Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Castiel stares at the pale face of his late mate. It's still not fully sunk in that he's gone. It's completely surreal. Just a week ago, he was full of life, tickling Jack until their little boy was wheezing.

Castiel's mother squeezes his shoulder, a sympathetic smile lying on her face. She probably thinks her son is mourning his mate, the one she chose for him all those years ago. But Castiel doesn't mourn his mate like his mother once grieved over hers. He feels nothing. Not even relief. It's probably his empty bond. It itches in his chest, reaching out to connect to the other side. It will heal. He didn't have to suffer when it snapped. At first, he didn't even realise that something had changed. They weren't in love, not even friends, really. It was only a blood bond, not one connecting their souls.

It can happen, of course, a blood bond growing into more over time, but Castiel and his mate never clicked like that. Castiel did his duty, offered his mate a home, birthed him pups, and was the good omega he was expected to be. In return, his mate brought home money, sometimes played with the kids. They hadn't even dated before they bonded, just two leftover wolves their families were both just too happy to have finally coupled in their mid to late twenties.

Standing here, next to his mate's open coffin, all he misses is the presence of his children. His mate's family is traditional – no kids allowed at the wake. It's probably for the best. Claire, his seven-year-old daughter, cried bitter tears when he told her that her alpha father had died. Jack, his four-year-old preschooler, is still too young to fully grasp it. He's been swinging from being his usual sunshine self to not letting go of his papa, afraid Castiel might disappear as well, and back again.

Castiel's heart aches for his children. They deserved to grow up with both parents. His mate wasn't exactly affectionate with him, but he loved their pups. And he loved Castiel because he had given birth to them. And because it was his duty as his alpha.

Love is a weird concept for Castiel. Of course, he knows all different kinds of love. He loves his children, his best friend Kelly, his mother and siblings. He was devoted to his mate. But his love for him wasn't the one shown in movies. He never swooned over his handsomeness, even though he wasn't half-bad looking for Western standards. He simply was a little dull, but that would describe him too, Castiel supposes.

Still, more than once, other omegas tried to steal his mate away. Castiel knows some managed to, temporarily. Castiel doesn't care much. It suited him well. His mate didn't make advances in the bedroom anymore, didn't demand more pups from him. A pack of four is rather unusual in their circles. Castiel has thirteen siblings, his mate had ten. But Castiel birthed singletons both times. He and his alpha weren't compatible enough for more.

"He was a good man," Castiel's mother says. Castiel nods. He was. He didn't hit him, didn't force himself on him. That's more than he could have hoped for when they tied the knot.

The bite on his neck has started to fade already. Another week or two, and it will be gone, his neck as virginal as Castiel had been on their wedding night. It will likely stay that way for the rest of his life. What alpha would want him? An omega in his thirties, bound to two kids. Not that he wants another mate anyway. Widowerhood has its perks. The insurance company will pay off his house, his widower's and the half-orphan's pensions will keep them afloat. His mate took good care of preparing for his death, even though he surely didn't expect to leave this world so early.

An embolism. His mate died watching football. Something he loved and Castiel never got into. If he had, maybe he could have saved him, but he lay in their nest, snuggling sleeping Jack and scrolling through his phone before drifting off to sleep. It is what it is.

Castiel quirks a smile at his mother's words. All things considered, his mate was a good man. He not once raised his voice. He trusted Castiel to raise their pups right. They didn't talk much but his presence was a comfortable one. Castiel was as happy as a bound omega could be.

Castiel tugs on his leather collar, the tightness grounding him. The priest will take it off him after the funeral, in front of family and friends. Modern families don't do the public uncollaring anymore. They often don't collar the younger generation of omegas either. It's seen as antiquated. Those omegas aren't property anymore. They choose their own mates, sometimes only marry and don't blood bond, have kids out of wedlock, even pair up with other omegas or betas. Castiel doesn't get the appeal. It only makes everything so much harder. But maybe it's because he doesn't know anything else.

Being with his mate was easy. Being a widower might be easy, too. He'll miss him, of course – the empty milk carton in the fridge, his shoes staining the entrance hall, the routine goodnight kiss pressed against his temple. Castiel loved his mate, not fierce and passionate, but quiet, like a creek flowing through grassy grounds. Castiel belonged to him. Castiel was his property. He loved him like a dog loves his master, waiting for his return every night. Now, he'll only have the kids to wait for. And he'll be emancipated at last, a new law freeing all widowed omegas from being owned. He's pretty sure his mother is seething.

"My heartfelt condolences," an omega in her twenties says, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. Her sweet scent stings in Castiel's nose. It is sharp around the edges, like caramel that has been left too long on the stove. She's in mourning. Everyone here is. But she smells sadder than Castiel himself. Well, he had always prided himself on having his scent under tight control, at least in closed spaces. The omega next to him clearly didn't work on it as hard as he did. His mate found his scent unappealing. It happens with arranged bonds. Not every alpha likes every omega's scent. Castiel could stand his mate's. It wasn't enticing but it was alright.

"Thank you," Castiel says to the strange omega. "Did you know my mate?"

The woman blushes. It tells Castiel everything he needs to know.

"We were colleagues," she croaks.

Castiel nods. He doesn't ask for her name. His mate never mentioned a female coworker. It should be humiliating, but Castiel can't find it in himself to care. His mate is dead. Jealousy won't bring him anything but added grief.

"I'm sure you'll miss him very much," he says.

She nods. "We all do."

Castiel closes his eyes for a long moment, then turns fully to her.

"Thank you for coming," he says and walks to his place in the front row.

The funeral service passes by in a blur. It is tasteful and appreciating of a short, yet well-lived life.

His brother Gabriel drives him home, unusually quiet. Castiel is grateful for it. He's heard enough platitudes for a lifetime. Yes, he's sad, but he isn't heartbroken. Maybe it makes him a bad person, but it is what it is. He's always been rather rational. A trait omegas supposedly don't have. But he was never a cliché omega. He finished high school and went to college, then held a good job for a few years. He mated late. His parents had to invest in a proper dowry to get him bonded. No one wanted a tall, stubborn omega like him, one who insisted on not giving up his own name, at least, if he had to give up everything else.

"Papa!" Jack calls when Castiel pushes the front door of his house open. The boy flies into his arms. Castiel cuddles him close and breathes in his pup's scent.

"Did you have fun with Auntie Kelly?" he asks.

"We drawed a picture of Daddy," Jack says.

"That's wonderful," Castiel replies around the sudden lump in his throat. "Do you want to put it next to his portrait? The guests will arrive soon."

The boy nods, and they walk into the living room, a buffet already set up at the side. Not that Castiel craves food. Omegas usually don't after their mate dies. It's all part of the biological reset, to starve off a potential pregnancy and prepare the omega for a new bond. Not that Castiel would have to worry about any of those things.

"Where is Claire?" he asks, pressing a kiss on Kelly's cheek. His old friend from omega college gives him a sad smile.

"She's up in her room."

Castiel nods in understanding and helps Jack to pin his drawing next to his father's photograph.

"This is beautiful, Jackie. Dad would be so proud of you."

"Can I show him later?" the boy asks. Castiel bites the inside of his cheek. This is going to be the hardest part – helping his children through their grief.

"Of course," he murmurs and sinks on one knee to pull his son into his side. "Daddy will always look down from heaven and marvel at your artworks." He presses a kiss into Jack's hair and gets up to his feet.

"I'll check on Claire," he tells Kelly, who takes Jack's hand.

"Take as long as you need. We'll find something to do, won't we?" she asks the boy. He nods happily. Castiel's heart clenches at the sight. He was his age when his own father died. He can barely remember him. Castiel isn't sure if that's a good thing or if it is what made him the way he is today. Jack is already so much like him. For the first time since his birth, Castiel wishes he weren't.

He drags himself up the stairs and knocks on Claire's door. His daughter doesn't answer so he pushes it open after a few seconds. Loud music comes from her CD player that doesn't seem to befit this sombre day. But kids mourn differently. As long as it helps her through this passage, she can listen to electro music and Disney songs as much as she likes.

"Hey, honey," he greets his daughter who is working on a Lego set Kelly bought her. "That's beautiful," he says and sits down on her bed.

Claire doesn't look up from the chipmunk in front of her, her upper lip pulled between her teeth in concentration. She used to watch the Disney show with her dad, who was a nostalgic person when it came to television. Castiel doubts that Kelly knew that, but her gift is strangely fitting.

He glances at the box. "This set is for older kids. Is it hard?" he asks.

Claire scoffs the way only a grade-schooler can. Castiel huffs a laugh, his face finally free to morph into a genuine smile. Claire has always found Lego for her age way too easy. Her godmother knows her well.

"I made a mistake earlier, but I fixed it," she says.

"You're gonna be a great builder one day," Castiel says. "Just like your dad."

Claire's shoulders slump for a moment before she straightens herself again. "If I present right," she murmurs. It breaks Castiel's heart. She always said she wanted to become an architect like her alpha father. There had never been a doubt until now.

"You can be whatever you wanna be, Claire," Castiel says. "You will go to the best schools. Dad made a college fund for both of you. He'd never have let his children go short."

Claire stares at the half-built Chip in her hand.

"Dad? Yes. But our new alpha?"

Castiel's face falls. "What makes you think I will mate again?" he asks.

"Grandma asked Uncle Gabe if he knew a single alpha looking for a mate."

Castiel breathes a sigh. "You're not supposed to eavesdrop," he reprimands her gently.

"I didn't. I just wanted to get a yoghurt from the fridge."

Castiel nods in understanding.

"Well, you don't need to worry about that. I don't think I'll ever mate again. And if I should, then only someone who will respect my opinions about how to raise and support my children. You have nothing to worry about, okay?"

Claire nods, tears making her eyes glitter. Castiel opens his arms, and after a moment of hesitation, she accepts his offer and steps between his legs for a hug. Castiel holds her for a long moment until she slumps into his arms, then pulls her onto his lap.

"Why couldn't we come to the wake?" Claire asks, pressing her face into the crook of his neck.

Castiel sighs. "Family tradition from back home. And it's boring anyway. The adults talk all the time, and everyone is supposed to be quiet and sit still during the funeral service. But I thought we could visit Daddy's grave tonight, after everyone's gone. What do you think?"

Claire nods against his neck, her tears damping his skin there. Castiel pulls his little daughter closer.

"Daddy loved you so, so much, and he would be so proud of his warrior princess."

That unravels the girl. She had always worried about one of them dying, and Castiel always promised they wouldn't. But his mate did. It's not fair that Claire and Jack will have to grow up without the guidance and love of their alpha father. But they'll make it somehow. Castiel needs to be strong for his children. And he will be. Of course, he will.

Chapter Text

Seven months later

Castiel pulls himself out from between his children pressing against him in their nest. They've been sleeping like this since their alpha died. It gives them comfort. Castiel doesn't fight it. Claire needs it, and Jack doesn't know anything else.

Castiel is coping rather well, he thinks. There are no complaints from school, and the house is in top condition. He volunteers at the soup kitchen because the grief counsellor his mother forced him to see, hoping her son would see reason and find a new mate, suggested socialising with other adults. It is exhausting. Adulting is exhausting. Every night, Castiel falls asleep while putting his children to bed. And without exception, his eyes blink open at 5.30, giving him an hour before his kids need to get up. It's his time. The calm before the storm.

Castiel puts ground coffee in the machine and pulls out his journal. Another suggestion by his counsellor. In the beginning, he found it a stupid idea. He wasn't grieving the way a good mate should. Sure, he missed him. But he was way too focused on his kids to allow himself to feel anything but love and worry for them. It's in this early hour, his pen pressed against the lined paper, that he works through his thoughts and feelings. And when he puts them away and turns the key of the drawer he hides the journal in, he locks away these emotions, too.

Today, he is angry. It's an emotion he rarely allows himself. It's so destructive, and it always makes him feel stuck. It needs a bit until he can pinpoint where this feeling is coming from.

Claire's therapist told him yesterday that she needs a stronger hand and that he recommended sending her to the alpha mentor programme of their community centre. He probably only meant well, but Castiel didn't hear his care. All he heard was that he wasn't good enough at guiding his daughter, despite all of his efforts.

Both kids get counselling. He's driving two towns over for them to have proper therapy with a children's specialist. Then Claire's field hockey training and games, Jack's swimming classes, church (always in their Sunday best), freshly cooked meals, quality time and bedtime stories, weekly trips to the cemetery to leave fresh flowers on his mate's grave… The list goes on, and on, and on. He's doing everything, but it still isn't enough. Simply because he isn't an alpha.

Castiel tries not to let it get to him, but it's hard when you work your butt off and another person, just because of their second gender, is supposed to have what your children truly need.

He knows it is sexist to an extent, but he was raised with these beliefs too. It's hard to shake them off when someone thinks he's lacking.

He pulls out the leaflet Claire's therapist gave him. It informs him about the importance of the presence of alphas in every kid's life and cites a few studies that show reduced stress levels in infants and overall better health when they have alphas around compared to not. Castiel doesn't know if they are valid but the project is sponsored by the state.

And it's true. His kids are mostly surrounded by omegas and betas. Claire has an alpha PE teacher, that's about it. It's not on purpose. Most of Castiel's alpha siblings live further away, Gabriel is travelling a lot, and alpha teachers are more interested in teaching middle and high school.

The programme looks fun, though his own memories stifle his excitement a little. His mother sent him to summer camps led by alphas. They are probably the reason why he refused to mate for so long. These people used their alpha voice all the time, until his whole body felt like it wasn't his own anymore. And that even before he presented at sixteen.

But that was two decades ago. This is different. The brochure talks about fun outdoor activities, crafting projects and scenting items for the family nest. The latter feels a little daunting. A strange alpha's scent in his nest? Castiel's omega doesn't like the idea at all. Their nest smells perfect, like him and his pups. He doesn't even have stuff from friends and family in it. Their scents are enough.

But it's not an all-or-nothing project. He can pick and choose. It would give him a breather too, so what does he have to lose? Why not let people think he can't handle it without an alpha? He knows he can. He's strong and capable. His kids are great. This is just the icing on a perfectly fine cake. He'll call the number on the leaflet as soon as he's dropped the kids off at school.

