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Chapter Text

For the past few months, this was how Lestat’s nights began: first he would wake up in the darkness of his coffin, always alone, staring at the satin-lining, contemplating going back to sleep.

He doubts Louis would even notice, or if he did he’d be glad to spend an evening without his company.

Eventually, Lestat would force himself to climb out, not even bothering to get dressed or comb his hair or even freshen up before he began his journey to the living room. He’d follow a well trodden path carved through the clutter of their now dilapidated home, all to take his place in the worn armchair at his beloved’s side.

Yes, his equally unkempt love who was as resentful and surly as he was beautiful. And despite his mussed hair, disheveled clothes, and the rodent blood currently drying on the corner of his mouth, Louis’ beauty was still as breathtaking to behold as ever.

Lestat groggily stood in the archway of their living room simply drinking in the sight of him.

Louis frustrated him to no end, but he loved him and so deeply.

He was it for him, Lestat knew this, but he couldn’t deny that he was unhappy with the current state of their union. Louis clearly wasn’t happy either, if his near constant gloom, and the venomous words he routinely directed at Lestat were any evidence.

He sighed.

“Louis, may I ask a question?”

Louis paused, hand poised to flip the page of the heavy tome he was reading.

“What?” he said flatly.

He didn’t look up.

“If you despise me as much as you clearly do, why stay? Or if you want the house, why not ask me to leave?”

Louis’ shoulders grew tense and he was silent for a long moment, nails digging into the binding of his book.

“Louis, your book.”

He flinched and relaxed his hands, setting the book down on his lap.

Still avoiding eye contact, he finally spoke, voice barely above a whisper.

“I can’t…”

Lestat sighed again, already exhausted by this conversation.

“Then tell me what to do to fix this. We can’t live like this anymore Louis.”

Silence again. More silence.

Lestat shook his head and turned to walk away until—

“Why do you stay?”

Lestat glanced back at Louis, who was finally looking him in the eyes.

“Why not run off with your mistress?” he challenged, green eyes alight with anger.

“Because I love you,” Lestat said simply.

And he would never stop telling him that.

He just wished saying so would be a joyful thing once more instead of a source of pain.

He absentmindedly shifted his eyes to study a water damage stain on the ceiling.

Fuck, that was going to be a problem, he thought distantly. Yet another thing in this damn house that needed to be fixed.

Louis snorted at his answer, drawing his attention back to him.

How many times had he told him over the years? Why was it that Louis refused to believe him now? Had he ever believed him?

“Louis, she is a distraction,” he said tiredly.

How many times has he had to explain this to him?

“A confidante. I go to her to escape the gloom of this house and for a poor imitation of the affection and attention I would much rather receive from you.”

He chuckled ruefully.

“You should be grateful to her, honestly. Since my company is so unpleasant to you. Since you find me so repulsive that you won’t even allow me to touch you.”

Louis looked hurt for a moment, before his expression shifted into a glare.

“To answer your question,” he snapped, “I’d like for you to end things with her. That’d be a good fuckin’ start. But honestly? If you really wanna make things right, go find our daughter, apologize to her and bring her home.”

Louis picked his book up and cracked it open again, settling back against the sofa.

He began to read again, ignoring Lestat once more.

Sensing that he had been dismissed, Lestat turned on his heel and stomped back up to their bedroom, blinking back tears. He felt a profound sadness wash over him.

How did it get this bad between the two of them?

He wanted to blame Claudia, but knows they were struggling before she came into the picture. He also knows that Antoinette’s presence had been equally damaging, if not more, to their relationship.

But ultimately he still doesn’t understand the why of it all.

Why couldn’t they just be happy? Why was loving Claudia something that came so easily to Louis? Why was it so difficult for Louis to love him?

Loving Louis was effortless for Lestat.

He loved Louis. Loves him still. He always will.

And all Lestat wants is to be with Louis, forever.

To live out the rest of his days at his side. He can’t even begin to imagine a version of his life without him in it. He lost the ability to do so the night he first laid eyes on Louis.

And when Louis kissed him at the altar of that burning church, and accepted the Dark Gift, Lestat had believed that finally, finally, his love would be enough.

But like always it wasn’t.

Like always everything Lestat did was wrong. Like always, Lestat was wrong.

He was too loud, too frivolous, too cruel, too smothering, too pushy, too much.

How foolish he had been to believe things would’ve turned out differently.

Lestat slid off his rumpled robe and pajamas and changed into something presentable before thundering back down the stairs.

It was a petty, childish move designed to disturb Louis’ reading.

He dashed out the door without even bothering to see if it worked.

He needed some fresh air, a change of scenery, and a meal.

Lestat had spent days without sustenance, just sitting in that suffocating house with his resentful, melancholy lover.

Louis’ gloom had infected him so throughly that he lost his appetite, and had little interest in leaving the house let alone paying Antoinette a visit.

He knew it would happen too, but he had been feeling such an acute longing for Louis as of late that he didn’t care. He simply wanted to be with Louis, no matter how funereal doing so had actually been.

Lestat found a victim, a drunken man he caught stumbling by the docks, and drained him quickly before tossing his body into the water. The blond stared up at the night sky as the alcohol pleasantly buzzed in his veins and under his skin.

He was sated but would need to find another meal before he began his search. He would need all his strength for this.

He had his marching orders, so there was no point in putting things off. Louis had told him what he wanted.

And he would do anything for Louis.

***

Several nights later, Lestat caught Claudia’s scent.

He had decided to search the college Louis had excitedly read about in the newspaper the previous night.

Despite how wounded he had been at how Louis had ignored him, he had been so distracted by the memory of the joy on his face that he had cut his evening with Antoinette short and resumed his searching.

As he wandered about the campus, he scanned several of the student’s minds and caught enough glimpses of her to know that she had been there.

