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Friendship, Growth, and Feelings

Summary:

The one where they all have to clean up the mess that has happened since Texas, and the domino effect of everything after. Zay knows stuff, and Riley learns some truths. Farkle is a bit confused, but still supports his friends. Lucas eventually makes his own choice, and fights for what he wants. Maya digs her heels in as much as possible. /Lucaya ending/

Chapter 1

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

It hadn’t started in Texas, not really. But the door had been opened, and he and Maya had both had a small glimpse inside, to what could be. But it was too big, it was overwhelming to even think about, that this girl who he’d grown so fond of had allowed him to sneak under her walls enough that she could have those kinds of feelings for him of all people. He was so stunned by the idea of her feelings, and confused by his feelings for Riley, that he couldn’t sort through his feelings and what it all could mean until it was far too late, and Maya had taken the decision out of his hands entirely.

It didn’t occur to Lucas to notice exactly how protective he’d grown of Maya until they went on the ski trip that screwed everything up. He’d seen her fight to smother her love for art when the board had planned to shut them down, but inevitably she’d fought for herself… her future. He’d been proud of her. Not long that triumph, her pain takes a front seat when Mr. Matthews’ history class digs up the past in the form of forgiveness. She’d bared her abandonment to an entire classroom, and knowing she was hurting, hurt him too. He’d always thought Riley’s mom was right when she said Maya was fierce. Maya was one of the strongest people he’d ever known. Lucas had offered what little comfort he could in that moment, silently wishing, not for the first time, that the ease that Farkle had with the girls could be shared with him. But he knew nothing could compare to the years of childhood friendship that they had cultivated. And then, during their school trip to the mountains, when everything was held together by threads, he watched her nearly fall off a cliff to save Farkle. He’d never been so furious at her. But even then? He still didn’t get it.

Maya defended Riley’s actions toward ‘cabin boy’, which wasn’t unexpected, but made him annoyed nonetheless, even if he couldn’t explain why. Lucas knew Maya operated in shades of grey when it came to her friendships. He also couldn’t explain why he felt jealousy over Riley’s innocent conversation, and even though Maya’s giddy flirtation towards Josh Matthews was more annoying than it used to be… somehow it wasn't the same. Her excuses for Riley felt like just a Band-Aid to cover other problems. Lucas had noticed it more and more since the bomb Farkle dropped on New Year’s, the way Maya did her best to put Riley between them. He didn’t blame Maya. How could he? They were all one step from being pulled into quicksand now. And her loyalty always laid with Riley… even over herself.

If Lucas was honest with himself, Maya’s lack of regard for her own feelings made him equally sad and angry.

Somehow, between all the sarcasm and distractions Maya threw at him that weekend, he did finally get her to be serious for about five minutes. He finally asked a seemingly stupid question that had been itching at him for a few months. It wasn’t stupid though, and he thought he knew the answer, and it was clear from the look on her face that she suspected they were on the same page. But he had to ask. Because things between them didn’t just start in Texas. It had been steady as falling snow that finally triggered an avalanche that they were trying to fight their way through.

He’d known for some time that Riley liked his more polite and docile demeanor… the part of him that had dealt with serious consequences to thoughtless actions, and prevented him from letting loose. Lucas sometimes thought about that day in history class, when Billy had finally owned up to what he’d done and apologized. It wasn’t really a coincidence that he’d written Mr. Perfect on his head, or that he’d easily chosen Mayaville months later. Could he stay out of trouble? Absolutely. Was it mind-numbingly boring? Sometimes.

He never felt bored with Maya. Sometimes ‘not bored’ fell into terror inducing.

Lucas would call ‘Mr. Perfect’ a facade, but it’s the part of him that Riley likes. It’s the part Maya peels from him effortlessly, like a second skin. And he not only lets her, he encourages it.

Maya likes him for who he is… which is why she dumped the smoothie on his head, not just because it was a story he’d charmed Riley with.

“I never needed you to be a hero”, she finally said through clenched teeth. She knew he already knew. He understood her. She was a bit annoyed he made her say the words. “And I like when you don’t think you have to try to be perfect.”

And then somehow, she broke his brain and convinced him that he wanted Riley.

He wasn’t ready for Maya, not really. He wanted time. And she’d thrown him toward the ocean of commitment with a cinder block around his ankle. Forever with Riley or forever with her… there was no in-between. So, he did what she wanted even though the memory of her grin after the date they’d attempted at Topanga’s still made his chest hurt.

Maya would never even consider herself an option if she thought it would hurt Riley, even though the course the last few months had taken had pushed them closer than ever. She’d let him in, more than she’d probably planned.

00

It was the weekend after they came back from the cabin in the mountains when Zay knocked on the door to Maya’s apartment.

“I know you think you did the right thing here”, Zay said as she shut her bedroom door and he took up residence of her bean bag chair under the window.

“I did”, Maya insisted.

“It’s gonna blow up in your face”, he shook his head. “I know you did it to protect your girl, but is it going to be worth it in the end when they figure out what happened?”

“Let’s hope is not until senior year”, she gave a fake smile.

“Three years?!” Zay looked at her like she was crazy.

She shook her head. “Oh. No. Senior year of college”, she clarified with a tight smile. “With any luck, they’ll be married by then.”

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Yikes.”

“Oh, relax. Everything will be fine-“

“She says, before Mount Vesuvius erupts”, Zay finished.

She shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Zay huffed, very acquainted with her stubbornness. “Do you know what I thought when I first got to New York?”

“‘Wow, that’s a lot of goofballs in one friend group’?” she suggested.

“Besides that”, Zay rolled his eyes.

“You’re one of us now”, she teased, pointing a finger in his face.

“Yeah, okay. I’m a weirdo like the rest of you”, he rolled his eyes. “What I thought was-“ he pointed a finger back at her when she opened her mouth again and she scrunched her nose and plopped on the end of her bed, making a gesture for him to continue and then covered her mouth with her hand.

He stared at her suspiciously for a moment and continued.

“Honestly, when I lived in Texas? I thought Lucas was making you guys up. Or maybe he was exaggerating. I didn’t think there was any possible way that he would find himself with people like you.”

“Because New Yorkers are stereotypically rude?” Maya mumbled behind her hand.

“After barely two years, he was closer to you guys than any of our friends back home. And something about you in particular-“

Maya glared at him.

He snorted and waved her off. “Girl, I’m not scared of you. You chilled him out, Maya. You made Lucas one of your goofballs.”

Maya softened slightly and uncovered her mouth. “I’m glad you came here, Zay.”

“Me too. I’m glad I got to know all of you… and even more? I'm glad that I got to know this version of my best friend.”

“Is he really all that different?” she asked quietly.

“Let me just say that four years ago? He wouldn’t have let you tease him the way you do.”

She shakes her head. “I never would have been afraid of baby face Ranger Rick.”

“Probably not”, Zay agreed. “But he wouldn’t have let you close enough to be friends the way you are either.”

“If it actually bothered him, I wouldn’t do it!” Maya protested. “He’s the one pulling a flower out of his giant cowboy hat and putting it in my teeth, and playing the harmonic behind me while I’m mocking him-" she cut herself off when she noticed Zay staring at her with wide eyes. “What?!”

“Nothing. Just sometimes my best friend is a massive dummy. He likes when you’re happy. He grins himself absolutely stupid when you smile”, he said exasperatedly. “You two have really strange ways of being affectionate.”

“Do not”, she muttered.

“You call him Ranger Rick multiple times a day”, he said seriously. “Are you gonna try telling me it’s not affectionate? Isn’t your BS why he literally grabbed you by the face-”

She scowled. “Shut up.”

Zay just laughed.

00

“Something’s not right”, Lucas muttered for the third time as he through down his pen and got up to pace.

It had been several months since Riley had taken Maya on a field trip to ‘find herself’… whatever the heck that meant… and come home painted like Riley’s collage of purple cats. Shawn had proposed to Katy and they were planning a wedding. And then there had been the disaster at the ski lodge. Things have been easy with Riley, but the three of them were back at Topanga’s studying without the girls, and Lucas couldn’t help but feel unsettled about the last few months.

“What are you doing?” Zay asked watching Lucas warily.

Lucas shrugged. “Having a crisis?”

“I was afraid of that”, Zay muttered.

“Zay-“

“Man, we’ve been through this.”

“Something isn’t right-”

“With Maya”, Zay finished, letting out a loud sigh. He’d warned her this would happen.

“No, no. You don't want to poke the bear”, Farkle stared at Lucas incredulously. “Let the bear hibernate for the love-”

“Farkle… I know you want to protect Riley”, Lucas said earnestly. “I get it. That’s what Maya wants too… but who’s protecting Maya?”

“The Maya who would rip your arms off for even suggesting that?” Farkle asked.

“I know.” Lucas grimaced. Then he shook his head. “But everyone needs to be protected sometimes, Farkle. Do you remember when she drew you in a bird’s nest? You asked her if she thought you looked like a bird… What did she say?”

“That she thought I needed to be protected”, Farkle sighed.

“She’s been taking care of you and Riley for how long?” Lucas said a bit sympathetically.

Farkle grumbled a few things incoherently and finally came back to the conversation. “Do you and Maya actually have anything in common?”

Zay raised his hand for half a second. “They’re a lot more similar than you might think. Maya is ridiculously protective of the people she cares about. She may not always do the right thing, but she owns her mistakes… and usually the person that gets hurt the most by her actions is her. She would throw herself under a bus instead of hurting Riley.” He shrugged. “Lucas was always the protector in our group of friends… and then he met Maya. And even though she protected you and Riley, he started to want to protect her too. And then she let him.”

“You’re right about that”, Lucas agreed.

“Yeah, but-"

“Nobody is all one thing, Farkle”, Lucas shrugged.

“Yeah”, Zay offered with false humility, “Look at me! I’m both sexy and clever.” He received incredulous stares for his self-assessment. “All I’m sayin’, man, is I’ve been watching you and Maya doing the Cha Cha Slide while you’ve been doing the chicken dance with Riley.”

