Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Day 0

POV - Light

Light stood at the bathroom sink, the sound of running water echoing as he stared down at the porcelain.

“Rem, do not kill him yet.” Light whispered the command under his breath, just enough muffled that he felt he could speak softly in the bathroom. Rem, who had been standing nearby the door watching him, widened their eyes minutely, but they maintained their composure and nodded slightly in confirmation. “I know you are concerned for Misa, but I have a plan. You will live a bit longer, it seems. Now go. Come back a bit later, I don’t want anyone to suspect that we met here.”

Rem left through the walls, unseen and unheard. Light gave himself one last look over in the bathroom mirror, put back together again after being caught in the downpour with Ryuzaki, and left his privacy to go back to where the others were convening after Ryuzaki’s phone call.

The way Ryuzaki had spoken, the way he had behaved… Light and he both knew how the day would end. They both knew what was coming. Ryuzaki would still try to prove that Light was Kira, even if it meant trying to break the rules listed in the Death Note. In doing so, he would either succeed, or die, and Ryukazi even seemed to know that the odds weren’t in his favour.

And originally, Light would have agreed readily. He desired nothing more than to kill L, Ryuuga, Ryuzaki, whatever his true name was, himself. And he still planned to do exactly that. However… Light recalled the resignation in Ryuzaki, as they sat in the rain. He remembered the sadness in his eyes as their game was swiftly coming to a close. Ryuzaki felt fear, felt acceptance, and he kept apologising, fucking apologising again and again… but still felt no doubt.

”Have you ever told the truth at any point in your entire life?”

”It’s sad… We’ll soon be parting ways.”

After everything! Light had planned everything perfectly to prove without a possibility of a doubt, that he wasn’t Kira! That Misa wasn’t the second Kira, even if there was proof that she had at least been working alongside them! It wasn’t fair, Ryuzaki’s stubborn resolve so tight and bullheaded that he couldn’t face the facts that Light had so carefully crafted before him. It was as if he’d simply ignored Light’s moves on a chessboard and continued playing as if those moves hadn’t happened; it wasn’t how things worked! L could not continue to defy him.

No, Ryuzaki would not die today. All his depressed moping about and getting rained on, theatrical death throes, would be for naught. Ryuzaki would live, he would be proven wrong, forced to turn from his prior convictions with his tail between his legs. He wanted Ryuzaki to tell the rest of the task force how wrong he was, and how Light was innocent and should be fully trusted. Such an admission from L… It would position Light to never be questioned again, and make way for him to create his new world free of bothersome suspicions. The detective L, nor the KTF had any way to win, not when Kira possessed a full deck, and knew just what to play. They knew about the notebook, about Shinigami… but those beings weren’t on their side, they couldn’t manipulate their actions as Light could.

Ryuzaki told the task force his plan, and it was fantastic.

Light knew precisely what he would do. That night, Rem appeared before him once more in his room, and he gave detailed, careful instructions to the shinigami.

-

POV - Ryuzaki / L

He wasn’t dead.

L breathed in, crisp cool air filling his lungs, and exhaled again, warmth ghosting near his face. The Shinigami, Kira (Light), Second Kira (Misa)... No one had taken his life. He was alive. Not so much as a scratch. The only pain he felt was the tightness in his chest from the worry of it. Watari, too, had remained in constant contact with him, both confirming each other’s still beating heart. It was late, now, the darkness outside coating his room in heavy stillness, but he could not sleep.

L hadn’t any proof that he was going to die, of course, but he had felt it, so deeply and to his core… Everytime he looked at the Shinigami, he was convinced of his quickly approaching passing. He thought it might simply be the effect of the shinigami itself, but Light, after his initial reaction, seemed to be completely unfazed by the creature, as if it wasn’t an unusual appearance to him… When L questioned Mogi in regards to the shinigami, he was certainly discomforted by it, but didn’t seem to experience the same sensation L did. Matsuda wouldn’t be able to contain himself if he’d felt something like that, and Souichirou told L to think more positively, that the killing notebook was now in their possession and they had made an important discovery not only for the case, but for the world.

What now? What was Light plotting? What was his next move? L had been so certain in how this day would end, that he didn’t know how to face the next. Had he been wrong this whole…

No.

Light was most assuredly going to try to figure out the name of the prisoner that was going to write in the Death Note. Perhaps he thought he could beat the timer now set over him. But how could he possibly do such a thing? L did not reveal which country they’d made the deal with, nor did they reveal the exact time it would be carried out. Light-Kira needs a face and a name. Misa-Kira needs just their face. He hadn’t seen Misa but through security footage since the capture and subsequent death of Higuchi, and Misa hadn’t seen him. Would that matter? She had seen him before Yotsuba, before her and Light’s detainment. Wouldn’t she still be able to kill him now? There was a second notebook, was there not? Why hadn’t she? What was he missing?

Frustrated, he balled his hand into a fist and punched at one of the pillows on his bed once before recollecting himself. Lashing out at inanimate objects wasn’t going to help. He gnawed his thumbnail as he continued to think deeply.

L was certain that Light had planned to re-obtain the Death Note, and perhaps had even planned for the possibility that L would touch it and learn of Shinigami and its power as well, but… Had he possibly planned for L to test the rules listed within the book?

”Ryuzaki, I understand why you want to test this book to see if everything it says is true, after all this is hard for all of us to wrap our heads around, but I must morally object to this! That book is evil, and I believe no human should be able to wield such power. It cannot be destroyed without killing us all, as the rule states, but it should be hidden away from the world in- in some bunker, locked away with the key destroyed, so no one can abuse its power ever again. And if there are others out there, then it is our responsibility to track them down and dispose of them too.”

That was what Light had said in response to the plan L had already set into motion to test the Death Note’s rules. The rest of the task force members had been quick to side with Light, speaking of morals and humanity and the like. It all meant nothing, since they were siding with and speaking of such things with Kira, a man who thought himself a god made to judge over all. L was able to temper their tones with the rational reasoning that these two, the one being killed with the Death Note and the one to do the killing, were both lined up to die anyways, and it would be no different to a firing squad, electric chair, or lethal injection, and better than those alternatives, this would actually assist in their investigation.

No one was happy about it (L included, whether or not it was his plan), but they all allowed the event to proceed as scheduled.

L didn’t fall asleep until the early hours of the morning, and when he woke again, he took another deep breath.

This wasn’t over yet.

Chapter Text

Day 1

POV - Ryuzaki / L

When L came from his room and wandered sullenly through the living space that was used on and off again by the rest of the task force and into the kitchen and dining room, he was surprised to find Light there, and a table set nice enough that it made him wonder if he had perhaps missed some holiday. Matsuda and Souichirou were there as well, seated and eating, and Watari stood a little ways away, speaking with Misa.

This is a distraction from her presence. The threat of death loomed ever closer over his head. He didn’t let his outward appearance reflect the internal conflict he felt as Misa made eye contact with him. She waved brightly, red lipstick smudged slightly from the half-eaten plate of food in her hand.

“What’s all this?” He asked, eyeing the spread of all sorts of foods across it as Light approached to greet him.

“Good morning to you too. You slept in really late today,” Light chided in a teasing tone. L’s eyes immediately tore from the table to meet Light’s.

It’s happened again. He’s changed again. He could tell just by the way he looked. How could no one else see? Not even his own father…

Light rubbed the back of his neck bashfully. “Watari arrived earlier this morning, and we talked about how it’s been a pretty stressful couple weeks… Of course, the war isn’t won, but the battle was, and Watari agreed that we should still celebrate the win of having gotten the book, and obtaining a huge piece of the puzzle, so we put together a little breakfast- er, brunch, by now- for everyone.” Light looked over at the others. “Watari really did the most work, aha,” he confessed. “But to be fair, he said he knew best what things you’d eat, so…” Light shrugged lightly. “Mogi will be here in a bit, too. My dad gave him a call and let him know.”

L thought he might lose his composure.

This was not the same man who, yesterday, had crafted the most carefully, artfully worded response to an accusation of never telling the truth once in his life. This was not the same man who had used faux moral outrage to elicit the desired response from the rest of the task force in order to position himself as the righteous compass of the team. Instead, this was the one who cared about those around him, who was actually invested in solving the Kira case, who could feel so passionately about his own morals and standards that it caused him to lash out at L. A regular, if intelligent young man, not a serial killer playing god.

“Ryuzaki, are you okay?” Light asked, tone lowering as though to prevent anyone else from hearing. “I’m actually starting to get worried…”

“Until the execution and subsequent test is complete, I’d like for you and Misa to remain here as before,” L said, ignoring Light’s question. “Particularly her, with Matsui or Moji accompanying her to any work events that are not postponable. You may tell her why, or keep it private and make up an excuse, it makes no difference to me.”

“Wh- Again?” Light questioned in a rushed voice, trying to keep his voice down despite his apparent agitation. “She’s been released for only a week, and you want her back in custody?”

He didn’t agree easily, as L predicted he wouldn’t. If he were still of the same mind he had been in when they’d first met, Light wouldn’t have argued. He would’ve nodded in agreement and surmised why L was asking this of him without much quarrel. Anything to prove himself innocent. “This is the final test. Please, Light,” L met his eyes again, studying him. This version of Light was easier to persuade when needed, at least. His eyes, uncharacteristically soft, widen slightly in surprise at L’s pleading tone. “Just for the duration of this test. Then, you will both be cleared of any possibility of being Kira. Humour me this one last time.”

Light faltered, as L predicted he would. “Alright, fine. But no more cameras in bathrooms and such, at this point it isn’t justifiable. And cut out all this gallows talk. I haven’t liked hearing you predict your death so insistently these past few days. We all are at risk here, and no one here is keen on you going down without a fight.”

No one? L mentally repeated in disbelief. But, he ended the conversation there and went to sit beside Matsuda at the table, feet pulled up and finger against his lip.

“Watari, are there pancakes?” He asked, looking around the table. Watari, without missing a beat, presented him with a plate, syrup, berries, and whipped cream dressing the little fluffy cakes.

“I already had some myself,” Matsuda said as L began eating. “They’re so good, like dessert in the morning!”

“Is that so?” L replied, disinterested, but trying to not, as Light had put it, linger on gallows talk. If he were to die this coming week or so, at least the food would be good beforehand, and he’d leave behind compelling evidence pointing squarely back to Light and Misa for either the task force or his successor to utilise. Now, it was a waiting game.

-

Day 3

POV - Light

Light sat on the couch in the living space, reading a book about kami, specifically shinigami, and trying to absorb as much information as possible. He didn’t know what was real and what was fantasy, but to be fair, before recent events he would’ve written it all off as fantasy, so any extra information was likely going to be beneficial.

Misa came through the door alongside Matsuda, and the moment she saw Light sitting there she exclaimed in excitement and rushed over to plop down next to him. “Hi Light, Mastu and I just got back from my shoot. What’re you reading?” She peeked over his shoulder to read as well.

“I’m doing research,” Light replied, tensing under her grasp.

“On shinigami?” She asked rhetorically. “I can tell you about them too, y’know. I’m really into the occult. It was a hobby of mine and my friends when we were kids.”

“Really?” Mastuda said with obvious intrigue, sitting on the couch across from where the other two sat. “That’s really interesting, Misa Misa, I never knew that about you.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t really talk about it in interviews and stuff, because my managers always tell me that it doesn’t really fit my idol persona and might scare some more superstitious or religious people off from being fans. But that’s okay, because I can always talk about my other hobbies and interests!” She flashed Matsuda a big smile.

“If your manager was smarter, she wouldn’t have let you be such an outspoken Kira supporter.” Ryuzaki’s voice made Matsuda and Misa jump in surprise as he entered the room silently. “That certainly did more damage than making a couple kids scared about ghost stories.” He leaned over Light’s shoulder to see what he was reading in a much similar manner to how Misa had, just without the overly clingy physical contact. “Hm.” He didn’t voice any thoughts about the reading material, but Light still managed to feel judged.

“When we see that shinigami again, I’m going to ask what, of all this, is true,” Light explained himself as Ryuzaki walked around to the front of the couches and sat by Matsuda, who quickly scooted over to make space. Ryuzaki slumped, and Light noted that he looked more tired than usual, but said nothing.

“And you think it’ll give you any straight answers?” Ryuzaki questioned.