Claudia looked well, and the clothes she wore, the clothes of a young woman in college, suited her. She still looked girlish, of course, but it made her appear a little more mature.

Like she belonged there.

He lets himself imagine another life for her in that moment, one where she does belong there. As as a normal girl blossoming into adulthood.

She’d be studious, inquisitive, and hardworking. A voracious reader. She took after Louis in that way.

He doesn’t let that train of thought go any further.

From what he gleaned from
the mind of a cluster of gossiping students, he had just missed Claudia. She had hopped on a motorcycle with another young male vampire and rode off into the night about an hour ago.

Something about that young man and the way his eyes slid over Claudia’s form, even filtered through the minds of others, felt… off.

And so he concentrated and once he sensed them out in a secluded area of the woods a few miles away, he used his Cloud Gift to catch up.

He landed and made his way through the forest quietly, blocking his mind to avoid unintentionally broadcasting his thoughts.

Suddenly he heard Claudia scream in pain. She sounded frantic and terrified. Instinctively Lestat rushed in the direction of her voice.

How fortunate that had been, as he found her, sprawled out on the ground, leg twisted and obviously broken, eyes wide with terror as she stared up at the young man. He towered over her, spouting nonsense about manners, as he brought his hands down to unbuckle his belt and began to unzip his pants…

No!

Lestat was seized with rage so potent and incendiary that he forgot himself.

He simply moved.

Before he realized what he was doing, he had surged forward and punched a gaping hole clean through the little bastard’s torso.

He gasped and collapsed near the campfire. Without sparing a glance towards Claudia, Lestat grabbed him and viciously ripped at the skin of his neck with his fangs. With the tendons of his neck exposed, he twisted and tore off his wretched head with a sickening pop of bone and sinew.

He tossed it into the fire as his ruined body convulsed. Lestat threw that in too, like the trash it was and stood there watching it all burn in grim satisfaction.

A fitting end for one who dared to lay their filthy, degenerate hands on his fledgeling. His dau—

“L-Lestat?”

He turned to her, still lying in the grass, clothes splattered with her attacker’s blood. Her eyes welled with tears.

She looked so small.

He fought against it, but he still felt so oddly protective of Claudia. It was instinctive in a way that unsettled him.

He supposes he has the Vampire Bond to blame for it.

Lestat walked back to her and crouched down. He cupped her face in his hand for a moment, and she clutched at it, biting down harshly on her quivering lip.

As if it was every bit her instinct to seek comfort from him as it was his instinct to protect her.

Lestat quickly checked for any head wounds and scanned the rest of her body for more injuries before removing his hand from her grasp to inspect her leg.

Claudia hissed in pain as he turned it, as gingerly as he could. He could see the bone peaking out from her bloodied skin. He’d have to set it before it could heal.

“Do you want to come home?” he murmured, not looking her in the eye.

“W-What?”

“It can be just until you heal.”

“Louis won’t… He won’t let me leave if I do.”

“He would. He just wouldn’t be happy about it.”

“And you?”

“I would also let you leave, if that’s what you truly wanted. But we would need to talk first.”

She scoffed.

“You wanna talk? To me? Now that’s a miracle.”

“Yes, well, Louis requested it.”

Lestat looked up at her and saw her staring at him, expression pinched and unreadable.

“And you have no desire to talk to me on your own? Nothing you wanna say to me without Louis’ influence?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Hmm.”

Her amber colored eyes bored into him and he stared back.

She sighed and sat up, looking down at her leg.

“Let me see it,” she said quietly.

He did as she asked and moved his hands.

She stared down at it for a moment, before she suddenly grit her teeth and her little hands flew to grip her calf. Lestat barely had a second to register what she was doing before she snapped the bone back into place in one fluid movement, resetting it.

She yelped in pain and squeezed her eyes shut. After a moment, she took a steadying breath and looked at him, challenging.

Stubborn child.

“Find me some branches. I need to make a splint.”

He sighed and nodded.

Lestat returned to her moments later with an armful of branches. He removed the scarf he was wearing, one of his favorites, he thought mournfully, and set about tearing it into smaller strips to tie the splint to her leg.

Surprisingly, she let him do it without protest.

When he was done and felt satisfied with his work, she stood carefully. She wobbled slightly and his arms shot out to steady her.

Claudia looked up at him and clutched his hand once more.

“Thank you, Lestat,” she said softly.

“I can handle it from here.”

He watched as she limped around the campsite, collecting her things and rummaging through the young man’s items. She eventually found his wallet and the keys for his motorcycle.

She spat in the direction of his burning remains and hissed, fangs bared, before she sat down on the motorcycle. She turned the keys and smiled triumphantly as it rumbled to life.

In spite of everything, Lestat felt a rush of affection for her. His infant death.

“Don’t tell Louis,” she said, “I don’t want him to worry.”

He nodded.

She regarded him for a moment, worrying at her lip as if she wanted to say something else. Instead she nodded back and with that she rode off into the night.

Lestat stood there watching her for a long time, debating whether or not to follow her and bring her home, her protests be damned. He was her Maker after all, and it was his responsibility to protect her.

Cruel as he knew he had been, Lestat hadn’t lied: she was weak, fragile, built like a bird. But she was also clever and resourceful and strong-willed.

He fished a cigarette out of his pocket and lit the stub on the still crackling fire. In his melancholy he had been neglectful of so many of his duties.

He resolved that he’d have to do a better job of patrolling for other vampires and disposing of them if they dared to get too close. It would, of course, be easier to do if they were all under one roof, but he would manage.

He always did.

Chapter Text

Claudia came home on what was arguably one of the worst nights of Louis’ life.

And it had started off deceptively well. 

For once, he and Lestat’s nightly argument had been over something fairly silly and domestic that he can’t even remember.

It had left him feeling oddly nostalgic.

Shortly after, Grace had called and asked him meet her at their family mausoleum.