“Riley does like the Chicken Dance”, Farkle sighed.

Lucas stared at his oldest friend. “I don’t think-“

“Everybody clap your hands!” Zay said flatly.

Farkle was staring like Zay was crazy. Nothing new there.

“Alright. Ya’ll are no fun. Raise your hand if you’ve actually talked to Maya about her feelings”, Zay sighed and raised his hand again. “Right. Just me.”

“You talked to Maya-?”

“About feelings-“

“And you’re still alive?” Lucas finished incredulously. “Wait- what do you know?”

“Oh, I know lots of stuff.” Zay laughed in his face. “But I can’t help you. Do I look like I have a death wish?”

“Sometimes”, Lucas said pointedly.

“Okay, first of all, rude. Second… I can’t tell you what she said.”

“Come on, man! Help me out”, Lucas whined.

“I will say that you made it really easy for her.”

Lucas frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“I know Maya’s the terrifying option here, but you never did tell her if you had non-friendly feelings for her. Not even a little bit… and Maya’s no chump. She saw the writing on the wall. She figured the only way for Riley not to get hurt, was to let her make the decision. But Maya always thought it should have been the three of you. And for the record, I’m not an idiot. So don’t think I didn’t notice that the way you flipped out about her leaving the trail to save Farkle… and that it was equally as angry as she was at you for getting on Tombstone.”



“I said we weren’t just friends”, Lucas defended with a bit of a pout.

Zay just looked at him like he was an idiot.

Lucas groaned and banged his head on the table. “Damocles”, he grumbled.

“And don’t get me wrong. I love Riley. Anyone who doesn’t like Riley is a monster. You and Riley would probably have a really easy relationship, but the Lucas I knew would have appreciated a bit more of a challenge. I know you’ve changed, but I think that’s still part of who you are. And then there’s the other thing”, he said making a face.

“What other thing?” Farkle asked.

“Riley wants Prince Charming”, Zay said honestly.

“Yeah, well, look at him!” Farkle gestured to Lucas’s face.

“Riley has this certain idea of who people are supposed to be. When they don’t do that… she gets a little angry. It’s a lot to live up to sometimes.”

“But he literally called Riley a princess and put her on a white horse.”

Lucas groaned.

Zay snorted. “Do you want me to tell him?”

Lucas just sighed, looking like he wanted to take a nap. “It was Riley’s unicorn. Maya knows a guy.”

Farkle stared. “What? How? How did I not know about that?! Is my whole life a lie?”

“Maya came to me and asked me if I wanted to borrow her horse. I asked why, and she said ‘so that Riley can be a princess. Duh.’

Farkle’s eyebrows went up. “But she dumped two smoothies on your head!”

“That’s exactly what I wanted to do!” Zay threw his hands up. “Recycling conversations you had with her best friend is just tacky”, he scoffed.

“Yeah”, Lucas shrugged. “And she doesn’t look at me like I was the one who shot Bambi’s mom when I get mad!” he said exasperatedly.

“It seems that I may have made a miscalculation”, Farkle muttered, looking a bit confused.

“Look, man. They’re both special”, Zay said. “Riley makes you feel like you can always the best version of yourself. And Maya… she keeps you grounded, because she understands that making mistakes is inevitable. She doesn’t try to be perfect. What do you want?”

00

Lucas always looked to Maya. It had become a habit he didn't even know he had. She was usually the best gauge of what was going on. So when he looked for Maya and found her absent from their shared Biology class for the third day in a row, he knew he had to do something about it.

Instead of going to class the following day, he tracked Maya down, finding her in an abandoned corner of the school library.

“I don’t like when we fight.”

Maya slowly removed her nose from the chapter she was studying in Geometry. She looked up to find Lucas staring down at her more intensely than she was comfortable with. “Are we in a fight that I don’t know about?” she glanced back at her notes, pencil wiggling between her fingers.

“You never would have said anything if Riley hadn’t out-ted you”, Lucas said staring her down.

“Obviously not. I’d take it back if I could”, she shrugged, shooting him a warning look before going back to her text book. She was actually still low-key furious about Riley airing her feelings the way she did… and attempting to close the chapter of the Riley/Lucas will-they-won’t-they saga by telling a massive lie.

She appreciated even less, that now she got vaguely nauseous whenever Lucas was around. Riley swore they were butterflies, but Maya didn’t believe it. But if they were butterflies, Maya would murder them all eventually.

“Maya-“

She shook her head and looked back up, eyes looking over his shoulder. “Nope. We aren’t doing this.” Then Maya frowned. “You’re supposed to be in class.”

“You skipped Bio. Again.”

“Still trying to be like me, Lucas the Good?” Maya teased.

He sighed, mouth twisting in frustration. “Maya- aren’t you tired?” he asked quietly.

She met his gaze for a few long seconds. “All the time”, she muttered before going back to the worksheet she was filling out, silently dismissing him. Her willpower wasn’t strong enough for them to keep this up.

She wanted- It didn’t matter what she wanted.

Maya didn’t look up until she long after the sound of his shoes against the floor faded.

The next day, she slipped silently back into their class, deciding to pretend that the last few days hadn’t happened.

Notes:

I wrote +8,000 words of this on my phone over the last week and a half, while I’ve been re-watching the show, so it’s mostly done. There will be four chapters total. (I’m just doing some formatting, cleaning a bit up and adding a few stray thoughts.) This will be posted on both my AO3 & FFN accounts.

Chapter 2

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Later that evening, Farkle finds himself climbing up the fire escape to Maya’s apartment. He knocked on the closed window.

 

“Farkle!” Maya shouted through the glass as she crossed the room to open the window. “You nearly gave me a heart attack!”

 

“Can I come in?” he asked quietly.

 

“You didn’t want to use the door?”

 

He shrugged. “Can I-?”

 

Maya rolled her eyes. “Get in here. And try not to break your neck.” She sat on the edge of her bed and waited for Farkle to drop through her window and stand up to dust himself off. “What are you doing here, Farkle?”

 

“I wanted to talk to you.”

 

“Give me the conversation summary”, she said with a sigh and a wave of her hand.

 

“I owe you an apology”, Farkle said.

 

“You may continue”, Maya said with a shrug.

 

“I haven’t been a very good friend to you lately.”

 

“Farkle-”

 

“No, Maya. I’m serious. I was so concerned about Riley that I didn’t really even consider your feelings… maybe because I haven’t really talked to you about your feelings”, he made a face.

 

“That would be the Riley Effect, my dear Farkle”, she said with a sympathetic grin.

 

He just gave her an unimpressed look saying that he was not going to be dismissed from the conversation by her sarcasm.

 

Maya sighed. “Farkle, don’t you think that I, of all people, understand that you can’t have equal types of feelings for two completely different people?”

 

“Maya… I’m sorry. For New Years Eve… and everything else”, he said quietly, finally sitting down next to her.

 

She shrugged. “You chose Riley. I can’t blame you. Wasn’t I the one who made you a co-founder in the Riley Protection Committee? We always choose Riley. We can’t help it.”

 

He squinted at her suspiciously. “You do know how you feel… don’t you?” he asked carefully.

 

“Maybe”, she shrugged. “Maybe not. Maybe it doesn’t matter. What happened was what was supposed to happen. It’s fine.”

 

He stared incredulously, mouth dropping open and he pointed at her accusingly. “Maya?! Did you really do the same exact same thing I yelled at Riley about?!”

 

Maya shrugged a did unenthusiastic jazz hands. “Tada. Act Two has begun”, she deadpanned.

 

“Why?” he groaned helplessly, throwing himself onto his back. Having girl best friends didn’t used to be so dramatic.

 

She scoffed. “Riley couldn't handle the triangle. I mean, really, we were all falling apart. She refused to even talk about anything to do with Lucas. I tried, Farkle. I really tried. She covered here ears and made it about me not being me anymore! She was so convinced that I couldn't really be me and actually like Lucas she basically pushed me off a cliff without a parachute. That would have really solved the triangle, huh? Me not being me so much that I only liked Lucas because I became Riley?! Because if I was really me, I wouldn’t want Lucas because I couldn’t want a nice guy. That was really fun, let me tell ya.”

 

“That’s what she said to you?” Farkle sat up quickly, and absorbed her words in shock. He knew Riley went overboard when she wanted something, but he’d never known her to sabotage her best friend.

 

“She thought she was helping”, Maya said tonelessly. “And to be fair to her, I was a little lost.”

 

“You didn’t deserve that, Maya”, he whispered.

 

She shrugged. “Thanks.”

 

“I love you, Maya.”

 

“I know you do. I love you too.”

 

“Why won’t you be angry at me for what I did?” he complained. “Don’t let me off the hook!”

 

“You did what you thought was right”, she sighed. “How can I be mad about that?”

 

“I hurt you”, he said remorsefully. “And maybe if I hadn’t dropped Riley’s bomb on New Years- Do you want to borrow another diamond ring?” he offered.

 

She snorted. “No- well, yes.” Maya shook her head roughly trying to ignore the pull of shiny things. “No”, she finally decided. “It was always going to be Riley, Farkle. How could he not choose Riley? It’s what makes sense.”

 

“Maya? When do you get what you want?” He’d heard what she refused to say… that she thought if there was a choice between her and Riley, the easy choice would always be Riley.

 

“Maybe the next time around?” she suggested. “Maybe I really don't know what I want.”

 

“I don't think that’s true”, he said quietly.

 

She scoffed. “I don’t know. It’s never really happened before… me getting what I want.”

 

“I think we have to do something first “, he suggested quietly.

 

Maya frowned. “What is it?”

 

“It’s time to disband the Riley Protection Committee.”

 

“What?!”

 

“Maya, it’s time. The way we’ve protected her isn’t helping her anymore. And we’re hurting ourselves and other people.”

