam were already seated at a long table almost in the center of the dining room as the rest of the party rolled in. 

“Cam, will your mother be joining us?” Laurel asked as they moved to sit down. 

Smiling his usual sweet smile Cam replied, “No, she’s working tonight but she asked me to act as the ‘host’ for her. I’m sure she’ll stop by to say hello in a bit.”

“Good, maybe we can convince her to join us for dessert.” Julia added. 

As the adults sat down, Belly made sure not to let go of Jeremiah’s hand. She wasn’t in the mood to be separated from him tonight. This time Steven got the short straw and had to sit across from Taylor instead of next to her - he shot Belly a cranky look and she stuck her tongue out at him and very deliberately turned it into a gloat as she sat down next to Jeremiah.

Despite the group tone being more fun and lighthearted, Belly felt the intensity of their conversation on the dancefloor linger. Neither she nor Jeremiah seemed to be able to go even a few moments without touching the other - a brush of arms, fingers delicately stroking a knee, breath ghosting along a shoulder as they leaned over to speak to one another - as the evening continued, the shape of the intensity shifted and changed, became more charged. 

Belly could not stop thinking about earlier - how close she had felt to Jeremiah, how he had made her feel so good, what it had been like to touch him - and, of course, how they had been interrupted. It was a bit awkward to be thinking about all of this two feet from her mother but the memories wouldn’t stop running vividly through her mind. Most of all, what she couldn’t stop thinking about was that she wanted to make Jeremiah feel as good as he’d made her feel. 

As dinner wound down, there was talk of an after dinner drink at the bar, Skye and Taylor disappeared, presumably to the restroom but one never knew with Taylor, and Cam had gone to help his mother with something. Steven got up and also stepped away without much comment and Belly realized this was her moment. 

Leaning over towards Jere, she whispered, “Wanna get out of here?”

He raised his eyebrows as his mouth widened in a smile, “Definitely.”

As one, they stood up and headed out of the dining room - interestingly, not a single voice was raised behind them asking where they were going or calling them back. 

Belly took the lead and started pulling Jeremiah along behind her. Through his laughter he said, “Where are we headed, Bells? Is the club on fire?”

She smirked and kept her mouth shut until they slipped through a door right into the theater. She stopped moving and turned to look at her beautiful boyfriend, “I just wanted to get you alone.”

“Oh yeah?” He replied, walking toward her and wrapping his arms low around her waist, pulling her up against his body. As usual, her heart started racing.

“Yeah.” She replied, twinkling up at him.

“And how long do you think we will be alone here exactly?”

Belly pretended to think, and started walking Jeremiah backwards toward the door. “Hm, well I have it on good authority that on nights where there isn’t a screening, the doors are usually locked.”

“Interesting, I wonder why that one wasn’t locked?” He asked teasingly, at which moment Belly’s hand hit the door where it was clasped around his back and she snapped the lock in place with a satisfying click . 

“Isn’t it?” She returned innocently and leaned up to place her lips on his, something she’d been dying to do for what felt like hours. 

The kiss bypassed gentle and went right to heated, Jeremiah’s hands finding their way into her hair and Belly pressing her hips against him to close the minimal distance between them. As he started to trail kisses across her face and down her jaw, Jere grazed his fingers along the outside of her thigh. Belly found her breath coming short as she felt her dress catch on his hand as it continued its way up. It was so tempting to get lost in his touches but Belly had a plan and this plan was all about Jere. 

She caught up his hand from where it was almost at the edge of her underwear and brought it up to her lips, kissing each knuckle as she gazed at him from under her lashes. Turning his hand, she placed a kiss on his palm and Jeremiah appeared to almost be spellbound. 

Belly let her other hand drift to the top button of his shirt and began undoing each one, making sure to let her fingers gently brush the skin she exposed. She could feel how shallow his breaths were coming and could see that he was holding himself back, trying to let her take the lead. She felt a thrill at the realization that rather than letting herself be swept away in a moment of passion, she was deliberately trying to arouse and excite - her goal was to use her hands, her mouth, and her body to bring Jeremiah as much pleasure as possible. 

As her hand reached where his shirt was tucked in, Belly leaned forward and sealed her mouth over his. It was hard not to give in to the feelings that almost overwhelmed her any time they kissed but she focused on putting her hands to work opening the button and sliding the zipper down on his pants. 

Although she knew Jeremiah had to be aware of her movements, he seemed utterly intent on kissing the sense out of her. But as she slipped her hand inside of his boxers, she knew she had his full attention when she both felt and heard his breath catch. 

Pulling back slightly, Belly sank to her knees and Jere breathed out, “Belly…” in a tone that suggested he couldn’t decide if he was going to beg her to stop or go on. 