Seven months later

Castiel is glad that it's warm enough for the first meet-up to take place outside. Even here in the warm spring air, the smell of alpha is strong. In a room, Castiel would surely develop a headache.

Jack jumps up and down happily, excited for what's to come. Claire, on the other hand, looks warily at the alpha-filled booths scattered over the lawn in front of the town hall.

"Will we search for eggs?" Jack asks.

"No," Castiel chuckles. "It's not Easter, honey. We're looking for an alpha mentor for you and Claire. Remember?"

Jack nods excitedly.

"Claire-bear, don't pull such a face," Castiel says. "It's going to be fun."

Claire scowls at him, so he leaves her be. He registers them and accompanies them to the first booth with a nice alpha lady welcoming them and inviting the kids to a can knock down. He watches the kids interact with her. She's nice, rather petite and bubbly for an alpha, but Claire falls in love with her instantly. No wonder. Charlie has Claire's favourite superhero on her shirt. Castiel has to drag her away as other kids want to meet the redheaded alpha, too.

They've made it through half a dozen alpha volunteers when a scent hits Castiel like a ton of bricks: a slowly burning campfire and the velvety aroma of Castiel's favourite whisky that he hasn't had in years, being the main carer for his pups. He sways a little, his head dizzy from his wolf running circles in his reptilian brain.

"Papa?" Claire calls, sounding alarmed. That pulls his omega's focus from the enticing scent to his distressed pup.

"What's wrong?" Castiel asks, still reeling from the sudden shift of his inner wolf.

Claire looks up at him, the awe playing out on her face somewhere between fear and mesmerisation.

"Your eyes are golden," she whispers, her voice barely audible.

Castiel freezes. His hands tighten around his children's, and he turns in panic, dragging his pups in the other direction, away from the scent that is tugging on every fibre of his being. His wolf howls loudly over the sound of blood rushing through his ears.

"Papa!" Jack whines. "I wanna whack the mole," he complains, leveraging his 40 lbs. against his father's direction. It stops Castiel's drive. He makes the mistake of looking back at said booth and the alpha standing behind the counter. The man's red eyes meet his golden ones. The alpha's lips curl into the most blinding smile Castiel has ever seen.

The poor man. He's so beautiful. His alpha could have every omega he'd want.

His.

Castiel looks at the man with sad eyes, the alpha's face falling in response. The man looks young, younger than him at least. Too young to throw his life away for a widowed omega with small pups. What was fate thinking of putting them together at this point in their lives? True mates meet young. For good reasons.

"I'm sorry," Castiel mouths, wanting nothing more than to flee, but his wolf doesn't allow him to move anymore. He's rooted to the spot, both kids tearing at his hands.

"Papa, you're scaring me," Claire says. "What is happening?"

Castiel opens his mouth and closes it again. What is he supposed to say? Their father died only a few months ago. He promised Claire not to mate on a whim. But true mates don't wait. They are created for each other, meant to be; one, like two sides of the same coin.

He can hear the gasps from the people around them. Some are surely expecting a good show. But they have no idea that Castiel has never allowed his wolf to run free, that he's always managed to keep his instincts under tight control. He didn't even take a break for his last heat. He worked through it with painkillers and other medication, only asking Kelly to pick up the kids from school. He for sure won't bond in front of all of these people and his pups, no matter if it's legal or not.

His alpha leaves his booth and slowly closes the distance between them. His scent is calling Castiel like a siren, tugging on the loose seams of his soul, promising eternal happiness.

The alpha stops in front of him, their noses just inches apart.

"Omega?" he says, the smile back on his lips. He looks high. Castiel would laugh if it weren't so serious. The man could claim him right here, right now, in front of his children and everyone, and he'd probably let him, the pheromones already making his knees grow weak. Castiel locks them stubbornly and swallows hard. From up close, he can see the freckles dusting the alpha's face, can taste his scent on his tongue. It takes all of Castiel's strength not to drop to his knees and submit, to offer his neck and his life, his barely claimed independence.

"Alpha?" he presses out.

The man's smile grows impossibly wider, chocolate mixing into his scent.

"Mmh, marshmallows and… what is that?" the alpha asks.

"Ho–honeycomb," Castiel presses out, cheeks filling with warmth.

"You smell divine," the alpha whispers.

"So do you," Castiel croaks.

"Papa?" Jack asks. That breaks the spell Castiel's scent has laid on the other man. The alpha looks down at Jack, then at Claire, both kids gaping up at him.

"Are you married?" the alpha asks, his voice wavering. Castiel shakes his head.

"Widowed," he says. "I'm so sorry, Alpha."

The man shakes his head. "For what?"

"Maybe we should get away from the crowd and talk?" Castiel suggests, his wolf yelling at him not to talk but kiss already.

The alpha inhales deeply, a pleased look spreading over his face. "Whatever you want, sunshine."

This makes Castiel swoon. He's never swooned in his life. He's not a swooning omega. He isn't!

"Charlie?" the alpha calls, not taking his red eyes off Castiel. It should frighten the omega but it strangely doesn't.

"Yes, Dean?" the alpha from earlier replies.

"Could you look after these beautiful pups for a moment?"

Castiel doesn't even protest, his wolf trusting the man in front of him already. Even with his children, which should set off all alarm bells. Or not. Destiny and all that.

"Claire and Jack, right?" Charlie asks. "Do you like waffles?"

The kids gaze up at their father. He nods his permission. He looks after the three as they walk over to a booth with an alpha he recognises as his dentist.

"Hey," his alpha, Dean, says and takes his hand. "Are you okay?"

Castiel huffs a laugh. "I don't think I am."

That elicits the third most beautiful laughter Castiel has ever heard.

"Come," Dean says and tugs on his hand. "Let's get away from curious eyes."

Castiel allows his mate to pull him to a vintage car parked at the roadside. They end up leaning against the hood, smiling shyly at each other.

"What's your name, sweetheart?" Dean asks.

The omega chuckles nervously. "Castiel. I'm sorry, Dean. You must be so disappointed."

"Disappointed? You're freaking hot!" Dean exclaims.

Castiel narrows his eyes. "I have pups," he says.

"And you lost your mate," Dean remembers, his face growing serious. "How long has it been?"

"Seven months."

"That's… recent. My deepest condolences."

Castiel quirks a sad smile. "It was a shock, but we've managed well so far."

Dean nods. "My mom died when I was four."

"Jack was four when it happened. Claire was seven. Listen, Dean… You don't have to do this. I'm not a jackpot. I'm completely aware of that. I'm not…" He exhales raggedly. Dean's perfect scent makes it hard to think.

"You're my mate," Dean says, "but if you don't want me, I get it."

Castiel shakes his swimming head. Pheromones are one hell of a drug.

"I want…" Castiel wets his lips on instinct. He's not a well-groomed omega, his hair always messy and his lips often chapped. Dean would probably hate his looks if he weren't high right now. The alpha's hair is perfect, and his lips look enticingly soft. Castiel would bet they taste as sweet as he smells right now.

"Can I kiss you?" Dean asks. Castiel's wolf answers with a content purr before reason can get in the way. Dean's animal sends a rumble in Castiel's direction. And then, their lips meet for the first time.

Castiel's hand cards through Dean's hair of its own accord. This is bliss Castiel didn't know existed. Their lips glide in an easy dance, exciting and new, and still so quiet that it settles all worries in Castiel's mind. He wants for it to never end.

Chapter Text

"Who was that man, Papa?" Claire asks from the back of their car. Castiel barely hears her over his wolf's whining in his head.

Stupid animal!

"That was Dean. He's… someone really special."

"His eyes looked scary," Jack says.

"Alpha red can look scary, and it's better to keep away if you see it. They mean an alpha's wolf is taking over control, and that can mean rage. It doesn't happen often, but better be safe than sorry," Castiel replies.

He didn't think Dean was dangerous for a second. Maybe because his own wolf recognised him as his true mate.

"Why were your eyes so golden?" Jack asks.

"Because my omega was taking over control, too, Jackie."

"Can that be dangerous, too?" Claire asks.

"Only when an omega feels that their pups or people they love are in danger. Omega rage is different, but still dangerous," Castiel explains. He's only seen it once as a child. It was heartbreaking and scary.

"But if you and Dean weren't in rage, then what happened?" Claire probes further. Castiel decides there's no use in not addressing it. This will make the rounds. Their schoolmates will surely ask them come Monday about their father and his true mate being the gossip in their small town.

"Do you remember the fairy tale of the sleeping princess that I used to read to you?" Castiel asks.

"Where her true mate kissed her awake?" Claire asks.

"Yes, that one. See… True mates are real. Not everyone has one, only a lucky few. Dean… he is my true mate. We scented each other, and that called our wolves to action."

"Does this make you a princess, Papa?" Jack asks.

Castiel chuckles, his wolf finally calming down a bit, now that he's talking about his mate.

"I don't think I'd make a good princess," Castiel says, shivering a little, remembering that there was a time when men like him were forcefully feminised. As if having the ability to give birth would make them women somehow. Unbelievable!

"But you could be Dean's prince," Claire giggles.

"Do you think I'd look good with a crown?" Castiel jokes.

"You always look good," Jack states seriously. Castiel chuckles. His boy is too sweet.

"Will Dean move in with us?" Claire asks.

"Um… I don't know. I think we first have to check if we four get along, don't you think?"

"And if we don't?" Claire asks. Castiel studies her facial expression in the rearview mirror. She has her brooding face on. It has resided there way too often since her alpha father died.

"Then he most definitely won't," he says matter-of-factly.

"But he's your prince, I mean true mate, Papa. That's special," Claire argues.

"Yes. But do you know what's even more special? You and your brother. You are my joy, Claire. Nothing will ever top the love I have for you."

"Not even your true mate?"

"Not even him."

Claire's face morphs into a satisfied smile. Castiel relaxes behind the steering wheel. The events of the last two hours are only slowly sinking in. Dean's number is waiting in his phone. He can't wait to hear his voice again.

"Hey," Dean says when Castiel opens his front door.

"Hello, Dean," he replies and waves over at his mate's brother Sam behind the steering wheel of the Impala.

"Are you still high?" Castiel asks, chuckling, surprised that Dean didn't drive over on his own. It's a sweet thought that he's still drugged by his pheromones despite them being apart for a few hours now. Though Dean surprisingly let go of him when Charlie returned with the well-fed kids, so maybe it isn't that serious.

"Nah," Dean chuckles. "But my wolf was a little bitch after you left. He didn't like that I wanted to give you time to think."

His honesty touches Castiel in strange ways. Dean could play the big, strong, unmoved alpha, but he doesn't. Castiel senses that Dean is a gentle soul under some of his undeniable alpha attitudes.

"Come in," Castiel says and steps to the side for Dean to enter. "My pups are in bed," he explains.

"You told me on the phone."

Right.

Dean looks around. "You have a nice home."

"Thank you. My mate built it."

Dean growls on instinct but apologises immediately.

"It's okay," Castiel reassures him. "My omega is right under the surface too."

"Really?" Dean smirks. "You don't seem like it."

"I'm probably not what you're looking for in an omega then," Castiel says and busies himself with pouring them a glass of iced tea from the fridge.

Dean huffs a laugh. "You're my true mate. You're everything I look for, by nature."

Castiel swallows hard. "Do you want a piece of cherry pie?" he asks to deflect from the surge of strange hope in his scent.

"See? You've already made my favourite treat," Dean grins.

"It's store-bought," Castiel says, frowning.

"Perfect anyway. And hey. We'll figure this out. I won't claim you right here in your kitchen," Dean jokes. Still, Castiel's cheeks flame up a second later. If Dean smells his slick collecting at the mere thought, he doesn't mention it.

"But you're thinking about it? Mating with me?" Castiel asks cautiously after collecting himself.

"Aren't you?" Dean asks, confusion and sadness edging into his scent.

"I have pups to consider," he reminds Dean.

"I raised my brother. He's studying law at Stanford. He's just here for spring break."

Castiel is flabbergasted. Just as much as when he realised that the tall man was an omega like him.

"Stanford? Wow. Not many with our gender make it there."

"Well, he's a smartass," Dean grins and digs into the offered pie. "Did you get it at Ms Moseley's bakery?" he asks with his mouth full.

Castiel hums in affirmation.

"She's got the best pies in town," Dean says, humming happily around the bite.

"I agree," Castiel says. He furrows his brow. "Do you think it's right for omegas to strive for higher education, Dean?"

"Sure," he replies with his mouth filled with pie. "I put Sam through college working two jobs. Now he's got a full ride," Dean says proudly.

"You're a good alpha. I assume you stepped in after your mother died?"

"Yeah. My father was a crappy alpha, left us alone all the time. I presented when I was eight."

Eight. Castiel's heart is breaking for his mate. Dean must have gone through so much heartache and suffering as a kid if his wolf awakened so early.

"I'm so sorry, Dean," he says.

"Don't. It's okay," he waves off his sympathy.

"You should have had a childhood."

Dean shrugs his shoulders. "It's alright. I guess it was training for what fate planned out for me," he says, nodding at the drawings hanging on the fridge.

"Dean, there's no obligation for you to see this through. There is medication for pining sickness that works on true mates, too."

Dean's face turns sober. "I'm gonna level with you, Cass. I don't have a good track record when it comes to relationships. I won't give up on my one shot at lasting love, unless you ask me to."

Castiel leans against the kitchen cabinet, looking at the alpha sitting at the breakfast bar as if he always belonged there.

"I don't want to give up on it either," he whispers. Dean's following smile puts the sun to shame.

"Good," he chuckles, a beautiful pink dusting his cheeks. Castiel has never seen an alpha blush before. It makes his heart leap and his omega purr in contentment. Dean's alpha replies in a low, gentle rumble.

Castiel chuckles.

"What?" Dean smirks. Castiel shakes his head, but he can't help but smile. "Come on, man. Tell me," Dean chuckles. Castiel shrugs.

"I've always been the not-purring omega. I've only done it twice. When my pups were born."

Dean's eyes grow sad for a moment. Then he puts the pie fork down and walks over to his mate. He cups Castiel's face and nudges his nose against his until the omega purrs in delight. He places a gentle kiss on Castiel's lip, his own chest rumbling with contentment.

