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Chapter Text

Some people are just born rotten; from the moment they take their first breath, they are already destined to be a terrible person. Shen Jiu always knew she was one of these people, a wicked heart had resided in her chest for as long as she could remember; but where she came from it was a blessing, you needed to be cruel to survive those conditions.

That was a lesson all the children owned by the slave traders had learned one way or another; caring about other people only ended badly, either for yourself or for someone else.

As Shen Jiu stood with her back straight in front of the Quis, she realized that it wasn’t just a bunch of horseshit, it was the truth. Yue Qi had cared too much for dead weight, and how did it end?

It ended with Shen Jiu getting the short end of the stick; the brat that Qi-ge saved sold her out for killing Young Master Qiu’s horse, which ended up with her being taken to a place worse than hell.

Kindness got people like Shen Jiu nowhere, and she believes her mantra reigns tried and true, just see where Qi-ge's righteousness got her.

Qiu Jianluo bought her and one other slave from Shen Jiu’s “batch”, Wen Bai, and brought them to his family’s estate. After being beaten and then locked up for a few days, they were scrubbed and boiled until their skin nearly bled and blistered, then Shen Jiu and Wen Bai were brought to Qiu Jianluo’s study.

The servants that were tasked with bringing them there simply pushed them down to the floor, making them kneel by their young master’s feet.

Winning the fight against self-preservation, Shen Jiu lifted her head to scowl defiantly at him.

If Shen Jiu didn’t know better, she’d say that Qiu Jianluo was good-looking; he had every feature you’d desire as a young master, and when he dressed in expensive and beautiful garments you could almost not guess how vile he really was underneath that shiny exterior.

But Shen Jiu knew better, she knew far too well of the kind of man Qiu Jianluo was. A youth who was used to getting his way, and who would stop at nothing to get what he wanted.

Qiu Jianluo completely ignored his other purchase, and instead circled around Shen Jiu like a vulture inspecting a cadaver before crouching in front of her and roughly pulling her chin up to face him properly.

“It’s a true shame someone like you were blessed with a face like this,” Young Master Qiu remarked with a disgusting smile tugging on his lips as he inspected her face from side to side. “It’s a true shame indeed..”

Shen Jiu didn’t shiver at his words no matter how much her body wanted to; she knew what kind of intentions were most likely hidden underneath, but she was determined to not show weakness in front of anyone, and especially not him— so she just continued to glare.

Apparently that wasn’t the right reaction; Qiu Jianluo got up on his feet and then launched a hard kick to Shen Jiu’s ribs. To the young master’s surprise, his new little plaything took each and every kick and slap he threw at her; not once did she fight back or cry.

It ignited the sick desire to do more and more until he finally found what could break her.

Qiu Jianluo pulled Shen Jiu up by her hair and smiled sardonically when he saw the two streams of red dripping from her nose. “You really are—”

He was interrupted by the sound of someone knocking on the door to the study. Both of them froze and Qiu Jianluo immediately threw Shen Jiu to the floor. During the whole ordeal, Wen Bai simply kept kneeling on the floor, not even doing as much as shoot a glance at the beaten Shen Jiu— smart, caring for people just ended badly.

“Gege? Gege, are you in here?” A young girl’s cheerful voice called from outside the study.

“Clean yourself! If you say one wrong thing, you’re dead!” Qiu Jianluo hissed as he grabbed and threw water from a vase right at Shen Jiu’s face.

Shen Jiu fought with her sense of self-preservation again, but this time self-preservation won; she did not want to die just yet. She scrubbed the dust off her face with the water she’d been “provided” and wiped away the blood from her face.

Young Master Qiu glared at Shen Jiu over his shoulder, after deciding she looked good enough he finally opened the door and let what Shen Jiu assumed must have been the little miss of the household into the room.

She looked to be around Shen Jiu’s age, maybe a year or two younger; she was wearing a beautiful light pink and purple brocade dress, and she wore a mass amount of colorful ribbons and accessories in her hair. Young Miss Qiu looked every bit of the spoilt little golden princess of the household she most definitely was.

Young Master Qiu’s face softened as he laid eyes on his sister and he placed a gentle hand on her head. “For what reason did Tang-er come here?” he asked, the sweetness lacing his voice was enough to make Shen Jiu sick all the way to her stomach.

“I heard gege purchased someone, so I wanted to see them,” she exclaimed happily; how nice it must be to be so naive. While giggling, Qiu Haitang pulled away from her brother’s hand and instead moved so she could see the two other people in the room.

Just like her brother, Qiu Haitang completely ignored Wen Bai and went straight for Shen Jiu instead, her face all smiles. If only she knew what her brother’s purchase really entailed. The pure young miss pulled Shen Jiu up on her feet and asked, “Are you Xiao Jiu?”

Shen Jiu didn’t answer, she instead just looked to the side and accidentally met Qiu Jianluo’s eyes. The young master’s eyes flashed with something dangerous as he glared at Shen Jiu.

“Xiao Jiu is a bit shy and doesn’t like to talk a lot, Tang-er,” Qiu Jianluo said with a smile; the way he said Xiao Jiu made Shen Jiu want to rip her hair out and scream, it sounded wrong, disgusting even.

Qiu Haitang smiled sweetly and said, “Why are you shy? Can’t you say something to me?”

Shen Jiu still didn’t answer, but she couldn’t help how her face and ears reddened at how sweet and soft Little Miss Qiu’s voice sounded when she spoke to Shen Jiu. It would be too cruel, too easy to spit venom at someone as innocent as this little miss.

Even though she didn’t receive a response, Qiu Haitang just giggled again and took Shen Jiu’s hand in hers. “Gege, I get why you purchased her, she’s so much fun, I like her!”

Qiu Jianluo and Shen Jiu’s gazes were still locked, his scowl slowly turned into a predatory grin, it was something that belonged on a wild beast rather than a young man. “Yes, I rather like her too,” he said smoothly.

At the tone of how he said the word “like”, Shen Jiu’s stomach turned, her body turned stiffer than a board, and she suppressed the urge to violently shiver again.

Some people are just born rotten, and in the world Shen Jiu and Yue Qi lived in, it’s best to look out for yourself rather than waste energy helping other people; your own survival is the priority, and Shen Jiu took to this mindset like a fish takes to water.

But Qi-ge had never understood it, he didn’t want to accept that this was the brutal truth of their world. He was too soft-hearted for a life like theirs; that’s why he jumped at the chance to escape when he had it.

Shen Jiu’s stupid Qi-ge had tried to rescue her, but the place she was locked in had too many locks, and she lied and said her legs had been broken by the Qius so he’d just leave.

Yue Qi asked for forgiveness, saying her fate was his fault. Shen Jiu agreed, everything was his fault, his soft-heartedness and stubbornness got Shen Jiu stuck in hell, but she still couldn’t bring herself to hate him.

She imagined he’d try to free her despite her protests, and then he’d get captured and would probably be sent back to the traders, or just be killed.

But to her surprise, her Qi-ge said goodbye. He said he’d be back for her as soon as he’d joined a sect, and that he would become a great cultivator.

“What a naive idiot you are,” Shen Jiu told him. Such high ambitions were fruitless for people like them; she should’ve known that her Qi-ge was too stubborn to listen, and that he was too good to fail.

Yue Qi promised that he would repay her loyalty, he promised that he would come back for her, he promised that he would save her.

And foolishly so, she believed him.

Some people were just born rotten, yes. But some people, people like Yue Qi, were born too good, and their good hearts always led to the downfall of rotten people like Shen Jiu.

A day after Yue Qi’s escape, Shen Jiu was brought to Qiu Jianluo’s study again. His ownership of her was cemented in the form of a brand burned into her skin— a brand engraved with the name Qiu.

“Life” in the Qiu household was worse than any kind of hell you could possibly imagine. Shen Jiu was made into Qiu Haitang’s personal servant, her own little plaything she could do whatever she wanted with, and Shen Jiu was not permitted to disagree.

The Qius might say she was a servant, but the Qiu brand burned on the skin on her back proved otherwise; Shen Jiu was not simply a person who had been hired by the household and could leave whenever she wanted, she was property, she was owned by them.

Shen Jiu hated every second she spent in the Qiu household, but she was fueled by the childish hope that one day Yue Qi would come back to rescue her, take her away from that horrible place and bring her back to the cultivation sect he’d found.

Foolish hope, but it fueled her enough to continue.

The only solace in the Qiu household was little miss Qiu Haitang, her presence was the only thing that could keep Qiu Jianluo’s perverse and violent nature at bay. Qiu Haitang was innocent, naive, and foolish— but she was also kind and sweet, and Shen Jiu found herself developing a soft spot for the girl, not just for how she warded away the beatings.

Over the next two years, Qiu Jianluo’s obsession with “his Xiao Jiu” grew past the point of madness; he’d always beat her to a pulp and tell her how much of a waste her face was on a dirty slave like her.

But afterwards he’d demand she quietly sit on his lap and let him run his fingers through her hair and his hands down her thighs.

Every time he touched Shen Jiu’s skin it felt like she was being branded all over again; his touch burned, it made her want to peel her skin off every time he did it— scrub herself clean of his filth and cut off every one of her limbs that he’d ever laid a single finger on.

When Shen Jiu had just turned fourteen, Master and Madam Qiu died tragically of illness, and Qiu Jianluo was made head of the household. The first thing he did as the new Master Qiu was to bethrothe himself to Shen Jiu, and bethrothe his sister to the spineless Wen Bai.

The disgusting Master Qiu couldn’t bear the thought of his precious little sister being tainted by the outside world, so having her marry one of their household’s slaves that his Tang-er was a little fond of was a perfect way to ensure her staying with him.

And his own engagement? Well, Qiu Jianluo wanted to make sure Shen Jiu was his in every way she could be. He was a man who wasn’t too fond of the idea of his plaything daring to look at someone else, and his Tang-er adored Shen Jiu, so it was also yet another thing that would keep his darling sister tied to their household.

When Shen Jiu was informed of her new place as Qiu Jianluo’s fiancée she nearly spat blood right in his face. The idea of him owning her in that way made her sick to her core, inside her rotten heart she screamed herself hoarse, she was disgusted, he was revolting.

Now that Shen Jiu was his fiancée, Qiu Jianluo made sure to remind her every day of how she’d soon belong to him, how she’d soon be his in every way, shape, and form. But even though she had his “affections” he showed no signs of stopping the beatings, of course he didn’t, he was rotten through and through.

His touch turned from burning to scorching, he was dirty, disgusting; she scrubbed herself to the point of nearly peeling away a layer of skin every time she bathed.

At night she still foolishly believed in Yue Qi’s promise; he’d be back soon, he’d surely come and save her soon, it was only a matter of time.

But with each day that went by without her Qi-ge returning, her hope slowly but surely started to die out, the sizable flame she’d harbored at twelve had become less than a spark at fifteen. But a spark is a spark no matter its size. Foolishly, she still hoped.

(Her adult self would laugh herself to tears at how stupid she used to be; good people don’t come back for rotten people, it was just the way the world worked.)

“Xiao Jiu! Xiao Jiu! Look at this hairpin, isn’t it lovely?” Qiu Haitang’s sweet voice called from a few zhang away. Over the three years Shen Jiu had been owned by the Qiu household, Qiu Haitang had blossomed from an innocent little girl to an innocent young woman; her naivety had not lessened over the years, she was still as blind as ever.

Shen Jiu followed after her miss mechanically, making sure to make herself look like she actually cared about the hairpin. It was indeed a fine thing; made of silver, beautiful flowers decorated the top, and from there hung green gemstones. “It’s nice,” she settled on saying.

Qiu Haitang grinned and immediately pulled some silver out of her sleeve and handed it to the merchant selling the hairpin. She then twirled Shen Jiu around so she instead faced away from her. “There we go!” Qiu Haitang exclaimed happily after putting the pin into Shen Jiu’s hair. “Now Xiao Jiu looks even prettier!”

She smiled back at the excited young girl, in these moments she almost forgot about the brand on her back. To people watching they were simply two young women buying things for each other; they weren’t mistress and slave, they were just a pair of friends.

But it was just a daydream; Shen Jiu wasn’t Haitang’s equal, she was her plaything, she belonged to the Qius, and thinking anything else was stupid, foolish.

As they began their walk back to the Qiu estate, Shen Jiu’s eyes caught on a little crowd gathered around someone by the side of the road. With her interest piqued, Shen Jiu instead started walking towards the crowd instead of following Qiu Haitang.

Something drew her there, something in that rotten heart of hers that desperately wanted an escape, the last bit of that little spark of hope buried in her chest.

Shen Jiu stood quietly next to Qiu Jianluo grinding ink as the man wrote. When his writing was near completion, Shen Jiu decided to speak up.

“Master Qiu, there’s something I..” she began, but was interrupted by Qiu Jianluo swiftly putting his brush away before slamming his hand down on the desk.

He looked up blankly at her, something dangerous flickering in his eyes. “Is this about that jianghu scam artist who’s been lurking in the city?”

Shen Jiu fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Senior Wu Yanzi is not a scam—”

Once again she was interrupted, but this time by Qiu Jianluo roughly grabbing her wrist and pulling her onto his lap. He grabbed Shen Jiu’s face and pulled her uncomfortably close. “You may not even think of such frivolous fantasies; Xiao Jiu’s place is here, to be a good wife, to stay here and live a peaceful life with me and Tang-er.”

She gritted her teeth and suppressed the urge to spit right in his face. “Live a peaceful life..? Live a peaceful life.. I don't want this kind of life!” Shen Jiu shouted and unsuccessfully tried to break free from Qiu Jianluo’s bruising grip.

Raging fury flashed in Qiu Jianluo’s eyes; he slapped Shen Jiu clean across the face before throwing her onto the floor. Shen Jiu landed on the ground with a loud thud, then he pulled her up by her hair. “I gave you the honor of being betrothed to me!” Qiu Jianluo yelled. “I’ve taught you all I know, and you want to leave and run after some jianghu scam artist!?”

Shen Jiu slapped his hand away and snarled, blood dripping from her nose. “They’re not scams, they’re immortal techniques!” she hisses. “Senior Wu Yanzi is not a scam artist; talentless people like you only say that to comfort themselves for being ordinary!”

Pinning Shen Jiu down by her throat, Qiu Jianluo chuckles darkly as he caresses her face. “Xiao Jiu wants to cultivate to immortality?” he asks. His tone is sickeningly affectionate, but it just sends violent shivers down Shen Jiu’s spine. “Xiao Jiu barely counts as human, and she wants to become an immortal?”

Unable to speak because of the hand tightening around her throat, Shen Jiu stays deathly silent, but still glares viciously at Master Qiu. Realizing she has no way of shouting for help, Qiu Jianluo lets his free hand wander downward towards Shen Jiu’s chest.

“Xiao Jiu, if you promise to never think of such childish fantasies again, then I might just forget this ever happened,” Qiu Jianluo whispered into her ear; their closeness made her blood boil with rage. “You can still become my good little wife, and what’s there even for you to cultivate? You’re too old, even if you leave me for him, are you sure he’ll want you?”

Then he started to unfasten her dress; Shen Jiu saw red. She managed to rip her neck out of his grip, bit down on his hand, and kicked him right in the crotch. Qiu Jianluo cried out in pain and pushed her away from him. Shen Jiu grabbed the inkstone from the table and threw it at the man, it missed, but it splattered a good amount of ink in his face.

“You damned bitch! If it weren’t for me you’d still be out on the street, you’d probably be getting fucked by old men in an alley for money!” Qiu Jianluo roared. He quickly collected himself and rushed towards Shen Jiu, he looked more like a beast than a man.

She clumsily avoided his lunge and the man ran straight into the bookshelf. Looking around for any kind of weapon, Shen Jiu’s frantic eyes landed on the sword hanging on the wall, she pulled it down and drew it out of its sheath, Qiu Jianluo stared at her holding the sword in shaking hands, then threw his head back and cackled.

Qiu Jianluo didn’t think she was capable enough to actually kill him, in his eyes she was just a weak little girl. “Xiao Jiu, you still have quite a temper, don’t you?” he stalked closer to her, Shen Jiu gritted her teeth and tried to keep her hands steady. “Calm down, I’ll only take from you what’s rightfully mine, nothing more.”

Shen Jiu stepped back. “Stay away!”

Master Qiu just continued to step forward, as he did he continued speaking, “You’re nothing, less than nothing, you’re just a little—”

He wasn’t able to finish what he was going to say, the sword that had been run through his stomach prevented him from doing so. Shen Jiu wrenched the sword back before looking down on the bloodied blade. She’d.. she’d actually done it– she stabbed him..! She’d—

Qiu Jianluo’s temporary shock wore off quickly and as soon as he found his voice again he loudly shouted for guards to enter the room. The door was kicked open as Shen Jiu lunged at Qiu Jianluo and wrapped her hands around his neck. The guards stared in shock for a moment before making a move towards their target.

Panicked, Shen Jiu let go of Qiu Jianluo’s neck with one of her hands and formed a seal, the sword she’d thrown to the side stabbed through the chests of the guards. Calling the sword back to her hand, Shen Jiu stood up and turned back to the bleeding master on the floor.

Shen Jiu cared not for his terrified face as she raised the sword and pierced it right through his lung. The next she ran through his throat, the next his chest again, the next his eye, the next his other eye, the next his heart.

She kept on thrusting the sword in and out of the now dead beast’s body until it was completely unrecognizable. Gone was the handsome but vile monster of Qiu Jianluo, replaced by a violent mess of blood and gore.

His blood had turned the glistening white blade nearly completely crimson; she trembled and panted heavily as everything that had just happened sank in.

She’d done it, she’d killed him, she’d finally killed him.

Qiu Jianluo was dead, he was dead by her hands, just as it was always meant to happen.

The sound of porcelain breaking brought her back to reality; in the doorway stood Wen Bai, his whole body trembling violently as he cried out in horror at all the corpses and gore surrounding the blood-covered girl in the middle of it all.

Shen Jiu called the sword back to her hands, before immediately sending it piercing right through Wen Bai’s chest— an unfortunate victim of circumstance.

An expression of unbridled, sinister joy spread across her face when she stepped over the dead bodies littering the room and entered the hallway. As she walked through the estate, she killed every man she saw; a pair of guards foolishly tried to ambush her, Shen Jiu just slashed their throats and watched with unshielded delight as the bloody fountains sprayed.

She ignored the women and children cowering in the corners of the house as she continued her carnage; most of them had done nothing to her, and Shen Jiu had her gazes set on the real beasts in the estate.

A horror-stricken scream coming from behind her temporarily woke Shen Jiu from her deranged state, and she slowly turned around to face whoever was screaming. Qiu Haitang stood at the end of the hallway, the young girl’s mouth was covered by her hands in horror as she stared with wide eyes at the figure of Shen Jiu at the end of the hall.

At that moment, with how covered in blood and gore Shen Jiu’s clothes and body was, she looked more like a vengeful ghost than a human being.

Young Miss Qiu’s whole quivering body swayed before falling forward, right into a pool of blood, soaking her sleeping robes in the blood belonging to some of the slaughtered members of her household.

For a moment, Shen Jiu just watched her lay motionless on the floor with a soft expression, even if the Qius had brought her nothing but misery, Haitang was nothing but an innocent child. She wasn’t smart enough to realize what was going on around her.

Her brother always made sure his sister’s plaything was meticulously clean when he handed her back to Haitang, he never acted out of bounds around his precious little sister, how was she supposed to figure out what a monster he truly was?

Something deep in her chest whispered traitorously in Shen Jiu’s ear. “You care for her, you know leaving her here to die is too cruel, even for you.”

…

Curse Yue Qi and the damned half a fragment of kindness he’d somehow managed to leave behind in Shen Jiu after he left. She cursed her Qi-ge every step of the way as she dragged Qiu Haitang’s unconscious body out of the Qiu estate.

After dropping Qiu Haitang on the ground a bit away from the house, she turned back to look at the estate one last time.

It had been set ablaze, the pained screams of the men she’d lethally injured but left alive filled the silence of the night. The fire warmed her rotten heart tremendously, she laughed in disbelief as the fire kept spreading; it looked just like how she had felt every time Qiu Jianluo had touched her.

He couldn’t do that anymore, he was dead, none of them could touch her anymore, they were all dead.

As she left the hell that was the Qiu estate behind with her new shifu, she almost didn’t regret a single thing.

The only thing she regretted was that she’d waited so long to do it; she’d foolishly believed that Yue Qi would’ve somehow survived the hardships the world would throw at him, that he would somehow manage to become strong enough to save her.

Qi-ge was too foolish for their world, his heart caused nothing but suffering for himself and for Shen Jiu.

He was probably dead in a ditch somewhere, and Shen Jiu swore that she didn’t care at all.

Chapter Text

Being a disciple of Wu Yanzi’s was not like joining a prestigious sect and learning righteous techniques; the man practiced demonic cultivation and used dirty tricks to rob, massacre, and take advantage of chaos.

Wu Yanzi was nowhere near a good man– he was just as rotten as Shen Jiu– and he was an even worse teacher, but at least she learned some things.

He taught Shen Jiu to kill, rob, and how to take advantage of anything, anyone, and everything.

He taught her techniques that would make even the least righteous cultivator in the jianghu pull their hair out and scream themselves hoarse at how they were disgracing the very concept of cultivation.

But Shen Jiu didn’t care; she was way past the age where people normally started cultivating with regular, upstanding techniques, how else would she get what she wanted if she didn’t use other methods?

While being Wu Yanzi’s disciple was many thousand times better than what she’d been put through during her time at the Qiu household, it was a fairly low threshold to cross.

Shen Jiu wasn’t an idiot, she knew that Wu Yanzi would sooner or later abandon her as well; when he got tired of her and had no more use of her “talents,” he’d leave her behind, or maybe he’d just kill her.

He didn’t care for her, she was just a tool, but she held not a single drop of affection for him either.

Shen Jiu’s shifu was a rotten man, and he had no problems with becoming violent and beating his disciple if he got too annoyed with something she’d said or done. And he enjoyed using Shen Jiu’s looks to his advantage when it came to some of his schemes.

He would often send his little disciple into a dingy brothel or out on the streets, ordering her to scour them for the wealthiest man she could find, and lure him into her arms so she could rob him of all he had.

All the men she came across were the same, none of them were willing to give up the chance to have a taste of a pretty young thing who was basically throwing herself at them. A bunch of toads who wanted a taste of swan meat; too bad that the beautiful swan was actually a bloodthirsty beast wrapped in silk.

The furthest they’d get to have a taste of her was to embrace Shen Jiu in a dirty alley somewhere; anyone who tried to take it further immediately got their throat slit and then had their corpse throughly looted.

Well, it actually didn’t matter if they couldn’t keep their dirty hands to themselves. Shen Jiu killed every single fucker without fail, and she didn’t feel a single drop of regret, it wasn’t something she could feel.

When she returned to her shifu after a successful killing, he’d throw his head back and laugh maniacally before praising his good and obedient little disciple for being so perfectly and utterly heartless.

“My little disciple is so cruel, dare this master say his disciple might be even more ruthless than him.”

Being heartless wasn’t anything new to Shen Jiu; in this life, having a heart and caring about other people would sooner or later lead to someone’s downfall.

Every time after one of these “scourings”, Shen Jiu would rent a room at whatever inn she could find and request a scalding bath be drawn for her. Then she’d spend nearly a shichen just scrubbing where the now dead fucker she’d killed that night had touched her.

Of course, none of the men had such a scorching and vile touch as Qiu Jianluo used to have, though that didn’t stop Shen Jiu from nearly peeling away every last layer of skin every time it happened.

One particular night, Wu Yanzi had decided to leave Shen Jiu at the Warm Red Pavilion while he went out and took care of some business. She didn’t know exactly what he’d be doing— she had her guesses, but she’d long since learned that asking her shifu any idiotic questions would just earn her a beating.

Shen Jiu and her shifu traveled between towns often, just to keep cultivators from catching them. But they always returned to one particular town quite regularly.

It was a bit too close to Tian Gong Mountain Range for comfort, but neither master nor disciple cared, they were always pulled back there eventually.

She never cared for what her master did at the brothel, for all she knew he probably just went to it like any other man like him would, to pay for services. But she knew the workers despised him; it was quite amusing to sometimes hear them talk about his drunken idiocy.

The ladies at the Warm Red Pavilion were kind, most of them far too kind to someone like her. Shen Jiu treasured every single little moment she spent in the comforting presence of the brothel’s women.

Shen Jiu entered the room she always rented when she stayed at the brothel; the room was practically hers at this point. The woman who owned the brothel had even tried to coax her into not paying since it was an old room that wasn’t used by guests, but Shen Jiu always refused the offer and paid the fee in full.

Inside her room a group of beautifully dressed and sweet-smelling girls sat and giddily gossiped while patiently waiting for their favorite patron to arrive.

Shen Jiu quietly closed the door behind her, unsure if interrupting the girls’ happy conversation would be terribly rude. But one of the women, Chu-jie, looked over towards the door and her already lovely wide smile grew even bigger and even lovelier.

“A-Jiu! You’re finally here, we’ve been waiting for so long!” Chu-jie said happily and hurried over to wrap her arms tightly around Shen Jiu.

The ladies of the Warm Red Pavilion always welcomed Shen Jiu with open arms; they always smelled of sweet fragrances and fresh flowers; it never once failed to calm her. Two more women, Tao-jie and Xiuying-jie, also joined in on the embrace.

Their touch never burned, it was comforting, it was soft, and it was lovely. It temporarily alleviated Shen Jiu of how hollow her chest felt. It was a comforting warmth, dare she even say it made her feel safe.

(She’d never had the privilege of feeling safe before.)

“A-Jiu is very sorry for making jiejie wait,” Shen Jiu said, her voice coming out muffled because of how the ladies were pressing her face into the fabric of their clothes. “What did you all wish to do?”

The girls all shared a gleeful look and didn’t answer as they dragged her over to sit at the vanity in the room, giggling and whispering to each other just quiet enough so that Shen Jiu couldn’t hear. She raised a brow at their giddiness but decided to just let them run free and remove her cloak and her hair.

Shen Jiu let out a pleased sigh when Xiuying-jie’s sharp nails scratched her neck, she didn’t even bother to complain about how roughly the woman combed through her inky hair with the wide tooth comb.

She started feeling a bit suspicious when in the corner of her eye she saw Chu-jie holding a beautiful dress in her hands, one that was definitely not Chu-jie’s size.

“Jiejie, who is that for?” Shen Jiu cautiously asked, even though she was pretty sure she already knew the answer. The other girls just kept giggling as Chu-jie waltzed over and put the dress down on the vanity along with an assortment of jewelry and accessories.

Chu-jie softly smiled down at Shen Jiu and gently petted her hair. “We all wanted to try and make A-Jiu even prettier tonight; will A-Jiu please let us?”

The affectionate tone of the woman’s voice and the way all the girls were looking at her with pleading eyes— Shen Jiu may be cruel, but she did shamelessly enjoy making these ladies happy.