He had been so starved for the company of someone other than Lestat and so elated to see his sister that he forgot how tense their relationship had become over the years.

She was polite, but solemn and resolute as she spoke.

And sad.

So unbearably sad for him.

For what had become of their family, and for the slow and devastating decay of their relationship.

Grace had always been smart, and perceptive, especially when it came to Louis.

She had known from the start that there has been some mysterious but significant change in Louis.

She had been cautious, then wary but still made it clear, despite their mother’s protests, that he had an open invitation to their home and family gatherings.

But then her wariness turned into fear.

After he broke down the door of the home they once lived in with their parents and Paul. After he roughed up her husband and terrified her little girls.

Her words had done more to wound him than their Mama’s.

Not that they hadn’t been painful too, but by that point he had accepted that his Mama’s disapproval had warped into resentment, then outright hate, and there was nothing he could do to change it.

It took Grace a long time to reach out to him after that, which Louis understood.

She had her children to think of, after all.

Between the night he left an infant Benny crying and alone in a heap of blankets on the floor, and how badly he had frightened and almost physically harmed her girls, he had shown her it was no longer safe for him to be around them.

After a few months passed, Grace started to send him letters, and then she’d call him up every now and then, just to hear his voice, she’d say.

They’d keep their conversation light and cordial, but Louis clung to those moments like he was starving.

Unfortunately, there had been another rough patch after their tense stand-off at their Mama’s funeral.

Grace had voiced her disdain not only for his and Lestat’s decision to adopt Claudia, but for the control he still had over their family inheritance.

An inheritance he clearly didn’t need, not when he and his “White Daddy”, as she had spat, were living the good life while she and her family were struggling.

Louis, embittered by her words and emboldened by the presence of his husband and their daughter, had been uglier than he had intended to.

But true to his word, he had signed over the deed as well as the rest of their family property, to her.

It had been more than what she asked for.

And he knew Grace. Knew that she had loved him still and couldn’t shut him out after he had done what she asked.

She was stubborn too.

All of the Du Lac clan was, it seemed.

And so Grace resumed calling him every few months.

She’d ask after Lestat, and he’d ask after Levi.

She’d mention her kids every now and then, but made a point not to talk too much. And Louis tried his best not to ask too many questions, despite longing to know more about how his nieces and nephew were growing up.

In turn, Louis would sometimes ask Grace for advice since she had two daughters around Claudia’s age, but she kept her own questions and concerns about his daughter’s well-being to a minimum.

In another life, he knows Grace would’ve loved Claudia and that Claudia would’ve loved her right back. And he mourns that, just like he mourned the bonds he never got to have with his nieces and nephew.

He wished he had been able to do things like spoil the twins or teach them how to climb trees in their good Sunday dresses in secret like he did with Grace.

He wished he could’ve taught his nephew how to tap dance, like he and Paul used to, or taken him fishing.

He wishes they could’ve known Claudia and that they all could’ve grown up together.

But like so many of the things he wanted, it simply couldn’t be.

And so Louis had foolishly thought nothing of Grace’s late call or the location.

He had just been so damn happy to see her.

Looking all grown up and even more like their Mama as she aged.

God, he had missed her.

His Grace.

The little girl who had followed him everywhere and thought her big brother hung the moon and the stars. Who had always been his fiercest defender and the only one in his family he had ever felt he could talk to.

And he would never stop regretting how he missed out on so many moments in her life and in the lives of her children.

Perhaps this meeting would change things.

But he had been so very wrong.

Louis somehow managed to collect himself so that he could make it home, but he fell apart once more at the sight of how joyless and tomb-like it had become.

The only thing that had helped him weather the rejection and abandonment of his family was the comfort he took from knowing that he had his own to return to.

But now Claudia was gone and he and Lestat were barely speaking.

It was moment of weakness, but he was so wrecked that he cried out for Lestat and all but collapsed into his arms when he rushed to his side.

And how ugly it was for him to think of seeking comfort from the man he shared a life and home and child, the man he regarded as his husband, as a moment of weakness.

He refused to tell him everything Grace said, but let Lestat hold him as he wept, his large hands rubbing soothing circles on his back as they sat on the floor of their foyer.

Somehow he was able to get out that he now had a grave in the Du Lac family mausoleum.

That Grace, his last living blood relation, had finally done what he had been too weak to do and severed what remained of their familial bond.

Lestat was kind enough in that moment not to tell him that he knew this would happen, but he just knew arguments peppered with ‘I told you so’s were in their future.

After Louis had calmed down, he  untangled himself and withdrew from Lestat.

Lestat had looked hurt by that, the hopeful shine in his eyes dimming once again.

Louis ignored him and retreated to their bedroom and changed his clothes, then curled back up on the chaise to continue reading, all while refusing to acknowledge him any further.

Lestat had stalked upstairs after that and Louis heard the door to their bedroom slam.

He eventually returned, having changed out of his pajamas and silk dressing gown, in a simple but striking all black ensemble.

He rarely wore so much black.

It was no doubt a reflection of his current mood.

And Louis couldn’t help but notice that he looked good .

For a moment he let himself stare at his terribly attractive lover, taking in the soft golden waves of his hair, his large but elegant hands, his trim waist, his broad shoulders.

He was still so damn handsome, even with the grim expression on his face.

Even if he had surely put on those clothes, curled his hair and shined his shoes to look good for her and not for him.

Louis was suddenly overcome with a fierce longing for Lestat.

He wished they could just go back to the way things were before Claudia left. Or perhaps to how they were earlier than that.

Back in that dreamy, honeymoon-like stage Louis knew things had been turbulent, but it had been a simpler time. Lestat had been kinder and more patient then, too.

As Lestat set up the record player, he tore his eyes away.

Soft music Louis barely registered filled the room as Lestat began rummaging around.

Distantly he remembered that their argument from earlier was about a misplaced pair of boots. Louis had carelessly tossed them somewhere in a pile of junk and the box had been steadily buried under more junk.