 

“Farkle-”

 

“When I had my five minute identity crisis and finally decided I wanted to change a bit to find out who I am, I told Lucas that any living organism has to be allowed to grow if it’s going to thrive. Maya, this applies to people too, not just plants. You let me grow, Maya. I experienced life outside of our little bubble. We have to do the same for Riley… and we have to do it for you too.”

 

Maya took a harsh breath and wiped at watery eyes and dropped her head on his shoulder. “I don’t want to lose her.”

 

“Did you ever think that she might actually understand you better if she saw more of the world?” he said gently.

 

“You’re not my baby bird anymore”, Maya complained half-heartedly.

 

“Maybe not”, he agreed, kissing the top of her head. “But I still love you.”

 

“But seriously”, Maya pulled away and narrowed her eyes at him. “Can we talk about your shoulders for a minute?” she said incredulously, sticking a finger out to poke at said shoulder while he tried to slap her hand away.

 

He blushed. “Maya!”

 

She laughed and pulled out her ‘Sally voice’. “Why you certainly are a sturdy young man-“

 

Farkle grabbed one of her pillows and bopped her face with it. “You know who else has great shoulders? Lucas!” he said pointedly. “You have to deal with that!”

 

“No!” she insisted before grabbing another pillow and smacking him with it as well.

 

“And his ridiculous face”, Farkle said exasperatedly.

 

Maya snorted. “Zay and I were just talking about how Lucas used to have a baby face”, she laughed and then scrunched her eyes shut making a pouty face. “And now he’s got a jaw that can probably cut glass, and it’s totally unfair!” she hissed angrily.

 

“It is kind of unfair”, Farkle nodded. “But you seem to like his ridiculous face, so… good luck with that”, he laughed.

 

Maya started pelting him with pillows and a few stray stuffed animals. The conversation ended in giggles and them both falling off the bed.

 

00

 

Several days later, she and Farkle took up residence in the bay window and waited for Riley.

 

“Are you sure we have to-“

 

“Maya.”

 

She sighed, shoulders drooping. “Fine.”

 

Riley came upstairs after dinner to find her two oldest friends in her bay window. She smiled cautiously, tilting her head. “What are you guys doing here?”

 

“Polar bears!” Maya exclaimed, looking crazed for a minute.

 

Farkle gave her the same look in return. “Really?”

 

“A polar bear breaks the ice!” she insisted with her Southern Belle voice.

 

“Take it easy there, Sally”, Farkle rolled his eyes in amusement.

 

“Guys?” Riley tried again, unable to stop herself from smiling at their banter.

 

“We need to talk to you”, Maya said, patting the cushion between them for Riley to sit down.

 

“That’s all the help you’re giving me, isn’t it?” Farkle said to Maya.

 

She grinned and nodded. “Absolutely!”

 

“We have to stop protecting you from life”, Farkle said, having earlier decided that it would be best to be blunt; they’d cushioned Riley’s feelings enough. They’d never wanted to hurt her, but they had also been less than truthful over the years, and it really was time to stop. “We’re your friends. Our job is to walk through life with you, not make sure you don’t see anything.”

 

“Are you sure we can’t just blindfold her?” Maya threw her hands up.

 

“Maybe put her on leash like a puppy?” he grinned at her.

 

“Hey!” Riley protested.

 

“Yeah”, Maya said hopefully.

 

“No!”

“I’m right here!” Riley said exasperatedly.

 

Farkle laughed. “Riley, when we were kids-”

 

“You were very, extremely gullible”, Maya interrupted, trying to sound upbeat.

 

“Maya had already experienced pain and loss, and she was barely six. I was a weird kid with no friends. And you-“

 

“You were sunshine”, Maya added quietly.

 

“Maya never wanted one bad thing to happen to you because she didn’t want you to change. And we went overboard.”

 

“I think”, Maya started unsteadily, “that instead of us just holding your hand and walking through life with you… we kind of protected you from a lot of life in general.” She looked at Farkle who took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly, and she plowed on. “We were wrong.”

 

“And now? You’ve got to do what you wouldn’t do while apple bobbing”, Farkle grinned.

 

Maya let out a watery laugh. “You have to wift your head, Wiley”, she said mimicking her little girl voice. She reached for Riley’s hand with her free one. She gave a confident nod. “It’s time.”

Notes:

Okay, trying to update for the fourth time. Maybe I have to break this chapter into three pieces. Ugh.Thanks to for the Kudos! Leave a review!

Chapter 3

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The next few weeks were fairly quiet considering all the drama just under the surface.

 

It was three weeks later when Riley and Lucas both happened to be looking for each other after school and when they ran into each other, they both said some version of ‘can we go somewhere and talk?’.

 

Lucas suggested that they go for a walk in the park.

 

“Do you want to talk first?” Lucas offered.

 

Riley frowned, thinking back to the extremely long conversation that she’d had with Farkle and Maya, one that hadn’t ended until they were all a bit watery around the eyes, and how Maya had reluctantly pointed out that Riley had basically steamrolled – Maya hadn’t used that word – the triangle. And that Riley hadn’t been very open to hearing anything she didn’t like. Maya had said she understood that Riley had done it to protect her own feelings, but that Lucas’s feelings probably should have factored into how the situation had ended.

 

“Great, now I’m the bulldozer in the pink sweater!” Riley had cried dramatically. She hadn’t been very accepting of the criticism at the time, but the more she thought about it, the more her eyes had opened to what had really happened. She couldn’t lie; there were still things she didn’t understand… things Maya refused to talk about, and even Farkle said that Maya needed time. So she tried. She wanted to fix the mess that was between all of them. And she couldn’t do that without listening. Her first cleanup was with Lucas. She owed both of them honesty, because she did love Lucas, truly, no matter what definition that took. And maybe she was still a lot confused about the ins and outs of falling in love, but she was certain that she always wanted him to be a part of her life.

 

Riley shook her head and smiled. “You first.”

 

“You sure?”

 

Riley sighed. “It was recently brought to my attention that I haven’t been listening very well lately. I’d really like to hear what you have to say.”

 

“Okay.” Lucas frowned, seeming not sure where to start. “You remember when Zay first got here?” he started. “And you were mad at me because you thought you didn’t know who I really was?”

 

Riley nodded. “I remember an epic water fight and being turned into a human fountain”, she raised an accusing eyebrow at him. But then she grinned. “And then I dumped a bucket of soapy water on your head.”

 

“I remember. I was there.” Lucas snorted in amusement. “Before that… at lunch? You wanted me to tell you that you weren’t wrong about me. And Maya actually called me by my name and told me that I needed to do what you wanted… because it was important to you and that made it equally important to her?”

 

Riley nodded slowly, a frown crossing her face. “Why are we talking about this now?” she asked softly.

 

“People change people, Riley. Right? How long have you spent trying to get Maya in a place where she feels safe enough to want things?”

 

“A long time…”

 

“Then why, after all the ways you fought for her happiness, did you think she was only happy because she pretended to be you?”

 

“I-“

 

“Maya would do anything for you, Riley. Even if it meant giving up her happiness and reverting back to the role of your troubled friend that you need to ‘save’… just so you could be happy.”

 

Riley stared absently in front of her. “Do you think I broke Maya?” she asked finally.

 

“Maya was never broken.”

 

“You really think I was wrong?” she asked softly.

 

He bit his lip and nodded. “I do. Do you remember being Dark Riley-?”

 

“Morotia”, she cut him off abruptly.

 

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, that. Let’s not do that ever again. Yeah? Okay.”

 

“She would have been an awful bunny farmer”, Riley shook her head in disappointment.

 

“Maya has experienced true pain that’s affected her entire life. I think she’s done her best to keep even an ounce of pain from touching you. And she’s done such a good job at it, she thinks it for the best… even if it ends up hurting her.”

 

“I broke Maya-”

 

“What’s her biggest fear, Riley?”

 

“Ballerinas!”

 

“Try again?” he suggested gently, raising his eyebrows.

 

“Losing people”, she said quietly.

 

He reached over and held her hand. “Could you ever hate her?”

 

“No. Not ever.”

 

“I know.”

 

“Lucas? How do you feel about Maya?” she whispered.

 

He let out a laugh and ran a hand through his hair. “Turning this around on me? That’s fair.”

 

Riley rolled her eyes. “I know you care about her. To be clear, we can’t be friends if you don’t like Maya.” She gestured between them, nodding seriously.

 

He grinned briefly. “I know. You two are a package deal. Although, I didn’t really ask you to talk about Maya.”

 

“So?” she prompted.

 

“It’s complicated”, he offered with a shrug.

 

“It’s all getting complicated now, isn’t it? Just... try?”

 

“I know I don’t want to lose her as a friend”, he answered finally. “I like when she’s happy.”

 

“She makes you laugh”, Riley offered. It was strange to notice the absence of pain she felt now at hearing Lucas’s thoughts about Maya.

 

“Yeah, she does.”

 

“You think she’s pretty”, Riley sing-songed teasingly.

 

“Well-“

 

She laughed. “You seriously texted Zay calling her ‘Blonde Beauty’?”

 

“How about we pretend that didn’t happen”, Lucas nodded emphatically.

 

Riley snorted. “I don’t think so, buddy.”

 

“And I’m back to ‘buddy’”, he sighed dramatically.

 

She nudged him with her shoulder and directed them to sit on a bench.

 

Lucas let his head fall back and glared at the sky. “I never wanted to come between the two of you.”

 

Riley shook her head immediately. “Lucas, no. This wasn’t anybody’s fault.”

 

“Not sure if I believe that”, he muttered.

 

“You believe there’s no such thing as coincidence, right? That we eventually get guided to where we need to be if we watch for the signs?”

 

“Basically”, Lucas shrugged.

 

“I believe you were meant to be here, in New York, with all of us. No matter what happens, no matter how we change and grow… we do it together.”

 

“I hope so. I always want all of you to be a part of my life.”