“Look, asking questions and possibly getting answers is better than not asking any questions at all and remaining at a stalemate, you can’t disagree with that, Ryuzaki,” Light replied. “We already know there's more than one death note out there, so we need to find out as much as we can about shinigami if we want to have a chance of preventing this from happening again in the future.”

“I just wish you guys had let me touch the book! I want to see the shinigami,” Misa complained. “Matsuda said it was tall and purple and white and grey, with fangs. Sounds creepy-cute, actually!”

“More creepy,” Matsuda said, then quickly added awkwardly, “but, if you like creepy stuff, then sure…”

“Speaking of the thing…” Ryuzaki narrowed his eyes. “Where has it gone off to? The other two haven’t seen it all day either…”

“I am here.” Rem stepped through a wall and into the room. “I was resting. Besides, you all stare at me so. I would hate to… be a distraction…”

Ryuzaki’s posture immediately relaxed, or more accurately slumped again, the train of thought he had clearly been gearing up to fly down and gears that had begun churning all coming to a displeased halt. “I see.”

“Well then, since you’re here,” Light leaned forward, making Misa pitch over with a squeak, “are there any other kami in existence besides shinigami?”

Rem stared at him in a way that was even more unnerving than Ryuzaki’s stare, which was fair considering it was a literal god of death, before replying carefully, “That is not for me to say. I cannot speak on gods and devils that do or do not exist besides my own kind.”

“I guess that makes sense…” Light most certainly didn’t pout. “What about possession?”

“... What about it?”

“Can shinigami possess people?”

Rem once more seemed to carefully consider their answer before giving it. “While I personally do not currently possess any humans, nor am I aware of other shinigami choosing to do so, I cannot say that it is outside of the realm of what shinigami are capable of doing, depending too on how you define possession.”

“What is it saying, Light?” Misa asked, tugging on his sleeve. “Oh, please tell me!”

“Nothing of use,” Light replied, lifting her hand off of where she was wrinkling his clothes.

“Like I said,” Ryuzaki lolled his head to the side as though entirely disinterested. He likely was. “No straight answers.” He bit at his finger and stared off into nothing as he continued. “Rem, why are you still here? Your notebook has been relocated. I’m surprised you haven’t chosen to follow it.”

“You have not allowed anyone to touch it with their skin during its transportation, therefore none of those individuals will be able to see me. But you can.”

Ryuzaki huffed. “I didn’t realise that Shinigami desired company.” His hand dropped from his mouth and he stood, stretching. “For an otherworldly being with powers beyond human understanding, I’m afraid you’re a rather boring conversationalist.”

“Boring?” Misa repeated. “How could it possibly be boring?!” She leaned forward and pointed a finger at Ryuzaki. “As soon as you get that notebook back, you let me touch it too, got it Ryu?”

“Don’t call me that.”

And somehow, not being allowed to give Ryuzaki a nickname offended her more than being forced to stay at the task force headquarters again did. Light, not for the first time, found himself having to hold his tongue from scolding her for being focused on the wrong things.

Chapter Text

Day 6

POV - Light

Light was incredibly bored, which was a feat in and of itself considering the discovery of shinigami and the death note were still relatively fresh, and everyone coming and going from the headquarters were all wound up, waiting on news of any deaths relevant to such matters. There hadn’t been any more known kira-related deaths since the notebook was taken into their custody, but the knowledge that another notebook was likely still out there, laying dormant until future use, was hanging over them all like a bad omen.

He’d been in solitary confinement for months, then chained to L and unable to leave the building for a further three months, up until the events of Higuchi’s capture and subsequent death. Even Misa had been allowed to come and go more than himself. He’d been angry at Ryuzaki for being so apathetic and disinterested before (mostly because of the why behind it), but now… Light found himself begrudgingly beginning to feel some of the same ways himself. Tedium. Five months stuck pacing the same halls, staring at the same walls, and now he didn’t even have an active case to keep him preoccupied…

Although Misa could be a nuisance, she was at least someone who brought a spark of life to the quiet, sterile environment that had Light scratching to leave, but she wasn’t excellent company in his mind. Matsuda was nice and friendly, but conversation with him always felt terribly forced. Light simply didn’t feel engaged in any of the topics he was interested in. If anything, Misa and Matsuda had far more in common, and most of her visits with Light ended in her and Matsuda visiting instead, even if she did keep an iron grip on Light throughout.

Through his absent-minded wandering of halls, Light found himself approaching Ryuzaki’s room. Figures. He was thinking about him, after all. Light only hesitated for a moment before rapping on the door lightly, wondering if Ryuzaki was even in his room in the first place.

He was.

“Light?” Ryuzaki seemed genuinely surprised to see Light standing there. “What is it?”

And, well, Light wasn’t sure how to answer that question. What was it? That is, why was he knocking at Ryuzaki’s door? Because he was bored, certainly, and Ryuzaki was very much not a boring person to be around…

“Misa, Matsui, and Mogi are watching a movie. Some low budget thing called ‘The Princess Project,’” he said, realising even before he said it that it wasn’t really an answer to Ryuzaki’s question. “I don’t particularly enjoy the genre, so…” And then Light paused and cocked his head to the side. Ryuzaki hadn’t looked particularly well since the day they had been caught in the rain, but today… Come to think of it, Light hadn’t seen Ryuzaki in the past couple days. Perhaps that was why he had subconsciously sought him out, after months, almost half a year, of constant contact. What was that psychological phenomenon called? The Mere-exposure effect? Did that apply here? Either way, Ryuzaki looked worse for wear, even compared to his usual disorderly appearance. “Are you okay?” Light asked, now distracted from anything he’d been trying to come up with to say previously. “Did you catch a cold from standing out in the rain? I warned you-”

“No, I didn’t.” Ryuzaki didn’t quite snap, but it was clear he wasn’t in a particularly chatty mood. It was potentially the fewest number of words to ever leave Ryuzaki’s mouth in one sitting.

Light glanced over at Ryuzaki’s hand that still rested on the doorframe, and saw where his nail and finger biting habit had obviously worsened recently, and when he blinked, it was laboured, as if his eyes simply didn’t want to open again. Tired again. Or still. A realisation hit Light.

“When was the last time you slept?”

Ryuzaki didn’t even pause to think about his answer. “Three nights ago, five hours..”

Light pinched the bridge of his nose. “What- okay, and before that?”

That time, Ryuzaki did hesitate, clearly much less sure of that answer.

“Unbelievable. You realise that whether or not you sleep will have absolutely no impact on the death note and whatever death row inmate you have writing in it, right? You being awake isn’t going to change any outcomes,” Light chided. He was vaguely reminding himself of his own mother, chastising Sayu when she stayed up watching her dramas. You have to sleep if you want to do well in school, sweetie. A tired brain is a slow brain.

“I’m having trouble,” Ryuzaki admitted, mumbling, letting go of his door and turning back into his room, leaving Light to enter behind him. It was just about as messy as it normally was- nothing atrocious, but still made Light want to start tidying. He didn’t, since most people would consider it rude. “You see, it’s hard to allow any precious moments of life to be lost to unconsciousness when you believe that you’re going to die at any moment.”

“Why would you think that?” Light questioned.

Ryuzaki sat on the edge of his bed, slumped in on himself. It was the same sort of defeated body language Light had seen from him before, the day in the rain, and Light hated it. It was so far removed from the self-assured, carelessness of his usual demeanour that Light really didn’t know what to do with it. “Truthfully? I felt like I was due to die a week ago, and yet I am still here. It’s a strange feeling, as I can’t say I’ve ever been one to necessarily believe in strict fate or destiny, however I do feel a bit directionless at the moment. What with the discovery of shinigami, I rather feel that my entire world view has been impacted. I wonder if it is that discovery that has made me feel this way, and if that’s the case, I worry I’ll never feel differently again. Tell me, Light, what sort of life is one constantly shrouded in the fear of impending death?” Ryuzaki didn’t look at Light as he spoke, instead absently stacking a few various bottle caps on his bedside table.

“It sounds like not much of a life at all,” Light admitted, but continued, “however, we are all going to die one day. That is an unavoidable fate that befalls all living things. At least, all earthly beings. Imagine if all of humanity walked around constantly dreading their death, instead of celebrating their life? I mean, after my dad-” Light found the words ’pretended to try and kill me’ to be caught in his throat, for obvious reasons. “When my dad, uh, y’know. Got me and Misa out of confinement… When that happened, I mean sure, I definitely felt like, well, I sympathise with how you feel. But then, when you don’t die… You have to accept that and continue on living. Because, I mean, isn’t constantly being in fear of dying, to the point that it prevents you from continuing to live your life, a sort of death in and of itself?”

“Are you suggesting that I am already dead, then?” Ryuzaki looked at Light curiously.

“I’m suggesting that you not allow death to take you so easily,” Light replied carefully. “If you die soon, if that’s to be your fate, then so be it. But don’t kill yourself from sleep deprivation and fear before you even get to the finish line. That’s not like the Ryuzaki I know.” Light suddenly gave a small laugh, quickly raising a hand to his mouth to stifle it. “Sorry, just, saying that… When your real name isn’t even Ryuzaki…”

And, to Light’s surprise, Ryuzaki cracked a small smile, something that was like finding clams in a field. “Yes, well, even so, I suppose you are right…”

“Heh. So, be honest, if I go, are you going to go to sleep?” Light asked.

“Hm? Oh, sure.” Light sighed at the noncommittal response. He flipped off the overhead light in the room and looked over the books resting on top of the dresser before picking one. He walked over to the opposite side of the bed from where Ryuzaki was sitting, clicked on the little lamp, and sat down, back against the wall and legs stretched out, before opening the book and beginning to read in the dim light nonchalantly. It was a familiar sort of movement, a sort of call back to when they were handcuffed together and their sleeping arrangements were essentially two beds on either side of a nightstand, although the roles reversed as Light was the one staying awake after the other. “... Light?”

Light waved a hand absently without looking up from the book. “Don’t mind me. I’m just making sure you actually sleep.”

Ryuzaki stared at Light for an unnecessarily long moment before slowly laying down on the empty side of the bed. “You’ll wake me if any news comes through?”

Light contemplated just lying and saying that he would, but he knew how much Ryuzaki hated liars, and how he already thought him incapable of being genuine. So instead, he replied with the truth. “I’ll wake you if there’s anything urgent. If it can wait, then I won’t.”

“I believe you,” Ryuzaki replied simply, and within minutes, his breathing slowed and evened as he drifted off to sleep, and per usual he ended up flipping from his back to sleep on his stomach almost as soon as he was fully under.

Light finished the entire book (it was a murder mystery, which was somehow surprising and yet not at all surprising to be a genre Ryuzaki enjoyed). He’d figured out who the killer was within the first 4 chapters, and how they’d be caught by the 6th. Still, it was an entertaining read, and if Ryuzaki was awake, he’d ask him how long it’d taken him to discover the same details. But, he was still fast asleep, slightly snoring as one cheek was pressed into the pillow, his hair fanned about in a mess of dark strands about his face.

Light considered getting up and leaving, but something held him back. Light really didn’t want to risk waking him, not before he’d had a full night’s rest. Light was the softer sleeper of the two, but that didn’t mean Ryuzaki was a rock. Light yawned, glancing at his watch to see that it was past the time he normally turned in for the night anyways, and so he simply shimmied about to get more comfortable in the bed, silently wished that he was wearing proper sleeping clothes, and shut his eyes to get some sleep himself. There was a familiarity to the soft sounds of Ryuzaki sleeping nearby, although closer than any time before. Light fell asleep quickly.

Chapter Text

Day 7

POV - Ryuzaki / L

Misa was crying in the kitchen, being comforted weakly by Matsuda. L, who only went into the kitchen to get the frosted popcorn Watari had brought last time he was there, immediately turned around to walk back away, not interested in finding out why she was in shambles. Unfortunately, both individuals saw him before he could make his silent escape, and they deemed it necessary to inform him what was going on, despite him not asking.

“This is all your fault, Ryuzaki! I lost out on a role because I haven’t been ‘making enough public appearances!’ Do you get it? I’m losing my popularity! I’m supposed to be famous, directors and designers are supposed to be fighting to have me in their shoots, not the other way around!” Misa cried.