Not really knowing herself where this confidence was coming from as she had never done this, she cast a look up at him and replied, “Shhhh…I want to. Let me make you feel good.” 

He gave her a long look and then took a deep breath and nodded slightly. Belly released him from his boxers and wrapped her hand around his length, giving a gentle stroke and observed the effect she was having. Jeremiah was already rock hard, delicate blue green veins standing out against this, some of his only pale skin. Belly was transfixed for a moment that her touches and kisses had done this but then remembered how her own body felt the moment Jeremiah touched her and overwhelmed with a desire for him, leaned forward to place a kiss right where a drop of precum had gathered at his slit. 

It seemed like Jeremiah could not tear his eyes away from where she knelt, gently kissing his cock, but as Belly slipped him between her lips, her tongue making a lazy circle around the head, she heard him huff out a breath and the muffled clonk as the back of his head head hit the door. 

Being a novice, she wasn’t going to try anything crazy but she couldn’t seem to stop herself from moving her mouth and hands over as much of him as possible. When she sucked gently, an “Oh my god, Belly!”, dropped from Jeremiah’s lips. His skin was silky soft and burning hot, it was making her pulse race. 

When she looked up at him, every line of his body was pulled taut, his breathing shallow and all she wanted was to feel him fall apart. One hand wrapped around and stroking his cock, the other anchored at his hip, Belly focused on sucking and swirling her tongue over every inch of him. 

Jeremiah was practically shivering and ground out, “Bells, I’m gonna come.” He gently tried to push her off of him, but again, Belly had other plans. She guided his hand into her hair and continued her movements, increasing her pace and grip slightly. She flattened her tongue and ran it along what she noticed was a particularly sensitive spot just under the head of his penis and Jeremiah groaned and a burst of wetness flowed across her tongue. 

It was salty but not very unpleasant and she swallowed without any trouble, surprised at how her own body felt like it was humming and she could feel an echoing wetness between her legs. Releasing his cock with a last tiny kiss, Belly sat back on her heels and smiled up at her gorgeous and now very rumpled boy. 

Apparently, he had been running his hands through his hair and pulling at his shirt to, she guessed, try to control himself and she absolutely loved how undone he looked. 

Beaming up at him, she remarked, “Now you’re the one who’s amazing”. 

He tucked himself back into his boxers and pulled her to her feet, immediately pulling her against him and kissing her lightly. “Nope. Still you.”

“The whole night, all I could think about was touching you and finding some way to see the look on your face you had just now.” Belly replied without embarrassment.

“We had similar thoughts then because all I want is to see the look on your face from earlier.” He replied and slid one hand down over her ass with what was definitely intention.

Belly was again aware of how wet she was and could feel her nipples tighten as Jere’s hand moved to meet her skin. 

A thump on the door behind Jeremiah startled them both and was quickly followed by a jingle of keys. They sprang apart and hurried to get themselves in order, which they did in the nick of time as a security guard opened the door. 

“What are you kids doing in here?” He asked, clearly suspicious as they could not have looked very innocent. 

Belly thanked God for Jeremiah’s quick thinking as he replied, “Thank goodness you showed up! We got locked in! We’ve been yelling for help for ages!” 

The guard seemed momentarily surprised but then frowned at them and started to say, “The door locks from the inside.”

But Belly and Jere had the same thought and simply yelled out “Thank you!” and grabbing hands ran out before he could finish, laughing the whole way back to the car.

It seemed whatever happened they were destined to get interrupted but at least their timing was getting better, Belly thought happily to herself.

Chapter Text

And then there are days you must rest.

• Anonymous

Heart racing, stomach churning and head spinning, Belly stumbled into the bathroom and knelt on the cool tiles. Somehow their hard cold surface helped clear her mind for a second and she recognized she must have food poisoning…just before she was violently ill. 

Not sure how long she had been laying there as waves of nausea swept over her, her muscles locked up fighting shooting pain, she became aware that someone was opening the door. Embarrassed at her current state, not knowing who was there, she managed to croak out through her utterly dry lips, “Don’t come in, I’m sick.”

“Bells?” Was the muffled response, immediately making it clear it was Jeremiah. Belly groaned and curled into a tighter ball, not wanting him to see her in this state. But the groan had been a mistake it seemed.

His voice tinged with sudden urgency, Jere followed with, “Belly! Are you ok? I’m coming in.” 

Opening the door a crack, he slipped in and when he saw that she was laying on the floor, immediately dropped to his knees, one hand coming to rest on her shoulder to turn her and the other caressing her forehead. He was so gentle and she felt so badly, that tears immediately sprang to her eyes.

“What happened? What’s wrong?” Jeremiah whispered, stroking the damp strands of her hair off her face.