Instead of denying their fun, she just waved her hand dismissively and said, “Do as you wish.”

A shichen later, one of the women painted the last finishing touches on Shen Jiu’s face and another put one last accessory in her hair.

“Alright, A-Jiu can open her eyes now!” Tao-jie said as she clapped her hands together excitedly.

Shen Jiu carefully opened her eyes and looked down in the bronze mirror that one of the girls was pushing into her hands. She was stunned by her reflection.

The girls had braided most of her hair and pinned the braids up into shapes that resembled butterflies’ wings. The dress she’d been loaned was made from soft pale blue and green silks and gauze embroidered with flowers, beautiful glittering jewelry hung from her hair and around her neck.

They were the most beautiful things she’d ever worn, even the clothes Qiu Jianluo sometimes forced her to wear to “keep face” for the household when he had guests over couldn’t begin to compare to these.

The girl in the reflection that was looking back at her looked nothing like the rotten Shen Jiu she was so used to having stare back at her.

This unfamiliar Shen Jiu in the mirror didn’t look like the ruthless disciple of a demonic cultivator or a dirty little slave; the girl in the mirror looked more like an elegant young mistress from a wealthy family.

(A childish fantasy; it’d never be real, but pretending that it could become reality was fun.)

Shen Jiu stared at her reflection quietly, still taking it in properly. “You–” she tried, but she didn’t exactly know what to say. She wasn’t sure how to react, it was too strange, unfamiliar, it would never be real.

“Thank you,” was what she settled on stiffly saying.

The girls all happily laughed and pulled Shen Jiu up on her feet. “Come on, come on, Madam Xu promised to make Jin-gege show us how to play the qin tonight!” Xiuying-jie exclaimed as she dragged Shen Jiu out of the room and down the stairs into the main hall of the pavilion.

Normally Shen Jiu wouldn’t tolerate being dragged around like this, but these girls had somehow managed to carve their way into Shen Jiu’s chest and made a place for themselves there; it was hard to tell them no, especially when they sounded so happy.

So for that night, Shen Jiu simply pretended to be someone else. A girl who’d never been a slave, a girl who didn’t ruthlessly kill people without feeling any kind of guilt; a girl who had a heart.

A year after she burned the Qiu estate to the ground, Wu Yanzi had the bright idea to sneak into the bounds of the Immortal Alliance Conference.

“So many brats die there anyway, who’ll care that a couple more perish at the hands of us? And they’re rich, so very rich.” Wu Yanzi had said; he wasn’t really arguing to convince his disciple, Shen Jiu knew she had no real choice in the matter, but she didn’t think it was that bad of an idea.

(She should’ve known it could only turn out badly.)

Shen Jiu roughly wrenched her sword out of the chest of a young cultivator; he’d been horribly inexperienced, his form was even sloppier than hers, and she’d never even taken a single look in one of the proper cultivation manuals they had in those pompous sects.

The young man had been a disciple of Huan Hua Palace, his previously golden– now a deep crimson– robes with the palace’s symbol on them were a dead giveaway. She scoffed; these fools were an even bigger waste of the immortal masters’ time than she’d originally thought. They couldn’t even defend themselves against a self-taught swordsman with near nonexistent cultivation, utterly pathetic.

She looked over the corpses of the ignorant young cultivators that had been slaughtered by her, they were all drenched in the blood of each other, in her mind their faces all merged together into one. The blood and gore was familiar, and morbidly comforting in a way.

Shen Jiu flicked the blood off her blade, crouched down by one of the bodies, and began looting it dry.

They didn’t have anything too valuable on them, just small pouches of money or a hairpiece that could be sold for a measly few pieces of silver, much to Shen Jiu’s frustration. Unfortunately, the Immortal Alliance Conference wasn’t an event you wanted to be burdened with unnecessary belongings at.

Even though her findings were absolutely disappointing, Shen Jiu took everything she could find and stuffed it into the qiankun pouch she’d stolen from a traveling cultivator a few weeks back.

Her loot from this batch consisted of four tiny bags containing silver, six simple guans, and a few shabby hairpins; Wu Yanzi definitely wouldn’t be satisfied with it, but what could she do? Nothing, wasn’t her fault. He’d probably find a way to make it her fault though.

Think of the devil and he will appear; just as Shen Jiu stood up and was about to go find some more disciples to rob, she heard the familiar sound of Wu Yanzi’s cackling laughter coming from a few zhang away.

“The hell is he laughing about?” Shen Jiu thought to herself. She was about to run over and find her shifu, but the sound of approaching steps coming from the direction she’d been heading in previously made her stop dead in her tracks.

The crackling of leaves sounded under the heavy boots of whoever was approaching; Shen Jiu crooked her finger and her sword shot out, soaring in the direction of whoever it was that dared to approach.

But as the person’s face was suddenly illuminated by the moonlight shining over the clearing, her sword stuttered in the air and fell to the ground with a clang.

Shen Jiu's blood ran cold and she froze completely, all blood drained from her face and colored her skin a ghostly white hue. It couldn’t be—

His face was much healthier and obviously older than it’d been four years ago, it was different yet still so familiar, Shen Jiu wouldn’t be able to forget his face no matter how hard she tried to, never in a hundred years.

Qi-ge. Qi-ge was alive, he was here. Qi-ge was— he was a cultivator? He’d actually done it?

Yue Qi too had paled and frozen the moment he laid eyes on Shen Jiu’s face; the man hesitantly took two slow steps forward. He didn’t even bat an eye at the bodies of the dead disciples lying on the ground.

For a few moments it seemed like time had frozen around them. They just stared at each other, it seemed like both of them had stopped breathing.

The moment was broken as Yue Qi started opening his trembling mouth to speak. But before he had the chance to say a single word, Shen Jiu threw herself down towards one of the corpses and pulled an emergency firework out of their sleeve and lit it.

The explosion of color painted both of the living youths in beautiful reds and whites.

Two souls reunited, surrounded by death.

Yue Qi quickly recovered from the shock and stepped forward again, reaching his hand out and whispering disbelievingly, “Xiao Jiu..?”

Before Shen Jiu could react, someone behind her placed a hand on her shoulder. She knew that hand. She quickly turned around to face Wu Yanzi.

“So my little disciple does know how to feel fear,” he said while tightening his grip on her shoulder. “Who might it be that’s gotten you so scared?”

Shen Jiu glanced back at Yue Qi for a brief moment before hardening her face. “This disciple isn’t afraid of him; we should get out of here, this disciple didn’t pay attention and he was able to release a firework,” Shen Jiu lied. “The masters will soon come and investigate, let’s leave while we still have the chance.”

She tried to pull her shifu along so they could leave, but Yue Qi moved quickly so he blocked their way. His face was still pale and his eyes were red-rimmed, but his expression had changed into something icy.

He put a hand on the hilt of his sword. “I won’t let you leave,” Yue Qi said matter-of-factly, his voice was hoarse but his tone was commanding, and there was a promise of retaliation if they decided to not listen.

Wu Yanzi gave the youth dressed in black and gold robes and his sword in front of him a once over before scoffing. “Ah, Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, from Qiong Ding Peak. The Xuan Su Sword, Yue Qingyuan?”

Yue Qingyuan?

Shen Jiu’s whole body stiffened further.

Who hadn’t heard of the Xuan Su Sword, Yue Qingyuan? The future sect leader of the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, an incredibly promising young cultivator, and said to currently be the brightest talent of Cang Qiong’s future generation of peak lords.

This was the Xuan Su Sword, Yue Qingyuan? Yue Qi?

So he didn’t end up a corpse in a ditch somewhere; her Qi-ge had climbed so far up in the world, how very impressive. (The abandoned slave buried deep down in her chest begged to be let out, begged to be allowed to ask why he didn’t come back. She pushed it down.)

Shen Jiu kept urging Wu Yanzi to leave, they needed to go now or else they would for sure be captured. “Shifu, we need to leave, the immortal masters will come here any moment now!”

But the man just shoved her to the ground and drew his sword, pointing it provokingly at Yue Qingyuan. “He may be from Cang Qiong Mountain, but I do not fear a mere child, he came seeking death!” Wu Yanzi snarled.

“What a fucking fool,” Shen Jiu inwardly scoffed as she got up on her feet again.

Both of the men shot forward and crossed swords; even though Wu Yanzi was many years Yue Qingyuan’s senior, the youth was meeting his blows skillfully without even drawing his sword, not allowing himself to be pushed back too far or thrown off his feet.

But even though it was obvious that Yue Qingyuan was probably good enough to best her shifu in proper, fair combat, Shen Jiu knew her master too well to dare to relax for even a single second.

Wu Yanzi was someone who played dirty and had no problem using underhanded tricks to gain the upper hand in a fight. He was a master of using cursed talismans and things that could catch people completely off guard and let him kill them with ease, he’d killed many powerful cultivators like that.

So when Shen Jiu saw her shifu reaching into his sleeve, she knew that she had to do something.

(She didn’t give a fuck about Yue Qingyuan, she didn’t care about him at all, she was just acting for her own benefit, that’s it.)

Before Wu Yanzi could throw the talisman he’d been reaching for, a sword was thrust right through his heart from behind. The man turned his head and looked back at his ruthless disciple with wide, bloodshot eyes.

Shen Jiu pulled the sword back out of him without even flinching; her face remained cold and unaffected even as the blood of her master splattered onto her face.

The now dead man fell forward and hit the ground with a heavy thud, Shen Jiu’s hand was suddenly grabbed and Yue Qingyuan sprinted away from the scene of the crime, pulling the bloodied Shen Jiu along with him.

The two youths panted heavily as they finally came to a stop, they’d been running without stopping for a while; they were nowhere near the bloodied mess of disciples all killed by Shen Jiu, or the corpse of the now dead man she’d called shifu, who she’d also killed

As she breathed, Shen Jiu took a long look at the young man next to her. His black and golden robes were made from some of the finest fabrics she’d ever seen, and his sword had radiated immense power without even being drawn; he looked nothing like the starved, good hearted street rat she’d known.

The way he carried himself in the trading of blows with Wu Yanzi was like that of an immortal master, he was skilled, obviously powerful, truly worthy of being called one of the brightest talents of his generation.

But this was not Yue Qi.

Yue Qingyuan looked just like he was a poised and refined young master from a prestigious noble family, someone who wouldn’t dare to sully their name by being close to someone like Shen Jiu.

Shen Jiu scowled. “So you joined the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect,” she said, bitterness quickly making its way into her voice. “You’ve even become Qiong Ding Peak’s head disciple, how impressive.”

Yue Qingyuan paled further and further with every word she spat at him. Shen Jiu couldn’t tell what he was thinking, she didn’t understand what his face was saying. He just stayed silent, his gaze flickering down towards the dirty ground instead of her.

Shen Jiu scowled; too good to look her in the eye? Whatever, it didn’t matter, she didn’t care, she only had one question she needed him to answer.

She took a steadying breath before asking, “Why did you never come back for me?”

The silence that followed was suffocating. Yue Qingyuan just stared at Shen Jiu with a crushed expression, an unfamiliar emotion marred his features.

Every second he stayed quiet she grew angrier; she didn’t get it, why wasn’t he saying anything?

“I…” Yue Qingyuan began, but immediately closed his mouth and looked down at the ground again.

Guilt. That was the emotion that was residing on his face. She hated how it looked, he knew he’d done something wrong, he knew he’d abandoned her.

Shen Jiu hated his face; when they were young her Qi-ge’s face had been the only thing that’d been able to make her feel something other than anger.

Now she wanted to slash it to bits with her sword.

She wanted to scream until she coughed blood. Was she really worth that little to him? Not worthy enough to go back for? Not even worthy enough to get an answer to one simple fucking question?

“Why aren’t you answering?” Shen Jiu spat, her words dripping with pure, bitter venom. “I’ve been waiting for such a long time, so a little more is nothing, is that right? Why won’t you just answer!?”

Yue Qingyuan finally met her gaze and said with a small voice, “I’m sorry— Qi-ge is sorry, Xiao Jiu..”

…

The suffocating silence returned. Her clenched fists shook, she grit her teeth, and then Shen Jiu laughed.

It was a mirthless, bitter sound, her body shook as she continued laughing; Yue Qingyuan stared at her with his face a mix of guilt, confusion, and horror.

…

The only thing Shen Jiu could feel as she looked at the young man in front of her who was wearing Qi-ge’s face was raw, unbridled rage; she wanted to laugh even louder, she wanted to spit right in his face.

He was sorry. Sorry for what?

Breaking his promise and leaving her to rot in hell?

Oh, he was sorry, Yue Qingyuan was sorry.

It was too bad that Shen Jiu was heartless. If she was anyone else, then maybe his apologies would’ve worked, but the single piece of her heart that was still intact and untouched had finally crumbled apart.

In that moment Shen Jiu realized that she’d preferred it when she thought that he was dead.

She’d preferred the thought of him being dead, at least then he’d have an excuse for why he never came back, and he wouldn’t just be offering empty apologies.

Yue Qi was dead.

But the incredible Yue Qingyuan was alive and well, and he was a promising young cultivator with a bright future ahead of him. Someone with plenty of boundless talent, the future leader of the most prominent of the four great sects. The reputable Xuan Su Sword.

“Why didn’t you come back?” She asked again, resentment and fury swirled in the gaping pit behind her ribcage that contained her cold, rotten heart.

Yue Qingyuan just averted his eyes again. “I’m sorry, Qi-ge is sorry, so very sorry.”

Was that all he knew how to say? Sorry? What use was meaningless apologies if he refused to tell her exactly what he was apologizing for?

Shen Jiu hated Yue Qingyuan. The fury in her chest threatened to boil over. “Is that all you know how to say? Sorry, sorry for what? Why won’t you tell me!?”

Yue Qingyuan stepped forward and reached out to her. “Come back to the sect with me, please Xiao Jiu, I want to help you,” he pleaded. “Let me help you, let Qi-ge fix all of this—“

Shen Jiu just let her ears tune out his pathetic pleading and stared down at the hand holding onto her wrist. It was such a familiar hold, one she’d longed for. Now it just felt so wrong; she hated it.

He’d fix all of this? She wasn’t something that he could just fix; she was way too wrong to be fixed before he’d abandoned her, the years in that hell just made her even more and more beyond repair.

Oh, how easy it would be to just wrench her hand out of his grip and run the other way, run far, far away from Yue Qingyuan and never look back again.

But where would she run to? Where would she go?

Back to the safety of the Warm Red Pavilion? Anywhere in the world that wasn’t near Yue Qingyuan?

She’d still need to sneak out of the conference without getting caught by the sects, and they’d absolutely be hunting her down for killing their useless disciples.

All her currently available options were fucking horrible, but going to Cang Qiong with Yue Qingyuan would probably mean she wouldn’t be executed right away.

So she didn’t resist when Yue Qingyuan started pulling her along again. “Why is he even bothering?” Shen Jiu bitterly thinks as he pulls her through the dense forest. “He’s clearly too good to even look at me, so why bring me back to his sect? Because he pities me?”

Shen Jiu hated being pitied, and she hated people who broke their promises. Yue Qingyuan were all the things she despised combined into one big fucking package.

She found herself wishing she’d found Yue Qi’s decaying remains instead; he’d be dead, yes, but at least it would be better than having to see and hating this new, powerful, and promising version of him.

She knew that was a selfish wish. But Shen Jiu already knew that she was heartless from the beginning, so why would she give a shit if it was selfish?

Chapter Text

In the meeting hall of Qiong Ding Peak, a young man was kowtowing on the floor before the sect leader, Song Mingyue, while a girl dressed in plain white robes with her spine straighter than a rod stood right behind him, closely observing the woman in front of them.

Sect Leader Song Mingyue was an imposing figure; she wore luxurious black and golden robes, even finer than Yue Qingyuan’s. Her long white hair made her look ethereal, and the air of a true immortal master hung around her when she sharply stared down at her kneeling successor with piercing gray eyes.

“Truly an intimidating sight,” Shen Jiu noted.

“Qingyuan,” Song Mingyue said sternly as she rose from her seat. “I know you wish for your companion to join our sect, but just coming in here like—“

Yue Qingyuan pressed himself even further down into the floor. “Please, Shizun,” he pleaded, interrupting his master. His tone made Shen Jiu internally scoff at how desperate he sounded. “I’ll do anything, just please let her join the sect..”

The sect leader started massaging her temples, Song Mingyue looked very done with her head disciple. “Qingyuan, you’re—“

"I'll take her.”

A third voice had suddenly spoken from behind Shen Jiu. She turned her head around; jade green phoenix eyes locked with a pair of fox eyes that resembled two pools of molten gold.

The owner of the eyes was a man with neat black hair pulled up into a sleek ponytail who was dressed in exorbitant green robes standing a few steps behind her and Yue Qingyuan, a sharp smile dancing across his beautiful features as he lazily fanned himself.

The man’s frame was slender, his shoulders and waist thin, and he was not very tall. His face had a way more of a feminine look than most other men Shen Jiu had met; she could’ve easily mistaken him for a courtesan working at the Warm Red Pavilion just by judging how he looked and carried himself.

Song Mingyue sighed and stared at the man, looking unimpressed. “Shu Mingru,” she (exasperatedly) greeted. “What brings Shu-shidi to Qiong Ding Peak today of all days? This master thought shidi was meant to be in seclusion for three more months.”

The man— Shu Mingru— chuckled and stepped closer to Shen Jiu. She watched him with weary eyes; just from his general demeanor, she could tell this man was not someone you should let your guard down around.

The man circled Shen Jiu with an amused glint in his eyes, she followed his every move like a hawk. He smiled brightly. “This shidi was indeed in seclusion but exited early; something told me I’d find something more interesting outside the caves rather than inside.”

Shu Mingru used his closed fan to raise Shen Jiu’s chin up so he could take a proper look at her face. “And that something was right; this shidi humbly requests Zhangmen-shijie grant him permission to take this child as his disciple.”

Shen Jiu resisted the urge to gawk. This man spoke as sleazily as he looked; could he really just come and go as he pleased to the sect leader and demand that some girl— that had been brought in without showing any qualifications— become his disciple?

The sect leader’s flat stare flickered between Shen Jiu and the still smiling Shu Mingru for a few seconds before turning around, she waved her hand dismissively in the air. “Do as you wish, Shu-shidi,” Song Mingyue said before sighing deeply. “Qingyuan’s companion may join Qing Jing Peak.”

The Qing Jing Peak Lord put his hands behind his back and leaned forward ever so slightly. “This master’s name is Shu Mingru, but you may address him as Shizun,” the man said with a half-smile before he suddenly began to stroll out of the hall.

Shen Jiu noted that he didn’t even as much as nod to show thanks to the sect leader, was that something the lord of the second ranked peak could just not do?

She glanced back at Yue Qingyuan who was still kneeling on the ground, his face still guilty; what a pitiful man. Shen Jiu made sure to cup her hands and show proper respect to the sect leader, and shoot the head disciple of Qiong Ding Peak one last frosty glare before hurrying to catch up with her new master.

Qing Jing Peak was just as beautiful as the rumors spread around the towns she’d visited said it would be. The lush, green bamboo forests that grew on the peak made for a grand sight— truly breathtaking.

The new master and disciple pair walked on the long stone pathway that slithered through the peak, they passed by a good handful of disciples on their way to wherever Shen Jiu’s new master was bringing her.

All of Qing Jing Peak’s disciples wore neat and elegant robes of white and green, many of them carried around either scrolls, books, or instruments, most of them looked to be young adults in their early to late twenties, and all of them shared some kind of staring problem.

It wouldn’t be too presumptuous to assume they'd never seen another person before with the way they all openly gawked at Shen Jiu.

She ignored all the stares that threatened to set her back on fire with how intense they were, and instead tried to memorize the layout of Qing Jing Peak.

It was a place with more ponds and pavilions than she’d ever seen in her life, and throughout the whole peak calming sounds of disciples playing different instruments could be heard. A clear and calm peak indeed, the place truly lived up to its name.

Eventually Shu Mingru broke the silence between them, he still wore that wide grin of his as he asked, “So, what is my new little disciple’s name?”

Shen Jiu stared at him quietly, she didn’t like how he spoke, or how he acted, or how his general presence felt. She’d more easily believe he was a huli jing in disguise rather than a human cultivator.

But it wasn’t a presence that disgusted her like Qiu Jianluo’s. It was something different, something that told her he wasn’t trustworthy at all, but it wasn’t something that gave her the itch to kill him. But she’d most definitely need to be on her toes around him, just in case her intuition turned out to be wrong.

“This disciple’s name is Shen Jiu,” she replied curtly, trying not to sound too rude; getting kicked off the peak for lack of manners before even half a shichen had passed would be fairly inconvenient.

Shu Mingru hid the lower half of his face behind his fan and continued to observe her from the corner of his eye as they walked. (Shen Jiu didn’t even understand why he made an effort to use the fan, it was obvious he was smiling even when hiding his mouth.)

“Shen Jiu,” the man echoed, looking amused. The way it sounded when he placed great emphasis on the second part of her name gave Shen Jiu the urge to grab him and ask what the hell that meant.

“Ah, here we are, let us head inside.”

Shen Jiu hadn’t even realized they’d been approaching a building, she’d been too busy glaring at her new master to notice. The building that Shu Mingru had brought her to was very obviously his own residence, it was hidden away from the prying eyes of the disciples, and it just didn’t look like a hall of learning.

Its architecture reminded her of a leisure house more than a house fit for the lord of the scholarly peak.

Shu Mingru led his new disciple through the house and brought her into what Shen Jiu assumed was his study, then the man sat down in a chair and looked at Shen Jiu with an expectant smile.

Shen Jiu tilted her head. “What does Shizun want this disciple to do?” she asked. Whatever it was he wanted, it must be a test of some sort.

“Brew me a cup of tea,” the peak lord said with a lazy smile. “Jiu-er does know how to brew tea, right?”

The ridiculous idea that she didn’t know how to brew tea made her snort out loud. “Of course,” Shen Jiu said. “This disciple will be right back.”

Maybe it wasn’t an unfounded doubt that the man had; most of the disciples of Qing Jing Peak were sons and daughters of rich lords and ladies, maybe famous scholars, people who could afford to learn. Most brats the age— between 8 and 12— that you usually joined a sect from those kinds of wealthy families didn’t have to learn how to properly brew before leaving home.

In the Qiu household, her place had been as little miss Qiu’s personal servant; she'd brewed hundreds, if not thousands of pots of tea. It was one of the first things she’d mastered— serving Master Qiu a bad cup of tea resulted in it being emptied over one’s head.

Now she was adamant to prove to her new master that she was not some incompetent fool.

Sure, she hadn’t actually wanted to join one of the twelve peaks, and certainly not Qing Jing— Xian Shu would’ve been preferred— but here she was, and she was not someone who gave up; she’d rather burn.

A little while later, Shen Jiu reentered the peak lord’s study while carrying a tray with a cup and a pot full of piping hot tea. It had taken way too long to find where the things were stored in the damn kitchen.

Shu Mingru watched with mellow interest from behind his fan as his new disciple served him the tea before kneeling down on the floor in front of him.

The peak lord swirled the liquid in the cup before taking a sip; he then leaned his head back and chuckled. “Such a disciple I’ve found,” Shu Mingru said. “Jiu-er is indeed skilled. Now, show me your wrist.”

Without hesitation, Shen Jiu reached her arm up for the man to inspect. Shu Mingru took a loose hold of her wrist and pressed his index and middle finger to the pulse point; he sent a thin, gentle stream of qi through her meridians.

The peak lord’s face went through a range of emotions before settling back into that lazy smile, he let go of her wrist with an amused expression.

Picking up his half filled teacup again, Shu Mingru looked down at Shen Jiu through half-lidded eyes. “Your base is weak, your meridians are severely damaged, and you’re way past the prime age for cultivating,” he said. “ I assume that I’ll be right if I say that I guess you’ve been using.. dubious.. cultivation methods before entering the sect?”

Each of his words hit like a slap in her face. Shen Jiu stiffened slightly but she kept her unaffected mask in place. “Shizun is right, is this disciple correct in guessing she’ll be getting thrown off the peak?”

She could already tell it was no use even trying to lie to this man, he seemed like the type of person who’d be able to smell someone even daring to think about lying to him from a hundred li away.

It probably wasn’t that much of a reach to think her piss-poor potential would warrant an immediate removal. Honestly she might prefer that option.

To her surprise, Shu Mingru snorted very inelegantly into his drink. “No, no, Jiu-er is not getting thrown off the peak,” he reassured. “Jiu-er is far too interesting for this master to just throw away, that’d be no fun.”

He suddenly got up on his feet and strode over to one of the bookshelves in the study. “Who cares if you're basically hopeless? The fun lies in trying, doesn’t it?” Shu Mingru stated as he threw a book at Shen Jiu without looking. “That’s a standard cultivation manual, I assume Jiu-er hasn’t read one of those.”

The peak lord looked over his shoulder and smirked down at the bewildered disciple. “And I don’t think Jiu-er is a completely lost cause; this master is sure that if she just works ten times harder than her peers, Jiu-er might reach middle foundation establishment stage.”

He said the last part with a good amount of challenge poorly hidden behind the words. It was obvious he’d already picked up on a few things about Shen Jiu’s nature just by observing her and making a few assumptions.

Like the fact that she would rather die than admit that she wasn’t able to do something that someone had told her she couldn’t or shouldn’t do.

Shen Jiu got up on her feet and bowed to the Qing Jing Peak Lord. “This lowly one thanks Shizun for believing in her; this disciple won’t let Shizun down.”

"Yes, yes," Shu Mingru yawned. “Now go and run off to the dormitories, I’ll send another disciple over with your new robes in a bit. Then tomorrow I'll follow you over to Qian Cao Peak for a standard examination. Now then, run along, little viper,” the peak lord said, his wide, foxy grin on full display while he lazily fluttered his fan in front of his chest.

Shen Jiu bit back the urge to snap back with a remark of her own and just left like he’d instructed. She stepped outside the house, and she was fuming.

Even if she worked ten times as hard as everyone else on Qing Jing Peak, she might only reach middle foundation establishment stage?

Pah! She’d show him. Shen Jiu hated people who dared think she was weak almost as much as she hated people who broke their promises.

Even though Wu Yanzi had definitely done something to further fuck up her cultivation, and even if she had less than a one in a million chance of cultivating to immortality— she would do it, she’d do it and prove everyone in this damn world wrong.

She clutched the cultivation manual that she’d been given tight in her hands. Shen Jiu didn’t like Shu Mingru in any way, shape, or form, he was definitely someone to stay on guard around, and she trusted the man as far as she could throw him.

But he was the key for her to finally become powerful; she needed his guidance, whether she liked it or not.

While she walked away from the peak lord’s residence, Shen Jiu took great care in observing every person she came across. They were all much older than her, no children in sight, was she really the youngest one?

Perhaps neither her shizun or the Qing Jing elders had any interest in taking in any new disciples from the disciple selections. Come to think of it, Cang Qiong Mountain’s ‘Ming’ generation had been around for a long while, probably well over a hundred years at this point. Perhaps the reason that Shu Mingru didn’t seem to have any newer disciples was because his generation would be retiring in not too long?