“Aw, Misa, it’s okay! We only have a week left, and then you can go out as much as you want! And remember the interview you’re having for the Teen Trends magazine? You still have other things lined up, it’s okay that you didn’t get this one. There’ll be more opportunities,” Matsuda comforted her.

“More than a week, I imagine. After all, the exact date of the execution is unknown by anyone in this building, and will remain so until the 13th day after the fact.” His clarification only seemed to make the other two more emotionally charged. “It hasn’t even been a full year,” L rolled his eyes, turning back into the kitchen. If he was to be forced to hear this, then he might as well still get his snacks. “Plenty of idols maintain their fame after years in service and out of the public eye.” What sort of chips did Light like? Nori Shio or Ponzu Ginger? Bbq? Cheddar?

“Yeah, but I’m not in the service!” Misa countered angrily.

Matsuda quickly cut in again. “Maybe for your next public appearance, you could have something eye-catching and different from your normal appearance. Y’know, something to stir renewed attention? You could… dye your hair?”

“Huh?” Misa was thrown off by the suggestion enough that she stopped crying, and actually seemed to consider it. She raised her hands up and clutched at the ends of her bright blonde hair. “Change the colour? Well… Matsu… Y’know, I think that could be a great idea! What about auburn? Or maybe purple?”

“You’d look really good with an orange-red colour,” Matsuda encouraged her, clearly relieved at her change of tone. “We can dye it before your interview if you want?”

“I don’t care what you two do, just don’t stain anything…” L left them to their devices, taking the snacks with him.

He wandered back the way he came, passing through the sitting room and down a hall, until he arrived in a room equipped with entertainment options. Matsuda had called it a ‘mancave’ despite nothing gender-oriented being present, and Misa had called it a ‘home theatre’ despite there being more than a screen in it. Mogi’s assignment might’ve been the most accurate, calling it a ‘game room,’ as there was a dart board, tennis table, and a gaming system hooked up to the oversized TV, except for Soichiro deigning it the ‘rec room,’ which L supposed out of all the options was the best, although he didn’t really care what people called it, as long as it fulfilled its purpose of preventing anyone from experiencing burnout and bothering him about it while living in the headquarters. Mogi and Matsuda had used it the most out of anyone, Mogi being a great dart toss, and Matsuda teaching anyone willing to participate how to play foosball.

Light was already there, looking over some of the movie options available inside the case. L had a pretty good guess on which ones he might pick for them to choose from, and he was correct when Light presented him the choices. They’d spoken earlier that day about the book Light had chosen to read the night before, after L had woken from a solid 14 hours of uninterrupted sleep, and had agreed that although predictable, it was entertaining nonetheless. Light apparently enjoyed mystery-based movies too, but didn’t watch them frequently as the rest of his family had much less interest. L didn’t mind them, though.

And so, L was sent to get the refreshments while Light picked the movie.

If Light is Kira, then liking thrillers, much like him being intelligent and being related to someone working within the police force, could’ve impacted his development and how he responded to obtaining something as powerful as the Death Note. Conversely, someone like Kira might think of thriller and mystery movies as beneath him, a shallow imitation of a true power struggle between a killer and those hunting him.

It wasn’t very Kira-like for Light to ensure he got a full night’s (and then some) sleep. Kira would prefer him sleep deprived, mentally slower and at a distinct disadvantage. Nothing had occurred while he slept.

Or perhaps it was just a movie genre preference, and nothing more.

L picked from the three Light had selected, and it was the movie he’d known they’d end up watching since they’d decided to do so.

“I couldn’t recall which you preferred,” L said as he presented the two chip options to Light. He grabbed one and settled into the couch, trading it for the movie, wordlessly assigning L to be the one to set it up. L, in turn, dropped his popcorn and the other bag of chips on top of Light unceremoniously, and ignored his light-hearted complaint over it. What L didn’t ignore was Light retaliating by opening up his bag of popcorn and beginning to eat it. L quickly swiped the bag back indignantly.

“What?” Light asked with exaggerated faux innocence. “I thought you didn’t mind sharing your food.”

“Yes, but you didn’t ask,” L replied. “That’s just impolite.”

Light shrugged and turned up his nose. “It’s too sweet, anyways. Popcorn is meant to be salty.”

“You think everything is too sweet,” L countered, eating a piece himself as he settled onto the couch next to Light. “By the way, Misa and Matsuda are going to have different hair colours within the next week,” he added as the ads before the movie began to run.

Light gave him a surprised look, but after only a moment’s consideration, nodded. “I suppose I expected Misa to have some sort of idea like that, for her to boost attention for her career, right? If Matsuda is helping her, I can certainly imagine her convincing him to go along with it as well.”

“It was Matsuda’s idea, actually,” L corrected. “And before Matsuda, she’ll probably ask you to do it with her instead of him.”

“Huh? Why me?” Light questioned, already showing agitation at the idea.

L ate another piece of popcorn. It was strawberry flavoured. “Because you’re her boyfriend.”

“No, I’m not,” Light replied. “I don’t know how many times I have to say it, just because she likes me doesn’t mean I want to be in a relationship with her.” He sounded defensive, as he often did when faced with Misa’s fixation on him, but somehow he sounded even more so this time, potentially growing irate due to the repetition of it.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” L replied in a teasing monotone. “I’m just telling you what she’s going to say.”

The movie began, and the two quietened down to watch. Although ‘quietened down’ was inaccurate, as they still spoke, only now it was to share their predictions and debate choices on the director and writers parts.

L wondered when the last time he had simply ‘hung out’ with someone like this was. He wasn’t sure.

-

POV - Light

Light was annoyed with Ryuzaki. Besides the obvious being-forced-to-stay-at-the-headquarters and maintaining-that-he-was-Kira, both of which were old hat by that point. No, instead he was annoyed that Ryuzaki, Mogi, Misa, and even his own father continued to call Misa his girlfriend, whether directly or indirectly. He didn’t even really get on with her in a friendly way, and she never respected his boundaries and personal space, constantly saying and doing things that frankly made him very uncomfortable. He had never been a particularly tactile person in the first place, even his own family knew he wasn’t much of one for that sort of thing, and all of Misa’s grabbing and tugging and hugging and hanging made the hair on his neck stand up worse than seeing the shinigami float through walls. At least the shinigami kept a respectful distance.

Even Ryuzaki, who was at this point known by everybody within the task force as having a warped sense of decency and boundaries, who Light had been handcuffed to for an extended period of time, respected his personal space more than Misa. Ryuzaki sat on the couch next to him, knees pulled up to his chest per usual, eating his popcorn one piece at a time, eyes glued to the screen. There was easily 60 cm or so between them, plenty of space for Ryuzaki to shift about as he pleased without knocking into Light. If it had been Misa, she’d probably have plopped herself into his lap. The thought just frustrated Light more, and Ryuzaki noticed the shift.

“Light, are you alright?” He asked, cocking his head to the side as his gaze strayed from the screen over to Light.

“Yeah, sorry,” he replied. “Just… thinking about how to make Misa understand that I don’t want to be with her.”

Ryuzaki, satisfied with that answer, returned his attention to the screen. “Hm. A near impossible feat, I think. I can only wish you luck with such an endeavour.”

“Right…” And Light found himself wondering how he’d have coped if he’d been handcuffed to Misa instead, or if Ryuzaki was nearly as handsy as her. Thinking about it, the only times they’d really had any physical contact beyond a temporary attention grabbing touch or graze was when they had fought, and the time Ryuzaki had insisted on giving him a foot massage as an apology for getting them both rained on. He couldn’t really imagine Ryuzaki being the touchy type, but then, maybe he was just being respectful of Light’s unspoken wishes. What if Ryuzaki was actually a hugger? He’d said before that he’d never had any good friends, and it seemed as though the closest thing to family he had any regular contact with was Watari. Light couldn't really imagine Ryuzaki and Watari hugging.

“You’ve stopped paying attention to the movie,” Ryuzaki said, surprising Light.

“Oh, yeah, you’re right,” Light replied, feeling somewhat embarrassed over how his mind had wandered to such things.

“It’s a shame, I hate to tell you that you’ve missed something vital because it ruins my entertainment of watching you predict what is to come in the movie, but… You did miss something vital,” Ryuzaki said, sounding genuinely disappointed. “I hope you’re not plotting any murders while I’m trying to take your advice and enjoy my time before I die.”

Light gave a half-hearted, half-amused laugh. “No, Ryuzaki. Rewind it a bit, I’ll pay attention from now on.”

“Good, I’d hate to be watching a movie alone,” he said, giving no indication as to what he may have thought about Light’s zoning out. He rewinded it and hit play again. Light swung his legs up onto the couch, and if the 60 or so cm between them quickly shrunk because of it, neither man made an audible note of it.

Chapter Text

Day 8

POV - Soichiro

Soichiro felt bad about being able to go home and see Sayu and Sachiko while Light had to continue being kept within the task force headquarters, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t take his opportunities to see them when he could. Sayu was growing up so quickly over this busy, insane year, and Sachiko, ever-patient and understanding, was obviously stressed, but doing her best to be strong for Sayu, just as Soichiro was for her in turn. If she loved him less, he was certain she’d have left him at this point. He felt lucky to have her.

She asked after Light, of course, and Soichiro had to remember the story he’d been instructed to keep up with according to L; Light was in hiding for his own safety due to his own early private investigation into the Kira case putting him in a dangerous position. He hated to lie to her and Sayu, but it was in everyone’s best interest.

When Soichiro returned to headquarters, he was greeted in the foyer by Light. “Hey dad,” he said. “How are mom and Sayu?”

“They’re alright. Sayu complained that her grades are suffering without you there to help her,” Soichiro responded, fixing his glasses on his nose with a small grin. “And your mother told you to call her more frequently.”

“Ah, right, I will.” Light followed him as he walked through the hall, towards the room he’d deigned as his own personal office. “I’m actually glad you’re here, I have something I wanted to talk to you about.”

Soichiro sighed as he shrugged off his coat, hanging on the back of the door. “Has there been a development in the Kira case?”

“No, it’s not related to work, it’s… personal.” Light was uncharacteristically hesitant as he spoke.

“Oh!” Soichiro paused what he was doing, knowing that he was visibly surprised for a moment before returning to his usual demeanour. It wasn’t particularly common for Light to come to him for advice. Not because they had a poor relationship, but because Light just didn’t often require much assistance with things. Even when he was little, he was always so independent. Soichiro was struck with a memory of Light as just a little kid, walking into the living room with a bandage somewhat sloppily applied to his leg.

”What happened?” Soichiro immediately rushed towards him to see the damage.

“I fell off my bike,” Light had said rather calmly for a boy his age with an injury. “It’s not bad, I got the medkit from the bathroom. But my tire popped, and I can’t fix that by myself.”

“Light, you should’ve come right to me when you got hurt,” Soichiro half chided. “I’ll have to look at your leg to make sure it’s cleaned properly, and make sure you don’t need stitches.”

Light had pouted, and explained that he did in fact clean it properly, and knew that it was okay. All he wanted help with was his bike, and even then it was only because he couldn’t do it himself.

Very little changed. But Soichiro was just happy his son would still come to him when he felt he needed help. Soichiro wasn’t sure he still deserved that.

He set his briefcase on his desk and leaned back onto the edge, hand in his pocket. “Alright, what is it?”

“It’s about Misa.” Once again, Soichiro was surprised, but less obviously this time. Girl problems… Really? “As you know, she claims to be in love with me. I don’t feel the same, and I’m growing tired of having to abide by her fantasies.”

“Son, are you asking me for advice on how to break up with your girlfriend?” Soichiro asked incredulously.

Light was obviously bothered by that question, the way he narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms defensively. “No, that’s the problem. I don’t know how she’s managed to convince everyone that we were together at any point, but that’s simply inaccurate. Yes, I did give her a chance, and attempted to begin a relationship, but we were never exclusive and I’ve made it clear to her that I don't feel the same way. But it seems like no matter what, she has a narrative of what we are that she believes is true.” Light raised a hand to his head, brow furrowed. “Honestly, I don’t really care what she says really, but I’m bothered by how entitled she feels to my personal space because of this. I mean, you recall how she will just… Sit on me, and she’ll just walk into my room without knocking, and she’s always hanging off of me…” Light shook his hair out of his eyes, trying to not pout by instead glaring, gaze directed at the bookcase instead of his father. “Honestly at this point it’s more of a nuisance than Ryuzaki saying I’m Kira.”