Even thinking about it brought on a wave of nausea but Belly managed to reply, “Food poisoning.”

More to himself than her, Jeremiah started to mumble through what she had eaten last night at the club. She heard him say something about some shrimp she’d had that no one else had and she felt like her whole body was convulsing. She barely managed not to wretch right onto Jere’s knees where they rested by her head. 

“I’m sorry Bells.” He responded softly when he realized his recounting wasn’t really helping. Belly tried to respond that it was ok but she was really afraid that if she opened her mouth things would get much worse. 

Breathing deeply through her nose for a few moments, she managed to slow her heart rate and calm her roiling stomach. She was achy from laying on the hard tile and, at the moment, was also freezing.

“Cold.” She managed to get out. 

Sweeping his hand down her bare arm, she could feel Jere grazing the goosebumps that had flared up. Fighting the urge to shiver a little, she focused on the warmth of his hand.

“I’ll be right back.” He whispered, with a light kiss on her temple and Belly felt herself relax slightly and let her eyes drift closed. 

Next thing she was aware of was a very soft and very large towel covering her and Jeremiah sitting down next to her. He had brought a small glass of, what she could tell even in her position, very cold water and a tube of what looked like lip balm. 

“Do you think you can sit up for a bit and try to take a sip of water?” He asked, resuming his stroking of her forehead and hair. 

Belly wasn’t sure she was up to it fully but it felt like for a moment she had a reprieve from the worst of the cramps and queasiness so she got her arm under herself and pushed to a sitting position. It hurt, everything hurt and she had to wrap the towel around herself to keep from actively shivering. 

Like she was a small child, Jeremiah held the frosted glass to her lips. She didn’t so much as take a sip as let a few drops slip into her mouth. It hadn’t happened often but she knew from experience that her body was so focused on getting rid of the bad stuff that it hadn’t even managed to tell her brain how thirsty and dehydrated she must be. She had to force herself to swallow even that small amount of water and then take another series of deep breaths to try to keep herself steady. 

Jere must have realized that was all she could do and put down the glass and picked up the lip balm to dab some on her chapped lips. She felt the tears well up again at how gentle he was being with her. He wasn't acting like she was gross, which she certainly was, and even his presence helped her relax.

When he was done, he asked, “How long have you been feeling like this?”

“A few hours I think?” She replied, her voice thready and hoarse.

“I wish you would have called for someone.” He replied, though she knew he meant him, “It’s awful to be sick like that alone for hours.”

Her stomach was starting to roll a bit, even from the small swallow of water, and she felt dizzy and awful. “Didn’t want you to see me like this.” She choked out. 

“I…” but Jeremiah didn’t get any further because she was struggling to get to the toilet, knowing she was about to be sick.

She tried to wave him off to leave, beyond embarrassed that she was about to throw up in front of him, but she couldn’t focus on it that much. Her body’s reaction was way beyond her control at this point. The towel slipped off her shoulders as she choked up the little bit of water she had managed to swallow. When she was able to stop gagging, she felt Jeremiah’s strong hands holding her hair from her face and methodically stroking her back. As she swallowed convulsively to soothe the burning in her throat and worked to get her breath back, she heard him mumbling soothingly, “It’s ok sweetheart. You’re ok. I’ve got you. It’s ok. I’m here.”

The rest of the night was grim, what felt like an endless cycle of exhaustion and sickness. However, Jeremiah never left her side unless it was to fetch water, a cool towel for her head or a pillow to make her as comfortable as he could. 

As watery dawn light started to show through the blinds, Belly lay with her head in his lap, his back against the wall and legs outstretched. He was rhythmically stroking her hair and at last Belly felt like the cramps and nausea were easing up. The warmth of his hand, the glide of his fingertips was so comforting, she thought she might actually fall asleep right on the bathroom floor. A tear slipped out of the corner of her eye and soaked into his shorts where her head was resting. The pressure of more tears was a lump in her already sore throat - not tears of pain or sickness like earlier, but instead of relief and gratitude that she was both starting to feel better and that she had someone like Jeremiah who cared about her this much. 

Another tear slid free and she whispered raspily, “Thank you for staying.”

Either half asleep or surprised she was awake, he started slightly when she spoke but replied quietly, “Of course Bells. I would never leave you alone this sick.”

“It was so gross though,” Belly found herself almost whining back, her embarrassment making her cringe slightly. 

But Jeremiah only laughed lightly and replied, “Believe me, I’ve seen worse. We all get sick sometimes. I was just glad to be here to help you the little I could.”

Belly’s heart swelled, not sure what she had done to deserve this boy, and the tears spilled a bit faster but she was too exhausted to even think of anything else to say other than, “Thank you” before she dozed off. 