 

“So…” Riley started, suddenly wanting answers for all the things that didn’t make sense to her. “Just out of curiosity - for science - how long did it take exactly, from the time I when I left the two of you alone by the fire until you grabbed her by the face and then didn’t kiss her?!”

 

“We were arguing!” he protested.

 

“Have you ever considered even once to almost kiss me when we’re fighting?” she demanded.

 

“No!”

 

“Uh-huh. How long?” she demanded.

 

Lucas groaned. “Less than ten minutes.”

 

Riley stared at him incredulously and then burst out laughing. This was ridiculous. “Lucas!”

 

“Riley! I’m serious!”

 

“Oh, I know you are”, she promised, stifling giggles. “That’s why I’m laughing. Lucas? The person you are with me isn’t the same person you are with Maya, and both of those parts of you are true. I love you, and I think we’ll make sure we’re a part of each other’s lives forever. But… if the secret to life is that people change people… do you think we’ll change each other?”

 

He frowned. “I don’t know how to answer that. I know I’m not the same person I was before I moved here.”

 

“Why were you fighting with Maya?” she asked abruptly.

 

Lucas shrugged. “Because I wanted to know if you were telling the truth… and it felt like she was lying to me.”

 

“And it mattered to you?” Riley prodded. “It mattered whether or not she had feelings for you?”

 

“I- yes?” he frowned, not understanding what she was asking.

 

“Why?”

 

He gave her a sideways glance. “What do you mean why?”

 

“I mean… if you didn’t already have some kind of feelings for her, why did you care so much whether she was lying about it or not. You could have left it alone”, she shrugged. “Or you could have let Maya sidestep her way out of the conversation, which she is very good at.”

 

“I don’t know. I couldn’t let it go.”

 

“Lucas, was this”, she gestured between them, “was it what you expected?” Riley asked curiously.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I don't know. I just have been thinking about the last year, and all the times I’ve worried I wouldn’t live up to my parents’ legacy… and it seems like every time I try to make myself more like them, the universe slaps me in the face and tells me I have to be my own person. I’ve just been wondering if I expected you to be something you’re not because it’s what I needed. And that wasn’t very fair of me.”

 

He sighed. “Riley… I’ve liked you since the day we met.”

 

“I’ve liked you since the day we met too. You don't know this, but I was trying to be Maya that day”, she admitted with a laugh. “It was my first time riding the subway. I told her I wanted to be bad like her, and so I put on her lip gloss. I thought I was really bad.”

 

Lucas grinned. “Yeah?”

 

“Maya’s life always seemed like such an adventure. She’s known practically everyone on our subway route for years. I’ve always wanted to be confident like Maya. She never lets anyone see how much she cares. I thought for a long time that she didn’t. She just… she took care of me and Farkle. And we didn’t even realize. She saw you, and we were talking about talking to boys, and she told me it wasn’t that hard. She said she was going to teach me all about relationships, and she skipped across the car- what did she even say to you that day?” Riley frowned.

 

Lucas raised his eyebrows. “You never asked her?”

 

Her head tilted. “No? That’s weird, isn't it? I got a bit distracted when she let me fly into your lap”, she admitted with a shrug.

 

“We had a thirty second speed date, and at the end she dumped me”, he admitted with a laugh.

 

“Wait, what?” Riley shook her head incredulously. “When she came back, she told me that you guys just broke up. I kind of thought she was kidding.”

 

He squinted, dredging up the old memory… his first time being completely blindsided by Maya’s force of nature personality. Lucas grinned and took a deep breath. “’Hi, I’m Maya. You’re really cute. We should hang out some time. You make me happy. You don't pay enough attention to me. This isn’t working out. It’s you, not me. We can still be friends. Not really.’

 

“Oh, you got Maya’d”, Riley said with wide eyes.

 

“Then she left and you were in my lap. In was the most interesting thirty seconds I’d had since I got to New York.”

 

“And now?” Riley asked. “We’ve all been through a lot since then. How’s it rate now?”

 

“It still makes the top ten”, he grinned.

 

Riley sucked in air. The realization of the situation they were in, and the turmoil her best friend was probably still hiding from her, washed over Riley like cold water. “Go talk to her.”

 

“Riley-”

 

“No, Lucas. I don’t know what our relationship is going to look like in the future, but I know we’re going to have one. You mean too much to me to ever not be a part of my life, but no one else has ever fought me to protect Maya”, she said quietly.

 

And this wasn’t even the first time it had happened. Lucas hadn’t been happy the day Maya ran out of Topanga’s only to be brought back by the cops.

 

Riley was fairly certain that Maya still hadn’t heard that Lucas had yelled at Riley for accusing Maya of stealing money while Katy was working.

 

“This isn’t a joke, Riley! Tell me you don’t seriously believe Maya would steal! Picking up a five dollar bill off the ground - that she willingly put back, by the way - is not the same as stealing from where her mom works. Maya isn’t a thief, Riley. She’s your best friend. You should know who she is.”

 

Lucas left. It took a minute for Riley and Farkle to go after him and the three to agree they needed to find Maya.

 

Much later, way too late to prevent the metaphorical avalanche that almost took them all out, Riley would think of this moment and realize that she had been the one to push Maya off the mountain.

 

“Except when Uncle Shawn called me ‘baby Cory’… something I’m still mildly insulted about…” Riley continued, shaking her head and tried to focus. “I’ve been watching my best friend disappear. She won’t say what she wants, she won’t argue with me, and she refuses to stand up for herself. I don’t know if she’ll let me help her now… or even if I can. We’ve been who we are for so long… I think we both know I don’t do well with change.”

 

“Change is hard”, he said. “But it can be good too. Like me moving here… or Zay moving here-“

 

“Or Maya being happy”, Riley whispered. “I tried to take that from her… and she let me. She’s my best friend. And her being happy is all I’ve wanted for her our whole lives. Why did I do that? She tried to tell me how she felt and I wouldn’t believe her.”

 

“I think we’re all a little confused right now”, Lucas muttered, running a hand through his hair. “And I think sometimes… you both go too far to protect each other’s feelings.”

 

“You mean Maya-“

 

“Oh no. You do it too”, Lucas nodded rapidly, then winced. “No offense.”

 

Riley stared incredulously. “Kinda offense!” she insisted. Then she rolled her eyes. “I want Maya to be happy, and I know you do too. If your feelings for her are what they sound like they might be? Lucas, you have to tell her. Because I think we both know you don’t feel the same way about me.”

 

“Riley-” he protested.

 

“Lucas, I love you. And I know you love me… maybe it doesn’t matter what we call it”, she said softly. “But I don’t think the feelings you have for me are anywhere close to what you feel for Maya. And… maybe I don't have those feelings for you either.” She frowned. “And I think we both deserve fire, don’t you?”

 

Lucas groaned. “That stupid yearbook.”

 

“And this?” she gestured between them, “It doesn't hurt like it used to… knowing how much you like Maya. It feels… right. Somehow.” Riley smiled a bit sadly. “I wish I’d seen it then… but I do now. I get it. Now, Maya needs to see it too.”

 

He frowned, “I don’t think I’m the one she needs to talk to right now. And you should probably do it before she elopes with your uncle.” Lucas couldn't help but grimace.

 

Riley’s eyes widened comically, nose scrunching in disgust. “Yeah, that gets weirder the longer I think about it.” She stood up and held out her hand. “We’re both right. Maya needs both of us. No more secrets”, she said firmly. “Come on.”

Notes:

Chapter 2 on FF(.)net is the same as Chapters 2-4 on this site because of the stupid character count. Thanks for reading. Hope you enjoy.

Chapter 4

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Lucas followed Riley back to her apartment where they found Maya in the kitchen with Josh. Riley stared at them for several long moments before taking a breath and stealing herself.

 

“Uncle Josh”, she announced. “I love you, but you gots to go”, she pointed.

 

Lucas reached over and adjusted her hand so it was pointing at the door and not the side window.

 

“Riley-”

 

“Maya, shush”, Riley flapped a hand at her.

 

Maya’s eyes widened. “You just shushed me?! I beg your pardon!”

 

Riley met Josh as he exited the kitchen and she smiled innocently. She looped her arm through his and led him to the door. “If you’ll excuse us, we have some unfinished business to take care of… but feel free to continue your conversation with Maya once we’re all a bit closer to thirty.” She opened the door and deposited him in the hallway. “My mommy is a lawyer, and I know stuff. Love you. Bye-bye.” He was squinting at her curiously before she slammed the door in his face… and then she locked it.

 

“What did you do that for?” Maya whined as the door closed.

 

By the time Riley turned around, Maya turned her glare to Lucas.

 

“What. Did. You. Do?!” Maya demanded through clenched teeth.

 

“Why are you blaming me?” he protested.

 

“Uchh, because it’s always you!”

 

Riley made an ‘eep’ noise even though the fury wasn’t directed at her yet. She could do this. She pointed at Maya. “You get back in this triangle right now!” Riley demanded.

 

“Oh”, Maya shook her head. “Yeah, no. The triangle is dead and buried, Riles. And last I checked, digging up graves is illegal.”

 

“Mayaaaa-“

 

“Not doing it!” Maya insisted as she ran around the island to escape Riley.

 

“Oh, you’re doing it!” Riley insisted running around the corner to block Maya.

 

“Riley! Quit pushing!”

 

“No! I’m not very good at being wrong, Maya- I don’t have enough practice at it”, she squinted comically. “But I told you that you deserved to have everything you ever wanted. I meant it then, and I still do! Why did you let me stomp all over your happiness like Godzilla?!”

 

Maya scoffed. “Riles, you’re hardly Godzilla.”

 

“Here’s what’s going to happen”, Riley said, crossing her arms in an attempt to be stern. “The three of us are all going to talk. And we’re going to agree to tell the truth… even if it’s hard.”

 

“I don’t know what the truth is anymore”, Maya said flatly.

 

“I’ll tell you something true”, Lucas said finally. He was still leaning against the back of the couch, temporarily content to let them chase each other, but prepared to stop Maya from making a run for it.