“Don’t say that,” Soichiro chided quickly, not amused by Light’s half-attempt at humour. Every time he had to hear the notion of his son possibly being Kira, it sent a cold shock of dread and exhaustion through him. He hated how Ryuzaki had managed to get into his son’s head and somehow make him say it just as easily as Ryuzaki himself. Soichiro would never be able to. But, he continued with the topic at hand. “It sounds like you have quite an unusual situation. You know, most young men your age would give anything to have a pretty young model in love with them like Amane is with you.”

Light sighed, for all the world sounding like he’d been given yardwork to do. “Yeah, so I’ve been told.”

“Well, I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that you should simply be honest and straightforward with her. It’s really the only thing you can do in such circumstances. I imagine what you’re really asking is how to do so in the least upsetting way.” Soichiro guessed.

“Sort of… See, I’ve already been trying to tell her as politely as I can, but I feel that that’s what has led to the current situation. Because I’ve been too non-confrontational, she seems to have taken that as permission to continue pushing boundaries.” Light seemed to be choosing his words carefully, but Soichiro got the hint- he really was at his wits end with a girl he didn’t like back, and was having trouble maintaining his manners.

“I see…” Soichiro gave his moustache a thoughtful stroke. “To be honest, I’ve seen the way you interact with her, and although I believe you when you say you’ve had these conversations with her before, I believe the issue is that you’re not enforcing those sentiments.”

“What do you mean?”

“You say you don’t like her, but then are passive when she-” he waved his hand slightly awkwardly, “-y’know, makes advances. Instead of simply saying you don’t love her back, but then letting her do as she pleases, be clearer in your communication. Say specifically what things you don’t want her to do, and you can always relate it back to the previously stated reason. ‘Don’t, uhh, try to kiss me, because I’m not interested in you in that way.’” Soichiro felt awkward saying such things, but he would continue to if it’d help his son. “Don’t just allow her to do as she pleases. On the bright side, since you’re no longer handcuffed to Ryuzaki, you also have the capability to simply leave the situation as well. You don’t have to put yourself or keep yourself in uncomfortable situations.”

Light took that and digested it quietly for a minute.

“I don’t want to be made into a bad guy just for rejecting her,” he finally said. “Everyone else likes her. I don’t want to upset her in a way that would negatively impact the dynamics of the task force.”

“Oh Light,” Soichiro shook his head slightly, raising a hand to his brow in a similar movement to how Light had before. The apple not falling far… “I wouldn’t worry about that. You two are both still quite young, and will have plenty of opportunities for future relationships. And, it’s perfectly normal for puppy love to be over-emotional. As for the rest of the team, well, I doubt something as petty as a break up- or whatever you choose to call it- would have that large of an impact.”

Chapter Text

Day 8 cont.

POV - Ryuzaki / L

Why was the entire damn task force in shambles??

He’d vaguely heard Misa yelling that afternoon, but as he made his way towards the kitchen to find something to eat, he hadn’t expected it to be an especially unique episode of hers.

Matsuda was flitting about like a nervous bird. Mogi had a cold towel laid over his face as he reclined on the couch. Light was sitting on the opposite couch, ruler-straight posture and crossed arms indicating how clearly pissed off, but trying to stifle it, he was. His eyes were closed, like he was trying to think his way into a different location. Soichiro was nowhere to be seen. There was glass on the floor, a shattered cup. He’d have to watch his feet, then. He wriggled his toes absentmindedly at the thought.

“Good afternoon,” L said blandly.

“Watari went to get a broom,” Light said, without even opening his eyes. L was less surprised, more mildly pleased that Light once again was able to tell his thoughts so clearly without so much as a glance over.

Mogi, meanwhile, lifted a corner of his towel from his face to say, “Ryuzaki, I think I’m going to take sick leave for the rest of today, and maybe tomorrow, if it’s all the same to you.”

“Certainly,” L nodded. “After all, this is just the waiting period for my test still. Very little to do. Please keep your ringer on in case of any developments, thank you.”

As Mogi retired for the time being, Matsuda took it upon himself to walk over to where L still stood a fair distance from the glass to fill him in on the afternoon’s events. “Misa and Light broke up,” he said under his breath. Watari entered the room and began tidying as Matusda spoke. “Er, or as Light said, he told her to stop saying they dated when they never did. He- he basically told her to stop trying to flirt with him and all that. She… didn’t take it well.”

“I imagine so.” L’s gaze on Light hardened. Just what are you playing at…?

“Apparently he had a talk with his dad about it beforehand. Yaga- er, Asahi is actually with Misa right now. I think he’s trying to help calm her down.”

“Why not you?” L questioned.

Matsuda blinked blankly. “Huh? Me?”

Watari paused before leaving the room to hand L a pair of house slippers with a no buts expression. L sighed and accepted them. “Yes, well, you are her favourite person here, besides of course Light,” he said as he slipped on the footwear. He wriggled his toes again, finding immense displeasure in the restriction. It was soft, though, and flexible. He’d deal with it for the moment. “Although, now that you mention it, you probably wouldn’t be very good at comforting her. Asahi has a daughter, so I’m sure he’s feeling parental over it all.” As L spoke, Matsuda’s expression went from shallow curiosity to bashfulness, clearly having some feelings about being called Misa’s favourite person. Of course, it was no secret to L that he had a crush on her. He did wonder if he and Misa would end up in an entanglement, despite her fixation on Light, now that he was no longer putting up with her, if Matsuda was able to draw himself up enough to initiate and Misa was desperate enough for someone to love her to accept.

Feet now protected from any potential stray glass shards, L sat on the couch directly beside Light.

“Go on then, how does this make me more Kira-like?” Light bit out. L eyed the lines of his shoulders, the furrow of his brow. He was having quite a rough day, it seemed.

“It doesn’t,” he replied honestly. Light, in turn, opened his eyes and stared at L in surprise. “In fact, it’s distinctly unKira-like. It seems you are still full of surprises for me.”

“Right, well, I’m sure I don’t need to explain this, but I’ll still say it anyway; I’m not willing to play along with entertaining Misa’s infatuation any longer. I know it was helpful at the moment while investigating Yotsuba, but now it’s gone on too long, and there isn’t any reason to continue.”

“I understand,” L replied. His thumb was in his mouth again, and his mind was racing, trying to run variables on how this would impact the future of Light and Misa as suspects. If Misa was the second Kira, and the first Kira rejected her, he was certain that her instability could cause many problems. Would she turn coat and attempt to eliminate him and take over the role of "god" for herself, or would the rejection of her new life's purpose send her into a self-destructive spiral? Would that even matter if she didn't have her memories of being the second Kira? L knew that there was still the second death note out there somewhere. Did she still have access to it? The 13 day rule… It was only a short while now until he was certain...

-

Day 9

POV - Matsuda

Misa had been in bed crying all day.

Lights off, curtains drawn, face down in her pillow.

Matsuda had already been by twice to check on her, both times letting himself in to the same scene. He was really worried about her. He knew she could be emotional, and he was honestly concerned she might hurt herself somehow. When he mentioned it to Ryuzaki, even he had agreed it was a possibility (far too nonchalantly), so that was extremely discomforting. Matsuda wasn’t mad at Light, he had done his best to remain polite to Misa throughout the confrontation, and Matsuda didn’t expect Light to stay unhappy in his interactions with Misa, but somehow he was upset. He hated seeing Misa like this, and knowing that it was caused by Light, even unintentionally, was hard to reconcile, especially considering how much he liked Light, too. Everyone knew that Misa was… sensitive. Handling something like that is never easy. Overall, the situation was just extremely unpleasant.

“Misa?” Matsuda knocked at the door before entering as he had before, food in hand. “I’ve brought you-” too late for lunch, too early for dinner, “-food?” Ryuzaki had been right, of course. He felt lost trying to comfort her, but he did know that not eating anything all day wasn’t good, so he got her some of her favourite takeaway food that she’d mentioned to him before. His mom had always comforted him with favourite foods.

“I’m not hungry.” Misa’s thin voice, reedy from crying, came softly from between the covers of her bed.

Matsuda placed the food on the first available surface he was able to make out, then made his way carefully in the darkness towards the window. “You might not feel hungry, but you do still need to eat a little bit.” He opened the blinds just a bit, just enough to remind the bedroom that it was, in fact, still daytime.

Misa didn’t sit up, but she did turn in her bed to face Matsuda and the rest of her room, red-rimmed eyes framed by black makeup stains squinting against the little light. Her hair was undone, the little ponytails traded for a mess of disarray that Matsuda knew in any other circumstances she’d be embarrassed to be seen with. She looked pale, tired, and just sad. It pulled on Matsuda’s heart.

“Ah, there you are,” he said, trying not to betray his thoughts. “I was beginning to worry you’d turned into a pillow, you were so well hidden in your sheets.”

“Don’t be silly, Matsu,” Misa replied without any bite, but she did start to shift a bit, making her way into a pseudo upright position. Matsuda didn’t mind being thought of as silly if the impact was getting Misa up and moving again. “I guess I shouldn’t ask him to dye his hair with me now, huh.”

“What?”

“There’s a trend going around where when girls dye their hair, their- their boyfriends get a little streak of the same colour.” Fresh tears sprang into the corners of her eyes as she spoke. “I was going to ask Light if he wanted to, but now…”

Matsuda hadn’t heard of such a trend, but it did sound cute. Only, he highly doubted Light would do such a thing, boyfriend or otherwise. The most out of the box, vaguely alternative thing he’d ever seen Light don was a slouchy beanie in the winter. Light had once expressed that buying jeans with rips in them looked bad, and that was fairly common in the fashion world. Light, always in a blazer and pressed pants, or a name brand turtlneck with crisp slacks, would’ve certainly declined putting a streak of peachy-pink hair dye in his hair.

Matsuda would do it, if Misa asked him. It might be a boyfriend girlfriend trend, but if Misa asked him…

Her eye caught the takeaway bag, and despite saying she wasn’t hungry, she still asked, “Did you get the chicken?”

Matsuda closed off that train of thought, and grinned. “Of course I did. Come on, I’ll set it out while you clean up a bit, yeah?” Matsuda grabbed the food and started laying it out for them in the main room on Misa's floor, considering if she’d be open to watching a movie as a distraction, as she went into the bathroom, closing her bedroom door behind him.

“What happened to… the girl?” The voice of the shinigami made Matsuda jump, almost dropping and spilling the food he held.

“O- oh! Rem!” Matsuda turned to see the shinigami hovering near Misa’s bedroom door.

“She cannot see or hear me, and so I cannot ask her why she is distraught.” Rem said.

Matsuda was confused as to why the shinigami wanted to know, but figured it was probably simple curiosity. “Oh, her and Light broke up- er, that is, Light rejected her. She’s upset, which is fair since Light is kind of a catch to most girls, but I’m sure she’ll be able to move on soon!”

Rem stared at Matsuda long enough to make him start to sweat nervously. And Matsuda had a lightbulb moment. “Oh! Yeah, I guess shinigami don’t date, then? So, dating is, um… When two people like each other, then they date. But if one person likes the other, but that person doesn’t like them back, then they-”

“I know how human courting rituals work,” Rem cut him off, and Matsuda’s lightbulb moment shattered.

Misa came out from her room then, her oversized black graphic tee shirt damp from where she had apparently splashed water over her face to clean it up. She had no makeup on, and Matsuda thought she looked nice without it. “Who were you talking to?” Misa questioned, following Matsuda’s gaze to see nothing. “Oh! Is the shinigami here?!” She looked about in a way that made it obvious she couldn’t see Rem, looking too far to the right and too low. Rem did not move a centimetre, staring down at Misa.

“Yes, sorry, it just appeared,” Matsuda explained.

“Hello shinigami!” Misa said, clearly putting effort into keeping her tone chirper. “I can’t see or hear you, but you can see and hear me, right?” She raised a hand to her hair, now piled into a ponytail, self-consciously. “Sorry, I’m usually more put together. I’m an idol, you know. Not many people- or shinigami- see me in such an unkempt state. You can hang around while Matsuda and I eat, I won’t mind.” It was silent for a moment, then Misa turned to Matsuda. “Did it reply?”