Castiel allows Dean to lead. It's not as if he has a lot of experience when it comes to such things. But Dean obviously has. Of course, he has. He's so handsome and nice and his scent is very pleasant, warm and soothing in ways Castiel can't even put words to.

Castiel doesn't stop purring as they keep on kissing, only slightly disturbed by the smiles tugging on both their lips. They stay like this for a long while, kissing and purring and rumbling, their scents mingling perfectly in the bubble they're creating together. Castiel had always wondered why he smelt like his favourite treat. He knows now. His marshmallows melting over Dean's campfire smell better than anything else in the whole wide world.

"I need to check on the pups," Castiel says after a long, long while, forcing himself to breathe through his mouth.

"Sure," Dean slurs a little. Castiel stares at his mate's lips for a long moment. They are slightly swollen and a delicious shade of pink. He did that. His omega is mightily proud of him.

He tears himself away from his alpha and climbs up the stairs. His pups sleep cuddled together. Castiel watches them for a while. Now, with Dean's scent out of his nose, it's easier to think. Easier to worry, too.

Destiny is a strange thing. It should make all of this easier, knowing they were made for each other. But there's also the doubt in Castiel's heart. Dean is so young. They have eight years between them. No wonder they didn't find each other when Castiel was in his prime. What alpha who has just come of age wants to have pups and mate a – in comparison – old man? Castiel wouldn't have wanted to put this on him either. True mate or not.

Dean is a man now, though. Twenty-six. A complete sweetheart and good with kids, if his best friend Charlie is to be believed. But of course, she would say that.

Yes, twenty-six is a good age to mate, rather late, actually. It's a miracle Dean isn't off the market yet. But he said he had no luck in love. But is it because he chose the wrong omegas or because he's shit at relationships?

Only one way to find out, Castiel supposes, but somehow, the prospect of messing up the relationship with his true mate is more daunting than his past, loveless mating ever was.

Chapter Text

"How's your wolf?" Dean asks. Castiel presses his phone closer to his ear as he tries not to ram his trolley into the strangely enticing fruit display.

"He's good, thanks to your shirt."

Castiel blinks away the memory of his bare-chested alpha in the middle of his living room, offering him his shirt to keep his wolf from pining. He won't smell of arousal in the middle of the supermarket.

"Yeah. Yours too. I will never understand why you enjoy running, but if it leads to deliciously smelling shirts, I'll support you all the way."

Castiel chuckles.

"Maybe if you took a jog, your shirt would survive Jack. He stole it in the middle of the night and it only smelt of him come morning."

"Your pup likes my scent?" Dean asks. Castiel can imagine the accompanying smug grin on his face.

"Yes," he replies.

"You know what the Germans say when they like someone?" Dean asks. It sounds as if he's ready to drop another trivia. Castiel can't make sense of the knowledge his alpha gathered travelling around, meeting people from all over the world. Dean might not be a studied man like Castiel, but he is intelligent, the perfect mix of book and street-smart. Dean is truly the full package. If he were a single man, Castiel would have invited him into his nest after their first Skype rendezvous. But he isn't. And as much as he wants to throw all caution to the wind, he's trying his best to be the responsible one in this relationship. Dean is completely smitten with him.

"No. What do the Germans say, Dean?" Castiel asks and puts a pineapple into his trolley.

"They say they can smell somebody well, that liking your scent means they like you. So, if Jack does..."

Castiel snorts a laugh.

"I suppose you're right. Your scent was all over him. My wolf did a happy dance. Biology is so stupid."

"You think that?"

Castiel stalls. Shit.

"Yes…. No... Yes." He sighs. "It's not easy to be seen as the weaker sex, simply because you have a uterus."

Dean hums in understanding.

"I get that. But things are changing. Do I look like an old-school alpha to you?"

"You said you'd like a traditional omega chase."

Dean groans. "With you, not a wild hunt with asshole alphas claiming whoever they want. I think it's romantic."

"Romantic?" Castiel snorts.

"Or hot."

Castiel wets his lips and pushes his trolley to the bread aisle.

"Sounds as if you have experience."

He prays that Dean doesn't, because that would mean he had intentions with another omega, more than just casual sex. Chase instincts usually don't just pop up with a random hook-up. Though, what does Castiel know? His late mate surely never chased him.

Dean's answer takes too long to be a no.

"It's okay, Dean. I had a mating and pups."

Still, it hurts. He's never been anyone's first choice. And while their natural bond makes many things easier, it also means Dean didn't pick him.

"I'm sure it would be different with you," Dean says.

"Neither romantic nor hot?"

Dean chuckles on the other side of the line.

"Maybe both. Maybe I should start training, huh?"

"Only if you'd feel emasculated if your omega outruns you," Castiel teases, deciding to push away the sadness. He's simply overwhelmed, that's all. The last few days have been a lot.

"I like that you are a strong omega, Cass. You're perfect."

"And you're a sweet talker, Dean."

"Is it working?"

Castiel exhales slowly, the smile on his face so wide it's nearly painful.

"Yeah," he all but giggles. Castiel Novak never giggles.

"Good," Dean says, a smile audible in his voice. "You still game for tomorrow? I checked. The tickets can be bought online, so we can jump the queue."

"We're all looking forward to it."

"Awesome! I'll pick up my car from the garage tonight. I let them install three-point seat belts in the back."

"You did what?" Castiel asks and drops two packages of instant porridge into the trolley.

"It's safer than with the two-pointers. And your pups surely still need infant seats, right? My friend Jody said they mostly only work with those."

Castiel melts a little inside. His alpha is so caring. And his car is holy to him. Changing it for pups who aren't his is a big deal. And he's talking with others about him and the pups. He has them on his mind, not only his omega.

"Thank you," Castiel says. It's not much, but what else does he have to offer? Dean is way too generous for an alpha who was told that his true mate needed time to think and to prepare his kids for their first real meeting. Dean is too generous, full stop. Castiel always had to nag his old mate to do things he struggled with, technically or timewise. Dean has already ordered them food – Castiel and the kids, him not included – just because Castiel sounded tired over the phone. He also came around to fix the fence where the neighbours' dogs always escape and because of which Castiel couldn't let the pups play unsupervised in the garden. Dean is a doer. It frightens Castiel a little. He learnt to be self-sufficient after his mate died. What if Dean likes a strong omega but not an independent one?

"It's nothing," Dean says. "I gotta go now. I'll get the tickets and pick you up at 9.30. Can't wait to see you. I'll leave you a new shirt on the porch, right after work. For the night."

"You know how to make an omega swoon," Castiel laughs.

"Did I?" Yes, that's most definitely a big fat grin in the alpha's voice.

"No. I never swoon," Castiel states matter-of-factly.

"You never purr either," Dean teases.

Right.

"We'll see," Castiel smirks. "Can't wait to smell you tonight."

"Does that mean you like me?"

"Yes, I like my true mate. A shocker, I know," Castiel deadpans.

"Yes, but do you like like me?"

"I don't understand that reference."

"What? You never went to high school and tried to get a handsome alpha?"

"I went to school to learn things, Dean."

His alpha huffs a laugh. "Can't say the same. I never was long enough in one place to grasp the subject matter. Chicks were easier to study."

Castiel can't help the low growl building up in his chest. His alpha may be wonderful, but he's also a clumsy oaf sometimes.

"You said you had to leave. I'm gonna hang up now," Castiel says. "See you tomorrow."

"Can't wait for it."

Castiel hangs up and breathes a sigh.

"Straying alpha?" a sympathetic-looking, old omega woman asks. Castiel reins in his jealous scent immediately.

"No. I'm envious of a past I wasn't a part of. Stupid wolf," he chuckles, heat rising into his cheeks. It is ridiculous. His old mate stepped out of their marriage, and Castiel didn't even mention it, and now he's angry that his beautiful mate enjoyed his youth long before meeting him?

"Jealousy is a useless emotion. Talk to them. One shouldn't go into heat with an alpha whom one doesn't trust 1000 per cent."

Castiel startles, panic shooting hotly through his body.

"H–heat?" he stutters.

"It's coming soon, isn't it?" the woman asks, tapping her pointer to her nose. Castiel scents himself. It's very subtle. So subtle that he missed it.

Dammit!

He looks into his trolley. The pineapple should have tipped him off. He's not a huge fan of fruit. Or oatmeal, but his body knows he needs to stock up on vitamins and minerals for what is coming.

Castiel deflates a little. His heats somehow always come as a surprise. He should know the signs after nearly two decades of having them, but well.

"Yeah," he sighs. "I have two, maybe three days left."

He feels like crying. It's too soon.

"Talk to your alpha. Ghosts of the past are no reason for doubts in the present," the other omega says.

Castiel nods, his eyes following her until she gets out of sight. He'll have to talk with Dean. Will he smell the pre-heat on him tomorrow? Will he behave? The kids are so excited for the zoo.

He will tell Dean after, Castiel decides. He wishes he had more time.

"Hey," Dean says, leaning relaxed against the Impala.

"Hello, Dean," Castiel replies from the porch and gives him a close-lipped smile.

"Are the pups ready?"

"Bathroom round," Castiel chuckles and walks down the steps.

They meet in a chaste kiss. Castiel has never shared affection in public. Well, save the day they met, but that was the pheromones' work. After two weeks with Dean's scent in his nose, it's easier to not get washed away by it. Still, Castiel needs to scent him properly, his nose brushing over Dean's neck, eliciting a content rumble from the alpha. God, he could crawl into Dean, could bathe in his scent. Castiel knows it's only the pre-heat. He's never been much into scent-marking, but he wouldn't keep Dean from leaving his all over his body if he offered.

Dean chuckles and scents him back. Was that too much? Did he embarrass him? Castiel wants to ask but the front door swings open. Castiel steps away, warmth shooting into his cheeks.

"Children, this is Dean," he says a little flustered. He hadn't expected his kids to get dressed on their own. They never do. Except for today, of course. "Dean, these are Claire and Jack. My pups."

"Hey there," Dean greets and squats down when the kids are close. "Great to meet you properly," he says, shaking Jack's offered hand. "Ready to have fun?"

"I wanna see the penguins," Jack exclaims, jumping up and down.

"Penguins are so cool," Dean agrees. "And you, Claire?"

Claire glances at her father and pushes her chin forward.

"Lions," she presses out.

"Majestic," Dean states, raising his eyebrows.

"We need to get the children's seats," Castiel cuts through the awkward silence.

"Right," Dean says, sounding relieved. "Did you bring CDs for the drive?"

Claire taps silently against her backpack.

"Agree on the first one while Dean and I get the seats, alright?"

"Aladdin!" Jack shouts.

"Not again," Claire groans.

Castiel tugs on Dean's sleeve, and they walk to his garage.

"She doesn't like me, huh?" Dean asks when they're out of earshot.

"She was very close to her alpha father. Please, don't take it personally."

"I won't. Don't worry. She'll love me eventually," Dean smirks.

"What if she won't?" Castiel speaks out what both of them fear.

Dean works his jaw and cups Castiel's cheek gently.

"Let's cross that bridge when we get there, huh?"

"Yeah," Castiel agrees. He still hopes his daughter won't claim the promise he made her.

Chapter Text

It's a struggle but somehow, Castiel makes it through the day without embarrassing himself. But that's kinda easy at Dean's side. Brains and brawn—his alpha is the full package.

Jack loves Dean, not the least because the alpha answers all of his millions of questions, like how the "magical" adapter cassette brings the music from his CD player into Dean's loudspeakers or why flamingos are pink.

Claire, on the other hand, gives them both a headache. She counters every single one of Dean's jokes with an annoyed eye roll. Castiel knows that she can be stubborn as hell – she's his daughter after all – but this is a full blockade. He thought she'd be a bit more open to the whole true mates thing, especially with his reassurances about Dean not being old school. But Claire is a grumpy cat all day, very much like the lions, the only animals that elicit something akin to a smile on her face. And the dolphins, but one gets her wet, and that is it for her.

It's still a nice day, all in all, and when they're driving home and Claire's playlist comes over the speakers, his pup's face settles to something close enough to content for Castiel to relax a little. He still keeps his scent under tight control. Dean hasn't said anything, just scented him a few more times. It's probably just the natural progression of their relationship, instinct forging his behaviour. With them not bonded, scenting is the only way to show his claim on Castiel. He'll have to shower before bedtime or Claire might ban him from the nest like the day they met.

Much to Castiel's chagrin, their good night kiss is cancelled. Dean doesn't even come in for dinner. His scent and smile are optimistic, but Castiel guesses he's just really good at masking his emotions.

"Can we meet Monday morning when the kids are in school?" Dean asks.

Castiel worries his lip.

"Um… I… I have to take care of a medical thing," he says. Dean's alarmed countenance makes Castiel's wolf happy, urging him to pull his alpha into his nest. Not that Castiel would listen. After Claire's clear blockade, he doubts he ever will.

"Something serious?" Dean asks, so painfully caring.

"No. Just… an omega thing," Castiel says nonchalantly. It's a nuisance, really, but one he's used to handle. His late mate always left him alone when he referred to something regarding his second gender, especially an upcoming heat. But not his intended. Of course not.

"You can tell me things, you know?" Dean says. "I've raised an omega. If I can do something for you… I can get you things or drive you if you're going to a doctor or whatever you need."

Castiel quirks a smile. "That's a kind offer but… I'll be really busy. Maybe we can meet at the weekend?"

Dean works his jaw and nods. "Sure. Whenever you want." Instead of leaning in for a kiss, Dean just raises his hand before he turns to walk down the steps. Castiel looks after him, tears welling up in his eyes. His wolf is running amok in his reptilian brain, making him dizzy. It's hard to let Dean go, but it's the right thing to do. Spending his heat together is a bad idea. On too many levels to count. But tell that to his stupid animal.

Castiel closes the door, finding Claire sitting on the shoe bench, looking morose. Castiel suppresses a sigh and sits down next to her.

"What's wrong?" he asks.

"You love him, don't you?" she all but whispers.

Does he? He yearns for Dean, feels safe with him, calm. But love? Maybe he's too broken to allow himself to fall, even for his true mate.

"Why are you asking?"

"Because you smell so happy around him. Well, most of the time. You didn't smell like that back with Dad."

Oh.