 

The both looked over like they’d forgotten he was there. At least some things were still normal. Maya glanced up reflexively and immediately avoided his gaze. She closed her eyes and tried to contain her temper. “You again”, she practically growled.

 

“Riley is your best friend, and you’re never going to lose her.”

 

“Thank you, Dr. Phil”, Maya snorted.

 

“Maya”, he sighed exasperatedly. “You aren’t going to lose me either. I didn’t realize what I was missing until I met you guys. And I can’t imagine what life would be like without you in it.”

 

Maya mimes gagging in disgust, but he waits her out until she rolls her eyes and shrugs. “Sure you can, Buckaroo. It would be full-time Riley Town… and you seem like you like it there just fine”, she shrugged dismissively. “I don’t exactly blame you, since I take the odd vacation there-“

 

“I’m not asking you to be something you’re not”, Lucas glared at her. “I liked you when we met, and I still like you now. Who you are hasn’t changed that much. Not really. But the way you let people see you… that has. I like Riley Town because that’s part of who she is.”

 

“Stop acting like you know me, Lucas.”

 

Riley stares in disbelief. “Maya, please- I never should have said what I did. You deserve a nice boy if you want one. Lucas doesn’t belong in your Dungeon of Sadness with the ballerinas!”

 

Lucas blinked. Yikes.

 

“Riley?” Maya glared angrily, teeth clenched. “I’m only going to say this once: stop throwing me under the bus! You can’t control everything! Including me. My feelings are mine. And you can’t just pull them out and dump them on the floor to poke with a stick whenever you want to!”

 

“Maya, please just-”

 

“Lucas is free to go to whatever land he likes, Riley. I hear Australia is nice. Maybe he can be Ranger Rick the ‘Roo Wrangler.” She waggled her eyebrows teasingly at Lucas. “Say that three times.”

 

“Can you be serious for five minutes?” Lucas asked exasperatedly.

 

Maya’s eye twitched and she held up a finger. “I don’t think you understand”, she said slowly. “I would rather be butt-naked in an eel tank right now than do whatever emotionally vulnerable malarkey that this conversation is trying to be!”

 

Riley shrieked. “Maya!”

 

“You’re not the boss of me!” Maya yelled back. “My life is not going to turn into an episode of ‘The Bachelor’! Do we even know ten other girls?!”

 

“Would you stop!” Lucas yelled over them both before Maya could do what she did best… distract Riley. But he hadn’t thought that through, and they both winced.

 

Maya turned her laser eyes in his direction, finger pointing accusingly. “Not cool, Lucas! Not cool!”

 

He held both hands up innocently. “Sorry.”

 

“Oh, you’re not sorry yet”, she muttered with a glare.

 

“We’ll come back to that later”, Riley raised an eyebrow. “Maya, we have to talk about this!”

 

“I can’t hear you-”

 

Riley gestured for Lucas. “Get her.”

 

“That wasn’t the plan!” Lucas complained, even as he stepped into the space at the other end of the table… but it would be exactly like Maya to attempt jumping over the table if she really wanted to leave.

 

“This was Plan F: Force Maya to Listen to Us!” Riley insisted.

 

Maya rolled her eyes. “You two are a lot of drama”, she grumbled. She regretted speaking immediately when Lucas focused back on her fully.

 

“Maya, what happened between you and me-“

 

“There is no ‘you and me’!” she shouted, making Riley jump. “Lucas- stop pretending you and I are even an option”, Maya sighed aggressively.

 

He glared down at her. “Is everything a double standard with you?”

 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about-”

 

“Maya!”

 

“Leave it alone, Ranger Rick.”

 

Lucas probably really did need to dial it down a few notches, but she was infuriating. He wasn’t wrong about her either. She’d given him to Riley without a thought for herself, the same way she’d never let him close again because it might hurt her best friend. If he chose Riley, or even if he didn’t, he would lose Maya either way. Maya would never trust anyone who made Riley sad.

 

Maya was worse than he was when it came to self-sabotage… and neither of them were certain of anything now.

 

“Maya, we have to talk about what happened in Texas.”

 

“We swore never to bring that up again!”

 

“How’s that working out for you?” he threw his hands up.

 

“Great! Fine! Thanks!” Maya yelled sarcastically.

 

Meanwhile, Riley was watching the way they paced back and forth on either side of her kitchen island. Her eyes just kept opening wider, and finally she shrieked, “You guys never talked about it?!?”

 

Maya whipped around and stared at her best friend. She opened and closed her mouth several times before saying innocently, “Talked about what?”

 

Riley tried not to explode like a volcano.

 

Maya shook her head. “Nothing happened.”

 

“But the two of you went on a date!” Riley insisted. “How could you not talk about it?”

 

Maya raised an eyebrow. “You really think that was a ‘date’?” she asked incredulously. “Something that only happened because you wanted everything to be even… Sitting there being stared at by our friends? Did you really think that was going to go well?”

 

Riley opened and closed her mouth a few times.

 

The apartment door was unlocked and opened.

 

“Why was the door locked like Fort Knox?” Topanga asked Cory behind her.

 

“Hold the door! I’m leaving!” Maya called jovially as she practically ran to the door. “Later, Matthews!” she offered, patting his shoulder and disappearing into the hallway.

 

“Maya, wait!” Riley called, voice full of concern as she ran after her.

 

A few seconds later she came back alone. She looked at Lucas. “She’s gone.”

 

“I was only gone an hour!” Topanga said exasperatedly. “Riley, what happened?”

 

“This is all my fault”, Riley muttered sadly as she threw herself onto the couch. “I dropped Peaches on her head. Now she’s all banged up!”

 

Topanga frowned, squinting at Lucas. “And in English?” she tried.

 

“Riley may have-”

 

“May have?!” Riley interrupted with her face smothered in a throw pillow.

 

“She pushed Maya too far”, he muttered under his breath.

 

“I broke Maya!”

 

“You hurt her”, Lucas clarified. “You didn’t break her. Maya is not broken.”

 

“How could I do that to her?”

 

Lucas sighed. “You know… you guys need to understand that you’re two whole people on your own. Yes, you balance each other out… but-” he shook his head. “You guys aren’t half a person when you’re apart. And things aren’t always going to be the same.”

 

“He’s right”, Topanga said gently.

 

“What do we do?” Riley asked desperately. “How can we fix it when she just keeps running away from us?”

 

“You’re going to have to be patient. Be there for Maya when she’s ready”, Cory said.

 

“Patient!” Riley complained crossing her arms. “I’m not good at that!” And then she groaned. “We probably should have told her we broke up”, she sighed.

 

“Did we?” Lucas frowned. “Break up?”

 

“I wanted us all to talk”, Riley said. “But… I think we did?”

 

“Are you okay, Riley?” Topanga asked carefully.

 

Riley shrugged. “I think so. I mean, it’s not awesome, but I think we’re doing the right thing. Lucas?”

 

He sighed and nodded. “I think we’re doing the right thing too.”

 

“For the right reasons?” Cory asked.

 

Riley smiled and looked at Lucas. “We tried. I don’t regret that. It didn’t work the way either us expected. But we’re still friends, right?”

 

“I always want us to be friends”, he smiled back.

 

“Then we will be”, Riley nodded. Then she pointed at Lucas accusingly. “But he can’t be friends with Maya?”

 

Cory sighed. It never could be easy. “Why?” he groaned.

 

“Because he wants to kiss her face!” Riley insisted.

 

Cory began glaring.

 

Topanga sighed. “Oh, boy. Lucas?” she suggested. “You should probably run.”

 

Lucas agreed instantly. “I’m out! Later, Riley!” He made it through the front door while Cory tried to jump over the couch.

 

Topanga looked down at her daughter. “Are you really okay?”

 

Riley scrunched her nose as she considered her feelings. “I’m not sad. I thought I would be, but I’m not. I actually… I feel pretty good. Is that weird?”

 

Topanga shook her head. “Sometimes the scary thing is the right thing to do… but sometimes? Sometimes we can just feel peace with our decisions and know it was right. Is that how you feel?”

 

“That’s exactly how I feel”, she said honestly. “I also feel like Dad can’t kill Lucas because he still has to tell Maya he has feelings at her!” Riley stood up and went through the door her father had left open.

 

“At her?” Topanga repeated in confusion.

 

“Yeah”, Riley nodded insistently. “They haven’t hit her yet.”

 

“Ah, got it”, Topanga muttered.

 

“Dad!” Riley yelled down the stairwell. “Stop trying to murder Lucas!”

Notes:

Okay, this is the last section of what was supposed to be the second chapter! This fic is pretty conversation heavy, but this whole Triangle Debacle needed a lot more honesty that we didn’t get. Also, there is at least one plot-hole in that I’m taking liberties with, but I mean… Riley barely started riding the subway, and I’d bet Maya went with her mom to acting auditions when she was young, never mind all her neighborhood wanderings. So, I mean, where would Riley know where to get a horse from? Maya knows everybody, and if she doesn’t know someone, she’ll go talk to them. It is canon. Maya definitely knew where to get a horse from and wanted Riley to have her princess moment. Leave a review! Thanks for reading. The fandom is pretty dead and it’s sad.

Chapter 5

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Three days later:

It took some serious text bombing and Ring Power Promising that Lucas wasn’t there , Riley got Maya to agree to come back over to talk in the bay window .

Maya, this is my fault-“

It’s nobody’s fault, Riley. It just… happened.”

I was jealous”, Riley said finally. “You and Lucas have some kind of connection that he and I will never have-“

Riles-”

No, Maya. I know you. I should have known what that meant. I should have known how much  he   means to you. Instead I basically sabotaged you. It’s not okay, Maya. It’s not. You, my best friend, you are good enough. Whoever it is that you want to be. I had no right to tell you that you weren’t you.”

But I was different-“

Maya… you’re never going to be me”, Riley said softly. “No matter how happy you are, you’re still  you . And you deserve the best. You hurt yourself so I wouldn’t get hurt! I never want that, Maya. Not ever! That stupid triangle was killing you. I tried not to see it. But I see it, Maya. I really do.”