All the disciples she passed carried themselves like the pompous young masters they probably were, clearly thinking they were important. That’s probably how you were expected to act if you were a disciple of the noble Qing Jing Peak, like you were better than everyone.

Shen Jiu knew how to make do with that, she’d spent a good deal of time around people who thought themselves to be worth better than they really were.

After a good while of walking, Shen Jiu finally found herself at the female disciples’ dormitories; at one point she’d been forced to suck up her pride and ask for directions. The dorm she’d been directed to was currently empty, all the other occupants were out.

Shen Jiu looked around the dorm; there were five other beds that seemed to be occupied, so it seemed she’d unfortunately be forced to room with others.

Well, at least the dorms were separated by gender, otherwise she’d go and sleep in the woodshed.

The idea of sleeping around a pack of strangers irked her; she couldn’t even leave the peak and fly down to an inn to sleep, she didn’t have such a sword yet.

(Shen Jiu missed her jiejies at the Warm Red Pavilion a lot, even though she tried to deny it to herself, she missed them more than a lot.)

The sound of someone opening the door to the room and stepping inside behind her woke Shen Jiu from her mental grumblings.

She turned her head and was met with the sight of a young woman. She looked to be in her early twenties, with long black hair pulled back in a braid. The woman wore much fancier robes than any of the disciples Shen Jiu had seen earlier, they were the same style and quality like the ones Shu Mingru wore.

Her honey brown eyes looked Shen Jiu up and down before she smiled brightly— the smile didn’t reach her eyes, and it beamed with arrogance.

“Ah, you must be the new disciple that Shizun said he’d brought in?” the young woman asked while entering the room. “I am the head disciple, Chen Fei; Shizun told me to bring some spare robes for you.”

The woman handed Shen Jiu a neat pile of multiple sets of robes, regular green and white disciple robes just like everyone else on the peak wore, except for head disciple Chen Fei apparently.

“Thanking Da-shijie,” Shen Jiu said flatly before turning back to the bed she’d been inspecting. ‘How embarrassing it must feel to be the head disciple yet still have to run errands like this,’ she thought.

Apparently Shen Jiu’s clear desire to be alone wasn’t picked up on by Chen Fei— or maybe she just didn’t care— because the woman started chattering again.

“It’s been so long since Shizun has taken on any new disciples personally,” Chen Fei sighed. “You must have real talent for him to immediately take you in without a trial, and at your age..”

Shen Jiu turned her head and smiled, even though she was fighting the urge to sneer. “This disciple is very grateful to Shizun for giving this one the opportunity to join,” she said. “This one thanks Da-shijie for bringing the robes, but would appreciate it if shijie left this one alone so she could settle in.”

In truth, Shen Jiu just wanted this woman to leave so she could start going through her new manual right away and start working. And also because she just didn’t like Chen Fei, she was clearly looking down on Shen Jiu already; she was a waste of space.

Though she had no belongings; her sword had been dropped on the ground and forgotten when Yue Qingyuan dragged her out of the forest at the conference, her loot from the people she’d killed had been taken by Yue Qingyuan. She owned nothing else, what was there to settle in?

Well, the head disciple didn’t need to know that.

Chen Fei seemed baffled at her rude dismissal. “Ah, of course,” she said with yet another arrogant smile, though this one was more strained than the last. “This shijie will let shimei settle in, don’t hesitate to ask any of us seniors for help if you need it.”

Then she waltzed out of the room and shut the door loudly behind her. Shen Jiu was finally able to let out the scoff and eye roll she’d been holding in until then; that woman might become trouble later.

Perhaps already antagonizing the head disciple of the peak wasn’t the best idea, but Shen Jiu had no desire to suck up to a bunch of arrogant brats.

Flipping through the manual she’d been given, Shen Jiu soon found the pages that instructed the reader on how to meditate properly; meditation was something she’d never tried before.

She settled down on the floor in the lotus position and started to calm her breathing, the manual instructed to “clear the heart and mind.”

For the next shichen, Shen Jiu really tried to figure out how to do it, but all to no avail. Eventually she got so frustrated she flung her manual into the wall with an angry yell. She couldn’t stop thinking about Yue Qingyuan; his revoltingly guilty expression, how he’d left her behind for this damn sect and abandoned her with the Qius, and his fucking useless pity.

She gave up on meditating for that day, her mind and heart were just too full of storms made from resentment and bitterness that would not ease.

The next day, Shen Jiu followed closely behind her shizun as they entered the healing pavilion on Qian Cao Peak; she’d tried to refuse, but Shu Mingru had just laughed and told Shen Jiu she had no choice.

She picked at the strings on her vambraces; the disciple robes were comfortable, but they made her feel like she was playing a part in a play, wearing a skin that was never meant to be worn by someone like her.

But in all honesty, it didn’t matter at all if it felt unfitting, Shen Jiu was fiercely determined to fucking make it fit, it didn’t matter that she wasn’t born to play the part.

In the room they entered, a woman wearing simple brown robes with the sleeves tied back and glasses that were loosely hanging onto the bridge of her nose, she was reading something from some large scroll.

In the corner of the room, there was a young man with a mess of brown tangled hair wearing the same kind of brown robes as the woman, he was looking through a cupboard; Shen Jiu laxly observed how he (unsuccessfully) tried to hide his interest in who'd entered the room, his green eyes darting from what he was doing to her face every other second.

The woman looked up and smiled when her eyes landed on Shu Mingru. “Ah, Shu-shixiong, what brings you to Qian Cao today?” she asked cheerfully. “Another case of aphrodisiac poisoning? Shixiong should really stop keeping such flowers on his peak.”

Shu Mingru laughed politely before unceremoniously shoving Shen Jiu in the woman’s direction. “Aiyo, it’s not for me; my new little disciple needs a checkup,” he said mournfully, as if offended that this woman had dared to give him reasonable advice. “This master thought Yi-shimei might have something that could help the damage on her meridians.”

The woman nodded and got up from her seat, she smiled warmly at Shen Jiu and motioned for her to sit on one of the cots in the room. “Alright, if shizhi could give me her wrist?” she asked. Shen Jiu just undid the vambrace covering one of her wrists and let the woman take it in a firm hold.

Just like Shu Mingru had done the previous day, the woman— who Shen Jiu assumed was the Qian Cao Peak Lord— put two fingers on the wrist’s pulsepoint and started inspecting Shen Jiu’s meridians.

And just like Shen Jiu’s shizun, her face went through a range of different emotions before it settled on something that resembled pity. “There’s indeed some extensive damage; this master has some medicine that should help heal some of it, but I’m afraid a lot of it is too much to be dealt with through medicinal means.”

Shen Jiu frowned. “What does Yi-shishu mean?” she asked, trying to hide the sourness invading her tone. The peak lord smiled apologetically at her before turning and walking towards a cabinet stocked with bottles of pills and vials of medicine.

“What this master means is that some of the damage on shizhi’s spiritual root and meridians is..” she waved a hand in the air to convey something. “Well, it’s extensive, and because of your weak foundation it’s not possible to try and heal it right away, it’ll take time and much effort— many years of cultivating.”

Hearing the phrase “many years of cultivating” made Shen Jiu’s jaw tighten; she was already determined to prove to her master that she was going to manage to cultivate way past foundation establishment stage, and now she was going to have even more setbacks?

The heavens truly had their favorites, and Shen Jiu was very clearly not one of them.

Shen Jiu quickly re-tied the vambrace to her wrist and quietly (and sourly) muttered, “Thanking Yi-shishu for her enlightening guidance.”

Curse the enhanced hearing of cultivators, because Shu Mingru snorted loudly just as she’d finished saying it, and the other disciple in the room hid a shocked laugh by coughing behind his wide sleeve. But either Yi-shishu had somehow managed to either not hear her, or she’d just ignored the girl’s rude tone.

Shu Mingru glanced at his disciple over the top of his fan, his eyes were crinkled at the corners and Shen Jiu gave him a look. “Well, at least my little Jiu-er will eventually recover,” he said with barely hidden mocking. “Ah, Mingtao-shimei, do you have any of those spiritual herbs to boost one’s cultivation left?”

Yi Mingtao looked up from the bottle she’d been inspecting, one of her eyebrows raised in confusion. “Didn’t shixiong have a breakthrough just a month ago?” she asked while handing Shen Jiu one of the pills from the bottle she held. “Using such means to further one’s cultivation makes one more susceptible to qi-deviations, shixiong knows this.”

“Aiyo, who do you think I am? Huo-shidi?” the man said with a playful roll of his eyes. “It’s for my head disciple, Yi-shimei remembers A-Fei, doesn’t she?”

The healer sighed deeply and Shu Mingru laughed once more. “That girl– you spoil her far too much..” the healer said while massaging her temples. “Also, do me a favor and write your disciple’s name on the scroll over there, I like to keep count of all the new ones.”

Shen Jiu watched the pair interact while she swallowed the pill she’d been given. Her new shizun was seemingly very charismatic and (way too) talkative, but she knew that there was more to him than the surface showed. After she’d just quietly observed the peak lords for a while, Shu Mingru waved her over.

When she reached his side, the man shot a sharp grin down at her and handed Shen Jiu the ink and brush he’d been holding. “Write your name here, you never told this master the characters of it.”

She took the brush and looked down at the scroll, other newer disciples’ names and what peaks they belonged to stood written on it. Qing Jing Peak’s column was completely empty, Shen Jiu met her master’s intrigued gaze again before she started writing.

Her strokes weren’t the most elegant, she was very out of practice; most of the writing she’d been doing for the past year was on talismans, and those needed to be clear and consistent, not elegant and fancy.

The character of Shen was fairly easy to remember and quick to complete, but when she was about to write the character for Jiu she paused.

Being named after a number was more common among slaves. She wasn’t a slave anymore, and she did not want any-fucking-one to know she’d ever been one, but unfortunately she’d already told her new master that her name was Jiu, so she couldn’t just do a complete switch and write something else.

Shu Mingru let out an amused chuckle as she finished writing the second character. “Any chance your parents were fond of drinking?”*

Shen Jiu subtly rolled her eyes. “Something like that,” was her unamused reply. ‘He must think he’s so funny.’

She barely knew anything about her birth parents, all she knew was that they’d sold her to slave traders before she was even old enough to speak.

The other slaves had become her family, but now the only ones alive from her “batch” were her and—

…

Right, she’d momentarily forgotten that Yue Qi was dead as well. Shen Jiu was the only one left of the little “family” they’d had, everyone else had already been plucked off like flies one by one. Truly tragic.

Shu Mingru dried the writing on the scroll with his qi before rolling it up and handing it over to Yi Mingtao. “Me and Jiu-er will be going now, Yi-shimei,” he said while plucking some imaginary dust off his robes. “Unless there was anything else shimei wanted to inform Jiu-er of?”

Yi Mingtao scratched the tip of her nose for a few seconds. “Oh, right! Shen-shizhi," she exclaimed as she put the scroll into her sleeve. “This old woman forgot to mention; since shizhi’s base is fairly unstable, she should take extra care to meditate properly and be careful not to give in to heart demons.”

“Heart demons?” Shen Jiu echoed with a skeptical raise of her eyebrows; it sounded ridiculous.

“Demons of the heart; bad thoughts that could lead to a qi-deviation,” Shu Mingru says with a dismissive swish of his sleeve; as if what he’d said wasn’t something that was pretty important. “Excuse us, Mingtao-shimei, but this master and Jiu-er should really get going.”

Without letting either of the other two reply, Shu Mingru pulled Shen Jiu along by her shoulder and dragged her out of the healing pavilion, leaving Yi Mingtao feeling a bit confused, but she was fairly used to her martial brother’s strange behavior after so many decades.

Shen Jiu wrenched herself out of his grip as soon as they reached the start of the rainbow bridge. “What’s the hurry?” she asked dryly. “That sounded like pretty important information Yi-shishu was about to—”

“I have no time to sit and listen to her explain something that really isn’t that big of an issue,” the peak lord said with an inelegant roll of his eyes. It seemed his cheeriness had finally been turned down a notch. “This master will let Jiu-er do as she pleases; do not bother me unless it’s truly important.”

Then he summoned his spiritual sword— a beautiful snow white blade with green gems and carvings of wings adorning the area around the hilt— and stepped up onto the blade. He shot Shen Jiu one last inquisitive look before flying off in the direction of Qing Jing Peak, leaving his disciple behind in the dust.

Shen Jiu clenched her fists and scowled, now she’d be forced to walk alone all the way back to their peak again. What a fucking asshole.

Not that big an issue? The healer had said heart demons could lead to a qi-deviation— that sounded like a pretty big potential fucking issue!

Just as she was about to start walking back to Qing Jing Peak (and curse eight generations of Shu Mingru’s ancestors), Shen Jiu was blessed with the pleasure of hearing the voice belonging to the absolute last person she wanted to run into.

“Xiao Jiu?” Yue Qingyuan called from behind her, sounding pathetic just as before. She turned her head a bit so she’d be able to look at him; just as she’d suspected, he looked absolutely pathetic too.

All he needed was a pair of ears and a tail and the venerable Xuan Su Sword would look identical to a big sad dog that’d just been kicked in its stupid face.

Shen Jiu turned her head back so she wouldn’t be forced to look into his eyes any longer. She could hear Yue Qingyuan’s footsteps coming closer, apparently not understanding the clear message of “please go fuck yourself.”

A few more seconds and the man was now standing next to her, far too close. She scowled at him and just received another one of those sad dog-faced looks.

When it was clear he wasn’t going to stop ignoring the clear signs of her wanting to be left alone unless Shen Jiu literally hit him over the head with it, she snapped her head up to face him again and coldly said, “What does Yue-shixiong want from this shimei?”

Yue Qingyuan sighed tiredly and looked down towards the forests down below the rainbow bridges, once again avoiding to look Shen Jiu in the eyes. “How is Xiao Jiu settling in on Qing Jing Peak?”

Xiao Jiu. That damned name again. What was not getting drilled into his thick skull? Was he deliberately ignoring how she was purposely not responding to that name? What was he getting from this?

There was no one else around, the rainbow bridges were completely empty apart from them; of course Yue Qingyuan wouldn’t approach Shen Jiu if others were around to see it, she would for sure be a dirty stain on his pristine reputation if anyone knew what she knew.

“Why did you never come back for me?” Shen Jiu demanded. “Why did you leave me behind?”

Yue Qingyuan didn’t answer, in the corner of her eye she could see his clenched fists tremble for a split second, but his face remained neutral as he kept looking away into the distance.

Suffocating silence invaded the air between them, it was thick enough that you could cut it with a knife. Shen Jiu wanted to pick Yue Qingyuan up by his lapels and hold him over the edge of the rainbow bridge and demand that he give her a fucking answer.

Finally, after a silence that lasted for too long, Yue Qingyuan finally spoke, “I’m sorry; there’s no excuse for what I’ve done, Qi-ge is sorry, so very—”

A loud slap to his face shut him up immediately. Yue Qingyuan’s eyes were wide as he slowly reached up to touch the cheek that Shen Jiu had hit.

“Xiao Jiu..?”

“Just shut up!” Shen Jiu roared; the hand that had struck Yue Qingyuan trembled, she quickly hid it behind her back. “Is that all you know how to say? You left me to rot! And for what? To leave your dirty past behind? Are you ashamed of me, Yue Qingyuan!?” she spat his name with enough venom to kill a small child.

Yue Qingyuan just lowered his head, quietly taking her venomous words while looking just like an abused mutt being reprimanded by their master, if he had those damn ears they’d be pressed flat against his head.

“You really have nothing else to say to me? Then why did you even bring me here?!” she yelled as she threw her arms up in the air. “Why, Yue Qingyuan? If you’re just going to act ashamed of me, why did you insist on bringing me back with you!?”

“I wanted to make it up to you,” the pitiful man in front of her said quietly, still refusing to look at her.

Shen Jiu saw red. “The only way you can make it up to me is if you stop acting like a fucking coward and just tell me the damn truth you son of a—”

A hand on her shoulder stopped Shen Jiu’s next not very nice word. She turned her head at a neck-breaking speed to see who had the absolute balls to touch her. She was greeted by the disgustingly bright, fox-like smile of her new shizun.

Shu Mingru’s smile was knowing, she hated how laid bare she felt under his gaze. “Jiu-er, Yue-shizhi,” he said, his amused tone poorly hidden. “This master remembered that he needed to help Jiu-er with some beginner techniques; if Yue-shizhi would please excuse us, we’ll be heading back to Qing Jing Peak.”

Yue Qingyuan looked like he wanted to protest, but he obviously didn’t have the authority to go against his shibo. So instead of saying anything he just cupped his hands, nodded at the peak lord, and walked away.

(Shen Jiu tried to ignore the stabbing pain in her chest when she saw just how easily he left.)

Clicking his tongue, Shu Mingru started walking towards his peak. “Jiu-er really feels no fear, hitting and scolding the future sect leader like he’s an unruly child,” he said without looking at her. “This master is intrigued, just what is the truth Jiu-er seeks?”

‘Why don’t you mind your own fucking business’ Was what Shen Jiu wanted to— but didn’t— say. “Nothing that Shizun needs to worry about,” she said instead, making sure her tone was warning enough for him not to pry further.

Luckily for her, it seemed like his interest was not large enough to put the effort in to ask more questions, instead he just chuckled and patted her shoulder. She scowled at the point of contact until he let go.

This man was going to either be a valuable asset to getting what she wanted, or just a huge waste of time.

Chapter Text

The next four months were nothing of note, and Shen Jiu saw neither hide nor hair of her shizun. It wasn’t that Shu Mingru was off the peak, he just didn’t seek her out, and he apparently had a talent for being impossible to find unless he wanted you to.

For the first month or two, a lot of the other disciples had followed her around and tried to either see what exactly it was with her that their peak lord had found so interesting, or they just had wanted to boast and show off their own mediocrity.

Shen Jiu didn’t pay them any attention, she simply stayed focused on working on her cultivation alone, refusing the help of anyone; who knew if their motives were truly innocent or if they just wanted to ruin her even further?

Eventually everyone realized that she wasn’t some sixteen year old once-in-a-generation talent that in four months could cultivate a nascent soul from nothing; she was just a sixteen year old with a laughably weak base and severely damaged cultivation, and they stopped bothering her excessively.

She didn’t see her shizun, and she received no visits from Yue Qingyuan, which she wasn’t as bothered by; that pitiful face of his still filled her with unbridled fury, and even if he did show his face it would just end with her boiling over and throwing him off the peak.

But there was a weak part of her that still wished he’d at least try. She quickly made sure to crush that childish wish; Yue Qingyuan had abandoned her, he was a traitor and a coward who was ashamed of her, he only took her to the sect because he pitied her.

She didn’t need him at all.

Her cultivation had improved pathetically, even though it had been four months since she’d started she could still not do all the basic techniques that she wanted. All the manuals talked about “clearing the mind, heart, and soul” and “being in tune with yourself.”

Yeah right, easier said than done.

She did everything, excessive meditation and calming techniques, practicing sword forms, circulating and regulating her qi. Sure, Shen Jiu could see some small improvements; her body became sturdier and could take a lot more work before it’s energy was exhausted, her spiritual root had become the tiniest bit stronger; it was still nowhere near enough.

But Shen Jiu had never been one to give up, every time she failed something she’d try and try and try again until she perfected it, and this would be no different. She would become an immortal master, it didn’t matter how long it would take.

The sun was high in the sky, covering Qing Jing Peak’s lush greenery with a lovely, glowing veil of sunshine. The peak that was usually so quiet was unusually crowded and not so quiet, for on this particular day Peak Lord Shu was not on the mountain.

The immortal master had been called to handle a diplomatic dispute between a couple of sects in the south; usually Cang Qiong Mountain wouldn't send him for such petty infighting, but this particular dispute could become a problem for the Immortal Alliance.

So Sect Leader Song had sent the best negotiator of their sect out to handle it, which happened to be the Qing Jing Peak Lord.

The evening before Shu Mingru had left the peak, he left everything in the hands of his head disciple, assuring everyone she was perfectly capable. Chen Fei had clung to his empty words of praise like a flower seeking the rays of sunlight.

Shen Jiu had watched the display with barely contained disgust; Chen Fei worshiped the ground their master walked on, it was a sickening sight.

The first Chen Fei had done with her “temporary peak lord position,” as she called it, was to invite disciples from other peaks to lectures and lessons on their peak. Shu Mingru had placed strict restrictions on others visiting, for he was not fond of too much noise.

Chen Fei argued that since he wasn’t there, then he couldn’t be angry at the noise (it was a child’s way of thinking, if you asked for Shen Jiu’s opinion).

So now the calm and quiet peak had turned into the chattering and overcrowded peak; everywhere you turned there’d be noise, there was not a single place on the peak that was quiet enough to meditate.

It angered Shen Jiu beyond belief, not because their master’s rules and regulations were disobeyed— she couldn’t give less of a shit about that— but because you’d need to wake up before mao shi if you wanted to be able to hear your own thoughts!

As soon as it was allowed, disciples from Xian Shu, Zui Xian, Qian Cao, and unfortunately Bai Zhan fluttered over to Qing Jing Peak to get ahold of the peak’s scholarly secrets, or see their friends, mostly the latter.

It was beyond frustrating. Shen Jiu had been running on pure spite for the past few days that their shizun had been away; every day she prayed for heavenly lightning to just strike down and swiftly end her life.

This day was the second to last day before Shu Mingru was meant to come back to the sect, there were less people from other peaks visiting, but the noise was still migraine-inducing, and Shen Jiu was not happy.

She’d woken up just after yin shi, at that time the peak’s kitchen staff wasn’t even awake and so there was no food up for grabs; after a while of rummaging through the empty kitchens Shen Jiu had found a single stale meatbun, and that had been her breakfast.

It was midday, and she had refused to torment her poor ears by entering the dining hall while all the visiting disciples were still there, deciding to not have her eardrums to die a painful death.

She instead just decided to do what she’d been doing for the past week: wait until everyone had gone to sleep and then sneak into the kitchens to find leftovers she could borrow. A foolproof plan.

Shen Jiu was diligently studying a more advanced cultivation manual under the shade of a tree; she’d stolen it from one of the oldest female disciples that she’d been forced to share a room with. It was one that she was sure that the woman had already finished and didn’t need, it wasn’t that advanced if you had a good grasp on your cultivation already.

As she read through the manual, she could feel someone looking at her; the prickling sensation in her neck never lied to her before, but she was too busy to care. She was reading and had no time or want to entertain some arrogant disciples that thought they were worthy of her time simply because they existed.

Unfortunately, the heavens decided to decline her request for a heavenly lightning to strike her down, and instead decided to send down a pack of dogs to gnaw at her ankles instead.

A few zhang away, a pack of male Qing Jing disciples stood huddled together, led by one of the oldest and most arrogant of the male disciples, Wu Delun.

During the four months that Shen Jiu had been on Qing Jing Peak, she had garnered a few admirers; they'd been drawn to her beautiful exterior, not her nasty personality, obviously.

Wu Delun was one of these admirers (even though he was well into adulthood and Shen Jiu just barely over sixteen), and he was convinced that he could easily win her affections; he had not experienced much rejection from maidens in his life.

But he had never once spoken to Shen Jiu, if he had he’d have known that he was of the type of person she hated most: an arrogant, entitled man.

The mutt and his pack stalked toward where Shen Jiu was sitting. She could hear the sound of grass being crumpled underneath several pairs of heavy boots and immediately shut the manual; she was not in the mood to deal with a pack of entitled dogs.

Unfortunately, the pack managed to reach Shen Jiu before she managed to start running in the direction of the library.

“Shen-shimei,” Wu Delun greeted, his tone dripping with pretend sweetness; it disgusted her. “This shixiong saw you sitting here all alone and wondered if shimei would like to join this one for food?”

Shen Jiu got up on her feet and stared up at him with the coldest glare she could manage. “This shimei must disappoint Wu-shixiong, for she has no intention of joining him or his companions to eat.”

The group of disciples behind Wu Delun that had been whispering between each other until then stopped immediately; it was the first time any of the girls of Qing Jing Peak had looked at their shixiong like he was merely a dirty stain on her boot.

Wu Delun let out a strained chuckle, obviously not pleased with Shen Jiu’s answer. “Shen-shimei, don’t be like that,” he said, leaning closer and closer to Shen Jiu with every word. “This shixiong simply wants to know his shimei better, won’t she grant this one the honor?”

Shen Jiu stepped back, her expression colder than the harshest of winters. “This one gave you an answer already,” she snapped and turned away. “Maybe Wu-shixiong should read a book on how to handle rejection, it would surely help him a lot.”

Gritting his teeth, Wu Delun sneered as Shen Jiu began walking away from him. Going against what would be considered proper etiquette, the man angrily stormed forward and grabbed Shen Jiu’s wrist in a bruising grip.

Stopping dead in her tracks, Shen Jiu turned her head to stare up at him. Her blood had already been boiling beforehand, and the second the man had placed his dirty hand on her, he’d begun begging for death.

Wu Delun tugged her towards him, arrogantly smirking down at what he foolishly thought was easy prey. “Shen-shimei,” he drawled, his voice more impatient than it’d been before. “It’s rude to speak to your seniors like that; hasn’t Shizun gone through ‘Qing Jing’s Rules and Etiquette’ with you yet?”

Shen Jiu stared down at the hand that was clamped down around her wrist. She looked up at the repulsing man through her lashes; Wu Delun was too arrogant, someone needed to knock him down a peg, or ten.

“This one suggests shixiong removes his hand, lest he wants to lose the ability to breathe painlessly,” Shen Jiu warned; it wasn't something she said just to intimidate him, she meant it wholeheartedly.

Unfortunately, it seemed no one had bothered to teach the dog how to heed commands, because Wu Delun just smirked and pulled Shen Jiu towards him again. “You know, Da-shijie was right about you,” he said, not paying attention to the vast amount of killing intent that was radiating from the girl he was grabbing.

He continued, “You’re just Shizun’s bed-warmer, that’s the only way a mannerless bitch like you was allowed to join Cang Qiong Moun—“

Wu Delun’s sentence was cut off abruptly as Shen Jiu stabbed a sharpened stick right into his thigh. He immediately let go of her with a pained cry and lost his balance, he tumbled down into the grass and clutched the place where he’d been stabbed.

The rest of his entourage all watched with wide eyes and trembling hands as their youngest shimei started launching vicious kicks to their leader’s ribs and face, making him howl louder and writhe around in pain.

It had been a while since Shen Jiu really got to relish in the lovely feeling of causing someone harm; she couldn’t help the satisfied smile that formed on her face when she saw that the grass where Wu Delun was laying had been stained red with blood.

‘Should’ve kept his idiotic mouth shut and his dirty hands to himself,’ Shen Jiu thought as she pulled the stick out of his thigh only to stab it into his hand, nailing it into the ground. This made the pathetic mongrel cry even louder.