"Your dad and I, we… we were good companions. But Dean and I are true mates. I was happy with your dad, just… it's a different kind of connection, you know? — Is that why you gave Dean the cold shoulder today?"

Claire shrugs, her lips curling down.

"I always wanted to go to the zoo with Daddy. But we never did."

Castiel's heart breaks for his daughter. He nods in understanding and pulls her into his side.

"Your dad thought he had so much more time with us. He wanted to do so many things with you. I'm so sorry that he didn't have the chance."

Claire chews her bottom lip. "Would you have left Dad if he was still here?" she asks in a meek voice.

Castiel's stomach drops. He closes his eyes against the onslaught of feelings the question unleashes.

"No," he states matter-of-factly.

"Why not?"

Castiel quirks a smile. "Because I've always wanted you and Jack to have a happy family. You and your brother are the most important people to me."

"More important than Dean?"

"Yes," Castiel says, ignoring his whining wolf.

"That sounds wrong," Claire says.

Castiel huffs a surprised laugh. "Well. I've always been a bit odd. But your happiness is more important than mine, honey."

Claire pushes her sneakers off her feet. Castiel doesn't reprimand her that she should have opened the Velcro fasteners first. She's obviously in deep thought.

"You deserve to be happy too," she says after a long stretch of silence. "And Dean is okay. He said I could play with his Lego."

"He has Lego?"

Claire makes a face. "A bunch, he said. Haven't you been to his place?"

Castiel shakes his head. He's been way too worried that he would fall for good at a place that smells like his alpha, like home and the promise of a happy future. The drive to and from the zoo was hard enough with Dean so close.

"Maybe you should. He looked sad."

"I know. It's hard on him. True mates usually don't wait."

Claire nods.

"Are you going to spend your heat with him?"

Castiel chokes on his own saliva, spluttering for a moment.

"Heat?" he croaks.

"You asked Auntie Kelly to drive us to school on Monday. You only do that during your heat."

"Right," Castiel chuckles.

"And omegas need their alphas during heat. We learnt that at school."

"That's right, honey. But heat is a very sensitive time, and one shouldn't spend it with an alpha they're not bonded to."

Castiel scolds himself inwardly as soon as the words are out of his mouth. Didn't he promise himself to raise his children differently?

"It should be someone who one feels safe with," he adds. "I've spent more heats on my own than with a partner."

"But you have Dean now," Claire insists.

"I don't want to lead him on in case…"

"In case what?" Claire asks, brow furrowed. Castiel isn't sure if this is a conversation one should have at her age. But alas, here they are.

"In case I won't mate with him. I told you: You and Jack are my number one priority."

Claire's frown only grows deeper.

"Let's have dinner, honey. Tomorrow is church," Castiel says. All of that really shouldn't be on his daughter's mind.

Claire hugs Castiel tightly and runs to the bathroom. Castiel puts away their shoes with a sigh, then shrugs out of his trench coat and puts it together with Dean's scented shirt into a vacuum bag. He'll desperately need them when his heat hits. He can feel the beginning already bubbling under the surface.

Five days later

Castiel fills his washing machine and stretches his back. He's sore all over, every muscle aching. This has been the worst heat of his life, worse even than his first and all those he spent alone when his mate was away on "on-site visits". With that pretty omega colleague, Castiel supposes. But he never complained. He was a strong omega, after all. He could go through a heat and take care of their pups.

But not this time. It was so bad that he had to ask Kelly to take the kids for three whole days. Castiel didn't want them to see him like this, sweaty and out of it. The painkillers didn't cut it. Dean's collected shirts neither. The medication Castiel finally took on day two knocked him out completely. He didn't even drink or eat with a caring alpha missing at his side. His throat is parched and his stomach is rumbling but the worst is over. At least he hopes so.

He plugs in his phone that ran out of battery sometime during his heat. When it boots again, he texts Kelly to let her know that he'll pick up the kids in the afternoon, then he checks his messages.

[Dean] If you don't wanna see me again, that's fine. Just don't ghost me without a goodbye.

Castiel feels sick to his bones. He hasn't thought or dreamt of anyone else but Dean over the last few days. He even texted with him in the beginning until his heat made him type things he's more than grateful to find unposted in the reply box.

He deletes them.

[Castiel] I'm sorry. I would never! I took medication that knocked me out.

Dean's reply doesn't take long.

[Dean] Are you sick?

Castiel can't help but smile.

[Castiel] I'm much better now.

[Dean] Why didn't you say something? And here I was thinking you were dumping me.

[Castiel] Not if I can help it.

Okay. That's the residual heat talking. Rational Castiel would have worded that with less hope.

[Dean] She'll come around. You'll see.

Leave it to Dean to read between the lines.

[Castiel] Always the optimist.

[Dean] Only when it comes to you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.

Castiel slumps onto the sofa. Dean's the best thing, too, but Castiel isn't sure if he can have him. And he can hardly ask Dean to wait until the kids go away for college. His alpha is young, charming, and sexy. He could have anyone, no matter how often he insists that he's undatable for anyone but him.

[Castiel] Claire's on a sleepover on Saturday. Wanna come over?

[Dean] Overnight?

[Castiel] Jack still sleeps in our nest.

[Dean] I haven't had a nest since Sam left. I bet yours is perfect.

Castiel swallows hard. Right now it's just an incoherent mess of blankets and stripped pillows, barren and missing his pups' scents.

[Dean] Can I do something for you? Drop off soup or…?

Castiel knocks his forehead against the sofa cushion, hoping against all odds that his wolf will shut up and calm down.

[Castiel] Kelly filled my fridge. Don't worry.

[Dean] That bad, huh? Should have said something. But I guess you really don't need an alpha.

Just great. Dean is miffed now. Castiel's wolf is whining. What has his life become? An indifferent alpha, he knows how to handle. A man who is caring and loving? Not so much.

[Castiel] I'm sorry, Dean. I have been responsible for my heats for a long while.

[Dean] You are in heat?!?!?!

Shit! What is wrong with him? Why did he type and send that? But what is done is done.

[Castiel] It's nearly over.

[Dean] And I was sitting here feeling sorry for myself while you suffered through it alone. Fuck, Cass!

[Castiel] I slept through most of it. I didn't think it fair to tell you.

It takes a while until Dean's reply comes through.

[Dean] Because I'm not your alpha.

Castiel breathes a sigh.

[Castiel] Yes.

[Dean] I still could have helped. Scented things and stuff.

[Castiel] I had your shirts. They helped me until the meds kicked in. I dreamed about you.

[Dean] You did? Naughty things?

[Castiel] Dean!

[Dean] Sorry.

[Castiel] Everything naughty was completely involuntary.

[Dean] I bet you have a dirty mind, Mr. Novak.

Castiel's wolf purrs happily at the clearly appeased alpha. Castiel rolls his eyes at him. He has half a mind to take anti-pining medication to shut him up, but that stuff can have nasty side effects.

[Castiel] I won't talk about it, Dean.

[Dean] Okay, okay. At least let me bring you a lasagna. I stress-cooked a little over the past few days, and you should eat something proper.

Castiel lets out an unwitting purr.

[Castiel] The kids need me tonight, Dean. Normalcy. They aren't used to staying away from home.

[Dean] That's okay. We don't need to see each other. I can leave it on the porch. I only wanna be there for you. No pressure.

Castiel exhales loudly.

[Castiel] Okay. Thank you. You're a good alpha.

[Dean] No problem.

Castiel wishes that were true.

Chapter Text

"Your lasagna was the best!" Jack says with his mouth full.

"Jack," Castiel reprimands him gently.

"I bet your papa makes a mean one too," Dean smirks.

"Pasta and I are arch-enemies," Castiel chuckles.

"But this roast is so good," Dean praises. Castiel blushes a little. What is this man doing to him? Or maybe Castiel is just so starved for praise that he soaks it up pathetically.

"It was Daddy's favourite," Jack shares. He just learnt that info this afternoon. It's a sure way to make him try new things, Castiel learnt. But it's a double-edged sword. One never knows if the mentioning of his late father will make the boy sad or curious. Today, it fortunately was the latter.

Dean smiles at Jack. "Your daddy had good taste then."

Jack nods, his eyebrow knitted together. "We weren't at his grave today," he murmurs.

"I told you, Jackie. We will go tomorrow when your sister is back," Castiel says. He simply had too much on his plate today with Claire's field hockey game, rescheduled grocery shopping due to his heat and cooking for his alpha Dean. But Castiel doesn't kid himself. The rat race won't stop anytime soon. Squeezing Dean into his busy schedule will take effort. If this is supposed to work, they'll have to take baby steps. Castiel's wolf doesn't like this idea one bit.

"We always go on Saturday," Jack pouts.

"What do you do when you go visit your dad?" Dean asks. Castiel could kiss him for it, for the ease and lack of jealousy, for his genuine interest.

"We always bring new flowers to make it pretty," Jack says, smiling, "and when the grave lantern is low, Claire puts in a new candle. My job is to clean the tombstone with a broom."

"Jack is very meticulous, you must know," Castiel says, pride lacing his voice.

"Not like Claire," Jack smirks. "Her room is always a mess."

"Not always," Castiel corrects. He knows her room needs a proper cleaning, but he simply doesn't have the energy for it. Dean's place surely is tidy and clean. Castiel's only is on the ground floor. Another reason for Dean not to stay the night.

"When I was her age, I lived in the backseat of my car. And sometimes in motels. Not much clean-up necessary," Dean says.

"That's so cool! Papa only drives us to school."

"And play dates, games, church, therapy…" Castiel interjects.

"We never go on vacation. Uncle Gabe went to Disneyland. That's in France. He took a plane."

"Well, that's not really in our budget, honey," Castiel says. His brother had asked him to join him, his mate and her son but Castiel was too proud to ask him to pay for them. He knows Gabriel could easily afford it but Castiel has always been a modest person, and luxuries are for those who earned them.

"Dad promised we'd go to Disney World," Jack whines.

Castiel clenches his jaw and frowns at his plate. How come Jack remembers stuff like that but never the rules his alpha father put into place? And how is he supposed to explain to his little boy that the money he has is enough for everyday life but no extras? He doesn't want him to worry about such things.

"Maybe one day, honey," Castiel croaks, his heart heavy, shame painting his cheeks pink. He doesn't dare look at Dean, whose father surely never mentioned something as decadent as this.

"We could make a road trip to Orlando," Dean offers while doing the dishes, Jack out of earshot.

"I can't, Dean. It's too expensive."

"We could use my mating fund."

"You have a mating fund?" Castiel chuckles. For all he heard about John Winchester, the man didn't seem to him like someone who cared about tradition that much.

"My mother's side of the family is rather conservative. They put money in the bank the moment Sam and I were born."

"But for you to access it you had to mate," Castiel states matter-of-factly.

"I ain't giving up hope that I will," Dean says, giving Castiel a wink that spreads warmth in the omega's chest. God, dammit! He's way too easy for the alpha. If it weren't for the kids…

"My dowry is in this house, Dean. I can't match whatever your family put together."

"You don't need to. There's no one to claim it but me. I just… Do you even want to?"

"What?"

"Mate?"

Castiel shrugs. "I do but…"

Dean looks at him with suspiciously glittering eyes, then turns his gaze back to the dishwater, his jaw working. Castiel feels sick in an instant.

"I'm not good enough for you," Dean says, voice quivering, his usual bravado a million miles away.

"No! You're perfect," Castiel says matter-of-factly.

Dean snorts a mirthless laugh. "You don't have to put it on that thick just to appease me," he murmurs. Castiel sighs.

"I think you're the only alpha in my life I never felt the need to appease," he says and cups Dean's shoulder. "I've never been happier than being around you."

Dean glances at him cautiously. "Then why the hesitation? I know you wanna take it slow but, man, I've had relationships in grade school that developed faster. What are you so scared of? I… I'm really trying to understand. Am I so disgusting or broken or used up that you can't…?"

"I'm a father, Dean," Castiel interrupts him. "This… I wish it was just about you and me. But it isn't. I can't expect you to be patient enough to wait however long it might take me… us. I don't want to lead you on."

"You're not leading me on, but you're giving me whiplash."

"I'm sorry, Dean."

"Save it, Cass. I'm running out of…" Dean bites himself off mid sentence. Castiel's heart plummets to the floor.

"Patience," he croaks, his wolf's whine lacing the word. "I get it," he presses out trying to get a hold on his slipping composure.

"No, you stupid son of a bitch," Dean hisses. "Hope. If not even my true mate wants me…"

Oh, God, this is going sideways completely.

"I do want you, Dean," Castiel hastens to say. "I'm just not good at… relationships."

"That's bullshit, and you know that!"

"Dean," he shushes him to no avail.

"If you want me, then why are you holding back? How is that supposed to lead us to anything? How is Claire supposed to understand that we're good for each other if you prevent her from running into me? I… I get it. You weren't expecting me. Neither did I expect you. But here we are, and I wanna be your alpha, and your kids' alpha. I will never replace your mate, and I don't wanna replace their father. I just want to be there for you three. Why is that so hard to accept for you? Why are you constantly pushing on the brake?"

Castiel curls his fingers around the edge of the kitchen's worktop and sighs.

"Because you deserve better."

Dean growls lowly at that but reins in his wolf immediately. "That's for me to decide, Cass. What's the best for me is none of your fucking business. You can either accept it or not. Thing is… I accepted my fate a long time ago. I expected to never find lasting love, only short-lived fun. But fate led me to you, so stop racking your brain about what I deserve. It's you. The question is: Do you want me? Not because your wolf drags you to me but 'cause you like me, because you want us to work, because you want me to take care of you."

Castiel swallows hard. He doesn't know why he is so stubbornly standing in his own way. There's no question about what he wants. And not only because true mates, once mated, have a zero separation rate. No.

"I've never wanted anyone the way I want you, Dean," Castiel all but whispers. "And I want us to be together. As a family."

Dean's lips twitch into a nervous smile. "Good," he croaks. "We're on the same page then."

Castiel chuckles wetly. "I'm a mess. I'm sorry."

Dean shakes his head. "Don't be. It's a lot. Just… Don't make decisions for me. I'm all in. And if I can make your life easier in any way… We're a team, okay?"

Castiel works his jaw. "I'm not used to… My mate was…" He sighs.