What about how you feel about him, Riley?”

I don’t know how I feel about him. Whatever Lucas and I are, I think that’s how we’ll always be. But you two? You could become something  amazing . Maya”, Riley said quietly, “you’ve always been brave for me. You need to be brave for yourself now. Give yourself a chance.”

I’m tired of all this , Riley. Can’t we just ignore it?”

No, Maya. We can’t.”

That’s not the answer I was hoping for”, Maya whi mper ed dramatically .

Riley threw her arms around Maya, hugging her tightly. “I know. You have to talk to Lucas.”

I don’t wanna.”

“Maya-”

“Maybe in about a year… or five”, Maya deadpanned.

Riley let out an incredulous whine. “Maya.”

Maya snickered.

00

After her conversation with Maya that led to nothing happening, Riley did what she did best. She went into detective mode. She couldn’t very well go back to Texas, but she wanted to understand the source of the problem better, so she tried to go back to the beginning of all the confusion.

Her first stop was Topanga’s. She needed to talk to Maya’s mom.

It wasn’t a long conversation, but Katy had confirmed what Riley had realized far too late… Maya had never truly become Riley. Although Katy had readily admitted that Maya had been a bit lost for a while.

Her second task required a phone call to her uncle Josh.

When she hung up from a very infuriating, forty-minute long conversation , Riley let out a shriek of anger she’d been holding back . “Are you  kidding  me?!”

A guy passing her on his bicycle dropped his phone and nearly swerved into a fire hydrant… but Riley didn’t notice.

She got home as quickly as possible.

Mom! Dad!” she yelled as she slammed the door to their apartment closed.

Topanga came down the stairs with Cory following behind her.

What in the world- Riley, what’s wrong?”

She looked past her mother. “Daddy, are you incredibly attached to your idiot brother?” she asked with a scary smile.

“Riley, don’t call your uncle Eric an idiot”, Topanga scolded, sounding shocked.

Oh, no, no, no, no”, Riley shook her head. “The other one!”

Cory frowned. “What did Josh do?”

Do you know what he said to Maya?! In the ski trip from-”

Riley!”

Heck! Yeah, I said it!  Heck! her eyes were blazing with fury.

Topanga pressed her lips together, fighting between amusement at Riley’s terrible attempts at foul language, and concern over the fact that her daughter was incredibly angry. She let out a breath, nodding to the kitchen table. “Why don’t we sit, and you can explain what happened?”

Riley paced another minute, wanting to tear her hair out, before following her parents.

She relayed the conversation she’d had with Josh. When she was finished, her parents were also visibly frustrated.

He hurt Maya”, Riley said helplessly.

Maybe we should have been a bit less hands off with this situation ”, Topanga said after a few minutes of silence. “Riley? You do whatever you need to do to take care of Maya. Everything is going to be okay.

Maya is avoiding all of us like we have rabies!” Riley complained. “I’ve had all my shots, haven’t I?!”

Keep trying”, Topanga said with a sigh as she stood. “Start over tomorrow. Cory, order dinner. I’ll be late.”

Wait! Where are you going?”

I’m going to talk to Katy.”

00

The next day, Katy strong-armed Maya to the Matthews’.

“I don’t need an intervention!” Maya whined.

“This isn’t an intervention”, Topanga promised, opening her arms and pulling Maya into a hug, drawing her towards the kitchen table. “Come sit down.” Topanga sat next to Cory and Maya found herself on the opposite bench between her mom and Riley.

Riley slipped her arm through Maya’s.

Cory sighed, sending Maya a sympathetic look. “You know… if you put half as much effort in for yourself as you put towards making things happy for Riley, you could probably have whatever you wanted. It’s important to invest in the people around us. But it’s equally important to invest in ourselves.”

I’m so proud of you guys for the way you support each other”, Cory said gently. “But sometimes, being true to yourself means putting yourself above the people around you. And true friends want as much for each other as they do for themselves.”

Maya”, Topanga said seriously. “We owe you an apology.”

For what?”

We were wrong.”

Maya frowned. “Wrong about what?”

Topanga sighed. “I think we’ve put a lot of pressure on you without realizing. We couldn’t have picked another person to be Riley’s best friend. You coaxed a tiny flower out of her pod and basically became her umbrella, protecting her from the elements. You’ve always done everything you could to make sure she never got bruised by the world. No mater how much we know Riley has to experience the world, we’ve still wanted to keep her safe.”

“Topanga, it’s scary out there!” Cory hissed, pointing toward the window.

She rolled her eyes at her husband. “Maya, honey… your happiness is not secondary to Riley’s. As much as we want Riley to grow and become a well-rounded person, we want the same for you.”

Katy hugged her daughter gently. “I’m so proud of whoever you’re going to be. You don’t need to lose yourself to make anyone happy. As long as you’re happy, Maya… that’s all that matters.”

00

F or the next few weeks, May a went to all her classes, she sat with her friends at lunch, but said as little as possible.

Okay, this is ridiculous!” Riley threw her hands up when Maya was nowhere to be found after school.

"What is this place? Part of Hogwarts?" Farkle complained. "This is the third time!"

"Maybe you're just too slow", Zay muttered.

"Third time for me. Seventh time total", Farkle corrected with a grimace. "Lucas was trying to catch up with her before he decided maybe she just didn't want to talk to him... He sent me instead. She freaking disappears in this hallway. We've both waited for her to come out and ended up late for class."

"Sooo... Your scientific solution is that this must be Hogwarts?" Zay asked skeptically.

"Shut up", Farkle muttered.

Yeah, but what are we gonna do about it?” Zay asked, easily ignoring Farkle’s grumbling .

I think we’re out of easy options”, Riley said biting her bottom lip. “I have a plan”, she suggested. “But it could get ugly”, she looked at Lucas.

Worse than this is already ?!” he threw his hands up.

Riley made a face. “You’re going to have to deal with Angry Maya.”

Lucas sighed. “Okay… but I don’t think I should tie her up again.”

Zay stared between them. “Do you guys even listen to yourselves?”

No rope tricks”, Riley confirmed. She looked at Farkle.

Let’s plan an ambush”, Farkle said.

They walked away in frustration, not noticing that someone had overheard their conversation, someone who knew exactly how to find what - and who - they were looking for.

The senior shook his head at the Harry Potter reference and went to find the girl Nikki had dubbed 'Spunky'.

0

Maya was startled by the door opening behind her, but she recognized the large figure immediately even in the semi-darkness of the theater.

"You just scared a literal day from my lifespan", she hissed.

He chuckled. "Sorry. You found the theater cubby hole, huh? Everyone forgets there's a door to get in here. Even the drama department only uses it during stage production. A few of them probably hide in here to make out... but, I've never run into anyone."

"I stole your thinking spot?" Maya asked wryly.

He laughed under his breath, shaking his head. "Freshman year, Nikki decided she'd rather go exploring than go to lunch. Francesca says, 'let's go spelunking!' I just followed them down the hallway yelling 'Lunch is only twenty minutes long!'... They don't listen to me", he shrugged. "Anyway, we ended up finding this place. It's quiet in here... nice to get away from all that stuff happening", he nodded back to the hallway on the other side of the closed door.

Maya chuckled. "I should go. Let you do whatever footballers do... think or whatever."

"I actually was looking for you."

She raised a suspicious eyebrow.

He grinned. "Still don't trust me, Spunky?"

"Why would I wanna do that exactly, Thor?" she retorted mildly.

"Okay, I have an actual name", he protested.

"Uh-huh. Get Francesca and Nikki to quit calling me Spunky first."

"Never mind", he grumbled. "You're friends are looking for you."

"And you're heading up a search party? I don't see a flare gun." Her head tilted curiously.

"Your genius friend? Finkle?"

"Farkle", Maya snorted.

"Really? Wow. Anyway... he called this place Hogwarts because you kept disappearing in this hallway. I knew where you would be."

“And you followed me why?”

Why are you hiding from your friends, Maya?”

She rolled her eyes grudgingly. “I tried to murder the triangle and it bit me in the butt.”

Thor winced. “Ah. Gotcha.”

So, if it’s all the same to you”, she raised an eyebrows, “I’m just going to wait it out.”

It might be the easy thing to do”, Thor said. “But while you’re in here? Your friends are out there where life is happening to them. And that’s something you’re missing while you’re in here being safe.”

Maya sighed, knowing he was more than a little bit right. “Do you ever regret not just making a decision? L ike it’s just a waste of time where people could be happy, and somebody can move on?”

He nodded slightly. “Sometimes.”

“This really sucks”, she sighed.

0 0

You can’t keep doin’ this”, Zay said when he found Maya in their usual spot at Topanga’s doing her homework.

Actually, I’ve been told that I have to keep doing this”, she gestured stubbornly to her homework. “My mother made threats if I made below a B average. She’s not usually that parent , but I have no desire to test my fate this year”, she said grimly.

“Yeah, okay. Where’d you go?”

“Secret door”, she shrugged.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah”, Maya grinned. “Maybe we do really go to Hogwarts.”

Zay eyed her suspiciously. “You didn't go far, did you?”

Despite this complete disaster… no. I’m not going to disappear completely. I just need some air once in a while.”

Well, you’ve got a few minutes before everybody shows up.”

“And I get yelled at?” Maya wrinkled her nose. “Did she hit maximum Riley yet?”

Zay grinned knowingly . “You’re gonna wish that’s what happened.”

Maya groaned. “ Tell me she didn't drag Lucas into this.”

Drag?” Zay snorted. “You’re kidding, right?” He stared at her while she just blinked irritably. “Oh, you’re serious”, he grimaced. “He does actually care about you, you know? Try to get that through your head.

We’re friends. And I’m part of that package deal he subscribed to with Riley”, Maya said, attempting to ignore Zay.

“Girl, I know you’re not that dumb.”