He hoped Lestat never found the damn boots if it meant he had one less nice thing to parade around in for his mistress.

Louis was suddenly itching to start an argument. To make Lestat feel as awful as he did, but knew he was too drained for that kind of ugly, drawn out row. 

Perhaps they would get to that tomorrow night. 

And so Louis tried to distract himself from his fury by reading, but then his thoughts began to drift back to his last moments with Grace.

He found himself distracted by the memory of the pain and anger and sadness swirling in her dark brown eyes, the very same color his own had been in his human life.

Not so sooner than he realized he had read the same paragraph for the 10th time, Claudia arrived.

She quietly opened the front door and shuffled into the living room, hanging her head in shame.

Louis went to her immediately, and she stared up at him wide-eyed, bracing herself for his anger.

Instead, Louis gently reached out and folded her into his arms.

His daughter, his little girl, was finally, finally home.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

He felt Claudia shakily raise her arms and wrap them around him.

It was a moment Louis had imagined so many times over the years.

Y-You’re not mad at me? she asked, the sweet, melodic sound of her voice echoing through his mind like it hadn’t in years. 

No, no, baby girl. I missed you, I’m sorry I—

Abruptly, the music stopped.

They both flinched and slowly turned to look across the room.

Lestat stood there as they knew he would be, his stormy gray eyes bright with a cold, unsettling fury.

Chapter Text

Louis always thought that somehow, despite the lack of any blood relation, Claudia really did take after Lestat. 

In those first few years, he was glad for it and hoped it would help the two of them bond. And most of the time Louis found it endearing, but there were times when he thought it was unsettling.

Much like Lestat, she reveled in the hunt and had a penchant for dramatic kills that also mirrored Lestat, despite Louis’ efforts to teach her otherwise. 

Sometimes Louis would overhear the two gleefully comparing notes on their kills, with no remorse or respect for the lives they took, as if it was all a game.

Other times, he’d catch the chilly, calculating way she would size people up in public, much like Lestat when he entered a room. 

She would even speak to them in her deceptively polite manner that could turn sharp and critical at the drop of a hat, like Lestat had often done in business meetings Louis insisted on dragging him to. 

And when she sought out her prey, she was the picture of endearing innocence, utilizing her sweet face and youthful appearance to draw them in, much in the same way Lestat took advantage of his accent and good looks to disarm and lure in his prey.

He wasn’t sure if they were simply cut from the same cloth, or if they were behaving like normal vampires and he was the outlier.  Or perhaps it was possible for someone to take on some of their Maker’s personality traits, like some sort of vampiric imprinting, especially if they were turned so young. 

(The night Claudia was made, after she was fast asleep, Lestat had confessed that he knew very little of what to expect with such a young vampire. He could only assume that she would stop aging, frozen forever in her young body like they themselves were, but he had no idea how her mind and body would develop past that. They were in uncharted territory, but if Louis was sure that he wanted her, then that was it: she was their daughter now.)

The similarities between Claudia and Lestat had never been more striking than when they argued. 

The conversation on that particular night started out tense but deceptively civil, nothing like that last big argument they had before Claudia left.  And yet there was still undercurrent of bitterness and hurt seeping into the words they aimed at each other with frightening precision. 

As if they both knew exactly what to say to pierce each other’s armor and inflict the greatest amount of damage.

But then the niceties were gone and they were at each other’s throats once more. Louis thinks of it as their ugliest and most emotional argument. It was as if years of bottled up anger and pain had finally been unleashed in a swirling torrent that could no longer be contained.

And it was foolish, Louis knows this, but there was a part of him that wondered if this could end up being a good thing.

The Claudia from before had a boundless amount of energy and an insatiable curiosity. She was noise and chaos and unbridled joy, feeling everything with the intensity only a teenage girl on the cusp of puberty could. This Claudia looked the same, but she was older.

She had an air of calm, maturity and poise about her that didn’t exist before. She was reserved, anger  brought down to a simmer instead of an instant, raging fire.

And she had apologized.

For his part, Louis didn’t fucking care. 

She could’ve brought back hundreds of souvenirs and left a trail of mangled corpses to their doorstep this time and he’d still welcome her with open arms. 

She was his daughter. 

How could he not? 

And as pissed off as Lestat had been by that whole affair, he knew he’d gotten over it as well. 

Sure, he’d gleefully use it as ammunition, but with careful application of their Mind Gifts, a little bribery and the two making a point to lay low for a few years, the police had moved on.

”…The vampires out there are vicious,” Lestat sneered, “But you already know that… don’t you?”

Lestat loomed over Claudia, eyebrows raised expectantly.

Her eyes widened and she momentarily lost control of her finely tuned ability of blocking her mind.

Louis saw flashes of… something. 

Of endless rows of books and crowds of young people. 

Of dark, slicked back hair, fangs, unnaturally bright eyes and a leather jacket. 

Of headlights, of trees flickering by in a moonlit forest, of fire, of blood and gore and her ice cold terror…

Suddenly her mind shuttered once more and the visions were lost to him before he could even piece them together. 

He didn’t know what this was, but Claudia was reliving some terrible memory.

Before he knew what he was doing, Louis shouted.

“Stop!”

Lestat’s head snapped to look at him. He looked surprised, red-rimmed eyes wide and frantic.

He went to him, and gripped at the fabric of Louis’ blue cardigan, a note of desperation in his voice unlike anything Louis had ever heard. 

He was scared. 

Lestat de Lioncourt was well and truly terrified. 

Terrified at the thought of Louis abandoning him. 

His foolish, yearning, romantic heart fluttered at that, but there was also that ugly part of Louis that thrilled at the thought of having even the tiniest bit of power over Lestat.

“Are you gonna leave me, then? To go with her? To protect her? Even if you were at the height of your power, Louis, you couldn’t. I couldn’t. You think I’m cruel? They are nightmares made flesh.”