"He loved your pups but he took you for granted," Dean states, as if he knew him.

"Kinda," Castiel allows.

"I won't be the perfect alpha, either. But one thing I can promise you: I will be there for you and your pups, Cass. As long as you'll have me."

"Even if they should hate your guts at times?"

"They can't be more bitchy than Sam during puberty," Dean smirks. Castiel raises an amused eyebrow. He sometimes forgets that Dean was a parent long before he was an adult.

"Right," Castiel says. "So… we'll make it up as we go then?" he asks, gentle hope making his heart flutter.

Dean grins at him, eyes shining brightly. "Sounds like a plan."

Castiel chuckles quietly, fingers trailing over the worktop. "I should go look for Jack. It's suspiciously quiet up there."

Dean laughs. "Yeah. I'll finish here."

Castiel nods and heads for the stairs but then turns around and presses a kiss on Dean's lips. It's the first in more than a week, and it tastes sweeter than any they've ever shared.

Something unravels in Castiel's chest that had been tightly bound. Dean smiles against his lips, nostrils fluttering as he breathes in Castiel's happy scent. Claire was right. Dean elicits it whenever Castiel stops worrying for a moment. Who knows? Maybe everyone will smell it more often in the future.

"Why did I have to learn this from my gossiping neighbour, Castiel?" his mother asks, her fingers nearly crushing the handle of the fine china teacup that was part of his trousseau.

"Because we're still figuring things out, Mother," Castiel replies. It was only a question of time until she was bound to get wind of it. It's a miracle the news took that long to travel across town, really.

"And when did you plan to introduce this alpha to me?"

Castiel wets his lips. "When we decide to bond."

"I'm surprised you haven't yet," she grinds, her eyes flickering to his unblemished neck. Castiel knew that she'd hate this. Him finding an alpha without her meddling? It's a sacrilege of sorts. She's a matriarch, but one ruling from behind the curtains. No matter how meek she acts in public, she reigned the Shurley pack since the day she mated his father. No wonder his siblings are scattered all over the country.

"Well, we have Claire and Jack to consider," he musters calmly. He wasn't expecting this topic when his mother invited herself over for tea. Or maybe he was. He just wasn't ready for it.

"What does he have to offer you?" she asks.

Love, affection, trust, joy, peace. But these aren't things his mother is looking for in a mate. Her second mate was as well-chosen as her first.

"He is a hard-working, caring man, who is willing to take on the responsibilities of the head of the household," Castiel says. It feels icky to say the latter. Dean never voiced any intention of wanting to be Castiel's superior. Quite the opposite. Dean doesn't seem to plan on changing the family dynamics that have evolved since Castiel's mate died. He simply wants to insert himself in them and take over some of Castiel's responsibilities to lighten the load that's wearing his mate thin. He even started to do the morning school run so that Castiel has time to go for a jog.

Dean turned out to be right about Castiel acting as a brake in the dynamic between Dean and his kids. The first few times Dean showed up in the morning, Claire was her usual grumpy self. But now, she's started bantering with Dean the way she used to with her alpha father. It's a sight to behold and doesn't cease to make Castiel's heart grow with hope.

"What's his line of work?" his mother asks curtly.

Here they go.

"He's a barkeeper," Castiel says.

The crease between his mother's eyebrows grows deeper.

"A barkeeper," she repeats.

"Yes. He works at The Roadhouse, a well-established public house and restaurant but he's saving to open his own bar one day."

That's an outright lie. Castiel has never lied to his mother before, but he knows that he has to sell his mate to her. And it is a dream of Dean's, just not a very feasible one.

"And you're sure he's your true mate?"

"Of course, I am, Mother. Why else would I go out with him?"

Castiel's mother sets her jaw. "You could do better than a barkeeper."

"I did 'better' in the past, but did he make me happy?" Castiel grinds out, slowly losing his patience.

"Of course, he made you happy," his mother protests.

Castiel huffs a mirthless laugh. "He cheated on me, Mother. And it didn't even hurt me because I didn't feel I had a right to more than what he was willing to give me."

"You're not supposed to talk ill of the dead," his mother chides him.

"I'm not. It's the truth. I was in a loveless marriage, Mother. Now, I have a chance to be with someone who wants me to be happy."

"Happiness doesn't pay bills, Castiel."

"No. But it makes life a whole lot better. I don't want to be miserable for the rest of my time."

Huh. When did that shift happen? It's Dean's influence, he supposes.

"Is he at least educated?"

"What does it matter?"

"Plenty. Can he help your pups with homework?"

"I sure can."

"Can he support a family?"

"We can do that together," Castiel says. He won't get his widower's pension anymore if they mate, but if Dean were to move in they surely… God, there's a whole lot they need to talk about.

"An alpha should provide."

"Mother, this isn't the 1900s. Our relationship will be equal."

"Equal," she scoffs. "Omega's need guidance, not equality."

"I've managed pretty well without guidance, Mother. How can you even think so lowly of your own kind?"

"I know I should have never let you go to college. But your father insisted that you forge your own way. And for what? To mate some fellow who just happened along?"

"Dean's my true mate."

Castiel's mother scoffs. "That doesn't buy you a proper collar."

"Maybe I don't want to wear one anymore," Castiel says curtly, glancing at the jewel-adorned leather band around her neck. She gapes at him as if he affronted her personally. He probably did. Such an idea is unheard of in their circles. No one shows off their mating bite. It's deemed vulgar.

"You're truly a wackadoodle. You'll bring shame over all of us."

"My love for Dean is nothing to be ashamed about."

"Love," she snorts, her voice dripping with disdain. "Love is for fairytales, son."

"Then I'll finally be a true omega. Isn't that what you've always wanted?"

"I wanted you to be a proper omega, modest and demure."

"Well… if I am a proper omega or not, that's for my alpha to decide."

Castiel's mother rams her teacup on the coffee table. "He isn't your mate yet. We can go to a doctor and…"

"Stop right there! This is nothing that concerns you."

"Your future mate will raise my grandchildren. Of course, it does."

"Then maybe you should get to know your future son-in-law instead of offering to break us up," Castiel all but shouts.

"You'll regret this, Castiel," she warns.

Castiel shakes his head. He thinks of Dean playing ball with Jack and marvelling at Claire's own Lego spaceship construction, making both pups grinning with joy. He thinks of the mended hole in his fence and Dean's smell that carried him through his heat. He thinks of the three-point seat belts in the Impala and the way Dean's lips taste when he kisses him until his head is empty and his heart full. He thinks of Dean's smile, his thinking face, his goofiness, and his sincerity.

"No. I won't regret it," he says firmly.

His mother exhales loudly and gets up from the sofa. "Will there at least be a ceremony or will you do it like savages?"

Castiel rolls his eyes at her inwardly. "We'll let you know," he says curtly.

Chapter Text

"Hey," Dean greets as he opens his front door. "You're right on time," he smirks.

"Hello, Dean," Castiel says, smiling at him. He's a bit of a pedant when it comes to punctuality. And other things. Despite Dean being his true mate, he sometimes worries this might put him off. Dean is disciplined with himself but very gracious when it comes to others. Hopefully, this will extend to their relationship too.

Jack rams into Dean's leg, hugging it tightly.

"Hi, Rambo," Dean chuckles, ruffling his hair.

"My name is Jack," the boy says, rolling his eyes.

"My apologies. I forgot," Dean says, very seriously.

"No. You didn't," Claire smirks. "Did you pull out the Death Star?"

"I did," Dean laughs. "It's still in the package. Go right through. It's on the dining table," he says and gestures to a door behind him. He gets out of the way for the kids to pass, leaning against the doorframe when Castiel steps close.

"Hey," Dean says quietly, eyes shining. Castiel can't help but kiss him. He's too beautiful not to.

The kiss lasts for a while, leaving both a tad breathless when they emerge on the other side.

"What's gotten into you?" Dean chuckles.

Castiel blushes a little. He wets his lips and chuckles.

"I told off my mother yesterday. And… I don't wanna hold back anymore, Dean."

The alpha's lips part in surprise, curling into a smile.

"Good," he breathes. He cups the back of Castiel's neck and brushes his thumb over the short hair there, sending goosebumps over his skin.

"Can we talk later?" Castiel asks. "I fear for your 'Death Star'."

Dean chuckles. "Your kids are the best behaved I've ever seen, Cass. And even if… I need to get used to it, don't I?"

"It's really expensive."

"It's Lego. It's made for kids to handle."

Castiel nods and follows Dean to the living room. As expected, the kids are sitting in front of the unopened box, big eyes scanning the pictures on it.

"It's 14+," Claire says.

"And you're a pro," Dean says easily. "So. Rules."

"Rules?" Claire asks, eyes widening. Dean has been rather laissez-faire until now around the kids. Castiel watches the change with amusement. He'll likely always be the bad cop parent, but it's good to see that Dean can be serious too.

"Yes. Rule number one: no force. If something doesn't work, ask an adult."

Claire nods.

"Rule number two: no sticky fingers and crumbs at this table. I put snacks and drinks over there on the coffee table. Eating and drinking over there is permitted. Mouths must be empty and hands clean when you return from fuelling up, okay?"

"Okay," the kids say in unison.

"Good. Then let's start. Jack, I thought you could put all the figures together. Do you think you can manage that?"

Jack nods, looking a bit intimidated.

"I'll help you, honey," Castiel assures him.

"Then, let's start," Dean says and opens the box. Claire's eyes grow comically wide when he pulls out the spiral-bound instruction book.

"That's huuuuge," she presses out.

"And that's why I need your help, sweetheart. I've never built anything this big before."

"But what if I can't help you enough?" Claire asks, chewing her bottom lip.

"Oh, I do not doubt that you can, Claire. You've got it all figured out. We'll get there. Together."

Claire releases her lip and nods.

They start working, a concentrated frown never leaving her face. Castiel watches her and Dean in awe. They are a great team. He should have never doubted that.

Time flies with them building, Dean conjuring up a Lego set for Jack's age when the figures of the first package are done. Castiel's wolf swoons at the display of generosity and forethought by his alpha. And for once, Castiel doesn't rein him in, lets the happiness of his animal spread to his whole body.

This is his alpha. And he'll mate him one day. It's not news, but he can finally believe it.

"Lunch break," Castiel announces. Three pairs of unamused eyes hit him.

"You've been working for three hours straight," Castiel chuckles. "You need liquids and energy."

"But Dean only put out sweets and chips," Claire says cautiously.

"The host decides the food. Grab what you want," Castiel smirks.

"Sorry, I—"

Castiel cuts Dean off with a kiss.

"It's alright, alpha," he says when he pulls back.

"I broke some rule I didn't know of, right?" Dean asks.

"Yeah, but it's a special day, and food rules don't apply to special days. I saw you got chocolate marshmallows."

Dean grins. "You said they are your favourite."

"They are. Thank you," Castiel says and gets up, a giddy swarm of bees storming through his stomach. His late mate never remembered what he liked, always brought him a box of chocolates from a brand he detested. It wasn't his fault. They were Castiel's mother's favourite. His mate probably just remembered it wrong and Castiel never corrected him. It wasn't his place to criticise his alpha's gift.

Would he dare correct Dean? Maybe. He's still got a lot of unlearning to do. But with Dean, he thinks he can manage to stand up for himself in a relationship, just as he stood up for himself in front of his mother.

"What are you thinking about?" Dean asks.

Castiel chuckles, staring at the marshmallow in his hand.

"The future," he says and sinks his teeth into the soft, way-too-sweet goodness. Or maybe, it's just the right amount of sweetness. Maybe, the alleged keenness of omegas for sweet things holds a grain of truth. Or it's simply something he likes. Castiel Novak. Omega-to-be of Dean Winchester.

A few days later

"You're such a sore loser," Claire groans to her brother who's started crying at the end of their games night.

"He's still learning to deal with losing games," Castiel tries to keep his daughter from continuing. Jack presses his wet face against his father's neck.

"You're always on his side!" Claire shouts and gets up, flipping the board game, pieces flying everywhere.

"Claire Amelia Novak, you will clean this up. Now!" Castiel orders sternly. Claire crosses her arms over her chest and pushes her chin forward, a picture of defiance.

"You can't make me," she says and storms off to her room.

"Claire!" Castiel calls after her, getting up, Jack still in his arms.

"Give her a moment to cool down," Dean suggests. Castiel breathes a sigh. She has never exploded in front of Dean so far. What must he think about his parenting skills?

"I'm sorry about your game. I'll put it together in a minute."

"Don't worry about it. Tuck Jack in. I'll take care of this," Dean says.

Castiel is torn but Jack's state of agitation is clearly a result of tiredness. That Dean recognises that fills Castiel with fondness. He'll be a good stepfather to his pups, one day.

He carries Jack up the stairs and gets him ready for bed. But despite his best efforts, the boy doesn't calm down in their nest.

"Is Claire angry at me?" he asks.

"No. I think she's angry at me, Jackie."

"Why?"

Castiel sighs. "I don't know, but I'll talk with her when you're asleep, alright?"

"I can sleep alone," Jack offers.

"Are you sure?"

The boy nods and pulls Dean's shirt from the edge of the nest where Castiel usually sleeps. It must smell like both of them. Castiel holds back tears. If it were only Jack, then Dean would have stayed the night a long time ago. But he can't allow himself to think like that. Claire needs him more than he needs Dean. And a family nest is holy, no "strangers" allowed. Despite the progress they made, Dean isn't their official alpha.

"Okay, Jack. You're such a brave big boy," Castiel praises. "I'll leave the door ajar, okay?"

Castiel crawls out of the bed and does as promised, taking a deep breath in front of his daughter's door when he hears voices coming from downstairs. He tiptoes through the hallway. Yes, he taught his kids that eavesdropping isn't okay, but he can't help it.

"I think I remind him of Daddy," Claire says.

"Well, you resemble your alpha father," Dean replies, his voice sounding cautious to Castiel's ear.

"Papa didn't love him."

"I don't think that's true, Claire."

"Not like he loves you."

Castiel's heart clenches. She's not wrong, but how must it feel for a child, knowing that she wasn't received in love? Does she know it doesn't make her any less wanted?