Zay. Leave it be. Riley wanted Prince Charming. And Lucas likes that she see him that way. It’s fine.”

“You’re not fine”, he said pointedly.

I will be”, she shrugged. “Eventually. Things will go back to normal.”

He eyed her skeptically. “I still think you’re wrong, and it’s going to blow up in your face  spectacularly … but I’ve got your back.”

You’re good people, Babineaux.”

Zay sighed. “So are you, Hart. So are you.”

Maya sighed and went back to her Geometry homework. Zay pulled out his own books and they were making progress when the rest of their friends came in and took their spots.

Riley threw herself at Maya. “Peaches! There you are!”

Maya patted her back, vaguely amused. “Missed you too, Riles.”

“What about me?” Farkle grinned.

“I missed your shoulders”, she teased.

“Maya!” he protested, pretending to be scandalized. “Not in front of Smackle!”

She bit her lip and tried not to laugh. “ Sorry, honey”, she playfully apologized.

“You are not”, he disagreed, shaking his head with a grin. “I missed you too.”

Maya rolled her eyes, preparing to brush him off with a joke, but she knew her friends were worried about her. “I didn’t go anywhere, Farkle. Not really”, she shrugged a bit, pointedly ignoring the looks of concern.

Z ay groaned. “Will you two idiots please just tell her you broke up already?!”

Maya froze. He’d better be kidding. She looked up. Oh, they were serious. She held back several curse words.

L ucas winced. “We tried to tell you-”

Why didn’t you stop her!?” Maya snapped at Lucas, voice raising as she stood up . “We share at least 50/50 custody of Riley right now – although I’ll probably take at least sixty-five because of my experience level. That means when she tries to go to Cuckoo Town, you’ve gotta pull the Emergency Brake!”

Riley’s eyes boggled. “Cuckoo Town?!”

It’s two rights and a left past RileyTown!” Maya kept yelling.

Oh, boy”, Lucas muttered.

But Riley took a deep breath. “I’m going to ignore that for now because I know you have a summer home in RileyTown and you want to live in the sun with me. You’re not going to distract me, Maya.”

Maya stuck her tongue out and flopped back in her seat, crossing her arms in a pout. She sighed and looked up. “You okay, Riles?” she asked quietly.

Riley tilted her head and smiled a bit. “I’m good.” She glanced at Lucas. “We both are.”

It was the right thing to do”, Lucas agreed.

00

Shawn and Katy came home from their dinner date just after nine.

“Maya?” Katy called. The apartment smelled like brownies.

“Kitchen”, Maya answered.

Katy leaned over the breakfast bar to see her daughter sitting on the floor. The oven was on, and a pan was inside baking. Maya? She was sitting on the floor hugging the brownie batter streaked mixing bowl and despondently sucking on the edge of a wooden spoon.

“What happened to you?” Shawn asked, doing his best not to laugh. She had batter on her cheek and nose.

Maya continued pouting. “Riley dumped Lucas”, she answered after a minute.

Katy winced. She didn’t need further explanation. “Oh, baby girl. I guess you don't want your chicken piccata?”

After I eat the brownies”, she grumbled around the spoon.

Notes:

A/N: Sorry, sorry, sorry! I wanted this finished before the holidays, and that did not happen. This is not abandoned. The last few chapters are mostly finished. Just shuffling things around and cleaning this up. A happy ending is in the near future!

Chapter 6

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The following Friday:

Maya, we have to talk about this-"

Nothing to talk about, Ranger Rick.”

I disagree.”

So do the rest of us”, Riley said, gesturing to their other friends.

She scrunched her nose, pouting at the betrayal. “Good for you. I don’t care.”

Lucas pinched the bridge of his nose.“We have to talk about-"

You don’t have to do this”, she started quietly.

His eyes narrow at her, because after all this time, he can sense her brush offs coming. “Do  what ?” he asks tightly.

Her eyes widened slightly at the warning in his tone. She shook it off deliberately and continued. “We’ve never talked about it, but this isn’t some all or nothing type of thing. I know you never really got to make a choice here, but I wanna be really clear here… you don’t just have to pick me because you didn’t pick Riley - or however that worked out.”

Uh-oh”, Farkle muttered.

Maya-“

No, I’m serious. You can pick nobody… or- geez, Missy. Seriously, not Missy, but someone else-”

Can anyone else see the train crash?” Riley hissed, biting nervously at her thumbnail.

Maya ”, he tried again, but she couldn’t stop the words that were liberating themselves from her mouth.

You‘ll probably have to give me like ten minutes here, but we can go back to just being friends. All I’m asking is that you’re honest about it. If you don’t-  it’s fine . But if you’re doing this because you think you have to, and you- I won’t put myself through this again”, she finished softly.

He waited until her teeth clicked shut. “Do I get to talk now?” Lucas vaguely wondered if he even had the words to tell her how much he wanted to take care of her… if Maya would let him or attempt to get him in a headlock instead.

She grimaced, crossing her eyes angrily for half a second, and gnawed on her bottom lip. “ I don't want to do this right now ”, she muttered finally . Maya grabbed her textbook and shoved it into her backpack.

Maya, we are going to have to talk about this at some point”, Lucas sighed.

There’s nothing to talk about!” she called without looking back.

Yes, there is!” Riley wailed.

I can’t hear you”, she sang, dancing away from him and down the hallway.

He made an irritated noise as she turned away from him, glaring daggers before stalking after her. He snagged one of the belt loops on her jeans and dragged her into the next empty classroom despite her protesting and shut the door.

Zay stared after them wide-eyed. “Well, that escalated quickly.”

You did not just do that!” Maya stared at him incredulously as the door shut and she realized he was blocking her only exit.

Maya, we  have  to talk.”

She took a few backwards steps and crossed her arms. “Fine”, she muttered. “Say what you need to say.”

He approached her slowly. “Do you wanna run or do you want it straight in the face?”

She blinked warily and looked over her shoulder contemplating if she could jump out the window. “You don’t have to do this… whatever this is. If you’re trying to make me feel better… I’m fine.”

Sure”, Lucas muttered sarcastically. “You’ve barely spoken to me in months, but you’re fine.”

Why are you doing this?”

Because we should have talked about us a long time ago.”

There’s nothing to talk about”, Maya said quietly. “There is no ‘ us ’. We’re friends. End of story; close the book.”

I’ve said it before, and I’m gonna say it again. I don’t like when we fight.

Ohh-kay”, she squinted at him curiously. “Lucas, I’m going to say something, and I’m gonna need you to just agree with me so we can all go back to our normal lives”, Maya said turning her glar e back at the floor. “Because honestly this is ridiculous”, she muttered.

I’m not agreeing to that”, he rolled his eyes.

Before everything went completely sideways… you said you decided that we should all stop because you didn’t want to hurt anyone-”

That’s not exactly what I said”, Lucas protested.

Why didn’t you just tell me?” she sighed exasperatedly.

Tell you what?”

That you chose Riley! I mean- what did you think was going to happen?”

Maya-”

Things could have gone back to the way they were. It would have been fine. You didn’t have to pretend-”

Hey! Don’t put words in my mouth just because you’re scared”, he snapped, finally said interrupting her long-winded rant. “ You know that’s not how that happened.”

Her eyes narrowed in anger and suspicion. “Are you really going to try to tell me that Riley wasn’t what you wanted”

Alright, you want the truth?”

Oh, I don’t want to be having this conversation at all”, Maya scoffed. “But while we’re here, by all means, lie to me”, she said sarcastically.

What you said at the ski lodge… you were wrong.”

She raised her eyebrows and took a few steps toward the direction of the rows of desks. “A lot of things were said at the ski lodge”, she shrugged nonchalantly. “What was I wrong about this time?”

I was angry at you because I thought you were being reckless-“

I was saving Farkle from falling off a cliff!” Maya threw her hands up.

I know!” he raked a hand through his hair, trying to stifle his aggravation. “And then we got back and you basically try to tell me that I wasn’t really mad at you because I like when we fight.”

Lucas-”

I’m telling you that you’re wrong. That’s not what that was about. We’ve all gotten into a few scrapes the last few years… but thought I was going to have to watch you fall and break your  neck .”

Okay… I get that. But I wasn’t doing something stupid just for fun, Lucas. I had to help Farkle.”

Do you remember how furious you were with me in Texas? When I wouldn’t back out of the rodeo? Honestly, listening to you would have been the smarter decision.”

Maya grimaced.  She’d never tell him, but she had nightmares about that day.  “What’s your point?” she asked softly.

It didn’t feel good, did it?” he asked seriously. “I ignored your feelings, even when you were so worried you threatened to never speak to me again. It felt like-“

Rocks in your stomach?” she muttered grimly.

He sighed. “Something like that.”

Okay”, she shrugged. “I get it. You got angry because you were worried. Don’t you think we all worry about each other when we’re doing something stupid? What’s your point?”

I like that we can joke around, alright? I do. I know you’re teasing is just your way of being affectionate-“

Watch it, Hee-Haw-“

and it’s your defense mechanism ”, he added pointedly, voice raising briefly to talk over her. “But it’s not the same when we’re angry at each other, is it? You don’t get to tell me that I ‘like when we tangle’ when it means what we’re doing is actually stomping on each other’s feelings. That’s not who we are, Maya. Maybe I should have just been relieved that everyone was okay that day… but I was so angry at you. And then you blew me off. I spent a long time thinking about what it is that I like about you and I. It took longer than it should have.”

I will literally give you my left big toe if you just stop this conversation”, she whined.

You pushed me at Riley. Tell me why.”

My left big toe ”, she insisted vehemently.

Lucas grimaced. “I know I hurt you, Maya. And I can’t change the way things happened. It was the last thing I wanted.”

I know that. I don’t think you’d hurt anyone on purpose”, she tilted her head and looked up at him reluctantly.

Friends don’t massacre each other. That’s not what this is.”