“Not so confident now, are we?” Shen Jiu said as she stepped on his bleeding hand, the man let out a choked sob and coughed up a mouthful of blood onto her white boots in response.

So much loud barking only for him to turn into a whimpering mess the second another dog bites back.

Pathetic.

But just as Shen Jiu was about to launch another kick at him, someone hit her in with a blast of qi and sent her flying into a nearby tree. Shen Jiu hit the trunk with a loud crack; she wasn’t sure if it was the tree or her bones that had splintered.

When she opened her eyes she suddenly became aware of the audience that their “brawl” had garnered. Other disciples— from Qing Jing and from other peaks that were visiting— had gathered nearby and had watched in silent horror as a crazed Shen Jiu beat her shixiong to a bloody pulp.

“Shen Jiu!” Chen Fei’s outraged voice made Shen Jiu look up. The woman was standing in front of her with a furious expression on her pretty face.

“What do you think you’re doing? Attacking your martial siblings is not allowed on our peak!”

Shen Jiu smiled up at her; a couple of disciples who had a clear view of her face shivered at how frosty her “smile” was. “Da-shijie, this one was simply holding true to a promise; Wu-shixiong has only himself to blame since he ignored this one’s warning.”

Chen Fei aggressively pulled Shen Jiu up on her feet and held the younger girl by the lapels of her robes, she stared furiously into Shen Jiu’s eyes for a moment before suddenly breaking out into a sharp smile.

“It seems that Shen-shimei still has not fully comprehended the rules that disciples of Qing Jing Peak must heed,” said Chen Fei. “This shijie will be following Shen- shimei to the punishment hall; disrespecting and attacking your seniors is not something that’s taken lightly on this peak.”

Shen Jiu snorted coldly. “Shouldn’t Shizun be the one to make that decision, he’s the peak lord, is he not?” she asked amusedly, doing nothing to hide how good she was feeling after putting that filthy dog in its place.

The woman didn’t respond, she just kept dragging Shen Jiu towards the punishment hall, so Shen Jiu continued, “If this one recalls correctly, Da-shijie doesn’t have the authority to administer such punishments, even if she is the current head disciple.”

“Current head disciple; as if Shizun would ever pick another,” Chen Fei said with a cocky grin. “I will be a peak lord one day, I have whatever authority I so desire, and Shizun is not here right now, is he?”

After being dragged by Chen Fei across the whole peak, she was made to kneel in the punishment hall; other disciples watched with morbid interest as an elder had the cane readied behind Shen Jiu and then commanded for her to be struck.

It had been decided by Chen Fei and a few of the elders of Qing Jing Peak that Shen Jiu would receive 20 strokes for disrespecting and then attacking one of her seniors; all the cowardly worms that Wu Delun had brought said that Shen Jiu had attacked the man out of nowhere, they surprisingly mentioned nothing of their leader’s provoking or Shen Jiu’s clear warning.

It wasn’t Shen Jiu’s first time being hit in such a manner; the elder administering the strokes was not nearly strong enough to make it truly hurt, so it was practically nothing.

The first stroke did hurt, but she was just out of practice, after that it was as easy to handle as a simple punch; her cultivation making her body stronger meant that she could take way more strikes than when she was still a slave in the Qiu household.

Qiu Jianluo had been a teenager when he had beaten her like this, but he had been much stronger than this elder. What a disappointment; if you’re going to hit disciples as punishment, at least do it properly.

After all the 20 strokes were done, Shen Jiu simply stood up, bowed to the elder and Chen Fei (who’d been watching with a smile the whole time), and then walked out of the hall and towards the rainbow bridges.

Walking didn’t hurt as much as it used to after similar beatings, thank the heavens for her cultivation strengthening her body, even though both things were still pathetic compared to everyone else.

But even though her body could take more, the bruises that she could feel were forming burned slightly when she moved her arms. Annoying, sure, but it wasn’t anything that some healing salve couldn’t numb.

As she walked up the stairs that led to Qian Cao Peak’s healing pavilion, she couldn’t help but smile triumphantly. Even though she’d been punished, she’d gotten to see the terrified look on the mongrel’s face as she beat him within an inch of his life; it was more than worth the strokes she’d received.

And well, Shen Jiu would make sure Chen Fei regretted her decision to humiliate her at a later date.

She entered the mostly empty building, the only ones that were inside were a group of newer disciples being instructed by a senior, one disciple dragging another to the direction of the infirmary, and one nervous young man biting his lip while reading from a scroll.

Shen Jiu recognized the young man as the disciple that had hovered around the room when she was being examined by the Qian Cao Peak Lord; she’d heard from someone that his name was Mu Wang, or was it Mu Wei? …Anyway. Mu-whatever was Yi Mingtao’s head disciple, she was pretty sure she correctly remembered that much about him at least.

She walked up behind him without making a sound, making the poor thing nearly jump out of his skin when she cleared her throat and made her presence known.

“Who—!” Mu-whatever exclaimed as he jumped back, nearly dropping the scroll he’d been reading. At first he looked irritated, but then his eyes landed on Shen Jiu’s face and he relaxed, unusual. “Oh, Shen-shijie? Did shijie need something from this shidi?”

Shen Jiu sniffed amusedly at the complete turn-around in demeanor. “This one is in need of healing salve for bruising; Mu-shidi should be able to provide this one with what she needs, yes?”

Mu-whatever instinctively looked her up and down, scanning for any visible injuries. “This shidi can provide, of course; if shijie would please come along?”

Seeing Shen Jiu nod in agreement, Mu-whatever led her to a room that looked a lot like the one she’d been in the last time she visited Qian Cao Peak. The only reason she knew it was not the same room was because the amount of bottles and vials that this room had was nothing compared to the other one.

That, and the other room was actually organized.

She looked around the room, observing the different plants and books that laid strewn around everywhere. “Is this Mu-shidi’s room?” she asked while reaching out to touch one of the more demure-looking flowers.

“Ah— shijie shouldn’t touch that, it’s a very potent aphrodisiac,” the other said, making Shen Jiu retract her hand quicker than lightning. “And yes, this room is this shidi’s personal office, you get a good few privileges as head disciple.”

‘Why would you keep that in your office? And yeah, no shit you do; does shidi use his authority to beat his martial siblings into submission as well?’ Shen Jiu thought to herself, but didn’t say any of it aloud; Mu-shidi didn’t seem the type to actually do that.

“What is shidi’s name?” Shen Jiu asked. “This one only remembers Mu-shidi's surname, apologies.”

The man chuckled as he opened one of the cupboards, he didn’t seem offended that she’d forgotten— that’s good, probably. “This one’s name is Mu Anwei, and shijie’s name is Shen Jiu, yes?” he asked with a smile.

Shen Jiu nodded before looking away again.

Since she’d gotten to the peaks, no one had acted like a normal person around her. Her shizun was a nutcase and mostly ignored her, Yue Qingyuan was… (she didn’t even want to think of him really) ..a coward, and the disciples on Qing Jing Peak were either spineless little cowards or pompous peacocks.

After a little while of Mu Anwei digging through his cabinets and muttering curses at how unorganized everything was (courtesy of himself), he found the specific salve he’d been looking for.

Apparently he’d put them in the back because one of the younger disciples had accidentally mistaken it for something else because of its container, and then made a huge mess of a patient’s heart disease.

Mu Anwei handed Shen Jiu the jar with a kind smile; she opened the jar and was instantly hit with a smell that invoked both nostalgia and pain at the same time.

It smelled like haitang trees. Her brows furrowed unconsciously as she inhaled more of the familiar scent; the trees that had grown in Qiu Haitang’s courtyard at the Qiu estate smelled just like that.

…

Bury that. Those days were dead; good riddance.

…

Mu Anwei apparently misunderstood what the change in her expression meant. “Does shijie need this one’s help applying it? Where is the bruising?” he asked while looking at her intently, as if to see if he could somehow see through her robes and find where the bruises resided just by staring hard enough.

Shen Jiu thought about it for a moment, it would be a pain in the ass to apply herself; she had been considering going to the Warm Red Pavilion and asking one of the ladies there to help her, but she still didn’t have a sword to fly there with.

Moving her arms wasn’t pleasant, and the affected area was her back… eugh.

It seemed like she’d need to swallow her pride for once, luckily it wasn’t in front of any real threat. For some strange, inexplicable, definitely foolish reason, she decided to “trust” Mu Anwei, at least with this.

“It’s on my back,” she replied stiffly. “This one.. humbly requests Mu-shidi’s assistance to apply it.”

It was a lot harder to ask for help than she’d thought it’d be, she’d barely managed to un-grit her teeth so she’d be able to actually ask.

Luckily, Mu Anwei didn’t comment on her behavior and simply instructed her to kneel by the table and take off the clothes covering her back so he could help.

He might not have nefarious intentions; like with her shizun, she had reluctantly accepted that there were a few men whose presence didn’t necessarily make her hands beg to be allowed to castrate them.

But it still didn’t feel good. She dug her nails into her palms until she felt the familiar feeling of blood drops forming from the small wounds; grounding, but it still felt vile. The last time she’d done anything like this near a man was… —not something she was going to spend even a single precious second thinking about.

So just like with the familiar smell of haitang trees, she buried it in the mass grave that resided behind her ribcage; she buried it alongside Xiao Jiu.

“I’m done,” Shen Jiu announced; she felt stripped bare, and not just because of the fact part of her literally was. The Qiu brand on her lower back wasn’t visible like this, and her old scars were probably hidden by the new bruising and hopefully wouldn’t attract as much attention, but it was nerve wracking.

Mu Anwei walked over and picked up the jar of salve from where Shen Jiu had placed it on the floor, and then kneeled down behind her. She could hear him suck in a sharp breath as he presumably saw the damage; Shen Jiu hadn’t seen it herself, so she couldn’t say if it was an appropriate reaction or not.

“You— shijie, what happened?” the head disciple asked with an unfamiliar tone in his voice. “Did Shu-shibo..?”

Shen Jiu looked at him over her shoulder, ignoring the burning itch in the bruises as she moved. Mu Anwei’s face had a strange emotion on it, one she could not name. “This one attacked her martial brother; the punishment was administered by the head disciple.”

Mu Anwei’s eyes widened with shock, but he stayed silent until he’d gotten the jar opened and taken some of the salve on his fingers. “This might burn a little, shijie..” he warned. “Chen-shijie doesn’t have the authority to do that; and this one believes Shen-shijie didn’t do it without a good reason.”

She bit back a wince as his fingers touched her back, it did burn quite a bit, but it wasn’t unbearable.

He sounded so confident in his assessment; Mu Anwei didn’t even know her, they’d been in the same room only once before, how could he sound so certain?

Shen Jiu just shook her head, trying to distract from the feeling of bile rising in her throat. “It doesn't matter.”

The young healer’s hand stopped for a second before continuing to spread the ointment across her back.

“It does, shijie,” Mu Anwei said firmly.

“I attacked him, I could’ve killed him, and I don't regret it at all,” Shen Jiu snapped; it didn’t matter that she had no regrets, she wouldn’t pretend that she was an innocent person who got punished for nothing. “And the best way to get people to respect the rules is to beat it into them, is it not?”

Mu Anwei didn’t reply to that, he just sighed softly and continued to gently apply salve to her bruises. She could already feel the effects, the pain was numbing, the smell invaded her nostrils and made her feel a bit lost, she quickly shook herself out of it.

She’d never been able to understand people who dedicated their lives to healing and helping people, people like Mu-shidi perplexed her to no end; was doing what they did really that satisfying?

People like him were the ones that would spit on her personal mantra the most if she would ever bother to share it; they cared because they wanted to, because it was ‘the right thing to do’, but why did they want that?

Eventually he stopped touching her, Shen Jiu did not breathe a sigh of relief when his hands finally left the proximity of her skin. “Is shidi done?” she asked coldly; she wanted to get out of there and continue doing what she’d been doing before that annoying mongrel and his flies had interrupted.

“Yes, it’s completely done,” Mu Anwei said with a tired tone present in his voice. “The bruises should be gone by nightfall, and the pain should disappear completely in an incense time.”

Shen Jiu quickly dressed and stood up, she nodded stiffly at Mu Anwei before turning to leave the office. But before she could close the door she heard the man say: “If shijie ever needs this kind of help again, this shidi would be happy to provide it.”

She didn’t reply and just slammed the door shut behind her. Shen Jiu left the healing pavilion quickly, she did not run down the steps of the peak to reach the rainbow bridges, but it wasn’t far from it.

What did he mean by that? Did Mu Anwei really think that just because she was incapable of going to anyone else to get them to ‘help’ her, she’d be coming crying to him every single time the other disciples treated her like shit?

Pei pei, she didn’t need his pity. She’d never had to rely on anyone else before, and it wouldn’t be good to start getting into the habit of relying on others now.

Relying on others just meant that you were weak; caring about people made you weak, it just gave other people more things to potentially hurt you with.

That night Shen Jiu stood on the roof of the dormitories alone, her training sword in hand and the manual she’d stolen from one of her seniors’ belongings.

She’d made progress for these past few months, but it was nowhere near enough; if she was going to prove to everyone that she was more than a dirty former slave, and not a lazy good-for-nothing that had been permitted to enter Qing Jing Peak by sharing a bed with their shizun— she had to work even harder.

Forget working ten times harder, if she was going to prove anything to those dogs, she needed to work a thousand times harder than she already was.

Shen Jiu would get what she wanted, she refused to take anything less than.

The cots in Qian Cao Peak weren’t comfortable; or maybe they were, Shen Jiu’s body and mind hurt too much to really tell anymore. Her half-closed eyes darted around, she could see a brown shadow moving around the room with the grace of a python rhinoceros— a Qian Cao disciple most likely.

It had been four days since Shen Jiu and Wu Delun’s “scuffle,” three days since Shen Jiu woke up in Qian Cao Peak’s healing pavilion after pushing her body too far too quickly, and two days since Peak Lord Shu Mingru returned to the mountain.

Speak of the devil; the door to the room was pushed open with a loud wail and an elegant figure in green entered, ordering the brown shadow to leave so he could have a little alone chat with his precious disciple.

Unlike how Yi Mingtao had looked when Shen Jiu was brought to her peak, Shu Mingru’s face held not a single drop of worry or pity; like always, his expression was one of amusement and intrigue, sick fucker.

The peak lord waltzed over to the side of the cot Shen Jiu was occupying, his billowing green sleeves fluttering around him like an overgrown green butterfly.

He clicked his tongue as he pulled Shen Jiu’s numb wrist up in a lazy grip to inspect her meridians. “Jiu-er, Jiu-er, what shall I do with you,” he tutted with a theatrical tone. “This master leaves the peak for a week, and his disciple causes all this noisy trouble.”

She summoned all her strength so she could glare viciously at him; Shu Mingru just chuckled and patted her head like one would with a puppy. “Aiyo, didn’t the little viper listen to her shishu the last time we were here?” he said with a foxy grin. “Jiu-er is fragile, she is unusually susceptible to qi-deviations.”

‘Maybe I wouldn’t have done it if you didn’t wave off my concern and leave me unprepared, you damn fox! And who the hell are you calling fragile!?’

Shen Jiu’s glare persisted. “That was a qi-deviation?”

Shu Mingru caressed her cheek with a sharp nail, nearly pressing hard enough to draw blood, she recoiled from his touch in disgust. “Yes, Jiu-er has never experienced one before, right?” the man asked cryptically as he sat down on the bed. “Tell me, how did it feel? Describe it to your master.”

(It felt like her tendons were going to snap, the blood in her veins felt like liquid fire, her heart and soul felt like they were going to rip her apart from the inside..

She couldn’t breathe. Her entire body felt like it was going to fall apart at any moment, her unwilling tears felt like acid on her skin.)

She shrugged, ignoring the urge to wince as she moved her shoulders. “It wasn’t anything special.”

That coaxed a barking laugh out of the man. Shu Mingru eyed her with amusement from behind his fan as he collected himself. “This master also heard Jiu-er had a bit of a violent run-in with a fellow disciple,” he said; Shen Jiu stiffened. “Is that anything Jiu-er would like to tell this master about?”

Shen Jiu smiled coldly. “I don’t regret anything; it’s as I said to Da-shijie, he should’ve kept his hands to himself.”

Nodding in agreement, Shu Mingru started inspecting his nails. “Wu Delun is shameless and bullheaded,” he let out an exaggerated sigh. “This humble master wonders where he went wrong with that one.”

Shen Jiu snorted; this man was just as shameless, he just wasn’t a filthy dog who felt entitled to a girl’s attention just for gracing the world with his waste of a birth; the master was scummy in other ways.

“Will this disciple still be able to cultivate?” Shen Jiu asked, trying her best to seem apathetic towards the possibility of receiving a negative answer.

Shu Mingru dropped his overzealous mask and slipped into something more dulled down, his smile was more calculating rather than amused. “Jiu-er will have to slow down, but she will be able to continue cultivating. What has made Jiu-er act so rashly? Things like that take much time, hurrying too fast will only end up with you dead at the foot of the mountain.”

Shen Jiu picked at the hems of her sleeves. “This disciple was irresponsible, begging Shizun’s pardon.”

“Granted; Jiu-er has potential, but maybe she should put more effort into studying the peak’s more intricate and theoretical sides while she lets her body rest.”

Then the peak lord stood up and walked out of the room without sparing his disciple a last glance.

Gritting her teeth, Shen Jiu clenched her fists until her nails were close to drawing blood from her palms. The storm in her heart was a mix of anger and envy.

It wasn’t fair, why did Yue Qingyuan have it so easy? They were from the same background, he was her age when he got here, but he seemed to get to where he was with ease; the incredible Xuan Su Sword, power oozes from his every breath.

The heavens had their favorites, but why couldn’t Shen Jiu be one of them? Just a single drop of favor— even half a drop would be enough; she just wanted to live.

Letting her gaze flicker down at the foot of the cot, she found that there was a book that hadn’t been there before. Ignoring the soreness in her muscles, Shen Jiu crawled forward on the bed and picked the book up. It was a book on strategy.

Hm. Was this what her shizun had been referring to? Qing Jing Peak was a peak of scholars, being a master of the 4 arts was essential if you wanted to get even the smallest chance to become the peak lord.

A decision was made, if she couldn’t hurry her cultivation progress by working as hard as she’d done, then she would just have to focus on developing her skills in those subjects instead; she was already familiar with qin, she had basic knowledge of calligraphy, but the other two— painting and weiqi— she would need to learn from scratch.

Determined, Shen Jiu opened the book the peak lord had left for her and began reading; these skills were just as important as being a good cultivator on the peak of scholars, a fool who had no brains and only knew how to swing a sword had no business on it.

(A day later, she received a letter from Yue Qingyuan in the form of a paper bird that flew in through the healing pavilion’s window; she managed to read less than six characters before incinerating it.)

Chapter Text

It had been a month since Shen Jiu was cleared to leave Qian Cao and go back to Qing Jing; as expected, many of her fellow disciples were not happy with her return. Shen Jiu would need around three extra pairs of hands to count every angry glare she’d received since she’d returned, and most of them came from Chen Fei.

The head disciple was the most bitter, she’d been hoping that their shizun would finally realize that the talentless child he’d taken in was nothing more than a wild beast waiting to pounce, but the peak lord hadn’t been upset with Shen Jiu’s behavior at all.

In fact, after Shen Jiu returned to the peak, Shu Mingru had begun gracing her with his favor publicly, she was now known as his most favored disciple, the title that had previously been Chen Fei’s to hold.

Shen Jiu did not know what the old man was planning; she'd realized soon after meeting him that he was always planning seven steps ahead. The man was as confusing as the art of painting— and just as annoying.

The Qing Jing Peak Lord’s residence was always quiet, it was hidden away from the rest of the residents of the peak, not a single giggle or music note could reach into the house. It was situated perfectly, when the moon rose its light would illuminate the study beautifully.

The peak lord’s study looked ghostly in the pale moonlight that slipped in through the window, Shu Mingru and Shen Jiu were both sitting by the kneeling desk and savoring a cup of herbal tea. The only sound in the room was the quiet whispering of the moonlight cardinals that lived in the lush garden outside.

Eventually the master decided to break the silence, he swirled the little liquid that was still left in his cup and said, “This master has some advice for his disciple, if Jiu-er would lend this master an ear.”

Shen Jiu put her cup down and looked up; her shizun had a way of letting her know when he wanted to be serious without saying it, he did it by using his eyes.

Whether it was intentional or not she didn’t know.

Normally, his bright golden eyes were near permanently crinkled at the corners, he smiled all the time, but none of those smiles were actually genuine, Shen Jiu had realized.

When he was serious, he’d let his eyes drop and then his face would look like he’d never smiled once in his life. His usually so bright eyes turned cold, far-away, like two abysses of golden emptiness.

“This disciple is listening dutifully.”

Shu Mingru smiled, but it was not clear which emotion was playing through his mind. “Jiu-er has serious problems with her temper,” he stated bluntly; if it were anyone else saying it then Shen Jiu’s temper would immediately flare up and prove them right.

He continued: “This master would like for Jiu-er to tame it; getting as angry about things as you do only shows that you care.”

Shen Jiu tilted her head in slight confusion, still feeling mildly offended. “What does Shizun advise that this disciple do, then?”

Anger was her default, it was an emotion that she had been an expert in knowing how to feel all her life. To all of a sudden switch to something else seemed difficult.

The peak lord rested his chin in his hand and Shen Jiu leaned back on her palms. Neither of them were being proper, but there was no one in the study but them, so they didn’t care.

“Cutting someone down using one’s words is far more satisfying than using one’s sword,” Shu Mingru stated, it sounded like he was speaking from experience. “Hiding your true feelings is a good skill to have if you want to be good at getting what you want.”

Nodding, Shen Jiu thought about his words. It was fairly similar to the way she felt about relying on or caring about others, if you showed that you cared for someone, then other people could exploit that care to hurt or use you.

“But how would this disciple go about hiding that? This one begs for Shizun’s guidance.”

“Think of it like this: you wear a mask of complete apathy around others,” the peak lord said, his empty gaze staring holes through Shen Jiu. “No matter how much their words might ignite your fury, let it roll off you like water off a duck’s back. Hiding your anger and intentions might prove useful to you.”

Shen Jiu snorted. “It sounds easier said than done; is it presumptuous to assume that Shizun is a master of this technique?”

If anyone else could hear how she spoke to her teacher, they’d spit gallons of blood.

A bit of mirth returned to Shu Mingru’s eyes as he rolled them while folding and unfolding a fan in his hand. “Such nerve, I should have you prostrating on the ground for three shichen for daring to insinuate that this master is anything but genuine.”

Mirroring his eye roll, Shen Jiu leaned forward to lean her elbows on the table. “Will using this technique really work?” she asked skeptically. “What happens when the cauldron overflows?”

Shu Mingru just smiled and didn’t give her an answer.

Under Shu Mingru’s actual guidance, Shen Jiu’s improvement is more noticeable. The next year was filled with diligent training in the 4 arts, calm and careful cultivating to avoid further incidents, and many, many sleepless nights of even more studying.

At first Shen Jiu wondered where her shizun got all his newfound time to teach her from, but then she realized that he’d been deliberately avoiding teaching her the first four months. Why? Only the heavens know.

The lord of Qing Jing Peak was a unique teacher; he liked pointing out mistakes she’d made and laughed at them before actually nudging her in the right direction.

But even though his teaching techniques bordered on petty at times, Shen Jiu could feel that she improved much faster than she’d done on her own.

Her spiritual root was weak because of the damage she’d sustained during her time with Wu Yanzi, and her base was weak because of her late start, but she slowly but surely started to go somewhere.

The progress she makes in the arts is much more remarkable; already having learned how to play the guqin a little bit from the musicians at the brothel, Shen Jiu picked up the techniques of qin easily, the same with calligraphy— the hardest thing there was learning to not put her sleeves in the fresh ink.

Strategy wasn’t that hard to learn either, but she never managed to win in weiqi against her teacher, but he was also over a hundred years old, so it wasn’t as humiliating as it could’ve been.

Painting was a bit harder to learn, it required a lot of patience that Shen Jiu didn’t really have at first, but eventually her skills became passable.

But all good things must have some bad sides; being graced with Shu Mingru’s favor and her avoiding further punishment after nearly killing someone caused more people to speculate about the true nature of the relationship between the master and disciple.

Paired with her late start in cultivation and already nasty reputation, people started spreading rumors that Shen Jiu had seduced and slept with their shizun to join Qing Jing Peak and gain Shu Mingru’s favor.

Every time she caught wind of a rumor like that going around she had to forcefully swallow the blood and bile that threatened to escape from her mouth.

The idea of ever touching or being touched by that man— or any man for that matter— in that manner filled her with pure and utter disgust; but she kept it down, keeping the cauldron closed and ignoring the boiling anger.

Her scuffle with the mongrel Wu Delun also left her without a place to sleep, since the other women in the dormitories stated that they didn’t feel safe sharing a space with someone like her.

But it wasn’t like Shen Jiu liked it there, she was never at peace when sleeping there anyway.

The woodshed became her new residence; the ground wasn’t comfortable, but compared to where she’d slept before in her life, it was as good as a real bed.

Sometimes she’d accidentally fall asleep in the side room of her shizun’s house, but this only happened when he’d pushed her too far in their lessons and she collapsed from exhaustion. Those nights she was plagued by vicious nightmares of autumn.

Nearly every night in the woodshed, Shen Jiu would fall asleep cursing Yue Qingyuan for taking her to the sect; she missed her friends at the Warm Red Pavilion dearly, even if she had a hard time admitting it at first.

But Shen Jiu promised herself that as soon as she’d cultivated enough to receive her own spiritual sword from Wan Jian Peak, the first place she’d visit would be the brothel. She’d make sure they knew she wasn’t dead, and then she’d finally be able to sleep well in their arms once again.

Adapting to Shu Mingru’s advice was a lot easier than she’d expected, she took to the cold and apathetic persona better than she’d thought; the anger still flared many times a day, but she’d gotten better at bottling it up, and she’d further developed a sharp tongue that was surprisingly reliable and comfortable to have.

Unfortunately, much of her progress in that area would be thrown into the abyss following the Twelve Peaks’ annual martial arts tournament.

The sun was high in the sky and heated Shen Jiu’s skin uncomfortably. The Qing Jing Peak Lord had informed her a bit too late that he’d be bringing her along to the peaks’ annual tournament to represent their peak in the competitions, so she hadn’t had time to change into her actual training robes.

“Shizun,” she began, eyes flickering around at the many different peaks’ disciples that were standing around the arena that would soon be used. “Why did you pick this disciple to represent Qing Jing? Surely that’s a job better suited for the head disciple?”

Shu Mingru hit Shen Jiu’s head hard with his fan and then shook his head. “A-Fei is out on a mission, and she’s too old to join this competition; Jiu-er was this master's only option, don’t get too cocky.”

Rolling her eyes, she straightened her posture and observed her surroundings more closely. There looked to be a lot of disciples from other peaks that were closer to her age, Qing Jing was one of the only peaks that didn’t take on new disciples (apart from her, for some reason).