Matsuda, in turn, gave the shinigami an expectant look. Please don’t make me tell her you said nothing…

“It makes no difference to me,” Rem said. Matsuda relayed the short sentence in relief, and Misa came over to sit and eat, leaving the shinigami to hover all scary-like in the corner. Matsuda could’ve done without it there, in all honesty, but he wouldn’t contradict Misa this time around, all things considered.

Chapter Text

Day 9 cont.

POV - Ryuzaki / L

Light was most certainly not Kira at the present moment. That was the only explanation for why he would discard an asset such as Misa (that is, an asset such as the second Kira, who only needs a face to kill).

Of course, L already knew that Light was currently void of any Kira-related memories or motives, based on the slight changes in his behavioural patterns compared to the time he was under surveillance in his own home, during the Yotsuba investigation, and the times there in between, but this was simply supplementary evidence. Nevertheless, all the back and forth of Light’s motives and depth of involvement, the memory alteration and transfer of power, was confounding. Trying to solve the ‘how’ of it all had already given him multiple headaches in the past, and would continue to in the future.

How long had Light been Kira? How many Kiras had there been, if it wasn’t all Light? How long would it be before Light regained his Kira alias? How could Light control when to lose and regain his memories? How could justice ever be served if he never regained them, if the 13 day rule is proved to be true…?

The last thick slice of a lovely raspberry and vanilla cake easily found its way into L’s hands as he rooted through the fridge without much thought.

Since the dramatics of the previous night, L hadn’t seen Misa or Light (at least, he hadn’t seen them apart from a few glances of them in their rooms on the security cameras). Matsuda had been flitting back and forth like a nervous mother hen, checking on Light and Misa, though more so Misa, as Light seemed to be mostly fine, apart from wanting to avoid any awkward social interactions for the day. Matsuda bought and brought Misa food, which in turn made L idly wonder if Light, too, hadn’t eaten yet that day. It seemed unlike him, but then, L had no history of relationships of his own to compare such aftermath behaviours too. Still, Light had been insistent that it wasn’t a relationship, so…

L wandered back to his computer set up and clicked on one of the cameras in Light’s room again. Light wasn’t there, and so he clicked through the others, taking bites of cake in between clicks. L quickly realised that Light was no longer in his room, only to hear his voice float over from behind.

“Spying on me again, Ryuzaki?” Light asked, arms crossed as he came to a stop a little ways away.

“Mh. You’ve been in your room all day.” L spoke with his mouth full, something he knew Light hated for him to do. “Not completely out of the ordinary for you, but considering yesterday's events…”

“So you were checking on me?” L neither confirmed nor denied such an accusation. “You could’ve knocked. I just didn’t want to run across Misa, at least for now, until she’s had time to… y’know.”

“She too hasn’t left her room yet today,” L said, flipping to the cameras on her floor. Misa and Matsuda sat, eating and talking, Misa apparently having decided that she’d laid in bed long enough. Rem was there too, hovering in the corner of the room. L narrowed his eyes and stared at the shinigami. What was it doing there? He turned to see if Light was wondering the same thing, only to find Light already looking at him. His expression was confusing, he seemed to almost be sizing up L, but not in a way that implied he was going to start an argument. He paused, fork poised over his cake, meeting Light’s gaze and tilting his head curiously. What was that look? Neither spoke for a moment, then he held out the cake towards Light. “Raspberry vanilla, if you like. It’s very good. Last slice.”

Light huffed a small laugh. “I should eat a proper dinner before having any sweets,” he said, but even so he still walked closer and accepted the fork from L. L was admittedly surprised, as his offers to share with the others most often went unaccepted. Light held the bottom of the plate, hand overlapping with L’s, as he took a bite, purposefully taking from the side with less frosting. “You’re right,” Light said, placing the fork back on the plate and letting go. “It’s good.” He stepped back again. “But I think I’m gonna go make some real food.”

Light walked away, and L was left there trying to puzzle out Light’s behaviour. But then, what was new?

-

POV - Light

It wasn’t really something he had considered before.

”Son, one last thing. I wanted to say… You know, I’d support you no matter what.”

“Is this… about the case?”

“No, no. I mean… Your mother and I wouldn't think differently of you. If you weren’t, er, into people like Misa. That is, laws are working on being passed right now, for common-law marriages to be legalised for same-sex couples, and-”

“Dad!”

“I’m just saying-”

“Dad, I’m not- I’m just not interested in Misa!”

“Alright son, but just so you know, if anything… changes…”

Although, truthfully, he hadn’t ever put much thought into any relationships before. The most he thought about was social standing and who made the most sense to situate himself closely to. He had friends, male and female. He knew quite a few of the girls wouldn’t hesitate to accept if he asked them out. He’d never considered any of the guys. Would they? Would he? He’d never even really thought it to be an option.

”What, are you gay or something?!”

“Misa-”

“No! It’s not fair! I just don’t understand, Light! I love you, why won’t you love me back?!”

“Love isn’t a feeling that you can force, and I’m sorry that I allowed this to carry on as long as it has, but I can’t give you what you want.”

Love wasn’t foreign to Light. He loved his father. He loved his mother, his sister. He loved his baby niece, even if she was only 2 years old and he’d only seen her a handful of times. He had a childhood friend that moved away, and was certain he had loved them. He wasn’t certain he loved any of his high school friends, but he did like them. But, that wasn’t the same sort of love that Misa had cried to Light about. That sort of love involved attraction, a desire for a different sort of relationship. A desire to spend a life together, a formation of a unit, a way to bond oneself to another. Had Light ever felt like that for anyone, whether it be woman or man?

He recalled one of his friends teasing another, calling him a late-bloomer because at age 17 he’d never had a girlfriend, or had even thought about it. Light had girlfriends, but practically only in name.

Light had dated a girl named Yuri for a short period in high school. She was sweet, and very upbeat. She was a ray of sunshine by all accounts, and they ended things when they agreed they were better off as friends. There was no visible future there, no indication of two people creating one pair.

He had also dated a girl from college named Kiyomi. He dated her because… She liked him, and she was generally regarded as a catch. She was intelligent, and a good conversationalist, but attraction? Connection? Light couldn’t quite say he felt particularly strongly for her in that way.

Misa had appeared around that time as well and well, Light knew how he felt about her.

Light liked Matsuda. He was a bit simple sometimes, but he was a good guy, and Light could see them being friends outside of the task force. That said, he most certainly didn’t feel anything nearing that sort of love for him.

Such thoughts had been occupying his mental space for the better part of the day. Having never given it much consideration before, now was apparently the time to catch up on what he’d put off.

However, lingering on such things reaped little reward. Whether or not Light was homosexual or heterosexual, if he had experienced love or not, in the end didn’t really matter. Love was meant to develop naturally, was it not? And so, there was no use ruminating on it.

Instead, Light decided to go get something to eat for dinner, and in the meantime look about for Ryuzaki as a source of distraction and company.

Ah.

Light hadn’t thought of Ryuzaki.

Ryuzaki pissed him off. He was stubborn, blunt, and unmannered. He ate almost exclusively sugar and caffeine. They’d quite literally fought on more than one occasion. He was paranoid and convinced Light was a serial mass murderer. He was strange and aggravating beyond rational thought.

Ryuzaki was also by far the most interesting person Light had ever met. He’d never had a conversation with him that wasn’t engaging, even over the most mundane of things. He thoroughly enjoyed working side-by-side with Ryuzaki during the Yotsuba case, despite the arguments. Ryuzaki had said that Light was his first true friend, and it had made Light feel… Special, somehow. He sought out Ryuzaki’s company, even after they were no longer forced into proximity, despite having every reason to want to avoid him. He’d been genuinely concerned when Ryuzaki hadn’t been sleeping, and then slept in bed beside him. Such a thing would be regarded as scandalous by any outside viewer.

He’d picked up on Ryuzaki’s little habits, how he’d bite his thumb when thinking hard, or distracted, and how he’d prefer to fall asleep only after any others around had. Ryuzaki liked berries, but disliked citrus. He preferred tea over coffee, but would drink the latter if lacking sleep, which was usually. He recalled the couple of times he’d allowed his thoughts to wander in regards to Ryuzaki, and all the things he didn’t know about him. That, too, would likely be scandalous, should anyone have known.

Could he possibly… have feelings for Ryuzaki? Of all people? Of course, the more he pondered it, the more probable it seemed. When Light thought of Ryuzaki, it wasn’t like how he thought of others. He couldn’t define the difference beyond simply… being more invested. He was consistently intrigued by Ryuzaki, and when he wasn’t being an asshole, Light enjoyed his company more than he had anyone else before. Was that what ‘love’ was meant to feel like? Light couldn’t very well ask anyone.

What about the romantic implications of love? He thought of his dad, calling his mom pet names, his friend holding hands with his girlfriend and resting her head on his lap in the courtyard. His mom would write little love notes and slip them into his father’s coat pockets to find later, even after being together for twenty years. He thought of romance movies, which he knew were dramatised for the theatrics of it all, yet still based in reality. He couldn’t really imagine himself or Ryuzaki behaving in such ways, could he?

But then, Light didn’t forget that day in the rain, and after. Did that count? It was odd, but Light was fairly certain Ryuzaki couldn’t do much without oddity, so, then, what intimacy was that? And was Light an outlier for not quite understanding or having a strong desire for such things?

Light continued down that train of thought as he walked through the headquarters, only to find Ryuzaki in front of the large screens, fork dangling listlessly from his lips as he eyed empty cameras. Light recognised the view of his own room, and he crossed his arms in mild annoyance.

“Spying on me again, Ryuzaki?” He questioned.

“Mh. You’ve been in your room all day.” Ryuzaki spoke with his mouth full, something Light knew that Ryuzaki knew he hated for him to do. Somehow it was more entertaining than irritating. “Not completely out of the ordinary for you, but considering yesterday's events…”

Light suppressed a twitch of a smirk. “So you were checking on me?” And uninvited thought crossed his mind- What if Ryuzaki felt the same way that Light did? That is, at the very least confused. “You could’ve knocked. I just didn’t want to run across Misa, at least for now, until she’s had time to… y’know.” Light finished his sentence admittedly lamely, distracted by his own thoughts.

Ryuzaki dropped his fork down to his plate and switched the cameras to Misa’s room. “She too hasn’t left her room yet today.” Ryuzaki stared up at the cameras, meanwhile Light stared at Ryuzaki.

Now that Light thought about it, and actually regarded his appearance beyond ‘weird hermit,’ Ryuzaki wasn’t bad looking. He might be unkempt, pale and tired, but not unattractive. His thick, dark hair that swept over his eyes was a striking feature, if nothing else, and for a split second Light wondered what it’d be like to run a hand through it. He had dark eyes, irises almost blending into his pupils, which made his habit of staring all the more intense. If he wasn’t always scrunched up and slouched, Light was certain they’d be of equal height. Was sexuality a necessary component in this type of attraction? Light didn’t feel one way or another in regards to the concept in and of itself, but then, he’d never had much of a libido, generally speaking.

Then Light realised that Ryuzaki had met his stare, and before Light could think of something to say, Ryuzaki held out his plate of cake towards Light. “Raspberry vanilla, if you like. It’s very good. Last slice.”

Light huffed a small laugh. Of course Ryuzaki would offer. It had become something of a habit for Ryuzaki to do so, even if Light almost always declined. “I should eat a proper dinner before having any sweets,” Light said, but even so he still walked closer and accepted the fork from Ryuzaki’s hand. Light saw a slight note of surprise on Ryuzaki’s expression at Light’s acceptance, and Light suppressed another smile as he steadied the plate in Ryuzaki’s hand with his own as well. Light decided to quite pointedly ignore the small flash of pride he felt at having thrown off Ryuzaki, also ignoring the way their hands were linked, and took a bite of the part with less frosting (too much frosting ruined perfectly good cake, a sentiment he and Ryuzaki had hotly debated in the past).

The cake was sweet, but not overbearingly so, the tartness of the berries creating a layered experience. “You’re right,” Light said, placing the fork back on the plate and letting go. “It’s good.” He stepped back again, distancing himself from the person that was now occupying his thoughts in a series of questions. “But I think I’m gonna go make some real food.”