Feelings are… whatever they are. I don’t- I’m telling you that you don’t need to lie to me to make me feel better. I accepted my reality a long time ago.”

I’m sorry”, he repeated. “For every time I thought I understood you and I was wrong. I’m sorry for not understanding your feelings, and for taking so long to figure out my own. Mostly, I’m sorry we’re in a situation where you don’t feel safe because if something I did. I want to earn your trust back-“

Can’t we just go back to the way things were? We’re friends. We can pretend what happened in Texas never happened-“

Do you really think that’s where it started, Maya? I don’t. And you know we can’t go back. Nothing good comes from that”, he said quietly. “I know you know that.”

If Riley hadn’t opened her big mouth, none of this would have happened.” She snorted. “Let’s not pretend I was even an option for you. I know you’re too nice to say it, but I do  know that. And it’s fine.”

It’s not  fine . You basically disappeared! Explain that one to me, Houdini!” he snapped.

Yow ”, she grumbled.

Look… you’re not entirely wrong. I never really looked at you like that. But once that door opened? All I could see was was how terrifying that idea was-“

Because I’m very scary”, she teased, nodding her head playfully.

Stop .” His jaw clenched in annoyance. “I saw what we could be. I did. The more time passed, the stronger my feelings were even if I didn’t understand it. I just- I wasn’t ready for that. And I don’t think you were either. And then you told me my choice was Riley.”

I know what I did”, she mumbled. “I was there. Look, I know Riley and I put a lot of pressure on you, and that wasn’t very fair. I’m sorry. You weren’t the cause of the problems between us. You need to know that. I know what it’s like… to need to be around someone who sees only the best in you. And that’s not me. That’s always going to be Riley.”

Lucas sighed. They could probably drag this out for hours. That day you walked out of Topanga’s… I should have stopped you. I wanted to, but things were already weird between us. I knew Riley wasn’t what you needed then, because she doesn’t understand the way things domino and crumble before you even know what’s happening. I didn’t think you’d go as far as you did, but it doesn’t change the fact that I should have gone after you. I was scared things were going to blow up.”

I made my own choices, Lucas”, she offered softly. “You couldn’t have stopped me.”  She’d never let him know how easy it would have been. He already blamed himself. And she knew now that it was more important that she’d stopped herself. It had been only the second time ever that she’d physically backed away from him… not out of fear, but because somehow he could read her better than anyone. That first time had ended with an almost-kiss that seemed like a lifetime ago. The second time? She’d run out of self-preservation, not wanting him to see that she was about to shatter into a million pieces.

They understood each other in a way that was sometimes as painful as it was comforting.

We’ll never know, will we?”

You don’t have to be responsible for me, Lucas.”

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, because that’s what Mr. Matthews has been teaching us for years: that we’re  not  responsible for our friends.”

Things are what they are. Leave them be.” Her eyes rolled at his persistence.

No . Why are you doing this? You don’t want this any more than I do.”

Maybe not”, she threw her hands up. “But more than that- I don’t want to be a constant reminder of your mistakes”, Maya suggested tensely. “I mean, Riley’s the most perfect person I’ve ever known and you’ve seen the things I’ve convinced her to do… and that’s who she thinks I am. I jump off the cliff without a parachute, Lucas. I don’t listen to anybody. That’s who I am. That’s not who you are. Maybe I didn’t want to ruin your life too.”

I don’t see you like that.” He was staring at her, arms crossed, looking as frustrated as she felt. “Riley was  wrong , Maya. And you never gave yourself a chance. You’re a good person. Not as Riley…  as you .”

Thank you, Cowboy Fortune Cookie”, she teased mildly, hoping to alleviate some of the tension.

It didn’t work. And Lucas seemed on the edge of making a decision that would throw them both off a cliff.

I’m sorry”, he said earnestly. “I never wanted to hurt you”, he said seriously.

Maya frowned. “I know that”, she muttered. “Remember what I said at the beginning of the year?” she shrugged. “This was a no- win situation. Someone was getting massacred no matter what.”

Maybe… but why do you think it’s always gotta be you?”

Her eyes opened wide and she froze. “Pardon me?” She asked in that extra sweet voice she used when she wanted to rip someone’s head off.

He glared at her instead of backing off like a smarter person would have. “Hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do.”

I got that. Thanks. You’ve made your point.” His glare made her mouth snap shut and she sighed. “Look, you didn’t- This isn’t on you, Lucas.”

Because you took the decision out of my hands? So you really think I’m okay with you hurting yourself to keep other people happy?!”

She stared incredulously as his voice got louder. “Oh, so we’re yelling now?” Maya raised her voice just slightly to make a point, tossing her hands in frustration.

Maybe!” Lucas snapped exasperatedly.

0

Out in the hallway:

I did  not  give him permission to yell at her!” Riley complained, sitting up from her slouch against the lockers.

They’re both more honest when they’re mad”, Zay said, sounding unconcerned. “They’ll be okay. Maya’s stubborn, but she can handle him. You know… she doesn’t mind his anger issues. They don’t scare her, and she doesn’t take it personally. She just waits for the wave to pass. He’d hold back more if she did.”

He really does like her, doesn’t he?” Riley asked, starting to worry she was actually in the middle of a scheme she had no business touching.”

You’re kidding right?” Zay gave her an alarmed look . “Lucas is so stupid over Maya, he didn’t even know he was stupid over Maya!” He threw his hands up. “Nobody listens to me.”

He’s got a point”, Farkle said thoughtfully.

Thank you!” Zay half-yelled, feeling vindicated.

So… that day she dressed up as me… what happened?” Riley frowned, eyebrows scrunching. “ I feel like everything got all jumbled up, but I was wrong about what it was.”

Yeah, that wasn’t really one thing, was it?” Zay sighed. “I wasn’t even here. Lucas called me the day you guys did your Freaky Friday weirdness.”

He called you?” Riley asked.

Yeah, he said you were the cutest Sith Lord ever and Maya was doing a terrifying version of Mary Poppins.”

Riley sighed happily. “I like Mary Poppins.”

Of course you do, sugar.”

Just a spoonful”, she started.

Oh no”, muttered Farkle.

It does help the medicine go down”, she said earnestly. “It  does !”

You know that song was written about the Polio vaccine, right?” Farkle said blandly, going back to his physics homework.

Zay kicked his shoe. “Don’t ruin it for her.”

0

Back in the classroom:

Stop apologizing”, she said finally. “ You didn’t do anything that I didn’t do to myself”, she muttered before walking to the back wall of the classroom.

Maya, you protect  everybody . Let me be the one who worries about you.”

Why?!  Why would you want that? You and I can never happen, Lucas. You know that right? The world would explode.”

I don’t believe that”, Lucas said softly. “I don’t think you really do either.” He took a step closer, studying her curiously. “Do you want to know what I think about you?” he asked, sounding amused.

Her eyes shot up, and she quirked an eyebrow. “Do not-”

He grinned, and her stomach flip-flopped painfully.

I think I’m gonna tell you.”

She held up a hand in protest. “Don’t use my own words against me!” she protested.

Lucas gave her a slight nod and held his hand out. “Come here.”

Maya groaned. “Oh, come on-” He reached for her and she allowed it, nose scrunched in a skeptical pout. “We’re hugging again?” she whined. “Really?”

Maya? Is this okay?”

Yes ”, she sighed, giving up and returning the hug, trying not to enjoy it too much . He gave good hugs. It was… frustratingly comfortable. Don’t do this”, she whispered, ducking so her forehead brushed his shoulder. “Not unless you’re sure you mean it. I can’t- what happened at New Year’s was bad enough. I don’t want to be a second choice. Put me out of my misery now if you’re just waiting for a time you and Riley might work out. Don’t just tell me what you think I want to hear, Lucas. That’s not real.”

I would never do that to you”, he promised.

“I- maybe- okay”, she said softly as she slowly stepped back. “Are you sure?”

Lucas chuckled. “I don’t think any of us are sure about anything. “But I think we could be something more. Can we just… I want to give us a fair chance”, he said quietly. “Can we do that? Let me prove to you that I mean it?”

She gnawed on her. “Okay”, Maya said after a minute.

“Really?”

She nodded. “I don’t know how to do this, but we can try… if you promise to be patient with me.”

“Always.”

What are the chances our friends are all still in the hallway?” Maya asked wryly.

Lucas rolled his eyes. “One hundred percent.”

She snorted. “Of course.”

Are we good?”

Maya sighed. “Yeah, Ranger Rick. We’re good.”

They stared at each other for several long seconds before nodded toward the hallway before Maya grimaced. “We should probably-”

“Yeah.” Lucas held his hand out.

She sighed and nodded before she took it.

They crossed the room together.

Maya opened the door.

Their friends had taken spots on the floor against the lockers on the opposite wall and appeared to be doing their homework. All of them looked up at the sound of the door opening.

Riley stared with narrowed eyes. “You guys were in there for almost an hour.”

Well, we’re invested now”, Farkle said. “What happened?”

My butt hurts”, Zay feigned annoyance at them.

Please tell me everything is okay now”, Riley pleaded. “I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in months!”

Maya snorted. “You’re all ridiculous.”

I don’t think  we’re  the ones-” Za y started.

Farkle pointed at Maya and Lucas. Well, they are holding hands, so...”

“That’s a good thing! Right?” Riley demanded, sounding a bit panicked. “Right?!

Maya gave her a wide-eyed almost glare as she tried not to blush.

Farkle interrupted her, staring at Maya with amusement. “It’s the shoulders isn’t it?” he teased.

She let out a laugh of utter shock. “ Farkle!

Notes:

Okay, guys! Sorry for the wait. We just have the epilogue coming, everything should be wrapped up neatly. I wrestled with this chapter. Hopefully the length makes up for the wait!

The epilogue is half written, but I know how it ends, I just have some details to fill in, and plan to finish it up next week. Thanks for baring with me. Chronic migraines make it extremely difficult to spend any length of time hunched over a screen. I’m so relieved to have this nearly wrapped up for you guys.