“Then why not tell us that!” Claudia shouted from over Louis’ shoulder, “Why keep us in the dark?”

“For your own good!” 

He moved to stalk over to her, but Louis caught him, firmly pressing his hand to his chest.

“Lestat, just stop! I am not leaving you!”

Lestat froze, staring back at him wide-eyed. Louis took the opportunity to cup his face with his other hand, forcing him to look him in the eyes.

“Lestat. Calm down. Please. Can you do that for me?”

If Louis could just get him to calm down, maybe they could salvage this conversation. For all the ugliness, there was a shocking amount of honesty in their words.

And he had almost managed it, from the way the blond started to melt at his words. But somehow the words “calm down” had the opposite effect and only enraged him more.

“No—No!” he snarled, jerking away.

“You always cast me as the villain!” 

“And you revel in it!” Claudia yelled. “You wear it like a badge of pride. Don’t pretend! You enjoy it!”

“Or perhaps I was simply trying to shield my family from the harsh realities of our kind!”

“Please, you keep us ignorant so we have no choice but to depend on you!”

“Claudia!”

“Well, you left!” Lestat challenged.

She laughed, incredulously.

“Why do you even care, Lestat? You didn’t want me!”

“What about Louis, huh? Because you didn’t just leave me—”

“Oh, go to hell! You probably loved not havin’ to share him with me—!”

“—You left him!”

“But I came back!”

“Yes, after years you came back for him, of course, but how long until you leave again?”

“That’s not—!”

“I am the one who stayed with him all these years.”

He gripped Louis’ hand, still pressed against his chest, and turned to look at him. 

His expression was pained.

“Ignored. Resented… Living in squalor and despair and off of the meager scraps of his affection…”

He smiled bitterly and Louis felt sick to his stomach.

Lestat had been far crueler throughout all of their years together, but Louis was aware of how much he had hurt Lestat these past few years with his coldness, sharp words, and disinterest. He was a creature who thrived off of love and attention. To go for so long without, and from the one he craved it from the most, was a special kind of torture for him.

Perhaps it could’ve been different if Lestat had at least pretended to care about Claudia’s absence.

The night Claudia ran away Lestat immediately suggested that they relocate and when that didn’t work, dismantle her room, and Louis had been furious. 

Lestat wasn’t going to try to fix things. 

He wasn’t going to bother with looking for their daughter. 

Their daughter.

Theirs.

He didn’t want them to be a family. 

Clearly those precious years spent together hadn’t been as important to him as they had been to Louis. They had been the equivalent of a game, a fun little diversion until he, as Claudia had said, grew bored of them. Louis, the boring housewife Lestat had slowly molded him into, and Claudia the mistake. 

It was as if he expected Louis to get over her absence and for things to go back to how they were before their daughter. 

Their daughter.

But why should Lestat get to continue on enjoying life and indulging in all its pleasures while Louis’ heart ached? 

Why should he get to carry on without a care in the world? 

Why should he get to keep stepping out on him again and again with that damn woman and still come home to him? 

And all while Louis was sinking further and further into a pit of despair. All while their child, their beautiful, clever, fragile child, was out there all alone in the world? 

It had been so damn cathartic to watch him unravel under the weight of Louis’ resentment. To know that Lestat had, as always, gotten what he wanted, but couldn’t enjoy it.

Louis had hated himself for how he enjoyed Lestat’s misery but it was the only thing that gave him a reprieve from his own despair. The sick, thrilling satisfaction, had slowly become the only thing that could make him feel alive.

“I did all of that because I love him,” Lestat continued, voice thick with emotion.

“I’d do anything for Louis. And what did you do? You abandoned him. You have no idea how deeply you hurt him. And now you expect me to forget that and welcome you back with open arms?!”

“I don’t expect that any more than I expect you to apologize to me!”

A high, hysterical laugh burst out of Lestat.

“This nonsense again?”

“Lestat—”

“That was discipline, dear. A foreign concept in this household, I know,” he bit out, staring pointedly at Louis.

“You were my fledgling, my child, and I was teaching you, disciplining you, as a Maker, as parent should.”

“And I’m not sayin’ you were wrong, because you weren’t okay? I’ve had time to think about it. I lost my head and put us all in danger. It’s just… the way you chose to handle it.”

Wringing her hands, she took at step towards Lestat, pleading.

“Can you just try for a moment? Please? Please, please, please just try. Just try to put yourself in my shoes.”

Lestat let go of Louis’ hand and gestured at her to continue.

“Try to imagine how it would feel to accidentally kill your first love. To get so caught up in love and desire that you forget yourself and make a horrible mistake. The kind you’d give anything to take back. The kind you’ll look back on and regret the rest of your life. And then, you go to your parents, the only ones who would understand, askin’ for help, only to be met with cruelty.”

“You were frantic, hysterical. You wouldn’t have listened. And had I decided to humor you and try, the outcome would’ve been the same and you would’ve lashed out at me still.”

“Maybe,” she sniffled, “But I was a teenager, that’s just how they are. And you were the adult. Why did you choose to, at that exact moment, be so cruel to me? Why did you have to mock me?”

Lestat looked down, avoiding her gaze, but said nothing.

During their countless arguments in the days after, Louis had also demanded an explanation for his cruelty that night.

It was absurd, but Lestat had only seemed offended. He saw it as an attack on his parenting of a rebellious teenager instead of considering said teenager’s feelings. He always took Claudia’s behavior so personally, as if she was the only teenage girl to have ever acted out or disobeyed her parents.

Lestat had insisted that they had been far too easy on Claudia.  

She was past 18, which meant she wasn’t a child anymore, and she needed to take responsibility for her actions. But she was still a very young vampire. 