The conversation ended there, and Light wondered if he ought to push his current line of thought, or let it lie. It’d be smart to leave it, but then, Light had always been something of an over-thinker.

Chapter Text

Day 11

POV - Misa

Life was cruel, and despite Misa always greeting it with open arms and a smile, she seemed to always be kicked down. At least, that’s how she felt. It seemed that ever since her parents’ deaths, her life was a never-ending spiral. She had learned to be self-reliant, but being able to be didn’t mean she wanted to be.

She’d tried to forge close relationships with her fans, create a cute bond between idol and audience, but when she was attacked in the alley that day by the man with the knife… And when she was almost kidnapped that time by that psycho girl… Misa quickly learned that life as an idol required a level of security and separation from her fans. They weren’t her friends, at least, not in the way she’d hoped they could be.

Her manager had become almost like an auntie to her, though a strict one. Now, she hadn’t seen her manager in ages, and it seemed that she had dropped Misa in exchange for Fuyuko and Tsukiko, a sister idol duo that went by the joint nickname Ko-Ko. Misa had cried about it to Matsu, which was potentially a conflict of interest, considering he was her new manager, but not really, since he was mostly pretending and Misa had to help him figure out how to do his job.

She thought she’d found what she craved with her idol friends, a popular and chaotic group that Misa always had fun with, but just like her manager, when she was taken in by Ryuzaki and stopped going out and making public appearances, they dwindled and gradually stopped answering her calls and texts, phasing her out of their lives. She hadn’t cried to Matsu about that. It was too embarrassing to have lost all of her friends like that.

At the core of it, Misa was lonely. She, in theory, did everything right. She remembered people’s birthdays and their favourite foods. She showed genuine interest in their hobbies and listened when they talked. But nothing seemed to work, no one seemed to stick around for long. No one cared.

And then she lost Light, too. Although, it seemed like she had never had him anyway.

She’d have done anything for Light. She’d already done anything for Light. She helped catch Kira, all because Light wanted Kira caught! She let that creepy Higuchi get all close to her to get information. She’d let herself be stuck in this building for ages, without much real defiance, because Light was stuck there too and he said it’d be helpful to the case. She was this close to ruining her career at this point, and she wasn’t even sure he knew that. She loved him. She knew that he was her fate from the first time she saw him. She’d do anything he asked. She’d die for him. She’d kill for him. And somehow, she still wasn’t enough.

Her mom, when she was alive, had always told her to greet each day with a new smile, and the day would smile back. Misa tried her best, but she was pretty sure by this point in her life that her mom might’ve been lying.

It seemed that Matsu still had some smiles to give, though. He beamed at her when she came down from her floor and into the sitting room on the main floor.

“Misa!” he said, seeming unphased by her unusual lack of high-energy chippiness. She hadn’t even bothered to do her hair again today, just brushing it out and letting it lay natural. What was the point, after all? Stuck in this skyscraper, there wasn’t anyone to impress anymore, and she had no energy to do it for herself.

Misa sat down next to Matsu and reached across the table and took a piece of chocolate from a small stack Ryuzaki had been eating. He gave her a curious look, to which she replied, “What?” In an admittedly harsh tone. In a less bitter voice, she continued, “You don’t need all those. Consider this payback for taking my cake before.” Ryuzaki looked like he wanted to say something, but smartly didn’t, instead just shrugging and taking another chocolate for himself.

“So, uh, your interview is tomorrow,” Matsu broached the topic delicately.

“Oh, right…” Misa had admittedly forgotten, but even more so just didn’t really feel up to it. Still, she had made a commitment, and really did want to get back to work…

“I wasn’t sure if you still wanted to dye your hair beforehand, but I bought some dye in case you wanted to. My sister helped me pick it out, she says it's a very good brand. If not, she has a friend who dyes their hair a lot and they can take it.”

Misa’s heart clenched thinking about how she had planned to dye a little piece of Light’s bangs along with her hair, the cute trend cementing them as an item, and how that would now never come to fruition.

Tears sprang in the corners of her eyes and she blinked furiously in an attempt to keep them from falling. She had only emerged from her room because she thought she had cried all her tears in the past two days, and her eyes still hurt from it.

“I’ll do that after the interview. It’ll be a good PR stunt to imply that there’s a change coming, to stir up buzz before the reveal, right?” She fiddled with the ends of her hair.

Why was love so painful? Shouldn’t it be beautiful?

-

POV - Ryuzaki / L

After three nights, or two and a half days, Misa emerged from her room. L had presumed she would soon. She’d snapped at L, emotions clearly still running high, but had still managed to talk work with Matsuda even as she was near tears. She still wanted to do her interview, and was running down how she’d answer various questions with Matsuda. A couple times, L interrupted to give a more appropriate answer to questions such as “what have you been doing during your time out of the public eye,” but for the most part left the two alone, instead focused on his laptop and an email he’d received from Watari in regards to the Wammy House.

Apparently, someone had managed to cause an explosion in the east wing, and while they had the skill level to cover their tracks as to who did it, pretty much all the younger residents were ‘on the case,’ as it were. It reminded L of an instance in which, when he was a young boy, someone had taken one of his belongings, likely in an attempt at bullying, and tried to hide his trail, to which L promptly located him and handled the situation. L had admittedly been something of a ruffian as a child, still intelligent, but more inclined to lash out violently. It was something that he’d worked on, under the guidance of Watari, as he got older. In fact, his fight with Light was the first time he’d gotten into a proper physical altercation in an extended period. But then, Light had started it, and L had never given an indication that he was above physical fights.

Watari liked to send L little updates like these every so often. He wasn’t entirely sure how he was meant to respond to such things, but he supposed it was somewhat nice. At least, it kept him in the loop in regards to the affairs of those being educated and trained to take his place when he died. The boy, what did he go by again… Near. The explosion the others were intrigued by was likely of little interest to him, if he were as similar to L as L thought him to be. If not, then L would’ve expected him to have already figured it out, lest he not be the successor L thought him to have the potential to be. Granted, he was still quite young… L had begun solving cases when he was young, too, but it had been of his own volition. How would that drive be impacted when it was thrust upon one, instead of innately fostered? L shut his laptop and stretched. That was an answer that would only be revealed as the time drew closer.

Chapter Text

Day 12

POV - Mogi

Mogi stepped onto the elevator to go up to the main floor where most of the task force tended to convene, but as the doors began to close, he saw Watari, decked out in his big coat and glasses he tended to wear when out in public, headed that way. Mogi hit the button to open the door back for him, and Watari nodded in acknowledgement. As the door closed behind him, Mogi held out a hand wordlessly, and Watari thanked him as he gave a couple of the bags he’d been carrying to Mogi’s waiting hands. Now unloaded, Watari switched his shades for his spectacles, and took off his coat and folded it over his arm, once more the perfect picture of an old-timey English butler.

It was a long elevator ride, so Mogi spoke. “Did you hear that they’re going to hold a festival for Kinrō Kansha no Hi here this year?”

“Yes, to pay respects to those fallen on the job throughout the duration of the Kira case, and to thank the current active officers. It’s said it’s going to be quite the occasion.”

They were both silent for a stretch, before Watari spoke again. “Will you take your family to the festivities?”

“Yes, that is, as long as Ryuzaki doesn’t decide we need to stay here for anything,” Mogi replied. “I know it’s short notice to ask for time off, but my wife loves parties and such things. We don’t get to go as often as she’d like… So it’d be nice to be able to, especially since I’ve been working so much this year.”

“Of course.”

…

ding.

The elevator door slid open, and Mogi was relieved to see Light on the other side. He was a much better conversationalist than Mogi. Only, Light was busy engaging in an argument with Ryuzaki. He was standing, leaning his arms on the back of a chair while Ryuzaki was in his usual spot, scrunched up in front of screens, only now turned to face Light. Neither acknowledged the two’s arrival.

“-the implication of which would recontextualise the foundation of what we know about genetics, and after all, it’d be nearly impossible to run conclusive tests without the factors of generational conditioning and the psychological impact of such an endeavour.”

“Psychological impact?” Ryuzaki questioned, thumb leaving his mouth so he could speak clearer. “What exactly would you suggest such tests would consist of that would be so harrowing? And wouldn’t we want them pushed to their limits, to truly see what they’re capable of?”

“Oh please, don’t act as if I’m the one to suggest untoward methods, between the two of us.” Light huffed, leaning further onto his arms. “I’m referring to studies that have already been done in the field in the past. If you really wanted to test something new, you’d want to look into genome sequences and compare those in individuals who-”

“And I suppose you don’t think there aren’t scientists who have already done that, do you?” Ryuzaki deadpanned. “I’m disappointed. Haven’t you heard of the 2003 Yun Shi study on-”

“Now, don’t be rude,” Watari cut in, hanging his coat on the back of an unoccupied chair. “Moji has the bags, Ryuzaki. Why don’t you tell him where he can set them instead of fighting?”

Ryuzaki glanced over, disinterested. “We aren’t fighting. We’re having a conversation. And I have nothing to do with those bags.”

“Ah, then I suppose Matsui didn’t go through you to contact me and ask to pick some things up for Misa’s interview today?” Watari asked in a condescending tone.

Ryuzaki, having been quite corrected, jutted a finger in the vague direction of Soichiro’s office and told Mogi that Matsuda was in there, and to take the bags to him. Mogi didn’t need to be told twice. Between Soichiro and Matsuda, and two geniuses who ‘weren’t fighting’ with a posh assistant, he knew which room he’d feel more at ease in.

“Oh, hey Mogi,” Matsuda beamed.

“Moji,” Soichiro corrected, but nodded in way of greeting as well.

Mogi held up the bags. “Watari brought you some things you asked for,” he said.

“Oh!” Matsuda grabbed them quickly. “Good, I was worried this wouldn’t get here in time. Misa requested some stuff for her interview today, I’ll go give this to her, thanks!”

Matsuda left, and Mogi addressed Soichiro. “How is Misa?”

“She’s doing quite a bit better, I think,” Soichiro replied, leaning back in his office chair. “At least, according to Matsuda. I’ve only seen her in passing, myself. Seems like she won’t be having another outburst over the whole thing, if that’s what you’re wondering about.”

Mogi nodded. “What about the investigation? Any updates on the, er, Death Note?”

“Unfortunately I haven’t heard anything. It’s been 12 days since the notebook was sent off, however, so I imagine we’ll know very soon.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Mogi said. When Soichiro looked at him curiously, he continued. “Matsui made a good point the other day. Just because the Death Note was sent off to be used in secret doesn’t mean it was used that same day. 13 days is the shortest amount of time we’d have to wait, but is by no means the longest. Apparently Ryuzaki said something that suggested not even he knows how long it’ll truly take.”

Soichiro’s expression fell ever so slightly as Mogi spoke, but his reply was even. “Of course. That makes sense, an assurance that the test can’t be impacted by anyone here who might have known about it…” He sighed. “Damn it, Ryuzaki. I can’t say that I wasn’t fully prepared to take Light home in the next couple of days.”

Mogi put a reassuring hand on Soichiro’s shoulder. “You’re an incredibly strong man, Asahi. I couldn’t imagine what I would do, were I in your shoes. Hopefully in the next week or so, the accusations put on your son will finally be cleared.”

“... Thank you, Moji.” Soichiro was clearly not saying something he was thinking, undoubtedly along the lines of the sentiment Mogi had head from him before, about this case, how it would never truly end, with the way it’s impacted his family, how Light would never be able to go back to being the normal kid he once was… But Mogi didn’t push the topic, and instead decided to discuss more light-hearted things, like the upcoming festival and Ide Hideki’s engagement.

-

POV - Ryuzaki/L

“-it’d be nearly impossible to run conclusive tests without the factors of generational conditioning and the psychological impact of such an endeavour.”

L’s gaze bore into Light’s returned stare. “Psychological impact?” He repeated back to Light, and dropped his thumb from where it had been hooked on his lip so he could be heard more clearly. Light’s gaze ticked down to follow the movement, only to lock back onto his stare again as L continued. “What exactly would you suggest such tests would consist of that would be so harrowing? And wouldn’t we want them pushed to their limits, to truly see what they’re capable of?”