There were lots of different colors of the disciples’ uniforms, the ones she recognized were the black and gold of Qiong Ding, the brown of Qian Cao, the purple and pink of Xian Shu, and the white and gray of Bai Zhan.

For the competition she’d been given a real sword of steel instead of a wooden one, but there was a rule against spiritual weapons being used. So the chances of getting skewered by a magic sword was null, great.

She trailed behind her shizun almost like a lost little fox following its mother, but she had no choice in the matter, getting lost in a sea of battle-hungry youths sounded worse than any other fate imaginable.

Over the past year she hadn’t seen Yue Qingyuan’s face even once; after he sent the letter to Shen Jiu while she was at Qian Cao Peak (that she incinerated) it was like he’d become a real ghost.

Sure, she still heard gossip and awe-inspiring stories about the incredible Xuan Su Sword, but in her mind he was as good as dead.

But now she saw him again; he was taller, visibly older, Yue Qingyuan looked like a real adult now.

Standing next to the imposing current sect leader, he looked like a proper little crown prince, looking out over his future subjects that he’d soon be ruling over with a benevolent iron fist.

Song Mingyue spotted Shen Jiu and her shizun before Yue Qingyuan, her neutral expression turned into one made of stone and pure annoyance. Rolling her eyes, she tapped her head disciple’s shoulder and whispered something in his ear.

The young man turned and his face immediately lit up when he spotted Shen Jiu.

Shu Mingru fluttered his fan in front of his face like a swooning maiden as they reached where the sect leader was standing, her shizun was a strange man.

“Zhangmen-shijie, Yue-shizhi,” the lord of Qing Jing Peak greeted. “How lovely to see you both here; this master wasn’t sure if Mingyue would deem this competition worthy of her presence this year.”

Inside, Shen Jiu gawked at her shizun’s audacity; yeah, she’d realized that a peak lord had different privileges than a disciple, obviously— but to speak so improperly and audaciously to the sect leader?

Shameless. But alas, Shen Jiu had long since deduced that her shizun was certifiably insane.

As expected, Song Mingyue did not seem amused at her shidi’s antics. “Shu-shidi assumes too much,” she replied before turning her gaze down at the gathered disciples again. “Where is your head disciple?”

Hiding a grin behind his fan, Shu Mingru hummed amusedly. “A-Fei was busy with a mission off the peak; this master instead brought Jiu-er with him, is there a problem, Zhangmen-shijie?”

The sect leader didn’t reply and just swept a cold look at Shen Jiu; it was pretty clear that the woman did not like her. But not wishing to seem like a mannerless brat like her shizun, Shen Jiu cupped her hands and bowed to both the sect leader and her head disciple.

Yue Qingyuan was still smiling at her, albeit his smile looked a bit more strained now. “Shen-shimei,” he greeted, forcing Shen Jiu to look up at him. “Could this shixiong have a moment of shimei’s time?”

Shen Jiu frowned, she didn’t want to speak to him; who did he think he was, acting like he hadn’t been ignoring her existence for nearly a year?

“Of course, this shimei would love to have a word with Yue-shixiong.”

After moving a bit away from the peak lords— which was pointless since with their cultivation level their masters could hear them anyway— Yue Qingyuan’s face turned brighter again. “How has Xiao Jiu been? Has your studies been going well?”

Shen Jiu just stared at him and didn’t give a single peep in response; his thick skull had still not understood anything yet, still calling her Xiao Jiu even though the last time he did it she had hit him.

(She did regret that slightly, but only because she’d really begun thinking of him like a sad dog; hurting animals was not something she usually condoned.)

Yue Qingyuan continued to chatter on and on, she only replied with a hum or a shrug every ten questions; it was clear he was just filling the air.

“Yue-shixiong talks a lot,” Shen Jiu said, her voice dangerously low. “Then could he maybe talk about our past?”

The young man stiffened, but his smile didn’t waver too badly. “What part did Xiao Jiu want to discuss?”

Shen Jiu turned her chin up and her glare turned frosty enough to send shivers down the spines of even the bravest men. “The part where you abandoned me.”

Before either Yue Qingyuan or Shen Jiu could say anything more, Song Mingyue stepped forward and placed a firm hand on both of their shoulders. The woman’s grip was tight, and Shen Jiu could tell the one on her shoulder was far tighter than the one on Yue Qingyuan’s.

The sect leader looked at them with a face that seemed carved from a glacier. “Shen-shizhi should head over to the other disciples, the tournament will start soon.”

Looking over at her shizun, Shen Jiu could see him already looking at her with an unreadable gleam in his eyes; that damn look never boded any good.

She didn’t want to join the competition, but she couldn’t say no to her shizun or the sect leader, could she?

Saluting the immortal masters and the head disciple, Shen Jiu hurried away; she did not run with her tail between her legs, she was not the cowardly dog here.

When she reached the arena, the first round of the competition had already started. There was a scared-looking disciple from— what Shen Jiu assumed was— An Ding Peak; the youth’s opponent was a tall and graceful woman in Xian Shu’s colors.

While observing the mousy disciple getting absolutely pummeled, Shen Jiu’s eyes unconsciously wandered across the sea of disciples that were also watching the fight.

Eventually her gaze landed on something worth paying attention to, or rather, someone.

Standing a few zhang away from Shen Jiu was a girl wearing the grays and whites of Bai Zhan Peak; she looked to be around Shen Jiu’s own age, maybe younger, if one judged only by the soft youth that still clung to her face.

But she was tall, at least taller than Shen Jiu, her shoulders were wide, and her waist slim. Long ink black hair was tied up in a high ponytail. And even though Shen Jiu could only see her face from the side, she could tell that she had a face blessed with peerless beauty worth over a million golden ingots.

Standing with her head held high and a perfect posture, overconfidence written on her forehead, the girl looked like the perfect example of an arrogant peacock.

Shen Jiu forced herself to look away; the girl might be beautiful, but those were usually the most dangerous to be around in places like this, and she looked extremely arrogant.

The fight between the Xian Shu and An Ding disciple was over when she finally managed to pull her eyes away from the girl. The person announcing who was fighting in the next round called the next two names: Shen Jiu, and Liu Xifeng.

As she stepped forward the arena to show she was the one called, Shen Jiu looked around to see who her opponent would be. As luck (or misfortune) would have it, the one who stepped forward alongside her was the person she’d observed just moments before.

Liu Xifeng looked even more overconfident when you looked at her face from the front; clear gray phoenix eyes shone with unrestrained arrogance beneath long dark lashes.

This person seemed to think she was better than everyone, and she didn’t seem smart enough to pretend to be the least bit humble.

Well, she’d sparred against Shu Mingru quite a few times for the past few months; it wasn’t often she’d manage to get a hit in, but the technique of using a sword was something she’d learned quickly and even her teacher praised her ability (in his own way).

Hopefully she’d be able to hold her own.

The two disciples stepped into the arena, regular iron swords strapped to their hips, looking at each other with identical challenging glares, one dressed in white and gray, and the other in white and green.

Eventually the announcer decided that the fight could start, and yelled for them to begin. Liu Xifeng rushed forward, making Shen Jiu panic and she just barely managed to parry the incoming hit with her sword.

Shen Jiu jumped out of the way for the blow that followed; she’d severely underestimated the brute strength of a disciple from Bai Zhan, even though there was not a trace of spiritual energy behind the blows, they could still kill if they hit hard enough— and the blows were hard.

Avoiding another hit— earning herself a round of boos from the crowd— Shen Jiu tried to figure out Liu Xifeng’s strategy. The only problem was that there was not a trace of strategy to be picked apart. She was just attacking randomly, but she still did not leave a single opening for Shen Jiu to break her defense.

Instead of avoiding again, Shen Jiu met the next hit head on with her sword; a couple of sparks formed when the blades pressed against each other. Liu Xifeng’s face was still upholding that thick veil of arrogance.

It made anger boil in Shen Jiu’s chest everytime the other parried her attacks like they were nothing, she even had the gall to look bored.

The apathetic mask started to crack when her opponent managed to cut her sleeve and arm. Shen Jiu retaliated with a quick slash and kick, her movements turning more and more frantic, and at one point she even tried to throw sand in the girl’s eyes, but every one of her attacks and tricks were easily blocked by the other’s sword or avoided by her quick reflexes.

The cauldron was boiling and bubbling, waiting for that last bit of heat it needed to finally explode.

Finally, Liu Xifeng kicked Shen Jiu’s sword out of her hands and pushed her to the ground, making the dust fly; looking up, Shen Jiu saw the bloodied tip of a sword nearly piercing right through her throat.

The announcer declared the battle done, announcing Liu Xifeng as the winner. Cheers and applause echoed through the crowd, all praising and chanting Liu Xifeng’s name like a prayer to the heavens.

Shen Jiu’s eyes flickered to where she knew her shizun was standing; Shu Mingru was hiding the lower half of his face behind his fan, not letting his disciple see the grin he was wearing.

Liu Xifeng pulled away and sheathed her sword again, looking down at where Shen Jiu is sitting on the ground as if her opponent was merely a bug, or maybe a small scrape of dirt on her pristine boots.

Liu Xifeng frowned. “Maybe if you didn’t laze around until it was too late for you to start cultivating, you wouldn’t need to resort to dirty tricks to try and win.”

The cheers had quieted by a ton at this point, forcing Shen Jiu to be aware of the amused giggles and whispers that filled the air around them instead. But she couldn’t listen properly, all she could hear was her furious heart beating loudly in her ears as her blood boiled more and more by the second.

She didn’t reply to the comment, she simply stared down at her hands; for each second that went by, the cauldron’s contents came closer and closer to its end.

Turning around, Liu Xifeng’s ponytail swished and clear gray eyes turned to look over her shoulders one last time. Wrinkling her nose was all she did before she started walking away, head held high once more.

It was clear what she was thinking about Shen Jiu.

Weak.

Something suddenly cracked inside Shen Jiu. That was it. This girl was courting death, and Shen Jiu had just decided to accept her courtship on its behalf.

Shen Jiu waited until Liu Xifeng had walked a few steps, and then she lunged forward, using her nails to rake up a fistful of sand and gravel into her hand.

Hearing someone running at her, Liu Xifeng spun back around and was temporarily blinded by the sand that had been thrown just as Shen Jiu wrapped her arms tightly around the other’s waist and put her foot behind her leg, making Liu Xifeng stumble and get pulled down to the dirty ground alongside Shen Jiu.

Pure, unbridled fury had melted Shen Jiu’s mask away, letting out the beast that had been securely locked away in her for the past few months, and the awakened beast was lusting for blood.

Shen Jiu punched, kicked, and yelled at her opponent. “You know nothing! Nothing! I’ll kill you!”

Liu Xifeng grit her teeth and managed to flip them over, landing a few punches of her own on her opponent. Shen Jiu spat in the other’s face and raked even more gravel and dust in her eyes.

Shen Jiu then managed to land a deep scratch with her sharp nails on Liu Xifeng’s perfect, blank canvas of a face, right beneath that infuriating beauty mark under her left eye.

All around them other disciples booed or laughed, whispering how both girls were behaving like animals, clawing and rolling in the dirt with each other. Shen Jiu didn’t care enough to hear them, all she could think of was how much she hated Liu Xifeng.

Eventually Yue Qingyuan noticed that there was commotion going on by the arena, two people were fighting; he immediately rushed there when he realized that Shen Jiu was one of the parties involved.

Breathing heavily, both girls had started tiring; Liu Xifeng was straddling Shen Jiu’s hips while holding a death grip on the lapels of the other’s robes, she’d finally managed to pull her sword out of its sheath and was pressing it against Shen Jiu’s throat.

Just close enough to not leave a mark, but to still send a clear promise of spilling blood if she tried anything.

Blood dripped from Shen Jiu’s nose down onto her ruined robes, she grit her teeth, and if she was a real beast she would absolutely be growling. It wasn’t fair, all Liu Xifeng had sustained was dirt on her clothes, and a small cut underneath her eye.

“Xiao Jiu, Liu-shimei, stop it!” An unwelcome voice shouted as a pair of unwelcome hands pulled the girls apart. Yue Qingyuan pulled Shen Jiu up on her feet; luckily he thought to cage the girl in his arms, for as soon as she was steady she immediately tried to lunge at Liu Xifeng once again.

Shen Jiu tried to violently break free from Yue Qingyuan’s grasp. “Liu Xifeng, I swear I’ll kill you!”

Liu Xifeng sneered at Shen Jiu; the latter couldn’t help the single drop of satisfaction she felt as a single drop of blood rolled down the former’s cheek. But that drop of satisfaction dried out as the other spoke:

“You? Kill me?” Liu Xifeng asked, ‘with your lack of talent?’ went unsaid, but what she thought of Shen Jiu’s abilities was very clear in the way she then snorted arrogantly.

Instead of caging his martial sister in his arms any longer, Yue Qingyuan switched to grabbing a firm hold of Shen Jiu’s shoulders with both of his hands.

“This shixiong apologizes for Shen-shimei’s behavior, hopefully Liu-shimei can find it in her heart to forgive,” Yue Qingyuan hastily said to Liu Xifeng before he started to drag Shen Jiu away from the arena.

“Let me go, Yue Qingyuan!” Shen Jiu barked as she struggled against his hold, involuntary panic spreading through her body at the feeling of his hands holding onto her too tightly. “I’ll kill her, let me go!

The other didn’t reply until he’d managed to pull her to the healing tents that had been set up by Qian Cao Peak for the competition. Yue Qingyuan spun her around, he didn’t let go of her shoulders, his stern gaze was penetrating and commanding.

“Xiao Jiu, you need to calm your temper,” he said calmly, the tone of his voice sounded more like the one you’d use with a frightened animal that had gone wild rather than a human being.

(‘Xiao Jiu, you still have quite a temper, don’t you?’

‘Calm down, I’ll only take from you what’s rightfully mine, nothing more.’)

Shen Jiu pushed Yue Qingyuan off her and because he didn’t expect it, she managed to knock him to the ground. Her breathing was heavy and suffocated, her chest had tightened so much she felt as if she was going to die.

“You have no right to tell me that!” she yelled; she’d long since stopped caring about who’d hear her now. “And you have no right to touch me!”

Trying to prevent the burning tears behind her eyes from falling, Shen Jiu took a deep breath before turning around and walking away as calmly as she could, away from the fallen future sect leader who watched her leave with a crushed expression.

The storm in her chest refused to ease, resentment swirled in it along with bitter and utter hatred.

Why was everything so unfair? Why was she forced to live a life where everyone looked down on her? Why couldn’t anyone listen? Why did they just—

“Shen Jiu.”

She broke herself free from the thoughts, immediately burying them again. In front of her stood her shizun, a gentle expression gracing his features.

He approached her slowly and purposefully, once again making Shen Jiu feel more like a feral animal than a person. His eyes stared into hers, it looked like he was searching for permission to take her hand.

Going against her searing mind, she stiffly nodded.

Having been granted permission, Shu Mingru took hold of Shen Jiu’s arm and inspected where she had been cut. “Jiu-er should get these injuries cleaned up,” he said after clicking his tongue. “Come, this master will walk you back to Qing Jing Peak.”

The uncharacteristic gentleness unnerved her; the true coldness Shu Mingru sometimes showed and the usual theatrical cheeriness wasn’t anywhere to be seen, this was something new. He wasn’t smiling brightly, but his eyes weren’t those empty shells either, he just looked…normal.

And for her shizun, that wasn’t normal.

His hold of her arm was uncomfortable, but it didn’t burn, it grounded her, made it easier for the thoughts Shen Jiu had buried that managed to slip out during her moment of weakness to be buried once more.

During the walk back to the rainbow bridges, neither of them spoke a single word. What was she even supposed to do or say? Apologize for losing face for Qing Jing Peak? Beg to be punished for—

“Stop thinking, this master can hear your thoughts from here,” Shu Mingru chided while rubbing between his eyebrows, but it wasn’t actually scolding. “That Bai Zhan Peak breeds less brains with each new generation, it’s no surprise that Liu-shizhi has no manners considering who her master is.”

Shen Jiu nodded unenthusiastically, she’d heard the Qing Jing Peak Lord complain about Huo Mingrong more times than she could count; the peak lord of Bai Zhan was bullheaded, mannerless, and frustratingly stupid, if one judged by Shu Mingru’s words.

“Shizun.”

“Jiu-er.”

Taking a deep breath, Shen Jiu retrieved her arm and cupped her hands, bowing her head so she could only look towards her own feet.

“This disciple apologizes.”

Shu Mingru stayed silent, she took that as a cue to continue. “This disciple lost face for Qing Jing Peak by forgetting Shizun’s advice; begging for Shizun to punish this useless disciple.”

After a while of awkward silence, the peak lord finally sighed and snapped his fan open to hide his face. “This master accepts Jiu-er’s apology, and while he doesn’t think Jiu-er should be punished, Zhangmen-shijie definitely does.”

At the mention of Song Mingyue, Shen Jiu stiffened slightly as she remembered how she’d once again managed to lose her temper at the sect leader’s successor; it really wasn’t a good look for her.

Seeing her nervousness peeking through her attempts at an apathetic facade, Shu Mingru chuckled and placed a hand on his disciple’s bowed head; Shen Jiu bit back the urge to pull away, she was not a dog.

“Ah, Jiu-er needs not fret,” the peak lord reassured, his usual teasing tone invading his voice once more. “This master won’t let Zhangmen-shijie whip you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Shen Jiu scoffed. “Worried? Who's worried?”

Shu Mingru ruffled her dark hair before taking a firm hold of her chin. “You’ll be given two weeks to copy ‘Rules and Virtues of Qing Jing Peak’ 10 times, and this master will then be testing you on it. If Jiu-er fails, then this master will send her to An Ding Peak.”

Stiffening in his grasp, Shen Jiu managed a nod which made him release her. The man walked off, presumably heading to his house. Shen Jiu didn’t want to spend any more time with her shizun, and she had healing supplies in the woodshed, so she decided to go there instead of the peak lord’s residence.

Though she had calmed significantly, she was still furious; who did Liu Xifeng think she was? She had no idea what she was blabbing about at all!

If Shen Jiu hadn’t been sold to a perverted lunatic at twelve years old, then maybe she’d be able to fit into Liu Xifeng’s perfect image of a righteous cultivator.

But then again, probably not, since Shen Jiu had not one righteous bone in her body ever since birth.

She’d heard some things about a Liu clan before, she was pretty sure a pair of them had actually visited the Qiu estate when Qiu Haitang’s parents were still alive. The Liu clan was noble, wealthy, and had produced tons and tons of incredibly powerful cultivators.

Sure, Shen Jiu didn’t know if Liu Xifeng was from that Liu clan, but judging by her outward demeanor, she’d be willing to bet lots of silver taels on it being so.

‘Boundless talent, incredible swordsmanship, peerless beauty’. That was what she’d heard whispered about Liu Xifeng before their fight started. All she’d heard about herself was: ‘Talentless, dangerous, a peak lord’s spoiled pet.’

She’d solidified her image as someone unpredictable and violent by losing control in the tournament, and as much as she’d have enjoyed that reputation on the streets, in a righteous sect it was just begging to be thrown out sooner or later.

Shen Jiu thought long and hard about what her shizun had said before; pretending to be someone you weren’t, pretending to care about things you didn’t care about and pretending to not care for things you did care about. Could doing that really solve the problem?

Well, no, probably not; maybe if she’d begun using it sooner. She was so used to just expressing and saying whatever she felt, which was usually fury.

She’d lost control because she wasn’t used to doing it, she needed to get used to it. Shen Jiu knew that she couldn’t let words coming from people like Liu Xifeng— who had no idea what they were talking about— cause her to lose herself like that.

Shen Jiu was not an animal, she was not some wild beast who needed to be leashed by its master.

The next morning arrived with dark clouds covering the sky, the rising sun was dimmed and quiet. Shen Jiu entered Qing Jing Peak’s library; since this was the peak of scholars, of course the peak’s library was very extensive and filled to the brim with knowledge.

Many mortals would sell all their belongings and limbs for a single slim chance of entry into it!

But Shen Jiu wasn’t there to enjoy herself, her teacher had given her a task that she was determined to accomplish as quickly as possible.

The book titled: “Rules and Virtues of Qing Jing Peak” was a very… interesting read, if you asked Shen Jiu. The rules were at first interesting and fairly understandable, but they soon just turned petty and it seemed like the person who wrote the book was just fucking with everyone.

What kind of rule is “One may not have eye contact with disciples of a higher standing than yourself for more than a few seconds” anyway? Was the author deranged? Did anyone even follow these things?!

Well, it didn’t really matter, all she needed to do was copy them, Shu Mingru never said Shen Jiu had to follow them all from start to finish. Hell, she could count at least 20 rules that the peak lord himself broke daily!

Taking a correct and firm hold of her brush, Shen Jiu started copying every single rule and virtue of Qing Jing Peak that stood written in the book.

Looking at the stack of papers that Shen Jiu had put down on his desk at the end of the week, Shu Mingru let out a disbelieving laugh and rested his chin in his hand for a while, an impressed smirk tugging on the corners of his mouth.

“You know, this master really wasn’t planning on sending Jiu-er to An Ding Peak if she didn’t do what this master tasked her to do..”

Shen Jiu’s mouth curled up into an arrogant smile. “This disciple is aware; is shizun going to test this disciple on her knowledge now?”

Chapter Text

The time following her outburst at the martial arts tournament stirred up quite a good amount of trouble for both Shen Jiu herself and Qing Jing Peak as a whole. Bai Zhan Peak’s disciples were a bunch of prideful little barbarians, and when one of their own was even slightly slighted, the whole pack sought to return that slight hundredfold.

So often when Shen Jiu left Qing Jing Peak to run an errand for her (spoiled mistress) venerable shizun, or even when she was just hanging around her own peak minding her business, a pack of brats from Bai Zhan would try to ambush her and take revenge for their slighted pack leader.

It wasn’t that scary, usually most of the perpetrators were much younger than Shen Jiu and weren’t a real threat, not to her life at least, but to her sanity? A major one.

But sometimes— not as rarely as Shen Jiu wished— the flourishing phoenix of the peak herself decided to honor (curse) Shen Jiu with her saintly presence.

Those instances always ended with some part of a peak or place (usually a training ground or a rainbow bridge) being destroyed or at least slightly damaged.

The words that left Liu Xifeng’s mouth aimed at Shen Jiu the most frequently were: “Fight me!” “Don’t be such a coward!” “Stop cheating, it’s dishonorable!” and “If you didn’t wait so long to start you’d be stronger!”

Every time such a sentence was spoken by that person in Shen Jiu’s vicinity, all the progress she’d made on her dignified mask was thrown out the window as she lunged at her shimei with a fist full of gravel and a mind clouded by rage.

Liu Xifeng had apparently never had an opponent who refused to fight ‘honorably’. Shen Jiu longed for the day the other would realize that, in the real world of demons and monsters, her opponents would not be honorable and fight like gentlemen!

Eventually Shen Jiu complained so much about the attacks she was put through on the peak to Shu Mingru that the peak lord just banned all of Bai Zhan Peak’s disciples from going a li near Qing Jing Peak.

The brutes from Bai Zhan Peak were resilient, but they just needed their egos bruised enough and they’d go running back to their peak with their tails between their legs, probably to cry to their precious shijie.

Time passed quicker and quicker; autumn turned to spring in the blink of an eye, and with another blink another two autumns had already passed as well.

During those three years, all Shen Jiu did was work to become better. Her days were filled with regular classes in the 4 arts lead by the peak’s elders, private classes on more advanced subjects related to the peak’s specialties lead by her shizun, and many shichen of trying to further her cultivation on her lonesome or with her shizun’s “guidance.”

The most Shu Mingru did was sit under a tree somewhere and act as his most obnoxious self while Shen Jiu meditated, breaking her concentration more often than not. But sometimes he so graciously offered the pettiest “criticisms” and “pointers” that he would pull out of god-knows-where (usually he just lied).

(“Your leg should be half a cun to the left for the position to work.. No, the other left! My left— you know what? It doesn’t actually matter.”

“Did Jiu-er know? Eating the peaches grown on Qian Cao is proven to improve cultivation by tenfold. Hah..? What do you mean you don’t believe me?!”

“Jiu-er should talk to Yue-shizhi again, maybe that could help you break through this bottleneck…or maybe the boy’s neck...”)

Usually she just tuned out his “advice” after a while.

After the tournament, Shen Jiu was basically isolated from the rest of the peak. The rest of the disciples thought their assumptions about her being a dangerous person to be around were proven true (they were probably true), so they don’t want to be around her more than absolutely necessary.

Well, Shen Jiu didn’t cry any tears over it at all; she’d never met a Qing Jing disciple worthy of knowing anyway, so why should she care if they disliked her?

The only person who’s ire for her really mattered was the head disciple’s. Chen Fei really didn’t like Shen Jiu at all, and she would often come up with any kind of ridiculous excuse to either interrupt the younger disciple’s training, or just to punish her for something.

And even though Shen Jiu was a most favored disciple of their peak lord, Shu Mingru couldn’t really care less what happened to her when he wasn’t around, so Shen Jiu often got stuck with tasks that were meant to be done by either servants or people serving punishment.

(Why did the woodshed need so many refills every day? Did they have three-horned beevers going undercover as disciples on the peak or what!?)

During these three years, Yue Qingyuan also made an effort to bother Shen Jiu as well; his visits and general presence was more annoying than any amount of Bai Zhan brutes could ever be.

He’d show up uninvited to Qing Jing Peak— usually bringing along a lavish gift or some fancy sweets— and just either follow Shen Jiu around and try to talk to her until she had enough and shouted at him to leave, or he’d just quietly stand around for a while nearby her and look miserable.

If being near her made him feel so bad, why couldn’t he just take the hint and leave for good?

Ah, the answer to that was of course that the Xuan Su Sword was far too righteous, even though the venomous viper of Qing Jing Peak treated him so cruelly, his noble heart refused to let him rest until he had “made it up to her.”

Pah. Yue Qingyuan was truly noble. Pei pei!

It made Shen Jiu feel sick to her stomach. His visits brought nothing but misery, the amounts of rumors that had begun spreading ever since they were spotted together once were enough to put the ones about Shen Jiu and her shizun to shame.

Apparently she was “seducing” the future sect leader for her own personal gain? Heavens, if these morons thought a woman chasing a man away with curses and a sword was “seduction,” then Shen Jiu really prayed for all the women of these damn peaks.

After the first half of the second autumn had begun, Shen Jiu had finally cultivated enough to receive her own spiritual sword from Wan Jian Peak.

Her sword— Xiu Ya was its name— was a beautiful blade; the name of the sword was truly fitting, when Shen Jiu first held it in her hands, it really felt as if it was pure elegance made into a physical weapon.

A sleek blade pale as moonlight, with green gems engraved in the hilt, and beautiful silver carvings of jasmine flowers on the sheath that accompanied it, Xiu Ya was truly a weapon fit for a dignified disciple of Qing Jing Peak.