She needed to learn discipline. She needed to learn discretion and how plan out her kills. She needed to learn to blend in and avoid drawing attention to herself. She needed to know how to control herself and not to get wrapped up in human entanglements.

Like you, Louis, went unspoken.

Claudia took a deep, shuddering breath.

“I just… couldn’t believe it. That the same man who liked to put on little impromptu shows with funny makeshift costumes just to make me laugh was doin’ this. The same man that liked to dance with me in the courtyard and bring home little gifts for me just because. I-I didn’t understand.”

Her sweet face contorted in a confusion, as if she still didn’t understand it. 

“Lestat… I thought, up to that moment, that despite how crotchety you could get, that underneath it all, there was a part of you that l-loved me. Yes, I needed to learn a lesson, but until that night, I never would’ve imagined you treatin’ me like that. Makin’ me carry the body of the boy I loved to that incinerator, like that sweet, beautiful boy was trash. Makin’ me light it up and forcin’ me to watch him burn up until he was nothin’ but ash and charred bones. That’s what I think truly broke me…”

She jabbed a delicate finger at him, eyes blazing.

“It was heartless and you know it! If you say you’re not as vicious as the others, then you must.”

He had the grace to at least look remorseful at her words.

“You didn’t have to do that to me, Uncle Les,” she whispered.

“And you never apologized to me for it. I think a part of me wanted you to, a part of me still wants you to. Because that would at least mean that you cared enough about me to feel sorry. But you didn’t and you won’t. Louis’ the only one aside from my Mama, maybe, who knows, that ever wanted me. You can’t imagine how painful that is. To always feel like a burden, to always feel unwanted, like you’re always in the way…”

He stared at his boot covered feet for a long moment.

“I understand it more than you know,” he said quietly. 

“Then why? Why act as if you don’t?”

“I don’t know!”

She glared at him, blood tears streaking down her face.

“I don’t even think I believe you,” she hissed.

“This is just more of your lies! Your secrets! Your deceit!” 

“Claudia, stop!”

Louis stepped in front of her and laid his hands on her shoulders. His grip was gentle, but firm in a way that brokered no argument.

“Louis—“

“Just give us a minute okay? Wash your face, go to your room, put your stuff down, yeah?”

“But I’m not—“

“You’re at least going to take a load off and sleep here today, alright?”

“But—“

“Claudia.”

“Fine…”

She pushed past him and up the stairs, but hesitated until Louis flashed her a reassuring smile.

“Go on, Little Miss. We’ll be fine.”

She nodded warily and trudged away.

***

At the sound of her bathroom door clicking shut, Louis took a deep breath to fortify himself. 

Somehow Claudia’s presence made him feel more lively than he had in years. Like the life he had longed for these past seven years with his daughter and his love, with his family, was within his grasp. 

He couldn’t let either of them go, but what he could do was try to do his part to mend their relationship. 

He had to. 

They were all he had.

Lestat had sat down heavily in a nearby dining chair, arms tightly wrapped around himself. He eyes were locked on the faded pattern of the rug.

“Lestat,” he started, approaching him slowly.

When he didn’t move, Louis sat down beside him carefully. 

“You know… We did agree all those years ago that there would be no secrets.”

“That is not a simple request, Louis.”

“Maybe, but it could be. Might be cathartic even.”

“So you expect me to just cut open my heart and let all the pain and torment of my past bleed out for your amusement?”

“Lestat, there ain’t a damn thing about that that would be.”

“And what of you then?” he challenged, “Would you suddenly share what goes on in that head of yours?”

“I… would. I’d want to… If I felt like I could.”

Lestat frowned, confusion and irritation flickering across his face.

“What could you possibly mean by that?”

“That it’s hard to talk to you, Lestat! You get so frustrated that I don’t talk about every damn thing I think and feel, but have you ever considered why?”

“Fine, Louis, I’ll bite: Why?”

He winced and looked away. This was the part of many similar conversations in the past that would devolve into arguing. 

He didn’t like to talk any more than Lestat did, but that wasn’t right. Maybe they shouldn’t know everything about each other, but… Two people in love, two people that chose each other, that knew each other’s bodies better than their own, that built a life together and raised a child? 

People like that just shouldn’t have mountains of secrets and distrust between them. 

Even if they don’t tell each other every tiny detail of their lives or every single thought that crosses their mind, they should still feel so safe and at ease with each other that they could. 

They had a version of that in the beginning, though Louis knows now that it was largely due to Lestat’s mind gift.

In it’s absence, he still felt a emotional connection to Lestat that was just as profound as their physical one. And so he hadn’t been too concerned, thinking that bond would only deepen. Distantly, he remembers their frequent blood sharing in those early years, especially when they made love.

It seemed like the barrier between Maker and Fledgling would crumble and they could see and feel everything in the blood. 

The blood doesn’t lie, Lestat had told him once.

Back then, Lestat had been far more compassionate and didn’t stray, and Louis hadn’t felt as guarded around him or insecure.

Over the years he had given up on ever experiencing that kind of closeness again, but that’s the kind of love Louis wanted. The kind of love he wanted with Lestat. And maybe it wasn’t so impossible for them, even now.

It would be painful, it would be hard, but maybe, just maybe, they could heal and work towards that. It was going to take all his strength, but Louis had to start now, and that meant picking at countless old wounds.

But he had to try.

“That’s… just how I am,” he said haltingly. 

“How I was raised. But… I also don’t want you to dismiss how I feel and act like I’m foolish. I mean, yes, you’ve got more years on me and know more, but you’re not exactly forthcoming with that knowledge. I feel like I have to learn on my own, and I know she feels the same.”

Lestat sighed.

“I… speak from experience, Louis. My… turning, was not something I chose. And it was not gentle. I didn’t want it. Not any part of it. It was a… violation.”

He hunched over, faced twisted in pain as tears began fall. He looked so impossibly and frighteningly small. 

And Louis felt sick as the implication behind his words began to sink in. 