"I've loved before," Dean says, "but as my true mate, my feelings for your papa are different. Our souls knew each other before we were born. That doesn't erase what I felt for my past partners. It's just not comparable."

"But he prefers Jack over me. He's way more like Daddy."

"Why do you think he prefers Jack?"

"Because he's calm and tidy. I am loud and Papa calls me his chaos queen."

Dean chuckles softly while Castiel feels like dying where he's sitting on the top of the stairs. But he doesn't want to plough into this moment. He needs to trust Dean if he wants them to become a family.

"Your papa loves you very much, Claire. He's so proud of you. And he trusts you with many things. Jack is simply younger. He still needs to learn stuff you're already mastering. It's like with the Death Star. You assisted me because you're a big girl. And Papa assisted Jack because he still needed help."

"But Jack just needs to cry and he gets everything," Claire argues.

"Is that so?"

There's a long pause after that. Castiel can imagine Claire's thinking face. She does look like her alpha father when she's pondering things.

"Not really. I guess Jackie cries more because he's younger."

Dean hums in agreement. "And what does Papa do when you cry?"

"He comforts me," Claire admits. "But he didn't tonight."

Dean sighs. "I think your Papa knew that you could handle yourself better than your brother at that moment. And I'm sure he can't wait to get out of the nest to comfort you. What do you think, we tidy up here and after, you join them, hm?"

"Okay," Claire says, and Castiel can hear plastic hitting the cardboard box. He gets up quietly and returns to the nest, his heart light and heavy all at once.

It doesn't take long until Claire crawls into the nest and into Castiel's arms.

"Hey, honey. How are you?" he asks.

"I'm sorry, Papa," she snivels.

"For what, baby?"

"For shouting. And the mess I made. I helped Dean clean it up."

"Thank you… I'm sorry for not handling the situation better. Sometimes, I wish I could be two, so that I could comfort both of you at the same time. But I'm only one, Claire. And I won't always do things right. But I love you more than anything and anyone in the world. You and Jack are my heart."

"You should make some space for Dean in it," Claire says matter-of-factly.

Castiel chuckles. "He's firmly holding it, Claire. And I love him very much."

"He said I need to be a big girl."

"Well, you are a big girl, but you're also my baby. Don't worry too much, Claire. It's okay to have big emotions and to show them. But sometimes, others won't react perfectly, and that's okay too, as long as we're talking about it after, alright?"

"Alright, Papa."

"Did Dean leave?"

"I offered him my bed," Claire says, yawning.

"That was very generous of you, honey."

"I like him."

Castiel can't help but smile.

"He's a good alpha," he says.

Claire hums in agreement and dozes off. Castiel, on the other hand, lies awake for a long time, processing the evening. It's been a lot, but – at least, he hopes so – this might have been a large leap on their journey of becoming a family.

Chapter Text

Castiel stares at Dean's back for a long while without drawing attention to himself. It's beautiful to watch with what ease Dean simply exists in his kitchen, flipping pancakes, frying eggs and bacon. He doesn't know that he's wearing the apron Castiel's mate got him maybe two years ago for his birthday. Castiel has worn it only once, but Dean looks great in it.

"Oh," Dean presses out, startled, when he sees Castiel leaning against the doorframe. "Good morning."

"Good morning, Dean," Castiel says, a smile playing on his lips. "I see you made yourself home here."

"I couldn't sleep. Didn't want to wake up you and the pups. Is everything alright?"

"I think so. Thanks to you."

Dean gives him a lopsided smile and closes the space between them. He places a quick peck on Castiel's lips before he returns to the stove.

"I can't remember having bacon in my fridge."

"I did a quick supply run. Family breakfast needs bacon, and a little birdie told me that Claire loves it on pancakes."

"Jack sure knows his sister. He loves to drown his in maple syrup."

"I bought a bottle too, just in case," Dean smirks.

"You're spoiling us," Castiel chuckles.

"You haven't seen my blueberry topping yet."

"Bl–blueberry topping? How do you know?" Castiel croaks.

"Your brother popped in at work."

"Which one?" Castiel asks, his stomach tying into knots.

"Gabriel."

"Oh, my god. I'm so sorry," Castiel blurts out precautionally. "I didn't even know he was in town."

"Your mother sent him. Apparently, the Roadhouse is below her standards, so he volunteered."

"This is all my fault. I told her where you work to prove that you're an honest man. I'm so sorry, Dean."

"Hey, don't get your panties in a twist. It was fine. He gave me the shovel talk, we shared a whiskey, and he told me to take good care of you."

"And that I love blueberries," Castiel says, eyes suddenly watering.

"Yeah. He loves you."

"And I love you," Castiel blurts out.

Dean gapes at him for a long moment, then turns to switch off the gas.

"Don't you want to wait with those words until you've tasted my breakfast?" Dean chuckles.

"It could all be burnt to ashes, and it wouldn't change a thing. Thanks for being so patient with me," Castiel says and cups Dean's cheek.

"No problem," Dean says but his eyes are vulnerable.

"I love you, Dean. You're already acting like an alpha for this family. A good one."

"Well, my mom used to say, an alpha is only as good as the omega at their side. So I must be a good one," he smirks.

"That smells so good!" Jack calls, running down the stairs.

"Is that bacon?" Claire yells right behind him.

"Yes," Dean says. "PJ breakfast okay?" he asks Castiel.

"Oh, yes, pleeeeease, Papa?" Claire asks.

"Yes, yes!" Jack calls.

"I guess I'm outnumbered," Castiel chuckles. "But only if you two set the table."

"Thank you!" the siblings shout and collect cutlery before they run to the dining table in the living room.

"You gotta give me the house rules," Dean chuckles, looking after them.

"There are less than you think, alpha. And most of them are amendable."

"Good to know," Dean says. "Can you put on the coffee? I have no idea how this drip stuff works."

"Are you an instant or automated coffee machine guy?"

"Whatever's available. I ain't picky as long as it's hot and black."

Castiel nods.

"It's nice to have you here on a Saturday morning," he says, brushing his hand over Dean's arm before he fills the coffee filter.

"It is nice," Dean agrees. "I love your bed hair."

Castiel chuckles.

"I probably look like a mess."

"You look sexy," Dean says and winks at him.

"In my old pyjamas?" he huffs in disbelief.

"Always," Dean says before pressing a plate with pancakes into Castiel's hands and a kiss on his lips.

Castiel swallows hard. No one has ever called him that. It does things to his insides.

"Thank you," he all but whispers.

"You know you're sexy, right?" Dean asks, eyebrows furrowed.

"It's not a term I would apply to myself."

"Then I hope to change that," Dean says and carries the pans to the dining table. Castiel needs a moment to gather himself, the whiff of aroused alpha in his nose making him dizzy. Dean will be the death of him.

"Here, Claire," Castiel says and hands Claire the new grave candle. She looks at it for a long moment and starts crying.

"What's wrong?" Jack asks, stopping to clean the gravestone.

"Nothing," Claire whimpers.

"Hey, honey. It's okay," Castiel says and squats down next to her. "Are you missing Dad?"

Claire makes a movement with her head, half nodding/half shaking.

"Wanna talk about it?" Castiel asks.

Jack brushes his hand over his sister's head. "There, there," he says.

"I sometimes forget that he's gone," Claire says, brushing her hands over her face.

Castiel nods in understanding.

"That's okay. Dad wouldn't have wanted his Claire-bear to forget living because she's always mourning him."

"I didn't think of Daddy all day," Claire snivels.

"Baby, that's nothing bad."

"When was the last time you thought of him?" Claire asks.

Castiel swallows hard. He only ever thinks about his mate whenever he's comparing him to Dean lately. It's hard not to.

"This morning."

"Why?"

"Because Dean was wearing the apron Dad gave me."

"You never wear it," Claire shrieks, all of a sudden.

"Because I simply get changed if I spill something on my clothes," Castiel explains calmly, praying that they're not bothering anyone in the graveyard.

"You never wear his pearls either," she shouts. Castiel doesn't even know where she has this info from. Grandma Novak, likely.

"I'm not really a pearl person, Claire. I'm keeping them safe for you. They've been passed down in your father's family for generations. One day, you or your spouse might wear them."

He takes Claire's hand but she pulls it back.

"What's wrong, honey?"

"You told Dean you love him," Claire says.

"You've heard that, huh?"

"You never said that to Dad," the girl snivels.

Castiel exhales slowly. "Dad never said that to me either, Claire. But that doesn't mean that we didn't deeply care for each other. And I'll be forever grateful that he blessed me with you and your brother."

"Do you think he was happy?" Claire whispers.

Castiel thinks of the omega at the funeral. "I think he was very happy," he says. Happier than him, so much is clear. But Castiel has Dean now. Another man who hasn't told him that he loves him. Maybe it's simply not alpha-like. Dean sure acts like a man in love. That must be enough.

"And I bet, wherever your dad is now, he's happy to have had you."

Jack nods enthusiastically.

Castiel brushes the tears off his daughter's cheeks and opens his arms. She stumbles into them, having a good cry against his shoulder. Castiel's legs are hurting from long minutes of holding her, but Claire's pain is surely so much bigger than his aching bones.

"You look as if you haven't slept all night," Dean says as he comes to pick up the kids.

"Because I haven't. Jack is running a fever. I couldn't get it down. I have to ask for a raincheck, Dean. I'm sorry."

"Oh, poor Jackie. I hope it's nothing bad."

"He's sleeping now, but I was looking forward to our brunch date."

"No problem. Do you need anything?"

"I'm just glad I don't need to do the school run with a feverish kid in the backseat."

Dean nods.

"I could come after dropping Claire off and take care of him so that you can get some shut-eye."

"Dean, that's not necessary. I'll just lie down with him."

"And you think you'll get rest, all worried with a living hot-water bag in your arms?"

Castiel's lips curl into a smile. "You won't leave without me agreeing, will you?"

"No," the alpha smirks.

"Thank you, Dean. I think a few hours of proper sleep would make a big difference for the rest of the day."

"Alright then. Hey, Claire. Ready to go?"

"I hate Monday mornings," she grinds out, dragging her feet, still half-asleep.

"Everyone does, Claire. It's why God put it at the beginning of the week, so that it's over and done with."

"You don't even believe in God, Dean. You never come with us to church," Claire mumbles as she puts on her trainers.

"It's too dangerous. What if I go up in flames as soon as I step through the portal?" Dean asks. Claire gapes at him with wide eyes.

Castiel chuckles. "He's only messing with you, Claire. As long as he doesn't touch the holy water, he's good."

Dean nods seriously.

"You're joking," Claire says, eyes jumping between her father and Dean.

"I'm not joking when I say you have to leave or you'll run late," Castiel says and takes his spare key from the key cabinet. "Here. Let yourself in, Dean. It's probably better if you have one. Kelly goes on a business trip to Japan, and I won't give one to anyone else."

Dean takes the keyfob with a shy smile. It was only meant as a backup in case something happens, but it's clearly been perceived as something else. Not that he would correct Dean's assumption. Hopefully, his alpha will spend much more time with them in the future.

"See you later, Cass," Dean says. Claire presses a goodbye kiss on Castiel's cheek and runs to the Impala.

"Thank you, Dean," Castiel says.

"Don't mention it. Croissants?" Dean asks.

"With chocolate filling, please," Castiel says.

"Wouldn't think of any other kind," Dean replies and leaves. Castiel watches them until the Impala turns the corner.

He breathes a sigh and closes the door. He just hopes this will be a one-day malaise.

Chapter Text

"He's going to be okay, Claire. You did the right thing calling me. Can you go upstairs and get Jack and yourself ready for bed?"

Castiel can't open his eyes, his lids too heavy, a bone-deep tiredness pulling him down. His shirt is soaked, his throat parched. He can't breathe through his nose.

Shit!

Jack passed on his bug. Castiel can't afford to be sick! He's got so many things to do. Halloween is just around the corner.

He tries to sit up but his head is killing him.

"Hey, sweetheart. You're not looking good," Dean says.

"Sorry, I don't…" Castiel's half-hearted attempt at a quip dies on his tongue. Speaking frigging hurts.

"Hey, it's alright. Don't push yourself."

Castiel snorts a laugh but that hurts, too. "Sorry. Just… a minute," he presses out.

What time is it? Does he need to get the kids ready for school? Did they have dinner? He can't remember. He just lay down on the sofa for a nap and then…

"What are you doing here?" he croaks.

"Claire called me when Kelly didn't pick up her phone. God, you're burning up," Dean says, feeling his forehead. "Did you take something?"

Castiel shakes his head. He hates being sick. It destroys all his plans.

"What time…?"

"Half past nine."

Castiel can finally get Dean into focus. He's wearing his work clothes.

Shit!

He pushes himself up, view swimming. "Why didn't she just wake me?"

"She tried but couldn't. She sounded really scared."

Castiel looks at the coffee table and the untouched PB&J on it. He glances over to the kitchen, a small pile of plates and a few emptied yoghurt containers sitting on the breakfast bar. Claire made dinner for all of them.

Pride and shame mix weirdly in his aching chest.

"Smart girl," he says.

"She is," Dean agrees. "Where is your medical stuff?"

"Upstairs bathroom," Castiel presses out, unable to protest the doting of his alpha.

"I'll be back in a minute," Dean says.

He keeps his promise, returning with a glass of water and an assortment of pills in his hands.

"I'm really sorry," Castiel says.

"For what?"

"Friday nights are good money."

Dean huffs a laugh. "Don't worry about it. Maybe you should eat something, huh?"

Castiel doesn't really feel like it, but he is the only one in the family who prefers jelly over jam. And Claire made it for him. She's an angel.

"I should tuck in the kids," Castiel says nonetheless.

"Um… they asked me to," Dean says. Castiel wishes he could smell him through his stuffy nose to assess how he's feeling about it. But Dean surprises him first.

"Are you okay with that?" he probes.

"Are you okay with that?" Castiel asks back.

"It's your bedroom."

"I hope it'll be yours, too, soon," Castiel says, his sickness disabling all filters.

"O–okay," Dean stutters. "Wanna stay on the couch?"

"Hm," Castiel replies and swallows his pills. "Jack needs a lullaby or he won't fall asleep," he murmurs.

"Does Metallica work?"

"Metallica?"