The day she finally received her sword, Shen Jiu spent shichen upon shichen just learning how to properly fly on it, taking every failure and fall with the grace of a young crane learning how to use its wings.

Nothing could spoil Shen Jiu’s glorious mood, and when she finally figured out how to use it, the evening sky had already started to turn a beautiful shade of red. But that fact didn’t sadden her, in fact it brightened her mood even further, if that was even possible.

Most of the people on Qing Jing had already gone to bed, so there was no one around to see Shen Jiu mount her sword and make her way to a small town not too far from the twelve peaks.

Standing in front of the Warm Red Pavilion for the first time in almost four years, Shen Jiu found that it hadn’t changed one bit. It still looked the exact same as when she’d visited last, before that fateful Immortal Alliance Conference.

Shen Jiu sheathed Xiu Ya and headed inside, and as soon as she stepped through the doors she was hit with the familiar scent of sweet fragrances and fresh flowers. For a second she felt like she was fifteen once again; a genuine smile spread on her face.

A pair of beautiful girls approached Shen Jiu with dazzling smiles. “Welcome, young miss,” they greeted sweetly while looking Shen Jiu up and down, the attention brought some heat to her face. “Did the young miss come here for something special?”

After awkwardly clearing her throat, Shen Jiu smiled. “This one was wondering if Chu-jiejie was still working at this establishment. If she is, tell her A-Jiu has come for a visit.” She ended her request by handing one of the girls a few silver taels each.

The girls looked at each other for a moment, looking a little stunned, then they nodded enthusiastically and one of them ran further into the brothel. “Chu-jiejie has spoken fondly of you before,” the girl that stayed behind said. “A-Jiu is definitely most welcome.”

Shen Jiu’s smile brightened, she then took a moment to look closer at the girl. She had long black hair that was half pinned up with a bejeweled lotus-shaped hairpin, peach blossom eyes the color of storm clouds, and a soft and beautiful face; her most unique feature however, was the beauty mark on her cheek.

Definitely not a bad face, in fact the girl’s face had sparked some kind of fluttering feeling in Shen Jiu’s stomach when she smiled softly at her.

“What is your name?” asked Shen Jiu, trying to sound composed even though her face felt hot.

The girl chuckled, moving closer to Shen Jiu, which just made the fluttering more intense. “This one’s name is Ning Lian, but you can call me Lian-er,” she said sweetly, her voice low so only Shen Jiu could hear.

But before either of them could say anything else, the sound of a familiar woman’s voice started getting closer and closer, immediately pulling Shen Jiu’s attention away from Ning Lian.

“A-Jiu! You’re alive!” Chu-jie exclaimed as she rushed forward and embraced Shen Jiu tightly, shocking both the person who’d been caught and Ning Lian.

Shen Jiu tried her best to escape from the older woman’s arms, but to no avail. “Chu-jiejie, A-Jiu is completely fine.. but please let go, you’re crushing me!”

Chu-jie let go slightly, but almost immediately started pulling at Shen Jiu’s face and clothes, inspecting her closely. “Bah! What have you been doing for so long? You’re still way too skinny! Lian-er, call over the other girls, we have a special guest tonight!”

Ning Lian giggled at how inelegantly the stoic Shen Jiu was being manhandled before nodding and running off, Shen Jiu was flushed red with embarrassment. “Chu-jiejie… Must you embarrass me so?”

Chu-jie pinched Shen Jiu’s red cheek and tutted. “Aiya, you want to impress Lian-er? She’ll never be impressed if you don’t eat and sleep more! Get some more meat on those tawny bones of yours, A-Jiu!”

Shen Jiu sighed fondly. “Yes, jiejie..” This would be a long night, but she was very much looking forward to it.

“Aiyo! And they just let them roam free?!” One of the ladies piled around Shen Jiu exclaimed in outrage. She’d spent the last shichen complaining about everything that had happened for the past few years, of course leaving out the more gory details..

Chu-jie pressed a kiss to the side of Shen Jiu’s head from where she was sitting behind her. “At least A-Jiu is alive,” then she poked Shen Jiu’s cheek with a sharp nail. “But how dare you let us think you’d died!?”

“Jiejie, if I could’ve returned sooner, I would’ve,” she reassured while rubbing the spot that had been attacked. “Until I got Xiu Ya I wasn’t allowed to leave the mountain by myself, and you know how cultivators feel about places like this.”

One of the other women harrumphed and handed Shen Jiu a cup of fruit wine. “That master of yours sounds like he wouldn’t mind it, if one judges how he seems from how A-Jiu speaks of him.”

That statement made Shen Jiu snort into her cup of wine. “Well, Shizun is definitely an interesting person… But enough about him!” Shen Jiu said, deciding to change the topic. “That damn Bai Zhan Peak, they can’t take even a single deserved insult or slight!”

All the women nodded along with her words in sympathy. “They sound horrid, little mannerless children like that should be kept on leashes!” one of the girls exclaimed, many others nodded in agreement.

Shen Jiu ran a hand through Ning Lian’s silky hair, the girl had decided that the other’s lap was her designated resting place, and had laid down and made herself at perfectly home. “Those from Bai Zhan are barbaric, especially their precious princess.”

Ning Lian chuckled. “Sounds like the two of you have quite a rambunctious relationship, A-Jiu.”

Shen Jiu started braiding a section of Ning Lian’s hair while rolling her eyes and scoffing. “Lian-er has no idea,” she muttered while trying to make the braid look right. “There’s no one on that mountain I hate more than that arrogant, pompous moron.”

The room all of them had decided to occupy was the same as Shen Jiu had always paid for when she was younger, it hadn’t changed one bit, it was still the same just like four years ago.

But a few other things had changed; Tao-jie had met and married a woman who treated her very well. Xiuying-jie was still around and she had started being admired by a nice old farmer’s son, Ning Lian said it was very sweet to bear witness to.

The madam of the pavilion had taken in a few little meimeis that needed homes and made Peizhi-ge teach them how to play guqin, but they still couldn’t read or write properly. Hearing this, Shen Jiu offered to come around a select few times a month and teach them, the only payment would be a good night’s sleep.

Chu-jie relayed this to Madam Xu, and the older woman had agreed happily, promising that all the services Shen Jiu might need would be free of charge, they were just happy she was alive and ‘well.’

The night of catching up came to a close too quickly in Shen Jiu’s opinion. She fell asleep holding Ning Lian close, smelling of sweet flower fragrances, cuddling close in a pile along with a few more women.

For the first time in four years, Shen Jiu slept peacefully, plagued by not a single nightmare.

Her visits to the Warm Red Pavilion went unnoticed for nearly two whole months. But one evening after one particularly bad argument with a group of disciples from Bai Zhan, one of them decided to spy on Shen Jiu and unfortunately saw her leaving the mountain late at night on her sword.

Deciding this would be a great opportunity to get the dishonorable woman alone to finally teach her a lesson, the disciple followed her all the way to the town where the Warm Red Pavilion was located.

He watched with his eyes blown wide as the arrogant Shen Jiu willingly entered a— a brothel!?

‘She’s a prostitute?! Shen Jiu is selling her body at a whorehouse! She’s losing face for the entire sect by doing this!’ The sneaking disciple cried in his heart; he refused to stand for such dishonorable things! So he rushed over to the pavilion with his sword drawn.

“Shen Jiu! Come out here!” X-shidi barked outside the brothel, his face flushed a bright red with anger and embarrassment. How dare that woman do this!?

A loud shout of her name made Shen Jiu lean out of one of the windows upstairs, nearly breaking the windowsill when she realized that it was a brat from Bai Zhan Peak. Had he followed her?! Fuck!!

Storming downstairs, Shen Jiu shot a reassuring glance at Chu-jie and Ning Lian who stood by the door looking worried. “I’ll deal with it, rest assured.”

After closing the doors behind her, Shen Jiu stood on the top of the stairs and crossed her arms over her chest, staring loftily down at her shidi.

“What is it that shidi needs? This shijie is busy.”

X-shidi pointed his sword at her. “You dare act innocent!? You’re dishonoring our sect by going to a place like this and.. and..!”

Shen Jiu snorted coldly. “Doing what? Shidi must lay his accusations clear, otherwise this shijie will not know of what misdeeds she’s committed by coming here.”

“You know what you’ve been doing!” the young man yelled, their squabble had made many of the brothel’s ladies lean out the window in intrigue and watch the debacle going down. “You’ve been selling yourself at a whorehouse! Don’t act like you didn’t! Why else would you come here?!!”

Pah! Selling her body? To whom? Men? She’d rather cut all her limbs off and bleed to death!

Instead of saying that, Shen Jiu just calmly walked down the steps and closed in on the young man. “So what? If you say nothing, no one will know, isn’t that right?” she said, voice dangerously low. “Unless, you actually want such services from this shijie?”

At that accusation, X-shidi’s expression grew furious and his face even redder. “Draw your sword! Shen Jiu, was sleeping with your shizun and Yue-shixong not enough? You want to add strangers to the list too!?”

CRACK!

All the people watching the two disciples gasped at how Shen Jiu grabbed her shidi and cleanly broke his sword arm. The young Bai Zhan disciple was not yet at a level where he could truly match his shijie; he let out a pained cry and fell to the ground, clutching his injury.

He stared up at the scarily blank-faced Shen Jiu in horror. “You— you, you broke my arm!! You..!”

A cruel smile tugged on the corners of Shen Jiu’s mouth. “Run along now little mutt, unless you want me to break your other arm and your legs too.”

Hearing her threat, the young man did not dare take a gamble on whether she was serious or not, so he quickly scrambled to his feet and ran away.

What did he expect would happen, bringing up those rumors to Shen Jiu’s face? Is sleeping with men of a higher status the only way someone like her could be successful according to them?

Her knuckles had turned white with how tightly she was clenching them; seeing that Shen Jiu was upset, Ning Lian hurried outside. “A-Jiu, let’s go back inside,” she pleaded, pulling on Shen Jiu’s hand to lead her back inside. “Hui-meimei and Yu-meimei are asking for you.”

Cold rain fell mercilessly outside the Warm Red Pavilion as two swords from Cang Qiong Mountain met in a dance of sparks; the elegant blades Xiu Ya and Cheng Luan.

Shen Jiu used Xiu Ya to push Cheng Luan and its wielder back; she still wasn’t used to her new sword, but she refused to show any weakness in front of her.

“Liu Xifeng! Have you nothing better to do than to bother me!?” she yelled as she avoided a too-close-for-comfort slash from the opposing sword.

“You’re disgracing the sect by acting this way!” the Bai Zhan disciple yelled back as she narrowly avoided getting a handful of mud in her eyes.

Shen Jiu’s grip on her sword tightened. “You—!”

“Shen-shimei, Liu-shimei, this shixiong orders you to put your swords down, now,” A stern voice behind Shen Jiu commanded. After immediately sheathing her sword, Liu Xifeng bowed her head to show respect to Yue Qingyuan.

The rain and mud had caused both Shen Jiu and Liu Xifeng to look like a pair of drenched rats, but only Shen Jiu managed to wear it like a natural; on her it looked like it was her normal state of being.

“Yue-shixiong,” Shen Jiu greeted coldly without turning around to face him; of course Yue Qingyuan had to come and ruin the moment with his saintly presence.

He just had to come here, probably to show her his sad and pathetic face that makes her stomach turn. Shen Jiu turned around to glare at the man who she despised with most of her being.

But surprisingly, Yue Qingyuan— for once in his life— looked angry. Shen Jiu immediately sheathed her sword under his stern glare; it felt like she was a child being scolded by their father for misbehaving.

Yue Qingyuan looked over at Liu Xifeng with a milder gaze, but he still looked peeved. “Liu-shimei, you should head back to your peak.”

Without giving a verbal answer, the Bai Zhan disciple nodded at Yue Qingyuan and sent one last arrogant look to Shen Jiu; the latter reciprocated by shooting the other a most hateful glare.

When Liu Xifeng had mounted her sword and flown far enough away that her white silhouette could no longer be seen in the stormy sky, Yue Qingyuan turned back to look at Shen Jiu again. “Shen-shimei, why are you like this?”

Disappointment, that was the emotion which was written clearly all over Yue Qingyuan’s face.

“Why am I like what?” Shen Jiu asked, trying to sound unbothered by the revelation that Yue Qingyuan was finally expressing his displeasure with her.

Sighing, Yue Qingyuan started pulling her away from the brothel by her sleeve, looking like a father taking his daughter home after she’d dirtied the family’s name beyond recognition; utterly humiliating.

“Two favored disciples from Cang Qiong Mountain getting into a fight outside a brothel, what will people think?” Yue Qingyuan asked, pointedly not looking back at her. “Doing things like that harms the sect’s name, and goings on in those places harms your cultivation.”

Hearing this, Shen Jiu’s anger ignited once more, she wrenched her sleeve out of his grip. “Our sect isn’t a buddhist monastery!” she all but barked. “The sect’s rules never said its disciples need to be pure and untouched; what does it matter if I want to go there?”

What was so wrong about prostitutes? They weren’t automatically bad people for what they did, it’s not like many of them wanted to be there anyway, they just weren’t as lucky as those who could learn to cultivate and join sects like Shen Jiu and Yue Qingyuan did.

Sometimes it felt like Yue Qingyuan had truly forgotten where both of them came from; if it wasn’t for her meeting Wu Yanzi, Shen Jiu would’ve likely had to start working in a brothel to survive.

After a short period of silence that felt like it stretched for hours, Yue Qingyuan sighed tiredly again. “I won’t say anything, Liu-shimei and the other shidi won’t either,” he said quietly.

He sounded like he actually believed the total bullshit he was spewing. Shen Jiu didn’t believe it for a single damn second.

Sure, Yue Qingyuan might not tell, but Bai Zhan Peak’s disciples were a bunch of whiny snitches. Liu Xifeng had come looking for her after that weakling of a shidi ran away, so he’d definitely told everyone what happened when he went crying to his shijie.

“Then this shimei must give her thanks to you both then,” she said sarcastically. “Yue-shixiong is truly too gracious, such kindness he possesses.”

Yue Qingyuan’s frown deepened. “You should stop going there,” he said again. “Your cultivation—”

Shen Jiu shot him a frosty glare that shut him right up. “My cultivation is as it is; I can do as I please, Yue-shixiong has no right to—”

A violent fit of coughs coming from the man in question interrupted Shen Jiu; her mind immediately filled with worry, she hates how instinctive it is. She took a hold of his arm to keep him steady.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her concern audible.

Yue Qingyuan eventually stopped coughing, sending her a grateful smile; the instant she feels he can support himself she lets go of him, the lingering warmth is disgustingly comforting, she hates how it feels.

“Xiao Jiu need not worry, this shixiong is fine.”

Hearing her slave name paired with what was obviously a lie, Shen Jiu scowled before unsheathing Xiu Ya and starting the flight back to Qing Jing Peak.

Standing in the Qing Jing Peak Lord’s study was always a surprise on what mood you’d get its owner in. Either the man would be his usual playful self, spewing theatrical bullshit left and right, or he’d be cold and apathetic, uncaring towards anything and everything.

Today it seemed Shu Mingru had decided to go with the first option, if one judged by the morbidly happy glint in his eyes, even though the situation really didn’t seem so cheery as his demeanor made it seem.

Shen Jiu and Chen Fei stood side by side in front of their shizun, both of them sending each other subtle hateful glares the second the peak lord turned away.

The peak lord had the lower half of his face hidden behind his fan as he addressed them. “A-Fei, Jiu-er; do either of you know why this master has called you here today?”

Chen Fei shook her head immediately, Shen Jiu thought for a split second before nodding; she’d heard some bits and pieces of what had been going on around the peaks, but nothing concrete.

Seeing their answers, Shu Mingru closed his fan with a snap and pulled out a scroll from his sleeve which he then placed on the kneeling desk. “There’s been a sickness going around the peaks, Yi Mingtao has asked me to arrange for a group to go out and search for two of the cure’s ingredients.”

Shen Jiu frowned. “What are the symptoms? Is it lethal?” She didn’t care if it was rude to interrupt him, she needed to know if…

The peak lord seemingly didn’t mind her butting in. “The symptoms appear as a regular cold for the first few days; uncontrollable coughing, high fevers, and fatigue are some,” Shu Mingru said as he motioned for them to come closer. “Then it gets more serious, the patients have begun coughing up blood and losing mobility in several of their limbs.”

Her chest tightened; the time she last saw Yue Qingyuan, looking back at it, he’d looked haggard and sick, he was coughing as well…

As if he could read her mind, Shu Mingru said, “The head disciple of Qiong Ding Peak is one of the patients whose symptoms have turned quite serious; the cure will completely cure those who are sick, but if we don’t cure them within the week, they’re as good as dead.”

That damn idiot! He got himself infected!?

He looked up at the two disciples through his lashes as he continued, “Have either of you heard of a sunshine carnation before?”

Shen Jiu nodded, and Chen Fei shook her head once again. During her studying sessions in the peak’s library, Shen Jiu had come across a lot of interesting books and scrolls about rare monsters and plants, the Sunshine Carnation being one of them.

Shu Mingru shot a smile to Shen Jiu. “Good, do you know where you can find them?” a nod. “How to make finding them easier?” another nod. “What beast lives near and guards it?” a pause, and then a headshake.

The peak lord tossed a scroll at Shen Jiu without looking up from what he’s reading. “You two will be going out on a mission to find sunshine carnations, and also extract a sample of the venom from a sun-hunting owl deer stag. That scroll contains everything you need to know about them. Go to Qiong Ding Peak, the other disciples that’ll be going with you will be waiting there. You’re both dismissed.”

“Yes Shizun,” the two disciples answered in chorus.

As the two Qing Jing disciples landed on Qiong Ding Peak, Shen Jiu opened the scroll their shizun had given them and started reading.

She’d never heard of a “sun-hunting owl deer” before, so it was intriguing to read about them. It was also a nice distraction from the harsh fact that, if they failed, Yue Qingyuan was as good as dead.

The sun-hunting owl deers were a mix between an owl and a deer; the beast had the body of a deer but had large wings and the ability to do a full circle turn-around with their head. The most interesting thing about them was that they were nearly completely blind, only able to see near light: hence the name “sun-hunting” owl deer, it seeks light so it can find food and regain its sight.

How did the sunshine carnation play into it? Well, they are a special breed of flower that emits a bright glow. They are rich in spiritual energy, and they are one of the only plants that the sun-hunting owl deer are able to find and eat without issue.

Living near these flowers lets them breed and protect their spawns and pack more easily, since they are able to see when they’re nearby them.

The owl deers sleeps during the day, and many, many people have told horror stories about how they’d nearly been eaten by the creatures when they were traveling through the woods at night— they’re omnivores, and if they come across a human holding a light they won’t hesitate to try and eat them.

Sun-hunting owl deers are very venomous, but if their venom is extracted and purified it can be used to create potent medicines with incredible effects. The venom is spread through their sharp teeth— like snakes— and if you’re unfortunate enough to run into a stag, their horns (stay away from the horns).

“Shen-shimei,” Chen Fei’s annoyed voice broke her concentration and pulled her out of the scroll’s world. “We’re going to get left behind if you don’t hurry up.”

Rolling her eyes, Shen Jiu closed and put the scroll back into her sleeve and increased her walking speed. When they got to the center of Qiong Ding Peak, there were a total of eight disciples and one master there.

Two from Qian Cao Peak, two from Xian Shu Peak, and four from Bai Zhan Peak. The master is none other than Sect Leader Song.

Shen Jiu’s eyes narrowed once she realized who one of the Bai Zhan disciples were; Liu Xifeng watched Shen Jiu and Chen Fei approach with a deep frown, particularly focused on Shen Jiu, not unexpected.

So she’d be stuck with the brute for this extremely important mission that if it failed would result in Yue Qingyuan’s death. Great. But as much as she despised Liu Xifeng, she wouldn’t let their animosity kill Qi-g— their future sect leader.

Song Mingyue watched them closely as they cupped their hands and showed their respects to her. “Shen-shizhi, Chen-shizhi, did Shu-shidi provide you with the information about the mission?”

The sect leader doesn’t direct the question at Shen Jiu, so instead she takes a moment to glare daggers at Liu Xifeng instead; the other sniffs and turns her nose up and away, what a snob.

“Answering Zhangmen-shigu, these disciples have received a scroll containing details about both the plant and beast we’ll be hunting,” Chen Fei answered obediently; when she wasn’t being a raging asshole, she had the appropriate outward grace expected of Qing Jing Peak’s head disciple, too bad she was an asshole majority of the time.

Apparently satisfied with what she’s heard, Song Mingyue nodded before clearing her throat and making all the disciples look at her.

“You’ll be going to the Ying Zhi forest to find sunshine carnations and the sun-hunting owl deer; if you do not find them, then a big portion of the sect’s disciples might die. There are other groups searching other areas, but do not let that information think you can relax and not take this seriously.”

Song Mingyue’s voice is cutting and commanding, every disciple stands as stiff as boards as she continues to inform where they’ll be heading and handing a map to one of the Qian Cao disciples.

Once the sect leader made sure that the map was being studied properly, she turned to look directly at Shen Jiu. “I give Shen-shizhi the task of informing her fellow disciples here about the specifics of the plants and beasts. You are all to be back before tomorrow night, do not fail.”

Explaining all the details and risks about hunting sun-hunting owl deers to Bai Zhan Peak disciples should replace caning as a corporal punishment, in Shen Jiu’s humble opinion.

She would happily be whipped if it meant she wouldn’t be forced to listen to Tong-shidi ask: “But why can’t I use a light-summoning spell near the beast? Can’t I just kill it when it attacks?” for the third time in less than half an incense time.

Shen Jiu massaged her eyebrows for the nth time of the day and sighed deeply. “The beast’s eyesight is improved near light, and its venom is lethal, even a single scratch from its teeth or a stag’s horns is a near guarantee you’ll be meeting your ancestors by tomorrow morning!”

Why did no one put an age limit on this damn mission!? Apart from Liu Xifeng, Chen Fei, and herself, all the disciples are barely over eighteen! One of the ones from Bai Zhan— Tong Yu— was fifteen…

‘Heavens, please spare this humble Shen’s sanity…’

Tong Yu does not seem particularly convinced, these damn idiots from the brute peak seemed to lose brain cells by the second. “But what if I instead—!”

His question was interrupted by Liu Xifeng slapping the back of his head with her hand. “The sun is setting soon, so we should start the flight to Ying Zhi now to make it there before nightfall.”

As much as Shen Jiu hated to admit it, it was kind of impressive how the brute managed to lure the younger disciples into looking at her like a saint. The others all nodded and pulled out their swords, and for some reason Shen Jiu managed to end up right next to Liu Xifeng.

As she pulled Xiu Ya out of its sheath, she sees Liu Xifeng shoot her a sideways glance; it is an instant annoyance, Shen Jiu glares back head-on.

“What? Is the way I hold my sword ‘dishonorable’ too?” she snarled, making the other Bai Zhan disciples glare at her for daring to speak like that to their shijie.

Liu Xifeng just huffed and pulled her own sword out, Chen’s Liam glimmered in the evening light. “You can’t ruin this mission,” she said firmly, not looking at Shen Jiu specifically, but Shen Jiu felt like it was probably directed at her.. “Yue-shixiong’s life is on the line.”

“…” Shen Jiu felt too offended to reply to that.

She can’t ruin this mission!? Has that buffoon even seen how fucking incompetent her shidi and shimei are? They were asking why they weren’t allowed to go near the LETHALLY VENOMOUS HORNS of the beast they’re going to be hunting literally seconds ago!!

The sheer fucking nerve!

Instead of shooting back her own venom at her most loathed martial sibling, Shen Jiu simply ordered the person in charge of the map to lead them in the direction of Ying Zhi forest.

She would not fail, she would find those damn plants and kill the beast with her bare hands if necessary. Shen Jiu would not let Yue Qingyuan die.

They arrive at where the Ying Zhi forest began just as the last light of the setting sun disappeared from the horizon. Shen Jiu opened her qiankun pouch to see if everything she needed was in there; water, bandages, and special light talismans her shizun had made.

Everything was in its place, good. She turned to look at the younger disciples, they all looked at their other seniors with unrestrained admiration, but when they turned their glances towards her their admiration turned to fear or contempt.

She rolled her eyes. Whatever, she wouldn’t waste energy scolding disrespectful children.

She took out a stack of talismans and handed everyone at least two. “These talismans are specifically made to not be seen by non-human creatures, in other words,” she turned to glare at Tong Yu, “they are safe to use near the beasts, but if you use any other kind of light spell, you’re for sure dead.”

“Shen-shimei, don’t scare them,” Chen Fei said; the mask of a caring shijie was one that fit her perfectly.

Shen Jiu didn’t respond immediately, she just smiled insincerely and forcefully shoved a few talismans into her shijie’s hands too. “This shimei was just relaying Shizun’s words, Da-shijie.”

Turning back to the group, her smile drops instantly, making a few of them shiver. “These beasts have acute reflexes, if you get targeted by one the chance of us being able to help you are slim. Once the carnations are plucked their light goes out, so don’t worry about that. If you have a spiritual sword, do not even think of channeling spiritual energy in it.”

The youngest disciples all nod fake-enthusiastically, too intimidated to ask why. Seeing that they’ve listened, Shen Jiu turns around and lights a talisman, then she begins walking into the pitch black forest.

The group is suspiciously quiet, but Shen Jiu enjoys being able to hear her own thoughts, so she doesn’t say anything about it. Suddenly she hears someone increasing their speed, and a person falls into step beside her.

“Does Liu-shimei need something?” She asked flatly, she was definitely not in a mood to argue.

Liu Xifeng looked around the forest for a moment before answering. “How quickly does the beast’s venom work?”

“Anywhere between half an incense stick’s time and four shichen, it all depends on the strength of your cultivation and your body,” Shen Jiu replied, then she lowered her voice. “That’s why these kids should not be anywhere near this mission, they’re inexperienced and not anywhere near strong enough.”

Hearing an arrogant hum coming from beside her, Shen Jiu snapped her head around to send her shimei a death glare. “What? Does Liu-shimei find something this shijie said amusing?”

“If it’s based on cultivation strength, then you shouldn’t be anywhere near the beasts either,” Liu Xifeng says matter-of-factly.

It’s only because of the fact that Yue Qingyuan’s life is on the line that Shen Jiu doesn’t draw her sword and immediately stab her shimei.

Instead of doing anything she will definitely regret afterwards, Shen Jiu just sniffed and started walking faster, searching intently for the warm glow of the sunshine carnations. ‘Maybe I’m not as strong as you, but at least I’m not a barbaric moron.’

Suddenly, the excited voice of Tong Yu sounded through the forest. “Shen-shijie! I see the flowers!”

Someone should really scold him for potentially alerting every monster in the area, but the relief that they’ve found one of their targets is enough for Shen Jiu to forget all about yelling and she just runs over to see.

She reaches Tong Yu’s side and the teenager confidently points at a clearing a few zhang away, in the middle of it is a couple of glowing flowers.

Sunshine carnations!