When the bathroom door creaked open slightly a little or long while later, sunlight was still pale so Belly thought a little, she heard someone swallow a gasp. Opening her eyes, she saw her mom step into the bathroom.

“Bean, what happened?” she breathed quietly as she knelt down and helped Belly sit up. 

“I got food poisoning. I’ve been here all night - Jeremiah stayed with me.” Her mom looked over at where he was sleeping sitting up against the wall and cast a worried look back at Belly.

“Oh honey, why didn’t you yell for me or ask him to get me?” Laurel asked as she took her hand.

“I didn’t want to wake you.”

Laurel looked at her and then at Jeremiah and Belly could see her smiling a bit ruefully. “What am I going to do with you two?” She asked rhetorically and reached out and stroked Jeremiah’s curls gently and so…maternally…Belly thought to herself.

“I’m up.” Jeremiah said very sleepily and without opening his eyes. 

Belly and her mom locked eyes and both huffed out a laugh.

Laurel helped Belly to her feet and asked, “How are you feeling now?” 

“Much better, just really really tired… And gross.” Belly replied pulling her damp sleep tee away from her body. 

Laurel nodded and knelt down again, taking Jeremiah’s hand and rubbing it gently until he opened his eyes. “Jere, thank you for taking care of Belly. Why don’t you go get some sleep?”

Jeremiah rubbed his eyes, adorably, Belly thought to herself and managed to get up a bit stiffly. “You sure you’re ok, Bells?” he asked, kissing the top of her head. 

She looped her fingers around his wrist, just to feel his warmth for a second, and replied a bit shyly, “I’m good, go lay down.”

With one last kiss, he drifted out the door sleepily. Belly looked at her mom and found they were smiling at one another in what could only be called shared appreciation.

“That boy is something else.” Laurel finally remarked after some length, warmth very evident in her tone.

“For real.” Belly replied, and they both laughed as her mom helped her get the shower going so she could get cleaned off. 

The hot shower worked wonders and Belly felt like a new person as she walked back to her room gently towel drying her hair. Her body felt light and calm now that she was feeling better and clean - but she felt like she could sleep for a week.

As she thought to herself that she hoped Jeremiah was getting some rest, she opened her bedroom door and discovered he was. Rather than go to bed after helping her all night, her silly, sweet, frankly insane, boyfriend had gone to her room and changed all of the sheets so she wouldn’t have to sleep in sweaty dirty sheets from last night - and had promptly apparently laid down and fallen asleep. 

Belly didn’t realize it was possible for one’s heart to both feel like it was squeezing to a stop and racing at the same time but that’s exactly what she felt as she tiptoed close to him and peered down at his peaceful, beautiful face. Dropping the towel on the floor, she climbed into bed carefully and lay down on her side facing him. 

Reaching out, she twined one damp curl around her fingers - somehow he’d managed to take a shower and change her bedding - and then dropped her hand to cover his where it lay on the bed. Almost as a reflex his fingers twined around hers though he neither woke up or moved further - and Belly her exhaustion pull her into sleep.

Chapter Text

I was falling. Falling through time and space and stars and sky and everything in between. I fell for days and weeks and what felt like lifetime across lifetimes. I fell until I forgot I was falling. - Jess Rothenberg

The first thing she was conscious of was how warm and comfortable she felt. Though the day must be in full swing, even through her closed lids, Belly could tell someone had shut the curtains and her room remained in cool darkness with just the slightest sunlight peeking around the edges of the heavy curtains. She could still feel the tiredness from last night dragging at her but it was a cozy sort of tiredness with the comforter pressing down on her and a sense of warmth and calm. She heard no noise coming from downstairs - the thought that everyone must have gone out drifted across her partially conscious mind.

As awareness continued to slowly return, she realized the tip of her nose was brushing something slightly rough and that it wasn't a pillow wrapped in her arms but something much firmer and warmer and she peeped open one eye and tipped her head back slightly to see Jeremiah’s beautiful face, peaceful in sleep. It had been his stubbly jaw against which her nose brushed, his chest she was pressed against, his legs tangled with hers. At the realization, she couldn’t help the smile that curved her lips.

Belly leaned back a bit so she could really look at him, that knot under her ribs that pulled her toward him protesting at even the small distance. He looked so young sleeping and she had the oddest sense that she could see him at every age all at once - the Jeremiah of every summer lay over his features. He was the little boy who tugged her braid but brought her a cookie warm from the oven to make it up to her, the smiling friend playing cards to keep her out of the doldrums when she was sick, the gangly teenage boy tossing her in the pool and leaping in after her and he was the young man who’d sat on a cold, hard bathroom floor comforting and helping her all night. 