Light leaned in further across the back of the chair he stood behind. “Oh please, don’t act as if I’m the one to suggest untoward methods, between the two of us,” he said, a reproving tone paired with a mischievous glimmer in his eye. “I’m referring to studies that have already been done in the field in the past. If you really wanted to test something new, you’d want to look into genome sequences and compare those in individuals who-”

“And I suppose you don’t think there aren’t scientists who have already done that, do you?” L countered quickly, not bothering to let Light finish the sentence, leaning closer and resting his hands on his knees. “I’m disappointed. Haven’t you heard of the 2003 Yun Shi study on-”

“Now, don’t be rude,” Watari interrupted L even as Light was opening his mouth to do the same. He set his coat on a chair and with a meaningful look said, “Moji has the bags, Ryuzaki. Why don’t you tell him where he can set them instead of fighting?”

L had vaguely registered Watari and Mogi’s entrance, and was annoyed that he and Light’s discussion was interrupted as he was forced to acknowledge their presence. Watari knew they weren’t arguing, but judging by his look, Mogi didn’t, which L hardly thought was his problem, but he clarified anyway. “We aren’t fighting. We’re having a conversation. And I have nothing to do with those bags.”

“Ah, then I suppose Matsui didn’t go through you to contact me and ask to pick some things up for Misa’s interview today?” Watari asked in a condescending tone.

Annoyed, L jutted a finger in the vague direction of Soichiro’s office. “Matsui’s in there, you can give the bags to him.”

Mogi left the room quickly, and Watari didn’t give L the chance to continue his previous conversation with Light, as he said, “Moji brought up the upcoming Kinrō Kansha no Hi festival. It’s next week. I’d suggest giving the task force the day off to celebrate, as long as the case stays in its current state, that is.”

“Ah yes, my sister brought that up, last time we spoke,” Light added. “She was hoping dad and I could attend. I told her it was unlikely I’d be able to go, but it’d be nice if dad could.” He gave a not so subtle look at L.

“Oh, well, if Light insists,” L said, giving a tiny smirk when Light reacted, annoyance and amusement crossing his face before he turned his gaze away. Annoyance, Amusement, and something… Unusually soft. L’s expression dropped slightly when he noticed, once more drifting from casual conversation with Light to calculated suspicion. It wasn’t the first time L had seen such a hint of out of character softness in Light’s expression. It was reminiscent of the way Light’s demeanour had altered as, L suspected, the memories of being Kira left him, but to a lesser scale. L pondered whether he could bring it up, or continue holding that particular card, but Light started a new conversation with Watari, and so L allowed the moment to pass.

Chapter Text

Day 12

POV - Misa

Misa admired herself in the mirror for a moment, jangling the bracelets decorating her wrists and twirling her new puffy black skirt. The purple top, meant to be oversized with an off the shoulder, unfinished hemming style, was actually slightly too oversized, but Misa knotted the bottom, tucked it into her skirt, and layered over a waist cinch to accessorise.

“What d’you think, Matsu?” She asked, turning from the mirror to lazily model for him. “I don’t know about the cinch…”

Matsuda wasn’t sneaky about looking at his watch before he answered. “I’m, uh, not sure I’m qualified to give advice. I’m sure whatever you want to wear will look good, but we really should-”

“Don’t you worry,” she chastised him, unlacing the cinch for the second time and fluffing back out the shirt in the mirror. “I’m never late for stuff. Besides, you were so nice to make sure I got something new to wear so I don’t have to re-wear an old outfit, I wanna make sure I look really good, not just good!” She winked at Matsu and turned to touch up her eyeliner.

What she didn’t say aloud was that she wanted to look really good because for almost a week now she’d felt really bad, and refused to walk into a public appearance without her game face on, especially when the interviewer was known for their exposé-style interviews. Ryuzaki had already assured her that no new Kira-case-related information could be brought up, their security was too good for a run of the mill reporter, and if she was asked about her involvement in the case again, to stick to her usual story- she was questioned, no conclusive evidence was found, and had been lying low since. She was an actress, damnit, so if nothing else, even if she wasn’t happy and confident and living her best life, she could certainly act like it.

Misa grabbed a couple silver belt-like chains and tried them on instead, then traded out her choker for a long silver necklace to match. She posed for Matsu again and asked, “How about now?”

Matsuda hesitated before replying, “Really good?”

“Really good cute or really good hot?” Misa pressed, examining the length of her skirt in the mirror, twisting around to make sure it was long enough to cover her behind. Not that she usually minded dressing any which way, but again, she had to keep her audience in mind.

“Oh, um, really good… Pretty?” Matsuda offered, and the comment made Misa spin back around with a pleasantly surprised smile and bright eyes.

“Aww, really? You’re so sweet! Y’know people don’t call me pretty very often.” She clasped her hands by her cheek. “I think I like that even more that ‘cute’ or ‘hot.’” She glanced up at the clock on her wall. “Oh, right, heh, okay, let’s go!” She clapped her hands and flounced towards the door. “Let’s get the heck outta this boring building!”

Her good mood was promptly dashed when, on her and Matsu’s way to the door, she had the misfortune to come across Light and Ryuzaki sitting on the floor of the living space playing go.

Her gut reaction was to either start crying or go ask Light to take her back, but she wasn’t going to risk ruining her makeup or (further ruining) her pride. So instead, she tossed her head, holding her nose high with a “Hmph!” before saying “See you later, Ryuzaki.” She didn’t acknowledge Light.

“Yes, see you later. Matsui, did you do as I asked?” Ryuzaki asked without looking up from the go board, watching carefully as Light flipped over 3 of his pieces.

Matsuda nodded quickly. “Yes! I was going to ask Watari to turn on the tracker in the car on the way.”

Misa tossed her hair and fiddled with the tracking bracelet mixed in with her regular ones. It was too small to slip her hand through, and had to be removed with a key. Not quite as bad as handcuffs, but still… “Keeping track of where I am and listening to everything I do… You know you really are a stalker-creep, Ryuzaki. You’re lucky I even still wanna be your friend after all this,” she crossed her arms and stuck out her tongue.

“It’s your own fault,” Ryuzaki replied, rolling a go piece between his fingers, scanning the board slowly. “If you hadn’t run away from Moji previously, then perhaps I’d be able to trust Matsui to keep track of you without the added security.”

Light’s eyes didn’t leave the go board either, whether to acknowledge her or Matsuda. Annoyed, Misa quickly led the rest of the way across the room, Matsuda tailing close behind. When they were alone in the elevator, Misa’s haughty body language melted, leaning against Matsuda’s arm. “Matsuiiiii, I can’t believe him, ohh!” She stamped her foot. “Did you see that? Light totally ignored me!”

“You ignored him too,” Matsuda countered, and the withering glare Misa sent him had him rushing to add onto the thought. “He probably just felt awkward! You know how it is with exes.” He awkwardly patted her shoulder. “It’ll be okay, I mean, you know the saying, there are as many people as there are stars.”

“But he’s, like, my soul-star,” Misa lamented. “You don’t get it. Love at first sight! The innate knowledge that two people belong together~~”

“You know, most people fall in love more than once in their life. I’m sure you’ll have plenty of other boyfriends who love you back just as much as you love them, or even more. You’re pretty, and talented, and…” Matsuda clammed up, and Misa was about to question him, but the elevator dinged open, and Matsuda quickly stepped out to greet Watari at the car.

-

POV - Watari

Watari felt even more like a butler in the past week than he normally did for L. Picking up deliveries, communicating employee requests, chauffeuring around a suspect and her keeper. Alright, so perhaps it was all within his usual range of activities. But doing such things for an entire task force of individuals was somehow less appealing than simply attending to L. Still, it had become something of a new normal, and at least some of the others had proper manners.

When Watari returned with Matsuda and Misa that night, he parted ways with them to go gather L’s things for laundering, asking Matsuda and Misa to bring their things to the laundry room as well if they’d like. Soichiro and Mogi rarely had anything to include in the wash, preferring to have it done at home, and had likely left already anyway, so he didn’t seek them out.

Watari knocked at L’s bedroom door, but no response came. He knocked once more before unlocking the door (L always kept it locked, whether or not he was in there), finding the room empty. It was still early for L to go to bed, but he was usually winding down by now. Watari absently wondered what he might be up to as he grabbed L’s laundry basket, suspecting that the baklava in the kitchen was likely quickly dwindling in that very moment. He picked up the few items left strewn about the floor, then left, locking the door again behind himself.

Watari knocked at Light’s door next, but again received no reply despite hearing movement on the other side. He waited for a moment, and was about to knock one more time when the door opened, Light greeting him with a clearly tired expression.

“Pardon me. I didn’t mean to intrude, I didn’t expect you to be asleep this early,” Watari offered with a small nod of his head and hand at his chest.

“That’s alright, I wasn’t quite yet.” Light replied in a hushed tone, and, noting the basket at Watari’s side, continued, “Laundry day already, huh? That’s fortunate. One moment, please.”

Watari gestured in a ‘go on’ sort of way, and Light closed the door again. As Watari waited, he could faintly hear rustling, then, to his surprise, a soft voice that was notably not Light’s.

While Watari couldn’t make out exactly what the other person was saying, he could make out Light’s whispered replies to them. “I’m just getting the laundry together.” … “Yeah, right.” … “Don’t be ridiculous, give it here and wear this.” … “It’s the same thing, all cotton, you’re just being dramatic.”

Watari might not have been able to make out the other person’s words, but he was able to tell who it was. Perhaps the baklava would last a full 24 hours after all.

Light opened the door again and handed out a laundry bag. “Thank you very much, Watari.” He smiled at Watari in a way he recognised as polite but quite surface level. Light’s body language, in contrast, made it clear he was ready to close the door as soon as Watari responded.

“Of course, Asahi. You and Ryuzaki have a good night’s rest. I will leave both of your things on the racks in the laundry room until you are ready to get them.” Watari didn’t outright laugh at Light’s utterly taken aback expression, but he did chuckle on his way down the hall after Light closed his door back.

Chapter Text

Day 12

POV - Light

“Watari knows you’re sleeping here tonight,” Light muttered, laying in bed facing the ceiling with a hand tucked under his head.

Ryuzaki didn’t seem to care about that bit of information at all. “Yes?” He said in a questioning tone. He rolled over to face Light, who could almost swear he could feel Ryuzaki’s huge, owlish eyes looking at his profile even through the dark of the room. “You know, I was expecting to get some sleep tonight, but if you’re going to be up and down and talking…”

“Aren’t you the one who used to always keep me up?” Light deflected, but quietened down anyway, shuffling the fluffy throw blanket off of himself and onto Ryuzaki. Ryuzaki buried himself up to his nose under the now triple layer of blankets coating him, and closed his eyes again.

Earlier that afternoon, after Light had eaten his dinner and said goodbye to his dad for the day, but still early enough that he wasn’t quite ready to turn in yet, Ryuzaki had approached him.

Ryuzaki wandered into the rec room where Light was stretched out on the couch reading, and without any preamble said, “If it’s quite alright with you, I think it’d be for the best if we shared sleeping arrangements for the night.”

“Huh?” Light was quickly distracted from his reading. It took him just a beat before he realised, and was promptly irate. Tamping down his temper, he looked back down at his book and continued reading as he said, “Ah, I see. To make sure I don’t manage to kill a convict whose name and face I don’t know, with a murder book I don’t have.”

“Something like that.” Ryuzaki ambled onto the couch without grace, Light having to tuck in his feet to make room for him, and grabbed the tv remote. “If you aren’t Kira, then please consider it an indulgence. I’m certain I’ll rest easier tonight with you close enough to observe,” he added as he channel surfed, settling on some drama not unlike the kind Light’s sister tended to watch, tucking his chin onto his drawn up knees.

“It seems I indulge your illiberal whims frequently,” Light complained, but the lack of further argument made it clear that he wasn’t going to fight the subject.

And that was that on that.