“I was given no guidance,” he continued, “I was left alone, to figure out how to live with this Dark Gift. You think I didn’t try to feed from animals at first? Or criminals? I know now that I should’ve been more patient but I was trying to prevent you from struggling like that. And the pit of self-loathing you’d fall into when you’d inevitably give it up. Because such a thing isn’t sustainable for an eternity, Louis. And… I was frustrated, perhaps jealous even.”

“Jealous? Of what?”

“Of your determination. Of you strength of will. Of your conviction and morality. I tried to do the same as you did, but I didn’t last nearly as long as you have, Louis. And your questioning, your moral quandaries? They force me to think about all those I’ve killed, for my own survival, yes, like any other living thing, but you don’t see it that way. But I simply cannot do that Louis. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. So instead I revel in it. That’s the only way I can live.”

“I… think I understand. But all that you’ve been through? I know this is only the tip of the iceberg here, but for you to still be here? It’s admirable. You’re strong, Lestat.”

Louis’ words hung in the air for a moment, and the tense line of Lestat’s shoulders began to relax. 

“You… still didn’t answer the question, Louis,” he said, still refusing to look at him. 

“Not… fully. I can tell. I can always tell when you’re holding back.”

He was too damn perceptive when he wanted to be. But it was fine, Louis could admit this. He could reopen this wound if it meant it would heal up right this time.

“Because… I-I don’t want you to laugh at me again.”

He meant to say it plainly, but the memory unmoored him and he suddenly felt as anxious and embarrassed as he did back then. The tremor in his voice betrayed his unease.

The blond’s head snapped up and he stared at Louis. He glanced at him and saw a horrified expression on his face. A dawning realization that was about a decade too late. 

No. Not too late. Louis had to believe that. 

“Then it’s… my fault,” Lestat murmured, eyes wide in shock.

Louis couldn’t summon the energy to offer any empty reassurances and said nothing.

“It is. That year when you stopped feeding on humans, when I met… her. That’s when things changed. You tried to get me to understand and came to me for help. For guidance. For reassurance. And instead I mocked you. Just like I did with Claudia. And then you…”

His eyes welled up with tears, and he rubbed them away inelegantly, smearing blood across his face. 

“You asked me, ‘Aren’t I enough?’, and what did I do? It’s as you said, I laughed at you and mocked your feelings.”

He shook his head, smiling bitterly.

“No wonder you closed yourself off from me. I wanted you to share your heart with me, while giving you every reason not to.”

Louis sighed and looked away.

“Could we try to do better? For ourselves and each other? And Claudia? I don’t know, but we have to try. Baby look, you were right: we can’t go on like this.”

“Louis… I’m not sure that I can change,” his voice was uncharacteristically timid. 

“You can,” Louis insisted. 

“If anyone can do it, you can. I have to believe that. And wouldn’t it be boring to spend an eternity stuck in a rut like that?”

The blond chuckled at that.

“Yes, it would be quite boring. I always thought of it as loosing a part of yourself, so I clung to the image of who I once was. But time has warped that image. Clearly I am not the same man. I’m nothing more than a poor imitation. I have changed despite my best efforts. I think I’ve become worse.”

Louis hesitantly laid his hand on his shoulder. 

“Then try something for me, mon cher: try to change for the better.”

That old endearment, one that neither had uttered for years, stunned Lestat back into silence. 

“I’m not saying, stop feeding on humans, but I’m saying maybe just… try not to kill as often, and when you do, don’t be so needlessly cruel. Don’t be so controlling and withholding with me and our girl. Try to talk, if you’re speaking from experience, instead of ignoring our feelings and our questioning. We’re not fools and we’re not your enemies. We’re your family. Your companions. It’s supposed to be us against the world, right?”

“Yes.”

“Even Claudia, she’s our daughter, Lestat. I-I know I forced your hand. I know that you didn’t choose her. That you didn’t want her. But she’s here now and she’s a part of this family. If you’re just trying to protect her, tell her that. Explain why you did what you did all those years ago. Maybe if you’d answer some of her questions about our kind… or if you can’t, just tell her why.“

“You don’t know what you’re asking of me, Louis.”

“Then tell me! I’m serious Lestat, if you can’t tell us these things then at least tell us why!”

“Because… I was sworn to secrecy. I made a vow. I was entrusted with secrets that I cannot divulge. For my own sake, and now yours.”

“By who?”

“There are… others. Much older and far stronger than myself. And there are even more ancient ones than those. If I ever invoked their wrath, I couldn’t protect you or her, Louis.”

Fear overtook him at the thought of vampires stronger than Lestat. He would’ve called him out, told him he was bluffing, but he knows Lestat. The man reveled in his strength and was far too proud to admit when someone was stronger than him unless it was the absolute truth. An undeniable fact that even he couldn’t ignore.

“Claudia herself would be reason enough for their ire.”

Louis frowned.

“I don’t understand. Why? She’s not bothering anyone.”

“Her very existence is a violation of the laws that govern our kind.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that an adolescent vampire, one turned before maturing to adulthood, is forbidden. Should anyone discover her existence, the retribution against me but more importantly her, would be swift and absolute.”

And there it was. Louis finally had an answer, or at least part of it.

“…So that’s why you don’t want to go to Europe and don’t want either of us going alone either…”

“I can’t protect you there. They are far crueler and far stronger than you can even comprehend. Here at least in America, I know there are fewer, and that I am one of, if not the strongest.”

“How do you figure that?”

“Louis… I am, stronger than I’ve led you to believe. But I did it so that you wouldn’t be afraid of me. I hid the full extent of my power so that you wouldn’t feel weak.”

“But I am,” Louis said quietly.

“At that is largely by choice. Your diet had truly stunted your growth. I’ve been waiting for years to see what abilities you would manifest, but so far there has been nothing of note. Who knows how long it will take, or if you’ll ever develop a gift of your own. That is a tragedy to me. I don’t want you to feel weak, Louis. I want you to feel strong.”