Dean shrugs. "Always calms me down."

Castiel chuckles. "Give it a try."

Castiel wakes up in the wee hours, moonlight filtering through the living room windows. He needs a moment to get his bearings. When did he eat his sandwich? He can't remember.

He sits up straight, only waiting for his head to stop throbbing before he stumbles upstairs. The sight that opens up in front of him when he enters his bedroom roots him to the spot.

Dean is lying in his nest, borrowed pyjama bottoms cladding his legs. Jack is lying in his arms, Claire sleeping with her back pressed against Dean's.

To say Castiel's heart is overflowing with fondness is a massive understatement.

He leans against the doorframe and just watches them for a long moment, tears running over his face. Is that gratitude or simply exhaustion? It doesn't matter.

This is his alpha. Their alpha. Dean is part of Castiel's pack. He doesn't even question the untraditional thought. His wolf is so damn pleased seeing his true mate in his nest, caring for his pups at that. A rustling purr works out of Castiel's chest, making Dean stir in the nest.

"Cass," he croaks, voice heavy with sleep. "You okay?"

"I think my fever went down. Just feeling a bit woozy.—You're in my nest."

"Sorry, I meant to ask but you were out when I came down and the pups were bustling," Dean whispers.

Castiel smiles.

"Do you think there's still space in there for me?"

Dean chuckles warmly and pushes Jack gently to the side of the nest, making room between himself and Claire. Before Castiel has the chance to squeeze in between his alpha and his daughter, Claire rolls in her sleep, snuggling up to Dean again. Castiel chuckles. He knows that move just too well.

"No alpha snuggles for me, I see," he pouts as he lies down next to her.

"In the morning," Dean whispers.

"In the morning," Castiel agrees.

Castiel drags himself down the stairs in the afternoon. The cough syrup Dean got him in the morning knocked him out. At least, he got a bit more sleep under his belt. Which is good, because he promised his kids to go trick-or-treating with them. Which feels like a Herculean task, but what has to be done, has to be done. He'll have to forgo the promised Halloween menu and decorations, though. He just hopes Claire will forgive him. It's her favourite holiday.

In the living room, he runs into Charlie.

"Oh, hey, Cass! How are you?" she asks.

"Um… better. What are you doing here?"

"I swapped with Dean. He had to run some errands."

"Charlie helped us put up the decorations," Jack calls excitedly.

"I hope that was okay," the alpha says.

"Yes, but…"

"But?"

"You surely have something better to do on a Saturday."

"Are you kidding? Your kids are amazing. We had loads of fun, didn't we?"

"We made pigs in a mummy blanket and googly pasta," Claire explains. "And Dean said he's getting a costume to go trick-or-treating with us."

Castiel stares at Charlie. "He can't skip work two nights in a row."

"Dean will always drop everything for his family, Cass. You better get used to it," Charlie chuckles.

Castiel nods, but he doesn't like this one bit. It's all so lopsided. Dean could have just told the kids that their father is sick and Halloween was cancelled.

"Dean!" Claire all but screams. "You look so cool!"

Dean ruffles her hair. "I'm Batman, and I'm looking for two masked helpers to save Halloween," he says, sounding silly and sexy, all at once.

Claire and Jack share a silent look before they race up the stairs.

"Hey, Cass. Feeling better?" Dean asks.

"Still a bit…" Castiel waves his hands through the air. "Dean, you shouldn't…"

"Take care of our… your pups?"

"You've already done so much," Castiel protests an already lost cause.

"Nonsense. You may look like a ghost, but I doubt you'll make it down the street. Also… I never went trick-or-treating. I'm pumped!"

"Not even with Sam?"

"Tried it once, but he's afraid of clowns."

Castiel knits his brow together but doesn't comment on it.

"Can you close the back?" Claire asks, bumping into Dean, pressing a moustache over her mouth.

"Mario!" Dean exclaims. "An Italian plumber is exactly what we need to protect the town. And… a fluffy unicorn?" He looks questioningly at the youngest Novak.

"I looooove unicorns. I even have a tail! See?" Jack asks, trying to reach the short stub, but only running in circles.

"I hope you used the bathroom before you put your costumes on," Castiel says. Both kids groan and shuffle away pouting.

"Thanks for helping me out today," Dean says to Charlie who is packing her stuff.

"My pleasure. Don't forget to ask him about you-know-what. It was great to see you again, Cass. Get well soon! Peace out, bit..."

Dean gives her a strict look.

"...everyone!" she changes course, and with that, she's out of the house.

Castiel sinks down on the sofa in front of what looks like a snack buffet.

"Dean," he says quietly. "You don't have to prove yourself to me. You know that, right?"

Dean takes off his Batman mask and fills his mouth with a handful of gummy spiders.

"I'm just doing my job," he shrugs.

"You're not. That's what I mean. You said you'd make good money this weekend."

"And?" he asks, chewing.

"Dean."

"That's what mates are for. You'd do the same for me."

"I'd try," Castiel allows.

"See? No big deal. You rest, and I'll take a million pictures. I promise."

Castiel chuckles.

"What would have been your costume?" Dean asks.

"I got some angel wings. I'm not much into stuff like that. My mate always went with the kids."

Dean nods in understanding.

"Heeey! Ready for take-off?" he asks the returning pups.

"Yes!" Claire declares.

"Listen to Dean," Castiel reminds them.

"Yes, Papa," Claire says, rolling her eyes.

"Have fun!" Castiel chuckles.

Dean presses a kiss to his cheek. "Don't eat all the sweets," he teases.

"I won't. And you neither."

Castiel watches the three leave the house, then slumps down on the sofa and switches on the telly. Charmed flickers over the screen. God, he loved that show when he was young. It's probably the only spooky show he'll ever be able to stomach, but there is no one to judge him for it.

"I was watching that," Castiel murmurs when Dean changes the channel.

"Sorry, I thought you were asleep," Dean chuckles and switches back.

"Where are the pups?"

"Sugar coma. They're in bed. So you did doze off," Dean teases.

"Sorry. I haven't been this sick in ages.—You tucked the kids in again?"

"Yes," Dean smirks.

"I could get used to that," Castiel chuckles. "It's been my job ever since Claire was born. She's just not ready to move out of the nest."

Dean hums noncommittally.

"It's so nice having you here," Castiel says.

"I enjoy spending time with y'all. My place is incredibly boring in comparison."

"But also more tidy and quiet."

"I miss the chaos and the noise. I miss you, Cass," Dean says and pulls a face immediately after.

"Then… don't miss me and move in," Castiel whispers.

Dean's head snaps towards him. "Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack. I don't want to do this alone, Dean. And I don't want to watch you drive away anymore. I wanna cuddle on Saturday mornings, and I wanna go grocery shopping with you. I want my pups to have an alpha. And I want my nest to never not smell of you again."

"That cough syrup is a helluva drug, huh?" Dean teases, but his eyes look vulnerable.

"I mean it, Dean. I want us to be pack."

Dean's eyes grow suspiciously soft and glittery.

"You know I bring my own pack of mongrels with me, right?"

Castiel chuckles.

"I love your friends. Your brother is nice. I think we'll get along. My family, on the other hand…"

"If they don't want you to be happy, then they're not worth a single thought, Cass."

Castiel nods and shuffles around until his head ends up on Dean's lap. Strong yet gentle fingers card through his messy hair, rubbing soothingly into his scalp.

"I also want cuddles on the sofa," he mumbles. He doesn't even know where this is coming from, but Dean's warm chuckle is worth the embarrassment. His snuggles, all the more.

Castiel is one lucky bastard.

Chapter Text

"Did you have fun last night?" Castiel asks his kids over breakfast.

"It was awesome!" Jack replies. Castiel chuckles. Jack definitely picked up that word from Dean.

"What about you, Claire?" Castiel probes his rather quiet daughter.

"We met Kaia. She was so pretty in her Princess Peach dress."

"The two were the perfect couple," Dean chuckles. Castiel grins to himself. The two girls are so sweet together, always playing Wii at the house of Kaia's foster family ever since the girl moved in next door. His Claire isn't the most social, so Castiel is glad that she found someone other than her brother to spend time with.

"Only if I present as an alpha," Claire mumbles.

Castiel's smile falters. The poor girl presented as an omega way too early. That his kids haven't presented despite the trauma of losing one parent is one of the few signs Castiel accepts as proof that he's doing a good job parenting them. Poor Kaia went through so much. He's glad that Claire decided to be her friend. Though, he guesses Kaia might be her very first crush. Dean seems to think the same.

"Charlie's girlfriend is an alpha, too," he says.

Claire gapes at him.

"Really?"

"Uh-huh. I hope you'll meet her soon. She's awesome.—Speaking of which: Do you have plans for Thanksgiving?"

Castiel's face falls. He had all but forgotten about that sword of Damocles hanging over his head.

"Dinner at my mother's," he croaks.

"Oh," Dean says noncommittally.

"And you?"

"Charlie invited me… us. To welcome you three to the family."

Castiel's heart clenches in his chest. His mother hasn't mentioned Dean since their talk. Thanksgiving would be the perfect day to introduce Dean to his family. The focus wouldn't all be on them with some of his siblings and their families around. It would be a good time to announce Dean's moving in, too, and prepare everyone for a mating. Only if his kids agree to all of it, of course.

But Castiel shouldn't get ahead of himself. Dean didn't even properly agree to the first, and while they touched on the latter, Castiel is too much of a pessimist to trust any of this until he's carrying Dean's bite. And isn't that a thought that makes his stomach flip? In a good way.

Still. They haven't even had sex yet, and he's thinking about bonding? Maybe Dean will hate his body. The stretch marks, the soft tissue that his pregnancies left behind and that no amount of running has managed to make disappear. Dean deserves someone better. That Batman costume didn't leave much to the imagination. His alpha is brawny.

"Why are you smelling sad, Papa?" Claire asks.

Castiel swallows hard.

"Nothing, honey. Just… a sad thought," he says and reins in his scent. He glances over the table at Dean who is frowning at him.

"You should get ready, kids. Dean said he'll drop you off at church. Today is Sunday school with Pastor Meg."

"Oh, she's the coolest," Claire exclaims.

"She is," Castiel agrees and cleans Jack's face. "Clean clothes are on the edge of the nest."

The kids storm upstairs, and Castiel slowly releases the breath still stuck in his throat.

"Why are you smelling sad, omega? Dean asks.

Castiel huffs a laugh. Leave it to Dean to not let this slide.

"It's getting serious, and I'm worried it will all go down the drain," he answers honestly.

"Us?"

"Mmm."

"Why's that?"

Castiel exhales slowly. "I'm afraid the kids will veto our relationship. And I'm scared my mother will put you off. She has a way…"

Dean chuckles.

"I ain't t scared. Mothers-in-law love me. My charm is irresistible," he smirks and reaches out for Castiel's hand, weaving their fingers together. "And Claire asked me last night if I'd be moving in, now that we've shared a nest. I asked what she thought about it, and she replied that it is weird but neat at the same time. That she's glad that I'm taking care of you and making you happy. And… she asked if we would have more pups together."

Castiel blows out a breath.

"And what did you say to that?"

"That we haven't talked about that yet but that I would be more than happy to be their stepfather. She seemed to be happy enough with that answer."

Castiel nods.

"Do you want more pups?"

Dean huffs a laugh. "Maybe. You?"

Castiel shrugs. "I like the idea. But… another pregnancy? I don't know."

Dean squeezes his hand. "I'm good with both options."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Dean says and shrugs. "We're already a family. Your pups are my pups."

Castiel quirks a smile.

"So… will you move in?"

Dean squints at him.

"That wasn't a cough syrup-induced question last night?"

"No. I'm done running. This last week… it drove home how much I want you here. Not just as a guest."

Dean's face breaks out into a radiant smile. "I guess I'll need moving boxes then."

Castiel laughs out loud in an explosion of relief and joy. It turns into a terrible coughing fit, but he doesn't regret it for a single second.

"Do I look good enough?" Dean asks, pulling at his dress shirt collar, looking nervously at his future in-laws' house.

"I thought you're not scared of my mother," Castiel teases and helps his kids out of the Impala, straightening Claire's dress.

"That depends. Will you still love me if she hates me?"

"Papa will love you forever and ever," Jack exclaims.

Castiel chuckles. "You're right, Jackie," he says. "It's gonna be okay, Dean."

"Well, who do we have here?" a voice comes from behind. "Mother didn't tell me that we're having a special guest tonight."

"Gabriel," Dean greets him, shaking his hand. Castiel's eyes jump from one alpha to the other. Gabriel gives him a toothy grin.

"I'm surprised there isn't a bite on his neck yet. You two smell great together," he says in Dean's direction. Castiel furrows his brow, cautiously scenting the air, but his thought process is interrupted by a familiar voice.

"As if you wad hae bitten me in the first year," his mate Rowena supplies from behind.

"We're not true mates, darling," Gabriel says with a smirk plastered on his face.

"Nice to meet you," Dean says, ignoring the banter.

"Nice to meet you, too, Dean. I knew our dear Castiel wadna just jump right in. He's allergic to fun."

"I'm not," Castiel protests.

"I can attest to that," Dean says, smiling warmly at him. "I still hope your Thanksgiving party has an open bar."

"I know where my mother hides the good stuff," Gabriel smirks.

"Good," Dean says and presses the car keys into Castiel's hand.

"Alphas," Rowena says, rolling her eyes. "I'll take the Auchentoshan," she tells her mate and links arms with her brother-in-law. "He's very handsome," she murmurs into Castiel's ear.

"He is," he whispers back, tiny butterflies storming his stomach. With Gabriel and Rowena on their side, this evening can't be that bad.

"I hear you're saving for opening your own business," Castiel's mother gets to the point shortly after their arrival. They haven't even had dinner yet.

Dean glances at Castiel whose cheeks go up in flames.

"I'm nursing the thought," Dean replies, not throwing him to the wolves. "But my priorities lie in providing for Castiel and the pups. My job at the Harvelles is secure, and the patrons love me. I think my personal dreams can wait until the kids are finished with college or whatever they plan on doing with their lives."

Castiel draws a very needed breath, grateful for Dean's quick thinking and generous words.

"I heard there is a bar for sale on the east side," Castiel's mother says, ignoring Dean's little speech.