As all of those versions of him drifted through her memory, Belly realized clearly, perhaps for the first time, that even when she had had Conrad, the one person she had always thought she wanted, that she had needed Jeremiah. Even the thought made her cringe slightly, it sounded, even in her mind, so selfish, but she knew she couldn’t change it. That need for him had evolved - she had needed his care and friendship when she was young and his support and consideration as they grew up and now she needed…everything from him; his heart, his touch, maybe even his soul.

She felt a bit crazy and dramatic thinking this way, but now that they had opened the door for real, everything in her kept crying out for him, more of him, everything he could give her. And what was strange was that he seemed to need her just as much. He didn’t try to hide himself from her or lie to himself about how he felt - he was offering it to her openly and happily and it was clear all he wanted was the same. She wanted nothing more than to give that to him. As she had said to him weeks ago, she wanted something real and this felt more real than anything ever had.

As she lay quietly, these revelations crashing through her brain, Jeremiah’s eyes fluttered open and seeing her staring at him, he smiled sleepily and said, “Morning Bells, how’re you feeling?”

And really there was no other answer, so she simply replied, “I love you.”

Because he was Jere, he didn’t balk or deflect or tease her, but rather, with an almost imperceptible look of surprise, quickly overwhelmed by a deep pool of warmth,  he locked eyes with her and said, “I love you.” 

Belly leaned into his hand where he had reached out to cup her cheek, a shiver making its way down her spine when long fingertips grazed her neck. Taking a deep breath, he continued quietly, “I think I always have.”

Everyone had it wrong - they thought that Conrad challenged her and brought out her spark - but really she had loved him for so long and so much one-sidedly that it had been a quiet and deep thing - her first love, one she wouldn’t trade. But no one seemed to realize that it was Jeremiah who was imprinted on her very DNA, he was the air she breathed and he was not a desire she had for herself, he was simply integral to her very being.

He didn’t just bring out her spark, he set her on fire - and she didn’t want him to be in doubt of that one more second. Belly leaned forward and ungently pressed her mouth to his, she wanted the taste of him on her tongue and his breath in her lungs. Slanting his lips against hers, Jeremiah rolled them so his hard chest pressed against her breasts and he slid his hands up into her hair. 

The tension between them became a living thing. She could feel his breaths coming fast and light as he laid open mouth kisses along her jaw. She craved his full weight and wrapped her arms around his back pulling him more tightly against her, trying to catch her breath, grabbing fistfuls of his t-shirt in her hands. Too much cotton and not enough skin, every part of her seemed to be saying. 

Jeremiah’s hand slipped beneath her pajama top, almost ticklish, as he kissed beneath her jaw and down her neck. Though he had touched her before, this time it was like someone struck a match under her skin, the heat rolling along every nerve ending. Belly couldn’t even figure out where she wanted him to touch her, it was nearing sensory overload. His fingers grazed the underside of her breast and it abruptly all came into focus, that is where she wanted him - tugging, stroking and sucking.

Because he was Jeremiah, he pulled away to look at her to ensure she wanted this, and at her almost curt nod, used both large beautiful hands to sweep her shirt up and over her head. And again, because he was Jeremiah, he knew what she needed and immediately sucked one pebbled nipple into his mouth. 

It was like a lightning bolt to her core, she felt her body clench, aching for more stimulation. But first, she had to get his shirt off, she needed to feel his warm skin against her. The loss of his mouth on her for a moment was almost painful but he took the opportunity to switch his attention to her other breast.

Belly dug her fingers into his curls and lightly scratched down the back of his neck, earning a groan that set her tingling. She loved that her touches made him feel so good, even small ones. She went to repeat the motion but she had to reach because Jeremiah had begun kissing down her sternum, over the gentle softness of her belly, and right to the waistband of her pajamas, all the while gently stroking cupping and stroking her breast. 

Belly felt like she was going to stop breathing as he trailed wet kisses along the edge of her pants, she thought she knew where this was going but no one had ever gone down on her before and she felt a tiny wriggle of apprehension even alongside a surge of even more intense desire. 

Jeremiah hooked his fingers in her waistband and…paused. He breathed warmly on her skin, damp from his kisses and then looked up her body, right into her eyes, and after a moment said quietly, “All I want is to put my mouth on you, Bells. But I don’t want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable.”

That tiny bit of fear she had, the twist in her belly that wasn’t arousal, didn’t so much as unravel as it went up in flames at the love and trust in his eyes, and she breathed out, “I want you to. I want you to so much I can barely think straight.”

Until that moment, intensity had carried them both along but at her response, Jeremiah had let a playful, boyish and maybe a little bit wicked a smile twist his lips before he slid her pajama bottoms and underwear off and positioned himself between her spread legs, his strong arms cradling her thighs.