As Light lay there next to Ryuzaki, he couldn’t help feeling annoyed again. While he could acknowledge that it wasn't great that his permanent state of being over the past few months was either annoyed or stressed, it didn’t really prevent the feeling from continuing. He was annoyed at Ryuzaki because despite how long it had been, and having helped Ryuzaki catch Higuchi and get their hands on the death note, Ryuzaki still thought he was Kira. He was annoyed at himself because despite Ryuzaki accusing him of being a mass murderer and doing some things that Light was fairly certain were against the law in order to try and prove it, he was realising that he had some form of feelings for him. He was annoyed because he couldn’t tell if Ryuzaki knew that Light’s feelings for him were… undetermined, and was thereby utilising that knowledge to manipulate Light, or if Ryuzaki didn’t notice any difference, and Light simply interpreted it that way due to his own changing perception. The latter he could navigate, but if it were the former, Light would’ve rather have continued seeing Misa than grapple with any sort of feelings towards a smug, disinterested, scheming-

“Light, I thought we agreed you’d let me sleep. Your thinking is distracting me,” Ryuzaki interrupted Light’s thoughts, making him realise how tense he was despite laying down. Light turned to face Ryuzaki the same way he had him, tucking his arm under his pillow and trying to get comfortable. “Unless of course you’re considering confessing to being Kira, in which case I w-”

“No, Ryuzaki,” Light said with a small sigh. “Good night.”

“Mhm.”

-

Day 13

POV - Light

When Light woke the next morning, the first thing he registered was the crack of light shining directly in his eyes from where his curtains weren’t shut properly. The second thing he registered was the fact that precisely all of Ryuzaki’s limbs were either flung over or wrapped around him, as was the case for one arm which coiled around his arm tight enough that Light was slightly concerned about blood flow to the extremity. He squinted harshly, turning his head away from the window only to be promptly greeted by a faceful of messy black hair. It smelled faintly of mint, Ryuzaki’s shampoo.

Slightly annoying? Yes. Would not be happening if they were both fully awake? Yes. Great at blocking out the morning rays? Also yes.

Light stifled a yawn and let his eyes close again. Normally he was the sort who, once he was awake, could not fall back asleep and therefore wouldn’t really bother to try, but the combination of having slept poorly that night (Ryuzaki was fidgety and Light was a light sleeper) and not wanting to wake up Ryuzaki (in their current state there was no way in hell he’d be able to get up without doing so) presented an occasion for him to try anyway.

When he woke up again, released from Ryuzaki’s death grip, Light quietly and carefully got up and stretched his arms upwards, cracking his neck and rolling his shoulders out. Looking back at the bed, Light saw that Ryuzaki was hanging an arm off the edge of the bed, face down in the pillow in a way that made Light question how he was breathing comfortably. The blankets that he had cocooned himself in while falling asleep had managed to be kicked down towards the end of the bed, leaving Light with the extremely rare sight of Ryuzaki wearing something other than oversized plain white tee shirts and jeans or grey sweatpants.

Misa, the fashionista that she was, had once made fun of Ryuzaki by asking if he slept in the same baggy blue jeans and white shirt he chose to wear every day, and although she had meant it as a hyperbolic joke, Light and Ryuzaki were both able to confirm that more than a couple times Ryuzaki had in fact managed to fall asleep still wearing jeans rather than proper sleeping attire, much to her horror. She had tried on more than one occasion to attempt to dress Ryuzaki, insisting that she could make him look ’less homeless,’ as she put it, but she never had any luck having her demands met.

The night prior was no different, Ryuzaki climbing into Light’s bed in his usual ensemble of a white short sleeve and grey pyjama pants as Light put away a few of things he’d taken out and used throughout the day, up until Ryuzaki managed to lay directly on a broken pen that was leaking ink. Light had gotten short about it, especially when Ryuzaki began making Kira comments in response to a pen being found in his bed, but Light didn’t know how the pen had gotten there. He must’ve set it down and forgotten about it, but Light would still blame Ryuzaki for it breaking and staining both Ryuzaki’s shirt and his bedding anyway. Light had just finished changing out the bed sheet (thankfully only the top sheet was damaged) when a knock came at the door.

Watari, as though sensing that a mess had been made, appeared to collect Light’s laundry. Light got Ryuzaki’s stained shirt to add to his laundry bag, handing over one of his own shirts for Ryuzaki to borrow for the meantime. Ryuzaki had, of course, had something to say about that, about being picky when it came to fabrics, but Light shut that down quickly, pointing out that both shirts were just cotton. He didn’t want his only extra sheets to also get stained. (He had, of course, intended to be quiet during the exchange, but that hadn’t panned out, which led to an awkward interaction with Watari. But that was, he supposed, irrelevant.)

All of that to say, Misa was correct; a dark green did suit Ryuzaki more than his usual white. Ryuzaki was already so pale, the white did no favors, but the green complimented his dark hair and eyes. According to Misa's colour analysis.

Light hadn't selected the colour intentionally. The room had been dark enough that night that he hardly noticed what he’d grabbed. Now, with sunlight filtering in, Light could see Ryuzaki as he unburied his head from his pillow, face half obscured by his messy hair. He made a small, disgruntled noise and pulled his arm up off the edge of the bed to rub his eyes, not quite sitting up but not quite laying down, bearing his weight on his opposite arm. Light had seen Ryuzaki fall asleep and wake up plenty of times, but without the clanking of cold cuffs, he looked… domestic.

“You slept quite a bit last night. That is, quite a bit for your usual sleep habits,” Light said, needing to break the silence as Ryuzaki looked down at what he was wearing, expressionless face not able to keep Light from knowing that he was uncomfortable being out of his normal routine wear. Unlike Ryuzaki’s loose fitting clothing, Light’s shirt was his proper size, and apparently close to Ryuzaki’s as well. Unsurprising, considering their almost identical height and weight. But their proportions were slightly different, Ryuzaki filling out the neckline more due to his broader shoulders, yet other parts hanging looser due to him being slimmer.

Ryuzaki turned his eyes from the shirt to Light and replied, “Yes, well, I didn’t lie when I said I’d rest better if I slept with you.” He blinked blearily and finished sitting up, pushing hair from his eyes. He wasted no time pulling out his phone, and after a moment of clicking around (all the while holding it in his odd way that made Light shake his head internally) sighed and set it back down. “Good. As expected, they waited to use it.” Ryuzaki scrunched up his legs, blanket tugging along with them as he leaned on his knees. “Thirteen days. The minimum number of days possible before I have my answer. Any moment from here on out could hold the truth.” His finger hooked on his lip, biting at his nail as he often did when thinking. “I’ll be honest, Light. I expected you to somehow find a way to interrupt the experiment before this point, but it seems you’re continuing to prove to be a challenge to predict.”

“That’s probably because you’re trying to predict what I’ll do under the assumption that I’m Kira,” Light replied. “If you were able to accept that I’m not, I’m certain my inaction would make sense, especially considering, as you said, this will finally cement the fact that I am not and was never a mass murderer. And don’t reply that I’m attempting to act like that intentionally to throw you off, because at that point it turns into a circular conversation as it always does.” Light took a breath before he allowed himself to get annoyed. Again. This sort of talk should be expected from Ryuzaki at this point, even if it was quite literally the first thing after waking up. “It’s too early for this sort of talk. I’m going to eat breakfast.”

“Well if you insist.” Ryuzaki got out of bed and stretched loosely. “I wonder if Watari got the marmalade I requested yet.”

“Marmalade?” Light questioned as he ran his fingers through his hair to straighten it out before leaving the room. “I thought you didn’t like citrus.”

Ryuzaki cocked his head to the side and stared at Light for a beat. “Yes, that’s mostly true. It’s an orange vanilla marmalade. Have you ever had it before? It’s sweeter than, say, lemon curd. You’re welcome to have some.”

“I’ll consider it,” Light replied. “But first maybe something substantial.”

Ryuzaki rolled and shrugged his shoulders as they left the room to head to the kitchen, complaining that Light’s shirt was too fitted. Light, in turn, rolled his eyes and told him to not complain if he wasn’t going to do anything about it.

Chapter Text

Day 13

POV - Ryuzaki/L

Light was looking at his food, seemingly disinterested in much else in the moment. L stared at Light across the breakfast table, trying to discern what could be going through his mind. Misa stared at L, mouth hanging open in shock as she took in what he was wearing. Matsuda’s eyes were hardly even open, attention solely on the coffee pot, apparently having spent the night as he was occasionally apt to do.

“Ryu, you’re wearing green!” She squealed the last word, making everyone else in the vicinity’s ears hurt.

“I’ve told you not to call me that,” L replied through a mouthful of toast. It was slightly overdone, which made him wrinkle his nose before opting to just lick some of the marmalade off the top.

’Marmalade? I thought you didn’t like citrus.’ Light had said it as though it were a fact everyone knew, despite L being confident he’d never said anything of the sort to him.

‘Huh, you’re right,’ he’d said, having taken a bite of L’s breakfast before either of them had properly sat to eat. ‘Sugary. Too sweet for first thing in the morning,’ he teased.

“And I’ve told you to let me dress you nicely, but you ignore me,” Misa argued. “Where did you get that?” She leaned into his personal space and picked at the fabric lightly. “If you’d just let me do your hair-” She began bunching up part of his hair, forgoing permission altogether, and L caught her wrist in his hand, dropping it back by her side, then combing his own fingers through the section she’d messed with.

L sipped his tea and once more wrinkled his nose. Light, in turn, barely even glanced over before sliding over the milk from his end of the table, and calling over to Matsuda to please bring the sugar before coming and sitting down to eat.

“My interview yesterday went well, not that either of you asked,” Misa pouted, propping her elbows up on the table as she settled into a seat. “It seems like the conspiracies surrounding my mysterious disappearance from the public’s eye has resulted in some of my fans being super excited for any new content about me. Of course, I’m not surprised. It is exciting, reappearing after an absence like the one I’ve had. I also found out that the movie I finished wrapping a while ago has released the extended trailer, so a lot of the interview was about that project.” Matsuda came in with his and Misa’s food, and passed over the sugar bowl to L. “Aw, thanks Matsu. Like I was saying, good press or not, I’m glad all this is almost over.”

As Misa prattled on, L went back to his interrupted train of thought.

Light had something planned, he knew it. But whatever tactic he was currently employing was unlike anything previously devised by either of them. Granted, they had *both* gone down the ‘befriend the enemy’ line, which was arguably what Light was doing now, but this manifested incredibly differently. The performance was much more convincing even to L himself. Tennis and coffee at a cafe? That had been more of a battle than a convincing act. For this, though, Light had the audacity to note things about L’s personal tastes, whether that be in books and movies or in flavor profiles.

If Light had been the version of himself that L had first met, the version that asked to be put in solitary confinement, then he could easily say that it was purely another attempt for Light to gain his trust, but with this version of Light it was trickier, as he had never before given L reason to believe he was lying or conniving in the way L knew he had the potential to be. Light could be pretending to be the trustworthy version of himself, but even then L would’ve registered the difference, as he’d spent almost a year by this point picking apart Light’s every move and his tells, while not necessarily obvious, were still absent nevertheless.

It of course wasn’t helped by the fact that L hadn’t ever had the opportunity to analyse this particular set of emotions from Light previously. He’d seen him angry, proud, worried, confused, engrossed, stressed… He’d never seen him… What, genuinely friendly? Is that correct? Was Light even capable of that? To be fair, this was one area L himself also severely lacked in. He hadn't lied when he said he'd never truly had a Friend before. He wasn't even fully certain how he ought to act in such a dynamic.

He briefly considered whether or not to broach the topic before quickly deciding to hold it for future use. It’d be more useful for L’s further analysis of Light’s behavioural patterns if he continued to remain nonreactive, and it could also be for his benefit if needed to use it as a card to play later, whether it be in calling Light on his bluff or utilising it to trump Light in another way. Perhaps L could learn more about Light this way, an equivalent exchange of personal knowledge.

Besides, Light was more easily agreeable to L’s demands at the moment, and L had no qualms with facilitating that behaviour. Addressing it could have unpredicted impacts in their growing social dynamic.

And he didn’t too much mind Light noting what fabrics he preferred or flavours he liked in order to accommodate him, either, he thought as he pushed away his half eaten food in favor of adding milk and sugar to his tea.

“So Ryuzaki, I’m presuming you’re wanting to repeat the same arrangements as last night until the convict is dead, am I correct?” Light questioned as he finished his food and sipped his drink.

“Yes, that would be for the best. I expected you might realise that,” L agreed, taking another sip of his tea. Much better. “Of course, I can have Watari arrange more comfortable sleeping arrangements.”