"The old Demon's Den, yes," Dean says, much to Castiel's surprise. "I'm afraid my funds aren't big enough to afford it."

"You know… the market value of my son's house has risen over the last few years," Mrs Shurley says. Dean and Castiel share a look.

"It is a beautiful home in a good neighbourhood," Dean states. Castiel is glad that his alpha is masking his scent. He doesn't want to reek what Dean is feeling right now.

"I'm sure if you sold it after your mating and moved closer to the bar, you could afford it."

Castiel gapes at his mother. Is prestige truly more important to her than him and his pups? The east side is cheaper for a reason. It's not a bad area but much more crowded, with nary a family house in sight.

"Well, Mrs Shurley, I don't intend to enrich myself through my bond with your son. His house is the only home your grandchildren have ever known and a lovely memory of their alpha father at that. I can assure you that I won't ever let Castiel or his children go short. But I am the new addition to his pack, and I enjoy family life as it is. I love my job, too. Castiel is content, and we crunched the numbers. We'll be fine."

Mrs Shurley pierces him with her eyes. Dean meets her gaze dead on.

"Honouring their father is fine and dandy, Mr Winchester. But you surely want to claim your omega properly."

Castiel swallows hard. It's a discussion they have avoided so far. He also doubts that Dean and his mother could ever be on the same page when it comes to the roles of alphas and omegas. But Dean doesn't take the bait.

"In any meaningful way, yes," Dean replies.

"Adoption of his pups?" Mrs Shurley probes.

"If Castiel and the kids want that."

"And if not?"

"Then not. I'm not your son's owner, Mrs Shurley. I am his mate, his partner. I will be the alpha he needs."

"Good alpha," Rowena coughs into her whiskey glass. Castiel struggles to keep a straight face.

"What about future pups?" his mother probes.

Dean shrugs. "It's a bit early to discuss that," he says firmly.

"My son isn't the youngest," Mrs Shurley hisses.

"You weren't either, Mother, and still you mated again," Gabriel chimes in.

"That was different. I mated with your uncle," Mrs Shurely says. "It was all kept in the family."

"As if we could ever forget," Gabriel says, rolling his eyes. "Just leave it be, Mother. Dean is a good man, and Castiel is mature enough to figure out with him what their relationship should look like."

Castiel sends a thankful look his brother's way. Gabriel can be a pain in the ass, but he has his moments.

Mrs Shurley works her jaw for a long moment, sighing in defeat.

"Welcome to the family, Alpha Winchester," she says. "May you be more successful with taming this stubborn omega than I was."

Dean quirks a smile but keeps his mouth shut. Castiel appreciates the truce. Some battles aren't worthy to be fought.

"Thank you," Castiel says after laying Jack down in the nest next to his sister. Both kids fell asleep on the drive home.

It was nice, steering the Impala through the night, holding his only slightly inebriated alpha's hand. Dean was still strong and steady enough to carry Claire up the stairs. Castiel would lie if he pretended that this casual show of strength didn't do things to his wolf. Omega instincts are stupid sometimes.

"What are you thinking 'bout?" Dean asks quietly.

"Nothing."

"It's not nothing I smell," Dean smirks. There's this damn heat in Castiel's cheeks again.

"I…" he starts the deflection but trails off. There's no use in postponing this. Not after Dean taking a stand, facing his mother's hostility and coming out on top of it.

"I think I… I need you to see me," Castiel croaks.

"What do you mean?" Dean asks, arousal slowly creeping into his scent.

"I need to feel you. Your skin on mine. Your eyes on me," Castiel says, wetting his lips. "I need to know if you desire me."

"Isn't that obvious?" Dean asks, confusion written all over his face.

"I don't know. I'm not used to it. No one ever wanted me."

Dean's face grows mellow in understanding. He walks around the nest and takes Castiel's hand.

"Guest room?" he asks.

Castiel worries his bottom lip between his teeth. "I hid the unfolded laundry in there."

Dean clicks his tongue and chuckles in amusement. "I knew you were hiding dark secrets from me," he teases. "Come. Let's push them to the side and…" He huffs a laugh.

"What?" Castiel asks.

"I nearly said 'make love'. Must be the bourbon talking."

"Sure it is," Castiel smirks. Making love sounds really good. His wolf likes the ring of it, too. "But no knotting. In case the kids wake up," Castiel says firmly.

Dean rolls his eyes and pulls Castiel into a kiss, their scents wafting around them as they sink into each other. Castiel freezes, inhaling deeply.

"What's wrong?" Dean asks, alarm in his voice.

"Nothing," Castiel says, smiling. "Don't you smell it?"

Dean takes a deep breath, his eyes growing wide.

"That's what Gabriel meant," he presses out, exhaling deeply once more.

Castiel nods, holding in a giddy snicker. Their scents have shifted, each carrying a note of the other's. A scent bond, their souls too eager to join to wait for Castiel's next heat. They are more than compatible.

"Son of a bitch," Dean breathes. "You smell even better now. If that's even possible."

Castiel chuckles, unrestrained happiness exploding in his chest.

"I want my scent all over you," he murmurs. A low, delighted rumble vibrates out of his alpha before his lips close over Castiel's once more.

They tumble to the guest room, kissing and groping, muffled laughs falling from their lips as they push off each other's clothes.

Castiel hopes that the pups will sleep all through the night.

Chapter Text

Five months later

"Claire? Come on! We're running late," Dean calls from the entrance hall as he helps Jack with putting on his between-seasons jacket.

"Claire!" he repeats louder, his voice carrying through the house.

Castiel groans in the bathroom. Just a few more days until spring break, and everyone's nerves are raw.

"Claire, please listen to Dean and hurry," he calls through the opened door. She should have come to hug him goodbye at least ten minutes ago. What's taking her so long?

He doesn't get an answer either, so he wipes the shaving foam off his face and goes to search for her. He finds her in her room, sitting on her bed.

"Hey. What's up, honey?" he asks when he sees the tears streaming over her face.

"No–nothing," she snivels.

Castiel doesn't understand. She was her usual grumpy morning self at the breakfast table.

"This doesn't look like nothing," he says gently.

"I just mi–miss Daddy."

Oh.

"Okay," he says and sits down next to her. "Is your heart particularly heavy today?"

She shakes her head.

"It's okay to miss him. And it's okay to cry over missing him."

Claire doesn't respond, but Dean calls for her once more, "God dammit! Claire!"

"I'll take care of her, Dean," Castiel shouts. "Take Jackie to school."

"Okay," comes from downstairs. Castiel can hear the worry in his alpha's voice, but there will be time to explain everything later. When he knows what prompted this sudden bout of grief. Or when he's managed to comfort her, at least.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asks when Claire keeps on crying in silence. Her lips quiver, struggling with the words forming on her tongue, so it seems. Castiel waits her out patiently.

"I… I'm forgetting him."

Castiel's heart clenches in his chest. He's tried everything to keep her father's memory alive. He's still part of their conversations and pictures of him are hanging in the family photo gallery despite some newer additions, one showing Dean and the kids in their Halloween costumes and one of Castiel in Dean's arms at the alpha's birthday party. But those are only additions. And they celebrated their alpha father's birthday. Castiel even got a framed portrait of him for Claire's room.

He looks at it. Pleading his past mate to give him the right words to console their daughter.

"What do you mean?" he asks. "His touch? His scent?"

Claire shakes her head.

"He smelt like chalk and driftwood," she croaks.

"That's right," Castiel confirms.

He never cared much for his old alpha's scent. Much different to Dean's. He could bathe in his campfire whisky and the chocolate notes that compliment it when Dean is content. It mixes so deliciously with his marshmallow honeycomb, a scent his old mate found too sweet and that Castiel only recently learnt not to suppress any longer. Because Dean loves it, loves everything about him.

"See? You still remember him," Castiel says gently.

"I called Dean 'Dad' earlier," Claire all but whispers.

"What?" Castiel asks, flabbergasted.

"He told me to go brush my teeth, and I said, 'Okay, Dad.' I…" she trails off.

Castiel pulls her into his side. "That was just a blooper. Dean is Dean, and always will be. Just like your daddy will always be your daddy."

"But he does all the things Dad did."

Castiel breathes a sigh. It's true. He watches animated series with Claire, and builds Legos with her. He asks how it was in school and comes to her games, even without Castiel asking him to. Their Mario Kart battles are legendary. He also does the morning school run, fixes lunch boxes for picky eater Jack, teaches Claire self-defence, and applauded proudly after Jack's dance class had their first performance. Dean is and does everything Castiel could want from an alpha, and so much more that his old mate, traditional as he was, would have never been, much less would have done.

"He is going to be our family alpha. Of course, he does fatherly things. But that doesn't mean that he will ever replace Dad in your heart, Claire. And if your tongue slips, now and then, then it's just that. A slip. That doesn't make you love your daddy any less."

Claire nods but worries her bottom lip.

"Do you think it's okay that I like Dean so much?" she asks.

"Oh, Claire-bear, of course, it is. You have such a big heart. There is plenty of room in it for so many people. And it will expand to let even more people in who are dear to you."

"Is Daddy still in your heart?" Claire asks.

Castiel quirks a sad smile. "Your father will always be a part of me. He left the sweetest reminders with you and Jack, didn't he?"

Claire nods, barely dried-up tears flowing once again. Castiel pulls his daughter into a tight hug and presses a kiss into her hair.

"Do you wanna go visit Daddy? Just the two of us?"

"Now?" Claire snivels, eyes growing wide.

"Yes. And then, we could go to the café he liked so much."

"The one with the chocolate pancakes?"

"Hmm."

"But I just had breakfast."

Castiel chuckles. "We could walk to the cemetery and collect flowers for his grave along the way. I'm sure that'll work up our appetite. What do you say?"

"But it's a school day," she says, not really protesting.

"I can still take you there. I just thought you could do with a change today."

Claire nods. "That would be nice."

"Okay. I'll call your school and tell Dean real quick," Castiel says. Claire's arms tighten around him, and he hugs her even closer. "As soon as we've snuggled enough, huh?"

Claire presses her wet face against his shoulder, not letting go of him for long minutes.

"Sorry for just another raincheck," Castiel says when Dean comes home after midnight.

"Hey. Claire needed you," Dean waves off his apology and presses a kiss on his lips.

"Yes. But a bit of predictability would be nice, now and then," Castiel quips and folds another shirt from the laundry pile.

"I agree," Dean smirks. "What was it all about?"

Castiel exhales slowly.

"She struggled because she called you 'Dad' by mistake."

Dean nods in understanding.

"It's been happening lately. I didn't wanna make a big deal about it. Did she only realise this morning?"

"I suppose. But we talked about it. I think she's okay."

"Of course, she is. You're a great father."

Castiel exhales slowly.

"I'm trying. I just hope it's enough."

Dean embraces him from behind, snuggling against his back.

"It is," he says and presses his nose against Castiel's scent gland. "You smell divine," he groans. "Different."

"Cherry compote," Castiel croaks.

"Oh," Dean says.

"It's a bit late, but yeah. My heat is coming."

A deep rumble works out of Dean's chest right into Castiel's, making his wolf prance with glee.

"So…. The time has come," Dean says. "Are you ready? You know we can buy bite protection."

Castiel shakes his head.

"No. I want this. I want you, alpha."

A quiet moan falls from Castiel's lips when Dean's fangs press into his neck, not breaking the skin.

"I want you, too, omega," Dean says. "When will it start?"

"In two to three days," Castiel says. "I already stocked up on oatmeal."

Dean chuckles. "I'll tell Ellen that I'll be on heat leave. Does Kelly know already?"

"She does. She'll pick up the pups on Thursday."

"Awesome!" Dean smirks.

Awesome indeed.

Castiel and Dean wave the kids and Kelly goodbye until her car turns the corner. Castiel sinks back into Dean, relishing in his mate's sturdy presence and thick scent. Dean's sliding into a response rut, his wolf already spurred on by Castiel's developing heat.

"Are you ready?" Dean asks and presses a kiss on Castiel's neck, right where his mating bite will go.

"Yes, alpha," he says and turns in Dean's arms.

Their scent bond has grown even stronger over the last few days, their scents barely distinguishable. Castiel is excited that it's finally happening. He was worried that he might have an early menopause, but still, he is grateful that his body took its time to prepare for his first heat with a loving alpha. It gave them plenty of time to get to know each other and for Dean to build a relationship with their kids. And for them to figure out what kind of relationship they want.

Castiel doesn't want to wear Dean's collar, doesn't want to become his property. But he wants to wear a sign of their bond on his skin, wants to feel their bond anchored in his chest. Dean wants the same. They are equals. They're in love. Destiny might have brought them together, but they've chosen each other nonetheless.

The thought of his alpha wearing his mark is thrilling. Mrs Shurley voiced her displeasure, but Castiel doesn't care.

They have a beautiful family and might grow it even more if fate decides to grant them that. But no matter what life will bring, they'll be in it together. It's strange, despite it feeling right.

"What's wrong?" Dean asks when sadness mixes weirdly with Castiel's heat scent.

"If I hadn't lost my first mate, we couldn't have this," he says. "Sometimes, it feels like my happiness cost my children theirs."

Dean rumbles disapprovingly.

"No, sweetheart. No. All three of you deserve happiness after what you've gone through. And I promise to make you and our pups happy for the rest of our lives."

Castiel smiles up at Dean, his strong, beautiful, silly, smart, and caring alpha. He looks into his green eyes before he presses their lips together in a rapidly heating kiss.

"I love you," Dean speaks into Castiel's mouth.

"I love you, too, alpha," Castiel returns, happiness spiking in his scent.

"We should move this to our nest," Dean half-moans against Castiel's lips. Their nest that smells perfect with the addition of Dean, like family and home.

Castiel hums in agreement and takes a step back, a grin blooming on his face. Dean frowns at his strange antics. But then, Castiel turns slowly, eyes on his alpha as they turn to gold. Dean's widen in response, turning red when his omega sets off for a traditional omega chase.

Dean laughs out loud before he starts running. Castiel can feel his joy and lust faintly through their scent bond. He can't wait for their souls to stitch together, to become one. This is going to be good. He can feel it. Dean will keep his promises. And Castiel will love him forever in return.