However, he didn’t immediately do anything but look. Apprehension almost seized her again at the incredibly intimate position - she was very wet and she could feel where it was seeping out - and she was afraid maybe it was a bit much. But then Jeremiah slid one index finger along the seam of her lips, dragging the wetness along and it was impossible to feel embarrassed or apprehensive. He didn’t rush, he didn’t push, it was just the lightest of touches. 

“You’re so beautiful, Belly.” He remarked, voice even, almost conversational, like he wasn’t inches from her most intimate body part and she wasn’t panting in need.

His other hand joined in and he stroked his thumbs along each side of her, spreading her wetness more and beginning to open her to him just a little bit. Her clit felt like it was pulsing and pushing, in a hurry to receive some of his gentle attention.

“Every part of you.” Now he sounded mesmerized, and was stroking deeper and deeper between her lips but still not touching her where she was desperate for him. 

“Your skin is so soft.” He continued and placed a kiss on her pubic bone, then a kiss at each spot where her thigh met her center and then one fingertip slipping down to tease at her entrance. Belly was mesmerized, his words and his touch combined making her feel like she was floating.

“I just want to taste you.” He said and quickly flattened his tongue to lick a stripe from her entrance to her clit, sliding his finger all the way inside her - it sent her arching against the bed chasing his incredible mouth. 

“It’s better than I imagined.” He murmured against her body and then sealed his mouth over her clit and alternately sucked and licked, adding a second finger stroking her rhythmically in time with the work of his tongue. 

She could no more have uttered a word than she could have sat up and began playing the violin. Her entire world had narrowed to the feel of Jeremiah’s mouth and hands on and in her. Belly shoved her hands into her own hair and reached down to tweak one nipple, his touches, his words had her so turned on that when he pulled her tight to his mouth, pressing one hand down on her belly over where his other hand was pumping inside her, and sucked hard on her clit, her vision whited out and a small scream escaped her lips as she tumbled into an incredible orgasm. 

When she came back to her senses, she looked down to see Jere gently stroking her through the aftermath. He pressed one more gentle kiss against her and then panther-crawled up her body coming to rest mostly on top of her - she approved of the position as it allowed her to immediately wrap her arms around him. The look on his face was one of incredible tenderness but Belly could see the intensity still flickering in his eyes like blue flames. 

As her body calmed down a bit, she felt that slight hint of embarrassment return and shyly said, “You didn’t have to do that.”

His loving smile immediately turned wolfish and he replied, “Of course not...but I really fucking wanted to.”

That response surprised a bark of laughter out of her and she leaned her face up for a kiss, to show she wanted to be brave. Jere obliged and Belly was surprised at the taste of herself on his lips - it really wasn’t unpleasant and maybe it wasn’t just him being unselfish.

“Wait…so you really wanted to? Not just for me?” She asked a bit skeptically.

Jeremiah groaned and rolled his hips where they were cradled between her own - his sleep shorts and boxers doing nothing to hide the long firm pressure of him. Belly swallowed a surprised and slightly overstimulated…but not uninterested…squeak when his erection grazed her clit. 

Leaning close to her face and kissing her lips, nose, cheeks and lips again lightly, Jeremiah breathed out, “I’ve been dreaming of doing that for, quite literally, years. I could tell you it was entirely for you but I’d be lying. I love knowing I could turn you on that much, I love seeing you come apart, I love the taste of you - like the taste of your skin but more, better, a thousand times amplified - but I also find it an incredible turn on to bury my face in a pussy.”

Belly felt herself flush - she and Jeremiah had always had no secrets but that didn’t mean she wasn’t a bit surprised at his bluntness. She also wasn’t quite sure whether she was turned on or jealous that he had enough experience doing this to know how much he liked it and it made her feel shy again. She shifted her gaze away from his. She wanted to keep going into this new territory but still felt uncertain - thankfully, he didn’t let her pull away. 

“Nothing, literally nothing, compares to going down on the person I love though.” He continued, fingertips stroking along each side of her jaw where he cradled her face - it felt like he was putting a spell on her, all of her jealousy and embarrassment floating away. “And the person I know loves me.” He finished in what sounded like awe. 

The spell complete, Belly found herself smiling dreamily up at him, wondering vaguely what was going on with her wildly varying emotions and reached up and wound her hands into his curls. “Oh yeah? Who is that?” She asked, letting playfulness creep into her voice.

Matching her tone, Jere replied, “Some beautiful girl I woke up in bed with, who, the second I opened my eyes, told me she loved me when I’ve been fighting every moment not to let those words pop out of my mouth too soon in case I scared her off.”