“I… didn’t know that.”

“Yes, because I didn’t tell you. But would that have changed your mind?”

“Maybe? I-I don’t know. Maybe if I knew what I’d end up with. If it would be worth it.”

The blond shook his head, fondly exasperated. 

“That’s not how it works, Louis. No vampire knows what gifts they will develop. And some abilities surface as you advance in age. The older you are the stronger you are.”

“You’re nearly 200…”

“Yes, but I’m not—“

“What abilities do you have?”

The two froze and looked up to see Claudia standing at the top of the stairs once more. She had changed into a nightgown and robe, with her face scrubbed clean and hair pulled back into a low ponytail.

“Claudia!” Louis scolded, “What did I say?”

She glanced at him, unimpressed.

“I’m 25, Daddy Lou,” she said coolly as she descended. “I know I still look it, but I’m not a little girl anymore. Don’t exactly

have control over that though, remember?”

At that Louis looked away guiltily. She was right. He didn’t know what to say.

Lestat chuckled beside him.

“So you heard all that, huh?”

She nodded.

“I’m not as strong as you, so I’ve been working on sharpening my senses the past few years. I can hear from pretty damn far away now. And I’ve gotten better at hiding myself from other vampires.”

“Seems you have a natural talent,” Lestat said. 

Louis detected a note of pride in his voice.  

“You always did find a way to evade me when I tried looking for you.”

Louis looked back and forth between them. 

“You had been looking for her too all this time? And you? You were hiding all along?”

“Lestat, answer the question.”

“Claudia! Now just wait a damn minute—“

“The Cloud Gift.”

Louis froze and turned back to Lestat, barely registering the blur that flickered past him and blew several stack of newspaper off the dining table. 

“And what is that?” Claudia demanded, standing before him.

“What do you think?”

“Something to do with…”

Her eyes widened and she laughed incredulously.

“Lestat de Lioncourt, you mean to tell me that all this time you’ve been able to fuckin’ fly?”

Lestat said nothing, and simply held her gaze. 

“I don’t believe it.”

“Shall I show you then?”

Claudia looked hesitant once more. She took a step back to stand by Louis and squared her shoulders.

“Yes,” she said, chin high and amber eyes blazing, “Show me.”

***

They relocated to the courtyard, Claudia firmly grasping Louis’ hand as Lestat stood before them. 

Louis could’ve wept at the feeling of her delicate hand in his once more. 

His daughter’s hand. 

She was home.

”Well?” Claudia said expectantly. “I know you like to show off so here’s your chance. Get on with it.”

Lestat huffed a laugh and nodded, “Of course.”

His eyes flicked over to Louis and he looked hesitant for a moment.

But then he closed his eyes and slowly began to rise until his feet left the ground and he floated into the air, his dark clothes blending into the night sky. 

Claudia gasped beside him and gripped his hand even harder.

Louis was in shock.

Lestat could fly. 

He hadn’t been lying. But he had been hiding this. 

A feeling of dread washed over Louis and his legs felt unsteady.

After all this time, he thought he had known Lestat, and better than anyone else in the world, but now he knows that couldn’t possibly be true. 

What else had Lestat been hiding from him?

They watched him rise higher and higher, golden hair fanning out in the breeze like a halo, until he was floating several feet above their rooftop.

He opened his eyes and finally met Louis’, looking oddly contrite instead of smug and victorious like he had been expecting. 

Lestat drifted elegantly back down to the courtyard and landed softly on the ground.

”There,” he said, tersely, “Are you happy, Claudia?”

It was then that a fractured memory began to resurface. Louis suddenly felt lightheaded.

“You’ve done this before… I just tried to bury the memory. Or maybe you did? I-I don’t…”

Lestat studied him for a moment, then shrugged.

“Well, you were also quite drunk. And in denial. About a lot that transpired that night.”

Louis flushed and glared at him.

“When was this?”

“Way before you. It was the first time Louis and I—“

“Okay, Lestat! Thank you, that’s enough.”

Claudia scrunched her face up, understanding.

“Say no more, I don’t want to imagine my damn parents like that. Who on earth would?”

Her words hung in the air and they both stared at her.

“…Parents?” Louis repeated, cautious but hopeful.

“I guess? I mean, I’m not a child so I’m not sure that fits anymore...”

“Then what?”

“Sister? I-I’ve been thinking about it. Maybe I can just be a little sister. For both of you.”

“Are you sure?”

“No,” she huffed, “But we’re going to try it. And you’re not gonna treat me like a child. If you do, then I swear I’m out the door.”

They both nodded in agreement.

Satisfied, Claudia addressed Lestat once more. 

“Can I fly?”

“No, at least not now. The abilities the Dark Gift can bestow vary. In general, such abilities only manifest after centuries. But drinking the blood of a powerful elder vampire who does have this gift can accelerate it.”

“Like you?”

He nodded once more.

“Like me.”

“So in theory, one day I could, but we won’t know until then?”

“Yes, but as with many other things, your stunted growth and adolescent body may work against that.”

“Always does, doesn’t it?” she said, smiling bitterly.

“Claudia…”

Louis squeezed Claudia’s hand in a comforting gesture, but she pulled it away, continuing to speak to Lestat.

“What others are there?”

“Well, there’s the Mind Gift, but you know that. All vampires start out with that gift. As a vampire ages, that ability can grow stronger and branch out into other skills.”

“Like?”

“Mind control. Telekinesis. Hypnosis. Creating illusions. The erasure of memory. Constructing and implanting new ones.”

“So you know a lot about this. I’d like to hear everything you know.”

”That… will take a while.”

“Hmm. Well, the night is young, and by the looks of it, ya’ll didn’t have any plans. I suggest we get comfortable and you tell me and Louis aaaall about the rest.”