“Good job, shidi!” Chen Fei said enthusiastically and patted the youth on the head.

‘Ugh, spare me the theatrics,’ Shen Jiu thinks exasperatedly as she rolls her eyes. “Follow me; this one and Liu-shimei will pick the flowers, everyone else stay at least one zhang away from the flowers.”

Sounds of protest follows her orders, but no one explicitly argues against it. Shen Jiu shoots a look at Liu Xifeng and the latter nods as she follows Shen Jiu closely. ‘Obedient in serious situations, that’s good to know at least.’

Carefully, Shen Jiu and Liu Xifeng make their way to the flowers, only around seven or eight, but hopefully the other groups out searching find some. Shen Jiu kneeled down by one of them and plucks it from its stem, the bright light immediately goes out, leaving only a dull yellow flower instead.

She continued to pluck the flowers while looking around the area; not a single hide or hair of any sun-hunting owl deers could be seen, which was strange, because this was an ideal spot.

As Shen Jiu picked the second to last flower, Tong Yu, goes against his shijies’ orders of staying put and ran up to Shen Jiu. “Shen-shijie! Where are the monsters? We still need the venom, right!?”

Slapping a silencing talisman on the youth’s forehead, Shen Jiu then grabbed him by the arm. “Which part of don’t shout and don’t move do you not understand!?” she hissed aggressively. These kids are so stupid!

“Go the hell back to the others!” Liu Xifeng hissed from behind them, she looked very pissed at her shidi for going against the very simple orders of ‘don’t move.’

Tong Yu pouted and looked like he wanted to argue, but he reluctantly turned to make his way back to the rest of the group.

A bad feeling in her gut made Shen Jiu whisper to no one in particular, “It really is strange, the owl deers wouldn’t realistically forego a place like this…”

The sound of rustling leaves coming from above their heads made both Liu Xifeng, Tong Yu, and Shen Jiu stop dead in their tracks.

Shen Jiu cursed a hundred generations of her own ancestors. How the fuck could she forget about the owl part of the creature’s name!?

Activating another light talisman, Shen Jiu sends it up to illuminate the treetops. A whole pack of sun-hunting owl deers were perched in the trees, looking down towards where the last sunshine carnation was with wide, unblinking, milk-white eyes.

Seeing Shen Jiu send up a light talisman to illuminate the area better, Tong Yu rummaged through his own pouch to find the talismans his shijie gave him.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t cleaned the regular light talismans out of it.

“Shen-shijie! I’ll help!”

Shen Jiu’s head turned toward him at a neck-breaking speed; seeing that he was about to use the wrong talisman, Shen Jiu couldn’t help the loud shout of “NO!” that escaped her.

The yelling disturbed the perched beasts, and the talisman was dropped and lit, illuminating the surrounding area a bit too much with non anti-beast light.

Hauling Tong Yu by the scruff of his robes, Shen Jiu was just about to shove him toward the rest of the group. “Run, you fucking moron!” she barked.

A heavy thud in front of them made Shen Jiu’s hauling come to an abrupt halt and she instead threw Tong Yu behind her instead. The big— disgustingly huge— owl deer stag with glowing white eyes spread its wings wide, its ridiculously large horned crown nearly glistened alongside its eyes in the moonlight.

A dozen smaller owl deers left their trees and their eyes locked on the now panicking juniors. Liu Xifeng rushed towards them to fight the deers off, leaving Shen Jiu alone to fight the stag.

She turned to Tong Yu and yelled, “Run the other way, do not touch any more talismans, you idiot!” Then she pulled out Xiu Ya of its sheath and refrained from using her spiritual energy, instead focusing on running toward the dropped talisman.

The stag listened to her movements closely but didn’t rush at Shen Jiu until she was just one step away from the talisman. Letting out an ear-shattering roar, the stag started rushing at her.

She narrowly avoided getting scratched by its horns by rolling away; the beast unhinged its jaw and the pale moonlight made its sharp canines glimmer.

An involuntary shudder ran through her body, those were definitely not toys, they would shred her to bits if she wasn’t careful!

A voice from behind the stag makes her wish she never woke up that morning. “Shen-shijie! I’ll help!” Tong Yu exclaims. The stag turned its head all the way around and the younger disciple shrieked.

Shen Jiu’s patience snapped; going against her own rules, she formed a sword seal with her hand and sent her sword out to attack the stag to regain its attention. “What are you doing!? Run away, you fool!”

Turning its head back to Shen Jiu, the beast lunged at her again. Tong Yu let out a surprised shout when Shen Jiu jumped onto her sword just in the nick of time to avoid getting pierced by the horns again.

She grabbed Tong Yu while flying around to try and disorient the stag, but the light talisman still hasn’t stopped and it just flies up into the air as well to chase her around the clearing.

When she flew over where Chen Fei had just killed one of the deers, Shen Jiu stuffed the flower bag in Tong Yu’s hands and threw him down at her shijie before continuing to fly away to distract the stag.

“Da-shijie!” Shen Jiu shouted, praying that the woman in question could hear her. “Take the flowers and run! I’ll kill this thing and then I’ll join you!”

If she received an answer, she’s too far away to hear it. Shen Jiu doesn’t dare look back, she’s out of the range for the light talisman, but Xiu Ya is still emitting light, so the stag is still able to follow her through the dark woods skillfully.

As she sped between trees and through bushes, Shen Jiu cursed out loud. “Fuck fuck fuck! At least the others have the flowers, but we still need the stag’s venom. How the fuck am I meant to kill it without dying myself!? Think think think!”

Hearing the beast nearly breathing down her neck, Shen Jiu made the stupid decision of pulling her sword from under her own feet and falling down into a nearby clearing, the sudden change in altitude caused the stag to stagger slightly as it landed as well.

Having used much spiritual energy flying at full speed for a while, Shen Jiu’s head had begun pounding, sweat dripped from her forehead as she sent a bright sword glare at the beast to catch its attention.

She formed another sword seal to have Xiu Ya stab at the stag from behind, but just as she was about to do it the beast lunged at her with deadly force and speed.

Sharp, horrifically strong canines bit down on Shen Jiu’s arm, ripping a guttural scream from her throat. Taking advantage of its momentary distraction, she formed the seal with her other hand and sent Xiu Ya right right through the stag’s head, then through its heart, and then its head again.

The pressure on her arm loosened and both of them fell to the ground with a thud. Clutching her arm, Shen Jiu has to bite her tongue hard to not start crying.

It’s even worse than the pain she felt during her first qi-deviation; she could feel the stag’s venom enter her body, turning her blood hotter and hotter and more unbearable for every second that goes by.

Shen Jiu opened her qiankun pouch with shaky and blood soaked hands, emptying its contents onto the ground. Biting back a pained whimper, she pulled out the roll of bandages and tied the cloth far too tightly around her upper arm, trying to prevent the venom from spreading too quickly. After pouring all her water on the wound, she wrapped that up too.

‘If I die I’m going to haunt the Tong family for all generations to come, fuck you, Tong Yu!’ Shen Jiu screamed internally as she walked up to the corpse of the stag on severely unsteady legs.

She pulled out an empty glass vial out of her un-ruined sleeve and opened the stag’s mouth. She was extremely careful to not prick her fingers on the sharp teeth as she reached far back in the mouth to find the glands that the venom is stored in.

After a short while of cursing at the pain in her body and searching in the mouth of the stag, Shen Jiu finally found the glands and started to extract the venom. Her hands are shaky and clammy, but she managed to fill the entire vial with venom.

Picking up Xiu Ya and flicking the dirty blood off the elegant blade, Shen Jiu made it hover in front of her before mounting it, desperately pushing down the absolute worst pain she’s ever felt in her entire life

‘If you don’t pull yourself together, Qi-ge will die; Xiao Jiu and Qi-ge will die together, but that doesn’t sound too bad, does it?’

“…Shut up.” Why are her thoughts so idiotic? Are they supposed to be like that? That sounds awful.

Eventually she found her way back to the rest of the group, the whole time she’s flying, Shen Jiu’s mind is completely muddled, aches and cramps are spreading from the wound, but she wills her body to not shake.

They need to get back to the peaks, they can’t afford delays, and she refuses to become a burden. She pulled her ruined sleeve down over her arm and begged that no one would notice it, as long as she gets to Qian Cao Peak she would be fine, totally fine.

Liu Xifeng spots her first, and the Bai Zhan disciple’s face lights up. Shen Jiu is too tired to comment, she just lands next to the group and hands over the vial. “The extracted venom is in there, let’s go.”

“Are you okay? You didn’t get injured?” Liu Xifeng asked; her expression was strange, but Shen Jiu’s mind was too affected by the spreading toxin to figure out what kind of expression it was.

She glared at her shimei. “I am fine, let’s go back to Qian Cao Peak and deliver everything to Yi-shishu.”

No one else was injured, Chen Fei, Liu Xifeng, and a few of the juniors were able to kill the smaller owl deers with ease after Shen Jiu lured away the stag.

With both the venom and flowers in their possession, the group starts the flight back to their sect. Shen Jiu tries to ignore the way her whole body desperately wants to convulse and fall apart.

‘Get it together, this is nothing compared to what you’ve felt before in your life!’

They arrive at Qian Cao Peak without any delays, the moon has just reached the peak of the dark sky. Chen Fei takes the bag of flowers and vial of venom from Liu Xifeng, then she hurries up the steps of the peak with the rest of the group.

Only Liu Xifeng and Shen Jiu haven’t started walking up, the former because she’s busy looking at the latter; Shen Jiu jumps off her sword and sheaths it, her body is visibly shaking now.

‘Fuck.’

Liu Xifeng’s brows furrow and she steps closer to her shijie. “Shen Jiu, what’s wrong?”

Shen Jiu steps back, steadying herself with the sheathed Xiu Ya. “Don’t bother pretending to care, Liu-shimei, run along to the others.”

“You’re shaking—”

“Go away!” Shen Jiu snaps as she staggers back, only keeping herself standing with the help of her sword, her vision is swimming and everything hurts. “I’m going back to Qing Jing Peak; goodbye, Liu-shimei.”

She is able to take a total of four steps forward before her legs give in; falling onto the stone with a heavy thud, Shen Jiu’s body starts to convulse and blood begins to drip from her mouth.

‘Fuck… of course I’m too weak to hold on just a little bit longer..!’

Liu Xifeng’s panicked shout of “SHEN JIU!” is the last thing Shen Jiu hears before her vision starts going swimmy and dark.

‘Ugh. This sucks…’

“Hey! Shen Jiu! Don’t close your eyes! Someone! My shijie collapsed! Shen Jiu, hold on..”

‘..Loudmouthed brute…’

She doesn’t remember anything after that, all she could feel was the cold, cruel embrace of sleep welcoming her back for another round of torture.

‘Xiao Jiu, why are you being so difficult? Just stop struggling…’

‘Xiao Jiu! I promise I’ll be back for you, I promise!’

‘Xiao Jiu… I won’t let you leave me.’

…

Xiao Jiu, Xiao Jiu, Xiao Jiu, Xiao Jiu.

‘I’ll be back for you, I swear it.’

…

‘Just give me what’s rightfully mine, Xiao Jiu.’

… …

“Stop… stop it..! STOP IT!”

Shen Jiu startles awake in a cold sweat, breathing heavily, heart nearly breaking out of her ribcage. She looks around, the familiar sight of Qian Cao Peak’s healing pavilion calms her slightly.

Her eyes flicker down on her body; the robes she’s wearing are the same from earlier, blood-soaked— both hers and the beast’s— and stained with mud and general filth. Disgusting, but she’d rather be covered in filth than have anyone change her without her knowledge and consent.

A series of coughs wracks her body, forcing her to lie down again; when she pulls her hand from her mouth she’s not surprised to find blood on it. It feels as if her entire body has been shredded to pieces and stitched back together again.

“Shen-shijie! Don’t move!” Mu Anwei’s worried voice makes her want to strangle herself with the bedsheets. The head disciple of Qian Cao hurries over to Shen Jiu’s bedside and hands her a cup of water. “You’ll probably be coughing up blood for a while, but don’t worry, it’s just your body expelling all of the toxins.”

Shen Jiu just groans and coughs again, her throat feels raw and bloody, and her mouth tastes very much like metal. “..What happened?” She has some guesses, but her memory of everything after she killed the sun-hunting owl deer stag is very fuzzy and unclear.

Mu Anwei sighs and takes her wrist to check her meridians. “Liu-shijie brought you in saying you’d collapsed on the steps of Qian Cao Peak after you all returned from your mission,” he says and then nails her with a stern look. “You had a very gnarly bite wound, care to explain why you tried to leave and not be treated? Why didn't you tell your group?”

“We couldn’t afford a delay,” Shen Jiu mutters while letting her eyes dart away from her shidi’s face, Mu Anwei is quite unnerving when he’s mad. “None of us had an antidote, we’d have been forced to fly back anyway.”

“You could’ve lost consciousness when flying! You could’ve died, it’s a damn miracle you’re still alive!”

“I had it under control,” she snaps.

Seeing as his shijie was refusing to accept that she did something utterly stupid, Mu Anwei just breathes a heavy sigh and gives Shen Jiu some medicine. “Well, the cure for the sickness has been made, it wouldn’t have been possible without you.”

Shen Jiu definitely doesn’t breathe a sigh of relief. “..So is Qi— is Yue-shixiong cured?”

Mu Anwei smiles and nods. “Yue-shixiong is fine, he tried to visit you earlier when you weren’t awake, but I told him to come back when you were better.”

At least Qi-g— Yue Qingyuan was fine, good, because that bastard isn’t allowed to die on her before he’s explained himself, and not afterwards either.

(That horribly weak part of her knows that she wouldn’t be able to handle it if he did die…)

“Shen-shijie, you really are lucky to be alive,” the healer says with a serious frown. “If Liu-shijie hadn’t brought you in as quick as she did then you would’ve died.”

“…” Shen Jiu didn’t deem that worthy of a reply.

Great, so now she owed that brute a life debt, just perfect, incredible. Not wishing to think about that horrid reality, Shen Jiu changed the topic. “How long have I been unconscious for?”

“Nearly three weeks, my shifu had to put you in a coma because otherwise the toxins would have reached your heart and lungs.”

Three weeks!? She must’ve missed so much work, god fucking dammit Shu Mingru, whyd you force her to go on that cursed mission!?

“Thanking Mu-shidi for taking care of this shijie; when can this one return to Qing Jing Peak?”

For a few moments the man is just silent, staring at Shen Jiu in what looks like exasperation and disbelief, she raises an eyebrow at him and crosses her arms over her chest defensively.

“What?”

“You— Shen-shijie, you nearly died!” Mu Anwei exclaims while putting his head in his hands. “You can’t seriously be thinking about going back to work already? No, you’re not going back to your peak until you’ve expelled all the waste, your body needs to—”

The door to the room is kicked open, the patient in the bed curses loudly and pulls the covers over her face. Of course her day has to get even worse!

“Shen Jiu!” Liu Xifeng yells as she marches up to her shijie’s bedside, Mu Anwei just stands up with his arms held in surrender and waltzes off to do something else.

“Liu-shimei,” Shen Jiu greets flatly without pulling the covers down from her face. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Why did you do that?”

“Do what?” she snarls in reply.

Liu Xifeng pulls the covers down despite Shen Jiu’s protests, the two women glare at each other without speaking for a pretty long time, it's the longest they’ve gone without yelling.

“You got hurt, why didn’t you tell me when I asked?”

Scoffing, Shen Jiu crosses her arms and looks away. “What would you have done? Amputated my arm?”

“I would’ve given you the antidote!” Liu Xifeng said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“…” Both Mu Anwei and Shen Jiu just stared at Liu Xifeng, the first in confusion mixed with disbelief, and the second with just pure shock.

… …

The what?

“..You had an antidote?” Shen Jiu asked, body going stiff; she can feel the need to cough up more blood, and not because of the toxins being expelled.

Liu Xifeng nods. “Zhangmen-shigu gave all of us an antidote for sun-hunting owl deer venom. I went through your pouch, why didn’t you have it?”

Inside her mind, Shen Jiu throws her head back and cackles. The sect leader really hated her, didn’t she? That can’t have been an oversight, no way in hell that was a mistake.

But instead of causing issues, Shen Jiu just shrugs. “I must’ve forgotten to pack it.” If Liu Xifeng believed her or not, she didn’t know, but she probably did; the other woman wasn’t smart enough to know, probably.

“Be more careful,” Liu Xifeng says, sounding stiff and uncomfortable. “It would’ve lost face for the sect if you just died like that.” Ah, right back to being a massive asshole, keeping her big mouth shut was apparently too great a task for this brute.

“I’ll be sure to make my death as hushed and private as possible, Liu-shimei needn’t worry,” she said bitterly before climbing out of the bed despite Mu Anwei’s squawks of protest. “Has my shizun visited me while I was unconscious?”

Stopping his fretting for a moment to look slightly guilty, Mu Anwei shakes his head. “Shu-shibo hasn’t been here, I can ask my shifu to—”

“No need,” she interrupted him mid sentence. “I’ll be going back to Qing Jing Peak now anyway.”

“What part of ‘until your body expels everything’ don’t you understand?!” Mu Anwei nearly shouts, sounding extremely tired and irritated. “Shen-shijie, you’re not going back until this shidi has made sure you won’t relapse and die. Sun-hunting owl deer venom is no laughing matter!”

“I am clearly well enough to sit around and be yelled at, so why can’t I just go and do something actually useful?” she asked, feeling increasingly agitated, both at Mu Anwei’s insistence she stay put and Liu Xifeng’s general presence near her.

Shen Jiu turns to glare daggers at the Bai Zhan disciple standing far too close to her. “Why are you still here? Haven’t got any juniors to beat up so you have to bother a recovering woman?” she snapped.

Liu Xifeng’s face soured and she crossed her arms over her chest, looking very offended. “I wanted to make sure you hadn’t died.”

“Why do you care?” Shen Jiu snarls. Ignoring Mu Anwei’s frantic attempts to keep her longer, she stormed out of the healing pavilion and began the long walk back to Qing Jing Peak.

During her walk back to her own peak, Shen Jiu’s mind began to wander as well; if it indeed wasn’t an oversight that she didn’t get the antidote, what would Song Mingyue gain from getting rid of her? She’d never done anything that could’ve been seen as a slight to her personally.

She’d need to be more careful around that woman until she got to the bottom of it, because if she wasn’t then the next time something like this happened then Shen Jiu might end up in a coffin.

There was also the problem of her cultivation; the reason she hadn’t been able to hold on longer with the venom was because her body and cultivation wasn’t strong enough, and that just wouldn’t do.

After suffering through walking across the whole peak and getting properly stared at, Shen Jiu finally made it to her shizun’s residence and entered the study; Shu Mingru was sitting by the study’s low desk and reading a book, one called “Cranes in Spring, the Jasmine Blooms.”

She kneeled down in front of the desk, the man didn’t even look up from what he was reading. “This disciple has returned,” she announced, though she figured that it didn’t really matter. Her shizun hadn’t even bothered to check on her when she was in a coma for three weeks, but it didn’t hurt her feelings in the slightest.

Shen Jiu knew their relationship was unconventional, it wasn’t proper— borderline disrespectful sometimes— and they didn’t actually like each other; she was just using him, and he was doing something with her, she just didn’t really know exactly what yet.

Keeping her around as a toy for his sick amusement, maybe. Shu Mingru wasn’t the lecherous type, but she knew that he definitely felt some sort of sick satisfaction from seeing Shen Jiu struggle. Sick fuck.

As she’d expected, Shu Mingru barely looked at her, instead he just smiled to himself as he turned to the next page in his book. “So she has; Jiu-er really gave this master a scare,” he said lazily, looking the furthest from concern a person could look.

Gave him a scare, yeah right, as if he could feel anything apart from gloating and literally nothing.

“This disciple apologizes for worrying Shizun,” Shen Jiu said, her lack of remorse very clear in her tone. Shu Mingru just snorted at her apology, finally raising his gaze from the book to look at her for a moment.

He wrinkled his nose in disgust, although his foxy smile somehow still stayed intact. “You look unsightly, get cleaned up and then go and sleep in the side room; no disciple of mine should go around looking like some runaway slave.”

… …

It felt like all air was sucked out of her lungs; Shen Jiu went rigid, struggling to regain herself.

That can’t have been a coincidence, that was— did he know? He must know, that can’t just have been a random comparison to make, the man never said anything that wasn’t deliberate, that is something Shen Jiu had learned after being his disciple for this long.

She wanted to slap herself in the face; her shizun was frighteningly clever, of course he’d figured it out— it wasn’t like she’d changed her name, because she was a fool who at sixteen had no foresight.

But if he knew, why hadn’t he turned her in to the authorities? Or maybe he’d told the sect leader? Did Song Mingyue know, was that why she had tried to get rid of Shen Jiu?

Going by her slave name— even if it was with a different character— was an idiotic mistake, she should’ve changed it as soon as she left the Qiu’s.

The Qiu brand on her back felt like it was scorching, just like it had felt the night after it had been permanently burned into her skin.

“Jiu-er, did you hear this master?” Shu Mingru’s teasing voice pulled her attention away from the burning itch coming from the brand and back on him; the look in his eyes told her everything she needed to know: he knew. “Go and fix your unsightly state, hurry along.”

Shen Jiu took a steadying breath and pinned him with a determined look. “Shizun, this disciple would like permission to enter seclusion in the Lingxi Caves.”

At that, Shu Mingru’s eyebrows lifted slightly but his smile didn’t waver, as if he hadn’t really expected her to request that, but still feeling amused by it all.

“Oh? And why should this master give Jiu-er that permission?” he asked, finally putting the book down and leaning forward, resting his chin in his hand. “If this master recalls correctly, Jiu-er is very fragile; such a qi-rich environment might trigger another qi-deviation.”

Fragile? She’d show him fragile. “This disciple knows of the risks but is more than willing to take them; Shizun won’t regret it, this disciple promises that.” She did not take promises lightly, she knew that he knew it, the look in his eye when he observed her and Yue Qingyuan told her as much.

He knew far too much about everything, it often felt like Shu Mingru was more of an all-knowing god than just one of the brightest scholars in the Jianghu.

After a long while of complete silence and unbroken eye contact, Shu Mingru let out a chuckle. “Alright then,” he said and waved a dismissive hand in the air. “Normally, disciples who haven’t entered the early core formation stage shouldn’t enter the caves, but this master trusts that his Jiu-er knows what she’s doing.”

He paused for a second and glanced over at Shen Jiu once again, his nose wrinkling. “Now get out of my sight; I don’t want any of that ghastly forest smell in my study any longer.”

It wasn’t until she had washed up and started meditating in Shu Mingru’s residence’s side room that Shen Jiu realized she had no idea where Xiu Ya was.

‘Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,’ she cursed internally as she quickly— but quietly— made her way through the house and out the door. How could she have forgotten her damn sword?! She’d just gotten it, Shu Mingru would never let her live it down if she lost it!

But just as she threw the door open and was about to run down the steps and rush over to ask Mu Anwei if he’d seen Xiu Ya, she almost tripped on something lying on the stairs.

Shen Jiu looked down and she could feel her eyes widen slightly as she realized what it was she’d nearly stepped on. On the steps lay Xiu Ya, looking perfectly elegant as always.

Picking it up, she confirmed that it was indeed her sword and not some kind of trap. Good. But what the hell was it doing on her shizun’s doorstep?!

Did someone follow her after she left Qian Cao Peak? She furrowed her brows and looked around the area after having that thought. There was not a soul in sight.

As she was about to head inside again, Shen Jiu noticed that something had been tucked into Xiu Ya’s sheath. Pulling it out, she found that it was a neatly folded piece of paper.

After unfolding it, Shen Jiu read the two sentences and almost immediately set it on fire.

“You forgot this at Qian Cao. You shouldn’t be staying in your master’s private residence, it’s inappropriate.”

She didn’t need to have Shu Mingru’s intellect to know who it was from. That damned barbarian, did she think that her neat and elegant calligraphy could distract Shen Jiu from the letter’s offensive contents!?

Brainless, horrid, offensive to look at, moronic fool, dimwitted, arrogant, more pompous than a peacock, more childish than an actual child, a waste of cultivation and space.

Shen Jiu repeated this over and over again as she tried— and failed to fall asleep.

The next morning, after Shen Jiu had discreetly sent a message to the women at the brothel about her seclusion, Shu Mingru followed her to the Lingxi Caves and told her that he expected good results or she could kiss staying at Qing Jing Peak goodbye forever; he wasn’t interested in continuing to be her teacher if she didn’t bring results from this risk.

As she settled in a secluded spot deep within the caves, Shen Jiu could only think of one thing. She’d show him, she’d show everyone, she’d show them that she was not the spoiled pet they all thought she was.

Clear your heart, clear your mind.

Chapter Text

The time Shen Jiu spent in the caves was… there weren’t really words to describe it. Horrible, was one that was half-true; it was quiet, quieter than the dead. She was all alone, and that should have been great, but the loneliness and the constant “connecting to the heart and soul” made her nightmares much worse.

She’d thought that meditating wouldn’t let her dream, but she was wrong; Shen Jiu hated being wrong.

It was the worst in the beginning, the first… month? Week? Telling time was difficult when you were so deep in the caves, but she digresses.

For a while after she entered seclusion, Shen Jiu would be trapped in long nightmares as she meditated; nothing she couldn’t handle, but they disturbed her concentration and forced her to re-do and re-do over and over and over again.

Her mind would be invaded and violated by old memories that she was sure she’d managed to bury properly; scorching touches, and unwanted, disgusting words from a perverse lunatic. But she refused to let that beast ruin her progress, so she pushed through.

(Shen Jiu couldn’t count on all her fingers and toes combined how many times she’d killed Qiu Jianluo in those meditative dreams; all she knew is that it wasn’t enough times.)

Her progress had been halted slightly because of the excessive healing that she was required to do (that damn sun-hunting owl deer had made her lose so much face, she never wanted to see one ever again), but eventually she was able to start cultivating to improve and not to heal.

(Maybe if she’d stayed on Qian Cao Peak for a few more days after she woke up from her coma it might've let her waste less time, but it was a matter of pride.)

When she finally felt herself break through the painfully stubborn bottleneck she’d been blocked by for far too long, Shen Jiu had completely lost count of how much time she’d spent inside the caves.

She’d made progress, and her qi was clear and flowing fine, much better than it had been before she went into seclusion. Surely leaving now would be fine? She’d made fairly good progress, and even though she wasn’t skilled enough to know how much, it was still more than enough for Shu Mingru not to throw her off Qing Jing Peak.

Probably.

She decided that if he had complaints, then he could take them up with someone else.

When Shen Jiu entered the Lingxi Caves, it was late summer, when she now exited seclusion, she was pleasantly greeted by glimmering white snowflakes falling from the sky.

Looking around, Shen Jiu realized that someone was standing— waiting?— a bit away from the entrance to the caves.

The person looked deep in contemplation, they were dressed in a thick, brown winter coat, and they were holding what looked like a big bundle of fabric in their hands.