Belly let her competitive streak take over and sticking out her tongue, sing-songed, “Iiiiii beeeaaaattt youuuu!”

“Oh yeah?!” He replied laughing, and immediately dug his fingers into her sides, tickling her mercilessly. And though she wiggled for a moment, it quickly passed when Belly felt her nipples graze Jeremiah’s chest and her squirming pushed her suddenly very warm center more firmly against where he was still somehow rock hard.

She knew he felt it too when the laughter died in his throat, his tickling turned into a caress and he very intentionally rolled his hips to recreate the sensation. Belly was suddenly extremely aware she was entirely naked and Jeremiah still had his shorts on. 

Reaching up to swipe her thumb over his full bottom lip, she locked eyes with him and casually stated, “It’s very quiet downstairs.”

Jeremiah seemed to barely breathe, his body pressed into her own, and replied with studied casualness, “I think everyone went out about half an hour ago.”

Raising her face for a kiss, Jere obliged immediately and kissed her deeply and wetly, though still gently, and she almost lost track of her own thoughts. They moved against each other and she could feel her body warming and almost melting into his. Belly knew she could come again just from how they were moving together - almost as intimate as she wanted…almost.

“Jeremiah,” she finally managed to gasp between kisses. “Would you please take off your pants?”

If it had been at all a different moment or a laughing matter, she knows they both would have chuckled over her asking this way, but not at this moment and not with the desperation in her voice. Jere nodded and reached his hand to the waistband of his shorts and with a bit of her help, pushed them down and off. 

Belly quickly wrapped both arms around him and pulled his body back against hers. He had seemed like he was about to shift from his position between her legs to the side to give her some space, and she just couldn’t have that. As their hips clicked back into place like two puzzle pieces, Jere inhaled sharply, clearly trying to control himself. 

Belly sighed in pleasure at the feeling of his warmth coming to rest against her core, especially now that there was nothing between them. She skated one hand up between his shoulder blades and the other she moved down boldly over one perfect butt cheek and grabbing, she pressed Jeremiah even more tightly against her. 

His dick twitched and she found herself very interested in raising both her knees a bit higher to catch it in a slick, slide, drag.

“Bellsssss,” Jeremiah growled warningly as he tried to keep still, “this is getting dangerous.”

“How so?” Belly replied, faking innocence. Her focus on talking was quickly flagging and she rolled her hips to recreate the sensation, causing him to groan softly.

Jeremiah rested his forehead against her shoulder and she could feel the puff of his breath as he panted against her and said, desperation in his tone, “Belly…please, I’d do anything to make you feel good..but let’s just…cool down a bit and…”

“I don’t want to cool down.” She heard herself reply gently but adamantly.

Hips seemingly shifting against his will again, he replied, “If we don’t, I’m gonna come Bells.”

It finally clicked that he was trying to protect her, that he wasn’t sure she was ready and he was trying to give her an out before things went too far. Feeling her heart swell, she placed her hands on his face and raised him up to look at her, and tried to let her love for him show in her face. 

Making herself focus and wanting to be extremely clear on her consent, she stated simply, “Jeremiah, I want this. I want you, inside me. I would absolutely never force you if you weren’t ready but please don’t be scared you’re forcing me.”

A current of understanding flowed between them, and Jeremiah replied gently, “I want you so much Bells. You’re all I want. But we don’t have a condom.”

Marveling how easy it was for them to talk, how even awkward situations felt silly and sweet rather than uncomfortable, Belly let out a laugh at the sheer joy and absurdity of it all and answered teasingly, “Yes we do. Right in my bedside table.”

Jeremiah’s eyes went wide in shock but he mirrored her own silly happiness and planting a smacking kiss on her lips said, “Isabel Conklin, you little minx!” and then used his long arm to reach over and slip the foil packet out of her nightstand. 

Sitting up on his heels, Jere grinned down at her and ripped open the package. Belly couldn’t say she minded this view, it was entirely new to see Jere almost displayed for her. For what felt like the thousandth time, she thought to herself how gorgeous he was from his broad shoulders, to his chocolate bar abs, strong thighs with a dusting of golden hair and now even to where he was rolling the condom on, hard as a rock - she was in awe. Feeling a bit drunk on the fact that she was the one who had gotten him into that state made her own entirely displayed nakedness feel powerful and sexy rather than uncomfortable. 

She was so incredibly turned on again between their closeness and seeing him that she was ready to grab him and roll him over, to sit across his perfect hips and feel him stretch her as he slid inside, but Jere had other plans. While she contemplated this, he walked his hands back up next to her sides and came to rest in their previous position, cock immediately slipping not inside but close, grazing her clit and making her moan. 

Instead of becoming increasingly frenzied, it felt like Jeremiah was slowing everything down. He kissed her, languidly, deeply, while stroking her hair, face, neck. He slid fingertips along her collarbone, raising goosebumps in his wake and slotted his long fingers between her ribs, thumb just barely caressing her breast. All the while minutely shifting his hips back and forth, side to side. She could feel the condom becoming slick with her own wetness and squirmed, wanting more. 

When he gently pinched her nipple, mouth fused to her own, Belly felt her center clench involuntarily and she mewled in frustration - a sound deep in her throat. Smiling against her lips, Jeremiah slid his hand from the back of her knee, up her thigh, lifting and bending it so he could press against her even more securely and then cupping her ass.

“Jeeeereeee,” she heard herself whine. It made him smile again. 

“Are you in a bit of a rush?” He replied rhetorically. 

Pinning him with her glare, her adoring, half-insane-from-need glare, Belly replied clearly and seriously, “Please get inside me right now.”

Something about her directness seemed to send Jeremiah from slow and dreamy to intense in a flash and he pulled back slightly and, watching her face the whole time, pushed inside her inch by delicious inch. Belly wanted to keep watching him but she felt her eyes roll back and lids close as he stretched her open. It felt so good and when he settled deep in her body, as deep as he could go, she almost felt like she could come from that alone. But Jere had other plans and he started moving.

Each time Jeremiah pushed into her, it was like a spark igniting her body - moving from where his pubic bone pressed against her, up to the base of her spine and arching through the rest of her body. Belly wanted it to last forever but could feel her orgasm coiling inside her like a spring already. She ran her hands over every inch of him she could - stroking, pulling, pushing - and she could tell he was close too as his movements became more unpredictable. 

Arching up to kiss him, Belly and Jeremiah shared breath, a millimeter of space between them. Feeling for a moment like time was standing still, they whispered their love for one another into the tiny space left between their lips - and fusing their mouths together crashed over the edge - also together. 

For a brief moment, Belly blacked out and when she came to she was utterly aware of the full length of Jere still pressed against her, warm and comforting. His breaths were soft against her neck - their perfect closeness almost even more intimate than the moments before. She felt peaceful and so happy that absurd tears pricked at her eyes. 

She realized her breath must have hitched when Jeremiah pulled back and worriedly asked, “Oh Bells, did I hurt you?”

Not being able to stop herself, Belly laughed and cried simultaneously, and reached up to cup his adored face, “No, you didn’t hurt me. The furthest thing from it. I’m just so happy.”

For a moment Jeremiah seemed utterly bemused by her reaction but slipping out of her body, shifted to lay down at her left side and pulled her close. “Me too.”

There didn’t seem much to say after that, they simply laid there looking at each other, kissing gently and letting the blanket of joy rest over them with little to no thought. After a while, or maybe only a few minutes, Jere got up to clean up, dispose of the condom and pulled on his discarded boxers and a tee shirt. 

Happily exhausted, Belly laid, starfish-style, and contemplated simply falling asleep. Jere’s weight tipped the bed again and stroking her face he said, “Belly, I know you’re tired but you should go pee…and honestly probably get your PJs back on before everyone comes home.”

Knowing he was right, she got up, threw on her clothes and basically ran to the bathroom and back as fast as she could. Smiling hugely, she threw herself back into the bed and in one move pulled the covers over the two of them and snuggled her body right into Jeremiah’s side. She felt him press a kiss to her hair and tipped her head back from one more brush of their lips and abruptly fell soundly back to sleep.

Not sure what woke her sometime later, Belly opened her eyes to late afternoon sunshine and finally felt rested. Jeremiah was already awake, softly stroking her hair with one hand and holding open a small paperback in the other. 

“Finally awake, sleepyhead?” He asked in a quiet drawl looking down at her, his ocean eyes sparkling. 

“Hmmm.” She replied noncommittally, “What time is it?”

“About 2:30. Everyone just got back. We should probably get up and go downstairs.” 

“Do we have to?” Belly pouted.

Dropping the book on the nightstand, Jere half rolled her over and locked his arms around her, “Sadly, I think so.” 

He kissed both her cheeks, her nose and finally her lips and said, “I told you that if I started kissing you I wouldn’t ever be able to stop.”

Then giving her a cheeky smile, he hopped out of bed. Belly smiled widely, remembered she was pretending to be grumpy - groused a bit, stretched and followed him. At the top of the stairs, Jeremiah reached back for her hand and taking it, they went downstairs together. 

Belly realized she wasn’t sure what today or the next few months or years would bring but with their connection a living, breathing thing between them, she knew they she would never hide how she felt about him again and that they would face whatever came next together.