Shen Jiu quickly recognized the man as she continued to walk up to him and got a better look at his face; Mu Anwei’s face had matured into the face of a grown adult since she’d seen him last— he was handsome, and still very kind-looking.

“Mu-shidi,” Shen Jiu called, the man in question startled slightly at the sound of her voice but turned to face her with a delighted smile; she still didn’t understand why he always looked happy to see her. “What is shidi doing out here in the cold?”

The man smiled and held the bundle in his hands out towards Shen Jiu; hesitantly, she reached for it. “This shidi was told by Shu-shibo that Shen-shijie would be leaving seclusion today, so this shidi figured he’d come down and give shijie some protection against the cold.”

She looked down at what he’d handed to her: it was a thick winter coat almost identical to the one Mu Anwei was wearing, the only differences between them being the fact that while his was brown and embroidered with golden maple leaves, Shen Jiu’s was light green and embroidered with plum blossoms.

Wait.

How did her shizun know she’d be leaving seclusion today? Shen Jiu never gave him a set time for her secluded period!

Pushing those questions away— her shizun always knew too much anyway— Shen Jiu tried her best to smile gratefully at her shidi.

“This shijie appreciates Mu-shidi’s efforts,” she said while fiddling with the coat’s clasps; it was the softest thing she’d worn since— well, ever. “Could this shijie trouble Mu-shidi with checking her meridians?”

She finished speaking and held out her wrist, hopefully he wouldn’t disagree— that’d be embarrassing.

Smiling complacently, Mu Anwei nodded and took the offered wrist. He hummed as he sent a thin string of qi through her meridians— Shen Jiu really hoped it was a positive hum.

“Shen-shijie’s cultivation has progressed well,” he said before letting go of her, it didn’t provide much detail, but hearing that she had improved somewhat felt good. “Shu-shibo told this one to escort shijie back to Qing Jing Peak after she exited the caves; if Shen-shijie doesn’t mind, of course.”

As they begin walking towards the rainbow bridges, Shen Jiu takes in the sight of Qiong Ding Peak covered in snow. The pine trees unique to the tallest of Cang Qiong’s peaks are a delightful mix of dark green and white, it looks incredibly beautiful.

Hopefully we don’t run into any future sect leaders on this currently very peaceful walk, Shen Jiu thinks tiredly.

Shen Jiu snuck a glance at Mu Anwei in the corner of her eye, not turning her face away from the road; slipping and losing even more face for her peak would make it so Shu Mingru wouldn’t care if her cultivation had improved. “How long has it been?”

Mu Anwei’s kind smile doesn't waver, but it does grow a little sheepish. “Ah, Shen-shijie has been absent for a little under two years.”

Almost two years, that was longer than she’d intended and imagined.

Her shidi continues, “At around one and a half, Yue-shixiong started getting quite antsy. Did shijie not speak to him before leaving?”

Shen Jiu rolls her eyes at that. “This one didn’t think it was any of his business,” she says flatly. “Has every peak chosen a succeeding disciple yet?” It’s an obvious deflection, but she really is curious.

Mu Anwei brightens but almost slips on some ice as he tries to start talking, Shen Jiu can’t help but snort. “Every peak lord apart from Qing Jing’s has chosen their successor now,” he says with a nervous chuckle. “This one has been chosen as Qian Cao’s.”

He says the last part in an almost mumble, but Shen Jiu hears it loud and clear. She stops walking and turns her head— and smiles genuinely at the man.

He is a good healer, and even though she’d assumed the worst about his intentions at first— she now knew Mu-shidi is a good person. It had taken her a long while of thinking in seclusion to realize that.

She doesn’t know how any kind of friendship works— she only had Qi-ge’s and her friendship as a reference— but she’d like to think that she and Mu-shidi are some kind of friends, at least partly.

“Mu-shidi deserves to be the next lord of Qian Cao Peak,” she says, her smile still present but a little bit more restrained than a moment ago. “Shidi is very talented, this one is sure he’ll do great.”

That coaxes a startled expression out of her shidi and he flushes with embarrassment; she quickly puts a neutral mask on and lets her smile fade. “Shijie thinks too highly of this one…” Mu-shidi mumbles. “The courtesy name this one’s shifu picked is Qingfang.”

Shen Jiu hums in a sort of approval as they start walking again. “A nice name, it suits you.”

Mu Qingfang chuckles again, a red flush still present on his cheeks. “Thanking shijie for the compliments.”

They spend the rest of the walk to Qing Jing Peak in comfortable silence. It really is curious, Shen Jiu thinks, that she’d actually been able to find a person— a man nonetheless— that she didn’t feel the need to have a hand on her sword around.

It felt… strange; nice, but very strange— unfamiliar.

She decides that it’s not a completely awful feeling.

Qing Jing Peak is the only one that still has no succeeding disciple chosen. The statement lingers in the back of her mind; truth be told, Shen Jiu really had no ambitions of becoming the next peak lord when she joined Qing Jing Peak, but now…

… …

Well, it all rests on her shizun, and that old fox is more unpredictable than any other person in the entire sect— maybe even the entire jianghu.

Mu Qingfang leaves to go back to his own peak when the two of them reach Qing Jing Peak’s gates. He refuses to take the coat back when Shen Jiu starts to remove it, her shidi insists that it is a gift.

He’d left after saying that, leaving Shen Jiu to stare in disbelief after him; she’d never received a gift like this before this day, sure, Yue Qingyuan had tried to give her things— more-so bribes than just innocent gifts, in her opinion— but they never felt personal at all.

Maybe Mu Qingfang wouldn’t mind being friends, then, she muses as she turns to walk up the stairs.

It’s been two years since she went into seclusion; things shouldn’t have changed too drastically, though she didn’t dare to hope for even a second that any of her fellow disciples on Qing Jing had improved— in personalities and anything else imaginable.

After her little “scuffle” with Wu-whatever-his-name-was the year after she joined the peak, mostly all of the other people on Qing Jing stayed far away from her, and it seemed like they wouldn’t stop now either, even though it had been a very long time since then.

She didn’t really care— those fools were not worth her time; but something about the gazes they sent her way now were less hostile than before… they looked more intrigued than scared or angry— curious, even.

It made her skin crawl and the hairs on her neck rise. As she walked on the snowy stone paths of Qing Jing Peak, she avoided meeting anyone’s gaze, instead just walking fast and trying to make it to the peak lord’s residence before she started qi-deviating from irritation or something.

Eventually, she reached Shu Mingru’s residence; it looked the same as it had done when she left, nothing had changed at all. Too tired to care about any sort of rules, Shen Jiu opened the door and walked inside without knocking.

The house was quiet and empty, which wasn’t strange in itself— it was always quiet and empty, but now she couldn’t even feel her shizun’s always so present presence anywhere inside the house.

She was always able to tell if he was inside because his aura was just very present all the time (but somehow he still managed to sneak up on her).

“Shizun?” Shen Jiu called as she carefully walked through the house; she’d made sure to get all the snow off herself and her boots before entering, she wasn’t an animal. “Are you in here?”

“Ah, Jiu-er?” a voice from somewhere further in— or maybe out— calls. Shen Jiu starts to walk to where she’d heard it coming from. “This master is in the garden, Jiu-er is welcome to join.”

The Qing Jing Peak Lord’s garden; it was a place which was basically sacred ground. No disciples were allowed there unless they were invited by Shu Mingru himself. One time a disciple had apparently snuck in to look at the flowers, their shizun had her caned for her disobedience.

Maybe it was a trick, maybe Shen Jiu would receive the same doom as that disciple— but honestly? She really wasn’t scared of the peak lord, he annoyed her excessively, but he didn’t feel like an active threat.

She stepped down the path that led from the house to the garden, it was the only part of the peak that wasn’t completely covered in snow— her shizun must have some fairly strong heat or protection talismans around it to make sure not a single snowflake touched his precious plants.

Shu Mingru was crouching by a shrub of white jasmine flowers, the sweet scent of the flowers almost made Shen Jiu want to pick some and keep them on her all the time— but of course if she tried that, the old man would probably skin her alive.

“Jiu-er is right on time~” Shu Mingru sing-songed as he stood up and stepped closer to her, then looking her up and down before humming approvingly. “My little viper has grown. Come, join this master for some tea.”

He motions toward a pittoresque table located by a couple of bushes where pink peonies grew. Shen Jiu nods and took off her coat, deciding to put it down on the porch while they converse.

She sits down at the table and starts pouring tea for her teacher, who watches her with an unreadable sort of smile on his face. “Ah, Jiu-er really keeps getting more beautiful as the seasons go by,” the peak lord said wistfully. “And to think that just a few years ago, Jiu-er was just like a ferocious animal.”

His words make Shen Jiu’s hands clench around the teapot, but she still nods mechanically, setting the pot down before her subconscious gets the brilliant idea of throwing it at the man. “Shizun is too kind.”

To put it bluntly: Shen Jiu has never had a good relationship with her own face, or her body for that matter. Back when she was living in… difficult circumstances (calm your heart, calm your mind), she blamed her looks for landing her in that position.

(Qiu Jianluo loved to touch her face, and her… No. Don’t think about that part.

He always said that it was a shame a face like hers was wasted on a dirty slave.)

The last time she had looked in the mirror was the night she spent at the Warm Red Pavilion with her jiejies before the Immortal Alliance Conference six years ago.

Speaking of…

“The Immortal Alliance Conference two years ago, could Shizun tell this disciple who the winner of it was?” she asked, trying to distract herself from accidentally losing herself in old memories.

Shu Mingru grinned as he took an experimental sip of his tea. “Well, if Jiu-er had been there, she wouldn’t have been forced to ask this master about it.”

Shen Jiu bowed her head and looked down at her cup, the calming scent of the tea coaxed her into relaxing slightly. “This disciple apologizes; this one did not wish to lose Shizun or Qing Jing Peak more face.”

The man let out a ’hm’ as he flicked open his lavish fan, hiding the lower half of his face, leaving only his crinkled golden eyes to be observed. “Well, Bai Zhan’s Liu Qingge was the winner of the conference.”

Liu Qingge?

Shen Jiu could feel the thin thread of her patience slowly grow more and more worn out; so the waste of space would become Bai Zhan’s next peak lord.

How great…

“Ah, and Qingyuan-shizhi has managed to cultivate to mid stage core formation,” the old master said, his eyes crinkling even further: he was clearly enjoying himself. “I’m sure Qingge-shizhi and Qingwei-shizhi are well into early stage core formation as well.”

Because she was in the presence of her shizun, Shen Jiu couldn’t give in to the urge to scream in frustration.

If she was alone, she would have thrown herself on the floor and gnawed on her own limbs because of how envious she felt. She was nowhere near the level of those people, even if she didn’t know exactly at what level she was— she knew it wasn’t there.

She wanted to scream, but instead she just nodded and said, “That is impressive, their masters must be proud.” It didn’t sound genuine, because Shen Jiu really didn’t care enough to pretend in front of her shizun. He saw right through her anyway, so why should she bother?

Shu Mingru chuckled and leaned forward, resting his chin in his hand. “It really is. So, how has Jiu-er’s cultivation grown in seclusion? Jiu-er remembers what this master’s condition for her getting permission was, right?”

‘If Jiu-er does not reach this master’s expectations even after he so generously allowed her permission to cultivate in these caves, then she can forget staying on Qing Jing Peak.’

It had been a rare moment of the man dropping all of his facades and staring right into her with those empty, golden abysses that he called eyes. It had been a rare moment where Shen Jiu actually felt fearful of him.

The emptiness had disappeared quicker than it had appeared, but it was still deeply— extremely thoroughly— ingrained in her memory.

“This disciple remembers.”

Shu Mingru places his fan on the table and reaches his hand out palm up, indicating that he wants Shen Jiu to hand over her wrist for him to inspect.

“Then this master will have to trouble Jiu-er.”

She obliges instantly; she hates how instant it is.

The man hummed as he sent a strong string of powerful qi all throughout Shen Jiu’s meridians, inching into every crack and corner; he was a lot more heavy handed than Mu Qingfang had been.

“The damage is still present,” he said with a sigh, but he held a finger up when Shen Jiu was about to try and get a word in. “But. Jiu-er’s progress, despite her unfortunate circumstances, is acceptable. This master suggests that Jiu-er focuses more on her practical studies now.”

She didn’t get thrown away. That was the thing that Sean Jiu’s idiotic mind decided to focus the hardest on. Not the fact that she was only acceptable, but the fact that the old man wasn’t going to throw her away.

Either unaware or just uncaring of Shen Jiu’s miniature epiphany, Shu Mingru suddenly stands up and motions for his disciple to follow him. “This master has something to give Jiu-er.” He offers no more information than that; Shen Jiu knows she can’t say no, so she follows him into the house, remembering to pick up her coat as she does.

He brings her to the study, it’s the room they spend the most time in together; it might be a nice room, but to Shen Jiu it feels more like a glorified cage.

Picking up something from the desk, Shu Mingru then turns around and presents a neat pile of folded robes to his disciple, who in turn narrows her eyes at him.

The master snorts and pushes the gift into Shen Jiu’s slack hands. “It’s nothing dangerous, Jiu-er need not worry. This master’s disciple has worked dutifully, surely she deserves a reward?”

It’s a rhetorical question, and Shen Jiu doesn’t answer— even if it was an actual question, she doesn’t have a reply. A gift? Mu Qingfang had given her a gift, but they were friends (or something), she and her shizun were not friends— they didn’t like each other.

So why was he giving her a gift?

Even though she felt incredibly put off by the entire thing, Shen Jiu unfolded the fabrics and found herself holding a set of beautiful new robes in her hands.

The outermost layer was a robe in a soft azure green color, the sleeves and hems were decorated with jasmine flowers made of white thread, the inner layers were all white and made of expensive silk.

There was also a guan and hairpin, both made of white jade; it was nothing too extravagant (unlike the clothes), but it was far better than the shabby ribbons she’d been using in her hair up until this point.

The quality of the gifts were far better than anything a regular disciple would get— sure, she was a personal and favored disciple of her shizun’s, but this was…

…Strange, to put it simply.

Hesitantly, Shen Jiu looked up at her shizun through her lashes; he was hiding his obvious smile behind a fan, she glanced down at his other hand— in it he held another fan. “This disciple thanks Shizun for his kindness, this one isn’t worthy—”

Shu Mingru waved the hand with the second fan dismissively. “Nonsense, Jiu-er has worked hard, and she deserves new robes— the ones she’s been using until now simply will not cut it.”

Still feeling it was strange, Shen Jiu nodded stiffly.

“Go change in the side room, this master will be waiting for Jiu-er to return, he has a mission for her.”

She immediately bowed and walked (rushed) out of the study, leaving the conniving fox alone in the room to scheme or something.

In all honesty, Shen Jiu really didn’t know how to feel; Chen Fei wore robes like these, but that’s because she was the head disciple. Shu Mingru had never shown intentions of stripping his A-Fei of her title, but now he was showing Shen Jiu more favor than before— which he had been doing for quite a while before she entered seclusion, now that she thought about it.

Did it mean anything? Probably. Their shizun was always planning seven steps ahead, and he always had been for as long as Shen Jiu had known him.

He was completely unpredictable, and his motives were always unknown and often unreasonable.

But that didn’t matter now.

Shen Jiu stared at the bronze mirror that stood on the desk in the side room. It had been… a lot of years since she’d looked at herself in the mirror, as aforementioned. Whenever she had facial injuries she’d either just let heal on their own or she went to Mu Qingfang.

It wasn’t that she was scared, she just didn’t want to look. The last time she’d done it, the person in the mirror hadn’t even looked like her; Shen Jiu had been covered in layers upon layers of makeup, courtesy of her jiejies.

Just get it over with.

She huffed and walked over to the desk, and then just snatched the mirror and looked down into the bronze surface.

The face that stares back at her is unfamiliar, completely unfamiliar. She tried to remember how she’d looked when she was still living on the streets, but she can’t seem to find a single instance where she’d ever paid any attention to her own face.

The face in the bronze mirror is pale and unblemished (surprising, truly), it has a straight nose and generally sharp features; her green eyes are naturally narrowed, making it look like she’s always glaring even though she isn’t— not all the time anyway.

Objectively speaking, she is beautiful. And that wasn’t her being vain; if one looked at Shen Jiu’s face with the lense of objective beauty in mind, most would agree that she was beautiful.

Shen Jiu had her own unique opinions on her face, but decided to not dwell on it for too long— it would only disrupt the calmness that she had somehow managed to maintain for quite some time.

It took a bit of effort to put on the robes she’d been provided; after a while of fighting with the unfamiliar fabric, she finally managed to tie the last sash and then hung Xiu Ya at her waist (she definitely didn’t take so long because she’d accidentally touched the still-there brand on her back and stopped dead in her tracks).

Then she struggled with the hair accessories for far too long— she’d never really used things like them before! Not her fault!

When she observed herself in the mirror again, Shen Jiu really didn’t recognize herself. Instead of a street rat— a violent animal— she looked like a wealthy young mistress truly fit to be a disciple of Qing Jing Peak.

It was like wearing a new skin; she felt that it was kind of like how a snake sheds their skin once in a while.

(She looked exactly like the kind of person she’d spent many years envying.)

Instead of delaying further, she left the side room fully dressed in her new robes and reentered the study.

Her shizun was now sitting by the kneeling desk and looking through a scroll, his face set in his usual foxy grin… and by his side sat Chen Fei, staring at their master with stars in her eyes.

Shu Mingru wasn’t looking at her, but he was twirling a piece of her hair around his finger, and the head disciple’s cheeks were slightly red; it was a revolting sight for Shen Jiu’s eyes to witness.

Chen Fei’s accusations about Shen Jiu being Shizun’s bed-warmer seemed a little (very) hypocritical if one judged by this scene.

Shen Jiu didn’t say anything and just sat down on the opposite side of the desk, sneaking a peak at the scroll Shu Mingru was reading. It was upside down, but she could make out the words “illusion” and “desire.” Hm. What kind of mission was this anyway?

She looked up and accidentally caught Chen Fei’s disgusted eyes. The head disciple did not look happy to see that Shen Jiu was back from the caves. Shen Jiu really had no idea why (she had quite a few theories, actually).

As if sensing the bubbling animosity, Shu Mingru looked up and smiled at Shen Jiu before saying, “This is a simple task really, just an easy spirit extermination; but Jiu-er will be joined by two of her martial siblings from two other peaks.”

He finished speaking and rolled up the scroll, but instead of handing it to Shen Jiu, he tucked it back into his own sleeve. She shot him a confused glance; the master just chuckled, hiding his face behind his fan.

Chen Fei laughed as well, but it just sounded ingenuine; like when young, lovesick maidens giggle and swoon when the object of their affections says anything, even if it’s not funny.

Shen Jiu fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Where do we need to go? And which other disciples will this disciple be working with?”

Shu Mingru just hummed and waved a dismissive hand in the air. “You’ll be going to a place called the old Gui Plains, and as for who Jiu-er will be working with… let’s keep that a surprise, hm?”

She didn’t have the energy to argue against her shizun’s teasing mood, so Shen Jiu just nodded and just barely didn’t let out an exhausted sigh. “Yes Shizun.”

“This master has some very exciting news to share in three days,” the man said cryptically, looking out at the falling snowflakes through the study’s open window. Chen Fei’s face lit up and she looked away as well. “You’ll set off tomorrow at sunrise, your companions will be waiting for you by the foot of Qing Jing Peak.”

Shen Jiu cupped her hands and nodded at the two other people in the study. “Shizun, Da-shijie; this disciple will be leaving now.”

With that she exited the study once again and pulled on her coat before leaving the house. When the doors had firmly closed behind her, Shen Jiu summoned Xiu Ya out of its sheath and stepped onto the blade.

Exciting news? With the Ming generation preparing to retire in not that many years, the news probably related to the Qing Jing Peak Lord (finally) picking a succeeding disciple; Chen Fei’s giddy reaction almost confirmed her theory’s validity.

Shen Jiu continued to think about it as she started flying down the mountain; the cold winter air bit at her face harshly as she increased her speed, probably resembling a shooting star if she could be seen by people down below.

Before long, she finally reached her destination. The Warm Red Pavilion was still standing, looking as inviting as ever. Smiling to herself, Shen Jiu dusted some snow off her coat before walking up the stairs and opening the doors to the brothel.

Immediately after the doors closed, she was brutally pummeled into by something. Letting out an undignified yelp, Shen Jiu looked down and realized that it was Ning Lian; the woman was beaming up at her with a bright and absolutely delighted smile.

“A-Jiu!” Ning Lian exclaimed as she tightened her already crushing embrace. “You’re back! Everyone has missed you so much!”

“I’m back,” Shen Jiu confirmed and wrapped her arms around Ning Lian before letting out a content sigh; she was home.

After saying goodbye to everyone at the brothel the next morning— and being practically begged by both the meimeis and Lian-er to not go so soon— Shen Jiu flew back to the twelve peaks.

Her mood was surprisingly good as she was flying back to the peaks; her jiejies had gushed and fawned over both how much she’d supposedly grown and how pretty she’d gotten, and also over the beautiful robes she’d been gifted by her peak lord.

Hopefully the mission wouldn’t be too difficult (she mostly worried about the people she’d have to work with, honestly), and it would be a quick one; she hadn’t had any time to rest after seclusion.

Correction: she didn’t get almost any time at all to spend at the Warm Red Pavilion, she didn’t get to catch up with everyone that she wanted to.

But unfortunately, when one was a disciple of Cang Qiong Mountain, duty always came first, no matter how annoying the person who’d handed you that duty was; you weren’t allowed to say no under any circumstance, lest you want to lose face for the sect.

Shen Jiu’s good mood lasted all the way up until she’d almost reached the gates of Qing Jing Peak, because when she did, she realized who the two people waiting outside them were.

Her eyes narrowed as she came to an abrupt half around half a li away from them. The first one was a short and nervous-looking man who she recognized as the succeeding disciple of An Ding Peak, Shang Qinghua. He was staring into the horizon while picking at the qiankun pouches strapped to his belt.

Shen Jiu hadn’t spent much time around the man, but from what she’d gathered from the select few times she had been around him and heard from other people, he was… strange, that was a word she thought emulated him quite well.

The other person was someone who made her immediately stop and stare up at the heavens for a moment to try and understand why her shizun seemed to enjoy her misery so much.

Liu Qingge— no longer Xifeng, she reminded herself bitterly— was standing with a hand on Cheng Luan and staring at Shen Jiu with an unreadable expression.

The now succeeding disciple of Bai Zhan had gotten taller and more muscular since she’d seen her last, and was just as beautiful yet arrogant-looking as ever.

Shen Jiu and Liu Qingge’s dislike— or more so hatred— of each other was fairly common knowledge to everyone on the twelve peaks, especially Shen Jiu’s shizun. But the amount of times she’d gotten paired into groups containing the brute (despite everyone knowing they couldn’t work together) for missions was frankly ridiculous!

Stuck with an annoying peacock and a jittery rat for at least twelve shichen, Shen Jiu spitefully cursed every single one of Shu Mingru’s ancestors with all her might for him having been born and forcing her into this. He really must get off on making her miserable!

Shen Jiu forced herself to not show her irritation outwardly, repeating every single anger lessening mantra she could remember. “Shang-shidi, Liu-shimei,” she greeted with a half-acknowledging nod; she was still the most senior amongst them despite the other two’s succeeding disciple titles.

Shang Qinghua smiled, though it looked more frail than old porcelain. “Shen-shijie, have you slept well? Are you ready to set off?”

She didn’t bother responding verbally and just nodded, instead focusing her attention on Liu Qingge, who had narrowed her eyes at Shen Jiu and wrinkled her nose.

“You reek.”

For a second Shen Jiu just stared at her shimei, in the corner of her eye she could see Shang Qinghua drag a hand down his face, muttering quietly to himself.

“Oh? And exactly what does this shijie reek of? Liu-shimei should really enlighten this one,” she said, flicking one of her sleeves as she sheathed Xiu Ya.

Liu Qingge’s perpetual snarl deepened in a way that would have made anyone else look horribly unattractive, but for some reason it didn’t affect her looks at all.

“Of fragrances,” the younger woman replied curtly.

Shen Jiu snorted coldly, that was for sure bullshit if she’d ever heard it; she knew what Liu Qingge was really insinuating. “Fragrances? Surely that’s not something that this one is forbidden from using, or am I misunderstanding something?”

Trying to deflect what would surely turn into a nasty brawl, Shen Jiu moved closer to Liu Qingge, nearly invading her personal space, making the other woman grow red with anger.

“Well, shimei?”

”I—” Liu Qingge began, but quickly closed her mouth for some reason, just staring down at Shen Jiu with that unreadable (all apart frustration was unreadable anyway) expression from before.

Electing to ignore the other woman’s idiotic face, Shen Jiu turned away and looked down at Shang Qinghua instead, who looked like he really wanted to pull out a bag of melon seeds.

“Shall we set off? Shizun said that this one has to be back by noon tomorrow.” He didn’t, but she refused to spend more than a day with these fools.

Seemingly just remembering the mission they were supposed to go on, Shang Qinghua cleared his throat and laughed awkwardly. “Yes! Of course, Shen-shijie is right of course! Uhm, the map is right here let me just…” he mumbled in a panic.

He pulled a scroll out of his sleeves and unceremoniously shoved it into Shen Jiu’s hands before remembering to roll it out for her. He pointed at a circled area and said, “Here: the old Gui Plains; the residents in the village near this area have reported a bunch of missing people, and we are being sent to investigate.”

Shen Jiu nodded. “Any other relevant information?”

After scratching his head for a moment, Shang Qinghua said, “Ah, most of the people taken were either small children or adults around twenty to twenty-five?”

Well, that narrowed nothing down, great. Shen Jiu rolled her eyes as she handed the map back. “Did either of your peak lords give you any information aside from what Shang-shidi just told me?”

Both Liu Qingge and Shang Qinghua shook their heads, and Shen Jiu couldn’t help but let out a deep sigh. Her shizun hadn’t told her anything either, just the location’s name, was this some kind of test? To see how well they’d be able to do without any preparation and important information about the situation?

Fine. If Shu Mingru wanted to be an asshole, then he could laugh all he wanted, Shen Jiu would solve this mystery and kill whatever was terrorizing the village with or without anyone’s help.

Having decided that, she unsheathed her sword and gracefully bordered it. “Let’s go, any more time spent moping here will be taken out on the villagers.”

Chapter Text

okay hi sorry for forgetting this fic completely: i go where the autism takes me and now my roads have remerged with scum villain yet again. sorry it's been almost 2 years. i forgor
HOWEVER! i am working on a rewrite of this fic ! this one will stay up, but the new version will begin to be posted soon. so, stay tuned

- sam

Chapter Text

helloooo happy valentine's day to celebrate i will give you this fic about two lesbians falling in love despite all that comes between them, i promise that not too many lesbians were hurt in the making of this work. Happy Liujiu day!

https://ao3-rd-3.onrender.com/works/62994880/chapters/161325568